#art incoming for her sometime soon

[escaped-goat]

"A Star, by any other Light"

Astarion seduces and entices the part of me that hates myself. The part that wishes to feel the claws of a beast sink its nails into my soft belly, whisper everything I've ever wanted to hear, and devour me as I am: numbed completely from the inside.

Because there is a great and terrible addiction to my self-destruction that demands I follow the beckoning finger ever lingering above the blackened pondwater of my once clear mind.

Astarion, before the walls come down and the sun touches those parts of his soul that he swore would never be warmed; before the nightmares became just dreams he could find solace in the love of others from; before the night left his eyes and the morning dawned there instead; before all of it, he was the knife swinging low in the dark. The kind I bared my throat to with drunken haste.

Astarion, healed, would never be someone who could love me. And he could never be someone I could love safely beyond that night.

Not because he is unworthy, but simply because the abused monster of a shadow I have become desires the drag of a knife across my ribs more than the gentle caress of a lover's kiss.

I want to be maimed and ruined and torn apart, like so many times before, like my addiction dictates.

Astarion, healed, deserves better than the grasping, wheezing thing that crawls on all fours through the desert, begging for another fix. Kissing the fists that rear back to strike it.

The edge of sanity bends where the light touches the dark. It is love that will send me careening over the edge into unfathomable oblivion. It is the wretchedness of the dark that sings to me like a crooning mother through the womb.

I want his malice and his hate. If he loves me, I may perish.

---- Excerpt 32: Diary of the Dark Urge

Dirge of the Durge Series

[sangunary]

Sillouethe Of Your Soul.

BatFam x Neglected Reader.

SYPNOSIS: How could anyone missed something they've never had.

WARNING: NOT FOR SENSETIVE PEOPLE OR WHO HATE GORE. (Daddy issue incoming)

Some abuser never realised the extent of their actions nor do they try to understand the person they have hurt, they relish in being in power to chain an angel on Earth with them so they won't feel so envious of it's wings.

Some don't realise their own abused, the harsh word that left wounds deep inside their sweet angel's heart, their silhouette ligures around the house but their soul were never present... They do not understand that their own actions have consequences that hurt more than themselves.

You were abused in the silent ways, no one to cheer you own, no one to help you sleep, no one to love you.

You would watch a family so happy and perfect just that they were your family and you felt like watching as their perfection together formed an art while you watched. Just another audience watching a beautiful art.

"She was an angel"

Bruce began as he sit inside his office that left somewhere empty now... The guy who he was talking was from CPS conducting an interview after your death.

"I should have realised... she wasn't a bird like the rest, she was an angel who just needs some encouragement to fly"

Bruce was better at nursing helpless birds than an angel. He's been a father for more than he could remember but he never took onto consideration on how some kid's aren't all birds and he gave up so soon... After he realised he could nurture you like a bird.

"I would watch her silently, I couldn't realise what I was doing wrong... I didn't knew how to raise a bird like her and I realised something was wrong with her."

You would sit there at the side quietly as the rest of the family played around treating you like a ghost. Their playful banter and smile never reached yourside, you were treated like a guest at your own home.

"I kept trying tho, I pushed and pushed trying to force her to open her wings... Like the rest of the family, but it wouldn't budge"

Bruce would watch as he ordered you to do certain thing's that no one else had to, doing everybody else laundry, extra studies, outside tuition and even excluding you from certain family function.

He knew you weren't strong enough to be a vigilante, that's why the rest of your siblings have a hard time being near you... Your life were different. You were just too 'odd' to be include as a family to them.

"I never knew how much it hurt her..."

You could barely hold back your tears sometimes, everyone get the idle father but to you he was never a father he was just an instructor... Who clearly have favourite.

"I told Alfred to stop making food for her... To learn how to survive on her own, she was already weak I thought I was helping her survive"

You would stood there your eyes looking into the abyss, everyone had their plate on the table yet yours was missing. They did not asked or have a single concern as they happily ate their meal... As your flesh began to decay.

Every Christmas you were gone nowhere to be seen but everyone carried on their life like you were never there at the first place.

Your bones were crushed, your blood being drained slowly as their smile and laughter taunt you.

Why? Why would you ever missed something you never had?

You've spent your whole life without them. Why would you suddenly need them, they were heros... They were obliged to love everyone but you were being singled out.

"I don't know why she didn't scream when they dunk her head into the water"

The brutal scene of your death, some thugs decided to kidnapped you for money but when they realised your family nor the bats were coming they used you to fulfill twisted dreams.

Your wrist was red and some soft skin were pelling off. Tears, sweat and snot on your face as you begged God to save you.

Tim got kidnapped before and he was saved before an hour.. You've been down here for six hours, bruised and broken.

You thought for once that your family would show some mercy and come but they didn't, left you behind in the hands of two merciless people.

For six hour straight you've been beaten, they dunked your head into some cold water and before you could passed out and just let go they would pull your head back.

Your clothes were torn and dirty, your body was aching and there was a fine line of cut on your neck as blood wouldn't stop spewing out of it. Your fingers were mostly broken and you're been hit with a rench which left your jaw broken and your head bleeding.

"Dad...I, mis-ed u..."

You could barely speak but you used the bit of your strength on calling for your father, for him to embrace you in your dying moment... That's what you've wanted for a long time .

Memories flash across your mind as your breath began to slow down. You've watched alot of movies, you always wanted your father to pick you up into the sky and told you that he loved you.

The way a father would look at their daughter and be proud of. Everybody had a father by their side growing up atleast in your eyes, the one to hold their hands while they cheer, the one to embrace them when they accomplish even the smallest of thing.

But, he was never a present father to you. Ever award you won the only thing you care for was your father, you looked into the crowd of faces to see his proud face or just him but he wasn't there.

Unlike everyone else who had a father holding their hands to guide them through the darkness you only had yourself. Every compliment felt meaningless and every compliment was replaced with untold hatred.

"I couldn't stop myself that day... I hold onto her and cried. My baby was dead"

He continued as his face show a slight sorrow but he was holding it back.

"My child, my little angel... Lifeless on the dirty street left there to be eaten by the rats... I couldn't control my tears, so many word left untold... So many praise I've kept to myself, she died thinking she was a burden."

His voice cracked as his throat began to heat up from the emotion he was trying to surpass.

Your body was left at some nearby alleyway, you were still concious when they throw your body onto the cold cement. The light of the city blended in your eyes, you lay there paralyzed soaking wet from your blood.

It was cold and empty, trying to imagine the warmth of your father, but you couldn't...You didn't know how it felt to be under a father warmth. You never had that.

All those years filled with unsaid words and tension between the two of you. You couldn't speak and he didn't knew how to care for you. You watched as he would nurture all your siblings buy you.

Every birds by his side cuddling and loving while your feathers began to fall to warmth your heart, to play the role of being loved. You sacrifice your own greatness for fatherly love.

"Her body was cold and empty, not the girl I watched grew up... Her blood were warm, like she was trying to comfort me for the last time..."

Bruce looked at his hands as he looked back at the guy, he recoll running towards the scene, pushing the GCPD aside when they tried to stop him... But a father could never be stopped when their child is at stake.

He saw your body near the trash, they threw you away like you didn't meant anything but a trash to be taken out after it was done with.

He went on his knees as he dirty his perfect suit, his hands holding onto your body as he began to sob... Your face have went pale and he could see the damage done to your jaw and the large bruise on your left eye.

The bruise was swollen, purple and red colouring it... Seemed like they had hit you with something hard.

"Whoever killed her treated her no different from an animal. I hold onto her hands, I prayed to God to do something... I was... Late, too late to be a father to her."

"I ruined a beautiful angel... I wasn't a father... I treated her differently... I was too sucked up to understand that she needed a father and not Bruce..."

"I just, hoped that no father would do this to their child... She was my child, my angel, my baby... And I would die to bring her back and told her... I love you always"

I know this is shittu but im bored.

[starredblood]

NOWHERE GIRL

CHAPTER SIX

kang sae-byeok x fem!reader

synopsis: you confront your classmate, determined to make her ex leave you alone.

wc. 1.7k

warnings: none

(nowhere girl masterlist)

When you got kicked out of your house you only had time to bring a few sets of clothes, your toothbrush, and your school supplies. While you were getting ready this morning, you had to watch a video tutorial online on how to tie your hair up with a pencil not minding the tall short haired girl who was eating breakfast just a few feet away in their tight knit apartment.

