#anyways rant over u_u
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whenever I think about what it would be like if yoichi joined afo, I always end up with the same concept where he eventually caves in after a couple years in the Torture Cube that is the vault (whether he's able to pass on ofa before all that is up for debate) and like. yeah he'll do villian things and murder people but afo generally likes to give him easy, insignificant jobs that any semi competent person can do. so he usually doesn't get to do any real action and is mostly relegated to making sure one of afo's many money laundering businesses are running okay or whatever kind of white collar crime afo has going on. so he constantly feels belittled, sheltered, devoid of purpose, etc., and the vault didn't even completely kill off his morals so there's just this constant pervading sense of guilt with everything he does. no matter what, there's always this nagging sensation of defeat and shame at every waking moment. but he can't even rebel bc at this point he's so afraid of going back to the vault that he'll do anything to stay out, so he's stuck living an intensely miserable life while trapped with his brother lol
#putting yoichi in a villian timeline is like putting him in a pressure cooker until he explodes#also i know you can easily solve all these problems by making him actually like crime#but i prefer yoichi always opposing afo no matter what kind of au#like the most appealing thing about afo and ofa is that even though they were born to be together they were also born to always be seperate#so even in a universe were afo technically breaks his brother#hes not completely broken#its just so fundemental to yoichis character that a part of him will always be in opposition to him#anyways rant over u_u#moria.txt
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#out of blades#ignore this lol#unrelated to anything lol but man.#i wish i knew how to speak up more during d&d cause nothing my character says or does really matters lol#like it's my fault but it still makes me sad jfdkjdfk my character could be totally absent#and i think it wouldnt matter even tho he has a twin brother ;_;#so i kinda just wind up going anywhere that he might be needed in combat...#which makes me sad cause i love rp (obviously!!)#but i dont know how to speak up before anyone else says something nowdays apparently#and it seems like when my character does anything it gets kinda shot down or dismissed so :3 it's fun!!#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAghhh#anyway rant over LOL i cant wait til it's over for the night cause i'm not feelin it u_u#but better to do so here so nobody i play with will see jsdjdfjj
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To the person that sent me an ask for the kiss meme, I am working on it !!
Works just being a pain in the ass and decided to give me all the extra shifts ever so writing is extra slow <3
#i can't say the name of where i work because we have really strict policies#like we cannot slag it off at all or anything some guy on TikTok got in trouble for making videos about the place#not even recording in the shop just in general#so lets just say I work for Jojamart and they decided 9-10 hours on till is fun and not exhausting at all#and that because i am a 15 minutes walk away i can just come in whenever u_u#ANYWAY RANT OVER BACK TO WRITING <3
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We still don't know what's going on with my stomach but I'm being cycled to 2 different medications as a trial to manage symptoms until I can get to a gastroenterologist
Medical diet is over ☺️ gonna clean out my sections of the fridge and pantry for the upcoming new year now that I can eat all the food there again 💕
#we're considering bacterial overgrowth which i wont deny - a lot of that matches up with my experiences#it's just. these issues suck so immensely bc everyone wants to holistically cure them through clean eating or w/e#no more diets!!!!! I'm only 110!!! my weight is still dropping and I'm not doing anything to make it happen U_U#it was 114 then 112 and now 110... gonna have to just seek out more calorically dense food i suppose#I'm just. not hungry and i lose my appetite pretty quickly and i think it may have gotten worse over time?? anyways#hoatm rants#🖤chronic illness tag🤍
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So I just found collierastro on youtube 2 days ago, she does super-approachable science communication videos centered on scifi and pop-science(her video on The Practical Problems With Silicon-Based Life is really good), and today I've been working through her video on How String Theory Made SciCom More Difficult, and I think it's a really good example of what I'm always saying about Math not being something ppl find IN nature, but rather something people invented and project ONTO nature.
It's not really the point of her essay, tho I think if you watch it with this in mind you'll prob see how her arguments support that thesis, but the tl;dr on it is this: String Theory works GREAT as math, but 1)you can't really test it with practical experimentation, and 2)while it CAN provide mathematical proofs for lots of stuff in physics, it can only do so for stuff you already have other proofs for, so even that's of limited utility. Related to all this she also touches on, in passing, that the quest for a "unified theory of everything" is really more of an aesthetic obsession with "mathematical elegance" than something the actual science actually suggests.
So here you have a theory that makes perfect sense and is super-elegant IN THE MATH, but which in 100years has produced no experimental verification, has produced hardly ANY practical experiments to test it in the first place, and which may not even BE falsifiable since its "proofs" would all be generated in other, non-observable dimensions anyway. It's literally something that "the math" says should exist, but doesn't, because reality isn't math.
ok, anyway: rant over u_u
#collierastro#Physics#String Theory#Experiments#Pareidolia#zA Writes#zA Opinions#Science#Video Essays#Math
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I think you could ask her sources? Because I know that chatgpt makes up its sources (I had tried back when I thought that it was just a glorified search engine,,,,,)
honestly i'm not totally against the use of chatgpt as a glorified search engine, it can at least get you started somewhere as long as you look at it critically and never blindly trust it! but the fact that she asked it to write her whole part and just copied and pasted it after she made it seem like she worked SO HARD on it... girl... like i know how she writes and she sure as hell doesn't write like that! like I'm talking someone who forgets to write complete sentences so i have to Frankenstein something out of the disjointed stuff she sends me to proofread. I'm just gonna tell her sis I didn't keep anything from your part because we'd have gotten a zero for plagiarism, I don't even feel like being nice about it at this point u_u cuz that's especially egregious since we're political science majors and our paper has a strong anticolonial approach to climate justice and her part is just like "and so COP28 is approaching and it's cool because it's hosted in the UAE" GIRL WHAT?? anyways rant over I'm going back to the paper and try to make sense of it :( thanks for ur message
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[FF DarkDon/DarkRaph - I know we gave them actual names but i thought it would be easier just to label them as this when sending asks u_u]
“Are you finally ready to talk? Or are you going to keep throwing temper tantrums?”
| muse interactions
Raffaello was making good use of the large claws on his hands as he kept punching them repeatedly over and over into the nearest wall. Claw puncturing through old sheet metal as he continued to do so. Discarded around his legs were the remains of anything else he could have gotten his hands on at the time. Not but a mess of fabric scraps, wood, metal, cardboard and even some rock. Anything Raffaello could just get his hands on to smash and break apart was what he sought out in the moment. Anything he could hit anything that continued the burning string pain in his knuckles. His breath grew ragged as his motions were slowing down little by little. Another run in with their clones went about how it always seemed to go. Even if they were meant to be better than those weak and scrawny turtles. Then why was it they always handed their asses to them!
He growled and lifted his arms up high above his head before slamming them down fast into the sheet of metal he had decided to make into his current punching bag. Wishing it was that damn Raphael. The one he was cloned from himself.
Hand came down he could feel how the edge of the claws seemed to just about near sink into the the thin metal sheet. A swift motion providing a loud screeching sound. They he could feel down to his teeth. Growling hating how high pitched the screech was against his scales. Grinding his teeth as he continued to push through the metal wanting the slice to go all the way through but at some point there was resistance as the momentum he worked up in the head of the action became slow. Leaving him slightly stuck in the metal surrounding his claws. He tries to tug free only to be met with some resistance. Huffing as he tries once again. Blaming it on how tried he had grown for why he could just pry himself free of the metal sheet wall.
“Are you finally ready to talk? Or are you going to keep throwing temper tantrums?”
