#apparently that can happen if your pawn is at really high affection but it's rare???

[just-a-carrot]

another dd2 update because clearly i have nothing else in my life right now besides work, getting increasingly nervous about the launch, and this game (it has greatly helped with my anxiety both about the launch and my tumultuous job stability situation lol)

THE SHY HAIR TUCK???? HELLO???? his little mannerisms are so adorable to me...

he only even does this sometimes and i can never guess when he will. we'll be out exploring or just defeated some big monster and i'll turn around and he's just staring at iggy again...

(also included him being sassy to one of my other pawns at the end because it made me laugh, he's always sitting down to rest and/or mouthing off to the others; i love the constant pawn chatter in this game, i know some ppl get annoyed by it but i love how alive it makes the group feel and i feel like i'm part of something running around rather than all alone lol)

have a few more screenshots i took that i liked, also featuring bear and gael, the two hired pawns i've had for a while, whosever they are, they've been very helpful and helped me get to the volcano island for the first time!! plz also note iggy's hilarious pants LOL

[chimchimsauce]

Fairest

Is beauty a blessing or a curse? All of her life, princess YN was told that her beauty was the greatest gift her late mother ever gave her. But when her looks attract a man cruel and bloodthirsty, YN begins to think that her greatest asset is the beginning of her demise.

“Checkmate.”

YN cannot help the grin that spreads across her face as she utters the word, watching as her older brother groans with disdain.

“You always win!” he complains, acting very much like a child.

“That’s because you always get too caught up in the current move, dear brother. The future decisions are the most important ones.”

YN’s older brother, first in line to the throne of their small country Ameris, huffs and crosses his arms over his chest.

“Chess is like war. You get too focused on winning battles that cause you to lose the war. I certainly hope that won’t be the case for our kingdom . . .”

YN is only jesting. Her elder brother is an excellent leader and will make a wonderful king. He’s just really impatient with games. 

“I’m sure I can beat you next round!” her brother says playfully.

They both know it’s unlikely, but YN clears the board and begins to set up another game. As she’s placing the last pawn, a knock comes at the door. One of her handmaidens opens it, revealing one of their father’s special guards. 

YN’s breath catches ever so slightly before she schools her expression back into one of unbothered royalty. It’s always so hard to ignore her secret lover when other people are around, but she knows she must. A relationship between her and her father’s most trusted guard would cause a scandal that would undoubtedly get Wonho’s position revoked. He’s worked his entire life to get good enough for a spot on the King’s royal guard and there’s no way YN would do anything to sabotage that.

“His majesty has requested your presence,” Wonho says, not even looking YN in the eyes.

He’s much better at keeping his emotions in check.

YN’s brother stands, tapping his finger on the chessboard.

“Lucky thing I’m being summoned, or else I would have absolutely destroyed you in this game.”

YN laughs, maybe a little more politely than she would if Wonho wasn’t standing at the door.

“I’m sure of it,” she says, “Feel free to come back anytime to play again.”

YN’s brother nods and leaves her quarters, following after Wonho. Being the heir to the throne means that YN rarely gets to see her brother. He’ll be gone for weeks, sometimes months at a time as he tours the neighboring countries to learn everything he possibly can, as well as maintain a positive relationship with their allies. Ameris may be a small country, but it is located in the perfect spot for transcontinental trade and filled to the brim with valuable resources. One could dig in a mine for just a few moments and emerge with a diamond the size of a robin’s egg.

Thankfully, Ameris has not had any problems with its neighboring countries in hundreds of years. The last war was ended by YN’s great great great grandfather and peace has blanketed the region since then.

Well, for the most part. In the last several years, the Eastern kingdom of Moonbyss has been steadily expanding and taking over small, unclaimed villages. They have not breached any borders or broken any treaties, however, so there is no cause to worry quite yet.

YN sighs as her thoughts shift back to Wonho. Their secret love affair has been going on since they were teenagers. At first, Wonho was just an attractive boy who was willing to indulge her wanton fantasies, but soon enough an affection bloomed between them. It’s so hard to pretend not to be in love with him, especially when he grows more handsome by the day.

“Thinking about him, my lady?” YN’s lady in waiting, Irene, asks her.

Irene is YN’s closest confidant and friend. She knows almost everything about the princess. Ever since she arrived in the castle from abroad two years ago, they have been inseparable. 

“Of course,” YN says, standing and walking over to the window that overlooks her private gardens. 

She opens the glass door and steps outside, her skin warmed by the sunshine. It’s an absolutely beautiful day, cloudless and blue. Birds chirp sweetly and the scent of flowers wafts on the breeze. The princess stops at the fountain in the middle of the garden, sitting on the bench and looking into the bubbling water. YN often made wishes in this fountain when she was younger, tossing in coins that reflected the sunlight back at her. More recently, though, she’s only wished for one thing - to be with Wonho. Her father, although he loves her, would never allow a union between them. Her older brother, however, has promised to allow YN to marry whoever she desires once he takes the throne on his thirtieth birthday.

He does not know that someone already has her affections, but no matter. YN is not worried about being married off. While her brother is the only prince in the kingdom, the king was blessed with twelve daughters and YN is the youngest. Every available man of power in the kingdom and the surrounding countries have already been wedded. 

YN has Irene bring her a book to read and she settles in, getting comfortable in her garden. The hours pass by quickly as she is sucked into the tale, but soon enough a shadow blocks her reading light. 

The princess looks up and is shocked to see Wonho standing in front of her. Alarm flares up inside of her. The two of them have agreed to never be seen together in daylight.

“Won-”

“Your Majesty,” Wonho says stiffly, “The King requests an audience. I have been asked to escort you to the throne room.”

YN hesitates a moment. She can tell that something is wrong by the strain in his voice. Something must really be bothering him for the guard to allow it to leak into his words. She wants to ask him what’s wrong, but she never knows who is watching so she simply stands, handing her book off to Irene who stands beside her.

“Very well,” YN says, trailing after him and back into the castle.

He walks three paces in front of her, leaving her to stare at his back. So much about him has changed in the last few years. He’s gained an immense amount of muscle, something that YN has really grown to appreciate during their midnight endeavors. It’s a shame that everything is covered up by his uniform, but she must admit he looks dashing in it.

As they walk, YN notices that Wonho isn’t the only one acting strangely. The various maids and butlers who usually flit around and chatter pleasantly amongst themselves are dead silent, walking with perfectly straight backs and zipped mouths. The princess notices a few pitying looks tossed her way and something cold settles in her stomach.

What’s going on?

Wonho knocks on the throne room’s closed doors. They are ever so carefully opened a few moments later and Wonho leads YN into the grand room.

Her father sits on the throne, a smaller one empty next to him. It always makes YN sad to see her father by himself. The Queen passed away only a year ago and was her father’s closest friend. The late Queen was kind to everyone, even YN’s mother - a poor girl her father discovered in one of his hunting trips. Apparently, YN’s father was so taken with her mother that he simply had to add her to his harem and rarely visited any of his other concubines afterward. But it didn’t last long - YN’s mother died shortly after her birth. Everyone says that she left YN her ethereal beauty, a fact that led YN to being hidden away in the castle for the majority of her life.

“You’re the most valuable diamond in all of Ameris,” her father told her once, “It’s important that few people know of your existence.”

It had saddened YN when she was younger that she could not attend the lavish parties and balls like her elder sisters and brother, but she came not to mind once Wonho came into her life. It mattered not if other people thought she was beautiful - as long as Wonho desired her, that was more than enough.

Standing to her father’s side is YN’s brother. The jolly air that had surrounded him mere hours ago is gone completely now. He looks furious, an expression YN has rarely seen on his face. He’s looking at a man who stands before the throne, a crown placed perfectly on his head.

Visiting nobility? 

The man turns as the click of YN’s heels sounds out against the marble flooring. YN’s step falters as a large, nearly terrifying grin spreads across his face. He is incredibly handsome, but the smile on his face does nothing but creepy the princess out.

“There she is,” he says, quickly extending his hand towards her.

YN, uncertain, looks at her father who gives her a stiff nod. Hesitantly, YN places her hand in the stranger’s grasp, making sure to school her expression as he places a cold kiss that lingers too long against her gloved hand. The princess has never been more glad to be wearing gloves.

“And who do I have the pleasure of meeting?” YN asks, careful to watch her throne. 

“King Seokjin Moonbyss, your highness. I must say, the rumors of your beauty do you no justice. You’re much more radiant in person.”

YN’s blood freezes in her veins. This cannot mean anything good.

“Thank you,” YN says, a slight tremble in her voice.

The man has still not released her hand.

“YN,” her father says, giving her an excuse to look away from this man - no, this monster - beside her, “King Seokjin has asked for your hand.”

YN barely squashes the shout of protest that so desperately wants to escape her throat. There’s no way this can be happening! No way! Her eldest brother is just three years shy of taking the throne, three years more of having to tiptoe around with Wonho. No way she can get married, especially to someone from so far away.

