#anyway now i just have to sit on the side of the road for 20 minutes waiting for the next bus with all this frozen food in my bag

[cranberrymoons]

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[thefabelmans2022]

it takes a special kind of skill to get on the wrong bus while thinking "i have to make sure i don't get on the wrong bus again" but apparently that's a skill i have.

[harryforvogue]

a fic about harry and faye where faye needs to be picked up because it's snowed so bad and also she's feeling very very needy. has smut so be careful. or not. do whatever you like. DO leave feedback though or else i will fucking haunt you

***

Faye calls Harry at around 6pm.

He’s asleep, his iPad abandoned by his side with the pen still between his fingertips. He doesn’t know what time he dozed off, but he’s got to thank Faye for the portable heater she bought him for Christmas. It’s magnificent.

Getting himself out of bed to reach for his phone is difficult. When he finally manages, the only thing that makes him pick up is Faye’s photo.

He brings it to his ear. “Hi, baby.”

Immediately, he can hear the frown in her voice. “Oh no. I woke you up.”

“It’s all right,” he says, rubbing his eyes. “I wasn’t supposed to sleep anyways. I’ll barely get a few hours at night if I nap now.” He brings his phone back to his bed and sits down. “What’s up?”

“Um, well I just finished rehearsals.”

“Yeah? That’s good. Got out early?”

“Yes, it’s snowing pretty bad now.”

“Mm, is it?” He forces himself to get back up and take a peek out his curtains. She’s right; the snow lays on the roads, flurries all around still. “You wanna stay on the phone with me until you get home?”

“That’s kind of the thing. I’ve been at this bus stop for 15 minutes and my app keeps saying the bus is about to come, but the roads aren’t properly cleared so I don’t think it’s coming.”

Harry frowns. “You’re outside?”

“Yeah. I walked to the stop, but it’s like a ghost town here. Nobody’s out driving. The buses may have all been canceled.”

“Oh shit. Are you wearing warm clothes? Gloves and all?”

“Yup.”

“Good. Which stop are you at today? I’ll come get you.”

There’s instant relief in her voice. “Thank you.” She tells him which stop and then sighs softly. “It’s not that cold which is good. I suppose I should sit down on the bench but there’s ice on it and I already slipped while walking here. My butt still hurts.”

Harry groans as he tugs his jacket on and grabs an extra beanie. He shoves his feet into his shoes and grabs his keys. “Don’t tell me that,” he says. “Are you all right?”

“Yes,” Faye laughs. “I’m okay.”

“Think you can hold on for 15 minutes?”

“Yes, but Harry you have to drive safely, okay? The inner roads aren’t cleared at all.”

Harry sticks a piece of gum in his mouth. “Yeah, love, I’ll be fine.”

“Okay.”

“Wanna stay on the phone with me?”

“Um, I would, but I can barely feel my fingers.”

Harry has to groan again. He’s outside now and thankfully his car isn’t looking too bad. He’ll still need to defrost it a bit. “Faye, you just told me you had gloves!”

“Whoops.”

“Okay, I’m going to hang up, but please try to get warm. Go into one of those shops nearby.”

“The only shop open near me is the chicken shop.”

“Go in there.”

“I don’t like the smell of chicken.”

“I must say that you are insanely difficult today.”

Faye giggles. “I’m not.” She must hear him turn his ignition on. “Okay, bye now. Drive safe.”

“I will.”

She hangs up. Harry has to step out of the car with his snow brush, pushing his way over to clean his windshields. He’s blasting the heat on the inside, and within ten minutes, he’s ready to go. When he gets back in his car, he’s muttering swears, trembling with the cold. “Not that cold, my ass.”

And Faye’s right. The inner roads are horrendous. He drives so below the speed limit, he may as well walk to get her. 15 minutes turn into 20 and by the time he’s pulling up to her bus stop, he’s very worried Faye may be a frozen block of ice. 

Faye wobbles her way over to the car, yanking the door open and all but throwing herself inside. She’s shivering so bad, Harry puts the car in park and reaches over the console to hug her tightly.

“For fuck’s sake, Faye,” he mutters, suppressing a shiver at her cold face pressed into his neck. “I told you to go into the shop!”

“If y-you made me wait any longer, I would have!”

“I drove as fast as I could.”

Harry turns the heat up higher and rubs her arms firmly, trying to get her tight muscles to relax. She’s wearing a winter jacket, yes, but her head is uncovered and she doesn’t even have a scarf. He pulls back to look at her, hoping there’s disappointment on his face. But Faye’s eyes just light up and then she’s lifting her head to get a kiss.

He can’t say no.

He cups her face and softly kisses her. Her lips are cold, but he can still taste the cherry chapstick as if she kept reapplying it every few minutes. She kisses him several more times, but when she places her frozen hands on his neck, he pulls away sharply.

“Faye!” He holds his neck as if wounded. “That’s so cold!”

Faye’s knees bounce. “Sorry!"

She doesn’t look sorry.

He grabs the beanie he’s brought her and throws it onto her head. Her bangs get caught on her forehead, momentarily blinding her, and she laughs, fixing the hat. Her black hair frames her cheeks. She reaches in for another kiss, but Harry stops her with a shake of his head.

“Get warm first. Or else you’ll get hypothermia and then I’ll have nobody to kiss.”

Faye says, “Wow you sound a lot like me.” She holds her trembling hands by the vents, shivering so bad, she’s compelled to make audible noises to show how cold she is, her jaw quivering. Harry starts driving the car again, and once he gets off the main street, he reaches for her hand and holds it in his lap.

“How were rehearsals?”

“Okay,” she says, shoulders shaking. “Maybe people couldn’t come in today because of the snow. I had to do, like, three roles.”

“Opening night is next month, right?”

“Yup. I got you your tickets.”

Harry kisses the back of her hand, squeezing her pale fingertips hard. She's painted her nails dark blue, he notices. “Thank you. Are you hungry?”

“Mhm.”

“Let’s get something to eat then. I don’t have anything at home. Didn’t cook today.”

“Oh. Are we going to yours?”

“Yes.”

“Can I stay over?”

Harry smiles. “Yes.”

“Is Timmy home?”

“Nope.”

“Can we play that video game again?”

Harry sends her a look. “I thought you’d want to watch a movie or something.”

“Well, if you want to. But I had a lot of fun playing that game.”

“Yes, you were so good at it.”

She was not. Harry spent the entire night trying to save her, getting himself killed, and then yelling and begging her to stay alive until he could be revived. Faye had a lot of fun it seems, though Harry wouldn’t say it was a very productive night.

But, if she wants to do it, then they will.

“I feel like I’ll be better tonight,” Faye says, leaning forward to put her face against the air vent. Her eyes flutter shut. “We’ll get to the next level.”

“You mean level two.”

She laughs.

Harry’s pulling up to the take out shop they’ve agreed on when his phone goes off. He answers it on the car’s speakerphone.

“Yeah, mate?”

“Hey,” Timothée’s voice rings out. “Where are you right now?”

“I’m with Faye picking up food.”

“Oh cool. Hey, can you pick me up from the shop, man? My car’s fucking buried.”

Harry sighs. “Yeah, that’s fine. When are you off work?”

“Twenty minutes.”

“Yeah, I’ll get you.”

“Cool, and hey–”

“Yeah?”

“Can you grab me some food? I’ll pay you back.”

Harry says, “I’ll think about it.”

There’s silence on the other line until Timmy says, “Faye?”

She leans in. “Yeah?”

“Can you make sure he gets me food? I’ll Venmo you right now.”

“Will do.”

“Thanks. Bye!” And then he hangs up.

Harry rubs his eye and then unbuckles his seat belt. Faye goes to do the same, but he stops her, shaking his head. “No, you need to stay warm.”

“I’m fine!”

“Nope.” He locks the car after opening his door and gives her a meaningful look. She watches him disappear into the shop.

When he comes back, he thinks she’s looking a lot better. The red in her cheeks has returned and she’s reapplying her chapstick without shaking fingers. He leans over and kisses her, pleased that her lips aren’t frozen anymore. Unexpectedly, she holds onto his collar and kisses him harder, and she doesn’t let him go until he’s chuckling against her lips and trying to pry away.

“What’s gotten into you?” he murmurs, peppering kisses down to her jaw. She shivers, but not from the cold this time.

“Just missed you.”

“Mm.” He kisses her cheek. “I missed you too.”

It’s a lot harder to drive after that, especially because Harry’s hand rests on Faye’s thigh, and she keeps playing with his fingers, occasionally pulling his hand up to kiss his palm. 

When they get to the shop, Timmy rushes into the car and slaps a hand on Harry’s shoulder. “Thank you, man. This is great. Thanks. Hey, Faye.”

“Hi.”

“You’re coming over?”

“Yup.”

“Cool. Did you get me any food?”

“Yes we did.” She hands him the aux cord when he asks for it. They listen to his odd taste in music for the ride home.

Harry takes Faye up to his room when they get home. Timmy’s nearly falling asleep so he eats his food quietly and then heads to his own room with a reminder through the walls that he’d appreciate it if Harry and Faye kept it down.

Faye says, “I don’t know why he always says that,” as she’s climbing into Harry’s lap on his bed in his shirt only. He looks up at her, eyes shining, his hands resting just below her butt. She wraps her arms around his neck. “We’ve never been that loud.”

“I mean I certainly haven’t,” Harry teases, pulling her down onto his thighs.

“Me neither!”

“Sure.”

Faye can’t come up with a response, so she kisses him, and then turns around in his lap, back pressed to his warm, strong chest. He places his hand on her thigh, holding her to him. As he’s setting up the game, she reaches over and grabs his iPad, turning it on to see his latest sketch.

It’s a very daunting looking dragon with detailed wings and scales. She zooms in to see all of it, thoroughly impressed. “This is so cool, Harry!”

“Yeah? Thanks, baby. Had a client say she wanted a big dragon piece so I’ve been brainstorming.”

“Where does she want it?”

“Around her bicep.”

“It must hurt like crazy.”

Harry hooks his chin over her shoulder and hugs her tight to him. “Yeah, but as long as they’re happy with it, right?”

She turns her head to look at him with her devastatingly pretty eyes. “Have you done any cool ones this week?”

He makes a show of thinking really hard. “Did a decent snake two days ago.”

“Ooh. Will you post the pictures?”

“Yeah. Haven’t had the time to.”

Faye cradles his face and kisses his cheek. “I’ll be the first person to like it.”

“You always are,” he murmurs, tilting his head back so she can continue her kisses down his neck.

His eyes flutter shut as Faye’s hands run over his arms, gently pressing herself back against him. He feels her breath hitch.

“Faye,” he softly admonishes. “You said you wanted to play the game.” 

“It’s still loading,” she whispers back, shaking him off to be able to turn in his arms again. The force she kisses him with throws him off. He’s pushed back, hands flying out to steady himself against his mattress. She wraps her legs around him and kisses him breathless, her fingers trailing up the sides of his head and then burying themselves into his curls. She presses herself against him again, and then she gently licks at him. Harry welcomes her tongue when he parts his lips.

She kisses him like she hasn’t been kissed properly in years – which is simply untrue because he kisses her until she forgets her name on a routined basis. Faye presses herself even closer, and when the first whine leaves her throat, Harry’s arms are around her, dragging her hips against his. She sighs as if that small contact between them has caused her such release.

The TV makes a noise to tell them the game has finished loading. Faye’s mouth shows no signs of letting him up. Harry pulls up for a second to breathe, and then kisses her again, leaning into her with his hands spread out against her back. They stay there until he’s sliding his fingers under his shirt that she wears, slowly pushing her until she’s laying on her back and Harry’s hovering over her.

“The game,” he whispers.

“Hm?” she manages, rolling her hips against his again, her eyes both innocent and flirty.

He breathes out a swear and then works on pulling the shirt off of her. Faye shivers immediately, but he kisses down her neck and collarbones to warm her up, letting her adjust when she catches onto what he wants to do. She slides back and lets him move further down her body.

“Harry–”

“Yes, baby?”

She changes her mind when Harry’s fingers hook into her underwear. “Oh. Oh, nothing.”

“Tell me,” he says, dragging them down. 

“Well, it’s only that I thought I’d do this for you. Because you, um, picked me up and I wanted to thank you.”

Harry chuckles. “You can do that after this, but right now I have a feeling you’re going to explode if I don’t touch you. Care to tell me what’s got you so worked up? I fucked you so well just two days ago.”

Faye throws a hand over her eyes and Harry doesn’t know if it’s because she’s forced to answer his question while unclothed or if it’s his words that embarrass her. Possibly both.

“It’s because you came to get me and your voice was so deep and raspy and tired and your hand on my thigh and–”

Harry situates himself between her legs and lets her knees come up besides his head. He kisses her soft inner thighs and wraps his arms around them. Faye lifts her head to glance down at him and then moans softly when he licks into her. Slowly. Teasingly.

Her black hair is fanned out around her, her breath coming hard and fast. Her lips are parted, pink and swollen from their kisses. She looks ruined already. Harry will never get used to the sight. He never wants to.

“Fuck,” she whimpers, throwing her head down. Her eyes flutter shut as Harry leans in and takes over completely, his skilled mouth ruthless against her. His fingers dig into her hips, holding her down though she desperately raises herself to meet his mouth.

“Oh, I love you,” she whispers, threading her fingers into his hair. “So much.”

He sucks and licks and laps diligently until her back is gently arching off his mattress and she has to bite down on her knuckles to keep her noises in. Seeing her like this turns Harry on, his body on alert. He feels like every cell of his body has been electrified, but despite his arousal, all he wants is for Faye to fall apart against him.

It doesn’t take her long. Her thighs tremble. She cries out and yanks his hair. The pain is distant to him. Harry lets her use his tongue to ride out her high, and when she’s done, she’s whimpering from sensitivity. Harry only pulls away when she’s whining, “Ah, okay, okay, that’s it, please. No more.”

He grins at her, gently wiping the corners of his mouth. “Always so good for me.”

Faye covers her face. Harry helps her back into her clothes and then lays beside her until she’s ready to turn to him and kiss him. He kisses her hair. “My darling girl,” he whispers. “My baby. So perfect."

She’s straddling him before five minutes are up, her hands resting on his chest, hair falling like curtains around her flushed face. The strands hit Harry’s cheek. His hands are on her thighs again, and he’s smiling lazily at her.

“I love you too,” he murmurs, running his hand up to her waist. 

Faye swallows and grinds down on his length through his sweatpants. “My turn?”

“We can take a break if you w–”

“No,” she says immediately, fingers already pulling Harry’s shirt up. Her eyes hungrily take in every tattoo she slowly reveals. Harry lifts his head to pull the shirt off.

Faye seems to have something in mind already. So Harry just lets her undress him, enjoying the kisses she trails after her hands. She has plenty of energy, preferring to stay on top of him instead of switching back over. 

She works herself over him until she’s throwing her head back and nearly sobbing with relief. Harry watches the pleasure roll over her, her hands in tight fists against his chest. 

