#anyway moon is what made me feel things for this game and it did begin with iggy showing me the way

[shkika]

iggy

[avatar-anna]

When You Fall In Love...

so i've been reading icebreaker and it's been putting me in the hockeyrry mood

part one, part two, bonus, bonus

Harry watched from the empty stands as Y/n ran through her routine for the fifth time. Her teammates had gone home, her coach asked Harry if he would lock up on the way out, and now it was just the two of them in the empty rink. There wasn't even any music playing anymore, Y/n was just skating and performing her tricks as if there was.

Every time she did it, it was flawless. Her routine was fast and intense and incredibly difficult, but Y/n performed with ease every time. She landed her tricks like they were nothing, tricks which Harry now knew the names of and could tell the difference between a lutz and an axel. She was incredible, and he was in awe of her every single time.

But even in her perfection, Y/n had yet to smile once.

Harry decided she'd had enough after she finished her fifth run-through, quickly jogging down to the edge of the rink before she could skate out to the middle again. He leaned over the barricade and kissed the top of her head. This close to her, he could see her rosy cheeks and heaving chest, a sign that her routine did wear her out, despite making it look so effortless.

"You were phenomenal as usual, baby," Harry said while he gathered her things.

"I bobbled a landing and my timing was off for a whole four counts," was her reply.

Harry frowned, not pleased by her recent negativity. Any athlete could be critical of their ability, but Y/n seemed uncharacteristically hard on herself lately, and he had no idea why. "Everything okay?" He asked, shouldering her duffle bag as they walked away from the rink.

"I'm fine."

She certainly didn't sound fine, but Harry decided not to push. Not now, anyway. Changing the subject, he said, "I got an email from the recruiter. I should be receiving my contract soon."

Excitement didn't even begin to cover how Harry had been feeling lately. Last week, he'd met with an agent of a minor league hockey team, one that was a feeder to an NHL team. He expressed their interest in Harry moving to the east coast after graduation and join them for spring training. And after giving it some thought, Harry accepted.

He was over the moon, thrilled that years of hard work was finally paying off. He'd made his passion into a career, and had the potential to really make a name for himself. Life couldn't have been better.

But where Harry seemed to be flying high, Y/n seemed stuck. She was happy for him when he told her the news, had gone out to celebrate with him that night. But something felt off between them. Harry couldn't put a name to it, but he just knew.

"That's great," Y/n said with no amount of enthusiasm in her voice. Harry tried not to take it to heart, she was clearly in a mood from her practice. She was under a lot of pressure too, he reminded himself, and sometimes had a knack for not knowing how to express herself with words.

"Is there something on your mind? You've been quiet recently," he said, hoping he wasn't overstepping her delicate boundary.

Y/n shook her head as she approached her car, sliding into the driver's seat without a word. Harry couldn't help but feel more and more like there was something on her mind, but he let it go again.

Before pulling the car out of the parking lot, Y/n rested her hand over his and leaned in to kiss him. "I'm sorry. I've just got a lot on my mind."

"It's okay. As long as you know you can talk to me about it."

Her throat bobbed, but she nodded, then turned her focus toward the road. Harry filled the silence with rambling. He talked mostly about the NHL, about his contract and where he wanted to live and how everything was happening so fast.

So caught up in trying to break the tension, he didn't notice Y/n's white-knuckle grip on the steering wheel.

*.*

"Styles! What the hell are you doing? Focus up! Let's go!"

Harry rested his hands on his knees, breathing heavily during the brief pause in the game. His eyes flicked up to the stands, searching the crowd for a familiar face, but he didn't see the one he needed the most.

Despite being recruited by a minor league hockey team, Harry was probably having the worst game of his life.

Not one pass connected, he was letting second-rate players get by him, and he'd spent more time in the penalty box than in the actual game. Nothing about this was right, and still all he could do was look for Y/n.

She wasn't there, and even though things had been weird between them recently, he was still surprised. When she wasn't at a competition of her own, Y/n came to every one of Harry's games. It had started out as Harry wanting to impress her, maybe show off a little, and then as time went on and they grew closer and their relationship became more than two people having sex in secret, he wanted her to be there just because it felt good knowing she was watching him play. All his nerves floated away when Y/n was sat in the stands, sometimes in his jersey, cheering him on.

And of course there were times when she couldn't come, but this wasn't one of those times. Y/n had purposely not shown up. He knew they'd fought before the game, but he didn't think she would abandon him just to be petty. They were past that now.

His sole focus should've been on the game he was playing, but instead his mind kept drifting to the fight.

Harry could feel Y/n pulling away from him. He finally felt like he was getting everything he wanted—a spot on a minor league hockey team on the east coast that would eventually lead him to the NHL, graduating with semi-decent grades thanks to Y/n, and of course being with his dream girl. At first, she'd seen him as some douchey athlete that was only good for one thing. He remembered seeing her for the first time their freshman year, performing tricks on the ice that he'd only ever seen on TV, and when he whistled and clapped loudly—perhaps a little obnoxiously—after she'd finished, she'd rolled her eyes at him and told him to fuck off.

It was love at first sight.

Harry had been so careful around Y/n. He played by her rules and followed her lead, trying not to let the comments about them not dating get to him too much. He liked their initial dynamic, finding it funny when he got under her skin because she made it so easy. It became a kind of game, this push and pull that was fun and exciting and eventually led to their arrangement.

He knew that she cared about him on some level, he just needed to bide his time and show her he wasn't who she thought he was. Not entirely, anyway. And when she finally did, and they became more than just people who screwed around, everything was perfect.

They'd been through so much together. Y/n pushed Harry to be better, and he worked with her to master new tricks and nail her routine. There wasn't anyone else who understood his level of commitment to hockey, but she did, and that just made him love her more.

So when he got the call offering him a spot on the minor league team, Y/n was the first person Harry told. She'd been happy for him, and he was over the moon, his mind already making a million plans—where they'd live, her coming to his games, him helping her find a new rink to train at. It felt like the doors to a new and exciting world had opened for them, but she then she started pulling back, and Harry practically watched as that door slammed shut.

Harry pushed himself to focus back on the game, on the hockey stick in his hand and the ice beneath his skates. He felt like it took more effort than it should've to get his head back in the game, but his team managed to pull out a win, and he managed not to get benched before it happened. That didn't stop his coach from ripping him a new one in the locker room, but Harry sat there and took it, shaking his head and promising his piss poor performance would never happen again.

Exhausted both physically and mentally, he trudged out of the locker room and toward the parking lot, debating whether to take the bus home or call an Uber. Even in his senior year, he still didn't have a car, but Y/n was usually there to give him a ride home. To their home. Moving in together for their last year of school seemed like a no-brainer, and it had been amazing so far, though the last week had been kind of a disaster. Harry could feel the tension between them growing, but every time he asked Y/n about it, she'd say she was fine even though they both knew everything was not fine, and the cycle continued. He wanted to be excited, he wanted to celebrate the success he'd managed to create for himself, but he felt rather deflated instead.

To Harry's surprise, Y/n was waiting for him in the parking lot. He didn't hesitate putting his gear in the trunk and coming around to sit in the passenger seat. Y/n leaned in to kiss him immediately holding onto the sides of his face fervently.

"I'm sorry," she breathed. "I'm sorry for not being here tonight and I'm sorry for acting strange, and I'm sorry for—"

"Y/n, what's going on with you?" Harry couldn't help but ask.

"Can we wait until we get home to talk?" She asked. I want to be able to talk to you properly, and I can't if I'm driving.

When Harry nodded, Y/n must've deemed it enough. She peeled away from the rink, silent tension filling the air between once again. It had been following them around all week.

That ended tonight, though. He didn't care how much Y/n hated confrontation or hard conversations. They couldn't move forward if they didn't move past this roadblock first. Harry loved Y/n more than he ever thought possible, and stubborn as she was, he knew she loved him just as much. He would get to the bottom of this, no matter how hard she tried to fight him on the way down.

*.*

"Y/n, you know I would be ecstatic if you'd told me you qualified for the Olympics. This is a huge step in my career! Why can't you be happy for me?"

"I am! God, Harry, I am."

"Then why are you pulling away from me? I feel like I can't be excited about this around you when you're the one person who should understand how this feels."

"I can't do this. I can't have this argument with you," you said, trying to step away from him.

Harry was quick to grab your hands in his, keeping you from walking away. "What aren't you telling me? Do you want to break up?"

"No!

"Do you not love me anymore? What? What is it, Y/n?"

"God, I didn't—I didn't ask for this," you cried, feeling like a damn had burst inside you. It was out now, and now you had to see it through to the end. "I didn't plan on falling in love with you. I wasn't prepared to love you this much. You're the one who wanted to take things further, and now you're—"

You're leaving me, you couldn't bring yourself to say. You really were happy for him. All of his dreams were coming true, and he had an ambition that matched yours, which made you love him more. And now that ambition was taking him far away from you, and you weren't handling it as well as you thought you would.

"Y/n—"

"I'm happy for you, H, I'm so happy for you that I could burst. And maybe even a little jealous," you joked, though there was some truth to what you said. "But I guess I just...I guess I didn't expect to love you this much. And I don't—I don't know what to do because you're going soon and I'm..."

You had no clue, and that alone was terrifying.

At the start of all this, you never imagined falling in love with Harry. He drove you absolutely insane, and despite your physical attraction to him, you kept your distance. But he kept doing these things that made you like him, and eventually care about him, and finally made you fall in love with him. It just wasn't something you saw coming. Love was definitely not on the brain when you met Harry.

Because you knew this moment was inevitable. The moment when one of you would be given an opportunity you couldn't refuse and would pull you away from each other. Once upon a time, you thought you would be given your dream job of a lifetime—competitive skating and hopefully the Olympics—but somewhere down the line, skating stopped bringing you joy, only pressure and anxiety. And now Harry had his dream job on the other side of the country, and you were left to flounder and wonder how you would survive waking up without him next to you.

"You're making it seem like it's a bad thing that you're in love with me," Harry said quietly, but the low tone of his voice didn't hide anything. You knew he was getting upset. After all the avoidance the last week—on your part—yours and his emotions were coming to a head.

"It's not! It's just that you're leaving!" you said, resisting the urge to run a frustrated hand through your hair. "And all week you've talked about how excited to get out of here and leave this all behind and start a new chapter in your life. I mean, would it kill you to act like you're a little torn up about leaving?"

It was so selfish, and you knew it was. It was why you'd been avoiding Harry, this conversation. Harry had every right to be proud and ecstatic for leaving to play in the professional league. He worked so hard, pushed himself farther than anyone you'd ever met, except for maybe you. Your pain was clouding your good sense, and now you'd shown just how horrible you could really be.

You couldn't look him in the eye after saying what you did. Even if it was how you felt, you still felt ashamed for raining on Harry's parade. "Y/n—" he tried to say when you hastily wiped a tear from your eye.

"I shouldn't have said anything. I'm sorry," you said, getting up from the couch and scurrying off to your bedroom.

Flopping on the bed, you pulled the covers over you, trying to hide from everything happening around you. It was too much. Your senior year was supposed to be fun and full of unforgettable memories, not arguments and heartache.

You weren't sure how much time had passed before the door opened and Harry slipped inside. He slid into bed next to you, and you didn't fight it when he rested his face in the crook of your neck. Because despite everything you were feeling, this was all you really needed.

"I'm not leaving you behind," he murmured gently. "You mean too much to me."

You sniffled, and Harry pulled you closer to his chest. "You're going to be thousands of miles away."

"Says who?" he said, kissing your cheek. "Who says you aren't coming with me?"

"And do what?" you huffed, even though the thought slightly lifted your spirits. "Be one of your...puck whatevers and follow you around like a puppy? I need a life of my own too."

You were being stubborn and argumentative and you both knew it. There was some relief in knowing Harry wanted you with him, but you also didn't want to just move because Harry was. You needed purpose, you needed to feel like your life had some sort of direction in it. But it was unfair to put all of that on Harry, and you didn't know how to express how you felt without sounding insane, so instead you said nothing, and that obviously went over brilliantly.

