#as a reminder I am more active on my Instagram account

[pizzabox-box]

Not a question about anything pizza tower related, I'm just curious about you (in the least creepy way you can take that)! Do you have other blogs/social media accounts (wants to see more art)? What're your pronouns/a name you want to go by? /Most/ importantly, what's the art program(s) you use? It reminds me so much of an old mobile app I used to use, but I think it's pure coincidence!

I go by Rookie Cookie/Rookie/Pizzabox .My pronouns she/her or they/them. My main blog is @rookies-cookies-art so if you see blog named rookies-cookies-art liking your stuff that's me! But there isn't much on there yet. (In fact, there's absolutely nothing yet)

This was actually supposed to be a side blog for the event for when I sometimes make something Pizza Tower related. But I got carried away and well, you know the rest. I became that one full time Pizza Tower artist that mixes fake and real Peppino in various ways and reports the results. (oh well)

In case you want to chat my discord is: rookie_cookie_

You can also find me on instagram under the name: rookie_cookie_

But beware:

I am not active on there anymore

it's Minecraft focused

The art is pretty outdated. I mean I'm not bad, but it's kinda edgy and angsty, especially the older drawings (I say as if whatever is going on with all these au's isn't dark and angsty lol )

I draw my stuff with the help of a regular tablet and a finger. And I have been doing so for the last 6 years. (don't worry I still have all of my fingers👍)

I use sony Sketch. A great ad free app, I have been using that since very begining :) Sometimes when I want to draw on my PC I use Drawpile.

Besides Pizza Tower I'm big fan of all sorts of evolution/creature games (Spore,Thrive,Elysian Eclipse you name it! ) And building/creative focused/chill games. (Slime rancher FTW :D)

Aside from drawing my other hobbies include all kinds of crafts (sculpting) and p l a n t s .

[xxivletxx]

m!Corrin thingies by yours truly

[large-baguette-112]

omg an intro post??? in this economy???

Uhhh hi!! I'm Nugget! (though Nug or Nugs is fine as well :])

I'm a 20 year old artist and aspiring author who just likes reblogging my blorbos,,

my current fixations are Rain World, Hollow Knight, Ōkami, Runaway To The Stars (made by @/jayrockin), Outer Wilds, The August Few by Sam Fennah and taxidermy, but I mostly reblog Rain World related stuffs rn smdhdjd

I'm aroace and nonbinary, I use any/all pronouns, but feel free to just use they/them if you don't wanna get confused!

I have an art account!! @large-band-112

more under the cut because I don't wanna make this post very long BAHAHA

DNI Stuffs

(will be updated as time goes on, I'm just listing stuff off the top of my head rn)

If you're racist, pedophilic, ableist, homophobic, nazi, an AI artist, or just generally an asshole you will be blocked as soon as I find out. I do not tolerate any of this on my page.

As for tagging..

I try to keep this account fairly sfw, but i do occasionally reblog some suggestive posts (nothing raunchy tho dw) if I deem them safe-ish enough. I do my best to tag them accordingly!

I will try to tag any triggers or just general uncomfortable things, but I do not have the best knowledge of such things and will likely not know to tag them. If there is something I reblog/post frequently and it is a triggering subject, please let me know. I'm not very well versed on such things and would appreciate the assistance! I will do my best otherwise.

Also!!

If you're a mutual or just really wanna get to know me, feel free to dm me/ask for my discord!! I'm always down for a chat but I do have suuper bad social anxiety. If it takes me a while to respond I'm likely just trying to gather the courage to talk to you!

I am okay with people using my art to heavily reference or trace with credit (optional but preferred)!!!

the only thing I ask of you is if I can see it when it's done! I don't mind people using my art to help improve their own works, i actually love seeing it! However one thing i do NOT accept is people using my art for AI. do that shit and i will explode you forever actually

While my dms are open to mutuals who need to vent, I want a warning first. Nothing big, just ask before you begin so I can have the time to prepare myself.

While I am quite active here, I also have an Instagram! My art account there is large_band112, you'll find my main in its bio, but I don't post often there any more :)

I will say, I'm not as informed about stuff as I'd like to be.. If I say or do something offensive, please, please let me know. I will do my best to reeducate myself. I also ask to be patient with me, as sometimes I forget things, and will likely need to be reminded (just like.. outdated things that have new names n such for example).

[ryealize]

🦋 きらきら星！

Disclaimer. Please read before adding.

ARIN WESTED

Pleasantries! Allow me to express my gratitude to all of you. The admin would like to clarify things that will appear on this account to avoid possible misunderstandings and conflicts that will might occur as soon as I start roleplaying my chosen muse. So please spare some time to read this as I will briefly discuss everything here. Make reading a habit.

