#anyway number 1 MC defender for life

[devilishdelights]

ever just want to team up with sol and kill the brothers i mean what

[aspiring-holistic-otaku]

Ramble#11

This month's episode we focus on Naoki Urasawa, a living manga legend, a true goat of the medium and my number 1 favourite mangaka. Ever since I started this podcast, at least one episode on him was inevitable and even if I don't stick the landing I hope this encourages someone to go check out and even support his brilliant pieces of art.

I'll be following the usual format of things read this month and then going over older reads, this time going from least to most favourite. Afterwards in what I'd call a part 2 I'll be doing a bit of off the cuff ranting.

So without further adieu, let's get into it!

Urasawa works read this month:

Asadora! (2018 - present with 37 english translated chapters):

A young girl named Asa has her home town destroyed by a Kaiju that only she saw. For those unfamiliar with the term Kaiju, it's basically the genre of film centered around giant monsters, think Godzilla. Anyways, years later, after training to be a pilot so she can track the monster down as she's its only living witness, she's approached by a certain organization that's been tracking the beast, so she can be trained to defend the country.

Not really a first time read but the first time I checked it out in 2020 there was only like 15/20 chapters out so with there being like twice that now I figured I could put it as new + bite me

Not much to say as again there's not that many chapters but it was my first time seeing a female lead from urasawa and I thought it was cool that the first page of the first chapter set the time frame for this world threatening disaster as 2020, which was when I picked it up and around the time COVID kicked off, even though that chapter itself came out in 2018.

Yawara! (1986 - 1993) 331 chapters total but only 92 in English:

Trained by her 8 time national judo champion grandad to get an Olympic gold, Yawara has been doing judo since she could walk. But as she enters the springtime of her youth, she just wants to be a regular, cute and fashionable girl.

Now I figure some of you may be wondering "What's the problem? Why can't she have both?". Well firstly, you know fiction, there's no story without conflict no matter how ridiculous. But as the mc would put it, judo just isn't cute!

She thinks she'll be unapproachable if she becomes known for grappling and throwing people around which tbh is fair but if you know anything about training to be an athlete, especially an Olympic level athlete, the time dedicated to training is no small thing. In the manga her grandad makes her train every day starting at 6am before she goes to school then after school they train again at 6pm.

Again not the very first time I read it, basically I started like a year ago but only read like 5 chapters then got upset that it wasn't fully translated. Cause I figured if it's been complete since 1993 and in 2022 there's only 92 chapters translated I'd be blue balling myself to hell with what I assumed would be another urasawa great (side note, more reason for learning Japanese so I can be a translator)

And I'm feeling bittersweet in being correct in my thinking because I really really dug it. Very neat aesthetic I've gotta say as urasawa plays up yawara trying to be cute and dressing up and so forth. It was also my first time seeing urasawa not doing mystery, as Yawara is a fun light-hearted slice of life but it still has a great cast of distinctive characters with brilliant dynamics just as I've come to expect from all of urasawa's works.

Master Keaton (1988 - 1994) 144ch:

I'm just gonna go with the final volume's description here as it's pretty spot on

When the wall that separated the East and West falls, the twentieth century comes to an end and brings radical changes to the world. During this turbulent time, Taichi Hiraga Keaton has difficulty finding a job in archaeology even though his long line of cases as an insurance investigator doesn't seem to end. As he navigates through dangerous adventures, Keaton encounters some bittersweet lives…

If you glazed over for a minute there, basically the mc loves archeology, wants to be a professor and have his own dig sites and such but because of skills he picked up in the army, he has much better luck being an investigator.

Great scenery, neat characters but pretty episodic to the point where I'd want to call it an anthology as characters don't really carry forward much. There's a lot of nitty gritty details about wars, factions and etc. around the world in that time period which can be a bit overbearing at times but that's what give the characters and situations the impact they would have gotten if they stuck around longer.

Also gotta say it's pretty educational, not just in the mc basically being macgyver and building self defense weapons out of whatever is on hand kinda way, but it takes a good look at Europe and how fucked it was during that cold war period as it indirectly and directly references many real world events. Maybe it's just my lack of exposure but I haven't seen that much media outside of documentaries really pinpoint Europe and the effects of war there and not on a large high level country scale, I mean like really looking at the lives of civilians and how they lived and died during that time.

Lots of variety, as I said it's very episodic as almost every chapter has a different subject ranging from finding a lost animal to settling spats between holocaust survivors or proving a statue is fake

I also have to mention something I've always appreciated about Urasawa's works that really stood out in Master Keaton for me and that's the diverse and well done racial representation. There's people from everywhere and it doesn't have that feel manga tends to have of like a Japanese person drawing what they think other people look like or something, it just looks like a person drawing other people, feel like I'm wording that weirdly but that's how I'm wording it.

Happy! (1993 - 1999) 254ch:

One day a high school girl, Miyuki Umino that takes care of her 3 younger siblings on her own, is approached by Yakuza who tell her that her older brother ran out on loans amounting to 250mill yen, approx. 1.8M USD) and now she needs to pay up or be sold into prostitution.

While wondering what to do she sees on the news a tennis player earned that amount in winnings so she decides that despite the difficulty she has to try.

Pretty dark premise and I'm telling you she goes through some dark shit but it's a great story, brilliant characters as usual, loveable idiots abound, antagonists that you can really really hate. You don't have to be a fan of tennis at all to appreciate the heartwarming n heart wrenching ups and downs. Teared up at least twice.

This was my favourite Naoki Urasawa work I read for the first time this month, this manga really showed me Urasawa really has THAT range fr.

Older Urasawa reads:

Monster (1994 - 2001) 162 chapters, this was my 3rd read:

A promising young doctor, Kenzo Tenma, ignores his superiors orders to operate on their mayor and instead operates on a young boy called Johan, that came in first, as he firmly believes all lives are equal. The mayor dies and the boy is saved but this leads to unfair treatment by his superiors and being left by his fiance. Soon after, not only does the young boy disappear but his superiors die from poisoning, leaving him, staff and ofc the police baffled.

10 years later during a string of serial killings, a key witness ends up being a patient of Tenma's but is killed for trying to reveal this by Johan, the real killer, now a young man who reappears in front of the doctor. Even more shockingly, he reveals himself as the one who killed Tenma's superiors all those years ago. Because of similarities in the murderers then and now, police pin it all on Tenma so he goes on the run across Europe to find the young man and clear his name.

Undeniably engaging from the jump, the ever building draw being who the fuck is this Johan dude? where'd he come from? why the fuck is he killing all these people? etc. etc.

Great side characters as usual with interactions that I can only call truly genuine whether they were sweet or sour.

There's a lot of nice interplay on the meanings of life and death, the notions of fear and hope, humanity and the inhumane, all weaved into every intricate thread of this story.

Not to be a hater but personally its relative popularity, as in relative to his other works, is a little upsetting. I get that it was his first critically acclaimed banger but he's done so much since then that isn't talked about enough for me. His later stuff not having anime adaptations doesn't help but if you've read and watched enough media adaptations in general you know that tends to mean diddly squat in terms of the quality of the source material . The industry unfortunately runs more and more on fan service every day.

Pluto (2003 - 2009) 65 chapters, read 3x:

The destruction of one of Earth's greatest robots and the murder of a leading figure in international robot rights seem unrelated at first, but both bodies were made into some bizarre collage with the central motif/pattern being a pair of horns placed by their heads, making them obviously related. The confusing thing is that the only thing that could destroy one of Earth's greatest robots is an even stronger robot, but could a robot really be related to the murder a human? Gesicht, a robot detective is put on the case and eventually comes to realize that all of Earth's greatest robots, himself included are being targeted.

As you can expect with any futuristic robot media there's an exploration of the concept of humanity vs the artificial but it's done so tenderly for lack of a better word and I'm not sure how often it's done that way in these noir type beats. Especially from the viewpoint of a robot mc.

I've probably said this for all his works so far but there's brilliant cast, great dialogue, great art that the context pretty much demanded and even though it's based on an arc in Osamu Tezuka's tetsuwan atom, better known as astro boy in the west, the greatest robot on earth arc to be specific, Urasawa really rose to and in my mind completely surpassed the challenge of adapting the work of he who is called the God of manga.

Also like man it's so crazy good for how short it is, please read this.

20th century boys (1999 - 2006) 249 chapters + 16 in the wrapup sequel 21st century boys, I've read both 2x:

The story follows a group of childhood friends, now adults who are trying to patch together their memories in an effort to uncover a conspiracy that seems to be based on games they used to play about saving the world from destruction.

It's pretty difficult to describe the events of the story further but it definitely stands out in my mind as the grandest scale of anything Naoki Urasawa has ever done though I wouldn't put it past him to go further.

As I said the story follows friends trying to patch together memories so the time period goes back and forth quite a bit. It can be pretty jarring trying to follow it strictly by year so I'd recommend just thinking about it in three tone periods, namely; childhood, present day and miscellaneous flashbacks. Separating childhood from miscellaneous flashbacks as their childhood remains within a constant range but as the story moves forward and present day changes so does the range of flashbacks they have.

That should hint a bit at the scale of this whole thing but outside of the breadth, there's a depth of characterization and dynamic that I haven't seen elsewhere.

Side note, if the length is frightening it's the type of read I'd recommend savouring anyways.

Billy Bat (2008 - 2016) 165chapters, this is my 4th time reading this:

A Japanese American mangaka/cartoonist, Kevin Yamagata, suddenly has his workspace taken over by police claiming they're investigating one of his neighbours for being a Soviet spy. In the middle of protesting this, one of the officers sees the comic he's working on, Billy Bat. He says he's seen it before in Japan, basically calling Kevin's work a copy. Kevin takes offence but admits he was stationed in Japan for some time and may have seen it and subconsciously copied it. As one of the lasting lessons his father taught him was that you can't steal people's stuff, he goes to Japan to seek out this potential original creator.

The story unfolds as he meets an artist that tells him the bat is actually something passed down throughout history, throwing him right into the middle of several conspiracies concerning real key incidents throughout modern history.

On top of everything, the bat starts talking to him, urging him to find a supposedly important and immensely powerful scroll.

My favourite piece from urasawa, brilliant in every respect, please please please please read this.

That's it for this first part, if you're still here, thanks for listening, please please read these, urasawa is a goat, a legend a phenomenon.

Just to share some resources before I go into the part 2 bit which may have spoilers irdk yet, there were two YouTube videos I really liked that I highly recommend.

The first was 'The greatest mangaka of all time' by the masked man and second was 'A guide to manga's greatest master' by the omnibus collector.

The first video is about 10 minutes long and uses the quality of Monster, 20th century boys, Pluto and Billy Bat as their rationale for why Naoki Urasawa is the greatest mangaka of all time.

The second is 20 minutes and pretty much covers Naoki's entire career and body of work, giving pretty rad descriptions of all his pieces, inspirations for them and a bunch of other really neat info. Bonus For those of you who are int that sort of thing, they also show the physicals they own off all the manga they talked about. really appreciated that. thank you omnibus collector.

Really appreciated these videos as most animanga fans and discussions focus on monster, sometimes 20th century boys and rarely anything past that unless they're ranking which I'm really not interested in.

There's also a third video I mention in part 2 of the episode I'll link here as well.

Anyways thanks again for listening, stay hydrated and listen in for some rambles if you're also into that kind of thing.

[bananasher1337]

sorry for spam liking/reblogging. if you find my blog through there, mmm posts good.

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please wipe your feet on the mat.

anyway, onto me. i’m an ugly pissy nerd. i draw things (if they're pleasant or meaningful, or not, that's for you to decide), and i use this site once a month. i’m the guy who makes terrible animation memes and shitposts on youtube.

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do NOT involve me in discourse EVER. i dont care what it is. idgaf what somebody else is doing with their own life that doesn't affect me or anyone else at all.

[o-pandora-o]

Brothers in the Human Realm

No one was a demon to begin with (maybe luci though but-). You meet the brothers as human in the human realm. How would you meet them?

Lucifer:

Apparently some schoolmate of yours have done some violations in the school grounds and they used your name

You were sent to the Principal's office where you were questioned by Principal Diavolo about your wrong doings

You were trying to defend your innocence, but it was no avail

Coincidentally Lucifer was just dropping paperwork to Diavolo

Lucifer is your strict and scary and handsome college professor

He overheard the conversation and he defended you since he knew that you weren't lying

"Mr. Diavolo I must say, MC is one of my exceptional students, they would not do something as idiotic as that, and I clearly observe the behavior of my students"

Your H E R O

The next day, someone gave Principal Diavolo evidence of those who did wrong

Your name was cleared

Apparently you saw Lucifer giving those schoolmates detention, threat, and punishment. You may or may not seen a hint of killing intent in his eyes

You decided to thank Lucifer

"No worries, I just clearly observe the actions of what is mine"

H O L D U P

"Wha-" you replied

"Ah MC I have to go to my next class, take care"

Mammon:

Is a famous model, often the cover and centerfold of the monthly Majolish

For you Mammon was okay? I mean he is famous and many people likes his face

You were going to buy a limited edition  sunglasses that have hint of yellow and orange

You went to a sunglass store and asked the attendant if they they still have it but apparently the one on the display is their only stock

You decided to buy it

Apparently, Mammon also came to that specific sunglasses store looking for sunglasses that is the same as the one you bought

"I'm sorry sir, but apparently it was already bought and we have no stock" the attendant said

"Who bought it?"

"They did, sir" the attendant said as they point to you

"Oi! Can I buy the sunglasses from you? I'll pay double, no one can refuse the great Mammon"

"I'm sorry but I have to refuse. I really wanted it." you said

"Don't you know who I am? I'm-"

"The Great MAMMON, who is a famous model and often seen on Majolish magazine" you cut him off. "R-right! Now can i buy-"

"Nope sorry" you replied as you rushed to the exit

"Oi! What's your name? And contact details" he asked

"the name is MC, thats all you can get from me" you said as you rushed to the crowd

He was swarmed by the number of fans who saw him

He managed to find you and he chats you "Can I buy the sunglasses now?"

In the end it wasn't just sunglasses you talked about, you also talked about his struggle of being a model and your life

Leviathan:

Your username DestructoSheep is well known in the realms of Obey them

You always rank 2nd in pop quizzes

However no matter what you try, you can never beat your enemy, L3v1

Today, you got a letter from obey them, acknowledging the top players and giving them limited edition items

Ofc you have to go (there are limited items after all)

So you arrived early at the meetup place, no one was there yet so you played some obey them

A purple haired male entered the room, he looked fidgety, nervous, and he was mumbling something about normies

Cue giving of merch

The purple haired male tripped on the tiles and he dropped his phone in front of you

You helped him up and picked up his phone only to see his player name is L3v1.

"You.... You are L3v1." you sai

"Y-Yeah?W-Why?" he said as he was going to grab his phone away from you

"Waaaah! I'm DestructoSheep nice to meet you, oh but you can call me MC" you said as you reached his hand for a handshake

"I-uhhh I'm sorry I'm not used to touching, thats very normie-ish" he said as he averted his eyes

"My name is Leviathan, levi for short"

"I've always thought that the top player is always prideful and such but here he is being shy" you said as you chuckled

"H-hey! I'm still the best one in obey them mind you! I got every event cards at lvl 150 and skill lvl 10 and-"

"Yeah yeah I know" you said

After both of you received the merch, you both talked nonstop about obey them, other games, and anime

It was more like Levi bragging the amount of games and anime he played and watched

It was almost dusk till both of you notice the time

"Ah i got to go early, need to cook dinner. Chat me sometime!!!" you said as you gave him your contact details

Expect no sleep cuz both of you kept chatting till dawn

Satan:

He saw a kitty in a box in an alleyway near his apartment

Everyday, he often stops by to give the kitty enough food for the day

Is often disgusted by the fact that most people dump their pets in trash because they don't have anything to feed it

Saw you going to the alleyway

He suspected the worst and he thought that you were gonna harm the kitty he was feeding

"Hey don't harm-" he stopped

He saw you feeding the kitty

"Ah I assume you thought that I was gonna harm it?" you asked

"Well I thought the worst, humans are naturally scum anyways, but even so I do apologize"

"Ah it's alright, it's not a big deal anyways" you replied

"You come here often? I mean to feed the kitten that is" he asked

"You can say that, but not as often as you do" you said

"How did you know?did you perhaps-"

"Ah I happened to saw you feeding the kitten, I was just shy to approach you" you said

"Well I come to believe that people who are close to cats are not necessarily bad"

"I have to say I have to agree" you replied

"Ah I have to go, let's chat here again next time" you added

The alleyway became your meeting place to chitchat about cats

Asmodeus:

The famous M.A.D. Company released a new and limited edition Devil Set makeup and you were dying to get a hold of one

You spent a day looking at different stores but it was either unavailable or sold out. However, you were lucky to find another store that has one last stock.

You didn't notice someone else was also going to get it and so both of you grabbed the last set

"Uh... I'm sorry I have been looking this for the whole day, may I have it?" you politely asked

"Awww sweetie, I have been doing the same thing! Can you be a dear and let go of it?" the male with champagne-colored hair replied

Cue 1 hour of both of you saying "let go" or "it's mine"

"I have an idea! Let's just buy the set and divide it" you said

"Ohh! Good thinking! I will take the lippies, Devil shadow palette and the foundation!"

"That's literally EVERYTHING IN THE SET"

Cue two more hours of bickering.

Both of you didn't notice someone took it while the two of you are bickering

You noticed that it was gone

"Um... Someone already bought it while you two were... fighting" the saleslady explained

Both of you left the store empty handed and sad and you decided to break the atmosphere

"Pffft I'm sorry for fighting because of a Makeup set, btw my name is MC" you said

"I'm also sorry dear, although I wanted it I still didn't get it. I even missed my appointment to the salon!"