“Excuse me,” Wonho says, speaking up from his place behind YN, “I thought King Seokjin was already married.”

Relief flows through YN. If Seokjin is already married, then surely this is an error.

“She failed to provide me with a male heir, so I had her disposed of,” King Seokjin says simply, glaring at Wonho, “Do not question me again.”

There is not a trace of remorse in his voice at all, nothing but anger.

YN begins to tremble.

“Father -” she begins.

“King Seokjin has made us an offer I cannot refuse,” he says, cutting her off, “And besides, YN, you’ll be able to be Queen. You never would have had that opportunity here.”

YN’s father would normally never make this sort of decision, especially not for the daughter he tried so hard to keep hidden.

“Of course, sweet YN,” King Seokjin says, “You are free to reject my offer if you so desire. I would, however, be forced to declare war on Ameris. After all, this country is the most resource rich of all the lands. It’s a shame. It would have been so much nicer to make a positive connection with this beautiful country. I wonder how much of its splendor will be left once my troops march through it.”

The threat is crystal clear. YN has to marry this King or her country will suffer for it. YN glances at her father and brother, seeing the fear that’s in their eyes. Ameris is much too small to fight Moonbyss and win, especially since the eastern country has been gaining a lot of territory very rapidly. YN swallows. In a matter of hours, her perfect daydream has been shattered.

“I would be honored to marry you, King Seokjin,” YN says, trying her hardest not to cry.

She can release her tears once she’s in the safety of her own chambers. She cannot show any weakness in front of this man.

“Beautiful and smart,” King Seokjin says, “It will be my honor to have you as my bride. After all, the most handsome man in all the world deserves the most beautiful bride of them all.”

YN never really thought much of her beauty. She’s always heard it was a blessing, the only one her mother ever left her, but right now it feels like a curse. 

“I pray that you’ll join me for dinner this evening, my betrothed,” King Seokjin says.

“I would love to,” YN says even though the thought of having to spend even a single moment more in this man’s presence makes her want to hurl.

“You best retire to your quarters, my love. Your father and I have much to discuss before this evening. I’ll send someone for you when I’m ready.”

The dismissal is clear. YN turns swiftly and leaves the room, Wonho following closely behind her. She walks much too fast to be considered ladylike, but she does not give a damn, wanting to be as far away from the throne room as possible. 

“YN, wait!” Wonho calls out to her.

He grasps her wrist, uncaring of who will see, and pulls her to his chest. As soon as the warmth of him touches her, YN loses all composure, breaking down and sobbing into his pristine uniform.

“Wonho,” she cries out, grasping him as close as she can, her fingers creasing the silk he wears, “I don’t want to be Queen! I want to marry you!”

YN feels something wet fall against her head. Based on the way his shoulders shake, Wonho is also crying. She hasn’t seen him shed a tear since one of his best friends was murdered on a mission.

“What are we going to do?” YN asks into his chest, her voice muffled, “I don’t think I can bear being apart from you, especially with someone as cruel as the King!”

“We’ll figure something out, YN, I promise,” Wonho says, pulling away just enough to give YN a salty kiss.

“At least once more,” YN says once their lips part, “I must have you at least once more.”

“Your wish is my command, princess,” Wonho says, pulling her along to her chambers.

The two fall into the sheets, both knowing that this is the last time despite desperately wanting to spend eternity together.

On the other side of the castle, Irene makes her way through the hallways, stopping at a grand door and knocking three times. No one answers, so she swings it open, prepared to wait for as long as it takes. 

Maybe half an hour later, King Seokjin opens the door, looking quite pleased with himself. He doesn’t greet Irene, instead instantly walking over to her and pinning her against the wall, his lips meeting hers passionately. Irene barely has any time to catch her breath, but she doesn’t mind at all, too enamored with this man she knows is only using her.

When he was only a prince, Seokjin was infamous for being a womanizer. All too often, he lured servants and noble girls alike into his chambers, whispering promises and pressing kisses against their skin only to leave them abandoned like trash when he grew bored of them. Irene was one of those servant girls, but Seokjin has kept her around for longer than most. A part of Irene is convinced it’s because she’s special to him, but she knows it’s really not true.

Seokjin has been obsessed with YN, the secret twelfth princess of Ameris for five years now. Ever since he spotted her while visiting Ameris with his late father, he wanted her - needed her. After all, she’s the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen, trying as he might to find another. His late wife was incredibly beautiful as well, but she didn’t compare to YN. No one else was worthy of her but him. It was YN that drove him to murder his own father and take the throne before he was supposed to. After all, Seokjin has never been a patient man.

Seokjin pulls away from Irene, looking unbothered as ever.

“No good,” he says, “Simply imagining that you’re YN does nothing. I’m tired of waiting.”

His words sting Irene’s heart. She tries not to be bitter, but jealousy is a powerful emotion, one that overshadows the genuine affection she feels for princess YN.

“Well,” the King asks her, “Who is it? The one YN claims to be in love with.”

The King rolls his eyes, gripping his fists tightly. How dare YN love another when he’s already claimed her.

“It’s Wonho,” Irene says, pushing down her feelings, “the guard that accompanied her today.”

“A guard huh? How dare he think he deserves someone as beautiful as YN!” he says, furious.

Seokjin is terrifying when he’s angry. Irene tenses, preparing for the worst. Instead of gripping her hair and tossing her to the floor like he usually does, Seokjin grabs a decorative vase and tosses it against the ground, watching as it shatters into a million pieces.

“You didn’t strike me,” Irene says, shocked.

“I have been practicing,” the King says, “After all, it would be a shame to make a single mark on YN’s perfect body.”

Much too soon, Irene is knocking on YN’s private chamber door.

“Your majesty,” she calls out softly, “Your betrothed has requested your presence.”

YN rolls over to Wonho, tears in her eyes. He blinks them away, wanting to remember this moment clearly.

“One moment,” YN calls out, listening as Irene walks away.

“Run away with me,” YN pleads, her voice desperate.

“You know we can’t,” Wonho says, his eyes sad.

“Yes we can!” YN insists, “You know this country better than anyone. We can get up right now and flee and -”

“YN,” Wonho says, “What about the country? You know we’ll be forced to go to war if you disappear.”

YN sniffles.

“I don’t think I can live without you,” YN confessed, “And if I can, I don’t want to find out.”

Wonho is silent for a moment before he sits up, an idea in his mind.

“What? What is it?” YN asks him.

“What if you didn’t?”

“What?”

“What if you didn’t have to live without me? I’ve heard rumors amongst the staff of a poison you can take that will put you in a deep slumber for a fortnight. If some was mixed into your dinner tonight, it can seem that you’ve been poisoned and passed away. Then when you awake, you and I can disappear together.”

YN brightens. Even though being unconscious for a fortnight doesn’t sound pleasant, anything will be better than having to marry KIng Seokjin. Besides, she trusts Wonho with her life.

“Okay,” YN says, agreeing right away.

“Are you sure, YN?” Wonho asks her, “You will end up getting rather sick for a few days before the slumber.”

YN nods eagerly.

“Yes, anything,” she says.

“Very well.”

Wonho hops out of bed, pulling on his clothes as quickly as he possibly can.

“I’ll get everything ready. YN, go to dinner with the king, alright? I won’t be able to see you after this so as not to arouse suspicion. I love you, princess.”

He leans down to kiss her.

“I love you more,” YN says, watching as Wonho slips out of a glass door and into the gardens.

Unbeknownst to the lovers, King Seokjin is outside the door, his ear pressed against it to hear everything. He had come to escort his beloved like a sweet fiance would, only to hear his to be wife scheming to get away from him.

He’s never been so angry, but he suppressed it, not wanting to let YN know that he’s been here. He grabs Irene by the arm roughly and leads her out into the hallway, bending over to whisper in her ear.

“Make sure to add enough of the poison to YN’s food to keep her under for longer than a fortnight. Put as much of it in as you can without bringing her to the brink of death.”

“Are you sure your -”

Irene’s question is cut off when he backhands her, one of his elegant rings drawing blood.

“Do NOT question me!” he says, “Do as I order!”

Irene rushes off to do as the King says, tears brimming in her eyes. She’s never regretted being Seokjin’s spy until now, too blinded by love. She should have warned YN, should have helped her disappear with Wonho - someone Irene knows truly loves the princess. King Seokjin is just obsessed with her beauty and determined to own her like she’s some sort of object to be bought and sold.

Peeking around the corner, Irene sees Wonho pouring a liquid into the soup bowl meant for the princess. When he leaves and when the coast is clear, Irene snatches the vial from the counter and empties the rest of it into other dishes reserved for the princess before refilling the vial with water and placing it back where Wonho left it.

“YN, I’m so sorry,” she whispers to herself before fleeing into the night, never to be heard from again.

At dinner, YN pretends not to notice the odd taste in her food. It’s obviously been tampered with, but YN doesn’t let it show at all, eating properly and conversing with King Seokjin as much as she can bear. YN misses the look of glee in his eye as he drinks from his goblet, still believing that everything is going to plan.

