#anyway sword art fucking sucks

[kideternity]

[Image ID: A digital inked drawing of Digimon character TigerVespamon. They are a wasp themed humanoid robot, with a round head with large bug like eyes, a pointed bug like mouth, and pointed V shaped horns protruding from their forehead. They are wearing a ragged scarf. They have large shoulder pads, a triangular chest, small waist, and pointed thorax with a stinger attached. They have four skinny wings in the back and segmented limbs, with sharp pointed feet, panels protruding from each thigh and front of the calf, and long pipes coming from their upper arms. Throughout the design there are many areas such as the neck, underarms and lower legs that expose mechanical features, such as sockets and more pipes. They are in a three quarters action pose, holding two large swords, their right leg bent in on itself behind whilst the left leg is fully displayed. One sword is held above their head, and the other is held just above the left leg. Both are pointed towards the viewer. /End Image ID]

Buzz buzz

[graciousred]

Happy

Release Date

Sword Art Online

November 6th, 2022

[just-prime]

Ahsoka is so slow I could cry. She was trained by Anakin and presumably Obi-wan and several other Jedi, and Rosario can hardly do an actual lightsaber twirl, let alone make me believe she could survive Ventress, Maul, Grievous, or Vader, survive order 66, or run in a way that looks fast. Bo-Katan moves faster, Shin moves faster, Sabine moves faster, Ezra moves faster, even Ewan's lazy twirls while walking around and not actively engaged in battle in the prequels were roughly as fast as Rosario's in an actual duel.

It's also canon that in this era, in a less prequels flashy version of standard Jedi abilities, a Jedi can leap SEVERAL feet. Luke in ROTJ- even GROGU can jump higher, while Rosario's feet are consistently glued to the ground. Her choreography and speed are so inconsistent with this established era and people keep writing it off and praising it as her fighting like a samurai now, even though it makes NO sense for her to, given who trained her. She isn't A New Hope Obi-wan, nor sad cave dwelling Obi-wan who hasn't stretched or lifted a weapon in a decade, and a 44 year old Jedi is still supposed to be in their prime.

I truly wonder if part of it is that they can't keep her lekku on properly if she does a flip, and they are shorter because they were meant to be more practical, but I'm really not seeing a character agile enough to need stunt modified lekku.

If they couldn't bring this to life in live action convincingly, it should have remained animated and each passing week demonstrates this more and more.

I'm sorry to anon into your inbox like this, but your post about the last episode has been so refreshing, and I've felt like I've been watching a completely different show than other people and don't know how they considered any of the actors ready. (Rosario has said she was training during filming). Thank you for your brutally honest take, you're spot on on all counts.

Couple of things.

A) I agree with everything you just said. Always feel free to come and rant into my asks.

B) I HAVE BEEN ANTI TINY LEKKU SINCE MANDO S2. It's laughable that we've seen cosplayers with more Rebels accurate headpieces. And of course everyone defends it with the 'it wouldn't be fair to the stunt person to have them try and do flips in that' and it's like NEWSFLASH Ahsoka isn't doing flips anyway!!! And sure, they probably stuck Rosario in a 5 week sword training class, but she's clearly not had to do any serious combat training given how clunky her fights are. And again, this was also a problem back in Mando s2, only she was in the middle of a foggy woods, so it was easier to hide the fact that she is incompetent when it comes to fight choreography.

C) "If they couldn't bring this to life in live action convincingly, it should have remained animated" Exactly. This is why every passing day I am increasingly pissed that this show killed and ate the animated Rebels sequel series that was in fucking development. Everything about this show, from Ahsoka, to Hera (hell, even TBoBF cameos like Cad Banes) prove that Disney is not willing to shell out for a decent makeup and/or CG designer. No shade to the artists that are currently working on it, they are doing their jobs to the best of their abilities. What I mean is they didn't have anyone on set that was in a high enough positions to say 'Hey, have any of you heard of contouring?' Like, just looking at the alien makeup of the OT...which somehow holds up better than state of the art Disney budget makeup. It's just fucking embarrassing at this point. There is no reason everyone should look as flat as they do, but it's no surprise that they do when mary elizabeth winstead is celebrating that her makeup only took an hour. Sure, it's understandable that you don't want to be sitting in the makeup chair every morning of hours on end, but in the end you are an actor who signed up to play an alien...Suck it up buttercup.

D) I totally understand how hard it is to be not liking this show right now. The amount of people who've told me that "well, clearly it's just not made for you" after I point out a simple fact that a character is out of character is painful. Looking at twitter after each episode as everyone seems to think Filoni is creating the second coming is painful. Because it really does feel like we're watching a different show than them.

Okay, I think I covered everything. Thank you again for your kind words and your wonderful rant!!!

[sanjisblackasswife]

Hello! I don't know if your request is open or not, sorry if I send this request when your request is close. May I request separate headcanons for monster trio x fem reader? Reader wears clothes that can hide her ass because she's uncomfortable when someone stares at her ass (and she dislikes her ass because it's too big). Sfw or nsfw is up to you. Is my request alright and fine for you? Do tell me if you feel like it's too much, thank you!

A/N: This stupid ass draft didn’t save and I already wrote sm so I apologize for the late response I was so mad SKSHSHSKSK anyways I’ll always put on my head when my request are closed so you’re good babes your request was perfect thank u!. But I did do a similar HC of this but it was pretty OOC and spicy so I’ll make this one more tame and sfw ;) tysm for requesting!

Monster Trio’s Girlfriend Insecure About Her Big Butt (FLUFF)

Black Fem Reader in Mind

Ft. Zoro, Luffy, & Sanji

No warnings! Just fluff and stupidity.

————————————————————————————————————————

Zoro

As if this MF gives af

Look at him. And imma say it again:

Booty Hunter Zoro is canon. I will not have y’all disagree w me on this idc what y’all say

Anyways he doesn’t really care what you wear so he never had a reason to question why you mostly wore baggy clothes. He assumed since you’re the martial arts fighter of the crew it gives you more leeway?

Today you and him went to go fishing in a small town and it was a bit hot so you wore a long dress with a jacket over your waist. Just for extra precaution.

“Got damn…” you heard a few guys whistle from behind you which made you hold onto Zoro’s arm as he scratched his ear yawning not even paying attention to any of the men cat calling you and making derogatory comments about your shape.

“Fuck that’s a sweet piece of ass he got—hey sweetheart how bout you dip that asshole and come have fun with us?”

Zoro usually doesn’t engage with people that holler out to you both. You and him both know Zoro will protect you so he tells you not to worry about the stupid comments. He just doesn’t give a fuck until they decide to get bold enough to get close

And that was the first mistake

“Hey!” The man’s hand didn’t even get to touch your shoulder before Zoro pulled out his sword and cut the man.

The rest of his crew behind him looked terrified and many of them whispered “Oh that’s the pirate hunter Zoro! How didn’t he know he was with that chick?!”

Zoro grabbed the man’s collar with full force and looked him then his crew in the eye

“Its already annoying as hell hearing you asses yell out to my woman without attacking all of you, but Just know next time I see any of your shitty dirty hands on her I’ll cut them off of you. It would suck to not have your only girlfriend to use when you’re alone at night wouldnt it?”

Just in case nobody understands the last prt Zoro is implying the man uses his hand to jack off

Zoro pushed the man back down and continued walking as he stole a bottle of sake from their group in passing.

“Common unless you want me to kick all their asses for you.”

First off it turned you on a bit hearing him call you “my woman” it was so out of character for him

You scurried to him and he held his hand out sipping his their drink and you grabbed it

“I hate I always cause this.”

Zoro didn’t know what the hell you were talking about but when he asked and you explained your issues with your butt and how you don’t like it he rolls his eyes.

Lowkey offended you but that’s how Zoro is.

“You shouldn’t be insecure about that. It’s stupid. Your body is ..very attractive and those idiots probably never seen a woman’s body besides on a magazine in years.”

“Any jackass that want to make you feel bad about having a sexy ass like yours can talk to me about it because they’re not the one that gets to grab it now are they?”

He was so shameless in his words.

“Zoro…”

You smile, your boyfriend can be a numbskull but his heart is always in the right place. So you take off your jacket and without a slip of the beat you get Zoro smack your butt.

“See? You really do have a great ass.”

“Stop it!”

He laughs and kisses your forehead because he still loves his overthinking girlfriend sm.

