#anyway this was word vomit from earlier but yknow

[prettycoolducks]

Soooo I got some doctor who thoughts. Below the cut. Very spoilers.

FIRST OFF. I have to clear the air. Space babies sucked. It sucked bad. And it wasn't the ugly cgi baby mouths (ugly cgi is a staple of doctor who and cannot be criticized). Aside from the unfunny fart and booger jokes, this episode felt childish and not in a fun way. The "point" of the episode was handed to us in a very heavy allegory. Which is... fine. Not unusual but it doesn’t necessarily make for a good episode of doctor who. Also. Every important bit of info about the doctor was spilled in an exposition vomit pretty early on. From the get go we know pretty much every bit of trauma the doctor has. He spills it pretty readily and without hesitation. At first I thought this was just a case of bad writing, telling not showing (and there definitely is a lot of that regardless), etc. But after the devils chord I think there might be some more depth to that. I'll come back to that later. Back to space babies. The episode ends on a pretty bad fart joke, and the strange talking babies bit did not help one bit. I will say, I think I would have enjoyed this episode a bit more if the babies either: communicated telepathically, or the show just used the pre-established fact that the doctor speaks baby. Babies that talk is a joke that just... never lands well for me, and often ends with a lot of "ewww potty humor." So if they just didn't talk I would like it a bit more. Also. Um. The doctor said the word space babies like 10 times at least that episode. Why couldn't he just call them babies? Calling them space babies could be a fine one off joke. (I can very clearly imagine 11 being like, "babies, babies on a space ship, babies in space.. space babies!" And Amelia or someone rolling their eyes and we're done with it.) Instead it was the world's most nothing repeated joke. Whatever. There are episodes worse than space babies. It is slightly below mid but not bad in a way that makes me mad (eg sleep no more). I will say, it is easy to focus on the bad in this episode, but there were some highlights that I'd like to talk about, like the fact that it snows when Ruby thinks about her past... hmmm... I'll get to that later.

So. The devil's chord. It is very quickly established that the doctor and ruby have had some offscreen adventures, but I didn't find that quite believable? Not in the sense that I don't think they did but it just doesn't come across as very believable with the fact that it is only their second adventure in the tardis together and it is the third episode in the season. And stuff like Ruby being like, "you never hide!" despite their last episode being the episode where the doctor hides. I need some control episodes away from the major plot here for lines like that to happen. Some real "weird aliens in space" episodes that have no bearing on the rest of the plot, yknow? It felt like this episode should've been a bit later on the season. Also. This season is only 8 episodes long. It is short. I think a problem with this formula especially for shows like doctor who means it doesn't leave a lot of wiggle room for character moments and low stakes episodes. And you can definitely feel it here and in stuff like Flux. I enjoyed Flux to bits but when something didn't work it just didn't work, because there were no chances to make up for it with other episodes.

Okay. Complaining over. Devil's chord was really really good. As soon as we got into the meat of the episode itself I immediately forgot about my earlier woes with it. It was very engaging and there were a lot of fun fourth wall breaks that didn't break the spell at all. And. Coming back to my earlier statement: I think it was very clear this episode that the doctor just openly stating his trauma is actually him deflecting very hard. Like. "Yup! Everyone I know is dead ^_^ and maybe my granddaughter too! :D anyway! You wanna go see the beatles?" I'm better because you got better my ass. Anyway. Maestro was fun the musical stuff was childish IN A FUN WAY and I enjoyed myself thoroughly.

Now... I have some theories. First of all: something is off about our girl Ruby Sunday. Something is off with the universe, yes, but Ruby seems to have some powers of some kind. Her emotions and ideas of how things should be are affecting the world around her. Also. She doesn't feel... real. And that's where I can't tell if it's intentional or bad writing. I feel like I don't know anything about Ruby Sunday as a character. What is her personality? Her worries, flaws? Her relationship with her mother and grandmother feels very... artificial. Very nonspecific. In fact, a lot about Ruby feels artificial. Now, RTD of ye olde wrote from a very, VERY character driven standpoint (even if that meant sacrificing the integrity of the plot!) And made a point to show a lot about the companions' lives. RTD of now... I'm not so sure. The specials left me wanting to know more about Rose and Donna's lives that I feel like we didn't get. I at least definitely wanted more time with Rose and her day to day life. This is another case where I'm unsure if Ruby getting the same treatment is intentional or just poor writing again. I AM convinced, however, that Ruby is not a real person. I think she definitely has some relation to the gods, though I'm not quite sure she is one herself. After all, the maestro seemed very perturbed at her existence.