Harry chuckled. "See, because you just said how in love you are with me, I can tell that you're frosty attitude is just an act. Now turn over and look at me."

You reluctantly turned over, brow furrowed exaggeratedly because you couldn't cross your arms over your chest. It used to infuriate you how easily Harry could get under your skin because he knew you so well, that he knew just what to do or say to pull you out of a bad mood. In this moment, you were thankful. He could see past all the harsh words and see to the root of the problem. You'd said some things that were perhaps out of order, but Harry understood. Despite everything, he understood.

"You've worked just as hard as me, Y/n. I want to be there for you the way you've been for me. You can achieve your goals too."

"I just...I don't know if I want to achieve them anymore," you said quietly.

It was the first time you'd said it out loud. Since you'd learned to skate, there had only been one goal: the Olympics. Getting there wasn't just a matter of training, it was about devoting your life to your craft, it was barely having a life outside of training and competitions and giving all your time to winning. And after spending nearly your entire life doing it, you felt yourself slowly burning out. You'd go through your routines flawlessly, but your heart wasn't in it. All you could think about was the future—the next competition, the next training session, the next qualifier. It took seeing Harry so happy about being drafted to the minor leagues to realize the fire had gone out in you. Thinking of Olympic qualifiers and training and affording coaches and costumes and picking the right music only filled you with dread when you should've felt joy.

"Oh."

"But I don't know who I am if I don't have skating."

"You don't have to compete to skate, you know," Harry said. He rested his hand against your cheek, rubbing his thumb along your temple lightly. "You can c—"

"Oh God, don't say coach," you groaned. "It's perfect. You'll be a hockey superstar and I'll be the washed-up figure skater who couldn't handle the pressure of being an athlete and wound up coaching instead."

"I know you're being like this because you're scared, and that's okay," he said. "But I'll help you find a new dream, Y/n. I promise."

You had to blink away tears because your heart couldn't take how much he cared about you. "Even when I've been a complete bitch?"

"You haven't been. I'm sorry if you felt like I was leaving you behind. I guess in my mind we would always be together, no matter where we ended up."

"God I hate how much I love you sometimes," you grumbled while flinging yourself on top of Harry and holding him tight. "It's too much, you're too much, and I can't stand it—"

"There's a compliment in there somewhere, right?" Harry asked, but you could hear the grin in his voice.

Sitting up, you perched yourself on him, your legs straddling his waist. Dipping down, you made sure your noses were brushing, but you didn't close the distance. Not yet. Your heart was racing simply because Harry had been so kind to you, because he knew you so well and said exactly what you needed to hear. It felt ridiculous to know that there was a time when he pissed you off so much you saw red, that his teasing remarks and cocky grin grated on your nerves. Now you didn't want to imagine a life without him.

"I'm sorry for saying all of those things," you murmured. "I really am proud of you. No one deserves this more than you do."

Harry's hand reached up and threaded through your hair, his fingers gentle as they passed over your scalp. "I know you are. And I mean it, Y/n. I'll help you. I know you love to skate, we just have to find a way to channel that into something else. If not coaching, maybe performing?"

"What? Like Disney on Ice?" you asked skeptically, your nose wrinkling at the thought.

Harry shrugged as his hand dipped beneath your shirt to stroke your back. "You'd be a cute princess."

"With my luck, they'd make me a tree."

"Then you'd be the cutest tree there ever was."

Shaking your head, you nudged your nose against his again. "Can we hit pause on talking about the future? I just want to be with you here. Right now."

"Course," Harry said, one corner of his mouth turning up into a crooked grin. "And then maybe we can circle back to you being my puck whatever."

"Shut up."

"Make me!"

And that was something you knew how to do better than your skating routine.

[elliespeach]

no chances part six | ellie williams

pairing: ellie williams x afab reader synopsis: you and ellie are on rival volleyball teams and after letting your competitive nature get the better of both of you, tensions are high on and off the court. warnings: 18+, foul language, implied sexual themes, no smut, fluff after the angst, ellie is a little mean to herself in this part, mentions of weed uhhhh i think thats it? if i missed anything pls let me know authors note: this is the last part guys :)) i wanna do an epilogue but it wont count as a full part really but expect that!! thank you guys so so so much for all the love for this series it really means a lot you have no idea. my bad it took me so long to get this part out, ive been quite busy with life and being sickly but i am so happy to share this with you guys finally !!! i hope it's everything u wanted and more <333 w peace n loveeee

somehow you had managed to keep yourself collected until the end of the game, returning to the gym after splashing some water on your face. ellie never made an appearance, instead remained sulking in her car at how she had treated you. she knew you didn’t deserve that and it haunted her while she drove, alone and in silence. with her absence your team had taken the win but you found it hard to be in a cheerful mood, instead putting on a fake face for your teammates while they were over the moon. the bus ride back was loud and full of energy, everyone was complimenting each other on how they had played, and congratulating each other on a glorious victory. 

at the beginning of the season this would have never bothered you so much. ellie’s words did little to affect you then, but now it took over your mind and her words echoed in your head. her decision to sit out because of you weighed on you heavily and it felt like you were about to burst into tears at any moment. not only sit out, but not show up at all. you’ve always hated her, but the past few months have felt different. felt lighter and more playful, rather than how it was in the beginning. 

staring out of the window, watching the blurry trees zip by while the bus went down the highway, you thought about the hotel. the one little moment you two had shared that wasn’t driven by lust. you weren’t sure what it was that night, but you remember how nice it had felt. seeing her in a completely different light for the first time, wrapped in her arms and just feeling at peace. a tear fell from your eye and you quickly wiped it away, shaking your head and deciding to not think about it right now. 

when you got back into your dorm room, peeling off your clothes and jumping straight into the shower you finally broke down. letting out any and all emotions you had about her. you remained in the shower way longer than you had to, just letting the hot water just run over you. it didn’t bother you until the memory of one of the nights ellie and you had come back here flooded your mind. you had felt extra sweaty from the game and wanted a shower, and ellie didn’t hesitate to join you. she had laughed while stepping into the small shower, “we should conserve water, y’know?” 

that night had been the same as the rest, after the shower she promptly went home, leaving you satisfied but missing something. and that something vanished the second she closed the door behind her. 

with that you ended your shower, stepping out into the cold of your small bathroom. a shiver went through you while you looked in the mirror, seeing how disheveled you looked. it was pitiful to be honest. you thought about texting her, telling her all of the things that crossed your mind as you stood in front of the mirror. how could you say that to me? i was just trying to help. 

only to realize that you didn’t even have her phone number. it made some sense, there wasn’t a need to anyway as you only spoke at games. still, the realization burned in your chest like wildfire and you quickly made a decision. “fuck it–” you said to yourself, throwing off your towel and replacing it with comfortable clothes. thankfully, during one of your new found traditions with ellie, she realized she didn’t bring any of her stash and you had looked a little too disappointed for her liking. she offered her dorm up almost instantly, following it up with a quick and faulty reasoning. you knew exactly where to go. 

within seconds you were in the stairwell, keys jingling in your hand and the sound of your slippers echoing off the walls. you went down three floors all the while rehearsing the speech you were going to give her the second you laid eyes on her. because of me? you didn’t play because of me like it’s my fault that we’re in this fucked up situation? you trotted down the last few steps leading to the exit door. you’re vulnerable enough to have sex with me every week but a conversation is far out of your realm of capabilities i guess. you pushed open the door with a huff. you’re too stupid to realize that we might actually hav–

“can you hold the door for me–” the sound of her voice made you look up from the ground, your pace diminished and you took slow steps out of the door. it shut with a click behind you while you looked into those familiar green eyes. “oh, fuck,” ellie said nervously, she defiantly wasn’t expecting it to be you. 

“what are you doing here?” your eyebrows furrowed, but your tone remained neutral. suddenly feeling the burning in your chest start to evaporate. the lamp posts cast a dim light on her standing on the sidewalk, playing with her fingers nervously and often shifting her weight on either foot. 

“was waiting for someone to let me in–” 

“no i mean, like why are you on my campus?” you asked, swiftly putting your keys in your pocket.

she hesitated, looking down to the ground before back up to you. “i uh, wanted to talk to you–” 

“thats a first,” the words spilled out of your mouth with a sarcastic laugh. 

ellie’s face contorted into a grimace and she shook her head, “whatever, i knew i should’ve just went home.” she spun around, taking only a few short steps down the sidewalk. 

involuntarily your eyes rolled and you jogged to catch up to her, pulling her wrist and turning her back around to you. now only being a few feet apart,  ellie could see the redness in your eyes from crying. being embarrassed you looked to the side and let go of her wrist. “if you wanna talk, let’s talk.” 

she gestured to your pocket where you had placed your keys, “i don’t wanna keep you from wherever you were going,” she tried to deflect.

you blinked, quickly trying to come up with anything besides telling her that you were on your way to give her a piece of your mind. although now standing in her presence everything felt too harsh, all the words you had prepared slipped away from you. “it wasn’t as important,” you shrugged, offering her a faint smile, “we can talk.” 

“so i’m important?” ellie teased, her lips curling at the ends slightly and she stuffed her hands in the pockets of her sweatpants. seeing your smile ignited something inside of her that made her feel softer, more comfortable. 

“didn’t say that,” you quickly rebutted while walking leisurely past her, expecting her to follow you and she did. 

“yeah but, you implied it.” she quipped, coming up beside you and keeping your pace. the lamp posts did little to illuminate the world around you and most of the walkway was dark until you were directly underneath the light. 

you sighed lightheartedly, “yeah, whatever,” you began, taking a beat between your thoughts. “so are you like, gonna apologize for being a total asshole?” 

ellie sucked in a deep breath, looking straight ahead. the cool night breeze was comfortable, but it didn’t stop your face from growing hot with anticipation. “yeah, i’m sorry ‘bout that,” ellie’s voice dropped, the amusement in her tone vanishing with the wind. “i shouldn’t have yelled at you like that.” 

“then why did you?” you asked genuinely, your voice matching hers. your eyes were glued to your feet as they scraped the cement below. 

“i don’t know,” she responded, taking a quick look at you but you didn’t meet her eyes although you could feel her gaze. “i do know that whatever this is between us is confusing–” 

“i’m not confused,” you admitted, playing with your hands. “i don’t think you are exactly that confused either. that conversation by your car a million years ago? you all but told me how you felt, so why is it so much harder for you now?” 

“because someone like you doesn’t need to waste their time with me,” ellie’s eyes diverted to the field beside the sidewalk, staring into the darkness while you finally glanced over to her. “i’ve been awful to you, even before our–” her hands gesture in front of her, “you know.” 

“we’ve both been awful to one another, ellie. somehow none of that changes anything for me, does it for you?” her eyes found yours, now under the glow of the lamp posts her green eyes bore into yours and her expression was one you hadn’t seen before. 

“i don’t want it to,” she started, keeping her gaze on you as you two remained walking forward. her mind was racing, she had been too focused on how she treated you that she didn’t even take into account that it was a two sided street. if she was being honest with herself, she never paid mind to how mean you could be right back to her. it finally registered that no matter what you did to her, her feelings for you would never dissipate. “i meant what i said that night.” 

“about what?” 

“about not wanting to see you upset,” her feet stopped, and you only took another step before noticing, turning to stand in front of her. there was a moment of silence as you looked at her trying to find her words. “i really am sorry for everything.” 

you approached her, standing just inches away. “i’m sorry too,” her eyes wandered up from the ground and into yours yet again, “we really were assholes to each other, huh?” you chuckled lightly, trying to alleviate the heavy mood that had settled around both of you. 

ellie couldn’t help but laugh as well, “yeah, we were.” your hand reached up to her cheek gently and she leaned her head into your hand. “but that all stops, okay? i promise.” ellie’s hand grabbed the wrist that was holding her cheek, rubbing her thumb across your soft skin. 

“i’m not promising anything,” you joked, the tone in your voice going up. “it’s fun to see you all flustered.” 