Sanji

This man is a true chad. A gentleman. A MAN ABOVE MEN—-

So he clearly notices when his Princess feels even a little bit down

He had a feeling by the way you looked at your body in the mirror there was something you didn’t like about yourself

He noticed how you never wore a bikini, or shorts, or even a flowy dress on hot days.

Sanji has asked you what’s the issue, but you brushed it off and told him not to worry about it

But Sanji being Sanji he couldn’t let that slide no no

There was a beach party celebration happening by the dock and a bunch of people in and out of town were there. You really loved swimming actually and Sanji wanted to go and play in the water with you but you were stuck in your room

“Y/N-SSAAAAAAANNNNN COMMON!”

Robin and Nami got you a two piece to wear, they said they didn’t want to see you outside until you wore it and that in turn made you nearly regret confining to them about your insecurity but you knew it was just the typical tough love they gave you.

You let Sanji in and he was already in his swim trunks ready to go but you were still wearing a sweats and hoodie

“Baby why aren’t you ready? You sick? Need me to make you some soup?”

He does NOT let go of the subject if you try to brush him off this time he has been seeing you act like this for too long

So you finally explain to him

After you let him know your dilemma with your big butt he’s ready to kick Zoro

He didn’t even have anything to do with it he just wanna kick his ass

“WHO SAID DISGUSTING THINGS TO YOU AND YOUR BODY? HM? I WILL KILL THEM—��

He began screaming and flames came out of no where so you had to smack him

“No! I Just…for a Long time guys always made fun of my butt and if they didn’t make fun of it they made sexual comments and I hated it and I—- there is just so many people out there—“

Sanji understands your issue but rest assured he reminds you why you shouldn’t. He tells you how he will hurt anybody that tries it and even bring a towel and a big shirt to cover you if you need it. You show him the blue bikini you were ganna wear and Sanji just forgets his sweet speech and spazzes the hell out

“OH PLEASE MY DEAREST BLESS MY EYES TO SEE YOUR PERFECT BREAST AND PERFECT BUTT! I WILL WORSHIP YOU PLEASE—-“

He was holding onto your legs crying.

Anyways you kick him out your room and put it on.

You have to admit you looked delicious you really did.

Tits were great, legs were amazing, and dat ass was so fluffy like a pancake you could bite it (yeah I said it)

You come out holding your body and Sanji pauses and just bleeds all over the damn place

Took you an hour to get off the beach because he kept passing out

Sanji really felt happy that you were comfortable enough to express your feelings to him so all day he was by your side

Yes his hands and eyes were on your butt

And as promised he brought the shirt and towel which you didn’t need because he made you feel so comfortable:(🤍

One guy did whistle at you, but Sanji kicked the shit out of him

He also had your thighs wrapped around his shoulder in the water and carried you around

All in all Sanji made you forget why you were insecure about your beautiful booty in the first place

Luffy

Luffy doesn’t quite understand but bless his heart he’s TRYING

You’ve told him about your insecurities about your butt and he really doesn’t fucking get why you don’t like it

He has actually turned you around and pulled up a dress you were wearing and stared at your butt saying “So what if it’s big it’s nice.”

Since then he subconsciously touches your butt

Very shamelessly

He doesn’t make you to wear any less baggy clothing but he will encourage you if you ask him, like if you should wear tights

“Yeah wear those Your but jiggles a lot when you wear em!”

Just like Zoro and Sanji he’ll Gum Gum tf outta somebody if they make disgusting comments about your body

Luffy wanted you to buy him some meat so you both went to a food vendor and while waiting in line as Luffy was sitting on the benches to the side watching you happily, a man pushed up against you cupping your butt in the process

“Hey! I felt that why’d you do that!?”

“Not my fault darling you got a lot going on back there…I just simply fell.”

You wanted to beat his ass but you were so close to getting Luffy’s food. It wasn’t too long until then you felt the creeps body really close behind you.

You prayed he’d just move but there was a crowd of people around you and you knew you’d have to clear the damn room if he touched you again

His hand was creeping up your thigh and you felt it even under your thick pants but that was until

“Luffy!”

Your sweet boyfriend GGP that mf down the street.

Luffy was watching you closely after hearing you yell at the man. He didn’t quite read your words correctly but he knew you were uncomfortable and he found out why

He grumbled grabbing your waist to be stretched over to him

“Weirdo. You okay?”

“Mmhm.” You really thank God for his stretchy body

“Good! Let’s go to a different food place for meat!”

The rest of the walk you were in front of him instead of beside him

“It’s okay, Y/N I’ll protect you.” He spoke in your ear “Not ganna let any assholes touch you.”

He has without effort helped you get over your dislike of your round tookus

[chronotsr]

No. 1 - G1, The Steading of the Hill Giant Chief (July 1978)

Author(s): Gary Gygax Artist(s): Erol Otus, Dave C. Sutherland III (cover), David A. Trampier Level range: Average of 9, preferably 5+ players Theme: Standard Swords and Sorcery Major re-releases: G1-3 Against the Giants, GDQ1-7 Queen of the Spiders, Against the Giants: The Liberation of Geoff, Dungeon #197, Tales from the Yawning Portal

I'm not sure if G1-G3 are the most remastered adventures of all time, but it's gotta be competitive. I think Tomb of Horrors might have it beat, but I haven't counted. The 4e conversion [the Dungeon #197 one] is really weird in particular because…4e feels like the edition least interested in the legacy of DND? It was boldly doing its own thing. A good quality, actually.

Anyway, it's time to slag off* on a beloved adventure. Note, I am using the earliest copy of G1 I can find, which is from waaaay later when D3 was complete. I apologize.

*And by slag off, I mean "be critical of at all". In practice, this module is actually showing some unusual acumen compared to its contemporaries.

EDIT: I forgot to mention a rather important thing when this was made live -- note the title there! We are officially in ADND land now, so put away your little brown booklets and switch over to the fuck-off awesome player's handbook with the iconic Moloch statue!

Somehow I had gotten my whole life at this point never really…understanding what this structure was supposed to look like? It looks like this.

I honestly think exterior shots of dungeons are critically underrated. Handouts are amazing and being able to flash the back cover art to safely show the party "like this" is actually great, I deeply wish that….any? of the previous modules had done that? I think the only one that did was Tsojconth. Weirdly, the interior drawing is very subtly different. Look at how the logs face:

Not a huge deal but, a kind of weird inconsistency that top one looks like a stockade and the bottom one looks like a log cabin. Side note, we know that the long dimension of this is using 210 feet tall logs, which is to say, the size of an average redwood. These are some big fuck-off trees -- which could be a very interesting detail about the local area.

Now the setup is pretty simple. You were hired to go beat up the giants because they've been raiding the local humans, figure out why they're raiding, and comeback posthaste. The locals have kitted you out with horses, guides, maps, et c -- but no compensation, they have simply omitted a finder's fee (cheap bastards). Also, if you fail, they'll execute you. With friends like these, who needs Giants?

Gary starts with some mild railroading (you accepted the job already, you are already kitted out, you already walked to a nearby cave, you waited til dusk to approach, you notice two guards are missing, and the cave is guaranteed to be moderately hidden. Sure, whatever, I'm going to ignore that if I run this tho. Gary notifies us of a few critical details:

Don't run this stock, that's immoral

Any surviving giants will flee to G2 if they have the opportunity (which, kind of inherently punishes clever play that avoids combat?)

There is a 2% chance per round that the wooden structure will be lit on fire due to chronic rain (why is this a dice roll??)

If you will permit me a tangent, player arson is truly the bane of interesting scenarios everywhere. Whenever a player wonders, "why are all the GM's dungeons underground or in stonework buildings?", it's because doing anything else invites arson as the default and best answer to all problems. Magic items are fireproof and most metal items will not get hot enough to be destroyed, so very often the best solution is to burn the place to the ground and loot it the next day. So, yeah. No wood buildings. Gary's fix is to have all the giants flee into the basement, then waste a week of the PC's time for daring to use arson. Kind of sucks!

Tangent complete.

Here's some random interesting bits:

Gary explicitly states that you can pass yourself off as hill giant kids, which is extremely funny. Minus the implicit child murder.

Naturally there are giant moms doing giant housemaid shit in several rooms. Presumably they have giant curlers too.

The secret door is, literally just a doorway covered by a pelt. I have to hand it to them, that'd trip up most players in 2024 AND make them feel stupid for not figuring it out!

