#apparently it works for dog too (although I didn't try it)

[dribs-and-drabbles]

5. turn the sound volume up

[yanderismo]

Yandere Platonic Superman Concept/Idea (?)

BRO, BRO, I DON'T KNOW IF I LOVE OR HATE MY MIND FOR GIVING ME IDEAS THAT I'LL NEVER START OR FINISH. But okay, I have an idea for a platonic yandere Superfam, maybe it involves Batfam or the entire DC universe. I think this is more platonic yandere Superman. Let's go. (using the translator, be kind to me please 😭) 

— Imagine that you are originally from the Injustice universe. You were a neutral young/teen heroine who wasn't at all interested in siding with Batman or Superman. Well... that neutrality of yours had consequences, and now, somehow, Superman and Batman were in a bloody tug of war to get you on their side. And you are the cable they are selfishly pulling. And one day that cable would break, and that's what happened to you, you broke it. So broken that I would consider it irreparable. 

— But luckily for you (bro, are you lucky?), after so much physical and mental suffering, you ended up in a way that I won't explain, in the original DC universe. In other words, no superheroes is crazy tyrants. Too bad you don't know that (yet).

— You were living as if the world was a danger to you (just like it was in Injustice). But you discovered that you were REALLY in a different universe or timeline when you met Lois Lane, the woman who drove Superman insane after her death. And it shocked you, you thought maybe you had gone back in time. And as reckless as it was, you felt hope that you could stop the future of Injustice from happening, stop Lois Lane from being murdered! After all, you were still a hero, even if you had probably lost half of your original universe's neurons.

 — So you made a decision. You decided to protect Lois Lane! You practically become her protective shadow. Being noticed wouldn't do any good, and for SO FEAR of being confronted by Superman/Clark for apparently stalking his wife, you stopped watching her when Clark showed up and you went back when Clark left. (In your head, this Superman is the same Superman from Injustice, just before Lois' death happened). You were wary as hell of all the heroes. Anyway, a lot of trauma caused by Injustice.

— And I believe that Lois, even if she was a civilian, would notice that she was being watched (or maybe you're just not very good at stalking because you're a very young heroine). Whatever it is. Lois noticed and she became cautious (she is a journalist, there are many people who may not like her to the point of committing atrocities), as you could be a threat to her life. Although you haven't revealed yourself as any threat so far.

 — But let's suppose there were events in which she was in danger (actually, it was just something like shelves falling, preventing her from being run over, preventing some rabid dogs from biting her, small things), events in which you managed to remain hidden, however Lois knew it was You, her strangely protective stalker. Lois was trying to know your intentions and work it out for herself, so she didn't say anything about it. If this is something much more than she can handle, Clark can always lend a little help. 

— But on another one of those times when she was in danger, you desperately saved her (the situation was quite dangerous, more than normal), asking if she was okay and everything. Lois was surprised, you were surprised. Before you know, the idea of staying in the shadows went down the drain. You were almost begging (you were begging) her not to tell anyone that you were persecuting her (protecting her), you didn't want her to report you to some authority (that would only hinder your mission) or worse, report you to Superman. You said, stammered, that you were just protecting her. Wanting to make sure Lois didn't feel threatened and report you. 

— The desperation, the panic in your voice, seemed too young for Lois to feel comfortable. You were like a scared child, you looked very much like just a scared child, and that made Lois uncomfortable but at the same time... motherly. If you wanted to hurt her, you would have done it already. You at least accomplished one thing: making Lois not feel threatened by you.

 — The other thing you couldn't do was stop Lois from telling Clark about you. Look, I'm sure Lois didn't mean it, it's uncomfortable to be watched almost every day, but also, since she discovered you, she's been quite worried about you.

 — And Clark is all worried, like, "What?? My wife is being stalked??? Oh wait, my wife is being stalked and protected. Well, that's still very worrying, I'm definitely going to check it out for myself." Furthermore, Lois insisted that he be gentle when approaching you. And Lois saying this to him made him even more intrigued. 

— He tried to approach you just as Clark Kent, just to know how you would react around a seemingly civilian person, think of it as a method to read your character (he didn't want to confront you as Superman in a careless way. After all, who wouldn't Does he act nice or change to a more pleasant personality around Superman?)

— Needless to say, Clark was surprised and confused when you looked at him like he was the greatest terror of your life before simply running away from him. He recognized that look, only villains who were traumatized after a confrontation against him have that look (but the you look was much, much worse than that). That day, you didn't chase Lois.

 — Clark suspected you knew his secret identity. There is no longer any reason for you to have reacted like this. 

— lol, that day Lois noticed the absence of the feeling of being watched and scolded Clark for scaring you. Although it wasn't his fault, he apologized. He really didn't mean to scare you ;( You were gone for a few days after that. But of course, you still had to protect Lois in her everyday life. Even if you were scared. 

— Anyway, it didn't matter how softly, friendly Superman approached you next time. You ran, or at least tried to run. Do you really want to bet on who is the fastest? He easily caught you and held you by your forearm. And that was enough to make you scream, cry, struggle and finally, shrink as much as possible.

— And Superman was all confused, he wasn't even hurting you or squeezing you hard. His voice was also friendly. If anything, it made him even more worried. Add the fact that you appear to be very young and his paternal instincts kicked in. 

— To his surprise, you pulled out a knife. Something like that couldn't hurt Superman, of course not. But who said the knife was meant to hurt him? Let's say you picked up the knife and tried to slit your own throat as a last resort escape. (What did you go through with Superman from Injustice to the point that you tried to commit suicide just to escape him?) 

— Superman was surprised and then horrified. He immediately knocked you unconscious before you cut deeper into your throat. Now with you unconscious, you seemed more vulnerable and fragile than you should have been. Now he understood why Lois was worried about you. (You know, if Batman can adopt multiple children, why couldn't Superman...? You seem like a good kid and even Lois agrees with that. Conner and Jon would definitely like to have a sister) 

— Superman wondered what happened to you that made you reach the point where death was a usable route. He wanted to question you personally, but the moment he confirmed that you knew his identity (you acted the same way when he approached you as a civilian. He was the only one to receive this reaction from you and no one else), this matter became the subject of the Justice League. Discovering the identity of a superhero and pursuing someone close to that superhero was not going to be taken lightly. Who's to say you don't also know the identities of others? Although Superman wants to deal with you alone, he doubts he'll get any information out of you with you yelling and screaming. So he took you to the justice league. 

— Batman can definitely help you solve this.

(Imagine the anguish it would be to probably have to get used to people having the same appearance and the same voice as your captors in Injustice. Imagine them acting all soft after finding out you come from a universe where the heroes are corrupt and broke you😩)

Notas: I leave the rest to you. Or to any author who wants to use this idea (I beg you, some author write a Yandere platonic Superman/Superfam fic😭 They could even add other platonic Yanderes like Batfam, it would be so interesting 🙏😭)

(I just realized that the one who acted the most Yandere was Reader herself, lol)

[creative-kny-fics]

here me out… Lee! Giyuu..ler! Obanai’s snake!!!! Maybe like navel, and neck tickles 💗💗

Kaburamaru and Kanzaburo have something in common, they are both not human but they have their ways of making Giyuu laugh

Ler: Kaburamaru (Obanai's snake)

Lee: Giyuu Tomioka

Don't you find it curious that, even if you hate a person with almost all your soul, your pet, in some way, has established a bond with them?

Well, this was the case with Kaburamaru and Giyuu. 'I want to understand... What the hell did Tomioka do to my snake, it doesn't even hiss at him when he gets close to me!'

'Iguro-San, Tomioka-San is a good person... Maybe if you spent more time with him, you...' 'No, I won't, you've got to be kidding me with that Mitsuri. I will never do it, end of discussion...'

Obanai was grunting all the way, how was he convinced?! First he had to accept that Oyakata-Sama asked him to try to be her friend, then Gyomei followed, then Rengoku, Shinobu without hesitation and now also Mitsuri?!

Was Tomioka a witch or something? How was he able to get people to "connect" with him?

'Okay Obanai, you're only with him for about 5 minutes and then you can leave. Make up an excuse, anything to give him a visit... Well, here we go...', Obanai knocked on the door, no one answered

It was the worst thing that could be happening to Iguro, he walked so much just for Tomioka not to be home?!

Although, he didn't want to spend quality time with Tomioka, so he could leave!. 'Iguro? What are you doing here?', plan cancelled.

'Oh well, I need to talk to you. It's about... It's about... Shinobu! Yes, Shinobu!'

'Is everything okay with Kocho?' 'Do you think we talk inside?'

Giyuu looked at him confused, but agreed, if it was something that had to do with Kocho, then it must be important. 'And well? What's wrong with Kocho?'

'With Kocho? Oh yeah! It's just that, well I don't know, it seems like she's starting to have feelings for someone, I don't know... You know her, so... You know something?'

'Coming from Kocho, I find it impossible. She's not willing to look for a romantic relationship, she's too focused on her work, so it's probably not that', perfect, time to go.

Iguro laughed, sarcastically and without any grace, as he "bowed" and left the estate, forgetting something, or rather, someone...

'Perfect, I spent time with him. And if Mitsuri asks, you will tell her that we have talked, did you understand Kabura-...Maru...?'

Obanai looked everywhere, he checked his haori, inside his uniform and there was nothing.

But if it wasn't with him, then... Oh no... Nooo... It's got to be a fucking joke... Kaburamaru can't be with...

'I think Obanai didn't notice you, Kaburamaru,' Kaburamaru nodded and rubbed its head against Giyuu's hand.

Giyuu didn't know why some animals found his presence comfortable, perhaps because he was affectionate but at the same time he was quiet and didn't bother their ears as much?

Maybe that would explain why dogs almost always bite him or run away from him, ironic. 'Well, how is that going? Have he already decided to take the step with Mitsuri? Is he still shy? Woah, I thought he already had the courage to tell Mitsuri that he likes her, well, I won't judge. Maybe he plans to do something special to tell her, I know he loves Mitsuri very much,' Kaburamaru nodded.

Obanai burst into the estate, forcing his way in while shouting his pet's name, only to find it around Giyuu's neck. 'But... BUT WHAT THE FUCK KABURAMARU?!'

'Obanai, don't shout so much, you might scare Kaburamaru...' 'Okay okay, sorry, let's go Kaburamaru.'

Kaburamaru would usually obey Obanai, but no, this time he stayed with Giyuu, apparently annoyed by the scream his owner gave and by having forgotten. 'Kaburamaru, don't act like a stuck-up kid, come on! We agreed that we would eat with Mitsuri!'

'Hey Kaburamaru, I think it's best that you go with Obanai, I don't think you want to make Mitsuri wait for your arrival'

'You see? Come here, you foolish serpent!', with even more reason, Kaburamaru did almost nothing to Obanai.

Instead, he began to rub his head against Giyuu's neck, while his tail slithered and moved his ears, which out of instinct, Giyuu covered as a smile formed on his face.

'Oh please! Are you trying to make me jealous?!' 'Oba-Obanahai! Dohon't yell! Ehehehehe!! Ka-Kaburahamaru!!'

'Please Tomioka, are you going to tell me that shit tickles you? Come on Kaburamaru, show him what you really have!'

Putting aside that it was upset with its owner a few minutes ago, it agreed, quickly slipping into Tomioka's uniform before he could do anything to get him out. 'Hehehey!!' Cohomehehe ohohon!! Nohohot my sihidehehes!! Plehahasehehe!!'

'Kaburamaru, try his ribs! You might get a good reaction!'

'Co-cohomehehehe ohohon!! Not there! Nohohot theherehe!! Please!!', Giyuu immediately attempted to unbutton his uniform, but only earned a few rubs on his navel. 'Hahahaha what's wrong Tomioka? It's too much?'

'Yehehes!! Oh gohohosh!! Plehahasehe Obahanahai!! Stohohop this!' 'Pffft, well, okay. Come here Kaburamaru, it's time to go!'

Kaburamaru stopped, wrapping himself around Obanai's wrist as he approached.

'Woah, looks like you have someone who makes you laugh whenever you feel bad, huh?' 'NOT A SINGLE WORD OF THAT!!'

'Okay... Well, I hope you visit me again soon.'

Obanai raised an eyebrow as he let out a snort, laughing after his face turned red from the embarrassment of his words, that's not what he meant!

'Heh, so that's why you were so attached to him now, huh? Maybe this visiting thing isn't so bad... And if you try to tickle me right now, I won't give you a mouse for dinner...', Kaburamaru bit Obanai lightly, he didn't like threats.

And if you're wondering, Kaburamaru made sure that Obanai was completely cheerful while he had his date with Mitsuri.

[richeeduvie]

Can someone please explain to me the whole baby thing? And dog bone au? And all these aus im so confused

DOG AND BONE!AU BASICS

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.

This is asked every five months and I'm happy to explain it each time! I'll put it in the pinned post! This is a long one so sorry yall

So Dog and Bone is the title to the AU for a self-insert x Roman Roy fic compilation. There's no actual series yet…sorry, I know! How long has it been? But these fics range from entire one-shots that center around a plot that can lead into another one-shot/drabble, with the content of said piece becoming important to the whole AU, to just cute, fluffy or smutty drabbles and blurbs. Most of them are based on requests. Your request could become a big part of Dog and Bone!

BABY

Baby is the name for the self-insert. Fics will flip from a second person to third person POV, so you'll see her referred to as 'Baby' a lot. I don't consider her an OC because there's no and will never be a physical description of her and to be honest, I only started to referred to her as Baby so I could write third person POV fics when I'm lazy and don't want to go heavy in internal monologue, which is what I do for second person POV fics. I never use 'Y/N' for her or any self-insert. But many see her as other people and not themselves and I love that too!