Here is a second thing I've noticed about Ruby. She is VERY similar to Rose. The phone, the space station, blonde, 4 letter name starts with R, the threat of a paradox outside a church. Ruby wants to see her mother, Rose wanted to see her dad. Not sure how much of it is RTD being an old dog with no new tricks and how much of it is intentional but it FEELS intentional.

Back to Ruby feeling not real, it almost feels like she's the perfect companion? Or at least an amalgamation of all the companions before her. She's also exactly what the doctor needs right now. He's grappling with being some sort of lost child with no parents and no home. Even though his home is destroyed, he now knows it was never his home in the first place. And here comes along Ruby, the child abandoned on the steps of a church on Christmas Eve. It almost seems like Ruby was made for the doctor at this moment in time. Was she created in his image? If, because of the salt at the edge of the universe, what we imagine becomes real, was Ruby imagined as a companion by the doctor? That doesn't necessarily mean she isn't real, but she may have been made real. Much to think about. I've even seen theories that Ruby is the same species as the doctor, but I'm not so sure about that.

One theory that does interest me is that the new season takes place in a TV show. It... well, it actually makes a lot of sense. The fourth wall breaks, the impromptu musical numbers, the fantasy element- there's a lot this season that lends itself to that. OH YEAH. And the sonic looks like a TV remote. Lol. Seeing as we just had an episode about a god that controls music, and we had an episode before that about a god that controls games, I wouldn't be surprised to find out that there's a god of TV that is fucking with reality.

Overall, I'm just really curious to see how this will all be resolved. Is Ruby somehow created by the imagination of the doctor? Or was she created by the pantheon just to fuck with him? If she really isn't real, how will that be resolved when they inevitably solve the fantasy leaking into reality salt at the edge of the universe deal? Will she go away with it? Or has she cemented her place in reality? Lots of questions to be had. I have one million more thoughts I'm sure I'll think of later, but I'm gonna stop this here for now. I'm really curious to see more people's theories...

[sushisocks]

Do you have any Sean x Lenny headcanons? I’m so desperate for more of their content, lol.

DO I HAVE SEAN X LENNY HEADCANONS?!??! Dear anon I could talk about macsummers FOREVEEERRRR!!!! We are truly STARVED for content about them but yes yes let me share some THOUGHTS I have lolol (sorry for the late reply, this week has been kicking my ass aklsdjf)

Okay see I think MacSummers have such good potential to be real 'one fell first, the other fell harder', in that sense of the second person falling suddenly having to catch up on all the feelings, yknow? And it works EITHER way, which I LOVE abt them, so let's talk about what their crushes would look like njbhnjbhmk

Lenny's first to fall:

Lenny ABSOLUTELY has a crush foreveeerrr, pining HARD because he can't bring himself to make a move. Half of that is also reckoning with the fact that he HAS a crush, and on Sean of all people.

Sean is an oblivious idiot; a bi king so busy with the thrill of the chase he doesn't realize what's right in front of him at first, and also, in his mind the possibility of Lenny being interested in him is so small it barely connects.

It's a mess; people DEFINITELY start noticing - it's Lenny's first time having feelings as intense as these about someone and he is NOT as subtle as he'd like to believe he is.

Truly painful for anyone to witness; no, Lenny, that joke was not that funny, stop staring wistfully across the camp like that, everyone knows you're just sitting at the campfire because Sean is there, your book is upside down.

The girls swing back and forth between gently teasing him about it or trying to cheer him up after witnessing some horrendous attempt at flirting from Sean with one of them - they're all rolling their eyes at him for it.

Jenny is def the one who notices first, and the one Lenny goes to for advice. She does NOT give him good advice. Thankfully Lenny is smart enough to realize as much when she tells him to take Sean fishing during a moonlit night, like that's 1) romantic in any sense of the word or 2) something normal for them to do.

Hosea also catches on but it just makes him more grumpy when dealing with Sean, very fatherly 'youre not good enough for my child' vibes off him. Sean still has 0 clue, but now sometimes he catches Hosea giving him the deathstare, and there's a high chance that every time Hosea sees Sean even look in Lenny's direction, he's considering pulling his gun on him.

Tilly is the most sympathetic to Lenny out of the whole lot, when she's not laughing at him. Tbf they're all laughing at him.

