#anyway yeah that. ive been thinking abt this for a few months and I would like to attempt to do smth like that

[spearxwind]

Hi hello I have two questions for yall

does anyone here know decent book editing software that isnt indesign because i cant afford indesign and its a little incomprehensible (pretty much I'm looking how I can edit a book with spread pages and images) nothing insanely fancy, I am just looking to turn one of my big lore google docs into something nice and art-book looking I wanna be able to do something like this, for example

what I am looking to do is basically turn my challenger deep lore doc into an actual lore book so I will hopefully do some illustrations for it down the line for each section of it. so the next question is then:

would any of you be interested in purchasing that? it would be digital (unless there's an insane amount of interest for physical editions, in which case I will consider it)

[phagodyke]

was brave and talked to my doctor abt my period bs + she said it might be endometriosis without me even having to bring it up... 💀

[zundamind]

wow, would you look at that! it's been a full ass year since you fucked me over! september 29th.... yeahh..... XD our fuck-you-versary! hi clifford!

in case you dont remember, the name piko might jog your mind. yeah thats me!! hellwo!! honestly you shouldve known better than to stick with your old username but hey props on you for changing it last minute! almost didnt find you for a second lolll!!

i wanted to drop in and say HEY! HELLO! HI! and give you some status updates :3

update one: i'm getting better!! no thanks to you, of course. and actually i should say we're getting better. yep! thats what happens when you suffer so bad your brain cant take suffering solo! XD

update two: while my mental health has been at an all time low ever since you fucking dropped me like a fucking ROCK, ive been getting over things lately! my clean streaks are now longer than a week! i no longer want to kms! im even making friends again!

update three: while both of the above statements are true, you still live in my mind rent free. i remember when i first stumbled across your blog a few months ago, i had a full on spiral! not anymore, though. i am STEEL, BABY! also you spinning in the mental microwave rent free is why i'm sending you this heartfelt ask!

man.... even when i try, i still find you somehow and its never intentional. like imagine scrolling the tptm tag only to be straight up jumpscared by your ex best friend's username! how embarrassing!

also i'm sorry but i have to say the reason(s) you left are sooo fucking stupid..... what, cus i was weird? come on. everyones a little weird. even a little deviantart weird. oh and because of some stupid opinions that shouldntve even mattered if you were actually a friend? get real, trey. what if i left your ass because you had a fuckin biting kink? that wouldve been funny actually. like making a sad callout post on twitter thats just "my friend left me because i wasnt vanilla enough!" XDDD

oh, and if you ever see your "stalker" again, assuming you're not thinking its me and that its actually your previous qpr or whatever the fuck, say hi! i find it funny as FUCK, since, you know, you were considering cyberstalking me at one point. and tell chaos i said hi too. i'd also mention mayu, but do you two even keep in touch anymore? probably not, considering the weird things she's done.

anyways thats the end of my relay. if you dont want these kinds of asks again, i suggest either turning asks off or just straight up deleting your tumblr and/or making another one that is NOT connected to any username youve used in the past, because in that case i'll just find your ass again lmaooo. remember! every year on this day will be the day i remind you that you are NOT allowed to stay sane X3

sincerely, your most hated, piko. (i hardly use my old blog anymore, so have fun finding my current blog! and do what you want with this ask, make a callout post, scream into the ethers, reply to it, idc.)

this should stay private but idc

i know what i did was wrong piko! i was 12-13.

dont take this as me excusing myself. i had horrible emotional regulation back then, ive healed from everything back there. you dont deserve to be called out because ur like. 14-15.

do not bring mayu or chaos into this,weve all healed and forgot abt you.

i overreacted bc of very worthless things because i was basically obsessed witj you, you were my fp, if you didnt know.

completely forgot you even existed, i havent been checking your profiles at all in months. you shouldnt either, please forget about me. you'll drive yourself crazy.,

if you think im going to "cancel" you, no im not. for your sake, please dont interact with me anymore. i apologize for how i acted over stupid things, but we were both young and idiotic. im also a system, i dont even remember half of the things you did bc of that.

move on. ive moved on, weve all moved on.

dont bother yourself with me, you dont need to.

[ottiliere]

hello! ur posts on the vagus nerve and its connections to digestions have encouraged me to do a lil mini dissertation thingy kinda focused on it/around it, ur big thread on PVT and everything really piqued my interest when i read it and i just held onto it for like a year or smthing until like last week when i started the project. Ik u said recently in one of ur posts i believe that ur not going to post the big dirk PVT post and im not here to be like yo post it because i also think u said that ur kinda moving away from like hs/dirky stuff rn ?? (im forgetting if i saw that sorry) but yeah i just wanted to say thank u etc etc, like ive never done an ask before so sorry if this is phrased weirdly but ur blog is just like one of those blogs that fundamentally changed how i view certain things in life for the better lol, like whether its ur beautiful representations / depictions of mental health in like just beautifully painted art (seriously the way u make it look like idk how to word it cartoony/really 2d but then it stands out against the background + if u zoom in and see the tiny pixel details == it makes me mad) or just like the huggeee long form posts that i like to chew on and save cuz theres so many details that AFFAAT like the way you talk abt the topics u portray has made me concious of how i would want to do so in the same way ig u get me. anyway this got really long and idk if i come across coherently, but ur just a random person on the internet whos art and written thoughts that u decide to share makes me happy when i see it == makes me pace around my room and distract me from this fat essay lmao so tldr: i really appreciate what u do + i hope like that ur doing well and that u keep arting and thoughting no matter what it is that u choose to focus on

(uve made me comitted to reading jthm, playing psychonauts and giving jjba w/ dio another go lmao) 🫶🫶

Hello! I’m sorry this reply is coming so late, this ask in particular is very sweet and has stuck out to me.

I’m really happy to have introduced you to PVT, this is something I’ve heard from a few different people on here and it’s very sweet… I did my thesis on it in college and the time really flew by while working on it, things you don't think could possibly attributed to "nerve issues" being nerve issues is always an eye-opener, isn't it? being able to research things that interest you & access information in general really is a privilege in this day and age.

“The topics [I] portray” are very important to me, so it’s heartening when others take interest in spite of the obvious deterrents. A lot of what I love making art about is unpalatable to most, and while I do understand the reasons for that on principle, it can make things feel a little insular. I genuinely believe there’s a lot of value in depicting tableaus of misery.

The last year has brought a lot of very unforeseen changes, and my life is quite different from when I initially made this blog to post about him! That’s also part of why I’ve been so sparse here…though I’m working to change that quite soon. I love sharing my work, and I’ve had the privilege of meeting some truly wonderful people through this website. That said…with where I’m at now, I’m not sure I’ll be posting the Dirk essay anytime soon, I’m afraid.

I’ve undertaken a few ongoing projects, one of which in particular is an original project I plan on sharing publicly here hopefully within the next month or so. I hope it’s something you & anyone else who’s stuck around with me here will enjoy, but failing that, I’ve really enjoyed working on it thus far.

Thank you for the sweet ask, take care, and good luck with your project!

