#anyway it's ok guys im just a bit drunk. it's fine <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[andorerso]

.

my job is an absolute fucking trainwreck but I fear leaving it, my grandmother probably won't make it to October, I'm nearly 30 and still can't afford to live on my own, I gained so much weight that I no longer feel good about myself, I have basically given up on love, I have no hope of ever accomplishing my dream of becoming an author, and I feel like a giant fucking failure and loser in all aspects of life

but at least rebelcaptain week's coming up <3

[kikiswriting7]

Take a Chance ✵ JJK ✵ MYG - 3

✵ Pairing: Yoongi x Reader x Jungkook

✵Summary: Y/N just move across the world to start her University. She is paired with a roommate who is complete social butterfly and makes a bet, Y/N needs to take more chances. And at the hint of her new found friend, her social and romantic life take a dramatic turn.

✵Tags/Warnings: Smut, College AU, red flag, sexual tension. angst, dirty talking, drinking, friends with benefits, full of cliches, friends to lover, temptation

✵Notes: Hi guys! Took a while to update this on AO3 BUT here you go! Let me know what you think <3

lots of love, Kiki

CHAPTER 3 - DAWN

Once more I wake up with the worst hungover. But this time it feels even worse. What the hell happened for me to get like this? I am still wearing last nights clothes and with make up on.  The last thing I remember is Gabi asking those stupid “Drink If” questions. I groan as I leave the bed holdind my head in between my hands. Ugh Im never touching alcohol again. I get up and go to the bathroom in hopes that washing my face with cold water would chase this terrible feeling away.

I reach the bathroom and splash the ice cold water on my face. The only thing that takes it away is the fogness of yesterdays events and everything comes all at once. Us all getting drunk and deciding to go for a walk at the beach late into the evening. Jungkook showing the constelations holding my hand. Coming back home worse. Falling asleep on the couch. Jungkooks strongs arms carring me to my room. Tucking me into bed and leaving shortly after. I look myself in the mirror with pure shock. 

“Fuck…. Eli” I groan. I gamble that she would’ve slept over and go to Gabi’s room where I find them both laying bed looking at their phones. They both just look over their screens but don’t say a word. 

Gabi moves over a bit and pats over the space in between the two. I crawl to the spot and lay face down on the soft and sweet smelling pillow. I let out a groan. 

“I feel like dying” I say the sound muffled by the pillow. 

“you are not alone sister” I receive gentle taps on my back. I sit back down on the bed facing both of them. 

“I’m so sorry for last night, Eli. I swear I didn’t intend to any of that to happen” I say to her with sorrowfull eyes

“I mean, thank you for saying that. I guess hes not really into me anyway. So its fine. Don’t worry about it.” She shrugs

“I promise I will not do anything with him.” I offer.

“its ok if you do honestly. It good that this bandaid was ripped off sooner rather then later. It would’ve definetly hurt much more.” She shrugs it off. 

“do you still feel like to have that movie night today?” gabi asks “We both totally understand if you don’t” I nod in agreement with her. 

“I can text him not to come. I don’t feel very well anyway. I bet he might not be the best either.”

“I mean, we can still be friends. He geniualy seems like a nice guy, just not interested in me like that. So that’s ok. We can still hang out.” She adds, even though with a sad look on her face. 

I give her a hug laying down on top of her. “Are we good then? I was honestly worried that you would be mad at me”

“We are good, don’t worry” she hugs me back laughing “now get off, you are smashing me” she taps my back and grunts. 

With a smile I lay back down between them. Pulling my own phone out of my pocket. 

My heart races as I see the message I received not too long ago. I gasp and both of them immediately look to find out what cause such a reaction. I spring up and scratch my eyes. 

Gabi sitting next to me and pulling my phone out of my hand reading the text out loud. 

 “Good morning! I was wondering if you are up for coffee? I know a place nearby that is quite good”

She slaps my arm. “why are you not up yet!? Go get ready!” motioning me to hurry up.

“Gabi I feel like death has come for me this morning…. I don’t know If I have the energy to go out right now”

“Girl I don’t care, you are still breathing. Go brush your teeth and change.” She says giving a fake smile. “NOW!”

I look to Eli for support but she just shrugs and goes back to being busy with her phone. 

“plus…” she says with her evil grin  “I already texted him yes.” She shows me the phone “he says he will be here in 10 to pick you up” 

My eyes go wide and yank the phone out of her hand. Reading back the messages. She really did send those messages. Oh my god.

“Im going to kill you” I say under my breath

“Well, better be after you get ready. Chop chop” she claps her hands. 

I immediately get up and rush back to my room trying to fix something else to wear. I exchange the black fluff sweater for a hoodie and try to fix the eye liner from last night that makes me look more like a panda than human. 

Once I think that is good enough I quickly brush my teeth and rush to the door to put on a pair of shoes and leave the house. My keys still in the pocket of my jacket from last night is a blessing. If I rush more then this I think I might be sick. I take a deep breath and get my composure back, taking it easy to reach outside. 

I see Yoongi waiting outside the apartment with his phone in his hand. 

“Hey stranger” I say leaving the building. He looks up and gives a small smile. 

“Was about to text you” he shakes his phone and quickly puts back in his pocket.  

It was a cold day but it was sunny, making it a more pleasureble temperature. The perfect day to not have a hungover. But here I was. 

The walk to the café is pleasant. Indeed its not far from my place and the place looks quite cozy. It full of books and it leads to a nice garden. We find a place at a corner all the way at the end of the place overlooking the garden that must be beautiful during spring and summer. The café was quite busy having breakfast and chitchatting. The atmosphere was defintely inviting to stay hours on end. 

“What is your poison?” he asks me before sitting down

“Honestly, a latte would be a killer right now.” I say following it with a quick thanks.

A few moments later he comes back with a tray with more stuff then I thought he would bring. He places my latte in front of me. 