The big reveal that Eclavdra the Drow is secretly behind it all is so lightly teased that it feels downright tasteful.

A giant that uses a ballista as a crossbow (based) and spears for arrows (also based) -- between the prevalence of lightning spears and greatarrows, one starts to think of a certain famous video game. Genuinely I think it'd be a fun exercise one day, for someone who is more knowledgeable than me about Japanese fantasy roleplaying culture, to talk about how anglophone fantasy works made their way into Japan and were interpreted.

One of the cloud giants has hidden a sentient giant slaying sword that speaks all the giant languages, it feels like there's a hell of a story going on there that is only alluded to!

To my knowledge, this is the first official depiction of an orc in DND? Which implies that Gary is team pig-orcs, which is cool. Frankly, I love porcine orcs, or even better just pigfolk in general, they're great.

I think it is actually a rather bold early stance for Gary to hold that, even here in 1978, Chaotic aligned creatures are not automatically friends. Granted, that's how it is in Elric, so it's not THAT bold, but clearly everyone else missed the memo. The orcs are willing to side with you at least in the short-run, and in our previous modules it was very rare to have groups of chaotic-aligned creatures fighting one another. It was always just personal beefs. In fact, the overall theme of G1 so far is that despite the boxy-ass dungeon design, there's already a command of naturalism that even modern dungeons really struggle with. Factionalism truly is the gift that keeps on giving for the GM!

So the big reveal internally to G1 (just think of that -- a reveal internally to G1, and externally to the GDQ supermodule -- we're already getting pacing!) is that the orc slaves have rebelled. And -- hey -- good for them. There's also a kind of…built-in companion refill system going on here? So in oldish DND the way it works is, the expectation is the party is not just 5 guys with swords. You've got companions to help fight, and you've got hirelings to do other stuff (test suspected traps, if you're evil). And you can only hire so many of these guys from town, but attrition is going to happen. So the modules simply provides, automatic replacements should you negotiate worth a quarter of a shit. A dwarf slave here, an orc slave there. Maybe a giant dissenter if you're really clever. One of the potential "rewards" you can get is more dudes to throw at problems.

More interesting bits

There is, what I can only really call an abortive idea going on here where there's a scary temple in the basement? But no one worships there and no information is provided. It is merely a fucked up altar. I think I vaguely recall that it's retconned Tharizdun in one of the remakes? They always retcon things to be Tharizdun. Busy man, Tharzy.

Gary, Gary no. Stop it. Stop this 78 guys bullshit. I thought we had established that giant rooms of giant clumps of guys was bad. I know you have terminal Napoleonics brain but stop.

Wait, Steading is a noun? I always thought it was a verb. Yknow, like "Steading those hill giants", taking 'em down a notch. Apparently, a Steading is a small farm -- same etymology as Homestead. I guess mark that as our first Gygaxism?

Our second Gygaxism is gill, which is "a quarter pint of an alcoholic drink", which is to say a few mouthfuls

Always end your adventures with weird, ominous non-diegetic text. On the flip-side, absolutely do not do what the adventure does, and end on a teleporter that takes you to the next dungeon. That is the worst option.

Anyway, that's the whole Hill Giant situation. Honestly, it's better than I remembered, but in proud module tradition up to this point it gets weirdly filler-y in the basement. There's just something about basements that makes dungeon designers stop giving a shit, I swear. I do need to give the man his due, even though he was a shitass person: Gygax wrote an 11 page module that is of noticeably higher killer-to-filler ratio than any of his contemporaries. G1 is better than any of its predecessors, pound for pound. It is way, way shorter which is I suppose a plus to me and a minus to others, but -- there is a clear internal logic to this place that is tragically missing from (say) The Dwarven Glory. And that internal logic is the beginning of good adventure design. Anyway, we have two fun tidbits to discuss before we end for the day.

First up, we have an of-the-time account of events in Dragon #19! It turns out that in Origins '78 they played G1-G3's prototype. The account is of the winners (mostly West Virginians, a few Michiganders), who used their magic extremely liberally to hide what they were doing as well as to scout. They did opt to light the place on fire, good for them! If you want to check this out, it's on page 3. I will mention G2 and G3 here as relevant later.

Second up, there's a weird interquel hiding in Dungeon #198! Hanging out as an informal G1.5 is "The Warrens of the Stone Giant Thane!" I will not review it in full because my understanding of 4e is, basically just skimming the PHB and reading the DMG, but essentially the Stone Giants are hypothetically aloof and not particularly loyal to their Fire Giant superiors, but someone gave them The Rock That Makes You Crazy and so now they are. Smash the rock!

Man, map design in the 4e era was so fucking bad. It looks fine, but like, this is four circles. And downstairs is, of course, cave as far as the eye can see. Aren't stone giants supposed to be skilled carvers? Anyway, If you feel like G2 would be too big of a jump mechanically compared to G1, this exists. I'm sure you could use it if you liked, and certainly there is a Genre of Grognard who would be kinda tickled at the thought of finding "lost content" for el classico GDQ.

Next week, we cover G2, which was also in July. So was G3! They're triplets!

[waterspoutskies]

For the wip game: side quest gremlins? XD

Sidequest Gremlins!

Ok so I'd have to go digging for where Ruby put the art, I can't remember if it's on her tumblr or not...

FOUND IT it's here

Anyway it was for the discord birthday event themed for trios way back when! and Ruby and I planned to submit the fic and art together but thanks to my incompetence with school- oh hold on I lied it wasn't incompetence with school, that was my brother's senior year, I stand corrected, I missed the deadline because I had to watch him and his relay team mark the fastest time in the US for the year. Anyway the fic never fully panned out on my end.

The premise was that Wild and Hyrule and Wind coming back from one of their own little adventures and getting in deep trouble because Hyrule twisted his ankle and is out of magic, Wild got hurt and absolutely plastered in dirt (and broke a sword), Wind tripped backwards into the stream walking back, and all of them are fucking lying about what they were doing. And the joke was the reference to that one panel where Wolfie is fetching Hyrule and Wild and Wild goes "They're not mad, they're furious, I can tell"

It never got a name either because I could not get one to stick properly, but it did actually get mostly done, so have a few bits of it and hopefully I can wrap that up this summer!

“I told you we should’ve gotten the map!”  “And I told you there are no maps for random caves!”  “Maps are for Legend.” The squabbling pair gave him a look- one curious, one suspicious- and he elaborated. “They suck all the fun out of things.”

“Now what will they find? A group of skilled and extra awesome adventurers of course! Defeating all the invading moblins in sight,” Wind announced, waving his arms in a grandiose movement.  “Some of them more amazing than others?” Hyrule stumbled and winced, almost yanking Wild off balance.

So yeah fun stuff! Sidequesting Gremlins right here!

[asamis-jodhpurs]

Please tell me about your most chaotic D&D fic!

Okay this isn't a WIP it's fully complete and has been for three years but it is the most chaotic.

I'm going to have to read more this good god the amount of context I have to provide christ alive. I looked at this ask and I went I could like vaguely speedily sum this up or could make this a Whole Thing and it's a Friday night and I've had wine so I will be providing Full Context.

So. It was like a month after I'd graduated college, dem was like six sessions into running our Curse of Strahd campaign, and in Curse of Strahd there is an insane starving vampire spawn boy in the basement of the church in Barovia Village who you're typically intended to mercy-kill in the first act. His official character art looks like this:

However, because she is a genius and the most gifted woman on planet earth, dem went, "That priest's son who is going through it is my new comfort character. He's trans now and has a Cloud-Strife-esque desperate desire to prove himself on a grand scale that manifests as him trying to be cool and disaffected and also he has the worst ideas on god's green earth and is absolutely primed to become religiously obsessed with the first buff girl with a sword and traumatic mental illness who shows him kindness."

And well. I played Bath, a buff girl with a sword and traumatic mental illness who showed him kindness (also all art in this post that is not the official art above is dem's). The two of them were nice to one another for the span of a couple seconds and were doomed more or less instantly to mutual devoted weird obsession forever:

Dem and I would go on to spend an extremely funny year pretending that Bath and Doru (and that me and dem) were not wildly and embarrassingly in love. Bribe the Officials, Kill All the Judges was written very early in that year.