YN starts feeling ill once the final course comes around. She quickly asks to be excused and King Seokjin offers to walk her back to her room. YN accepts, knowing that she wouldn’t be able to make it on her own with the  way the room begins to spin.

For the next three days and nights, YN is in and out of consciousness, the world swirling around her in a nauseating mix of bright colors and fuzzy shapes. When she closes her eyes at midnight of the third day, her thoughts are on Wonho and the fact that the next time she opens them, she’ll be free to be with him.

But YN does not wake up. Not for a fortnight, not ever. Seokjin, furious, intends to find Irene and hang her for murdering his beloved before realizing that she’s nowhere to be found. It’s easy enough to frame Wonho for her murder and a matter of hours after YN dies, Wonho follows her from the gallows.

At his request, YN is preserved and dressed in a wonderful white wedding gown, still looking very much alive. He marries her anyway and has her crowned, determined to have her even in death. She’s too beautiful to be buried underground, so he commissions a glass coffin to display her in, putting her corpse in his bedroom where no one else can see her. King Seokjin finds that he does not mind YN being dead. She’s much less bothersome in passing, much easier to fall to his will.

King Seokjin stands before her, placing his hand flat against the cool glass of her coffin. Even in death, YN is the fairest of them all.

[artificialqueens]

Undone, Chapter 26 (Bitney) - Stephanie/Veronica

A/N: Hey guys. To anyone who’s still reading this story, thank you for your patience between chapters, I know it’s been slow. Here’s a link to the previous chapters.

Thank you so much to @aqalbatross for beta-ing this chapter, and to @missdandee for helping to murder all the worst babies.

Summary: Slow burn? *Pours lighter fluid, strikes match*

TW: Past emotional abuse

***

“Check it out…” Courtney sings, setting a plant on the table near Bianca’s sewing machine. It’s full and lush and covered in little bright red peppers. She’d spent an hour at the nursery this morning carefully learning about every kind of pepper they had, and ended up with something she knew would make Bianca happy.

“Cool. I don’t think I’m allowed to eat chili peppers though,” Bianca sighs. “The doctor says it’ll make my heartburn worse.”

“No, I know. And I know you’ve been missing them. These are paprika peppers. Apparently they still have a tiny zing, but shouldn’t affect you the way the hotter ones did. Plus it’s cute, like you.”

Dimples deepen in Bianca’s cheek as she lets out an uncharacteristically girlish giggle, reaching for Courtney’s hand.

“Are you sure they aren’t spicy?” she asks.

“Pretty sure. I mean, obviously we’ll be careful. But yeah. You and Ruby Rose Del Rio should both be fine with this one,” says Courtney.

“...huh.” Bianca tilts her head thoughtfully.

“What?”

“Well...it might be because I’ve been staring at this dress all day...but I don’t hate the name ‘Ruby.’”

“Seriously? I love it. Let’s put it on the list!” Courtney exclaims.

“We have a list?”

“Yeah, you didn’t cringe when I said ‘Liam’ either.” Courtney places a kiss against Bianca’s forehead, tucking her hair behind her ear.

“Liam’s okay. Ruby is cool,” Bianca says. She pulls the dress out of the sewing machine and holds it up. “Anyway...what do you think?”

Courtney glances down at the garment in her hands, a glittering red gown, and gasps softly. She reaches out to touch it.

“It’s so beautiful…”

“It’s for you.”

“Really?!” Courtney’s eyes light up.

“Mmhmm. It’s for episode 9.”

Of course, Courtney knows that this is Bianca’s job. To design glamorous dresses for the show, and especially for her character (well, Farrah’s character). But she can't help but think that maybe, just maybe, a little more thought had gone into this gown. She smiles at the thought, the unspoken premise that Bianca might be playing favorites.

“Can I try it on?” Courtney asks, batting her lashes sweetly.

“Yeah!” Thrilled with her enthusiasm, Bianca jumps up to help her change into the dress. As usual, almost out of habit, she averts her eyes when Courtney pulls off her top, trying to avoid direct eye contact with her perfect, perky tits. She swallows, pulling the straps up over Courtney’s shoulders.

“We haven’t done this in awhile…” Bianca comments, pinning the straps. Dimples pierce her cheeks as Courtney gazes at her.

“I know. You’ve been pawning me off on Jamie.” Courtney fingers a lock of Bianca’s dark hair. It’s only been a few days when she’s suspected that Bianca was intentionally avoiding her at work - not as much as during the dark days this summer, but definitely enough to notice. She wonders why, and misses those moments that they used to have together, just the two of them, Bianca’s fingers grazing her skin, eyes wandering over her body. As silly as it sometimes seems, that wardrobe trailer was a huge part of their evolving relationship. Courtney looks into Bianca’s eyes, waiting for an explanation.

“Well, I’m trying to stay focused. Especially lately, with all the lingerie we’ve got you in. It’s...distracting.”

Courtney licks her lips, moving closer, enough to feel Bianca’s heartbeat, a delightful shiver running through her body. “Yeah?”

It wasn’t ever Courtney’s intention to wait this long. She’s been craving Bianca’s touch since the day they met, and if anyone told her a couple of months ago that she’d be the one afraid to take their relationship to the next level, she’d have laughed in their face.

But it was difficult to separate sex from the sting of rejection. It was why, as much as she defended their relationship to her friends, she still had that uneasiness in her chest whenever things got too heated. It was why she kept up a wall, tried to protect herself.

Now though, she’s feeling a shift. Seeing Bianca’s eyes go dark, feeling her pounding heart beat--it no longer makes her feel nervous. It no longer reminds her of pain. Instead, the butterflies in her chest are from excitement, the anticipation of what’s to come. What would happen if she lunged forward, pushed Bianca onto the table? It’s what she wanted all along--Bianca’s hair clutched in her fists, hips arching up to meet her. Courtney can’t help imagining how beautiful she’ll look when she’s glistening with sweat, trembling, mouth open in a silent cry.

Courtney was fine with the waiting, in theory. But now, it’s been almost a month and she’s wondering when the waiting will end. What she can do to make it end. She inches forward some more, fingertips resting lightly on Bianca’s shoulders.

The hair is standing up on the back of Bianca’s neck, and desire pools in her abdomen, so much it’s causing her physical pain. She clears her throat and takes a step backwards.

“You look good.”

“B…” Courtney’s voice is soft, pleading. She leans in, lips parted.

“I think I need a minute…” Bianca dashes from the room, and Courtney turns to watch her, brow furrowed, wondering what went wrong.  

*

Bianca splashes her face with cold water. She does not want to be someone who makes their partner feel pressured to have sex. She was married to that person--the idea of making Courtney feel even a fraction of the anxiety she felt with Jared is unbearable.

But sometimes when they touch, Bianca can feel her resolve melting, feel her body betray her higher consciousness. And today, Courtney’s silky voice and warm skin are just too much. Maybe it’s the hormones rampaging through her body, but she feels closer than ever to losing control, lust threatening to overtake her completely. She doesn’t want to break her promise to wait, so her only choice in that moment was to remove herself from the situation.

She pats her face dry with a towel, breathing deeply, when a knock sounds on the door.

“It’s open.”  

Courtney pushes the door in slightly.

“Are you okay?”  

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

Courtney nods, head against the door frame, eyes soft and achingly inviting. Bianca clears her throat, looking away.

“Don’t worry about the dress. I hung it up, safe and sound.”

“I wasn’t worried,” Bianca tells her.

“Liar,” Courtney says.

Bianca can’t help but chuckle at that. It’s a true testament to how emotionally volatile she feels that she hadn’t thought about the dress. Under normal circumstances, Courtney’s right--it would have been her first concern.

“Anyway, um…” Courtney hesitates, nails picking at a chip in the paint. “I was wondering if you maybe want to take the dogs for a walk? It’s a really nice day. We could take them to the beach...then swing by that new bougie ice cream place on Abbot Kinney on the way back…?”

“Wow, you know me.”

“Yeah.” Courtney smiles, and Bianca nods.

“Okay. Yeah, let’s do it.”

***

Bianca wishes that she were a better person. She wishes that she was brave enough to tell Courtney how she’s really feeling - the physical longing that seems to be clouding her judgment, the need just to be close to her, to feel the warmth of her skin, taste her. Or maybe, what she really wishes is that she had enough self control that it would be a non issue. That her patience with the pace of their relationship was deeper and that she didn’t feel tortured merely by knuckles brushing against hers in line at the ice cream shop. That she could enjoy a moment of light flirting without an irrepressible desire to grasp her by the wrist and throw her up against the counter. That she didn’t misconstrue every touch as an invitation, a dare.

Sitting at a little table outside, she avoids watching Courtney, unable to handle the way she twirls the cone on her tongue without filthy, sordid thoughts racing through her mind. She looks straight ahead, muscles tensing up when Courtney’s knee presses into her bare thigh.