[yinyuedijun]

hiiiii i have not read or seen windbreaker my only interactions with it are bc some of my moots r into it now so ive read some fics and i saw tokyo vice on my dash and i was really pulled in by the summary so i read both parts and sincerity and the little prequel piece and oh my god it’s so good. i love the humor, the narrative voice is so witty. suo’s character is so intriguing bc as much as the reader loves and knows him there’s still so much going on that we can only guess at and i felt like that was communicated really well. i enjoyed the fact that sincerity and the prequel let us see their relationship at a different time and how we got to where they are in the present. im really interested in the reader and i felt like u did such a good job of weaving in the comedy to make some of her internal dialogue more lighthearted while still developing her emotional state really well. plus the smut was insane like 11/10 no notes. when the reader said she was excited for pussy inspections >>> like fuck yea me too!!! but anyways i loved the details we learn about her and how her fantasy is have really mundane romantic and vanilla sex. it really speaks to just how fucked up her life has been to the point where her biggest romantic dream is just to have regular sex with the man she loves. like ugh the angst interspersed with the comedy and smut was just chef's kiss. AND THAT ENDING??? WHEN HE THINKS SHE'S ASLEEP. like that did tug at my heartstrings especially when he talked about what their old friends think of him :(( and how if he was a better man he'd let her go. i read another organized crime x civilian fic for a different fandom a few years ago and it ended with the civilian person leaving his partner/his partner letting him go bc the deeper the partner he got into organized crime the more unhinged he became and how his mental state began affecting the civilian. thats a really condensed way of explaining but the events were crazy and it had me crying and screaming every chapter but that's something that ive never seen in other yakuza/gang/organized crime aus so i thought it was really cool to see how that is something that suo thinks about and has to come to terms with now that its been a few years and he can look back at his behavior.

but anyways i really really loved it and im gonna watch/read windbreaker as soon as i can now :)) so thank u for the wonderful fic 🙂‍↕️ and is tokyo vice over? i dont think i saw a completed tag on it on ur masterlist so i wanted to ask if u were leaving the world open

ANONNN I LOVE U SO MUCH TRULY THANK YOU!! 🥹 tokyo vice was an absurd self-indulgent project so I'm so very happy you gave it a shot despite not being into wbk!!! I must confess that it's wildly different from canon LOL but I do adore the canon series nevertheless, and I hope you enjoy it :-) (let us know if you do!!!)

I can't thank you enough for sending such juicy feedback abt tokyo vice, especially about the reader! I did find it somewhat stressful trying to balance the comedy of her narration with the horny and angsty and deranged events of the plot, so I'm glad that you liked that aspect of the fic !!! 🥹 and yeah despite all the comedy, she really is a traumatized meow meow. but it's okay, she can now have the normal sex of her dreams with the love of her life - as long as she can survive 4 months of orgasm denial before their wedding 😭

and LOL I love yandere charas with self-awareness so in general I love writing arcs where they love the reader enough to understand that they should let them go. the plot you're describing is sooooo up my alley and I think suo would absolutely have that thought process if the reader were even remotely mentally normal. unfortunately she is equally insane. I guess that is the tragedy of it for suo - he knows that he can never get better, and he also knows that as long as they are together, she can never get better either. fortunately for him, she could not care less ♥️

I do think tokyo vice is complete, but I do want to finish that sakura wip at some point and also write about suo and mc's sex life after they get together (which is very nasty premaritally and then really vanilla and emotional on their wedding night). I want to finish this kitsune suo pwp first though and finish my ffg commitments too 😭

anyway sorry for yapping so much HAHAH I'm just so happy that you commented on all these aspects of the fic!! thank you for reading and for sending such a wonderful ask 🥺💗

[verflares]

so it’s totally okay if u don’t wanna answer, but when do you think the next chapter of dragonsong will be out? i know writing block can happen — trust me, i am NO stranger — but an update on what’s going on with the story would be cool! like if life is just too much rn you can just say that and that’s totally fine :) honestly i will wait till the end of time for this fic, it’s too good 😭

hi!! no worries, i appreciate the question ^_^ it's fair too, i don't think ive really mentioned what's going on outside of like. tags on various personal text posts tht u'd have to hunt down. honestly i'm a little shy talking abt it or some of my other og projects on here LMAO which is mostly just. that's how i Am and i know most of my followers that i have now are here for my art and maybe my insane ramblings from time-to-time

anyways, atm i don't really have a clear date for when i'll get the next one out... it's still sitting in my files and i Still have an outline for what i want to happen in it + the next few chapters planned out right till the fic's conclusion. but yeah, planning versus execution is a whole other beast.

i Do want to finish it so much, and i Will... its mostly just various combinations of irl, writer burnout, and i've kind of also just been enjoying getting better at art more these past few months - so i'm doing that in my free time instead of writing x_x. so i guess the state of it rn is temporary hiatus?

i've considered some ways in which it might be easier to say, trick my brain into continuing too LOL. i could try putting out shorter chapters, but i worry if itll upset the flow of all the other chapters that came beforehand... feel free to let me know or any other potential ideas and i'll see what i can do!

[mugiwara--ya]

heyyy hi a little life/med update !!

ive been super super busy these past couple weeks w a ton of socialization etc and ngl i think i burned myself out lol last night after we got back home from a con (and the bar stop after it) i had a massive shutdown that lasted hours and im still reeling from it, but ANYWAYS!! med update med update wooo

so! on top of the lifesaving bupropion ive been taking all year & the eszopiclone for sleep i finally !! got put on something for my ocd, lets give it up for fluoxetine to join my beautiful, beautiful cocktail, mwah 💖💝💗💕💞💓

i know it supposedly takes a few weeks to fully Work but im already feeling a MASSIVE difference right off the bat, like yesterday i was at the mall and i ✨ touched the escalator's handrail ✨ i was literally so excited i kept looking at my hand going yoooooo im DOING it im making it HAPPEN like even my friends congratulated me on it kdsfjhakjg it felt silly but massive at the same time lol and of course i still immediately disinfected my hands but the important thing is that I Did It

and idk its like!!! i knew it was BAD like especially these past few months its been just. VIOLENTLY out of control but god the absolute relief ive been feeling is making me feel like i was still grossly underestimating it, it had completely taken over my life. right now its like, i encounter any random trigger and i brace myself for the anxiety spiral to come and then it DOESN'T and its so ??? like i still have The Thought but then i just go "ok" and dismiss it like an annoying notification and thats IT, while the last time i was on therapy i literally described my ocd as having hundreds of those cymbal-banging monkey toys of different sizes just sitting there in my brain Waiting and every single time i got triggered one of them would start losing its absolute shit - for example if im at the supermarket, on top of the everything about existing as an autistic person at the supermarket, thered be like a dozen of them constantly going ALERT ALERT CONTAMINATION CONTAMINATION EEK EEK DANGER DANGER BANG BANG BANG- and now the monkeys r GONE. get turned into mostly-dismissable phone notifs, idiots !!!!!!!!!

the only monkey im willingly keeping!!!!! is the low poly 3d model of monkey d. luffy constantly rotating in my brain <3 kfngskjdfs

also like i still do like, say, my cleaning rituals when i get back home, but idk i just. i feel Normal about it?? like calmly wiping my phone bc phones r Gross and not bc i literally see a green film of Germs And Various Pathogens enveloping it lol. anddd i havent been attacked by violent intrusive thoughts in a minute !! lets see if it stays that way. im generally super sensitive to medications too so im on low doses of everything and i wanna keep it like that lol so heres to hoping it keeps goin like this so i dont have to up my dose 8)

uhh thats about it ! having a bit of Personal Issues tm at the moment tho but im so relieved abt my ocd i kinda have the bandwidth to deal with them lol. i prolly jus need some sleep quiet and to not be perceived by anyone for a solid week.

in other lighter and unrelated news my queue is completely empty rn so it'll be just a liiiittle quiet around here for a bit but ! yeah. also i just watched the latest op anime episode and urhgrhghrghrgh it was so good hhh <3333 so yah if you read this whole thing i am giving you a little kiss on the forehead, mwah, hope you have a great week !!

