landopoet

[landopoet]

hey, me again. clocking into my clove fic lover shift that never ends actually, i’m always on the job. and this job is pretty cool, you should join by reading this fic!!!

anytime, anywhere - lando norris x childhood sweetheart!reader

summary - lando fell in love when he was ten years old, heres small moments of that love over the years.

warnings - kisses, panic attacks, small amount of violence & lando being a SAP

wc : 8k

authors note - hi! as always, enjoy! reblogs & likes are always hugely appreciated!! lots of love, clove!

ten 

The fluorescent lights of the afterschool program shined bright as you were sitting at the snack table, quietly picking away at the food your mom packed for you this morning. It was 5:30, most kids had been picked up by their parents or siblings. Leaving you and four other kids left, one was a curly haired boy who was sitting not far across from you. Working away at his homework. 

You remembered he was in your class. Lando, you remember, was his name. He was quiet, and he sat far across the room from you, so you haven't spoken to him much since meeting him in september. 

One of the coordinators for the program, Allie walks into the room, having left minutes prior to take a phone call, she looks at you with a sympathetic look on her face before sitting down next to you carefully.

You already know what she's going to say 

“Hi sweetie, that was your mum” she began, taking a deep breath trying to keep her voice low. “Your parents are going to be a bit late today, your mum said dad will get here as quick as possible” she continued. 

This wasn't the first time your parents have called, they were late most days, you tried to understand that they have unpredictable jobs, with both your mum and dad being doctors at one of the top hospitals in the country. 

You huffed, nodding before pulling out a colouring book that was given to you by your teacher as homework, the same homework the brunette across the room was doing. 

Down the table, the other three boys seemed to have heard your conversation with allie. 

“Ooooohhh y/n’s parents abandoned her!” one of them taunts, the boys burst into giggles before Allie sends them a stern face. they don't let up. 

“Isn't this like the third time this week? They must forget about you alot” they poke while their laughter grows louder 

You see out of the corner of your eye, Lando looks up from his book, his eyes looking to you while your head stays down, trying to focus on your coloring.  

Tears prick your eyes as Allie sends them to the hallway, probably to tell them off, some more. The sound of your sniffles fill the room and Lando watches you wipe your tears with your sleeve before he stands up and makes his way across the room and places himself right next to you. 

“I like your colouring” he says shyly, like he isn't sure what to say. You turn to him, his green eyes looking into yours as he offers you a warm, genuine smile. You find yourself smiling softly back at him, like it was contagious. 

“Thanks, yours is okay” you giggle mischievously, looking down to see his work. His colours were slightly different than yours, but you both had the same idea with shades and detail, his jaw dropped in faux offense. 

“Hey! They look the same!” he says, you both break out into a fit of giggles, playfully chatting while you continue with your artwork. 

When Allie returns, she finds you two in a very in depth conversation about the movie you watched in class today. Crayons scattered around the abandoned colouring books, she smiled softly at the two ten year olds as she watched a special bond form between them. 

You chatted about everything, Lando told you about his newly found hobby in karting. How he wanted to try competing and was mostly excited to miss school for races. You told him small details about you, his attention never wavering as you spoke. 

You both chatted until the rest of the kids had left, leaving just you two and Allie, who was sitting quietly in the corner playing some game on her phone. 

“You should come to one of my races” he declares, “i'll let you drive my kart” you cringe slightly, frowning at the boy. the thought of operating the machinery scares you slightly. “When you win a race I'll go karting with you.” You say shaking your head at him, 

The door opened and in walked a lady whose eyes found lando almost instantly, lando had his back to the door since he was fully immersed in his conversation with you. 

“I think your mums here” you say as Lando whips his head around to see his mum. He smiled, getting up from his seat and hugging her tight. You felt your shoulders drop as you realized lando would now go home, leaving you alone. 

“Hi sweetheart, ready to go home?” she asks her son, who hesitates before he answers. Lando made eye contact with you, the girl he’d found a new friend in and felt quite sad to leave her here, when he got to go home. 

Looking at his mum, he shakes his head “no i wanna stay with y/n until her dad comes.” 

His mum looked at you, shrinking into your chair with all eyes on you. She had a sparkle in her eye as she watched him make his way back to you. She could tell her son had grown fond of you by seeing how he continued your conversation as if his mum wasn't there.

“so, if I win a race, you will come karting with me. deal?” he holds his small hand out, you smile, showing him a toothy smile that made his ten eight year old brain stop in time. Wanting to freeze frame it and paste it onto his eyelids. 

You shake his hand 

“deal.” 

Fifteen  

You were anxiously scuffing your feet into the asphalt of your local karting track. Lando had won his first karting race long ago, he was actually set to win his first series this year. But you two had never gotten around to getting you into a kart and on track with him. 

Since that day five years ago, you two had been inseparable. He took you to races on the weekend, and you had helped him catch up in school when he needed help. 

You even started going home with him after school and your parents began to just pick you up at Landos. 

Lando knew he liked you, he had known since he met you. Since your hand brushed against his when you both reached for the same crayon. Your smile was contagious and he swore you grew flowers wherever you walked. 

What started as a small elementary crush– over the years had bloomed into something bigger, something Lando couldn't explain just yet. 

Lando was so excited to show you karting, you could see it on his face. He was bouncing on the balls of his feet while he pulled you through the garage with his hand held in yours. You tried to ignore the butterflies that have made home in your stomach years ago when Lando started getting touchy like this with you. It started with his hand lightly brushing your shoulder in conversations, hugs that lasted longer than they should’ve while his head was tucked snugly in the crook of your neck. 

he leads you to a small single seater that you assumed was yours for the afternoon, “this is what you’ll be driving, i'll be in my kart with you the whole time” he explains, showing you how to control it and the proper steering technique, while throwing in a couple tips. His hand is still laced with yours as he tells you about his own kart. 

You loved seeing him in his element. Watching him race was your favourite thing. You admired his face as he spoke, the freckles you've grown to love topped with his curls that he was still learning to care for properly (after you had begged him too). 

“You with me?” he nudges your arm, shaking you out of your daydream. You nod 

“yeah, just zoned out a bit.” you reply, 

When you walked out in fireproofs and a karting suit, Lando felt like time froze, the world around him spinning to a halt as his gaze found you. He thought you looked beautiful everyday, but seeing you in a race uniform made his mind go fuzzy. 

His breath caught in his throat as he watched you walk over to him, holding a helmet and gloves. His green eyes sparkling at you, like you were the only girl in the world.  

He helped you with your helmet, his fingers brushing under your chin as he clipped the chinstrap, sending shockwaves down your spine. When you were secured he gave you a light tap on the side of your head before you both got in your karts, starting your engines. 

-

You were slowly getting the hang of the machinery, the kart vibrating underneath you as you took each corner with more confidence as you went, Lando staying steadily out in front of you. Turning his neck around to check in on you when you two would rush down the straights. You understood why he enjoyed this so much, the thrill of taking a corner slightly too fast, pushing the kart to its limit. 

You almost enjoyed it too much. 

The barrier came quickly, you hit a dead spot on the track, your kart skidding straight into the make-shift padded wall. When Lando watched the yellow flag fly out, he immediately felt his stomach drop, turning around to see you wobbling slightly in your kart. 

Stopping his kart safely off the track, his feet hit the ground as he sprinted to you, dropping in front of you, flicking his and your visor up, his eyes scanning yours frantically as he watched tears brim your eyes. 

“Hey, you okay?” he asks, his concern evident in his voice as he checks you over. “Where does it hurt?” you groan as he moves your arm slightly, cringing as your muscles contract from the sudden shock. 

“Im okay, just annoyed, im sorry” you huff, tears threatening to fall from your eyes, you knew how much lando wanted to take you karting and show you his world. And now you've ruined it by crashing. 

“No, no none of that.” he soothes, helping you out of the kart and back to the garage. Sitting you down and helping you take your helmet off. You looked adorable when he saw your messy hair from the balaclava. Lando had never wanted to kiss anyone yet, but at this moment he was coming very close to kissing you. 

It was like an itch that surged his whole body, the desire he felt to do all the things a couple does. He wanted to try them, with you. The hand holding while walking to classes, the nights spent wrapping in eachothers arms, he wanted all of you. 

 he wanted to learn what being in love was like, and he only saw himself learning with you. 

“Are you sure you're okay?” he asks cautiously, concerned that your adrenaline hasn't allowed you to fully feel any pain you might be in. 

“Yeah, i think i'll just be sore” you sigh, taking a sip from the water bottle he retrieved from the cooler for you, sitting himself on the floor in front of you. He's looking up to you like he's mesmerizing every inch of your face, studying every mole and freckle. 

Lando chuckles, “oh yea, you're gonna hurt like hell tomorrow” he jokes, you kick him lightly as you break into a fit of giggles, your laughs filling the garage with a sense of joy. 

The mechanics nearby smile at the two of you, infatuated with the way Lando acted in your presence. On a normal race weekend, he was focused, almost unable to see past the task at hand. With you, he was light, laughing, almost as if you showed him what happiness was. 

Your laughs die down and you catch yourself staring at the way his nose crinkled as he smiled. How his curls sit perfectly even after being smushed in his helmet. Your cheeks go flush while you fidget with the hem of your fireproof. 

Lando gaze locked onto you, he watches as your face focuses on your fingers, smiling softly before he stands up, offering his hand out to you. 

“c’mon, lets make my dad get us ice cream” 

You break out into a smile, linking your fingers with his before standing up, you two making your way to find Landos dad. 

Even though karting didn't go how he had planned, Lando felt today was a successful day nonetheless. Because he got to spend his day with you, showing you his other world he loved, the world he was building and working towards, imagining what the future would be when he climbs his way to the top, and he knew he wanted you to be right there with him when he did.

“Thank you for coming to my rescue” you say playfully as you walk with him towards the car, he just smiles, his curls bouncing as he strolls beside you.

“Anytime, anywhere.” 

Seventeen  

The lights were dimmed as you walked into the house of your friend's house, music was pumping through the speakers providing background noise to the conversations you could hear flowing throughout the room. 

Your eyes scanned the room, looking for the familiar head of chocolate curls who you refused to admit was the whole reason you had come. Lando had been away karting for the past week and you haven't seen him, when you spot him, he has his back turned to you fully engrossed in a conversation with Max Fewtrell. 

Max's eyes catch your from over landos shoulder, a small smirk creeping into his face as he announces your entrance.

