#apparently lucius malfoy is in the games a lot like LEAVE ME OUT OF THIS!!

[xoxothesubwayfugitive]

idk if anyone here ever reads the Harry Potter fandom wiki but goddamn I wish there was a "no mobile game lore" button you could click

[hpimaginesandblurbs]

Lucius Malfoy being a fucking bastard who doesn't care about manners, just ruining the reader. If you can include kinks like reproduction, suffocation and sexual slavery.

pairing: lucius malfoy x reader

word count: 1.5k

warning(s): 18+, dom/sub roles, master!lucius, choking, breeding kink, mentions of pregnancy/impregnation, soft!lucius at the end

a/n: sorry this took literally forever, a lot has been going on but i think i'll be back for a bit. if you left me a request, please be patient! also, lucius is a little softer in this towards the end than you probably wanted but i couldn't not do it...i love soft!lucius.

“Look at my little pet, all spread out and desperate for me,” Lucius mused, his silver eyes tracing over every inch of your exposed body.

“Yes, Master,” you replied dutifully, praying he would give you what you were desperately waiting for.

You had been waiting, sprawled out on his desk, for the better part of the afternoon. You knew he always wanted you after a long day of meetings. You always waited for him, no matter what position he requested, no matter how sore your body was, no matter how desperate you were. This time was no different, except it was.

Before he had left that morning, he had made you a promise. Today you would be getting what you had been desperately wanting for months now. In the quiet comforts of your shared bedroom, he had whispered his promise - that he would give you a child.

It had taken you ages to convince him. He argued that he had never felt the need for a second child, or that he was too old to start over again. But he loved you too much. He could never say no to you, despite the cruel games you two liked to play in the bedroom, and apparently you had finally persuaded him.

Lucius dragged his ring clad hands down your thighs, his nails biting into the flesh. You hissed at the feeling, but instinctually you spread your legs even further for him. “That’s a good pet. You’re just desperate to get filled, aren’t you?” He asked with a cruel chuckle.

Too overwhelmed by his presence, all you could manage was an enthusiastic nod, staring up at him with desperation in your eyes. Lucius wasn’t pleased with that because within the next second his hand was wrapped around your throat, his rings pinching the skin on your neck from how tightly he was gripping you.

“Use your words, you filthy little slut,” he gritted out. He was looming over you now, the fabric from his suit dragging against your hardened nipples, his legs directly between yours.

“Y-yes, Master. Want- want to be filled,” you choked out, barely getting enough air to form a coherent thought let alone speak, but you managed.

Finally satisfied, he loosened his grip. Slowly, so fucking slowly, he removed his suit jacket and removed his wand from it’s holster, purposefully putting it to the side to prove that he wouldn’t cast an contraceptive charm on you. You watched his every move, completely entranced by his casual display of dominance even if he really wasn’t doing anything special. He knew exactly how to move, exactly what to say, exactly what look to give you to get you squirming.

His hand returned to gripping your throat once it was all over. Your head was already dizzy and he hadn’t even properly touched you yet.

“You’ll get what you want, pretty pet,” he said lowly, a tender sparkle in his otherwise menacing grey eyes letting you know he wanted what was to come just as much as you did.

“But,” he continued.

You could feel yourself tense under that one simple word. You knew getting what you wanted was never easy when it came to this man. Not in the bedroom, at least. Every game came with a caveat that was sure to leave your head spinning and your body desperate for more, despite the severity of some of Lucius’ more difficult tasks.

“I’m keeping my hand right here the whole time,” he explained, tightening his grip on your neck almost painfully to prove his point. “If you pass out before you get my seed inside you, that would be such a shame. You wouldn’t want to miss it, would you?”

You couldn’t help the desperate moan that spilled from your lips. He knew this was your favorite game. And he was so deliciously cruel for deciding to play it tonight. He knew how badly you wanted to feel him spill inside of you, fill you with the seed of his child. You were determined to make that happen for yourself.

He didn’t even miss a beat the moment he saw understanding and raw determination and lust fill your eyes. With his free hand, he freed his cock from his perfectly tailored slacks and pushed inside of you with one long, deep thrust. The moan you let out was close to a scream as you felt every inch of his perfect cock stretch and fill you, the both of you throbbing with anticipation.

“That’s a good slut. Take what I give you,” Lucius mused, pausing for a moment. You weren’t sure whether the brief lull was for your benefit or his own, but you wanted it to end.

“Please, Master. Please fuck me,” you begged, your hips attempting to roll into his but it was a futile attempt. With his free hand, he easily pinned down your waist, forcing you to come to a stop.

“Take. What. I. Give. You,” he gritted out, punctuating every word with a powerful thrust deep inside of you.

You couldn’t even begin to form a response. All you could do was feel and moan and try to fucking breath. His cock was plunging in and out of you with a force unlike ever before, leaving you breathless yet more alive than ever.

His hand never once wavered from his tight grip, forcing your breaths to become increasingly shallow as time went on. Your head was spinning from the sensation, only increasing your high and bringing you closer and closer to your climax.

“How badly do you want me to breed you?” He asked, barely a hint of breathlessness in his voice, as if he wasn’t fucking you like an animal.

His question snapped you back to reality and you looked up into his grey eyes, and you almost came just from the eye contact alone. His eyes were liquid fire, all of his desire and lust and love pouring out like lava into your very soul.

He must have read the answer in your eyes, but still it didn’t satisfy him. “Use your words,” he said more gently, lightly tapping your cheek with his fingers to snap you out of your lust filled daze.

“So- so bad. Pl- Please, Master,” you gasped out, fighting desperately to stay coherent. You wanted this more than anything. You weren’t sure if you even could, but you were prepared to beg more if that’s what he wanted from you. You would give him anything, do anything for him, just to have this. You were clawing at your own mind to stay afloat, trying to push past the daze you were in from the way his cock was lighting you up inside. Frantic breaths fell from your mouth, barely recognizable sounds falling from your lips. You could only imagine what you looked like. Debauched, fucked out, filt-

“Cum.”

Your world went quiet as your body followed Lucius’ order. Your mind had barely caught up by the time your body was shaking and convulsing beneath him, your vision white.

Your mind stayed suspended in time for a moment, before you finally heard him groan and begin to spill inside of you.

And then everything went black.

~~~

When you finally landed back on Earth you were still in Lucius’ office, but he had relocated you to the couch, his firm body pressed against your as your eyes fluttered open.

You curled your body impossibly closer to his, wanting to be as close as humanly possible, at least for a little while.

“There’s my sweet girl,” he whispered into your hair when he felt you move, his arms tightening around your body perfectly. “How are you feeling?”

“Perfect,” you said honestly. “But I’m a little sad I missed it when you came.”

He chuckled lightly at that before responding. “Darling, unless this child is an absolute miracle than I’m sure we’ll have to do this quite a bit more before you get pregnant,” he explained lightly.

You couldn’t even help the shiver that ran down your spine at the promise of more, your whole body perking up.

“A bit more? As in, a bit more right now?” You asked, sitting up so you could look at him, praying to Merlin that you were giving him the eyes that made him fold every time.

“You’re insatiable,” he commented, clearly amused.

“Oh, so are you,” you chided, getting up off the couch and slowly making your way to the door.

“And just where do you think you’re running off to?” He asked, his eyebrow arched menacingly but you weren’t buying it for a second, not when he had that fond look in his eyes.

“I think we could both use a shower,” you asked, slightly turning in the doorway so he had a perfect view of your ass. “You coming, Daddy?” You asked, barely holding back your giggle at the new nickname as you began to walk away.

But you couldn’t hide your smile when you heard him following you, ever devoted to loving you in every way you deserved.

[ghostdrew22]

Burning From The Inside Out || Draco Malfoy

Requested: No Pairing: Draco Malfoy x fem!reader Warnings: slight angst, slight smut, swearing, mentions of abuse and self-harm Summary: Draco and Y/N evolve from fake dating to friends with benefits to… nothing? Commitment issues, and a general distaste for love, stand in the way of the two of them becoming more.

WORDS : 4710

Lyric snippets I used are from “Love Song” by YUNGBLUD and they’re not in chronological order.

<~>

“All I learned growing up was that love chewed me up Spit me out on the pavement next to the cuts And the blood that my mum and dad would Always take out on each other.”

Draco had always thought that love was fake- a neurological con job meant to bring your guard down and distract you from the more important things in life such as money, sex and success. It made sense why he felt that way- having grown up watching his parents claw at each other until blood was caught between their nails and the venom from their harsh words was lacing the atmosphere so thickly, it felt like a fog- he was bound to think that love didn’t exist.

So when his friends began ask why he wasn’t dating one of the many people that were basically falling at his feet, he froze up. How could he have possibly explained that he thought love was a ridiculous waste of time because he’d watched his parents approach to it and it scarred him so much that he wanted to leave the whole thing alone? He couldn’t. So he did the next best thing, he asked you to fake-date him.

It was a ludicrous idea, you both knew that, but you were his best friend for years and you loved him an immeasurable amount so you figured that there was no harm in helping him out. Besides, you had a lot of people hot on your trail too and you just weren’t interested in romantically committing to anyone- more attracted to the concept of sex with no strings than to the idea of being in a long-term romantic relationship with someone.

But in all honestly, you still don’t know why you’d agreed to do it, it was stupid and a very obvious recipe for disaster. I mean in the moment it had felt like a good enough idea to get Harry Potter off of your back and Pansy Parkinson off of his, but even at the time you knew that you were playing with fire and one of you was bound to get burned.

And the thought surfaced again when you two crossed territory from friends to friends with benefits. It had started with an innocent kiss on his cheek now and then- to convince everyone that you two were actually dating- but as the weeks went by and people began to get suspicious about your lack of PDA (considering Draco’s possessive nature and your touchy nature) it became apparent that the two of you had to up your game. And one afternoon when you were kissing him on the way to class, a switch seemed to flip and soon enough you were pressed up against the broom closet wall as he sunk himself deep inside your walls- trying then and there to drown every inch of you with his touch, to leave every part of you scorching with the feel of him.

It definitely wasn’t love, that much you knew. It was more just an insatiable hunger to destroy one another - to be the best that either of you had ever had so that you would both be ruined for whoever dared to come next. Maybe that should’ve been the first red flag, the first time you noticed just how toxic your little routine was, but it didn’t matter then and frankly, it doesn’t matter much to you now. Because with him logic is quickly thrown out the window and all you can seem to think about is sinking your teeth into him, making him yours, branding him so that the entire school knows not to touch what you’ve claimed as your own- even if there’s no romantic feelings involved, there’s still a harsh possession that nests itself within your relationship. A dark desire to own and be owned in the most filthy of ways, to be looked at like a meal and devoured like a feast by one and one only.

~~~

“Wanna get rid of my period for 9 months?” You groan from your place on the bed and Draco gapes at you.

“Y/N you are so foul!” He exclaims with a chuckle and you barely manage a laugh in your pained state. “Most girls would offer to take me out to dinner first, maybe undress me slowly-“

“When have I ever undressed you slowly?” You ask with a knowing eyebrow raise and Draco smirks back at you.

“Fair point.” He replies and you groan in pain again, “It’s okay, I’m coming don’t worry.” He drops his schoolbag on your bedroom floor and peels his shoes off of his feet before pulling out a brown paper bag from his schoolbag and crawling into bed beside you.

“I got you meds from Madame Pomfrey, drink this now.” He hands you a potion, “It should kick in within the hour.”

“That’s too long.” You whine and he deadpans you- making you shift under his gaze and drink the potion. “It tastes like utter shit.”

“You drink it every month, why aren’t you used to it?” He asks with a laugh and you shrug.

“I think I force myself to forget.”

“Weirdo.” He mumbles before digging back into the paper bag, “I brought you chocolate and Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans to keep you munching.” He pulls out the snacks and hands them to you, “Heat compress to alleviate the pain till the potion kicks in.” He puts the heat compress on your lower abdomen, “And I brought ’Sense & Sensibility’ from the library to keep you distracted.”

“Why ’Sense & Sensibility’?”

“Because I know that you’ve currently got your obsession with muggle authors and I remember you telling me that you loved this woman’s other book so I just grabbed it quickly.” He shrugs and you smile, already starting to feel a little better.

“Thank you.”

“You don’t have to keep thanking me, we do this every month Y/N.” He chuckles.

He’s right, it is your routine. For as long as you can remember being friends with Draco, you can remember him looking after you whenever you have a really bad period- bringing you snacks, massaging you, singing to you, running you baths, anything that could possibly make you feel better. It’s consistent, one of the only things you both have to rely on, but you still can’t help the feeling of immense gratitude that washes over you every time. He always goes above and beyond for you, and you can’t help but feel grateful for him.

“Now,” He says as he drags your attention back to reality, “do you want me to read to you or do want cuddles?” He raises his eyebrows at you and you already know the answer.

