#anyways and if he dies early and his kid is too young but he's also not married and has no siblings then idk who would be regent

[llycaons]

see whats interesting is my mom is VERY supportive of my sibling's pronoun changes but she won't let my youngest brother grow out his hair or pierce his ears, which he maintains is entirely for non-gender reasons. but the reason she won't allow him to do that is still her sense of gender confirmity bc EYE had pierced ears at that age and she didn't let me cut my hair until I was like in college. anyway he really seems to identify with the emo subculture

[sesamenom]

trying to figure out Lomion's relationships for the reverse gondolin au - so far I have Rog as his mentor instead of Eol and Celegorm as his "uncle". he's not particularly close with Idril, but Turgon helps him with the politics/statecraft stuff. anyways I can't figure out a marriage candidate for him for heir-identification purposes so

[sarahreesbrennan]

Another Interesting Spoilery Evil Question

To directly answer the question before I start rambling, the Cobra’s body’s physical age is 24.

(You can stop reading here if you like. This gets very long!)

When Marius meets the Cobra (chapter 18 epigraph from Time of Iron) he correctly identifies him as Marius’s own age at the time - 18.

At the time of the book all the physical bodies’ ages are as follows.

Marius - 24

The Cobra - 24

Rahela - 24

Octavian - 24

(Pio and Nemeth, Octavian’s advisers, are in their early 40s and late 50s respectively - they’re Octavian’s dad’s people and that is part of why they are so stressed. Their king died young, Octavian became king in his teens and it has been an uneasy court ever since.)

Emer - 23

Key - 20

Lia - 19

Rae and Eric in our world were both 4 years younger than their bodies in this world (so they would both be 20 if the story hadn’t happened to them). For the moment we’ll leave aside Key, who had another life too, in a different way. (He was a little kid, but old enough to walk after his father, in the epigraph from Time of Iron in chapter 15.)

I do age shenanigans for two reasons.

—One is that age in fiction and reality is weird, and I wanted to portray that. If I had a crush on Mr Darcy when I was 7, is that okay? If I had a crush on Mr Darcy when aged 41, is that okay? Mr Darcy’s always in his late twenties: Elizabeth Bennet will never be older than 21, but she seemed so glamorous and all-knowing to me when I was a kid.

And if you walk into a story, when in their character development do you find them? Would we like Darcy when he’s sneering at Elizabeth at a ball? Who is it that we love and when?

Plenty of adult women fancied Edward Cullen, perpetually a teen (or was he? Fantasy and horror also open up the possibility of immortality - but in a way, all fictional characters are immortal. Holden Caulfield isn’t growing up any more than Edward Cullen is. And like fictional characters and immortals, the dead aren’t getting any older either—I think often of Anne Rice, author of the Vampire Chronicles, who wrote the doomed child vampire Claudia after losing her own daughter Michele as a child. Death, immortality, fiction and the overlap!) When I read or watched stories in which characters were in different/changed bodies they usually seemed younger - often their younger selves, or a younger/cuter body (Peggy Sue Got Married, Scarlet Heart). (Exceptions exist of course, e.g. Howl’s Moving Castle.) And I like magic losing something, costing you something, plus I’m a contrarian. So I wanted them older.

—The other is that LONG LIVE EVIL is a story about trauma, which often arrests your age in your mind. The period in which you were enduring the horrors is a blank in which you couldn’t develop normally, or in which you had plenty of experiences but few of them match with your peers’.

Cancer did it to me, which wasn’t horrendous as I was in my early 30s and that’s still adult, just meant a bit of ‘oh no I’m not this child’s mother, I’m too young - actually I’m a bit old to be this child’s mother now I think about it, but anyway I don’t claim her’ and the like. But I’ve seen it do the same for people with cancer I befriended or whom I mentor, and it’s a very different proposition if the lost years are 17-21.

It’s not just cancer, I’ve seen bereavement work that way on people, and apparently celebrity works on the mind like trauma and arrests you at the age you became famous in a lot of ways. It’s being taken out of the run of ordinary life, walking through your portal into strangeness.

But in the end most of us wind up with years that feel lost, I think, and playing catch-up is the only way forward.

And allegory remains allegory: if I’m writing a werewolf I’m taking about rage and body horror, sure, but I’m also talking about werewolves.

I was actually confused by this ask at first as I’d written a whole section where Eric says he’s going to die of a heart attack at 20 and Marius is exasperated as Eric is a little young to start lying about his age! But it must have fallen victim to my many cuts - stories transform! - and I can see why, because I don’t think Eric exactly thinks of himself as 20 anymore.

I had some struggles with the age stuff, it’s another layer of complication in a complicated story and there were worries raised that it was unnecessary and might make some characters less appealing but in the end I decided it was necessary to me and let the characters be unappealing, then.

I also enjoy the twisting, fluid ages because they cause conflict, and conflict is story.

Rae uses her new age (and thus doesn’t need to think of her absolutely horrible self worth) to count herself out as a romantic option in Key’s eyes.

She also thinks of the Emperor as in his mid-20s, as he is - after a time skip that happens in the original Time of Iron, years in which Key and Emer were Lia’s servants. She knows about those years, but she doesn’t put it together.

At Eric and Marius’s first meeting 6 years before the events of LONG LIVE EVIL, Eric also hasn’t been in the book that long. He was in a horrifically traumatic survival situation for a large part of the time he was inside, when he approached Marius to blackmail him. That is objectively a deranged thing to do, but Eric is thinking like a terrified 14 year old and also like a Huge Fan of Marius. aka the quintessential white knight, the Last Hope who is reserved and dignified and crucially, 24-28.

That would be the Marius Eric at the time knows when he approaches Marius in the flesh, Marius at 18 and coming off family trauma, friend trauma and quasi-romantic trauma himself. Marius actually DOES go into dissociative states and kill people, Eric was taking a huge risk with his own life that not a single person in the country would have taken. Marius is a Valerius, and they are killers. (The whole court, Marius included, thought Lady Katalin ((Rahela’s mother)) was being very daring by like, touching Marius’s hand when he was 17.)

Eric is acting wild partly because a) he is wild, b) he’s desperate but also crucially c) he’s thinking of Marius as someone that Marius isn’t yet and d) he’s not thinking of things from Marius’s POV, and doesn’t until the events of LONG LIVE EVIL. Their quasi friendship/quasi hostage situation (that the hostage had firmly decided was happening) couldn’t have happened without a perfect storm of weirdness, risks and lack of understanding what the hell was going on.

Marius would not have seen a 14 year old Eric (not a child to him exactly, but squire age rather than knight age) as a criminal threat in the same way as he saw the Cobra, his own age (18, which was definitely very adult, Marius thought at the time). Eric wouldn’t have failed to consider consequences or failed to consider Marius as person rather than character, if he’d actually been 18. But by the time anyone knew better, a status quo was established, and habit is second nature and a stronger nature than the first.

Eric’s plight is horrific initially. But at the same time, Eric is extremely intelligent (both intellectually and emotionally) and able to both cover and play catch-up to this new life, and he can advise Rae with the benefit of his experience - but that doesn’t mean that he didn’t screw up massively when he first came into the book, or that he doesn’t still have many things to work through.

Similarly, Emer is used to Rahela who is quasi older sister and quasi mistress, while Rae is now acting younger. And all of them are dealing with a gross system in which men are seen as in their youthful prime when women the same age are getting long in the tooth and can be traded in for teenagers - so even two people who are the same age aren’t treated as if they’re the same age, if they’re different genders. Age stuff is crunchy!

Also, while Emer thinks of Lia as having all the power due to class, Lia looks on someone who was her glamorous older stepsister’s age mate and went off to the big city years ago rather differently. But then, are adulthood and childhood different worlds? Is being in different social classes being in different worlds?

Can we reach the different universes of other people is something I’m always asking, I think.

THIS IS SO LONG. I AM SO SORRY.

[desparaic]

Imagine Rengoku's son traveling to the past pt.2

Rengoku X Fem! Reader

Also in the future, there’s a long pause after red light arc. Hence tengen already retired in Future Son’s timeline. and [spoiler alert] yes we will absolutely ignore the mark curse

read part 1 here.

“Oh, what breathing technique do you use?”

You ask your…. son? kid? dang you never thought you would be able to say that to a teenager this early in your life, especially when you’re not long into the marriage

“Flame breathing!” He says with a proud grin (why this kid so cute you wanna coddle him to death)

“Following your father’s footstep, I see! Did he teach you personally?” You smile, thinking about your husband teaching your son swordsmanship. Ugh the thought of it makes your heart melt.

“Nope. From Grandfather!”

h

huh?

tafa???

Grandfather??? Like Rengoku’s father??? Your father in law???? The man who can’t even get up and do something else other than drinking and yelling at other people?????

He taught your son flame breathing?????

You are confusion

You ask why didn’t his father teach him instead

“… Anyway! Do you want to spar?”

This kid—

okay, well, clearly he doesn’t want to talk about it. Maybe he’s on bad terms with his father???

But you can’t imagine Kyojuro being a bad father or someone who has a tense relationship with his kids. The last thing he wants to be is to be like his father. You know that. He himself told you that before.

So maybe he’s just in the middle of an argument with his father??? Like… a really long one…

yeah that could be it

So you decide to spar with him (you don’t have anything else to do anyway other than walking around the nearby village)

you kick his butt

It feels refreshing and fun. not because you’re beating your future child.

You never have this feeling sparring with anyone before. It’s cute. You’re experiencing a mother-son time except…. you ain’t a mother yet… but you are— will??? idk

In the middle of sparring (how many rounds has it been??), Kyojuro appears with a big grin, before it fades and he tilts his head confusedly.

“MY LOVE! WHO IS THIS PERSON??”

Hooo boy

Both of you whip your head to see him

“HE LOOKS JUST LIKE ME! HAHAHA!”

Bless your husband, he isn’t even phased that there’s a rando lookin like he’s his clone

BUT YOU HECKAAA EXCITED, about to tell Kyojuro that he’s—

You see your (future) son’s conflicted face contorted to anger, then calm. “Ah. I’ll take my leave right now. I’m thirsty.”

He leaves just like that.

You’re confused

has future you ever taught him manners

Is… Was the argument that bad????

Poor Kyojuro is so confused, looking at the boy leaving.

“Who was that young fellow?”

You explain that that’s his son

His face shows a split second of surprise before it immediately switches to excitement

(he doesn’t even ask how that’s possible like ok)

“HE’S MY SON??? OH WHAT JOY! S/O. THAT IS OUR SON!”

Yes, yes you just told him that of course you know lol

But you’re so confused as to why your son would just leave like that. You honestly expect him to be just as excited to see his dad like he did with you

and so

the chaos and conflicts and confusion and everything related ensues

Practically everyone knows your future son is here

They’re dying to meet him

Uzui is proud of what he has become. Man’s flamboyant. can even take a hard pat on his back! (he nearly died)

Mitsuri is so excited!!! She keeps giving him sakura mochi and all other snacks and talks to him a lot!!! Sees him as her lil bro ngl (tho technically it should be nephew)

Shinobu too is very sweet towards him and tells him he’s welcome anytime to the Butterfly Estate to just have tea and chat (every time they interact your son’s face turns tomato red. does he have a school boy crush????)

Tomioka is just happy the boy talks to him often

its cute. you can tell he admires the water hashira a lot

Sanemi scoffs and thinks he still has a long way until he is strong

like who tf think does this kid think he is

but he supposes the kid has potential

Obanai acknowledges him and greets him even though he scares your son sometimes

Gyomei. Cats. lots of pats. lots of fluff. nuff said

Muichiro always forgets his name

Tanjiro is super shocked but is happy to get along with Rengoku’s future son!! Nezuko takes a liking to him immediately and warms up to him (Zenitsu seething rn)

surprisingly inosuke oddly silent around him at first…. before he inevitably challenges him to a fight

The son ofc know who they all are (he still does not like young Zenitsu)

Also, he nearly spilled Tanjiro and Kanao’s future relationship oops ig at the present they aint tgt yet 🤷‍♂️

They all think he’s great!

But… there is one thing for sure

And what confuses them the most

is that he absolutely hates the mention of his father

Whenever someone brings up the fact he looks just like Rengoku or they compare the father and son, boy gets real upset and angry

Like??? huh???

You’d thinking a kid would be proud to have someone like Rengoku as their father

Apparently not

Kyojuro catches on to this.

I mean, its hard not to tell that every time he approaches the boy, he just pretends the hashira never exist

Kyojuro kinda concerned and worried

And frankly, he’s kinda sad too.

He wants to spend his time with his future son before who knows when he’ll return back to his time!

Eventually, Rengoku catches him a place where the kid can’t escape easily

He asks the kid what is wrong and what is really going on

Dang… it really hurt seeing your own kid (even though technically not yet) glaring at you like that

The kid only grumbles excuses and that’s it

Kyojuro gently tries to push him to open up

Really wants to know what’s going on poor man please give him a break

“I can tell you don’t like to converse with me… why is that? I would love to get to know my own son!”

Rengoku Kyojuro would never expect that sentence would completely make his own future kid snap.

“Son??? Hah. Sure.”

???????????

The??? Audacity???

My man Kyojuro isn’t even phased (again, bless his patient heart) he’s just confused

What does that mean?

“Did… I do something…?”

“Something???? Something…?????” the boy clenched his jaw, “Don’t act like you care.”

… But he does tho.

At this point the flame hashira just wants to know what he did wrong to make him so mad

“Oh, you really wanna know what you did?” He says in such a bitter tone. Whatever Kyojuro did, he musta pissed him reeaaal off.

“Y…Yes…?”

“… Fine. Not like it’ll change anyway considering how easily you threw us away.”

p-

pardon?

