#anyways yes this show gives me gender envy no i dont know why
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#milo.txt#kekkaishi#yoshimori sumimura#tokine yukimura#masamori sumimura#sen kagemiya#gen shishio#madarao#shu akitsu#got everyone#anyways yes this show gives me gender envy no i dont know why
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💞 MC is a Genshin Simp 💞
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{ AN: Omg! This is my first ask so thank you anon (๑ↀᆺↀ๑)/!! This is such a vibe too haha, I hope you like it! } Warnings: None [Maybe Refs and Chars you wont get if you dont play Genshin Impact] * Probably a bit OOC too *
Reader: Gender-Neutral [Default]
( ⓛ ω ⓛ *)
========
< Genshin Impact was a game that took the human realm by storm, with its open-world gameplay, its competitive PvE and aesthatic settings, it was truly something that captured you the moment the beta was announced. Although, as with any Gacha games, you weren’t only attracted to the world and its setting.
No no.
The characters were truly the main eye candy of the game. You’d been worried that when you had been sucked into Devildom, you wouldn’t be able to access the game due to, yknow, realm differences, but luckily that wasn’t the case thanks to Levi, and hence why the moment it dropped, you had been spending your life savings simping for characters on every banner.
Yknow theres handsome bois in devildom too... Theyre just kinda waiting for you to put your game down for a moment and kinda notice em ~((Φ◇Φ)‡ >
------
ฅ⁽͑ ˚̀ ˙̭ ˚́ ⁾̉ฅ Lucifer
He usually doesn’t mind you playing games
Although, He would’ve preferred if you didn’t cause you kinda need to focus on your studies yknow?
But hey he’s not stopping you
Usually you would stay with him as he works, but he can’t seem to focus with you constantly begging beside him
Small little ‘please’ would be heard every now and then, and a sudden look of disappointment would show on your face.
He tried to ignore it, even giving little cues for you to quiet down, like clearing his throat
You didnt seem to pick up the hint though
He was just about to ask you what you were doing in the first place that has you praying beside him (which is hella rude) but your scream of happiness has him a little more irked and kinda taken back
“LUCIFER! I GOT HIM! LOOK LOOK I GOT HIM!”
You show him the screen showing your pull results
The character held a giant claymore with bright red hair
Before he can get another word in, you snatch your phone back and just sigh as if youd just had a heavenly (ironic) experience and mumble
“I seriously love him, Im so happy...”
Bro same though, Diluc pls come home
You were truly one of a kind, because youve just managed to break the Avatar of Pride’s... well.... Pride.
Did he just get cucked by a man in a video game?
Truly outrageous.
He seems to scoff and holds back a bit of an eye roll as he tries to focus back on his work
But boy oh boy, his salt is high
“If you are going to be causing a ruckus MC, May i suggest you doing it with Levi instead, I have no time for such games. I dont see why youre so caught up in such a character anyways, he looks quite basic.”
His words were sharp, and that was enough to shake you out of your fangirl/boy mode.
You were literally ready to fight the first born, a literal fucking fallen angel, for dissing Diluc like that
like
how dare
But then you notice how he seems to avoid your gaze and a small little red tint was on the tip of his ears.
Lucifer wouldve wanted to see you that happy with him, but no, a game character steals that spotlight.
Angey.
Instead of being intimidated by the sudden coldness, you giggle and finally close your phone and set it aside
You can continue celebrating and bragging about it later, for now, you wrap your arms around his arm and give him a small smooch on the cheek, which definitely makes him blush a tad bit
“Awww Luci dont be like that, Yknow I love you more”
Potential apocalypse has been diverted
But Lucifer does smile the smallest of smiles as he sighs, finding it silly to really get jealous over such a small thing and says
“I love you too, my dear... but you do have to make up for distracting me from my work...”
Well you kinda deserve it, so it wasnt long before both his work and your phone had been ditched
( After a while you do kinda see him quite similar to Diluc and it just makes you smile everytime you think about it, seems you have a thing for the strict cold men huh?)
===
Σ(‘◉⌓◉’) Mammon
Why you simping for a fictional character when you already have him?!
He’s your first man!
Your homie!
“Yeah well hes my first 5* so can you blame me?”
S A D N E S S
But for real, this man is just so clingy
He has heard from Levi that you were playing a new game from the human world, and of course, he had wanted to see what it was about by watching you play.
But since it was quite grind-heavy gacha game, he grew a bit bored and asked you to come with him to hang out somewhere else, or even go to the casino and gamble his money away cause he just got goldie back
But no matter what he suggests, you were just so focused on your grinding.
He’d prefer a different kinda grinding right about now with how lonely he is, ya feel me?
But no, you still werent interested.
“Oi! Cmon MC, whats even so important about this?”
“I already told you Mammon, Im grinding for primogems from the event! Theyre gonna be gone soon and I just HAVE to get them! Ugh I swear to Diavolo, if I dont, Imma cry! I didnt get him on their first banner too... ugh!”
Wait no--
Cmon he doesnt want you to cry!
Mammon kinda stays silent for a bit as he watches you struggle to fight the monsters with your low level team, frustration growing on your face.
But as you finish, Mammon seems to snatch your phone
“Hey! whats the big deal Mammon?!”
“Shut up and show me where the store is geez”
Mammon’s demands kinda surprises you and you raise an eyebrow at him, but you do show where it was, and sit back for a while as Mammon just fiddles around with it. You werent sure what he was doing honestly, was he interested? Did you say anything that made him act this way? All you talked about the game was the gacha system so--
oh…
OH
“Mammon! Wait you dont have to---”
“There! I got you as much primo things, or whatever theyre called”
He already has tossed you your phone back and he crossed his arms, looking away as the red blush covers most of his cheeks.
You look at your phone and you honestly felt your heart speed up and stop at the same time at the amount of primos on your account, it was enough for a full 180 pull! If you dont get the limited character on the first 50-50, you have another shot!
You felt your own heart speed up and your face burn so hard, but you do mumble him a quick “But... But why though?”
“Cuz! If you start cryin’ Lucifer’s gonna beat my ass! Dont think I did it for you, you human! I just dont want him taking away Goldie again!”
“But I thought this was your gambling money, isnt it?”
“w-well!... I mean... Hmph.. Gachas kinda like gambling right?, I know Lucifers gonna hang me if he catches me in the casino again anyways, so I thought I might as well just do this... with you...or whatever...” Hes dying, help
But so are you!
Hes too fucking cute and you just glomp him and just hug him as tight as you can!!