“oh, so it’s like that?” ellie’s lips turned up at your words and she grasped for your hips but you snaked away. you giggled, playfully turning around to escape her grasp. you made it only a few feet before she had come up behind you, wrapping her arms around your waist. you both fumbled over one another, rolling into the grass beside the sidewalk all while laughing at each other. 

“ellie!” you giggled again, the grass tickling every part of your exposed skin. ellie had landed on top of you, her arm planted firmly in the grass beside your head as she looked down on you and the smile on her face never faltering, along with yours. 

in this moment, it was only you and ellie. everything around the two of you seemed to disappear as you longingly stared into each other. a piece of her hair had fallen from her tight bun and you gently tucked it behind her ear, running your hand along her cheek again. “can i take you on a date? a real one?” she asked in a whisper, never taking her eyes off of you. 

“you don’t even have to ask,” you answered her in the same tone, your chest swelling with her every word. ellie leaned down and planted a soft, loving kiss on your lips. something unlike she had ever done. every kiss you two had shared was sloppy, desperate and full of lust. but this time, it was sweet, slow and passionate. her hand cupped your cheek before she finally pulled away, resting her forehead on yours. 

“if our coaches could see us now,” she laughed, which made you do the same. you wrapped your arms around her neck as you always do, the warmth from her radiating like the sun. 

“bet they’d still try to bench us–” another spring of laughs came from the both of you before ellie finally pulled herself off of you. standing up she stretched her arm to help you up, which you took happily. “do you wanna stay over?” 

the question was like music to ellie’s ears, “i’d love to–” she planted a delicate kiss on your cheek. 

“good good,” you trailed, turning around to look at your dorm building which was easily more than a few yards away by now. being around ellie brought out the competitiveness in you yet again but this time it was more playful. “wanna race?” 

“seriously?” she turned her head, the smile on ellie’s face was now permanent in your presence. 

“what? you scared?” you mocked her lightly, tapping her shoulder and she scoffed at the accusation. 

“you know what? yeah, let’s race. i bet you–” 

you took off sprinting, even in your slippers you had managed to get a great head start. you could hear ellie’s footsteps behind you, slowly catching up. “hey, that’s cheating!” she shouted from behind you. while she watched you win the childish bet, she felt stupid for not allowing herself this type of happiness before, but if she had the chance to go back and change anything, she never would.

epilogue

[mayasaurusss]

I want headcanons on dating a werewolf!lottie 🫡🫡🫡 like she would be an amazing werewolf so fluffy big and silly pls

A/N: Very sorry @sokestry, as always I started the headcanons without reading the full request before... I really should stop and think before doing these, but any other attempt I did today was MEDIOCRE so I kept this. I can make another set of headcanons more centered on the relationship, if you want! These past weeks have been rough on me, so blame university for my bad writing!

Warnings: fluff, implied start of relationship.

"Anyways, I'm sure there's nothing in it. You were probably just high. And why where you even there in the first place?" you joke half heartedly with Van. "And I continue to say, there was something! I am sure of it! And, that's none of your business". Van sits back in her chair, blushing slightly "Were you trying to recreate some scenes from your stupid slasher movies or were you hooking up with Tai?" Lottie joins the 'let's bother Van' game.

There was a rumor in town: the woods were haunted. Or at least, that's wat everyone who returned from them said. Couples which wanted to spend some 'fun time' togheter, groups of friends wanting to feel the thirll of something begin with them in the woods, all said the same.

At night, when everyone's asleep, something roams the woods, searching for introuders.

"Uh, let's not talk about that. I tell you, I heard something in the woods" she continues, "Yeah, yeah, sure. Whatever you say Van". That last phrase must have made her mad, 'cause her fists slam heavly on the table and her voice becomes slightly more loud than usual. "If you are that sure of yourself then, come on! Go! I want to see if your shit eating grin will still be there when you go into the woods!".

Lottie sips on her drink, "I think she's right. Besides, it's not safe to go out at night alone. Who knows which creeps are around".

Lottie, your... 'friend' has always been at your side, ever since the start of college. Lately, her demeanor has changed: once she used to be more shy and reserved but her personality has taken a new turn around two months ago. Now, she couldn't stop begin around you and trying to protect you. Probably, Van's challenge was making her uncomfortable.

"What, are you a chicken?" Van ignores Lottie, "You will understand what I'm talking about once you go there".

The moon is high in the sky tonight, like a giant white marble piercing through the dark. The air feels cold, too freezing to be an early summer evening.

You try not to mind the countless of spines slashing at your irritated skin, which by now has started to leave a faint trail of blood down your leg.

Annoyance fills your brain and you mentally face palm yourself: you should have known that it was a bad idea agreeing to Van's.

No matter, you're here now.

The woods are eerily queit. The air feels suddenly thick and heavy. Every sound the forest made before has gone queit and there's onyl the sound of your own breath. And that of a branch snapping behind you.

The blood in your veins freezes and you halt your movments. How the fuck can a branch snap on it's own?

You quickly whip your head around to be met by a pair of golden eyes. You can't make out what this thing is, just that big.

It hunches over you, almost kneeling on the ground, trapped in between the pine branches.

Tired of it's position, it shrugs off and stands on it's back legs. Now you can make it more clearly: it's tall, really tall.

You tell your libms to move, to run, to spend every single amout of energy you have left to make a run for it. Anything to stay alive, anything at all. But you don't, you can't.

Your limbs feel like lead and your body is almost paralized, like a deer in headlights.

The creature ducks under a high branch and comes back up stumbling over it's legs. It's so tall that it can't move as freely has it wants. Nevertheless, it's agile enough to be in front of you in seconds.

For how much you can see, it's covered in fur and has a long mound.

It releases a puff of air on your face, like it's releasing some kind of tension from it's chest. It comes even closer, as if it's any more possible, and now you're eyeing it's chest. Close enough that you can see each individual fur and how the night breeze moves it.

Unconciusly you meet it's eyes, expecting to find something horrifying, something that will tear your face open; only to be meet with what looks to be a... dog.

A big, giant, fluffy dog. Well, it resembles more a brownish wolf. It has an eerie human look to it, like it can understand your fear completely.

It's has deep brown eyes -the yellow colour must've been the reflection of the fallen flashlight-, on it's forehead there's a small scar without any fluff covering it.

The big, giant, fluffy dog gets closer to you, it starts to smell around your face. It's attentive, trying to unederstand if you are a threath or not. If it knows you, or not.

You look in diesbelief when the big, giant, fluffy dog starts to wave it's tail behind it's back. In just a matter of seconds, it's on you: all that you can feel is it's fur on you, heavy breathing, the thump of it's tail and an occasional lick on your face.

With curiosity, you reach a hand behind it's left ear and scratch.

The creature falls to it's side and for a second you think it got hurt in some way, but it has adjusted so that you can pet it's belly.

When you do, it's starts to let out some light wines of approval. And you are even more confused.

You'd wish you could stay here longer, that you could spend more time with this thing -for how crazy that sounds- but you're getting cold -that's on you for not bringing a jacket- and most importantly, you fear that if you accidentally do the wrong move, the next thing that that thing will do is ripping your guts open.

You wait for the creature to be comfortable enough, then, ever so slowly you get up, careful to not upset it -or to not stomp on it's tail-.

Just some minutes later, it wakes up. Cold and alone.

The morning after your little adventure, you're begin pestered by Van, "So? Is Miss 'I'm not scared of anything' convinced now? Or did you chiken out?".

You can't let her know she was right, or you'd never hear the end of it.

"I'm not sure what you saw, but I didn't see nor heard anything" you say while trying not to show your nervousness. "Yeah sure. You have an habit of lying; I remember when we saw 'The Conjuring'. You acted all cool then the day aft-"

Lottie falls heavly on the chair next to yours and hides her face in her arms.

Both you and Van look at eachother before turning to Lottie, "Hey Lottie? Sweetie? Is everything ok?" she visibly shudders at the pet name, but tries to play it off. "Yes...Just a bit tired, that's all".

Lottie has a strange look to herself today. During summer she usually wears one of those skimpish outfits of hers, but today she's covered head to toe. It looks like she hasn't slept all night.

"Uhm... ok...if you say so", Lottie seems stranger than usual. She's looking at you with a certain sparkle in her eyes. And, as if you hurt her somehow.

Some weeks go by with Lottie behaving ever so strangely. When you've had enough, you decide to crash at her house without telling her both to see what's she's been up to and to make her annoyed.

It's eight pm when you climb and knock on Lottie's window, startling the poor girl. She's wearing a black tank top and a pair of shorts. She looks almost angry at the fact that you're here.

"Why are you here?" she huffs at you while falling back on her bed. "Oh come on Lottie. You've been acting weirder than usual, I just wanted to check ok you. That's what friends do".

A small whine leaves Lottie, "We... We are not friends". Freezing your movements, you look back at her. "What are we then, Lottie?"

She's about to answer you, when her words die in her throat. A shiver travels up her body as her body starts to morph.

When you try to get closer to her and help, she shows you back on her bed and tries to run away from you. But her legs are too weak.

You watch as your best friend becomes something else. The second she starts to change, something in your mind snaps and links everything together.

The transformation is so terrifying that you can't watch. When you look back, your best friend has morphed into the creature from the woods.

She looks almost ashamed of herself, trying to make herself become smaller and to evade your eyes. Her tail fits snugly into her legs while from her throat leave whines.

She almost jumps up when she feels your hand on her. You ran your fingers on her brownish fur while holding her.

You try to not show your terror, and hold her closer than possible.

"Don't worry... You're ok...". You stay with her until morning, when her body becomes hers again.

As soon as she returns back to normal, Lottie throws her arms on your shoulders and snugs into your neck. Tears stain your shirt and she sobs uncontrollably "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry I-I'm this ugly thing... I was... I was scared of hurting you. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I did".

You sit in silence, trying to comfort her at the best of your abilities.

"So... Why did you jump on me that night?" Lottie's breath halts and you can feel her cheeks heating up on your skin.

"Huh... You really like me then!" Lottie shudders in your arms "Stooop".

[artsyhamster]

And we've reached the end! I cannot believe we made it but here are the final four. :)

You know the drill by now, explanations and ramblings underneath the cut :D

(1) THE FOOL / THE MAGICIAN / THE HIGH PRIESTESS |

(2) THE EMPRESS / THE EMPEROR / THE HIEROPHANT |

(3) THE LOVERS / THE CHARIOT / STRENGTH |

(4) THE HERMIT / WHEEL OF FORTUNE / JUSTICE |

(5) THE HANGED MAND | DEATH | TEMPERANCE |

(6) THE DEVIL / THE TOWER / THE STAR |

(7) THE MOON / THE SUN / JUDGEMENT / THE WORLD

THE MOON - As I mentioned in the previous set, I had The Star and The Moon exchanged at first. Colorwise I found the Balcony Smoker to be more fitting but descriptionwise.... "[The fool's] bliss (...) makes him vulnerable to the illusions of the Moon" fit Klaasje more. I feel like Harry related to her on a level and of course was drawn to her beauty, and fell for her deception. Or well at least I did lol. Although I don't even want to call it deception, more like...obfuscation in self-defense. Klaasje on the rooftop staring at a moon seemed like a nice visual image too.

THE SUN - I had. So much trouble. Filling this role. Since The sun stands for everything warm and joyous. "It enlightens, so the Fool both feels and understands the goodness of the world." And it's pretty hard to find something joyous in Revachol. I almost chose Ruby just for the orange aesthetics and the sort of... enlightenment. But considering she might shoot herself in the head, I refused to put her in the role of the sun. I wanted to save the Insulidan phasmid for THE WORLD at first, but I am damn happy I let go of that thought. Especially since the story starts and begins with the fool anyway. SO YEAH. I love this stick bug.... I cannot describe it. After you go through this whole bleak game, filled with death, misery, failure and coldness you find this...walking wonder. And the soundtrack to this encapsulates it so well, too. The phasmid scene always fills me with so much happiness T_T

JUDGEMENT - Also one of the the cards that were pretty clear to me from the beginning. Trant looks pretty menacing here but I love it lol. I added a small Harry, because under the judging eyes of his colleagues, everyone would feel small. "The Fool has been reborn. His false, ego-self has been shed, allowing his radiant, true self to manifest." The radiance is debatable, but Harry definitely went through a lot of development in the past few days and hopefully he came out a better person. He isn't absolved of his past mistakes and further judged on those, rather he is judged on the things he did right. And I don't know, what I like about Harry in general is that he is an absolute fuckup but if you give a person the right support and faith in them to be better, they can. If you keep reminding people only of the things they've done wrong, you are taking their room to grow, by defining them as an irredeemable failure.

