#anyways i mainly wrote this so i can link it in my rules

[k-chips]

Late ask, but just wtf is Sanremo? All I can tell it's something Catholic and has to do with a Saint, but based on the chaos I saw in your reblogs, it also isn't?? The Italian part of me needs to know, mainly because it makes sense for a festival about a Saint to be insane, seeing as many stories about them are pretty insane (read in a children's book on St. Francis of Aussi that when he accepted God's call he stripped naked and strolled out of town, while heard St. Patrick once cursed a group of people being jerks to be werewolves (he asked God to help him out and God was like "Yeah I'll grant you a solid my dude")

So, what is Sanremo??

Oh my gosh. What did you ask. You opened Hell.

(Sorry, this is a bit long but it's funny af)

Nono it's not something Catholic, it's called Sanremo because it takes place in Sanremo, a city in Liguria.

Sanremo it's the "Festival of the italian song" (people can only sing in Italian, that's one of the rules)

[[Before this edition of Sanremo started I found a very cool, funny and useful guide for non italians that explained what is Sanremo and how it works, you can find it here]]

[[since that's for last year, here's also the thread for this year edition, just to see what changed]]

But, basically, it's a musical competition where we decide who's gonna represent Italy in Eurovision. Sanremo is way older than Eurovision toh, at first it was just a competition on its own but then they decided to use it for Eurovision too.

The reason why it looks so chaotic it's because IT IS CHAOTIC XD at least it has been for the past 4 years, it became so much fun to watch. So many funny things happened.

We once had this guy, Morgan, who changed his lyric to insult the guy who was gonna sing with him, Bugo. And this poor guy just straight up left the stage and DISAPPEARED for the rest of the night 💀

This was the host's reaction

(I love this guy lol he's so funny)

Or every time someone does something very homoerotic on stage, just because. Especially the two hosts we had for the past 3 years, the ones in the pic above. (we ship them so much. FOR FUN, shipping real people is gross)

Here they were dancing... :'D

Here with some cool wigs

They're so silly lol

OK I THINK THAT'S ENOUGH AHAH

There are a lot of other things, some scandals here and there (mostly right wing italians being scandalized), cool songs, a bit of sexism (we're working on it), some good feminism and LGBT+ and some more funny moments, like the host (the guy with the blonde wig) that this year started using Instagram to be "Less boomer" and was doing live streams during the festival (hilariously and adorably cringe) but I don't want to bore you ahah

Anyway, the links I left here are very funny threads on Twitter if you want to read something faster and more funny

(SORRY FOR MY BAD ENGLISH. I was on the train and to walk home so I didn't have time to check everything I wrote)

[thecoramaria]

Hi, hope you're doing well! So I saw in the Youtube community tab that you were talking about/asking about epitheths, and wondered if you maybe could help me with a teeny-tiny problem. I tend to try and avoid epitheths at all costs because I can never get them to feel natural but since I mainly write fanfics with characters with the same pronouns, I tend to overuse their names... a lot (point in case: my latest draft is currently at 3906 words, and I have 78 mentions of one character's name, 71 of the other, and together it becomes a whopping 3.8% of that draft just being one of their names). I have no idea how to cut it down as I just can't do epitheths and it's diffcult to make it clear who's doing what if I'm just using pronouns.

Okay, to answer this ask, I thought I could just copy and paste the script I wrote for a video about this very topic, but as it turns out, I haven't written it yet. Whoops!

So in that post, I said that epithets are usually a symptom of a different problem in a writers prose. It's one that goes three layers deep.

Writers usually use epitaphs because they feel like they overuse the names of the characters, or struggle with characters that have the same pronouns (I once wrote a chapter where every character in it used they/them pronouns, and it was as tricky as you can imagine). Usually the advice people tout is "Just use the names and pronouns anyway! There's no such thing as overusing them!" but like... you've already followed that advice, and you still feel like there's an issue.

You're probably right.

When I find myself overusing names in narration, it's usually because every sentence begins with a character's name or pronoun. This is both due to a lack of varied sentence structure, and the use of filter words.

But what do I mean by that? Let me whip up an example:

Link entered the house. He smelled pumpkin soup bubbling in the cauldron. Uncle Rusl greeted him as he ladled Link a bowl. Link's stomach grumbled. He crossed the room and took the bowl. Rusl served himself next, and they sat at the dining table together.

(So this scene breaks the "show, don't tell" rule, but for the purpose of focusing on epitaphs, we're just gonna ignore that.)

See how every sentence begins with a character's name or pronoun? The temptation inexperienced fic writers have would be to replace some of those with epitaphs, but really, the solution is to remove filter words (he smelled, she saw, they thought, etc), as well as change up the sentence structure.

When Link entered the house, he was welcomed first by the warm aroma of pumpkin soup bubbling in the cauldron, and second by Uncle Rusl ladling him a bowl. Stomach grumbling, Link graciously took it. Once Rusl had served himself, they sat at the dining table together.

See how, by removing the filter and beginning sentences with something other than a name or pronoun, I was able to make the prose more dynamic? There's still plenty of names and pronouns, but their constant use doesn't stick out as much.

Now, it's important not to overcorrect by trying to ensure that no sentence begins with a name or pronoun, because it's absolutely okay to structure your sentences that way sometimes. The problem comes from when every sentence begins that way, because that's when writers will try to hide the problem with epithets rather than switching up their sentence structure.

Hope this helps!

[mjm5655]

SHIPPING INFORMATION

this post is honestly going to be half a headcanon, & just half general stuff i require for shipping on this blog, since majima is literally my first muse ( i have mostly wrote villains & animal characters in the past ) that can actually develop into having romantic relationships. i'll likely be linking this under shipping in my rules so it's easily accessible in the future.

it should be noted first that majima is a very dangerous man, in most of his canon verses, he is yakuza, & even verses where he is not yakuza a good majority of the time, he's still got that vibe to him ; he'll still smash a dude's head in if it called for it. he's also an enforcer in the yakuza, which is the type of yakuza that will carry out punishments, & even hits. this can make him a huge target to others, & his loved one can end up getting in this kind of mess too if they are discovered.

going off the previous, later on, when he has really established his family, he is considered the reigning force of the tojo clan, the chairman, daigo even has a lot of respect for majima, & tends to lean on him for advice, but anyway, his family consists of several thousand men, & maybe some women here & there. not all of them are outright yakuza, some are construction workers, some run clubs, but a good majority of them are yakuza. it is shown in the first yakuza mainly that majima has no issue punishing & killing any of his men that step out of line, & i would consider this still goes for the later verses too ! he is quite aggressive. but this is another thing that will have other clans going for his head, knowing he's the reigning force of the tojo clan, they realise this will be a big hit to the tojo clan if they were able to land a hit on majima, & were successful with it, likewise, his loved ones could be targeted to draw him out.

saying all this, majima is very soft toward women, he has a huge soft spot for them considering how scary of a yakuza he is, some women he goes with might not agree with this, & want to try & fix him, but honestly, hate to break it to you, there is no fixing him, this is the way he is, he would sooner want to break up if he felt he was going to be as controlled. generally, if a relationship is to go well with majima, this is something his partner will just have to accept, that it's a part of him.

if the partner can accept this fact, he is extremely protective, for example, if anyone even looks at his partner in the wrong way, they are walking on thin ice around majima. majima is very much willing to kill to protect the one he loves.

i headcanon majima to be heteroflexible, this means he mostly does prefer women, but he can be attracted to other men, there is dialogue that he says as goromi which reveals this, & also more dialogue when he's in a dirty dvd store ( where he discovers videos of naked buff men "wrestling" & seems into it ).

he does have his tastes when it comes to men, he really only likes strong, as in buff men, he wouldn't be interested in men who aren't, & he tends to really only want to have flings with men, nothing really serious, just a bit of fun.

as for women, he can be a bit of the polar opposite here, he really likes any kind of woman, he's not picky when it comes to his type of woman. though, he does have a preference to those he considers cute.

now just some general rules when it comes to shipping here !

i will only ship our muses if there is enough ooc plotting involved. i'm not into pre-established shipping, or just shipping on the fly, i prefer there's some development in the threads as well as plotting ooc for it.

majima has various different verses, his age range in them are 20-54. i would normally set him in a verse whereas there is not a large age gap between the two.

i do not outright roleplay fluffy stuff, so don't expect a lot of it.

smut may be written, but i will require there to be a lot of plotting involved, this just won't happen if no plotting, i choose to not write it in threads, i prefer doing so in asks only.

i don't like to write anything involving pregnancy. if our muses have kids, it's either via adoption, or we skip that part of the roleplay entirely. majima has kind of hinted at wanting kids in the series, so it is something that would otherwise have the chance of popping up but i would not write the pregnancy part & i ask people to at least respect this.

[sovaharbor]

do u guys wanna see the automod script i just wrote for the *metoph*bia subreddit i help moderate

#The following script is for text submissions, mainly to curb false reassurance seeking atm type: text submission body (full-text): [“will this make me sick”, “will i get sick”, “will i tu”, “will this make me tu”, “does this mean i will tu”, “will i get fp”, “will i get a sb”, “will i get nv”, “what are the chances of me”, “is it contagious”, “will i throw up”, “will this make me throw up”, “will i get food poisoning”, “will i get a stomach bug”, “does this mean i will throw up”, “will i get norovirus”] action: filter action_reason: false reassurance seeking comment: Hi /u/{{author}}! It looks like you’re seeking false reassurance, which is not allowed in our subreddit as per rule 3. This is because it is harmful to sufferers of emetophobia. You are more than welcome to edit your post’s content and then make a new post. If you think this was a mistake, please contact the moderators. If you are struggling at the moment, (here is a link to resources to help with anxiety/panic)[link] set_locked: true

i cant even begin to explain how fucking nice it will be once we implement this shit because Oh <My Fuckingn God do we have so many people just blatantly ignoring this rule

also i told my therapist abt this and she was like......well honey as long as it's not harmful to you! and i'm sitting here rn like god. no. u know what. i think it's actually REALLY fucking helping my recovery atm because i just am constantly reminded of how bad i used to be and how i NEVER want to be in that place ever again. and also i've always been so talk the talk but cant walk the walk when it comes to my recovery, as ik so many of us can be at times lmao, but like....if im out here providing heartfelt advice to ppl struggling in such low places it feels kinda insane of me to not also be working on myself ykwim. like. yeah. anyways. this script is so sexy

[curtaincalling]

regarding shipping:

Jhin is between 38-40 in his classic verse. So I am only comfortable shipping him with characters who are at least above 30. In modern verse, I write him a bit younger and with a wider age range — anywhere between 32-38 — and thus a romantic partner probably above 28.

