#anyway yes we all agree. correct???

[engagemy-others]

Okay we all agree that in the "good" universe Jayce goes on his house arrest but still meets Viktor and they go out and date and eventually end up together. and then Viktor goes on to become a professor and Jayce takes over the hammer business and also takes up making mobility aids and medical devices to help better lives (because magic is not the only way to do so.)

and they're doing pretty okay for themselves.

[lunar-years]

Chappell’s thoughts on the election sound a heck of lot like many of the takes I see daily on social media in fandom spaces and leftist spaces and on my personal accounts from people I went to high school/college with etc. etc. and I actually think it’s helpful that she’s giving voice to the thoughts a lot of people are clearly having and acknowledging a fairly prominent point of view amongst a portion of young voters whilst STILL ultimately saying she’s going to vote (for Kamala!) and emphasizing the importance of local elections. Like, I personally don’t agree with her stance but many people do and many in that group are the ones going around saying they’re not voting entirely or trying to get us all to vote Jill fucking Stein. Maybe what Chappell is saying will register with some of that group? Maybe they will get out and vote for Kamala despite not agreeing with all of her policies and viewpoints? Which is…a positive thing? What am I missing here 😭

[mazojo]

Maybe we consume media differently because I do it in a slay girlboss gaslight gatekeep way and you do it as a a hater

[wordiestwyrm]

people should start inventing their own numerologies and comparing notes. slash s r s

[vaspider]

While I'm writing things that I've been intending to write for a while... one of the things that I think that a lot of people who haven't been involved in like... banking or corporate shenaniganry miss about why our economy is its current flavor of total fuckery is the concept of "fiduciary duty to shareholders."

"Why does every corporation pursue endless growth?" Fiduciary duty to shareholders.

"Why do corporations treat workers the way they do?" Fiduciary duty to shareholders.

"Why do corporations make such bass-ackwards decisions about what's 'good for' the company?" Fiduciary duty to shareholders.

The legal purpose of a corporation with shareholders -- its only true purpose -- is the generation of revenue/returns for shareholders. Period. That's it. Anything else it does is secondary to that. Sustainability of business, treatment of workers, sustainability and quality of product, those things are functionally and legally second to generating revenue for shareholders. Again, period, end of story. There is no other function of a corporation, and all of its extensive legal privileges exist to allow it to do that.

"But Spider," you might say, "that sounds like corporations only exist in current business in order to extract as much money and value as possible from the people actually doing the work and transfer it up to the people who aren't actually doing the work!"

Yes. You are correct. Thank you for coming with me to that realization. You are incredibly smart and also attractive.

You might also say, "but Spider, is this a legal obligation? Could those running a company be held legally responsible for failing their obligations if they prioritize sustainability or quality of product or care of workers above returns for shareholders?"

Yes! They absolutely can! Isn't that terrifying? Also you look great today, you're terribly clever for thinking about these things. The board and officers of a corporation can be held legally responsible to varying degrees for failing to maximize shareholder value.

And that, my friends, is why corporations do things that don't seem to make any fucking sense, and why 'continuous growth' is valued above literally anything else: because it fucking has to be.

If you're thinking that this doesn't sound like a sustainable economic model, you're not alone. People who are much smarter than both of us, and probably nearly as attractive, have written a proposal for how to change corporate law in order to create a more sensible and sustainable economy. This is one of several proposals, and while I don't agree with all of this stuff, I think that reading it will really help people as a springboard to understanding exactly why our economy is as fucked up as it is, and why just saying 'well then don't pursue eternal growth' isn't going to work -- because right now it legally can't. We'd need to change -- and we can change -- the laws around corporate governance.

This concept of 'shareholder primacy' and the fiduciary duty to shareholders is one I had to learn when I was getting my securities licenses, and every time I see people confusedly asking why corporations try to grow grow grow in a way that only makes sense if you're a tumor, I sigh and think, 'yeah, fiduciary duty to shareholders.'

(And this is why Emet and I have refused to seek investors for NK -- we might become beholden to make decisions which maximize investor return, and that would get in the way of being able to fully support our people and our values and say the things we started this company to say.)

Anyway, you should read up on these concepts if you're not familiar. It's pretty eye-opening.

[deadsetobsessions]

Danny always knew tax evasion ran in his veins. His parents hadn’t been the most… morally sound of people, and less so as ecto-scientists.

He just didn’t think their lessons would ever result in a criminal empire that spanned the entire city and then some. Danny hadn’t seen it coming. His parents definitely wouldn’t have.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Wayne. Mr. Fox.”

Danny ‘the Phantom’ Fenton sat down across from a rather tense looking (to Danny’s enhanced senses, anyways) Brucie Wayne and his right hand, Lucius Fox. He smiled pleasantly, matching Brucie’s vacant smile with that touch of Midwest suburban mother smile.

With his acquisition of multiple Gotham companies, his rather newly established Fentom Co. became one of the largest holding companies in Gotham, the first being Wayne Enterprises and the second being Drake Industries. After months of constantly working his butt off while fending off assassins, reforming Gotham’s slums and cleaning up some of the streets, and taking care of his nest of street kids, Danny garnered enough power to even stand close to Wayne Enterprises in terms of financial powers.

The topic of this meeting was, of course, the proposed merger of Wayne Enterprises’ Medical R&D division with Fentom Co.’s pharmaceutical department. Usually, Wayne Enterprises wouldn’t even consider such an offer, as their Medical R&D division was the most well funded and least likely to be part of a Rogue’s scheme- and therefore most beloved- department of the same nature in Gotham. However, Danny had something the other offers didn’t.

Blackmail.

His overly polite smile widened as Bruce’s mask twitched. His eyes slid over to Lucius Fox.

“It’s an honor to meet you, sir. I’ve heard much about your genius in… research and development.”

By that, Danny meant that he knew Lucius Fox helped develop Batman’s tech.

He did a lot of stalking that week. It felt rather… invasive, even if he did get a bunch of juicy secrets.

You know what they say: dead men tell no tales… but halfas are generally blabbermouths.

“Is that so? It is a pleasure to meet you as well, Mr. Fenton.” The man quickly glanced between the youngsters, accurately predicting that this might have something to do with Bruce’s active nightlife.

“Yes, it is such a pleasure to meet you.”

Wow, Danny didn’t think he’d ever heard anyone sound both so perky and dead inside at the same time, except for Susan at Gotham High’s bake sale.

Bruce wishes he could be a Susan. He’s at best a Becky.

“Will you be staying, Mr. Fox? You’re the head of the R&D department, correct?”

“Ah, yes-”

“Oh, Lucius! I think you had an appointment with the finance department right now! I heard Sally talk about it, you know!”

Lucius Fox sent an unreadable look at Bruce before rallying.

“Oh, it must have slipped my mind. My apologies, Mr. Fenton, it seems as though I can not skip this appointment.”

“That’s alright. I suppose it gives you… plausible deniability… should things go wrong, haha!” Danny allowed his smile to widen a little further than natural. Bruce tensed but Lucius Fox simply politely smiled and left the room.

Ignorance is bliss and all that, Danny amusedly thought.

As the door shut with a click, Bruce dropped the vacant Brucie smile and sighed.

“What do you want,” he gritted out. Danny wasn’t about to let that slide, not after he spent the better part of this month wrangling Bruce’s problem children.

“Ah, it must be because I’m from the Midwest, Brucie, but where I come from, we value these things called manners.”

You uneducated jerk, he doesn’t say.

Danny leaned back in his chair, loosening his smile into something relaxed and sharp.

“…” Oh, boy, Danny could just hear the other man’s blood pressure rising. “What is the purpose of your visit, Mr. Fenton?”

“Relax, Brucie,” Danny sing-songed in a non-relaxing way. “I’m just here to discuss a possible merger that I’m sure you’ll agree to, and give you a couple of updates on your… wayward bird.”

He heard Bruce take a slow, controlled breath. “Very well. Where. Would. You. Like. To. Start.”

Danny ignored the gritted out sentence. He passed a contract to Bruce, who took it like he was handling a live bomb.

“Here’s the proposal, Mr. Wayne. Please, look it over.”

He watched as Bruce looked over the contract with an eagle eye before lowering it, scrutinizing Danny.

“This is… very fair.”

Danny raised an eyebrow. Of course it was fair. Danny wasn’t interested in exploiting the Waynes, despite them being very able to afford it.

He’d brought fifty manufacturing sites for pharmaceuticals, and offered up a building where both companies could send their workers. He provided top notch security- that definitely didn’t have any talons on staff, what were they talking about?- that came from his own security division. Granted, most of them were reformed and trained goons, but hey, creating jobs can only help Gotham’s economy and help break the cycle of poverty, right? Guaranteed by the Wayne name and, most importantly, uncompromised medicine that was accessible to everyone would be a damn good start. He’d also have Penguin’s empire to distribute it to those who couldn’t make it to a clinic or a store, and there were plans in there to work with and establish contracts with Gotham’s welfare department. Well… once Danny finished replacing them with people who wouldn’t try to take a cut of the funds and actually cared about the people. He was thinking… the multitudes of poor grad students and parents that need income. He’s in the process of building childcare centers and…

It’s a good thing he managed to save money from the taxes (thank you, Gotham’s morally ambiguous tax experts that were in desperate need for clients! He could do it himself but having a team of accountants at the ready was seriously so helpful.) because ancients knows the government weren’t about to step into Gotham and help the people here. He needs so much money to pull all of this shit off and a lot of it has to be clean.

Danny inwardly sighed and marked another thing onto his to do list.

Make money laundering fronts.



“Of course, Mr. Wayne. You didn’t think I’d come in here demanding money, did you?”

“I considered it.”

“I am, in fact, trying to help Gotham. You might not agree with my methods, but I’d rather not damage Wayne Enterprises when it’s doing so much to help the people.”

Ugh, he was doing too much work. Danny just wanted to- hah- chill at home and read bed time stories to his kids.

Bruce Wayne, the specific blend between Brucie and Batman, regarded him silently. Danny felt like he went up a few notches in the respect ladder.

Nice.

“You’re a criminal.”

“Says the man in the bat-suit breaking into places and assaulting people.”

Bruce’s hands spasmed around the contract. Danny smiled at him, taking a sip of the coffee they’d prepared. Oo, nice!

“Ah, I heard you’re adopting- pardon, fostering- Tim Drake. Getting empty nest syndrome, Brucie?” He slipped back into using Bruce’s first name. The proposal was formal. This… was very much not.

“What about it?”

“That’s very kind of you. Speaking of which, well, of your birds, I was wondering if you remembered what I asked you to do.” Danny continued, not giving Bruce a chance to reply. “Didn’t I ask for you to keep your birds in line, Brucie?”

The CEO straightened even further, form filling out to be Batman’s imposing figure. “I did.”

“No, you didn’t. Do you know where your charge is, right now? No, not the formerly dead one,” Danny tilted his head, smile shrinking.

“Don’t you dare do anything to Tim. I swear, if you even lay a hand on a strand of his hair, I’ll-”

“Sit your Armani clad ass down, Bruce.” Danny snapped. “Your son’s in your office. I don’t harm children, and your assumptions are deeply insulting. Threaten me again, Bruce, and I’ll make sure you know exactly how much I know about your birds, your cousin, and the commissioner’s daughter.”

Bruce snarled but leashed his anger just enough to sit back down. He itched to go check on Tim, but leaving a threat like Phantom unwatched felt inherently wrong.

“Your other son,” Danny continued. “Is doing quite well. He’s learning that he has hobbies again. He’s actually working under me, you know.”

“He’s what.”

Oh, yeah, that tracks. It figured that Jason wouldn’t tell Bruce about anything. He’s still conflicted about his death. Danny got it.

“Ah, that’s precious information. You’ll have to offer something of equal value if you want to know. There is, on the other hand, a piece of information I’ll give you for free.”

Danny paused for the dramatic effect. It was lost on Bruce, the ultimate drama queen of this world.

“The League of Assassins are hanging around Hotham lately. It’s getting tedious, getting rid of them. I suggest talking to your old flame, you know, with words and what little communication skill you’ve got rattling around in your noggin to get them to pull back. Her interest is… unnaturally focused on Jason.”

Danny read the dark agreement swimming about Bruce’s face and inclined his head. “Should negotiations fail, rest assured that Jason will be protected.”

“…Thank you.”

“You are most welcome. Go ahead and discuss the contract with Mr. Fox, I am sure you’ll find little problems with it. Ah,” Danny stood up, fixing his suit jacket. “And you should probably check up on Timothy. He’s probably having a great time in your office, Mr. Wayne.”

“I’ll see you out.”

“Of course.”

Having Batman escorting him out should probably be more intimidating.

Danny stood in the elevator, waiting for Bruce’s contemplative silence to put itself into words.

Sure enough, “What… what kind of hobbies does Jason have now?”

“I’d tell you to ask him, but you two aren’t on speaking terms, are you? He likes books, of course, but recently, he’s found an interest in glass blowing. He made quite a bit of progress on his attempts at sun catchers.”

“I see.”

Well, Danny’s not about to step on that landmine any more than he has to.

——

“Danny.”

“Oh, hey, Jason. Sit down, we were about to have dinner.”

Jason clambered into the window. Danny sighed. He had a door, but by the way Jason never used it, it was like the door didn’t exist.

“Mind telling me why the old bastard showed up on my rooftops with a bunch of glass and glassblowing tools?”

Danny smiled. “No idea.”

“Uh huh.”

Danny placed a hand on his chest and put on his best woe-is-me expression. The teen’s face twitched in annoyance. “Doubt? At me? Why, I never!”

A bread roll thwacked him in the face.

[chaoticwriting]

Fenton Crime Family

-Wayne Manor, Gotham-

Stephanie: So no one is gonna ask why Cass has been out so much lately? Alone too.

Duke: Didn't she say she is going out to meet a friend?

Stephanie: Yeah, but no one knows where she goes. We don't know who she goes out with nor do we know where she goes.

Tim: Just say that you are jealous that Cass is going out without you. No will make fun of you.

Jason & Duke: That's a lie.

Tim: Yeah, that's a lie. I would totally make fun of you.

Stephanie: Shut up nerd. Don't pretend you are not jealous when Bernard or Conner says that they are hanging out with someone else.

Tim: Woah there. Jason is the nerd one. If you want to insult me, at least use the correct one.

Jason: I want to be mad but you're not wrong.

Damian: Tt, why should we bother who Cain goes out with? It is her choice who she wishes to be her companion.

Stephanie: But aren't you curious even a little bit? Who is the person? Where do they go? Are they friends or something more? There are so many questions and yet so little answer.

Bruce: We should give Cass some room for herself. Letting her form a relationship outside of this household is also good.

Everyone: *Stares at Bruce*

Jason: I think the old man is being mind controlled. Let me punch him to wake him up.

Dick: Are you sick, B? Do you want to go to Dr. Leslie? I can take over your patrol tonight if you are not feeling well.

Damian: I also agree with Todd. Father might be compromised right now. Let's take him down.

Tim: Wait wait. Do you have anything to say before we jump you Bruce?

Bruce: *Grunts* I went to meet the therapist that Jason recommended to me. Dr. Fenton says that I should give my children room to grow independently so that I can take the first step in treating my paranoia.

Jason: *Gasp* You actually went to meet the therapist. Fuck.

Stephanie: He he he, where is my 50 bucks? I told you he would go if you recommend it.

Jason: *Grumble while handing out 50 bucks*

Duke: So that's where you are going. I thought you were going on a date.

Bruce: I am too old for dating anymore.

Dick: Yeah, right. Tell that to me when you go meet Selina later tonight.

Bruce: *Grunts*

Alfred: *Walks in* I am here to inform that Miss Cassandra has returned.

Dick: She's not gonna eat lunch?

Alfred: Miss Cassandra has informed me that she has eaten outside with her friend.

Jason: Did you see who her friend is? Is it a boy or a girl? Please tell me it's a boy.

Alfred: I'm afraid I cannot tell you anything as per my agreement with Miss Cassandra. What I can tell you though is that she is very happy to meet her friend. I suggest all of you don't disturb her happiness.

Stephanie: What? Boooo. I want answers. Timothy I choose you. Go find the answer using your stalker skills.

Tim: I would rather not anger her after what she did last time. All of my coffee mugs are still stuck on the table.

Duke: *Scoffs* You would probably go behind her back to find this friend anyway. You're just saying it in case Cass heard us.

Tim: I shall not confirm nor deny the accusation.

-Upstairs-

Cass lays on her bed after changing her clothes. It's been so long since she saw Danny. If not for the coincidental encounter at the stores, she wouldn't have known that Danny is in Gotham. After the first encounter, they exchanged phone numbers and talks and even met up often. Today is their first official date as a girlfriend/boyfriend.

Cass takes her phone to text Danny that she has reached home safely when she suddenly remembers something. She opens her gallery and puts the photos of her and Danny in a secure secret folder so that no one can find it.

While doing that, a text comes through.

Danny 💕💓💕

Danny: Hey Cass, are you home yet?

Cass: Yes. I just got home.

Danny: Thanks for the date today

Cass: 💖💖

Cass: Are you home yet?

Danny: Almost

Danny: Sorry gotta go. My sister is calling.

Cass: Get home fast. Love you 😘

Danny: I love you too 💖

Cass puts the phone on the bed and closes her eyes. Soon, she falls asleep and dreams of living in a large house with a lot of children running around.

-The Bowery, Gotham-

A young skinny man with black hair and blue eyes is walking down the quite alley slowly. He looks around him as the people of the Bowery look almost respectful but certainly fearful to him.

He sighs and leaves the sprawled bodies on the ground. They wouldn't die. He makes sure of that. A huge man comes within his proximity when suddenly the man bows down to him.

????: We are sorry, sir. These people are a new gang in the rise from the east. We get the news too late to send people to dispose of them.

Danny: Chill out, Jeff. Just take them to Dani and let her handle it. Also, tell her to return before dinner or else Jazz will come for her.

Jeff: Yes, sir.

The man along with a few of his henchmen pick the bodies and move them to somewhere else. To be honest, Jazz and Danny still don't know how to feel that their little sister is officially a crime lord.

All of them moved last month since Jazz gets her job at Arkham Asylum and Danny gets his internship at Wayne Enterprise. Dani tags along since she has explored all the places she wants to visit and she doesn't know what else to do.

Well that also didn't last long, as the first day they arrived at Gotham, Dani goes to beat up all the gang and goons in The Bowery and round them up into one single group. It's certainly easier that all the rouges are in Arkham right now.