It was easy not to talk to Sae-byeok. She was like smoke, easy to spot but can’t grasp as it’s already dissolving away. She left ten minutes earlier than you did without a single uttering to you. You try not to think about it too much because you will be gone soon.

“Noona.” you hear a voice behind you peep while you were done tying your hair back. Cheol pops up from his room, handing you his tie timidly. “I accidentally loosened my tie. Could you tie it for me again?”

You walk over to Cheol and kneel on the hardwood floor to help adjust his uniform tie.

“Did someone hurt you?” he asks, pointing at your cheek.

“No, never. I just tripped.” you lie. You feel the weight of his stare on your bruised up cheek. “Do you always go to school by yourself?” you say to advert the topic.

“Yes. Sometimes my sister takes me if she doesn’t go to work early but she usually does.” he explains, rubbing his tired little eyes with his fist. “Ji-yeong noona isn’t a morning person so I’m scared to ask her.”

“Done. You look nice.” you ruffle the top of his head and stand up. “I would be scared to wake up Ji-yeong too by the way.”

A fatigue little giggle escapes Cheol’s mouth.

“Have a good day at school, Cheol.” you say and walk over to the door to slip on your sneakers only to look over at Cheol who pokes his head out his room once more.

“Are you staying with us forever, Noona?” he asks. The confused expression you gave him startled him. “I want you to!”

“No, I know what you meant to say it’s just—“ you scratch the top of your head. You don’t think it’ll be appropriate to say that tomorrow morning you’ll be long gone to a sensitive boy like Cheol. “I don’t know actually. Maybe one day I’ll have to leave but we’ll still be friends, okay?”

“Seriously?”

“Absolutely. Maybe in the summer you can come visit me at the art gallery I work at.”

“That’ll be cool.” he says quietly. “Bye, Noona.”

You wave him goodbye and exit the apartment.

The bus ride to your campus is serene on this cloudy spring morning and you wonder when this moment of calm will end. Maybe it’ll end when you get to your first class of the day where you will confront Yoon about her ex-boyfriend’s attempted assault on you yesterday.

✿・・───・・✦・・───・・✿

One thing Sae-byeok had to get used to was having a routine. Before working at the bakery, her days of pickpocketing were irregular and her income would be inconsistent. It was strange at first and she wasn’t the best on arriving to work on time at first, but by some miracle Miss Ahn never complained about her tardiness. Sae-byeok is almost certain Ji-yeong told her about her past so Miss Ahn could take it easy on her.

Her first month working at the bakery she didn’t think she would last. She was told to memorize kneading techniques, how to spot expired flour, and go grocery shopping in the middle of a rush because they ran out of eggs. It was all too foreign. But now she can barely remember her life without this job. However, today her mind is back to the days she used to be Jang Deok-su’s little apprentice. Everyday was violence, theft, drugs, and more violence. Sae-byeok can’t believe she survived it all.

For her midday break, Sae-byeok stepped outside to the back alley of the bakery and leaned her back against the wall to ponder some more.

“Hey, Kang!” Ahn Yong-sun, Miss Ahn’s eldest grandson, calls out to her from the back door. She slowly turns her head to look at him. “Where the fuck did you put Kim Yeoreum’s cake order? I can’t fucking find it anywhere!”

“On the top shelf! Asshole.” she mutters the last word underneath her breath.

“Just because you’re two inches taller than me doesn’t mean we can all fucking reach the top shelf!”

“Yong-sun, watch your mouth child!” Miss Ahn hisses as she arrived back from her grocery errands. She fans her grandson with her hands in a shooing motion. He mumbles an apology and cowers back inside but not before throwing Sae-byeok a glare. “Don’t let that brat get into your head, dear. He’s become so spoiled—of course he has, he was raised by my own spoiled son!”

Sae-byeok reaches over to grab her bag of groceries.

“Ah, look at you always being so attentive with me.” Miss Ahn coos. “I’m telling you if I fell down the stairs my grandson wouldn’t even bat an eye.”

They enter the kitchen and the aroma of fresh bread hits their nostrils. As Sae-byeok reaches over to shut the door for some odd reason the smell makes her think of you and the croissant you offered her last night. While she unloads the bag of groceries she keeps thinking of you and the last thing you told her last night.

Sae-byeok turns to peer down at the elder lady beside her jotting down another list of groceries. “Miss.” she says out of the blue.

“Yes, dear?”

“Is the apartment above the bakery still vacant?”

Miss Ahn’s looks up past her reading glasses and raises a brow. “Why? Did you and Cheol get booted off?”

“No, it’s for a friend.”

“Ah.” she hums and continues to write her list again. “I’m in the process of having a couple of people visit the space. However, it’ll make my life easier if you got your friend to come first—just make sure she doesn’t ask too many questions. You young kids love doing that.”

“Okay. Can she come tomorrow?”

Sae-byeok could sense that the older lady is skeptical. But she remains stone faced and calm hoping that she won’t raise further questions. It’s bad enough she’s doing this for your sake.

“I don’t see why not. Tomorrow afternoon.” she pats her on the shoulder. “Now, can you help me finish icing this cake for me? The customer will arrive later today.”

Sae-byeok walks around the other side of the island counter and sneakily pulls out her phone to send Ji-yeong a message.

✿・・───・・✦・・───・・✿

You drop your belongings at your usual spot, next to the large window panes in the studio and march over to Yoon who was currently chatting with a friend. Without noticing, your jaw clenches seeing how content Yoon looks giggling with her friend while your mind is in torment over the chaos that ensued yesterday.

When she sees your rigid figure march up to her she hushedly says something to her friend that made her go silent. She avoids your eye contact the closer you approach them.

“Can I talk to you in private?” you ask her, irritated.

Yoon stiffly nods while still avoiding your intense eye contact and follows you out the classroom. When you reach the end of the hall you cross your arms and narrow your eyes at her.

“So—“

“I’m really sorry.” Yoon interrupts quickly with guilt written all over her face. “I didn’t think Yen-ho would…”

“Try to beat me up?” you scoff.

“I was just confused about this whole situation an—“

“Situation? This isn’t a situation, Yoon this is my life! I get it if you don’t want to be around me anymore. It fucking sucks that I know what you will decide but to go around and tell people…” you choke back tears. “it’s just making my life harder than it already is.”

“Fuck. I’m so deeply sorry.”

Breathless with anger you take a couple of seconds to compose yourself before continuing. “Whatever, Yoon. Could you just tell me if he’ll be here today so I know when to leave?”

“He doesn’t go to school here he just likes to wander.” she mutters. “But I’ll text him—tell him to back off.”

Before you could speak your professor appears. “Ladies, class is starting now could you head to your seats please. And can I speak to you after class about your project?” he points at you.

“Yes, I’m sorry.” you mumble, lowering you head and scurry with Yoon to the class.

“Don’t apologize.” he chuckles.

It was hard to pay attention in class when all you could do is shoot daggers at Yoon across the room. You could see the anxiousness in her behavior, how she would pick up and put down her phone, and only reply to her friends in short sentences.

At one point you heard the professor cough in your direction leaving you no choice but to try and concertante on the piece you are working on. But by the time class was finished, you barely finished what you started with.

You wait until everyone leaves before dragging your feet up to the professors desk.

He greets you by your name and folds his hands, thinking deeply. “So, you’re the only one that hasn’t shown me their piece. Could you show me and explain to me what your piece is about?”

“It’s a textile piece that will, um, resemble a fashion designers sketchbook. I’m using textile, watercolor, fashion magazines, and my own sketch designs for this piece…” you quietly explain as you show him the piece, frowning at the disapproval on his face.

“That sounds…marvelous.” he says to your surprise. “I like the use of watercolor to depict paper fading yellow.”

“Thank you, professor.” you bow.

“Is there a story behind this?”

“I’m still trying to get around it.”

“Okay.” he hums. “Recently, I’ve noticed your lack of concentration in my class however. I stated from the start that students that consistently keep lacking won’t succeed in my class. This is the first big project and you will have two bigger ones these next upcoming weeks. I don’t want you to fall behind already—especially since I can already conclude that you’ll be one of the runner ups in the Hangaram prize.”

Your heart begins to swell. This is the first good news in a while you aren’t sure how to react. So you just stare at your professor with wide eyes and a gaped mouth.

“So please, focus on this project and I am excited to see the end results next class.”

“Of course, thank you professor!”

You walk out of class in high spirits only to be crushed with the realization in knowing that a potential group of loiterers are waiting for you outside these walls.