“I was not sure what you would like right now, but I also got a strawberry short cake. Its yours if you like it.” He takes the iced americano from the tray and the chocolate muffin. 

The cake even though, simple looked perfect. Layers of cake, cream and straberries making the slice very appealing. 

I bite my lip before removing the little plate from the tray giving him a smile “Its actually my absolute favorite. Thank you!” which I only receive a small grin in return. 

“So what have you been up to this weekend?” I ask him between bites of the heavenly cake.

“Nothing much.  I’ve spent most of the night busy trying to fix this track I started to make, other then that nothing much more exciting.” He counters.

“Yeah I wish…” I say sighing getting lost in thought from last night. My heart rushing at the thought of Jungkook. No, I tell myself. Nothing can happen. Even after Eli said it was fine. 

“Rough night for you too?” He asks taking me back to reality.

“I swear I’m never drinking again” and rest my head on my hand. He chuckles 

“Yeah JK said you guys were quite drunk” he says casually. But I almost choke on my hot drink 

“Oh I didn’t know you were friends?” I ask him trying to sound casual but probably failing miserably. 

“yeah we are in the same friend group. Well, that and we all share a house. We’ve all known eachother for some years now.” he says taking his attention back to his half eaten muffin. 

I hope he didn’t see my absolute shocked face. But I honestly don’t think I’ll ever be that lucky. Great. Of course they were friends. Did JungKook say anything else to him? Was this why he was being friendly to me? 

“Ah that’s nice…” which is all I can gather to say. He just nods. 

After some small talk and finishing our food the place seem it got busier, with people coming for brunch. The headache still brewing in my brain not giving me pantience, I pinch the bridge of my nose. 

Yoongi seems to notice “ Hey are you feeling ok?”

“Not really” there is no use in lying right now “To be honest I have the worse hungover.”

“No worries we can hang out more on another day”

“I mean, do you want to come over?” I blurt out as we leave the place “Yesterday night, Gabi, Eli and Kook set up to have a movie chill day, I guess.” Now it was his turn to seem bothered. The frown quickly dissolved from his face as it foes back to its neutral face. 

“What are you guys watching?” He asks

“Honestly, I don’t know… If it were by me I would stay hidden under my blankets and nap the entire afternoon.” I say to him “and I’m not even sure if he will show up, since I guess he also drank a lot last night.” 

“Oh, he will” he quickly replies but before I can ask what he means we reach the apartmetn building again. 

I arch an eyebrow at him after unlocking the door as in question “So are you coming or not?” Looking over my shoulder with the door open.

He doesn’t take long to react, following me back into the building. With a shy smile, I lead the way to the apartment in silence. 

The living room is thankfully empty. Perfect. We sit next to eachother on the couch, and decide that the best thing for hungover cure is to watch random youtube videos. The late morning and afternoon passes fast, we left it to fate to decide what to watch, meaning the suggested tab. And after laughing over funny cats compilations, radom travel vlogs and deciding that Japan is should be everyones number one country in their bucketlist, Gabi comes out of her room walking loudly as if to annouce her arrivel and sporting a grin. 

“Sorry, but you were not responding your texts” she smiles at me “Just to let you know JungKook is on his way, he just called me. By the way very nice to meet you! I’m Gabi” She makes her way to give him a small hug that takes him by surprise. His wide eyes looking over her shoulder in search for help, but all he got was a small chuckle. 

Eli doesn’t take long to come to the living room, introducing herself too but this far with just a wave from her hand and a head nod. As if in cue with Eli sitting down, the doorbell rings. Gabi excitingly hops to the door to open it.  On the other side, wearing some loose jeans and a long sleeve, was jungkook holding a tub of ice cream. Gabi is quick to give him a hug and his smile turns into a surprised look when he notices Yoongi in the living room. 

“Let me put this in the freezer” Gabi takes out the ice cream from JungKooks hands and hops back to the kitchen, meanwhile JungKook greets briefly Yoongi and takes a seat on the empty corner of the couch. Trying to avoid much eye contact with either of us. 

“Weren’t you guys all super drunk yesterday?” Yoongi asked to nobody in particular

“Yup” JungKook replies first

“Is she always like that?” He asks again pointing to where Gabi disapeared. Which gets us all agreeing at the same time 

“She says her superpower is to not get hungover” I add while Gabi gets back to the living room.

“ All righty! Super fun!” She drops the small bowl of snacks at the centre table “I guess you guys know eachother?” she asks looking between JungKook and Yoongi. 

“Yeah we are friends for a few years and we live together now that he is also is studying here” Yoongi replies giving a small grin to Jungkook who only smiles back in return, relaxing a bit more on the chair

“Great! So what do you guys feel like watching?”

The debate gets intense when Eli says she would like to watch a romcom and Yoongi suggests a new spy movie that just come out. Gabi sugests a Disney movie that gets quickly shut down by both Eli and Yoongi. For me, I honestly couldn’t care less about what we watch. Both me and Jungkook are watching the heated argument and when we lock eyes we both give a quiet laugh at the situation that we find ourselves in. 

At the end, since it was hard to everyone accept the same movie, we ended up doing a quiz, which resulted in us watching both of the DeadPool movies. The entire time Eli was disgusted and just like Gabi was quick to be on her phone. Yoongi, JungKook and I would laugh and snort at the terrible jokes made throughout.  When the movies were finally over, Eli bids her farewells earning a pout from Gabi. Shortly after both the boys also leave together. They were definetly were good company, I think to myself. Even though it is a bit strange to have all that tension in the room in the beginning. 

Once I start tidying up the living room I notice Gabi just staring with a raised eyebrow and a smirk, waiting to be acknoledged. 

I roll my eyes and say my own good night and leave her. I definetly don’t wanna talk about it whatever she thinks we need to talk about. 

Classes the next day are boring, and I cannot wait for this day to be over. Unfortunately, even though we are on the same course, Gabi and Eli are on different schedules then mine, leaving me to suffer by myself. 