"And my name is Asmodeus, perfect name for a perfect being!" Asmo added

"Alright Mr 'Perfect' " you rolled your eyes

Let's just say that both of you talked about makeups on your way home.

Beelzebub:

Beel is your classmate during Physical Education class at college

Is a famous football player in your campus and he is also known for his handsomeness

His practice hours were often morning to late lunch and late lunch til dusk

During late lunch you saw him in the cashier by the cafeteria, asking if they still have cheeseburger available

But to his dismay, the cashier said "I'm sorry you already bought the last cheeseburger, and that's the last quota for the day"

He seemed sad and still hungry

You still have a cheeseburger to eat, but when you saw the time you knew you weren't gonna make it on your next class

When no one was looking, you decided to approach Beel and gave him your cheeseburger

"Are you giving this to me?"

"Yeah, I was going to eat it but I don't have much time for my next class" you replied

"Thanks, I owe you one"

You saw how happy he was when he got the cheeseburger

You were shocked how fast he ate it

Did he like inhale it or something

After your class, you noticed that he texted you saying "Thanks for the cheeseburger, I'll repay you next time you get hungry"

Let's just say you both got closer after that

Belphie:

It's your first day of online class, and your first subject has a 4 hour lecture

You forgot to disconnect your meeting link and you didn't notice until you were about to do homework

As you were about to disconnect, you saw that you weren't alone and you're classmate is still connected

You didnt want to leave him so you tried your best for your classmate to notice you. You tried spamming and saying " hello"

After 1234 attempts he finally noticed you

"Ah I'm sorry I slept during the boring lecture, thanks for waking me up"

"Ah it's no problem" you replied

"My name is Belphegor as you can see, but you can call me Belphie"

"My name is MC" you replied

"Say... How are you still here after hours after the lecture?"

"I forgot to disconnect" you replied

"Uh idk if this is too much of a favor to ask, can you wake me up again next time? After lecture that is, I don't want to be late for other classes"

"Sure, I don't mind I guess" you replied

After that, both of you got to know each other and you forgot to do your homework and you became a personal alarm clock

[tiramisiyu]

【未定事件簿】 Tears of Themis: Main Story 7-34 Translation

Translation Masterlist | Video

Chapter 7 – Rains of Monte Cristo: 7-1 / 7-3 / 7-5 / 7-7 / 7-9 / 7-11 / 7-13 / 7-15 / 7-17 / 7-19  ♦️ ♦️  7-20 / 7-22 / 7-24 / 7-26 / 7-28 / 7-30 / 7-32 / 7-34 / 7-35

Content Warning: This section contains topics that may be uncomfortable to some readers (mentions of abuse). Please proceed with discretion.

✼ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✼

After we left Hang Jiahe’s place, Xu Yin hastened off. No one knew what she was thinking, and all she left was a staggering silhouette.

When we returned to Marius’ car, we hadn’t recovered from the confrontation with Hang Jiahe either, so we sunk into silence. I subconsciously realized that Marius seemed… somewhat sad?

MC: Marius, are you okay?

Marius: … You noticed.

MC: If something’s troubling you, tell me. Don’t keep it pent up inside.

Marius: …

Marius: I keep thinking back these days on what Wang Chunchong said to me…

Marius: When I heard Hang Jiahe’s story, I suddenly… felt a little scared…

MC: Scared?

Marius: Yeah. I live in the same world as Xu Yin, Wang Chunchong, and Hang Jiahe.

Marius: But I’m luckier than them, as my brother and dad both love me – so I’ve got a happy family overall.

Marius: So I don’t have to climb up, step by step the way Xu Yin and Wang Chunchong have to, just to live.

Marius: And I definitely am not like Hang Jiahe, who couldn’t even choose her own life.

Marius: But all of what I have right now is built on the foundation of Pax and the von Hagen family.

Marius: As the von Hagen stands at the very summit, we have no problems whatsoever.

Marius: But if one day, all of this were gone, could I still be this happy?

Marius: Would my day still come?

MC: Of course it will.

Marius: Why?

MC: Because whether day comes or not isn’t determined solely by the outside world.

MC: Like this.

I took out my phone and turned on the flashlight.

Instantly, a thin white light cut through the air, lighting up the dark interior of the car.

MC: Even if one is in the middle of the darkness, if you can find a light, even if it’s the thinnest, weakest sliver…

MC: It can still light up the darkness.

MC: Hang Jiahe’s story is a tragedy from top to bottom. No one could find the light to save themselves in the darkness.

MC: But unlike them, you are a light yourself.

MC: Even if you discard the halo of Pax and the von Hagen family, your own light can illuminate darkness.

Marius: …

Marius looked at me quietly, his eyes glittering in the weak light.

Marius: Jiejie, you’re right, but… not completely right.

MC: What?

Marius: Not only can I emit light, but I’ve also found the light that can illuminate me.

MC: !!!

MC: …

Marius: …

MC: … A-anyways, Marius, about what Hang Jiahe said at the end…

Seeing the atmosphere in the car get stranger and stranger, I rushed to change the topic.

Marius: Though I don’t want to admit it, I do think she’s right.

Marius: It’s impossible for us to incriminate her with the evidence we have now.

MC: But the police haven’t found out anything, and Hang Jiahe wears gloves, so she wouldn’t have left fingerprints…

MC: There’s no way for us to prove that she was the one to use the hammer…

Marius: …

Marius: No, we might have a way.

✼ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✼

Waiting Room

Very appropriately, it was raining in Stellis on the day of the trial for Hang Fei and Qi Yu’s case. I arrived at the meeting room early, preparing to reread all my materials, so I could better face this trial where odds were winning were pretty low.

MC: (Only Marius would have come up with this method…)

✼ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✼

[Flashback]

Darius Morgan: You want Hang Jiahe herself to admit everything she did in court?

Marius: Yes, that’s the most effective method I can think of right now.

MC: But… how does that work…

MC: …

MC: Are you thinking of imitating the psychological tactics I used against Fannie before in court?

Marius nodded.

MC: But Hang Jiahe’s not like Fannie, so how do we get at her?

Marius: About that… do you remember what we went to her house and you noticed that her glove had broken?

MC: “Looks like this glove design quality isn’t that great either, since it broke on me without me realizing…”

MC: “I’ll look for more durable designs.”

MC: You mean that Hang Jiahe might have accidentally left fingerprints or other clues?

Marius: Yes.

MC: That is possible, but this might not necessarily be of any use against her.

Marius: I got in touch with the production factory of that toolbox. Though the number’s carved on the hammer’s iron core…

Marius: The same number is also secretly carved on the handle, and only the factory itself can identify it.

Marius: They did this to prevent people from making fakes – kind of a trade secret.

Marius: I found out about it thanks to some connections.

MC: Thanks for your hard work.

Marius: No big deal – anyways, back on topic.

Marius: We can send the murder weapon to the factory for confirmation. If all goes as planned…

Marius: Assuming that the number on the core and the handle don’t match, Captain Morgan, we’ll have to trouble you to re-examine the murder weapon again.

Marius: Though this time, what we need to identify are any residues or biological indices on it.

MC: You suspect that there are Hang Jiahe’s fingerprints on the murder weapon?

Marius: Yes.

Darius Morgan: But, Marius, putting aside whether we can even get this examination in before trial…

Darius Morgan: With how much time has passed, it’s highly unlikely that any residues are left, even if they existed back then.

Marius: I know. It’s just…

MC: Captain Morgan… we can only stake our bets on this.

Darius Morgan: And what if we come up empty?

MC: Then I will still confront Hang Jiahe in court with all the truths I have until the final moment.

Darius Morgan: You probably understand that if you fail, we might never catch Hang Jiahe again.

MC: I understand, but I’m sure our effort will display results. I will not give up if we haven’t reached the end yet.

Marius: Captain Morgan, I’m also requesting this of you.

Darius Morgan: … I understand.

Darius Morgan: Within the scope of law, I will do my best to have Wang Chunchong stand in court as the suspect. As for the rest…

He smiled at me.

Darius Morgan: It’s all on you.

[Flashback end]

✼ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✼

As he promised, Darius dealt with everything after.

MC: (My emotions are a mess… I don’t even know what to say right now…)

MC: (I’ll go through the files again.)

I sunk back into case-file reading. In the middle of that, Marius pushed open the door with a bag full of breakfast.

Marius: You arrived so early.

MC: Yeah, I wanted to go through the information once more before appearing in court, just to ensure that I’m fully prepared.

Marius: Don’t be so nervous, eat your breakfast first.

MC: Thanks.

Marius: No problem. Oh, right, Captain Morgan had me give you this.

Marius handed me a document.

Marius: This is the information Captain Morgan got when they were investigating Hang Jiahe’s alibi.

Marius: There are blind spots in the villa’s surveillance – Hang Jiahe probably used them to come and go from it.

Marius: The police are currently looking for any witnesses around that area.

Marius: Aside from that, the two identical toolboxes were ones that Hang Jiahe bought around January 25th.

Marius: Wang Chunchong was also in the apartment during then. She probably used the opportunity when she said she returned home to get clothes…

Marius: To get the hammer handle with Wang Chunchong’s fingerprints.

MC: Understood.

[Obtained Police’s Investigation Report]

Marius: Also, this is the examination report that the police currently have on the murder weapon.

Marius: The factory confirmed that the murder weapon’s handle is indeed from set No. 22, and the other thing we guessed…

Marius flipped to the second page of the report, where it was clearly written “No results currently regarding residues or biological indices.”

MC: (Looks like we can’t tell whether there are fingerprints on it for now…)

MC: …

Marius: Hold onto this report.

MC: Okay.

Marius: Alrighty, take your time eating, then. I won’t bug you anymore.

Marius: In court, just do what you want – don’t be too nervous.

Marius: Everything will go well.

MC: Yep.

Marius left with a smile. I looked at that examination report, making a silent decision.

MC: (I’ll proceed with all I have!)

✼ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✼

CRIMINAL COURT

10:00 AM

Judge: Court is in session. The court calls the People of Stellis versus suspect Wang Chunchong for the homicide case of Hang Fei and Qi Yu.

Judge: First, may the prosecution give their opening statement.

Prosecutor: I represent the People of Stellis against Wang Chunchong.

Prosecutor: On the night of January 28th, Hang Fei and Qi Yu, residents of Yaofu Community, were murdered at home. Their corpses were found not long ago.

Prosecutor: Investigation revealed that Wang Chunchong had severe conflicts with the victims due to a betrothal gift issue.

Prosecutor: That night, Wang Chunchong took food items laced with special drug G24D into the victims’ house under the pretext of apologizing.

Prosecutor: After he led the victims to eat the food, Hang Fei and Qi Yu fell unconscious due to the drug.

Prosecutor: The suspect took this opportunity to move the victims to the floor and used a hammer in the room to deal lethal blows to their heads.

Prosecutor: After, the suspect brought the bodies to his home using the apartment’s special fire escape route and placed them inside suitcases.

Prosecutor: After the suspect went to the natural park’s back mountain, then buried the bodies and the murder weapon.

Prosecutor: Investigation revealed Wang Chunchong’s fingerprints on the murder weapon, as well as the DNA of the victims in the suitcases in his home.

Prosecutor: The surveillance cameras where the burial location was clearly recorded Wang Chunchong’s entrance and exit.

Prosecutor: Thus, the prosecution believes that Wang Chunchong had full motive for the crime and that the evidence is conclusive.

Judge: Does the defendant have any objections regarding the prosecution’s statement?

Wang Chunchong: I didn’t kill Hang Fei and Qi Yu! It wasn’t me!

MC: I believe that there are major flaws in the prosecution’s evidence chain. The true culprit of this case is Hang Jiahe, not Wang Chunchong!

MC: First, the natural park’s surveillance footage only recorded Wang Chunchong’s movements at the park’s front door.

MC: It is impossible to judge where he went after entering the park. Thus, this evidence is untenable.

 PROSECUTION OBJECTION

Prosecutor: Objection! As the defense lawyer believes that it is impossible to determine that Wang Chunchong went to bury the bodies based on the natural park door’s surveillance…

Prosecutor: The prosecution also believes that it is impossible to determine that Wang Chunchong did not bury the bodies.

Prosecutor: Thus, the prosecution believes that Wang Chunchong is still highly suspect of performing post-murder corpse disposal.

 OBJECTION

MC: Objection! The defense has evidence to prove that Wang Chunchong did not go to bury bodies that night.

 Select: Recording of Simon’s murder

MC: That night, Wang Chunchong went to the natural park to meet Simon on the north mountain.

MC: This recording indicates when Wang Chunchong murdered Simon, which is the same time as what happened in the park.

MC: Thus, Wang Chunchong could not have been simultaneously discarding the corpses at the same time at the foot of the mountain.

MC: Simon’s murder case is an essential part of this case.

MC: Hang Jiahe knew of Wang Chunchong’s plan to murder Simon, and thus chose the same day to murder Hang Fei and Qi Yu.

MC: Only in this way could she successfully frame Wang Chunchong.

Prosecutor: Defense lawyer, what evidence do you have that proves that Hang Jiahe knew of Wang Chunchong’s plan?

 Select: Wang Chunchong’s Recording Pen

MC: Wang Chunchong murdered Simon because Tyson requested it of him.

MC: And Hang Jiahe was the one who introduced Wang Chunchong to Tyson.

MC: Hang Jiahe, Tyson, and Wang Chunchong were all aware of when and where Simon was to be murdered.

 PROSECUTION OBJECTION

Prosecutor: Objection! The defense lawyer claims that Hang Jiahe was the one who murdered Hang Fei and Qi Yu.

Prosecutor: But according to investigation, Hang Jiahe, Hang Fei, and Qi Yu were a happy family.

Prosecutor: And the relationships that Hang Jiahe had with her adoptive parents were excellent.

Prosecutor: She has no motive to commit the crime.

 OBJECTION

MC: Objection! Hang Jiahe does have motive to commit the crime, and it is stronger than Wang Chunchong’s.

 Select: Hang Jiahe’s Hidden Video Records

MC: During the ten-plus years Hang Jiahe was fostered in the Hang family, she suffered inhuman abuse at the hands of her foster father.

MC: This damaged her physiological health and ruined her life.

MC: Thus, Hang Jiahe hates all those who pushed her into the depths.

MC: This does not only include Hang Fei and Qi Yu, but it also includes her biological parents Xu Yin and Tyson, as well as her fiancé Wang Chunchong.

MC: Judge, I request Hang Jiahe’s appearance in court.

Judge: A reasonable request. Summon Hang Jiahe to court.

Hang Jiahe: I did hate those people who made living even worse than death for me, but I never murdered anyone.

Hang Jiahe: Also, when the murder occurred, I was not in the apartment. I have an alibi.

 OBJECTION

MC: Objection! Within the time that the crime occurred, you did return to the apartment.

Hang Jiahe: Oh? Do you have proof?

Select: January 28 Apartment Full-Day Surveillance Footage

MC: This is the full-day surveillance footage the day the crime happened.

MC: Based on big data lab analysis, comparison, and person-eye identification, Hang Jiahe appeared for a total of 6 times in the footage.

MC: Individually, these times are: 12pm, 7pm, 8pm, 9pm, 9:45pm, and 10:15pm.

MC: The reason why she was repeatedly entering and exiting the apartment was to complete her alibi.

 PROSECUTION OBJECTION

Prosecutor: Objection! According to the forensics identification results, Hang Fei and Qi Yu died on the 28th after 10pm.

Prosecutor: With Hang Jiahe’s physique and strength, it would be impossible to have moved and struck the bodies, then cleaned the scene, within 15 minutes.

 OBJECTION

MC: Objection! Hang Fei and Qi Yu did not die on the 28th after 10pm.

MC: They died after 12:30pm that day.

 PROSECUTION OBJECTION

Prosecutor: Objection! The victims’ surmised time of death was determined by forensics experts. Defense lawyer, do not speak without grounds.

 OBJECTION

MC: Objection! The bodies of Hang Fei and Qi Yu had undergone severe decay. When forensics determined the time of death, aside from basing it on the corpses’ anatomical analysis…

MC: They also based it on the victims’ final movements and the surveillance footage of the apartment on the 28th.

MC: In the footage, Qi Yu last appeared at 9:45pm, but the Qi Yu that appeared was not the real Qi Yu.

MC: Instead, it was Hang Jiahe in disguise.

 PROSECUTION OBJECTION

Prosecutor: Objection! A security guard saw Qi Yu who appeared in the grand lobby at 9:45pm, so she could not have been another person in disguise.

 OBJECTION

MC: Objection! The Qi Yu that the security guard saw was wearing a face mask and hat, so he could not have seen her full face.

Prosecutor: Even so, the hammer responsible for the murder of Hang Fei and Qi Yu had Wang Chunchong’s fingerprints on them. Defense lawyer, how do you explain this?

MC: That was because Hang Jiahe had switched out a part of the murder weapon.

Prosecutor: Defense lawyer, what proof do you have?

 Select: Hammer Photo

MC: The hammer that served as the murder weapon is a dual-purpose hammer.

MC: With similar models, one can switch out the handle while leaving the iron core.

MC: Hang Jiahe used this fact, switching the handle she owned with Wang Chunchong’s fingerprints on them onto the murder weapon.

 PROSECUTION OBJECTION

Prosecution: Objection! All mentioned methods are merely the defense lawyer’s conjectures, with no evidence to support them.

 OBJECTION

MC: Objection! I do have evidence!

 Select: Police’s Examination Report

MC: According to investigation, the set No.22 toolbox in Hang Jiahe’s house and the set No.21 toolbox in Room 1001…

MC: Were both purchased by Hang Jiahe.