“I love you,” she says again, taking deep breaths when it’s over. Her face is a gentle pink, her chest flushed. “I love you so bad, Harry.”

Once he’s pulled out of her, he’s grabbing her waist and pulling her down to him, wrapping his arms around her tight. “I love you,” he says, kissing all over her face, wiping the corners of her eyes. “My pretty girl, I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Spent, Faye lets him cuddle her, her face pressed against his neck. His body is warm and as comforting as always. He mutters how much he loves her several more times.

Some time later again, Faye raises her head from his chest and says in her scratchy voice, “Should we play now?”

And Harry kisses her and says, “Yes, baby.”

[spidermans-l-o-v-e-r]

Strawberries and Cream presents: ✨A Day with Buck✨

Pairing: Buck x reader

Word count: 3.7

Masterlist

Notes: This is literally born from the fact that I think chapter 3 was going to be close to over 9k if I didn’t do some serious editing. I literally took the end of chapter 3 and made it the beginning of chapter 4 🤣🤣 p.s it’s me again this was all in vain it’s still that long

Buck is a cuddle monster.

He clings to you as you lay in bed, your arms crossed over your chest. He’d made you get in bed with him, said you guys used to share as kids anyway and that he’d stay to his own side.

Literally 10 minutes later he was curled into your back, and five minutes after that he had his arms wrapped tightly around you. This was so him, even as a child when you’d share a bed with him and Maddie you’d wake up to his legs over you and his head on Maddie’s stomach.

“Buck?” You poke at his arm, It’s around noon now. Eddie had dropped you off that morning with a kiss to your forehead and a promise that he’d text you when he woke up.

“Hm?” He groans softly, opening one eye. He looks up at you, giving you a sleepy grin “What’s up kiddo”

You roll your eyes at him, turning in his arms to shove him away

“Get your fat paws off of me, I have to pee” You whine, clawing your way out of his arms. He rolls over, letting you go and grabs his phone. You come back a few minutes later and he doesn’t look up

“Did you spray before you left?”

“I literally just peed!!”

“Pfft yeah okay sure. Miss Stinkypants”

When you were a child you’d accidentally soiled your literal diaper while you were in your car seat on a road trip and Buck never let you live it down. After 20 something years he still called you Miss Stinkypants even Maddie had done it a few times and both of them died laughing every time. Who needed siblings when you had these two

1:25 pm

Buck is sitting on the couch when you come back down from the bedroom, he’s playing animal crossing and cleaning up his island

“Charge your switch we can play together” He nods over to the charger in the wall and you grab yours from the coffee table, plugging it in. He proudly shows you around “BuckTopia” and all of his favorite villagers. Though he’s waiting to get rid of Hippeux, he hates him. He loves Bea and Fauna and he’s got a love hate relationship with Canberra. Eventually you show off your island, “Faeton” and he’s incredibly impressed.

“God it must have taken years to lay all of those paths” he gasps, staring at your pink walkways

“The initial lay down? God yes. But you know after that I just find 12 piece paths and overwrite the original 12 and it lays itself!”

You two spend the next 45 minutes running all over each other’s islands, beating each other with nets, and trying to hit the button at the same time so your little characters are dancing together.

“You know I’m glad they added this” Buck stretches his arms in the air, following along with the group stretching session

“It’s ridiculously cute” You agree, as you both bend forward and then push your chest out

2:10 pm

“I don’t think you’re ready for this. You’re so not ready for this” Buck bounces on the balls of his feet, and shakes out his arms.

You turn and kick his butt “I don’t think you’re ready for this!” You taunt him and he swings at you playfully, trying to smack you.

The game counts down and you and Buck start dancing in sync. You hadn’t played Just Dance in forever and apparently someone did like his life depended on it.

“I’m gonna kick your ass” He says in a singsong voice, Toxic by Britney Spears plays on the screen as the two of you dance along. He’s not even breaking a sweat

“You play this one a lot don’t you?” You ask him, panting a bit. He flashes you a shit eating grin and shakes his butt

“Oh I’m sorry, I have no idea what you mean” His voice is sweet and angelic as he’s hitting perfect nearly every time.

“With a taste of your lips, I'm on a ride

You're toxic, I'm slippin' under

With a taste of a poison paradise”

He turns to you with a whip of his head and you burst out laughing, singing with him.

“I'm addicted to you

Don't you know that you're toxic?”

2:45 pm

“So like… what is going on with you and Eddie?”

Buck holds his hand still for you as you paint his nails, his eyes covered with slices of cucumber complete with a hydrating face mask.

“I don’t know, if I’m being honest” You sigh and blow on his nails softly. Your hello kitty headband keeping the hair from your strawberry face mask

“I do really like him” you blush “But I’m not sure if I’m ready to take that step you know? Like what if he thinks I’m messy? I think? He likes me? But he doesn’t know about my past relationships and like what if that’s too much baggage?”

Buck rolls his eyes carefully under the cucumbers, dear god you two.

“Eddie has relationship baggage too Y/N. And you don’t like him any less do you? Even if you don’t know his?”

“I guess you’re right…” You say shyly, taking his other hand. “Same pattern or opposite”

“Opposite. And actually there’s something else we need to address”

“And that is? Sassy pants” you pull his hand closer and start painting

“You slept over and I haven’t heard any of those details yet”

“Okay promise you won’t tell him I told you?” He can practically feel your excitement, he takes one of his cucumbers off and bites into it

“Promise”

“He woke up hard” You blurt it out, dropping his hand.

Buck lurches forward, the other cucumber flying off his face “He what?!”

You squeal and nod your head fast “I- I was awake a bit sooner than I let him know and oh my god Buck. Oh. My. God. He’s-“ you look around like for some reason he’s gonna hear it “he’s huge” you whisper

Buck snickers, blowing on the nails on his other hand “Yeah I know we had a whole drunken measuring contest it was the funniest thing in the entire world. Are you telling me you felt it?”

Your cheeks flush even more and you nod your head slowly “Yeah…but that’s not even the whole of it because we started having a pillow fight and-“ you stop for a second, and Buck gestures wildly

“And?!?!”

“Okay but this part is embarrassing to tell you!”

“You once had to hold my hand while I got an anal exam because I was pushing too hard when we were younger. I don’t think anything is as embarrassing as that.”

You laugh hard, your body shaking as you wheeze and fall into the couch, remembering when you were teenagers. He was mortified the entire time because the nurse was cute as hell. Of course they had to be cute.

“Okay!” You wipe your eyes carefully and giggle a bit before taking a deep breath “Okay. Okay. We had a pillow fight and I ended up on top of him and I kind of just… did something? Like it was just supposed to be a joke I swear!!”

“What did you do!”

“I kind of sorta ended up grinding on him”

Buck’s mouth drops wide open and he just stares at you. You groan loudly in embarrassment and fall back on the couch

“What did he do”

You cover your face with your hands and Buck starts beating on your leg

“What did he do?!?!” He yells and you kick at him, fighting back

“He moaned! Okay god he moaned!”

Buck squeals, which is impressive to say the least and you roll off the couch in embarrassment

3:45 pm

“He moaned, can you believe that?!”

You, Buck and Maddie are on the couch eating lunch. She came over to drop off some stuff for him and brought lunch for the three of you. Buck spent the last 20 minutes retelling all the details you’d told him, and Maddie is listening with wide eyes.

“And you two didn’t do anything else?” She asks, stabbing at her chicken

“How many times do I have to tell you guys! No! We ate breakfast and that was it!” You stab at your own, glaring at the two of them and they’re both giggling at you

“You guys are literally so cute I could die” Buck sighs “I can’t wait to be related to Eddie it’s gonna be so fun”

Maddie laughs at him “Oh my god, you’re gonna scare her!”

“Related?! That’s not too fast?! I don’t even know his middle name!”

“He doesn’t have one. I’m thinking maybe a spring wedding? Or fall. You hate the heat which is hilarious considering he’s a Texas boy”

“Imagine Eddie with a cowboy hat” Maddie says

Buck perks up in his seat “With his shirt off? I’ve got a picture of that actually”

You all crowd around his phone as he goes through his “Eddie” folder. He’s got a lot of pictures of him. “Have you ever seen him shirtless? You need to see him shirtless”

“I literally slept with him shirtless” you mumble and Buck’s hand freezes. You slap your hand over your mouth and he and Maddie immediately pounce, screaming

“You! Left! That! Shit! Out!” Buck yells at you and Maddie points an accusatory finger

“What were you wearing?!!”

4:45 pm

Buck drags you to Target. Okay so it’s not really dragging when Target is literally the best place on earth and you’re eager to go with, he had to pick up some stuff for dinner. After dramatically singing all the way there you stop at the Starbucks first. You’re looking up at the menu from afar when someone covers your eyes

“Guess who”

He says in a weird high pitched voice

“My 7th grade math teacher?” You giggle and Buck snorts

“Wasn’t he a dude?”

“That’s a horrible guess, why would you guess that” Eddie snickers as he pulls you into his chest and hugs you. Your cheeks flush and Buck watches the two of you, all giddy and trying to hide it

“Can you quick stalking us” Buck pulls him away from you and you turn around, looking up at him. He looks relaxed in a white tank top with a flannel on and jeans. God it’s a good look on him too, those quarter length sleeves are to die for.

“We literally have each other on life 360? It’s impossible not to stalk you. Not that I actually was. Just needed a few things”

“Do you have Y/N?”

Buck takes Eddie’s phone from his back pocket

“No? Are you- you’re gonna- yeah okay sure”

Eddie rolls his eyes as Buck turns his back to them to add you

“Anyway… how are you? Having a nice day?” His hands rest on your shoulders before pulling you into his chest again for a hug

“Miss you, pretty girl” he says quietly, running a hand over your back.

Your cheeks flush as you bury your head in his chest “Miss you too…and yeah we’re having fun! Just like old times” you smile up at him, your chin on his chest.

He strokes your hair, just…looking at you. It makes you nervous inside, a good kind of nervous.

“You know what you want? I’ll get it for you”

“Oh no- no that’s okay” You say quickly “I got it”

“Actually I’ve got it” Buck hands Eddie back his phone and pulls you into his arms protectively

“No Eddie’s allowed, we talked about this” He scolds him and Eddie rolls his eyes, putting his hands up

“I know, I know I’ll back off. I’ll see you later cutie… and Y/N” He makes a little face at Buck, and you snort before waving at him

“See you later”

“See you later” Buck mocks you in a high pitched voice as you order your drinks. You punch him in the side and he laughs, dragging you over to go wait at the end

“So what are we having tonight?” You ask as you awkwardly and a bit embarrassingly climb into the cart. Buck holds it down for you as you get comfy

“Just spaghetti and meatballs, I know you miss my recipe”

You sigh dreamily when he hands you your drink and pushes the cart “Oh god you’re right”

“Exactly”

He walks around the store, pushing you along and throwing ingredients at you instead of into the cart and snickering as he does it.

“Would you stop that!” You yell as you catch the Parmesan before it smacks you in the face

“Do you know how long it’s been since I was able to torture you? Honey I have years to catch up on!”

“Okay well you know what, don't go crying to Maddie like you always did when I get you back. And I will get you back Evan”

“I’d like to see you try”

Payback comes in the form of giving Buck a wedgie in the parking lot.

Maddie calls you 15 minutes later.

5:25 pm

“You think Eddie will like his tamagotchi?”

You’re sitting in the front seat of Buck’s jeep as he drives over to Eddie’s house. You’d found the cute little toys and bought the newest ones. Yes they cost a pretty penny but Buck chipped in and you guys bought three. One for each of you

“I think he’ll like it because it’s from us” He chuckles, pulling into Eddie’s driveway. He stops the car, leaving it running.

“Remember, in and out. We still have to make dinner”

“Aye aye Captain” you salute him as you jump out. Before you even raise your hand to knock, the front door is opened. Eddie leans against the frame, crossing his ankles.

“I didn’t… even-“ it’s embarrassing the way you gape at his chest. He’s shirtless now, sweatpants hanging low on his hips.

He holds his phone up, shaking it “Buck texted. Whatcha doin here sugar cube? Miss me that much?” He slips his phone back in his pocket, crossing his arms over his broad chest and you know you’re drooling and you also know, in your heart Buck absolutely set this up.

“I uh…I-“

Eddie snickers and steps away for a second, coming back with a hoodie on.

“Use your words, Princess. Focus now”

Oh god he’s such a little shit

“Oh neither of you deserve shit!” You say, shoving the gift bag in his hands and practically running back to the jeep. Buck is laughing his ass off as he drives away with you punching him in the side

5:55 pm

Triple C: Sent 1 Attachment

I've named it Apollo

6:03 pm

You giggle as you stare at the picture on your phone, you never actually expected him to play with it, which is stupid considering you bought it for him. Buck is making you babysit his while he makes dinner. You’re both tempted to buy one for Chim.

6:45 pm

“Have you considered moving in with me?” Buck asks as he serves you both a plate of spaghetti you frown a little and set the tamagotchi down on the table

“Yes. If I’m being honest. It seems… a bit more ideal than sharing a house with a married couple and a baby… but you don’t really have the space for me here and before you say it- there’s no way in hell I’m making you sleep on the couch! This is your house Buck”

“First of all,” he puts Parmesan on your spaghetti and pushes the plate towards you “I honestly wouldn’t mind the couch if it meant you staying here. Please Y/N that is an option and I’m willing to make that sacrifice for you… maybe we can share the bed! We’ve had to before, we know we can. Second of all, please don’t shut me down right away. But have you given any thought as to staying with Eddie? Like have you actually? Because that’s a really good option. What if you went between our places? You know… part time there, part time here. You’re not a burden Y/N. Not in any way, shape or form.”

“I feel like one, sometimes I feel like I shouldn’t have come here” You tell him, playing with your spaghetti, twirling it on your fork. “In all honesty Evan?… I want to move in with Eddie. He’s the best option, I know that. But it seems so serious making that move and I’m very nervous about what it could do to whatever the hell our friendship is. I don’t… have many friends Buck, you know that... I never have. I don’t want to lose him because we can’t stand living together”

“I really don’t think that’s going to happen. He’s really serious about you taking his spare room Y/N. It’s just collecting dust at this point. Hell, what if I moved in with him instead! And you took this place? I sleep on his couch more often than I do here” he says, chuckling a little as he digs in to his spaghetti

You’re a bit stunned to say the least. You love the studio. But kicking Buck from his own place is too much, and you know your cousin would do it for you in a heartbeat. It’s been a long time since anyone has done anything for you out of love.

“You know I love you and Maddie right?” You say a little teary eyed and he coos softly at you, coming around the table and hugging you

“Oh come onnn…don’t cry” He says softly, smiling “You’re gonna make me cry! Just think over your options and let us know what you decide okay?”

8:19 pm

You’re sat on the couch, your legs in Buck’s lap. He’s carefully painting your toenails to match your fingernails.

“Okay explain to me again why Simon is pretending like he can’t get Daphne pregnant?”