“Is it good?” Courtney asks, gesturing to the salted peanut dark chocolate in Bianca’s hands. Trying and failing to catch her eye again. She wonders if she’s being too subtle - not a usual problem for her, but something isn’t connecting.  

“Yeah…” It is good. And thank god. Because if she’s going to replace sex with food, it better be fucking delicious. Bianca tastes it again, adding, “...perfection.”

“Wow, high praise. I might have to call this a cheat day so I can taste it.” Courtney purses her lips in a sinful smirk, brow arched in a silent challenge.

“Go ahead. Cheat away,” Bianca murmurs as she holds out the cone.

Instead of taking it from her, Courtney guides Bianca’s hand closer to her mouth, licking slowly around the rim of the cone, eyes catching Bianca’s as she chases a drip down the side, taking Bianca’s thumb into her mouth. She traps it with her teeth, swirling her tongue around the tip as Bianca watches, slack-jawed and glassy eyed. Mesmerized by the whole performance, the heat of her mouth. Bianca feels her heart in her throat as Courtney finally releases her thumb, letting it slide slowly from her mouth, leaving a wet print on her bottom lip.

“Drips,” Courtney explains hoarsely, and it takes all of Bianca’s strength not to leap across the table right then and there.

Especially when Courtney goes back to her own cone, eyes still locked on Bianca’s, and it suddenly occurs to Bianca that her vulgar thoughts haven’t been an accident.

“Right,” Bianca breathes.

“Do you...wanna get out of here?” Courtney then asks, eyes raking over Bianca’s body in a way that makes her skin prickle.

It’s incredibly rare these days for Bianca not to finish her food, especially something as delicious as the melting ice cream in her hands. But she realizes that there’s only one thing she wants to taste right now, and it’s not something purchased from an artisan shop in Venice.

Bianca only nods, taking Courtney’s offered hand. She pulls her onto unsteady feet and wraps an arm around her. Every step along the way home, Bianca feels her heart beat faster. By the time they get through the door, she’s lightheaded, leaning on the wall for support while Courtney unhooks the dogs from their leashes.

Courtney straightens up, stepping closer to her. Her face is bathed in golden light from the setting sun. Green eyes looking almost amber as she slides her hands around Bianca’s waist. Bianca swallows hard, chest rising and falling rapidly, intoxicated by the space closing between them.

“You are...beautiful…” Courtney whispers.

A whimper has barely escaped Bianca’s lips before Courtney swallows it up with a kiss, pressing her against the wall, hands roaming over her body. Bianca deepens the kiss, tongue slipping into her mouth. When Courtney’s fingers brush up against her nipples, she lets out a low moan, wrapping a leg around her to pull her closer.

“You really that sensitive, baby?” Courtney smiles against her and pushes a thigh up between her legs.

“Uh huh…” Bianca’s hips are arching forward, rutting against her frantically. If she were capable of feeling any sort of shame right now, she might be embarrassed at what a mess she is, but her body is on auto, responding only to touch. Every coherent thought slips through her fingers like sand before it even has the chance to form.

Courtney lifts the cotton shift dress over her head and steps back, tossing the dress to the ground and taking her in.

She’d insisted about a hundred times over the past few weeks that Bianca’s body was exactly the same, but the truth is, Courtney can see the differences. Her breasts are fuller, belly just barely swollen, thighs thicker...and it’s all working. It’s like everything she was attracted to from the beginning has been exaggerated to a point that’s almost obscene--just curves for days, and Bianca’s heavy-lidded eyes giving her that signature smirk.

She feels a bit weird that she’s so into it, but when Bianca tangles into her hair and pulls her in for another heated kiss, the concern begins to dissolve. Her mouth trails down to Bianca’s jaw, tasting her hungrily. That’s when she realizes the true difference, the real change--unrestrained hunger now replaces the months and months of repression.

Bianca’s nipples are painfully hard against her lace bra, and when Courtney begins to toy with them again, she feels a rush of heat to her abdomen, throwing her head back with such force that she bangs it against the wall.

“Shit!”

“Are you okay?” Courtney cradles Bianca’s face in both of her hands.

“Yeah. I’m fine,” Bianca reassures her, laughing. She knows that she won’t be able to stay upright much longer, and musters up the strength to push Courtney down the hall to the bedroom, tearing her clothes off as they go. Even though she stumbles twice, she doesn’t let it slow her down.

Her head is spinning as they crash through the door onto the bed in a tangled heap. Bianca’s whole body is tense like a coiled spring, desire an urgent need as Courtney’s hands grip her waist, pull her closer.

She arches up, trembling, head tilting back as Courtney’s mouth finds her neck, murmuring softly against her skin. It takes Bianca a moment to realize that she’s asking a question.

“What?” Bianca’s mind is absolute mush. Her skin is burning, and Courtney’s hands are the only thing keeping her from bursting into flames.

“I just wanted to check, before we get too deep...um...is there anything I need to know?” Courtney finds her eyes, fingers pausing, hooked into the side of her panties.

“I...what?” Bianca repeats, panting.

“I mean...is there anything off limits? I don’t want to hurt you, or the baby.”

“No. No, everything is fine. Take them off,” Bianca orders impatiently, raising her hips to help speed things along.

Courtney complies, sliding her panties down her legs, which immediately fall open. Courtney kisses her, just below her belly button, and Bianca’s hips jolt upwards.

“You’re sure?” Courtney is just as anxious as Bianca for this to happen, but she knows that she’ll never be able to forgive herself if she does something to endanger the baby.

“Omigod, yes! As long as you’re not going in there with a wire hanger, we’re fine! Just…”

Courtney’s eyes widen, followed by a giggle, cheek pressed to Bianca’s belly. Realizing how utterly desperate she sounded, Bianca laughs too.

“Shit. Sorry.”

“Nothing to help the mood like a back-alley abortion reference,” Courtney chuckles.

“I really am sorry,” Bianca says, shaking her head with a self-deprecating groan. “I didn’t mean to rush you. I’ll be romantic, I swear.”

“Nahh,” Courtney flashes her a sunny smile. “Just be yourself.”

“Fuck you!” Bianca barks, taking the opportunity to unhook her bra and fling it aside, laying back and gazing at Courtney with a smug expression. “So, we doin’ this or what?”

“Your impatience is sexy,” Courtney says. She crawls forward, trailing her fingers up Bianca’s thigh, watching her face until she visibly shivers. She lowers her mouth to her hard nipple, licking her first with the tip of her tongue, then sucking hard, summoning a moan deep from Bianca’s throat.

Silky blonde hair is clutched in Bianca’s hands, knuckles turning white as Courtney continues to suck, circling the other nipple with her fingers. Bianca’s hips buck faster and faster in a desperate attempt for friction until she can’t take it anymore, a strangled sound coming from the back of her throat as the fingers circling her nipples start to pinch them, sending sparks through her body.

And then Courtney’s mouth is traveling lower, and Bianca bites her lip in anticipation, so hard she can taste blood. She waits breathlessly for Courtney to put her out of her misery, head thrown back, hands tangled into her hair. Finally, Courtney’s tongue rolls against her clit, and she lets out a moan of relief.

Courtney glances up, tongue circling her clit slowly, watching her fall apart. It’s shockingly fast, and seeing her so utterly needy is beautiful. She runs the back of her hand against her, and Bianca thrusts forward to grind against her knuckles.

Bianca flings a leg over Courtney’s shoulder, heel digging into her spine. Her hips jerk, body in overdrive, as Courtney continues to suck on her clit.

“Fuck, fuck!” Cursing soon turns to incoherent moans as she comes, writhing beneath Courtney’s hands, grinding against her tongue.

At first, Bianca is self-conscious about losing it so quickly, but the feeling soon evaporates, warmth spreading through her limbs as she sinks into the mattress.

Courtney trails soft kisses up her torso to her throat. And this is Bianca’s favorite part, the feel of her lips dancing over her skin. The warmth of her hands, wrapped around Bianca’s waist, sliding to her back. Bianca realizes how much she’s been craving this connection. This touch. A moan catches in her chest, coming out as almost a sob.

“Is something wrong?” Courtney asks, head lifting sharply, arms tightening around her.

Bianca says nothing, but pulls back to look at her. Her breath is shallow and she brushes Courtney’s hair back, hands resting on her cheeks. Her eyes are all over Courtney, as if she’s asking a question, silent and searching.

“Nothing’s wrong, I just...” she whispers, a thumb grazing Courtney’s bottom lip. She can’t put it into words, so she doesn’t. She places a kiss to the corner of her mouth, so light and so featherlike that it’s hardly even there.

Courtney’s heart smashes against her ribs when Bianca looks at her.