I don’t mind if you want to ship with Jhin. But please don’t approach interaction with that as a sole intention. It makes me extremely uncomfortable when people see my muse as a means to their ship content. I humbly ask that you keep an open mind when plotting with me, and if you do think our muses will be compatible in a romantic relationship, you can let me know and I’ll tell you my thoughts.

The nature of Jhin’s character means that his relationships are, ah, turbulent. He kills that which he loves; that’s his whole thing. And so while he may not succeed or even act upon killing your muse (depending on the circumstances), it’s definitely a thing that will have to be addressed.

For that reason, I am only comfortable writing ships with muns who I’m able to talk extensively with. I don’t want to come across as romanticizing or trying to redeem Jhin. I write from Jhin’s perspective, so there will be a lot of misleading things. He’s an unreliable narrator and a great actor, and I am only able to write that to its full extent when there is good communication between muns. 

so anyways: the handy guide to shipping with elli’s jhin: check your character’s age -> interact a little, see if they click -> let me know if a romantic relationship is something you think would work -> lots of ooc plotting from there -> boom! you got yourself a bastard lad.

[pirate-rat9]

Does anyone else headcanon that Princess Zelda from Breath of the Wild is neurodivergent? I mean, I could just be projecting or grasping at straws, but bear with me here. Also, this is going to include mainly evidence from BotW and the book Creating a Champion because I haven’t had the time to sit down and play Age of Calamity all the way thru yet.

First of all, Zelda has hyperfixations/special interests.

1. Sheikah technology

On page 379 in the book Creating a Champion, it states that “she was able to restore ancient technology to a working state, putting her technological prowess on par with that of Sheikah researchers of the time.” Remember, she’s 16 here, and she knows so much about Sheikah tech that she is on par with other Sheikah researchers who are probably decades older than her.

In Memory #3: Resolve and Grief, she rambles about the Divine Beasts.

In Memory #4: Daruk’s Mettle, she is literally working on Divine Beast Vah Rudania all by herself. She is 16 years old and she knows how to fix giant 10,000 year old machines by herself.

In Memory #12: Father and Daughter, she’s observing some Sheikah scientists working on a guardian, and she knows exactly what’s going on.

In King Rhoam’s Journal it says, “Zelda's eyes lit up like a wildfire when I told her about the relics... I must admit, she has a knack for research.” This is before the Queen’s death. She’s like 5 years old here and she’s already researching advanced ancient technology. She got into Sheikah tech very young, so ancient technology is probably a hyperfixation/special interest of hers that has lasted for years.

Also, since neurodiveregnt people tend to know a hell of a lot about their hyperfixations/special interests, it would make sense that Zelda’s vast knowledge of ancient technology and wildlife comes from her being hyperfixated on those subjects.

2. Flora and Fauna

In Memory #9: Silent Princess, Zelda captures a frog and immediately starts infodumping to Link about the scientific properties of frogs. Her eyes literally light up and she starts talking extremely fast, which is something that I definitely do when infodumping.

In that same memory, she talks about how useful the flowers are for a variety of things, showing that she knows the different uses of all of those flowers.

Also in Memory #9, she rambles about the Silent Princess.

In her study, you can see a lot of plants that she grew and studied.

Zelda also seems to have issues with social cues, and she’s just not good at social interactions in general.

In Memory #9, Zelda seems to not notice that Link is uncomfortable when she shoves the frog towards him and continues to try to get him to eat the frog.

In Memory #12, when King Rhoam asks Zelda what she’s doing, instead of just answering the question, she goes on to ramble about guardians. Her father was clearly upset and didn’t want to hear about guardians, but she started to talk about them anyway.

She also seems to misinterpret social cues, like when she mistook Link’s silence as hatred.

She’s also extremely closed off and never tells people about her problems. Like when her mom died and she didn’t cry at her funeral and didn’t even open up about it until a year later.

Zelda doesn’t seem to have many friends. Like at all.

Literally her only friends are Impa, Purah, Robbie, Urbosa, and later on Link. That’s really not a lot of people, and almost none of them are her age.

Also, she has trouble seeing other people’s problems and emotions and putting herself in other peoples’ shoes, like when she wrote in her diary, “Everyone has struggles that go unseen by the world... I was so absorbed with my own problems, I failed to see his.”

Zelda has issues with emotions.

She clearly has many issues dealing with and expressing her emotions (although this could just be from trauma but still).

When things go wrong, she tends to get extremely upset. A perfect example of this is Memory #5: Zelda’s Resentment. She was extremely depressed and frustrated with her duty and Link, and the shrine not working for her just made her more upset. When Link came along and found her, she blew up at him for merely doing his job.

Also, she didn’t cry during her mother’s funeral because she felt she had to be strong. Her mother died when she was 6.

She didn’t even open up about her pain until a year later, when she passed out in the Spring of Power and Urbosa had to get her out. As far as we know, Urbosa was the only person who Zelda opened up to growing up.

She also has issues with criticism and perceived criticism.

When her father berated her for “ignoring her duty,” she wrote in her diary, “I was so frustrated and ashamed I could not even speak.”

Also, she saw Link’s silence as hatred, and she got extremely defensive and self conscious.

Zelda is extremely impulsive.

She ran off on Link during Memory #5 because she wanted to investigate a shrine, although she could’ve easily been attacked by monsters or the Yiga Clan, or she could’ve just gotten hurt in general.

In Memory #7: Blades of the Yiga, she went out into the extremely dangerous desert on her own, which almost resulted in her death.

She also tried to get Link to eat a frog completely out of the blue because she wanted to do an experiment.

Miscellaneous evidence:

Zelda is extremely rigid with rules, to the point where she prays everyday for 10 years and even puts her health at risk to pray.

She has anxiety to the point where it can keep her up at night (this is from Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity), and although anxiety isn’t a requirement to be neurodivergent, it’s often comorbid with things like adhd or autism.

So I mean yeah, that’s my evidence. I know that you could probably say that a lot of these issues come from trauma or insecurity and her love of science could just come from extreme intelligence, but I like to think that she’s also neurodivergent. Don’t get me wrong, she definitely has a lot of trauma and issues, and I also headcanon her as being like genius levels of smart, but I think it’s interesting to think of her as neurodivergent too.

[nanaminsonyfans]

✨Birds of a Feather✨

Masterlist ✨ Requesting Rules

Request; Could I request a YJs1 Dick x reader with the reader being new to the team and a protege of black canary? He’s my favourite 🥰

A/N; honestly, if one robin is AT LEAST one of your favorites, if they aren’t in the top three, i don’t trust you. also, i really like the way i wrote this a stuff, if anyone wants i can make this a thing. I fucking grew up on young justice i love these characters. rock and roll buckeroo!

Pairing; Dick Grayson(Robin) x Fem!Reader

Warnings; fluff, slight cursing

Your upbringing wasn’t pleasant, for a short backstory, Black Canary found you when she did a raid on an illegal Meta-Human fighting ring. Your parents sold you to the leader of the ring. Your power was similar to Canary’s, in which your voice was a power. You could mimic sounds around you like a mockingbird, but you had similarities with an owl in the fact that your neck could turn all the way around and you had night vision. Black Canary found you when you were ten, taking you in as her own. She took you under her wing. *dad jokehehuheh*

She had taken care of you for four years, you ever really made you debut as a hero, until Batman started the underground team of sidekicks. Robin of course knew of you, as did Batman because, duh. Well, Roy did too but that was mainly because Green Arrow was dating Canary. He was like a big brother, and he deeply cared for you. 

“And this is Black Canary’s protégé, Mockingbird.” You walked out from the shadows, a black hoodie and red jeans on. Your hoodie had your favorite band one it, whatever it may be. “Sup.” You nod your head at the boys, your hood covered your face since it was dark but you also had glasses on, kinda like Robin’s but they were reading glasses. The glasses could profile anyone and bring up their history, if it’s in the web or files on the cloud, you gotem.

Kid Flash was easy, he didn’t both with covering his face, everyone else was open with you, but not Robin. You glasses always got glitched out when you tried to activate them while looking at him. He knew this and did it on purpose. He didn’t know much about you, only you hero name, you also did that on purpose, it was a fun little battle. You were closer to Robin anyways, being close in age but that didn’t stop Wally from flirting. “Hey babe~ Wanna spar~?” The redhead would ask, before you could speak he would go pale. “Nevermind.” Then he’d run away, you guessed it was Robin, he had mastered the infamous bat-glare.

When Artemis joined the team, you were happy. Another human girl on the team, no offense to M’gann but you felt more comfortable with another human female around. Plus, she was funny. You lived in Star City with Diane and Oliver, and you met her first, it was awesome when you came with her to the Cave and saw all of them shocked.

“What’s up, birdy?” You smile as you trotted over to Robin, you didn’t really have a superhero suit, you kinda took after Black Canary, civilian clothes were your hero clothes. It was usually blood stained black leggings, a navy blue crop top hoodie and black paint around your eyes and bridge of your nose rather than a regular mask because those were itchy. “Do NOT call me that.” Boy Wonder grumbled and elbowed you playfully. You gave him a smirk and batted you eyelashes at him. “You love me.” “No I don’t.” He snorted.