“ayeee!! There she is!” he shouts, landos head whips around, slightly confused to who Max is referring to, when he spots you, his eyes light up. You two lock eyes and it's like the world falls away for a moment as you take each other in. He noticed you had straightened your hair differently, training a soft curl at the end of your hair, framing your face perfectly. 

He's on his feet in seconds, making his way across the room to close what felt like a ravine between you. Mumbling a soft hey while engulfing you in a hug, it felt like coming home after a horrible day. His arms squeezing you softly as he tucks his head into your shoulder. You hug him back, closing your eyes as you both linger in the hug for a moment. 

You don't realize that it's been long until Max is next to you, he clears his throat loudly, startling you guys apart. He smiles, greeting you with a brief hug that has Lando sending him a slight glare. You failed to notice the brunette pinching his friend's side afterwards, max letting out a small whine. 

You told Lando how much he missed school, he shrugged it off with a laugh, you both knew he had given up on completing school. Joking that you were getting the degree for both of them. The three of you had always been close, going through schooling together since you were young. Though Max knew there was a bond between you and Lando that he would never be able to fully understand. 

You two understood each other without even having to speak, if Lando was upset with a race, Max often would text you as they drove home, you’d be waiting for them on the porch with snacks and a movie. Lando falling into your embrace before you settled on your own end of the couch, one of his favorite films playing on the tv. 

If Max looked over to you two, he’d see Lando absentmindedly playing with your fingers, he’d see you slowly running your hand through his curls, something you knew would calm him down 

You always knew lando needed comfort after a bad result, but you failed to understand that all he ever really needed was you. 

 “I'm gonna go grab a drink, do you want anything?” you ask softly, pointing to the small mini bar that was set up in the corner, one of the guests dramatically pouring non-alcoholic drinks as if you were in a club. 

“Monster pleasee” he drawls, smiling widely as if mimicking a little kid asking for candy. You roll your eyes with a smile before turning to Max, who shows you his already half drunk redbull. 

You turn away, sauntering your way to grab the beverages, lando and max watch you as you make your way. Once you're out of earshot, Max drops his smile before turning to smack lando in the arm. The boy yelps in pain, grabbing his arm with an unamused look on his face

“Oww!” Lando groans as Maxs face stays serious. 

“Why haven't you told her” he asked, leaving no room for bullshit. Lando and you had been dancing around the idea of a relationship for years, and he was tired of it. He was tired of seeing his two best friends hopelessly in love with each other and choosing to ignore it. 

“It's just not the right time,” Lando argues, his voice small. He tried so many times to tell you, to blurt his feelings out like a case of word vomit, to just scream i love you in your face. But every time, the words died in his throat at the possibility of you not returning his feelings. 

“Bullshit.” max counters “you two have been all heart eyes since we were what? twelve? I don't care whatever story you’ve run in your head, she loves you Lando and you both need to open your eyes and see it” he commands, sending a blow straight to Landos heart as he exhales with a sigh, his gaze fixed on you chatting with the boy handing out drinks. 

“What if it doesn't work out? I'm never here anymore max, how is that fair to her?” Lando says, a sense of longing evident in his eyes while he looks at you.

 Max’s offense crumbles slightly, but he didn't let up “she loves you enough to fight for it. She just needs to know you're willing to fight for it too.” he offers, you make your return, holding two cans of monster, the two boys staring slightly.  Like they had just been caught doing something they shouldn't. You frown slightly, your hand rising to cover your face.

“Do I have something on my face?” you ask worried, your hand rubbing along your features as you search frantically. Lando chuckles, lightly grabbing your wrists to halt your movements 

“No no,-” he breathes through a laugh, his touch sending sparks up your forearms  “you look beautiful” he said lowly, like it was only for you to hear. 

 You exhale deeply with a small laugh, sending him a soft, genuine smile that had Lando seeing double. 

This boy was done for. 

– 

The atmosphere had shifted since you arrived, the party was now in full swing as bodies filled the house, the base of the song vibrating underneath the floor. You and Lando were standing in a corner, your conversation light as you both nursed your drinks. 

Lando was explaining the new video game he and max had started playing when he was– quite rudely– interrupted by a boy approaching you, it was the same boy from the drink bar, whose name you learned was james 

“hi y/n, i just wanted to say that i enjoyed our conversation earlier. It's always a pleasure chatting with you” he smiles, one of those smiles that has a cheshire cat behind it, one that makes you slightly stiff next to lando. James didn't acknowledge landos presence, acting as if you were standing next to a plant pot. 

“Oh, thank you james.” you say, noticing lando’s eyes have turned to the black and neon can in his hand, fiddling with the pull tab. He's trying not to listen, but the way you shifted towards him slightly as James kept talking to you made him wary. 

“–hey you wanna get outta here?” James offers. 

Something in lando snaps when he sees the cocky smirk on his face.

“Woah,woah,woah, let's slow your roll here, mate.” he steps slightly in front of you, puffing his chest. 

“Last time I checked I wasn't talking to you” James barks back. his voice became louder as you hid behind lando. 

 “she clearly doesn’t want to be talking with you” he argues, you could see Landos fists balling at his sides. the monster abandoned on the windowsill behind you. Landos neck grows red as the anger bubbles underneath his skin. 

“Yk’what, why don't you let me and the lady have a conversation, yeah?” he says trying to push past Lando, his tone dripping with smugness. 

Oh that had Lando seeing red.

His fist connects with James' jaw, then his nose. Sending him to the floor, you gasp as James groans, before getting up and raising his fist. He doesn't have the time to think before Lando sends another blow to his chest, knocking him down for good. 

Two guests go to James, picking him up to place him on the couch as Max rushes over to you and Lando, his eyes falling to Landos hand.

“Shit mate–” he exhales, scanning the room for a way out “–c’mon let's go get some ice and fix that, you have to drive this weekend.” 

He leads you upstairs to a somewhat secluded bathroom, shutting the door as Lando sits on the sink, the pain from his hand evident in his movements. 

You haven't spoken since the fight, slightly shaken up from watching your best friend almost did beat the living daylights out of someone. You didn't want to think about what could've happened if James was able to land his own punches. 

You press toilet paper to his bleeding knuckles, and Lando hisses from the pain of you pressing on the inflamed flesh. Dropping his head onto your shoulder as max ruffles through the cabinet.

“score!” he exclaims, holding up a bright red first aid kit. He pulls out the alcohol wipes and hands them off to you. 

“m’sorry, this is gonna hurt” you say quietly before you clean the wounds, lando squeezes his eyes shut at the sting, his uninjured hand finds your waist, using it as a lifeline. 

Once the wounds are clean you begin to wrap his hand, your touch light as max hands you gauze, but nothing to secure it with. 

“Max, I need tape or something–” you mumble, focused on the task at hand. Lando watches as your tongue pokes out of your mouth while your eyes –which he's just noticing are slightly glossed over– are focused on carefully covering the wounds. 

Once Max makes his way to find you tape, you and Lando are left in silence, spare from the muffled sound of music still coming from downstairs. You were mumbling soft swears as the gauze would slip in your hold. 

“um- i'm really sorry–” lando breaks the silence, you look to him but he won't meet your eyes, “–i didn't like where he was going with that, but if you–uh..wanted him though, i understand” he says low, his eyes fixed on his lap while you look at him slightly shell shocked.

You scoff, almost like a laugh “you’re an idiot” he looks up, green eyes pouring into yours, hyper aware of the hold you had on his hand and his on your hip.

“Wh-what?” he breathes, confused. You send him a small are you stupid? look before saying what you’ve been trying to build the courage to say for years.

“I don't want him, god did you see his greasy hair?-” you roll your eyes, lando chuckles softly before you continue “i want you, you muppet”

Lando froze, he stared at you with nothing but admiration, you stood in front of him with a smile on your face, he swore he could’ve died right there. He exhaled deeply as a smile grew wide on his face, reaching both ears as he pulled you closer.  

“Thank god because i'm not sure what i would've done if you didn't” he whispers, his eyes flicking to your lips, tilting his head down slightly. You leaned in slightly, his breath fanning across your face before he locked his lips onto yours. 

The kiss was slow, but hard, like the crescendo of a musical piece. Years of longing being poured into it, your lips slotting together perfectly. Moving in sync as your free hand cups his jaw. He pulls you closer by his hold on your waist, humming slightly when you bite his bottom lip.

 The world seemed to have faded away as he deepened the kiss. His tongue swiping across your bottom lip, asking for access you happily granted. You kissed him until you were breathless, smiling against each other's lips, you swore you could see sparkles in landos eyes.

“ten year old me is so happy right now” he mumbled against your lips, smiling so wide as you giggled. You kissed him again, softer this time, drinking in the kiss that you had dreamt about for years.

You kissed him multiple times in that bathroom, the pain in his hand forgotten as his focus was solely on you. 

That was, until the doorknob jingled before Max opened the door, holding tape and a bag of ice. You step back quickly as Max halts his movement, it didn't take an idiot to put two and two together. Your puffy lips, landos slightly messy hair, and his poorly wrapped hand that had been perfectly wrapped when he left moments ago.  

All he did was smile, before handing lando the ice to hold to his hand. He hands you the tape before moving back to the door, lingering in it before he leaves.

“I am so, so, fucking happy for you both.” is all he says before shutting the door, leaving you alone once again. 

You turned to each other slowly, staring for a moment before you broke out into giggles. Once you both quiet down, you rewrap his hand, maybe stealing a kiss or two (or three) while you work, making up for all the time you could’ve been kissing him over the years. 

Lando watched you lovingly, thinking to the future. Yes he was scared, he was scared of what this meant with you in school and him racing. But he could see that you wanted this, you wanted him. if he had to die fighting to make you two work, he was gonna sure as hell try. 

Nineteen

The crisp autumn air turned your nose red as you walked through the streets of London towards Max and his girlfriend, Pietras’ flat. It was Saturday afternoon and Lando was in Italy, it was Lando’s first year in F1, you two had been dating for two years now, and had your own flat in London you called home. 

Every race weekend, it became a tradition for you to watch qualifying and the race with Max and Pietra. Ordering pizza while you shout at the tv against anyone who dares to overtake your boyfriend. 

Opening the door you waltz in, announcing your arrival before shrugging your shoes off, placing your coat and bag in the mudroom. Your sock clad feet pad across the floor into the living room where Max had set up the broadcast. 

