#apparently moving a lot as a kid can be fuck people up pretty bad and we moved around a LOT a lot a lot

[s-sextape]

we know we’re a system but like how the fuck do we know if it’s because of some kinda trauma or if our brain’s just Like That for no fucking reason. i

k nvermind probably trauma we jsut remembered the existence of our childhood and all the Ooh No Fun Times For You ! things

[olderthannetfic]

I'm IWTV-wank-avoidance-asking Anon and it kinda missed me that it would be a wanky topic lol I was trying to see if the show is worth watching. A lot of my mutuals are posting IWTV gifs so I assume it's good, but I was curious if anyone who read the novel would think "Better read the novel". I don't realize an asking-for-rec ask would be wanky, but now that I think about who the writer is, it kinda makes sense. My bad lol

--

Ahahahaha.

Around here, I don't think anyone is precious enough about Anne Rice to start the genuine version of this wank, but Rice fandom can be... uh... very intense even on top of Rice herself having been the queen of drama.

You know about Red Beans Anne Rice, right?

Many years ago, Anne got all butthurt about a tacky-ass restaurant taking over an abandoned building that she'd had Lestat being emo in in one of the books. Instead of gothic atmosphere, it was now very PINK and LOUD. So she wasted money taking out ads in the local paper as Lestat trying to shame the restaurant owner... at which point a bunch of other restaurant owners also wasted money to respond in newspaper ads saying that they welcomed fellow businesspeople. It all ended in the restaurant's grand opening and people with plates of "Red beans Anne Rice" (i.e. red beans and rice).

--

Anyway, I read the first book back in the 90s when I was like 15. It's decent from what I remember. The thing that made it iconic when it came out in 1976 was that it was pretty heavily pushing the vampire=drug addict metaphor. This is everywhere in sexy goth sadboi vampire media now, but it wasn't as much of a thing at the time.

It was also very, very gay but in that way where (at least in the first book), nobody really says the word. That meant something in the 70s. Even by the 90s, it wasn't such a big deal, and it's a big nothingburger in the 2020s.

Book 1 is Rice dealing with the death of her child. It's all about suicidal feelings and Catholic weirdness. The main character is Louis, a.k.a. Rice's self-insert (which she confirmed herself).

Books 2 onward are about Lestat's dick.

He becomes a rockstar, vampire-bones the ur vampire, which causes him to mega level up, thus enabling him to thwart her plot to kill all men on earth aside form a few for breeding purposes, bodyswaps so he has a working penis again, fucks a nun, swaps back, gets Louis back by trying to commit suicide and accidentally getting a tan, etc... Much, much later books are about the other bonkers vampires, most of them more in the horny rockstar mold than the sad mommy of dead baby one.

In book 1, Louis is a depressed plantation owner who eats a bunch of his slaves among other fucked up shit. Claudia, their vampire daughter, is a small child who is upset about being stuck as a kid forever. One of the more disturbing parts is when Louis finds out she's fucking adult men. Lestat turns out to be a French nobleman with mommy issues despite Louis thinking he was only pretending to be upper class.

-- The TV series moved the entire plot much later in history, made Louis black, and gave him a spine. Some racists cried about this and some of tumblr cried about how it was offensive to take the plantation owner and make him black instead of doing that with the other one.

The show also made it more overt that Lestat is an abusive jackass boyfriend. This apparently came as a surprise to people with poor reading comprehension. Others have wanked about fans still liking Louis/Lestat instead of Louis/less terrible boyfriends. But... like... It's IWTV. What did they expect?

(So yes, some book fans will be immensely wanky about the show. Ignore them.)

Also, I hear they fuck on the show? Rice's vampires don't have working junk, which we know because Lestat stands in front of an entire wall of mirrors in the most bougie bathroom ever in Akasha's evil lair and discusses how his penis—I mean "The Organ"—no longer does anything.

Also, Armand in the books is the 14-year-old kept boy of a Renaissance painter with a harem of boys or something like that. (It's been a very long time since I read these.) Shit like this never makes it into the adaptations.

--

If you're curious about the history of vampire media or about a certain kind of Southern gothic shit, sure, read the books, particularly the first one with its radically different tone and much greater historical importance.

The old movie is a decent adaptation of book 1, though it makes it less gay (or at least removes Louis' weird boner for his dead brother) and messes with the ending in a way that would have made sequels veer off from the books. I haven't seen that other old movie with Aaliyah, but it looks like a campy time capsule of baaaad movies of that era.

Anyway, no, you don't need to read the book before watching the show. They changed a massive amount of stuff.

I'm in more of a Chinese media phase right now, but a bunch of friends have watched and said the show is genuinely good.

[weebsinstash]

Hello! I don’t know if you do this but I was wondering what your thoughts were for a Yandere Lucifer Morningstar from Hazbin Hotel? I’m having trouble writing a good representation of him and would like some advice.

Honestly I'm gonna humble myself and say that it took reading someone else's post to make me like, REALLY notice the nuances of Lucifer's character

This post right here literally made me rewatch his scenes and go "oh wow he IS like DANGEROUSLY DEPRESSED"

He doesn't remember Charlie told him where she is, or what she's doing, and he can barely follow a conversation despite clearly trying to pay attention. He also just seems kind of scattered, and um, HE LITERALLY MAKES A JOKE ABOUT DYING FROM FALLING OFF THE HOTEL BALCONY like dude is making jokes about death in front of his fucking daughter, like my dudes, I think this guy is BARELY holding himself together

He clearly loves loves LOVES Charlie but he doesn't really know how to properly articulate himself and I have a feeling there's a lot he's concealing from her, and another big question is, is his depression from being cast out of Heaven, or from something to do with his missing wife, or a combination of both? Either way this man is clearly dealing with like, really bad issues. And Charlie also mentioned he wasn't around a whole lot when she was younger, so... did he have depression back then too?

So, that all said, I feel like a yandere Lucifer would almost be, potentially invigorated by his darling? Given a new lease on life? He may not be 100% his old self again but, you get him to like, 65, maybe 70% on a good day. You give him another reason to get out of bed in the morning, or afternoon, or evening or, whenever he can drag his depressed ass out of bed

Given what we currently know, I feel like a romantic yandere Lucifer would pretend to only be platonic and do his best to poorly conceal his feelings because of his whole... "can't ask his missing wife if it's ok for you to be their third" ordeal, the man still wears his wedding ring, and a platonic yandere Lucifer basically adopts you like another kid, because uh, I mean for one he apparently canonically missed a lot of Charlie's childhood, and he's also an ancient fallen angel, so he's got that age advantage on you no matter how old you are. I mean what are a few decades when he's literally thousands upon thousands upon thousands--you get the idea

Yandere Lucifer would want to stay close to you, helping watch over you, maaaaaybe being overly paranoid about you randomly disappearing and going missing For Very Obvious Reasons, and in the process he winds up being unintentionally overbearing. I mean, he did it in irritation, but he basically showed up at Charlie's hotel immediately saying it was a dump and all of HER FRIENDS were 'a bunch of losers'. He never completely pulls his punches when there's something he's displeased with, even if it has something to do with someone he loves, so his darling would get much of the same treatment. "Ohhhhh, you uh, you wanted to move across the city? That's, um, definitely a fun idea! BuuuuuUuuut, what IF, instead of doing that--", like, he tries to playfully tug you in 'the right direction' until you make him put his foot down

Hmmm... what would him losing his cool look like... well, we've already seen that he doesn't mind throwing hands and WILL KILL, but will stop if he's asked to or there's a good reason. With you, though, you're not typically going to be there to stop him from offing any rivals or bad influences, so I imagine he'd be kinda casual about it, actually! He already thinks pretty lowly of Sinners, so say he finds out you've been ditching him and Charlie to go out drinking with strangers, making new friends, maybe having a few one night stands? Yeah, some of those people definitely aren't calling you back, and Lucifer doesn't really see a problem with it. These people are kind of the worst and really don't deserve you, anyways! If anything he's helping clean up Hell for you and his daughter and keeping you safe :)

Losing his cool with YOU... I think would involve him using his powers to finally confine you, maybe even going demon mode to intimidate you into submission in a very dad-esque "now you listen HERE" kind of way. We don't really know the scope and scale of his powers but I can picture him at least being, obviously much stronger than he looks, and transforming to fly you "back home" where he puts you in your room where no one can reach you without his explicit permission (and you also can't leave~)

One second you're just drunk and jokingly defying him, teasing him, maybe even picking him up and swinging him around because you're bigger than him, to you he's just a silly little guy! Meanwhile this Grown Ass Man Who Is Also The Actual Devil is getting more than just a little frustrated you basically view him as a wacky little cartoon more than a grown man, one who has had sex and has had two wives and sired a child. You're just teasing him and stumbling around drunk when he's trying to get you to your hotel room to get to bed to sleep, like you're clearly not taking him seriously, maybe even playfully putting your hands on him (TOTALLY not riling him up in 'fun' ways) and he finally just huffs and snaps his fingers and, you're suddenly magic'd to bed! You're laying there blinking confused and he's tucking you in and chuckling that "you're such a handful!" before leaving you to sleep and somehow INSTANTLY knowing when you're up.

You ARE in his house, after all...

Not to be gross but uh..... I'm not saying "yandere Lucifer who has the power to still get a Sinner pregnant if he wanted to and you wind up fooling around with him and you're waking up with his little apple symbol on your lower tummy as one of those like hentai womb tattoos to show you're pregnant" but uhhhhhhhhhhyeah that's what I'm saying, and whether it was accidentally or intentionally, he's keeping it, and thus, keeping YOU

I just feel like he'd be very goofy and awkward and bad at hiding his feelings and being very clearly overprotective and jealous in ways everyone else but you manages to pick up on (god Alastor would have some MATERIAL) and, in a romantic/sexual setting he eventually just loses his patience with you not seeing him as a man and just gets... progressively more forward. You pop back into the Hotel after a night out and Lucifer's already hammered at the bar with Husk, stumbling up to you, hanging off of you, slurring and embarrassing himself, "You'reeeee SO pretty... like SO pretty.... do you wanna have *BELCH* you wanna fuck? Cause I LOVE to fuck, like when I FUCKED my wife to make my DAUGHTER, my wife and daughter that I have, 'cuz im a DAD, 'cuz I'm a MAN!" and you're just giggling and ruffling his hair, "You're so weird, dude ^^" and walking away while Lucifer internally screams, wondering just how DIRECT with you he's going to have to be

meanwhile Charlie is totally cool with all of this and sees this as a weird double whammy of Curing Dad's Depression + new family member and friend hurray! and she's totally actively either shipping you with her dad or aiding and abetting him in his weird attempts to absorb you into the Morningstar family

[bonny-kookoo]

Jungkook

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐬 [Part 1]

How come someone like him seems to be the only one who care about someone like you, when you both couldn't be anymore different?

Tags/Warnings: Non-Idol Jungkook, Dog Hybrid!Reader, former criminal!Jungkook, mentions of past neglect/abuse, reader has some pretty bad psychological problems (OCD, Anxiety, Selective mutism, hints at an eating disorder), hypersomnia, old to recovery, hurt and lots of comfort, angst, Jungkook has some problems with aggression and swears a lot, more TBA in future chapters

Length: ~2k words

There is no taglist for this fic.

A/N: You can have early access to this and other selected fics on my Patreon!

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Jungkook has always been a bit of a troublemaker.

The world isn't too kind to soft hearts, and growing up, he quickly got a taste of what reality is like past his, back then, rosy tinted glasses. Having to grow up fast, no one cares much if you're exhausted by the speed of time at any point. You're supposed to earn good money, work well and a lot, be something at a young age other than a simple kid. There's no time for childhood nowadays, and he hates it, feels as if it's all a sick joke.

Kids want to be grown up's, while he as an adult just wants to be a kid again.

But even so, he also knows that the way of making room for his aggression by being violent, vandalizing and committing other petty crimes isn't right either. He's not stupid- he's just at a breaking point. Nothing makes him happy anymore, and it's tiring. Other people are happy, so why can't he be?

The social work at the hybrid care center had been a last resort from the court to get him to change- and he knows that he really got away with a slap on the wrist for the very last time- considering the fact that he broke someone's bones in an act of personal revenge, he's aware that someone else might've not gotten such a gentle verdict.

He's glad, no question- but now he's just more lost than ever.

Does he even want to be a part of a society that's clearly fucked up? After all, just one look at you reminds him why he's even gotten so angry in the first place. You're a part of a new sub-species of humans, something you couldn't control and neither ever asked for. It's a fact that you can't change and yet everyone treats you and other hybrids like lesser beings. People advocate online for hybrids rights just to then indulge in shopping sprees, buying clothes and makeup cheaply produced by or tested on exactly those hybrids they're saying they want to save. Humanity already had problems seeing members of their own species as humans. It's hilarious to him that they created such a thing such as hybrids thinking it could go well.

But humans have always been like this.

"You've got a stalker." Hana, the social worker snickers a little, making Jungkook sigh in annoyance. Not at you, but at her- however, she's not wrong.

He is being stalked.

And while anybody else would be freaking out about it, he's not- he's more or less just confused, because all the workers seem to be just as caught off guard as he himself is. Didn't they say you've been here for four years already? Surely he's not the only one who'd tried to befriend you, right?

Apparently he is, because your behavior seems to be new to everyone, even experienced staff and other permanent hybrids in the facility raising their eyebrows at your actions.

Now, you're not stalking him in a creepy way, let's get that put aside here first and foremost. You never get close to him at all actually. But you seem to expect him to eat his lunch with you at this point, and you're always somewhere in the background wherever he works. It's like long-distance-clinginess in a way, as weird as it sounds. Following his every move, while trying to stay undetected.

It made him dig up a bit more about you.

He kind of wishes he didn't.

Because the images he'd seen made him genuinely nauseous, ruining his appetite for the rest of the day, the sight of your 'cage' in your old home and your physical condition when you were found enough to stay in the back of his head for days. And it makes your tiny little efforts to cling onto him even more heartbreaking, in a way, because he isn't even particularly kind or anything. He's just acting normal.

And maybe that's what you need.

"Hey." he kicks your socked foot with his boot, not looking at you directly because he knows that makes you nervous. Eye contact seems to scare the living shit out of you, and he can't help but feel like he doesn't even want to know why exactly that is. "You've been rotting inside the entire week." he says, and you shrug. He's noticed that too. While you don't talk, it's not like you don't communicate like he's been told. In fact, you're quite the chatterbox if any of the workers would make any effort to interpret even just the basics of body language, but he just assumes they're all too busy with the other hybrids.

He can't even be mad at them. The care center is horribly understaffed.

"No, none of that." he makes a disagreeing sound in his throat. "Go get your shoes or something. You can stalk me outside, get some fucking sunlight and fresh air." he mumbles, and thoroughly expects you to just stay seated with no reaction. But you slowly get up and dig out your shoes from a very corner. They're dusty, he notices. How long has it been since someone took you outside?

Fuck, he can feel himself getting angry again.

It's unfair how you're just left to rot away in this place, even if it's better than living homeless on the streets as a stray. It's not life you're living here. You're just existing, waiting for the end to come. He makes a mental note to maybe buy you new shoes. Cheap ones, so you don't feel bad. But these gray and torn sneakers won't do.

Outside, he helps staff with heavy lifting and other work that requires muscle- something he enjoys. Taking off his sweater due to the heat, he's quick to notice you in the shade of the trees, sitting on a stone away from the other hybrids. "It's been a long time since she's been outside on her own accord." hana says in an almost melancholic way. "I wish we had more time for her. But there's always gonna be the one's that get left behind."