Lunch time couldn’t come fast enough. Lunch at school was quite fun. The food was made by the first years of our course and managed by the third years. In their semester they learn how to operate different departments and the third years how to run different outlets. After settling for a deliciously smelling creamy pasta, I spot Gabi and Eli searching for a spot to sit. 

A hand shoots up and JungKook calls out for Gabi, which leads to us three sitting at his table with his friends. Jin and Taehyung are also there. I sit next to Taehyung, Gabi and Eli on the opposite side next to Jungkook and Jin. 

Suddenly someone drops on the seat next to mine “You know, we are so hurt that we were not invited to your movie night yesterday.” I look to the person next to me, only to find Jimin pouting. 

“The fact that Yoongi was there, makes it hurt even more” Jin says elbowing Gabi. 

“Hey its not my fault” she says “Shes the one who invited him” motioning to me with her head while taking a bit of her sandwich. 

Her call out earned some smirks from the others on the table except Jungkook who, normally is very talkative, staring at his own plate in silence. 

I roll my eyes “It’s not like that.” Which only provokes a snort from taehyung. “Well if you all are so butt hurt, feel free to also join next time.” I try to ignore but my phone buzzes with a new notification. 

JIMIN added you to a new group .

I roll my eyes but honestly finding it quite fun. I miss having the chaos of my friend group from back home, and I’m eager to create these new friendships here. 

 “Ok so next movie night is tomorrow at your place right?” Jimin asks cocking his head at me.

“You cannot just invite yourself” I say trying to shrug him off.

“Though luck” He says “I just did, sweetheart” JungKook laughs at the audacity of his friend.

“Can we please watch something else then?” Eli is the one to say now “Like some romantic comedy or even a Disney movie..” she tries.

“Yes!” Jimin jumps from his seat earning from me a side eye.

All of our phone’s buzz at once with a notification

Yoongi:  ? 

Jimin: Tomorrow movie night at Gabi and YN’s place

Jimin: Presence is mandatory. 

“Don’t mind him” Taehyung says lower to me “If you guys don’t feel like it just tell him off” he shrugs, clearly his friends energy is something that sometimes needs to be ignored. Well, at this point, I can relate, since Gabi’s energy is much the same. 

When I look back to them Gabi and Jimin are excitedly making plans about what we should eat and watch. Both matching each other’s energy, with Jin, Jungkook and Eli, casually adding or removing things from their plan. 

Here we go, I think to myself.  

Indeed, Gabi and Jimin are the on the same side of the coin. Their similarities don’t end at their energy to make plans with their friends. They burst out singing, dancing or their new favorite activity: bother each other. 

It has almost been a week since the last movie night with all of them, and at this point Jimin is set in making this a tradition. Every Sunday, everyone gathers to watch a movie. The first time we all got together, was a bit strange. All of them showed up. Even Yoongi, who Jimin kept teasing that apparently never leaves his house during the week. The teasing earned him a flick on the forehead earlier in the day. 

JungKook also back down on his flirting since the Beach Incident. Even though the way we held hands keeps finding its way back to my thoughts. Eli also seems to be over her crush on JK since apparently, she and Gabi saw him with another girl on last night, at a bar. Good for him, I guess. 

I told myself that I would only let myself go out on weekends as I can just relax for the next couple of days, and that is how I managed to drag myself to this sports bar.

The same way Jimin has the same traits as Gabi, he also is earning a spot closer to me. Gabi swears she is not jealous of him stealing her spotlight, but that just adds fuel to his bickering. Which is exactly what is happening right now. 

“I already told you to drop it Jimin. I - ” she then points to herself in a very dramatic way  “am the best friend. You just arrived at the train and wants to sit at the window. I think not” 

I roll my eyes “Or…. Hear me out….” I add like it’s a secret  “We could all be best friends” I say with a fake smile

“No” they add in unison. Giving each other a side eye when they realize they said it together. 

“Yeah, I will go get another shot” I say promptly getting up. 

“I will go get it for you bestie” Gabis shoots up

“Sit” I say in a serious tone, and she immediately falls back to her chair with a pout. 

The sports bar that we chose to spent Friday evening was not at all crowded. Jin suggested that we all get together at this sports bar close to campus as there were multiple matches they were interested in watching. Of course, most of them were late. The bar was actually quite cozy. The walls were nicely decorated, big TV’s divided the space with all sorts of sports paraphernalia. There was also a pool table, a tarts board and next to it sitting corner with brown leather couches, where we decided to wait for the rest. 

As soon as I reach the bar, and lean against it, the bartender, a friendly-looking guy with a neatly trimmed beard, approaches with a smile.

"What can I get for you?" he asks, wiping down the counter.

"3 shots of tequila, please," I reply, glancing back at Gabi and Jimin, who are now engaged in a heated debate about who knows me better. Their antics bring a smile to my face.

As the bartender prepares my drink, I notice as familiar faces are entering the bar and make their way casually to the couches in the back. The bartender hands me the shots, and I nod my thanks and quickly pay before making my way back to our corner. As I approach, I catch snippets of conversation.

“Now, this is what im talking about!” Jimin eagerly takes the second shot from my hand and passes to Gabi. 

“and where is our shot?” Jin asks with an eyebrow raised. 

“This is their reward for arriving on time and hello to you too” I say and clink my glass with theirs before downing the strong drink while making a face. Gabi acts like she just had a shot of water. I honestly don’t know what type of mutant that she is. 

We all settle into a comfortable rhythm of conversation and laughter, As the night progresses, the sports games fade into the background, and the focus shifts entirely to our group. We play a few rounds of pool, Jimin and JungKook teaming up against Gabi and me. Gabi’s competitive streak comes out in full force, and we end up winning by a narrow margin, much to Jimin’s mock dismay.

“Okay, okay, you win this round,” Jimin concedes, throwing his hands up in defeat. “But next time, we’re definitely taking you down.”