MC: Why else would she buy two of the same toolboxes, if not to switch the hammer handles?

Hang Jiahe: You’ve spoken so much, but do you have any evidence that directly proves that I killed them?

Hang Jiahe: If not, then everything you’ve said is just a made-up story.

MC: I do…

I looked at Hang Jiahe, sighing deeply. This moment had finally come.

MC: Just in case, we applied for another examination of the murder weapon, especially the handle portion.

MC: This is the examination report that the police gave.

I took out the last examination report that Marius gave me, showing it for all in court to see.

MC: In this report, we noticed a vital piece of evidence.

Hang Jiahe: What evidence?

MC: The production factory confirmed that the No.21 hammer, the murder weapon, had the forgery-preventing No.22 carved in its handle.

MC: Based on this, we requested that any residues and biological indices on the murder weapon to be examined, and…

I stopped speaking and looked towards Hang Jiahe.

Hang Jiahe: What are you looking at?

MC: Miss Hang, are your gloves alright today? They haven’t split again, have they?

Hang Jiahe: W-what are you saying this for?

MC: No major reason. It’s just that you seemed somewhat troubled about this when we met before.

Hang Jiahe: Of course I’d get angry over my gloves breaking. Can’t I?

MC: Of course you can. But, Miss Hang, have you experienced your gloves breaking on you before?

Hang Jiahe: W-what are you trying to say?

Hang Jiahe’s originally calm face grew agitated, and a bead of sweat slid down her neck.

MC: Nothing, I’m just asking a question. This shouldn’t be a hard-to-answer question.

Hang Jiahe: Whether it has or hasn’t, does this have anything to do with the case?

MC: Whether it has or hasn’t isn’t for you to decide.

MC: But since you’ve said this, I’ll ask you some questions that are more related to the case.

I grasped the file in my hand tight, looked straight at Hang Jiahe, and added some emphasis to my words.

MC: Miss Hang, why did you return so many times to the apartment on the night of the crime?

MC: Why did you buy toolboxes of the same model before the murder?

Hang Jiahe: I… I…

MC: Also, why did these toolboxes just happen to appear in yours and the victims’ homes?

MC: Why are so many coincidences tied to you?

MC: Hang Jiahe, how do you explain this?

Hang Jiahe: No… no way, my fingerprints couldn’t have been on the hammer!

Hang Jiahe looked at me, her eyes gradually growing fiercer.

Hang Jiahe: I clearly confirmed it so many times when I was switching the handle and killing those two beasts.

Hang Jiahe: I shouldn’t have gotten anything wrong, so why did something still slip through?

MC: So, Hang Jiahe, you admit that you did murder Hang Fei and Qi Yu?

Hang Jiahe: So what if I did? It’s Hang Fei’s fault for running into my room that night and raising a hand against me again!

Hang Jiahe: I’ve had enough! I won’t give him another chance to humiliate me as he pleases!

MC: Then why did you murder Qi Yu?

MC: She never stopped Hang Fei? Before, she clearly…

Hang Jiahe: Qi Yu… hah, she did try to stop him that night, but she should have tried long ago!

Hang Jiahe: She’s been a bystander for so many years!

Hang Jiahe: They should both go to hell together!

✼ ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ✼

Judge: Per court trial, the prosecution’s accusations against Wang Chunchong lack evidence and are untenable.

Judge: Simultaneously, multiple pieces of evidence indicate high suspicion against Hang Jiahe in this case.

Judge: Defense lawyer, it seems that your guesses were all correct, and the risks you took this time were all quite interesting.

Judge: Leave the rest of the work to the criminal investigation department.

Judge: Court is adjourned!

[cheri-translates]

[CN] Gavin’s Basketball Court Date (Eng Translation)

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

Note: This is a cancelled date which will unlikely come to EN :’(

More from this Collection: Kiro // Lucien // Victor

The date begins with MC in the gym. She comments that it’s usually fully packed, and today is no exception. While leaving, she coincidentally meets Gavin at the entrance. 

He offers to send her home (even though he just arrived lol). He also invites her to join him for outdoor sports next time.

MC: Sure, but what are we going to do? A night run? Or our usual running?

Gavin: Let’s do something different. I’ll teach you basketball.

Basketball?!

This term leaves me shocked, and I suddenly feel like fleeing…

Even though getting smacked by the ball was something that happened back in high school, just the memory of it leaves me feeling faint.

It is nothing but a shadow of life.

MC: …but I have no idea how to play basketball...

Gavin: It’s okay, exercising is the main point.

MC: …

Gavin: Don’t worry, I’m here.

I look towards Gavin, his eyes carrying with it assurance, as though calling me to trust him.

MC: Mm… I’ll give it a try then! …don’t make fun of me if I play badly!

Gavin: Of course I wouldn’t. Are you free this weekend? I can pick you up.

I nod, agreeing to a date that I am both anticipating yet slightly worried about.

-

On Saturday afternoon, Gavin and I head to the outdoor court in Central Park. Although it is still morning, the courts already have quite a number of people.

I take in my surroundings and discover that most of the people consist of school boys, their movements bursting with energy. The sheer number of basketballs flying around the courts leave me shocked, and I unconsciously shirk backwards.

Gavin: What’s wrong?

MC: …I don’t know how to play basketball…

I lower my head and stare at my sport shoes, unable to say the five words: “I am afraid of basketball”.

Gavin hands me the ball.

Gavin: I picked up basketball late, and only started in Junior High.

MC: ?

Gavin: Back then, I was quite short so the seniors made fun of me. A year later, they couldn’t win against me.

I’m left flabbergasted. Minor mentioned that Gavin is amazing at basketball, but I didn’t expect to hear such a story behind it.

Although Gavin only gave me a brief summary, I know that he must have gone through a lot, and put in much effort during that one year.

Gavin: MC, enjoying the process of exercising is more important than anything else.

There is a smile on Gavin’s face.

He… must really like basketball. I can almost imagine him in the court, playing to his heart’s content.

Realising how much Gavin likes basketball, it no longer seems that frightening.

I muster my courage and pat the basketball, crinkling my eyes into a smile.

MC: A goal of mine today is to throw the ball through the hoop once! I’m going to trouble Coach Gavin to teach me from now onwards!

Gavin freezes for a moment.

Gavin: All right.

Gavin does a simple dribbling demonstration. It’s as though the basketball can understand his every command, remaining entirely in Gavin’s control.

I take a deep breath, deciding not to care about the flying basketballs around me. I focus on learning how to dribble the ball.

My current standard limits me to dribbling the ball in position. With a slight movement of my foot, the ball rolls away…

MC: I didn’t think dribbling the ball would be so difficult…

Gavin: There’s no rush, I’ll help to correct your movements.

I nod, cheering myself on once again.

Although my posture is awkward and odd, it seems like… basketball isn’t that scary after all…

Standing beside me, Gavin rests his hand on the small of my back.

Gavin: Relax a little more, your movements can’t be too stiff.

The warmth from his palm seeps through the thin material of my sports outfit, finding its way onto my skin.

It is only now that I realise how close we are. Just a slight lean of my head is enough to make contact with his face.

His eyebrows are bathed in sunlight, casting him in a gentle glow.

Gavin: When doing a low dribble, let your wrist be the axis. Use your wrist and the strength in your fingers to dribble. Like this.

His other hand gently holds onto my wrist. The resulting warmth and the warmth at my back mix together, painting my face a slight tinge of red.

I find myself in a daze, and am unable to speak for a long time.

Gavin’s eyes trail from the basketball to my face. Looking at my dazed state, the seriousness in his lips turns into a smile.

Gavin: Do you know what to do now?

His low voice and warm breaths enter my ear.

I unconsciously avoid his gaze, but accidentally make contact with his arm when dribbling the ball.

With a light cough, Gavin releases his hold on me. He rubs his neck, his ears turning red.

I apply Gavin’s techniques, and find that dribbling does become much easier.

Gavin: Try taking a few steps.

I try taking a few steps forward.

After an early afternoon of “intimate contact” with basketball, I no longer have a phobia of it. However, it is still difficult to master. With a slight movement, the ball rolls to a corner.

Gavin hands me the ball, comforting me once again.

Gavin: It’d be fine after you try a few more times.

Before I can say anything, I hear a man’s voice coming from the side.

Random man: If you’re playing like that, don’t take up space on the court!

Three young men are standing at the side of the basketball court. The one who just spoke has short hair.

Gavin moves to stand in front of me:

Seeing this, the short-haired man starts laughing.

Random man: Give us the court and go elsewhere to concentrate on your date! Your girlfriend can’t play well anyway haha!

The other two men join in the laughter.

I’m a little embarrassed and at a loss for words.

Gavin sweeps his eyes over them, then pulls me towards the basketball hoop, ignoring the three men.

It seems to be the first time the short-haired man has experienced being slighted, and his expression turns ugly.

Random Man: Let’s have a match. Whoever wins will get the court! How does that sound - do you dare to take me on?

Hearing this, Gavin stops and turns to look at him. The short-haired man laughs even more exaggeratedly.

Random Man: You’d lose out if it’s a 2-on-2 though, considering how your girlfriend doesn’t know how to play haha! I’ll give you a chance, how does a 1-on-1 sound?

I tug at the corner of Gavin’s shirt, a little worried.

Gavin: It’s fine.

Gavin assures me in a low voice, and then faces the three men.

Gavin: I’ll take on all three of you.

I widen my eyes in shock, and the three men are also visibly taken aback.

MC: ?!

The three men: What?!

Gavin: If you don’t dare to, then leave.

Random Man: Hmph, don’t accuse us of bullying you later!

An unplanned match begins. The rules are simple – whoever gets the ball through the hoop first wins.

Gavin takes on a casual posture as he dribbles the ball. Although he is alone, he exudes the aura of an entire team. The three men remain in front of the hoop, defending cautiously.

I am filled with a sudden spurt of spirit, running to the court and shouting:

MC: All the best Gavin!

Gavin doesn’t look towards me, but he suddenly goes on the offensive!

He is undeterred by the attempts of the three men to block him. The wind tousles his hair, and sunlight is reflected off his earring and into my eyes.

Building momentum with his spring-like movements, he takes a large leap. The sweat on his brow slides off his face and enters the air, glistening in the light.

He has a serious look on his face, entirely focused on the ball.

With a lift of his hand, the ball leaves the palm of his hand and fingers, forming a perfect parabola in the air.

With a “thud”, the ball steadily goes through the hoop!

MC: Amazing!

The three men are rooted to the spot, their expressions betraying utter disbelief.

-

After another period of training, I finally learn the basics of dribbling.

Gavin: Very good.

MC: It’s all thanks to your good teaching… even I find myself stupid…

Thinking of Gavin’s beautiful form when he shot the ball through the hoop, my heart does a flip.

MC: Um… could you teach me how to shoot next?

He nods and takes the ball. Within the span of a breath, Gavin dribbles the ball towards the net. The ball once again goes through the hoop!

MC: You’re amazing!

I copy Gavin’s movements, but the ball I toss completely misses the mark. The ball doesn’t even touch the board, much less the hoop.

MC: This is too difficult…

No matter how many times I try, the result is still the same… the basketball is in a completely different state when in my hands and Gavin’s.

I release a sigh.

Gavin moves to stand behind me, pulling both my hands over the top of my head, correcting my posture.

Gavin: Like this.

Perhaps due to our strenuous exercise, both of our breaths are warm. The temperature of the air surrounding us rises as a result.

My hands tremble and the basketball falls to the ground, rolling away.

Gavin: [coughs lightly] …let’s try again, following the same action as before.

MC: Okay…

I take deep breaths and try shooting the ball again, with slight improvements.

The temperature rises as noon sets in. Without realizing it, my forehead is completely drenched with sweat.

At this moment, a cool and refreshing object is pressed against my cheek.

I jump at the sudden coldness, whipping my head around to see Gavin standing behind me.

His lifts his head as he drinks from his bottle, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down.

The contents of the bottle refract the sunlight, morphing the white rays into a colorful, tiny rainbow.

Gavin: Drink some water.

MC: Mm!

I open the can and prepare to down several gulps, but Gavin stops me.

Gavin: Don’t drink too much. You’ve just finished exercising.

I nod, drinking a few small mouthfuls. The blazing heat of the day has left me in a slight trance.

Suddenly, a basketball comes flying towards me!

Before I can react, I find myself wrapped in a hug.

Gavin shifts us to the side quickly, avoiding the ball.

Gavin: MC, are you all right?!

MC: …

My eyes are wide. Gavin furrows his eyebrows, his expression worried.

The owner of the ball apologises profusely.

MC: I… I’m fine…

Looking at my frightened expression, Gavin holds my hand.

Gavin: That’s all for today. Let’s go.

MC: …why so sudden?

Gavin: You were really scared just now.

Gavin opens his mouth as though about to say something, but simply holds my hand tightly.

Could he have sensed that I’m afraid of basketball…

With this in mind, I summon my courage.

MC: I haven’t fulfilled my goal for today!

Seeing my smile, Gavin relaxes.

MC: Could you give me a demonstration again? I’ll definitely learn it this time!

Gavin nods, bringing me to a safer area on the court. He demonstrates how to dribble and shoot the ball.

Gavin: Try again?

MC: Okay!

Mimicking his posture, I take a leap, both arms raised over my head, exerting strength in my wrist to throw the ball…

The ball circles the hoop twice and falls through the hoop!

MC: !!!

I jump up excitedly, turning around and running to Gavin, excited to the point that I can barely form coherent sentences.

MC: Gavin, you, you saw that right! It went in, it really went in! I’m not dreaming, am I?

Gavin: You’re amazing.

He looks at me, his eyes smiling and filled with commendation.

The look in his eyes alleviates the tightness in my chest, and I finally relax.

MC: Before today, I was quite scared of basketball… I was smacked by a basketball in high school, and I’ve been scared of it ever since. I never thought that I’d be able to shoot it through a hoop today!

Gavin reaches out and rubs my head gently.

Gavin: Does it still hurt?

MC: Ah? …it stopped hurting a long time ago! It was quite strange actually – even though I’m afraid of basketball, every time I’m on duty for P.E. class, it’d always happen to be a lesson on basketball. I think I once met you in the gymnasium…

It was already very late back then. I thought the gymnasium would be empty, but I saw Gavin shooting hoops. He played for a long time, and there were several basketballs by his feet.

By the time I finished my homework and returned to the gymnasium to clean up, the floor had not a single trace of basketballs. They were all neatly returned into the basket.

MC: …at that time, I didn’t have the chance to thank you.

Gavin: Thank me for what?

MC: You might have forgotten… you helped me pack up the basketballs in the gymnasium…

Gavin doesn’t respond. He turns to look at me, the corner of his lips turning up into a smile. He takes my hand.

I look at him, not knowing what to say.

MC: You…

In the next second, Gavin embraces me gently.

His breath envelops me.

I hear the sound of steady heartbeats.

Gavin: MC, I remember everything.

[amethystroselilith]

I don’t know if you’ve done something like this but a head cannon or fic the brothers and mc playing a game of monopoly that gets heated I mean like, tables have been flipped, fires have been caused at some point, and yelling. Lots of yelling.

I’m not sure if this is chaotic enough for you, but I hope you’ll still like it, anon! :)

Brothers x MC Playing Monopoly

You are currently in your room, on your bed, leaning against a snacking Beel and cradling a napping Belphie to your chest.

In front of you three, are the two eldest brothers, arguing over what to put on the tv.

“Play in your fucking room, Levi! I wanna watch Harrison Porter!” Mammon growled, trying to hold Levi in a headlock.

“Take your own advice and watch it in your own room! Y/N and I need to play this asap!” Levi growled, protecting the remove to his chest.

You sighed, it’s a common occurrence and you’re just waiting for another brother to burst in the room to complain about the noises the two are making.

“Can you two stop bickering?” the door opened, revealing Lucifer, who looks tired.

“I will if Levi will just give me the fucking remote!” Mammon growled, reaching for the remote, only for Levi to push him back.

“As if! This is way more important than your show!” Levi growled, using his foot to shove Mammon away.

“What’s that?” you asked curiously at the box Lucifer was carrying.

It also caught everyone’s attention, except for Belphie who just nuzzled on your chest, sleeping peacefully.

“Diavolo had returned from the human world and bought this as a souvenir, he claimed you have talked to him about this board game?” Lucifer explained as he showed the box.

“Oh, Monopoly!” you smiled, “Yeah, it’s basically a game about money-”

“Let’s play it!” Mammon pushed Levi, who groaned in annoyance when he hit the floor, “I wonder how much money I can make.” he grinned as he snatched the board game from an irritated Lucifer.

“We use fake money.” you chuckled, “It’s basically buying properties and hope someone lands on them so you can earn money back.” 

“Eh? Can we use real money?” Mammon suggested.

“Do you even have enough on you to play?” Lucifer raised an eyebrow, “Because I just received-”

“Alright, alright, enough!” Mammon huffed with an embarrassed blush.

Lucifer smirked before turning back to the game, “Anyway, Diavolo’s begging us to play it as soon as possible. Apparently, he wants us to be familiarised with since he’ll be throwing a board game night next week or something.” he sighed, “Might as well get it over with so I can go back to my work.”

~~~

“These pieces don’t make sense,” Asmo commented as he’s trying to choose which piece to use.

“It doesn’t really matter, Asmo, just choose something,” Satan said, quickly taking the cat piece.

“Fine, I’ll get the car.” Asmo rolled his eyes about to pick the said piece.

“But I want the car,” Mammon whined, stopping Asmo.

Lucifer sighed, picking a random one, which happened to be the top hat, “Asmo, just give it to him, I don’t want to hear his annoying whines for the whole night.”

“I guess I’ll take this.” Belphie shrugged as he took the dog.

“...but I want the dog…” Beel pouted, ending up with the shoe piece.

Belphie just shrugged and exchanged pieces, smiling softly when Beel lightened up.

“I like the ship, it reminds me of the ocean.” Levi smiles as he admires the piece.

“No one asked.” Mammon rolled his eyes.

“Fuck you, thimble piece.” 

You sighed as another argument broke out.