The 'Let me teach you how to read!' thing is very much an excuse just to hang out with Sean more. Mind you Lenny is very serious in his effort to teach Sean, he definitely thinks Sean deserves someone making the effort for him, but he's very internally giddy about 'hihi spending time with crush!!' And he probably does have to go debrief with Jenny and Tilly about it.

He only FINALLY gets the nerve to make a move at the end of a long night of drinking. Liquid courage has Lenny grabbing a loud and laughing Sean by the wrist after he says or does something that makes Lenny want to vomit his heart out, dragging Sean out of camp past the treeline, and kissing him square on the mouth, if only for his sanity. Sean, once the shock passes, goes, verbatim "oh. OH! well, ya couldve told me earlier!" before proceeding to snog Lenny senseless <3

Sean's first to fall:

It takes a minute for Sean to actually realize he has a crush, but then Lenny looks at him in a certain way, smiling and gazing at him with those shrewd eyes of his, shining in the light of the campfire, and Sean feels like he's been struck by fucking lightning.

Who has eyes like that anyway?? Sean will not be able to stop thinking about them, ever, now.

He's upping the ante on silly goofy behavior by 11, just to make Lenny smile. Even better if he laughs!!

He agrees to be tutored in reading just to spend time with Lenny and promptly spends all that time vacillating between doing his utmost to distract Lenny away from the lesson with jokes or trying very hard to listen to him just to get lost in his eyes. Lenny doesn't really mind but they get nothing done.

Sean has a fucking army on his ass in seconds; Arthur, John, Tilly, Mary-Beth, and Karen all seem to know out of NOWHERE and Sean has to sit through a fucking impromptu roast while wondering if all his closest friends are fucking mind-readers.

It's funny to them all at first but there IS some sympathy for poor Sean. Doesn't stop them from teasing him mercilessly.

Those that know him, know he's fucked when he switches the 'I love ya!' to 'Ya love me!' with Lenny. It's harder to say to the people he has actual persistent non-platonic feelings for, and almost self-soothing to instead say the reverse as a substitute.

Thing is; if Lenny having a crush is unsubtle, Sean is a fucking bull in a china-shop by comparison. Lenny sure as hell has his suspicions from very early on.

IT DOESN'T HELP THAT WHEN SEAN GETS DRUNK HE'S FLIRTING WITH LENNY IN THE EXACT SAME WAY HE DOES WITH THE GIRLS.

Lenny is very good-humored about the whole thing but it comparatively to when Lenny's the one with the crush, it sure as hell doesn't take very long from Sean realizing his crush to Lenny also realizing Sean's crush.

It helps Lenny getting over his own nerves, if nothing else.

Everyone in camp knows by the time Lenny decides to end Sean's suffering. They walk down to the river near camp, find a spot which is a bit more secluded, and Lenny very gently cups Sean's face, tells him to stop him if he doesn't want this, and kisses him. Sean is grinning like the cat who got the cream afterwards, and Lenny v fondly calls him a fool.

There's like several relieved sighs when they return to camp holding hands. Like Sean isn't gonna be way more of a menace WITH a boyfriend than he is without.

Here's some general headcanons too, bcz I LOVE thinking and talking abt this ship lmfaoo

They're both very talkative - very much the types to stay up all night talking, discussing their thoughts and feelings, camp gossip, their childhoods, the most fucked up death they saw besides their dads', their favorite colors, etc etc. They've had SEVERAL items thrown at them for waking up their fellow gangmembers in the dead of night.

Lenny reads as very acts of service-y to me. Throwing a blanket over Sean when he's knocked out, bringing him food or snacks when he's on guard shift, teaching him how to read, etc etc.

Meanwhile Sean is very touchy; he likes the reassurance of Lenny's physical presence, and it can be as small as just feeling the press of their thighs while sitting next to each other, but they're not exactly strangers to other things like hugging or holding hands.

In that vein it's not uncommon to find Lenny like, doing his own thing, reading or writing, with Sean amusing himself by tracing the lines in Lenny's free hand, or dozing against his back or something.

They have that honeymoon period where you can't find one without the other and they're hard to separate for anything. Sean complains if they're set to different tasks during a job. They manage to be regular about it eventually, but there's an acclimation period for both them and everyone surrounding them -- baby's first proper relationship, y'know?

They're still prone to joining each other on their guard shifts though, even if just for a little while.