He asks as he blows softly. You tilt your head to him carefully, trying not to muss up the pink clay mud mask you’ve got on.

“Because he doesn’t want kids cause of his shitty dad and since Daphne hasn’t had sex or even been taught about it she doesn’t realize homie is just pulling out”

Buck nods slowly, turning back to the screen. Your phone rings and you grab it awkwardly, putting it on speaker

“Hi Eddie, you’re on speaker” you say, your words a little garbled with the inability to move your face as much

“Hey Sugar cube, hey Buck”

“Eddie this better be good I swear to god” Buck threatens him as he pauses the show. You giggle a little and you can hear Eddie scoff.

“I was actually calling for you, asshole. You didn’t answer your phone”

“I’m busy”

“Doing what?”

“Painting Y/Ns nails. This requires precision, asshole. What did you want?”

You giggle at them as you hold your phone out for Buck and he makes a little face at you

“You’ve never painted my nails” He says, sounding hurt

“You’ve never asked” Buck sasses him back

“Fine Buck, will you paint my nails”

“If you come here literally right now? Yes.”

“Bro, bet”

“Wait I’m not-“ before you can say anything Eddie hangs up. You sigh and set your phone down, crossing your arms over your chest

“I thought you wanted today to be just us” you say, your eyes narrowed. “And i'm not dressed! I don’t even have a bra on!”

“Okay, first of all, it’s my house, my rules, you wear whatever you want. Second of all…Does it bother you? Cause we can call him back. I just…. He’s my best friend and I miss him”

You lay back on the couch, laughing “Can’t go one day without your bestie huh?”

“They call us Buddie for a reason”

You decide to put one on just in case

8:54 pm

Eddie doesn’t just come over, he brings snacks. He opens the door, letting himself in, because of course he has a key

“Honey I’m home”

He shucks off his shoes and tosses his coat down. He sets the bags on the coffee table and starts taking things out, chips and pretzels, some candy and a couple different ice creams he puts in the freezer.

You move your legs from Bucks lap and Eddie sits in the middle of you two

“Bestie” He nods at Buck

“Sugar cube” he winks at you

Buck holds up four different face masks and he picks the refreshing pomegranate mask and you put a matching headband in his hair. Buck paints the mask on and the three of you curl up on the couch together, he wiggles his fingers at Buck who smirks and takes his hand, starting on his cuticles

“You wanna pick the color?” He asks, leaning his head on your shoulder. You smile at him when he hands you the box of nail polish and you start to rummage through it. You grab two colors, one that matches Buck and one that matches yours and hand them to Buck

10:32 pm

Eddie holds both you and Buck as you cry into his chest over Anthony’s dad. He tears up a little too

11:42 pm

“Why can’t I just be the judge?” You groan softly as Buck puts the joycon around your wrist

“Because we dance together as a family”

Both boys school you in just dance and they laugh about it and make fun of you when you throw popcorn at them.

Watching Eddie dance to “Treasure” by Bruno Mars is fun and it’s even better when he sings it to you. You’re halfway convinced Buck is picking all the dances he’s good at just to impress you because he doesn’t miss a beat

12:27 am

Buck goes to the bathroom, and you dance to “Havana” with Eddie, he doesn’t have to stare into your eyes the way he does, but he couldn’t look away even if he wanted to.

Buck watches quietly, leaning against the wall. The song ends and Eddie pulls you up his body, still staring into your eyes, his hands holding your waist firmly. Your heart is beating out of your chest and not just from the dance

“Man, I told you learning this dance was gonna come in handy one day!” Buck fist pumps the air and you groan loudly, crashing against Eddie’s chest

1:30 am

Buck clings to you and you cling to Eddie as the three of you pass out in Bucks bed

Thank you random person in the photo 🤣🤣

[roosterm3attrash]

101 ways to kill Barney Calhoun

I ended up making this list by going through multiple servers and people so here cuz I found it in my phone notes

Anyway the brilliant minds of the half-life fandom

1.) Waited pressure plate with tnt under it

2.) im going to leave mines under his mattress

3.) i’m setting a rake on his floor so he steps on it and whacks his face

4.) I'm giving him a bomb disguised as a cigar

5.) barney death 3: he ate what elvis presley ate….

6.) I would kill Barney Calhoun by slapping him so hard on the ass that it gives him cardiac arrest

7.) I drop him onto a pit of venomous snakes

8.) Im going to give Barney a beer but instead of beer it will be filled with deadly neurotoxin

9.) “now gordon, ive been keepin an eye out on this combine hideout for a while. they seem to walk in a certain pattern when crossing over to the entrance, which makes me think theyve buried mines all over the place. now, ive memorized the pattern, so im just gonna sneak on over, and you follow my lead, alright? dont worry, i know exactly where all the mines are.” and then he explodes

10.) that one episode of sponge bob where he eats the exploding pie and explodes

11.) set up tripwire then he falls into a tiger pit

12.) I type kill npc_barney into console

13.) slap the boobies off his chest so hard them fly around the world and hit the side of his head like water balloons

14.) i could marry him and slowly feed him mercury over a span for 3 years until he dies of mercury poisoning

15.) He tries to become a wwe wrestler but gets killed in a freak accident mid match

16.) I would kill him by making him a pizza but it’s covered in big chunks of lead but it’s hidden in the sauce and it’s a Chicago style pizza

17.) bring him to a highway and kiss him so hard he gets knocked onto the road and gets ran over

18.) Peeling him apart by the dna strand and eating it like spaghetti

19.) barney gets trampled by a stampede of horses

20.) giving him under the counter off brand viagra

21.) put him in a washing machine and turn it on

22.) shark attack

23.) pit of sharks

24.) barney gets criticized so badly he dies

25.) barney sits in an uncomfortable chair for too long

26.) He gets his arm caught in a bear trap w a beer used as a lure

27.) HE BECOMES THE CAT THAT TRAUMATIZED HIM. HE….YKNOW…..

28.) he gets stuck in a swimming pool like hes in the sims and dies from getting exhausted and drowning

29.) barney roasting marshmallows but his stick ignites into flames and he burns to death

30.) ATTACH SO MANY BALLOONS TO BARNEY HE FLOATS AWAY INTO THE SKY NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN

31.) barney gets rejected by gordon and he gets so sad his body shuts down

32.) I kiss him so tenderly on the lips that he melts into a puddle and dies

33.) i throw him in to a volcano so that he melt into a puddle and dies

34.) "I’ll turn him into a flea, a harmless, little flea, and then I’ll put that flea in a box, and then I’ll put that box inside of another box, and then I’ll mail that box to myself, and when it arrives…I’ll smash it with a hammer!"

35.) stick a bottle of beer into his throat, the whole bottle

36.) give Barney Calhoun a beer can full of poison

37.) hang a piano over the toilet and wait

38.) i think barney should have his spine ripped out through his mouth

39.) he goes to a bar and tries flirting with the bartender and the bartender takes out a shotgun and kills him on the spot

40.) punch him so hard in the penis that he shatters like a brittle glass

41.) bite him in half

42.) I'm grinding him in a giant shredder

43.) bro took a bath in hot mac 'n cheese

44.) i put him ina giant caldron full of water and i begin boiling him down to gelatin and broth

45.) barney accompanies the crew to the borealis and he steps over thin ice and gets dunked into the below zero water and freezes to death

46.) barney calhoun gets carried away by a tornado

47.) took barney on a vacation to Hawai’i and pushed him into a volcano

48.) He dies and he's never mentioned again and nobody cares

49.) died of tummy ache

50.) Stepped on by a strider

51.) shrinked until he disappeared completely

52.) blasted into the sun

53.) Stab him with 300 pencils made with real lead

54.) slip and falls and dies

55.) put him into a Minecraft furnace

56.) Barney ignores the wet floor sign and slips and cracks his head

57.) while swimming in the swimming pool he swims to fast and smashes his face against the pool's wall

58.) he gets a concussion and drowns

59.) i want to put him through a lunchmeat slicer

60.) He falls off a dumb huge cliff

61.) he lives his life to the fullest and at his deathbed at age 93, June 29th, 6:12 am he passes away

62.) he eats a burgie with too much grease and gets a heart attack

63.) testicular cancer

64.) He should get sucked into a fan while trying to fix it at Black Mesa and literally no one comes looking for him

65.) The Pita Bread Room

66.) slipped on a Banana peel

67.) ran over by a crap ton of shopping carts rolling down the hill

68.) barney overheats in a fursuit

69.) he has sex so bad that he dies

70.) Barney dies because i fucking kill him with a shovel 🖕

71.) barney eats the gas station sushi

72.) barney faints via twirling around and holding his hand in front of his forehead, and then slowly lying down with a flower in his hands to indicate death

73.) When they turn off the suppression fields he just blows up

74.) barney gets crushed by a giant boulder thats all i got son

75.) barney goes to the beach that makes you old

76.) His head spontaneously combusts and pops like corn

77.) erectile dysfunction

78.) we should also have him get carbon monoxide poisoning

79.) barney gets gaussian blurred into nothingness

80.) he eats 20 year old expired mcdonalds burger and contracts the worst case of food poisoning youve ever seen

81.) Have we done tying him to a train track like a damsel

82.) he dies in a glue trap

83.) barney develops lactose intolerance over the years of combine occupation and he drink milk and then dies from shitting hinself to death

84.) he should chocke on his favourite food

85.) barney gets lead poisoning from a 1990s garfield glass mug

86.) he chokes on plastic

87.) barney gets thrown throw a glass window from a 15 story building

88.) gordon gives barney a wedgie so bad that he splits in half and dies

89.) gordon and barney divorce and barney dies from heartbreak

90.) alyx and gordon have enough of barney’s snoring so they smother him in his sleep with a pillow

91.) he trips while walking with gordon and impales himself on gordons crowbar face

92.) if he were the size of an ant he'd be ok instead he blows up like a watermelon and his remains are fed to lamarr by a very delighted kleiner. he fucking hated barney

93.) dog roughhouses with barney and accidentally obliterates his spinal cord

94.) barney gets poisoned to death by his own chumtoad

95.) coats him in eggs and flour and fries him

96.) snatched by a hawk and eten alive

97.) barney gets to participate in a danganronpa killing game and gets executed

98.) barney opens the love-letter-for-you.txt.vbs file and it kills him

99.) elaborate rube goldberg machine to drop an anvil on barney

100.) barney dies in an Iron Maiden

101.) we should put barney under those old timey stone tablets meant to squish and torture people and make them talk

[azaprocky]

┃ pairings ➣ 〔 ❛ charles leclerc x singer!reader❜ 〕

┃ summary ➣ 〔 ❛ a former couple reunites years after they split up, and growth as well as development was the only thing they have similarities now. ❜ 〕

┃ face claim ➣ 〔 ❛ Beabadobee ❜ 〕

┃ warnings ➣ 〔 ❛ swearing, cheating ❜ 〕

I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit, been saying "yes" instead of "no"

your.username

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your.username‎ ‎ ‎ SHE IS NOW RELEASED❗ 🫡

I give you my first ever full length album (Your Nickname)topia! i give my warmest gratitude to all of my supporters both old and new, thank you for staying by my side through the rocky roads.

I LOVE YOU ALL SO FCKIN' MUCH! 🫶

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clairo‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ proud of you baby! 💐

lewishamilton‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ❤️❤️❤️

sadiesink ‎ ‎ ‎ my queen 🧎🧎

y/nlovebot‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ we missed you so much mom!

nayeonny‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ she slays every. fucking. time. and she knows it

cl16supremacy ‎ ‎ ‎ did Charles just liked her post?? I'm here for it!

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And if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow, and it's alright now

❝ here goes fucking nothing ❞ (Y/n) sighed as she opened the door entering a secluded cafe in the downtown of Monte Carlo in Monaco, she didn't even know why she agreed to meet up with her ex after 2 years of splitting up or maybe she couldn't handle and grew tired Charles' perseverance to talk about their relationship and opting to stay friends with her after the things that happened between them

"well hello there my favorite singer, it's nice to see you after awhile" Charles greeted the 23 year old singer, standing up and smiling at her "Fuck off, we all know you love Coldplay, and it's not nice to see you again" (Y/n) said in a sarcastic tone rolling her eyes at the driver, earning a slight laugh from him as they side hugged eachother before sitting on the dimly lighted window section of the small cafe

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But we were something, don't you think so?, roaring 20s, tossing pennies in the pool and if my wishes came true It would've been you

It's been clearly 2 years after their split, and even thought the two had known each other all their lives and had been recently talking to eachother time to time (Y/n) is still sensing a bit of awkward tension between them which Charles' had sensed and him deciding to break it with a question "so how's life treating you?" The driver asked smiling at her

"Good I guess, touring around the world made me discover some things about myself and it's a free touring accomodations in some way" The girl answered chuckling in the last part earning a nod from the driver clearly listening to her and smiling "you?, Is Ferrari still treating you like shit?" The Ferrari driver couldn't help but chuckle at what the girl had just said but he couldn't deny it, in a slightest bit it was true

"You could say that, this season has been quite shitty" the monacan driver answered a hint of sadness was quite evident from the way he spoke, (Y/n) couldn't help, she has literally no choice, but to cheer him up by leaning in and patting his shoulder saying "It's still not half of the season right?, you can do it" the girl encourage the driver chuckling a bit

"Anyways how's your life in general?" Charles questioned the singer smiling at her softly, he was genuinely curious on what's happening her life after not seeing her for 2 years and a half

"good, I think I've change quite a lot after the split" (Y/n) answered "How about you?" she questioned sipping her tea "Well I can say the same thing to myself" Charles chuckled a questioned suddenly popped on his mind and it was a risky one...

"Can I be honest?, after our relationship ... did the question 'Maybe we should've worked our differences rather than splitting?" Charles sighed deeply after saying that, god he knew this was so random and out of the bag but he wanted to know

(Y/n) just nodded, she didn't know what words to say at that exact moment, she was shocked truly, but it was true her 19 year old self should've fought to make their relationship better but it was too late now, they have their own spouses and different lives and reputations to live up to

And Charles knew that, he knew that from the bottom of his heart, no matter how much he admired her as a person and an ex lover, he couldn't see himself falling in love with her again.

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I have this dream you're doing cool shit, having adventures on your own

August 12, 2023: two years after the break up.

"Give it up for [stage name]" the host introduces (Y/n) to the audience holding the artist's new album the camera pans to (Y/n) as she started singing a new song from her album

It has been a two years after the break up between one of the IT couples of formula 1, (Y/n) (Y/l/n) and Charles Leclerc, they had dated for almost 3 years before ending their relationship, and between those two years alot had changed.

Charles became one of the most popular and successful formula 1 driver this generation, and is thriving on his own.

your.username‎

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your.username‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ playin' in the Jimmy Fallon show tonight 😱 (and also thanks for the over flowing support for (your nickname)topia!)

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While (Y/n) despite having a hiatus, her career in the music industry is sky rocketing, brand deals, guestings and shows left and right.