Flusterred boi 100
But you do spend you afternoon on his lap, both of you rolling the full 180 in excitement, whether you get that boi/gal you simped for on the banner or not, you still were happy to spend some time with Mammon
He doesnt mind losing a bit of cash for you
but you do promise to pay him back (maybe with a few kissy)
But to be honest, Gacha probably will help him with his gambling addiction...
kinda...
He doesnt go to casinos anymore but he does whale with you now
Lucifer has such a mix feeling with these results.
But he still confiscates Goldie and your card on the end, yall need to chill.
====
ヽ(。_°)ノ Leviathan
He probably wasn’t even interested on the game at first
He already has enough games to play, and it just looks like another rip off of some other game he saw not too long ago with that elf looking guy
But when you came to him asking for his help to get the game, you bet your ass that he felt a switch click
Suddenly it was incredibly interesting!
You do share your interests to him almost immediately
By interests, of course i mean the peeps you simp for
The sexy ara ara in the library of mondstat, the pirate looking ass of the guards, the pirate looking ass’s brother thats a wine owner and still highkey reminds you of Lucifer, the demon slayer--- You were actually unsure if you should talk about Xiao but hey hes cool
You explain it all!
From their lore to their voice lines and whatever
But honestly what do you expect from the Avatar of Envy?
Of course hes gonna be a bit jealous! He cant compare to any of these characters! Hes not as witty as that eye patch man, hes not as sophisticated as that red head, hes not as flirty as that ara ara either!
As you go on, you notice that Levi was kinda... half listening....
It made you pout, but then, it made you worried
Uh-oh you know that look
its that, ‘im overthinking’ look
So to snap him out of it, you kinda grab his face as gently as you can
“Need Grimm for your thoughts?”
He flushes and he immediately looks away, but you usher him to look at you as you coo and ask him whats wrong
It takes a bit till he kinda explains to you how hes feeling
In your relationship, you both were practicing being more open with each other, hence why you were proud of Levi for saying it
but you did feel kinda sad and frowned as he finishes explaining
“You... feel jealous?”
“Ugh d-dont say it out loud normie....”
He covers his face with his arm and you just cant help but shake your head with a fond smile, but you do need to address this and comfort him.
“Levi... when you fanboy about Ruri chan, did you ever think she was better than me?”
Your question made him frown and look at you in absolute worry
Did you actually think that you were below Ruri chan?
Of course hes an absolute simp for Ruri but.. cmon
Now that he thinks about it, he does talk about her a lot doesnt he? oh no...
“MC O-Of course not! I love Ruri chan yes, but you... I... I Love... you more...” Levi exe do be dying
But you smile at his response and gently kisses his cheek
“I think thats sweet Levi... But thats how I am too... Youre still better than any of these characters, youre real and they arent, youre mine and I am yours~ Youre my personal 5 star!” You wink at him and Levi just dips
his heart couldnt handle the cuteness and he died, ladies and gentlemen
but for real he did pass out
Must be from all the blood on his head from the blush
But ah, he does get it, and after being showered with love from you, He kinda slowly got over his jealousy
its not immediate but with simple reassurances, you can manage to reel him in and have fun with you
He does end up enjoying the game cause he gets to spend time with you, and he gets to show off when events happen
He also goes out of his way to memorize locations for materials for you, and when youre sick or busy, he pilots your account
true gamer
But ironically enough hed probably start simping for a character too and of course, you both start bonding over that, which just makes Levi absolutely happy
I wonder if hed simp for Barbara, she is an idol afterall like Ruri chan
Probably lowkey for now
Afterall she looks like a minor so-----
( I dunno i searched shes 16-18 lol )
But regardless, I can imagine you both just cosplaying each others fav characters too
Its a wack looking ship cosplay but yall just simp for each other cause of it, its pretty fun but the rest of the brothers just finds it hella weird
----
I only have energy for these 3 as always, Im sorry! But i promise Ill do the rest!! I hope you guys do enjoy, and Id love some feedback on the characters personalities cause I know they can be a bit Ooc, But feel free to send me an ask! Im pretty open lol 〜( ̄△ ̄〜)
#Obey me#Obey me x reader#Obey me x mc#Obey me shall we date#obey me Mammon x reader#Obey me Lucifer x reader#Obey me Leviathan x reader#Obey me fanfic#Obey me HCs#anon request
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*sequel* to actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server
once again, it's out of context because x1000 funnier
also x1000 longer than previous post
"ur satan is gnc af"
"Bestie I’m already having gender envy over a fucking demon please"
"O_O ODEPIJHFbavevisdpvfhzdcnjawedsidjksjdkoeirjfmkdsoeirujdksodifjndmksoidfjdksidfj ITS" NOT IN MY FRAFTS IS SPEDNT 1 hour PN THAT SHIT"
"AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
"ohoho sexy"
"I am very proud of myself"
"himbo x edgy fuck"
"YOU COULD SQUISH HES CHEECKS"
"he has teefs"
"SQUASH"
"good for biting 📷"
"he's a himbo basically"
"B͂̒̄iͫ̍̈tͧ̓ͯè̄̇"
"bifth"
"i havent watched blue exorcist in years but mr okumura my beloved </3"
"MY LIFE QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED"
"is it important information to mention that the person i put up for my turn is the son of satan" "I know like 1 thing about everyone who isnt ranboo lmfao"
"crimes"
"tumblr sexyman"
"idk why but my first thought was cowboy onceler"
"I vibe with him but he is very long and twisty"
"steampunk e-girl"
"steampunk tumblr sexyman"
"Canonically bi crimelord I agree!!"
"OOO FRIEND SHAPED"
"ARTIST SIGHTED"
"they look like someone i would want to be friends with but is way cooler than me so i'd never actually talk to them"
"babby..... would die for him"
"honestly i probably kin him"
"i'm sure he's lovely but he looks way too much like my ex i'm sorry-"
"i'd be down for another rotation! i have another twink to show y'all"
"Also :00 blonde friend"
"Let us all infodhmo"
"Hsjagdvbs shhh im on phone"
"Nix woukd you like to joon?
"skitters away"
"I have two braincells and they both drink dumb bitch juice"
"oof wait whats the order again i have 0 memory"
"i want to bond with him over cosplay-"
"Awkwardly watches in band kid"
"One day I'm gonna a broadway star"
"which isnt to say they were bad. they were just fortnite dancing during rehersals"
"I threw it so hard my glasses flew off and slid under the stage right divider"
"anyway heres my boi"
"emo"
"haha emo"
"virgil sanders kinnie"
"he looks like he listens to my chemical panic at the fallout boy"
"Bro I bet he'd kick my ass with his deck"
"bird man my beloved"
"fuck i had so much to say and then i forgot it all"
"Birds!!"
