#apparently it's not too long and i finished tales of phantasia so i wanted to chill a bit before i start tales of destiny

[chronobreak]

i am finally giving zero escape 999 a go, it rocks so far

[dany36]

to try to get some sort of ORDER in the games I want to get through this year that are in my backlog, I’m gonna write them down here just for my own sanity.

after totk, i think this is what I’ll play…

finish sonic unleashed :)

future redeemed

tomb raider collection (probably will start with anniversary? these games are like 15ish hours long so it doesn’t sound that bad! really want to play tomb raider games from the "classic" era. love the reboot era to death so we'll see!)

ys viii (literally just found this game today but I really wanna play it! Gameplay looks fun and the graphics remind me of ps2 games. looks like it’s a 50+ hour game! :0)

tales of xillia 2 (been slacking on my tales games this year but apparently this game will break my heart?)

another sonic game maybe before jumping into another long game (thinking of sonic boom, i'm in my sonic era and honestly the gameplay doesn’t look that bad )

horizon zero dawn replay with ng+ (just want to experience the story and some sidequests again so I will probably do a Normal run with my overpowered armor/weapons so I won’t have to worry too much about the fighting/loot :y)

tales of berseria replay (PLEASE I NEED TO REPLAY IT THIS YEAR OR I WILL GO CRAZY)

CRAP I FORGOT ABOUT TALES OF PHANTASIA AHHHH (might have to leave out HZD then :( i really wanna finish this game! started playing it before burning shores came out and it was a lot of fun!)

so... between ys viii, tox2, hzd/top, and tob, i have 4/5 long games to get through this year (i don't think future redeemed would be TOO long...?). i think.....i can do it..........???

[love-fireflysong]

Day 25: Stars

Fandom: Tales of Phantasia Character(s): Chester Burklight, Arche Klein Words: 1582 Rating: General Author’s Notes: Hey, I’m back on my Archester bullshit. How you doing? Just a short one though. (never mind, it’s apparently my third longest of the eight(!!!!!) I’ve written so far)

It was starting to happen more and more often. The twin moons of Sylvarant and Tethe’alla were bright in the sky above them, and cast moonlight onto the plains where everyone had decided to camp that evening.

“The north star is that way!”

“That’s not even north, you idiot. The direction you’re pointing in is totally east.”

Arche stuck her tongue out at Chester. “Nuh uh! The north star is supposed to be the brightest star in the sky, that one is totally the brightest.”

“What? Who told you that? That’s not even a thing.”

“It totally is! I mean, how else do people find their way north when they get lost?”

“By using a compass.”

“Not everyone has a compass, moron.”

“Yeah, well you’re the exception, not the norm. Most sane people have compasses.”

Arche makes a face, and none to gently pokes Chester in the side with her finger. Who makes the same face back and gives her his own jab into the side. They continue their poking and prodding at each other, movements becoming more erratic as they almost start pushing the other to ground. The sound of Claus rolling over in his sleep with a loud snore makes them both freeze.

It’s only once they’re sure that Claus has settled back down for the night, that they sigh in relief that they haven’t been caught and return to their stargazing. The even return to their original positions they had been in before the childish fight: hands clasped tightly with their fingers tangled between them, and Arche leaning her head on his arm while he rested the side of his on top of hers.

It was starting to happen more and more often. Holding hands while the others were asleep. Leaning on each other like this. It was honestly kind of terrifying to Arche sometimes.Terrifying how nice this was. How nice it felt. 

Terrifying how much she was going to miss it when they had to go back home.

“Well, how do people who don’t have compasses find their way back then?”

“They follow the stars, genius.”

“And how exactly are they supposed to do that without a north star to guide them?”

Chester groaned and she didn’t have to look to know that he was rolling his eyes at her. “They use the constellations. Like if you follow the blade of the Midgards Knight, you’ll eventually come to Migdards.” He pointed towards a shape that kind of looked like a knight if she squinted real hard, and tilted her head all the way to the right. “Or that if you follow the stars then you can find the trunk of the Tree over in the south.” She followed his finger as it traced a line, or branch she supposed, in the sky that did eventually end at a thick cluster of stars. 

“And just why, exactly, do you know this?”

“It’s cause I was a hunter. Had to provide meat for Toltus and stuff. Be a crappy one if I got lost one night and couldn’t find my way back home.”

“I mean you’re a pretty crappy one already... miss more shots with your bow then you hit.”

“Please, my accuracy is way better then yours. Don’t think I didn’t notice your Cyclone earlier. You didn’t hit a single thing with it.”

“Jackass.” Arche squeezes his hand when she says it.

“Ditz.” Chester squeezes back, but then rubs a thumb lightly across her knuckles.

Both of them fall silent for a moment, not doing anything to bring attention to their hands. If they don’t mention it, then they don’t have to talk about it. This is easier. Will make things easier when they have to separate after all of this is said and done.

It won’t. They both know that. They both don’t care.

“Well, if there’s no north star, then how do people find their way north without a compass.”

“It’s simple moron. They just have to find the Hole.”

“I’m sorry, the what? You sure that someone wasn’t just playing a dirty joke on you?”

