#apologies for the rambling i'm not the best with words but i had a lot of thoughts
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aquareegia · 11 months ago
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I just wanted to add my two cents in regards to Will's Sleep Token essay. As I'm not the best in articulating myself adequately, this is very rambly but alas.
I think Will and I have a very similar view on metal. Back when I first started listening to metal, I started with mostly death metal and melodic death metal and while I still like some of those bands, it lost the spark for me over time. I had the feeling that there isn't a lot of variation and that a lot of bands follow the same specific formula, which bored me personally.
That only changed once I started branching out into the realms of j-rock and especially metalcore. I know a lot of elitists shit on metalcore specifically because it doesn't follow this specific outdated formula of metal and therefore is deemed as "not heavy enough" and simply "not metal". I've always thought that's utter bullshit.
I love that bands, especially nowadays, are not afraid to experiment with sounds and vocals. I love that they have the ability to reach people outside the metal scene too. I love the fact that metal is becoming more popular amongst the newer generations of music fans. And I love that other metal subgenres have been slowly branching out as well. Metalcore made me realise that there is much more to metal and it made me appreciate the genre more as a whole. I think this is also why I get so passionate when people try to diminish metalcore's influence and deny it's validity in the scene.
But to get on the topic of Sleep Token... I get a very similar feeling from this band too. For several years I haven't really been an active music listener and didn't keep up with a lot of bands, because I was just so depressed, that I didn't find much joy in anything. I was about to hit rock bottom once again but then I heard Sleep Token. Their music has felt like a warm embrace of a dear friend. Like a helping hand dragging you out of the ocean when you're about to get swallowed by the waves. I've never gotten this sense of belonging and being undestood from any other musical artist before. At least not to this extent. Not only have they helped me personally more than I could ever put into words, they have reignited my love for metal and music as a whole once again.
Sleep Token are a collective of incredibly talented musicians and no matter how much some want to deny it, they are a band that is one of a kind. That is because Vessel is a hugely unique artist. I have praised him multiple times already so I'll keep it short this time (I'll try at least). Similar to Will, what really drives me towards Sleep Token are Vessel's vocals. His way with words and his delivery to me is absolutely unique in the way how unapologetically emotional he is. Despite obviously being a skilled and polished singer, he still has a certain rawness and imperfection that oddly enough makes the songs as a whole perfect. And as I said multiple times before, I think a huge part of why he can be so vulnerable is because he is anonymous. Instead of putting his face out he's putting out his heart and soul and you can truly feel the rawness of emotions in everything that man puts out. Which, again, is why the anonymity is much more than an interesting gimmick to distinguish them from other bands.
A lot of modern bands are currently changing and expanding the sound of metal and Sleep Token is definitely one of those bands too. They are a breath of fresh air that is definitely needed to demolish those outdated views of how metal should look and sound like.
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jeonginsleftcheek · 4 months ago
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A little help and more
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pairing: virgin!felix x virgin!afab!reader x experienced!chan
genre: smut, fluff
word count: 5.7k
description: felix and you need a little guidance and chris is more than happy to assist.
warnings: threesome(obviously), sub!felix, switch!reader, dom!chan, oral (f and m receiving), handjobs, cumshots, squirting, nipple play, fingering, unprotected sex (p in v), little bit of ass play, dirty talk, lots of pet names (lmk if i missed something)
a/n: chan is called chris in this fic, established relationship, this turned out a little more fluffier than i thought it would be ehehe, hope y'all enjoy this one too🤭🩷
~check out my: Masterlist
Dating Felix was one of the best things you've ever decided to do and you knew that, even if it's barely been half a year since he first asked you to be his girlfriend.
You were always a little shy when it came to relationships but Felix was even more shy than you and it took him a long time just to ask you out on a date or to hold your hand.
You found it endearing really, it made him seem more sweet and genuine, like he wasn't coming onto you too strongly and you liked that.
But in certain situations you wished he was a little more assertive even if you didn't mind taking the lead, you had a bit more experience than he did and you wanted to take your physical relationship to the next level, share that intimate moment with him.
But Felix would always back out before anything too risky happened, and you worried he didn't find you attractive so you decided to confront him about it.
He got so embarassed when you pointed it out, his cheeks blushing instantly as he avoided your eyes and played with his fingers.
He reassured you that it's not your fault, and confessed that you were actually his first girlfriend, that he never even kissed anyone before. You were shocked, thinking that there's no way that someone as beautiful and sweet as him was single until now.
Felix never told you that before, thinking you weren't gonna date him if you thought he was clueless and inexperienced, he felt so bad for withholding the truth from you that you could see his eyes become watery.
You were quick to comfort him, telling him that you understand and that it's okay, you don't mind him being a virgin, you actually found it kind of adorable. You weren't that much more experienced than him anyways, you only ever went to second base with a guy you dated briefly before Felix and he seemed relieved to hear that, you were going to get into it for the first time together and that made it even more special.
After that talk, you were sure your boyfriend was going to relax and maybe try not to always be so respectful with his hands and lips.
But, the next time you initiated a makeout session, as soon as your hand slid up his thigh, he jerked away from you, apologizing profusely after doing so.
"Felix, what's wrong?"- you asked, frustration building up inside you but he looked so panicked that you tried to be as gentle as you could with him.
"I'm- I'm sorry love, it's just- I don't know what to do and I'm scared that I'll do something wrong or that it won't feel good to you. I know it seems like I don't want it, but I really do. I really want you. I just don't want to disappoint you."- he rambles, fidgeting with his hands.
"Lixie, you could never disappoint me. I don't know what I'm doing either but we can learn together."- you try to reassure him, placing your hand on his.
"I wish we had some help."- he says and you chuckle as his ears become red. "I- I didn't mean it like that. Maybe we could- um... watch some porn together?"- he asks quietly and you giggle, wrapping your arms around his shoulders.
"You're really cute, you know that?"- you ask, kissing his nose and he laughs. "We can try that."
And you tried it but Felix got even more embarassed when you found a video to watch, covering his growing erection with a pillow and avoiding your gaze.
The arousal you felt was once again replaced by the frustration, the only reason you were so patient with him is because you really cared for him and didn't want to do anything that would make him feel uncomfortable or unsafe with you.
But then, a little light bulb turned on above your head as you accidentally came across a threesome video, and the knowledge of Felix being the type of person to learn things best when they're hands on, you decided to ask him what if you actually had someone there to help you?
And Felix admitted he had the same exact thought before, but was afraid to suggest it in case you thought it was gross.
Both of you laughed at your predicament and together you brainstormed on how to approach this and who to ask for help.
Your best option was Chris, your mutual friend who both of you always went to for advice and comfort. You trusted him completely and you knew he had experience and could help you out without judging you.
He was surprised at your proposition but he wasn't opposed to it, Chris just needed some time to process what you were suggesting to him.
And when he accepted, the three of you sat down and discussed your boundaries, and came to the conclusion that it's best to start out with something vanilla. You were both kinda excited to see how this would go, but neither of you knew just how much you would get.
-
That Saturday evening, the three of you sit in your room and even though you tried to make the atmosphere as chill as you could with scented candles and dim lights, Felix was still vibrating with nervousness.
You were nervous too, more so excited and Chris chuckled at the both of you, finding you so adorable in that moment.
"Why don't you start with some kissing? Maybe it'll help you relax if you start like you normally do and act like I'm not here."- Chris suggests.
"Okay, sounds good."- you nod, cupping your boyfriend's face and pressing your lips into his. You can feel Felix slightly relax against you and kissing you back gently, one of his arms curling around your waist timidly.
Chris watches the innocent kiss shared between you and something stirs inside him, his eyes narrowing and tongue darting out to wet his lips.
You're just kissing slowly with your lips, no tongue yet and both of you are already getting hot and bothered. Chris observes the way you keep pressing your lips harder into your boyfriend's while he squirms, his hand grabbing at your shirt.
You run your tongue on Felix's bottom lip and he parts his lips, letting you in. The wet sounds of your tongues dancing together make Chris grow in his pants.
He doesn't want to just watch anymore, he wants to taste the both of you. You part for air and notice that Chris is now sitting closer to you, your heart skips a beat in anticipation.
His big hand rests on your cheek, and you can hear Felix breathing hard next to you. Your big eyes stare up at Chris as he leans in and captures your lips in his.
He's different than Felix, more dominant and sure of himself and you melt into him, letting him take control. The different dynamic makes arousal drip on your panties as your hands come up to grab at Chris's biceps.
Chris bites on your lip a little and you gasp, opening your mouth for him to push his tongue in. The way he swirls it around yours has you dizzy and you hold onto him, pressing your thighs together and moaning into his mouth.
Felix should be jelaous that another man is making you feel like that when he never did, but all he feels is arousal as his cock strains and twitches in his pants. He wants to touch himself so badly, but he's still embarassed and doesn't want to seem too eager.
When the two of you part, Chris turns to Felix who looks up at him with glassy innocent eyes and Chris smirks.
"You want some too?"- he asks and Felix nods fervently making you giggle at his cuteness.
Your boyfriend's face is flushed, the redness spreading to his neck as Chris cradles his head and starts kissing him. You notice the way Felix jolts and kisses back sloppily as Chris presses his lips into his roughly. Felix whimpers and Chris pushes his tongue in, tasting your boyfriend and making his eyes roll back.
The way Chris is leaning over your boyfriend, his head thrown back as he grabs at your friend's shirt make you feel extremely hot and your hand wanders between your legs as you gently press on your clit.
Your fingers move in circles as your eyes get hazy looking at the sight before you. Chris leans away from Felix who looks absolutely disheveled, his hair messy, eyelids droopy and a dribble of drool sliding from the corner of his lips.
"Baby, are you feeling neglected?"- Chris chuckles, beckoning you to come closer and you crawl closer to them, joining them in a kiss.
It's a mess of tongue, teeth and moans as the three of you kiss and touch each other.
"So, you never went any further than this?"- Chris asks.
"Well, after neck kisses is usually when we stop."- you say, and Felix looks down at his lap, feeling embarassed. You gently place your hand on his and squeeze and he looks up at you, giving you a sweet smile.
"Okay, show me."- Chris smirks and you lean in closer to Felix. He throws his head back as soon as your lips touch him, eyes shut tight as you leave wet kisses on his soft skin. Chris decides to join in and he kneels behind Felix, moving his hair out of the way as he starts kissing the back of his neck.
"Ah!"- Felix whimpers, his hands instantly grabbing at yours, it's too much stimulation for him already. Both of you are giving him all the attention right now as you place his hands on your waist, crawling even closer to him where you're almost sitting in his lap. Your hands are roaming on his chest and abs, and Chris places his hands on Felix's hips, pressing himself closer to your boyfriend, his teeth nipping at his sensitive skin.
Felix mewls between you, his head resting on Chris's shoulder as you sink your teeth in and start sucking on his skin, your hand sliding under his shirt, fingertips brushing at him.
"Mm- too much..."- Felix whines as Chris licks a stripe on his neck, then leaves little bites, his big hands gripping at Felix's thighs.
You lean back and look at your boyfriend and Chris smirks behind him.
"Why don't we give your beautiful girlfriend the same treatment?"- Chris asks lowly and you shiver, biting on your lip. Felix nods in a daze and you get comfortable as he leans in. His lips are gentle on your skin and he leaves sweet little kisses as Chris joins him, kissing the other side of your neck a bit more strongly.
The difference between their kisses and the stimulation you're receiving make you hot again and Chris notices you squirming around. His hand gently comes up to cup your breast, before he leans back and looks at Felix. Your boyfriend nips at your skin, like he's afraid to bite into it harder but you don't mind in this moment, you're already so turned on that even the smallest touch makes you crumble.
"Have you ever touched her breasts?"- Chris asks Felix and you feel your face burning as he gently squeezes you.
"N-no."- Felix whimpers, looking at Chris's hand.
"Do you want to?"- he smirks.
"Yes, yes, I want to!"- Felix nods fast and Chris takes his hand, placing it on your breast. You moan a little as Felix gasps and squeezes you.
"You can do it like this."- Chris says as he grabs your other boob, massaging it and running his thumb on your nipple that's now becoming perky and visible under your shirt since you didn't wear a bra.
Felix looks at Chris's hand like he's mesmerized and he repeats everything exactly as Chris is showing him.
You moan, arching into their touch, becoming desperate for more friction and more action.
"Do you play with your boobs when you touch yourself, y/n?"- Chris asks, leaving little kisses on your jaw.
"Y-yes."- you whimper.
"Show us."- Chris leans back, and Felix follows him.
You oblige, taking your shirt off and tossing it aside. Felix practically drools at the sight of your breasts and you don't waste any time as you start playing with your nipples, running your fingers on them and pinching them.
Chris can see how desperate Felix is to touch them, his eyes bulging out of his skull as he traces every movement you make with your fingers.
You moan quietly, eyes closed as you get into it.
"P-please..."- Felix says suddenly and you open your eyes.
"What do you want, baby?"- you ask.
"Your- your- i wanna touch-" - Felix mutters, clearly still embarassed.
Chris chuckles on the side, his hand coming up to touch Felix's cheek.
"Tell her what you want, Lix. Use your words."- Chris commands him and your boyfriend whimpers.
"Your titties- I want them in my mouth."- Felix whines, his eyes glassy and you smirk, arching towards him.
"Come here, baby."- you say and Chris presses the back of his head, gently pushing him towards your breast. Felix eagerly wraps his lips around your nipple and starts sucking.
"Mm."- you moan, staring at him as he looks up at you sweetly. Chris is getting incredibly hard in his pants and he accidentally grips Felix's hair.
Felix moans around you, sucking more harshly as his cock twitches in his pants.
"You like this, Lix?"- Chris asks curiously, pulling on your boyfriend's hair again.
He whimpers around you again, hands now gripping at your thighs as he trembles.
"I-I didn't know you liked it rough, Lixie."- you smirk at your boyfriend.
Felix closes his eyes, the attention is on him again and Chris can sense that he's getting embarassed again so he turns back to you, his hand on your other breast as he starts playing with it.
"You can use your tongue Lix, like this."- Chris leans in and starts flicking your nipple with his tongue. You mewl, gripping at the blanket under you and Felix follows suit, flicking his tongue just like Chris.
You almost fall apart at the double stimulation, more arousal gushing on your panties and you just want to be fucked, even if it's just fingers, you need someone to touch your dripping cunt.
You reach your hand towards Felix, tugging at his shirt and he leans back.
"Take it off."- you say and Felix becomes more red as he slowly takes off his shirt.
You've seen him shirtless already but in this moment of arousal it's like you're seeing him for the first time ever and the sight makes you drool.
"What about you?"- you ask Chris and he smirks.
"How about we all strip completely? I can see you're both so desperate to be touched."- he says and you nod, getting to it immediately.
"I- Can I stay in my boxers just for a little while more?"- Felix asks timidly.
"Sure."- you say and the three of you strip, Felix still in his boxers and his eyes are glued to your glistening cunt.
On the other hand, you gasp as Chris takes off his underwear, his cock springing out for the two of you to see.
"Oh... it's so big."- Felix gulps, almost mesmerized and Chris chuckles deeply.
"Yeah? Like what you see?"- he asks your boyfriend and you giggle, your hand on Felix's thigh, gently grabbing it and massaging it.
"I mean- yeah..."- Felix nods, looking at his lap again.
"Are you still feeling shy, baby?"- you ask.
"I'm sorry, it's just... I'm not as big as Chris."- he says quietly.
"That really doesn't matter, darling."- you say sincerely, your hands lifting up to cradle his face, making him look at you.
"Yeah, don't worry about it, Lix. This is a safe space, okay?"- Chris says and your boyfriend nods before taking a deep breath in as he hooks his fingers in his boxers.
He slides them down and his cock springs out, the tip pink and glistening with precum, it's smaller than Chris's but chubby and you instantly find yourself yearning to touch him.
"So pretty."- you say and Felix chuckles quietly.
"You think my dick is pretty?"- he asks.
"Very."- you nod and he laughs again, his cheeks becoming profusely red.
"I agree."- Chris comes closer to Felix, his hand resting on his thigh as he squeezes it and slowly slides it up. You can see his cock twitch the closer Chris gets to it.
"Is it okay if I touch you?"- he asks and Felix looks at you.
"If it's okay, I'd like y/n to touch me first."- Felix says timidly and Chris nods understandingly.
"Ofcourse, I'm just here to help out."- he smiles sweetly and you gulp, your hand lifting up as you scoot closer to your boyfriend.
You've never touched a dick before but you weren't scared, you were just nervous, wanting to make your boyfriend feel good. Your fingers wrap around him and Felix falls apart immediately.
Chris kneels behind him, his hands around Felix, fingertips brushing his skin as he tries to help him relax.
You slowly start moving your hand, only ever seeing how to do it in porn videos and you have no idea if you're doing it right but your boyfriend seems to be enjoying. He's arching into your touch, his head resting on Chris's shoulder again, eyes shut tight as sweet moans leave his lips.
Chris's hands come up to his nipples and he starts pinching them which makes Felix moan louder, his hips fucking his cock into your hand.
You're in awe at seeing your boyfriend a mumbling mess like this and his cock looks inviting to you, you want to taste him but you don't want to rush too much in case Felix gets embarassed again.
Chris notices the way you stare at Felix's cock hungrily and he smirks, his hands sliding down and grabbing a handful of Felix's ass.
"Oh my-"- your boyfriend whimpers, hips jerking forwards.
You're beyond turned on and you lean down.
"I wanna taste you, Lixie."- you say.
"Mm, yes please... Please..."- Felix whines and gasps as he looks down at you, desperation evident in his voice.
You lean in close, your tongue darting out experimentally to lick at his tip, licking off the salty precum. You would be embarassed to admit this but you researched how to give good head because you wanted to give your boyfriend the best blowjob you could.
You wrap your lips around him and start sucking as Felix mewls and grabs at your shoulders.
"Wow, babygirl knows what she's doing."- Chris smirks behind Felix and you smirk back at him with your mouth full of your boyfriends cock.
Chris finds you so pretty like that as you keep taking more of Felix's cock in your mouth and he needs some friction, so he presses his dick on your boyfriend's asscheek, one of his hands tangling in his hair and pulling his head back.
"Fuck-" - Felix jolts, accidentally pushing his hips into your face a little and making you gag from the sudden movement.
"Oh my god, I'm sorry love!"- he apologizes instantly.
"Lixie, it's okay, I don't mind."- you slide off of him to reassure him that he did nothing wrong.
"Relax, baby."- Chris whispers into Felix's ear, gripping his hair and kissing his neck as you take him in your mouth again.
Felix keeps whimpering and mumbling both of your names, falling apart between the two of you. Chris gently ruts against your boyfriend as you almost swallow him whole, quickly adjusting your mouth to his length and girth. You speed up, wetting his cock with your spit as Chris sucks a love bite into his skin.
"So much..."- Felix whines.
"Is it too much babyboy?"- Chris asks.
"Mhm."- Felix mutters.
"You love being sandwiched like this, don't you?"
"Yes, yes I do!"- Felix whines as Chris's hand curls around him to play with his balls. He jolts again and you take it sucking on him harder and Felix looks down at you and almost busts right then and there.
The sight of his sweet, beautiful girlfriend in a position like that with mouth full of his cock drives him insane.
"P-please... I'm close, I can't hold it in."- Felix whimpers, his hand gentle on your head as he tries to make you stop.
You moan around him as you keep going, your hands gripping at his thighs and Chris starts pinching Felix's nipples fast and hard and Felix can't hold himself together anymore. His moans get louder and louder, his hips timidly fucking into you, afraid that if he goes faster he might hurt you.
"Let go, baby."- Chris coos at him as he keeps playing with him and Felix shakes as his cock twitches, his cum shooting into your mouth and you swallow everything he gives you, savoring his taste and milking him dry as he whimpers, eyes teary and face red.
"Good boy."- Chris smirks and Felix shivers as you finally release him and sit back, licking your lips.
"Both of you did so well. How about you return the favor, Lix?"- Chris asks and you bite your lip.
"I want to!"- Felix nods eagerly.
"Lay down, sweetheart."- Chris coos at you, seeing how turned on you are from everything, aching to be touched, your eyes glassy and desperate.
You oblige, your legs falling open immediately and Felix moans just at the sight of your sweet cunt.
"Mm, please, wanna taste."- he whines as he leans in closer. "But I don't know what to do."- he adds, embarassed again.
"Do what feels natural to you. Kiss, lick, suck. I'll be here to guide you if you need it."- Chris tells him. "And y/n will tell you what she likes, right?"- he looks at you and you nod, anticipation making goosebumps rise on your skin.
Felix leans in, he's not that clueless, he knows what a clit is and how good it feels to touch, well at least from what he saw in porn so he tries, his tongue giving you little kitten licks.
Your legs jolt as he presses it into your clit and watches your reaction.
Chris lays on his side next to you, his hand running on your inner thigh as he leans in and kisses your collarbone and breast.
Felix is getting drunk on the taste of you, how you're getting more wet just from his tongue playing with your clit and he gently pulls open your folds before he pushes his tongue in, his eyes rolling back at the feeling. He loved you on your knees and sucking him in but he knows he loves this even more. Being between your legs, his tongue buried inside you as you look down at him, your body shivering, pretty moans coming out of your lips.
Chris's hand is on your breast, kneading and playing with your nipple, his other hand in Felix's hair as he pushes his head into you.
Felix moans into your cunt as Chris holds him down and your legs shake as Felix fucks you desperately with his tongue, lapping at you like your pussy is the tastiest treat he ever had.
You moan loudly, losing yourself in the pleasure, already close to the edge as your hands grip at the blanket below you.
Felix ruts his semi hard cock on the sheets below almost unconsciously and Chris thinks he looks so cute when he's desperate like that.
Chris leans in and starts sucking on your breast, his hand playing with the other one, his focus now on you, wanting to help bring you closer to your sweet release.
You're shaking under them, the stimulation is so much stronger than when you played with yourself and you can't take anymore, fireworks exploding inside you before you cum, your sweet juices covering Felix's tongue and lips.
He whines and laps at you, savoring your taste as his eyes close.
"Did so well, baby."- Chris praises you and leans in to kiss you as your boyfriend still makes out with your wet pussy. You're sensitive and your legs close around Felix's head making him groan into you.
"T-too much."- you whimper and Felix leans back, the look on his face completely fucked out as he stares at you. You know you probably look the same, your legs still slightly shivering from your orgasm.
Both you and Chris can see that Felix is fully hard again, but you turn to Chris, your hand finding his.
"Can we do something for you before we go further?"- you ask and Felix nods.
"Yeah, we wanna make you feel good too."- he licks his lips.
"Don't worry about me. This is about the two of you."- Chris waves his hand but you can see that he's painfully hard.
You sit up and push him down so his back leans on the headboard of the bed.
"Let us make you feel good."- you say, hands on his thighs as you lean down and start kissing his cock.
Chris grunts lowly at your cute innocent face as you wrap your lips around the head. Felix comes up next to you and Chris spreads his legs more to give you both more space. Felix gathers your hair in a makeshift ponytail, helping you as you slowly take more of Chris in your mouth, his cock too big for you but you're determined to try your best.
It's the least you can do when he indulged the two of you and accepted to help you in an intimate situation like this. You bob your head up and down, your hand working the rest of his cock and Felix watches closely as he holds your hair, drooling at the thought of tasting Chris's cock after you've sucked on it.
"Please, let me."- he begs and Chris chuckles at his eagerness as you pop off of him.
Felix wastes no time, engulfing him as much as he could, making himself gag immediately.
"Slow down, baby."- you chuckle and Felix whines around Chris, the vibrations making him shiver.
Tears gather in his eyes as Felix sucks on Chris fast, taking more and more in, his spit mixed with yours making everything slippery.
You don't think you've ever seen anything as hot as your pretty innocent boyfriend doing such dirty things, his eyes rolling back every time Chris's cock hits the back of his throat.