🏷️: @monroesturnns @knfthxv @jumpedthenfell-13 @peelover25 @karli6 @kissedberries @bitchybananaflower @laurenkenss

[twoidiotwriters1]

Chapter 30. Peach Blossoms

Summary: Benedict can't help the flustered, almost schoolboy manner in which he reacts. Masterlist Previous Chapter // Next Chapter Words: 2,330 Listen to: 'Staring' -by Tipling Rock A/N: Bitches can't be left alone for two seconds i swear -Danny

Last night, Genovians were surprised by the arrival of two foreigners from the rainy lands of Britain at our masquerade ball. 

Benedict and Eloise Bridgerton, brother and sister of British noble blood and close friends with the Princesses (so much so that Mr Bridgerton was Princess Y/N's arts tutor during her season abroad), are to stay with the royal family, leaving us to wonder, is a union between nations happening soon? 

-Elsie Penworthy for the Genovian Daily Gazette, June 1816

Benedict is glad a servant came to find them, otherwise, they would've gotten lost in the hallways until noon. His sister immediately rushes into the room to sit next to Marie and serves herself a generous meal. She doesn't seem to care if her manners are lacking, but that's alright, because the rest of the people around the table are messier than she could ever be.

The twins are seated at the far end, books spread about their plates and drinks, notes and ink scattered on the table as they distractedly shovel food into their mouths. Their clothes are dishevelled as much as their light-brown hair, their hazel eyes are bleary, showing signs of discomfort caused by the drinks from the night prior.

Marie and Eloise gossip about the geniuses in attendance at the ball, no doubt judging overheard comments or costume choices, and next to them, Y/N is listening with a sleepy smile. Benedict is almost sure that she, like him, couldn't rest until hours after going to bed, the incoming avalanche of problems making a mess of their minds.

The parents are nowhere to be seen, and as the group greets him with different levels of enthusiasm, he blurts out the question: "Are the queen and king not joining us?"

"They were up and about earlier than us," you gesture at the chair in front of you, inviting him to sit. "Such is the life of the crown."

"You don't see them much, then?"

"We see them at dinner every day," Marie responds. "Y/N sees them more now that she's started her practicum with Mother."

"Have you started preparations?" A proud smile forms on Benedict's face. "And how are you finding it?"

"Quite rewarding," you admit in a satisfied tone. "I could almost dare to claim I'm a natural."

"You are a natural," Rowan says from the far end of the table. "Born for it and everything, providence granted you the skill to overcome the challenge."

You blush, burying your face behind a glass of juice. "Nonsense."

"I agree entirely with your brother," Benedict says sweetly, wanting to gift you praises for as long as he's still around to give them. After that, he turns to the twins. "Why are you so far away?"

"Mother forbade them to sit near us when they bring their research—sometimes they set small explosions."

"Except during dinner," Richard smiles innocently. "Last time we compromised a perfectly cooked turkey. It broke our hearts."

"Are you joining us later, brother?" Eloise asks, moving past the information as if she's already gotten used to the twins' peculiarities. "We're going to the lake."

"Am I invited?" He asks, pulling a plate to serve himself breakfast. "If you're including me out of pity, I beg you not. I'll be perfectly content exploring the castle—that is, if I'm allowed." He adds promptly, not wanting to sound like he's taking liberties in your home.

"You certainly are, but the plan wasn't just for us ladies," you reply amicably. "I was going to take Reaper for a ride; he gets stressed after the parade, and I like to race about to release the tension."

"Reaper?" Benedict grins. "Your black horse's name is Reaper?"

"Grim Reaper. She is quite the comedian," Marie comments, pulling a bowl of cream closer.

"You could join me," you continue unbothered. "I had intended to ask you in London, but time slipped by and I never got the chance."

Benedict can't help the flustered, almost schoolboy manner in which he reacts. He lets out a pleased little laugh, lowers his gaze, and scratches behind his ear. "Would I have to handle Reaper?"

"Sadly, my horse doesn't take kindly to other people handling him. You wish to ride on the back and hold my waist?" You reply jokingly, expecting him to deny any wishes to get nearer than is proper. 

Instead, his eyes narrow with a hint of challenge, and he responds in a carefree voice as he reaches for a glass. "I wouldn't mind it. You're a fine rider, after all."

You choke in response. Marie and the twins share a bemused glance before pretending not to be listening to the conversation. "P-Pardon?"

"I've seen you ride a horse plenty of times, I know you're good at it," he clarifies with a teasing glint in his eyes.

"Yes, of course," you clear your throat, fighting off lewd memories.

Once at the lake, Benedict sits on a blanket and sketches while the girls splash around the shore, chasing each other and laughing in quite an unladylike manner. Peach blossoms around the lake give the scene an ethereal air, a sight that reminds him of home. The thought makes him stop drawing and begin writing a letter to his mother back in England.

Dear Mother—and Anthony, if he's there,

Eloise and I have reconnected with the princesses, and we are now enjoying the incredible privilege of spending the summer at their castle. My sister is beyond herself with the seemingly endless amenities, and she's made friends with several people, not just the royal family, though the princes seem quite fond of her—and before any of you get any ideas, I assure you it is all platonic. The twins are married to their branches of study and have little time to concern themselves with matters of the heart.

Speaking of... I know neither of you will like it, but it is quite noticeable that Eloise has fallen in love with this land and is probably not going to give it up easily, if ever. If I may speak on her behalf, I have hardly seen more accomplished women in any other place than here, and happier, too.

She would be safe and accompanied—the princes and Princess Marie are students at the College and will continue to be for at least another four and two years respectively—and I know my sister would not waste her time if allowed to explore beyond the restraints of our society's limitations.

Women rule the most powerful countries in our world—is it really that impossible to believe that our El might be a genius in the making? I have chosen to believe in her; I hope you do too. 

Hugs and kisses,

Benedict.

After two hours of sketching together and dipping your toes in the water, you take Benedict to the stables to familiarise with Reaper. The imposing stallion huffs and puffs when the man approaches, and you find it amusing how such a large man recoils at the sight of a horse you treat like a baby.

"He's testing you, but he won't hurt you. Right, Reaper?" You speak to the horse in a sweet voice.

"How did you end up riding this creature?" Benedict asks in a mix of awe and trepidation. "You're the size of his neck!"

"That is an exaggeration," you state patiently, "Reaper was born from my mother's horse, Baby."

"The one she was riding during the parade?"

"The very same," you smile, "she's had her since she was sixteen or so."

"And I suppose it's the same with you and er, Reaper?" He continues, keeping his distance.

"I got him when I turned ten," you explain, feeding him sugar cubes. "He's very loving and playful, but gets fussy when someone else tries to ride him. One time, Arthur tried to take the reins, you know, doing the gentlemanly thing, and Reaper almost killed him."

"Right," he says, looking at the horse hesitantly. "Well, is he willing to let me sit on the back?"

"You'll have to ask him," you say teasingly, stretching out a hand. "Come closer."

Benedict obeys, feeling safer with you than if he were to deal with the creature by himself. You steer him closer while petting the horse's mane, maintaining eye contact with Benedict as you do. When you guide his hand to the animal's muzzle, it feels strangely intimate. He dares to run one hand over Reaper, and the way you look at him as he leans in to kiss the horse and praise him makes the initial apprehension vanish entirely. 

Benedict feels ten times taller now, manlier even, which feels odd coming from an action so tender. You get on your horse, holding the reins steady while Benedict pulls himself up against you, confidently wrapping his arms around your waist. "Ready?"

Benedict smiles, squeezing you affectionately. "Never."

"Tell me," you begin while setting a good pace for Reaper, "how's Britain?"

"Less cloudy since you left—yet somehow less colourful for the same reason."

"Flatterer." You're glad that he can see your face. "And your family?"

"Colin and Penelope have received their firstborn. Francesca and John are somewhere in Scotland, being utterly happy in silence, I imagine."

"Do you miss them?"

"Interesting question," he tilts his head. "I'm accustomed, I guess, to seeing my siblings married off."

"But it hasn't been that long since they started to leave! Your sister Daphne got married... what was it, three years ago?"

"Was it really?" He narrows his eyes in thought. "Funny. Feels like she's always been married to Simon."

"When I was little, thinking about my siblings getting married used to make me cry."

"And now?"

"Now I think they'll never marry," you laugh. "Rowan and Richard love science and dedicate all their time to it. I hope it makes them happy forever, if that's what they've chosen. Marie... well, she cannot make up her mind, she's had plenty of beaus, and has all the freedom in the world to pick whoever she desires, but I believe that—"

"That same freedom is keeping her undecisive?" Benedict finishes with a grin. "I've heard that before."

