#apart from ej hey girl

[littlemissemeritus]

i dont care that he only has three fingers, it just means i can take all of them 🤷

[luneengene2]

HIS FUTURE EMPRESS (1)

~ Warnings : Contains smut content!

~ Synopsis : When EJ, the crown prince, fell in love with his sister's lady-in-waiting. Is the love story going smoothly?

~ A/N : Has two parts

|| crown prince!euijoo x fem!oc ||

Byun Dynasty, a successful dynasty that survived until the modern era in South Korea. They were able to lead South Korea and save the monarchy, when the South Korean monarchy almost collapsed in 1910. They were able to win over the hearts of the people at that time after the Joseon dynasty was truly on the verge of collapse, as a result they are now the ones leading South Korea.

South Korea was truly prosperous and very advanced in the hands of the Byun dynasty. In fact, their economy is almost evenly distributed. Even their current Emperor, Byun Jiho, is famous for his high level of innovation in development and gender equality. Apart from that, he was very loyal to his wife and never had dozens or even dozens of mistresses like his father and other predecessors.

Jiho and his wife were blessed with a boy and a girl. His first child, a girl, was born in 1999, named Byun Hajoon. Hajoon has the title 'Her Imperial Highness The Princess Hajoon' (Korean : 제후한예 공주 하준). His second and youngest child, a boy, was born in 2002, his name is Byun Euijoo. Euijoo is of course the main heir to his father, because he is a boy. He has the title of Crown Prince and will one day become the next Emperor after his father dies.

When Euijoo started to grow up, South Korean people were very relieved because Euijoo really resembled his father in terms of behavior. He spoke out for gender equality which made women feel very helped for the second time after his father also helped very well before. The innovations that Euijoo often provides never go out of style but do not harm any party.

Status, wealth, and good looks make Euijoo adored by girls in his country. Many of them dream of becoming Euijoo's lover, marrying him. Oh of course, who doesn't want to be Euijoo's life partner?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Euijoo entered the palace at six in the afternoon because he was visiting his grandmother, the queen mother, because his grandmother wanted to meet him before she left for Japan for a charity event.

When he was about to go to the kitchen first, he bumped into a girl who was carrying a lot of books. Making the servants who were working panic because their crown prince fell.

"Hey, be careful when you walk! You hit the crown prince!" The Head Maid cursed at the girl who looked much more in pain than Euijoo, because she was crushed by the thick books she was carrying.

Euijoo, who got up first from his fallen position, immediately approached the girl. "Hey, are you okay, miss?” Euijoo put away the books that fell on that girl. Then he helped the girl to get up, when Euijoo wanted to speak again to ask about the girl's condition (again), Euijoo was stunned. A girl with slightly curly hair, pink lips, light brown eyes, white skin and slender height. She is very beautiful. Not only that, when he held the girl's arm, Euijoo felt a strange feeling gathering in his stomach, something between tense and flowery.

"Aren't you trained well? You almost got the crown prince hurt!" A sharp rebuke from the Head Maid brought Euijoo back to his senses. He was also shocked.

"I-I'm sorry, Highness. I really didn't mean to bump into you, I was in a hurry," The girl looked at Euijoo and the surrounding area with fear. Euijoo just smiled. "No need to apologize, it's my fault. I should be the one apologizing." Euijoo said softly, he didn't want the girl to be afraid of him.

"Oh yeah, what's your name?"

"My name? My name is Lee Eunji, Highness,"

"Eunji, next time you're holding a lot of things, ask someone else for help. Don't bring it yourself, it's dangerous," EJ smiled faintly then stroked Eunji's shoulder. Eunji immediately became more tense because she was stroked by the crown prince before he left in front of her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Euijoo knows that Eunji is his older sister's main lady-in-waiting. She was born from a middle-lower class but has a noble lineage from the Joseon dynasty. That means the dynasty was replaced by the Byun dynasty. Her mother sent her to the selection event held to choose Princess Hajoon's lady-in-waiting. And coincidentally she was elected with three other candidates.

Eunji's mother hopes that when Eunji becomes Princess Hajoon's lady-in-waiting, her family's economy can improve further, especially since the salary at the palace is very high. Eunji could be chosen because of her intelligence even though she had just graduated from high school, because Princess Hajoon really likes intelligent ladies-in-waiting, she wants her ladies-in-waiting to help in all aspects, not only in the household aspect.

His first meeting with Eunji succeeded in making Euijoo unable to sleep at all. For some reason, his brain kept thinking about his sister's beautiful lady-in-waiting.

Until one day, he was determined to approach Eunji, and the sweet Eunji opened a 'path' in her heart for Euijoo. Their closeness succeeded in building a secret relationship. They often met every night, whether it was in the garden behind the palace or Euijoo would sneak Eunji into his room and would take her back to her bedroom at four in the mornin.

In that relationship too, Eunji and Euijoo had sexual relations several times. They both gave up their virginity to each other. I don't know why Eunji dared to give up her virginity to Euijoo, even though Euijoo only gave her peace in the form of his promise to marry her.

By the way, today was an annoying day for Euijoo, his mother introduced him to a noble girl who was said to be very beautiful. The girl's name is Somi, who is Euijoo's distant cousin. Euijoo is not happy of course, especially since Somi is not his type. He sees Somi as a spoiled girl who will be troublesome if they get married. In front of the Emperor and Empress, Somi really looks cute, but when walking alone with Euijoo, that girl's spoiled side is really annoying.

Eunji walked behind Hajoon who also accompanied his brother to accompany his future fiancé. Eunji felt painful seeing Somi holding Euijoo tightly as if they were a newly married couple. Eunji also admitted that Somi was very suitable to be Euijoo's future empress, they had equal dignity. As for her? She was included in Euijoo's class of mistresses, because she had sex with Euijoo outside of marriage.

Euijoo occasionally looked back to see Eunji. Eunji smiled faintly at Euijoo, which actually made Euijoo feel very depressed. Eunji should be the one in Somi's position, Eunji should be the one who will be his fiancee, not the spoiled girl who is now holding him like a stamp.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You will be engaged to her tomorrow," Euijoo immediately looked at his mother, Empress Hwara when he suddenly said that. Eunji, who was serving food to Hajoon, was also shocked when she heard this.

"Mama, it's a rush, I don't know her better yet," Euijoo looked for an excuse, but his mother denied it. "You can get to know each other better after getting engaged, what's wrong with getting engaged?" Hwara raised her eyebrows seeing Euijoo who was not enthusiastic.

"Your mother is right, Euijoo. The sooner the better, people definitely like Somi, she's kind and sweet, right?" Jiho smiled teasingly at Euijoo which made Euijoo shudder because the words 'kind and sweet' were very far from Somi.

"Fuck! I have to save my relationship with Eunji!" Euijoo screamed in his heart, because he only wanted Eunji to be his future empress, not another girl.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Highness stop it!"

"I won't stop it!"

Euijoo thrust his cock with brutal movements into Eunji's wet pussy. The sex this time was really rough, because initially Eunji had refused to have any more sexual relations with Euijoo, and was even about to end their relationship. This resulted in Euijoo going berserk and forcing Eunji to have sex with him. Euijoo didn't want to lose Eunji.

"Highness stop it, you already have a fiancé," Hearing those words made Euijoo kiss Eunji's lips wetly. He wrapped Eunji's neck with his right hand. "She's not my fiancé, you're my fiancé, Eunji!" Euijoo said with a growl that sounded full of lust.

Eunji was speechless as Euijoo strangled her neck, pleasure and guilt uniting inside her. Several times he clenched, which made Euijoo dizzy because he was being squeezed by her pussy.

"Yeah you like that? You're ambitious about make me a daddy, eh?" Euijoo grinned with his girl's pussy action that made his dick in heaven. "Gonna you a mommy, impregnate you so that nothing can separate me from you," Euijoo said with great hunting desire. Eunji's eyes turned white from the pleasure she was experiencing, Euijoo really made her fly even though she felt guilty.

"Juju~"

Eunji whined calling Euijoo's nickname, making Euijoo grin. "Yeah, darling? Do you want something? Use your words,"

"G-g-gonna cum, please. Gonna-" Eunji couldn't continue her words, this time her pussy really clenched around Euijoo's cock.

"Gonna cum, baby? I wanna cum to. Together, yeah?" Euijoo was panting because she also felt himself at the end. In several thrusts, Eunji squirted profusely, but Euijoo did not pull out his cocok, letting Eunji's squirting fluid wet his cock which was also shooting his babies into Eunji's womb.

Eunji and Euijoo were both panting, Euijoo brushed his hair back with his fingers, not yet removing hid dick from Eunji's wet hole. Then he saw Eunji panting beneath him with her chest heaving, Euijoo smiled then gently stroked his beloved girl's hair, then gave a wet kiss to her soft lips.

"You will be in my room until morning really comes, I will not take you to your room again at four in the morning," Euijoo hugged Eunji gently, which he said was a plan.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"EUIJOO!" Eunji immediately woke up from her sleep when she heard Hwara's hysterical screams. Eunji glared when she realized that she had actually woken up in Euijoo's room and was still naked, only covered by Euijoo's blanket.

PART 2

[equallyshaw]

winter blues- cale makar

Warnings:depression and feelings of isolation. kinda choppy.

Word Count: 2.3+k

────────────

brianna hadn't been feeling right for over a month now, something she knew very well. she hadn't felt this way since her time in college, after she left home. now being here full time in denver, messed with her even more. she didn't know anybody, she still hadn't received a job offer and she was far from her family in new york city.

her and cale met her their first year away at college, though she went to boston univeristy while he went to umass. their first year was spent going back and fourth either between friends car's or train rides. then when cale left their second year, everything crumbled for her. she fell out of touch with her sorority so she quit, and that meant she lost her friends. and she didn't have cale who could pop over on a train, and vist with her. he was away in denver, following his dreams so he never saw the sad and isolated girl.

brianna sat up in bed, with the lights off and only her phone lighting up here and there. she wiped her tear stained cheeks once more, before sniffling. all the worst case scenarios played out in her mind. just like before. it was now december 18th, and that meant she and cale would be celebrating their first christmas with both of their families at the condo they moved into at the beginning of the season. a fresh start, for both of them. but together. she had tossed and turned all day, trying to nap but couldn't. she put the afternoon game on in the background, not following along or paying attention. she laid there listening but not being able to comprehend. the boys had made it back just in time for their home game there afternoon. the boys had a delay from chicago to denver, because of snow. so she hadn't seen cale in 9 days. further adding to her isolation.

unbenknowst to brianna, mel had been worried. mel hadn't been able to stay in constant connection with brianna. none of the other wags were able to really get ahold of her either. they were rightfully worried. mel had left mid way through the 3rd period to go check up on the young girl. she left the kids with ej's fiance and headed out into the winter afternoon. brianna shut her eyes, and felt her heart racing. she knew it was bad, but didn't realize it was that bad. she had been pushing the growing feelings away, for some time. she thought if she kept distracting herself or pushing it away, it would go away. but it came back stronger each time. and she could no longer push it away.

Her phone buzzed with a text, and she peered over seeing it was mel. she was let up from the front desk, as her and gabe were frequent visitors with the kids. she groaned as she got up, feeling her joints crack from being in bed all day. she rubbed her eyes as she walked to the front door. she opened it and saw mel who looked highly concerned. mel looked up and saw the young girl's exhausted eyes, one's that held secrets and little to no words to say them. "Bri-" Mel said the girl tried to shut the door. Mel's foot got caught up in the door, and Brianna sighed walking away. "Hey babes.."Mel trailed off, as she shut the door. The apartment was a mess. Usually the tidy and clean apartment was no longer that. The kitchen was cluttered with starbucks cups, starbucks breakfast bags, target items she picked up after a 3 am shopping spree. Mel took in the living room that had pillows and blankets sprewed about. Atleast the place smelled good, she thought. Brianna's candle liking, was coming in handy.

Mel followed Brianna to her bedroom, and could barely make out the figure in the bed. "Oh honey." Mel said and sat on the bed, rubbing the girl's back as she sobbed. "What's wrong? What's happenening?" Mel questioned as she finally got the girl to sit up. Brianna broke down more, feeling overwhelemed. "Oh my god, he's gonna be here soon. I have to clean!" She said jumping up and tying her hair into a messy bun. "No no no. I am going to clean up, you go shower. ok? Take all the time in the world, ok?" Mel said going into mom mode. Brianna dropped her hands and sighed, before nodding. Mel watched as Brianna walked into the washroom, and then as soon as she heard the shower turn on- she walked into the kitchen. She lit a candle, and began to clean.

50 minutes later, Cale walked through the door and saw Mel at the kitchen counter. She was on her phone, texting away to Gabe and EJ's fiance. "Hey....Mel." Cale said unsurely, and Mel turned and gave him a grave smile. "What are you doing here? Is Bri ok?" He asked setitng down his bags at the door and taking off his shoes. She shook her head, looking towards the hallway. "No...that's why I left the game. I couldn't get ahold of her after we had made plans to go to the game together." Mel explained, "And I haven't really been able to get ahold of her for over a month." She added. Cale nodded, unsure what to make of the situation. "She's severely depressed Cale and im really scared. I came in here to a kitchen filled with starbucks, the living room trashed and your bedroom a mess. I made her take a shower, clean up and take a nap. I changed your sheets too...because I didn't know when the last time she changed them was." Mel finished and Cale swallowed. He looked down, trying to process his emotions. He looked back up with tears in his eyes, "How'd I miss this?" He asked leaning against the wall. Mel shook her head, "It's not your fault. She's been maniac for a bit. You wouldn't have been able to tell." She said trying to comfort him. He nodded, clearing his throat. "Let me know if you need anyhting else, ill have my phone tonight." She said putting her purse on, and he nodded. "Thanks Mel." He said giving her a quick hug before shutting the door behind her.

cale made his way into the master bedroom, and saw brianna on her phone. he saw how exhausted she looked, the under eye bags that were apparent. he softly knocked no the door, and her gaze fluttered towards the door. nausea instantly made its way into her system. she frowned, biting her lip trying to control her tears. "hey hun..." cale said softly, walking and sitting down on the bed. she set down her phone and stared at him. she swallowed nervously, and he could see the nerves radiating through her body. "are you ok? why didn't you say something?" he asked, and she looked down sobbing. "im so-sorry." she sobbed, wrapping her arms around her chest. cale pulled her forward into his arms, kissing her head. "shh, it's ok. im here, i promise." he repeated over and over again for the next ten minutes. her breathing grew slower, her body radiating with energy again. she looked up at cale, him growing nervous. "i-i need to go home. i want my mom, my sister, i need them." she said, pleading. he nodded, pulling her in again and kissing her head. he knew, she needed to go home.

.・゜゜・

6 days later, brianna was waking up in her childhood bedroom as a light snow shower was happening outside. her mom walked in and smiled, carrying hot coffee and breakfast. "b, good morning love." she said sitting next to her in bed and getting under the comforter. "hey mom." she said softly, taking a sip of coffee. "have you told him?" her mom asked, and brianna knew exactly what she meant. she meant the time in college. "no, but I know I need to. im nervous that he will look at my differently, like im a risk. like if he leaves me for periods of time, ill break. ill fall apart." she rambled. her mom wrapped an arm around her, and shook her head. "that boy is head over heels, has been since the first thanksgiving you brought him home to us." she explained and brianna nodded, softly. she shrugged, "i guess." she said monotoned. "ill come grab you in a bit." her mom hummed after a few minutes. she walked out of the room, leaving her daughter for a bit. brianna ate her food, and drank her coffee. she didn't want to reach out to cale yet, he would be busy with his family in denver. she didn't want to disrupt him.

it was around 6pm when brianna walked downstairs and was greeted by her mom, dad, 2 sisters and brother as well as their partners. "the younglin has graced us with her presence." her oldest sister joked and everybody laugh while brianna rolled her eyes. "hi to you too." she smirked pushing her oldest sister a bit. they were all making their ways to the diing room table, when the doorbell went off. they all looked at one another, not looking at brianna. she sighed, "ill grab." she said standing up and walking towards the hallway. she saw somebody with their back facing the door and she squinted trying to get an idea of who it might be. she opened the door, and the tall man turned around.

it was cale. his ever red cheeks, even redder in the snowstorm. he stood their with hopeful eyes, a cheeky smile dawning his pale skin. her lips parted, as she looked at the man she has loved for so long. "oh my god." she smiled, and stood on her toes to hug him. he wrapped his arms around her lower back and lifted her off the ground a few inches. she unclasped her arms from him, and pulled him inside. he shut the door behind him, and she took his coat from him without missing a beat. "come come." she beamed, pulling him into the dining room. a chorus of cheers erupted, met with hugs and whispers exchanged. cale sat down next to brianna, and took hold of her hand, sharing a smile with the girl he loved.

.・゜゜・

it was 5 am the next morning and brianna was up already making coffee. she wasn't able to sleep that evening, she was somewhat on a 'high', she had so much restless energy now that cale was here. you could also call her maniac, that would work too. cale softly walked down the stairs, trying to find brianna. he saw the kitchen light on, and the sound of the keurig. he softly smiled, as brianna noticed that he was there. she stopped what she was doing, and gave him an uneasy smile. "what are you doing up?" she questioned, pouring some creamer in the coffee. he softly chuckled leaning on the counter, "i was gonna ask the same thing." he mused and she giggled. "i couldn't sleep." she said truthfully blowing on the coffee. he came around the counter and wrapped his arms around her. "please tell me what's going through that pretty head of yours.." he said softly, gazing into her eyes. she set down her coffee and gave him her full attention. "i uh..i havent been completely honest about everything." she paused, looking at his chest. he nodded for her to continue, "so when you um left for denver, i got really behind in school. i got sick which landed me in the hospital, then i ended up dropping greek- which you know about but i got very very depressed. i had to go home every weekend for three months, just so i could be home with my parents and friends. but it was hard for me to go to class, i slept most of the time when not doing work or attending class. i had to quit my job midway through the year because of how bad it was. and-" she paused sniffling, "it's bad like it was then. its back even though ive been pushing it away trying to act like, it's not happening. im frustrated because of how much i still go to therapy, and like-" she paused sniffling again, "ive scared a lot of people in my life these past few years, and i just didn't want to scare you cale." she paused looking up at him. she saw tears in his eyes, his cheeks flushed with panic. "i never told you because of how much traveling you did and didnt want you to worry and freak out while you were away. and i never wanted you to think i was broken." she finished. "and im sorry for that." she quickly added and he nodded.

he shook his head pulling her into his chest and kissing her head. "you are more than okay. im not upset at all. i understand, and never worry about freaking me out or making me worry." he began, he cupped her cheeks and stared into her eyes as he said the next part, "never ever think that you are too broken or feel like you need to hide from me. ok? i don't care if i need to fly home at any point, i don't care if i need to take time away-" she cut him off, freaking out. "no no dont say that cale." she said shaking her head. "brianna, i love you. you are my number one priority, you are my life. the reason i find joy in the little things. the reason why i put up with crappy reality tv, the reason why i remember to wear my contacts and glasses. brianna rose, you over everything else. everytime." he said slowly tracing her undereyes. she nodded softly, smiling. she was in love with this man, and had waited years for him to say those words. "i love you, and will for the rest of my life." he smiled, his dimples popping. he saw the 'understanding' look in her eyes and she gasped. he smiled nodding, "just you wait brianna rose." he mused pulling her in for a kiss.

.・゜゜・

aaaaaand i hope you guys enjoyed :)

[creepypastalover97]

Ok time for another creepypasta au headcannon

Today’s headcannon is going to be about everyone’s favorite link rip-off

Enjoy

. The correct way of spelling his name is BEN_drowned. But his Real name is Benjamin Lawman

. BEN was born on April 23rd 1990, and he died on September 7th 2002

. He’s pale and in the body of a boy around 12. But Mentally he’s much older, and would have been 32 years old if he hadn't died.

. In a weird way he’s happy he died. he didn’t have to be apart of the cruel world today. Ben’s disgusted with modern people

“Why does someone’s sexuality matter when the earth’s fucking melting?

Why is racism a thing it was all hundreds of years ago calm the fuck down people!”- Ben

. The only thing he appreciates is modern technology. Games, consoles and chatrooms keep him busy and happy. He’ll often make staged accounts on sites and just talk to people, be there for him

. ben’s addicted too bitcoin he thinks its the future of the world. doesn’t care if he’s fuckin dead

he’s considered communism

.Was deathly afraid of water like Finn in Adventure Time. Strictly takes showers and doesn’t go swimming

. BEN doesn’t give a single fuck about his gender. This was discovered by Jeff a day after BEN arrived at the mansion. Jeff, being the rude ass motherfucker he is, decided to try and make fun of BEN by calling him “a pretty girl”. he was so fucking shook when BEN just answered with

“Thanks I appreciate it”- BEN

EJ, who was sitting in the kitchen like he always is, fucking lost it

. BEN was once dared to dress up as a female, like a dress and hair up

He did it without hesitation

Everyone who was attracted to girls regretted it immediately after seeing him

. Bisexual asf but leans more towards girls

. He can do voice acting and like, really good impersonations. He once hid in the vents and started laughing in a perfect Freddy Fazbear imitation and later he started speaking in Baby’s voice and gave half the mansion a heart attack

. he secretly has a Tik Tok account where he pretends to be a ”””gamergirl”””

He’s famous

. He smokes weed when he starts glitching out really bad to calm down his nerves. He relies on weed to calm him down if he finds himself getting anxiety or feeling depressed to keep himself from glitching out horribly.

. Hardcore Gamer. will demolish anyone in any game ever. Jeff thought he could beat him at dance party because he’s so lazy but oh was he wrong

. Referencing the C-D-I Zelda games in his prescence will cause BEN to go into a homicidal rage.

. Often goes to arcades to fuck with people and occasionally cheat.

. Is so fucking good at Laser Tag - he’ll no scope everyone without breaking a sweat

. Very glitchy pervy boy. Has gone to sex shops only to “accidentally” make all the display vibrators lose their shit just for kicks, and has smacked almost every Pasta in the mansion with an oversized rubber dildo

. Doesn’t cut his hair. (The girl pastas like styling his hair)

. Sees Sally as a little sister

. Ben cannot physically cook. He’s the Meliodas of cooking. It looks great but tastes really bad. He’s more worried about presentation over taste. He knows that Chef Ramsey would kill him too for how bad he cooks.

. His ears twitch when ever he’s focused or nervous. (Especially when he’s lying)

. ben’s gotta sleep with pads on his face so he doesn’t fuck up his sheets

. Although Ben is pretty colorful as a person, when he’s upset and/or angry, everything on him goes monochrome

. When he gets sick, he glitches horribly when he sneezes

. Glitches really bad when he’s physically upset

. If BEN laughs hard enough he will cough up a ton of water that's in this lungs from when he drowned

. Prefer’s to levitate everywhere, he walks only when he’s super energetic (which is never)

. actually has no fucking idea what he is, it’s like

“Hey BEN what exactly are you?”- Circe

“a ghost???? Wait,,, a hylian. A…. human?? Idfk”- BEN

the ultimate meme lord. Actually funny which in itself is kinda scary

“So here’s the tea”- BEN

“ for the last time, it’s called a mission report “-slenderman

“ do you want to hear the tea or not?”- BEN

“Hmpff”-Circe

. Ben is fluent in Chinese.

. His diet consist of energy drinks and instant noodles

. He hates a lot of fruits for some reason. He's not unhealthy, he just never eats fruit

. Has a habit of chewing on electric cords.

. Jokingly simps for Jeff as a joke, because he likes Jeff’s reactions.

. He adores the Fnaf series and knows the lore.

. he actually goes outside sometimes???

“Oooh!! Look at the sun, it’s so circular! So warm! And bright.” - BEN, leaving his room for the first time in three weeks

“…………”- BEN

[Takes a 180 and goes back inside to hibernate]

. BEN can only climb into devices that are plugged in, sure if you charge your phone he can get in but if you unplug it his only way to get out is to either wait or climb through the screen.

. He also thinks Basil is pathetic.

He hates Basil.

. Ben doesn't like musicals, Hamilton is the ONLY exception

. he’s so laid back that everyone forgets his manipulative and sadistic nature

“BEN that’s inappropriate clothing go change”- slenderman

“I’m inappropriately dressed to live anyway bitch why would I”- BEN

. he has so much stuffed animals, pillows and blankets god couldn’t. he’s too emotionally unstable to actually cuddle anyone so he replaces human contact with fluffy pillows and blankets

. Won’t stop quoting vines to the point where it’s annoying

. Makes “cringe” prank videos when bored

. is actually really good at hiding his emotions, no one really knows what he’s truly like. Or so he thinks

“BEN, are you alright?”- Circe

“Yeah, why?”- BEN

“Because you asked the lady in the store if the damage repair shampoo works on emotions too.”- Circe

. He likes to hack into the SCP Foundation’s private computers and spam them with outdated memes and 24 hour long loops of the “song of unhealing”.

. Often hacks everyone’s phones and switching Siri with himself. Then the pastas freak the fuck out when they find out it’s him. Jeff hates this the most.

“ Siri, connect redtube to start bar”- jeff

“ oh?, does jeffy boy have a nasty watch history? Wow, buddy you have more kinks than Masky, damn”-BEN

“ how would you know?”- jeff

“…….”-BEN

“……”-jeff

“Get out of my phone”- jeff

. inhumanly flexible. Anyone who enters his room debates on wether or not to call an exorcist.

. Actually is really fucking smart but likes having people underestimate him so he can purposely destroy their ego

. Short boy that will chop down legs if anyone makes fun of his height

“What are you, three?”- BEN

“Yeah, three heads taller than you.”- jeff

“………………”- BEN

Ten minutes later

“OPEN THE DOOR YOU FUCKING COWARD!”- BEN, banging on Jeff’s door

“I WAS JUST JOKING!”- jeff

Overall BEN_drowned is no doubt actually a very nice and understanding guy (apart from, well, killing)

I hope you enjoyed

P.s. not everything is canon. So don’t take seriously if you don’t want to. If you don’t like, take it somewhere else. Thank you

Bye 👋🏻

P.s.s. Go check out Circe’s origin story on archive of our own. It’s called rabbits are not what they seen.

[sankta-starkova]

LETTERMAN

033; the woman in the woods

previous chapter | next chapter | masterlist

summary: the one where ej and andy get to spend time together in the camp until the production gets in the way, threatening to ruin their summer and relationship

wordcount: 1.7k

Gina ran up to the girls cabin, opening the door and squealing, "The cast list has been posted," she exclaimed.

Everyone jumped up, pulling dressing gowns and robes over themselves as they ran outside.

Andy could feel her stomach doing flips. She was horrified at the result of the cast list and was so excited to see who she got, or who she didn't get.

Her and Kourtney got there first, both turning to each other and yelling out in joy when they realised what they got. Andy was Anna and Kourtney got Elsa.

"I didnt know your voices could even reach that register," Ricky said and they moved out of the way, allowing Carlos and Ricky to see the sign.

"Look at that bestie, Kristoff and Anna," Andy said, placing her hand on Ricky's shoulder.

He pulled her in for a hug, congratulating her on the role.

They had been drifting apart since the Lily incident but he still cared about her and vice versa. They were best friends, first and foremost

Carlos scoffed as he looked at his name on the list, "first lumiere and now Olaf, am I destined to play an intimate object for eternity," He said, folding his arms across his chest.

Ashlyn and Gina walked up to the sign, both looking back with sad expressions.