Personality-wise, you'll find her to Roman's soulmate. Although she is still a victim of being out-of-touch due to her wealth, she's managed to be kind and respectful and just something that Roys don't have outside of her. She's the ultimate nepo baby with Logan just giving her some vague career path at Waystar to keep her around. She mostly works in marketing and spends her days with Tom and Greg. So, the story of DAB (lol). Baby is the childhood best friend of Roman (and Shiv). In the AU, Baby's biological father was Logan's best friend and business associate. She met the Roy family when she was five and when Roman when almost seven. She was meant to be the best friend of Shiv, but Roman stole her one day when Shiv when to get more toys and baby Baby was on the swings. His sister is still pissed about this to this day.

Nothing much has been mentioned of Baby's bio dad just yet, but it was a one-time thing (so understandable is yall don't remember) that we see Logan giving Baby the medal her father gave him after his funeral. He's dead and apparently fought in a war, or maybe just liked collecting medals as much as Logan did.

So, facts about the dead dad:

Maybe was a veteran

Was hinted to have given Baby an eating disorder

Died when she was eight

Possibly kept her away from her mother

Logan's her godfather, but it was Frank to take her in after her dad had passed. Frank ON TOP!!!! PAPA FRANK!!! Baby's mother is very distant and she's really only seen her for a few holidays throughout her childhood. I've always imagined her to be those wealthy hippies feigning spirituality and did maybe try to get Baby in terms of custody, but didn't try a lot - not even after Baby's father died. So, Baby gets to stay with the Roys with Frank being her guardian. With this, it's just co-dependency and possessiveness growing.

Roman and Baby don't really have friends outside of each other. They do everything together and eventually start doing relationship sort of things together. They take each others virginities. Roman gets panicky and painful in the muscles if Baby has to leave him for more than three days. It's great, but nothing's official.

They live this way until Roman gets with Tabitha.

Now, you may be thinking 'Why does he begin a relationship with Tabitha if he's so possessive and seemingly satisfied with the situation he has with Baby?' Well, I have two fics that'll help you to explain Roman's stupidity:

Why Does Rome Still Date Tabitha (They Don’t Have Sex, but Still) Kendall Wins!AU Confession

The latter of the two is a bit more personal and truthful for Roman. It can be noted that as much as I am a GerriRoman supporter, their relationship does not happen in the DogandBone!AU. Only because one, frankly, I don't know how to or have the desire to thread it throughout the story because I already kept Tabitha's plotline…which is Roman's downfall. You will see. And two, you'll find that Roman and all of the Roys, really, have a lot of themselves changed all because they have one genuine friend that's cared and loved them since childhood so that big part of Roman's plotless plot-time in canon is gone here. Grace didn't happen as well because Jesse Armstrong said so lol.

As I said, the genuine friend line applies to all of the Roys (excluding Logan, except for his AU…), but it really applies to Kendall. Going back to the point where Baby and Roman are fourteen/fifteen and fifteen/sixteen, he gets sent away to military school. I made it so he's only there for two years to which Logan just doesn't care to send him there anymore because I want Baby and Roman teenage puppy and needy love for as much as I can get it. During this time, Kendall has this belief, this kindness to take in Baby when she's at her loneliest.

and…so…Kendall and Baby's whole thing?

The link above sums up their whole situation but I'll elaborate a bit more here because there's Tern Haven. Tern Haven happens in the OG!DogandBone!AU and KendallWins!AU, the grooming situation happens in every AU.

Of course, Roman comes back and Baby sobers up for the most part and leaves groomer Kendall's ass in the dust! It's when Roman starts dating Tabitha decades later that Kendall, who never actually made a move on Baby, brings hell and tragedy to the family. Baby's not so keen on continuing to have sex and the weird thing she has with Roman as he is with Tabitha around, so she becomes lonely and thoughtful in the need to reconnect with friends, maybe start dating herself. She's there during Tern Haven and can't go to Roman's room to hang out, Tabitha's there. She doesn't bother Shiv and Tom, she could talk with Frank, maybe? Maybe, but she makes her way to Kendall's room.

And whatever high horse Kendall put himself on for not doing anything with Baby, maybe not being in love with her - or at least having no awareness about it, whatever was starting with Naomi, it's gone when Baby enters that room.

Again, Tern Haven happens in Kendallwins!AU and the OG!AU. The only difference is that after, Roman is either successful in pulling Baby away from Kendall, or he isn't. This is where it can get confusing as it can with all the AUs because there's so many little splices of moments within content that really helps you understand how things happen but I can say that the Kendallwins!AU is just sad, scary, and dark.

But enough of that!

OG!DOGANDBONE!AU

After Roman's successful in getting Kendall away from Baby, he immediately breaks up with Tabitha and they heal from what happened. Kendall declines quickly during this. Logan dies and they get married after the GoJo sale. They have Baby Jr. On occasion, we'll have fun and write them having two more kids, Baby Jr Jr and Roman Jr, but they aren't canon - or they at least would get a canon fic like Baby

FICS TO HELP: Romulus Sneakers | Dad Frank feat. Baby Roman Call Them Brothers Back in Town Bone and Her Heart Roman’s a Friend Stealer While you were sleeping Touch Me (I'm Sick) Date Death | Part One Date Death Part 2 Babied (He Loves It) Violet, Blue, Green, Red To Keep Me Out Phone Call Home Baby Baby in “I went to Market” Baby in ‘Too Much Birthday’ After the GoJo Sale Telling Roman She's Pregnant

BABY JR

Baby Jr is an unrealistically perfect angel of a child that belongs to Roman and Baby in their AU and was born a preemie with a slew of health problems, but because I love her so much, it's becoming a running joke for her to just exist in every AU, somehow. if Baby's there, Baby Jr's there. She's named fittingly. You'll see her a lot in smaller blurbs and fics. Another running joke is that she hates Kendall in every AU, though she's barely mentioned outside of the OG! and Loganwins!AU.

JUST MY FAVORITE BABY JR FICS:

Baby Baby's First and Last Day at School Bear Baby Jr! Baby Jr Doing Something Dangerous Connor Taking Baby Jr Fishing Baby Jr seeing Baby Roman with Glasses

VARIATIONS OF THE OG!AU

They aren't mentioned a lot anymore because we don't get so serious about them and it was more just to have fun with the story, but the OG!AU does have some variations to how the plot goes. You have Baby and Roman having Baby Jr before season one where Tabitha and Tern Haven are things that obviously never happened:

If Roman Knocked Baby Up Logan Bullying Baby Jr YoungBornBabyJr!AU With Roman Forcing Baby to Marry Him Roman Drunk and Loving If Roman Knocked Baby Up in Their 20s If Baby Jr was Little in The Pilot Logan’s Baby Jr Favoritism Where’s Your Daughter?

Then, you have Baby dying and Roman killing himself to leave Baby Jr an orphan: Come Time, Baby Jr Missing Mommy.

Or you have Baby AND Baby Jr dying to leave Roman killing himself after his last moments of suffering…which, I can't find, but do we really want to read that?

If you don't want to suffer, it can end simply as a nightmare Roman had in the night. Here's another Nightmare Blurb.

LOGANWINS!AU

Listen. I CANNOT be the only person who has consistently written for Logan. I CANNOT! But I do and Baby is unfortunately the victim of a joke turned into a horniness for an old, old man.

Logan doesn't actually have a fic establishing the Loganwins!AU. Everything that's longer than a blurb are moments that already take place after they've gotten together. Tern Haven does not take place here because it appears that this…intimate relationship takes place before season one. Roman doesn't get together with Tabitha in this AU because he's really fucked up about his soulmate having sex and marriage with his…Dad. His abusive Dad. Baby Jr does exist here! This started as a joke to get people grossed out over old man Logan cock, I played it so I was DISGUSTED to appease any requests that were sent in. I really was. I don't know what happened. But a lot of what is written expands past Logan x Reader and more about the AU itself, which happens with Kendallwins! and the OG!AU too.

FICS TO HELP: THE OFFICE CONFRONTATION Mondale The Second Baseball Sick Baby Jr Mom(my) Siblings and Baby Jr Buzz off! Sister Shiv Recital Alone Baby Jr How Does The Relationship Begin? How Does Logan Propose? Are Baby and Roman Still Close? Pregnancy Announcement in the AU They Bought a Cat Who's Baby Jr's Godfather? Panty Stealer Roman's Twitter Argument

You guys are lucky I can't find the smut fic I wrote. But it's here on this blog. Somewhere.

Nvm here it is my bad: Reflections.

AFFAIR!AU

There's the Loganwins!AU, then there's the Affair!AU, which was established pretty recently. It's where Baby begins an affair with Roman while she's married to Logan and Baby Jr ends up being Roman's daughter, not his little sister. As much as I have accepted my great enjoyment in indulging the Logan lovers, I do think this is Baby at her most Succession.

She gets the benefits of being Logan's wife and his favorite wife, a cute daughter, Roman at her heel, whining for her to really be with him but knowing he'll never leave her at her denial. She's horrible, a whore. A baddie winning.

FICS TO HELP: Baby Jr being Roman's Daughter Roman and Newborn Baby Jr Baby in the Affair!AU Roman revealing she's his to his siblings "Dada" A Slight Confrontation How does it start? In Dad's Bed

GROOMING SITUATION (OG!AU and KENDALLWINS!AU)

So, I explained most of it above, but these are the fics to help understand just how messed up DogandBone!Kendall is. He's a different man, guys.

(Also Stewy was there. Stewy was her friend. A flawed twenty-something year old who didn't care enough to separate himself from Kendall when noticing the red flags of him and Baby, but he denied, denied, denied. But he also gave Baby some sense of being…ya know, a kid…cause he saw her as a CHILD)

Tern Haven:

Tern Haven EXTENDED TERN HAVEN More of Tern Haven (…Yay…)

Ken's Groomer Era:

Sleepover Drugged Up Heart Does Baby go Clubbing With Kendall? The Birthday (Big One) Kendall being Confused That Baby's Not Jealous More of Ken being Confused That Baby's Not Jealous Sleepover 2 Kendall's Birthday Gifts....

The Aftermath:

Smacktalking During Too Much Birthday Bad Bit

There's more, of course. There's always more.

KENDALLWINS!AU

After Tern Haven, Kendall has Baby. He's won Baby. He gets more addicted to drugs while making her dependent on them. He turns her into nothing - and just for him. He's scary and paranoid when it comes to Roman. A variation of the AU would be the Babydies!AU, where she accidently overdoses after he leaves her alone. It's a lot. This is not a fun AU, guys. But I like to write it!

FICS TO HELP:

Housewife Thing Waystar Press Conference Accusing Baby Jr of Not Being His Roman Trying to Get Baby Back From Kendall A Slight, Brotherly Confrontation Daily Does of Horror (Heroin) Mention of Heroin Handsy Baby and Kendall and Pills Panty Stealer Brother Roman's Dick Pics Saying Roman's Name Flower Delivery

THE OD FICS:

No Time Needled Memories

NOW....

SHIV'S AU

Shiv's AU isn't even a win!AU, technically. We haven't really dabbled in the idea of her winning. Just more of her yearning, but all in all, this woman wants Baby soooo badly. Too sad she has the guilt of being a woman. And her father. And Tom. And the denial hot on her skin.

Calling Shiv Shiv

TOM'S AU

Apparently the man can get obsessed and they haven't even kissed in his AU, yet. Fitting considering the shit he pulls with Greg. It's Baby at her most guilty due to her friendship with Shiv.

KARL'S AU

No.

STEWY'S AU

I give crumbs and only crumbs. But we're getting something started with Wedding Bells (Part One)!

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.

I hope this helps! xoxo

[oneatlatime]

The Earth King

As always, commentary off.

No. Sokka. No. Stop. This is your stupidest idea yet. I want to LEAVE Ba Sing Se.

Sokka. Listen to your sister. And your other sister.

Toph embodying my will manifested on screen.

What makes you think the Earth King is going to listen to four teens and their fluffy dog? When I put it that way, this is Scooby Doo. Scooby Doo plus Momo. Does that make Momo Scrappy Doo?

We're going back to Ba Sing Se. Great. Yay. I'm so excited.

It is rapidly becoming apparent that Sokka has lost his mind.

Surface to air rocks is funny. I'll give it to them, that's good.

This fight scene music is fantastic.

Aang took a level in badass at some point without my noticing.

I know these hats are inspired by real historical hats, and so I really shouldn't make fun, but these look like the lovechild of a toilet brush and a feather duster.

This fight is majority Toph and Katara. RIP the egos of these several hundred Earth Kingdom soldiers.

Please ensure your fluffy little butt is securely stored in the overhead bins before takeoff.

There's no way these guys are still alive. This is what was done to Jet, doubled. They dead.

The girl who doesn't even want to be here is doing all the work. Typical.

My congratulations to Toph, Katara, and Aang for demolishing an army without breaking a sweat. If only season 1 Katara could see you guys now.

I said in my previous write up that Zuko doing something good always comes back to bite him. I didn't mean it this literally. Did he have to take the jug out with him, or was that for the drama?

Good job guys!

Soka steals my job and points out the fulfillment of the Beat Up Sokka quota.

His earthiness has an interesting set of priorities.

So... is this episode just going to be talking?

He brainwashed your friend? Did you miss that he killed him too?

I said in my last write up that Long Feng was Avatar's first competent villain, but the tone he takes with the Earth King is so unsubtle that I'm thinking of rescinding that claim. Unless the King is so dumb that subtlety isn't required?

Toothprints. Sokka the idea guy coming in clutch. Too bad his brain wasn't engaged at the start of the episode.

Appa is a herbivore. Confirmed. Although he should have fangs for aesthetic reasons. Fanged Appa would be metal.

This king is a confusing mixture of endearing and infuriating.

No mere fever will prevent me from doing mundane actions in the most dramatic way possible!

Way back in the 90s there was a print ad for Chevy trucks that I remember seeing in magazines. It had a shirtless guy in jeans sitting on the bed of his truck in a field, pouring a bucket of water over himself. It was kind of at sunset and had a very late summer vibe. I had completely forgotten about it until I saw Zuko's bucket shenanigans in this scene, at which point I was abruptly -ABRUPTLY- reminded of how much time little me spent staring at that ad.

OH MY GOD. The King doesn't know about trains!!! BLASPHEMY.