“The Wallman is here!” A redhead yelled through the zeta-tubes as he entered, the loud noise made you yelp and grab onto the nearest person, which was Robin. When you both realized that you both turned red. “Yeesh...stay whelmed Mockingbird.” He finally got out after being frozen. You both had completely ignored the situation going on around you, until...

“Recognize: Speedy, B06.” The computer spoke, making you grinning like an idiot and turn towards the tubes. “Well for starters, he doesn’t go by speedy anymore. Call me Red Arrow.” Your eyes lit up at your brother, well not really brother but you both looked at each other as such. “Roy-” Oliver started but you cut him off. “Roy!” You yelled happily and ran towards your redhead. “Wa to ruin his moment...” Wally grumbled but you flipped him off as you hugged Roy. “Why don’t you call anymore? I’ve been worried. So was Olly, and I guess Robin, Kaldur, and Wally, but I’m your sister!” You whined and teared up, your tears mixing with the paint you used as a mask causing black tears.

“Oh birdie...you know why.” Roy soothed causing you to sniffle and rub your tears away. “Right, sorry.” You mumble and pull away, “Sorry.” You mumbled again and walked back to your spot by Robin, the taller boy put a hand on your shoulder. “Roy, you look-” Oliver started, “Replaceable.” Roy hissed and walked over. “You know it’s not like that.” “Then why bother with a sub? Can she even use that bow?” He gestured angrily to the blonde archer. “Yes she can.” Artemis hissed back. “Who are you?!” Wally whined. “I’m his niece.” “She’s his niece.” “She’s my niece.” Artemis, you, and Green Arrow stated in a matter-of-fact like tone. “Another niece?” Robin snorted, earning an elbow from you.

“But he’s not your replacement!” You chimed in, walking over to the arrows. “We have always wanted you on the team.” Aqualad said, walking over to the now, Red Arrow. “And we have no quota on archers.” The leader continued. “And if we did, you know who we’d pick!” Wally chimed, glaring over at Artemis. “Whatever Baywatch,” Artemis glared, “I’m here to stay.” You stifled a chuckle and looked away. “Baywatch...” You snorted. “But you came here for a reason, right Roy?” You asked when you finally calmed down. “Yeah, a reason named Dr. Sterling Roquette.”

Both yours and Robin’s eyes widened before you both pulled up a file with the holographic computer. “Nano-robotics genius-” Robin started as he began typing. “And claytronics expert at Royal University in Star City! I love her!” You finished and gushed the last part. “Vanished two weeks ago.” Robin continued, earning a frown on your face. “Abducted two weeks ago, by the League of Shadows.” “Woah, you want us to rescue her from The Shadows?” Boy wonder said in a hopeful tone. “Hardcore.” Wally said in awe and fist bumped the other boy. “Dumbasses.” You scoffed and hit them both in the back of the neck. “Roy probably already did that.” You pointed out and walked over to him with a big smile. Roy smiled back and ruffled your hair. “She’s right, I already rescued her. There’s only one problem, the shadows already got her to make a weapon, ‘Doc call it the Fog.” Roy pulled up an image of a dark cylinder looking object with red buttons.

“It’s comprised of millions of microscopic robots, nanotech infiltrators, capable of disintegrating anything in their path- concrete, steel, flesh, bone.- but it’s true purpose isn’t mere destruction. It’s theft. The infiltrators eat and story raw data from any computer system and deliver the stolen data to the Shadows. Providing them access to weapons, strategic defense, cutting edge science and tech.” “Perfect for extortion, manipulation, and power broking.” Artemis starts, earning a groan from Wally, an admiring look from you, and a knowing look from Robin. “Yep. Sounds like The Shadows.” She finishes. “Oh like you know anything about The Shadows.” Wally groans and glares at the blonde, who just smirks. “Who ARE you?!” Wally yells obviously irritated, both you and Robin chuckled a little.

“Roquette’s working on a virus to render the Fog inert.” Roy says, ignoring the childish behavior. “But if The Shadows know she can do that...” Robin started quietly, you gasped softly. “They’ll target her.” You whisper in shock. “It’s okay, right now she’s off the grid. I stashed her in a local highschool computer lab.” Roy shrugs, opening his mouth to speak again. “You left her alone?” Green Arrow asks in shock and mild disappointment. ‘Oh great, here we go again.’ You think as you roll  you eyes. “She’s safe enough for now.” Roy spits and glares at Oliver. “Then let’s you and I take care of that together.” “You and I? Don’t you want to take your new protogé.” The redhead spits again, earning a groan from you. “Roy, you brought this to the team, we’ll talk care of it okay?” You say softly, putting your hand on his shoulder. “And she is part of the team. I promise nothing bad will happen. Trust me, big bro.” You smile, a child like glint in you e/c eyes. “Fine, Y/n. I trust you.” Roy whispered, kissing your forehead before leaving. “Speedy-” The computer started, “Change that to Red Arrow.” You spoke up before Roy could, you winked at him before he left.

Robin knew it was a platonic gesture, you both looked at each other like siblings, he knew that. He fucking knew but a piece of him was jealous. He didn’t know why, maybe he like you? No, he wouldn’t, doesn’t matter anyways. The team had a mission to do. But god damnit he couldn’t stop thinking about it. He wished he could be the one kissing your forehead, holding you, knowing your actual name like Roy did. Damn, being a teenager with feelings fucking SUCKS. 

All of a sudden you all were linked up by Miss Martian telepathy. “Everyone online?” Her voice rung inside your head, causing a giggle. “Mhm.”  You hummed in your head while you sat on a table between Kid Flash and Robin. “Woah, this is weird.” Artemis said, in her head of course, and you just giggled in response. “I know right? Prepare for a killer headache when Megan cuts it off!” You giggled more as you popped some of Wally’s fruit snacks in your mouth. Then the doctor started complaining. “Lady, I’m not really diggin your attitude right now.” You say while rolling your eyes. “You literally look like some random kid they got from the street!” The doctor replied earning a huff from you as you sat up straight. 

“You literally look like some random kid they got from the street.” You said, using your mocking power, you spoke in her exact voice, earning a shocked look from her. “Now shut the fuck up.” You hissed in your normal voice, earning a stern look from Aqualad. “Oh don’t judge my language fish boy.” You grumbled and crossed your arms, looking through a blind. “Do you always act like this when people try to help you?” Wally’s voice rung in your head. “Pot, kettle, you’ve met?” Artemis replied, you snickered slightly. “Great, now I want kettle corn. Thanks Art.” You whined and then ignored them arguing until Robin spoke. “You should give her some more credit. It was /her/ arrow that saved you from Amazo.” Robin said with a smirk, in which you practically swooned. “No, it was Spee-Red Arrow’s arrow, right?” “Not so much.” Robin snickered and you did as well. 

“God I love his voice.” You thought and then you realized that everyone was connected, SHIT. Your eyes widened and your face turned red. “I mean haha, I was thinking of something else.” You got up. “I’ll...I’ll go an patrol the halls...hall monitor duties.” You got up. “Oh god oh god. This is so embarrassing.” You though as you messed with your fingerless gloves. “Should we tell her?” Wally’s voice rang in your head, you could feel him smirking. “THEN DON’T LISTEN!” You screamed from the hallway and you could hear his laughs. Everyone basically knew you had a crush on Robin, it was obvious to everyone but him. He felt the same, it was also obvious to everyone but you. This was not the TIME.

You were walking down the hall, until you heard footsteps behind you. You turned around, punching the figure and wrapping you legs around the person’s waist as you pinned them down. “Woah woah, stay whelmed, Mockingbird.” You squeezes you legs tighter when you realized it was Robin. “What do you want?” You whisper-shouted. “You seemed to be distraught. You really should get traught.” He gave you a smirk that you always melted over. “Mind not squeezing me to death?” He asked and you flushed as you let him go from you thighs crushing him. 

“Your wordplay is so stupid...” You smiled softly and tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. “So what? You said you love my voice.” Robin teased. “I do.” You sighed and then covered your mouth in shock. “I-I mean...shut up!” Robin bit his lip and rubbed the back of his neck. “I have to head out with Superboy.” He mumbled in which you sighed and grabbed his wrist before he could leave. “Be safe okay?” You whisper softly, getting closer to him. His lips were inches away from your. Robin smiled and kissed your forehead. “I’ll try.” He smiled in which you turned so red you were sure you would’ve been glowing. “It’s Y/n...Y/n L/n.” You spoke up as he started to walk away. “That’s my name.” You mumble. He turned around, wide eyed. 

“Y/n L/n eh? That’s a pretty name.” Robin teased before running off.

[kvothe-kingkiller]

looking for readers for a project

now that I dont have school to worry about I’m gonna try and get the first draft of my next thing out. last time I just uploaded the chapters online as I went but this time Ive decided to keep it to just a select few ‘alpha readers’ who will also just function as a way of motivation just to make sure I meet deadlines I set cause if I do it myself then I just ignore all deadlines. 

so if anyone wants to read each chapter as it comes out and give feedback (or not, u can also just read it) I would be very appreciative. Its probably gonna be pretty long cause I 100% have an over-writing problem with first drafts. 

the project is Young Man’s Game. It’s ish (ish) similar to kkc but about 300 times more gay and the setting is based on middle eastern, northern african, and mediterranean cultures. I’ll put a longer description under the cut.

I’m considering giving any readers, who stick through to the end and give feedback, a piece of art as a thank you. I’d do every chapter but....like I said. over-writing problem. 

anyways if you’re interested please DM or message me!  (also pls reblog)

Okay so the first chapter, which I already have finished, is going to come off as a lot more similar to kkc than the series actually is. mainly cause it’s setting up exposition and setting and I came up with the idea while smack in the middle of my kkc phase lol.