There’s something about the quiet that makes her feel unsure of herself, but Courtney can’t pull any quips or pleasantries from her brain. She’s so captured in this moment, so very present that she can’t think of anything other than the way Bianca looks under her, eyes glassy and lips parted. The way that she holds her from the bottom. Courtney realizes that it isn’t just a bed they’re sharing, and it scares her. Maybe scares her more than the idea of fucking it up. Because relationships ending, that’s familiar territory. But this...they’ve worked so hard for this. They’ve made the choice to lean into love, to trust each other completely, and now there’s no turning back.

A lump forms in Courtney’s throat as she tries to find words.

“B-“

She’s kissed quiet as Bianca sits up under them, raking her fingers up Courtney’s neck and into her hair. It’s not until they’re both gasping for air that Bianca finally breaks the kiss, stroking Courtney’s hair and gazing up into her eyes. There’s still something unresolved, something plaguing her, and Courtney waits anxiously to find out what that is. Finally, Bianca speaks.

“This is our first time,” she proclaims hoarsely, eyes misty. “Okay?”

Courtney caresses her cheek, nodding. There’s something so pure and innocent about Bianca’s simple solution for a fresh start, and it makes Courtney’s heart melt a little.

“Okay.”

Bianca’s eyes instantly glow brighter, dimples appearing under Courtney’s fingers. She raises her head again, finding Courtney’s lips and gently coaxing them open with her own.

There have been so many false starts. So many near misses. So many that Courtney has convinced herself that her fantasies are just that: a figment of her overactive imagination. But now, as everything falls into place, she finally allows herself to accept that it’s real. It’s real, and it’s happening, and it’s better than Courtney’s dared to dream it would be, even in her most ecstatic fantasies.

Feeling Bianca’s skin against hers, what strikes Courtney the most is how right it all feels. She’s so warm and soft, so responsive to every touch. Courtney parts her thighs, settling between them firmly. Her lips find the tenderest part of Bianca’s neck, sucking gently while she bears down against her.

Bianca thrusts up against her, clutching Courtney’s ass in her hands.

Courtney presses down harder, rocking against her, quickly finding the angle that makes her whimper breathlessly. “You like that?”

“Uh huh…” Bianca closes her eyes, succumbing to the gentle rhythm, the perfect pressure of Courtney rubbing against her clit. She knows that she’s embarrassingly wet, but can’t bring herself to care. “Jesus christ, fuck…”

Courtney’s been craving this contact for so long, and having Bianca fall apart in her arms makes it better than she anticipated. She’s on the brink herself when she sees Bianca start to unravel, feels the nails dig into her skin. It’s not going to take much for her to follow. She raises herself onto her elbows, hips rolling harder and slower now, Bianca’s moans the last thing to push her over the edge.

Waves of pleasure radiate through her body as her muscles strain, then turn to jelly.

“Oh god, fuck…keep going...please...”

It takes all the strength Courtney has not to simply melt into her once she comes, but she knows that Bianca wants more. So she reaches a hand down, wedging her fingers between their bodies to circle her swollen clit gently. A string of pained whimpers falls from Bianca’s lips as a reward, spurring her on. Bianca arches against her hand, clutching desperately at her arm. Courtney takes the hint and pushes the tip of a finger inside her.

“Is this okay?” she whispers, palm brushing against her wet, heated skin.

With a gasp and a nod, Bianca arches upward, uttering a strained, “More…”

Courtney can’t help but be impressed at Bianca’s appetite, thrilled by her endurance. She slides two fingers in, curling them just so, thumb still gently rubbing her clit.

“Oh god, don’t stop…” Bianca moans.

“I got you,” Courtney tells her. With her lips pressed to Bianca’s temple, she continues working her from the inside, speed increasing to match Bianca’s hips, ignoring the growing ache in her forearm.  

“Court…” Bianca says, gripping her shoulder, body still moving at a frenzied pace.

“Yes?”

“I love you,” she says, in between breathless gasps.

“I know, baby.” Courtney can feel her trembling, and presses the heel of her hand against her. It’s enough to ground her for a moment, allowing her to take in a deep breath before letting go.

Bianca’s having an almost out-of-body experience. In this moment, the only thing she knows is Courtney: her sure hands and her tender words, making her feel both secure and precious. Guiding her through wave after wave until she’s so weak and dizzy that she can barely remember her name.

She shudders, her whole body feeling like a raw nerve. It’s almost painful when Courtney eases her slick fingers out, trailing them lightly up her body.

“Shit…” Bianca buries her face into Courtney’s hair, still breathless. “I really needed that.”

“You and me both.”

After a few moments, she blinks open her eyes just in time to see Courtney sucking her fingers into her mouth, punctuated by a naughty wink. She chuckles slightly and brings a hand up to Courtney’s face.

“So...then you’re glad we did it?” Bianca’s chest feels tight as she waits for Courtney’s answer.

“I’m always glad to have sex,” she says with another wink.  

“Courtney-” In spite of Courtney’s playful, happy attitude, insecurity still gnaws at Bianca’s insides. She can’t help remembering the pain in her eyes when they spoke in Bob’s office. How knowing that she’d caused that pain made her hate herself more than she ever had.

“Yes.” Courtney presses a lingering kiss to Bianca’s forehead. “Yes, I’m glad. More than glad...it felt right. Didn’t it?”

“Even though Bob said to wait?”

“We did wait,” Courtney insists. She reaches up to run her finger along Bianca’s cheek.

“That’s true…” Bianca sighs, relieved, finally sure that they made the right decision. Especially when Courtney continues to caress her face, the gentle rhythm of her breathing changing ever so slightly as her heart picks up speed.

Bianca kisses her deeply, capturing her lower lip and tugging gently with her teeth. She hears the faintest whimper, and it empowers her to deepen the kiss, to pull her close. Slow, lazy kisses soon turn passionate, and then they’re rolling around on the bed again, unable to get enough of each other.

“I have a confession to make…” Bianca pants against her mouth.

“Yeah?” Courtney’s eyes open quickly, intrigued in spite of the slightly dizzy state she’s in.

“Mmhmm…” Bianca trails her lips along Courtney’s jaw. “When I was sleeping here alone...I may have sort of...snooped a little?”

One of Courtney’s eyebrows lifts, waiting for Bianca to explain further.

“I found your stash...” Bianca’s eyes shift down towards Courtney’s night table. That drawer full of toys, the one that’s been taunting her.

“Oh yeah?” Courtney bites her lip. “See anything you like?”

“Maybe?”

Courtney slides her hands into Bianca’s hair, tangling her fingers into her thick locks. She tugs gently, pulling her in closer. “Show me.”

A rush of butterflies fills Bianca’s belly. She smiles slightly, eyes boring into Courtney’s, before opening the drawer and pulling out a harness and smooth purple dildo.

“The big guns, huh?” Courtney heart pounds, reaching for the objects in Bianca’s hands. She begins to slip the harness on when Bianca stops her.

“I wanna wear it,” she says, gripping Courtney’s wrist and looking deep into her eyes.

Courtney’s mouth forms a surprised ‘oh,’ stomach dropping a bit.  

“I mean, if that’s something you’d want.” Bianca clears her throat, eyes now lowering. Almost bashful.    

“Um…it’s not really my...favorite thing?” Courtney feels a little bad. Bianca seems so enthusiastic, and she hates to be the one to burst her bubble. But she’s just never been into that kind of deep penetration.

“Shit.” Regret floods Bianca’s chest, burns on her cheeks. Of course it’s not her thing. She feels like an idiot for assuming otherwise. Her only defense is that her mind must be addled from a year of pent-up desires. “I just thought, cause it’s hands-free, that it would be...I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Courtney lifts her chin and places a soft kiss on her mouth. “I mean, I know that a lot of people like it. That’s why I have it. But I’ve just never really liked-”

“Right. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize,” Courtney tells her.

Bianca groans, shaking her head. “I just hate that I killed the vibe.”

“No, you didn’t,” Courtney says, pushing her onto her back.

“Oh no? Then why are we talking and not fucking right now?” Bianca challenges.

Courtney giggles softly, hands sliding around her waist.

“Talking is a pretty important part of fucking,” Courtney murmurs. “How else do you know if you’re doing it right?”

It’s a fair question, one that catches Bianca off guard. She takes a moment to think before answering.

“Um...you’re supposed to have a psychic connection. You just...know,” Bianca says this with a hint of sarcasm, like she’s fooling around, but part of her might believe it. At this point, she’s not totally sure.

“Right.” Courtney nods. “Or, I could just shake you and see if answers appear like a magic 8-ball. That would probably be about as accurate.”

Bianca narrows her eyes. She can tell when she’s being mocked. And while she would like to object, she has to admit that Courtney makes a little sense. Plus, her green eyes sparkle with mischief, grasping Bianca’s shoulders as if she’s really going to try shaking her. So instead, Bianca just smirks up at her.

“Very funny.”

Courtney gives her a lopsided grin, lashes fluttering, and lays her head against the pillow.

“I just...wanna take care of you,” Bianca says. “I want to make you come.”

Courtney bites her lip. Her hands wander over Bianca’s body, dancing over her skin.