“How's he doing?” you ask, grabbing a blanket and snuggling into the couch. “He's doin’ fine but I'm not sure we're getting out of Q2” he answers, a sigh escaping his lips as you frown. Lando had told you the struggles he's been having recently with the car, not being able to find that balance he needs. 

The media knew it too, it felt like every time you checked your phone, someone had something horrible to say about the man you loved. You knew it was getting to him despite the brave face he put on. 

Your boyfriend was the type of person who wanted everyone to love him, the amount of scrutiny was eating at him while all he did was try his best in the car he was given.

 It wasn't his fault the car he was given was a tractor.

You watched anxiously as the timer ticked down, a minute left in Q2. Lando was setting his final lap, nibbling on your fingernails as he rounded the final sector, crossing the line to land in P14. his teammate Carlos sainz, landing in P7. 

You deflate, knowing lando wouldn’t be happy with himself, you knew him too well. After years of watching him in F3 and F2, you know what was running through his head and it killed you that you couldn’t be there with him. 

When he was home earlier in the month he told you one night how the one thing that scared him was people thinking he didn’t deserve his seat, this result certainly didn't help him with his self doubt. 

“He's going to be so upset” you mumble, turning your ringer on while you wait for his call. Another small tradition you had was if you weren't in attendance, the minute he had a moment alone, he was on the phone with you.

Max nods silently, Pietra sighing as she makes her way to the kitchen to order pizza for you all, silence stretching throughout the apartment as you watch the final moments of qualifying. 

As the commentators congratulated the pole sitter, raving on about the final laps that had been revolutionary all you could think about was Lando and how he was beating himself up over this. 

You could see the tweets now, the hate, the scrutiny that was going to flood your socials the second you looked, just as you went to pick up your phone, it vibrated from lando calling you, the goofy smile of his contact photo smiling back at you as you answered the call.

“heyy baby!” you say, walking into the guest room for some privacy, sitting down on the foot of the bed. The line was quiet for a moment before Lando responded with a soft “hey” his voice wobbled as he spoke.

“You drove really well lando.. don't beat yourself up over one bad quali” you say softly, keeping your tone light. Soft sniffles came from Landos end of the line, your heart squeezes as you hear him cry softly. Lando wasn’t a crier, so when he did, you knew he was close to his breaking point.

“I can't do this anymore,” he sniffles. “I don't even want to know what they're saying right now.” he cries. You listen to his broken sobs as tears escape your own eyes. You hated being so far away from him while he was hurting like this, he was alone and vulnerable and that made you want to scream. Wishing you could crawl through the phone and get to him. 

You debated telling his trainer, getting someone else in the room with him to make sure he was safe, but you knew he needed to let it out first. You’d tell Jon later, right now you needed to be there for lando. 

Landos breathing starts to become ragged as his sentences come out in short breaths, you hear the panic attack coming before it fully hits him, his voice was shaky as it grew quieter. His words dying in his throat before he could say them, you could hear his breathing becoming more frantic. 

“Lan, baby i need you to breathe for me” He was sending himself deeper into a panic and it only worried you more. You felt useless just listening while he struggled to find a breath.

“I ca- i cant” he chokes out, his sobs echoing through the phone as you begin to frantically text Jon. Your fingers shaking as you message the man, tears flowing down your face.

You: 911!

You: get to landdo now he's habvin a panic attack on the phone wit me 

You: please jon im panicjking myself listning to him

Jon: On it.

You keep assuring him through the phone, trying to say something– anything that will calm him down. Telling him to unzip his race suit, asking him what he can smell, see, hear, or taste. None of it worked, the boy was breaking down in your ears and you felt helpless while waiting for Jon to find him. 

You hear the door open on the other end, the phone falls to the floor as the murmurs of Jons voice filter down the phone. You don't hear much for a few moments, taking the time to compose yourself, wiping your tears with the sleeve of your landos hoodie. 

“hey y/n, he's all good now, i'll have you call him back in a bit. Are you okay?” Jons voice crackles through the phone after a while, you exhale a sigh of relief, clutching a hand to your chest. 

“Yeah… sounds good, thank you jon.” you say softly, hanging up the call.

You splash some water on your face before returning to max and pietra. The two noticed something was off with you immediately. 

“You okay? How is he?” Max asks slowly, you didn't say anything. He could tell something was wrong when tears flooded your eyes. Closing the distance, he pulls you into a hug as a sob escapes your lips, you clutch onto him while you cry. Tears pour down your face as you explain what just happened, Max listens with sympathy written all over his face. 

 Hes silent for a moment, before an idea pops into his head “Let's get you to italy.” he says, determination in his voice as he grabs his phone, immediately googling flights. 

“what- but i don't have anything packed- what if there's no flights” you ramble, slightly shocked he was so set on this idea, he shakes his head, finalized in his decision that you needed to get on a flight as soon as possible and he didn't care how.

“Go home and pack, you don't need much it's only a night- SCORE” he turns the phone around, showing you a flight to Italy “leaves in four hours, if we hurry.. we can get you there” he says. You two lock eyes, a new sense of determination blooming inside you. You needed to be there for Lando, and you were going to get there.

It all happened so fast, one minute you were packing clothes into a duffle bag, and now you had landed in Italy, the flight was quick, two hours from London to Milan. You sat in the cab, the streetlights fading by as you made your way to landos hotel. 

The hotel was beautiful, wishing you could've come on better circumstances, thinking back to all the times you and Lando would be talking late at night, hushed whispers about what it was going to be like once he reached F1, all the places you’d go together. 

You never expected what reality would end up being. 

You stood in front of landos hotel room, Jon was standing next to you. Since the phone call, you had asked Jon to stay with lando. Explaining to him why incase of an emergency, you wouldn't be available for lando. He immediately agreed and also offered to walk you up to the room upon your arrival. 

Once the door opened, and you saw him. His eyes looked drained, his hair was messy from him running his hands through it. When he locked eyes with you, they widened so big they could’ve popped out of their sockets. 

He stared at you for a moment, trying to decipher whether or not you were really here, actually in front of him at his hotel in Monza. Once he felt you wrap your arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace, it hit him. 

It hit him hard.

“Oh my god” he breathed as he melted into your arms, his emotions bubbling over again as tears escaped his eyes. He had never felt so relieved to be in your arms, not since that moment in a bathroom years ago, it was like you were an angel sent straight for him. 

He pulled away to get a good look at you, you were wiping his cheeks softly. He still couldn't believe you flew to him. 

“Are you actually here, or am I dreaming?” he asks, a wet chuckle escapes you both as you realize you're also crying. 

“Im here, i'm real” you smile, pulling him back into a hug as you smooth the hair on the back of his neck. “I couldn’t stay in London when you were here in this state. It would’ve killed me.” you sniffled. His hands wrap around you, holding on like if he’d let go, you'd disappear, and he'd wake up from this nightmare with you still in london. 

He pulled back, placing a soft kiss to your lips before mumbling many “i love yous” into your mouth as you kissed him back, soft and slow. Forgetting about Jon standing a few feet away from you two. He turns away slightly, letting you have your moment. 

You pull away echoing a soft “sorry” to Jon who just smiles softly, shaking his head in dismissal as Lando wraps his arms around your waist, activating his clingy-ness. 

You say goodnight to Jon as you and Lando head into bed, the events of the day taking their effect. Lando immediately wraps his arms around your waist, nuzzling his face into your shoulder, placing soft kisses on the exposed skin before resting his head on your chest. 

“Thank you, for understanding me more than I do myself” he mumbles sleepily, his breaths even out as he finally looks at peace with his mind. Your smile is warm as you place a light kiss to his forehead before finally resting your eyes, having your boy in your arms. 

And when you wake up to a text message from Jon, attached is a video of you and landos reunion he recorded secretly, you smile, cropping the video properly to post on your instagram story.

Posted is a small 10 second clip of Lando realizing you were standing in front of him, then showing the hug you two shared. Rocking back and forth as intelligible murmurs are exchanged between you two. 

captioned for you, anywhere, anytime. 

Twenty two

The sun was shining down on your face as you perched yourself on a lounge chair on the exquisite yacht you get to call home for the summer break. You sported a bright orange bikini as you read your book while you listened to the waves below you.

It was peaceful, until you heard the stomps of two smaller people, followed by the stomps of a bigger person. You looked to the door to see Mila and Athena squealing as they ran around the deck, followed by none other than your boyfriend, who was chasing them, pretending he was a sea monster. 

“Look! There's auntie, she’ll save us," Mila shouts as the two girls make a beeline for you. You quickly place your book down so the girls can climb on top of you, hiding from their overly enthusiastic uncle. 

“Ohh auntie can't save you now! She's on my side” he says playfully while you begin to tighten your grip around the girls, not strong enough to hurt them, but tight enough to where they would struggle to break free. 

The girls giggle as Lando ‘rounds the couch, the girls wiggling in your arms, sounding cries of betrayal while you laugh at the trio's antics. He makes it to your pile of laughter and starts tickling the two girls until they are breathless.

Once he ceases the tickles attack, you let the girls free. They hop to the ground, their baby feet bouncing off the deck as they make their escape from the tickle monster, but to you he's just lando. 

Lando lets out a sigh as he sets himself down on the couch next to you, placing his arms around your shoulder. You had been on this yacht for a week and he had already worked up a tan, he looked divine, the sun hitting his face perfectly as he turned to look at you before placing a kiss on your temple. 

“y’know, it’ll be nice when we have our own munchkins running around a yacht one day” he says, far too casually, as his hand traces your shoulder. You both knew you wanted kids, but also knew being twenty two, in the height of landos career was not the right time for either of you to even think about creating your own bundle of love. 

Before you could respond to him, Max waltz’s his way onto the deck, sunglasses propped on his face as he spots you two. “Don't you two look cozy” he jokes, acting like you two haven't been head over heels for each other since you were small. It was a running joke for years, Max loves to tease you two about anything and everything.

Today was no different 

“oi! LN,” he says, lightly smacking landos sunburnt shoulder, causing the brunette to wince. “When are you proposing, I've got bets placed man!” he says with a faux serious tone. 

You giggle at him, you had discussed this before, you had an list of milestones that you and lando wanted to complete in a specific order

Championship

Marriage

Kids 

“You act like we haven’t basically been married for years max” you say, playfulness evident in your tone as Lando pulls you closer by the shoulder. Lando knew Max was just joking, but deep down part of him did want to forgo the list years ago and just make you his wife.