One time the Falcon crime family tried to threaten Dani by taking Danny and Jazz hostage. In the end, Falcon and other crime families agree to stay out of The Bowery after Danny freezes all of their building and Dani strikes them with lightning multiple times.

Danny arrives home and sits on the couch. He scrolls Twitter while waiting for his sisters to return when the news catches his eyes.

Breakout at Arkham Asylum

All the people of Gotham are suggested to stay inside tonight.

Danny looks at the news with concern. Usually a breakout at Arkham happens a lot later in the day. He stands up, picks a leather jacket and a mask and then transforms into Phantom. He wears the mask and the jacket and flies towards Arkham Asylum to check out what happened. Today is Saturday so Jazz isn't working so he doesn't worry that much about Jazz.

On his way to Arkham, he encounters some rouge like The Riddler and Scarecrow. He knocks them out and hangs them on a poll and continues flying towards it. He's not a hero anymore but if the rogues are to enter and cause havoc in The Bowery, neither him, Jazz nor Ellie will be happy.

Suddenly, he sees a clown car speeding through the road at a very fast speed. Danny looks at it and sees the Joker along with his few goons are making a getaway while being chased down by a few cop cars. Danny flies down towards the clown car, and slowly unscrews the tyres of the car.

Danny flies back a little bit to the back and the clown car starts to wiggle and waggle and suddenly all of the tyres come off the car. Danny can hear the clown cursing heavily until finally they crash into a poll.He flies back down and just to make sure he is permanently down or at least down for some time, snap his back bone to incapacitate him.

Danny, still invisible, flies back up and continues on his way to Arkham. He meets a few more escapees like Mr. Freeze, Firefly and Killer Croc. Except for Killer Croc, all the other rouges are beaten up and sent back to Arkham. Killer Croc or Waylon is not thinking of causing trouble. He just wants to return to the sewer cause it is his home. Danny plans to maybe offer Waylon employment in their gang if he feels like Waylon is stable enough to work. Meanwhile, he will go around the city and beat up rogues that he is pretty sure is not going out to have a tea party.

When Danny lands on the roof, he opens his phone to see Cass is warning him to stay at home and not go outside. He smiles wryly since he is already outside and is beating up the rouges. Danny replies with a thumbs up and is about to continue flying when a shadow jumps out from behind him.

Danny: Uh, hello? How are you?

???: *Stares*

Danny: I'm no trouble. Just on the lookout just in case there is a rouge nearby. I see some guy beat up Scarecrow and The Riddler on my way here. They are not so scary when they don't have anything to use you know.

???: Where?

Danny: Errr, I think it is right over there. I was coming from that direction so you would probably see them if you go this way.

???: Thank you.

The shadow then vanishes and Danny is left standing there. The shadow really reminded him of Cass for some reason. Looking up online, apparently that one is called Black Bat.

Danny: Huh, they are out early today then. I guess they can work during the day.

Danny then turns invisible and returns back to the Bowery because most of the notorious rogues have been captured and Danny isn't worried about the rest.

Part 2

[jabberwockypie]

So @lynati is out of town today and tomorrow, working, but she has been living her best life and embracing her desire to be surrounded by toy Breyer horses for the first time in 25 years, and is really just having a great time with it.

Unfortunately, a particular horsie, Hot Cocoa, who she had REALLY wanted sold out last week before she had a chance to get her. She thought she had more time, because some of the previous years' horsies are still in stock from past years.

Horf!

So Hot Cocoa was sold out, and she was very sad, and there were ZERO OF THEM anywhere else on the internet - this one was sold only through the Breyer website, and nobody had listed any on Ebay or Mercari. We set up some saved searches to try to get her later if she came up, probably at a terrible mark-up, but what else can you do?

Anyway, Lynati got a different, extra-fancy horse in the mail yesterday, and he's a very pretty boy with blues and golds and purples.

Lynati didn't have any others in this mold, but she brought him upstairs to show me yesterday when she got him in the mail, and I agreed as this was a very pretty horse and flipped him over because I was admiring how pretty the blue-fading-to-purple effect is, and I go "WOW. My god, they put a lot of effort into sculpting this horse's junk."

The fact this sculptor clearly spent hours and hours on this horse model, including what had to be rather a lot of time on the individual veining on the Horse Dick* is truly kind of impressive, but I also find it extremely funny in contrast with how pearl-clutchy some American Girl doll collectors get about even the implication that people may have had sex or might be naked at some point, ever. (There are a whole bunch of people get weird about the fact dolls like Kaya and Felicity don't come with underpants - because they wouldn't have worn them. In the 18th century. And, let me be clear, their bodies are just tube-shaped stuffed cloth with no anatomical detail whatsoever.)

*Lynati will I'm sure correct me that that is the "sheath" and testicles, but I am not a horse person and I am therefore comfortable referring to it as the horse's dick.

So today, I was relating to my friend @lylilorden my amusement at the contrast between American Girl doll people and the Breyer people with their lovingly-sculpted super-detailed Horse Genitals.

(Quoth Lyli, "and the breyer folks just. "these are ANIMALS and they FUCK"". Yes. Yes they are.)

And I'm looking for a picture of the Special Fancy Horse to show her, and then suddenly, at the bottom of the page on the Breyer website, where I see this:

HOT COCOA IN STOCK, MOTHERFUCKERS

So I call Lynati in a tizzy because this is clearly a Horf-Collecting Emergency, and the horf is now on the way to our house. The day is saved! And I wouldn't have been on the Breyer website if I hadn't been talking to Lyli about the other horse's magnificent . . . endowments.

✨ It's a Christmas miracle! By the power of lovingly-sculpted horse cock. ✨

And now, at the bottom of this post - so people can read the rest of the post and skip it if you want - I have gone downstairs to take a picture of Courcheval's junk, so you can all see what I'm talking about here. (Content warning: plastic toy horse genitalia)

[minniesmutt]

No idea if you're taking requests or ideas right now but I just thought of this and I think it would come out really well if you were the one who wrote it. ChanLix threesome with Lix in the middle of fem!Reader and Chan. His deep groans would be so so so amazingly perfect. Anyway, I know you're busy with other wips and requests and just life in general so if you do eventually decide to take this on, thanks. Take care of yourself and have a good day/night 🩷

Ps. I love your work and it inspired me to start posting my writing on here and I'm all the better for it and I never got the chance to tell you how your incredible writing skills have impacted me in such a positive way so thank you for sharing your writing with us on this hell site

☾ ━━━━━━ 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐰

☾ ━━━ PAIRING: CHAN X READER X FELIX ☾ ━━━ CONTENT: ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP (READER AND CHAN), SWITCH!READER, DOM!CHAN, SUB!FELIX, THREESOME, MXM ACTION (forgive me if it’s terrible), TEASING, MOMMY/DADDY KINK, PRAISE, NIPPLE PLAY, MARKING, DRY HUMPING, TIT SUCKING. FINGERING (V. AND A.), FINGER SUCKING, ORAL SEX (F. & M. REC), FACE SITTING, HAND JOB, CUM EATING, OVERSTIM, PROTECTED SEX (V. AND A.), MULTIPLE ORGASMS, SUBSPACE (?), AFTERCARE ☾ ━━━ WC: 3.1K ☾ ━━━ NOTE: we don't talk about how long this sat in my drafts before I actually started working on it... also, I'm so glad I have inspired you annonie 🥲 ☾ ━━━ 18+ work!! minors and ageless/blank blogs DNI! you will be blocked, put an indicator on your blog somewhere that you are 18+ before interacting with this work/blog

     Y/n always enjoyed her relationship with Chan, everything was always great, even in bed. But when you've been with someone so long, and share desires and fantasies you think you'll never get when it comes to a long-term relationship, one or more parties start to wonder.

     "Hey baby," Chan said as he walked out of the bathroom and into their bedroom.

     “Yes, love?” Y/n asked

     "Do you remember when we were talking about sexual fantasies when we first got together?" the producer asked, lying on their bed facing her.

     "Is that why you were in the shower for so long?" Y/n teased him as she set down her phone.

     "I wasn't in there that long," Chan defended himself. “But I was thinking about it when I was in there."

     "What exactly?" Y/n asked as she scooted over to him.

     "Remember how you said you've wanted to try domming, but I've never given you a chance to?" 

     "Yeah. Finally going to put down the controls and let me dom you?" 

     “Let me finish,” Chan said before she got too excited, “And how both wanted to try a threesome at least once?”

     “What are you getting at, Christopher?”

     “Do you want the long or the short version?”

     “There’s two versions?” Y/n was very interested in this now. 

     “Which one do you want?” Chan asked again

     “Short?”

     “Was talking with Felix and he agreed to both.”

     “Long version because what the fuck does that mean?”

     “Felix and I were talking earlier today and he was kind of complaining —“

     “Felix complained?”

     “Yeah. But you remember the girl he was seeing for a bit?”

     “Yeah. The one none of us liked.”

     “Correct. I guess she told Felix she liked experimenting in the bedroom and it turns out it was only with things she wanted. So he had asked her once to dom him and she flat out refused.”

     “Bitch.”

     “Yeah. That led me to say how you’ve always wanted to try but I have a hard time giving up control in the bedroom then I don’t know how we got on the topic of threesomes but eventually I asked if he was okay with it, I would talk to you and see if you were okay with a threesome between me, you, and Felix.”

     “He’s okay with it?”

     “One hundred percent.”

     “We’ll need rules.”

     “Should I call him?”

     “Yeah.”

     It was an interesting conversation. Never did Y/n think they would find someone willing to indulge her and her boyfriend. Especially one of their close friends. The three ended up having a pretty long conversation about boundaries, safe words, hard no’s, all of it. Y/n could tell Felix was excited, to say the least. Part of him was really glad he confided that information to Chan. Originally he just wanted someone to vent to and who better than Chan?

     The younger Aussie did feel like he was in a fever dream when Chan offered to talk to his girlfriend about it. Felix knew that Chan could be a little possessive of his girlfriend in a good way. So a threesome was the last thing he expected from him. But now it was real. 

     He and Chan had driven back to his and Y/n’s together. It wasn’t awkward in the car but he felt a little nervous when the two idols entered the house. Y/n was cleaning up their kitchen when the two walked in after setting their things down. 

     “Hey,” Y/n greeted the two.

     “Hey,” Chan said as he came around their counter and kissed her lips

     Y/n picked up on Felix’s nerves, “You okay, Lix?”

     “Yeah,” He answered as he sat at their bar

     “He’s been nervous since we got in the car,” Chan teased

     “I have not,” Felix defended

     “It’s okay Lix,” Y/n giggled, “It’s new for everyone involved.”

     The younger one watched as she came around the counter to him. His eyes darted from her to Chan. Chan just watched as his girlfriend cupped the other idol's face and pressed her lips to his. Smiling to himself when he heard the boy whimper into her mouth. Walking around to stand behind the Aussie, hands grabbing his waist.

     He watched as Y/n pulled away and Felix chased her lips. Giggling behind him, “She’s good at that,” he said, pressing his lips to his neck.

     “Don’t tease him too much,” Y/n told her boyfriend as she ran her fingers through Felix’s long hair.

     “Why not?” Chan asked, “He wants more of those pretty lips, don’t you, Lixie?”

     Felix nodded as he looked up at Y/n. “Words Lix. Closed mouths don’t get fed, right?”

     “Please kiss me, mummy,” Felix said without a second thought

     “Mummy, huh?” Y/n asked him, a smile on her lips

     “Does that make me daddy?” Chan questioned

     “Sorry. It just—” Felix stammered.

     “It’s okay Lix. Chan has a daddy kink anyways,” Y/n giggled, pecking his lips again. “You don’t have to apologize.”

     “Just let mummy and daddy take care of you tonight, okay baby boy?” Chan said as he slipped his hands under the other boy’s sweater and shirt. Warm hands on Felix’s stomach.

     “Okay,” Felix agreed

     “Good boy,” Y/n said as she pressed her lips to his.

     Felix moaned into her mouth as he felt Chan’s lips sucked on the skin behind his ear. Hands moving up his torso and fingers lightly pinching his nipples. He could feel both of them smiling at his reaction. Y/n’s own hands ran down from his hair to the waistband of his sweats. Hand running over the bulge in his pants.

     “Think we should make our baby boy more comfortable, mama?” Chan asked

     Y/n pulled her lips away from Felix’s and looked at the older Australian. “We should.” She agreed. Y/n took the younger man’s hand and pulled him up to their bedroom. Chan followed behind them.

     Felix was almost in a daze from everything. It was honestly— at where they were at currently— better than he imagined. Especially as Y/n sat him on the edge of the bed and helped him out of his shirt and sweater. Chan stood behind her and Felix watched as he pulled her shirt over her head, leaving her without a bra in front of him. He could see a few vague hickey marks on her neck that he knew were Chan’s doing. The dancer blubbing like a fish. He hadn’t even noticed till now but he figured she hadn’t worn a bra in her own home. 

     Chan smiled at Felix as he turned his girlfriend’s head towards him and kissed her lips briefly. His other hand pushed one of her legs between Felix’s— her knee pressing right against his hard cock. Y/n looked down at him and grabbed the back of his head, pulling him closer to her. “Feeling okay, baby?” Y/n asked as she brushed a few streaks of hair out of his face.

     “Yes, mummy.”

     “Been staring at mummy’s pretty tits?” Chan teased

     “Mhm,” Felix nodded

     “Taste good too,” Chan added as he bit her shoulder

     “Can I…” Felix started

     “Can you what, bub?” Y/n asked

     “Can I taste?” Felix asked

     “Of course you can.”

     Felix didn’t waste another second. His lips wrapped around one of her nipples while one hand groped her other boob. Chan smiled as he captured his girlfriend’s lips in his and pushed his tongue past her lips. Y/n moaned into his mouth as Felix sucked on her nipples and slowly ground against her knee between his legs.

     “Lixie making you feel good, mama?” Chan asked

     “Mhm,” Y/n hummed in response.

     Chan’s hand slid past the waistband of her lounge pants. Fingers gently rubbing between her folds and collecting her slick. Chan chuckled to himself as Y/n leaned her head back against his shoulder. Her fingers grabbed the roots of Felix’s hair as Chan’s fingers dipped into her aching hole. Slowly moving in and out of her then making eye contact with Felix in front of them. His eyes softened with one of her boobs in his mouth still as he looked up at Chan.

     The producer pulled his fingers out of her and her pants. He gently pulled Felix’s head back, leaving his mouth hanging open after he unlatched from her nipple. Chan slipped the fingers that were in her cunt into his mouth. Resting them on his tongue and watching his mouth close. His eyes almost crossed as he sucked the juices off his fingers.

     “Mummy taste good?” Y/n asked him

     “Yes,” Felix said with Chan’s fingers in his mouth

     “Wanna taste mummy yourself?” Chan asked

     “Mhm,” Felix said

     “Words, baby.” Chan reminded him

     “Yes, please.”

     “Good boy,” Chan said and slipped his fingers out of his mouth and helped Y/n out of her bottoms. Felix laid back on their bed and watched as Chan slowed off her clothes and his shirt.

     “Want mummy on your face?” Chan asked him

     “Yes please,” Felix responded

     Y/n grabbed one of their pillows and placed it under Felix’s head before climbing on top of him, legs on either side of his head. The dancer’s hands grabbed the tops of her thighs as his tongue slipped into her. Moaning as her taste touched his tastebuds.

     Chan watched for a moment as his girlfriend rode his friend’s face. Both of their moans filled the bedroom. His dick was already aching and the sight before him made him harder as he pulled Felix’s sweats and boxers off him. The younger one’s dick springing up the moment it was out of its confines. Tip leaking with pre cum. 

     Chan leaned down and licked the pre cum that dribbled down his length and out from his tip. Felix shaking a little from the contact. Chan chuckled and swallowed the precum before standing straight up and opening the drawer to their dresser. He pulled out a couple of condoms and their lube. Setting all the items on the bed. 

     The oldest grabbed the lube and squirted some on his finger. Pushing up Felix’s legs and exposing him to Chan. He took his libed finger and gently pushed the digit inside him. Taking his time getting in so Felix could get used to it before finally letting himself properly finger the man’s ass. Working slowly as he moaned into his girlfriend’s cunt. Y/n looked back at Chan, seeing him prepping the younger one. 

     Felix was so involved im pleasing the woman on top of him that it was easier for Chan to slip in and out of him. He had to pull away from Y/n for a moment a couple of times to beg Chan to pick up the pace and slip a second finger in. Chan’s fingers were longer and thicker than Felix’s. 

     The rapper wasn’t afraid to admit he’d fingered himself quite a bit when jacking off. It felt good but when someone else did it for you it felt better. Places he typically couldn’t reach on his own were getting reached down and he could feel himself getting addicted to it. 

     Felix’s hands gripped Y/n’s thighs tighter as his nose nudged her clit as she rolled her hips against his face. Chan’s fingers pumping in and out of him. His hips twitched desperately. Chan could see his dick twitching and wrapped his free hand around his shaft, pumping him in time with his fingers inside him. The producer watched both his girlfriend and friend fall apart, one right after the other. He smiled as Felix’s cum landed on his hand and the Aussie’s stomach. Twitching under him and Y/n while Y/n gripped his long black hair and Felix drank up her cum.

     Y/n climbed off him once both had come down from the highs and looked back at her boyfriend, fingers still in Felix. Felix himself looked down at Chan and moaned as the older man’s fingers scissored his hole. Y/n grabbed her boyfriend’s other hand and licked the cum off his fingers then leaned down and cleaned the remaining cum off Felix’s stomach and cock.

     The dancer’s mouth fell open as he watched her swallow the cum then Chan pulled her in for a kiss. Once he pulled away from her, he pulled his fingers out of Felix. He whined a little at the emptiness. Y/n sat Felix up as Chan pulled his gym shorts and boxers off. Felix got a glimpse at his size before Y/n pulled into another kiss. He melted into her lips again. Moments later Chan pulled him off her lips and pressed his to Felix’s. A moment later his lips were gone Chan moved to sit back on the pillows behind them. Grabbing one of the condoms and rolled it down his length. One look at the younger Australian and Felix straddled his lap. Y/n was next to Felix and helped him adjust his knees so both the men were comfortable— Chan did turn Felix. Chan held the base of his cock as Y/n helped Felix lower himself down onto Chan. Watching his face contort in pleasure as his tip pushed into Felix’s tight hole. 

     “Big…” the younger one moaned.