"It feels like I'll have them forever."

"I wouldn't be so sure," Benedict hums. "Three years ago, I was 27 and felt like it would take ages before anyone decided to leave the nest. Now, three of my younger siblings are married, my oldest brother has a child, and Eloise... well, she's not going to stay after this summer. A lot can happen when you least expect it."

"Well, one thing is certain," you sigh, "no matter what, everyone always ends where they're meant to be."

"Eloise's departure might sting more than I'm willing to admit, though," he reveals bashfully, chuckling weakly. "She's the only one in my family who understands what it's like to be... different."

You hum, carefully moving through the subject. "Does she know about... You know, your preferences?"

"God, no! And she does not need to. That's private."

"I know my sister's previous partners," you shrug. "We don't share everything in explicit detail, but we like talking about it. It's liberating."

"I can talk to my brothers about the women I've been with, but it's a whole different thing to speak about the men. I don't want them to see me differently."

"Do you think they'll react negatively?"

"Yes," he shakes his head, keeping one arm around your waist while his free hand rubs his thigh. "No. I... I don't know. I want to believe they would love me no matter what."

Benedict leans back when you look over your shoulder briefly to face him. "I think they do love you like that, Ben. What we like or don't like doesn't make us. What we are is what we do."

"In that case, they don't have much to love," he says in a self-deprecating manner.

"I disagree." You make your horse advance more into the thick forest area. "Eloise told me your career has been rather prolific in the last six months."

"Is that all I am, then? My career?" He slides off the horse as soon as you reach your arranged destination.

You raise a brow, following him with your gaze. "Is there something else you'd like to be?"

"I'd like to be left alone," he says defensively.

You tense. "I apologise."

Benedict makes a face and turns to look at you. "I do not mean... I've had this conversation many times before with fellow artists and..."

"And?" You dismount Reaper.

Benedict watches your graceful landing with utter focus before responding. "And it goes nowhere. Half of them see art as a hobby, something to waste their time in, to pay for their vices... The ones that share my opinion are all about ambition and merit... But I just want it to mean something. Art is the haven to a very fragile part of my soul."

You tie Reaper's reins to a tree, smiling as you do. "I'm glad to hear you haven't turned your back on your haven since I left, then. Does it make you truly happy?"

Benedict laughs. "I suffer greatly, which is almost the same."

"You sound passionate indeed." You remove your gloves and put them in the saddlebag. "Which can be painfully blissful. Or is it blissfully painful? Either way, it comes with being a true artist, I think."

"It comes with being in love," he says earnestly. "I suppose I am happy. I'm thinking of trying abstract techniques for my future pieces. You seemed to think my dove was quite the artwork."

"You'll have something new to teach me, then," you smile, moving closer.

"Teach you?" Benedict raises a brow, highly aware of each of your movements. "Am I still your tutor?"

"I don't remember dismissing you. Do you?"

"Not quite," he hums, eyes flickering to your mouth. "But I don't remember agreeing to be your guest of honour either, so memory is failing me lately." He fixes his gaze on yours, a small, teasing smile on his face. "In any case, one can't teach the abstract, it is as your imagination makes it."

"Benedict Bridgerton," you stand right in front of him, "it sounds like a style made for you."

"And you."

"Not in the least. But being around you feels that way sometimes." You soften your voice on purpose. "If our former agreement is afoot, would you kiss me right this moment?"

"I live to serve," he mumbles, cupping your face and closing the distance.

Next Chapter –>

Taglist.

@cokamarie24 @babypink224221 @Booknerdlife @djsporks @lght-roastcoffee @marii-ren @mythical-goth @omgsuperstarg @creepytoes88 @sarahskywalker-amidala @23victoria @shadowolf993 @squirreljoe @syxtiramishuui @stargirl-mayaa @dolllol2405 @aemondslove @inspiringwaves @optimisticsandwichgladiator @alloof @sydney-m @sirivusblack @mimibookish @marvelouslyme96 @imaginexred @black-kitten-imagines @bands-tv-movies-is-me @justanotherkpopstanlol @Nala @whatasadlittlelife @blkmystery @spiderbunny-13 @sky0401 @chxosunbound @lenobubbles @sunflower-liz @bakugotypecrashout @misshale21

[lani-heart]

|| series masterlist || ACT II PREVIEW // previously

parings -> riki nishimura x readerg enre -> non-idol au, school au, hyrbid au warnings -> neglectment / rejection word count -> 1k

abstract -> sometimes certain sacrifices have to be made.

y/n's perspective

The party was fine… despite our hybrids glaring at each of us. Karina was his hybrid who… didn’t like me. While Niki… looked like he wanted to jump my new fake boyfriend at any moment. 

Our parents thought it was a good idea because they thought we were a little too close to them. What I didn’t know was that he was in a relationship with his hybrid. We were both the same, and we’d both have to lie for the time being so our hybrids wouldn’t get the treatment we feared.

“I was thinking of having her join those classes!” he said and she scoffed. “I don’t think you should. I didn’t want Niki to but he begged for them” I explained and he nodded. “Yeah, listen to your shiny new girlfriend,” she scoffed, and he sighed. 

She had every right to be angry… but I didn’t want to be physically involved with him. 

“y/nnie I wanna go home” Niki begged and I did too but we had a quota to finish before leaving. “I do too!” Karina also added to her owner and I chuckled. 

“Hey, Niki? Should we go to the street market after?” I ask and his eyes light up. 

“Do you really need to ask?” he said happily as Karina was now trying to be comforted by her owner. “Do… you have to fake date that guy?” he asked and I sighed. 

“Niki… my parents want to set me up in an arranged marriage,” I said and he stopped walking to look at me. “W-what?” he asked and I sighed. “At first they wanted me to marry Hyunsuk, but he refused thankfully and then he rebelled so they dropped it for a bit. But… They wanted me to start dating friends and they gave me this huge list of boys to see if I got along with them.” I confessed and he looked… upset. “Of course I said no,” I said and he nodded as he hugged me tightly. 

“He was one of them… but it seems like we have a similar situation to him. There are rumors about him, and how he’s in a relationship with his cat hybrid Karina '' I said and he hummed. 

“Trust me… I won’t let them actually marry me off. I plan to stall until I have my own income and then, you and me!” I said and he chuckled. “We should live in Japan,” he offered. 

“We should! Then we’d be free to do what we wanted” 

niki’s perspective

She wasn’t kidding when she said she got a list. 

Hyunsuk, Junghwan, Chenle, Seonghwa, so many but I also know some of them would never agree which meant she would choose and her parents would handle it. 

I wonder… What would happen if we ran away like Hyunsuk’s sister?

While looking through her messages with her mom about this stupid arranged marriage… I saw something. “You’re planning on studying abroad?” I am now excited to see Kyoto University as her option with her mom. She smiled… “Snooping now aren’t you?” she teased and I chuckled. 

“Yeah… Chenle was telling me how his friend is currently in China and how it was a good break for her. Especially since she’s an art student, she’s getting over the artist block and I thought… this would be a good way to avoid the rumors and dating situation to get out of hand” she said and I grinned. 

“Where should we go first?” I asked and she chuckled. “Hmm… we have a lot to do there don’t we?” she asked and I nodded. 

This was different from visiting Japan with her parents… we had no supervision and could go anywhere without being asked where. 

“I do want to do some shopping in Shibuya, '' she said and I chuckled. “I want to go to Akihabara! We have to see what cafes have events soon!” 

We were finishing up this semester early so we could have a head start in Japan. So this was my last etiquette class… I wanted to say bye to Jake but I don’t know what happened for him not to show up. 

“That dog stole your coat, you know?” I heard and saw the bird. My coat that I left? “He also ran… not like I blame him,” he said. “Hybrids have chips though–” “They do… but you can easily cut them out” he explained and I sighed. Hybrids who ran away often were found easily… someone could report it. 

“I don’t think he’ll last that long. They’ll find him easily” he added and I wondered… “Why didn’t you snitch?” I asked and he scoffed. “If I could run, I would too…” he said as he went to his seat by himself. He’d run away too? 

It sometimes made me realize… the hybrids here, the majority, were miserable. Under either adoption programs or… rich kids with too much money. 

Jay was a bird hybrid… exotic here for Korea often found in North America. Some hybrids were happy… but most were miserable. Jay and Sunoo were examples that I knew of… the bird hybrid has a reputation of being a good and responsible hybrid but never could stay with an owner for more than a few months. He was a free trial hybrid so others could see what they wanted in a hybrid to have a reference and then dispose of him. 