[svnflowermoon]

☕talk about ur best friend! what're they like? what do u love about them? <3

OMG YAY OK i could talk about my best friends for HOURSSSS (i have a few best friends so i'll talk abt all of them <333)

ok so first there's 🐀 (emoji is an inside joke i made her a felted stripper rat for her birthday) i don't think she knows she's my best friend but idk?? genuinely one of my fav people ever she's literally the funniest person on earth and i love her so much, we've known each other for like 6 years now which is insane to me. on all of our school holidays we have sleepovers where we watch the cringiest movies we can find and make cursed cakes (if you want more context send me an ask lmao 😭) and honestly it's so fun. we wore matching fairy costumes last year on halloween (i was blue, she was green) bc of the whole ✨she was a fairy✨ audio it was so funny and we're gonna do a transition from those outfits into our formal dresses at the end of the year in the same colours hehe (which i helped her pick literally two days ago). also been accused of being madly in love with her which is how you know the friendship is real lmaooo

then there's 🐟(she would HATE me for this emoji LMAOOOO) and she's literally one of my favourite people in the world and ive known her for a year????? like there is a massive part of my heart that is molded perfectly for her and we only met last year??? it's insane to me honestly she's irreplaceable idk what I'd do without her i adore her with my whole heart. literally one of my favourite memories from last year is with her from the eras tour movie like it was a core memory that will live in my heart forever we sung and danced together and at that point we'd known each other for like 6 months??? crazy to me that she's so important to me after so little time like it feels like I've known her my whole life and those kinds of connections are so important to me. but anyway she's so funny and the sweetest person ever and she got me a birthday present 2 months ago??? my birthday's in june 😭😭😭 i love her endlesslyyyy and we have plans to run away to italy together to escape maths. it's so funny as well bc we've been friends for just a year and literally everyone associates us together like "oh you're ___'s lucy!!" and im like hell yeah we've known each other forever- and then it's one year

okayyy and then there's 💐 and ugh she's so sweet we've known each other for like 2 years and we bonded over music and she's literally an angel on earth im so lucky to know her. she's the sweetest, kindest person i know i genuinely cannot express how much she means to me. we go thrifting together and gossip a bunch and we have plans to go to concerts together and ugh she's my pinterest spotify soulmate she's sooo sweet you have no idea <333 cannot express how much she means to me

[iratusmus]

ive been sitting on this for like . months. i know this is like target audience: ME . but i dont care im subjecting the rest of you to it too.

should be noted that this is for an incredibly stupid au that im not going to bother explaining here . a total of like three people probably know what im talking but basically iykyk. will be happy to elaborate though if you ask. anyways fiona/scourge/finitevus/lien-da riichi mahjong nights headcanons

the whole stupid thing starts because fiona watches this dumb anime [knock-off of the legend of koizumi]. the premise is, amongst an... indescribable amount of stupidity, world politics basically runs on mahjong (riichi mahjong, specifically). lots of idiocy devolves from this. i think scourge would probably not enjoy it as much because 1) this requires some knowledge of current. ACTUALLY WAIT FUNNIEST POSSIBLE DIRECTION. legend of koizumi but with famous echidnaopolis/albion figures. okay so 1) this requires some knowledge of echidna history but scourge slept through all of the history lessons so he hasnt the faintest clue who any of these people are 2) following along with the game (while not necessary, you can still get enjoyment out of it without knowing anything abt mahjong through the stupidity of the people playing, but again the problem remains that he doesnt know who ANY of these people are) is borderline impossible and he's mostly just confused the whole time and 3) not enough violence. like yeah people die but thats after they sit and place tiles in orders he doesnt understand for reasons he also doesnt understand dramatically. fiona, though, who put in marginally more effort into her history lessons and is open to picking up new skills decides that she wants to learn how to play riichi mahjong.

so she introduces it to finitevus, who is. okay because on one hand he doesnt respect like almost anybody in this stupid show because they're all arrogant self-important morons, but on the other hand its also kind of offensive. like really offensive. like appallingly offensive. i... honestly i dont know how he would react. also its just really stupid like its so stupid. it has absolutely nothing meaningful or significant to say. its not like. the worst he's ever been forced to sit through (real housewives of mobotropolis was . a lot) but its still pretty bad. either way somehow fiona convinces him to pick mahjong up (after she forces him to sit through a few episodes) because its like um a strategy game and itll like totally . make them smarter, or something. its education right

somehow lien-da gets roped into this (blackmail, maybe?) and they play on the weekends

playing styles:

scourge: incredibly aggressive. "the best defense is a good offense. or even a mediocre offense. or any offense at all." is more or less his motto. cant be bothered to attempt with strategy, doesnt even look at anybody else's discards outside of seeing if he can pick them up to add to his own hand. should be noted that the only reason he doesnt cheat is because it requires too much paying attention to whats going on in the game. usually skirts by through winning before anybody else can. looks for the easiest & most convenient hand and will always try to win as opposed to cutting his losses (after an attempt to score big falls through). often deals into other people's hands. has a stupid amount of luck and has definitely gotten more yakuman than the rest of the group combined. usually ends up with an open hand, doesnt care at all. VERY easy to read, negative poker face.

fiona: tends to lean more on defensive but will sometimes go for a more aggressive style depending on how she's feeling. relatively new to mahjong strategy so mostly just trying to juggle betaori/suji/kabe and doing a mediocre job of it most of the time. on occasion if she gets frustrated or overconfident, she'll just drop the whole thing and only put a minimal focus on defense. doesn't deal into other people's hands too often but when she does its usually into finitevus'. she's picking up tricks from him though and is getting progressively harder to read. prefers a closed hand but if its convenient she's fine with an open one. has a good poker face.

finitevus: very defensive and exclusively aims for really good hands. perfectly fine with cutting his losses in the short run to focus on not dealing in. oftentimes will swoop in in the last few rounds with a crushing defeat for everybody else. really good at reading other people & their hands. can and will use suji to trip other people up. could not be more disgusted that 90% of scourge's wins come via pure luck as opposed to anything else. prefers to keep his hand closed if at all possible. perfect poker face, very hard to read. [+ designated score calculator. calculates it all in his head]

lien-da: generally tries to go for a more defensive/strategic style at first but usually gets overconfident and throws caution to the wind, getting progressively more aggressive (esp when she has a good hand). by the end she still keeps an eye on everybody else's discards for furiten, but not much more than that - other defensive strategies are too time consuming and require too much effort on her part. tries really hard to have a closed hand at the beginning of the game but usually gives up by the end. relatively easy to read, sporting a very mediocre to bad poker face.