Jungkook doesnt answer. All he wants to do is swear anyways.

Out of the corner of his eyes he can see how you're slowly taking interest in the things around you; cars driving past the yard gates, people walking, bustling city just a few meters away from you. Your ears twist and turn to catch all the sounds, but you don't seem anxious. He wonders what you're thinking. "I'll get your food, don't worry. You can take a break outside with her, it's a somewhat special occasion after all." Hana smiles, before walking inside with the other hybrids, leaving Jungkook and you almost alone apart from some staff who continue to clean the yard through their breaks.

"You like car rides?" Jungkook wonders, sitting down on the blanket someone had laid out for you a little earlier. He wipes his slightly dirty hands on his pants without much care, before looking around. "I fall asleep if I'm not the one driving." he shrugs, earning a poke from you finger to gain his attention. You motion to him, then to a car. He chuckles a little. "Yeah I've got a car. And a license too, don't worry. I do follow the law sometimes." He jokes, and while there's no obvious reaction, he does spot the corners of your lips twitch.

It's a start.

You still only eat your bland hybrid pellets, not having swayed from that at all, though he did notice how you seem interested in certain snacks he brings for himself sometimes. "Hm?" he holds a small piece of cheese towards you, and for the first time, you seem to think about it.

Will he be mad if you eat it? Will staff be mad if they realize you've taken it? What if other hybrids notice?

Jungkook clicks his tongue, putting the little piece he'd broken off on top of your bowl of dry pellets, before continuing to eat himself, giving you some room to breathe by not focusing touch on what you might do.

And suddenly, the next moment his eyes find your bowl, the piece of cheese is gone. But what he also notices is your shoulders shaking a little.

"Fuck, are you crying?" he panics a little, and yes, there's small tears running down your cheeks. He takes the fabric of his own shirt he's wearing to clumsily wipe them off, earning a sound he realizes is a giggle of all things out of you. "Oh fuck you, I thought I did something wrong!" he laughs a bit relieved now, watching the way your lips curl into a smile.

You don't look at him, and that's fine- he's glad he's already made such huge progress with you.

"Come on now, ditch that shit and have some of mine today. Except if you're gonna have a mental breakdown over it or something, they're gonna behead me if they notice you're crying 'cause of me and I really need this job." he jokes, making you shake your head. You don't eat immediately, but rather take what he offers- the situation ending in Jungkook basically feeding you scraps of his lunch. Not too much at once as to not upset your stomach or anything- but it's a start.

It makes him think.

He can't adopt you since he's got a criminal record, so that's off the table. He can't even foster you because he doesn't have any training in hybrid care. But maybe, just maybe, he's got a little big trick up his sleeve- a favor from a friend that owes him big time. He knows it's yet again not quite legal what he's thinking of, but there's many people who own hybrids 'around the corner'- someone else written on paper than who there actually living with. It's not illegal- but also not quite the way it was intended.

However, all he knows is that he needs to get you out of here. So when he goes back home that day, he cleans out his apartment in a way he's not done in years. He needs to change himself to maybe have a chance in court. Prove that he's changed. Prove that with you at his side, he won't ever step out of legal boundaries again.

And suddenly, while he's busy boiling a kettle of water, an idea sparks in his head.

Yes, he thinks to himself. That might just work.

But just as he turns off the stove and grabs his keys for his car to drive over to his friend's apartment to talk to him about his plans, he realizes he's missing something.

Where's his sweater?

[androgynousblackbox]

How I Met Your Father. 3 [Appleradio, Radioapple]

A03 link

"Ssssoo, let me get this sstraight" started out Sir Pentious, their newest resident at the hotel, after taking a zip from the glass that Husk had just served him at the bar. "You mean to tell me that Alassstor, one of my oldest archnemessis, actually had a daughter all along. Who wass the princess of hell. Because he wass married all along to Lucifer and nobody knew about it. And that iss why he iss here at the hotel."

"Yeah, pretty much you got it" confirmed Husk, serving a new martini for Angel.

"And when I ssigned to sstay here, I alsso signed away any chance to ever tell it to anyone because no one should know for ssome reasson" added the snake man, trying to digest that information. Now it made sense why Charlie had insisted on the "not talk about my family outside of his hotel, I am sorry, please, I tried to change it but now I can't, just please don't do it" when he had the contract in front of him.

"Or you lose the ability to speak, text, corse mode or whatever else ever again" confirmed Angel. "Kinda paranoid if you ask me, but what are you gonna do? Still beats paying rent."

Sir Pentious looked pensative, lost in thought. After a while he finally reached to the one true question he wanted to ask.

"How?"

"How what?" Husk took a drink from his own bottle.

"I mean, that guy?" Sir Pentious turned around to see Alastor on the opposite side of the living room, taking a cup of coffee while gently moving his feet at the tune playing on the radio at his side. If it wasn't for the shadows dancing all around his little corner with cruel mocking smiles it could have been a peaceful picture. He quickly turned again when he could feel some of the shadows looking at him back. "Am I the only one who doessn't undersstand how he landed with Lucifer of all people? Nobody hass sseen the king in agess. I even heard rumorss of people thinking he had died yearss ago."

"Mmm, you know, that is not a bad question" Angel looked over to Husk. "Any input from your side, kitty?"

"Call me kitty again and see what happens" grumbled Husk, with a frown.

"Fine, fine. For the sake of science. Husk. Would you mind sharing the tea of what the fuck is up with smiley face?"

"You think I have a fucking clue of what that guy does or doesn't do? I have none" Husk also threw a glare to the corner of Alastor, that of course Alastor immediately returned with a friendly wave. Fucking bastard. "One day he called me over to bartend on some bullshit dance club he had set up in the palace with a new ring on his finger and saying he wanted to dance with his husband. When I asked what the hell was he talking about, he quite literally told me to mind my own business. I thought he had finally lost his god damn mind until I saw Lucifer appear with him using a matching ring. Next thing I know he is summoning me again to take care of a toddler he had apparently made so they could go on a date. Not a single explanation of where that toddler even came from, how it happened or why was he even calling me. Do I even look like a fucking babysitter?"

"You do look soft and huggable" commented Angel, looking him down and up. The comment, for once, didn't even seem to have a sexual innuendo, just a mere observation. "I can see kids liking that."

Husk rolled his eyes.

"Whatever. The point I was trying to get at, I am just as clueless as everyone else. I asked Charlie once if she knew how her parents met and she just said that I should ask them, because she thinks they tell the story so much better."

"But there is a story" Angel smiled, swiveling from side to side on his chair. "Oh, I bet it involves a dungeon somewhere. Can you imagine that is how they met? The king with a secret taste for BDSM finding his match there? Being the king has to create such a great pressure. Lots of powerful people relax with a good beating at the hands of someone else. I can see something like that happening. And wouldn't you know it, our smiley friends loves to give a good beating too. Now that would be a good movie I would watch."

Husk stared at him like he, too, had lost his entire mind. Then he seemed to think better about it and reclined on the bar. Truth be told, it was also the first time he got to talk about this with someone else since Alastor had also put the same condition of silence on him and Niffty.

"No, no, you know what? I bet there was some kind of contract involved. I just don't buy that guy getting romantic with anyone without a motive."

"I concord with Hussk there" added Sir Pentious, nodding. "He just doessn't sstrike me ass the romantic type either. Maybe it wass a form of blackmail over the king? Ssomething to hold againsst him unless he complied?"

"Mmm, that can be hot too" considered Angel. "But having a kid for a blackmail? Kinda extreme, doesn't it? And didn't you just said that they went on dates and what not? Isn't that too much effort for the bit?"

"Anyone can go out in dates with anyone, that doesn't meant that they aren't hiding something" Husk was getting more convinced of his own words the more he spoke. "And listen, you don't know the guy for as long I do. He would do anything to get what he wants. I once saw him devouring a guy just to get his coat. Playing the role of caring hubby just to get something out of it is not really out of the realm of possibilities. And there is a lot to gain from the king of hell himself."

"Jeez, okay, I got it, romance is dead and you killed it" Angel swivelled again, turning around. Charlie now was talking with Alastor about something. All the shadows had dissapeared and it was just the radio demon hanging to her every word. "I am just saying, if that is acting then that is one hell of an actor right there. And I should know as the only one with a job in front of a camera."

"Well, perhapss with Charlie iss different" conceded Sir Pentious. "It's alwayss different when it comes to your own children, I ssuppose."

"I don't know" Husk crossed his arms, trying to think of any sign of Alastor having anything else than affection for his daughter and, if he had to be honest, he was coming out with nothing. But that could also be entirely an ego thing to preserve his own legacy or something along those lines. "Well, fine, maybe. I still won't believe for a second that Alastor just so happened to end up with Lucifer out of the goodness of his heart. I just would like to know what he did to convince the king to go along with that plan."

"Maybe he is just really good at seduction" offered Angel. "And the king was so lonely, with his million of bucks in that huge empty castle and no one to share it with. Damn, I can almost see it. Smiley coming up with all the aces under his sleeves and charming him to his feet. The poor guy didn't stand a chance."

"For the guy who invented temptation? You think he would be that desperate?"

"Hell yeah, why not? I have seen uglier people pocketting hotter partners all the time. Charm and the right words will get you very far, Husky. Which reminds me to ask you, is Lucifer hot? I always pictured him with this massive and thick bulg…"

"Charlie, dear!" Sir Pentious said it louder than neccesary for the two of them to drop the subject already as the princess was approaching them. Alastor himself was nowhere to be seen. "We were jusst talking… about…"

"My favorite dildo broke and I got to buy a new one. Sad hours here."

Husk lifted both his hands in a clear request to know why the hell was Angel like that, while Sir Pentious looked about ready to offer himself to the exorcists. Angel shrugged in response. It was the very first thing that came to his mind. Charlie froze a moment in place, blushing before she regained her train of thought.

"Oh, well. For as fascinating of a topic that is, um, I was thinking that for the next exercise we could all get around in a circle tonight and talk about a happy memory that we all have!"

"That ssoundss like a lovely idea, dear."

"Whatever you say, princess."

Husk thought about it before answering.

"Is Alastor going to participate?"

"Yes, of course! I just told him about it and he is excited too."

Knowing the princess, that "excited" very well could have been polite interest.

"Mmm, you know what I was thinking, kiddo? When you were little, you always said that he was so good telling stories. I myself am not the best storyteller unfortunately. Why don't you get him to tell one of those stories for us? Maybe of how your parents end up together or something uplifting like that. To get us all in the best mood."

Charlie gasped loudly, clapping his hands against her cheeks.

"That is an amazing idea, uncle! I know everyone will love that! I will go tell him that right now!"

The moment the princess went up the stairs, probably to look for the demon back at his studio, Angel raised his glass to Husk.

"Master of subtlety, aren't ya?"

"Hey, I had to try at least once" He wasn't exactly happy for using the trust of Charlie on him like that, but he had spent decades wondering too much and wasn't going to spoil a chance when it presented itself to him. "I doubt that Alastor is going to even tell the truth with her in the room, but at least I will know what he told her about it."

"That iss besst than nothing, I guess" Sir Pentious sighed. "Do you all realizze that meanss Alasstor iss technically the king of hell too? And he jusst… doesn't do anything about it? The more I think about it, the weirder it getss."

"I am telling you, he is getting his kicks beating the king and enjoying that money. I am no sadist myself, but if the price is right I will make an exception."

Sir Pentious finished his drink and looked at his glass, as if looking the courage to say what was on his mind.

"Wanna bet?"

"Fuck yeah, bitch. How much?"

"What part of he is probably not going to say the truth in front of Charlie did not register? No kid wants to hear that their parents are together out of convenience and Alastor is not stupid enough to not know that."

"Oh, come on, whiskers, at least we can have some fun about it. Even among the bullshit we could find something true."

"You haven't seen the layers of bullshit Alastor is on."

"Hey, if you are too scared to even play, I get it. Pussy" Angel pronnounced the word like a kiss, with a smile.

Husk looked at him. Quickly, as if taking out a gun in a shooting, he took out his wallet. Oh, he would be damned if someone suggested he was too scared to play. His old pride as a gambling overlord was on the line.

"I bet you it's a completely bullshit made up story about being a meet cute, just to please Charlie."

"Now we are talking! I bet that Alastor will talk about having "especial interests" together and finding "mutual satisfaction" in each other."

"I bet itss going to involve Alasstor being the one with the initiative and the main driving force!"

Established the rates in, Husk set up the betting money on a little safe that he never used because nobody ever paid for their drinks there. All they had left to do was wait.

--

At the afternoon, they were surprised to find Alastor already sat on the couch. That alone wasn't surprising, but it was the white snake wrapped around his neck that Charlie reacted with absolute delight upon seeing it.

"Aww! And what is this doing here?" cooed, going up to the couch as the snake extended to her through Alastor's shoulder, flicking it's slitted tongue against her cheek and then it's head against her.

"Oh, this? Just a little snack for later that I found in the backyard" answered Alastor, his smile only growing bigger when the snake flicked it's tail to him, clearly pissed.

"Noooo, don't eat the little guy!" said Charlie, for some reason laughing to herself as she petted the white head, which seemed to instantly calm him down. "He is being so good right now, be nice, dad."

"Oh, well, I will consider it just because you ask, dear" Alastor chuckled, gently scratching under the chin of the snake with his claws. "After all, he is quite a lovely specimen, isn't he?"

It sounded like his words were more directed at the animal than to Charlie. The snake made a huffing motion, but end returning to wrap around Alastor's neck and settled himself there. When everyone else gathered around, Alastor accomodated on his seat petting the snake absentmindedly, letting his fingers run through the white body that looked perfectly relaxed on his place.

Charlie, in the other hand, turned to a confused Vaggie and whispered something on her ear that made her let out a silent oh. She smiled and gave a small head nod to the snake, that perked up upon seeing her, flickering his tongue.

Weird, but nobody really felt like questioning too much. After seeing a demon pulled out tentacles, shadows, musical instruments and other things out of mid air without making any effort, it was easy to just accept another oddity. At least this one wasn't deadly.

"Alright, everyone, thanks for coming!" started Charlie, as it was usual for all her bonding exercises. "Some of you have been very brave coming out today and we are so proud of you!" Charlie smiled in direction to Alastor, where the tail of the snake waggled against his coat. "As you all know, I wanted us to share a happy memory of each of us. It can be anything that you want as long it's something that makes you smile when you think about it. Does anyone want to be first? Angel?" asked when he saw the spider demon raising his hand.

Husk rolled his eyes, preparing himself to hear something about drugs or sex, probably both at the same time. Sir Pentious looked at the ceiling, brazing himself.

"One time I lost Fat Nuggets on the mall" started Angel. "I was like crazy looking for him everywhere. After a while I saw that he was waiting for me in the entrance with my phone in his mouth. I had been so focused in finding him, that I haven't even notice at all I had lost my phone even before coming in. It almost made me shit my pants, but it was also nice to see how smart he is."

The room stayed silent for a full second, everyone staring at him as if waiting for the punchline to drop. Angel laughed.

"What? I mean, if you are all dying to hear the more spicier memories then you can just ask! I have so many I wouldn't know which one to choose from! I could tell you about this time I…"

There it was.

"No, no, thank you, it's okay!" Charlie quickly interjected it. "Thank you, Angel, that was really lovely! Who is next?"

Sir Pentious shared a memory of finishing his first weapon of destruction after weeks of trying it out. The fact that it had destroyed the building he was in rather than the target didn't mattered at all to him, because at last it was doing something destructive at least. Vaggie talked about her first date with Charlie, in which she got to see a movie for the first time in her life and later have pizza at Charlie's apartment. They did nothing else that day and it was still the best day she could have wished. The simple retelling brighten up Charlie's face.