So in the sixth session of our campaign, we decided to break into Ravenloft with Doru (see above re: worst decisions on God's green earth) and steal a bunch of Strahd's stuff, unaware of the fact that dem was planning to gut-punch us with the canonical rule that vampires can control their spawn. Meaning Strahd could Ella Enchanted force Doru to walk away from the screaming, protesting, ugly-sobbing party and keep him prisoner before throwing the still screaming, protesting, and ugly-sobbing party out on his doorstep, leaving Doru to an uncertain fate that was definitely going to suck really profoundly:

So.

Rather than confront the agony of not knowing what was going to happen to mine and my paladin girl's favorite little graph paper guy for five months, I sat down with multiple tabs open with an encounter balancer and notes on the abilities all our party members would have at higher levels, and I said:

And I wrote 36 single-spaced pages in a week about how we could plausibly rescue our boy from the clutches of evil, featuring a full bossfight, fifth-level Wall of Force, and so, so much hugging and crying.

It is the only time in my life I have ever written fix-it fic, and it was for a narrative that was not finished and that me and my friends had total control over, and I felt like I had a fever the entire time I was writing it.

Anyway like a year after I shared it in the Discord I brought it up casually in a voicecall with dem and she laughed and said, "God, you're fucking insane, I love you."

It was the first time she said that. ☺️

[fandomfluffandfuck]

hello mr s, i come into your humble inbox filled with horny thoughts 🥴 imagine with me: what tells do you think (pre/post-serum) steve n bucky might have when they're close to orgasm?

(just some bonus thoughts to ponder) who would be more vocal between the two of them? chanting the other's name, or quietly gasping and groaning? do they lose control of their limbs or are they fucking solely on instinct? who is likelier to grab the other's face, desperately wanting to devour their mouth, and be devoured in turn as they careen towards their climax? 😩

whew! as always, thanks for aiding and abetting all these horny anons parading around your blog, i appreciate each and every one of y'all 💖

Hey, sweets!

I feel like you'll enjoy this ask that similarly talks about the different canon Steve's, but instead of tells for orgasm it's about lingerie!

I'm gonna twist this prompt a little bit and talk specifically about how they react at the moment of orgasm because... 😏 why not?

1. Pre-serum & pre-war Steve:

When I was considering what to write for this ask--it's a lot of detail because of the different versions I see of Steve and Bucky and how I think they grow and evolve--I immediately had this thought:

I bet pre-serum Steve holds his breath when he cums.

I have no idea why I think that. But. Brain just said so, so it must be so. That's why they call it a head canon.

Pre-serum Steve has heart trouble, and his body doesn't always want to stay with the program (re: he doesn't always stay hard), so Bucky and him have perfected the art of keeping his heart rate between high enough to keep his erection but not too high to trigger his arrhythmia. Additionally, Bucky and Steve have had plenty of practice stabilizing Steve's breathing to make sure that he doesn't have an asthma attack during sex. And somewhere along the lines of that...

Steve's evolved this response of lying limp and not breathing, going silent as he cums.

Bucky thinks it's hot as fuck.

Steve will be digging his nails into him--his artist hands are stronger and bonier than they have any right to be--groaning softly, tension all over in his body, trying not to make too much noise even though it feels so good, and then he'll tip over the edge--

And he'll have this moment.

His dark eyes roll back into his head, eyelashes fluttering, and his mouth falls open, but no sound comes out of him. He's entirely quiet. His chest doesn't stutter or heave. He's simply... suspended in the pleasure.

Frozen in the moment. Except, at the same time that he's frozen, he's consumed by flames.

Hot.

When Steve comes out of it, falling from his peak, his lungs rasp, desperate, like he might have an asthma attack right then, but he never does; Steve never says it hurts or feels bad. He shivers sometimes, gasping. Instead, he says it leaves him feeling spacy and good, just a little dizzy. It's good. Really good.

1. Pre-serum & prewar Bucky

Steve is the quiet one between the two of them. He's also the one who has more control over himself. So, while Steve goes silent and lies limp, reveling in the pleasure, just trying to take in the pleasure as it fries his nerves, Bucky is the one that more often than not needs a hand slapped over his mouth--his own or Steve's.

Bucky has a special weakness for Steve's hand over his mouth, or Steve's fingers in his mouth gagging him, giving him something to suck on. It's a double-edged sword, though. Muffled as he might be, if it's Steve's fingers in his mouth, he's absolutely going cross-eyed and moaning louder than he would've anyway. Little shit.

Still, Bucky just can't help but moan and groan and swear as he cums. He also tends to shake. Vibrate. It just feels really good. There's something about pleasure and Steve that brings the really, really raw edge out of Bucky.

Bucky's been with dames, when he cums with a dame, because of a dame, its different. It's still fucking good. It can be fucking great. But, no matter what he does with Steve it's always fucking great. When he's with a dame at least when he moans in her ear as he cums, she doesn't mind it and he's not totally afraid to be caught. Sure, nobody wouldn't sneer at them, they ain't married, but... it's not illegal.

Bucky moans in Steve's ear and Steve's thin chest heaves with desire, but Steve also shushes him, drawing his fingers through Bucky's hair where it hangs over his forehead, his sweat wearing out his pomade and curling the damp strands. He can't do that. Shut up.

So, instead of moaning into Steve's ear, because he can't be trusted to control his volume, Bucky moans into the hot skin of his palm. Hand over mouth.

Steve's flattered that he can't control it, that his jaw drops open and stays there. Lungs heaving. Throat contracting around those pretty sounds. Steve likes it. He desperately wants to hear more of it. He regularly has... particularly stimulating fantasies about taking Bucky away, somewhere else--the woods, great plains, or anywhere remote--and doing everything he can to be able to hear those moans loud and fucking clear. Sometimes, he wonders, his sadistic side peaking through, what he could do to get Bucky to scream.

2. WWii & freshly post-serum Steve

Throw everything out the window that you think you know about how Steve cums from the above drabble 👀

It all changes when Steve gets the serum. Suddenly, no matter what he does, he can't seem to get his body to get rid of his erection. He can't get his heart to stop racing. Booming in his suddenly large chest. But it never comes with any pain or dizziness. It's just... doing what it's supposed to?

And those two symptoms, a constant fucking boner and a pounding heart, are not even to mention how overwhelming everything feels now.

It's a riot under his skin whenever he gets aroused. Which. Is often.

He feels like he's become Bucky. He can't cum without biting his fist so hard that he tastes blood or stuffing fucking... any clothing item into his mouth to muffle himself. Why does he suddenly have to be so loud when he's in the worst fucking place to be loud? 😫 He's surrounded all the time. First, the USO girls, then soldiers, and, God, he can't catch a break.

He can't help the sounds. Whimpers and whines and moans. His voice goes all high and thin. He can't. It feels like he's on the edge of sobs right before he cums, then when he does cum, if he doesn't sob outright, he ends up squeezing his eyes so tight that they spill over anyway. And his orgasm always feels like it lasts and lasts and lasts--

The peak of his orgasm stretching out into this, this minute? This hour? This agonizing length of time that means he makes a huge fucking mess with cum. The serum made everything bigger, including his cock and balls, but it also made the volume of semen inside his larger balls increase. Steve's ashamed. It's so much.

It's so much.

He feels so much.

He moans, he cries, he cums and cums, and he breaks fucking everything. He rips his sheets, fisting them, going through them like paper; he breaks his cot, grabbing it too hard; he bends his dogtags, aching for something, anything to hold onto and scrambling, finding his tags and squeezing.

If he cums with a forcefully muffled sound and not the sound of something being ripped or snapping it's a fucking miracle.

He doesn't go limp anymore. He squeezes. Tension all through his body. Even in his feet, which curl until his soles cramp. Every orgasm feels like it's ripped up from the base of his soul. He's so easy to make cum and yet... every orgasm is devastating.

2. WWii Bucky

Bucky during the war is much the same as he was before the war except... infected with Steve's desperate, fucking urgent desires and polluted with his own brand of life-or-death urgency after being brought back from across enemy lines. So, now, he's just more reckless and desperate. His sounds get more guttural. Deeper. Drastic. He shakes harder and clings harder, too.

Silver lining, though, those louder, more deep, desperate sounds are pretty easy to muffle these days; all Bucky has to do is bury his face into Steve's tits. It's all he wants to do anyway. Motorboat Steve. Jesus Christ. He could suffocate between his fucking knockers. And when he's there, he's not as loud.

Perfect.