win rankings go as follows: finitevus, fiona, scourge (PURELY through luck. keeps randomly getting yakuman to the chagrin of literally everybody else. they are all so mad about this because he doesnt deserve it not even a little bit), lien-da

[phagodyke]

completed the game btw 👍

laptop crashed on me trying to open elden ring the final straw 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[alwastakenofc]

hmmmmm so ! lesser-than-before rant incoming :)

i’ve been playing this game on my phone for the last 3ish weeks bc i’m tryna get $80 from getting to “grand sultan” level thru this app that gives me games to download and rewards me for playing them/hitting checkpoints and stuff idk it’s rly cool but that’s besides the point ! so i figured i would Bounce after the month is up bc like it’s just a gimmicky pay-to-win kind of game where if u don’t keep up daily u fall behind, BUT there’s also a Huge player base for the game (which makes it fun but also gives it that rly insanely competitive edge that makes it hard to miss days without feeling like ur behind). so one of the things i had to do was join a union/guild where i am partnered up with ppl like the guild leader and co-leader and elites and others members ya know? and we can do quests and stuff and it just gives u a good boost to everything which obviously helps u level faster ! so i was like “hmmmm maybe ill make one…” but then i noticed ppl talking in the all chat saying how they’re not new, this is their 3rd, 4th, 5th+ server that they’re hopping on bc they wanna start over again, etc etc so i was like “…. nah im not making my own union LOL” so i ended up joining this one that had free slots and rly didn’t like the guy leading it bc he was kinda rude… so i left, changed my name/avatar, and DM’d the leader of this guild i had my eye on in the first place but was full at the time! they now had 1 space free and i had to wait 24 hours to join bc i just left my last guild… so she said she’d save the spot and BAM, i got in! we talked in DMs abt how i left my last guild bc No One except the leader talked and when he did it was to Demand things from us like “Everyone better donate 200 diamonds or else.” and stuff!! lmao

SO. fast forward to now. it’s been about 3 weeks in the guild and MANNNNNN IVE MADE A FEW FRIENDS, THEYRE ALL SO NICEEEEE 🥺 me and a couple other guild members were up til Midnight last night just talking abt life and where we wanna travel and our jobs and education and Everything !! it was so wholesome and nice and so just idk. pure and innocent and Fun to just have casual conversations with ppl that were complete strangers 2 weeks ago, but who ive gotten closer to and now can have those nice long convos with !! and it was all just in the guild chat so anyone could read the next day lol but idc ! it was fun! plus my name on the game is selene which is Not my real name lol i just like the name a lot and it always makes me giggle when they say “lol, i know right selene??” and stuff and im like heh.. yea, das me 😎 idk the guild leader gave me the “life of the party” tag and said she loves my energy and it just feels so good bc i know i am just so cripplingly socially anxious irl and that’s why i can talk so easily online and love talking online so much more. like im still ME, but… not Fully being perceived to a point where i feel uncomfy or anything LOL . it’s been nice

i think imma keep playing after the month is up, i rly enjoy my guild and the ppl ive met thru it :’)

ANYWAYS!! i also think im gonna go to therapy/go to my family doctor to get reccs on therapists and maybe a psychiatrist? psychologist? idk i wanna get evaluated for… well let’s just save that for when i get evaluated bc if i don’t even have anything wrong with me and my dumbass rly gets laughed out of the office by the doctor saying “LUL no u rly just gotta try harder bruh” imma feel like a damn Fool LMAO. BUT yeah. that’ll hopefully be a thing i book this month.

also gonna be responsible and Not over spend on food when i get paid, like delivery and whatnot… but i Will be buying lifetime subscriptions to a couple japanese apps on my phone that i think will be easy access and help me learn japanese to a point of comfortability before i start college again. 😎

OKAY IM DONE WHEW. rant over :)

[maiverie]

( ୨୧ ) ── ꒰ update ! ꒱

hi hi everyone !! just wanted to share a super quick update <3 i know this account hasn't been properly active in a month so i firstly wanted to apologise for the inactivity and also keep u all in the loop abt what i have planned in the future :>

( note : it's kinda late here so i'll answer asks tmr :0 <3 )

ㅤㅤ↳ the reason for my inactivity is quite multifactorial but boils down to a lack of motivation to write / be on tumblr + many commitments irl !! ive been working + studying a lot, which has kept me busy :(

ㅤㅤ↳ i don't have plans to deactivate this acc or anything so don't be concerned about that!! not that anyone would even care saslkddjsj just wanna put that out there!! i still very much have a passion for writing, though admittedly my motivation has taken a bit of a hit. nothing really to do with you guys / tumblr,,, i think i just have a tendency to overthink things and sometimes writing can be stressful when ur brain literally mf hates itself :’>

ㅤㅤ↳ a few months ago i reached a new milestone (4 digits!!! that is literally so effing slay IM CRYING) but didn't get the chance to say anything soooo THANK U ALL SOOO MUCHHHH AAAA im seriously in awe at that number because tbh i really don't feel like i've achieved much w this acc T_T sometimes im super embarrassed that my masterlist is so puny and i've only got the one completed fic,, but reaching such a cool milestone is more than enough for me to be utterly grateful. in saying that, i'm so so so sorry abt how horrible my updating schedule is :’’> i'll definitely try to work on it and be more consistent :( in the meantime, if anyone has any idea on like milestone ideas then pls pls pls lmk *-* <333

ㅤㅤ↳ anyways, if you're wondering what my plans are next, the first thing i want to do is update & finally complete triage !!! i have about 2-3k written so far but the final chapter will probably reach 7k+ (kms) :’’> i have sm wips i want to publish and start, but i probably won't do anything about them until my other ongoing fics (misconduct and doublespeak) are on a somewhat steady trajectory to getting finished (i.e. i have a good understanding of where they're headed).

ㅤㅤ↳ to any moots that are reading this (but tbh blr literally looks so dead that i wouldn't even be surprised if nobody sees / reads this HAHAHS), i will defs catch up on all ur updates <33 i really wanna be active again on this acc so ill probably be reaching out sometime soon to say hi :’>

ㅤㅤ↳ lastly, i noticed some people are recommending my fics and asldk;fjl;kjew im literally crying like it genuinely makes me so happy that people are even reading my shit like?? hello?? yall got some questionable ass taste but tysm for enjoying my fics :< i gen love yall sm u !! don't !! even !! know !! sooo yeah thank you so much for all the likes, comments, reblogs, recommendations, or any other sliver of interaction bc yall are the best and i love writing and i love enhypen and i love u all MWAH MWAH MWAH !! anyway i'm probably gna sleep now but tysm for reading this long ass post aksjjadjss ill answer asks tmr!!!

ㅤㅤ— lots and lots of luv from mai <333

back to navigation.