"NO 'm not in fact I 'hink I can thrown even more!" Raffa yells, snapping back towards Nic when he shouts. Seeming to give him enough of a second wind as he could feel the vines pulsate under his skin how muscles tighten and flexed. He roared out and pulled and pulled till the sections of the wall came clean out of its place. Even that wasn't enough to fully free him only allowing one hand to slip free as the other was weighed down to the floor. "See!" he pants out between labored breaths
Clearly making some points, but Niccolo didn't seem all to impressed by his brothers response or actions. Least Raffaello hadn't gone and decided to take his anger out on their creations. He just wanted to blow off the steam but being bothered in the very much needed moment of peace was just adding on fuel to his emotional out lash. Along with being made to feel and look stupid since his claw was still stuck in the part of the wall he was abusing in that time.
"Whaja want anyway Dork Don?!" Raffa says, falling back onto the lashing out as he tries to figure out how to unstick himself. Just getting himself to growl as he looks down to his trapped hand right now. " 'm tried of those stupid turtles!" He contuines to rant on over. "And 'his junky dump!" He decides the only method is to smash the metal to the ground in hopes to knock it off free somehow. "So no I can throw all the damn tantrums I want dork Donatello!" Bwcausw apperntly this was the best way to insult Nicollo not using the name theu had picked for themself. But instead bring up the one they were more often called by thier maker, and Daruis. Just wanting to throw put a sort of punch there way.
"He'll ill go in an' mess wit' ya shit too! So leave me alone less 'hat what you want!" He contuines finally slamming his hand in to the ground hand enough. But not getting the result he wished as he found the claw of his hand not stuck in the floor another annoyed growl just leaveing him as he tries harder and harder to pull himself free.
"If ya gonna stand there and gawk least get me outta 'his! Or leave!" Though admitted he kind of hopes Nicollo will take pity on his stupid ass and help him free himself from his mistake.
#muse| raffaello#madamkezzie#aflockoffeathers#[ A couple of rotten eggs - aflockoffeathers]#muse interaction#[ fast forward verse]#ic reply#stay queued#((so i keep all my tags on ever note just in case and when doing these two I put Nic as Dork Don and now were here XDDD))#((also i was reading his wiki and hes the stupid one of the group and fucking can not xD))
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In a potential quarantine scenario: Ayane: I never liked going to school Shirogane: mhm Ayane: so I’m glad school is closed Shirogane: mhm Ayane: but I wish we could go out Shirogane: mhm Ayane: or maybe do something fun Shirogane: mhm Ayane: ... Ayane: I also wish I wasn’t in lockdown with you, you’re so boring Shirogane: hey, you take that back right now
#// tldr: the satsukis are generally terribly boring people to be in lock down with#shitpost#// anyway i hate this i can't wait for this whole thing to blow over#// i just want to give my floopin exam but it keeps getting delayed and its just#// really frustrating and annoying for me#// rant over u_u
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Quackity and Schlatt’s Relationship - More Complicated Then You Think
(this is all /rp and about the characters from the dream smp! pls assume i have the dignity not to write analysis of youtubers)
recently there was a bit of discourse surrounding the relationship between Quackity and Schlatt floating around on tumblr. tho i never saw the original post that sparked the conversation, i did see a few posts that were inspired by it mentioning how they disliked that the original post implied that Quackity and Schlatt were mutually abusive and/or equally bad for each other
since i never saw the original post, i can't be sure if that's what the op meant to imply. it's not really my place to speak about a post that i never got the chance to read. BUT the conversation that was caused by the post in question did get me thinking about how this fandom treats the relationship between Quackity and Schlatt and how little nuance there is in discussions about it
now before i say anything else, i want to make a few things clear:
i don't think Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship is mutually abusive. no need to worry about hearing that from this post
i don't look down on ppl who have different interpretations of their relationship
there will be potentially triggering content in this analysis. i will place a quick warning whenever i think one is needed!
their relationship is romantic in canon and therefore i’ll be treating it as romantic
alright now that we’ve gotten all of that out of the way, we can finally get on with the analysis! i apologize for how long this is gonna be
part 1: let's talk relationship!
i think we can all agree that Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship was not exactly a healthy one. tho it didn't start out that way, it certainly turned into what could be read as abusive or toxic (i personally read their relationship as being abusive in its later half due to evidence provided by the text, but i understand if others prefer to view it as just toxic instead)
but what happened that led to their partnership ending so badly? what caused all of this mess?
well, it was a lot of things. but we will get to that later. let's talk relationship first!
from the very beginning, Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship was pretty one-sided. tho they both clearly liked each other as friends/partners in crime both before and after the election (yes they did interact before the election!) Quackity was also interested in Schlatt romantically- something that Schlatt wasn't fully committed to
as we all know from the infamous date stream and from a few other moments, Quackity and Schlatt enjoyed playfully flirting with each other- tho it was pretty obvious that Quackity was more serious about it then Schlatt was even tho Schlatt considered Quackity to be very attractive
in my opinion, Quackity is someone who wants a long term relationship, while Schlatt is more interested in flings. this can be seen in Schlatt refusing to marry Quackity and rejecting most of his advances while Quackity tried his best to convince him to feel otherwise. Tommy put it best: Quackity is just one of Schlatt’s many bitches U_U
to Quackity, the romantic aspect of their relationship was very important. because Schlatt never actually shot him down or told him that he didn't feel the same way, Quackity took that to mean that they were truly in love. Schlatt on the other hand wasn't very invested in the romantic side of things but clearly valued Quackity’s looks and his support as an ally against Pogtopia so he never fully rejected Quackity’s advances
this might not seem like too big of a deal considering the other things that happened between them, but i think it shows part of the nature of their relationship. there is a lot of miscommunication and, on Schlatt’s end, manipulation of emotions. love is a strong motivator for loyalty and Schlatt is a smart guy who would know how to use that to his advantage
but that isn't to say that Schlatt didn't ever care about Quackity!
Schlatt is a complicated guy and figuring out when he's actually being genuine can be pretty difficult. but i think there are some moments that point to Schlatt genuinely caring about Quackity
when he was alive, Schlatt was pretty paranoid. not as paranoid as Wilbur, but certainly up there. but there were never any times where he truly questioned Quackity’s loyalties after his first day as president. Schlatt also seemed truly upset that Quackity betrayed him, bringing up their status as partners in crime while ranting about how much it hurt him and singling Quackity out while talking about how he had been abandoned during his time of need
Schlatt also spent a lot of time sulking after Quackity betrayed him and whining to Ponk about needing a new bitch. this is in contrast to how angry he was after Tubbo betrayed him- both during and after the execution
there is also the situation with the Big Man Gym
after being dead for a while, Schlatt contacted Quackity despite them leaving off on bad terms and asked for him to visit him in his cave gym. when Quackity showed up, Schlatt talked about how he valued their relationship and the good times they had together. tho this can easily be seen as emotional manipulation, Schlatt’s a lot smarter than he seems and- if he doesnt have memory issues due to being a ghost- would know that Quackity’s opinion of him was in the dump at the time of his death and most likely wouldn't have improved since then. Fundy has a higher opinion of Schlatt than Quackity does and is someone who obviously craves validation. but Schlatt went to Quackity first anyway and trusted him to help revive him
i think that this is all good evidence that points towards Schlatt truly caring about Quackity as much as someone like Schlatt can care about anyone- or at least valuing him as a companion
i also think that it is pretty common knowledge that Quackity cared about Schlatt- and possibly still does- but i will go over a bit of evidence that i haven’t already mentioned before we move on to the next part
Quackity tried multiple times to impress Schlatt (like when he lied about knowing how to play chess), would attempt to help Schlatt when he was drowning in water, sadly said that they could have had something together while Schlatt was dying in the caravan, and implied that he wouldn’t have left if Schlatt hadn’t taken down the white house. Quackity also willingly went to the Big Man Gym after being summoned there by Schlatt and wanted to revive him long before the revive book became part of the story
part 2: what made it fall apart?