To start with, I would like to state that I'm not the real Arin Wested and in no way related to her, her relatives, and her company. I do not have any intention to ruin her image and career. This account was solely made for roleplaying purposes only. And I will be using this account to promote her and her future projects. Arin Wested is an South Korean Youtuber known for posting content about her daily life. She also posts beauty and baking content. She currently has 580,000 subscribers on her YouTube channel, wested_arin. She began to showcase various aspects of her life on her YouTube channel in 2020 and starts to expand her contents posting beaty and baking related later on. With an concentration upon relatable and diverse topics, she has gained fame among viewers whom appreciate her insights and experiences. Moreover, the pictures and videos that I will be attaching to my posts are all from Facebook, Youtube, Instagram, and other social media platforms. While the captions were all made by the user of this account. So please do not steal it as it takes hours for me to finish it. In addition, I will be using the English language for my posts. You will probably see some grammatical errors as English is not my first language. If you see some, it will be a big help for me to improve more if you will nicely educate me through private message. 

Furthermore, Please be reminded that I will only accept those accounts that will be commenting here and will not be accepting accounts that have fancy fonts on their timeline and accounts that are still on hiatus or closed. As I am aiming for active, friendly, and interactive mutual. So that I can interact with all of you. I avoid inactive and displays on my friend list due to I'm having a hard time unfriending mutuals that is no longer active. Please do proceed to the comment section if you wish to be accepted. Make sure to reply with the right code for acceptance. If you have any concerns do not hesitate to slide on my private message.

Love, Ilaerye.

[arcane-abomination]

These are my Art and Social Media accounts. I do have more but these are the only ones I am active on anymore. I’ll add to this list as things develop.

🌹⚜️ Bluesky ⚜️ 🌹

🌹⚜️ Toyhouse ⚜️🌹

🌹⚜️ Instagram ⚜️🌹

🌹⚜️ TikTok ⚜️🌹

🌹⚜️ Discord ⚜️🌹

I do have rules for interactions. Please follow them. Or I’ll block you!

Don’t message me for dating purposes. I’m happily married.

I don’t interact with certain types of people. You can find the list HERE!

Don’t message me for sexual purposes. I may write and draw porn but that doesn’t mean I want to do that stuff IRL with you.

Sometimes it may take a bit to return messages. I do have ADHD so it can slip my mind. Please politely remind me.

I don’t do drama. Please kindly leave me out of your mess. I don’t mind if CLOSE FRIENDS rant and let off steam but if I don’t know you that well I don’t care. Sorry to be blunt but there’s a big difference in people that I consider a meaningful part of my life and people I barely know or don’t know that well.

I’m up for friendly debates on various subjects but just not religion and my beliefs.

Constructive critique is welcome, but not blatant criticism. Constructive Critique is unbiased and lists positive points and negative points in a polite manner with the intention of improving certain skills. Blatant criticism does not. It can often come off as rude and is extremely bias. It plays on the commenters personal agenda and taste rather than the creators intentions and subject matter. In turn, it doesn’t offer any advice for meaningful improvement.

[alwaysbringabookwithyou]

24.04.2023 The person behind the account!!

Hello - I’m not on here a lot but I wanted to remind you all that I’m still around and actually am much more active over on my Instagram @phdoingmydamnbest

I’ve come a long way since starting this account as a teen, to turning it into an active book blogging space after my stroke to help me rediscover joy and help my recovery, and now I’m getting my PhD!

If you want to support me as I try doing this thing honesty the BEST thing to do is to come be in community with me over on insta. If even like 10% of people did that here it would make such a huge and helpful difference! I appreciate you all and this platform so much - it’s brought me a long way!

[hypergamiss]

Hello mam

I'm a 18 yr old girl and I am in a dilemma. So all of my friends are on social media, i.e., insta to be specific whereas I m active too but I'm not social( I just watch reels) . But recently I feel the urge to make an official account. But I think of it as immature and time wasting because I constantly stereotype it like that. This doesn't make me feel good about myself. But I want to talk to my friends on insta, what is your take? Also i have exams in 20 days so I feel confused

Thank you

I don’t have an official take for you because I don’t use social media for personal use. If you want to have an Instagram account to feel some sense of community with your friends that’s completely up to you. Just make sure it doesn’t affect your mental health. People like to flaunt and project a perfect life on social media, so remind yourself that that isn’t reality. We are all imperfect and going through our own personal struggles.

Another thing to consider is your digital footprint. These companies are gathering more data on you than you could possibly imagine. And it’s not to benefit you at all, only them. I most recently learned about an ai program that will pull a persons meta account data and analyze it to predict how likely they are to become a felon.

[motleyfolk]

Examining How I Use The Internet

Prompted by this page I’ve realised I’m doing a lot of mindless scrolling and procrastinating a lot with the internet. Time to fix that. Mari Kondo’ing this shit.

Reddit: I mindlessly scroll and always gravitate to drama subs like AITA, which just depresses the life out of me and drags me into negativity. 

Solution: Block the bad subreddits with stayfree and use it to put a limit on how much time I spend on there, so I can still access useful and informative subreddits but not doomscroll. Stayfree did heehaw but I found a simple extension that blocked the subreddits and then used Ublock to hide popular posts so basically it’s just my specific feed now. Win!