[gibbearish]

alright gamers here we go again, once again it is a lovely bouquet of lies, although i'll give him points for trying on some parts. i think he's probably gotten a little bit better but. yeah two months is not long enough for a person to completely change sorry

anyways play by play below the cut, this is not a 100% comprehensive or word-for-word transcript, this is just bits that stood out to me going through it as someone who has watched the plagiarism and youtube video WAY too many fucking times

"i've been reaching out to the people i plagiarized to apologize" - well hey at least he's figured out the word this time, sucks that a couple of those people posted screenshots of your emails and they sucked lmao

"ive heard back from a few of them and they were actually incredibly nice, accepting my apology and just imploring me to do better in the future" yes we are all aware that you can still just say whatever words you want but again people posted screenshots of the emails you sent them

"im a cis white gay man, no matter how much i try to be a good spokesperson, i can never really truly understand the life experiences of other far more put-upon members of the queer community" you didnt "try" to be good at it lmao you deliberately talked over everyone you could. also. put-upon?🤨

"this is one of the reasons that i would use their own words" FUCK OFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

"i never thought that i was the only voice out there as some have said, but being a cis white man i thought i might be able to win over some people who wouldn't otherwise listen unless it was someone who looks and sounds just like them" holy shit. holy shit this dude cannot be serious right now.

"what i thought was inclusive ended up leaving a lot of people feeling left out and even offended" how very delightfully vague

"this fell upon nick too as a nonbinary person, on the ace spectrum" - i havent been paying close enough attention to know if nick was out as nonbinary this whole time but every mention i heard of them i couldve sworn just said gay and ace w nothing abt gender, am i misremembering / did they come out recently or . did he just out them

"they wanted to include nonbinary experiences and asexuality in our videos but since nick's experiences are not universal (...) people felt that we were delegitimizing their experiences because we focused on nicks, and i apologize for that. and im sure that nick does as well." firstly "felt" ok dude secondly no thats not why people thought that thirdly why was the last part so weirdly pointed. why the Look at the camera for that. does he think people havent already been discussing nick's role in all of this

(talking abt jessie gender) "I drew her into this anger spiral of mine that was unwarranted and absolutely ruined a possible friendship" - oh is this what the kids are calling "calling the cops on a transfem" now. he does apologize directly to her and admit he was an asshole there at least

"there was a misunderstanding after that where someone claiming to be a fan of jessie's, yknow, did an internet and threatened to kill me, which is.. yknow, being a person on the internet, death threats are unfortunately not uncommon, at the time though, i was in a very panicked state and so i did report it to the police, i did not report /jessie/ to the police, which is the misunderstanding that people came away with. i did not report jessie to the police, i would have no reason to do that. and it did end up that this person had a prior record with the police of violent acts and they actually lived quite near me. um, so the police took it very seriously, they took it so seriously, in fact, they implored me not to speak to jessie, which i took their advice on. which i shouldnt have, honestly, i should have at least clarified to jessie what was going on and not just left her hanging. and so i want to again apologize for that to jessie. but in that state i listened to the police, which is. maybe not the best decision the whole time because, yknow the cops. don't usually have the best interests of people at heart." ohhhhh yes of course i see, it wasnt calling the cops on a transfem, it was calling the cops on her very real you swear follower who sent you very real you pinky promise death threats and the police caught them and confirmed they were indeed very bad and scary so actually you were right to call the cops! but also i toootally agree with you guys hashtag acad am i right?

"the work nick and i were doing on the channel, we wanted it to be for everyone, we wanted it to be a channel where every queer person would feel welcomed and... we failed at that. that is something that in hindsight i think is impossible to create..." ok like. sure you can't please everyone. but you have to be joking right. it's not impossible to create an actually positive or inclusive space

"...and that's why it's inportant for there to be many different queer voices in spaces like youtube, and there are. whats more important is making those voices discoverable, which is something that i should have been helping with." lmao no kidding

"I often shared queer creators on twitter, but this was when i only had, yknow 800, a thousand twitter followers, and these creators usually has a whole lot more than that. it was a weird... thing, because usually they would have more twitter followers, but a whole lot less youtube subscribers. im not sure what created that dichotomy, but something was definitely off with the algorithm there, where it says Ooh! white male queer! lets push him!" wh. huh. im not typing out the rest of that tangent because it Keeps Going without actually saying anything else but . what????? what does this have to do with anything. why are you talking about twitter to youtube ratios

"I should have done more to share the voices of other queer people. certainly the voices of the people whose works i used, both credited and plagiarized in my videos." look at him go using the big boy word again im so proud

i dont wanna type this but hes saying he felt like he had to make videos fast in order for the algorithm to not leave him in the dust. bb girl youre thinking of tiktok. tiktok is the one that drowns you if you dont post like every other day.

one thing i will say is he said "people who were- people who i plagiarized." so like good for him fighting back against the urge to use passive voice there. and he is listing off specific examples, he's directly acknowledging how fucked the deep cuts video was and is going over yknow Proper Citation Practice. and said "i said it was based on their work but it was. their work. word for word." so i mean good for him there.

however he then goes on to say there were some he did get permission from including SEAN GRIFFIN FROM EVIL QUEENS. LMAO. also i cant find the comment now because he's ACTIVELY DELETING THEM AS IM WATCHING but this part is the only screenshot of any of his claims hes included so far and one of the comments pointed out that the email is from a Different Time Than He Claimed so. lmao.

"i was much more interested in the production of the videos than of the writing of them. so after 3 or 4 videos, i brought nick on as a main writer for the channel." oh we know where this is going

"the idea is that they would write the vast majority of the scripts, i would film/voice and edit the videos, and we would split the money that came in" lmao. now to be fair he goes on to talk about how this is when some of their most loved videos came out and does directly say they werent plagiarized, i dont remember the whole list but at the very least the names he gave werent any of the Big Featured Ones. who knows though lmao

now he's talking about how he lost his job and therefore had to take over more of the writing bc of that, which is why there's another surge of the plagiarism in two scripts after, is because he copy pasted a bunch of things into it intending for those to be the jumping off points while editing it later with nick, but that his memory issues made him forget which quotes were and werent his.

"we shouldve just thrown out all of my contributions to the scripts and filled them in with original writing but we felt we had too much of a time crunch." well at least now when hes blaming nick for things he can come out and say it sometimes, however i do have my doubts that they did actually know bc Why would you not just say that in the first apology.

"(paraphrasing) and then my mom died and i was useless. nick had to take over the writing while i took care of the aftermath because my dad grew up poor and can't read or write" my man im sorry about your mom but this is not the time for a tragic backstory.

now hes talking about how there shouldve been an inheritance from his moms life insurance but the insurance company just refused to pay it out because she. didn't tell them she had family with diabetes? and that voided the entire policy???and that they only refunded one years worth of premiums?????? bitch why are you trying to get back into youtube then go get a lawyer and get that money

now he's saying his mom told him to use the inheritance to make a movie and so when it didnt thats when they decided to try for telos. i cant. sorry everyone mums ghost made me defraud countless people

now he's saying that the plot of final girl wasnt taken from final girl support group, "and final girl is a trope in horror movies. so if using the final girl trope is plagiarism then basically everyone who's made a slasher horror movie since texas chainsaw massacre owes the toby hoover estate some money" and like... ive never read the book and idk how well the little intended plot summary of the movie he gave just now matches up with the one he originally gave. but uh. sounding a little defensive there

ok so he sent nick the final girl script, nick didnt want to share final girl opinion until they got back at which point they said it needed a full rewrite, and also said they wanted to move away to ottowa so james followed. and now is being like "and then once we got there i was like oh shit all my film school connections were back home so we cant film:(("