Huh. So the King isn't stupid, he's just horrifically naive.

Positive attitude Sokka is kind of frightening. I do not like.

If I told this King that I had a bunch of puppies in my windowless van, he would totally fall for it. So much about the Earth Kingdom suddenly makes sense.

That one guard is having a doozy of a day.

Did the King just show a smidge of self-awareness? Wasn't expecting that.

Who is this? I have no idea who this is. I didn't realise how integral the scar was to the character's design. Give it back.

Yikes. A bunch of shmymbolism. I suck epically at decoding shmymbolism unless it's really spoon fed to me, so I'm not even going to try to understand this dream beyond 'poor guy has a really bad fever.'

Has anyone seen the Spencer Tracy movie Father of the Bride? There's a bit where he has a dream that the floor on the way to the altar does pretty much exactly this. Hungry floors must be a common dream experience.

Pretty.

If the King is really this completely ignorant of the war, who's been directing the army?

It's pretty neat that Sokka is the spokesperson of Team Avatar, and that no one disputes that.

Aang says "there's a comet coming this summer," but I heard "comic" and I know they made tie in comics for the show, so I was like "ooh a crossover episode!"

"You're already vulnerable. The Fire Nation won't stop until the Southern Water Tribe falls. You can either sit back and wait for that to happen, or take the offensive, and give yourself a fighting chance." -Sokka's dad speaking to the men of the Southern Water Tribe, while his son listens perhaps a bit too closely.

If the King really was completely in the dark about the war, how does he even know who the General is? Did Long Feng have the power to keep the General from mentioning the war?

"Your majesty I'm General How, head of the Council of Five." "What's that?" "It's in charge of your army." "Right. And what's the army up to these days?" ... " ...I planted a lovely tomato garden this year."

I love that earthbenders don't wear shoes, and that it's culturally normal. Makes an intriguing visual contrast to their fancy duds.

I have GOT to know what Mushi the teamaker's secret file says.

Toph can't read guys.

Sokka, Katara, I get it. You miss home too. But how would anyone at all from your tribe know to send a message for you to Ba Sing Se? Last time you all touched base, you were headed to the Northern Water Tribe. And those guys sent you off to Omashu, not Ba Sing Se.

Nitpick time! Katara starts reading the text of this letter out loud before she unrolls it.

Katara's voice acting while she's reading the letter is sweet. She's so excited.

Iroh. Priorities. Tea can wait.

"Huh? What's happening?" "You huffed a bit too much cave slime under Lake Laogai. Just ride it out."

This vase is lit like a main character.

"You're going through a metamorphosis my nephew." Iroh, he's a bit too old for that talk. Hang on I just realised that Zuko went through puberty on that ship. I bet that was rough.

I don't trust this. This news is all too good.

Aang referring to them all as "the family" hurts a little bit.

It is unbearably sweet to let Sokka go see their dad while Katara helps the Earth Kingdom plan, but Katara sucks at planning. Then again, the Earth Kingdom sucks in general, so maybe having a sucky planner will be a net improvement?

Either way it's good little sister content.

But there are six Kyoshi warriors. I counted in Appa's Lost Days.

Oh they didn't

Attack hug!

Airbender Zuko is a very effective jumpscare. Don't blame him for freaking out.

You know it's bad when finding the scar intact comes as a relief.

Nope. Don't trust it.

Fuck this guy.

Long Feng even eats rocks maliciously.

Fuck these guys.

Oh they did. Fuck these guys.

Final Thoughts

And just like that, it all went to shit. Or it will.

I was braced to be annoyed by how conveniently quickly the Earth King got with the program, but it actually fits well into the rest of the episode. Instead of a thing that goes improbably well, it's the one thing that goes right in episode filled with set up for everything falling apart. That bothers me less.

This episode was actually fun. At least until the end. It was mostly talking and Zuko on a bad trip. But it was win after win for everyone but my Ba Sing Se hating self, and it's always good to see your favourites having a good day. But! I have a glimmer of hope! So long as Sokka and Aang aren't completely written out until they return to Ba Sing Se, at some point I'll get some episodes outside of the city. And I have Appa back, so things aren't too bad in the grand scheme of things. I wonder that Appa wasn't upset at having all his people back for five minutes then having them split up again.

I do not like positive thinking Sokka, and I especially don't like that I have no idea where he came from. That point wasn't set up at all. I want my baby cynic back.

If letting Appa go was enough to trigger Zuko's morality crisis to the point of physical illness, why didn't letting Aang go in The Blue Spirit, or choosing to chase after Iroh rather than the Gaang in The Winter Solstice Part 1, cause a similar illness? What is different about this time?

Toph was once again the voice of reason in this episode, or rather my personal audience insert. Although it did surprise me how excited she was to see her mom. I thought that sending bounty hunters after their own daughter was kind of unforgivable, but either Toph doesn't know, or she's a more forgiving person than I am.

I realise now that this should have occurred to me when I watched Appa's Lost Days, but what idiot didn't take the Danger Ladies into custody when the Drill was stopped? btw I keep calling them the PowerPuff Girls in my head.

This episode was simultaneously a finale to a lot of threads and an introduction to a lot more. It was a chance to breathe between crossing the finish line of the 'find Appa' quest and starting the 'season finale' quest. It was also structured backwards. The big fight was like six minutes in. The 'what are we doing this episode?' was one of the last scenes. But it still works. I'll be interested to see what I think of this one when I rewatch it. It was such an info dump that I wonder if my opinion of it will be different once I watch it with all of the relevant facts known to me already. Either I'll appreciate the episode's other parts like the comedy, or I'll be bored. We'll see.

Two episodes left this season! I don't think I'll be getting to those before next year. See you all in 2024! (time needs to slow way down)

[ilovespec]

Shark Love ~

Yandere Fem ! Gang Leader × Civilian Fem! Reader . the last part.

WARNINGS!!!: a little whining by the author, barely noticeable (if you squint) jokes by the author about cannibalism , a small description of death , mention of murders , mention of blood and organs , YANDERE is A FUCKING GANG LEADER!!! the difference in size, the difference in height, the difference in age, yandere has teeth like a shark. THE AUTHOR JUST WANTS A HUG

the text written in green is the text from the author.

7246 words (approximately)

It's about now... 7 o'clock in the morning.. Squalo...Miki...Martina and a couple of her "guard dogs" exterminated the ENTIRE "wild woods gang"... Absolutely everyone. Regardless of their gender. Or age. And their status... Everyone is killed... haha! And you might really think that this is only because "these are two competing giant gangs, you need more territory, money and DADAZVDAZVDAZVYDADKZ" yes. But not only because of this. And also because their leader is a bastard... AND HE TRIED TO FUCKING STEAL Y/N FROM SQUALO, HOW CAN THAT BE ??!??!! THIS MORON DOES NOT UNDERSTAND HOW THE ROAD SQUALO HER ANGEL ???!!!??! APPARENTLY NOT !!!

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

And so, as I said, it's 7 a.m. now... And Squalo went into her apartment. Surely she can't go to her beloved covered in someone else's blood and organ remains ? Yes. She helped Miki, in the "fun" over this moron-the leader of that gang, and his closest subordinates... And she's not sorry. She'll kill anyone who even thinks the wrong way about her angel. She went into the shower, and somehow washed off this "blood-organ" mixture... And just in case, she washed her head and her whole body. Her angel won't like it if she stinks of blood, sweat, and just dismemberment... And after washing up, she put on clean clothes and went to her babygirl's house..

(Time skip)

After 40 minutes, she finally arrived at her angel's house. This whole group of her people was standing at her house, door and just in ambush. Waiting for someone or something to try to harm their boss's "beloved." Squalo dispersed them to their homes, and she climbed into the open window... Oh, it made her task so much easier...! Finally, once in her room, she looked at her sleeping beauty.. Ah~ How Squalo wanted to protect her from everything ... Although.. Why not...? :)

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

That morning, a few hours later, Y/N quietly woke up in her apartment, in the arms of Squalo..She smiles softly, reaches out and kisses her gently on the forehead... Although she is the leader of the gang, but in a dream she is just a charmer! Her white and yellow short hair , usually combed back slightly they were disheveled , which allowed the short bangs to fall on her face... Because of her "night" outfit, almost all of her scars were visible.. And the breathing is so even.... But what Y/N didn't notice is that Squalo is watching her with emotion, with her eyelids almost closed. And somehow she refrains from covering her charming face with kisses here and now... But what made her open her eyes abruptly and sigh in shock was that Y/N hugged her to her chest (I WANT IT THAT WAY TOO!!! 😭😭) . Squalo chuckled softly, pinning her to the bed and hovering over her..

-Squalo: haha!~ that you already want to have fun , so early...

with these words, pressing her mouth to your neck... Apparently, breakfast can wait....

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

Ohh... Finally, her work was completed..she was trying to somehow distract herself from a violent quarrel with her colleague that happened yesterday .. He even hit her! She decided not to tell Squalo about it... Otherwise she'll set Miki on him..otherwise, even his own mother won't recognize him later...and strangely, he didn't come to work today.... Maybe he got sick...? Who knows. She calmly went home and corresponded on the phone with Squalo, huh~ Y/N everything is unclear.. The name Squalo literally translates as shark... She looks like a shark herself... And at the same time, she has an amazing number of photos with cute cats!!! Y/N chuckled softly from this , and finally reaching the house, she went up to her floor. She opened the apartment and as soon as she entered and closed the door , Squalo immediately rushed at her with an embrace , knocking her down with her massive , muscular and scarred body ..

-Squalo: MY ANNGEEEEEL !!!! Hello, my dear!!! ~

Sitting on top of Y/N, she began showering her face and generally the entire exposed skin with kisses, which made Y/N giggle softly and squirm

-Y/N: Squalo...Haha~ get off me please...You're 6'5 feet tall.. You are a head taller than me .....

Squalo obediently gets off Y/N, and picking her up in her arms like a child carries her to the kitchen, and sits her on a chair in front of a plate of food.. And she ruffles her hair with a grin. This food was meat! Y/N happily started eating it , and that was a little weird!! this meat was slightly strange .. And with a little blood...?

-Y/N: Wow! Squalo..What kind of meat is this? It's so delicious...

Squalo smiles toothily, and winks at her

-Squalo: the secret of the cook! And so, this is Rare roast pork. Don't worry, I won't feed you human flesh, haha~!

Squalo laughs loudly, and Y/N chuckles softly in response. She doesn't even know that her missing bastard is a colleague... In fact, he lies dead, buried deep in the forest. Squalo wouldn't feed her angel his meat , what are you doing 🤨...

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

The very next day, an active search was conducted for this colleague.. He's missing!!!! Y/N was hanging flyers, and now she was carrying a FUCKING GUN in her pocket !!! which Martina kindly taught her to use, and Squalo gave her the gun herself...because she was worried about Y/N, because suddenly there was another killer in their town...? Except for gangsters and bandits of course.. Although Y/N does not know this, but you already understand and know. They won't find this guy.. And the "killer" too... Haha! Miki is being secretive, lol.

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

It was already late in the evening... Y/N has already put up all the flyers and headed to the store... And then home.. After she bought at the store, she began to go home, and already corresponded with Squalo as usual~

-(Message from Squalo): "honey, I have a surprise for you (◠‿◠)"

-(message from Y/N): "hmm? What a surprise ??"

-(message from Squalo): "when you come home, you'll see (つ^ ^)つ"

Y/N giggles, thinking what a surprise Squalo has in store... and it's not for nothing that Y/N bought her cookies in the form of sharks! She will have something to give in exchange ... She chuckles softly before squeaking softly in surprise... THEY DRAGGED HER INTO AN ALLEY , AND PUT A RAG SOAKED IN SOME KIND OF CRAP TO HER MOUTH , BECAUSE OF WHICH SHE FAINTED !!!

｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

When she woke up she found that.... Tied to the bed .. Silk. Very delicate silk.... And when I I say gentle... I MEAN, I'M FUCKING GENTLE AS A CLOUD!!! her legs... They are also shackled by him.. But her arms are tied to the bed so tightly, and her legs are tied so tightly that she can't even move... And yes. A few of the most important things... Firstly.. THE WHOLE FUCKING ROOM IS COVERED WITH HER PHOTOS!! Secondly... Someone big hugs her from behind... She looked down and saw familiar hands covered with scars.. It was Squalo....Fuck. SQUALO OR HER SUBORDINATES KIDNAPPED HER!!! And even worse, her mouth was gagged... Fuck. With a gag. Shamefully.. Y/N started squirming and trying to scream, but she only woke up Squalo, who giggled with joyful obsession.. Like some kind of obsessive maniac, over Y/N's attempts to free herself... And finally, when Y/N somehow shifted her gag, she spoke..

-Y/N: Please... Squalo..darling... What did I do to you....?

Tears started rolling down Y/N's cheeks and Squalo..She began to kiss the places where there were tears and lick them off..

-Squalo: Oh... My dear... My naive sweet rabbit.. Little angel... The world is so dangerous~ it's better if you're always with me... Why do you need to work? Should I overexert myself or quarrel with these "shitty clients and colleagues" of yours...? You'd rather be with me.. Safe... I'm much better than all of them..

THE END!!!!!

I hope you enjoyed This part <3 (it seems to be my biggest part so far, lol) and don't pay attention to my TOO frequent remarks during almost the entire part. I'm in a good mood today >3<

[marivoid]

Entry 27

Day 204

Guess who was heading NORTH instead of SOUTH. How could one mess up this bad? Well, apparently the sun's direction has flipped! It rises in the west, and sets in the east! The earth has done a full turnaround on how it works! That asteroid really screwed us over.

Although I only learned that fact with the help of a man named Keralis. I just happened to see the smoke billowing out through a forest of Evergreens (Still shocked that those trees are even alive) and followed it to a rather lovely wooden cabin.

I would love to say I turned tail right there and left while I still could! (-Random buildings with smoke means people and I would rather not want to find out if they are deadly-) But my plans were foiled when my foot got caught in a snare trap and left me dangling like a pinta!