Whilst Sunoo was a popular hybrid known for his looks but also for how fidgety the fox was… his owner was one that I hated. When we were younger we often talked and got along but with how his owner became more and more bitchy y/n no longer associated herself with her and so I never talked to him again. 

Even Jake I guess… he was so desperate that he must've been given bad news. 

It made me feel guilty at times but it wasn’t my fault I was given someone who actually cared about me. 

“Stop that before I tell your owners!” the professor said as she scolded a group of hybrids throwing stuff at the deer hybrid on the other side. “His antlers are in the way!” Sunghoon said… he’s another example of a miserable hybrid. 

“Idiots” I heard as I saw the black cat hybrid who always sat in front of me say bored out of his mind. 

Maybe… I just quit these classes?

ttaglist -> @ilovecheese09 @gudkc @nikisvanillaccola @blossominghunnie @mheretoreadff @k1ttylvr @starzniiky @kibs-and-bits @b3tt7boop @in-somnias-world @lol6sposts @xiaoderrrr @jihyosgfremade @b-a-nshee-blog @mimisamisasa @katsukis1wife @eggomi @thunderous-wolf @tinyteezer

please don't be a silent reader !! reblog, comment, and like <3

[flamigoat]

🎁✨💖

Wanted to do a little screenshot redraw for my girl Rabbid Peach! Love this sketch. She came out so cute!! The silly. New profile picture might be incoming….😆

Y’know, I’ve never had a favorite character like this before. Just seeing and creating art for her makes me so so happy. I love her so much guys. She’s just so funny and it always makes me smile!! I’ve gotta get her figures and replay the Mario + Rabbids series sometime soon. 💖

[ninakoll]

long post incoming!! thank you all for your support and love, i've been having a lot of fun sharing my art on here this past year. i've especially enjoyed drawing enstars dreams, i have some more in the works :D and thanks for all the laughs too!! let's hope 2025 is kinder to you all in the world. please take care, everyone!! 💜

👇 i'm also answering some asks before the year ends !!! 👁️_👁️ 👇 some drawn, some text!

@kyokills YES!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE SO RIGHT!! i really like the role anzu played in the anime; her bond with trickstar is so sweet 😭😭. but imagine you go to school and have to be a producer/manager for so many units, then eichi makes that huge company and you get even more units to handle and make outfits for among all other things, also this one other producer weirdo in eden might be plotting to kill you sometimes? all this while you try to keep some kid who sometimes is possessed by the ghost of his sister from exploding and some weirdo named gatekeeper is gatekeeping your future ig. and on top if it all the game has the phonecall feature which scares me every time and this was a recent phonecall i saw. let anzu say fuck off in 2025!!!!

i DO love their dynamic so much!! the way ibara will never forgive yuzuru for something that was completely inevitable... OOOGGG. i am plotting a short comic about ibayuzu soon, for now have this screenshot of ibara going out of his way to be mean... stay tuned 2025...!!!

my overthinking ass has been sitting on this one for a while. is it ok to say thank you ?!!

@alchemial WAA thank you, i will immediately use my newfound voice for evil. all of crazy:b already failed step one of "never be a loser" and they will never recover 😢

this is the highest praise one can achieve ;_;. i hope my art and comics can keep cheering you up forever!! 😭😭😭 ill keep drawing!

🇪🇪 JEEE mega et arvustuse kirjutasid ja osalesid, see on tähtis!! jalg ukse vahele saada ja midagi sellist enda jaoks ära teha on ülihea; eriti kui see oli raske ülesanne. see on tõesti väga naljakas et see tuli selline riburada juhtumeid; alustades zine tõlkest ja lõpuks müürilehe võistluses osalemisega:D tubli oled!!

HIII ANON SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO RESPOND 😭😭😭 YOURE SO SWEEET AAAAAA im a lil speechless!!! but i'm so happy to hear you made it through finals and made it back home; your dad sounds like a complete sweetheart!! ;_; thank you so much for your support and love, so glad you enjoyed the Kohaku study drawing 🫶🫶🫶 hope you had a wonderful end of the year and that you have a safe and fun new years!! 💫💫💫

thank you all once again!! mwah mwah mwah mwah

[grayscaleearts]

I love your palia oc Sol! and I LOVEEE the artwork you did of them in palia's artstyle! really looks like official art, if you ever had commissions opened I'd love to see my character in your art (obviously not pushing if you don't do comms or anything!)

just wanted to say I love the artwork and wanted to ask if you had any headcanons/lore for your character? I don't know if I do for mine, but I love peoples creativity and when they can give a story to their oc's/game characters ^-^

omg, thank you so much!! It's made me so happy how positively people have reacted to my attempt at the palia artstyle, this community has been so welcoming and supportive of the art I've made and i genuinely love it so much. I actually made a commission sheet for palia style pieces a while back, so I may post it here on tumblr some time soon! I've actually recently updated that art, since it was the first art I ever drew of them before having a concrete design idea for them:

As for the second part, I've actually put quite a lot of thought into their character, so heres some info about them under a read more :D (also for anyone interested in character plots, the plot I have uploaded to the tour board as Sol Reagem is my original plot, but it also doubles as what Sol's actual home looks like!)

- when they first emerged they were very curious to learn as much as they could about the world around them, and spent a lot of their time talking with Ashura and Chayne asking questions, and just talking and befriending villagers in general. They also spent probably an equal amount of time exploring the world around them (and almost immediately discovering some of the not so legal goings on of the underground). As they start to get a better grasp and establish themself more in the village, they still end up spending most of their time socializing when they can (and more often than not they're either hanging around the Inn or at Jel's shop!) - their main skills are in foraging and cooking, which is quite fitting that two of the people they become closest to are Ashura and Reth. They sell a lot of forage and wood as their primary income, but they really enjoy making extra food to be able to share with company. They also have a tendency to chopping wood to help clear their mind, (if youve seen the tumblr post you know LOL) - they have absolutely no memory of pre void, and never will gain it back. Those memories are permanently lost to time, and its something they're glad for - for the most part. Sometimes at first they do struggle with not having any memories or life experiences outside of Kilima and Bahari, but with time they find family and new memories in the people there :) they consider Ashura a father figure, and ask him to be their Shepp when the time comes for it. - they actually have a little runt palcat named Leaf! She's smaller than usual palcats (and her ears are pretty large looking because of it!) and she LOVES to hunt bugs. I jokingly call her the Village emotional support palcat, since Sol will bring her into town pretty frequently, and often leaves her with someone if they need a little cheering up or comfort.

Thank you for being interested in them :D!! i love when people ask, it makes me so happy to share bc i always put so much thought into my characters

[the-cimmerians]

It is that time of year again. I have reached out to the families on my list to gather girl scouts to purchase cookies from. Please consider choosing a trans girl scout to get your cookies from this year - the kids are under attack this year more than ever, so lets give them some joy.

Note: When purchasing from one of these trans girl scouts, please choose the “ship the cookies” option and not the “deliver the cookies” by hand option.

With no further adieu, here are the scouts! Please check back as many more often request to be added after publication, and I will keep this post updated with any that join in:

Dotty: Dotty is a trans Girl Scout who is a born entrepreneur and cares a lot about helping aquatic animals. You can buy cookies from her here!

Ryan: Ryan is a trans Girl Scout who is part of an inclusive troop that has helped create a safe space for all kids. You can buy cookies from her here!

Candor: Candor is a nonbinary Girl Scout participating in their 10th cookie season to raise funds for their Gold Award. You can get cookies from Candor here!

Joshua: Joshua is a trans Girl Scout thriving with her troop and who really appreciated all of the orders last year and hopes the internet wants more cookies in 2024. You can get cookies from her here!

Em: Em is a nonbinary girl scout who is looking to fund a trip to Savannah, GA as well as planning activities with their community nursing home. You can get cookies from Em here!

Lily: Lily is a trans girl scout. She and her LGBTQ+ friendly troop are hoping to earn enough money to go on an overnight adventure at SeaWorld! They will also use the troop funds to pay for yearly dues so our low income families won't have to worry about that additional fund with Girl Scouting. You can get cookies from her here!

Logan: Logan, who sometimes goes by Rapunzel, is a trans girl scout looking to earn money for craft supplies and to replace camping supplies that burned in a fire. You can buy cookies from her here!

Gabby: Gabby is a trans girl scout who plans to use the money to support her troop’s camping trip this year! You can buy cookies from her here!

Ash: Ash is a nonbinary scout looking to pay for summer camp and service projects! You can get cookies from Ash here!