THE WORLD - "The Fool reenters the World, but this time with a more complete understanding. He has integrated all the disparate parts of himself and achieved wholeness. He has reached a new level of happiness and fulfillment." Well, what can I say. Our fool Harry started this journey full of ignorance but he opened his eyes to the mistakes of the past and learned from them, and is now hopefully ready to tackle life anew. And I love the last sentence of The Fool's story: This cycle is over, but, the Fool will never stop growing. Soon he will be ready to begin a new journey that will lead him to ever greater levels of understanding. While this chapter of his life is over, there'll be new stories to be told. Setbacks and more opportunities to grow, and only time will tell where his journey will lead him this time.

Thanks to everyone who followed me and Harry on this journey and read through my ramblings. Also thanks for all the lovely tags & comments, it was an absolute pleasure reading through these. <3 Much Love!

[obsessedtomone]

Unravel Yourself Before Me ⛓️ Chapter 1 - Convenience ▸Shigaraki x femReader

Summary: “Say, I’ll make you a killer deal,” he begins, the tone of his voice deceptively even, failing to mask the coldness. “If you fucking apologize to me right now, and manage to clear things up with the professor before—” He slides his sleeve just above his expensive-looking smartwatch and casually checks the time, “—the class ends, in about… mmh, give or take three minutes? I promise you won't regret this as much as you will if you do go through with this stupid shit you started with me.”

His face breaks into a slow and creepy smile as he threatens you, body emanating nothing other than incredible malice.

You wish you could turn back time and never cross his path, that stupid night at the store.

You wish you were a different, nicer person, one that knows when to bow their head or to apologize if they messed up.

But you weren’t and you won’t. Setting: University AU - No quirks (unless degenerate personalities count) Tags: Slow burn, Eventual Smut, Unhealthy/Toxic Relationships, Humiliation, Mentally Ill Reader, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to ??? Warning: Dead Dove – Do Not Eat | Mind the tags TW: Implied Su/Self H, Dubcon, Reader has a super shitty past like actually, Shigaraki Tomura is his own warning.

AO3 Crosspost | Chain Divider by firefly-graphics

Chapters: One • Two • Three

Chapter 1 - Convenience Pitter-patter.

With a pop of your joints, you reach for the moon or the ceiling or maybe the gods above. You reach and you reach and finally you feel that satisfying stretch burn through your muscles.

What time is it anyway?

Uh-oh.

You cringe, because the birds are chirping, the first light of the day is starting to show, and because… you’ve been gaming your entire fucking Saturday night.

It’s 4:30 AM when you check your phone.

—And you could’ve been studying, could’ve been in touch with your project buddies, to at least send them your part of the project in time. But you didn’t and you won’t.

Not at least until tomorrow anyway.

Tomorrow, probably around ten minutes before your group’s deadline.

Yeah, you’re that special kind of asshole.

Looking around yourself, you realize that—all of the sudden, the room feels so fucking stuffy you could suffocate. It’s messy and god fucking knows when you opened your goddamn windows last.

So that’s exactly what you decide to spend your next action point on, as your mind briefly wandered back to your past few Valorant matches. 

You actually stayed up late, trying your best to climb to Diamond and dealing with the hyper-misogyny of random pathetic incel teammates who immediately shit themselves the moment a woman opens her mouth on mic.

Whatever.

At least you weren’t living in your mommy’s basement, swimming in a sea of trash, right?

You glance around your room and wince.

Okay, maybe you’re swimming in like—a puddle of trash. 

But that’s okay, because you’re definitely way above those goblins on a societal level… right?

You don’t dwell very much on that particular thought.

With a yawn, you reach for the windows and open them wide. The cool air of soft autumn rain invades your stale room the second you open them, replacing the warm stuffiness of your man-cave and filling your lungs with fresh oxygen.

You wonder how long it’s been raining for already, when you feel your stomach—the one vital organ you’ve purposefully been ignoring all night—growling. What did you eat today?

When the fuck did you eat last, actually?

“Uuugh—” you whine, finally feeling the shakiness of your hands and the overall weakness of your body. 

On your way towards your joke of a kitchen, you decide what flavor cup noodles to scarf down quickly before you hit the hay. Your internal debate is torn between two particular flavors, before you open the cupboard and realize—there aren’t any instant noodles left.

God fucking damn it.

You briefly glance down over your sorry excuse of an outfit—one that would put homeless people to shame—made up of plain black sweats and an oversized black hoodie, noting how you should also maybe perhaps take a fucking shower after literally sweat-gaming all day.

Fuck it, you think, taking a total of two seconds to decide that this was good enough for the world, before you set off to the nearest twenty-four hour convenience store.

So you grab your phone, your keys, and that’s what you do.

────────

Despite the hints of a rising sun, it’s still pretty dark outside. The air smells like fresh morning rain and wet concrete.

You don’t mind, because to your own delight, it couldn’t be quieter around here.

The neighborhood you live in is incredibly sketchy, but you couldn’t complain given it’s barely a fifteen minute walk to your university and the rent to your rundown one-bedroom apartment is dirt fucking cheap.

It suits the broke ass bitch that you are and you like it this way—one, because you have a thing for sketchy run-down places and two… because it’s yours and yours alone.

The totally-legal-and-definitely-wont-blind-you pepper spray you bought from the shadiest internet store sits snugly in the pocket of your hoodie, one hand occasionally fidgeting and feeling the rim of the object. 

Knowing you have something to use in your defense makes you feel safer when you’re outside. You never know when something unpleasant could go down.

You’re so used to being on-guard after all the years of shitty experiences. 

Of being on your own.

Of stupid shit that kept happening to you.

So you walk, if only with a smear of anxiety, because you still need to stay vigilant and not put the universe to a fucking test.

The first thing you notice when you waltz into the corner store, is how goddamn bright the fluorescent lights are. They’re far too bright for your tired eyes that are used to endless hours of staring into dimmed screens with the lights off.

The second thing you notice is how eerily quiet it is inside—save for the whirring, clicking and occasional gurgling of the refrigerators in the back. Or at least that’s where you think the sounds come from.

It’s odd that the current shift didn’t think of turning on the radio to fill the silence—to make this place feel less like a ‘bad end’ location from a horror game—but a quick glance towards the staff at the counter and their wireless earpieces tells you that they couldn’t give less of a fuck about the store’s ambiance.

Not that it matters, when you’re too busy surveying the shelves in search of some food, of something edible, the ‘food’ in question consisting mostly of snacks and other nutritionless garbage that would give nine point five out of ten doctors a cardiac arrest.

Speaking of heart failure, you find yourself in front of the refrigerated drink aisle, using all of your brain wrinkles to make your hardest decision yet.

Which one of the canned heart attack flavors are you gonna buy today?

You hum, spending a good three minutes (give or take) thinking, and when you finally go ahead, reaching with your fingertips to grab the energy drink—

“Hey,” a low and grating voice speaks right behind you.

The sound makes you fucking jump.

You turn around with a scowl and then—straight out of a comedy skit, you feel like you’re staring at your male doppelgänger.

An extremely sketch-looking guy, wearing black sweats that match your own, the hood of his equally dark colored hoodie up and covering a messy mop of white hair.

And then you notice his… his intense crimson colored eyes, drilling a hole through the middle of your fucking skull.

If only looks could kill.

“Did you need something?” You fail to mask the venom in your voice, aimed at him for no good reason.

A skin care routine, you think.

Not like you bothered with one either, but at least your face isn’t disintegrating into disgusting flakes yet, unlike his punk ass.

Motherfucker couldn’t have waited two fucking minutes for you to pick something? 

Where the fuck do you have to be at like 4:50 in the morning?!— you scoff, but the words remain yet unspoken.

The hooded figure raises his hand to scratch at his pale neck, seemingly annoyed at your shitty attitude towards him. 

He just has to meet the worst type of bitch at this ungodly hour, on a Saturday no less—and he isn’t having it. 

Red eyes stare you down for a moment, watching your face scrunch up at his sight.

“You’ve been standing in front of the drinks for like ten fucking minutes, ugly ass bitch.” He finally claps back, and with that, your eyes narrow. “Pick something or get the hell outta my way.”

“I was just about to, asshole,” you reply, voice betraying you and ultimately cracking while you seethe. “Grab your stupid ass drink so you can finally go home to the boys and cry about not getting any.” 

You finish your sentence and stand aside for him, motioning to the drinks all the while his eyes widen in what you presumed to be shock—but before he has the chance to respond, you hurry the fuck up and leave.

The poor employee at the counter who saw the scene playing out (store ain’t that big, now), seems to want nothing to do with any of this. Graveyard shifts must be really fucking fun when you’re graced with not one, but two annoying idiots.

You drop all of your items on the counter and while the cashier is scanning them, you pat all four of your pockets, looking for your wallet to pay.

Until it dawns on you.

No fucking way—

Ain’t no fucking way your stupid, braindead ass forgot to bring money.

This isn’t fucking happening to you right now.

Especially since the embodiment of patience is standing just a few inches behind you, shifting uncomfortably from one leg to the other and waiting with bated breath for you to finally pay and get lost.

“Uhh. Do—Do you guys keep tabs open?” you ask, recoiling at the sound of your own voice, scratching at the back of your head sheepishly and almost whispering the second half so the guy behind you wouldn’t be able to hear it. “I kind of… forgot my wallet at home.”

The cringe that is already coursing through your veins, deepens infinitely when you see the employee stare at your face, as if you grew a second head.

“No.”

Your humiliating predicament makes the guy behind you break into the creepiest snicker. You shoot him a glare and dare him to say something, but he’s too busy laughing at you.

God, if only the ground would swallow you whole, right fucking now.

With the worst shades of shame coloring your face, you turn around to leave, swearing to never set foot in this fucking establishment ever again. Nevermind that it’s the only store close to your house.

Before you have the chance to make good on your promise, the white haired guy reaches out—if a bit hesitant—and grabs your arm.

What’s the chance a nuke would crash into this fucking store and wipe out your entire existence, together with whoever is here to fucking witness this? Or maybe aliens could finally make contact with planet Earth and take you the fuck away. Getting your ass probed sounds infinitely more appealing than this incredible embarrassment you feel in front of the two assholes.

“Hold.”

Your pathetic gaze lifts from the ground and when you meet his eyes he looks—amused?

“What. Let go of me, man.” You panic, trying to free yourself from his grip, but his fingers are firm. Is that blood under his fingernails?

“I’ll pay,” he offers, a disturbing smirk playing on his dry lips.

This fucking guy.

“N-No, I’m good. Thanks.” Your voice is shaking more than you want it to and you feel tears finally prick at your eyes.

Why do you live your life this way? Why are you so fucking pathetic—especially in front of assholes like him?

Why are you still so weak? 

After everything you’ve been through?

You try once more to shake him off of you, but he’s deceptively strong for his build, and doesn’t relent now that he’s got you where he wants you to be.

“It’s okay, really. This just made my night so I’m gonna pay for ya,” he says, the almost-even tone in his voice not matching the way his creepy smile seems to be getting wider.

He swiftly pulls out some scrunched-up bills from the pocket of his sweats, slipping them to the employee who could not give less of a fuck about whoever pays first, grabbing your already-bagged purchase and basically shoving it to you as he gives his best ‘Come again soon!’ bullshit line that actually translates to ‘Please fucking leave the store already’.

“How about that, huh? Now you owe me one, little bitch,” he whispers into your ear, voice low and full of grit sending chills down your spine and rendering you absolutely speechless.