AHAHA "once we got to toronto nick decided they wanted to move to ottowa about 5 hours away" my dude i think maybe they just didnt want to live with you specifically anymore and then you just trailed along after them like a sad dog

he's giving various reasons for why every movie fell apart and all of them seem to boil down to "we got the script mostly done and then oops! problems! gonna have to abandon it after months of work i guess!" like. one was "we realized it would be a year until we could film anything because winter was on its way and the film was heavily reliant on summer imagery."

he's also saying that by the time the hbomberguy video was released, they still had yet to receive the telos money. uh. hadnt it been like 13 months at that point or something. do kickstarters usually take over a year to pay out

lmao we can expect a product out of telos this year can we. he says he has a producer now, what fucking producer saw your name on the email address and was like "yknow what yeah i can fix him".

lmao "we accepted too many sponsorships so we had to make more videos leading to more copy pasting from me"

now hes saying a bunch of friends reached out to find out why he nuked his social media presence and is talking about the suicide attempt so cw

"to be frank, i didn't want to exist anymore. if you watched my honestly horrendous video in december, you know i tried to make that happen. the not existing thing. but it was more intense than taking too many pills. it wasnt that i didnt want to be alive anymore, it was that i wished id never existed at all, that everyone id ever known would be better off had i just never been there. very george baylee. which is fitting, given it was christmas time. its only thanks to some very VERY dedicated doctors and nurses, and one very good friend, that i'm even here able to film this right now." oh good yes im glad what he apparently absorbed from when he brought it up last time was "they dont believe you, go into more detail" and not "i shouldnt bring this up as part of my apology". why did we stop to make a movie reference halfway through.

"and i'm not going to name her because i don't want to expose anyone else to the... small, but seriously unstable group of people who watched the plagiarism and youtube video and though "well! he should be dead!" like i said, it's a very small group... but when they find out your address. and some of them are actually in your city. they can be terrifying. and they did find my address. and at least a couple of them showed up while i was at the hospital. my neighbors did report them to the police, and i won't go into anymore details than that, i'm not sure if i legally even can, but- theres a reason i left ontario within a week of getting the ok to do so from the doctors." are we for real playing this game again dude. i swear he still has not watched the hbomberguy video we /know/ he lies about getting death threats as a defense mechanism already, in literally this exact way???

anyways now he's saying the videos that are currently up on his channel are the non-plagiarized ones and they were written entirely by nick, thats nice at least. i do not think they will be pointing to your channel at all as a reference for their resume though

lmao hes saying hes editing the other videos down to just be the original work too. sir theyll be 30 seconds long

AHAHAHA AND SOME SPONSORS IN THE NON PLAYGIARIZED VIDEOS ASKED TO BE TAKEN OFF OF THEM

lmao hes releasing another video soon and says "i want to prove that i have the ability to do this without abusing other people's work". and that its gonna be more of a documentary than a video essay. but he pinky promises he'll be citing everyone this time. and that it will have 0 of his own opinions, only cited facts. sir do you think documentaries are just video essays without the opinions. is this your solution to not being able to write your own shit is "well fine i'll just lean into that and make a collage"

"some misinformation made its way into our videos, that is not something that we intended. in some cases it was information that i was told by epople that i considered experts, in other cases it was information that we had researched, in other cases it was things that nick had learned in university. the point being it was never malicious. we didn't- we weren't trying to lie about things. despite what a lot of people think. we were not trying to spread misinformation, that was not ever our intention" baby boy this whole video is misinformation. also it doesnt really matter if you werent ~trying~ to like. shockingly spreading misinformation because you don't know its wrong is. how most misinformation works??

"as for my patreon, everyone can stop worrying about me relaunching it right in time for a billing cycle, that will not be happening. i dont want anyone who doesnt know about the plagiarism or simply forgot to unsubscribe to get billed so im gonna start from 0. i have put together a new patreon account so if you wanna support my documentaries about gay history, fantastic. honestly your faith in me after everything means the world to me. if jot, i completely understand. like i said, ive lost your trust. im gonna work my ass off to earn it back, though. and i know for some of you ill never be able to do that but im gonna try anyway. but this video is not about promoting myself" LMAO STOP I CANT

"this video is about me apologizing. and i am incredibly sorry. *jumpcut*. heavy sigh." I FUCKING CANT IM DYING

"it was never my intention for anyone to feel hurt or left out or excluded, it was never my intention to spread misinformation, and im really really sorry that that happened. and yknow as much as ive tried to explain myself in this video, the memory issues, the ADHD, um... the personal things that were going on in my life with my mom getting sick and then dying and trying to make sure that my dad was ok following that and everything, those arent excuses. there is no excuse for what i did. there are lots of people that make videos on youtube, there are lots of people who make podcasst, tv shows, movies, documentaries, who have ...shit going on in their lives that is very stressful. and they don't plagiarize people's work. there is no excuse for what i did. for everything that happened, whether it be with my mom or memory issues, there was something i could have done to mitigate that." wow very mature sounding! wish it was believable

"and so there is no excuse for the nisinformation and there is certainly no excuse for the plagiarism. i... fucked up. bad. i stole peoples words and thoughts and opinions, that they worked incredibly hard writing and publishing and finding someone to publish their thoughts and opinions and research, hard research that they had done, and yknow in some cases i put them- their names in the opening credits which i thought was fine but- like i said, ive spoken with some of these people now and i understand why that was not ok" PEOPLE TOLD YOU THIS MULTIPLE TIMES BEFORE THE HBOMB VIDEO

god theres so many ads on this thing when youre watching it half speed. btw yes it is monetized, he says specifically so he can give the proceeds to hbomb and kat. lmao.

OH MY GOD HES REPEATING THE THING ABOUT HOW THE CELLULOID CLOSET ALMOST WORD FOR WORD. LIKE. "there were times like with uh, the queer history of hollywood... videos that i released this past spring, they were baded directly on the celluloid closet by vito russo, the book not the documentary. i expanded on it quite a bit but it was based directly on vito's work and i credited him in the opening credits. and i thought it was ok to just do that, because the book was out of print, and vito had... passed away, unfortunately, from hiv complications due to hiv and aids, and i looked at it more as... extending his legacy, making sure that people knew about the work that he did. but i dont think i ever mentioned his name in those videos. he was cred- like i said his names in the opening credits, but i don't think i ever verbally mentioned his name. someone who i have so much respect for, is kind of an idol of mine, and... i never mentioned his name. it wasnt cause i didnt respect him, or anything like that, and it also wasnt becayse i wanted people to think that this was all me if- if that was the case i wouldntve put his name in the credits, i never wanted people to think that this was all me. so thats actually one of the videos i want to make, i want to make a documentary style video talking about vito russo and his life and everything that he accomplished, because he didnt just write the celluloid closet, he did a lot more than that. hes someone that people SHOULD know about." the fact. that this fucking man still feels comfortable talking about him literally at all is insane to me. "i do respect him" very shortly after fucking. "well he was dead so i thought it would be fine". like you actually sat down in front of your camera and said that out loud and edited and posted it and didnt think anyone would be like "SORRY, THAT WAS YOUR THOUGHT PROCESS AT THE TIME????" and that this is somehow better than. just plagiarizing him because you dont respect him over all???? you thought people would react better to you saying that about someone you claim to respect??????????