And just to make matters worse, guess who happened to walk out at that time!

(Spoilers, the owner of the cabin!)

"Are you alright? No broken bones?"

"A slight head rush! But nothing too awful!"

Now, one may think the most sensible way to untie somebody hanging upside down is to undo the rope around their ankle and lower them down. That would be a perfectly sane, reasonable option.

Not taking an axe and slashing just a few centimeters above your foot and sending you falling head first into the ground.

(My neck still hurts as of writing this.)

"You really need to watch out for those traps! Scavengers and bandits love to use those sorts of things to rob people blind!" The best way to describe his voice was Swedish. (I think. I've only ever heard Swedish accents in old TV shows in the G.U.I.D.Es)

"I'll definitely try harder in the future?"

After I had managed to collect myself from that little mishap, the man explained to me what he was doing out there. Apparently Keralis had been living in the woods for a few years now and had rigged it full of traps in case any wanderers (like me) or Stranglers got a bit too close to home.

He seems like a nice enough man. Brought me inside, got me a couple glasses of water and was overall very hospitable. Asked a few questions about where I was going and... Well.

"I'm trying to find the Demon and Heavy-Body Builder. I should get there tomorrow but I haven't really seen... Anything, really."

Keralis had fallen silent at the mention of the names. However... Back then he just sounded like he was holding in his laughter the more I think about it. "And are you sure you're going the right way?"

"Yes? The sun rises in the east, sets in the west. Work off of that and you're fine."

"Switch those two around."

"... What do you mean, switch those two around?"

And thus began a minute of the loudest, heartiest belly laughter I've ever heard. This poor man may have died from his laughter if he had not collected himself!

"I'm sorry- I'm sorry! But goodness-" A wheeze and another laugh. "-I haven't met anyone who didn't know that! Of course you haven't found them, you're going the wrong way! Come, come, I'll show you something that should help!"

Keralis showed me a room that would have been any mapmaker's dream come true. There were so many maps pinned up on the walls, feather quills laying about on a cluttered desk, and a huge window that just made the room feel SAFE.

I hadn't realized I had been staring at everything for so long when he set a compass in my hand. "This, my dear friend, will get you where you need to go." He had said with a twinkle in his eyes. (His HUGE eyes, mind you.)

"I... Are you sure? These things seem hard to find."

"Oh nonsense! Nonsense! I can make another one if I really need it. But you, mister, are running around like a dog trying to catch its own tail! In circles!" His hand had fallen on my shoulder at that point and something about it... Just seemed off. His hand was unnaturally firm and felt colder than a normal hand? "Where you need to go is Comparator City! I have a map just for it as well- I know a few people there myself!"

The man kept rambling about something (I can't tell you what) because I had seen something off with his neck. Why was it darker on one side than the other? And what was up with those lines? They looked so much like...

"Sweet face? You are staring!"

"I-I'm sorry, who?" That shocked the ever loving stars out of me. Even now, I have never met anyone who calls a stranger 'Sweet Face.'

"You silly! Sweet Face! Since I still don't know your name after all!" He dropped a rather heavy roll into my arms while I was still in my state of shock. "Those are for you! One map straight to Comparator City, and a few slips of blank paper to make your own maps." Before I could even thank him for his kindness, Keralis was pushing me out of the room. "I have a spare room you can stay in for the night. It's the least I can do for you getting strung up like that! There is also a river nearby, if you need to take a plunge. I've already tested, no flesh eating bacteria in it! Just... Don't drink the water. To be safe."

And... That leads us to now. Me writing in this journal after being able to actually soak in water for once (No more ten minute rushes) and a soft bed for the night. It's really nice here. But unfortunately I can't stay. I need to find The Doctor. And now...

Now I'm just one step closer to finding him.

-MLW

-G.U.I.D.E 67

[regular-lord-reckoner]

hello.

just wanted to pop in for a minute because i said i would and then i didn't, so...here i am finally.

not much is really new, i guess, nothing all that good anyway.

i guess the one bit of good news is our "neighbors" R and C finally moved their camper back to where it was before this arrangement which is still in the same city just on an actual campground. That was at the beginning of this month so that's been nice.

again, nothing against them personally really, it's just...they were always right there, y'know?

especially it seemed every time i'd be at my wit's end for one reason or another and all i'm trying to do is get a package off the porch or let the dog out and then here's one of them just pulling up or C especially would get home from work and just...be in the yard until the sun went down.

and i'd have to just force a smile and act like i'm not completely losing my shit when all i wanted was just to go back inside so that was kinda rough, but it's over now so yay.

i won't complain too much because i know i did a lot of that before and i really don't mean to be so hard on them or on anyone, but it did feel at times like things just sort of crossed the line at least in my mind, but I feel like I can get over it easier now that they're not right there.

although I'm not as sure about R. I don't really know fully what's going on with her, but she's really made herself unpopular at work by the sounds of it and from what i gather it's because she's being rude to the patients and her coworkers.

like, i've heard several times now where something happened that's actually something she did wrong, but rather than just own the mistake and try to fix it she just...argues with whoever pointed it out to her until she gets all upset and goes crying into one of the managers offices and i dunno if it's because she's still trying to get them to just fire her or what, but like....they're not gonna, they don't want to pay her unemployment.

and i still stand by, hey, if that's the route you want to go about this, at least do it in a way that doesn't take out your shit on other people, especially ones who don't deserve it.

and what's really pissed me off is she actually checked in another family friend of ours who really wasn't feeling well (and even had to tell R that to try to get her to back off), but i guess she didn't recognize her even though they've met and for whatever reason she gave this friend that hardest fucking time for no goddamn reason.

like gaslighting her about what time she actually got there for her appointment and was telling her she wouldn't be seen even though she really wasn't even that late and then she even started being rude to one of the other patients standing there waiting and that friend had to come to their defense and it just makes me wonder like...how many other patients is this happening with?

again, just...hate it that you're unhappy here, genuinely sorry this job is giving you such a tough time, but i'm really just at a loss here because i've offered to help train her further, i've given her the names of people who could help further train her, i've given her some pointers and tips and i've also emphasized just how important it is for that job to be done correctly (especially as it affects my mom's schedule) and yet she still just shows up every day, half-asses it without accepting any help from anyone even when they offer, gets pissed off at everyone including the patients and then dips early to leave the other front desk person to be the last one out every day.

okay!!! i guess!!!

and it's also made me mad because she has talked some to that other front desk lady who's of course relayed this to my mom, but like...apparently R's version of events is that she's just go unhappy living down here and was happier where they were before and it's so sad because they did us this huge favor by coming down here to help take care of my dad and she just doesn't know what's happened now and blah blah blah, but by the sounds of it i guess this situation was really helpful to them financially which is great, but like............that was never the deal!!!

it also just kills me like, wait a minute......you guys VOLUNTEERED to help with my dad. we did not ask you. in fact, he wasn't really the biggest fan of the idea, nor was i. my mom wanted the help, though, so she agreed, but even she made it clear that they didn't have to do that because even she was on the fence about doing something that big.

we also had to work it out with the county and everything and they had told us we could only do it for six months but it ended up being 10 and no one ever came out and said anything or told us to stop, but that alone right there was like....hey, we can't guarantee anything, they may come out here the day the six months is up and tell you guys to pack it up, we have no clue, but point is....this was never an indefinite arrangement.

we said we'd play it by ear and see how it goes and i guess my mom really want to give C plenty of time to do whatever projects he was going to do, but this was never, ever once mentioned about being a mutually beneficial thing of like, "hey, we give you some help with your situation and you help us with ours!!" they acted like this was purely out of the goodness of their hearts and all for our benefit and then it's like....you guys come out here and don't do the stuff we wanted, do a bunch of stuff we didn't actually want and then R goes to work and actively fucks up my mom's day so bad almost every goddamn day that she doesn't get lunch (and i've told her that's what happens so she can't pretend like she has no clue!!!) and yet somehow......you guys were doing us a favor????

you didn't get out here until like....what, a few days before he died and helped me all of one day with him??

also, not for nothing but like...of this ten months my mom never charged them any rent and only after six months did she ask for some utilities and even then she would low ball it or not even ask for it if C had done a lot of stuff around the place for us and i even let R use my car for a while even though there were two perfectly good other vehicles sitting there that nobody was using she could have used instead but for some reason it just had to be my car.

she even bragged to that same front desk lady before that they were getting caught up on all their bills and saving up all this money and everything so like....by no means is them moving out us like...tossing them out with nothing and yet by the way R's making it out to sound we (or i guess more specifically my mom) are doing them an unkindness somehow and i just can't wrap my head around that.

even when we had the discussion about them moving, it was actually C who brought it up to my mom, so we didn't even come down on them like, "get the fuck out of here already!!!" and even when they discussed it she didn't bring up any of the negative shit, she just put it like y'know, it's been about a year and we think we're ready to try this on our own for now but even in saying that she let them know they had plenty of time to figure out what they were going to do and it ended up taking a month longer than what they told us initially, but we were totally cool about it, didn't even ask, "hey, what's the hold up?" or anything, just rolled with the flow and yet i guess no matter what you do for some people it'll just never be enough.

and again, clearly if she's going through something i hate that for her, but like...don't take that out on us. or anyone for that matter. i know she had a little health concern there for a minute, but everything's good now so i hope maybe that'll bring her some peace and hopefully she can either find a new job that makes her happier or maybe they'll end up moving back to where she was happier or just...something.

i really didn't want things to be ugly like this and i'm sure there's probably something more we could have done on our part, but at the same time it's also kinda like....y'know, we really needed that time, especially right after my dad died, to just be able to breathe and focus on our own healing and it really ended up being more about helping them and doing stuff for them and around them than anything so that....kinda sucks!!!

oh, and one last thing before i ramble on some more and then disappear like homer back into the bushes, but as they were leaving C told me at some point he'd come back and that i ought to get out my dad's gun so he could teach me how to shoot it now that they'll be leaving and, i dunno, maybe i'm wrong for feeling this way because i'm sure his heart was in the right place but like.......bud, i don't do guns. i think we all know this about me at this point. for good reason.

secondly, uh......just because there's not gonna be a man around here anymore doesn't mean we're helpless sitting ducks. i'm not saying i would definitely win in some kind of altercation should someone try to attack me at home or whatever, but i dunno, man.

my thing of it is, if someone is going to get me it's probably going to be in a scenario where i'm not even close to the gun anyway, y'know? that fucker's staying inside and locked up, if i'm under attack i'm either using whatever i have around me as a weapon and/or i'm unleashing all the rage i have bottled up inside of me and hoping for the best.

literally the other day i thought, "hmm, what if someone came at me while i was in the pool, what would i do?" and i'd probably try to get on the deck, grab one of the chairs on there and use it as sort of a shield/battering ram and even if the person takes it from me that'll at least give me a few seconds to run or do something else.

i've also got pool chemicals down there so like...how's some pool shock in your eyes for ya? how about some algaecide! you want some chloride tablet dust hands all over your face? you got it!! how about i whack you real good with this skimmer pole? and if possible....push the attacker in the pool and make a run for it!! there's so many options and i have too much time to think about stuff like that, so like...i'll either be fine or it's my time then it's my time, either way uh....i think i'm good, thanks.

i dunno, that kinda irked me, but whatever. it's over and that's the important part. i hope maybe we can all still be friends but i guess we'll see how things go as time goes on. i'm kind of at a point now where i sort of just expect relationships to fall apart and i just don't really give a damn anymore.

in other news, i fucked up !!!

so, i've been doing this thing for a while now with my work from home stuff where like...i'm not always necessarily working for all the time i'm actually clocked in because i end up doing other stuff around the house or sometimes a break just gets away from me or i'll even go to appointments and stuff, but!!!!

one of my managers had told me that was okay because i always got my work done and for the most part i did!!

i frequently would stay up until midnight and work on the weekends off the clock to make up for the time and thought it was all evening out and it was all good, but apparently!!!!! it was not!!!!!!

and so one day i just kinda get slammed with this information and then had to have a phone call with the manager that makes me cry about this because it's apparently a big no-no to do things that way for one thing but for another i guess here lately i haven't been making up the time like i thought, especially with me working 50 hours a week, so!!!

fortunately i didn't get fired, some fucking how.

she said if someone else besides her had caught it i would have been immediately terminated (so hey, R, i guess i found a way to get instantly fired after all, lol, just do that!!) but instead i'm just no longer allowed to get any overtime, i can't work off the clock anymore and i'm definitely being monitored so i have to be really careful now whenever i get up to use the bathroom or take the dog out or wash some dishes or whatever that i'm not away from my computer for too long so now instead of getting distracted by chores for however long that takes i do one thing, run to my computer and do some work and then do another little thing and then back to my computer, etc.

but, hey, i'll take it since they're letting me stay which i really appreciate. i really honest to god thought i was making up for the time and didn't think it was a problem, but i guess the manager that told me it was okay didn't realize, i guess and on my end i just got sloppy with it so i apologized profusely and now i'm just dealing with the consequences.

i did manage to not cry, though. the only time i got a little choked up was when the manager i was speaking with was even at one point like, "honey, i'm surprised you're not burnt out..." because she said she could see where i was up until midnight or even later just working and the fact that she could tell i was but no one else really has was just kinda like, ha, wow.

but yeah. i'm also not sure now if i'll even get a raise this year, which it's usually only a few cents anyway so it's not like, "no, my big raise!!" but still. that few cents helps and especially now that i'm not getting that good overtime money i am....feeling it, mr krabs.

i was finally getting to a point after being set back a few thousand dollars on top of still being in my own debt where i felt like i could finally start to breathe again and was even putting some in savings but that's all gone out the window now and i'm having to be even more careful than i already was with my spending, but this one's my own damn fault so i can't really be too upset about it.

i've instead just hopped back on the job search train to hopefully see about getting a second job that i can work around this first one. if i find something that could replace this one then even better probably but i'll just have to see, it's been a slow process so far because i am indeed quite burnt out, but we're trying. i'm even willing to do something that'll have me in person somewhere since i've got a flo mask now and can breathe a little easier while still staying safe in public settings so i could probably handle something like that with better peace of mind now.