"guiguhuh"
"crabrave"
"She sounds like someone I would end up stealing her personality"
"yess name collector gang"
"alias glass aiden haven absinthe fish brick rice"
"But I have Cypress, Remure, Genesis, Lemres, and Comet"
"And she's named after a mars candy bar bc alien"
"Hey, if plato went by plato, you can be king thief"
"im not dissing my gramma like that shfojd"
"My dad has seven legal names" "bitches be like *looks at fictional character* *steals their name* it's us we're bithces"
"coraline lowkey traumatized me but i adore it regardless"
"mmmmmm magic man :]"
"°0° green man"
"criminal (affectionate)"
"he would shoplift a candy bar from walmart and then brag to all of his friends about the sick stealing he did"
"despite the fact he's canonically been capable of overpowering a minor deity"
"i would commit so many crimes for him"
"Very babey"
"Yes please tell green man he is very pog"
"he also keeps a lot of dumb secrets"
"but I will sorely miss the chaos and energy of this here chat until I wake again" (by request XD)
"i just say words and if they're funny then they're funny"
"* or extremly chaotic either works"
"at this point we are just taking turns rambling"
"oH--"
"bc my brain has a schedule"
"Hopefully they have gyoza there or I will lose my mind"
"hehe yes spooky man"
"my ghost glucose guardian"
"the head of the undead group that lives there, and we end up dating. (yes I date a ghost, no I will not be taking constructive criticism /lh)"
"ghosts r just inherently sexy"
"i mean im becoming a squid thing so"
"Raven quirk raven quirk!!"
"ł â m p"
"łæmp"
"mothman: ooh lamp you look very nice today! do you come here often? mothman: wait shit no"
"I'd date a ghost"
"mine is still accurate, i am still sobbing (/j)"
"p e e p e e"
""@nick wilde is a tumblr sexyman" is the best thing i have ever seen"
"im sorry im cackling like a dying hyena"
"you're all 12 year olds"
"PEENIE"
"He once caused global warming on accident so he could get a tan"
"god, what a himbo. i love him"
"that reminds me of my friends kin assigned me jesus"
"Man outside of battle be like: princely crying but then in battle hes like: "CATACLYSM! DISASTER! DEVASTATION!" Chill out man"
"Every time I talk about satan it never fails to shock people it's my favorite thing to do"
"im kin assigning him roman sanders" ""Oh yeah he caused global warming because he wanted to get girls" "he what""
"oh damn i forgot satan was straight"
"twink appreciation club"
"give us the twinks"
"my first thought was bottom-"
"so many people to try and get his dad to love him"
"daddy issued"
"OH MY GOD ITS WILBUR"
"Big boy but"
"anyways janus is swagggg"
"........................."
"gib twink"
"give twink then i will share"
"holds him gentle like hamburger"
"This dumb bitch opened a book that said "do not open" and got possessed by a little bastard"
"he is. fragile creachur"
"klug is beauty klug is grace i would let him step on my face"
"If I'm playing swap and I have to hear one more "Pwanet Powew" Im gonna lose it"
"Who is to blame? Pandora or the box?"
"Bakugo isnt my type but I respect the drip"
"i say like my type isnt long-haired pretty boys and girls that look so gnc that people have a history of confusing them for men"
"hes a gremlin and i can appreciate a pretty gremlin"
"that is to say i am attracted to VFlower vocaloid. This is a confession."
"note i am a lesbian"
"You may like Schezo wegey"
"why does he have one single expression"
"soul soul eater passes the vibe check"
"magic wand"
"I Want To Hold His Hand"
"i would commit a war crime for him any war crime idc which one"
"my favorite one is when he sounded rlly gay because he said "Muscular bodies keep me satisfied""
"p e a n u t"
"Klug is a homophobic homosexual its just facts"
"grug from the croods is peak male performance"
"jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair Ahem, you look very lovely."
"tag yourself im the fireworks shooting from the top of the head"
"i like essays"
"central time gang"
"11:11 pog-" (wait... is that a suprise angel number?? yes it is lovelies just for you <3)
"Then again im also a dumbass bitch who wonders what the souls in soul eater taste like. SERIOUSLY THOUGH. THEY LOOK TASTY AS HELL!!!! LIKE GODDAMN BRO YOU'RE MAKING ME FUCKING HUNGRY. Like. that shit- it's Bone Apple motherfucking Teeth. hell yea my guy. Im hongy now.... shlorp I'm seriously considering this. Like. They seem kinda like a liquid? But a solid? Are they like jello? The fuck they taste like my guy???? I keep imagining they're like sour, like sour candy maybe? Or do they taste salty? Sweet? Maybe some combo of two? Do they even have a taste or is it about the texture? The sensation? God my mouth is watering what the hell. I am starving. I think I need to go get a cookie. I'm gonna go get a cookie. Brb. I'm better. I'm still craving souls though. Which is a weird-ass cringey thing to say but I'm being dead-ass rn. They just.... look tasty???? And I wanna eat one. Thus. I am shifting to Soul Eater for the express purpose of satisfying my fucking cravings. enjoy"
"points were made"
"jello? more like helloooo schloooAHFJDSDAIDWNALDHSJKDAIDANDM"
"WAIT I THINK I HAVE AN ANIME GIRL BITING VIDEO TOO"
"anime girl voice: mmm! mm... ahhhhmp!! mmm, mmm... aaahmp!"
"i think it sounds great i'm going to start eating like that"
"several people are typing"
"do these look edible to you"
"forbidden gummies"
"when I was on lsd I couldn't eat my fruit gummies because I thought they were alive because they had little faces on them"
"oh shit yeah don't do drugs"
"anyways general consensus is puyos are edible, ty for your input everyone"
"everypony is a word so powerful it can bring nations to its knees"
"pls the self control it's taking me not to say "hewwo everypony" in gen chat when someone new joins-"
"hewwo evewrypony uwu deaw cewestia i hopwe it doewsnt wain owo"
"ive cooked up a sowution wiwth the knowwege ive acwued. they say a kitcwen time saves niwne, but im just savwing two. Ive gathewwed the inwedients to make a time sowbet. Thewe's hawdly woom fow seconds when the seconds mewt away."
"I had a ten year old sister... you know what happened to her??? very sad, very tragic... she turned eleven....."
