#anyway yeah I'm still sad
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😔
#do you guys remember how like a number of people texted me on the day that ep aired to ask if I was okay#that's hashtag real nanami nation vibes#anyway yeah I'm still sad#jjk#nanami kento#jujutsu kaisen#mine#kento nanami#meme
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okay is she being actually immature or is it just a woman over 30 expressing a human experience you find to be immature.
like yeah. at certain ages... let shit go. im not defending the real immature shit. im not defending the karen you're picturing. i worked in retail i hate those people too. (once somebody got mad at me because she didn't like how our winter window decor was a snowman smoking a pipe. i wish i was joking).
but men at 57 will write books about how 17 year old girls are soooo sexy. they will invent worlds where women have to be naked for "armor reasons." they will write songs that treat women as objects. people rush to defend them. meanwhile a woman at 35 will be like "heartbreak is hard, actually" or "i feel betrayed by a friend" or "i am struggling with something emotionally." immediately people will say stuff like this woman is 35 by the way. by the way this woman is SO OLD to be experiencing this. BY THE WAY.
im 31, almost 32. the other day a poet was blasted online because at her "big age", she had written a poem about feeling unloved. top comment was "this woman is 29 by the way." this woman is too old to still be useful, by the way. she has to behave better . maybe if she was a good wife and mother she could stop existing loudly, and the story could continue on without her. this woman has served her purpose, by the way. she's so cringe, by the way. at 29 - so old! - she still hasn't figured out that her existence should be one of shame.
#what the fuck.#unfortunately by the time i'd switched accounts (from personal to my poetry one)#i couldn't find it :(#this is why u SEND URSELF THE POST. WHICH I KNOW TO DO BUT!!!#i was so mad i just was like “i'm about to tear this commenter in twain” and . lost da post#if u urself are the 29 and got recently flamed by instagram#i love u. come here. write with me. i was about to pick up a sword for u.#i mean a BIGASS sword.#like we all know im a wlw girlie but the way ppl will be like ''id NEVER write sad poetry about a MAN not LOVING me!!!"#..... wowwwww ur so cool. anyway. people often experience emotions regardless of what u consider cringe.#& if ur gonna shame straight/bi women for feeling a certain way. hope u never write about the#weird relationship between u and ur father. or feeling different from ur brother.#or how ur male best friend fucked u over. since it's SO CRINGE. to have ANY feelings caused by a MAN#like be so for real. beloved. nobody is fucking saying this when men do it.#''oh it's cringe to like a woman or feel heartbroken by her.''#controlling women's feelings and actions???? it's more likely than u think.#btw op is nonbinary do NOT be gender essential on this post i'll kill u with my teeth#edit: btw for the person who dm'd me ''when is it misogyny and when is it actually valid''#pretty easy. if a man had done it#would it be cringe? . like if a man sang a sad song about ''she broke my damn heart''?#if he said ''i want to have kids with her'' or something sexually explicit?? like would u even LIKE IT if a male poet had said it?#& if it's like. nah a 35 yr old man being upset about this is cringe too. yeah it's just cringe. that exists. we both know it does.#but .... often i see this ONLY about women. and i can't help but hear like. how back in middle school#we were fed the lie ''girls mature faster.'' ... why do i have to be emotionally regulated? but if a man wrote about the same things?#..... idk . im pretty anti cringe culture to begin with. but this one feels so bad to me . ur still a person past 33.
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Captain Francis Crozier, at Furthest North.
#the terror amc#francis crozier#my art#can't believe it took me 2 rewatches AND getting refs for this to realize it's the hungarian state opera house. girl i was there last month#anyway yeah i was looking at gifsets of the last shot of the show and feeling nauseous with emptiness etc etc when#the thought struck me that it looks an awful lot like the tableau vivants from the ep1 flashbacks in its stillness#i have no idea whether that was an intentional reference (a sort of twisted mockery of how that scrubbed and polished portrayal of history#contrasted with the deeply sad and inglorious reality#or some sort of meta about storytelling itself. i'm not really smart enough to say lol) but i made this anyways. enjoy#pattern recognition go brrrrrrrrrrrrrr#i bent over backwards trying to make this symmetric and harmonious. it isn't but if i don't post it now i never will
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if i failed to protect my kid during the apocalypse and they almost died wandering on their own but got rescued by a team of four competent, battle-experienced adults who cared about them very much and made them feel less scared and useless but refused to let them fight, i think that would be a pretty decent outcome and i'd be pretty okay with it. sure i could dream up a better situation but there's a hell of a lot of worse ones too.