Although, however strong the urge to faceplant into Steve's pecs is, more often then not, after being separated and threatened with death, they now end up cumming face to face. Mouths open and panting together, sharing the same hot, humid air. Trying their damn best to choke back their sounds and... not being very successful. Bucky's gutted, rasping groans and moans. Steve's high-pitched, overwhelmed whimpers and gasps and moans. They're so fucking lucky the Howlies put up with their shit.

But, face to face as they are--grasping urgently at each other, distance having only made them more firmly attached to each other--just means Bucky gets a close-up on seeing how Steve's orgasm face has changed...

It hasn't.

Not really.

His eyes still roll back into his head, and his mouth hangs open, red, as his entire face flushes. It's all just turned up to eleven. It's just more desperate and needy and, God, is it pretty.

He's so pretty. He always was. (Not that Bucky would've said it back then.) A walkin' angel, but now he's here, and he's really Bucky's angel, saving his life and bringing him to his knees. Bucky is devoted to him, moreso than any holy diety. So, Steve can't get rid of Bucky. All Bucky can do is hang off of them whenever they're in private. Desperate to feel him.

3. Modern Steve before Bucky returns

The first few orgasms Steve has before Bucky returns are lined thickly with guilt and sadness and pain especially. Emotional pain mostly. He doesn't really... want to.

He needs to, but he doesn't want to. He takes to referring, internally, to these physical needs as "maintenance" orgasms. Maintenance because apparently, freezing a fella for seventy fucking years backs him up--his balls are swollen and achy and for the first year-ish he cums so much that he can't masturbate anywhere but in the shower.

It's even more embarrassing without a partner to go dark-eyed over it, biting his lip hard in an effort not to swear seven ways to Sunday, and get him through it until he's got nothing left to give because he's simply curious to see how much he has in the tank. How far can he push him?

Yeah. It's different without someone else there.

Just. He doesn't think...

It wasn't--

It wasn't this much when he came after he got the serum a lifetime ago. So, he doesn't really get why now, after his time in the Arctic, he's got even more cum but... he does.

And it's so much.

It's, like, a comical amount. Enough to drown himself.

It eases off, eventually, but Steve is still pretty sure it's even more cum now than it used to be. Passively, he wonders why, but he's not about to tell anyone (or, God forbid, ask a doctor about) how his jizz fluctuated upon waking up.

3. [I'm not going to talk about Bucky during HYDRA or when he's breaking his brainwashing for this]

4. Modern Steve after Bucky returns

When Bucky is back to himself, he's absolutely back to his old games...

He fucking loves what the serum did to Steve. He seems downright obsessed with making him get as many erections as possible and takes almost sick pleasure in getting him off every time he gets it up. Even after they're both sore and raw and exhausted.

Bucky fucking cheers, like a goddamn dork, the first time he gets Steve to cum so much that he cums dry.

Nothing left to give.

And when Steve cums dry, it's like he's hard reset--rather than moaning high and feminine and jesusfuckingchrist making these sounds that're so whiny and fuck-me that it's not even fair, as he shakes and clenches and breaks shit, he just breaks.

He falls entirely limp. Mouth open wide, gaped, drool shiny on his candy red lips and chin. He can't seem to make a sound. While Bucky's been at this, Steve's voice has gone in waves, getting hoarse, then the serum will knit him back together, good as new, then he'll moan himself raw again, and--

He can't make a sound, though.

He cums dry, and he cums silently, lying in a puddle of his own sweat, boneless. Surrendering to the current of overwhelming, forest-fire level pleasure.

It throws Bucky all the way back to the 30s/40s Brooklyn.

That's exactly what his lil Stevie looked like cumming. Strings cut. Desperately holding it all in, needing to maintain secrecy, their own little world. Pink head to toe. Blushing all the way to his ears and down his chest. Swollen lips. Hard, pointed nipples. Drooling, twitching cock.

God.

It makes Bucky want to make him cum like this all the time, stripping him of every inhibition until he can't even react to the pleasure anymore and falls entirely weak. As good as his over-the-top, entirely overwhelmed reactions to pleasure are... there's something special about finding something old and realizing it anew.

4. Modern Bucky after deprogramming

Bucky has his own entire journey with his body, obviously, and he learns a whole shit ton about how he works with the serum in his veins. How sensitive he suddenly is, not only on par with Steve in strength but also in nerves. His nerves feel raw, so much closer to the surface than they were before, and even that--even his skin feels more alive now. Just Steve's palm hot on the small of his back goes right to his dick. And his dick. Christ. He can go and go and go. Maybe not as rapidly, back-to-back-to-back as Steve, but he's also never been as into pain and discomfort as Steve so... that tracks. He also doesn't cum as much as Steve does, but that's an impossible measure. Steve floods like he busted a pipe when he orgasms.

[Insert that clip of Sebastian talking about the "game" Bucky played in Romania with his metal arm here 😏]

Sometimes, Bucky finds himself looking back, realizing that it wasn't just the repeated near-death experiences that made sex with Steve after Steve had the serum running through his veins feel different. More urgent. Primal. Now, now, now. It was his first doses of serum. Burning through him like alcohol. Raising his libido to a fever pitch.

There are still similarities from the past, though. Bucky's ability to control his volume hasn't gotten any better. It's gotten worse. His moans remain at the pitch they were during the war, ragged and desperate and raw because of how fucking good it feels.

It feels so goddamn good that Bucky starts this habit of curling into a ball when he cums. He wants to curl around his core, throbbing with want--white-hot, sticky, and too much to bear. He can't help it! It just happens. Every orgasm feels ripped out of him. Suddenly, he understands why Steve bent his dogtags so many times during the war. He understands why they broke so many cots. Why so many branches broke under Steve's hands. Why he had to sew his uniform so often, or get patches, lest he have to explain to command how he ruined his fatigues again.

Christ.

It feels good.

5. Nomad Steve

Steve's moans and whines and gasps disappear or fade into these rough, deep sounds. He starts fucking growling and Bucky doesn't know where the hell that part of him comes from but he pulls it out of Steve at every opportunity. He flaunts his body--softened by his time in hiding in a place with incredible tech and medicine and even more incredible food--until Steve folds.

Steve gives him that new fucking growl and stalks up to him and takes--

Bucky is going to figure out how to make a list of every person who has pissed Steve off over the years, every system that's told him to go fuck himself, and he's gonna write them a goddamn thank you letter. Whatever, whoever pulled the bastard out of his fucking boyfriend.

A bastard that makes Bucky scream, and then he laughs about it.

He laughs now, it's not that he didn't before, but he'll chuckle. Dirty and mean and then groan or growl and Christ.

It's hot.

It makes those little, softer, higher sounds so much sweeter, though.

Steve will be growling and giving it to him, bruising his softer, more plush body, getting mean on him, and Bucky will touch him just right--he'll scratch him behind the ear, where his long, dirty-blond hair is beginning to curl, he'll put his lips to work on his cock, pressed all the way down the hair at the base, lips and tongue working at Steve's hole between his round cheeks--and Steve will crumble.

His chest will heave, and he'll whine.

The sweetest little sound coming out of this huge, hulking man.

God.

That's when he's cumming. Right then. He cracks, crying out, and his head drops onto any part of Bucky that he can reach, forehead to his shoulder, face tucked into his neck, pressed against his tummy, anything. He shakes, clinging extra hard. Totally falling apart.

5. Wakanda Bucky

It'd probably the reason Steve and Bucky are Steve and Bucky--they balance each other out. There's something about the way Steve hardens that leaves Bucky melting.

Steve growls and groans until he doesn't, and Bucky takes to gasping, making all these sweet, breathy noises that he didn't realize he could still make. He thought he lost it somewhere along the lines of growing up and going to war. He thought the unending hunger now inside him since receiving the serum had him losing those noises. Apparently not, they just needed to be pulled out of him.

Pulled out of him, more like ripped out of him.

Ripped out like his screams. Raw and visceral. He's screamed because of Steve before, but now, if he doesn't entirely lose it and let it go (at least) every other time... it's strange.

Also, Steve's new, extra-intense propensity for being touched, needing to press into Bucky and be close reminds Bucky of a cat. A lion, maybe. No matter, Bucky responds in kind, he suddenly feels like he can only breathe when Steve is touching him. Some part of him has always felt that, but he clings. He clings. He trembles and makes sweet sounds and has to be so close as he cums. He can't. He can't. He still curls up around Steve, but he needs him. He needs to be as close as he physically can. And it still doesn't feel like enough.