“Cuddles.” He laughs at how quickly you respond and puts the book on the table beside your bed before hooking his arms around your waist and helping you both sink into the covers- your head nuzzled into chest as he lays flat on his back and rubs soothing circles into your own.

“Better?” He asks after a few minutes of him massaging your back and you nod eagerly- bringing your fingers up to trace lines across his collarbone in an effort to keep yourself occupied. He shivers at the feeling of your fingertips against his skin and you smile. “Keep doing that and I will have to take you up on that offer of taking away your period for nine months.”

~~~

“Nobody taught me how to love myself.”

“Standing there, you look at me Understanding everything”

The sudden eruption of voices in the hallway has you rapidly turning your neck toward the sound, just in time to catch a glimpse of Draco storming away from the rest of his exhausted quidditch teammates and into another hallway that leads to the dungeons. From what you’d seen he had looked furious and the rest of the team looks very solemn, so you say goodbye to Tracey Davis and quickly shuffle toward the team so that you can ask Blaise what happened.

Blaise catches your eye right before you reach him and opens his arms to hug you- draping one arm around your shoulders and pulling you into him so he can kiss your forehead. “Bad practice, he couldn’t do anything right today.” He says- already knowing what question was on your mind.

“Do you know what’s up with him?” You look up at him with furrowed eyebrows and his shakes his head with a shrug.

“No clue. He was perfectly fine this morning, then by the time practice came he was fuming.”

“He’s angry?”

“He was angry. Now he’s just… sad?” Blaise sighs, “I really don’t know what’s going on, please check on him?”

You nod with a small smile and make to leave, “I’ll go see him right now.”

By the time you reach the common room Draco’s already in his room- something you figured out from the sound of his door slamming harshly- and you trek up to it nervously.

“Draco?” You ask softly as you open the door and find him hunched over his desk- still fully draped in quidditch gear.

He snaps his head up quickly and meets your eyes with a cold stare. “What?”

“Okay, rude.” You mumble as you step into the room and lean against the door.  “Are you okay?”

He scoffs and rolls his eyes as he turns to face you from across the room, “Yeah, I’m bloody great.” He shrugs, “I’m the world’s worst seeker and my mother’s in the hospital, it’s truly a wonderful life.” He drawls sarcastically.

You push yourself off of the door at the mention of his mother and quickly stride toward him, “What do you mean your mother’s in the hospital?” You raise your eyebrows- concern erupting from your throat.

He doesn’t say anything but slowly turns behind him and picks up a letter from the desk to hand to you. He sighs and leans against the desk as you take it from him and begin to read the letter from his father.

a mild heart attack as she fell down the stairs.

Your eyes glaze over with anger as you scrunch the letter up and toss it to the ground. You’re no stranger to the abuse that goes on in the Malfoy household- having heard it yourself one night when you’d spend a weekend at their home- and you know that what Lucius really means is that he hit her so hard that she had to be hospitalised. You open your mouth to speak but Draco shakes his head and cuts you off.

“No. No Speaking.” You nod as he sighs and rubs his hands across his face in frustration. You take no offense at his words because, to be honest, nothing you could’ve said would make it better anyway. This has happened so often, too often really, that the two of you have evolved passed the need to converse about it.

“Fuck!” He exclaims suddenly and you flinch at the outburst- making him soften instantly as he turns to face you. “I’m sorry, I… I didn’t mean to startle you.”

You nod in forgiveness and he reaches his arms out for you, and you do as he asks and sink into his arms- running your hands through his hair as he leans on the desk and you stand.

“I hate him.”

“I know.” You pull away from him and cup his face so he looks into your eyes. “Go take a shower, you stink.”

He laughs sadly and nods as he stands and starts walking to the bathroom. He stops midway and turns back to you, “Will you still be here when I get back?”

“Where else would I go?” You raise your eyebrows at him with a smile and he smiles back before slipping into his prefect bathroom to shower.

While he’s showering you decide to get changed into something more comfortable- putting on one of his shirts over your underwear- and put out his favourite pyjama pants on the bed for him to wear once he’s gotten out of the shower. Then you climb into his bed and start reading the copy of ‘Sense & Sensibility’ that he got after reading with you and realising Jane Austen is actually pretty good, while you wait for him to get done.

“Nobody taught me how to love myself So how can I love somebody else?”

You’re so entranced by the book that you don’t even notice him come back into the room until he’s speaking to you from the foot of the bed. “Did you take these out for me?”

“Mhmm.” You respond without taking your eyes off the page in front of you.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welco-“ You gasp as your eyes come off the page and meet his figure. He’s still dripping from the shower, a towel tied around his torso, and he’s got bruises all around his abdomen. “Draco!”

You get up and climb round the bed to get him, and he barely has any time to slide his bottoms on before he starts shuffling away from you.

“It’s nothing, I promi-“ He winces as soon as one of your hands makes contact with a bruise near his ribs.

“Draco.” You pull your hand back angrily and speak with a warning tone.

“Y/N it’s-“

“You promised me this would stop.” You state firmly and he gulps in fear. “We’ve been friends what, 6 years now? And in the six years that we’ve known each other I’ve done a countless amount of shit for you, no fucking questions asked. I ask, no, I beg you to do one thing and you can’t even do that?”

“It just happened.” He sighs tiredly and you scoff with a laugh.

“No, it didn’t just happen. You let it happen. Or am I wrong?”

“I-“

“You know what? I don’t even want to hear it.” You walk back to the bed with a shake of your head.

You’ve asked him a million times not to go sparring with Blaise, Crabbe and Goyle before Quidditch practice because he always comes back black and blue- smothered in painful bruises on his entire abdomen. He only does it because he thinks that he deserves the pain, that in some weird way he’s getting what’s due to him for existing. It’s his own way of self-harming and it’s led him to Madame Pomfrey more times than you can possibly remember.

He promised you months ago that he’d stop for good, that he’d start taking better care of himself and stop looking for excuses to get hurt when he felt bad about himself.  But bad habits, it seems, tend to die hard when you’re self-loathing masochist who can’t trust his best friend enough to talk to her when he starts to feel like shit.

“I’m sorry, I just needed something to take my mind off of it.” He trails behind you and picks up his wand to cast a silencing charm- anticipating the screaming match that you’re both about to have.

“Why didn’t you just talk to me? I’m your fucking best friend, what the hell else am I here for?”

“I know, I’m sorry I just…”

“You just?”

“I’m always coming to you with my problems, burdening you with my thoughts and it’s just not fair.”

“What?” You snap at him in confusion.

“I come crying to when my parents are doing their usual shit, I come to you when I have a bad Quidditch game, I come to you when I get a bad grade- fuck- I even come to you when I’m too scared to get into a relationship-“

“I chose to help you with that, don’t fucking act like you forced me into this because it was mutually beneficial.”

“That’s not the bloody point Y/N!” He yells in exasperation.

“Then what is the fucking point Draco?” You yell back.

He sighs, clenches his fists and closes his eyes. “The point is, I’m more bad than good for you, I’m a burden.”

You gasp at his words and sit on the edge of the bed as you look up at him in astonishment. That’s what he said to you the first time that you talked about his home life, ‘I think that they fight because of me, I ruined their lives. I’m a burden.’

“You’re not a burden.”

“You say that now. Until the day when you want more comes and I can’t give it to you.” He sits on the edge of the bed beside you, “One day this won’t be enough- you’ll want someone who can love you the way that you want to be loved- and I won’t be strong enough to do that. And then I’ll lose the only good thing I have in my life.”

“I’ll never leave you- I don’t think I could even if I tried.” You laugh awkwardly and pull him into your chest for a hug. “I don’t want more Draco, I don’t think I ever will. It sounds hard to believe but being best friends who occasionally have mind-boggling sex is quite enough for me, it makes me happy.”

“Promise me that you’ll tell me if you want more.” He mumbles into your chest.

“I promise bug.” You whisper as you rub his back soothingly- letting him relax into your embrace.

After a few seconds of silence he speaks again, “They’re going to kill each other.” He whispers- so quiet that you think maybe you imagined it-   before a soft sob escapes his lips.

“Shh, it’s okay.” You whisper back and continue soothing him by running your fingers along his bare back- stopping every few seconds to massage his ribs a bit- in an effort to help him calm down.

You don’t tell him that they won’t, because in all honesty you don’t know if they won’t, but you hold him tight for as long as he needs and promise him that you’ll be there for him. And that’s enough for the both of you- knowing that you’ll always be there for each other.

You sit like that for a while as he calms down and his breathing evens out- his head in your chest as one of your hands holds his and the other digs into his skin softly. It’s when he stops rubbing his thumb along the back of your hand, and instead starts rubbing it up and down your thigh, that you realise he’s finally breathing normally again. “Y/N?”

“Hm?” You hum in response as he pulls his head out of your chest and brings his lips up to your neck.

“Can we have some of that mind-boggling sex you talked about?” He asks against your collarbone and you laugh at his sudden change in attitude.

“I take it someone’s feeling better?” You ask as you let him take control of the situation and push you onto your back against the mattress.

“No.” He says, voice muffled as his lips graze against the skin on your neck, as his hands travel along your sides delicately. “But I need to feel you.”

“Dra-“ You start to protest- wanting to tell him that he can’t fuck his sadness away- but he cuts you off with a chaste kiss to your lips as his hands find their way beneath the t-shirt that you’re wearing and come up to unhook your bra.

“Please?” He asks desperately when he finally pulls away from your lips, his voice raw and raspy, “Let me take care of you princess.”

You’re still hesitant to agree, worried that he’s using this as a coping mechanism and scared that it’ll worsen the pain he’s feeling in his abdomen, but his lips find that soft spot behind your ear and you melt into his grasp like ice-cream on a thirty-degree day. “Let me make you feel good.”

“Okay.” Is all you say before he’s making good on his promise and making you feel so good that it’s as if there’s lava crawling beneath your bones.

His lips and hands are everywhere you need them, not hesitating to give you what you want as they usually do, not acting at a torturously slow pace. Tonight there’s no teasing, no tug-of-war between you both to see who cracks first, there’s just immense passion and trust- all the unsaid words left floating in the air are now dancing between your lips as they connect over and over again.

In this moment he’s Picasso and all he can think about is painting over you with his lips, his hands, his cock as it digs against your inviting walls, with every colour of the rainbow until the world itself is drained of all vibrancy because he’s given it all to you.

You meant what you said before, sex with Draco is always mind-boggling and lip-bitingly pleasurable, but this is different. It makes you finally understand what people mean when they say that they can see God at the height of their climax- that they feel as though their bodies are overheating and they’re going to combust at any moment.

He has never been this soft before, usually sex with him is fast, rough, hard, and all about building up the tallest tower of arousal so you can both knock it down with earth-shattering orgasms. But this is so different. This is soft, sensual, almost slow in a way- it says more than any words you two could possibly try to use to explain how much you value each other. You’re not in love, that’s for sure, but this feeling, this painfully exquisite moment, is the closest thing you two will ever get to uttering the words, “I love you”, to each other.

Who needs love when the two of you have each other to make you feel like you’re both burning from the inside out?

~~~

Now, as you sit next to him in Potions and watch intently as he chops up the next set of ingredients, you think that perhaps it’s you who’s going to set on fire.

“Y/N? Are you listening?”

“Hm?” You furrow your eyebrows at him as you zone back in, “Sorry, I zoned out for a second.”

“You seem to be doing a lot of that lately, are you okay?” He asks genuinely as he stops working on the potion to focus a soft gaze on you.

You gulp and nod, giving him a fake smile, “Yes, of course, don’t worry.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, seriously.” You bring your hand up to his arm as reassurance and smile again- trying to ignore how taut his muscles feel beneath your fingers, even with all the fabric between them- “What were you saying?”

“Oh!” He smiles brightly, “I was asking if you want to go down to the Black Lake next period? Since we’re both free?”

“And do what?” You narrow your eyes at him but grin still.

“I don’t know- drown ourselves, skinny dip, have a picnic- whatever your heart desires.”

“If you’re just looking for an excuse to see me naked then all you have to do is ask.” You smirk.

“I wouldn’t need to take you all the way there if I wanted to see you naked.” He grins widely and you roll your eyes, “I’ve just been wanting to go down there for a while and I thought I might as well bring you along.”

“Because you love my company?”

“Because you probably have nothing better do and no one else to hang out with.”

“We both know half the boys in this grade would drop everything for ten minutes with me, I could easily find someone to hang out with.” You reply very brazenly and he rolls his eyes at you. It’s true, more than half of the boys in the grade have tried to ask you out at least once, Potter being the most insistent, and if push came to shove you could easily find someone else to spend your free period with.

Not that you want to, free periods with Draco have actually become one of your favourite pastimes. Usually spent working on extra school work, or chatting, or trashing on Harry Potter- which happens considerably often since you both don’t like him.

“Too bad for them because you’re coming with me.”