"NIIICE"
"Guts dont say the secks word :( /j"
"watch your fucking language in front of the president"
"im so sorry lumi"
"i think you're like ehhhh 8/10 funny"
"now me???? 10/10. Hilarious"
"sometimes i have to take a step back and remember that this is the same guts i follow on tumblr /lh"
""ok every here's some good shifting advice!!! uwu have a good day" "yeah i did lsd and ate fruit gummies""
"i have one setting and it's whatever this is"
"my bitch ass cat just pushed the door open with his fuzzy face and now my sleeping dad is being lulled into dreams by Cosmo Sheldrake's 'Pliocine'."
"me on discord: nick wilde"
"me on tumblr: shifting water! haha funne! me on here: my hermit crabs are cannibals also i want to eat souls."
"im sorry yOUR VIBESA RE JUST SO DIFFERNT"
"u give off older cousin ive never spoken to but always admire at the family gatherings vibes"
"what the fuck"
"BC I HAVE LIBERTU"
"If you adopt me then yes"
"am I qualified for dad jokes???"
"we're all a lot smarter on tumblr"
"I'm like "awww... sweet... sweet little shiftlings... posting such sweet shiftling content... so pure, so wholesome... does not even know abcs....""
"can't think before you speak if you never think B)"
"I'm not responsible enough to be a mom"
"cat pet"
"show us pictures of the cat or i will do Crime"
"maybe thats me being a coward tho"
"MOTH!!!! MOTH MY BELOVED"
if y'all want I can make this a series bc shiftblr keeps giving me more content
#tw drugs#tw swearing#tw cannibalism#tw crime#tw food#tw homophobia#shitpost#out of context#out of context quotes#lumi's quotes
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Tick-Tock, Hook’s Afraid of an Ordinary Clock! || Spencer Reid
Requested: YES/NO: gender neutral please! So my request. Y/n has been working at the BAU for a while, and never ever had feelings for Spencer but more for Derek. One night is spent at a hotel and Spencer gets wasted as all hell which the team found unusual. That’s really all! Do with that what you will! Smut is fine too! You can add your own personal touches if you wish. Also would love some fighting between Spencer and y/n
Gender: none, they/them.
Warnings: insults, alcohol, normal CM case talk, verbal fight dialogue taken from Hook (1991), crap music talk.
----
“Eat your heart out, you crinkled, wrinkled fat bag,” you mumbled under your breath as Spencer finished his rambling of some unknown subject. Spencer stiffened at your insult, as did the rest of the team. You had just gotten back from a pretty bad case involving a team of family annihilators and where sitting in the nearest bar; throughout the whole case Spencer had almost made it his mission to speak over you, correct you, flick things at you, ‘forget’ you’re there, bump into you and more. God it was so annoying, and now? Now you've had enough.
“That was very ill-mannered-” Spencer started.
“And you're a slug-eating worm,” you said with a little more force matter-of-factly, cutting off whatever it was Spencer was going to say.
“You can do better than that pretty boy!” Derek said quickly with a grin as he nudged Spencer; you almost pounced on that man for taking Spencer's side rather than yours; Derek had always taken your side.
“You're encouraging this?” Spencer questioned quickly.
“Show me your fastball, dust brain!” you started again, “you paunchy, sag-bottomed puke pot!” Spencer's eyes widened three times the size they normally would be as the rest of your table sat quiet and watched.
“Damn!” Emily said under her breath with a grin as her eyes darted between the two of you; it was like watching tennis.
“You're a very poor role model for your team, you know that right?” Spencer shook his as he took a mouthful of his drink before a sly grin overtook his face, “I bet you don't even have a fourth-grade reading level,” a few of your teammates let out a little blow of air.
“Hemorrhoidal sucknavel” you said quickly.
“Maybe a fifth-grade reading level.” Spencer said even quicker.
“Oil-dripping, beef-fart-sniffing bubble butt” you started to really get into it, leaning over the table a little with a smirk.
“Aye there we go (Y/n)!” Derek said quickly, now he was on your side? You looked to Hotch who was smiling thinking that maybe you had another on your side.
“Someone has a severe caca mouth, you know that?” Spencer cut off your gaze with his words, as if he was bored.
“You’re a fart factory. A slug-slime sack of rat guts and cat vomit, a cheesy scab picked pimple-squeezing finger bandage!” snickering came over the table; but you weren't done yet oh no, “a week-old maggot burger with everything on it and flies on the side!” you grinned; many many words in that one insult. Spencer went to open his mouth but you cut him off, “you’re really just a substitute chemistry teacher” you winked.
“Come on Spence, hit (Y/n) back!” J.J. quickly intervened.
“Mung tongue” Spencer fired.
“Math tutor,”
“Pinhead,”
“Mother lover,” that one was a low blow on your end but you couldn't help yourself.
“Nearsighted gynecologist,” ouch Spence, Hotch snorted at that one.
“In your face, camelcake!” you shot back.
“In your rear, cow derrière!” of course Spencer came back even faster.
“Lying, crying, spying, prying ultra-pig!” Emily snickered at yours.
“Lewd, crude bag of pre-chewed food!” Derek snickered at Spencers.
“Guys maybe settle down…” Hotch said softly, this was starting to get a little out of hand.
“You man! Stupid, stupid man!” That was all you could give back as your mind turned blank, forgetting every word in the dictionary.
“If I'm a maggot burger, why don't you just eat me?” Spencer shot back, “you zebra-headed, slime-coated, pimple-farming, paramecium brain, munching on your own mucus, suffering from Spencer Reid envy!” laughter ensued as your face contorted to confusion.
“What the hell is a ‘paramecium’?” your voice held the question as Spencer pointed to you.
“I'll tell you what a paramecium is! You’re a paramecium!” everyone on your table stared at Spencer as he elaborated; “It's a one-celled critter with no brain that can't think!” and with that, your table cheered for Spencer as you sat sulking.
“Oh come on (Y/n), you should have known you would lose,” Derek said with a grin before following Spencer to the bar.
“He's drinking a lot tonight isn't he?” Emily questioned.
“Who, Derek?” J.J. guessed with a furrowed brow.
“No! Spencer!” Emily quickly concluded.
“He was a little harsh on (Y/n)” Hotch cut in quickly, “I’m just glad Dave and Garcia weren’t here to witness that,” you slammed your drink on the table and sent a glare to the three left at the table.
“I'm going home, i'll see everyone on monday,” you grumbled out before stalking off, your shoes made loud thunking sounds as they hit the wood flooring, your anger getting the best of you as you passed Spencer and Derek.
“Yo (Y/n) you getting a drink too?” Derek was about to order your normal drink until you slapped both Spencer and Derek on the back of the head.
“OW! What the hell-!” Spencer's back was to you but as he turned and saw you his anger melted into elation, “come back for round 2 (Y/n)?” Spencer questioned, the poor boy tried to act cool and lean against the bar but missed entirely and almost fell onto a rather burly looking gentleman. You huffed slightly as you turned to Derek.