“Dream on,” Gabi retorts, a triumphant grin on her face.

Eventually, we all go back to being around the couches and we are slightly buzzed from the drinks we had for the last hour or so. The conversation turns to future plans, ideas for the next movie night, and upcoming events on campus.

Just as we’re about to decide on the final plans for our next gathering, the door to the bar swings open again, and a familiar figure steps in.

“Well, now this is going to be interesting” Jimin settles back in the couch putting one arm around my shoulder and we all turn to see who just entered the bar. 

It’s Yoongi, and he’s not alone. He’s with a girl I’ve never seen before, her arm casually linked with his. She has this dumb smile splattered across her face and he has his usual unbothered look. They head toward the couches where our group is sitting. I feel an unexpected knot tighten in my stomach.

“Yoongi, who’s your friend?” Jin asks, his eyes twinkling with curiosity as our friend aproaching. 

“This is Mina,” Yoongi introduces her with a small smile. “We met at the record store a few days ago.”

Mina waves shyly, and the group greets her warmly. I try to force a smile, but it feels more like a grimace. It’s unlike Yoongi to bring someone new into the group, and I can’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy seeing him with her.

 “I was starting to think you’d ditch us for another quiet night in.” Jimin is the one to talk now, with a playfull smirk on his lips and I know that he loves poking at people. 

Yoongi chuckles. “Not this time. Besides, I’ve been out all day. Might as well end it with some good company.” He says looking at me with an intense gaze. 

Gabi and Jimin resume their playful banter, and while everyone else seems to be taken with Mina, I can’t shake my irritation. She laughs at all the right moments, shares interesting stories, and fits in seamlessly, which only makes me feel worse. My eyes keep drifting back to Yoongi and Mina, and every time she leans and touches him again and againa, I feel like rolling my eyes until its stuck in the back of my head. 

It seems that JungKook notices my distraction and asks the group if anyone wants more drinks. Everyone states what they are drinking, with a quick thanks, and goes back to the conversation with Mina, who is now sharing about a new exhibition coming to town next week.

“Hey, can you help me out with the drinks?” Jungkook asks closer to me as he reaches out a hand to pull me from Jimin's side.

We reach the bar, and he is quick to order everyone's drinks. I honestly don’t know how he managed to keep up with so many different orders.

“Hey, you okay?” he asks quietly, concern evident in his eyes.

“Yeah, just tired,” I lie, offering a weak smile.

He doesn’t seem convinced but lets it drop. The conversation continues at the corner of the bar, but I honestly don’t really feel like listening. Instead, I’m focused on Yoongi and Mina, trying to decipher their relationship. Are they just friends? Is there something more? My thoughts spiral, making it hard to concentrate on anything else. Mina’s laughter rings out again, and it grates on my nerves. I try to push the feeling down, reminding myself that Yoongi is just a friend. I can’t assume that any guy who is remotely nice is into me.

Mina's drink is the last one to be poured. When the bartender finishes pouring her stupid rose wine, I turn to the bartender and add to the order, “Can I actually also have another shot?” I ask him.

“Make it two,” Jungkook quickly adds, drawing closer to me. “If you’re tired, that will knock you right out, sweetheart.”

I take my glass and clink it against Jungkook’s, and I look back at the others sitting. Yoongi catches my eye, and I lift my drink in cheer to him with a ghost of a smile on my lips, before downing it without making a face this time. The burning is welcomed by my throat.

I help Jungkook bring back the cups on a tray, handing them to each of their owners, and plop down back next to Jimin, who barely notices me as he now starts an argument with Jin over which one is the best video game of all time.

Just as I’m about to excuse myself for some fresh air, Yoongi catches my eye. There’s something unreadable in his expression, and for a moment, I wonder if he can sense my unease. He leans over to say something to Mina, and before he can get up, Jk, stands up first. “Going out for a smoke” he announces “anyone care to join?” he asks generally but his playfull eyes fall on mine. 

“yeah lets go!” Gabi jumps up, and follows Jk. I also get up to follow them, maybe some fresh _smokey_ air will help me clear my head, of this unreasenable dislike of Mina, and improve my mood. I cannot be like this the entire night. I need to get it together, and fast.

As I was about to pass him, I feel a warm hand wrap around my wrist, stopping me. “I thought you didn’t smoke?” he says more in a statement then a questioning tone. 

“I don’t. Just going to make them company” I brush it off.

The frown that crosses his face comes as fast as it goes, and I believe that if I blinked I would have missed it. Mina enthusiastically, turns to him to ask his opinion on some music, that now she was discussing with Jimin, 

“You coming, sweetheart?” Jk asks standing not too far, as Gabi is distractedly putting on her coat. Yoongi lets go of my hand and turns to give her attention.

Outside, the air is chilly thanks to our proximity to the beach. Gabi and Jungkook are already chatting animatedly, the glow of their cigarettes illuminating their faces.  Gabi enthusiastically telling stories of her life back in her home country and  how she got so high once that she hallucinated she was in Paris. Our laughter echoes across the empty street.

Gabi apparently was a quick smoker as she was already taking the last drag of her cigarrate, shivering with the cold. “as much as I love your company guys, I think I lost all sensation to my extremities.” She states, a shiver clearly running through her. I chuckle as shes quickly makes her way back inside. 

JungKook nudges me playfully. “Come on, sweetheart,” he says, his breath visible in the cool night air. “Let’s join the smokers’ club.” He holds a laugh raising his eyebrows. I roll my eyes at his remark. 

“Nah, thanks” I brush him off. “I mean… good for you” he says, taking another drag. “this shit kills”

I chuckle. At least he knows. Jungkook is talking about one of our teachers, and how he doesn’t know how he will pass her exams if the classes continue being this boring. 