#it's not like they took bonnie away from a safe lil village.. bonnie was on the verge of collapse!!#and no village is safe!!!!#better traveling to the place that will be last to freeze than left at some village that will freeze sooner#(and we can guess than nille agrees‚ since she and bonnie did not wait in bambouche to be frozen)#better ready for battle behind a team of fighters than caught unawares among people who have never fought#(regular people are obviously struggling right now - even nille failed to protect bonnie)#even with the king#if the party fails the land is frozen ANYWAY#is it really better to leave bonnie in dormont? distraught‚ abandoned? being held back from following by strangers?#is that really a better moment to be stuck in for eternity?#yeah maybe something worse would happen in the house#but sadnesses could attack the village too!#taking bonnie with them is absolutely a reasonable decision given all of the circumstances#i may be biased by my own nille characterization#HOWEVER#this is also my opinion as a parent u^u#like i might still be freaking out about it#but htat's. inevitable no matter WHAT it is that happened#bonnie WAS stuck in a bad situation and even the best solutions can't undo that#so yeah i'd be WORRIED#but i'd also be grateful the people who found my kid were decent folks who tried their best and did quite well all things considered#😭😭😭😭#thoughts#thoughts about bonnie#isat talk#i'm sick of not being able to fandom tag my posts that i don't want to put in the fandom tag so there now it's filterable lol
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hello hi I have no idea how I started drawing again
#fanart#sketch#bnha#my art#league of villains#shigaraki tomura#toga himiko#togachako#yeah one of these is literally called by a ship name#so yeah#dabi#toya todoroki#I lost my paper figure of Toga I made 5 years ago and I still process this#like... how the hell did I manage that I have no idea#also I remembered today that I missed her bithday due to me working#so I missed a lot of birthdays AND end of mha AND a ton of GF stuff were the only things keeping me sane#bc while I read or thing of mha I'm not looking sane enough#also I needed a break#BUT STILL it's sad that I missed so many things#anyway goodnight#it's 3 am
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Unsettling possession art was inevitable, let's be honest, I'm surprised it took me this long to post any
Shiny ink woooooooooo
Delightful artist @modmad's old inktober art is what implanted the idea of shimmery gold-eyed Bipper in my head, and I encourage you to go look at their stuff! It's incredible, and very, very shaped!!
#eggin creatin'#dipper pines#bipper#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#sock opera#cw blood#cw possession#it's in black but it's still meant to be blood so yeah#couldn't resist putting in a lil bit of blood you know how it is#gonna be honest I'm a huge fan of exaggerated/pushed facial expressions#so fun to figure out and so unsettling to look at#I love making characters look seconds from snapping honestly it's so fun#also if things look wonky on this it's because I did the sketch after midnight and didn't tweak it too much#also tape beloved tape for clean lines beloved even triangles my beloathed#I friggin love the possession trope it's so fun#if I'd known gravity falls had so much bodily possession I might have looked into it sooner#delightfully disturbing! hmm yes very fun#as I write this my hands are dry cracked and have blood on a knuckle but I've held off on lotion because it's so GREASY UGH#and I can't DRAW LIKE THAT UGH#anyway I must away for moisturization of my sad little hands#have a good night! thanks for looking! :>#edit: OH and sorry if the tag is bothersome still kinda fuzzy on tagging etiquette on here sorry
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reading through old journal entries from yaevinn. first of all WOW bro is gay. secondly i hope y'all know i am imagining angst with a happy ending for him. finally gets closure and then lives with his partner and their dog in a cottage and writes letters to his friends. i like a happy ending for him.