Tumblr: I also mindlessly scroll here, albeit less. Sometimes on instinct I feel the need to put on a persona or post certain things or overly clarify things to appease spectators I’ve crafted in my head or feel a need to perform. Makes using this site stressful.

Solution: Remind myself this tumblr is my digital journal and while I’m open to making friends this is not something I’m doing to get clout. I am here to collect, learn and explore. 

Twitter: I rarely go on it anymore, and I just don’t like it. The only things that were on it that I liked were cute and cozy aesthetic accounts, but even then nah.

Solution: Delete it. Twitter gone woo crab rave

Discord: I use it the most to talk directly to irl and online friends, have a bookclub and get updates on random stuff. Sometimes it feels like a void.

Solution: ?? Need it to talk to friends. Just meditate or smth. Like tumblr, don’t feel the need to perfom or put on a persona. Vibe only.

Youtube: Also started procrastinating by going on there with the intention to watch this One Specific video and then I’m on the 4th Im Skylar White Yo lego video. 

Solution: See if there’s something that can block the yt homepage and just see subscriptions or smth. ABSOLUTE UBLOCK W HOW IS THIS SO EASY AND I NEVER KNEW?!

Emails: I’m scared to even touch my gmails bc of the amount of spam mail I’ve accumulated since I was 8.

Solution: Buckle up and start unsubscribing to junk mail and clearing them out THEN switch from gmail to literally anything. Done techgirl email

Internet In General: I think I use a decent not centralized browser. I use yt adblock like a champ. But I really need to go over security notes, find a vpn, make sure this browser is cool, download that torrent browser thing sometime. 

Solution: Find vpn, get torrent browser thing, use throw away emails or card info.

I also generally feel like I have to put on a performance. Is this down to that one time I was a microceleb in this one niche shitty instagram community? Maybe. Theres a voice at the back of my head like “Will this get notes? Will people laugh at this? Does this fit? Will this slightly put someone off?” and its exhausting because I’m not here to get clout I’m just wanting to chill!! I do however want to make friends and meet like-minded folks, don’t wanna create an echo chamber for myself. Hm...

Solution: Recognise this behaviour, the thoughts. Listen to them, deconstruct them, let them pass. Do this constantly. Do not engage them or let them influence you. (realising this sounds like some spc lmao)

I sometimes skip posts with hardly any upvotes or notes because unconciously Im only paying attention to bigger posts. This means I miss out on tons.

Solution: Use good ol ublock to hide note and upvote elements.

Spotify: Love music. Like the spotify wrapped thing. Hate spotify, it is evil company. I don’t even pay for it thanks to my bestie. But...

Solution: Compile music elsewhere (where ?)

Instagram: I’m not actually active on it, I just still have it bc it has tons of cool anime edits I’ve saved over the years. But I hate zuckergram.

Solution: Export the sick edits and delete zuckergram. I will do this on my phone.

End Notes

Compared to a year ago I’m much more aware of how I’m using the internet. My phone usage is down to nilch, it’s almost like I never spent 16 hours a day on instagram straight as a kid.

Having a path still ahead to walk down doesn’t negate the mountain I climbed before.

The sites I use most are Reddit, YT, Tumblr, Discord. Thats four I’ve whittled it down to, which is actually an ok number, not too bad. One for solitary reading, one for spooks and funny videos, one for semi solitary blogging, one for communication.

Should come back to this later and re-examine things and not forget to do these things.

[sillaysii]

Hi. Would be nice if you read this.

Let me be honest. Instagram, where I'm usually active, is getting kinda uncomfortable for me to use. Some people there are really mean about me drawing what i want (shippy art for example). I remember i posted Brinky doodles on my alt account and someone commented "good. Now draw them fucking" i know it wasn't meant to be serious but i was so uncomfortably caught off guard so i deleted that post and lost motivation to draw at all. i just want to remind i am A REALLY young minor, and i don't want anyone to make weird jokes about me or my art, please be respectful to me and other people in general. Also sometimes i take jokes way too seriously so be careful with your words 💀

Tho last time i posted shippy art on insta no one really said it was cursed. Quite the opposite. But I'm still not sure.. I'll be more active here for a while anyway.

[rxbeetle]

LIFE UPDATE - 9/1/2024

I've deactivated/deleted a lot of my main social media platforms

they are the following:

Instagram(archive)

Instagram(main)

Twitter(main)

Ko-fi

they held a lot of memories and good times (also bad times) and I know there will be times were I will maybe look back on a funny tweet or conversation I've had, and in those moments I will probably regret deleting my accounts, but I'm confident 2+ years time I will be more at peace with this decision.

____________________________________________________________

BACKSTORY

I made my presence known on social media not for socializing but to network because at the time I wanted a job in the arts, and I felt like I almost made it too, but sometime late 2022 I felt like I might've just reached my peak, I was progressing at speeds unfamiliar to me and I burnt myself out so bad I'm not sure I've really recovered.