     “Is daddy too big for you, baby?” Y/n asked as she cupped his face, Chan’s hands grabbing his hips and holding him still

     “No. Can take it…” Felix moaned 

     “You sure, baby?” Chan asked for confirmation

     Chan was on the bigger side for Felix. All he had done was have a couple of fingers in himself so having a cock in his ass was a new feeling. A good feeling. Once he was more comfortable, he took more of the leader. Both parts of the couple were very patient with him. Chan’s warm hands kept him still and rubbed his hip bones with his thumbs as Y/n held him and kissed his neck, cooing at how good he was doing for them.

     Once Felix was fully comfortable and took as much as Chan as he could, Chan pulled him against his chest. His turn to kiss his neck and shoulders again. He watched as Y/n moved down a bit and leaned down, taking Felix’s cock in her hand and stroking him.

     Felix moaned and practically threw his head back onto Chan’s shoulder. Chan slowly started thrusting in and out of Felix which just increased the volume of his moans. Especially when Y/n replaced her hand with her mouth.

     He looked back down to see Y/n looking up at him and Chan. Chan’s thrust pushed Felix’s cock into her mouth. Between the both of them,—from the foreplay and what they were doing to him now— Felix’s mind had all but stopped working. Turning to mush.

     Chan noticed, he always noticed everything. He pulled his girlfriend off his cock and motioned for her to straddle the both of them. He paused his thrusts for a moment and rolled a condom over his cock and helped her onto him. Keeping one of his hands on Felix’s waist and laced the fingers of his other hand with his girlfriends. Y/n leaned over the two and grabbed the headboard behind Chan. Holding herself up a bit and bounced herself up and down on Felix while Chan thrusted in and out of him. Both of them meeting in the middle occasionally.

      All three moaning in sync. The bedroom was filled with moans and skin slapping. Felix’s moans were the loudest of the three. The poor boy was fucked out of his mind now. The only thing was the pleasure that surrounded him. Nothing else was on his mind. Especially when he couldn’t handle it anymore and came into the condom he was wearing, cursing and shaking between the two of them. Both Chan and Y/n continued their movements as Felix rode out his high. Chan didn’t take long to cum after. Shoving himself into Felix and came into the condom he wore. 

     Y/n watched the two men lose themselves in the pleasure as she rode on top of them. Chan came out of it quicker than Felix and took his dominant hand, thumb pressing to her clit and helping her while she did her best to keep the rhythm. She was putty in Chan’s hands. He knew every motion to get her off quickly. All the quickies they’d have between his stages, practices, and even early in the morning before they had to work or he had a flight to catch, somehow always helped in his favor over the years. Especially now, he refused to let his girlfriend be unsatisfied, no matter what.

     He watched as she came apart on Felix’s cock, holding herself on the headboard while she rode out the high. Felix moaned as she clamped down on his softening cock. Chan smiled and helped his girlfriend off Felix before they both helped Felix to lie on their bed. Chan fought with his girlfriend about her letting him do all the aftercare work. She didn’t let him though.

     Y/n grabbed a few warm wet towels for them and returned to the bedroom. Chan had discarded both the condoms and when she came back. He took the towels from her and cleaned up Felix as she left to grab some water and a small snack for them. Chan ended up stopping her at the door, took the items from her and set them on the nightstand before cleaning her up himself and tucking her into one of their oversized shirts.

     “You left Felix all alone in our bed,” Y/n judged her boyfriend

     “I told him I had to clean up mummy and gave him one of your plushies for the time being,” Chan told her.

     “Did we fuck him into a sub-space?” Y/n asked

     “Maybe. He does what cuddles though,” Chan informed her.

     “So do I,” Y/n pecked her boyfriend’s lips and the two got back in the bed with their friend.

The couple got him to drink some water and eat a bit of the fruit she had brought up before he ended up falling asleep in their bed. The couple agreed to let him sleep in the bed with them, neither of them having an issue with it. Figuring they’d all talk about everything else in the morning. The two had managed to ask him a few things to make sure he wasn’t fully dropped in subspace. Mostly he was just tired and Y/n understood fully, and she knew Chan had gone a lot softer on Felix than he usually did with her. 

     She for sure was giving them both shit later once they were all rested. The couple drank their water and shared the snacks she’d brought up to get a bit of energy as Felix slept soundly between them.

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[livinginshambles]

You're unbelievable (derogatory) | James Potter

Pairing: James Potter x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 5.3k

Summary: You're best friends with James, but since his new relationship with Lily, you find yourself standing on the side more often than not.

Your friendship with James breaks when he has to choose between you or Lily, and it's only after the damage is done that he realizes the consequences of his actions.

Note: Lily's kind of a not cool in this fic. Not proofread, mistakes (grammar and maybe continuity because I rewrote the middle from memory) Time lines are wrong, howarts is endless.

_______________________

“James Potter, you’re unbelievable!” You exclaimed, and if not for the widest grin ever plastered on you face, those words could hold an entirely different meaning. You gave James a tight side hug while you clutched your precious gift to your chest.

“Well, you better believe it darling,” Sirius appeared on your left. “Prongs made us stand in line for that signed copy for eight hours. EIGHT HOURS,” he complained and shook James back and forth by his shirt collar.

“And not to mention, he woke us up at 2 o’clock in the morning for that,” Peter happily reminded him, and Sirius wailed at the memory and dramatically dropped to his knees. You stumbled back and James was quick to hold you steadily.

“Oh, quit it with the theatrics,” Remus mused, and he pulled Sirius up from the floor where he had slouched his entire weight against your legs. “It wasn’t that bad.”

Sirius huffed. “For you maybe. Because you secretly wanted to get your book signed too,” he accused Remus. Remus sheepishly shrugged.

James pressed a kiss to your temple, and you melted inside. “Happy birthday, love,” he whispered with a fond smile, and you bashfully looked away.

“Thanks,” you muttered awkwardly. Godric, you despised the attention that birthdays bring along.

“On that note, I’m heading towards the library,” you excused yourself. “But thank you guys so much for getting that book for me, I love you guys so much,” you said and blew them a kiss as you stepped backwards to the door.

“Hold on,” James frowned. “We’re not celebrating?”

“Uh, no I have to work on our Potions assignment.”

“Oh. Well, let me walk you to the library, yeah?” James offered, but you had an inkling feeling that it wasn’t really a question.

You laughed and pulled a face at him. “I can’t stop you anyways, can I? You’re an absolute menace, Potter.”

“I’m just trying to spend the day together.” James wrapped an arm around you and guided you towards the door. 

“You know, the day on which the world has been blessed with your birth. And just as it was always meant to be, might I add, because look at where this led, such a perfectly beautiful day to celebrate.” He winked.

“Today is a wonderful day,” you hummed in agreement. “But you know I was supposed to be born late April, not March. So not really ‘as it was always meant to be’ at all,” you pointed out.

James rolled his eyes. “Uh, yes it was. Otherwise, we would’ve never met at the hospital and become bestest friends.”

“That’s not even correct gramm-”

“Besides, didn’t see you much today,” James unbotherdly continued.

You shook your head in amusement. “Come along then,” you pretended to relent in a joking manner. James was already pulling you along anyway.

You looked back at the rest of the marauders. “You guys also coming?”

You got an unenthusiastic hum from Peter and nothing from Remus, who was too deep in his book to have heard you. You looked at Sirius.

“Darling, I love you, but that’s six flights of stairs,” Sirius laughed, and he settled in on the sofa.

You gasped in fake horror. “So, is that the limit of your love for me?” You sniffed and pretended to wipe away a tear. “I guess-, I guess that’s it then. We’re just not meant to be,” you sighed.

“I know, darling. And I’m sorry. Just know, it’s not you, it’s me,” Sirius solemnly agreed.

You opened your mouth to continue your devastating-sad-ending-love-story when James, who had felt strangely annoyed at Sirius, impatiently grabbed your hand and pulled you out the door.

You enjoyed the feeling of walking hand in hand with James, even though it was short-lived. He let go of your hand as soon as he realized he was still holding it, and you two walked next to each other in a comfortable silence. Again, short-lived.

“I swear, one of these days, Lily might give me a chance. She smiled at me yesterday after supper, you know.” James happily bragged, eyes in a dreamy haze, no doubt imagining Lily.

You peered up at him and quietly admired his blissed look. It may never be directed towards you but seeing him so happy really made you glad and all warm inside.

Not that you’d ever let him know that.

Instead, you snorted at his words, tiptoed, and slung an arm across his broad shoulders. “In your dreams, maybe,” you sassed at him. James wanted to huff at your reply, but at your struggle to reach his other shoulder, he couldn’t help but laugh wholeheartedly, and he wrapped his arms around your shoulder instead.

“You’ve got to stop growing, James,” you protested and ducked out from under his arm.

“Quite the opposite actually, perhaps you should start,” he mocked you and you reached out to shove him but he put a step back out of the way fluently and then smoothly pulled back his shoulder just in time when you tried to shove him again. “So predictable,” he tsked. You opted to stick out your tongue instead.

“So,” James started. You hummed in reply. “Mum’s asking if you’re spending Easter with us again,” he casually mentioned.

“Oh really, Euphemia is asking me huh,” you teased him.

James looked away embarrassedly.

“Hm, not sure,” you shrugged nonchalantly. “Think I’m gonna be sort of preoccupied with my cousins from Ireland,” you looked at him through the corner of your eyes and caught his disappointed expression. A grin grew on your face like that of a Cheshire cat and you nudged him again.

“Oh, come on James, I’m kidding, you know. I’ve literally never not spent Easter with you. Besides, I live right across the street, James. I can literally come over any time, even if my cousins visit.”

“Yeah, but I meant like stay over at my house for the whole holiday,” James pouted. You glanced at him and smiled fondly. “Well, again; I live right across the street. So I guess I can also just go and visit my cousins at my house any time.”

You finally reached the bottom of the staircases and stopped mid-step. “Bloody hell, I forgot my books.”

You shot James a sheepish smile. “Sorry, I just have to go back up real quick, but it won’t be long at all-.”

“I’m right behind you, love.”

“You can’t be serious,” you gaped at him.

James was beaming. Sirius and Remus’ jaws were slacked on the floor and Peter frowned as if he was trying to comprehend James’ statement.

“She agreed to a date!?” Sirius shrieked out. “But-,” Sirius stammered and he let his eyes fall onto you for a split second. It was very quiet for a moment while all of you processed this news.

“Well, I’ll be damned, Prongs,” you grinned up at him. “Not such a far-fetched idea after all.” You smiled encouragingly at him and he shot you a grateful look.

“Congrats,” you nudged him, and that seemed to break the rest of the marauders out of it, all congratulating and offering date ideas.

You zoned out for a moment. A bitter-sweet taste in your mouth. You we’re thrilled for James. You knew how much she meant to him. But that little piece of hope that you had unconsciously clung onto, made the news tough to take.

Regardless, you were just happy to have James in your life. He was your best friend, and you would support him, no matter what. Because you knew he’d do the same for you.

“When’s the date?” you curiously asked.

James scratched his head. “Uh, next week, Friday night.”

“Wait, Friday when you were going to take me to see the blue crescent moon?” you deadpanned.

“I’ll take you to the next one, I promise,” James solemnly swore and he put his hand on his heart.

You huffed in disappointment but quickly turned around to face Remus with a sweet smile. “Remus, my best friend,” you started, and instantly got pulled back by James who wore a pout on his face.

“Wait, it was supposed to be a you and me thing,” he whined while he tugged you back into his side. You stuck your tongue out and ruffled his hair.

“You’re busy, and the next blue moon is going to be a full moon, so we’ll be with Remus,” you pointed out. “And after that, it’ll be another two years until the next.” Then you skipped back over to Remus.

James hummed in thought. He knew you were right. “Fine,” he reluctantly said. “But I’m taking you to watch the passing comet next month,” he bargained.

You stuck out your hand with a laugh. “Deal,” you grinned.

“It’s a promise,” James confirmed.

It became clear to you that you might have overestimated your own importance to James after he and Lily officially started dating.

Your eyes were searching for James, and you decided to confront him when you spotted him.

“James!” You ran to catch up to him. You smiled at Lily with a small wave. “Lily,” you acknowledged her. “Can I borrow him for a moment?” You asked her. She shrugged and waved her hand in a discarding manner, “of course.”

“Hey uh, you didn’t show up yesterday, just checking in?” you asked James in concern when Lily was out of reach.

James mind blanked for a moment. He was racking his brain about ‘yesterday’ and his eyes grew wide when realization hit him. “Bloody hell, I completely forgot!” He exclaimed.

“Yeah,” you laughed, relieved that he was alright and had just forgotten about it.

“Well you didn’t show up in the astronomy tower so I tried looking for you, but I couldn’t find you. I asked Sirius for the map, but can you believe it? He said he’d lost it.”

You chuckled when you recalled his apologetic expression and completely missed the way James shut his eyes and pinched his nose in guilt.

“I’m so sorry,” James said. He pulled you into a hug.

“Eh, don’t worry about it, Sirius joined me to watch the comet pass by. Wasn’t that impressive, but it did look like a falling star so I guess I made a wish, and-”

“Can have him back now?” Lily’s voice came from behind him, and he quickly released you. “Yeah, of course,” you rushed to say, but she had already grabbed him by the arm and led him away.

James looked back at you and mouthed a ‘sorry’ at you. You shook your head dismissively and raised your thumbs up.

It was only during the next missed hangout, two weeks later, that you found out he forgot because he’d been with Lily instead.

Peter had seen you off to find James, and had watched you return three hours later, a sad look on your face.

“Not again,” he’d groaned and slipped up. You couldn’t be angry at James because you realized that he was just putting effort into his new relationship. Peter had hugged you and you two had spent the evening sneaking into the art room to paint each other.

Peter was surprisingly a splendid artist and you had put the painting that he painted of yourself against the wall on the floor next to your bed, and gave Peter the one you painted of him.

“Damn, Peter,” James nodded at the canvas. “You painted that?”

“Huh? Oh,” Peter was getting dressed and pulled his sweater over his head. He looked from the painting to James. “Uh, Y/N did,” he beamed. “It looks good right?”

“You guys painted..?”

“Yeah, cause you didn’t show up again yesterday,” Peter casually mentioned. “You know, she was-“ He didn’t get to finish his sentence, because James had already sprinted out of the room to find you to apologize.

But as usual, James thought it had to be a grand gesture.

Flowers! Lily liked flowers. Girls like flowers, perfect. The idea popped up in his head, and he went to work to cover your entire dorm and bed with flowers.

It seemed like a perfect idea.

Until it evidently wasn’t. 

“Shit, I’m so sorry, it slipped my mind,” James apologized for the thousandth time as he sat by at the side of the hospital bed with the rest of the marauders. They shared a look with each other.

“Well, I bet you’ll never forget about my severe flower allergy ever again now,” you joked in attempt to console him. Your face was swollen and your eyes were bloodshot.

You smiled at James and tried to push back the hurt you felt at the fact that he forgot about something as important as that.

“I’ll make it up to you,” James quickly promised with a grimace.

“Do you get that same sense of déjà vu or is it just me,” Sirius remarked from the other side of the bed.

“No, I get it too,” Peter agreed almost too quickly.

James frowned at his friends for the little jab. They knew he didn’t do it on purpose right? He looked at Remus for support.

“Better be one hell of an idea,” was all he said.

“Oh come on,” you attempted to kick Sirius weakly with your leg but failed because your legs were still half paralyzed.

“Stop giving him such a hard time,” you started. James shot you a relieved look.

“He’s already feeling shit for almost killing me,” you grinned and James groaned and dropped his head on the side of your bed. You moved your arm with some effort and let your fingers stroke through his hair.

“I’ll be the best best-friend there is, starting from right now. I’ve got so many ideas for Easter holiday and it includes your favorite chocolate,” he promised in a muffled voice.

 

Whatever you imagined his ideas for activities during the Easter holiday included, it wasn’t with Lily in the picture. Yet here you were, sitting across of her at the dinner table.

They were both deeply engrossed in each other and you and Fleamont shared a look.

“How’s your year been, sweetheart?” Fleamont asked and he looked at you over his glasses. You smiled at him, relieved.

“It was great so far, I mean, despite being bedridden for two weeks, but the guys have been great,” you jumped to talk about your adventures.

“I went to watch the blue crescent moon with Remus, and the comet with Sirius. And I’ve painted with Peter! I’ve got to say, he’s painted me in a flattering light,” you rambled on passionately.

“Oh, and we’ve started a study group thing together, it’s basically just Remus and I trying to help Sirius and Peter though,” you lightheartedly joked.

“We’ve played some harmless pranks too, like turning every toad into a cat and every cat into a toad, it was utter chaos!” You shared and at his disapproving look and focus on James, you quickly intervened. “Don’t worry, James didn’t do anything, he’s been good,” you joked.

You missed Fleamont’s raised eyebrows.

“I’ve been swimming in the lake with the boys and pranked Remus and Peter with Sirius and pretended to be merpeople, you should’ve heard their screams!”

Your eyes were gleaming at this point as you relived your happiest moments so far. “Well, until Remus cast a spell on Sirius that turned him into a slug of course.”

“So when the four of us went to Hogsmeade…” You continued to ramble on and failed to notice how James’ eyes subconsciously trailed over to you every now and then, listening in on the conversation and realizing his name never fell once.

Lily noticed his divided attention and was unsurprisingly and rather justifiably annoyed at James.

She voiced out her concerns to James that very night during which you had excused yourself and gone home across the street.

You didn’t want to third wheel and Godric forbid should you share a room with Lily.  She hated your guts as it was and you didn’t feel like being smothered in your sleep.

When you had offered to go back home, you had sort of hoped he would say something along the lines of “No, please stay” and instead were met with a “Yeah, that’s probably for the best”.

And now, all he could wish for was chilling on his bed with you next to him while he was being chastised by Lily. His eyes glanced up and he stared at the enchanted bedroom ceiling full of stars, Lily’s voice long gone from his mind.

“Are you even listening to me?” She waved her hand in front of his face and he fought the urge to pull an annoyed face at her.

At his lack of response though, she repeated herself. “I’m your girlfriend. I thought you wanted this?”

James let her words sink in for a moment. She was all he ever wanted. And it was so so different from what he’d imagined it would be like.

Of course, he wasn’t planning on breaking up or anything, he didn’t want to be that douchebag that was only in it for the chase after all. And he hoped somehow that those feelings would return sometime.

She was everything he wanted. He just wished she’d be more interested in his friends, less disapproving of his pranks, or more proud of his achievements at Quidditch.

He would appreciate it if she were just a little bit more patient with him, and shared a little bit of his humour.