“Because?” You raise your eyebrows at him- waiting for him to admit what you want to hear- and he mumbles a reply that you don’t quite catch- “Excuse me?”

“Because I love your company…”

“I know.” You smile with a giggle.

“Sweetheart, you are Changing my mind”

“There ain’t no excuses I swear that I’m doing my best”

“Do you still think love is fake?” You ask as you both lie in the grass and stare up at the sky- enjoying one of the only sunny days you’ll be getting this June.

“Hm?” Draco hums in questioning and you turn on your side to face him- propping your head up on your palm as you lean on your elbow.

“Love. Do you still think it’s a hoax?”

He sighs and blinks a bit before taking a gulp and averting his eyes from the sky to meet your own. “I don’t know.”

���I think in the time that we’ve been pretending to date, I’ve felt a lot of new emotions that I’d never felt before. I can’t tell you if it’s love or not because well, I don’t know what that’s supposed to look like or feel like, but I do know that I like it. It’s different to anything I’ve ever felt before because it’s comfortable and warm- it’s home in a way. It’s the kind of feeling home is meant to give me, not the dread and fear I feel when I get off the Hogwarts Express and find my parents waiting for me on the platform. Not the emptiness I feel when I have to sit through dinners with them and we have to pretend that we’re a happy family. Not the sadness I feel when I’m locked up in my room and I can hear them screaming at each other at the top of their lungs downstairs. It doesn’t feel like what I feel when I think of the Malfoy Manor, the only way I can describe what it feels like is by saying that it feels like what I feel when I think of you, or when I’m with you.”

“And what do you feel when you think of me?” You ask.

“I feel safe and happy and like there’s fire coursing through my veins - almost like I’m burning from the inside out. I don’t know if that’s what love is supposed to feel like- I’ve got no one to ask- but I know that I like feeling that way.” He closes his eyes and takes a breath, “So, to answer your question, I don’t know if I still think love is fake. All I know is that I don’t feel that hopelessness that usually consumes me, when I’m with you.”

You look at him in awe- utterly speechless and completely amazed by the words he’s just spoken to you. You can’t ask him for anything more than that, he’s clearly trying his best to be open to love and honest with you, and you don’t really want more anyway- it’s enough knowing that the two of you make each other happy. What you two have is enough. “You are fucking ethereal.” You breathe out as you sink back to the ground and go back to looking at the sun.

“So are you.” Draco says back as he picks up your hand and intertwines your fingers together. He doesn’t think that love is a hoax, he thinks that maybe he’s falling in love with you, but he’s not ready to admit that just yet- not when the fear of the only solid good thing in his life disappearing still haunts him with every waking moment. Not when you’re not showing any signs of romantic attraction toward him, because he can’t afford to be another dotted line in your book of conquests just because he got soft and caught feelings for you.

He’s not sure of himself yet, how can he be when no one ever taught him how to trust in his ability to be lovable? How can he be when even his own mother and father give him leftover scraps of affection veiled as the unconditional love of parents. Letting himself fall in love with you is a big risk to take when his own insecurities swarm his thoughts day and night, when his own fear of commitment swallows him up whole at every interval in which he thinks he’s ready to be vulnerable. No, he’s not ready to fall in love with you yet. But he’s trying to get there.

<~>

So, this ending is not what I originally envisioned, that one was a lot more compact and fluffy than this one is but I much prefer this one. When I first started writing this fic I actually started with the ending and worked my way backwards but when I finally got to the beginning I realized that the ending just didn’t fit anymore and I had to end it here.

I’m much happier with this ending because it’s undefined and open to interpretation. In a way Y/N is aromantic but in a way she’s also not- I couldn’t decide so I left it in a way that the reader can decide.

I’m planning on using the original ending in something different, which I will post here once it’s done, but yeah, this is the fic.

Anyway, love you all,

jean <3

[llendrinall]

What would Harry and Draco be like if they were parents? How would your take on it be from their child/ren's birth to adulthood?

Sorry if my English doesn't sound right.

Well, on the one hand I don’t think either of them would want to have children. Or rather, neither wants to be a parent. Harry knows too well what a bad childhood does to you and I imagine he would be terrified at the prospect of something happening to Draco and him and leaving his child an orphan. Sure, Ron and Hermione would take that hypothetical kid, but what if something happened to them too? And to the rest of the Weasleys? And Luna? And Neville? What would happen to the kid them? James and Lily gave Harry a godfather and it didn’t stop Harry from growing up in an abusive home. So Harry would be super anxious about that, imagining more and more elaborate scenarios in which anyone remotely capable of raising a kid without giving them life-long trauma would be unavailable, and Harry’s kid would end up in hard and uncaring hands, just like Harry and Neville.

(And I’m sure Neville doesn’t help on that respect when he says he won’t be having kids and if he has any, he wants them to have their mother surname. No Longbottom will have a claim to them).

Draco knows his parenting role models are awful. He was extremely spoiled while also suffering immense pressure. Draco got all the candy and gifts he ever wanted, but he was also expected to excel at school, be a powerful wizard and become a Death Eater. It’s not that he doesn’t have a frame of reference, it’s that the one he has is really, really, bad. How do you go not giving your child a mix of anxiety and self-absorption? He would sure like to know.

On the other hand, I’m sure that Harry will adopt anyone who stands still long enough. He is not one to let pain make him hard and cold. Rather, his suffering made him more compassionate.

So he and Draco would eventually adopt a kid (or two or three). Although they might also get an accidental biological magical child too. Let’s give the kid a name, just to make writing easier. Say, Celeste. Celeste the most likely adopted, but still possibly biological magical child.

Celeste would be happy and loved. Probably an only-child for a long time, because both Harry and Draco would still be scared at the notion of parenthood. Celeste would learn quickly to entertain themselves and relate to adults better than to other children.

Harry would stress about Celeste’s wellbeing and having them be self-reliable. Draco would insist on letting the child express themselves and find their own interests. There would be a lot of mistakes and doubts, but overall they would do fine.

Celeste would grow up under the assumption that candy exists only as a Weasley family tradition. Like, candy is something that the Weasleys do but no other household has it. Celeste has certainly never seen a candy treat that didn’t come from Weasley hands.

It’s because Draco has this weird crusade against treats. He got so many as a child! It’s a wonder Draco didn’t develop an eating disorder. There were many other aspects where Draco was spoiled silly, but since he wants Celeste to have a broom and learn to fly young, and also play an instrument and what’s the word? A game-boy, Celeste ought to play muggle games too, Draco is focusing on treats and candy which are completely banned at their household. The Weasleys just ignore the prohibition. It evens out. Celeste has some candy, but not as much as they would otherwise get.

I love the idea of Celeste developing magic (especially if they are some sort of magical biological child, because people would see them as Potter 3.0 Malfoy edition) receiving the Hogwarts letter, going to Diagon Alley to buy a wand, everything, all the little traditions and rituals, and once they arrive to Hogwarts… they don’t like it. Beautiful magical place, yes, but it’s still a boarding school. Putting aside that everyone, from teachers to students, looks at them weird because of who Celeste’s parents are, Celeste misses home, isn’t making friends because it takes them a while to open up and overall is having a bad time.

So Harry and Draco take Celeste back home. No questions. Their child wrote saying they didn’t like it there, so Harry and Draco removed their child from that situation immediately. There is no reason they can’t apparate every day for lessons and even if there were, even if there were all kind of obstacles… Their child wrote asking for help and harry and Draco want to do better.

They take Celeste home, where Celeste has all their stuff, is happy and can see Oso. (Oso is the family dog. A huge mastiff so called after a picture in a children’s book. The picture was of a bear, but to be honest Oso does look like a bear to any well informed three-year old).

Of course Hogwarts doesn’t agree with the new arrangement. Harry reminds them that on Halloween of his first year they had a troll roaming inside and things only got worse after that. Harry is told that most of those unfortunate events where a consequence of Voldemort. Nowadays Hogwarts is perfectly safe and perhaps Harry is letting his anxieties take undue hold of him.

“What about the student bullying?” Harry says, with heroic calm. He would rather set the desk on fire.

“What about it? There are centaurs in the forest, but no bulls, I assure you, and as you well known, Mr Potter, students are prohibited from wandering the forest. I do think you are seeing threats where there are none”.

Ah, of course. The wizarding world isn’t familiar with the concept of “bullying”. The application and execution, they know it well, but they don’t’ have a word for what is considered normal conduct.

Celeste attends the rest of the year as if it were a normal school, which is widely criticized although there are also many other parents interested.

And then… The academic year ends and Celeste drops out of Hogwarts. The whole wizarding world comes to a stop, although one should specify that in this case “the whole wizarding world” means “English wizarding society”. The continent doesn’t care if a child attends school or not. Welsh and Scotland care, but not enough to come to a halt. They do discuss it, but they go on with their business. It’s the English wizards who seem to have a problem with it. From September to December the papers write about nothing else.

The things is, Celeste has acquired some of Harry’s anxieties and is concerned with how little they were learning at Hogwarts. A lot of magic, yes, but nothing on language (and Celeste loves reading and learning languages) and even less about math. Not that Celeste likes math, but they worry about not knowing how to adequately manage the family fortune when their parents are gone. You know how wealth does not last three generations? Well, it certainly won’t if Celeste doesn’t learn how to balance expenses. Celeste wants to learn enough that they won’t be vulnerable to their solicitor., and when they put it that way even his gransfather has to admit there is a point.

(And maybe Harry failed Celeste here, letting his child worry so much about becoming an orphan, but Harry routinely receives dead threats and Draco has suffered two attempts on his life, so).

Harry couldn’t be more proud. No benevolent-looking wizard will take advantage of Celeste. Draco is also very happy because Celeste’s muggle school has art lessons in the curriculum and they have Drama as an extra-curricular. Celeste doesn’t want to sign to Theatre, but the mere fact it’s there pleases Draco immensely.

The ministry makes Celeste sits the OWLs in order to keep their wand. There are parents asking about educations alternatives, so the Ministry hopes that once Celeste fails people will accept Hogwarts as it comes, none of that day-school nonsense and hiring qualified teachers.

Except muggle school prepares you really well for the study process (or maybe, it simply prepares you better than magical schools do) so Celeste excels at the written exams. They do really, really, well, which is something Hermione Granger had been predicting for the last four years but nobody listened to her, so she is even more chuffed than Harry and Draco. Hermione has won sixteen different bets and is going to bring parliamentary reform to the education system.

Celeste’s spell work could see some improvement, but they have no trouble conjuring a corporeal patronus and that still qualifies as an automatic O in DADA. With that and some luck in Transfigurations, Celeste graduates Hogwarts having only attended a year. Lucius Malfoy, who is still racist but above all is a social creature and social climber, gives a week-long ball to celebrate his grandchild academic achievement. He also gifts Celeste a summer trip around Europe. Correction, because Lucius knows both Harry and Draco, but specially Draco, are very strict with gifts, he makes a donation to Celeste’s school language club. Did Lucius pay so thirty-odd muggle teenagers can spend three weeks around Europe practicing their foreign languages? Why, he sure did. And you won’t disappoint said children, will you Draco? I will take the money back if you ask me to, but little Prisha will be crushed.

There is a Prisha in Celeste’s school. Lucius is either weirdly stalkerish or paying attention to Celeste.

So maybe Celeste has inherited some anxieties and complexes, like many children do, but Lucius has become a better person and a pretty cool grandfather, so overall I think Harry and Draco are good parents.

[gameofdrarry]

Wizards Hearts Recs: Hogwarts Eighth Year

Wizards Hearts was a four-month-long Drarry reading fest. Players were given a playing deck of 52 tropes, and were asked to find 52 different fics to read and comment on to fill their decks. To prevent the same few fics from being read, fics were restricted to only being used for the game three times before being considered ineligible for further points. The tropes and submissions list can be found here.

Check out the masterlist of fics for this trope below the cut!