"The ensemble?" Ashlyn questioned before putting on a fake smile, "I mean hey, the ensemble, can't do a show without the ensemble,"

EJ walked through the group, "Okay, everyone calm down, let's all be professional about it," he said, walking over.

"I will be taking any photos of him in antlers for blackmail purposes," Ashlyn said, not realising that he didn't know he got a part yet.

"What are you talking about?" He asked, looking down at Andy as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders.

"Congrats Sven," she said and he chuckled, looking down at her with a nervous smile.

"Sven!" He exclaimed, shocked. Then his eyes trailed to her name.

His face lit up as he turned to her and he leaned down, hands on either side of her face as he pressed a kiss against her lips.

"Babe, that's amazing! Anna!" He was grinning ear to ear, knowing she deserved it

Everyone was talking on top of each other, nerves running high in the area.

"Quiet your voices," Maddox said and everyone turned to look at her, "It's newbie intiation camp out night folkes. A night in the woods amongst the wildlife and spirits,"

She walked off, leaving the others to think about everything.

"Congrats, now I think we should all get changed," EJ joked and everyone realised they were still in their pyjamas.

After they had headed back to their cabins and gotten dressed for the day, Andy brushed her hair out, tying it up in the mirror.

"Are you okay?" Gina asked Ashlyn as she heard the girl tear out a page from her book.

"A hundred percent, just jouralling," Ashlyn said but they could all hear the tension in her voice, "Reframing the news from this morning so I can make it a win,"

Maddox nodded her head, "Oh, I get it, you're a Leo rising," she said, looking up at Ashlyn.

Her head whipped towards Maddox as she scoffed, "Capricorn rising actually. I'm all Earth and air signs in my big three,"

Maddox shrugged, "Really? I totally got fire signs from you," she admitted and Ashlyn started rambling in annoyance.

Andy started talking to Maddox about the campfire when they heard the window blinds rattle. They all turned to see EJ poking his head through the window.

The girls voices overlapped in annoyance, boys were prohibited in the cabin, and Andy jumped up, looking at her boyfriend.

"I'm sorry, I just need to talk to Andy for a sec," he said in protest, "Pretty please,"

Maddox rolled her eyes in a feigned annoyance, "You've got two minutes rocketman," she said.

He thanked her before pulling his head from the window and rushing to the door, walking in, holding a bouquet of wildflowers in his hand.

"Sorry to barge in," he said, pressing a kiss to her cheek, "I knew you'd get the lead, you're a star babe,"

She started rambling about something and when she finished the two fell into a comfortable silence.

She turned to look at him and Andys face contorted into one of confusion as she saw his brows creased together and his eyes trained on her hands.

"Are you okay EJ?" She asked when she turned to him, realising he had a vacant expression on his face.

"Sorry, I'm just freaking out a little bit. Corbin Bleu is coming back tomorrow for our first read through with his camera crew, I've got to break down the script tonight," he explained.

Andy smiled, "I know you're worried but tonight's gonna be this big fun night and it'll take your mind off it for a while," she said, placing her hand on his shoulder reassuringly.

"Ding ding, two minutes EJ," Maddox said, cutting in.

"Thank you for the flowers, and EJ, you're gonna kill it tomorrow okay," she said, pressing a kiss to his cheek before shooing him out of the cabin.

After an afternoon of fun and games, the sun had set and everyone was getting ready for the campfire.

Andy walked out of her tent before spotting EJ hunched over the table, "Hey Mr director, what you working on?" She asked as she walked over, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"Just the read through, I'm probably not going to make it to the campfire," he explained.

Andy groaned, she wanted to spend time with him and Corbin Bleu lumping him with this job had ruined it.

"Come on baby, I'm gonna get scared and need someone to cuddle up to," she said, half joking and half serious.

EJ laughed, the first time he'd laughed in a while, "Okay then, but just for the song and story," he said, holding his pinky finger out.

"Deal," Andy said, linking her finger with his before grabbing his arm and dragging him over to the campfire.

"Welcome folks to your first newbie intiation campout night," Maddox said as EJ and Andy sat down, the two sharing a blanket as she leant her head on his shoulder.

Everyone else piled in, sitting down on logs of wood. Andy watched as Ricky came in and sat with Gina and how Jet was close behind the two.

"Now let's give it up for our very own rocket man," Maddox said, passing him a guitar as he moved away from Andy to get a comfortable stance.

"This one is called the ballad of shallow lake and every word is true," he said in a spooky voice, raising his eyebrows.

He played a spooky song about a girl called Susan fine who went missing in shallow lake and her ghost haunts the camp.

Andy watched in awe, clapping her hands loudly at the end. She loved it whenever he'd sing and would never get bored of the sound.

"Um, is that a real story?" Kourtney asked, a horrified look on her face.

"I've got some homework to do but the amazing Maddox will explain it all," EJ said as he got up.

"EJ," Andy said, not expecting him to leave so quickly, "You don't want to stay for the story?"

"I'm sorry Andy, you know I've got tons to do," he said, looking down at her, not noticing the disappointment on her face.

She faked a smile as she watched him walk off. She loved that he was getting his moment in the spotlight as the director but she really wished he'd spend more time with her doing simple camp things like campfires.

"Lets see, who here likes ghost stories?" Maddox asked before everyone began to cheer.

She explained the story, freaking everyone out until Jet ruined it by making jokes, causing Maddox to storm out.

After the ghost story they all headed back to their tents. Andy was sharing a tent with Ashlyn and Gina.

Ashlyn and Gina decided to go explore the forest and Andy walked off to the tent where EJ was staying, the light still on despite how late it was.

She walked in, "You need any help Eej, don't want you falling asleep at the table," she joked, placing her hands on his shoulders and gently massaging them.

He groaned before leaning back, placing his head on her chest as he looked up at her, "Yeah, I've got it handled, thanks though," he said.

She pulled up a chair, sitting down next to him, "I can keep you company," she suggested, "I didn't mention it earlier but you sounded super good on the guitar,"

"Thanks but I've really got to get this gone before tomorrow when Corbin gets here, Corbin Bleu," he said, clearly wound up about something but Andy didnt notice.

She chuckled, hand coming to rest on his bicep, "I'm fine with helping, I can afford to miss some beauty sleep," she said jokingly, trying to get rid of some of the tension.

"I'm fine Andy," he said, raising his voice. His sudden outburst startled Andy and she stood up

She had never heard him raise his voice at her before and although she knew it was because of the stress of the play, it still hurt.

His eyes went wide as he realised what he'd done. For the first time in his life, he had felt a bit like his father, yelling at his mum when she did one thing wrong.

"No, Ands, baby, I'm sorry," he held his hand out, trying to get her to stay. He didn't mean to yell.

"No, no, it's okay Caswell, I get it, you clearly don't need my help," she said before turning away and walking out of the tent.

He jumped up, rushing towards the door of the tent to chase after her, "Andy!" He called out.

She just ignored him as she walked into her tent, zipping it up. Her and EJ never really fought, so to see him speak to her like that was out of character.

He groaned out of frustration, pinching the bridge of his nose, "God damn it," he exclaimed before turning back to the table and sitting down, his head on his hands

Taglist:

@maggiecc @hesfasttandshesweird

[taking-shots]

broken walls | n. mackinnon (18+)

warnings: this is literally pure filth, idk what else u want me to say

word count: 769 (this was also not proofread in the slightest so pls don’t come for me)

a note from the author: boy oh boy have i been saving this one for a rainy day. i hope u enjoy this as much as i did besties <33

it’s about half past 2:00AM the night of the downtown parade when you and nate finally stumble into his front door.

he’s had too many beers to count, and ej managed to make him take god only knows how many shots of tequila. you’re not so innocent either; the amount of truly’s you had would send a sorority girl into kidney failure, and cale would only take shots if you agreed to too, not to mention the mimosas you, mel, and ashley consumed at breakfast this morning. you don’t know much by this point, but you are for sure horny and so is your boyfriend. the more alcohol he consumed, the more touchy-feely he got, which was extremely rare for his stoic personality.

by the time you left everyone, nate had started full on making out with you while grabbing a handful of your ass. on the ride home, he kept slotting his hand between your thighs, which made you grateful you had chosen the denim shorts to wear this morning instead of the white skirt you originally picked out. your uber drive was young, and he didn’t need to see the avs’ star centre fingering his girlfriend in the backseat. he was already getting a show enough because of nate’s nipping and sucking on your neck and jawline only when you had to pull away from lips to breathe. fast forward to actually getting inside nate’s luxury home, he throws you on the bed and quickly strips himself of the sweat and alcohol champion t-shirt. everything is normal up until his cock is finally freed.

“baby,” he moans, rubbing himself through your soaking lips. “get inside me.” you whine, bucking your hips forward in an attempt to finally feel the familiar feeling of nate deep inside you. “look at me, please.” he practically begs, keeping one hand on his weeping cock. you open your eyes and look at the man in front of you. he’s practically in tears, but you’re not sure from what. “hey, nate, what’s wrong, baby?” you ask concerned, immediately sitting up and softly cupping his cheek. “we don’t have to do anything, we can just go to bed.” nate automatically melts in your touch and relaxes. “no, it’s not that.” he sniffles. “i just…can you…can you just take care of me, please? just for tonight, i promise-“ he starts to ramble and apologize, but you quickly cut him off by pressing your lips onto his.

you kiss him for a moment before gently taking his hand off himself and softly stroking it with your own. he breaks apart from your mouth, nearly releasing right there in your hand. “i’ve got you, sweet boy.” you assure him. “lay back for me.” nate wastes no time in complying, getting comfortable on his side of the bed. “whatever you need, you tell me, yeah?” you tell him softly, straddling him. he nods his head but doesn’t say anything, too focused on how his tip is just begging to inserted inside your soft, warm cunt. “nathan.” you tell him firmly, making his blue eyes look into yours. “tell me you understand.” he knows that you won’t let him inside until he verbally acknowledges what you said. “yeah. yes, i understand.” he tells you.

you slowly sink down on his thick shaft, taking it inch by inch, not used to the feeling of being on top. once your pubic bone is resting at his base, you place your hands on his shoulders to steady yourself. you stay like that for a moment, thinking about your next move. you’ve been on top for with a few of your exes, but this was different; it wasn’t just about riding him. he needed to know how loved by and special he was to you - he needed to feel it. “you feel so good, baby.” you sigh, beginning to move your hips. “my champion…no one deserves it like you do.” your words were having an affect on nate something serious as his eyes were screwed shut, and his hands gripped the sheet so hard you thought they would rip at any moment.

you knew this wouldn’t last much longer. in fact, you probably wouldn’t even get an orgasm tonight, and that’s was okay with you. nate struggled so much to let people in and tell them how he really felt, so the fact that he finally felt safe enough to ask you what he had obviously wanted for a while now was pleasure enough for you. (besides, you knew nate would undoubtedly wake you up tomorrow with the best morning head.)

[homemade-ghosts]

Can you give your thoughts on the PW couch scene in Season 2, please? A lot of PWs try to make it out to seem that that scene had major communication in it and I wonder how they could think that? It was mostly EJ voicing his stresses like he usually does and Gina giving him her input on the situation. Even if they did communicate well in that scene hypothetically, that's just ONE scene out of so many other scenes that they haven't been able to actually communicate well in, in other scenarios.

Like most of 2b, I hadn't seen this scene since the episode dropped, so I had to go back into the dark (literally, no one paid their electric bills in s2, I swear) depths of s2 to watch it again. & truthfully? It’s not as bad as I remember.

I know you asked for my thoughts on the couch scene specifically, but I hope it’s okay if I have a little compare/contrast moment because, to me, the major significance of this scene is that it’s is in direct opposition to Gina’s scene with Ricky on Valentine’s Day. Gina seeks Ricky out, she shows up at his apartment for comfort because, despite the unspoken tension between them, Ricky is Gina’s person. He’s the one she, by her own admission, tells things she doesn’t tell anyone else. It’s a purposeful action, Gina came to see Ricky and only Ricky because he’s the one who understands her — but EJ coming to see Gina is completely accidental. He actually came to talk to Ashlyn and only settles for Gina when she tells him that Ash isn’t home at the moment. EJ even, weirdly enough, seemed to have forgotten Gina even lives with Ashlyn (the first thing he says when Gina opens the door is, “hey, what’re you doing here?” and she has to remind him that she does, in fact, live here). Whereas Gina knew exactly where to find Ricky because, even though he neglected to tell his own girlfriend that he had moved out of his childhood home and into a smaller apartment, he told Gina and gave her the address. 

I think what really stands out to Gina though, is that even though EJ didn’t show up specifically for her, he still showed up. The last time we saw Gina open that door, there was no one on the other side. Just a box of chocolates she mistakenly thought were from the guy who gets her. & every other time before that, Gina was always knocking on Ricky’s door. I think it felt good for her to be on the other side for once, the one answering the door to a friendly face. 

Now, onto the actual “couch” part of the couch scene. I think there’s a genuine attempt at understanding each other here, but the keyword is “attempt.” Gina can guess that EJ turned down the Duke offer because he didn’t earn it, but they lack any sense of commonality to go deeper than that. Gina doesn’t know what it’s like to be that privileged, to be rewarded based on status and not merit. She’s the girl who never quits, who keeps pushing, when she gets something it’s always because she’s earned it. When EJ tells Gina, “…my entire life has been mapped out for me for as long as I can remember, you know?” She smiles, but replies, “Not really. I’m always one natural disaster away from landing in a new place.” and there it is again, that lack of commonality. EJ doesn’t know what it’s like to crave stability because that’s all he’s ever known. To EJ’s credit, he does ask what that’s like for her, but when she tells him that it’s both stressful and freeing, that she doesn’t “worry about the future because she can’t control it” (hearing her say that knowing she would tell EJ she was trying to build a future with him almost a full season later kind of broke my heart. EJ truly has no concept of how much of a breakthrough it is for Gina to be able to think about the future because his whole life has been about his family planning his future). After he asks though, it never goes deeper than that. He brushes it off (maybe because he doesn’t understand?) and instead, turns the conversation in a different direction with, “Well, you always seem to know what you want.” Which had nothing to do with what Gina just told him and everything to do with himself. He came here to talk things out, to try to figure out what he wants and he was projecting onto Gina, effectively saying that he wished he knew what he wanted. Gina opens up to him, or tries to, and he trivializes it, turns the conversation back to him and what he’s thinking.

Their back-and-forth, on the surface, can seem mutual — but in retrospect, it feels like a small preview of what’s to come. You have Gina supporting EJ, telling him that, when she looks at him, she sees the guy that bought her a plane ticket for Opening Night (EJ’s canonically rich so I still maintain that he’s the only one who could afford to buy her a last minute flight to SLC, not the only one who wanted to) and the guy who made a sweet birthday video for Carlos. Gina does her best to lift him up just like she will do at camp in s3 — but EJ doesn’t really give her anything back, except for telling her that she’s “one of the bravest people [he] knows” but it feels like a hollow complement because…honestly, what does he know? In s1, he basically only talked to her when it involved scheming and, at this point in s2, all he’s done is see her cry at Carlos’ party and pretend to be her boyfriend for 10 seconds when they went to North High. It’s a nice thing to say and it’s true, but it’s not personal or meaningful because what does he know about how brave she is? He doesn’t even really know her.

It reminded me a lot of Nini telling Gina that everyone is lucky to have her in their lives in the s2 finale, which, again, is absolutely true — but coming from someone who hasn’t really been in Gina’s life (she was at YAC & had spoken to Gina maybe once or twice since she got back) it just felt…empty. 

Ultimately, this scene makes two things very clear to me: 

1. Ricky & Gina need each other, specifically — EJ & Gina, however, both needed someone. In s2, Gina needed someone to show up for her in a way that Ricky couldn’t while he was with Nini and EJ needed someone to both reassure him about and distract him from his future. It didn’t have to be each other, but they happened to be in the same place and need someone at the same time. Don’t get me wrong, I believe EJ & Gina both developed genuine feelings for one another, but their entire relationship was born out of needing someone, anyone, to help them through a difficult personal time. Once they were both out of that vulnerable state, there was nothing left to connect them.

2. I can see how the couch scene seems like good communication on the surface: EJ & Gina engage with one another, they listen and they try to see where the other is coming from…but they don’t relate to each other in any way. They don’t understand each other. & can communication really mean anything if you don’t understand the person you’re trying to communicate with? I don’t think so. 

3. It’s very odd the amount of pws who turn to this scene when they want to talk about how “bad” s3’s writing is, claiming that they really connected here, that it makes no sense for them to have, among other things, severe communication issues in s3 because this scene exists. This is the closest pw ever gets to decent communication and it still lacks any kind of mutual understanding + literally four episodes later, instead of talking to Gina, EJ breaks off their plans & avoids her. The only reason they even end up kissing by the end of the ep is because Ashlyn tells Gina what was going on. There was absolutely no communication between the two of them. The couch scene is quite literally the only time they both make a sincere attempt at communicating with each other.

[ohginas]

thoughts on 3x08

I love how they all had their moments! (Apart from Carlos but we love his comedic moments too)

This Is Me was 😭😭😭

Gina gets things done!!! (in reference to stopping Channing. She’s here for her girl Kourtney!!)

KOURTNEY SLAYED SLAYED SLAYED!!!! not that I’m surprised!!!

I wish we could’ve seen more of Gina being a lead!

And frankly more of the play overall. Like seeing Jet as Hans and Gina/Kourtney as Elsa/Anna. Even just through a montage

Kristoff’s Lullaby was so so so beautiful!! 🥹

Ahhhh Big Red and Ashlyn!!!! 🌈

What’s going to happen with EJ narratively?? I seriously wish they didn’t leave his story so open/unresolved but actually gave him some catharsis or payoff. We saw him stand up to his dad but we didn’t hear the response and what repercussions would come from that or what it would mean for him next year. Like big and wide open

Granted I loved his scene with Val

Also romantically speaking, in the very least, you can still have Rina happen and give EJ an emotional moment where he gets to process

Kourtney is a star!!! 🌟 she has an agent??

Such cute lil red carpet moments with Kourtney doing Carlos’ outfit and all of their little comments were so darling

I need to see Maddox and Jet in season 4 please!!! And EJ for that matter!!!

The development of how things happened this season with the love triangle was interesting but kudos to EJ for being a bigger person at the end

the Rina kiss !!! 🤍 here we come season 4!! I’m intrigued to see how this plays out!

I love how they redeemed Corbin and how he sort of recognized Miss Jenn!

The everyday song and montage were so so beautiful!!! 🥲

They should have done a final scene where we see Corbin dial up someone from the og cast (they don’t even have to show who) and just say something like “Hey, I think it’s time we all get back in this together” idk I just needed a more cliffhanging lead-in to hint to the next season!!! ❤️

[missroller15]

A very special date night

ok, here it finally is! I’m sorry about the delay but I got it finished and I’m actually pretty nervous to post this but here goes, I hope you all enjoy it <3333

________________________________________________________________

Finally.. It was date night. EJ and Gina couldn’t be more hyped to finally get their time together. 

Due to busy schedules (EJ in college and Gina with highschool, theater, etc.), time alone just got cut shorter and shorter. They decided enough was enough and planned for one day a month where they could both simply be together but of course, to make things a bit more interesting, one of them would choose the location while the other got to choose the meal or place to eat. 

This month, EJ was choosing where they’d go but the thing is… Gina truly had no clue what he could be planning. Usually, he’d drop a huge obvious hint but assume he didn’t just reveal but this time around, no hints or anything. 

The day finally came, a bright Friday afternoon. The sunlight beamed through Gina’s window as she yawned while stretching her arms out. Still in the process of waking up, she suddenly heard a buzz come from her phone.  

Hey, G. Sorry, I couldn't text sooner! I’m at the zoo with Big Red so I won’t be home most of today. Enjoy some of the breakfast saved in the fridge and get your game face ready for tonight with my cuz ;) 

Before Gina could respond, a second message came in putting a stop to all her suspicions. 

 And nope, can’t answer any questions! Anyways, have fuuuuun 

She let out a long sigh, so many questions rushing through her mind and the only way she could think of putting them to rest for the moment was by focusing on something else so the girl sluggishly got up and went to shower. 

 Once she was out, most of her impending questions had settled (not all were gone, to be clear though) and as she walked downstairs, yet another message came except not from Ash this time.

From EJ: Ready for one of the greatest date nights ever, babe? ;) 

A smile grew on her face as she headed to the door and found EJ waiting outside beside his car. He was leaning against it, specifically by the passenger side, most likely waiting for Gina to arrive so he could open the door for her like the incredible sweet boyfriend he is. Blush spread across her face as he noticed her coming out. 

“So, am I still not allowed to ask questions?” she joked once they were both sitting inside the car. 

“I mean, of course but this is gonna be an interesting date and honestly I’m curious to see your reaction without any ideas..” he explained as they drove. Gina raised an eyebrow but kept her thoughts to herself. While they sat in a comfortable silence, she started to try and contemplate where they could be going. The biggest hint she had was Ashlyn’s text but even then, with how vague it was, she still remained puzzled. 

Just then when they arrived, all that curiosity disappeared from her mind and she finally realized what she meant by getting her game face ready. They were about to play Laser Tag. 

As they walked in, she couldn’t help but already feel her adrenaline start to rush. She finally realized what Ash meant when she said to get her game face ready and Gina was going to do just that. 

The teams were selected by random and EJ already had their names filled out on the form so now all they had to do was wait for the announcer to begin calling out names. Gina and EJ anxiously but even more excitedly stood waiting for the announcement to come already with their hands interlocked. 

As they stood waiting, EJ leaned over to whisper something into Gina’s ear sending a chill down her back. “Just know, that if we’re on a different teams and I beat you, I will like you just the same as I do at this moment.” 

Gina scoffed at the comment and looked him dead in the eye, trying to stifle her laughter. “Don’t try to intimidate me, babe.. It’s not gonna change anything, I got my game face on now and it stays till I win.” 

He jokingly rolled his eyes at the snarky reply. Before he could respond, the announcer finally came on. 

“Ok ok ok, let’s do this! So excited to kick-off the first laser tag game of the day and as most of you already know how this goes, blah blah blah be safe. Once you’re hit, you’re done for a good ten minutes. Now anyways, now back to teams..” he quickly rambled. 

Gina glanced over at EJ who just gently squeezed her hand while they expectantly waited to hear the team names. 

“Alrighty then, let’s begin… for team red, EJ Caswell…” he started, considering the teams only consisted of six players for this round, it didn’t take long to name all the players and before they knew it, it was already time for the blue team. 

Since Gina’s name wasn’t called out for the red team, it was obvious she’d be a part of the blue team meaning that they were going to go against each other. To be honest, the idea of being able to hold the win over the other’s head enticed them both.. A lot more than they liked to admit.

The teams began to disperse and head to the main room for setting up. While in there, this time EJ shot a glance at Gina, who was zipping up her dark blue vest. She turned for a second to wink at him before returning her attention back to her team. 

EJ did the same and not too long after, the whispers and small talk went silent as everyone’s laser guns began beeping and flashing most likely because they were being turned on while the lights dimmed down. The announcer came on one last time soon after.  

“Players, prep time is over… the doors to the laser tag area are now unlocked and you may enter. Let the games begin.” 

Everyone immediately separated and went to find hiding spots. Gina immediately knew the second level was the place she needed to be. As she navigated through the dark space, something felt off… almost as if she felt a presence following behind her. 

“It’s probably just your nerves, don’t break focus”, Gina muttered under her breath. Soon enough, she began to turn a corner, that feeling came back again. She immediately began dashing and ended up finding a small pitch dark corner to hide in right by the stairs she was finding to the second level in the first place. 

Just as Gina thought, once she slipped behind the corner someone came not long after and it didn’t surprise her one bit who it was. 

“Aw man, I lost her.” EJ groaned in frustration. Gina bit the inside of her cheek to contain her laughter at seeing the poor green eyed boy mope. 

The fun ended though as he started to explore the area and he began getting dangerously close to her corner so she did the only reasonable thing a person would do if they felt threatened. 

While his back was turned, she took the opportunity and leaped onto his back. He immediately toppled over and Gina had the upper hand for the moment. Gina clapped her hand over his mouth before he could start yelling for help. 

“Shhh.. don’t fight it.” she whispered softly leaning in closer. Now she hadn’t planned for this part of the plan but he was right there.. one little peck wouldn’t do anything. 

As she slowly removed her hand from on top of his mouth, her body went into shock when he went in for the kiss. She didn’t even think twice once her brain started to function again and reciprocated. 

Her hand gently released its tight grip on the gun and Gina’s focus finally broke. They broke apart after about 30 seconds to take a breath but then Gina heard something that made her blood run cold. 

Her vest was beeping and so was her gun. 

She looked at EJ, who had a satisfied smirk resting on his face. “I thought you knew this, G. I play to win.” He said so while holding his red glowing gun up. 

Gina, shocked and possibly just a bit impressed, remained speechless. He played her at her own game and won?! Gina wasn’t gonna let this go, there was still a chance and she wasn’t going to waste it. 

In the ten minutes that Gina was out, EJ knew she would be out to get him and only him. He played an extremely dangerous move by playing Gina like that but it’s obviously what she was planning for him so if anything, at least she’ll know now that he knows most of the tricks up her sleeve. 

What scares him though is what she has left… 

Within a couple seconds, he manages to find one of his teammates and the two stuck together for a couple minutes. They found a good spot and chilled for a second after all the navigating and running. 

“So, the girl that’s currently out.. She’s your girlfriend, right?” the boy said, he looked around 14-15 but EJ couldn’t exactly tell.

“Yep and once she’s back in, we’re gonna need to hide really well.” he warned, followed by a chuckle. “You really think she’s gonna be that furious?” 

Poor kid. He really doesn’t know what she’s capable of, he thought to himself. “Oh yeah, she’s gonna be infuriated. Don’t worry though, she’s probably gonna come for me only. We’re just super competitive like that. It runs in our blood.” 

EJ glanced back to see the kid terrified. “O..k.” he let out. The conversation didn’t go much further but at least before they split off, EJ did manage to get across the fact that he was only joking. 

After a while of walking, he checked his watch and realized that Gina would be out any second. Just as he thought, not a minute after checking the time, a beep came from the speakers signaling that a player would be entering the game.. It was about to get a whole lot more dangerous than before. 

Once she was out, Gina knew exactly what EJ would be thinking.. He knew that he was her main target and that’s what he needed to get out of his head. 

So, Gina put her focus on getting his teammates out first, with the help of hers as well of course. If she was being fully honest, she really did not expect to work as well with her team as she did. They were just as cunning and competitive. 

This made Gina’s plan that much easier to complete. While waiting out her ten minutes, she had concocted a pretty simple but effective plan. 

Her teammates and some of the opposing team members were actually everyday regulars here at the lasertag so they knew the routes and pathways that the others would take. With this information, it was decided that they’d take care of their own personal friends and get them out while Gina was left to find EJ and get him out. 

Yes,it was simple but if Gina was going to win, all she needed was for it to be efficient. 

Not much time was wasted, once she got out. The beeper signaling that players were out began to go off every couple of minutes, she quietly counted while swiftly moving through the area. Out of the corner of the eye, she saw something from behind. No way, she was turning her back this time. 

She quietly and carefully walked back to the spot where she noticed something and immediately let out a breath of relief at seeing a kid resting back in the corner, his eyes shut tight. “It’s fine, it’s fine. I’ll tell you where he is. Just please don’t tell him I told you. I can be out, it’s ok, I-” 

“Ya know, kid. I actually kinda like you for that but what did EJ tell you?! Did you really believe I was seriously out to murder him, it’s just our thing.. Don’t worry and well, if we’re bargaining here.. The best I can do is you give me EJ’s location and I’ll give you an extra ten minutes to go hide.” she explained, holding her hand out to seal the deal. 