everything i've said so far has been pretty interesting (hopefully) but it doesn't really answer the original question: what went wrong to turn Schlatt and Quackity’s mainly positive partnership sour?
well it comes down to two things in my opinion: their incompatible desires for political power and Schlatt’s deteriorating mental state
Quackity wanted political power from the beginning and wasn't afraid to be open about his desires. he pooled his votes with Schlatt because Schlatt offered him the position of vice president, something Wilbur and Tommy weren’t willing to give to him. tho Quackity obviously cared about L’Manburg and wanted to see good things for it, he also desired power and was willing to team up with someone he didn't fully agree with to get said power
at 32:40 in this video, Quackity talks about how in politics everyone uses everyone so it's alright if Schlatt is using him. he then talks about how he doesn't want to be a man with no power and how he understands that Schlatt’s main goal is also gaining/keeping power. Quackity also shows a bit of his naughty evil side by saying if he overthrows Schlatt then the fun ends too early!
(side note: these two are pretty evenly matched in intelligence and manipulativeness, i love it!)
it's a bit of a fandom misconception that Quackity was a love sick yes man during the Manburg era. tho Quackity did want to please Schlatt and was in love with him, he didn't shy away from standing up to or disagreeing with Schlatt when he believed it was needed
at around 26:12 of this video, Quackity and Schlatt meet together in private and Quackity tells Schlatt off for playing down his role in the power structure of Manburg. since this was very early in Schlatt’s reign, Quackity shows no fear towards him and confidently tells him not to treat him like that
Quackity also broke Niki out of jail after regretting letting her be put there in the first place, tried to convince Schlatt to not execute Tubbo, jumped in front of Fundy when Schlatt tried to attack him, tried to stop Schlatt from tearing down buildings, and attempted to protect the white house he built from being destroyed by Schlatt. these are not behaviors of a pure yes man but of someone who, despite fear, has the confidence to speak up for himself even when disrespected by someone in authority
Quackity has always been someone who wanted power and someone who was never a yes man to authority. this contradicts with how Schlatt believed Quackity should act as vice president. in Schlatt’s opinion, Quackity’s one job is to sit around looking pretty while Schlatt does all of the important things and holds all of the power. Schlatt was a big fan of promoting people to worthless positions of authority and its pretty obvious that he considered vice president to be similar to the fake positions he gave Fundy and Tubbo
in the end, this was a big part of what destroyed their relationship. like it or not, Quackity’s a power hungry guy and always has been. he didn't like that Schlatt constantly shoved him aside and refused to listen to him
now onto the nasty bit...Schlatt’s mental state
cw for mentions of alcoholism, mental deterioration, and abusive behavior
before i say anything more, i just want to say that i don't think having issues with alcoholism makes someone a bad person. i personally have some issues with such things so it would be pretty stupid of me to say being an alcoholic makes you a bad person. alcoholism does negatively affect your cognitive functions tho and, combined with other health issues, can cause some of the very serious mental problems that Schlatt clearly struggles with
throughout the Manburg era, Schlatt’s mental state rapidly deteriorated. he went from a pretty normal- if eccentric- guy who had a drinking problem, to someone who was delirious most of the time. it's a sharp and noticeable decline that caused a lot of pain for Quackity due to Schlatt often taking his excess aggression out on him by yelling at him and/or belittling him. tho Schlatt often belittled Quackity before he went fully off of the deep end, it was never as aggressive as it was when he was in this delirious state of mind
it was during one of Schlatt’s most aggressive and delirious moments that he tore down the white house despite Quackity’s protests. as we all know, this caused Quackity to snap and kill Schlatt (it's more complicated than that but we will get back to that). as mentioned previously, Quackity implied that he would have stayed with Schlatt if the white house hadn’t been destroyed
in my opinion, these two things combined are the biggest reasons why Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship fell apart. their differing desires for power were not compatible and Schlatt’s awful behavior while his mental state declined caused a rift between them that couldn't be fixed
part 3: how toxic was it really?
cw for emotional and physical abuse
as i said all the way back in part one, Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship was not healthy. i have provided many examples in the other two parts that shine a light onto why it wasn't healthy, but i didn't show the entire picture
there are many moments that show exactly how Schlatt treated Quackity when he was acting at his worst and none of them are pretty. tho Schlatt was never truly aggressive with his insults until he started to go off of the deep end, that doesn't mean that what he said wasn't negatively affecting Quackity
Schlatt would belittle, insult, and mock Quackity for his appearance not being up to his standards, for his opinions, and for being emotional in ways that Schlatt disapproved of like crying. tho Schlatt would often brush off Quackity’s reactions towards this cruel behavior, it's very clear that Schlatt’s treatment of him has stuck with Quackity in many ways
Quackity is very sensitive about his appearance and it seems to be because of how badly Schlatt hurt his self esteem during their time together. Schlatt tied Quackity’s worth to his appearance and then would claim he wasn't meeting his standards of attractiveness. we can tell that this has stuck with Quackity because of his sensitivity towards people bringing up the scar on his face (something that greatly alters his physical appearance) and he still reacts very badly when Schlatt calls him the mocking nickname flatty patty
speaking of flatty patty- that stupid insult shockingly has a lot of weight in Quackity’s relationship with Schlatt. tho its something the audience is meant to laugh at, the nickname also shows just how little Schlatt respects Quackity because he's constantly throwing it around just to make Quackity upset. Schlatt’s last words are flatty patty all because he wanted to get in one last dig at his ex and ruin Quackity’s day even further
Schlatt tends to do a lot of things that are intended to make Quackity upset. tearing down the room Quackity made for him in the white house is the biggest example of this- especially since Schlatt mentions how it will upset Quackity while he does it. you can see this moment at around 19:10 of this video
and now let's get into the elephant in the room when it comes to these two: Quackity was scared of Schlatt. tho we never really see Schlatt hit or attack Quackity physically outside of their confrontation at the white house or their confrontation in the caravan, these clips imply that Quackity was at the very least scared of Schlatt physically harming him in some way
as for actually physically harming him, Schlatt hits Quackity multiple times with a pickaxe and with his fists during their white house fight. Quackity hits Schlatt a couple times too, tho these are all primarily defensive blows since he is trying to protect himself and his property. he also chases after Quackity with a bow after Quackity’s plan to trick him into signing Manburg over to the Pogtopians fails and hits him multiple times during the caravan confrontation
all of this evidence shows that Schlatt was an abusive (or at least toxic) partner towards Quackity and someone who greatly affected him in many ways
tho Quackity did a few questionable things throughout his relationship with Schlatt (such as trying to get Schlatt to have sex with him despite Schlatt not being interested as shown in the later half of this video) and did some downright morally wrong things during his time as vice president of Manburg, no one deserves the pain of an abusive relationship- even a person who has done bad things
as a brief side note before we move on because i know people will bring it up if i skip over it, Quackity did- and most likely still does- want to literally possess Glatt. he brought up reviving Schlatt and using him as a political pawn after Schlatt’s funeral and during their conversation at the Big Man Gym Quackity talked about owning Glatt and having him work at Las Nevadas with no pay
this is unsettling behavior to say the least but this essay isnt about the aftermath of their relationship so much as it is about their relationship when it was actually happening. maybe i will make another post talking more about how Quackity’s relationship with Schlatt affected him even after Schlatt’s death and/or about Quackity’s relationship with Glatt
part 4: final thoughts
i’m not exactly sure why the nuances in Schlatt and Quackity’s relationship get lost when it comes to the fandom, but it’s pretty disappointing to see. hopefully this essay can help people take a closer look at canon and maybe even help them find something interesting that they’d want to explore!