~~~

“Pay up, Belphie!” Mammon cheered as Belphie landed on his space, “That’s $10.” 

Belphie sighed as he gave $10 out of his $1500 pile, “I don’t think I want to play anymore.” 

“You’re 3rd leading though.” Satan raised an eyebrow.

The game had been going for a bit long. Beel was out first, having spent all his money on every property he landed on, unfortunately for him, no one lands there frequently and went bankrupt on Mammon’s spaces. Asmo was out second for landing on one of Satan’s very expensive tiles filled with a hotel. You were next for landing on two consecutive expensive spaces from Belphie.

Levi, as expected, had taken it seriously, he’s the 4th leading at the moment with stable incomes from his properties. Belphie is currently on the 3rd one with only 2 properties and having collected the 4 railroads. Satan had also very well planned his properties, always checking if his spaces are landed on and collects the rent. You didn’t really expect Lucifer to be invested, he had owned all the expensive properties, filled them with houses and hotels and sitting at the top.

Mammon’s last with his $50 and 2 cheap properties, he started out pretty strong but had the bad luck of landing on Satan’s and Lucifer’s spaces he had to mortgage some of his properties.

“This is getting too long.” Belphie sighed, “Just take all my shit, Mammon.” 

“Best baby brother ever!” Mammon cheered.

“Wait, can he do that?” Levi complained, eyeing the greedy brother enviously with his new properties.

“Rules didn’t say anything about it.” Satan shrugged, it wouldn’t really push him out of his current spot, it would be a different scenario if it pushed him to 3rd spot though.

“We could’ve given it to the bank,” Levi mumbled.

“Ah stop whining, Levi!” Mammon teased as he counted his money.

Levi rolled the dice and landed on Belphie’s, now Mammon’s very expensive space. He swore in his head when he couldn’t afford it, but Mammon wasn’t looking.

No one said anything, they made it a rule to not snitch as to make it more interesting, it becomes a new mechanic where the player tries to distract whoever’s space they landed on.

However, when it comes to money, Mammon activates a new instinct.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice that you thief.” his eyes darkened as he looks at Levi, “Pay the fuck up.” 

“It should’ve belonged to the bank!” Levi argued, not accepting the fact that he’s losing to the scummy brother.

“Belphie gave it to ME so, therefore, it’s MINE!” Mammon shouted.

Not wanting for another fight to break out; because Belphie is sleeping and waking Belphie this time will just cause more chaos, and you don’t really want to deal with that at this late of an hour, so grabbing your portable console you smiled at Levi.

“Levi, can you help me finish this boss?” you asked sweetly, “Been stuck with it for a while, I don’t want to play with randoms.”

The 3rd’s angry quickly faded, someone needs him! And it’s not just someone, it’s his favourite person in the whole world!

“Of course!” he smiled brightly, smirking internally when he felt Mammon’s elated mood go sour with jealousy.

“Can we go on with the game now?” Lucifer sighed, getting bored of the game as well, but refusing to stop until he’s on top.

“Whoa! I’m second leading now, Satan! Rags to riches, baby!” Mammon bragged as he counted his money, “Lucifer’s next.” he snickered with a determined glint in his eyes.

You began to worry as you felt the beginnings of Satan’s wrath. 

The blonde smiled, “Why don’t we move on yeah?” 

No one seemed to notice, but the dice had a subtle purple-ish glow.

“Yeah, yeah, peasant.” Mammon snickered before picking up the dice.

Satan’s smile widened as the dice rolls.

Mammon moved his piece, freezing when he saw where it landed.

“Oh my…” Satan tsked.