You know that comic that's like "I'm gonna kiss you stupid" "But I'm already so dumb!" "Youre gonna be such an idiot when I'm through with you" That Is Very Them imo lolol

Aaaannddd this is already so long I think I'll stop now before we're here all night kmjnhbjnbh

[mirandaputsherbestbuttforward]

copy/pasting this from my rp blog since I’m gonna delete it there later but

yknow, as i’ve gotten older and realized some things, it’s tough to be a lesbian in fandom spaces. (this is mostly spurred on by recent lore in apex but it applies to the bio.ware fandoms too).

so like, apex has built up a relationship between bangalore and loba that’s essentially rivals to possible lovers over the course of 4 whole seasons in game. I know it’s a BR but they are adding lore and how all these stories are intertwined. anyway, tl;dr it now seems like they’re throwing in a love triangle arc with valkyrie/loba for some reason and it’s like... yknow i’m glad valk is the first lesbian character, but also like bangalore is distinctly coded as a masculine / stud lesbian and for once i’d like to see good masc/stud/butch representation bc we get called “stereotypical” and thus so many wlw end up being super feminine or just “tomboy-ish” but never fully in the realm of masculine lesbians.

so like, ever notice how in bio.ware, all the wlw romances are... with feminine women? And the one woman who is more masculine in appearance wound up being a het romance because they wanted to ‘subvert stereotypes’? and i mean Sera has a lot of issues in the writing (given that her writer was a straight man lol) and the treatment of her character is kinda garbage too bc you can be so rude to her as inq and for what reason??

anyway this also applies to Sam bc as much as I do LOVE her romance and Alix’s voice acting (espec since Alix literally has two mums herself), the weird obsession with the shower and later the hot tub in the citadel dlc is absolutely catered to the het male gamer playing as fshep who fetishizes women. It’s sad, but this is what happens with a lot of men writing wlw romances. they just don’t get it.

and also, playing a lesbian fshep? Don’t get me wrong, I adore Liara, but it is clear that a) she was intended to be the Main romance with the amount of content she gets and b) that it was definitely made with mshep in mind first as the entire series truly was so there’s nothing distinctly unique about it if you romance her as fshep. (which tbh there are things that are gendered specific to fshep in the game, so it would’ve made sense e.g. eve and fshep bonding over being women; anderson saying she’d make a good mom, that kind of thing). and same goes for Kelly’s “romance” (we love kelly here, don’t insult her pls) was v much made for a male gaze.

and so these attitudes, in my experience, are often reflected in fandom spaces (which includes the rpc but this isn’t a vague at anyone, it’s just a general Vibe that I’ve gotten over the years) wherein people who aren’t into the big main straight romances (sorry garrus kaidan and thane) aren’t like,,, acknowledged as much? Like, there’s already enough hate for ash and miranda as is, but being a sapphic person who loves them in the gay way? it’s tough because your content isn’t as widely accepted as others, be it art/writing/rp, yknow?

anyway this is me just rambling as i’m finally feeling a bit better but i’m glad for y’all that stick around and support my Brand™ because sometimes i’m made to feel :/// about my presence as a lesbian in fandom, yknow?

[lemonlurkrr]

@aureateart​ ok. My favourite parts of twilight princess  (and some other random thoughts about TP sprinkled in there) taken from my monster TP word vomit google doc :

Link lmao

Ok but for real, I like this incarnation of Link :)

I love Ordon (it just seems like such a chill and cozy village)

ALSO love how easy it is to interpret Link as being a sort of older brother figure to the Ordon kiddos. It’s just,, super cute? AND GHHH nice nice good thanks nintendo for giving me characters to care about/characters that I can imagine Link caring about

He didn’t sign up for any of this (tbh, none of the Links really signed up for this jshdjsd). But I mean like, dude was just going to take a trip to castle town, drop a gift off for the royal family, and come back. But haHA oopsies he did get to castle town eventually but definitely not the way he expected hsjdhsd

He’s just a little dude?

AND FUCK. HE REALLY HAD NEVER BEEN OUTSIDE OF ORDON UNTIL ALL OF THAT

everything is new for the player AND Link

Midna

She’s cool :)

she really just

*teleports into your jail cell* hello whore.

I am no master at writing but AYYYY she do got a character arc!!!

She was actually pretty helpful sometimes, I ALWAYS checked in with her before turning to a game guide

Other NPCs

NICE

Love all of the TP character designs (ASHEI’S ARMOUR??? AOWOAOAOOAO)

Saving Zelda and all of Hyrule was important yea but thinking back maybe it was more like, the Ordonians and the kids were what was pushing Link to keep on going

I like the Resistance members :) Very video gamey of them to have one NPC assigned to each dungeon but hey!!! Kinda cool getting to see a little glimpse of each of em

Idk, it’s just fun to imagine Link popping into Telma’s bar after each dungeon and taking a little rest :) (or to celebrate? maybe just chat, idk, give this man some downtime!!)