tho the point of this essay is to clear up any misconceptions and hopefully add some nuance to the conversations surrounding Schlatt and Quackity’s relationship, i also wrote it in hopes of showing people how fascinating these two partners in crime were back in the Manburg days. i didn’t cover everything but i think i did a pretty good job for my first analysis post in the dsmp fandom
also since you read to the end, i must say thank you! it really does means a lot to me that you did. i hope you enjoyed and maybe even learned something. this post can be used as a resource if anyone wants to use it as such
here’s a tiny devil Quackity for your troubles <3
#quackity#jschlatt#manburg#dream smp analysis#dsmp analysis#posts by me#this was really fun to make!! i worry it wont show up in tags tho bc of how many links there are in it#so pls reblog!! if you read it and liked it that is haha#meta by me
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Check In Tag
Thanks @ktarsims for tagging me here!
I’m still not dead--luckily, I’m in the home stretch; just two more weeks and the semester’s done! I just have about a zillion papers and exams to get through, FML, LOL.
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Why did you choose your URL?
Cuz all I could think of was my frikkin name, like a baby idiot with no creativity.
How long have you been on tumblr?
Too effing long. 2023 will make 10 whole years, good grief.
Do you have a queue tag?
No, but I queue up everything anyways.
Why did you start your blog in the first place?
Cuz TSR was making me mad, and I liked the simblrs that were already here, and figured this was a great way to have some autonomy over how I simmed and shared content, without the peanut gallery yelling at me every stinking time I tried to upload something.
Why did you choose your icon/pfp?
It was part of a dumb silly little story I made for TSR back when Dragon Valley first came out, about how the gods blessed Sakura with a baby dragon. I reuploaded it on my simblr for the lulz. Don’t take it seriously, trust me, LOL.
Why did you choose your header?
It's from the same style of header/border I used way back in my TSR days.
What’s your post with the most notes?
My TS4 Rant - Still Unimpressed rant from back in 2015, jfc. It’s been HOW LONG since this wack AF mobile game in disguise was released? I can’t.
How many mutuals do you have?
How do we even tell anymore?
How many followers do you have?
A lot.
How many people do you follow?
Plenty. And I lurk even more.
Have you ever made a shitpost?
Sadly no; I’m not clever enough. U_U
How often do you use tumblr every day?
Barely at all lately; this new grad school I’m in is effing annoying; their numbers are woefully low, especially after the pandemic, so they’ve got me doing way too much work on crap that I don’t even specialize in; it’s really starting to tick me off. I didn’t come here for this crap.
Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?
I have stepped on soooooo many TS4 simmers’ toes, it’s hilarious. I’ve had EA sycophants and paywall apologists cuss me out in my PMs, IMs, reblogs, etc. I don’t engage--I post my rants for posterity, not to hash crap out with people. My beef is with EA directly.
How do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?
My blog my rules. I reblog what i want, and post what I want, when I want.
Do you like tag games?
I lovelovelove questionnaires and games. I avoid tagging, because I’m always afraid I’ll leave someone out, and I don’t want people to think I don’t like them.
Do you like ask memes?
I don’t even wait around for people to send the asks--I always just answer all of them at once, LOL.
Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
Tumblr famous and Simblr famous are 2 different things. I've had quite a few Simblr famous mutuals, but what even is being Tumblr famous anymore? O_o
Do you have a crush on a mutual?
No, but I am deeply in love with several simblrs’ art styles and gameplay aesthetics, in TS2, 3 AND 4. Pure chef’s kiss. So inspirational; I wish I had more time to sim, and try new things!
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Thanks for reading!
I tag anyone; y’all know I can’t do this, pfft!
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i havent been here in a hot second is there a reason for the makoto hate specifically? like the rants go back to p5's writing issues but the spite for makoto seems very specific did she kill someones dog in one of the spinoffs or what?
You're all good. So here's the thing, she did kill my dog-I'm joking.
When I say “I’m the residential #1 Makoto Hater” it’s a joke, partially cause it probs looks that way (and probs cause it might be true, who knows if you could quantify hate then maybe I’m at the top of the leaderboards 8U but you can’t so we’ll never know). But I’m saying it at as a joke, to own myself and everyone here that knows what I think of her, rather than wear it as a badge of honor or some silliness. It’s just a “oh haha yeah there goes Silly, dunking on Makoto again! She’s basically Makoto’s #1 hater haha oh she’s so silly.” (so please don’t look too deep into it, I just want to have fun).
Anyway, me hating Makoto isn’t new, but I do hold a similar ire towards Futaba, Goro (tho I have camaraderie with his fans, I relate to their struggle in terms of my own brown hair and red eye fav and Atlus screwing them over u_u I may hate your fave but I respect you and will be in your corner), and Yukari (as well as Chloe from LiS if you want a non-Persona example). Makoto might be talked about more because 1) She hits my buttons that much faster (Futaba/Goro are more like a festering wound, and when I talk about them it’s hard to pick a starting point), 2) Her fans tendency (early on in the fandom) bringing her up frequently.....was a bad combo with #1 (overexposure+pushing all my buttons really fast=disaster). Obvie not blaming her fans, but it was hard to curate how I was able to curate my content online (esp with gaming news websites calling her “best girl” when showing off a figure announcement or some BS when I just want to know what new games have been announced >.> I can do without you trying to start a waifu war in the comments Siliconera -_-)
Anyway, I think I’ve made my reasons for hating her very clear (you just have to search her name on my blog and you’ll get a ton of essays I’m sure, too many to count). And a lot of it is the failure of P5′s writing. “So it’s just the writing you hate, not the character.” No. Because that doesn’t make sense. Except under certain circumstances (which I’ll provide examples of below with Luke Skywalker), you can’t separate the writing from the character. The character IS the writing, the writing IS the character. If you can’t hate/dislike the char because “of the writing” then you also can’t love/like them either. The character and the writing/writing choices for that character are connected. The writing embodies that character. They are the same.
Now I said there was an exception, and that’s....”different writer/director,” tho it’s not ALWAYS the case (sometimes the new writer really gets the original writing, like Saito for MM.....they are very good at emulating the clusterfuck of P5′s writing). P5′s writing is the original basis for Makoto’s character, that’s her. You can’t separate it from her. Same thing with say....Luke Skywalker from the OG trilogy, that’s him. But then we get to the sequel/Disney trilogy, new writer/director....and yeah that’s a mess (from what I understand OG trilogy=Hopeful and tries to see the best in people, 2nd Disney=Cynic and tried to kill a child, 3rd Disney=Hopeful again for some reason). There’s character development, then there’s just straight up changing the character just cause you need them to be this now.
*writes how this can apply to Persona spinoffs but deletes because I was getting too off track* Look at me exercising control. It’s probs best I save that for a meta after I’ve replayed all the spinoffs again.