“Jungkook, its ethics. How did you expect it to be?”I ask with a small laugh,  but my eyes inevitably drift back to Yoongi and Mina. They’re sitting close, their shoulders almost touching, and I can’t help but wonder what they share. I look back at Jk, who is tossing his finished cigarate away, and I expect him to hush us inside. Instead, he leans against the brick wall, exhaling the last of the smoke. “You know,” he says, “sometimes it’s hard to figure people out.”

I raise an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

He nods toward Yoongi and Mina. “Take them, for instance. Are they just friends? Or is there something more?”

I sigh. “I wish I knew.”

JungKook chuckles. “Life’s full of mysteries, isn’t it? Like why Jin insists on wearing mismatched socks or why Jimin thinks he’s the world’s best dancer.”

I laugh, grateful for the distraction. “And why Eli can’t resist buying every cute stationery item she sees.”

“Exactly.” JungKook steps closer. “But sometimes, the answers surprise us. Maybe tonight will be one of those nights.” He winks and nudges me 

As we go back inside, to the comforting warmth of the bar I remind myself that Yoongi is just a friend—a complicated, enigmatic friend. 

Previous ✧ Next

add yourself to the TAGLIST

[tobioslune]

liquid courage

Paring: Iwaizumi Hajime x gn!reader

Genre : fluff, comfort? college au kinda, best friends to lovers, mutual pining, Iwaizumi being soft and a simp

Warnings? : implied drinking, (aged up), cursing (from the lyrics), a little smooch 

a/n: This is a draft i started in january but things happened that made me leave it for about like four months lol (if u wanna know what happened while i was writing this you can read it here lol also you could see how i wrote / continued writing it here ) but! im finally finished and im pretty proud of it even though its lowkey all over the place :>> please do check out the song bc it slaps and it’s really good lol okay that’s all for now hope you enjoy <3 (last notee: likes and reblogs are really appreciated!!)

▶ now playing : drunk - dijon 

You and Iwaizumi have been close friends since highschool, and feelings may have been caught during that time. With the reason of not wanting to ruin the relationship you’ve built with him, you tried to brush it off. And like every other trope where you fall for your best friend you expected that he wouldn’t feel the same way.

Surprisingly both of you ended up going to the same university, and you were able to hang out and keep in touch with each other. Everytime you think you’ve set those feelings aside, whenever some romantic tension presents itself, it bubbles up inside all over again. Like an annoying weed that keeps coming back no matter how hard you try to get rid of it. 

School and other work has been pressing on you for the past few months and you just keep getting into a slump. No matter how hard you try, you find yourself in the same place you were over and over again. Iwaizumi noticed this and really tried his best to help but he’s also caught up with a ton of things. 

O baby, I’m lonely and I’m fucked up by myself

 Could uu come here?!  

It was 1am on a Saturday and Mattsun called you. You were working on an essay and it was super unexpected. It was able to shake you from the somewhat trance you were in while trying to think.

“Hey y/n-san I’m so sorry to call you at such a late time and most probably not so nice notice, but is it okay if you pick-up Hajime here at our usual place? Hanamaki and the others have already left and theres a paper I need to take care of, and you’re the only one I could think of.”

“Oh, it’s okay. Did Hajime drink too much like last time?” You think to yourself, ‘How stubborn, I’ve told him last time to be mindful of how much he takes because of his low tolerance’  You found the thought quite amusing.

“He sure has. When will you be able to get here by the way?” Mattsun replies.

“Give me about 15 minutes, it’s not so far from where I live anyways. Can you keep him company for a little while longer?” you tell him. This would be able to get your mind off the stress and exhaustion you’re in hopefully for a little while. Besides you haven’t met him in person for about month so it would be nice to see him again.

“Yeahh I can do that. Thanks again by the way y/n.”

“Suree, anytime. Okay see you in a bit, bye”

“Bye.”

The train stations are already closed at this time, and it would be too much of a hassle to take a cab to and from where he lives so it probably would be best that he crash at your place instead.

You straighten a few things up in your apartment and proceed to grab a jacket, your keys, wallet and your phone, placing it into a small purse. As you closed the door you could already feel a rush of cold air surrounding you.

The walk there was quite refreshing and you felt much better than you did earlier. As you arrived there you could see Mattsun waiting in front. You smiled as you walked toward him. It took him a couple seconds to recognize you as you came into view. 

“Heyy, hope I didn’t take too long” you said as you greeted him with a hug. 

“No, it’s all good you actually arrived faster than I expected”, Mattsun replies returning your smile. 

“He’s inside by the way.” gesturing with the back of his thumb.

“Okay, I’ll go take care of it from here” 

“Thanks again, apologies if it interrupted anything important.” 

“Like I said, it's alright! I got it.” you assure him.

You both bid your goodbyes and you make your way inside the homey bar. There he was, head resting on his right hand and glass of water in the other. You figured he sobered up at least a little bit. 

You let out an amused sigh, “Oh Haj, I’ve told you a couple of times last time to watch it, right?” You took a seat in front of him, leaning your head on your hand. He laughed a little at the statement made. “Sorry y/n, got a bit caught up and forgot.” 

Letting out a low hum you respond, “Anyways, ready to go?” 

“Yeah just give me a moment.” His head was still pounding from the drinks.

I’M WASTING and I’m anxious; I’m fading from myself… 

You placed his arm around your shoulder in an attempt to keep him upright and stable as you walk. Compared to him he was obviously heavier making it difficult for you to even make it to the door, you were basically stumbling out, but somehow you were able to manage and he was at least trying to cooperate even when everything was practically hazy for him in that moment.

---------- 

You fell for him, and little did you know he did too. You’ve known Hajime as reserved, reliable, firm, caring and surprisingly stubborn at times. He knew that if he told his friends and teammates they would tease him and make it more obvious that's why he kept it in a never said a word. 

He liked you, he liked you so much, but sometimes you just seemed so out of reach to him. Loved by almost everyone, you were beautiful, charming and just overall amazing to him. There were times where he really tried to deny his feelings, his emotions, toward you but whenever another guy would be around you he just can’t help but want you all to himself.