📜 The Standard You Walk Past by bafflinghaze Rated:  Mature Words:  46202 Tags: Hogwarts Eighth Year, Some Homophobia in the Wizarding World, Romance, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, flangst, Angst, SO MUCH FLUFF, And a bit of sap, Legilimency, Dreams and Nightmares, Slow Build, Prejudice Against Slytherins, Roommates, Redeemed Draco Malfoy, Minor Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Minor Lucius Malfoy/Narcissa Malfoy - Freeform Summary:  On returning to Hogwarts for their Eighth Year, Headmistress McGonagall decided to room Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter together. She may have hoped for a leading example of house unity; the other students fully expected insults and fights. But nothing happened. That was, until Harry sleepwalked into Draco’s bed. Translation links available inside for Indonesian, Chinese, Korean, Russian, Thai, Spanish, and Portuguese ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Montaigne Aspirations by countingcr0ws Rated:  Mature Words:  16681 Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Post-War, Head Boy Draco Malfoy, Head Girl Hermione Granger, Good Draco Malfoy, Hufflepuff Common Room, Hufflepuff Draco Malfoy, Draco Malfoy Needs a Hug, Harry Potter Has Long Hair, Discussion of Abortion, discussion about consent, Mutual Pining, Hufflepuff Harry Potter, Hufflepuff Hermione Granger Summary:  Draco’s been trying to be nothing but upstanding since you know what. Between crawling into places every day (oh, the woe) in his new yellow tie, avoiding heterosexual threats to the proper development of his young homosexual self, and being exhausted by how high maintenance Gryffindors are, Draco’s eighth year is still a lot better than he had initially expected. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Only Fools Fall (For You) by welpslytherin Rated:  Explicit Words:  6212 Tags: Hogwarts Eighth Year, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, The Great Lake | The Black Lake (Harry Potter), Skinny Dipping, Pining, Fluff and Angst, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, First Time, Mutual Pining Summary:  It’s the summer of '98 and a certain blond Slytherin has amends to make and feelings to get over. Featuring skinny dipping, a bold Harry Potter, and a blushing Draco Malfoy. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Pinned! by whileatwiltshire Rated: General Words:  4193 Tags: Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Pining Harry Potter, Pining Draco Malfoy, Mutual Pining, Oblivious Draco Malfoy, Draco curses a lot in this! Summary:  What's your game, Potter?" he asked calmly as Potter's face floated an inch away from him. After their second proximity incident, Draco had taken special care to note the specky git's whereabouts and behaviour; watching him with the corner of his eye whenever he could. And in his observation, he had noticed that while Potter did fumble around like a blind fool without his glasses, not once, once, did he pull anyone as close to his eye level to confirm their identity. It was only Draco. Only him. And Draco needed to find out why. Or, Five times Draco got pinned to the wall by Potter, who was surely, up to something. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Take All That You See by GallifreyisBurning Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  19666 Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Bullying, Boys Kissing, First Kiss, Coming Out, Leaked Sex Photographs, Off-Screen Reference to Gore, Redeemed Draco Malfoy, Draco Malfoy Has Panic Attacks, Lucius Malfoy Being an Asshole, Disowned Draco Malfoy, Supportive Harry Potter, Minor Seamus Finnigan/Dean Thomas, Hogwarts Eighth Year, H/D Sex Fair 2020 Summary:  Draco Malfoy has only two goals for his eighth year are Hogwarts: 1) stay as invisible as possible, and 2) get enough NEWTs to be accepted at a university abroad and get the hell out of the UK. Everything is going according to plan until he is unceremoniously outed by the Daily Prophet and subsequently disowned. Finding himself the unexpected focus of unwanted attention and harassment, he is suddenly dependent on the good will and protection of the last people he would have expected — Harry Potter and his gang of do-gooder Gryffindors (plus Luna Lovegood). With his world turned upside down, how will Draco make it through the rest of the year? And worse still, as he grows closer and closer to Harry, how will he get out with his heart intact? ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 For every question why, you were my Because by HugsandButterflyKisses Rated:  Explicit Words:  59924 Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Coming Out, First Time, Mutual Pining, i'll update as we go on dw, harry is a lil clueless but hes got the spirit, Sharing Clothes, Masturbation, Slow Burn, Shower Sex, Halloween, just a lot of shenanigans by the slytherins Summary:  Harry expects his final year at Hogwarts to be simple. Go to class, hang out with Ron and Hermione, and most importantly, no threats of dying. It seems fate, and the Slytherins, have other plans. or The Eighth Year fic where Harry and Draco can't seem to get rid of one another. But...maybe neither of them mind all that much. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 White Lies by cassisluna Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  171013 Tags: Slash, Homosexuality, EWE, AU, Mutual Pining, Pining Harry, Pining Draco Malfoy, Hurt/Comfort, Potions Accident, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Hogwarts Era Summary:  Draco drinks a potion that makes him know if a person is lying, and Harry, apparently at fault that Draco is this way, is forced to 'help' him with the effects of the potion. For the first time, they deal with each other with no lies to hide behind. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 knickers in a twist by technicolourbeat Rated:  Explicit Words:  86461 Tags: Hogwarts Eighth Year, Reconciliation, Smut, Crossdressing, Boys in Skirts, Bottom Draco Malfoy, Top Harry Potter, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Semi-Public Sex, Riding, Topping from the Bottom, Draco Malfoy in a Skirt, Rimming, Lace Panties, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Public Sex, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Secret Relationship, Fuckbuddies, Shameless Smut, Sexual Roleplay, Fluff and Humor, Porn With Plot Summary:  Draco loses a bet to Pansy and Blaise which leaves him wearing a skirt for a whole week. Harry discovers something about himself. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Blue Roses and Other Impossible Things by Cassiara Rated:  Explicit Words:  40283 Tags: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Homophobic Language, Angst, Fluff, First Time, Bottom Harry, Top Draco Malfoy, Hogwarts Eighth Year, POV Harry Potter, Virgin Harry, Happy Ending, Slow Burn, Bad Flirting, Loss of Virginity, Podfic Welcome, Pining, Getting Together Summary:  After Harry saved Draco from the Room of Requirement there was a moment when Draco gave Harry a look. Harry didn’t know what to make of it, and he had a war to fight so he ignored it. Now though, they’re back at Hogwarts sharing a dorm and Harry is obsessed with seeing that look again. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 In the Midnight Blue by xanthippe74 Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  5508 Tags: Hogwarts Eighth Year, Christmas, Light Angst, Developing Relationship, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Anxiety, Dreams and Nightmares, Flying, Hopeful Ending, Winter, HP Wireless Festive Minifest 2020, Songfic Summary:  On a Christmas Eve broom ride over Hogwarts, Harry shows Draco that he’s braver than he thinks. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Owl Was Well by fencer_x Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  66823 Tags: Post-Second War with Voldemort, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Hogwarts, Animagus, Animagus Draco Malfoy, Owls, Snarky Draco Malfoy, Snarky Harry Potter, Snark, Draco Malfoy & Pansy Parkinson Friendship, Sexually Adventurous Blaise Zabini, Humor, Toilet humor, POV Draco Malfoy, Invasion of Privacy, Brief Mention of Animal Death(s), Fighting, Minor Injuries, H/D Erised 2020, Slow Burn Summary:  Draco Malfoy is not an owl, really he isn’t. He simply assumes the shape of one on occasion when he wants to find a bit of privacy—a goal entirely thwarted because Harry Potter doesn’t understand you can’t just grab any old bird from the Owlery and force it to send your missives and deliver your packages. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 The Nightmare Club by Elle Gray (Elle_Gray) Rated:  Explicit Words:  85072 Tags:  Post-Second War with Voldemort, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Tropes, Banter, Slow Burn, Humor, Trials, Light Angst, Sentient Doors, Male Friendship, Friendship, Misunderstandings, Pining, Jealousy, Jealous Harry Potter, Jealous Draco Malfoy, Accidental Voyeurism, Voyeurism, Forced Proximity, Snarky Draco Malfoy, Sarcastic Harry Potter, Smut, Sexual Fantasy, Masturbation, Blow Jobs, Frottage, Coming Out, Oblivious, Drinking, Drunken Shenanigans, Feelings Realization, Secret Relationship, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Herbology, Herbology Class (Harry Potter), Plants, working together, Veritaserum, Cuddling & Snuggling, Spooning, Pajamas & Sleepwear, Tea, Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Awkwardness, Minor Harry Potter/Lisa Turpin, H/D Erised 2018, Community: hd_erised, Bisexual Harry Potter, Bisexual Draco Malfoy, Mental Health Issues, supportive friends, wanking, Harry in a towel, Minor slut-shaming?, Feel free to podfic this, Fanart also welcome, remix to your heart's content, tell me about typos you find as well, Gay Mentor Charlie Weasley Summary:  Hermione and Ron are going back to Hogwarts to do N.E.W.T.s, Ginny isn't. Harry hasn't decided, until he has, in front of the Wizengamot and now he's responsible for Malfoy as well. A tale of enemies who learn to get along, get it wrong and get it on. Everything is purple, some things are on fire and no-one is sleeping properly. But don't worry, there's tea! ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Read All About It by Samunderthelights Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  3247 Tags: Drarropoly: Founders Edition - A Drarry Game/Fest, Epistolary, The Owlery (Harry Potter), Secret Relationship, Drarry, Letters, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Boys In Love, Self-Acceptance Summary:  The story of a budding romance between two young men, told through letters found in the Hogwarts Owlery. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Adventures of a Suicidal Gentleman by GallaPlacidia Rated:  Not Rated Words:  47794 Tags: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Grief/Mourning, Suicidal Thoughts, suicidal Draco but he's fun about it, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Draco and his new best friend Misty the house elf, Draco is trying to keep his shit together, Pining Harry, Down and Out Draco Malfoy, It's less harrowing than it initially appears, Veritaserum Summary:  Draco wants to kill himself, but he's trying not to be dramatic about it. Harry wants to sleep with Draco, but he's trying not to be obvious about it. Misunderstandings! Pining! Grief! Self-loathing but in a kind of charming way? Feat. Misty the house elf who takes shit from no one, an Astoria who has her own mysterious aims, a Draco who is determined to use humour to get through things, and a Harry doesn't know what he wants, except maybe to touch Draco's pretty face. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Sincere Gratitude from the (Heart) Mouth by _Melodic_ (Sae) Rated:  Mature Words:  1049 Tags: Blow Jobs, Semi-Public Sex, Public Blow Jobs, Dubiously Consensual Blow Jobs, Smut, Fluff and Smut, Gratuitous Smut, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn, Porn with Feelings, Redemption, Oral Sex, Getting Together, First Time, POV Harry Potter, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Post-War, Hogwarts Express, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Hogwarts Era, Confessions, Romantic Fluff, Humor, Fluff and Humor, Fluff, Fluffy Ending Summary:  Harry Potter knew, of course, that everyone was grateful to him for defeating Voldemort and basically saving the world, but he didn’t quite expect the way some of those would go about expressing their gratitude. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Black Me Out by JBankai89 Rated:  Mature Words:  43928 Tags: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Trans!Harry, FTM Harry, Romance, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Mild OoC, Transphobia, Hate Crime, ron & seamus bashing, EWE, PostWar, Hogwarts Eighth Year, References to Mpreg Summary:  Since his first day at Hogwarts, Harry has had a secret. Not even his best friends knew, and returning after the war for his seventh year, Harry is looking forward to a nice, quiet, Voldemort-free year. What he hadn't expected was Ron and Seamus discovering his secret and reacting violently to the news, nor did he expect his old school rival suddenly showing romantic interest in him. ❤️ Read on AO3

📜 Try to Change by meshtams Rated:  Teen and Up Words:  1567 Tags: Hogwarts Forbidden Forest, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Boys In Love, Love Confessions, Getting Together, Fluff, Musician Draco Malfoy, Song fic??, Gay Draco Malfoy, Bisexual Harry Potter, Tattooed Draco Malfoy, POC Harry Potter, try to change by mother mother Summary:  Harry hears music coming from the forbidden forest, and naturally has to investigate. ❤️ Read on AO3

[becausetherearestars]

Second Introductions

Chapter Five of Lord Thanatos here

~ Draco didn’t know whether he should be happy he guessed the identity of this new Lord correctly. Draco loved being right, he really did. The idea that he was crushing hard on the Dark Lord’s new partner did however, make Draco rather apprehensive. This was someone who could probably kill him without a second thought. Someone who’s magic was almost as deadly as the Dark Lord’s. And someone who, apparently, had the trust and alliance of said Dark Lord. Things could go rather wrong for Draco if his attraction was noticed by these powerful men.

Running his eyes appreciatively over the young man in front of him, Draco realised Hadrian Peverell couldn’t be that much older than Draco himself. He still looked terribly familiar but Draco couldn’t seem to place him. it was right on the tip of his tongue before all thought flew out of Draco’s mind. Just as the Peverell Lord graced the room with a dazzling smile that threatened to make Draco’s knees weak. He caught a flash of a fang peeking out the corner of the young man’s mouth and Draco’s breath hitched. Hadrian Peverell was a Vampire and Draco honestly didn’t think this man could get any better.

His gaze reached the Vampire Lord’s eye and suddenly, Draco was hit with an overwhelming sense of familiarity. He had seen those dazzling emerald eyes before. Stared into them as he sprouted words of pure loathing. Watched them religiously across the Great Hall every day for the past five years. He had seen almost every emotion possible in those giant green orbs. How had he not recognised him earlier?

Draco physically stumbled back a step. His stomach dropping through the floor of the Dark Lord’s study. He was in so much more shit than he originally anticipated.

~

Severus was on high alert the moment he entered the Dark Lord’s office. There was a new player in the game and, as Slytherin as Severus was, he needed to know more about this man before he could ever think about serving him.