Of course I'm still drawing but it hasn't felt the same since 2022

___________________________________________________________

PRESENT DAY

so I stopped pursuing art professionally back 2022, why am I still online then?

"I'm keeping social media for my friends!"

It's the truth, my close mutuals whom I've known for years have been the driving force keeping me online (In a good way). but there's a better way for me to go about living like this.

using my former network accounts past 2022 has been reminding me of my shortcomings, chipping away at my self esteem, and this summer has put me at an all time low in terms of feeling like shiz. so I'm pretty glad to see them go.

_____________________________________________________________

I'm keeping my Tumblr here for updates and maybe some artworks around.

My Youtube, Tiktok, and Itch.io will remain online.

any other accounts I still have unmentioned will likely go down in the future.

I will stay active on my Discord : rxbeetle

-Seegle

[rainart455]

My Instagram

Making a quick post to remind y'all that I have an Insta and I am more active on there :)

https://www.instagram.com/carto_onlover45/

Plus, my traditonal art account

https://www.instagram.com/rains_traditional_art/

[snowyjinsoul-sales]

hi, welcome to my kpop sale-trade-grouporder blog!

‼️ this is a work in progress‼️

my name is Lily, or @snowyjinsoul here on tumblr, as well as instagram and twitter! i’m a member of the kpop buy-sell-trade community on instagram, with over a year of experience in hosting photocard and album group orders mainly for loona (+ loossemble, odd eye circle, artms and chuu).

keep reading under the cut for general info, sales/trades/GO info, post directory, and more!

ABOUT ME

🔹 Lily (she/her), 23 years old, Graphic Designer, based in Germany

🔹 ult: LOONA, ARTMS, LOOSSEMBLE, CHUU, Lee Chaeyeon

🔹 stan: STAYC, tripleS, FiftyFifty, LeSserafim, IVE, Minseo, Kwon Eunbi, Yena, Idle

🔹 dni if you’re racist, sexist, homophobic, ableist, younger than 14, …

🔹 if you’re a minor please make sure you have permission from your guardians to be active in the bst community, and if there’s anything i need to be aware of when packing your items please let me know!

🔹 I work Monday to Friday 8-6 so I might not respond immediately, but I will always get back to you asap 💖 Feel free to bump messages if i haven’t answered in longer than a day!

IMPORTANT LINKS

tba

GENERAL INFO

🔹 Items will be packed in order of: Penny sleeve > Toploader > Folded card > Envelope (+ everything secured with washi tape & sticky tape)

🔹 I always put a return address on my letters

🔹 For larger items I will use bubble wrap and/or cardboard

🔹 I will send address checks via DM

🔹 I only offer shipping through my local postal services Deutsche Post and DHL

🔹 Items will usually be dropped off on the weekend, I drop them off at a public mailbox or packstation

🔹 I don’t write usernames on envelopes, instead I will put a sticker or symbol on the envelope, & I will send a drop-off video via DM

⚠️ Once the letter is dropped off I’m no longer responsible for any damages or lost mail! ⚠️

GROUP ORDERS

I’m an established GOM with one year of experience and I always strive to improve my workflow and services, so if there‘s any questions, critiques or concerns please do let me know! :>

Please do not join my GOs if you cannot foresee yourself being able to cover all required payments.

GO Terms and Conditions

No backouts once I have requested payment unless you have found someone to replace you.

⚠️ If you go AWOL (away without leave) on me you will be blocked and blacklisted from my account. Timewaster and/or DWAYOR posts may also be made if I see it as necessary.

⚠️ If you do not pay initials by the deadline mentioned in the respective groupchat you will be removed from the GO. Repeat offenders will be blocked and blacklisted from my account. I only send payment reminders if there’s been no activity in the groupchat for several days before, it is your own responsibility to pay on time.

⚠️ I am happy to cater for extensions and payment plans but you must tell me at least 24 hours before the payment deadline. Extensions after this point will only be given for extreme circumstances and will only be given at my discretion.

⚠️ No refunds once I have received the first payment.

No strict deadline for doms payments if I am collecting them separately as I will hold items until I receive payment. However if I receive no response after 2 weeks I reserve the right to put your items back up for sale/trade.

GOs General Info

🔹 There’s usually 2 to 4 payments and I will provide price breakdowns on the respective GO Notion page / GO spreadsheets

🔹 If there’s a tracking link or number I check up on it’s progress regularly and send updates if there’s anything of importance

🔹 I will collect everyone’s addresses and info through google forms

🔹 When packing I will confirm your claims and address via DM

⚠️ For cheap photocard GOs I usually do not check the condition of the pcs extremely thoroughly. If there‘s any major scratches, bends, etc. I will of course notice and disclose it, but I will not check them under light for minor scratches, indents, or misprints

🔹 Once I’m able to send out I will post a video in my instagram story of me dropping the letters off at a public mailbox (with the addresses covered up, of course)

🔹 Packing info and costs will be calculated depending on the type of item and its size. I aim to make it inexpensive, and I am transparent about the costs and how I pack it.