He just wanted her to be more open and enthusiastic about their relationship and himself.

He wanted her to be a little more like you-

He reeled back from that revelation. Oh.

Oh no. That would ruin his friendship.

“-and you know what, you can’t have both, James,” Lily continued and he snapped out of his thoughts.

“I can’t be your girlfriend if she’s in the picture. So choose. It’s me or her.”

James stared at her in surprise and then walked out of his room without another word to her.

He looked out the window at the real starry night sky. It seemed to him that he’d lose you regardless. But maybe, he’d be happy with Lily. She was all that matters, he convinced himself.

“Don’t you see how wrong it is that she’s making you choose,” you asked him incredulously, but your eyes looked at him pleadingly. James forced himself to look back at you and shook his head.

“No, she’s-, she’s right,” he mumbled, and you staggered back at that. “I mean, you’re a girl, you know?” You raised your eyebrows in an unimpressed manner. “Astute observation.” You dryly remarked.

“And everyone assumes things about us, so please, you have to understand that this isn’t fun for Lily either,” James tried. “I just can’t be friends with you and be in a relationship with Lily at the same time.”

You opened your mouth to protest, but he cut you off.

“I can’t,” he urged. “And between you or her, I choose her. She’s my girlfriend,” he reasoned.

“And I’m your best friend since we were born,” you stubbornly retorted.

James looked at you beggingly, hoping that you’ll understand his predicament and that you’d make it easy on him. At the squint of your eyes and the deepening frown on your face, he gulped. “Please. I’m really sorry, but I have to choose her,” he finished weakly, doubling down on his decision.

Realizing that he wasn’t joking, it felt like he might as well have punched you in the gut. Your stubborn look flickered to hurt and then morphed into an ice-cold front of indifference.

You took a deep breath and collected yourself. You stared at him up and down, not recognizing your best friend in him anymore.

“You’re unbelievable,” you shook your head at him, and your voice was devoid of any emotion. With no other words to address the situation, you pushed past him roughly.

Months passed by and the summer vacation started. Then it ended and Hogwarts began again. All without a word from James. He had stopped spending much time with the marauders, mostly busy with walking after Lily.

Sometimes he would glance at you when she wasn’t watching, and he’d feel so lonely.

He waited for you during the vacation, but you never went to yourr house across his. Instead you spent your time with your cousins in Ireland.

When he made his way towards the platform on September 1st,  he felt weird. First of all, he was slightly reluctant to go. He realized that he had thoroughly enjoyed his holiday without Lily.

But secondly, and perhaps most importantly; This was the first time ever that he went to the Hogwarts Express by himself, without you by his side, and an epiphany cleared his mind. Everything was so wrong.

 

You eyed him up and down. With lack of better words, he looked terrible. So terrible, that you might’ve pitied him any other time, because how could you ever be angry at James, when he looked so sad.

When his eyes are glassy and red. When his hair is disheveled as a result of an undoubtedly rough night. When his voice cracked at his sloppy apology. Or when his lips trembled almost unnoticeably when you said no.

But all of that wouldn’t magically clear away your own misery of the past months.

“I was supposed to be your best friend,” you enunciated slowly. “It’s always been you and me. Merlin, we’ve known each other since we were born and they ran out of baby cribs at St. Mungo’s, so they put us together in one!” you exclaimed.

You bitterly scoffed to yourself at the reminder of your literal lifelong friendship.

“But you cut me off for a relationship with Lily? Lily who rejected you for years and when she finally did agree to date you, never even gave you the time of the day?”

You stared at him incredulously and had to remind yourself to tone down your voice a little. You had unconsciously been raising it and didn’t want to attract unwanted attention.

“You followed her around like a lost puppy and cast me aside because she didn’t trust you for being friends with a girl and you were so easy to discard me,” you laughed humorlessly, trying to mask your hurt feelings. “I guess I must’ve really not meant all that much to you.”

To James’ credit, he at least had the decency of looking remorseful. His own words were replaying on a loop in his head. Of course he regretted it all.

“You can’t come back after that and expect me to just open my arms for you,” you firmly stated.

James looked at you helplessly, and you let out another laugh in disbelief. “Oh, Godric, you did,” you stared at him with wide eyes in surprise.

James could feel himself getting flustered and spoke up again. “I just thought that maybe-,”

“No, no, no. Like I said, I’m not doing this again.”

“Please, lov-, Y/N please, if you would just let me prove to you that you do mean so much to me,” His voice was getting increasingly more desperate. “I just want-, I need you to give me a second chanc-”

“A second chance? James, you are way past that. You’ve already had a second chance,” you bitterly told him. “Merlin, I’ve given you a second, third, fourth, fifth, and sixth chance. I would’ve given you a thousand chances, but even that, you threw away.”

You tiredly rubbed your face. “I have nothing left to give you.”

Your words hit him in the face and his chest tightened.

“Oh… No, I-, I definitely understand.” His voice came out quietly.

James wanted to hide away. He felt utterly pathetic and ashamed at his own actions.

“I’ll uh, I’ll leave you alone, then.” He turned around but stopped mid step.

“But Y/N? If you ever change your mind, or if you ever need me, I’ll be there for you this time. Always right behind you.” James let his eyes linger on your face for a moment, taking you in. Merlin, he really missed you.

Your mind struggled to find the words to properly articulate all that you’ve felt these past months.

“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry too. For not trying to fight for you more,” you sympathetically offered.

“Oh, what? No, that’s-, it really was all my own fault. I chose her over you, and it was stupid. I was stupid, not you.”

“I don’t know. I feel like I should’ve tried harder to find a solution. I regret it too, you know, that we lost us.”

James frowned at your words.

“You-, I don’t even-,” you sighed. “I thought we would be in it for life, you know,” you eventually confessed, and James eyes widened. He wasn’t sure if he understood that completely, but his heart had made a small jump at your confession. Surely you didn’t actually mean…?

“Maybe not side by side as lovers or anything,” you quickly tried to cover yourself, but instead confirmed James’ thoughts. “But I was so sure we’d be partners nonetheless.” James watched you smile fondly, but sadly at the thought.

“I tried so hard not to be jealous of the fact that I was no longer the first person you’d go to for everything.” You chewed on your lower lip and James forced himself to pry his eyes away from it.

“You could be again,” James whispered to himself. But it was loud enough for you to hear it. You chose to ignore it and the way your heart tugged.

“But it was never an issue of jealousy when you actively forgot me on so many different occasions and then just kicked me out for her.”

“I'm sorry, I don’t know why I… how I even…”

“Look, I have to go,” you settled on, and nodded awkwardly at him. “But thanks for apologizing,” you added before you left.

You’d gone about your life according to the same routine of the past few months and paid James little to no mind. Though he was spending all of his time with the marauders again, you somehow found a way of disappearing right when he would arrive.

Days passed and James watched you laugh at the punchline of the joke that a ghost had told you. So close and yet so far.

James knew that you told him no when he had asked if things could go back to the way they were, but he couldn’t give up on you. It was as if something was physically stopping him from doing so.

He wanted you to see him again, but would never cross your boundaries, which left him in a difficult position.

The first opportunity presented itself when he overheard some guy talk shit about you. Except he only saw red instead of an opportunity. Because how dare they.

“She’ll give in someday. I’ll show her how to have a good time. Godric knows she’s too prudish, wouldn’t even let me-“

James surged forward before he could even think and grabbed the guy by the collar, his wand was pointed at the boy’s throat in a matter of seconds, a piercing glare on his face as he gritted through his teeth.

“Don’t.” It was a warning and the boy heeded it and scrambled away when James released him.

“What are you looking at,” he called out to the students that had stopped to watch what was happening. They too, quickly scrambled away, pretending they hadn’t seen a thing.

But by supper, everyone had heard about it, including you. You looked at him from further down the table and nodded at him with a appreciated smile.

James heart skipped a beat and he dreamed of you that night.

So what else could he do for you that would make you happy, he wondered while he wandered around the castle. The marauders were hanging out with you right now, leaving James to his own devices.

“Books!” He yelled out loud and it startled a cat. “Signed books had been successful, right? But what books, and how to…” He muttered to himself.

You stared at the pile of books that started to form next to you while owls flew in and back out again, only to return with more books. When you opened the one on the pile to your left, you saw that it was signed by one of your favorite authors.

Your eyes grew wide and you quickly inspected the signature from up close. Your hands stroked the beautiful hard back cover of the book. First copy.

People all over the great hall were looking at the spectacle  but you just laughed and blew a kiss at the last owl.

You glanced at James because you knew it was him who orchestrated all of this. Only he would know all your favorite authors and books.

James simply offered you a smile and continued eating his food, but he was absolutely beaming inside at the gleeful look on your face.

You visited him in his dorms that night. “James,” you whispered. You held your finger to your lips as a sign not to wake the others.

“James, thank you for the books, they’re amazing,” you told him. “But James, you’ve got to stop. Don’t fight on my behalf. Don’t spend so much money on me. Please “ you begged him.

James’ smile fell. “I made you uncomfortable,“ he noted. You sighed and sat down on his bed. “I used to give you gifts all the time,” he weakly defended himself.

“I don’t want to forgive you,” you started. James looked down.

“You hurt me. Do you get that? You hurt me and broke our friendship and I don’t know when I’ll want to be friends again, but it’ll never the same when I do. So you have to stop doing all of this. You can’t try to buy it with gifts and heroic deeds.”

“I don’t want it to be the same either,” James sighed out in a defeated tone. “I just need you with me. One way or another. I’m not trying to buy anything, I just want to make you happy.”

You understood his words and the implied confession behind them. After all, you had felt the exact same way months ago.

You sadly smiled and pressed a kiss to his cheek. James closed his eyes at the contact and tried to savor the moment. You really were his greatest regret.

“I don’t want to forgive you,” you stubbornly repeated.

“You don’t have to. I just want to be there.”

“Right behind me, right? No matter what pace?”

“Of course,” he replied.

It took time. Months and months actually, where he respected your boundaries and slowly inserted himself back into your life, with your permission of course.

At first simply joining you with the marauders again. Then thoughtful actions such as giving you his spare quill. Later on even sitting next to you during Transfiguration and building up to study nights and eventually back to star gazing.

However slow it was, everything was worth it, James thought to himself as he opened the door to invite you in for the Easter holiday.

“Hi, thank you for coming over,” he widely smiled.

“Ah you know, I live right across the street, love.”

 

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[marauder-misprint]

Hello, I started reading Harry Potter again and while I was reading The Goblet Of The Fire, something like this came to my mind; Can we read the Christmas ball in the three wizard tournaments during the marauders period? who will invite who as a partner? I would be extra happy if something happens between fem!slytherin reader and Sirius. Maybe she's platonic or she's sure no one from Gryfindor will invite him because they have a secret relationship

.Thank you so much in advance, I love your stories.I hope you will write more, love

Hi! Thank you for the request ❤︎❤︎❤︎ we love a secret relationship, especially between Sirius and Slythering!reader - 10/10, will likely write again

Hope you enjoy!

Going public

Sirius Black x Slytherin!reader

7.1k words

cw: angst, fluff

The announcements for the Yule Ball were posted overnight. Every bulletin board was plastered with them; it was like there was nothing else of importance happening at Hogwarts. It was the talk of the school by the time you reached breakfast. It seemed like the students agreed with the bulletin boards: there was nothing more important. 

Passing the other tables on your way to your usual spot at the Slytherin table, you heard speculation about who the more popular people would be going with. The Prewett twins were a hot topic, as were the Marauders, Gilderoy Lockhart, Anthony Avery, Emmeline Vance, Stubby Boardman and Amelia Bones. 

You were able to tune most of it out. While gossip could be amusing, it wasn’t something you really sought out. 

“I’ll bet you a galleon Potter goes with Evans. He’s obsessed with her,” you heard a Hufflepuff say as you passed by.

Her friend laughed, “Oh, double it! He’ll ask, for sure, but there’s no way in hell that she’s saying yes!”

You stifled a laugh, knowing the second girl was correct. You were more than certain that James would indeed ask Lily to the dance, multiple times most likely, and Lily, having turned down James over and over again, would continue her ‘no’ streak. From what you were aware of, she was nowhere near breaking her resolve. 

“Morning,” Dorcas said as you sat down next to her. “Would you like to talk about the dance, the dance or, real strange this one, the dance?”

You rolled your eyes, reaching for your usual breakfast. Your silence is typical, especially in the morning before you’ve been given proper time to wake up. The girls made conversation around you. 

“Do you think it has to be guys ask girls? Or could I ask someone?” Pandora asked dreamily. She shot a glance over her shoulder toward a certain Ravenclaw. 

“I don’t think there’re rules for a dance. Although if Xeno doesn’t ask you, he’ll have bigger problems coming for him,” Emma Vanity assured her. 

You all knew about Pandora and Xenophilius’ flirtationship. You thought it was ridiculous for her to even consider that Xeno wouldn’t ask her, given the way he searches for her in between classes. 

“But if he doesn’t ask me? How weird would it be if I asked him?”

“Have you ever cared about looking weird?” Dorcas replied.

“Normally, no. But this is the kind of thing that would get back to Mum and Dad. It’s one thing to be concerned about the nargle population, it’s another to break societal norms.” 

“Ah, the nargle population! A real concern for wizard-kind!” Emma laughed.

You shook your head with a smirk. While the three of you often teased some of Pandora’s beliefs, you really loved her and her ways. You also knew it was part of why Xeno liked her. He shared quite a few of her beliefs and he entertained her tendencies to experiment with spells. 

“Anyways, I’m more concerned about what I’m going to wear rather than who’s going to ask me,” Dorcas said. “There’s Gladrags in Hogsmeade, but it’s going to be packed with every girl here. It honestly might be better to order from somewhere else.”

“But then you risk not liking it in person. And there’s not really enough time to return and reorder,” Emma pointed out.

“Ah, that’s why you order more than one dress from the jump. You’re bound to like one of the dresses you order.”

“Or you could just wear one of the dresses you already own?” you offered. 

Pandora and Emma fell into fits of laughter while Dorcas gave you a pitying smile.

“Love, we aren’t going to turn down an opportunity to get a new dress,” Dorcas said. 

You turned back to your breakfast. Part of you wanted to retort that it would be a waste of money to get a dress that you’d wear once, especially knowing they each had several extravagant dresses in their wardrobes. Then you remembered that they each came from far more prominent families than yours. They had money, status and endless ball invites outside of the castle walls. It was something you didn’t relate to. 

So you fell back into your silence. The girls continued with their discussion about the ball. They talked about who Dorcas and Emma hoped would ask them and their dream dresses. The boys on your other side weren’t discussing the dance as far as you could tell. 

“An erumpent would kill you faster than a skrewt,” Avery insisted. 

“You wish that were the case,” Wilkes said. 

“No, no, technically Avery’s right,” Barty said, waving his fork around. “Erumpent, once it decides to attack, will kill you fast, but blast-ended skrewts are vicious and it’ll be a painful death.” 

“What’re you saying, Junior?” Wilkes asked, turning to face the younger boy.

“That it’d be about the same time total, if the clock starts when you encounter the beast.” 

Death by various beasts was certainly… something to talk about over breakfast. You stared down at your plate. Neither conversation intrigued you. 

Then the hair on your neck stood up.

“Who do you think’ll ask Y/N YL/N? Surely another Slytherin, right?” a voice from behind you asked. 

Your eyes widened as you continued to stare at the food on your plate. Of all the people to be discussed, you didn’t think your name would come up. You assume it’s just out of your association with the other Slytherin girls. As likeable as you tried to be, your friends were higher on the popularity ladder. You tried to listen for the voice that said your name or perhaps whoever she was talking to, but you can’t single out that conversation. 

You had an inkling about who might ask you. Sirius Black. You didn’t share this with anyone around you though. They didn’t know you were anything more than polite to him, as you were to just about anyone. They didn’t know about the secret moments you had with him in empty classrooms, hidden corridors, the Astronomy Tower and the Room of Requirement. They didn’t know you and him were dating. Neither did his friends. 

When you and the rest of the girls got up to head to class, you looked towards the Gryffindor table and waved when you made eye contact with Sirius. He waved back. There were enough people still sitting at the four tables and enough leaving that the two of you would risk it. 

“Who’re you waving to?” Pandora asked, looking in the direction you waved. She couldn’t spot anyone you were particularly friendly towards. 

You rolled your eyes with a smile tugging at your lips.

“Can’t a girl have friends outside Slytherin?” 

“Well, yes, but-” Pandora started to say.

“Not nameless friends,” Emma finished for her.

“Nameless friends?” Wilkes asked, pushing his way in between Dorcas and Emma. “Shame their parents never named ‘em.”

“But you have to call them something. How else would they be enrolled here? They’d have to call you something at sorting,” Mulciber said.

“Maybe ‘Hey you’ sufficed?” Evan suggested. He slung his arm over your shoulder. 

“Right,” you drawled sarcastically. “‘Hey you’ is written on their birth certificate.” 

“There are worse things to be called,” Pandora said. 

---

As predicted, James did ask Lily a few days after the ball was announced. She shut him down very quickly. From the gossip you picked up, it sounded like some other guys were planning on shooting their shot with her. You weren’t surprised. She was beautiful and brilliant. 

With nothing more interesting to hold your attention, you ended up listening to more gossip, the who’s going with who. It had only been a few days but girls were getting asked left and right. Muliber was going Emma. Xeno was working you and Dorcas on his plan to ask Pandora. Remus asked Emmeline, which shocked some people. Peter asked Mary. 

You kept your ears open for mentions of Sirius. It didn’t sound like there were any rumors of him asking anyone, although some girls were debating what Pandora had suggested earlier, asking him themselves. Their reasoning was solid, in your opinion. It was Sirius Black! There was no way that he’d go to a dance alone when he could have pretty much any girl he wanted on his arm. 

And that’s what bugged you. So many girls liked him and none of them knew that he was off the market. When you made it official, he stopped flirting, but that didn’t stop him from being his charming self. Some things you can’t change. And some girls don’t know the difference between flirting and simply being kind and charming. 

You knew that there were reasons why you were keeping it a secret. Your friends and housemates would never let you hear the end of it if they knew, plus you risked being shut out by everyone in your house. While dating a Gryffindor in general wasn’t smiled upon, Sirius would be a sin. He was labeled as Blood Traitor #1. 

His friends didn’t know you. They wouldn’t approve and wouldn’t take the time to get to know you. Sirius knew that they would see you as a Slytherin who was no good, just like the rest of his family. They wouldn’t believe that you stood up for younger students against older ones, that you helped people find their way when the stairs changed on them, that you had a certain spark in you that set you apart. 