He's known since before you were officially dating that he’d marry you, it was obvious to him, you were the only option. The only person he saw his future with, the woman he goes home to, the mother of his children, you checked all the boxes of perfection and he was anxious to put a rock on your finger to solidify it for eternity. Devoting himself to you completely. 

Lando observes as you and Max move onto a different topic, he observes every detail about you, the way your nose crinkles when you smile, how your freckles pop when you spend more time in the sun, the way you always manage to speak with a heartwarming smile etched onto your face. It made him dizzy the way he knew you better than he knew himself. You were his everything, there is no lando without you. 

“Lan baby, you with us?” you ask, noticing he spaced out slightly. Nodding he smiles, placing a kiss on your hand, interlaced with his.

“Yeah, just thinkin’” he says simply, thinking for a moment before he taps your shoulder, 

“Wanna go for a walk?”

– 

You walked down the side of the boat, your fingers interlocked as the sun casted a golden light on your skin. Lando rubbed his thumb over your knuckles as you walked to the edge of the boat, overseeing the mediterranean behind you. 

Lando is quiet for a moment, his eyes following the horizon while he thinks. You can see in his eyes he's piecing his sentencing together but struggling– after a while, he speaks up. 

“Max got me thinking,” he pauses, taking a deep breath “I wanna change the list.” 

Your heart stops, looking up at him to find anything on his face that says he's joking, you meet his eyes already looking at you, 

“Are you serious?”

He chuckles, running a nervous hand through his hair, “I've never been more serious about anything in my life baby,” you feel tears welling up in your waterline. “I've known my whole life that I wanted to marry you, I don't want to let a championship decide when.” 

He brings a hand up to cup your cheek, your bottom lip trembling while he continues. 

“You're it for me baby, I can’t remember what my life was like without you in it and I don't want to have to learn. You know me better than I know myself, I am hopelessly in love with you and there's nothing that will ever change that,” you were full on crying now, he takes a moment to collect his thoughts, 

“–loving you is my greatest achievement, no championship could ever come close to how i feel about you,” Lando feels a lump form in his throat as he tries to finish his mini speech before he becomes emotional. 

“Let's get married” 

You cry softly before you cry out a yes and Lando feels a surge of love flow through him. 

“Yeah?” he smiles so wide as you nod, tears freely flowing down both your faces as he pulls you into an earth shattering kiss.

He kisses you like you’re his last breath of fresh air— soft and sensual, holding your face with such gentle care like you’d break if he let go. 

You pull away for air, giggling into each other's lips, stealing more kisses as the sun begins to set over the sea. The air felt warmer as you kissed your fiancè, you kissed him again, and again, you kissed him so many times you forgot where you were. 

That was until Lando pulled away sharply with a gasp. “Wait here” he mumbles before he takes off running back into the yacht, you take a seat while you wait for him to return, slightly confused to where he ran off to. 

Moments later he comes back, hands held behind his back as he makes his way over to you, a cheeky smile spread across his tanned face. 

“I'm sorry, your actual ring is at home.” you choose to ignore that fact for the time being. “But I do have this,” he chuckles as he pulls a small ring pop from behind his back. 

You laugh at the small candy as he opens it, placing it on your left ring finger, placing another kiss to your lips, you throw yourself into his arms, returning the kiss in full force. 

“It's perfect, thank you.” you mumble into his mouth. 

He rests his forehead against yours, his green eyes pouring into yours— a window to his soul showing nothing but love for you as he pulls you closer, his smile giddy. “We're getting married!!” he exclaims, you both giggle as you revel in being newly engaged. 

You think back to when you were kids, before the fancy cars and extravagant races, you loved him before he made a name for himself, before the outside voices. When it was just you two on a karting track, nobody watching to see where he goes next. 

you will continue to love him in the highs and lows of his career, as he shows the world what he's truly made of. You will forever be there, holding his hand, being his first phone call. Continuing to support him throughout it all, believing in his dreams as they’ve now become yours. 

You will love him when it's over, when it's just you two in the quiet mornings, for when you have nowhere to be. When you're old and grey living in the countryside in London, hand in hand on the porch side of your family home, grandkids running around in the yard. 

Like a handprint over your heart, Lando had plastered himself over every inch of your existence. His love hidden in plain sight of places you’ve yet to even realize. you loved this boy with every fiber of your being, and you would love him in every universe, in every past life and through the next. 

You will love him anywhere, anytime. 

~~

i hope u enjoyed, thank u so much for reading <3

[landopoet]

I JUST REMEMBERED I PUT OCON ON ONE OF MY F1 FANTASY TEAMS! THE ONE WITH THE NO NEGATIVE CHIP! CHAT AM I COOKED?

you’re a little 🤏🏻 cooked

[landopoet]

josie, you precious little angel ☹️🫶🏻 i love this fic so much and you definitely will, too!! so go, go, go and read it, i promise you won’t regret it <3 (i mean, c’mon, how could anyone regret seeing what josie and her parents were up to?)

flights and family - lando norris x wife!reader

summary - after an eventful first half of the season, a trip home is just what you and your family need to reset

warnings - nothing! some mentions of lando being overwhelmed due to the 2024 season, but other than that just fluff & kisses

authors note - haiii heres a josie fic i wrote while i was on a plane a couple months ago, i hope u enjoy <33 im trying to get back into the swing of writing so gimme reqs and ill try and get to them as quick as possible!! lots of love, clove!

apart of the josephine elliot norris chronicals

“babe wake up..” kisses flutter across your face, pulling you out of your peaceful sleep. you open your eyes to see your husband's emerald eyes overtop of you. 

“we gots’ to go! its airport time in t-minus 1 hour“ he whispers, lightly pinching your bicep to spark your body awake. 

“uuuggh what time is it?” you groan, rolling over to grab your phone, 3:46am. your flight boards at 6. You fall back into the duvet, eyes slowly closing as sleep reaches out to pull you under again.

“baby! up! i’ll get josie”  he shouts through whisper, marching around your bedroom in his baby blue sweatpants and matching hoodie. You giggle, throwing the covers over, finally getting out of bed. 

lando speeds down the hall towards your daughter's room, he creaks the door open into the room. dimly lit from the flower nightlight hung on the wall next to the pretty pink letters spelling josephine above the small pink race car bed. his daughter, a recent graduate to the race car bed, was curled up under her blankets sleeping softly. 

lando lifts his daughter into his arms, the 3 year old stirring slightly, whining at the disturbance of her slumber. 

“it’s just daddy,” he shushes, pushing the curls out of her face so he can see his own eyes looking back at him “you ready for the plane baby?” rolling the bright pink suitcase down to the front door where yours and his await along with your carry ons. The quiet babbles of your daughter chatting with him about her dream fill the quiet of the early morning. 

monaco was rarely quiet, the city almost never sleeps. the peaceful blanket of calm reassurance, lando was sure today would go smoothly. 

you just needed to be ready on time. 

he loved you, his wife, the love of his life, mother of his child, number one supporter. 

but my god your punctuality needed some work. 

Just as if you heard his thoughts, you came bustling down the stairs with your bag in hand, sporting your light grey aritzia sweatsuit that Lando bought you as an early anniversary present. 

“okay, i’m ready” you huff, blowing your hair that fell in front of your eyes. lando chuckles at your disheveled-ness while your daughter rests her head on his shoulder, quickly falling back to sleep. 

you melt at the sight, smiling softly “she’ll be okay right?” you ask, it was josie’s first time flying, your husband rubbing her back before nodding 

“Of course she well, she's so zonked she won't even realize we're in the air-” you chuckle “and I booked a jet. we couldn’t be more safe.” he assures you while handing you some suitcases to take to the uber that’s arriving downstairs. 

“as long as we get to the airport on time” he jokes, giving your bum a light pat while you lock the door. You scoff at him playfully, even after being married for four years and having a child, Lando still has his ways to make you giggle like a teenager.  

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

making it through the airport was quick, josie had fallen asleep on lando in the car. Making the check in easy when you didn’t have a 3 year old asking every question imaginable. you and lando loved her imagination and curiosity, taking it as a small parenting win when you had the time and energy to answer those questions. 

4:45am, however, is not the time to answer those questions 

security was quiet, perks of flying early and in the middle of the week. the attendants recognized your little family letting you through the fast lane just for some entertainment, in the mist of the night. 

the sun was just making its appearance over the horizon when you took off. Josie was curled up in landos lap, completely passed out. 

“I can't wait to be home in London,” you say softly as you rest your head on your husband's shoulder, your gaze fixed on your little bundle of love whos sleeping in his lap  

Lando hums, eyes fixed on his daughter who’s been subconsciously squeezing his fingers in her rem. 

“yeah, i can’t wait to see my parents” he adds “i made max pick us up so we can surprise them at breakfast” 

one week ago, you and your husband made an impromptu decision to drop everything and take a trip home. You both have been overly stressed and it was taking a toll on the two of you. Lando has been at the fighting front of the championship for months while you have been juggling being a first time mother and handling your own responsibilities at work. 

it all came to a breaking point when lando had broken down after coming home from a tough race weekend. frustrated with the results, the pressure and overall the backlash from outsiders, had him sobbing in your arms the minute he walked through the door. soon after you both came to the realization that you needed some well deserved rest and relaxation during the summer break.  

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

“ahh they’re they are!” Max shouts from the car when he spots you two, earning a glare from you, pointing to the girl still sleeping soundly in landos arms. 

“Whoops, sorry!” He sucks in a breath through his teeth. helping you load the bags into the boot while Lando secures Josie in her car seat. You always thought fatherhood was so beautiful on him, you fall in love with him all over again seeing the way he was with josie. only proving to you that this was something he was meant to do. 

The London streets were still quiet, the faded radio music providing a background as you and Lando chatted with Max, catching up while he navigated through the city towards landos childhood home. 

When you arrived, you took Josie in your arms trying to wake her so she could greet her grandparents properly. 

the girl stirred in your arms, mumbling incoherent words into your neck and lando giggling from behind you, watching the girl wake. you always loved watching him with josie, the man adored his daughter. from the moment she was born she had him wrapping around her finger the very second he saw his own eyes staring back at him. 

“hi baby girl wanna go say hi to nana and pop?” he asked, that perked Josie up. The toddler always got excited at the mention of her grandparents. 

“ya i’m gonna giv’ them a biiig hug” she mumbled still half asleep, lifting her head from your shoulder while showing a toothy smile to her father. You and your husband break out into a fit of giggles.  