Heres a very short little blurb I wrote about it ages ago:

Odrad and Sheiro have been at war for generations. Now, in a time of tense armistice, Mila is summoned to a university to learn to control the rare ability she was born with, the ability to forge facets. Paired with a mentor, the bizarre Ardev Kallas, she must adjust to her new life as a forger. But disaster seems to loom as the nations look for any excuse to fight, and Ardev is not who he says he is. Is everything she was taught about the war a lie?

The plot for the first book at least (probably going to be at least two) is fairly...fluid. Basically just Mila trying to adjust and learn and a whole lot of ‘fuck around and find out’. It explores prejudice and corrupt governments and identity and ‘war bad’ and all sorts of fun stuff. It's very character based since I’m a character bitch but I’m doing my best to keep the plot and pacing good as well. 

Rating would be R for sure. There’s a lot of swearing, some violence/brutality but I don't tend to go for too much gore. It will have some heavy topics (child abuse, sexual assault, etc) but most of that is stuff in characters pasts so it’s more talked about among them rather than actually Described. I also don't like writing explicit sex scenes so anything along those lines is more of a fade to black situation. 

I can add any content warnings to each chapter if you wish.

Setting is fantasy with low magic. Forging is akin to bending from ATLA or naming in KKC, with a touch of sympathy cause I’m a slut for science and my magic must have rules. Like I said above, it's based on northern african, middle eastern, and mediterranean cultures. However more in aesthetic than values (basically just...warm setting, no trees, how do buildings and clothes and stuff evolve in these conditions). I do my best to be fairly original with stuff like religion and values. Very little sexism. Women and men are viewed differently but not “men are better”

Queerness: the setting does have some homophobia but that's cause I’m ghey and like writing ghey characters saying ‘fuck what u think’. But it's kinda more like Mila is from buttfuck nowhere in the bible belt (and...doesn't have access to internets) and moves to fuggin san francisco and is like O.O and also all the characters are queer. 

Lastly I do have some chapters finished. I will be using google classroom (lol yes google classroom) to distribute to ppl and get feedback. If you aren’t sure if you would like to or not I can give you just the links for the first two or so, so you can get a feel without actually being added into my ‘class’.

[hyrule-kingdom-updates]

writing question: how do you structure each arc esp in terms of the grand story? i’ve tried to write big fics before but despite my dramatic plans for the beginning and end, i only have overarching ideas for in between with no clue abt the nitty gritty. how do you turn “x should develop across the story”, “y should be foreshadowed early on” etc. into a proper series of events?

BIG SPOILERS FOR HKU UNDER THE CUT

Ok so first, pretend you are writing the shortest fic in existence. That way, you lay out ONLY the most essential features of your main plot.

Then lay out ONLY the essential details that connect these important plot points

That’s pretty much the basics of what you need to figure out before you start anything else. If you don't have that figured out yet, work on that before anything else.

So the inbetween stuff is basically how you keep the audience intrigued between these parts of the story. You can use different plot points or "twists" to create a system of highs and lows, like a wave. That way, the story is dynamic, people are interest, and it's not boring.

It’s not about being unpredictable, but you just gotta go through trial and error with finding out where to place what details when, so that you can have adequate pay off. 

Generally the rule of thumb is, the bigger the ultimate reveal, the earlier on you should lay clues and foreshadowing. Obviously try not to do it to a point where it’s too obvious, as the tool of a plot twist is mainly to get the reaction of “I SHOULD have seen that coming, but I didn’t!” instead of “I would NEVER have seen that coming!”

If you got all that, just place it in your brain for later as we add more to our little diagram.

So let’s structure where we place our “plot twists” and important beats. These have to be essential to connect your bigger plot, or developing one of your character, otherwise they’re just useless and you should cut it. I’m gonna start with the stuff that affects the plot. (Again, trying to be as simplistic as possible.)

So these beats in the story are essential to connect the main plot points, if you take them out, it doesn’t make sense. The specific cosequences for these “plot twist” are the connective glue that you wrote down earlier. For example, the consequence of Siv protecting Zelda is him solidifying his trust and love for her in that moment, thus his relationship with her develops him into a caring protagonist. The consequence of Zavis being revealed as a spy is Siv starting to question the relationships he’s made, and they start to break down over time. The consequence of the fourth tie being revealed is that it leaves the only intact and ultimately consistent relationship in Siv’s life to be Calamity canon.

Also you might notice that I redaced one of the plot twists for spoilers. BUT, I think this is a good moment to point out that you don’t necessarily need to reveal the information that your characters learn as they happen, because I think setting up forshadowing for the twist itself AFTER it happens can be pretty interesting. The reader knows that something has happened, but now the mystery of exactly WHAT it was can drive the plot further. Anyways.

You have these point, and now you have to figure out what to put inbetween. Again, you have to create highs and lows, and general your twists are your highs (points of extreme action and tension for the reader), so now we establish your lows (points of comedic relief and relaxation for the reader).

But, SURPRISE! You already did that! Your lows of the story are determined by the areas inbetween your plot twists!

Now if you don't like where your highs and lows are, that's alright, you can move stuff around, again it's a process of trial and error. But the name of the game is pacing, but that's like a WHOOOOOLE OTHER essay about how to pace things, but we're here for deciding where to put arcs so we'll just breeze by that right now.

You also might notice in my badly drawn diagram that the height of the crests of each wave are different, and you'd be right to notice that. It's because I'm assigning a sort of "value" of each plot twist, as as the writer I know how important the impact of wave one is. Generally the rule is the further along you go, the more value ro tension a point has to offer. It'll kinda look like those five act structure graphs your english teacher showed you in fifth grade.

So now FINALLY, you can get a general sense of where to have arcs in your story.

Not every arc is gonna be the same, that's just a given, but you can get a general sense of where certain arcs are based on what you made.

Maybe if you're going for a lighthearted tone, you want every arc to start on a low, and end on a low, like an episodic format. Or maybe if you're going for a tone that's more serious or myserious, you'll be more prone to end arcs on highs. You can problem guess which one I lean more towards.

Quill Boys and co arc: Start on the low of Siv and Zavis hanging out, being pals, end on the high of Zavis' reveal as the spy

A lark flies into the woods arc: low action as Siv and Astor talk, the high of Larc's decision is revealed.

Hollow knight but not that hollow knight arc: The tension continues to rise in the battle, and then a low after the battle is won, but then the high of Link's truth is revealed.

That's how I write my arcs, but sometimes depending on where I want the tone to be, I'm stretch out multiple low-high-low arcs to give the reader a break. But you'll notice as we approach closer and closer to the climax, the frequences of the waves increases, and the length of the breaks decrease. So when that happens, you might need to break your arcs in highs and lows that art part of a bigger wave, similar to how i did #a lark flies into the woods and #Hollow knight but not that hollow knight.

For another example of breaking up arcs to show part of a wave, I did #sibling fights hollow knights and destiny rewrites and #long ago and long away, with the "high" of Zelda's plan being what splits them down the middle.

AGAIN. THIS IS ALL TRIAL AND ERROR AND WILL NOT WORK FOR EVERY TYPE OF STORY. THIS WORKS FOR ME BECAUSE MY STORY IS BASED ON THE IDEA OF UNSEEN INFORMATION AND ULTIMATELY BEING "UPDATED" ABOUT IT, SO THE REVEAL OF INFORMATION PROVIDES A CONCLUSION TO AN ARC

BUT JUST ENDING AN ARC WITH A PLOT TWIST DOES NOT AUTOMATICALLY MAKE IT GOOD. TRUST ME I'VE MADE THAT MISTAKE SOMETIMES [BUT I AM ALSO STARING INTENTLY AT TV SHOWS LIKE SHERLOCK AND LIKE 60% OF DISNEY]

Now, on that final point about foreshadowing. Let's look at those values again?

So, the more impactful you see your plot twist or development, the earlier you should set it up (generally, anyways. there are exceptions)

This is an example for the Zavis, Zelda, and Fourth Tie twists. I value the fourth tie as the highest, so I establish it subtly very early. I also value Zelda's plan as pretty high, so I establish Terrako pretty early, and her reveal gives an explanation as to why she's so focus on fixing Terrako, and also explains her reaction to Zavis' reveal. Zavi's twist is important, to who he is, so I set him up right by his first introduction

Link's twist is important, but I personally wouldn't value the tension and high of it as much as Zavis'. In addition, I already have a long establish plot twist revealed with Zavis, so I think I want to surprise my audience a bit more by foreshadowing Link's tie only a few arcs before the reveal. Astor's impact is almost better if there's nearly no foreshadowing to him at all, (especially on a meta level) so I think I'll make one off hand mention to him existing and leave it at that.

I think for the most part, the more impact the event has on the development of your story/character, the earlier on you should foreshadow/hint at it.

And I breezed by a lot of shit, like I didn't even TOUCH the character related twists like Sooga and Revali. And there's shit about pacing and timing and conclusions and beginning to arcs and their relations...but I think that's a good enough starting point for your ask.

So keep your arcs dynamic do follow the highs and lows of your story. Make sure they end conclusively (cliff hangers are ok, but don't assume a plot twist in of itself is a conclusion) and foreshadow shit earlier depending on how big of a twist it is

[funkybotwstuff]

Taking hc and scenario requests

Hello, this is a new oneshot account currently split between two people! We are primarily doing Breath of the Wild oneshots right now, but we might expand later someday. We are very new to Tumblr, but we’re hoping we’ll get better at using it later.

We both prefer writing headcanons or scenarios for Revali, Sidon, or Link. However, you can request for most characters WITHIN REASON.

We have a few rules if you want to request anything, but they’re pretty self explanatory.

1. Please tell us if you want a headcanon or a scenario and what gender you want if it’s a scenario.

2. No NSFW, that’s obvious enough

3. We only write scenarios with having a gender neutral or female main character. We’re both girls and we have zero experience writing for a male lead, so it’s much easier on us.