Her own happy memory was visiting Lu Lu World for the first time with her parents. She throw up three times, one for excitement and the other two for going to the roller coasters despite dad's warning. Her parents argued about letting her eat too much. But she always remembered when the night came and Lucifer taught her how to make fireworks out of her own hands, while Alastor looked up from the ground.

When everyone quietly decided to move on from the happy memory of Niffty that included a rusty knife and a kneecap she got to keep, Charlie turned to Alastor.

"Dad, your turn. Please?" asked, making the puppy eyes that she knew neither of her parents could resist for long.

"Alright, alright" Alastor sighed as if fighting a great resistance. "Per request of my little fawn, I guess I have no option but to bring up the time I met her father as my happy memory. Charlie heard this so many times that she must be sick and tired of it" added with a grin, seeing Charlie grab onto her crossed legs sat on the floor, exactly as when she was a kid about to hear it for the first time.

The ears of Husk perked, even though nothing on his whole posture changed. By now his biggest concern was to win the bet than to try to decipher how much Alastor was about to lie through his yellow teeth.

"Well, as you all must be aware of by now, my husband is the king of all hell and also a very private person" started the man, caressing the white snake that lifted his head to nuzzle his cheek. "So naturally he needed guards to keep the defenses up of his castle and keep anyone out. But not just about any sinner would do, no. I applied for the job out of mere and pure curiosity. How was our invisible king going to be? Was he going to be a monster worthy of hell, a nightmare I couldn't even begin to understand, or the pure image born out of heaven that he was originally? Maybe a combination of the two, the meaning of corruption? I just couldn't resist not knowing at all.

At that point my career as an overlord wasn't anything to scuff at. My own power made me thirsty for knowledge, to get where not any other sinner had been before. The king Asmodeus was the one to see all the candidates. He, as a close friend to the king and concerned for his wellbeing, wanted to garanteed that the peace of the king would not be disturbed by having the most capable

So naturally he made us all fight in an arena to see by himself who among us were the strongest. I could go on about all the gorey details of what I did with those sinner, but my little fawn is not a fan, so I will skip those for now. Unfortunately I got a little carried away myself, so there was no viable coworkers for me to share the position with by the time I was done. There were also no witnesses left. Truly tragic.

As soon Asmodeus saw I was clearly the superior choice, that is when I got installed in the palace to do my job.

As it turns out, the king of hell was so busy with his own royal issues that I didn't get to see him at all during my first week. Not the second. On the third I was already considering this could have been a huge waste of my time when I heard a melody from the garden. There, over the fountain, our dear beloved king was playing the violin over the waters.

He was certainly not a nightmare, nor a monster. A heaven dream they failed to appreciate and now was the ruler of his own kingdom, playing on his garden for no one. I let him finish the piece before talking. He knew about me and my face, of course. He first apologized profusely because of what Asmodeus had done "forcing me" to fight like that. He only had accepted that deal in the first place just for the peace of his friend, not his.

I told him, clear and direct, that I am only sorry I wasn't given more bodies to dispatch of. He just told me ah, so you are that kind of sinner. I should have known. He wasn't surprised or disgusted, neither ectatic and jumping in giddiness. The king of hell had seen every atrocity made by men since creation and their wickedness hold no wonder for him. It just was, the same way that the sky down here is red. No need to justify it or ponder too much about it.

I found it… refreshing, in a way. Living in hell, you would think people would be less squeamish and afraid of some dark humor, but you would be wrong. The lack of judgement from the one who was judged the harder made it so much easier to be at ease on his presence. From that day forward, seeing as he couldn't keep pretending that I wasn't there, we started having dinner together. At first our alimentary preferences were a bit of a struggle to get through. He insisted on putting sugar on almost everything he touched. I liked my meals as raw and bloody, a little decayed for extra flavor, which he didn't appreciate particularly when flies started appearing.

More than one time I considered quitting. More than one time he threatened with kicking me out. But for whatever reason, there was never enough conviction to do anything else but keep our distance for a day or two, until we ended up in the same table again. Little by little I started cooking some of my meals and he stopped trying to give me sweets all the time. Our chairs were getting closer so we could hear each other better. He talked to me about his interest or hobbies with no filter, even when I didn't want to hear, like he haven't had anyone to do that with in a long time.

It was a comfortable routine, and before I knew it, an entire year had already passed. I learned about what being a king entailed and whatever ambitions I had about it were very quickly squandered. Charlie, I am sorry, but it's literally the most boring job you will ever have. Endless paperwork, dealing with the whinning of all the rings, even more paperwork, taxes because this is hell, of course, and, in a shocking twist of event, more paperwork to go through. I did always tried my best to distract the king when I could so he wouldn't drown himself on that side of his job and I myself wouldn't die of boredom.

But going out was difficult for him, so I would do things like setting a fake jazz club in the party room so he would get that experience I quite enjoyed myself. Our Majesty wasn't only a enthusiastic lover of music, he also had the lightest feet on the floor I had ever seen. He could pick up the rythm almost instantly and follow along.

On that first date, we may have been carried away with our drinks. Particularly me, regrettably, because as it turns out, it takes a lot more than what a mortal soul can take to get the devil actually wasted. I don't even remember what I said or in what tone, or even how Lucifer responded at any of it, but at the next morning I knew that something had changed in our dynamic. A touch of hands that went a bit longer than ever before. A gaze that never wanted to quit. A smile without any apparent reason. We end spending almost all day just in the presence of each other. When we didn't, we still looked for each other.

How can you be surprised when inevitably things go even further? How can you be shocked when you see your king at the end of the hallway and think "ah, that is right. That is the man I will end up spending eternity with"? Lucifer proposed first only because I couldn't find the most appropiate ring before him."

At that point Alastor took out the glove that used only on one hand, revealing a golden ring in his finger.

"Pure magic in solid form. That is when I found out that rings given by the king of hell himself can't be taken out. The only exception being in case of a divorce or death. Not that I was planning to do either, but it kinda made it hard to try to not advertise our relationship everytime I came out the palace. Hence the glove that I only got to take out once I am back home. And now here, since I know none of you will speak about it.

That is how I married the father of my future little fawn."

Charlie chocked up a little, barely containing a few tears that escaped her eyes, and she got up the floor to go hug her, kissing the little snake too. Vaggie discretly cleaned up her eyes as well, ignoring the snore coming from a pass out Niffty. Not enough violence for her to be entertained.

Charlie declared the whole experience a resounding success. Alastor stand up to announce he would be going to his designated room now. Husk followed up his steps up the stairs until he heard a door closing after him.

Vaggie encommended Husk to take out Niffty to her own room so she could sleep properly, before taking out a still emotional Charlie to their room. The princess of hell wished everyone a good night and they responded in kind. As soon they were both out of earshot, the remaining three sinner gather.

"Bullshit" declared Husk. "Absolute fucking bullshit. Every single word of it. I fucking knew it. I remember the jazz club thing and he had the fucking ring on already. He knows I know it too. Lying piece of shit."

"Yeah, I was about to say, that also sounded weird to me" Angel crossed his lower arms, while the upper ones brushed his hair back. "That is weird, isn't it? Why lie about that?"

"To piss me off, obviously." As soon he said it, Husk just knew that it was true and glared to the door that Alastor had used. "He is literally just playing now. Oh, I bet that fucker is having just the biggest laugh at my expense."

"That wassn't a ssnake either" commented Sir Pentious suddenly, making the other two to stare at him. "Ssnakes aren't that physsically affectionate or even like continuous physsical contact like that. At mosst they tolerate it."

"Speaking from experience?" Angel arqued an eyebrow.

"Excusse you, but I am a man firsst! And for you information, no. I just read about it" clarified Pentious, so absolutely confident on his word that neither of them doubted that he was lying. Seemingly realizing that, he blushed. "I-in any casse, how are we going to decide who won the bet?"

At the other side of the door, Alastor couldn't help himself and let out a low chuckle. Lucifer could feel the vibrations through his entire scaly body.

"What is so funny?"

"Oh, nothing, my love. I was just thinking of an old joke that suddenly sprung to mind."

"Right." Lucifer already knew better than to believe that, but with Alastor frankly anything could be cause for his laughter. "Can I get my hat back? I feel naked without it."

"You are naked, darling." Nonetheless, Alastor did took out the little hat from his pocket and put it on the head of the snake over his shoulder.

"Yes, but now I feel better" Lucifer sighed, lowering his head to rest against the rest of his body, looking around the hallways as Alastor kept walking. "It's not as awful as I imagined."

"Did you strain a muscle reaching for that compliment?"

"Fine, it's disgusting. Has anyone ever told you that other colors beside red exist? Happy now?"

"Appreciate the honesty."

Lucifer rolled his eyes, reaching out to lay on top of Alastor's head between his antlers. He waited until they reached the room designated for Alastor before he jumped in the air, turning into his humanoid form with a red poof.

He smiled a little when seeing that the bed was just as big as their bed in the palace. They had agreed that he would try to spend one night there before making an "official" visit and deciding to stay with the rest of his family. That would be easier than opening up and closing portals from their home to the hotel.

"How are you doing, darling?" asked Alastor, sitting on the bed and patting the space at his side for Lucifer.

"For now it's fine" Lucifer leaned his head against his husband's shoulder and closed his eyes for a moment. He masticated the sorry that wanted to come out of his mouth. Saying sorry for being an anxious mess every time he was outside his palace didn't fix anything. "It's so much easier in animal form. I don't know why."

"I don't mind either way." commented Alastor, slipping a hand between them to rub his back in big circles. "Today you made our daughter happy just being here."

Lucifer smiled, hugging him by the side, holding Alastor by his shoulder.

"I still kinda feel bad we have to lie to her about… you know, that."

"It was your idea."

"Yeah, because I am not proud of it. Doesn't mean I have to like it" Lucifer sighed, letting himself fell to the bed, just dreading what kind of conversation that would be in front of their daughter. "Hey, sweetheart, that cute story we told you since you were born about your dad being a guard and we slowly falling in love was a total fiasco. Yeah, in reality what we actually did was the equivalent of marrying drunk in Las Vegas during a bender. So romantic, huh?"

"Technically speaking you were the drunk one, not me" pointed out Alastor with a chuckle, kissing his cheek as he lat on his side to brush his hair. "I was just minding my own business when suddenly I was teleported to the palace with a ring on my finger. Not even a dinner date."

"I know" groaned Lucifer, turning in the bed to faceplant the mattress. His voice came out muffled against the covers. "That was the most embarrassing shit ever."

"Mmm" Alastor nuzzled his nape, breathing in the scent of his hair for a moment, before he kissed again his neck. "I don't regret anything about how things went."

"Of course you wouldn't." Lucifer rolled his head to look at him. He didn't regret it either, truth be told. He just wished it could have been something to remember fondly, from the start to today, instead of a gradual shift that started on the worst feet possible. "Your story is still so much cooler."

"Considering most of it was improvised on the spot and then I had to remember the details for later, thank you." Alastor stand out to change clothing and bring something for Lucifer, since he really didn't have anything for himself.

In the end he gave him a plain white t-shirt that was still too big for his body and some gym pants that were also too long, almost completely covering his hooves, but at least could be adjusted on the hip so they wouldn't fall out.

"How would you tell it?" asked suddenly Lucifer when Alastor was about to turn the lights off.

"To Charlie?"

"Not necessarily. Just about in general."

Alastor tilted his head, furrowing his brow.

"Do you want me to tell you the story of how we met?"

Lucifer smiled, making the puppy eyes that so many times had condemned the both of them when coming from their daughter.

"Pretty please? You are seriously so good at it. Maybe it will sound less bad if it comes from you."

Alastor thought about it for a moment and then sighed. Flattery did go a long way with him, naturally Lucifer would know that already.

"Sure" said through a yawn, turning the light and getting into bed. Lucifer went to accomodate on his back, his white arms wrapping around his waist, as if refusing to lose their contact. "But tomorrow when we are at our own home, darling. I think that would be the best."

He was tired and wanted to sleep. But more than anything, he didn't want to risk Lucifer having an episode in the middle of it.

"If you need to go back to the palace at any moment, wake me up and tell me" Alastor turned his head all the way to kiss his forehead. Lucifer corresponded by hugging him just a bit closer, nuzzling his back.

"Okay. Love you."

"Love you too, dear."

[alpaca-clouds]

The Church in Castlevania

Okay, folks, I need to get this out of my system. Because this is always such a bad faith argument and... yeah, I just need to get that out there.

Now, I think most of us can agree that a lot of the game fans, who hate on the series, are just... looking for reasons to hate on it. Because in this time and age it is apparenting not just okay for people to say: "This wasn't for me" and move on. No, folks need to make up reasons why actually the thing they don't like is the worst thing ever.

In terms of Castlevania that comes with people idealizing the games (and quick reminder: I like most of the games, but... their storytelling is still very lackluster) and of course making up issues with that.

And one of the made-up hate reasons they found is how the church and religion are depicted.

They will claim: "Religion is a force of good and such an important part of the games and the Netflix series made religion a bad thing!"

And I am sorry. This is bullshit. Especially as someone who has been raised Catholic - aka the flavor of Christianity that Castlevania features.

Let me explain.

How the Games depict Catholicism

Now, I am no longer Catholic. Because of all the bullshit the Catholic church did to kids, and also their stand towards queer people. But I can tell you: If I still was Catholic, I would probably be offended at the games.

Look, this is how religious characters like priests and nuns look in the games.

And, I am sorry, this is all bad.

Now, let me start with Tera, because she is probably the least offensive in there. Because her dress per se is alright. That is what a habit of a nun would look like. Most probably St. Thomas or Ursuline. But... there is one glaring issue: She is not wearing a head scarf. And that is an important part of being a nun. Like, really. nuns are usually allowed to drop the rest of their habbit. If you live somewhere with an abby (or go to a school where nuns are the teachers like me) you might see nuns running around in normal clothing... But never without their headscarf. The hair has to be covered. It is kinda part of the point.

Next up would be Vincent. And that dress is just like... Okay, I am gonna give them some points for giving him the right hair style that would made him Capucian. But the rest of his design? What is even going on there? That is not Catholic, that is just some fantasy priest design. It absolutely makes no sense. Even less so under the entire "well, technically he should be a monk" idea. The design is bad. Really bad.

And then we have the nameless Priest of Moonlight Rhapsody. Who... looks like you crossed a Capucian monk with a freaking druid?! Like... What?!

Not to mention, of course, that while Sypha in the games is not technically a nun (though she hides as one) she hides as one and also is said to have a close tie to religion, being a woman of faith and all of that.

Now, the CV3 design is not even that offensive.

Like, sure, the blue is a bit weird, but... You know what? Hair is covered. The clothing is very conceiling. Yeah. It is not ideal from a Catholic point of view. So, that is okay.

But then we have the Castlevania Judgement design.

And... Do I really have to explain why this design is offensive on so many levels?

Like, you cannot just put a female character in this super sexy outfit, put so many fucking crosses on it and then go like: "Yay, religious character!"

Ironically the character who has the best religious design in the games is fucking Zead.

Outsie of that, let us look how religion gets depicted within the text... Well, no, let's not do that, because it isn't. Religion is not there in the text. At all. Because it is just a purely aesthetic thing that happens within the games. Charakters have religious affiliations, you will regularly find a chapelle in Dracula's castle with all the pretty stained glass and all that. But... It is not really there.

I think Alucard is a very good example of this. In Japanese artwork he gets depicted with a rosary or cruzifix from time to time. Like on the cover of Symphony of the Night.

