#anyways i love this picture so much. getting all emotional for no good reason

[moonchild-in-blue]

went outside to let one of my kitties play in the snow while the train was passing, the neighborhood was very peaceful and quiet. 💚

(i dressed appropriately for the cold, I promise)

Like street lamps, we glow so dim Like four walls, you've shut me in

I took a while to reply to this because I got weirdly emotional (what a surprise, pathetic wet cat girl is crying again), and rambled waay too much, so I'll spare you all and keep this under a cut.

Warning, this is Long and makes very little sense - I drafted it earlier this morning but wanted to get a picture of that ^ before posting. Also ignore my mistake lol, I should've double checked the lyrics beforehand.

You, know I spent a very long time last night looking at this picture. Something about the orange glow on the white layer of snow that is just... so peaceful and melancholic. I have a weird attraction to street lights - can't really explain why, but something about them makes me weirdly emotional (when I say I easily cry at the weirdest things, I'm not kidding in the slightest).

And then the snow.

Where I'm from, where I live, we don't have snow. Ever. Save for a small part of the very north of the country, the rest of us never get it - plenty of hail, and 5 minutes of barely-snow during a particularly cold day if you're extremely lucky, but never the real deal.

The first time I saw real, white, fluffy snow was during the autumn of 2016, right after moving to the UK for my studies. I was 19. It was such a beautiful moment - me and a bunch of other students from the dorms went out in our pjs at like, 4 or 5am to play in the snow. The first heavy snow I experienced was 2 years later, November 2018.

For the few years I lived there, I got to live through some wonderful snow days. It was amazing to wake up, look out my apartment window, and see the whole street covered in white. It's the one thing I genuinely miss about the UK.

Seeing this picture, the cars covered in white, the golden orange light, the night, dark and silent and peaceful, brought back so many memories of my early 20s nights. Getting home at 1am, exhausted and on the verge of tears, after a shitty shift at work. Me and my flatmates singing on the streets after one too many drinks at our favourite pub. 3am runs to the dingiest takeaway possible for oily chips and disgusting pizza.

So much of these seemingly ordinarily experiences are things that I will never get to live again. And that's fine and expected - I can't be 22 forever, and thank God I'm not! But I do get nostalgic about those times.

Sometimes I feel like it was just yesterday that I was waiting on the cold for a taxi after a house party, annoyed at myself for not kissing the guy I had a crush on. Sometimes they feel so distance, like forgotten memories belonging to someone else. And I don't know, this kinda brought back so many emotions, I had to take a moment to sort them out.

This also reminded me of a Midwest Emo album cover. Like, I can 100% see this picture on the next Real Friends / The Wonder Years / American Football / whatever band cover.

In particular, it reminded me of these two songs (aside from that first song I shared. Which btw I can't reccomend them enough). They're a bit sad (no surprises there), and not really related to your photo at all, but uhhhh yeah. I'm sharing anyways. Because why not.

Something about midwest emo/pop-punk bands that just puts you in a hyper contemplative mood 👍

If you read this whole nonsense ramble, I apologise. Once I get sentimental, it's hard not to pour over. I will never not be a sad emo girl, no matter how much time it passes lol 💙💚

Here's a nice cookie for your troubles 🤲🍪

[itspileofgoodthings]

in the most concrete way yet I feel like I’m getting a handle on what my flaws and weaknesses actually are lol.

[schisms]

darker waves was. THE BEST!!!!!!!!!

[landopoet]

taciturnity.

pairing coworker!lando x intern!reader

warnings mentions of sex, use of vulgar language

synopsis a date in italy sounds like a dream. what could go wrong?

taglist @sheblogs @n3versatisfied @number-0-iz @gigicisneros @urfavnoirette

find part one here: clandestine

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

It’s a quarter to six when the plane lands. 

You and Lando had been texting about the date so much that it began to feel like it’s the only reason you’re in Italy. It’s only when you get an email from your supervisor, instructing you of all that you need to do over the weekend, that you get out of your little love-coloured bubble.

It’s Thursday evening, media day, and arguably one of the most busy days of a race weekend. Your supervisor let you know that their official photographer would be taking pictures today, so you could get settled in at the hotel and prepare for tomorrow. Which is incredibly fortunate, as you have to prepare all your camera settings, charge the batteries, bring your laptop hard drive and adaptors. 

Stress would be overtaking all your emotions if you weren’t so excited to see Lando on Saturday. 

You can already imagine it— the white button-up, the flowers in his hands, the candlelight on his face and the glare of his eyes as they burn into yours. It’s nothing short of magical, the way you imagine your first date, and you’re sure it’ll be even better in reality.

That night, it takes you far longer to fall asleep than anticipated. You know you should be asleep, resting up before the following day as you had to take pictures of Lando on the paddock and on track. It’ll be your first time working with fast-moving subjects, but you’re sure you’ll get the hang of it quickly. 

Besides, it’s not like you’re here on full pay, anyway. Even if you don’t get good shots, you’ll be gaining experience and Eliza has nothing she can do but advise you to do better.

The sunlight filters through the hotel curtains and you rub your eyes awake, glancing at the alarm with blurry vision. It’s about fifteen minutes before you were supposed to wake up, so you take that as a chance to check your social media apps and contact friends. 

In the flurry of notifications on your screen, one stands out more than others— lando followed you from Instagram. A small smile creeps its way onto your face and you click the bright blue follow back button. 

You slip out of bed roughly five minutes after, having spent that time looking through his posts and finding his photography account, which he failed to mention before.

The tile floors in the bathroom distract you from thoughts of him and you zone back into your reality— it’s Friday and there’s work to do, and you’re not just here for matters of love. 

Lexi calls you just as you’re about to tug on your shoes. “Heya,” she cheerily says, her smile evident in her voice. “You up yet?” 

A small scoff leaves your lips as you press your phone to your shoulder with your cheek, using both hands to tie your shoe. “Bold of you to assume I wasn’t up before my alarm.” 

“Ugh, of course you were.” she fakes disgust. “Anyway, Eliza asked to meet her in the foyer so just come down when you’re ready. And manifest that you run into Lando in the elevator.” 

You roll your eyes, playfully, even though she can’t see it. “I’ll manifest that I won’t. Bye.” 

Down in the foyer, Eliza gives you a brief rundown of your tasks for the weekend. Lexi’s ones are obviously more complicated than yours, but you feel intimidated by the amount of work you’ve been given.

You have to upload pictures from Lexi’s SD cards to your laptop, edit them and get them ready to post as soon as they’re done, as well as email them all back to Eliza and snap pictures whenever you can (Eliza said you could keep those to yourself, as she’s not convinced you’re as good as you let on.) 

Lexi gives you a look and you read it as “she's such a bitch”. To which you can’t help but agree.

                                     ── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

The paddock is as busy as you’d imagined.

The buzzing of people trying to get to wherever they were going made your head spin but it felt so great at the same time. You’ve dreamed of an opportunity to be at such a large event, more so as a guest and not staff, but this’ll do for now. 

Your eyes scan the crowd of people as you’re walking towards the garage and you can see everyone, except the one person you’re looking for. 

As if on cue, you feel two hands on your shoulders. “Looking for me?” The curly haired man can’t help but point and laugh at the way you gasp and clutch your chest.

“You can’t just sneak up on people like that, Lando,” he shields his head as you gently slap at his arm. “And, no, I wasn’t. I was admiring the scenery.” 

“Scenery, right…” He takes a look ahead, seeing nothing but the back of heads. “Beautiful, Italian heads, truly a sight to see.” 

“Why aren’t you in your car? I thought you’d be out on the track by now.” You looked up at him, noticing how tightly the race suit hugged his neck, making his adams apple pop even more. 

He swallows and you watch as it rises and falls, mesmerising you. “There was some trouble with it, but it should be fixed before quali,” he explained. “I just popped down to my driver room for a quick break from the people.” 

“Break from the people or to stalk me?” 

Lando clicks his tongue. “Ah, fuck, you figured me out again.” He watches as you try to hide your smile behind an eye roll. “I’ll get going before they start to miss me. See you later.” 

The man sends a wink your way before he disappears into the crowd of beautiful, Italian heads.

                                   ── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

It was infuriating, really. 

Lando wasn’t a jealous person. He didn’t think of himself as such, anyway, nor did he notice ever feeling that sharp pang of slight hurt before. All it took was to see you and Daniel talking for him to finally experience it sharp enough that he’ll remember. 

It’s been about twenty minutes of you giggling at the Australian man’s jokes, him flashing you a smile as often as he breathed. Lando rolled his eyes for the millionth time. Daniel wasn’t really that funny, so there was no reason for you to be smiling at him so much. 

It should be Lando you’re giggling at. 

And he knows he could just walk up there, insert himself into your conversation, but what good would that do? He only just got you to go on a date with him and him being jealous would only hinder the chances of it actually happening. 

Even though he knows it will. You were so excited about it on text that Lando was sure you wouldn’t miss it. He even got to pick out your outfit, as he swore not to tell you a thing about the place you’ll be meeting him. 

Still, the worry of some unfunny, poor driving racer like Daniel taking you away from Lando lingered. 

“You alright, mate?” One of the engineers in the garage nudged Lando’s shoulder and the Brit swiftly nodded, eyes still glued to the way your face lit up at another one of Daniel’s remarks. Stupid. 

“I’m trying to focus up for quali. Is the car good to go?” He finally peeled his eyes away from the sickening scene in front of him to look at the engineer. 

“Yeah, it wasn’t wrecked too badly so we’re only doing some final checks. Should be good to go in an hour.” 

Lando nodded, turning his eyes back to you again. This time he failed to hide the scowl forming on his face— Daniel’s hand was on your bicep as he pointed towards the track, evidently explaining something. 

You can show her without touching her, dumbass. Lando thought, eyebrows set so low on his face that they might as well be a moustache. 

It was stupid to even think in such a way, as you were nothing but friends. For now. Lando knew you’d be a tough shell to crack but he feels it in his guts that you’ll, one day, be his. 

He’s been enamored by you ever since meeting you. The way your dress sat on your body, perfectly fitting in all the right places; the way your hair laid against your back and shoulders, waves so deep he was ready to drown in them. Lando was never one to fall for one so quickly, but with you it felt just right. 

And when you invited him home, fuck was he done for. He couldn’t have ever imagined the sounds that escaped your mouth when his hands dipped beneath your panties or the way you’d look rolling your hips against his, lips parted and, oh, so inviting.

One night stands were his usual routine. It was easy— he’d meet a girl, fuck her, she’d be on the same page as him and they’d never talk again. But with you, he changed his opinion quickly. Just after that one night he spent with you, he couldn’t bear to even think of another woman. 

Lando was one lucky bastard that he worked for the same company you had interned for. Fortunately for the Brit, life put you two in each other's path when you were so clear about not wanting to see him again. He took it as a sign to make you his, no matter what it takes.

He never expected you to reject him that much, though. At one point, Lando was beginning to lose hope and feared that it was just a waste of his energy to even try and get close with you. That was until he caught Lexi in the elevator, a few hours after you had gone home for the day.

The girl, who was more like a friend to Lando than a coworker, told him how you didn’t actually dislike him. Of course, he took that as a huge ego boost and it only heightened his confidence that you were into him, too. Maybe not as much as he’s into you, but it’s enough for him to try and make it work.

He just never expected to fall in love with you so quickly and only realise it when you were talking to an ex-teammate of his.

So, maybe it was justified for Lando to feel jealous. Afterall, it’s not everyday he falls in love with a girl from the bar.

                                      ── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

Max: I’m sure she’ll be there, mate.

Lando glances at the message that flashes across his screen, hoping it’s from you, but he’s quite disappointed to see that it’s from his best friend. It’s been ten minutes since Lando arrived at the restaurant, and although the time you agreed to meet was in five minutes, he can’t shake the feeling of something being wrong. 

Though he’s sure you’re just navigating your way through the city. Lando understands the struggle, he was just the same when he first visited. But now, after coming here for six years, he feels like he knows his way around the place. 

Lando can only imagine how cute you are when confused— eyes reading Google Maps from your phone as you bite down your bottom lip, slightly puffing them like you usually do when focusing. If he’s being honest, Lando has stared at you for long enough to notice the small habits, and pick up on them, too. 

For example, you tap your fingers against any surface whenever you’re even the tiniest bit anxious. You also bounce your knee and do this thing with your eyebrows that Lando can’t get enough of. There’s so much to you that he hasn’t even learnt about yet, and it only makes him that much more excited to get to know you further.

Lando catches himself bouncing his knee and tapping the table when the twenty minute mark rolls around.

It’s been twenty minutes since you agreed to meet up at the restaurant that Lando set a special reservation for, in a secluded area hidden from the public eye. That’s the reason he didn’t just pick you up from the hotel. Sure, it’d be the gentlemanly thing to do but neither of you wanted the news of your blossoming romance to hit the headlines just yet.

“Would you like to order anything while you wait, sir?” A waiter asks, notebook and pen ready to write as he expectedly tilts his head to the side. Lando glances over at him, catching a glimpse of someone who looks like you, in the far distance. 

It takes him less than three seconds to notice how the girl's hair isn’t as long as yours, how the shade of her skin is just a tad off from yours and how her face, even from so far away, resembles nothing of the features he had grown to adore. 

He glances back at the waiter. “Uh, no, thank you. My date will be here soon.”

The waiter nods and scurries off to another table, leaving Lando in the company of none other than himself, the candlelight and the bouquet of flowers he had left on the chair opposite of him. It was a bouquet of red roses. You had mentioned those being your favourite briefly during your conversation at the bar, and Lando couldn’t help himself and bought the biggest bouquet he could find. 