“Make sure the substitute chem teacher gets home safe,” and with that you threw open the bar doors and walked your way home, it was only a block and you had gotten a ride with Emily anyway.
-
When you finally slumped home, chucked off your shoes and threw yourself onto your mattress you couldn't help but make yourself angrier with the new insults suddenly bubbling in your head.
“Who does that piss brain even think he is,” you mumbled into the air, “paramecium my ass…” you continued your grumbling into the atmosphere as you twisted and turned on the mattress before sleep finally engulfed you.
------
The work week started up again and before you knew it yourself and the team where needed in New Orleans because of a new range of sudden murders.
“Lets review please,” Hotch mumbled.
“The bodies cross gender and racial lines” Rossi started.
“The throat is slit with something very sharp but also clean, I get a funny feeling it isnt a kitchen knife though,” you mumbled as you looked at the photos closer trying to get a good angle on a printed piece of paper.
“Butcher?” Derek questioned, you shrugged.
“Could these be blitz attacks?” you heard Spencer scoff at your suggestion.
“If this was a blitz attack there would be remorse and blunt force trauma somewhere on the head,” Spencer said looking directly at you.
“Oh, i'm so sorry Doctor i didn't know my input was unwanted, let me just keep my thoughts to myself,”
“Guys,” J.J. sighed, “Garcia is going through the victims lives that we have already, I can talk to the family and see if there are any enemies?” Hotch nodded.
“Derek, I want you to join J.J. with the families. Rossi, Emily go to the M.E. together and have a look over the bodies and tox screens. (L/n), Reid and I will go to the police station and start on a geographical and victim board,” everyone nodded in agreement to what Hotch said. Except for Spencer. He just stared at you with dangerous eyes. You rolled yours in return before putting your headphones into your phone and playing music to drown out Spencer's overbearingly loud thoughts.
-
“Okay my lovelies, these first three victims all had the same job at the same court; they’re all a part of a Jury audience” Garcia explained as her fingers tapped on her keyboard through the phone.
“Maybe someone just got out of prison that was wrongly convicted and wanting revenge?” you questioned.
“Maybe, it would have to be something pretty big for them to come back,” Derek said, you nodded in agreement, “baby girl can you see if there are any people that may have been convicted by a jury with our victims in it?”
“Sure can sugar, PG out” the phone clicked off.
“Did you find anything from the M.E.?” Hotch turned to Rossi and Emily as he spoke.
“The pathologist said it was a clean cut without hesitation marks or remorse,” Rossi said.
“No drugs, no blunt force trauma,” Emily shrugged as she talked, “it wasn't a blitz.”
“Maybe planned?” you butted in.
“That’s what it seems like,” Hotch said, “Reid? Have you got anything? J.J.?” Hotch questioned as he looked to the respective people.
“The victims were killed in different areas but its places they frequented; house, bar, bar” Spencer started, “they’re all over the place is all, completely different areas,”
“Yeah, and the families weren’t much help either. One of the victims' families, uh, Emil Gosten? His family said they didn't want anything to do with the investigation because he's had previous death threats and calls and stuff,” J.J. shrugged as the room went quiet.
“Reid, (L/n) I know you two dont like each other but I need two of my sharpest minds to go back to the crime scenes,” Hotch sighed, you groaned but complied as you stalked off with Reid following shortly behind.
-
“Everything looks the exact same as it was left,” you sighed out as you placed a blanket back down on the couch. Spencer scanned the books on the shelf before pulling one out and starting to read it; completely ignoring you.
“Reid,” nothing.
“Reid.” again, nothing.
“Spencer,” nope.
“SPENCE”
“What!” he finally turned to you and answered.
“You couldn't give me some complacency and at least answer me when i talk to you?” you asked annoyed.
“Why would i?” Spencer asked with a bored tone as he placed the book back on the shelf, except he finally talked to you, “The victim is atheist, believes in the justice system…” he sighed and shrugged, “did Hotch just put us together to fuck with us?”
“Maybe,” you flopped onto the couch with a sigh as you rest your head on the backrest. That was until something caught your eye, “Oi genius!” you called out, Spencer came to your side as you pointed to the roof; there, above your heads was a piece of paper taped to the ceiling, “you’re taller than me,” you said quickly as you got up and started moving the couch.
“Woah what- what’re you doing?” Spencer jumped back slightly as you pushed the couch backwards.
“Well we’re going to push this back and then put a chair down for you to stand on so you can reach that note because it can possibly help us get to the unsub,”
“What why me?” Spencer questioned as he helped you push the couch back.
“You’re taller than me and have longer arms,” you walked over to the dining table and came back with a chair, Spencer was reluctant at first but eventually stood on the chair and plucked down the taped note; letting out a breath as he finally stood on the ground again. You plucked the note from Spencer's hand and opened it.
“A music note?” Spencer mumbled.
“Something like that,” you mumbled back, “see it's in the second to bottom gap,” you pointed to the gap to show where it was, as if Spencer couldn't see it already, ��um, it would sound something like...um, dmm” you vibrate your voice a little to help Spencer understand, he nodded, “the only problem is there isn’t any clef; normally with music you have a treble clef, alto clef or bass clef. They basically determine what instrument can be played and how the notes are determined” Spencer looked genuinely interested while you explained your thinking, “this...its a singular note, maybe there’s more around?” you looked around the room and tried to desifre if there were any opened drawers or cupboards.
“Maybe there’s another one at the other location?” Spencer questioned, you grinned.
“It might be the unsubs calling card; ‘hey, this is my kill’ type thing!” and with that, you made a break in the case.
-
Spencer called the rest of the team about the break as Hotch allowed the two of you to go to the other victims houses and search for more music notes; low and behold you now had 3 music notes placed under the corresponding victim heads.
“You keep staring at that board as if it's going to give you answers,” Derek said with a grin as he walked into the room; the rest of the team had been called out to another dead body.
“Hmm? Oh I just…” you shrugged, “i just get this feeling about the notes; they have to sound something but we just don't know what yet” before Derek could answer you the shrill of the phone went off.
“(Y/n)?” it was Spencer on loudspeaker; he never called you by your first name.
“Yeah what's up Reid?” you called back.
“We found another note; the round part is under the last line with the stem going up to the second line at the top,” you nodded in response (not that Spencer could see you) as you drew the note on a piece of paper with a sharpener and placed it on the victim board.
“Anything else? A clef at all anywhere?” you asked.