He looked down a bit worried but shook nonetheless. He quickly whispered where he thought EJ would be hiding and ran away within a second after. 

Gina followed his instructions and slowly crept up to the second level of the arena. She knew that kid gave it up way too easily and there was no harm in being cautious so she walked towards the spot that the kid described as quietly as possible. 

Once she was there, she looked around but not carefully enough because now she was back to square one when she heard his voice. “Well, looks like my plan worked. I’m just so touched with how well you’re taking this, G.” 

“Aww Eej, you think you’re really gonna end up winning”, she started, as she turned and began slowly walking towards the proud boy, “-tsk tsk, you’re too good and naive for your own good, babe. 

EJ furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and ever so slightly,let his guard down. Rookie mistake, Gina thought as she jumped towards EJ again. He saw it coming and dodged the attack but ended up causing Gina to trip over his foot. 

She yelped at the collision with the floor. Pain shot through her wrist as she sat back up. Within a second EJ was already at her side, helping her stand. “Maybe we got a little too intense with the game..” he joked, walking to the arena exit with Gina. 

“Ya think?” she laughed, while gently massaging her palm and wrist area. Once they made it, the two returned their gear to the set-up room. There was still about a half hour of laser tag left but it was obvious, the game was done for today. 

Even if their initial idea got cut short, that didn’t mean the day was over. As EJ and Gina walked to the car, they couldn’t help but continuously chitter and chatter about all that occurred. From Gina’s surprise attack on him to EJ’s interesting conversation with the young boy. 

By then, Gina’s wrist had relaxed and the pain toned down. While they drove, the chitter chatter turned to a comfortable silence. It was just that time where words didn’t need to be said anymore. The glances, little laughs here and there, it was just really nice. 

The drive didn’t take too long and before they knew it, they’d already arrived at Ashlyn and Gina’s place.  

“So.. we’re here. Look, I’m sorry about the wrist thing and I just got a little too into it, you see when I-” His rambling got cut short by Gina pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. 

“Hey, it’s alright. It was just a game and it’s not like the day is over yet, I’d like to use up all the time I have with you today.” she smiled after breaking off the kiss. EJ proceeded to continually caress her cheek as she spoke. 

“Ok. This time, you name it though.” 

Gina decided on a movie night to end the day. 

Honestly, this month’s date night wasn’t the most planned and perfect but that’s what made it all the more fun. Both EJ and Gina couldn’t wait for the next to see what surprises were in store.

[blueskrugs]

Some People Do, Part 2. | Nathan MacKinnon

the MacRedemption arc y’all didn’t need or ask for. this fic brought to you by taylor swift’s folklore

Part 1.

also huge shoutout to @burkymakar for beta-ing this monster of a sequel that turned out about three and a half times as long as the original.

length: 21.1k words

The Avalanche’s new season started. You didn’t watch the home opener. In fact, you weren’t even around to watch it. You left Denver. Took some leave from work, packed a couple bags, and went back to your hometown to be with your family for a while.

Or, to be somewhere where the ghosts of your relationship with Nate didn’t seem to follow you everywhere. You didn’t think Denver and the people in it would miss you that much anyway. 

Mel called you one afternoon at the beginning of the Avs’ first road trip of the season. “Linnea misses you,” she said gently after you picked up the phone. “The boys are out of town, and I want all the girls to come over to watch the game tomorrow night. I’ll buy that wine you like, and we can order pizza.”

You sucked in a deep breath, your hand pausing where it was buried deep in your parents’ dog’s fur. Mel misinterpreted your silence and rushed to keep talking.

“We don’t have to talk about anything. We just want to see you. No one’s really heard from you since the season started.”

“Mel, I’m not in Denver. I left.” You heard Mel drop something on the other end of the line. Zoey started barking in the background.

“You left? What d’you mean you left? Without telling anyone? Y/N!” Mel’s voice rose as she spoke. You winced a little bit.

“I mean, I told my mom I was coming home…” Mel sighed at you. “Look, I’ll come back eventually, probably, I just couldn’t handle being there, seeing his face or hearing his name everywhere anymore.” Mel hummed, a sad sound. “Please don’t tell Gabe or any of the boys that I’m gone. I don’t need them worrying about me.”

“Oh, they already do, but I won’t say anything, I promise,” Mel said. 

When your phone rang later that night and EJ’s name flashed across your screen, you groaned and cursed Mel under your breath. Of course she had told EJ anyway. You let it ring through to voicemail; he called again. He left a voicemail the second time, and then a minute later, your phone vibrated with a text, too. You didn’t really feel like listening to EJ scold you, so you ignored them both. EJ kept texting you through the night, all variations of “call me back.”

It wasn’t until you were curled up in your bed in the dark, a blanket wrapped around your shoulders as you leaned against your headboard, that you pressed play on EJ’s voicemail. He did indeed scold you for a moment before his voice softened. You could picture the worried look in his eyes clearly. 

“Please call me back, Y/N. Gabe’s losing his mind, and I want to know that you’re okay. I will fucking fly to your hometown if you won’t talk to me,” he threatened.

The thing was, you really didn’t doubt that EJ would use their next off day to track you down. You bit your lip, thumb hovering over the call button. The phone had barely rung once before EJ was answering it. 

“Thank fuck, Y/N.” He sounded a little out of breath, and a lot like he was trying to be casual about it, but failing terribly, which made you smile. “Mel said you left Denver? Why the hell didn’t you tell me?”

“Mel also said she wasn’t going to tell you boys. And I didn’t tell you because I wasn’t aware that I had to tell you everything, EJ. You’re not my brother.”

You could practically hear EJ rolling his eyes at you. “No, but I’m the closest thing you’ve got while you’re in Denver, and it would’ve been nice to know you’re safe or something.”

You scoffed. “Not like any of you have tried very hard to check on me before now. You could’ve called at any time, EJ.”

EJ sighed, “Okay, fair enough. Do you know when you’ll come home? Cox has been moping around the house since training camp started. We all know he misses you, but Nate doesn’t want to talk about it.”

“I don’t know if I will come back, E,” you said carefully. EJ made a sound like he wanted to argue with you but stayed quiet. “I love Denver, but so much of it is tied up with Nate, I don’t know if I can handle that.” “Okay, but consider this: someone’s gotta take care of Burky, because he’s still kind of an idiot.” That startled a laugh out of you, and when EJ spoke again, you could hear his grin. “I think he almost misses you more than Cox.” He paused. “We all miss you, Y/N.”

It was almost November before you made yourself get on a plane back to Denver. You went quietly, too afraid of how many Avs players would show up at your apartment door if they caught wind of you being back in town. You went back to work every day, and at night you would sit on the couch with a glass of wine and torture yourself by watching the Avalanche play. It turned out that not even a broken heart could keep you away from hockey for too long. You still had to catch yourself to keep from cheering every time Nate scored, though. Some habits were harder to break than others, apparently.

You still texted EJ every once in a while, carefully not mentioning that you were back in Denver. You wondered how long it would take him to figure out. 

You watched the games from the safety of your apartment most nights, and you never texted any of the boys, though the temptation was there sometimes, after someone scored a particularly good goal, or took a spectacularly stupid penalty. 

And then Nate took a dirty hit from a Stars player that threw him into the boards. It was his shoulder again, you knew, even before he got up slowly and made his way off the ice, even through the TV screen you were watching on. The camera panned over the bench once, showed you all the tense, worried faces of the players as they looked at each other, looked at the scoreboard—where they were losing with not enough time left—looked at where one of their best players had disappeared down the tunnel. 

Your phone was in your hand before you realized what you were doing. You were pretty sure you still had one of the trainers’ numbers from one of Nate’s last injuries, but as you pulled open the text thread, you didn’t even know what to say. 

No one knew where your relationship with Nate stood. Hell, you didn’t even know where your relationship with Nate stood anymore. No one even knew you’d come back to Denver. 

You chewed on your bottom lip as you watched the clock wind down. Your phone stayed unlocked in your hand, but you hadn’t typed anything. 

Instead, you backed out of the texts to the Avs’ trainer. You opened a text thread you hadn’t used much lately. Typed out a message and hit send before you could stop yourself. 

“Can I come over?”

You were half-asleep on the couch when your phone vibrated again half an hour later, hockey highlights on mute on the TV. You jolted awake, reaching for it in the half-dark. You blinked against the brightness of your phone screen. On it were two words: “of course.”

You jumped up, tugging a hoodie on over your pajamas. 

The roads to Nate’s house were familiar, even in the dark. Your hands shook on your steering wheel as you got closer. You weren’t really sure what you had been thinking when you had texted Nate, aside from some instinct to take care of him when he was injured. 

You weren’t sure what Nate was thinking by telling you to come over, either. 

The lights were on on the first floor when you pulled into the driveway. You sat in the car for a minute, steeling yourself, before making your way to the front door. 

You no longer had a key. You could hear Cox barking inside, his nails scrabbling on the hardwood as he raced towards the front door, and Nate’s frustrated, “God, shut up!” before the door was being pulled open. 

Cox barked one last time before he was barreling into your legs. You bent down to pet Cox, burying your face in his fur for a moment, choosing to ignore Nate standing in the doorway. If you were hiding a few tears, that was between you and Cox. Cox stopped deigning to stand still after a minute, wanting instead to lick your face, so you pulled back and stood up, meeting Nate’s eyes at last.

His arm was in a sling, and he looked tired, beyond the fact that he had just played a hard hockey game, and more like he wasn’t sleeping well. He shifted awkwardly on his socked feet; you tried not to notice the way he winced when his shoulder moved. 

His voice was quiet, shy, when he spoke. “Hi.”

Cox was still wiggling happily at your feet, and you almost didn’t hear him. You stopped petting Cox to grin sheepishly up at Nate. “Hey.”

Nate shook himself a little, taking a step back and opening the front door a little wider. “Come on, it’s dark out.”

You followed him inside, noting the stiffness in his neck and shoulders as he walked. Cox nudged at your hands as you walked, clearly ecstatic that you’d come home. Nate went into the living room and settled on the couch, but you walked into the kitchen to pull an ice pack out of the freezer. Your hands were shaking a little again.

You slowly made your way back into the living room, trying very hard not to think about everything that had happened the last time you had been in there. Nate had turned the TV on, but you didn’t look at it as you threw the ice pack at him. Nate winced again as he caught it, but still mumbled a “Thanks.” 

You stayed standing. Cox rolled over onto his back by your feet. Nate chuckled at him a little before an awkward silence fell over the room again.

“I didn’t know you were back in Denver,” Nate said finally. You had crouched down to rub Cox’s belly, but your head shot up to look at Nate. He hadn’t moved on the couch, and between the sling, the ice pack, and the tension in the room, he looked downright uncomfortable. You couldn’t find it in yourself to feel particularly sorry for him.

“I didn’t know EJ had told you I left,” you replied, making a mental note to kill EJ the next time you saw him. Nate shrugged as best as he could with an injured shoulder. “I came back a couple of weeks ago, been keeping to myself mostly.” Nate made a face that you couldn’t read. That was new. You’d always been able to figure him out, even when he was trying to hide his emotions. 

“Why are you here?” Nate asked quietly. Your hands paused in Cox’s fur again. You knew he wasn’t asking why you had come back to Denver, but why you were here in the house you used to share, getting him ice packs and petting Cox like nothing had ever changed. 

“I don’t know, Nate,” you sighed. “Honestly. I was watching the game and saw you go down, and some terrible fucking instinct of mine wanted to make sure you were okay, and here I am.”

Nate grinned, but his eyes were sad. “You don’t have to take care of me anymore. I don’t deserve it.” It was your turn to shrug. Cox was now attempting to sit in your lap; you pushed your face into his fur again, taking a deep breath to steady yourself. “He’s missed you a lot, y’know,” Nate added. Cox rested his chin on the top of your head. “I think he’s mad at me or something. Gives me the cold shoulder when I get home from roadies now. Won’t sleep on the bed with me anymore, either.” 

You managed a laugh; you hoped Nate didn’t hear how watery it was. Cox snuffled in your hair, and you hugged him a little tighter. When you pulled back from him, Nate was smiling at both of you fondly, and a little wistfully.

You stood up, checking your watch. “I should- I better go. It’s getting kinda late, and I have to work in the morning.” Something flashed across Nate’s face again, but he stood up, letting the ice pack fall to the couch. He was clearly still in pain, but he was less stiff than he had been when you arrived. “Don’t leave that on the couch overnight,” you told him, looking over his shoulder at the melting ice pack. Nate rolled his eyes, but smiled softly at you.

“I won’t, I promise.” Nate followed you to the door. “Hey, can I drop Cox off at your place some days, and, like, for some of our road trips? I don’t know if he can handle you not being around much longer.” You both looked at Cox, who was also following you two to the door, suddenly looking dejected again. “Look, he knows you’re leaving again.” Nate bent down to squish Cox’s face as best as he could with only one hand, then settled for ruffling his ears. “He misses you.” You smiled in spite of yourself and bent to drop a kiss to the top of Cox’s head.

“I miss you, too, baby. My apartment is a lot smaller than you’re used to, but there’s a park we can go to a couple of blocks over.” Cox whined at you. 

“Text me when you get home, yeah?” Nate said. 

You looked closely at him before responding. His eyes were still tired, a little haggard and a little too old for his body, but they were brighter than they had been earlier. 

“Of course,” you said. 

You did text Nate as soon as your apartment door was locked behind you. It felt strange, something you had both always done in the early days of your relationship, but had stopped being necessary as time went on and you had moved in together. It hurt a little bit, knowing all the history and things you had shared with Nate, but feeling as if you barely knew each other after all this time. You had never imagined that you would have to start your relationship over with Nate. You weren’t sure you really wanted to. 

Nate started texting you again after that, just random, unobtrusive messages: pictures and videos of Cox or stupid things one of his teammates had said during the day. You never replied, aside from occasionally reacting to some of the messages, but Nate didn’t seem to expect or need a response from you, because they just kept coming. 

You started to look forward to seeing them everyday.

Cox did also start coming around to your apartment, though it was usually EJ or Burky bringing him over. The first time Nate had tried to drop him off, but Cox had gotten confused and wouldn’t let Nate leave. It had led to one very awkward walk to the park in silence. 

The first road trip was the hardest. It was nice to have Cox around again, curled up behind your legs in your bed as you slept and demanding attention constantly, but you couldn’t help but think of the things you now knew. The things Nate got up to on road trips. Was it just like last year all over again? Were you home with the dog while Nate was off with some girl that wasn’t you? Was he with the same girl as last time, was he still flying her out to games? Or had he found someone else new to pass the time with?

The Avs swept the road trip, but you couldn’t bring yourself to watch any of the games.

It was the week before Christmas when you found yourself outside Nate’s front door again. He had tried to give you a key– your old key– since you were taking care of Cox all the time, but you couldn’t bring yourself to take it. Today you had been baking, and Sarah had asked for your snickerdoodles for when she came to town. 

Cox didn’t bark when you came to the door anymore, but he did greet you with a toy in his mouth. 

“You’re a terrible guard dog,” Nate scoffed. Cox wiggled excitedly. “He still knows the sound of your car,” he told you. “You can never get another one.”

You laughed, handing the Tupperware of cookies off to Nate so you could bend down and throw the toy for Cox. “He’s a good guard dog when it counts,” you said. “Remember when he barked at EJ because he had his teeth in?”

Nate laughed as you followed him into the kitchen. “I think he growled at Burky for like two months, but only if he was wearing a hat.” He tilted the Tupperware of cookies up to the light. “Jesus, how many cookies did you fucking bake? You know I can’t eat any of these, right?”

You rolled your eyes. “Oh, whatever, don’t front. You and Tyson used to eat all sorts of shit I would bake during the season. And your sister asked for snickerdoodles, and I wanted to try a new recipe for gingerbread, so y’all get to be the guinea pigs for it, too.”

Nate’s eyes widened, and he tore the lid off the container and dug through it until he came up with a gingerbread cookie.  “Fuck, Y/N, I love you,” he groaned, mouth full of cookie, before he froze. “I didn’t- I’m sorry. These are really good, though.”

All you said was, “Don’t talk with your mouth full, MacKinnon,” just to see Nate’s blush. His words, however accidental, however impulsive, were still ringing in your ears, and you were trying not to think about them. 

Nate finished his cookie in silence. Cox had come back and was nudging your hand so you would throw his toy again. Outside the kitchen window, it had started to snow, fat white flakes floating by. You threw Cox’s toy a couple more times, watching as he skittered off down the hall.

“Big, scary German shepherd, my ass,” you muttered as Cox slid and wiped out on the hardwood. His tail was still wagging.

The snow was falling harder already. “I should get home before I get snowed in here,” you said, reaching for your keys.

Nate looked out the window, alarmed. “Like hell you are. It’s dark and already snowing hard. I don’t want you driving home in this.”

“Nate,” you sighed.

“I know, I know. But it’s too fucking dangerous for you to drive, and you can have the guest room and Cox, and I’ll stay out of your way. I meant what I said about leaving you alone when you closed the door. I just don’t want anything to happen to you.”

You sighed, looking over Nate’s shoulder at the snow falling outside the window. It really was falling fast already, quickly becoming a blizzard. You shivered in spite of yourself. 

“Fine, but I’m taking you up on sharing a bed with Cox.”

Nate grinned, and it hit you that you could never make yourself hate that smile. 

Cox trailed after you to the living room, but Nate lingered in the kitchen. You could hear him banging through cabinets and drawers. At one point, he called out, “Where’s the- never mind!” You and Cox just shared a look. 

Eventually Nate came into the living room, balancing two mugs of hot chocolate and a plate full of gingerbread cookies. You raised an eyebrow, but Nate just shrugged.

“It’s cold outside. By the way, you might need to make more gingerbread before Sarah comes.”

“I thought cookies weren’t on the diet,” you teased. Nate’s ears turned red, and you laughed.

“Don’t tell anyone,” he said, taking a bite to punctuate his sentence.

A quiet fell again, and outside the window, so did the snow. You ran your fingers through Cox’s fur absentmindedly as you sipped your hot chocolate.

“Is that really what you want, Nate? Someone who doesn’t even like hockey?” you blurted. You didn’t regret shattering the careful atmosphere of the house.

Nate grimaced, and he rushed to set his mug down, nearly spilling hot chocolate on the rug. He turned to look at you. “Fuck, no, Y/N, I- I have never regretted anything more in my life. And regrets do fuck-all to fix things, I know that, but I want you to know that, given the opportunity, I would go back to the beginning of last season and change it all. I could still play the worst hockey of my career, and I wouldn’t care as long as I got to keep you at the end of it all.”

“Nate, some of the things you said...I spent so many nights awake last summer, thinking about them, wondering what I could’ve done better or differently, wondering if it was all my fault,” you said. You didn’t wipe away the tear that slid down your cheek. 

Nate looked like he wanted to reach out to touch you. “I believed what I said at the time, fuck, I was so stupid. One of the things I’ve always loved most about you is that you loved hockey before you met me. You understood hockey. And suddenly I had someone in my life who loved the sport I loved, but also loved me. You knew when to talk about the game with me, and you knew when to distract me. You would have loved me even without the hockey, and I was so fucking destructive, so fucking stupid that I threw it all away.” Nate’s blue eyes were clouded with tears now, too. 

“Where did I go wrong, Nate? Where did we go wrong?”

This time Nate did reach out for you, lunging across the couch to grab your hands, sliding down to his knees next to you. “No, no, fuck no. None of this is on you; it never was. I thought then that what I needed was the anonymity to ground me, but what I’ve always needed was you.” 

You let out a sob, wrenched one of your hands away from Nate’s to cover your mouth. Nate grabbed your wrist and tugged your hand back down, brushing a tear away with his thumb as he did. 

“You’re the one who’s always kept me grounded, got me out of my head when I would start to freak out. You never gave a fuck about who I was. I could just be Nate with you.”

You sat still for a moment, trying to process Nate’s words. “I left Denver because I couldn’t handle seeing your fucking face everywhere. Because no matter what you did, you would always be Nathan MacKinnon, face of the Colorado Avalanche. But you fucking destroyed me, Nate. I didn’t know if I’d ever be able to trust myself or anyone else again. I didn’t know if I’d ever want to come back to Denver again. I hated myself for still loving someone who had proved that he could forget about me so easily.” You broke off with another sob; Nate rubbed his thumb across the back of your hand absently. “I meant what I said about not being able to do this again. I can’t just jump headfirst into the deep end. I can’t go back to the way things were, no matter how much I want to. I just can’t.”

Nate smiled, but it was small. “I don’t think I could ask you to go back to the way things were. I don’t wanna ask you to start over and forget everything, either. I don’t deserve that. But you’re here. And I wanna know if you’re willing to try, let me prove that I can do this right this time.” 

You sighed and looked away. Nate’s eyes, intense and cautiously hopeful, were too much to look at. “I don’t know, Nate.” Nate visibly deflated. “It’s not a no,” you added. “Just… I don’t know.” You were still gazing around the living room. It was the week before Christmas, but there weren’t any decorations anywhere, not even a tree. “Hey, where are all of our Christmas decorations?” you asked.

Nate shrugged and stood up. “Didn’t feel right, without you, I guess. Just never really seemed like Christmas,” he admitted. You pouted a little at him, but he just rolled his eyes.

Christmas had always been your favorite holiday, and, over the years, you had brought Nate around to loving it just as much as you did. 

You and Nate had only been dating a couple of weeks by the time the holiday season rolled around. Nate didn’t seem nearly as enthusiastic about Christmas as you were, even though this would be your first Christmas in Denver, away from your family. 

“Nate, where are your Christmas decorations?” you called, standing in the entryway and looking at Nate’s barren house at the beginning of December. 

He poked his head out of a doorway. “I have a tree?” he said. You must’ve looked appalled, because he added, “I don’t really need that much. We’re gone so much, it doesn’t feel like it’s worth the effort.”

“Okay, change of plans!” you said, already slipping your boots back on. Nate groaned, but he came into the hallway, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow at you. “I wanted to get some new decorations for my apartment, and now you’re coming, too, so we can decorate this wasteland you call a house.”

“Hey! My mom did a lot of the decorating in here!” 

“Yes, and it still looks exactly like the house of a twenty-something professional athlete who doesn’t give a fuck aboout aesthetic or interior design. Now, come on, put your shoes on, let’s go!”

Nate groaned again, but he grabbed his keys and put on shoes. “Fine, but I’m driving,” he said, leaning down to give you a quick kiss. You grinned at him.

You already had most of the decorations you needed for your small apartment, but Nate’s house had pretty much nothing, and Nate had absolutely no idea how much time you could spend shopping, especially when it came to Christmas decorations.

You ended up dragging him to four stores over the course of a couple hours, with the promise of “I swear it won’t take long in there” every time. It never was true. By the end, the trunk of Nate’s car was filled with bags of decorations, including some cute wrapping paper and bows you had insisted he buy.

“You know I can’t wrap a present, right?” he had asked when you put the wrapping paper in the cart. You had let out a frustrated groan, poking him between the ribs.

“Well, guess you’re gonna have to learn, MacKinnon, because I am not wrapping your presents for you.”

It took the two of you nearly ten minutes to haul all the bags back into the house, with Cox excitedly running back and forth with you on each trip. Nate collapsed on the couch. 

“Babe, I’m tired,” he said. Cox, still excited, leaped onto his stomach. “Oof, bud, rude.”

“Did you still want to cook, or do you want to order something?” you asked, digging through a bag for the wreath you wanted to hang on the front door.

Nate checked his watch. “What about that one bar we went to last week? They had good food.” 

You nodded, now looking for the stocking you had insisted Nate buy for Cox.

After a couple more hours, Nate’s house had been decorated to your satisfaction, with lights, candles and garland. You had made Nate turn on Christmas music while you worked, and more than once you caught him smiling at you as you sang along. Nate was now slumped on the couch again. You threw a throw pillow at him.

“See, I told you it would feel more like a home if you decorated.” Nate sighed and hugged the pillow to his chest without opening his eyes, which you knew meant that you were right but he didn't want to admit to it. “Do you want to go to bed?” you asked. Nate nodded silently. The Avs didn’t have an early practice in the morning, and as the hours had ticked on while you decorated, Nate had told you to stay the night instead of driving home.

“Hey, wait,” Nate said suddenly as you walked through the doorway, tugging your wrist and spinning you around into his chest. “Isn’t there some tradition to do with kissing?”

“I didn’t buy mistletoe, Nate,” you teased, but you let Nate lean down to kiss you anyway, slow and deep, with one hand on the small of your back and the other cupping your cheek.

You got ready for bed in a comfortable silence. You were still humming the words to a Christmas song. Cox was waiting on the bed for you when you left the bathroom. Nate made him move over so you could have room on the bed, but he did so begrudgingly. You hadn’t been planning on staying, so you were drowning in one of Nate’s T-shirts.

You curled into his chest, and when he spoke, his voice rumbled beneath your ear. “You should come to the Christmas family skate with me,” he said casually, but you could feel his tenseness where your hand was resting on his hip. 

You pulled back to look at him. “You know I can’t skate, right?” And other than seeing Tyson Barrie a handful of times, mostly in passing, you hadn’t met any of Nate’s teammates, and you weren’t going to lie and say you weren’t a little nervous about the idea. 

“You’ll be surrounded by hockey players, babe. I’ll make sure you don’t fall, don’t worry.”

Nate broke you out of your reverie. “Would you- did you want to decorate? I can get everything out.” He sounded unsure. Decorating for Christmas had become an all-day affair over the years, complete with baking cookies and watching holiday movies. 

You thought about it for a second. Nate had been right, something about Christmas felt off this year, like something– or someone, you supposed wryly–  was missing.

“You go get the boxes, I’ll make more hot chocolate, and I get to pick the music.”

“Always,” Nate smiled, bright and wide and real, almost relieved that you’d been willing. 

Something told you that no one had seen a lot of that smile recently. 

While you waited for Nate to dig out the boxes of Christmas decorations, you stole his Bluetooth speaker to connect your Christmas playlist, and turned on the gas fireplace. Instantly, the room felt warmer and more welcoming.

Almost like home.

Nate set one of the boxes down with a thud, startling you. “Alright, here’s the tree, and we’ve still got like four more boxes, because someone has no self control when it comes to buying Christmas decorations.”

You blushed a little, but looked straight at Nate when you said, “Well, let’s get started then.”

You moved easily around each other, falling into a rhythm. You were mostly quiet, aside from Nate asking you where things went, and both of you singing along to songs, but it wasn’t awkward or tense like most of your silences had been of late. Nate didn’t even complain when you threw a throw pillow at him.

“Where Are You Christmas” began playing, Faith Hill’s voice filling the living room, and you smiled as Nate stretched to put the star on top of the tree. He turned and saw you looking at him; he walked over to you, slipping one arm around your waist.

“Whatcha thinking about?” he asked quietly.

“Feels like Christmas again,” you murmured. 

Nate wrapped his other arm around you and tugged you in for a hug. You wrapped your arms around him, solid and strong like he’d always been, and let yourself lean into it. You stayed like that for several minutes, long enough for the song to end and another one to start. The living room had been mostly decorated, and behind Nate, the tree filled the room with a warm light. You could see the two salt dough ornaments you had made for your second Christmas together, when Nate gave you a key to his house and asked if you would move in, and when you had wrangled Cox into making one with his pawprint.