Chester sputters indignantly and Arche laughs, taking advantage to make herself more comfortable against his arm. If the movement counts as snuggling closer, well, that can be their little secret. Just another to add to what she’s pretty sure is a goddamn cauldron at this point.

“No! No one definitely was! Look,” he gestures towards an area that she assumes is the north. “You see that small round cluster of stars over there, but with the really weird black space in the middle. That’s the Hole. Just keep walking towards the Hole and eventually you’ll fall in and end up home. That’s how the story goes.”

Arche does see the blank spot he pointed out, but she narrows her eyes contemplatively at it. “That’s not right,” she says in the end.

“Oh really? I’ve been getting the idea that I’m the only one of us that has any idea how to read the stars in the first place. What makes you think that I’m wrong about this?”

“Well, cause your always wrong obviously, but that’s not what I mean.” She bats away the hand that came to pinch her nose. “I’m serious, Chester. There’s something wrong there!”

“Like what?” She can hear the annoyance in his voice but ignores it easily.

“I don’t know! Like there’s something missing, or something.”

“Wow. Eloquent.”

“Shut up.”

Chester sighs above her head, and it just makes her frown harder. “There’s nothing missing, Arche. The stars have always looked that like, ever since I was a kid.”

“That’s it! The stars! The stars are all wrong! There’s supposed to be a star in the middle there, that’s why it looks so empty!”

“The only thing empty around here, is the inside of your head. What are you even talking about? There’s never been a star there.”

She’s shaking her head hard at this point. “No, that’s where the north star used to be, I’m sure of it! It was how I always used to find my way home when I finished visiting Rhea in Hamel. As long as I kept that star to my back, I knew I’d make it home eventually.”

“I’m being serious too! There’s never once been a star there. I would know! I’ve been following them since I was kid.”

“And I’ve been using that one since I was a kid, too! How do I know that you’re not just making all of this up to mess with me?”

Chester’s started to run his free hand down his face. “Cause Cress got the exact same lessons as I did growing up. You can check with him tomorrow and he’ll say the same things I have.”

Arche gasps she sits up straight in realization. “That’s it! We can ask Claus. Let’s just wake Claus up and he can confirm everything. I know that he’ll agree with me that there’s a star missing!” She starts to stand up and walk towards where their summoner is sleeping, only to get pulled back by Chester.

“We can’t wake him up, Arche.”

“What? Why not?” She looks at him in confusion, at the panicked look in his face, and groans “Oh, I get it. You just don’t want to get proof that I’m right, and you’re wrong.”

“No, that’s— that’s not it.” She’s surprised at how red his face has turned, but follows his eyes to their still clasped hands, and finally understands. Her face quickly turning a shade to match his own. 

“Oh.” She can’t wake Claus up, because then there’d be too many questions, and they don’t have the answers to any of them. She can’t wake Claus up, because Chester was supposed to be on watch alone tonight. She can’t wake Claus up, because she’s supposed to be sleeping right now too.

They’d have to explain why she’s up with him, and they haven’t even explained that to themselves.

“You can ask Claus about it tomorrow night.”

She nods slowly, and Arche’s not sure who made the move first, but they’ve both dropped the other’s hand. They’re both not looking at each other anymore either, Chester stubbornly staring at the bright blue moon of Sylvarant while Arche looks towards where her makeshift sleeping bed is set up, carefully holding her hand in her other one. They’re both way too close to touching on what ever this thing between them is, and neither are ready for it.

“I-I should get going to bed.”

“Good idea, I need to wake Cress up for his turn at watch soon anyway.”

With that, they separate, neither looking over their shoulder at the other, intent on putting an end to this night as easily as possible.

Arche never does remember to ask Claus about the missing north star the next evening, never remembers to ask him about it any night actually. In fact, she doesn’t really remember about it until after Dhaos is killed, and she’s back home with her dad. When she leaves the house one night and looks up to see the bright star nestled right in the center of the round cluster that Chester had shown to her one night. Exactly where it was supposed to be.

The sight of it hurts Arche way more then she thought it would. She always knew that the distance between her and Chester was going to hurt. She just didn’t think it was going to hurt this much. 

[memorydragon]

Tagged by @subtextsays   I'd planned to do this a few days ago, but the Chinese Government said No.  Also, tumblr is now giving me a major issues actually typing right now, so we'll see if I make it.  Seriously though, the fuck tumblr.  Your post function is nigh unusable right now.

🍓 what do you prefer to be called name wise?

Mem or Memory.  I answer to both irl, mostly because people who know my real name tend to just be like, no, you're Mem.  I go with the flow since there's really only one name I refuse to answer to anyway.

🍓 when is your birthday?

Same day as Dr. Suess.

🍓 where do you live?

South China.  Yeah, it's been a fun year, let me tell ya.  

🍓 Three things you are doing right now?

Fighting desktop tumblr because fuck it.  I never thought I'd say that the mobile version actually has more functionality, but 2020.

Drinking tea.  Because I need tea right now.

Trying to navigate an online teaching system that is entirely in Chinese.  It's going about as well as you'd think.  

🍓 four fandoms that have piqued your interest right now?