"Fuck- I won't last long!"- Chris moans, his thighs flexing under Felix's hands.
You're the one holding your boyfriend's hair now and a wicked thought runs through your mind as Chris's hips jerk up. You grip Felix's hair and push him down more making him gag and squirm as Chris explodes with a loud moan, shooting his cum into your boyfriend's mouth.
Felix gags but swallows as he has no choice but to do that, you're still holding him down and you notice how he ruts into the bed, obviously turned on by your ministrations.
You let him lift off only when he's done milking Chris's cock and then you grab his face making him gasp as you crash your lips into his.
Chris breathes hard, watching the two of you make out messily, the taste of him pouring into your mouth from Felix's lips.
"Lixie, I want you."- you mumble against his lips, your hand wrapping around his cock.
"Mm, I want you too love."- he moans.
He looks at Chris who's coming to his senses and Chris chuckles.
"W-will you help me out a little?"- your boyfriend asks timidly and you giggle as Chris nods and sits up.
You lay down against the pillows, your hands on the back of your thighs as you lift up and open your legs so your cunt is on full display.
Felix groans watching it clench around nothing.
"She feels empty, don't you baby?"- Chris asks and you nod fervently. His finger is on your clit as he slowly circles it and you moan pushing up into him.
"You have to prep her first."- he tells Felix and he nods, his fingertips on your folds as Chris keeps massaging your clit.
"P-please..."- you whine and Felix sinks two of his fingers slowly inside you, careful to be gentle as he grabs your breast and massages it.
Your eyes roll in the back of your head as the two men play with your pussy, Felix pushing in as deep as he can and moving slowly as Chris helps guide his wrist while he plays with your clit, flicking it and pinching it.
You're moaning loudly, letting go of everything as your slick drips down onto their hands and the sheets beneath you, making a mess. You've never been this wet or turned on and you start moving your hips up into their touch and Felix speeds up, fucking your pussy open for his cock.
"Oh my god, ah!"- you practically scream as you explode, squirting on their hands as Felix pulls his fingers out and gasps.
"Oh..."- you chuckle embarassingly at the sight, trying to catch your breath.
"That was so hot."- Felix whines, licking off his fingers. Before you or Chris can react he grabs Chris's wrist and puts his lips around two of his fingers, sucking on them and looking at Chris hazily.
"Lix loves his mouth stuffed, hm?"- Chris smirks as you lift up on your elbows and look at them.
Felix moans around his fingers before he pops off, tongue darting out to lick at his lips.
He turns to you and Chris kneels behind him as you grab your boyfriend's hands and bring him closer to you.
"Fuck me, Lixie, please! I can't wait anymore!"- you whimper.
Felix groans as Chris gently pushes him closer to you. He reaches around your boyfriend's body and gently grabs his cock. Felix mewls as he melts between both of you and Chris pushes him down, massaging your wet pussy with Felix's cock.
"Mm feels so good..."- he whines and Chris smirks, his cock is getting hard again and he can't help himself as it slides between Felix's asscheeks.
Felix gasps and almost jolts away but Chris holds him.
"It's okay, I won't do anything you don't want, Lix."- Chris reassures him and Felix nods.
"Is this okay?"- he asks as his cock slides against him.
"Mmm it's good, so good!"- Felix whines as his tip catches on your folds.
"Put it in, Lixie, give me your cock!"- you whine, impatient and craving to be stuffed full of your boyfriend's cute chubby cock.
He moans and slowly pushes in, Chris holding his hips and rutting into him slowly.
You groan at the stretch, your little cunt opening up to take him fully. Felix lets out a deep growl as he bottoms out, hands gripping at your body. Your hands end up around his shoulders and you look into his eyes.
"Move, baby."- you moan and Felix starts fucking you slowly to let you adjust, Chris following his pace and rutting into his ass.
You fall into a rhythm, the three of you rocking together, moaning and praising each other, hands grabbing everywhere.
"Feels good babygirl?"- Chris asks you and you moan in response.
"See, she's going a little dumb on your cock, Lix."- Chris smirks.
"Mm fuck..."- Felix whines. "So warm and tight."- he keeps whimpering as he pushes his cock into you as deep as he can.
Chris is close as he rubs against Felix, his hand coming around to play with your clit once again as Felix fucks into you harder. You see stars as your eyes shut tightly, head falling back.
Felix is a mumbling mess, hips jerking harshly as he drools and Chris speeds up, jerking his cock so his head is massaging Felix's hole.
"Ah, ah, ah!"- Felix moans constantly, stimulated on both ends and Chris chuckles darkly, his head pushing against his tight hole, teasing his entrance.
"You want me to stretch your tight ass while you fuck your girlfriend's sweet pussy, hm?"- Chris growls into his ear as he pulls his head back harshly.
"Mm, fuck yes, daddy!"- Felix whimpers loudly and then freezes when he realizes what he said. Your eyes snap open and Felix panicks.
"I'm sorry, I-I don't know why I said that."- his lips tremble, eyes watering.
"Hey, hey, don't cry."- Chris soothes him. "You can call me whatever you want, it's completely fine and I don't mind."
Felix looks at you and you bite on your lip, your eyes hazy as you were close to your release.
"It was hot, love. I don't mind either."- you say and Felix melts, hips moving slowly into yours again.
It doesn't take long for the three of you to get back into your rhythm and your orgasm builds up once more, as does Chris's. You cum first, exploding all over Felix's cock, clenching around him as Chris spills his seed on your boyfriend's ass and the back of his thighs. Your pussy holding onto his cock and Chris's cum painting him makes him lose his mind and he pulls out, jerking his cock and exploding all over your stomach and pulsating cunt.
The three of you have to take a few moments to calm down and clean up, Chris helping you change the sheets you made a mess off.
As you and Felix get ready to cuddle up, you notice Chris picking up his clothes.
"Where are you going?"- you ask, lifting your head up.
"Well, I helped you out. I mean, I don't want to overstay my welcome. I'm sure the two of you would like some time alone now."- he says, scratching the back of his neck shyly, his demeanor completely different than moments before.
"Stay with us."- Felix says, and Chris's eyes soften.
"Yeah, come here."- you beckon him with your finger and he chuckles, coming closer to the bed and getting comfortable behind Felix, who was curled up in you, his arm and leg wrapped around you.
You press a gentle kiss on your boyfriend's forehead as he mumbles, already half asleep.
"I love you both..."- he mutters into your neck.
You and Chris lock eyes and smile at each other.
"We love you too."
✨Taglist: @moonchild9350 @janepg @velvetmoonlght @bookobsessedfreak
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rowdyluv · 6 months ago
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“He's been a bit of a jerk”
Summary: quinn suddenly ditches his childhood best friend on new years eve when they have spent every NYE together since they were 6. luke saves the night
Warnings: use of y/n and I think one or two uses of y/n/n, only brief mentions of quinn not actually active in fic but substantial to the plot, like has internal dialogue via italics, if I missed anything please let me know
Word Count: 1.8k
requested: yes - “luke pining after Quinn’s best friends and he finally gets the girl.”
Authors Note: edited as may 31, 2024 - if you read before May 31 the word count is now 800 more than it is was previously 🫣
part 2
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On the frost-tipped grass, (Y/N) sat beneath a canopy of stars, her back propped against the rough bark of an old oak tree. A light dusting of snow had settled over the ground, transforming the world into a perfect winter wonderland. She shivered, not necessarily from the cold evening, but from the heart wrenching realization that tonight was supposed to go different. It was New Year's Eve, and every year since they were six, she and her childhood best friend, Quinn had celebrated together. But this year, he had up and ditched her last minute. Just like that. He gave her zero explanation and no apology. He had just vanished into the night with his middle brother, leaving her feeling more alone than ever. Which when he left for the NHL was pretty hard to top, yet he somehow managed to do it when he was only somewhere in the same town. The two barely get to see each other anymore as it is. He lives in Vancouver and she lives in Michigan. Quinn flies her out to a few games a season and of course she attends any Canucks vs Redwings games as well as Canucks vs Devils games. However the time the two have available with one another is so restricted at that time, she may as well be just another fan in the arena.
Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of footsteps crunching through the frosted snow. A warm blanket was draped over her shoulders, and a steaming cup of hot chocolate was pressed into her hands. She looked up, her eyes falling on her best friend’s youngest brother, Luke, as he joined her. She briefly looked over his features, his cheeks were already flushed from the growing colder night, but the smile he gave her was warm and genuine.
"Hey, (Y/N)," he whispered as if they were amongst a huge crowd of people and not alone in an empty yard. His voice still highly audible over the silence of the night. "I came out here for a few reasons but one being because I…” Luke’s words ran out into the night. His right hand pulling off his beanie then he was slipping his fingers through his messy curls. A tell tale sign he was nervous about whatever he was about to say. “I wanted to apologize for what Quinn did to you tonight. He had no right to leave you like that. I don’t know what is going on with him and what would make him decide to leave behind the one person who has been consistent for him that isn’t family. The one person in his life that still sees him as Quinn and not as big shot Quinn..” Luke shoved his beanie back on and sighed. He had been looking up at the night sky watching the night clouds move uncovering the stars. “He has been a bit of a jerk here lately, and I'm sorry I couldn't do anything to stop him."
(Y/N) smiled weakly at the rambling boy next to her. Her gaze slowly drifting back up to the now clear sky and where the stars were twinkling like Christmas lights. "It's fine, really. I mean, it stung a lot at first, but..." Her voice trailed off, and she shrugged halfheartedly. "I'm just glad you were here tonight." The butterflies in Luke’s stomach flapped back to life and were going insane at her last statement. “Who knows Lukey. Maybe we can start our own tradition together this New Year’s.” Luke was watching her body languagefor any signs of a joke before speaking up. “I wouldn’t mind. It would teach Quinn to ditch someone as special as you.” (Y/N) slightly smiled, still looking up at the stars. “Special? No. Just me Luke.” (Y/N) argued, Luke didn’t want to have the silly argument back and forth. He knew just how special she is. Given the chance he would show her too. After all, a girl like her deserves to be treated, loved, and respected the way she treats, loves, and respects everyone else. (Y/N) was the girl has sought after ever since Luke stopped thinking he was supposed to marry his mom when he was older. Luke shook his head and groaned at her words. “One day (Y/N/N). Just you wait, one day you’ll know just how special you truly are.” He tells her before they fell into another comfortable silent state. His words confidently spilled out. (Y/N) turned her head opposite from Luke so he couldn’t see the true smile she was wearing across her face because of him. She also hoped he couldn’t hear her heartbeat as a result of his words.
The silence stretched between them, as she snuggled further into the blanket, (y/n) suddenly became aware that Luke was only wearing a thin jacket as he shivered. She glanced over at him, her eyes meeting his. "Here," she said, pulling the blanket off from around her shoulders. "You can have this. It's getting kind of cold out here." Luke hesitated for a moment, debating on offering to share the blanket. "No, really. It's fine. I'm warm enough." She shot him a glare. “Luke Warren Hughes. I just saw you shiver.” Her tone, at best, was barely strict. He held eye contact waiting for her to continue, he could practically see the gears turning in her mind. “If you won’t take it for yourself, we will share it.” She says wrapping it around him and snuggling into his side. Luke was trying his best to calm the butterflies and his racing heart. While also fighting the mental battle on if he should shoot his shot at midnight.
(Y/N) is the girl I have wanted for years now. She is right here. Cuddling into my side, a couple moves and I could easily be her new year’s kiss. If she hates it? I just play it off as a friendly new year’s kiss. Her and Quinn have been each other’s midnight kiss before, I can play it off as if I’m filling his shoes if she questions me and she’s angry. I can do this. I can do this. I think I can do this?
As midnight was quickly approaching the air was thick with anticipation between the both of them and more people were gathering outside.
The countdowns echoed throughout the night, each one louder than the last.
Fireworks lit up the sky, casting a multitude of colors over everyone. The fireworks also casting iridescent colors across the blanket of snow on the ground. Making a beautiful picturesque scene.
Luke decided it was definitely now or never. He may not have done it 12am but right now under the colorful display of the many fireworks was perfect. He smiled down at (Y/N), feeling a warmth spread through his chest, for the first time the butterflies in his stomach calmed. He leaned in, his breath fanning her cheek. "Happy New Year, (Y/n)." She felt his lips brush against her ear, sending a shiver down her spine. That is when he froze up. Her reaction to his lips barely touching her sent his heart racing. He was scared she was going to send him flying into the snow. Her best friend’s baby brother’s lips just touched her. But she didn’t move. She was waiting? Luke quickly finished his well wishes to her before she snapped out of it, "I hope this year brings you everything you wish for." Her breath caught in her throat as he pulled back, their gazes locked.
“Do it Luke. Her eyes are basically screaming, begging for you to.” why do you have to be in my head now jack dear god please shut up.
In a seconds time he was leaning back in, his left hand making its way softly to the back of her head. His fingers interlacing in her hair. (Y/N)’s breaths were slow and deep awaiting Luke’s next move. “Tell me if this isn’t something you want.” Luke swallows down the anxiety he was feeling. Mentally silencing the jack he hears in his head telling him to go for it. “Because once I do this once.. I’m going to want to do this again and again. Everyday for the next foreseeable future.” Luke’s voice was trembling in want, desire, need. All of his feelings rushing to the forefront of his mind. “Shut up and kiss me Luke.” (Y/N) sighed grasping his face pulling him to her.
As their lips touched, the grand finale of the fireworks show was set off. The energy of the grand finale matching the energy sparking off the two of them. Luke and (y/n)’s kiss was hot enough to melt the snow underneath them. The way their mouths moved in perfect harmony. The small nips Luke made against her bottom lip as he pulled away. It left them both wanting more, needing more.
“Remind me to thank my brother for being an ass.” Luke mumbles against her lips before getting lost in another languid kiss. “Lukey let’s go home. It’s the new year, I’m cold and I also want to thank Quinn, because now I know who the better kisser is...well I’ve not kissed Jack.” She pauses and makes a playful gagging noise. “And because it finally got you to make a move.” Luke’s face went more red than it already was where it was tinged from the cold. “That..what?” He was baffled by her admittance . “I had my assumptions. I’m just happy I wasn’t wrong. Now let’s goooo. I wanna go get in bed and get warm.” (Y/N) sent a wink his way.
She was hinting towards cuddling. But with how fast Luke was grabbing up the blankets that they had been sitting on and were wrapped up in, before grabbing her hand and heading to the car…She is pretty sure his mind went a different direction.
“Quinn now owes me $10, he said you didn’t like me.” (Y/N) says once they were in the car and headed down the road. “You two had a bet on if I had a crush on you or not?” Luke laughed while asking. “No we had a bet on if you even liked me as a person. Because you avoided me. He’s going to be so shocked to know that you like-like me.” She clarifies with a giggle when she says ‘like-like’. Luke rolls his eyes at the thought of his older brother being naive enough to believe he didn’t like his best friend. “So back to what you said earlier tonight…Same thing and same place next new year’s?” Luke asks her. She nods with a smile. “New tradition, with you. Starting this year.” (Y/N) confirms with a nod. “Only maybe we hang out inside until right before midnight.” She adds grabbing for Luke’s hand to wrap both of her freezing ones around. The two sat in a comfortable silence stealing quick glances, with smiles plastered across their faces, and glimmers in their eyes the rest of the way to the Hughes home.
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squishytenya · 8 months ago
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Hey Do you remeber your Tenya and Aizawa ask, with y/n Crying? What about some of the other casts like Katsuki or Ejiro?
if you dont mind please and thank you
They Make You Cry Headcanons
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I lowkey had to search my own blog for this but I found it! thanks for the request <3
Pairings - Bakugou x gn!reader, Kirishima x gn!reader + Kaminari x gn!reader
Warnings - arguments, cursing, crying
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Katsuki Bakugou
▹part of being in a relationship with Katsuki is dealing with his harsh personality. Even if he does calm down the older he gets, it's still probably not to the same extent of a normal human being.
▹he probably would be completely speechless the moment you started crying after an argument - straight up would not know how to respond to that.
▹his eyes would go wide and he would go to take a step towards you and then bring himself back, holding his arm to himself.
▹"hey... don't do that"
▹for all his faults Katsuki is, deep inside, a good person and he knows this is the kind of shit you lose relationships from and he really really doesn't want to lose you.
▹ but he does know he can be a bit much and he probably takes a while to come down from whatever he's feeling so he just kinda leaves for a few minutes
▹ he comes back with a cup of tea and perches gently on the bed next to you, avoiding eye contact
▹he would do his best to spit out an apology, but it's not something that would come naturally to him. Seeing your face crumple like it did is still replaying in his mind and he knows he has to fix this somehow - so he does his best to explain himself
▹eventually he would just stop rambling and take your hand in his, squeezing it gently.
▹"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that to you"
▹ he'd just sit by you, hand in his until you were ready to talk to him and talk over what had led to the argument in the first place and he really does take your words to heart about what upset you
▹he'd try to cut down on raising his voice and try to cut out teasing nicknames entirely, unless he knew you were okay with them already
▹a sweet guy really
Eijirou Kirishima
▹I cannot see Kiri upsetting you on purpose, even during an argument he isn't the type to yell or get super angry with you
▹him making you cry is most likely a complete accident on his part, or even him accidentally playing into an insecurity you have without properly thinking about it
▹when your relationship first started out, I think he probably didn't understand you might not be comfortable with the things he's comfortable with, especially during social situations
▹ also probably doesn't understand others might read his kindness as flirting, so when you two are invited to a hero party to socialise and he pretty much ignored you the whole night, he had no idea why you began tearing up on the way home
▹obviously, he's worried about why you're crying and what he did! and how he can fix it is at the forefront of his mind almost immediately after noticing
▹and when you explain it to him, he pretty much crumbles straight away - he is in disbelief that he made you feel that way
▹he falls over himself explaining that he didn't mean to make you feel that way, he was just overwhelmed by the pressure of hero society and got caught up
▹Kiri is very good at admitting when he is wrong, and puts a lot of effort into having healthy communication in his relationships - platonic or otherwise
▹pulls over the car literally just so he can hold both of your hands in his and make eye contact as he explains his actions, specifically so you understand he's being genuine
▹"I'd never do that to you on purpose, you're the most important person to me"
▹after your sniffles have subsided, he pulls you into a hug and promises never to do something like that again - and you bet he keeps his promise!!!
▹takes you to get food too, just as an extra apology and you sit in the car park eating ice cream together - he makes sure you're the center of his attention the entire time <3
Denki Kaminari
▹oh he's so stupid. he's so lovely, but so, so stupid.
▹honestly he probably says something insanely embarrassing in front of your friends and pays no attention to how that might make you feel, especially if you're close to these people
▹doesn't even notice when the room goes completely silent and nobody is talking but him, it takes one of his friends clearing their throat for him to notice your eyes filling with tears
▹in his defense, he does try to explain himself straight away and takes you into another room to have the conversation (at the very least) but it takes a little bit more explaining to him why his actions would upset you
▹doesn't really get it at first but you explaining, and your face as you cry, makes his heart hurt and he tries to rectify his actions as soon as he can
▹the first thing he thinks to do in that moment is bundle you up in his arms and rock the both of you back and forth to calm you down, which works a little more than you'd like to admit
▹runs his hands over your back, up and down, until your breathing evens out - does not give a shit about anyone outside of you two in that moment
▹once you've stopped crying, full on apology - hands and knees!
▹he seems genuinely heartbroken to have embarrassed you and takes full responsibility for what he did
▹ kicks everyone else out of the house and spends the rest of the evening making it up to you and reminding you of how important you are to him and just how sorry he is
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I hope these were good! I haven't written in ages so this'll be the first comeback headcanons, hope you guys enjoyed it <3
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neoarchipelago · 7 months ago
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Haven't properly written in a while... This writer's block is destroying me...
_-_-_-_
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Simon Riley getting hurt on his bike.
Like he has a mild crash because of a dumbass doing a U-turn and got smashed.
Bike is ruined, arm is bleeding from rubbing the asphalt. He just gets up, groaning because, shit, that bike is too weeks old. Walks like a boss but the old lady has already called 911 and is crying apologizing. Simon feels suddenly bad for his internal 'dumbass' comment. Paramedics tend to his wound, the old cop scolding him for driving in leather pants but in t-shirt.
"What kind of two half ass protection is this son?"
"What?"
Simon just feels a migraine rushing to him.
He gets a ride home from Soap who he called. Best buddy wouldn't shut up either but he loves his Johnny like his own brother so he lets him ramble.
He walks up to the elevator, saying bye to an over worried Soap who just groans and curses in his own babbling.
The elevator's doors close and silence finally settles. He runs his temple with his left hand through the balaclava, the right one holding his leather gloves and being bandaged.
His right arm stings, but he had much worse. Nothing a bit of bourbon couldn't erase. The pounding of his head needs to shut up too. The doors ding and he groans.
He walks to his apartment's door, fumbling the keys and the sound of a door slowly opening is heard behind him.
He glances back, pretty soft eyes looking in his direction. Ah yes. The neighboor.
"Hello Mr ril-... Oh god... What happened?"
He almost wants to chuckle at the worried expression.
" 'ust a scratch..." He mumbles, the words rumbling with his low tone.
But the footsteps he hears makes him sigh and he turns around looking down at the pretty Princess in front of him.
"Mr Riley! That doesn't look like a scratch... What happened?"
The pleading eyes, the worried expression does it for him, his eyes never leaving yours as he automatically mumbles:
"I crashed the bike."
Your eyes widen in shock again. He feels bad. You look even more worried now. He didn't even know that was possible and it somehow breaks his heart.
"Oh sh-...hum"
Hmm... She curses? He never heard her curse. It's adorable.
"Please tell me you're ok... Are you hurt anywhere else? Why didn't you call me? I mean-"
God that blush is cute. How can you be so cute? He wants to just put you under a glass case and keep you in there. He'd get lots of flowers and moss. You'd be his fairy-
"Mr Riley?"
She tilts her head to the side.
"I'm fine. No broken bones."
That seems enough to make her sigh of relief. But suddenly she grabs his good hand and she tugs softly towards her still open door.
"What?"
Simon is floored that this is the only thing he manages to say.
"You can't stay on your own! You just got into a crash! You need to be looked after!"
"What?"
He wants to punch himself now. Don't you know any other words Simon Riley?!
Also, why is he walking behind her like a lost puppy she's softly tugging on the leash of?
Why is he inside her apartment? With the door closed?
How did he end up sitting on the couch? With a cup of tea and cookies.
"What?" He asks again.
She giggles.
"What do you want for dinner? I'll let you decide what you want I'll go prepare the guest's bedroom!" You happily jump to your task after he nods.
Simon looks around, the warmth and cozy space, the plants and the weird cat staring at him from the window sit. He kinda looks at Simon the same way Simon is looking at him. With the same expression that says:
"What?"
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lazyneonrabbitt · 1 year ago
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Sinful
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Daryl Dixon x Reader | SMUT
Many years of pretending to be a nun builds up quite the frustration.
~~☆☆☆~~
You didn't speak one word French and you despised religion.
You were on a sightseeing trip with friends when the world went to shit and by pure accident you ran into the one place that had you lying your ass off to be able to survive.
Wait no, you did know a few French words.
"Je ne parlez pas Francais. Englais?" You held your hands up in apology as you excused yourself for not speaking their language. With few words and lots of gestures you were let in and brought to the person who spoke the most English where you continued your lies. Some fake tears and religious hand gestures as you cried in your native language none of them spoke, only to add some more apologies at the end. You were let in as long as you followed their beliefs and eventually made yourself into a part of their supply run group.
Just as you were then brought to the one who could communicate with you best, you were now called to the central area to meet with a man who spoke only English.
An American, he said. An absolutely gorgeous one, you thought.
Even though he looked a mess he was very handsome and you couldn't help but think up a plan to get him alone with you.
You discussed today's plans for the man with your sisters and sent them on their way.