But there is nothing religious about how he acts. There is no prayers. Nothing in terms of how he speaks. Really nothing. It is nothing but an aesthetic.

And... that is basically the whole thing going on with the games.

The thing folks miss, when it comes to the depiction of Christianity in the games, is that the games are first and foremost Japanese games made by Japanese games for a Japanese market. And in Japan only 1.5% of all people are Christian. And to Japanese people, Christianity is a very exotic. It is about as exotic as Shintoism is to European and American people. So, the Christianity within the games is very much that. It is basically the same like an American game in which some characters run around with Kitsune masks, or where you run through a shrine with nice torii in front.

Is it offensive in a horrible way? No. Or not that much, and be it just because Christians over here love to feel offended, but actually rarely are because they are the majority. It isn't that bad. But is it a good depiction? No, definitely not.

How Religion gets portrayed in the Castlevania series

So, let me talk about how the series - both the one from 2017 and now Nocturne portray Christianity and how this is related to their historical contexts. Now, let me first get one thing out of the way. The bishop and the Catholic church.

Yes, the bishop is clearly wearing the vestments of a Catholic bishop. Stylized, yes, but this is clearly Catholic vestments. And I have no heard several people claim that this is ahistoric because of Romania in general being mostly Eastern Orthodox.

But here is the big issue with that is, that... Yeah, Eastern Orthodoxy started to spread in Wallachia about a hundred years early. And it was from all we can say (look, there is little of written information that survived on the exact distribution). And I will not do it to you and myself to go deeper into the entire chasm between the Orthodox and the Catholic church.

Something that just needs to be said: The late 15th and the early 16th century in this area was a lot of religious turmoil. Which also had to do with the one historical detail that is not quite adressed in the show: Wallachia was just at the border to the Ottoman Empire, who tried to conquer Europe from there. (Again, the entire historical Vlad Tepes was so closely tied to that story. He got killed by the Ottomans in 1476.)

But that is also the aspect the show rightly brings in in one regard.

See, generally speaking one of the reasons that we got the Spanish Inquisition (which, again, was not about witches!) and the witch hunts just after the middle ages ended, so in the late 15th century was the conflict within the Church. There were suddenly several Christian religions and they were in conflict with each other and with that came a lot more push for the Churches to have power. The witch hunts were a way for them to clear up their power.

And yeah, that was a horrible thing they did. But... it is historically accurate. In fact, I would find it kinda offensive to look at the church of this time and show them as these nice people. Because that is kinda fucking with the pain and trauma of all those killed in the name of the church.

Now, Sala and his men are clearly Eastern Orthodox. While the clothing is not an exact match, the stuff they wear and also how they wear their hair and what not... That is Eastern Orthodox design.

Admittedly, the Priory is a but... bland for that. The Priory looks almost like Protestant. But than again it is a priory in a little town, so I guess it is somewhat understandable that it is not quite as fancy as Orthodox churches would be.

When it comes to the depiction of them... Well, I mean, they are not crazy because of their religion, they are crazy because somehow the night creature has brainwashed them.

That is honestly all I have to say.

And yeah, of course I should mention that we have of course Isaac there, who is a very religious character and who, in the very end, also gets depicted in a more positive light.

Now, compared to the original show Nocturne put in a TON MORE research when it comes to the depiction of the religious folks. Because while I do not consider the depiction in the original show as wrong, there is also not a ton of nuance and neither is there a lot of... details in there.

And compared to that we have now Nocturne and they just get the Knights Hospitaller so right. As well as their role within the revolution and all that. And... you know what? I am just gonna leave this blog here, where I went more into all of that.

But yeah, the entire thing is, that... in the games, Christianity is just an aesthetic. There is no substance to it. It is just to make the setting and the characters more exotic from a Japanese perspective. Meanwhile the show, which is mainly producted for a western audience, is more aware of the historical context it is set in and what role the Church took in it.

[idkwhatever580]

Agatha All Along Commentary

⚠️WARNING⚠️ AGATHA ALL ALONG 1x6 SPOILERS AHEAD

you’ve been warned

Im late again guys 😣 alright. Here goes nothing. I’m seriously considering taking my anxiety meds before these episodes because atp that might help.

Started watching at 3:00 pm

I stg I stg I stg I stg if this turns out bad I’m gonna throw up. And that says a lot considering I have emetophobia

Ooh fancy he’s Jewish

I’m not familiar with the Jewish religion but seems pretty cool.

Okay so we have established that this is Billy Kaplan which idk how y’all dug so deep to figure it out but I guess it was common knowledge and I do not have common knowledge so it adds up

Ooh now there’s a party funnn lol

I wish I had parents that were proud of me

Lmaooooo “you’re both disgusting” is so fucking real

4:25

ARIANA WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE???

She’s kinda hot guys. I have daddy issues but I’m a lesbian lmaoooo

5:14

WTFFFF I CANT DO THIS SHIT I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT IT MEANS BUT SHES TOTALLY LYING TO HIM IN THIS

5:42

wtf does the tower reversed mean bitch

6:14

Hearing her say baby is so fucking hot I’m gonna nut everywhere

Oh lord guys I seriously have problems… but don’t say you weren’t thinking it too 😏

6:51

WTF IS THAT THING A PROTECTION SPELL OR WHAT?!?!

DID SHE PLACE THE SIGIL?!?!

Omg if she placed the sigil on him that would be insane

7:46

If y’all out there with the theories about Billy maximoff’s soul taking over Billy kaplan’s body im kms because that’s so valid

——id like to let y’all know that I know nothing about the marvel comics and I do not intend on learning or digging that deep kk? I also don’t know what Wiccan is but I guess it’s Billy maximoff? Not looking for someone to explain it tho lol——

IM SCARED J DONT WANNA SEE MY BABY

NO WANDA NO WANDA I DIDNT NEED TO HEAR HER VOICE

8:34

Holy shit.

8:39

Watching it disappear is so sad. Like I know she’s hurting and saving the rest of them

9:00

OH MY GOD THE PARENTS STAYED ALIVE I THOUGHT YALL SAID THEY ALL DIED OR LIKE TWO DEATHS

9:33

NO FUCKING WAY THIS SHIT IS ACTUALLY TRUE

Y’all playing too hard

9:52

No fucking way. I’m actually so done right now. I’m so fucking done I need to scream at someone and it needs to be the fucking producer

10:15

That must be so fucking scary to go to “sleep” as Billy Maximoff and wake up in someone else’s body. Like in Disney shows when they switch and shit they have a moment where they look in the mirror and scream but this is def more realistic

Also I thought someone said there were two deaths. I don’t see no dead people up in this bitch

10:55

wtf is this?? inside out?

11:06

Noooohohohoooooo I forgot that Billy M can mind read and shit

12:33

That dog knows

Why is it always the dog that knows?

13:44

Having to call her mom must have sucked balls

15:22

Damn he already trying to fit the part bro. Moving on too damn fast

Him and his mom with the lying bro ✋🙄

Stop I sound like Agatha 😭

16:02

SHE DID PLACE THE SIGIL ON HIM WTFFFF

16:26

Okay I see you little emo gay kid having more piercings than me and having kissed more people than me and I’m older than you 🙄

17:26

Damn that’s crazy. He actually is telling this dude his shit

18:40

Damn that’s so fucking crazy his smile is creeping me out bro

Also I totally knew little Billy M was meant to be a little gay baby

19:24

Damnit all of these hoes have connection with him. Of some kind

19:57

You found a guy on Reddit. And you’re meeting him? That sounds like you’re getting killed.

OMG WHO IS IT TELL ME WHO IT IS

ITS RALPH NO ITS RALPH POOR RANDALL SORRY RANDALL ITS JUST WE KNOW YOU AS RALPH

21:06

Damn he went kinda crazy from being with Agatha all that time huh? That means the only one that can handle her is rioooooo

21:42

Don’t take my wife’s name in vain hoe

lol I’m kidding

I also apparently have multiple wives

Lmaoooo please ask about Agatha harkness

24:06

YOU FUCKING MURDERED SPARKY I WILL NEVER EVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS I DONT CARE IF SHE MADE YOU DO THAT SHIT I HATE YOU

24:19

Omg I can’t do this shit

Does this mean that Tommy is also in someone’s body?

25:27

I seriously do wanna know what kind of crazy that lady eats for breakfast. And I hope it’s me 😏

26:24

Yeaaaahhhh this song eats me up.

27:20

HOHOHOHHHHH THAT PICTURE IS THE IMAGE OF A FA- a gay woman. A gay witchy woman…. 👀

27:36

OH YEAH THEY BROUGHT MY GIRL DOLLY INTO IT

DOLLY PARTON FOR PRESIDENT 2024

Ahem… excuse my political views ✋😭

28:20

Omg omg omg he’s going on the road to find Tommy I’m gonna cryyyyy

29:43

Oh he’s so emo with his eyeliner and his black heart boyfriend and his belt chain and his witchy witchyness

…okay maybe im jealous

29:55

Ugh mommy. They’re both so hot. I know we only see Agatha in this part but I’ll nut to the thought of Aubrey Plaza

30:06

You’re seriously using a fucking house lamp you idiot ✋😭

30:29

You tell me to stop I’ll do it mommy

OH LAWD I HAVE ISSUES

I have to shit bro 😭

31:07

Hooligan is so fucking funny 😭

31:33

Guys I’m nutting everywhere from her sitting like that she’s soooo gayyyyyy

The producer really said “gay” and Kathryn Hahn said “yes”

32:16

I think if I was in that situation as teen, I’d say I want to. I want to poke that damn bear and see if she’ll throw me on the desk and- oh. Right right. Not the point ✋😭😏

I ALSO JUST REALIZED THAT SHE IS WEARING A SHIRT THAT IS RALPHS RANDALLS? Idk anymore bro

32:59

Wait… this is so fucking funny bro 😭😭😭

33:45

OMG SHES LIKE IN THE INTERROGATION TABLE AND ITS ACTUALLY HER HOUSE BRO

I NEVER MADE THAT CONNECTION 😭😭😭

34:21

HOT HOOOTTTTT SHES SO HOT RIPPING THAT TAPE IS SO HOT

34:28

THATS SO FUCKING FUNNY BRO

34:46

Hold on these side swipe things are going too fast I’m so lost. 😭 I hate having a horrible memory that makes me not be able to remember every single detail when we’re going back to something from a different pov

35:10

STFU SHE COULDNT HEAR EITHER TIME AND BOTH TIMES HE SAID SOMETHING DIFFERENT I WONDER WHAT HE SAID ON THE ROAD WITH THE OTHER WITCHES

35:19

YEEESSSSS IM SK GLAD WERE BACK TO THE ROAD

35:28

Yes! Pull yourself out of that mystery goop!!!

36:11

FUCK YOU BITCH FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU DONT BREAK THE SIGIL PIECE FUCK YOU

37:53

Wait. I am so gullible I like her being nice bro ✋😭

38:00

COVERED IN MYSTERIOUS ROAD GOOP OR NOT THAT POSE IS FUCKIGN HOT

38:09

I can’t tell if she’s crying because she’s happy the SIGIL is broken and she’s right or if she’s crying because she actually liked the kid

38:33

FUCK SHES BEING EVIL AGAIN I NEED A GOOD AGATHA AND I KNOW IM NOT GETTING THAT BUT A GIRL CAN DREAM

38:45

I’ll kill someone for you Agatha

39:05

Wait when she’s like don’t feel guilty about your talent I feel like she’s trying to be evil but it’s kind of endearing. Like. Shes so strong about it which means so many witches have felt guilty about their talents before and she doesn’t want that to hinder him. Even if she is evil that’s pretty sweet.

39:53

OH FUCK YOU BITCH KYS KYS HAHA THATS WHY YOU CANT USE YOUR POWERS BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO BE GOOD GOOD NOT DECENT GOOD

40:43

Stfu Agatha. Don’t mess with our bitch.

Robo papa? BAHAHAHAHAHAAA

she knowsssss

41:34

BAHAHAHHAAHAAAAA

42:02

“Got it” not her being serious for once ✋😭

42:25

DONT I KNOW IT BITCH YOU DIDNT HAVE TO TELL ME IM WATXHING YOU LITTLE MAXIMOFF BITCH

Post watching notes:

I seriously needed some Agathario shit and I didn’t get that and I’m mad. IM SO MAD THAT THE INTIMACY COORDINATOR WAS FOR TEO LITTLE BOYS I NEEDED MY MIDDLE AGE WOMEN TO MAKE TF OUT THEY ARE TEASING ME 😖😖😖

[thunderheadfred]

Im sick and crabby and don’t have a healthier outlet so I’m gonna a rant about a bunch of random shit okay? Cool

The world

Do I have to? It’s horrible. Every day it’s more horrible

Why is America like this

Why are all these powerful despots doing the shit they are doing

Why are literal children being exploded

Why is the earth on fire

Just stop

I think about Jesus a lot

Like a lot a lot

I’m not Christian but sometimes you just gotta think about Jesus

The fact that we gotta just like… do the day to day rigmarole despite the global panopticon broadcasting suffering directly into our consciousness, to the point that if you don’t take up volunteering or meditation or healthy religion or radical love you will in fact go insane

How do we fix it? Without becoming what we fight against

Jesus Jesus Jesus

Anyway. Breastfeeding

It’s ironic because I was so afraid of breastfeeding triggering body dysphoria. It’s triggered a lot of things, but not that

We have a bad latch, and I underproduce milk, probably because of my CFS

So whenever I try to breastfeed her, she ends up miserable and crying in a way you can only understand if you’ve been in this exact situation, and it feels like I am holding a knife and stabbing my own heart again and again

Because I can’t breast feed exclusively, we feed 50/50 formula and pumped breast milk, and she’s perfectly healthy and so so so happy, but I still feel like an axe murdering psychopath

These days I pretty much don’t directly breast feed her at all, and if you’d asked me before baby, I’d have thought that would be ideal. But no. I just feel guilt.

WHY DOES IT MAKE YOU SO SWEATY?? No one warned me about this, but apparently everyone gets postpartum sweats for like. months and months. it's so gross. I'm just moist. damp. wet. all the time. I thought I was going insane but no. it's just another one of those Pregnancy Things. thanks body

Child Free People vs. Pro Natalists

Why these new terminally online identity categories???

I didn’t get the idea of declaring myself “child free” before kids, even when I MYSELF thought I could never want kids

Calling children “parasites????” WTF unhinged

Calling childless people "psychopaths????" equally without hinge

Yes pregnancy is pure body horror but that doesn’t make it the BABY’S FAULT. A fetus is not some kind of malicious alien, it’s a human being in progress??? All human beings are consumers in nature but that doesn’t make us inherently evil, especially those of us who are the most tiny, ignorant, and vulnerable. A baby is just… trying to survive

Yes childbirth is transformative and awe-inspiring but why are a certain subset of rich imperialists so fucking gross about wanting to impregnate as many women as possible. Shut up until you can push the baby out yourself, then get back to me

Look. If you don’t want kids, don’t have kids? Don’t think about kids? Move on and solve world peace or something. Why is there a subreddit pathologically obsessed with hating children and shouting it loudly as part of their bio? I get that the world is full of horrors and it’s hard to imagine the future sometimes. “How could you bring children into the world” Yadda yadda. Climate change or WWIII or whatever existential threat appears tomorrow, every human being dies eventually. Death isn’t really an excuse to give up on the continuity of life writ large

but also? a declining population isn't the greatest threat humanity has ever faced, Elon you ketamine-addled incel shitface. It just means capitalism might break under the strain of the way we devalue and fail to care collectively for elders. even elders who currently HAVE children

You can just. Ignore children and live your life. Making it an identity reeks of insecurity, doubt, and a weird nihilistic doomed mindset

If the counterargument is “well parents make parenting their whole identity and that’s equally stupid and annoying” no it isn’t.