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You meet some woman on the internet and take her home

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You know the greatest loves of all time are over now

flashback to the night they fell apart.

"You know what?, I'm so fucking tired of this relationship, if you can't stay your fucking penis in your pants I might just fucking cut it and this relationship at this point." (Y/n) screamed as tears started to fall from her eyes to her cheeks accusingly pointing a finger to Charles, she seen him with her friend again, Alexandra.

"Darling, is it so bad that I hang out with your friend? I mean my friends are your friends too right? Why can't I do the same thing?" Charles tried explaining his side, I mean it's normal to kiss your girlfriend's friend in the neck and basically caress their back

"That's what you call a hang out? You're basically flirting with each other, gosh, I thought I could trust you!" the singer says frustrated, she thought that Charles was different, a Gentleman but she thought wrong, Charles tried hugging her but she pushed him away

"Darling I—" Charles tried to reason more but (Y/n) stopped him for explaining more nonsense.

"You and me, we're done" (Y/n) sighed as she gets her purse from the gray couch and started heading to their shared penthouse's front door

But before she leaves for good from this apartment and their relationship "be fucking ready asshole" the singer spat closing the door loudly, Charles couldn't do anything but just sit on the floor and contemplate, what the fuck did she meant by 'be ready'

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If one thing had been different, would everything be different today?

present times.

A few hours later, the city lights were slowly starts to fade into the darkness of the night and the only thing that illuminates the light was the moon and the loudness of the streets from earlier that can be heard even in the most secluded part of the cafe was long gone now and is replaced by the jazz music player in the speaker of the cafe.

"It was actually nice to see you after what happened between us" Charles sincerely looked at his former girlfriend and potential friend "You don't know how much this conversation meant to me, I know I was an asshole but you giving me a chance to catch up with you was everything I wished for" he continued speaking with sincerity as he thanked the girl, Charles was truly thankful.

"I would say the same, this was a fulfilling way to face our unresolved conflict in our relationship" (Y/n) agreed on what the driver had said as she offered her hand to him

"well it was nice to see you Charles, you were a wonderful experience in my life"

Charles shaked the singer's hand and he hugged her suddenly, he couldn't contain himself, she became his everything in his life even if it was only temporarily and he treasures her for that.

"Thank you" Charles whispered to the singer's ear before he let go of her, as they leave to go on their seperate ways.

As the night concludes for the ex couple, one thing that they have in their mind their love maybe called a folktale, they believed the stories from their parents that they were meant to be and would marry each other and grow old together however destiny had different plans, and since one was too reckless and the other was too calculated.

But would there be a different outcome if they would be someone different from who they are now? would they be together in this lifetime if they were just simple folks?

They might not now the answer to that as we do too but as the words go "if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow and it's alright now."

Growth helps people to become better for themselves and for others, even if (Y/n) and Charles didn't end up together as they believed they would, they had become better and fulfilled things on their own and maybe in the next life when everything is different they may achieve the same things but hand in hand.

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liked by golitsynroyals, madisonbeer and 6,787,345 others

your.username‎‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ since y'all missed my dumps and this guy's @princenicholasofrussia first time attending my concert

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madisonbeer‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ rockstar gf + softie bf trope 😭

your.username‎‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ he's the king of sass let me tell you

shuriju‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ I missed your dumps mom!!

princenicny/n‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ AAAA the (shipname) crumbs that I'd die for

yukitsunoda0511‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ soft launch my ass

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[0oolookitsme]

Falling in Love

Type- One-Shoty Blurb

Verse- Singer!Harry x Ceo!Y/n

Word Count- 1.3k

Warnings- Just sweet, sweet fluff and a very light description of the anxiety that comes with falling in love.

A/N- This one, y'all, is a special one.

This fic celebrates more than one occasion. I published my first ever fic on this site on July 20, 2021. And this is also a goodbye to The Love On Tour which ends today, July 22. I chose (Singer!Harry x Ceo!Y/n) for this, because it is the first universe I ever created, and Harry is a singer in this au, so that kind of fit as well. Also, you people never failed to show your favouritism when it came to any fic I posted in this 'verse -- I love you, and thank you so much for that. I'll be honest, this isn't the original the fic I wanted to post today, but I had to because somehow, I wasn't able to finish it in time. Maybe by the next weekend I'll have it finished, don't mark my words on that though.

So, I really hope you enjoy this fic, which depicts a scene from (Singer!Harry x Ceo!Y/n)'s early stages of relationship, when they'd just started falling in love.

I love you and thank you, a LOT ;) -A.

A little out of breadth Y/n climbed in her car, immediately turning on the AC on full. It was a melting hot day in New York, and she couldn't be more frustrated.

Sitting in the car, she switched on her mobile data for her playlist to start singing. But just as she hit play, a text from Harry popped up on her screen, a smile stretching out on her mouth just in time. She scrolled down her notification bar to see what it was, and it made her sad, the fact that she couldn't smile any wider.

Obviously, he was trying to make her insides churn -- why else would he ask her: 'would you like some croissant, mon chouchou?' Her nose scrunched up as she let her head hit the headrest of the seat, trying to swallow down her screech of giddiness.

With fists clenched tight because there was no other way she could express her ecstasy right now, she allowed herself to open her hand and loosen-up her jaw. 'I'd very much love some! Where are you right now?' She texted back, hoping she could pick him up.

Driving out and straight onto the main lane, she stopped about mid-way through, the street packed with cars and bikes.

Y/n looked up once again, to make sure the traffic light really was red, and right as she was about to look back down, they turned green -- and this is the first time she's been mad about that. Tossing her phone on the passenger seat as she turned her car on the left, she hoped that Harry would reply before she reached the U-Cut.

And while her full attention was on the road, she couldn't help but look at her phone screen from the corner of her eyes. Should she just call him? She slowed down her speed, waiting and waiting and immediately stopping on the side of the lane when he finally texted back: 'Cornelia Street, why?'

Her whole face scrunched up in confusion, as she quickly typed: 'what the hell?' She hit send too quickly, but still kept on typing. 'it's like an hour away! how are you gonna make it? the metro-station will shut down soon!' She texted him again, starting her car again to start driving.

The quicker she reached him, the better. She just hoped that she wouldn't have to stop at a red light again.

'I dunno... maybe get an Uber?' Her screen lit up with his text. 'Anyways, which one do you want?' He texted again, this time attaching 2 photos.

Y/n lightly shook her head, not able to believe that she's going to be driving for an hour to pick up this weird man she seems to have developed a huge crush on, when all she wanted to do leaving the office was to pass out on the lovely forest green sofa in her living room. And she only gets more confused when she sees her phone light up from the corner of her eyes again.

'Pick up whichever one you're eating, H' she sent him a voice message, not careless enough to text him that while driving at this speed. But just as she turns on the next road, a groan rumbles from the back of her throat when she sees another traffic-jam. It sure isn't as hideous as the previous one, but it's making her late, nevertheless.

Rien Que Toi et Moi started playing on low volume in the car as she picked her phone again, going straight to the text Harry had sent her.

'okay, you're clearly too busy to type 'gruyere croissant'. So, I will buy it for you even though I'm taking a chocolate one' was the first text, and the next one made her grin quite wide in slight embarassment. It said, 'Cause someone needs to be sweet to keep your salty ass sane'

'Don't get all grumpy with me now, we both know you can't live for even a day without salt' she texted back, chuckling already. 'And don't book any taxi, I'm on my way to pick you up!' She wrote again, now suddenly embarrassed.

This time, she threw her phone on the seat for once and for all, determined to stop only when she's on Cornelia Steet.

And as she drove, her mind was still on Harry. It hadn't escaped her, the fact that he remembered her favourite croissant, and knew she wanted that one only, even when she didn't say so. She knows that he too knows he'll be eating half of hers and then offer her a half of his'. Staying with her, he'd grown to like a lot of her favourites.

But what he's surely got to notice, is that a lot of his favourites, are now Y/n's as well. It's more than often that she's caught doing things that he loves to do, learning about things that he always talks to her about. And she remembered something flashing in his eyes when she told him that she's only doing it so that she can chat a little more about it with him.

Driving with her window rolled down, Y/n slowly and slowly felt herself calming down and little by little, falling for Harry -- with his little quirks and habits that make him who he is. But still there was a slight tightness in the midst of her chest that frightened her, a little alarm that always went off blaring every time her eyes landed on Harry, screaming at her to turn around, that she still had time, and her heartrate would go impossibly high.

But she knew, she had nothing to lose. The most that could happen was that he'd break her heart and people will stop murmuring about how she's got some colour in her face and a small smile on her mouth every time she walked by. And the gossips about her being cold-hearted would return. She didn't have anything more to lose and for some weird reason whenever she saw Harry, something inside her, maybe her heart, pointed at him and whispered without a pause in her ears, 'that's the one, that's the one.'

It's when she passes the board-sign with 'Cornelia Street' written across it that she parks on the side of the lane again. Picking up her phone, she texts Harry 'I'm in front of the 'Books and Lattes' cafe. Where are you?'

And it was like Harry was already on his phone because he responded right away. 'Should be visible on the first zebra-crossing you stop at!' his text said, and all of a sudden, a hint of giddiness bubbled inside her at the realization that finally she'll be seeing him.

And Y/n did see him, just as she slowed down as she neared the crossing. She looked to her left fist, out the passenger side window and in a split second her eyes found the pair of forest-green eyes that she longed to take a walk in all the damn time.

His Cheshire-cat grin so charming, it felt as though he had aimed it straight at heart, as he walked towards her. And just to poke fun at him, she didn't unlock the door -- rolling down the window instead. He waved at her with a dimpled smile, just a few steps away and as he went to open the door, "hey there, beau" she teased.

Harry rested his elbows on the sill, looking at her with a mockingly intense gaze. "Lose your croissant or unlock the door," he said quickly and laughed at her groan as he went to sit beside her. "I'm hurt that you'd choose a croissant over me!"

"I'm surprised that you're surprised," Y/n said, while backing up just a bit to turn into the other lane.

She heard him sigh and then saw him dramatically rub his forehead. "Disappointed, but not surprised," he said.

"Oh, c'mon darling-"

"I'm not your darling when 'm pissed at you!"

Letting out an amused laugh, she intertwined their hands in the heat of the moment, and that same old alarm went off blaring. "Now look who's being salty," she stated as a matter of fact, shaking her head when Harry muttered, 'you're never going to let that go, are you?'

And somewhere on the inside, a little voice in her head mumbled, "uh oh, I'm falling in love."

Tagging: @reveriehs <3 MASTERLIST :)

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not reversing?

I mean, the answer is yes it was petty but here's a low stakes one you can argue about.

Here's is the scene:

I (F) am driving home from work. Like many people I live in a place where there are many houses where lots of people live and in this case the main parking is on street. This is fine- there's a bit of alternating sides at one end, a few gaps for the odd driveway, mostly if someone comes along and it's their right of way but you're already heading past the parked cars they'll wait, it's almost always fine.

It's a Saturday. I work weekends. It has been a long day at work. I can almost see my front door. I am moving along, there's parked cars on the other side, lots because it is a weekend and most people have not been to work, but it's my right of way. I'm over halfway.

There's a small junction at the end of this line of parked cars. Sometimes people pull out, but they mostly creep past the cars, and if they do pull too far most people will pull back in to wait for like 20 extra seconds while the person who is already there goes past.

This time someone pulls out and puts her foot down and pushes onto my side of the road next to the parked cars.

I brake.

She sits there. We cannot go anywhere until someone reverses.

She inches forward.

I do not move.

She sits there.

I sit there. I could just reverse. Normally I would. But she pulled out, she definitely saw me because she sped up to I guess make me who had clearly seen her pull out think she'd been there the whole time? Ma'am it's a straight bit of road obviously I could see it was clear before I started moving past the cars. I would have to reverse back ten car lengths and almost pull into a small driveway. She has to reverse two and pull back into the large gap she just pulled out of.

So we sit there.

She glares and starts reversing.

She proceeds to do the single shittiest job reversing I have ever seen. She keeps turning to basically full lock, almost hits three cars somehow, and just keeps making it worse.

I could have reversed and been home by now, I think. But also that's clearly what she wants, me to give up and reverse.

So I sit there.

She eventually does just pull back into the gap she pulled out of, I drive past, put my hand up to say thank you, and she gives me a dirty look, she goes off down the road and I go home, get out my work clothes, and make a cheese sandwich.

I could have just reversed, but I stubbornly sat there, and I'm pretty sure reversing like that was also her being petty because no one could possibly be that bad at it and have a drivers license still. In theory I could have been making her late to go somewhere by not moving, whereas I was just going home, but if she had reversed properly it would have been faster than me reversing five times the distance, it's just then she would still be heading forwards, and the fastest thing would have been for her to not pull out on me and wait like 20 seconds for me to drive past the junction anyway.

So how much of a dick move was this I guess

What are these acronyms?

[spicerackofblorbos]

Epilogue

☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x fem!mute!Reader (she/her pronouns), set in a modern semi-fictional world

☾ Summary ➼ Due to childhood trauma, you find yourself an adult without the ability to speak. After years of working on it, you have found ways to live without a voice. Now here in your late 20s, you are 5 months in getting used to a new town. On a fateful day in late November, you and your adopted sister visit a local bookstore-café, unaware of the friendships about to blossom. Throughout the months, one friendship in particular develops into something more.

☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, oblivious feelings, romance, angst, mention of minor character deaths, trauma, illness, adoption, mentions of fire, disabilities, alcohol use, very light nsfw mentions, references to child abuse, smoking and alcohol abuse mentions, domestic violence, light assault, eventual smut

☾ Author's note ➼ Heeeeyy I'm back. If you haven't had an eye on my masterlist for Unspoken Words, you might have missed that I've been working on an epilogue. SURPRISE. If you have, then here it is lol. I am OFFICIALLY done with UW and I'm so sad about it. ALSO for some reason my tumblr app hates me and any time I italicize a line, it italicizes the entire paragraph and I have no idea why. As always, the sign language lines are marked with ' and speaking lines marked with ".

Thank you to anyone who has taken time out of their lives to read my "little" story. I enjoyed writing about this little world and I could not be happier to know that most of you liked reading it. I appreciate you more than you know. Can you believe this is around 100k words? Crazy. Anyways, I'm gonna go write some more, I'll see ya around! <3

☾ Word Count ➼ ~4k

Reddish-orange leaves dance in a unique ballet number past the window you were currently staring out of. You can't keep your fingers from picking at the sleeves of your wool sweater as you wait for your speech therapist to come and get you from the semi-quiet lobby. The only noises you hear comes from the reception desk and the TV mounted opposite of the couch you were waiting on. The weather channel calls for a beautiful weekend with warmer than usual temperatures – which is good considering Halloween is tomorrow.

A side door leading to the back offices opens up, and your name is called from a stout brunette woman with large rimmed glasses and a kind smile. She holds it open as she beckons you forward, and you don't hesitate to smile back as you pick up your bag and make your way through the door and down the familiar hall on her heels.