As his three companions stared in shock at the tall man in front of them, Severus used their silence to analyse Hadrian Peverell. The name sparked something in Severus. Weren’t the Peverell family related to the Potters in some way?

His eyes roamed over the new Lord and his flash of a smile at the stumbling form of his godson next to him made him notice two things; this man was a Vampire, and he looked a whole lot like an arrogant Potter. Emerald green lit up in amusement at Draco’s stunned face, lack of a Malfoy decorum, and Severus reared back in shock. Occlumency shields barely keeping the horror off his face.

No.

This couldn’t be happening! Severus’ life was about to get much more complicated.

“Harry?” he said with a break in his voice he was not proud of and would never admit to.

Those green eyes, so very like his mothers, snapped to him and bored straight into his soul. Severus’ companions gasped, incredulous looks on their faces. A small upward quirk of the young Lord’s mouth confirmed Severus’ suspicions and he lost all semblance of control, completely forgetting where he was and who was in his presence.

“Potter, what the actual fuck are you doing here? Are you trying to get yourself killed?! Are you trying to get me killed you stupid, irrational Gryffindor!” he ranted as he stalked towards the boy he’d sworn to protect with his life and magic. The rash, impulsive brat that, despite all Albus - fucking - Dumbledore’s manipulations, he’d come to respect.

“Oh, Severus. So sweet that you care,” the raven haired menace drawled, placing a hand over his heart dramatically. “But, I am perfectly safe here. In fact, right here, in this room with you five, is probably the safest I’ve ever been.”

~

Lucius was very confused. Very, very confused and getting more so every second he was in this room. Did Severus just say ‘Harry’? As in Harry Potter? There was absolutely no logical explanation for Harry bloody Potter to be in the Dark Lord’s study. Draco had said the brat was as Light as they came, Dumbledore’s personal weapon, the Golden Boy of Gryffindor. The boy could not be here and still be alive. It just didn’t make sense. And the way his son was looking at the boy; with ill concealed awe and attraction... Lucius needed answers and he needed them now.

~

Barty slunk into a plush armchair before the hearth, smug smile on his face. He had been waiting two years for this day to come. The day the Dark finally learnt the identity of his Lord. The day the war was tipped on its axis and the Dark came out unquestionably on top. For, Barty wholeheartedly believed Lord Thanatos was going to destroy Dumbledore and his insufferable Birds, and bring balance to the wizarding world once more.

Barty knew that choosing to take his Lord’s mark at the end of his fourth year was the right decision, just so he could be privy to the look of absolute astonishment on Lucius Malfoy’s face when he realised Harry Potter was not the Golden Boy he thought he was. How he enjoyed watching the man realise he did not know everything.

~

Hadrian was deeply enjoying the looks of astonishment on all three men’s faces. Especially Draco. He felt a deep seated sense of self satisfaction at breaking through the young blonde’s infallible mask. Breathing in deeply through his nose, Hadrian once again caught the scent of the Malfoy heir and confirmed what he suspected from their meeting outside Gringotts that morning. Draco Malfoy was his mate.

Hadrian wasn’t sure what to think of his newest revelation but he never had been one to argue with fate, no matter how much she screwed up his life. He decided then and there, though, that he would let the young blonde come to him. He would never force this type of bond onto someone, no matter how much he needed it personally.

“I’m sure you all have a boat load of questions, yeah?” he asked the stunned group before him. At their nods in agreement he allowed a smirk to cross his face and glanced at the Tom. The amusement shining in the man’s red eyes urged him onwards and he prepared himself to tell his life story. These people all had an important position in his life and deserved to know the real him. “I’m going to answer them all but i’ll have to ask you to wait until I’m done before you throw a fit, okay?” he said with a pointed glance at Severus, knowing this information was likely to affect him the most.

Hesitant nods were once again directed at him and Hadrian snickered at the look of pure glee written on Barty’s face over by the fire.

“Why don’t we join Barty for a drink?” He walked over to the fire and Tom summoned a House Elf to fetch a bottle of firewhiskey.

“Leave the bottle,” Tom asked the small creature as it returned with the amber liquid and six glasses. “We’re going to need it.”

[idratherstayslytherin]

My Drarry Fics Rec (Bc Why Not)

So I though I share with you (all my lovely followers) my favourite Drarry fics/fics that I really enjoyed. Gosh, I’d love to record a podfic of one of those, but like idk. Also, I might make another one of this kind of post. ENJOY. 

Lost Children   by  gracie137 

Summary: There's a lot of things Harry doesn't expect to happen after the War but Narcissa Malfoy invoking his life debt to her and asking him to save her son is top of the list.

My review: OMG! This fic has become literally one of my favourites since I finished reading it few days ago. There is everything you need even if you never knew you needed it. There is broken Draco, who is still the Draco we know from the end of the war. He is not at his best as he is almost a dead man. There is Harry who is SO WELL WRITTEN (as is everybody else), He is so cold toward Narcissas’ demand , but then he softens a little while spending time with Draco. Yet he still stays true to his book character, he doesn’t just forgive Draco, he doesn’t try to pretend like things Draco did were okay, and his cowardness doesn’t excuse what he did. The falling in love part is so beautiful, YOU WILL CRY. There is a lot of Lucius hate which I love, Narcissa is also not as nice as people sometimes paint her in her fics. She’s slightly better than Lucius, but still kind of bitch. It’s bc she loves Draco though. AND GET THIS, there is also Blaise and Pansy which are so fucking supportive, sassy, and geniuely good friends. I totally love tchem here. There is also amazing Ron and Hermione. NO GINNY BASHING and beautiful Linny . Draco and muggle things, Draco being responsible for his dark past. THERE IS GORG DRACOS’ REDEMPTION. READ IT.

YOU WILL CRY. DON’T DENY IT. GET A LOT OF TISSUES.

The Sleeping Beauty Curse   by  who_la_hoop 

Summary: When Draco Malfoy falls into a cursed sleep and can only be woken – at least, according to the Daily Prophet, that impeccable source of truth – by ‘true love’s kiss’, Harry Potter knows there’s no way on earth he’s the answer to this particular riddle. Is he . . .?

My review: FUUUUUUCK! If you’re into fake/pretend relationship, a lot of angst, jealousy, humor, redemption and whole lot of wanking then this is fic for you. Harry truly hates Draco at the beggining of this fic and gives no fucks about the Malfoys. CHARACTERS ARE SO FUCKING WELL WRITTEN I CAN”T EVEN. 

Draco has a huge heart, but is also a fucking idiot and definitely not a saint. He knows what are his mistakes and he tries to be better. His road to become decent human being and change his views on muggle borns, pure bloods, half-bloods. He pays for his mistakes. He struggles a lot, okay? He just wants to be loved and give love. He is sweet without being sweet, if you know what I mean. He just loves Harry so much and Harry is oblivious af. Harry is pinning really hard, at some point your heart breaks for both of tchem bc there is so much pinning, so many emotions flowing. SO MUCH “COMFORTING” and whole lot of not so phisical comforting. Their relationship is beautiful.This fic destroyed me in a good way. I don’t want to say more bc it ruins all the suprises.  

YOU WILL CRY. 

No Shadow Taller Than Our Souls by khasael

HEY LOOK THERE IS ALSO A PODFIC OF THAT AND I’M TOTAL SLUT FOR IT BC I LOVE PODFICS AND I LISTENED TO THIS ONE. JUST DONT FORGET TO LEEAVE KUDOS ON THE PODFIC AND WRITTER FIC. 

Summary: Auror Potter and Unspeakable Malfoy team up to investigate a series of missing persons, and it soon becomes apparent that Dementors are involved. Despite their initial misgivings, Harry and Draco find that they need each other's help, in more ways than one.

My review: This also may be one of my favourite fics! It’s so gorg I can’t ven describe it. I love Unspeakable Draco and Auror Harry teaming up and working on a case together while they talk about their past and try to understand one another . I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS DYNAMIC SO MUCH. I don’t want to spoil anything , but I’ll just say that the case is pretty interesting and Drarry’s relationship development will make you cry and you’ll feel this h=fic Warming your heart. 

All Life is Yours to Miss by Saras_Girl. 

PODFIC

Summary: Professor Malfoy's world is contained, controlled, and as solitary as he can make it, but when an act of petty revenge goes horribly awry, he and his trusty six-legged friend are thrown into Hogwarts life at the deep end and must learn to live, love and let go.

My review: IF YOU DON”T ALREADY KNOW WHO IS Saras_Girl THEN ARE YOU EVEN A DRARRY SHIPPER?! I’M A HUGE SLUT FOR ALL OF HER WORKS. This one gave me so many feels I don’t know if I can process it. 

This fic will forever stay in my heart. It starts off by usual Draco/Harry kind of childish rivalry, but when Harry is rushed into the hospital bc of SOMETHING THAT HAPPENS., Draco is there by his side. He feelsso much guilt, but also so much hate, but then something that isn’t hate at all. I love how sweet yet still Dracoish Draco is. He has grown up and you can definitely see that. There is still old Draco inside him. Harry is so in love it hurts, Draco’ s heart might explode from loving Harry. You can feel all the feels. I LOVE DRARRY TALKS IN HERE AND DRACO’S PET. I just love everything about this fic. GO READ or LISTEN TO IT NOW.

House Proud by astolat.

 PODFIC BC YES I’M STILL A SLUT FOR THEM 

Summary: His house liked Draco Malfoy more than him.

My review: Let’s keep it short. Harry is confused, angry, sassy, annoyed, Draco is annoyed, sassy, kind of a tosser and definitely super duper into scarhead. He doesn’t want to help Harry, but he is forced to, right? That’s why he stays with him for so long. I love their dynamic here. 

And an Owl Named Romeo by Rickey

GUESS WHAT? PODFIC

Summary: Draco breeds owls, Harry's an Auror, and an owl named Romeo is going to bring them together.

My review: Um. I totally love “cold” and “totally not interested and annoyed Draco” and Harry who just “wants to know more about breading owls”. I’ll let you figure out why I love this fic so much. ( a little help: PINNING, LATE NIGHT TALKS, FORGIVNESS)

Stately Homes of Wiltshire by waspabi

well… YOU KNOW WHAT

Summary: Malfoy Manor has mould, dry rot and an infestation of unusually historical poltergeists. Harry Potter is on the case.

My review: Sooooooo, I read that a while ago, but I remember crying and my heart breaking. There is so much humor in here as well if I remember well. So it’s a good fic! 

Reparatio by astolat

A little AUDIO as you of course need it

Summary: Draco snorted. “I’m not reduced to penury. I want something considerably beyond money, and I rather think you’re the only one can give it to me.”“You want the Invisibility Cloak,” Harry said, flatly. He’d half expected as much; it was the only thing he had that Draco could want—“Don’t be stupid, Potter,” Draco said. “I want my reputation back.”

My review: Draco is really a little shit here. He is so arogant and he is using Harry for his publicity after the war (well kind of himself too) has taken that away from him. You won’t like him here instantly, but you’ll grow to love him, I promise you. The end is just PERFECT. 

Landslide by Libby Drew

by this point you should know what is HERE

Summary: Harry Potter disappears, taking a sick Teddy Lupin with him. While everyone searches for their missing hero, Draco's life continues as it always has. Rumors of curses and kidnapping don't interest him. As Hogwarts' guardian, he has only one concern: the strange, miraculous events occurring on the cliffs outside the castle walls.

My review: I’ll just say that Drarry with Teddy is my weakness and I cried through that fic a lot. So just, BE READY TO FEEL YOUR HEART BREAK AT ANY TIME. It’s such a sweet, sad and healing fic. You really should listen to the recording, (BUT LEAVE KUDOS UNDER THE WRITTEN VERSION TOO).

What We Pretend We Can't See    by   gyzym 

for HEADPHONERS (it’s like 12-13 hours, so make some tea, draw, and listen)

Summary: Set 7 years after the Battle of Hogwarts: Auror Potter is summoned to a break-in at a rather eccentric little museum in the house he used to own

My review: THIS IS MY ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE FIC (well one of tchem, but you get me). evrything is so fucking well written, you feel all the emotions, characters stay true to their bookselves. You will: smile a lot, cry a lot and possibly experience heartbreak, but hey! It’s all fun and games, right? 

Burning Day: A Tale Of Rebirth by tealeaf523 (ConstantComment)

You guessed it - PODFIC

Summary: Looking for a bit of solitude over his winter holiday, Harry Potter rents a home in Scotland, only to end up in the middle of adventure amongst the snow-blanketed hills. There is a local in Castle Valley who looks uncannily like his Hogwarts school rival, but he has no memory of meeting Harry in the past. However, Harry is determined to find out what happened to Draco Malfoy between his disappearance and finding his new identity as a charming unicorn trainer at the Scotland Unicorn Reservation for Lost Youths.

