#art and writing are really all i have right now. i can't physically speak without crying and i need to sequester myself

[seapasture]

i am going to sit down and draw the gentlest scene one can possibly imagine, or the pure visual manifestation of unabashed fury. there will be no in-between (unless)

[blackstarising]

oooh people aren’t gonna like this part but when it comes to this discussion of miguel o'hara being racially fetishized (and I do believe it's happening, mind you) I think it’s really important to note - and I am metaphorically sitting down and saying this gently in my Auntie voice - that you're not automatically exempt from this conversation if you're a creator of color yourself. like, you're not, I'm sorry.

I'm not latine so I'm not speaking to latine creators here, but I am black, yeah? and you might not like to hear this but we are Just as capable of perpetuating the hypersexualization of minority bodies as anyone else. we do not get a pass, okay? we do it too, and to be blunt, that shit is not acceptable nor is it at all cute.

now before someone comes in saying “oh, so I can't be attracted to him?? he can't be sexual??” I think you know very well that is not my point here. my point is that the miguel o'hara tag is predominantly sexualized content right now - it's about breeding, it's about biting, it's about possessiveness and aggressive sex, fan art is constantly accentuating his physical size, and it would be FINE if this content wasn't the exclusive majority. but it is so, so dominant and creators of color are doing it too and we have to be accountable.

creators of color, especially black creators, I am not disregarding the time you've spent on your work. I know that some of the content you are creating is also for readers who aren't represented. but, please, I am asking you to be careful. I am asking you to think critically about the content you both consume and create. I am asking you to ask yourselves why you might be inclined to exclusively associate this darker skinned man with violence. I am asking you to ask yourselves if you're only considering him speaking another language in a sexual context. I am asking you to think very carefully about why you might feel tempted to fixate on quote-unquote animalistic traits. I get up on this rusty fandom soapbox every now and then because I do believe that fandom is not without implication. we perpetuate racism, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, and other forms of bigotry in fandom as it is modeled in the real world. and the hypersexualization of black and brown bodies is very, scarily real, and it has real world implications that include adultification and sexual violence.

like, that's the issue here. look, I’m not trying to be the fandom police. I'm not telling you to stop writing or drawing. I'm not telling you to turn off your feelings. and I can block tags, I can monitor my own media consumption, and I will. but this doesn't exist in a vacuum and yes, white people should be called out but don't think we get a pass and don't think we shouldn't examine our own works because we're people of color too.

[northadawn]

NorthaDawn's Feb 2024 Update

Hello everyone, NorthaDawn here, and it's February here, I hope that your 2024 has been going great so far! Mine has been decent so far, and I wanted to write this important journal to give you some in-depth news into the latest happenings that I've been doing that I feel all of you deserve to know about!

1) PERSONAL HAPPENINGS

I'll get the elephant in the room out of the way first; on the health side of things, I've been doing much better and physically, this is the healthiest I've been in ages. Mentally? Let's just say that I've had to cut off someone really toxic from the community; they've caused a lot of trouble for me and my dear friends for months. I don't want to dive further into what happened to keep my friends safe, but I do want to say this: be there for your friends and stand up for them when they need you around.

Apart from that, I have been changing up things here and there and handling stuff in my university and in my family, but I do have some things cooking up for you guys that I'll share with you here later! But first, I want to go over my announcement from a handful of days back to clarify a few things.

2) THAT SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT

You've probably already read my post where I announced my decision to continue making Titanic content in the future instead of retiring, but I think I should also explain why I contemplated retiring (again). To be honest with you, ever since my heart attack ages ago, things have gone poorly for me here; a partnership that wasn't meant to be, my ever-increasing workload in university, losing momentum and motivation for Titanic art in general, and feeling like a stranger here again has been a few reasons as to why I decided to quit once 2023 turns into 2024. However, a new partnership with smolnoodlekitty that soon turned into "Team Heartslash" (which includes people such as Matlock26th, caitlin._.art, Lacoeurdelamer, NWArtOfficial), getting more lovely people to voice act my characters, and the support from the newest batch of talented artists in the community made me rethink my decision to step away from doing Titanic art. That's why I decided to stay on! Unironically, I wouldn't still be here today without your support, so thank you all for continuing to support me even though I barely upload at all these days. I'm trying to work on that, I promise.

Speaking of characters...

3) MY FIRST OC: MASAKO HONDA

I finally made an actual original character that isn't a gijinka of some sort! I got the confidence to finally make a character that isn't limited to being a gijinka, and I'm happy with what I have. You've probably already seen her if you checked out my Twitter, but here she is: Masako Honda!

Masako Honda is a hyperactive, ADHD-ridden Japanese-Filipino girl who moved to the Philippines at the age of 10. Despite being a self-proclaimed nerd who is very geeky and hyperactive to the point where she can't stay still for 5 minutes, she is a very attractive girl who is way out of most guys' league. However, she doesn't have a boyfriend since birth. She took up the Game Development course in her university because of her self-taught ability in Unity and in C#. Just don't call her a Java developer.

That's a brief introduction of her, she'll soon have her place in my gallery, and I hope you'll be excited for that day to come as much as I am! The early reception I got from both my Discord server and my classmates has been insane and I couldn't be more thankful for the response I got for her!

4) SOCIAL MEDIAS (DISCORD SERVER + DA GROUP)

I've been going around and trying to update my social media pages and stuff, and I understand that there's a lot of links to keep up with, so I compiled them all in one page so you can quickly go to my profiles in certain sites! You can check them out right now through my Linktree here: https://linktr.ee/NorthaDawn

Speaking of updates, I've also been doing a little rebrand, which is why I've transitioned away from my old theme to the one I've had right now, I hope you like the new look!

I've also decided to take on a new tagline that I feel would represent not only me, but also all of you guys as a whole well. It's a simple line, yet it's a very motivational one, at least for me, and I hope it'll be motivational for you too. The tagline? "THERE IS STILL A VOYAGE TO EMBARK ON."

As a final reminder, I do have a Discord server up that also serves as a server for smolnoodlekitty and caitlin._.art! You can join through this link here: https://discord.gg/gsxGMPMPNb

5) VOICE ACTRESS ANNOUNCEMENT

Of course, I'd save the best for last. I'll keep it short and sweet...

RMS Olympic (Olyvia McLoughlin) - caitlin._.art

You probably know her as my Titanic's voice for a bit now, but she'll now be primarily voicing the Old Reliable now! She also did the absolutely gorgeous art for this announcement! As for who'll take her spot as Titanic?

RMS Titanic (Emily McLoughlin) - Lacoeurdelamer

She's the nice girl who'll play the Queen of the Ocean! If you've been around my Discord server, you know her as Maxine, and the amount of similarities she has to my Titanic is quite insane, which is why she's the perfect fit!

Masako Honda - moonglower.art + smolnoodlekitty

A 2-for-1! Weren't expecting that, were you? Either way, they're sharing duties to be the voice of the hyperactive college girl!

I hope you'll be looking forward to hearing them bring my characters to life!

FINAL REMARKS

Thanks for your continued support, and I hope that this has been a nice update so you're up to speed with what's going on in my end of things. Please do leave a comment, I'd like to know what you think! Also, go support every artist mentioned in this journal, they deserve it too! Have a wonderful day!

-Northa

THERE IS STILL A VOYAGE TO EMBARK ON

[seasideretreat]

Decisions

I maintain nonetheless that we must ultimately conclude Sartre's whole philosophy is a bit numbing. People speak about analysis paralysis: I suppose that is the essence of Sartrianism.

Why do I like IT? Because it is animational. It gives a soul to the world. Sure, you can design eco-friendly power plants, but that is just going to throw more buildings into the world, buildings where nothing happens: on a computer, you can play games and music and you can watch movies or read books - animation. Of course, you're gonna wonder, what is the world going to be without the substance of carpentry, physics and chemistry? And the answer is: information. But we do need some substance of course, but I nevertheless feel that if we stop believing in computer science is the day we lose it.

Now for some philosophy: if the whole world consists of atoms, and robots could become infinitely more advanced, what makes it so that humans are sapient and computers are not? Maybe this is the killer question that is the reason religion seems so silly nowadays. We are starting to see that there is little magical about our bodies. We are just machines that are incredibly highly developed. Yet I instinctively feel there are tons of problems with that notion as well. Edsger Dijkstra said that the question whether machines can think is comparable to whether submarines can swim. Clearly, that invites us to think about really advanced water engines that can mimic swimming. So it really seems that thinking can become mechanized. Nevertheless, I gather something is faulty about this. Thinking is connected to mental activity, just like living, writing, reading, speaking and dancing. We have trouble assigning such notions to animals, even though we can see that animals do many lively activities. Despite that, we can't say that animals have minds like we do, simply because they don't speak. We usually ascribe this to their brain-capacity, but some animals with highly advanced brains don't seem to speak either, viz. the octopus or the elephant. Of course the notable exception is dancing. We do say that bees dance, sometimes. Also, singing is an exception, because we do say that whales sing. It seems we are just frantically guarding this notion of speech to keep ourselves in a position of superiority over the animals.

If animals can think, that says nothing about whether robots can think. A striking taciturnity. Kurt Vonnegut once quipped that we are on this Earth to "fart around", i.e. dilly-dally, which seems weirdly true - and maybe it is also a little tragic. Robots have a singular purpose. They can't skylark like humans can. However, we don't really have to do anything to animate the world. We just have to wake, or watch which is the same word. On the other hand, I think it is hard to stay awake when we've got nothing to do. And that brings us back to that primordial question: what to do? And I always answer this with: help people go on holidays. Of course, if everybody did that the world would descend into anarchy, but it can be all right for a while until you figure out what to do, I mean it really is an inexhaustible industry. The world is a dangerous place. Everybody needs to eat. But we can't all be farmers; that's how things used to be, sure, but people farm more efficiently now. I mean, I want to be better with IT, but I don't know if I'll aim at making money from it. Right now I work for the mail, but that can't last forever, and I don't want it to last forever. I don't even really enjoy it.

There was a time when people aimed at being polymaths, the homo universalis. Good in math, good in languages, good in arts, good in sports maybe even, maybe even good at warfare. Leonardo da Vinci is the most important exponent of this, and he wasn't probably that perfect in the last analysis; but I don't suppose polmathists want to be perfect, they just want to be cultivated. Cicero said you have to be a fool to dance. He also said that a house without books was a house without a soul. Certainly, conversation often consists merely of talk, but I do wonder if dancing cannot be a good way to animate the world. The Dutch author Gerard van het Reve said too that his books were meant to "liberate people from the material world." I've just made the same point for computers. But surely there is more to life than working and otiose conversation. But I don't study computer science to animate the world, I just do it because it clears my head. I just need to have something to fix my attention on. As I said, to animate the world, all you need do is wake (that is to say, watch). But I am not anti-religion or anything; you know religion does all these rituals right, that do seem to serve the purpose of animating the world. But it is probably not per se up to us to instigate such celebrations, which are beyond our control. Computers are simpler. That reminds of a quote by John von Neumann: people think mathematics is complicated because they don't realize how complicated life is. Yeah, it really seems like priest is such an interesting job. Doing those rituals really connects you to all those people, and you're personally involved in all those theological disputations that somehow connect to the things you do in the church: it's a lot. But, the real question is what is the soul of a city? Because obviously being a priest is peanuts compared to the vast totality of the society - even though I do think it is a fine job. And the thing is, you should just focus on the task at hand. Animation is not for nothing tied to silly children's entertainers. You could just do random things to animate the world, but that would be foolish, and you could draw silly faces and do weird things, but that would also be foolish. So it's best to just focus on the task at hand. Sometimes that will be IT, and sometimes that will be talking to your neighbour or enjoying a cup of tea. Or if you're a priest, it might be taking a confession from a vexed fellow.