But....if you want me to boil down my issues with Makoto, I hate the message we get from her. I hate the lesson we learn from her. What is supposed to happen vs what happens. It’s supposed to be about a girl who is blindly following authority and becomes disillusioned with it after being burned by it, on top of “immense pressure” she has as well, and then comes to our side (we know this because Atlus told us). We don’t get that (we know this because we saw the execution). We get two adults, yes TWO ADULTS, one of which is her sister and wants her to do well in school (but isn’t like.....a tiger mom about it, because Sae can’t be TOO horrible because we need to like her later), who in retrospect seems very busy with her job (which gives Makoto freedom), but also feels burdened by her younger sister (in which she has one shitty slip with her and then NEVER again). And the other is a dumbass principal who asks a really strange and stupid task for Makoto that snowballs into bullshit. That’s IT! THAT’S IT! That’s all we get from Makoto and “authority.” Strawmen. We don’t really get much of her personality either (I’m not saying that cause “she’s cardboard” I legit just.....don’t get her? Like I don’t get enough of her to get a solid foundation, you get me?) Like as the player, what we see of her is she’s just studying in the library (Kamo arc), then the principal calls her in, she mentions the rumors about Kamo, he asks her to look into the PT in exchange for a recommendation (to which she’s surprised and says thanks, not no, she looks like she’ll accept JUST BASED ON THAT) but before she can even say Yes (OR NO) he threatens Makoto with her sister, to which Makoto hardens and then agrees. Then she acts like an asshole and yadda yadda stuff happens.
But if she’s supposed to blindly follow authority, she’d say yes, but then they don’t let the character breathe so she can make the “wrong” choice because the Principal goes STRAIGHT to threatening her.......so now the message is muddled, or really it’s non existent. The whole Sae thing is a nothing bag too, it’s just family drama. Her sister is, no HAS to be absent a lot for her work, just so Makoto can have the freedom to be a PT....which means....it hurts her lack of freedom and other stuff associated with Sae being a big pressure on Makoto’s life. You know, I’ve said before they’ve squandered Sae, and that Makoto’s presence really harmed Sae (iirc it was this post). But at the same time, how they handled Sae really screws up Makoto’s character. Neither are allowed to breathe. Neither are allowed to make a true, horrible choice...and then learn from it. They aren’t allowed to have an actual arc. Altus played it safe, took choice away from them, didn’t want to take risks with either character and have meaning. Instead we just have this nothing contradiction thing dicking around until they join our team.
What really sucks about that....is we got that with the Kamo arc. With Anne, Ryuji, even Yuki and Shiho. Kamo was manipulative, and his manipulation caused people to make....not the best choices, all out of a means to survive. Ryuji physically acted against Kamo, and he got his leg broken, team disbanded, and outcasted. Anne was trying to protect Shiho’s position on the team, which lead to her almost getting harmed by Kamo, Shiho getting harmed, her not seeing the truth about what was going on around her, and she didn’t tell Shiho (because she didn’t want Shiho to think she didn’t get on the team for her own merits), and so on. Shiho didn’t tell Anne what was going on because she wanted to protect Anne from Kamo (and was afraid Anne would, very much blame herself), and her and Yuki and the rest of the teams helped keep quiet about Kamo so they wouldn’t be next on the physical chopping block. This isn’t me blaming them, this is me showing their choices, their attempts to fix their (hopeless) situation, to help themselves or others, and the dramatic irony being it just made everything worse. BUT, even tho Kamo was the real one to blame, each character is aware of the actions that were made, and the consequences of each action (esp Anne/Ryuji/Shiho). And in their CoOps, they identify this, and take strides to learn from it so it doesn’t happen again. That’s an arc. That’s character development. They were allowed to make errors, mistakes, decisions that negatively impacted themselves/other’s. We see a solid foundation of their character from the get go, and how it changes over that small time. We don’t get that with Makoto. The group is like solid concrete to Makoto who is like shifting sand.
Sorry got a bit off topic, anyway, I hate her message of boasting about her fighting ability but she only harms her friends (outside of shadows, but that’s not special) WHILE ALSO being a damsel that needs someone else to rescue her! I hate how when she gets called out, she wants to drop it, and gives gaslighty apologies, even tho she really ROYALLY screwed lot of people very badly. I hate how she demands us to help, only to literally be a detriment to our investigation. I hate how she gets to fly off the handle without repercussions (despite needing to be cool calm and collected for her job, especially since she miraculously can do that when needed so what the hell????). I hate how the text has her be shitty, say shitty things, be bad at her job, but will turn around and reward her time and time again.
Sure she doesn’t break the lore like Futaba, or unravel P5′s plot like Goro. But as a character with a message attached to her, even ones that the creators surely overlooked (I’m sure they didn’t intend for her to only hit her friends), it’s simple but very annoying. Fast and easy to see, doesn’t require me to think of P5′s lore as well as the grander Persona lore. Doesn’t require me to dig through text for Goro bread crumbs and then unravel the entire basis of the P5 plot thanks to him. Makoto is easier to get into, it’s smaller scale and more personal I guess.
#silly asks#silly answers#makoto salt#the thing with Kamo's arc is that when you ask 'why' to why a character or a situation is the way it is you can give a decent 'because'#when you ask 'why' with kane's arc.....you don't get that#you get a 'because' but then you keep asking 'why'#why does makoto have to stalk the PT? Because the principal is making her do it#But why is he making her do it? Because the conspiracy is breathing down his neck.#1) WHY her tho? seems a bit contrived and might not work 2) WHY do they care about some principal?#Because......um...... For 2 because he's part of the conspiracy.#Why is he part of the Conspiracy then? Um....they put him there?#BUT WHY did they put him there? Cause....it's prestigious?#BUT the game said Kamo fixed the school's bad rep so it wasn't always that...and he hired kamo.....SO WHY does he owe them getting a job at-#-a shitty school? WHY did he need help getting a job there? WHY is Haru there if-#you see? kane's arc unravels a good portion of what P5 (a least school) is based off of#vs Anne#Why won't Shiho tell Anne about the abuse? She's afraid anne might think it's her (anne's) fault and she loves her friend and wants to-#protect her. why doens't anne tell shiho? Anne doesn't want shiho to think it's shiho's fault and wants to protect shiho#kamo's arc is full of dramatic irony and people making wrong choices (which they might not realize in hindsight)#why doesn't anne know shiho is being abused? Anne thinks shiho is upset about her position on the team also Kamo won't let anyone watch#the practices so we just take the team's words at face value also the teams are protecting kamo to keep from getting hurt-#also shiho won't tell anne anything and so anne just assumes it's a rough practice and that shiho is afraid of losing her spot ALSO#ALSO anne isn't psychic also anne is outcasted from the rest of the school so she doesn't interact with them so she doesn't know what's up-#with other people and-#you can go on they have their bases covered in kamo's arc they have reasons#kamo's arc is also a bit more grounded (kane being ungrounded because of the stupid princpal and his bs0#sorry for the side rant just.......#you don't have to agree with decisions in the kamo arc...but at least they GAVE us reasonings (and the chars are aware#in hindsight that their decisions weren't great and chose to learn from them)
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1, 10, 11, and 12 for the ask game ? 😺🙏💟
Hi hi hi!! You're getting long answers to these bc any excuse to talk about this man makes me go crazy stupid 🙌🙌🙌💕
1) What's a Hot Take you have about your f/o?