My review: SO MANY EMOTIONS. A LOT OF FLUFF, BUT THEN ANGST, AND HEARTBREAK, SO MUCH LOVE YOU’LL DIE. Harry is so in love and you’d be like ewejgihwebfhdijwerufyugfuiwrejflkwejrf2q3fuhjefiofc. Draco is pinning hard as well. Harry is confused af here. 

Seeing Draco Malfoy by khalulu

If you’d rather listen THEn THERE YOU GO , podfic sluts unite

Summary: It's a few years after the war, Harry is an Auror, Ginny's broken up with him, and Draco runs a "Magical Repairs and Reparations" service. And then there’s Ignatius – devastatingly good-looking, temperamental, and addicted to gingernut biscuits. When Harry loses his glasses in a fight and learns that they’ve landed in Draco’s hands, he’s suspicious. But soon after that, life starts looking up.

My review: Honestly this fic is just Harry finding excuses to visit Draco again and again and I’m in love. I love this Draco so SO MUCH. Give it a read, or a listen if you are AMAZING. 

The Moon Looks Lovely Tonight by Omi_Ohmy

🎧

Summary: When Harry moves into the damp and empty Black house, it doesn’t quite feel like home. And then the first owl moves in. After that, it’s a steep slope leading to bed-sharing, more owls, assorted housemates, strange potions experiments, and terrible cooking. And a bit of waltzing, too.

My review: It was one of the first Drarry fics I read (listened, but shhhh) and it holds special place in my heart. I love their road to falling in love. Harry is so sweet I cry everytime I remember how awkward/pinning/caring/sweet he is. Draco is a little shit, but he loves Harry so much. There is Ron and Hermione, Luna and Goyle and they all live at Grimmauld Place with Harry. Honestly, by the end you’ll be sobbing and you’ll feel all the feels, bc our two idiots in love are so in love. 

Because Potter Is Allergic to Poppies by Lomonaaeren

🎧

Summary: Auror Harry Potter is in hospital being treated for a curse when someone tries to kill him. Obviously it is up to bored, trapped Apprentice Healer Draco, who was only admitted to the Healer Program in the first place to do the menial work, to find out who did it. Because then they will promote him. No, it’s for no other reason, thanks.

My review: MY HEART CLENCHES EVERYDAMN TIME THEY ARE PROTECTIVE OF EACH OTHER AND DON’T TAKE ANYONE’S BULLSHIT. THEY ARE SO IN LOVE - YOU MIGHT DIE FROM THE FEELINGS. THE CASE ITSELF IS SO INTERESTING YOU WON’T WANT TO PUT THIS FIC AWAY. 

Redemption by khasael

🎧

Summary: When Draco runs into Harry Potter in Muggle London, he has no idea how much the chance encounter will change his way of life. How much is he willing to learn about forgiveness?

My review: I listened that a looooooooong time ago, but I loved it and I know that bc hello I made few sketches of our boys just bc I was listening to it. It inspired me to start my art. 

The Owl Who Came for Christmas by dracogotgame

🎧

Summary: Draco has a debt to pay off, no matter what Potter thinks. And he has a Very Good Idea to go along with it. Things don't go as planned.

My review: MY TOP FAV!! It’s so fluffy and so funny. Their relationship development is truly a gift to this world. Its such a good ’Eight Year Fic. Definitely fel good fic. 

Liar   by   jad        

Summary: Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy always preferred the worst of each other; unfortunately, they had better halves.

My review: THIS HURTS LIKE A BUTT CHEEK ON THE STICK . YOU’LL SOB. ((Infidelity - H/G D/A))

Right Hand Red   by   lq_traintracks (lumosed_quill) 

HOW IS THERE NOT PODFIC OF THAT?!?!?!!??!!?

Summary: Harry felt Malfoy's breath on his lips as they came together over the bottle, hands firmly planted on the floor as though they each needed their familiar soil, refusing to cross into enemy territory.  Except that Malfoy no longer felt like his enemy.  Malfoy felt inevitable. 

My review: GOSH. It’s such a hot, but also fluffy, angsty and feel good fic, if you like party games then you’ll love it! 

One Night at the Leaky   by   birdsofshore 

Summary: Harry should have known better than to accept a drunken dare. Especially when Malfoy was sitting right there, looking like that and wearing those bloody tight trousers.

My review: SO MUCH PASSION, SO MUCH ATTRACTION, SO MUCH WANT. Harry might just have a little crush. Seamus is a wanker. All of Harry’s friends know he really has it bad when it comes to Draco Malfoy. 

Good Company  by Greenflares 

🎧

Summary: With Hermione and Ron always together, Harry's return to Hogwarts to complete his education isn't exactly fun. Somehow, it's his unlikely friendship with Malfoy that keeps him sane.

My review: long time no read, but I remember it being fluffy, feel good fic, with a bit of an angst, maybe. I liked it. 

Moments Like These      by  charmed310 

Summary: For years Draco and Harry have met twice a month in posh Muggle hotels to engage in a little extra-marital fun, no strings attached. Things take a turn when Draco admits his true feelings for Harry.

My review: OH GOD. YOU WILL BE SO ANGRY. YOU WILL FEEL SO FLUSTRATED, SO SAD. Maybe a little satified. Honestly I don’t remember if this ends well :))))))

(INFIDELITY H/G)

Where Your Treasure Lies      by    Queenie_Mab 

🎧

Summary:  Harry and Draco meet again through a journal created by the Department of Mysteries. They face many trials in life together and eventually discover that a love like they have is a force not even death can break.

My review: It’s really healing my heart a little. Okay, maybe a LOT.

Collect Your Courage by mervab

Summary: Potter needs control; Draco needs forgiveness. They shag; Lavender gives advice; they yell; Seamus makes muffins; they fight; and everyone else drinks far too much coffee for their own wellbeing.

My review: LOVELOVELOVETHISSOMUCH. Seamus is such an amazing character here, just like Lavender. They are great friends to Draco.  Everything is complicated and they are both oblivious idiots. 

[deadlydollies13]

The Potion Master’s Grace ch. 29

Grace said nothing, just staring at the ugly mark on Severus’ forearm. “Grace… I- I can explain,” Severus tried. His voice was drowned in shame. But, Grace never looked up.

   Why didn’t he tell me? she thought. Why would he do something like this? How could he do this? Was this what Sirius and Remus were talking about by “bad choices?” Because this isn’t just a “bad choice!” It’s a bloody crime! But he works for Dumbledore, so what does that mean? Is Dad good or bad? Is he a double-agent? I should hate him, Death Eaters murder Muggles like me! But, wouldn’t he have already killed me by now?

   Grace finally looked up at her father, whose head was hanging in shame. Phoebe looked like she wanted to say something, but the words wouldn’t come out. Grace just couldn’t bring herself to confront her father about this; she was still in too much shock. Grace let go of her tight grip on Severus’ wrist and asked rather nonchalantly, “Can I go back to classes tomorrow?”

   Severus looked up surprised and was almost speechless, “Uh, I don’t see why not? We’ll see how you feel in the morning.”

   “Okay,” Grace stood up, collected her things, and went to her room. “Goodnight!” she called before she closed her door.

   Severus sat there dumbfounded. He expected her to blow up, for them to fight, something! Instead, she was completely normal.

   “She’s just in a lot of shock,” Phoebe said, having heard Severus’ thoughts. “Don’t worry, she’ll snap soon.”

- 

   Hours went by and Grace couldn’t sleep. She couldn’t text her friends about it, although, some probably knew. Surely Draco knew since his father was Lucius Malfoy and definitely a Death Eater, now in Azkaban. Malfoy was probably the one who got Severus into all this. Draco had to know about his father and godfather. But, she didn’t blame Draco; he didn’t choose to be born into a family of Death Eaters, and he had denied his father and wanted nothing to do with Voldemort.

   Grace just felt so hopeless. She didn’t know what to do or who to talk to. She didn’t want her father to get in trouble, and while she trusted her friends, there was no safe way to tell them. Suddenly, she shot up in bed with an idea. She went to her desk, pulled out a piece of parchment and her quill, and began writing.

   Dear Sirius,

        Did you know my father was a Death Eater? Is that what you meant when                 you told me he made “bad decisions” in school? He has never mentioned                 it to me, until tonight when I saw the Dark Mark on his arm. Does he work                 for Voldemort? You-Know-Who? Then how is he working for Dumbledore?         I’m just very confused, shocked, and I don’t know what to do. You’re the                 only one I thought to go to without jeopardizing my father. He’s still my                 dad, I just don’t know how I feel.

        Sorry if I’m bothering you.

Also, how are you and Remus? You should join him when he comes to                 give us lessons.

   With love,

   Grace M.-S.

   Grace slowly opened her bedroom door, making sure the coast was clear. The apartment was dark, so that meant everyone was asleep. Clad in her pajamas and school robe, with her wand in one hand and letter in the other, she tip-toed her way to the door. “Lumos,” she whispered and her wand gave her light to guide her. Slowly and quietly, she made her way to the Owlry, careful to avoid Filch or Mrs. Norris, his cat.

   The Owls, though not asleep, were awfully quiet for it being their “day,” and it being so dark, it took her a while to find Luna’s owl Stardust. She gave her a little poke to wake her up. Stardust, a tiny gray owl with large, blue, almost violet, eyes, hooted when she spotted Grace. “Ssshhh,” Grace whispered. She didn’t want all of the owls making a commotion. “Can you deliver this for me? Please girl?” Stardust looked rather annoyed from being asked to do such a task while she was obviously busy eating, and searched Grace’s hands for a treat. “I’m sorry, I don’t have any treats with me. But, if you deliver this for me when you come back with a reply, I’ll give you so many treats.” Finally, Stardust stuck out her foot and Grace attached the letter. She gave a little nip to Grace’s fingers before flying away into the night. What a diva, Grace said to herself.

-

   Grace woke up the next morning, or rather, a few ours later, feeling much better. She dressed in joggers and a long sleeve t-shirt under her school robe that concealed what she was wearing. Severus was nervous that morning of how Grace would be, but he was surprised when she acted normal. She was smiling and said nothing of the night before. In some way, that made Severus more uneasy than if she was angry with him.

   They made their way to the Great Hall and when they entered, the Ravenclaw table erupted into applause. They hadn’t seen the girl who brought their Quidditch team to victory since the match on Saturday and she was apparently long-overdue the many “Congratulations” and “Great job” and cheers. It had also been since Saturday when she saw Draco. He immediately got up, ran past Severus who was making his way to the head table and wrapped his arms around his girlfriend, kissing her forehead.

   “Aww, I missed you too, Dray!” she smiled up at him.

   “You have no idea! I was so pissed when Luna told me they got to spend a whole two hours with you yesterday. And I haven’t seen you in days!” They walked hand in hand to the Ravenclaw table where the rest of their group was eating breakfast.

   “You were in class anyway,” they sat next to each other, Draco keeping an armed wrapped around her waist.

   “But not for lunch! Well, I actually got some work done during lunch, but still!”

   “Oh, you’re fine. We texted the whole time!”

   “Not the same!”

   Grace nibbled on some toast with jam and butter, going between the conversation with her friends and glancing at her father, who still looked on-edge.

   “She knows,” Severus whispered to Minerva.

   “What? Who?” Minerva looked at Umbridge.

   “Grace. She knows about-“ his eyes motioned to his left forearm.

   Minerva’s shoulders sagged and she gave Severus a sympathetic look, “Oh, I’m sorry, Severus. What did she say?”

   “Nothing, that’s the problem. She’s said nothing about it and I’m just waiting for her to blow up,” Severus and Grace glanced at each other at the same time. Grace smiled wide and waved, and Severus gave a small smile and nod in return. “See?” he turned back to Minerva. “She’s acting normal but it’s odd!”

   “Okay, what’s going on?” Luna asked Grace from across the table.

   “What do you mean?”

   “Something’s up. What happened between you and Severus? Phoebe mentioned something this morning about you two being ‘on-edge’ with each other but didn’t say anything more.”

   Grace shrugged, “I’m not on-edge with him, he is with me.”

   “But why?”

   “Did you two have a fight?” Draco asked.

   “No. Listen, I’ll tell you when I have everything figured out, okay? I’m still trying to process things and I had to reach out to a third-party for advice. God, it’s bright in here,” Grace reached into her bag and pulled out her sunglasses. She looked absolutely ridiculous wearing them inside, but she couldn’t help the fact she was so sensitive to light.

   “Is that why Stardust was gone?”

   “Well, I couldn’t very well borrow my dad’s owl. She shouldn’t be gone too long; I didn’t send her far.”

   “Where did you send her?”

   “To Sirius Black.”

   “Wait, you know Sirius Black?” Charlie asked.

   “Yes,” Grace answered. “But that’s not important! I asked him if he knew what I found out about my father.” Grace saw Luna shoot Draco a worried glance. “Do you two know too?!”

   “You had to have known I knew, Grace,” Draco said, hoping she wouldn’t be mad at him.