“You hurt Mother. You left her when she needed you the most. You left us! Because you think your job is better than this little family!”

….huh?

“I’m… I’m sorry, I don’t und-“

“When she needed you the most, you just up and left her! Just like that! What do you think I’ll feel about that, huh?”

Kyojuro… did that? He can’t even fathom leaving you for a split second! What was future him thinking?

“You left Mother! When I was still… When she was still pregnant and needed you… You chose to go on a mission instead of being there for her!”

“Do you know how much my mother begged you not to go? How she endlessly express her worries and concerns, even though she never doubted you before??”

“Do you know how much it hurt her when you promised her nothing will happen, only for some crow to announce that you died in a fight with an Upper Moon, a fight you could’ve avoided! A FIGHT THAT YOU SO SELFISHLY WENT ON AND JUST DIED?!”

…

Hold on…

Hang on—

What?

—————————

I was supposed to finish this all in one post, but I reached the limit… Gonna post part 3 soon

[2demondogs]

Can you do Arthur and BioKid!reader (prob age around 5-7) where Arthur sent his kid to school (around 1870, school began to become free) because even if he knows he could teach his kid the basics, he wants better for them.

As we know, schools back then did physical punishments. If a kid lacked behind their fellow students, teachers often saw it as laziness and would punish the kid.

Arthurs kid, who was very excited to attend school, came back from it sobbing their eyes out because they were canned (hit) on their hands for not understanding math and begging that Arthur doesn't send them back.

Obv Arthur, being an amazing dad, doesn't send them back and taught them stuff himself.

Weirdly enough I had a very similar experience at that age but in ballet class. Are any of us okay?

Historical accuracy was attempted. Though the image of being dropped off at school on a horse is absolutely hilarious to me. "Okay little buddy here's a cigarette for lunch, I'll clip clop back at 4. Daddy's gonna go rob a bank now. Hyah!!"

Arthur's a cigarette mom tbh. Also this took literally like 2 months for me to get to I'm so sorry LOL I wanted some familial comfort so I was finally in the headspace for it.

Words: 3k Tags: AU - canon divergence, pre-canon (circa 1888), hurt/comfort, it takes a village so the gang's all here too, angst but also a lotta fluff Arthur is just being Arthur (aka a killjoy), gender-neutral reader

Few things in his life have brought Arthur as much pride — in someone else, in himself — as the grin plastered on your face the first day of school.

Boadicea disliked the amount of people, the small kids that tried to stroke her legs before being beckoned away by their parents. Most were used to animals like her, but he could tell the city-bred ones from his own kind: brighter faces, slower walks, cleaner nails. It's the same as their parents, dressed well and sometimes in automobiles.

What an odd gathering these schoolrooms make for. He's always thought it'd be funny to have punted John in the direction of one, but he finds he's had a wrong idea about the crowd. Wouldn't have been as satisfying as he imagined when the man was just a boy, wily and jaded and just like all the other farm kids that he saw trudge in and out yesterday. (Of course, when John showed curiosity about it and asked him what the crowd was like, he told him he was far too stupid to dream of going to school. He is a father, but he ain't John's.)

In another life, he might even stick around to converse with the other parents. He'd pondered it that first day, feeding Boadicea an apple for the trip from camp some miles off and to this building on the edge of town. Arthur wondered if he had had you ten years later, and if he were not so much younger than all these parents, and if you were not so—

Well, misplaced in the world. His own fault. He thinks of it everyday.

He studies the bricks while he smokes and waits at the side of the building, now, early as he was yesterday lest he miss something important. What it would be, he doesn't know. Perhaps he just hopes you'll be given back to him sooner today, because he's coming to realize he's grown fond of knowing exactly where you are. After your mother died, the clinginess is a little more souring than he'd like to feel, so he doesn't study it.

Instead, he flicks ash off his cigarette and considers that it's going to get chilly soon. You've grown since last winter, and he ought to make sure you still fit your coat when he brings you home.

He doubts Grimshaw will mind making you another; seems to like you. Pities you, anyways, because your father is the young, dumb oaf Arthur Morgan. That woman drives him insane, sometimes, but he has learned that she cares in her own way ever since you came along. A certain softness came out in her that, rarely but truly, extended to him, too.

The cigarette is replaced by another by the time the kids begin to pour out of the doors. Youngest first, so there's no wait to see you searching for him.

Already, Arthur knows something is wrong. There's no difference from your usual face, besides whatever calm comes over it when you lay eyes on him— but that calm looks more like an ache for comfort that concerns him, even though he can't tell what, precisely, tips him off. He supposes it's the same thing that changed him to the point of considering your winter clothes, whatever thing makes him a father instead of a simple man.

The ground is tough and sandy below his knee when he drops to one to meet your eyes, brows raised in expectance of some explanation. Even your gait is quicker, your hug tighter; you aren't talking like you were yesterday, let alone grinning, and Arthur pinches his cigarette in his teeth to smooth a hand over your head and back.

That smile had made you seem so grown-up, but now you look so young and small. He takes the smoke from his lips and holds the hand to the side to keep it from your face.

"How's your day, buddy?" He asks, anyways, and frowns when you shrink in his arms and press closer. Peeling away to take a look at you, Arthur runs a hand over the side of your head to brush away your hair. He doesn't see any bruises or scrapes, but still asks: "Y'get in a fight or somethin'?"

You shake your head. His hand is large where it lays on your shoulder, firm and comforting. It only takes a moment for you to give up the silence and struggle to explain.

"She called me lazy," you say.

Arthur's brows furrow. "Teacher, you mean?"

You nod, speaking as if it's difficult not to burst into a shout. Around you, the older kids begin to pour out, but he is only focused on your voice. "She smacked me with a ruler."

"What?" He interrupts.

It comes out harsher than he means it to, and he strokes a hand over your head when you flinch. Jesus, you're on edge if you're flinching at him. Anger broils hot and instant in his gut; he knows very well how most people raise their kids and he had talked long and hard with Grimshaw for yanking on your ear one too many times but regardless, it isn't anyone's place to lay a hand on you. It isn't even his — he isn't Lyle, and you're considerably more of an angel than he ever has been himself — but it certainly isn't anyone else's.

"Where?" His eyes pass over you, searching.

Looking over the handsewn clothes Grimshaw had done-up for you, adorned with those gaudy little buttons Dutch had popped off of some nice suit jackets during a gathering he'd infiltrated some months ago, Arthur feels even more anger. Six years of raising you and dressing you in love.

It certainly is not her right to smack his child. Our child, he thinks, and the fondness only feeds the disgust. Suddenly, he wonders what you didn't tell him the first day, and if some of those wailing kids were sad for more than simply missing mother dearest.

You hold out your hands, backs up. A few knuckles are swollen, and you wince when he traces a fingertip over them to test how badly.

He bites back a sigh. He feels like he should've known this would happen, although not a single one of them has been inside a schoolhouse. Maybe Grimshaw, seems the type, but she never spoke of it. Still, Arthur thinks he should've known it the same way he knows you'll grow out of your coat this winter.

Isn't it what fathers do? Know things? Lyle hadn't been much of a father, but he always knew things.

Is Arthur worse off than him?

"Why'd she do this?" He asks.

Your face is growing redder and redder, flushed with embarrassment and shame. He wishes he had the words to soothe that, but he knows a scolding like this always leaves a certain rawness in a child. He'd had plenty of them himself.

"I was bein'... in— inatten..." The frustration of not being able to remember and repeat the word wells tears in your eyes, but Arthur's heard enough.

"Hey, it's a'right," he hushes, shaking his head. Takes a quick drag and blows it to the side. "Let's get'chu home, okay?"

You ignore him, trying to explain: "I was bad at math."

"Shit, I ain't no good with numbers, neither," Arthur says, and then catches himself. "Don't say shit. Okay?" You nod. A small flicker of your lips into a smile makes him feel better, though you still look like a kicked puppy and it makes his heart ache. "Let's get'chu home," he repeats, and this time you listen.

He's never seen Hosea so displeased.

That's untrue; he has, over gunshots and blood-puddles. It feels like a gunshot to see you burst into tears, curled into the man's chest after Arthur tried to encourage you to talk to him about what happened. He had always been better with words, but he remembers while watching him handle your sobbing that Hosea has always been better with comfort, too.

Hardly had the man picked you off your spot hugged to Arthur's front atop Boadicea — did so yesterday too, and if today was just as happy then Arthur would've been glad to see it turn into a habit — before you broke into tears once more. He had quieted you eventually on the ride with the promise of not returning, although he intended to talk it over with the others before he decided once and for all.

Our kid, he thinks warmly, and then: I feel like a kid myself. Some things come naturally when you have a child, he's finding, but so much of it just doesn't.

"Teacher smacked 'em with a ruler. Poor thing's knuckles are all..." Arthur explains, sighing heavily, waving with a hand in the air as if to say: fucked up. Hosea will jump off that crate he's sat on and smack him if he talks that foul in front of you. At least I'm grown enough to take a flick to the nose, he thinks bitterly. "Doesn't wanna go back, now."

Hosea seems to struggle through the same thoughts as he did, prying your hand off his chest to take a look. It's normal for others, though not for them. Not with you, at least. He can almost see the memories of similar punishments in his eyes. Still, Hosea pats your back and picks you off himself to hold your face.

"You think your Daddy knows everything you need to know, anyways, do you?" He asks.

It's a tease, mostly, humor to get you to stop crying. You're too upset to realize, and only nod. Arthur could cry himself at that. I'm still a kid myself, he thinks, in the back of his mind; Hosea only smiles at him, before righting his expression to look at you.

"I figure we all do," he says. Looking to Arthur, he raises his brows. "You intendin' to try again?"

Arthur sighs, shrugs his shoulders. He doesn't feel so dissimilar to you: vaguely ashamed, upset, embarrassed. "I was gon' ask what'chu thought I oughtta do," he admits.

Almost imperceptibly, Hosea's face softens further. "Well," he says, looks back to you to dry your eyes and wipe your nose with the sleeve of his button-up. Natural-born for a man that's never raised kids this young. "I never was in school, 'n' I'd say I'm quite well-educated."

"Never had a class on humbleness, I see," Arthur says.

Hosea snorts. "Don't listen to him," he says without sparing a glance.

"What's humbleness?" You ask, oblivious.

"Oh," Arthur says, steps forward to ruffle the hair atop your head. "Y'see, Uncle Dutch is real humble."

The other man bites his cheek to stave off a smile. "Arthur," he warns, looking up at him.

But it's a good opportunity to send you off and allow the two of them to talk in private, so he leans over to catch your gaze. "If you go tell Dutch he's humble, I'll give you a dollar," he promises, patting your shoulder.

"Is humble mean?" You ask.

"Y'catch on quick," Arthur says, grinning. John has certainly given you coins to say worse to him, though he found it funny each time. Your face is puffy and red, and he finds it sweet that you paused every other thought going through your head to consider it. "No, it ain't mean, sweetheart. Very nice, in fact."

Very mean to lie about, he thinks, and when you turn on your heel to go and earn yourself a dollar, he knows you will be just fine. Hosea laughs only when you've pattered away.

"Odd critters, kids," Arthur says. He sounds far too fond.

It was an easy choice. It had been a stretch to even take you to school, and the adults had all agreed that you'd likely miss most of it, anyways. They could only change so much about their lives, even if it was no way to raise you.

Sometimes Arthur wonders what it'd be like to live a normal life with you. To find someone to help him raise you proper, like a civilized family. He doesn't speak of it, but he's sure they all know that he wonders. Maybe they do, too. He thinks on it less after testing those waters with school, but once in a blue moon, the dream comes back to him.

Arthur ran into a block, as far as teaching you how to read went. He'd sat you on his lap and tried his damnedest to answer the fifty questions that every sentence of Dutch's borrowed book provoked you to ask, but he had run out of answers very quickly despite it being one of the simplest ones he had to offer.

For the last two days, he has been laying awake at night trying to answer why, exactly, bear means both an animal and an action that seemingly makes no sense. Tried and failed to use Hosea's beat-up old Bible to teach you a few words, because by the second verse it was losing him a little, too. That one made him feel quite stupid.

Hosea is better suited for that, they'd decided. He seemed a little tired being asked to teach yet another person to read, but Arthur knows that irritation is only skin-deep and watches it disappear whenever you're around. When Arthur said he wasn't sure where to start with writing, either, Hosea put a hand on his shoulder and told him the alphabet in a tone that told him he was on his own, unless he really got too lost.

It is fair. Arthur wants to teach you as much as he can, too, finds a sort of warmth about it.

The pride he feels watching you copy the alphabet he'd printed out — as steady as he could, admittedly nervous he'd screw it up and somehow damage your intellect forever, is this what being a dad feels like? — was greater than any he'd felt before. Your handwriting is unsteady, and he has to readjust the pencil in your grip more than once, but by all accounts, it is much easier to answer what sound does this make? than what's a garden?

He lets you work. Arthur likes, too, that this way your first writings will be kept in his journal. He already protects it like a sacred thing; now, it'll probably be on his body or in his pocket until you're old enough to marry someone. Even then, if all goes well, he'll have it.

Oh, how the thought of you growing up distresses him. He can't imagine what you might look like older, even though it sneaks up on him every year come your birthday that your eyes and nose are looking more adjusted to your skull, that your face is sharpening out from baby-round. He could hardly picture John as anything but the scraggly little mutt Dutch dragged back into camp when he had. It's a familiar, more intense fear.

Shit, Arthur doesn't even know what he himself will look like come three year's time.

He's twenty-five and still changing. Will he see what your face settles on?

Is this what it is to be a father?