[the-shrinkingviolet]

It's been 4 years

4 years since I've logged in or shared anything. (And apparently my blog is 13 years old now! Time flies!) I see it's changed quite a bit, so I might stick around. I don't know. On one hand I feel cringey about coming back and using Tumblr for some reason, but on the other hand I miss seeing the creative side to this site and sharing good art and my interests.

What really brought me back here though was the fact that I felt the need to make a post about how I'm feeling. To go back to "venting" on here like I used to. Just for the moment though. Thankfully, since being on medication I don't feel as trapped or stuck inside myself like I used to. I'm able to handle my emotions and thoughts and feelings in a much healthier way than I used to and actually talk about things. Thanks Prozac!

I really just feel the need to vent right now though in an effort to express myself, not because I don't talk about it, but I guess to just articulate better in words how I'm feeling and how I have felt the past 5 months.

April was a very difficult time for myself and my family and everything has changed tenfold since then. My father had a massive stroke and wound up in the hospital for nearly a week. He almost died and we were fully prepared to make funeral arrangements. But he came back around, sort of. Since then he's made leaps and bounds in progress physically. He has no paralysis, only some nerve damage and numbness of his feet and hands that come and go. He can walk well and does not need a cane or any other assistance. He passed physical therapy in only a few weeks with flying colors. Unfortunately it's the cognitive side of things are not good. There is permanent damage and he will never be the same person ever again. What caused the stroke was a severe blockage in his left carotid artery. He was on medication (and lifestyle and diet changes) these last several months to try to break up the blockage some so that he could have surgery to take the rest out and put a stent in. But none of the treatments have worked. The blockage is still there -- 90%+. So the only other option is to do a bypass through his scalp. There are many risks involving the surgery and of course after, and it won't prevent another stroke from occurring 100%, but it will help lower those odds. Despite this, despite showing my parents the studies and research how bypasses still can greatly reduce the risk of stroke despite all the other factors involved, my father has refused. The doctor basically said that without surgery, the next stroke he has will likely be worse than before and if it doesn't kill him it will render him unable to do much of anything.

My dad has since been forced into retirement and can never return to work. He was forced to sell his farm because he can't do the heavy lifting anymore. He can't tinker or reprogram technology like he used to. One of the smartest and headstrong men I knew now struggles to comprehend what he reads, cannot write, stutters horribly when talking (but can still speak sentences and is still undergoing speech therapy), and cannot drive. I see him feeling depressed and angry and grieving over what he's lost. It makes me sad and angry too and it brings me to tears thinking about it every time. And I really, really wish there was more I could do.

I mean, is there? I'm trying. I've been trying to find him new hobbies. But I don't know where to begin. He has autistic tendencies, so he's very specific with his hobbies and hates trying new things. He loves animals but cannot own a farm. He has always loved technology but has a hard time comprehending it now and it frustrates him trying to use a computer or phone anymore. He hates going out and has developed paranoia now since his stroke. He doesn't talk to anyone hardly, never really had before but now it's worse. His eyesight is permanently damaged now so reading is hard for him although he still does and tries his best. He does take walks, but not far or for very long. Again, I think because of the paranoia with people seeing him in this state now. He's never been an artsy or crafty type and doesn't like those things.

My brother lives at the house now and doesn't do much to help out. He's taken them to appointments when mom can't or doesn't feel like driving. He's fixed up some stuff around the house since the stroke happened, but that's about it. He's otherwise a pathetic piece of furniture that just takes up space, plays video games half the day, doesn't contribute to shit, complains about everything he doesn't like, yet still does not have a job after being back here these last few years. (No comment on my parents handling that situation -- I'm an asshole and I would've kicked him out after a year but whatever) My mother is stressed being power of attorney now with handling all of my dad's finances and benefits, while also going to appointments with him and explaining things to him to help him comprehend what's going on. She's doing a decent job handling it all. I've offered to help with the finances just to take some stress off her shoulders, but she refused. She says she can handle it, so be it. I do step in and chauffeur now to their long distance appointments when my brother refuses, because again, he's a useless piece of shit. The communication between my mom and my dad has been terrible though. She's not patient enough with him and cuts him off guessing what he's trying to say and it just frustrates him more. Between that and my brother just being a useless leech, the house is tense. Some days moreso than usual, and yesterday was one of those days. I couldn't wait to leave. I hate to say that because I want to spend as much time with my dad as I can while he's still here -- because I always have a sinking feeling that he won't be here by next year.

It's been hard jugging this with my job in which I can't even keep FMLA benefits with because the company they use loves to fuck people over and deny the benefits where they can because paperwork comes up "missing". (I call bullshit and I'm ready to kick someone's rear end through the phone now that I've had my claim closed 3 different times by these morons. Oi) Without these benefits in place, I'm not excused at my job to even care for a parent because heaven forbid the company I work for even remotely gives two shits about their slaves to offer an unpaid single day off. On top of all this I am in the process of job hunting yet again.

I guess that's all I have for now. Did this make me feel better? Eh, maybe? I don't know. I think I just wish I could live another life right now.

[eldritch-queern-magicat]

When I was very young, all I wanted was to perform music on a stage. I shied away from that dream after a few years past foster hell. I felt all over again how they had made a blatant mockery of me, with what I was struggling with. They only saw a wild child, and did their best to crush me. Afterwards, Nanny absolutely made it worse, even though she claimed to love me (I'm honestly still unpacking this mess).

When my parents helped me realize what being a famous musician would mean besides the art form, I was afraid. Terrified of the potential scrutiny that would come from it. So I ended up just putting that dream away. Writing stories would become my primary outlet after that, because something had to take its place. Later, I'd also develop my skills at drawing. I'm an artist, it's in my genes. I wouldn't stop singing and otherwise making music as I could, of course. It just wasn't anything other than keeping myself grounded at some level, reminding me that other people do feel the same kinds of things as me.

The whole thing is, that original dream still hung on like an aloe plant for decades. I might try to ignore it, but it would never really die. It survived on the dregs of my other art. And I've been realizing this week just how easy it could actually be, for me, to make my poetry into song.

There's a video on Instagram of me reciting one of my poems written last month. I have this cadence, apparently, that people really like. But I have it very much because of music. Dad is also an entertainer by nature, with theatre and the carnivals as a young man, and even now is still entertaining almost anyone he has a conversation with. The rest is from various YouTubers I follow, some who read stories for their channels, and quite a number of science/history/plus communicators and educators.

Yes, I've been thinking of reading more of my poetry and posting on Instagram and such. But the thing with the video I did share, is that I was so focused on my poem and setting the desired tone of the event I was at, I didn't think about anyone recording it at all. I guess I should have realized it was bound to be recorded. But it was me not even thinking about being recorded that helped me speak without getting too nervous as well as I did. So the idea that I know I'm being recorded, because I chose it in the first place, is a lot more nerve-wracking.

It's not that I'm afraid I can't do it, since speaking to any kind of audience is getting a little easier each day. It's the trauma and baggage I've been carrying my entire life. It's that whole thinking it's better to stick to the shadows and background. But the truth is, I've always been very visible in life. And frankly, it was often against my will to begin with. So choosing to embrace that visibility is a lot scarier than just having it thrust onto me by someone else.

The most frustrating part about this is the fact that doing it is inevitable. I just struggle with the video format because it seems to mean showing my messy-looking face. I've been subjected to so much judgement over how the nerves literally don't even all work right to begin with. How I had no impulse control, when the truth was I just never had the time to develop it. It's kind of why I abandoned my tiktok account years ago, along with some general platform type concerns (and it's not even the political crap).

Yes, I've thought of going back and doing stuff. But my physical appearance makes me nervous about it, since people are still so judgemental. This may also be inevitable, though. I'm in the middle of reclaiming myself, and the decision to embrace my physical visibility has already been carved in stone.

Being entirely honest, I don't quite know where this will end up leading me. I'm walking into the wide unknown with only my lantern to guide me through the shadows. And even though it seems like I have no path to even follow, or even a clear destination, every step farther lands on solid ground. My path unfolds with each step I take, even if I'm only stepping onto thin air.

A snowball's chance in Hell is all I need.

-Sterling 🎉😺

[cherry-colored-petals]

UPDATE ON MY THEORY: I FOUND MORE EVIDENCE AND I THINK I JUST GOT A BREAKTHROUGH

After rechecking every post, seeing what clues was left behind and EVEN down to the first few posts when EBG started, I found so many things I need to list out:

(keeping it under a read more because oh my god I'm so invested in this hep)

From the first 2 letters from Albedo, he seem to write with the ending of:

Knights of Favonius' Chief Alchemist,

Albedo ⭐

However, on his third and more recent letter, it has already changed into a more cursive format without the title AND the absence of the star.

The first sighting of the blank ask was from @.kurikurikurisu, who talked about their husband asking them if they were alright, even detailing Zhongli's arrival. However, due to the matters of 'Albedo' tampering with the system of Tumblr (at least by the evidence, it seems minimally...), the ask was considered blank and it was the first sightings of many blank asks in the blog.

Interestingly, however, the first few before the blank ask phenomenon during the challenge had Rin talk about Albedo instead, with one post featuring Zhongli's back by @.haliyamori and the name Albedo highlighted in bold.

During the events of day 2 in one of @.mixed-kester's ask, Rin began to bring up to Albedo about the phenomenon (blank asks) and he mentioned that it could be some type of curse, leading him to say, "perhaps I should examine all letters before passing them to you from now on"

(interestingly, the word adorable was in italics, but it's not as relevant of a hint)

Because of those words, it is very clear that 'Albedo' shows his signs of being self aware in the dawn of day 2 AND he is already actively working on sabotaging each attempt during that point in time. It is very clear from when he had tossed the letter into the fire when Rin left to make him coffee.

On @.silkjade's ask, the words jade help me is crossed out.

On @.kurikurikurisu's second message, they talk about having to draw an old art and had a bit of a conversation with Alhaitham. However, due to the system being "broken" which honestly I doubt it is, if it was actually because of Albedo and... Many others... Rin only sees it as Risu talking to themselves and in the tags, they mentioned, "this physically pains me send help".

On day 2, I sent an ask about 'Albedo' showing signs of being a yandere and am the first to bring up Dorian, which sparked the seed of doubt by the response:

"it's normal to want to keep someone around you constantly if you love them, surely?"

"... Right?"

This hints how the dynamic works between 'Albedo' and Rin, and although it is considered normal for most to have your lover closest to you, this can also be used as an excuse for those with malicious intent to keep their victims close so they don't find out what is really going on.

On @.mixed-kester's ask, they mentioned about the blank asks and the answer from Rin, interestingly, had the word 'something' italicized.