You took the man to an unused room so he could get cleaned up while your sisters washed his clothes and prepared food for him.
"How come yer english is so good?" You didn't expect that to be his first question. "We were taught English in school before the world went to shit. Top of my class too." You happily explained as you ran him a bath.
"Put your clothes in here," you motioned to the basket next to the filled tub. "I'll go take them to get cleaned and bring you a change of clothes and some towels."
He did as you asked and called you over once he was all the way in the water. Once you returned he had cleaned himself up and was enjoying the fact he could relax again for once. You announced your presence by knocking on the door before going in and closing it again behind you. "I got you some clothes. Nothing too fancy but it'll do."
He followed your form around the room, quickly catching how hard you were trying not to stare at him. "If yer uncomfortable ya can wait outside. Call ya back when I'm dressed." His comment caught you off guard and had you turn to face him before even coming up with a reply. "Oh, no. Not uncomfortable at all.." you stammered, sighing and sitting down you started the tale of how you ended up here. "Just as unlucky as I was huh." He smiled at your confession. "Hand me a towel?" You did as he asked and he took the towel to his hips and stepped out of the tub. You were still eyeing everything except for him with a clearly frustrated aura surrounding you.
"What's on yer mind, girly? I know ya aint' lookin' away cuz of god." He knew why, he just wanted you to admit it.
He stepped closer to you, entertaining some stupid tale that surfaced in his mind, narrated by his brother who bragged about the best sex he's ever had with some chick in a nun costume during Halloween.
"You're.. just very handsome." You talked fast in the hope he'd drop it but he clearly wasn't going to. "I aint' exactly yer age.." Even with your loose layers on your squirming was caught easily and you knew he knew. "You're a really good looking man and I don't care that you're probably as old as my dad would be now or if you end up being dangerous I just really want you to fuck me until I see god for real this time, okay?" A frustrated huff ended your ramble before you felt his breath fanning your cheek as he spoke. "Fine by me. So where d'ya wan' it?" He stood behind you with one hand on your hip and the other pointing out different locations in the room. "How 'bout I bend ya over tha' desk, huh? Tha' bed is lookin' mighty fine, an' 'msure tha' rug won't hurt yer knees." His hand came back to rest on your hip.
"Y-- Yes." You were suddenly very aware of his figure pressed against your back and his hands pulling up the layers of your habit. "Yes, what?" His lips were on your neck right after removing the obstructing fabrics. You only nodded in response, which was taken as a yes to all options he suggested and pressed you to walk with him towards the desk before pressing your chest against the wooden surface and running his hands over your panty covered ass. A hand ran up your spine to unclasp your bra while the other pulled your panties down before pressing his hard member against you.
You let out a soft whine and pressed back against him, almost begging him to get going already.
"Impatient, are we? What would yer friends think if they saw ya here with me?" He rubbed his length between your folds, covering himself in your slick and line himself up at your entrance.
"Please.." you pushed back against him hoping he'd just start but the roll of your hips wasn't enough to push him past your entrance. "Wha' was tha'? Wanna confess yer sins to father Dixon?"
"Pleease fuck me--ohgod.." your breath caught in your throat and your hands clamped around the edge of the old wooden desk as he pushed his full length in without a warning. Your face pressed into the your arm to not scream at the stretch. He gave you no time to adjust and set a steady pace. One hand reaching down between your legs to rub at your clit, an apology for not prepping you before while the other kept your hips in place.
You hadn't felt this deliciously full in years and the way his tip hit that spongey spot inside you with every thrust combined with the stimulation of your clit has you close to seeing stars in record time.
You pushed your hips back with each thrust, begging to cum. "Fuck-- so close.." Your words came out as breathy whimpers that spurred Daryl on even more and had you cumming over his cock in a matter of moments. His thrusts slowed before stopping entirely to give both of you a second to catch your breath and move over to the next piece of furniture.
You were easily picked up and manhandled onto the bed, where you were thrown onto your back before he crawled over you and caught your lips in his.
"Fuck, yer so gorgeous." He mused as he kissed down your neck, leaving red marks all over your chest and sucked on your tits. His trail of bites and licks kept moving south until he reached right down your bellybutton. Wrapping his strong arms around your thighs he spread you wide open and licked a thick stripe right over your folds, pulling a loud, muffled moan from you. "Gotta keep quiet, lil' lady. Dun' want yer friends ta hear ya.." He smirked up at you before delving right in, tongue deep inside of you with his nose pressed against your clit. He lapped up every single drop that threatened to spill, like he hadn't been fed in ages. "Taste so good." He loved how you tried to squirm out of his grasp as you quickly approached another orgasm. The rumble of his laugh sending you even closer as he sucked at your clit and send you over the edge again.
Daryl wiped his face with his hand before moving up and wrapped your legs around his waist. "Ya still good?" He caressed your cheek with the back of his fingers.
You nodded with a soft, breathy laugh and wiggled your hips against him. He nodded back at you and lined himself up with you again, pressing in slowly and admiring every reaction your body gave underneath him. His pace was much softer than at the desk and it gave you a moment to really look at the man above you as well. It gave you a chance to really grab and scratch at every inch of skin within reach as your heels pulled him in deeper and helped him set a pace you really enjoyed. The soft sighs that left you with every thrust, right at his ear and the soft fingers in his hair together with the light scratches right at his tailbone had him groaning out in pleasure. "Hah.. keep doin' tha'.." He grunted into the crook of your neck.
You dug your nails harder into his skin and tugged at the messy strands at the back of his neck, moaning just a little louder and bucking your hips to meet his thrusts.
You could feel his thrusts getting more erratic and his fingers moving between you to to pull you over the edge with him. With only a few more thrusts and rubs you both finished, riding out your highs.
"That was.. wow." A shaky laugh left you as you rolled over to look at him. "Ya think I'm done with ya already?" His cocky attitude worked like magic and had you intrigued at what he still had in store for you.
"Haven't fucked ya on tha' old carpet yet." He nodded at the floor at the end of the bed. "Wantya ta ride me." His request was clear, and you were in no mood to decline.
You stretched and got up, moving over to the end of the bed. You felt both your release running down your thighs, running your finger over the inside of the soft legs you scooped up some of it and sucked your fingers clean as you kept your eyes on him.
Daryl let out a deep growl as he got up to grab you and pull you down to the floor.
Your face was harshly pressed into the soft rug. With your hips still up Daryl had the perfect angle to ravage you.
"Ya like teasin' huh." His grumbling was your new favorite sound.
He rubbed his cock between your thighs, smearing your cum all over you both. One hand held you hips up as the other drew soft circles over your asscheek. His touch left you before being returned with a loud smack right to the soft flesh. A whine left your throat at the harsh contact, but that didn't stop him from repeating the motion twice more. "'S whatcha get fer bein' a tease."
He went back to caressing the struck skin softly and pressing the tip of his cock between your folds and starting at a rough pace, easily fucking into your overstimulated cunt.
"Ohh ahpleaaseee slowdown-" his pace was so rough your orgasm crashed into you before you even had a chance to realize you were getting close.
With a chuckle that borderlined on sadistic Daryl pulled out and maneuvered you with your wobbly legs on top of him. He held you up right above him and pulled you down onto his cock, thrusting up a couple of times before stilling.
Only a command of "Ride." left his lips as his hands stilled on your ass, squeezing hard to spur you on. Your body was tired, you had barely any strength left after god knows how many orgasms you had by now and you had no idea if you could keep up with his desired pace.
You placed your hands flat on his chest and lifted yourself up before sinking down again with a huff a few times before whining in exhaustion. "Daryl.." you wanted to beg him to fuck you and get it over with but he wasn't having any of it. His hands on your ass grab on harshly and lift your hips for you and starts fucking himself with you. "Ya feel so good, squeezin' me like tha'.." You couldn't help it you were so overstimulated your body worked on its own. "F-- fill me so good.." you managed to breathe out between thrusts. "Wanna cum.. please.."
Daryl let go of your hip to rub at your clit to help you reach your high. Your pleased noises were like music in his ears. He loved all your tells that let him know you were close. You were squeezing him so tightly he had a hard time to hold off until you finished.
"C'mon doll. One more time.." His thumb rubbed at your sensitive nub a couple of times until your walls clamped around his cock so hard he came right there with you, spilling deep.
"Yeah, fuck seeing god." Your slumped on top of Daryl with an Oof. "I wanna see you all day every day."
Daryl's laugh rumbled against your ear and he kissed your head. "Got more sins to share with father Dixon?" He air quotes the name.
You nodded against his chest.
"Got some years of catching up to do."
~~☆☆☆~~
A/N: I know I used this prompt alreasy but I wanted to turn that quick drabble into a full fic lol.
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iced-nct · 1 year ago
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Greedy NJM
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Pairing: CFO Na Jaemin x F Reader Word Count: 4.5k Warnings: Suggestive, occasional swear, jealous Jaemin Synopsis: Jaemin knew the second you walked into his office to interview for a sales role that he needed to hire you. Incredibly well spoken and driven, you reminded him a lot of himself in some ways. Except he didn’t want you for a sales position. Oh no. He wanted you as his personal assistant. Promptly after meeting with you, he let go of his current assistant to hire you for it instead. If Jaemin is going to be stuck at his desk for ten hours a day, he’ll be damned if he doesn’t have a pretty thing to stare at just outside his door. Maybe you’ll be able to tame the infamous office playboy. 
a/n: just casually dipping in to drop a 4.5k Jaemin Apply Within fic that I have been working on for like years lmfao. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy! I promise I'm going to be more active with my fics again!!!
Jaemin’s secretary blinked slowly at him, as if to process what she had just heard. “You are… firing me? Did I do something?” 
“No, I just needed a change of scenery! And I’m not firing you, I am just relocating you to a different department” He chirped in response, his voice cheerful though his eyes were dark and expression firm.
Jaemin turned his back to her to head into his corner office, “oh. One more thing.” He turned, one palm pressed firmly against the door frame as he leaned back. “I need all your things moved by tonight. My new secretary starts tomorrow morning” He winked before slamming his door closed.
-
Today could not have been off to a worse start. First there was the hole in your favorite pair of stockings, then your coffee machine decided to have a meltdown, and finally you had missed the bus that would allow you extra time to grab coffee on the way to the office. As far as first day’s go, this was not your best. Having to settle for a pair of plain sheer black tights to wear under your skirt and ordering a taxi, knowing full well the extra money was well worth having time to grab a cup of coffee. You hurried out the door, laptop bag and purse in hand, just hoping as you hustled into the back of the cab that the day wouldn’t get any worse.
The line at the coffee shop was surprisingly not horrendous, it only took about 10 minutes before you were holding your iced coffee and making your way through the entrance to Neo Dream. Jaemin’s office was on the 20th floor, you remembered this from your interview. As you moved to get off on your floor a solid chest made contact with your cup, spilling coffee all down the front of yourself and the stark white dress shirt in front of you. 
“I am so sorry! I was in such a rush, I should have paid better attention” You rambled, hoping that this stranger wouldn’t chew you out for such an accident.
“Miss Y/n?” You looked up to see Jaemin smiling down at you. “First day jitters?” He asked, a playful tone in his voice.
Your cheeks flushed with heat, “I am very sorry Mr. Na. I will clean this up right away” 
“Don’t bother, I will call the janitorial staff to clean up. We should get started with your tour, after we get changed” He tilted his head, indicating for you to follow.
The view from Jaemin’s office was stunning to say the least, the sun was almost up now but you could imagine the sunrises and sunsets that could be viewed from these windows.
“Yes, the view is lovely isn’t it?” You turned to find Jaemin, a sliver of his chest just barely exposed to you as he buttoned up a black dress shirt. “I apologize, I seem to have run out of women’s blouses, but I do have a knit sweater that may work” he jested while handing you a gray wool sweater. 
It was clearly men’s, but this would have to make do for today. Just as you were about to slip the sweater on over your stained blouse a hand stopped you. 
“If we don’t send these off to the drycleaners, the stain will set and ruin your shirt. I can’t have that, and I don’t want you to either. Just wear the sweater and I’ll send your shirt off with mine” His smile was charming, almost knee weakening. 
“Oh okay… but is there somewhere else for me to change?” Your head tilted in question.
Jaemin’s eyes widened with realization “Yes, oh gosh I’m sorry, I will turn around. You let me know when you’re decent”
You turned your back to him and began unbuttoning the shirt. Unbeknownst to you, Jaemin could make out the reflection of your chest in the window beside him. Not much could be seen, but the way the black lace of your bra held you had him wishing you allowed him to watch. Just as Jaemin’s dress pants started to get a little too tight for his liking, you cleared your throat, snapping him back from his thoughts.
“Thank you for the sweater! What should I get started with today?” You asked, whilst handing over your stained shirt. 
“You can get started on unpacking your desk and setting yourself up. I have some afternoon meetings that I will be in today, so I doubt we will see eachother very much. Just answer the phone if it rings and book in meetings for this week” You nodded at the instructions and headed out, closing the door behind you.
You paused to lean on it, breathing slowly as the picture of that small sliver of Jaemin’s defined chest floated around in your head. In the office behind you, your boss sat down at his desk, taking all the effort in the world to not call you back in to help him deal with the situation beneath his desk right now.
-
Days had turned into weeks, and though nothing of note had happened after that first eventful morning. You had settled in wonderfully, making friends with people on the finance floor, accompanying Jaemin to the occasional meeting to take notes for him when he didn’t feel like it, and canceling meetings he had with Mark just because it was funny to watch them squabble. There was lots of extra chatter throughout the office as everyone buzzed with excitement for the first annual company gala. A newer finance colleague had asked you to the gala a few days ago, and you had gladly accepted, assuming that it was a friendly gesture from one newbie to another. Excitement filled your chest as you thought about how much fun it would be to attend this company gala. The excitement was cut short however, when the door to Jaemin’s office swung open. Your boss stood there staring daggers at you, dread rushed in as you mentally went through every file you placed on his desk today, every meeting you had booked. What could you have possibly done wrong?
“Y/n. Come in here please.” Jaemin’s voice was deadly cold as he strode back towards his desk.
You slinked in, he gestured for you to close the door. “Did I do something wrong?” You asked, hesitating to turn around to face him.
“Have a seat, we’ll talk about it” He nodded to the chair in front of his desk for you to sit.
Despite sitting, the load on your shoulders felt ten times heavier under Jaemin’s stare. He slid a small pink envelope across the desk to you, your name scrawled in ink on the front. 
“What is this?” He tapped the envelope with his middle finger.
“I’m not sure, I haven’t seen that before” You answered, and truthfully you hadn’t seen it before.
“It was in the files you brought me this morning, just tucked between some reports. Imagine my surprise when I opened it and found out my trusted secretary is having an office romance with one of my junior finance employees” the smile that hung on Jaemin’s lips did not reach his eyes. 
Your eyes widened “office romance? No no you’ve misunderstood. He just asked me to the gala last week, that's all. I have no idea what the letter is and I- wait. You opened it?” 
The smile faded as he processed your words. Oh Jaemin would not have his secretary on the arm of anyone other than him, and he would make sure of that. Despite the other women around the office, who Jaemin had been making his way through, you managed to get under his skin in all the right ways.
“Sorry, I thought you knew” He started, propping his head up on his hands “secretaries are required to escort their managers to the gala. Mark’s rules” Jaemin grinned lazily.
“Oh! So I’ll still be working, right?” you thought about all the extra things you would need to prepare in this case, starting with a much bigger clutch to keep all Jaemin’s business cards in.
Jaemin smirked, “That’s correct Y/n. You have to be by my side all night. Make sure you let me know the color of your dress so I can plan my tie accordingly”
You nodded, your boss’ phone began to ring echoing throughout his large office. “I’ll bring you a swatch tomorrow morning” You spoke softly as you stood to leave the room.
Jaemin only nodded in response before picking up the phone “Mark!! How goes it over in-” His sentence cut off as the door shut behind you.
“What an odd day” you pondered while sifting through the hundreds of emails in your inbox. Mark had taken the liberty to have Haechan set up all Jaemin’s emails to duplicate so you had copies of important things as well. Unfortunately this also meant you got to see all the emails that lovestruck employees sent him without knowing you could see the confessions as well. After deleting what must have been the 20th email love note, you came across a thread that caught your eye. The email was from another female employee, detailing things she and Jaemin had done the previous night. From the sounds of it, you weren’t the only one engaging in an alleged “office romance”. There were quite a few more like that email, all talking about how they loved it when Jaemin did that “thing”. You weren’t sure what the “thing” was, but from the way he had these ladies begging for him via email correspondence you couldn’t help but be curious. It didn’t help that some had described certain acts in such detail, it was only natural that your head drifted away from work causing you to think about Jaemin’s head between your-
The thought was cut short by a loud thud from the elevator. Upon inspection you could see the finance junior who asked you to the gala had dropped a box of their belongings on the floor. The security guard who was with them helped gather their belongings back into the supply box before giving them a reassuring pat on the shoulder. You thought about going over to ask what happened, but a ping from your inbox beat you to it. ‘I WAS WRONGLY FIRED BY NA JAEMIN” was the subject line, there was no body to the email. Just that one subject line that left chills down your spine. You glanced to your boss’ door then back to your computer screen, the email was sent to everyone on the finance floor. It wasn’t long before chatter began amongst your colleagues on the floor. Everyone was curious to know about their former colleague scorned, making incredibly obvious passes by the now barren desk that once housed the junior finance employee. Jaemin seemed unbothered by the office bustle, opting to send you a teams chat asking for you to accompany him out of the office for his suit fitting for the gala. 
-
The interior of the store was full of mannequins decked out in name brand clothing that had your bank account near tears. Though you were only here to keep an eye on Jaemin’s emails and schedule for the day, he kept asking for your input on the suits he chose. The swatch you had at home would have to wait for another day, though he assured you it would be no hassle to have a tie ordered into the office in the correct color. 
“Well? Does this make me seem intimidating enough?” He turned his head over his shoulder to ask you. 
There was simply no denying the fact that Jaemin WORE the clothes, they did not wear him. He looked stunning in everything, so much so that you kept catching your mind slipping off to imagine the things he could do in the dressing room. Your eyes must’ve lingered for too long without speaking, as Jaemin chuffed a laugh. 
“I’m so sorry, yes it looks great!” you smile warmly at him, just as another ping comes through on his work phone. An email from Mark asking about the firing of the finance colleague and why he is now receiving multiple emails from the distressed former employee.
Jaemin cocks his head, one brow raised in question “Something the matter?”
You lock the phone quickly and look up at where he stands on the pedestal for his fitting. “Just Mark asking about an employee who was fired earlier, apparently he is now receiving emails stating that he was wrongfully terminated.” You stare, waiting for a reaction from him that never comes. 
“Ah yes, he was fraternizing with other employees. Can’t have my department become a cesspool now, can I?” His answer is cold as ice, his face revealing no indication of what he is thinking.
You can’t help but laugh at his reference, as if he hadn’t been sleeping with multiple employees from different departments. “What seems to be so funny, Y/n?” 
“Oh, nothing. Just your cesspool reference was funny” You roll your eyes, not expecting him to continue prodding. But he does just that.
“And why, pray tell, is it funny? Is my finance department a joke to you?” His eyes narrow, the shop steward who was pinning the suit even stops momentarily to give you a glance.
You need a moment to collect your thoughts. To try and decide just where you should begin with this. “You know Haechan set up my email so that I get duplicates of all the emails sent to you, right?” 
Jaemin nods thoughtfully, before his eyes widen in realization. “You get all my emails?” 
You bob your head “every single one of them. Mark insisted it was set up that way so you can never say you just missed a meeting invite in your swaths of emails.”
He pinches the bridge of his nose, eyes closed in frustration. “Y/n, what have you been seeing?” his foot tapping against the stained wood of the pedestal.
“Just the usual. Multiple emails from Mark about meetings, Renjun sending gala updates, Haechan providing timelines for software updates, Jeno sending memes that he has made instead of marketing campaigns, Jisung sending you meeting schedules with investors for the week, Chenle sending selfies mostly.” You shrug, pleased with your answer. 
“That’s it? Nothing else?” His tone is tense and his eyes are fixed on you, gluing you to the spot on the bench.
“Finance employees sending you updated reports too. Oh! And just the casual love confession, or excruciatingly detailed emails from your lovers” You smirk at him.
“I see.” Jaemin steps down, shooing the shop steward away as he strides towards you, “and tell me, Y/n. Do you read all of those excruciatingly detailed emails?” He leans down slightly, your faces mere inches apart.
You wet your lips, noticing Jaemin’s eyes flick down to your mouth before coming back up to meet your gaze. “Yes.”
He straightens back to his full height, now towering over where you sat. “Interesting indeed” he mutters before turning back to the shop employee to continue with his fitting.
-
The next morning you had a large iced americano sitting on the edge of your desk for your boss, along with the fabric swatch. It was odd, seldom did you beat Jaemin to the office. But today you felt extra jittery, especially after how hot his eyes had felt on you yesterday during his fitting. In fact, it was a shock that you managed to get a few hours of sleep. You had tossed and turned all night, thoughts of Jaemin taking you in the dressing room after your conversation had taken your mind hostage. A few times throughout the night you had awoken in a cold sweat, finally deciding to just get up at 5am instead of trying to get a few more hours of rest. That was how you ended up at your desk at 6:30, a large cup of tea clutched in your hands as you sifted through more meeting invites and emails. 
“Good morning Y/n. You’re awfully early.” Jaemin smiled warmly, a glint of something else shone in his eyes.
You gestured lazily to the cup of coffee on the edge of your desk “That’s for you, the swatch too”
His smile dropped as he stared at the coffee and the swatch “your dress is red?”
“Yes” you nodded before adding “I hope that’s alright”
“That will be just fine, I just so happen to have a tie that I think is the same color.” Jaemin fixed a tight smile before heading into his office and closing the door.
A few hours later a gorgeous intern from accounting came by, stopping at your desk “I have an appointment with Mr. Na” She smiled.
“Sure, just a moment” you returned her smile while getting up to knock on your boss’ door. 
“Send her in.” Jaemin said through the thick oak door before you could even let him know his one o’clock was here. 
-
She left an hour later, hair messier than it was when she arrived and her stockings had noticeable runs down both legs. All you could do was cock a brow as she breezed past with her blush stained cheeks. ‘I’m sure I’ll get an email about that later’ you thought, mentally rolling your eyes. Moments later your boss appeared at his door, fixing his tie nonchalantly. 
“Y/n, take the rest of the day off before the gala tonight. I’ll pick you up at 7 tonight, alright?” His voice was cold and detached, much like it had been at the store.
“Sure, thank you. I will see you then” It was no use putting up a fight. And it was certainly no use to ask him what had been on the tip of your tongue since yesterday. All you wanted was to know why that employee had been fired, and if their claim had any merit.
-
True to his word, Jaemin arrived at 7 on the dot. A swanky black car pulled up outside, the driver meeting you by the door for you to get in. After the door was shut you noticed Jaemin’s eyes fixated on you, suddenly the tight red dress you opted for felt all too revealing. 
He licked his lips slowly before speaking “I get the feeling there’s something you want to ask me, Y/n?”
“Why did you fire that employee that asked me out and gave me that letter?” You asked, Jaemin just stared at you in shock, clearly not expecting that to be the question.
“I- well. He had falsified a few reports so I was going to let him go anyway, but…” He trailed off, turning to look out the window instead of at you. “I thought you were going to ask about the escort from earlier” 
You nearly choked on your own breath “Escort? I thought she was from accounting!”
Jaemin hung his head in defeat “I know, I know. I’m sorry. I was never good at processing things. Instead of thinking though the issue I jumped straight to numbness, and I apologize” 
You simply could not believe your ears, you had figured that’s what was going on. But somehow it still took you by surprise. “Wait, why are you telling me all this?” you couldn’t help but ask.