He thinks so. There can't be any other truth, because he's faced this feeling every time you've hit a milestone. He was glad you didn't need to be carried constantly anymore, but so very depressed that you could walk; he was overjoyed when you said his name clear as day for the first time, but he was terrified at the thought that he may one day be Arthur to you.

It's sad, but it makes him smile when you look up and proclaim that your wobbly rendition of the letter W — dubba-yuh, as you say, he won't ever get over how children always sound like they are drunk — looks almost exactly like his.

Grimshaw and Hosea make a fuss, playing cards at the poker table some yards away. You ignore them entirely, absorbed in your own little world, writing at your own pace. With ears that turn off so easily, he worries about how you'll do hunting. He could've heard Grimshaw asking Hosea in exasperation why he's not cheating, you old fool, from a mile away.

Then comes Dutch, after you've scrawled a few more letters. Walking quiet up to the pair of you sat in the grass outside Arthur's tent, observing from above you before he speaks.

"Arthur?" He asks, and he sounds odd, considering that they're doing nothing unusual.

He looks up. "Yeah?"

Dutch points to the open journal. You look between them, then, interested in whatever is going on now that your dad is involved. "Did you forget the letter Z?"

Arthur squints, looks back at the journal. Oh. His ears turn red, but he only clears his throat. "I mean, who uses Z anyways?" He dismisses.

The prospect of being able to show some kind of smartness beyond a full-grown adult's seems to excite you. "Where's Z go?" You ask Dutch.

He kneels, takes the pencil and book from you to write it in after Y. In cursive. Christ, Arthur thinks, but he doesn't say anything.

"Right here, my dear," he says. Handing you the pencil back, he smiles as you skip over the others to add your own interpretation early. "Now, will you cover your ears for me?" Perplexed, but you obey anyways. Arthur is already narrowing his eyes before Dutch turns to him. "You are a goddamn fool, you know that?"

There's no malice in it, only amusement. He looks positively chuffed, which almost irritates Arthur more than if he truly meant to call him an idiot. "Who even uses Z?" He repeats, waves a hand. "It ain't that big'a mistake."

"I don't know," Dutch scoffs. "A zebra?"

"A zebra?" Arthur says, in disbelief. "You ever seen one for y'self?"

Dutch's brows raise. "Are you—?" His face falls into mock graveness. "Arthur Morgan," he says, feigning disappointment. "You can't be serious."

"Well, have you?"

"I ain't gon' dignify that with a response," Dutch says, turns to smile at you. He always smiles at you, at least, Arthur likes that about the man. He plucks one of your hands off your head. "You're good, now, honey. Keep writin'."

[kaidatheghostdragon]

That trope where danny and jason meet during jason's six months dead? That, but with good fenton parents.

Jason is either the same age or a year or two younger than danny (between danny'and ellie's age). The fentons know danny is a ghost and have already adopted ellie. Team phantom includes the entire fenton family and valerie (and obv sam and tucker), maybe even valerie's dad.

Vlad is either reformed (post agit with teen dan?), blackmailed into submission, ran out of town, or "dealt with." The giw have been run out of town, and may or may not still exist somewhere licking their wounds. Peaceful ghosts are openly welcomed in the town, which is phantom's haunt, the fentons plus red huntress deal with the troublemakers, and the phantom siblings handle the biggest threats. May or may not be an everyone knows au.

Anyways, danny runs into the ghost of robin and is all, holy shit, a teen vigilante died, and immediately drags robin home to get all the overbearing comfort and love the fenton family can provide.

Somehow, that transformed into the fentons adopting the ghost of robin as one of their own. Jason even starts going to caspar high. Everyone knows that jason is a ghost of a kid who died too young and may be considered an honorary phantom, only team phantom knows that he's robin, and may have learned a concerning amount about batman from jason, depending on how open he is.

The joker disappears a month after jason joins the fentons and the fenton parents have solid alibis to prove they werent involved (having access to phantom's ghost allies is a large boon).

After six months of living (excuse the term) with the fentons, its as if jason has always been part of the family. So his sudden disappearance is a shock. Its treated as a ghostnapping, and the fentons are quick to use the boomerang to track him down.

They find a near-catatonic, but very much living, jason either wandering gotham, or just as he's being carted off by talia. If the latter, wrecking the league of assassins probably becomes an entire team phantom affair.

Jason is brought back home, and between the fentons and frostbite, they find a way to treat jason, learning that his living body is developing into a halfa in a similar slow manner that vlad did, but with jason's ghost core already fully developed.

That's four different halfas created in four different ways (five for five if teen dan exists), plus the increasingly liminal population of amity park, and the human members of team phantom so strongly liminal that they all have protocores and will probably become halfas when they die.

At this point, the story can go multiple directions.

If the fentons wrecked the league of assassins, either they discovered damian or talia dropped him off with bruce a few years early, when tim is just starting out as robin. If the fentons have damian, serious discussions about informing bruce of his biokid ensue, and the fact that theyve also adopted his undead son will inevitably come up and whether jason wants to deal with that mess of emotions.

If damian is dropped off with bruce, bruce is gonna hear stories of an orange man that can bust through walls, his teal assassin wife, their fiery daughter, and pair/trio of loyal white haired pit demons (assuming jason's ghost is white haired, and whether or not he's well enough to join), that wrecked ra's shit and sealed away the pits. He *will* investigate. Also, damian and tim will probably have to be kept separated, probably by having tim patrol with dick while bruce wrangles the feral child. This is smack dab in the middle of the worst period of the batfams social dynamics, but otoh, damian being younger will ultimately be better for him as he'll probably be deprogrammed a lot easier.

If the fentons never cross paths with the loa, another avenue is still open with the giw. If they've been run out of amity, but the anti ecto acts still exist, the justice league still have a chance to encounter them. Perhaps after amity ran the giw out, a formal complaint was filed to the justice league (they finally broke through the giw's blackout), but it was labelled a non-emergency (because the complaint described how the town couldnt get the message out until *after* they dealt with the problem) and was never investigated for being labelled a low priority. Baby robin tim found the file while exploring the bat computer and asked bruce about it, kicking off an investigation.

On the flipside, the giw try to convince the justice league that hostile entities have taken control of a small midwestern city, maybe the league is convinced right up until batman comes face to face with jason and is willing to hear him out.

If none of the above, jason could start talking about how he wants to return home to help crime alley, and the fentons support him all the way. You could even have jason still become red hood the crime lord, minus the family drama and joker ultimatum, and the training he would have gotten from the league is covered by ghost hunting, halfa powers, and the fenton parents' ecclectic skillset. Cue gotham being slowly invaded by team phantom as each child in turn goes to gotham U for college to be near and support jason.

Or jason is perfectly happy to stay in amity forever, but jazz goes to gotham U for its psychology program. She tries to keep her head low, but batman at this point runs a background check on every psychology major in gotham U (maybe bruce wayne funded a reform of the program - the reason why its now lauded as one of the best in the nation - to try to prevent more rogues being created.) Jazz pings a few warning criteria because her parents match a handful of mad scientist traits, so batman is now doing a full investigation on her family and finds a picture of jason.

Ignoring all of that, maybe jason keeps tabs on batman and is extremely upset that he's taken on another robin after the last one died. He's emotionally stable enough, and the fentons emotionally competent enough, to get him to talk and work through his emotions, but everyone agrees a wellness check for the new robin is in order. They go to gotham and confront batman, realize he's an emotional mess and that tim forced his way into the role and decide that the bats are all fentons now, no batman, you cannot escape. Assimilation is inevitable. We *will* get you to work through your grief and make you a better vigilante because of it. And tim has been abandoned by his parents and is living alone? That wont do. We're going to assume for your benefit that you were too grief-stricken to notice bruce, but you will not be making any more oversights like that under our watch.

There are probably a dozen other directions this could go, but mostly i just wanted to provide some prompts/ideas with ghost/halfa jason as a fenton. I need more fluffy fenton dynamics and jason fluff.

[liberumalas]

I LOVE YOUR DRAWINGS/ ART STYLE ALASTOR AS A CHILD IS SO CUTE !!!

What do you think baby and child Alastor was like growing up like personality and how did he get along with others and what he was like at school? Do you think he was a hard to handle baby or one of those quiet ones (fully conscious baby lol 😭)

ATTENTION, THESE ARE ALL HEADCANNONS. I'll refer back to canon when there is information but we don't know much of Alastors early life. Or of anything about him at all that much. This is gonna be a loooong one...

I also think, I'll colour code a little; orange is what is actually canon and blue is the stuff that i think ive read somewhere but might not be true or might become outdated.

I. Alastor and mental health

I think it is very likely that Alastor has ASPD (antisocial personality disorder) othervise known as psychopathy. Now people with this disorder are not inherently evil, but I'd think their upbringing takes a lot more care, attention and knowledge than the avarege person because people with aspd don't experience empathy, and regret after hurting someone or at least these feelings are very limited. They are also very likely to disregard rules, be reckless, agressive, impulsive, decietful, etc...

Alastors childhood propably stems from the 1900s to the early 1920s roughly (we don't know when he was born, only that he died in 1933 and was in his 30s-40s). Psychology was not as advanced as it is today, and it was especially propably unavailable for a child of colour.

So I think that Alastors behavior was very poorly managed throughout his childhood, leading to him becoming a not very good person (a serial killer).

II. School life

In school he'd act violent toward classmates he didn't favor. It's been said that he has a messed up moral code, but a moral code still, so I'd imagine that means either getting revenge for those who were wronged in some way and could not protect themselves (and Alastor actually liked them) or protecting those who cannot protect themselves. Either way, these likely ended up in Alastor beating another boy up, putting glass shards in his sandwich or ruining his status or reputation in some way. In fights he'd be creative and use his surroundings, other than mindless punching.

Towards his friends (whom were very likely all girls) he'd act very polite, charming and even kind. He'd enjoy spending time with them instead of other young boys who were a lot less mature and sometimes straight up repulsive and barbaric. Him and his friends would hang out, gossip, dance, etc, he was always just *one of the girls* lol. This is also where I'd imagine the moral code comes in, because of early 1900s mentality and sexism and boys bothering girls and Alastor standing up for them and those were very different times and Alastor just seems like a very uniqe case.

So he'd get into trouble all. The. Time. His poor mother is just tired and at a loss at this point. Nothing makes this kid behave better, there is no use of punishing him, she (or his father) can beat him (reminder that those were different times), talk to him, talk to teachers, punish him with chores and work, nothing works. It is a miracle he wasn't arrested yet.

III. General behavior and perception

I think he was always very confident, charismatic and passive agressive rather than outright violent (which he reserved for those he particularly hated and actually could fight or trick). He was polite usually (his mother thought him well in that regard, and being polite is very useful anyways) and very intelligent and tactical. People rarely caught onto his mischief and the targets would usually be too afraid to speak out. Usually. Or just be annoyed and if the target was an adult, hooo boy.

I think the people who knew him would see him as a troublemaker but someone who would have great potential if he wasn't such an annoying pain in the ass. He is theatrical, dramatic at times, they just really didn't know what to make of this kid. People who didn't know him would see him as a good kid, who has a strange sparkle in his eyes that could be something harmless and innocent or something that is very worrysome. Family thought he was strange, worrying, but outside that, helpful and a sweet kid. Other than the beating classmates up.

IV. Family stuff. God help me...

So... this is the part where the source of angst for every Alastor fanfiction comes from.

-About his mother:

She propably ended up in Heaven so thats the only indicator we have of her personality.

His mother was a caring, sweet as candied apple but a very troubled person. Troubled because of her husband, her son and society. But she was also very firm and and had a spine, and she was a great source of inspiration for Alastor. He loved her very much (in his own way) and enjoyed being around her.

(fyi we don't actually know, which of Alastors parents was creole and which one was white or smth else. All we know is that he himself is mixed creole.)

Alastor loved his mother's cooking and they'd both like jazz and swing and all these types of fun. She encoureged him throughout his life, though she likely didn't know about his serial killer hobby later in life. Or if she did, than that was a very complicated situation.

And oh boy, oh, man, the father of the year.

-Dear old Dad.

I don't think that for Alastor to have a valid reason to hate him (and by extension almost all men) his father had to be phisically abusive, even though beating or hitting your child was common practice to punish them. What I mean is he didn't have to throw bottles at his son's head, beat him to a bloody pulp or strangle him and his mother for Alastor to hate his guts. I think that him being pathetic and disgusting in Alastor's eyes is very much enough and maybe makes even more sense. Hear me out.

Think about the stereotypical man. The ones women oh so hate. He drinks, he smokes so much, you can't see him, he cheats and lies and he is just a mean little bitch.

(I'm a man myself, don't kill me, I wrote that from the perspective of Alastor Manhater.)

And if his father did these things that were (are somewhat still unfortunately) not at all uncommon among other men, Alastor's hatred of this can be easily extended to every man who cannot prove otherwise. Maybe even those who can or could.

So I think that while it is possible that dear ol' Dad was horribly violent towards his family, it would be a lot less clichè and maybe even make more sense for him to be a pathetic cheater who drinks and smokes and is just unpleasant to be around.

Alastor would fucking hate his guts. His father is rude to his mother and to him, he is useless, he is pathetic, he is spending the hard earned money on cigarettes, alcohol and brothels. He lies, he's mean, he's just a horrible person.

Alastor would never want to be like him, though ironically some traits he can't help but learn from him. Lying, being mean to others, he'd also as an adult would occaisionally smoke.

I also think that his relationship with his gender is not the best, in a sense that he doesn't like being a boy, because all boys are douchebags and he doesn't want to be a douchebag. Not like his father anyway.

Okay, closing words.

First of all, I'm not a native english speaker and i wrote this very very late.