Honestly it was just kind of nice that Link wasn’t entirely alone. I mean, I know Midna was there the whole time, but I am always for giving Link a big group of friends (see my love for hyrule warriors, age of calamity, and LU LMAO)

Hero’s shade, very very cool, kinda sad he died with regrets but HEY. He got to pass on his knowledge eventually

AND the connection to OoT?? AND assumed to be related by blood too????? GOOD SHIT

Ilia, I REALLY really wanted to like her (er, it’s not like I dislike her, she’s just,,, kinda there for me).

It definitely seems like Nintendo was pushing to make her the romantic interest, but GHHHHH they really threw that out of the window for me by having her lose her memories

I saw a text post a while ago that said it would have been interesting if Ilia was Link’s sister instead and YES!! That would have been cool too :0

Wish we got to know Zelda a little more

I feel like we barely know anything about her

Idk man, like I said earlier, I never really had any sort of drive to save Zelda during my playthroughs

She obviously knows Midna, so maybe if they gave us just a little bit more of that relationship I’d be more interested in her?

TP WORLD BUILDINGGGG

Botw has good world building too, but each race felt kinda,,, isolated? I absolutely love the different architecture and vibe each town has (and all the the weapons too) but ghhh yea everyone felt so separated. As far as I can remember, we don’t see tooo much of the races interacting with each other? Now that I’m typing that out maybe that’s to be expected because of the calamity but KLSJDKJFD ANYWAYS THIS IS ABOUT TP

The world feels nice and alive, love how populated everything is

Castle town I like castle town a lot, it feels dense and busy and I really like how you can’t talk to every NPC you see

Very cool very fun that we got to see the Gorons hanging out in multiple spots

kinda wish we got to see the Zoras a little more (I guess they are a bit limited since they need water but GHHHH the tp zoras are so prebby,,)

BUT HEY, I do remember seeing a zora or two hanging out in the hot springs around death mountain after beating the lakebed temple (I think, might have been a different dungeon) 

but aaaa would have been nice to see them in at least a couple of other places. I think it would have really added to the “congrats Link!! You’re restoring peace to Hyrule” feeling you get from seeing the Gorons hanging out in Kakariko and Castle Town

ORDON

Love how chill it is and how it’s kind of separate from Hyrule proper

They really do seem to be doing their own thing apart from the rest of Hyrule

Just kinda adds onto the “he’s just a regular dude minding his own business” kind of vibes I get from TP Link

Also I like Ordona :)

THE LIGHT SPIRITS,,

Love their design

And love how they’re not exactly like a pure white?

Different spirit representing each aspect of the triforce my beloved

But yes hi I think Ordona is very cool

Who are you, how did you get here, which goddess do you represent? Do you even represent one of the three golden goddesses? Do the Ordonians know about you? Have any of them ever SEEN you??? Do they worship you? Does anybody even know about the existence of the light spirits?? FUCK so many questions but ghhh I like how they broke the status quo a bit by throwing in a fourth spirit :)

I feel like this one is kinda weird but I like that voice sample they used in the light spirit music. It’s spooky and pretty at the same time :)  

cutscenes mmmmm

Ok ok, the spooky lanayru cutscene is very good

BUT THE “Link, Chosen Hero! Lend us the last of your power!” CUTSCENE MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM LOVE IT SO MUCH

IT just

Idk man

It just hit different

I like the music

And seeing the light spirits swimming around in the light juice water whatever it is

Summoning the light arrows?

AND HHHHH “Lend us the last of your power!” THIS IS IT. This is the final battle.

Seeing Zelda bow down, and then Link putting his hand out 👌👌👌

Link: ok bud, let’s do this together :)

Connection to OoT (did I already mention this? Maybe., Whatever)

Very cool nintendo :)

I love seeing connections between all the diff zelda games.