4. Nothing weird or creepy please. This really isn’t asking for much. If we feel uncomfortable about a prompt, we’re probably just going to ignore it :(

5. We only do character x reader.

6. And if you want to send in an ask just to say hi or ask us a question, please do. We both like bug facts as well sooooo please send those as well

Yeaaah my name is Kat and I wrote the really dumb intro above, so sorry about that. Not really useful info, but I found out about BotW while eating popcorn with a friend in the back of my math class last year. My favorite characters are Revali and Mipha, and it’s not like I’m an unironic Revali simp or anything... haha.... And I definitely didn’t write over 35,000 words on a discontinued Revali/reader fic either... Anyways yeah, I hope you request smth for us! or else

What up cheese bags I’m Jared and I’m 19 and I never fucking learned how to read. Well that’s a silly notion of course I learned how to read or else I wouldn’t be writing fanfiction to fill in the empty hole in me that craves to see my comfort characters :D Ok serious now, I’ll just address myself as Ale (it would make much more sense if you knew my real name but HA NOPE) and I do enjoy writing a lot and I have some botw f a n f i c that mainly revolves around Revali (who is the best and I will stand by that). So yeah stick around for some swag fanfiction.

Anyways thank you for checking us out! Please send us a request and we’ll get to it soon :)

[the-starryknight]

Top 5 of 2020

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

I was tagged by the utterly brilliant @tackytigerfic who is a gift to this fandom <3

I’d like to tag @sitp-recs (what lists or serieses are you most proud of? :) and @onbeinganangel @thesleepiesthufflepuff @teacup-tai @julcheninred @glittering-git @fantalf @peachpety @veelawings @ladderofyears @lastontheboat @mxmaneater @erlasart @erebeus-roxy @unicorn-in-the-library @zigster-ao3 @pineau-noir @queercore-curriculum @primavera-cerezos @gallifrey1sburning -- please don’t feel pressure to do this if you’re not up for it! and however many things you’d like to share (5 or more or less) is welcome, 2020 has been a hell of a year for creators <3

Like everyone else in the world, this year has been so challenging in so many ways.  And the past months have been incredibly lonely for a great many reasons -- moving, leaving a job I’ve loved, ending a relationship to name a few.  It’s been a bit of a lonely last few months, and I feel so lucky to have had fandom to turn to -- beautiful fics to read, brilliant people to meet, and my own, newly renewed creative energies to rediscover.

It’s been a pleasure to get to create beautiful things with you all, and to indulge in all your beautiful bits of creativity, and to be part of this lovely community of people.  And that I think making this blog -- choosing to reach out and be vocal in this wonderful community, that’s probably my #1 of 2020.  

As for the fics, well, I’ve only been at it since September, so bear with me!

A Room Up There (And You In It) (59k, T) - Everything in this dear fic came from all the emotions I’ve motioned above - being lonely in a great beautiful house, seeking connection among old things, the quietness of connecting with people you can’t see... I haven’t written something this long since I was in high school, and I’m so proud of myself for finishing it, even during such a crazy time of my life.  It’s been so gratifying to get to share it with you all.

Matching Pair (4k, T) - This fic taught me that I could write creatively again, and how cool is that?  I’ve mainly written plays in the recent years, so it was exciting to write something prose again.  Though I think I can write a bit better than that (and certainly edit better than I did this fic :’) it was wonderful to get to stretch my typing fingers again).  And I got such an incredible response! I felt so loved and welcomed into the fandom.  

Lie Awake (5k, T) - It was while I was editing this piece that I really thought about my role as a ‘being a fic writer.’  Matching Pair was meant to be a one-off.  Practice writing to see if I could still do it, publish it, and move on.  Except then I participated in the lovely Drarry Discord Drabble Challenge for October, and wrote a little drabble I adored featuring a trope I love (Master of Death!Harry).  I wrote this fic, and my dear friend gryffindorhearts completely tore it apart in her beta of it (in the best of ways).  See, I’m a playwright by training and as such, I pay very little attention to the way things flow in space--the way people interact with objects and rooms and the like. Not my fault, that’s the director’s job! Except in prose... I’m also the director... Anyway, it was editing Lie Awake that made me realize that I could (and wanted to) spend the time crafting my stories, to work at the things I struggle with and improve them, for no other reason than that I can improve.  And I think that’s pretty cool, so here I am writing an entire advent fic about spaces.  Oops?

halcyon days (1.3k, T) - Gosh.  When I wrote a great deal in high school (and desperately planned to be a published author before I finished college), I could sit at my keyboard and it felt like my own consciousness had been bypassed. The words would just flow without my needing to guide them much at all, it was so intuitive.  And then I got very, very depressed.  And I lost that ease of writing.  And I thought that was the end of my being a ~creative~ as a career and as a passion.  Since then I’ve learned how to write without that spark or to create at least something even when my mind isn’t working like I’d like it to do.  But this? This fic came to me like it used to do -- I wrote it in about 45 minutes (approximately 2 sprints on the Drarry Discord).  Though I don’t think much of my writing will flow so easily in the future, it was a needed reminder that I still have that kind of spark in me. 

Thanks for reading along <3  Thank you all for creating such beautiful stuff to get us all through this awful, awful year.  Cheers to a brighter 2021. 

[lambourngb]

2020 Creator Wrap

2020 Creator Wrap: Favourite Works

Tagged by the lovely @ravens-world - that was like 23 days ago! But I wanted to have more work posted, so forgive the late response.

Rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (or so) favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought to the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

I now have 8 completed works on AO3 and 1 set of Tumblr ficlets, and I will say that this time last year when I was tagged in the meme, I had only one work. So 2020 was more successful than I imagined.

1. Last Year’s Wishes Are This Year’s Apologies -  (176,000 words) what started as a hiatus project that I wanted to have done before season 2, ended up stretching through June past the finale I believe. Missed deadlines aside, I’m very proud of it and feel it still holds up as a season 1 fix-it fic. It still gets “traffic” with hits and new bookmarks.

2. in sickness and in health (trojan horse) -  (51,000 words) the hardest thing I ever wrote, during this pandemic that will not end, secrecy of the challenge and another hiatus that lingers on day after day. However, it’s probably the tightest written story I have ever produced, where there’s really nothing that doesn’t tie into the plot or make the plot hurt more. Lots of angst, and I unknowingly let a bit of the 2020 Covid crisis color some of the details. Despite all of that, I hope the happy ending was carthatic.

3. Leave the Fire Burning (20,000 words)  - originally intended for Malex Week’s trope day, this sex pollen/lab accident/misunderstandings post-season 2 work was really just an excuse to write some explicit porn, particularly a few tropes I find hot to read.

4. This Hard Love (34,000 words) - debuted much of this during Michael Week, but the last chapter took almost 2 months to write as I juggled my big bang- but anyway, I loved tweaking canon, sprinkling some of the lines we love, and then playing out alternative scenarios. I also really wanted to do a look at Michael and his economic struggles in Roswell, particularly post-high school when he was living in truck, briefly in a shed, and then back to his truck again.

5. you give me a good reason to be heartsick again (let me down easy) with @christchex (5900 words) Writing a story set around early season 3 with Malex as being friends who talk about everything with Christi was a lot of fun. Yeah we tossed some salt about Forrest Long, but mainly we were complaining about some of the plot lines in season 2 regarding how “out” Alex was perceived to be. We laughed our way through writing this! First cowrite in way too many years. Also, somehow we left out the important kiss - but we all know that Tuesday night “date” was going to end in bed together.

Tagging: @haloud, @aewriting, @christchex, @adiwriting, @litwitlady, @el-gilliathand anyone else who wants to do this - please tag me so I can see it.

[glitterblazercalum]

got a river for a soul, and baby, you’re a boat

or:  Oh, fuck. We showed up wearing matching couples’ costumes to this party by accident and now everyone thinks we’re together.” + cashton

hello and happy halloween everyone!! giant thank u to ainslee @ashesonthefloor for putting this event together!! and for forcing me to actually get this fic done, looking it over, and generally being a major source of serotonin in my life. another huge thank u to bella @clumsyclifford for being one of my favorite people and loving frat boys enough that it made me want to write a fic about them to annoy her <3 love you both <3 

here is the link to the event masterpost bc I highly recommend checking out all of the other amazing fics: 

https://ashesonthefloor.tumblr.com/post/633534107120549888/hello-welcome-to-my-halloween-fic-event

warnings: mentions of alcohol

word count: 2,872

without further ado, please enjoy the fic I wrote mostly all last night while looping drag me down for thirteen hours straight :))

Calum doesn’t know what fuckhead came up with the idea of having a joint Halloween party for Sigma Nu and Sigma Pi this year, but he really wants to fight them. He thinks he’d probably have a lot of people on his side, considering how much Sig Nu and and Sig Pi hate each other, so he tucks the idea of interfraternity war away in his head as a contingency plan in case the party goes to shit, as joint parties with any other frat always seem to. And it’s not like it’s a one night thing, because all three days of the “Halloweekend,” as Michael refuses to stop calling it, are supposedly going to be spent with Sig Nu, one party at their own house, and two at the shithole that he assumes is the Sig Nu house, in some deranged attempt at bonding. He’ll be lucky to make it out alive, probably. 

Before college, he really never did anything of his own for Halloween, mainly used to being used as a prop or side character for his sister Mali-Koa’s elaborate costumes, or, after she’d moved out, sticking a pair of fake fangs in his mouth to hand out candy to the few kids who rang the doorbell despite his efforts to keep all the lights in the house off. Last year, as a freshman, he’d gotten roped into a group costume with some of the other Sig Pi pledges, and while his memories are...hazy at best, he vaguely remembers falling asleep in a Teletubbies onesie at the end of the night. 