HE👏IS👏NEURODIVERGENT!! I'm specifically talking adhd, but he checks a lot of boxes for something more ambiguous too. I'm actually rewriting my adhd sh.aiapouf post and I'm gonna put it here too, but the cut time version IS: noticeable hyperfixations/special interests in music and the monarchy, practically no empathy + has difficulty understanding the emotions of others, fast thinking + thinks a LOT, almost weirdly analytical + book smart with little to no interpersonal skills, extreme emotions all over the board, like there's a LOT here and it explains like 80% of why he's Like That 😤
10) How did you feel when you realized "oh of course I had to like That Character"?
Okay I have a lot to say on this one djnfkffk please bear with me as I write a whole novel
✌U_U ✌
Honestly,, , I wasn't happy LMAOOO, around the time I watched the anime for the first time i was actually still pretty into j.jba and unfortunately was really into dio U_U
I was fascinated by pouf as soon as I saw him in the opening, lots of neat ant designs and then this butterfly man?? I need to know everything about him 👀 His intro with the rainbows in the wings, the fairy chimes, the solo violin, all had me like 👁👁 Sir I Am Going To Study You Like The Insect You Are, and then I saw him actually play the violin and was sold lmao. He was funny as far as comic relief went and then? The giant improv ballet breakdown and antagonistic turn drew me in further and then I was invested in a no going back sorta way as soon as he went chibi for the first time, just watching the chaos of the entire scene with this ridiculous huge grin dhjdkxkf every single thing he did was in the extremes and it was like watching a train de-rail in real time, I saw him face down in the dirt at the end of the arc and didn't even feel anything, he was just so WILD
So I finish h.xh not too long after that and texted a friend and was like hmmm. I need to watch j.jba to return to my roots and also to forget that I think I might've accidentally given myself a lil crush on the butterfly man 😳 idk if that return ever happened but I DO remember being frustrated with how pretty he is,, I didn't really wanna shift hyperfixations at the time and also didn't know if it was attraction or gender envy bc. what I would give to simultaneously look so fem and so masc 👁 either way it was a 3 month struggle of "oh no oh my god I wanna kiss a bug so bad?? 😞" and then I caved at midnight in a denny's and was like okay. fine. I'm gay for a bug, I really really like him but *i* don't have to like that 😤
I did, in fact, proceed to like it, enough to make an entire separate blog for him. It was a slow progression of "I mean, I'd share a ballroom dance with him, like a waltz maybe", "hmm okay he's funny but whatever", "oh uh. he uh. I mean he's neat, a lot of people didn't like him but I just think he's an interesting character 😳" and. and then I finally caved and I never stopped talking sjdkfkf though to be fair, I was already talking about him a LOT on my main, I just decided that maybe it would be nice to have a space to just. contain 90% of my poufposting LMAOOO
Final note on this, but I think what really got me is how many characters are in this series and yet I gravitated towards the one no one could stand 😞✌ though to be fair the hatred for him has definitely gone down compared to what I can remember from a few years ago; absolutely does not change the fact that He Is The Way He Is, but I saw the war crimes, malice, potentially treason, and I won't name it but it's by far the most uncomfortable thing to sit through in the arc, I saw ALL of that and still went hmmmm yes I want that one U_U true love huh
11) Do you think it's better to have copious amounts of content for your f/o, even with the risk of finding a lot of ship art, or better to have a lot less?
The art situation with him is strange bc there's a decent enough to be notable amount of art of him captioned with some variation of "I hated him but he had a really cool character design", but it's still content. Surprisingly, I actually don't track the tag for him but take a look at it anyways almost every day and there's maybe one new thing there like once a week, minimal content bc so many people just didn't like him, which is fair!! But also, he was definitely there as a prominent character, I'd just like to see more of him U_U I would put more art here but I'm too conscious of the art ops seeing my bs over here jdkdkfkk
There actually are a handful of ship art drawings of him, which astounds me bc this man wasn't there to make friends, not even with his own siblings :/, but the errant art of him with morel or kite is honestly pretty cute, please just let this man be happy, I love to see him smile 🥺
12) Aren't you tired of being nice? This is an excuse to rant.
He wasn't the worst guard!! All three had reasons for doing what they did and arguably, pouf's motives were the most complex. Yes he did some pretty awful things, but he considered them to be the right thing to do without a doubt in his mind, all his actions were selfish in that they were based off his own feelings, but he did things ultimately for the king, so his actions also had an edge of selflessness to them as well. He was just. so much more than annoying and while his character development wasn't positive, it was still some pretty astounding growth; as an antagonist, he's also fairly plausible 👀 sometimes people just are manipulative, sometimes feelings do get the better of you, pouf just has all those factors amped up to 11 at all times so they're magnified. I have. a lot of thoughts on him, he interests me very much 😞👀🤔👀
#i am saying so much!! he is very meaningful to me!!#he resonates with me on a weirdly intimate level and while i still don't totally know how to take that#i suppose it's pretty neat nonetheless; i have MANY thoughts about him and i love being able to share them lmao#ty for the ask!!!! ❤💕#lovebug#asks
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Aside from some (for want of a better term or the know how to execute it) “improved” character design on the Dark Riders and maybe the Soul Riders (I’ll go into this on another post), I think what I’d like to see is their Motivation.
“Evil just cause” don’t cut it for me. And I don’t necessarily mean a tragic backstory to explain away everyones case (used sparingly is fine).
First off, is Katja alien or Human? Jorvipedia says she’s human?? But I heard otherwise so…?! Explain that shit, right off the bat. An alien with psychic powers whose been dragged to earth by her boss and hates humans cause she reads their minds and it drives her CRAZY and she not only learned to block it out but to PROJECT thoughts and dreams to turn it around on them? That sounds like a plausible villain. Otherwise why is she working for Mr Sands? What kind of compensation is there? Doesn’t seem like he’s offering her a very glamorous life out there at DC HQ.
(The way the concept art looks though- she looks like a druid turned bad and THAT would make an interesting backstory too- Did elizabeth find her and try to train her only Kat could read minds and could SEE the lies and deception and BULLSHIT in the Druids, and was cast out?? Inquiring minds want to know!)
Sabine I saw more as like, Bellatrix to Voldemort. Maybe he found her when she was younger and impressionable and offered her Power or status.. Maybe she wanted a Sugar daddy and he seemed wealthy and emotionally aloof enough for her. She may not be living in the lap of luxury but she’s dealt with it for so long there’s no leaving now. Yea her dude didn’t give her everything but - What would she go back to? Competing against younger, better girls in Equestrian events? Uh uh too late for that. So she’s bitter, hates these little up and coming champions, and is eager to follow his orders when it comes to destroying their cozy little island.
Jessica I see as Alex gone wrong. She grew up not having a lot and maybe did some work modeling but didn’t have “it” (the “it” that Anne had- fashion is so fickle), at least not enough to make it big. What was she supposed to do then? Find a job cleaning horse shit? Na Uh- she had a taste of glamour and won’t lower herself back to a simple life. Enter Mr. Sands. He senses an ability in her (The portals? So she’s the opposite of Anne? the Sun but like- eclipsed?) and tells her “don’t get mad, get even”. Its not glamorous but its not simple. He might be a dick but its not as bad as her family who came to depend on her (but she cut them off). He finds Jessica in the midst of her rebellious phase and is exploiting the shit out of that.
Elise is- ok so I’ve read she has the power to cause Discord and Chaos and is the opposite of Lisa- can bring illness and Death (but anyone can kill anyone really so let’s ignore that for now). I don’t think they should make her WANT to really kill people or be a bad guy, and I really really don’t want them to be lazy and use any sort of mental illness as an excuse (lord I beg you).