“Um i'm not- i don't think so?” it sounded like Spencer was shuffling around a few things to get a better look, “we have another piece of paper!” Spencer called out, moments later you got a photo on your phone. Sure enough there was a treble clef.
“Spence get everyone back here; i know what the notes mean”
-
“Our unsub is using something called the Dies Irae,” you played the first few notes on your phone over youtube, “you've all heard this song over time just not exactly in an orchestra setting; Star Wars, The Nightmare Before Christmas, The Corpse Bride, Sweeney Todd, The Shining, The Exorcist and many many more,” you played a few other videos of the notes from a few of the movies as everyone nodded.
“I can hear it,” J.J. mumbled.
“Same,” that was Emily.
“Right, so...it was originally used with catholic’s; they used the music in their Requiem services-”
“Requiem services are basically putting the dead to rest,” Spencer cut in quickly so the team could understand.
“Yeah, it's basically a song for the dead to stay dead in a way? I think our unsub is using the Sweeney Todd method; killing his victims with a razor. One slice across the neck while in a private area except this dude isn't a cannibal” you grinned at the remembrance of the film.
“Cannibal?” Derek and Emily questioned.
“In the movie Sweeney Todd is a barber, he comes back for revenge on the man who stole his wife and child and kills people in his barber shop which is also above a pie shop owned by a woman named Mrs Lovett; when Sweeney starts killing they come together in order to bring customers back to Mrs Lovett's pie shop. Because it's set in 1785 meat was expensive so instead they used the dead people as meat to sell to customers” you realised how long winded that explanation was and apologized, “sorry that was..i think our unsub is a barber” was your final statement. Hotch nodded and moved to press a button on the phone in the middle of the table, but the phone started ringing instead.
“Garcia?”
“I think i found our unsub; Chris Gevette, he filed for divorce after he gave evidence of spousal abuse but it seems like his wife had every piece of evidence that would be able to put him in jail rather than her so everything was blamed on him for the abuse and the jury ruled him unable to keep any stable relationship”
“Garcia do you have a work and home address?”
“Sent to your phones now; barber shop and home” the phone clicked off.
“(Y/n) i want you to go to the barber shop with Reid and Derek. Emily, J.J. and I will go to the house; Rossi stays here in case anything else happens.” and with that you all ran to the SUV’s.
-----
“CHRIS GEVETTE FBI!” Derek shouted through the door, your guns were drawn and ready for action as Derek kicked the door in. You moved swiftly through the shop, finding nothing but dust.
“Guys!” you were now out the back as your partners came running, “it's exactly like Sweeney Todd,” you motioned to the stairs in front of you before looking behind you, “there's stars that lead down as well; there may be bodies in there like the movie too, you go down there and i'll go up.”
“(Y/n) let me come with you,” that was Spencer, he looked genuinely concerned.
“I've got this Spence. Go” you started your ascent up the wooden stairs while trying to stay as quiet as you possibly could, “CHRIS GEVETTE,” you called out to the door once you got to it, you could hear the bustle of footsteps and made the split decision. The door was kicked in by you as you pointed your gun to Chris who was now holding a razor to a woman's neck.
“Get away!” Chris screamed, he was frantic; trembling and crying.
“Chris! Chris it's okay, i'm a good guy, okay?” you slowly let go of your gun, “im holstering my gun, okay?” you said as you're-holstered your gun, “Chris i know about the divorce-”
“No you dont!” Chris called, the woman under the razor trembled as the razor cut into her neck slightly.
“I do! Chris, I know you were abused! I know it wasn't you that did the abusing! If you let her go we can help you get custody and instead send that bitch to jail,” Chris looked almost relieved to hear that, he contemplated that for a moment before slowly letting the woman go. She ran over to you as Derek and Spencer finally came up the stairs and started handcuffing Chris.
“We’ve got two other bodies in the basement,” Spencer said to you while you held the trembling woman, “there's medic on the way now,” you nodded in affirmation before starting to help the women calm down and walk down the stairs.
------
The jet finally landed back at the bureau as the rest of your team started packing their things from their desks.
“Um (Y/n)” a voice called, you smiled as you looked up to see the person you least expected.
“Spence?” you questioned; your eyes darted around and couldn't see any other team member in sight, “everyone left already. Sorry. I've been in my own little world,” you gave a tight smile as you continued packing some extra files into your bag.
“It-it’s just me, but um, I just wanted to congratulate you on your break in the case,” the comment from Spencer's timid and small voice caught you off guard so much that you froze for a moment as you stared at him. It all seemed to go quiet, and slow; the clock on the wall seemed to tick at an atrociously slow pace.
Tick…
“(Y/n)?”
Tock…
“Hmm?”
“I uh, i was-”
“Oh, yeah um-”
Pause.
Quiet.
“Thank you,” smile.
Tick…
“I was...was wondering, (Y/n)...”
Tock…
“Yeah Spence?”
“Would you...would you like to go...on a date...with...me?”
Pause.
Quiet.
“With you?”
“Well, I did...I did say ‘me’ I hope- just, just forget it” and the world went back to normal as Spence started walking away.
“No Spence, wait!” you grabbed your things and quickly darted off after him; plunging your arm between the elevator doors and stepping in quickly before they shut behind you.
“Just forget it (Y/n); forget i ever asked and we can just go back to-”
“I would love to go on a date with you”
Tick…
“Really?”
“So long as you don't call me a paramecium again”
Tock…
“I won't; as long as you don't call me a substitute chemistry teacher”
Pause.
Quiet.
“I won't”
“Then it's settled.
Tick…
“Message me?”
“Of course”
Tock…
Smile.
#criminal minds#spencer reid#Derek morgan#penelopie garcia#Penelope Garcia#garcia#Emily prentiss#Aaron hotchner#David rossi#J.J.#Spencer reid x reader#Reid x reader#Spencer reid x gn!reader#Spencer reid x gender neutral reader#x reader
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Why did you close the door the last time you closed one? I last closed my bedroom door. We have to keep the bedrooms and the bathroom doors closed to keep our pup out. Stripes or polka dots? Polka dots. Do you care if people touch you when they’re talking to you? I don’t mind like a tap on the shoulder or arm. What is your gender? Female. Do you think that people think its obvious? Yes.