You’ve been seeing Dr. Boreal for about almost two years now. You started speech therapy shortly after starting trauma therapy – something they had recommended. You weren't quick to decline the suggestion, but you'd be lying if you said you had ever thought about taking back your speech. Some time in your youth, you just assumed it was gone forever. That it was something that couldn't be fixed.

According to Dr. Foust, your trauma therapist, the speech block was mental. Therefore, it was something that could be explored and possibly broken through.

When he had said that, you had newfound hope and suddenly a silent goal to work towards.

It's like clockwork the way you stepped into Dr. Boreal's navy blue office, stepping over to the right and onto the plush cream colored couch meant just for patients. On the walls of her office sits multiple picture frames and motivational posters, all with smiles and bright colors. Her dark curtains sit parted, letting in the afternoon autumn sun that hits the wall next to you. You watch as she grabs the folder with your name on it before sitting in her large red chair and smiling over to you.

“So, how have you been? How was your trip with Levi?”

‘I’m doing well. And It was lovely! You were right, too. The road to Trost is gorgeous this time of year and the trees! So pretty.’ You think back at the little vacation Levi took you on just a week ago. He had taken the scenic route to the little town that you and he had rented a cabin in.

The leaves were at the end of their life and littered the ground wherever you went, crunching underneath your boots. Between the intimate moments and crisp atmosphere, it really was a magical time. Levi practically had to drag you back home.

On the way out, Levi found this adorable tea shop. It's not easy finding a place that made tea as well as he did, and of course he didn't say anything, but you could tell how much he enjoyed it. You won't soon forget the content on his normally stoic face. That reminds you of the little package snuggled in your purse so you reach down into it to pull out a small, rectangular tin.

‘I got this for you.’ You beam at her as you hand it over gently.

“Cranberry autumn tea?” She inspects the wording on the metal, hazel eyes glittering gold in the sunlight that reflects off the container. Her eyes shift to you as a grateful smile lights up her weathered face. “Oh you sweet thing, thank you so much. But you shouldn't have.”

‘As thanks for dealing with me.’ You laugh softly, leaning back into the plush couch.

“You know it's no problem. Even if I wasn't paid, I'd still enjoy your company.” She waves dismissively after setting her gift down on the table in front of her. “So, let's see where we left off last time.”

You pick at the edges of your sleeves once again as you watch her find the right place in her notes. Dr. Boreal is one of the kindest people you've had the pleasure of being around. Though she was being paid to help you, she always did so much more. She was patient with you when you struggled to get past certain goals, and when your voice hurt after a grueling session she would bring you herbal tea with honey to smooth the pain. Levi joked that you liked her tea more than his to which you always rolled your eyes at.

“Well you have made outstanding progress. Of course, there is still plenty we still need to work on. But you're doing well.” She looks down at her papers as she talks, the scratch of her pen fills the silence after she finishes. She looks back up to you. “Have you shown anyone your progress yet?”

Those around you are aware of your long journey through therapy. They even celebrated with you after one year - Hange's idea of course. Your sister couldn't hold it in when you had told them of the progress you've made and the goals you were looking forward to completing in the oncoming sessions.  

What they didn't know was that you were even in speech therapy, and how far in your speech recovery you were. Keeping it secret from Levi was getting harder with every passing week.

‘No, but I plan to soon, I promise.’ You pinch your lips together in a grimace. This has been a threat for the last 6 months but truthfully, you've been too scared to tell anyone. No, not scared. Nervous.

“Well, you know my stance on that. I’m sure they're going to be ecstatic, when you're ready to do so.” Dr. Boreal sets out a recorder to let you hear your voice the way she does, a tool you both found the most helpful when it came to fixing the areas that needed the most work. “Enough of that though, are you ready to start?”

With a confident smile, you open your mouth to speak.

.

A few hours later, you find yourself home and in the kitchen with your mind in another dimension. You’re currently plating up a vegetable tray on a tupperware platter as autumnal lofi weaves through the room from the speakers behind you. You’re so focused on arranging your sliced up miscellaneous veggies that you don't hear the metal key in the front door and the light footsteps of your boyfriend coming home for the evening.

“Hey.” Levi mutters from behind you, snaking his arms around your waist and resting his head on your shoulder to look at what you're doing – not without difficulty, of course. You jump at his sudden proximity causing you to drop the chosen dipping sauces in the middle of the platter, disturbing the once perfect arrangement.

There's a soft sigh from you, but you feel the giddiness at the expected company fluttering in your stomach. Even after a few years, he still gives you that effect. You twist in his arms to face him, and his gray eyes are downturned in concern.  

“Are you okay? Was therapy too much today?” He lessens his grip on you so you can pull your hands up to sign.

Levi Ackerman’s raven hair is slicked back from him running his fingers through it, and the way that it stayed put and the sheen on the strands, you can tell it must be raining. You've been so fixated on making sure it looked good that you hadn't even noticed. His gaze stares into yours as he searches for what might be bothering you, so you give him a reassuring smile.

‘No, it was actually really good. She said I've made a lot of progress.’

“That's good. Did you come home late, or have you been working on this tray the whole time?” He glances over your shoulder at the vegetables now thrown about on the counter.

‘Yes and no. I decided to run by the farmers market for more options. But they didn't have anything we didn't already have.’ You explain, shrugging your shoulders.

The afternoon sun was so nice on your face that you would have been a fool to not take advantage of it - and it's a good thing you did. Your eyes slide to the water droplets that drip down on the outside of the living room windows.

“Hm. Well we need to leave for Hange's party soon and you're not dressed. Let me finish this for you and you go get ready.” He leans in to kiss your forehead before unraveling his arms and pushing you in the direction of the bedroom. You only roll your eyes but make your way to the back as he asked.

Hange's Halloween Bash is something they have been planning for about a year. The moment the decorations went on sale last winter, she snatched up what she could. She said something about starting a new tradition for her friends turned family. Levi wasn't as excited about the prospect of such a social gathering but you were, and that was enough to get him to go.

Not only were you able to get him to go, you were also able to talk him into dressing up with you.  

In front of the mirror, you finish tying up a black corset that wraps around your waist. It helps form-fit the blue long sleeve dress that drops down to your bare ankles with your pair of flats completing the look. You were almost ready – all that was left was the big blue bow that you pinned to the back of your head as best you could. You suppose for a makeshift Ariel, this would do just fine. You almost chuckle at the irony of the characters you suggested to Levi a month ago.

A girl who can't talk and a prince that loved her despite it.

You do a small twirl in the mirror to make sure everything looks right. You almost jump out of your skin at the sudden sight of the person standing in the doorway. Levi leans against the door frame, the corner of his mouth twitching into a small smirk. His hands are in the pockets of his work clothes as he watches you intently, taking in the sight of you. With a hand over your heart, you give him a small frown.

“Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you.” He doesn't sound sorry at all.

‘You are too quiet for your own good. One day you're going to scare me so bad that I'm going to punch you.’ You shake your head but smile anyways. You make your way to the closet to pull out Levi's costume for the night, making sure to grab the red waist sash that threatens to fall to the floor.

“You keep saying that.” He takes the hanger from you but not before leaning in to give you a chaste kiss. With a small laugh, you head out of the bedroom and down the hall back to the kitchen.

On your way there, you take a moment to glance at the framed photographs on the walls. Levi made sure to hang up the pictures he took from his apartment that he shared with Erwin as soon as you both moved in.

There was the one of him, Furlan, and Isabel as well as the one of him and Erwin on graduation day though Levi had persisted with Erwin to keep the latter. His blonde and blue eyed friend told him to take it as he had plenty more photos of the two he could hang up. That didn’t make Levi feel any better and it makes you wonder what photos Levi might be hiding from you.

Dispersed in between those are ones of you and Hange, and some with your shared circle of friends. The last one frames three photo strips next to each other. The first one is from your first Sakura Festival a few years ago where you sat on Levi's lap – both red faced and unaware of the extent of your affections for each other.

The other two are from the same photo booth, taken from the previous and current year. With each year, the smiles and looks of adoration grew. Both, luckily, were without the presence of your sister and Erwin. Surprisingly, it wasn't your idea to go back. As much as Levi did his best to hide his sentimental side, it was always present.  

When you get to the kitchen counter, you see the platter rearranged and closed up with the matching plastic lid. It looks perfect, even better than when you took a crack at it. You also see two cups of tea on the counter, both with steam rising up and dancing in the kitchen lights before dissipating into the air.

With a grin, you reach over to grab what you can only assume is yours based on the light color of your tea then walk around the island to sit on the bar stool, leaning on the counter with the mug in both hands. After your first sip, you sigh happily. It was one of the new teas Levi had brought back from the trip because he couldn't get enough of it. Earthy with hints of floral notes, topped with a citrusy zing.

When you start to wonder if Levi was okay, your eyes catch movement in the hallway. You watch Levi struggle with his sash, the soft grumbling of his irritation coming from under his breath as he tugs on it. Sometimes you never realize how hard it is to do something with less than the normal amount of fingers until it's forced upon you. Of course, Levi was never one to ask for help even after all these years.

Without a second thought, you stand up and make your way over to him. He doesn't fight as you take the fabric from his fingers and tighten it from the back. Tucked into the sash is a white blouse, loose enough to billow in the evening breeze. Black pants and matching boots fit snug against his lower half. When you're done, you turn him to face you to inspect the whole ensemble. With his hair properly slicked back, he was the perfect Prince Eric.

‘You look rather dashing, you know that?’

“Tch.” He rolls his eyes at you, but there's not a trace of annoyance radiating off of him. As much as he hates it, he loves you and would do anything you asked – within reason.

‘Are you almost ready to go?’

“In a few, I didn't just brew this for nothing.” He makes his way to the counter to grab his mug and instead of sitting, he stands propped up against the counter like you were but with his phone in hand.

“Your sister wants to know if you want apple juice or apple cider.” He mutters, his gray eyes flicking up over to you as you make your way over to the seat you were just at to finish your own cup. “Both, right?”

‘How did you know?’ You laugh, but nod in agreement. You watch as his fingers type away, the clicking of the keys filling back empty space. There's barely any sunlight coming through the closed blinds signifying that nightfall was almost here. You just now noticed Levi had gone ahead and turned off everything for you while you were getting ready.

The gut feeling you felt last week is back. There was a moment when Levi drove through the rolling hills, the golden rays of sunset lighting up his face. A moment of peace that washed over you as his soft gaze flitted over to you in the passenger seat for only a second, one hand on the wheel and the other on your thigh.

With a nervous sigh, you reach over and pull down his phone with one finger to get his attention. Instantly he looks at you with worry, his mouth downturned.

“Are you okay?”

‘I bet you love me.’

His eyebrows raise, a little surprised at your random question – at something so obvious that he worries even more that something is wrong.

“What’s this about?”

‘Humor me. I bet you love me.’

“You bet right.” He draws out, confusion lacing his tone. 

‘You have to answer a question now. Since I was right.’

“What do you want to know that you don’t already?” His eyes roll at you again, but he sets his phone and mug down and leans over on his elbows to watch you intently.

‘It’s a simple but very important question, I promise.’

“Tch, okay. Hit me.”

Your eyes are suddenly fixated on the fridge to the right of you, the heat of his stare making you shy. For a split second, you almost chicken out. With your heart in your throat, you feel as if you're going to choke as your pulse quickens. Can you do this? Were you ready for this? You were quite tired after today, maybe it's best saved for another day. These thoughts race loudly in your head, but the moment you look back up to meet Levi's gaze, they cease to a quiet murmur.

No, you're ready. And you can do this.

With your fingers laced together, you rest your chin on them and continue to look up at Levi's perplexed expression. Your mouth opens and closes a few times before you're finally able to find your voice.

“Will… you marry… me, Levi?” Your voice is scratchy despite the honey tea you drank after your session. It's rough, and to you it's far from pretty. But the change in expression on Levi's face is almost worth it as he stares at you dazed. It's almost funny to see the physical reaction of his brain comprehending what just happened, like a computer crashing and rebooting.

He's reaching over the counter suddenly and cupping your face in his calloused hands. He holds you there as his wide eyes bounce back and forth between yours. You fight back a laugh, your lips pinched together and quivering.

“Do that again. Say my name again.” The urgency in his voice is palpable.

“L…” You take a deep breath and close your eyes, trying to find your voice yet again. It's hard, but you try again anyway. “Levi.” It comes out brittle this time, leaving an uncomfortable pain in its wake.

“How did this happen?” His own voice sounds a little higher than before, and you have to bite back another laugh.

‘I've been working on it alongside my sessions with Foust.’ You've met your vocal quota for the day. Levi's hands stay cupped around your cheeks and he pulls you in until his soft lips touch yours again. Your eyes flutter closed as you kiss him back, feeling the weight of your anxiety lift off your shoulders in an instant.

When he pulls away, his stare is conflicted and before you know it, he's released you and whips around the corner down the hallway. Dread inches its way into your chest where the anxiety was before as you realize he never answered your question. Did he need a moment? Did he even hear what you asked? The shock may have been too much. Your teeth bite into the inside of your cheek as you watch the dark hallway nervously.

A few seconds later, he emerges from the shadows with red creeping from his neck up into his face. He's flustered and holding something small in his hand. It takes you a moment to register what it was, and when you do, you jump to your feet to meet him halfway.

He doesn’t hesitate to open it to you though his fingers tremble ever so slightly. Inside are two golden rings, interlocked together. A small oval ruby sits surrounded by metal vines beset by smaller white diamonds in the shape of leaves. It's simple yet elegant. Your eyes snap up to his, no doubt as big as saucers.

Not only is this ring breathtaking, it's also groundbreaking to you. You've seen this ring box around since before you both had moved in together. It's been in the closet collecting dust, so of course you didn't think anything of it. He's had this ring for a long time, sitting right under your nose.

‘How long were you planning to propose?’

“For a while now. I just didn't know when would be a good time.” He carefully takes out the one with the red ruby and holds it up to you. The kitchen lights glimmer off the smooth surface reflecting red against his fingers. “I can't believe you beat me to it, though.” So he did hear you.

‘I wasn't planning to do it tonight, but I just had a feeling.’

“You never cease to amaze me, you know that?” He leans over to place the ring box onto the side table behind him, then turns to you. Then he does something you've only ever seen in movies – Levi gets down on one knee and the ring out to you.

“Um. I'm not good with things like this. But I just want you to know that I love you. And I've never been more prepared to spend my life with someone, if you'll have me. Will you marry me?” His eyes look away for a second before focusing back on you. Even though you had pretty much said yes when you asked first, he still seemed so nervous.  

To see Levi in such a mess like this in front of you makes that laugh you held back burst forth, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. Speechless again, you reach your hand out to him and just like that, he slides the ring on your finger with ease.

“I- uh, borrowed one of your rings to get it resized.” He mutters as you stare at it curiously. “So, that's a yes right?” Even though you took the ring, you can still hear the anxiety in his voice.