Second of all, this is, again all just my idea of what Alastors early life might have looked like. Season 2 is coming soon and it was said that Alastors backstory would be important and would be explored, although that could mean his arrival and early times in Hell as well, we'll have to see.

If you yourself have any other ideas or thoughts or you think I got something wrong, comment it, I'd love to read other fans' thoughts!

Anyways, thank you for reading this far! I'd love to write in a similar format about Alastor's time as an adult or a mixed person working in radio in the late 1920s to early 1930s, so let me know, if that interests you! I'll propably do better research for that, in this one most of the history knowledge is from memory, so if ive made any errors, again, let me know.

Alright, goodbye now.

[grumfield]

I need to hear more about sondad anakin and obi-wan trying to get his padawan to parent him 👀👀👀

LFMAO there’s so much to this

Ok so there’s a scene in It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia where Mac gets upset because their old pedo gym teacher tried to molest his other friends when they were kids but not him and starts worrying it’s because he wasn’t special or cute enough. And this is literally like the closest thing I can compare to the complex Rogue Planet/Jedi Apprentice/Jedi Quest continuity Obi-Wan has lfmao

This legends continuity of Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon’s relationship is like deeply fucked in a sadly funny way because Qui-Gon is the most self centered neglectful narcissist on the planet who literally doesn’t give a single fuck about Obi-Wan at all and constantly tries to drop him. Obi-Wan as a kid wasn’t good enough to be a Jedi so was sent to work on a farm and then BEGGED Qui-Gon to take him on, meanwhile Qui-Gon only mentored and cares about Extra Special Boys and Obi-Wan was Very Unspecial to him. And all of Obi-Wan’s behavior in Jedi Apprentice is basically just him trying to appease and get approval from a guy who dgaf about him. In trying to be an Ideal Jedi Obi-Wan only further makes Qui-Gon not like him which just creates a really weird dynamic and Qui-Gon tries to ditch Obi wan like on 3 separate occasions

So basically a lot of Obi-Wan’s behavior is always from a place of seeking this fatherly/mentor approval that was only given sparingly. He’s always like. Trying to be the best Jedi ever best most adoptable dog at the pound and it never pays off because 1) Qui-Gon doesn’t like loyal dogs and 2) before he could ever be good enough to get Knighted (Qui-Gon didn’t pass him for his his first knighting ceremony he failed it which is why he was a padawan at 25) He DIES!! And also knows that there was another Special Boy lined up.

Anyways I’ve talked a lot on here about his orthodoxy but in this sense I’ve always read it as what he falls back on (at this age) because of personal insecurity and a sudden lack of potential affirmation and order that he sought in Qui-Gon— he never got the confirmation that his way of being a Jedi was ever good enough, so he cares a lot about being the platonic ideal of a good Jedi and is intent on making anakin into that too. But he still yearns for that affirmation or whatever

Anyways this is all leading up to say that a lot of his interactions with Anakin at this stage are sort of projecting this and also sort of getting frustrated that this Special Boy who is supposed to be THE chosen one, the ultimate Jedi savior, is behaving in a very un-Jedi way. He is a priest getting frustrated that Jesus doesn’t know the Catholic Mass. Like he spends a lot of time looking for Jedi guidance in Anakin’s inherent existence the way he sought guidance in Qui-Gon, and is sort of similarly coming up short because Anakin is a baby who wants to play toys.

Not to oedipize it too much too but in Rogue Planet Obi-Wan specifically deep (very distinctly non-parental and VERY weird) love for Anakin really early and is really almost obsessively admires how powerful he is, but in JQ starts to become more critical of his inability to embody the Jedi teachings (ergo teach Obi-Wan how he’s supposed to be a good Jedi) and it REALLY REALLY feels like a kid who idolizes the their father starting to come down when they realize their father isn’t necessarily as perfect as they thought.

But like Obi-Wan’s own withholding nature makes Anakin seem his approval especially as a kid and so. Like. It’s this weird circular messy thing where they both want each other’s approval and affirmation but don’t get it. They’re both like please parent me! And then best I can offer you is brotherwife husbandson

And like!! It’s so weird!! IT’S SO WEIRD!! Anyways the most receptive Obi-Wan ever is to Anakin is when he gets “go to your room young man”d by him

[causeimcrayzeebee]

have you seen the kamimura lore drop and what are your thoughts?

ohbmy god this could’ve been so embarrassing cause i hadn’t seen it yet and was so confused as to what you meant so I was planning on just yapping about kamimura in general but then I saw it LMAO UM I WAS SO HAPPY CAUSE KAMIMURA CONTENT!!!!! KAMIMURA LORE!!! AND THEN SO FUCKING INCREDIBLY SAD FROM IT LIKE....THAT'S GORE... THAT'S GORE OF MY COMFORT CHARACTER.... um yeah I have work for law to do but I got too into reading the lore drop so lets talk about it! (I will get to my work after trust) spoiler warning for chapters 1-3 and tetro typical trigger warnings!!! take care of yourself!!

I am not going to cover the ableism portion or too much of the diagnosis/hospital parts because I am not personally disabled and would like to let other disabled people talk about it, so i'll leave the rest of the conversation to others in the community!

also i took notes while reading it to organize my thoughts like usual (im so bad at putting words together well). some of these are kinda funny so here are some highlights lmfao

alright, now lets actually be serious.

firstly, I'm so glad that kamimura at least had a good childhood. I think it really shows in the way he interacts with the tetro pink cast that he was a sociable and happy kid! my mom actually teaches preschool so shes taught me a lot about early childhood psychology (shout out to my mother guys!!!!!). one of the biggest takeaways I've had from her is that the first five years of one's life are the most important in development! that's what Montessori programs keep in mind and throughout preschool and early kinder, they take time to establish learning through play; a lot of people have the misconception that letting kids play at school is just letting them mess around, but it's crucial in building their skills! kids learn to socialize with others and to problem solve; that foundation is very important for everything else moving forward in life! I could rant about how preschools need to utilize this more, esp in the American education system, but I digress. my main point goes to something I (and a couple other people I'm not original in this LMAO) have mentioned before about how it makes more sense out of hasegawa and kamimura, that they'd kill off kamimura because he had other people. kamimura, despite having further and further cut himself off from the world right till the end (until the kg at least), still managed to make meaningful connections, like tamba and hayashi, even if they weren't like ideal. the way he approaches tamba is very caring in a way that can seem like it's not, yk? likely it stems from his trust issues, it's scary to put your genuine real feelings out there, so hiding them with some snide remarks is easier. luckily, tamba has a similar approach so hey. shout out tamba n kamimura you will always be special to me.

anyways, its both so amazing and so heartbreaking that his parents were so loving and supportive, but died too soon. I do wonder about the role of attachment in this case; like specifically in babies/toddlers, they get attached to their parents usually because that's the first person they see, the first to take care of them. kamimura was able to get that love and support from his parents, even when it got so much harder and the days in the hospitals got longer. so having it all be taken away when you're NINE? that's obviously gonna destroy you, and that leads to his trust issues and isolation. he was able to thrive still as a young child because he had his parents to support him! so when that's all gone, how else are you supposed to cope?

yeah fuck you family friend, that was brutal. I cant even imagine coming home from school to find your parents absolutely desecrated. the day of his parents death beginning the routine of staying locked in his room.... oh my god like what if I cried (I did). that probably changed the way he thought about his room; his room was an escape from the horrors of the outside world. if he just stayed in the room, he wouldn't have to experience the fucked up world. it became a habit. EUGAHHD I'm in shambles.

after the murder of his parents, it's understandable that it shook kamimura and his aunt to their core. that was a violent murder (by a man who was literally just rejected romantically.... its so fucking upsetting that that is a common crime). his aunt wasn't even ready to have kids so having the responsibility of taking in kamimura must've been a lot. In regards to homesick, despite the very clear distance in their relationship, kamimura really seems to appreciate her being there, even if it was very distanced; she was still an important part of his grieving process and his whole life honestly.

oh boy here we go. isao when I catch you istg..... sorry that's an exaggeration, likely this was from a societal disgust, yk just homophobia from the world, so I cant really blame this kid too much.... but we still have beef. god, this was one of those actually crushing crushes, hm. it's so fucked up; someone who was starting to get kamimura a bit out of the dark space that was his life, giving him something to enjoy and be happy about! and all of that was just thrown away because kamimura was vulnerable and shared his feelings. not having your feelings returned can already be devastating, but this? the spread of rumors, the bullying, the losing his one friend? it's like the world wants to torture him omfg. here the trust issues become worse; those who loved him leave, those who he loved leave. everyone just leaves, so what's the point?

this explains his relationship with hasegawa, and the issue after trial 1. it had to have felt way too familiar; telling someone he was fond of vulnerable information, only for it to be told to a bunch of people he never wanted in his fucking business. however, I think the reason why they made up rather quickly in clean up crew (which btw I watched w my friend earlier today bc I got them into tetro........ god I love that episode) is hasegawa's response. hasegawa, unlike isao, is remorseful, he CARES. hasegawa even shares something personal to him, about his own loss.

I think this also changes the scene of hasegawa coming out a bit. before, he was rejected by isao because he was a homophobic douchebag. but in the student spotlight, hasegawa casually says he's not into girls. while its funny thinking that kamimura was having some gay panic then lmao, I think actually it was probably processing that in a confused comfort, not exactly because his feelings could be reciprocated, but for this; hasegawa was so comfortable with coming out as gay, so comfortable with the concept, unlike isao. if kamimura confessed his feelings to hasegawa, and were (somehow) not reciprocated, he likely still wouldn't have ran away. of course, with kamimura's trust issues, he probably wasn't confident in that assumption, but hasegawa is not the kind of person to drop someone because they confessed to them. he would've kept the person that had become so important to him. and because of that maybe, just maybe, kamimura would've said what he really wanted to say if the interview had happened before woodshop.

once he's on his own and moves out, he no longer has someone reminding him to do things, so with no motivation to simply live, he ends up staying locked in his house like we've seen before. what's the point in anything? when that kind of spiral hits you, and you don't have other people present in your life to keep doing, how would you ever stay motivated?? I know it was a really informal post, so I might be going insane trying to add this to the analysis, but the repetition of 'but life goes on' I think really solidifies the importance of a support system. when things are difficult, the world never just stops, it keeps going despite your struggle. but having people who care about you around you can help make each day easier, they can help 'slow down time' if you will. kamimura has gone through an amount of stress no one should have to face, but people around him could have made it easier on him by being there. that's the tragedy of tetro.

it's especially tragic that at the very end, right before the kg, he was taking his own life.

(plot wise, I need to know what y'all theorists think of this bc I have ideas but i need to finish the staffside logs before I can even actually consider my thoughts lmfao.)

sorry to be captain obvious on a majority of this post lol but gosh wow. I really loved that we got this, it was so much information I am kinda stoked despite basically all of it being depressing as hell. tetro has really become an inspiration for me and writing, I am constantly so impressed by von's writing and it's given me perspective on how to approach writing as a whole. i feel as though this gave me so much perspective on kamimura himself as a character. some of this just confirmed my ideas already, but it strikes me as something so human just learning all of this. when I, or anyone really, first meet people, I only know surface level things, yk cause I don't know them. but then I start talking to them, and I learn about different things that have happened to them, how they feel about certain issues or what they're doing on a day to day basis. you can never know everything of course, but when you discover new parts of someone, it makes them more complex and they don't fit the idea you had of them before because people are complex!! and that's the beauty of writing, capturing humanity! the impact of each character, esp kamimura, has been so beautifully done, I'm just constantly moved as the story progresses.

thank y'all sm for reading my excuse to talk about kamimura, this was A LOT of blabbing I'm so so sorry but I hope you enjoyed haha! :)

[oh-no-its-bird]

Someone said Hokage Tora and now I'm thinking about what would need to happen to make that a reality.

Ok so we're gonna shuffle the Hokage's and their timelines around.

(Also note: at this point, Tora very sympathetic to the Uchiha bc of his relationships w Shisui Itachi and Sasuke)

So Sarutobi dies and people are going "oh noooo someone go and get Tsunade back"

And Tora gets PISSED.

They want another Senju to have the hat?? Are you fucking kidding him??? 2 in a row was bad enough but 3 sets a standard. Choose literally anyone else! Anyone!! Fucking Kakashi would make a better Hokage!!!

And then he stops.

Hmmm. Kakashi as Hokage.

That... wouldn't be too bad, actually?

Long story short: Tora starts to campaign for Kakashi as Hokage.

Kakashi does not appreciate this. Stop immediatley.

Tora is on the civilian council at this point (at the terrifyingly young age of like 17) and lowkey has them under his thumb. So he's able to get them all aboard, meaning Kakashi is officially civilian approved.

The Uchiha are into it to, with him lowkey being the closest they've been able to get to the seat since fucking Madara. He has one of their eyes, he's lead/taught both of the clan head kids, and hes visibly, publicly close to multiple Uchiha/Uchiha sympathizers (Itachi, Shisui, Tora)

He's the yodaime's student which gives him major points in the politics department, + he actually knows what it is like to be in the life of a Hokage, he has seen and been involved in that life firsthand

Hes also on good, personal terms with a few clan heads and solidly neutral terms w the other clans

His clan is innofensivley small (read: fucking wiped out) so there's no concern with biases of a guy coming from a specific clan, working w a bias for that clan

Perfect candidate!!

(Something something Kakashi quietly touching his eyelid and mumbling to Obito that he guesses he'll be able to show him even more of his dream than even he'd expected)

Danzo tries to intimidate him into not accepting it and while Kakashi does agree that he would be one of the worst options, the conversation kinda... leaves him a little less sure he'd really be the worst option.