You both risked ostracization so you kept your relationship quiet. You told each other it was for the time being. You told each other that when it felt right, you’d break the news to your respective friend groups. You knew that as soon as he could tell his friends, you could tell yours. If his accepted you, it didn’t matter if yours resented you; whereas if yours accepted him, it would still matter to him what his friends thought. It was just the reality of it. 

You considered talking to Sirius about the ball the next time you met up. Maybe this would be the time. You could spend the evening with his friends, convince them that you weren’t so bad. 

You let the thought linger in your mind as you waited for Professor McGonagall to dismiss the class. She finished her lecture a few minutes ago and told the class to practice turning cutlery into different apparatuses. Few students actually listened to her. Most were idly chatting. 

“I think Sirius is going to ask McKinnon to the dance,” a voice nearby said. 

Your breath hitched. What? There was no way he would ask her. You trained your eyes on your notes, hoping the girl would continue her thoughts.

“Oh, they would be so cute together! Shame though, I know Shannon was hoping that he’d ask her.”

“Has he ever talked to Shan?” 

“No but a girl can dream, can’t she?”

“I s’pose. But be real! Marlene and Sirius are always with each other. They got chemistry on another level.”

You swallowed thickly at the girls’ comments. It was the first time that you heard anything substantial about Sirius. They had a name and reason to think so. You have never thought about Marlene being interested in Sirius. From what you knew, you had no reason to be worried about her. At least, you didn’t. 

Their comment settled in your stomach and festered. You felt small for the rest of your lessons. You drummed your fingers against your thigh in every class, trying to pay attention but ultimately failing. Your eyes drifted to Sirius or Marlene in each lesson. You hated how much it bugged you, how much you were letting it get to you. 

You couldn’t bring yourself to look toward the Gryffindor table during dinner. If Marlene was sitting within two people of Sirius, you’re positive that you would’ve thrown up. You tried to keep reminding yourself that Sirius liked you. That he was going out with you. That if he was going to take anyone to the dance, he’d be taking you. 

But Marlene was better. She would be someone that Sirius wouldn’t have to hide from his friends. He wouldn’t have to worry if they would approve, she was already one of them. She had nothing to prove. You? You have everything to prove. 

You kept your head down throughout the whole meal. The ball had made its way into the boys’ conversation so even their usual demented topics couldn’t save you. They were teasing each other, those who had dates for being saps and those who didn’t for being cowards. 

“There’s no one I’d want to go with,” Severus said monotonously, keeping his head low.

“Because that mudblood isn’t talking to you anymore,” Avery responded. 

Lily had stopped talking to Severus at the end of last year. It didn’t go unnoticed that he had tried to apologize and win her back, ultimately failing. The boys didn’t let him forget his softness for the girl, especially given her blood status. 

The girls had moved more deeply into their considerations for what to wear. They talked silhouettes, necklines, sleeves, colors, jewelry, shoes and every other accessory. It was every single detail of outfits they had yet to purchase. You assumed that you could just figure it all out when you inevitably went to Gladrags one weekend. 

You didn’t last long at the table. Your mind was set on your meeting with Sirius. You exited the Great Hall by yourself and took a deep breath as soon as you were outside the stifling warmth. You barely made it to the first flight of stairs when you heard your name being called. 

You turned around. “Rosier?” 

He jogged to catch up to you. 

“You’ve been pretty quiet lately,” he said once standing next to you.

You cocked an eyebrow at him and crossed your arms.

“Define lately.” 

He smiled at you. “Well, always. But especially when the dance comes up.”

“Nothing to add, I guess.”

“Why’s that? Seems like every girl has an opinion.”

You shrugged. “Not even sure if I’m going.”

“Again, why’s that?” 

“Not expecting anyone to ask me,” you said slowly, almost regretting it so you kept talking. “And, I mean, it’s no secret that Emma, Dorcas and your families are more… well off than mine. Balls aren’t… something I’m used to.”

Evan opened his mouth to respond but he was cut off.

“There you are, Mr. Rosier!” Professor Slughorn’s voice boomed. “Come on, boy. We need to discuss your career potential!” 

“Shit,” he grumbled. “I’ll find you later, yeah?” 

You gave him a soft, almost-pitying smile as he turned toward Slughorn. You watched him walk away with the short professor before continuing on your way to the seventh floor. You were grateful for Slughorn in that moment. You assumed that Evan was building up to asking you. Thankfully, he never got the question out and now you would be able to talk to Sirius first. You needed to figure out what was going on with you two and the ball. 

You climbed staircase after staircase. Thoughts of Evan’s unasked question and the rumors of Sirius possibly asking Marlene bounced around in your mind. You yearned for the privacy of the Room of Requirement. You couldn’t wait for Sirius to meet you there. You leaned against the wall and let yourself sink to the ground. You knew it would be a while before he showed up; you had left dinner a bit early and he couldn’t just leave his friends with no reason and avoid being questioned in depth later. The coldness of the stone floor was more than welcomed as you waited. 

You perked up the moment you heard his distinctive footsteps approaching. You jumped up, waiting for the door to appear. You slipped inside, Sirius following only moments after. 

He pulled you into a tight hug before pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“Merlin, I missed you,” he mumbled against your hair.

“I see you in class all day,” you replied with faux-snark.

“Yeah, where the most I can do is wink at you,” he said as his hands rubbed your back.

You melted into his arms. His cologne filled your brain with every inhale. It was enough to make your thoughts go fuzzy. Momentarily, you forgot about Evan, Marlene, the ball and all the gossip that accompanied it. But as soon as he lets you go and takes a step toward the couch and fireplace, they come flooding back. You blame their return on how prominent the ball was in everyone’s conversation. And if you thought on it, you knew that if Sirius was truly asking Marlene, it would be okay for you to go with Evan. 

“Darling, you joining me?” Sirius asked from the couch with his arms held out, ready to hold you close again. 

You nodded and wordlessly moved to join him. He held you close and nestled his face into the crook of your neck. It was comfortable. It was nice. It was everything you needed after days of listening to gossip. He could’ve been seeking out any other girl, but he was here, hiding in the Room of Requirement because he missed you. 

“Long day?” he whispered.

He could feel how tense you were. With every passing second, you relaxed deeper into his arms, but he knew something was eating at your mind. You sighed. 

“Long week.”

He hummed. “Want to talk about it?” 

“Just the ball, Sirius. ‘S all.” 

“That’s all, huh?” 

“Mhmm. The girls refuse to talk about anything else.”

“Any of them got dates?”

“You know Lovegood, from Ravenclaw?” 

He hummed again. 

“Well, he’s asking Dora tomorrow. He’s got a whole thing planned. Vanity and Mulciber are going together. I’m sure Dorcas will get asked any day now.”

“And you?” he asked with a playful tone.

You lightly elbowed his side. 

“I did want to talk to you about that,” Sirius said, sounding more sincere. 

You couldn’t bring yourself to move. You knew you should adjust how you were sitting in his arms so that you could see his face. But you couldn’t. All your muscles felt too tight and air wasn’t properly filling your lungs. You didn’t expect to feel this way. You knew he wasn’t ready to show you off to his friends, and ultimately the whole school, but it still hurt to imagine him dancing with someone else. 

“I… I know you’re planning on asking Marlene,” you manage to say, earning a shocked cough from Sirius. “It… It’s okay. I think that Evan Rosier wants to ask me. I mean, it won’t be the same as going with you, but he’s a friend. It’ll be a… tolerable evening.” 

“Love, what?” Sirius asked, confusing lacing his words as he sat up and turned your body so he could see your face. “Who? What? Marlene? No.” 

Your voice got stuck in your throat. Your mouth moved with no sound. It was the perfect visual of confusion. 

“Rosier? You’re going to go with Rosier?” he asked, his voice quiet with disbelief.

“He… he hasn’t asked yet. And if you’re going with McKinnon…” Talking felt so difficult. 

“No. I’m not asking McKinnon. Where did you hear that?” He immediately held up his hand as you opened your mouth to speak. “Actually, that doesn’t matter. It’s not true. James. James is the one who’s going to ask her.”

“James?” 

Sirius laughed. It was a warm sound that made your heart do flips. 

“James is going to ask Marlene since they both can’t go with who they really want to go with.”

You took a moment to compose yourself. Obviously, James wanted to go with Lily. 

“Who does Marlene want to go with?” 

“It’s not my place to tell, love. It is my place to tell you that I’d like to go with you.”

You pressed your lips together before pulling one between your teeth.

“But your friends…?” 

He leaned forward to press a kiss to your forehead.

“My friends have figured out that I’m seeing someone. Apparently, I disappear too often-” with the Marauders’ Map “-with consistently horrible excuses,” he told you. 

Even when you met up in the Room of Requirement which doesn’t show up on the map, Sirius made sure to take it with him. He hadn’t been ready to tell them about you. Part of him still didn’t want to. That part liked having you solely to himself. It liked sneaking around and the thrill of having a secret. But the rest of him knew it wasn’t sustainable. 

Sirius watched your face for a hint of how you were feeling, and your face said you were unconvinced. 

“They know when I’m lying… and…” Sirius’ face flushed. “They said I’ve had a lovesick look on my face far too often for there not to be a girl.” 

He knew that that would convince you. A grin took over your face.

“A lovesick look?” you repeated teasingly. “You’ve had a lovesick look on your face?”

“When I come back from being with you. And whenever I think about you. Especially when I think about kissing you-” He pressed a kiss to your nose. “-and how beautiful you are-” A kiss to your forehead. “-and how funny-” A kiss to your cheek. “-and how brilliant-” A kiss to your jaw. “-and kind-” A kiss to your neck. “-and perfect.” He continued peppering kisses down your neck and onto your collarbone. 

You threw your head back with giggles spilling out of your mouth. The jealousy you felt about the idea of Sirius with Marlene dissolved into nothingness. You placed your hands on the sides of Sirius’ face to hold him away from you for a moment. 

“If Rosier gets around to asking me, I’ll tell him I already have a date,” you said before connecting your lips to Sirius’. 

“Good,” he mumbled through the kiss. 

---

“Padfoot!” James yelled as soon as Sirius returned to the Gryffindor Common Room later that evening. “Where the hell have you been?” 

Sirius couldn’t wipe the pleased smirk off of his face. He strode over to the couches by the fire and collapsed unceremoniously next to James. 

“Asking my girl to the ball.”

Both Lily and Remus sat up from their respective chairs nearby at that. Remus leaned toward the couches as much as he could without getting up.

“So you’ll tell us who it is then?”

“He has a girl? Like a committed relationship?” Lily gasped. 

“Oh, Evans, you’re here. Erm, yeah. I do. And you’ll figure out who it is when I walk into the dance with the hottest date.” 

Remus slouched back into his chair at that. Ever since they got him to confess that he had been going to see a girl, singular, the same one each time, the three boys had been dogging him about it. They searched for any hint, any clue, an inkling of an idea as to who you were. They had… nothing. Well, nothing besides that you weren’t a Gryffindor. They were fairly certain that Sirius wouldn’t be so secretive about you if you were a Gryffindor. 

“Seriously making us wait until Christmas to know who you’ve been sneaking around with?” James groaned. 

Sirius nodded. “I am Sirius, after all. Got to live up to the name.” 

Peter threw a crumpled piece of parchment at Sirius.

“Black, how is this the first I’m hearing of this?” Lily asked as she turned her full body to be facing the couches. “How long have you been in a committed relationship?”

“Oh, don’t feel bad, Lily,” Peter said from the armchair. “We only found out like a week or so ago.”

“Black?” she repeated.

He ran a hand through his hair before looking at Lily. 

“Made it official at the start of term.”

Lily gasped, grabbed her own bit of parchment to crumple and toss at Sirius.

“Oi! I am not a rubbish bin!”

“You are too when you’ve been seeing someone since September!”

“It gets worse the longer you think about it,” Remus pointed out. “They made it official in September. Meaning they were flirting and whatever for some time before.”

“Merlin… And you lot have no clue who it is?” 

“Nope,” Sirius answered for them, looking satisfied with himself. 

“Why not?” Lily pressed. She looked like she was about to move her chair closer to the couch so she could properly interrogate Sirius about his girlfriend. 

“Yeah, why not? You’ve never given a good answer,” James said, sitting up a bit. 

The four of them had their eyes glued to Sirius, watching his every move as he tried to think of something that wouldn’t give too much away. 

“It… would… ruffle some feathers. It will ruffle some feathers. But, we figured the ball is a good time to go public. So you’ll wait until then.” 

Lily narrowed her eyes at Sirius. The gears in her head were spinning. She put away the homework she had been working on. There was no way she could focus now, not with this mystery brought to her attention. There was a girl in the school with Sirius all to herself. This girl got Sirius to mature enough to commit. Lily needed to know who it was. 

---

You listened with more intent the next time that Emma, Dorcas and Pandora brought up the dance. Xeno asked Pandora and she obviously said yes. Dorcas was asked by Bertram Aubrey, not her first choice but a respectable one as Pandora and Emma assured her. You hadn’t gotten around to mentioning that you had a date to the girls. It wasn’t like they asked you either. 

You started asking their opinions on what color would look best, which silhouette fits your body shape, how to accessorize. It was a slight sprinkling of questions. Their excited answers told you that they were happy you were finally taking an interest in the ball.

“Honestly, I wasn’t sure if you were even going to go,” Emma told you. “You seemed pretty against it for a while.”

“I mean, I was debating not going. Wasn’t sure if it was my type of event.”

“What changed your mind?” 

“Oh, did Evan finally ask you?” Pandora asked, joining the conversation. 

You looked at her with wide eyes and shook your head. “Erm, no. Guess he never got ‘round to it…” You pause to take a steadying breath. “Would you mind telling him that I already have a date?” 

“I’m not lying to him. If you’re not interested, you have to tell him!” Pandora said defensively. 

“No, I really already have a date,” you said, hoping that you sounded genuine. 

Which you were. You just needed the girls to know what you were without saying that Sirius was your date. He had told you that he wouldn’t tell his friends until the ball and if you told your friends, word would spread fast. 

“Who? You’ve never mentioned…” Emma asked, twisting her features in confusion. 

“It’s… a surprise. I promise I have a real date. He’s very real. Just… not a Slytherin.”

“No. Come on, out with it,” Pandora said, placing her hands on her hips. “Ev is a perfectly fine bloke. You can handle an evening with him.”

“I totally agree with you, Dora. But I already have a date and I plan on attending the ball with him.” 

You looked between the two girls. You weren’t lying, so why did they seem so insistent on believing that you were? You didn’t have anything against him. You knew that they knew that. You just didn’t want to have the awkward conversation of telling him you were already going with someone if Pandora, or Emma really, could’ve passed on the message for you. 

Then Dorcas appeared at your side and you instantly gave her a pleading look.

“Dorcas! Would you tell Evan not to ask me to the ball?” you asked.

“Why would I do that? Don’t you want a date? We all have dates.” 

You threw your head back with a groan.

“I already have a date. These two don’t believe me and I really, really don’t want to be the one who has to tell Evan.”

“Tell me what?” a male voice said from behind you.

“Ev!” Pandora exclaimed. “Man of the hour! She has something to tell you.”

“Let’s go, give ‘em some privacy,” Emma said, grabbing Pandora and Dorcas’ arms. 

“No!” you practically cried as they disappeared around the corner of the corridor, leaving you alone with Evan. You groaned. 

“Damn, am I that horrible to be around?” he asked nervously.

“No, you’re not,” you said, feeling horrible already. “That’s the problem. You’re really a fine bloke.”

“Oh,” he said, his voice dropping. “I think I know where this is going… It’s not you, it’s me.” He laughed dryly. “I didn’t even have to ask.”

“Evan… It’s just that I’ve already been asked.”

“But, just the other day… When Slughorn pulled me away… You said…”

“I didn’t think he would ask.”

He let out an exasperated sigh. “Didn’t you know that I was going to ask you? Why’d you say yes to someone else if you knew I was about to ask you if fucking Slughorn-?”

You hated the feeling in your chest. It was horrible. You had to explain to him that it was more than just someone else asking. 

“I’ve been seeing someone. In private. I wasn’t sure if we were going to go and… well, we’ve decided to go.” 

“Oh,” he said, suddenly more curious than feeling bad for himself. “So private that even Dora doesn’t know?”

“No one knows. And, I’d like to keep it that way.” 

Evan studied your face. He sighed and let his expression drop to a blank canvas. Then he walked away. You weren’t sure how to feel about it. You wished he had said something before walking away, instead of just leaving your request sit in the air. You stood there for a moment before deciding to go to the library. You figured no one would bug you there and you could just think about how you were going to navigate everything once you showed up to the ball on Sirius’ arm. 

---

Despite the near incessant pestering from your respective friend groups, neither you nor Sirius broke down. The main difference between your friend groups was that the Gryffindors fully believed that you existed. They were certain that there was a girl that Sirius kept sneaking off to spend time with. Your friends didn’t believe Sirius existed. Surely, they would’ve noticed not only sneaking off but the emotional changes from you. To avoid making them see that they might be bad friends, you repeatedly told them that you’re just that good of an actress. What’s the point of a secret relationship if everyone knows about it? 

The girls had helped you pick out a lovely black dress that made you look divine. They offered you some of their accessories when you put your foot down at spending a fortune on a matching set of diamond earrings and necklace. It was safe to say that you looked goddamn amazing as you twirled in front of the mirror in your dorm.

Emma, Dorcas and Pandora showered you in compliments and slight jabs at keeping your date a mystery.

“We’re going to see who it is in just a few minutes. Why can’t you tell us?” Pandora asked as she slid another hairpin in place. 

“It’s the principle of it,” you reminded her. “Are we ready?” 

You led the girls out of your dorm and into the common room, where Emma and Dorcas’ dates were waiting for them. You smiled at Evan and his date, a younger Slytherin who beamed up at him. Looking around the dimly lit room, it appeared that many Slytherins chose dates from their own house. You hooked arms with Pandora and continued walking to the door. If Emma and Dorcas wanted to linger in the common room with their dates, that was their choice. You had a date from a different house.

Sirius was the first one ready, which surprised the rest of the Marauders. They had figured that Remus would’ve been the first, followed by Peter and James with Sirius coming in last. He paced the dorm as he waited for someone else to be ready.

“Padfoot, calm down. Your jitters are contagious,” Peter said, struggling to figure out his cufflinks. “Actually, come here. You clearly know how these work.”