It's the desperation of the serum all over again. They can't keep their hands away from each other. They never can, but, y’know... Bucky's never been more glad he doesn't have neighbors.

6. Retired Steve + Retired Bucky

Retirement leaves both Steve and Bucky reckless. Sweet reckless. Nothing matters. They can do whatever the fuck they want to do. Anything. Any discernable pattern of what it'll be like when they give into their urges goes out the window.

Sometimes Steve feels it boil up inside him, thick and lava-hot, and it comes out with a growl that he can't possibly control. Other times, it's an equally uncontrollable and needy whine or cry that's 100% pathetic. It comes from the same primal instinct.

The same need.

Steve just doesn't know what it is until it is.

And somehow Bucky's on the same page. Every time. Right there with him, feeling like being sweet when Steve is feeling like roughing him up, needing to be demanding and mean when Steve needs him to be, being what he feels and just fucking being exactly what Steve needs. Steve needs him so badly.

Bucky needs Steve so badly.

They oscillate rapidly. Nothing they do isn't good. Why wouldn't it be? There's no point in doing anything they don't want to. They deserve it. So they explore. They take the time to tear each other apart in every way they can imagine.

The other Avengers like to tease them for being scandalized by modern life, but only if they knew what retirement is for them. They know for a fact they would be the scandalized ones

I hope you enjoyed that. It was pretty rambling and not very structured, but 🤷🏻‍♂️ sometimes that's how it is

Also, yes! I love all the horny anons around these parts, lmao.

[transboykirito]

gonna ATTEMPT to word this properly please bare with me

obviously slutty bisexuals and pervy lesbians are a bad stereotype. i am very aware of that. i would love some rep that isn’t… those. however, counterpoint: at the end of the day pito and clarence are still sword art online characters. sword art online, the series that brought you heterosexual people and vaguely homosexual people doing uncomfortable things to one another for *checks calendar* 20 slutty, slutty years.

kirito held asuna in place until she stopped struggling for their first kiss. lis is the centre of multiple gags in extra edition where the punchline is just “haha she’s flirting/touching/being horny for a girl” - most infamously, the boob-grab with sugu. strea is the same, so many of the gameverse jokes and events fall back on strea being perverted towards men and women alike. quinella exists, and all the uncomfortable things she did were still bad and manipulative, even if we’re told they “wanted it.” it sucks. it really fucking sucks. but it’s also something that happens and we deal with it.

if these gags were only ever used for wlw characters (or queer characters in general), then i would have a bigger issue with it. but it happens with het characters all the time in the main series, and it happens with het characters in ggo alternative too. i hate that it happens at all, but it’s not specific to queer characters, and those moments aren’t really specific to their sexualities anyway.

like i said, my opinion is that i’d rather have flawed rep than not having any rep at all. a mainstream series like sao having explicitly queer characters was cool, and it made me feel so emotional and feel so seen watching it. even if it wasn’t perfect, it made people feel a little more represented.

[fyx-ation]

Sometimes when I'm watching a new anime and it gets outside my comfort zone because it's just gross, I will literally pause and scrunch up my face like I'm impersonating Elvis and Mr. Bean at the same time. I'll always give it a fair shake and watch a little more, but if it happens a couple more times... I'm out.

For example, this one isekai goes full throttle into threatening rape on characters right from the get-go. I don't generally watch isekai much because most have been icky. Sword Art Online? Soon as it started getting rapey, I peaced out. But that's not even the one I'm talking about. The one I'm trying to watch right now has one of those run-on sentence titles like I Got Transported to a Fantasy Land and I suck but I'll Become Powerful Anyway While Boobs Bounce in My Face as I Destroy the Goddess. Failure Frame is the secondary title, I think?

I don't know. As I get older, I have a lower and lower tolerance for fan service and unnecessary "sexualized in defeat" segments. Or child abuse. Just. Yuck.

There's a million other things to watch out there.

Don't commit to garbage just because you read or watched the first few of something. It's always okay to go, "Nah," and back away. You can do it at any point. Same thing goes for mediocre media. Maybe something you once loved just starts getting bad. It's okay to let it go. You don't owe it your time. Shit, I couldn't even finish Supernatural, and I watched over ten?? seasons of that. I couldn't even "hate watch" it to completion. Walking Dead, too. Started strong, but I stopped after season 4? 5? I don't even remember; it was that unimportant in the long run.

(Fucked up younger me would be aghast at the thought of this. I had to finish things. I had to collect things. I had to have the WHOLE thing. It's like my brain developed attachments brewed from the sunk cost fallacy and the physical value of things. Having half of something=it's worthless. Only when it's complete does it have any value. If you see even an inkling of this behavior in yourself, address it now while you have objectivity. Don't support shit that you don't actually thoroughly enjoy. You don't owe the creators anything.)

[terrence-silver]

Terrys fav sex position? 😁

---

― One just gets the impression that right from the get-go, Terry Silver might be into anything that is super complicated, requires an exemplary (and near sadistic) amount of physical flexibility, athleticism, strength and stamina, being genuinely difficult to preform for anyone that isn't, you know, Terry himself, giving himself an almost hilariously unfair advantage and by extension, having the upper hand during any intimate encounter, which is exactly and precisely his goal anyway. Being large and in charge. He enjoys stuff straight out of the Kama Sutra's most complex positions or whatever obscure, exotic tantric sex almanac he might hold coveted. To put it bluntly, his leanings towards martial artistry, Karate, Tang Soo Do, The Way of the Fist and combat as a whole are undoubtedly very much bleeding into his sex life to where rigorous training, warm up and exercise are all reflected in how he fucks. Which means you might end up a tangled mess of limbs in a stress position, panting, in a chokehold, exhausted, beaten, taunted and sprawled out on your back fairly quickly, with every bone in your body in pain and it is only just foreplay. The main course hasn't even arrived yet, making sex with Terry Silver an occasionally daunting prospect for the uninitiated because it requires actual preparation, like running a marathon. It is hard to tell if this is sex or a sparring session. Both? Is there a difference even? Generally speaking, man likes to watch you struggle.

― Man also likes being in control. No, in fact, he loves it! It is crucial to Terry. Whether he's on top, if he's fucking you from behind, if you've his cock in your mouth, if he's holding you down and eating you out, sucking you off, pleasuring you, punishing you, edging you, having you tied up or not, if he's a power bottom coordinating you and directing you as you ride him, if this is plain, old missionary where his eyes are piercing into your soul as he doesn't blink, regardless, positions don't matter as much so long as he's lording over the authority scale. If he's the one directing things. Being master and teacher. Positions are semantics, because he's for sure tried them all a hundred times over and he is firm on trying them all over with you. Possibly invented a couple of positions yet unheard of, for all we know, much like he has a penchant for inventing fighting styles and naming them. Who is to say he doesn't do the same for poses? But, if something is thrillingly debauched, rare, interesting, unusual, slightly bizarre and maybe just as daunting, borderline taboo and downright depraved, Terry is certain to get a kick out of it and deem it his new favorite thing...for now, until he gets you two to try the next new favorite depraved thing, boiling you slowly, accustoming you to the heat of his sexual preferences and perversities like a frog being cooked in a slow burning kettle. Not before long, you'll be convinced hardcore sadomasochism is pretty standard. Your body will crave it because he'll get you used to it. Hooked on it as your new normal.

― Having you grind on his face is also pretty standard. How about him grinding on your face, practically suffocating you with his sheer size and weight compared to your own? How about desperately try to get yourself off by rubbing yourself on the sharp tip of his polished leather shoes for some extra humiliation? Fucking in shibari and suspension, with you on the receiving end, naturally, where to gets to broadcast his skill with the the ancient art of the rope? Getting bounced on his cock while you're tied up, unable to move or do anything but take it, gagged, facing his scrutinizing gaze? Worshiping his ass? Worshipping his toes? Maybe earning yourself a warning, disciplinary kick of varying strength if you don't do it right, followed by a teasing chortle? Edging and getting you off with the hilt of his sword, one of many from his coveted collection, pushed between your legs? Fucking you bent over the edge of his mansion's balcony, having you give your trust and agency over to him in the belief he's strong enough not to drop you and that it'll be exciting enough to where the danger that he technically could is a turn on. Acrobatic theatrics where he gets to show off by balancing both himself and you on only his arms. Maybe choosing to utilize his legs next when he decides to be more lenient. Go figure. Putting you in near impossible poses and training you how to preform them for his pleasure. It is equally delicious when you fail, and you'll fail many times, and it'll be a delight to watch.