Anyways, Kakashi as the godaime hokage!!

He hates it.

Tora Shisui and Itchi have to hunt him down the day of his ascension and fuckin wrestle him on stage (he's gonna go home and scream into his pillow later)

How would Naruto canon change with Kakashi as the Hokage so early?? Until this point, the au has mostly been sticking to the script (minus the Uchiha massacre) but this is a HUGE status quo change for a character decently central in the cast list, and it's a change that'd impact just about everything going forward! Don't ask me how exactly because I know very very little about the actual specifics and events of canon but holy shit it'd sure change the course of history, huh? If you wanna get really down to the nitty gritty technicalities, we could take serious liberties and kill off and or save several characters with the simple explanation of "different Hokage, different people assigned to different missions"

Anyways:

Team Ro gets to be his personal guards,, they need a replacement for the team since Kakashi left, maybe we can throw in someone else to join them and add some more chemistry in there

I don't think it'd be anyone on team 7 (I don't live in a world where I can see Kakashi tossing specifically THEM in ANBU that young, no matter how more powerful or better taught than cannon, sorry) also conflicting interests w THREE uchiha on a team or the Haruno siblings. Also, Naruto is Naruto, so. *political noises*

Actually the slot is a very valuable one since they're basically Kakashi's special little guys (anbu eddition) so it's really hard to think of a character that'd even conceivably be put on it. (Part of me wants to add Neji for literally no reason other than I suddenly want him in the AU but that'd bring a whole mountain of implications with him if Kakashi chose HIM specifically to join his personal guard + he's suddenly in ANBU, what??)

Wait would Kakashi even choose the replacement personally.

Wait wait ok. Record scratch. Rewind. Let's try this again.

So. With Kakashi's promotion, Tora gets to he team leader. One of the first things he's told is to find a new replacement for the team

"Shouldn't you do that yourself?" Says Tora

"You've got me to take the hat I refuse to move so much as a single fucking finger more at your request." Says Kakashi, who then delights in bodily removing Tora from the room via the window.

I don't know Neji's actual age but for the sake of this fic he's suddenly Tora's age or only a year younger (Tora is like 17 at this point)

Him and Neji do not get along!! At all!!!! Actually it was kind of hate on sight.

Uhh insert montage where they become grudgingly almost friends but still mostly frenemies

Neji is very talented and Tora is frustrated by how he seems to be being "held back" in some way. Like, he doesn't like the guy! But damn if he doesn't know how it feels to have the system itself fighting you, no matter how good you prove you are and how hard you work.

Anyways, Tora finding out Neji was skipped over and denied for different promotions or smthn bc hyuuga second class or whatever.

And him going "hmmmmmmmmm...."

He hands Kakashi a form with Neji's name on it and Kakashi signs without even looking.

When he scowls and asks if he's even going to look, Kakashi just gives him a dry look.

"Like I dont know whoever you've picked won't be for whatever plot you're cooking up next. Just don't set anything on fire where I can see it and I don't care."

A very, very confused Neji is suddenly told he's not only going to join ANBU but also the Hokage's private guard.

Hey Tora !! What the fuck !!!

They have one of those "You don't even like me??" "I don't have to like you to want to see how far you can go." moments

Queue Neji angrily revealing that it doesn't matter "how far he can go" or how many opportunities are afforded to him bc his limits are fuckin branded on him, and shows Tora his seal mark

Hey Neji !! What the fuck !!!

Hyuuga reformation arc,,,

Ok so not sympathetic Hiashi Hyuuga but like,, rational (deeply fucking flawed) person Hiashi who is able to leverage the "Neji has been ordered to work directly the Hokage" @ the Hyuuga clan elders to at least slightly loosen the seal on him.

TONNS of political drama in the Hyuuga house w Neji being chosen for such a huge position, but w the complications of "they can't fucking voice it outloud" bc ANBU identities are supposed to be super top secret, so it's kept to the really high ranks only

(There's an AU of an AU out there where instead of stopping the Uchiha coup, Tora went "ok but are they wrong tho", decided to help instead, and got the Hyuuga lower cast to join them)

(Look he wants to reform the government, right? Ok so why SHOULDNT he support an attempt to rip it up by the roots?? The Uchiha want equality but Tora wants reformation. They do not know what they just let into their homes.)

What the fuck did I come here to talk about again?

Right, sorry, Hokage Tora

Uhhhh pivoting again here we go ->

So Kakashi is Hokage!!! And he !! Wants !! Out !!!

Tora is a very very clear contender for "the next Hokage", even early on in Kakashi's career. He's basically the guy who MADE Kakashi Hokage (both arranging it and forcing him to accept) and most important people know it.

I'm ngl I kind of don't know how exactly we'd get to hokage Tora.

Maybe Kakashi is temporarily taken out of commission and he's just the obvious replacement. Maybe we do a proper Hokage switch and promote him when Kakashi got the job in the original. Dunno! But Tora for Rokudaime all the way !!

If not Tora I think Rokudaime Neji could be suitably dramatic and fun. Also has similar themes of "rising from the lower ranks against the odds" and just in general tons of interesting implications both politically and like,, character interaction wise.

Everyone expects Tora for the next hokage but Tora decides he likes being the powerful guy in the shadows to a Hokage who knows both how to listen to him and how to lead with a strength and surety he can trust. And decides Neji is apparently that guy who has the leadership and wisdom he can trust.

Callback to the earlier moment where Neiji, voice cracking, goes "you don't even like me."

And Tora gives him a smirk and goes "I don't have to like you to want to see see how far you can go."

Mmmm actually I think I like that ending best, it has the most weight to me. Like, yeah Tora as Rokudaime is cool and a kind of ironic "full circle" moment, but Neji as Rokudaime has that gut punch energy that will leave your skin buzzing and your eyes tearing up with written right

Have to get going but I might try to draw that scene tommorow if I find the energy in me after work (doubtful tbh)

I love a good call back through dialogue in different character defining moments that leave you pointing at the screen shrieking "HE SAID THE THING!!"

[icantdousernamesman]

THE MARAUDERS ERA SIBLINGS

As someone with 5 younger siblings, I refuse to believe that the marauders era characters were almost all only children.

So may i present, MY SIBLING HCS FOR THEM!!!

James- Defo an only child, spoilt rotten and couldnt do anything wrong in his parants eyes. Monty and Effie had him relitively old too, like probably early-mid 40s. Defo a planned baby, they were probs trying for a while but it didnt work so they started to think that they waited too late, so james was like a miricle to them.

Sirius/Regulus- Obviously theyre brothers, feel like they were planned but unwanted. Like, walburga was betrothed to orion, who was lot older than her btw, and they had to consumate their marrage right away, so i feel like sirius was consieved on their wedding night. Walburga wouldve been 13-16 at the time, and orion wouldve been 25-32. Feel like they had another pregnancy right before regulus but it miscarried early on, so when regulus was consived they just pretended that it was the same one. Regulus wouldve been consieved very shortly after sirius bc theyd like as many heirs as possible, like the rest of their family. They wouldve been all disapointed when he was born a girl and i think he wouldve been a difficult pregnency too. After that they wouldve tried again, and had multiple miscarriges before they finally stopped trying.

Remus- Hope and Lyall wanted more kids after remus, but instead they decided that after remus was bitten it woud just be too difficut and not fair on the other kid or remus to be in that situation.

OR

if we're going with the theory that remus was put up for adoption or somthing bc his parants either died or couldnt take him, then i reckon hed have a younger half sister, about 7 years younger than him, and two younger half-brothers, roughly 5 and 9 years younger than him. But either way i feel like hope and lyall had remus young, at like 18 or 20. Defo wasnt planned.

Peter- Peter would've had an older brother by about 10yrs i think. He doesnt see him anymore and hes THAT family member that the rest refuse to talk about for some reason. feel like he also has a 3 years older sister who he was close with, but died in the 1st war a while b4 he betrayed everyone. his brother wouldve been unplanned and his parants wouldve had him at about 21-24. Peter and his sister were both planed tho.

Mary- Girl has a LOT of siblings. Feel like shes a middle child, but the only witch in the family. Has about 6-8 siblings maybe, her being directly in the middle of them all, and also being a bit overlooked bc shes not always home and lives at a bording school, unlike the others who get public school. think she wouldve been rlly close w the youngest sibling before she started hogwarts, but then she started missing them growing up, so they ended up getting distanced. The oldest of her siblings wouldve been unplanned, but after that her parants just decided to go for it and keep having more. They all wouldve been in a relitively cramped flat in south london, probably with their parants in one room, the two oldest kids in another room, three middle kids in another room, and two youngest in a seperate one.

Lily- Honestly i can see it very well how it is, cannon compliant with her and petunia. Feel like they were both planned, and had a pretty mainstream and nuclear family.

Marlene- BROTHERS. Shes the youngest and only girl out of all of her siblings. She has one older brother by about 3-4 years, and then she also has about 3 or 4 older step-brothers from 6-10 years older than her. She was planned, and her parants originally wanted to have more kids after her, but they ended up splitting.

Dorcas- Feel like shes an only child tbh. Possibly has a younger sister, but she would be about 12 years younger than her or something. Would probs still be in hogwarts when dorcas died. Both would've been unplanned, but kept anyway.

Barty- Every ounce of bartys being just screams only child. He was planned, (and regretted) and his mum wanted one more kid after him and close in age, but his dad didnt want any more, so his mum just decided to use the "perfect on 1st try" phrase all the time. Think his parants wouldve been about 27-29 when they had him.

Evan/Pandora- ROSIER TWINS, OBVIOUSLY. They were planned babies, but i hc that their mum died in childbirth, so their dad raised them alone for about 3yrs, before he started dating and eventually married another woman, their step-mum. And about a 7-10 year age gap later, they had their little half-brother Felix. Evan liked him, but pandora LOVED him, and a few parts of him reminded her of regulus too. Felix was defo planned as well.

Brief bonuses

Alice- Has a younger brother and sister. Her brothers about 2 years younger than her, her sisters about 5 years younger. Her and her brother were planned, her sister was not.

Frank- Has a brother one year younger than him, both were planned.

Xeno- Has a brother 12 years older than him. His brother was planned, but he was not.

Molly/Gideon/Fabian- Gideon and Fabian were older than molly and both unplanned, and would always tease her. The twins were about 2 years older, and molly was also unplanned.

UNEXPECTED BONUS

Minnie- Idk why, but i feel like she had a twin sister that died unexpectedly young. Take that how u will.

(R.I.P Maggie smith)

[topaz-witch-tea]

hello! First of all, thank you for creating the Yanqing's Happy Family AU! I'm kind of obsessed with it, ngl, it's like, they're soooo cute!!!

Anyway, do you have any HC of when Yanqing doing his first mission as a Cloud Knight? In my head I always thought of the dads as the kind of parent that would secretly follow (*cough*stalk*cough*) their kid on their very first errand to the market, and the thought of that happening here is hilarious lmao🥰🥰

Then again, I just love all HC of the dads being protective of Yanqing in general, like maybe from an assassination attempt? It'll make a good angst :D

Thank you!!! They are super cute!!!❤️

They are very protective of Yanqing and I do have an assassination attempt on that is in the works. Still at the brainstorming phase thought so it'll be a while before it is written.

I wasn't sure which kind of mission you wanted so I provided 2 different ones. I love them being protective but anxious dads. Feel free to send more asks!!!

Supervised Mission

Up until he was 13, Yanqing's missions were always supervised by Jing Yuan or Jingliu. While the Xianzhou Alliance at heart was always at war, they did not have it in them to send Yanqing out on his own regardless of his skill. For those who stay behind, they are a bundle of nerves that grow more frantic each day. The battlefield is unpredictable and their little bird is so young and little. They could not bear it if his wings were clipped too early.

Even during supervised missions, there were always constant calls and follow-ups. Jing Yuan was always strict about not missing personal relationships with work, especially since it could lead to talks of Yanqing only achieving his position through nepotism. However, he would give constant updates and was only on the lookout for Yanqing's well-being. While he would sit back so his son could learn, any opponent that targeted his son would be quickly killed by Lightning Lord.

Jingliu, on the other hand, does not coddle Yanqing on missions. Coddling would only harm him and it is best he learn about the battlefield in a controlled environment. it was also why she refused to let the others join any mission Yanqing was on with the exception of Jing Yuan. Jingliu blocks the others before a mission due to their constant questions. One would think Dan Feng is the worst, but it's actually Yingxing. Dan Feng texts constantly at the beginning but will stop after a couple of hours. Yingxing sends a text every hour on the dot. "You guys are annoying. He's fine, if he wasn't I would text you."- JIngliu

First Solo Mission

A full-fledged assault by the Denizens of Abundance on a planetary system was met with the combined might of all six ships. Due to the scale of the battle and the need for all available personnel to be on the frontline, Yanqing's first solo mission on the battlefield was as reinforcements against the Windguard mecha beasts. At the same time, other members of his family were sent to different battles as well, leaving them unable to reach him.