‘Of course, dummy.’ You laugh again before pulling him up on his feet by his collar and into you for another kiss, this time deeper and full of the love that you have for this man. When you pull away, you can't help but stare at the metal hugging your ring finger.

“It was my mom’s, she insisted on me having it. I think she knew.” He grabs your hand and pulls you into him, one hand on your waist and the other cupping your face. “I suppose we should call her tomorrow, yeah?”

You nod sharply, your smile hurting your cheeks, but you don't care. All you feel right now is the same peace you felt last week and excitement for the future ahead. You didn't want anyone else. 

“Say it again?”

“Levi.” He leans in again, hand still on your face as he presses his lips against your once more. There have been many shared kisses since you both became official but this one felt different. You didn't have the words for it, but it was miles away from being bad.

Levi's phone vibrating loudly on the counter disturbs the comfortable silence and you can only sigh. You almost forgot that you had somewhere to be and are reminded by the caller ID flashing your sister's name. In Levi fashion, he ignores it but he does pull away to look at you with a grimace.

“So who’s telling them?” 

☾ Previous Chapter: June - Part 5

[chaotic-on-main]

Epilogue

☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x fem!mute!Reader (she/her pronouns), set in a modern semi-fictional world

☾ Summary ➼ Due to childhood trauma, you find yourself an adult without the ability to speak. After years of working on it, you have found ways to live without a voice. Now here in your late 20s, you are 5 months in getting used to a new town. On a fateful day in late November, you and your adopted sister visit a local bookstore-café, unaware of the friendships about to blossom. Throughout the months, one friendship in particular develops into something more.

☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, oblivious feelings, romance, angst, mention of minor character deaths, trauma, illness, adoption, mentions of fire, disabilities, alcohol use, very light nsfw mentions, references to child abuse, smoking and alcohol abuse mentions, domestic violence, light assault, eventual smut

☾ Author's note ➼ Heeeeyy I'm back. If you haven't had an eye on my masterlist for Unspoken Words, you might have missed that I've been working on an epilogue. SURPRISE. If you have, then here it is lol. I am OFFICIALLY done with UW and I'm so sad about it. ALSO for some reason my tumblr app hates me and any time I italicize a line, it italicizes the entire paragraph and I have no idea why. As always, the sign language lines are marked with ' and speaking lines marked with ".

Thank you to anyone who has taken time out of their lives to read my "little" story. I enjoyed writing about this little world and I could not be happier to know that most of you liked reading it. I appreciate you more than you know. Can you believe this is around 100k words? Crazy. Anyways, I'm gonna go write some more, I'll see ya around! <3

☾ Word Count ➼ ~4k

Reddish-orange leaves dance in a unique ballet number past the window you were currently staring out of. You can't keep your fingers from picking at the sleeves of your wool sweater as you wait for your speech therapist to come and get you from the semi-quiet lobby. The only noises you hear comes from the reception desk and the TV mounted opposite of the couch you were waiting on. The weather channel calls for a beautiful weekend with warmer than usual temperatures – which is good considering Halloween is tomorrow.

A side door leading to the back offices opens up, and your name is called from a stout brunette woman with large rimmed glasses and a kind smile. She holds it open as she beckons you forward, and you don't hesitate to smile back as you pick up your bag and make your way through the door and down the familiar hall on her heels.

You’ve been seeing Dr. Boreal for about almost two years now. You started speech therapy shortly after starting trauma therapy – something they had recommended. You weren't quick to decline the suggestion, but you'd be lying if you said you had ever thought about taking back your speech. Some time in your youth, you just assumed it was gone forever. That it was something that couldn't be fixed.

According to Dr. Foust, your trauma therapist, the speech block was mental. Therefore, it was something that could be explored and possibly broken through.

When he had said that, you had newfound hope and suddenly a silent goal to work towards.

It's like clockwork the way you stepped into Dr. Boreal's navy blue office, stepping over to the right and onto the plush cream colored couch meant just for patients. On the walls of her office sits multiple picture frames and motivational posters, all with smiles and bright colors. Her dark curtains sit parted, letting in the afternoon autumn sun that hits the wall next to you. You watch as she grabs the folder with your name on it before sitting in her large red chair and smiling over to you.

“So, how have you been? How was your trip with Levi?”

‘I’m doing well. And It was lovely! You were right, too. The road to Trost is gorgeous this time of year and the trees! So pretty.’ You think back at the little vacation Levi took you on just a week ago. He had taken the scenic route to the little town that you and he had rented a cabin in.

The leaves were at the end of their life and littered the ground wherever you went, crunching underneath your boots. Between the intimate moments and crisp atmosphere, it really was a magical time. Levi practically had to drag you back home.

On the way out, Levi found this adorable tea shop. It's not easy finding a place that made tea as well as he did, and of course he didn't say anything, but you could tell how much he enjoyed it. You won't soon forget the content on his normally stoic face. That reminds you of the little package snuggled in your purse so you reach down into it to pull out a small, rectangular tin.

‘I got this for you.’ You beam at her as you hand it over gently.

“Cranberry autumn tea?” She inspects the wording on the metal, hazel eyes glittering gold in the sunlight that reflects off the container. Her eyes shift to you as a grateful smile lights up her weathered face. “Oh you sweet thing, thank you so much. But you shouldn't have.”

‘As thanks for dealing with me.’ You laugh softly, leaning back into the plush couch.

“You know it's no problem. Even if I wasn't paid, I'd still enjoy your company.” She waves dismissively after setting her gift down on the table in front of her. “So, let's see where we left off last time.”

You pick at the edges of your sleeves once again as you watch her find the right place in her notes. Dr. Boreal is one of the kindest people you've had the pleasure of being around. Though she was being paid to help you, she always did so much more. She was patient with you when you struggled to get past certain goals, and when your voice hurt after a grueling session she would bring you herbal tea with honey to smooth the pain. Levi joked that you liked her tea more than his to which you always rolled your eyes at.

“Well you have made outstanding progress. Of course, there is still plenty we still need to work on. But you're doing well.” She looks down at her papers as she talks, the scratch of her pen fills the silence after she finishes. She looks back up to you. “Have you shown anyone your progress yet?”

Those around you are aware of your long journey through therapy. They even celebrated with you after one year - Hange's idea of course. Your sister couldn't hold it in when you had told them of the progress you've made and the goals you were looking forward to completing in the oncoming sessions.  

What they didn't know was that you were even in speech therapy, and how far in your speech recovery you were. Keeping it secret from Levi was getting harder with every passing week.

‘No, but I plan to soon, I promise.’ You pinch your lips together in a grimace. This has been a threat for the last 6 months but truthfully, you've been too scared to tell anyone. No, not scared. Nervous.

“Well, you know my stance on that. I’m sure they're going to be ecstatic, when you're ready to do so.” Dr. Boreal sets out a recorder to let you hear your voice the way she does, a tool you both found the most helpful when it came to fixing the areas that needed the most work. “Enough of that though, are you ready to start?”

With a confident smile, you open your mouth to speak.

.

A few hours later, you find yourself home and in the kitchen with your mind in another dimension. You’re currently plating up a vegetable tray on a tupperware platter as autumnal lofi weaves through the room from the speakers behind you. You’re so focused on arranging your sliced up miscellaneous veggies that you don't hear the metal key in the front door and the light footsteps of your boyfriend coming home for the evening.

“Hey.” Levi mutters from behind you, snaking his arms around your waist and resting his head on your shoulder to look at what you're doing – not without difficulty, of course. You jump at his sudden proximity causing you to drop the chosen dipping sauces in the middle of the platter, disturbing the once perfect arrangement.

There's a soft sigh from you, but you feel the giddiness at the expected company fluttering in your stomach. Even after a few years, he still gives you that effect. You twist in his arms to face him, and his gray eyes are downturned in concern.  

“Are you okay? Was therapy too much today?” He lessens his grip on you so you can pull your hands up to sign.

Levi Ackerman’s raven hair is slicked back from him running his fingers through it, and the way that it stayed put and the sheen on the strands, you can tell it must be raining. You've been so fixated on making sure it looked good that you hadn't even noticed. His gaze stares into yours as he searches for what might be bothering you, so you give him a reassuring smile.

‘No, it was actually really good. She said I've made a lot of progress.’

“That's good. Did you come home late, or have you been working on this tray the whole time?” He glances over your shoulder at the vegetables now thrown about on the counter.

‘Yes and no. I decided to run by the farmers market for more options. But they didn't have anything we didn't already have.’ You explain, shrugging your shoulders.

The afternoon sun was so nice on your face that you would have been a fool to not take advantage of it - and it's a good thing you did. Your eyes slide to the water droplets that drip down on the outside of the living room windows.

“Hm. Well we need to leave for Hange's party soon and you're not dressed. Let me finish this for you and you go get ready.” He leans in to kiss your forehead before unraveling his arms and pushing you in the direction of the bedroom. You only roll your eyes but make your way to the back as he asked.

Hange's Halloween Bash is something they have been planning for about a year. The moment the decorations went on sale last winter, she snatched up what she could. She said something about starting a new tradition for her friends turned family. Levi wasn't as excited about the prospect of such a social gathering but you were, and that was enough to get him to go.

Not only were you able to get him to go, you were also able to talk him into dressing up with you.  

In front of the mirror, you finish tying up a black corset that wraps around your waist. It helps form-fit the blue long sleeve dress that drops down to your bare ankles with your pair of flats completing the look. You were almost ready – all that was left was the big blue bow that you pinned to the back of your head as best you could. You suppose for a makeshift Ariel, this would do just fine. You almost chuckle at the irony of the characters you suggested to Levi a month ago.

A girl who can't talk and a prince that loved her despite it.

You do a small twirl in the mirror to make sure everything looks right. You almost jump out of your skin at the sudden sight of the person standing in the doorway. Levi leans against the door frame, the corner of his mouth twitching into a small smirk. His hands are in the pockets of his work clothes as he watches you intently, taking in the sight of you. With a hand over your heart, you give him a small frown.

“Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you.” He doesn't sound sorry at all.

‘You are too quiet for your own good. One day you're going to scare me so bad that I'm going to punch you.��� You shake your head but smile anyways. You make your way to the closet to pull out Levi's costume for the night, making sure to grab the red waist sash that threatens to fall to the floor.

“You keep saying that.” He takes the hanger from you but not before leaning in to give you a chaste kiss. With a small laugh, you head out of the bedroom and down the hall back to the kitchen.

On your way there, you take a moment to glance at the framed photographs on the walls. Levi made sure to hang up the pictures he took from his apartment that he shared with Erwin as soon as you both moved in.

There was the one of him, Furlan, and Isabel as well as the one of him and Erwin on graduation day though Levi had persisted with Erwin to keep the latter. His blonde and blue eyed friend told him to take it as he had plenty more photos of the two he could hang up. That didn’t make Levi feel any better and it makes you wonder what photos Levi might be hiding from you.

Dispersed in between those are ones of you and Hange, and some with your shared circle of friends. The last one frames three photo strips next to each other. The first one is from your first Sakura Festival a few years ago where you sat on Levi's lap – both red faced and unaware of the extent of your affections for each other.

The other two are from the same photo booth, taken from the previous and current year. With each year, the smiles and looks of adoration grew. Both, luckily, were without the presence of your sister and Erwin. Surprisingly, it wasn't your idea to go back. As much as Levi did his best to hide his sentimental side, it was always present.  

When you get to the kitchen counter, you see the platter rearranged and closed up with the matching plastic lid. It looks perfect, even better than when you took a crack at it. You also see two cups of tea on the counter, both with steam rising up and dancing in the kitchen lights before dissipating into the air.

With a grin, you reach over to grab what you can only assume is yours based on the light color of your tea then walk around the island to sit on the bar stool, leaning on the counter with the mug in both hands. After your first sip, you sigh happily. It was one of the new teas Levi had brought back from the trip because he couldn't get enough of it. Earthy with hints of floral notes, topped with a citrusy zing.

When you start to wonder if Levi was okay, your eyes catch movement in the hallway. You watch Levi struggle with his sash, the soft grumbling of his irritation coming from under his breath as he tugs on it. Sometimes you never realize how hard it is to do something with less than the normal amount of fingers until it's forced upon you. Of course, Levi was never one to ask for help even after all these years.

Without a second thought, you stand up and make your way over to him. He doesn't fight as you take the fabric from his fingers and tighten it from the back. Tucked into the sash is a white blouse, loose enough to billow in the evening breeze. Black pants and matching boots fit snug against his lower half. When you're done, you turn him to face you to inspect the whole ensemble. With his hair properly slicked back, he was the perfect Prince Eric.

‘You look rather dashing, you know that?’

“Tch.” He rolls his eyes at you, but there's not a trace of annoyance radiating off of him. As much as he hates it, he loves you and would do anything you asked – within reason.

‘Are you almost ready to go?’

“In a few, I didn't just brew this for nothing.” He makes his way to the counter to grab his mug and instead of sitting, he stands propped up against the counter like you were but with his phone in hand.

“Your sister wants to know if you want apple juice or apple cider.” He mutters, his gray eyes flicking up over to you as you make your way over to the seat you were just at to finish your own cup. “Both, right?”

‘How did you know?’ You laugh, but nod in agreement. You watch as his fingers type away, the clicking of the keys filling back empty space. There's barely any sunlight coming through the closed blinds signifying that nightfall was almost here. You just now noticed Levi had gone ahead and turned off everything for you while you were getting ready.

The gut feeling you felt last week is back. There was a moment when Levi drove through the rolling hills, the golden rays of sunset lighting up his face. A moment of peace that washed over you as his soft gaze flitted over to you in the passenger seat for only a second, one hand on the wheel and the other on your thigh.

With a nervous sigh, you reach over and pull down his phone with one finger to get his attention. Instantly he looks at you with worry, his mouth downturned.

“Are you okay?”

‘I bet you love me.’

His eyebrows raise, a little surprised at your random question – at something so obvious that he worries even more that something is wrong.

“What’s this about?”

‘Humor me. I bet you love me.’

“You bet right.” He draws out, confusion lacing his tone. 

‘You have to answer a question now. Since I was right.’

“What do you want to know that you don’t already?” His eyes roll at you again, but he sets his phone and mug down and leans over on his elbows to watch you intently.

‘It’s a simple but very important question, I promise.’

“Tch, okay. Hit me.”

Your eyes are suddenly fixated on the fridge to the right of you, the heat of his stare making you shy. For a split second, you almost chicken out. With your heart in your throat, you feel as if you're going to choke as your pulse quickens. Can you do this? Were you ready for this? You were quite tired after today, maybe it's best saved for another day. These thoughts race loudly in your head, but the moment you look back up to meet Levi's gaze, they cease to a quiet murmur.

No, you're ready. And you can do this.

With your fingers laced together, you rest your chin on them and continue to look up at Levi's perplexed expression. Your mouth opens and closes a few times before you're finally able to find your voice.