The song changed again. You smiled against Nate’s shirt. They’re singing ‘Deck the Halls’ but it’s not like Christmas at all, ‘cause I remember when you were here, and all the fun we had last year. Nate rested his chin on the top of your head; he was warm, chasing away the chill you still felt from the snow outside.

Cox nudged his way in between you, never wanting to miss anything, effectively ruining the moment. He jumped up, placing his paws gently on Nate’s chest. 

“Oh, do you wanna be in on the hug too, buddy?” Nate asked, ruffling Cox’s ears. You smiled at them as Cox wagged his tail, trying to fight back a yawn, but Nate noticed anyway. “It’s getting pretty late, isn’t it? Do you want to borrow something to sleep in?”

You had spent the day baking, so you weren’t dressed nicely, but it would be nice to wear something else to sleep in. Nate left you in the guest bathroom with an extra toothbrush, and an old, well-worn Avalanche T-shirt. Cox was laying on the floor, waiting for you. 

It felt strange, wearing one of Nate’s oversized T-shirts, in the house you once called home, sleeping in the guest room like a stranger. Everything was so familiar, but you no longer felt like you belonged. You were on your phone under the blankets when Cox jumped off the bed and whined at the closed door. 

“What is it, baby?” you asked, peering through the dark. You could just barely make out Cox’s dark eyes staring back at you. He whined again, this time pawing at the bottom of the door. “You wanna go sleep with Nate? C’mon.”

You pushed the blankets back and climbed out of the bed. Sleep didn’t seem to be coming any time soon, anyway. Cox whined again as you walked across the room and opened the door. He took a step out into the hall before turning back to look at you again. 

You groaned. “Cox, I know you know where the bedroom is. Go find Nate.” Cox took a couple steps, but stopped when he saw you weren’t following him. “Stupid dog, let’s go.”

Cox ran ahead as you made your way to the closed bedroom door. He sat next to you, looked up at you with his tongue hanging out, and you knocked quietly on the door. 

“Yeah?” Nate didn’t sound like he’d been asleep, either. 

“Cox wants to sleep with you, apparently.” Nate chuckled, and you heard his footsteps on the other side of the door. 

You took a step back as he pulled it open. “I thought you didn’t like me anymore?” he asked. Cox ignored him and leaped onto the bed. You both laughed as he settled in, looking very pleased with himself. You were on your way back to the guest room when you heard Nate speak softly again. “Goodnight, Y/N.”

Ten minutes later, you were still scrolling aimlessly through your phone when it vibrated with a text. “he won’t stop whining at the door.” You frowned before replying. 

“that’s what he was doing in here. I thought he just wanted to be with you.”

There was a longer pause before Nate replied again; you were about to set your phone down and try to sleep. “I think he wants both of us” Then: “come to bed?”

You stared at that text until your screen went dark. You could go to sleep and pretend that it never happened, but something was stopping you. Something about the night you and Nate had shared gave you the distinct sensation that your relationship had shifted again. You still weren’t sure where you stood, not really, but thinking about your relationship no longer came with the sharp edge of heartbreak it had held for so long.

You crept out into the hallway again. Down the stairs, the soft glow of all of the Christmas lights you had put up still lit up the house. The door to your old bedroom was still solidly closed. You could picture Nate tangled up in the sheets, like he always used to be, with Cox stretched out near his feet. You paused with your hand on the doorknob. 

You could turn back now, and no one would know. You wondered vaguely, what kind of woman it made you, to even consider fixing a relationship with the man who cheated on you. Did it make you weak? Were you a fool? What did it mean that Nate had destroyed your trust, and you were willing to give it back to him, however broken?

You twisted the doorknob. As light from the hall flooded into the room, you could see Cox sitting up on the bed, staring at the door, and Nate was leaned up against the headboard. When he smiled at you, his teeth flashed white in the dimness.

Cox was thumping his tail against the bed. “Seriously, do you guard against anything?” you whispered as he licked your hand.

Nate was quiet as you set your phone down on the bedside table and settled into bed. “He’s pretty good at guarding my heart,” he whispered. There was an infinity of space between the two of you on the bed, but Cox was warm against your feet. 

“I think it took him three months before he stopped watching my every move when I was over,” you said back. “Too bad he couldn’t protect me against a broken heart.” Nate sucked in a sharp breath. You rolled over before he could respond.

The two of you laid in the dark and silence for a while; you couldn’t tell how much time had passed, but eventually you fell asleep.

When you woke up in the morning, you found yourself tangled with Nate. His bare feet were cold against your legs, but his hand was warm where it had slipped under your– his, really– T-shirt. Your face was tucked into his chest, and you could feel his slow, gentle breaths stirring your hair. 

Outside, the sun glinted off the snow, bitterly cold, but inside, in this bed, you were warm and cozy, Nate’s arm across your hip a comforting weight.  You closed your eyes and let yourself drift off to sleep again.

When you awoke again, Nate was awake, but he had pulled you closer. You tilted your chin up to meet his eyes. 

“I’m sorry,” he breathed. You weren’t sure what he was apologizing for anymore. 

You laid like that for a few minutes more before Cox stuck his nose under the sheets and whined. You laughed as Nate squirmed away from the cold.

“I think someone wants breakfast,” you said, stretching. Cox’s ears perked up. 

“C’mon, buddy,” Nate sighed.

When you wandered downstairs a few minutes later, Nate was standing in the kitchen, making breakfast. He had turned on Christmas music again and was singing along with Mariah Carey. You only barely resisted the urge to sneak your phone out and record him. As it was, you stood and watched him for a moment, leaning against the island with a small smile on your face. Eventually, Nate felt your eyes on his back and turned around.

“Still like your eggs the same way?” he asked. You had never changed the way you took your eggs in all the years you had known Nate, so you nodded. Nate had already turned back to the stove.

Things were awkward again in the daylight, the rawness of all the talking done the night before too much for the sunshine. You watched and waited as Nate put eggs on two plates, pulled some fruit out of the fridge, and slid you a mug of coffee. It was still hot, and made just the way you liked it. 

“They should have the roads cleared soon, and you can get home,” Nate said, breaking the silence. You looked up at him, startled, but his eyes were focused on his plate. Right. Time to break the spell and return to the real world. Christmas music was still playing quietly, but now it felt wrong.

“Oh, shit, I’m gonna have to clean off my car,” you groaned.

“I’ll help you,” Nate said easily, and maybe things didn’t quite have to go back to the way things were. 

Christmas passed without further incident, although André did text you and ask for more gingerbread cookies. Nate continued texting you, but now you started responding every once in a while, even sending him something first a couple of times. When Nate dropped Cox off the night before a road trip, he came with takeout from your favorite restaurant. EJ started texting you more, too, asking pointed questions about when you would come to a game or hang out with the guys.

You had been avoiding them, it was true, and you missed them, but you weren’t entirely sure that you could handle all of them. It turned out that you couldn’t avoid them any longer when Mel and Aleks invited– insisted, more like– you to come to a game with them just after the new year. 

You told them that you would think about it and took a full two days to respond. You said yes; you always knew you would say yes. You decided not to tell any of the boys that you’d be going, but you got a text from every other wife and girlfriend, all telling you how excited they were to see you again.

You found yourself getting excited, too, despite the lingering anxiousness of seeing Nate around all of his teammates. You’d always loved the energy of hockey games, and the Pepsi Center was no exception. It was thrilling, in a way, and it always seemed more energizing when you were dating one of the players down on the ice, listening to thousands of fans scream his name, knowing that you were the one who got to hold him after a game.

Now, though, you knew that you hadn’t been the only one who got to see Nate, to kiss him, after a game.

You drove to the Can with Mel and Linnea. You weren’t wearing your MacKinnon jersey, just a sweater and jeans; you had seen the jersey shoved in the back of your closet when you were getting ready, and paused, but you didn’t think you were ready for that, not yet. To her credit, Mel hadn’t commented on it when you climbed into her car. 

The Pepsi Center was as frenzied and intoxicating as you remembered it. The Avs’ last season had turned out to be a fluke, and the team was tearing up the Western Conference. Ashley Kadri laughed at you when she saw you simply staring around the arena like a child at their first hockey game, a giant grin on your face, but she draped her arm across your shoulders, pulling you in and saying, “Welcome back, girl.”

The Avalanche won in a wild battle against the Blues that saw Nate with two goals. You couldn’t help but think that you didn’t have a hat to throw if he had scored a third goal. 

The girls roped you into coming down to the family room to wait for your boys after the game. The adrenaline high of the game was wearing off, and you were nervous all over again about seeing Nate. Maybe you should’ve told him you were coming, you thought, as you chewed anxiously on your bottom lip. You didn’t think he’d get upset that you were at a game, he used to love it when you came to games, but things were so different now.

You were knocked out of your thoughts by a half-dressed, curly head of hair barrelling into you. You laughed, wrapping your arms around his shoulders for balance as he clutched onto your waist.

“Christ, Burky, I saw you, like, last week.”

André squeezed you tighter. “Yeah, but now you’re at a game! You haven’t come to a game in ages!”

“Let her breathe, Burk,” Gabe said from somewhere behind you. André let go, but didn’t move far away from you. “He’s right, though. You’ve been avoiding us.”

“God, you sound like EJ. Can you blame me for not wanting to see you guys?” You heard the defensiveness creep into your tone. Gabe just shrugged.

“Leave her alone, both of you.” It was Nate’s voice this time. You spun around to face him, and Burky took a half step in front of you. 

Nate didn’t seem to notice, though, because his eyes were on you. You knew he saw that you weren’t wearing his jersey, but his eyes lingered on the necklace that hung around your throat, the same one he had given you three years ago.

“I didn’t know you were coming,” he said. You bit your lip again. EJ appeared over Nate’s shoulder, like he could sense the tension, and was ready for a fight. “Shit, I mean, come here, yeah?�� 

You dashed around Burky and into Nate’s arms. He had already showered, and you buried your face in his chest, breathed in the familiar smell of his soap and deodorant, as he held you. Distantly, you heard some of the other boys cheering, and Gabe shushing them. Nate pulled away from you and walked you over to a quieter hallway around the corner.

“I didn’t know you were coming,” Nate repeated once the din of the rest of his team faded away.

You shrugged. “It was kinda an impulsive decision,” you lied, but Nate smirked at you.

“You never do anything impulsive. Besides, your hair and makeup are done, and it’s a Saturday night.” You stuck your tongue out at him instead of responding. Nate’s eyes softened as they caught the necklace you were wearing again. “I thought you would’ve gotten rid of that by now,” he said. 

Instinctively, your hand went up to fidget with the pendant. “I hadn’t been wearing it, but I thought I could tonight.”

Nate smiled sadly at you. “That was a nice night, wasn’t it?”

Your smile matched Nate’s. “Everything was nice back then.”

Your first anniversary with Nate actually fell in the middle of a road trip. Nate had called you to apologize when the schedule first came out, but you had just laughed and told him it wasn’t his fault.

He apologized again when you were sitting on his bed while he packed for the road trip. This time you stood up and wrapped your arms around Nate’s neck, going up on your toes to peck his lips.

“Babe, it’s fine, I get it,” you told him. “Cox and I will still be here when you get back.” Nate finally smiled at that.

“We’ll go out and celebrate properly then, I promise,” he said, tossing a pair of socks behind you at his suitcase. He missed. “By the way, can I have that hoodie back?”

You pulled the sleeves of his way-too-big hoodie over your hands. “What hoodie?” you asked innocently.

Nate laughed before wrapping his arms around your waist and picking you up. He tossed you easily onto the bed, and you shrieked as you bounced. And then Nate was on top of you, propped up on his forearms. He kissed you once, twice, and then a third time, deeper than the other two. You reached up and tangled your fingers in his hair. 

Nate pulled back just enough to murmur “I love you” against your lips before he was kissing you again. 

Downstairs, Nate’s doorbell rang, and Cox started barking. Nate buried his face in your neck and groaned. You scratched your nails down Nate’s neck; he melted into you.

“Tyson’s early,” you said. Nate groaned again. Cox was still barking at the door. “You should get off of me and finish packing.”

“Maybe if we ignore him he’ll just go away,” Nate said, voice still muffled into your shoulder. 

“Have you even met your best friend?” you asked, poking Nate in the ribs. He just rested his weight more solidly on top of you. As if to further prove your point, the doorbell rang again. 

Nate heaved a sigh and rolled off of you.

Nate ended up kicking you out of the bedroom while he finished packing, calling you a “distraction” and a “sweatshirt thief.” You settled for sitting on the couch with your feet on Tyson’s lap, Cox happily between the two of you, his head resting on your outstretched legs.

“So, what are you two doing for your anniversary?” Tyson asked, nosy as ever. 

“Fuck if I know,” you said. “Nate gave me his credit card one day last week to buy a dress, but he won’t tell me anything else about what we’re doing.”

Tyson laughed, and you kicked him. “Ow, rude!” Nate came down the stairs with his suitcase then. “Nathan, your girlfriend is being mean to me.”

“You probably deserved it,” Nate said flatly. Tyson looked absolutely affronted. Nate cut him off before he could say something indignant. “Come on, we’re gonna be late for the plane.” He shot you a grin and dropped a kiss on your head as he headed for the front door.

Tyson  grumbled as he shoved your feet off his lap and stood up, following Nate. 

“Text me when you land!” you called after them. Nate made a noise that might have been a “duh” at you before closing the front door. “Well, I guess it’s just us again, bud,” you said, looking at Cox, who decided he no longer wanted to be on the couch with you and flopped onto the floor.

When Nate Skyped you for your virtual date on your anniversary, you were surprised that he was in a button-down instead of his usual sweatshirt. You, on the other hand, were in an old Mooseheads sweatshirt that you had commandeered from Nate’s closet.

“Shit,” you said, “I didn’t know I was supposed to dress up for this.” 

Nate laughed; that was a sound you’d never get tired of hearing. “I’m still wearing sweatpants, don’t worry.”

You were in the kitchen this time, instead of curled up on Nate’s bed, as Nate had insisted that you eat dinner together, even going as far to order you a pizza from your favorite pizza place and have it delivered to you. Nate let you talk about your day at work while you ate, and then he told you about the practice they’d had that morning, and how the rookies were goofing off and got everyone in trouble. 

You talked for hours, you sitting at his kitchen table, Nate at the desk in his hotel room. It was getting late, and you stretched, Nate’s sweatshirt riding up your stomach.

“Hang on, what the hell did you do to my sweatshirt?” Nate asked, cutting himself off in the middle of a story.

You tugged the sweatshirt back down. You had gotten bored and cropped it, and you didn’t think Nate would ever notice. “I cropped it?” you said, more of a question.

“Babe, that could’ve been a collectible someday! And you destroyed it!”

You rolled your eyes. “I’ve never even seen you wear it, and I can promise you no one is going to think this will be a collectible one day. Besides, I can still wear it just fine.” You stood up, ready to go to bed, and your stomach flashed a little again.

Nate shrugged. “Okay, maybe I don’t mind it being cropped.”

Nate came home late a couple of days later. He was trying to be quiet as he came into the bedroom, but he tripped over Cox, who was sprawled out on the floor. He stripped out of his suit quickly, leaving it in a pile on the floor to deal with in the morning, before crawling into bed and laying half on top of you. The Avs had lost two out of three games on the trip, and you had winced more than once as you watched one of the guys take a rough hit. 

“Happy anniversary, babe,” he mumbled, already half-asleep. 

“That was a couple of days ago, baby,” you said softly, running your fingers through his hair. Nate hugged you tighter, but didn’t justify you with a response. 

When you woke up in the morning, Nate was still clinging to you, an overgrown, hockey-player-sized koala. The sun was streaming into the bedroom, which told you you’d both slept in much later than usual. Nate snuffled a little in his sleep, and you smiled down at him. 

You were still gazing at him when he started to wake up, snuggling in closer for a moment before rolling onto his back and stretching.

“Morning,” he yawned, before tugging you until you were on top of him this time, cuddling to his satisfaction. “We could stay like this all day, y’know,” he mumbled.

“I believe I was promised pancakes,” you said back. Nate sighed.

The two of you laid there for a while, just content to be close, until your stomach started growling. Nate laughed before pushing you off of him and getting up. You followed him down into the kitchen and watched as he pulled out all the things to make pancakes, including mix for some stupidly healthy kind that he insisted that he still had to eat.

The sounds of the coffee maker and Nate humming along to the radio filled the kitchen while you cut up some fruit. Nate only burnt a couple of the pancakes. 

You both laid around for most of the day, since you had the day off, and Nate skipped his optional skate. Cox seemed very happy to have both of his people around for the whole day. It wasn’t until late afternoon that Nate stood up, stretched and told you he was going to go shower. You lazed around on your phone for a while longer, until you heard Nate come out of the bathroom.

“My turn,” you said, coming into the bedroom. Nate shot you a look. “No coming into the bathroom until I come out.”

“But I haven’t seen your dress yet!” he protested. 

“Tell me where we’re going for dinner, and you can see the dress before I put it on,” you told him.

Nate stuck his tongue out at you. 

You emerged forty-five minutes later, makeup done and hair in place; you weren’t going to admit to how long it took you to get your eyeliner even. Nate wasn’t in the bedroom when you stepped out to grab your shoes and purse, so you snuck down the stairs barefoot. 

Nate startled when you put your hand on his shoulder, but when he turned around and saw you, he was struck speechless.

Your new dress was blush-pink velvet, long-sleeved, but with a short enough skirt to show off your legs in your heels. You twirled, albeit slightly self-consciously, for him.

“Do you like it?” you asked.

“I love it,” Nate said, catching you around the waist and pulling you in for a kiss. “I love you,” he added, resting his forehead against yours. “Now get your shoes on, we’re gonna be late for our reservation.

Nate drove, like he always did. It wasn’t until you actually pulled up to the restaurant that you realized where you were going. It was the same restaurant Nate had taken you to for your first date, one of the nicest in Denver; you had scolded him for the extravagance of it then, and you opened your mouth to do it now, but Nate cupped your jaw and gave you a quick kiss before you could.

“Hush, I’m allowed to spoil my girl every once in a while,” he said before opening his door and climbing out of his car. 

You were still fumbling with your seatbelt when Nate came around to your side of the car to help you out. He didn’t move his hand from the small of your back until you were seated, and he settled across the table from you.

You let Nate order the wine, the appetizer, even your meal, because sometimes it seemed like he knew you better than you knew yourself. You kept up conversation throughout dinner, easy talk about anything and everything. You loved that you and Nate could still find things to talk about, even after spending an entire day with each other. 

You were almost through the dessert you were sharing when Nate started getting fidgety. You waited him out until the last plate was cleared, until he swallowed the last of his wine, still didn’t seem to know what to do with his hands. You kicked him gently under the table.

“Don’t tell me you brought me here for a nice dinner just to break up with me,” you teased. 

Nate forced a laugh, but he looked less nervous. “On our anniversary? I would wait at least a week before I do that, but also I would never actually do that.” You laughed. “No, I got you something, but I just really want you to like it, and I-”

“Nate,” you said gently, nudging him gently with your foot again as you cut him off.

“Right,” Nate said, reaching into his inner jacket pocket and pulling out a jewelry box. He opened it to reveal a dark red garnet pendant, glowing in the dim restaurant lighting. 

“Oh, Nate, it’s beautiful.”

“Yeah?” he asked.

“Did your mom help you pick this out?” you teased.

“No, but Sarah did,” Nate mumbled, fumbling with the clasp as he tried to take it out of the box. “Turn around, I wanna put it on you.”

You rolled your eyes but turned and pulled your hair to the side so Nate could fasten the clasp around your neck. It hung perfectly just below your collarbones, and when you turned to kiss Nate again, it flashed and sparkled in the lights.

“I love it,” you murmured. In your heels, you didn’t have to stretch so much to kiss Nate. “I love you.”

“Hey,” Nate said, startling you out of your thoughts, “do you still have that Mooseheads sweatshirt you stole that week?”

You blushed, knowing exactly which sweatshirt he was talking about; you had been wearing it just the other day, but Nate didn’t need to know that.

“I thought you forgot about that,” you said.

“How could I forget about that? You cut off half of my sweatshirt!”

Your loud laugh caught the attention of EJ, who came over to throw an arm around each of your shoulders. 

“Alright, you two,” he said, dragging you back towards the rest of the team, “no more secret conversations. If Y/N is yelling at Nate for something, we all wanna hear it.”

Nate ended up insisting that he drive you home, and you found that you didn’t want to fight it. EJ pulled you aside just before you followed Nate out to his car, though, and asked if you were okay with it. The concern in his eyes was endearing, if unnecessary. You assured him that you would be fine, but you could feel him watching you as you walked back to Nate, who was trying very hard to pretend to be interested in something on his phone, and followed him to his car.

Nate connected his phone to the car’s speakers, but he turned on the playlist you used when you were driving. You looked over at him, surprised, but he was resolutely focused on backing out of his parking spot. 

“I didn’t think you still followed this playlist,” you said a few minutes later, after you had listened to Nate sing along to a Bastille song, the lights of Denver flashing by the windows.

He shrugged, still not looking at you, but he turned up the volume. “I still listen to it sometimes when we go on road trips,” was all he said. 

Nate started FaceTiming you from the road again. At first, he claimed it was so he could check in on Cox, but eventually he stopped asking to talk to the dog and just sat with you for hours. More than once you woke up with your phone still in your hand, having fallen asleep while talking to Nate. 

Nate came to pick up Cox one morning in February with a Starbucks in hand for you. It was exactly your order, which made you a little suspicious.

“Not that I’m complaining,” you said as you took a drink of your coffee, “but what’s wrong with the coffee I make here?”

Nate shrugged. He always seemed too large for your small apartment kitchen, but now, with his hands in his pockets and avoiding your gaze, he looked like he was trying to take up as little space as possible. Cox was sitting at his feet.

“Nate, what’s up?” you asked, taking a step across the floor to Nate. You set your coffee cup down on the counter, which made Nate look up at you.

“Do you wanna go on a date with me?” he blurted out. His eyes went wide, like he had surprised himself. “I mean, do you- can we try this all again? I want to do it properly, so, like, will you go out with me?”

You grinned. “Is that why you brought me a Starbucks?” you asked. “Because we met in Starbucks when you took my coffee?”

Nate groaned, but all of the tension dropped out of his shoulders. “That was an accident, and you know it!”

“Mmhmm, you definitely weren’t just looking for an excuse to talk to a pretty girl.” Nate blushed, and you gasped. “You thought I was pretty!”

Nate’s face turned even redder. “Of course I did, how could I not?” Then he added, “I’ve always thought you were pretty.”

You stepped closer to Nate again and stood up on your tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek. “Yes, Nate, I’ll go out with you,” you said.

Nate grinned, wide enough that his dimple appeared, and it hit you just how much you still loved his smile. You stopped yourself from just kissing Nate right there in the middle of your kitchen, but only barely. 

Nate texted you a couple days later to tell you what time he would pick you up. When you asked what you would be doing, all he sent back was “dress warm.” You bugged him about it for a while, but you knew you would never get it out of him. 

True to his word, Nate showed up at your door just as the sun was about to set. He smiled shyly at you as you opened the door. He hovered awkwardly in the doorway as you put on your boots and grabbed your coat.

“Are you ever gonna actually tell me what we’re doing?” you asked as you locked the door.

Nate pretended to think. “Nah.” He punched the elevator button, and your hands brushed together as he brought his back to his side. Nate clenched and unclenched his fingers as the elevator door opened.

As you stepped in and turned around, you took Nate’s hand, twining your fingers together. Nate relaxed and squeezed your hand once. He held your hand all the way out to his car, and then picked it back up once he started driving.

You couldn’t count the number of times the two of you had sat just like this, Nate driving one-handed, his other hand clutching yours across the console. Nate drove into the sunset, out of the city, the only sound in the car the radio and Nate’s occasional curse at another driver. It was a calm, comfortable silence, different than it had been recently with Nate. More like how it had been before. 

Nate drove you all the way out to a field somewhere in the middle of who-knows-where, Colorado. He told you not to move before he climbed out of the car and started pulling things out of the backseat. You couldn’t tell what he was doing out in front of the car in the twilight. 

When Nate finally came to open your door and help you out of the car, you smirked at him. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you drove me all the way out here just to kill me,” you said.

Nate rolled his eyes and tugged your hand harder than necessary, causing you to stumble forward into his chest. He wrapped an arm around your waist to steady you; he was warm against the late winter air. When he looked down at you, his breath came out in a faint cloud. It seemed like any retort he had died on his lips. 

Nate stared down at you for a moment, still holding you to his chest. Then he seemed to shake himself, taking a half step back and taking your hand in his again. He didn’t say anything as he led you over to a blanket he’d spread out on the ground. Nate sat and pulled you down between his legs to lean against his chest.

When he spoke, you could feel his chest vibrating underneath your back. “It’s not much, but we’ve done all the typical dates already. I thought we could just watch the stars for a while.” 

You twisted around to press a kiss to Nate’s jaw. “It’s a perfect idea, Nate.” Even in the dark, you could see Nate’s cheeks turn pink.

“I brought hot chocolate, too,” he said. You hummed and snuggled in against Nate’s chest more. 

He draped another blanket over you before wrapping his arms around you. It wasn’t quite dark enough to see stars yet, so you closed your eyes and just reveled in the fact that you were there, with Nate, and for a moment, you could let yourself forget that everything had changed. You could smell Nate’s cologne, familiar and comforting, and his heartbeat was a steady rhythm beneath you. Nate tucked his nose against your neck, and that’s how the two of you sat for a long time, letting the darkness grow around you.

You shivered; the temperature had dropped with the sun, and even Nate, a walking furnace, could only do so much. 

“Here,” he said, shifting you a little bit so he could reach for the Thermos of hot chocolate. He unscrewed the cap before handing it to you.

You took a long drink, letting the warmth flow through you before handing it back to Nate. You blinked, trying to focus on the stars; you weren’t the greatest with constellations, but you had learned some of them when you were younger. 

Nate followed your gaze and pointed. “That one’s Orion, isn’t it?” You followed Nate’s finger to the three stars that made up Orion’s Belt and nodded. “That and the Big Dipper are the only ones I know,” he said.

“The Big Dipper is actually part of Ursa Major, which is a bear,” you said, tracing out the rest of it with your finger. Nate made an interested noise behind you. You looked back at Orion, following it towards Sirius and Canis Major. “That really bright one is Sirius, the Dog Star.” Nate pressed a kiss to your temple, and you smiled. You paused before pointing at another constellation. “I think that’s Pegasus, with the square, and above it is Cassiopeia.”

“I’m gonna be honest,” Nate murmured, “I can’t really tell what you’re looking at, but the stars are pretty, and I could listen to you talk forever.” He rested his chin on your shoulder. 

“I don’t really know that many more constellations,” you admitted, but you suddenly remembered an old folk myth you had been told every summer as a kid at summer camp about how the stars were created. You started telling it to Nate, carefully so you didn’t leave anything out; you could never tell the story the same way you had grown up hearing it, but Nate seemed invested, anyway.

You spoke quietly in the dark field, the whole world seeming hushed and far away. Nate’s arms tightened around you once you had finished the story. He kissed your temple again, and the two of you fell into a comfortable silence again, until Nate gasped and poked you in the side repeatedly.

“A shooting star!” he said, still poking you. A star had, in fact, streaked across the sky above you. 

“Yes, Nathan, I saw it, now stop poking me!”

“You’re supposed to make a wish, babe,” he said.