   “And I just overheard my father talking about it back before my First year, Grace.”

   Yes, Grace was annoyed. But, she wasn’t going to get angry with them; they hadn’t done anything wrong.

   Their day continued as normal, no one brought it up again. Severus could tell though, while he was teaching Grace’s class that morning, that she was starting to get closer to snapping. Still, he didn’t say anything and decided to play Grace’s game of pretending like it never happened.

   During lunch, Luna’s owl Stardust swooped in and landed at the Ravenclaw table between Grace and Luna. Stardust hooted impatiently at Grace and held out her leg for her to take the letter. “Wow, that was fast,” Grace took it and nudged her empty plate towards the owl to pick off of, just as she had promised.

   Grace,

    First off, the owl you sent is an absolute diva! She wouldn’t even let me                 take your letter until I gave her treats! I like her.

        Second, I’m so sorry you had to find out this way. Yes, this is what I was                 talking about when we spoke the other night. Honestly, I thought you                 already knew. It is an appalling thing to learn. I will leave it to Severus to                 tell you his story. As much as he and I don’t get along, I will say he isn’t a                 “monster,” Grace. I myself don’t know the full truth, but what I do know is                 that he loves you and he wouldn’t if he was really a Death Eater. I believe                 he was at one time, but then again, he does work for Dumbledore. There                 are possibly a lot of gray areas with this situation. I trust Dumbledore, so if      

he trusts Snape, and if Severus is such a wonderful father to you, I can                 assure you that you shouldn’t fret too much.

      Do not tell your father I said any of this. Actually, don’t tell him we talked at         all; I would like to live another day.

        Also, I will try my best to sneak in with Remus on Friday. I am eager to see         just how wonderful these Patronus charms of his students really are.

   See you soon, kiddo,

   Sirius (and Remus!)

   P.S. You are never a bother. If you ever need something or even someone to talk             to, I’ll be your confidant. It can get rather lonely here, anyway, with just Remus             and I, so any news is welcome. Especially gossip!

   “Are you all right?” Luna asked. She had skimmed the letter over Grace’s shoulder.

   “You should really talk to Severus,” Draco added from her other side, having done the same thing.

   “I’m all right, I’ve just got a lot to think about,” she folded up the letter, placing it back into the envelope and in her pocket.

   At the head table, Severus was curious what exactly the letter was.

-

   Though Sirius’ letter had shone a new light on the situation, and she was even rather surprised Sirius had written “kind” things about Severus, Grace couldn’t help the growing anger and hurt from boiling up inside her. She walked into Severus’ apartments and set her bag on the table, a look of annoyance on her face, when Severus started, “Grace-“

   “Why didn’t you tell me?!” she exploded. “How could you have just kept that from me? No secrets, no lies, remember? And you broke both of those rules!” Her voice cracked and tears started forming in her eyes.

   “Grace, I made that decision when I was a stupid kid! I did it to save my own skin and it cost the lives of the people I love!”

   “You still could’ve told me! Everyone else knows!”

   Severus sighed, “Grace, please stop yelling. Please?”

   Grace’s fists were clenched at her side, but she took a deep breath, “Do you hate Muggles?”

   “No!”

   “Then why did you join Voldemort?” Even Severus flinched when she said his name; the way she said it was too filled with venom and hate.

   “I wanted to learn more about the Dark Arts, and Lucius showed me I could do that if I joined them. It was a really stupid decision, Grace.”

   “You could’ve left.”

   “I couldn’t, though. Not if I wanted to live.”

   “Why are you working for Dumbledore then?”

   “When I learned the Dark Lord was going after the Potters I went to Dumbledore for their protection. However, I was too late. The Dark Lord, after killing Lily and James, cast the Killing Curse on their son, Harry, who was said to be the chosen one. But for some miraculous reason, Harry reflected the curse and the Dark Lord was defeated. Sirius, his godfather, couldn’t take him because he was standing trial for killing Peter Pettigrew and other innocent Muggles, Lupin wasn’t allowed because of the strict laws against werewolves. As much as I hated Potter, I would have taken the child in if it hadn’t been for me going under trial as well, but Dumbledore had agreed to pardon me and allow me to work as a Potions professor here so long as I spy on the Dark Lord’s actions for him. Dumbledore sent the baby to Lily’s sister’s family, and within a year, Harry was dead.”

   Grace stared at the ground, taking it all in, “So, you’re on the good side?”

   “Yes.”

   “Why don’t you tell Voldemort to screw it then? Is he back? Is that where you run off to sometimes? Because you never use the Floo, but when you go to 12 Grimmauld Place you use the Floo.”

   Severus nodded, “I’m a double-agent if that’s what you want to call it. But, I mostly feed the Dark Lord lies while I actually do help Dumbledore. I can’t just tell the Dark Lord to ‘screw off.’ He’d kill me, but worst he would torture and kill everyone I love. Finally, I have people I want to protect. You, Phoebe, Luna, even all of your friends would be in danger if he were to find out I’m your father. That’s why I didn’t tell you, Grace. I don’t want you to worry. I’m trying to let you lead as normal a life as you possibly can. It’s also why I wanted to keep our family a secret, not because I’m ashamed of you. If anything, you should be ashamed of me.”

   Grace shook her head, tears flowing down her cheeks, “I’m not ashamed of you, Dad. I never could be. You’re pretty brave for doing that, you know.” Before Severus could say anything, she rushed forward, wrapping her arms around him, “I’m so sorry, Dad! I’m sorry for yelling, I’m sorry for being mad, I’m sorry for thinking anything bad about you!”

   “Don’t apologize, Grace. You had every right to feel the way you felt,” Severus held his daughter close, thankful for how trusting and forgiving she was. She’s definitely a better person than I could ever be, he thought to himself.

[rideofbrunhelga]

nycc recap!

OK.

so now I'm on my computer finally ( I slept most of the day lmao ) so lemme give a rundown on my nycc experience!

thursday:

So. I got a SUPER late start because I barely slept this week due to work stress and just general stress about getting a bunch of stuff done prior to leaving for NY. I drove to Hamilton station in NJ and was told that their overnight parking was full so I had to drive to Trenton. Then I think because I was so in a tailspin just trying to get there when I was already running behind, I missed the train and had to wait for the next one. I got into NY around 2:30. I was meeting my BFF and she thought I wasn't getting in until 2:45ish so I waited for her outside MSG at Penn Station for a bit.

So, we finally made it to the con around 3:15 and it was packed. I couldn’t even believe it (this was both our first con). But right when we walked in, the shrine with spongebob pineapple was at the entrance and I got emotional (I was also tired so emotions were running high) but there was a huge line. Not for the shrine, but to meet Spongebob and Patrick who were basically in front of the shrine. The guy told us they would be leaving soon so we decided to come back later.

We walked around for a bit, we got a pic with BB-8. They explicitly told us not to touch him. And then after our pic I subconsciously used him to pull myself up LMFADJSAKLDJAKDJA. omfg the girl looked like she was ready to murder me but it was a complete accident the second I did it I was like OMG I’m so sorry. and I HIGH TAILED IT THE HECK OUTTA THERE.

While we were walking (by the way I felt like I couldn’t even stop to look at things because people were EVERYWHERE you felt like you had to keep moving), we saw Kevin Smith. I didn’t know who he was and I was standing right next to him and this guy ran up to him to get a selfie and he was like “thanks man it means a lot” I was like “who is this guy?” lmfao. Then I noticed there was security and the one said “he can’t take anymore pictures he’s on a tight schedule.” and my friend then realize it was Kevin Smith hahahahaha. Then we headed back to the shrine and spent a good half hour there. NO one was taking pictures with it. I have no idea why because it was so neat. The people at the Nickelodeon booth didn’t care that we were just like having a full on photoshoot with it so that was cool. 

We went outside and there was this Jigsaw escape room and we’re like “oh yay fun” but the girl was like “we’re closed for the day” so :(. Oh well. We bought overpriced drinks and sat on the floor for awhile to decompress before we met up with our other bff for dinner. 

We then had dinner at this ramen place on the upper west side. It was fun except so bizarre. This woman tripped over my friends chair, fell to the floor and for like 45 min she refused to get up from the floor. The owner looked panicked and kept asking to call the ambulance and she was screaming “NO!” “NO!” like 500x making a HUGE scene. She wouldn’t get up and was just sitting there. Someone eventually called an ambulance because like wtf? If you don’t think you can get up you can’t just sit on the floor of a restaurant the whole night? People were so uncomfortable and trying not to laugh because she was being so dramatic lmfao. When the EMTs came they basically were like “lady we’ve been doing this for years, your shoulder is not dislocated and we need to get you off the floor” so finally that was that. Then we went to have gelato and they made mine into a really beautiful flower I was like omg?? Then I went back to my friend’s apartment and we watched AHS: Cult which I think I cannot watch another episode of because it was so traumatic. 

friday

I woke up around 7. Took a shower and got ready for the panel. I knew I wanted to get there around 9 because I planned to sit through the first panel. In line I met two girls from the Facebook group and they were so sweet and so fun. We all sat together and managed to get front row. I’m not sure HOW that happened but I think it’s because the rows behind us were reserved so people assumed our row was (it wasn't). so that was so good! Especially considering I think I was in the first 100 people at Hammerstein and still managed front row. 

This girl and DJ were hyping the crowd and then the first panel started. It was for both Amazon’s Man in the High Castle and Electric Dreams shows, both Phillip K. Dick works. It was cool. It would’ve been cooler if Bryan Cranston was there but Liam Cunningham from GOT was there and Rufus Sewell. 

Finally that ended (lmfao). I swear. 85% of that crowd was there just for Arnold. There was 45 min in between panels. It got a lot more crowded for Arnold. The DJ was spinning some 90s tracks and people were dancing in the aisles lmfao. The hype girl then brought some people on the stage, one of them in Helga cosplay ( she was AMAZING, she was stomping around like Helga too we all were cracking up ) and two 14 yr old girls in Arnold apparel. She asked them how they got into Hey Arnold! since they were so young, and the one girl said from watching The Splat and we all cheered. The other girl was like “it’s a long story” I was like ok I guess? Then we played a game where the DJ played like two seconds of a 90s cartoon theme and the audience had to guess what it was. I also got another Arnold hat that they were giving away. 

FINALLY it was 12:15 and the panel began. 

It was hosted by Keely Flaherty (sp?) from BuzzFeed. She was cute. They started playing the music and introducing everyone. Everyone got a huge reception, especially Craig and Franny. I was freaking out. I started getting choked up the moment I saw Craig LMFAO. The audience was going NUTS. They spoke about doing the show all those years ago and if they remembered their first auditions (Toran revealed he didn’t originally audition for Arnold, he possibly auditioned for Stinky but wasn’t sure). Craig said they were doing the auditions where they made Ren and Stimpy. Then they discussed each of their characters at length. Craig noted he voiced all the animals including Abner, lol. Anndi also talked about how she was competitive like Phoebe, and tried to join Boy Scouts as a kid. 

It was revealed that Toran was playing a character of Che, who is Olga’s love interest in the film. We saw the character lineups that we’ve seen before as well as some new ones. Everyone was laughing with Rhonda’s newly revealed jungle outfit. Craig said she Rhonda is going to have a hard time in the jungle. Olivia was like “Thanks Craig. Do you hate me or something?” lmfao. 

They were showing new stills and every time a new one was shown the audience oooh’d and ahhh’d. Craig then introduced the trailer and I died. I really fricken died. I was a mess. The girls I was sitting with were choking up too. When the lights went back up, Franny looked over at Anndi with her hand over her mouth like she was ready to cry and they hugged each other, Anndi started crying. Most of us stood up and clapped and cheered. I CRIED EVEN MORE. Craig was like “let’s play it one more time!” and we all cheered lmao. So we watched it again, and I caught things the second time around I for some reason didn’t notice the first time. We then had a Q&A.

The one girl I was sitting with asked a really great question about if Craig incorporated any of the technology and animation styles from Dinosaur Train and Ready Jet Go into TJM. He seemed impressed by the question. People asked about Mr. Simmons sexuality, Gertie’s role in the film, Phoebe x Gerald, so on and so forth. Some people just complimented Craig on things that they loved about the show. There were a couple weird moments. Someone asked Craig how it felt when the first movie didn’t do well leading the series cancellation...I was like ??????? He then got up from his seat and was like “WELL AT LEAST WE’RE GETTING THE JUNGLE MOVIE NOW!” and we all cheered :D

SADLY the panel came to an end and I started crying again. It was so much fun. I can’t even express it properly here. The vibe in there was awesome and everyone was so excited and happy. They were taking a group picture on the stage and people then rushed up to the stage to shake Craig’s hand like a freakin rockstar (I have pics of it). It was so funny. He was like “guys I have to get off the stage” lmao. 