It also mentioned in that ask that Albedo can sense something in the papers and implied it may be dangerous (which is the others trying to help them from being manipulated and being twisted in being the bad guys).

Another ask from anon that had Rin mention about the trend of people talking and looking at empty air and asking them if they're okay (implying that they can't see/don't recognize the existence of their original biases as per the game's rules).

Another ask I sent about Dorian, and having to wish to talk to Rin about this. In the response however, the word 'totally' is italicized.

A random post from Rin saying "everything reminds me of him", followed by @.silkjade speaking about cryptic posts deserving a strike. This gets dealt with by Rin clarifying that they meant 'Albedo', though the statement without context is worrisome.

In an ask with ❤️ ⚰️ anon, Rin mentions about memory loss, and they described it as:

"oh that's normal, I have that room it's kind of like a fogginess in your head, right? like you can't exactly remember certain events clearly and stuff..."

It is rather clear from that and the explanation Albedo gave them (which sounds like an excuse so he can keep those memories locked away or worse) that they're already losing memories from day 2.

An ask was sent during day 2 about the URL. The excuse that was given to @.nohrenvia was that it was their other chinese name, and yes, the other was italicized.

In @.silkjade's ask, they mentioned that everything they said about Albedo sounded sarcastic. In response, they behemently denied it. Interestingly, 'dare' was italicized.

On an anonymous ask by the 🌼 anon, Rin briefly gets interrupted by Albedo and talks nervously about not destroying things.

An anon asked if posting/sending Zhongli related stuff is prohibited, which is led to another blank ask.

(Clarification on the all is good part: only e was glitched out!)

In one of the asks from @.ansy-tea, the tags mentioned, "ansy I hate you", "I mean love" and "not as much as I love albedo tho". In the response, though, 'Albedo' keeps his star (when we are aware he doesn't have it.)

On one of @.ainescribe's ask (which was a batch of photos of Zhongli), a conversation was sparked between Ansy and 'Albedo'. In the second to last photos, he neglected showing his star- and in the last photo had a smug, almost victorious look on his face. This may just imply that he's very aware and can contribute to the fact he's sentient.

on one of the asks by @.dustofthedailylife, they asked how does it feel to deal with withdrawals and if they're okay (in day 2). The response was normal as Rin answered about caffeine withdrawals, but the tags only had ":)" ":))" ":)))"

@.queen-belial first sent an ask to Rin which is basically "Rin blink twice if Albedo is holding you captive". The following conversation ensued with Rin saying they weren't kept captive, and Queen mentions the blanks in their memories and the fact they can't see messages (most likely implying of Zhongli). This ended with Queen saying that they mixed them up with someone, but it seems dragonli was not happy of the outcome and Rin mentions to keep their 'mascot' in check.

On one of the asks sent by @.kurikurikurisu, they had letters colored in their ask. If formed, it reads, 'good luck, Rin <3'. However, Rin's response is concerning as they mentioned about how they act like they're in danger and said 'everything is fine'.

On one of my asks that I sent (which Xiao intercepted), it seems that they couldn't read most of his message and had thought that someone (Zhongli) died.

2 of @.cuddleluc's asks were seen as blanks.

In a conversation with @.the-travelling-snitch and Rin, they mentioned in their tags that everything is fine, and even on their response. As usual, it is in bold with an additional :).

(Curiously, under that same thread, @.lychniis put in the tags, "*looks at albedo*" and "i don't trust you-")

On the ask sent by @.2broschilininahottub (long url), they had certain words highlighted and it reads, "You are brainwashed by Albedo". The response seem to show confusion as they said that they weren't brainwashed and to not slander Albedo like that.

On the third day of EBG, 'Albedo' goes over to Rin's laptop and seem to start manipulating it so that colored asks will now be considered uncolored. This proves his sentience, and the fact he has tampered with Rin's Tumblr more to the point they can't see it.

(As another note, the words, "amusing" has s being glitched out. And yes, he neglected showing his star right there.)

This is shown from an update to Rin when (in the video they recorded) that the asks became blank and shows the uncolored version right below.

Under the comments of the post update of 'Albedo' by day 3, peopled mentioned about the star and one of them said to write ta name and they'd rescue them (as a follow up to their first words being 'is that a cry for help').

To Rin however, when they checked it, it looked to be blanked out and they asked what they were saying because they couldn't figure it out.

On my ask, I sent a hidden message that reads, 'Wake up, Rin. Albedo is keeping your memories hidden away'. However, due to his tampering, it looked normal with the original being deleted.

(Rin also mentions that the wind from Dragonspine is a little too loud, but they will try to listen to it in hopes thaty they can get some words or even make out what it was saying.)

@.2broschilininahottub sent another ask that mentioned that theis might be deleted, but the next words were glitched out.

@.the-travelling-witch sent an ask about Rin choosing Albedo, but they said that the stars chose him for them.

On the fourth letter by 'Albedo', it shows his sentience and the word 'fun' had f glitched out.

(He also briefly mentioned that he would be arriving at the place in around four to five days, which is the end of EBG.)

(Yes, it does prove he's a yandere).

The next ask sent by @.bi-inkstone had their messages glitched out, which seem to be them saying that 'Albedo' is self-aware/sentient and the song 'mastermind' was mentioned.

@.annoyinglyboredpoet sent 2 asks: one was a warning that was completely blacked out, and the other being to clarify with the words 'come back rin' glitched out, and 'KLEE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING RIN ITS ALBEDO WHO'S DOING THIS!! BELIEVE ME PLEASE!' scratched out.

In a post, Rin hosted a poll for an 'after-party' at the end of EBG. Although, the tags seem to read "and it can maybe act as a transition back to the normal blog..." "if y'all succeed that is" ":)", which DEFINITELY implies for everyone to try their hardest to snap Rin out of it and get them away from 'Albedo'.

The first person that was blocked by Albedo was @.abyssmal-skies, one of Rin's closest friends. They sent an ask to get 'Albedo', with the next saying that they know what he's up to and that Rin will remember. 'Albedo', though, seem to smugly say that it was unfair to indiscriminately blame him for the gaps in her memory.

I'll make another update for day 4 very soon- this is getting very convoluted holy shit-

Now that I've written like 2 drabbles of the EBG week (thanks to @.zhongrin's post abt it because it is FUELING my lore hungry brain) I have... A sort of theory to put it here.

Mostly to compose my own thoughts because after EBG I will most likely just compose it all in a neat little master list for future reading purposes + to hopefully continue on this little AU in my own pleasure. Yes I am very well aware it's just a game and no one has seen this little side blog (thank the Gods) so don't mind me just having this little thing running around wwwww)

That aside, I've been taking notes so far and it seems I can gather a few thoughts... One being that:

'Albedo' (Dorian) is sentient. He seems to be well aware of what's going on and on one of the posts, he has tampered with the system enough so that it would censor any sort of incriminating evidence that can crack his reality with Rin. It's a very interesting concept because he is also aware that the other anons (and mutuals) are growing concerned and are most likely trying to get Rin out of the situation.

As of February 19, 2023 (Day 2 of EBG), Albedo has tampered the system of Tumblr. He has also shown signs of doing it via blank asks and is actually smug about it on @.ainescribe's ask at exactly February 18, 2023. Upon looking closer on the photo, he has also neglected showing the star on his neck.

In one of the asks, @.mixed-kester seem to ask on how long they've been together, and it is implied that it has been forever. Alongside that, there was something interesting in a sense that the following words, "I barely remember what my life was like before meeting him". This can be taken by face value as an exaggeration, but now that we know he's sentient, it is possible that he has tampered with Rin's own memories.

On one of the answers from Rin, there was one brief moment where they wrote, "a cry for help? Comrade no one's crying for help" wherein the word 'help' has been glitched out. This came from @.annoyinglyboredpoet as they brought up another point wherein the words, "all is good :)" was in bold.

There's more to dig up but as of right now, this is the current leading points of evidence. If Albedo (Dorian) is a smart individual, he must've done a lot of preparation to get Rin and maybe even dug deep into the research of locking a person's memories... Or erasing them.

[henry-and-the-seven-lords]

Hello @gluttonousfruit you are in fact my first request. (I did not forget about you in moving my blog.) I am super excited to have anyone ask me to write something! Also I would love to be friends! Feel free to message me through asks or in private DMs! I hope you enjoy the imagine!

Warnings: Fluff with a small amount of angst because Levi doubts himself 😞

Brothers Masterlist | Dateables Masterlist

Levi with an Animator S/O

"Okay MC, I know we just finished 'Swimming Only Leads to Hot Mermaids,' but I was thinking since we are already watching otomes, we should watch another series that everyone is recommending online!" Levi says this as he begins to pull out one DVD and place in another while bouncing on the balls of his feet like an excited puppy.

"I guess I could watch one more series, but it better be a good one. Sure the mermaids were attractive, but there wasn't much of a plot." MC says with a yawn. A quick look over to the clock, and it reads 11:48 PM in a blinding blue light. Not too late for one of Levi's normal bingefests, but a little too late for MC when they have classes tomorrow.

"No, I promise this one is good. Everyone is talking about the art style. They say it is so original that it's captivating." Levi walks to the small futon briskly and plops himself down next to MC as he continues to ramble about the art. His voice slowly trails off as the opening begins to play.

As the music fills MC's ears, they perk up and a small smile appears on their face. "Levi, could this perhaps be, 'I Went to Hell For a Weekend and Got Stuck in a Love Heptagon with Seven Incubi'?"

Levi faces MC in shock. The look on their face is quite smug. (In all seriousness, it reminds Levi of Mammon when he wins poker, but he doesn't want to be think about his brother while looking at MC. So he pushes that thought away.) This anime came out only the day before their bingefest. And even then, Levi had this copy pre-ordered for this very occasion and it arrived before any stores were selling physical copies. There is no way a normie like MC could have heard about its release. Does this mean MC isn't such a normie after all?

"You heard of this show already?" The surprise in his voice was impossible to hide.

"Yeah, I have heard of it." MC smiles and chuckles quietly, "I have never actually seen it, but I have heard the opening quite a few times."

"Oh..." Levi sighs. He was so stupid. Of course MC had heard the opening. It is all over his Devilgram and they were on their phone for part of the last show, so they obviously just heard it on there. Levi deflates looking solemn. It was just a pipe dream that MC would ever be interested in his yucky otaku interests.

"Hey! There is no reason to be all sad just because I know the name of the show. I still haven't seen the whole thing. My first time watching will still be with you Levi, isn't that special enough?" The smile on MC's face seemed sincere enough, but the words that came out of their mouth made blood rush up to Levi's cheeks. Their first... did they really mean to say it like that?...

As thoughts begin to flood Leviathan's head the show began. It was true the art style was captivating. So captivating in fact, that he forgot about his embarrassment. But MC's words still lingered in his mind as he watched the show.

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"Well, I am dead tired." MC stands cracking their aching joints as they look at the clock. 2:37 AM. It was that late already? "I think I need to head to bed Levi. I have classes in the morning and I need at least a few hours of sleep."