oh for fucks sake dude

[captainaikus]

in between crying abt Tokyo Revengers ending im having the worst case of Izana brainrot ive ever experienced good God this man has such a chokehold on me rn like it’s not even funny ive been listening to this one song on loop for the past hour just sitting on my fluffy blanket looking off into my post-it covered wall distance and imagining a whole book abt our love story the heck

- ✨ anon

im sorry i keep adding like one sentence things to my previous asks i can be very scatterbrained sometimes sorry but like also i think my Izana brainrot rn is me coping with the ending im still in denial and i feel so empty and i don’t think it’s really hit me yet but anyways yeah i honestly didn’t think it would be Izana who helps me cope with the ending i would’ve thought it would be the pet ship trio or one of them you know? not Takemitchy or Mikey because God knows those two individually and together are just i cannot with them (in an affectionately and a pls never let me forget their story and destroy my heart for the 1000th time why don’t you way i love them so much you have no idea) cause i was in a pet shop trio brainrot during the last few chapters until the last one so the switch to Izana was surprising but definitely not unwelcome anyways yeah - ✨ anon

Please don't apologize !! I'm happy to see messages in my inbox no matter how many times you visit! ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭ ੈ♡‧₊˚

I- I was planning on writing for Izana some months ago. It was an emperor au fic and now I'm starting to think if I should pick up writing for Tr again...

But yeah apparently the latest chapter has everyone shook but at the same time, one of my friends said that it was a good ending and honestly? I think it was. The time mikey and takemitchy broke my heart was when he had turned into bonten's leader and sanzu as well as Haitani brothers were working under him and he had become so broken and depressed and Takemitchy was trying to help him. I was happy when Baji came back cause he was one of my fav characters and the way I was shocked when he died cause of Kazutora... as well as Mitsuya dying as well

the manga was really well made honestly.

I hope you feel better soon starry!

*sending a warm blanket, hugs and plushies*

[yomiurinikei]

"""""canon"""" terurei.

So I was in this fandom months/maybe a year ago, okay? So back when I was in this fandom, on Teruya Otori's English Website (the one with basically no info lol), in his trivia it said that he had a crush on Rei. (It now has been completely removed from his website). This is probably one of the sources that some people thought that Terurei was canon. But when looking around at much older posts/edits, an edit that was made in Nov 2020 had what seemed to be a translated Q&A of LINJU at the beginning.

The translated thing was

Did the DRA survivors eve have romantic feelings towards each other?

- Tsurugi and Rei would have no interest in those kinds of things. Teruya felt that way towards Rei a few times

Now, I have no clue if this is real, but considering the creator of the edit, they definitely saw it and screenshot it from somewhere. Which I have no clue if it was a reliable source.

Now let's assume for a moment this screenshot was real, what exactly does this answer mean?

It clearly says that Tsurugi and Rei are not interested in relationship, and there are other sources that implied Rei may not be interested in relationship overall. And it only say that Teruya feels this way "a few times". Meaning this could be anything from a simple tiny crush that can quickly end to something more, but is very vague, probably meaning even Teruya wasn't too sure.

So if the source of this screenshot (wherever it was taken from) is what people thought made Terurei Canon is not correct. For, even if Teruya's crush was legitimate, it was only one sided.

I think this Q&A question is the source of most Terurei shippers, even though it doesn't even confirm the ship itself.

I don't hate Terurei shippers, I really don't care, but it was something I saw and something I wanted to share.

HI ANON also hi my other followers i see the other asks i have im working on those too it’s 4:45 am and i just spent half an hour straight rambling for the second time today and i am working on getting a professional to. pretty much confirm i do have adhd. all of this to say i’m working on other asks this is just one i can answer rn before bed

ANYWAYS HI ANON!!! IVE i’ve been here so long by now. not the longest but like. consecutively. i’ve been going strong for a longgggg time now. SO LEMME CHAT ABT THIS

under the cut forrr. length, uh, cw terurei,, also this is so messy im tired and it’s genuinely freezing in my room that’s a whole conversation but it’s a bit hard to type. anyways. tl;dr anons 100% right

okay. yeah. ur like. none of what u said was wrong!!! i don’t like. debating on whether or not linujs q&as are trustworthy because. that’s a whole convo about when they should and shouldn’t be listened to- BUT also because. like. it’s vvv old fandom drama but while linuj does answer peoples questions, anyone can contact him,,,

people have used linujs q&as to lie and spread misinformation before

and it was a huge fucking mess and guys it was really bad and. yeah. so.

i can’t speak on whether that q and a was real, but!!!!! it very well could be, it very well couldn’t be. i’ve seen. prolly the same screenshot/people discussing the same q and a as what ur talking about, i know what ur on abt even if i don’t know it’s validity; like u said, let’s just go with it real!

rei is officially not going to be in a relationship with anyone. if we trust any q and a. then that’s the truth. i can’t remember if it was said in a q and a or a blog post (i highly doubt it was a game thing) but rei is explicitly like. celibate. tbh that’s the biggest reason i question the validity of that q and a but it could also be just inconsistency/smthn that changed as she grew up.

either way,,, she’s not into teruya, lol. like i generally do trust that this q and a was real and just go “okay linuj that’s nice linuj i’m making all ur cast gay and trans now linuj byeeeee linuj” and also like u said,,, like. whatever teruyas feelings were, if we treat the q and a as canon,, it still doesn’t mean jack??

rei Does Not Like Teruya Or Relationships. teruya is extremely mlm coded (which i can and will go into but he’s probably the most mlm coded out of anyone in either game) so,, if people are using the fact that teruya was, jsut after being heavily traumatized, maybe pining a little sometimes. to erase reis equally as canon/official lack of desire for a relationship

…..well. that’s uh. i don’t wanna be mean but no it’s 🤡

which isn’t to say ur not allowed to ship terurei! i dont vibe with it just because neg associations but that’s just a matter of me engaging with content for it- i actually have 0 immediate issues with people who ship terurei tbh lol (it is 4:57 i may think that over more and realize i forgot smthn tomorrow)

but like,, yeah. it’s not canon whatsoever. im not gonna tell people what to believe and take as canon, but,,, there’s no other evidence for terurei other than this q and a with questionable legitimacy, anddd,, it disproves terurei as a ship that would ever happen. it’s one sided, and that crush isn’t a relationship (meaning: the relationship ship between teruya and rei, not meaning a romantic relationship) defining trait; as in, it doesn’t define the way the two interact, it’s not. That Big that teruyas motivation whole interacting with rei is impacted by this crush of it even does exist in sdra2

im. extremely tired and i don’t wanna go through and edit and actually outline and organize. usually when replying to smthn like this i divvy it up and think abt how i’ll organize things and then type it all out in one go but nah u guys got this all as i thought of it 100% unfiltered. this post is extra stamped with the “pls ask me for clarification/to rephrase things if they come across concerningly or confusingly” stamp but. uh.

yeah. anons right terurei isn’t canon whatsoever and the only dubious evidence that exists proves that it’s 100% one sided