And wait- tangent. If its Katja/Linda, Jessica/Anne, and Elise/Lisa then its Alex/Sabine? She’s the warrior?? That seems weird to me. I would have done it as Sabine/Lisa (youngest-oldest, English-Western, A giver-a thief) and made Jessica the Lightning/Warrior and then Elise could be the anti Anne. But that’s just me.
Anyway. If Elise is discord and chaos then I need her to be a bit of a mess, asymmetrical, curves and angles, etc. I want her to be a little older but kind of lost (like she is now?? lol) and maybe one of the only ones that can be negotiated with (chaos goes both ways, you know. I can see her being a tiny bit traitorous to Sands if it suits her). Maybe she’s from Jorvik but left to try things and travel but .. can’t finish things. She’s too disorganized. Unlike Lisa, who became an int’l pop star, maybe Elise has failed at everything she’s tried to do. So along comes Mr Sands and tells her she HAS a talent and CAN be successful- just let him take over, like a manager, and then he kept her lazy and complacent until he needs her and then basically goads her into unleashing her powers. But where is she? Is she hiding from him cause she doesn’t really want to be a bad guy?
And I need a little more emphasis on their powers being a foil for the others. Like Linda is psychic and can look into the future, but Katja is projective with it. Cool. Having Katja be pale and angular and cold while Linda is darker, rounder and warmer works for me. I like it.
Jessica and Anne looking similar with a different color scheme works for me too, actually. Sun and Eclipse. Anne more tailored and crisp while Jessica is a little more edgy and (faux) sloppy. (and personally I would have put Jessica vs Alex, since she looks more like a fighter)
Sabine vs Alex is a little weird but would again be the Privilaged vs Poor look and thats redundant lol. What is her power? Again, I would have made her the opposite of Lisa and she can sap energy, cause Sabine as a warrior is strange. She doesn’t strike me as proactive, more like sneaky thief in the night…. I don’t know. Maybe they need to make Sabine a little tougher. But then maybe they’re going with “she plays dirty cause she’s a warrior who isn’t so tough”
Elise vs Lisa? If lisa is pop/rock, make her goth/punk (she’d match her horse better lol). Not cause goth or punk is bad, mind you, JUST so she’d match the horse (its all I got). Also I don’t want her to commit fully to any one thing. (Again- if it was me, I’d have made Elise the anti-Anne in the Group- lost for most of the game, messy while Anne is cool and collected, apathetic where Anne wants justice.)
Also I need Sands to have some hold on them. I need there to be some:
Do you want to go back to your old life?
Do you really want to be my enemy?
You’re only really powerful when you’re here with us, but leave if you want u_u
Otherwise, Why are they there? I need to see the manipulation going on there, cause evil for the lulz ain’t it.
Ok rant over.
(keep in mind all this is coming from someone who hasn’t played the original games but they’re changing old canon anyway so anything goes woop)
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I uh. think I might get the 2nd vaccine dose today
#i am tearing myself to pieces over this :////#i KNOW its safe and i KNOW my right wing family is wrong i know i know i know but my anxiety wont let it go#i didnt really react at all to the first one and i know I'll be okay with the 2nd one; i know so many ppl who got it and are okay#and im really beginning to realize how much my parents' opinions dont matter.. they wont like my adhd or my being trans either#and those 2 are fundamental to who i am... this is such a huge psychological upheaval for me and im gonna need so much help after this#im so nervous but know getting the 2nd dose is good; also i may not be so lucky if i get covid again#my anxiety about coming out is making all my nerve stuff just a little worse too; im taking stock of all my symptoms right now#like. growing up while watching the radicalization happen is like. you grow up with your family saying the sky is red and you KNOW#you KNOW that it's blue! ppl you trust tell you it's blue! but you're so so afraid of what will happen if you try to counter it#the idea of being able to leave is something i never could've considered until recently.. i have an apartment deposit down and everything#i know I'll be okay after the shot. i know i know. my family doesnt have a right to know and it's not like they'll believe me anyways#it's all gonna come to a head next week but i really wanna assert myself as a person who makes independent choices#i dont wanna live like this anymore and i think I'll be able to get out soon.. so uh. wish me luck i guess#but yeah.. vaccine......... i want to try and we're gonna have to keep me calm the whole wait time afterwards#im gonna have to talk to all the medical staff to feel okay too#aaaaaa i hate my anxiety i hate hate hate hate hate this; it's gonna all reach fever pitch and fall apart from there#i do think they've earned a wake up call; i want them to have no choice but to LOOK#anyways here's a monologue in the tags i guess; i have a lot on my mind of course U_U#hoatm rants
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I don't know what can I say to you to make you feel better about write ayahina :( I really don't know, but I love your ayahina so much u_u it's great, and you're great, so, please, write whatever you want and make you feel comfortable, but don't forget that you are an amazing ayahina writer
shit, in the last ask I forget to say that, of course I would read your touken spinoff! As I said, you're an amazing writer and is a pleasure read your stories.
Ahhh, thank you anon. I’m touched. Idk, honestly I’m having second thoughts over every scene I write for Ayahina now. I spent yesterday writing Shattered and I wrote like 3 scenes but I go so disappointed in it I ended up deleting all the Ayahina parts. I’m just kinda worried about my presentation of them now that I got a lot of criticisms. I know I shouldn’t because everyone who criticized have been complete assholes about it and were straight up hating but I feel like when I write, I was subconsciously trying to appease these guys.
Like I remember there’s that anon complaining about my presentation of Hinami and that what I wrote was a disservice to her because in canon her feelings for Kaneki are grounded in her trauma while in Shattered in isn’t the case. I mean, I know that Hinami has her reasons for loving Kaneki so deeply and it was supposed to be delved into eventually in the later chapters, but I ended up writing about it in Chapter 4 and it doesn’t feel like the fic is going my way anymore? I know a lot of people really love Shattered and it’s the fic that has done the best among all my Ayahina fics, but I’m like really upset because I’ve been like super insecure over this fic since the beginning and it’s also the fic that had the most criticisms.
I’m actually really pathetic and weak when it comes to things like this. My resolve dies so easily. Right now I feel really insecure about my writing so maybe I might take a break from writing Ayahina entirely :p
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to rant to you but I just ended up doing so anyway. Your message is really sweet, thank you so much! I was thinking of writing Touken for my beloved Touken fandom and friends who’ve been going through a lot of shit recently. So maybe I might work on that instead for the time being. Touken has so much writers though, so I don’t think I see myself permanently moving over to write for them instead. Someone has to keep the dying Ayahina fandom alive after all :’)
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DS9: Tribunal to Prophet Motive
Overall S2 wasn’t really that much better than S1, though it did have a handful of eps that were genuinely “good” television. S3’s also spotty but slightly better. One S3 trend I don’t like is the SUPER heavy-handed selling of Kira/Odo from basically the first ep on, and how it comes entirely out of nowhere. Also, Keiko is royally and consistently shafted and ignored, which is frustrating as hell. They FINALLY give her something to do, and not only is it presented as a “gift” from her husband(which, Ick! Like she’s not following the going’s on in her own damn profession???), they use it to effectively write her off the show! Ridiculous >:(
Tribunal: Bad. What’s the point of doing a courtroom ep that isn’t a courtroom ep? Sure, I can understand the theoretical appeal of the irony of a trial episode about a show trial, but you really need to embrace the absurdity of the concept for it to work and they didn’t. Also, the Cardassians are one-note(like all the non-human species in ST), and their one-note is “Order”, so Cardassian law, even if entirely show-trials in practice, really ought to be procedurally meticulous. An ep about Odo, skilled in these procedures from his time as a Cardassian security chief, out bureaucrating a culture of military bureaucrats to stall for time while the DS9 crew finds dirt to blackmail the Cardassians with would have been great and probably darkly funny; this was just dull. Also, there’s no way the Fed would stand for a Starfleet officer being snatched out of a Fed shuttle in Fed space like that, smuggling weapons or no, or believe for one second the Cardassian claim weapons were on the shuttle in the first place, given their past experiences. This would have caused a major diplomatic incident, and the Fed embassy corps on Cardassia Prime would have been all over O’Brien like ants on a summer picnic.