Dan Feng, who was stationed on a water-filled planet due to his powers, was absolutely ferocious in battle. He cut through enemies without mercy. To him, the more they died, the less they were threats to his child. He also was extremely angry at being so far away and had no qualms about using his power to the fullest extent to end the battle quickly. The sooner he returned, the sooner he could see his child and tend to injuries. He could not find it in him to look at updates for Yanqing's battalion but he assumed if no messenger came, then his son was okay. "I need all of you to quickly die so I can go home and see my family."- Dan Feng after drowning a third of the enemy forces

Yingxing, despite being the most composed when it came to Yanqing, was filled with worry. He double, tripled checked his son's weapons before he left. He provided as much information as he could on the working on mechabeasts in the hopes the situation would be resolved before Yanqing arrived on the battlefield. Due to the days of waiting and overseeing the production of weapons, he was incredibly short with everyone though many understood why. Yingxing refused to check on anyone's status, partially because he was sure they were fine but also because any distressing news could impact his work and delay supplies and weapons to the frontlines. "You can tell that idiot of a supplies officer if he keeps delaying supplies to the front lines I will kill him!" - Yingxing to one of his students

Baiheng had joined other foxian pilots in a vicious battle against the wingweavers. She was the closest to Yanqing in terms of location and would constantly man the communication lines for updates on his situation. It went to the point where she would fall asleep with her radio tuned into the communication line and each morning she would check the casualty list. "Casualty list. Search. Yanqing. Unit name. Comet Orbit Fleet. Nothing! oh, thank Lan!"- Baiheng

Jingliu is easily the calmest in the situation. Older and more experienced than anyone else, she is very aware of the path of the Hunt and what it demands. Also, as Yanqing's teacher, she knows he will be fine. If he is old enough to copy her attacks, he will have no problem against the enemy. However, after every battle, she also checks the casualty list. "Baiheng, fine. Dan Feng, fine. Yingxing, fine. Jing Yuan, fine. Yanqing, fine. Good, they're all fine."- Jingliu

Jing Yuan was incredibly anxious. He did not fight as his time was spent strategizing not only for his fleet but the entire alliance. He did not have time to watch over matters concerning Yanqing much to his chagrin but he had ordered Qingzu to notify him of any updates no matter how small. He also found himself unable to sleep due to worry and during rare quiet periods, he spent it watching videos of Yanqing as a baby or looking at photos of them as a family to quell his aching heart. "He was so small back then. Soon, you'll be home Yanqing."- Jing Yuan who was getting teary-eyed after looking at photos of Yanqing playing with Mimi.

Yanqing made quite a stir on the battlefield. Not only did he take the Windguard head-on and chop its head off, but he also managed to strategically destroy their fleet. With their main offensive weapon out of the picture, the remaining enemy was in disarray and open to a swift and decisive offensive. "This is exhilarating!"- Yanqing developing a penchant for for fighting and the battlefield.

Yanqing was the last to make it back to the Luofu due to him being stationed the furthest from his family. He was, however, greeted with great excitement. Jing Yuan, who was the first to greet him once they were away from the other Cloud Knights, pulled him into a hug and checked over the wounds he got. Yingxing was next, having rushed over from the Artisanship Commission. He also pulled his child into a hug before demanding to see all his weapons, hoping to assess the damages and repair them before he was sent out again. Dan Feng had come rushing from treating a nasty cut on Baiheng's leg and demanded to see Yanqing's wounds. He later spent the next hour redressing everything and criticizing the handiwork of an amateur medic, stating that Yanqing could have suffered from sepsis due to the wounds not being cleaned properly.

Baiheng and Jingliu had come over later after ensuring that each other was okay. Baiheng had ordered food and was hell-bent on feeding Yanqing, saying that he had gotten so skinny in the week he was away. Jingliu, having read the report, was more than proud of her student especially his actions him severing the Wingguard's head.

After that mission, it would be another 6 months before Yanqing was sent out again. Dan Feng refuses to let Yanqing out of his sight and Yingxing and Jing Yuan agree, saying he is too young to be doing back-to-back missions like that. It totally has nothing to do with the fact that the week he was away was the most stressful week of their lives and how Yingxing was losing so much hair from the stress.

I might have gone a bit overboard with answering this but I was just so into it!

Thank you for sending me this ask!!!

[thisapplepielife]

Written for the @steddiemas challenge.

If You Only Believe

Prompt Day 7: Mall and/or Job | Word Count: 4905 | Rating: T | CW: (Past) Loss, Loneliness | Tags: AU, Future Fic, Mall Santa, Christmas, Companionship, Finding Love Again, Second Acts, Happy Ending, Steve POV

This one is also available right here on AO3.

Steve sits alone at a small table near the fountain in the center of the mall a few miles from his house. He drinks his cup of coffee and eats his mall pretzel in the near silence. Weekday mornings are often peaceful, at least this early in the day. There aren't a lot of shoppers out and about, not yet.

The only real movement is from the mall walkers, making their continuous laps, and he watches them as they go by in their sweatsuits and new walking shoes. Arms pumping far faster than their legs. 

His late wife was a mall walker, once upon a time. She's been gone for a while now, but he thinks of her here, in her color-coordinated jogging suit and smiles.

He's recently realized that he's lonely, especially as it's getting to be that time of year, when the holidays are happening in full force, and he misses her. Misses being part of a team. A couple. 

Misses love. Being loved. He still loves her, but she's gone, and he's still here. 

He has love to give, and nobody to give it to. Sure, he has his adult kids, and Robin, and he loves them all desperately, but it's not the same. To not have a romantic love, well, it's another loss he's suffered.

He's a husband, with no spouse. 

Steve's not young, but he's young for a widower. That's what everybody says, anyway. You're so young. You should get back out there. He retired early, with big plans. Then his wife died, and those plans evaporated into thin air. 

They all mean well, but he doesn't have it in him to date, not again. He wouldn't even know how to start. He's not getting on some app. Not at his age. That's just not for him. So, he comes here to the mall, several times a week, just to be around other people for a little while. To hear the bustle, the talking, the laughter that comes later in the day.

To hear and see people moving about their busy lives, the world spinning faster around him, as he sits stagnant and still. 

To see little kids running around, looking in every store window, wanting everything they see on display. His kids are grown, and there aren't any grandkids. Not yet. Maybe never, and if that's how it shakes out, that'll be okay, too. 

He just wants his kids to be happy. Wants their lives to be fulfilled in all the ways that make them happiest.

He wants to be happy, himself. And he is, most days. It's not the same, but it's a different version of happiness, and he's learned to adjust. He has Robin, but she's so far away. He's considered packing up and moving closer to her, but he can't see letting go of his home. Their home. 

Not yet.

The mall is quiet today, but it won't be that way for long. Around him, they are setting up for the mall Santa display, since Thanksgiving is over and Christas is coming, once again. They're turning off the fountain, draining it and covering it, all to make room for the stage for Santa. For all the decorations. 

They're on ladders, hanging garland and huge snowflakes from the ceiling. The speakers start playing Christmas music softly throughout the entire mall.

And Steve watches it all happen, day after day, until there's finally a full stage set up and a Santa with a line of children waiting to see him.

The quiet of the mall is gone until next year. That's okay, he's had a lot of quiet lately, and he thinks it might be nice to have a little excitement for a change.

So, Steve watches and listens from a table out of the way, as the mall Santa talks to each kid, attentive and animated. He seems to have a gift for charming even the shyest of kids into engaging with him before their time is up and their picture has been taken. 

Steve remembers a lot more crying and tears when his kids were that little, and waiting their turn to see Santa. He recalls having to bribe them to even approach the larger than life man in the red suit, just to get the picture his wife so desperately wanted for the Christmas card.

If they'd had a Santa as good as this one, all the bartering might not have been needed. These kids are flocking to him, ready to climb on his knee and tell him what they want for Christmas this year. Gone are the days of wanting footballs and dolls. Everything has a brand name, and Steve recognizes almost none of them. He's too far removed from that stage of life.

Even if it seems like only yesterday. 

But he likes to listen to the mall Santa charm the kids. Likes to hear them fall in love with the magic of Christmas that he's so heavily selling to them. 

So, Steve comes back, day after day, to the mall. Drinks his coffee. Eats his mall pretzel. Watches people. The shoppers, the mall walkers, and the entertaining man in the Santa Claus suit.

He hasn't been in a mall this often since he was a teenager working in a food court ice cream shop with Robin.

Steve gets a Cinnabon today instead of a pretzel, just for a change, for a treat. He can't eat them everyday, not at this age, but every once in a while it's nice. Steve watches as the line forms to see Santa, but when Santa comes out it's a different guy than it has been. And he's far less lively.

That's okay. 

Steve knew that it wouldn't last forever, this free entertainment that he's been getting. He doesn't know what the schedule of a mall Santa might be like, or how much it might pay. By the day? The season? Are they volunteers? Do they do one week shifts, and now that lively Santa has gone, having done his duty for the season? Steve really has no idea. He's never thought about it, honestly. Mall Santas are just part of the tapestry of Christmas. December hits, and there's a Santa in the middle of every mall in America.

Steve finishes the cinnamon roll, and tries to wipe the icing out of his mustache. He's sure it's in there, it always is. He drinks the last of his coffee, and is getting ready to stand when someone approaches his table from over his shoulder.

"Mind if I join you?" the voice asks, and Steve looks up. 

There's Santa. Well, the man that has been playing Santa during the past week, anyway. He's a little thinner out of the suit, but he still has white hair, and a matching white beard. Not to mention a truly impressive handlebar mustache. Steve guesses he assumed it was fake. The beard, the mustache. But it appears to be very real, and Steve's mustache has got nothing on the one on this man's face. He could seriously twirl it like a villain, if wanted to get a side gig playing someone a little less wholesome than Santa Claus. 

But his voice is the same. 

He's in street clothes, and all traces of his red suit are gone. His little, gold wire glasses have been replaced with thick, black frames. He looks younger this way, up close. 

"Sure," Steve says, "I think denying Santa a seat might get me put on the naughty list." 

Santa laughs, but lowers his voice. 

"Shh, I'm not Santa. Not today," the man says, hooking his thumb towards the other Santa. "Today, I'm just Eddie." 

Eddie offers Steve his hand across the table, and Steve takes it. Shaking. 

"Well, it's nice to meet you, Eddie. I'm always just Steve, no secret identities here," Steve answers, smiling at the other man. 

"And here I was hoping you were secretly Batman," Eddie teases. "And for the record, I don't think you're just anything," Eddie says, and Steve blushes. He wasn't sure his face still did that.

All it takes is a little attention from a stranger, and it's like he's never socialized a day in his life. 

"Yeah, well. You've been entertaining to watch this past week. You're very good at what you do," Steve tells him, because he's not sure if mall Santas get compliments very often. But they should. At least, Eddie should. 

"Eh, it just gives me something to do in retirement," Eddie says with a chuckle. 

"I understand that," Steve says, "I've been retired five years and I still don't know what to do with myself most days. Hence, the mall pretzels."

Eddie laughs, and it's warm and lovely. Friendly. Open. Steve leans closer to him, towards the center of the table, just to hear what he has to say better over the crying kids and hustle and bustle. His hearing isn't as good as it once was, especially with a lot of background noise.

"Is today your day off?" Steve asks, and Eddie nods. So, Steve continues, "And you just couldn't stay away from the place? Needed to scope out the competition?"

Eddie grins, "Something like that."

"Well, you're clearly better at it. Don't worry about that at all," Steve says, softly. "Way better."

"Thanks, Steve," Eddie answers, and takes a drink of his own coffee.

And they talk. About nothing. About everything. It's nice to talk to someone his own age, but that doesn't know him. To make a new friend, if only for the day.

They talk long enough that Eddie gets up and buys them another round of coffee. Something different this time from the Starbucks menu, and Steve likes it. He usually just gets black coffee. But trying something new is nice. He should branch out more often.

Later, Steve buys them lunch. Big slices of pizza, that they eat while they laugh and talk. He watches Eddie try to keep his sauce out of his white mustache and smiles. It's a universal problem, and he's got it easier than Eddie, that's for damn sure.

"Aren't you a little young to be playing Santa?" Steve asks, looking at him.

Eddie laughs, "I haven't been called young in a while. Thanks for that." 

"You know what I mean," Steve says, because they aren't young, but Santa feels old old. Not their age, old.

"I like the chance to put on a production. A show. It's been a while since I've gotten to do that. And being a mall Santa actually pays good, especially if you're a Real Beard," Eddie says, tugging on his white beard.

Steve smiles and nods, at least that's one question answered.

Eddie gets up to go to the bathroom, and when he comes back, he hands Steve a pretzel with a knowing look.

"I will not feel shame about the mall pretzels," Steve says, quoting David Rose and Eddie smiles and laughs. He gets the joke, and Steve grins.

"We could go see if the Suncoast has Bridget Jones's Diary?" Eddie offers, teasing him.

"Suncoast," Steve says with a laugh, "now, there's a name I haven't heard in a while. I'm not sure that's a thing anymore."

Eddie just smiles. But Steve's sure they've gone the way of Blockbusters at this point. Few and far between, if there are any left at all.

Put out to pasture, like he feels, a lot of the time.

But they eat their mall pretzels together, and talk about Schitt's Creek.

And they keep talking, until it's dinner time. Steve's gonna be stoved up once he stands again. Getting older is a bitch, that's for sure. Nothing moves as well or as fast as it used to, and you've just got to adapt.

They've both had to take pee breaks, age will do that to your prostate, but they keep sitting back down together, neither in a hurry to leave.

"You hungry again?" Steve asks, and Eddie nods. 

So, they debate what to get, and settle on Chinese food. They eat and talk, and it's the best day Steve's had in a long while.

When it's time to leave, they walk towards the parking lot, and when Eddie pushes open the door for him, it's dark outside. It's always a little disorienting to enter a mall during broad daylight and leave after dark. 

Steve turns to Eddie.

"Thanks for keeping me company today. I had fun." 

"I had fun, too. If you want to come later in the day tomorrow, we could always do it again after my shift on the sleigh is over? If that works for your schedule." 

Steve nods, because he doesn't have a schedule, not anymore, and that sounds great. He'd love to spend more time with Eddie. 

So he does. Everyday he shows up, and watches Eddie be Santa for a while, and then waits for him to change clothes afterwards to meet up with him. Then they eat together. They're working their way around the entire food court, trying every stall at least once. Some things have been good, some others not so much, but they're definitely having a good time. 