Unless we're talking about the equally deranged opposite end of the spectrum. Everyone is unhinged about kids these days, almost as if capitalism and individuation and the "nuclear family" have imploded the basic inter-generational human village that makes having children desirable and healthy for people on the whole

Having children is a huge amount of labor, never mind the emotional importance of family to uhhh most people? So yeah, it’ll be a huge focus for most. Whereas being childless is just. That. Focus on something else more interesting, since you don’t have to worry about kids. No need to make a thing of it. It seems counterintuitive. Don’t like kids? Stop thinking about them so much

For women especially, having an unnecessary hysterectomy or doing other damage to yourself seems so… self harm adjacent? You truly DONT know if you will change your mind (I did) but even more importantly, removing or altering your organs can have consequences on your hormones and quality of life. There are other forms of birth control that seem far less invasive and destructive. Your body your choice, always. But. These seem like unnecessarily harmful choices.

I’m not interested in confronting anyone about this trend which is why it is all behind a cowardly “read more” cut but I just find the whole aggressively child free identity mind boggling

Anyway back to thinking about childless MVP Jesus again

Jesus

Fuck. Did not expect having a baby to make me so conscious of Christ.

My unmedicated labor was a religious experience, so now I have to Deal With That

Still not Christian, but increasingly a fan of Buddy Christ

Christian nationalists need to get his name out of their mouths

Trump is the Antichrist. If not THE Antichrist, at least AN anti-Christian

How do we reprogram all these people who think they are heroic righteous saviors when they are about as violent and power seeking as it is possible to get

See “how to fix it without becoming the bad guy”? (Real Jesus had answers. Sorry MAGA, but most of them involve being forgiving, generous, vulnerable, introspective, or gentle)

They have so many guns

The idea that you could think Jesus is with you while you talk about rounding up migrants and killing criminals and hating your neighbor like. Jesus was very much not a fan of these things?? Jesus did not have an AK-47, he um. He rode a donkey.

Jesus liked to sit with kids under trees and wash feet and famously rejected power and wealth and kings and uhhhhh KINDA DIED ABOUT IT

LEAVE JESUS ALONE

I’m having a normal one, clearly

Here’s a happy baby

[itwasthereaminuteago]

|| From Out Of Nowhere ||

Part 2

Masterlist

A wild Foggy appears! And Frank finds himself sinking deeper into shit :D

The kid was a handful. Before the curfew was imposed, he had apparently always been showing up with new cuts and bruises, the nuns were concerned that he was being bullied, but he always just brushed them off with the same excuses; ‘just misjudged a doorway!’ or ‘I tripped on the stairs again’.

Frank knew very well what someone who had been in a fistfight looked like, and the combination of Matt's face and hands, and the subtly stiff way he moved was a prime example. However, Frank wasn't there to judge, he was there to do a job, and if that meant tracking this kid's every move then so be it. The main problem was how incredibly and insufferably annoying he was. Frank swore he had never met anyone who managed to grind his gears as much as Matt Murdock. 

 

“You gotta quit this sneakin’ out every night,” Frank had warned, “or whatever you're gettin' into is gonna land you into a world of shit one of these days.”

“I'm not ‘getting into‘ anything, Francis. Honestly, I'm just kinda clumsy. Comes with being blind, y'know?”

Frank snorts. “C’mon, you really think I'm buyin’ that crap excuse? You look like a goddamn poster boy for a fight club.”

Matt smirks. “At least my nose is still in one piece… I've heard about yours, what happened, let your guard down?”

Frank scrunches up said nose. “Used to be a boxer, so yeah, I know a thing or two about givin’ and takin’ a beating. Unlike you, kid.”

Matt's smile fades just for a fleeting moment, but reappears as he approaches Frank. “Well, maybe you could show me some moves, help me if I ever need to defend myself,” He suggests with a cocked eyebrow and flirty tone.

Frank is unphased and gives back as good as he gets. “Yeah, we wouldn't want that pretty little nose of yours to get hurt, would we?”

“Aw, you think I'm pretty, Castle?” Matt counters, sweeping his fingers through his hair in an exaggerated way.

“Fuck you, Red. Ain't you got some homework to do?”

Franklin Nelson, Matt Murdock’s best friend and self professed future ‘grande avocado’, risks a glance upward from the textbook that he's pretending to read, quickly averting his eyes again as Matt's hawk-like minder meets him with the stoniest glare from the desk a distance away.

 

“Is he gonna kill me? “Foggy worriedly asks under his breath. “He looks like he's gonna kill me, Matt…”  

Matt meanwhile, was concentrating on reading the day's headline news, running his fingertips over the ever changing braille reader attached to his laptop. 

“He's harmless Fog, just think of him as an oversized puppy, his bark is worse than his bite. Like I told you before, just ignore him. It pisses him off.”

Even more lines of concern appear on Foggy’s brow. “But I don't want to piss him off! Look at him, he's barely even a person, he's- a tank!”

Matt just chuckles, continuing to read.

“I uh, saw Kirsten last night.” He offers, changing the subject to try and calm his buddy down.

“Again?! Oh you dog Murdock, can't you leave some women for the rest of us averagely good looking people?”

“I don't know what you're talking about Fog, you're a handsome guy.”

Foggy snorts, “yeah and you of all people would know!”

Matt shrugs apologetically, “I have my sources…”

“Are you gonna tell her about-” Foggy raises the forefinger of each hand, wiggling them as he brings them briefly up to the top of his head as horns.

Matt shakes his head, lowering his voice even more. “No. The fewer people know the better. I can't risk anyone getting hurt, it's bad enough that you know.”

“My dude, remember you'd be in a lot more trouble if I hadn't found out…” Foggy then subtly tips his head towards Frank and whispers. “I'm surprised he hasn't figured it out yet, seeing as he's your constant shadow these days.”

Matt sighs. “Yeah, speaking of which, I need a favour…”

Frank looks up as he sees Matt approaching his seat.

“Can I get you another coffee?”

Frank is momentarily puzzled at how Matt could know he had just finished his cup. “How'd you know I was done?”

“God, you inhale it like it's air. Not hard to guess.”

Frank shrugs. “M’perfectly capable of gettin’ my own. Besides, you're here to study, so get studyin’.”

“Come on Castle, I'll be back before you can worry your big ugly head.”

Frank grumbles.

“I'm trying to apologise.” Matt continues, and this has Frank reeling. The kid never apologised for anything, especially not to him.

“Yeah? For what?”

Matt has his palms held out in front of him like he's really seeking Frank's forgiveness. “For all the shit you've got to put up with watching me, I feel bad. Let me at least buy you a coffee.”

Frank considers it for a minute and dismisses him. “Alright. None of that fancy shit. Just black, straight as it comes.”

“Just like you.” Matt fires in, quickly making his way to the cafe before Frank could fully process what he'd just said.

When Frank turns around he's confronted with the nervously smiling face of Franklin Nelson. 

“Hi!”

“What?” Frank asks, feeling his annoyance levels rising again.

“Nothing really, just thought that you're always around Matt but we've uh, never really talked much!”

“Don't see a need.” Frank grunts.

Foggy is undeterred by the brusque response, still attempting to get a conversation out Frank, which of course was harder than getting blood out of a stone.

“How did you end up in this line of work anyway? You know I had no idea there was much call for ‘minding’? Actually I guess I've never really considered it before now. Are you like, part of a bank of big burly guys that people can just order up for jobs like this? Do you get to pick what jobs to take or do you just have to go along with whoever you get? You know my mom and dad wanted me to take over the family business, it's a butcher's shop but-”

“Jesus christ, do you ever shu-” Frank looks snack towards the cafe stand. Matt is nowhere to be seen.

“Shit, where'd the hell he go?!” He gets up, quickly scanning the entire library floor for any sign.

“Oh don't worry, he's probably just gone to the little boy's room.”

In fact, that was true. Sort of.

Frank flew round the corner and down the corridor towards the restrooms, barrelling through the door and swiftly checking high and low finding every single stall empty. 

The window was open.

That goddamn little shit… Frank cursed internally as he pushed the window open wider and looked around, it was starting to get dark and he couldn't clock any movement at first, then there was a fleeting glimpse of a shadow on the rooftop opposite. He hurriedly climbed out and jumped the gap between the two buildings, still cursing as he ran after him. If Matt was ducking out to meet another girl on his watch, he was gonna kill him. He was probably going to kill him anyway whatever the reason. 

As he reached the end of the roof there was no-one around, it looked like the kid had given him the slip. Great.

Then there was a crash which sounded like a body being kicked against a dumpster in the alley, in fact, that's exactly what it was. Frank half climbed, half jumped down to where a black masked figure was getting a pummeling from two built looking hulks of men. It was the goddamn vigilante, the ‘Devil’ that he'd seen so much about in the papers recently.

When Frank landed one of the men turned at the noise and immediately made for him, lunging at him with a pretty decent sized knife. Frank sidestepped him, grabbed the guy's wrist and smacked the blade out of it with a sickening crunch as he broke the bones in the man's wrist. As he yelled out, the black masked man was able to kick out at the other attacker, twirling and roundhousing him to the side of the head. Frank's opponent still wouldn't back down, lumbering towards him trying to clothesline him with his outstretched unharmed arm. Frank quickly smacked him twice in quick succession with his fist and then his head for good measure, knocking him out just in time to view the conclusion of the other fight.

The black clad masked figure was almost balletic in his fighting style, if a little scrappy. He knocked the other goon out fairly quickly and then it was just him and Frank, facing each other a few paces apart in the alleyway.

Frank wasted no time, advancing, dodging the surprisingly swift punches thrown his way until he took a knee to the stomach with an oof , stumbling back slightly. The Devil made to run but Frank managed to grab him by the neck and throw him up against the wall, pinning him there as he struggled to break free, but Frank was just a little stronger and held him firm.

He used his free hand to pull the black mask from his face, he didn't know why he was even surprised with what he was seeing.

“Christ. So, these are the stairs you keep fallin’ down, huh?”

Matt grinned back at him, teeth stained red by blood from a cut lip. “You'd never have believed the truth.”

“That it's you, you're the Devil of Hell's Kitchen?” Frank shook his head in disbelief. “Of all the fuckin' people… what do you think you're doin’?”

“Protecting people, stopping a mugging for example? You wouldn't have noticed but neighbourhood crime rates have been rising…someone needs to-”

“How did you know those assholes were here?”

“The same way I know what you had for breakfast two days ago, and that you woke up from a nightmare this morning, and that you're heartbeat sounds like a machine gun from me telling you all this.”

Matt hears Frank's heart pick up at that and braces himself for a punch, but it doesn't come.

“How the hell are you doin’ that?” Frank growls.

“After I was blinded,” Matt gasps slightly to catch his breath as Frank still has his grip set around his throat, “all my other senses were sharpened, enhanced. I knew I could use them to help people, to fight the lowlife scum out there, do what the police can't.”

Frank shakes his head again. He was a goddamn magnet for shit he didn't need.

Matt tries to mute the groan of pain as Frank prods at the damp patch at the bottom of his ribs.

“You're good, but you ain't that good.”

Frank sighs deeply, deciding to let Matt go, already regretting what he's about to say. “Can you walk?”

Matt nods, clearing and rubbing at his throat. “Yeah, I'll be fine.”

“Alright. My place ain't far, gotta get you cleaned up. Can't have Lantom seein’ you like this.”

Matt cocks his head, surprised at Frank's offer but accepts his shoulder for support when he realises that he's completely serious. 

“I'm sorry about the coffee.”

“...Nelson know?” Frank asks as he's cleaning the knife wound and searching in his first aid box for the needle and suture thread. It's more of a statement than a question, and Matt nods. “Yeah.”

“All your girlfriends, what about them?”

Matt scoffs. “No.”

“They don't ask about the scars?”

“Nah, just think they're cool.”

Frank barks out a laugh.

“It's just Foggy. And now you.” Matt says.

Frank looks up from his stitching, his demeanor unreadable even for Matt.

“What are you going to do?” Matt asks tentatively, focussing on the steady rhythm of Frank's heartbeat as he knots and cuts the thread.

“Christ… I-” he scrubs his hand over his face.

“You can't stop me, what I do.” Matt interrupts, making his intentions crystal clear.

“Yeah, I guessed as much.” Frank sits back, wondering why he always seemed to get served the shittiest breaks in life. Who watches over the Devil? Him, he supposed.

“Well, if you're doin’ this we gotta get you somethin’ better than those fuckin’ black pyjamas...”

[sunflowerandstrawberryspice]

Cole my favorite human ninja! Finally after fiddling around I decided on my design for Cole, and idk if it's just me but I loved his longer hair style so I'm keeping it! Also I think it'd be interesting if Cole straightened his hair when he was younger. I know someone with textured hair who did ballet/dance for a while and he was either told to keep his hair super short or straighten it and gel it down so I thought it'd be an interesting thing to throw in for younger Cole's design since he was a dancer for a while.

So I will never get over how I wish they explored his backstory more in the show honestly I wish they explored most of the ninjas back stories more cause them kids had some pretty fucked up childhoods even before they became ninja (except for Jay he seemed like he was doing okay (?) he didn't know he was adopted yet and Ed and Edna have only ever been shown as really sweet so). Like Nya and Kai grew up with no parental figures, Lloyd went to Darkly's and then wound up on the streets for a while, Zane watched his father die and then got memory wiped, and Cole's a whole other mess.

Like His mother died when he was what like 5/6 years old (the Ninjago timeline is nonexistent) his father neglected him after her death leaving him to take on all chores and tasks in the house and the only way his father would only pay attention was if he was doing dance. Then he failed a extremely complex dance move as a child and in the episode The Royal Blacksmiths it seems as if his father liked to remind him of this, in that episode Cole also says that he's not a good dancer but we know that he got into the Marty Oppenheimer School for Performing Arts.

Now being a performing arts school that we can assume is a boarding school since Cole's father seems unfazed that he's not coming home, it's probably a pretty nice school. Not to mention boarding schools are private, hard to get into and sometimes even by invite only, this means Cole likely had to at least be talented enough to get INTO the school. Judging from how Cole's father talks to him (and the other ninja during practice) in the episode Royal Blacksmiths it wouldn't be to surprising if Cole only THOUGHT he was bad, I mean he successfully does the triple tiger sashay by the end of the episode after seemingly being out of practice for years, so I don't think it would be to far fetched to say that he was actually pretty good at dance.

As another fun fact apparently Cole may have taught Lloyd a bit of dance for agility/flexibility training which I think is really fun (it's mentioned in a book idk if it's cannon but it's fun to imagine it is!). Also I love the Royal Blacksmiths episode as a queer person cause it's literally a stereotypical coming out episode but like as a ninja and it never fails to make me laugh.

I think Cole's relationship with his father is really interesting because we see him I'd say the least out of all the Ninjago parents, like seriously I'm pretty sure we see more of Maya who was assumed dead for 6 1/2 seasons (that's probably 17-18 years in cannon) than we see of Lou. Now I'm pretty sure a good chunk of people I've seen talk about him are pretty split on whether or not he's a good or bad parent/if him and Cole are on good terms, in my opinion I don't really think he's a very good parent, we know for a fact he was neglectful while also putting a lot of pressure on Cole when he did dance, as for anything else we're really only able to infer and idk I just feel like he's not that great of a parent.