And just like that… Mammon’s out.

~~~

You never knew Monopoly could be interesting in the late game, but here you all are, watching intently as Satan and Lucifer battled on the board, even Belphie stayed awake in hopes of Satan beating Lucifer.

The turns consist of the other almost bankrupting their opponent, having been saved by having $5 leftover but gaining the empire again when the other landed on their spot. 

“Just give up, Lucifer,” Satan smirked at Lucifer and his $1, “Two of my spaces are in front of you and the chance of you landing there is pretty high.” 

“The most expensive space is a few steps ahead of you, while the chances are lower, it will push me to victory,” Lucifer smirked.

Satan eyed the space the will surely doom him, but so far throughout the game, only 2 had fallen victim from it. 

He began to calculate the possibilities of him landing there, slowly picking the dice and hoping that lady luck is on his side.

Everyone held their breath when the dice revealed the result, Satan moving his piece to the number shown.

“I…” his eyes widened at the last space he landed.

“Pay up, my dear brother,” Lucifer smirked.

“FUCK YOU, LUCIFER!!!” Satan burst into his demon board, flipping the board and jumping on Lucifer.

“Jeez, Satan, it’s just a game!” Mammon rolled his eyes, “Don’t be a sore loser, I mean even Levi didn’t flip the board when he lost to me.” he snickered.

“You only won over me because Belphie helped you! You’re as hopeless in real life!” Levi snapped.

“Awww, did I hurt you gamer otaku pride? The only thing you’re good at but still lost.” Mammon mocked before he was thrown on the other side of the room.

The sudden move accidentally bumped Beel, causing whatever he was eating to fall on Asmo.

“BEEL! THIS IS ONE OF MY EXPENSIVE SHIRTS!” Asmo shrieked in horror as the oily liquid ruined the fabric of his shirt, “You idiot! Can’t you just eat in the fucking kitchen?!” he hissed.

“Why are you wearing an expensive shirt indoors in the first place? Not his fault you’re so desperate to impress Y/N.” Belphie defended, his sharp tongue going off due to his crankiness.

“That’s so rich coming from you, Belphie, aren’t you the one who’s leeching on their side like the desperate sad little fuck you are?” Asmo hissed.

“You fucking take that back,” Beel growled before the three of them began arguing, transforming in their demon forms.

You sighed as you step a bit further from them, a text notification taking your attention from the chaos in front of you.

Diavolo: How’s game night going? 

You typed your reply,

You: The usual. 

[ladynonsense]

One Night in the City (TRR AU) Part 3: Awkward

Liam x MC, Liam x Olivia, Drake x MC

Read Part 1 Here

Read Part 2 Here

Part 3 of a series. AU where Maxwell never brought MC to Cordonia. Liam never saw or heard from her again after the night of his bachelor party. Here he’s decided to see her again at the end of his engagement tour and it’s horribly awkward. Apologies to my fellow Liam stans. He’s kind of a dick in my story  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Liam knew immediately that he'd made a mistake by heading to that bar, but was trapped by his friends, needing to stick around to maintain his flimsy "I was just hungry" lie. He slid into the booth next to Hana as if it had been his plan all along.

"She's a friend," he'd said of Riley, defending her to Bertrand, and they all went silent for an awkwardly long beat. He was suddenly very aware that "friend" was probably not the best way to describe a woman you shared a magical evening and intoxicating kiss with and then never contacted again, and he hoped she wouldn't challenge him on it.

After a moment, Riley cleared her throat and seemed to snap out of whatever thought she'd been lost in. "Yes, we've met before," she answered, not quite agreeing with his own statement. "But the 'King' thing is new. Congratulations on your coronation, King Liam, although I'm sorry to hear about your father's passing."

So she HAS looked me up, he thought, frowning. "Yes, thank you, Riley. It has been quite a transition." He wished he knew what she'd read...what had the press been saying? He had been deliberately avoiding the headlines, not wanting to get overly caught up in what was being said about his family or his engagement. At minimum, she must know about Olivia. She'd probably seen photos of them together. He was embarrassed at how much he wanted to know how she felt about that, what she thought when she saw them together. Was she jealous? Did she imagine herself on his arm, instead?

"Earth to Liam. I said, can I get you something to drink?" He must have spaced out there for a moment. Riley was tapping her foot, annoyed. You're pissed at me, he thought, not brave enough to speak the words out loud. Good. Pissed off means you give a shit.

"Oh, yes, sorry about that. I'll have a whiskey - make it double. And one of those delicious burgers...better make that a double as well."

"Sure that's a good idea, Your Majesty?" Drake asked, sarcastic and mean-spirited, raising an eyebrow at him from across the table.

"Oh, fine, you're right, I don't need all that red meat. Just a single for the burger, then."

"Coming right up," Riley said, turning to leave.

"That's not what I--" Drake trailed off, realizing the waitress was already too far away to hear him.

"I'm fine, Drake. I'm not drunk, if that's what you're implying."

"Well, I'm just guessing at an explanation as to why you came here, of all places, alone."

"I invited him!" Maxwell lied to diffuse the tension. "I wanted to recapture the magic of the bachelor party...but I guess I forgot Tariq. Oops."

"Yes, well...thanks anyway, Maxwell, that was a very kind thought. That was a special night indeed."

"So is that how you all know the waitress?" Hana asked innocently. "You were here for your bachelor party? I thought your bachelor party was in Paris."

"Apparently, they needed to have a bachelor party before he was even engaged, isn't that right?" Riley answered, sneaking up behind Hana to deliver Liam's drink order. "Seems like a flimsy excuse to party, if you ask me. And yes, that was the night we met...and the last I ever heard from any of them." She was speaking to Hana, but her eyes were locked on Liam's. He gave her a pained look.

"Yes...it was right at the start of the social season, so we were all very busy for the next several weeks, I'm afraid. But how fortunate that we've come together again."

"So what's the occasion this time?" Riley asked, crossing her arms across her chest. "Is someone else getting married now?"

No one answered right away, forcing Liam to speak up and confirm what she must already know. "Well, still me, actually. The royal wedding is a big deal for Cordonia, and we've been travelling around the world on our engagement tour."

"Who's we?" Riley asked, her friendly demeanor starting to slip.

"All of us!" Maxwell chimed in. "The five of us and several other nobles from court."

"And Lady Olivia," Liam added, answering the real question before this awkward conversation could draw out any further. "My fiancée."

Riley smiled, seeming genuinely relieved that he had come forward with this information. "Congratulations, Liam. She's a lucky woman. And you're a lucky man, I'm sure."

"I suppose I am." Riley walked away again, busying herself with something in the kitchen. Liam frowned after her.

"OK, what's going on?" Hana asked. "Why does it feel like you all hid a body together or something? What on earth happened at this mysterious bachelor party?"

Drake let out an exasperated sigh. "A certain crown prince got cold feet about going through with the social season and comforted himself by taking advantage of an American waitress," he explained. Liam's jaw dropped.

"Is that what she told you? Drake, that's not at all --"

"No, she didn't tell me anything. But you weren't terribly discreet and I've seen enough of us commoners used up and spit out by nobility to recognize it when it's right in front of my face." Drake glared at Bertrand, who deliberately avoided his gaze, staring awkwardly out the window.

Liam frowned deeply, swallowing the rest of his whiskey in a single gulp. "That was certainly not my intention, and I must believe she knows that. I was only following my heart that night...and I was completely honest with her about my obligations back in Cordonia. I only regret that I did not have longer to get to know Miss Riley. I truly hold her in the highest regard."

"Liam..." there she was, apparently the world's stealthiest waitress, standing behind him and Hana once again. He was momentarily embarrassed, but ultimately glad she had heard him. After Drake's accusation, he needed her to know. "I...wondered if you might need another drink."

"Yes. Please. Thank you, Riley." She briskly headed for the bar, her desperation to escape their conversation painfully obvious. Liam got up to follow her, not exactly thinking things through, fueled more by whiskey than by rational thought. He stopped dead in his tracks when she turned around and looked at him with panic in her eyes. Drake's words echoed in his ears, and he suddenly worried he was using his position to terrorize her, without consciously realizing it. He had no idea how to proceed without wronging her.

"I..." he started to speak but trailed off. "I'm sorry for coming here, Riley. I shouldn't have bothered you."

She looked wounded, and he was once again flooded with guilt. No matter what he said, it seemed to be wrong. "You don't have to be sorry for coming here, Liam. I'm glad to see you again, really. I'm just not sure what you want from me. It seems like you found yourself a good queen back home, and you never called..."

"Riley, I never had your number. I suppose I could've tracked you down if I'd tried, but to what end? To entertain myself with your company when I knew I was about to be married to somebody else? It would have been torture for both of us."

She nodded, her expression softening. "You're right. It was always an impossible situation. But I couldn't stop thinking about you. I know it's stupid...we don't even know each other. It just felt, for a moment, like we were destined to be together." She let out a small, embarrassed laugh. "Sorry, that's ridiculous. I suppose there are probably many thousands of girls back in Cordonia entertaining that same fantasy about a fairy tale romance with the handsome pri--...king."

Liam smiled, enjoying her flattery despite the current of underlying bitterness. "It's not ridiculous. I felt it too. It drove me here tonight. As illogical as it is, I needed to see you." He glanced back at his friends, who were all engaged in an animated discussion about...who knows what. Seeing that no one was watching, he stepped closer to Riley, feeling bolder. Close enough that she had to gaze upwards to meet his eyes, her lips parting slightly, as if in invitation..."Riley. I came here because what you made me feel that night...it frightened me. It frightened me because I'd never felt it before, and I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to feel it again. You effortlessly outshone all the women who'd been bred and trained to entice me into marriage. I still don't understand...how did you get under my skin?"

Riley shook her head lightly, deliberately breaking his spell. She took a step backwards. "I'm off in twenty minutes. Can we talk then? My boss is going to be upset with me if I spend the rest of my shift just standing here."

He shook his head in return, embarrassed at his sudden outpouring of feelings. "Riley...I can't...I shouldn't have said that. I'm sorry, truly. I need to go."

"Liam, wait--" she took a step to follow him, but he was already rushing out the door, back into the night, back to his life which had moved on without her.

[walkerismychoice]

Man of the Hour (Damien X MC)

Book: Perfect Match

Rating: PG-13

Word Count: 1693 

Author’s Note: This part 2 in the series chronicling my head-cannon of Damien and MC’s relationship up to present day, explaining why they have never been more than friends. I realize as we get more chapters of Perfect Match, my version may be shown to be all wrong, but I’m going on what we do (or don’t) know now. Part 1 is linked below.

Part 1: For Safety 

It had only been 3 weeks since the initial meeting with Damien, and the trial date for Nadia’s stalker was already here. Damien had been right that catching the stalker would be no problem. They met on a Saturday, and by Wednesday Nadia was called to the police station to identify her stalker. Kai went to support Nadia, but she wasn’t disappointed to see Damien standing at the front desk when they arrived. They stood outside and made small talk while Nadia went to view the lineup.

Sadly, that was the last time Kai had seen or spoken with Damien. She didn’t know why this bothered her. Damien’s job was done, and she was in a relationship that was getting pretty serious. However, she knew there was undeniable chemistry between them, and Damien didn’t know she was spoken for. It was probably unfair of her to feel this way, but she wished he had at least asked for her phone number.

Kai felt a nervous anticipation as she got dressed and ready for the trial. Yes, she was anxious about Nadia having to testify and face her stalker in court, but she knew Damien would be there to testify as well. This might be her last chance to see him.

“Come on Kai, we don’t want to be late!” Nadia yelled from the living room of her and Kai’s shared 2 bedroom flat.

“Alright, alright, I’m coming,” Kai said as she emerged from the bathroom.

“Wow, do you and Kyle have a hot date after court?” Nadia inquired.

“What do you mean? I wear this dress to work, so it should be perfectly acceptable for the courtroom.” Kai was wearing her favorite go-to little black dress. It was nothing fancy, and the cut was conservative enough, but it accentuated her curves in all the right places. Okay, maybe she spent an hour on her hair and makeup, but it’s not like she was dressed in clubbing attire.

“It’s just…you are always put together and naturally gorgeous of course, but I usually only see you put in this much effort when you are trying to impress someone.”

“Nadia, this is a big day for you! I just want to project a good image for your sake.”

“Uh-huh. So this has nothing to do with the fact that Damien will be there?” Nadia smirked.

Kai rolled her eyes, but had nothing to say in response because Nadia was right. “Let’s just go, we don’t want to be late!”

=====

Kai spotted Damien and Nadia’s lawyer William standing outside the courtroom doors. William turned to greet them. “Well ladies, now that you are here, are you ready to go home?”

“What do you mean?” Nadia said with a concerned look on her face. “Please don’t tell me the trial was pushed back.”

“No, no, much better than that. The defendant accepted the plea deal we proposed. 3 years in prison and a no contact order for life.”

“What?! That’s incredible!  I was ready to testify, but I’m so happy I don’t have to. You cannot believe the relief I feel right now.” Nadia hugged William and then Kai.

Kai was overcome with a mix of emotions herself, and before she knew what happening, she got swept up in the excitement and wrapped her arms around Damien.

A surprised “Oh!” escaped from Damien’s lips, and he tentatively hugged Kai back before quickly letting go and taking a step back.

“I’m sorry Damien, everyone else was hugging, and there you were. I have problems with personal space sometimes.” Shut up Kai, you are just making it weirder, she thought to herself.  But he smells amazing.  It was almost worth embarrassing yourself just to find that out.

“Don’t worry. It was just a bit of a surprise. I’m not much of a hugger,” Damien replied with a hint of a smile on his face, indicating that he wasn’t as horrified as Kai thought he might be. This was just enough to keep Kai from running out of the courthouse right at that very moment and never looking back.

“Well I don’t know about all of you, but I’m ready to celebrate!” Nadia exclaimed. “How about a party tomorrow night at our place? What do you say William? I know Kyle will be excited to hang out with his college buddy.”

William checked his calendar before responding. “I think I should be able to stop by for a bit.”

“Great!” And what about you Damien? We wouldn’t be here today if it wasn’t for you.”

Kai didn’t know if she wanted to thank Nadia or smack her for inviting Damien. She was both worried he would say no, and terrified he would say yes. It seemed like minutes passed before he replied.

“I don’t know. I don’t normally mix business with pleasure…” Hearing Damien say the word pleasure made Kai’s heart beat even faster.  She noticed Damien glance her way. “But I guess since the trial is over, you technically aren’t my client anymore. Why not?”

=====

Damien checked the address in text from Nadia one more time. He hesitated a moment before knocking on the apartment door. He wasn’t one for big social gatherings, especially when he wouldn’t know most of the people there.  And if he was willing to admit it to himself, which he wasn’t, he was nervous about seeing Kai again. She definitely wasn’t the reason he changed his outfit 3 times before settling on a fitted gray sweater and dark jeans. Okay, maybe that was part of it.

Nadia opened the door with a huge smile on her face. “Damien, I’m so glad you made it!” He handed her the bottle of Prosecco he brought, and she excused herself to the kitchen to put it on ice.

Damien scanned the room until he found her. Kai stood on the other side of the room talking to a tall man with sandy blond hair. He was kind of good looking, if you were into pretentious looking types. He was probably just a friend anyway. Kai had never mentioned a boyfriend. Kai was wearing a short floral dress and looked as gorgeous as ever.

Kai noticed Damien and instantly waved him over. “Kyle, this is Damien, Nadia’s private investigator and the reason we are here celebrating tonight.”

Kyle shook Damien’s hand with a crushing grip, as if to prove his masculinity. “So this is the man of the hour. Nice to meet you Damien, I’m Kai’s boyfriend.”

Damien’s heart sunk in his chest. If he was able to pretend on some level that he wasn’t interested in Kai before, that was over now. He just hoped the fake smile on his face didn’t give anything away. “Oh, so this is the Kyle who is also William’s friend from college? Are you a lawyer as well?”

“Yes, but I do corporate law. That’s why I referred Nadia to William instead of taking the case myself.” Of course, corporate law.  That explained the pretentiousness and dry personality. Damien worked alongside many types of lawyers in his job, and he had opinions on all of them.  Maybe Damien was being a bit harsh by making these assumptions before getting to know Kyle, but he was familiar with his type. Being intuitive and a good judge of character is what made Damien excel at his job. If that is the kind of guy Kai was into too, Damien would never be her type.

=====

It was a bit awkward at first having her boyfriend and the man she had a massive crush on in the same place, but after a few drinks, everyone was more relaxed. Kai was relieved when Nadia suggested Thumper for a drinking game, since it required no talking. She was fearful of what might have come out of her mouth had something like Truth or Dare or Never Have I Ever been chosen.

As the evening wore on, however, Kyle reverted to his frat boy days and got completely wasted. This shouldn’t have surprised Kai, since it happened quite frequently. Still, she was hoping he would have grown out of it by now. He was 28 after all. Maybe by the time he’s 30….

“Kyle, why don’t I take you to my room to lie down? I think the party is over for you.” Kai led Kyle to her room and struggled to keep them both from toppling over. She removed his shoes but left him on top of the covers with his clothes on. He was already passed out and snoring. Kai would be sleeping on the couch tonight for sure.

Kai returned to the living room as the last of the remaining guests were heading out.

"Thanks for coming Damien, but I don’t think I can stay up for one more minute. Hopefully we can all hang out again,” Nadia said as she turned to head to her room. “Feel free to stay and hang out with Kai. You two behave!”

Kai glared at Nadia. It could have been the drinks, but Kai swore she saw Damien’s cheeks redden. But none of it mattered.  Kai was in a serious relationship with Kyle. He was smart, stable, and driven. She could ignore some of his faults because he could give her the life she always pictured. She should be happy.

“I’m sorry about that. She can be quite the comedian when she drinks.”

“No worries. This party was actually fun. I typically spend my Saturday evenings alone binge watching shows on Netflix. It was nice to be social for once.”

“Nadia was right about one thing though. We should hang out again. I know Nadia has your number but I’ll give you mine as well.” Kai grabbed Damien’s phone and put her number in before texting herself. “There, now I have your number too.”

“Well I should probably head home before I misbehave.”

Kai couldn’t tell if Damien was joking or serious, but either way, it made her feel things she shouldn’t. She resisted the urge to give him a hug goodbye, because she didn’t know if she could control what happened after that. “Goodnight Damien, hopefully I’ll see you again soon.”

[pure100percent]

T R A N S L A T E D !

As anon requested, I have translated the Twitter questions. This is not a literal translation. There wasn’t much point of including all that mumbling chit chat since most of it was utter nonsense. There are mistakes with grammar, like usually in my writings. I might, or might not fix them later.  I marked down the timestamps for the questions so you can try to follow up. 0:36 NHL WMA: So, Teukka is an upstairs neighbour to Sepe and Sepe’s wife-to-be. How do you feel about this living arrangement? Sepe: Well, I lived here with Teukka at the beginning of the season. That went well. We didn’t cook much, but we had a good time. NHL WMA: How long it took for you to get your own apartment? Sepe: Our season started with a long road trip and it was after that. I don’t remember exactly, but quite early. 1:10 NHL WMA: Teukka, has there been any rookie teasing? Teukka: Absolutely not. But I make sure he picks up the pucks. He’s trying to leave the rink early... Sometimes I have to pick them. NHL WMA: Stanley Cup winner picking up pucks while Seppo sneaks to a locker room. Sepe: That’s not true! NHL WMA: Proffa is a tough guy! Sepe: That’s not true! NHL WMA: He is indeed a tough guy! 1:43 NHL WMA: Chicago was full of big hockey persons. Do you feel being different in a locker room now? Teukka: Yeah, it’s a bit easier here. Chicago was full of big stars I’ve been looking up all my life. Here we have younger guys and it has been easier to speak a bit more and adapt to the team. 2:21 NHL WMA: It’s time for the legendary Ask Twitter -feature. Do the boys have a background in parkour? Sepe: No Teukka: No, I don’t think so. 2:34 NHL WMA: Is there a story for your jersey numbers? Sepe:16 was my number, but it wasn’t available (for wjc2016). 20 was available, it looked good. I played good with that.16 wasn’t available here neither, so I took 20. NHL WMA: That (wjc2016) went rather well. Sepe: It went really well. We had a good trio with Pulju and Pate. Teukka: I have a small comment to that. I played with 20 (wjc2014), so it must have been influencing Sepe’s decision. Sepe: No. I didn’t remember that. But it’s a nice coincidence we both played a good tournament with number 20. NHL WMA: Yeah, you are both champions. Rasmus Ristolainen ja Teuvo were very good at that tournament. Oh yeah, Teuvo was a captain! He has been such a tough guy! Sepe: Has been. Teukka: Yes I have been a tough guy.