Because like, on one hand, they’re all separate from each other because of yknow, individual hero stuff. BUT ALSO, they’re all connected because of the reincarnation stuff

Grrrr walking through the sacred grove and going “The Hero of Time walked around here a long time ago” FUCK THATS SO COOL

Is the Hero’s Shade watching me? What does he think of me? DIsappointed? Proud? The Hero of Time went through HELL so this timeline didn’t have to deal with any of the shit Ganon was gonna pull with the triforce, better not fuck this UP Link!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Midlink is cute

Kinda hurts that she smashed the mirror but that was probably so Nintendo didn’t have to worry about people going “but what about the twili??????” for any of the other games LMAO

BUT ALSO LIKE SKJDKLJFJ There are some pretty massive plot holes in TP anyway so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ whatever it’s fine we’ll just use this for angst because GOD do y’all like angst

So is Shadlink

Honestly don’t know where this ship came from but it’s cute so whatever

THE MUSIC??

Love Midna’s theme and how they referenced the dark world theme from ALttP (I remember trying to learn the dark world theme on the piano and doing the Leonardo DiCaprio point meme at the little jingle I recognized from Midna’s theme)

Hyrule field theme SLAPS.

Apparently references a couple of the other over-world themes from the previous zelda games (I got this from 8-bit Music theory’s video on the over-world zelda themes, he talks about TP at around 11:40 but def recommend watching the whole video if you’re into music analysis stuff)

So there’s this bit of the Hyrule Field theme, I don’t know the official name for it but I remember seeing somewhere it being called the “at an advantage theme” since yeah, you hear it during the boss music whenever you expose their weak points. FUCKINGGG LOVE THAT. Didn’t notice it during my first playthrough, but hearing it during my second was like a little easter egg for my ears every time :)

Midna’s lament is very pretty (and fun to play on the piano)

COURAGE THEME.

I didn’t care for it too much when I started playing the game but hearing it in ZREO’s arrangement of the Hyrule Field theme literally makes me turn into a puddle of emotions. Also hearing it around and of the Ordon kids (I think it plays after Link saves Colin) AAAAAAAAAAAAA

Orchestra piece #1 and #2 HOLY SHIT???????????????? 

Literally, the first time I listened to those I just,,,, plugged in my headphones, volume 100, layed on the floor/against my desk and silently vibed. I don’t know what the hell it is, but those two just fit so well with TP?? I still avoid listening to them nowadays cause if I DO I definitely will get overwhelmed with the “god I love this game so FUCKING MUCH” kind of feels.

Wolf link sucks at singing

the first time I heard him howling Zelda’s Lullaby I lost my shit because LKSJLDKSGLKJFSKG god that was.,, Bad. Anyways, hearing him howl some of the songs from OoT was cute :)

TP STAFF ROLL??? 

VERY GOOD. IT’s like 10 minutes long and GOD do I love every single second of it. It doesn’t have the same energy as the skyward sword staff roll or the orchestra pieces but GOD does it hit good??

Nice and calm after that big exciting adventure. Maybe it would have been more fun or emotional to have a higher energy piece but it was really nice getting to sit back and watch the camera fly around Hyrule. Seeing like, the Gorons and the Zoras having a good time, the kids returning to Ordon? GOOD SHIT.

and AAAAA that end, when you hear the main Zelda theme and see Link riding off out of Faron woods on Epona… good shit. It gets you thinking, where the hell is he going? What is he doing? Off ot do more adventuring? Going to help out the resistance or something? Going to help Zelda? Or maybe he’s trying to figure out a way to restore the mirror of twilight? Whoooo knows.

hhHHHHhhh it’s just that final reminder that YES!!! YOU JUST PLAYED A ZELDA GAME. JUST ANOTHER STORY APART OF THE WHOLE EPIC OF THE ZELDA SERIES AS A WHOLE

I also want to acknowledge the instrument/samples they used for all the twili stuff.

They’re all just so unique and contrast SO well with the rest of the TP OST. LIKE FUCK!! Anytime I hear the screech from the Twilit Kargarok? Sends a shiver down my spine. I associate those sounds SO strongly with the twili realm. (Like, the same way you associate the BSHEWW VVWWMMM sounds with light sabers)

I love it so god damn much

literally any time there’s a certain sound or motif associated with something I lose my shit

Sacred grove sacred grove sacred gro-

lovely lovely lovely so much fun playing that on the piano. AND again, I did the Leonardo DiCaprio pointing meme when I heard the theme from the lost woods come in GHHHHHHHH

shoutout to TP Faron Woods for helping me study and get through all of my schoolwork

BLEGUUHHH can you tell that I really love music?

and also yea I guess TP is kinda cool too :\

IF YOU READ ALL OF THAT THANKS I GUESS

[faye-circle]

Hey worstie! The original post I made inspired me to check my ex’s account (that’s the person this post is directed at, hi!!!) to see if she was keeping up with my account. You made a post complaining about how I was “gross”. It is of course your prerogative to think of me how you will, but I do remember you cleaning your room on multiple occasions WHILE I was over at your house, plus your bathroom was usually a total mess.