Now this is more my opinion just based off what we see of him, I don't think Cole and his father are all that close since unlike other parents such as Ray, Maya, Ed, Enda and even Misako we rarely if ever see him in the background congratulating the Ninja after a battle or helping them after a loss, in fact he actually just straight up doesn't go to Nya’s eulogy (which is in line with his character since it's been said he's not good with dealing with grief but it's still pretty shitty to do) I don't think Cole hates him or anything but I don't think that they're close or talk all to much even without the whole merge situation. 

Anyways I've spent way to long rambling about this but yeah, again this is just my opinion! I love love love this Lego show and Cole is one of my favorite characters and I'm glad in DR he's getting more attention, in fact a lot of the ninja are (minus Jay) while also allowing the new elemental masters develop which is just so fun to watch!

Hope y'all have a great day/night PEACE OUT!

[frazzledsoul]

So back when I was on the Gilmore Girls subreddit there was a lot of discussion about Liz Danes. A lot of people agreed that she fucked up Jess pretty badly by neglecting him and possibly enabling him to be abused by others, but some people claimed that her only flaw was that she couldn't hold down a job and smoked too much pot. The majority opinion seemed to be that the character that eventually showed up was ret-conned and was not the same character that was talked about in the early seasons and that the Liz we see is sunny, optimistic, and a generally likable person.

I do not agree with this. I think Liz comes off even worse once we get to know her, but that a family drama/rom com is perhaps not the best vehicle for that kind of character....or maybe it is, because it becomes apparent almost immediately how easily she is able to bulldoze over Luke's plans and intentions and manipulate him into doing what she wants. She also has no qualms in openly discussing her bad behavior: there seems to be no guilt, no shame, no repentance, no real attempts to make amends. She's going to do what she's going to do and everyone else is going to let her.

Before Liz actually shows up, all we know is that she shipped off Jess to Luke because she couldn't deal with him anymore and won't let him come home for Christmas: when Rory comes to visit him, he's hanging out in the park all day and not going to school. Apparently Liz is not exactly on top of his whereabouts, if she even bothered to re-register him in school (she probably didn't). The arrangement to move back to Stars Hollow is something that Jess initiates and appears to have little to do with her. Everything else is clued in by Jess's behavior: his inability to communicate or trust anyone, the secrets he keeps, his barely repressed anger, his lack of understanding (or respect for) the normal social patterns of a romantic relationship because nothing normal was ever modeled for him. The argument is that once we actually meet Liz, she is a far better person than she was implied to be and is not the same character.

The problem I have with all of that is that despite the fact that Liz is clean and sober, has a more reliable partner, and appears to be semi-employed the stuff she does and says just makes her out to be....even worse? She hasn't contacted Luke in months despite the fact that her son was living with him and left town, she immediately shows up and makes a beeline for the pot (even though she claims she has no use for it), it's made clear that she can't hold down a job and that Luke actively fears her husbands/boyfriends, and she....takes responsibility for nothing? Jess's problems have nothing to do with her, he's just an angry kid she can't control who won't forgive her long enough to come to her latest wedding and she takes no accountability for the reasons that he's angry. Nice.

It gets worse. She says her wedding to TJ is the first one she's attended where she's sober. She later says she's never made dinner for anyone, ever (how did this kid eat?) She doesn't attend Jess's open house and is never seen commenting on how he's improved himself, although Luke makes the effort to show up and introduce Jess to April. When she gets pregnant again, she openly admits to binge drinking while she was pregnant and seems to regard abstaining from this the second time as something of a trivial matter. Then we move on to the post ASP years, where she invites Luke to dinner despite not knowing how to turn on her oven and tries to pawn her newborn daughter off on him twice in the middle of his workday, which definitely leads one to wonder how Jess made it to adolescence given that she's doing this when she's past forty and supposedly sober and mature. Then in the AYITL years Jess and Luke are running around trying to disentangle her from a cult.

I think we can definitively say this woman's problems are a lot more complex than smoking too much pot.

The thing is that I understand this. I have a relative just like this. His son was sent to live with my family when I was young to help get him through high school and this effort failed, and he had some rough years before he got his life back together. It took my relative years and years to get better, and even at this point he's never taken responsibility for anything that he's done, the relationships he wrecked, the terrible examples he set for his kids, the damage done to everyone else in my family. Like Liz, he bowls everyone over with his affability and charm, and we mostly take him on his own terms. He can get better, but there won't be any accountability for what happened before, and we know not to expect it from him.

I think Jess's ability to forgive his mother is perhaps a storyline that's beyond ASP's capabilities, and it would have been difficult to pull off once Milo was no longer available in the way he was in the show's early years. Maybe it would have interfered with her desire to use Liz as a sounding board and a support system for Luke outside of Lorelai (but then again, if she hadn't messed up that relationship so much it wouldn't have mattered as much). Still, it's an interesting issue. How do you forgive someone who is incapable of saying they're sorry, partly because they don't even remember the bad things they've done? It's kind of something I'm still wrestling with IRL, and I don't know how to answer the question myself.

[lovebillyhargrove]

Slow burn. Season 1 Steve Harrington meets asshole Billy Hargrove. Fire on fire, leading to an explosion. First chapter of this whole idea where there are definitely gonna be casualties

On ao3 "Wake me up when July is around"

Chapter 1/?

***

Fuck this stupid fucking Hawkins. What in fucking hell has he done to deserve it? Who the fuck moves away from California to a shit hole like this??

No one, apparently, except for his dad.

There are a lot of things about Neil Hargrove he finds weird. But the strangest one? Neil never fucking cared about the ocean. Billy doesn't remember a single time when his dad actually went to the beach, with or without his son. How can you not go to the beach if it's right there, on your doorstep?

Fucking insane.

The only thing Neil has ever cared about is being a respectable member of the community. Don't stick your head up too high, or you might get it chopped off. Be like everyone else.

If that's what being an adult is, Billy would rather die young.

Fuck this shit. Fuck this lame town. Fuck his life.

His hands are itching to turn the ignition key and drive away without looking back right this fucking second, but Billy needs to finish school first. He also needs some money and to turn 18. He knows that, he's not a fool.

This year's gonna be such a drag.

His father is a mechanic, and a good one. They lived in the suburbs of San Diego, where his father worked for many years at the Marine Corps Air Station in Miramar. Billy isn't sure if he counted as military or not, maybe he was just a mechanic who worked on a military base on a contract. But it seems that they paid him a good amount of dough when he quit. Or when he was made redundant, his dad didn't bother to fill Billy in on the details.

Parents never tell their kids anything, they never fucking explain. Like kids are so dumb, they won't understand adult stuff anyways. But then they go and demand from children to be mature at the age of fucking four. Be a man, his dad always says. Billy has been listening to this phrase ever since he got out of diapers. He's pretty sure he heard it before as well, it just didn't register on his level of understanding. Be a man. Respect and responsibility alright, but, somehow, it's supposed to go only one way. Kids don't have to be respected.

What a bunch of crap.

We're moving, son, that's it. Whether you like it or not, whether you want it or not. Us adults make decisions, and you just have to swallow everything down, not have your own opinion, go pack your bag and help Susan. Put all the furniture in the van, come on, chop the fucking chop.

Billy remembers how his father took him to the Miramar base when he was little. Billy, of course, was impressed. Huge planes and helicopters, he'd even dreamt of becoming a pilot one day. He'd fly away, and find his mom, and they'd live on a deserted beach without the bad people.

As he grew older, he realized how naive and childish his dream was. He also understood quite quickly that he did not like anything connected with the army and the military. Always live by someone's orders? His whole fucking life, until retirement? No thank you, sir. He had enough of this coming from his dad. Billy was actually more interested in traveling to different places once he grew up, he craved the sense of freedom. Of going anywhere. Around the States, he's always wanted to drive to the Atlantic. Or Mexico, where, they say, the beaches are fucking brilliant. Or South America. The world is fucking huge, so why the hell not?

Not to Hawkins, Indiana, obviously, but here he is. Stuck in cow shit. Waiting for his stepsister to come out of the house so that he can drive them both to school.

Billy wasn't impressed with the military stuff, but he himself was good with his hands. Must've taken after his father. He enjoyed it too. Which was surprising because initially it was Neil who taught him a lot about mechanics. Very quickly, this father-and-son time has become a burden for Billy, a suffocating chore he didn't want to do anymore. Because it was constant pressure. It was constant dissatisfaction, even contempt. His dad was never happy, even about little things, like tightening a loose screw. It's not like that. You did it wrong there. You could have done a better job, do you hear me, son? The son himself could've turned out much better generally as well, Billy already got the basic idea.

Sorry, dad. For being the way I am.

Billy has been hanging out at this garage near his house since he was little. Learned a lot there too. When he was fourteen, he brought a crashed blue 1979 Chevrolet Camaro Z28, which he found at a junkyard, to that same repair shop. He remembered almost losing his mind when he saw that beauty, just standing there, waiting to be towed away for scrap, to be crushed, sent into non-existence. Irreparable damages. Fuck no. It was his car now. The guys at the garage were kinda taken away by the determination of a 14-year-old. They helped, a lot. Billy spent all his savings on that car, working on it practically every day for months. It was a lot of work, and Billy enjoyed every bit of it. He also tried applying for a driver's license at 14, claiming he had no other option of getting to school, of course it was such transparent bull, his application got rejected at first. He then begged Neil to help him. His dad did, used his military connections. At 15 and a half Billy was already behind the wheel of his super dope car.

As soon as Billy got his own car, Max was handed over to him, hanging like a concrete slab around his neck. Take her there and there, pick her up, wait for her. Be very careful when you drive. Do not ever exceed the speed limit. Personal chauffeur, damn it. No complaints allowed.

Billy put two and two together and figured out pretty quickly why his dad had been so eager to help with getting that license.

Max? She has always been the privileged one since the day she appeared in his life. Max became and still was his unwanted responsibility. He was doing fine, being an only child, and then one day, he got a fucking sister he never asked for.

His father married this colourless shadow of a woman, Susan, four years ago, and then, when Neil's job was over, they decided to move to the ass of the world, a nowhere town called Hawkins, cause Susan is from Indiana, and some of her relatives still live around here somewhere. Apparently, Susan had fallen in love a long time ago, moved to California, had this red-haired misunderstanding, then something had gone wrong, as with most marriages. But with Neil, it actually went right. Four years and counting, of this mind-numbing righteousness. The jury is still out on that though, but these two seem to fit together, both so boring and ceremonious, and with baggage in the form of children from previous relationships. It's hard to find a match with a kid hanging around your neck. Susan and Neil are trying. To build a fucking family.

So after Susan's brainwashing, Neil found some work here, in this joke of a town, on a farm or something, and off the whole family joyfully went.

Billy is taking a long drag of his Marlboro. It's a bit chilly this morning but, he must admit, it's not unpleasant. Although he already misses the sun like crazy.

Where the fuck is Max? They are fucking gonna be late for school on their first fucking day, for fuck's sake.

Billy suspected it wasn't that easy with Max's dad. Maybe she missed him. Maybe he was an asshole to Susan, just like his dad was to his mom. Divorce is never easy, and it hits kids the hardest. But Billy was jealous. Susan took Max with her. Unlike Billy's mom who bailed and left him with Neil. Why, Mom? Billy wasn't little anymore, he understood why.

But like a fucking toddler, he was jealous, of Max. His mother didn't want him.

They still don't know the whole truth about this idiotic move. Billy bets Max thinks it's because Neil wants his son to be as far from California as possible. It's stupid. His mom left without a trace, why resurface after so many years? That's not a threat. Billy's money on the opposite idea - Max's father could be involved in that shit. Maybe Susan wanted to tear all strings with that man.

Maybe not. Billy really doesn't give a flying fuck.

One year, that's it, then Billy can leave wherever his eyes take him. University on scholarship, very possible. Has to study hard, of course, and he can when he wants it... Maybe a gap year. Maybe just a job, in that same garage in San Diego, why not, really?

He just needs to fucking leave. He doesn't owe anyone shit. Well, we do owe, as his father always tells him. Life is full of responsibilities, that's real.

Mom left him. She didn't and doesn't owe anything to anyone. She probably had this in mind when she ran.

If Billy is really honest, it's all crap. We do owe, if we love someone. Or if someone is just close to you. He hates to agree with Neil, but sometimes he does.

Mom. Mom is his pain, and only his. No one cares about this, and no one needs to. No-one has to know. Everything is clear as the brightest daylight. Only this voiceless Susan wouldn't run away from Neil. Billy noticed that Susan's eyes are always cast down when Neil's at it with him. She avoids looking, like if she doesn't look, she doesn't have to deal with it, that's not her problem. She doesn't see the problem.

Maybe that's her secret. Cause living with Neil is truly unbearable. All brains will be thoroughly fucked by his dull moral teachings. With Billy's mom? It sure didn't work out. She tried though, for eight fucking years. It couldn't have worked out between Neil and her.

Billy remembers, Neil was so angry and jealous too. She must've found somebody else.

Billy understands it. It's just that, why have a child, a question for all of you responsible fucking adults? Was it really necessary to have him? They shouldn't have had him. What the fuck for? Only to quit? To abandon your kid? Leave him all alone in the house with Neil fucking Hargrove?

Yeah, Neil didn't quit on him. Thanks for that, I guess, Dad. I'd really appreciate it if you were less of an asshole, but that's probably on me. Uh-oh, the son turned out completely wrong.

Billy would, truly appreciate the fact that Neil hadn't abandoned him, if his father hadn't drained Billy's whole soul during all these years.

It was a fucking dick move to bring Billy into the world, like, no-one benefitted from it. Fucking useless.

Billy knows he won't have children. Well, maybe, but only in the distant, faraway future. Kids are actually cool, and Billy always pities them with his whole turned-out-not-the-way-we-wanted heart. Adults generally don't give a shit what the kids think or feel. They just use them, for... literally for anything. Own ambitions, exaggerated expectations, an outlet for frustration and aggression. Money. The sense of being in power. Dump it all on the kids, they are resilient. They'll adapt, everything is fine. They'll manage.

If Billy ever, ever, gets a little creature to raise, then he will definitely never leave them. Maybe he won't marry at all. If everything goes well, he might take a kid from an orphanage when he's like... 40 or something. He can be a single father, why not? Relationships are overrated. Marriage is overrated. Love is mostly bullshit, people fuck and have kids, then they run from their children like from the plague. Very few actually care about kids. In these seldom cases, the little motherfuckers have hit the jackpot.

Billy has always liked kids. Little ones, not the obnoxious teens like Max. The worst age, for fuck’s sake. No, the little kids who look at the world with wide open eyes and say the most honest shit there is. Still unbroken. Still happy, even if they've already seen that life's fucking unfair. Even if the world has shown them its ugly face, but they still somehow believe it.

Okay, what the fuck, enough with that cesspool of sadness, what's wrong with him. It's fucking pathetic.

It's probably just the first day in a new place, the nerves are acting up. Well, they've already been here a week, but it's the new school day, so.

He'll just have to hold out for a year here, fuck, it's only nine months basically, and then beat it, dust under the tires, miles away from his dad.

Dammit, is Max going to school today or not? Neil has already left for work, so there's no harm in showing a little disrespect. Billy honks the car horn couple of times, out of irritation.

Finally, Max rolls out of the house, thank fuck for that. Red-haired monster.

She jumps into the passenger's seat, like it wasn't on her.

"Mom was packing lunch!"

"Mom? Lunch? Well, hold on then, you dimwit. It's gonna be your fault."

Billy calmly drives away from the house to a safe distance and then floors the gas pedal, not without a tinge of pleasure. Makes the music louder, Scorpions are so good this fine morning. Let's fucking go.