The sweet smell of eggs, bacon and delicious pastries engulfed the inside of the Norris family home. you and lando feel yourself physically relax at the thought of ciscas home cooked brunch. 

soft music came from the kitchen as the distant voices of landos family traveled throughout the home. Providing a lighthouse to the kitchen, the light at the end of a tunnel that you and lando so desperately were waiting for. 

you place josie down, allowing her to walk ahead of you and lando, the girl running into the kitchen, turning to see the girl, cisca halts her movements, gasping at her granddaughter, who she knew lived in monaco. 

“well what are you doing here missy?” the woman asks, alerting the rest of the Norris family of their unexpected guest. you and lando take that as the signal to turn the corner, smiling ear to ear with your hands interlocked, the shocked faces of the norris family say enough that your surprise was a success 

“surprise!”

The room erupted into cheers from the Norris family, moving to give you all hugs. Josie giggling as her grandma picks her up, attacking her cheeks with kisses. 

You greet landos sisters and parents, squeezing your sister in-laws while Lando hugs his brother and his wife. 

“what brings your three here?” landos father, adam asks while giving his son a hug, flo begins setting three extra place mats on the dining table for you as josie is in a very in depth conversation with her grandma. 

“monaco was getting too much so we wanted to spend some time home before the break ends..” lando explained, simply. pressing a kiss to your temple before moving to hug his mum, you watch as he melts slightly into the embrace, tucking his head inside her neck the same way he does with you. 

Cisca places a kiss on your check when she hugs you “you go settle in upstairs, breakfast will be ready soon, you must be exhausted” 

You both sink into the mattress, letting out a sigh of relief. 

“I am so happy we came,” Lando breathes, rolling over to look at you with that loving smile on his face that gives you butterflies, the morning sun hitting his face just perfectly, casting a gentle glow over his gorgeous features. You smile softly up at him reaching out gently to scratch the light stubble he's grown. 

“I'm so happy we came too my love” 

He lightly pecks your lips before the door bursts open, in walks Josie with Mila hot on her heels. The two cousins hopping on the bed before josie lightly jumps on her fathers stomach, causing lando to let out a quiet “oomf-”

“Nana told us to come get you because brekkie is ready!” Mila said before hopping off the bed and running out the room, Josie tries to wiggle out of landos arms but he squeezes her tighter, placing kisses all over her face. The girl giggling at her father 

“Oh no you don't missy!” he says

 “dada let me go!” she shouts through a string of giggles and squeals. 

You three make your way downstairs, joining your family at the table. The conversation flows effortlessly as you fill your tummy with ciscas delicious spread of food. You and Lando make eye contact from the opposite sides of josie who sat between you two, landos eyes were filled with nothing but love as you smiled softly back at the love of your life, a silent agreement that this trip was just what your family needed. 

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

all doneee thank u so much for reading!!

[landopoet]

i’m the biggest fan of the josephine elliot norris chronicles, that is my NIECE and i love her. and i also love this fic, would be a shame if you missed it <3

Omg y/n having to take care of Lando after he caught Josie’s bug 😭 he’s so miserable and jojo feels so bad because she got her daddy sick and just wants to cuddle him all the time. Even worse if it’s race week or media day 🥺

nursed by love - lando norris x wife!reader

a/n: whayayayyaayay this is soso cute thank u for the request ml! i hope i can live up to your expectations <3 !!

warnings - slight mention of throwing up

word count - 730

apart of the josphine elliot norris chronicles

Lando felt like shit, you had been taking care of him ever since he came down with the same bug your daughter Josie had last week. 

Only this bug had hit him harder. 

It started when you woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of Lando getting sick in the bathroom, it was two days after your girls' night. Josie had felt miles better, your husband however…felt like he had been run over by his 2025 mclaren. 

Now, Lando is thankful this hit him harder than his daughter. He wouldn't have wanted Josie to go through the sickness he's currently battling. The problem was the British grand prix was this weekend, and Lando still was bedridden with you trying to feed him light foods. 

You sat on the edge of the bed next to him and he picked away at the sandwich you brought him, you hated seeing the life sucked out of him. His everyday tan skin is visibly paler than usual, the man was a shell of himself 

“Are you sure it isn't time to let Jon or Zak know?” you ask, pushing him lightly. Your husband has been stubborn all week. His persistence to keep his illness a secret from his team and the media was driving you nuts.

He promptly shook his head. “No, I'll be fine for silverstone. I'm racing.” he finalized. You sighed, patting his leg before returning to the living room where you left Josie on her playmat. The girl had her head low and she fiddled with the dress on her babydoll. 

“Mama… is daddy sick because of me?” the girl asked, looking up to meet your eyes and you could tell she felt horrible, the guilt eating away at the little girl. Your heart squeezed at her concern for her father, how she felt personally responsible for Landos illness. 

You sighed, picking her up to place her on your lap in front of you, smiling at your daughter, you explained, “no sweetheart, it's not because of you. he's not angry with you either, he's just tired and weak. Like how you were when you were sick.” 

the girl thought for a moment, her eyebrows furrowed as she came up with an idea, “can i give him cuddles like he did when i was sick?” she asked innocently. you smiled at her, thinking back how lando didn’t leave her side for 17 hours while she was ill. letting her lie on him while they watched movies and eat her bodyweight in popsicles. 

your heart melts at your daughter wanting to help, her empathy was something you and lando were proud of, taking it as a parenting win for yourselves. Smiling softly at your daughter, you stand with her on your hip and walk down to where you just left lando moments ago. 

“Room for two more?” you ask, lando rolls over in bed, sitting up showing his biggest most genuine smile he's shown in days once he sees you and josie, his two favourite girls, making their way into the bed. 

“‘course c’mere jojo” he coos, you drop Josie at the foot of the bed letting her run into landos awaiting arms. The three of you cuddle into the mattress, josie nuzzled between the two of you as you put on a movie. You always loved having your little family under one roof,  a bundle of warmth and love casting a gentle calm over the room. 

“daddy?” Josie speaks up, Lando coughs slightly, clearing his throat before answering “yeah angel?” “im sorry i got you sick” she mumbles, eyes not meeting landos as he makes eye contact with you over her head, you both physically soften, your heart clenching at the josies guilt. 

“You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for sweet love,” he leans down, placing a soft kiss to her curly head of hair. “Besides, now I get to have both my girls to nurse me back to health.” he jokes, tickling the toddler, the room erupting into giggles from josie, her laugh spreading a warmth throughout landos heart.

The following day, lando felt much better he went back on solids and began packing for the race weekend, he’s telling you that he beat that cold so good but you know that all he needed was some josie love to help him snap back to health. 

--

eheheh i hope u enjoyy, thank u so so much for reading !!!

[landopoet]

meet me halfway.

pairing lando x reader, university au

synopsis in which lando doesn’t learn from his past and lets you back into his orbit.

warnings 6k words of pure angst, no use of y/n

author’s note heyhey, here’s part two to somewhere in between, and boyyy is it heavy. hope you enjoy <3

₊ ⊹

Lando sat in a cramped lecture hall.

The professor was talking about something Lando swore he had heard before, so he paid no mind to it as he scribbled down a few keywords here and there. He knew the professor would send out a PDF of his entire lecture to the class, anyway, so why bother?

It was his overall second semester— first full one at this new university— and so far he thought it was fine.

This university was bigger, rooted deeper inside the city, yet it lacked some things. It lacked the cafe he would get lunch at everyday, it lacked the people he calls friends, it lacked… you.

Lando shook his head as if it’d erase the thought of you like an etch-a-sketch. He couldn’t be thinking of you, not when he knew you were probably somewhere doing big things. You had that way of life.

As his wrist sloppily swayed across the page, his attention became divided between whatever words the professor was saying, and the opening of the lecture hall’s door. The entire room brought its attention to the curious personality that just burst in.

She was something of a mess— messenger bag slung on her shoulder, just about to slip off, and hair in a bun, stray hairs wisping from it– in a charming way. She wore one of those green rain coats that look almost denim with rusty gold buttons. She excused herself and found a seat, breathless and stern.

Lando watched as she took the seat in the row below him, and it took a second but he realised that she was… you.

He froze. He had thought over every instance in which he’d see you again— at the grocery store, at a cafe, at some sort of event to which both your universities were invited— but he hadn’t predicted this.

Something inside him sparked. Something forced him to lean forward, just close enough to be in your earshot and say, “don’t you hate the rain?”

The look on your face when you turned around told him everything. The way the colour drained from your skin, yet a certain glint in your eye waved hello and invited him back in. And he wasn’t sure he’d be able to say no.

—

You found yourselves touring the campus of Lando’s university.

He hadn’t changed much since the last time you saw him— his hair still messily cascaded down his neck in wild waves, perfectly complimenting his tan skin. He had retained that same sort of glow to him, but something about him was particularly different. You couldn’t place your finger on it.

There were many questions on the tip of your tongue. Like had he regretted leaving you? Did he miss you? Had he been thinking about you, like you had been about him?

Instead, you asked the simplest question that came to mind. “How’s university?”

Lando shrugged. “It’s fine.”

“Just fine?”

He hesitated, then scratched the back of his neck. “It’s different, I guess.”

You two had stopped in front of a bench and he instinctively sat down. You followed his lead. “Different how?”

A long silence followed. He felt your eyes bore into him like you were expecting some profound answer, like he owed you something grandeur or extravagant. In reality, “the people, they’re not… you.”

Lando watched you swallow harshly, your eyes darting around like it’d blind you to look at him. “What are you doing here, anyway?”

“The professor,” you swallowed again, a lump in your throat so thick you felt it silence your already quiet voice. “He worked at our- my university during the last semester and asked some of us to attend the lecture here, for extra credits.”

Something in Lando’s heart broke— or rather chipped off. He knew it was stupid to hope you’d track him down, find where he was studying and transfer there too, just to try again. He knew it was stupid, but he hoped so anyway.

Lando shoved his hands into his jacket pockets. “Do you think about it?”

He didn’t need to define it. Both of you knew what he meant. It hung above the two of you like a dark cloud, like something so unavoidable that you had to talk about it to let it go— or maybe let it back in?

You didn’t pretend not to understand. “Yeah.”

Lando looked down at his shoes, suddenly finding his shoelaces particularly interesting to look at. “Me too.”

You took a slow breath. “I never understood why you called me that night.”

“I was drunk enough to be honest about this.” He shrugged, trying to seem casual about the least casual thing he’d ever done.