“Will… you marry… me, Levi?” Your voice is scratchy despite the honey tea you drank after your session. It's rough, and to you it's far from pretty. But the change in expression on Levi's face is almost worth it as he stares at you dazed. It's almost funny to see the physical reaction of his brain comprehending what just happened, like a computer crashing and rebooting.

He's reaching over the counter suddenly and cupping your face in his calloused hands. He holds you there as his wide eyes bounce back and forth between yours. You fight back a laugh, your lips pinched together and quivering.

“Do that again. Say my name again.” The urgency in his voice is palpable.

“L…” You take a deep breath and close your eyes, trying to find your voice yet again. It's hard, but you try again anyway. “Levi.” It comes out brittle this time, leaving an uncomfortable pain in its wake.

“How did this happen?” His own voice sounds a little higher than before, and you have to bite back another laugh.

‘I've been working on it alongside my sessions with Foust.’ You've met your vocal quota for the day. Levi's hands stay cupped around your cheeks and he pulls you in until his soft lips touch yours again. Your eyes flutter closed as you kiss him back, feeling the weight of your anxiety lift off your shoulders in an instant.

When he pulls away, his stare is conflicted and before you know it, he's released you and whips around the corner down the hallway. Dread inches its way into your chest where the anxiety was before as you realize he never answered your question. Did he need a moment? Did he even hear what you asked? The shock may have been too much. Your teeth bite into the inside of your cheek as you watch the dark hallway nervously.

A few seconds later, he emerges from the shadows with red creeping from his neck up into his face. He's flustered and holding something small in his hand. It takes you a moment to register what it was, and when you do, you jump to your feet to meet him halfway.

He doesn’t hesitate to open it to you though his fingers tremble ever so slightly. Inside are two golden rings, interlocked together. A small oval ruby sits surrounded by metal vines beset by smaller white diamonds in the shape of leaves. It's simple yet elegant. Your eyes snap up to his, no doubt as big as saucers.

Not only is this ring breathtaking, it's also groundbreaking to you. You've seen this ring box around since before you both had moved in together. It's been in the closet collecting dust, so of course you didn't think anything of it. He's had this ring for a long time, sitting right under your nose.

‘How long were you planning to propose?’

“For a while now. I just didn't know when would be a good time.” He carefully takes out the one with the red ruby and holds it up to you. The kitchen lights glimmer off the smooth surface reflecting red against his fingers. “I can't believe you beat me to it, though.” So he did hear you.

‘I wasn't planning to do it tonight, but I just had a feeling.’

“You never cease to amaze me, you know that?” He leans over to place the ring box onto the side table behind him, then turns to you. Then he does something you've only ever seen in movies – Levi gets down on one knee and the ring out to you.

“Um. I'm not good with things like this. But I just want you to know that I love you. And I've never been more prepared to spend my life with someone, if you'll have me. Will you marry me?” His eyes look away for a second before focusing back on you. Even though you had pretty much said yes when you asked first, he still seemed so nervous.  

To see Levi in such a mess like this in front of you makes that laugh you held back burst forth, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. Speechless again, you reach your hand out to him and just like that, he slides the ring on your finger with ease.

“I- uh, borrowed one of your rings to get it resized.” He mutters as you stare at it curiously. “So, that's a yes right?” Even though you took the ring, you can still hear the anxiety in his voice.

‘Of course, dummy.’ You laugh again before pulling him up on his feet by his collar and into you for another kiss, this time deeper and full of the love that you have for this man. When you pull away, you can't help but stare at the metal hugging your ring finger.

“It was my mom’s, she insisted on me having it. I think she knew.” He grabs your hand and pulls you into him, one hand on your waist and the other cupping your face. “I suppose we should call her tomorrow, yeah?”

You nod sharply, your smile hurting your cheeks, but you don't care. All you feel right now is the same peace you felt last week and excitement for the future ahead. You didn't want anyone else. 

“Say it again?”

“Levi.” He leans in again, hand still on your face as he presses his lips against your once more. There have been many shared kisses since you both became official but this one felt different. You didn't have the words for it, but it was miles away from being bad.

Levi's phone vibrating loudly on the counter disturbs the comfortable silence and you can only sigh. You almost forgot that you had somewhere to be and are reminded by the caller ID flashing your sister's name. In Levi fashion, he ignores it but he does pull away to look at you with a grimace.

“So who’s telling them?” 

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☾ Previous Chapter: June - Part 5

[octuscle]

Uhm chronivac support?

I have a bit of a personal request. You see, I love body hair and facial hair. i L O V E it. But i am at a bit of an impasse. I have not a whole lot of body hair and I can't really grow anything on my face that isn't patchy.

Most preset I see only gives 5 o'clock shadow so I wondered if they're were any presets or package I could use to make sure I grow hairy and have a luxurious beard and a nice stache?

I want to be beastly, bearish. I want to be able to stay warm withou any shirts on. I want to be so hairy that I need to comb my fur.

The first thing you notice in the morning when you brush your teeth is your hair under your armpits. You had trimmed them a few days ago… And now there is a bush again. Shit, you're already late anyway, the first lecture starts in 20 minutes, you'll take care of that later.

During the lecture you are totally unfocused. What do you care about European history… You are interested in your dick. It is permanently hard. Shit, you mumble an apology and disappear to the toilet. You've never jerked off on campus. But once is the first time. As you open your pants, you smell a waft of sweat and musk. Your cock is hairy, your balls are hairy, your pubic hair is bushy. It doesn't take you long to cum. And your cum clumps the hair around your cock. You rub your smeared hand on your fine rib undershirt. Fuck, didn't you have a normal t-shirt on today? No, you always wear wifebeater. You open the second button of your button-down oxford shirt, so that your undershirt is visible. There are a few hairs curling on your chest.

With effort you have struggled through the morning. Now you're hungry. A ravenous appetite. But not for the vegan organic crap from the cafeteria. You get into your Prius and drive to a diner. It smells like barbecue and frying fat. Yes, that's what you're hungry for now. A huge portion of spare ribs and fries. And a large Coke. With sugar. No diet crap. As the waitress serves the portion, you can already see that the meal is going to be a mess. The sauce looks delicious. And there's plenty of it. To be on the safe side, you take off your shirt and hang it over the back of the chair. Most of the other guests seem to be long-distance drivers, they don't care. The waitress doesn't either. After the third portion is served, she even pats you on the head and says she loves a big lad with a good appetite. The patting feels strange. You run your sauce-smeared hand first over your stained undershirt and then over your head. "Wayul, it gist feels lahk whut uh bald head feels lahk," you mumble to yourself as the food rests hang in your beard.

The third serving is also your last. Fuck, now you're finally full. Your belly is bulging out between the waistband of your jeans and your wifebeater. You tuck your hairy belly and let out a mega burp. Yelling, laughing, applause in the diner. You laugh too. In a booming bass. You also have to fart. But you go to the bathroom to do it. You also have to piss before you have to go back on the road. You wash out your sauce-smeared undershirt briefly in the sink and hang it on your belt. It dries in the breeze afterwards.

Back at your seat, there's a college boy. Clean-shaven with a freshly ironed shirt. Wimp! You tell him he's sitting in your chair. He looks up at you.

The arrogant snob says that maybe it used to be your chair and if your seat wasn't on some combine. You bend down to him, pull your jeans vest off the back of his chair and maybe you wouldn't have had to press your armpit on his face. But you're just a dumb, clumsy trucker, not a cool college boy. You bend down to him again after you have put on the vest, burp in his face and mumble an "'Scuse may, mister".

You say goodbye to Maggie with a kiss on the cheek. She is your favorite waitress. It's always nice when a tour brings you here. But now you have to go. Your 36-ton baby has to get to Austin today.

Best bears always @once-a-cub

[misc-obeyme]

HI HELLO IM BACK, I HAVE MY NOTES WHEEE. I had to go back and re-read where i left off. ajsjd idk if anyone else is waiting for updates on my silly little poly story but here is the next part

I mention this diner that's open, and Solomon cuts in like "That's right, didn't you say they had the best cake batter milkshake you've ever had? And I recall you gushing about the food, specifically the mozzarella sticks." "It's the same one ya showed the menu off to us and how they had 20 something flavors, ain't it?" "And Mammon, you wanted to try the cinnamon one, right?" *Cue Mammon looking perplexed*"Sol, wha... Yeah, I-I mean, how the hell did you remember that? I said it so long ago.." "It's easy to remember the things my favorite people enjoy. :]"

How to make two people tsunderes short circuit 101. I'd like to think this is the realization for both me and Mammon about Solomon. Mammon does his little scoff and tries to play it off and it backfires, "So what you're sayin' is, I'm always on your mind?" "Hm. Yes. That feels accurate." "EH?!?" Meanwhile, I'm definitely trying to tamp down the feeling and shove it in a box.

Basically Mammon is "Oh. Oh." and I am "Oh. Oh. Aw, fuck."

okay but Mammon drives us to the diner and we sit in a booth, and they're sitting on the same side and we each other a milkshake and fries to share !! Mammon takes a fry, throws it in the air, and catches it in his mouth. Unfortunately it's hot as hell since it's fresh so he's fanning his mouth and dying internally, peak dumbass. Solomon and I can't help but laugh, and I find myself laughing a little too hard and oh. There's this realization that feels like a cold bucket of water and I'm all "Oh. Oh.. Oh, shit." because HELLO? WHY CAN I FEEL THE FONDNESS IN MY OWN GAZE WHEN I LOOK AT THESE TWO DORKS, MY FACE FEELS HOT, AAAA.

I immediately rip open my straw and focus on my milkshake, trying to convince myself I'm in a silly goofy mood. And idk why, but I can't stand cherries. Cherry flavored things? Awesome. Cherries? No. So i end up placing the cherry on a napkin but I keep the stem (you know where this is going). Solomon sneakily takes the cherry, as Mammon is already sipping his cinnamon shake (definitely horchata flavored).

Solomon pops the it into his mouth at the same time I present the cherry stem now tied into a knot on the tip of my tongue, and suddenly both of them are flustered and choking. (I've only been able to do this once irl, BUT I CAN SAY I'VE DONE IT)

Anyway I'm stuck between laughing so hard I snort, and reaching my hands out towards them both across the table in concern. I try calming myself down, but one look at their red cheeks and I'm a mess again. I think Mammon would flick me on the forehead and say something about my milkshake melting if I don't stop giggling. We end up leaving slightly after 2 am.

We're all in the car, Mammon is driving along the highway. Stars are out, windows down, and the radio is blasting. And then fall out boy comes on !! Because when that band plays, I turn into a different person.

Of course I'm giddy as hell, and Mammon even reaches over to turn it up. You know what's playing? Favorite Record (that just feels like such a fitting song). Mammon and Solomon's eyes meet in the mirror, and there's no words spoken, but everything was said. Because Mammon said he was just playing stuff from his liked songs. Which means, he either lied and made a playlist for tonight OR he started listening to them because I enjoy them so much (it's the second reason)

And in the beginning, I was kinda humming and mumbling the lyrics as I progressively get more confident. But when it got near the chorus, I can't help myself. Suddenly I'm happily singing along, loud and unashamed.

Mammon feels his heart stutter. The roads are empty, so he sneaks a glance at me. And he wonders if this is love, or the beginnings. Because oh. Oh. He's never seen me so carefree. This is his realization moment. And he vows to get to know more songs if it means having another moment like this. Solomon is in the backseat, recording because he's never seen me so energetic before (unless I was gushing about an interest, but there's still a sense of hesitation when I do). Don't mind him, he's making a mental note to google karaoke clubs.

I'm partly embarrassed when the song ends, but no one says anything, so I calm down pretty quickly. It's not long before we arrive at Mammon's apartment/shop. Solomon and I grab our things from the trunk, and follow Mammon inside.

okay that's it for now !! sleepover is next !! i think playlist drama comes after ?? I can't remember. This got long ajsjd. Also I'm making an outline of the songfic, so the bullying kinda worked. I was daydreaming about it on the bus. It WAS gonna be a Mammon pov thing about my mc or maybe reader, but now I'm like 🤨 what if... solomams.... the lyrics fit more for them together... I could write two fics but they'd be basically the same with minor differences. Hmm. Who knows. We'll see. Also my friend/coworker made me some decorations to put on my bag that were solomon and mammon inspired 😭 so sweet. OKAY BYEEE I'M FR DONE NOW AJSJD

- ✨ anon

Ahhhhh Solomon flirting with you two is the cutest thing EVER.

Also who do I have to kill to get a horchata flavored milkshake?? Because that sounds like the most delicious thing I've ever heard of in my life.

I am LIVING for these realization moments!! You singing your heart out to one of your favorite songs a;ldskjfljkdfjkdf

This is so cute I'm dying! I don't know about everybody else, but I am fully invested in this story and I will not be satisfied until I know how the whole thing goes!!

You've fully converted me into a solomams shipper, too, by the way. It's because I just LOVE the way Solomon teases Mammon in a flirty way, that is seriously so cute! But I gotta say, it's even better with your MC involved...

I await the sleepover with baited breath!

[scknight05]

There are a lot of times I wish my life had taken a different course and I wouldn’t be where I am now. It feels like it’s mostly bad, but there are some good things scattered through there. I’ve made some awesome friends that I probably wouldn’t have made if things haven’t gone the way they have the last 10 years or so. But that still doesn’t mean I don’t feel like a complete failure. Or having to deal with feelings like I’m feeling right now.

Long story short: I started watching 9-1-1 Lonestar. I’ve only made it through the second episode. Decided to take advantage of my parents being away to have some me time (since my computer and TV are in the living room because my room A) doesn’t have the space B) isn’t capable of handling those items due to the age of the place we live) and fired up Hulu on my TV. About 10 minutes or so from the end of the second episode, they come back. My mom is amazing. I love her to death and she’s the main reason I’ve made a lot of the choices, good or bad (but not blaming her for the bad ones, those are on me), that have led me to where I am. My dad on the other hand.. well that’s another story that I may save for if I ever decide to try to go to therapy or something.

Anyway.. around the time they get back, it’s gets to a scene where TK shows up to Carlos’ house and they start kissing. As I’m sitting at my computer, my father is in his chair, which is literally on the opposite side of my computer monitors and I hear “Queers. Bunch of queers”

And I kinda snapped. Not throwing anything but believe me I wanted to. I just very loudly said “Excuse me?” And he didn’t reply but I didn’t leave it alone. I kept going “You wanna run that back by me again?”

Mom was in the kitchen and heard and asked what was wrong. And I very loudly said “The old redneck apparently has a problem that two of the main characters are gay and are kissing.”

And now he’s in another one of his manchild moods where he’s not talking. Or at least not talking to me, but he’ll end up saying something to my mom and then find someway to complain about me not respecting him. So he’s doing what he does best. He’s gone to his bedroom and is lying down, either trying to go to sleep or pretending to be asleep.