--------

As school progressed your schedule became more hectic and your assignments started to pile up. It felt like an endless mess and an inevitable disaster. He saw how stressed you were but he felt a bit helpless because he didn't know what to do. He couldn’t really help you because of your different courses and besides he wouldn’t even know what to do. As time went on your hangouts became lesser and lesser and sometimes you'd even be too busy or even too tired to chat with him. You would try making plans but your group mates would suddenly set up meetings or deadlines would abruptly be sent and given. 

Although he has tried reaching out, because of how busy you were he was left alone with his thoughts and feelings and he tried to make sense of how he really felt. He wanted to avoid thinking of you but that became difficult for him when almost everything reminded him of you…

“They would have liked this..”, “I should probably ask if they ate.”,  “This would be such a nice gift for y/n.”,  “I wonder what they would think of this.”, it just felt like never ending thoughts of you.

---------

When Matsukawa and the rest of the old team from Seijoh offered him to hang out and catch up he couldn't say no. By going he would be able to hang out with them and it would hopefully be a distraction to help get you off his mind. He knew you were busy and in his head he thought that maybe you didn't like him the say he does. You ran circles around his mind and at time he’s just feel so conflicted and confused.

In the end he got wasted, he felt faded, and just wanted to feel ok. He accidentally ended up telling the boys out of frustration that he had feelings for someone which left him with mixed emotions at times. They found this quite surprising because who would get him so hung up and drunk like that.

COULD U COME HERE?! And say u’ll stay the night 

Although you reminded him last time you went drinking to watch his intake you were still shocked that he was so drunk he could barely think straight. The cold air and silence filled the walk and everything in some way felt alright. You felt at peace and his presence made everything feel comfortable even if you were practically carrying him.

He sighs, “Hey I'm sorry I dragged you into this mess I accidentally let myself go back there again.” 

“It's ok, I mean that's bound to happen to everyone at some point I've got you  don't worry it's fine.” you respond.

“Where are we going, by the way?” He asks.

“I'm taking you back to my place, I mean if you don't mind. The subways are closed and the taxis are hard to come by at this time.” 

“Oh ok, it's fine, I mean I have nowhere else to go to anyways and I don't really mind,”  He says with a flustered laugh.

As you keep walking you pass by a convenience store you both frequently used to hang out at when your schedules weren't so busy.

“Hey Haj, we should stop there for a while just so you could sober up a little more. Also I’m a bit hungry anyway,”  you suggest.

“Yeah good idea, besides you must be kind of tired trying to carry me around for this long.”

You both make your way to the convenience store and you tell him to sit outside while you buy something for the both of you.

 Cause it’s been a while, since I've seen u smiling! O baby, could u come down? I think I’m freaking out! And I’m drunk! 

You step inside and the warmth of the shop embraces you. You then proceed to get some meat buns, and two coffees. As you go to pay you take a glimpse outside to check up on Iwaizumi and to your surprise he was already looking at you. You quickly turn away and you feel a small blush attempting to creep up on your face, but you shake the thought away as you make it to the counter.

You finish paying and walk over to where Iwaizumi is sitting and you place the food down on the table. Handing over a meat bun and a coffee to him, you sit down and sigh in satisfaction as you bite into yours. Somewhat comfortable silence fills the space and you absentmindedly process everything that happened.

“So, how was the hang out with the guys? I haven't seen them in so long. You sure must’ve had fun...” You say in the hopes of making things a little less awkward and quiet.

“Oh yeah it was great.” He replies with his mouth still with food, you laugh and he continues after he finally swallows what he was eating.

“Yeah it was really fun, we got to catch up on a lot and they're doing pretty great I must say. You should come next time, I mean when you're not busy. I miss our hangouts, you know...” 

“Is this not a hangout?” You humorously ask.

“I mean, it is but I'm saying we should hang out more when you're not busy and when I'm not drunk.”  He says with a laugh.

“Yeah we totally should.“ You say with a smile.

“So anyways, how's life?” 

“Well I mean I'm doing ok, but overall just really stressed. Work and papers have been piling up and my head has been pounding for like weeks or maybe even just days you know, but I guess I'm doing fine.” Giving a small laugh to lighten the statement.

“Yeah the workloads really suck right now, they're crazy. But I'm here for you if you need anything even if I don’t really understand a thing from your subjects.”

“Yeah, I know.” You say giving him a reassuring grin.

You both take a brief pause when he suddenly brings up an old inside joke you both had when you were younger. You spend about an hour reliving memories, throwing around jokes, teasing each other and laughing a lot.

Sighing into a smile he says, “I really miss this. It's been a while since I've seen you smile like that.” 

“Yeah I missed our hangouts like these, this feels so great and nostalgic in a way.”

And I don’t think I can beat it, I’m paralyzed, I’m terrified of being alone!

You both clean up and start to continue your walk back to your place. All the stress you’ve been feeling earlier feels as if it has left and you feel relieved. As you both near your apartment complex, Iwaizumi stops making you turn back.

“Hey, you okay?” You ask.

“Yeah I’m good.” You then proceed to turn around, but he suddenly continues.

“Listen I need to tell you something, and I need you to promise me that we’re still going to be ok even as friends afterwards.” He says with a slight seriousness on his face

“Yeah, you can tell me anything I promise I'll still stay. I mean unless you're a criminal and you're gonna kill me.” You joke. Moving closer to him you prepare yourself a bit for whatever he would say.  “So what's up?”

He takes a breath, “I like you y/n -san.... and I'm really sorry if you don’t like me after this or if this makes anything awkward or if I made you uncomfortable in any way. I've liked you since high school and I was too scared to say anything because I thought you liked another guy--”

“--I swear even when we were younger there was something about you that just made everyone like you. You were so nice, friendly to everyone, helpful, beautiful, and so much more. You’re captivating to me… and I’m trying to use whatever’s left of this liquid courage to get this off my chest and I think I’m ready for whatever might come next.” 