“When I interviewed you for that sales role, I had such bad thoughts. I decided to tell you I needed an assistant instead. But I had one already. I fired her to give you the role. I just wanted that pretty little ass outside my office. I wanted to rub it in everyone’s faces that I had the hottest secretary. But then you got that letter, and I noticed you starting to get a little too much attention than I liked. And I didn’t expect to like you this much and-” He rambled on before stopping abruptly to look at you. 
Tears welled in your eyes, threatening to fall “two people lost their jobs because of me?” Your voice felt raw.
“Technically only one, the other guy was getting fired for fraud anyway. It was just a coincidence. And I didn’t fire my former secretary, I relocated her to another department. That was poor phrasing on my end” Jaemin reached for your hands, you foolishly let him hold on.
This was an enormous pill to swallow. “So let me get this straight.” You squeezed Jaemin’s hands. “You removed your secretary, hired me because you think I’m hot, got jealous when I was getting attention, forced me to be your date for this gala, and then hired an escort to take out your frustrations instead of just coming clean and talking to me?”
“That’s about it, yeah” Jaemin nodded enthusiastically.
“I quit.” You pulled your hands back to your lap.
Jaemin’s smile fell, his eyes showing the panic he was feeling. “No, no you can’t quit. Who’s going to read my emails to me and copy down all the meeting notes that I don’t feel like doing?”
You shrugged “I’m not sure, Jaemin. I just know it won’t be me.” 
The timing was lovely as the car had pulled up to the venue, the driver was already opening the door to help you out. Jaemin clutched your hand desperately. “Please, Y/n. Please just give me the night to make things right.”
You brushed him off “I will accompany you tonight, but tomorrow morning I will be packing my things. I’m sorry”
Jaemin led the way into the gala, his shoulders slumped in defeat. To anyone else, you were sure he looked angry, but you knew the truth. The first hour of the gala was spent greeting fellow colleagues and investors. You stopped to chat with Renjun, praising him for how incredible the party turned out, to which he agreed with a small smile and flushed cheeks. 
“He’s into the party planner he hired” Jaemin leaned down to whisper in your ear.
The sudden closeness took you by surprise, but you couldn’t help but slightly lean back into his chest. The countless champagne flutes did not help the situation, no matter how much you wanted to not be around Jaemin right now, your other desires had taken over. Jaemin’s hand was placed firmly on your hip, holding you in place. 
“I think it’s time we get you home sweetheart” He spoke softly, looking around to find the nearest exit.
You could only nod, agreeing that it was in fact time to head home. Jaemin kept his grip on your hip as he escorted you through the crowds of people, stopping only once to whisper something to Mark before continuing to the exit. Just as it had been when you arrived, Jaemin’s car and driver were stationed out front. The car door was already open for you two to get in, he helped you into the car and you slumped against him.
-
Sun had streamed in through the large windows of your bedroom bright and early. You cursed yourself for not remembering to shut the curtains before getting into bed last night. Wait, you didn’t have curtains, or the luxurious silk bedding, or a king sized bed. Realization hit you, Jaemin must’ve taken you home. But when you looked over to the other side of the bed you found it still untouched. You were thankfully still in your dress from last night.
After gathering up some courage and taking the Advil that was conveniently left on the nightstand you took off down the hallway of the apartment. On the couch you found your boss, drinking a cup of coffee while leisurely flipping through reports.
“Good morning sleepy girl” He cooed at you.
You squinted back at him “lest you not forget, I quit last night. And you upset me.”
“I recall. I also recall you chirping at me in the car that you wanted me to bring you here and ‘do the things from the emails’ to you” He chuckled, blush crept across your cheeks. 
“I am very sorry. I will head out now.” You started towards the door.
“Y/n. Wait.” Jaemin rose from his place on the sofa, his long strides reaching you quickly. “Now that it’s not a conflict of interest, I was wondering if you would allow me to take you on a date?”
You stared at him, dumbfounded. “A date? Jaemin, you only hired me because you thought I was hot! I’m so pissed off at you! I thought I had merit, I thought I was good at my job!” You were stopped short by Jaemin’s lips on yours.
The kiss seemed to have surprised you both. Both of you stood in shock, just staring at each other. 
“You are” His voice was soft.
“I am what?” Your brows furrowed.
“Good at your job. Mark requested we send you off to another department that needs a manager. I said no, because I need you to keep me organized. I have never made it to so many meetings!” He grinned at you, placing his hands on your shoulders.
“Could I move to a different department to be a manager?” Your head tilted in question.
Jaemin breathed a sigh of relief “Yes, you absolutely can. I can always bring back my old secretary in your place”
“Then I will.” You beamed happily.
“You will what? Move departments?” Jaemin’s hands squeezed your shoulders in anticipation.
“Well yes obviously.” you rolled your eyes. “But also, I’ll let you take me out.”
Jaemin pulled you into another kiss, this one much less abrupt than the last. His lips were soft against yours, and his hands worked their way down your body. Your fingers combed through his hair, stopping occasionally to tug slightly. 
“Oh we have to stop. I still think about your first day when you had to change in my office.” He confessed.
You smirked at him, “That’s alright. I think about it too.”
“I’ll have the driver take you home and I’ll pick you up tonight. Wear something red again. It looks stunning on you.” He kissed you one last time before sending you off.
-
The next week was a do over of your first day, but this time as a manager for partner relations. But instead of taking an Uber, you arrived with the CFO in his personal car. 
“I’ll see you after work sweetheart. Let me know if I need to fire anyone for you” Jaemin winked before placing a kiss on your lips before exiting the elevator onto the finance floor. 
“Ugh, you are so lucky” another employee in the office wined before exiting at the next stop.
The doors closed, leaving you alone in the elevator. The biggest grin plastered across your face as you thought aloud “Yeah, I am pretty lucky, aren’t I?”
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hyun-xxe · 7 months ago
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You're Mine, Silly! (Yandere!Jungkook x F!Reader) PART 1
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Summary: You've only met him once at a fan meet. You were excited and happy since he was your bias. Thats how you saw him. However, Jungkook saw things differently.
warnings: none
PART 1
There he was, sitting down right in front of you. A part of you still couldn't believe that he was literally a foot away, smiling at you. The sparkle in his eyes bright and shiny, just like his smile.
You swore everything inside you melted away and no thought was left except for Jungkook.
"Hey there!" he waves, grabbing your hand in his, "What's your name beautiful?" he asks, rubbing your palm with his thumb.
It took everything in you not to pass out right in front of you so you mustered up the courage to speak. "Hi!! My name is Y/N! I'm so excited to finally meet you!" you smile brightly, jumping up and down.
"Excited you say?" he smirks, leaning closer, his cologne spreading up toward you, giving you a whiff of his scent. "What makes me so exciting to you?" he questions.
You pretend to think on it real hard when in reality it was so fucking obvious why. "Hmmmm well, I can't deny that you are my bias. You're such a talented singer, song writer, are funny, and so adorable."
His eyes softened as you rambled about things you like about him. With every word you said and the way you seemed so passionate about how you feel made him feel a certain way.
When you realized you were rambling, you felt your face become hot and you removed your hand from his hold. Embarrassment filled you as you scratched the back of your neck, "I'm sorry," you apologize, "I didn't mean to ramble off your ear." you laugh.
Your laugh was cute, something he would love to hear often.
"No, don't apologize." he says and reached over to, once again, hold your hand in his. "Please, don't feel embarrassed. It was cute."
With his free hand, he reached over and grabbed your album to sign. Jungkook did not want to let go of your soft hand. It felt nice in his, like it belonged there.
When you saw him sign it with a message to your name, you opened your mouth. "Can you also put Elijah?" you ask.
he quirked his eyebrow up, confused at your request but nevertheless wrote down the name, "Is he your brother?" Jungkook asked.
You shake your head, "He's my boyfriend! He was the one who bought my ticket actually!" you smiled, "He really wanted to come today, but there was an emergency at work."
Jungkook felt himself freeze. You have a boyfriend? What?
It didn't make any sense. How could you ramble on about how perfect Jungkook is and how adorable he is, only to now say you're in a relationship?
"Oh really?" he mumbled under his breath, trying to contain his cool. "You didn't mention him before."
"it slipped my mind because I was so excited to meet you guys. You and Jimin are his biases."
He didn't know how to feel. Certainly you were flirting with him, there was no doubt, but now you're saying you're with someone. It just didn't make any sense.
"I wish he could've made it." Jungkook says, knowing damn well he didn't mean it.
The bell rung, signaling that it was time to rotate. He didn't want you to go and hated how he only had five minutes to talk to you.
You picked up your album to move on, hoping he would let go of your other hand, but he didn't. In fact, it was as if he held it tighter. You tried releasing your hand, but it was firmly held in his.
Was this by mistake?
Looking to your right, you saw the others behind grow impatient as they looked your way. A lot of the other fans caught glimpse of Jungkook still holding your hand and looking at you with full eyes.
He wasn't letting go and it made you scared because you didn't want to get yelled at by staff and even get kicked out.
In the corner of your eye, you saw a staff make their way toward you and you tried your best to get your hand out, but to no avail. However, there was a savior that stepped in.
Jin placed his hand on Jungkook's shoulder, gaining the youngest's attention. "Uhm, are you okay, Jungkook?" he asked, looking between you both. "The bell rang almost a minute ago, let go of the poor ladies hand."
It took everything in Jungkook to not yell at his hyung, but he obeyed his orders.
"I'm sorry Y/N!" he said, eyes pleading with you, "I got lost in thought and didn't mean for this to happen!"
He was loud and everyone was looking, it made you feel hot with embarrassment, but seeing how he is right now made you feel bad for some reason. As if it was your fault.
"it's ok!" you say, moving in front of Jin, "No need to apologize."
After that, everything felt quick for you. Seeing other members made you happy and it was something you would never forget, especially with Jungkook. He didn't mean to hold your hand that long, so you didn't really think much of it. Besides, you mentioned your boyfriend and your love for Elijah will triumph over Jungkook any day.
However, it was the next day that made things go downhill. You woke up to your phone going off every second. it scared you, made you think a relative died and that your siblings or parents were trying to get ahold of you.
But when you opened your sister's messages, your eyes popped out.
sister: Go check Twitter right now!!
sister: Y/N, WAKE UP!!! THIS IS IMPORTANT!!
sister: if u dont wake up rn ill fucking drive over to your apartment and nuke your door down
You message her quickly, telling her that you're checking right now. Opening the app, it was the first thing that popped up.
WHO IS THE GIRL THAT CAPTURED JK'S HEART?
Was the first headline you saw. You prayed hard and deep that it was something totally different and did not involve you at all.
You clicked on the tweet and your heart dropped. It was clearly a picture of you at the fan meet. it was the moment when Jungkook held onto your hand tightly and didn't let go. Even now you can clearly see the soft look in his face as he stared at you.
How stupid were you for not realizing that fans could take things the wrong way and make it to what it really isn't!
You read the tweet and it made your blood boil.
I was at BTS' fan meet last night and what I saw made me gasp! When the bell rung for the fans to move onto the next member, there was a moment that made everyone shocked. Jungkook wouldn't let go of this girls hand! I don't know her name or who she is, but when I zoomed in, you can see the look in his eyes that he had for her! It was adorable and sweet! The way he held her hand made me swoon!
#BTS #whoIsTheGirl #Jungkook
You scrolled through other tweets, some of them confused, others shocked, a few of them were hate, but a lot of them were excited. It pissed you off. This wasn't Wattpad, this only should happen in cringe stories. You were dating the love of your life and this could seriously ruin things.
Going to Elijah's contact, you tried calling him twice, but he didn't pick up. You texted him asking if he was ok, but he just read your message.
Everything was going downhill so you grabbed your stuff and headed over to your boyfriends apartment.
Upon arriving, you knocked several times for him to answer because there was no way in hell you were leaving without explaining things. When he opened the door, you invited yourself in without asking.
"What are you doing?" he asks, closing and locking the door behind him, "whats wrong?"
You tilted your head, confused by his actions. Is he this mad that he looks so calm?
"I'm here to talk about whats happening on twitter and want to give you my side." you say.
His eyebrows knit together in confusion. "Something on twitter? Care to elaborate?"
"Why are you acting confused? Aren't you angry? I tried texting and calling but you ignored them."
He laughed and walked up to you, giving your forehead and kiss, "I am sorry, honey. I was on the phone with my sister and was trying to calm her down from her first heartbreak. When I saw your text, my phone died."
Elijah then walked to the counter and showed his phone with the screen showing the black background and white apple icon, signifying that it was just turning on from it being dead.
You felt the worry ease just a little as you finally calmed down. "oh thank god." you whisper, placing your hand over your chest. "You scared me so much."
he chuckles and stands in front of you, "Whats happening though? Tell me."
So you told him everything, about how Jungkook kept holding your hand, fans took pictures, thought of something else, and now you're trending on Twitter. You showed him the tweets, pictures, and tags.
His eyes scanned each and every one of them, and after he smiled and chuckled. "Oh Y/N." he gives you a tight hug, "Did you think I was angry about this? That I believed it?"
You nodded your head in his chest.
"You're such a dork." he ruffles your hair, "I would've called your if anything, and besides this is not something you would do. You're loyal, and kind, and I trust you. It was a mistake and the fans fault for taking things the wrong way."
You felt like there was a heavy weight that was lifted from your shoulder. He understood and listened carefully to your words and it made you realize how lucky you are to have him as your boyfriend.
He tried his best to cheer you up, making you food and putting on your favorite show.
When you got the notification that Jungkook was live on Weverse, you and your boyfriend stopped what you were doing to watch it, hoping he would clear up any rumor.
"Hello," he says, waving at the camera. He waited for more people to come on and just kept staring at the lense. When enough people joined, he started talking more.
"'did you see what is trending on twitter?' Yeah, I have actually. She looks pretty in that picture." he says, smiling to himself.
You tilted your head, confused by his words. Shouldn't he shoot down the rumor now instead of fueling it by saying how pretty you are?
"You guys should know that she is just has pretty as her name. Everything about her is flawless." he laughs to himself and reads another comment "'are you guys dating?' I guess this is where I have to be honest and upfront with you guys."
You felt relieved that he was finally going to dispell the rumors between you both and you can finally be at peace from all of this.
"Yes, we are dating. We wanted to keep it on the down low and she wanted to surprise me at the event, but I guess my love for her got the best of me."
Your blood ran cold and your eyes widened. Did you hear him correctly? Was he being serious? You were hoping he said something else and you just needed to check your hearing?
You turned to your boyfriend and see that hes also wide eye, frozen in his place, and even shaking just a little.
"Please, army, im asking you guys to refrain from getting into her privacy. She is human after all, my love and my girl. It would mean the world to me if you showed kindness and love to our relationship."
Why is he doing this? You didn't understand why he was saying these things and what made him attached to you. "What the actual fuck!" you screamed out, throwing your phone.
"How long have we been dating?" he reads aloud, "Since five months already." Jungkook smiles, "I cant believe time has flown by so fast!" he chuckles. "Do the members like her? Of course they do! They're so protective over her, but not too much. After all, shes my girl."
You were sick to your stomach hearing him speak more. The realization dawned on you from last night and why he kept on holding your hand tight, even when you had to move on. Him being your bias sickened you as you realized who this man truly is.
To his fans, he was the kindest and sweetest person ever, his eyes fooled everyone, even you. But now this?
Seeing your boyfriend on the couch, not saying a word broke your heart.
"Please, tell me you don't believe him babe," your eyes started to get watered, "I never met him before last night."
He finally looked at you, swallowing his spit and shaking his head, "Babe, its ok, I believe you." he answeres, "But t-that man," he points at your phone, "Hes fucking crazy. Sick in the head for thinking that. What the hell!?"
You walked up to your boyfriend, giving him a tight hug. "Don't worry babe, I'm going to fix this. I promise."
You left later that night and when you got home, you emptied your purse and thats when you noticed the album you brought with you to the fan meet.
Opening it up, your eyes almost bulged out of your head when seeing his sick note you left you.
You're the most prettiest girl I've ever met with the prettiest name. Please, I want to see you soon. Take care!
Below that had a phone number on it with the words next to it being "Contact me anytime."
You were stupid and dumb, but this needed to be fixed once and for all. Picking up your phone and putting in that number, you waited for the caller to pick up.
It went to voicemail.
You knew this was stupid and it wouldn't work, so you placed down your phone and screamed into your pillow. He's messing up the relationship between you and your man for no reason.
How could a lovely time turn into your worse? Were you actually curs-
*RING!*
Suddenly, your phone lights up with the number you put in and you almost chocked on your spit.
Slowly reaching out, you picked it up and answered, waiting for the person to speak.
"Who is th-this?" you ask, swallowing a nervous spit.
"You called me, shouldn't I be the one asking?"
The voice sounded familiar, but you didn't want to assume that it was him, however you were built on frustration and you let it all out.
"I know this is you, Jungkook. I found the number you left in my album. You are a sick bastard for what you're doing!" You yelled, "What the fuck gave you the idea that we are dating? Why the fuck are you saying this when I've never met you in my entire life.
"Do you not understand that you're ruining my relationship that I have with my boyfriend!?" You yelled into the phone, a tear slipping down.
The line stayed quiet and it pissed you off even more. Even if it wasn't Jungkook on the line, it had to be someone close to him since he wrote this number down by heart.
"Oh, its nice hearing from you finally!" his voice rung out, almost too happy, "How have you been, love?"
You felt the anger rushing in all over again as you laughed, "Are you fucking kidding me!? Did you not hear what I said??"
"I did, yes. But why should that concern me?" he asks, seemingly not caring about the situation he created.
"Did you not care to consider the fact that you're ruining my life? People around me are calling me a whore, they think I left my boyfriend because I met you! Do you not get it?!"
He chuckles a bit, "Don't listen to them, their words should mean nothing. Besides, what do you want me to do about it?"
You froze in place as you were left dumb founded. Is this man serious? "Are you fucking kidding me!? I want you to fix this! We aren't dating and I have a boyfriend, Elijah is his name. Not Jungkook."
Jungkook was quiet for a few seconds before speaking up, "You know, I don't think your boyfriend would be happy with how you were fliritng with me at the event."
You laughed at his stupidity, almost close to hanging up and calling the cops even. "Flirting with you? How was I flirting with you!?"
"The things you said about me being adorbale, funny and all of that. Don't play stupid, its not cute. What would your boyfriend do when he hears the things you said about me?"
"You cannot be serious." you say, angry and confused, "That wasn't fliritng, Jungkook! I was genuonely complimenting you since you were my bias! You need to get out of delusional land!"
"Love, you expect me to go back online and tell the world that what I said isn't true?" he asked.
"Well, fucking obviously!" you screamed.
"Yeah, I can't do that. Besides, what would the fans think of me when I tell them that all that I said was a lie?" he says.
"Well everything was a lie! You created this mess!"
He sighs, "Y/N," you forgot he knew your name, "I'm not taking back my words. I genuinely like you and want something."
You pulled your hair in disbelief, "Jungkook, did you not hear me say that I have a boyfriend 50 times!? There is no us and will never be an us."
He was quiet and all you could hear was tapping. "If you're not going to say anything, I will."
"Love, do you know the power I have?" He asks, "I am a rich man, me and my members bring in 5 BILLION dollars every year. That being said, I have the power to do anything and that anything involves you. Army listens to what I say and eat it up, if I go online with tears in my eyes talking about how hear broken I am.... you can kiss your life and privacy goodbye."
You couldn't believe what you were hearing. "J-Jungkook, are you threatening me?" you asked, so shocked that you swear your heart stopped pounding.
"No, I would never. I'm just letting you know the consequences of what might happen." he says in a soft, degrading tone, "Listen, why don't we meet up and talk about this? Yeah? I'll send you an address first thing tomorrow. How does that sound?"
"No! I'm not going to meet you, are you crazy!?" you yell, gripping your phone tighter in your hands.
"I wonder how army will feel when they hear you say how 'fucking stupid' I am, and how delusional I am for simply being in love." he sighs, "I would hate for your reputation to plummet."
The feeling of your heart sinking is the worse feeling in the entire world. You were helpless and you didn't know what to do, this was completely out of your hands, he was in charge.
"W-why are you doing this to me?" you whisper, tears falling down, "what did I do?"
"Don't cry, my love." he whispers in a soothing tone, "Seeing you for the first time has made me helpless. I knew I needed you in my life. You are the most beautiful human I've ever laid eyes on. Lets talk more about this tomorrow, ok love?"
You didn't feel like talking more, so you stuttered out a yes before hanging up. This man is insane and you knew that if you made the smallest mistake, he has the power to ruin you and your family. What did you do to deserve this?
*PART 2 COMING UP SOON!*
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starberry-cupcake · 14 days ago
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Welcome back!! I hope you're doing well and, if not, I hope my silly ramblings can make your day somewhat better, like the wildcats used to say: we're all in this together ♥
previously, in harrowcita del 9:
this happened
for those of you recently tuning in, this is the tag of all the ramblings
also, I'm officially in the sixth house now, palmolive can't stop me
CHAPTER 46
we're back inside the emperor's bolthole, which is infested
this is what happens when you have a lyctor orgy without the proper protection
gideon is doing her very best to fight the infestation of herald bees swarming and attacking her
she's in harrow's feeble small kitten baby body, so she's dying a lot
I'm gonna try to represent this visually
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gideon keeps apologizing to harrow for getting her bits chewed off and her insides pouring out
and puts emphasis on things she wants harrow to remember
"I saw it eat your thumb—these details are important, so keep up with me—and your thumb was back in the next half minute"
"Child, that bee smashed you"
"I touched your intestines, which is usually what, fourth date"
me:
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so, gideon takes off harrow's excess bones, which are no use to her, and goes further into the emperor's infested bolthole, where she finds mercygirl
mercygirl thinks gideon is harrow at first and, turns out, she was the one who stabbed her
these lyctors istg
can't trust any of them
mercygirl thinks harrow should be grateful that she stabbed her
and she was aware that harrow had "stuffed the soul of the cavalier in the back of her brain"
NOW WE'RE GONNA GET INTO SOME TERRITORY THAT MAKES ME GO ABSOLUTELY BERSERK, SO BEAR WITH ME
I NEED TO GET MY NOTES BACK FROM MY PREVIOUS RECAPS FOR THIS
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she asks what happened with gideon's eyes and, as we have seen in the previous gideon-centric chapter, gideon's eyes are in harrow's face atm, if memory serves
"You're not her—she isn't driving you—but you have her eyes. Why? When they showed me your corpse I didn't think to check the eyes"
"I thought I knew what you were, though I didn't want to believe it..."
now listen, we're starting to tie some loose ends and some of those loose ends are linked very closely to my previous theories
I have been considering the Commander Wake is Gideon's Mom and Has a Personal Connection To Gideon The First and Is The One Connected With The Harrow Notes In Canaan AU for a while now
I need to link the specific recaps where I said this because I need to be transparent about where my brain was at
Evidence A, Evidence B, Evidence C, Evidence D
there's probably more but those are pretty clear
I swear to god if I was right about this I'm gonna screencap my own recap and put it here when the time comes
I've been marinating this one for months
I actually forgot how much of that I had written down in the recaps until I re-read them
mercygirl says that she thought the commander was a bad girl workaholic who put business before family, that she made her "the dolls" and she must have "played silly buggers with the emission" and that "gideon was on her tail"
"And then Gideon ruined everything. Then the commander ruined everything. Then you ruined everything. This could have been over eighteen years ago"
apparently gideon the first was "obsessed" with the commander, which accounts for some of the notes harrow read
I'LL GET BACK TO THAT WHEN WE GET TO THE SLEEPER, MY THEORIES CONTINUE
mercygirl starts calling gideon all sorts of names, including mutant, and keeps being bothered about her eyes
"Lipochrome. Recessive. You are the evidence. He lied to us...and you are all the proof I needed" "Cytherea would have known as soon as she looked at you"
is gideon the first gideon's dad??????? I mean, I always though he might have Something with the mom but my money was on gideon being made through science rather than Traditional Means
I mean, having lyctor genes in some way would account for gideon being a demigod, something I said with those words when I was reading gideon
also, remember when not!dulcinea told gideon she was prettier than the other gideon?? because I've never forgotten
mercygirl confirms that gideon the first was sent to kill gideon's mom
who, according to mercygirl, would have hated to be called a mom
mamá luchona intensifies
all of which aligns with my theory very nicely so far
she calls gideon more names, including "abomination, you heresy, you failed ambition nineteen years too late"
gideon reacts not wanting mercygirl to touch her instinctively
man, my theories are RIGHT THERE to be fully connected I'm BITING THE DESK
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but there's no time for any more talk because mercygirl is trying to kill gideon in harrow's body
but she is stopped
she is shot
by not!dulcinea
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but I don't think this is not!dulcinea, I previously mentioned her maybe being used by someone, not sure if it's possession or being used or what's going on but I don't think this is her
I thought about gideon the first being the one to do it but if he wanted harrow dead, I'm not sure he'd save gideon now
not!dulcinea says "with a tone that wasn't" hers: "goodbye"
gideon ends the chapter with "what the fuck is going on?"