Logan: Logan is a 7 year old trans girl scout full of glitter and sunshine. She’s raising money to fund the first camping trip for her troop: You can find her cookies here!

Olivia: Olivia is a trans girl scout that loves all things ocean, especially mermaids, and is excited to earn her pets, bugs, and arts and crafts badges soon! You can get cookies from her here!

Brie and Lexie’s Troop: This trans-affirming troop has several members that can be on this list. They work every year to make sure everyone is supported and loved. Instead of posting individual links, they have a page that goes to the full troop’s catalog.

[draculadailydrinks]

Days 4-7

So.

Did not expect this week to be as hectic (school...) but I still got to make the drinks and have a draft sit for a while until I was caught up with today's and update the photos for today's drink and meal-

Hope you enjoy!

5/7

Blood orange rooibos tea

As I drank the tea, it became more orange. I'm not sure if the juice from the orange came out or if the orange slices inside absorbed the tea.

Lack of update of the 6th did get slightly worrying especially because the contents of the letter Mr. Hawkins have given to Johnathan's. Sir what do you mean he's a "substitute" for what and how did Hawkins even get out there was that in condition to Johnathan coming? Fresh blood???

Also the fact Johnathan spent two paragraphs describing the Count was certainly something. Those were very specific descriptions.

5/8

The drink was vaguely red colored paint water in front of me since spent the whole day trying to finish art before the deadline. Unfortunately no photo but anyways:

Pasta with sun-dried tomatoes and pork belly

Had some leftover pork and only 7 garlic pieces left so that worked out really well. I recently started cooking the vegetables (onion garlic mushrooms etc) in the oil from the sun dried tomato jar and turned out really good. Plus, it gives them a red-orange tint and makes the onions look kind of caramelized.

At the end I added 3 shakes of paprika powder and it was quite good.

And oh man things are getting very wrong and Johnathan is noticing it too especially the way Dracula seemingly appeared in his room in the morning?

As in he just walks quietly or was he there the whole time. The fact that I do have background knowledge of Count Dracula's bloodsucking activities before Johnathan does really heightens the tension and also love how Johnathan just goes "well how am I going to shave" after the Count annihilated his mirror.

I'm sure the watch buried in his luggage will be very useful later....

Oh crap. The fact he doesn't stop the describe the interiors of the hallway because of his incoming dread the fact it's sinking in like this especially since we've seen how much effort he takes to note his surroundings. Heck, he still was writing abt the carriage ride while it was surrounded by the wolves but the realization is that much disturbing to him really is telling.

I kid you not I have a sinking feeling that his journal is the last anyone will hear from him. As far as we know we don't know where Mr. Hawkins is here, and the castle is extremely remote and considering the cliff the castle's on John can be thrown out and nobody will find him.

Oh man I actually don't know if he would still continue narrating next day.

5/9

Orange Paprika Lemonada

I've been meaning to find out ways to put the paprika in a drink based on Jonathan's response to it in food since the first few days.

First diced 4 orange slices with scissors, then got another 2-3 slices and smashed them into a strainer for juice. After that, I put some paprika in then added some more orange slices and juice (think I used 1.5? Maybe 2? tablespoons of the paprika powder holy). Finished with 2 tablespoons of lemon juice and put the sparkling water to the desired amount.

It didn't look too terrible but as soon as I poured the sparkling water

All the Paprika rose to the top. It did smell of paprika and I didn't know about drinking it in this state so I waited a little more.

It wasn't bad, in fact I did enjoy it. I might make this sometime again actually. The only thing is it feels like a drink equivalent of smelling salts bc paprika+lemon juice+sparkling water does hit you really hard.

Also yayyyy Mina!

AND JOHNATHAN ARE YOU ALIVE OR NO.

I've been seeing art of her here and there but I don't have context behind it, so I can't wait to see her more in here.

Really love hearing her thoughts too, and there seems to be some strong feelings for Lucy by the way it was so natural for her to say "we" when she was talking about her desire to travel to see the world. I do think she doesn't dislike Johnathan, she seems to look forward to hearing about his journey in Transylvania . Though it seems she pictures a future with Lucy more readily.

Are they lesbians (or bi) in here I really do think so ayyyyyyyyyYYYY-

Hoping her and Lucy can meet in person i want to see more of their dynamic

(and onto john "hurried lines" what do you mean. Is Mina getting the correspondence after 5/8 or is she talking abt 5/8 Dracula Daily what. is he alive

His talk of it feeling like the Arabian Nights and the mention of Hamlet's ghost is not reassuring. It also was interesting how Dracula described peace as "dishonorable" and blood scare to get, makes me think that his family get their daily blood supply from war and conquest and merciless slaughter and now he's too old to partake in imperialism he needs a source of blood to survive.)

5/11

Rose tea with grape juice

I think I didn't get to read 5/11 as it came out this one is a posthumous drink as I made it when catching up on 5/12. I planned to space the chapters out so I could read 5/12 in the morning and 5/13 at the night so I'd be all caught up while having time between the chapters.

Congratulations for 5/11 for the first appearance of ice in the blog. I did have cold drinks but the fridge water dispenser is pretty cold so there wasn't much need for ice.

I first put hot water a third of this mug and put the loose leaf rose tea until it became this color:

followed with 2 tablespoons of lemon juice

Then put the ice for the hot water to get cold faster

And poured the rest of this Korean grape juice drink (it has canned grape things in which I like)

Tasted more of the grape juice than the rose tea, but I didn't mind since the color wasn't diluted at all.

Lucy's pov was interesting! She's more chattier and very eager to speak to Mina, I love the contrast between her wanting to talk so much and her emphasis on how this is secret communication. And speaking of which, she does have very strong feelings....

I don't think she's disinterested in Arthur by the way she admires his personality and thinks well of him in general (look wise, his job, his disposition). However while Lucy talks abt loving Arthur she yearns for Mina's presence physically and relationship wise and the yearning gets very strong at the end (maybe that's why it's supposed to be secret as loving another woman isn't the norm in that era)

The way I see it her feelings for Arthur relationship-wise is more aspirational while with Mina, it feels more present and harder to contain.

[choilproductions]

Do you take commissions?

Veeery fuuunny timing because ive been kinda busy and i was just discussing with a friend about an upcoming partnership we'll be considering 👀👀(somewhat long post incoming)

My friend made an overlay for me to use while streaming that had a facecam spot so I went out on a limb and made myself into a PNGtuber to use for streaming and it turned out very well!! Ended up making them one as well. Putting those two together we talked and came up with the idea to create some type of "Streamer Starter Pack" commission that would offer a custom overlay created by her PLUS a tuber drawn/put together by me, and the goal would make an affordable jumpstart for new streamers! We gotta work out the details and get it set up but it if pulls through and that sounds like something that interests you PLEASE look out for that!! :D

As far as my own personal commissions go, those are definitely something im working towards getting set up very soon as well as i'll be starting college courses soon and leaving my full time job and will have MUCH more time for art (hopefully). If you follow and are interested that as well stay tuuuned!! and ONE last thing obvi i have a tuber now so i will be occasionally streamiiing! No set schedule right now but every now and then i might be playing a solo game or playing modded lethal company with some friends usually feel free to hop in and become a chat member!! [[[fair warning it might get loud sometimes]]]

[achildsfirstsorrow]

hi! i think leontide is really cool, her art is so pretty & the writing is interesting -- could you share a bit more about her? (:

Hi! sorry I didn’t answer this earlier,, I was either asleep or busy ;_;…

But yes I can!!

((I kind of base my POTO writing around it being set in 1880 just because that’s easier than specifying if it’s about 1878-1885 or whatever haha.. ALSO if you wanna scroll there's an incredibly lazy TL;DR and art.))

SO. ONTO LEONTINE! This is going to be cut short but it is STILL rather long.

She was born about 1855 – making her about twenty five during the events of POTO in Grigny (sort of near Paris, about thirteen miles.) She also didn’t live as long.. She lived to be about twenty seven in the main version of her story, but forty in an alternative one. 

Her full name is Leontine Vaillancourt // Leontine Charbonnier depending on which ver of her story! She worked as a stagehand (or atleast did) for a period of around three years (22-25) along with Joseph Buquet. This was because Joseph took her in and gave her a place to stay when she was 18, after meeting her in an inn. 

Buquet basically acted as a friend and brother figure to her (I refuse to make him nasty sorry Buquet haters i’m going to parry you.) up until his death, since both of them could share the (small) income they made with their separate jobs, Buquet obviously working on the stages and Leon working as a maid outside of the Opera House for a few years, until Buquet managed to find her a job as a seamstress and stagehand.