"Are you sure?" Levi was just starting to enjoy MC's presence. At the beginning of the night, he was on edge trying to make everything perfect. Levi did want to mess up by being a yucky Otaku and give them a reason to leave him all alone. But as the night progressed, (and more snacks were consumed) he felt increasingly more comfortable with sharing his favorite shows with MC. "I have other shows we could watch to pass the time, or we could play this new game I got-"

MC walks over to Levi and gently sets their hands on his shoulders, "Games and anime are great, but what I need right now is sleep." MC watched as Levi's face filled with a blush and his eyes flashed with hurt. "I am not leaving because I am mad... or sad... or anything really. I just need to sleep, Leviathan." Their voice was barely above a whisper as they said his name. How could he disagree with them when they said his name like that; all the while, looking deep into his eyes. He felt like he could explode.

As MC turns away, the demon in question then sighs mutters a quiet "okay" under his breath. "Don't worry, Levi. This isn't the last time I will watch anime with you. I promise we can do another one of these when another new anime comes out." MC begins to pick up their things. A blanket they brought with them to keep warm in Levi's cold room and the rest of their human snacks. "Besides, I really liked that one, and I have heard they are already making season two." As they speak, MC makes their way across the room to the gigantic tank.

"Wait. How do you-"

"Good night Henry. Good night Levi." And with that, MC leaves. Closing the door behind them.

How did MC know about a second season? Even he, the Great Otaku Levi, has not heard about a season two on any forums or on any other website... After thinking about it, Levi suspects it's probably on Devilgram like the opening was. To prove his theory, he pulls out his D.D.D. and opens up Devilgram to the 'I Went to Hell For a Weekend and Got Stuck in a Love Heptagon with Seven Incubi' page. He scrolls through their posts and finds the opening, like he predicted, but what he didn't predict was their most recent post.

"This show would not have been possible without MC. Thank you for making such a great story and great art to go along with it!"

Levi reads the caption once, twice, thrice and is speechless. The photo for this post is none other than his MC standing with a hand drawn piece of the protagonist. He can even see their signature in the corner when he zooms in! He knew that they liked to draw, but he never thought they would make an anime.

Without thinking, Levi gets up and begins to run to MC's room. He needs to know that this isn't some sort of elaborate prank that MC and Satan brewed up to make him like a normie more.

The door to MC's room busts open, "MC!" The room is completely dark except for the light shining in through the doorway.

"Levi...? Is that you? Is something wrong?" MC's voice is soft and laced with sleep. If this were any other time, Levi would have screamed over their cuteness, but today he had a mission. He immediately marches up to the half asleep MC and promptly shoves his phone in their face.

"Did you make 'I Went to Hell For a Weekend and Got Stuck in a Love Heptagon with Seven Incubi'?" MC sits up and squints as their eyes adjust to the blinding screen and look at the post.

"Um... yeah. That's me isn't it?" Silence takes over the room, before Levi begins to scream.

"WAHHHHH! MC, why didn't you tell me!" Thankfully with the phone only being pointed at MC, they can't see the blush spreading across his face.

"Well, I didn't want you to treat me differently because I make anime." Laying back down as they speak, MC tucks a pillow under their head and looks up to where they guess Leviathan's face is. "Besides, I thought it was really cute how you were fanboying, and I didn't want you to stop because you knew you were in the presence of the creator." A small smile makes it's way on to MC's face as Levi feels his own get hotter.

Now covering his face, Levi quickly makes his way to the door while muttering, "You can't just say things like that..." As he begins to close the door, he pauses and opens it up again while looking back, "Can you tell me more about your show tomorrow, MC?" His voice sounds small compared to his previous scream.

"Of course Levi. We can talk for as long as you like."

[virghogh]

Guessing NCT's rising signs: Huang Renjun as a Cancer rising

Welcome to my first post where I write all about why I think this idol is X rising sign! I don't know how many of these I'll do because it heavily depends on how confident I feel in my guess of their rising lol for Renjun's rising sign, it's something I've been sitting on for a loooong time just to see if anything else comes into my head. At the end of the day we really have no way to know for sure, even if the idols gives us their birth time it still has to be taken with a grain of salt! But it’s still fun theorize and to test your skills while learning at the same time. So for now I feel pretty confident sharing my thoughts on Renjun as a cancer rising.

Let’s ✨explore✨ why:

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧long post! *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

✦ Before I even decided to look up his chart layout, there were 2 characteristics of Renjun that initially led me to think he’s a Cancer rising. His eyes and his physique. His eyes aren’t necessarily as big as idols we’ve seen with moon in 1st, but they’re still very notable features of his physical appearance that he’s very well known for. They’re bigger, soft and dreamy, and sometimes look like he quite literally holds stars in his eyes. The biggest physical feature though is his, well, petite frame. Next to his eyes, renjun is also really well know for his smaller build. It’s even a well known inside joke amongst NCT, they all him “big shoulders renjun” (lol) because “for a guy” his shoulders a on the smaller side. Both of these physical attributes can also be identifying characteristics of cancer risings.

✦ So, in general I think he is a Cancer rising. But if we want to be more specific; I do think he is a 3rd decan Cancer rising which is the Pisces/Neptune ruled decan. I initially chose this because his house and planet placements just make so much more sense to me when the rising is in the 3rd decan (I'll get into that below), but after reading about the 3rd decan I also think it fits his personality really well! With the Neptune and Pisces influence, he's more on the open side of Cancer rising but more notably, 3rd decans are a lot more inclined to art/creativity and sometimes, music specifically. These people also have a very dreamy attraction about them. He also has his Venus trine ASC which can further add to this kind of creative vibe he gives off, but is also drawn to! It emphasizes the importance of aesthetics, art and creativity in his life. If you've never been on Renjun stan twt then you might not know that a lot of his fans see him as this incredibly dreamy and ethereal boy (as they should) and I can see why!

*:･ﾟ✧house and planet placements *:･ﾟ✧

Scorpio moon, Sagittarius Pluto in 5th:

✦ yea... just yes. Okay but actually, if you read my NCT Dream Hexaco x Birth Chart analyses, I talked a lot about his chart already because I really like it. As someone with a Scorpio moon, I can't help but be really interested in how his plays out. And I have to say, I am quite attached to this theory because I think his scorpio moon in 5th just. makes. sense. I'm not going to go much into the descriptions of the placements, I'm mostly going to stick to the house influence. We know that Scorpio moons have really intense emotions, they internalize everything and are just highly sensitive people to their environments. Renjun has been incredibly open about his mental and emotional struggles ever since being a kid. I've honestly never heard an idol talk about their struggle like he has. He even opened up recently about how a few years ago he had an art therapist that really helped him and lowkey changed his life. I feel like a lot of this can be reflected in his 5th house. The house of creativity, expression, creation. His 5th cusp is also in Scorpio. 5th house in water tend to be really drawn to arts and music. Having a Scorpio moon, a moon sign that can be quite guarded, in a fire house can also explain his readiness/openness to share his emotions and art. Also let's not forget his chart ruler is his Scorpio moon in 5th! What I've wrote above are big themes in his life, which we've seen.

✦ As for the Pluto in 5th. Because his 5th house is in Scorpio this would mean the 5th ruler is in 5th. I know it might not make sense at first because it's pluto and pluto is misunderstood. But it makes perfect sense to me. Pluto in 5th is a deeply passionate and creative placement. It bring so much energy to this house, and can even create a borderline obsession with themes of this house. With creating and expressing. But I could also see having this and his scorpio moon in this house bringing so much energy, it just kind of adds to the confusion and intensity of a scorpio moons emotions and processing abilities, like, emotionally overwhelming. Scorpio moons always need an outlet and they usually figure that out the hard way at some point in life. The outlet can vary based off the chart, his is without a doubt connected to his art; whatever that may be to him.

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Aquarius Uranus in 8th:

✦ This part is brief because it's more of like, additional details to what's already in his chart. Something that is really well known about Renjun too is how much he is into space and aliens and stuff like that. He, once again, has been very open about it lol on variety shows I've seen him light up every time its briefly mentioned and he'll comment on how much he finds that stuff interesting. The 8th house is weird, it can manifest in a lot of different ways. The biggest point here for me is that the house is in Aquarius with Uranus here. I know someone with this placement too and, while they're open minded to astrology and tarot etc. it's a bit more focused on logic. I can't say for sure because I don't know him, but he kind of strikes me as the kind of person that would fight to death over aliens existing, but draws the line at astrology lol. I actually do think he would be open to astrology and tarot, but he'd need the right introduction to it. Anyways, yea this placement to me explains a lot of his interest in space and things we don't understand. He's expressed his curiosity in it. I think a lot of this is coming from his Scorpio moon and Pisces mercury/venus which is why I think it's just additional support.

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Pisces Mercury/Venus in 9th:

✦ THIS HOUSE right here... so much to say. Firstly, Pisces in 9th is probably one of the main culprits for his creativity, deep thinking and curiosity in the world. And more importantly: his imagination. I've mentioned this a lot when I talk about renjun but, he's very well known for his creativity, but I want to make it clear that there is a distinction between creation and imagination. His imagination is truly... on another level. Well, planet actually since it's pisces! Again, amongst fans it's really well known his imagination is just so unqiue. This is less about the 9th house and more about the fact that he has 2 pisces placements but it still affects it lol. He's very open about his imagination and speaks about it so naturally. He shared his drawing of a bird, hybrid, thing? and how it's an animal that steals your dreams in your sleep. Anyways, Pisces in 9th aren't necessarily the travelers we'd see with an air or fire sign here, but they like to travel mentally. He's also talked about how he's just in general a very curious person and you can tell his thoughts probably travel far and wide in his down time.

✦ What's really interesting to me about this house is his mercury is here and Mercury in 9th is a very specific kind of placement. It almost always guarantees an interest and talent in learning languages. I don't know if languages are necessarily a passion for him but he definitely is interested and cares about learning language and other cultures. He also did pick up on Korean and English with ease. Which also reminds me that, he actually was exposed to Korean at a young age because I'm pretty sure he went to a bilingual school (chinese and korean). This is also a big deal to me because planets in 9th, especially sun/mercury often indicate very early exposure to languages or other cultures... so yea that checks out. This can also be proved by looking at his IC in Virgo, which puts the ruler in 9th. His mercury is also sextile Jupiter. I also wanna comment that he has his Mercury in the 5th degree, I'm not great at degree theory yet but that feels significant to me. Of course we cannot forget his absolutely angelic voice. Renjun is also very well known for his stunning vocals. Not only are Pisces placements musically inclined but Pisces mercury are known for their sweet voices.

✦ As for the venus is 9th, I feel like I have more to say on his venus being in Pisces because that's where so much of his artistic creativity and imagination come from. But venus here adds to a lot of what I've written above, adding to his curiosity of the world. What I find most interesting about venus in 9th though, is it brings another inclination to art! He might really like art from different places in the world, or just exploring all types of art being very open minded to its different forms etc. Venus here also brings ease to language learning, and these people will naturally have other cultures and people from them as a big part of their life. I feel like, in general it's not surprising at all to me that as a foreign member (being from China), that he would have 9th house influence! It can often manifest as like.., travel, other languages, cultures and parts of the world etc. are just very naturally a part of their life. Some people never really contemplate life overseas or in another country. But for 9th housers, it's never not been an option. His 9th house influence can also make him a great teacher, mentor and just overall supportive person. We've seen some of this in the content he's made with NCT. Like trying to teach his members chinese with Chenle, except he was taking it way more seriously lol but was so supportive. He's also tried to get Jeno and Jisung involved in his art making, but keeping the process very open and fun.