#the citrus speaks#this bard needs therapy#healing hands#(mentioned)#i haven't thought about the witcher in a while#just. still coming down from the heavy stress from ttrpgs.#it gave me a sad little pang in my heart though#i'm not sure if or when i'll start playing again#but i do miss the chucklefucks#and i find it funny that we ended on the cliffhanger *ever*#but yeah. i think yaevinn's story is a hopeful one.#i think despite the tragedy of the witcher the chucklefucks are a group of hope through hardship#and that's why i like them#apart from them just being great characters#like not to brag but we all ate lol#anyway#idk miss them
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Anyway ✌🏻
#this me trauma dumping and venting now 🥰#the last 3 days feels like 3 years#i lost my kitten (while being away)#and i got the news while driving in the middle of ni where#and then immediately after i arrived at the hotel i got sick and barely was able to open my eyes#the 2nd day i managed to go complete the work assigned to me without passing out lmao#but after that i had to help deliver a baby 😀#with so minimal equipment and the ambulance arrived so late#it wasn't my first time but it was still traumatizing 🥱#but hey! the joy of bringing a life or whatever they say (liars)#and now I'm still not home and still sad and angry about what happened to my kitten 🚶♀️#and i have a stomach bug and can't travel home now#i guess thats it if you're still reading this wow kudos 🤨😘#also my mom thought i was dead chill lady i didn't answer my phone for only 12 hours 🤨#Anyway#fun and action#sira's shenanigans#<- yeah good i remembered this#i think I'm cursed tho tommy come lift it 😢
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Today's mood
#yes i dreamt about my lovely ex-bf from nearly a decade ago#yes it was the best dream in forever#and yes i am feeling the ever present loneliness ACUTELY today#gonna try and get out of it and enjoy my holiday anyway but damn. damn. thank you brain#i still feel giddy about the dream but the sadness is starting to creep in more and more#need to remind myself i'm just getting worked up about a made up version of him my brain cooked up for some reason#it just felt so real and so good. ughhhh.#i'm usually quite good at coping but you know how dreams can really fuck with you? yeah#nttalks
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Sometimes all you need is a good ol' coffee shop au tbh.
#i'm cold and in a mood to be fluffed 🥺 and angsted#the one good thing about holiday season is the amount of coffee shops/ bakery/ otherwise fluff and angst fanfics#it's like hallmark movies but 10000x better and they actually get to fuck and curse and act like real people#my bts ffic archive is like 50% exclusively holiday-themed fics lmao. they are cosy! and sexy !#like yeah give me grumpy yoongi in the midst of snow and baking cookies 🥺#if there's a little exes to lovers thrown in??? or enemies to lovers?? WOOOOOOOOOO YEAH#you can take my X Reader fanfiction out of my cold dead hands. leave yeen alone 😤#(yeen is y/n)#anyways. i am in fact not reading anything rn as it's very late and i'm STILL sick and can't sleep but also reading rn is no bueno#but i am making a list of the things i need to catch up on + want to indulge in#since i'm travelling next week and will finally have time to read#wanna catch up with at least ditf and edging fitness before i see sleep token. because after that i will have NO TIME in december#and i prefer to re-read my fav cosy stuff to shake off the Holiday Big Sad#which actually isn't too bad this year but maybe because i've been BIG SAD for a few months now and i can't even tell the difference anymore#ahem. ANYWAYS! let's not go into that#hmmmmmmmm i know i'm using this as a diary at this point but! if anyone's actually nosy enough to have read through all this#here's a little surprise: ✨🎁✨#🦦🥏🦫 <- an otter and a beaver playing frisbee 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹#darya talks to herself
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Every time I draw Mamagi it does AoE damage (I am also in the area of effect)
Lighthearted bonus:
#enstars#hiiro amagi#rinne amagi#i don't know if this is a bad time to be amagi-posting given that hiiro's fs2 just dropped but. oh well#also this might be the last thing i draw for a bit because i am in the final stretch of this semester#if you sent in a request. i will get to it and thank you for your patience#anyways i know i'm kinda being like 'haha rinne mama's boy' which like. yeah but also sometimes--#--sometimes you're an adult in their 20s and like. yeah sure you're technically an adult or whatever but you still feel like a kid yeah?#and sometimes you just maybe want your mom to help you when you're lost or confused or when you need someone to tell you it'll be okay#but you won't get that for whatever reason#sincerely: an adult in their 20s#....can you tell why rinne is like. a vibe to me now#anyways i'm not saying mamagi dying was a necessary evil but if hiiro and rinne had an adult who actually loved them at home they probably-#-wouldn't have left and we wouldn't have the main story#if she was alive today tho she'd be going to their lives sorry i don't make the rules (yes i do)#if she ends up being exactly like the rest of their village in some future lore i'm gonna be so sad.#she'd throw hands with niki's parents#imagine leaving your sons behind because you straight up died (couldn't really do anything about that)#meanwhile your son's boyfriend's parents just. up and left him because they could#also posts with her will be tagged mamagi#if you read all that <3#mamagi#she'd adopt all the bees and alkaloid too#imagine if they got their singing skills from her#also mamagi 1 rinniki shipper (also does not care it's not legal)#rinniki