How long did your first date last? The duration of a movie and dinner. Is your favorite color within 10 feet of you? One of them is, yes. Highlight of your day? I had pizza for lunch. ha. Would you rather be on a boat or a plane? Plane. Can you tell when girls (or guys) have eyeliner on? Yeah? That’s an obvious thing. Can you cook? Nope. How high is your ceiling? I don’t know. Whats the worst job you can think of? Surgeon. I’m much to squeamish for that. I can’t handle the sight of blood or other bodily fluids. I can’t imagine cutting into a body or doing anything with organs. I just couldn’t do it, but I am so thankful that there are people who can! Do you swear a lot? No. Does the last person you texted have an O in their name? Yes. Her first name does, but also so does “mom.” ha. Is everything working in your house? Yeah. Would you rather have a pool or a trampoline? Pool. Does pop give you energy? No. TV show you love with a passion? I have a lot of favorites. Do you think you learned anything from the worst night of your life? Not sure what I would consider the “worst night of my life.”
Perfect age to get married? I don’t think there is a “perfect” age.
Is it safe to say you own over 20 pairs of shoes? No. Name a career path that women are known for taking. Nursing. Favorite type of cookie? Sugar and shortbread. A quality you look for in choosing a significant other? Sense of humor. What would I find if I looked in your pocket? No pockets. I don’t use them anyway. What was your first word? No idea. A musical instrument you wouldnt mind learning how to play? I would just like to get back into piano and really take it seriously and put in the practice. Last time you went to 7-eleven? It’s been awhile. I actually live really close to one, too. I missed free Slurpee day today, too. A fast food restaurant that you hate with a passion? I don’t like KFC at all. I’m not big on Wendy’s, but I can eat it. Does everyone in your family have a job? No. As far as my immediate family goes, I’m the only one who doesn’t. Going anywhere this weekend? No. Is your room ever clean? It’s always clean. I sometimes have unfolded clothes on my bed, but that’s it. What does it mean when youre being quiet? It can be anything or nothing. I’m just a quiet person. Last person you had a face to face conversation with? My dad. Wheres your phone? To the right of me. Do you know the difference between your and youre? You’re*, yes. How late did you stay up last night? I dozed off around 330ish, woke up again at like 5:45, fell asleep again around 6, and slept until almost 1. Anyone youre ready to kill? Um, NO. Do you need to get a tan? I could use a little tan, sure. What do you want? Good health. Favorite TV show as a kid? Barney when I was really little.
Whats a show that you absolutely refuse to watch? 2 Broke Girls and The Big Bang Theory. How many times have you been in love? Twice. Go camping or go to a party? Neither. Do you remember how old you were when you started swearing? The most I would say as a teenager was like “hella.” Haha. Yeah, real rebel over here. I didn’t really start to cuss until after high school, and it was only around friends. Now I don’t really cuss at all. I just never was a big cusser. How many years older than you would you date someone? Not sure, honestly. Not too much older. What was the last thing you pinky swore on? With my doctor that I would do something I’m supposed to be doing. Would you consider yourself a nice person? I think so. Are there a lot of mirrors in your house? No. Has there ever been a serial killer in your house? Uh, no.
Do you know anyone who looks like Adam Sandler? No. True or false: Glee is annoying. I didn’t watch it. Last thing you cooked? I warmed up something in the microwave. That’s about the extent of “cooking” for me. lol. Do you use slang often? I don’t know if I’d say often. Maybe I don’t notice. Wear glasses? Yes.
About how old was the last person that hit on you? I don’t recall the last time I was hit on. What color are your headphones? Pink and white. Would you make a good teacher? Why? No. Dont you hate those commercials that try too hard? So all commercials? Is the fan on? Yes, of course. Any special reason why youre taking this survey? Nope. There’s aren’t any special reasons why I take a survey lol. I just do them. What does the last text message you sent say? “Pizza.”
Your friend needs you to run to the store to get a pregnancy test. Do you? Sure. Do you log out on facebook when you leave the site? No. That would be annoying to have to sign in every time. It’s my laptop, so I don’t have any reason to log out of anything. What color are your underwear? Black. How short are your nails? Short. Basically not there. Do you like the opposite sex to be dominant or you the one in control? I like them to be dominant. Favorite holiday? Christmas. If I asked you to point to Ohio on a map of the US do you think you could? Yes. Youre locked in a room with spiders. Do you have an issue? UM YEAH I HAVE A HUGE ISSUE WITH THAT. Do you wear your most expensive item of clothing often? No. Do you eat a lot of food? Not like I used to.
Have your parents ever tried to control your relationship? No. Have you ever had to give someone directions before? Yeah, well more like attempted. I’m the worst person to give directions. Don’t ask me. Speaking of which, are you good at understanding driving directions? I don’t drive. How many people do you text daily? I don’t text daily, and if I do text it’s either with one of my parents or my brother. Do you play any instruments? Which instruments do you play? No. Is there anyone who you call by their last name? No. What did you do on your last birthday? Dinner, cake, and presents with my family on my actual birthday and then we went out to eat at my favorite restaurant the next night with my older brother and his boyfriend. Which of the Seven Deadly Sins do you commit the most? Envy. Has anyone ever told you that you’re incapable of whispering? No. What is your least favorite subject in school? Math. Have you ever been involved in a custody battle before? No. Do you know a couple who constantly sucks on each other’s face? No. When was the last time you watched a YouTube video? Yesterday. Have you ever babysat a newborn baby before? No. When was the last time you held someone’s hand? I held my dog’s hand earlier. ha. How many meals have you eaten today, so far? One. I’m about to eat dinner, though. Do you think it’s stupid for people to call others “hot?” No... Do you personally think Wikipedia is a reliable source? I check it for some things, mostly regarding celebrities. Have you ever shopped at Wet Seal before? Did you like it? I have. It was okay. Do you care about spending money if it’s someone else’s money? Yes. What is your favorite Disney movie of all time? Alice in Wonderland. When you were a child, did you ever want to become a wizard/witch? No. Would you rather have hardwood floors or carpet? Hardwood floors except for the bedrooms, in which I would want carpet. Who was the last person you yelled at? Why? My brother. As a kid, did you ever go to camp? It was a thing where I live for the 6th grade class to go to science camp, so I did that. I also went to a Girl Scout camp thing. Have you ever made out in a movie theater before? No. Are you currently trying to learn to play any instrument? No. When was the last time you went somewhere you thought was haunted? Never. Who was the last person to compliment you? *shrug* How old were you when you got to go on your first date? Twenty-two. Would you call your parents over-protective or under-protective? Over protective. Did your parents ever let you play in the pits of those multicolored balls? Yeah. Have any of your siblings ever had a crush on your significant other? No. Are you the jealous type? I can be. When was the last time you felt like you were high on life? Never. Do you know someone who cares about themselves more than their child? No. Do you still watch cartoons on television? I sometimes watch Rugrats, Doug, and Hey Arnold. What do you usually order at Taco Bell, if you go there? Bean burrito, no onions, extra sauce. Is there anyone currently annoying you? Nope. Do you have freckles? Yes. How many dogs do you have, if any at all? One. Have you ever witnessed someone being beaten up? No. Do you think biting is weird or sexy? It can be both, depending on the situation. Would you rather be called hot or beautiful? Beautiful. Have you ever had a pet turtle before? No. Do you still sleep with your parents when you’re scared sometimes? lol it’d be a little weird if I, a twenty-seven year old, did that. Have you ever met someone with two different color eyes? No. Have you ever felt like someone was following you? Yes. What color shirt are you wearing at the moment? Black. Do you enjoy going school shopping? That was the only thing I looked forward to when I was in school. haha. Do you think Pug dogs are adorable or just plain ugly? That reminds me of that creepy Mountain Dew commercial with the pug and it has like baby doll legs instead of its real legs and it goes around saying, “Puppy monkey baby.” It’s so weird! Have you ever met someone who completely resembled their pet? No. I’ve seen pictures of people who resemble a dog, though. What was the worst substance you’ve spilled on yourself before? Hot coffee and hot food. Have you ever made out with more than one person in one night? No. Do you think there is a soulmate out there for everyone? I’m not sure. I don’t think there is for me.