Without sparing you so much as a second glance, he finally pays for his own shit and leaves the store in a smug stride.

You could basically read the “EZ” he wrote in slash all chat while destroying your fucking nexus.

What a horrible fucking night, you think to yourself, hurrying to go home as well.

Your only comforting thought being that you wouldn’t have to see his stupid fucking pasty face ever again.

[freyaloi]

You know... I can't help but feel that Orb is talking about Junior and his father here. (also possibly referring to the royal family from their own era but anyway) Time to get my brain worms out.

When Junior's animations changed a few months ago, I've been pondering the meaning of it ever since.

I may be fairly new to the game and not particularly active but it's the story, and more specifically Junior that caught my eye and made me want to play, even if sporadically.

When I first saw him, he was a lot more confident, standing tall and proud, flourishing his cutlass as if he didn't have a care in the world.

These days, however, his animations seem a lot more guarded, he's hunched, hiding his face, turning away... He's even putting his cutlass between himself and us. Now to me, that tells me there's something wrong with him or something is going on, and I've always wondered if everything he's done in the name of his father is starting to catch up to him.

In the book where he describes himself, he gives no hint of having any evil nature. Ambitious, overconfident and a bit of an idiot? Absolutely, but not evil... But back then he didn't have any street smarts either, so to speak. Now I know being a skeleton changes things and messes with the mind, but it wasn't until he met Wanda that he fixated on Serving his Father, obsessively so, desperate to prove himself like so many others. That adoration and idealisation he had of Flameheart as a child still persists even though his mental image was reshaped by her.

Flameheart was never a good man, he was a bully and a tyrant and still is, but even though he was an absent father, he still gave Junior the best childhood he could, perhaps reliving his own ideal childhood fantasies through his newly adopted son. (that could be another reason why he adopted the child in the first place because it seems so out of character but anyway) That left Junior with a deep level of affection for him, which of course we know about... (but perhaps some melancholy too)

But the Flameheart we have now isn't the one he knew growing up. He in fact never was, only telling him an idealised version of events and keeping secrets. Junior himself says his father told him he didn't need to know what he saved the boy from. (Flameheart attacked and sank the ship Junior was on as a baby so there's that)

That brings me to my theory...

I can't help but wonder if actually working 'with' his Father has begun to create cracks in that blazing ideal image of his, that those rose-tinted glasses are beginning to slip, no matter which shape they take. He had one idea of his father in his mind as a child, that of a hero, which set him on his journey in the first place. No doubt the Cap'n gave him one too, telling him of the betrayal and the horrors he committed... Then so did Wanda, praising him, lording him, and elevating him to the kingly status Flameheart craves now. (though part of that was obviously her own ambition speaking)

But with them all out of the picture, Junior gets to see his father for who he truly is now, for the bloodthirsty, blazing pit of vicious sadistic hatred that he actually is.

For a while, I could see him obsessively working to serve his father as he said he would, in fact, we've seen this with him creating and being the face of the Reapers we know today, resurrecting his father and being his right-hand man. I'm sure for a while he would have been over the moon to be working alongside his father, the man he adored growing up, his idol, his role model... Well, you know what they say about meeting your idols...

Here we are now, with Flameheart back near his full power and seeking more and yet... You would think Junior would be elated, even with his reserved and tempered mannerisms. Yet to my eyes... He looks the complete opposite, small, retreating... in pain even....

Let's not forget he's a Skeleton Lord, even though he's nowhere near the power level of Flameheart, he's not just a regular old skeleton... So like Duke, like Wanda... He still retains the majority of his mind. And to my knowledge... He is not bound to Flameheart by magic... only by word. Junior is an intelligent man, one who has gained the use of dark magic, and knows a great deal of disciplines from the outside world. He's a studious, patient and learned man who was trained to be very observant.

So is he having second thoughts? Is that why they changed his animations? Is he beginning to see the truth of his actions and having regrets? Has he realised that the man he's working for, isn't the matching up to the ideal image in his head? (whatever that looks like now)

It could also be he's being prepared to be sacrificed in some ritual, I could see Flameheart doing something like that to maintain his status and power... after all, his biggest fear is being beaten... and currently the biggest potential threat to him... is his right-hand man... as always. After all, it wouldn't be out of fashion for a King's closest advisor and Servant to inevitably betray them.

It would be poetic and fitting for Flameheart (should he need to be defeated at some point for plot resolution) to be beaten by his hubris again, at the hand of his second-in-command. After all, Junior had always dreamed of surpassing his father's legend... And betrayal is a founding principle of the Reaper's Bones... A founding act that Flameheart himself initiated three decades ago.

And we all know, Junior is not safe... but then, now that Flameheart is back, with a thirst for vengeance and army at his fingertips... nobody is.

Anyway, this is my long-ass theoretical ramble that I desperately needed to get out of my brain (god there is so much more i could add but this is plenty long enough so props to you if you read this marathon of prattling). I could be completely off the mark, but fair enough, but this is what I do, latch onto a character, learn the lore and theorise. :)

Anyway, let's see where the story goes, as always me and Raven will be watching from the sidelines with popcorn in hand.

[ginevralinton]

Have a very quick Chess-Husbands-Julian-POV-Ramble-Thing that I don't have the energy to think of a title for or to edit

(sorry for any mistakes in this)

No Getting Feelings had been part of the contract, right from the beginning. He’d set it out, clear and simple: No Feelings, No Commitment, and No Special Treatment.

He hadn’t been worried about himself, obviously. Let’s be honest, this was Julian Fawcett, former MP (disgraced), whose cold, decrepit heart had (literally) given up on him, getting it off with an actual caveman, who sometimes chased squirrels like a dog.

No Getting Feelings – perfectly easy for him, perhaps a bit harder for Robin who got attached to the moon and mice and various people who’d long been sucked off (perhaps in more than one way, Julian hadn’t got round to asking yet), but all in all, not too difficult because the caveman was, well, a caveman, who’d seen everything, lost most things, and dismissed Christmas, weddings, government, and  canapes as silly fads. (There really was no convincing him on the merits of bite-sized, caviar crostini or a devilled egg – would leave me starving ��� yes, that’s the point, all the more room for the wine-dinner – would rather eat bum – I’m sure you would).

Really, the whole thing had just been a formality, a little precaution – look, Julian had been caught out before. And yeah, he was dead, but that didn’t mean other dead people couldn’t make you after-life into hell – or, you know, a precursor to hell, if this was purgatory. He’d just said it, because that’s what you – he – did when anything like this started anyway. No Feelings, No Special Treatment, No Commitment – the big three – and sure, there were a few others (No Sleeping in My Bed – broken after two weeks; No Suggestive Looks in Company – dismissed after a month or so, because honestly, some people were dense) – but it was important to get those three in straight off.

And look, Julian had intended to keep to the contact – but, well, you know, it was like the Great British public always said, like what the BBC, and every journalist were always reminding everyone: never trust a word a politician says.

In his defence, he really hadn’t thought it would require any effort to stick to the rules. He really hadn’t considered that games of chess, finding the same things funny, doing some actual stargazing, and dipping into a few too many deep-tragic-conversations might actually dredge something up in him besides his basic need to get off.

Still, stranger things have happened – men on the moon, The Green Party getting seats, that time in Amsterdam with the contortionist – becoming a ghost. All of that to say, yes, it did come as a bit of a shock when half-way through some god-awful Music Club, Julian had found himself not wincing at Pat rendition of Fernando, but looking over at Robin, who was absolutely into the performance, like he was with most music, come to think of it, because let it be said, the caveman’s taste was anything that made a kind-of-vaguely-musical-sound, and yes, Julian was trying to refine this a bit, but back to the point. He was looking over at Robin, all in his element, and then, he was having this warm, gooey feeling, the kind of feeling that could only be compared to a menu trying to tempt you into getting the caramel brownie sundae over the cheese board or the expresso with a shot of whatever liquor was on offer – except, well, this time, Julian was swayed.

Alright, so it wasn’t that simple and he’d be doing some creative photoshopping of the truth if he was to suggest it was all mushy-lovey-dovey from that moment on. Yes, he had a good few oh-god-oh-god-oh-god moments, two months of trying to avoid Robin (easier than you’d think, living in the same house and all), a false declaration of being sick-to-death-or-whatever-the-already-dead-equivalent-was of chess, and then a simple demand of what is your big problem now?, a whole bunch of rambling and walking in literal and verbal circles, and an actual crackling of lightening, a clap of thunder, a moment of forgetting they were dead and seeking shelter in the old gatehouse – four-walls, a bed, dry at least, even though it didn’t matter anymore – a brief conversation and then it was all settled in their own way – and no, Julian would not be making any further comment at this time – because no, it wasn’t that kind of story, or that one – and look, if you were to fall into the after-life with a bottle of something decent – or even not, at this point – then he’d probably tell you.

All that to say this: this thing – him and the caveman – had not been part of the plan – had not been part of the deal at all, but he should have known better really, because say what you like about Julian Fawcett, former-MP (disgraced), but know, if you ever need someone without any scruples to break a contract, he’s your man.

[button-kin-games]

The Doomed Love Story of Mika and Jamie

One of my favourite things about my new game, Jude's World, is exploring the (doomed?) love story of Jude's parents, Mika and Jamie.

The first part of this solo TTRPG is building the life that these two had together leading up to the moment of their break up, when the story begins. It's an exercise where you get to explore what brings two people together and sew the seeds you think might tear them apart.

This play through, Jude has two mothers who originally bonded over their mutual obsession with horses. They met because one worked at the stable where the other came every day to care for their horse, Moon. They sacrificed their savings and their hobbies to have Jude by IVF, and while they never regret that choice they have found that 12 years later the passion has gone somewhat out of their relationship. Can it be rekindled? I'll play to find out.

The previous time I had a free-spirit hot sauce entrepeneur dad with a type-A lifestyle influencer mum. They struggled to reconcile their different approaches to life heading into middle age. In the end through Jude's efforts they became good friends and supportive co-parents.

Before that I had a film maker and a rocket scientist - very Disney made-for-TV movie. On their first date they kissed in the cockpit of a space ship. Their central conflict was their different backgrounds. Their families did NOT get along. In the end they worked through it and came back together.

Anyway, I'm just really proud of the mechanics that allowed me to quickly create these people and get attached to them and their woes. I hope everyone who plays this game has the same feeling!

The campaign launches in just two weeks, on 6th August. Follow here if you want to know when it goes live.

[theemeraldforesthideout]

Once I cross into 2025, it will feel like my life prior to May this year will properly be in the past. And so I wanted to post about what it was like back then. I don't want it to be negative, though, even though I feel like I've lost a lot this year. I'm thankful for all those woodland nights, all those dates with the moon, the moon gatherings I attended, the people I met and became friends with at the European residential centre which came to an end due to brexit was nestled in the woods around there, and all the deep conversations I had with random people visiting nearby sacred sites. For example, one summer's evening, by chance, I met a girl, who was a performing arts therapist, and her boyfriend. They had me playing a game with them, which I assumed was a kind of, sample, of what she teaches. It ended in us all acting out an animal of our choosing. Cue me stood in the woods with two strangers that felt like long-term friends, making the most bizarre animal noises. I can't actually believe some of the things that I ended up involved with in those woods. One night I was at the ancient hillfort and I ended up watching an impromtu celtic drum ritual. Then there was the anarchist eco-punks (that's what it said on their plant rack) that set up a village below said hill fort - they were really nice people, too. So welcoming - not like nearly all of my experiences with people in "real life" (by which I mean, you know, my not-woods-life) prior to that, where constant competition and egos the size-of-planets reigned supreme. It's not overselling it to say I had a bit of parallel life out there - escaping the void into a micro-universe of alternative beings and alternative feelings. The Celts had flocked to the area in the ancient past, and after that, the Romans built shrines in the area. In modern times, the residential centre pulled in people from across the continent, as well a people of alternative lifestyles from far and wide. I realise I was incredibly fortunate to have ended up in a place where all of this was going on, especially in the context of my wider story and upbringing. I guess the universe did let me exist on occasion.