“You don’t need a dildo for that. Everything you need is right here.” Her knuckles brush against Bianca’s full, parted lips.

“Oh yeah?”

“Mmhmm…so I’m just gonna put this little lady away for now…”

Courtney pushes the purple dildo back into the drawer, and Bianca takes her lapse in attention as an opportunity to throw her unceremoniously onto her back, earning a delighted shriek.

Courtney relaxes, fully surrendering to the moment as she lets Bianca take the reigns, surprised at how easily it’s happening. Bianca smiles again, victorious.

She’s hungry. She craves the taste of Courtney’s skin on her tongue. Kissing her over and over, deep and messy. Finally free to explore every inch of her, discover what makes her whimper and moan, what makes her arch and clench her fists and buck her hips. What makes her cry out and beg for more.

She’s between Courtney’s legs, fingers resting delicately on her knees. Holding her in place with the lightest pressure. Trailing butterfly kisses up her inner thighs until there’s a desperate tug at her hair.

“Please-” comes the choked whimper.

“Please what?” Bianca’s eyes glitter.

Courtney raises up onto her elbows, chest heaving, cheeks flushed a dark red. Bianca lays a cheek against her thigh, wondering how she’s so impossibly beautiful, why they’ve denied themselves so long.

“You’re sadistic…” Courtney’s playful tone betrays her words, fingers twirling in Bianca’s hair.

“Is that a problem?” Bianca nibbles on her tender skin, feels her tremble, muscles tightening. She knows that this isn’t quite fair, but she loves every reaction, every subtle shift in her body. She meets Courtney’s eyes again, leveling a challenging gaze at her.  

A shiver runs through Courtney’s body as she tilts her head, trying to stop her hips from thrusting forward against her will.

“No. Do your worst.”

Bianca smiles, fully prepared to comply with this dare. She runs the tip of her tongue up Courtney’s thigh, then stops, moving to the other side, watching through a dark fringe of lashes as Courtney’s head falls backwards again.

She pushes against her knees, legs spreading more, watching her muscles tense and flutter. The scent is intoxicating as Bianca leans forward, breathing her in.

“Every part of you is so fucking beautiful,” Bianca says, as fingers tighten in her hair.

Courtney bites back another whimper, waiting in delicious agony, Bianca’s warm breath and the low vibrations of her voice all part of the torture.

After another tug to her hair, Bianca lets Courtney guide her head forward, exactly where she wants it, before pressing an open-mouthed kiss to her.

She arches up, Bianca’s name falling from her lips like a prayer, and all Bianca wants is to make her say it again, say it louder, never stop saying it. She swirls her tongue, relishing the taste of her. Loving the firm and gentle way she directs her with a fist wrapped in her hair.

“Higher, higher. Yeah, right there,” Courtney mumbles. “Now talk to me…”

“Talk to you?” Bianca lifts her eyes.

“Yeah like...talk into me,” Courtney explains breathlessly.

“Dirty talk?” Bianca asks.

“No. Just…” The right words are eluding Courtney at the moment, so she finishes with, “...Anything. Just speak against my pussy. Please.”

“Um…” Bianca leans forward again, racking her brain, lips brushing against Courtney’s clit. She’s drawing a total blank. Finally, something pops into her head. “I pledge allegiance to the cunt...”

Courtney lets out a noise in between an aggrieved sigh and a chuckle.

“Bianca!”

“You said anything,” Bianca points out.

“Maybe just...sing instead.”

“Sing?!”

“Yeah.” Courtney nods emphatically. “The alphabet song. Happy Birthday. Whatever. Just don’t make me laugh.”

“Mmm...okay.” Bianca pauses, then tries again. “Jesus loves me, this I know…”

Courtney starts giggling again, and Bianca raises her head.

“No good?”

“I’ll make it work. Keep going…” Courtney says, relaxing against the pillows, pressing the back of her head down.

Before she buries her face into her again, Bianca takes one moment for her eyes to meet Courtney’s, glittering mischievously.

“What can I say? I’m having a religious experience.”

“Tell it to my clit.”

Bianca bends down, humming slightly, feeling the muscles in her thighs flutter. Suddenly, she has no trouble finding words. A litany of praise tumbles from her mouth. She feels intoxicated by her scent, by the way she’s getting wetter and wetter. She gets bolder, flicking her tongue.  

“Bianca, oh god,” Courtney moans.  

Bianca’s licks get deeper, faster, lapping her up with such enthusiasm that Courtney can no longer hold it together. She arches upwards, crying out, toes curled. Hands tangled so deep into Bianca’s hair that she couldn’t remove them now if she wanted to. She feels her whole body shuddering with pleasure.

Finally, Courtney stops shaking to find Bianca sliding over her, pressing kisses along her jaw. A shiver runs through her, goosebumps prickling her skin under Bianca’s touch. The weight of her body bearing down is comforting, helping her breathing return to normal. When she finally rolls onto her back, Courtney immediately misses the warmth of her skin. She’s still too spent to move much, but she manages to find Bianca’s hand, clutch it to her chest. When she turns her head, she finds Bianca’s clear blue eyes looking back at her.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” Courtney answers, head tilted girlishly at her.  

Bianca edges closer, licking her lips.

The room is quiet and still. The only thing Courtney hears is the dogs out in the hallway, nails skittering on the wood floors. It’s a perfect moment, everything Courtney’s wanted for so long. She brings Bianca’s hand to her lips and brushes a kiss against the inside of her wrist.

“So...that was fun,” Bianca whispers, rubbing a cheek against Courtney’s shoulder.

“I’ll say…” Courtney bites her lip, snuggling closer.

“Was it okay? You kinda threw me for a loop there.”

“Mmhmm. Better than okay. Much better.”

The dimples deepen in Bianca’s cheeks as she meets Courtney’s bright eyes.

“Yeah?

“Your amateur status is officially revoked,” Courtney says, pressing a soft kiss to her mouth.

A satisfied smile spreads across Bianca’s face. It seems like a shallow thing to be concerned with, but she can’t help it. She knows that her experience with women is limited, and knowing that she can please Courtney somehow makes her confidence go up exponentially. She sighs contentedly, limbs feeling relaxed and heavy…

“Shit!” Courtney suddenly says.

Bianca’s eyes fly open. “What?! What’s wrong?”

“I never made you dinner.”

Courtney looks so distressed that Bianca has to laugh.

“Honey. I can feed myself; I’m not a puppy. Shit!” Bianca sits up, realizing that the dogs haven’t been fed either.

“I’ll take care of them,” Courtney says, pulling on a jersey, clearly understanding exactly why Bianca is distressed. “You can relax.”

Bianca rubs her eyes, wondering for the millionth time how she will ever possibly deserve someone this generous, this loving. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, don’t worry. I’m just gonna heat up the leftover Thai. I can handle it.”

“I don’t know if the dogs like Thai,” Bianca jokes, and Courtney giggles, tossing her a kiss before sailing through the door. Bianca settles backwards.  

***

Later, they snuggle in bed, empty take-out containers piled on the nightstand. Bianca’s arms are wrapped around Courtney from behind, face buried in the crook of her neck as Courtney plays gently with her fingers. Bianca breathes in her heavenly scent, sighing.

“Sometimes I wish I could just...make myself super tiny and live…” She kisses Courtney’s neck. “...right here…” After another kiss, she adds, “All the time.”

Courtney glances behind her, grinning.

“Sometimes I forget how weird you are.” She twists around in order to plant a kiss directly on Bianca’s mouth. “Don’t ever lose that.”

“...’Kay…” Bianca chuckles, head heavy on the pillow. She can feel her eyelids begin to droop, and she fights it, stifling a yawn.

“Are you sleepy?” Courtney kisses her nose sweetly.

“No.”

“Liar…” Courtney grins at her, a hand stroking her cheek.

“I don’t want tonight to end,” Bianca whispers.

“Yeah. I know.” Courtney presses a cheek against hers. She does know how Bianca feels. She feels it too, in a way. Afraid to break the spell. Knowing that tomorrow could very easily bring a whole host of problems and complications. Wanting to live in this warm bliss for as long as possible.

Instead of letting that fear take hold, she breathes into it, letting it wash over her and then fall away. After another deep breath, she suggests, “Maybe tomorrow will be even better.”  

Bianca swallows, wrapping her arms tighter around Courtney’s waist.

“Maybe it will.”

[lifeflowingon]

| QUICKSILVER | 2 |

• SUMMARY: After a student is gruesomely murdered on campus, Baek Haeju finds herself trying to extract information from the only person who might know the truth. But is secretive English major Min Yoongi just a witness? Or is he the culprit?

• WARNINGS: Death, murders, sex.

• WORDS: 3376.

"I don't like these tiny portions with your artful abortions of sound, sealed with a kiss, slathered in the sauce sarcastic. So go choke on your irony."

The Futile | Say Anything

To become friends with someone, it requires spending time with said person. You have to share secrets, joys, tragedies. Be there for each other no matter what. Haeju knows this.