3:50 NHL WMA: Who’s the weirdest guy in the locker room? *Sepe points Teukka* Teuvo: I’m definitely not the weirdest. Aren’t there anyone weirder? NHL WMA: So you are like second weirdest? Or in TOP 3. Teuvo: In my opinion, Ron Hainsey is a bit weird, he never high five the team on a bench after scoring, unless he scored himself. NHL WMA: So he doesn’t score that often? Teuvo: Maybe as often as me. Which is not that often. (Teuvo also shares another “weird habit” of Hainsey related to a coffee cup.) 4:40 NHL WMA: Seppo, what is the most memorable moment in NHL so far? Maybe my first goal in NHL. My parents were there. I had a pressure of making that first goal. There had been some places earlier, but I got no luck with scoring. Teukka got an assist, the second assist to that goal. Teukka: Well, it wasn’t really meant for you to score, it was a great pass to Staal. Sepe: That’s right! First I was looking for an assist... Teukka: Yeah, you got have had an assist. Sepe: So the goalie made save and I got to rebound. I never forget that moment. 5:28 NHL WMA: What’s the deal with Teuvo constantly changing his stick? Teuvo: Sometimes games flow, sometimes not. So I need to find out why. Very rarely it’s my fault, so I blame the stick. I keep changing brands and trying out every new stick. Usually, the new one feels very good and I want to play with it. Sepe on the other hand never wants to make changes. He just received new sticks but didn’t even try them out, because he scores hattrick every night with the old one. *Sepe shakes head to disagree* Sepe: I did change the blade this season. The ice here is not so good and puck kept bouncing. Teuvo: Rookie jitters. NHL WMA: What kind of a curved blade, is it standard? Sepe: A bit higher blade than Teukka’s. Teukka: At the beginning of the season I tried out a new curve. I took a stick from one of our d-men. The blade had this huge curve. I made a goal with it and in the next game, I got an assist. But afterwards, I got frustrated with it during morning skates and changed again. A point per game with that stick, though. NHL WMA: Making 2 points in 2 games, but changing because of one bad training. 6:55 NHL WMA: Is Aho still playing with Kane’s curve? Sepe: No, I don’t Teukka: Have you played earlier?! Sepe: If you mean that retailer’s stick... NHL WMA: So, you are not playing with that. 7:12 (Sepe got a question related modifying moped cylinder) Sepe: I don’t understand NHL WMA: It’s about tuning up engines. You must have had scooters then? Sepe: No we haven’t. Teukka: Neither of those. Sepe: Not moped, microcar nor scooter. 7:30 NHL WMA: Teukka, Big Mac or Whopper? Teukka: Does Burger King have Whoppers? I don’t like them at all. Mc Donald’s is much better in Finland, Big Macs are terrible here. Anyway, Hese is the best (Hesburger, a franchise in Finland). NHL WMA: Teukka has a sponsorship with Hese, or is looking for one. Teukka: When I was still playing in Jokerit, I was commuting with Riku Hahl, since I had no driver’s license back then. We were thinking of having Hese as a sponsor. One night Riksa said if we make some points in a game, we should afterwards head to Hese’s drive-in. NHL WMA: So, you got some boost thinking of which meal to eat after the game. 8:12 NHL WMA: Which one is first to take 5 minutes for fighting? Have you been practising punches during the summer? Sepe: I bet neither of us. Teukka: I bet we are not fighting. Although I was quite close.. I usually check those bigger guys, so I took Getzlaf. Okay, he took me. He said he’s gonna kill me, so I hit him a little and he punched me back. But luckily referees came to end it. NHL WMA: That’s quite tough. 8:43 NHL WMA: Coke or Pepsi? Sepe: Coke Teukka: Coke... Pepsi is okay, too. 8:48 (Sepe receives 3 questions related to restaurants in Oulu.) We learn that he likes his pizza with mayonnaise and he loves his Oulu restaurants. 9:18 NHL WMA: Teuvo, would you have had success in floorball league? Teuvo: I don’t know, hard to say. But during the next lockout, I could go and try. 9:27 (Teuvo got question referring to this song, but it’s a whole different story. Let’s leave it for later...) 9:38 NHL WMA: Teuvo, are you going to defend your won of Bermuda Cup next summer? Teuvo: Of course, it’s my biggest summer goal. Although I was quite lucky to be paired up with that another Teukka, I don’t think that’s gonna happen anymore. (Bermudan Kannu is a tennis tournament for elite hockey players. Teuvo won it previous summer with his partner Teemu Selänne, also known as Teukka) 9:58 NHL WMA: If you would drive a truck, would the brand be Sisu or Scania? Teukka: Sisu. Sebastian: What was that other one? Scania. I’d take Scania, because Teukka said Sisu. 10:16 NHL WMA: Sepe, is there anything better than Mamba’s Monday? Sepe: It’s a nice competition, the loser has to wear some silly costume. I think I’ve I lost it twice. (That one picture, where Sebastian wearing sunglasses and some kind of a strange hat/headpiece, is a result of losing.) NHL WMA: Believe it or not, but Ask Twitter -feature has come to its’ end. Thanks, guys!

[flatsuke]

Six Times Voltage Inc Tugged at my Heartstrings

I’ve been playing Voltage games for about four years now, and I have to say, there were moments in certain routes that made me Feel Things™. Generally, Voltage games aren’t really known for being cynical or overly emotional. Heck, their games, while having some mature content, mostly have an optimistic feel to them. However, there were some moments in particular that stood out to me—those scenes were written powerfully enough to shake me to the core.

I have to admit, it was difficult for me to select a few moments from hundreds of routes, but I tried my best to narrow it down as much as I could.

Disclaimer:

I limited it to one character per game to avoid repetition.

I haven’t played every Voltage game (or route for that matter). The moments I’ve chosen only come from the games I’ve played.

I didn’t include SLBP because I only started getting into it recently (plus I don’t know too much about the other lords to make solid conclusions about them lmao).

This is all my personal opinion, so that means you probably won’t share the same views as I do, which is cool (I’d actually appreciate it if you told me what your favorite moments were :D).

Anyhow, let’s begin! (long post below):

1. Leon about to destroy literally everything in the world to save MC (Leon, Season 1 Main Story, Star-Crossed Myth)

Context: Even with Leon’s mark of sin erased, he was still put on trial by Zyglavis and the Department of Punishments because he broke a law that all gods must never break—he fell in love with a human. Still, Leon couldn’t help but love MC; it was her who taught him what love meant, and he wasn’t ready to part with that feeling. Zyglavis offers him an ultimatum—to kill MC and remain a god, or to renounce his godhood and never see MC again. Leon decides that none of those options are ideal, so he does what he thinks is best—that is, to destroy the heavens and rewrite everything so that MC wouldn’t have to be hurt by the gods anymore.

Why I liked this scene: This scene got me shook. Both in the literal and figurative sense, MC has become Leon’s world, Leon’s everything.

Leon has always been lonely at the top. He may have been the most powerful god next to the King, but ultimately, no one understood him. He may have been a wish-granting god, but humans didn’t mean much to him—they were sad, helpless little creatures who were blinded by love. Then comes along MC, who teaches him that even though human life is ephemeral, people make the most out of it to be happy. She shows him what love is—it isn’t a catalyst for demise, but rather, a source of strength. 

But to take her away from him after finally discovering these feelings? No, he wouldn’t allow that. 

Like I said before, I’m in complete awe at how deep his devotion runs for her. He would literally rewrite the universe just for her to be happy, and damn son, if that’s not dedication, I don’t know what is.

2. Issei allowing MC to carry out her revenge at the cost of his life (Issei Sezaki, Season 1 Main Story, Kiss of Revenge)

Context: MC and Issei have been dating for a while, but she’s conflicted between her growing love for him and her deep-rooted desire to avenge her mother’s death because of malpractice. For twelve long years, she’s worked her way into becoming a doctor at Ebisu General Hospital in order to carry out her revenge against the doctor that let her mother die—Issei. Of course, he’s known the whole time that MC’s been trying to plan her revenge, so he deliberately invites her over to his home, drugs himself with a strong sedative, leaves a knife on the kitchen counter, and basically allows her to kill him in hopes that she might find peace and that he may atone for his sins. 

Why I liked this scene: Kiss of Revenge is probably the most depressing Voltage game I’ve ever played. Its writing is superb, and the characterization is just phenomenal. But this scene in particular stole the show.

Issei’s just so…resigned to his fate. Like, he doesn’t care what happens to him so long as MC can achieve the revenge she so wished for. His love for her, coupled with his deep-seated, excruciating guilt, makes him willing to give up everything for her and take the blame for it all. He knows how long she’s suffered because of him, and he all he wants is for her to be free from the pain, and wow my heart hurt reading his entire route. Two broken characters brought together by unfortunate circumstances, only to endure even more heartache…

3. Koichi’s confession in the rain (Koichi Natsukawa, Another Story, In Your Arms Tonight)

Context: So in Koichi’s Another Story,  MC and Koichi have finished their collaborative exhibit, and they make plans to meet the next week for a date. At this point in time, the MC is slowly falling for him despite her initial bad impression of him. Fast forward, MC sees him with Ai, and MC is shocked because Koichi had said he already broke up with Ai. So yeah, misunderstanding ensues, and MC is hurt and doesn’t want to see him again. He tries to contact her many times, only for him to get turned down . Over time, she realizes that Koichi never lied to her; he did break up with Ai waaaaay back, and he even defended her at his workplace’s award ceremony when someone tried to harass her. She eventually decides to confess to him and thank him for everything, but she sees that he’s engaged to someone else. In the end, she doesn’t tell him her feelings and wishes him well with his fiancee. Of course, Koichi is in love with MC, so he goes all the way to her house, apologizes to her, and confesses how he really feels.

Why I liked this scene: I think I’ve mentioned a billion times before that IYAT is my favorite game and Koichi is my number one bias lmao. 

Anyway, this is the scene that puts Koichi at the top of my bias list. He started out as a cold, cynical character who saw marriage as a means to an end. Throughout his route however, he spends more time with MC and learns that relating with people isn’t just transactional and utilitarian. She shows him what a partnership, and by extension, a relationship means—two people supporting each other unconditionally. Here, he lets go of all his past inhibitions and just decides to be honest with her. He knows he doesn’t deserve her, he knows he’s not the best person, but he still wants a chance to prove that he can make her happy because, above all, he loves her.

4. Eisuke’s birthday 2017 (Eisuke Ichinomiya, Happy Birthday Eisuke 2017, Kissed by the Baddest Bidder)

Context: MC and the other bidders throw a party for Eisuke’s birthday, and she tells him how grateful she is that he exists and that she’d be with him no matter what.

Why I liked this scene: It was difficult for me to pick one from KBTBB because honestly, there were a lot of moments I loved. Eventually, I had to choose this one because it summed up what I love the most about Eisuke and MC’s relationship—both of them fill in each other’s gaps and support each other unconditionally, albeit in different ways. She can see through him, his flaws, his fears, and she accepts all of him wholeheartedly. He, on the other hand, is in awe; no one has ever bothered to look beyond the surface except her, and for that, words can’t express how thankful he is that she came into his life. 

He’s a bit more subtle in expressing his gratitude, but when he does, I just melt every damn time.

5. MC showing her resolve to Okita (Soji Okita, Act I Main Story, Era of Samurai: Code of Love)

Context: So after having a confrontation with the Choshu ronin and Maro at the Ikeda-ya, Okita and the Shinsengumi arrive in the nick of time to save her. After Okita kills Maro and the other ronin, he tries to distance himself from her once more, saying people like him aren’t meant to be with people like her. For the longest time, he’s been drenched in blood, and he doesn’t want her to live in a world like that. However, MC steels her resolve and tells him that none of that matters. To her, Okita is more than the murderer he paints himself to be, and that she won’t pry her eyes from the reality he has to live with. 

Why I liked this scene: Now this is the definition of a strong, well-written protagonist. MC stole the fucking show, and I had to applaud at how real she was. She didn’t try to overlook his past, nor did she try to pretend that nothing was wrong. She simply accepted Okita’s role in the reality of the Shinsengumi and decided she would make the most out of it. She doesn’t try to change him either; all she does is highlight what strengths he already has and tells him how much she loves him for it.

6. Asahi and MC’s reunion (Asahi Kakyouin, Forbidden Route, My Wedding and 7 Rings)

Context: After exposing his father’s corporate crimes to everyone at Sanno Corporation’s alleged final board meeting, Asahi, after his family’s humiliation, disappears for a while to a remote town from his childhood. MC, for weeks, tries to track him down, which she eventually does with Kai’s help. She eventually finds him in a quaint town, working at the fishing docks, and all she can do in her unadulterated happiness is hug him; despite everything they’ve been through, the fact that they’re together again is all that matters. 

Why I liked this scene: I never thought this guy, of all people, would manage to make it to the list lmao… but seriously, his Forbidden Route surprised me with how good it was.

He starts off as an arrogant, selfish egoist who doesn’t understand how his actions ultimately affect others. Over time though, he spends time with MC, lives with her for a while, and comes to discover what he had been missing all his life—the warmth of another person. He’s awkward at discovering his own feelings, but he resolutely decides to live by them. He sacrifices everything he once believed in (ruthlessness, cold efficiency) to uphold what he now believes is right (fairness, selflessness). When he sees MC again, he’s so humbled that she still wants to be with even after he threw everything away, and my heart couldn’t take how much he’s changed since the beginning.

In terms of character development, Asahi takes the cake.

[hanharin]

Two Worlds Apart (ZenxMC) -- Chapter 2

WARNING: If you haven’t read Chapter 1, you won’t really know what’s going on. 

My masterlist can be found here.

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Recommended song for this chapter: “ The Person Who Once Loved Me “ by Heo Gak

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Two Worlds Apart -- Chapter 2

Zen stood outside of his old apartment. Even while he was in Japan, he paid the rent for it just in case he ever decided to come back. Hesitantly, he unlocked the door. The moment he set foot into the apartment, a wave of nostalgia hit him. Everything looked exactly the same. Well, everything except for the fact that none of your things were there.

His mind flashed back to the time when you lived with him. You always had a stack of books on the coffee table and had set up a desk in the corner of the living room to do RFA work. The refrigerator always had reminders posted on it. You always forgot your bunny slippers at the foot of the couch. His closet was always stuffed – half with your clothes and half with his clothes. To put it simply, you made his apartment feel like a home.

Looking at the apartment now, he noticed how plain and bland it was. The paintings you had hung on the wall were gone. Those old running shoes you left out on the shoe rack were gone. Those sappy romance books you loved to read were gone. Your favorite throw blanket was gone. Even the small container of hair ties you left on your nightstand was gone. Everything that could have possibly been a sign that you used to live there was gone. Zen felt a pang in his chest; he felt choked up. Can I even call this home anymore?

After setting his bags down in the bedroom, he pulled out his phone. He paused. Was it really okay to do this? Would you even want to talk to him? Shaking his doubts away, he found your number and dialed it. Putting the phone to his ear, he immediately heard an automated voice saying that the number didn’t exist. He let go of a breath he didn’t even realize he had been holding.

Okay, maybe MC changed her number for some reason. That’s no big deal. I can just ask someone in the RFA for it, right? Looking down at his phone once again, he opened the RFA messenger app, which he hadn’t opened since he left for Japan. No one was online. That’s strange. It’s okay, he decided. He would just call one of them.

He dialed Jaehee’s number. If there was anyone who would know what everyone was up to, it would be her. However, after several rings, he was sent to voicemail. Shit. I’m an idiot.. He had forgotten how much work Jaehee had. Of course, she wouldn’t have time to answer the phone.

Next, he clicked the call button next to Yoosung’s name. He silently hoped that Yoosung wouldn’t be in the middle of an LOLOL game right now. Surprisingly, Yoosung picked up after two rings.

 “Hyung? Is this really you?”

“Yoosung! I’m back in Korea. I wanted to talk to you.”

“Oh … you are?” Huh … Why does he sound like he isn’t happy that I’m back?

“Yoosung … is something wrong?”

“Huh? No, nothing. Hyung, I need to go. It’s the end of my lunch break, and I need to get to the cadaver lab. I’ll talk to you later, okay? Annyeong.”

“Wait, Yoosu–.” He had already hung up. Well, it seems that kid really did end up getting into medical school. Zen couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride. But that pride was quickly put down as he remembered the unease he heard in Yoosung’s voice.

Shaking it off, he decided to call Seven. That hacker has tabs on every RFA member. He can tell me where MC is. Much to his relief, Seven answered immediately. 

“Z-Z .. ZEN?!”

“Yo, Seven! I’m back in Korea.” He faintly heard Seven chewing something, no doubt those Honey Buddha Chips. He smiled. Some things just never change.

“Oh, I know. My computer notified me a couple hours ago after it picked up your phone signal entering Seoul. Have you forgotten? God Seven knows everything~” Zen laughed. Of course, how could he forget.

“Listen, Seven. I need favor.”

“Yahoo! What do you need me to do? What evil does God Seven, Defender of Justice, need to conquer this time?”

“Can you … uh … tell me how to get in contact with MC?” Things got quiet on the other end.

“Seven? You there?” More silence.

“Oh, Zen. Sorry. Ms. Vanderwood is here again, and she’s yelling at me for making a mess. I have to go.” 

Before Zen even had a chance to say anything, Seven had already hung up. What the hell is going on? Why does it seem like everyone is avoiding me? Zen gripped his phone tightly as he dialed the number of his last resort: Han Jumin. After several rings, Jumin finally picked up.

“Director Han Jumin speaking.” Never before in his life had Zen felt more relieved to hear Jumin’s voice, much to his dismay.

“More like Director Jackass speaking,” Zen teased.

“Zen? I see you’ve finally returned my calls after 4 years. To what do I owe this pleasure?” 

“Trust me, speaking to you isn’t exactly my idea of pleasure,” Zen scoffed.

“Still the same as always, I see.” Jumin chuckled.

“Yeah, well, anyway. No matter how much I dislike this, I need to ask you for a favor.” 

“And what would that be? Need I remind you that I am an extremely busy per—.” Jumin was cut off by a knock at his door.

“Excuse me for a moment, Zen,” he said, then called out, “Come in.”

Zen faintly heard Jaehee’s voice on the other end.

“Mr. Han, Driver Kim has just picked up your daughter from the daycare and is on the way here.” Woah, Jumin has a kid now? Wait … Who would want to marry that jerk in the first place?!

“Very well. You may clock out when I leave, Assistant Kang. Have a pleasant evening.” After a couple seconds, Jumin addressed Zen again.

“Back to the subject. What were you going to ask me?”

“Huh? Oh. I need you to tell me how to get in contact with MC.”

“I’m afraid I cannot do that, Zen. Now, if that was all you needed, I’ll be going then.”

“Wait!” Zen shouted. “Why can’t you tell me? I’ve called everyone else, and they all avoided me. What the fuck are you all hiding from me?” he demanded.

“It is not my obligation to tell you.”

“Jumin,” Zen said, actually calling Jumin by his name for once, surprising the corporate director. “You know that I would never call you for anything. You were my last resort. So just this once … please.” 

Jumin let out a long sigh and was quiet for a while.

“… Very well. I will text you the address.”

Zen let out a breath, relieved. Maybe the jerk wasn’t that bad after all.

“Really? Thanks. This means a lot to me. Even if it’s coming from you.”

“Take care of yourself. I’ll be going now.” Jumin hung up.

A few seconds later, Zen’s phone received a text. He quickly opened it and looked at the address. Hmm … where is this? I’ve never been in that area before. Excitedly, he copied and pasted the address into Naver, smiling as he waited for the search engine to load the results.

His smile dropped. 

It was a columbarium. 

[smile-smile-ichthys]

Behind the Scenes - Zen Fanfic - Final Chapter

Title: Behind the Scenes Game: Mystic Messenger Characters: Zen X MC, 707, Yoosung, Echo Girl Rating: Mature, it has a little smut in chapter 7 and swearing Description: For self insert month I have written a multichapter fanfic about Zen meeting me at a theatre and how we fall in love. Can we get over the issue of the possibility of a long distance relationship? Maybe it’s Echo Girl who’s our true obstacle ;) Chapters: 1,2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8

Final chapter guys, thanks for giving such lovely feedback for this self insert! Enjoy!

Tagging the usual lovelies @hifftn @obiwanmcprobie @nitelotus @tygerlander and @basically-lol

Zen has entered the chatroom.

Zen: Seven? You here?

707 has entered the chatroom.

707: I am now, what’s up?

Zen: I need a favour, remember Heather?

707: I couldn’t forget her even if I wanted to, what’s happened?

 Heather’s POV

That evening felt longer than it needed to. Almost as soon as I had sat down on the sofa, my phone rang, a little louder than I remember setting it. I didn’t even need to look at the caller ID, I knew it was work back at home.

“Hello?” I asked.

“Heather? Hi, it’s Kat” she said, thankfully not sounding too upset.

“Hi Kat, how are you?” I asked.

“Could be better, what’s happened over there? We got a phone call from one of the managers saying all these things, negative things, accusing you of whispering them” she said.

A good boss to the end Kat was. She was a little angel.

“I honestly have no idea, I was literally just about to start my shift this evening, when the manager called me into the office, that’s what she said I had said those things, but I didn’t Kat, I assure you!” I defended myself.

“Oh don’t worry, we know you wouldn’t say those things, but we weren’t really able to fix the hurt the rumours that have been spread, all they told us was some woman called Echo Girl is the accuser” Kat explained calmly “All I know of her is that she’s a high profile actor, and you know people believe actors over Front of House staff”

“Yeah, I’m sorry this has happened” I apologised.

“Nah, don’t worry about it, their loss eh?” she said.

I could tell she was upset and disappointed this hadn’t worked out, you and me both Kat.

“So, should I just approach the other theatre?” I asked.

“…about that, this isn’t about your performance! Not in the slightest! But we think you should just come back to England and we’ll regroup”

“Let me guess, the rumour has spread to the other theatre?” I asked.

“Sadly yes”

“Then ok, I’ll pack and find a flight for the day after tomorrow, sound good?”

It saddened me greatly that this had all happened, and so fast. Problem was, there was nothing I could do. Some battles I couldn’t fight, and this one I certainly couldn’t. For one thing, if they wanted to believe an actress over me, fine, like Kat had said, it was their loss.

The only thing that was breaking my heart was Zen. How on earth would I tell him that I was leaving already? Our relationship was short lived.

Once Kat had hung up on me, I was about to text Zen when my phone pinged at me. Zen had beaten me to the punch.

‘Don’t worry, I’m going sort this out! X’

Was all the text read. I did reply asking what he was on about, but I got no reply. I even tried calling him, at least to tell him about me leaving but he didn’t answer.

Throughout the entire evening and next day I kept trying to call him with no answer, and since my flight was getting closer and closer I ended up leaving a message.

“Hey Zen…erm, look something happened at work, not sure if you had heard but I won’t be working there anymore due to rumours and such, anyway, my work back at home asked me to fly back tomorrow morning and I’d like to see you before I fly, call me? Please? My flight leaves at 9am, hopefully I’ll see you before then…erm…yeah, take care”

I hung up and placed my phone on my coffee table. What the hell was he doing? I didn’t want to fly back to England without speaking to him. I checked the clock and sighed when I saw how early it was, it felt so much later. I couldn’t go to bed yet, even if I had to be up for my flight the next day, and I kinda wanted to give Zen some time to call before I slept. Long flights sucked, but at least it was going from west to east, it was easier to get over jetlag that way. I was thinking about Jetlag? Wow I lead a sad life.