The Jem’Hadar: Fun and Good. Trying to do something simple and succeeds. Quark’s rant to Sisko about Ferengi history is obvsl convenient writing rather than fact -in TNG they’re aggressive, needlessly violent cruel pirates who, I’m pretty sure, are explicitly slavers as well- but it SHOULD be right. They’d be more interesting as a culture built around a capitalism that never saw any profit in compulsion. Historically, while slavery pre-dated capitalism in Earthican societies, slavery as we think about it -dehumanization, brutality, murderous forced labor- has nigh-universally been associated with capitalism, and quite frequently with commerce(Greek, Roman, and American slavery were all basically built around ag production for commercial markets[though slave-artisans based in cities was a significant part of the Greek and Roman systems as well]). That internal contradiction, attached to a larger ethical distaste for direct, personal violence(and valorization of tattling that’d go along with the instinctive distress-cry DS9 gives to Ferengi), while still being the profit-driven thieves and schemers they are, would have been Compelling.
The Search is… OK. I mean, as television it’s fine. The plot doesn’t make any damn sense though. The Dominion makes it clear they don’t want the Fed entering their territory and the Fed’s response is… to infiltrate deep into their territory to find the Homeworld of their leaders and confront them with the only warship in the Fed fleet? This move is basically designed to start a war. Also, they seem to forget that they’ve had Odo come to the Gamma Quadrant before, so his whole “I feel drawn to this nebula” deal seems out of left-field. Also Also, they should have used The Defiant to add the Romulan liaison as a regular cast member, instead of bringing on Eddington and doing nothing with him. Having Sisko, who has had an excellent relationship with Odo until now, suddenly giving this speech about how he doesn’t like that Odo isn’t “a team player” is pretty ridiculous as well(and out of character. Sisko’s not a team player. His WHOLE CREW is made up of square pegs just like himself). Also Also Also, a Romulan security officer who spends a season or two building up relationships with the maincast, sashaying around being arrogant and cynical in Romulan kimonos during her off-time, gradually developing Maquis sympathies, becomes Sisko’s evil!Valjean and remains so until nearly the end of the series would have been a genuinely surprising character-arc requiring consistently good writing to sell, and kind of explain why, in later eps, the Romulans wouldn’t require one of their own to protect and operate the cloak. Or hey! Maybe her becoming a Maquis could begin as a plot to foment rebellion in the Fed, that’d be neat.
Equilibrium: Meh
Second Skin: Good in some parts, but that the journals would be what starts cracking Kira up isn’t believable and it just isn’t mindfucky enough. Also, Kira’s warmth towards her fake dad at the end of the ep didn’t feel earned. Maybe if they’d had her bond with him over having lost family in the Occupation.
The Abandoned: pretty offensively essentialist, really. Especially given the plotline later in the series(iirc) about a Jem’Hadar trying to break his people’s addiction to ketracel-White, which kinda undermines this eps whole “the Jem’Hadar have no will of their own and are genetically programmed soldiers that it’s useless to reason with” line.
Civil Defense: good. It remains unbelievable to me, though, that Starfleet wouldn’t have done a complete refit of the whole station the minute the Cardassians left, especially given the Star Trek obsession with hard-wired, analog computing.
Meridian: a noxious pile of garbage all round. The subplot is skeezy, but at least it’s in-character, well-written, and believable which the main plot certainly is not. I kinda wish that, if they were going to include such a scummy sub-plot in the ep, they’d at least made it a bit interesting by subverting expectations. At the end, have Tiron be at first taken aback, and then surprisingly pleased with Kira’s modifications to the program. He walks out, “deeply satisfied” with the program and pays 20% extra for it, compliments Quark on his “creativity” as a holodesigner with a slightly amorous look, Quark is clueless and confused yet pleased, Kira and Odo are absolutely mortified. Then maybe leave it around as a Chekov’s Gun; Quark makes a secret copy(of course), offering it to only his best customers, it leads to a small but noticeable increase in custom, then someday in a later season he checks it out and is Horrified to find he’s unknowingly made himself one of the most popular porn-performers in the sector :|
Defiant: fine as it is, except there should have been a bit about HOW the Maquis found out about the Defiant and knew about its cloak. This would be a good time to introduce the long-arc of the Romulan officer’s Maquis sympathies/attempts to use her position on DS9 to co-opt the Maquis and undermine the Federation.
Fascination: dumb and really Skeezy, Ferrell’s is the only entertaining performance in the ep, but, again, the smooch-directing of this series is uncommonly good. Also: Miles is not just a bad dad, but also a bad husband. Also Also: Bajor’s only 3 hours away in a runabout or shuttle for Frak’s sake? You can’t be bothered to go visit her?? People in Texas regularly make three hour drives every DAY.
Past Tense: One of my favorite eps of the series; heavily Nostalgic for me. Having now read To Say Nothing of the Dog, however, I do wish ST writers treated Time and Causality as more robust and stubborn than they tend to.
Life Support: The inevitable killing off of a past love-interest to free Kira up for Kirdo. Bareil was bland and boring anyway, even if his performances in S3 were much improved. Why the heck is the Kai negotiating treaties??? That the Kai and Vedeks plays a direct, institutional role in Bajoran politics needed to be established before jumping into a plotline about the Kai negotiating a secret peace pact with Cardassia. The subplot with Jake and Nog, which reduces the question of female personhood to a “cultural issue” in the context of Nog’s misogyny ruining Jake’s chances with a girl who never appears again(iirc), is repulsive in about a half-dozen ways.
Heart of Stone: Ho-hum. The Nog in Starfleet storyline is good, but they should have built up to it in previous eps. Wesley spends pretty much all his time before acceptance doing science experiments and apprenticing in various departments on Enterprise to build up his resume just to qualify to take the exams; having Nog accomplish the same task with a letter of rec is kinda |:T Also: wouldn’t Sisko have pointed out that, in the Fed and Starfleet, Nog’s “gift” would be interpreted as an attempted bribe and get him immediately arrested? Seems like an important cultural rule to point out to a Ferengi |:T |:T
Destiny: Good. Ulani and Gilora are obviously lesbians and I won’t hear another word on the matter u_u
Prophet Motive: Fun and Good, though the “evolved” talk re: social constructs and cultural modes was annoying.
Why are S3′s subplots so much better done than it’s main ones? I imagine the discipline of having limited time to complete them in has something to do with it. Some other observations:
A-plot B-plot structure is entirely standard in S2 and S3, probably because it’s an obvious way to include such a large cast, but then all the plots revolve around the same handful of characters, so the opportunity is wasted.
It’d have been nice if every species was given the same variety of clothing the Ferengi get to have. Having Caradassians wear mil uniforms IN THEIR OWN HOMES, and when they are scientists, is absurd.
DS9 continues the Trek tradition of having a real nebulous and unexplained relationship with money.
DS9 really needed more women writers and head-writers on staff. Why are male writers so bad at this???
I really need to get in the habit of taking notes while I watch so I can give more detailed reactions later -__-
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