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Aries sun, Taurus mars in 10th:

✦ This is the last part I'm going to cover because it is really just the icing on the cake to finish this up. The 10th house is considered pretty important when looking at celebrities/idols because it's very likely a lot of what we see from them is their 10th house influence. In the chart model I'm using for Renjun, it puts his MC in the very last degrees of Pisces, so there's a chance it's in Aries but either way with his sun and mars here they are still playing a big role. So for that reason, I'm opting for Pisces MC. I also think Pisces MC fits though because first it puts the ruler in his 7th house. Meaning he could really benefit and work well in something that involves a group! Because it's Pisces in Neptune, it also adds to his very ethereal vibe and how people just seem to love him wherever he goes. He's very magnetic and can come off as artistic and sensitive. He's known for being dreamy, unreal, artistic, sensitive.

✦ Again, we know he has an aries sun and taurus mars so I'm not going to explain them here, just how they affect the house, but having his these here makes so much sense to me too. Having planets in 10th also influences what kind of "vibe" people get from you, and what you're "known" for. Mars and Sun bring similar energy of being well known for for energy, drive, and even stage presence. Not being afraid to be on stage, being good with attention and spotlight. He's known for his kind of playful and childish behavior at times. He is charismatic, bold, brave, happy and upbeat. With the sun, he is again known for his creativity and creations and also self-expression.

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Thank you to anyone who read all this. I don't really expect many people to because I'm mostly writing this for my own curiosity and to finally just put this theory out there! Anyways, stan Renjun best boy <33

Thoughts and feedback are always welcome <3

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[ladyc0312]

A Jikook Guide to RunBTS: 112-121

Yes, I'm still doing these! It's just happening more slowly than I'd like because writing for work + writing fic + trying to go to bed before midnight + so much amazing content being released that clearly must be poured over and dissected = less time to make guides. For anyone still with me, he's the next section!

Ep 112 “Dalbang School Part 1” (Ep: 5 / KM: 4)

The ones with BTS in a classroom driving Teacher Jin insane

5:58 - JM declares that he and Taehyung will pair up (by being the first to hug each other in a game), but then when Hobi blows the whistle at 6:38, JK runs over to hug JM before Tae can get to him.

6:58 - Jin asks why JM said he wanted Tae and then hugged JK. JM explains that he didn't hug him, he just found himself in JK's hug as JK cackles in the background.

7:24 - When Jin blows his whistle at the class, JK and JM mirror each other in putting a finger in one of their ears.

7:35 - Teammates JK and JM are immediately on the same page about wanting their team name to be Kim Seokjin. When they have to change it, JM quickly picks up JK's suggestion that they call their team Bang Sihyuk. These don't sound like particularly unique moments, but when you watch it, it just really strikes you how in sync the two of them are in terms of physicality, ideas, and sense of humor.

9:52 - After Jin comments that he heard JM did very well in school, JK adds that JM was the top student. When someone else asks if JM was the best or second-best, JK forcefully reiterates that he was the best student.

12:45 - When they get a question right, JK and JM clasp hands and bump their shoulders together.

13:10 - JM and JK both goof around, speaking in satoori and challenging JHope to a fight of sorts.

13:27 - When Jin repeats that they got the question right, JK and JM do exactly the same as 12:45, but seated this time.

14:22, 14:36, 15:13 - In all three of these moments, JM nearly falls over laughing at something JK did that no one else found anywhere near as funny.

23:36 - When JK says he's good at this game, JM laughs and pokes JK in the chest with a marker.

BEHIND 2:30 - JM takes a selfie of him and JK with his personal phone while they're supposed to be paying attention to Jin.

6:35 - JK cheers on JM and calls him Jimin-ssi when JM announces he's doing well on this spot-the-difference round. When Jimin modifies the brag to say he only found four, JK says "that's still quite impressive."

Ep 113 “Dalbang School Part 2” (Ep: 5 / KM: 4)

4:50 - We all know how JK is when he gets into his "focus" zone, especially in a competitive environment. But here, when JM rather rudely interrupts JK's melodica practice, JK just starts playing around with him and giggles.

7:41 - As RM & JH take their turn, jikook are whispering to each other in the back row.

11:42 - After quickly agreeing on a lunch option, jikook do a high five / handshake thing and then JM says "we think alike" and "we get along pretty well." JK responds "that's exactly it" and the on-screen captions tells us they are a "good match."

22:20 - This is where JK and JM start switching back and forth carrying each other on their backs to get under a limbo stick.

They go again at 23:35, 26:11, and 28:13.

And again at 30:22 and 32:16 and 34:30 because, even though they lost, they want to try to do it again to show that they can as a "matter of pride."

25:00 - JK points something out to JM and then pats his butt.

33:33 - JM announces they lost, and then jikook do another handshake / high five thing.

34:33 - JM does an... interesting pose for the camera where he puts his hand on a bent-over JK's back and smirks.

34:56 - Yet another handshake and JM pats JK on the back when they finally pass the limbo challenge.

BEHIND 5:55 - While examining the limbo setup, JM comments that JK is good at this. JK comes over to give a demonstration and JM watches him be silly with it and says "he's a strange kid" fondly.

6:21 - Another jikook limbo attempt - this one was cut because they did it too easily.

Ep 114 “League of Number One Part 1” (Ep: 3 / KM: 1)

The ones where BTS play games with League of Legends world champions

3:55 - After Jimin protests that he shouldn't be out, JK tells his hyung to turn around and face the back.

14:40 - JK fake-boxes JM after losing the hammer game.

18:18 - JK mimics Jimin's BWL intro.

Ep 115 “League of Number One Part 2” (Ep: 2 / KM: .5)

BEHIND

7:05 - JK comes over to check on Jimin's phone to make sure he's actually visible in the selfie the teams take.

Ep 116 “Team-Building Special Part 1” (Ep: 4 / KM: 1)

The ones with random games in that rec room-looking place that are a lot more fun than they sound

22:14 - JM and JK play around with the jump rope during breaktime.

22:26 - JM and JK play around like they're boxing with each other.

BEHIND 5:15 - JK appears to take an interest in watching JM's... back as he moves around acting out potential poses.

Ep 117 “Team-Building Special Part 1” (Ep: 4 / KM: 2)

5:30 - Despite showing pretty much everyone else touching everyone else in the pose guessing game, we don't get a single shot here or in the behind of JK feeling up Jimin. The above photo proves that it happened, though, so definitely side-eyeing the editors, here.

BEHIND 5:35 - JK keeps throwing water bottles when they're supposed to be taking a group photo. Jimin pulls him back next to him and puts an arm around his neck. JK puts an arm around Jimin's shoulders in return.

7:51 - After it's explained that JK is staying late to watch Jin do his penalty, a packed-up Jimin comes over and stands next to JK, waiting until they're done to leave.

Ep 118 “Photo Story Part 1” (Ep: 3 / KM: 3)

The ones where BTS play a Samsung-sponsored game involving getting specific pictures while a spy tries to ruin the fun

4:22 - JM appears to direct JK to go punish Tae and pats JK's back when he starts to obey. Something happens that we don't see when the angle changes - next thing we see, JM seems to be pushing JK? JM then giggles at JK pretending to beat up Tae. (After this, JK spins around like a ballerina. Not jikook-related, just adorable.)

29:51 - JK calls Jimin twice without adding "hyung."

32:28 - JM pulls JK along by the wrist. Meanwhile, J-Hope once again mixes up their names.

32:44 - Though there is now a group walking slowly together and he doesn't need to pull him along anymore, Jimin takes JK's hand again.

37:02 - There are a bunch of seats open in the room, but Jimin walks over to sit right next to JK.

BEHIND 5:40 - When JM tries to steal a post-it from JK, JK scolds him in satoori banmal. JM calls him out for not calling him with hyung and JK quickly apologizes (in a way some k-army jikookers have said is like how a married person would respond to their nagging spouse!).

6:09 - JK and JM meet up and JK tells JM he's exhausted. There's a kind of weird moment that I fully admit I may be reading too much into where JK seems to be walking right towards JM, then abruptly stops and turns, looking at the camera, before walking with Jimin in a different direction than he had been heading. Then, JM says he thinks their matching shirts are hilarious and that it's funny they're wearing them for the show.

Ep 119 “Photo Story Part 2” (Ep: 4 / KM: 3)

8:21 - "You are me, I am you" moment: Jimin does a ballet spin the same way JK did in part one.

11:18 - JK is the only one to vote for JM to be able to keep a picture in other than Jin (who has nefarious reasons for doing so).

29:40 - JM goes over to help JK see how many of his photos the spy ruined and almost falls over laughing when it becomes clear it's nearly all of them.

34:21 - JM puts his hand on JK's shaking leg to help calm him (see above photo), but JK is so irritated that it doesn't work like it usually does. Poor bunny!

35:17 - JM pulls at JK's shirt and hand, then folds over his back while trying to get him to confess that he actually lost.

38:24 - JM has a comforting hand on JK's neck when he's acting upset about losing.

38:32 - When it seems like JK is struggling to come up with an ending statement, JM helps prompt him.

BEHIND

0:55 - JK talks about how amazing it is that Jimin found so many cards.

3:51 - When JK is playing with the sequin art on the front of his shirt, JM leans over and starts rubbing on them, too.

5:11 - Jimin tells JK that, if he wins, he's going to make the loser hike Mt. Achasan. JK asks why he's looking at him when he says that and they both laugh. Jimin pats JK's chest and they laugh even harder. Jin and Tae both have "omg, these two" looks on their faces.

Ep 120 “Reply BTS Village Part 1” (Ep: 3 / KM: 2)

The ones with a real-life Mafia game inexplicably set in a 1970s village. It's... fairly difficult to follow, but the guys are into it and the outfits are great!

24:40 - Jimin breaks character and laughs when asking JK if he's the culprit.

29:40 - Caption: "The air is undeniably tense between Gamer Jeon and Chief Park." Not explicitly jikook, I just find it funny that the writers seem to be playing with some real life relationships, making sope best friends and jikook have tension that leads to banter...

BEHIND

5:34 - When Jimin is playing with the yo-yo, JK expresses concern that he's going to hurt his fingers (caption: Kook is just worrying for his hyung). Then, JK asks poutily and in banmal if he can play with the yo-yo multiple times and Jimins says no. Like, JK straight-up gives his hyung a command ("let me try that") using informal speech and no one bats an eye!

5:58 - Jimin starts singing a song about an ants. JK watches him. JK initially says to Hobi "look, he's a fool/dummy!" (in banmal again), then starts singing along. He jokes that JM doesn't know all the lyrics and Jimin says back "quiet, you."

Ep 121 “Reply BTS Village Part 2” (Ep: 3 / KM: 2)

38:48 - After having asked for it a bunch in the Behind of the previous episode, JK now has Jimin's yoyo.

non-jikook note: At the end of this one, they "time travel" to solve a mystery in Joseon-era Korea and I can't express how badly I want to see that. Please come back to that, Run!

BEHIND 0:58 - Jimin and JK play around accusing each other with exaggerated accents and formality. Jimin comes up behind JK and reaches out to touch his shoulder, but stops when Tae joins them and accuses them of plotting together.