You sighed and closed your eyes. There, sitting on the cold ground in a field, wrapped up in Nate and his warmth, you couldn’t imagine ever wishing for anything else. You would give anything for this moment to last forever, for moments like this to become commonplace in your life again.

You sat out under the stars for a little while longer before you started shivering again. Nate laughed at you when he helped you up.

“Shut up, not all of us can be a walking heater,” you said.

“Go sit in the car, I’ll clean everything up, “ he told you, kissing your forehead.

The drive back into Denver was nothing like the drive out of the city. You took Nate’s phone and opened his Spotify, searching for your own playlist. Nate groaned when he saw what you were doing, but let you turn up the volume. You both spent the entire car ride singing along to the songs that came on at the top of your lungs. 

Nate didn’t kiss you when he left you at your apartment door, but he did duck his head and shoot you a shy smile when you told him you’d like to do that again, and it was a start for both of you.

More dates kept getting scheduled, hikes on days off, takeout and a movie on nights in, impromptu ones where Nate showed up at your work with lunch. Nate would ask you about work, or your family, and it really was just like you were getting to know each other all over again. You convinced Nate to start a new show one night, and you ended up binging a whole season, even though he had morning skate and a game the next day. You watched it together again over FaceTime the next weekend, and then it became a standing date. You argued more than once when Nate watched an episode or two without you, but it always ended with smiles and a promise that he wouldn’t do it again. Cox seemed overjoyed that his people were back together, and he always met you at Nate’s front door, his whole body wagging with excitement. 

Mel finally convinced you to come over for a girls night while the Avs were on their California trip. You had been lied to a little bit, as you had been under the impression that all of the girls would be over, but when you showed up at the Landeskog’s house, it was just Mel and Linnea, a box of pizza, and a bottle of your favorite wine. 

“I was led here under false pretenses,” you griped, but you gave Linnea a kiss and swiped a piece of pizza, anyway. 

“Is this a good idea? What we’re doing?” you asked Mel during the second intermission. Mel took a drink of her wine instead of answering. “Mel, answer me, please,” you begged, poking her with your foot.

Mel pursed her lips, eyes carefully focused on the TV. “I’m not going to pretend to know what’s good for either of you,” she said. “But I do know that you’ve both been happier since Christmas. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I were you. But Nate seems like he’s trying so hard, and he’s been asking Gabe for advice all the time. If anything, I think he’s proved that he’s willing to try to change, and I think he’s done a pretty good job at it, too.”

You rubbed Zoey’s ears thoughtfully. “The longer we try to fix this, the more normal it seems. It’s not stilted or awkward anymore. I’m just afraid I’m going to get comfortable again, and I won’t be able to come back from all of this a second time.”

“For what it’s worth,” Mel said, finishing her wine. “Gabe and EJ tell me that he won’t ever go out with the team after games on the road, anymore. Some shit about wanting to set a good example for the younger guys, but even Cale goes out every once in a while.”

You thought about the last time you had seen Cale drunk, all rosy cheeks and awkward limbs, and giggled; Nate had been responsible for getting him home, and he’d ended up crashing in your guest room, and then he laid around all day nursing a hangover. Then you thought about how Nate had started FaceTiming you from hotel rooms again, always at the exact same time, without fail. Maybe you shouldn’t have been surprised that Nate had sworn off the dive bars they went to in every city. 

The game started back up, and you and Mel refocused, letting the conversation die in favor of yelling at the TV.

You started going to games more often again, not every game, but as many as you could handle. You were no longer anxious every time you stood waiting for Nate in the hallway after a game, and he still shot you one of those small, shy smiles every time he saw you. You always told him when you’d be at games now, but he seemed to be surprised every time he saw you outside the locker room, like you would decide you’d had enough, would give up on him. You went out with the boys a couple of times, too, after some particularly fun wins. Nate stuck close to you the entire night those times, plastered to your side, keeping an eye on you when you went to dance or get another drink. 

You heard the boys chirping him about it when they thought you weren’t listening. It was all gentle really, teasing him for guarding you, the old comments about how gone he was for you. You liked the way he blushed all the way up to his ears when they teased him. 

Every time you got ready for your game, the jersey in the back of your closet seemed to be taunting you. The girls were getting less subtle about the looks they gave you when you showed up to games without it. At least you had dug your Avs baseball cap out. 

It was nearing the end of the season, and the Avs were still sitting comfortably at the top of the Conference, just cruising into the playoffs. It was the middle of March before you looked at that jersey with the A on the front and MacKinnon sprawled across the back and tugged it off the hanger and over your head.

Mel didn’t say anything when you climbed into her car, but you saw the small smile before she turned and started driving again. 

The Avs ended up losing. Nate looked dejected when he came out of the locker room, but then he glanced up and saw you standing there in his jersey; he did a double take before you were being swept up in his arms.

Nate hugged you tightly, pressing his face into your hair. You could hear the rest of the boys coming out of the locker room, but the world condensed until it was just you and Nate, wrapped up in each other, warm and safe. You didn’t want to pull away.

Eventually, EJ yelled something about sharing your attention, and you broke apart. Nate had knocked your hat off in his haste, and you quickly dried the few tears that had slipped out as he bent to pick it up. Nate placed it backwards on your head and pressed a kiss to your forehead.

“I was afraid I’d never get to see you wearing my number again,” he whispered before EJ was on you.

This year, when April rolled around, the Avalanche didn’t go home quietly to lick their wounds and recover. No, they were back in the playoffs, and they were back with a vengeance. 

“Hey, you’ll- will you come to the playoff games?” Nate asked one afternoon just before Round One started. 

You were lying on his couch with Cox on your chest. You both looked up at Nate’s words, and you craned your neck around to see Nate better where he was standing behind you.

“Do you want me to come to the games?” you asked, a little confused. Nate shuffled his feet and shoved his hands deeper into his sweatpant pockets. 

“Only if you want to,” he muttered. 

You turned fully then, causing Cox to jump off and pout at you. You reached out and grabbed one of Nate’s wrists and pulled him closer to you. He towered over you from your spot on the couch.

“I will be at every single game, and I will be cheering for you while wearing your name across my back,” you told him. Nate blinked down at you. You squeezed his hand and stood up. Nate was still staring after you as you walked out of the living room.

If someone had asked you in August or even October where you’d be if the Avs made it to the playoffs, you could’ve never told them the right answer. You could have never imagined that you would be walking into Pepsi Center for Game 1 against the Oilers, much less that you had been looking forward to this night for days. Your coworkers had all made fun of you that morning because you hadn’t been able to focus at all. They even caught you smiling at your phone when Nate had texted you around lunchtime, telling you how excited he was to see you after the game.

You weren’t going to live that down any time soon. 

You changed into your jersey before leaving work, drove straight to the Pepsi Center, and made it just in time to catch some of warm-ups. Mel pulled you aside as soon as you had said your hellos to everyone and thrust a denim playoff jacket with MacKinnon on the back at you.

“Mel,” you warned.

“Shut up,” she said, shaking the jacket at you. “I know you two still have some issues, but you are dating again, so you’re wearing the fucking jacket.”

You stuck your tongue out at Mel, but took the jacket. It was cute, you thought, looking closer at it. And it was true, you were still moving slowly, but you were technically dating Nate. Mel was still looking pointedly at you with her arms crossed, so you sighed and tugged the jacket on over your jersey. 

The other girls all squealed when you rejoined them, and you lost track of the number of pictures that were taken. You didn’t hesitate to edit your favorites and post them to your Instagram, MacKinnon proudly spread across your shoulders. 

They won, but it was close, and chippy and chirpy as playoff games always were. The boys on the ice were feeding off the energy of the crowd, and the crowd was feeding off the energy of the boys. It was a fight, but the Avalanche left the ice with a win at the end of the night.

The energy was still high, but carefully controlled, by the time all the families made it down to the locker room. One of the double doors stood ajar, and through it you could see the boys bouncing around, all in various states of undress, blasting music and yelling.

Nate was still grinning when he finally made his way out to you. He wrapped you up in a hug without taking a good look at you, but when he let you go, he caught sight of the jacket you were still wearing. He grabbed you by the shoulders and spun you around once before twisting you to face him again.

“Jesus, Mack, you’re making me dizzy, babe,” you laughed.

Nate just hugged you again, this time tighter than the last. 

The series with the Oilers went to seven games, because of course it did. You were starting to suspect that at least three different Avalanche players were secretly nursing injuries, but ignoring them, because of course they were. 

Nate asked you to come over the night before Game 7. He was quiet while he cooked dinner, and even your forced attempts at conversation while you ate fell flat. When Nate stood up and dropped his plate into the sink with a clatter, you jumped up and grabbed his arm, made him face you.

“Nate, I’m not doing this again. You asked me to come over, I’m here, and you’re all shut down like you were all last year.” Something like pain and sadness flashed across Nate’s face. “So you’re either going to talk to me, or I’m going home,” you said. 

Nate rubbed a hand across his face, and he suddenly looked very tired. “I know, I’m sorry, fuck, I’m just worried.”

You wrapped your arms around Nate’s waist and felt him lean into you. “Do you wanna watch Brooklyn Nine-Nine?”

Nate nodded and let you lead him into the living room, but pulled his phone out as soon as he sat down. You had a feeling he was rereading scouting reports again.

“Nope,” you said, plucking his phone out of his hands and locking it. Nate gaped at you for a second before he lunged. You held the phone behind your back, but Nate grabbed you around the waist and threw you onto the couch. He grinned down at you for a moment before he was tickling you, making you giggle and squirm.

“Nate, stop!” you gasped. “You’re not gonna get your phone back.” 

Nate paused, his eyes looking deep into yours. He was still leaning over you, your legs twisted together, and you could feel his breath against your cheeks. He pressed a kiss to your nose.

You found yourself wanting to close the distance between you, kiss Nate for real, but you weren’t sure if you were there yet. 

He hovered over you for a minute more in silence; you hardly dared to breathe. And then Cox barked at something outside, and the moment was over. Nate rolled off of you, but he tugged you up until you were cuddled into his side.

It was another close game the next night, but the team always seemed to play better at home, when the screaming crowd was screaming for them, not against. You watched anxiously as Nate stood on the blue line during the anthems, shuffling his skates back and forth, but he seemed calm, focused. 

When the final buzzer sounded, and the Avs won, you were already on your feet with the rest of Pepsi Center; you weren’t sure you had sat down the entire game.

You jumped into Nate’s arms outside of the locker room, his teammates’ shouts echoing off of the walls around you. 

“I’m so proud of you,” you whispered.

The Avs went down 2-0 to start the second round. You hadn’t been able to make it to the second game because you got stuck at work late, but you had watched from home; you wore your MacKinnon jersey, even though no one was around to see you. It wasn’t a pretty game, either. The Avs had been sloppy and took a lot of penalties, and you could see Nate’s frustration through your TV.

You weren’t surprised, then, when Nate showed up at your apartment door, still in his game-day suit, but looking rumpled and more than a little upset. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to, because you just turned and let him follow you into your apartment.

“Do you want food?” you asked. “I doubt I have anything diet approved, but there’s ice cream and popcorn.”

But Nate shook his head, kicking off his dress shoes and stripping his suit jacket. “Can I change?” he asked instead, holding up a small bag you hadn’t even noticed at first. 

You just nodded and settled on the couch to wait while Nate made his way to your bathroom. When he came back in a hoodie and sweatpants, he looked distinctly less stiff, but there was still something like pain in his eyes.

“C’mere,” you said softly, tugging him onto the couch with you. You let Nate maneuver the two of you until you were on your back with Nate squarely on your chest, your arms wrapped around his shoulders. Only then could you feel some of the tension in his back and shoulders start to disappear.

The minutes passed in silence for a while before Nate spoke. “Did you watch?”

“Uh-huh,” you replied, idly rubbing Nate’s back in circles. 

“Was it as bad as it seemed on the ice?”

You paused. “Worse. You guys were a mess,” you said honestly. Nate sighed and pressed his face deeper into your chest. “What happened? We all know you guys are better than that.”

Nate shrugged as best as he could from his position on top of you. Honestly, he made for a great weighted blanket, but he was starting to crush you a little.  “Would you come to the games this weekend? If I got you a plane ticket?” he asked suddenly. “I know you have to work on Friday, and you don’t have to if you don’t want to, but-”

You moved your hand into Nate’s hair, and he stopped talking. When he lifted his head and rested his chin on your collarbone, he looked nervous. You carded your fingers through his hair, once, twice, watching Nate’s eyes close before you answered with a question of your own. “Do you want me there?” you asked. It wasn’t the first time you had asked Nate this question since the playoffs had started, but you needed to hear the words straight from his mouth. Needed to hear him say he wanted you, needed you, that whatever was happening between you wasn’t one-sided. 

This time, Nate didn’t look away from your eyes when he answered you. “Yes.”

You insisted that Nate stay the night, although he didn’t put up much of a fight. You had eventually turned on a movie, and he had started smiling more, but you could still see the desolate look in his eyes. You had seen a lot of that look last season.

You were laying in the dark, both of you on your sides facing each other. Nate’s eyes were closed, but you could tell he wasn’t asleep yet. You were busy tracing the lines in his forehead, his jawline hidden beneath the playoff beard, wondering what he would do if you reached out for real and touched his face, when he asked you a question.

“Do you think we can do this?” His eyes were open now, that blue you loved so much clouded with doubt.

You did reach out and touch Nate’s face then, brushing your thumb across the creases in his forehead and then his cheek. “I know you can do this,” you said confidently. That confidence must have shown through in your voice, because Nate lifted his hand to yours and smiled at you.

You fell asleep holding hands. 

St. Louis was hot. It was still only late spring, but it was humid as hell as soon as you stepped off the plane. You had managed to take Friday off, and Nate had pulled some strings to get you a room in the team hotel on short notice, but you still had to fly in and Uber to the hotel on your own.

Nate hugged you hello, but it was Burky who dragged you off to take a pregame nap with him. You grinned at Nate over your shoulder, and you were pleased that he looked distinctly disgruntled.

Enterprise Center was just as loud as the Pepsi Center had been during Round 1. You stood out in your burgundy jersey in a mass of blue. You got some looks as you made your way through the concourse towards your seat. You wondered vaguely if Nate had to call in any favors with Brayden or Ryan to get you tickets to the games. You weren’t sure when you had last been to a hockey game without the rest of the Avs’ WAGs by your side; it felt strange to be alone. 

Nate’s eyes searched the crowd during warm-ups. He finally found you and smiled stupidly at you, until Burky went flying into him, and they both went sprawling. 

The Avalanche won, 3-0 in a game that silenced the crowd at Enterprise.

Nate hadn’t been able to get you a VIP pass, so you made your way out onto the street with the rest of the fans, except you were the only one excited that the Blues had lost. Nate texted you while you waited for an Uber: “wait up for me at the hotel?”

You smiled down at your phone. “of course.”

You were still in the hotel lobby when the team poured off the bus. They were loud still, and you could tell that they were lighter than they had been earlier that night. EJ beat everyone else over to you. 

“Y/N, you’re officially our good luck charm, and you’re never allowed to miss another game,” he told you. 

You laughed and leaned into EJ’s side. “I’ll be sure to tell my work that,” you said. 

EJ rested his chin on the top of your head as you both watched several of his teammates play-fight near the doors. “Who knows, maybe they’ll thank you for it.”

Nate made his way over to the two of you. He was laughing at something Gravy was saying, and you took a moment to look at how his eyes crinkled when he laughed like that. 

“Trying to steal my girl, Eej?” he asked, wrapping an arm around your waist. 

You tried not to think about how pleased it made you feel to hear Nate call you his girl again. 

“Always,” EJ replied easily, but let you go to follow Nate to the elevators. 

As the doors closed behind you, Nate pulled you close. “Thank you for coming tonight,” he mumbled. 

You tilted your head up to look at him and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. “I wouldn’t dream of being anywhere else right now,” you told him, and you meant it. 

You dragged a bunch of the boys to the zoo the next morning. JT sat on a bench in the butterfly house long enough that a butterfly landed on his hat. Josty, on the other hand, was weirdly fascinated by all of the insects, and you had to tell him more than once not to run inside. EJ and Cale complained until you went into the penguin house. You had to tell Z that he was almost certainly too big to fit on the train, but you couldn’t convince any of them that they couldn’t go on the carousel; they insisted you go on it with them. You took a great video of a highly-amused Burky playing with the seals at the glass. 

Nate held your hand the entire time you walked. When you pulled your phone out to take the video of Burky, you found that you had several texts from the boys, all pictures of you and Nate. Nate tugging your hand to go look at the elephants. Nate smiling at you while you laughed at Tyson. Nate reaching for you while you sat next to him on the carousel.

You saved all of them to your camera roll. 

The Avs won the next night, too, and suddenly the series was tied. Nate asked you to come to his hotel room after the game, and you both fell asleep while watching a movie. 

The Pepsi Center was deafening on the night of Game 5, and soon the Avs were up 3-2 in the series, instead of being on the verge of elimination. The team was playing with a new energy, too, and you thought they may have been yelling louder than the crowd when Mikko scored to end it in overtime. 

They went back to St. Louis, and Nate FaceTimed you from his hotel room. You could hear EJ and Gabe arguing over what to order from room service in the background. 

“I miss you,” Nate said when you answered the call.

“We miss you, too!” Gabe yelled from somewhere on the other side of the room. Nate rolled his eyes.

When EJ flopped down on the bed next to Nate, he groaned, but let him rest his head on his shoulder to talk to you too. 

You watched alone from your couch as they fought through Game 6. You stopped breathing for a while when Cale took a bad hit and disappeared off the bench for part of the second period, but he came back and scored a goal during his first shift. Burky scored a goal, too, and you thought for a minute he was going to fight Brayden Schenn until Nate stepped in. The game was still tied going into the third, and then it was halfway through the third, and then suddenly the puck was flying off Naz’s stick and landing neatly in the net behind Binnington. 

Your scream might have woken a few neighbors.

Nate FaceTimed you from the locker room, and soon your screen was filled with the sweaty, but happy, faces of the boys, all clamoring to say hi to you. Nate eventually fought them off, and it was just him and his broad shoulders on your phone, and you wished you were there to hug him. 

You all watched from Gabe’s house as San Jose beat the Flames in 7, and the Conference Finals became a rematch of the 2019 playoffs. 

André got injured in Game 1, some lower body thing that had probably been bothering him for weeks, but eventually his leg gave out on the ice. He showed up at your apartment door the way Nate had in the second round. 

“Nate said something about comfort cuddles?” was what he said when you pulled open your door and raised an eyebrow at him. 

“Come in here, you idiot,” you said. 

You tried not to notice how he limped through your doorway and into your living room. He flopped gracelessly onto your couch, curls peeking out from underneath his baseball hat. 

“Do you want junk food?” you asked as he pouted at you. He nodded, still shooting you sad looks as he clutched a pillow to his chest. You sighed at him, shaking your head fondly, and went to retrieve a tub of cookie dough ice cream from the fridge and a couple spoons from the drawer.

You threw the spoon at Burky, and he caught it, a small smirk on his face now. “You eat ice cream out of the tub often?” he asked.

“How do you think I got through breaking up with Nate?” you replied, peeling off the lid and digging out a chunk of cookie dough with your spoon.

Out of the corner of your eye, you could see André’s face fall, and he winced; you didn’t think it was because of the injury. “Shit, sorry,” he murmured, reaching across you to get his own spoonful of ice cream. He dropped his head to rest on your shoulder. “He talks about you all the time, y’know. He always used to, but it stopped last season, and we never knew why. Then all of a sudden after Christmas, it started again.” You ate your ice cream thoughtfully. “He’s so much happier now. We could have the worst fucking game ever, but he knows he has you again, so it’s okay.”

You rested your head on top of Burky’s. “I wasn’t sure this was a good idea. But, fuck, it feels good, it feels right, Bura.”

Burky hummed; his spoon scraped the bottom of the cardboard carton. “You’re out of ice cream,” he said. You flicked his nose. “I’m glad you’re back. We missed you,” he added softly. 

You knocked his hat off so you could play with his curls. They were grown out, and honestly you would take any excuse to play with them. He melted into you as you carded your fingers through his hair. He looked young sitting there on your couch, and you had to remind yourself that he was older than Nate, that he’d already won a Cup with the Caps.

André came over again to watch Game 2 with you, instead of watching alone from the press box. You sat curled into his chest on the couch, until Gabe scored a goal and he jumped up, knocking you off his lap and onto the floor. You had pouted at him as he helped you up, laughing his ass off, but from then on you just stretched your feet into his lap.

The Avs had won Games 1 and 2, and you could all feel the tension and frustration that San Jose was facing– you had all felt it yourselves just a couple of weeks before. Ashley’s nails dug into your arm as you watched Naz mouthing off to a Sharks player, his old beef with Joe Thornton spilling over, about to drop the gloves, but the refs stepped in– a couple of you booed a little, but Ashley’s grip just tightened– and it was over. Except it wasn’t, because then Naz got hit behind the play, and you were starting to think Ashley was drawing blood, even as Naz got up, albeit a little slowly, a little dazed. It wasn’t until he came back onto the ice for his next shift that she let go, but she did also sigh and say, “I need a stronger drink,” before swallowing the last of her wine in one big gulp.

They split the road games. The team plane landed in Denver in the late afternoon, and Nate came straight to your apartment to pick up Cox. He ended up coming inside and accidentally took a nap with you on the couch. He stayed for dinner, too, and only left reluctantly at the end of the night. 

Nate scored a hat trick in Game 5. You flung your hat down onto the ice with the rest of Pepsi Center, screaming with Mel as Gabe and Mikko tackled him to the ice. There was still time left on the clock, but it didn’t matter, because the game was as good as won.

 The Colorado Avalanche were going to the Stanley Cup Finals. 

Nate swept you up in a giant hug outside the locker room, spinning you around and squeezing you until you couldn’t breathe, but you never wanted to let go.

You reached up to cup his cheek– and that playoff beard that was still going very strong– and beamed at him. “I told you you could do this,” you told him, just see his grin turn shy. “And you owe me a new hat.”

“I will buy you any hat you want,” Nate promised, but then Josty swept past you and jammed a hat on your head. You took it off to look at it: Western Conference Champions. “But I kinda like the way that one looks on you. 

Nate asked you to come over the next night to watch the Eastern Conference Finals, Pens against the Flyers. He paced around the house through the entire pregame show, and you and Cox watched him, bemused, from the couch. 

“You good over there, babe?” you asked as Nate stood next to you and looked anywhere but the TV. 

“What if I don’t want the Pens to win this?” he blurted. You raised an eyebrow at him. “You know I love Sid, but I don’t know if I could handle facing him in the Finals.” 

You laughed a little and made him sit down on the couch next to you. “I’m sure Sid will forgive you,” you told him. 

He may not have wanted to face off against his best friend and childhood hero in the Cup Finals, but that didn’t stop him from cheering when Sid scored a goal, or cussing out Konecny for a dirty hit. It didn’t matter, though, because no matter how fast or angry the Pens were, the Flyers were faster and angrier. The Pens weren’t about to go down without a fight, but an empty net goal from Giroux with less than a minute left sealed their fate. Nate texted Sid an apology while you watched the teams shake hands on the ice, and you knew he meant it, but you could also see how he relaxed for the first time all night. 

Sid showed up in Denver with Nate’s family just before the Cup Finals started. 

“Didn’t feel like going home yet,” was the only excuse he offered, but you both knew how much it meant to Nate that he was there. 

Nate’s family stayed in a hotel, but Sid moved into the guest bedroom. A bunch of your things had started to migrate from your apartment and into that guest room, so you carried them into Nate’s bedroom. Nate watched with his arms crossed from the doorway, pretending to be stoic, but his cheeks were pink.

You were in the kitchen later, making lunch, when Nate came in and hovered near you. You bumped him out of the way with your hip.

“Can I help you?” you asked.

“Do you wanna just stay over here during the Finals?” he mumbled, fidgeting with the drawstring on his hoodie. “It’ll be easier, since you’re going to all the games and stuff, to just come over here at the end of the night.”

You looked up at him; he looked back at you from underneath his eyelashes. “Sure,” you replied, going back to making your lunch. You already had a toothbrush at Nate’s, anyway. “I’ll have to go get some clothes later, though.”

Nate mumbled a “Cool,” before kissing the top of your head and leaving.

Sid came in a minute later and raised his eyebrows at you. You just pointed your knife threateningly at him. 

You had never seen the Pepsi Center so loud. The noise had been deafening throughout the playoffs, but it had reached a fever pitch for the Cup Finals. Even when it was quiet, it wasn’t silent, a constant buzz of excited voices filling the arena.

You stood with the rest of the WAGs, in your jersey and denim jacket, Nate’s family and Sid by your side, and you caught yourself thinking that this was somewhere you wanted to be for the rest of your life. 

They lost Game 1, but Nate still smiled when you met him outside the locker room. He and EJ were both moving gingerly after a weird three-way collision with a Flyers player in the second. EJ still wrapped you in a hug, though, even if he groaned when Sammy plastered himself across his back. 

“You’re supposed to be our good luck charm, Y/N, what the fuck?” he teased. You dug your elbow into his bruised ribs in response. “Geez, I forgot how mean you are to all of us,” he said, rubbing his side. 

Nate laughed, settled his hands on your hips. You stuck your tongue out at EJ. 

“Wanna head home?”  he murmured, resting his chin on your shoulder. 

“Want me to drive?” you asked. Josty, who was walking past, stopped and raised his eyebrows, but JT dragged him away. Nate just pressed his keys into your hand. 

Nate wasn’t quiet on the drive home like you’d expected. He didn’t stop talking from the time the car door closed behind him until you pulled into his driveway. He complained about the Flyers, the refs, his own playing. It had been a while since Nate just let himself complain about hockey to you. It was nice to hear it again. 

Nate pulled you close in the dark that night, and you fell asleep wrapped up in his arms, wearing one of his T-shirts. 

When they won Game 2, you thought the Can was going to explode. 

The team plane left the next morning for Philadelphia. All of the wives and girlfriends piled onto a plane of your own and followed them. You took a nap in Nate’s hotel room in a pile with Cale and Burky while Nate watched film.

The Flyers seemed more powerful in front of their own crowd. They hit harder and chirped meaner, and all of their fans in orange yelled for them. Nate left after a slash to the wrist in Game 3, and the Flyers used that to their advantage. He was back the next night, but the Flyers still took both home games.

Nate was tense when you made it home to Denver. You and Sid shared looks behind his back when he came home late from skate, or sat down immediately after dinner to watch game film again. He was still icing his wrist. 

“Rock, paper, scissors?” Sid whispered to you as you both stood in the hallway and looked in on Nate. He had the TV on and his iPad in his lap and gave absolutely no indication that he knew you were watching him.

“I had to do this all last season,” you hissed back. “It’s your turn, Crosby!”

“You’re his girlfriend!”

“You’re his best friend!”

“I can hear you two,” Nate called, his eyes still not leaving the video in front of him. Okay, maybe your whispered argument with Sid wasn’t as quiet as you’d thought it was. “What time is it?”

Sid said, “Late,” at the same time you said, “Bedtime.” You looked at each other and tried not to burst out giggling. Nate sighed, but he turned off the TV and tossed his iPad onto the couch cushions. 

“I’ll meet you upstairs, yeah?” he said, kissing your forehead and holding up the now-melted ice pack he’d been using. You must’ve given him a skeptical look, because he chuckled and added, “I promise. And I’m sorry, I lost track of time.”

You used Nate’s shoulder for balance as you stood on your tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek. As much as you loved the beard and the playoffs, you couldn’t wait for him to shave; you were getting tired of kissing that. 