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CHAPTER 47
we're back at canaan au and it's time to perform an exorcism
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harrow has a new note
I've been connecting those notes to gideon's mom possibly commander wake (as linked above)
the latest note continues to add to my theory
"end of the line. falling. oxygen can't last the distance and won't redirect power from the payload. instead I will make you watch every moment as I get the last privilege you cannot enjoy you bygone son of a bitch. I hope you're both as sorry as I am."
I still think this is gideon's mom because that's how she died, I mean, she got to the ninth in a suit without air and gideon still had some, allegedly
I've been thinking that one of the two people involved in the situationship triangle described in the notes was gideon the first, and that maybe the other was dr reverend emperor john
he's the most likely to be a bygone son of a bitch, so maybe I'm right
so, if harrow connects the notes with the spirit that's haunting her
and I'm connecting them to gideon's mom....
what if it's her that's haunting harrow?????
I mean, Waker
I NEED TO STOP GETTING INTO THEORY TANGENTS
anyway, all of the ghoulie ghostie friends are getting together for a sleepover exorcism
I didn't use this when I should have, back when the different aus were going by, but here it is
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real!dulcinea says "Pal always said I'd be the death of him. And I was..."
he died being a weenie but he's not all the way dead, so it's fine
harrow questions why everyone wants to help her but everyone's totally fine with all this, for different reasons
real!dulcinea is "horny for revenge" (that's a tshirt for the seventh girlies right there)
protozoa is there because duty is his full personality
abby is really grateful to be asked to help (she also really likes tombs, very lara croft of her)
magnus loves his wife
ortus wants a redemption arc and now has a polycule
martita is behaving better than judith
abby asks harrow if there's anything she can remember from the slasher waker sleeper to try to pinpoint who tf it is
there's a suit, blood, a gun and gideon's sword, which is the only thing harrowcita recognizes and doesn't know where it comes from
my money is on gideon's mom, commander wake, probably also the woman in the shuttle poster that harrow saw but didn't recognize back when she met camilla
I'M PUTTING MORE CHIPS IN MY BETS EVEN IF I GET NO MORE INFO RN
harrow is very interested in how abby and magnus make it work as a married couple who are also a necro and a cav
I wonder why she's so interested
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anyway, everything goes to shit on the exorcism
like, it goes really, really badly
group project off the rails bad
I mean, they didn't even have blood
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apparently the spirit is also tethered to an object out there (the sword??????? possibly?????)
and she (she's a SHE) is pretty much invincible and shooting everyone and performing parkour while she's at it
harrow says camilla would be impressed, which is the highest praise
the sleeper waker slasher potentially gideon's mom (but not sure because it hasn't been confirmed yet) calls harrow by her name, but in a way that sounds like she's never said it before
she says it like a curse, which maybe means she knows, to some degree, how harrow was made????
she's basically doing whatever she wants over here, shooting ghosts, punching ghosts, throwing them around, regenerating, not bleeding, pulling guns out of thin air
I mean, ok, we got it, calm down lady
where was this energy when it was time to kill the emperor
she says there's "no magic" there and that "she's been doing this for years"
she wants harrow, so she can kill her and use her body to "finish it"
WHICH MAYBE MEANS KILLING THE EMPEROR???
OH MAN I DO WANT THAT TO HAPPEN
BUT NOT AT THE COST OF HARROW
also, mrs potentially gideon's mom, even if harrow dies, there's also gideon in the body right now so, it's a bit crowded atm
maybe find another way to kill the emperor
use not!dulcinea instead, if you can get the current tenant to leave
the chapter ends with: "ortus cleared his throat"
MAN, I HOPE HE DROPS SOME POETRY LINES, WE SURELY NEED THAT
and that's it for today!!!!!things are certainly heating up in the emperor's bolthole!!!! see you soon for the next installment, fingers crossed for my theories!!!
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twig-tea · 3 months ago
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Why We Are Gives Me Anxiety
I have been fighting myself on this We Are post for weeks because I wanted to make sure I knew what I wanted to say and was able to say it. I feel the need to say off the top that I don’t begrudge anyone who enjoyed this show and I’m genuinely glad it brought comfort to people. The show in and of itself, as 16 hour-long episodes of fluff (shout-out to @stuffnonsenseandotherthings for using this word to pinpoint the genre for this show, because it’s perfect), is not offensive or bad or wrong or any judgmental or moralistic word. And it does some things well; the centrality of the friend group was a lovely aspect to this show, and the chemistry in the friendship group scenes was on point. All of the couples have good romantic chemistry as well, and the show is packed with butterflies-inducing moments. 
That being said, I did not enjoy watching this show. I watch television mostly for the story; This show felt more like watching 16 special episodes for a show I hadn’t seen (I think this can be attributed to the point made by @italianpersonwithashippersheart in her post here that the show assumes the audience comes to the show with a pre-existing buy-in to the ships). The lack of overarching narrative structure of We Are gave my brain nothing to hold onto and I spent so much of every episode futilely trying to figure out how scenes worked with what had come before, what the show was trying to say, what these characters were thinking–all of which I knew was the wrong way to be watching, but it’s the way my brain works, so I spent a lot of the show frustrated. In short, this show wasn’t for me. 
But that’s not why I feel the need to write about it. Shows are fully allowed to not be for me, I usually can differentiate between when a show is doing something I don’t like well, or when it’s failing at its own goals. And I don’t begrudge people with different taste getting catered to sometimes; my refrain is that most problems of representation are not solved by calling for less of something, and rather than wanting something not to be made, I’d rather champion for more and a greater variety of content. And lord knows there’s enough BL to go around these days (shouting out @respectthepetty’s post along these lines, which I loved) . But We Are still worries me, and I’ve been trying to find a way to articulate that my concerns are not actually about the show itself, in isolation, but rather about how it feels like part of a pattern. This is my best attempt at laying that out. It’s going to get a little ramble-y, so apologies in advance.
Shout-out to @bengiyo who first articulated this anxiety in his post from relatively early in the show’s run . Ben gets into some of where I’m coming from with concerns about what this show means for the genre in this post, which as he mentions we've chatted about in DMs. I’m really grateful to him for these conversations because in isolation, I worried that I was being alarmist. It was helpful to have confirmation that he was feeling the same way so that I could get out of my own head.  
Ben mentions in his post that New Siwaj has been in this business a long time, and I, like Ben, have jived with him for years because he manages to imbue queer angst into his shows in a way that resonates with me, even when he’s had missteps. I'm going to lay out some of the major highlights of his work for those who haven't followed New for years.
He was an editor on Love Sick, arguably the start of the Thai BL genre as we know it today, and a show full to the brim of queer angst. He directed Make It Right, one of my favourite Thai BL comedy series. This show was also an ensemble centered around a friendship group (though admittedly it didn’t balance the friendship and romance content as strongly as We Are), and it covers so many topics that felt refreshing at the time and still are rare (morning-after sex visits to the clinic because things went poorly, hooking up on the apps, sex acts beyond just penetration, suicidality, I could go on). He also was involved in the GMMTV Waterboyy series–this was his first work for GMMTV that I am aware of. That show had a lot of issues but did explore internalized homophobia and bullying.
He worked as a cinematographer on En of Love, which is again similar to We Are in that it has several couples connected by a friendship group (and is several novels in one series), but each couple was given its own miniseries instead of bundling them into one show. En of Love also still dealt with some serious queer angst, especially in the Love Mechanics story [Sidenote, Niink, the director for En of Love, stuck with New and moved on to work for Wabi Sabi].
At this point, New created his own company, Studio Wabi Sabi, which he's said in interviews was to gain more creative control over what he was working on. And his stories became arguably even more explicitly queer and inclusive of queer trauma. He screenwrote and produced Love By Chance (which folks may not remember or know, but that core story starts off with Pete being blackmailed for being gay until Ae convinces him to come out to his mother and shut down the leverage for blackmail, and a good chunk of Pete’s character arc is unlearning internalized homophobia and not seeing himself as ‘corrupting’ Ae) and then Until We Meet Again. The queer angst in UWMA probably doesn’t need my help spelling out, but just in case anyone doesn’t know the summary, this show was about a queer couple who committed suicide in the face of homophobia in the 1980s, and were reborn and given another chance to be together in present day. I did want to note that in both of these series (LBC and UWMA) the core romance itself has no major conflicts; both AePete and DeanPharm felt like they were intentionally side-stepping so many of the usual BL drama tropes of jealousy and misunderstandings through trust and communication. Dean and Pharm’s story took that even further by having so many of the usual drama pitfalls for a gay couple just not be a problem; their only drama comes from their past lives, in a beautiful exploration of the breaking of intergenerational trauma. So many external threats to their relationship ended up being non-starters, and this was my version of a comfort series for that reason. 
From there, New started working with GMMTV again, and directed My Gear and Your Gown. This series was, to my knowledge, the first GMMTV BL series to mention HIV and to show characters getting tested at the clinic, and while it wasn’t perfect representation (didn’t get into PrEP, treated HIV as a death sentence), it felt like an important milestone.
[I’m skipping the sequels and specials he did for series I already talked about, because they don’t feel that important to the story I’m telling here and this is already so long, but I wanted to acknowledge that I’m not covering everything in his oeuvre.]
He then directed 7 Project, which had some serious storylines dealing with bullying and struggling with life in the closet, out of Wabi Sabi, and then Star and Sky out of GMMTV. Star in My Mind included one of the main characters in a beard relationship for years, and some controversy over the adaptation choices to make Daonuea (Dunk’s character) less polite than in the books. There was drama around the pronouns and characterization in that show (both Daonuea and Khabkluen use guu/mueng in the series, but in the novel, Daonuea uses rao; he also curses in the series and novel fans complained that he was too ‘masculine’). I thought it was an interesting attempt at a departure from BL character tropes to try to make Daonuea more evenly matched with Khabkluen in terms of his gender presentation in the show. Sky in Your Heart also included some angst about whether people of a particular station could be gay. Both of these shows (SIMM and SIYH) were also very trope-y, but they had clear throughlines. 
My Only 12%, the next show New directed out of Wabi Sabi, contains one of my favourite moments in all of BL, in which Seeiw sees Love of Siam and cries because it makes him realize he’s gay. There’s this heartfelt moment where he asks his sister, if there’s nothing wrong with being gay, why doesn’t the film let the gay characters have a happy ending? Despite the weird PSA ending, this show remains one of my favourites.
This is an aside but I’ve long been fascinated about this moment in New’s history: he played himself in War of Y, as a director of BL who is sick of being forced to make BL shows full of fanservice; he treats the actors with disdain and cuts marketable high heat scenes from the show which makes everyone nervous for the show’s future. Later we see him and the actor characters on set for My Only 12%, much happier. I ask myself about this moment at least once a week: Did he write this self-insert? Did someone else write the character and he just played it, and the similarities to his style were (were not?) a coincidence? I hope someone knows and tells me one day,
From there, New functioned as an Executive Producer of Dear Doctor, I’m Coming for Soul [I think this was the first outsourced project by Wabi Sabi]. This series’ entire plot is a metaphor for living in the closet and waiting for the time when the main couple can be together fully without having to hide. 
He directed A Boss and a Babe for GMMTV (which had its problems for sure, but also had Cher as an out gay man at the workplace dealing with casual homophobia in a way that was extremely satisfying), and then Between Us, which is maybe the least queer feeling show Wabi Sabi produced on its own, but did go into the issues of dating and the closet while trying to become a star (if I’ve forgotten something from this show let me know, I only watched it the once). One of the things that was so strange about this show was it being a sequel to UWMA but not engaging with the same themes. The only mention of real world queerness I can remember was the acknowledgment that they can’t get married in Thailand and Dean and Pharm discussing again going abroad and getting married there. 
Absolute Zero was a complete mess of a show; New directed this one for Wabi Sabi, and it has some similarities to UWMA in the sense of there being an attempt at saving the gays from the bury your gays trope, this time via time loop rather than reincarnation, but it did not take the issues it raised seriously enough (including the age gap created between the two characters by virtue of time travel). 
And that leads us to We Are for GMMTV, which as Pluem (@happypotato48)  wrote in his excellent post about this, includes Toey using nu and other 'feminine' or 'youthful' sounding language, but also apparently dropped the main conflict of the novel between Phum and his father (because his father disapproved of Peem).
Why did I go through all of that? Because I wanted to lay out how I've watched New Siwaj’s career go from finding a way to tell incredibly poignant and healing queer narratives (by creating his own company, and fitting these moments into the GMMTV series he did work on) to stripping out queerness from the shows he’s creating in the last year or so.
And this is a pattern we’re seeing more widely at GMMTV in particular, but also in Thai QL more widely. This is something that was touched on but not really discussed in the most recent episode of The Conversation podcast (the 23.5 and only boo! episode here). In both 23.5 and Only Boo!, the show faked out a homophobic parent and then treated their kids like they were silly to assume the worst, and I hated that.
Both Ongsa and Kang had internalized homophobia in their respective series. Both were terrified of telling their mothers about their homosexual love interest. And in both cases, their mothers told them something along the lines of 'of course I will support you no matter what'. In Ongsa's case, even though she was outed by Sun without her consent, she's the one who ends up apologizing for her hesitancy and feeling foolish for her concern. In Kang's case, the show never challenges his mother's assertion that she'll always support him even though we know she hasn’t (she was the one who wanted to prevent him from studying art before his father died), and it’s the audience that was left feeling foolish for our concern. 
In the GMMTV round table for Pride Month, it was mentioned that the decision for Ongsa's mother to be accepting of her relationship with Sun was made in order to model good parental behaviour for the older generation in the audience. In the novel, Ongsa's mother presents a significant conflict, but this conflict was erased from the show. I don't know if the same decision was made in Only Boo! for the same reason or not, but either way, the show definitely signalled to Kang's mother having an issue with Kang's relationship with Moo, and then said "sike", which I did not enjoy. The Conversation panelists were correct in the conversation linked and transcribed above that this wasn't the most egregious misstep either show made, but it feels like a telling symptom of the larger overall narrative problems that New is also now succumbing to.
It seems as though telling stories stripped of queer conflict is being seen as progressive, and possibly also easier to sell, and this is where my anxiety lies around what this will mean for Thai QL content in future. 
For the record, I am all for creating queer content in which we envision a better world for ourselves. But when that is the goal, understanding where internalized homophobia comes from and thinking through how removing parental objection will affect the character and the story is vital to the story and characterization remaining coherent. Otherwise it just ends up feeling like the show is telling queer kids that they're paranoid, rather than rightly worried (like I wrote about in this thread on My Love Mix-Up Thailand, where the same decision was made again to fake out a homophobic subplot that was removed from the adaptation but was present in the source material).
These choices speak to adaptation choices with an eye for specific moments and story points, rather than to a narrative or character arc, which is where it feels like they fall into the wider pattern of what @bengiyo, @shortpplfedup and @ginnymoonbeam were describing in their discussion: shows caring more about hitting specific meme-able story points listed out on a whiteboard than about making cohesive sense or having something coherent to say. 
[So as not to leave it out: I don’t think there were concerns of homophobia in the Wandee Goodday novel (novel readers feel free to correct me if I’m wrong about this) but the show faked us out about homophobia concerns anyway, which again really bothered me during that watch and which adds to the pattern.] 
Now, of course, as I stated up at the top there is value in the creation of different kinds of media. These shows sell different fantasies than the ones I want to see, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have value.All of BL has some amount of fantasy that it’s buying into, that’s what comes with the territory of ‘fiction’. The BL bubble (in which homophobia doesn’t exist and all men are gay for each other) is a version that is at its most extreme; nothing bad ever happens that isn’t quickly resolved within an episode, so there is never narrative tension, and nobody really needs to be that concerned about how anything will go ever. I do not find these relaxing because I can’t buy into the fantasy they’re selling; for me, the lack of narrative tension is so unbelievable as to ruin my immersion. But I can see why that would be appealing for someone whose brain is not always on alert and running at 11/10! The problem I am anticipating is when the majority of content is made that way, and when it is done in a way that takes up all of the mainstream space. I think it’s notable that the only show that’s really felt not in the queer bubble from GMMTV in 2024 is Cooking Crush, which was done by a subsidiary team within GMMTV (and the same team went on to make Only Boo!). And this is why We Are caught my attention and made me nervous; When a director who is known for his representation of poignant queer angst makes an entire 16-hour series in which there are no significant conflicts at all and the only hint of homophobia is in Toey’s reference to being bullied prior to the timeframe of the series, I get worried about who is going to be making the queer angst shows in future!  
For the record, my personal preference for comfort shows are the shows that do not pretend the world is perfect, but do depict an idealized subset of that world→where there’s a group of people that support one another through the bullshit of others and the less than perfect world that surrounds them. Shows that teach us to be kind to one another, and ourselves. Shows that say the world is going to suck sometimes, but we can be good to one another, and not lose sight of who we are, and make space for others to be themselves. A few of my favourite Thai series that do this would be: 
Bad Buddy
Cooking Crush
City of Stars
Knock Knock Boys
Miracle of Teddy Bear
My Only 12%
Secret Crush on You
To Sir With Love
Until We Meet Again
(and of course these occur in non-Thai shows as well. A few examples of my favourites: What Did You Eat Yesterday, DNA Says Love You, Light on Me, Oppan, Marahuyo Project, TsukuTabe, Tadaima Okaeri, Koisenu Futari, Joshi-teki Seikatsu, Gameboys, Hehe and He, Twilight out of Focus, She Makes My Heart Flutter)
These are shows in which there are explicitly external judgments on the relationships in the show and/or the characters for things intrinsic to who they are, and the characters build a support structure in which folks are encouraged to be themselves within that ‘bubble’ (Bad Buddy walks a fine line because it’s within the BL bubble but the problems that the main couple face are so a direct allegory that everything feels familiar; this is also the case with Tadaima Okaeri, which is both omegaverse and one of the most beautifully kind shows of all time). 
So for now, I still have the other smaller Thai studios including Kongthup Productions (who made Knock Knock Boys; we’ll see whether their latest series Monster Next Door deals with any queer angst or not), idolFactory (just finished My Marvellous Dream is You, which had a ton of queer angst, and is currently doing The Loyal Pin, which I have hope for on this front), DeeHup (currently making I Saw You In My Dream, which I’m holding out hope for) and StarHunter Entertainment (who made City of Stars, but whose record is a little spotty on this front; Their latest, Sunset Vibes, has not done a great job of handling the theme of office relationships and blackmail so far, and feels very much in the bubble) to look forward to. 
But as you can see even just by virtue of the caveats I included above, it feels like this shift is happening in the smaller companies too (harder to see a real pattern with fewer data points, which is one of the reasons why I picked on GMMTV–in addition to it being the largest media conglomerate in Thailand and therefore able to take it). Maybe it’s nothing, maybe I’m just an anxious person. Or maybe I’m just wrong about what would be best for the genre and for queer people in Thailand as well as viewers all over the world. But I, for one, would find it a loss if Thai QL decides en masse to pivot away from queer angst, and right now it kind of feels like that’s what it’s doing. In this context, to reiterate my original point, the existence of We Are is not a problem, but is one in a set of exemplars that raised specific alarm bells due to the people involved and their history in QL and queer representation, its deviation from the source material, and the surrounding shows that seem to indicate a pattern rather than a one-off. 
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lovelyjuju · 1 month ago
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𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐤 – 𝐛𝐲𝐮𝐧 𝐞𝐮𝐢𝐣𝐨𝐨
euijoo x fem!reader
genre: love at first sight – college au!, fluff
warnings: a little angst here and there, curse words, alcohol consumption, euijoo is literally just so in love it hurts
word count: 6.5k
•☽────✧˖°˖☆˖°˖✧────☾•
euijoo was never the type to receive a lot of attention from others. he wasn't disliked,he just went unnoticed – overlooked, despite his height. but he didn't mind. he liked it that way; being in his own little bubble that consisted of classes, late night study sessions, his favourite books, and weekends spent gaming with his best friend nicholas. it was peaceful like that and he wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
until he met you.
euijoo was weaving through the crowded college hallways, lost in thought about the upcoming exam period, and mentally organizing how to spread out all the study materials over the next two weeks, when a bright, unfamiliar laugh pierced through the haze of his thoughts.
almost instantly, his eyes found the source of the sound – and he swore he could feel his heart sink. for a moment, he stood frozen, completely taken aback. it wasn’t just your appearance that left him breathless, but something more – a kind of effortless energy that seemed to fill the space around you. he couldn’t believe he had never noticed you before. had you always been there, just beyond the edge of his awareness, waiting to catch him off guard?
the easygoing, yet warm smile you wore, made his heart flutter in a way he'd never experienced before – it captivated him, leaving his eyes fixed on you, unable to look away.
it wasn’t until a dull ache in his shoulder brought him back to reality that he finally gathered his thoughts. "how about not standing in the middle of the hallway," he heard an irritated student mutter as they brushed past him. euijoo quickly stepped aside, clearing his throat before mumbling a half-hearted apology.
when he looked back at you, you were gone, the spot that had held your presence just moments ago now empty, yet somehow, your warmth still seemed to linger in the air. he shook his head as if it could clear his mind that suddenly seemed to only have space for you – exams long forgotten.
as he continued his way to the cafeteria, he tried his best to quiet his thoughts, but to no avail. it was almost ridiculous, he thought, how just twenty seconds of seeing you could completely take over his mind. hell, he didn't even know your name, and until two minutes ago, he hadn’t known you existed at all.
he tightened his grip on the straps of his backpack and exhaled deeply before stepping into the cafeteria, scanning the room for nicholas, determined not to let anything show.
"juju! everything okay?" nicholas greeted him once the younger found him sitting at a table.
"yes," he replied, almost a little too quickly. "why wouldn't everything be okay?"
nicholas furrowed his brows, leaning back in his chair a bit, and scanned his best friend's face carefully. "you know," he started, "i usually ask. but honestly, today you're being weird about it." nicholas crossed his arms in front of his chest. "so, what's up?"
euijoo quickly looked down, knowing damn well he couldn’t lie to nicholas face-to-face, and silently cursed himself for trying too hard to hide how he really felt. he'd always been too awkward when trying to play it cool, and nicholas was too much of a good friend to not notice.
"nothing," he mumbled after a while, "i'm just stressing over exams, i guess."
nicholas sighed slightly. "you know you'll ace it, you always do. why do you have to panic first?"
euijoo just offered a slight shrug as he picked up his chopsticks to eat his lunch, attempting to focus on nicholas’s ramble about finding healthy ways to relieve stress – attempting not to let his thoughts drift back to you once again.