9:05 - When JK says everyone else is so good at acting, Jimin compliments him that he was very funny towards the end.

[keylimeimagines]

Alright, thank you so much for the answer!

Now then, I would very much like to ask for a matchup for P5! ( Romantic ofc, I'm leaving it up to you if you'd also like to add platonic, considering romance is your main focus!!)

So I go by She/Her and They/Them, I honestly don't care about which pronouns are used.

I'm an ENFP - 9w1, Gemini Sun, Pisces Moon, Capricorn Rising!

I'm a demisexual, no preference for any gender really! They just gotta be nice yknow yknow

I would consider my love language to be.. quality time I think? Either that or giving gifts to others! On the other hand, I'm not too comfortable with physical affection,, dunno it's just rather awkward!! I do like myself some words of affirmation though,, that's some good shit I swear

Now, personality!!

It kinda depends on who I'm with- so starting with strangers and acquaintances:

I don't really go out all that often (or well.. at all) so I'm pretty awkward around strangers or well- in person in general. I'm usually pretty quiet around them and speak up when I'm spoken to really. I'm as I said super awkward so it's a bit exhausting to talk because I dunno I may be an extrovert but not knowing what to do and say is a bitch I tell you--

As for people that I'm comfortable around/online, I very much let all of that awkwardness go and throw it into the fucking trash HSJDB

I get really really excited and loud and also really chaotic! I like to joke around a lot and like to also sorta make fun of them if they are comfy with it- I am a bit stupid though so because I don't take cues very well so if it looks like they're joking to me when expressing discomfort then oops I'm proooobably not gonna be understanding it,,,

Ok seriously tho I have really high guilt so I like feel guilty for basically every shit imaginable. So, well, I tend to blame things on myself even if I didn't directly cause anything.

But yeah-

That was about it for SPECIFIC traits, here are some general traits!

Generally, I'd consider myself kind! I care for others needs more than mine and tend to forget about myself a lot- but hey! Others say that I'm easy to talk to!

I generally have a problem with taking things seriously! I dunno I just?? Can't get into the mindset of being serious when I need to be? Like I can't relate man- I just feel that a little joke will lighten stuff up y'know!!

Another problem is that I maaaaay bottle up my emotions a lot and then tell people not to do that like a dumbass lmao

Aaand I also am a lousy multitasker- Like I cannot concentrate on more than one thing- especially auditory things! So if I'm doing something it's gonna take like 10 tries to get my attention by just talking- honestly just come up to me and tap me on the shoulder a bunch of times

And lastly, I'm very impulsive! Like impulse spending included- if I think something is funny I'm doing/buying it. No questions asked.

Alright, onto my Hobbies!

I love to draw! I have been doing so for about 10 years now, and I'm not thinking of stopping anytime soon! 5 y/o me made the right choice to copy my sister with doing art as well >:)

I also love to play video games hehe- I prefer singleplayer, but I can do multi if I play with friends! Especially for stuff like Identity V- I'm not going in without at least one other person! That being said, my fav genres atm would probably be RPGs, Indies and horror! Horror doesn't give me the scares at all but it's amusing nonetheless!

I also really really love listening to music! I cannot go without it since I don't like it when theres a lot of people talking (either in general or to me)- my fav genre will always be Jazz or honestly Breakcore ATM!! It does the scritch scratchy on my brain well...

Oh and I also roleplay a lot I GUESS- I just have so many characters what would I ever do with them!!

I would say that I'm a fairly decent writer, I can definitely write a good few at most 10k character long response-

Uhm uhm other interests that aren't art, writing and music uhh

I find astrology very interesting!! It's just something I've been wanting to get into for sooo long but I never have time auuugh

I also am super super interested in psychology- it's so cool to research stuff and learn new things about the mindset of some people!

Thats- that's all I guess

As for habits!

- I tend to like bounce my leg up n down! And also move around a lot

- A big habit of mine is to ramble on with something and like explain shit really difficultly?? like like yknow uhhh I will talk about something but when I have to explain something it will not be a simple thing like- At fucking all.

- Im pretty sure being Impulsive is a habit? I already explained but- if I want to do something (preferably something that sounds funny) then I'm DOING IT. No questions asked. I will just go "Heheheh what if I do this" and most of the time everyone goes "DONT DO IT NO" and then I already have done it :>

- I like to bite at my nails, but I'm working on this one right now!! A, after I stop biting again that is- maybe I should get some nail polish again..

Uhhh I think that should be all? I'm super sorry if this is so long! English isn't my first language btw, so if there are some grammatical errors and such I apologize for those!

Anyway, please do take as much time as you need on this!! Oh oh, and do remember to stay hydrated n all!! ✨

The one I choose for you is....

Yusuke Kitagawa [ISFP]!!

He would love to spend time with you (quality time is also one of his love languages <33 whether it's just you with him while he's painting OR you're the one he's painting; he doesn't have a preference really (but painting you causes him to get this fluttering feeling since he's capturing you essence as he says)

He paints things for you and gives them to you as gifts! Along with other types of things he'd think you'd want <33

He also gets pretty awkward with physical affection, but he loves to complement you! he's very elegant and philosophical with the way he complements you tho

he doesn't really like to go out for dates often, so just staying inside and doing something is much for fun for him (and of course, painting dates are a thing)

He tries to remind you to take care of yourself as well! He does appreciate your kindness, but he also wants you to be happy as well!! we love a self-care king!!

when you have a problem with taking things seriously, he exactly the opposite - he takes almost everything seriously - but you too complete each other <33

ALSO since you bottle up your emotions and feelings (like he kind of does as well in a way), he'll always offer his shoulder if you need to let it out! he's a very good listener if you need it :))

he's very calm and collected, but despite how much he thinks Ryuji is annoying, he does appreciate your 'chaoticness' a bit

he'll try to help you calm your impulsivity, and your impulsive buying too! he's very understanding, so he won't criticize you for your habit, but try to help you overcome it!

he LOVES the fact that you also like art! albeit it's different forms of it (at least i think he only does painting? im not sure). like i said earlier, you two definitely have art dates <33

one of my headcanons for Yusuke would be that he cannot focus correctly if there isn't some form of music to sooth his mind. Bc of this, he always plays stuff like lofi or jazz, really just anything to help him focus on something (whether it be school work of painting)

he kind of wishes that he was talented in writing, even though he is actually pretty good

astrology isn't something that he's majorly interested in, but he would love to hear some facts and trivia you want to share! same goes for your interest in psychology (off topic but i also love psychology and all that sort <33 )

with your general impulsivity and when you wanna do something risky or something that may be considered dangerous, he just calmly tells you "no, you probably shouldn't do that" and just leaves it like that

artist bf is pretty cool ngl!! im jealous >:(

[aelaer]

First: welcome home & I hope you get the sleep you need to get back into your routines! Second: it's Feb. 2, a significant day to our beloved Stephen Strange. I know you're exhausted right now, and the timing is poor--but perhaps when you're up to, you could write a little one-shot about his feelings all these years later (is it 2022 or 2023?) on the anniversary of the accident that changed his life forever. Can't think of anyone better suited to write it! xx

This was sent a year ago but last month I planned to have it out for Feb 2nd, hah.

For canon, he comes back in 2023 in what I think was likely after Feb 2nd, so realistically he can address the anniversary again in 2024. It'd feel like only 3 years for him while, in actuality, it'd been 8. But when it comes to his experienced time versus actual passing time, Stephen's pretty messed up without the Decimation already (I'm not sure how I feel about the name of the "Blip" yet.)

The prompter also requested first person after I asked for more details, and I haven't ever written Stephen in first person so I thought I'd give it a go. I know first person isn't everyone's cup of tea, but if you're willing to give it a shot, call me very obliged.

Warning for canon compliance :P

——————

Staring Back In Time Rating: G (well, other than language)

An entry from the memoirs of Doctor Stephen Strange, Earth's Sorcerer Supreme, during his time as the Master of the New York Sanctum, several months after the Battle of Earth against Thanos:

February 2, 2024

Calendars don't mean as much as they used to. Once upon a time my life was ruled by the calendar. Consultation here, surgery there, society dinner over the weekend. Dates were important and generally set without change once marked down.

It doesn't work that way as a sorcerer. I keep a schedule, of course, one that marks down classes with apprentices and adepts and meetings with other Masters, never mind all the business outside of Kamar-Taj. But I learned early on that these set times shifted occasionally to accommodate the emergencies that the order often had to quash down, and it became obvious that as a Master, my schedule was more of a hopeful guideline than anything set in stone. Flexibility was a necessity.

Ever since my return to the living, keeping anything resembling a set schedule has been more of a laughable dream. Earth being the center of two universe-changing, Infinity Stone-powered events in a matter of hours did serious damage to the fabric woven about reality across the planet, and the Masters of the Mystic Arts are going to be dealing with the multidimensional repercussions for years to come. Nothing is predictable in my day-to-day anymore.

My relationship with time was fucked the moment I confronted Dormammu, so I can't say it's a large surprise that calendars have become mostly irrelevant.

If someone had told me that I, Doctor Stephen Strange, a man of order and precision, would learn to live with such unpredictability, I would have laughed in their face. But I'm not the man I once was (and thank God for that; that man was a dick). However, it's also because of this change that I didn't realize the day until it was nearly done.

I was reviewing my schedule for tomorrow, which I had set up on Google Calendar (Google had, naturally, survived the Decimation just fine, but like most other non-vital services, had many of their upcoming products delayed for years. But their email and calendar services continue to work great). Tomorrow's a Saturday, which means nothing in my world. My work continues on. The threats on our reality care little for weekends or holidays.

Still, it was only during this review, shortly before I planned to retire for the night, that I realized that today is February 2nd.

I won't ever forget the day, of course. It was both three years ago and eight years ago—or perhaps many lifetimes ago would be a more accurate description, though I lost track of time in both of my major journeys with the Time Stone. One day I'll write about them. Not now, but one day. Both memories are still too fresh.

The memory of the day of the accident, though? It feels both like yesterday and centuries ago. Some parts of the day are engraved in my memory like a film. I remember the last surgery down to the individual conversations. Christine's "thank you". Nick's watch. The cling of the bullet as I dropped it onto the tray.

I can remember my last conversation with Billy, too, in the car. Every damned word. But the drive itself is fuzzy, even in my head with my memory. I remember it began to rain during the drive, not beforehand, and I know the road was narrow and two-laned. I know I avoided a direct route to avoid traffic, driving first into Jersey before heading north and crossing the river again. But the rest is forgotten to time, or perhaps to trauma.

I was told that Billy was the first to call 9-1-1 as he heard the tearing of metal and shattering of glass before the connection was lost. The driver I hit—I learned much later that she escaped with only minor injuries—called a couple minutes later. But it was out in the mountains, dark, and raining. It took them hours to find me and extract me from the car.

Funny. Never thought I'd ever write about one of the worst days of my life like this. But I was told early on that personal journals were encouraged for all who stay in Kamar-Taj. Something about its therapeutic benefits was mentioned at some point. I only picked up the practice once I learned that each gifted journal was inaccessible to others until the time of their death, and after I mastered the art of enchanting a pen to write the words I spoke. Unfortunately this journal appeared to others after the Decimation, but Wong has reassured me that no one read it and it has since disappeared again from public view. 