One hundred and fifty roses is enough, he reckons. Or not. Surely not. You deserve way more than measly roses, wrapped in a beige paper that made Lando feel uneasy the more he looked at it. It was either that or the fact that it’s been forty five minutes since he last checked the time. 

It’s been an hour and you haven’t shown up.

Lando’s not one to get mad easily. Hell, he’s never actually been mad at you nor could he ever be. What he was feeling was a lot closer to betrayal than anger.

First it was you getting cozy with Daniel— sitting on two chairs in the McLaren garage, knees touching and laughs echoing so loud it made Lando’s head hurt— and now this. 

He could think of a million reasons as to why you didn’t show up, but the fact is that you stood him up, and that’s not something he’s sure he can easily forgive. 

The waiter rounds Lando’s table again, only to find some cash to pay for the champagne he had ordered and the sad bouquet of roses sat on the chair. 

                                      ── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

Time management isn’t really that hard when you think about it.

You had always struggled with doing your tasks on time, whether it be homework, university assignments or work related matters— it seemed impossible for you to get shit done on time. You were notoriously known as being late for everything, all the time.

Friday evening seemed to prove you different. You had managed to edit, compile and send out the photographs from both practice sessions before nine p.m., as well as edit your own photographs and review them with Lexi until eleven, meaning that you actually managed to go to sleep on time. 

Which meant that you’re at the paddock bright and early, helping Lexi prepare the cameras and other knick-knacks that you weren’t paying much attention to. Your brunette coworker nudged your shoulder, head nodding towards a particular curly-haired racer that just stepped into the area. You couldn’t deny that the race suit made him look particularly attractive, so you took your time to soak it all in.

He happened to be walking towards the two of you and when he was close enough, both of you smiled and said, “hi, Lando!”

The man nodded at Lexi, eyes not darting to stare at you like they usually would. “Have you got the pictures ready? I want to post some to my Instagram, if that’s okay.”

Lando knows that it’s you who edits the pictures, compiles and sends them out. He got the email an hour after making it back to his hotel after you stood him up. Yet he had no intention to even speak to you, when you made it so clear that humiliating him was your priority.

“Uhm, yeah. Y/N should’ve sent you the email, did she not?” Lexi tilts her head to the side, watching the man make no effort to answer her, so she turns to you. “Did you not?”

“I did, I made sure to send that one first.” You explained, so incredibly confused by why Lando was acting this way. “You should double-check your email, Lan.”

“I’ll see you around, Lex.” Is all he says before making his way across the garage and towards the Ferrari one, possibly to talk to Carlos. Lando introduced you two the evening prior and you noticed how close the two were, finding it sweet how many people Lando was friends with across the grid.

Lexi turns her eyes back to you, eyebrows knitted together and face contorted into a confused grimace. “What was that about?”

Your eyes still expectedly look towards where Lando walked off to. “It’s like I wasn’t even here.”

For the next few hours, you try your best to trace back your steps and figure out what the hell you had done to make Lando so rude to you. The only thing you’d understand is maybe not texting him last night to check in, but he knows you were busy and you made sure to tell him multiple times that you couldn’t come hang out. Still, that doesn’t seem like something he’d mind.

“Earth to Y/N?” Daniel waves his hand in front of you. 

You suddenly zone back into reality and notice the aussie next to you. “Oh, sorry. Hi, Daniel.”

“Heya, you okay? You’ve been staring at him for a while now,” he laughs, teasing you about your little crush on Lando. You regret telling him all about it yesterday and just roll your eyes.

“I don’t know.” You answer, honestly. “He’s acting like I don’t exist, but at the same time he’s acknowledging me because he covers his face every time he notices my camera focusing on him, and this morning he just fully ignored me in front of Lexi.”

“Okay, let’s calm down.” He places a reassuring arm on your back. Lando, of course, notices and the scowl on his face deepens. “I could go talk to him, maybe something personal happened. You never know.”

Daniel watches as you nod and then lets go of you, swiftly walking towards the McLaren driver standing at the pitwall. He approaches Lando carefully, trying his best not to upset his ex-teammate further. “Hey, Lando. How’s it going?”

Lando glances at Daniel with a look that would’ve killed you if you were in the aussie’s place. “Fine.”

“Oookay…” Daniel pulls his lips into a tight line. “I, uh, noticed the new intern you’ve got.”

“Noticed.” Lando scoffs. “You’ve been eye-fucking her since yesterday.”

“What?”

The Brit waves a hand in the air. “Nothing. Did she send you to speak to me?”

You anxiously watch the two men speak, noticing how alarmed Daniel looks and how Lando hasn’t stopped frowning since morning. That cannot be good for his wrinkles. Daniel says a few more things, his face changing to the exact same frown as you see on Lando’s face. 

When the aussie comes back, you open your mouth to speak but he cuts you off. “Do you travel a lot?”

The question takes you aback. “Excuse me?”

“I’ll take that as a no,” he continues. “What day do you think it is today?”

“Uh,” you shrug. “Saturday? I don’t-”

“Yesterday was Saturday, Y/N.” Just as the words leave Daniel’s lips, you feel your heart drop to your heels. The realisation of what you did hits you as soon as the aussie says it. “You stood him up.”

Your eyes instantly flicker towards Lando, who’s looking at you with nothing but hurt on his face. Fuck.

                                      ── ⟢ ・⸝⸝

Lando did not feel like talking to anyone after the race. Sure, he won it, but it didn’t feel much like a win without you there to celebrate. So when Lexi told him there’d be a meeting, he scoffed and got off the couch in his driver's room. He made his way through the building, shoulders slumped and eyes focused on his phone. 

Last thing he needed right now was some bullshit meeting about you. 

Lexi told him she needed to talk to him, fill out some documents about your internship and she needed him to write a review of how it’s been working with you. To Lando, it sounded like a load of crap but he had nothing better to do, and maybe he could write a review so bad that you don’t get to work with him anymore.

“I don’t have all day,” Lando’s voice echoes in the mostly empty room, the only company in the small space being… you. He rolls his eyes, “Where’s Lexi? I’ve a meeting with her.”

“I have a meeting with her.” You furrow your brows, evidently confused and slightly petrified of the tone in his voice. It’s only been a day so you don’t expect him to have forgiven you, but he could at least stop acting like he cared enough about you to be upset for so long. 

It didn’t seem like a big deal to you that you missed the date, because you thought it was just Lando’s way to get into your pants again. You weren’t opposed to it, but for him to get so upset about not getting to fuck you on Saturday seems a little extensive. 

Lando takes a seat at the table, not sparing another word to you until the door opens again and in comes Lexi. 

“Oh, good! Both of you are here.” The two of you glance at her, confused by what she’s up to. She picks up the keys for the room from the table and steps back out, only peeping her head in to say, “I’ll be locking you two in here so figure out whatever the hell is wrong before I do it for you. And please don’t break anything.” 

“What, Lex-“ Lando stands up to try and reason with the woman, but the door is already locked. He runs a hand over his face and groans. “Fucking hell.” 

You sit in silence, eyes following his figure. From the way he stands, you can see the way his McLaren uniform hugs his shoulders and how his hair has grown a little more– since the last time you remembered seeing it– into a sort of mullet. 

The man sits back down, turning his chair away from you so he doesn’t have to bear seeing you looking at him dumbfounded again. It’s taking everything in him not to rip that door off its hinges and leave the room.

“Lando,” you speak first, breaking the silence you were sure would last forever with no intervention. You test the water by just saying his name and when he doesn’t answer, you roll your eyes, “don’t you think this is a little silly?”

That’s what gets him to turn around. “What?” 

“This,” you wave a hand over him. “Your whole i’m so angry i didn’t get laid act. It’s stupid.” 

Lando’s speechless. There’s no way you think that low of him, right? Surely you’d assume he was even a little genuine when planning a date with you. He’s not even sure what to say to that, all he feels like doing is going back to his hotel room and forgetting everything that just happened.

Instead, he’s stuck in this room with you for an unknown amount of time and god knows what else you think of him that you’d find fitting to say. Lando chooses to find comfort in staring at the wall, since the data here is as shit as his mood. He can feel your eyes boring into him and he’s not sure if he likes it anymore– usually, he’d do anything to get your attention. Now that you’ve expressed that you see him as some sort of whore, he’s not so fond of it.

“It’s not an act.” Lando mumbles after a prolonged silence. Your eyes shoot up to his green ones and the sheer sight of his face sends shivers of anger, or maybe irony, down your spine. 

There’s no other reason as for why he’d be so upset about you missing the date. You’ve seen your fair share of pussy-hungry men, Lando among them, and his reaction really isn’t anything short of fitting. But you at least expected some understanding from him, as you both work at the same place and he knows your schedule as well as his own.

You admit, what you did was fucked up. But would you undo it if you could? The answer is: highly unlikely. Knowing his current reaction, you regret even letting him buy you a drink, let alone allowing him into your home.

After another moment of silence, you sigh and look back at him. “Look, Lando. I know a quick fuck is always fun, but-”

“Quick fuck?” He asks, disbelief staining even the most subtle tones in his voice. “Is that what you think I want from you?”

“Is it not?” You seethed in frustration. “If it’s not, then why the hell have you been so rude to me recently? What have I done that’s so terrible? I know I stood you up, and I apologise, but if it’s not about a quick fuck, then what is it?”

Lando feels his heart beating in his chest so hard that it might leap out of his ribcage and into your hands, and you’d finally realise that the beating of his heart resembles the subtle soundwaves of your laughter. Maybe you’d realise something he hasn’t quite been able to accept yet.

It’s another beat of silence with Lando’s eyes down at the ground, a look of something you couldn’t quite read plastered on his face, and you glaring at him with fire behind your pupils.

“See? You have nothing to say, because it’s true.” You scoff, crossing your arms over your chest. “I’m not some random chick you can pick up and play with whenever you so please, Lando. I have feelings and priorities, and a job that I really fucking-”

“I love you.” 

“-love, wait what?” You glanced at Lando, thoughts suddenly jumbled by what he had said.

A veiny hand comes up to pinch the bridge of his nose, either to hide his embarrassment or out of frustration. “I don’t know how it happened, but all I know is that every fucking day, I wake up and I’m checking my phone in hopes of seeing your name.” He decides to look out the window when he finally removes his fingers from his eyes, trying his best to ignore how intently your eyes are burning into him. “It feels pathetic to admit that I’ve caught feelings, especially since you see me as a heartless prick who fucks and dumps girls regularly.”

A sarcastic chuckle leaves his lips and you feel your whole body run cold.

You watch his chest rise and fall, a vein in his neck growing more evident as his heartbeat quickens. “It’s never been about the sex, Y/N. I’ve wanted you since the second I laid my eyes on you. Is it that hard to try and imagine that I’d actually feel something for you?” Your heart drops when he finally turns to you. The rage in his eyes can’t compare to the sinking feeling in your stomach. 

Lando hears the door lock click but it stays closed, and he takes it as a sign to finally leave. You rise to follow him and when he’s at the door, he harshly turns to you. “Don’t bother. I don’t want to see you ever again.”

[leoascendente]

PAC/ Your destined person 💘

Hi loves and welcome to this new PAC! I'll be taking a time from this blog to focus on another projects, it doesn't mean that this blog will be unactive, it is just that I won't post that much pacs or astrology, I'll be more focused in my Spanish blog for a while. Anyway, private readings will still be open and from time to time I'll post something over here because Tumblr is and always will be my safe place.

Take a deep breath before choosig your pile and pick the picture you feel called the most, because this is a general reading it doesn't have to fully resonate, keep what does and leave what doesn't for somebody else, you can always choose another pile :)

For private readings click here

My blog in Spanish here

Decks: Romantic tarot, dark wood tarot, tea leafs oracle, romance angels oracle, love oracle cards

All pics are from pinterest, credits to their owners

Pile 1/ Pile 2

Pile 3/ Pile 4

Pile 1:

Who is your destined person?:

(Cards: 6 of swords, 3 of pentacles, 6 of pentacles, moon, hermit, queen of wands, king of swords/ hermit rev, death, wheel of fortune, 5 of pentacles, sun)

This person probably comes from a very different backgroud than you, it will seem like you don't have much in common at first, they have probably moved from the place they were born and are getting used to the new place. They are a hard worker, right now they are putting a lot of effort in this area of their life, probably to help financially their beloved ones, I'm hearing to help their parents, they are so focused in making money that they are not nurturing other aspects of their life like socializing, the good thing is that they don't seem to care about it. They got the hermit with two different decks, once upright and another time on reversed, it gives me the feeling that they feel very comfortable in their solitude but at the same time they are craving significative connections and a reason to get out of their isolation, for some reason they feel very exhausted but they can't sleep at night, they are like an owl, by night they seem to be more active even though they should be super tired because their work is exhausting (I'm writting this at 13:31 on my clock, maybe it's a relevant number for you or this connection). This person has some emotional issues that keeps them up at night, it's like they need these few extra hours of the day that they are taking from their resting time to relax when the rest of the world is quiet, maybe it's because they are far from home or because they miss their family, because this is related to their emotional world but for what I see here they are thinking too much about others and not about themselves and their mental peace. Anyway, this person is really attractive, for what I see in the cards, they have some not-so-secret admirers that are chasing them or looking desperately for their attention, whatever they are trying is not working with your person, your person seems to be an introvert or at least, they need to feel emotionally connected to something or someone to invest their energy fully on it, I could even say that they are a little shy when it comes to interact with other people. this person has an strong masculine energy, also I keep hearing the word resilient so this may be the most noticable trait about them, the thing here with the admirers is that they are chasing your person, like taking the masculine role but only for their outside appearance, your person seems to need something more to connect with someone and they prefer to court that to be courted. Right now they are closing chapters, there's a massive divine intervention in their life even if they are not aware of this, this is happening for their highest good because they need to get out of this hermit mode and start experiencing good things. They seem to be a little apathic and their lack of rest could be affecting their health too, even if they want it or not, a change is coming to align them, there will be a shift in their luck very soon, especially to help them financially because they seem to be struggling in this aspect. your person is really calmed and peaceful, very goal oriented and commited to what's important to them, you'll love the kind of person they are and the peace they'll bring to your life.