Do you like short or long surveys the best? Long. Have you ever bought fake money and tried to make it pass for real? No. Are your siblings nice the majority of the time? Yes. Do you freak out when a thunderstorm comes along? I do, but I also love them? How often do you shower? Every other day. Have you ever had to sell something for a school fundraiser? Yeah. How many sodas do you usually drink in one day? One. Have you ever met someone who was completely weird all-around? lol :X Do you ever watch any soap operas? No. They’re just so cheesy and over the top. Also, in my opinion, the acting isn’t good at all. Have you ever met someone who was mean to everyone? Yes. Do you usually have a low tolerance for pain or high tolerance? Low. Would you rather eat or sleep? Sleep. Are you one of those die hard Twilight or Harry Potter fans? I was at one point.
Do your parents ever force you to talk to your grandparents? No. They wouldn’t have to, I was close with my maternal grandparents when they were alive and I’m close with my paternal grandma, so. I like to talk to them on my own. Do you think long surveys are boring or entertaining? They can be either, it depends on my mood. <<< Same. Sometimes I just get annoyed. Have you ever learned that someone had lied to you all along? Yeppp. Have you ever wanted to be a lawyer? No. Have you ever had to bail someone out of jail before? No. Is there anyone in your immediate family who was adopted? No. Do you know anyone who doesn’t have any common sense? I’ve known people who seemed to lack in that department. When was the last time you bought something? Today. Do you think you look anything like your parents? A little. What are your plans for this weekend? Nothing. What color is your significant other’s hair? I’m single. Have you ever applied for a job at Walmart before? No. Would you ever become a foster parent? I don’t know if I’ll ever become a parent at all. Are you ashamed of anyone in your family? No. The only person I’m ashamed of is me. Would rather talk to someone on a landline or a cell phone? I don’t like talking on the phone regardless. Has anyone ever given you a psychiatric assessment? Yes. What is your favorite amusement park? Disneyland. Did you ever have braces? Yes, but not for my teeth. What is cuter: kisses on the forehead of the cheek? Forehead. Do you believe in evolution or creation? Creation. Would you rather take a bath or a shower? Why or why not? Shower. Does it bother you when people touch your personal items? Depends what it is. When was the last time you did something sexual? Never. Do you collect anything? What? Giraffe stuff. Are you better at hand-drawing things or painting? I’m horrible at drawing. I don’t have any creative or artistic talent. Have either of your parents ever called you a failure before? No. They would never. I call myself one, though. Have you ever suspected someone of cheating on you? No. When you get married, will you convert your last name? That’s a “if” not a “when”, but I like my last name so I think I’d hyphenate. Are your parents divorced, married or separated? Married. Has someone ever left a relationship with you for someone else? No. What’s the most painful thing you’ve ever experienced? Losing my grandparents and my dog, Brandie. When was the last time you went shoe shopping? It’s been a long time. My last new pair of shoes was a Christmas present. Are you a part of any clubs at your school, if you still go to school? No longer in school. Do you know someone who wears a wig? No. What is your best friend’s last name? Mom. ha. When was the last time you cried? For what reason? A couple days ago. Just life and frustration. What is your favorite shop to go to at the mall? I like to check out a few different ones. What time do you usually go to bed on the weekends? I go to bed around 4/430 everyday. Weekends and weekdays don’t make any difference to me. Have you ever considered suicide? Yes. Have you ever been raped before? No. Would you ever consider becoming a marine biologist? No. Did you carry a lunchbox as a child? Yes. What is your favorite ‘sweet’ to eat? Donuts or cupcakes. Are you someone who usually eats when you’re bored? Yeah. Have you ever eaten your way through a breakup? No. Who was the last person you texted? My mom. Do you usually buy popcorn when you eat at the movie theater? Yeah. Did you sleep alone or with someone last night? Alone. I always do. What kind of dressing do you eat on your salad, if any? Ranch. Are you someone who constantly likes to wear hats? No. Have you ever seen a Lifetime movie that relates to your life? Yes. What is your Myspace URL? Oh Myspace. Are you someone who likes to wear dresses more than pants? No. Have you ever dated someone who was way overprotective of you? No. What was the last thing you touched besides your keyboard? My phone. When was the last time you witnessed a fist fight? *shrug* Do you know anyone who lives in the state of California? Me and most of my family.
Are you waiting for a text right now? Nope. Is it your summer vacation right now? I’m not in school, but it’s summertime, yes. Do you like traveling? I do. What color are the walls of the room you’re in right now? White. Do you still make mix cds? No. Are you eating or drinking anything right now? Coke.
Do you go to church regularly? No. :/ Who’s your best friend? My mom. Are you determined? No. I used to be.
Are you always looking for/in a relationship, or do you like being single? Neither. Ever had your heart broken? Yes. Even broken someone else’s heart? Yes. :/ Are you confident? No. When’s the last time you smiled? Today. Are you tan? No.
Any big plans for today/tonight? No. What’s the background on your computer? Alexander Skarsgård with his arms around a Husky and a German Shepherd. It’s very cute. Do you have days where you just want to listen to sad songs? Yes. Don’t you hate when your plans fall through? I used to, but now I kinda hope for it. Ever maxed out a credit card? No. How old are you? Twenty-seven. Who’s the last person you kissed? Joseph. Are you hoping they will also be the next person you kiss? No. Do you ever actually go on dates? Nope.
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