hopefully i find something soon, but if not i'll figure it out.

sucks, though too because i started something with my gyn back when i was making that better money that i'm now getting bills for and we're still not done so...yippee (i think i can set up a payment plan, though and even if it takes me years i'll pay it all off).

basically when i finally had that goddamn appointment i was losing my mind over i had my checkup and everything went good there, but i also brought up the fact that i.want.an.ablation.

and i thought my np was going to be receptive to it, but when i actually got there i kind of felt like i strated getting the run around a little.

the first thing she said to me was, "well, with your weight..." and i pretty much mentally blacked out after that because a million thoughts (many of them from my disordered eating past) started swirling and all i could think about was "lose the weight, lose the weight now, oh my god, you've fucked this up for yourself, you fucking idiot" so i didn't really get the whole gist of what she was saying about that, but i did also think it was kind of weird because my mom was bigger than i am when she had hers done and it wasn't an issue so like ???

she also mentioned something about potential bleeding or whatever, but again i could barely focus at that point and whatever she was saying, it wasn't a complete no either so we went ahead with the exam and made a plan (she also asked me about my dad at one point, like "how's your dad doing?" and i had to break the news to her while i was sitting there like...basically naked and about to get my pap smeared. so that was neat. she was nice about it though and i do like this np because she at least went to get a mask when she saw mine so i'll give her that).

when she was doing my exam she said my uterus seemed like it was sitting a little low which could indicate it might be heavy for some reason and i know this is terrible but i was praying to every force in the universe that that bitch was full of fibroids like my mom's or just...something that would render me getting this procedure done or having the whole thing taken out, something.

she wanted me to have another period and then come in for a transvaginal ultrasound so we could see what that was about and granted she did give me some medicine to take that would help make my periods less intense (because that's the other reason i want this, i do not want to have any more fucking periods, especially with how heavy mine are!!!!) but it's these two big honking ass pills i gotta take three times a day while i'm on my period but it's only for five days and mine area usually seven (plus it's like $50 and part of the idea is also like....i'm tired of spending money on period products, why the fuck would i want to spend $50 a month on this medicine AND still have to buy period products??) and yeah, they seem to help some without counteracting the medicine i need to actually be able to walk and all that shit (although the jury's still undecided about that one because it's hard to tell if i'm just regular old exhausted or if it's those pills but i did seem to have a harder time getting around and was overall a lot weaker on them so...who knows) but i just don't know if it's a long-term solution for me.

in any case, i did a round of that and had my ultrasound and the only thing it showed was a spot that could potentially be a polyp but it could also be blood or something else, so she wanted me to have another period on those pills (which i have now) and i go in next week for another ultrasound to see if it's cleared up or still there and if we can see it any clearer if it is.

and if it is still there they may go in and go in to clear it out and that might give me some period relief as well or i dunno, whatever the case calls for i guess, but apparently as soon as i have that ultrasound done i finally get to meet with one of the doctors that does the surgery to plead my case, i guess, so fingers fucking crossed.

i've prepared myself to hear bad news, so i guess at this point if i don't get it i'll at least be saving some money, so i'll look at this that way and i guess if i just tough it out for a while longer i'lll probably be in menopause before i know it so i'll just suck it up if that's what it comes down to, but i'm open to trying some other options first, i just know a lot of traditional birth control fucks with my medication and i just....can't do that but that'll be for me to sort out and i will, whatever the answer ends up being.

oh, and i did try to clarify with her what the cautions were again at that second appointment when i had a clearer head and she didn't mention my weight again, but did say something about the bleeding and i guess it's something about how especially in younger patients they're starting to see internal bleeding around menopause or something and it's hard to tell if it's from the ablation or something else or what, but again i even ran that by mom who's a nurse and she was like, "mmmm, okay" so it really feels like they're just gonna hit me with every excuse they can think of to deter me, but i expected that so i'm not really shocked, just kind of annoyed.

it really does just piss me off to no end that like...i, someone who's almost 34 goddamn years old, can't just be like, "hey, hate this shit and i want it to stop, plus getting pregnant is not something i have any interest in doing whatsoever and i'm pretty sure i physically couldn't do it anyway, please let me make this perfectly rational decision for my body that would help with both of these things without running the risk of making my disability harder to deal with or drastically fucking up my hormones, please," and it be like, "okay, sure thing," and we just do the damn procedure.

but hey, at this point, if by some miracle i'm able to get one i'll shut the fuck up because i realize at this point even being able to still have access to any kind of birth control (whether it would work for me or not) is a blessing so i'll just take whatever answer i get and try to make the best of it.

so that's that saga for now, i'll keep you posted, i guess. and speaking of appointments and health stuff....now on to my therapy. yay.

i decided i wanted to cancel my appointment that was supposed to be this most recent thursday because for one thing i didn't really feel up to it and for another i was tighter on money this week so rather than owe her more than what i already do (which i'm paying her back, too, just like with everything else it's slow going) but anyway, i emailed her on monday and didn't hear anything back.

i know i've mentioned to her several times that i don't have good cell service at my house and she knows i work from home and never go anywhere except the grocery store, plus i know she's said that she responds to texts faster, but like...by no means had she ever said she doesn't respond to emails at all and i know we've emailed in the past so like...okay.

it gets to be wednesday in the afternoon past lunch time and still no response so i just say fuck it and clock out from work, get in my car and drive out to where there's cell service and sent her a text letting her know i needed to cancel my appointment and maybe this is my fuck up, but i did also mention that i had sent an email and i was having to clock out and drive out just to send a text and i wasn't really sure how to reschedule since this seemed like the only means of communication now.

i waited a few minutes but didn't think she'd get back to me right away anyway, plus i needed to get back to work so i went ahead and drove home, but she never did email me back and instead a few days later (because of the bad cell service i keep mentioning) i finally got her response through text and it just said "gotcha" and another that said "you can leave a voicemail at this number" and i dunno, i'm probably overreacting but that just felt...kinda shitty to me??

you're a therapist who primarily deals with neurodivergent clients, you know your patients hate talking on the phone. and again, i've told her over and over and over again the thing about the cell service and i guess it was never said explicitly like, "hey, please let me communicate through email with you about appointments and stuff" but it was also never said officially, "hey, i refuse to check my email or respond to any of them even when i know they're there and even though i'm supposed to be a professional" so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

and i dunno, i guess i'm just extra pissy, too because i've been sort of thinking for a minute now anyway that i might need to find a new therapist.

don't get me wrong, she has helped me quite a bit in this past year and i don't know what i would have done if there wasn't someone i could talk to about all this shit, but that was part of the problem is that even though i've been going for over a year now it still feels like sometimes i have to explain things i've explained a thousand times before all over again (like in particular anything about grief she always treats me like i'm a novice at this and i always have to be like, "yeah, well like with my sister...." to remind her) and it's just kind of frustrating because i only get an hour and i'm paying all this money and it's like...are you even really listening to me? do you actually care?

i know she has a lot of clients and i know it has to be a lot to keep up with but i dunno. i especially felt like at our last session before this interaction even happened that she was a little short with me?

i chalked it up to her just having a bad day because she did mention some insurance shit (and of course mine always gives her trouble and i always hear about it first thing and i'm just like....yeah, i don't really know what to do about that, you keep saying your lady who does your financial shit is going to reach out to me to clear all this up but she never does and my insurance card says i can't contact them so i dunno what to really do other than just keep overpaying for my sessions until i'm caught up i guess, sorry) but maybe it's me. probably it's me. isn't it always?

she's also the type of therapist anyway that will admit to you that she likes to sort of work herself out of clients, i.e. help them enough to where they don't really need her and i guess in my case i probably haven't progressed all that much and certainly after a year if i'm still making appointments and am behind on my payments i guess i'm just taking up space so maybe she's fed up with me, but i wish she'd just say that so i could just work on finishing up what i owe her and move on to someone else, y'know?

also, not for nothing but like...i feel like sometimes in our sessions we talk more about her and she monopolizes the conversation more than i ever really get to talk about shit and i don't really think our worldviews are as compatible as i thought they were so i've been a little bit on pins and needles anyway for a while, but was willing to still give it a chance because i know how i am and i wanted to really give this a shot, but it's just becoming less and less worth the hassle and is starting to create more stress for me than anything, so i've tentatively started to make a list of other therapists, but i'm willing to give this another chance or two before i make my decision.

really sucks, too because i've been trying really hard lately to get my mom into therapy and i didn't even want to tell her about any of this so as not to deter her from wanting to give it a shot, but i ended up telling her anyway today because i got upset about her drinking again and needed her to know i'm really struggling over here and don't even have any help at the moment and so it's just really tough for me when i can't even leave the house for a few hours without her getting blackout drunk.

it really got to me today because one of my aunts has come up from florida to see my grandma because we're getting to that point where uh...she might not be here soon so she really wanted to see her, well, that was all well and good except of course she flew in yesterday with all that shit going on so everything was delayed and we had to go to atlanta to pick her up and i don't think she was wearing a mask so already i'm just like....awesome.

y'know, i get it, i reached a point sometime last year where it was like, "okay, i'm in a position where whether i like it or not i'm going to be around people who aren't masking all the time and maaaaybe we have gotten to a point where it's cool as long as i'm still mostly isolating and staying up to date on my vaccines? so i took some more risks and boy did i pay for that!! i tend to forget i've got that weak immune system, babey, so i especially can't play those games, plus i really don't want to get anyone else sick so i've masked again and my mom still masks at work but i don't think she does it all the time so that's frustrating, but like...my aunt just traveled and was at the airport during a super busy time so it'll be a fucking miracle if nobody ends up getting sick.

i've harped on and on and on especially lately about how worried i am about covid and bird flu and how i'm especially vulnerable and i've tried to be really understanding and patient about it because i get how human beings work, i get how it fucks with people's heads to go out in public all the time and not see anyone but one or two people, if that, still masking, i get it's still "out of sight, out of mind" in a lot of ways, but just....fuck.

so, i'm stressed about that, but also i went to actually drop her off at my grandma's today (which i know it's like, "if you're worried about people getting sick should they still be visiting?" and i hate to say it, but they're both old enough and educated enough about this to know the risks and my grandmother wakes up every morning begging Jesus for death so i don't think she really cares, tbh) and i ended up taking a route that's over this windy ass mountain and of course it was pouring torrential rain as i'm doing it so i get through all of that and i get a little closer to home before i try to call my mom to see if she needs me to stop and get her anything on my way in, plus just let her know i got my aunt there safe and all that and she kept picking up the phone but just....not responding.

and i thought at first it was a technical issue on my end or sometimes our land line does weird shit like that, so i wasn't freaking out just yet although a part of me was like, "oh my god, she's on the floor injured and is trying to answer me but can't" but as i later came to find out she was just super duper drunk. i managed to even get her on the phone a few times but she kept hanging up on me she was so out of it.

and i dunno, i know this makes me a massive child, especially at my age, but it just kinda hit me like, "oh shit, i'm really alone in this bitch, huh?"

like...what if something had happened to me? or to my aunt? what if we'd gotten into a car crash driving through that rain? she wouldn't have been able to come to the ER, she would have needed to sleep it off.

and i mean, that's fine, i guess. i'm a big girl, i need to deal with shit on my own, it just sucks that she couldn't even wait until i got home to get that messed up. i wouldn't have been happy about it, but i probably wouldn't have said anything other than encourage her to go lie down when it was obvious she was getting too far gone, but since i wasn't there she passed that point and it's like...here i am, stressed out about a million different things, we just had my sister's death anniversary last weekend and we've got the double whammy next month of my dad's one year passing anniversary and then a week later his birthday, i just drove through hell and i'm calling you trying to do something nice for you and you're hanging up on me and don't give a fuck what happens to me because you just had to get shitfaced drunk in the middle of the day.

but i calmed down some and she sobered up some (not before drinking again later, but still) and i apologized and just kinda of let her know a little of what's been going on and why i'm so stressed.

i know it won't make a difference and i know she's probably never going to change and it's only going to get worse, but i just wanted her to know it wasn't coming from nowhere and it's just frustrating this keeps happening and only seems to get worse as time goes on.

sometimes i think it might finally be getting better or she might finally be willing to go to therapy, but then we have another day like this and it just kinda shatters that reality.

i really have tried to be patient and give her grace and just gently usher her off to bed while i take care of the dog and shut everything down and clean everything up and try to make things easy for her, but it's like i'm just doomed to sit here and watch everyone i love self-destruct in some way or another and there's not a goddamn thing i can do about it except every so often scream and cry about it, but that also doesn't really change shit so oh well.

she'll either get help or won't but my tears clearly mean dick to her or to this addiction and i'm too exhausted to keep pleading my case so in the mean time i've started making a list again of potential therapists for her so she can look them over and i'll help in any way i can to get her set up with all of that, but after that the ball is fully fucking in her court, i can't do it anymore

i've sort of been her stand in therapist this entire time which we both know isn't appropriate or fair to me but clearly nothing's quite as good as alcohol and if it's at this point where it's truly more important than me then so be it, i guess.

i still love her very much and she's kind of all i have left as far as people i'm close to so i don't want to lose her in any sense, but i'm also just sort of preparing myself for that just in case i need to leave here and focus just on myself or she kicks me out or just...something.

my dad had told me he was concerned about how things would go for us, especially with her drinking, but he did all he could do and i did all i could do and that's that, i guess.

it just really sucks that he's not here anymore for me to talk to about this. he understood. so did ashley. i would give any fucking thing on this earth to just be able to talk to either of them again. i've truly never felt more alone in my life than i have these past few months or years at this point, i don't even know, but i'm just kind of done with everyone and everything at the moment. i'm on autopilot.

i'm going to just try to find enjoyment wherever i can and hold on to that and just keep doing my best even if it's shitty and not good enough for anyone else and even if everything around me continues to fall apart and just get worse and worse as times goes on i'm going to just....keep going, i guess. until i can't anymore.

one thing, though that i've decided is that i refuse to be a nuisance to anyone else. i really don't want to be that person that takes my shit out on anyone else just because i'm a miserable bastard having a rough time of it with things, especially shit that's mine to sort out anyway.

i don't care where i end up or what happens to me, i would really rather beat the shit out of myself until i'm all bruises or give myself a concussion before i become so miserable i decide to take it out on someone else, in any way. even if someone's hurt me, i don't give a shit about getting even or getting revenge or any of that petty bullshit, i just want to be left the fuck alone and honestly the more i go on, the better that probably is.

i'm probably just not in a good head space right now and will change my mind later and who knows, may even try to make new connections later, but for the time being i just want to sleep for about a hundred years straight and then worry about being a person after that.

anyway, this is very long and quite a bummer so i apologize if you've read all this.

i kept waiting to make an update until i'd have something positive to end on at least or something promising to look forward to, but uh...nope. seems like shit just kinda gets a little worse every day and i know it's only a drop in the bucket compared to how life in general is right now for everyone so i'll wrap up this little whine fest, i just hate that i pretty much abandoned this space even though i like being on here (i also get a lot of naked bots following me when i don't post for a while so there's that, too).

anyway, hopefully the next time i pop in for an update i'll have better news or i might just stick my head in now and again more often, i keep saying that but then...yeah.

anyway, hope if you're reading this life's treating you well and if it's not i hope it will soon. i know shit's really rough right now so i hope you're finding joy whenever and wherever possible and holding on to it.

later days <3

[sonicasura]

Tales of Father Rung: Jak

The last example for the Father Rung saga and I saved the most traumatized character for last.