SALES

🔹 i am operating all sales through a sales enquiry form, the link to the sales form is available via the “important links” section of this post or in every sales post

🔹 WW for photocards and other small items, European Union only for albums and other bigger items

🔹Prices listed in Euros € unless stated otherwise.

🔹 Payment only per Paypal F&F!

🔹 If you pay per G&S I will refund you immediately and block & blacklist you from my accounts

🔹 You have 24 hours to provide proof of payment or the item will be released for sale again! i can however hold items for up to 72 hours, just ask ^^

🔹 Addresses shared via my sales form will be deleted once you either receive your items, or if a sale does not go through / the items you were interested in were already sold

TRADES

🔹 Trading only within EU (European Union)

🔹 Not trading with non-kpop-related accounts and/or accounts with less than 10 proofs (unless i know you from instagram or we’ve traded before)

🔹 When dming me for a trade, please include exactly which of my items you are interested in and what you are offering to trade! Any dms that only say “I’m interested in trading” without specifications will be ignored

⚠️ You and I both have the right to back out of a sale/trade if either party feels uncomfortable, as long as addresses haven’t been shared or money has been exchanged. ⚠️

SHIPPING INFO

This is a list of (most) countries that I sell / ship to. Additionally I will sell to any other countries that can send money via PayPal F&F (friends and family). Under no circumstances ever will I accept payments via PayPal G&S (goods and services). Please make sure you can pay via PayPal F&F before contacting me.

🔹 Albania, Andorra, Austria, Australia, Belgium, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Bulgaria, Canada, Croatia, Cyprus, Czech Republic, Denmark, Estonia, Finland, France, Germany, Greece, Hungary, Iceland, Ireland, Italy, Latvia, Liechtenstein, Lithuania, Luxembuorg, Malta, Netherlands, Norway, Philippines, Poland, Portugal, Romania, Slovakia, Slovenia, Spain, South Africa, Sweden, Switzerland, United Kingdom, United States

SHIPPING PRICES

tba

[tennypolenski]

A Day in the Life of a 21st Century Student

*ring*

Every morning, an alarm I set the night before using my phone wakes me up. But, of course, a simple alarm cannot wake me up completely on its own. To make sure I don't snooze off again and end up late for my classes or daily activities, I often surf the Internet after turning the alarm off — TikTok, Instagram, Messenger, and Twitter (I refuse to call it 'X'), to name a few. These applications entertain me and allow me to interact with friends and even other people on the Internet.

Then, I'd finally get up, make the bed, and prepare myself for the day. On Thursdays, I have a class at seven o'clock in the morning. Thankfully, that class is done virtually: so, I don't have to get ready earlier than 6:30 AM, which is my prep time for an online class at 7. Once I'm physically and mentally prepped, I take a seat in front of my online school paraphernalia — laptop, keyboard and mouse that are all placed on my study table — turn my laptop on, and log into my Canvas Account and join the online class via Google Meet.

With that being said, I am reminded of the one thing I am already certain of:

Being a student in the 21st century is truly an extraordinary experience.

I have access to so many great software applications and digital services that make accomplishing tasks as a student easier. For instance, I use a certain website called Canva in making my activities look aesthetically pleasing. For designing amateurs like me, this innovation is such a big help considering that it offers a wide range of free graphics, design templates, text fonts, and more! Some students even make commissions off creating artworks using this application. Another in my list is Wondershare Filmora, an editing software that is meant for beginners in editing. Along with Canva, I have been using this application since high school whenever I need to make videos for school or even for recreational purposes. Its interface is straightforward and uncomplicated, so it really is easy to use.

And, of course, what is student life without research? The Internet, being one of the biggest technological advancements if not the biggest, has made research so much easier for students. Back then, student researchers had to scour libraries and browse pages and pages of books to find information on a certain topic. Meanwhile, a single click on search engines like Google can take you places in this age.

However, the fact that the Internet is a network of information, which means there is so much information there that it can be overwhelming. Hence, it is important for tools like Google Scholar to help narrow down the information down to relevant ones only. Undoubtedly, the Internet is an exceptional academic aid for students.

But aside from my academic life, the digital and smart technology is also a big part of my personal endeavors. I never leave our house or my dormitory without my phone since it has a variety of uses. At some point of the day like around lunchtime, I have my break. And during this time, I tend to get bored. To entertain myself, I usually open Loklok and watch any film or television show available on that platform for free — no subscriptions required. Although they have a premium version for benefits, I am still able to watch freely as the application is supported by advertisements. For the same purpose, I also play games like Mobile Legends — usually, with my boyfriend — to relieve off stress and relax. In addition, I sometimes browse my phone for captured memories in pictures and videos. I have a terrible memory, so storing them in pixels is a must for me. Moreover, I can also use my phone to communicate and connect with loved ones and peers: be it for academic or personal purposes. Sometimes, I use this time to do some chores like groceries, paying bills, and others, also using my phone which can be used to take down notes and mark my appointments. Since it is lunchtime, I also go out to buy food, still bringing my phone with me. I use Life360 for location tracking purposes, either to find my ways when I'm lost or to share my location to trusted individuals if I'm not certain about my safety, especially when I go out at night to buy dinner.