Sirius was more than happy to oblige. It was something to do. He was nervous to finally go public with his relationship with you. He knew that one evening was all his friends needed with you before they realized how amazing you are and would accept you into the group. He just needed this evening to go well. He didn’t want to think about what could all go wrong, which is where his mind kept drifting to every time the dorm fell quiet as the boys dressed and made their final adjustments. 

“Why are you so nervous, Pads? You’ve been dating this girl for months,” James asked as they left their dorm.

Sirius didn’t answer right away. He didn’t want to admit out loud that he was nervous they wouldn’t like you.

“Just a big night.”

“Make note of it, boys,” Remus said with a smirk. “Padfoot won’t be this nervous again until his wedding day.” 

James and Peter laughed while Sirius rolled his eyes. In the common room, couples were meeting up. The girls saw the boys come down the stairs and joined them quickly. 

“Who’d you end up saying yes to?” Remus asked Lily.

She shot a nervous look toward James, but he was already in a new fit of laughter with Marlene as they awkwardly exchanged flowers. 

“Thomas Boot.”

“Oh, maybe he’ll come down with Emmeline! Shall we?” he said, offering his arm to Lily.

She agreed and Sirius followed the two of them out of the room. 

You had agreed to meet up with Sirius outside the Great Hall. Just about every other inter-house couple had the same idea as people gathered outside the large doors. From a distance, you could see the silvery glow emitted from the Great Hall. Snow appeared to be falling out of the doors but never reaching the head of the tallest student. As you got closer, you could see the enchanted icicles and hear the light music that was already playing. 

Pandora started bouncing on the balls of her feet as she scanned the crowd for Xenophilius. As soon as she saw him, she bid you a quick bye before darting in his direction. You bit your lip as you tried to spot Sirius. Your heart was already pounding in your chest. 

This was it. There was no going back to the safety of your private relationship after this moment. You would have to deal with the fallout with your friends and all the harsh words they’d have to say about Sirius. And you’d have to deal with whatever Sirius’ friends had to say about you. You hoped they were kind and compassionate people that Sirius described them as being. 

“Darling, you look… wow. Just wow,” Sirius said, having found you while you were lost in thought.

Worries? You didn’t have any worries.

Sirius’ words brought a blush to your cheeks and a smile to your lips. He had a hand held out for you to grab. You took it and he pulled you close. 

“I have never seen someone look so spectacular,” he murmured against your ear. “How did I get so lucky?” 

“An insane amount of luck,” you teased.

You pulled out of his space for a moment to give him a once over. 

“Rumors are true. You do know how to clean up,” you said before moving back to his side and letting him steer you inside the Great Hall.

“Maybe one good thing did come out of all those balls I was forced to attend in my youth,” he sighed.

You giggled. “You’re still in your youth, you idiot.”

“Oh,” he mock-gasped. “Then maybe we can make another good thing come out of the balls of my youth.”

“What would you like out of this ball, Mr. Black?” 

“The whole castle to know that you’re mine.” 

“Well, we do seem to be headed in the right way for that.” “Fantastic!”

Sirius didn’t leave your side for most of the night. He was glued to your side before the dancing and partying really started, as you milled around the drink and snack tables. His friends found you first. 

“You’re the girl who’s got Padfoot smitten?” Peter gasped. 

You nodded, too nervous to trust your voice. Sirius tightened his grip on your waist to ground you. He knew how much you both had been worrying about this moment. 

“Whose idea was it to keep you a secret?” James asked, looking from Sirius’ face to his hand holding your waist to your shaky smile.

“Yeah, really. Heard from Lily that you’ve been dating all term?” Marlene added.

“I-I think I brought it and he agreed,” you said. Your voice wobbled a little, but you told yourself it would steady as you talked more with the group.

“Where’s Moony and Vance?” James asked, craning his head to look around the hall. “He’s not going to believe this.”

“What’s not to believe?” Sirius asked, sounding affronted. 

“That you got a pretty little Slytherin under your arm, Pads.”

You tensed. There it was. Throwing your house out there like it was a definition of who you were.

“And what about it?” Sirius snapped.

James looked back at Sirius and you with his eyebrows raised. 

“Nothing. Nothing!” James chuckled uncomfortably. “We just… might have… maybe… placed bets on who it was.”

“And we all lost,” Peter added. 

“So who gets the money then? Us?” you asked. 

“I think we should, darling. Mates, how much do we get for being unpredictable?” 

James and Peter groaned in unison. Meeting Remus and Lily resulted in similar amounts of shock that you were a Slytherin but then moved on quickly to jokes. Lily seemed most interested in how you and Sirius came to be, which you told her was probably a conversation saved for another time. You gestured to the ball and she nodded. 

“That wasn’t so bad,” Sirius said as you two made the your way to the dance floor. 

“Think they like me? Or at least tolerate me?” 

“Love, you didn’t bat an eye at the boys betting on who you were. They love you already.” He spun you around before pulling you into him, your back pressed to his chest so he could whisper into your ear, “But they’ll never love you as much as I love you.”

You stumbled as Sirius began to spin you again. Then you were chest to chest.

“Say it again,” you said breathlessly. You couldn’t believe what you heard. 

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Before Sirius could spin you or dip you or do anything to move you away from his face, you kissed him. It was a moment filled with pure bliss. You were dancing with your boyfriend, kissing him, in public, both looking beautiful, and he just told you that he loved you for the first time. It was perfect.

“It’s fucking Black?” Emma’s voice screeched. 

You pulled back. Both you and Sirius turned to see your roommate looking at you with utter bewilderment in her eyes. Mulciber, who was holding onto her waist, had a look of disgust etched into his face as he took in the scene before him. 

“No wonder you didn’t tell anyone,” she snarled before dragging Mulciber in the opposite direction.

You assumed that she was off to tell everyone else who hadn’t seen you yet. You really hoped that Dorcas and Pandora would take the revelation better. If not, your dorm was about to become the most uncomfortable room in the entire castle, save maybe the common room. 

“If they kick you out of Slytherin, we’ll smuggle you into our tower,” Sirius told you, trying to comfort you.

Your distress was evident on your face. As much as Sirius’ offer lessened it slightly, it was only slightly. You still had another year and a half in this dorm and even if you and Sirius broke up at some point, Emma wouldn’t forget it. 

Then Pandora and Xenophilius appeared next to you.

“Treat her well, Black,” Pandora warned. Then her voice softened as she acknowledged you. “We’ll deal with Vanity later. Enjoy your night.” 

When they disappeared, you relaxed. If Pandora, the one who had been trying to set you up with her brother, could accept Sirius that easily, then Dorcas would follow. Or at least it would be two against two in the dorm. Having one girl in your corner was enough to ease your mind and allow you to enjoy the rest of your night with Sirius.

Dorcas did find you later in the night. She was mumbling about how Aubrey was an utter buffoon and she never should’ve agreed to go with him in the first place. 

She gave Sirius one look before saying, “At least you got a hot one…”

You and Sirius broke out in laughter once Dorcas bolted again with a quick mention of seeing Aubrey coming. Sirius left you with his friends as he went to get drinks. As he had predicted, his friends warmed up to you quickly. You were welcomed into their circle as they bantered with each other, their contagious laughter filling the air. 

After he turned with the drinks, Sirius was with you until he walked you back to the Slytherin Dungeon. Echoes of laughter and faint music filled the corridors as you descended down flights of stairs. 

“Overall, I’d say it was a rather successful night,” Sirius said.

“Successfully a second good thing to come from your youthful balls?” 

Sirius snickered. “Youthful balls.”

You shoved his shoulder while joining in his laughter. 

“You’re a child.”

“A youth, a child. Same thing, right?”

“Apparently so,” you said, unable to prevent yourself from smiling. 

“Well, good night my love,” he said before kissing your cheek. “If it becomes too much down here, password’s feriae munera.” 

Your chest warmed at his offering of the Gryffindor Tower. A ‘just in case’ for the sake of Emma and the rest of the Slytherins who thought Sirius was barely a step above muggle borns. Sirius was the best thing you could’ve asked for.

“Good night, love.”

[so-much-for-the-seashells]

The Fun Kind of Sparring

Soldier Boy (The Boys) x Reader

Minors do ¡NOT! interact. This is not for you.

A/N: I haven’t seen the Boys and won’t BUTT that finale, amirite??? So in honor of the glorious return of Jensen Ackles, maybe the finest man who’s ever existed- seriously, when the aliens invade, show them him and they’ll be besotted by his beauty- I wrote this for all y’all SB lovers. Just note that I do not endorse any of this man’s actions, and if you do… the fuck?

I think it goes without saying but this is not my picture, it belongs to EW. (Too tired to make icons 💪)

Anyways, icons by me and all interaction-especially commentary- is appreciated!

Content/Content Warning: straight filth. The mouth on this man is crazy. Diddle that skittle.

****************************************************

It really had just been sparring. A little one on one, if you will. Me and Soldier Boy. Soldier Boy and me.

If it were anyone else, being pinned down to the ground would be the opposite of erotic. It would be annoying, and I’d be flailing around, trying to hit my partner in the balls.

But with Soldier Boy? We’d been skirting around each other since The Boys broke him out. Well, that’s a lie. I’ve been skirting around him, he’s made it more than a little obvious that he’s into me. I don’t know if it’s that he just wants a quick lay or what, but because I’m unfortunately attracted to him, I don’t really care.

Especially right now, when I’m pinned under him on the gym mat.

“Y’know, we shouldn’t do this,” I stall, no meaning behind my words.

“Sure, sweetheart,” he humors me. His lips are mere inches away from mine, his hair falling against my forehead. And I think I’m drunk on the scent of his pungent aftershave.

“I mean, you’re like, what, 103?” I ponder aloud, trying to distract myself from the fact that the Soldier Boy is rested over me in a plank, shirtless. That I can feel his warm breath on my face. That it smells like peppermints.

“104, actually, sweets,” he corrects. He’s had this shot-eating grin plastered on his face since he managed to wrestle me down, because like me, he knows exactly how this is going to end. But unlike me, he’s not remotely hesitant about showing it. And because he’s a jerk, he’s making me make the first move. But I’m not ready quite yet.

“104, right,” I mutter. “Older than my grandpa.”

“Smart girl,” he just goes along with everything I’m saying, letting me stall. The mischievous glint in his emerald colored eyes never ceases.

I nod slowly. “You are a very attractive grandpa,” I state, my tone far away as if I’m talking about him while he isn’t on top of me. Ohhh do I want him on top. You know what I mean.

“Thanks, sugar. But I think I’d prefer ‘Daddy’ if we’re going for the titles,” he says cheekily, still making no moves. I on the other hand am blushing the brightest red. Between the nicknames and Daddy, it’s too much to handle.

“O-oh,” I stutter, swallowing thickly. “Noted. But, uh, aren’t you more into… more mature women?”

“I believe all women are mature. I don’t discriminate, sweets,” he says, his shit-eating grin somehow eating more shit.

“Very feminist of you,” I say sarcastically.

“Damn straight,” he agrees.

I bite my lower lip. “You’re very experienced, right?”

“Not to toot my own horn or anything, but yes, I’d say so,” I can tell that he can tell that I can tell that this is volatile, just moments from going somewhere.

“Okay, so I guess my last question is this: how would you go about it. Y’know? With someone that you hypothetically wouldn’t treat as someone you paid for? That you’re sort of friends with?” I have to know. I’m too nervous for him not to lay it out plain and simple for me, I need to mentally prepare myself.

“Well, firstly, I think I’d have to know my girl likes it,” he gives me a pointed look.

“Your hypothetical girl,” I correct.

“Sure, my hypothetical girl,” he agrees. How has he not broken a single sweat this entire time? He’s been in a plank over me for the last however long it’s been and it doesn’t even affect him??

Quit getting distracted.

“Maybe she likes it rough. She wants to feel it for a few days,” I suggest, feeling my stomach knot at the notion. I’d been consistently growing wetter since he put me under him, and my arousal shows no signs of stopping.

“Okay, so I’d give it to her rough. Work her up until she’s begging for it… maybe I’ll- I mean, I’d- use my mouth first, taste her pretty pussy before I get my dick wet.” It’s all I can do not to moan at the dirty words falling out of his plush lips. Not to mention his honeyed transatlantic 50s accent… I’m so fucked. In so many ways. “Probably get her to come at least once, cause I’m sure she tastes as sweet as she looks.”

“Uh huh,” I mumble, the sound coming out higher than it should as I look at him with wide, attentive eyes.

“Don’t get me wrong, even before then I’d be marking her up and down. So that way everyone can see who made her feel so good, who got her walking so funny,” he backtracks. And again, the notion is far too good to be true. But the promise in his voice? It’s real. “I’d have to get her ready for my cock, stretch her out with my fingers. Start with one, but she’d be so wet that that wouldn’t even do anything. She’d be begging for more if I just did two, so I’ll give her three, make that needy cunt happy,” he muses. And it’s so, so erotic. And I’m ready to just lean up and kiss him, make him do all the things he says. But I’m captivated by his words, his narration- I think I could come from it alone. “I don’t know if I’d let her come again then. Because I think she’d be begging for my dick with how good my fingers feel stuffed in her tight pussy.”

Mother. Fucking. Hell. Oh. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. He shouldn’t be real. These words should be banned from his vocabulary, because I am on fire right now.

“Where do you think this hypothetical girl would want me to come?” he asks out of curiosity, smirking. Probably at the way I’m looking at him like a bitch in heat.

“In her,” I mumble.

“In her where?” he asks smugly, knowing the answer but wanting to hear it.

“Ben,” I whine in protest.

“Oh, c’mon, tell me,” he chides. “For the sake of the story.”

“In my-her-pussy,” I answer in a breathy whisper.

“Good girl,” he praises, and it’s all I can do not to keen. I have to be soaked through my shorts by now, there’s no way. “Well, what I’d do next… that’s simple. I’d fuck her until she cried, and then I’d keep going. And I’d keep going until the only thing she can remember is my name, until she’s gooey and clingy and a sweet little fucked out thing, all for me,” he finishes, his grin from before returning back to his face. I’m losing it. I can’t think straight. And yet- he’s still waiting for me to make the first move. Son of a bitch.

“O-okay,” I clear my throat, unable to find my senses. “And if that hypothetical girl was me?” We both know it’s me, I just need to hear it.

“Well in that case I think I’d be the luckiest bastard who ever lived,” he says sincerely, looking at me with a gaze that can only be described as pure adoration and lust. Yep. That’s it for me. I lean up and kiss him with as much force as I can muster.

****************************************************

In the meantime… want more Soldier Boy?? Try Taming The Supe <3

[merakiui]

Helloooo! I’d like to order a flower bouquet + strawberry ice cream from the misc. menu as well as some lemon squares + custard donuts from the midnight menu for Scaramouche <3

yandere!scaramouche x (gender neutral) reader cw: yandere, nsfw, dub-con, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, friends with benefits, forced pregnancy/baby-trapping (no pronouns; reader has a pussy), modern college au note - thank you for checking in, dearest guest! enjoy your order! [lunar love hotel]

You’re writing a paper.

Sitting at your desk, scrolling through clothes online, you wonder if your meager paycheck will cover the shipping costs. This is all research. Research that is very necessary in the paper-drafting process, of course! You click on an outfit just as Scaramouche looks up from his phone.

Correction. You’re trying to write a paper.

“Great progress. I can really see the thought you put into this.”

“I’m envisioning it as we speak.”

“Yeah? Doesn’t seem to be getting you anywhere.” He sets his phone down and leans closer. “Last I checked you’re not writing about clothes.”

“Last I checked,” you say, mocking him, “I didn’t ask for commentary. Don’t you have anything better to do?” 

A smug smile sharpens on his face. “I can think of a few things.”

Groaning, you shove him away. “No way. Not today.”

“Why not? It didn’t seem to bother you that last time when we did it before your lecture. You were so out of it you didn’t want me to leave you alone. Isn’t that right, sweetheart?”

“Not my fault I was tired! Don’t tell me you’ve never said and done stupid things when you’re running on three hours of sleep.”

“Not once,” he declares, looking quite proud. As if it’s some grand achievement. Does he want an award? “And even if I was, I wouldn’t be reduced to sugary, sappy putty.”

“I called you ‘sweetheart’ once by mistake. Get over it.”

Scaramouche rests his elbow on the desk, his cheek in his hand. “I don’t think I want to.”

Shutting your laptop, you turn in your chair to face him. “And I don’t think I want to fuck you today.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Oh, you’re gonna do all the work?”

“That’s the plan. Be grateful I’m so good to you,” he teases, leaning closer and closer until—

You block your lips before he can capture them. “I really can’t today. Paper aside, I don’t have any protection and I’m not on birth control right now.”

“It doesn’t have to be inside.” He sits back in his chair, exuding casual confidence. “Unless you want to risk it.”

You try to put enough ice in your glare, but it melts quickly. You really shouldn’t. It’s not a safe day. You really, really shouldn’t…

Scaramouche raises a brow, waiting for your reply.

Despite everything, you’re wheedled into it anyway. You’re not even sure what you want. Is it yes or no? It’s been months since you fell into this arrangement with him—the campus’s infamous lone wolf who goes out of his way to make himself unapproachable. Or, according to your friends, he’s more of a lonely stray cat in need of a friend. Scaramouche had scoffed when you told him that.

Your friends are idiots, he said with a scowl. It only made him look even more like a grumpy cat in need of companionship. Not that you’d ever tell him that. It would only serve to stoke the flames of his ire.

But right now, looking up at him while he ruts into you, sweat sticking in all the right places, his hair falling over his eyes, you’re inclined to agree with that observation. There’s a depth to his gaze that draws you in, a sad glimmer hiding behind the ardor. There’s never been any attachment outside of the bedroom. You’re not even sure if he considers you a friend.

Still, you wonder…

“Scara, do you—” You cut yourself off with a startled gasp, your nails curling into his shoulders. He’s holding you down by your hips, fucking into you like the world’s about to end. “S-Slow down. Wait, I—aah—oh!”

He sucks in a staggered breath through grit teeth, his jaw set firmly. “You’re never going to leave me.”

Your brain stalls out, and suddenly you’re not sure how to respond. He doesn’t lessen the brutal pace at which he thrusts, so you’re forced to piece together a half-coherent answer amidst your groans.

“N-Not anytime soon—mmh… Why? What’s up?”

Scaramouche lifts his head from your neck. A strange smile turns the corners of his lips up. “It’s not a question. I wasn’t giving you a choice.”