I'm currently in a Tales rabbit hole right now.  My Vesperia playthrough has awakened things that I thought had long past and Crestoria is tempting me with a scene of Vicious and Aegis that my brain wants me to write.  Because, ya know, there's only like, ten fics in the whole tag for Crestoria right now, so between a ten year old game and a gatcha mobile phone game, I'm totally getting a huge audience for these fics.  -_-;;;  Though the Tales game I'm currently playing is actually... not going to end up as a favorite, to be honest.  Graces isn't vibing with me at all.

DC is still on my mind as well.  Vesperia just kind of highjacked a few things.  

Whizzy, you need to join me at Relena's birthday party.  You really should.  XD  And it seems I'm not the only one who's trying to drag you down to it again.  

Not sure if I really have a fourth one at the moment?  Mostly because Tales is actually more than one fandom, I'm just grouping them all together.  I'm also currently on the fence of what to do after I finish Graces, because on one hand, I will have a shiny new gaming laptop tomorrow which I can replay the psx version of Phantasia on (or even find Destiny or Eternia on for replaying?  It's been so long and I've needed to replay those games for a while now).  On the other hand, I also have Xillia, plus the other PS3 Tales games I can buy (Xillia 2, Hearts, and apparently both Symphonia games I need to replay) and I've kind of wanted a replay of Zesty and Berseria.  And given how long all of these fuckers are, this ends up being a massive conundrum.  

🍓 how is the pandemic treating you?

So, you know how a lot of people have had major stress because their job stopped paying them properly and/or were layed off, had money issues, and anxiety/depression combo?  Yeah, I've had all of that several months in advance from everyone else, then had to watch as other people also went through all of that, knowing they were just starting what I was going through.  It's not been fun.  At least China has actual control over Covid at the moment though, so I managed a quick trip to Shanghai which was fun.  If it weren't for the pollution, I'd love to live in Shanghai, not gonna lie.  The city made a pretty big impression on me and seems to be more of a San Francisco/Austin sort of vibe.

🍓 song you can’t stop listening right now?

Honestly, screaming/crying through the lyrics of Rent was how I survived quarentine.  The lack of getting paid and living through disease combo plus a side of Queer really worked for me.  Right now though, I've kind of been on a Carole King kick?  Tapestry has been in my head a lot.  

🍓 recommend a movie.

Willow.  Because Willow is just, so good.  

🍓 how old are you?

Too old to deal with the fact that my new job wants to force me to live on the 7th floor with no elevator.  Yeah, trying to work around that right now.  

🍓 school, university, occupation, other?

University professor now.  That's right, I'm now working at a University. May be temporary though, depending on the aforementioned 7th floor business.  Mostly because I like breathing, which I can't do very well in this climate's humidity while exercising.  It'd be different if like, the stair well was air conditioned (I'm out of shape and would hate it, but I could breath), but if the building don't have an elevator, I know the answer to that...

🍓 do you prefer hot or cold?

Cold.  Yes, I live too close to the equator for my own good.  Sadly, until the pollution problem goes away, it's as far north as I can live in China.

🍓 name one fact others may not know about you.

I...  always never have any idea what to say to this sort of question.  I don't really hide things.  Like, I'm sure things just, haven't been mentioned, but like, I never know what those are?  Like, the top things I can think of that I just don't talk about often are that I travelled around the world preforming with Up With People and that I love murder mysteries (not true crime.  Give me a proper Agatha Christie).  

🍓 are you shy?

No, not really.  I'm quiet a lot of times, which is very different from shy, even though a lot of people don't understand that.  I've never had a problem chatting with new people or what not, but in a large group if I don't have anything I actually want to add to a conversation, I won't talk very much.  Which doesn't mean I'm not listening, or that if I have something to say, I won't try to speak up, but just...  don't really need to most of the time.

🍓 what are your pronouns?

she/her

🍓 any pet peeves?

Another question I never really know how to answer.  Like, I'm sure I have them.  I'm just generally pretty easy going.  At the moment, I suppose female characters who's defining characteristic is that they're in love with a dense protag.  Anaden and Graces have been giving me an overdose on those lately.

🍓 what’s your favorite “dere” type?

...I think the only one I actually know is tsundere and I wasn't aware there were more than that.  

🍓 rate your life 1-10. 1 being really crappy and 10 being the best you could ever be.

5ish.  Was doing better, but then now on top of everything else, I also need to buy a new phone... that's not from China.  Which is a lot more difficult when I can't hop the boarder.  I actually have to return the phone I just bought because despite what they promised me, googleplay doesn't work at all.  So now I have to figure out how to buy a Hong Kong phone without actually being able to go to Hong Kong.

🍓 what’s your main blog?

Random.

🍓 list your side blogs and what they are used for.

I only have Vengeancedragon, which is used incredibly rarely and is mostly for contemplating Vengeance.  

🍓 is there anything you think people need to know about you before becoming friends with you?

A friend once told me that the fact my mother put Spock ears on me and took me to a scifi convention when I was 6 months old explained everything about me.  I'm not sure if it explains Everything, but it does explain a lot.  XD