― Ultimately, he has no concrete favorite pose, nor least favorite one, finding potential in all of them, because Terry's a bit of a chameleonic Jack of all Trades in general in every regard and an accomplished master of just as many. Because when he desires someone genuinely, he desires them in any capacity possible, and in every capacity possible to express his overwhelming, manic need and ownership of them to the point he might just run out of valid positions to do it in, needing to improvise, invent and design new ways to fuck in the hedonistic and somewhat perfectionistic pursuit of overcoming himself and the limits of the sexual imagination (always pushing himself one step further), refusing to be caged in by them, finally coming full circle and landing with simple, no nonsense fucking --- sensual and intense, maybe overly so --- without any shanenigans, rituals and additions; something that is perhaps the hardest to achieve and ease into for someone so hellbent on control of the mind, body and soul of everything and everyone around him and the psychological reason why Terry opted for such complicated and insane sexual acts of showmanship in the first place as a way to protect himself from the unpredictable during vulnerable moments of intimacy. If you're tied up with a million knots, unable to move unless he releases you, ass up in the air, you're fully subdued and as such, under his command and not a threat.

― So, to conclude, generally, if asked about his favorite pose directly, Terry might legitimately give a cockily, arrogantly baffling answer in the form of him enjoying the, oh, I don't even know, Triple Lotus Heaven's Gate sex position he observed in Korea once upon a time during his training there and that one needs to be a Yoga expert, put in months of preparation and open all their chakras to even consider preforming it correctly, for all we know, but I tend to see this as a deflection, deliberate gatekeeping, manipulation and a defense mechanism on his part. A mask. A skin over a skin. Him seldom giving correct or genuine information about himself, and when he does, it is always with an agenda, the agenda here being that he is safeguarding his sensibilities and pathological fear of letting his guard down and ending up somehow fucked over due to it by immediately coming up with a sex pose entirely fabricated a la the Quicksilver method and just as painful to achieve for someone who even dares trying. Truth is, one can conclude Terry Silver is actually stupendously lonely, love starved, touchstarved, starved for acknowledgment, intimacy, true human connections, praise, suppressed and repressed in any and every way, and when in love, he can at times be...unexpectedly conventional. Meaning that, who is to say that him just being inside of you in any capacity, in any position, isn't already bliss by sheer default?

[vilonnie]

CYL 8 IS OUT!!!!!!!!!!

kind of disappointed with some of the choices this time. frobin and alfonse are especially meh :/ honestly I was really excited for alfonse specifically so it kind of sucks that it’s literally just gustavs clothes, I was hoping for something more creative although I think the unlikely possibilities of an askr or bruno alfonse would have also been cool

mortal savant felix is okay I guess. tbh im personally more into levin sword mortal savant lysithea but it’s whatever

also RIP to fem robin fans for him getting the sword instead. deranged. my sincerest condolences

yayyyyy bernie’s art is soooo good!!!! she seems powerful too, im definitely going to train her up into my emblem ike killer hehe :) sooo excited

PANETTE!!! might be bcause I don’t understand the implications of GHB as much but I’m actually really happy about a free panette! she’s one of my favorites, AND I was saving up for the solm banner anyway so this might mean I don’t have to spend as many orbs!!!! banners gotta come soon though I fucking need fogado. ok whatever. timerranette time… soon <3

[tobiasdrake]

Yuma's found his nerve.

Creed says you're supposed to be a lone wolf and rely on nobody. But hey, maybe the creed's full of shit. Maybe you should take it down and burn it as soon as you get back to the agen--

Oh, wait, Makoto already did that for us.

Thanks, brother-from-another-test-tube!

Just. Don't. Lose sight of the "to make everyone happy" clause of that. The truth doesn't necessarily make everyone happy in and of itself. Like all things, what matters most is what you do with it.

I think it's worth trying. Why don't you? Better to reach for the stars and fall short than to keep your feet on the ground and never strive for more.

The reveal that Mystery Phantom Yuma was Mystery Phantom Makoto all along is a clever twist. I like that.

It was a sitcom-esque Wacky Misunderstanding! I called that! I just thought he was going to be Real Yuma.

Also, fuck you and your adherence to the Great Man of History philosophy. I don't think either Yuma or Makoto can singlehandedly save Kanai Ward. But I have faith that Kanai Ward can save Kanai Ward.

Yuma: Yuma Kokohead quit to go make ramen! That means his name and identity can be mine now, for good! No backsies! Makoto: Wait, so you're forsaking the name and identity of Number One entirely? Yuma: You heard me. Makoto: Oh cool. That means we don't even need to fight anymore. I get to be Number One now, for good. Yuma: Wait, that's not what I-- Makoto: Ah ah ah, no backsies. Yuma: I'm not going to let you take over the WDO! Makoto: Be quiet, Yuma. I don't think a rookie detective should speak that way to his boss. Now go make me a pot of coffee!

Danganronpa's always struggled with making its climax feel intense. For a series that is essentially just people standing around talking at each other until they can figure out the solution, it's hard to give it that CLIMACTIC. ACTION. FEEL. How do you make a Final Boss Fight in a mystery-solver?

Ace Attorney runs into similar issues, having to strike a careful balance between dynamically fighting off an archvillain with words and oh my god when will it end why is he still going.

But here? Here, we get to punch the bad guy right in his fucking face.

It's a nice bit of escalation with some genuinely cool imagery.

That ultimately does little to disguise the fact that this fight is still just Yuma briefly summarizing the facts of the case, then smacking the facts with his sword to make them bean Makoto in the face.

Sounds fake but go on.

That sounds more believable. Makoto wanted to do all of this in the Mystery Labyrinth so that he could take another look at everything he's done and reassess himself and the decisions he's made. I can believe that. That sounds like a thing he'd do.

You took too much on yourself, man. That's the problem with the WDO's creed. It discourages cooperation.

As I've often said, there is no greater problem-solving resource than another human being. Kanai Ward doesn't need a Great Man of History to save it. It needs a chance to crowdsource a better solution.

I don't know what the answer is. I don't have a PHD in genetics or culinary arts. But someone might.

Hold up, are we talking about turning off the cloud generator right now? Because that's not the right answer. Definitely not.

Your options suck and I hate you. Let's do something else instead.

Oh shit, they really are going to make us choose. The metaphysics demand it.

I mean. Obviously we reap Makoto's soul. It's the only way to leave and it's not like it will matter anyway. It has been firmly established that homunculi can regenerate from soul-reaping. If the defective homunculi can do it then Makoto can too. This wouldn't kill him in any way that matters.

I don't want to kill Makoto. I think he has good intentions and just needs to learn to see past his own bullshit. Fortunately, this won't kill him so let's bounce!

I mean, it probably will actually perma-kill him despite violating the internal consistency of the game's metaphysics. Writers tend to forget what they've already established when they try to write these Cruel Choice conclusions. That same problem hit Life is Strange like a ton of brick with their poorly-conceived final choice.

But I choose to hold the game to what it's previously established. If soul-reaping could perma-kill homunculi then we wouldn't have seen Yakou and the other killers in the Restricted Area.

If your metaphysics will allow that, sure.

Yuma's coming around. Discarding emotion to reach a logical conclusion is a bad way of helping people.

My dude, idealism solves everything. No progress would ever been made if it weren't for idealistic fools believing it could be done. We wouldn't have planes today if some dipshit hadn't gone, "I'm gonna try to fly, and fuck you if you think I can't."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA YES

I did not think we'd actually get Yuma this far but he made it! Let's crowdsource this shit! In this complex moral debate between Yuma and Makoto, I fucking won!

This final chapter has been extremely validating for me. ^_^

[novantinuum]

(I thought tumblr had finally changed it so you can ask shit from a side blog. Arrrrrgh did I imagine it? Well this is fanfoolishness yet again regretting this being my goddamn main 😅)

Morganite - 45, 54

Tourmaline - 28, 35, 42

Jean - 22, 31

Thank youuu! Yeah ahah tumblr defo let you send in asks from side blogs before because I'm pretty sure I saw you celebrating this in a post once.

WEIRDLY SPECIFIC BUT HELPFUL CHARACTER BUILDING QUESTIONS

_

I'm once again gonna provide a visual for all these OCs ahah. I think I'm gonna have to do that from now on out, it's fun and probably helpful to people reading 'em.