This year, though, no one has tried to tell him what to dress up as, so it’s now a few hours before the first of the three parties, and Calum still has no ideas for what he should dress up as. A quick Google search for “cheap easy costumes” hadn’t really been all that helpful, so he decides to ignore the problem and take a nap until he actually has to leave. 

A few hours later, Michael barges into the room to drag him out of bed, and looks around for a few seconds before asking, “You don’t have a costume, do you?”

Calum groans, pulling himself out of bed and wracking his brain for an idea that he can plausibly bullshit in the next few seconds, because he can’t let Michael be right and have something to tease him about, so he blurts, “I’m going to be a salt shaker.” 

Michael gapes at him a bit for a few seconds before asking, “What the fuck? What kind of costume is that? What are you even going to wear for that?” 

Calum mentally kicks himself in the shin, as hard as possible, because he really hasn’t thought this through. Why couldn’t he have just said cat or cowboy or something even slightly in the realm of normal Halloween costumes? 

“Uhhh.. y’know that baseball tee I have? The one with the black sleeves and white middle?” 

“I’m pretty sure that’s in my closet, but continue.” 

“What the fuck, dude? Give it back!” 

“You haven’t noticed that it’s missing for like three weeks, I just assumed it was mine now. Tell me what the rest of the costume is,” Michael demands. 

“I’ll just tape a piece of paper with a big ‘S’ on it to the front of my shirt, and then put one of those pots with the holes on my head. Bam! Salt shaker!” Calum says, moderately impressed with his ability to pull stuff out of his ass this quickly. 

“What makes you think we even have a colander?” Michael asks, crossing his arms. 

Calum gives him a blank stare. “A what?” 

“That’s what the pots with the holes are called, you idiot.” 

“You think Harry would live anywhere that didn’t have a fully-stocked kitchen? There’s bound to be one in one of the cabinets or something.” 

“Fine. I’ll go get the shirt while you look for the colander.” Before Calum can object, suggest that he look through Michael’s closet himself and steal back any of his other clothes that have somehow wound up there, Michael’s already halfway down the hallway. 

Sighing, he trudges down the stairs towards the kitchen, where one of the seniors, Niall, is sitting with his head in his hands, dressed as a pirate. 

“Hey, dude, nice costume,” Calum offers as a greeting. “You wouldn’t happen to know where I can find a colander, would you? I know Harry—” 

“Do not talk to me about Harry right now,” Niall says, and Calum stops his search for a moment to send him a concerned look.

“What happ—” 

“That needy-ass motherfucker thinks that just because I didn’t want to do a couples’ costume with him, it means I don’t love him anymore! Never mind the fact that he literally mentioned this idea to me yesterday, well past the point where everyone finalizes their costumes.” 

Calum offers him a sympathetic look and offers, “Couples’ costumes are boring and cheesy anyways. Neither of you are missing out on anything, at least in my opinion.”

Niall lifts his head up from where he’d been repeatedly hitting it on the table to smirk at Calum and ask, “Have a lot of experience with couples’ costumes, do you?” 

Luckily, Calum has finally found the colander, so he opts to ignore the question and just leave the kitchen entirely. 

When he gets back upstairs, Michael’s in his room, unabashedly checking himself out in the mirror that’s on the back of the closet door. “Yeah, yeah, your anime character of the year looks great, now get out and let me get ready.” 

Michael scoffs, “Get ready, as if you’re even doing anything,” but moves towards the door anyway. 

Michael’s right, the costume is ridiculously easy to throw together, and two minutes later, they’re both out the door, walking across Fraternity Row to get to the Sig Nu house, where the music is already blaring and strobe lights throw red, then green, then blue shadows across everyone’s faces. On his way to the kitchen to grab a drink, he sees Niall and Harry walk into the house, holding hands and laughing together, so he assumes that their fight has blown over as quickly as all of their other fights always seem to.

He sees a few different trays of shots and decides he might as well take one to get the night started off right. After, he realizes that he probably shouldn’t grab a beer now, Mali’s rule about sticking to one color of booze for the night ringing in his head, so he settles for filling up a Solo cup with whatever glow in the dark gin concoction is in all the punch bowls. He wouldn’t put it past the Sig Nus to poison the drink on purpose, but it tastes relatively normal, so he grabs another cup for Michael and attempts to leave the kitchen, steering around the couple sloppily making out in the doorway. 

It’s harder to spot Michael than it usually is, considering that at least half the people at the party are wearing some type of wig, but Calum eventually makes his way back over to him. He’s talking to Niall and Harry, and they both offer him a smile before continuing on with the conversation. Once that reaches a lull, Niall leans closer to Calum and says, “Mate, you didn’t need to lie to me about couples’ costumes.” 

Calum has no idea what Niall is talking about, so he shakes his head and asks, “What are you talking about?” 

Niall cackles, and Harry turns to look at him adoringly before going back to talking to Michael, and Calum is more confused than ever. Niall grabs his shoulder and spins him around and points in the direction of a clump of people. “You’re salt and he’s pepper, right? That’s such an obvious couples’ costume, although you two do seem to have a bit of a disconnect on how much effort you put in. That guy really went all out. And dude, why haven’t you told us that you have a boyfriend? You know we’d want to know about that, give him the Sig Pi seal of approval and all that. Wait. Unless he’s a Sig Nu, in which case, I don’t want to know because I’d probably have to kick you out. That’s a joke, by the way.” 

Calum barely has the presence of mind to mumble, “He’s not my boyfriend,” before crossing the room to get to the guy in the hyper-realistic pepper grinder costume. 

The guy smiles as Calum approaches, and despite the costume covering most of his body, Calum can tell that he’s cute. “Why so salty?” Pepper Guy greets, the sunshiney smile still on his face. 

Calum smirks and replies, “Maybe I just need some more spice in my life.” Pepper Guy laughs, and just like everything else about him, it’s cute, and Calum wants to hear it again. “I’m Calum, by the way.”

“Ashton. Nice to meet you, man.” 

Calum leans a little closer so that it’s easier to hold a conversation over the loud music and asks, “What’s the deal with the super realistic pepper grinder costume?” 

Ashton makes a strange noise, somewhere between a laugh and a groan, and says, “I got it off some random sketchy website, but it was supposed to be a chess piece. Something clearly went wrong somewhere in production, and my friend Luke said that I might as well sharpie a “P” onto it and just go with it.” 

Calum makes a noise of agreement, mind stuck on a dumb idea. Before he can reconsider, he sends Michael a quick text that says if u’ve already taken over as dj, can u play that come grind w me song? and a few seconds later, he hears the opening notes and grins. 

“Hey, Ashton?” 

“Yeah?” Ashton replies, as realization slips across his face.

Right in time with the singer’s voice, Calum says, “Come grind with me,” and he laughingly pulls Ashton towards the makeshift dance floor. Neither of them can really dance, so it’s a mess of laughter and limbs flopping around, but Calum feels an unmistakable electricity between them too, and once the song is over, they stay for the next few, enraptured by each other. When they finally exhaust themselves with all the laughing and mock-twerking, Ashton asks Calum if he wants a refill, and when Calum nods, he grabs his hand and starts pulling him towards the kitchen. 

Once they’re there, Calum goes for another serving of the glow in the dark punch, which is steadily dimming as the glow sticks run out of light. Since that’s really the only light source in the kitchen, Calum doesn’t see Ashton until he’s turning around and Ashton is right in front of him, reaching around him for a cup. Calum’s kind of trapped with his back against the counter, Ashton’s pepper grinder costume tall enough to really block out the view of the rest of the party, and the world narrows, all of it contained in where their eyes connect, and then, after Calum has safely set his drink back on the counter, that narrow point expands just a bit to where their mouths land on each other’s. The colander gets knocked off Calum’s head as he lifts himself up to sit on the counter, wrapping his legs around Ashton’s waist to pull him closer, as close as he can possibly get him. 

Ashton’s sucking a mark into Calum’s neck when Calum has his first coherent thought of the past few minutes and pulls back, breathlessly asking “Wait, wait, you’re not a Sig Nu, are you?” fully expecting the answer to be no.

Ashton steps back a little too, and it takes him a second to register the question before he groans, “Of course you’re a fucking Sig Pi, that’s the only explanation that makes sense for me never seeing you anywhere before. You’re too hot for me to not notice otherwise.” 

Calum flushes and mentally curses out whatever idiots had started the rivalry between Sig Nu and Sig Pi before he grabs his stupid colander off the ground and gives Ashton an awkward wave goodbye.  

Once he’s out of the kitchen, he quickly glances around in search of Michael, and when he can’t immediately find him, he just gives up and leaves entirely. Fuck Sig Nu. 

He spends most of the next day bitching about his hangover, and then, a few hours later, bitching about his hangover while helping to set up the house for that night’s party. 

He doesn’t really have much more of a costume for tonight, throwing on a gray shirt and sharpie-ing some whiskers on his face. Michael takes pity on him and makes him a headband with an approximation of what they both think mouse ears are, and Calum is mildly entertained by going up to everyone and saying, “I’m a mouse, duh.” 

His heart’s really not in the right place to party tonight, which is probably breaking the cardinal rule of being in a frat, so he sticks close to Michael, who has taken over the role of DJ, once again. Zayn from Alpha Sig strolls over after about half an hour, devil horns askew, and quietly says to Calum, “Cat and mouse, huh? Didn’t think you had it in you, Hood, that’s proper cute. Not as cute as me and Lou, mind you, but still, I respect the effort.” 

Calum is reluctant to look up and see who he’s accidentally matching with today, because, with his luck, it’s probably another guy from Sig Nu. When he does eventually look up, he immediately makes eye contact with Ashton, who happens to be walking by, dressed in all black and with whiskers sharpie’d onto his face too. Calum wants to bang his head into a wall because the universe clearly hates him if it’s having him match with Ashton again. Even beyond that, Ashton looks so good out of the stupid pepper grinder and in all black that Calum wants to make out with him again. 