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
even days later, euijoo couldn’t shake the moment from his mind. your laughter, your presence – it all replayed in his head, tugging at him in a way that was unfamiliar, unsettling. he found himself scanning the hallways more often, hoping to catch even a glimpse of you. but whenever he did spot you, his heart would pound in his chest, his feet frozen, leaving him unable to approach. instead, he’d linger from a distance, admiring in silence, and hoping you wouldn’t notice.
nicholas was quick to catch on. the two were sitting on the lawn near campus after some hours of studying together in the library. it was evident that both were a little exhausted, but euijoo seemed quieter than usual, distracted.
"you’ve been acting weird lately," nicholas said after some moments of silence, a hint of concern coating his words. "what's going on? is it really just exams?"
euijoo tried to brush it off, shaking his head. "it's nothing, just a lot on my mind."
nicholas raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. just as he was about to respond, he noticed euijoo's eyes slightly widen at something. he followed his friend's gaze, realizing that it wasn’t something after all, but rather someone. euijoo wondered how you always somehow managed to be exactly where he was. so close, yet just so out of reach. he found himself watching you a moment longer than he intended, and nicholas, ever the attentive friend, understood immediately.
"a lot on your mind, huh? or someone on your mind? spill, who is she?"
after a long pause, euijoo sighed. "just–... actually, i don't know." he felt a heat rise to his cheeks just saying it.
nicholas's eyes lit up at euijoo's blushed cheeks, a grin spreading across his face. "you don't know? let me guess, you’ve never talked to her?"
euijoo frowned. "it’s not that easy. i don’t even know where to start. 'hi, i've been secretly watching you for a while now cause you're the prettiest girl i've ever seen?' will surely go well," he said sarcastically.
"it’s not rocket science," nicholas said with a laugh. "you don’t have to confess that you’re hopelessly in love with someone you barely know, juju. you just go up and say hi. you do know how to say hi, right?"
euijoo groaned, sinking deeper into the lawn. "i’m not like you, nicholas. i don’t know how to just... talk to people like that."
nicholas leaned in, a mischievous glint in his eye. "then we’re gonna fix that."
over the next few days, nicholas kept pushing him. whenever they passed you in the hallway, nicholas would nudge euijoo's shoulder and whisper, "now’s your chance," but every time, euijoo’s nerves would get the best of him. his heart would race, his hands would get all sweaty, and the words he wanted to say would evaporate before he could speak.
it became a routine – nicholas encouraging, euijoo hesitating. no matter how much he wanted to approach you, the thought of saying something and making a fool of himself kept holding him back.
nicholas, ever persistent, wouldn’t let up. "look, euijoo," he said one afternoon, pulling him aside after class, "if you don’t do something soon, someone else will. you don’t want to regret not taking your shot, do you?"
euijoo knew nicholas was right, but every time he tried to gather the courage, he felt like he was standing at the edge of a cliff, too afraid to jump.
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
one afternoon, in the final week of lectures before exam season would hit with full force, euijoo found himself sitting in the cafeteria, eating his lunch with nicholas while grumbling about the little time they had between lectures and exams, which left them hardly any opportunity to study in peace.
"euijoo," nicholas interrupted his best friend's rant, when he spotted you at a table. usually, you'd sit with your friends, but this time, you were all by yourself. he titled his head in your direction, instructing euijoo to look your way.
"she's alone, that's your chance," he encouraged him yet another time to approach you. the younger opened his mouth to object, but nothing came out – you weren't surrounded by your friends, you weren't rushing to your next class; he didn't have any excuses this time.
"what's the worst that can happen?" nicholas pressed.
the worst that can happen? him making a total fool of himself? you rejecting him? maybe even making fun of him? or worse, ignoring him?
despite the doubts swirling in his mind, he pushed his chair back, stood up on slightly wobbly knees, and walking over to your table. he didn't understand where his confidence came from, but as quickly as it did, it fled his body again, when someone else approached you first.
he stopped dead in his tracks, watching as kei, known as one of the best athletes on the college's team, sat down next to you, greeted you with a gentle kiss on your cheek, and wrapped his arm around your waist to pull you just a little closer.
euijoo's heart dropped. he felt stupid. so, so stupid. of course you had a boyfriend. why would a girl like you not have a boyfriend?
he turned around, hoping that the way he had stood there, as usual, just went unnoticed by everyone. he slowly went back to the table he shared with nicholas and sank down in his chair, shoulders slumped and eyes stuck to his still half-full plate.
a hint of worry washed over nicholas's face as he saw euijoo's expression. he intentionally hadn’t observed the approach, wanting to spare euijoo from feeling scrutinized, but now he couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt for not knowing if he could have jumped in to help. "what happened?" he asked softly, not sure if he'd even get a reply.
euijoo just shook his head, not lifting his gaze. "nothing. she's with kei," he replied silently.
nicholas slightly bit his bottom lip, watching as his best friend picked up his chopsticks again to pick at his food. "shit... i'm sorry, i had no idea," he mumbled, although knowing it wouldn't help anyhow.
again, euijoo shook his head slightly. "it's fine. it was delusional to think she'd be single anyways."
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
for the first time since he'd started college, euijoo felt genuinely thankful for the stress that came with exam season. he'd get to spend his time studying, sometimes until late at night, and whenever he finally closed his books, he was too exhausted to think about how he felt.
although nicholas tried his best to convince euijoo to take more breaks, the younger thrived on the distraction that studying brought about. it was a little ridiculous anyway, he tried to convince himself. he couldn't seriously be upset that his hallway crush had a boyfriend. after all, he didn't even know you, and now he was sure it would stay that way. so why be upset about it?
still, euijoo was happy when the last exam was done, a wave of relief washing over him. he knew he'd head back to his home country to spend the summer break with his family, and he was certain that by the time he'd return to college, he'd be fully unbothered by you.
during the summer break, euijoo found comfort in returning home, where life felt familiar and calm. being surrounded by family and catching up with old friends brought a sense of ease, and he could finally relax and clear his head.
each day that passed, the thought of you slipped further from his mind. it felt ridiculous, really – how a brief, one-sided crush had thrown him off so much. by the time summer neared its end, euijoo felt lighter. the idea of going back to campus no longer felt stressful.
he’d be fine; that's what he told himself. if he saw you again, so be it. but this time, he'd be walking back onto campus in control of his emotions.
his resolve lasted exactly one day.
he had almost made it throughout the first day of classes without running into you. one last class and he'd head to finally meet up with nicholas to catch up about the summer.
he found a spot near the middle of the room and settled in, pulling out his notebook and glancing around casually as the rest of the students trickled in. just as he was about to pull out his phone, the door opened again, and a familiar laugh echoed through the room.
his heart stopped for a moment, his hand freezing halfway to his pocket.
he didn’t even have to look to know it was you. that laugh – it was the same one that had derailed his focus for weeks last semester. and against his better judgment, he glanced up. there you were, walking in with a friend, that warm energy surrounding you like a halo. euijoo’s breath caught in his throat. you hadn’t noticed him, but he sure as hell noticed you. all the progress he thought he’d made over the summer crumbled in an instant.
he quickly looked down at his notebook, gripping his pen tighter than necessary, mentally scolding himself for how easily his resolve had vanished. stay calm, he told himself. it’s just one class. you’ll survive.
the professor began speaking, announcing the outline for the semester and the project that would take up the majority of their time, continuing with a speech on the importance of teamwork, but euijoo barely listened. had you gotten more beautiful over summer? was that even possible?
"i don't want any bickering on who's working with who, so i'll call out pairs. i expect everyone to work together efficiently," the professor continued, "raise your hand when your name is called so your partner can find you."
euijoo zoned out, still trying to push you from his mind, repeating a mantra to himself that everything was fine, that this would all blow over soon.
"byun euijoo and–" the professor called out, snapping him back to attention, "– y/l/n y/n."
euijoo scanned the room while hesitantly raising his hand.
his heart dropped. he could almost feel the air leave the room.
you had raised your hand. for a second, you seemed to look around, processing the pairing before your gaze settled on him.
slowly, as if in a daze, he looked up, meeting your eyes for the first time. it felt like time had slowed down, like every sound in the lecture hall faded away except for the quiet hum of his own heartbeat in his ears. he could feel the heat rushing to his face, his head starting to spin, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away.
you smiled – a soft, polite smile, the kind you give someone you don’t really know but are about to work with for an entire semester. it wasn't much, but oh god, euijoo swore the world stopped for a second.
when you turned back toward the front of the class, he didn't even know if he'd returned the smile, if he'd nodded in acknowledgement, or if he'd done absolutely nothing.
throughout the entire class, it became increasingly obvious for euijoo that the weeks of distance had done nothing to change the way he felt about you. he found himself zoning out, replaying the tiny interaction between you again and again, or looking back to your seat for just a second before he forced himself to look away.
as the professor ended class, he started packing up his things, and took a deep breath. he knew he'd had to talk to you now. and although techincally, he had prepared for that moment so long during the last semester, he felt himself hesitating yet again.
he tried to remind himself that it was just for the project and that there was no way he could ridicule himself now.
euijoo took a deep breath, trying to steady himself as the class began to filter out. his palms felt sweaty, and his heart raced faster with every step that brought him closer to where you were gathering your things. his mind raced with a thousand ways to approach the conversation, yet none of them seemed right.
as if sensing his approach, you glanced up from your bag, your eyes meeting his for the second time that day. that soft smile appeared again – this time with a hint of curiosity, and euijoo nearly forgot what he had planned to say. for a moment, the world felt too quiet, his nerves too loud.
"hi, euijoo, right?" you said, breaking the silence with an easy warmth. your voice was gentle, and somehow it felt like a small bit of relief to hear his name spoken so softly.
euijoo swallowed hard, blinking as if snapping out of a daze. "uh, yeah. that’s me." he managed a small, awkward laugh. "looks like we’re project partners."
you nodded, still smiling as you stood up. "looks like it. should we maybe set up a time to meet and figure out a plan?"
it was such a simple question, and yet euijoo’s heart felt like it was racing a marathon. he quickly nodded, trying not to let his nerves show. "yeah, sure. uh... maybe at the library? it’s usually quieter there." he didn't know how the hell he'd managed to sound so calm, but he felt a short pang of pride rush through him.
"perfect," you said, slinging your bag over your shoulder. "how about tomorrow afternoon?"
"tomorrow sounds good," euijoo replied, his mind scrambling for something else to say – something that wasn’t awkward or strange. his fingers fidgeted with the straps of his own backpack as he added, "uh, we can exchange numbers too? you know, to coordinate."
you smiled again, and euijoo could almost feel the tension melting away, though his pulse was still thrumming in his ears. "sure yes. just type in your number."
you handed him your phone, almost brushing his fingers with yours in the process, and he just hoped you didn't hear how his breath hitched. he quickly typed his number in and handed it back to you with a sheepish grin. "there you go."
"great! i’ll text you so we can figure out the details. see you tomorrow, euijoo."
with one last smile, you turned and headed toward the door, leaving euijoo standing there, his mind still trying to process the fact that not only had you smiled at him – twice – but now you had his number. sure, it was only for a project, and his chest still felt tight, his knees were still slightly shaky, but a strange sense of accomplishment settled over him.
"what took you so long?" nicholas frowned at his best friend as he finally approached their usual spot at the lawn.
euijoo plopped himself down next to him, hoping that the blush on his cheeks had faded by now, but nicholas was already eyeing him suspiciously.
“uh… nothing,” euijoo said, scratching the back of his neck. but the smile that kept creeping onto his face as his mind went back to the reason of his delay gave him away completely.
nicholas narrowed his eyes. “that is not a ‘nothing’ face. what happened?”
euijoo let out a long sigh, leaning back on his hands. “you remember that girl… the one from last semester?” he started, feeling his face flush slightly as he spoke.
"the one you swore you were over?" nicholas chimed in, an amused tone lacing his voice and a smirk tugging at his lips.
euijoo sighed, scratching the back of his neck. “i never swore anything,” he mumbled.
nicholas’s smirk only widened. “right. so what happened? did you see her?”
euijoo took a deep breath, feeling almost embarrassed at how easily he’d been caught. “she’s… in my class."
nicholas’s eyes lit up. “wait, her? she’s in your class?”
the younger nodded, his voice a little quieter now. “actually... we’re partnered up for the semester project.”
nicholas’s jaw dropped in exaggerated surprise, his smirk growing into a full grin. “no way. the girl you were practically obsessed with is now your project partner?”
“obsessed is a strong word,” euijoo protested, though he couldn’t deny that it wasn’t too far from the truth.
the older leaned in, eyes gleaming with mischief. "you do realize that this is the chance you've been waiting for, right?"
euijoo groaned, although he'd lie if he said he didn't allow himself to entertain that thought for a second. "it's not a chance, nico. she's taken, remember? i'm not going to try anything."
nicholas raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. "you cannot know that. maybe they broke up," he said, to which euijoo just shot him a pointed look that told him this was the end of their conversation.
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
in the following weeks, you and euijoo met regularly to work on the project. though the workload was tiring, the way your minds seemed to complement each other perfectly made the process surprisingly smooth. it seemed like you could finish all of his thoughts when he struggled, and he had all the answers to your questions.
it should have been a relief for euijoo, knowing the project wasn't going to be impossible to handle, but instead, it only made things more complicated for him. your sharp insights and ideas left him even more captivated, as he realized that beyond your pretty face that still left him breathless, and the energy you carried, you were also incredibly smart. it felt almost too much to handle.
during the time you spent together, he couldn't help but notice little things about you that he hadn't seen from the distance. like the way your brows furrowed slightly when you were concentrated, or the way you tapped your pen on your chin when you were thinking. all of these things, no matter how simple or seemingly meaningless, somehow only carved the place he had reserved for you in his heart a little deeper. it felt like every new thing he learned about you warmed his chest more.
he'd catch himself smiling whenever he'd watch you just a little too long while you were busy typing on your laptop, and he got used to quickly looking down or pretending to search something in his backpack every time he felt the all too familiar heat rushing to his cheeks.
it was a miracle, really, how you hadn't caught on yet. at least that's what nicholas said – that everyone could clearly see the way euijoo was so obviously, helplessly in love.
"you got it bad, huh?" he had asked one time he met euijoo after your scheduled study session at the library. but the younger had just quickly shrugged it off with a mumbled, "shut up."
of course, working with you didn't only bring warmth and nervouseness that had by now grown to feel almost comfortable. it also brought hard, almost cruel, reminders of the one-sidedness of his feelings. of how you weren't his.
there was that pretty necklace you wore – one with a small gem – that he was certain kei had gifted to you. it hung around your neck like a constant reminder that you belonged to someone else.
there was kei who'd come to pick you up from the library when you finished whatever you had planned for that day, so you wouldn't have to go home alone. euijoo was glad to know there was someone who made sure you got home safely, but hell, he would be that someone too.
every time he saw you smiling at your boyfriend's arrival, the brightness in your eyes sent a flutter through euijoo's heart, only to be swiftly replaced by the reminder of how happy you were with him. it felt like a punch to the gut, and he’d quickly look away, embarrassed by the way his heart ached.
the confidence kei radiated made euijoo feel almost small. kei seemed to be everything he was not, and even the thought of ever standing a chance felt ridiculous.
sometimes, while working on the project, you would receive a text from your boyfriend, and euijoo couldn’t help but glance at your phone. he’d see the photo of the two of you together as your lock screen, and it would make his chest tighten uncomfortably.
whenever you’d smile at your phone while typing a quick reply, it was like a dagger in his heart; you were so genuinely happy, and he felt foolish for still liking you when he knew damn well that you were taken. he felt stupid for even letting himself dream about what it would be like to be the one making you smile like that.
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
one afternoon when euijoo arrived to the library, he found you at your usual spot, already immersed in the book in front of you and taking notes here and there. he pulled out his phone, slight panic washing over him. was he late? no. 4:30pm – he wasn't late.
"hey," he greeted gently after approaching the table, careful to not startle you. you looked up from the book and your eyes met his for a second. he didn't know how many times you had held eye-contact with him already, but it still made his knees wobble like it was the first.
"hey," you greeted back with a soft smile, and he swore his heart skipped a beat or two.
"i'm not late, am i?" euijoo asked after sitting down across from you, taking out his supplies but never leaving your gaze.
"no, no, don't worry," you shook your head, "i just uh... had nothing to do, so i figured i could start already. here look," you handed him your paper of notes and, yet again, reading your ideas and understandings of the text almost stunned him.
you continued working together until you reached the goal you had set for the day. when euijoo packed up his things, he tried to mentally prepare himself to see kei, his stomach filling with nervous premonition. but he didn't catch any sight of him.
he watched as you finished packing your bag, and he swore your eyes scanned the library too – just for a second, before you quickly glanced down to your phone, biting your bottom lip just the tiniest bit.
"isn't uh... isn't kei coming?" euijoo asked, his tone careful, almost shy.
he saw a hint of something flash through your eyes – something he couldn't quite name, but it vanished as quickly as it came. you shook your head. "i'm going alone today," you responded, offering a slight smile.
euijoo couldn't help but feel that something was up. he would have loved to be there to listen if his intuition was right, but he knew he wasn't in the position to ask.
"i can walk you home," he blurted out the offer before his brain could even finish processing the thought. he mentally cursed himself, when he saw your slight smile. it looked different from your usual bright, friendly smiles – it looked more forced, not really reaching your eyes.
"sorry, that was a stupid idea," he added, his voice a little quieter now. his mind started racing. had he made you uncomfortable? was it weird for him to suggest keeping you company outside of the project?
"it wasn't," you replied equally quiet, yet you cut through the thoughts that had started clouding his mind. "i'll be fine, but i appreciate it... thanks, euijoo." the volume of your voice decreased until all that was left was another, almost shy but this time more genuine smile from you.
euijoo lingered for a moment, his bagpack slung over his shoulder, still standing at the table as you looked back down at your phone. he gave a small nod, even though you weren't looking, and quietly left the library, his mind replaying the brief conversation over and over.
the following week, you canceled the study session last minute. it was the first time you had done so, and euijoo felt an odd twinge of concern. he didn't pry, didn't want to dig deeper, but he couldn't shake the feeling that something wasn't quite right.
when you rescheduled for the week after, euijoo's intuition only grew stronger; he could clearly sense something was off. you seemed quieter, more in thought than usual. during the session, your eyes occasionally drifted away from the book, your notes, and even from him, as if you were miles away.
it wasn’t until euijoo noticed the absence of your necklace that a deeper worry settled into him. you had absentmindedly reached for it, your fingers grazing your collarbone, but when they found nothing, you quickly pulled your hand away.
“hey,” he asked softly, “is everything okay?”
your eyes met his, surprised by his question, but you gave a small shrug, your lips pressing into a thin line. "yeah, it's fine."
euijoo knew better than that by now, and he wanted to help, but he also didn’t want to push too hard. he hesitated for a moment before softly offering, “you know... if you ever want to talk... i’m here.”
you gave him a longer look this time, something unreadable in your eyes. and then, after a brief pause, you exhaled, leaning back in your chair. “i broke up with kei.”
euijoo felt his breath catch in his throat. what? he hadn't expected you to tell him. not so quickly, and not this. the name hit the air between you both, hanging there for a moment.
"i... i'm sorry," was all he managed to say. he wasn't sure how to choose his words, but he wanted to comfort you. "that... must be hard."
you nodded slightly, looking down at your hands, your voice soft. "it’s been coming for a while, i guess. he’s been distant, and i should’ve known, but... yeah." euijoo could feel his heart crack at the hint of sadness in your voice.
he felt the urge to reach across the table, maybe take your hand or offer some kind of physical comfort, but he stopped himself. he knew the boundaries well, and he didn't want to overstep. instead, he gave you a warm smile, hoping that would soothe your pain – that it would somehow be enough.
“thanks for telling me,” he said gently. he wanted to say more, to be a better source of comfort. but he sensed that he shouldn't press further, that you didn't want to talk about it now. "if you need anything… i’m here.”
you didn’t say anything for a moment, but then you gave a small, genuine smile – one that felt more like you. "thanks, euijoo."
in the following weeks, the two of you returned to your routine of project work. you both focused on your work, talking when necessary but mostly just working comfortably in each other’s presence.
euijoo began bringing you your usual coffee, not making a big deal out of it, just setting it down next to your books with a small remark like, "i thought that might help to cheer you up a little."
and while you thanked him casually each time, those gestures began to tug at something inside you. you found yourself looking forward to seeing him, not because of the free coffee but because of him – the way he always seemed to know when you needed a break, the quiet understanding he brought with him. his presence felt like a comforting anchor in the storm that had been your breakup.
one time, you looked up to thank him, your eyes meeting his, and for a second, you held the gaze. for the first time, you noticed how his brown hair fell slightly over his eyes, how his smile reached them in a way that felt warm, inviting. your heart gave a tiny flutter that you immediately brushed off. euijoo sat down, pulling out his notebook, but you could feel his presence in a way that felt more heightened than usual.
as time passed, you started seeing things you'd never noticed before, like the way his eyes lit up when he was explaining something he seemed passionate about, or the way he'd always look down for a second when he smiled shyly. you tried to focus on the project, but your mind wandered – drifting back to the small moments where you found yourself lingering on him. you began to notice how his kindness, patience, and quiet support filled you with a gentle warmth that spread through you in a comforting way.
yet, each time you felt that warmth in your chest, you quickly dismissed it. it was too soon. you had just started getting over kei; the last thing you needed was to rush into something else.
but euijoo made it so easy. you were falling for him, you knew it. and he made that fall feel so effortless, almost natural – filled with a mixture of comfort and anticipation.
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
"please, euijoo," you begged, pouting your lips slightly, hoping that this would help you succeed in your attempt to persuade euijoo to join a party that a fellow student hosted to celebrate the end of the semester.
he opened his mouth to object, but, oh god, you were just too adorable to resist. he actually felt like he'd combust if you didn't stop pouting anytime soon, so he gave in. "fine, but only for two hours."
you smiled brightly, still catching euijoo off guard like the very first time he saw you smile. oh how he wished he could tell you just how much that smile meant to him.
throughout the second half of the semester, you two had somehow bonded, feeling a little less awkward and a little more comfortable around each other – conversations flowing with ease, even for euijoo. but despite nicholas's (unsuccessful) attempts to encourage euijoo to finally tell you about his feelings, the latter didn't want to ruin the comfort you had just found in each other. if that was the closest he could get to you, then he'd settle for that.
when you arrived to the party hours later that day, people were already gathering in the small place, chatting and drinking, and some even danced. you felt embraced by the warmth of euijoo's body next to you, although the two of you didn't touch. but it felt comfortable, somewhat safe.
you grabbed some drinks from the kitchen before pushing through the growing crowd of people, euijoo's hand softly staying on the small of your back as if to not lose you. your skin buzzed in the spot where his hand rested, but you tried to shrug the feeling off.
you spent your evening reminiscing about the past semester, laughing here and there at funny stories either of you had to tell.
as the evening wore on, the party around you grew louder, drawing you a little closer to each other, leaning in a bit more whenever the other said something. you hadn’t touched since euijoo’s hand had briefly rested on your back earlier, but you could still feel the ghost of it. now, so close to him, the thought kept drifting to the back of your mind, no matter how much you tried to focus on the conversation.
when you couldn't hear each other anymore, not even after leaning in unnervingly close, you exchanged a look, a silent understanding passing between you. without a word, you both quietly slipped out to the balcony.
the sudden quiet was soothing. you both leaned against the railing, the city lights glowing softly below, the distant sounds of the streets below grounding the moment.
neither of you spoke for a while, but the silence wasn’t uncomfortable. it felt more like a necessary pause. you could feel the weight of euijoo’s presence next to you, close enough that his arm almost brushed yours, but not quite.
after a few more beats of silence, euijoo shifted slightly, his hand brushing against the railing, fingers curling around it before he turned to you. his eyes found yours, and he didn't know if that was what pushed him, or if it was the alcohol in his blood that made his head buzz softly.