But Min Yoongi has vanished without a trace, and Haeju can't be friends with a ghost.

He hasn't shown up for the past two World Lit sessions, and Haeju wonders if he's all right. Jungkook seems agitated, because no one seems to know a thing about the whereabouts of the mysterious boy. Haeju suggested that maybe Yoongi is keeping a low profile because of what happened with Yon.

Either way, Haeju is glad she doesn't have to be Yoongi's friend, at least for now. The empty seat beside her, however, is haunting her. She doesn't pay attention to Miss Dawes, who keeps talking about the "partner project" and the significance of it. Haeju looks away from Yoongi's empty desk and tries to focus on the teacher droning in front of her.

"I'll assign you a topic," says Miss Dawes. "Once you pick your partner, come up to my desk and I'll tell you what it is. Come on, guys, this isn't high school. Pick somebody and get it over with."

The guy sitting behind Haeju pokes her gently, and Haeju turns around. He is running his fingers through his curly hair, and haphazardly rearranges his lopsided glasses. "Do you have a partner?" he asks shyly. "I'm Wesley."

"Haeju," she says, smiling. "And I, um..." She glances around and decides to lie. "Yeah, I do. He's not here today, but he promised we would be partners."

"Oh, you mean... Min Yoongi" asks Wesley through narrowed eyes. "I didn't know you guys were friends."

"Oh, yeah, totally," says Haeju, but Wesley looks skeptical.

"Huh, he's a weird one," says Wesley, clearing his throat. "You don't seem like the kind of girl he would hang out with. How is he? Is he hiding after what happened with my best friend, Yon?"

"I..." Haeju is a loss for words, but Wesley turns around and ignores Haeju, making conversation with another student. Haeju feels stupid just sitting there, so she stands up and walks over to Miss Dawes' desk.

"I'm here to get my topic," mumbles Haeju.

"Who's your partner?" asks Miss Dawes, not looking up.

"Um..." Haeju takes a deep breath, slightly hating Jungkook. "Min Yoongi. He's not here today but"

Miss Dawes looks up and frowns at Haeju, but merely shrugs as he goes back to her notes and writes down something. Haeju stands there awkwardly, waiting for Miss Dawes to say something.

"Your topic is rain," says Miss Dawes in a mysterious tone. "I need you and Mr. Min to write an essay about rain."

"Sorry?" blurts Haeju.

"How rain affects... oh, I don't know, your behavior, life, nature!" says Miss Dawes happily. "Read essays about rain by other writers! The secrets behind every single drop! You two will need to figure out which angle you want to take!"

Haeju raises an eyebrow and stares at Miss Dawes in confusion. What on Earth is this woman talking about? But she just mumbles a "thanks" and goes back to her seat. She has a partner, she has a topic, she has almost everything.

Except Yoongi's friendship.

xxxx

"Aw, cheer up. What's wrong? You've been so subdued lately," says Chaerin worriedly as they take a seat at one of the dining hall tables.

"You've noticed? Hard to tell when you're spending all of your free time with Chaeku," says Haeju bitterly.

"I'm trying to save my relationship with that man," protests Chaerin. "He was so distant during break. 'Oh, Chaerin, I have to do this, do that.' I'm losing him!"

Haeju snorts, all too familiar with Chaerin's love for melodrama. Haeju's only met Chaeku a couple times, and she dislikes him intensely. She has no idea why her best friend is dating a guy like that.

"Maybe you should lose him," mutters Haeju, and Chaerin gives her a surprised look.

"Okay, killjoy, what's going on?" says Chaerin, putting her salad aside. "Is it Jungkook again? Did he get a new girlfriend?"

"No!" says Haeju quickly. She promised Jungkook she would tell no one about their "secret" mission, not even Chaerin. "Um... let's change the subject. Chaeku! Yeah, let's talk about Chaeku."

Chaerin doesn't seem too convinced but she soon starts ranting about Chaeku and his behavior, Chaeku and his brother, Chaeku and his brother's friend, that insufferable Lee Yoongi".

You know Min yoongi?" squeaks Haeju. "You've never mentioned him before!"

"Well, with our work shifts and school schedules, we rarely have time to talk," chuckles Chaerin. "So sad. But yeah, I know him. Why?"

"Just... um, he's my partner in my World Lit class," blushes Haeju. "And I have no idea where he is. I mean, we need to talk about our project and stuff... so... Chaeku's brother is friends with him?"

What a small world.

"Yeah, Hoseok actually shares a dorm room with Yoongi," says Chaerin nonchalantly. "They're both living in Ross Hall, you know, the artsy hall. Do you want me to talk to him or...?"

Haeju shakes her head and pulls out her phone, texting Jungkook frantically. She tells him that Yoongi's location had been in front of her all along, and that Jungkook owes her, big time.

"Do you know what's their room number?" asks Haeju, waiting for Jungkook's response.

"I could ask Chaeku... hold on," says Chaerin, reaching for her phone. Haeju's phone starts buzzing, and she can't help but smile at Jungkook's text.

You're amazing, Haeju darling. We must celebrate tonight after you talk to him. Looking forward to spend time with you. Just let me know.

Haeju is beaming, and Chaerin tells her something, but all she can hear is bliss. She is feeling like a silly love song.

xxxx

She walks down the hallway, holding her breath. People are giving her weird stares, as if they know she doesn't belong here. Haeju tries to breathe, but she feels like something is burning and blacking her lungs, and she looks at the piece of paper with the information Chaerin gave her. She still can't believe she agreed to help Jungkook with this, she doesn't want to be involved in this at all. She feels like a pawn, but Jungkook is her best friend after all, and perhaps her future husband, so...

She finally finds the door and knocks nervously as other students walk past her, looking at her curiously. She can hear them muttering, wondering what the preppy , innocent, bookloving Baek Haeju is doing in their building. Ross Hall is known for holding the most intellectuallynpretentious

students on campus, and it's been nicknamed Hipster Hall, much to Haeju's amusement.

Haeju knocks again, the bile rising in her throat, and she can hear the door unlocking.

Haeju steps back as the door opens and there he is, dark circles under his bright eyes, dressed in black, many rings decorating his fingers. He looks intimidating, and it seems that he hasn't shaved in days. Everything about him screams secrecy and contempt, and he is studying her carefully, making Haeju shiver. Her eyes focus on his lips, the way they're twitching into a smirk, and she knows that this isn't going to be easy.

What did I get myself into? she thinks. I'm just a student, I don't want to be involved in this at all, I don't, I don't"

Um... Min Yoongi?" She mumbles.

"Yeah," he says dryly. "Who are you?"

He doesn't remember being an idiot to her? Haeju's not surprised.

"Baek Haeju, er, I'm in your World Lit class?" offers Haeju clumsily.

Yoongi raises an eyebrow at her and Haeju wonders if he is able to see through her. He probably knows that she's here to spy on him, that every word that escapes his lips will be relayed to Jungkook, that this stupid mystery will somehow be solved with Haeju's amazing, incredible, nonexistent detective like skills. The only experience she has with investigating a murder is reading mystery novels or watching crime TV shows.

No, she's not good at this at all.

"What do you want?" asks Yoongi, irritation in his voice.

Haeju breathes deeply, faking a smile. Let the acting begin.

"Well, um, you haven't been in class?" says Haeju, stumbling on her words.

"So?" drawls Yoongi.

"We're... partners," explains Haeju timidly. "I just wanted to let you know that you're my partner."

"Why?" asks Yoongi, and he sounds impatient. "I wasn't there. Did she pick partners at random?"

"Yeah, that's what she did," lies Haeju.

"How did you find me?" snaps Yoongi, and Haeju wants to walk out of there.

"I, er"

"Come in," says Yoongi, looking exasperated, and he walks away, leaving the door wide open. Haeju stands there for a minute before following him, making a mental note of punching Jungkook later.

The somewhat spacious room is a mess, fitting for two young men. There are posters all over the walls, and discarded shirts decorate the barely visible floor. Yoongi sits on his bed and grabs the book he was apparently reading before Haeju interrupted, and says nothing as his eyes glue to the novel.

"Um..." Haeju doesn't know what to say. "I, um, just asked around for you."

"I don't like people asking for me," says Yoongi, flipping a page. "If I wanted to be found, I would just walk around campus, waving like a pageant winner."

"I'm sorry," mumbles Haeju, and Yoongi looks up from his book.

"For what?" he asks, and his voice sounds softer.

"Bothering you," shrugs Haeju. "I just really want to get a good grade and I got worried when you didn't show up."

"Well... I was considering dropping that class anyway," huffs Yoongi. "I won't, my parents would kill me, but whatever. And you can sit down on Hoseok's bed, he won't mind."

Haeju walks over to the bed and sits cautiously, cringing as she feels something poke her butt. "An action figure?" she snorts, grabbing the tiny toy in disbelief.

"Don't judge," mocks Yoongi. "Fuck, so... here's the thing. We're partners, not friends. We'll just figure out our schedules and meet at the library and whatnot. I have no time for chitchat and gettoknowyouexercises."