Your connection:

(Cards: deception, new love, this could be the one, playfulness/ girl with a snake, heartbroken, the phoenix, heart with a key, wedding rings)

Okay, your person had a very tough relationship with a toxic person that played with their heart and left them in the dust, this might be one of the reasons why they are avoiding so much human contact, especially with romantic interests, their heart is still recovering from this heartbreak. When you appear in their life, everything will trasform, it will be so magical and unexpected that they won't know what to do, you'll catch them off guard, everything will feel different with you, it's like they've been in a grey and clouded place and you appear to make the sun shine again in their life. This past relationship marked them but knowing you will make them realize that not everyone is the same, you will make them gain hope in love again, it will happen naturally and your relationship will be blossoming peacefully but with certainty, from the first moments they'll know that you are meant for them and will work to make you know it. This is a soulmate connection so you'll feel very comfortable with eachother like you know the other from a very long time, I see a lot of funny dates together, like an exhibition of some kind (I'm translating directly from google but I mean those places wih a ferris wheel, bumper cars, cotton candy and those places where you get a teddy bear if you drop all the bottle from the shelf, something that sort, please comment me the correct name of this lol). An important thing I see here is that your person might be shy at first and will try to make things the right way, not forcing anything, but what I like the most is that even though they have their heart wounded, they won't pay this pain with you, in fact, you'll be a reason to stop thinking about the past pain and focusing on the precious future you could share together, you'll ignite them faith in life, they'll find motivation again, they might even realize that they weren't as comfortable in their solitude as they wanted to project. I see a fast commitment, I also see that they will leave you the key of their home so you can stay there even when they are working, they'll try to make you part of their day to day life and will be very honest with your from the start, you can ask them anything and they will respond with all the truth, even if the truth doesn't leave them in good place, they want you to know every detail about them, you can also trust in them to share whatever you want, they will be super understanding and compassionate.

Signals:

(Tea leafs: sunrise, woman, feather, bull, desk, scissors, caterpillar)

By the moment you are about to meet your person, you'll be finding out the true intentions of a woman in your life, I don't know why but the energy of this woman gives me really bad vibe, like a two faced person, is someone that you should put distance with in order to protect your energy because in terms of love she could often have bad experiences and she will not be happy for you when you find your soulmate. There also this message of not sharing your ideas about the future, not just in love but about your goals or plans in work too, if you are thinking about initiate something by your own just keep it private for a while, or at least just share it with your closest ones because this woman or femenine energy around you don't what you to thrive. The good thing is that you got the card of the sunrise, so you'll be having a lot of new ideas that will lead you to find success, I'd suggest you to write down those ideas,take time to organize them and start implementing them in aries season, at the beggining of the spring, energies will be at your favor. For your person they'll be working really hard, there might be a chance for a rise or getting a higher position in their work field and they'll be focused into that, for others of you there might also be the chance that your person will be getting another job with a better salary, I'm getting especially this second option because your person seems to be very unhappy in their current job and they need better conditions, it also seems like there is some opposition from someone in their work and your person has to keep themselves in a defensive position to deal with it and they don't want this no more, they know they deserve a healthier work enviroment, maybe there's an abusive boss here. There's the possibility that you are really close to meet eachother because of the cards on tarot and this message so be aware of your surroundings because your person is closer than you imagine :)

Channeled messages: a puppy, sexy but don't know it, romantic dates, strong arms, meet them in a public place like a park, a market or a place with art or literature involved like museums or book stores, gift giving, a soft pink or white dress, night dates, overthinking, financial struggle, 999, 1333, virgo, scorpio, cancer and leo, might be seasons for you two meet or your person's sign.

Pile 2:

Who is your destined person?

(Cards: 9 of wands, 4 of swords, 7 of pentacles, 10 of pentacles, justice, death, world/ devil, justice, queen of pentacles, judgement, king of wands)

Okay, lets start saying that you know this person but never had anything romantic with them besides a crush for some of you, they are someone that is familiar to you, maybe you have talked at some point or is simplier than that and you follow them on social media or something that sort, you know eachother but there's almost any interaction between you two. I usually say on private readings when I see that the consultant know their person that Universe has a wicked sense of humor and sometimes, this person can be so random as your crush on primary school, someone you talked once in a party, a friend of a friend and those kind of things, so don't be dissapointed when you see that you know your person because many times, even though you know them, they can be the most random person you could ever imagine. Right now your person is going through some legal issues, it can be a divorce for some of you but for others it might be more related to an spiritual awakening where they are taking resposibility over things they have done in the past, like paying some karma and realizing why they are paying it. The good thing is that your person is closing a chapter, this awakening can be hard, because of the devil card, but it also will bring them a big relief and a change in their reality for the best, there's also a change in their way to face life. For what I see in the cards, your person is wealthy or well positioned in life, probably has a high position in their work field, for some they can work in something related to laws but is an enviroment with a lot of competition and stabs in the back, you have to be a little ruthless to thrive in that area, there's also a chance that they already have a child or kids near them, if you have children, your person will get along very well with your kid too. Your person has an strong temper, the good part of it is that they are very protective of what they love and don't mind getting into trouble if that means keeping their beloved ones safe. The not so good part is that they can be too impulsive and irrational when angry, their passionate spirit can take the best from them sometimes, they will be your total opposite so if you have a natural calmed and peaceful temper this pile is for you. Your person is someone brave, a natural extrovert with a lot of charisma, they can draw all the attention of a room to them just with an smile, they are also very sexy, physically they are extremely attractive, they could also be a Libra or Sagittarius sun sign. Your person hasn't been an angel in their past, even though they are a nice person with a good heart, it seems like they did ot take the best decitions in their past and now they are regreting some mistakes. They are really handsome and charming, I see they haven't faced rejection in their past and that has led them to be too confident, they are the kind of person who always gets what they want, do you know Dexter from the show One Day? your person reminds me of him in the good and the bad traits. Anyway, they recently had an experience that made them realize the path they were taking and they want a diferent direction, they don't feel fulfilled and knows that can get something better for themselves, they are also facing the consequences of their actions si they might need some extra time to get into your life.

Your connection:

(Cards: this could be the one, trust, children, worth waiting for/ talking, golden mirror, sword and rose, self indulgence, love call)

You'll share a very special bond, I see trust issues from both of you but at the moment you start something together those issues will fade, it's like your souls will recognize that you both are meant for eachother, feelings will bloom naturally. I see different scenarios for your pile so take what resonates with you, for the people who already know who this person is, the cards invite you to keep hopeful but patient, just trust the Universe and focus on your bussiness meanwhile your person puts their life in order and solve the issues they are currently dealing with, you deserve to enjoy their best version. For others of you who can't figure out yet who your person is, the cards have a similar meaning, to stay optimistic visualizing your ideal relationship, you'll have to wait a little more than the other piles because your person is dealing with issues they need to resolve before meeting you, again, you deserve to enjoy their best version, your vibration is very high so having your person right now in your life with their current circumstances could affect negatively your energy, so this wait is a divine protection for you. Things will start by flirting between both of you, maybe some casual dates at first but for what see in the cards, there's a lot of communication here and it makes sense because through communication trust gets reinforced and that's what you both need. You both will be very different but will have so much in common, your experiences in life or even your tastes or hobbies, your favorite artist or the kind of music you like, it will start by something simple but then you'll realize how similar you truly are, you will mirror eachother in every aspect, for some with an spiritual development I see this person is your twin flame. A nice thing a like about your person is that they will allow you to stay in your femenine energy, the card of self indulgence gives me the feeling that they'll provide for the things you like, just as an example, if you are into a saga of books but you don't have enough money to afford everyone of them so you go buy it one by one, your person will buy you all the saga so you can enjoy your hobbies. For some of you I even see that your person pays for your beauty treatments like getting your lashes or nails done. I see that they'll like to take a protective role with you, if you are easilly stressed, especially in regards of legal matters or burocracy, your person will take care of it so you don't have to worry, if you have any dream or goal you want to achieve your person will also provide you a safe space so you can develop it, especially for those of you who are into arts or something that involves creativity

Signals:

(Tea leafs: teapot, mule, wreath, shield, stork, wedge, heart)

Your signs to know when your person is about to enter your life will be a dissapointment with a friendship of your same sex, you might have an idea of who this person is because you have been seeing red flags from them in the past but you have turned a blind eye with them, especially in terms of stubborness and not wanting to change their habits. I'm getting that they are the kind to mourn and complain over things that they could easilly change, even you could have given them advices in the past but this person is unwilling to change for the better so you'll have to take them out of your life before your person comes. The tea leafs say that this won't be easy for you because you love and appreciate this person but by having them in your life you have to stay in a protective state, the shield warns you that you need to protect yourself from this person because they are consuming your energies. For your person, they'll be in a process of creating something new, I'm getting that it will be related to work, they'll be moving in silence because there's someone near them that don't want your person to be successful in this new project, anyway the project will thrive regardless of what other people try to mess with it. Your person will be just about to get their victory when they get in a deeper contact with you, they'll feel like things are getting better for them after everything they had to go through, you'll be like their ultimate victory. They'll know it's you because they'll feel safe by your side, having in mind that they are surrounded by snakes, getting in contact with you will feel for them like being in precence of angels.

Channeled messages: protect yourself from evil eye, black turmaline, long term relationship, karmic debts, late night conversations, a lot of sexual energy, love letters, release the old so the new can enter, the goddess Kali, law of attraction, subliminal audios, stay in your femenine energy, the bee and the flower, trust the process, 1111, 222, sagittarius, libra, scorpio

Pile 3:

Who is your destined person?

(Cards: queen of cups, king of pentacles, queen of pentacles, 3 of wands, fool, king of cups, 10 of pentacles/ ace of wands, 8 of pentacles rev, 5 of swords rev, judgement, emperor)

This person is your soulmate/twin flame, they are your divine counterpart so you will notice it from the very first moment you meet them. Getting into who your person is, they come from a wealthy background, their family seem to be very rich to say the least, they have been a pampered child all their life, in fact, if they work is because they want to not because they need to. Your person has been raised by parents that are soulmates so they know what true love is and knows that they want that type of connection for them too, they are a romantic and are not afraid to express it, they are also very well mannered so expect them to be chilvalrous with you, they are a true gentleman. They are so open to love that is overwhelming, they fantazise an daydream a lot about you, how you look, your way to walk and your smell, they have you so much in their head but they feel frustration not knowing who you are and when you will appear, they look for you everywhere they go and in every person they meet, yu cold even feel their energy calling you, if you have romantic dreams with someone but you can see their face clearly it is your person calling you in, you can intuitively feel them, I'm also getting that if you are able to see the face of someone familiar to you in dreams like a famous person just check that person you dream about because they might reselble the characteristics of your person. They have a melancholic soul, like a poet from another century, they are very deep and emotional, they have so much love inside they want to offer but they feel frustrated because they don't find the right person to share it with, they don't want only to share love they want someone to share all their life with, they feel like they already have it all to live a happy life but there's this missing peace of wanting to share all their abundance with someone else. There's this phrase of the movie 'into the wild' (my favourite movie ever <3) that says 'happiness is only real when it's shared', I feel that your person resonates a lot with this phrase, they have people they love around but they crave a romantic connection to create a family with, btw, they are really into marriage and family, they also like children and animals and they love your person too. Your person has a sensitive heart and the pain of their solitude has led them to get involved with people with superficial intentions or toxic behaviors, mostly because of your person's money, they had a relationship in the past that left them feeling empty and that's why now they are giving themselves time to be alone and with their family, I see they have siblings that are playing a major role into your person's emotional healing. Idk if you'll know about this book, it's called fallen hearts by V.C Andrews, it is part of the Casteel saga but the character that reminds me of your person appears on the second book, his name is Troy Tatterton, I suggest you to read it or let me know if you already know them :). I also see that your person has traveled a lot, for some of you, you could even live at distanced places where you'd had to travel to see eachother, it may be in one of your person's journeys where they finally meet you.

The connection:

(Cards: true love, getting to know eachother, playfulness, wedding/ casette, hammer, camera, separation, twin flames)

Oh goddess, this is so beautiful it makes me want to cry! If it was up to your person they would marry you as soon as they meet you, after all their painful journey, when you appear in their life they'll feel like the skies will open up only for them, they'll know it's you and will court you from the very first moment, they will be flirty but charming at the same time, I see you'll feel the same too. Even though that feelings will be intense at first, you both will make the effort to get to know eachother on deeper levels to check your chemistry and compatibility, everything will feel light and easy, you'll get along super well, they'll make you feel like you are in a safe place, if you are naturally introverted they'll make you feel protected and, in case you are an hyper independent person, you'll feel like you can finally relax and release some of the weight over your shoulders. At some point you'll have distance between you two but it won't separate you, I see you will make the best of every moment you spend together and, after a little time your person will offer you a seious commitment so you can start your life together as a couple, it might also be a soon engagement. I see that you'll be watching the pictures and videos you make together, especially if decide to travel, I see a fancy cabin near a forest where you are staying together to spend some alone time with nobody else there to bother you. The time you spend separated will play a major role for you two to decide that you want to be together forever, I see that your person will have a harder time being away from you, that's why they won't hesitate at the moment of offering you commitment, probably they give you a promise ring or tell you to get married, it will happen sooner than usual but both of you will feel certain about this relationship and what you want from it, you'll fit like puzle pieces and you'll both will understand why things didn't work with anybody else in the past.