Ashton is clearly having similar thoughts when he gestures Calum over and leads them towards a little pocket of quiet space in one of the lesser used hallways. 

Calum really wants to hook his thumb into one of Ashton’s belt loops, so he does, as Ashton looks him up and down a few times. “Is the mouse costume your way of telling me you want me to chase you?” 

Calum murmurs, “Shut up,” before leaning in to kiss him, frat rivalry be damned. It’s just as good as it was the night before, maybe even more so, now that the pepper costume isn’t in their way. At this point, there’s no denying the chemistry. It can’t be blamed on being drunk since Calum’s been nursing the same beer all night, and the part of his brain that’s protesting against being this close to a Sig Nu is getting smaller and smaller as he and Ashton continue to kiss. 

They stay in that hallway for the rest of the night, eventually sliding down to sit on the ground, legs pressed together, sharing stupid stories about their respective frats. Calum’s surprised when the music shuts off because it feels like it’s only been an hour at most, that’s how easy it is to talk to Ashton. Ashton heaves himself up and reaches both hands down to help Calum up, too. 

“I don’t think there’s any way you can match your costume to mine tomorrow, but I’ll come find you anyways,” Ashton says, as he leaves Calum with a kiss on the cheek. 

Calum’s too wired to sleep much, so he opts to help clean up the house instead, and that takes up enough of his day that when nighttime rolls around, he’s stood staring at his closet without a costume idea for the third time in as many days. After ten minutes of consideration, he digs through one of his drawers to pull out the fake vampire fangs that he had somehow remembered to bring with him, and he goes down the hall to ask Jack to put some fake blood on his mouth and neck. Jack always goes all out for Halloween. 

Once he’s at the party, he doesn’t have to wait long to find Ashton, who looks incredibly good in his werewolf costume. There’s fake blood on him too, which is really the only way their costumes could be understood to be matching, or so Calum thinks. Tonight, Jack and Alex are the ones to tease him, “You know what, I agree. Jacob and Edward should have ended up together, Bella was boring as shit.” 

Calum’s really not bothered by the comments at all, so much so that he’s already thinking of couples’ costumes ideas for next year when he finds his way over to Ashton and whispers, “Let’s get out of here.” 

“Are you trying to make a move on me? I’m a respectable Sigma Nu, I don’t know if I can allow that.” 

 Calum laughs and tugs him out the door, “Told you I wanted some more spice in my life.” 

[andrea-lyn]

Thanks to both @aewriting​ and @el-gilliath​ for tagging me in this!

Rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (or so) favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought to the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

Caveat, I wrote a lot this year. For me, I need something to focus on and writing a little each day kept me focused on something, which is why I signed up for four big bangs, a few exchanges, and produced a fic a day for Malex week. In 2020 alone, I’ve produced over 700k+ words. It’s a lot, I know. So it’s a little difficult to decide on the top five, but here’s the ones I think I really was proud of:

1. no regrets if we walk this new road

When Max can’t bring Rosa back on that fateful night, he, Michael, and Isobel embark on a new path that leads to UNM and completely different destinies.

What they can't escape is that the more things change, the more they stay the same.

I was really proud of this one, even though it was also a lesson in pushing past a low response. It taught me to stop putting up WIPs and hoping that comments would encourage me to write the next part and instead to have a completed work ready to go and roll it out swiftly (no longer than a few days between parts). Fun fact, this story has more subscribers than comments overall. I don’t think it’s an every fandom one, just that RNM had hit a point of being such a small fandom, and my expectations were just too high. That said, I also started to appreciate each and every kudos and comment more after this. Anyway, for all the difficulty, I’m still proud of this because I like my alternate s1 take (it’s not my only one, but it’s the one that lent itself better to a full fic). 

2.  I know that we will be fine

Welcome to the system! Here, Coach will make romantic matches so it can learn about what you most desire in a relationship, through good ones and bad. Congratulations on choosing to participate, Alex Manes. Your first match is Michael Guerin. Good luck with the time you've been assigned, and don't forget, everything is leading up to your ultimate match!

This was my final Malex Week piece, which is a Black Mirror AU based on the Hang the DJ episode and it’s pretty much the one that excited me the most. I’m still so proud of what I created and feel like I was able to get in the mood of the episode. 

3.  what a tale my thoughts could tell

They're already half of one another's soul, but after the incident at Merrick's lab, suddenly Nicky and Joe have a brand new connection between them.

It’s the mind-reading Joe x Nicky that I’m stupid pleased with! I’m writing a sequel piece for it (mainly because I wanted to write about what happens when Booker finds out). I think it’s my fave of my Old Guard stuff, and it performed really well, so I’m delighted with that. 

4.  baby, you're gonna lose your own game

Andy cheats at drawing straws, Joe’s a pretty thing, Nicky’s overly possessive act isn’t really an act, and Booker’s like nectar to a bunch of young gay bees.

AKA: It’s 2015 and they’ve been hired to take out a drug runner and the best way to do that is going undercover and running a honeypot trap at the gay club.

I love a good honeypot fic, but I often feel like I don’t pull it off (there’s a Star Trek version I did that I’m still pretty meh on), so I feel like I was able to improve and do it well here! 

5.  General Knowledge

Trust Poe to give him his name, then follow it up with another that means just as much to Finn.

Finn's not sure whether it's him or Poe that likes it more when Poe calls him General.

2020 has been SO LONG that I forgot I wrote some Star Wars this year. I’m proud of this because of the sheer simplicity that my love for FinnPoe still had some legs and I was able to get this idea. 

Tagging @kaydeefalls, @werebearbearbar, @sabrinachill, @insidious-intent, @christchex @hazel-athena, @manesalex, @usbournejez

[ptitcygne]

I will put context on this. I started a fantasy story few years ago because I was bored, nothing serious then. But I got inspired and now I have a whole plot and everything. I started talking about this story with my friends, and now one of them got inspired too, and wrote something that happen about 500 years before my story. I will share (probably) both of the stories because the first one explains why in my story there is such chaos going on.

But first here is the map of my universe, and a little bit of the plot so that you understand. This is a fantasy story, mostly medieval looking, but there is technology too, like trams, cable cars (that link the floating islands to the ground). Plenty of species too, some that are common, and other that I have created (or inspired by other species already created by others).

This world is divided into nine areas, they are regions, each one of them have its own rules, laws, cultures and species.

Mendel can be considered as the main one, it has a monopoly on the economy, and it has the most diversity among the people who live there. The most important city is Albereth (Albescent City), it’s kind of like the capital of this world. I will do a specific post about this place, I have a lot to say for it.

Freyr is mostly a forest of giant trees (look alike Scots pines) inhabited by all sorts of giant species.

Eodin is mainly made up of plains and small forests, one of my characters lives there most of the time, I will detail this also in another post.

Isulnin is a desert of rock and infertile earth, the ground is deeply cracked, forming faults for kilometers. Large stone columns stand out from the ground and form like pillars. These lands are hostile because a group of witches are there, and create all kinds of particularly dangerous and resistant creatures.

Cinil is an arid desert, only populated by a few rare species including mithyrians, humanoid felines.

Zygvarys is also called the Great Golden Plains, because the grass there is tall and yellow, it looks a bit like wild wheat. It is particularly warm and the only shelters that can be found are huge trees with white trunks and leaves in the colours of autumn. This area is famous for its white stone quarries, which make up the majority of the constructions there. There are only small, simple villages, and only one large city, which gave its name to the area, Zygvarys. It lies at the level of the great white wall that separates it from Melvinil. And it is there for a good reason, the city is the last bulwark facing the threat that haunts the lands of Melvinil.

Melvinil is a land that has been eaten away for centuries by a curse cast by Orkalor during his defeat and death before the white lord, Sylfaril. His spirit still haunts the place and is responsible for the madness and evil that spreads there.

Melveril is as a whole a high plateau of rock, a cold and almost uninhabited desert, only nomadic peoples live there.

Finally, Theowyn, a mountainous and snowy area as a whole with the exception of a very special forest, called the Spirits Grounds, it will have the right to her post too.

On this map, which is incomplete, there are of course missing the cities, but also the regions further north and the cloud cities, very developed flying cities, and which are one of the most important places in the history of my friend, a people in particular lives there, the winged (we had no ideas), who are the only ones who can go there without means of transport. So I would update the map.

Thank you if you have read everything so far, this is the first time I share my work in this way so I’m not super confident about what people may think. But anyway, I don’t think I’m gonna make this a serious story, so I’m gonna share it here in case anyone’s interested. Ah and English is absolutely not my mother tongue (reverso is my best friend), so I train a little here in terms of expression, so if I say nonsense, it’s normal. I will try to publish quite often. 👍

[trophywifejimgordon]

okay so, oswald’s stupid aliases meta? oswald’s stupid aliases meta. 

after returning to gotham in 1x3, oswald fairly quickly takes on a few false titles, first when confronted by a fish mooney lackey in an alley who recognizes him as the ex umbrella boy (in a panic, he tells the man that he must be confused, his name is dmitri... yeah, no), then when trying to endear himself to don maroni (trying to claim italian heritage, he calls himself paolo), and finally, in 1x4, when introducing himself to barbara (”i’m peter. peter... humboldt.”). 

so.

of these, and i’m separating the last one into two parts, i pretty much have the least to say about dmitri. while oswald has some time off screen to think about the other names, the confrontation with the mook forces him to come up with that one on the spot, so imo it’s the least likely to have heavy significance; likely he just chose it because it’s a very slavic name to fit the very slavic accent he’s not fooling anyone with. if i were really pressed about it, i might point out that dmitri is derived from demeter, the greek goddess of the harvest (among other things). demeter is responsible for the growth of the crops, but also presides over the cycle of life and death and the sacred law; one of her titles is “law-bringer,” referring to the idea that idea that law and order formed in agricultural society. the interaction oswald has here with this mook is notable in that--before he kills the guy--oswald insists that “gotham needs him! [he is] its future!” oswald aligning himself, consciously or not, with being responsible for gotham’s fertility, its health, and most of all its structure, would not be out of character for him, and is in fact directly supported by his interactions with the man to whom he gives the fake name. 