I know I would probably be a completely different person than I am right now had certain things in my life differently years ago, but damn sometimes do I wish that they did. I don’t know.. maybe this is just another bump in the road to trying to figure out my life.. But I hope I get some clear and concise directions soon. I’ll be 37 this year and feel like I’m a complete waste of space and an absolute failure, especially when I look around and see people in their mid to late 20s that seem like they have it all: love, happiness, a carefree life… I just want a fraction of that… To feel SOMETHING other than the darkness.

[godblessyoublackemperor]

stratford on avon travelogue aka benny's really good super nice day (part 1 of 2)

IIIIIII decided to go to stratford on avon today bc i've been meaning to go for a while and I've got this week off (birthday tomorrowwwww) - cham was gonna come too but had a bit too much work so it was just me, and I was slightly apprehensive about that but i actually had an incredible day and I'm going to tell you all about it RIGHT NOW

I left the house at noonish, its a roughly 45min drive from worcester and the drive was actually really nice, all relatively fast b roads/country lanes. I didn't really have a plan for the day other than just walk around, maybe see some shakespeare shit, otherwise just see my little lizard brain took me, so I just set the sat nav for "stratford on avon" and set off. When i got to the town outskirts i immediately saw signs for anne hathaway's cottage so i was like "yeah aight" and turned off, went down some cute semi-rural residential streets and arrived in a nice green leafy neighbourhood with a nearly deserted car park (no bank holiday today in the uk, we have it next monday). I noticed the minimum stay was 3 hrs so i was like hmmmmm and then when i got to the cottage it turns out you can buy a ticket that gets you into all three shakespeare places (anne's cottage, his birthplace, his new place) so I was like hmmmmmmmmmmm *a plan is forming*.

watch out 🐊

I wandered round the orchard/outsidey bits (a little sculpture/statue trail of shakepeare-y stuff) and did a very speedrun-y tour of the cottage itself - I wasn't super invested or bothered about Learning I just felt like being a tourist and it was honestly super fun to just be like no thanks i don't want any information :) i'll just walk around :)

falstaff's belley, also bees

it's nice she could afford such a cool place, she was good in interstellar

After maybe less than hour I emerged from ann hathaway's cottage and by that time the plan had cemented - I was going to go and see how many of shakespeare's three cribs I could see in a day. I didn't actually need to do this because the ticket is valid for a year but it felt like a fun little goal. I also noted there was a handy signposted route into the town centre so I opted to leave the car there and walk - I both did and didn't regret this decision later.

The walk into town was mostly along a long straight boring road but I did see a cool graveyard and a euphemistically named "SCULPTORS" workshop not far away. The walk in total was probably about 15-20 mins but it felt a bit longer, i eventually got bored and wandered off down a side road and finally got spat out of the sleepy residential streets just in front of Holy Trinity church:

(i didn't know that was what it was immediately, again fully did not plan or research anything beforehand, anyway it is apparently a Landmark so, great 👍)

From here it was a short walk along the river, and by that point i was falling slightly in love with the place already - the weather was just sunny enough, it wasn't too busy, people were boating on the river, there were swans and geese everywhere. After a few minutes I saw these and my original plan to visit some dead bloke's houses sort of got back burnered:

When I saw the boats for hire sign my little lizard brain immediately decided it wanted nothing more in the whole wide world than to go on a little boat on the river avon. I thought "yeah aight" and wondered off to find the actual hire point, these were just moored here and the wasn't anyone actually around to hire them out to me.

on the way i went past some big theatre place? i think it was something to with the dead bloke, idk i was thinking about boats.

a couple more minutes of boat focused wandering brought me to the boathouse (on the right^) which was deserted except for the staff who were all sitting on the veranda eating hula hoops. they seemed mildly surprised that i wanted to hire a boat, and explained that they only electric motorboats for hire that day. I had already seen the sign advertising the option between analogue and electric and i was like "yeah aight", so i paid the man and hopped aboard. I was given a brief how-to, and here i should maybe explain I have not been on any kind of boat in a very long time, my experience extends to heavily supervised rowing on a canal as a kid and one (1) time having a brief go at the wheel of a motorboat on a scottish loch when i was 13ish. None of this really swayed or discouraged me however, so consumed was i with the lizard brain instruction to Go on A Boat. I gamely took in the safety briefing which amounted to lever forward go faster, lever back go slower/reverse, turn to wheel to steer, dont fall in (I'll try not to, i responded cheerily, like a real adult), and I was on my way.

aboard the good ship "number 27"

it took me a couple of minutes to get the hang of the steering, but its top speed wasn't too fast and it actually handled really nicely and responsively so the learning curve wasn't too steep, and pretty soon I was whirring happly along

On the return leg I was just working out how to correct after my big u turn (i only had the boat for 30 mins and was only allowed on a short section of the river) when i spotted something odd and brown on the near side of the riverbank and i was like, is that a fucking otter, and lads IT WAS AN OTTER

i look really unexcited here bc i'm trying operate a phone camera at the same time as controlling an unfamiliar vehicle, and trying not to plough said vehicle into said otter. the otter looks really unexcited here bc im just a twat in a boat and it sees those all the time.

The rest of my journey was uneventful but very pleasant, once i got the hang it was a very relaxing and centering activity and i will definitely be back. I brought the boat back right side up and with me still dry and in it, which the dudes at the boat hire seemed pretty happy about, and they were even happier when i showed them the video of the otter.

From here I sort of just wandered around a bit more? By now it was approaching 4 o'clock and S on A is apparently one of those towns where everything shuts down from like 4 to 5, so it was pretty quiet. I wandered up the high street, wandered into a hi fi store, gawked at some turntables, wandered into a weird little "vintage store", took a picture of a tuba, left, wandered around a bit more, and then walked past a japanese restaurant and stopped and was like hmmmmmmmm.

bonus toilet selfie bc i was feeling myself this day.

It wasn't opening until 5 but i now had a plan formed (completely forgotten about the dead guy's digs by now). I wandered back towards the river, found a gelato place, got gelato (elderflower, battenberg and salted caramel, don't question me), and went and ate the gelato with my legs dangling off the steps by the river OH NO I HIT THE IMAGE LIMIT OK PART 1 OF 2 I GUESS

[aonoexpat]

22-10-2023

All right, another night, another blog!

First and foremost, something I completely forgot to share before: during my stay in Wānaka I was lucky enough to go to a comedy show, and see David Correos and Taylor Ruddle! Definitely look them up for some good laughs 😆

Anyway, back to the present moment: after the sun had finally started shining down on Kumara again, my two new friends and I headed off into the same direction. I took a little detour to get a closer look at Lake Brunner, which was a calming sight:

The winding road took me back to the coast, and I now fully understand why people have described this as the most beautiful coastal road in Aotearoa. The rolling hills leading almost directly to stony beaches, with jagged rock formations jutting out of the glittering shallow waves, made for a magical background that I struggled to pull my eyes away from to attend to the road. With such beautiful weather and a trip like that, all seemed right with the world 😌

At one of the many viewpoints along the road, a Tūī was posing so perfectly in front of the beautiful scenery that I had to take 30+ pictures. Here's two:

My friends and I met up again in Punakaiki, because one of them had had the brilliant idea to go kayaking up the Paparoa river. Unfortunately I saw a very familiar van in the parking lot of the canoe place: as it turned out I had caught up with the (second) guy I had been hoping to never see again. And as bad luck would have it, he was just coming back from the river as I was putting on my life jacket. Luckily I wasn't alone anymore, and one of my friends shielded me from sight. When he was gone I explained the situation to the guy who ran the kayak rental place, who was very caring and understanding. I shook off the unsettling reunion and got into the water, ready for a day on the river with my friends. It didn't take long for me to get properly distracted, because the views were absolutely stunning! On both sides of the river, huge rock cliffs rose up into the sky. Believe me, the pictures do not do it justice. The kayaking itself was rather challenging, as we went upstream first. There were some strong rapids that took a lot of strength to kayak up. The water was freezing cold, and some parts of the river were too shallow for us to stay in the kayaks. We had to get out and drag them across the rocks until the water got deeper again. I was glad there didn't seem to be any sandflies on the water at all, and besides the many pūtangitangi we even saw a matuku moana, which was really cool! One of my friends had never kayaked before, so at some point she stayed behind on a rocky part of the river while we explored a little further. The river became harder to traverse pretty soon after that though, so we turned back and reunited before sitting back and letting the current bring us back to our starting point. What had taken us two hours to kayak up, took us 20 minutes to go back down!

Even though we were already feeling sore from the paddling, we went on one more little hike along the Truman track. The tide was just on its way out, so the ocean had retreated far enough off of the beach for us to walk along it. The limestone rock formations were still dripping as we walked under them, and we climbed some of them, and found a beautiful little waterfall that created a rainbow in the evening sun. I did try to touch the waterfall, and promptly fell on my butt because my foot found zero traction on the slippery rocks. Lesson learned, and sitting hurt for a day after that!

After we had found a nice spot to stay the night, we took one of our cars out to a beautiful beach, and watched the sunset together. We scavenged for pretty rocks and shells on the beach, took hundreds of pictures, and ran away from the waves like little kids. It felt so good to be with others again, and to get to play like that ❤️

While we were getting back to the car, the guy from the kayak rental place rode by on his bike. He invited us to jam night, which happened to be held right next to where we were parked up for the night! I got super excited, and we quickly drove back to our parking spot. I pulled out all the stops and got dressed up for the occasion before heading over there. We met some locals and some other travelers, all of which were some of the warmest people I have met this whole trip. They were welcoming, kind, generous, and they encouraged me to get up to the stage and sing a few songs. I was a little nervous, which only got worse when I sang my first notes, and could hear every single conversation in the place abruptly die down. All eyes were on me suddenly, and I sang my favourite songs for them, which they really seemed to like! After a couple of songs, a drummer joined me, and then somebody with an electric guitar, and then a pianist. It worked so well so organically, we played in sync together, and I felt so humbled and happy to be there ❤️ I did notice the guy from before had joined the crowd at some point, but he appeared to heed my wishes this time around, and didn't try to approach me all evening.

I soon vacated the stage again to let other people have their go, and I felt so honoured to get positive responses from a bunch of people. They told me a voice like mine was rare, that I should pursue a professional career in music (somebody suggested being a wedding singer and... I'm thinking about it?) and one woman who was going to leave the country the next day thanked me profusely for being there on her last night. Apparently I had looked very comfortable on stage, and I had truly felt that too. This, to me, was a most magical and inspiring night. I ended up staying by the campfire and talking with who had been complete strangers to me mere hours ago about all sorts of things until 02:00, feeling so at home. Truly, if I had to pick a place to live in Aotearoa, this one would be super high on my list. I was so glad to finally be surrounded by good people, and to be able to do my thing, and to be open and inviting without being punished for it, and even better, being rewarded for it. I was proud to see that setting a boundary with that guy had worked this time, and I could freely and safely move about the spaces I wanted to be in despite his presence there. I was cared for, I was looked after, and I felt celebrated ❤️

The highs didn't stop there, because the next day we headed into Punakaiki! First up was a hike along the Paparoa river (that we had kayaked on the day before):

Then, we went to take a proper look at the pancake rocks, the blow holes, and the Punakaiki cavern:

Resuming our way, the next morning we found ourselves craving a shower. While one of my friends went to the local swimming pool, I ticked off something that had been on my travel bucket list since I first started planning to travel in a van on my own: I walked into a hostel I wasn't staying at, and used their bathroom to take a shower. For a goody-two-shoes like me that was a terrifying experience, and I was absolutely sure they were going to see me on the cameras, and be waiting for me outside of the bathroom with the police in tow once I stepped outside. But no such thing happened. I had my shower, I gathered my things, and I just walked right out of there! I couldn't believe I had gotten away with it, and felt so empowered and proud all morning 🥳

I still have a lot more to tell, but I have reached my limit of 30 photos per post, and again I find myself at bed time. I hope to post again soon!

[editorialsonlife]

15.10.23

Aaaaah where to even start at the moment.

The election last night sucked balls. I'm so deeply unimpressed and worried about the future of this country, and the fact that so many people think an individualistic capitalistic hellscape is the only way forward. We've lost sight of the fact that a rising tide lifts all boats, and I'm so worried about the future for our lower income, marginalised, already discriminated against people and what this outcome will mean for them ya know? It's incredibly rough and it's going to be incredibly interesting to see where the next few years lead us.

On a personal level.... it's been a month of chaos. I had a lovely weekend with a friend in sydney, started the antidepressants when I got home (which has been a whole trip that I will delve into more) and then in the same three days, my friend ended up in hospital and was airlifted to our bigger wellington hospital for emergency spinal surgery with a significantly high risk of becoming paraplegic or quadriplegic. It was a really insane, really stressful few days, but damn oh damn did we absolutely have a great time being in the same city again honestly. it was so good seeing her every day for like a week. She ended up having the emergency surgery which went well, but they've identified problems with just about every vertebrae and disk in her spine so that's not great. fortunately, she got quite a lot of function back after her surgery. She's still in for a long road of recovery, but given she was walking around a ward clutching my arm and could barely get 10 steps in before needing to sit she's done amazingly well. This is the girl I hike mountains with, we do yoga, we've done bootcamp and weightlifting and walks and everything in between and I am so terrified for her and her family. so stressful honestly.

That was a super great week to start tablets that make you more deperessed and anxious before they start working adn unfortuantely for me I've hit just about every common side effect and some of the obscure ones as well while I've been onboarding up to a full dose. I'm still not there three weeks in and I probably won't be for another three at the rate I'm going tbh but anyway.

I think it's also starting to sink in just quite how depressed I actually have been for a very long time and there's a bunch of self reckoning and grief that comes with that and its feeling like a whole thing at the moment. I also just cannot. CANNOT. Start things at the moment and it's the actual worst. if I have to deliver something for someone else then I can pull it together briefly (and v last minute) but I cannot get anything done for myself or if there's no impending deadline and all I can say is this better fucking pass really quickly coz I'm not about this life it's incredibly hard to manage.

I also just... do not know who I am anymore or what I like or what I do for fun? All my weekend friends have left and Dave is such a homebody and now I just don't do anything in the weekends? I have no one to go on walks with or get coffee with and its a really weird thing to deal with? I have a load of friends but with Lynaire and Larissa gone, and Shelley constantly in Auckland it's all just completely shifted? I don't like it and I need to do something about it. I also don't know what I do for fun anymore or just for me and I need to find some things like asap.

One of the v interesting things to come out of the Sydney trip tho is that the friend I was visiting is SUCH a gym person and counts macros and gyms every day and even tho I'm like 40kg overweight I absolutely had more endurance than her. We were doing like 20-25,000 steps a day and she was so cooked by the end of it but I still had the energy to go for a swim etc and go for an evening stroll. So I guess there's that even if I am horrendously fat right now.

I dunno what this govt change is gunna do for jobs but I'm finding that a weird thought. I don't know what I'll do for work when I move to palmy or if I wanna retrain or something. Will be weird. who knows. I honestly can't picture anything before T swift in feb next year. the future is just so unknown right now so I guess that'll just keep rolling. time will tell and we'll meet it when it gets here.

that about sums it all up really?