Signals:

(Tea leafs: gong, key, shark, caterpillar, dagger, camel, unicorn, carriage)

For you, you'll be receiving good news about something you have done, it will be something exciting for you, a successful outcome for something you put a lot of effort in, you could even celebrate it with your close ones because this will make you very happy. There's a little warning for you about being responsible with your money but also I see you could loose something important like a jewel or something with big material value like a phone or something that sort, so if you suddently loose soemthing important take it as a sign that your person is about to enter your life. For your person I'd confirm what I said before about the trip, the carriage means a journey either be a mental or physical but I feel that it's a trip for vacation. This journey is because they have been through a period of worries and stress, they just have solved a problem before making this trip, this solution will involve some changes in their life that will align them with their highest good so, overcoming this obstacle will finally lead them to you, their most desired wish. They'll be taking a time to release all the tension they've been holding, it is surely oon holidays so check the calendar just in case, they'll be with more people in this journey, probably their siblings, your meeting will be something spontaneous, neither of you will be expetiing it

Channeled messages: Water sign, earth moon sign, family money, colors red and green, divine counterparts, white doves and sunflowers, many options in love, send you romantic phrases or pictures that reminds them of you, settle down, a midset change, aries season, 777, 1818

Pile 4:

Who is your destined person?:

(Cards: knight of wands, 10 of cups, moon, queen of pentacles, 8 of pentacles, knight of swords/ 7 of cups rev, 9 of swords, queen of pentacles, fool, empress)

Your person got the queen of pentacles repeated with two different tarot decks, this gives me the feeling that they feel plenty with the current direction of their life, with the 10 of cups I'd confirm that they feel happy and fulfilled and everything is working out for your person. Besides that luck is on their side naturally, your person has fought to be in the place they are right now, they are following their passion and vocation and being loyal to their heart has lead them to success and recognition, they are also very optimistic and knows how to see the good side of things at every situation. Your person reminds me of Eli from Boy swallows universe (please watch the show, it's awesome and you'll love Eli), your person is brave, independent and resourceful, even daring sometimes, they are loyal to their truth and their heart, in fact I see they can be a little obsessed with finding out the truth of things so they could even be into conspiracy theories or things that sort. Your person is a wanderer, a curious soul but with a grounded spirit, they can be wild sometimes but they know their own limits and knows when to stop, they are really down to earth and mature on the important matters but very lighthearted and spontaneus when the ocassion requires it. They have been through seriouus things in the past, they may have some unresolved heavy trauma they didn't gave themselves the chance to solve it so they might act reckless sometimes, but the good thing is that they have an strong moral compass and value system they keep loyal at every moment, betray their values would feel like betraying themselves and that's something they don't want to go through. Your person can be an unintentional heartbreaker, they don't want to hurt anybody's feelings but it's easy for people to catch feelings for your person, is something about their aura or their energy, they are so warm and gentle that everybody feels drawn to them and can't help but develop feelings for them, they are easy to be loved. Your person is really smart, they could be air dominant in their chart because they also seem like having a talent with words or being a great communicator, they are also very funny so expect to laugh a lot with them, they might be younger than you or it's simply that they have a youthful energy, whatever it is they have this childlike energy that makes them lovely. Your person has this golden retirever energy that everyone likes, they are also very friendly and seems to have it easy to create friendships with other people, their sense of humor is a plus on this aspect too, they are a sweetheart with a loving heart but they are also very hard working and commited to what they think is right, you'll feel super comfortable by their side, even though they could be younger they will give off very mature and reliable energy.

The connection:

(Cards: Keep an open mind, retreat, flirt, love yourself first, chemistry/ the sword and rose, girl talk, cupid's arrow, sunglasses, engagement ring)

Okay, at first they might not be your usual type or the kind of person you would be interested in, for some, your person could be younger than you and that could be a turn off for you. Your connection will bloom progressively by creating a friendship first, besides the fact that your person will be very into you from the very first moment, they'll prefer to respect your times and show you they are worthy of your love, they will feel like they are out of your league for some reason. You might run from them at a certain moment because you get confused with your emotions, especially for those of you reading this that are a water moon, you'll need some time to reflect on your emotions and realize that there's an inmense chemistry between you two, maybe this distance you take serves you as a reassurance of how drawn you feel to this person, they'll have a bad time with this retreat but for you will be very healing and enlightning. I see that there's a female or dominant femenine energy in your life you trust so much, that person is very reliable and wise, don't doubt to ask them for advice because she will bring you clarity about the situation, I'm glad to say that you have an amazing support system, count on that female friend when you need mental clarity because she will be very honest, for some of you this person could be a sister. During this separation you might think that your person is focused into their bussiness but they'll be into stalker mode (positively, of course), checking up on you, they might even ask someone close to you how you are doing just to know about you, they'll also be checking your social media to know about you, they won't do it in a creepy way, they'll feel the same pull to you but they have a harder time trying to contain their emotions, the good thing is that you seem to be very intuitive so you'll know when their energy is trying to approach you. They'll be so in love with you, it feels like they fell first but you'll fall harder after a while, you both are soulmates so, even though you'll try to fight your feelings, you can't help but fall for this person, and after you see how much they are willing to offer and their true esence you'll fall for them (I'm writting this at 15:15 on my clock in case it's a relevant number for you). They'll wear their heart on their sleeve, they'll be very protective of you and won't allow any disrispect to you, they can be cutthroating if anybody tries to mess with you, tey'll feel so honnoured by you focusing on them that they will try to make you the happiest person ever everyday of your life, they can't believe their luck by finding a person like you and receiving love from you, this connection will be an equal give and take, you both will do everything for the other to make them happy.

Signals:

(Tea leafs: dolphin, windchimes, fox, broken ring, bull, needle and thread, ant, table)

For you, you'll be in a very nice moment of your life when you are about to meet your person, you'll be receiving a big amount of money because of something you did in the past, like a material reward. This material abundance will give you a feeling of peace and relief, you have the chance to have some vacations or free time by yourself, I see you a little secretive about this, like you don't want anybody to ruin this good time, you may also be silent about the amount of money you receive. For your person, they'll be dettaching from someone or something, the broken ring is usually associated with romance but I feel it more related to bussiness so they might be changing their job for a healthiest enviroment (if you felt called to pile 1 I suggest you to check it), it seems like their current work field is forcing your person to sacrifice themselves and keeps them in a defensive position. They'll have to work hard but it will bring them stability and security.

Channeled messages: Acts of service, getting a pet together, a cat person, sleep problems, full moons affect their mood, white horses and moths, vivid dreams, sitcoms, a lot of laugh, mental fog, meditation, 1212, 444, taurus, gemini, aquarius

[todaystarot]

What Will Your Future Child Love About You?

- a pick a card.

one two three

explanation.

I always see people say that there are many forms of love, not just romantic. Which, they are correct in. Yet, they still have a narrow view on it and refer to friendship as an example, or if they are big hearted their pet… Which is completely fine, I just felt a desire to create a pick a card that’s focused on love but none of those things. I never saw a pick a card with this topic before, neither on youtube or on tumblr. Could just be me though. Felt like making it anyway. If you don’t want children, that’s cool, I chose this topic because I would like to be a mother one day. This reading also applies to the first child you will have, or you know, the next one.

disclaimer.

Remember to take things with a grain of salt, and only take what resonates. Not because I don’t trust my skills, but because several people read pacs, what’s not meant for you could mean the world for someone else. Besides, this is for entertainment and the energy surrounding you or the overall situation could change any second. Life is unpredictable.

how to pick your pile.

There is always several ways to pick a pile, and sometimes maybe multiple call for us. You can pick the one that you can’t take your eyes off, even if there’s another picture you might find prettier. You can ask your guides to guide you in choosing a pile, or go with the old regular closing your eyes and picking whichever one your eyes land on. I usually do that too.

proof read?

Unfortunately no. Please know that I would never put anything in my PAC with harmful intentions towards you or anybody else.

one

You, my dear pile one will be so loved for so many reasons! It’s truly incredible. Even though you might not think that you will be an awesome parent - maybe now, maybe in the future -, trust me, your child will think otherwise! First of all, they will have this adoration towards you staying calm even in stressful situations and knowing how to handle things, how to take care of them and provide a solution and smooth things out. This is will make them feel safe next to you, and with time calm down as they see that you yourself are calm too. Of course, you wouldn’t always be calm, but you wouldn’t show even when you are scared so there is someone grounded in the situation that can take charge even if just on an emotional level. - I am saying this because your spouse will help you out when things are hard, not because you aren’t capable. -

Another thing here seems to be that you will respect their privacy and love life, as long as they are safe you will let them love safely and explore their interests as much as they need to in order to be happy. You let them be independent all while allowing them to rely on you and come to you when they need it. They know that this isn’t something everyone has, so they are all the more grateful to have someone like you as their parent. You are not invasive, you are not judgmental but so full of love, acceptance and understanding towards them. Maybe because you had a childhood where you weren’t happy, so you will do your best to give them everything good that you couldn’t get to have. Full of love, and they will remember it for the rest of their life.

📜 nine of swords, two of cups reversed, four of cups, page of swords reversed, queen of cups side ways, knight of swords side ways - facing the other way -, three of wands

confirmation.

high school musical , adele , nelly - dilemma , ‘i will love you till the day that I die , someone in this pile had to give up on their dream to be a singer/musical artist, hamilton, ‘vanessa open the door please��, ‘ (…)running out of time’ , 777 , city girl , virgo - do you have tummy issues? - , rihanna & eminem / asap rocky , pink nails but w a lot of charms , diverse pile

two

Alright, so I will be honest with you. Your next child will have some developmental issues, but not necessarily life threatening ones. - neither in a sense of d*ath or having trouble living on their own. they will just need a bit of help. - While asking your questions I stuttered a lot despite being calm, so I honestly think your child will have speech issues. Maybe potentially this could be genetic, or anything of the sort.. They will love you because even if you will have a hard time, where your mental health or emotional state will be tested you will never ever in your life will give them a hard time for whatever it is that they are struggling with. You will be loving, kind, gentle and patient with them. Instead of forcing them to learn in a pace which will stress them out you will be the one to learn how to understand what works best for them, and do that. They will really appreciate this. Honestly, regardless of whatever this issue is, I feel sorry because they have such a sensitive heart. Even if they shouldn’t, there is just some things they take to the heart and might feel like they are the problem even though they didn’t do anything. Such a pure child, the sort that’s very well behaved, kind to adults and friendly to their peers.. so these thoughts really could just come from overhearing and misinterpreting conversations or perhaps just overthinking. The funny thing is, I do think you would be their safe haven because they know you would never judge them no matter what heartbreak they are going through. It’s like they can’t imagine a life without you.

Now, I don’t mean to be an asshole or scare anyone unnecessarily. I am not a doctor and I will never be, but the ace of cups reversed here can represent miscarriages or pregnancy complications. So please if you are a woman look after your health. I don’t mean to scare you bc at the end of the day this is a collective general reading and we don’t know each other, but it’s always nice to look after your health regardless.

On a MUCH brighter note though, they will truly appreciate whenever you support their interests. They might be a book worm, so if this is something you two have in common they could happily share their interests with you! They will do it regardless, but your baby would get so excited if you show interest in them.

You will also stand next to them and support them no matter what they go through in life, let that be good or bad, which is something they will really appreciate.

📜 six of pentacles reversed, knight of pentacles, four of wands, ace of cups reversed, the heirophant, the high priestess, seven of pentacles

confirmation.

twilight , renesme , butterflies , cross necklace , bbc , orange hair and freckles - this is for someone who will have a little boy - , ocean green eyes , what was I made for - Billie Eilish , 5sos , ‘i bet on losing dogs’ , mother mary , flashing lights , genetic , obsession with beats / drums ? - not for the child, a reader in this pile -

three

Your child, will sometimes give you headaches.. but they will really love you. If you have ever seen modern family then they sort of remind me of Hailey in the earlier seasons. Bratty, picks fights, doesn’t always understand where her mom is coming from but sees all the hard work that she does and appreciates and loves her mother - both parents really - quite deeply. Not to say I am calling your child bratty, or a brat. That’s not where I am going with this, rather your guides pulled towards letting you know this first so you don’t misunderstand the rest of the reading.

They will, first of all, love that you will give them everything that you can. Y’all will be pretty well off. Not only will you guys be able to live comfortably but they will have a few unnecessary things that they don’t even need or probably forget about in a few years after getting it. They are not ungrateful, rather the opposite. They know this is a privilege, they don’t look down on those less fortunate than you guys, they are just grateful that they have a parent that cares about them so much they would give them everything they ask for, even if things aren’t always the brightest. You also, always, without any question get them out of any trouble or uncomfortable situation and defend them. Won’t matter if they are in the wrong or not, that’s your baby and you will stand by them!

They also love to travel with you! They enjoy your company a lot and to make memories, they always look forward to exploring the world with you. They might also follow you around like a little duckling, even if you only go to the store or to do some super boring errands. Honestly, your kid is an extrovert and super clingy. In a cute way though for sure.