"I didn't-" starts Haeju, enraged at Yoongi's rant.

"And if I see your boyfriend sniffing around," says Yoongi darkly. "I will go to Miss Dawes and tell her to assign me another partner."

"Boyfriend?" asks Haeju.

"Don't play stupid with me," says Yoongi, and he's not looking at her anymore. "Jeon Jungkook, managing editor of the campus newspaper. Everybody's favorite plaid wearing, sports loving jock."

Yoongi sounds definitely resentful, and Haeju is feeling more and more puzzled.

"He tried to interview me last semester," says Yoongi finally. "Tell him he's not getting his interview through you. I'm not an idiot, you know."

What? Jungkook never mentioned trying to interview Yoongi last semester. Haeju feels used, and she stands up.

"He never mentioned that to me... and Jungkook is not my boyfriend," says Haeju, trying to sound calm.

"Whatever he is," says Yoongi dismissively. "You have been warned."

"And how do you know about me and Jungkook being friends, anyway?" asks Haeju, realizing something. "You acted like you had never seen me before just a few minutes ago."

Yoongi doesn't respond, and for the first time ever, he looks nervous. He bites his lower lip, the sight extremely alluring, but Haeju isn't here for that, no. She shouldn't find this arrogant boy so attractive, not when she's hating his guts. Not when she is completely and madly in love with Jungkook, the most perfect man on Earth.

"My memory comes and goes, just like my body and soul," says Yoongi snobbishly. "Think of me as the Billy Pilgrim of modern times. You do know who Billy Pilgrim is, right? Unless you're not familiar with Vonnegut, which would be a shame..."

"You're so... ugh!" exclaims Haeju, frustration taking control of her. "What have I done to you? I just... I... ugh!"

"Ugh?" sneers Yoongi, looking like he's enjoying the scene. "Your word knowledge is Earth shattering! What a stunning display of verbal acuity!"

Haeju opens her mouth to retort but she freezes, her mind processing Yoongi's words. "What did you say?" she gasps.

Stunning display of verbal acuity. Acuity. Acuity. Maybe she's just reading too much into this, maybe the envelope on Jungkook's desk has made her paranoid.

"Verbal acuity, Baek," says Yoongi, sounding bored. "Now, if you don't mind, I would like to continue reading. We're about to find out who shot the model in the face."

Haeju notices that Yoongi is reading Invisible Monsters by Palahniuk, a novel that Haeju adores, but she doesn't say anything. She's too furious at him.

"You better attend the next lecture," says Haeju angrily, turning on her feet and reaching for the door. "See you around."

Haeju opens the door angrily, her rage not letting her breathe properly. And before she closes the door, Yoongi's sardonic voice reaches her ears.

"Guess you will."

xxxx

Haeju is glad she doesn't work at the bookstore today, she is getting a migraine. She sits on the couch, staring blankly at the TV and thinking of the day's events. One thing is for sure, Yoongi is a complete and absolute jerk.

No wonder people avoid him, no wonder Chaerin made snide remarks about him. He's the most unpleasant guy Haeju has ever met, and she can't believe she's supposed to become friends with him. No way, no how, not happening. And she needs to say this to Jungkook.

Someone knocks on the door and Haeju stands up slowly, still thinking terrible thoughts about Yoongi and his cold words, his indifference, his gorgeous eyes...

Stop it, thinks Haeju stubbornly. You are NOT attracted to him. He's a jerk!

She opens the door and all thoughts of Yoongi disappear when Jungkook smiles at her, and he's holding a box of pizza in his hands.

"Brought food, my lady," he winks, and Haeju smiles stupidly.

They settle in front of the TV after Haeju gets some sodas from the fridge, and they eat in silence for a minute. "So, what happened?" asks Jungkook, swallowing his bite.

"He's so... strange," says Haeju. She doesn't want to act like a hormonal teenager in front of Jungkook. "Very elusive and reserved... kind of."

"Really? Huh," muses Jungkook, reaching for another slice.

"You must know," says Haeju, suddenly remembering her brief conversation with Yoongi. "You did try to interview him last semester after all."

Jungkook starts choking on his slice, and Haeju crosses her arms, waiting for an explanation. Jungkook is red in the face and he's avoiding Haeju's eyes, his expression full of guilt.

"Oh, yeah, about that... um..." Jungkook coughs, and Haeju punches him in the arm. "Okay, ouch, sorry! I guess I owe you an explanation."

"You sure do," says Haeju crossly.

"Um, well..." Jungkook puts down his slice and wipes his fingers with a napkin as he takes a deep breath. "See, the last text sent from Yanmi's phone the night she died, um, funnily enough... it was sent to Yoongi."

"Excuse me?" breathes Haeju.

"He kind of was a person of interest in Yanmi's murder," says Jungkook quickly. "Oh, hey, should we rent a movie or something?"

"What?" bellows Haeju, standing on her feet. "A person of interest? Why didn't you tell me this? Jungkook, what were you thinking?"

"My source in the police department wanted me to keep quiet about it!" says Jungkook defensively. "But Yoongi didn't do it, he had an alibi! But my source said that he definitely knew something about the murder but he was very reserved about the whole thing. They had nothing against him so they had to dismiss him and"

"You lied to me!" snaps Haeju.

"No, I..." Jungkook grins sheepishly. "I just hid some facts from you."

"You suck, Jungkook!" says Haeju, turning away from him, her ears burning. She hears when Jungkook stands up, and she shivers when he places a hand on her shoulder.

"Haeju, look at me." Haeju waits for a couple minutes before turning to face Jungkook. "Haeju... I know he won't hurt you. I know some things about him, and I know he won't. But I need you to get close to him so the whole Yanmi thing can get solved."

"This is not your job," sighs Haeju. Jungkook's hand reaches for hers, and the warmth of the action makes Haeju blush.

"I need this article, darling," he says, using the voice he always uses to charm girls. He has never used it on Haeju, and this sort of shocks her. "Dad is still seething about my major, and I need this to prove that I can do this. I need you, Haeju."

"He doesn't trust me," says Haeju in defeat. "Because I'm friends with you. He implied it." Jungkook seems thoughtful for a moment, and then grins at Haeju.

"We'll have a fight," says Jungkook. "A public, nasty fight. A fight so bad that it will make me look like a jerk and people will think that you will never talk to me again. Preferably in front of Yoongi."

"But surely people will notice we still talk to each other if we hang out," says Haeju, her heart dropping at Jungkook's eagerness to be apart, if only for show.

"We won't hang out in public, that's all," chuckles Jungkook. "But we can hang out here at your apartment, my dorm is a nono.

It'll be fun, Haeju. Just you and me, hanging out, watching movies... it will be perfect."

Haeju can't deny that it sounds pretty darn fantastic. She sighs, pretending to consider Jungkook's idea, and then she gives him a sad look.

"Jungkook, what are we getting into?" she says quietly, and Jungkook's arms wrap around her, pulling Haeju close to him.

"Just... trust me and get to know him," says Jungkook into her ear. "I will owe you so much. And I'll make sure you're protected in all of this. I don't want you to get hurt, okay? Because I... Well, you know I love you more than anything."

"Whwhat?" asks Haeju, suddenly realizing that Jungkook's face is too close to hers.

"I..." mumbles Jungkook, leaning in. "Um... I..."

The door opens and Chaerin walks in, supported by an annoyed looking boy who is wearing a beanie. Chaerin is obviously drunk, and her makeup is a mess, and her speech is slurred.

Haeju blinks, and she realizes that Jungkook has let go of her, his cheeks very red.

"What happened?" asks Haeju, trying to swallow her disappointment.

"Chaeku broke up with me!" cries Chaerin, pulling at the boy's collar. "I got drunk and mad, and more drunk and mad! Hoseok had to bring me, but I don't need any of you Jung boys looking after me, you pricks, you cheating"

"Can you grab her?" groans Hoseok, and Jungkook and Haeju quickly retrieve Chaerin from Hoseok's arms.

"Your brother is a cheating manwhore!" bellows Chaerin. "Tell him I hope that fucking dance major gives him STIs!"

"Will relay the message," says Hoseok sarcastically, taking off his beanie and bowing in a mocking way. Haeju notices something resembling a silver circle tattooed on the back of Hoseok's neck, but the boy quickly stands up straight, putting his hat back on. "I've done my job."

Hoseok closes the door after him and Chaerin holds on to Haeju, sobbing in despair. "He's seeing someone else," gasps Chaerin, and Haeju hugs her tightly.

"I have to go, but... yeah, we'll do what we talked about, okay?" says Jungkook uneasily, not looking at Haeju in the eye.

"Okay," says Haeju neutrally. Jungkook gives them a last look and leaves, and Chaerin starts crying harder. Haeju runs a hand through Chaerin's hair, trying to calm her down, but she feels like a

hypocrite and a fake.

She wants to break down and cry too.

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