Because I am terrible and believe in making OCxCanon that annoys people! Yes, she’s shipped with Erik and it is not fun and happy. 

Onto how she actually MET Erik, she met him around when she worked with Buquet, because she nearly knocked him out with a weight for the stage backdrops (very cliched I know but..) and had to help a very dazed Erik out – she mistook him for someone who just frequented the Opera instead, despite the rumours about the Opera Ghost stuff which she thought was nonsense DESPITE Buquet trying to tell her that they were true. 

She sort of became acquainted with Erik after Joseph dying, and whilst it wasn’t really a friendship or anything he did see her as a basic needs to an end (because no I won’t make Erik a nice person muahahah.) 

Erik didn’t let on that he had killed him when the events of POTO basically started, and Leontine still thought he was just a rich Opera-goer, so didn’t question too much. Mostly because she was grieving, and due to the fact to cope with said grief she turned to alcohol and other means a lot. 

Due to Erik obviously setting his sights on Christine and stuff, he basically chose to view Leontine as someone he could - for lack of a better phrasing - get what he couldn’t get from Christine from. Erik being a massive asshole, took advantage of the fact she would be drunk sometimes (Not sexual advantage. Thanks.) to get pity from Leon and manipulated her emotionally a LOT. 

However she wasn’t very nice either – and treated Erik with a lot of disregard etc etc, use the fact he was a lot richer to basically extort what she wanted from him etc. 

Eventually she killed herself and there’s a lot more until then but that was ALSO Erik’s fault, as much as I love Erik I refuse to be nice. 

There’s a lot more but here’s some stuff that scrapes it, since i’d be here for much longer trying to explain it. 

TL;DR :

Leontine born in 1850s in poorer part of France

Moved to Paris in late teens/ early 20s

Stayed with Joseph Buquet and worked at Opera House

Became a stagehand

Joseph died

Met Erik via nearly killing him by accident

Sought him out after a while and started very very messy ‘relationship’

Sang and did some performance stuff for a while

  Fuckin’ died.

Also she's a ginger. sorry world.

I have a bunch of art of her, but it's pretty old and I need to redraw it.. so you'll get that soon ya'll sorry. Here's some old doodles anyway though;

[pastacrylic]

Starting to get a little self conscious about my art setup, to be honest :S

All my friends working in the industry or on their way to working in the industry really soon use dedicated pen displays (especially wacoms). I, on the other hand, have been using an 11in iPad Pro 2018 since the thing came out, and I really can't see myself going back to a non touch-display.

But like, the other day I was over at my friend's who's a professional illustrator, and she has a MASSIVE cintiq just sitting on her perfectly laid out desk, and in comparison my setup looks... Super childish. An iPad and a Macbook.

And!! I did try drawing on her cintiq to familiarize with pen tablets again!!! But not being able to zoom, undo, redo, with just finger gestures is so incredibly jarring to me.

Not to mention the PRICE of these things. Sure, art is my main thing, so I SHOULD be able to afford expensive equipment, but... I'm only 23, I don't have an income other than some disability grants and a few commissions, but... 1 grand... 2 grands... 3 grands, sometimes, JUST for a tablet!

GAH I just have a major case of impostor's syndrome. I don't feel like I'm a real artist because I don't have the fancy professional equipment and ARGGHHHHH

[latteartxpmc]

It'd been a slow morning within Latte Art; a few customers here and there with similar orders to the ones they'd had yesterday, though nothing Thomas felt was particularly noteworthy.

It was still too early in the morning for his main rush; sunlight barely peaked above the hills to illuminate the world below. Birds were still motionless, though roosters would be going off soon. Life would spring into action within the hour, and he'd be rushed off his feet for the morning ahead.

Thus he'd start getting prepared; drinks he knew by heart, for customers that he knew would be coming by first ready to go with food to go with it.

"Lo and behold..."

He'd chuckle to himself, cup handed over with coin exchanged; a ping of his register opening as cash was deposited. Soft jazz accompanied the steamy coffee shop, dulcet tunes cascading out with each swing of the door.

As the clock struck 8:42am, however, he knew his most important customer would be coming through the door within 3 minutes; her platinum hair hung low, silver eyes complimenting her pristine features despite the messy appearance she gave from getting up and rushing over.

As his large fingers finished his work - a masterpiece by his standards, though he'd need nothing less if he wanted to impress her - the door swung open, the sweet scent of feminine perfume loitering through the air.

"Well now, if I didn't know you better, I'd say you'd almost had a bad night."

There was a chuckle behind his fanged grin, emerald eyes glancing her up and down; he was doing his best to hide the tinge of jealousy he could feel creeping into his flushed cheeks, hidden deep behind fur.

"The usual, I assume, Liliana?"

He'd already began pushing the white cup towards the cat-woman, struggling to maintain his gaze at her face and not look down her blouse. He wanted to be a gentleman, he truly did...

Lili just made that difficult, sometimes.

"I, uh... W-Was hoping that maybe after work, we could... Hang out, o-or somethin'! Just chill together, 'Promise!"

He didn't want to start stammering in front of her, though she'd seen him be nervous enough times by now that she'd know it was apart of his package.

In truth, Thomas had something to give the other; a small diamond ring, all of his savings in one package. He'd wanted to formally propose for a while, now; especially after their mock wedding and his venture into wedding hospitality.

That was going really well, by the by; it'd generated him enough income to allow it to be self-sufficient and still net him a decent income. This ring, however, had eaten into every last piece of savings he had. It had to be special to him for Thomas to even consider it being special to her.

----------------------- For @haemoxin // Please do not reblog if you are not the intended recipient!

[foster-the-world]

Aw, man

Last night the district wide school board meeting turned into a debate about Israel. With some claiming the DOE is not doing "enough." Apparently enough means they haven't yet written a email condemning the kidnappings in Israel? With claims they would have already sent a letter if it was black people. I guess the district is waiting on a legal team to approve language. So it should go out today or tmrw. Not good enough for these people. I don't get it. The DOE did send a letter condemning racism and it doesn't do shit to protect my kids. We are still in the most segregated school system in the nation. I am 100% confident the man claiming they "would have already done it if it was black people." made sure his children were in the majority white schools. The anti-racism letter didn't change his desire to segregate his children so why would a anti-semitism letter help jewish students? Writing a letter condemning the kidnappings in Israel is not going to protect my kids one bit nor help the children who were kidnapped. Our district has migrant children pouring in every single week. Let's talk about how we can support them. Letter or no letter I do not care.

I left that meeting to go to our schools PTA meeting. We did spend a good amount of time talking about how we can help the new migrant children who started at our school last week. Apparently 1000 more children entered the district on Friday - set to start next week. My 2nd graders class got three more students last week. Rebel's 1st grade class got two more students. We've been working on our Spanish at home and making sure the girls include them. I'm so glad we are at a school where we teach the kids to welcome their new friends. I have no doubt the uniform, clothing, coat drive will be fully funded - even though we have a school full of low income parents who aren't exactly rolling in the dough.

This morning I'm talking to the Principal about the clothing/Halloween costume drive when she gets a text message and looks horrified. Apparently a lower grade kid told their teacher they can't be around them because they are Jewish and their Mom told them Jewish people are dangerous. So fucked up. Poor baby being taught that hate and poor teacher having to hear it from a student she pours her hard work into.

I'm not really worried about my girls hearing shitty things. As mentioned they are tough and can handle themselves. The toughness does mean they can be jerks but also means they wouldn't hesitate to fight back if someone says shit like that to them. People have said other shitty things to them and they returned with the 6yo version of "go fuck yourself" and were indignant more then hurt. *Obviously they didn't use the f word. They have a solid group of friends in their class who would know to defend them. Although we are going to have a talk about what to say if someone talks negatively about Juduism or if they hear someone say anything racist/prejudice/etc to themselves or any of their friends. We've had the general talk before but probably need to be more specific on the Jewish side of things. Every year my husband and I bring Hanukkah celebration stuff to their class. Everyone is always very receptive. Last year Bee's teacher was Jewish. They've generally had at least one jewish family in their class - although that dwindles in the older grades. We live two doors down from the JCC - so they go to classes there so do get to spend time around Jewish children regardless. This semester they are taking an art class there and we go to the shabbat dinners sometime.

Bee has a Ukrainian girl in her class - well her grandparents are from Ukraine. So Bee came home last year talking about how people are murdering babies "as soon as they come out" in the Ukrainian war. Now this year her little friend is from Israel - so she comes home with more horror stories he hears from home and interprets into six year old language. The world we are giving our children is not okay.