If the Flyers thought they would have it easy coming back to Denver, that the Avalanche would go down without a fight, they were very much mistaken. In fact, there was an actual fight early in Game 5, between Farabee and Calvert, over who knows what, but it was enough to energize the Avs straight to 6 goals. They took the next game in Philly, too, though the score was a lot closer.

Soon, you were back in Denver, and it was the day before Game 7. Nate was quiet all day, and you and Sid mostly left him to himself. He went to practice, and you went to lunch with Sarah. You came home, and Nate was heading out for a run. 

You were taking your laundry out of the dryer and resigning yourself to going to bed alone when Nate came and found you. He wrapped his arms around your waist from behind, pressing himself along your back and burying his face in your neck. You rested your hands on his and leaned back into him

When he spoke, his beard tickled your neck. “I’m sorry I’ve been shitty, I’m just- what if we can’t win this?”

You turned in Nate’s arms and wrapped your arms around his neck. You were still holding one of his socks. “No matter what happens tomorrow night, your family will still love you. Your team will still love you. Denver will still love you. I will still love you.” You pressed a kiss to Nate’s temple.

You stood there, in the middle of the laundry room, for several more minutes. When Nate pulled back, his eyes were shining, but neither of you said anything more.

Later that night, you pulled Nate into your chest in bed, letting him be the little spoon. He sighed contentedly and relaxed into you. You pressed a kiss to his shoulder. 

As you were drifting off to sleep, you heard Nate whisper, “I love you, too.”

When Nate left for the game the next afternoon, he didn’t kiss you, but it was a near thing. You weren’t sure what was holding you back anymore. You liked that Nate seemed to be waiting for you to decide. 

Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final was the most stressed you’d ever felt. You wanted to live in the moment forever. 

Sid sat next to you and let you squeeze his arm when you got nervous. Mel was on your other side, and she smacked you every time Nate or Gabe touched the puck, which was often, as if your eyes weren’t glued to the ice every second. Someone brought you a beer during the first intermission, but it went mostly untouched.

The game was a tame one, or about as tame as a Game 7 in the Stanley Cup Finals could be. Penalties went uncalled, and tempers were flaring. It was tied going into the second, and then again going into the third, even though both teams scored two more goals in the second period. Your hand was beginning to cramp from where you held onto Sid’s forearm, but all he did was take your hand in his after a while; you kept squeezing until you were sure even his fingers were numb.

And then Giroux high-sticked Gabe and made him bleed. There was no looking the other way from that, Giroux was sent to the box with a double minor, and suddenly the Avs were on a power play halfway through the third period. They didn’t need the full four minutes, though. They didn’t even need a full minute before Nate was on a breakaway, and the puck was up above Hart’s shoulder and safely in the net between one breath and the next. 

You screamed with the rest of Pepsi Center, but yours were mixed with a few tears, too.

You still didn’t relax, felt like you couldn’t breathe, because it wasn’t over until that final buzzer. 

You watched the clock tick down above center ice. Twenty seconds; you were on the edge of your seat. Ten seconds; you were on your feet. Five seconds; you were screaming. Zero seconds; you were hugging Mel and Sid and anyone else you could get your arms around.

You weren’t sure if you were screaming or crying, anymore. Nate looked up to where you were sitting, and you were sure you’d never seen him smile that big before. 

The Flyers filed off the ice, and you spared a half second to feel bad, because they had wanted this just as badly, but then you saw Nate and André hugging and yelling in each other’s faces. You thought about everything you’d gone through the last two seasons, and you thought that, just maybe, the Avalanche deserved this. 

A hush fell over the arena as Gabe skated over to pick up the Cup, but it exploded again as he lifted it over his head for the first time. When he handed it off to Nate next, and Nate kissed it before lifting it over his head, you were definitely crying, but you also couldn’t stop smiling. 

Everyone insisted that you come down to the ice, though a part of you wondered if you still counted, if you deserved to be there, too. Nate was hanging off of EJ when you stepped onto the ice with his parents, but he looked up and saw you. His face split into an even bigger grin than before. Without thinking, really, you launched yourself at Nate, and then you were both tumbling to the ice. 

Nate was sweaty and still entirely in all of his pads, but his arms were wrapped around you and that was all that mattered. You thought he was going to kiss you lying there on the ice, but he didn’t, just helped you up and let you latch onto him again.

“I am so fucking proud of you, Nathan MacKinnon,” you yelled in his ear, standing at center ice.

Nate went home to Cole Harbour, and you stayed in Denver. Except this summer, he texted you every day and called you most nights. From his couch with Cox by his side, from the dock under the stars, from Sid’s deck with a couple of beers. Not a day went by where you didn’t talk to Nate. 

You missed him, and you loved him, but this summer it was different. You wished you’d told him before he left, but there had been parties, and a parade, and a lot of alcohol, and it had never seemed like the right time. So you’d stayed quiet, resisted the urge to kiss Nate in front of all of Denver, to tell the world that he was yours, that your heart was his. 

You missed him, and you loved him, and you had to hold yourself back from ending every phone call with those three words, because he was in another country halfway across the continent, and it wouldn’t feel right to say it unless you were in his arms. 

You wondered if he knew, when you fell silent on FaceTime and just watched him talk with a smile on your face. You wondered if he could see the love in your eyes again, if it had ever really gone away. 

You wondered if, somehow, you’d missed your chance. 

Nate’s day with the Cup came in the beginning of August. He asked if you would come. You told him you couldn’t get off work. 

You booked a plane ticket to Halifax. 

You made Sid come pick you up from the airport. He didn’t love that he was being forced to keep a secret from Nate, but he gave you a warm hug when he saw you anyway. 

“Do you know what you’re gonna say?” he asked after you’d climbed into his truck and were making your way towards Nate’s house. 

You laughed. Sid had rolled the windows down, and your hair blew out the window and into the August air. “Nope. I’ve been thinking about this all summer, I flew all the way out here, and I have no clue what I’m going to say to Nate. ‘Surprise? I love you!’ What if he doesn’t even want me here?”

Sid scoffed. You turned to glare at him. “I have had to listen to Nate complain every single day that you’re not here. It got worse after you lied and told him that you weren’t coming for tomorrow. At one point, he even pretended to be offended that you wouldn’t even come for my birthday.” He took his eyes off the road to look at you. “Nate wants you here, Y/N. Hell, I think you’re the only person he wants here.”

You played with your necklace; it was the necklace Nate had given you a lifetime ago. Sid’s gaze followed your fingers. “I just wasn’t sure for so long, Sid. What if I made him wait too long? What if he moved on?”

“I promise you, he hasn’t. I don’t think he ever would.”

Sid pulled up in front of Nate’s house then, put his truck in park, turned to look at you. You didn’t move. The sun was just starting to set over the lake, turning the sky gold and pink. 

“Get out of my car, Y/N,” Sid said softly. “He’s probably around back.”

You sighed one last time and unbuckled your seatbelt, closing the car door softly behind you. You made your way quietly around the house, hoping Cox wouldn’t bark at you. You found Nate sitting in an adirondack chair near the water and started to head towards him when you had an idea. 

You pulled your phone out and opened Nate’s contact. You didn’t hesitate before pressing the call button. You heard his FaceTime ring once, twice before the call connected and his face filled your phone screen. 

“Hey, Y/N! I was just about to call you actually,” Nate said, grinning at you. 

You suddenly hoped that you didn’t look like too much of a mess after your five hour flight. 

Nate squinted at his phone, at you. “Where are you? The sun shouldn’t be setting in Denver yet.”

“Huh? Oh, I’m, uh, not in Denver,” you said. Nate looked confused; you had started walking towards him again, were nearly right behind him. 

You would make fun of him for not realizing you were standing right behind him later. 

“Then where-” Nate cut himself off. He jumped up from his chair and spun around, finally saw you standing there. There, in Cole Harbour. 

You barely had time to hang up the call before Nate was tackling you to the grass in a hug. 

“Oof, Nate, babe, you’re crushing me a little.”

“Don’t care. You’re here!” Nate said back. Then he pushed himself up a little, rested his weight on his hands. “You’re here. What’re you doing here? I thought you said-“

You laughed, and it echoed off the quiet lake. “I decided to surprise you.”

Nate brushed your hair out of your face and rested his hand on your cheek before dipping back down and pressing his forehead to yours. “You’re really here.”

You turned your head to kiss his palm. “Yeah, Nate. I’m here.”

Nate smiled dumbly down at you for a few more minutes. If you didn’t look a mess before, you certainly did now, sprawled out on the ground in sweatpants and a T-shirt, grass in your hair. You raised your own hand to cup Nate’s cheek. He closed his eyes and tilted his head, rested it against your palm.

The sun was still setting, and you could see the sky turning colors over his head. Nate rolled off of you and settled in the grass next to you. You reached over and grabbed his hand, twining your fingers together. Above you, the sky was all kinds of pinks and purples and blues. 

“I’ve been thinking,” you said. Nate stiffened next to you. “I asked you to be patient with me. I said I couldn’t jump in headfirst. And you’ve been so good, so sweet. You’ve let me make all the decisions this time around. And you’ve waited on me for so long.”

“I would wait forever,” Nate breathed. You huffed out a laugh.

“Well, here’s the thing.” Nate looked away from the sky for the first time since you started talking and looked over at you. You rolled, pushing yourself up to straddle Nate’s hips. He propped himself up on his elbows, and you rested your hands on his shoulders, looking into Nate’s eyes. He looked apprehensive, but quietly hopeful. “I’m done waiting. I love you, Nate. I’m not sure I ever stopped. I needed you to prove that I could believe in you again. And, God, that’s all you’ve done since Christmas. From Cox, to the FaceTimes, to all of our little dates. Through the playoffs. I spent all summer wishing I’d said something before you left, stopping myself from saying something every time we talked on the phone.”

Nate’s hands had come up to rest on your waist, thumbs rubbing circles on your skin underneath your T-shirt. He still was looking at you like everything you were saying was too good to be true. 

“Can I kiss you now?” he asked.

You had enough time to nod and laugh before Nate was leaning forward and pressing his lips to yours. It was familiar and new and exhilarating all at once. It felt like coming home.

You couldn’t remember the last time you’d kissed Nate, or how long you’d been wanting, dreaming, wishing for it again. It didn’t matter anymore, though, because Nate was squeezing your hips and kissing you slowly, deeply. Like he had all the time in the world. Like he never wanted to be doing anything else. 

He eventually pulled away for air, resting his forehead against yours, your breaths mixing in the small space between you.

“I love you so much, Y/N. And I wasn’t sure I’d ever get to do that again.” He kissed you again, just a quick peck. “And now I’m never, ever gonna stop.” He started pressing kisses to your forehead, your cheeks, your nose, before coming back and kissing your lips again. 

The sun had set fully by now, and you shivered. Nate was still radiating heat, and he rubbed his hands over your bare arms. 

“Do you wanna go inside?” he asked. You shook your head, tilting your head back to look up at the stars as they appeared. “Okay, well let me go get you a sweatshirt or a blanket or something.” He tapped your thigh, and you climbed off his lap and stretched. 

Nate made his way back up to the house, and you wandered out to the end of the dock. The water was warm when you dipped your feet in. 

It wasn’t more than a couple of minutes before you heard Nate’s footsteps in the grass again. You turned and saw him carrying a familiar sweatshirt from your college. 

“Hey, wait that’s mine!” you said. 

Nate blushed. “I, uh, found it last summer, and never really gave it back.”

You grinned at Nate as you pulled the sweatshirt over your head. It smelled like him. “I just thought I left it at your house, and you got rid of it or something. But apparently you’ve been wearing it,” you teased. 

Nate blushed darker. “I sleep with it, sometimes,” he admitted. “It doesn’t smell like you anymore, but I still like it.”

You laughed. “Aw, you really are going soft, Mack.”

Nate just grabbed your hand and tugged you closer so he could kiss you again. 

“I really believed you when you said you weren’t coming for tomorrow, y’know,” Nate said quietly. “I was trying to figure out how I’d fucked up, what I’d done to make you pull away.”

You rested your head on his shoulder and played with his hand in your lap. “I always wanted to be here for your day with the Cup. I need you to know, to understand, how proud of you I am, how proud of you I’ve always been. At first, I wasn’t sure if you’d want me to come-” Nate scoffed; you elbowed him. “But then I started figuring out how I could surprise you. Besides, I missed this place.” You waved your hand vaguely towards Nate’s house and the lake. “And you, I guess,” you added.

Nate bumped your head with his shoulder. “How did you get here, anyway?” he asked.

“Sid,” you said simply.

Nate groaned. “I hate him. He told me he couldn’t golf today because he got guilted into spending time with Taylor!”

You both fell silent, just watching the stars and listening to the cicadas and frogs. 

“Hey, what did you wish for on that shooting star we saw?” you asked suddenly, your head still resting on Nate’s shoulder.

Nate looked confused for a moment before he softened. “This,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your hair. “I wanted exactly this, for you to be happy, for us to be together.” You looked up at him, and he kissed you softly again. “Winning the Cup was a nice bonus,” he added, grinning at you. 

You shoved at Nate, but it didn’t really do much. “You’re an idiot,” you said, but you were smiling fondly at him, so it kind of ruined the effect. 

“Yeah, but you love me,” he responded, pulling you into a sideways hug.

“Yeah,” you said. “I do.”

You fell asleep next to Nate, which wasn’t new, but the kiss he gave you before you closed your eyes was. 

You spent the next day with Nate, his family, and the Cup. Sid took every opportunity to talk about how good Nate is, how proud he was. You were pretty sure it was mostly just to see how flustered Nate got every single time. How he’d splutter and blush and struggle to change the subject, but someone always brought it back to hockey, because how could you not, when you were standing next to the Stanley Cup? Whenever Nate wasn’t holding the Cup with both hands, his hand was in yours, or on your hip, or at the small of your back. He would never admit it, but you could tell he was absolutely having the time of his life, basking in the glory and the attention. No longer just the second best thing to come out of Cole Harbour, if even for a moment. For the first time, Nate was in the spotlight.

And you were right by his side the whole time, in every picture, in every memory. 

That night, after everyone had gone home and the Cup had moved on, you sat next to Nate on the couch with Cox as he went through pictures that had been taken that day. Ten minutes later, your phone lit up with an Instagram notification: @mackinnnon29 tagged you in a post. You looked sideways at Nate, but his phone was down and his eyes were on the TV. You unlocked your phone.

There were two pictures on the post. Both were of you and Nate, the Cup hoisted high over his head, glinting in the sun. In the first you were just gazing up at Nate while he grinned down at you, a loving smile of your own on your face; in the second, you were kissing, your hand on his shoulder.

His caption was simple: I’ve got everything I could ever need right here next to me.

[ghstandpucks]

45 & 70 withhhhhh Josty? Or EJ 🤔 since you have lots of Nate ones already ☺️

Here’s some Josty for you girl! I hope you enjoy it! I’m slowly getting around to my prompt asks, feel free to keep sending them from this list!

Master List

45. "Now, before you get upset, I didn't lie to you. I just...failed to mention it."

70. “You know what? Never-mind, you’ll know I’m lying to you anyway.”

           You were just arriving at Tyson’s apartment after work, completely drained from your day. You loved working at the children’s hospital in Denver, but some days it could be draining. However, it was how you met your curly haired boyfriend in the first place. He was there with the Avs, spreading some joy and giving back to the community. The two of you talked throughout the day and hit it off, exchanging numbers before he left. One thing led to another and four months later here you were, outside his apartment and taking out the key he had given you so you could just let yourself in.

You paused with the key in the lock as you heard a feminine laugh come from the other side of the door. There was no way Tyson was cheating on you, that just wasn’t him. You couldn’t help the nerves that started to erupt in the pit of your stomach as you heard his laugh though, alongside another high-pitched giggle. Trusting that you knew that Tyson wouldn’t do that to you, but still bracing for the wild thoughts that were running through your mind, you opened the door. “Tyson?” you questioned walking in. In an instant Tyson was rounding the corner from his kitchen.

“Hey babe! How was work?” he asked you, placing a quick peck on your lips and taking your coat as you shrugged it off.

“It was good,” you said softly back, wondering if you should question him on what you had just heard. Before you had a chance to though, Tyson was dragging you to the kitchen.

“I want you to meet someone,” he said excitedly, and your nerves calmed a bit. If he was seeing someone else, he wouldn’t want you to meet them you thought. Thinking about it though, your nerves picked back. Who was he so excited for you to meet? Rounding the corner, you recognized the girl almost instantly; his sister Kacey. You had only seen pictures of her, but Tyson had told you all about her. Kacey walked over to you with the same amount of excitement her brother possessed and pulled you into a hug.

“It’s so nice to meet you Y/N! I’ve heard so much about you,” she squealed excitedly as she pulled back. You smiled sweetly back and returned the sentiment. An hour later she had gone off to Tyson’s guess room to unpack her things as she said she would be staying for the week for the Avs’ family skate event.

“So what do you think? She really was so excited to meet you,” Tyson questioned you as you both relaxed on the couch.

“She’s as great as you’ve said Tys. I just hope I made a good impression,” you admitted nervously.

“Of course you did babe!” he kissed your temple.

“You lied to me though,” you said, half joking and half serious. He gave you a questioning look. “You told me you didn’t think your family was coming this year. If I had known your sister was here, I would have looked more put together then coming straight from work.”

“I think you look beautiful all the time,” Tyson said honestly, and you rolled your eyes at him.

“Not the point Tys.”

“Oh, don’t roll your eyes at me. Now, before you get upset, I didn't lie to you. I just...failed to mention it. Plus, when you asked me last week, no one was coming,” he stated simply and you huffed out a laugh.

“Okay, I guess I’ll let you slide this time,” you teased him and placed a quick kiss on his lips. As you pulled back, Tyson had an adorable grin on his face. “Any more surprises this week that you would like to inform me of?” Tyson shook his head at first, then stopped with his eyes widening a bit. He gave you a sheepish grin. “What is it?” you asked, once again nervous for whatever bomb he was about to drop on you.

“Nothing,” he rubbed the back of his neck.

“Tyson!” you looked at him expectantly. Your boyfriend looked like he was having an internal debate on whether to tell you or not. Eventually, he decided to tell you so you wouldn’t be thrown off guard like you were today.

“You know what? Never-mind, you’ll know I’m lying to you anyway. My mom is also coming. She was able to get work off and is flying in on Thursday evening,” he said, giving you his cheesiest grin so you wouldn’t be mad at him for keeping this from you. You gawked at him. One of the most important people in his life is coming to town, who you had never meet before, and he’s just telling you.

“Tyson! Why didn’t you tell me sooner! I have work Thursday, but I could have asked to have it off. Unless you don’t want me to meet her then…” you kept rambling and Tyson silenced you with a kiss.

“Of course I want you to meet her, just like I wanted you to meet Kacey. I just knew you would over think it and I didn’t want to panic you. We’re all going to go out to dinner after the game on Friday, you included. She’s so excited to meet you. She’s going to love you, just like I do,” he whispered the last part, taking your hands in his. It was the first time he had said that.

“You love me?” you asked, all thoughts of meeting his family pushed from your mind.

“Of course I do,” he said simply with an adoring smile. You smiled back at him.

“I love you too,” you whispered, leaning in for a sweet kiss. You couldn’t wait to meet the woman who raised this perfect, dorky man in front of you.

[hockeylvr59]

Honest Love || Cale Makar

Requested: [ ] yes [x] no

Authors Note: And we’re off...What better way to celebrate this man’s birthday than with the first chapter of the sequel??? We’re backtracking a little bit to cover the gap I purposely created so this picks up right after part 24 of Secret Love. We’re going to see a little more of Cale’s POV here in the sequel (***** will be your signal of a switch in viewpoints) and I hope you enjoy that additional insight into this relationship that I am head over heels in love with. Quick shoutout to @nazdaddy​ for the necklace jewelry concept...it didn’t get used before but I didn’t forget about it. I think that’s all I’ve got...let me know what you think. 