Your mouth parts slightly from shock because of what he said but it slowly, turns into a huge grin.   

“Hajime, I don't know what to say…” you cut him off before he could say anything, 

“Because I like you too, and I have for such a long time.”

He lifts up his head with hope and a slight disbelief in his eyes, “You do..? You did..?!’’

“Yes..” you say with a small chuckle and a smile plastered across your face. You walk even closer until you're both mere inches away from each other. You take a relieved sigh and make eye contact with him. You wrap your arms around his neck and draw him in for a hug. He places his arms delicately around your waist hugging you back.

He slowly pulls away and cups your face ever so tenderly, pulling you in so that your lips are merely ghosting the others; and he gently kisses you. You felt as if that you were floating on clouds. His lips were so soft and warm it felt so surreal.

You both pull away and he says with a smile, “I've waited and wanted for so long to do that.”

You couldn't believe that everything that happened, actually happened. It felt like a scenario that you would only be able to play in your head. But it was all real and it was all happening. It felt like a dream, and if this were a scene in some cute drama there would have been hearts floating around your head right now, you felt lovestruck.

 Cause it’s been a while, since i’ve thought about the good things, all the bright light things all the good times that we had! It’s been a while, since I made u smile! 

You finally reach your apartment hand-in-hand, sitting down on the couch as soon as you enter. The night was filled with more conversations, laughter and just overall good times. Homework forgotten and disregarded, you let yourself go and have fun. Surprisingly everything felt like it just fell into place. 

You looked at him and maybe it was the alcohol but he was pretty sure he saw stars in your eyes. 

“I can't believe after all this time you're finally and actually mine.” you say.

Whatever magic or fate intertwined and lined you up to this exact moment you just knew that you were forever grateful.

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression Ep 49 - Ioka Kazuto's New Years Eve tattoo problem.

K: Hi, this is Dir en grey's Kaoru with this week's episode of The Freedom of Expression. Joe san, Tasai san, welcome again this week.

T: What is the celebratory sake for?

K: Well, this is our first recording of the new year..

J: Yes

T: Happy New Year

J: Happy New Year. By the time this is broadcast it will already be well into January though.

K: Yes, so..for good luck.

J: Ah, that would be welcome....but Im not gonna drink it.

K: Why?

J: Um, I've said this a few times before, but my resolution for 2021 is to not go so crazy when drinking alcohol, to not get too carried away.

T: Hahaha

J: I've already decided on it.

K: Don't you always say that?

J: No, no, no. Um, recently...was it on the 27th? After the live broadcast? I left afterwards with Tasai.

T: Oh, yeah.

J: We left together, we got a taxi. Then when I arrived home, it was about 2am, right? When I tried to get in my house, I didn't have my keys.

T, K: Eh?!

T: Really??

J: I didn't have my keys..what could I do? I think i actually left them somewhere before i arrived here, and I hadn't been drinking before that. But in the end, I went to a hotel in my neighborhood...like, please let me stay here, I'll pay so please let me stay. So, I woke up the next day and called the real estate agent to ask if they had a spare key..they didn't. They said they'd given all the keys to me. So, I called around a few other places, and by about lunch time I managed to get hold of a key. But I had to go and do a live radio broadcast in this kind of messed up state, so..

T: Eh?!

J: Well, I mean, it wasn't the fault of alcohol this time, but I have lost my pocket wifi before while I was drunk, and my glasses...and Im constantly telling dirty jokes while drunk...so this year..., well, I will drink alcohol, but Im not gonna go wild.

T: Hahaha

K: Thats impossible!

J, T: Hahaha

Kami: Joe san, Joe san...

J: Oh, Kami? What is it? Kami's here.

Kami: Joe, you've become a boring guy.

J, T: Hahaha

Kami: You're trying to play it safe.

J: No, no, no. Can I really carry on? Drinking and going crazy this year too?

Kami: You need to be free. Please don't hold yourself back.

J: Haha 

T: When we were going home in the taxi, you said, 'I think I've messed up'...

J: I was doing a bit of self-reflecting.

T: Your true voice slipped out.

J: I think it did.

K: What? Why, what happened again?

T: Yeah, what was it again?

J: Well, I think it was me just going a bit wild. It felt like I got carried away.

T: You felt that in yourself?

J: Well, I do, don't I? When I drink alcohol?

K: Well, yeah.

J: Kaoru, we've done a lot of events together, right?

K: Yeah, most of the time I'm like, 'Joe, calm down!'

J: And Im supposed to be the moderator!

T: You change places!

J: Right!

K: Also, he had to read out things written in Katakana and stuff, but he couldn't read the difficult words*1

J: There are a few reasons for that. After I've had a drink, I can't read difficult kanji, and also I have bad eyesight. Katakana has loads of spaces in it, right?

T: Maybe we should have let Tasai do it.

T: Yeah, I should have done the reading.

J: Kanji just turns into clumps.

K: Ok, well, today...Tasai, could you get us started?

T: Yes, this is about the big match on last New Years Eve. Its boxing news. It was the WBO super flyweight title match between Ioka Kazuto and Tanaka Kōsei. Ioka won the match, but this news deals with a slightly different aspect. Ioka's tattoos were visible during the match. The boxing commission have said this is a violation of the rules, and are considering imposing a penalty. Questions have been arising on social media like, 'Isn't this a mistake?', and, 'What about individual freedom?' Did you watch the match, Kaoru?

K: No, I didn't, but I saw it on the news.

T: Yeah. And, Ioka had actually covered his tattoos with foundation to hide them before getting in the ring, but sweating made the foundation come off.

J: I see.

T: So, its become a bit of a talking point, what to think about this.

K: This isn't the first time he's done this, right? He covered his tattoos before in other fights?

T: Yeah, to stop the foundation coming off he...