Let's face it, Daxter is the only one who stuck by Jak's side since the start. In Fallout Boy's terms 'The Last of the Real Ones'. Everyone else either abandons him at some point or sadly dies too soon. Daxter gets dragged along for the ride. *Man needs his pal since Naughty Dog wants Jak to suffer clearly.*

Let's get started.

Rung comes across an unconscious Demolition Duo one fateful night. Jak is the last to wake up as he sees Daxter talking to the 'giant robot'. Rung offers to accompany the young men since the mech been here much longer.

Jak is skeptical about the therapist at first. Throughout their travelling, Rung never asks the Eco Channeler for help. Both handle their own tasks instead of the young man shouldering it all. Jak's even more confused when Rung helps him instead. No strings attached either.

Meanwhile Rung is a mix of rage and sorrow upon hearing the duo's backstory. Angry at those who groomed a child into a "chosen savior" then toss him away as if he's a worthless tool or a monster. Saddened by the fact Jak is stuck with a Prime Complex.

Daxter being treated like a nuisance when he's the only one who saw how much pain his best friend is in. A voice with wonderful ideas drowned out cause people believe he is just a mindless animal. Rung gonna help these two if no one else can.

A notion challenged when Dark Jak manifests. Rung didn't run or treat this alternate form like a monstrous threat. An action that proves to the eco channeler as a whole about the mech truly caring about them. Daxter is glad he doesn't have to spill it out.

Even when Jak's dark form mutates into something more inhuman, Rung refuses to treat the young man any different. The mech does his best to heal the trauma engraved on both boys. Daxter's opinions and suggestions are heard than ignored. (What I mean by DJ getting worse. Face + body here.)

The ottsel gleefully indulging in being treated as a person. No belittling or push to the side. Even ottsels are people too. (Only ones who treat Daxter like a person can be counted on one hand. Plus he now got tons of pants.)

An incident creates a second chance to set things right. Jak and Daxter wake up back in their world(start of Jak 2) but as Cybertronians. (Jak being a Predacon type Triple Changer, Ramjak with Slam Dozer/Dragon Alt Modes. Daxter is a Minicon Beastformer, Citrus Bolt.(Orange Lightning would be a dead giveaway)). Rung is stuck inside the Eco Channeler's Spark Chamber as a phantom.

The three help past Jak and Daxter reunite the Kid with his actual father Damas. A better future is secured as the King of Spargus not only has his son back but continue to live alongside his two additions. It takes until the end of the journey for the two Cybertronians to reveal their true identity.

The young boys feel at ease afterwards. Jak and Daxter can now switch into their bot forms with some help from Rung. It takes awhile before they can do it by themselves. The Demolition Duo are able to wield Energon now(and so much more.)

Now let's move on to the TFverse.

Earthspark

The therapist's makeshift family lives in Witwicky not too far from the Malto's household. Hiding his ears, Jak works as a stocker at a grocery store near town. A store that becomes commonly visited by Alex.

The two form a friendship unaware of the secrets they are hiding. Jak didn't expect to learn that Cybertronians exist here nor the millennia long civil war ending some time ago. Much less this info being found in media like comic books and other merchandise. (He obviously tells Rung alongside Daxter later.)

GHOST's Decepticon Hunt becomes apparent when their hidden home is found by Ravage, Frenzy, and Lazerbeak try to hide from Elita-1. Rung grants the three sanctuary although greatly concerned about this troubling news.

Soundwave later arrives who briefs everyone about the suspicions on G.H.O.S.T like Mandroid as gratitude for keeping the cassettes safe. A new side to this conflict becomes forged. Keep the rogue Decepticons out of G.H.O.S.T's hands and investigate what's really going on.

Shenanigans

Decepticons meet sassy young adults. All of them still wonder how Rung even found these very strange organics. Most agree that Jak and Daxter are more Decepticon aligned. At least they can reign in the Cassettes.

Jak refuses to throw hands with the Malto kids(human and Terrans). He's already angry that they're being brought into this mess. Rage is aimed at the adult Cybertronians mainly Megatron.

Demolition Duo disguise themselves as bots whenever involved in GHOST activity. Team Autobots are stunned to see a live Predacon specifically a youngling. Or how hostile Ramjak is from the nasty injuries left on Optimus' frame.

Rung decides to be the 'mysterious guide' for the Terrans. Leaving clues about GHOST's true intentions and guidance should they feel lost. The kids share these findings with Bee.

Surprise team up between Jawbreaker, Citrus Bolt and Ramjak. The Maltobot realizes who the Predacon is but promises to keep his identity secret. Jawbreaker gets an older brother figure in Jak.

Mandroid is suspicious about the Demolition Duo while Croft only sees the two as another regular threat to eliminate. When Dark Jak is unleashed on GHOST headquarters does the latter change her tune. Caught Decepticons are now loose while more incriminating evidence is found by the Autobots.

Hidden identities are revealed and the final battle goes WAY DIFFERENT. Light Jak overwrites Death Ray into Healing Ray via channeling before it can fire. Daxter helps Twitch and Thrash kick Mandroid's ass. Rung chastises Quintus.

Mandroid is put under watch, his body fully restored. Old colleagues have a long needed chat. Jak apologizes to Alex for betraying their friendship. The fatherly Malto has him make up for it by looking over the kids. Jak doesn't mind although Dax might be a bad influence. Rung happily provides therapy.

Prime/Rescue Bots

The family of three lives near an undiscovered Energon mine containing various Energon types. A place where they practice channeling these particular crystals. Their peace is broken when scouting Vehicons find their home.

Jak trashes them and hijacks one to sneak onto the Nemesis. An action that leads to Cliffjumper's life being saved while the onboard Decepticons learn why its important to do body scans. The injured bot is taken to Rung for repairs and the three learn the war is going on here.

Soon Team Prime arrives for Cliffjumper only to be shocked by the bot nonchalantly telling stories to the Demolition Duo whilst drinking some Energon. The family is put under protection and the mine becomes a hidden Autobot provision.

Neither side are aware about Rung nor his sons' capabilities. Something that soon becomes known when Megatron returns...and Dark Energon comes into play. The war flips completely.

Shenanigans

Guardian Cliffjumper for Demolition Duo. Ratchet struggles to keep his sanity as the three and Miko become absolute menaces together. Arcee mostly upholds the peace (alongside wrench tossing protection) partly because the family did save her partner.

Rung is unnerved by the Matrix of Leadership Optimus has. It feels like someone had not only tamper with the relic but angered it too. Everyone but Jak and Daxter are unaware of Optimus' broken spark(Orion) slowly repairing.

Bots try to understand where the hell did these small yet powerful organics came from. Jak continues to be a menace while Daxter sabotages things. Shit blows up either way and the humans are the only ones nonchalant about it.

Channeling Dark Energon = Meeting Unicron. Or eldritch deity gets harassed by two youngish adults. Rung further assists them in being a menace much to Unicron's horror.

Shockwave and the Predacons appear way early once Ramjak alongside Citrus Bolt take stage. No one knows how the Demolition Duo can turn into Cybertronians. Predaking and his kin seek to make Jak part of their pack.

Odd family meets Team Rescue Bots. Rung pretends to be a therapy bot for Griffin Rock. Jak and Daxter learn the ropes of rescue. Griffin Rock feels like Sandover Village but in a more genuine way. It eases the homesickness in the Demolition Duo's hearts. Rung considers on getting a second home here.

Rescue Bots become impromptu rescue teachers. Jak has a rough time adjusting to a non-combat situation but everyone pitches in to help. Boulder proves to be a great mediator.

Cody gets two older brother figures who are happy to listen. Jak gets to exercise his inner child even when his dark side wants to join. Cody doesn't mind and happily pats Dark Jak on the head.

Bayverse

The family of three live outside Mission City. Rung had sensed the Allspark/Cube so he might've stolen it from Sector Seven then relocate the object far away from the frozen Megatron. Jak works at a car shop and befriends Mikaela. Daxter bought some of Sam's stuff including the glasses as he felt a bit bad for the kid. (Jak picked it up due to obvious reasons.)

Everything is fine until Bumblebee sends out the signal to his fellow Autobots. Barricade attacks Jak only to immediately retreat upon nearly being torn apart by Dark Jak's claws. Rung avoids getting caught around a patrolling Starscream when he checks up on the Cube.

Daxter isn't so lucky as Frenzy attacks him during a nighttime stroll. Bumblebee, alongside Sam and Mikaela, finds the ottsel after he repels the Decepticon. Daxter almost reluctantly gets taken to meet the Autobots but evades the three.

The odd family now know the four million year long civil war exists here too. Pieces are already in play so they run into action. Especially when everyone knows Jak has the glasses.

Shenanigans

Manhunting your previous buyer is awful customer service even if there's a good reason for it. Jak choses to be a gremlin as he doesn't feel like being shoddily kidnapped by bots clearly unfamiliar with Earth. Daxter tops it via his incredible sense of sass.

Impromptu house visit while your dorky robodad psychoanalyze war criminals. Sam gets a Peacemaker aimed at his head and Optimus barely manages to diffuse the situation. A certain Ottsel complains that the asscrack of night isn't a good time for insanity.

Cube doesn't get destroyed and kept hidden: Pro. Battle of Mission City never happens: Pro. Megatron still gets freed, Decepticons are on the loose and NEST isn't formed: Oh boy.

Jak? Ironhide's Weapons Specialist in training. Daxter and Jazz get along like a house set ablaze. Rung becomes the center of attention with story requests about his two sons.

More Autobots = More child leashes. You know it's bad when the young man recovering from his Prime Complex has more common sense. Good thing Light Ramjak can fly the troublemakers back to base by the scruff.

Military is completely confused by sudden appearances of giant robots, blue angel and draconic devils. A certain William Lennox finds out the truth by sheer accident during a Decepticon scuffle. Funnily enough, Daxter is the weirdest thing this guy has seen. Rung comes in second place.

Relationship advice given by an ottsel keeps Mikaela and Sam from breaking up. Everyone didn't expect for Daxter to have any experience in the love department. Man feels super offended.

Countless humiliations leads to Megatron raising the white flag. Sentinel Prime gets blown apart before even firing a single shot as no one tries to kill Ironhide with an accelerated disease gun. War finally ends and there are no more casualties.

And that's it for now! Until next time folks, I'll see back at Spargus. Transform and Roll Out!

[oraclekleo]

Update:

So I have been up to some things during the weekend, was pretty busy.

My sister came for a visit and because she went by car, she brought me a water melon! Yummy! It's 18 kg, though. I still have a second half of it here with me. It's so much of a water melon! 😂 They didn't have smaller in the store. So I guess I'm just gonna eat nothing else but a melon today (just as I did yesterday and day before... too much of a water melon).

My sister also volunteered to be my test dummy for me to learn how to hypnotise people. It went well from the beginning. I managed to calibrate my voice to a calming monotonous tone, I was slowly guiding her towards calm and relaxation of her body... Then I wanted to guide her to the deepest level of calm and relaxation and the usual way how to do it is to tell the person you are hypnotising to imagine themselves at the top of stairs and with each step down they take, they become more and more relaxed and calm, right? So I did just that and...

MY DUMBASS SISTER TRIPPED ON THE VERY FIRST STEP OF THE IMAGINARY STAIRS AND ROLLED DOWN!

No joke! I told her to take a first step and she suddenly twitched and started laughing telling me she tripped on the stairs! How wrecked does your brain have to be that it makes you trip on imaginary stairs? 😂 So there was no way we could continue. We will try again next time but I'll probably use different metaphor than the stairs. 😂

Apart from making my sister roll down imaginary stairs, I was sorting clothes this weekend. It's becoming hotter so I need to unpack the summer clothes. I also still have so much of mom's clothes here. She passed away nearly a year ago and it's time for me to just put it all away but it's pretty hard to do. I'm gonna be donating a great deal of of it all to charity. But it's not a finished process, there's still a lot of work to be done.

I have also set up a little private tarot corner for myself.

It's cute and in a place where my home office screens and laptop used to be.