He hears Max shrieking something like, "Billy, are you nuts?!? We're gonna crash!"

Same old, every goddamn time. Like Max really thinks Billy's gonna slow down if she's hollering like the chickenshit that she is. He's just gonna go faster.

"You should've packed your stupid lunch quicker. Now we're gonna be late because of you. And don't even think of ratting me out to the parents for speeding."

Max pouts and shuts up. She only clings to the safety belt, as if it would help her if they crashed for real. They won't. Billy knows his car like the back of his hand and he is an excellent driver. Driving and cars are two things that he's pretty good at.

Billy also likes basketball. Dribbling that ball, blood pumping, shoving other guys' sweaty lean bodies around the pitch, the euphoria of scoring.

And he has... well, had a great surfboard. Left it at a friend's place back in Cali, the fuck he was gonna do with a board in Hawkins, fucking Indiana. The friend promised not to use it too much but to take it out for a spin occasionally. He put in the garage, told Billy to come back for it. With god's help, Billy will surf on it again one day.

That's like his best friend, Nick. They've known each other for ages. Billy sometimes caught himself thinking that he would probably try something with Nick. Something like fooling around, in bed, that is. Billy thought about it a couple of times when they were stoned as fuck, sitting on the floor of Nick's bedroom. But Nick had a girlfriend since forever. Like real love and everything. And Billy respected that. Also like... Billy isn't stupid. There is no need to throw sex into the mix with good friendship. Now with the new school starting, everything will get going, he should call Nick, tell him how fucking lame it is here, ask how things are back in San Diego.

Billy wonders if they have some good weed here. There is a plastic bag at the bottom of his suitcase, under all his clothes. Nick gave it to him as a parting gift. Not to go completely off the rails with boredom here.

Drugs? Billy saw what drugs do to people. No, thanks. He smokes weed, but that's it. Well, he has tried molly a couple of times they went to big events with a crowd, but anyway, it's a fucking slippery slope, so no.

Alcohol, cigarettes, weed, sex when it's available. Driving his baby around which makes him feel alive. Working out. No surfing here obviously, but he's already signed up for the school basketball team.

Without all this maddening pressure from his dad and his heavy hand, Billy's life wouldn’t actually be so bad.

In California. Here it's gonna suck ass.

At the bottom of the suitcase there are also magazines, the latest issues. Not only the latest ones, but also those that he especially likes.

And if he has a couple of another kind of mags lying around under ordinary Playboys, then this is only his business. His father would kill him on the spot, no doubt about that, if he ever found out. But Neil didn't even welcome girls. Called them all whores anyways, like Billy wasn't even able to find anyone good.

First you need to get an education, son, decide on a job, and only then date a respectable girl, blah blah blah. Well, he's basically right about getting a job and stuff. Like...a relationship is at the bottom of Billy's priority list right now. Hell, it's not even on the list.

So Billy would bring a girl home only if he knew for sure that his father was not there and would not be for a long time. Billy couldn't even imagine what would happen if he brought a guy home. Ohh what a shitshow it would be. It'd definitely end up being a crime scene with the police and that yellow tape.

There is also Susan. And Max, the fucking snitch. Yeah, fuck it. At least masturbation to any kind of magazines won't bring him unwanted problems.

Also, if you do bring a girl home and they catch you, you'll end up answering all these annoying questions. What and who, what's her name and who are the parents... Who the fuck cares who her parents are. What were you doing there in your room, Billy? We were listening to music and holding hands, for fuck’s sake, Dad, leave me alone. Nope. Leave me alone - that's a very wrong thing to say to his father. Billy will immediately get smacked on the lips for such disrespect. Or worse.

Billy takes out another cigarette and lights up. Well, here's the new school. He drove so fast, they got here in under seven minutes. Of course, upon approaching the parking lot, he had to slow down, one of his most favourite songs blasting through the speakers.

Fucking hell, Billy still can't believe he ended up in this godforsaken swamp of a town. He misses his life back in Cali, he was doing so good there. It's gonna be a hell of a long year.

"Don't be late after school or you're skating home."

Max doesn't even say thank you for the ride, just bangs the door. What a spoiled little brat. Billy hates it when she does that, he hates that she gets away with it, she gets away with fucking everything. Next time she slams the door of his car, he's gonna teach her not to ever do it again.

He sets his boot on the ground. Heavy. Like his fucking heart.

Max is off to the middle school.

Billy is scanning the parking lot. Everything looks ordinary, everyone is busy with their own stuff. Most of the cars are the boring usual, but a couple catch his eye... That BMW over there looks interesting, apparently, someone got lucky with a rich daddy. That must be the rich kid, in a striped polo, bleh. He eats money for breakfast, it's so obvious. Staring at Billy like he's just seen Jesus descending from the clouds. What a dumb bitch. He must be the hottest one around here. Hairstyle and all that, a girl hanging on his arm. Surrounded by the court of jesters and such. Billy fucking hates rich kids. They are full of shit, rotten through and through.

Not far away, there are girls lined up in a row, assessing the new guy. There, in California, Billy was, of course, a 10 out of 10, but honestly lots of guys there were fit, tanned, with dazzling smiles and that special something about them. Like they are... carefree. Life by the ocean gives you this, like a gift. No matter how much it hurt sometimes, the ocean always, always helped. Healed him. It's 1779 miles away now. The Atlantic is closer. Billy craves water washing over his feet.

So yeah, Billy looks good. He knows it. However, if back in California Billy's looks are nothing special, here, oh here he'll be a fucking curiosity. He bets he'll get lots of girls drooling to get a piece of his hot ass.

They are already checking out his car. Well, sure he can have fun, it's the last year of school, after all. Just nothing serious. And, most importantly, no one gets pregnant. Double bag it.

Billy was already beginning to get the sense of dull annoyance, with girls. They just want to get the status of a girlfriend. Then plan their whole life, his too. He doesn't fucking need it. So who cares about a relationship. Sex with no feelings involved is always a good option though.

Billy smiles to himself as he sees the chicks twirling their hair. A couple of them don't look so bad either. The rest is meh.

He throws what's left of his cigarette and heads for his first class.

@dragonflylady77 a huge thank you for your help💖

***

Chapter 2

[redactahoe]

In celebration of the new guy audio here’s some honey and guy specific headcannons(tank is mentioned abunch though)

Tw:again hella unorganized, cussing, maybe some angst, mention of of abuse and neglect, fluff so fluffy it’ll rot your brain, i can’t spell or edit for shit

Srry for formatting issues, I’m writing this on mobile

Honey grew up in a shit home with tank as their older sibling and only care taker, their mother was incredibly sickly and wasn’t given proper medical care until honey, tank, and their dying mother ran away from Washington to daliha after somehow getting Gabe’s number and leaving a mysterious ass message to look out for a 14y/o(tank) and 9y/o with their half dead mom on sled in the middle of winter

Honey and tank grew up in a cult like environment with a small ‘settlement’ of people in the middle of bum fuck nowhere Washington, with honey and tank living the farthest in the woods. To far for them to talk to anyone other than each other and their parents

Honeys father was neglectful and possessive of their mother, so he would often hurt honey and tank(tank mostly) for taking their mothers attention away from their father

After they moved to daliha, instead of spending the holidays with the pack, they spent it in the hospital with their mama until she finally was able to leave when honey was 16 and tank was 19, but anyways this is how honey first met guy

Guys family (including himself)was and still is incredibly accident prone and got himself a trip the to the hospital cause his dad fell of the roof trying to put up Christmas lights, guy was bored in the waiting room while honey was two chairs away from him waiting for tank to fill out hospitals papers(idk wtf I’m talkin about) and guy decided there and then that they were the love of his life….. I’m kidding, they’re like 15 kinda

Guy struck a conversation with a reluctant honey but they end up hitting it off really well. Though all good things come to an end and honey had to go visit mama and thought that was the last time they would see that cute(tanker teases them endlessly for this one) guy….

That is until when school is back in session and they find out they have like 3 classes with him

Guy doesn’t find out why honey was at the hospital until years later and their pretty deep in their relationship that honey tells him

On less angsty note honey is a very large wolf shifter(slot like tank, it runs in the family apparently) with an affinity to healing magic

When guy is told/finds out about the whole magic thing he is elated at the idea that honey can get even cuddlier and give him magic boo boo kisses(they vehemently deny the notion)

When guy met the pack David,Milo,asher, and tank gave him the some shovel talk put in their own ways. Guy was scared shitless but honey ended up defending their lovable idiot

At said pack meeting guy and angel have a spider man meme moment and david and angel shared the same “oh god there’s two of them now”. Lovingly though

Guy know how to cook two things and two things exclusively, and that’s pizza (obviously) and box Mac n cheese but honey is the chef in the relationship.

Honey is mixed Romanian and spanish and use to spend a lot time in kitchen with mama and tank so honey knows how to cook

Honey works out a lot as an outlet for all the trauma and anger issues so their pretty beefy and guy fuckin loves it

Guy is almost always the little spoon but whenever honey is having a bad day or feels like it they’ll let him be the big spoon

Honey is secretly super cuddly but only with the people they trust

Guy is scrawny af

Guy can’t take much seriously but the first time honey had a bad day while they were just roommates, it was the first time guy got seriously with honey, he was so gentle though.

[blindrapture]

SUNDAY JULY 24TH, 2011 (Sanctuary Francisco)

8:42 AM groggy. "You're awake. Good." hi Donnie. :) "Hi. Wow, you really are quick with that thing." what? oh, the journal. I've been doing it for two months now. Kinda got a good system going. "Cody wonders if it's a good idea." Does he, now? "I told him it's part of the package. I think it helps you stay aware in the rabbit holes." Part of the package. So you guys have been talking about me. "He's... ugh. He's so paranoid. I think I dodged a bullet with him." What else is he saying? "He doesn't like new people. He says he's alright with me, because he 'knows' me. But he doesn't know what to think about you. I think you should talk to him today. Spend time with him." I mean. I can... but how long are we planning on staying here? I want to search for Bones. "Well, help him out, maybe he can help you in return. I want to stay here for a little longer." Heaven has that plan, doesn't she? Apparently we'll be hearing about it in a few days. We could stay to find out what it is, at least. "A few days? Sure. That works." Okay. You going out? "I'm going to have a look around the area, now that it's daytime. You go find Cody, okay?" kiss "Love you." I love you too. :D

9:50 AM ...FUCK I FELL BACK ASLEEP okay okay, I'm getting dressed. Hat, coat, scarf, pants, velcro shoes. San Fran, here we go, baby!!!

9:51 AM Tiger's here. Cody's eating cereal. Morning! tiger waved. What's. What's going on? "Winston's missing. I came around to get a search going." cody "I'm on it. Gotta eat first." Can I come?

10:03 AM Walking in a pack!!! cody "Do you really expect to do much with a piece of plastic?" tiger "Oh, you should have seen him last night. He took a zombie's head clean with it. It was swag." You can doubt Tiger Stripes all you want, but this thing came from the sky. It's built to last. cody "The sky?" Yeah, on the first day of all this. I took my guitar controller out and lost it pretty quickly, and then that night, this thing fell from the sky. "Sounds like a lot of horseshit to me." Have you. Have you seen what's happening? "I've seen plenty enough. The walking dead. A dog that takes people's skin. Moving shadows. Those damned sirens…" Sirens? "They looked like speakers on legs, but they were tall enough to be tripods from Mars." "Like in that movie." "I saw them towering over Lincoln before I made the decision to come to California." That sounds like Legsteps. You saw them in... Lincoln? "Nebraska." On Earth. Huh. "You've never seen them on Earth?" Only ever in Xanadu. The, uh, the other world. "Oh yeah. Donnie tells me you guys have spent a lot of time over there." Is that weird? "...a lot about you is weird, kid. That one maybe more than most." But. But it's another world, accessible just by walking through a door. What's not to be curious about? "It's a danger. Bad things are coming out of there. We don't know how it works. We don't know for sure how to come back out." They're. They're doors. You just.. walk back out. "Do you ever wonder if maybe you got lost in there long ago, and this thing that's come back out isn't even you?" Well, then I'd be the one talking to you right now, so, no, I wouldn't really wonder about that. tiger "I like him, Cody. He's seen things." cody "We're not here to like people. We're here to stay alive." looking at me. "If you can protect people and keep them alive, then you're alright." But you're still unsure? "I think being unsure is the right move in all this." Alright, I can respect that.

10:07 AM Met up with Jackie, Tiger's friend. She's helping look for Winston. She says he was last seen in John McLaren park. That's where we're going now.

10:25 AM At the park. Cody's putting a backpack on the ground. Looking at the rest of us. "Alright, McLaren's not a small place, so we're going to need to split up, cover more ground. I'm pretty sure Jordan is the second-oldest, so he and I can take separate groups. Jackie, Tiger, you.. pick who you're going with. Jordan, you go north" pointing "and loop around the paths up there. It'll take you some time, but I'm giving you the easier task, as you're new here. I'll go south, where most of the land is off the trail. I'll head to the soccer fields first, then cut back and hit Visitacion, then head back here to meet up. I put that at about... 2, 2:30. Understood?" Understood! "I'm actually glad you wrote this one down. Alright, if you find Winston, or if you run into some serious trouble, I want you to send a signal. Why don't you... hit that guitar of yours against something metal? Hit it as hard as you can, and keep hitting it; hit it to a pattern. Meanwhile, if I run into anything…" pulled out a pistol. "..I think you'll know."

10:27 AM Tiger's with me. Jackie's gone with Cody. Tiger, can you lead the way? "Yeah, no problem! Just keep your eyes peeled, okay?"

10:44 AM Been walking at a somewhat slow pace, shouting for Winston. "I hope he's okay. He and I went to the same school, y'know. I did everything with him." Do we have reason to believe he's not okay? o: "Well. He's been saying some things lately. I think he was already not okay." What kinds of things? "That the Fears are talking to him in his sleep… That I should just let him die." ...ah. Yeah, that's cause for concern. .........does he ever specify which Fears? "I don't like to listen to it when he talks about that kind of thing, but.. I think he said there were two different voices." I like to think I know at least a little bit about some Fears by now, is all. So if there's a Fear I recognize, then I'll have an idea of what to do, or not to do. "There was a. There was a Ruin. God, I hated when he went on about the Ruin. It wasn't his friend. It wanted him to stop trying. It wanted him to grow up with it. Grow up and get used to the cold…" The cold. Was this a little boy? "It's not a little boy, it's a monster." No, I mean. "I know what you mean. It.. looks like a little boy. Yeah." I've.. run into it before. I've never tried to do anything with it, but. Well. I can try, can't I? I'm the White Jester. All I can do is try.

11:16 AM God, these trails are thick with foliage. 'Cause it's a... it's a park. Not a big wide open play-sports-on-a-hill park, but winding trails and sprawling trees and tall shrubbery. Like. Like Marble Hornets. "Yeah, I don't actually know why Cody sent you this way. It'd be way easier to search the south side. That part has fewer trails because it's so much more open." ....what. Were we duped? "By.. Cody? No, he knows what he's doing." But Winston could be in any of this tall grass. There's no way we can search it all. "We still have to try. If Winston's alive, he'll hear us. Searching through all the grass is only if he's...…" ...right. Yeah, that's.. that's right. Sorry. "It's okay. You're new here. And you're helping."