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#I've read some of you talking about your irls reaching out#Positive and negative thinga#And I'm... In the middle#I haven't hidden my love for 1D since it took over my life 3 years ago#So the people that know me know this about me#Granted they probably know more about Louis but still#One of my closest friends was a bit insensitive at first and I just couldn't reply#She then sort of came through and has been checking in#I don't think she realized how much it mattered to me#Then I told my best friend who's still back home#I also don't think she understood how important they are to me#She hasn't checked in again but she has sooo much shit on her plate that I don't even blame her although it still... A little bit#But I'm also like trying not to think they actually knew how seriously important these bois are to me#Anyway. Another friend... I saw him right after I found so I was still very much in shock and he knows about them and my deep connection#Saw him the next day he hugged me and asked me how I was and this was after the shock wore off and I had cried all night#I almost broke down again... But he hasn't checked in again and I'm a bit sad about it#Someone I met briefly in the summer and got to talking about the bois reached out and asked and I was glad they did#My sister has been checking in which has been very nice#Again... Idk... I don't need them to understand or be all over me asking or anything#It's just... Yeah.#And it just reinforces my gratitude for this space and the friends I've made the past couple of years#I have no idea where I'd be if I didn't have this and you all#But then again... The biggest reason I'm still in this community is the people I've met#So of course I would always have you here#Understanding something that outsiders could never#It's like trying to explain why Louis is so important to me... If you don't feel you won't get it#Rambles ramble#My eyes hurt
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why did my ex i haven't talked to in months just texted me to say liam payne is dead??????
#it's not like i was a liam fan....neither is my ex i think?#anyway yeah it's still sad#but i'm confused as to why they would text me that lol#we literally haven't talked since july#except the other day when i saw them on their apartment balcony as i was going to vote? we just exchanged a wave#i am so confused#(sorry if this is how you learn of his passing)
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i don't think i'll ever get over how people treat kids that aren't good in school as worthless no matter what. "oh it can't be that bad" my guy idk how to tell you this but the last time i went to a normal high school the principal called me into his office to brag about how he failed me in all of my classes before the semester was even finished & i should quit while i'm ahead cuz i'm too stupid ("officially" diagnosed as such by a school counselor & a psychiatrist!!) to succeed. & this is considered normal
#''poor teachers!!'' yeah well at least they can fucking quit & go work somewhere else#''okay but times are different than when you went to school in the 1970's'' this was 2016 my guy. shut the fuck up#''well maybe you were a violent & severely misbehaving kid!'' i wasn't. i have ADHD & severe anxiety disorder & depression#my biggest crime was being too exhausted & dopamine deprived to do my homework#my dad talks about how he was treated in school & i'm like damn dude i went through the same exact shit#how is it that a majority of teachers & principals are still abusive power-tripping pieces of shit 60 years later#why haven't things changed#well actually the answer is simple & it's because they want disabled people to disappear#& if abled students that simply disagree with the way things are done get caught in the crossfire then that is acceptable#because anyone not fit to make billionaires a billion more dollars should just die!#anyways here are my original tags from that gravity falls post i just reblogged:#I know this is supposed to be an appreciation post but like. ''for being the ''dumb one'' he's surprisingly rational.'' seriously??