“Honest about what?”

Lando’s eyes finally looked back at yours. “What I felt after you broke me. I never stopped caring about you, just stopped thinking I had the right to.”

The words knocked the air right out of your lungs.

You wanted to be angry, to ask him why he had to admit to this now, why he didn’t fight for you before. Instead, you whispered, “you left.”

“I know.” Lando felt his jaw tighten.

“But you didn’t have to.”

“Yes, I did,” his voice was quiet but firm. “You gave me no choice. If I stayed, I would have kept waiting for something that wasn’t going to happen.”

You flinched, brows furrowing. “That’s not fair, Lando.”

A bitter laugh left his lips. “You never wanted to need me, but I kept hoping you would.”

You felt like you were unraveling, thread by thread. “I was scared,” you admitted, voice quiet. “I didn’t know how to–“

“I know,” Lando interrupted. “Not knowing how didn’t change anything. I called you because a part of me was still waiting for something. I thought you’d at least throw me a bone, but you left me hungry for something I’m not even sure I ever had.”

That evening, Lando fell asleep with a heavy feeling in his chest. Like something was dislodged from its place and the only way to fix it was to shove that feeling down.

Which meant he’d be shoving you down and out of his life. He’s not sure if he’s ready to lose you again, when he just got you back.

—

Lando had been slacking. He had assignments he needed to catch up on, tests he failed, classes he was missing.

He had spent a lot of time in the campus cafe, trying to catch up, to not lose his potential. He lost it when he lost you, but he knows he can regain himself. If Lando just stops thinking about you, maybe then he’ll—

“Hey,” your voice rang in his ears. When he glanced up at you, he saw you were holding two paper cups. “I got an extra by accident, want it? It’s peppermint tea with honey and lemon, heard it’s good for brain power or something.”

Lando bit back a smile at you echoing his words. He watched as you sat down, the pit in his stomach growing as you slid the cup across the table. “Thanks.” He looked back down to his notes, scribbling down stuff from the book in front of him.

It was a lot warmer outside this time around than the last time you two shared a cup of tea together. Last time, you two were a lot warmer to each other, too.

“What’re you reading?” You nudge your chin towards his book.

Lando briefly glances up to you again, the irony of your words hitting him as you speak them. “Just something for class.”

He watches as your shoulders rise with a slight laugh. “Since when do you read?”

It came out a lot bitchier than you intended and Lando narrowed his eyes. “I don’t know. Things change.”

A silence settled between you two as he continued scribbling down notes, trying to ignore the ache in his chest when he’d catch a glimpse of you in his peripheral vision.

“Y’know, I’ll be here for a while. You’ll be waiting for at least a few more hours,” he mumbled as he took a sip of the tea you brought him.

Your shoulders rose and fell with a shrug. “That’s fine, I’m free all day.”

“No assignments you need to do? Readings?” He looked back up at you again, curiosity tracing his features.

“Nope, did that on the weekend,” you slightly smiled. “Just a party later.”

“Party,” he nodded, a bitter taste left on his tongue as the word fell from his lips. “You should go get ready, then.”

“If you don’t want me here, you can just say that.” You spoke quieter, a tinge of pain that came from his urgency to usher you out coloured your voice.

“I don’t.” He hissed, loud enough to twist the knife in your chest but quiet enough not to disturb the rest of the people at the café. “You don’t know what you put me through, what I had to do to get over you not wanting me back. And you just waltz back into my life like we’re old buddies.”

You looked down at your cup, tracing the design with your thumb as Lando continued.

“You don’t get to do that.” He leaned back in his seat. “You can’t just- you can’t expect me to be okay with hoping for something with you.”

“And do you?” Your glossy eyes lock onto him again. “Do you still hope for something with me?”

“Every day.” The admission hung in the air above you two. “I wake up hoping you’ll just call me and tell me you want this as much as I do, and you never do.”

Lando watched you stand, no words left to say. He knew you’d bail as soon as it got real again. There was no lie in saying that things changed, but you hadn’t.

Just as he looks back down to his notes, trying to turn his focus back to his work, the screen of his phone lights up with your contact.

Lando locked eyes with you in the window, you stood on the street with your phone pressed to your ear, him confused. He accepts the call, brings his own phone to his ear and says nothing.

You take a deep breath. “I want this as much as you do.” And hang up, turning on your heel and walking away.

—

Lando found himself at a party.

He’s not sure how he got there, who’s home this was or who the host is, but he knew where the alcoholic beverages were and planted himself there for the evening.

Eventually, he found out that it’s Blair who’s hosting it. She found him in the kitchen, pathetically nursing a cup of whatever he decided to poison himself with that evening.

His eyes were locked on something she couldn’t see.

Blair took a seat on the kitchen island Lando was leaning against. She followed his gaze, eyes finding you in the crowd of people, getting cozy with someone neither she nor Lando knew.

“You could say something, you know.” She turns to him, a look of something on her face that he couldn’t completely decipher.

“What am I gonna say?” Lando turned to her with a certain defeat in his eyes that made Blair’s ice cold heart swell, just the tiniest bit. “I don’t know how to make her realise that I’m here.”

Blair dropped her shoulders. “You’re pathetic. Look at yourself.” She motioned towards him with her chin. “You’re sulking over someone who’s repeatedly shown you that you’re not wanted, and you’re still squirming about her like some lost puppy. Either do something about it or move on already.”

Lando rolled his eyes as he took another swig of the bitter liquid in his cup. It was barely as bitter as the look in Lando’s eye when he locked eyes with you from across the room. “I did move on. And then she fucking showed up at my university.”

“So? She’s making an effort then. She’s not someone who makes an effort, even when it’s for things she wants.” Blair points out. “Don’t give up on her just yet. I believe she’ll make the right choice soon.”

The pathetic curly-haired man takes a final gulp of his drink before slamming the plastic cup onto the counter beside Blair. “I hope you’re not wasting your effort to believe in her.”

That night, Lando went home alone. It’s not like he was hoping you’d follow him out, but sharing a word or two would’ve been nice. Despite him trying his best to trust that you’ve changed, that you want this as much as he does, you haven’t been showing the effort that comes with that.

Little did he know, you had run out a few seconds too late and he had turned a corner before you could catch up to him.

—

Lando woke up to a knock at his door.

With a pounding headache and top-half of his body naked, he opened the door to reveal… you. A scoff left his lips before he could stop it and he dropped his head back for a split second before locking eyes with you again. “What are you doing here?”

“Nice to see you too, Lando.” You tried your best to keep up with your usual personality around him, but it was hard to act like everything was okay when his green eyes bore into you like that. “May I come in?”

“No,” Lando pushed past you into the hallway outside his front door and closed it behind himself. “I’m asking again, what are you doing here? What do you want from me?”

“I want to talk.”

“I have absolutely nothing to say to you.” He hisses. “You’ve already heard everything I have to say.”

You swallow hard, feeling the weight of his words like a slap. His voice is low, edged with exhaustion and something sharper—resentment, maybe. You knew this wouldn’t be easy, but the reality of standing here, facing him like this, is worse than you imagined.

“That’s not fair,” you murmur, crossing your arms over your chest like it might protect you from how much this hurts. “You’re not even giving me a chance.”

Lando laughs, but there’s no humor in it. Just bitterness. He drags a hand through his curls, still messy from sleep, and looks at you like he’s trying to figure out if you’re being for real or if this was just him dreaming.

“A chance?” he echoes, shaking his head. “A fucking chance? Do you know how many chances I gave you? How many times I sat around, waiting for you to notice that I was right there?” His voice cracks, and it’s the first time you hear just how much you hurt him.

Your stomach twists. “I noticed,” you whisper, but it’s not enough.

His expression darkens. “No, you didn’t. You noticed when it was convenient. When it didn’t cost you anything. But the second it got hard, the second I needed you to fight for this, for us, you disappeared.”

You press your lips together, guilt washing over you. He’s right.

“I didn’t—” You pause, inhaling sharply, trying to steady yourself. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, Lando.”

“Yeah?” He takes a step back like he’s trying to put distance between himself and your words. “Well, you did.”

Silence settles between you, heavy and suffocating. You’re standing in the middle of it, trying to figure out what to say, how to fix this, but there’s nothing that feels big enough. Nothing that can take back all the times you let him slip through your fingers.

Lando exhales through his nose, looking down at the floor for a second before glancing back up at you. His eyes are unreadable now, his walls back up. “I think you should go.”

Your chest tightens. “Lando—”

“Go,” he repeats, more firmly this time. There’s no anger in his voice anymore—just finality.

And for the first time, you listen.

—

The next time you see Lando, it’s at the library. It’s not intentional— not this time— but the moment your eyes catch a glimpse of the familiar curls, you can’t look away.

He’s in the corner by the window, scrolling on his laptop with mild frustration painted across on his face. He must’ve gotten here not too long ago, since his curls are still damp from the rain that’s pitter-pattering next to him.

For a second, you consider giving him space. He made it clear that you weren’t someone he wanted to talk to, but then, as if sensing your presence, he looked up.

His green eyes flickered with something unreadable before settling into something familiar— caution.

Your feet work quicker than your mind and you find yourself at his table. “Hey.”

He stares at you for a beat too long, before sighing and leaning back in his chair. “Hi.”

It’s not much, but it’s not nothing.

There’s an empty seat in front of him, and you take a chance, pulling it out slowly. “May I?”

He doesn’t say no, but he doesn’t say yes. He just watches as you slide into the seat, fingers drumming against the surface of the table.

The silence that stretches between you two is nothing short of tense. You know you should say something, anything, but you can’t bring yourself to.

“I didn’t expect to see you here,” you finally say, trying to sound casual.

Lando huffs out a small, humorless laugh. “Yeah, well. I didn’t expect to see you at my apartment the other morning either, but here we are.”

You wince. “Lando—“

“What?” He rubs a hand over the growing stubble on his jaw. “What do you want me to say? That it’s fine? That we can just— what, pretend that you haven’t been throwing me aside until it was convenient for you?”

“That’s not fair, Lando,” you feel your heart clench when your eyes lock with his.

“Isn’t it?” His voice is quiet but firm. “Who do you think this is more unfair to, me or you? You left, you made your choice, and now you decided you want me again. I’m not—“ he exhales sharply, “I can’t do this again.”

“I’m not asking you to.” You lean over the table and grab his hand in yours. “I mean it. I know I’ve hurt you and I don’t expect you to forgive and forget, but I do want to try this with you.”