But no longer. And not just because I moved away. Many things from that pocket universe slowly started to end, way before I left. I would say 2023 was the beginning of the end. The temp village was gone by October last year, the centre was now fully private and all the lovely people from across Europe were no longer in residence. The sacred sites had blown up big time on social media thanks to influencers that were, at that point, scouring every inch of the land for their next big reel hit, and so people started visiting en masse. But those people weren't like those from before - they weren't quirky and open-minded and loving. They were less tumblr and more instagram, and instead brought a very different set of values with them. The "outside" world had caught up with me again. And so the micro-universe that had acted as a crucial crutch for me, piece by piece, fell apart. In a way... we ended simultaneously.

The last time I met someone closer in mind, to those from before, was in March this year. A rare outlier of what was. I was coming back from the deeper woods, crossed through a small valley to where people collect water from a spring. There were four people there - two couples, and one of the girls set eyes on me and just out right said "oh hello fairy!" and she was like "...you're a fairy right?" and I was like "oh yes, very much so :D" and then I had a little conversation with them all. It made me happy that such a scenario could happen like that, but at the same time... I knew in a few months time, I wouldn't have moments like that again. It's a nice final memory. Anyway, this post is frigging humongous.

[valleynix]

How I Would Have Written Resident Evil: Village

let me preface this by saying a few things: i am slightly tipsy as i write this, so i apologize for any misspellings, incorrect lore, or things not articulated well. i also do not hate Ethan nor the original story of RE8, but i do think there was a lot of wasted potential and unnecessary plot holes

moving on, under the cut

i'll start off by saying that i loved Biohazard. it's genuinely one of my favorite games and the atmosphere is done so well. i love the horror, the mix of action, and the genuine fear you can feel as you run around, searching for answers.

Village did not have this, and it was a massive disappointment, as was the game itself, overall. i do still love it and it'll always be one of my favorites, but Capcom fumbled hard with the plot and the general story.

let's start off with this: in my own little fantasy land where Capcom doesn't hate women (joke), Mia would have been the protagonist in Village. think about how well the story could have gone between her knowledge from the Connections, her unknown relationship with Miranda, the fact she likely would have been struggling to actually fight (just like Ethan should've), and how much different her interactions would be.

i'm genuinely so tired of seeing husbands and/or fathers searching for their lost wife and/or child in horror games. appeal to a different audience!!! where's my mother searching for her lost child, taken by Eldritch horrors???

anyway, i won't be super detailed, but we'll say Mia is the protagonist and Ethan is sidelined :3

throughout the game, i personally would have made it much more obvious that the lords are indeed a family. like, i thought it was obvious enough, but apparently lots of people in this fandom didn't get the memo?? so i would make it more apparent.

and just like i mentioned in the one video i'd already made on this (kinda), i would have changed the lords' appearances and their deaths, pretty much meaning that only Donna (maybe) would have been killed. everyone else would have just been something for her to escape from.

(i'm sorry this isn't super detailed. i don't want it to turn into an eight hour essay, which i may do for a video later on, but anyway)

i will say that i probably would have changed the beginning sequence and made it more mother-daughter focused before Rose is taken. like, imagine Rose being kidnapped right from under Mia's nose without all the brutality and shooting, as comedic as that was, once you knew. the whole thing with Chris not telling Ethan what was going on was probably the dumbest thing in these games and i will forever stand by that.

so, we'll just say that Miranda somehow finds a way to subdue Mia long enough to kidnap baby Rose, and Mia wakes up cold and alone and has to follow a barely-there trail of footprints and feathers that eventually lead her to the village and the horrors within

i also probably would have kept the game during nighttime or early morning, simply because of how terrifying that would be. it's not as fun when you can blatantly see the mutants trying to stalk you (ahem. lycans.)

at this point, Rose is taken and we now have an angry mother on our hands that is very wary of what's going on around her, but now knows that Miranda is a culprit (because in my mind, Miranda has no real reason to hide from Mia, and came to her in her true form). this would leave the audience to question what she really knows and what she's been hiding, and while it would create skepticism, it would also generate curiosity.

Mia traverses the village in relative darkness, led only by the moon's light (hehe symbolism) and the occasional torch. she searches the village for any inhabitants, and while she mostly finds blood and corpses, she also finds a group of people still surviving and untrusting of her.

i think the scariest thing would be that every time Mia progresses and comes back to the village, more people are missing and she finds out rather quickly that it's Miranda's doing. this would leave a sense of fear within her: Miranda is watching and waiting, she is causing Mia distress and threatening her without outright doing anything, letting her know she is unsafe and alone without ever laying a hand on her.

we'll say she goes to Donna's first, under the impression that the hermit dollmaker could have taken Rose per Miranda or she's just being mislead by Miranda posing as a villager (or even the witch lady). from there, she's forced through hallucinations, vivid fabrications of Rose and Ethan, all while struggling to see what is real and what's made up.

she finds out that Rose isn't at the Beneviento Estate, but now, Donna isn't letting her leave. she's not allowed to let her visitors through those doors, saying something similar (though perhaps slightly more afraid) to, "Don't leave... I can't let you." this may hint at the fact that Donna herself does not want to hurt Mia, but cannot let her leave.

Donna's boss fight consists of hallucinations and fabrications, and Mia "dies" when she succumbs to one and doesn't realize what it actually is. there is no "monster" in this section, but it's probably one of the scariest parts, as it takes place throughout the blackened estate and the dolls are, in fact, still moving and making little noises.

Mia escapes somehow, and when she returns to the village, she overhears a conversation from Miranda and someone else (perhaps Rednic?) basically hinting at the megamycete and the ritual and what needs to be done. this begins the plot of finding out what the fuck is going on and where the hell is her daughter, which she believes will be found together.

(sad mother moments, of course. i'd make them tearjerking.)

Mia then finds herself stumbling to Moreau's reservoir, cold and angry, and from here, she starts to realize just how deep Miranda's corruption really goes and how much danger she's actually in. in her mind, prior to this, she thought Miranda was under some kind of control or that she was simply a lackey in a larger scheme of things.

after all, the Miranda she knew was much different than this one, much less angry and violent. Mia doesn't recognize this woman any longer, and she begins to find herself very afraid of what she's gotten herself into, though she doesn't regret it.

Mia hears Moreau's pleas for his mother to help him, to be proud of him, to notice him, and all Mia can feel is the heartbreak of a mother watching this child throw a tantrum for his mom's attention. she tries to kill him, but in the end, she finds herself out of ammo and cornered and freezing her ass off, as well as injured from wounds so graciously gifted to her by lycans and the varcolac.

she escapes, leaves Moreau to his cries and his desperation, and at this point, Mia wonders just how much farther she can go until she collapses. she remembers those little moments with Rose when everything was starting to look up and when she thought her life was going to be normal again, and for a time, she fades into unconsciousness.

when she wakes, it's eerily quiet, and she knows she needs to leave. after more of the villagers go missing and they mention laughing and screaming from the castle, Mia decides she will go there next in her attempt to find Rose and take her away from this fucked up place, get her out of Miranda's grasp before she can do god knows what with her.

the castle is... eerie, yes, but not quite as dangerous as she had been expecting. she meets the Dimitrescus and she's most likely flirted with a bit (as they tend to do), and because Mia is a woman, her pleas are heard and she is allowed to speak, if only for a moment. they come to find that Mia is only there for her daughter and she will gladly leave once she's found, but they're under orders from Miranda now to keep Mia alive (wink wonk).

that doesn't stop them from chaining her up and giggling as they leave, as they did before. i'd make the castle much darker and make more noises throughout the halls, like footsteps or quiet laughter, maybe some soft clanging or things slightly being moved, like vases or chairs, only for there to be nothing.

it's creepy, but there's nothing outright dangerous until Mia finds herself cornered in the kitchens with a very angry Bela now out for blood. she holds back only a little during this little spat, but eventually, it gets to the point that Mia shoots open the window and only distracts Bela before she runs and manages to get away.

(it's now a safe room for her, as Bela would have run away when her weakness was exposed and warmed up, bruised ego be damned. she'll just regroup with her sisters and go from there).

i think the phone call scene would still happen, but it would be a little different. at the very least, it would still show that Miranda does not care about the lords as much as she claimed to and cares more about the ritual and ceremony, but now Lady Dimitrescu is pissed and wants Mia out of her castle before she can actually kill one of her daughters.

(i like to think Bela and/or Cassandra would be in the room, quietly observing, and if the player looks away long enough, looking back would show one or both of them staring right at Mia before quickly looking away. you know the drill).

Mia somehow finds a way to sympathize with Lady Dimitrescu, perhaps because she refuses to kill Daniela while the former is nearby or something, and she ends up escaping (though it's obvious the action is allowed, as Lady Dimitrescu is blatantly keeping her distance but ensuring Mia is chased out. yada yada).

more creepy village stuff happens, more fights with lycans, blah blah. i'm not entirely sure what to do here, but i'll think more on it.

the factory would be last, and i think it would be incredibly interesting with Heisenberg likely knowing that Mia and Miranda had a past together. he might try to use that against her and try to convince her that Rose is their only hope for being free (maybe playing into what she'd seen with his siblings), but he's ultimately denied again.

Mia doesn't know this dude, doesn't know his true intentions or if teaming up with him will guarantee her death at the price of his freedom. everything she'd gone through would have been for nothing, and so, she refuses.

i think the factory would have been creepier if the mechanical noises weren't so loud and in-your-face, but that's just me. keeping the lights low and the enemies quieter but still lit up would have been great, but oh well.

after making it through the factory and proving how strong she really is (never doubt a mother), she is, once again, faced with the opportunity to join Heisenberg or join the dead. she denies him once more, manages to escape the factory (and Sturm) as metal flies by and she's probably pierced a few times, and when she eventually becomes free, she just collapses in the middle of a dusk-lit village.

she's been through so much, lost everything dear to her, and she still hasn't found answers or her daughter. she begins to wonder if she ever left that first hallucination at Lady Beneviento's but she's too tired to care-

and then the moldy tendrils begin breaking from the ground, near enough to terrify her but far enough to know that she's not in immediate danger. she hears laughter and searches through the mold (which she comments on), vision blurry, only to completely freeze when she finds Miranda standing near one of the tendrils, watching her with a fond smile on her face.

this is all i've thought about (because the ANGST of seeing your, at the very least, old coworker/friend who is now a CULT LEADER and trying to kill you...) but i'll probably expand way more on it if i ever do a video on it. i didn't want this to turn into a massive ramble (even if it already did), so i'll pause here for now.

i didn't hit everything i wanted to and i'm sure i'm missing a LOT of points, but these were all the major things i would have changed or implemented. i am very tired and tipsy, and i do apologize for anything that doesn't sound quite right or that's left with like... no other point or explanation. i'll do better next time <33

[atwas-gaming]

Thoughts on the Final Horizon

I've been trying to put my thoughts on Final Horizon into a cohesive analysis, and... it hasn't happened yet. So just have some terribly disjointed thoughts.

Gameplay

First off, I want to say that I only filled in about a third of the map, so I probably didn't get the full story on anything. But I did beat The End, so I have seen how the story actually ends. And personally, I'm calling this the true ending. For one thing, the boss feels like a proper boss- it's very difficult to figure out on your own, it's easy to mess up, it's not just an out-of-place mini-game that felt like it was shoved in at the last second, and we're not left scratching our heads and wondering why literal Death wasn't so much harder.

Easy and medium modes in the base game left me with the same reaction as Sonic: "Is that it???" Hard mode left me feeling like nothing made sense. Seriously, a destroyer of worlds can't do better than a few dark and light particles and an occasional death laser? I spend most of hard mode in the base game going, "Ugh, I suck at bullet hells, what does this have to do with Sonic, anyway?!?"

The required mini-games were annoying enough, but to make it into a boss fight? Never made sense, and it never felt like a real Sonic boss.