You blink back at him, lust-drunk and dazed. The horror edges in, slow and steady like invasive rot. It isn’t until he’s pinning your legs up by your ears to force you into another position that the implication finally catches up to you. You claw at his back with weak strokes, babbling futile protests against his mouth. In response, his cock throbs inside of you, pressed so deep in this position you fear the repercussions. He kisses you with much the same force, insistent on driving you into the mattress—on pinning you here until you finally submit. Until the last of your resolve withers away, stamped out and replaced with something agreeable.

“Even if you wanted to,” he says around a shaky laugh, seeming positively deranged, “you couldn’t.”

You think you should be worried, but you’re so stunned with this development that your brain can’t keep up. Embarrassingly, you cum with a strangled sort of cry, your pussy clenching tight. He hisses through his teeth, fucks you through the high of your orgasm, and then falls with you, his own climax fast like a flash.

You’re panting in the aftermath. What just happened?

Scaramouche keeps you plugged with his cock for as long as he possibly can before he’s sliding out, flaccid and spent. For now, you suspect, for there will certainly be more later if your wits aren’t about you by then.

“Pill,” you mumble, voice hoarse from crying. You shake him, hoping he’ll climb off of you and get to it. “Scaraaa…”

Oddly, for someone who never shows any vulnerability, he clings. “We’ve got time. I’ll get it. Don’t worry.”

You don’t believe him. Not when his hand strays to your stomach. His palm brushes over the area once. He sighs, wholly satisfied.

“We’ve got time…”

Nine months of it, in fact. But that goes unspoken. If not today, there’s always tomorrow. You know he won’t rest until then. Neither will you. Your heart is too big, too soft, for that lonely stray cat, and part of you wonders if he knows that.

[frudoo]

Ahh finished reaidng and the end of the baker Simon update I feel like, idk if reader works in like some marketing agency maybe in an office but like she suggests taking them to the people she works with and they all love Simon after that because who doesn’t love being fed baked goods?? And they encourage her to date him (def not so they get more treats in the future 🤭)

Or even they take them to somewhere like a first station to give to fire fighters or a day care or even a shelter. Just to let people enjoy some treats.

Either way I feel like there’s some sweet act of charity going to happen eee

Right you are, anon ;)

Warnings: Simon is a lil pent up (suggestive thoughts, none in detail) and only briefly thinks about murder LMAO.

As you drive, all Simon can think about is how he should have known. Of course such a sweet, thoughtful thing like you would have a weekly volunteering schedule at the local nursing home. He shouldn’t be surprised that you know each of the staff by name, or what specific allergies and intolerances the residents have, but still his heart pounds in his chest, honeyed eyes transfixed on the angel leading him past the lobby. He feels out of place with his broad shoulders slumped, arms full with the trays of his own baked goods. 

     As you turn the corner, you slow your pace to walk level with Simon, a cheeky grin pulling at your lips. 

     “Technically, none of them are supposed to have desserts with added sugar because of health regulations or whatever, but I sweet-talked Ryan—the director—and got us a pass. He’s always had a thing for me, I think. And anyway, I believe that if you make it past 80 years old, you deserve to eat whatever the hell you want.”

     “Agreed,” Simon huffs quietly, trying to shake the urge to go back and rip Ryan’s head off. 

     His military days are over, he reminds himself, no more violent impulses should be acted on. Besides, there’s no reason to feel this way about a stupid little crush some guy has on you. You’re not his, although he’d rather not consider that you might have a thing for Ryan, as well. 

     “We’ll stop here, first,” you nudge his arm lightly, smiling up at him sweetly. “They’re… um, well, the group without dementia. They’ll be a little kinder.” 

     Bloody fucking hell. He’s blushing like a damn schoolboy, completely oblivious to everything you said after your arm brushed against his. All he knows is that he wants to keep you close, feel your hands on his stomach again, brush his fingers up and down your arms until you beg him to take that pretty little blouse of yours off- fuck. Snap out of it, Riley, you’re in a nursing home, for fuck’s sake. It isn’t until you grab a cupcake off of one of his trays that he realizes he’s followed you into a different room.

     He watches intently as you pull up a chair across from one elderly lady, gently patting her hand in greeting. She grins at you—a true, beaming smile, and it makes Simon smile. Maybe he’s not so far off; maybe you are a little slice of heaven on Earth. Maybe it’s not such a bad thing that other people get to see that. 

     “I didnae kno’ ye ‘ave a husband,” the woman says with furrowed brows, frosting smeared across her mouth.

     You giggle and help her wipe it away with a napkin before gently correcting her.

     “He’s not my husband, Ms. Orla. Simon’s a good friend,” you explain, turning back to look at him with a fond glance. 

     You miss the way his smile falters at your words. He misses the glumness in your tone at the implication. Ms. Orla is not so easily fooled.

     “Mhm. Said the same abou’ me late husband when we first met. He pu’ a ring on me finger within t’ree months,” she purses her lips and tilts her head with a bit of attitude before taking another bite of her cupcake. “And if he bakes like tha’, ah can only imagine wha’ he’s like in the-”

     “Okay!” You interrupt with wide eyes and a flustered smile, scrambling to stand from your seat. 

     But you trip over the chair leg and stumble backwards, right into Simon. He catches you with no hesitation, not even dropping so much as one macaron on the floor. You stare up at him, shocked and clinging onto his biceps for dear life. You’ve always hated those God-awful romance movies, the cheesy Hallmark kind of feel-good films that make you want to claw your eyes out—but the feeling of his arm around your waist makes your heart clench in your chest, and although the thought makes disgust bubble in your gut, in this moment, it’s just you and the big, handsome brute who just stopped you from busting your ass on the carpeted floor. 

     That is, until a chuckle erupts from Ms. Orla’s throat, and Simon lifts you back onto your feet, clearing the dreamlike haze that surrounded the both of you seconds before.

     “Be sure tae bring me a slice o’yer weddin’ cake in a few months, aye?”

[stevieschrodinger]

Part One Thirty

Couple of things - I've been going through it lately and just wanted to get this bit out. I do have more planned but I need a break after this. The Carpenters song referenced is 'all you get from love is a love song' and if you don't know it you can give it a listen and then you'll get the 'broken arm' joke.

They squish together into the phone booth, Steve hitting the numbers almost on reflex now, going through the motions of briefly speaking to Robin’s mom.

He angles the receiver so that Eddie can hear too, their cheeks practically touching, “Steve! Chrissy’s here-”

“Why?” Eddie cuts her off immediately, “not time to close the shop,” he almost sounds a little critical when he says it, making Steve smile.

“I know I know,” Chrissy says, “but he came back!”

“So we waited for him to leave, and we followed him,” Robin adds enthusiastically.

If Steve couldn’t hear for himself that they’re both at Robin’s place, and they’re both absolutely fine, he’d be panicking now, maybe he kind of is, because he’s sort of snippy when he says, “Robin what the fuck, it’s not safe, you two aren’t- you’re not Cagney and Lacy for fucks sake.”

“Steve it’s fine,” Chrissy tells him, “he went to Starcourt, so we went home and called Hopper right away.”

“Good,” Steve breathes a sigh of relief, “okay, so what now?”

“We don’t know,” Robin admits, “we’re just waiting to hear now. See what happens?”

“Okay we could...Eddie, you want to kill some time in town, and we can call again later?”

“Yeah” Eddie pulls back his sleeve to check his princess watch, “...lunch. And shopping?”

“Sure thing baby.”

Chrissy squeaks down the phone, “oh you’re both just too cute together.”

“Oh my god don’t encourage them.”

“Oh!” Chissy starts, “I met El and all the rest of the kids, isn’t she just, so cool? She made some pens float around!”

“El is the fewest bad kid. She’s quiet,” Eddie agrees, but Steve is absolutely certain Eddie’s warmed to the kids a lot over the last couple of months, so he knows Eddie doesn’t really mean it like that.

“Least,” Steve corrects softly, “she’s the least bad. Probably.”

“Best of a bad bunch?” Robin hazards.

“Maybe,” Eddie tells her, “we can come home soon?”

“Errrr…I mean, see what Hopper says, I guess? We might know later, but you guys shouldn’t come back today anyway, it’s a few hours drive, and you’ll need to pack up and everything, right?”

Steve frowns, as Eddie, very briefly, looks sad, “maybe tomorrow,” he says to Eddie more than the girls, “is that okay?”

“Yeah,” Eddie nods, “I...like the flower shop?”

“You miss it?”

“Yes, and Chrissy. Miss them. I know they’re not gone but...they’re not here.”

“Oh Eddie honey, I miss you too, okay? And when you get back you can come into work, there’s stuff to catch up on,” she whispers then, “Robin isn’t good with the flowers like you.”

“Hey! I’m trying my best here-” but she gives up, everyone else laughing over her.

The payphone starts to beep, “we’ll call later okay!”

Steve’s pretty sure Eddie’s jar will be empty again after today. He’s bought four more records, more Led Zeppelin, plus a Dio record because ‘Rainbow in the Dark’ was playing when they walked in and Eddie really liked it. Steve absolutely certain that the girl with a green Mohawk wearing a Dio shirt sealed the deal, but he's not going to tease Eddie about it.

Eddie comes out of the changing room of the second hand clothes store, showing Steve the jeans he’s trying on. He’s been making do all this time with Steve’s draw string sweats and jeans with a very cinched in belt, so it’s definitely time for Eddie to choose his own things but...Steve wasn’t expecting Eddie to choose anything quite so tight.

“Stevie? What do you think?”

Steve swallows thickly before he answers, he swears Eddie’s only getting away with wearing them because his dicks on the inside, the thing would get strangled otherwise, “you look really good Eds. You like those ones?”

“Yes. Black, like my tail. And look,” Eddie scratches at the ripped fabric, his knees on display, “see my knees. I like to see them, they’re new.”

Steve bites his lips briefly to suppress the chuckle, “you should definitely be proud of those knees, you did grow them yourself.”

Steve frowns at the sight of Eddie in a leather jacket; it’s so very far removed from everything he’s been wearing. It’s so different from all of Steve’s clothes, but Steve can’t deny he’s making it work. It definitely suits the look Eddie’s starting to cultivate. He’s very much leaning towards darker colors, and he was really pleased when he turned up a Led Zeppelin tee shirt out of a pile.

The difference between the Eddie that comes out of the dressing room and the Eddie that went in is startling, Steve’s pullovers and polos all tend to be lighter colors, so all the black is very different.

“You like it?”

“I mean, as long as you like it, sure, you’re the one who has to wear it. But yeah, yeah I do like it. You look good.”

Steve has to stand by while Eddie rummages across a tray of cheap jewellery, “they’ll turn your fingers green,” he warns vaguely. Eddie shrugs, probably not understanding what Steve means as he tries things on, he likes the shiny silver ones that definitely are not silver, “you’re such a magpie.”

Eddie chooses two chunky rings that are so cheap he will get change from his last five dollars, but he clearly likes how they look on his fingers; he doesn’t even take them off to pay for them. Steve knows he’s just here to hold the bags, but he doesn’t mind. Eddie’s worked hard for this money, he should spend it on the things he wants.

Steve meanders through the store, it’s mostly second hand furniture and ‘antiques’, but Steve figures that term is being used very, very loosely. As near as Steve can tell it mostly looks like house clearances and that sort of thing. He spends a little while at the glass cabinets, staring at all the little figurines. 'Dust gatherers,' his dad calls them. There’s some tiny little jade ones, big tall porcelain ones and everything in between.

He’s distracted away from them by the sound of twanging. Bad, uneven twanging on an acoustic guitar. Steve follows the sound, finding Eddie just fiddling with the strings, the guitar still lying on it’s back. It doesn’t have a case, and looks pretty beat to hell to Steve, covered in stickers and all scratched up, but Eddie is entertained by the noises, and he looks up, smiling, “you going to buy it?”

Eddie shakes his head, “not enough left.”

“How much are you short?”

Eddie checks his pocket, and then the little label hanging from the neck, “six dollars?” he hazards.

“Okay, well, I’ve got four left on me, so maybe you can haggle the guy down.”

“I’ll try,” Eddie grins big, taking the change from Steve.

They’ve dropped everything off at the car and, with nothing left to do to kill any more time, they head back to the phone and smush into the booth together.

“He wasn’t there when Hopper got there,” Robin tells them, and Steve sighs, disappointed, “but! El looked into my head real quick, and she says he’s called Doctor Owens. She knew who he was, and she says he’s...nice.”

“Nice,” Steve repeats, deadpan, “a man who facilitated experiments on little kids. Nice.”

“Well...I mean maybe as nice as he could be given the circumstances. I got the impression he never...he wasn’t cruel about it. If you know what I mean.”

“I guess,” Steve hazards, “Eddie?”

Next to him, Eddie’s kind of staring into space, frowning, “Owens. Yes. Remember that word, maybe?”

“Okay. Okay, so what are they doing now Robs?”

“Well, Hoppers keeping an eye out and he’s going to try the Motel right now, but if he’s not there he’s going to start doing drive bys of Starcourt and stuff, and hopefully he turns up,” Steve can hear in her voice that she's shrugging, “but Hopper says since no one else is asking any questions, he’s hopeful that it’s just this guy working alone, you know?”

“Yeah, yeah okay.”

Eddie listens to his new record while Steve makes dinner. He has his guitar over his lap, and occasionally plays a note or two. He understood the mechanics of it already, but Steve figures he must have seen someone with a guitar on TV at some point.

Steve’s absorbed in what he’s doing, and doesn’t notice at first that the twanging noises have stopped. The record ends, but it feels like it’s been a long time of quiet, and Steve looks over to find Eddie, expecting him to be flipping it.

He isn’t.

Steve turns off the stove, covering the two pots he’s been carefully nursing. Eddie isn’t in the cabin; Steve finds him on the dock. He’s just...standing there, in the near dark. Just...staring out across the lake.

“Eddie? You okay?”

Eddie looks around again, “heard something. Had to check it’s safe.”

“You could have said,” Steve comes up close, wrapping a hand around Eddie’s hip. Eddie turns in reflexively, looking for a quick, soft kiss, which Steve is happy to give.

“Think the trees look like The Upside Down.”

“Do you?” Steve looks around; all the trees have leaves on, they’re dense and alive and nothing like the dead twisted things that litter The Upside Down, “I don’t think they do.”

Wind moves through the trees, the susurration of leaves is kind of loud, “sounds like bats. Many many bats,” Eddie shifts closer, pressing himself against Steve.

“You okay?”

“I don’t...I think I don’t like it here.”

“Oh...well,” Steve makes a decision, “since they’re pretty sure it’s just the Owens guy, how about we go home tomorrow? I mean, you might not be able to go to work and stuff until they find him-”

“Yes. Home tomorrow.”

Steve looks around again, tries to see it through Eddie’s eyes. Tries to see what reminds him so much of The Upside Down. Maybe the panic attack in the shower knocked some stuff loose; Steve doesn’t know. Eddie’s been making do with strip washing from the bathroom sink the last couple of nights, and that’s been fine but not ideal. Eddie’s hair needs a wash.

“Okay, we’ll call when we go through town, okay, let them know?”

“Yes...take my book back.”

“You finished it?”

“Almost.”

“Lets go inside, I can finish dinner and you can tell me what it’s about?”

“So they’re...stealing treasure from a dragon?” Eddie nods, his mouth full of dinner. “Okay, fair enough.”

Eddie swallows, “I want to read The Lord of The Rings.”

“Okay, I’m sure we can get it at the library.”

“You promise dragons aren’t real?”

“Yup. Definitely not real, and there’s no hobbits or wizards or- or elves or any of that stuff. And magic isn’t real- well. That kind of magic isn’t real, at least,” Eddie frowns like the book committed a crime.

“But...dinosaurs. Dinosaurs were definitely real, you have those in your book?”

“Yes...dragons can fly though. And breathe fire.”

“Well...some dinosaurs could fly, and they were big like a dragon, some of them.”

“Really?” Eddie’s eyes go wide, “I thought from my book like...cow sized?”

“Hu uh,” Eddie excitement is actually palpable, “definitely a dinosaur book next, some of them were like...as tall as trees,” Steve doesn’t actually know, he was most definitely not a dinosaur kid, but he’s pretty sure at least some of them were tall like that.

“All the time, used to do this. When I had a tail,” Eddie’s voice is muffled where he’s bent over the kitchen sink.

“Yeah...I guess I did,” and it’s true, Steve was washing Eddie’s hair pretty much every other day when Eddie still had a tail. He feels the back of Eddie’s head almost reflexively at the memory, following the ghostly, barely there ridges with his fingers through the suds, “it’s getting so long again already.”

“Good. El said Max makes nice braids when it’s long enough.”

Steve snorts a laugh, “oh yeah? That’s going to look great, now eyes and mouth closed, I’m gonna’ rinse.”

Eddie has his head resting on Steve’s tummy while Steve plays with his hair, hand buried in his curls, massaging his scalp, “what you doing baby?”

“Hear.”

“Hear? Oh what, you’re listening?”

“Listening to Stevie’s inside.”

“Anything interesting?”

Eddie nods, his cheek dragging against Steve’s skin, “funny tummy noises. And bumping.”

“Bumping? Oh, beating, my heart right?”

“Yeah. Stevie, we can definitely go home tomorrow?”

“Sure thing babe, we can get packed up in the morning,” Steve yawns, “you want to go to sleep?”

“Maybe. There’s bad dreams here.”

Steve blinks his eyes open to look down, a weird shiver raising goosebumps on his arms, all the way down to where his hand is still buried in Eddie’s hair. Eddie didn’t have to put that quite so creepily. “I think it’s just...maybe it reminds you of things here, so your mind is kind playing tricks on you a little? There’s nothing bad here baby, I promise. What do you think?”

“The water reminds me of Barb.”

Steve frowns, “Barb? How do you know about Barb?” Under Steve’s hand, something crawls unpleasantly beneath Eddie’s skin.

Eddie shrugs, “Nancy told me you killed her.”

“Stevie!” Steve fights, briefly, confused. “Stevie love, it’s okay. Bad dream.”

Steve’s kind of sweaty and panting, but he quickly realizes that it’s Eddie whose holding him, so he quits moving, “Jesus Christ,” he breathes out slowly, trying to calm himself down, “I’m fine. Thanks. I’ll be okay in a minute.”

“You want to tell me? Here, water.” Steve takes the glass, sipping it carefully. He can feel the cool water go down, grounding him.

Steve has no desire whatsoever to talk about it, so he deflects, “what time is it?”

“Five?” Eddie leans over, checking his watch before putting it back, “half five.”