Lando’s jaw tightens, his gaze flickering to his laptop like he’s debating pretending to be busy just to get out of this conversation. But he doesn’t. Instead, he exhales slowly, running a hand through his hair.

“You don’t get it,” he murmurs. “I’m tired of loving you like this.”

Your breath catches.

He shakes his head, like he hates admitting it. “I loved you even when you made me feel invisible. I loved you even when I knew I shouldn’t.” His voice is quieter now, raw. “And I don’t know if I can go through that again.”

“I don’t want to put you through that again, I just want you.” Lando pulls his hand away from yours and tucks them into the pocket of his hoodie. He’s shielding himself from you, cautious.

He looks up at you briefly, a barely-there smile flashing across his face, before he whispers “I don’t know if I can trust that.”

—

It was raining.

It barely ever rained on this side of town, but for some reason, you found yourself hiding beneath the awning of a cafe as you waited for the rain to settle down enough to continue your walk. The rain hammers against the pavement when you hear someone clear their throat next to you.

The last person you expected to see when you turned your head was Lando.

Your breath hitches. He’s wearing a jacket too thin for this weather and his curls are damp, stuck to his forehead. He wears an unreadable expression when he looks at you. Not quite cold, but not warm either.

“You’re following me now?” He mutters, stuffing his fists into his pockets.

You hadn’t planned to see him again so soon— not after your last encounter left you with more questions than answers— but by some twist of fate, or bad luck, you were pulled back into his orbit.

You scoff, a look of disbelief briefly flashing across your face when you look at him. “I was here first.”

“Of course,” he rocks back on his heels.

You hated this– this awkward dance going on between you two. You circle each other, pull each other in just to push yourselves away. On any other day, standing next to him in the rain would’ve felt normal. Comfortable. But now it just felt like walking on particularly fragile eggshells.

You watch the rain in silence for a moment, debating whether or not to say something. Lando beats you to it.

“I’ve been thinking about it.”

Your pulse jumps. “And?”

“I don’t know what to do with it,” he admits with a shrug of his shoulders. “I meant what I said, I’m not sure I can trust that you won’t just disappear again.”

You swallow harshly, nodding. “I know.”

“But I want to believe you,” he exhales, raking a hand through his damp hair. “I want to go back to how things were, but I just— I’m not sure I can do that right now.”

“Okay,” your throat tightens. “Then tell me what to do.”

He blinks. “What?”

“Tell me what to do,” you repeat yourself, more firmly this time. “I want to make you believe that I’m not leaving again, so tell me how I can prove it to you.”

Lando hesitates for a second, unsure whether he should pull you back in or push you away. He takes his bottom lip between his teeth, biting the chapped skin off of them.

Then, finally, he says, “don’t give up on us so easy this time.”

Your chest tightens at the gentleness in his voice. “I won’t.”

Just then, the rain slows down and turns into a soft drizzle. Lando nods at you, like he wants to believe what you said, and turns around to walk back from the way he first came.

—

It happens late at night, when the whole world is so quiet and still, that it makes you feel like you’re the only people in the world and there’s nothing left between you but the unspoken words and old wounds that don’t sting as much anymore.

You were sitting in Lando’s car, eating whatever’s left of your fast food order, in some random parking lot with the windows fogged up from the heat inside and the streetlights casting a soft glow through the windshield. You had spent every evening of the past few weeks together— just talking, just existing in each others orbit— and it felt easy again.

Lando chucks a french fry into his mouth before slightly turning his body towards you. “You know, I think I’m done pretending.”

You halt your movements and glance towards him. “Pretending what?”

“That I don't love you.”

You now fully sit up, putting down the fry you had been holding in mid-air for the past ten seconds.

He huffs out a laugh, shaking his head. “I’ve been so wary, trying to keep you at a distance and not get too attached, just in case you hadn’t changed, in case you’d leave unexpectedly again. But you’re still here,” he looks to you with a soft sigh of relief. “And I don’t think I want to keep fighting it anymore.”

He watches as your lips draw into a small, sad smile. “Are you sure you mean that?”

“Yeah,” he murmurs, “I mean that.”

A silence settles between you two, neither of you looking at each other anymore and instead at your joined hands on the centre console of his car. His thumb draws circles on your knuckle and you drop your head back against the headrest, content in his touch.

“I’m scared I’ll fuck this up again,” you admit, the words hanging above you as you spoke them.

Every anxiety you have about this goes away the second you look at Lando and he looks back at you with nothing but love. “Then don’t.”

And when he leans in— slow, deliberate, like he’s trying to give you a chance to push him away— you don’t.

You kiss him like you should’ve all those times before, you pull him with the same force it once took to walk away, and Lando feels confident in his decision to trust that, for the first time in his experience of you— you won’t walk away.

—

You feel a tight squeeze to your hand as you step up to the front door of Lando’s childhood home. It’s warm against yours, steady, like a pillar you could lean your whole weight on. You hadn’t realised how tightly you were holding his hand until he looked down at you with a teasing smile.

“Nervous?” He gives you a minute, trying his best to ground you before either of you ring the doorbell.

“Pff,” you try your best to hide your anxiety behind a scoff and an eye roll. “No.”

Lando hums, unamused. “You’re crushing my hand, love.”

You drop your shoulders, finally admitting defeat. “It’s just— what if they don’t like me?”

He places both his hands on your cheeks, fully turning you to face him, the teasing smile now replaced with a look of something gentler. “They will,” he says, so firmly that it’s almost a promise.

You nod, exhaling a brief sigh. You’re not sure why this matters so much to you. Maybe because this is something real. A far cry from the unstable, shaky beginning you two had.

Lando leans down, placing a gentle kiss against the tip of your nose before ringing the doorbell. “Relax. They already know how much I love you.”

The words send a warmth through your spine— he says them so easily, like they’re so weightless and delicate, and won’t weigh in your stomach like an anchor thrown at sea.

Before you can say anything, the door swings open and out comes his mother.

“Finally!” Her voice is full of warmth and love as she pulls Lando into a hug before turning to face you. Her smile is welcoming and you barely have time to process before she’s pulling you in for a hug, too. “You’re even prettier than the pictures.”

You turn your gaze to Lando, still tightly squeezed in his mother’s embrace. “Pictures?”

Lando groans beside you. “Mum.”

His dad stands in the doorway, chuckling. “She means the ones he wouldn’t stop staring at when you were apart.”

You snort as you glance at Lando and he pointedly avoids your gaze, ears turning red. Before you can tease him about it, his mother ushers you both inside and launches into a conversation that somehow perfectly aligns with what you know. His family is warm, effortless, full of easy laughter and teasing remarks, and it’s not long before you feel yourself easing into it, letting go of the tension you hadn’t realised you were holding.

At some point, Lando’s hand finds your thigh under the dinner table, softly squeezing and caressing it over the fabric of your jeans. It’s casual, absentminded, but it does just the thing to ground you.

When you turn to him, he’s already smiling at you with a look that says ‘See? You belong here.’ You reciprocate the small smile and put your hand on top of his, gently caressing his knuckles, like how he does when he notices you zone out in conversation.

Over the past few months, Lando learnt and adapted to your behaviour— he knew exactly when you were anxious or too overwhelmed and needed a break, and he’d always make sure to give you any sort of touch to ground you. He’d brush past you in the kitchen of his apartment or gently place his palms against your hips if you were in a crowded place.

It always worked.

Something about his touch, his presence, made you immediately calm down. And he somehow always knew just when you needed it.

The evening passed in stolen glances, easy conversations and laughter at the dinner table. Lando was right— his family was warm, welcoming in a way that made something settle deep in your chest. Now, as you stand by the door and say goodbye with your coat in hand, you feel the weight of it all crashing onto you.

This was more than just late night conversations at Lando’s apartment. This was more than seeing him across the library and fighting the pit in your stomach to work up the courage and walk up to him. This was meeting his family, and you weren’t sure how to handle it.

His mother pulls you in for another hug, her arms so tight around you it’s like she’s known you forever. “It was lovely having you here,” she beams, pulling back just enough to get one last look at you. “Don’t become a stranger, okay?”

You swallow down the lump in your throat and hide it behind a smile. “I won’t.”

Lando’s father stands behind you two, softly patting his son on the back before turning to you. “Take care of him for us, yeah? He can be a handful.”

Lando drops his head back with a groan. “Oh my god, can we go now?”

Everyone laughs, but you just smile, because a part of you wishes you could freeze this moment and replay it forever— just the one moment that makes you think that you could actually do this forever.

As you step outside, still shouting goodbyes over your shoulder, Lando’s hand finds yours like it’s second nature and he leads you down the path to where he parked the car.

The drive back is quiet. Not awkward, but just silent enough for Lando to notice. You watch as the streetlights blur past, your fingers loosely entwined with Lando’s on the center console.

At a red light, he squeezes your hand to get your attention. “You okay?”

You lazily turn your head towards him, faking a smile. “I’m okay.”

He studies your face for a second longer after the light turns green. “They really liked you,” he finally says. “Not that I had any doubts.”

Your heart skips a beat and your lip quivers, because of course they did. They were perfect and everything about dinner with his family was perfect.

Maybe that’s why you were so uneasy— perfect things don’t last. You tighten your grip on his hand like you could hold onto him forever, but deep down you know that forever has never been something you’re good at.

Lando doesn’t notice the way your chest caved in with deeper breaths, or if he does, he doesn’t say anything. He just keeps humming quietly like he always does, fingers drumming against the steering wheel to a tune only he can hear.

It’s such a Lando thing to do, and for a second you feel an ache so sharp it steals the air from your lungs.

This is what you’ve always wanted. Him. But wanting something and being able to keep it are two very different things.

When he pulls into the parking lot outside your place, he shifts into park but makes no move to get out. His hand finds yours again and he lazily plays with your fingers.

“You’re quiet,” he observes softly.

You give him that same weak smile from before. “Just tired.”

Lando tilts his head slightly, studying you the way he always does when he knows you’re lying but doesn’t want to push. He nods after a while, his thumb brushing over the back of your hand as if to remind himself that you're still here.

“Do you want me to come up?” he asks.

You do, obviously you do, but the words don’t come out. Instead, you shake your head, squeezing his hand as you pull away and lean back to the rear seats and fetch your purse. “Not tonight.”

He furrows his brows. “Are you sure?”

You nod quickly, pushing the door open before he could ask again. “Yeah, I just have to, uhm—“ you exhale. “I’ll just see you tomorrow, okay?”