Still, the point is that, one day, someone just might read this—account of a man who was part of an effort to save the universe. And it is difficult for a reader to judge my actions if they don't know how I was the one who ruined my life. My driving was reckless and stupid. I was running a little late, but it wouldn't have mattered in the long run had I been fifteen, twenty minutes, thirty minutes late. Not really.

Then again, I suppose it would have. I certainly wouldn't be here right now.

One could say that the accident and everything that has followed is some sort of penance for my hubris as a surgeon. I enjoy my newer abilities—quite a bit—but the responsibility that has come with them has not come without its own hardships and sacrifices. Perhaps the worst of the sacrifices were the ones I was unable to prevent others from performing, all for the sake of the universe.

Those sacrifices were made willingly, but I cannot help but feel responsible for them, regardless. 

During my first winter again returned to the living, when the days grew colder and my hands ached in the bad weather, and the only thoughts to accompany the pain were bitter, another thought was born. I was tempted, for the first time in a long time, to give it all up, restore my fine motor skills with channeled magic, and go back to the world I once knew, for a life much, much easier than this one is now. Even with all the troubles that had cropped up as people tried to reorganize a world that doubled in size overnight, it was miles away from the difficulties we were facing in Kamar-Taj.

Their sacrifices—the fates I pushed so many people towards—quelled the idea quickly. It did little to ease the physical pain or sting of guilt, but it lifted the temptation. And ever since that day, I have considered the situation and I don't think I will ever be tempted by the idea of giving up my duties for an easier, pain-free life again.

And I suppose that counts for something.

——————

(Hey look, my interest in geography's leaked again.)

I've always wondered where Stephen actually crashed mostly because New York City is *flat* and those mountains were *very much not flat*. I figured out the bridge that he crossed to get out of the city (there are like, 21 bridges that lead out of Manhattan) was the George Washington Bridge, and it leads to New Jersey—but that's not necessarily useful because it can quickly turn back into New York state if you turn north. We also know he crashed down into a body of water, which *might* be the Hudson, but also might not, but that the body of water is to his left, which narrows it down a bit. But again, not much. And the site of his crash is so dark in the videos and screenshots that I can barely tell what's on it. It looks like a bridge and some industrial building, so the Hudson's a good guess, but otherwise? Well, basically I turned on the topography part of Google maps and started searching.

The 202 on the east side of the river just north of Peekskill (again in New York) matches the movie road's windiness, height, and closeness to the river, and even has a bridge that could be just to the north of the crash site. Unfortunately the railing's off and there's no industrial building thingy by the bridge. It also makes the route out of the city via George Washington Bridge make no sense. Like the Stark Industries area in LA in the films, it's probably a completely fictional landscape.

But as I wasn't able to find a better locale that was still close enough to NYC to direct an emergency helicopter to, my headcanon for this scene is that he left via George Washington bridge to avoid some major traffic or something, crossed the river via the 287 a bit further up north to get back to the east side of the river, then went up the 9 to the 202. Unless someone who lives in the area can find the actual road he was driving (if it's real), this is what I'm gonna go with. (And if someone DOES please let me knowwwww). Funny enough, I don't see him getting led to *his* hospital totally unrealistic, because he'd need a very talented orthopedic surgeon with a specialty in hands to come in, and generally speaking a patient can be helicoptered to another hospital where such a surgeon is available. If Stephen is working at the Metro-General, it's likely they can afford a large cast of talented surgeons. So I don't think Nick was necessarily the lead surgeon in his case, just one of many necessary surgeons.

[bluepallilworld]

Ok I don't think the family is big enough so here 2 new kiddos...

older ref (5 years old) :

Birthday : 31/09 (2015 babies)

Twins

Vary is a girl

Shift is a boy

Shapeshifters

Padishiscuros (a specie I invented)

8 years old

Want to do everything together

Can and will shapeshift into a person near them

If there are more than one person, they choose one person (the same, they would be really distressed to look different) and change of target every so often

They actually copy the magic

But not the soul

So curses and other glitches don't affect them when they shapeshift

But they aren't given the manual on how to use the magic they copied

So if, for exemple, they shapeshift into Error. They would be able to produce strings but not to use them without a proper training

They aren't very solid physically (a bit foggy) when they are in their original form

But they are as solid as anyone when they shapeshift or when they sleep

They can't shapeshift in their sleep or inconscious

They always sleep together

They doesn't really like hugs, especially surprised ones

They will bite you if you do that

You can pet their head but that's all

The only hugs they accept are from each other

To recognize them when they shapeshift, it's not this hard. Just look at the eyebrows or the hands

To tell Vary and Shift apart physically ? Actually I won't tell you right now but there are a few differences

Vary is protective of Shift

She will bite you if she doesn't like you or if she become jealous- It's her brother not yours

She likes birds

Shift likes music and people with "musical" voices

Shift is always ready to play with Vary

He bites less than Vary

Shifting is something polite for them, they're adapting to their auditory

When they're alone, they're actually inconsciously copying each other appareance

They became really distressed if separated

They don't have any magic on their own apart of shapeshifting and copying magic

They love to play in the rain

Picky eaters

They have little pointy teeth (I'm not the best to draw teeth tho so you won't see it often

Yes balls for hand, if they focus they can have real hand but most of the time... Round hand thingie.

This 2 made a nest in the depths of Jonquille's laboratory (wich is the Alphys of Mynn's universe). Jonquille isn't aware that they're here since they often shapeshift into amalgamates. Jar (daughter of Jonquille!Alphys and Eyes!Undyne) discovered them and has a habit of bringing them food and she did them clothes. Lint found them while exploring the au and helps them leave the au quite often. The twins don't always sleep there and crash often into random homes. They aren't scared of strangers as far as they are together. They didn't learn yet to read or write but speak well.

17 years old version (future timeline)

Human version

Having fun with picrew 1

Christmas art

Meeting an idol

Wuss (art request for Solia)

*******************************************************

Awesome writing made by Drag' after I requested it

Vary and Shift as cotton candy (Drag's entry)

Cakes! (Red anon entry)

Care-free beans (Ari)

[bisluthq]

Roomate anon, hi babe! ❤️ First of all I just wanted to say that I am so so happy that you managed to work out your thoughts and admit to yourself that you're gay, that's so good for you! Some of us take years and years to even start accepting that part of ourselves. Also, you don't have to go and tell your family and friends right away hun, you have all the right to decide who gets to know this part about yourself because you feel safe and comfortable with them knowing.

You're so brave and admirable and from what you've shared with us, I can tell that you genuinely are a sweet, kind, and compassionate person who cares about others and tries her best at everything. Those are such lovely qualities to have ❤️ PLS tell us what happened when you talked to roomie! Your story is so beautiful and it's safe to say that we're all rooting for you, sending you love, and wishing you the best😍❤️

Now, in reference to Tay's gay sounding songs, I 100% agree with you on Dress and Delicate. Without the backstory of Swiftwyn, those two songs are very sapphic and really capture the feeling of a sprouting wlw relationship. Nat has a very good lyric by lyric interpretation of Dress somewhere in the blog if you wanna check it out, I feel the same as her in regards to that song.

To me personally (and I think many here will agree), Treacherous sounds very gay too bc of all the "I'll do anything you say if you say it with your hands" and "forever going with the flow, but you're friction". Imo Begin Again is somehow gay as well, bc of all the comparing a past "he" that didn't understand you or treat you the way you would like, and currently being with a "you" (female imo) that thinks you're funny and endearing, can relate to you, and treats you the way you wanna be treated.

Wonderland is... pretty gay idk. Like the rs it talks about goes into trouble bc "whispers turned to talking and talking turned to screams" as in people started to find out about them and being judgy. Not to mention "too in love to think straight" which speaks for itself haha.

I hear wlw in It's Nice To Have A Friend. It sounds to me like two high school friends who are actually more than friends but don't yet know it and, like you a few weeks ago (it's okay we've all been there ❤️) , think "aw it's so nice to be straight girls and be best friends and be able to just kiss and sleep together, isn't it so nice that bffs can do that".

Seven. Holy shit that song called me out so loudly lmao. Seven is about two different themes imo: 1) the beauty of being a little kid and not having to worry about anything and just playing and running all day. As a kid we're very free spirited and imaginative and, in my case, happy to play in the trees and the mud and just be wild 2) being seven years old and looking at one of your girl classmates in school and loving/memorizing very specific physical features of theirs like their hair (like a pattern), their freckles, their dimples etc and also thinking "we should run away together and live a cool life like superheroes or dancers or animal rescuers (me haha)". At that age we don't really know it or understand it, but those are early romantic feeling towards another girl. I could go on and on about this song tbh.

I agree with you in that August has a wlw vibe to it. Idk if it's the nostalgia, the cottagecore of it all, or the lamentation of a love that could not last for whatever reason but the energy is there. "Wanting was enough, for me it was enough to live for the hope of it all" and all of that you know.

Ivy is imo a fraction of a wlw story set during winter in like the 1700s or 1800s. The narrator is a widow whose husband died recently and she's having a romantic thing with one of her female friends, but the friend's engaged to be married to a man (as in her hand has been promised to him because that's how things worked during those times, marriages were often arranged by families), so the whole thing is a secret affair, which is why she says "your touch brought forth an incandescent glow, tarnished but so grand": her friends touch sets her insides on fire bc of how much she's attracted to her, but the touch is "tarnished" bc the whole thing is forbidden, yet it's "so grand" because it's meaningful and their love is very real.

"And the old widow goes to the stone everyday, but I stay here grieving for the living" = a widow would usually go to visit their husband's grave and lament his passing, but the narrator doesn't do this because she doesn't (and probably never did coz you know she's gay) feel any deep love towards her husband, she doesn't really miss him, and instead she prefers to focus on the love and infatuation she has for her female friend, and she grieves that they can't actually be together in a normal way bc of society at that time.

But they really are deeply in love with each other and it breaks the narrator that they can't spend their lives together as a couple : "goddamn my pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand". Yet they continue to love each other, spend time together, and be magnificently cursed while sitting down to talk for hours while drinking the narrator's dead husband's wine, because she doesn't really care that it used to belong to her husband; it has no significant value to her in that sense so she prefers to drink it with her lover.

"Clover blooms in the fields, spring breaks loose the time is near, what would he do if he found us out" : the bridge explains that winter has passed, spring is coming, and the wedding date for her lover and her bethroved husband is getting nearer (aka they're running out of time to be together). They discuss the possibility of attempting to keep their secret rs even after the marriage, but they fear of what would happen if the husband found out: "he's gonna burn this house to the ground", the house being their romance.

Still, the narrator insists that her lover will always be in her mind and in her otherwise cold ("my house of stone") heart ("your ivy grows and now I'm covered in you"). She claims that she will forever remember and hold on to the "moments that they stole, on begged and borrowed time", which suggests that they don't end up together, not even in secret. Sorry I got carried away but my mates I could write a whole ass novel about this song, I already have the narrator and her lover well developped in my brain and I have some pretty solid ideas for side characters lol.

Cowboy like me has sapphic aspects to it. "Takes one to know one" makes me think of how a lot of gay people have very on point gaydars and can sorta tell when someone pings haha. Idk Tay really loves Joe in a gay way and I love them for it haha.