Anyways, when I made the second part of this post, you once again made some word-vomit post about how much you hate your ex. I have wonderful news, the feeling is completely mutual <3. You said you didn’t feel safe being honest with me, which is pretty funny, considering I did make it pretty clear that I wanted you to tell me if I ever made you uncomfortable, and I never did anything to make you feel otherwise. Trust me, after you dumped me just before Valentine’s day after conveniently having something to do every time I wanted to come over, I spent a few months examining all that had happened, and wondering what I did.

Meanwhile of course, you were talking mad shit on a Tumblr account about me. A tumblr account which you yourself said you didn’t realize I had unfollowed from. Unless of course you lied straight to my face, which you obviously aren’t afraid to do. We’ll get to that later! Funny how I went from someone was a “very important person to me” and who “meant a lot to me” (quoted directly from the text you sent over Discord to break up with me, which said nothing about the apparently dozens of other red flags I was waving.) to “someone I used to know”. Somebody moved on fast!

Oh wait, you didn’t :D. You still talked to me, albeit sparsely, and you and your friends and I were all in a group chat. A few, actually. Several of them ended along the lines of someone bullying me and then everyone leaving the chat. How about we go through one of them, hm?

Unfortunately I left this group, so I don’t have screenshots of the full conversation, but effectively it went like this. (P.S. for context, your friend had earlier said “I don’t misuse tone tags”, but I had forgotten because my ADHD affects my memory.)

Your friend, we’ll call them Prose, referring to language in its “ordinary” form, without structure. God knows you were all a mess, so I found it fitting.

You and your little gang of public highschool plastics (including Prose) invited me into a group. In this group, we were spamming some stupid memes at each other. I was sending that one dancing skeleton meme. Then Prose jumps in…

Prose: Faye, if you send that one more time, I’m going to make you cry /srs.

Me: *insert meme*

Prose: you ready?

(Names are blacked out for privacy.)

After this, everyone left this discord group. Rather than you, the person whom I thought I could trust to yknow, maybe NOT let their regina george wannabe friend just straight up fucking bully me, you simply glossed over it. You also let your friend text me on your phone, as well as you were apparently joking around with an edit which resulted in this after I asked you to not let them text me with your phone:

(This photo had been previously edited to show a friend, hence the red, I’ll probably edit this post later and post a cleaner version. Anything for you, after all, you’re an absolute SAINT right?)

Now isn’t that neat.

Now, moving on through the fun we’ve had, this was of course not the ONLY way you were a complete and utter disgrace to your ancestors. You and your friends also posted in a discord server with the /confession bot that at least one of you thinks dicks are disgusting. I’m glad you’re not afraid to express your opinions, as long as there’s no consequence for it anywhere ever, however you all knew that I am both AMAB and Nonbinary, which even if you don’t KNOW that I have dysphoria, you could at least assume it was likely. It was incredibly public, but I didn’t say anything because y’all have the right to say what you want in your own server (which I’m sure you guys are going absolutely NUTS in rn over this, whether it be laughter, confusion, lividness, etc.)

I still haven’t hit the character limit, but I’ll speed this up a bit. blah blah blah things of similar caliber, you guys being total dickheads, yada yada yada. At one point, you talked about how I apparently forced you into using a name for a year, despite the fact that I stopped using it as soon as you asked and I never heard a peep otherwise. You also talked about how you repeatedly told me you hated it when people specifically only called you one pronoun and how I wasn’t respecting that. Knock knock! It’s time to take down more of your bullshit! Isn’t this a fun game?

Now, given that it’s been almost a year since then, I’ve actually gotten better at referring to people with different pronouns. Funny enough I don’t really use pronouns for you, I usually just call you a whiny manipulative piss-baby who complains on her tumblr account to get a reaction from her ex who has EXcommunicated him from their life! See? Much better <3.

Consider this your reaction. You know I really don’t know why you’re kicking the hornet’s nest here, I’ve known you for nigh on 9 years now if I’m counting correctly. That’s more than half our lifetimes. I know you. I know that I’m the one who you came to during the pandemic, when everything was hell. I know that when you got bored of whatever new friends you’ve picked up at [insert school here], I was the one you came back to. I know that you mostly ignored me for years on end in between those times. You ever think about that? You should.