But The End in Final Horizon does. First we fight Supreme. Same old Supreme fight as ever. And he whips out his gun and you're going, "gee, I wish they'd done more with that." But then you get into the final boss, and they did. The gun is how The End is filling Supreme with its power, connecting its siphon to it to fill Supreme with its power. We have to remove the siphon, and then the gun, to be able to destroy Supreme, and that gives us the opportunity to go after the moon.

I am not convinced that the hands that sprout from Supreme's back weren't inspired by TOTK's gloom spawn XP. Especially in the second phase of the fight, when they start glowing and spitting at us.

The perfect parry we learned to use in Master King Koco's trial (along with the punch-stomp technique, amirite?) suddenly becomes important instead of just a nuisance.

If you're like me and you were a little disappointed that Sonic automatically cylooped Knight's sword instead of us getting the chance to cyloop it, we now get the chance to cyloop Supreme's gun.

I have a few nitpicks on the design, largely the fact that those dang trees were in the way most of the time, and also that it was so hard to figure out how to manage the fight (I totally forgot that dodge changes the target, so I spent an hour or two trying to figure out why I couldn't just kill Supreme and then go after the moon). Otherwise, I think it was fairly well-designed, considering that it was a DLC addition.

Story

As for the story aspect, I loved it. It was honestly about time Sonic got a new form, and Cyber Sonic fits him so well. It's clearly more than he can handle, but he "goes all out," because if he doesn't, it's over. He's not just saving his friends, anymore- he has to destroy literal Death, or the universe itself will be destroyed. (Just the universe? From the way this thing is capable of destroying the walls between dimensions, I think Sonic just saved the whole freaking space-time continuum.)

And it becomes a team effort. First Sage steps up to throw up a shield similar to the dimensional shield that kept The End trapped for milleni- albeit a much smaller one that begins breaking almost immediately; however, the fact that she could do it at all speaks volumes about not only her strength, but her ability to tap into Cyberspace. Then Team Sonic joins in, each of them equal in strength to Sage because of not only their connections to Cyberspace, but also the cyber corruption they've suffered as a result of retrieving the Emeralds.

Sonic develops new attacks and abilities, apparently having gained even greater speed and agility than ever before because of the Cyber Corruption. I don't know if this happens all the time or if I just screwed up somewhere, but it seemed like The End shot out some kind of huge energy ball that ripped both the Emeralds and the rings right out of Sonic- but then he just pulled them all back in, somehow?

I was sitting there through the whole fight going, "Come on, come on, we gotta take out that moon!" And the way they did it was, I think, even better than the normal ending (base game). In the normal ending, Sage throws Sonic into The End, and while it's enough to do some damage, Sonic is just too small. Sage, in Supreme, is large enough and has enough power to completely obliterate The End- something Sonic couldn't have done even if he'd released all the Emeralds' power while he was passing through the moon's center. He would have died for nothing. But Sage dies, instead. And we get a post-credits cutscene of Eggman rebooting Sage from backup copies. This is the normal ending.

That's why I think of Final Horizon as the True Ending- it's the one where no one dies except the bad guy. And its so perfect. Eggman and Sonic just... they just work together like they each know what the other one's going to do (one of the benefits of having been enemies for so long, I guess). There's almost no conversation between them, Eggman's already got the gun attached to the Eggmobile, he doesn't have to tell Sonic that Sonic is going to be the bullet, he just knows to do it.

Once Sonic is safely enclosed deep within the barrel of the gun, he releases the barriers that he himself put up to protect himself from the corruption, becoming a little ball of pure cyber energy. The last time the corruption took him over, he turned into a statue, like stone. This time, he holds onto his mind long enough to remain conscious while he does what he has to do. Nothing is said about his mental condition, he just roars like an animal as he rushes at the shell of Supreme's casing and the moon. I imagine he let his amnesia take over, let his mind be taken over by pure rage and one thought: DESTROY THAT THING.

(Also, I recommend watching Sonic strike the final blow in Japanese. Junichi's screams are just so perfect. Roger's voice acting in Frontiers is amazing, but I'm sorry, Roger is still the worst screamer. Junichi is amazing here.)

And then... maybe I'm wrong, but I don't think I've ever seen Super Sonic look beat up, or unconscious. Perhaps it was the Emeralds that gave Sonic the ability to hold onto himself long enough to fight? At any rate, he unleashed his Cyber power while inside The End, destroying it, and neutralizing the corruption so it didn't affect him anymore.

And then Sage finally gets to hear Eggman call her his daughter. And... the final boss music from the base game finally makes sense. I never understood why it was so tender and lovely, or why it was called "I'm With You." I figured it had something to do with Sage, but I couldn't figure out what. Now that we have lyrics, it makes sense. All she was ever thinking about was her father. Even in the base game, before she realized that she would have to die, she was just looking forward to the day that she would have a family.

BTW, I'm still not a fan of the whole "daddy Eggman" thing, I see his fondness for Sage as purely narcissistic- he built her, and she protects him, and he's proud of her for exceeding his expectations. I don't think he cares about her, he just cares about what she does for him. But even so... it's still touching. And Sonic does have a monologue on Ouranos where he says something like, "Eggman, maybe you'll finally get your act together this time." Perhaps they are leaning in that direction. Hmm... tbh, I wouldn't mind seeing him get a redemption arc, eventually. Doubt it will ever really happen, but I'm a sucker for a redemption story, so I can hope.

Final Thoughts (and some hopes for Frontiers 2)

Anyway, despite some of the shortcomings and a lack of properly setting us up and preparing us for it, I think Final Horizon was good. I can't say that it leaves me feeling like they gave us the ending they had originally intended. For instance, I've heard that Ouranos was originally intended to be set in space or something (just a rumor I heard in one video- apparently there's a lost voice clip of Sage saying something about a mothership). So, I don't feel like we got the full story as it was originally intended.

But, like... this was the biggest and most well-received Sonic game to come out in generations (see what I did there?). And I believe Sega has already said they plan on using a similar format for the next game.

Now, I'm not trying to make a prediction or get anyone's hopes up, but... well...

I mean, Team Sonic's gonna go do their own things, right? Amy and Tails are going off to explore on their own, Knuckles says he wants to go somewhere and not be tied down to Angel Island so much anymore. So, who's gonna go with Sonic on his next adventure?

May I suggest making Team Dark relevant again?

And then, since we've already involved aliens and Ancient alien technology and the Emeralds apparently came from space... and Shadow is part alien... You see where I'm going with this?

It's just my own idea, but hey, I can dream, can't I? They could make a whole 'nother huge game if they went such a route.

Anyway, whatever they decide to do, I'm looking forward to it. Frontiers was a heck of a ride- lol, I've been on this ride almost non-stop for a year now. If Sega does as good with the next game, I definitely want to see it!

[arcplaysgames]

Do I have to say that i love Akechi because I do.

While the Thieves grab ahold of Adam Kadmon's hand to keep him in place, Joker swings up to Kadmon's face with as much drama as you have come to expect from him.

And so ends Maruki's dreams.

His shitty, shitty dreams.

Maruki admits outright that Reverie is right, he does that. But points out that the world itself is unfair. Someone can work and struggle and do everything in their power to overcome, only to be set back and crushed by a discompassionate, vicious system that they cann't escape. He just wanted to provide a better world.

Morgana, the best character in this game, points out that yeah, honestly, a lot of people would benefit from Maruki's reality. But having it forced on them is worse and takes away their own opportunity to determine the course of their own life and to grow.

MORGANA! /claps

forget all of my philosophizing and talk of ethics and shit. It all comes down to that!

Ah, Maruki. I adore you. It's been an honor beating the shit out of you.

Morgana finally achieves the impossible and turns into a Monacopter to save everyone.

And Akechi's final moments as a dude who exists and is alive is being crushed against the window and bitching loudly about it. Exquisite. /blows kiss

Everyone begins to soar off into the starry night, but oh ho!

MARUKI WANTS ONE MORE SHOT, BABY

Reverie jumps down to oblige him because like with Akechi, Maruki and Reverie have similar souls (sympathetic).

Stunning shot tbh.

I LOVE THIS MADMAN. I love the "I'm here for you."

brb beating up a fucking lab clinician with my fists while his voice finally at last cracks and he sobs out how angry he is to have lost, it's a whole-ass moment.

When he's had enough, he lays down, and the purposeful mirroring with Kasumi and Sumire is beautiful. THEIR SOULS ARE THE SAME SHAPE AND IT'S HORRIBLE.

Maruki reaches up just like Joker did as the world forgot about the existence of the Thieves and they fades away. So goes all of Maruki's beliefs and dreams.

Yeah I don't even know what to say.

This is not as bombastic and ridiculous and fun as the fight with Yaldaboath, no.

But this actually made me feel something and made me face the truth of the game. Maruki is the sun to Reverie's moon, he is the horrible absolutist nightmare of an idea that was reflected by the Thieves, softer and maybe safer but still rooted in the same wrongs.

There is a stupid thing I wrote in a stupid fic recently, where another messiah-figure talks explicitly about reforming society, and says "Utopia is a process." You can't cheat your way with magic, you can't force it on people. It is a lifelong work you will never see come to fruition, but you have to continue the work anyway.

It would be easy to drop Maruki and let him die. But what would that accomplish except another loss? You have to believe people can change, or there's no point to anything.

[otakween]

Digimon 02: D1 Tamers - Final Thoughts

Woohoo! I beat the Ryo trilogy :D -pops a party popper-

I didn't feel the need to make this multiple posts because this game is verrry similar to the last one (Tag Tamers). The main difference is that it's in glorious color! They also added a couple new features for better or for worse.

This game was fun and addicting just like the other two. There was just a little more grinding than I would hope for. The entire game took me 3 weeks to get through because of that. (Still not too shabby). Full thoughts below the cut.

Notes:

-The plot of this one felt kind of weird and forced. Firstly, I immediately got kind of confused about the chronology because the last game ended with Ken becoming the Digimon Emperor yet he's back to normal in this one. I guess either he hasn't progressed too much yet (it's only been a few days) or this is his IRL façade since we don't see him in the digi world. Anyways, the main plot is that Ryo has to fight in a tournament and if he wins said tournament then he'll become a soldier for the ~Harmonious Ones~ against Moon Millennium. I'm honestly not sure why the digi-Gods were included in this. They added nothing.

-Speaking of the Harmonious Ones, they ask you to pick one at the beginning of the game. I picked Qinglongmon because he was the only one I recognized lol. I'm not sure what the point of this choice was other than the fact that he shows up and says a couple things towards the end.

-Ken gets reduced to a guy-in-the-chair, but a very useful guy in the chair! I found the d-terminal way more handy this time around when it came to figuring out digivolution. Ken tells you exactly how many JP (Jogress points) you need to reach the next level. Honestly, it was a relief not having to tag team in this one too, that was kind of an annoying gimmick.

-Although jogress was still annoying in this game, they thankfully added an item that allows you to add +5 JPs to your digimon which made it so much easier to get some megas on my team. Also, digivolution and skills just felt more intuitive and happened faster this time around which is appreciated.

-I think they realized how OP stun was and nerfed it a bit. It's still a good feeling to win by stunning all the enemy digimon, but stun misses like 60% of the time, so you just waste your turn a lot of the time.

-Playing this right after Tag Tamers was pretty magical because I went from black and white to color (a Wizard of Oz moment). Although the inside of the dungeons were still very repetitive, the outsides were beautiful! (Showcasing some of my faves above).

-One stupid addition that made me mad was the D1 Tournament. This is a Digimon World-style AI vs. AI tournament where you just stare at the screen and hope your digimon win. It was just a slog to get through and I just wanted to get back to the dungeons. I really can't see the appeal in that sort of "gameplay." In fact, I fast forwarded or got up for a snack whenever it got to that part.

-Another lame part about this game is that you can't buy multiple items at once anymore! You could do it in Tag Tamers so why did they go backwards!? You seriously have to buy one item at a time. How dumb.