Gif Credit: @samgirard​

Warnings: cursing

Word Count: 3,385

~~~~~~~~~~~

It was shortly after noon when you pulled into the parking lot of the Avs practice facility. You were tired but beyond relieved to have finally reached Denver after a combined sixteen hours in the car over the past two days. Climbing out of the car you stretched, grateful that you had less than half an hour driving left in you after your little detour.

Walking down the hallways of the practice rink, you smiled at the sound of skates on ice as they slowly grew louder. Having been given directions, it wasn’t long before you found yourself standing at the end of the hallway right beside the benches. For a few minutes, you watched the players perform an offensive drill, quickly spotting your boyfriend moving across the ice. 

Thankfully, it wasn’t long before he spotted you as well and after finishing the drill, he skated over, reaching into the bench area. Finding what he was looking for, he continued along, greeting you with a quick kiss as he dropped the item into your open hand. 

“Talk later.” He promised, stealing one more quick kiss before skating away to the sound of his teammates’ chirps. 

“Hey, Makar...if you wanted a kiss all you had to do was ask.” EJ ribbed, shoving Cale gently. 

“Yeah...pay attention.” Nate teased. “I know we’re not as pretty as your girl but…”

“Don’t tell me you dragged her down here just to help you settle in,” Gabe stated, leaning on his stick as he shook his head at the former rookie. 

“Fuck off.” Cale groaned peeking over at you. “I had to get her an apartment key okay. You know...so she can actually move in.” Even from across the rink you could see that his cheeks were flushed and his dimples were on full display as he spoke. His words caused whoops to spill from his teammates’ lips and after watching Cale jostle with them for a few minutes, you shook your head before finally heading back out to the car. 

By the time you pulled into the underground lot of Cale’s…your building, you were ready to go upstairs and just crawl into bed for a nap. Gathering up your purse, overnight bag, and one of the smaller boxes, you locked the car and headed upstairs, letting yourself inside the apartment you now shared with your boyfriend. 

As you turned to head into the main living area, your eyes immediately landed on the ‘welcome home’ banner hanging above the island. Beneath it, a beautiful bouquet of roses was placed next to a bottle of your favorite wine and a small box. Setting your things down, you pulled the small card out of the bouquet, your eyes taking in Cale’s scratchy writing. 

Welcome home beautiful. 

I love you and am so grateful you agreed to move in with me. 

Cale

Again...Cale was just too much and you hadn’t even opened the small box yet. Gingerly picking it up, you cracked the lid open and your eyes went wide. Inside was a teardrop-shaped pendant with a practically flawless opal surrounded by tiny diamonds. This was way way too much but you knew Cale would refuse to take it back. He’d insist that you were doing so much for him that you deserved to be spoiled a little. And it didn’t pass your notice that he’d picked an opal...his birthstone. 

Popping the bottle of wine in the fridge, you gathered up the necklace along with your overnight bag and the box and made your way through to the bedroom. There you found post-its attached to all of the drawers Cale had emptied for you, including one of the two bedside tables. Even though he’d only been in town for a day and a half longer, he’d already gone to great lengths to ensure that you were able to transition into the space as easily as possible. 

Unpacking the few items you’d already brought up, you settled onto the couch for a few minutes just needing to take a breath. This was big...and it would take some time before this place felt like your own. Dozing off, you jolted awake at the sound of the apartment door hitting the doorstop. 

“Hey sweetheart, I dragged Josty with me to come help unload boxes and Calvy tagged along...where are your car keys?” When Cale finally appeared in front of you he clearly noticed your groggy state and immediately the volume of his voice dropped. “Sorry...I woke you didn’t I?” 

“Guess I dozed off.” You admitted, blinking a few times and yawning as you pushed yourself to your feet. “Keys are on the island.” You declared, pointing in their general direction. 

“Hi.” Cale grinned, kissing you again before pulling away to snatch the keys. “Don’t worry about lifting a finger, we’ve got the rest.” He insisted. 

A few minutes later, the three men were dropping boxes off in the living room while you stood looking out the window, taking in your new surroundings. 

“Thanks, guys,” You declared, looking back over your shoulder. 

“No worries.” Tyson insisted. “I live in the building anyway so it’s not really out of my way at all.” 

“And I wanted to meet the woman Cale can’t shut up about.” Matt declared, offering his hand out to shake. “Courtney and I would love to have you and Cale over for dinner sometime next week, I know she’s looking forward to meeting you as well.” 

“That would be great.” You agreed. You knew how close Cale had become with the Calvert’s during those first two playoff series and as much as they were looking forward to meeting you, you were looking forward to meeting them. 

“Well, we’ll let you get settled in, Cale explained that you’ve spent most of the last two days in the car, so I’m sure you just want to get unpacked and spend some time with him. We’ll see you at the team cookout tomorrow.” Matt declared and your eyes went wide at the end of his statement. As you looked over at Cale, Matt tugged Tyson out of the apartment, an unintelligible mumble falling from the younger man’s mouth as they went. 

“Yeah...uh...didn’t get the chance to mention that yet.” Cale declared rubbing his hand along the back of his neck. “Mel and Gabe are having everyone over tomorrow. Mandatory start of the season thing.” 

“We’re diving straight into things aren’t we?” You whispered to yourself, taking a deep breath. 

“I’m sorry.” Cale murmured. “You don’t have to go if you aren’t feeling up to it, I know everyone would understand.” 

“Cale it’s fine.” You insisted. “Just caught me a little off guard. It’ll be nice to meet everyone right away.” Cale eyed you skeptically before moving closer, his hands settling onto your hips. 

“If you're sure.” He breathed. “Now can we say a proper hello? I missed you, hopefully the drive wasn’t too bad.” 

“It was okay.” You shrugged. “Long.” Trailing your hands up to the back of his neck, you pulled him into a kiss that lingered, your body relaxing immediately under his touch. “How about we let these boxes sit for now and you come take a nap with me?” You suggested, a soft shriek spilling forth as Cale scooped you up and carried you into the bedroom, kicking the door shut behind him. 

“A nap it is.” He agreed, laying you down before toeing off his shoes and sliding under the covers beside you. The moment his warm hand slid along your bare hip, you felt your eyes fall shut, sleep taking over quickly. The bed may be different, but sleeping beside Cale...that was home. 

________

Having spent most of the previous night in bed with Cale, you didn’t have the opportunity to touch the boxes until the following morning. Unpacking led to stressing over what to wear to this cookout and before you knew it Cale was tossing a t-shirt and shorts at you insisting that anything you wore would be perfect. 

The driveway at the Landeskog residence was empty when Cale pulled in 45 minutes later and you looked over at him.

“How early are we?” You questioned, knowing smirk on your lips. 

“Fifteen...maybe twenty minutes.” Cale replied, sheepishly. Flicking his shoulder, you climbed out of the car. 

“My punctual boyfriend.” You declared, following after Cale as he headed up the front path, knocking on the door. It only took a minute for Gabe to answer and when he did he immediately seemed relieved by your early arrival. 

“Great timing...I need help with…” You had barely stepped foot in the house before Gabe was pulling Cale away, his voice falling off. Assuming, probably correctly, that you weren’t getting your boyfriend back any time soon, you continued through the house finding Mel in the kitchen. 

“So Cale doesn’t know how to not be early, and Gabe already stole him so is there anything I can help with?” You questioned, your hands tucked into your pockets as you waited to draw Mel’s attention. 

“Oh my god!” Mel declared, immediately stopping what she was doing. “First...I am so happy you’re here. When Gabe said Cale had asked you to move to Denver I was over the moon.” Rinsing and drying her hands, Mel immediately came to wrap you in a quick hug. “Second...would you mind watching Linnea...she’s starting to get a little restless I think.” 

You’d somehow completely missed the playpen in the corner with Linnea in it, the infant attempting to pull herself to her feet as she whined for attention. 

“Of course.” You agreed. “Not a problem at all.” Seeing Zoey laying on the floor with a ball beside her, you moved closer to the playpen. “Hey Linnea...why don’t we go outside and throw a ball for Zoey.” Your tone softened as you talked to the baby girl, but not to the extent that it would be considered ‘baby talk’. 

With Linnea smiling her mostly toothless grin up at you, you lifted her out of the playpen and onto your hip. 

“C’mon Zoey. Let’s go outside.” You declared, smiling back at Mel as she mouthed a grateful ‘thank you’. After sliding through the backdoor, you headed down the porch steps and into the grass, settling yourself down on the ground, Linnea between your thighs. As you helped Linnea throw the ball for Zoey, it was easy to lose yourself in the sound of Zoey’s playful prance and Linnea’s sweet giggle.

*****

Cale grunted softly as he adjusted the cooler in his arms to open the back gate of his captain’s yard. Of course Gabe didn’t do this the easy way...no he had to fill the coolers with ice and drinks before moving them into the backyard. There was definitely a lapse in common sense there. 

As the gate swung open, Cale froze in place, his eyes taking in the sight across the yard. He was jolted forward when Gabe bumped into him from behind but not even that could pull his eyes away. 

“Dude...what the hell?” Gabe mumbled. “Oh…” 

Cale could feel the heat flooding his cheeks as his heart started racing like he’d just skated a dozen laps. Just when he thought Y/N couldn’t possibly become more attractive to him she went and proved him wrong. Because there she was, dressed in the clothes he had picked with the necklace and bracelet he’d given her resting against her skin. Her hands were wrapped around his captain’s daughter’s hips as Linnea giggled loudly, bouncing up and down on her chubby little legs. The way she held the baby, the way she spoke softly to Linnea, the way Linnea reacted to her presence...it made Cale’s throat go dry and stole the breath from his lungs. 

It had been four months since they’d talked about kids, four months since he’d really thought about having kids. Cale knew that it was absolutely something he wanted someday and that she was the only person he wanted to have kids with. But now...now ‘someday’ seemed too far away. Now...for the first time he didn’t have to imagine what Y/N would be like as a mom and a part of him was screaming loudly that that was what he wanted...no needed. Now he knew without question that as soon as he put a ring on her finger he was going to also try and put a baby in her belly. His baby. Their baby. 

“If you’re going to stand there staring at her...maybe at least move so you aren’t blocking the gate.” Gabe’s chuckle snapped Cale from his daze and his cheeks flushed further as he moved just a step forward, his eyes landing back on his girlfriend as she cradled Linnea against her shoulder, her hand rubbing up and down the baby’s back. 

“Should we tell Joe to prep the ELCs for those mini Makars you’re gonna have her popping out soon?” Gabe teased, knowing look on his face. Suddenly, the weight of the cooler and the way his muscles were straining registered again and Cale moved to set it down near the porch steps. When he didn’t react to Gabe’s statement, the captain’s face turned serious. “Wait seriously...you’re actually thinking about it.” Gabe murmured softly. 

“Thinking about what?” EJ’s booming voice asked as he and Nate came in through the back gate. 

“Calesy here is thinking about knocking his girlfriend up.” Gabe replied, looking over his shoulder to where Y/N had disappeared with Linnea just a moment before. Sounds of disbelief fell from his teammates’ mouths and Cale rubbed at the back of his neck shrugging. 

“It’s not like we haven’t talked about it before.” He admitted. 

“You’re what...four months in and you’ve talked about kids?” Nate prompted. 

“We talked about them the day we got together. It’s not like we were strangers guys.” Cale defended, shoving his hands in his pockets. “So yeah I’m thinking about it. She’s spent most of her life waiting for me...I don’t want to make her wait too long. Maybe we’ll start trying come end of the season.” 

“Well look at you growing up.” Gabe declared. “She’s the one isn’t she? You’re way more confident than when we last saw you.” 

“She’s absolutely the one.” Cale agreed. “Now what else did you need help with?” No one fought him as Cale changed the subject and headed back toward the garage, making a mental note to get better at masking his expressions when it came to his feelings for Y/N. 

*****

You’d laid Linnea down for a nap after she’d fallen asleep on you outside and then had been promptly pulled into a house tour by Mel since you hadn’t seen it before. By the time you made your way back outside with a glass of wine in hand, you found Cale sitting at the table on the patio, a beer in hand as he listened to the guys share stories of their summers. 

Sliding your palm down along his chest, you leaned down to press a kiss to his cheek. 

“Linnea wants you to know you have good taste in jewelry.” You whispered softly, smiling as his head tilted up to look at you, his eyebrows raised. “She liked the way the sun reflected off of my necklace. She fiddled with it until she zonked out.” Cale’s hum of approval and recognition was soft as he scooted back, seamlessly pulling you down onto his lap. 

There you stayed, Cale’s chin on your shoulder as more and more of Cale’s teammates and their families arrived. As soon as the Calverts arrived, Cale was immediately summoned by Kasey to play and you watched as your boyfriend chased after the four-year-old. This was the first time you had seen him with kids in quite awhile and it only reaffirmed how great of a dad he would be when he decided he was ready to take that step. 

Having finished your glass of wine, you moved to take it inside so that it didn’t get broken. As you reached the kitchen, you saw Mel and one of the other women fawning over something on a cell phone. 

“Oh, Y/N, perfect timing.” Mel declared. “There’s something I think you should see.” 

You took the phone from her, pressing play on a video. Mel must have snuck outside earlier without you noticing because you watched as Zoey trotted over with a ball before racing off again as Linnea tossed it for her. Hearing yourself praise Linnea for her strong throw was slightly odd but as the camera followed Zoey as she chased the ball your eyes fell to the background. Cale was standing there with a cooler in his hands and even with the focus slightly blurred you could see that his cheeks were flushed and the expression on his face was one that was unfamiliar to you. 

Handing the phone back, your mind raced, trying to figure out what Cale had been thinking. There were bits and pieces of emotions you recognized: love, awe, joy; but all together it added up to something unreadable. 

“Should we uh...be expecting any more big changes in Cale’s off-ice life soon?” The other woman questioned, an almost knowing look on her face. Your brain finally placed her as Matt’s wife Courtney but it wasn’t quite fast enough to pick up on what she could possibly be referring to. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about?” You deflected. 

“You mean it doesn’t look like he wants to get you pregnant as soon as possible?” Mel chimed in. “Because that’s all I see. Cale saw you with my baby and he gets that look on his face...he wants to make you a mom, no doubt in my mind.” Swallowing hard, you moved to finally set your glass in the sink. 

“He’s not ready for kids yet. We’ve talked about it.” You explained. “We’re just focused on us right now. We’ve only been together for a few months.” Thankfully, one of the guys walked into the kitchen allowing you to slip back outside. You’d planned on grabbing a water but after that conversation you definitely needed something a little bit stronger. Flopping down on the steps with a wine cooler in hand, you watched as Cale played spike ball with Tyson, Nate, and Burky. Immediately your conversation back in May came to mind and you thought about how Cale had said he didn’t think he’d be so scared about having a baby if the situation was right. That didn’t mean he wanted kids in the short-term or that he was even ready to start thinking about it. But then again...you hadn’t been able to place the look on his face which was abnormal so maybe there was a grain of truth to Mel and Courtney’s presumptions. 

“You look puzzled...everything okay?” Cale’s smooth voice pulled you out of the rabbit hole you’d found yourself in and you looked up at him amazed at how one look settled all of the uneasiness inside you. Cale would let you know whether he wanted kids when he was ready, there was no need to dwell or worry about it now. Kissing him gently, you nodded, letting him pull you up onto your feet. 

“Everything is good.” You assured him. “Just needed a minute.” With Cale’s hand rubbing against your lower back you let him convince you to go get your asses kicked by Sam Girard and his girlfriend at cornhole. It was fun, especially when you made Sam throw backward because he was just too good otherwise. 

By the time you finished your best of three series, the food was ready and you made up a plate, settling in beside Cale on the steps as you ate. After dinner the two of you bowed out because your eyes had started to droop from fatigue. Though the guys chirped him, Cale kept his focus on you until you had slipped into the passenger seat of the car. 

Adjusting to life in Denver was going to take some time for sure. But you were confident it would be worth it because Cale was definitely worth it. 

Welcome Home Gifts:

Cookout Outfit:

[woahitslucyylu]

Raw. (Part II)

GIF credit to @untmd. 

Author’s Notes: Here is part II to Fire Dick + Fuck Boys. This when EJ was made. (: Enjoy, sleazies! Also, thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who loves this series and supports me. You have made a wife and mom feel seen as herself and damn, y’all make a girl feel so loved. Stay sparkly, frands! 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Erik slumped on the couch - scrolling through his phone as he waited for you. He actually had missed you or missed your pussy - he couldn’t be sure. After making his rounds at frat parties, he found himself drunk and horny and you were the first one his dick thought of as he stumbled in the door of his off-campus apartment. 

The soft knocks at the door brought him to his feet. His gray sweats hung low on his hips as he padded to the door - opening to reveal your smirking face and curved frame. 

“Hey.” You mumbled, walking into the apartment - brushing against his naked chest as you walked into the entryway. His thick hands slid over your waist - pinching your love handles as he pulled you close, kicking the door shut with ease. 

“Take all this shit off.” His voice hot in your ears as his hands slid over your ass - smacking your plump ass as his lips nipped and sucked at your exposed neck. Your fingers pulled at his dreads, suctioning his lips right beneath your ear as you shed your jacket and purse. Your veins pulsed with liquid courage as you pulled away - your neck tingling from Erik’s assault. You held his gaze - his half-hooded eyes burning into you as you stripped your shirt and shorts, stepping back with each discarded piece of clothing - inching further to Erik’s bedroom as he matched each step. 

Your knees hit the edge of the bed and your body sank on reflex - the down duvet fluffing around you as you propped on your elbows to watch Erik strip. His body was a work of art - each muscle carefully crafted by dedication. Your eyes twinkled with lust as you swept your eyes over him. 

“Did you miss me?” He mused as the bed dipped from his weight. 

“No.” You kissed your teeth with your admission, rolling your neck, as he hovered over you. 

“I missed this though.” Your hand wrapped around his hardened length and slid up and down - jerking him as his muscular arms framed your body. 

Eric exhaled harshly as you continued to pump his now throbbing dick - his head slippery with precum. Having him literally in the palm of your hand left you feeling drunk with desire. His fingers teased your lips and you opened your mouth without hesitation - sucking on his thick fingers as your hand stayed wrapped around him. 

“What a good girl.” The compliment broke your resolve as you fell against the bed and pushed your hips into his - physically begging for his attention. His wet fingers slid into you - the fullness arching your back as you rocked against him.

A chorus of moans brought a sly smile to Erik’s face as you begged him for more - palming your breasts in search of more pleasure, “Daddy, please. Just one more.” You whined as his thumb pressed hard against your clit. His hand fell hard against your thigh, “Shut up, bitch. You don’t give orders.” He bent down - gripping your cheeks as his fingers scissored inside of you and dropped a trail of saliva into your mouth - watching you eagerly swallow his gift. His hand slid down, gripping your throat, as he added another finger to your gushing pussy and watched pleasure wash over your face. Your eyes fluttered as you fell apart on his hand - creaming as your legs trembled. 

Whimpers and the sounds of your orgasm filled the air as you begged him for respite. “It’s too much.” You mumbled - your knees closing tightly around his chiseled bicep. His laugh was almost sinister as he mocked your dreamy state, “Oh, it’s too much for the princess.” His dreads brushed your cheek as his teeth scraped your skin - electrifying your body once more. His fingers curled into you, calling your orgasm, as you squirted - your pleasure gushing against your thighs. “See, just listen to Daddy. I’ll take care of you.” His words rang in your ears as stars danced across your closed eyes. 

“Fuck me, please.” You begged, rising your hips as your fingers threaded through his dreads and sharply tugged at his loose dreads. The slickened head of his dick slid against your swollen clit - your sensitivity pushing you into brazen want. “Daddy, please. You feel me up so good. I’ve been good.” Your acrylic nails raked across his back as Erik pulled back - his hand stroking himself. 

“You gonna let me feel that pussy?” His fingers rubbed circles on the inside of your thigh as he watched you wiggle under his gaze. “Please. Daddy will come in your mouth.” His request fell on wanton ears as he slid in - his tip resting ever so snug in your heated core. 

“Oh god,” Your eyes rolled back as you pushed your hips down - your pussy swallowing him whole. “Fuckkk,” Erik’s groan melted you as you ground against him. He stilled inside you - feeling your velvet walls flutter around him. Your pussy gripped him perfectly and he remembered, in that instance, why he missed you to begin with.

He grunted as you squeezed him tight - feeling every ridge of his throbbing dick. You pulled his hand, dragging it to rest heavy on your throat as you pushed against him. Erik smirked at your desire, “Daddy’ll give you this dick. Whose pussy is this?” He pushed deep - your mouth falling to an ‘O’ as he thrusted roughly into you. “Huh? Say it.” He smacked your thigh - the crack against your skin echoing through the room. “Yours, Daddy. Oh shit,” You met him, your hips rising off the bed as you pushed back,”Daddy, I’m cumming.” A litany of curses fell from your lips as you creamed against him. Erik lost himself in the sight of your intimate connection - his eyes fluttering as he jerked your body against his. 

“Please give it to me.” Your plea crushed his resolve as he shot hop ropes of cum into you - your body greedily squeezing him, holding him tight, as you closed your eyes to a spinning room. 

Your chests rose and fell in unison - a testament to the intimate moment. You felt tears prick your eyes as Erik achingly pulled out. The loss hitching your breath as he rolled beside you - the sizzling air simmering as you both reveled in your high. Your eyes fluttered as Erik’s soft snores filled the quiet space and you rolled into his sleeping body - your thighs still sticky as sleep rolled over you.  

[tiasgarden]

If I know what love is, it’s because of you. Chapter 1.

Dedicated to @sadgirlshitforever <3 ilysm

Gina Porter had recently joined EJ Caswell as a news anchor on Good morning America. It was originally only suppose to be for a few months. One of the anchors had to take a few months off due to injury.

She from the start had a bad feeling about EJ Caswell. He was very full of himself and always talked down to her. The first day he was convinced he was his new run errands for me girl. She couldn’t believe she got moved from her old news station to this. Yes the pay was better but could she put up with EJ?  She honestly didn’t know.

“ Hey um Georgia right?, listen so you know Peggy is out for only a few months so there is no point in getting to know you. But  just know you stay in your lane and we should have no issues” He said in a ice cold tone. He was glaring at her which didn’t intimidate her in the least.

“ Okay well first I am GINA. G-I-N-A. Also I don’t take orders from someone I just met, “ She said back as she walked over to her seat. It was 5 minutes before their first show together.  She needed to breathe and to relax, she got this.

“ Okay we are live in 5, 4, 3, 2 , 1!” The camera man said. His name was Larry and Gina liked him a lot, she hoped they could be friends.

“ Hello and Good Morning America!!, I’m EJ Caswell and boy do we have a bunch of news to catch you up on! But first I have a new co anchor filling in for Peggy,  her name is Georgia Porter” He said with a smile on his face.

“Um it’s actually Gina, hello America!  my name is Gina Porter not Georgia.  To start us off, let's have a check in with Greg for the weather!” She said as she passed it over to Greg.

“  Sweetie, you aren’t suppose to talk, you just sit there and look well decent” He said to her before looking away and rolling his eyes.

“ I am doing my job, and don’t call me that, it’s gross.  Look we don’t have to be friends, we can stay strangers. I’d much prefer that anyway.” She said.

“ But we have to do our jobs. So lets pretend we are friends.  “ He said hoping she would comply.

This time she rolled her eyes at him.  In no universe would she be his friend, acting or not. He gave her a bad vibe, like bad fish she had one time in Phoenix . 

“ No. We just do our jobs.  I’m not pretending we are friends. I’d rather do anything else.We don’t like each others presence lets just leave it at that” She said before The camera was back on them.

“ Welcome back, so our first story involves a massive protest  for changes in our country against climate change.  Many Americans in multiple cities across the country, marched yesterday saying the government isn’t doing enough. The temperatures are becoming more intense each year”  

“ Okay but really, no one cares about that, now onto a more important story,  we are in the middle of a meat shortage!   A meat plant has shut down due to contamination and  it provided most meat in this country.  Prices are anticipated to go up as  it will be harder to find meat in the coming months. “ Ej finishes before  they go into another break.

It was now time for them to go home. They did the first half of the show and the other two anchors did the second.  It felt like it had been hours when it had been but not too long.

It was now 11:30am, and she had gotten up at 5am this morning so she was a tad tired.  She didn’t get why this dude didn’t like her as much as he did.  They just met, they hadn’t had much interaction at all.  He was only 2 years older than her, him 26 and her 24.

As she pushed that thought from her mind, she collected her things and walked towards the exit of the building.

Her apartment was only a half an hour from here. She had decided to live in New Jersey instead of NYC, as the price wasn’t as expensive.  She got a nice  two bedroom apartment and her apartment allowed animals so she had her calico cat named Toulouse.  He was her best friend, he could always cheer her up.

She had a nice basic Honda CRV but it was a beautiful Blue and it was new, her ex had bought it for her and even after they had broke up, she kept it. She changed the name on the car to her and as sad as it sounded, it was the thing he ever bought her..  

Oh Brandon… Just as she was about to open the door to her car, she heard a voice in the background.

“ Hey wait up, look I’m sorry about the way EJ treated you this morning, he probably didn’t  get enough sleep like usual” A girl  approached her as she reached her car.

“ My name is Sydney and I am the girl who is errand girl. I get all the coffee, lunches etc.  it is an okay job I mean the  pay is good, but wait i’m rambling i’m sorry” Sydney said as she smiled at Gina.

“No it’s fine, this is the best conversation I’ve had today. Mot have just been hello nice to meet you and that was the end. All these fake people pretending to like me. It’s nice to meet you Sydney, I’m Gina”

As the two shook hands, Gina gained a little more hope that this job wouldn’t suck as much.  Maybe EJ would get fired and it could be her show and her’s alone.

A girl could dream.

[puckinghell]

Almost | Nathan MacKinnon

Summary: Every time Nate doesn’t tell you he loves you, he almost does. Until the clock suddenly starts ticking, and almost might not be enough. Words: 5.3k Note: I wrote this all at once and I couldn’t be bothered to read it after to make sure it made sense so excuse me if it doesn’t. We’re in the midst of a global crisis, I couldn’t buy potatoes in the supermarket cause it’s empty, and I don’t have my emotional support dumbass hockey boys, so you can imagine the emotional distress I’m under.

---

Nate isn’t very good at flirting.

He knows that, and he’s known that for a long time. Not only because he’s got pretty good self-insight, but also because his teammates have been telling him for years. 

In fact, the first time he went out with Tyson, back when he just came onto the Avs and going out was a big deal to him, Tys shook his head and said: “If you don’t learn how to flirt you’re gonna end up dying alone. With a Cup and enough gold to drown in, but alone.” 

Nate loves Tys to death, but he still thinks about that night sometimes and wants to kick Tys in the shin.

Because as much as he’s bad at flirting, he never really thought it was a problem. Surely one day a girl would come into his life and she’d like him so much she would do the heavy lifting, and he could just kinda cruise along. Or maybe one day, when the right girl would come into his life, it would all be easy, suddenly. 

Except.

He’s pretty sure that you are the right girl. He has been sure about that for the past two years, ever since you became friends. And yet, you’re still friends. Just friends.

Nate thinks he kinda accidentally put himself in the friend zone. At first he thought it was fine if you were just friends, because it would grow into something more naturally. 

But one day Gabe turned to him solemnly and said: “Once she’s put you in the ‘Don’t go there’ part of her brain, you’re not coming out of there, bro.” 

He’d waved Gabe off, but now he’s starting to think Gabe was right. 

Because in the beginning, sometimes, you’d look at him a certain way, or you’d say something, and Nate was certain you meant it in a flirty way. Was sure he saw his own feelings reflected in your eyes. But those times became less and less frequent and now, he can’t remember the last time you looked at him like that. He only knows that you talk to him about dates you go on, like it doesn’t break his heart to think about you with someone else. And you wrap your arms around him so easy and comfortably, like the butterflies in his stomach when you touch him have no right o be there. And you ask to sleep in his bed with him after late movie nights like the thought of it ever being anything more than sleeping has never entered your mind. Nate thinks maybe he’s missed his window, but he also can’t imagine not ending up with you. So he starts his quest of getting you to notice him in a different way.

--

It’s shortly after he made that decision that he’s finding himself in Gabe’s backyard, a bottle of beer in his hand as he stands next to EJ who is grilling steaks on the barbecue. Gabe’s summer barbecue is somewhat of a staple, for the Avs, and if he thought that having a baby would mean Gabe’s parties would come to an end, Nate was wrong. Gabe flutters through the backyard with Linnea on his arm like he’s never done anything else. He switches his own beer bottle with Linnea’s bottle of milk – or whatever she’s drinking – between people he chats to, and before too long he shows up next to Nate and EJ. “Looking good,” Gabe whistles, looking at the grill. “Nate, are you staring at Y/N again?” Nate swirls around to face his captain; he hadn’t even noticed he was staring at you, but perhaps he was, because he knows you’ve been talking to Josty for the past 15 minutes and he’s not entirely happy about the way Josty leaned into you while he laughed at something you said. “It’s too late, bud,” EJ says, his signature toothless grin appearing. “You’ve waited too long and now she’s going to think you mean everything in a friendly way.” “That’s not true!” Nate starts protesting, even though he knows EJ is just trying to rile him up; but he can’t really make his point because you choose that moment to come over to them. “Are you still not done?” you tease EJ, playfully bumping against his shoulder. “I’m hungry, EJ, can you not grill a little faster?” “Grilling is like art,” EJ grumbles, “you can’t rush it.” “That’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever said,” you answer, your voice filled with fondness. “Ah, there’s Linnea! Can I hold her?” You make grabby hands at the baby and Gabe easily passes her to you, which, honestly, rude. “You never let me hold her!” Nate sputters, and Gabe shrugs. “That’s because Y/N is responsible and you killed the only succulent you had in your house.” “A succulent is not the same as a baby. I could take care of her.” Nate feels extremely offended, even more so when you giggle. “No offense, but if I had to pick someone to take care of Linnea, it would be Y/N, then Colin, then literally anyone else, before it would be you,” says Gabe. “Even Josty?” Nate whines, and at that moment, Mel steps in next to Gabe, putting her hand on his back. “Are we letting Tyson take care of Linnea?” she asks. “Absolutely no way,” Gabe is quick to answer, and you suppose it’s a good thing Josty isn’t here to hear that. “I was just saying I would let Y/N take care of our little girl.” “Oh, would you?” Mel excitedly grasps your shoulder. “Gabe and I haven’t had a date night in like, months! “Sure, I’d love to,” you answer truthfully. You slide your finger into Linnea’s hand, the baby making excited gurgling noises as she clasps down on it. She’s stronger than she looks. “Can I come?” Nate says suddenly. His cheeks are a little tinted, even though it’s not that warm outside anymore. “It could be like, a babysitting date.” “Oh, of course!” you answer. “That’s a perfect idea, Nate! Mel, we should set up a play date for Linnea with my sister’s baby!” You ignore EJ’s cackling laugh and what sounds like a low groan coming from Nate, instead follow Mel to the porch with Linnea in your hands to plan the play date. EJ slings his arm around Nate, grinning a little wickedly as he says: “So close, Nathan. Almost got her.”