Morganite- (I am forever obsessed with this shit-eating grin sketch I did of her)

45- What’s something unimportant / frivolous that they hate passionately?

I answered this one for Morganite on another ask, but I'm gonna give another, because she just has so much hate and disdain stored up in that gemstone, ahah-

I have a silly OC headcanon that half-Gem Jean Maverick ends up introducing the game of billiards to Gemkind at Little Homeschool. Well, a modified version of the game that's about scoring points for the most mathematically "sick AF" shots eventually ends up spreading like wildfire across the galaxy proper, and plenty of Morganite's lackeys are sucked into it, playing it constantly. Thus, she really, really fucking hates billiards. It's constantly distracting her troops from their duties. Yet another way that damned hybrid keeps thwarting her plans.

54- What’s their instinct in a fight / flight / freeze / fawn situation?

Oh, absolutely fight.

With the circumstances she's lived through (a viscous war, a life partner defecting to join rebels, one's diamond being shattered and having to be re-assigned and rebuild one's reputation under a new leader-) she's easily paranoid, and always wide alert. You really do NOT want to sneak up on her, or spring anything unexpected.

_

Tourmaline- (rebel Tourmaline is soooo my scrunklie)

28- What do they tell people they want? What do they actually want?

Courtier era Tourmaline tells people that she wants to be seen as the most intelligent, knowledgeable Gem in the room. Tourmalines are like... the bookkeepers, the ones who actually WRITE the history- at their Diamonds' behest, of course- and so it is their duty to be in the Know about everything happening around them at all times.

In reality though, all Tourmaline really wants is to make people laugh. To enjoy lasting conversation. To make an impression. For so, so many years, other Gems only saw her as like... a tool, a means to access knowledge, just a living repository for facts, but she wants people to gravitate to her because of who she IS, not what she can give.

35- What is the smallest morally questionable choice they’ve made?

The SMALLEST morally questionable choice? Well... hmm. I mean, she was a strategist in a war, so there were plenty of BIG morally questionable choices... but small?

Hmm.

The reason why these memes are so fun is that sometimes they inspire me to pull shit right out of my ass on the spot. Anyways, one day Tourmaline was sharpening her sword in Bismuth's forge at her permission and accidentally like, broke one of her tools.

She never fessed up to it, and eventually one of Bismuth's weapon smith apprentices gets blamed for it instead.

42- If invited to a TED Talk, what topic would they present on? What would the title of their presentation be?

Hmm...

"Rejuvenated, But By Choice This Time: How To De-program Yourself From Gem Society In Ten Easy Steps"

It's a comedy TED Talk about her own experience in defecting from Homeworld and joining the Crystal Gems that also ends up tackling some Real and Raw topics lol. Probably a talk you'd see given as part of some evening programing at Little Homeschool.

_

Jean Maverick- (I still eternally love this lovely art my friend @cynthi-arts did for me of them)

22- What simple activity that most people do / can do scares your character?

Eating food freely without having to scrounge over the nutrition labels to look at ingredients. Like damn, how do these people live?

The reason why is that Jean has a gluten intolerance- it's not... entirely so bad that it's a full-out allergy, but life is simply easier if they go to the effort of avoiding it as much as they can. This is a big reason why they always envied Gems growing up, in how they don't need to eat or drink or sleep to remain operational- just access to light.

Jean really wishes they weren't saddled down with this half-human bit a lot, suffice it to say. Surely everything would be sooo much easier if they were just a Gem. (So they believe.)

31- When do they feel the most guilt? How do they respond to it?

In the wake of drastic events that come far later, Jean ends up saddled with guilt in how they handled their first encounter with Morganite. They feel that Little Homeworld and Beach City wouldn't have come under such fire if they had acted more decisively that day- poofed her, perhaps, instead of simply cornering her to be ultimately led off in the custody of Homeworld reform officers.

Their way of dealing with all this stress and the needless what-ifs is by completely wearing themself to the bone around the clock in the manhunt for Morganite after her vicious attack on Little Homeworld/Beach City. Jean simply cannot rest until this loose end is tied up completely, and they will absolutely face negative bodily repercussions due to this.

[originalhomestuckscenarios]

Hi there, glad you liked Gamzee request

May I now ask for unsent letter from Dave to reader?

Dave and reader have their one year anniversary and Dave (being dork that he is) wrote a letter thanking them for sticking with him and showing him the beauty in the world. Only to back out last minute because 'What if this is too much?'. Reader and Dave are already pretty secure in relationship but the doubts never realy leave (know from experience).

Later reader finds the letter between some papers, possibly rap lyric written on them

Reader is rather easy going person with a lot of wisdom inside them (a bit like Uncle Iroh from atla if you're familiar). They like all kinds of music, dancing and other arts. They also have a appreciation for all kinds of wepons, their favourite being sword kind.

I have some troubles writing Dave's speech but I hope it's not too out of character...

ALSO Iroh is best character in Atla. I'm not gonna change my mind about it ever.

~

One year flew by like it was nothing. I guess the two of you are so cool the concept of time is having a hard time adjusting to your awesomeness. At first he didn't think that anniversary was important... But he suddenly had a lot of ideas for some dorky dates- which would be very fun and ironic to do.

Everything came down to him writing to you. You'd definitely like his sick writing skills, so obviously he can't rob you of that. Except he had no idea what he was doing.

After finishing the letter, Dave kept staring at it. With each read he felt less confident about it and started adding changes... But it ended up with him crossing a lot of it out. He eventually gave up and didn't really bother to dispose of it. It was just that worthless that it didn't deserve a proper throwing out. It was a dumb idea anyways- or so he thought.

You had a very sweet date on that occasion. After that you decided to chill at his place. You noticed piles of his rap lyrics and he said that you were more than welcome to read them.

Shuffling through the paper you see the letter. At first you thought he wanted you to find it but when you saw how many of it is crossed out... You knew he gave up on it. Regardless you read it.

Dear Y/N

I always thought it's cheesy to call your partner "dear" but right now I think you're very much dear to me and my younger self can suck it. I'm writing this letter to thank you, for everything. Woah it kinda sounds like I'm saying goodbye or something. That's not the case though I just don't think I say thank you enough and that's super fucking lame of me because you're amazing. You showed me a lot of great things in life and gave me support and advice when I needed it most. You're like the cool wise person everyone loves and adores. Like damn you sometimes make me look like a dork. Thanks to you it's been a great year. I hope there will be more cool moments we can share together and ironically be the cringe couple of lovebirds.

Again, thanks

Dave

You couldn't help but smile, and as he noticed that your reaction wasn't the one you'd have when reading a very sick lyric he wanted to know what was that about. The second the letter was brought to his attention he had some complaints to his past self about not at least putting it where you couldn't find them.

He didn't go back on his words within it but when you asked why he threw it away he said "I mean, I kinda wanted to try something else. Or at least put that thing in different words since this is embarrassing for no reason" and that was all he could say about it.

Just don't mention it to anyone okay?

[damazcuz]

but are you good at drawing hands and feet?

Hey blanket disclaimer that I'm a little sleep deprived right now and might be reading things wrongly. I don't mean to pick on you or anything and I'm halfway sure this isn't the angle you were trying to approach from so like. Don't take this as a personal sword slash to the chest and you're on fire, but I don't like the phrasing in relation to my post overall. I said I love doing it and that's all that I need. It's something I enjoy drawing. It's got some cool shapes and it's fun to figure out. I don't like framing hobbies and things that I enjoy as like... "Things I'm good at" (and therefore maybe I'm good enough to make it a side hustle, and I can turn a profit) vs "things I'm bad at" (and therefore I shouldn't do them as there's no incentive.) Again I'm pretty sure this isn't the angle you're approaching from, I just think that this is the capitalist societal pressure behind the angle you might be coming from which is still "are you good enough to actually do it (and profit) or bad enough you shouldn't." I think if they surveyed everyone in the world and had them vote and rank every artist ever based on how well they drew hands and I was named dead last, worst at drawing them ever, I would be like oh no! Anyway! And I'd still enjoy doing it because it's fun and I like to draw them. They got shapes cousin.

Again I'm very tired and possibly completely misreading tone and intention and it's hard to tell online (and still hard to tell in person) but I think we'll all be happier if we create things even when we fucking suck at them, you gotta go out there and make some reeeeeeeal stinkers. Just some real dogshit art sometimes. Do it for yourself and enjoy the process and the journey. :) But yeah I'm alright at em I think. They look good.