And lastly what even is Dorothea lmao like is there even a non-gay explanation for that song? It's a fictional setting and fictional characters but Tay hun you really know how to capture the feeling of having been in love with a girl and now seeing her from far away huh. I mean it could be accidental but still👀 the song sounds gay to me idk.

Those are just off the top of my head and my personal opinion. At the end of the day, we can relate queer experiences to all sorts of songs and all lyrical interpretations are valid. That's what art is all about 😊.

💯

[adhd-asd]

Do you have any advice for ADHD writers? I'm still trying to find a workaround for "I need to do that boring scene but it's physically impossible and painful to make myself write it". Plus you can't really write books/comics if you drop literally every project you start

     I’m not much of a writer myself so I’m not sure how much help I can really be but I’ll try! I employ something similar to a lot of these tips when it comes to my art and even just everyday living, so maybe they can be applied to writing in some ways too.

Skip it. If a scene is boring right now, put a placeholder (preferably in large or colourful font so you don’t forget about it later) and move on. Maybe writing what comes next will inspire the events that lead up to it.

Make it less boring. Can you change something about the scene to make it more appealing, both to write and possibly to read? Have your exposition occur during an action scene or have a quiet moment take place in a location that you particularly enjoy describing.

Get rid of it. Does the scene need to be there or can you communicate the same information/plot points in a different part of the story?

Write the first thing that comes to mind. Sometimes you just need to get a garbage first draft down and then you can worry about editing it and making it good later. Start with the worst, simplest sentences you know (or even just bullet points) to get the relevant ideas somewhere other than in your head.

Write it out of order. If starting a boring scene is giving you trouble, maybe ending it and then working backwards or jumping around to different places will be easier.

Write it how you would say. I often have to describe what I’m doing verbally as I do it to keep myself on track, so maybe you could try describing the scene out loud and then write it exactly as you’ve said it. Include every “um” and half finished sentence, then go back and weed out the actually story afterwards.

Set the mood. I know some ADHDers consider music a distraction while others (myself included) can’t do anything without it. If you’re in the latter camp, try finding a song that really sets the tone for the scene and helps you get into it.

Remember that done can be better than perfect. A finished good project is probably better than a perfect nonexistent one. If you find the pressure to write something amazing is stopping you from writing at all, give yourself the freedom to be mediocre once in a while. Being able to say “it’s good enough” has gotten me through a lot of my art. Plus, no one consuming your work will know what was “supposed” to be there, so they won’t have any hypothetical superior version to compare it to.

     Bonus: Write what works for you. I’m hesitant to include this one because it’s less of a tip and more of a… “something to consider”, but I can speak from personal experience when I say I don’t have the attention span to put more than maybe a dozen hours into any single project and, for me, that’s a limitation I’m learning to work within, rather than around. I limit myself to short form writing and simpler artworks because I know I can finish them before I get bored and that’s been a lot more enjoyable for me as a creator. Obviously this isn’t helpful if you’re committed to producing larger works, but if you find yourself running into this problem consistently, maybe a change of medium would be less frustrating for you.

     Calling all ADHD writers! What problems do you experience while writing and what strategies have you found to help deal with them?

[bakugouscentedcaramel]

Ah yes, the time has come.

It's time to get your pen and paper because class is in session!

There's plenty of things I could talk about and I pretty much covered the basics down below, but I'm more than willing to help y'all out with anything specific!

I have to preface that I'm not an English major by any means nor do I have any experience writing professionally, the things listed below are purely based on my opinions and submissions I have received.

Writing is forever a learning process, there really isn't a right way of writing but there are definitely some things that will hinder your readers. Here is a list that I compiled both with my own experiences as well as some user submitted issues when it comes to reading works:

•Big blocks of text

° Typos/wrong word usage

•Using the same words

°Too spaced out/not indented where needed

• Dialogue runs into normal sentences

° Speakers/POVs change without notice

• Inconsistencies, either in general or story inconsistencies

°Lack of description/Too much description

• Bland/Artificial actions/dialogue

° Misuse of punctuation/lack thereof

• Capitalization errors

° Long winded sentences

• Using italics for actions

° Confusing formating

• Changing in Tenses

° Using wrong tags/falsely advertising (ex. Reader x Blank should have Y/N, not an OC/Authors name)

• Author notes/comics/pictures in middle of fic

° "~This is a transition~"

• Forcing a character to be OOC for sake of story

° Filler characters

• Not sticking to a specific genre/jumpy moods

Now don't be intimidated by this list! Some of these are pretty self explanatory so I won't go into a few of them. There are plenty of ways to avoid these and in some cases it is perfectly fine to use any of the above. 

Let's start off with the basics!

Sentence structure is the backbone of writing, but it's a very flexible rule. Obviously you have your subject, verb, object and whatnot, but the true art lies in word choice and length.

When it comes to sentences, size does matter. If your sentences are too short they will seem choppy and unfinished, whereas if they are long they will seem winded and unnatural. The biggest tool you can use to find out if a sentence is too short/long is by reading it aloud! If you run out of breath it's too long but if you finish abruptly it's too short.

Word choice is my favorite weapon to work with, I could describe a blue jay as a normal bird or as a mythical animal just by picking the right words!

"The blue jay flew across the field while it sang it's melody."

Or

"A creature with wings made of clouds swooped across the field whilst roaring out a devilish tune."

Word choice can easily convey tone/feeling so it's definitely an important element to writing! If you ever have trouble finding that perfect word try googling for synonyms! Also this website might help you find that one word that you just can't think of!

Grammar is also a very important part of writing. Using the right words and punctuation can be difficult sometimes but there are some easy fixes!

Spelling is an easy fix, if you forgot/don't know how to spell a word consulting a dictionary or Google is a surefire way of solving your problem. You can even find synonyms if you feel like you've used a word too much. 

Punctuation on the other can be a big more difficult, however. 

Here's a couple of sentences that helped me learn basic punctuation:

A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink then leaves. Commas are a means of sewing two sentences together to form a compound sentence. These are mainly used to list out things and to add fluidity to your works so they don't sound as choppy.

A question mark walks into a bar? Question marks are pretty self explanatory. They either raise a question or form uncertainty.

Two quotation marks "walk" into a bar. Quotations are used for both dialogue and metaphors. I personally love using them for sarcasm!

A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to drink. This one is a tougher one that I personally never learned from any of my classes. A gerund is basically a word that can act as a verb or a noun which would be "drinking". An infinitive is the base of a verb, in this case it's "drink".

The bar was walked into by a passive voice. A passive voice is when you emphasize the action and object of a sentence rather than the subject. You can find that a passive voice tends to use past tense where as an active voice uses present/future tense.

Three intransitives walk into a bar. They sit. They drink. They leave. An intransitive verb is an action verb, expressing a doable activity like arrive, go, lie, sneeze, sit, die, etc.

Some other things that I commonly see are the wrong usages of words. For example:

They: a group of individuals/pronoun "Yeah, they said he'd be here thirty minutes ago."

Their: a possessive pronoun "Leave their stuff alone!'

There: location "What's that over there?"

Then: event/action "Val went to the mall then skittered to the park."

Your: possessive "Your self esteem is lower than the Mariana's Trench!"

You're: a conjunctive "you are"

Affect: caused by actions "The fallen french fry really affected Val's mood."

Effect: caused by events "Climate change has a negative effect on my Cheerios."

Peaked: a summit "Val has peaked at 10:19pm"

Piqued: stimulate interest/curiosity "You have piqued Val's interest by mentioning food."

Do time: "Val is fixin' to do time if she keeps slacking."

Due time: "Val will come with hydration in due time."

Per say: not a thing

Per se: by/in itself "She didn't write this late at night, per se…"

There are different tools you can use to spice up your writings, from metaphors to innuendos, all the way to zeugmas! Let's go over the basic definitions of these bad boys.

Metaphor: a figure of speech that is not literally applicable. "The darkness surrounded us like a shroud." Obviously the darkness can't physically shroud anyone.

Innuendo: a sentence with a hidden meaning "Is that a gator in your pants or are you just happy to see me~" 

Zeugma: a sentence containing words that can be used literally and figuratively, like a love child of the two above. "Val and her coupon expired last week." This implies that not only did my Colgate coupon expire, but I died as well.

Paragraphs are a necessity when it comes to writing. Big blocks of text are an eyestrain to readers and it's easy to lose your place, even if it's only 150 words. It's always best to use Tab or at least 5 spaces when indenting. A paragraph should only be 5-7 sentences long, this is so it's not just multiple blocks of text

When to add a new paragraph:

° A new person comes in

• New idea/context

° Setting changes

• New person is speaking

° Time changes

• The "camera" moves

° Tone shifts

• 5-7 sentences has been reached

Paragraphs help you organize your work in a way and they make it easier for your readers' eyes!

POVs are also very important. First person and third person are by far the most common ones so I'll only touch on these two. It's very important to write a story in one strict POV as to not confuse the readers. You can however jump perspectives like Heroes of Olmpyus by Rick Rodian, as long as the ready can easily tell who is telling the story.

First person is a story that is told from first-hand experience. It's the same as if I told y'all the story on how I almost chopped off my thumb in woodshop class back in middle school. First person tends to use a lot of I's and my's

Third person is a story that is told from a narrators' point of view. Such as "Once upon a time" type of stories. I's and my's should only be used in dialogue

Dialogue is probably one of the most important features of any fic/story. Dialogue can push plots forward as well as add life to a character. Here's a simple exchanged:

"Hiya 'Splodey," Val chirped.

Katuski smirked, "M'dumbass."

Dialogue should always come with a pair of quotation marks. Commas and periods generally go inside the quotation marks whereas dashes, colons, and semicolons almost always go outside the quotation marks. Question marks and exclamation marks however can go either inside or outside, it goes by a case by case basis. Always indent whenever a different speaker is talking, running quotes into each other is a no-go because it causes confusion and eyestrain.

You have to be wary of using simple dialogue exchanges though, if they seem off try saying them out loud! Dialogue is one of my favorite things to write because you can weave personality into them, not to mention you can always hear people talking to get a better idea on how to write dialogue.

For example, I have a southern dialect, meaning I sound different than someone from the north! I use words like "y'all", "fixin'", "finna", "ain't" and have a different vocabulary than that of my northern friends. This means that the characters you're portraying should have their own way of speaking! This will not only add flavor to your dialogue but it also adds to their personalities/backgrounds.

Describing things can be just as valuable as dialogue, but it is a bit more complex. Sure we've all heard of the "show, don't tell" rule. Which is a good rule to follow, however too much showing is just as bad as telling. Again, reading out your work is a great way to tell if you're focusing too much on one thing. Another thing to keep in mind is importance, such as do we really need to know that the grass outside was bluegrass? Which in certain situations it would be! For example:

The grass around the disheveled house was brown and straw-like, with the exception of a ring of grass. Bluegrass. Which wasn't even native to this location.

This paints a pretty good spooky picture in the readers' mind and even adds the element suspense by the implied uncertainty.

I've only covered a small portion of writing so if y'all have any questions or need any help feel free to slide into my DMs or send in an ask! I love getting questions about writing and I'm always willing to help a fellow writer!