“you know,” he started, “i’ve been meaning to tell you something.”
you blinked, the soft buzz in your own head making his words seem like they were suspended in the air, slow to sink in. “yeah?” you asked, feeling your heart pick up pace. now or never, your intoxicated mind told yourself, "me too."
euijoo blinked, a bit taken aback, and the confidence he had brought up from god knows where suddenly vanished. he swallowed, tightening his grip about the railing. "what is it?" he asked quietly, too scared to say what had been on his mind now that he didn't know what was on yours.
you slightly shook your head. "no, you go first."
he hesitated, the silence stretching between you to a point it started to feel almost unbearable. he wouldn't go first, you thought, so you opened your mouth to beat him to it. but just when you uttered those three words, he did the same.
"i like you," you both said in unison, the words hanging in the air between you, leaving an almost tangible shock in their wake.
for a split second, you both froze, wide-eyed. then, simultaneously:
"what?"
again, the word echoed in both of your voices. you could feel your cheeks warming, and before you could help it, a small, nervous laugh escaped you.
euijoo blinked, stunned for a heartbeat, before the tension broke and he chuckled too, his laughter soft but genuine. the sound of it sent a wave of warmth through you, easing the fluttering in your chest.
"i–" he started, still smiling but a little more serious now. he took a breath, steadying himself, before his eyes found yours again. "i've been wanting to say that for a while. longer than i probably should have."
his confession was soft, but it felt heavy with sincerity. his eyes searched yours for a reaction, and you felt your heart flutter again.
you smiled, taking a step closer, feeling that familiar comfort in his presence. “i realized it recently,” you admitted quietly, “but… i can’t deny it anymore, either. being with you, it’s just… it feels... good."
euijoo’s gaze softened, and you could see the relief wash over his face, like the tension he’d been carrying for so long had finally lifted.
the space between you felt smaller now, filled with the weight of what had just been said.
for a moment, neither of you spoke. you just stood there, the city lights twinkling below. and then, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, euijoo took a small step forward, his hand reaching up gently, hesitantly, to brush a strand of hair away from your face.
your breath hitched as his hand lingered near your cheek, his touch light and careful, like he was waiting for permission. and with a small nod, you allowed him to close the distance that had always been between you – to finally kiss the lips that, with that laugh long ago, had captured him completely. <3
© lovelyjuju (2024)
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peppermintquartz · 5 months ago
Text
from a post by @parrishjeanna
--
I shouldn't have left Evan on the curb. Tommy kicks himself mentally when he gets home, and slumps into his armchair. But it stung when Evan told Eddie that they were going to look for "hot chicks". Stung in a way that Tommy didn't expect it to. It's not as if he expected Evan to declare out loud and proud that he's into dudes now, it's just that Evan panicked so fast in the presence of his best friend, and Tommy doesn't want to make him feel bad about any of this. He doesn't want to be shoved back in the closet either. It's taken him a lot of work to be comfortable with being gay, and Evan hasn't gone through all that yet.
He sighs again. Evan had looked so adorable, too, all flustered and blushing, too nervous to eat much but still engaged in their conversation. Tommy almost wishes he had taken that one step further, got a farewell kiss, but he would have caved to those big puppy eyes and he would have taken Evan to the movies and then there will be a more painful heartbreak for him in the future because he hadn't been firm this time. He knows this for a fact; it's not his first rodeo.
Nonetheless, there is a sense of wistful regret. He really wants to have kissed Evan a second time.
--
Evan's sitting there in the sun, glancing left and right, and Tommy's heart leaps into his mouth at how charming - yes, that's the word - the scene is. He takes a deep breath and sticks his hands in his pockets and walks closer.
He sees the exact moment Evan notices him, the way the younger man's smile widens.
"Hey," Evan says, and he's still as adorable as he was the first time Tommy saw him, when Howie led him and Eddie to the helicopter and they made hasty introductions.
"Hey," Tommy replies, and cringes inwardly at how forced-casual his tone is. It's the talk, he guesses, the one the guys give when they want to let Tommy down easy, to let him know that they were mistaken about feeling like that about him.
"Thanks for agreeing to meet me," Evan continues
"Of course."
Motioning to the coffee he ordered for Tommy, Evan smiles and says, (rambles, really) "I didn't know how you take it, so I, uh, just took a guess."
Tommy tries it. He debates for a second if he should lie, but puts that thought away. Better to be honest. "Mm. So, not like that."
"Seems like there's a lot we don't know about each other," Evan chuckles and Tommy's heart skips again. God, Evan is so good-looking, especially when his smile lights up his whole face like that, and Tommy braces himself for the letdown.
He meets Evan's eyes. "Practically everything."
"Well," says Evan, and Tommy steels his heart, and Evan continues, "I would like to change that."
What? Tommy suddenly is unable to breathe. He listens to Evan's apology, reassures him that there's nothing to apologize for (this part he has done three times in the past four years, and he means it - he doesn't want to force people out of the closet if they didn't want to be out), explains his reasoning.
Evan smiles wryly. "Still. The way I-I reacted was... not my proudest moment."
This part's new. Tommy nodded. "Noted."
"So you said before, um, th-that you don't think I'm ready."
Oh. Here it is. Tommy keeps his hands under the table, his fingers linked tightly. He's gonna say that he thinks I'm right. That he really isn't ready.
"And the truth is, I don't know what I'm ready for," Evan says, and it is unfair how sincere he looks in that moment, because all Tommy wants is to lean over and kiss the uncertainty out of him, and he can't do that. Not if Evan wants to just be friends. Oblivious to Tommy's internal struggle, Evan continues, "...but I am ready for something. And I think that something... could be with you."
Tommy's fingers clench together. His heart forgets how to beat. He forgets how to breathe. He takes a moment. He can't hide his smile.
"You already know that I'm interested," he manages to say, hoping it comes across clearly enough that it's not merely interest but also desire, yet afraid to be too blatant about what he really wants out of this.
Evan grins and breaks through all of Tommy's defenses. "Come with me to my sister's wedding."
"What?!" Tommy doesn't even know his voice can go that high-pitched, but the sheer enormity of what Evan is offering, just days after that date...
"I want you," Evan repeats, "to be my date for my sister's wedding."
"Evan." It's an Are you sure? and it's not just about the date, it's not just about being his date for his sister's wedding, it's about everyone knowing, and Evan has to understand, he must understand what a huge step it is...
Evan doesn't even hesitate. Tommy's still processing the invitation and finally hears Evan say, "...already know half the people there, and she wants to meet you."
His sister knows about me. He's told her about me. Tommy's never been thrown into the deep end like this. He can't remember being anyone's date to a wedding, let alone a family member's wedding, where his colleagues will also be present. Everyone in Evan's life that matters to him will know.
"Are you... absolutely sure about this?" Tommy asks, needing to confirm this.
Evan's smile is brighter than the sun. "Yes, I'm sure. There's gonna be free food, and I need someone to dance with."
How can anyone say no to that? As Tommy accepts the date, he feels a lot lighter and freer than he has done for a long, long time. This feels right, he thinks, gently squeezing Evan's hand tucked between his own. Let this be right for us both.
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lincolndjarin · 10 months ago
Text
my way.
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pairing : oberyn martell x f!reader
summary : being the prince of dorne can often be a rather stressful job, it's hard to give, and give, and give. sometimes you just need to be on the receiving end for a little while.
warnings, tags, etc : five seconds of plot to build up to a whole lot of porn, pegging (obvi), medieval strap on, glass toys, fingering, oberyn sucks the strap, allusions to other partners, referring to a dildo as a cock, multiple orgasms, overstimulation if you squint, premature ejaculation?? idk he cums fast bc i'm a sucker for that, cum play, reader has brief penis envy idk if that's the term but yeah, spit as lube bc its the olden days or whatever, anal sex, soft & loving sex, sort of a gentle dom vibe from reader, they're married <3 <3 <3, aftercare, i didn't really edit this as much as i should have (i'm sleepy) so apologies in advance
a/n : hello lovelies !!!! i am back from my little break with a little middle aged man pegging!! check out @wannab-urs who put together this entire project for a full masterlist of everyones works soon <3 apologies if i'm a little rusty i'm still getting back into my writing groove :3
dividers by @saradika-graphics
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Everything always has to be his way. 
If you didn’t love him so much it would probably irritate you more. And when it does bother you he always does his best to fix it but it doesn’t make it any less frustrating. Your sweet prince has always done right by you but he’s never done it your way, and when things don’t go exactly as he wants them to he becomes a real pain. 
You know it isn’t entirely his fault of course. The combination of never being told no and having to make decisions that affect the people of Dorne in real time, often leaves him stressed beyond comprehension. 
Today it seems to be particularly bad as he paces around your shared chambers. You had spent your day reading and baking bread, everything had been perfectly fine until he burst through the door, rambling about a funding dispute he’s been having with his brother for weeks now. You can tell by the glint in his eye that things clearly aren’t going his way, before you get a chance to comfort him he snaps at you. 
“Stop looking at me like that.” It’s a small critique, you have been staring at him waiting for this sort of thing, so you take control of the situation rather quickly. 
“Let me give you a chance to apologize before this becomes a fight.” You cross your arms in front of your chest. He immediately picks up on the annoyance in your voice as his features soften from anger to shame. 
“I’m sorry.” He really means it as he bows his head a bit. “It’s just- It’s been a difficult day.” He makes his way over to you, taking one of your hands, kissing your knuckles. “I’m sorry, my stars.”
“I know, my moon, it’s okay.” You move the hand he holds to his lips, cradling his face briefly as he smiles, to your dismay it doesn’t reach his eyes. He’s still tense. 
“I think I’d go mad if I didn’t get to come home to you each day.” You don’t doubt that. 
“Why don’t you let me help you out a little?” You wrap your arms around him, letting your fingers tangle in the hair at the base of his neck. “Let me take care of you.” You barely speak above a whisper now as his body starts to relax in response to your touch. He walks you towards the bed until the backs of your knees hit the mattress, just as expected he immediately takes control of the situation, barely letting you get another word in as his hands slide down your waist like they’ve done countless times before except this time you catch his wrists before he can get that far. “Can you lay down for me?” The moment you ask the question he raises an eyebrow before complying, moving to sit with his back against the headboard as you go to your nightstand. 
You’ve used the toy a few times before with your other partners but as far as you know Oberyn’s never even seen it. You haven’t made any effort to hide it from him but he’s always so quick to act when it’s just the two of you, he never gives you much of a chance to do anything but take what he gives. No wonder he’s so stressed, he’s never taken a moment to just receive. 
The moment you crawl up the bed to him he’s already back on you. All teeth and hands as he pulls you against him, you have to force yourself to pull away from him though it pains you greatly. 
“Not yet- I want to try something new.” You don’t give him a chance to question as you reach across him to your nightstand. You just had a new toy made, hand blown glass, for this sort of occasion, as you toss it down next to him his eyes squint in confusion before going wide. 
“Where did you get that, my love?” His words drawl a bit, his Dornish accent hangs heavy in the air as you lift your dress over your head, tossing it aside, sitting before him completely bare as you slip into the leather straps, cinching the buckles carefully before taking the toy and holding it in one hand languidly. 
“A glass smith nearby has been more than willing to experiment with his craft for me. Is this something you’re interested in trying?” You can already tell what his answer is going to be based on his expression but you still want to hear him say it. 
“Of course, I’d try anything for you.” He purrs softly as you push him back into the pillows. You lay him back, an action he’s done to you countless times before, tugging at the cords of his robe. Between the two of you, eager to get him undressed, it only takes a moment before the fabric hits the floor. Once he’s as bare as you are you’re able to see just how much the idea thrills him as his red tipped cock slaps against his stomach. 
“Do you think you can relinquish control for just a little while, my prince?” You rake your nails against his chest lightly as he nods. “Good. I don’t want you to worry about a thing, put all your focus on taking what I give you, do you understand?” You stop your hands movement downwards right as you reach the patch of hair on his lower stomach. 
“Absolutely.” He flashes you a toothy grin and you can’t help but respond with one of your own. 
“You will do as I say then. And if I ask something of you that you do not like then you will say stop, is that clear?” You want so badly to take his cock into your hands or mouth but you’re trying to be patient as you pull your hand back. This is for his sake, not yours. 
“Perfectly clear.” His hips twitch upwards a bit, almost taunting your resolve as you press him back down into the mattress. 
“Lovely,” You hum, stroking the glass toy between your fingers before bringing it to his mouth, tapping his lips. “Open.” He complies quickly, parting his lips as you slide the tip of the toy in, reveling in his moans. He looks so… right, like this. Eyes wide and eager as his tongue laps at the cool glass, tracing the ridges, legs spread, and cock twitching in excitement. You can’t help but wonder why you didn’t do this sooner. 
You push the fake cock just a little further past his lips before letting him take hold of it, turning to other matters. 
“Warm that up please, you wouldn’t want it to be cold when I fill you up.” As you murmur those words he groans against the glass. 
Unceremoniously you spit into your hand, giddy with excitement as you nudge his legs a bit further apart. You spread the plush flesh of his ass to notch your digits at his hole, gently pushing just the tip of your pointer finger in, feeling him tighten around you with a gasp. 
“Relax, my love.” You coo, waiting until his muscles release a bit before pushing onward. This isn’t your first time doing this sort of thing of course but it is the first time he’s going to be taking something other than your fingers or tongue, so you work him open slowly. Watching the stress unravel from his body as you work in a second finger, curling and scissoring them as his back arches, cock bobbing against his stomach as his fingers grip the sheets around him. 
When he’s able to take three of your fingers you pull the toy from his mouth with a soft pop, the toy slick with spit and properly warmed easily slips into the designated slot on your harness. He watches with a palpable anticipation as you get yourself situated. When you’re ready you’re kneeling between his legs, glass cock standing proudly against your pelvis. 
“Ready?” You ask as you gently lift his legs, bringing his knees to his chest as he nods, damn near whimpering. 
You push into him, slowly, as you gauge his reaction. Usually he’s all grunts and grumbles during sex but now he’s gasps and whines. His hands clutch the pillows surrounding his head as he tries to push himself further onto the toy but the position you’ve got him in keeps him in place. 
“You want more?” There’s a mocking lilt to your voice as he nods rapidly.
“Yes- please.” He purses his lips as he whimpers and you’re more than happy to oblige, watching the sight before you as his hole swallows your cock, his own dick leaking against his stomach, begging for a release. You adjust your hips a bit, watching his back attempt to arch as you do so. “Th-there.” His voice is strained as you hit that sweet spot inside of him. Ever so gently you pull out before rocking yourself back against it. 
“There? Is that what you want?” You continue to speak in a teasing tone but you truly want to know, this is all for his sake, you want so badly to make him feel good. His cheeks are flushed, warm skin slick with sweat as he continues to nod. You repeat the motion a few more times, caught off guard when he lets out a low whine and you watch as his cock pulses, untouched, as he paints his torso. His breath catches in his throat as he does so. “Oh my, look at the mess you’ve made, and so quickly.” You drag a finger over his heaving chest, scooping up some of his spend to taste, letting the bitter sweetness coat your tongue. “You were more pent up than I thought, my love. I think you still have some stress that needs releasing.” 
“I-I’m sorry.” He stammers, looking a bit embarrassed but you immediately shake your head, leaning forward to kiss his forehead while simultaneously sinking back into him.
“Don’t apologize for feeling good, sunshine. That’s what this is all for.” You bump your nose against his, hoping to reassure him. “Do you think you could give me one more, I just want to make sure I get all the stress out.” You emphasize your words with a small push of his legs tighter against his chest, earning a soft mewl from him. 
“I can do one more.” 
“Wonderful.” You kiss his cheek before picking up the same pace you were at just moments ago. Happily watching his cock jump back to life. You take the opportunity to drag your fingers through the cum cooling on his abdomen, drawing little shapes as he begins to reach that same peak rapidly all over again. You adore the sight of your glass cock sliding in and out of him. He takes you so well, his hole fluttering as he lets you fuck him. You wish you had a real cock just so you could feel him tighten around you but this will have to do. His neglected dick continues to rest against his happy trail, desperate to be touched. This time you help him out, wrapping your hand around his cock, with a few quick pumps he’s coating his stomach in cum all over again.
It’s positively euphoric to see the prince of Dorne like this. 
Just for you. Spread before you without a care in the world, stuffed full of your cock and happy as can be.
You give him a moment to catch his breath before pulling out, peppering his cheeks with kisses before slipping out of the harness and leaving to get him some water as well as something to wipe him up with. 
You gently wipe him down with a warm washcloth, cleaning him while continuing to kiss his face as he yawns. 
“Thank you.” He mumbles, taking your face in his hands, pulling you forward for another kiss. 
“Anytime, we take care of each other, I’m just glad you’re feeling better.” You climb under the blankets with him, tangling your limbs with his as he rests his face in the crook of your neck, clearly exhausted as he falls asleep against you. You feel your own exhaustion hit, smiling to yourself as you close your eyes. You couldn’t be happier that he let you try things your way.
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the-writer-ofthe-fandoms · 11 months ago
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Silent Cosmos (Edward Cullen) (Ch. 3)
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Pairing: Edward Cullen x GN! Mute!Reader
Words: 2.8k+
Warning(s): Two gross dudes, sexual verbal harassment (not towards reader), swearing,
A/N: omg chapter 3 is finally here. I apologize for the wait. I thought my semester this time around would be forgiving but NOPE. I had so much to do and read, I could hardly write for fun or draw either. I hadn't realized how long it had been since I last posted. I want to try a new method when writing series. I tried with my kpop writing blog, and its where I write a few chapters at a time then periodically post them. Helps keep the flow and motivation going, but that may have been a one off there.
Series Masterlist
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"O star of strength! I see thee stand And smile upon my pain; Thou beckonest with thy mailèd hand, And I am strong again... The Star of the unconquered will, He rises in my breast, Serene, and resolute, and still, And calm, and self-possessed. -- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, "The Light of Stars"
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Edward hasn't been in school for the past few days.
You admittedly felt a little lonely without his presence, though Emmett and Alice have made it their mission to become your new best friends. Jasper tried but he still kept his distance from you, which you didn't mind. Rosalie helped when no other Cullen was around, although she kept a lot of conversations at a minimum, which you also didn't mind.
Alice had told you Edward had gotten a bad cold, so he is staying home. You had offered to bring him your notes the first time so he could copy them down, but Alice told you their father has him basically on lock down until he is deemed healthy. So, after you've done your homework, you've been making copies of your notes to give him when he comes back.
It's the start of a new day and once again, Edward wasn't there. You were at your locker with 15 minutes to spare. You placed the spare folder with Edward's notes on the shelf while your mind went back to that moment you two shared at the welcoming party for your uncle. You felt happy telling him all the stars and constellation you could see, and even happier when he seemed thoroughly interested in your rambles. However, you feel an inkling of guilt when you remember he gave you his jacket. Maybe he got sick from that?
"Dude, I got this weird spot on my dick."
Well, there goes your musings of guilt. You glance to your left and see two guys near you, just chilling against the lockers. You've never met them, though you do remember sharing a class or two with them separately.
"Are you really airing your business out when someone is standing right their?" The shorter one, with dirty blonde hair and hazel eyes gestures to you.
"Relax, Mark. That's the deaf student." The taller one with deep brown eyes and brown hair says with a laugh. You suppress the urge to roll your eyes and choose to just focus on the inside of your locker. Maybe you should get more decorations- "Anyways, I have this weird spot on my dick. It almost looks like I have a weird mole there. I'm hoping it's just a new mole and Cindy didn't give me something."
Gross.
"I'd get that shit checked out then. You don't want it to turn into something worse if it is an STD." Mark says with a sigh. "I told you not to sleep with her, Tony. She made my balls itch like crazy. They still fucking itch."
"I think its just a weird mole. You wanna look?" He cackles while his friend fake gags. They both push off the lockers and walk away to who knows where.
You let out a deep sigh and close your locker. At least the ignorance of other allows you to hear some gossip.
"What's with the sigh, Tiny?" Emmett calls out as he and Rosalie approach you. He has very quickly taken to the nickname Tiny for you. You suppose anyone shorter than him would be considered tiny in his eyes. Rosalie simply opened her locker as you and Emmett conversed.
"Oh, just overheard two people talking about something that should have been a private conversation." You respond with a slight shrug.
"Gah, Forks High is full of a bunch of weirdos, huh?" He grins and raises his brows a few times, crossing his arms while leaning on the locker next to you. You silently chuckle and nod, though you wondered if there was an underlying joke there.
"No Edward today?"
"Nope. Carlisle still hasn't cleared him." He sighs with a sympathetic smile. "Between you and me, Tiny, Edward is still shitting his brains out." He signed that last portion to you.
You gave him a scandalized look and playfully slapped his arm with a small chuckle. You were surprised to feel just how hard his muscles were.
"What was that for?" He gripped where you slapped and pretended to be hurt. "It was a private conversation, no one else here except Rosalie knows sign."
You roll your eyes and shake your head with a smile. You could always count on Emmett to get you to smile.
"C'mon, Rose and I will walk you to first period, like always." He grins and gestures you to follow him. Rose simply came along since she and Em were in the class next to yours. You nod and follow, happy to have good company.
---
It was a passing period and it was just you and Rose at your lockers. You grabbed a new pen and pencil since the last two you had broke and ran out of ink. Rosalie was fluffing up her already perfect, blond hair in the mirror of her locker. She and you didn't converse much, but you still liked her presence. Like the rest of the Cullens, she didn't tiptoe around you or treated you differently. She acknowledged your presence and would answer you if you had questions.
You were about finished in your locker when you heard two familiar voices keep up their gross conversations behind you.
"Dude, Rosalie has the hottest ass." Tony practically jeers, his voice intentionally loud. You glance to the blond next to you and she still keeps fixing her hair, though you can see her brows are a little more furrowed and her lips are more in the shape of a frown.
"Her tits, man, her tits are where it's at." Replies Mark and when you shift just enough to see him in the corner of your eyes, you see him make an obscene gesture.
You hear the slight creek of metal and when you look to Rose, you see her grip is so tight on her locker door that her fingers made indents which made your eyes widen for a moment. She closes her locker and you can see by her side profile she is pissed, and rightfully so.
So, you do what you think would make her laugh at the expense of those two guys.
You tap her arm to get her attention and she looks at you with a glare. You don't let it faze you. If those two are going to be gross about your friend, you'll just air out their business that they so willingly aired out by you this morning.
"You know those two jackasses?" You intentionally look to them as you sign and look back at her. "Well the brown haired one has a spot on his penis that he isn't sure if it's a mole or an STD. And his buddy likely doesn't wash right since he's had prolonged itchy balls."
Rosalie looks almost scandalized until her eyes widen for a moment as she looks at the two dudes and then back to you. She covers her mouth as she laughs when she realizes what you're trying to do.
You were about to sign some more when the two dumbasses approach.
"I know you were talking shit. What the fuck did you sign?" Tony glared, pointing an accusatory finger at you. He gets in your face and you swear you hear Rosalie growl.
You swallow thickly and decide to open your mouth. Your aunt always said you got your stubbornness from your mom.
"I said..." You try not to wince at the pain in your throat, your voice sounding hoarse. "You had a weird spot on your dick and your friend... has itchy balls." They looked at you with wide, horrified looks. "Don't talk about someone's body if you don't want yours talked about either."
"You little shit." Mark hisses and Rose steps closer to your side, an arm just barely in front of yours.
"What's going on here?" Emmetts voice grows louder as he approaches, his usual, carefree smile no longer on his face. He looked scarier than you've ever seen him. Mark and Tony looked at each other before slinking off.
Once they were gone you let out a dry, painful cough. You cover your mouth with the back of your hand and quickly grab your water and drink, soothing your throat. You could taste a tiny bit of iron in the back of your throat as you drank.
Rosalie calls your name softly. "Are you okay?"
You nod in response and take another sip of water. You didn't catch the look they gave each other or Rose gesturing for Emmett to speak.