[jaekaicx]

so ive had this idea for an amphibia fangame for a lil while now-

(LONG post)

its based around the idea that sometime after anne got sent back to earth, she decides to sneak out one night to visit sasha and marcys bedrooms and poke through their stuff. this causes a bunch of memories to come back to anne through flashbacks while she tries to process everything thats happened and her feelings abt their friendship.

i was thinking itd be mostly a visual novel type thing. maybe with a few small choices, but the story would be mostly linear. thered be around 3 main story beats: a prologue bit w/ anne sneaking out of her house, marcys bedroom, and sashas bedroom. also one of the main mechanics would be looking at one of their bedrooms and clicking on random objects of importance and triggering a flashback sequence.

it came from the idea that anne will probably try to just shove all her emotions down and try to ignore her feelings abt true colors and everything that went down then. especially with what we saw in the sneak peek, anne will probably try to hide her emotions and bottle them up, which is obviously not healthy. so eventually shes gonna have to work through her emptional baggage and try to process everything.

i havent thought through EVERYTHING just yet, just some more major plot points and maybe one or two ideas for flashbacks. nothing too solid yet. but heres a bit more detailed runthrough of the plot

summary - prologue

so it would start off with anne at home. she and her mom are talking outside annes room. her moms concerned abt how annes been handling everything that happened in amphibia but anne keeps brushing everything off. her mom tries to get her to open up, but she keeps dismissing her and eventually shuts herself in her room. after taking a bit to cool off and think anne decides that shes gonna take the night to just ride off her emotions and stop repressing them for once. she also makes an impulsive decision to sneak out and check out marcy and sashas rooms.

anne goes to gather her stuff in her room, and just as shes about to climb out the window, sprig walks in to check on her. hes still rly concerned abt his big sis but he knows he cant stop her. he tries to go with anne, but she tells him she needs to do this on her own. so, sprig lets her go and tries to cover for her while shes gone.

so at this point i’ll probably give the player the choice of whose house to visit first. it doesnt rly impact the story or whatever, but i guess it might have a small emotional impact depending on whose house u choose to go to first??

(quick note: after this bit, there arent too many specific details for the plot and stuff like that. its largely just an overall idea of how the plot is gonna go. and even then, there isnt much to it. i didnt think that far ahead yet, which is why there isnt as much refinement yet. so far i just have general ideas for how annes gonna get to the bedrooms, with a couple of vague flashback ideas. just keep that in mind; this whole thing is still being thought over and planned as im typing this out)

summary - sasha

with sasha, annes still rly conflicted abt how she feels abt her. of course shes still rly hurt by being backstabbed by her twice and swordfighting her as many times. but as much as she hates sasha she cant bring herself to fully give up on sash. she hates her guts but deep down shes still willing to give sash another chance.

there may or may not be a small sequence where anne has to sneak into sashas house, but eventually she works her way into sashas room. im not entirely sure abt the details of sashas house n her family yet. im probably gonna wait for info from s3 until i solidify anything, but for now i do know that sashas family has a big house n theyre probably rich.

so anne goes into sashas room and its been left pretty much untouched ever since annes birthday, save for the few times someone came in to dust things off. again, dont rly have all the details for sashas room, but it kind of has a vibe of controlled chaos, with organized clutter and a bit of a touch of a rebellious teen girl. one detail i do want to have is a calendar opened up to the month the trio disappeared, with annes birthday circled and highlighted so much that its impossible to miss.

the calendar itself might include a flashback. im thinking of also having a varsity jacket and some old stuffed animal be different “artifacts” that trigger their own memories. there’ll be a bunch more, but those are the only ideas i have so far fjsbndnd

summary - marcy

ok so i want to be rly mean about marcys segment: this is going off the theory that marcys parents moved away while the trio was in amphibia.

anne doesnt know this yet tho, so shes in for quite a surprise when she turns onto marcys street to find a realtor sign on the front lawn. the clues are all there: an empty driveway, sign on the lawn, an overall empty vibe coming from the house. but it doesnt completely register at first. its not til anne actually comes up close does she notice the sign.

anne tries to deny it, and decides to prove to herself that “no marcys parents wouldnt do this. theyre not that cruel. im just gonna check marcys room myself.” the front doors locked, so she just goes over to marcys window and climbs in.

but its completely empty.

ok not totally empty, but a lot of marcys furniture and stuff is gone, except for a few stray toys and other “junk.” the home guys (idk what theyre called????) are still kind of in the process of cleaning everything out, so theres still some stuff left here and there around the house. but its still way too empty. and its yet another gut punch for anne.

anne searches the rest of the house a bit more, hoping that shes just hallucinating. but no, marcys parents are really gone. she tried to deny it before, but now she has more of an idea of how shitty the wu parents are. so anne decides to just mope around in marcys old room, checking out the stuff their parents left behind.

maybe she finds an old blanket marcy liked when he was rly young. or an old rubiks cube from marcys vast collection. a cnc figurine, some cards, a pride flag, and old diary? a couple of other old toys, an old report card or two, or maybe even some stray clothes. whatever anne finds, its all thats left of marcy, at least in LA.

it really doesnt leave anne in that much of a better emotional position. she already felt conflicted enough about what happened in true colors and what she found out abt marcy. but seeing even a small glimpse of what marcy was dealing with, it just makes her more confused. marcy was such a sweet kid! theres no way they couldve done anything wrong. yet here anne was, betrayed by both of her childhood friends.

only now is anne really taking the time to process the fact that marcy essentially kidnapped her and sasha with the calamity box. he didnt mean to do it, and theres no way they couldve known the box would actually work, but it doesnt completely excuse marcy. his actions still hurt anne and sash, and while they meant the best of intentions, it didnt rly come through that way.

and now marcy was dead. stabbed in the back by the newt king.

and now annes curled up in an empty bedroom, wrapped up in one of marcys old blankets, trying to wrap her head around her feelings about marcy while reminiscing in the past.

summary - extras/epilogue??

i kind of like the idea that anne ends up drifting off in which ever bedroom ended up being the second one she visited. she slowly comes back to consciousness, with her surroundings feeling somewhat familiar, only to wake up in horror bc “OH SHIT I FORGOT TO GO BACK HOME” im not completely sold on the idea tho bc it feels a bit abrupt and like too much of a tone shift?? idk it doesnt feel exactly right

but anyways, im also playing around with the idea of a small epilogue scene with the calamity trio hanging out in annes room, a good amount of time after amphibia ended. dont know what theyre doing in there, but theyre just chilling and feeling a bit nostalgic i guess.

but uh yeah thats pretty much what ive got for the overall idea. it doesnt feel too out of reach, but somethjng like this would definitely be ambitious. i could mayyyybe handle writing out the vn and drawing the character sprites, but i have no idea how to code a vn or draw detailed backgrounds, both of which would be pretty important to this fangame fjsndj. so i might consider having help with this.

THIS ISNT ANY SORT OF PROMISE OR WHATEVER. id rly love to follow through and make this fangame a thing, but im not making any guarantees. i have no idea if i’ll actually follow through, but i would definitely love to.

who knows. maybe in like a couple years this might actually become a thing. but for now i have no idea