The day finally comes to an end and the sky outside starts to get darker; but my productivity does not end yet at this point. Usually, I am still in front of my laptop until midnight. But as soon as everything has already been done, I lay on my bed, rest, and get ready to sleep.

That is my routine as a 21st century student. There isn't much physical socializing with friends since most times, we are all busy and can only meet in academic breaks. Regardless, it is still fulfilling to me — made possible by the digital advancements we have today. I am able to talk to loved ones whenever I feel tired. I can distract myself from stress by watching or playing games. Nor do I have to worry so much about my safety since there are applications out there that can help me.

Indeed, these technologies has made life more tolerable and has given us an opportunity to excel with the advantages they offer.

Hence, the society must work to protect the integrity of these technologies and ensure the longevity of these benefits. Otherwise, these benefits can turn to threats and actually do more harm than good.

[herluminosity]

Day 12

Well. Shit happened. My bestie and I got into a major fight on Saturday. It all started because I had enough of her ghosting me. Being taken for granted by her. And the reason why I didn't write this right away, is because I needed time. I needed time to talk with my therapist and friends I trust. And a wee bit with my aunt.

It just came out as a long ass paragraph.

And im not ashamed to put it here. "If you and your mom keep on with the no replying I will not go to Arizona. Ima be straight up. I'm getting tried of being taken for granted. It's always when I have no internet access you care and wanna talk. But the second I do, it's weeks till j hear anything. And I see you online at night time. So I'm done. I'm done. I feel like I'm putting everything into this relationship. I get it. Your "busy" But I'm up late and I see you online But do you drop in and say hi? No. It's always me who has to start conversations. me So I'm putting my foot down. You either leave this friendship or put in the danm work. I talked about this to my therapist And she said I should either leave or tell you how I feel. So I chose to tell you. As I care. Also. You man either unfriended me or blocked me. And when I first contacted you about this you said sorry. Yeah sorry is okay, but it's not if you make empty promises and don't change your fuckin behavior. And you also didn't explain anything to me. Your active on Instagram on both accounts playing a stupid game. Oh and I saw something you posted for the quite thingy above texts in Instagram. "Sorry if I don't respond. I may be in a happier place" then not long after it's gone. I got a screen shot of it. It was from your alt account. So yes. I'm pissed off. I'm very upset this is how I'm being treated. Idek if I still wanna be your friend. I got rid of my other friends too as I'm standing up for myself and not letting me be treated like this.

Taken for granted. Abused. Having my liver be bullied. All the above is what's I'm going through with friends.

And idfc if this is long. I am standing up for myself for the first time."

-A week later-

I keep on delaying writing this. As it's a hard topic for me. But it's been a whole week since this happened, and more shit happened that I'll post about later. But yeah anyway.

I'm starting to forget how all this happened, but I'll try to recall some details.

It all started out by that text, one above. Yeah, I'll admit it. I was a bit harsh. I regret that. I wish I came out more calm and collected. But no. I always resort to violence. And then she got pissed off, and then boom. Fighting.

She said she still loves me. That she'll always care for me. But I denied that, saying that she doesn't. That if she did,why hasn't she been there,told me things,do her job as a bestie?

She said,she has a life. That she been goin through some shit. That she doesn't even tell her boyfriend shit.

If I would of known this was how it was gonna turn out? us falling out? I think I would of calmed down. But I ruined things. Like always.

She tried her best. And I was stubborn. I was mad,and had no control over my anger. I'm always the villain.

After I blocked her,on discord, she posted stuff on insta.

Telling her followers to attack me,how bad of a bestie I am. I cut up all of the pics of her,deleted anything that reminded me of her.

To end this,if she's reading this,

You were good to me.

[a-moth-to-the-light]

facetime with my dog tonight (nov 26, 2022)

The Day, In Short

Flight home, laundry, and showering! I even washed my comforter, so my room is very nice and clean right now, which is unusual for just getting home from a trip :)

My favorite part of today was an unusually peaceful bus ride home from the airport! It came early, and it was a much smaller, homier bus than usual, with no strangers unnecessarily approaching me (which is quite a victory in any outing)! I got to listen to the new Friendly Space Ninja video, which I found delightful and finished in just a few sittings (I would gush about them right now, but I'm saving that for an end-of-year post). Now I'm just sitting doing homework, which is mostly reading (yay!!!), and then I might start filling out a form for course credit which I've kept on the back burner for a week or so now!

the little dot thingies

So I have a self-care board in my dorm, where I have a rotating cast of self-care activities that I get to put dots next to every time I complete them! I usually update my board on Fridays, but I was out of state yesterday, so I did it today! My favorite of last week's was watch TV before bed, something that really helps me relax--I'm so glad I made it a priority this past week, and I decided to add it to my mega-list of self-care inspiration! The TV show in question has mostly been Psych, which I randomly ran across on Prime Video a month or so ago and almost immediately fell in love with--I made it through season 2 in this week's binge!