"What happened, Tiny?" He asks in a quiet tone. You close the cap of your bottle and place it back in your bag. Your throat still ached but you knew the pain from using your larynx will linger.
You start to sign to him everything that occurred, from what you overheard in the morning to him approaching. You can see a flash of anger on his face but he goes back to that small smile. Once you explained your words to Rose and why you said them, a huge grin breaks out on his face.
"I didn't know you had it in you, Tiny." He laughs and pats your shoulder a little too firmly.
"Come, I'll walk you to class." Rosalie said with a soft tone. You nod and wave goodbye  to Emmett. You both start heading down the hallway, the blond next to you tense.
When you got to your class a pale hand stopped you. You look to Rose with a questioning look while her gold eyes avoid yours.
"I just wanted to say thank you for earlier." Rosalie says, the tense look she had fades into a small smile, her eyes meeting yours. You see some vulnerability in her usually guarded gaze. She gives your shoulder a squeeze before dropping her hand. "You didn't have to do that. I'm... admittedly used to that."
"No need to thank me, Rosalie." You smile back at her.
"I do, because not many would step up like that." She softly sighs and her smile grows a bit. You felt her words had more meaning to them, but you decided to not linger on them for now. "I know I've been slightly avoiding you but I have a hard time trusting hu- new people. But, after today, I think I want to open up a bit and be friends."
"I'd like that too." You beam. "Alice has been begging me to do a shopping trip, maybe the three of us can plan a trip soon."
"I'd... I'd like that." She almost looks like she is relieved and less guarded.
"Is your hand okay?"
"What?"
"Well, I saw you grip your locker and you dented it."
"Oh. Yeah, it's fine. I work on cars and my grip is strong. It's nothing." She holds out her hands and you saw just flawless skin. "Well, I will see you soon. Class is starting."
"Talk to you later." You wave and go to class. You sit down at your usual spot and start preparing. You sigh, irritated at the way those two spoke about Rose so loudly. But you also felt happy you and Rose were close now. Her bending the locker was suspicious... there were many things off with the Cullens that you've picked up, however, you don't linger on it. They have their quirks much like you have your own.
---
Edward lounged on the couch reading, back from his trip up to the Denali clan to clear his head. After witnessing that nightmare from you, he needed a moment alone to sort his thoughts. He wasn't sure what he felt afterwards but once he took some time to sort out his thoughts, he came back to Forks. None of the others knew what happened. He didn't tell them those details of your life, as none of them were privy to it. He wasn't either but that bridge has been crossed thanks to his ability and curiosity of the galaxy protecting your mind.
He felt guilt initially when he realized he deeply invaded your privacy. Then, despair and immense sadness followed when he recalls back to your nightmare, your past. Edward had seen many horrors in his long life, he even committed some when he'd hunt those men. However when he witnessed what you went through, he couldn't help feel a spark of protectiveness. You were nice. He found you a joy to be around despite it not being long since you transferred. He doesn't want anything bad to happen to you.
Edward couldn't help but smile when he thought back to you and him outside the fire station. It was a peaceful moment. He couldn't help but linger on the sight of you in his jacket, pointing out the stars and constellations. It was silent other than your internal thoughts. And when he got to witness your galaxy so at peace? He also felt a sense of tranquility he longs for.
Edward quickly put those thoughts away and resumed his attention his book when he heard his adoptive siblings come in. Alice and Jasper pass without saying to him, which he was slightly thankful for. However, Emmett and Rosalie lingered by him.
"How can I help you both?" Edward sighs, snapping the book closed as he looks at both of them.
Rose crosses her arms. "You need to come back tomorrow."
"Why? Did something happen?"
"Yeah, Tiny happened." Emmett grinned and gestured to Rosalie. The blond sighed and let the memory replay of you standing up for her so Edward can see what happened today. He furrows his brows, setting his book down. He stands up from the couch and looks between the two.
"My guess is those two will probably retaliate against our friend one way or another." Rosalie says softly. Edward chooses not to point out how she said 'our friend.' "You spend the most time with them, they'll need you to stick around them the most."
Edward nods slowly. He recognizes Mark and Tony, and he knows they each have a class with him and you. He's heard the thoughts that spew from them both like garbage and he knows they aren't above getting back at someone.
"I'll come back tomorrow." He confirms. He wanted one more day to himself, but tomorrow is good as ever to face you again. He knows how you lost your voice and how you ended up living with your uncle and aunt now, but you don't know he knows. And he'll have to keep that in mind.
Although, Edward couldn't help but smile at the sound of your voice in Rosalie's memory. It was rough and hoarse, and it caused you pain, pain he doesn't want you feeling again... but it was nice hearing that voice that matches to the one in your head... when that space of yours is dropped.
---
You make your way to your locker first thing in the morning. You get yourself situated, grabbing the things you need for your classes before lunch. You set aside the folder where you kept your copies of notes for Edward down on the small shelf. You huff softly, throat still feeling sore from using your voice.
A familiar voice calling your name has you spinning around quickly, a smile instantly growing on your face. Edward approaches you with a small smile, looking the same as he did the last time you saw him.
"Glad to see you're feeling better." You grin, your mind flashing back to what Emmett signed to you in regards to Edward's health. You catch your friend's eyebrow twitch, a flash of annoyance on his face that he quickly recovered.
A Cullen quirk, you muse to yourself.
"Yeah. I'm doing a lot better now." He replies softly, standing  a little closer to you than usual.
"I have something for you." You see his eyebrow quirk as you turn back to your locker. You pull out the black folder and hand him it. "Notes for the classes we share."
Edward stares down at the folder before chuckling. He looks up at you and gives you brilliant smile, one that makes your heart flutter for just a moment. "Thank you, I really appreciate it."
"Of course."
Suddenly, you feel hand on your back. Edward was standing much closer to you with an expression akin to a scowl as he stares off a little. He looks to you and smiles softly, though you can still see the tension on his face.
"We should get to the classroom. I'll probably have questions about what I missed." He says in a low voice. You nod, a little confused by his demeanor. You finish up with your locker and let him guide through the hallway, his cold hand still resting on the middle of your back.
You weren't aware of Tony's and Mark's presences until you both were walking by them to your first period classroom. You paid them no mind, keeping your focus ahead of you. Doing this, however, has you missing the deep and threatening glare from Edward towards the both of them.
As you both walked through the hallway, Edward felt that his non-existent blood boiling at the degrading, violent, and nasty thoughts those two were thinking. He knew they both weren't the best that Forks has to offer, their thoughts sometimes louder than others.
That protective urge he felt after witnessing your nightmare? It's working overtime now and he isn't completely sure why.
What Edward does know that he won't let them try anything towards you.
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Taglist: @buckybarnes-1917​, @trawberry-fire​ , @dreamy-caramel​, @urgirlfriendspage @azazel-nyx @stinkii-boii @vanessalovesonedirection @sunnyisntthere @theatrenerd101601 @awesomebooklover17 @esposadomd @whichwitchisthebitch @bofadeezs @gons-dad-is-gon-e @kathsuhki @aoi-targaryen @srh-006 @onlyheretosimp
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restinslices · 10 months ago
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I love your stuff so much, could you write something with the reader getting jealous about Smoke? Someone getting a bit too close to him and the reader feels bad about it. And Tomas finds out and comforts her, finding it endearing.
And I love you💕 Idk why this was kicking my ass so bad. I did two drafts and idk if I like this but this is all I got😔
Word count: 1476
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Tomas was not entirely stupid. 
Sure he had moments where he'd made something that should've been simple,  incredibly complicated but he wasn't stupid. He didn't think so at least. 
Anyone who's been around him for the past week might disagree though. 
Tomas had just returned from a mission along with his brothers, and naturally he was telling you all about it. If you were being honest with yourself, you weren't really listening. Tomas tended to ramble and his missions were usually the same as the last, so it was best to let him go on and on but still add commentary here and there. “Wow”, “Really?”, “No you didn't”, and other side comments would hold him. 
Your ears perked up and you started to listen more when he started mentioning women.
It's not that he couldn't speak to other women or he couldn't have female friends, you weren't that crazy. It was just the way he was describing them. Great fighters, moving with the wind, long flowy hair that danced in the sun. It was compliment after compliment, and as much as you hated to admit it, it made your heart squeeze. 
“Wanna tell me how they all looked in detail?” You said sarcastically. You expected Tomas to hear your sarcasm, realize what was wrong, apologize and keep telling his story. Instead he just chuckled and said 
“Then we'd be here all day”. 
Unfortunately for you, the day got worse. 
Another woman whose name you hadn't memorized was all over him. Giggling at jokes that weren't nearly as funny as she pretended they are and finding any reason to touch him. 
You should've said something. You should've communicated your feelings. That's how relationships are supposed to work. 
But you didn't. 
On one hand, you thought you had every reason to be jealous and if Tomas actually cared for your feelings, then he would've picked up on this and apologized. On the other hand you thought you were being unreasonable. Tomas couldn't help if some ditzy bitch liked him. Plus, you never told him how you felt, so you couldn't be mad at him for not understanding. In the same breath though, why didn't he tell her to get off of him and why did he feel it was necessary to describe how great these other women he met were? 
You were arguing with yourself for a solid week, and each day that devil on your shoulder got louder. After all, if Tomas did care about how you felt, he'd stop entertaining that girl. Everytime she was near, you left. Didn't you absence bother him?
But once again, that damn angel got in the way telling you to just be honest with him. He'd understand. How can you be mad at something you hadn't communicated upsets you?
But communication came with shame. How would you look telling Tomas that you got a little butt hurt about him talking about other girls and a girl that kept flirting with him? He'd either understand, or he'd be upset. That's how relationships fell apart, right?
No. It was the lack of communication. 
Maybe?
“I'm gonna throw myself down the stairs” you mumbled. 
“Why?” he asked. 
You somehow forgot he was there. You and him were in charge of washing dishes for the week, but neither of you had been talking. 
“I just hate washing dishes” you said, not completely lying. 
It went silent again, the only thing filling the air being the sounds of you washing and him rinsing. 
Then that silence was broken. 
“Are you ignoring me?” he asked. You didn't know how to answer. You didn't mean to ignore him. You were just in your head a lot. 
You didn't answer and he sighed. “Did I do something?”
“No” you answered without thinking. It was a reflex at this point. Tomas over thought things a lot and you'd have to remind him not everything was on him. Telling him he wasn't at fault was natural, but you weren't sure who was at fault now. 
“I mean… I don't know. It doesn't matter”
“It does to me”
“Does it?”. 
You closed your eyes and breathed slowly. You were being way too harsh and you knew it. Tomas was asking you to share what was going on in your head, and you were saying no?
You opened your eyes again. Your mouth opened a few times, trying to figure out how to put what you were feeling but it never felt right. 
“I don't know how to get this out. It doesn't even make sense in my head. It won't make sense out loud”
“Just say it anyway and I'll ask you questions if I'm confused”. You wondered how Tomas was so good and patient and wondered if he learned that from one of his parents. Or maybe his sister. Either way, you mentally thanked whoever he learned from. 
“Ok so, I just feel- no. No, I should explain first in chronological order. You came back and then… actually that sounds really accusatory”. You groaned and looked over at him “can you just tell me to shut the fuck up”. 
He smiled a little and shook his head. “I wanna hear it. We have all day”. 
“It's late at night. That is not true”. He didn't respond and he wouldn't until you confessed whatever you were thinking. 
“Chronological order then…”, after some more stumbling and backtracking you managed to get it all out. Why you were jealous, when it started, how conflicted you felt and how ashamed you felt for being jealous in the first place. The whole time he just listened, nodded, and furrowed his brows at some parts. You couldn't tell if it was confusion or anger. 
“I didn't mean it that way” he said when you were done. “When I said 'then we’d be here all day’. I just meant there was a lot of them, which I realize now still sounds bad but I didn't mean it in some 'they were just too beautiful’ way. I didn't hear your sarcasm”
“And I just kept conversation with her to be nice. I don't know. I didn't wanna seem rude”
“Being rude can go a long way”
“I guess. And I noticed your absence, I just didn't know why. I figured you needed space for whatever reason, so I didn't bother you”
“I think it's impossible for you to bother me”. 
Once again, he smiled and let out a small laugh. You looked back down at the soapy water and that's when you felt like a complete idiot. You were worrying him when you could've been had this conversation. 
“I'm an idiot”
“I don’t think so” and you could tell by his voice that he was smirking. “I think you're just really in love with me”
“Ok buddy”. You rolled your eyes, even if he was right. 
“It's cute”
“It's embarrassing”
“Loving me or-”
“Being jealous. I haven't been that jealous before with anyone else”
“I'm not like anyone else”
“You're white. You're quite literally like everyone else-” Tomas flicked water your way, some of it getting in your eye. 
“I'm gonna kill you”
“You wouldn't. You'd get jealous over the Grim Reaper”. You frowned but he kept smiling that stupid smile that was both loving and antagonistic. Then he laughed. A nice heartfelt laugh that ended up making you crack a smile. 
“Are you smiling because I'm laughing?”
“Absolutely not”,  you lied. 
“You really got a thing for me”
“I've never met you a day in my life”
“That's even more embarrassing then if you're that in love with me”. You went to make another smart comment, but he bumped his shoulder against yours “hey”, he said softly. So soft it threw you off guard. “I think it's cute. You're like a little guard dog”. 
“Were you dropped on your head as a baby and now your social cues are scrambled? A guard dog? I'd prefer if you stabbed me. Here-”, you went to grab a knife but he caught your hand. Any other time you would've hated this. Both your hands were soaking and something about the feel of that made you skin crawl, but you guessed you could deal with that. 
“I think it's cute that you love me so much. I just wish you'd be more honest about what you feel. I was worried”. 
You cringed. You supposed that was your fault. You and your dumb brain making shit complicated, which is something you swore was more of a Tomas thing. 
“I'll be better. I promise. I'll start now”
“Now?”
“Now. The texture of you wet hand makes me wanna die. Please unhand me”. He couldn't help but laugh as he let you go, and you couldn't help but laugh as well. 
You didn't know what you were laughing at. 
You were just happy to be laughing together. 
Finally getting back to requests. The crowd goes wild. Tumblr has this big space between lines so I cannot tell if the format is weird and I should add more space or if I’m tweaking. Oh well.
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mayzi33 · 7 months ago
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*clears throat.*
(apologize in advance for any mistakes english isn't my first language)
Alright. Here we go.
Look, I haven't watched MLP in a LONGGGG time. But recently with all the stuff I missed our and since the fandom is still pretty much alive and well I decided to take peek by peek in the seasons I haven't watched.
Until I came across, these guys
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And I have so much to say.
I didn't write a script for this or anything so I don't know where this rambling is going so I just ask you to bear with me for as much as you can, okay?
Look, watching the Young Six episodes I've experienced one of the things that angers me the most. SUCH. WASTED. POTENTIAL.
You're telling me we got whatever the hell is G5 when instead we could have gotten THESE GUYS???? THESE COOL, UNIQUE CHARACTERS THAT ACTUALLY HAVE AN INTERESTING STORY THAT MAKES SENSE AND HAVE SI MUCH POTENTIAL TO BE ONE OF THE SICKEST LORE ARCS IN MLP???
I homestly don't know what Hasbro WAS THINKING in giving them so little screentime. There's so much I have to say but I'll try my best to keep my thoughts organized.
First things first, we'll need to talk a little about G5 or "Make Your Mark" series or whatever. I personally enjoyed the movie, though the story didn't make much sense (we'll get to that later) the characters were pretty nice, the songs were catchy and the animation was mwah. I didn't bother to watch all of the G5 series, because- (pardon to all who enjoy it) it's so. Freaking. Boring. Like I know there's a pony girl that's supposed to be a traitor among them but then grows onto being their actual friend and there's a villainess and that whole conflict and yada yada yada. But honestly there just isn't anything I found enganging in the entire thing. I can't explain it, it just feels- off. I know I probably don't have much right to talk, cause again, only now I'm diving into the mlp again after missing out A LOT, but I just can't bring myself to like that series.
Now, the whole School Of Friendship saga in the G4 series with our beloved Young Six, I know some people had some issues with it and it didn't please everyone, and while it does have some flaws and is certainly not perfect, you can't deny there was lots of potential. (I'll try to not overuse that word I'm sorry)
I personally, really liked the concept of different creatures from different cultures coming together and forming the perfectly diverse friend group. Episodes like The Hearth's Warming Club and What Lies Beneath were particuarly really fun, it was nice to dive into their cultures and backstories while also watching the six of them be vulnerable in front of one another and grow closer. If only they had more screentime and more deep episodes like that, they could have been in the top 10 found families in cartoons.
Now, just some other reasons as to why I think they're interesting characters and should've gotten more than what was given to them.
Because
1- Their whole deal is that they're not all ponies, that they're all different species. We get to learn lots about their different cultures and customs. It would've been such a good way to teach children about acceptance and respecting differences while also being entertaining. Especially in a school enviroment.
2- We got not one, but TWO male characters in the group. It would make little boys that are interested in mlp feel more comfortable and valid for it. AND those two males also have distinct personalities and their own active roles. Gallus being sort of the leader of the group, and Sandbar being the only pony therefore the one to stand up for his friends.
3- While they're supposed to be the new represantives of the elements of harmonies, their personalities are still interesting and different from the Mane 6.
Onto that, I really like how it's implied they could be the next helders (or whatever its called) of the elements of harmony. Given their special connection to the tree, how similiar they are to the previous groups (Mane 6 and The Pillars) and how Twilight LITERALLY LIFTED THEM UP AS WELL WHILE SHE SPOKE ABOUT HOW THE ELEMENTS WILL LIVE ON, it would've been such a cool concept.
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Onto that, I wanna talk a bit about each of their characters too and how I think they could've been dealt with.
Gallus is the element of magic, but unlike Twilight who's all open and confident-spoken about friendship and all, Gallus is probably the one in the group that's the most closed-off and dislikes getting all cheesy. It would've been interesting seeing his development as the helder ot the element of magic. AND ESPECIALLY since he doesn't have magic in the first place, since Twilight and Starwirl were unicorns. So maybe he could make posions? Get powers someway else? Many posibilities
Sandbar is the element of kindness, but unlike Fluttershy he's extrovert and down to making friends. His overrall personality is that he's constantly very chill-going and nothing seems to ever upset or annoy him. So it also would've been interesting to see how that pattern would break, especially because of his element.
Yona is the element of honesty. She's probably the one that has the hardest time adapting to the Equestrians among the group, and even tried to act like a pony instead of herself one episode. It would've been interesting to see how her element of honesty reflects on how she should be true to herself, especially since her Yak culture comes a lot with honor.
Ocellus is the element of genority, yet, unlike Rarity, she's a lot more like Fluttershy, being timid and insecure, while also being smart and well-read like Twilight. It would've been nice if her development with her element would be gaining confidence in herself and being generous to others that way. Especially since she has a fear of being like the old changling queen (forgot her name) so imagine if she just turned out to be the opposite of her. Instead of selfish and cruel, being generous and kind.
Smolder is the element of loyality, but also like Gallus, she's also not into getting cheesy. But what I find imteresting about her is how she tries to keep her tough, agressive persona (since thats how dragons are) yet it is revealed she's actually interested in cute, fluffy stuff like tea parties and dresses. So it would've been cool to see her growing confident in admiting her interests, therefore being more like Rainbow Dash, who's always confident on herself
And last but not least, Silverstream is the element of laughter. But what's hooking about it is the fact that Silverstream herself probably hasn't KNOWN what laughter is for a long time, having to hide under The Storm King's rule. She's very talkctive, creative and extrovert, like Pinkie Pie, but she also has her trauma that haunts and intimidates her, unlike Pinkie who usually faces her fears headfront. Another great development story.
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So just hear me out, okay. I don't care if MLP is over. I don't care if there's G5.
We. Need. A. Young. Six. Spin-off. Series.
I know it sounds crazy, but I genuely think this idea could work out if it was handled well enough, and Hasbro could make some good money out of this.
Just bear with me. A spin-off series set on the timeline between season 8-9 aka, still on the School Of Friendship, focused entirely on the Young Six. We could still get the Mane 6, of course, but mostly as support characters. It doesn't have to be a particularly long series, (though maybe that could work as well IF handled with enough care) maybe just 2 seasons or so. And I'm not thinking like a slice-of-life or fun little extra kind of thing, I'm thinking of ACTUAL lore. Just more about how the tree and the elements work, and how these six students could grow into being their new helders. In each episode it becomes more and more evident to them and the Mane 6 themselves that they're going to be the next generation of the elements. So imagine once they all fully it figure out and talk about it, the Y6 suddenly feel this pressure about how they're supposed to live up to their teachers and fear that they have to be EXACTLY like them. So we see Sandbar taking extra kindness classes with Fluttershy, Yona taking extra honesty classes with Applejack and heck even Gallus is taking studies more seriously (especially since he's supposed to be the element of magic which again I find imteresting since he doesn't really have magic at least not the way Twilight and Starwirl do. ) So we could have an entire episode about the M6 getting through to them and showing they don't have to be JUST LIKE THEM nor The Pillars. They can be their own people.
Another main-plot idea would be having more villains, probably trying to test them or tear them apart (cough cough like Swift Foot from the idw comics cough cough) or maybe you could even fit someone as intense as King Sombra, or maybe even even the return of Tirek, Cozy Glow and Chrysalis in there. (I remembered her name yay)
And, of course, more onto their characters, flaws, backstories and cultures! I would love to see more about their people and customs, just as much as I would love to explore their traumas, fears, ugly sides and how they overcome it together (cough cough found family COUGH COUGH GAGS)
And another thing, I especially would've liked to explore Yona's and Sandbar's relantioship.
I MEAN LOOK AT THEM-
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Don't they give massive beauty-and-the-beast vibes? I love how their colors and body types contrast with one and another, and their personalities aswell. Yona being loud, cheerful and clumsy while Sandbar is calm, thoughtful and carefree. I just love the big girl x soooorta small guy vibes and I especially loved how gentle and reassuring Sandbar was towards her in that episode. I mean, "I don't care if you're not a pony, you're the best Yona I know." SERIOUSLY? WHO WROTE THAT LINE? I'D LIKE TO GIVE THEM A HUG. And also, onto the spin-off series matter, it would also be a cool topic to explore. Imagine if some ponies/yaks are judging them for having a relantioship while being different species and they learn to ignore them and live past that??? I usually don't care much for romance, (always prefered friendship and found families) but this would've been a nice little arc and episode theme to see.
Lastly, (I'm almost done I promise) to the more technical/economical part.
Like I said in the beggining, I genuely think Hasbro could make some good money out of this. Firstly because it will be using the G4 characters and lore and not...whatever mess of a plot G5 is.
And secondly because, if they took the time to give them some cool power-up designs like they did with the Mane 6, I'M SURE the toys would sell.
I mean- JUST LOOK AT THESE COOL DESIGNS I FOUND ON THE INTERNET?? (not mine, credits to whoever made it, you ate that)
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DON'T THEY LOOK LIKE A TOY SET THAT WOULD CATCH THE CHILDREN'S EYES ON THE TOY AISLE? OH YES I THINK THEY WOULD.
And if anything, they could be as bold as to make an extra Equestria Girls (well, girls and boys) series with them. I know it sounds kinda dumb, especially given the fact that I'm not sure about how that would work given that when Spike went to the "human dimension" or whatever he turned to a dog... So Smolder would also be a dog? Sandbar would be the only actual human in the group?... BUT I'm sure they could come up with some excuse to make it work. Give them some cool, colorful outfits for different events and I'm sure it would sell. And ESPECIALLY since with Gallus and Sandbar in the group, it could get the attetion of young boys aswell.
Anyways. That was it.
Uhm. Conclusion: Hasbro should hire me. I know what I'm talking about. I think. At least a bit.
And I genuely think this could work if only SOMEONE gave it the time and care.
I don't know how to end ramblings so uhmmmm thank you all for coming to my pep talk.
They deserved better.
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