I also had a weird dream... I described it to my friend so let me just copy/paste the messages so I don't have to type it all down again:

Although… I did have a dream last night… No dogs involved 😂 Which is already weird, right? But it was like… I had a guy friend… I don't remember his face clearly… I only know he had like black longer and slightly wavy hair. Probably a latino type? I'm not sure. Anyway! I was on video call with him and while the dogs weren't present in the dream, he said he liked the last vid I shared where I cuddled Dachi in the morning in bed (why would I record it and also share with anyone, I don't know) and that he's envious of it. And because it's something I hear all the time that people are envious about my dogs' life, I was just joking about it. But he seemed to be a bit fixated on the topic and started to asking what he would have to do to be also cuddled like that by me. And clearly we had a video call because he was far away so I brought up the geographical distance. And he suggested he could visit me and kept asking whether I would give him a cuddle and head scratch (thanks for putting this into my dreams, btw.) if he came for a visit. So I wanted to turn it into a joke and told him only if he wears a collar. I'm starting to feel like I'm dodging a bullet in the dream but that guy says he's booking a flight right now. And then I woke up because dogs smelled a fox a or cat outside through the open windows or something and growled and barked… Anyway, in like 2 minutes I fell back asleep And I was back in that dream only… like… later on. And I was living in my own house, not in an apartment. In a house with a garden. And interestingly enough with one of my former co-workers as my roommate (female co-worker). But the house still had like guest bedroom and this latino vibe giving guy for a visit and was in that guest room, apparently. And in that dream… It's a bit confusing for a little. I think he sent me a text message that he's waiting in bed for the morning cuddles and also sent a me selfie with him wearing a collar. I still have no idea what his face looked like but the collar was purple… like bright purple colour. I did went to see him in the bedroom. He did have a pretty torso and neck, yes 🤣 And I remember like combing his hair with my fingers and his hair was like really nice, too. That was good. I don't know what products he used but worked great 😂 I should have asked… Yeah… This guy was like purring and burying his face into my neck as I was scratching his head. That was a bit… too touchy for my usual taste but clearly I didn't mind in the dream too much. I mean, I also usually don't have this type of dreams. Must be all the audios I listen to recently 😂 They start rewiring my brain to be more open towards physical intimacy 

So yeah... That's what I have been up to this weekend.

How did you do?

[marvin-wtf]

Just an old fanfic I did back in the day, about Wednesday lol

I had uploaded it to Ao3 but I said to myself, why not upload it here too? There are two parts, it is possible that I will upload the second part later or tomorrow, enjoy :D OH YES SORRY FOR THE BAD ENGLISH OK-

The day had passed normally at Nevermore School. the students did what they wanted, after all, they were teenagers, and we all know how they can be. Meanwhile, Wednesday and Enid were in one of the rooms, the roomies who had little or nothing in common, but who managed to take their strange friendship one step further. Wednesday would never admit that she is Enid's girlfriend, yet everyone knows it because that wolf cub would not stop yelling it right in the face of anyone who was interested in hearing it.

They were both on the colorful side of the room, Wednesday just wanted to be free of all that black for a moment, change the scene to see if she could get some inspiration for her novel, which clearly didn't work out but she was comfortable since Enid was lying down on her lap looking at her phone.

Enid was begging for a long time for caresses from the brunette until she finally agreed, that could de-stress her a bit, she was thinking for a long time, she deserved it. She gave soft caresses to the werewolf's stomach, mostly to make her feel good. While she saw her reactions out of the corner of her eye, she had noticed that Enid at times moved her leg as if she were a dog, what made her curious.

“Your leg… doesn’t stop moving every time I scratch you” Wednesday said with a soft tone, although her face remained expressionless.

“Huh?” Enid looked away from her pone to see her girlfriend, the looked down at her belly “Oh, yeah. That happens haha! It’s like an involuntary reflex”

“a reflex?” She did not hesitate to scratch a little more to see her girlfriend’s leg moving again.

“Yep! It’s like dog. Weird, isn’t it?”

“More than weird is… curious, I guess. Apparently causes knismesis”

“...Kni what?” tilt her head like the confused puppy that she is.

“Knismesis, the kind of tickle that don’t make you laugh but causes you to move the leg, and there’s the other kind, Gargalesis” While scratching the blonde’s torso she had begun to fit her fingers a little. “Those are the ones that produce laughter, that everyone usually does”

“¡EEK!” She squealed due to the sudden tickling and reflexively slapped Wednesday’s hand. Realizing what she did, and that in fact, her girlfriend was staring at her with a shocked expression had scared Enid “Wednesday I’m sorry! I-I didn’t… I-I…”

“Hm… Do you know Enid? Tickling at some point in history was considered torture, not foy physical harm, it didn’t leave a single scar” She dug her fingers into Enid's stomach again, causing her body to tense. “All the damage was psychological, they spent hours and hours tickling the victims” Wednesday began to slowly move her fingers, slowly increasing the pace as she spoke.

“P-Pff O-Okay okay understood, do you want to sto-” and was interrupted by Wednesday's talk.

“They came to spend days in torture, even months just laughing non-stop while all those tickles tormented their bodies.” Despite talking about something as silly as tickling and, by the way, doing it, she looked serious and that intimidated the blonde, so she doesn't move from her place. Her fingers moved all over her torso, digging and scratching without stopping, when Enid wanted to stop her, Wednesday moved her hand to another side further away from her girlfriend's hand.

“H-Hahahahahaha!! W-Wednesday!” She looked up again to see her brunette girlfriend “I-I Gehehehehe it!! Cahahahahan you sto-pfff!!” At this rate she was laughing out loud, Enid was starting to kick as the tickles were too precise, it was like Wednesday knew where to attack.

“Something like that was how the victims begged, no matter how much they asked for mercy they never stopped, at least until they fainted from lack of air. I'd really like to try that method, but I can't find anyone ticklish enough to push them to that limit.” That last one seemed more like a joke, but no one knew that, she said it so seriously.

At this point, the blonde was laughing uncontrollably, twisting her body as she kicked, even cowering to try and cover herself, but nothing was working. “HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! W-WEHEHEHEHDNESDAHAHAHAY!!!”

“Tell me, Enid” She looks down to finally notice her girlfriend. A small smile forms on her lips from the way she laughs and twists, she thought her desperate laugh was so cute, but she wasn't going to say it out loud.

“STOHOHOHOHOHOP IT!!” The brunette nods her head removing her hand from the body of the little puppy who was still laughing while taking a breath, a couple of tears in her eyes. “Y-You… *chuckles* you're good…at this”

“Meh, I only read some of the techniques in the torture books”

Enid had risen from Wednesday's legs to sit on the bed beside her. Despite having laughed so much, she looks already recovered, a werewolf thing. "You know? When someone tickles you and stops, it's legal to tickle that other person”

“Yeah, you can see that I don’t have”

“Really? Is that an invitation to find some sensitive spot on your body, honey?” she had a mischievous grin on her face, she even raised her hands wiggling her fingers a little.

“If that’s what you prefer to do all night, go ahead” Her voice was firm. Wednesday was sure of herself… but was what she said it right? What if Enid could find some weak spot in her?

Stay tuned.

[1-more-chapter-until-i-pass-out]

Lets talk about one of my OC's because she is my child

So here she is! Her name's Dakota. She isn't from any fandom. She's from an original story which is still painfully in progress, entitled "Seedling of a Flame".

(her shirt is supposed to be a different purple but idk what happened to my pen??? It was great all the other times I used it.)

(oh heres the reference if you want to use it)

So basically, people can have powers based off an element. Fire, nature, water, air, earth, light and darkness. You can be granted powers from a Creature. There are seven (7) in total, one for each element. So the fire creature can only grant fire powers, the water creature water powers, etc. (Your eyes also change colour depending on what power you get.) These creatures can shapeshift, so if they wanted to they could turn into your babushka and break into your house playing the saxophone and wearing baguettes as slippers.

And darkness isn't evil like in other fantasy books. Any element can be evil depending on who is using it and how.

Dakota wants nature powers. But while trying to find the nature creature, she helps an injured animal which turns out to be the fire creature, who gives her fire powers. Which she does not want. So she tries to find the fire creature again so it can take her fire powers away, then go look for the Nature Creature again.

Her character development or whatever will be going from a calm, tranquil and rather gentle girl to a raging, hecking strong girl with anger issues. Because we love that.

Honestly she'll kinda start out like a Disney princess, in some ways.

Although, Dakota does not love it, like here's a quote I decided she should say about how she changes/while fighting someone who says something about her fire powers and her desire to have nature powers -

"My lungs are full of thorns, my bones held together by vines, and my heart by groves of trees is adorned,"

But that doesn't sound that well so someone helped me change it into this -

"Thorns fill my lungs. My bones are held by vines. My heart, it beats to the rhythm of orchards."

She is super strong, like physically. Could beat you in a fist fight. Can also make you roadty toasty so you die. Wouldn't intentionally k!ll, but would harm.

I'm thinking that she's going to buy a sword from a guy so she don't have to use her fire powers, but then it turns out that the sword can kinda like absorb/copy her powers so it can set alight.

And she will also find a dog (black furred, male Newfoundland) and will basically just adopt it. The newfoundland, who will probably be called Ink unless I change my mind, will have somehow managed to get Earth powers. It will remain a mystery and running gag throughout the book.

(if anyone has any dog drawing reference pictures, please please show them to me because I really need to figure out how to draw dogs, thank you)

Plus, she will also "accidentally" k!ll someone. Accidentally meaning she didn't do it but she thought she did. So she'd be fighting some people with her fire and one of the people she's fighting also have fire powers. They k!ll Dakota's sort of friend,but she was too caught up in anger to see that it wasn't her who k!lled the person.

And that will lead up to Dakota meeting another person who is like a rival person (with water powers). He sort of likes her but Dakota hates him and there's going to be a really cool moment where him and Dakota are fighting using their powers and Dakota's fire will get so hot it'll evaporate his water.

Often helps Dakota escape from the people who knew the de@d person. Because the people want Dakota to explain what happened, but Dakota is absolutely panicking and just so broken that she apparently k!lled someone. Dakota doesn't want or need his help, however.

I made a Picrew of him. Here -

Picrew link - https://picrew.me/image_maker/1374338

(gonna be super upset if the link don't work)

But then Dakota will so meet a princess who doesn't want to be Queen, so she helps her escape and they travel together and start liking each other, but maybe the princess with d!e before they can tell each other.

The princess has light powers and will look a bit like this -

Picrew link - https://picrew.me/image_maker/1456483

I might call her something like Thalia or Willow.

Some drawings of mine (not the best but they'll do for now) -

Honestly this was mostly written to satisfy me and also get a bit more organised, but if I want to I'll make part 2 or 3 for Dakota and maybe do this for other ocs and stories, because I have plenty.

[backyard-homesteader]

Canning Plums

As you might recall, I recently had a record plum harvest. Which meant that last weekend I had to do something with all those plums. They don’t keep for very long, and just as importantly, I want to be able to use my fridge again. And so with the dulcet tones of my dogs using their bones as percussion instruments in the background, I rolled up my sleeves, washed my hands, and got to work canning.

I like canning. I really do. But it’s a lot of time and a lot of work. After the first hour of chopping plums, I decided my audiobook was the only thing keeping me sane. My dogs apparently thought I was spending too much time in the kitchen for them to lie on the floor at my feet like peasants, so they dragged chairs over from the living room so they could watch me in comfort.

More plums were eaten as I chopped them into quarters and tossed them in the pot. I'm fairly certain my older dog was stealing from the bin of unwashed plums on the counter when I wasn’t looking.

It took just over half a bin to fill the pot up. When I said I had more plums than last year, I was severely underestimating just how many more. Last year I had one full pot of compote when all was said and done. This year I still had mountains of plums to go. I realized that I should have tried to give more plums away. That I wouldn't have enough jars.

This was supposed to be the year I got everything right. Last year was more than a bit chaotic to say the least, with me having to run out to the hardware store for more jars in the middle of my canning while my partner babysat the pot. And it looked like history was about to repeat itself. Oops. I'll get it right one day.

Time to start cooking.

Unfortunately, as the pot started to warm and the smell of plums began to fill the kitchen, I ran into another snag.

On the second stir of the pot, my spoon broke. So much for a special plastic canning spoon. I was forced to turn off the stove, pause my jam making, and run to the store.

Upon my return with three more flats of jars and a spatula, the only metal implement I could find for less than twenty dollars, I washed everything again, turned on the stove, and got back to work.

I like to heat the plums up just enough to bubble. Plums, especially this variety, are already quite high in pectin, so I didn't need to add any more. Although sugar is often used in canning because of its role as a preserving agent, I don’t usually add any of that either. I try to avoid excess sugar where I can, and I find the plums are already quite sweet on their own.

Between my canning utensils, multiple pots, and towels spread across the counter for cooling jars, my setup took over the entire kitchen. Canning doesn’t need a lot of fancy equipment. Tongs, jar tongs, a pot big enough to fit all your jars with an inch of water on every side, and some oven mitts. The fruit and jars should both be hot when you’re working with them, and the oven mitts are a good precaution in case you forget yourself and use your hands to grab a jar instead of the tongs.

Quick safety tip. Oven mitts don't work when they're wet. I don't think I need to explain how I found that one out.

Before you start canning, make sure you check what lids you're using, and look up what sanitizing and sealing technique you should be using to match. How to sanitize and seal them can vary from manufacturer to manufacturer, and year to year.

While the fruit finished cooking, I boiled the first set of jars to sanitize them.

Swapping my metal spatula for a jar safe plastic soup ladle, I filled the freshly boiled jars, leaving only a light centimeter of headspace. Or quarter inch, for those of you who use freedom units. With a clean cloth I wiped off the rim to ensure no food would get in the way of the seal. Finally, I ran a heat safe plastic chopstick around the side of the jar to pull out the worst of the bubbles. A wooden stir stick should be safe if it's new, but it's generally best to avoid wooden utensils when canning as they can harbor bacteria. Metal utensils can damage the jars. I might have gotten a metal spatula to stir the pot after my piece of junk plastic spoon snapped, but I'm careful to never bring it close to the jars.

Once the jars were ready to go, I screwed on the lids and lowered them into the boiling water. It takes ten minutes of boiling for the seals to properly form. When the time is up, they can be lifted back out of the pot and set on the counter to cool. It is vitally important that you do not mess with the lids at this step. I know it is so incredibly tempting to check on the lids and give them a little wiggle. Or maybe that’s just a me problem. But either way, it can cause the seals to fail and your work to come to naught.