The activities I can get points (which equal dots--just putting the little dots on the board is satisfying in itself!) for in the upcoming week are: leave something unfinished, flirt, healthcare, and journal. Healthcare is a big one, because I'm currently quite behind on getting in contact with my doctors, and there are a few pain-relief things I've been wanting to buy that I think I'll try and finally get this week!

OMGOMG LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT

pensando en ti: I had never heard of Lara91k before, but a clip of "pensando en ti" showed up on one of the music-focused Instagram accounts I follow (jenesaispop, I think?) and caught my attention! I posted about Clara Cava brainrot a little while ago, and my recent obsession with this song is a direct extension of that. Like "No Vaya a la Fiesta" and "Cosa Suya", my two favorite Clara Cava songs, "pensando en ti" is smooth, catchy, and, above all, simple, washed in a layer of gray skies and cold ocean waves. This is chill study music at its finest, but the gentle groove and vocal layering are enough to keep me interested, even when I'm not multitasking. Really, though, it all comes down to: ME PASO LOS DIAS PENSANDO EN TI-IIIII VI TU FOTO Y NO PUDE DORMI-IIIIIIR

prenderle fuego a todo: Andrea Santiago's "Materia Viva" is more of a legend than a song to me. Listening to it is an ethereal experience, and it hasn't lost its luster in the two years since I first added it to my playlists. Santiago released her first album this year, including a new version of "Materia Viva", but it's the title track I've been obsessed with recently, ever since I got around to listening to it. "Prenderle fuego a todo" is lovely soft rock in the vein of "Materia Viva", anchored by Andrea Santiago's raspy soprano--the typical "indie girl" voice, but with enough energy behind it to make it feel unusually compelling and natural. I've been too distracted by the first couple of songs in the album to get very far through the tracklist, but I'm so excited for more!

their coffee shop: I've been reading this Webtoon for a few weeks now--I'm not nearly caught up (I'm on episode 42 of 72), but once I am, I have a feeling this is going to become one of my consistent reads, along with Idiots Don't Catch Colds and (formerly) Let's Cast Off. The art is soft and youthful, and I find considerable joy in following a main character who reminds me so much of myself when I'm in my obsessive phases. It has always felt taboo for me to talk about my desperate, obsessive tendencies when those phases happen--in fact, I've taken this taboo so far that I'm uncomfortable with showing need at all--so I really appreciate finding a story where they're talked about honestly, covering their good, bad, and ugly aspects with compassion.

let's cast off: I mentioned above that LCO is one of my two consistent reads currently (meaning ones I read updates of whenever they come out), but it actually just ended today, when the epilogue was released early behind an ad. It's been really hard to watch this story end, as it has been a consistent part of my life for about two and a half years now (since the start of the pandemic, as you might guess), even providing my reason to live for a solid couple of months in 2021, and it's actually one of the first stories that got me writing the kind of analysis content I love creating today. I haven't posted any of my LCO writing here, but let me just say there is a lot of it stored up in my personal Discord server!

The finale definitely hasn't been my favorite part of the story, but there are some elements of this section of narrative that I really appreciate (including my second-favorite panel in the entire story, a resolution to one of the plotlines that hit me hardest back when I first started reading that's done in such a sweet, subtle way, so wonderfully mindful of all the violence that precedes it). I'm not really sure how I feel about it--it's just kind of a weight on my chest and a lump in my throat right now, leaving me too teary-eyed to do much except echo the sentiment of this quote from Mera's YouTube video "Finally, the Album":

The fact that I get to enjoy this moment in Blackpink's career, and that I get to celebrate how far they've come in 2020 alone, means a lot to me personally, because there were moments where I convinced myself I would not get that chance... This album gives me a chance to look back at my love for Blackpink, way back to the very first day, and it's like I'm looking my younger self in the eyes.

things that make brain buzz

I've gotten some work done on a couple of fiction pieces today, ones like the prose poems I've posted here before. One, I wrote a few weeks ago, and now I'm just trying to work out paragraph breaks & clean up messy sentences. The other is a random idea that hit me in the evening, so I've just been jotting notes down and trying to flesh it out a bit!

I feel doomed, so so doomed, and yet I don't want to go yet. I see the pain in front of me, and I cry for it, but I open my arms to it, too. I don't know how real it is, how accurate my visions are, but I feel them in my stomach and I feel their shadows stretch out and yet... I walk to my doom.

Content warning for references to death in the next quote!

I can't stop imagining Nadia tomorrow morning, messaging me as she curls up against the headboard of her bed, only half-awake and slowly adjusting to the five a.m. cold. Glancing down at her phone as she goes through her day, opening our messages again and again, just in case the notification never reached her lock screen. Reassuring herself: Oli sleeps in on weekends; she might need an extra people-break after such a noisy party; oh, doesn't she have a big paper to work on? I doubt Nadia would believe that I could find it in me to write in the mornings, but it feels right to think that she might start grasping at straws by noon. Too polite to show up at my door, she would worry all day and start crying by evening: did I say too much yesterday? We call each other pretty all the time, it can't have been that bad. But then, I knew what I was trying to say, and I'm sure she did, too. Maybe this is it; maybe I killed it. But no one killed it, Nadia. It's just... my time, I suppose, though it doesn't feel right to act as though I have any ownership over it. Time has chosen me.

These are from the bits I jotted down last night--as I'm sure you can guess from these, my anxiety has been particularly merciless recently, but writing was quite a helpful exorcism for it :)

Will I Do Anything Interesting Tomorrow?

I'm planning on going shopping with my friends, plus the school dining hall will finally reopen--I'm so excited to head down there again, because I miss their tea! I have an overdue library book (as usual... sigh), so maybe I can try to get done with reading that today and turn it back in later this week!

Otherwise, it'll just be homework--I have a makeup test on Monday that I want to do some studying for, and we're nearing finals, so there are plenty of papers I can do some work on.

Quote of the Day!

Wait, isn't it a bit late for soccer practice?

-- me, at 10:30 pm, completely believing my friend when he told me he was getting dropped off at soccer practice (I PROMISE I CAN USUALLY READ DEADPAN HUMOR ITS JUST AN OFF DAY)

[allyoureadislovemade]

Emotions!!??😶😶

My bestfriends are a part of my every month life (just busy people with work and studies). And my army friends and bts is my everyday part of me. Especially three of the five are the most precious to me. One is younger to me and other is older to me and the third one - bts is my overall pain reliever, my happiness... and of the three, the elder one is my everyday smile potion. we talk, we share thoughts, experiences. she reminds me of myself when i was a child, happy, cheerful, to think it is funny that i see my younger self in someone older to me, who is full of life in most aspects, when most people see the opposite in their life. Anyways, right now i want to express my mixed emotions about BTS.

Its been a year and a half since I've known them. my first song was life goes on and the first ever clip was from the award ceremony where v was crying in his red attire and had red hair. i haven't seen everything or have heard everything about them from the start. I'm still lacking in those areas. I've always felt that i wasn't with them since 2013 but told myself that it didn't matter,

Today i was in the hospital when i heard they are finally going to enlist for their military service. all that i saw was a message from a friend saying that jin is going away (her bias is jin she was super sad). i didn't have the mind space to think about it. but when i finally was in the waiting area i thought about it. i teared up, instantly. it hurt hard but couldn't cry. i manage 2 accounts on insta for them, i barely get time to update them although i try my best. And today to think that i won't have new updates from them for 2 years it makes me sad.

i'm so proud of them to do the right thing, and honestly i can't wait to see them post their service, all different looking than they are right now. i literally wanted them, still wish they would exceed their contract with hybe. i am not ready to have just met them and letting them go so soon. You know i see lot of content where people say bts have saved them, their lives, helped them , i never could understand how. Slowly their music, videos, everyday lives became a part of mine. Anger, happiness, sadness everything i felt i had them to go to. i would sit and look at them, listen to them and cherish them all day and could never get tired. They would make me happy, i would forget my sorrows for a while. One day i realized i could also feel sad while seeing them, for them... i never really thought i will be at the same place today, where i couldn't have been in the past. i thought maybe they will never be my saviors (from my worst nightmares or my sad pathetic life), coz at the end they are not someone i know personally.

Today i am feeling empty, sad, happy, excited and proud of my seven heroes. They have been my emotional support everyday since march 23rd 2021, my reason to go on one more day, to feel i will be okay coz i will see them again when i wake up the next day, to wait to see their Instagram stories or weverse posts or vlives. When i say 2 years, its not a long time. But when i think its 2022 right now, i will have to go on without seeing them next year and also the year after that, makes my heart stop. Trying to see myself in the future sad, annoyed and the hurt that i would feel for not having them by my side. To visit their profiles but not see any new posts or stories. How much time will change before they come back? How much will i change?. What if i change to the point where i don't listen to them as often as i do now? I know i will wait for them, but what if i don't or can't. Am i scared at this point? or am i just overwhelmed by having too much on my plate?

I hate them for making us super happy, and then leaving with sad news some days after. We got the new album proof after which during dinner with bts we got to know they are halting the group activities a little bit. And although we knew it was time for their military enlistment, how bighit dropped the bomb after yet to come concert in Busan. Just when we got our song 'RUN BTS' choreography. When i look back at the videos and their speeches after receiving such announcements , it makes my heart drop more. To think maybe that is why they gave their best of the best, that is why we could feel more than it was to hear in their voices, could understand the meaning of their words. Also to feel their feelings, not to sing for 2 years, not see their army their fans for 2 years. But regardless of all this i know one thing for sure...

They will make us proud... as they have always....

I Trust BTS.... I Will wait for them... i will love them more tomorrow than i do today... ❤❤💜💜