#as ''the dumb'' but ''surprisingly rational'' one of my family this is THEE biggest misunderstanding & it drives me up the fucking wall#just because a person struggles in one area doesn't mean they're stupid & should be an irrational dumb dumb idiot baby holy fuckkk#sorry to OP but even when people try to ''appreciate'' stuff like this they can't help but throw in insults#simply because they genuinely believe that ''even though you're stupid you SURPRISINGLY act competent sometimes'' is a compliment#I'm less mad about this & more sad that this kind of shit is still so prevalent in 2024#both Stanley & Stanford are smart & competent & rational#they just show it in different ways & exceed in different (sometimes overlapping) subjects#this is normal for human beings but the big societal scam is that if you don't do it in the way Ford does then you're stupid & a failure#& being surprised that Stan is also smart & competent in his own ways is the biggest sing that you fucking fell for it dude#btw before i get @ ed for this. i WAS that kid#i was so much that kid the school actually diagnosed me with stupid & spiteful & i was told to quit while i was ahead (they failed me befor#obviously this is very personal for me but also i don't think people realize the language they use is on purpose & it's used specifically t#& it's still happening right now & that just. makes me wanna cry honestly#like why are people still surprised that people can specialize in something despite bad grades in school#you know. the thing we all know is literally rigged to either put you in jail or in a factory to make billionaires more money.#man sorry for the rant the original spirit of the post is super correct but like fuck HS grade-centric judging of people's entire character#Stan being able to defeat Bill is just not at all surprising if you were him or knew/know someone like him#or really paid any attention at all to the show while watching it
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WAIT YOURE A MOTHER 3 FAN TOO????? BEST BLOGGER ON THIS WEBSITE FR FR
NJDASNJKDAS YEAH YEAH for the few people who have known me long enough to know my Origin Story. I actually joined tumblr ten years ago as a Mom 3 ask blog :") It literally was the Start of my online presence here and I hold it so near and dear to my heart 🥰
#I will always be a Mom 3 fan at heart. That was my ORIGIN baby#I had that ask blog before I even had THIS blog#Which I'm p sure turns ten next month. GOD.#Anyway asktwinheroes started in January of 2014 I believe. So yeah. A DECADE ago#Which is INSANE to me#Anyway I love Mom 3 so so so much it's such a brilliant game#It's funny and charming and heartbreakingly sad sometimes#I bawled my EYES out at the ending. The first time I played it my mom literally thought smth was wrong#She was like ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU HURT??#Me: C-C-CLAUSSSSS 😭😭😭#Claus still remains one of my comfort characters and one of my FAVORITE characters in all of media of all time.#PERIODT!!!#ANYWAY yeah I am a Mother 3 fan...to put it lightly...LOL#Shima answers questions#Mother 3#Mother series
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You know what's fucking stupid? The little mean voice inside my head that tells me being in a fandom is childish and "aren't you too old for that" and "aren't you feeling ridiculous caring (and projecting) so much for/onto fictional characters" bc literally no MUM, I'm in fact just doing what I love and it's cruel that I feel ridiculous to this day that I'm building up my personality through fictional characters bc I never knew who I really was and fandoms are giving me the opportunity to explore that. Yes ofc that's not "normal" or whatever but is it really that bad? Like I'm feeling better through that, it's giving me motivation to do things. So yeah... Thanks.. another reason I have to unlearn shame I suppose.
#johnny's silly rambles#when i was crying in school and maybe had some merch clothes on I'd feel so ashamed of myself#like oh you're crying and probably thinking what your fav character would do? that's pathetic#and ofc I'm not that anymore like I'm proud of my fandoms and I'm not hiding the fact that I'm in them#and i can even tell people about why i have certain merch and stuff#but back when i was a child i hid that i liked a character better than some people their fucking social security number#i taught myself not to react when their name dropped and not to blush and stuff#which is ridiculous like what's so bad about liking a character????#but past me was so ashamed of everything i enjoyed...#which is making me extremely insecure about the things that i like now as well tho#like when someone would say they don't like bsd I'd feel genuinely hurt#hm actually not bsd as a whole probably. it'd probably be more like if the person didn't like ranpoe#or when my mum said that she thought mtp was absolute garbage#(we watched the first 10min btw...)#like thanks... you could've phrased that better and now I'm insecure af and sad..#“but i can say i didn't like it” yeah well...#maybe that's my fault for being this insecure#but still i just think that was a dick move#anyways uhhhh thank you for reading this long and also sorry lol#vent
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