Steve's having fun, and maybe making a new friend.

He learns that Eddie is divorced. He had a husband, and now he doesn't. Steve understands. He had a wife, and now he doesn't. Different losses, but they've both been sent out adrift, alone, after years of having a partner by their side.

That's a universal feeling, he's pretty sure.

After they eat, sometimes they sit and have coffee, and other days they'll walk through the mall, window shopping. They discuss the stuff they see, the stuff they remember from their childhoods that are long gone, now. They talk about the state of the world, and how they don't know how to fix it.

And, as Christmas approaches, they stop window shopping, and do some regular shopping. Steve buys gifts for Robin, for his kids, for his mailman. He stops at the Hickory Farms kiosk and buys a meat and cheese gift set to drop off at his former office. 

Eddie buys things, too. He doesn't have kids, but he has friends he talks about. He buys a tin of popcorn from a kiosk, for his weekly poker game. 

And it's the best month Steve's had in a very long time.

"I have a mall friend," Steve says into the phone, sitting down in his recliner to talk to Robin. They talk a lot, but they always make time on Wednesday nights. It's been that way for decades, a constant. Tradition.

"What's a mall friend?" Robin asks, immediately curious. 

"A friend at the mall," he answers, like, obviously. If he had an aquarium friend, he would have said so.

"Are they a real or imaginary friend?" she questions, sounding suspicious. 

"A little of both," he teases, then adds, "he's the mall Santa." 

"You're friends with the mall Santa?" she repeats, disbelief in her voice. 

"Yeah? He's a real person under the red suit, you know. His name is Eddie." 

"Are you one of his elves? Are you sitting on his lap?" she teases. 

"No!" he says, too loud and too fast. 

Goddammit. 

Now she's gonna make it into a thing. It's not a thing, not really. But she's never letting this go now, and he's the only one to blame. He shouldn't have said anything at all. Eddie and him don't talk outside of their afternoons in the mall. They haven't exchanged numbers, or made any plans.

Eddie is his mall friend. That's the most accurate description.

"Steve…" she trails off.

"I like him, of course I like him, but it's not that easy. The kids aren't ready for me to date anybody else, let alone a man. Let alone a mall Santa," Steve says, rationalizing this situation.

"Your kids would love for you to be happy. You know that, and I know that," Robin says. "And in what world would they care that he's a man? I know the kids you raised. They love me and their Aunt Penny. So, that's just an excuse you're making."

Steve makes a non-committal sound.

"Steve…"

"We aren't like that, Robin. We're just mall friends. That's it."

"Well, what happens when Christmas is over, dingus? Then what? Is he also the mall Easter Bunny?"

Steve smiles at the thought. He'd never considered that to be a possibility, and now it's all he can think about. Eddie in that giant bunny suit. Huge, pastel polka dot bow tie around his neck.

"He's not the Easter Bunny," he answers. 

"Send me a pic of him, I need to see this Santa," Robin demands.

"I don't have a picture of him. Why would I have a picture of him?" Steve asks.

"Well, you could have a professional one taken with him," Robin suggests.

"Yeah, and get banned from the mall for life for being a weird pervert? No thanks, Rob," Steve says.

"I'm just saying, if you like him, tell him that."

"It's not like that. We're friends. Mall friends," he says, again.

"So you've said," Robin says, sarcastically, and he changes the subject. It doesn't want to talk about Eddie, the mall Santa friend, right now.

Christmas Eve is bustling in the mall, full of last-minute shoppers rushing around to get everything they need before the stores shutter for the night.

Steve watches as Eddie pays attention to all the kids that are making their list minute wishes known. Their stressed parents nearby, worrying how they're going to make these last requests happen with so little time left in the shopping season.

Eddie stays until the last kid has been greeted, and then disappears into the back, only to reappear later, Eddie. Not Santa. 

They eat at the last stall they haven't tried yet, a little stand slinging cheesesteaks. Steve's gonna have heartburn from the peppers and onions afterwards, surely, but they're really good.

Steve's not ready for the month to end, but it's time to go. Things end all the time before you're ready. Steve knows that, intimately.

"What are your plans for tonight?" Eddie asks, as they make their way out of the mall for the last time before Christmas is over for another year. It's a weirdly bittersweet feeling. Steve's enjoyed Christmas again, in a way he hasn't since, before.

"Not much. My kids won't be here until tomorrow. You?" 

"Nothing much on my end, either." 

"Well, it was a lot of fun watching you be Santa, Eddie," Steve says, pausing by his car. 

"It was fun hanging out with you, too, Steve." 

And they part ways, like they have every night before this one. With little fanfare.

Steve sits in his car and the entire drive home he wonders if he should have offered Eddie his phone number or email address. Something, anything, so they could have stayed in touch. But they've spent a few weeks together, and that's never come up. Eddie would have surely offered or asked, if he wanted that kind of contact. 

So, Steve is just grateful for what this was. A temporary friendship, when he needed one desperately. 

"Merry Christmas Eve," Robin says, and Steve settles into his chair. 

"Backatcha," he answers, stirring his cup of coffee. He bought some fancy creamer after Eddie turned him on to all the different kinds of coffee out there. 

"So, how's your mall friend?" Robin asks.

"Fine, his last Santa shift was today," Steve says.

"...and?"

"And what? Christmas is over," Steve says, sipping his coffee.

"Steve! Please tell me you got his number, or he took yours. Something. Anything!" she shouts, and he sips his coffee, trying to ignore her outburst.

But his stomach is tight. He's pretty sure he fucked up. He should have done one of those things, and now it's too late. Santa is gone for the year, and has taken Eddie with him.

"Seriously? You've been dating him for a month and you just, what? Left?"

He scoffs, "I haven't been dating him for a month. I'm not dating him at all. If hanging out with someone is the metric for dating, I have bad news about our relationship."

She laughs, but then is quiet, "I wish you'd have done something to keep him around, Steve. Friend, or more."

"Yeah," Steve says, "me too, I think."

Steve doesn't go back to the mall the day after Christmas. Or the day after that. He doesn't want to know that Eddie's not there.

But, on the third day, he goes and buys his coffee and has his mall pretzel in hand, when he spots the back of Eddie's head sitting at a table. 

Steve smiles and makes a beeline towards him, coming up to him from behind him, already talking as he rounds his shoulder, "Hey, I didn't expect-" he starts, only to realize it isn't Eddie at all. "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you were someone else." 

"Who? Santa Claus?" the familiar voice asks, full of joy. 

Steve does a double take. The voice is Eddie, but the face…

Eddie runs his hand over his clean shaven cheeks, grinning up at Steve. 

"It takes six months to grow out, and about six minutes to shave off," Eddie says. 

Holy shit.

Steve laughs, and sits down across from him, just staring.

"That is one helluva transformation," Steve says, continuing to stare. 

"Were you only friends with me for my badass beard and mustache? Are you a Santa groupie? Is that what's happening here?" Eddie teases, his eyes soft. The eyes, those are the same.

"You got me. The red suit does it for me, and I always choose all my friends by their facial hair. It's a strict requirement."

Eddie laughs, and it's nice to see so much more of his face. He's handsome. More than Steve even realized.

And they talk, and eat, and it's the same as it was all the days prior.

"Do you play poker?" Eddie asks, and Steve nods. At least in theory. It's been a while. 

"You have plans tonight? It's my weekly game with some friends. The more the merrier, if you want to come?" 

Steve should say no, shouldn't let Eddie pity him. But he finds himself nodding at the invitation, all the same. 

"Great," Eddie says, seeming delighted, "let me text you the address. And that way you'll have my number, if you get lost."

And just like that, they aren't just mall friends. They're phone friends now, too.

Steve nervously walks up to the door, but he doesn't have to even ring the bell, because Eddie is swinging open the front glass door with a smile.

"Hey, glad you made it," Eddie says, ushering him inside. 

He hears chatter, and laughter, and it's warm inside. In the dining room, at the table, there are three women holding hands of cards. 

One of them hops up when she sees him, and the rest follow. She's short as can be, but smiling up at him. 

"This is Di," Eddie says, "and that is Mel and Carla," Eddie adds, pointing at each woman. "This is Steve."

"Hi, it's so nice to meet you," Steve says, and he had assumed Eddie's poker game was with men, but now he realizes that was a stupid assumption to make. 

They all fawn over him for a minute, which makes him feel silly. But they seem fun. 

"Okay, you old hens, leave him alone," Eddie says with a laugh, and puts his hand on the small of Steve's back. Guiding him towards the basement stairs.

Eddie leads him down into the basement of the house, and oh, there are three other older men sitting around the green felt table. Eddie makes introductions. 

"Gareth, Jeff and Charles," Eddie says, pointing at each man.

"Don't you get him calling me Charles, you asshole," the largest of the three men says. 

Eddie laughs, rocking on his feet. Seeing Eddie so giddy makes Steve smile. He's ornery, and Steve's a little smitten.

"What should I call you, then?" Steve asks the man who clearly doesn't want to be called Charles.

"Goodie," they all say in unison. 

"Okay, Goodie it is. I'm Steve," and they all nod politely. 

Steve sits down and is dealt in. 

"Did you survive the welcome wagon?" Jeff asks, looking over at Steve. Steve smiles and nods.

"They have to play upstairs, because they are way too cutthroat for us. They've been put in a permanent timeout," Eddie says, and that's a hilarious thought.

Steve looks around the table. He wonders what it's like to have this many people around you all the time. It must be nice, even if it's only one night a week. To be in a full house, again.

"So, you're Eddie's pretzel friend?" Gareth asks from his right side, passing Steve a bowl full of mall kiosk popcorn, and Steve laughs.

The mall friend and the pretzel friend. They really are a pair.

"That's me," Steve says with a laugh, and looks at the cards in front of him. He's been dealt a pretty good hand, he realizes.

And it's fun, and easy, this poker game. They give each other shit, and don't seem to be on their best behavior just because there's a guest at the table, and Steve likes that. Loves that this is just a normal poker game, and he slides into it like he's always been here. He might not know them very well, but watching Eddie, he realizes he does know him. This Eddie is the same Eddie he's spent hours with, in that mall.

Steve lays down his next bet, eats his popcorn, and makes some more new friends, hopefully.

He wins, and he loses, and it's fun. All of it.

When the night is over, he's glad he came. Really glad.

"Next week is casino night," Gareth says, "so, get ready."

"Casino night?" Steve asks, and he's picturing them all sitting around in green dealer visors, spinning a plastic roulette wheel.

"All of us go to the casino right outside town for the night. Eat a nice dinner together, gamble a little, have a few drinks, and then we stay in the attached hotel. It's a lot of fun," Eddie says, "you should definitely come with us."

Steve doesn't want to crash their party, especially one that is obviously so couple-based, but with the way Eddie is smiling at him, Steve just nods. It does sound like fun.

At the end of the night, Eddie walks Steve out to his car that's parked along the curb. Eddie stuffs his hands in his coat pockets, and rocks on his feet, like he's nervous. Steve just watches him, curious.

"Thanks for inviting me, that was fun," Steve says, and it was. He likes Eddie's friends, he thinks.

"Of course, you're welcome every week. Same time, same place," Eddie rambles a little and Steve smiles. He might just take him up on that offer. It might be nice to have something to look forward to every week. Wednesdays are for Robin, but maybe Thursdays can be for Eddie and poker.

"I might just do that," Steve says, smiling at Eddie.

"And I hope you'll come to the casino with us, too," Eddie says, and Steve nods. He thinks he will.

And then they fall into a soft quietness, just looking at each other. Eddie looks like he has something to say, but he's just standing there, frozen. So, Steve reaches out, and squeezes Eddie's arm through his coat sleeve, "Thanks for inviting me."

And then, Eddie is finally talking.

"If I'm reading this wrong, just tell me and I'll shut up, but would you be interested in getting dinner together some time? You know, outside of the mall?" Eddie asks, and he looks far too nervous for a man that's lived nearly this many decades.

"You're not reading it wrong at all," Steve says, smiling at him, "I'd really like that a lot."

Eddie grins, and it's still funny to see that now that Steve can see his whole mouth. It's a great mouth. With full lips that are just begging to be kissed. 

But Steve hasn't kissed anybody new in, goddamn, what? Over thirty years? Even the thought of doing so is a little daunting. 

He doesn't have time to dither long though, because Eddie steps forward, and his intent is clear, so Steve leans into it. Into Eddie. Into the moment. 

It's chaste, and brief, but Steve feels warm inside. His heart is racing, and he didn't realize that was something that could still happen at his advanced age and not just be the signs of an imminent heart attack. 

They part nearly as quickly as they joined, but Eddie is smiling, right up close. So Steve kisses him again, a little longer this time, and yeah, this is what he's been longing for, he suddenly realizes. This kind of connection. He didn't know he could be lucky enough to get it more than once in a lifetime. But he's realizing that he can have a second act. He just needed a little intermission to get his bearings, to adjust to his new reality, but right now, with Eddie, he definitely feels like that is possible. 

Anything is possible, if you only believe in it. 

And Steve, he believes.

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @steddiemas and follow along!

[sepublic]

I do wish they brought back Al’s identity crisis when the Homunculi’s nature as failed resurrections, and their imperfect memories, was brought to light. Because in 2003, Al’s crisis is also foreshadowing to this, so it’d come full circle.

I understand if the writers felt like they would’ve been retreading old ground in doing so. But there’s so much potential in Alphonse considering the possibility that he’s a homunculus soul attached to a suit of armor, and the kicker comes in meeting a homunculus who wants to be bound to armor, just like Al, because of Al!