-I'm pretty proud of my final team: Metal Greymon, King Etemon, and AeroVeedramon. Metal Greymon had poison and curse, King Etemon had stun and AeroVeedramon had the best all-enemies attack. I could of gotten AeroVeedramon to mega as well, but I realized I didn't need to to win and it would have taken another few hours.

-There was a bit more variety in the dungeons compared to Tag Tamers. They all looked the same, but a lot of them had a gimmick. Some of them had puzzles or various ways you were supposed to interact with the bosses to progress. I'm glad they mixed things up a bit since the last game was really straightforward.

-Pretty hilarious that this game ends all ominously by being like "~And then we never saw Ryo again~" but then you hit the new game plus and Gennai's like "Ah, if it isn't Ryo!" Like, clearly the new game plus bit isn't part of the canon storyline, but it still made me chuckle.

-Apparently the only thing to do in new game plus is just continue raising digimon which...no thanks.

-I've heard that this acts as a prequel to Digimon Tamers which is so exciting! I'm glad that I'm doing things in the proper order. One more game (kinda-sorta?) and then I finally get to move on from Adventure 01/02 ;w;

[windor-truffle]

is this a pun??? (aka Dolphin doesn't know how to read japanese)

ok i'm going to reveal myself now as an absolute monolingual ignoramus on a site full of people who fluently speak japanese but i think i might have accidentally taught myself something whilst translating the graces perfect guide and it's making me weirdly happy so allow me to be a language-acquiring toddler for a moment and overexplain what happened tonight:

so from the beginning of this translation project i was noticing some inconsistencies in how Google Translate approached the word used to describe Ephinea in relation to Fodra. "Star" is the english word it goes for the most, but sometimes satellite which seems more correct, and this bothered me because, well, Ephinea's not a star?? Not by scientific definitions anyway, I know this is a fantasy world but you can't live on a star, it's gas. But I chalked it up to odd translation quirks and moved on, until I accidentally got a few different translated lines thanks to part of the text being cut off the first time: "A satellite of the planet Fódlan" vs "Mamoru of Planet Fódlan" vs. "guard of the planet Fodlan." The original text is, I believe, エフィネア 【[ 文 明 ・ 文 化 】 惑星 フォ ドラの衛. Anyone who can read this probably can tell exactly where I'm going but I had to learn this so please be nice to me ;_;

The romaji caught my attention here because even with my limited knowledge I was like. wait a minute mamoru I know that word. A certain dumbass won't stop saying it. Is it possible that mamoru is somehow related to the word used to define Ephinea?? Is this a pun???? And upon some isolating of characters and a reference to JapanDict I learned 3 things:

The character 星 is the one google translate likes to define as "star."

The character 衛 is the one google translate told me was mamoru, and wouldn't translate it into "guard" until I allowed it to detect Chinese, so I assume that means it's kanji? (I'm sorry I know fuck all about reading in Japanese). By itself it didn't show up in JapanDict.

But you know what DID show up? 衛星, translated to satellite or moon. It seems the characters for "mamoru" and "star," when put together, become the word for the world of Ephinea, "satellite." The themes of the game are baked into the world itself ;_;

I had to stop myself here for a minute though because like I've said so much already, I don't know the first thing about how character based languages work. Maybe this isn't a big deal at all, maybe this is just equivalent to an ESL learner getting worked up about the morpheme "cat" existing inside the word "catastrophe" when the actual root and definition of that word has nothing to do with cats.

But the thing is, context matters??? If there was a story in which feline-based disasters were happening and it was being described as a catastrophe, that would almost certainly be intentional by the writers and immediately understood as a pun by fluent speakers, probably to their chagrin. But maybe to the ESL learner with juuuust enough knowledge to understand that there is a pun, it becomes immediately delightful.

Anyway, for now I'm gonna assume that this is intentional because it seems like there are many other words for "moon" or "satellite" in Japanese and they chose the one that uses 衛. Someone who actually knows anything feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, I'd really rather have my bubble burst but learn something than go around with false conclusions I made up because of confirmation bias and a foolish attempt at teaching myself a foreign language without any actual speakers around to consult.

But in conclusion,

[atravelersnotes]

my two cents on the 4.1 event Waterborne Poetry

so, I have finally finished the main story for this event. And I am willing to admit I postponed it quite a bit because everyone trashtalking it made me less than enthusiastic to check it out, even though I had been spoiled on the fact that it revolved around one of my favorite stories in the entire game - the spring fairy - I assumed not so many people could be this horribly mistaken, right?

Well, they are, and I am here to explain why I liked this event so much. Even before the story was over it got me teary eyed with the beauty of Genshin Impact.

First things first, it is my belief that Genshin Impact is a love story. Not in the traditional sense of romantic love - not necessarily, perhaps - but a story of platonic or ideal love more likely, because a forbidden love is what caused the first recorded wave of destruction ("cataclysm") in Teyvat - when the Seelie and the (possibly human, possibly traveler-from-afar) would marry in the moon palace as witnessed by the three moon sisters, the earth was ripped asunder and the lovers tried to flee but disaster caught up, and they were forbidden to ever see eachother again.

If we believe in the idea that Teyvat is cyclic, perhaps this very story is happening again. And again. And again ... for they mustn't be together.

The story of Genshin Impact often speaks in metaphors, and at times the unsaid is just as important as the said - does mi muhe ye actually mean "I love you" ? How is Kaeya the captain of the cavalry if there are no horses in Teyvat that we know? Why are symbols like wolves, the moon, flowers in particular shapes and so many others evoked over and over? What does it all mean? Well, I don't know. This is why I am a lore theorist not a Hoyo spy, lol. I can only guess.

A lot of very important lore points were said in this event. A lot were left unsaid, but can be inferred through parallels and metaphors. A lot were lost in translation, but that's something else. Every language that's not Chinese seems to have struggled with the hidden meanings in poems. Sadly, because I feel like they're big.

But let me talk about the things I did witness - Callirhoe being obviously the biggest one and anyone who's been paying attention knew her identity as an Oceanid right away, because that's what we got in the 3.8 event and Fontaine in general too. Less obvious were her ties to the Spring Fairy story. The people complaining about them made absolutely no sense though, considering the 1.4 event Wishful Drops had the same theme lol. "I don't like events about NPCs" man how about you stop playing Genshin then, why did you even start? Since the 1.4 event the identities of the oceanids and eidolons involved in the Spring Fairy story were unclear - indeed, it seemed to be heavily implied that Rhodeia was the one Old Finch pinned for - but now it's all very clear. The possibility that things have been retconned exist for reasons I will talk about later, but anyways.

Then, the point about shapeshifting being cleared up - indeed, the human form takes away her energy and depleting it makes Callirhoe revert into a eidolon shape ; she did say to Old Finch she doesn't know when she will be able to assume a human form again, meaning, a long time. She wanted to convey her message before that. Old Finch seems to just accept that of course fairies can change forms.

Someone else had a huge character development in all of this - to Chongyun, changing forms makes her an adepti - ie, as per Liyue folklore. And then he starts wondering if his pure yang energy has something to do with it, and for the first time in his life shocking even Xingqiu he begins to wonder if it's such a bad thing to be like this. The scene in which 100% icy blue dragon eyed Chongyun goes wide-eyed at the 100% hydro blue eidolon changing forms like "whoooooa are u illuminated ms" is absolutely comical pot calling the kettle black

The event also reinforced my belief in two characteristics of elements: one, that "ice" may not be an element per se, but rather a form of water ; two, that there is a connection between it and "geo" judging by Noelle and Zhongli's appearances or roles. The explanation for the first one is Enkanomiya and the alchemy table - the sources that don't acknowledge ice isolately. The second one has a bit more convoluted of an explanation so maybe next time, but there is an island in which we find a combination of dendro, hydro and geo slimes that's hard to not pass by. We know the slimes' appearances in a territory means something about it as per Zhongli's story and we also know land needs water to produce flowers, and, well, perhaps just like irminsul (Did Morax Create It?) assumes a flower shape on land (ley lines disorders) and has hydro blue veins and all that. So that's the gist of my theory - maybe some time ...

The last point I want to address, and that perhaps was the most relevant to the deep lore of Genshin as I see it, is that this event showed us the perspective of love of different characters. And so we can compare and contrast to that which we already knew.

Endora's Educational Notes from the Wishful Drops event states -

Love. For Oceanids, this is to meld together as one. There will be no division then. That is why Oceanids need no learning or thoughts of their own. All that is needed is love. It seems that Oceanids cannot love others, for others will only drown in the embrace of pure waters. So they disguise themselves as the dreams of young children, and withdraw from the lives of all other people. [...] Love, that is our destiny. But I still have a whole world left to see.

Their definition of love is... almost LCL-like interesting. To meld together as one - perhaps this is why she says "when the stars in the night sky have all gone out, and all streams and dreams have mingled in the same ocean… then, we will meet again" to Old Finch in Wishful Drops. We keep hearing in Fontaine lore that all the waters will merge together. (that sounds a bit like a flood. Guizhong anyone? Fontaine submerging? whatevers) but in her saying it seems like she is suggesting that she will also meet Old Finch when that happens. Unless Old Finch is somehow from Fontaine, perhaps there is more to it all (hint: it's the abyss - it's absolutely the abyss she spoke of !! source: trust me ~ )

To Paimon she should talk to Old Finch because if they're eachother's "love of their lives" they would certainly still want to see eachother. This shows that Paimon whatever she is views love as something everlasting and unbreakable, unmistakenly so. A romantic perhaps like the moon that witnessed the seelie marriage, or... the "sinner" seelie herself? Or, even, the "villain" that opposed the seelie marriage and needs to make an effort to separate those lovers for eternity Or Else - who knows?

On the other hand, while characters like Mika and Paimon were supporting Callirhoe, two characters were nowhere to be seen: Xingqiu, who is obsessed with poetry and was off to write some (fuck the rules) and Noelle who was off to work. Everyone else in the event (Diona, Chongyun, Mika) had a cryo vision. In other words: Xingqiu was swept away by the feelings of it all, while Noelle was basically unfazed by it And Then There Is Cryo. Interesting! We don't know at this point much about the deep lore and can only guess who is going to be friend or foe in the future so this is merely food for thought ...

Lastly, not to jump too hard in the "Genshin Impact is a queer game" bandwagon because I truly feel this is a lot more convoluted of a topic than people like to pretend it is, for many reasons, but I did write a Tartali manifesto once that touched on the topic of love in the Genshin lore as well as the dynamics between elements and some flower symbolism and I truly love how the event not only legitimated the flower symbolism and parallels between flowers of different nations but expanded on them and brought new interpretations to the table. The parallel between the sweet flowers and the "sweetness" of Barbara (a hydro user? indeed, indeed) is made as explicit as the similarities between the Qingxin and the Cecilia which are both white flowers that grow in... peculiar places - namely, wherever the elemental energy of the land is stronger ie strong winds and tall mountains, respectively.

With all that this event has expanded on symbolism of key items, characters and elements, it does surprise me that so many people can't see past the concrete "it's an event about NPCs" into the "these NPCs are a metaphor to the greater lore of THE FUCKING GAME" . At a certain point I was wandering above the water with Wanderer and suddenly had thoughts of Raiden Ei creating him to be free (and her obsession... with anemo kind of shows in her statue of the omnipresent god really. Why are Barbatos and the omnipresent god - who still looks an awful lot like Paimon to me - the only winged statues and what did she want exactly .. ) and how we actually use him to do stuff like float above water - in the event Paimon is like "don't ask me to do it! yes I fly but I can't do that" and in Fontaine this happens too. I've been using Scara a lot for exploring so I keep thinking about it - he is the only character that "flies" or at least does something close to it and he is Raiden Ei's will, her puppet creation. What were her aspirations then? The event also got me thinking about the Goddess of Flowers who was known for talking about sussy things under the moon and water flowed from her body ... As it kept evoking night and moon and stars imagery when talking about Old Finch and Callirhoe - almost stating their similarities to the seelie marriage that wasn't. Another forbidden love story that couldn't be for reasons unknown.

But well, guess some people can't see past the grind and it shows. And oh boy, isn't that a metaphor for our real world at large lol.