I then had a couple hours to kill between the panel and the signing so I headed over to Javits. It was MOBBED. I wasn’t sure how it could be worse than yesterday but it was lmao. I saw amazzzzzing cosplay. My phone was dying and my portable charger was drained but I was like whatever we can’t take pics at the autograph session anyway (which apparently was not enforced -_-) I sat for awhile and calmed my nerves down and then realized I had no idea where the signing was since it wasn’t clear in my email. I asked so many people and staff and NO ONE knew. I finally found it in the corner of the Autographing area. I saw the one 14 yr “it’s a long story” girl hanging around there and I was like “is this the line for Arnold?” and she was like “Yeah, but it’s for lottery winners ONLY.” I was like ‘I know I have a ticket.’ and she shot me this weird look and was like “You’re lucky.” LISTEN HONEY, YOU WEREN’T EVEN BORN WHEN THIS SERIES ENDED I’VE WAITED TOO LONG FOR THIS don’t sass your elders like that!

I got in line. I was pretty okay waiting. I realized Lucius Malfoy from Harry Potter and Pornstache from OITNB were doing signings at the booth next to us lmao. Finally the cast came out and I was okay, totally calm. Then I was up next and my heart started beating out of my fricken chest lord have mercy.

I can’t tell you everything because I feel like I blacked out a portion of it lmao. Craig was the first person you go up to. I said “Hi Craig.” and he said “Hi! What’s you’re name?” I said Andrea and he asked me to spell it. Then I was like “It’s really so nice to meet you.” he asked me if I watched the show growing up and I as like ?!?!??!?!?!@!@PUQIOERDuwqajdJALSDJAKLD YES. I told him how I made a petition when I was 11 and mailed it to Nickelodeon. He got a kick out of that and asked if I sent to the 1515 New York address, which I do remember was the address I had at that time. He’s like “so maybe in a way you influenced this” I was like, “I hope so!” and he asked me if I went to the panel and I was like ALDJASLKDJAKLJLK YES. I told him how the energy in the room changed once the first panel was over. I was like, “IT WAS COOL AND ALL BUT WHEN IT ENDED THE ENERGY CHANGED” and he loved that and said he heard the hollering from the audience backstage and asked the staff what the audience was cheering for and she said it was for them and he couldn’t believe it! I told him that it really meant so much to me to that this was happening. I told him I was beyond thrilled for him and couldn’t wait. He thanked me and I really felt like he meant it. He was sooooo nice and so interested in what I had to say. Franny was next to him and I said “Hi Francesca, so nice to meet you” And she asked how I pronounced my name and such. I told her I was like “I don’t know if you remember but a few years ago I emailed you about doing a paper on Helga.” She was like “YEs!” And I thanked for her for taking the time to do that and giving such great answers. She asked me if I graduated college, what I majored in, what I was doing now, what the class was for, etc. Like, me? Let’s talk about you? Then I spoke with Anndi, who asked if I would consider shortening my name to hers lol. She was very very sweet and warm and beautiful in person. I think I blurted something stupid to her and Olivia at the same time about Instagram like, “you guys are so cool!” LMAOOO. What a moron. 

Anyway they all were incredible and down to earth, they seemed just as excited to meet us as we were to meet them. Olivia asked if I went to the panel, and Anndi said “She was in the front row!” I think they asked this because prob some of the lottery winners were not even fans lmao. 

I’m missing some detail because like I said, I feel like I blacked out aldkjasdjasdkl, but it was AWESOME. The whole day was just so fun. It was beyond my expectations. The trailer was incredible - I really am so stoked now. Like, the movie looks so fun and action packed. I am so glad I decided to go because it was really something I will remember and hold close to me the rest of my life. I wish we could all have a screening to watch the movie together because it was too fun being in that room with all the fans experiencing that collectively. I am so grateful for the experience, and to be apart of such an incredible fandom that has such a wonderful cast and creator behind it. I could not ask for better. I feel so lucky.

I love you guys! I hope you enjoyed my coverage on ig story. I’m gonna image dump on here soon from my experience. I’m so excited, we are so close and it’s all feeling real now!

[amorremanet]

Arthur/moody, lucius/moody, lupin/snape?

the brutally honest ship opinions game

Arthur/Moody: ……okay, like, I have basically no positive feelings about Alastor Moody — I mean, I feel the same need to defend him from JKR’s ableist garbage that accidentally got me in too deep with Lockhart, but we are still talking about a guy who supports using Dementors on people and apparently dngaf about what someone’s done, just send ‘em all to fucking Azkaban (GOF ch. 30, the flashback of Moody we see in the first Pensieve scene)

who thinks that the best present you could give to a kid who’s lost his parents and just watched a classmate be murdered…… is going over a photo of the First War Order and telling him about how all of them died horribly and he doesn’t ever stop to think that this might not be the best idea (OOTP)

and who is legitimately less sensitive to other people’s needs and less dismissive of people who aren’t his exact model of “useful” than a literal fucking Death Eater one of the biggest points where Barty Crouch Jr. drops character in GOF is when he takes Neville to his office and gives him a pro-Herbology pep-talk, and goes, “so, hey, Longbottom, Professor Sprout said you’re super-good at this subject, why not pursue it,” because based on the actual canon about him? The real Alastor Moody would never do something like that.

Like, he might have the moment he has with Harry and Hermione, where he goes, “so, hey, both of you could be gr10 aurors if you wanted, you should think about it” because that, from Moody, would be a compliment, and Harry and Hermione more closely fit his own ideas of usefulness, but not so much the Neville moment)

—but seriously, do you hate him or something? Why else would you even dream of shipping him with Arthur Weasley? (okay, fine, I acquiesce that there is enough of a canonical basis for some people to roll with here, and I myself have made ships out of far less…… but seriously, why would you ship anybody with Arthur Weasley. Like…… wow, rude.)

Lucius/Moody: again, I’m not on the Alastor Moody fan-train or anything, but why would you even do this. Nobody deserves to be shipped with Lucius Malfoy, like? He’s not even an entertaining villain, he’s just pathetic. He’s a sad, pathetic fantasy-fascist who gets his kicks by bullying twelve-year-olds and torturing muggles who can’t defend themselves. He’s a complete waste of character space and forcing anyone to be in a ship with him is just unfathomably cruel

Lupin/Snape: meh, whatever. Like, it’s not my thing, but… *shrugs* meh?

Like, idk what you’re looking for here, nonny, but I’m guessing, based on the other two ships, that you’re looking for me to get cranky and ship-bashy and figured that Snu//pin was a good way to get there, since there are a lot of legitimate Problems with this ship in the text

But the thing is, I’m just under 900 years old (at least in fandom terms), and I remember the days back before HBP came out, when Snu//pin was the second-most popular Remus ship (after Wolfstar, to the surprise of no one), and was, in fact, so popular that it had its own private archive and got black-listed from most rarepair comms because it, “wasn’t really rare, just less popular than D//rarry, Wolfstar, Ro//mione, Dra//mione, H//inny, and J//ily”

—I mean, there was a short stretch before OOTP where I tried to make myself like it because there was a BNF whose art I loved, and she shipped Snu//pin, so I felt like I had to be missing something obvious and cool and because I was, like, twelve, I tried to make myself ship the thing. That didn’t work and I eventually just moved on, but one thing that I recall about the Snu//pin fandom that appears to still be more or less true, based on everything I’ve seen of the present-day Snu//pin fandom?

Is that they came out about the same as the Wolfstar fandom, in terms of how many shippers ignored or made excuses for #Problematic things about the ship vs. how many shippers work those things into the overall fabric of how they ship the thing, how many shippers LIKE the ship because of those Problematic parts and having the opportunity to explore them in fiction, how many shippers actively dive head-first into exploring those parts of the ships because that’s where they find the most engaging character interactions or whatever they’re into, etc.

For examples of what I mean when I say #Problematic things about the ships:

the fact that all three of them are self-loathing [human or werewolf] disasters who are often passively suicidal and either prone to acting out on those feelings (Sirius and Severus), or prone to repressing those feelings until they explode all over some innocent bystanders (Remus)

the fact that all three of them have suffered horrific abuse in their pasts — whether from their parents or other sources — and find ways to take it out on other people (Severus on his students, Sirius on Severus and Kreacher, and Remus on almost anyone who tries to get close to him, even as he makes it seem like he isn’t doing that)

Severus outing Remus as a werewolf because he’s upset and felt like punishing someone else for it, thereby leading to Remus tendering his resignation

the fact that Sirius assuming Remus had to be the spy would’ve been at least partially based on anti-werewolf prejudices, and Sirius still clearly had at least some of those prejudices on his own, because even if Peter totally manipulated them in his favor, there had to be something there for Peter to manipulate in the first place, so???

the fact that Remus doesn’t help shit anything, in any situation ever, with his habit of trying to weasel out of any Emotionally Difficult™ conversations and his tendency to mentally spin most situations so that everyone is going to leave him in the end anyway so it’s acceptable to shut down, close himself off, and pull stunts that more or less come down to, “totally up and bailing on everyone,” which is understandable, given his backstory, but dude, that doesn’t make it okay or helpful??

basically, “literally anything about the characters as individuals, or in terms of their interactions with each other — both past and present — that could potentially cause problems for either/both/any/all of them and potentially make the relationship unhealthy (or unhealthier than it already was, in the cases of Snu//pin and Snack because…… oh boy, let’s not even act like either of those — or any ship with Sev in it, for that matter — is ever going to be ‘healthy’ by any definition)”

So, like? Is Snupin #Problematic? Yes, definitely. Are some of its shippers prone to ship it in #Problematic ways? Oh, yes, absolutely (Hell, the BNF whose art I used to like even flat-out said things like, “Sirius would never be able to be there for Remus like Snape could” and… um? Even granted that this was pre-OOTP: ummm???)

But on the whole, Snu//pin shippers aren’t actually any worse about totally ignoring and/or excusing these elements of their ship than Wolfstar shippers are (and, actually, they might be doing better than a LOT of the present-day Wolfstar fandom, since I usually don’t see any more recently made Snu//pin that doesn’t grapple with at least some of the #Problematic elements of it — they don’t always do it well, but at least they’re trying, which counts for a lot, to me, because most people don’t even try — while most Wolfstar these days flat-out ignores all the #Problematic elements of Sirius and Remus as characters, and of their relationship, in the name of what often amounts to borderline-OOC caricatured fanon nonsense, so…)

(……Look, I love Wolfstar, and I have for longer than some people on this website have been alive. But I don’t love a lot of Wolfstar shippers, which has been the case since the beginning of my Wolfstar shipping

stayed the case when HBP came out and I was all, “Hey, guys? I don’t like this BS Remus/Tonks thing either, but can we NOT erase bisexuals or treat Tonks like garbage when we’re talking about it, it’s not her fault that Molly Weasley is a meddling nosy garbage buttinski who thinks it’s her job to play matchmaker to fully-grown adults who didn’t ask and don’t want her input,”

and is still the case as I’m over here, all like, “ugh, man, at least we used to have SOME people in this fandom who enjoyed reading Wolfstar angst, now it seems like nobody cares about anything unless it’s all fluff, all the time, with absolutely no room for anything else because god forbid you ever want to write about LGBTQ characters whose lives aren’t 5,000% perfect, that obviously must mean that you’re a gross fetishistic cishet and not, for example, a neurodivergent, mentally ill lesbian survivor who feels left out by the trend towards forcing every LGBTQ person to act like we’re happy, all the time, and to act like we’re only interested in fictional LGBTQ people who are perfectly 5,000% happy all the time

“and to decry any and all depictions of LGBTQ people being UNhappy as gross fetishistic straight people garbage even when they were actually created by and for LGBTQ people, only to be misappropriated by straight people, as if there’s no way you could possibly be LGBTQ and NOT feel ~used and maligned~ by depictions of LGBTQ people that are less than 5,000% perfectly happy, even when they are being created by other LGBTQ people, yeah? ……but yeah, no, clearly: the fact that I like angst obviously means that I am a straight person because no ~real~ LGBTQ person ever has any need for those ~gross negative feelings~ or fictional outlets for them, never mind how many LGBTQ people get excluded from our narratives and spaces by this bullshit bc lmao who cares amiright. ://”)

—anyway, my motto has been and remains, “It isn’t a question of WHAT you ship, it’s a question of HOW you ship it,” so hey. Snu//pin is not my thing (it’s not even as non-shippingly interesting to me as Sirius/Severus is, because I love how much those two hate each other while unwittingly being perfect foils for each other), but I don’t actually have any desire to ship-bash it and most Snu//pin shippers are okay with me because unless they’re actually doing anything that’s harmful to anyone else, it’s not my business what they ship

That said: “Snu//pin” is still one of the worst portmanteau ship names ever and it still sounds like a deadly virus or something, but *shrugs* Whatever, it’s not the shippers’ faults that their ship members’ names don’t smush up all that nicely