Nate elbows him in the stomach loud enough to earn a disapproving tut from Gabe.

--

Nate tells Sid about his plan during their monthly FaceTime session. “Good luck with that, dude,” Sid says, and it doesn’t even sound that condescending, coming from him. “What do you think I should do?” Nate knows asking Sid for advice on flirting is like asking a blind man for advice on how to see, but he’s getting desperate and he really, really doesn’t want to have to ask Tys. He’d never live that one down. “Uh,” Sid answers, and that’s about as much as Nate was expecting from him, anyway. “Maybe ask her out to dinner, or something?” Actually, that’s more than Nate was expecting from Sid, because that’s actually not the worst idea. Sure, you’ve gone out to dinner together many times, but it was always very clearly not a date setting; either the other guys were there, or it was at a MacDonalds – Nate doesn’t like to go to junkfood places, but he supposes if Tys was gonna leave any imprint on him, it would be his love for McFlurry’s – or it was just dinner at his apartment, wearing sweatpants and ordering Chinese while watching some dumb Netflix show. His chance to ask you comes quicker than he thought, because he’s still talking to Sid – about hockey, this time, something Sid does actually have great advice on – when you come barreling into his apartment. Your hair is wet from the rain and you shrug off your rain coat with a wave in his direction. “It’s pouring,” you tell him, “and I walked to work, so.” To anyone else, it would be a bad explanation, but it’s not the first time you’ve showed up at Nate’s apartment like this. You like to walk to work when it’s not too cold but sometimes the weather surprises you and you don’t want to walk back in the rain or the wind. Nate’s apartment is a lot closer to your work than your apartment, so it’s become a habit of yours to go to Nate’s on days like that and just hang out in his apartment until you either fall asleep there or Nate offers to drive you home.    “Is that Y/N?” Sid asks. “Hey, Y/N!” “Hi Sid!” you call back. “Nate, I’m gonna shower.” “Ask her,” Sid says, which is very pushy for Sid, who usually never tells Nate to do anything, instead just says “If I were you, I would consider” and let Nate figure out the underlying message. “Ask me what?” you ask Nate curiously, eyeing him up and down. He’s glaring at Sid as if Sid said something wrong, and when he looks at you, he doesn’t quite catch your eye. “I was wondering if you wanted to get dinner with me?” Nate asks. It’s a bit of a formal question for something you do at least once a week, but you shrug it off; Nate is a bit weird, sometimes, and you’re used to that. “Sure,” you say. “Let’s order Thai. Get my usual while I’m showering? I’m hungry.” Then you yell: “Bye Sid!” before making your way to the bathroom. Nate lets out a frustrated sigh and Sid sounds sympathetic when he says: “Almost there, dude. Just, next time, if I were you, I’d consider…” Nate is already not listening anymore.

--

Today is the day, Nate has decided. He bought roses, which EJ told him is lame and Gabe told him is great idea, and he cooked pasta, for which he used Sammy’s recipe. He’s not a good cook, but Sammy promised it’s impossible to mess up, and he thinks he did alright. He texted you this morning to ask you to come to his place for dinner. You replied with a sure :) and Nate takes that to be a good sign. He has a plan. When you walk in, he’ll take your coat, instantly changing the routine between you, because he normally stays on the couch when you open the door with your key. He won’t be wearing sweatpants, either, not even if he expects you might be; he’s wearing black jeans and a nice button up, and he’s even done his hair. Well, made an attempt to; it didn’t really work out and now it looks kinda the same as always, but hey, he’s really trying, here. Next, he’ll lead you to the table, which he’ll actually have set up, and at that point, surely you understand something different is happening, because a set up table is so different from his normal paper plates and Netflix. Then he’ll give you the roses and confess his feelings. He’s not really thought that part through too much, because every time he thinks about it he almost throws up. So. He’ll have to wing that. The problem, Nate finds out, with planning everything to perfection, is that when one thing goes wrong, the entire plan has to go out the window. Because half an hour after you were supposed to arrive, he gets a text saying sorry I’m late! Be there in 10 and he knows he’s gonna have to reheat the pasta, which Sammy said was not the point of pasta. But he’s not gonna kick off and cause a scene when you arrive, because he reasons it doesn’t really matter, in the grand scale of things. So he sits on the couch and waits. Finally, the door swings open and Nate jumps to his feet, ready to take your coat from you. Except, you’re not wearing a coat; you’re wearing his old hoodie and for some reason his breath hitches in his throat and suddenly he feels like his feet are nailed to the floor, unable to move. “Hey, sorry I’m late,” you call, basically running further into the apartment. “I came from the gym and let me tell you, I have got great news!” “News?” Nate echoes. You stop right in front of him, your eyes shining and a bright smile on your face. Suddenly, you lift an eyebrow, eyes catching on something. “Nathan MacKinnon, did you do something to your hair?” Before Nate can answer, you shrug and continue. “Well, it doesn’t matter anyway. Guess what happened at the gym!” “What?” Nate seems to only be able to repeat what you say, so he decides to stick with that. “I got asked on a date!” Nate thinks if he had one wish, he would wish for the floor to open up beneath his feet and for him to sink through the building, all 7 floors below his apartment, and then down into the ground, until he could bury himself in the dirt. “A date?” You’re so hyped you don’t even notice your best friend is simply repeating your words, barely reacting in any other way. “He’s so hot, this guy, Nate! He comes to the gym every Thursday, just like I do, and we never talk but sometimes I catch him looking, and like, I look back, you know? And today he came over and he asked if I wanted to get a drink, but obviously I had plans with you and I would never blow you off, so I said we could do it tomorrow. I have a date tomorrow, Nate!” In your excitement, you reach forward and wrap your arms around Nate, pressing your face into his chest. His heart is beating fast, and you notice that he kinda just remains frozen into place, so you look up at him with a frown. “Nate? You okay?” That seems to shake Nate from his trance, as he literally shakes himself out of it and slowly puts his arms around you. With a happy sigh, you allow yourself to sink into the embrace. “What are we eating, anyway? I’m hungry.” Nate praises any and every God there could possibly be that he decided to leave the door to the dining room closed. “Whatever you want, we can order,” he answers. “I’m just gonna, uh, get changed.” “I thought you looked fancy,” you grin, letting go of him and dropping onto the couch. “What about Italian?” Hours later, Nate throws away the empty pizza boxes and puts the roses in the bin with them, and then he goes to his bedroom to scream into a pillow. He wants to call you, wants to ask you to not go on a date with that guy. But then he thinks about how excited you looked and he doesn’t call. He doesn’t call, but he almost does, and he thinks that’s a pretty good way to describe how his life is going.

--

Nate has truly hit rock bottom, which is why he’s scrolling through his phone until he finds the familiar name. “Dogggg!” Tys yells into the phone, because he can never answer the phone like a normal person. “I’m baking chocolate chip cookies!” And Nate is suddenly a little overwhelmed with how much he misses his best friend. “Baking?” he teases. “What kinda mental breakdown are you going through this time?” “Hey, fuck you,” Tys says, but he sounds mellow and not bothered at all. “What’s up?” And Nate has been planning to ease into this conversation, have a little small talk, maybe talk about Toronto and how the coaching change has been working out for Tys, but Tys is his best friend – apart from you – and suddenly he can’t keep it to himself anymore. “I’m in love with Y/N,” he blurts out, and he hears a clank on the other side of the line that sounds suspiciously like Tyson dropping a spoon. “Well, yeah,” Tys comes back, a little too calmly for Nate’s liking. “But I meant like, what’s up with you that’s new, Dogg.” “I need to do something about it,” Nate says, and that seems to get Tyson’s attention, cause he suddenly sounds a lot more interested when he says: “Oh?”    “Cause like,” Nate starts, and he knows he’s about to start rambling. “Cause I’m so into her, you know, and I have been for so long, but I don’t think she sees me that way? And maybe if I would’ve done something sooner, she would’ve thought of me as an option, and she wouldn’t be going out with that guy right now..” “Wow hold up,” Tyson interrupts. “Wait, she’s got a boyfriend?” “No!” The force with which that word erupts from Nate’s mouth is maybe a little too telling, cause Tyson immediately goes into ‘calm down Nate’ mode. “Hey, hey, it’s just a date or two, right?” he soothes. “It’s totally not serious yet. And you and her, you’ve got history, dude. She loves you! There’s still time!” “What if she doesn’t love me in that way, though?” Nate asks, and he hates how tiny his voice sounds. “Then she’s got no taste, Nate,” Tyson says, awfully genuine. “You’d be an awesome boyfriend. Hell, you’ve basically been her boyfriend, you two act like a couple all the time.” Nate hadn’t thought of it like that. “Cause like, you’re always hanging out together, right?” Tys continues. “And you bring her to all your events as your plus one. She cooks you dinner at least once a week. You pick her up and drop her off when it’s raining and she doesn’t wanna walk. You always get her a Christmas present. She even bakes your favorite cookies when you’ve had a tough game.” He sounds slightly jealous when he says: “Cookies, bro! That’s true love.” And, well, Nate had always thought that was just a friend thing, but when he thinks about it, he doesn’t really treat any of his other friends that way. Has never picked up his phone at 4 am because Sid was calling, never ran a bath for Tys after a long day. Maybe, in a way, he has been acting like your boyfriend. Except. “We don’t kiss and stuff, though.” Tyson laughs. “And stuff. I bet you want the stuff, huh, bro?” “Shut up,” Nate grumbles, but he’s too thankful for Tyson’s input to put much heat behind it. “Brutes, what do I do?” “You need to complete the package, Dogg,” Tys says, sounding confident. “You’re almost her boyfriend. Now go get that kiss and be it for real.”

--

Nate is not usually a big drinker, but this, he needs to be super, super drunk for. “Careful,” Burky says, as he watches Nate slam back another shot. “That’s a lot of alcohol, Nate.” “You gonna call Gabe on me?” Nate says, defiant, and Burky shrugs. “No, but if you need to be carried home, I’ll get Z to do it.” That’s enough for Nate to not order another shot right away. “He’s upset because Y/N is here with a guy.” It’s Comphy who speaks, in a dull tone like he’s talking about the weather. Josty, who is with them too, sits up a little straighter. “She came with a guy?” “Shut up,” Nate all but growls. “I didn’t know when I invited her the invitation would be extended.” He really hadn’t; he’d asked you to come out with the boys after the game because he found out you were bringing the guy – Nate purposely forgets his name every time – and he figured he was running out of time. At least if he kept you out all night you couldn’t go home with the guy, and he might find the courage to tell you how he feels. Except then you’d shown up with the guy in tow, and now he’s wondering if it’s possible to drown himself in tequila. He must’ve looked properly miserable for the guys to crowd around him like they are; Gabe went home because he’s a dad now, but Comph and Josty and Burky are all sitting with him, refusing to have fun now that their assistant captain looks ready to commit a crime, and Z and EJ both keep shooting worried glances his way. Nate really doesn’t care. What he cares about is that you’re with with a guy that’s not him, and you’ve barely paid attention to him. He’s just about drunk enough that that annoyance is starting to become unbearable, and just drunk enough that it seems like a good idea to do something about it. “Nate, no…” Burky starts, when Nate stands up, and Comphy reaches for him, but even drunk Nate is quicker than them and he starts pushing his way through the crowd, to where you’re standing with the guy and laughing at something he’s saying. You feel two strong arms wrap around your waist, the grip almost too tight as you’re pushed flat against a muscular chest. For a second, you freeze, ready to fight, but then you smell familiar cologne and you recognize the arms that are wrapped around you in iron grip. “Nate?” you say. “Everything okay?” Nate hums in your ear but it’s not really words; just a low hum that makes something tingle in the pit of your stomach. If only Tom knew the effect Nate has on you, he probably wouldn’t be here. As it is, Tom’s eyes are wide as he stares at Nate. You did tell him you knew people on the team and that’s why you could get tickets to the Avs game so last minute, but you’d forgone the mention that your “contact” is Nathan MacKinnon; for some reason, you didn’t really want those worlds to mix just yet. Maybe that’s why you’d been keeping your distance from Nate, tonight. Normally, Nate isn’t the kinda guy to come chasing you down, but you can smell the alcohol on his breathe and his words slur a little when he says: “Where have you been?” Your heart starts beating a little faster. “Here,” you say, trying to ignore the dark tone to Nate’s voice. To say you’re confused in an understatement: Nate sounds almost angry, but he’s clinging to you like he’s not ever letting you go, so surely he can’t be angry at you. You wish Tom wasn’t here. If you’d been alone, you would’ve dragged Nate outside and talked to your best friend, figured out what’s bothering him, because it’s clear there’s something and you don’t like knowing that he’s carrying it alone. Nate has a tendency to carry the entire world on his shoulders, on his own, even when there’s so many people who would share the burden with him. “Dude,” Tom says, “you’re Nathan MacKinnon!” You feel Nate tense behind you. You know he doesn’t like to be recognized in public spaces but honestly, Tom didn’t speak loudly, and he’s not making a scene, so you wiggle out of Nate’s hold and put your hand on his arm.

Usually, that calms him down. “Yeah, Tom, this is my friend Nate. Nate, this is Tom.” Nate’s face is schooled into perfect indifference as he shakes the hand Tom holds out to him; the only thing betraying that he’s annoyed is the fact that his other, free, hand is balled into a fist and his knuckles are white. “Good to meet you, man,” Tom says. “That was such a nice goal there in the 2nd, holy shit dude! I’m like, such a big fan of you!” You cringe a little as Nate narrows his eyes. “Thanks,” he says, and he could not sound more bored if he tried. Even Tom shifts on his feet and nervously looks towards the floor. Then Nate’s hand finds its way to your lower back, his thumb dipping under your shirt. You feel like all the blood is rushing through your cheeks, and when Tom frowns, you feel like you could pass out. “Nice to meet you,” Nate says, in a tone that makes it clear he’d rather undergo a colonoscopy than ever speak to Tom again. “But can I borrow my girl for a second?” My girl? “Nate, what the…” you sputter, but you’re already being pushed through the crowd towards the exit, and before you know it you’re standing in a dark alley with your back to the brick wall of the club. Nate is standing close, so close you can feel his breath against your cheek when he exhales. His eyes are big and a bit wild, and you wonder if he can hear your heartbeat as clearly as you can. “Nate…” You mean to ask him what’s going on, but for some reason his name comes out of your mouth in a quiet rush of air, and it seems to do something to Nate, who inhales sharply and drops his head a little, his forehead nearly touching yours. “I hate it,” he mutters, the words soft enough that you can only make them out because it’s just the two of you in the silent outside air. “Hate what?” “Seeing you with him.” Those words hit you like a freight train, and all you manage to bring out is a soft “uhm”. “I can’t watch you with him,” Nate whispers. His hands are against the wall but his chest is pressed up against yours, and slowly but surely, he’s leaning in. And that’s when you realize, oh. Nate is going to kiss you. To your own surprise, that doesn’t shock you. It’s not some big thing that throws the world of its axis, that shakes the ground beneath your feet. It’s just a realization and then a soft, warm feeling of comfort spreading through your body. You want him to kiss you so badly, but it’s not like something is exploding, knowing that he wants it too. Instead, it’s like something finally falls into place.

“Y/N?” a voice goes, and you almost whine out loud. Nate jumps back like he’s been stung. He stares at you with wide eyes, the color drained from his face, and then he turns around and all but runs away. Tom watches him leave, then faces you, and in that moment you know four things absolutely certain. Nate was jealous. You’re never going to go on another date with Tom. Nate almost kissed you. And almost wasn’t enough.

--

Nate wakes up with a banging headache, the taste of dirt in his mouth and 20 missed text messages. Most of the messages are from Tyson, and there’s one from EJ, who is apparently the one that told Tyson about last night in the first place, because his text simply reads: Had to tell Brutes. You need help. Which is probably fair enough. There’s a text from Josty offering support, one from Burky asking if he got home safe, one from Gabe that Nate doesn’t read because he doesn’t want to see Gabe’s disappointed face every time he closes his eyes for the next few days, and then there’s a text from you. We have to talk. Well, fuck. Nate doesn’t have a lot of experience with relationships, but he knows that’s never a good sign. Nate knows that you know him well enough to have figured out that he was drunk last night, so you probably don’t expect him to be up yet. He takes advantage of that time by taking a shower and brushing his teeth at least four times until he can no longer taste the tequila in the back of his throat, making a cup of coffee and having a freak out at his kitchen counter because surely you’re going to tell him to never talk to you again. Not only did he not have the balls to tell you how he feels about you, he also acted like an asshole to a guy you apparently like – although Nate has no clue why, because he seemed boring as hell – and then he nearly kissed you but instead ran away. Not a great track record. It’s nearly noon when he finally gathers up the courage to call you. After all, you’ve given him two years of friendship, so that’s the least he can do. “Hey,” he says softly into the phone when the connection clicks through. “It’s Nate.” “I know,” you answer, and he’s surprised by how light your tone is. “I have caller ID, Nate. Have had it for years.” It throws him off, how normal you sound. There’s nothing in your voice to betray that you’re mad at him, or that you hate him. He almost forgets what he was going to say. Almost, but not quite. “I’m really sorry about last night,” he blurts out. “Do you mind if I come over so we can talk about it?” “Uhm,” you hesitate, and Nate’s heart sinks into the pit of his stomach.    “Actually, I’m almost at your apartment.” “Oh.” Nate had not expected that. “Uhm, okay. I’ll be here, then.” You laugh. “Yeah, I hoped you would be. See you in a bit, Nate.”    It takes you another 6 minutes to arrive; Nate knows it’s exactly 6 because he stares at the hands of the clock while he waits, while simultaneously thinking of all the possible scenarios in which you could break his heart. When you walk into the kitchen, he feels like he’s about to throw up. “You don’t look great,” is the first thing you say to him. “Have you had breakfast? You know hangovers get worse when you don’t eat.” And that’s... Not quite what Nate was expecting. “Yoohoo, Nate?” You wave your hand in front of his pale face, as Nate stares at you and doesn’t speak. “Are you okay?” “You hate me,” Nate blurts out then, and instantly his eyes fix on the floor in shame. “Or, you should.” You frown. “Why? Because you were a jealous dick last night?” Nate’s face turns from white to a bright shade of pink. You smile, walk to Nate who’s sitting on a barstool at the counter, and carefully push open his knees, so you can slide in between his legs. If Nate’s eyes go any wider, you worry they might fall out.   “Last night,” you repeat, “you were jealous. Of Tom.” It’s not a question, but Nate still nods, avoiding your eyes as he does. “And then you were going to kiss me.” Not a question either, and this time Nate doesn’t respond. “Nate,” you say softly, and the warmth in your tone must be what finally gets Nate to look up at you, his eyes locking with yours. “Do you still want to kiss me?” “I do,” Nate says. His voice is a little shaky but he needs to get this out, because he needs you to know this. “I always want to kiss you.” “Why haven’t you?” you ask. The answer is not really an answer, but it means everything anyway. “I almost did,” Nate says. “So many times, Y/N. So many times I almost did.” “Almost, almost,” you repeat, rolling your eyes, and then you slide your hands behind Nate’s neck and kiss him. He almost stumbles, his hands gripping your waist as if he’s afraid he’ll fall right onto the floor if he doesn’t have something to hold onto. But he’s kissing you back right away, his mouth soft yet forceful at the same time. Like he’s never going to stop kissing you. You don’t think you ever want him to.

--

It’s late at night and the streets of Denver are quiet beneath Nate’s apartment.    He’s laying on his back and you’re draped across his chest, naked bodies tangled together under the sheets. He’s not sure if you’re asleep; your breathing is shallow and even, but every now and then your fingers tighten around where they’re wrapped around his arm, and he wonders if you’re dreaming, or simply checking if he’s still there. As if he would ever leave. Nate can’t help himself; he lightly presses his lips against your hair, the ghost of a kiss against your skin. You hum softly. “Nate?” “Yeah,” he whispers. “It’s me.” A lazy giggle escapes your lips. “Thank God it’s not someone else.” The silence returns, but this time it’s heavy with something Nate knows you’re not saying. “What are you thinking about?” he mumbles, tracing circles on the naked skin of your back. Your answer shakes something inside of him. “That I almost didn’t get to have this.” He thinks of all the times he almost said something to you but didn’t, and curses himself for all the time lost. “Almost didn’t, but we did, and that’s what matters, right?” he speaks into the darkness.

You smile.

You know you’re not dreaming, but you almost can’t believe you aren’t.

Almost. 

[neerasrealm]

Liu Comes Home

A story about Liu finally getting to talk to his brother again after years of not seeing each other. Mostly fluff with some comfort and a couple swears :)

Word Count: 2213

If you told Liu Woods five years ago he'd be sitting at a table mostly full of inhuman creatures next to his precious younger brother who was burned and scarred beyond recognition, he wouldn't believe you, and would be horrified at the idea of something so horrible happening to his only brother. 

But here he was, hands around a mug of coffee, next to Jeff, who had somehow been burnt completely white years ago and had massive gashes in his cheeks, along with black hair. Though that part didn't unsettle Liu, his brother had always said he wanted black hair instead of brown. Their parents would never let him even touch a bottle of dye though. 

Not that it mattered now- they were dead. Killed four years ago. By Jeff.

"So, Liu," Liu's thoughts were interrupted by the faceless white creature sitting just across from him. The creature was known as Slender, though he'd noticed a few of the people here, including Jeff, called him dad. "Tell us about yourself."

"Oh- well..." Liu looked at his younger brother, who was looking at him eagerly, probably curious and excited to hear about what he'd been doing the past four years. He looked away from Jeff and along the rather large dining table. There were a lot of people here- all of them odd. There was a clown looking man sitting next to Slender, who spoke in the thickest cockney accent Liu had ever heard, and next to him was a grey-skinned...creature, who wore a mask. He definitely wasn't human, that was for sure. There were normal looking ones too though. A small girl in a pink dress, who Jeff and the clown man seemed rather affectionate towards and a blonde boy who looked very pale, but relatively normal- if you ignored his pointy ears. The only name he knew was Toby. A boy who looked like he could only be seventeen. He knew Toby's name because he'd been driving the car Jeff used to kidnap him.

"Well uh- I'm nineteen- twenty in a couple months. Uh-" it'd been a long time since he'd had to open up to someone who wasn't a therapist or job interviewer. He sighed. "Well, you all know I'm Jeff's older brother. I- well after...everything...I was moved to the next city over by a social worker. Got put in foster care and taken in by a really nice family," Liu glanced at Jeff, who was smiling up at him. Probably glad to hear he had been doing okay. "They looked after me until I finished highschool, sent me to therapy and stuff. Then I went to college for a couple semesters...dropped out..." Liu scratched at his neck. "I couldn't really handle it, said I'd go back after a year or two off but- my foster parents insisted I got a job." He leaned back in his chair. 

"You got a second set of parents and they were assholes too?" Jeff spoke up. 

"Yikes." Toby murmured from the end of the table. 

"Eh- you don't need college anyways." The grey-skinned creature commented as he rested his trainers against the edge of the table. Slender shot him a glare that went unnoticed. 

"T-They weren't that bad!" Liu said quickly. "They were really nice, paid for my therapy, encouraged me to be open...I liked them." He smiled reassuringly at Jeff, who relaxed a bit. Liu relaxed too. He knew Jeff could be hot headed when it came to Liu. They were protective of each other- which unfortunately ended in Liu ending up in juvie and Jeff committing a string of murders. Hopefully Jeff wouldn't murder Liu's foster parents. Hopefully. "Anyway, I got a job as a cashier, and promised my parents I'd get an apartment by June this year but....it's July now and uh-" Liu glanced away. "I've kinda been sleeping in shelters and hostels for the past month."

"I'm sorry to hear that." Slender said. Liu sighed and glanced aside with a sad smile.

"It's okay- being kicked out is actually the reason I'm here," he said, brightening up a bit. "I got moved far away from our old house, for my mental health and stuff, but now that I don't have my foster parents keeping me away, I was able to come to the area." He smiled. "I knew Jeff was probably still around, I looked at the news and the stuff and guessed he was behind some of the murders going on- or at least were going on," Liu glanced at Jeff. "Did you stop?" He asked awkwardly. He never thought he'd have to ask his baby brother if he had stopped committing murders but here he was.

"Ehh- yeah," Jeff scratched at his neck and shrugged. "Slender kinda- wouldn't let me. Plus I- feel kinda bad about it now-" Oh, Jeff felt remorse. That was good. "Wait you were looking for me?" Jeff suddenly said. He looked up at Liu in surprise.

"I mean- why wouldn't I be?" Jeff looked stunned. "You're my brother. I needed to make sure you were okay. I was worried about you, I mean-" Liu glanced aside. "I was so scared that you were out there somewhere hurt or- or dead-" he added, his voice soft. Jeff stared up at him sadly. Liu looked at him, then glanced at the rest of the table. He cleared his throat. "Uh- anyway, it worked out!"

He heard Toby laugh at the end of the table. "You're lucky! Me and Jeff were getting snacks for a movie- if the Kroger's weren't closed for construction you would've missed us!" The brown haired boy grinned at him. Toby was- odd- he looked normal enough, but had a huge gash in his left cheek where you could see his teeth in his mouth. He also had a tendency to twitch, Liu had noticed, but he seemed nice. He'd watched him and Jeff talk on the car ride to the mansion Slender and everyone else lived in. They joked a lot, both as reckless and stupid as each other. He made Jeff laugh a lot, which was nice. Really nice.

Slender sipped from his mug of coffee- somehow- Liu wasn't sure how exactly he did that. "Well we're glad to finally meet you Liu," for an eight foot tall creature of nightmares, Slender was very nice. Soft-spoken and kind- almost fatherly. Slender placed down his coffee before saying "I suppose you'd like to get settled into your room around now? It sounds like you could use some rest." 

"M-My room?" 

"Yeah! This place is huge, you could stay!" Jeff piped up. He grinned eagerly at Liu. "You don't have anywhere else to go, right? S-So you could stay here-!" Jeff looked so eager and full of hope- Liu's expression softened and he smiled. 

"...I don't see why not." He replied. Jeff beamed. 

"I'll show you up," Slender said as he stood up. He looked at Liu. "Do you want to take a shower?"

"Uh- yeah that'd be great."

"EJ, get your feet off the table and turn the hot water on for Liu." Slender looked at the grey creature, who groaned in protest. 

"You had it comin'." Liu heard Toby murmur as he left the kitchen, with Jeff behind him. Slender grabbed Liu's overstuffed backpack, lifting it up. 

"Careful- it's heavy-" Liu said. Slender didn't seem to have trouble with it. Liu grabbed his guitar case. He turned to reach for his other instrument, his saxophone, only to realise Jeff already had it. 

"You still play?" The boy asked. Liu smiled and nodded.

"Course I do, what else am I supposed to do with myself?" He replied as they followed Slender up the stairs. "I actually went to college for music too, it was the only major I could think of-" he laughed a bit. "Music history was mandatory, and boring as hell." 

"Eugh- history??" Jeff's disgust made Liu smile. They stopped at the top of the stairs and Jeff pointed to the right. "My room's at the end of the hall." He told him. Liu glanced down the hall and nodded before following after Slender again. 

As Liu passed one of the doors, painted pink with a castle shaped sign on the front, creaked open. He looked over his shoulder and stopped. Staring out at him was a blonde girl with pitch black eyes. Liu smiled nervously. He stopped and turned to her. He raised a hand in greeting. "uhh- hey!" He greeted. Jeff looked over at the girl.

"Oh! Hey Dina. This is Liu, my brother." Jeff smiled at the girl, who glared at him and swiftly shut the door. Jeff glanced at Liu. "She doesn't like me much- but she'll probably like you!" 

Liu nodded and started walking again. "Why doesn't she like you...?" He asked. 

"Oh- uh- says I'm a sinner and stuff- I can't really blame her I mean...I've killed a lot of people, not to mention theft, breaking and entering, some arson-"

"Arson?!" Liu stared at Jeff in horror. After being burnt horribly four years ago you'd think he'd stay away from fire like- forever.

"I was trying to burn the bodies and it- it got outta control..." Jeff looked away embarrassedly. Liu nodded slowly and looked over at Slender, standing patiently outside a room. Liu and Jeff walked over to him and he opened the door, walking inside. Liu stepped in and looked around. The room had simple grey walls and black curtains. 

"I hope you don't mind the state of things- this room is pre-owned, but everything should be in order." Slender said as he set down Liu's backpack. Liu tilted his head, and Jeff nodded towards the wall by the door. There were scratch marks in the wall, and a few red stains that may have been blood. 

"Michael used to live in here- he uh- moved to the basement because he kept waking people up and felt bad," Jeff explained. "You're lucky though! You're next to Helen, and he's really quiet, so you'll sleep pretty good." 

Liu looked at Jeff and nodded slowly. So he still hadn't met everyone, clearly. Vacantly he wondered how many people were in this house. Not that he minded- he liked people. 

"Do you need help unpacking?" Slender asked. Liu set down his guitar case against the wall and shook his head.

"No, I can handle it. I don't have a lot of stuff." He gave Slender a small smile. Slender nodded and left the room. Liu turned around and looked at Jeff, still watching him. "...This seems like a nice place." He said.

"Yeah- yeah it is, Slender is real nice and everyone is fun...I- see pretty much everyone here as a sibling..." Jeff smiled sheepishly, looking at the ground. 

"You're happy?"

"Yeah." Jeff looked up at Liu for a moment. He opened his mouth, like he wanted to say something, then closed it. Liu tilted his head. "...I missed you." His voice was soft and meek, and made Liu remember the bright eyed baby brother he'd grown up with. Jeff had to be almost seventeen now, right? He'd missed seeing his brother grow up- 

"I missed you too, Jeff." Liu stepped forward and rested his hand on Jeff's shoulder. "But I'm glad you're safe- ...I think the part that messed me up most was the idea of you getting hurt- or- or killed."

"I'm sorry." Jeff stared at the ground. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I-I-" 

Liu stared at him in surprise. Jeff was shaking, as was his voice. "Hey- hey bro calm down it's okay-"

Jeff grit his teeth. "No it's not." He replied, anger leaking into his voice. His hands curled into fists. "I-I- I tried to kill you-"

"Jeff-"

"I killed our fucking parents! And you're standing here like I didn't ruin your whole life!" Jeff glared up at him, tears leaking out of his eyes. He had no eyelids, so they just flowed quickly and freely. 

Liu suddenly pulled Jeff into a tight hug, pressing his brother's face into his chest. "Hey, it's alright," he knew what this was. Jeff had always been prone to bursts of anger. His mood could switch in a matter of seconds sometimes. "I'm not mad at you. Mom and dad- they...weren't great, and you were just protecting yourself." That was the detail that haunted Liu the most. His parents- their parents, who had raised Jeff for thirteen whole years pulled a gun on him. They were ready to kill him at the first sign of something being wrong. "I miss them sometimes- but I'd rather you were safe, and happy." 

He heard Jeff sniffle. His arms were tight around Liu, hugging him like he'd vanish into thin air at any moment. Liu patted him, running his hand through Jeff's hair. 

"I'm sorry..." Jeff murmured after a while.

"You're okay- I'm not mad about what you di-"

"Not that, for blowing up on you. Being emotional and shit." 

"Oh." Liu looked down at his brother, who pulled away and rubbed the tears off his face. There was silence for a few moments before Liu spoke up again. "You wanna help me unpack? I got a lotta stuff."