[roter-zirkus]

Ma'am, I just work here

Working in a pawn shop in Baldur's Gate sometimes means being privy to the most interesting items, even those that maybe you should have never put your hands on.

or: Raphael visits the most unfortunate little pawn shop worker

It's another quiet day at the "Brokering Gate", a little smarmy pawn office that lies between the recently collapsed Steel Watcher Foundry and the Guilt docks, a blocked-off area for incoming trade that remains just barely under the table. Ever since the rubble of that huge flying brain mass came down, there has been a weird rotting note to the air that borders on repugnant just barely. To keep the worst of it out, most of the "Gate's" shutters have been closed and enchanted with a shield-type spell – Yas doesn't care much for the details – due to their windows being blown to shittereens during the initial blast. It's a wonder, or curse depending on who you ask, that the shop still stands.

Yas hates, absolutely loathes working at the "Brokering Gate" on account of its weird customers and despicable owner, but she also hates not having anything to eat or a roof over her head, so in the end she just has to bite the bulette. And with the evasion of total annihilation comes some perks. People find the most interesting things to sell amidst the chaos coming to their silly little pawn shop, their competitors having mostly been wiped out or turned into ilithids.

One of those people had surprisingly been none other than THE hero, Tav, and their merry band of weirdos waltzing into the store, most of them heaving under the weight of overfilling pouches and backpacks, the jingle-jangle filling the air when the bags hit the ground. It had been a bad day for their accounts but a good one for stuffing the shop up the roof with items of varying usefulness.

One of these items had been a trilogy of diaries. As soon as Yas opened them during a lull in the shop she knew she had found her new obsession for the next weeks. Two of the three books were filled to the brim with mischief, silly little poems, intricate plans, or just daily developments, all written by some seemingly third-grade bard working hard to fill his made-up fantasy with lore. The third one however stopped halfway through, leaving an open end to the saga of the writer, a self-serving schemer hungering for power over the Nine Hells, and his assumed dalliance with the so-called hero, a tadpoled fool trapsing through the world the writer seemingly controlled.

Usually, Yas wouldn't go for such bottom-of-the-barrel fiction, but after skimming over them she had decided to fully embrace their weirdness.

Now it's deep into the afternoon and instead of having another go at the inventory she stands entranced at the counter ruffling through the pages, giggling to herself.

"Predilection. Who talks like that?", she quietly murmurs, although a part of her envies the artful usage of these special little words. With a grin, Yas comforts herself by imagining the fop with this kind of speech trying to order a beer at the bar she works her evening shifts at.

The soft little chime from the bell above their entrance takes her back to the store and she mentally readies her customer service personality. In walks an older man, a slight limp to his right leg, steadying himself on an intricate wooden cane with golden inlays, the soft tock of it accompanying the scraping of his "good" foot across the floor. Yet something about his demeanor stops her from emphasizing with him. His "warm" smile sends shivers down her spine, not the good kind, his left hand readies itself in the air for a grand gesture and his clothes look preened and faultless. She knows she probably can't hide it behind her fake smile, but all she feels is disdain.

Yet when the man starts to talk, she does notice that his voice has a deep rumble that resonates with her. Yas gets a good look at his sharp features and soft skin, since no matter what he says, he can't seem to stand still, instead opting for theatrical movement and emphasis on his words with every twitch of his face. "My dear bespackled attendant of this fine éstablissement, may I use some of your precious time to inquire about some items that might have found their way into your possession? Obviously, your help will be well compensated should you have any of these items at hand. I have had quite the adventure searching all over town and imagine my unbridled surprise upon finding out that there was still one last market to peruse. Resting amidst the-"

By this point Yas has already put two and two together, looking forward to the peacock finishing his exhausting monologue and confirming her suspicion. In the meantime she nods politely along, adding some "Uhuu's" and "no way's" here and there, nearly draining her affirmative vocabulary, until she finally has it and simply moves the diary she had been reading across the counter.

That shuts him up all right. As soon as his eyes spy the unassuming, worn-down cover, a wave of joy washes over his features, quickly hidden away just so, behind his noble mask.

She hopes that between his grandiose entrance and the following speech, he never realized that she was actively reading one of his diaries, before pushing it out of the way. When trying to glean his face for a reaction all she gets is the usual calm demeanor.

"I'm sorry for interrupting you, but from my colleagues' descriptions, this book and its siblings might be the item you're looking for. If you would like we can verify this by counter-checking the text with your description." Yas is trying everything not to let her face betray that she knows about the innards of this book or that she can't believe that the writer is the guy in front of her. It's never good to directly laugh at a customer.

A shadow crawls over the customer's face and suddenly her giddiness dissipates into fear. Unlike before, this time she feels like the show of emotion is meant for her. Yas quickly puts up her hands in defense: "I'm so sorry that my colleagues rustled around in your private property but they had to make sure none of the books were cursed or dangerous in a similar fashion. Obviously, I have no interest in further violating your privacy."

Now a toothy smile flashes across his features and instead of the cane he now leans onto the counter, somehow still being taller than Yas standing at full height. "My dear friend, I am so very grateful for your understanding. The loss of these precious memories has left me quite hurt and it would not do to add to this pain. There is no need for you to read more of the text, there should be a sigil on the blurp, simply lay it out here and I will show you."

With an unsure grin of her own, she does as he bids and lays down the book, blurp for both to see. A swift motion later he holds a dagger in his hand, much to the shock of Yas, yet before she can exclaim her bewilderment, he simply pokes himself in the finger and vanishes it just as quickly as he conjured it. A distinct smell of sulphur fills her nose and she gets a bit queasy looking at two drops of blood spilling on the page of the book.

A second ticks by and suddenly a fiery symbol burns itself into the book.

The silence afterward is palatable.

"Yeah. I guess this is yours, huh." Yas is sure that she is not getting paid enough to deal with what kind of fiery devil shit this might be, so she just shrugs and goes to the backroom to get the other books. She wants this man out of the shop as soon as possible.

As soon as she comes back into his view, he starts up again: "Thank you very much, dear. Say, you don't happen to have some hellishly delicious paintings lying around?"

Oh no.

She knows very well where they are, but considering what Cambrin, her boss, has done to them, she decides she won't be the one to bring this up.

"There might be some more in the personal vault of my employer, but he is unfortunately not in today and won't allow anyone else into his office." Before she finishes the sentence anger flashes into his eyes and his nose scrunches, but she has an idea to smoothe him over immediately. "I'm sure he will come in in the evening to make sure everything is up to speed. Considering how late it already is, it shouldn't be long now."

That somewhat appeases her customer and she allows herself a moment of respite.

He purses his lip, a hand to his chin as if to seriously consider what she just said. "Well, I think I can offer up some more of my precious time for your employer, even though it will certainly throw around my plans for the evening. Will some of your other colleagues be there tonight? Specifically, those that wanted to sate their curiosity with these books?" He is all smiles but there's a dangerous shine to his gaze, that renders his brown eyes almost black.

"The evening shift should be taking over then, yes. We usually stay open late into the night, so we have to change it up. Considering the work plan they might be there, but I can't make any promises."

He pushes himself further onto the counter to lean closer to her face as if to share a secret just between the two of them. "Surely you have heard of the little idiom of the fortunate rat, fleeing the ship before it tragically goes down with its captain. I suppose, there are certain situations in which one should adhere to that principle, saving one's skin before it is too late." He gifts Yas another smile, this time arguably more toothy than before, his canines growing before her eyes.

She can't stop herself from mumbling: "That would make me the rat I presume." They both lock eyes and all he does to acknowledge Yas is a slight tilt of the head.

Living in Baldur's Gate is hard enough as it is, with weird tentacle monsters, bandits, and bloody murders seeping into the daily survival. And now this… thing was making it very obvious that the shop was going to see his reckoning. Maybe it was finally time to leave the city for good.

With a deep inhale she takes a step back and fishes the key to the store out of her pocket, puts it on the counter with a soft clink and slips it over to the stranger.

"A very wise decision."

Without another word or acknowledgment, she steps out behind the bar and slowly makes her way to the exit. Before she can fully leave, however, the stranger has to get in another sentence:

"I do hope you remember to keep privacy matters a higher priority from now on, my dear. After all, you never know who might be watching."

She can only nod, locking eyes with him once again before she all but runs out of the store.

The next day she will walk past the store, finding it surrounded by Flaming Fists trying to put out the fires and talking about the charred corpses inside.