Reminder here that you broke up with me, and you’re still here, reading this post, because you’re stalking my page. Or maybe it’s Prose stalking my page, I’m not sure. If so, hi Prose! I hate you too, don’t worry, this post is just about my ex. You’re not really worth a separate post.

After you dumped me and treated me like shit and internet-stalked me like I dumped you and you simply couldn’t have that, my friends picked me up. My friends who actually wanted me around, unlike you. I’ve been doing much better since. I went through a lot of emotional growth. Eventually I blocked you because of this ask in particular:

This ask has since been deleted from my inbox. You basically just called me a background character who lives away from the story until you and your team of 15 year olds going on 5 year olds need me to do something for you, and is only there to react to the main characters. It’s fine to think you’re a main character as long as it doesn’t go to your head, but I think that I deserve a little more than “background character.” I hope this post secures a little more than that, how about “the person whose tumblr account I don’t go to anymore”?

I’m writing on my phone so my fingers are hurting a bit, but I think I’ve sufficiently dragged you through the mud, no? Given I know you guys are prone to open mockery without recourse, I understand that this may not accomplish much, but I just wanted to make it ever so clear that you are not, and will never be, welcome ANYWHERE near me ever again, so you can stop stalking my blog. I’m not crying over you. I hope after this post you take a good look at yourself in the mirror and think about how you got your childhood friend from second grade, who endured bullying and harassment simply because they wanted your fickle approval, has become this annoyed with your childish behavior.

Please come up with a better insult than “gross” or “Terrible person” by the way, I know you’ve got at least one braincell. Oh wait, I took it. Nevermind!

(P.S. you might be wondering why this was posted publicly for all to see, and the reason is that I have my ex blocked on everything. If they want to see this post, they have to intentionally log out of their account to see it. How pathetic is that? That’s pretty sad. I’d almost consider it self-detrimental behavior since it only seems to bring negative emotions. This has actually been quite therapeutic for me.)

Today I learned that deleting a contact also means it deletes the block on said contact. I found this out because my shitty ex texted me a drawn picture of a ripped Lorax. Reminder that this mf broke up with ME and assumedly she’s STILL trying to get a reaction out of me??? Like. Girl… this is just sad to watch

[blogtwoblah]

01/13/18 11:29pm

hey so this is word vomit #1

cant promise it’s a positive one for many reasons

school anxiety, kpop, and death mention (not me or anyone i know, but if you know kpop or have twitter you probably know who i mention in this)

first thing’s first, i feel like total fucking shit

i’m in my last year of high school, last few weeks of the first semester, and im failing 2 classes. literally at this rate i wont be able to graduate. so naturally, im stressed. but when i get stressed and i try to express my frustrations to my mother, she just gets frustrated as well and starts yelling at me and like wow ! do you realize you are not making this any easier? and so my dad comes in and starts yelling at me too and im like damn! this is really not what i need right now! 

anyway! im working on this essay right, and im getting pretty overwhelmed so i decide to take a break and watch youtube. and who better to cheer me up then amber liu right? she’s great and i really need her kind of vibe rn. i havent watched many of her videos, but i definitely know who she is in the kpop industry and as an individual yknow but i digress. so i clicked on a vid, had a laugh, let autoplay run a bit. im about four videos in and she’s filming kind of a behind the scenes thing from back when she was on that buzzfeed vid and i was like yeah okay cool. then she was at kcon and i was like oh hey cool! but soon i wasnt feelin cool anymore because then she was being goofy with minho from shinee. my stomach DROPPED and not even ten seconds later, jonghyun came into frame and im not gunna lie i immediately burst into tears. usually i can watch funny kpop vine compilations with him in it and smile, listen to shinee or his solo songs while getting ready in the morning, or just think of him with an ache in my heart and that’s about it. i am coping better than some others and yknow thats okay, sometimes people need to take their time with things like this, but i was numb for a week and decided that i had to try to overcome this and be happy again, cuz thats what jonghyun wouldve wanted.

but this time, sitting here with my laptop burning on my lap, already worked up from my stresses of earlier today, i really couldnt deal with seeing him or hearing his voice knowing he’s gone. i cant even open the tab to change the video because he’s just.... right there.. smiling and having fun with his friends... and this might be cheesy and cringy but.. just knowing that he’s gone and he’s never coming back, and the thought that moments like this will never happen again, makes me not want to take life for granted and to give it my all and try to succeed or whatever.

but i know that wont happen cuz im a piece of shit that has a chance of not graduating high school and im writing this word vomit instead of writing an essay that is already late.