Your dynamic with them reminds me of a tiktok I saw months back, where the teenage kid was piggy back riding the mom and she was annoyed as she recorded saying “look what I have to deal with”, but in reality she truly just appreciated the love. Such an easy going and regular pile, love that for y’all.

📜 nine of pentacles, seven of pentacles, the hermit reversed, knight of swords, four of wands, six of swords, three of wands

confirmation.

thrift shop - macklemore , old house in the balkans/europe in summer - ?? so specific, did you travel back to your home country in summer or planned to? - , moonlight , witch craft , snake , ‘i know a place we can escape ‘ , those fluffy slippers that are like plushies & soft pjs , airplanes , power wires , lime - & cheetos ?? -

[davidtennantgenderenvy]

On David Tennant and Aging

So, I’ve seen a lot of posts in response to Tumblr users’ habit of affectionately calling their favorite middle aged dudes “old men”, David Tennant in particular, saying things like “clearly you’ve never met an actual old person”, “omg you talk about these guys like they’re 80”, “please be normal about people aging”, etc. And on one hand, all of these statements are objectively right and true! But as someone who’s always been really fascinated by and found a lot of beauty in getting older (which I’ve explored in some of my writing on A03 because nobody else is going to do it for me), I’d like to provide a bit more nuance on how I think this label applies to David in particular.

David, obviously, in literal terms, is not “old”, at least not to me- I don’t personally consider people old until they get past 60. 52 is middle aged, simple as that. And yet, when I see David stuck with the “old man” label, it still somehow feels weirdly right, for a number of reasons.

It annoys me so much when people say David “hasn’t aged a day since Doctor Who”, because, well…

He clearly has. A lot. He’s got forehead creases, deep crows’ feet and eyebags, and I think that post-Fourteen we’re gonna see him rocking the grey temples a LOT more. He also has the voice of an older man now, his upper range is still there but the default is much more deep and rich, with a gravelly, rumbling quality that just goes straight through you. I personally think Broadchurch was when David finally started to embrace looking his age- Alec Hardy just wouldn’t have been served by Ten’s fresh-faced boyishness.

Obviously, these are the kinds of changes you’d expect any 52-year-old man to have, but something about David just makes it all seem a bit more… intense? The expressiveness of his face combined with his almost gaunt frame makes his wrinkles very prominent, and when he works his voice to its emotional extremes, his lower register can sound positively ancient, to devastating effect.

David, I think, is someone with an old soul- I don’t think he could be as good as he is at playing ancient characters like Crowley and The Doctor if he weren’t. He has lived so many lives, given so much of himself to so many characters, often incredibly tragic ones, and I think it wears on him. David also has five kids. FIVE. Do you know how exhausting it is to be one of the hardest working actors alive and be a present, loving father to even ONE child? But David somehow does it anyway! Nowadays I see him and my heart breaks because he looks so tired, so weary and fragile. But he’s all the more beautiful for it to me because I know that that is because he is kind. He’s a deeply empathetic person who feels and lives to the absolute fullest, and that story is written so clearly on his face, along with every other story he has ever been a part of.

There’s other things about David that make the label endearingly fitting- his utter hopelessness when it comes to technology, for instance. And he’s just got that warm, wise, grandpa energy too sometimes- look at that above Fourteen picture and tell me I’m wrong!

I once showed my friend who’d only seen David in Doctor Who and Harry Potter a picture of David from Around The World in 80 Days. It was a particularly emotional scene, and his face had just the most beautiful expression of compassion and sadness, every wrinkle on full display. And she said, in a less than complimentary fashion, “he looks so old!” Which, of course, offended me quite a bit at first. But to me, referring to David as old almost feels like a badge of honor, something he’s earned by living fully and selflessly, working hard and being wise and compassionate beyond his years. I think David himself is secretly more than a little insecure about the fact that he’s getting older. There’s sadness behind every jovially self-depreciating remark he’s made about his age in the past year, particularly in comparing himself to Ncuti Gatwa. I know how much David struggles with his impostor syndrome and how people perceive him, and I can clearly see in his eyes the fear of being discarded, the anxiety he feels about if he’ll still be as loved as he was back in 2007 now that he’s closer in age to King Lear than he is to Romeo. So I hope David knows it’s a privilege to watch him grow older, to watch his soul and talents deepen with the crinkles around his eyes. If I, in my silly goofy tumblr girl-ness, call David Tennant an old man, it’s because it’s a label that suits him beautifully- even if it isn’t TECHNICALLY an accurate one yet.

[starlostseungmin]

husband!jeongin

✰ notes: this is 2 days late but jeongin’s here!! thank you so much to that jeongin biased anon who read my husband minho headcanon and for giving me this idea!! i appreciate you so much <33 not proofread. DO NOT FORGET TO REBLOG, COMMENT AND LEAVE TAGS! thank you <33

seungmin , chan , lee know（ jeongin ）han , changbin , felix , hyunjin.

ꔛ

Husband Jeongin who tripped when he got down on one knee just to propose. You laughed at him but said yes at the end. He got embarrassed so you gave him the sweetest kiss on the lips which he gladly returned passionately.

Husband Jeongin whose Hyungs got emotional the moment he’s officially married. Chan and Hyunjin cried the most. 

Husband Jeongin who got a full sponsor from Chan throughout your wedding to your honeymoon because he was generous and loves to spoil Jeongin. You too. 

Husband Jeongin who is clumsy and gives you secondhand embarrassment but the amount of love still remains. He tripped at the bowling alley after rolling the ball on your date. Not once but twice. 

Husband Jeongin whose idea of dates consists of watching movies at the cinema, shopping, eating at your favorite restaurants, and spontaneous travels. 

Husband Jeongin who scams you with his cuteness just to make you buy him some stuff, especially his type of shoes and he feels like he’s on top of the world when you do. He goes for the weird ones with style. 

Husband Jeongin who buys you your favorite albums even though he jokes around that you’re cheating on him with another group rather than his own. 

Husband Jeongin who loves shopping and stealing kisses inside the fitting room cubicles while you are changing. You weren’t used to it as it leaves a blush on your cheeks. 

Husband Jeongin who loves taking selfies with you. In this marriage, you are the photographer and he’s the model but at the same time, he loves taking pictures of you, especially candid ones. 

Husband Jeongin who loves food, and rates them with you based on their tastes. 

Husband Jeongin who takes you out on a night stroll while eating ice cream you two bought from the convenience store nearby. 

Husband Jeongin who is the reason for your cuteness aggression that makes you want to smooch and cuddle him all day. He can’t resist any physical touch from you anyway. 

Husband Jeongin who can’t cook to save his life so you taught him how to yet still fails. You both just laugh it off. 

Husband Jeongin who respects your beliefs and never judges them. 

Husband Jeongin whose love languages are gift-giving, quality time, and physical touch. 

Husband Jeongin who lets you sleep on his shoulder, on his lap, or just use his body as your pillow. He doesn’t mind and doesn’t say anything but initiates cuddles to make you more comfortable. 

Husband Jeongin who gets angry when someone upsets you and is the type of person to do something back so no one could touch you again. 

Husband Jeongin who can’t keep up for a long time being not okay with you after an argument and proceeds to apologizeーhugging you tenderly as he whispers that he loves you. 

Husband Jeongin who doesn’t want to be away from you for a long time and misses you the most when he goes abroad to work. He’ll call you when he gets to the airport or when he’s not busy. 

Husband Jeongin who loves kids but doesn’t pressure you to have one with him.

Husband Jeongin who tries his hardest in this relationship to give you the love you deserve but you insist that he doesn’t need to put in a lot of effort because he is already enough and the heartwarming things he does with you are considered as reassurance. 

Husband Jeongin who is a baby and still a baby for you even if he insists that he’s already a grown-up. His Hyungs would argue otherwise. 

Husband Jeongin who has a precious smile and adorable laugh. He has a lot of cute sides and whines like a kid in a good and acceptable manner. 

Husband Jeongin who is always true about his feelings for you and never lies. 

Husband Jeongin whom you love the most in the world and swore you’ll protect him at any cost. 

Husband Jeongin who promised to love you forever and never hurt you which you’d do too. 

✰ taglist: @notastraykid , @ameliesaysshoo , @l3visbby , @reignessance , @lix-ables , @skzfelixlove , @rachabreathing , @hyunverse , @minluvly , @sleepyleeji , @starseungs , @midsoulz , @oddracha , @armystay89

©️ 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐌𝐈𝐍 , 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒.

[sxorpiomooon]

What does your younger self think about you? A pac reading

This reading scared the fucking shit out of me guys had to gather alot of courage to do it. Good luck

Paid readings

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Pile 1-

I think pile 1's younger self thinks that they have been indulging themselves in something too much for no reason? Like pile 1 has been too impatient. They might think that you might have started to focus too much on the appearance of things I especially see this for yourself too. This pile might be too focused on how they look overall and I see it causing them harm. "Only understanding the cost of things and not their value" is what I heard. This is so cute but I think pile 1's younger self likes how feminine they've become now? For some reason I had a vision of cinderalla. I think this pile's younger self is super excited about them being able to dress up nicely. I think the younger self also thinks that you guys have more resources than you did back then whether it's in the material sense or people but they're very happy with that. For some of you, if you are trying to get pregnant or alr have kids i see your pile being very very excited and happy about that too. The younger self also thinks that you guys tend to walk away from things too early? Oml pile 1 i hope y'all not gambling n shit😭 anyways they think that just when you are about to win, you decide to leave that thing behind. The main message I get is being patient with yourself also heard "my patience leads to perseverance"

Pile 2-

Your younger self is satisfied with how far you've come. Especially in the emotional sense they think that you have reached emotional stability and know your worth and it makes them happy. Also if you are someone who wins a lot of awards and has a pile of awards stacked up perhaps someone who's also athletic, your younger self is very proud. pile 2 has found themselves. I see that you might have had a lot of experiences helping you in gaining wisdom and whatever you needed to be at this level. Your younger self also loves how sensitive you are and how much in touch with your emotions you are. For some of you, i see that you've not turned out how you would've expected yourself to be(in a good way) so even your younger self is surprised. They love how much of a dreamer you are. However I think this pile has a lot of struggles or tests that life or fate puts them through. You might struggle a bit with authority and communication this I see happening bc of not proper communication I think your younger self wants you to have more clarity regarding that.

Pile 3-

Your younger self thinks that you've lost your way and your sight.

"If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you."

Is something that I heard immediately. Your younger self might think that you are very trapped and alone misguided in this world right now I keep hearing unreal monsters lure for some reason? Your younger self might also think that you have been lied to or taken advantage of by people? However, your younger self also thinks that alot of things are going wrong simply because you are trying to find your way and as long as you make sure to balance everything especially your priority and as I heard "the life that you want" it will all be ok

Pile 4-

Your younger self wants you to live your life and indulge into things and whatever that you like but they also want you to take a few minutes to see the bigger picture of it every time before you make a decision or do something. "Does it really serve me?" Is something that I keep hearing. Having pleasure and fun is nice but it also must be done to a limit. Me and the devil keep playing in my head and I keep hearing ego. Some of you have to keep your ego in check. Brat keeps playing in my head and I'm seeing a dj party for some reason. Your younger self also thinks that either you alr have or you are going to start a new beginning very soon and they seem excited for that bc that might be the path you are meant to follow. They want you to take the leap of faith and have courage in yourself. They also want you to always keep learning and defend yourself when needed

[theyhavetakenovermylife]

hii i love your writing so much! this is my first ever request so sorry if it sounds weird!

can i please request some general dating headcanons for (older) rise donnie? for example, what hes like as a boyfriend, the types of dates he likes, his quirks etc in a relationship!

thank you 🫶💜🐢

Dating Headcanons (Fluff/Angst)

Future!Donatello x reader

A/N: You’re request doesn’t sound weird at all, so no worries💜 Now, I would usually post this with a picture of one of the turtles, with a somewhat matching tone. But since there’s no official illustrations of Future!Donatello (as far as I’m aware), and I don’t feel safe using someone’s art without permission, I’m just going to use this shot of Donnie. Anyway, hope you’ll enjoy💜

Warnings: The Krang future is quite a bit more angst than the good future, so if you’re only looking for the sweet stuff, just head straight for that💜

Krang future:

Dating in a Krang infested world, living in a bunker deep under earth, was not easy for anybody. It is a stressful and depressing way of living, where everyday is about survival, with little no time left for love. Yet, emotional beings always seem to find a way for such things, even in the hardest of times. And so did you and Donnie.

With Donnie being the main reason that the bunker was functioning - having been the one that built the whole thing - your boyfriend was often stuck in his lap, working not just for his own joy, but for the survival of all that called the bunker home. It was not easy for Donnie, as one small mistake could mean the death of all. And so, your job quickly became helping Donnie destress, keeping him above and sane from all that was going on around him. It was your job to make sure that Donnie was able to move forward, even if it sometimes felt useless. And that wasn’t easy for either of you.

Dating in a world overrun by Krangs, isn’t really like dating in a normal world. You don’t go on dates, and rarely have time to actually spend any form of intimate time together. No, dating in a world of Krangs meant finding a person, who you wished to survive with. It meant looking out for each other before anybody else, and at times even giving up rescurses for the one you loved. Which you and Donnie had done plenty of times, giving up food, water and time for each other.