but that’s all pretty tenuous. 

next up, paolo! this one, i had fun with. see, i had a somewhat classical education. i read the inferno. that being so, my immediate connection with the name paolo (and, indeed, the only major literary connection i could find) was to the story of paolo malatesta and francesca da rimini. they’re condemned to the second circle of hell for their lust, yadda yadda, whatever. i’m mostly just concerned with the man himself; one source (from the owlcation page on paolo and francesca) describes him as “a romantic sort, a man not really interested in the world around him.” (emphasis mine.) which is fun, because guess what oswald’s doing at the time that he gives this name? he’s almost just been hired as a dishwasher at bamonte’s, maroni’s favorite restaurant. given the job, he’s warned that he hears nothing, sees nothing, says nothing. in all likelihood, oswald gives maroni this name mainly for its obvious italian origin, attempting (successfully) to endear himself to the obviously italian don by claiming “his mother’s” italian ancestry. however, there are a lot of italian names he could have chosen from. i don’t see why his choice of this one couldn’t also be a subtle way of reaffirming that he’s following the rules set out for him. paolo malatesta’s wikipedia page (and like, wikipedia as a source, i know, i know, but) takes this a little further, recounting that paolo is traditionally portrayed as a man “not very inclined to aspirations for power.” very NOT oswald, obviously. at the same time, very appropriate for his meek act as he slowly endears himself to maroni. even spicier, though, is this: “recent investigations, however, reveal [paolo] as a young man very attentive to politics and immersed in the political intrigue of the time.” so, could this mean that his fake name is not only a reaffirmation of his lowly position, but also a very, very veiled hint that he’s more than he seems? it would feel appropriate, in this case, that the traditional interpretation of malatesta is the one that oswald is banking on to facilitate his squirm into maroni’s inner circle, while the contemporary reading is the one he actually identifies with. that’s oswald all over; in touch with the old ways, yet in a class all his own.

a little less dramatically, paolo, like the anglicized “paul,” has roots meaning “small” or “humble.” so, in more ways than one, the name can be seen as oswald bending at the knee to maroni’s apparent superiority... and beginning to bide his time.

now, peter humboldt. 

you know, i really never did like this name? i’ve watched 1x4 at least six or seven times, and it always kind of made me go :/ when he offered it, because it’s just kind of... ugly, i guess. i have to say though (while i still think it’s ugly on sound alone), i’m fully obsessed with it now. 

like i said, i’m breaking this down into two parts. my analysis of the “peter” half, as with my analysis of “dmitri,” is a little more tenuous, just because it’s a fairly plain, common name. however, the low hanging fruit is the apostle peter, and never let it be said that i don’t take the low hanging fruit. so... peter. on the surface, oswald doesn’t have a whole lot in common with the story of peter the apostle, and that kind of threw a wrench in my analysis for a while. being inclined to fit that particular square block into this particular round hole, though, i got there. don’t worry, y’all. my penchant for bullshit knows no bounds.

first thing’s first, it bears note that “peter” was an alias of sorts for the apostle, too, since his given name was simon/simeon. he was jesus’s first disciple, and went from that to eventually heading up the church after the crucifixion and all following, becoming the “first pope.” such an ascension is a little reminiscent of oswald’s from umbrella boy to the head of the gotham underworld, i guess. and that’s cool. But We Can Go Deeper. i think it’s always kind of useful to keep in mind who the alias is for at the time; who oswald is trying to fool. in this case, the recipient of his bullshit is barbara kean, with an audience of an already in-the-know jim gordon. before his ascension, and furthermore, before either of them joined with christ, peter was already affiliated with a few other disciples: andrew (his brother), john, and james. (neither here nor there, but st. james was the first of the disciples to be martyred. jim...) peter and james--and the others, but i’m talking about peter and james--worked together; they were fishermen. in light of his audience, i think that it’s not entirely inconceivable that oswald is affirming his pre-ascent connection to james gordon (who he does exclusively refer to as james for the duration of the scene, rather than the ‘jim’ we get a lot more later on). not to mention, you know, the whole nautical theme. it’s not a particularly inspired link, but it does kind of work for him. additionally, while i still admit this is not the strongest meta i’ve ever written, oz choosing this name for these reasons would pair nicely with a running theme later in the season (that gets more or less dropped off by season 2, disappointingly), wherein oswald is repeatedly implied to have at least a tenuous christian background and some possible lingering expression of faith... think about the season finale, when falcone tells him he’ll burn in hell and oswald is momentarily taken aback, admitting, “i do worry about that.” 

(while i’m on this particular bullshit, one other thing that peter is known for is denying jesus three times after his death, but ultimately being forgiven and heading jesus’s church anyway. because i am a lover of Increasingly Tenuous Connections, i kind of see this as foreshadowing of the twist in 1x7. oswald’s protests to fish in the pilot that he would never betray her are reminiscent of peter’s insistence that even if every other disciple renounced jesus, he would not. naturally, he did betray her, and implicitly falcone through her. he continues renouncing his falcone ties, first by secretly joining maroni and then by openly joining maroni and threatening to spark a gang war... but at the end of it all, we learn that his “loyalties” (such as they are) never actually changed--he’s still falcone’s man. just. idk. idk. i’m Thinking About It.) 

aaaaand, finally, humboldt. 

so :) 

this is the part that i honestly wrote this whole thing to explore. because the thing is? i looooooove that he chose the name humboldt, now that i feel like i know why he chose it. i still think it sounds like a stupid name, but the subtext? the implications? UGH! 

right off the bat, my first impression was just that it sounds like the word “humble,” which goes back to the thing with paolo. neat enough. but, this name isn’t given to don maroni--it’s given to barbara. and remember, that’s important. so, what does humboldt mean, other than that? well, the one person with that name famous enough to bear mentioning is apparently alexander von humboldt. i’m certain that the name is, one way or another, a reference to him... and i’ll get to why in a second. he was a prussian (so, eastern european--check) polymath, as well as a naturalist, romantic philosopher, explorer, etc, and raised mainly by a single mother to boot. not all of his hats are directly related to oswald’s interests and skillsets, i’ll grant you, but the fact that he was a naturalist does have direct implications for why i think oswald choosing this name was a deliberate reference to this person by the writers of the show, because see, the thing is, there were quite a few animals named after him... including Spheniscus humboldti.

the humboldt penguin.

given that it’s gotham, i do have to acknowledge the possibility (probability) that that’s as deep as it goes. the writers were looking for a clever way to slip another penguin reference in there (they’re not. exactly. subtle, especially in season one, with the way that the characters are going to turn out), they looked up breeds of penguins, found this one, that’s it. but, on the other hand, there are other breeds of penguins that they could have chosen, and they chose this one. whether it was deliberate or only an accident, the decision was made, and i am running with it. 

because, like, another fun thing about humboldt: he was gay. 

(side note 2: you know tfw you’re on someone’s wikipedia page and there’s a ton of information about them and their life and their contributions to science but you’re like outta my way i ONLY want to know this man’s sexuality? ah, the personal life tab. where would we be without you.)

well, it’s one of those situations where you have to decide if you’re going to try to ascribe modern sexuality labels to historical figures, and at the end of the day, i won’t really get into it. however, though there is some scholarly discourse that cites him as a largely asexual figure (and while i’m definitely not getting into it and do not intend this as an attack on the asexual community in any way, i have to say an obviously gay man being desexualized to make him more palatable feels... familiar), the facts seem undeniable that he experienced same-sex attraction, whether or not you want to define this as exclusive. it is speculated that he had notable affairs with or at least vehement attraction toward wilhelm gabriel wegener, reinhardt von haeften, françois arago, and possibly his valet seifret, among others. maybe gotham writers didn’t intend for this little throwaway alias to be read as an announcement of oswald’s sexuality (although, even if “humboldt” wasn’t, the exchange he has with barbara--“i never get to meet any of jim’s friends, because he doesn’t tell me anything” “men.” “don’t i know!”--sure was... something), but as i am not a coward, i am perfectly content to read it as one anyway. and don’t forget what i said--this is the alias he gives to barbara. barbara, about whom he knows a possibly suspicious amount, given that she’s almost irrelevant to his political schemes. barbara, whose apartment he went to for jim gordon. barbara, who is, perhaps, his perceived romantic rival. 

look, it’s probably just a name and a penguin joke. but what’s the point of metatextual analysis if you can’t be like “he showed up and told barb his name was peter humboldt because he wanted to affirm that his origins are tied to saint jim’s and let it be known that the two of them are in competition for jim’s attention all in the most dramatic way possible and while smugly congratulating himself on being so clever and subtle”?? this isn’t really a threat--in contrast to how creepy he is with women he is threatening, namely fish and liza, oswald is downright courteous to barbara--so much as it is an indulgent expression of petty jealousy. i think he wants jim but perhaps doesn’t even realize the extent or in which way yet; he just wants barbara to know, on some level, that she’s sharing, and jim to know (because jim is just as much an audience to his performance here, and he knows that the alias is fake, might be driven to consider, with that detective brain of his, why he chose what he chose...), on some level, that they’re tied. 

oof. ok. that was a lot, but one last thing. since i’m already indulging in gratuitous oswald parallels with humboldt anyway, i might as well point out this line from a letter he wrote to reinhardt von haeften, after von haeften’s engagement to a woman: “Even if you must refuse me, treat me coldly with disdain, I should still want to be with you... the love I have for you is not just friendship or brotherly love, it is veneration.”

i’m on my bullshit, but... you can hear it in his voice, right?