[if you want this string of binary, you'll have to get it from the Website, as it's too big]

11:54444444444444444444444 "Why won't you just play with me? You never wanted to play with me." and there he is. skin blue as laura palmer, hair black as ice, eyes open and black too. red and yellow striped shirt, he looks like he belongs in a time that never was, except for in our fiction. and today he wears a red glove on his right hand that is too big for him. he's the cold boy, and he's called the Ruin. "No matter where I find you, you're always the exact same. You're no fun." I'm inoculated. "You're antisocial." You prey on the social. "What do you know about it? You're not supposed to know anything." In my loneliness, I write. It makes me feel not so lonely.

(Attached: "The Ruin is a sad one. He was always aware of the red glove. And no one was around to stop him from listening to it. But how could anyone be? He was always alone. He thrives when alone. That red glove is the thing that makes these early Ruin passages so strange. That red glove doesn't talk to us. It talks to... you. And that red glove is playing a long game.")

11:56 AM We found Winston. He's sitting on a park bench. He looks completely spaced-out.

12:24 PM Okay, we've been waiting here at the center of the park for a while now. I banged my guitar, we shouted for Cody and Jackie, and he's not showing up. Are we gonna have to wait for 2:00?

12:25 PM At least Winston has been talking. He's been seeing the Ruin for years, he'd play with him during his lonely childhood. High school has been better for Winston, so for a while the Ruin had gone away. Then the Rapture started. And Winston started hearing voices in his room at night, when he'd try to sleep. Not every night, but usually when he was sleeping alone. One voice was the Ruin, urging him to leave his shelter and come and enjoy the apocalypse. The other voice is a name I don't recognize, Grendel, just saying "Let me in. Let me in." The Ruin said not to listen to Grendel, that Grendel would "take your face." Evidently, today Winston did go with the Ruin. They had been playing in the park, waiting for Thursday. Because something's gonna happen on Thursday. And Winston says I came and talked to the Ruin? And that's what caused him to let Winston go. I don't.. remember that. But my journal has a new passage in it, just like last time I felt really cold. There was no lost time this time, though? ...questions for later. For now: WHERE ARE YOU CODY????

1:10 PM There he is. With Donnie! o: "Hi, Jordan!" Hi, Donnie! :D "Hi! I was on my way into the park and I found him. He says you guys are searching for someone?" We found him! Winston's right here. cody "Oh, good job! You are a help." ..where's Jackie? cody "Jackie was getting sick, so I sent her home." ..tiger and winston are a little confused, but they'll go and see her when we get back. Tiger's telling Cody that I dealt with a Fear. He sounds dubious, but he's holding that back. Donnie, though, Donnie's beaming. :3 That's what I do it for.

1:14 PM Cody's putting his backpack back on, slipping the gun back in. "Well, now that Winston's safe, I've gotta go. Got secret work to do." tiger "Ah, your big secret project with Heaven!" cody winked at him. "Are you and Jordan gonna stick around until Wednesday?" donnie "I think we can make the time for that." Wednesday. Huh. Uh, yeah! We'll make time for it. Good luck! "See you guys." … Well! What are we doing now?

1:18 PM Tiger's taking us to a restaurant. He's treating us. Hi Donnie. :) "Hi! So, you scared off a Fear?" I don't actually remember it happening, and my journal... doesn't really answer anything. But it was the Ruin. That.. coldness we felt, back in St. Louis? "Ooh, that. Look at you, saving people!" >w< What did you get up to? "Well, I met some of our neighbors. They're really nice. They're really glad the RAF moved in; monster attacks have gotten rare. And plus the blue sky is a great touch. I did actually go looking around to try and look at the Ants of the Sky, but they're.. really high up. They don't come close enough to the ground to give me a chance." Do you think we should be wary about that? Something up above, changing the sky? "Until we actually see them for ourselves, we're just going on speculation, aren't we?"

1:33 PM Here we are! Restaurant! The Bold Lioness. Yeah, that sounds like California. Sounds really indie. It's packed full of people. It's.. nice to see. It does feel normal.

1:35 PM Got a table. Jeez, look at these prices. Yep, this is California… "Don't worry about it, I've got money." Thanks, Tiger. :) ...these prices. donnie "Yeah, you said, they're high." No, not that. These aren't dollars. This is... Z? "We've.. seen that before." donnie's tensing up. In Xanadu. Yeah. Uh. Tiger? Where do you get your money? "I steal it." says with a mischievous smile. "The RAF believes in sharing the wealth; we're against the rich, after all. And the few times I've been caught, people didn't even care. I don't think people want money so much anymore." No one except, evidently, the restaurants. Huh.

1:47 PM Well, I can't say no to a good burger.

3:23 PM We passed a lot of zombies on the way home, and I got to observe much closer their docility. We also saw a big black dog-- I think the black dog, the Fear, what was it called?-- but we just.. avoided that street. At one point I saw a patch of red bleed through the blue sky above, and a fluttering of black dots made it blue again. Yeah... can't say I get the best vibes. Isn't the blue sky just.. making people forget?

5:08 PM We dropped off Winston and Tiger at the, uh, Party House, then Donnie and I scooted on back to our cots... <3 But I think tonight I want to get started on why I came here in the first place. I'm gonna go asking around about Derek.

5:32 PM Well, going door to door was way too slow, so I came over to the Party House. There's a lot of people staying here, and I don't know if many of them are permanent residents, I think mostly this is just a gathering-place for young people. And that's perfect. I can spread the word of who I'm looking for.

5:39 PM Yeah, uh. His name's Derek Taylor, might also respond to 'Bones.' I guess I don't know for sure what he's wearing, but I wanna say he dresses a little like me? Coat, hat. We were like the Blues Brothers. ..dark hair, last I saw he has a mustache. And this is kinda important, because he's been leaving graffiti calling for me to meet him. "Oh, is that what JORDAN IN THE TRILBY HAT means? I thought it was a song!"

5:42 PM The kids are alright. c: They'll spread the word, as I hoped. ..and I guess, as long as I'm here, I'd may as well hang out some more. C'mon Donnie! They're playing fun music today! We can dance! :D

5:49 PM wheeeeere did all the looooove go I don't know, I don't know

6:30 PM Donnie's gone home. It has been a longer day for her than for me. .w. C'mon, play Free Bird! Do Stonehenge!

7:13 PM Gone to the gamer corner. Nice and chill here. Mood lighting. Everyone's got their PSPs and their DSes and their... is that a Game Gear? "Atari Lynx." It's a what? I didn't even know that was a thing. "It was my uncle's, before all this started."

7:14 PM Tiger? You.. you okay? "Jackie never got home." Fuck. Okay. Do you want to go look for her? Is there anywhere else she'd have gone? "No... she lived here with me. This was our home. She was my sister." Shit. Okay. It's okay. Then she'll still be in the park, or on the route between there and here. It's okay, let's go look for her.

7:16 PM A whole crowd of kids are coming. When the party house owner needs help, everyone listens. This is good. With a group this size, we'll find her.

7:39 PM The park. Sun's going down. But some people have flashlights.

7:40 PM "Listen, Jordan." Yeah? "Cody said he was going to the soccer fields and then to Visitacion. He meant the middle school, it's just on the edge of the park. It's where Jackie went to school, before this summer. And I'm wondering if she found her way inside for some reason. So I want to check that place out. Will you come with me?" Absolutely. o:

8:05 PM Found an open window. It's just the two of us as everyone else sweeps the park. Tiger's got a flashlight. Window leads into a classroom. Should be able to get to the hallways. Break down doors if we have to.

8:07 PM These doors are unlocked. "JACKIE? JACKIE, ARE YOU HERE?"

8:10 PM Darkness. Empty classrooms, everywhere. Not even any cryptic messages written on chalkboards. Can't hear a thing, no footsteps, no growling, no clear threat. Do you know what classrooms she had? "Yeah, we're heading there. I really don't know why she'd have gone here, but, like. Maybe she just needed to reminisce." I'd have done the same. Probably. Or maybe she had some.. notes... written down.... that she left here, and.. forgot??? "Maybe! God, JACKIE? WHERE ARE YOU?"

8:13 PM "TIGER! YOU IN HERE?" that's one of the other kids from outside. "YEAH?" "TIGER, WE FOUND SOMETHING! WE FOUND HER BACKPACK!" "Oh man. OKAY, I'M ON MY WAY!" tiger's running back. but. it's strange. there's a faint light in this classroom. the one tiger was taking us to. I'm gonna peek.

8:14 PM ...it's Jackie. Lying on the floor, next to a candle that's nearly burned out. She has a bullet hole in her forehead. ...… sigghhhhhhhh.

8:20 PM We got out of the school. Her backpack was caught in some tree branches a little distance from the school. It had some fidget toys in it and an iPod, cushioned in colorful cloth. Tiger's sure she won't have gotten far. I.. don't... want to.. tell him. What would I say? How would I break that to him? Even if I just told him that she's dead, he'd want to go and see. And how would he take... that? ...I mean, who else could it have been? So. I might just... look into it myself. Maybe I should tell him. Maybe...

8:55 PM Home. In bed. Heaven's making some dinner for us all. I'll eat that and then sleep. I… Why do I get the feeling I'm on my own for this one.

(Attached: “If the Omen could write, I bet it’d write the most beautiful thing in the world. Originally so affixed with Hertelap so as to be one and the same, when Hertelap committed his atrocity and brought about the extermination of an entire people all over the morbid roots of vanity itself, a part of him broke free of his body and became the silent god we know today. Over the many years, Hertelap ceased to be and all we were left with were a few figures who we’ll meet eventually. Before we get to any of that, though, let’s end this episode of History Dubious and just shut up about the whole thing.”)

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[yousei-no-mori]

Ijiranaide, Nagatoro-san - Rant

I am currently watching season 2 and I have some thoughts (about both seasons).

First of all why did I start watching this anime? Erm... So I know what the target audience is, it's people who self insert as Naoto and want to date Nagatoro. As for me? Oh, it's the other way around. I think Naoto is cute and I want to bully him. I thought maybe my female friends were similar but the only friend I have who read the manga wants to make out with Nagatoro. Sorry, I forgot lesbians exist.

Uh, anyway yeah Naoto is cute and I want to be Nagatoro. Not sure if girls like me watching this was intended since these anime are usually made for lonely dudes, lol. Anyone else feel like me though?

The scrunkly.

Okay, so, my thoughts on season 1... Lemme check the episodes to bring back my memory a little bit, as I watched that to calm down from the stress that is social work during last Winter.

The first two episodes made me really scared to watch this series, for real. Nagatoro just straight up mentally tortured Naoto, and not in the hot way. I felt really bad for him because I know what it's like to be the shy nerd kid. Anyways at around episode 3, I think, Nagatoro starts showing her softer side more. And she hardcore crushes on Naoto.

The dynamic between Nagatoro and Naoto is really cute in my opinion, even if it is very simple. Nagatoro has her first crush because she finally found a guy that doesn't bore her to death but she doesn't know how to handle it so she bullies the fuck out of him. Naoto is pretty much the opposite? He doesn't really realize how much he likes Nagatoro sometimes and thinks he would rather not be around her. He tries to manage that by fighting her off in which classic anime romcom things happen. You know the "Holy crap you did something on accident, PERVERT!" thing, except it sometimes works really well. Maybe it's just because I think both of them are really cute, but I like when they have their little "Oh god, we both fucked up" moments.

Then there's the more obvious romance aspects and they're by far my favorite. The momens of honesty and the cute glances... Yep, they're adorable. I don't want to give away too much, sorry. Just know it's, in my opinion, the best thing in the series.

I don't care for the side characters by the way, but they can be enertaining when they point out how obviously both of our main characters are trying to "prove" that they don't like each other. They're the audience, the "just kiss already!" guys.

Also funny face cute. I like when she snaps. I like her. The cutesy. Okay no, for real, I love when Naoto and Nagatoro support or protect each other when they really need it. They can be a bitshitty towards each other sometimes but in the end they're actually kinda... healthy? Like Nagatoro is creepy but I love when the girl is a creep instad of the guy, since Naoto is actively watching out not to disturb Nagatoro. And how she will constantly accuse him of being a creep makes sense later when you realize that she's actually much worse than him, lol.

Okay let's get to season 2, since I keep using too many screencaps of that season anyway.

Oh boy, another anime studio took over with season 2 (now OLM, before it was Telecom) and it's very noticeable. The animation is stiff and sometimes just straight up doesn't move right, the art is a lot more bland, in season 1 there were a lot of beautiful warm colors and lineart, and the voice direction is very strange... That and also our main characters seem to regress a bit? Now being overly flustered over small things that they would've been fine with in season 1? I get it, they're supposed to be cute and awkward but it's the classic romcom regression...

I'm in the middle of watching season 2 and sadly the things I loved in season 1 just aren't that apparent anymore. It's still cute and I love Naoto and Nagatoro together, but I can hardly pay attention to that when Naoto is animated like Chargeman Ken.

^ little appreciation for the beautiful lighting in season 1!?

Anyway, Ijiranaide, Nagatoro-san will forever be my biggest guilty-pleasure comfort anime and I'm only a little ashamed.

Love ya

[ohsalome]

Also, didn't want this in my last ask cause I think it would have been too convoluted but... how to condense this thought?

So I watch a Ukrainian man's coverage of this war, Denys Davydov on youtube, I think he does a very good job of things

When he was covering the russians fleeing mobilization he pointed to that guy who was trying to get into Georgia but had a big Z on his windshield so they didn't let him in and so the russian was complaining

And what Denys said was more or less, "See, a lot of people fleeing russia right now aren't doing it because they don't like the war, they're doing it because they don't want to be mobilized. When they go to these other countries they might remember to scrub the Z off their car, but they still have the Z in their minds. That's why it's not smart to let them in to other countries, they haven't changed any of their opinions, they just don't want to be effected"

I thought yeah, he's pretty much nailing it on the head, and he's pointing out the problem so many westerners were missing when it came to mobilization

They'd be like "well it's less troops they can send" or... you know, all that stuff; and it was just like no... these people are going and harassing people in the countries they're going into, they're still supporting the war

I just feel like a lot of these people really don't get the situation but still feel free to run their mouths over things

Like, and this is my perspective as and American and I'm not saying I'm right and totally don't mind people disagreeing with me, but you show me an actual anti war russian... fine, let's help them out

So many of these russians though, they're not anti war, they're anti losing. They're anti it effecting them. It's clear people being like "oh the poor russians" about people who... you listen to what they're saying and it's like... why on earth am I supposed to be sympathetic

Yeah, I'm sorry that russian soldiers are dying, like in a general sense that death is bad, but I kind of don't have a choice but to be happy every time one of them dies cause that's one less murderer

You want to save russian lives? Support Ukraine, support moves that weaken the kremlin, force russia to end the war. That's how you save russian lives

Like yeah, I have an American's perspective on this. I don't have an Eastern European's perspective... but at least I listen. At least I hear what's being said, think about it, and am able to go... yeah, I get why Eastern Europeans feel like they do about russia. I get the anger after the generations of genocide and the active genocide and like... maybe I can shut the hell up and leave it

Then I see opinions from people, not even the hard core far right or tankie opinions, but stuff where it's like "oh the poor russians" and it's just like man... you're not paying attention at all

I don't know... I really don't, and it's not like my opinion is even super important. Just kind of... as an American I see American opinions and it's way too often I'm going fucks sake, y'all aren't paying any damn attention

Thanks for the support

I think you raise a very good point when you mention "not paying attention". If people don't follow the events of the war, they end up relying on their own assumptions about how world works... Which apparently is like a kindergarten level of telling two kids who had a fight to apologize to each other.

Is it laziness? Is it lack of empathy? Is it russian propaganda? Frankly, as far as outcome is the same, it makes no difference to me.

I will also be leaving a link to the channell you mentioned