It doesn’t matter if Edward intended/realized this (which would absolve him in Al’s eyes at least), it’s possible that Alphonse genuinely died from the transmutation of Sloth, given his body was obliterated completely. And so what Ed did was create a second homunculus, attempt a second human transmutation, but because he didn’t have the materials to make a new body (or didn’t consider using Sloth as those materials), he had to bind the new soul to armor for it to be tangible.

Of course, Alphonse has memories that Ed doesn’t; Does this mean that both him and the Homunculi are real? Or does it just mean that somewhere within the Gate is the original, and the Gate copied their memories to produce a homunculus? If Alphonse is real then so is Sloth, meaning Edward can’t kill her. Or maybe they have to anyway, for the sake of self-defense because Sloth would still be in denial of her past regardless.

What would it mean for Lust? Would she believe Alphonse is real, and thus consider herself that way, without a doubt? Would she still desire her original body, regardless of an identity crisis? Tbf I’d hate to have been literally whitewashed, and would indeed want to reconnect with my community.

It’s sad because Alphonse has a third party in Winry that he can cross-reference his memories with to affirm he’s the original. But the isolated relationship the Homunculi have with Dante makes it basically impossible to do that; Lust might’ve had the chance if she got to talk with Scar about it, at least. Envy seems to consider himself the original regardless. The rest don’t seem to have much anxiety, tbh…

But with Sloth? She might want to cross-reference, if only to prove to the Elrics she’s not real. But what if she is? What if the verification proves it? They’d never stop harassing her either way; Either she’s their mom and better go back to it, or she’s not real and Edward does what he does in canon.

Mayhaps memories don’t mean much if Homunculi are born with different personalities, because nature vs nurture, two people with the exact same experiences might choose differently because of genetic personality traits. Or maybe it’s proof that Trisha actually felt this way all along, and this is the real her.

Trisha had kids at a really young age, maybe she regretted committing to that life so quickly (or even, at all). That could’ve been a secret she took to the grave… Only to not be so secret after all. Maybe Sloth felt empowered to say how she truly felt by pretending she wasn’t Trisha anyway, because if she said that while thinking of herself as Trisha, it’d mean betraying her sons and she loves them too much to do that either. It’s complicated.

But, back to Alphonse; Given 2003 was always planned to be divergent and the writers did work to establish this early on with Sloth herself, it makes me think that I dunno. They could’ve pushed Al’s identity crisis to this later part of the story, if they wanted to avoid repeating the same conflict? But if you apply Al’s proof that he’s real, then it might answer the ambiguity of the Homunculi and thus ruin that uncertainty.

That, or you’d have to end the series implying that the Al in flashbacks is dead, and the one we see is a different character. When Al gets his body back, he doesn’t retain memories of everything that happened when he was a suit of armor; What if Ed had created a clone the whole time, while the real Alphonse was trapped beyond the gate? And that clone used up his soul as part of the Philosopher’s Stone to save Ed, who then unwittingly brought back the real Alphonse? That could be too bleak, even for the writers of 2003. Obviously Conqueror of Shamballa clears it up but man.

[screamting]

Do you have any examples in mind for the Alfred as Bruce's handler idea? What would be the sort of thing that's weird? Because keeping him up-to-date on politics and taking care of his diet, or even talking him down from fear gas attacks doesn't seem that weird to me. Especially with how their lives are going. What specifically are you thinking of? This is such an interesting take, would love to hear more about this

"With how their lives are going" is sort of the point. A butler is a household manager, so like yes, there's some overlap with controlling and organizing lots of people-- but like, not their boss? In a smaller household butlers might do things like take on valet and housekeeping duties, which is probably what happened after the household downsized after Martha and Thomas died. That's also probably when he went from Mr Pennyworth to Alfred.

And people know it's a weird situation. Like. Okay. So the one potential relative the Waynes may have had (Jacob Kane) is too young to take Bruce in, or Martha and Thomas just fuckin hate their other living relatives and specifically write that if anything happens to us Bruce goes to Alfred, or Bruce goes to a relative for like 2 months and it Does Not Work and either Bruce or Alfred bribe a judge to make Alfred his guardian. Lots of options, all of them A Weird Situation Everybody Knows About.

I think partly because of trying to maintain normalcy in Bruce's life (and because of his own emotional issues) Alfred does hold onto the butler/valet thing maybe a little harder than might have been ideal, but if he dresses Bruce he's just lying clothes out for him on the bed or helping him get dressed up for important events. There's no point for Alfred to drive him around-- by all rights Alfred should have his own driver-- and they should have a cook and housemaid and maybe they have Dory like in the batman 2022, but it's still a weird thing to be, essentially, raised by the staff.

(I think maybe that's a separate point but I do think it should play more into the conception of Brucie as a person. He's not just comfortably empty headed and kind to 'the help' because he's stupid and never had parents to teach him how a rich man ought to behave. He's that way because he was raised by the help. Not even in the normal way where you pay/kidnap a nanny to raise your kids instead of her own. Just straight up the butler and the housekeeper and the family physician. [Bruce knows Leslie's a surgeon but his association is still like, 'ah, yes, my pediatrician who showed up to all my birthdays whether I wanted one or not.'])

The thing is that when this is happening as Bruce is a kid, it's weird, but like, it's normal too. They get a closer relationship than child and butler usually do. It's normal for a younger kid to not control his meals too much but once he's an older teen he makes requests for dinner and it happens. He starts growing independent and comes to Alfred less for advice, sometimes making him worry, but he's becoming an adult and soon he won't need Alfred at all!

...and then Bruce runs off with a few hundred thousand dollars in cash and vanishes for years without a word.

When he comes back he's got this absolutely deranged idea in his head about going out and violently making the city a place people are afraid to commit crimes. Sure petty theft and carjacking, but no: he's going to make mafiosos afraid. He's going to very specifically make them feel unsafe in their own homes. He's going to terrorize every crooked cop and politician until quitting and struggling for the rest of their lives sounds like a better option than continuing to take an extra 10k home a month.

....so anyway, Alfred unfortunately loves this kid too much to throw him into Arkham, and it seems like he'd be pretty hard to wrestle now after going through all that assassin training.

So early Alfred takes on what eventually sort of gets outsourced to Oracle, because even if he hasn't been around it since Martha and Thomas were alive he remembers more about upper crust society behavior and Bruce needs to nail it down. So it's not just "here's the summary of the daily newspaper master bruce" it's "this is Julia Danvers she's the only heiress to an oil field fortune and has an allergy to shellfish. She's sort of into environmentalism but isn't really thinking it through and any real complicated solutions that would cause damage to the business make her feel like the end of her family line, which of course ends with a woman and they're going to blame her for being a woman and ruining the business for everyone else. So when you talk to her, here is what I think you should do..."

Bruce doesn't pick his meals anymore because he barely eats so Alfred makes a protein shake with so many other added nutrients that you do have to ease yourself onto them unless you want to absolutely annihilate your gut and suffer in the bathroom for three days. Of course, Bruce never had to think about this, because Alfred did the easing on himself by varying the inputs over the course of a month gradually with the rest of his meals that were easy digestables.

Talking down from fear gas isn't something they plan for but it is something that like: Bruce is seeing a monster. It is telling him the terrible things it will do.

It is using Alfred's voice, so Bruce has to believe there's a good reason for it to do those things, and gives himself over to it.

It's not just that Alfred puts aside what he'd carefully raised and hoped for to ruthlessly try and keep alive what he has. It's that Bruce knows he's being handled, and allows it.

[olympeline]

I can see why The Parent Trap became such a staple AU for FACE family FrUK. It’s just too good to resist 😍 Here’s my version:

Francis and Arthur meet when they start attending the same London university: Francis to study fashion, Arthur journalism. Over the next four years they have a classic “enemies to lovers” relationship. They’re a couple by the time they graduate, but an immature and stormy one. Lots of fights, lots of near break ups, lots of making up. They get married early and start living together early, which was probably a mistake as neither were ready for it. They move to Paris (part of the reason for early marriage was visa based) and live together in a tiny, shitty apartment. Lots of up and downs, but life is generally good. Their relationship slowly improves, they grow together and stop fighting so much

Then they have their first real difference of opinion beyond just a spat: Francis has always wanted kids and wants to have them young. Arthur was more unsure, preferring to wait until they were older and settled. Deep down he’s afraid of losing Francis, and so gives in sooner than he should. Francis notices, but lies to himself about the depth of Arthur’s discomfort because he wants children so badly. Again, the immaturity and lack of communication hobbles them. If this problem had come up later, say in their early thirties rather than twenties, they could have handled it and compromised. But it didn’t, so a kid is on the way

Either this is set a little in the future, or Arthur is still his wizard self, but by science or magic they have a pair of twins. Born by surrogate, but Alfred and Matthew are biologically theirs. Alfred resembles Arthur more, Matthew takes after Francis. It doesn’t matter; both dads adore each baby so much it hurts

Unfortunately, this doesn’t stop things getting tough straight away, not in the least because they were only expecting one baby. They planned for one, budgeted for one, then got double. They might have coped, but then Francis’s fledgling fashion business gets an irresistible offer from a company in Quebec. Arthur really doesn’t want to leave France, but grudgingly agrees. They move when the boys are barely toddlers and the stress gets even worse. Moving to a new continent with twin babies and stretched finances? Cracks are starting to appear in the marriage for real by this point

Still, Francis and Arthur cope and hold their relationship together. They’re having problems, but neither wants to split up. They still love each other dearly. Also they have kids now. Even if the love had died, they’d want to try and make it work for their sake. They struggle on for a while and keep their heads above water. Both are too stubborn and proud to get therapy because that would mean admitting how bad things were getting between them.

Then, bombshell: Arthur gets a huge opportunity…but it would mean moving to New York for a year. And after everything, this is the straw that breaks the camel’s back. Francis doesn’t want to leave Canada because it could have a bad effect on his growing business. Also the boys would be starting kindergarten soon and Francis doesn’t want to uproot them again. Arthur argues he already did the same for Francis, and they’d be back soon anyway. And a boost to Arthur’s career would help set them up for the future, so Alfred and Matthew would benefit in the long run. They can’t agree and things get heated as the deadline for Arthur to accept approaches. Both accuse the other of being selfish and unreasonable. It snowballs from there. Long simmering resentments boil over. They can’t communicate well enough to get through this. One of them leaves to stay with a friend, then just never comes back to live at their apartment. Soon they’re living separate lives and only communicating about the boys. It’s unbearable, unsustainable. Break up. Divorce. The court awards each of them one twin. Arthur takes Alfred and moves to NYC, Francis stays in Quebec with Matthew.

Years pass, the twins start to grow up. There’s so much hurt and bitterness that communication between Francis and Arthur completely breaks down before the boys are old enough to remember their other parent. By the time they start elementary school, it’s total scorched earth. Francis and Arthur just refuse to talk about each other. Alfred bombards Arthur with questions, but his dad is a stone wall. Gentler Matthew gives up more quickly, but that doesn’t mean he’s any less curious. Eventually even Alfred has to give in. The twins accept that their “other dad” will always be a mystery

Life settles. Francis’s fashion label blooms and he and Matthew live a charmed life as Quebec upper crust. Meanwhile, Arthur gets work at a prestigious newspaper and writes historical nonfiction novels in his spare time. Alfred goes to public school and is a loud, joyous, ball of endless energy. Matthew goes to private school and is sweet, academic and well behaved, but so shy.

Both dads watch their son grow with pride. They seem happy, and sometimes they are, but in their private moments, the pain is still there. Francis is better at hiding his emotions than Arthur, while Matthew notices more than Alfred. So each twin knows their father is wistful. Thet can guess it’s about their “other dad.” Alfred and Matthew try to cheer up their dads in their own ways, but the hurt remains

Francis and Arthur never have any other long term relationships. Francis has no trouble finding partners, but nothing sticks. Matthew is secretly glad, then feels bad about it. He wants his papa to be happy but the thought of a stepfather/mother scares him. Meanwhile, Arthur’s dating life is a disaster and after a few years he just gives up on finding new love. Alfred is fine with them being a family of two. He likes having his dad’s attention focused on him rather than some lame boyfriend

That all changes when, after a night of commiseration and far too much whiskey, Arthur ends up in bed with Antonio. Antonio is a fellow immigrant and friend of a work friend, who happens to be going through his own disastrous love life problems. They met through Romano, who works at Arthur’s newspaper as a caustic restaurant critic. Arthur reminds Antonio of Romano, Antonio reminds Arthur of Francis. They’re both lonely and needy. It should have been just a one night stand, but they cling to each other and start a relationship (wrong tsundere, Antonio!) Romantically it’s not good and everyone can see there’s no real spark. But Arthur and Antonio’s hearts are raw by this point and they dive into denial and start living together. Antonio is good with kids and Arthur thinks two parents will make for a better life for his handful of a son. Alfred likes Antonio, but he doesn’t think he should be his stepdad. Nevertheless, Arthur and Antonio get engaged but never set a date

Life settles, life goes on. Arthur starts sending Alfred to summer camp, which he loves. Francis gets a school report that Matthew is a lovely, polite boy, but he could do with trying to be a little more extroverted and making more friends. Francis decides to send him to a highly reviewed summer camp just across the border

At long last, Alfred and Matthew finally meet, and…! Instantly loathe each other. Total antipathy. Alfred sees Mattie as a boring, sissy, goody-two-shoes who just wants to spoil everyone’s fun. Matthew sees Alfred as a loud, obnoxious, dumb, jerk jock who doesn’t care what happens to anyone else so long as he gets to do what he wants. An intense rivalry begins. Neither boy realises how much their lives are about to change

(This is getting really long so stay tuned for part 2! (´ε｀ )♡)