I dragged myself to the kitchen and made myself some tea when my phone went off. Expecting it to be Zen I almost leapt at it to answer.

“Zen?” I asked.

“Nope, agent 707 here, sorry to disappoint” Seven chuckled and I sighed heavily.

“What’s up?” I asked, remembering I did give him my number.

“Zen told me to tell you something, go to the theatre” he said.

“Why?”

“He told me about you losing the contract with the place due to Echo Girl and…”

“He knew?!” I asked, had Il-sung found out and told him? Too late to ask now, he knew.

“Yeah, when he found out he asked me to help, he remembered…are you leaving the house yet?” he asked a little pushy.

I jumped to my feet and pulled my shoes on, heading out the door as I’m told.

“Yeah, yeah I’m heading over there now”

“Good, anyway, so he remembered that you told him you were keeping a dated diary on your laptop so I hacked in and send the theatre manager a copy, by the way, I’ll set up better security for you, and Zen then went to the manager himself and gave his side of the story, now since they’ve worked with Zen personally for so long they trusted him and now, well, now they feel bad and want to talk to you” Seven explained.

“They do? Seven you hacked into my laptop?!”

“Yeah and I said I’ll get you better security calm down” he laughed.

He was laughing at a time like this?

“Anyway, since Zen is busy with the performance he was unable to call you so when he heard about your flight he got me to call, and here we are, so get over there now, please”

“I’m on my way, you calm down” I said.

When I was finally parked and at stage door once again, my heart began to race. The play was still going on when I arrived and the manager came down to fetch me. Her face was full of guilt and sombreness, she obviously felt bad at what she had said to me, but I didn’t blame her. She was given information from a trusted source on her part and she was hurt, it was a natural human reaction. However, it was unprofessional to jump to conclusions like that, so I knew this meeting would take a while.

We talked, she apologised, I did too being the Brit I was, and we talked some more. Due to time zones between South Korea and back home, we were able to hold a conference phone call to discuss what happened next. I was so grateful that it was Kat on the phone on the other line, she full on defended me, reassuring me beyond belief.

After an exceedingly long meeting, reviewing notes and such, we eventually came to an agreement for me to continue working with them. Kat cancelled my flight for me and sorted out my flat. I was so relieved that I was going to continue working with these people. Sure it was going to be a little awkward at first, but I know we could make it work some-how. Just like me and Zen in a way. Zen.

As soon as the meeting was done, I almost raced out once I saw the time. The show had finished ten minutes ago and Zen would be leaving. I wanted to catch him in person rather than calling him. I ran to stage door and I kind of expected to have missed him, which I thought I had when I saw the place empty. Well, empty apart from Echo Girl. My Gosh, even just the sight of her angered me.

“So, you’re staying?” she asked, arms folded “Bet Zen will be happy”

“I can’t say for him but I know I’m happy, lies that are spread in malice always get found out Echo Girl” I said firmly, holding my ground.

“Zen deserves better” she said.

“Ok, I have one question, why? Why are you so awful towards me? I have done nothing to you, shown you nothing but kindness and you try to get me fired and ruin my reputation? Just, why?” I asked, but I stopped her from talking before she could even start “Actually…you know what? You’re so hung up on a guy that you’re becoming delusional” I smiled kindly at her “give yourself some space from guys, yeah? Learn to love yourself for who you are, I know for a fact the guy you deserve will come find you when you’re ready, but it’s not Zen, stop trying to force things that aren’t going to happen, free yourself my lovely” I said, moving past her to leave the building.

“Wait…” I heard her say “…he’s in his dressing room, he hasn’t gone yet” she said.

It warmed my heart that she was finally melting in front of me. Show someone kindness, and hopefully they will show you some too.

“Thank you” I said, hugging her before heading back inside.

I walked over the stage to reach his dressing room when I saw him walking towards me.

“Zen” I said, smiling widely.

“How did it go?” he asked, rushing over to me.

“Not good, they still believe Echo Girl so…I’m sorry but this is goodbye” I said with a straight face. Zen’s features fell, in complete shock he hugged me.

“No, no I’m not letting you go, we’ll go talk to them again, we’ll sort someth…you’re joking aren’t you?” he said, seeing the smile creep onto my face.

“Of course you knacker brain, I’m staying for my contracted months, you’re stuck with me” I chuckled, but he pulled me close to him, kissing me gently.

“Nah, you’re stuck with me”

 Epilogue

“Zen…” I said, holding the phone close to my ear.

“Oh and Jumin said he’ll get driver Kim to pick us up, I didn’t ask him to, but Mr Trustfund Kid insisted, Seven and Yoosung want to eat at that BBQ place, they said you’ll like it and man, I can’t wait for you to finally meet Jaehee, you’ll love her! She’s…”Zen ranted on his end of the phone and I couldn’t help but smile.

It had been a long 6 months, and an even longer 8 months in total. A whole 2 months without Zen by my side, but it gave me time to work things out back at home. It turns out that my company wanted my new job to be in South Korea and/or home, completely my choice, since I was going to be in charge of the relationship between the two countries. I’d spend 9 months in South Korea with the final 3 back home. That was the agreement, starting today. And here I was, making my way through baggage reclaim on the phone with Zen who was waiting in arrivals for me.

I never thought in a million years I’d be actually moving to a completely different country to work, live and love someone, it was exhilarating! And hearing Zen’s excitement over the phone encouraged me greatly that I had made the right decision.

“…there’s fish bread at my place so we’ll…” he continued and I laughed when I saw him in arrivals ranting away. He hadn’t spotted me yet and for a few seconds I stood and just watched him being an adorable dork.

“Zen…Zen, look to your left please” I cut him off.

“My left?...Oh my God, hi!” he grinned, hanging up and opening his arms to me.

New life, new love, I couldn’t wait to get started.

 Heather has entered the chat room.

Seven: Heather!

Yoosung: Hi Heather!

Jaehee: Welcome to the RFA Heather, if you have any questions just ask.

Jumin: Welcome.

Heather: Thanks guys, I’m all settled at Zen’s place and I can’t wait for the meal tomorrow night, I’ve missed you all.

Seven: Even Jumin?

Heather: Even Jumin!

Jumin: I’m not sure what you mean by that Seven but I’ll overlook it for nonkccdhjdjdhqhahwmc

……

Unknown: Welcome….hahahahahahahaaaaaa

Bncgdhjdcckdnddanfuoehfuibekjbeknv83yr1onlkr

 My phone screen went all funny and blurry, so I showed it to Zen.

“That’s strange? Switch it off for now, we can get Seven to take a look at it tomorrow” he said, kissing my head gently.

“Yeah, okey dokey, I’m sure it’s nothing” I grinned, switching it off and taking Zen’s hand, leading him to the bedroom, we had time to make up for.

[whatyousaiddotcom-blog]

SOME CORRESPONDENCE OF SC

Correspondence between SC and JM (a member of the accountability panel), November 2014

SC     11/29/14    to JM

Dear JM,

it was nice to see you other other day at the demo....im not exactly sure how to start this email but our exchange keeps repeating on me...so i thought i would write to you... i was a bit irrked that you seemed surprised that I said I was feeling quite shit and when you asked me whats up etc

I'm starting to think you have no idea what the impact the bloomsbury ten stuff has had on me... i wanted to write to you so you had some type of idea...

as Im sure your aware everything sparked up again recently ( it actually sparked up (intensely) again a few weeks before K’s piece of writing but i wont go into that here ). and there is now a name and shame blog doxing me and the others and accusing us of various crimes.

I know you have not partaken in this and even tried to calm thing down on fb at one point.... but it doesnt help and things are really bad.

there are a BUNCH of people who read our intervention letter who have grossly and purposely falsified what we originally wrote -  you know many of these people  - ( ie NBa, RA-D, P, STA, etc many others ) and im sure you have seen this stuff circulating recently and over the last few years.

they accuse us of at least these things:

- victim blaming

-denying it happened

-calling her a liar

- asking for more evidence

- asking about her sexual history

-bullying and harassing her

-saying it was her fault.

yet anyone who read / reads the original letter and who has basic comprehension skills can clearly see that none of these things happened. these are projections onto what we wrote and not our words at all. obviously we cannot even defend ourselves publicly to refute these malicious claims without picking over detail and i think no one thinks it would be appropriate or right to do this as both the first email and our response have details of …. This has left space for others to twist and turn and lie about what we originally wrote.

Im not saying you should agree with what we wrote or our intervention but seriously these lies about what happened are more than malicious and completely untrue. equally as for the claims that we were were hiding behind anonymity  -  we went to BOTH follow up meetings after we wrote the letter and everyone knew who we were -  we also agreed to go to a third meeting but that never happened .... the only reason people have my name now is because i went to a meeting and made myself known like everyone else. i hardly think this is hiding ...

---

i want you to understand the effect this has had on me not just in the last month or so but over the last few years as well.

firstly i had so much self doubt to the point that i felt that i WAS a victim blaming rape apologist and that what we had written was of that effect. I had to read and re read what we wrote over a couple of hundred times ( and that is not an exaggeration )  -  i have read it over and over to try and understand peoples accusations...finally in desperation I showed it privately to (redacted) who were not part of writing the original statement -  from (redacted) to  (redacted)  - i showed it to very smart and honest people-  EVERYBODY was fucking shocked at the way what we wrote had been interpreted. It is only with the most decontextualised and ungenerous reading of about one line that you could move to a victim blaming reading...... this response /  projection is complete gas lighting and really hurtful and dangerous. ( esp for me as i have pretty serious mental health issues)

over the last weeks, basically after K wrote her piece, i repeatedly felt suicidal and got very very ill... al had to take time off to stay with me and look after me. I couldnt walk i couldnt eat and i couldnt sleep. i was completely haunted by the trial by social media ( i actually still am). and the very malicious smears against me and the others. I basically had a complete breakdown and had to be put in touch with a crisis mental health team and was very close to hospitalization.... and although i am on the mend now i am very far from being well and am dosed up to the eyeballs on meds and still have very low days. this has had an extreme impact on me.

Im not sure if you know this but i lost my father at the beginning on this year.... its really been the year from hell. I was just starting to recover from his death and then this stuff comes up and was the final straw and knocked me sideways...

many people of twiiter who tweet about this like its a fucking sport know not only that i lost my dad this year but that i have stress triggered mental health problems... this doesnt seem to stop them from massively false and malicious tweets. I have had PERSONAL abuse from R and there are a lot of men who have taken a delight in taking a stand against me ( victim blaming rape appologist ) and think its fine to stick my name on a blog and spread lies about me ( obviously i deserve it).....

to get proof of who was saying what I literally had to witness my own online abuse in real time as a live twitter feed -  i had to screen grab the lot before people could deny or delete what they were saying or block me - please try to imagine what its like to photograph your own abuse as spectacle on twitter. ....

anyway i have proof of a lot of what and who has been saying what now...

----

to be honest im not even telling you the half of what has gone on , on the impact this has had on me and others and of how upset i am by the sheer dishonesty, cruelty and sadistic abuse that has happened. ontop of that no one says anything and people like RA-D, M and NBa and P go on as if nothing has happened.

---

i know you havent joined in in any of this and you didnt ask for it to happen. I have to be honest with you though -  neither you , JB, SB, or MC [the accountability panel] have ever said anything and this really hurts. you were all part of the original group who wrote the letter and tried to sort things out.... no one has said anything and it has spiralled to the point that it has.... you all have been able to walk away.... it was very hard to have you bounce up to me at the demo and be surprised that i was not ok or ask why i was not ok.....

i am basically known on twitter as a rape appologist for things i haven’t done and haven’t said. have another look at what was written   - we never disputed what [REDACTED]  said once -  we criticised the process as we said we didn’t think things were being dealt with in a serious or appropriate way -  we NEVER disputed what she said or said it was her fault and we always said that it needed to be dealt with... its written in the statement which im sure you still have..

i dont really know why im writing this... i know you disagree with what we wrote  - i disagree with what was originally written  - but never did i think you were coming from a bad place -  i know you were trying to do the right thing.... i feel like people assumed the very very worst of me and others and that it is grossly ungenerous and now is dishonest and cruel.

i dont know what to say really - im still not ok about any of this and now every time i go on social media or to a demo I must wonder if i must see people like RA-D. NBa etc acting like nothing bad has happened, acting like they are not abusive and dishonest and that there will be no repercussion for how they have treated me and others.

— ( screen grabs sent including death threat screen grab)

i have plenty more screen grabs that just a very very small selection..

(redacted)

if you think about it " pls remind me who im missing out"

he purposely left my name out ( he knew i was part of b10 ) then asked people to remind him of my name in the  separate next tweet ... please run that around in your head and think about what that means and why he did that... he takes a massive pleasure in being purposely abusive to me personally... its a fucking sport to him..... and no body said anything.

———

sorry to keep emailing  -  only to say i probably have left my flat less than 15 times in the past two months /  two and half months since this has kicked off.... im basically non functional and i spent about a month uncontrollably weeping for most of the time i was awake... quite literally  -  u can ask anyone from a to DG or MH  to the crisis team or my dr -  who took it in turns looking after me during the worst parts of it.

that i have to put up with abusive men like RA-D or women like NBa and P ( because i deserve it for being a rape apologist ) is beyond a joke.

you know very little about my life and nor does anyone else - i have NOT had an easy life , the statistical chances of  me being relatively sane , functional and with a good post grad education are much less than 1 percent.

and now i have to put up with a bunch of very well educated privileged student activists who I know to have high comprehension and reading skills fucking lying about what i/others have written and done is a fucking joke.

and that they purport to do this in the name of countering gendered structural violence is a fucking disgrace.

JM    11/29/14    to SC

Hey S,

I had no idea it had gotten this bad and that it was ongoing.

DG mentioned some of this to me a few weeks ago but but then I had only seen a small amount of the backlash on M's facebook wall, which is what I responded to. It seemed like it had flared up around K's post but was beginning to die down. I don't use twitter that much, partly because of the irritating dogmatism and pernicious attitudes it seems to produce (case in point), so I hadn't seen any of the stuff on there. I either don't follow, don't know, or have stopped following the people you mentioned and have generally distanced myself from a lot of the left-crowd in the past year for a number of reasons - but partly because I find the language and mentality which seems to have developed so off-putting that I no longer feel a part of the same discourse - the result is that I'm perhaps more out of the loop than you were aware.

Whatever type of anarchism it is that justifies this kind of behaviour I don't want any part of, and can't think of anything more willfully destructive than posting people's names on the internet or threatening people with violence. I can understand why [REDACTED] is angry about what happened but I can't for the life of me understand how this will help anything beyond a misplaced desire for arbitrary retribution.

You know my feelings about what was written, but as far as I'm concerned it is in the past. I'm sure that if we could go back in time everybody would have gone about things differently on all sides. What matters to me is where people's heart is - I have no doubt whatsoever that people like yourself and MH are good people with the best intentions. I wouldn't maintain the fondness I hold for both of you if I didn't. JBR and some of the others I'm less sure about - there are some good parts to him, but I don't trust him enough to be as close as I once was; being polemic or 'critical' often seems more important to him than generosity of spirit, and he can consequently be quite nasty to people with very little reason. He is far better at sowing division than anything else. I think RB is a good man but sometimes lets his friendship with JB cloud his judgement, as it did mine at points in the past. I certainly don't harbour ill will towards him, even if I felt initially hurt by him, and I'm sad we're not as close to each other because of all this stuff - I feel like I lost an important friend. I haven't come across RL in the past few years but I'd like to hope we'd be able to clear the air one day if we did cross paths. I've never had any reason to doubt she's a lovely person who got caught up in an extremely difficult situation and any hostility she expressed was an understandable product of that.

As for now, I don't think anybody has any answers to this stuff and if we're going to come up with anything of meaning or value it will require thinking through the kind of criticisms K made in her post, many of which are inarguable. At the same time we can't just ignore issues when they arise for the sake of convenience. Unfortunately the political climate seems completely anathema to learning anything productive from what has happened and looks to bully people (how much easier) on social media instead - hence my increasing sense of frustration with the 'scene' and my desire to become more distant from it.

I haven't been staying silent because I'm okay with what's happening - I simply haven't encountered it except on M’s facebook wall, where I intervened accordingly. If this starts to happen again send me a message and I will offer whatever weight I have as someone who criticised the original statement. I'm wary of putting something up out of the blue lest it simply stir the whole thing up again, but if others are doing that anyway let me know.

I hope you're doing okay.  if you want to have a drink and chat about any of this or life generally just drop me a line.

J x

Correspondence between SC and JM (a member of the accountability panel), April 2015

to JM

and are any other accountability group members coming to the meeting?

JM    4/26/15    to sc

Yep that's fine for me - as to the others I don't know, I prodded them the other week but no one replied. I think I'm right in saying that no one was opposed to talking on principle but that there were reservations about it being a larger meeting, what the objective was, how it might be framed etc. If we're going with the 6th then I'll send a message and see what they say.

SC    4/26/15    to JM

no one is going to frame anything .i have always been open with you about my thoughts on this...i think its better for all of us that other people, who are wise and have good politics esp gender politics... are there to advise us all.... i would like people to stop abusing me for stuff i havent done, written , said thought, think etc.. i dont think its a big ask for the group to come considering they were at the heart of the process. i know none of them have been abusive towards me... however they were intitated a process that has become way out of control...i think people need to face up to what has and is happening in an honest way. as i have said many times i have evidence of people smearing me and abuseing me online. there is a very male core to alot of this abuse. i need to make this stop. my endurance for this has run out and its making me exreamly ill. please communicate to the the seriousness of this situation.

and apart from myself i ( unlike all the liars say) worry a great deal about [REDACTED]..I am totally unable to approach her to try and get aid with resolution for her, which she clearly needs.

basically JM i am not despite what many people write about me online , some type of evil bastard and neither is anyone else. the way we have been and are being treated is unjustifiable and it needs to stop, be confronted and people need to take responsibilty for their actions. i am sick of being hounded online and being villified to a large invisible audience. i am sick of people justifying their abuse cos they think i deserve it. - that actually is victim blaming and it needs to stop.

SC     4/26/15    to JM

i have a folder with 6 months worth of abuse  -  which is about 300 tweets, thats is just a tiny tiny percentage of what has been going on. within this folder i have a sub folder of people joking about putting me in a black bin liner, stabbing me, glassing me and saying that i should be killed.  when are people going to wake up?? i am a real person, this has a real imapct on me.  i suffer real mental health issues, which are classed as a severe disability. do u understand that if i have a sever breakdown i have zero garentee of " coming out" of a psycotic state? have you any idea what it is like to live with that thought?

how can i get this into peoples heads here??? i have STRESS TRIGGERED PSYCOSIS. -  i cant really understand how this cannot at least move people to take some kind of action? or is it that they think that cos i am a " victim blamer" ( which i am not ) that i should just suffer the abuse that i am receiving?

do they need doctors notes? i have access to 18 years worth. i am not making my health problems up....

SC     4/26/15    to JM

do u realise that this is not going to go away? i cant live like this.

they cant justify their abuse. because thats what it is.

SC     4/26/15    to JM

i hope that all of you in the accountability group will stop  not see this as an attack on you all and start to face up to what is actually going on here. i incuded people like np, tz and dg on the list becuase i am hopeing that you might talk with them and listen to them about this, you all clearly have zero respect for me and dont believe me.. but myabe you will listen to them? some other perspectives?

JM     4/27/15    to SC

I don't think I've given you any reason to feel I have zero respect for you, Sophie, or the others. I'm coming to the meeting - I'm just relating as best I can what other people feel. I understand their caution, and I can't force them to do anything. I will say that I worry about seeing me or the others as the solution to this - ultimately it isn't coming from us, and none of us share personal relationships or even a political outlook any more with the people involved. To me this is exactly the problem with abandoning the notion of being part of a community with obligations to each other, and what happens if there's no process in place that can bring closure to a problem - which takes us back to the original disagreements I suppose. This was an issue whether anyone wanted to address it or not.