He doesn’t look convinced but doesn’t fight it. “Okay, love you.”

You hesitate for a second, like maybe you’ll gather the courage and climb back into the passenger seat to tell him the truth— that there’s something so rotten inside you, something so putrid and twisted, that you’re scared it’ll ruin him.

It’s so confusing to yourself as well— you know you love him, you feel it so intensely every time he’s near you, but you feel the urge to push him away even more. How are you meant to explain what’s happening inside when you don’t fully understand it yourself?

You could blame it on your parents, on the abandonment and emotional neglect. You could even blame it on yourself, for never fighting for what you love. But, ultimately, it’s just who you are.

You get a good thing and you ruin it.

So, instead of sitting back down and explaining the situation, you shut the door and walk away.

Lando texts you within that same hour.

Lando: Sweet dreams, love.

You stare at your screen, contemplating whether or not you should type out a response. Instead, you re-read it for longer than you should before putting it screen down on the nightstand and drifting off to sleep.

The following day, you don’t talk to Lando.

You don’t text, you don’t call, you don’t meet him for breakfast or lunch. You tell yourself you just need a little space, but the longer the silence, the heavier the weight of it as it presses against your ribs in a desperate but failed attempt to get out.

Your boyfriend calls. Then again. And a third time. You let all three of them ring out.

Lando: Are you okay? Did I do something? Talk to me.

You throw your phone across the bed and watch as it lands on your floor. You curl up into a ball and pray the earth swallows you whole, just so you’d stop feeling like this. You want to answer him, to tell him everything— how the world feels much brighter and the fear curls in your chest like it’ll always be there, and that being loved like this feels like you were holding onto something that’s way too good to be true.

At the end of the day, that’s what this is. And you’d rather leave before it comes crashing down on you than wait and live through the wreckage.

—

Three days pass before you see Lando again.

You knew he wouldn’t let go. Lando isn’t the kind of person who can sit with silence, not when it comes to you. When you hear the knock at your door, your stomach twists. You debate pretending not to be home, but Lando would just wait by your door— that’s just the kind of person he is.

When you open the door, he looks like the first time you ever saw him. His curls are a mess, there’s a tired look on his face, or maybe it’s frustration. He looks worried more than anything.

You try to be as casual as possible. “Hey.”

“Hey?” His eyebrows draw in close, disbelief flashing across his face. “That’s all you have to say?”

He pushes past you into your apartment, closing the door behind himself. “No. You don’t get to disappear for three and then act like nothing happened. What the hell is going on with you?”

At first, you say nothing. You just stare down at your feet. “I just needed some space.”

“Bullshit.” His voice comes out a lot less sharp than he intends for it to. “I know you. This isn’t space, it’s you running.”

You exhale a breath you didn’t know you were holding. “I’m not—”

Lando sighs, running a hand through his curls. “You are. You’re scared of something again.”

“So what if I am?” You suddenly snap, catching Lando by surprise.

“Then tell me, talk to me about what’s going on in that head of yours instead of shutting me out again.” He’s talking with a lot more desperation in his voice. “You think I don’t understand, so make me understand. Right now, it just feels like you’re looking for an excuse to leave again.”

You feel your eyes prick with tears and you know that if you tried to talk now, you’d break, so you say nothing. He pulls you into a hug and your arms don’t wrap around him like usual.

Silence hangs between you, heavy and suffocating. Then, quietly, he says, “See? I knew you hadn’t changed.”

You pull away from him to look at him. He sees it in your eyes, how your heart splits in half, and regret drowns out any other emotion he had on his face. But he doesn’t take it back. He’s waiting for you to prove him wrong.

“Listen—” you reach out to touch his hand, but he tucks it into his hoodie before you have the chance. “I just… I need some space, okay?”

A look of anger flashes across his face before he leans in closer, “have all the space you could ever want, I’m leaving.”

You flinch when the door to your apartment slams shut behind the only shot at love you’ve ever had.

[landopoet]

DAD LANDO LFG

i have a full fic in the works :) you can expect more dad!lando from me mwehehehe

[landopoet]

Hoping for more dad!Lando

and more dad!lando you shall get!

here’s a blurb :)

[landopoet]

daddy’s makeover

a short blurb in which lando gets a makeover all because he can’t say no to his daughter. (thanks to @clovermoters for the collage <3)

The house was a little too quiet for a Thursday afternoon.

You had woken up from a short nap— your sudden fatigue was courtesy of none other than the growing baby in your belly— and immediately noticed the eerie silence in the hallways.

Usually, you’d hear a TV show from the living room or laughter from the kitchen, or your daughter singing along to Taylor Swift from her bedroom.

Worried about the lack of any sort of noise, you stumbled out of bed and started checking the rooms.

The living room was empty, apart from the scattered dolls on the coffee table and the pink blanket messily thrown to the floor in a haste. The kitchen, which you had left clean before your nap, was littered with ingredients on the kitchen island and plates on the dining room table.

The only sound you could hear was the faint noise of your daughter shushing someone from her bedroom. Once you got close enough, you gently pressed an ear up to the shut door and heard your husband’s voice on the other side.

“Vi, is this necessary?” Lando said with noticeable discomfort to his voice.

Vienna rolled her eyes. That’s something she’s been doing recently— rolling her eyes at Lando when he disagreed with her. It made you laugh, but Lando felt obviously offended by it.

“Yes, dad, it is. You look pretty.”

That’s what caught your attention. Your hand softly engulfed the door handle and you gently pried it open to reveal your little family sat on Vienna’s bed.

“Oh, hi, mum!” She leaped off of it the second she saw you. You reciprocated her hug when her arms wrapped around your belly, “and hello little brother.”

“What are you guys doing?” You still hadn’t had time to properly notice what was happening to Lando. It was only when you locked eyes with him— a look in his green pupils so defeated that it made you feel bad— that you noticed the pink circles on his cheeks, the blue eyeshadow on his eyelids and two pigtails atop his head.

Vienna hopped her way back to the bed and picked up her lipsticks. “I’m giving daddy a makeover!”

Lando dropped his shoulders in defeat once Vienna’s fingers tightly held onto his chin and she forced him to look at her as she applied the bright pink lipstick to his lips.

A laugh rumbled through your chest at the sight— Lando was so tightly wrapped around Vienna’s finger that he just couldn’t say no to her little makeover.

It was sweet, honestly, how much he loved her. Obviously, he was excited to become a dad six years ago and he knew it’d come with its own challenges, but he never imagined one of them to be pink lipstick and mascara. Still, he let Vienna go crazy with her makeup as long as it made her happy.

“You look gorgeous, babe,” you try your best to hold in your laugh as you lean against the doorframe, still watching the scene in front of you.

Once Vienna’s finished, and Lando can finally get up, you notice the mischief in his eyes. “For the record,” he places a big, pink kiss on your cheek as his hands find your hips, “I only did this so she wouldn’t wake you up with whatever else she would’ve come up with.”

“Uh huh,” you laugh against his lips as he continues to leave pink kiss marks all over your face. “Or you can admit that you just needed a makeover from the best makeup artist in town.”

Vienna smiles at your compliment to her skills and looks over at Lando with an expectant look in her green little eyes. “Is that true, dad?”

Lando turns back toward her with a smile, “of course, Vi. I love my new look.”

If you thought his makeup was funny, you were not ready for his reaction to it. He didn’t take the makeup off for a good few hours and finally, when he went to the bathroom, you heard a loud yelp that had you down there in merely a few seconds.

“What? What’s wrong?” You burst in through the door. Once you saw him, you couldn’t help but laugh again. “Oh, god.”

“What did she do to me?” He whisper-yelled as he tried his best to get it off by scrubbing his face with water and face wash.

You opened up the cupboard and handed him cotton pads and micellar water. “She gave you a makeover, duh,” you rolled your eyes.

“You really need to stop doing that, she started rolling her eyes, too,” Lando complained as he took the items from your hands and wiped his face off, finally seeing his tan skin again underneath the layers of foundation.

“Who even got her all this makeup?” He furrowed his eyebrows as he scrubbed off the pink blush circles off of his cheeks. “She’s six years old, she doesn’t need all this.”

“You did. For Valentine’s day, when she asked you to go to a makeup store after your lunch date and you can’t say no to her, apparently.”

“Oh,” Lando drew his lips into a line as he nodded. “Right. I should’ve thought that through.”

[landopoet]

illness has struck me down, meaning that i’m taking a short break from writing until i feel better. sorry for the constant delays and thank you for your patience <3

[landopoet]

PART 2 OF SOMEWHERE IN BETWEEN WHEN?? 🙏🧎‍♀️

coming soon to a tumblr near you <3

[landopoet]

Omg dad!Lando is gonna be soooo goood 🥹🥹🥹 do you know what word count you’re aiming for?

i don’t actually have a set wc in mind whenever i write, i’m okay with whatever amount i write, but it’s at 2.9k already so at least 3.5k :D

[landopoet]

I absolutely love your writing 🥰 any chance we could get a sneak peak at the blurb themes you’re currently working on 😉

currently working on dad!lando, part 2 to somewhere in between and also a new fic :)

[landopoet]

life’s been kicking my butt lately so i haven’t been writing as much, and i’m sorry! i will absolutely get around to releasing an older work soon, maybe. but in the meantime…

i want to thank you all for 500 (!!!!!) followers!! i appreciate all of you so much, thank you for reading and supporting my works <3

much love, nova x

[landopoet]

can't wait to see what you've been working on!

and i can’t wait to share!! i got a couple requests that have really piqued my interest so i’ve been working on those and i’m trying to quickly finish at least one of them to upload tomorrow <3

[landopoet]

just a quick reminder that my requests are open for business… go crazy… hehe

[landopoet]

Nova come back, the kids are hungry and miss you 😢

i’m here, lovely <3 working on part 2 to somewhere in between & part 3 to clandestine !! here’s snippets of both, respectively.

[landopoet]

my master list 𖤣.𖥧.𖡼.⚘

all my works in one place!!

key... smut ☆ | fluff 𖤓 | angst ⚡︎

lando norris

snowfall - ☆

lando vs obs - 𖤓

black and fluro yellow - 𖤓 ⚡︎

slim pickin's - 𖤓

die with a smile - 𖤓

santa doesn't know you like i do - 𖤓

we love love day! - ☆ 𖤓

the parenting sacrifices - 𖤓

requests are open!