Though Donnie may be tired most of the time, it didn’t make him any less caring. He had his own way of showing it though. He had thousands of ways to check up on your wellbeing, going to somewhat drastic lengths in order to make sure that you were safe in your small home in the bunker. He was absolutely against the idea of you going to the surface with any of his brothers for supply runs, almost getting to the point of panic attacks.

On the rare occasions that you and Donnie actually had time to act like an actual couple, you didn’t do much. You would usually cuddle and enjoy the company of one another, before eventually falling asleep in each other's arms. It wasn’t often that the two of you got to feel safe like that, and it was increasingly rare that you would feel as well rested, as you did after a cuddle session with Donnie.

Good future:

In a world in which you and Donnie didn’t have to worry about much more than whether you should be drinking Coca Cola or Pepsi with your pizza in the evening, the two of you had the time along with the mental and emotional excuse to build your relationship in a healthy manner. Both you and Donnie had your own interests, in which you respected and engaged each other. You would let Donnie talk hours on end about what he had been working on in his lab, and in turn he would do the same for you, often listening while tinkering with what he had just been talking about. It just made it easier for him to listen.

Donnie was for the most part a very relaxed boyfriend. He knew you were a grown adult, capable of taking care of yourself, allowing you large amounts of independence without getting bothered or insecure. However, Donnie could have his random moments of overprotection. The weather had been particularly bad, and it took you a little longer than usual to get? Donnie would start calculating the chances of you having gotten hurt, driving himself to a point of wild worry. That was usually right before you would make it through the door, where your now overly analytical and worried boyfriend would check you over five times, just to be sure that you were in fact okay.

It’s rare that you and Donnie would actually go out for dates. Donnie is generally most comfortable in his own home, and the thought of going out, being around a bunch of people, when your dates were supposed to be about just you and him, just didn’t sit right with Donnie. It was no secret that his social batteries had a tendency to run out fast when out and about, so he would much rather spend the night home alone with you, watching a movie, eating comfort food, or geeking out over something together. And it also tended to be much cheaper, which was a win for the both of you.

Donnie has never been much for PDA. He’s very affectionate when the two of you are alone, but when other people are around and he starts masking, he tends to get physically distant, and will often have a hard time with things touching him. However, he’s always up for a good banter. A small argument between the two of you, with well thought out points, that never went beyond smiles, actually taking joy in whatever back and furth you had, was a kind of affection Donnie often engaged in, no matter who was around. Other’s quickly learned to just let the two of you at it, and that those smiles were actually real. You guys enjoyed it. It was fun, and both of you understood what was going on. No need to spoil a good and functioning thing.

[redrose10]

This was a request for fake dating with Jungkook and prompt #40 I think I have always been in love with you for @yoongznme. I hope you like it!

< Lemonade >

Warnings: Hints of body insecurities

#40 “I think, I have always been in love with you.”

*******************************************************

“I’m sorry what?”, you asked them to repeat themselves for the third time still not believing what you were hearing. When your boss asked to have a word with you about a promotion you thought it would include a few extra responsibilities and hopefully a much needed raise because being a makeup artist for an award winning kpop group did not really pay as well as you’d think.

You never expected to be told that you would be pretending to be Jungkook’s girlfriend though. It was some crazy plan that the company’s PR team came up with after he had recently gotten some bad press over something dumb and out of his control but at the end of the day it was still bad press effecting numbers which effected profit.

They thought that it would be a good idea to make it look like he was a loving, sweet, devoted boyfriend who could do no wrong. Somehow or another your name got thrown in the mix because you yourself were nice, polite, and you had this kind of the good girl next door thing that they were looking for.

You were nervous to say the least. Jungkook was attractive, no one would deny that. He was also always very kind and thoughtful when you interacted and you definitely had a small crush on him but you were a professional and knew not to let your emotions get in the way of your work plus there’s no way a global superstar would ever actually want to date a struggling makeup artist.

However you agreed, though you had the suspicion you really didn’t have a choice anyways if you wanted to stay employed, and they told you to be back at the building tomorrow night at 8pm.

So you did just that. You were in the dress one of the stylist left for you and you’d done your makeup and hair. Jungkook was styled perfectly as usual and he smelled so warm and comforting as he gave you a hug, “You look really nice Y/N.”

“Thank you.”, you whispered hoping he couldn’t see you blush.

The plan was to drive over to a very well known hotspot for dinner. Idols frequented the place constantly so there was also a stream of paparazzi and fans trying to catch a glimpse.

When you arrived the amount of people shocked you. As soon as Jungkook appeared there were earth shattering screams and so many flashes of light you couldn’t see a foot in front of you.

“Y/N, just stay close behind me.”, he said taking your hand and helping you out of the car while making sure to block the view of the cameras so you could get out comfortably in your dress.

Once you were in view the screams got even louder although maybe angrier. The camera flashes definitely increased though giving you a headache. The bodyguards began to push through the crowd with Jungkook close behind, his hand tightly gripping yours as you tried to keep up.

Inside, the restaurant was significantly calmer which you appreciated. Jungkook sipped on his beer while you stuck to a lemonade.

“I’m sorry the company is making you go through this.”, he said finally after a bout of silence.

“It’s okay. They’re paying me quite a bit so it’s worth it.”, you chuckled not noticing the slight grimace on his face.

The rest of the dinner went smoothly. Jungkook was a great guest and you relaxed enjoyed hearing about his travels and all the funny stories he had, especially the one about Yoongi tripping and falling face first into a cake that Namjoon had decided to leave sitting on the living room floor for some strange reason. He showed you a picture of Yoongi’s face covered in frosting and you couldn’t wait to tease him about it when you saw him next.

After dinner the crowd outside had died down a little bit was still enough that you had to put on an act. Jungkook pulled you close against him as he took you outside and right into the waiting vehicle where he continued to hold you against him even as the car sped off. It sent a wave of emotions through you so you made sure to create a little bit of space between you both just to remind yourself that none of this was real.

It looked like the plan was working perfectly because the next morning there were several headlines questioning who was the cute woman Jungkook was photographed with last night. The fans were also loosing their minds over it, posting over and over about speculations and rumors. You did your best to try and avoid most of them because while a good chunk were generally in favor of the relationship there were still many, mostly fans, that were not happy about Jungkook possibly being in a relationship. This resulted in you seeing some hurtful words about yourself m before deciding to log out of all of your social medias.

The next several weeks were filled with much of the same. Various stages photo ops took place so that fans and photographers could catch moments between you both. When the rumors finally started to become out of hand the company released an official statement confirming the relationship between Jungkook and you, a sweet, down to earth makeup artist that he had fallen madly in love with. The media and fans lost their minds.

You went into this whole thing thinking it would be easy. You were getting a big payday to basically hangout with Jungkook and let your photo get taken. You didn’t expect for your crush to grow into being full on in love with him but it was hard not to fall. He was so incredibly thoughtful and sweet. He was always ordering you lunch or bringing you a coffee even when the cameras weren’t around. When your cat needed an unexpected emergency surgery he paid for it in full after overhearing you cry to one of your friends about how you couldn’t afford it. He was always telling you how pretty you looked or complimenting your clothes with a slight hint of a blush on his cheeks. When you were visiting a friend and missed the last bus and you called him as a last resort hoping he could ask the company to send a car he drove over an hour at 2am to personally pick you up himself while staying on the phone with you the whole time so that you wouldn’t be scared.

After a few months of this it was getting harder and harder to remind yourself this wasn’t real.

Up until this point things were going great. Your relationship was doing exactly what the PR team had hoped. People pretty much completely forgot about his previous scandal and were focused on how he was a sweet and generous boyfriend. His image had never been better.

Then there was an incident. Jungkook was very protective always keeping you close to him. Even when the bodyguards reminded him that they were there for your protection as well he still insisted on personally seeing to your safety.

So one morning you were set to board a flight to New York. Of course the entrance to the air port was packed full of paparazzi and fans all screaming and trying to get photos and videos of you two. The airport had put up barriers but with the amount of people all pushing and shoving some of the barriers got knocked down allowing the crowd to surge in.

Security did their best to surround you guys and get you through the crowd but they were greatly outnumbered.

Thanks to the loud noises and flashing lights and amount of people surrounding you it all became too much and you began to panic. You held onto Jungkook, squeezing his hand that was interlocked with yours to try and ground yourself and remind yourself that you were okay.

“It’s okay Y/N. I’ve got you. We’ll get through this.”, he said trying to comfort you.

The crowd surged forward again. Thanks to your blurry vision and panic you aren’t sure exactly what happened but somehow you tripped ending up on the floor. You were trying to get up fast before you got trampled on but you kept getting pushed and shoved down until you felt someone grab your waist and pull you up. Instantly you recognized the familiar cologne and tucked your face into Jungkook’s shoulder as he quickly pulled you through the rest of the airport.

On the plane where it was quiet and safe you started full on crying. You felt so silly but you couldn’t hold it in any more.The fear and anxiety became too much.

Jungkook came over handing you a bottle of water and some ice for your bruised knee. He rubbed soothing circles on your back as the plane took off, “It’s okay Y/N. It’s okay. You’re safe now. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry I didn’t protect you.”

“It’s not your fault. You did everything you could.”, you whispered starting to feel a little better.

After a while you managed to fall asleep and take a small nap. When you woke up Jungkook was still sitting next to you. He was staring intently at your face.

“Stop looking at me. I’m always so ugly when I wake up.”, you chuckled feeling much better than earlier.

“Impossible. You are never ugly Y/N.”, he whispered.

He was fidgeting with his shoe lace. Something you had picked up on being a nervous habit of his.

“Hey Kook, is there something on your mind?”, you asked.

He waited a moment before nodding, “When we get back from New York I’m going to tell the company that we need to end this fake dating thing. I can’t do it any more.”

You felt like you wanted to cry again but you swallowed it down because maybe he thought you were too weak or why would he want to be with the girl who tripped an embarrassed herself and himself, “O-Okay. It’s up to you.”

“I just…I’m so selfish”, he chuckled, “I’m not going to keep putting you in danger though. I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you Y/N, especially if it was my fault. What happened back at the airport…that was a wake up call. I’m sorry I ever suggested this.”

Your brows furrowed in confusion., “What do you mean you suggested this?” You were under the impression this was all the companys PR team but now it seems like he had a part of it.

His cheeks turned a bright red before he ran a hand through his already messy hair, “Well I guess I might as well come clean now.”, he turned his body to look at you fully, “Y/N when the company suggested this fake dating thing I was against it at first. But then…then I thought maybe I could use it as an excuse to spend more time with you. I’ve always thought you were really cute and sweet and kind and I had a bit of a crush on you. So I convinced them to get you to be the woman I fake dated. I was too shy to ask you to hang out so I thought it was a way to spend time with you and get to know you better.”, he made eye contact with you for a brief moment and you could see the fear in them. He continued, “I think I have always been in love with you. I love you more and more every day.”, your heart was practically beating out of your chest at his confession. You tried to stop him but he continued, “And that’s why we have to end this. I don’t want you getting hurt because of me. You don’t deserve this.”

He looked as if he was about to cry and it made you want to just cuddle him and make everything go away. Instead you chose to grab his hand and hold it on your lap, “Jungkook I love you too. I have for quite a while. Honestly, I didn’t think you would ever see me like that so I thought this was all your company’s idea.”, his shoulders seemed to relax a little at your words so you went on, “I know that dating you comes with lots of hardships but I think the positives greatly outweigh those negatives and I don’t mind going through them. If…if you want to I would like to continue to date you, but maybe actually date and not fake date anymore.”, you chuckled.

That got a big smile out of him too which warmed your heart. “I would love to keep dating you Y/N.”, he nodded. You cuddled in closer to him spending the rest of the flight talking and laughing and enjoying each other’s presence.

When the plane landed he had already arranged for a car to pick you up straight from the tarmac so that you wouldn’t have to endure the stress of walking through the airport with him again.

When he finally made it out front and jumped into the car he smiled at seeing your face, “I missed you Y/N.”, he then leaned in and kissed you like it was nothing new. “You already got into the lemonade didn’t you.”, he chuckled after tasting it on your lips.

“Kook we were only separated for like ten minutes and of course I did. You know lemonade is my favorite.”, you giggled.

He leaned over and rested his head on your shoulder, “Doesn’t matter. It was ten minutes too long.”

You gave the top of his head a kiss as the car sped off to your new destination.

[jazzy-art-time]

Thanks

CW: cooties

It’s that Turkey thanks day here where I’m at. So I figured I would be that cringe fucker who gets overly insightful on today for a change.

But I figured I would sit down and tap for a second for anyone who would glance over at me today.

This past year has been, a lot for me. Good n bad and stuff but.

I wanted to say thank you to my friends. My dear friends.

I don’t think I would be the man I am right now without you and your support.

Like literally, prolly wouldn’t have been Raymond without you. You helped me test out everything and become comfortable with becoming Raymond. I can never be thankful enough for that, I’m closer to who I am and want to be even. I cannot express my thanks enough for that.

You guys support my artwork and my characters so much. You guys let me yap for so long and you let me send so many paragraphs for hours about my shitty ass stories and OCs. You’ve listened to so much Jolene Bennet and Pinky BrainRot you deserve awards. It seems silly but it means a lot to me that you guys are willing to listen to me insanity. I’m not that interesting of a person, so my characters are all I’ve got going on, it just means a lot that you are willing to listen.