I’ve added a couple of links at the bottom of the post if you're interested in trying out canning for yourself. They're very informative and have reliable, safe instructions. Canning is easy, but it's possible to make yourself or anyone you feed your canning to seriously sick if you mess up. I don't say that to discourage anyone. I say it because it's just something to be aware of should you want to give it a try.

It alternated between frantically busy and literally waiting for a pot to boil. I tidied my kitchen and put away some dishes while I waited. Drew some plans for a new bedframe. That sort of thing.

To make sure things went as quickly as possible, I always had jars in my pot and a full kettle of hot water on standby for top ups. When you spend hours boiling water, you lose a lot to evaporation.

The canning went significantly faster with the new jars. While I was browsing the selection at the hardware store, I noticed that the 500 mL jars were the same price as the 250 mL ones that I normally used. They were also the same width, which meant that I could fit the same number in the pot. By switching jars, I was quite literally doubling my speed. I felt like an idiot for taking so long to realize. But constantly learning is one of the joys of life, and it’s never too late to start something new.

I cooked and canned three pots. As I worked, I started realizing I may not have bought enough new jars. There was nothing to be done about it, however. The hardware store had long since closed for the night. That was when I remembered my uncle’s suggestion of dehydrating some plums. The idea, initially dismissed, suddenly seemed incredibly appealing. I started slicing plums in half and filling up the dehydrator trays.

When all the trays were fully loaded, I still had plums left. Resigned to my fate, I returned to slicing them up for the pot. By the time I had finally sliced up the last plum, I had another half pot to cook. Although I had to scrounge around and dig up a few mismatched jars, I managed to find enough to finish the job. I also had exactly enough compote to fill the final jar to the brim. It was such a satisfying feeling.

My fingers were stained brown, and my entire kitchen seemed like it was sticky, but I was done. Well, done for twenty-four hours, until it was time to test all the seals on the jars. As the jars cooled, I cleaned up the kitchen, listening to the popping of the lids as the seals set. To my pleasant surprise, I only had one jar fail this batch. Not feeling like boiling my pot of water all over again for a single jar, I simply cracked it open and ate the compote with toast and cheese.

I have so much compote. Some of it I’ll give away. It makes lovely holiday gifts. The rest of it I’ll find a way to use up. Somehow…

[mytastessuck]

Bo Burnham: what. (Full Show)

Welcome to my first live show review and the last (sort-of) album review I'll do for this era of the blog.

I've been a fan of Bo Burnham since I saw the "Words Words Words" music video on Comedy Central when I was in my teens. Then I saw the live show for that and I was hooked, making a channel for him on Pandora (remember that) and looking up everything he did for music. I even got the Egghead poetry book for Christmas. I'm proud to say that, while his older stuff really doesn't hold up, he's more than noticed and has evolved to stay with the times, which I'm certain he's proud that he still meets my high standards for performers. And speaking of performers...for this review, I will be going by the tracklisting on the album instead of events as they happen in the show because the jokes are...pretty decent actually but I don't feel like stopping to rank each and every one, especially when they're so quick and simple. I want to go into his songs instead of his actual moments of stand-up because, like Kaiser Neko (or maybe it was Lanipator?) once sort of criticized, I think he's a better performer than a comedian. He knows how to sign, compose and play to a crowd better than carry an entire show with just jokes. So that's what I'll be focusing on. Thanks for reading the ramble and enjoy this review of the free show.

Intro

Like I said, better performer than comedian. Watch him do a bunch of pre-planned gags to a great track and make it all work with little moments of prop humor. Best bits include "Prolonged Eye Contact" and the moment where he spits up the invisible water.

Track Score: 10/10

2. A World On Fire

I don't care if it's quicker than his jokes. This is a solid gag.

Track Score: 8/10

3. Sad

As a person with empathy issues, I know exactly how debilitating it is to possess when the world sucks so much. So good on Bo for making a song that makes fun of it. Good on him.

Track Score: 9/10

4. I Fuck Sluts

Didn't need the purpose of the poem explained at the end but I get that's part of the joke. Excellent show of how misogyny can develop in others though.

Track Score: 9/10

5. What Did I Do Last Night?

Better quick joke. Love it lots and it's always what I think of when I hear the title phrase.

Track Score: 10/10

6. Let Brain, Right Brain

Cool song with a cool concept. It's interesting to see a guy therapize himself on stage and he gives life to both parts of his brain in interesting ways. This is why he acts now on occasion.

Track Score: 9/10

7. #deep

#justsmartassthings. Funny song. I forgot how well he could sing while still messing around.

Track Score: 9/10

8. Beating Off In A Minor

Really need to see this one on video to appreciate it. Even those without a penis can barely handle the second-hand cringe...

Track Score: 10/10

9. Poems

They're alright, though you're better off just getting the book. I personally recommend Perfect.

Track Score: 7/10

10. From God's Perspective

Alright, the crown jewel of the show. Still holds up today, even the rape line surprisingly. Although getting so judgemental over people abstaining from pork might offend Haram or Kashrut followers...either way, still worth a listen.

Track Score: 9/10

11. Andy The Frog

Bit of a meh shaggy dog story. Not even bad, just not on the caliber of the other parts of the show.

Track Score: 6/10

12. Out Of The Abyss

See, on the CD, this is Bo interacting with a fourteen year old attending the concert with his mother by using the joke we see in the video of a pedophile trying to lure in a child with a candy bar. He also tells a girl who loves him that she doesn't and explains what a parasocial relationship. So listen to that when you have the chance instead of the show which is just the pedophile joke by its lonely self.

Track Score (live show): 7/10

13. Repeat Stuff

This was a single and it deserved to be because Bo went off with this one. Pop, idol music, teen bop? They've apparently had it too good for too long because Bo tears them apart and still has time to get the audience to participate in a mini-rally while he does so. Probably his best work...and still relevant!

Track score: 10/10

14. We Think We Know You

Damn...greatest way to end the show. You know, for a while, TV Tropes had a entry called Becoming The Mask on Bo's page that accused Bo of becoming lost in his stage persona for a while. Their sources? Some fans...yeah, remember to stay woke on stupid wikis, guys. It's still there...so this song will always be relevant.

Track Score: 11/10

Show Score: 8.9/10

Gonna take a break for the rest of the week then, and I might be lowballing here, but I think I'll have the rest of the songs taken care of in a few weeks. See you then!

[vault81]

OC Interview

I was tagged by @orionlancasterr to do an OC Interview! So here is Jacks! (though I may edit this later with more of them)

"Oh- you uh wanna interview me? fuck it why not! ask away!"

name:

"I go by Jack mainly, but I guess you want 'ma 'government name'"

He starts biting down on his lip while his eyes scan the room

"I think it's Jack Andrew Cooke, ha! It's been a hot minute since I had to remember that one! Not used that since the G.O.A.T! exam!"

nickname:

"My nickname? most folks just call me 'courier' or 'six' but back east people did start calling me 'the lone wanderer', That one doesn't exactly roll off the tongue like the other two though."

gender:

"I'm a male! or man! dude works too!"

star sign:

"Uhhh what's my what?"

After being told what a star sign is, he begins counting on his fingers to work out when exactly his birthday is and what that'd make him, breaking out in a bright wide-eyed smile when he finally figured it out.

"I'm a libertarian! Oh- Arcade say's I'm wrong, apparently it's 'Libra', close enough in my book."

personality type:

"My personality type? uh, I'm a nice guy, I guess? I can be a bit dense sometimes, but I try not to be mean or rude.. wait, that's not what the question means does it?"

height:

"The last time my height got checked out, I think I just shy of 6'3? no wait! Arcade is around my height! and he's 6'3 I think? so yeah! I must be!"

orientation:

"Uh- hold on, lemme check my compass.."

He tries to stop himself from laughing, as if he just made the funniest joke in the world

"Bahahahaha! d'ya get it?! orientation, compas- oh okay I guess It wasn't as funny as I thought... uh- I suppose you could say I'm into guys, always have been I suppose.."

nationality/ethnicity:

"American! I'm sure 'liza said we had some Scottish in us too, Wherever that is!"

favourite fruit:

"Hmmm I'm gonna say Watermelon! They didn't grow 'em often down in the vault, so when they did, it was always for a special occasion! I haven't found anything out here that compares to them yet!"

favourite season:

"Winter! I absolutely hate the heat- yeah I know I live in a desert whatever! But I just love when it gets freezing, wrapping up warm in front of a fire and getting all cozy! and the snow! I love snow!"

favourite flower/scent:

"Lavender, I think it's just for the smell really. It reminds me of home, 'specially Old Lady Palmer! she used to smell like that when she'd come and babysit us! It's just become a comforting scent I guess, If that even is a thing?"

A smile crosses his lips as he closes his eyes, softening as he briefly relives those early years of his childhood

coffee/tea/hot chocolate:

"I'm gonna go with hot chocolate! I don't like how bitter coffee can be, besides It messes with my stomach, so I can't really drink it anyway!"

average hours of sleep:

"7-8 hours I'd guess.. used to be I'd be getting 'round 9-10 but we're always on the move these days so I've gotta be up early!"

"Although good luck waking me up! I sleep like a brick!"

dog or cat person:

"Dogs! Dog's all the way! One of our first adventures outside of the Vault me and 'liza found a dog! he kinda just kept following us around, think his owner died or something, we ended up calling him Dogmeat!"

He smiles, looking down at his pipboy, a picture of a blue heeler smiling away while it gets a bath is on the screen.

"'course we had to give Dogmeat away when we left D.C, he was getting old by that point, so it was best for him. Besides, he's in good hands with Moira!"

dream trip:

"My dream trip? ya'know I don't think I really have a 'dream trip' never had a place that I've been dying to go! guess you could say I've always been about the journey rather than the destination."

favourite fictional/real character:

"Hmmm.. think I'm gonna say The Mechanist! what's not to love about a dude with a robot army?! I mean yeah he was a villain but rule of cool overrules I think!"

"Ya know that reminds me I actually met 'The Mechanist' a coupla years ago.. fought a 'gal dressed up as The Antagoniser, but I'll save that story for later!"

number of blankets you sleep with:

"I actually don't sleep with a blanket most nights, my body runs too hot! I end up overheating under those things, Arcade compares me to a human furnace, so he ends up hogging 'em all!"

random fact:

"I'm actually allergic to some types of medicine! my eyes get all itchy and swell up! mainly ibuprofen that does that one... I just pop a anti-histamine and I'm right as rain though!"

Jack jumps to his feet stretching out all his limbs and gestures to the door

"Now, was that all? I got a few errands to run for the Followers over in Freeside!"

Since I'm not too sure who to tag (idk who else has done this or not) I'll just leave it open for anyone who else who wants to do it!

[thebaepatricia]

Over the Weekend: Training Maxes

Over the weekend, Dani and I worked on my training maxes.

It was a long time coming and delaying it further was starting to make me antsy - rightfully so as knowing my training maxes would solidify my working sets and let me actually progress while working within my strength range - away from injuries and ego lifting.

It was interesting to know that I had more in my tank than I assumed. Interesting, but not really surprising as I pride myself in being a conservative lifter albeit it not really being a badge of honor or a good flex.

I had an ambitious goal to train all maxes within one gym session. It appeared ambitious mostly because I was naive. I didn't anticipate not having the energy for such a long session. I had the drive, but also needed to be practical.

We were able to also finally see the gym near the Navarro marketplace (Fitholic Gym). Long story short, it was not good enough for our standards. I decided it was best to go back home, rest for a bit, and re-try training in the afternoon.

While we're there, we made the most of the distance and walked the entire 3.15km home. It was scorching hot to say the least and it was post-semi gym session, which made it more challenging. It wasn't like I had any other choice though. By the time I wanted to throw in the towel, we were a few feet away from the subdivision gate and it would be lame hitching a tricycle ride for 1 more minute.

The best part from killing ourselves over walking under the heat of the sun was coming home to my new squat shoes waiting for me at the guard house.

Saturday

We trained my Zercher squats and I managed to go up to 80 kg. That was surprising for me. The few times I attempted to go heavy, I couldn't do more than 60 or 62.5kg. Of course that was also my attempt at sticking within my comfort zone. For progressive overload, that's the last thing you want to do.

My new shoes helped a lot. Plus, the fact that I finally tried on my knee sleeves. It was challenging to put on, but they gave in eventually. The shoes fit so well and I appreciate the fact that it's spacious on the toes area. The soles are properly heavy and, aesthetically, it looks nice. Apparently, white suits me.

Sunday

We didn't have enough time to train my bench press although I was mostly excited for that compound. So we decided to continue the next day before Dani went home.

I was surprised (and a tad disappointed) that I my training max was close to my normal working set. I guess because it's my favorite so I was expecting a bit more. I managed to do until 55 kg decently.

Dani was supposed to head home that evening, but his back hurt (a personal rating of 8 out of 10), so we gave him medicine and let him lay down for a bit.

Monday

We did the morning walk (3km) with Dani holding a stick because I was too frightened to walk the streets with too many stray dogs guarding the premises.

He headed home that late afternoon, but before he did, I decided we could test out my deadlift max while he was still around to coach me and spot me, if needed. I didn't eat heavy breakfast that morning since I wasn't planning to do the deadlift max. This resulted in me being a bit underfed for the session. I ate macaroni salad as my intra-workout snack.

With Dani's encouragement, my trash motivational pop music, bites of macaroni salad in between sets, and lots of pep talk, I was able to pull 135 kg as my best training rep.

_____

I've always been a late bloomer. Perhaps my multiple setbacks caused by doubts, lack of confidence, injury, minimal support system, and everything else were actually vital in molding me into the person I am today.

Had I not been marinated into all those odds and excuses in the past, I wouldn't appreciate my journey today and I would have no wake up call to snap me back to reality and make me see my own potentials.

Anyway, here are some photos from Saturday afternoon during the failed palengke gym session: