#anyways here ya go internet strangers <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[yalibat]

in my mind im having a party

[sunbloomdew]

oc inspired paintings :D

lyrics from "Message In A Bottle" by The Police

lyrics from "Tonight, Tonight" by The Smashing Pumpkins

see more about these pieces under cut :]

you don't have to, i was drinking melisa and as such was a bit sleepy while writing it. might not be very detailed or sensible lol

so, these are actually my ocs inspired paintings! first one is for haru and second one is for primrose. they are 'mirror characters' as i like to call them.

they were created alongside (more or less, the concept for them was anyway) and share themes and arcs in a way :)

now a little bit about the landscapes i picked and the songs.

"Message In A Bottle" is one of the songs from haru's playlist. There are a couple of reasons for why i chose it. First it's about loneliness which is a central aspect of haru's arc. they are a character who hates being alone and tries their hardest to make sure that doesn't happen. However in their pursuit of social renown and validation of a collective, they abandon the only people who loved them in the first place.

Loneliness is one of the things that prompted them to change in a way that would earn them approval of strangers and aquaintances. But their transformation ultimately didn't lead to them feeling better, instead it made them even more lonely - not able to connect with their newer friends and not able to open up to the old ones anymore.

The lyrics i chose have sort of a double meaning. It's how haru was feeling before their change begun. but it is also the way they are continue to feel, no matter how badly they deny it. the lyrics are also a contrast to their actual situation - they are surrounded by people who don't understand them - wether because they don't know them or don't know them anymore.

Second is the imagery. Haru was created for Our Life Beginnings and Always. While they are a spring themed character, i view them as the period of ending of spring and beginning of summer, so they embody both seasons to a degree. A castaway island in the song is something that i definitely associate with summer. And a summer, beach, california child is what haru tries to emulate, even if it's not truly what they are.

Third, it's a little inside joke with myself i have. i'm developing a pirate au with olba characters and ya know. bottle messages.... pirates......

Almost forgot but the last thing is that haru listens to a lot of 80s & 90s music, and this song came out in 1979 so. they definitely have heard it before. not their vibe but they thought it was okay.

anyhow, that song is fucking good, go give it a listen <3

and now for the second painting.

"Tonight, Tonight" is a song from Primrose's playlist. I think this song describes the uncertain nature of the future, but regardless of that, at this moment, tonight is tonight. There are things to come but not now. later. tomorrow. It ties into Primrose's arc.

At their core, Haru and Prim's stories are about change. Haru who rushes into things, changes themselves almost mechanically - with no regard for themselves or others, just to achieve their short-term goal. Primrose is going to be the opposite. A character who clings to the way things were, who never wants to plan for the future, afraid of what might change.

She is content to pretend that everything is just fine and things will go back to the way they were, losing herself in the comforts of her stories, books and the internet. Primrose is my Our Life Now and Forever character who is also spring themed except it's the winter-spring period. The change of the season is more visible and that makes her even less likely to accept it. The spring connection and imagery is more important here because spring is in a way a season opposite of fall. So part of the reason Primrose is afraid of change is her awareness of the fact that she doesn't really fit in Golden Grove.

Her journey will be about accepting that change in inevitable. And Haru's journey is about letting things be the way they are.

Her aversion to change is especially highlighted in her teenage years - everyone around her seems to be changing yet she is staying the same, not knowing if it's a bad thing or not, but not willing to find out either. I connect this song with her, because i feel like this is her expressing that she is not clueless about change but won't easily accept it either.

The lyrics are a bit of a foreshadowing to Prim's state as a young adult. People around her are figuring out their post high school plans, but she doesn't want to leave her hometown. "You can never ever leave without leaving a piece of youth." is the way she feels about leaving for university/college right away. It's also a bit more subtle in a way how growing up makes you leave some pieces of yourself behind, wether you want it or not.

I've been listening to other songs by The Smashing Pumpkins and what i like about them is that they aren't very direct with their meaning. It's a little bit how i want this character to be too. Maybe. Primrose isn't nearly as developed as Haru at the moment.

Some smaller things about the second painting. This song reads to me as Qiu/Primrose song specifically, step 2 one probably. I chose a forest with those type of trees because Rosie is Canadian and they have boreal forests there. Also i liked this imagery for her.

this song is good too, although i like "1979" from the same album more. still, give it a listen :3

i wanted to post some oc stuff, cause i get distracted by my other characters easily and start working on them, but i still wanna yell into the void about Haru and Rosie :]

toodles~

[disdaidal]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (except me because obvs I have done it). Spread the self-love ❤

D'aww thank you hun! I'm not sure I can answer with five because all my favorite fics written by me don't even exist on the internet anymore. 🙊 But I can always try~

To the Moon and Back is something I'm currently working on and very excited about. It's a multichapter Final Fantasy 7 fic, Cloud/Zack, omegaverse, rated E etc.

Since it's my very first FF7 fic as well as my first published omegaverse fic ever, I was initially quite nervous to even start writing it let alone publish it. It has three published chapters on ao3, all of which have gotten positive feedback so far (and subs, I see ya <3), which obviously inspires me a lot. I'm already having lots of ideas for future chapters and also few good ideas how I'm going to end it, something which doesn't always happen to me (I just go with the flow, most of time). The story also has some non-traditional omegaverse elements because well, omegas and alphas don't always have to be so stereotypical, I think, and... truthfully... I just had a mighty craving for some sloppy bottom/omega!Zack the fandom is feeding me absolute crumbs in that sense and seems to think cloud's dick is just a pretty accessory XD I'm feeling like I can actually make my own rules here and it feels pretty damn good right now.

A Touch of Cinnamon, Gallahir/Witcher. Roommates, Friends to Lovers, multichapter, rated E. I answered in another tag game already why this story was such a passion project for me last autumn, but yeah. It was inspired by OneofWeb's Buttercup Tattoo series (some really nice works there <3), and I genuinely enjoyed writing and planning it. Like I also mentioned before, it's still a work in progress but never say never. :D

There Must Be An Angel (Playing With My Heart), Harringrove/Stranger Things, Homelessness/Guardian Angels, multichapter, rated E.

How this story originally got its inspiration, well... once upon a time I watched a Japanese gay porn movie with a plot (gasp) and uhh, I might've expanded on that a little bit. *hides* Sadly the story only has one chapter that's been lying in wait for almost two years now, but... I am still thinking about it sometimes. I really liked the original idea (:P) and I still like the following story idea that I came up with, so hmm. Maybe if I get inspired to write something for this ship again, I could be tempted to continue this.

As for other two... I used to write plenty of rps bandfic back in the day and that one AU one-shot (or was it two-shot? anyway) I wrote somewhere around late 2008 I think, got a little bit smutty, a little bit 'problematic' as well, and man... what can I say, I still like that one. A lot, actually. The ship I wrote that fic for wasn't super popular in that band either but didn't matter to me.

And the fifth? One of my future works perhaps? :D

As for tagging... I already tagged a few people in previous tag games and I don't know how many of you actually care about doing these things, so... feel free to take this from me if you see this and want to do this. <3

[cinnaminsvga]

omg so i saw your account pop up on that bit at the side with accounts to follow and stuff and immediately was thrown back

i don't know how long ago it was actually but based on the fact I've recently revived my own writing account after like 3 years away and forgetting tumblr even exists, but it's been at least that long since I last saw your account but immediate like nostalgia

this sounds terrible but i genuinely can't remember what exactly I read of yours (other than probably most of it back in the day) but I just remember you were one of my fave writers, i don't really read bts anymore because i'm up seventeen's ass these days but ima have to go through your masterlist and reread stuff for the memories now

im pretty sure that there was one specific fic series you wrote that you made group chats for on kakao maybe, i was there for it i just have terrible memory. now watch it turn out it wasn't even you that did that 🥴

i actually meant to send an ask last night when I saw your account and followed you (i think i used to follow you from my personal but idk) but it was late so I thought "hey let's wait until tomorrow when you can string together more cohesive sentences, yeah?" and then this shit show happened. but at least im not actually screaming at you in this ask like i probably would've last night

anyway, just wanted to just idek just sort of reminisce a lil and tell you that it made me really happy to see your account after these years even if you're not always active, it's nice to see that you still pop back now and then 💖

(I apologise for the mess of this. i'd say im usually more eloquent but that's a fucking lie, im a complete mess all the damn time <3)

WOAGH this was an unexpected letter in my inbox i'll tell you what (a pleasant surprise!) but hello hello welcome back and thanks for taking the time to send a message after all these years :D the tumblr algorithm, in all its mystery and dysfunctionality, sometimes makes little fun things happen like this lol

judging by your description, that fic series you're talking about is very likely "the lonely hearts club", which i suppose is an smau rather than a fic but yenno... it was something alright... if you were there during the peak of it, when i had kakao group chats for it... then it must have been 6 years since youve been around these parts (i posted that in 2018!! aint that a strange thing!!)

also, i appreciate all and every screaming ask sent my way HAHA this was actually very fun to read because like you said, i'm not very active on this blog, but getting messages once in a while is still a sweet treat!! nice to know that strangers on the internet just feel... compelled to talk to me, yenno?? especially you, who had somehow stumbled onto my patch of land by some algorithmic miracle :D it's nice reminiscing with ya!! if you really were here back in 2018, then you've known me a long time (even if you forgot most of it HAHA but i dont blame ya... my memory is pretty foggy even on a good day) so thanks for making a short stop my way <3

[hawkeyedflame]

"anyway, go ahead and post your screenshots, like i give a fuck. i never said anything in that server that i don't stand by still, and i certainly never harassed anyone. while you're doing that, maybe go outside and touch some grass. like, seriously. live your life outside in the real world like a normal person and you might realize that nobody gives a flying fuck about your internet temper tantrums."

This is just Peak ironic and hypocrisy of you and your friends given what they were doing in there but I'm sorry that you just want to sweep everything underneath the rug and act like you're forgiven or have Redemption now when you haven't done anything to become a better person lol lmfao even.

It's super duper funny to watching you try to take the high road here 😂 but just know people know the real you twerp

2) Rules for the not we must be very strong motto with you too 😂 But again it's so crazy how you just lied and then immediately resended that lie and tried to wiggle your way out, you want to talk about being racist or sexist or homophobic but wait till the screenshots come out and I'll tag everything appropriately there for you and see how your friend still feel about you but deep down you haven't changed and wont change just like your creepy pals that were in there with you haven't stopped or changed as well but I'm going to guess that you just conveniently avoided all that somehow huh 3) You were so upset over hominis and his wife both racist sexist garbage people 🤡 enjoy your side show clowns ya freakshow 😂 Karma will see to you, don't worry ugly. 4) Awe you're upset of cisnowflake too another horrible sexist racist loser? For all your projecting and positioning you try to do on your page you're still just the same person you have been 2 years ago and even further back because no matter where you go or what you do you are still you Paige and your true colors will bleed back through and you can't change the hate in your heart anymore than you can change how retarded, ironic and hypocritical you are 😂 Cuz again I don't see you renouncing your friends Behavior or what they did or your part in it you're just mad because I'm here calling you out about it while you're trying to save face. I mean again if you truly moved on and are turning this new page relief you could have just apologized or said you know what that situation was horrible but no you double down back to like you always do and will again. Garbage person, simple ass 🤷‍♂️ 5)Again it's just funny you go from you weren't in any kind of Discord doing harassment or talking shit about people you dont even know and then you admit that you were in there and you stand by everything that you said but then say you've changed and its others problems what you did and caused. Yup that's the way to have integrity and maturity and to get to the next level of being a better person for sure just sleeping everything underneath the rug and flipping everybody off in the process. I hope your life is as "pleasant" as you have been.

I go to bed and then go to work and come back to this word vomit... You might actually be more deranged than the chick from the FMA fandom who was tweaking out about me supposedly being a transphobe. I'm legitimately impressed by your dedication. Honest.

So anyway, this is really funny, I guess since you're on anon like a spineless worm, you're giving me the liberty of having the last word, because I certainly won't be answering any more asks from your crazy ass after this lol

I am friends with very few people in that server. The people who are/were in there at the time that I was also using the server were acquaintances at most, with the vast majority being strangers I'd never met. I never once participated in harassing or being hateful towards anyone while I was using that server. As I said, post your screenshots if it will make you feel big and cool. I do not give a fuck. It's not like I'm going to waste my time looking at whatever "evidence" you think you have on me.

I didn't lie. I said I don't use servers, which is true. I did not say that I've never used servers. 2+ years of not participating in any servers constitutes saying that I do not use servers. You're grasping at straws, it's pretty sad.

When was I ever upset about Hom and his wife? They can take care of themselves. This doesn't even make any sense.

This is actually just really funny. You're here on anon trying to tell me you know me well enough to know whether I've changed as a person. I have, believe me. Just not in my political opinions. I don't need to renounce anything or apologize for anything, because I am not any of the things you are accusing me of being, nor are any of the people you have brought up by name in this weird little mental breakdown you're having in my inbox.

Again, didn't lie. Didn't talk shit about anyone I don't know except for a couple of creepy-ass tumblr losers that were outright stalking a couple of my acquaintances. Perhaps you're assmad because you're one of those stalkers? Much to think about. My life is extraordinarily pleasant, yes, and getting better every single day. Thank you for the well wishes. Happy new year :)

[sirenofthegreenbanks]

n, o, t, z for the fandom ask game 😁

n: Name three things you wish you saw more of in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).

this question had me think for a bit, im mostly content with whats going on in the fandoms i participate in, buuuuuuuuuuut then i recalled:

1) i once watched a video essay on ning yi that really impressed me. (i just searched the internet up and down to link it but i cant!!! find it!!!! whatt iisss thissss) anyway, i want more of that!!! for rise of pheonixes fandom, but also for WOH and for TYK!!! i neeeeeeeeEEEed it

2) generally more academic-approached textanalysis for tian ya ke. im dYING to read something like that!

3) for the fics i would like to request MESSINESS in regards to zhou zishu and wen kexing respectfully, thank u (BONUS IF THEY HAVE AFFAIRS ON THE SIDE OR SLEEP AROUND)

o: Choose a song at random. Which ship or character does it remind you of?

i threw a dart and it landed on this which reminds me of wen kexing in that moment in the novel when hes gearing up to slaughter mo huaiyang and hes all exhausted and bleeding but he needs to avenge his a-xiang‘s silly little husband. (i lied i dont have darts. i clicked next in my epic orchestral music playlist and this is what showed up.)

(while im typing this this started playing and now im thinking about elizabeth swan ,, ,,,, im so gay)

t: Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending? 

the headcanon i told u last night, about zzs and ljx! i dare u to reread qiye!!! come fight meeeeeeee!!!!!

z: Just ramble about something fan-related, go go go! (Prompts optional but encouraged.)

UM. ive always been very passionate about fictional characters and fictional worlds. when we were kids i would share comics with my brother and we would read them together, when i grew out of my childhood books my sister inherited them and grew to love them just as much as i do. my mom is not a tokio hotel fan per se, and she doesnt watch the same shows or read the same books as me, but we tell each other what we are currently invested in and she loves seeing what i create. fandom can looks like anything, it can be small and offline and familiar and private like what i just described, or it can be subscribing to magazines and read the fan theories and fan letters that are published in it. it can be organizing big events like conventions and forge a bridge between fans and the source material. it can be a community on social media like here on tumblr. but its in its essence all the same, people—sometimes literal strangers— forming connections to eachother simply because they are all in some way moved by the same thing, generating new thought and creativity everyday and cultivating a culture of communication and cultural exchange, entirely seperate from our capitalist society, and i think thats really beautiful

fandom ask game

[leoiraa]

Hey! How’s your life going? Btw, for no reason at all, what time was the hotel in your fic built in? It’s says in Stalin’s time but that’s like 20s-50s so I just want to know for absolutely no comprehendible reason which century it was/ you like best.

Anyway, love ya as much as an internet stranger is allowed, hope your doing great!

(Here’s a doodle I did that’s going to threaten you to have a good time :] )

Hey it’s so good to hear from you, I hope you’re well!! Thank you for your drawing it did make me giggle whilst iIwas at work heheheh :p

To answer your question I wanna make it clear that the hotel is 1000% made up 😭 The original time I wrote the fic (when i was 13) it was set in Moscow which doesn’t make much sense for how long they’re trapped for, so I dumped them in the middle of nowhere and came up with a backstory of a place that Stalin liked to go lol

I’m going completely off of memory of when I studied Russian history for a year, but I took inspo of it from Stalin’s investment in the Moscow metro (the stations described to be almost like palaces 😳) and some architectural developments like the Metropolitan hotel (not built during Stalin’s reign but inspired by the art noveau style), the plans that were scrapped of the Palace of the Soviets, and especially the main building of the Moscow State University. The biggest inspo was the Hotel Ukraina - it’s a 5 star hotel and has like over 500 rooms and I pretty much just took that and plonked it somewhere random in Russia!

I’m not sure if I have a specific century of Russian history (I’m assuming you were asking about Russia specifically!) that I like the best. I am a history student (i do classics and archaeology at uni :3) and the Russian period I did was from 1860-1960 but that was a looonng time ago. I’ve bought so many Russian history books that I’ve been meaning to get through but I’m defo wanting to look into both Ivan the Great and Catherine the Great! I have so many hetalia history fics running around in my head, I just wish I had the time and the discipline to actually do some of it.

Anyway, sorry for talking your ear off but thank you for your ask!! Hope you’re doing okay, it’s always nice hearing from you :)

[vad-hander]

JAEBEOM, THE GUY FROM THE BAR

Pairing: Jaebeom x reader

Genre: Series | Eventual Smut | Angst | Fluff

Warnings: break up, cheating, strangers to lovers, mentions of drinking

Words: 3.8k

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Your head felt dizzy and you wouldn’t lie if you’d say that everything caved in and pulled out from under you.

The first sip you took was when your foot exited the store, unscrewing the lid of the wine you bought, immediately. It burned your throat, but the whole in your chest burned ten times stronger and you chose to deal with your inner pain first. Your feet walked you through the streets of Seoul, trying to focus your brain on something other than the void inside of you but failed miserably. The first bottle didn’t do its job yet and when you pressed it against your lips for another sip you noticed how it was already empty. The nearest bin became it’s grave and the nearest store became your saviour, allowing you to buy another drink. This time your eyes fell onto the beer, and you bought three bottles, opening them in the park nearby, you sat down on the grass, fishing out the cake you had baked a day before from the bag on your shoulder. Not bothering with the way you’d it eat you just bit into it, getting cake all over your face. You chuckled to yourself, wiping sweet goodness from your skin.

You turned on music in your headphones, playing every upbeat song there was, nodding your head and moving your foot to the beat, right until you felt warm trails of tears on your cheeks. You laid your head on the grass, hiding your face in your palms, not holding back anymore from crying.

You weren’t able to believe it, you couldn’t believe he did this to you. You never thought he’d cheat, you never thought you’d find out about it in such a bad way. You never expected this from Jeno, but then again, who ever expects their partner to cheat?

Your mind went again over everything you’ve been through in the past 8 months, your mind went through your friendship of 3 years, 3 years of you being head over heels for Jeno until one day you became more.

Suddenly you remembered how Jaebeom told you to break up with him making you hate everything about the situation even more. If you listened, you would’ve not went through what you just went through, but why would you listen to a stranger anyway? You hated the fact he was right, but one single memory of him made you want to see him.

You fished out your phone to search on the internet open hours of the bar. The website said 5 PM, making you shift your eyes up to the clock of your phone. It was already three, and since your plans for the day and maybe even life were ruined, you had no better things to do than just come there and wait for him. Wait for Jaebeom for no reason. Just because he was the only person that didn’t know Jeno, just because he was the only person you wanted to see.

The route in your phone promised you that you’d be there right before opening if you’ll walk, so without hesitation you sat up, collecting yourself and walking in the direction of the bar.

You tried to do everything for emptiness in your hands to bother you more, than the new feeling of having your heart ripped from your chest, and halfway to the bar you went to one more alcohol store, getting this time a proper drink - rum. You didn’t know where this rum addiction suddenly came from, but now you guessed it should be your signature drink when it came to meeting Jaebeom.

The familiar by now burn of the drink gave your brain one more reason to think about Jaebeom. You have almost forgot that you spilled your drink over him, almost forgot the way he said your name. Memories of him almost made a small shard of your heart go back in place, almost, because the image of Jeno with HER, made all of your insides clench in pain.

Jeno. Jeno. Jeno. Jeno. Your brain went in overdrive, repeating his name like a mantra. Your fingers ached to dial his number but your brain knew you had nothing to tell him. Your love have died just like that, it didn’t go somewhere overnight, you didn’t wake up and understand that you didn’t love him anymore. He killed it with his actions, Jeno killed everything there was with his actions, and now you were killing memories of him in your head, finding the neck of the bottle with your lips.

From the side you must’ve looked like a psychopath, crying, laughing, talking to your own self, walking in a quicker and slower pace. Doing everything that came to your mind. Now you were free in every meaning possible, why’d you bother about anything?

You got there quicker than your phone have promised, seeing the door of the bar being closed. Not finding a better option than just sitting on the bench not far from the entrance, you placed the bottle next to you, only realising how tired you got from walking when your butt rested against wooden material of your seat. You looked around, noticing how the area of the bar was actually pretty quiet. Your eyes ran over the streets that were surrounding the building, wondering in your mind if one of those roads led to Jaebeom’s house.

Alcohol from the rum hit you like a rock, crawling from behind your brain with tiredness. You closed your eyes for a slight second, only to feel someone touch your shoulder the next moment.

“Are you alive?” a man asked you carefully. Your eyes blew open in fear, noticing how it was much darker outside. Your eyes focused on the man in front of you.

“Jaebeom.” you said quietly, sighing.

“Celebrating your boyfriends birthday to the max?” he joked, grabbing the bottle from next to you. You tried to smile back, biting your upper lip and lifting your eyes up to the sky to prevent from crying.

“No, I’m alone here.” your voice trembled and it was the last bit before you broke down. Hot tears streamed down your face, making you feel embarrassed. You barely could see Jaebeom’s face but he went quiet and you guessed he didn’t want to deal with that, expected.

“It’s okay, it’s okay, calm down.” his hands touched your cheeks and your insides turned upside down. “We’ll work everything out, you can tell me.” His thumbs drew soothing little circles under your eyes making you want to put it all in you to stop crying. You blinked multiple times finally being able to see his face properly for the first time this evening, seeing him squatting in front of you. He probably noticed you focus your vision on him, gifting you a kind smile. “Hi.”

“Hi.” you cleared your throat in a couple of seconds, finally replying. You thought he’ll let go of your face by now, but he kept his fingers glued to your cheeks, keeping his eyes glued to yours. You felt your breathing get heavier, but you attributed it to your recent crying.

“How come you’re so beautiful even when you’re crying?” he chuckled more to himself, beating air from your lungs completely.

Your hands slowly found Jaebeom’s on your cheeks, covering his hands with yours. You wanted to make him let go of you, but when you got the taste of what his hands felt like with your own, you changed your mind immediately.

People passed by, drunk and sober, some were just going in and some were already leaving. You didn’t know how long your nap took, you didn’t know how come you got so lucky to be woken up by Jaebeom and not some weird creep.

You stared at each other, both of you being scared to break the moment.

“Ya, Jaebeom, where did you get lost?” the voice of a guy made you jump in Jaebeom’s hands, turning your head in unison with Jaebeom to face the guy.

“Get lost, I’ll come later.” one of his hands left you, showing the guy to leave.

You let go of Jaebeom’s hand when he turned back to you, and he let go of your cheek too, sitting on the bench right next to you.

“Why did you sleep on the bench?” he asked not looking at you.

“Buy me a drink.”

“What?”

“You wanted to buy me a drink twice, now I agree.” you looked at him.

“I won’t.” he turned to face you.

“Why is that?”

“You’re drunk.”

“I’m not.”

“Is that all you had? Half of the rum?”

“No…” You said shamefully.

“What else?”

“Wine, beer and then this.” you listed quickly expecting any reaction from him, but he just watched you.

“Let’s go.” he quickly stood up after some time of silence.

“Where to?”

“Cafe next block. You need food and coffee, and when you’ll tell me everything I’ll see if you’re allowed to drink any more. Come on.” he signalled for you to go with his head and you stood up too, grabbing the bottle to take with you. “Give me that.”

“Why?”

“I’ll carry it for you. Don’t worry, I won’t throw it away, I see that you have a special relationship with rum. I won’t fight it.” he shot you a smile, pulling the bottle from your hands.

***

“Eat up.” Jaebeom moved the plate closer to you when the waitress that eyed him wildly finally left your sight.

“Thank you.” you sighed, picking the fork and a knife, cutting up the pancakes in the plate. Jaebeom took the coffee pot, pouring hot beverage into your cup and placing the pot back on the table. “Hey, have coffee too.” you furrowed your eyebrows.

“You eat, you need to sober up.”

“I never offered the food, don’t even dream of that.” you played with your eyebrows and Jaebeom chuckled at you, smiling at you sweetly for a few more seconds after you lowered your eyes to the plate.

You cut through the pancakes, sticking a few pieces on the fork. Lifting your eyes up you noticed that he poured coffee for himself too. You waited patiently for him to lift his eyes up at you.

“Open your mouth.” you commanded the next second he looked at you. A smirk lit up his face and a sudden regret rushed over your body. Maybe that was a bit overboard, maybe that’s the rum inside of you speaking. Whatever it was, it was way too late now to back off. Jaebeom nibbled on his lower lip with a smile, opening his mouth slightly and extending his neck towards you. Your hand moved up and froze in the air when your eyes focused on his mouth. Redness flashed over your face at the thoughts that ran in your head. How soft would his mouth feel on yours?

His hand quickly grabbed yours, moving it towards his face, forcing the fork into his mouth and biting the pancakes off it. He let go of your hand, letting it fall back onto the table.

“So tell me, what happened?” he asked you after he finished chewing. His elbows laid on the table, making you feel as if you were under interrogation.

“Don’t be a party pooper, I just began feeling better.” you whined, making Jaebeom laugh again. What’s up with him laughing at everything you say? We’re you that funny…? You never noticed before.

“I didn’t know you considered this a party.” he sighed. “I’m sorry.”

You nodded quickly, forcing your attention into the plate, knowing if you’d keep your eyes on him a second longer you’d cry.

You stared into the plate through the whole time you ate, finishing the coffee in your cup, feeling how he stared at you quietly while you were consuming everything that was on the table.

“Jeno, my boyfriend, the guy you told me to dump, I guess he dumped me.” you leaned more into the seat, seeing Jaebeom’s face for the first time in a while. He kept quiet, allowing you to continue but you didn’t do it.

“On his birthday?”

“Yeah.”

“Right after you came with miyeok guk?”

“Yeah… well, I think technically before that.” you chuckled hysterically. “I came to his place, punched in the code and got to his bedroom only to find a topless girl on top of him. They were…” you coughed awkwardly.

“Fucking?” he asked carelessly.

“Yeah… that. So… I guess he only called me last night to find out if I’ll come early when she was already there, to see if he should make her leave or what. I shouldn’t have lied, if I didn’t I would’ve lived my happy clueless life. Want to know the funny part?”

“There is one?” Jaebeom seemed surprised.

“You were right about the girl, you probably did see her somewhere because she was the one with him. I doubt she is the friends sister now.” you sighed and moved in your seat worriedly. You felt better but at the same you felt wrong sharing this with him. “The ridiculous part is that you really did read through my entire life in a second. That’s really annoying.” you looked him in the eyes, chuckling. “And concerning as well, should I be listening to you from now on in everything I do?” you tried to joke with him once again and he gifted you another smile.

“I won’t protest, but I won’t force you either.” he looked you deep in the eyes. He did that way too often as if he tried to speak to you through staring.

“Would you like anything else?” waitress broke off the silence, ruining one of your moments.

“No, thanks.” Jaebeom gave the girl the same smile he always gave you, and a weird pinch of jealousy hit your chest. “Give us the bill, please.” his voice was soft and the girl smiled even brighter than before.

“Just a moment.” she bowed and left.

“So you’re friendly like that to everyone.” you noted to yourself but did it aloud for some reason.

“I’m friendly to everyone but for you I’m all that and even more.” he leaned in and extended his hand to you, laying it with his palm up for you to lay yours on top.

“Why?” he stretched his fingers signalling to you that he’s waiting.

“There should be a reason?”

“There’s a reason for everything.” you replied, fighting an inner battle if its appropriate now to touch his hand.

“Okay, then my reason is that I’m naturally attracted to you. Didn’t I tell you already multiple times that I liked you?” he sounded so casual as if he spoke about weather. Your hands felt cold due to fear you were experiencing. Was he meaning he liked you as a person? As a company? Or did he mean something else…? Something more? The idea of asking him to clarify these questions gave you a whiplash. His whole presence gave you constant whiplash with everything he said, did and even with the way he looked at you. You knew for sure you weren’t about to forget Jeno in a second and you were afraid to tell that to Jaebeom in case he didn’t mean it in that way at all. Jeno broke your heart and you knew that you needed more time to over-live it than 8 hours. At the same time you were afraid Jaebeom would laugh at your silly assumption of him wanting you by his side in a different way.

Giving him your hand to hold wouldn’t hurt anything though, right? You thought to yourself it wouldn’t and laid your palm on top of his.

“I thought you said I’m okay and we could be friends, now you doubted to lay your hand on top of mine for 10 minutes, I’m offended.” His fingers wrapped around your hand moving it closer to his side of the table. His other hand laid on top of yours and you shivered unconsciously hoping he didn’t notice. “ you’re funny, cute and smart, that’s his loss, you shouldn’t be crying about someone who didn’t only disrespect you, he just showed what type of person he is. He’s a trash bag if he cheated, don’t waste your nerves on that. It’s better you found out more or less quickly. If you need someone to rely on I can be by your side. You can call me anytime.” Jaebeom lifted your hands off the table, finding your eyes with his, biting his lower lip. Lifting your hands higher, he lowered his head, planting a small kiss on the back of your hand. You couldn’t help but smile shyly at his gesture. “Give me your phone, by the way.”

“Oh?” you asked surprised but didn’t want to protest or question him any further, moving your hand from his and getting your phone out on the table. You unblocked it getting startled by the photo on the home screen. The photo of you being on Jeno’s back, kissing his cheek sweetly, while he bended and smiled into the camera happily. You wanted to change it quickly for Jaebeom to not see but your hands just froze. The void in your chest suddenly enlarged to the previous size.

Jaebeom grabbed the phone from your hands before you could even realise it and began doing something you couldn’t see. It took him longer than you expected and you bit your tongue to not ask questions.

You watched him focusing his vision onto the screen of your phone, probably typing his phone number into your contacts while you were just appreciating his handsome features.

“Would you like to pay by card or cash?” the waitress appeared scaring you once again.

“Card.” you said in unison. Jaebeom gave you a look, laying your phone by his side.

“I ate, I’ll pay.” you expanded your hand to grab the phone and pay with it but he caught your hand with his, making you blush because you could definitely feel the waitresses eyes on your hands.

“No.” he nodded strictly and the piercing gaze that he gave you killed your will to fight with him over that.

“Thanks for food… and for words you said…” you told him when the both of you exited the cafe. “You really are a good friend I guess.” you lifted your eyes to see his face.

“You want to go home?” he sounded disappointed. “Sounds like you’re saying goodbye.”

“No, I’m just saying thank you.” you smiled. “Or were you hoping to not spend any more money on me? Didn’t you promise me a drink?” you whined jokingly.

“I thought you’re trying to run away from me.”

“No.” You shook your head.

“Good, i wouldn’t let you anyway.” he stepped closer invading your private space. “I’ll buy you as many drinks as you’d want me to…” he raised his arm and you stopped breathing to see what he’ll do next and he moved his palm closer to your cheek, making it burn with the electricity that was forming in the space between you two, but dropped his hand back down the next second. “Just stay by my side… for tonight, at least.” his hand found your wrist, pulling you to go after him towards the entrance of the bar. 15 minutes later the both of you were sitting at the bar, waiting for the bartender to notice you called him.

“Rum and coke?” Jaebeom asked with a laugh.

“I’ll have what you’ll have.”

“Okay.” he nodded seriously, lifting his arm again. “Two shots of vodka.” he gestured number two with his fingers.

“Just a second.” your eyes ran from Jaebeom to bartender quickly, trying to see if he was about to tell you it was a joke, but he didn’t. Even when the shot glasses hit the bar he watched bartenders moves quietly, only looking up at you when the order was done.

“I didn’t know that’s what you meant when you said you want to buy me a drink.” you laughed awkwardly.

“That’s just because you said you want what I want.” he pushed the glass towards you more.

Your eyes ran between Jaebeom and vodka.

“Okay, on the count of 3.” you grabbed the glass.

“No, no, both of these are for you.”

“What?”

“Drink.” he gestured.

“Jaebeom.” you sighed disapprovingly.

“You’ll feel better when you’ll stop thinking about everything.”

“I’ll pass out, if it seemed to you that I’m a great drinker, you’re wrong. I’m not drinking often and I’m not really taking it well.”

“You can chill out, I won’t let anything happen to you even if you’ll pass out.” his hand reached your cheek, caressing it a few times.

“Give me a single reason why I should trust my life to a stranger?” you asked curiously.

“To see that I’m not just a stranger to you anymore.” his hand stopped moving and his eyes glued to you in anticipation. Your hand slowly found the glass without looking away from Jaebeom, raising it to your lips, you exhaled, quickly downing the shot. Now that you were completely sober the drink burned like hell and there was nothing to wash down vodka, so you just grabbed the other glass too, downing it in a span of a second. You felt Jaebeom’s hand move from your cheek to your neck, while you were wrinkling your face in disgust, suddenly pulling you by it from where you sat into his embrace. You fell, resting your body against his as if you were a small child, feeling his hand let go of your neck and rest against your back. Your face hid in the crook of his neck and you couldn’t not point out to yourself how bloody good he smelled. Everything about him was always too good to be true. He seemed perfect to the extent it felt concerning but you guessed it was a bit too late to back off now.

When you finally were able to open your eyes again you still felt his hands on your waist, moving yours to rest against his shoulders to push back a little. He didn’t let go of you, leaving his fingers to burn the skin of your sides even through the clothes.

“I didn’t think you’d actually drink both.” he chuckled “you fine?” you nodded yes and he allowed you to sit back.

“I want more.” you turned to face him when you sat.

“More of what?”

“Whatever you’ll buy me.” you smiled at him feeling a bit drunk. Jaebeom nodded at you, biting on his lower lip.

One more round of pure alcohol, and that’s the last thing you remember of the evening.

[selene-moonie]

Brunch - the mindset shift

We all love brunch. Or maybe that's just me with the bottomless mimosas and breakfast food. Point is, brunch is great, and when you go, the goal is to have a good time.

Now, once upon a December, ya girl was a people pleaser. Shit was hard for her because she kept trying to make everyone else happy, ignored her boundaries and didn’t take care of herself.

Obviously, that wasn’t the vibe. How am I supposed to be living my dream life if I’m a slave to everyone’s whims? I couldn't. I wasn't.

Anyway, I was scrolling through tiktok early 2022 when I found a girl talking about how being a bimbo allowed her to not stress as much, and being a brunch friend was cool.

I took that and expanded it a bit. How could I apply this kind of thinking to my whole life?

How would I respond if I were to look at every situation as a brunch situation?

Now, before we even get into that, we need to know what it really looks like.

What exactly is Brunch?

If we remember, when you go to brunch, all you're there for is a good time. If your friend wants to tell you about how her life is a mess, you listen, but you're mostly having fun. Let her vent out her frustrations, and then when brunch is over, you go home and she has to resolve her issues herself.

If we take that into other situations in our lives, it could look like you not allowing the fact that your romantic interest hasn't reached out to you as yet trigger you.

Or, instead of feeling upset that there's a crackhead on your side of the street, you cross the street and keep walking.

Brunching, at it's core is about choosing when to expend your energy on events and situations in your life. By knowing when to put on your helper hat, you reserve your energy and time for the things that are actually important to you.

Perks of brunching often:

You have more time for yourself You stop taking things personally

You can spot bs faster, which allows you to choose whether to engage much earlier

You feel empowered because your energy isn't being bled on useless shit

You allow others to rise to meet you

You start feeling more comfortable with yourself

And a whole lot more

My best friend used to live with his verbally abusive mom, and prior to brunching, he'd panic a lot about everything she'd tell him.

After practicing brunching for a while, he said, "Bestie, I'm not stressed out about her anymore, even though she's still doing the same shit."

So, how do you brunch?

First things first, if you end up in a situation where you don't know if brunch applies, here's what to do:

1. Assess the situation.

- Is this your responsibility, or your business? If yes, deal with it appropriately, if no, move onto the next step.

2. Determine whether reacting would really help you or slow you down.

- Do this even if it feels uncomfortable, especially if you're used to reacting all the time.

3. Look the other way and move on.

- Quite literally this emoji 👀, then you move along with whatever you need/want to be doing at that point in time.

Example time

1. You're online and someone tweets something highly controversial. Would it be helpful to you to engage or not? You decide not to, so you scroll past it and avoid wasting 20 minutes of your day, as well as not getting angry about things you disagree with over a stranger on the internet.

2. So your manifestation hasn't shown up yet. It's nearing the time that you need it. You could panic, or you could remind yourself that you're a powerful manifestor and focus on living your life in the 3d as best as you can. Even though you haven't seen your manifestation as yet, you aren't letting something that isn't your responsibility (figuring out the how) trigger you.

Side Effects

Some of these were listed in the perks section of this post, but here are some others.

It may be uncomfortable....

especially if you're accustomed to people pleasing, or everything triggers you. As you do it more often, you'll notice that you feel more empowered, which can be scary, because you'll start connecting to your natural self.

You may immediately feel better...

Because you chose yourself, that may have been just what you needed to stop feeling so emotionally exhausted.

You may lose close friends and family

and this could be because they enjoyed how available you had been before and then don't like the fact that you're not as free for them.

You may strengthen your relationships with close friends and family

people who value you will respect your boundaries.

Prior to brunching, I used to visit my friends all the time to hang out. When I told them I was tired of always being the one to visit them, and that I wanted them to come see me, two of them did, and two of them did not. Guess who I still talk to?

Some people rise, some people, don't but most importantly, you've chosen to keep yourself feeling comfortable instead of stressing about things you can't control.

Brunching is a romanticized way of taking better care of yourself. Have fun with it, or don't, just vibe because you deserve to have peace of mind.

xoxo

Your favourite daughter of the moon,

Selene 🌚

[mammonshuman92]

- Watched - Pt.3

(Mammon x GN!MC)

**TW: cussing, stalking, kidnapping, religion, 

Note: C/N (coworker name)

-

“Man, I’m starvin’. What’s takin’ so long anyway?” He grumbled, remembering the whole ‘first name basis’ thing with the delivery driver. 

He was laid on his back across your bed scrolling through social media, impatiently waiting for you to return. His stomach started to growl.

“Maybe I should go check? But, MC said to stay here so no one could see me.” He said to himself, a slight pout on his lips.

He heard a small shuffling noise come from the living room, it sounded like a paper bag crinkling.

Ok, ya got the food, now don’t be tryin’ to chit chat MC, I know how ya are. I’m dyin’ in here!

The bedroom was a straight shot down the hall from the door, making it impossible to sneak a quick peek without fully exposing himself.

He could hear you talking back and forth with...Alex. He huffed to himself remembering your chumminess with the take out guy. Something just seemed weird to him about the whole thing. 

Somethin’ is fishy about him always havin’ MC’s route or whatever. Does nobody else deliver for that place? I bet he’s got a crush on MC or somethin’. 

“I’ll kick his ass.” He said out loud, his own thoughts making him sour.

He listened again, trying to hear what was being said. He couldn’t hear any actual words, but he could hear Alex’s voice. Barely, though.

Wait a minute.. Is he whisperin’? What’s he gotta say to MC that requires whisperin’?! I gotta get outta here.

Mammon was getting himself worked up, assuming this delivery guy was confessing his love to you. He’d nearly convinced himself to march out there and confront the creep. To hell with staying hidden!

Before he could blow his cover, he heard something hit the front door followed by more shuffling movement. He calmed down a bit, thinking the noises he heard were of you getting the food inside and trying to kick the door shut.

He impatiently waited for you to call out, telling him the coast was clear and that he could finally come eat. But, you didn’t.

After a couple minutes passed with no new noise, he grew slightly anxious.

He stood up and started pacing beside the bed, feeling antsy.

C’mon, MC. What’re ya doin’? I’m witherin’ away! Before long I’m gonna shrink up and turn into a Little D or somethin’..

Suddenly, he heard voices again. Well, just the delivery guy’s voice, still a hushed tone. He groaned to himself.

“If he don’t hurry up and go away, I’m gonna eat him instead.” He grumbled quietly to himself.

Something didn’t feel right though. Why was Alex’s voice the only one he heard? It had been at least five minutes since he heard you say something. It’s not like he just missed what you said because you were too quiet for him to hear, or you just chose not to contribute to the guy’s conversation.

You always talk, to basically anyone you come in contact with, never really knowing a stranger. He’s pretty sure you haven’t gone five minutes without talking since he met you. That’s why it seemed so weird to him. 

That alone wasn’t really enough to expose himself though, was it? 

To say you’ve been through a lot lately is an understatement. You’re sleep deprived and your nerves are shot. With everything that’s been going on, it would be more weird if you didn’t act a little different. He didn’t blame you for not being your usual self.

He still couldn’t shake this feeling though.

A sudden, loud noise outside got his attention.

Was that a car door?

He moved quickly, putting his back against the wall, scooting over to the doorway.

“MC? Is he gone?” He whispered.

No answer.

Screw it.

Very slowly, he peeked his head around the corner, careful not to be seen.

“MC?” He whispered again, louder this time. 

Still nothing.

Somethin’ is definitely wrong..

He fully emerged in the doorway, eyes darting around, taking in his surroundings. As he quickly made his way up the hall, he noticed the door standing wide open. He could see that an older model car was parked in front of the house and you were no where in sight.

Hand still on the door knob, he turned around to call out into the house, “MC, where ya at? Ya know ya left the door-”

Before he could finish, the car outside suddenly accelerated, kicking up dirt and rocks as they sped off.

What the..?

“Guess he didn’t like his tip..?” He whispered to himself.

He shut the door and turned around slowly, only taking a couple steps before he came to a stop. He couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling he had.

“Oi, MC! D-don’t ya know you’re supposed to answer when THE Great Mammon calls for ya?” He waited, but the house was still. All he could hear was his heartbeat in his ears.

He walked further into the house, quickly looking around the kitchen before heading back down the hall.

Why ain’t they answerin’.. c-could it..? Nah..

“This ain’t funny ya know..” He called through the house, hoping that you’d somehow slipped past him. 

Again, he was met with bone chilling silence.

Slowly, he started piecing all the little weird things that didn’t make sense together like a puzzle. The silent house and wide open door, abandoned food, the car speeding away.. 

The same delivery guy somehow always having this route...

His heart sank.

No, no, no, no!

He ran from room to room in a panic, desperately calling out to you, begging you to answer him.

This ain’t happenin’.. They gotta be hidin’ or something. Yeah, that’s it!

“MC! Where are ya? Talk to me, please!” He screamed, voice breaking around the hard lump forming in his throat, tears beginning to prick at his eyes.

No, it can’t be.. It can’t be..

With trembling hands, he dug his phone from his pocket, quickly dialing your number.

“C’mon, pick up. Please, please pick up.” He pleaded as he paced the floor.

His stomach dropped when he heard it ringing within the house, quickly following the sound until he found it on the coffee table where you had left it earlier. He stood there unmoving, staring at his picture and contact name with hearts on the screen, tears streaking down his face.

The weight of it all came crashing down like a tsunami, forcing him to his knees. With his face in his hands, he sobbed uncontrollably.

I shoulda listened to my gut when I thought somethin’ was wrong! Why did I wait so long to look for ‘em?! He took MC, he took MC! Dammit!

How did he let this happen? He was right here, right here, and he didn’t sense the danger. He couldn't protect you again, letting you fall right into the hands of the psycho creep who had been relentlessly harassing you, who was planning to do who knows what.

He had to do something. Anything. 

Get the hell up! Ya gotta go find MC NOW! There’s no tellin’ what this creep is gonna try.

He stood up and wiped his face, trying to compose himself as he switched into demon form.

“I can still catch ‘em!” He made a beeline for the door, stopping abruptly as he reached the thresh hold.

“Wait, it’s the middle of the day and this ain’t the Devildom. A demon flyin’ around on a man hunt would be real bad.” He thought aloud.

People would most likely panic and if history proves anything, nothing good ever comes from humans when they panic.

He had to try and think rationally, as hard as it was. He wanted to rush in and save you as quick as he could, but going in blind without a decent plan could get you hurt...or possibly worse.

He switched out of demon form and moved back into the living room, trying to come up with an idea.

Your phone was here so he couldn’t have you tracked by GPS and he didn’t remember much about the car except that it was older. He didn’t even know what the guy looked like since he’d had to hide. All he knew about him was his first name and that he worked at a restaurant. 

“The take out place would for sure have everything about him on file!” He quickly punched in the name of the place into his phone’s search engine, then suddenly paused.

“Wait a minute..I can’t just waltz in there and ask for someone’s personal info. They’d call the cops or somethin’. Damn!”

He was beginning to feel hysterical. He didn’t have much to go on and every idea he came up with was crap. A few ‘ding’ sounds from the coffee table tore him from his thoughts. It was your phone.

Someone named C/N had sent you a couple texts about work and judging by the text log, you talked to them often.

“Man, I hope this C/N knows somethin’ cause I’ve got nothin’ else to go on..” 

Luckily, he remembered the name of the coffee shop, having heard you talk about work often. A quick internet search and he had the directions. He was out the door like a shot.

With his newfound breadcrumb, he was one step closer to finding you.

-

A bell chimed above the door when he entered the shop, alerting the worker behind the counter of his presence.

“Hi, how can I help you?” They greeted him as he walked up to the counter.

“Hey, is there a C/N here by any chance?”

“Oh, uh, yeah just a sec.” They went through a doorway behind the counter, returning moments later with another person in tow.

“Hello..? I’m sorry, do I know you?” They asked, approaching Mammon, visibly confused.

“No, but you know MC, right?” He asked, uninterested in beating around the bush.

“I’m not sure I can answer that.” They said cautiously, visibly tense.

They do know somethin’.

“Here, look.” He said, pulling up the gallery on his phone, showing them multiple pictures of you and MC together.

“Oh, so you’re the boyfriend. MC has told me about you. Uh, anyway, is there something I can help you with? I need to get back to work..”

“Yeah, has MC ever mentioned anythin’ about a guy named Alex before?” He asked.

Please, please, please

“Alex..Alex..” They repeated, tapping a finger on their chin as they thought it over. “They did, actually. We went to the movies about two months ago, and ran into a guy they knew. It was their usual deliver guy I think? Said his name was Alex. He gave me the creeps.” They explained.

“Why is that?”

Yes! We’re gettin’ somewhere.

“He just seemed..I don’t know, off? And when I met him, I actually remembered seeing him a few days earlier on my way to work. There was another A.T.A. protest and I saw him in the group demonstrators. He denied being there when I brought it up, saying it had to be his doppelganger or something, but I know it was him. When we ran into him at the movies he said he had just got off work, and he was wearing the exact same shirt and hat as the day of the protest.” They informed him.

“Wait, A.T.A.? What’s that?” He asked curiously.

“Anti-Treaty Association. They’re exactly what the name suggests. Everyone involved in the exchange program is public knowledge. Names, pictures, updates on how the program was going, etc. All easily found on any search engine. If he is part of the A.T.A., why would he be friendly with MC? There’s no way he didn’t know who they were.” They said.

This Alex guy is definitely the stalker. I bet if I dig into this A.T.A. I can find him..

“Alright. Thanks for your help.” He said as he turned to leave, C/N took a few steps after him.

“Hey, uh, is MC okay? I know they haven’t been themselves lately, but uh, you coming here and asking all these questions kinda scares me..” They admitted, fear for their friend written on their face.

“MC is uh, goin’ through some stuff. I’m gonna put an end to it though.” His voice was rough, angry. His face however, was full of desperation and sadness.

Mammon thanked C/N again for their information and left the coffee shop on a new mission. He uncovered another piece of the puzzle, new information that could lead him to you.

No one knew exactly what this guy was capable of, but he had the most important piece of Mammon's existence with him. There wasn’t anything he wasn’t willing to do, in any realm, to bring you back safely. He would breach the Celestial Gates without thinking twice if it would bring you back to him.

He was going to show them exactly why he's the second strongest of the seven rulers of the underworld.

I’m comin’ MC. I will find ya, I promise.

-

“Get out.”

The scorching heat inside the trunk made you nauseous, and severely thirsty. You felt weak and disoriented, unable to move much. You weren’t sure how long you had been stuck in there before you finally felt the car come to a stop. The lid opened, blazing sunshine poured inside the dark space, making your eyes water and squint reflexively.

“I said, get out!” He screamed.

He wrapped his hand around your wrist hard and yanked you from the trunk, letting you drop to the ground. You were much to weak to try and brace yourself so you fell pretty hard, getting small scrapes and dirt on your elbows and forearms.

You tried to open your eyes to try and get an idea of where he had taken you, but before they could adjust to the blinding sunlight, he tied something around your eyes.

“Can’t have you trying to escape.” He said to himself, as he finished tying up your hands. The restraints were very tight, already starting to hurt your wrists.

“I’m not going to.” You said weakly, your words making him laugh.

“Well, at least your a smart demon slut. Somewhat, anyway.”

Honestly, you weren’t planning to escape. If the opportunity presented itself, you would make a run for it, but you weren’t actively looking for an escape route. However, you had no intention of giving this creep what he wanted, or giving up without one hell of a fight.

Pulling you by the restraint around your wrists, he began to drag you across the ground. He let go of you a minute or so later. He didn’t drag you very far, ending up in some kind of building judging by the change in temperature and the rough feeling of concrete beneath you. It felt a little cooler in here as if you were out of direct sunlight, but the air was still fairly hot and sticky.

You did your best to pay attention to the things around you. The sounds, smells, what little you could feel. Outside you could hear cows in the distance and some kind of humming noise. It was definitely hot, but more like that humid feeling before it storms. You could also smell it too, the incoming rain. That warm earthy smell.

You could hear Alex nearby messing with something metal, there was also the sound of running water somewhere close.

I can’t believe Alex was actually the stalker this entire time... Explains how pictures taken of me from outside my house though.. I wonder what he plans to do..

You promptly chased away those thoughts in order to keep yourself calm, replacing them with thoughts of him, the time you’d spent together along with all the memories that came with it.

How soft and fluffy his hair felt when ran your fingers through it. The way he smelled; not the Devilish No.5, although you did love it, it’s smell closely related to the famous human world version, but his smell. Crisp and clean like fresh laundry or new clothes, slightly smoky like leather because of his favorite jacket and small undertones of warm cinnamon and vanilla.

The always groaned about your selection for movie night but was the first one to get really into it. Having a concert while cooking when you had kitchen duty together, getting in trouble for talking and laughing in class and later being scolded by Lucifer for it. How he always used to complain how bad humans smell, only to find out he started buying your brand of body wash for himself and would also try to casually smell his hoodie after you’d worn it.

The thought of never seeing him again, never experiencing anymore memories like these or the chance to make new ones, kept haunting you. A hard lump was forming in your throat, tears beginning to prick your eyes.

“Aw, what’s the matter darlin’? The abomination you chose as a lover isn’t rushing in to save you like Prince Charming? Imagine that.” He spat. 

You ignored his sarcastic comments, wanting answers of you own, “Why are you doing this?” You could hear him walking toward you, his footsteps getting louder as he approached. The sound stopped abruptly, then he crouched down next to your head.

“I told you, you need to be cleansed.” His tone was very matter-of-fact.

He grabbed your wrist restraint again and drug you another ten feet or so. Easily picking you up and hoisting you into the air until the rope around your wrists caught on something. He let go, your full weight coming down on your restraint. You were suspended in the air, feet barely skimming the floor. 

He checked your ropes to make sure it was still secure with the added weight and gravity, then he removed your blindfold. The sudden change causing you to blink several times.

Your previous assumptions had been right, you appeared to be in a warehouse that had been abandoned for quite some time. Most of the windows were broken, big vines and other foliage creeping into the building. The rusted remnants of machinery scattered around the large, open room. You looked above you to see that you were hanging from a large hook that was suspended by thick chain from a metal beam up above. Far to your left you could see what looked like a large pool or even one of those big basins you usually use to water cattle, with a hose draped over the side. There’s the source of the running water you heard.  

Wait...a stock tank with water, ’cleansed’...is he going to..baptize me?

“Cleansed? That’s been mentioned quite a bit in the dozens of letters I’ve been getting. Well, you would know, huh? Since you’re the one behind it all. What I don’t understand is why?” 

It came off as more sarcastic than you intended, but you didn’t really care. You had been terrified for weeks about the stalker. What would they do when they finally got to you? You haven’t truly felt alone in over a month, as if someone was always hiding in the shadows watching, waiting. Your anxiety has been through the roof and you’re in a nearly constant state of paranoia and fear. 

But, now that he was in front of you, you didn’t feel scared. You wanted answers.

“Because they don’t belong with our kind. Uniting our realms is blasphemy and will throw the human world into chaos.”

‘Don’t belong with our kind’..? Whoa, what the hell..

“Blasphemy? But, the Celestial Realm is on board with it. The angels in the exchange progr-” He cut you off before you could finish, his sudden booming voice echoed through the spacious warehouse, startling you.

He stood with his back to you, facing a long metal table that looked as if it used to be a conveyor or some other piece that once belonged to one of the old machines inside the long forgotten building.

“The exchange program was a joke! Those devils just needed a good cover to get their claws on our realm so they could take it over! Using their dirty tricks and magic to bring corruption and pollute us with sin.” He stared you down like a mad man while he yelled.

This was so bizarre, he sounded insane. Like, one of those people that wore tin foil hats. This version of Alex, the real one, was scary. You would’ve never guessed in a million years that this guy was the same one that you talked about the weather and current events with a few times a week.

“None of that is even remotely true! They just want to bring peace among the realms, to prove that they are not what all the harmful, hateful rhetoric claims they are. So we can all just co-exist! That was the entire point of the exchange program! To learn about the Devildom; it’s people and culture.” You fought back.

His face twisted up in disgust, visibly becoming more and more agitated every time you spoke. He stalked closer, stopping maybe six feet in front of you, staring at you intently.

“That kind of thinking is exactly why you need to be cleansed. You’re a human, or has being a demon whore and becoming the embodiment of sin made you forget that? You are nothing but a weak, powerless human to them. A pawn in their bigger plan, collateral damage if things went wrong.” 

You never cared what assumptions people made or the rumors they started regarding your stay in the Devildom. However, when the very demons you loved and cared about became the subject of people’s whispering, you were willing to fight with no intentions of backing down.

You, out of everyone, who had to live in the House of Lamentation for a year, escaped death from a couple of the brothers, helped them mend familial bonds, and held pacts with all of them, should know better than anyone, exactly who they are.

“You don’t know anything about them!” You yelled lurching forward as you filled with anger, lightly swinging back and forth where you were suspended, the thick chains above you clanking, “The things they’ve been through, they things they’ve seen. The sacrifices they had to make..” You heart ached for them. What happened during the Great Celestial War, their fall.. They’ve been through a great deal and they, along with the rest of the Devildom, are undeserving of such prejudiced hatred. 

“Being demons doesn’t automatically mean they are bad people, just like being human doesn’t make you good.” You stared him down, lacing venom in your words. He squinted his eyes at you, unhappy with your implications. “That fact was thoroughly proven during my time there. Some of kindest people I have ever met, as well as the people I love and cherish the most, are demons.”

You would forever stand behind the program, your now second home, and all the friends and loved ones you made along the way. No matter what this psycho could come up with, you would not be swayed. You knew them for who they are, all Alex knew was hatred.

He scoffed at your words, walking toward you as he shook his head in disgust, eyes boring into yours. He stopped just inches in front of your face. You held onto your resolve, staring back at him intently, not letting him see that you were completely terrified. It’s what he wanted; to feel superior and pass judgement on those he deemed unworthy.

You weren’t going to give him the satisfaction though; to feed his ego, his delusions. You refused to bow to fear, instead giving it all you had to make sure that if this was how it would end for you, you would fight against his prejudice and hatred until your final moments.

“We will start with the normal cleansing.” He backed away from you, confirming your suspicions as he gestured to the stock tank. “Although I think your soul might be too far gone for it to be completely effective.” He smiled wickedly as he turned around, going back to the table he’d been at earlier and picked up the same knife he’d held to you when he kidnapped you. The only other weapons you could see on the table were a baton and a taser. There was also a thick book you could only assume was a bible and a large jar of water. The most concerning however, was the gas can, thick work gloves, and what looked a lot like a body bag.

“This may call for a more extensive purification.” 

PART FOUR COMING SOON!

[collisiondiscourse]

on the wonder duo (part 1)

(BNHA Analysis Post Ahead! This isn’t explicitly romantic, but it is an analysis of the relationship between the two most popular characters in BNHA--Katsuki Bakugou and Izuku Midoriya. Split into two posts because I realized that this was gonna be long as HELL)

yall ever think about the fact that the wonder duo is perfectly set up in so that bakugou and deku together are the better version of all might?

bc like. ive been thinking.

everyone knows the win to save and save to win parallel. How they are supposedly two halves of a whole perfect hero (which, previously, was defined as all might)

but ever since bakugou and deku started working as one—growing together to win AND save and continuously reminding each other that they shouldnt try to do things alone, ive realized that its BECAUSE theres two of them that they surpass all might. its not a case of deku and bakugou both being 50% of an ideal hero, but rather i think that they are 100% of what all might SHOULD HAVE BEEN from the very beginning.

as early as the AM v AFO battle in kamino, we see the effects of all mights flawed existence. the fact that he, the greatest and supposedly infallible symbol of peace, was destroyed—society had begun to collapse. there was suddenly no pillar to hold people together and the impacts were so severe that even in the latest chapters of mha it keeps on getting worse. the truth is, all mights biggest mistake was the burden he placed on his own shoulders

with bakugou and deku... its different.

its different for them because down to their attributions, they seem like two halves of a whole person.

i think that the wonder duo are going to surpass all might because of the fact that they work together.

@bakugoukatsuki-rising @svpercraigus @tybee​ @isaustraliaathing​

(batshit crazy and conspiratorial essay under the cut !)

1. Complementary Colors

I’d like to first preface literally everything I say by the fact that I am not an expert analyzer or literary major in any way. I am literally just some random fan on the internet who has wayyy too much time and looks wayyy too deep into things, but here we go!

A common thing we see when we talk about bakugou and deku is the way they are... sort of an inverse of one another.

Down to the design of their features and the way they move, Deku is the obviously softer of the two. There’s an intentional contrast between the two of them, in the way that Deku’s drawn with round shapes and curvy hair and the way Bakugou is literally all spikes and half-mast eyes and rough muscles. Bakugou’s movements too are languid and showy, with the way he leans when he walks and splays his legs and kicks open doors. Katsuki, in a casual sense, is loud and dramatic. 

Deku on the other hand s finicky. He jitters when he walks and he’s often fidgeting and mumbling. Comparatively, the aura he radiates is energetic and frenzied, even self-conscious to a point unlike Bakugou’s calm and confident movements.

the point is, there’s a clear difference in how either of them are designed and what exactly they are supposed to represent. They utterly complement each other down to the way they behave and even their main colors (red-orange and blue-green) being literal complementary colors.

Now, moving to my more ungrounded points, this is quite a bit of a stretch so I’ll try as much as possible to make sense of these with hyperlinked sources because. yeah.

Down to their names, I think Deku and Bakugou both symbolize something deeper. I think that the way Hori expresses characters and what they’re meant to do is something that we have to pay close attention to when we talk about the Wonder Duo’s rise to success.

Izuku Midoriya (緑谷 出久), as some of us may know, does have an interesting meaning when broken up. According to a lovely fan translation of his name, ‘Izuku’--while not an actual name used commonly in real life--means to ‘Come out’ or ‘Long time’. ‘Midoriya’ on the other hand means (Midori) ‘Green’ and (ya) ‘valley’. The translator further pointed out that his first name ‘Izuku’ could be a reference to him being the first legendary hero to come out of the long-running All Might Era. (or, if you’ve been reading @/bakugoukatsuki-rising’s posts, the first significant anime protag in a long while to come out as queer, ppfft)

but that isn’t my focus right now.

We know that Hori LOVES telling stories with names, and more often than not in the BNHA universe, names alone tell us a lot of things about the characters. When referring to Izuku’s last name, Midoriya, it’s important I think to step back and realize that hey, maybe there’s something more to Green Valley than just the fact that his motif is all green.

After searching for a lil on the specifics of green valley, I’ve found out that across many cultures, the colour green and valleys in general tend to represent life. From dream analysts, to Christianity, and even old Taoist teachings, valleys are seen as areas of fertility and escape. They are seen as safe havens and often escapes for people to come to after running away from bad circumstances.

(Sound familiar?)

Deku, in essence represents life and peace. He represents being the “salvation” that the world in BNHA needed. To me, it sounds like Horikoshi is trying to say that he is the long-awaited hero in the sense. The one that people can feel will create a society that feels safe for everyone after years of All Might just saving people from themselves as a band-aid solution.

On the other hand, we have Katsuki Bakugou (爆豪 勝己), who’s name we commonly know means (Katsuki) Winner and (Bakugou) Explosion Master. He is essentially, the champion. The power. His name means success and power and all the things that make up winning.

When putting them side by side, it then becomes increasingly... interesting to me how their names almost perfectly slot into All Might’s save to win and win to save mantra, and how they are both quintessential parts to what made All Might as a hero.

2. Hero Too!

Now, I’m not even gonna really TOUCH much of what happens in canon. If you want me to do a step by step breakdown of their arcs in regards to the plot of manga and anime, feel free to send me a gratuitous ko-fi tip so I can pay for the headache I get after trying to organize my thoughts into word vomit.

What I WILL talk about on the other hand, is the subtle shift both of them slowly have in regards to how they look. Bakugou and Deku, while growing up, seem to have MANY many parallels--but before I elaborate on all of that, I wanna talk about something else.

Detour: Deku’s Red Shoes 

We all know the iconic symbol being Deku’s red shoes. For all his life, save for some outfits like his hero one, we see Deku more often than not wearing his signature red sneakers which have become a running joke in fandom.

But the funny thing is, in Japan, red shoes seem to have an interesting connotation.

In 1922, a popular Japanese nursery rhyme was written, called “Red Shoes”. The interesting part to me about this song was the symbolism that, in my tiny pea-sized brain, I could connect to the story of BNHA.

The story goes that there was a little girl with red shoes named ‘Kimi’. She was from Shizuoka prefecture (which, if you didn’t know, is most likely where Musutafu supposedly is) and was raised by a single mother. When she was young, her mother had to entrust her with a foreigner under the impression that they would give her a better life in America. The stranger is a man named Charles Hewitt (who was described to have blue eyes) and supposedly took her away. 

The singer of the song (supposedly the mother, but some argue it was written from the perspective of a childhood friend) believes that Kimi is happy and living a better life away from them, when the reality of the situation was much worse. The young girl with red shoes in actuality had Tuberculosis, and thus the foreigner whom she was entrusted to had left her to fend for herself and eventually left her to go to America while she died alone and orphaned.

“When I see red shoes, I think of her.”

A very interesting story with very interesting implications indeed.

-

Anyway, moving on to the more... “nuanced” and connected parts of this section, I have every reason to believe that Bakugou and Deku were simply MEANT to be working together down to how they dress. Now, I’d like to discuss their hero costumes.

At the start of their series, using these godawful pics for reference, it’s clear to see that neither of them seem alike in any way--reflecting the dissonance in their relationship at that point in canon.

ough. deku why. (yes we know why its because you love your mom you stupid little bunny <3)

Anyway, we see an immediate gap in how the two of them are. Deku’s first costume is one that reflects how he treated his dream of being a hero. He was still in that childlike idolization phase, the one where his dreams and aspirations were hinged on pure feelings and inspiration from All Might. Katsuki on the other hand was a lot more tactical--professional to an extent. The gap between their respective development with their quirks is something that is clearly felt in every fashion decision they’d made.

(Notice how Deku’s green is a lot brighter and less like the green accents Katsuki has all over his costume.)

As time progressed however... their costumes changed. The colors, the silhouettes, the practical functions, most things.

(Deku’s Gamma Costume and Bakugou’s Winter Costume used respectively)

we begin to notice a few similarities.

As the show goes on and we see more evolutions of their costumes, it almost seems like they begin to look like a matching pair. Deku’s green grows darker and almost teal in nature, while Bakugou’s orange is veering towards red territory. This is important to note because red-orange and blue-green as I said earlier were complementary colors as compared to simply orange and green. The minute shift is something I really wasn’t quite sure was intentional, but something I find interesting to pick up nonetheless as the colors they used to accent their costumes begin to match up.

Secondly, I think and important thing to note is silhouettes. The way that both Bakugou and Deku’s costumes are designed follow a lot of parallels that typically we don’t see with the rest of 1-A. For one, they both have a combination of tight long-sleeved tops with a bulkier set of bottoms. They also share the use of utility belts and metal pieces typically worn around their necks. Deku has his bunny-eared hood that mimics All Might’s hair, while Bakugou has his orange and black explosion ear-pieces that mimic his own quirk.

i don’t think any other people in class 1-A match each other as subtly yet strongly as these two. Uraraka and Deku and Bakugou and Kirishima do come close however.

“But Codi, you fucking knob!” I hear you plea. “This is such a reach and tells us practically NOTHING!” And yes, I’m inclined to agree with you! You’d be sort of right in the idea that this is a reach. Maybe I am looking too much into this, and maybe it really isn’t that deep--but I do think that them subconsciously matching outfits means something quite brilliant.

In the way that their costumes are designed, each aspect of either outfits have a very logical explanation. The changes were strategic and made with their fighting styles vividly in mind, so what that tells me is that BECAUSE these costumes are so complementary or similar in nature (Bakugou’s reinforcing his arms while Deku reinforces his legs), these two are implicitly showing the audience that their combat styles are complementary as well. 

The evolution of their design choices and similarities tell us that even unknowingly, their minds line up in strategy on the battlefield--a clear exhibit for why they would be INCREDIBLY POWERFUL as a Hero Duo to begin with.

When I look at their hero costumes side by side, I see a mirror. I see the way that these two are reflections of each other and are strong where the other isn’t. The point I see in BNHA repeatedly is that EVERYONE HAS A WEAKNESS. Nothing is infallible, regardless of how hard you train or how powerful your quirk is. Everyone will always have a weakness, but the significant difference I see when fandom discusses the future of Pro-Hero Society is that the new generation is finally raising itself to be RELIANT on each other. 

Observing their fighting styles and the simple use of their quirks, its obvious that they are indeed two parts of a whole hero. Bakugou, who’s quirk emphasized his arms and hands and the power that comes from it, while Deku who’s quirk now emphasizes his legs and lower body and the way he’s always running to save people.

IN CONCLUSION:

As they become heroes, it is easy to assume that if nothing else, Bakugou and Deku will cover each other’s weak spots (especially when you consider the way Deku probably won’t be able to keep using his arms with the way both the anime and manga are going...) (also chapter 285, anyone?)

-

Part Two: Interactions, OfA

kofi || commission details

[guccifloralsuits]

this is literally me screaming into your void because i dont have the energy to keep a diary despite every molecule in me telling me to start one, and i dont want to say this somewhere people recognise me lol. anyways i feel like my largest show of vulnerability and intimacy with anyone would be to truly show them how much of a dumb bitch i am. literally all the spaces/friend groups i'm in: irl, online, even online classes, i've somehow either cultivated a reputation of being supersmart (1/?)

(2/?) or i just don't talk much when i know opening my mouth will reveal how less i know and as i type this i realise this is such a #firstworldproblem but i realised that when i need to rant i go to anonymous spaces instead of relatively normal ones like the #venting channel in the multiple discord servers i'm in and literally the moment i start forming an identity in an anonymous space (i see the irony), i stop being open and honest beyond a point and move on to a new anonymous space or

(3/3) friend group and it's resulted in me having different parts of myself in different spaces and therefore when i sit and wonder who is/are that person(s) who i can call at 2 am in a jail cell with the faith that they will bail me out... i realise i won't call anyone and probably ask some random stranger for help. and i realise that's what i'm doing right now but yeah. how are you?

Okay, so there’s a lot here. I would start by saying the need to seem smart/constantly prove yourself to others as Smart And Intelligent stems from a dissatisfaction with how you perceive yourself in your own mind - and an (if not conscious) at least subconscious fear that people won’t like you if you “mess up” and seem less put together than you actually are. and I promise A) it’s an unfounded fear but also B) working on your self perception will do the most to help you feel comfortable just being you with no reservations.

2) I think it’s actually normal to act differently around certain people. I don’t think it makes you disingenuous or #fake, but we share different aspects of ourselves with different people, and sometimes those parts are contradictory. That’s perfectly okay. We can be different versions of ourselves to everyone. And that’s human, it doesn’t make you not true to yourself, etc

On friends, I...really do get it. I never really had a ride-or-die friend until I met my best friend in college, and while my friends were ~fun~ and enjoyable, I never really could rely on them, ya know? But you’ll find the right people who you can start taking your walls down around. It may take time, but you will

Internet spaces can be....hard to navigate too. I’m not like. I definitely have an Online Personality too that isn’t a complete representation of myself. But it’s still an aspect of who I am, and is honest. Does any of this even make sense? But I’m here for you and the internet especially should just...be how you want it to be, at the end of the day. Your blog/etc is for YOU first and foremost

[kayluh1915]

Homecoming

Summary: Gavin returns from a two-week-long business trip. He's exhausted but very happy to see Ryan again.

Words: 1987

Warnings: Tooth-rotting fluff... dat’s all, folks!

Nothing can stop my Freewood addiction at this point... ya'bitch is hooked so expect more.¯\_(ツ)_/¯

THIS FIC IS A REPOST! I dun did fucked up and posted a major fandom no-no which I feel SUPER terrible about. I'm still learning the rules of this side of the internet and I made a mistake. So, here's me correcting it because respect for the people involved is always my #1 priority! If you want more context, you can read this post I made earlier. Hopefully, my future mistakes will be less yikes™ in the future.

As always, comments are welcomed and encouraged... even if it's to call out a no-no!

Even with the rewrites, I'm VERY pleased with how this turned out even if it didn't pan out how I expected it to. I hope you can now finally enjoy it the way I do if you choose to give me a second chance. <3

Read on AO3!

The airport was busy. Far too busy for a Wednesday evening, Ryan thought, but he didn’t pay much attention to the unusual foot traffic. He was more focused on listening for the announcement that Gavin’s flight from London had landed. He hadn’t seen him in a little over two weeks and it was starting to get to him. Of course, Gavin’s busy traveling schedule was nothing new to him, but no matter how often he packed his bags it would always be hard for Ryan to watch him depart and even harder to wait for his return.

His heart leaped in his chest when the familiar ding came over the intercom, but he disappointedly settled back down into his chair when it was just a last call for another airline. Ryan took off his grey AH hat to run a nervous hand through his hair, setting the worn thing aside as he absentmindedly reached for his phone. He didn’t expect to have anything new since it had only been not five minutes since he’d checked it last, but to his surprise, he had a new message from Dan. He opened it and smiled wide when he saw that he had sent him a series of photos of Gavin while he was away on his trip.

Some showed him on set, completely engrossed in his cameras while others were more… unorthodox. His favorite, in particular, was the one of Gavin hanging upside down in a hotel bed making the most ridiculous face he had ever seen him make… and he’d seen a lot of Gavin's faces. Dan was also in the photo, sitting on the floor beside him and making a face of a similar caliber.

"You should post the hotel one on Instagram." Ryan texted back, only half joking. Dan replying almost immediately.

"You’re kidding, right? He'd bloody murder me when he flies back here next week." Ryan continued to scroll through the pictures Dan had sent him, the smile on his face only growing wider with each one. Gavin sends him photos while he’s away as well and he enjoys every single one, but Dan… he got the ones Ryan really wanted. The ones of Gavin being carefree and enjoying time with one of his oldest friends, his eyes crinkled up with laughter and his bright smile lighting up Ryan’s previously darkened world.

Just when he had finished looking through the pictures, Dan sent one more and Ryan stopped breathing for a solid five seconds. It was a photo of Gavin at a cafe somewhere in Paris right as the sun was setting, the golden rays kissing his skin as he sipped at the drink in his hands. His green eyes were glassed over, clearly so lost in his own head that he probably didn’t even realize that Dan had taken a photo.

“Forgot one, sorry. Figured you’d enjoy this one.” Ryan swallowed hard.

“Understatement of the fucking year.” Dan only replied with three laughing emojis as Ryan set the photo as both his home and lock screen. He didn’t want to live another day without seeing that picture of Gavin. He flat out refused it.

Ryan was so obsessed with looking at the photo that he had nearly missed the announcement he had been waiting for all this time. He hastily pocketed his phone and put his hat back on, sprinting towards the terminal and bouncing anxiously on his heels. Incoming passengers started flooding in, Ryan skimming each one of them for the pair of emerald eyes he had missed so much. Finally, after what seemed like an endless stream of strangers, he finally saw him. He wasn’t nearly as groomed as he had been in the cafe photo. His hair was a mess and he looked exhausted and in need of a hot shower, but that didn’t matter to Ryan. Even when tousled up, he was still beautiful in his eyes.

He watched as Gavin looked over the crowd for him, smiling wide when he had finally found him. Gavin ran into his arms as fast as he could, Ryan hugging him tightly while placing kisses atop his disheveled hair.

“Missed you…” Gavin mumbled, his voice muffled in Ryan’s chest. He only hugged his Brit tighter, pulling his face off his chest to place a tender kiss on his forehead.

“Missed you too. So much…” Gavin flashed Ryan a tired smile, reaching up to properly kiss him. “Was your flight okay?” Gavin sighed, looking over the crowd of his fellow passengers.

“It was quite shit, to be honest.”

“Uh oh... What happened?” Gavin waved him off.

“Later, Love? I’m exhausted and would like to go home to my cat.” Ryan chuckled, kissing Gavin once more.

“Later it is, then. C’mon, let’s get your bags and get you outta here.” Ryan walked with Gavin to baggage claim, his right hand gently resting on the small of Gavin’s back.

“Dan sent me some lovely photos of you right before you landed.” Gavin’s face blushed red, gently face-palming himself.

“Shit... Which ones?” Ryan took out his phone and showed him the one of him and Dan at the hotel. Gav groaned.

“I wish I could tell you that we were drunk or something to justify that, but we were sober. There’s literally no excuse for it…” Ryan laughed, kissing Gavin’s cheek.

“Well, I enjoyed it regardless.” Gavin hummed in response, laying his head down onto Ryan’s shoulder and going silent for a moment.

“I’m so tired, Rye…” He whined, Ryan gently rubbing Gavin's back where his hand had been resting.

“I know, Dear. We’ll be heading home as soon as we grab your bags.”

“Can’t we just leave’em?” He groaned, leaning more of his weight into Ryan.

“You want to leave a $100,000.00 Phantom at the airport?” Gavin scoffed.

“Gotta go back next week, so why not?”

“Hey now, you just got here. Let’s not talk about you leaving again until we have to.” Ryan joked… sort of. Gavin hummed again, the couple going silent after that. His bags finally came in on the belt, Ryan grabbing each one carefully. He wasn’t quite sure which one had Gavin’s Phantom so he was playing it safe with each one.

“Phantom’s in that one. Lenses and small HD in that one. The others you can manhandle for all I care.” Gavin called out, Ryan going way too slow for his liking. Ryan laughed and shook his head.

“Getting a little grumpy on me, aren’t ya?” He joked, Gavin obviously way too tired to deal with his bullshit.

“I just want to go home… please...” Ryan grabbed his bags, holding his hand out in front of him.

“Lead the way, Darling. I’m right behind ya.” ______________________

When Ryan pulled into the garage, he looked over at Gavin to find him knocked completely out, the sudden silence of the car being filled with his soft, heavy breathing. Ryan smiled lovingly at him, getting out of the car and grabbing Gavin’s bags as quietly as he could. He sat the Phantom and his equipment in the office and took his other bags to the laundry room, returning to the car to retrieve his exhausted Brit. He lifted him into his arms, trying his best to not disturb him, but to no avail, his lover stirring as soon as he closed the door to the garage.

“Pu-me down…” He grumbled, gently squirming in Ryan’s grip. “I need a shower and wanna see Smee.” Ryan listened, gently lowering Gavin to his feet and following him into the living room. The 6-year-old siamese in question was standing on the counter, meowing loudly when he saw Gavin. He wasn’t really allowed on the counters, but he gave him a pass just this one time. He lifted the cat into his arms and kissed his head.

“Missed you too, bud.” Ryan made his way over to the cabinet, looking for something to make. He had been too excited to see Gavin and had skipped dinner, but it had caught up with him now that Gavin was home.

“You want anything to eat, Dear?” Gavin thought for a moment, still reuniting with his beloved cat.

“A bit too tired for a meal, to be honest, but I have a feeling you’re going to make me eat anyway so sure.” Ryan smirked. Gavin knew him well.

“You okay with tacos?” Gavin kissed Smee one last time and sat him back down on the hardwood.

“Tacos are fine. While you do that, I’m going to take a shower and get ready for bed. After I eat, I’m sleeping for like a year.” Ryan nodded, pulling out a box of taco shells.

“Okay, sweetheart. I’ll be down here if you need me.” Gavin walked over to Ryan and placed a kiss on his cheek, heading upstairs to rid himself of that putrid airplane smell. Once he was clean, he dried himself off and dressed with a pair of boxers, socks, and one of Ryan’s shirts. After brushing his teeth, he let the smell of tacos lead him downstairs, his stomach growling at the promise of an incoming meal. Ryan had the table set, two plates of fresh tacos steaming, and filled to the brim. He was grabbing drinks when he saw Gavin come around the corner.

“There you are. I thought you might have fallen asleep in the shower.”

“I’m surprised I didn’t.” Gavin made his way over to the chair, Ryan rushing to pull it out for him after he had sat down a can of coke for Gavin and diet coke for himself. Gav cracked it open, taking a quick swig as Ryan took his seat next to him. They ate in comfortable silence, Ryan watching Gavin closely as he slowly ate. He could tell that he had a million things he wanted to talk about, but was far too exhausted to even process the words.

“You’re staring, Rye,” Gavin muttered with his mouth full. Ryan smirked.

“And?”

“Reserve it for when I don’t look like utter shite.” Ryan shook his head, reaching over to brush a strand of damp hair away from Gavin’s eyes.

“Nonsense, you look beautiful.”

“You always say that,” he scoffed, taking another sip of his coke as Ryan caressed his cheek.

“Because it’s true… even though you think it’s not.” Gavin leaned into Ryan’s palm, another yawn making itself known.

“I need sleep, now. I’m getting too sappy.”

“But I like sappy Gav.” Ryan fake-whined along with an over-exaggerated pout. Gavin ignored him, standing up and stretching out his already fatigued muscles. Ryan stood up with him, beginning to clean up as Gavin started to make his way upstairs.

“You’re coming up too, right?” Gavin asked, standing on the first step as he called out to Ryan.

“Yeah. I’ll be up in a minute, Dear.” He finished climbing up the stairs and dove into bed, curling into the blankets with a loud groan. Laying down in his own bed had never felt so delightful. He hadn’t even realized he had dozed off until Ryan woke him up when he crawled into bed beside him. After he was settled, Gavin crawled over to him and laid his head on his bare chest, listening to his gentle heartbeat. Ryan wrapped his arms around him, placing several kisses wherever he could reach.

“I love you so much, Rye. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you…”

“You’re right, you are getting too sappy.” Gavin gently slapped at his chest, earning a laugh from Ryan.

“Sod off, you knobhead.” Ryan laughed again, placing yet another kiss atop Gavin’s head. After he fell asleep, Ryan whispered:

“You were my lantern in the darkest night, leading me to a happiness that I never thought I’d feel again. You’re my entire world and I love you, my darling.” A quiet snicker breathed across his chest.

“Now who’s being sappy?”

[nad-zeta]

Match up ^o^

May I request a Match up, please?

I’m at the part when I have to choose a route and I honestly don’t know/care. So I decided why not let some lovely internet stranger choose for me? Who do you think I would pair the best with?

I also noticed how much effort and detail you put into these so I decided that it was only fair to try to put in just as much effort in requesting. Or maybe I am just extremely vain so blabbering on this much about myself comes naturally (I also wouldn’t be too suprised if this were the case lol). Either way, I apologise for this getting so long. And without further ado, let’s learn about yours truly. Uh, yay?

I will start with my physical appearance because that’s easiest.  

First of all, I am rather tall for a woman. Pair that with the fact that I constantly wear boots with 8 centimetre or greater heels and I almost always cap out somewhere above 182 centimetres (that’s 6 feet in American). So yes. I’m not exactly the approachable type, on the account of my height and near constant resting bitch face. I always look pissed off at something (and to be fair, I usually am).

I am a brunette with boring brown eyes. Nothing of note there. 

I prefer to walk on my toes, for whatever reason. I also have great posture when I walk and these two factors always make it seem like I am floating. I’ve been told that I always seem very confident and self-assured. Which is complete bullshit because 90% of the time, I am winging it. 

I am a dancer (of sorts. More on that later), so I am rather slim and toned. This is literally the only aspect of my physicality that I am actually confident in. The rest of me can burn in hell for all I care. 

I am also very touch adverse. I hate the feeling of skin touching my skin it grosses me touch. However. There are a select few people in this world that I accept and enjoy hugs and cuddles from (and who I could snuggle with for hours). If I let anyone cuddle me that means I trust said person unconditionally and feel extremely comfortable around them. It’s essentially the ultimate statement of trust.

Onto personality.

If you can’t already tell, I have about as much dignity as a wet cat. I while I certainly do have an ego, it can be kind of difficult to bruise. Publically, I am absolutely shameless and don’t give two shits about what others think. 

I have a tongue of steel and can rapid fire the most atrocious insults and comebacks when provoked. I’m known for my venomous sarcasm and biting wit among my own circles. I have a line for nearly every single situation so one-liners have become my thing. Which works out for me because I am a huge flirt.

I’ll flirt with pretty much anyone regardless of gender, I don’t give a crap. To clarify, it’s not because I am an attention whore (okay, yes. I am a complete attention whore), it’s because I am a theatre kid so excessive eye contact and sexual jokes are kinda where I thrive. I am also not afraid to get questionably lascivious with my flirting if someone tries to out-pace me. I never blush, I never falter, and I never let anyone know that they got the better of me. It shows weakness. 

Despite my salacious façade, I am not inherently a sexual person. As a matter of fact, I am quite the opposite. I don’t experience sexual attraction (kudos to my asexual humans. I see you). This has rendered me practically immune to all charm, crushes, and sex appeal. It makes my life a lot easier, in my opinion. I don’t get too attached. I also enjoy messing around with the egos of fuck boys. 

As mentioned earlier, I am an attention whore. I love showing off because I crave validation (this could point to some deep seated insecurities about myself that I refuse to acknowledge…. Ahem). Being on stage as where I thrive. And yes, I am a dancer, as I stated earlier. But I am not your conventional prissy ballerina. I am a circus performer. More specifically, I’m an aerialist. I have covered trapeze, contortion (I am unnaturally flexible), lyra, and silks. It’s a lot of fun almost dying every day and finding bruises in the most questionable places (if you cant already tell, I am an adrenaline junkie. I took karate for the first dozen or so years of my life and have recently been searching for more weapons combat classes because apparently I don’t have enough bruises already).

I am not easily impressed. And I don’t give out compliments very often. And that includes myself. I can be unnecessarily hard on myself at times… most of the time. But then again, who isn’t? 

As for the side of me that isn’t stark-raving mad, I am usually a pretty objective person. While I have no qualms with discussing emotions (both mine and friend’s. I am a great listener and actually give pretty good advice when it comes to dealing with intense emotions). I tend to avoid letting them interfere with my logic. I look down on those who allow their emotions to dictate their actions. It makes them needlessly reckless. 

I am typically a pretty chill person. When I am among people I am unfamiliar with, I tend to stay quiet and try not to rock the boat too much (again, I won’t hesitate to unleash a severe tongue lashing upon any poor soul who happens to rub me the wrong way… Or just happens to exist. I don’t take shit from other people and I hate it when others try to control me. (I don’t play rough, I play smart). 

I really enjoy reading, writing, or drawing quietly. I can’t stand loud and excessive noises or people (parties, screaming, concerts). I am a true extroverted introvert. I love being the center of attention and chatting, but I need my alone time. People are exhausting to deal with. 

Because of my aversion to loud sounds, I tend to avoid typical dance parties like the plague. While I am very good with mingling and partying in general, I can only keep it up in short bursts before I have to retreat somewhere quiet. This is also the reason I greatly prefer the nighttime (if I had a choice I would sleep all day and only frolick around at night. I just love the dark. It’s comforting in a weird way). I also love the night because that’s when I get to sleep and just peace out on life. It’s kinda like non-committal dying.

I am near constantly on hyper-alert so I am not easily startled. When I do get startled, I have a tendency to squeak, yelp or growl. These noses are purely reactionary sounds but for whatever reason, my friends think that they are absolutely adorable and will go to great lengths to startle me just to hear me make them.

To counteract my friend’s malevolence, I have learnt to be super observant, especially when I feel threatened. Usually, I am caught up on my own world and thoughts. I have an imagination so powerful that I can trick my brain into feeling false sensations such as an extra limb or falling. I much prefer to spend my time in my head rather than our boring reality. But if I feel threatened, or think that another attack is imminent, I instantly become hyper aware. These moments of lucidity enable me to make certain observations others would otherwise be overlooked (for example. I was able to tell when my professor lost her wedding ring due to the discoloration around her ring finger and the habitual and near-constant worrying she did at it. I offered to help her look after class ^.^. I admittedly felt kinda smug when I saw her surprise.) Ironically enough, I like to refer to this mode of thinking as “Sherlocking”. I can be quite the detective when I really try. 9 out of 10 times my friends will come to me when they suspect infidelity, I am pretty good at digging up dirt. 

However, I have to make the conscious decision to do this, usually when I am trying to figure someone out or manipulate them into liking me. So this isn’t constant and usually I go about my day like everyone else, blissfully unaware of my surroundings.

Uhh, there is probably more I could cover but this is getting very long as-is and you are probably forcing yourself to get through my seemingly eternal ramblings. So I am going to stop here and go grab myself some food. 

Best of luck to you,

-November

Hi there love!<3 you sound like such a cool interesting person! ^_^ Hehehe I probs took so long with this match up that you already chose a new route lol! Anyways thanx for waiting soooooo long for this and I hope ya enjoy it love ^0^ ^_^

I match you with……………………… Masamune

Honestly, it was between Masamune and Mitsuhide for me lol but i eventually decided to go with Masamune 

The first time Masamune sees you, his eyes go wide in awe, like wow you are one tall fine lady! He has legit never met anyone so tall. After you were named as chatelaine, you stayed behind with some of the warlords to chat and get to know them better, you are after all going to be seeing their faces every day for the next 3 months. 

Right of the bat, Masamune is howling in laughter at the fact that you are way taller than Ieyasu. You, Masamune and Mitsuhide basically tease the poor porcupine for a solid 20 minutes. “My my I never expected such a scary-looking little mouse to be so bubbly and friendly.” 

Oooh, this boy just stared a war of wits. Today day was a good day cause your tongue of steel was rapidly firing witty words and sarcastic remarks at the resident kitsune. He almost couldn’t keep up, almost. Masamune was just standing there watching the whole scene unfold, you truly were going to be a lot of fun! Masamune decided to test out that tongue of steel of your and started firing some flirty pick-up line, while unbeknown to him you are the queen of one-liners, and have no shame when it comes lascivious flirting. Masamune, of course, never backs down from a challenge, and he was determined to make you blush. The conversation got so heated that it made even Hideyoshi blush on your behalf. You simply laughed and fired another one of your pick-up lines.

After the little chat in the hallway and a massive speech from mama bear for talking about things that were not PG13, cause of the kids *cough* Mitsunari *cough*, you and Masamune become quick friends. He had never met a woman before that was immune to his boyish wild charm, and handsome sexual appeal. Masamune was definitely popular with the woman, not as popular as Hideyoshi, but he was definitely a fuckboi. As surprised as he was, that his normal antics didn't work on you, his ego wasn’t dented one bit, it just made him more determined to get to know you. 

Masamune definitely finds your flirtatious nature attractive, especially when you managed to score the two of you free sweet bun just by flirting with the shop owner, he was, even more, shook when the shop owner was a woman, your flirtation truly knows no bounds. The two of you would spend loads of time together, just going out for tea and sweets while getting to know each other. TBH although Masamune would never admit it, he found it refreshing that you weren't just his friend simply cause he was hot or cause you wanted to climb in stations but because you actually liked him as a person. You and Masamune definitely made an unstoppable team when it came to banquets. The two of you would team up and start teasing everyone there. When you two cuties are together its always a good time with loads of laughter and banter

Masamune discovered that you like him, was an adrenaline junkie. He loved that he finally had someone around that would do stupid shit with him just for the thrill of it. The two of you would go out on adventures 24/7 jumping down waterfalls and hiking up cliffs. The two of you goofball would also dare each other to do the craziest shit. Like one-time Masamune dared you to jump off the castle’s roof onto your balcony, and you freaken did it, no questions asked. Or like the one time you dared him to put his head in Shogetsu mouth, mind you the little cub was now grown into a full-blown tiger

One day you and Masa went to go watch one of Mitsuhide’s undercover performances. The three of you were investigating a shady daimyo in one of the nearby provinces. The three of you disguised yourselves as performers and joined a circus troop as their new dancers. You were so excited, the stage is where you truly come alive. You had promised Masa to show him something that would shock/surprise him after he gave you the grand tour of  Azuchi. Today was the day, you had kept your dance and performances a secret from the two men, and now it was finally time to show them what you can do. You had 3 different performances planned. The first one was contortion. To say Masamune was shook would be an understatement he never knew anyone could be so freaken flexible, like wow. Your next performance was aerial dancing, his blue eye gleamed in delight, watching you move through the air so gracefully. If he wasn’t sure before he was sure now, this boy loved ya. But what really took his breath away was when you trapezed through the air, he was absolutely mesmerized at the way you flew through the air doing back-flips and other cool ass tricks. Masamune loved the look of pure joy on your face as you performed and after the show, you explained to him that you were a theatre kid back in the past. Mitsuhide definitely took note of your skills, and since that day you now accompanied him on most missions that required him to disguise himself as a performer.

Masamune loved everything about you at this point. Your overdramatic introvert/extrovert personality. The way you walked. Gosh, he loved the way you walked, it looked like you were an angel floating around wherever you went. He loved your banter and one-liner for every situation. And most of all he loved your hyper-alert side. Boy did he love to come up behind you to scare the crap outta you just so he could hear you squeak, yelp or growl. Like he lived for those adorably cute noises. And you somewhere along the line had fallen in love with the big idiot. He was always coming up with new fun adventures to go on or new fun things to do. He was one of those few people that could actually keep up with your banter

What was he most impressed with you may ask, well you Sherlocking skills of course. One day there were rumours of some super shady daimyos visiting Azuchi. Word on the street was that they were planning on stealing Mitsunari report to make the poor angel look bad. Mitsuhide was away sorting out some other plots and schemes, so it was now up to you to use your skills, to save the angel. You used your detective skill to gather evidence, and since your inner circle knew you were from the future, you were planning on catching them in the act and filming them for evidence. Masamune was always up for an adventure, so he acted as you own personal Watson. The two of you hid while watching the whole scene unfold, once they left the room the two of you came out. “What do you think they are going to do with the report lass,” he asked while his blue eye gleamed in delight. “Hmmmmm, I believe they are going to burn the evidence in the forest” you replied in your best British accent. Masamune couldn’t help but laugh. The two of you made your way to a secluded part of the forest and spotted them making a fire. Masamune looked at you curiously “How did you know they were going to be in this exact spot.” “Elementary, my dear Masamune.” He couldn’t help but burst out in laughter you really were a super fun kitten. Unfortunately for the two of you, they heard you guys laughing behind the trees and before you knew it, the two of you were surrounded. One of the men had a sword right at your throat ready to cut you open, that is when you shocked them by not backing down from the fight, you hit the sword away with one of your own gifted to you by your dearest one-eyed dragon. “ Point that sword at me one more time and i’ll slash your Achilles’ tendons, and TBH given the medicine situation of this time, no one would know how to fix your injury, so I hope you like hobbling around on one leg for the rest of your life cause that is what will happen.” These men were shook; meanwhile, Masa was next to you howling in laughter, “She’s not joking boys, this lass delivers on her threats.” You had never seen grown men run away from a fight so fast. You and Masamune picked up Mitsunari’s report that had fallen on the ground during the commotion and walked back hand in hand

You didn’t really like skin touching skin, but TBH you definitely like the warm feeling of Masamune’s hand warmed around yours. The two of you had come to fall in love with each other, and it wasn’t long before you two cuties entered into a relationship. Despite both of you being adrenaline junkies, both of you also loved your quiet times. Often you would sit together in his manor each doing your own thing. You would read and write, and Masamune would sit at his desk pretending to work (Cause admin is so freaken boring). 

The two of you would have the best time together during banquets you loved being the centre of attention and would chat with everyone, but as the night would progress you would start feeling a bit drained and that’s when the one-eyed dragon would swoop in, pick you up and takes you to a quiet corner where the two of you cuddle and snuggle together.

He would spoil you rotten with the most amazing food, he would basically, cook anything your heart desires just to see that beautiful smile on your face. His heart would always burst with affection whenever he cuddles and kiss you, he knew that the fact that you allowed him to cuddle you was the ultimate statement of trust between the two of you.

Often the two of you cuties can be found causing mischief and giving Mamayoshi more grey hairs or cuddled together sharing stories of your day

Other potential matches............... Mitsuhide 

Hope u enjoyed it dear @november-solarstorms

[thatyanderecritic]

been reading a lot of yandere stuff and it feels like the targets of the yanderes' love are not allowed to feel anything besides fear or all-purpose kindness (or arousal in the dubcon/noncon works). ex: they can't feel frustrated enough at their situation to vent (without the yandere/world deciding to "punish" them violently for it). its pretty frustrating... yeah twisted love is cool, but why does it seem like a lot of yandere works lack the romance and are just rape/torture porn fantasies?

And I OOP.... You just spilled all the tea on this message box anon. 

Anyways, Kai here to answer to the call of rants! Cause this pathetic sack of flesh (That’s me, Kai!) just loves to bitch and moan about yandere stories :) So let’s ponder why this is the case...

All the blame falls onto the author. I mean, they’re the only person who’s writing these stories after all. It’s not like these characters are real, ya know? But why is it that authors just like to copy one another? Well, I have a bunch of theories but none of them particularly nice. But they’re the hard truths.

1. Authors who write yandere stories are simply unimaginative and they just copy their predecessors.

While writing is a passion, I know there’s a grind in wanting views and increasing in popularity. I can’t tell you the type of schemes Julie and I came up with to make this blog more popular on tumblr since the demographics here seem to want the yandere aesthetics or the dramatics. Sometimes, authors just like to chase those clicks and views. So the appeal to the majority and what is a safe to write is normally the go to. Since they see that other people who write ‘X’ about yanderes get to cum money, they don’t really have the incentive to think outside the box or explore an avenue they were interested in because other people might not want to explore that avenue with them.

Or they aren’t schemers (like Julie and I lol) and are simply that unimaginative. They see something they’re predecessors wrote and go, “I like that” then just copy it thinking they’re doing something original simply because they’re the one writing it now. Let me say this now before anyone mistaken me: there’s nothing wrong in writing an overdone trope or following a path of your favorite author/story. Tropes are fun and if you like a certain thing, that’s cool. There’s a reason why the liberal arts study previous works compared to, say... the sciences. You wouldn’t study a medieval medicine practice since it’s outdated. But you would study the Scarlet Letter to widen your horizon and develop your craft. And that’s the important key: “wide your horizon and develop your craft”. The problem with most writers is that they see a book and consider it the word of god. It is terrifying when I hear people say something like “I’m trying to copy Stephan King’s writing style”. Fucking yikes my dude! Besides the fact that Stephan King is generally a bad writer, you shouldn’t mimic a teacher but become your own person. Take a technique or two you like and blend it to your style. Don’t become a chameleon (unless you are going to parody/satire said author). If you’re going to do a trope, I say consider two things: 1) Are you planning to do anything with the trope? Are you going to push it forward or explore a facet that you don’t think others explored? and 2) If you don’t plan to push it forward and just do a gratuities writing of the trope, are you willing to accept that fact? Are you going to accept it and not cover your ass when someone comes around to point out  that it’s a copycat of another story (Ex. The Hunger Games Series and the Divergent Series)? Are you willing to stand up and say “Fuck yeah I was inspired by them and made my own version because I love the trope.” If you’re will to answer these two points confidently, then go for it. Cause the worst thing you can do with a trope is A) Not do anything with it and B) Lie to yourself that you’re doing something new.

This suddenly reminded me when I saw one of these writing blogs complaining about getting copy and paste writing requests. They were complaining about wanting to be original and not wanting to be a commodity. Well... first of all, if they don’t want to be a commodity then stop writing people’s requests, the fuck lol. Next it’s laughable that they think their original. Let’s ignore the fact of the complete irony that they think they’re writing something original when what they’re writing is a plot given to them by a stranger and also that they’re a fandom writer (oops, spilled the tea again). There’s really nothing “original” anymore since we can point out a specific trope and trace it back to an ancient text that done the exact same thing. What is “original” is the blending of tropes, the reactions of tropes, and the element that authors put in their writing to give it life. Cause at the end of the day, if you entertained an audience, then you won.   

2. Authors who write yandere stories secretly hate yanderes.

Okay, so this is a theory that Julie came up with and I probably won’t have a lot to write on it compared to the first point. Anyways, the theory is that some of these authors who write yandere stories just hate yanderes. I mean, look at half the shit that are yandere stories. Straight up torture, clickbait yanderes, and scumbags. This is what people imagined a yandere would be. You can at least tell the difference between someone who liked yanderes or hate them. For example, when yandere’s has a “gentle moment”. If it’s genuinely sweet and soft, then that person probably likes yanderes. If not, then that person probably doesn’t and can’t get their head out of “I hate yanderes” mode. We can also look to the first point about scheming and getting them views for tossing in a yandere. Just like the otome game community, even if the product is shit, we’ll still eat it up because it’s a product for a community that doesn’t get a lot of products of their bias. 

3. Authors who write yandere stories are simply bad at writing romance.

Again, probably not a lot to write on this point since I spent it all on the first point. Anyways, as this point state, sometimes authors are simply bad at writing romance or not interested in romance. It just happens, you know? An author will bite off more than they can chew and end up making a mediocre story. And that, combined with point one and maybe point two, then of course no one can make an actually good yandere romance story since they can’t get out of their head of “Romancing a scumbag”. Also, sometimes people read a story thinking it’s a romance story when really, it isn’t. It happens and we can’t fault the author too much since they either need more practice or it’s our fault for assuming it’s a romance to begin with. Also, can I complain about all these people who tag some stories as a romance when it’s clearly not? Now they’re the real villains here. 

4. Specific authors who write yandere stories have a fetish for rape/torture porn.

Okay okay. I get it, some people got their fetishes and coping mechanisms. Put down your pitch forks. What I’m annoyed about are people who don’t acknowledge their fetish or at least state it at the beginning of their stories. Come on, don’t be those tagging jackasses who incorrectly tag their shit. Not everyone likes your fetish. You stay in your clearly defined lane and I stay in my clearly defined lane. Cool? Cool. Well, on this website. People are pretty good at their tagging and warnings. The problem are the jackasses outside of this hell site. If tumblr is hell, the rest of the internet is the void.

Well, tbh, this point isn’t too bad. People do what people do and I can’t complain too much. And hey! I would rather read these rape/torture porn stories versus the copy cat stories. At least we get porn and the possible reward of being able to jack off to it. It’s just that nine times out of ten, the “yandere” isn’t a yandere. What a surprise. 

Anyways, I hope writing this post help vent out your frustrations anon. 

Julie: Just edited Kai’s rant here. She’s really spilling all the tea 🍵.

[oceangotsims]

A Delightful Little Tour!

Hey! It's been a minute! Welcome back into my head. Lemme show you around my place!

Anyway here's my better than shit apartment! Come on in let me give yall a tour! Take yall shoes off at the door tho I still have SOME morals.

And don't clock me for wearing shoes in my own bed because it's MY BED!! Anyways here's my cute ass dirty ass kitchen and front door! I made those skateboards by hand ya know. I barely use the stove because pizza and the food court downstairs is superior!

Heres my little living/TV room. Most of the insurance money went on that bad boy sitting on that table over there. I'm kinda proud of it. I cant pay for cable or internet or much else but at least I have a big ass TV and can steal all that other crap form the neighbors.

There's my computer where I write all my songs at and look at kitten videos for a couple hours before switching to po- I mean wholesome family youtube channels! Yeah... yeah... anyway it's a good time. Had this ole thing for years now and its still trucking along.

And there's the notebook you're reading right now! It's a thiccy ain't it? One day you might write in that same book. Mmmmhmm yes indeedy. Don't spill nothing on these pages tho. It might've only cost $20 but I had to do a whole lot of haggling for it!

This is the bomb-ass view I get from my apartment! I'm too broke to go out places so I like to put my head against the glass and imagine myself amongst the big shots. Well actually I kind of project myself there.... my brains weird. You'll see. Issa mess.

And THIS is my throne. Where I spend at least 2 hours on average a day. Sittin on the terlet. Letting my body free itself. Scrolling through Switter and Simstagram. Stalking my ex's. Ya know, normal ppl things. I like to sing in the shower and belt off "THIS BOY IS A BOTTOMMMMMM" at 3 am. My neighbors don't like it much but that's prolly cuz they feel called out. I understand how yall feel bottoms... I understand. And its gonna be okay!

And that's my place! These dang strangers came up in here the other day but that's another story in like 10 minutes because I've hit the image cap. Until next time!