You have also had to bear witness to the Birth of Jarble as well as its continued development. Which is very special to me due to why I made Jarble to begin with. It means the world that I can feel comfortable sharing it, developing it, getting tips and bouncing ideas back and forth. Jarble went from a shitty AU I made to escape from everything into something I hold dear to me. It’s special now, it might have died out and fizzled. So thank you for helping me create something special. Also the fact that I’m willing to share my writings with you guys show how much I trust y’all, my writing sucks and you are the few who get to witness it. I will say however, fuck you for the sheer amount of Jeden emojis, he haunts me and you do this to me I’ll get you /silly

As well as you guys aren’t afraid to call me out on my shit. If I’m doing something wrong, if I’m being out of line or overreacting… you call me out. You come to me and talk and help me get better as a person.

You were in the trenches with me when I became a Aggressive, Distrustful person who snapped and was going crazy because I was being stalked. Helped me gain the courage to speak out when I got doxxed by Travis. Stuck with me when I had to change antipsychotic medications and I went absolutely batshit and had to go to the hospital. When I was stuck in bed for nearly two weeks because I was practically almost dying. You guys… for whatever reason. Stuck with me.

You didn’t have to stick around, I never would’ve judged you if you did. But you stuck around, you came to me and laid it all out on the table. You told me when I was being unreasonable or that I was hurting you with my actions. You helped me when you didn’t… really have to.

And you continue to help me, I’m a better person now and I know that. I don’t think I would’ve gotten as better as I am without you.

You support me, you help me when I’m lost or confused, you talk to me… you share Garfield things with me or if I’m upset you send a picture of your dogs or just.. you do so much for me.

I am forever thankful for everything. I’m not good at expressing emotions, I never have been. So perhaps it’s all just nonsense what I’m saying or maybe I’m repeating myself, I don’t know.

But thank you.

For everything.

I love you guys and I wish I could be better at explaining it… that way I’m not dropping a mile long scientific paragraph on you every few months

And a thank you for my Followers as well.

Which sounds like, cocky or something to say. I don’t know, feels weird standing here going “AND TO MY FOLLOWERS” but it’s hm.

ANYWAYS.

Thank you lot for sticking around!

Within the past year and a half I’ve… been different! I cut off all social stuff for the longest time and then went radio silent a lot posting wise. Almost all my blogs kinda went nonexistent. I deleted a lot.

And then I randomly went “hey guys look at this story I’m working on called Jarble. I will tell you absolutely nothing about it.”

But y’all still? Stuck around.

Which I know I’m just like, another guy on the dash posting stuff. So perhaps it isn’t that deep as I’m making it sound? I don’t know.

BUT REGARDLESS. You guys stuck around!

You guys watched as I went insane over a AU that I never said anything about. Which might’ve been annoying when you guys asked and I just never answered because I got self conscious lmaO. Yet you guys still showed interest and shared support!

When I decided to update my blogs again, welcomed me back and showed support when I expressed interest in doing stuff again.

Even welcomed me back when I decided to attempt to be social again and join discord servers! Which was… hard for me and a 1000% awkward! Cuz I went insane and then shuffled back like a fool. Yet! Here I am!

You guys keep supporting me, sending me asks and supporting me and my work despite it all

And I thank you for that! I appreciate it and it makes me feel special when you guys appear to show genuine interest in my dumb characters and stories…

I know I’m just another idiot on the feed, but it means a lot to me that you stick around and glance in my direction.

So all in all

Thank you guys.

To everyone.

End of cooties

Edit: also thanks to my fiancé I guess. Whatever. You’re sitting right across from me and I might throw a cracker at you. But you alright I guess. 🙄🙄 don’t choke on the Turkey BabyGirl

[lizardkingeliot]

rewatching iwtv with one of my partners, and they also love these trainwrecks—but we just finished season 1, and rewatching that scene when Lestat grabs Claudia off the train... I think that may be the cruelest he ever is to her, which is saying a LOT. Do you think we're gonna get extra context about that scene in season 3, or would you bet it's just one of those "yeah Lestat can be Like That" moments? Because it seems pretty hard to square with his ~everything~ in the season 2 finale

Ohhhhh boy I'm so glad you brought this up because @tothevines and I are rewatching right now and when we got to that part my immediate reaction was holy shit Lestat HAS to die now. Like??? Yeah. That was it. The cruelty was truly unmatched. Not only forcing her to go back home but waving her trauma in her face like that... oof.

Lestat is complicated tho!! I do absolutely think we're supposed to take that moment at face value. The reason Lestat works so well for me as a character is because he IS capable of such cruelty. Especially cruelty driven by his deep need for love. Cruelty driven by his need to not be abandoned. The one thing Lestat needed more than anything in that moment was for Louis to not be sad anymore, for him to not fall into the state he was when Claudia left the first time. He knew it would be even worse this time around. He simply couldn't risk it...

I guess in order to square it you have to look at the whole picture of who Lestat is as a character. Which Rolin has said recently we've seen, like... 80% of on screen. He's a lot!!! I don't consider Lestat at his worst to be the full Lestat any more than I consider that sad man in the tattered robe eating rats in a cottage in the finale to be the full Lestat. He is cruel he is a monster he is a big crying baby who needs everyone to look at him and pay attention to him RIGHT NOW he is a lover he is a hopeless romantic he is on his knees begging Louis for just one kiss he's tender he's giving he's a monster who takes great lustful joy in the art of killing...

What's funny is if you asked me to compare Lestat to one real life person I know... I would say my father. At least a few very particular aspects of his personality. I absolutely hate my father. My father is a monster. I haven't talked to him in 20 years and will gladly dance on his grave when he's gone for the things he did to me. I relate to Claudia so much in this sense. But Lestat is also my favorite character on the show. Possibly my favorite character ever at this point??? I love him so much it's insane. And I guess it's because he's fake and my father is very much not that I'm able to feel that way. But that might also be a big reason why I find his cruelty and his most monstrous moments to be so cathartic to watch...

Anyway. Not the point of this ask. The point is HE REALLY IS A LOT!! He is everything. All the good and all the bad. The best and the worst any creature could ever be. He is fully driven by instinct and emotion and LOVE and the need to never be abandoned. And more specifically, to never be abandoned by Louis, the one he loves more than he's ever loved anyone.

[blueaetherr]

just a thought

pairing: mason mount x fem!reader [she/her]

warning(s): none

summary: the one where the maid and man of honour talk about the future prospects regarding their relationship

author's note: last one for while 'cause of exams (as if i don't already post irregularly :/), but anyways, enjoy!

Managing the wedding of your friends was definitely a task, especially if it's your first time and you are just one or two people. And as the maid and man of honour, Y/N and Mason had to come to learn that over the last few days.

There was more to learn than anticipated by the pair. It wasn't simply just being paired together as a bridesmaid or groomsman or being the right-hand person for the bride and groom; there was so much to those roles. It was providing emotional support the night before, making sure the wedding wouldn't collapse last minute, advising the bridesmaids and the groomsmen to always act accordingly, being the adults amongst the adults and probably much more.

And when you put all of that together, it was, of course, exhausting and challenging for two people, taking more than enough voice and strength and tolerance. Being the voice of reason for those solvable problems, being the spontaneous therapist moments before the wedding ceremony—they weren't for the weak, one needed strength beyond the physical one to manage well.

But it was okay. 'Cause when it was all said and done—the pre-wedding celebrations, the downtime the night before, the mini breakdowns and moments of doubt before the ceremony—there was the wedding ceremony, and it was wonderful. The bride, the husband, the family and friends and the culture embedded into every last detail of the event, from the decorations to the attires worn by everyone. When you get a result like that, there was no reason to allow any negativity to persevere during a happy moment.

As the day passed quickly, so did the wedding celebrations, from the ceremony and the pictures all the way to the reception that continued well into the night; when Mason and Y/N were finally able to find one another again.

Sitting by the private beach, it was a mellow environment they were given—a nice sight to witness, one easy to picture even with your eyes close. Comfortable with their place in the sand, appropriately loud music from the venue further up to the beach, waves kindly sliding over and under one another, the laughter of kids playing close by the shore accompanied by older siblings acting as babysitters and vibrant and solace everywhere you chose to look.

Mason knocked his knee against her own. "How have you been?"

Upon arriving at the wedding destination, the bridesmaids and the groomsmen were immediately split so they hadn't had much time together. Of course, Mason and Y/N had been seeing each other through the days, passing one another during wedding rehearsals or while passing on messages for the newly-wed couple when they weren't allowed to see each other. Other than that, their reasons for seeing one another wasn't actually rooted in seeing one another; either it was out of coincidence or for the purpose of the wedding.

Y/N swayed her head as she sat up, humming. "How was my day?" She had to say the question out loud to think. All of her thoughts were still fixed to be centred around the bride and her needs. She hadn't really had the time to focus on her own self, to process her own state of mind. "It was... it was really good."

"Is that so?" A smirk began to form across Mason's face. "I'm hearing you ladies went crazy with the bachelorette party, and a certain someone went even crazier. I didn't get any names but I'm gonna assume—

Y/N shoved Mason into the sand, causing him to let a laugh. "And that's how it's gonna stay: an assumption."

Mason took in a deep breath as he sat up, still letting out some of his laughter. "You don't have to hide it, love. I know you well," he picked up the bridal bouquet from the sand, the ever one his girlfriend had caught a little under an hour ago. "I mean, c'mon. We all saw. I even recorded it if you don't remember."

"And I had fun with it, Mason."

"And you had fun with it, of course," he kissed her cheek before offering the bridal bouquet, "that's all that matters."

Without hesitation, Y/N took the bouquet in her hands. She attempted to appear nonchalant about it, trying to observe the flowers in an unbothered manner. Though as soon as they were fully in her grasp, she couldn't help but smile shyly as she let her eyes admire the bundle of flowers, twirling them between her hands in delight and excitement.

And that—her happiness—quickly became Mason's happiness. Not only for the flowers' positive impact on Y/N's mood but also it got Mason wondering and thinking about various things surrounding, well, him and Y/N.

"Does it ever get you thinking about certain things..." Mason played with the sand, "being a maid of honour and all?"

"Thinking about what?" Though as soon as she lifted her eyes, she noticed his eyes on the flowers and then it all came to her. That thing we called marriage. "Oh... about that?"

"Yeah, I guess," Mason shrugged. He wished he could've introduced the conversation a little better. 'Cause it was far too awkward and strained for a topic that required mature adults to be handled with fluency.

"I don't know... Like what?" Y/N, like her partner, was lost in the conversation; lost in what she should say, lost in what about the topic would be discussed, lost in where the conversation would be going 'cause really, it could go in almost any direction.

"Anything. I guess just anything about us in the future," Mason rubbed his palms against his shorts as he inhaled a long breath. "I always wonder, like, if we do stay together and persevere, what will things for us be like? Where will we live? How will our relationship change for the better or worse? How many kids will we—"

Y/N quickly raised her hand, placing it on Mason's shoulder. "Woah, woah, woah, relax there," she said with widened eyes. Suddenly, she was more in tune with the conversation than the last few minutes. "Maybe we're thinking a bit too far into the future."

"Yeah, that was a bit sudden." Mason let himself think for a moment, his eyes wondering on the young kids passing by. "Let me ask a better question: what would you like our wedding to be like?"

"Our wedding? I mean I don't know." And yet all the words would eventually come to her so easily, without much thought. "Something small and nice... like enough for family and friends, but not enough that everyone everyone gotta be there. Maybe somewhere close to home, a cosy picturesque location, you know? Just a place where we could also spend our honeymoon in peace, adventure small towns and villages, and maybe some historical places," Y/N leaned back in her place a bit, "But yeah... that's just me."

"That's the whole point, Y/N. It's your wedding," Mason chuckled as he pulled his girlfriend close to him, "You're supposed to do and have whatever you want."

"I know," she exhaled, too joining with the laughter, one they both found restoring and soothing. It wasn't enough to counter all the stress from the past week, but enough to relax into the conversation just a bit more. "I just didn't anticipate this conversation tonight." Y/N really didn't. After managing the wedding of her friends over the last few weeks, she hadn't really had much time to stop and wonder about her relationship's future and outlook. She turned to Mason and wondered, "What about you? It wouldn't just be my wedding."

"I don't really have anything in mind to be honest. Besides, if it ever comes to it, you know, getting married 'n all—which we will—it doesn't matter what we have or where we are. Luxurious wedding, getting eloped—the part where you say I do is more than enough for me."

Surrounded by vibrant colours and a lovely, mellow environment, the couple turned to one another and found themselves smiling galore at each other, exchanging a lack of words as they observed one another, heads tilted in wonder. In those gazes—in their eyes—there was admiration and happiness and affection that were all genuine and bracing to experience together.

In truth, there was this admiration and happiness and affection because there was a lot of conviction in their words towards the other. And considering their minds for the last few days have been racing for their friends' relationship, it was refreshing to talk about their own. On a day when nothing seemed to be about them, it was nice to dedicate a small moment to themselves.

[venbetta]

Okay, I wanted to talk about this animation by @/Johantly on Twitter

It's 1:31 animation of Freddy in the Endo Daycare having his existential crisis, it slaps so hard... and I just need to ramble about it. (I was trying to add pictures, but it's not loading properly, so... wahh)

The first few seconds have me interested. It's something about the way Freddy moves, feels natural/humanoid. The cut of the camera to a lower mid shot angle gives it a similar feel to a TV show/movie.

Something about the different shots adds a nice a flow that tickles my brain

I also love the use of the voiceline and how it was edited, as its one of those lines that Freddy asks at some point during the game; as if he's having an epiphany about what Gregory saw earlier.

He brings it up with such casual skepticism (his tone makes me giggle), despite saying, "I believe you if you say you have." Hearing that line in game makes me wanna flick him- don't question me, Freddy, I know what I saw >:(

Anyways the natural cut off of dialogue just works, his little quirks of speech and movement in this animation makes him so human like.