SC     4/27/15    to JM

No one expects any forcing. Some of those in the accountability group are pretty close to some extremely abuseive people. I find it abhorrent. Maybe JB MC Sb etc might well talk to them off social media?  I don't know really. It seems odd that a group of people who used to be my friends and who profess to want to deal with gendered violence just shrug their shoulders and say this is a consequence of what u wrote. Or something similar. I have pointed out a number of times how what we wrote has been undeniably and maliciously distorted - and then this distortion used as a pretext for abuse. I m not the only person who think this, I have shown the text to NP, MV, TZ,  DG and other people I trust and asked them to read it for the things that we all have been accused of, (redacted) and said that I would apologies if it had blamed her, I lost complete trust in my own capacity to have faith in my own motivations and actions. That is actually gas lighting. Ikon wits not coming from u ( well I actually have at least one horrible grab from SB) but a lot of it is coming fro. People who were on that list or went to the meetings. Plenty people are making excuses for all this is more than shocking... It's like some bastard of Lord of the flies and the Salam witch trails on acid. I have men beating up on me online for things they know I haven't said. And even if I had said them it would still be unjustifiable.

SC     4/27/15    to JM

JM I'm sorry I'm a 35 year old working class woman with severe mental health problems. I was (redacted) and had (redacted). Before I went to university, at 25 my life was spent in (redacted) institutions and women's (redacted). Against statistical odds of probably less than one percent I have a post grad and had hoped to do a PhD. My life was for the first time on 30 years starting to settle. This is ruining me. It's making me ill. I have these disgusting middle class pricks hounding me online for sport and cred. I'm not MH and I'm not JBR and this b10 stuff does not play out in an equal way for us all. For me it is extreeamly traumatic due to who I am and the life that I have lived. As I told you it's making me ill, I am extreeamly lucky I haven't ended up in hospital. Please take time to get educate yourself about schizo effective effective disorder and its relationship to stress.

I hope that the other accountability group people will come to the meeting and stop being complicit and cowardly.

SC     4/27/15    to JM

I am hoping for some type of collective process or intervention. If this doesn't happen I am forced to take matters into my own hands alone to stop people abuseing me.

JM     4/27/15    to SC

I think it's best I just relate the things you're saying to me directly to the others because, as I've said, I'm coming to the meeting.

Are you alright with that, and if so, is there anything from this thread you'd want me not to pass on?

JM     4/27/15    to SC

to be clear I mean just c/ping the above so they can hear it themselves and decide accordingly. I don't think I can be any more use as a go-between now

SC     4/27/15    to JM

If you think it will help I suppose you should. Please do not copy sections but the whole exchange. I feel angry that I am I a position where I must disclose the shit life I have lived. And which still makes me feel a great deal of shame. At least maybe I won't have to go over it in A meeting publicly.

If I find that anyone had forwarded my email exchange beyond people who were in the accountability group I will be more than angry. Equally if it is subject to gossip or distortion on or off social media and I shall be more than upsset.

Thanks for trying to help.

Correspondence between SC and ZB (who had acted as a representative of [REDACTED] during the accountability meetings), October 2014

HI ZB,

I am writing to you as I have been told by people that we have in common and that i trust that you are solid feminist with good politics. I will try to keep this brief. i am not sure how much you are aware of what has been going on recently and for years. I do not have the energy to go over all of it.

The situation cannot go on as it is. I am getting very ill, I have sever stress triggered schizoaffective disorder. I have lost my father this year too. I have comrades and my partner caring for me, so don't worry about that.

I am worried about  [REDACTED]. ( not [person with same initials] the other one )

here are some of her tweets, i have a million more, this is a random selection. I have seen worse.

— ( screen grabs of [REDACTED] and other actors)

there are a lot of lies being peddled here. Of course i would be extremely angry too i if i thought anyone had denied my suffering and my experience, victim blamed and asked me to evidence it. ( actually the position that i am in now )

there are a network of actors here, between me and you and her, who have deliberately falsified what we originally wrote and did and have done since.  I think they do this to make a political point and to normalize a certain political practice. They can all read well. Im sure a;lot of them have read the original text that was written  ( i have attached it here along with my own writing ).

The ONLY reason myself and others have not defended ourselves in a public way is because we am worried about [REDACTED] safety and sanity . I cannot be a punch bag for these people. they are not her friends/ comrades either and not helping her at all. I feel she needs support but i cannot approach her.

There are a host of people getting a lot of pleasure out of all of this. I have screen grabs of the lot. in amongst them hide some very abusive men.  I have hard evidence of men abusing me on twitter and using [REDACTED]’s trauma as an excuse to do so. there are a bunch of women too who have played a very big part in escalating this to the situation as it currently manifests. I have had to  witness all  abuse play out as a spectacle on twitter.  I have ( had to ) screen grabbed the lot.

I am not asking help with anything other than a good support network for her. I feel that she is surrounded by some very dubious people, with bad politics and ethics.  People who call themselves feminists and communists, who are so far away from that its unreal.

I am sorry to pull you into this but i am worried that lives are at risk. i know you have just had a baby ( congratulations) and i imagine you are time short and tired. If you can think of any thing that might help please let me know.

Solidarity,

SC

ZB    10/13/14    To SC

Hi S. I will use the form on the tumblr to ask for it to be taken down. I don't know who is running it, I was only aware of it after A told me about it yesterday. I have no reason to think that whoever is behind it will listen to me but I will message them.

I have not seen [REDACTED] for almost a year, nor am I able to spend much time on anything political at present as I'm heavily pregnant. Beyond messaging the blog post there isn't anything else I can do at present.

ZB

SC     10/13/14    to ZB

Ok thanks for writting back. I worry for [REDACTED] I really do . Her identity seems very invested in all of this persecution and lies. I don't know how aware she really is in all of this or how much she has been gas lit by others. I am sure you can read and I  sure you can see that we never blamed her nor ignored or denied that it happened or her trauma. We disagreed and intervened  in all of it that is for sure  - we disagreed with how the process was manifesting. but none of us have ever bullied her denied that it happened or asked her for more proof or any of those vicious claims that are currently circulating .

Anyway thanks for your solidarity and for writing to the blog. I wish you luck with your pregnancy. X

Sent with one hand

4. Correspondence with an email list including JM from accountability panel, March 2015. This correspondence took place around DG’s banning from Goldsmiths Occupation. DG was not part of B10.

SC to List

sorry but this is not going away..  -  an argument about safer spaces - will NOT sort this out!

this is too much bs, i need some support i want to confront this its a pack of fucking lies i am sick to my teeth of this.. i want to call it...it absolutely needs to stop and be put right.

J M - YOU WERE IN THE ACCOUNTABILITY GROUP WHICH HAS BEEN COMPLETELY QUIET.!!!.... you need to meet with me and others and this needs to stop! im AM SICK of people spreading lies about me and others and abusing ME AND MY COMRADES on the web for things that were not said and done! I do not give 2 fucks about what any1 thinks the b10's intentions were.... i know what we wrote and what was said in the meetings after.. i also have a ton of screen grabs about all the malicious lies been spread about us...

i have cc'd Ad. into this who has been purged from SF. i hope he will help us sort this out. MB and U and J all vouch for him.

i CANNOT HANDLE THIS ANYMORE. IT NEEEDS TO BE PUT TO REST!

MB     3/28/15    to SC, kD, AL, B, AS, D, CB, DG, JM, JBR, AP, Ad.

Fucking right!

Apparently people have walked out of the occupation due to this, it wasn't democratically agreed upon at all. the occupation statement and the people behind it are fucking idiots.

JM [accountability panel]    3/28/15    to SC, kD, AL, B, AS, D, CB, DG, JM, JBR, AP, Ad.

Oh for fucks sake.

Alright, I've replied with this for now.

"I don't know where you have got your information from but as someone who was involved in trying to address the situation you're referring to I want to make it absolutely clear that DG had nothing to do with the B10 statement, and was nothing but helpful to me and others throughout the process. I can't see how suggestions to the contrary can be justified. Banning him or anyone else from giving talks runs counter to everything that was trying to be achieved at that time. For people with no knowledge of what you're referring to it also reads like an extremely serious implication about DG. Please don't put out statements like this without contacting people who actually know about the circumstances, and respect the spirit of their intentions. Get in touch with me or anyone else who was involved if you want to talk about this more, but I strongly suggest you remove this statement and cease implying falsehoods about DG, whether you want him to speak at Goldsmiths or not."

SC - I can only respond to what I see, and have done so when directed to obvious bullshit like this.

AP     3/28/15    to SC, kD, AL, B, AS, D, CB, DG, JM, JBR, AP, Ad.

Authoring the thing 'Bloomsbury 10' was so ridiculously stupid. It just sounds so ominous for anyone who hasn't a clue what this is about. I think those involved who havent come forward and defended themselves in writing should probably reconsider as this obviously isnt going away.

SC     3/28/15    to kD, AL, B, AS, D, CB, DG, JM, JBR, AP, Ad.  AK

All, JM,

I really do appreciate that you have made a clarification about DG.. however this for me does not cut it at all as it does NOT address the false claim against b10.

to go over this again, the claims are based on the letter that we wrote to the email list, which i attach again, with my underlined parts.

the claims that are made against us that i have screen grabs of, are :

- we victimed blamed and are rape appologists

- that we harrassed [REDACTED] and made her life hell in the ensuing years

- that we hid under a cloak of anonimity - ( WE WENT TO 2 FOLLOW UP MEETINGS in the following week -  making it obvious who we were and what we wrote)

- that was said she was lying /  making it up /  said it was her fault

PLEASE READ WHAT WAS ACTUALLY WRITTEN ON THE STATEMENT!!!!!!  IT IS ATTACHED!!!!!

to make this really clear pls read what i wrote in another p[rivate email to a member of sf earlier this month in regards to this letter:

----

I am prepared to take responsibility and argue over the contents of a letter i help write, discuss what it means, and the impact of it and its context... i am not prepared to accept falsifications of what was written, nor projections onto it by others of any inherent meaning or imagined bad motivation or intention.......

for example, i think a reading that is used to justify a lot of the victim blaming label attached to me ( and others ) in relation to the letter ( which after all started all this off more or less)  logically works like this:

the first move is to take a single paragraph out of the context of the whole document ( i mean the paragraph that mentions the accountability panels omission of the discussion of knife play - i think this section is what cause most but not all of the accusations of rape apologia and victim blaming etc)

the second move is then  to do two things with the de-contextualized paragraph:

1) make it stand it and negate every other written word on the b10 letter

2) and importantly then make the following argument:

something like ".. any mention of the context of the knife is TANTAMOUNT TO VICTIM BLAMING...." ... the claim is, the context of the knife is both irrelevant and at the same time any mention of it would only (be to) discredit her account...

er hello???? why do THEY think it discredits her account... (this is not what we ever said..we did however write that we fully acknowledge her account, this it needed serious responses which had already started, wanted dialogue and a different way of dealing with /  you can read those sections i have highlighted them)..  ..... this last move.. ( the context is discrediting) is their ( very troubling) projection onto what was intended, meant written, etc etc

im sure you see my point.

please think about the logic of that move....it is very odd and dubious....

-----

the accountability panel were criticised. NOT [REDACTED]!

when is this going to be put to rest..... THE ACCOUNTABILITY PANEL have said NOTHING.. for 3 years!!!!!! THIS IS TOTALLY UNFAIR.

you and others may disagree with me  / b10 questioning and disrupting the process. BUT NOT BY FALSIFYING WHAT WAS WRITTEN>

I have had to put up with 3 YEARS of gaslighting me, having "anarchist" men abusing me personally, of being doxed online. I CANNOT TAKE THIS ANYMORE. THIS HAS TO STOP> THIS IS NOT A SAVE DG’s REP CAMPAIGN>

i want a meeting with you JM JB MCe and SB and TJ [all the members of the original accountability panel] and you were ALL in the process and have said NOTHING ABOUT ANY OF THE FUCKING LIES AND ABUSE BEING LEVELED AT ME AND OTHERS.

i am sick of this its BULLSHIT.

i spent 4 years of my fucking life in a (redacted)l. i have a locked and hidden social media account FOR A REASON. I WANT THIS SORTED OUT AND THE TUMBLR DOWN.

[themangaguide]

There are absolutely a big quantity

After completed this goblin slayer manga, I can rate this book with 4/5 stars, but I WILL set 5 celebrities because of it is possible, because of these factors: The recap of goblin slayer manga:. One evening a mysterious and inexplicable phenomenon occurs in the nine provinces. Five years later on Chu Feng, a normal outer disciple of the Azure Dragon college, awakens one of the mysterious nine lightning monsters. And uncovers an egg sealed inside him ... There's extremely little to reveal concerning the beggining of the tale approximate poor man results to not be that arbitrary and actually includes a wonderful future. It 'd be just destroying so only review it easily state more, itis terrific.

1) The planet structure in goblin slayer manga is wonderful, is much like endless, which's I direct that I recognize like-but probably if you desire smaller books then simply do not review that one considering that itis not ending soon. Much more demand, comprehensive world, more understanding of the wonderful globe, even more room to creative thinking. This can be a book the much more you search the greatest concept of the big image you've although lots of people drop it early. Nevertheless, in the beggining the typical lifespawn perhaps it is 80-120 years,.

Expands to the following arc along with 10000 the standard individuals live and also it's truly not only about lifespawn, itis life's means, all growers want to stay much more as well as the more difficult it comes to be, the more all adjustments.

2) The growth: The excellent feature of that is the truth that the forces and also intricacy rises, probably you check out 500-700 phases and also think the farming is crap yet maybe whenever you read 1000 even more you believe that's not that bad, the farming approach to the main personality is specific, considering that all he wants initially is source of power as well as the advantage of that is that's even more experience kind, the bad aspect is the truth that there's extremely little Dao concept.

3) Regarding side characters: The main character is egotistic, warm blooded as well as hearthless sometimes, lots of people hate this, however I would like to state that in this type of planet if you like to increase in the direction of the leading you've to think as possible and also several kinds that will certainly produce this pride that a lot of people despise yet this is merely the means the earth it's, never ever surrending, commonly believing in oneself, etc. so this generates the standard hero figures that becomes better as a result of power of friendship and also defending added and even the kind of major personality that believes he can be much better since Youare not and also he's outstanding and also you'll obtain eliminated if you move right into his path. For that reason no escaping and operating believes may generate a darkness that roughly the major character, all of this is inside your fireplace that problems farming and advancement, another side numbers there's really little to express, however there are numerous which are wonderful also.

4) Love. Right, Love! There's love, you will certainly locate grown-up minutes nevertheless love as well as the harem within this yakumosan wa edzuke ga shitai, and that is all, it is not anything you are able to highlight within this publication, probably it changes later on, maybe not, who knows. Route of farming is miserable, deal with it.

5) Opponent characters. So you will certainly discover the normal arrogant young professionals, there are numerous traditional antagonist, yet in the beggining there not huge bargain, universal villians, however this changes, atleast there's 2 incredible "villain" I Have attended date, anyway there aren't needed, the MC enhances in growing, the "bad guys" are 1: male that would such as energy due to the fact that of course, 2: man who would certainly like ability to boost his growing.

6) Capabilities. There are absolutely a big quantity of capacities, great deals of variations, great deals of kinds of farming, it exposes also that every little thing is fine to accomplish energy, perhaps you wont such as the technique however just can chat or do something favorable about it if you must be more powerful. Within this book there's the chi that belongs of routine farming which you utilize to finish martial abilities yet there's additionally the nature put on establish advancement, the formation may be used to strike, safeguard and also both problems in the same time plus they are likewise harder to comprehend as well as improve, better, helpful and also imaginative.

In general, you can locate all the Drama, Sad, Legendary, Soft, Vicious, Amazing, hiking in the direction of the top in a huge as well as comprehensive globe, if you're looking for all of this, after that this is an excellent read for you. Aventure globe having a big amount of secret unfamiliar items, figures as well as forefathers' heritages. For those who 'd like to review manga online after that I advise this. For further details read: https://greatlightnovels.wordpress.com/2021/04/17/w21lcmq642qgrljgd069g1618682311/

[themangaguide]

The primary personality is conceited

After finished this Danberu nan kiro moteru?, I can rate this book with 4/5 stars, but I WILL CERTAINLY establish 5 stars as a result of it is possible, due to these factors: The recap of Danberu nan kiro moteru?:. One evening a mysterious and unusual phenomenon occurs in the nine districts. Five years later Chu Feng, a regular external disciple of the Azure Dragon institution, stirs up one of the mystical 9 lightning monsters. And also finds an egg sealed inside him ... There's really little to express worrying the beggining of the story approximate bad guy results to not be that arbitrary as well as truly includes a wonderful future. It would certainly be just destroying so just review it conveniently claim much more, itis great.

1) The world building in Danberu nan kiro moteru? is terrific, is just like endless, and that's I direct that I understand like-but maybe if you want smaller sized books after that just do not check out that a person since itis not ending quickly. A lot more need, substantial world, more expertise of the great globe, even more area to creativity. This can be a publication the more you search the greatest suggestion of the big photo you've although lots of people fall it early. Besides, in the beggining the common lifespawn possibly it is 80-120 years,.

Grows to the next arc along with 10000 the common people live and it's truly not just concerning lifespawn, itis life's way, all growers wish to stay a lot more as well as the tougher it ends up being, the much more all adjustments.

2) The development: The wonderful feature of that is the truth that the forces as well as intricacy boosts, maybe you read 500-700 chapters and also think the farming is shit however possibly whenever you check out 1000 even more you think that's not that bad, the farming technique to the main personality specifies, since all he desires at first is power source along with the benefit of that is that's even more experience kind, the poor component is the reality that there's very little Dao idea.

3) About side characters: The primary personality is conceited, warm blooded and also hearthless occasionally, great deals of people dislike this, however I would like to state that in this kind of planet if you such as to increase in the direction of the top you need to believe as possible and also a number of types that will certainly produce this satisfaction that a lot of individuals hate however this is just the means the earth it's, never ever surrending, frequently thinking in oneself, and so on so this produces the traditional hero figures that progresses because of power of relationship as well as defending added or perhaps the sort of main personality that believes he can be much better because Youare not and also he's remarkable and you'll receive killed if you move right into his path. Consequently no running away as well as operating thinks may create a darkness that around the major character, all of this is inside your fireplace that concerns farming as well as advancement, one more side figures there's very little to share, however there are a number of which are fantastic as well.

4) Love. Right, Love! There's love, you will certainly find grown-up minutes however love and also the hareem within this Hyulla's Race manga, which is all, it is nothing you are able to stress within this book, maybe it changes later, possibly not, who recognizes. Course of farming is unhappy, deal with it.

5) Opponent personalities. So you will certainly discover the normal arrogant young experts, there are a number of conventional villain, however in the beggining there not big bargain, global villians, yet this modifications, atleast there's 2 amazing "antagonist" I Have attended date, anyway there aren't required, the MC increases in cultivation, the "lawbreakers" are 1: guy that would such as energy due to the fact that yes, 2: male that would certainly such as ability to improve his growing.

6) Capabilities. There are absolutely a huge amount of abilities, lots of variations, great deals of sort of farming, it exposes also that whatever is fine to accomplish power, maybe you wont such as the method but just could chat or do something favorable regarding it if you must be more powerful. Within this book there's the chi that's a part of routine farming which you utilize to finish martial capabilities yet there's likewise the nature applied to set up development, the development might be made use of to strike, secure and both issues in the same time plus they are additionally more challenging to comprehend as well as improve, better, beneficial and innovative.

In general, you can locate all the Drama, Sad, Legendary, Soft, Vicious, Amazing, hiking towards the top in a big and considerable globe, if you're looking for all of this, after that this is an excellent read for you. Aventure globe having a large quantity of secret unknown things, numbers and forefathers' heritages. For those who had actually like to check out manga online after that I recommend this. Find out more related details at https://themangablog.sitey.me/806wneqmjjofxbv9ijip581582116920