“I miss you saying five and a half, it was cute.”

“I can say five and a half,” Eddie takes the glass again before snuggling in.

“Did I wake you?”

“No. Already awake...bad dreams.”

“Fucking hell. We need to go home just so we can get a good nights sleep. What did you dream about?”

“You. Lost you, in the trees...we were here but...Upside Down trees? I tried and tried to find you. Could hear you, ‘help help,’ really scared.”

“Maybe it is this place,” Steve settles down again, pulling Eddie close, “weird that we’re both having bad dreams right?”

“I don’t like it.”

“No but...lets just rest a little, and then breakfast and we can get packed up, okay?”

“Okay, Stevie love.”

Eddie waits outside the phone booth, leaning against the car where it sits parked by the curb. Steve calls Family Video today, knowing that Robs should be at work, “hey Bird-”

“He got him! Hopper! He got the Owens guy!”

Steve feels himself relax, one less thing to worry about, “good. Good, we’re coming home.”

“Okay, Hopper does think it was just this guy. He was staying at the Motel, Hop had to wait around a bit, like proper stake out!! But he did get him. Said he couldn’t find any evidence of him like, working with other people, and El’s going to talk to him or something. Make sure. I’m not sure about that bit but-”

“Okay, okay, so where is he?”

“Hopper’s got him at the Motel. Probably like, tied up, do you think? Steve what if he’s like, working for the government though. Or or the Russians-”

Steve rubs his forehead, “Birdie, I know you do love some empty speculation-”

“I do!”

“But how about we wait until we actually like, know?”

“Spoil sport.”

They say goodbye and end the call, Steve offering the keys to Eddie, “want to do a little of the driving?”

Eddie grins big, clearly surprised and pleased by the offer, “yes I do!”

“Okay, careful though, you don’t know the roads like at home. And no getting distracted by the cows.”

Eddie ‘moos’ really loudly in response, once in the drivers seat, he pauses for a second, “should have bought tapes,” he laments.

“Well, unlucky, I’m thinking some Carpenters.”

“Nooooo,” Eddie laughs.

“Shut up, I know you love it. Now sing to me about how the best love songs are written with a broken arm.”

“I think that’s what she said! Broken heart makes no sense,” Eddie grumbles, Steve still laughing.

Eddie had caved after two hours of driving, but still, considering all Eddie had done before today is short journeys around Hawkins, Steve figures he did really well in an unfamiliar place, and he told Eddie so. Eddie has turned into a surprisingly careful driver, Steve doesn’t know if it’s his consideration for Steve’s beloved car, or if it’s Steve’s constant reminders that Eddie cannot afford to draw any attention to himself. Either way, Steve feels safe in the passenger seat.

“Okay, I think I should take you home to unpack, then I can figure out how to call Hop and see if I can go over.”

Steve’s not even surprised by Eddie’s response, “both go, you mean.”

“Eddie...I’m not sure it’s-”

“Stevie,” Eddie manages to make it a complete sentence.

“Look...I’m not going to take your choice away, okay, if you want to come, then that’s fine. But...you get I just want you to be safe, right? And I feel like the less this guy knows, the better?”

“I know...I know,” Eddie has his thinking face on, when he’s wrestling with how to say something. It’s been happening a lot less lately, but this concept must be more complicated. “The people had me in a tank. They...hurt me. I was scared. Now...Owens is in the tank? He has to...he has to say why. To me. And sorry.”

“I...is that what you want? For him to apologize? To...explain?”

“Apologize and explain. Yes. And...I will not hurt him. I’m Eddie. I’m not people.”

Steve shouldn’t be surprised, not really. He feels like he knows Eddie inside and out, but his natural compassion, his...kind of innate goodness still blind sides Steve sometimes. Steve had vaguely considered that a realistic outcome of this may be that he’s helping Hopper hide a body. Maybe. It was kind of an abstract thought he hadn’t wanted to poke too hard but, realistically, they’re talking about a man who experimented on children, on Eddie.

Steve is clearly no where near as forgiving.

Hopper meets them both outside the room. Steve has no idea what to expect, really. The rasp of Hopper stubble is loud when he scrubs at his face, “El thinks this Owens guy is legit. He already knows Eddie has,” Hopper gestures vaguely, “human parts.”

“How?”

“After Starcourt happened, he went back to poke about, and he saw you both. More importantly Eddie, driving a car,” Hopper’s words are full of accusation, like ‘see I knew him driving would be trouble.’

Eddie waves a hand dismissively, “I can go in?”

Hopper sighs, but Steve isn’t going to fight Eddie on this. He knows what he wants, and he’s so fucking smart. Steve’s sure Eddie doesn’t fully appreciate the risks, not since he doesn’t get fully grasp how stuff like actual governments work but...yeah. It’s Eddie’s life, but Steve still takes his hand. If they’re doing it, they’re doing it together.

Hopper just sighs and rolls his eyes.

Steve figured that, somehow, this guy would just...look evil. He doesn’t. He looks like a harmless old dude, sitting on the edge of a sagging motel mattress, looking over some papers. He cannot disguise his interest when Eddie walks in.

He’s not restrained or anything, he’s just...there. There are books and pens and folders and shit spread out on the opposite bed, like he’s been working.

“Owens?” Eddie checks.

“Yes. Yes hello it is...so wonderful to see you again. And to hear you speak! How good is your understanding-”

“I think we have questions, first,” Steve cuts him off sharply. He doesn’t seem threatening, just...genuinely pleased to see Eddie. The guy has to be up to something, Steve can’t shake the suspicious thought that the guy must be one hell of an actor.

“Yes. Of course. I have everything, all of my notes, from Starcourt, so any questions you have I will do my best to answer.”

“Okay, where the fuck do you get off experimenting on people?” Steve’s pretty sure his voice is reasonably calm. He’s vaguely aware of Hopper coming in behind them, pulling up a folding chair he must have gotten from his truck.

Owens closes his eyes briefly, before addressing Eddie,“yes. Of course. I am so so sorry for what you were put through but..the work we were doing. I was not fully aware of just how intelligent you were. Are. I didn’t at first fully comprehend that we were even dealing with a sentient specimen-”

“He’s not a specimen, he’s a person,” Steve snaps.

“I am very smart,” Eddie adds helpfully.

“Yes. Yes you are. And the transformation you have undergone is nothing short of miraculous, if I could take some bloods-”

“Absolutely the fuck not. What were you doing with the Russians?”

“Oh,” Owens seems genuinely confused by the question, like it hadn’t really occurred to him, “when the original labs were closed, the funding ended. Of course we were aware of the mirror dimension-”

Eddie looks at Steve, “he means The Upside Down.”

“-Oh, is that what you call it? Well, it was deemed for too dangerous, and not worth the expense, to continue, not after such a catastrophic failure. The Russians however didn’t seem to have any such issues and were interested in opening a gate; I had to go where I could to continue my work, you understand. And then they brought you back with them. What should I call you?”

“Eddie. I’m Eddie.”

“And you’re working? And you’ve learned to speak and drive a car...your ability to process new information is staggering. The physical changes, did they just happen? What was the-”

“Stop, just stop. What do you want with him? Why have you been asking around?”

“Stevie,” Eddie says quietly, pulling Steve back a little by his shirt. And yeah, okay, Steve may have taken a step forward.

“I just...want to continue my studies. Eddie’s change...the differences in his make up, his body’s ability to rewrite itself – it could lead to...well, significant discoveries. The data I could gather, imagine the effect on modern medicine, what we might achieve – the potential to help people could be immeasurable.”

“We could...help people?” Eddie echoes.

“Yes, well. We could try. Like I said I would have to do some tests to understand-”

“No,” Steve crosses his arms over his chest.

Next to him, Eddie asks quietly, “what tests?”

“Just...take some blood, for now. Just try to understand how this happened and...what the changes mean on a genetic level.”

“Look, Eddie, you do not have to do a single thing for this guy, okay? This could be dangerous, they could come and take you away again-”

“I would most certainly like to avoid just that,” Owens interjects.

“Oh yeah, right. Sell me on that then,” Steve snaps at him.

“Look,” Owens spreads his hands, he hasn’t moved from his seat on the bed, “I’m the only one who knows about this. The little contact I’ve had with my previous...employers implies that they’re done with the site, they’ve scrubbed the remains of Starcourt, it’s already being filled in. I only know you even exist because I just happened to see you. No one knows Eddie is alive right now, that he didn’t die in his tank, except for me. If I tell anyone they will take him, potentially back to Russia, and I’ll loose access to him. If I inform the American team, I’ll have to admit that I was working for the Russians, which would cause some obvious fall out for me. This way I can just…continue with my work.”

Steve rubs his eyes. It sounds...legit. He guesses. Logical. “Hopper?”

“El says he’s on the level.”

“Jesus fuck,” Steve huffs, walking in a circle.

“Stevie? I want to help people.”

“I know you do baby.”

“Oh, are you two in a relationship-”

Steve finds himself leaning over to point in Owens face, “do not.”

“Okay, okay,” Owens spreads his hands, “look, I think you need to see this from the other side too. What if Eddie gets sick? What are you going to do, take him to the doctor? And what about El, and her powers? What if something comes up with her? I’m more than happy to-”

“I’m sure you are,” Steve stops him, “and you agree with that Hop?”

“I mean, he’s got a point. Don’t think we could take Eddie to a regular doctor, and El was fine with letting him look her over. I mean I maybe don’t agree with the shit he’s been involved in but...I don’t currently have a lot of choice with getting my kids brain powers looked at.”

“I don’t like it.”

Hopper shrugs, “nope.”

“This is such a bad plan.”

“Not as bad as-”

“Don’t you dare-” Steve starts.

“Letting some fish guy-”

“Hopper!” Eddie adds, affronted.

“Bite your toes off.”

Part ThirtyTwo

[mysteryshoptls]

SR Deuce Spade - Night Sky Chiffon Vignette

I heard him challenge me and I just…

[Library – Entrance Hall]

Riddle: The Princess in the Tower used a frying pan on a thief built like a brick in the closet…

[staaaaare]

Jack: ME!?

Kalim: I mean, you're the tallest out of all of us, right?

Deuce: There aren't any closets in the library… So I guess we'll need to use a supply room instead.

Jack: Hey, don't just ignore me! How were you planning on using "this" to lock me in, anyway?

Deuce: That's where I'm stuck. Housewarden, none of the books said how it was done, right?

Riddle: Correct. There's nothing written other than "The thief was locked up using the frying pan."

Deuce: So we gotta come up with something on our own, huh. Hmmm… I can't really think of what to use it for other than frying eggs.

Jack: I think "frying eggs" is a bit too specific. But I do agree, I can't think of anything else but using it to cook.

Kalim: Saaame. I can't think of anything.

Riddle: Perhaps when she came across the thief, she just happened to have a frying pan in her hands.

Deuce: I see. I guess if you're holding a frying pan, it could be used to intimidate a thief somewhat.

Deuce: Plus, maybe if I raised it up high like this…

Jack: Hmph, what, you think that's threatening?

Jack: It's said he was a thief, so he's probably had to deal with guards, or needed to run for long periods.

Jack: But the princess had been locked up in the tower forever, and never squared off against another person before.

Jack: Can't imagine the thief would ever lose to the princess unless he was somehow tied down or something.

Deuce: Who knows? The princess was always doing a ton of climbing, which woulda build up muscle.

Jack: What, you wanna go?

Deuce: Yeah, let's go!

Kalim: Ahahaha, suddenly Deuce's the Princess in the Tower and Jack's become the thief!

Riddle: You two are getting too heated. Leave your little tiff for later.

Deuce: Ah, sorry! I heard him challenge me and I just…

Deuce: …Oh!

Deuce: What if the princess didn't fight him or use force to stop him, but challenged him to something to make him listen to her?

Kalim: What's that supposed to mean?

Deuce: Jack just said, "Can't imagine the thief would ever lose to the princess," right?

Deuce: What if the thief also thought the same thing? I bet he wouldn't turn down a challenge from the princess, then.

Riddle: I see, so she used his carelessness to her advantage.

Jack: If what Deuce says is true and he lost to her in some way, I can understand the thief listening to her, sure…

Jack: But that still doesn't explain how the frying pan was used.

Kalim: Mmm… Oh hey, maybe it was used for tennis? A frying pan and a racket are pretty much the same thing.

Riddle: There's no ball, now is there? And it would be a massive issue if a ball or racket were to hit the books!

Riddle: Although, it may not be too bad of an idea to consider some sort of game that would utilize something similar to a frying pan.

Deuce: Something similar to a frying pan, huh. It'd have to have a rounded end and a thin handle…

Deuce: …A spoon?

Deuce: Oh yeah, if it's that one game that uses a spoon, then...!!

Kalim: Hm? You come up with something, Deuce?

Deuce: Yes! The "Egg Race"!

Jack: Egg Race? What's that?

Riddle: It's a common game that's played on sports days back in the Queendom of Roses.

Deuce: You balance a whole egg on a spoon and run towards the goal. The fastest one is the winner.

Deuce: I think the rules are different depending on where it's played, like some places'll disqualify you if you drop the egg, and others just make you start all over.

Jack: So, in other words, you're saying we should try playing this Egg Race thing with a frying pan instead of a spoon?

Deuce: Yeah. Wouldn't that make it a challenge that can be done with a frying pan?

Kalim: I like the idea! Oh, but… We don't have eggs. Should we ask someone to bring some?

Riddle: I find it hard to believe that an egg would fall easily from the surface of a frying pan, in the first place.

Deuce: It'll work. I've thought about that too!

Deuce: We still have a ton of sugar cubes left over that was brought in with the tea set.

Deuce: We'll stack them up high in the center of the frying pan, and whoever makes it to the goal without letting them topple over wins.

Deuce: How's that sound?

Riddle: It's not that difficult to stack cubes of sugar, though…

Kalim: Ack, they all fell over when I picked up the frying pan. It's gonna be hard to run while keeping it balanced.

Riddle: But it may be easy to implement in the library… Let us try Deuce's idea.

Deuce: Alright. So, Jack!

Deuce: IT'S TIME TO DUEL, YOU AND ME, WITH THIS SUGAR CUBE RACE!

Jack: What!?

[Library – Entrance Hall]

Deuce: Alright. So, Jack!

Deuce: IT'S TIME TO DUEL, YOU AND ME, WITH THIS SUGAR CUBE RACE!

Jack: What!?

Riddle: Ah, yes, if we are to consider this a competition between the prince and the thief, then a head-to-head duel is appropriate.

Kalim: Ahahah! Jack and Deuce, one-on one, huh! This is gonna be good～!

Deuce: If I win against you, I'm gonna have you go into that supply room over there.

Jack: You really want that duel with me, huh… What are you trying to pull here?

Deuce: Nothing? Oh, I get it. You're scared.

Deuce: I mean, if you think you can't beat me, we can think of a different idea…

Jack: Huh? Who's scared?

Jack: I didn't say I wasn't gonna do it. I'll take you on!

Deuce: The goal is the bookshelf on the far wall. The one who can make it there without letting the sugar cubes fall over wins.

Jack: Yeah, yeah, I know the rules. Let's start already.

Kalim: Okay, get yourselves lined up. Ready… SET, GO!

Jack/Deuce: LET'S GOOOO!!!!!

[dash!!]

Jack: Woah, the sugar cubes almost fell over already.

Jack: Tch… I want to pick up more speed, but running without letting it fall is taking all my focus.

Riddle: His sugar cubes almost toppled over right at his starting dash, but it looks like he recovered somehow.

Riddle: It seems like Jack has changed it up and opted to take larger strides.

Riddle: There's not a single wasted movement in his steps, he's very consistent. I'm sure his core is very well built.

Kalim: Jack's just zooming along! But Deuce hasn't moved at all from the start line.

Kalim: He's been adjusting how he holds the frying pan for a while now… Is he having trouble keeping the sugar cubes standing?

Riddle: No… Take a look. DEUCE IS OFF AND RUNNING!

Kalim: He's so fast!! But if he hurries too much, the sugar cubes'll fall over.

Kalim: …Huh, they're not moving at all. Deuce is almost caught up to Jack. This is turning out to be an awesome match!

Riddle: This is no time to be enjoying the race with your commentary. It will all come down to whether this can be considered passable for this specific anecdote.

Kalim: Oh, right. But we can still cheer for them, right? KEEP IT UP, YOU TWO!!!

Riddle: How carefree… Oh.

Riddle: Deuce has almost caught up to Jack, even though he had a delayed start…!

Jack: Urk, when did you...!

Deuce: You sure you can afford to look away? I'll be taking the lead now!!

Jack: Wait! Dammit, his running is so smooth…!

[dash!!]

Kalim: Deuce has passed Jack… and widened the lead!!

Riddle: THE RACE IS OVER! THE WINNER IS DEUCE SPADE!!

Deuce: YEAH!

Kalim: Deuce, you did amazing catching up. I totally thought Jack was gonna win.

Riddle: Indeed. I hadn't expected you to be able to run at such speeds while keeping yourself steady as you did.

Jack: …So it's not like you were trying to pull some trick on me, but you were challenging me in something you knew you could win in.

Jack: Tch… It's your win, Deuce.

Kalim: Huh, what's that mean?

Deuce: I knew I'd be able to win in the sugar cube race, is all.

Deuce: I've had tons of experience riding blastcycles up bumpy gravel roads and steep slopes.

Deuce: I'm pretty confident in my ability to keep my balance.

Riddle: So, back at the starting line, were you adjusting your grip on the frying pan, trying to figure out the best way to hold it steady?

Deuce: Pretty much, yes.

Jack: Looks like I got provoked into it.

Jack: I hate to say it, but a loss is a loss. I'll let myself get shoved into the supply room.

Jack: I'm ready to go. Do it now, Deuce!

Deuce: RIGHT, HERE WE GO, JACK!!

[SLAM!!!]

[Exterior Hallway 2F]

Riddle: We're finally back on the campus proper. We can still see the lanterns so clearly from here.

Kalim: It's so pretty～ I'm glad I get to enjoy this view with you guys.

Kalim: And hey, that sugar cube race thing that Deuce came up with sure was fun. We should all do it someday!

Deuce: I'm up for it. Though, I might just sweep all of you.

Jack: Yeah, right. I'll be the one to win it next time.

Riddle: I've grasped the concept after watching Deuce. If I participate, I won't stand to lose, either.

Deuce: You too, Housewarden…!? But, fine. Doesn't matter who I go up against, I'll never lose!

Requested by @farfalla049 and @skibidibabygirl.