The model for the endo daycare is so well crafted that the setting is dark but has a nostalgic vibe. The original game model is cold, dark, and creepy, but for some reason, when I look at this one, it feels different. Nostalgic, as I mentioned, and kinda warm in a weird way. I don't know. Conceptually it's fucking creepy with the endos hanging around, but honestly this gives me the vibes of a college kid going back to his childhood room and reminiscing on the memories. It would be interesting if we find out if the glams remember their training.

Side bit, his mention of never being allowed in the endo daycare is interesting, despite saying he might have been born there. Knowing what we know from HW2, seeing the programming process of juvenile endos is a delicate yet fast-paced one. I've had personal headcanons about what it was like, and Hw2 sort of confirmed it.

It's kinda odd that Freddy isn't allowed to be in the daycare, though, but maybe the existential dread is probably the reason why the techs don't let the main mascots go back there.

Freddy's soliloquy has always made me feel for him, I like listening to it. He sounds so introspective and frantic about it, so seeing it animated with his movements was.. cathartic? (Help I've watched this thing 9 times now)

The glams themselves aren't that expressive in the game. They experience emotions, yeah, but I mean physically emoting is rare or pretty stiff. The most facial expressions we get are in the beginning cutscene, maybe the dissamble ending, and the front entrance cutscene- Freddy being at the forefront. It's kinda hard to emote as a robot, but this animation does a great job with the limited range of expression.

Using Freddy's ears, hands, eyebrows, and his shoulder pads to emote is impressive. I've seen a lot of good security breach animations and they all have their own ways of making the glams emote, and I always love watching them (I'll probably link my favorite fan animations at the end). Also, this one of the few animations I've seen where they actually rigged Freddy's eyebrows to move. Hell yeahhhh!!!

But how Freddy acts in this just gives me joy. "Monty in a different" as he looks over himself, reaching to touch an endo as he says, "They are all the same." He's just so sweet acting.

And the music swelling adds so much more to his monologue. The crescendo as he says, "If I am mass produced, am I still art?" HITS SO FUCKING HARD

I made a joke tweet comparing the shot of him reaching up to the light with Ariel in Part of Your World, but it honestly has that same vibe. He's dramatic, he's whimsical, he's dumb, and also a little annoying, but it's okay. We still love him.

The light shutting off as he breaks out from his dread is kinda funny, though, and Gregory awkwardly standing there adds to it.

Sorry, this is such a cornplate thing to say, but he also uses a contraction when he says, "Greg, I'm not nearly that annoying, am I?"

GOD HES SO SILLY

Then Gregory nodding in response, causing him to get a little droopy is comedy. It's not gut busting humor, but it's the little things that make me giggle okay. Freddy needs to be self-aware, and damnit, if a 12 year old doesn't humble him, then what's the point?

Get called cringe like the rest of us, Freddy.

Okay, the fazerblast commercial doesn't have any reason to go that hard, but it does. The opening sequence for it with Freddy standing there is so... GGHHFHG :33

I'm normal.

He's so cool. I know I called him cringe just a second ago but I'm fan regardless of his flaws okay. This makes me want to play fazerblast with him.

The running, jumping, and shooting he does is *chef's kiss*, even if it's at Monty's expense. Bro should've had a fazerblaster...

Also their faces... it's like Freddy doesn't even remember doing that commercial.

I love how embarrassed he gets, it's so cute-

And it's hard to tell if Gregory is impressed by Freddy's agility or by how cheesy the ad is. The cut was like a cutaway gag in The Office or Family Guy.

Either way, this is peak. I loved this animation, it's only been out less than a week and I've watched it officially 9 times... (and maybe more)

It gives me a sense of comfort. The amount of time and effort put into something that was a small side project is an incredible feat, and it has so much jam packed in a one and half minute animation. It feels like it could be a scene from SB or even a movie. It's so fucking good. This is just a self indulgent, cornplate post and I don't care what anyone says about it. I just like rambling about fnaf sb stuff especially if Freddy is involved.

Here's the playlist full of my favorite security breach animations (some are music videos)

Anyway, thanks for reading..

[plscallmeeren]

C A U S E F O R A H O W L E R

Hermione Jean Granger x Reader

Request: yes @JulzLovDraco4Eva

Summary: you've been friends with the trio since first year (You, being Draco's twin sister, sorted into Gryffindor...... ouch) and obvs ur parents don't approve. You've been hiding the fact that you've been dating Hermione for two years now. It's the day before battling Voldemort lol

Warnings: Swearing; allusions to sex; family disowns child

Word Count: 1.9K+

You stared at Draco, groaning when he wouldn't back down. "Oh, come on!"

"Father said I should keep an eye on you, so I will."

"Well, since you like taking his words literally so much - he said an eye. Not both, at all times, relentlessly and to the point of murder with motive."

"You're so dramatic," he scoffed, crossing his legs formerly on the bench opposite you. Beside him, Blaise snickered, nibbling absently on his jacket potato.

"Priss," you spat back. "Don't know why father thinks your 'keeping an eye on me' will do any good, anyway..."

"I don't know, to protect you?" he deadpanned, as if this were blatantly obvious.

"You're a pussy, Draco. And I'm three times as good as you at Charms and DADA."

"That, my dear friend, is definitely true," Blaise added helpfully, smiling at Draco as he glared.

"Okay, well, on that note, I'm off," you announced, standing up briskly.

"Well, I suppose that means I'm off, too," your twin replied, trying to stuff as many beans down his throat as possible before he had to go.

"Don't be stupid. You're not finished, and I need to go to the bathroom, anyway."

"Yeah, but-"

"What are you gonna do? Guard the door? Or are you going to join me? We can go to the haunted one, if you want. I know Myrtle loves you-"

"Fine! Okay! I'll meet you at the courtyard after, alright?" he retracted quickly, throwing up his hands.

You only grinned, taking even prouder strides when you heard him mutter 'I'm never finding her again, am I?' to Blaise.

Walking the corridors, you could feel your shoulders sagging, your fingers fidgeting with the fabric of your robe. It had been a long week. A long month. Maybe a long year. You felt like crashing into bed, Hermione in your arms, doing nothing for days and only really getting up to cook something for her.

You could picture it perfectly: A bed the size of a small room, the two of you surrounded by books that you'd read to each other as the record player lazily hums 'San Tropez' by Pink Floyd. A week spent fucking, eating home-cooked, Mediterranean food, reading, talking, fucking again.

But that was a dream for another life. Maybe there was still hope for it sometime else - a time far removed from war, from exams, from your goddamn father.

"Password?" the fat lady asked coldly.

"Flobberworm," you murmured, stepping through the round door immediately after she swung open.

"There you are!" Harry's voice surprised you inside. "We were wondering whether you had relocated to the dungeons for good now, given Malfoy's insistence on-"

"Oh, shut up," Ron interrupted, slapping his shoulder. "She's tryna get away from him, not meet his fan club."

"Right. Glad to have you back."

"I've missed you," Hermione said sweetly, throwing a leg over your own as soon as you sat down.

"Get a room," Ron complained, grimacing. He had dealt a deck of Exploding Snap and was looking very unhappy about his own cards.

"And here I was thinking you'd turned over a new leaf of empathy," you sighed, wrapping an arm around Hermione's shoulders.

"Yeah, right. Ever since Hermione called me a teaspoon, I thought I'd give up."

"Room for improvement is no reason to forgo emotion entirely. In fact, I'd argue the fact that it bothers you shows that you already have."

He scowled, making a ridiculously bad move to top things off. Harry grinned, giving you a thumbs up.

"Hey, you okay?" your girlfriend asked after a moment, in which your sprightly face must have slacked. "You look a bit... worse for wear."

"I'm fine. Just tired of my bodyguard, that's all. Pretty sure he has less muscle mass than me, though, so I should probably come up with a new title."

"'Tis true," she agreed. "But still... you wanna go for a walk? Just the two of us? We can steal Harry's cloak until we're out of your brother's way?"

"You can what?" Harry piped up, failing glaring at you because of how miserable he was making Ron.

"Well, can't we?" Hermione asked testily, looking unimpressed.

"Of course, I just wish you'd ask first."

"Well, here I am, asking."

"Yes, you're welcome to take the sole material inheritance I have received from my father, also my insurance for survival should one Dark Lord choose to search for me this fine afternoon-"

"In that case," Hermione smiled, "I'll be glad to take it off your hands." The two friends stared at each other momentarily before she took your hand, dragging you up to the boys' dormitories.

Twenty minutes later you were walking by the lake, feet dangerously close to the dark water.

"So, what is it?"

"What's what?"

"Whatever is ruining your mood."

"Oh, so you're saying I'm not delightful? Uncalled for, that is."

"Oh, come on, just tell me," she said impatiently, glaring at you.

You smiled, swinging your arms restlessly. "Well, as I said, I'm not too chuffed my brother is following me around everywhere, making me live in fear."

Hermione only stared at you, unimpressed, waiting.

"Yeah, I guess I just feel guilty still, in a weird way. Not that there's anything remotely wrong with dating you, it's just... it's our two-year anniversary and all I could think about while planning was how to celebrate incognito. It's kinda... tiring, I suppose." You looked back at her, chewing on your tongue. "Sorry, I'm rambling."

"No, I understand. And there's nothing to feel guilty about. If my family were so district, if they would disown me if I told them who I loved, I know I would... well, I don't know what I'd do, but I know it would be hard to handle." She smiled at you, the kind that made the skin around her eyes crinkle and her freckles catch a different ray of sunlight. "Let's just make today special."

"I wholeheartedly agree," you said firmly, placing a hand on her waist and stopping her. "Which is why I'd like to give you this."

You pulled out a small, indeterminate box with a ribbon around it. The size and shape didn't hint at what was within, so that you could watch as Hermione's brow furrowed, clever eyes searching for clues.

"Can I open it?" she asked timidly, quickly untying the ribbon when you nodded. Inside lay a multitude of things: A necklace with 'Hermione' spelt in Japanese characters (へみおね), a small line drawing you had created of the two of you, and a folded list of book recommendations, each addressed to a certain aspect of her. (For example, to her expression when she is in 'survival mode': The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. To her fast-paced wit and love of puzzles: The Collected Stories of Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.)

"(Y/n), I-"

Before she could thank you, you slid off one of your rings from your index finger, one that you wore every day, placing it on her middle finger instead. She stared at it, as if it were a legendary artifact that might still surprise her.

Hermione looked around then, but there was no one. No one to stop her kissing you like her life depended on it.

"Hermione," you murmured, detaching herself from her mouth, ignoring the surprising turn, "you sure you wanna do this here..."

"Thank you," she whispered instead, slinging herself against you. "Thank you so, so, so much."

"I'm glad you like it, darling," you managed between kisses, lips colliding in waves. Your other hand leaped to her waist, holding her impossibly close to your body. Hers travelled the muscles of your back, reaching for the plane of your nape where her fingers surpassed your hairline.

"'Mione," you groaned, hardly gaining her attention.

"Dorm?" she managed.

"Yeah," you panted, reluctantly breaking away.

"Right."

The way up to and through the castle under the cloak was hard, even while walking past your brother. Hermione kept whispering 'thank you's and 'you're perfect's and kissing you, anywhere, everywhere, and it took a ridiculous amount of willpower not to rail her next to the Hogswatch team.

Your shared dorm was mercifully empty, and the cloak was quickly discarded. You pulled her down onto the bed by her hips, groaning as she grinded against your lap, face connected to yours.

She slipped off her jacket with the box inside the front pocket, followed by her jumper, the heat within you now deafening.

"Are you sure?" she asked, pained to have jeopardized the mood. "I know we haven't done anything since your brother's been following you around and I understand if you're worried he'll find out somehow-"

"I'm sure. I have you, don't I?"

Hermione's lips were on yours again, hungry, insatiable, moaning your name-

A sharp cry emanated from the door, some sort of terrified surprise.

You jumped up, one hand still on your girlfriend's thigh, but Draco was already leaving, running away - his job was done, and it had not been to protect. You loved your brother, but you knew just as well that he would do anything to feel more secure in his own home.

You knew that that home would no longer be yours.

"I can see him in the Owlery right now, trying to understand how this could've happened under his watch," You laughed dryly, staring at the open door. Hermione stepped before you, closing it.

"I'm so sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for."

And yet, mere hours later your father's owl arrived - a grey one, shivers of green down the spines of his feathers. The letter was easy to remove from his leg and you knew before opening it that it would be loud. Hermione cast a silencing charm on the room wordlessly, because even she knew.

And the letter lived up to its namesake, a howling cacophony of your father's disappointment. It tore itself apart with the knowledge that it had forbidden you from returning to your childhood home. You did not move to clean the remnants away. You didn't dare look at Hermione, who you could picture with a hand over her mouth and a look of pity in her eyes that made you want to disappear completely.

"You have me," Hermione said eventually, meekly, as if she wasn't sure how much that was worth. "You can stay with me and my family. You know you'll never be alone. I mean, if you want to. I know so far I've already been cause for a howler."

"Yeah," you whispered. You didn't know whether you could manage more in that moment.

"Yes?" she asked, seeking confirmation, but you didn't miss the hint of betrayal in her voice.

"Yeah, that would be great," you stuttered, trying to sound sure of yourself. "Merlyn knows I'll need a new bodyguard with less muscle than me."

She smiled, even though it was watery, and gently leaned in for another kiss.

You knew you had chosen right. You knew this might someday lead to heaven on earth. You knew Hermione was forever for you.