K: But foundation?...can you really hide them with foundation?

J: Haha, yeah, maybe not. They are too solid. So, he went ino the ring without foundation this time?

T: No, he had it on, but it came off with sweat.

J: Wouldn't that happen anyway?

K: If it did, that means its come off everytime up to now.

J: Right? Its not like its only come off this time. Its hard to understands why the JBC are raising this problem only now?

T: Well, its in the rules. The rules for matches are...in the rulebook, Match management section 4, conditions for boxers article 86, it says for things that make spectators feel uncomfortable, such as tattoos...if a boxer has tattoos, they must not appear in the ring.

J: Oh, thats written?

T: Yes, thats written in the rules. There have been cases in the past of boxers getting tattoos surgically removed in order to be able to compete in the ring.

J: Im not sure about this. Feeling uncomfortable just by seeing a tattoo...?

K: Regular people do though, don't they?

J: Do they?

K: Not people like us here, regular people are different.

J: Haha, of course.

K: But its Japanese people...foreigners have seen tattoos as pretty normal for quite a long time.

J: Right. Their police even have tattoos.

K: But we havn't got there in Japan yet. They are still thought of as scary. Even me, if I see someone with tattoos walk in, I don't say anything to them, but I do notice and look at them if they have tattoos.

J: Well..

K: You look though, right?

J: Well, I would think 'oh, they have tattoos'.

K: Yeh, but you would say ????*2

J: Well...

K: You would!

J: Would I? But...this is boxing, right? The spectators have come to watch people hitting each other.

K: Well, yeah, thats right.

J: For example, if a kabuki actor suddenly revealed tattoos all over their body, I have a feeling it wouldn't go down well with people who are going to see traditional arts, but if they are going to see people punching each other, would they be that bothered about tattoos?

K: Its because the rules havn't changed since a long time ago.

J: Yeah. Hmm, Im not sure about this. What's it like overseas?

T: Its totally fine overseas.

J: Its ok, right?

K: They don't mind if foreigners have them.

J: Ah, foreign boxers with tattoos are allowed to fight in Japan?

T: Yes.

K: So I think this is good. It could change how we do things *3

J: Yeah, it creates a stir, because there are quite a lot of people who know about this old rule. Um, even at events and stuff (I MC at a lot of events), some guests are instructed to wear long sleeeves when they attend. This is what Japan is like with tattoos.

T: But I think I read somwhere that the NBA also has the rule to cover tattoos. Like, they will wear armbands and stuff to cover them.

K: Even in baseball, the Giants have banned facial hair.

J: Have they?

T: The Giants have an unwritten code, let me think who had a beard....do you remember Ogasawara Michihiro/Gatz?

J: Oh yeah, the left handed player?

T: Yeah, when he joined the Giants he shaved it all off etc. That type of thing still happens, even now. Have a look next time the Giants play, none of them have facial hair.

J: I don't think foreign players will like these rules that Japanese have. This seems like its against the Constitution. It really does.

Kami: Its discrimination, right?

J: Yes, I agree.

Kami: Nishinari people are sensitive to discrimination.

J: Yeah, I mean, if they are gonna have this rule, they should ban tattoos for everyone in boxing, but to say its ok for foreign boxers but not Japanese ones.. its a bit...

Kami: Its unconstitutional. Its discrimination.

J: Yeh, I think its discrimination. But looking at some of the comments, some say that although its written in the rules, it can't be helped these days.

Kami: Its not fair though, letting Ioka get this incredible win, and then afterwards saying, actually, no.

T: Yes, thats right.

Kami: When I was younger I won at pachinko..

J: Haha, all of a sudden..

Kami: I had quite a babyface, and would get mistaken for being underage. They never said anything to me when I lost...

T: But when you handed in your tickets they told you no because you're underage?

Kami: Yeah, yeah. Even though they said nothing to me when I was losing. Its like they come to stop you after you start winning.

T: I see.

Kami: They will take all the benefits, but when it starts to get unfavorable...I sense that unfairness.

T: Ah, yeh. Well, its true that the boxing commission already knew that Ioka had tattoos. And they asked him to take part.

J: Yeah. Its not like he got the tattoos right before this match.

T: Thats right. Incidentally, he got this particular tattoo in America in 2018, September, to show resovle and determination for his comeback fight. And this time, he has also added his son's name as if to say 'lets fight together'.

J: Oh, thats a nice meaning....Sue them!

T: Sue them?

J: Yes, Tokyo Sports should sue them.

T: Why just us? haha. We should together.

J: ???*4

K: I wonder how this will turn out though.

J: Yeah. Is Ioka following the boxing commission then?

T: He is still waiting to see what they decide.

J: Ah, ok.

T: He is still waiting for their judgment.

J: So like, it will depend on the level of punishment he gets.

K: They'll just say its the rules.

T: In that case, he might just go to America, if he can't fight any matches in Japan.

J: Well, yeah.

T: I think this would be a bigger problem if it happened outside the ring. But its happened within the ring. Its still a fact that tattoos are seen as scary in this culture.

K: It seems so to me, speaking as a person who has tattoos.

J: Thats what you have felt from experience?　Exactly.

K: But you could say that he knew this when he got the tattoos. He knew they would tell him to stop.

T: Like, boxers definitely understand this.

K: He knows it, but he is still appearing in the ring, so if he has determination and resolve, its great. If he doesn't, its no surprise if he gets complaints.

J, T: I see.

J: Well, considering he did try to hide it, but the covering just came off, I wonder what will happen. Its not like he can wear clothes over it, right?

K: He could have put tape on it.

J: Oh, right, you can hide it like that too?

T: Yeah, there might be something like skin coloured tape.

J: Kami, can we have a last word from you on this?

Kami: Well, whatever the rules, making them only apply to Japanese is strange, right?

J: Well, yes, thats true. We'll have to keep a look out for what happens with this from now on.

K: Well, yeh.

T: To see how it develops, yeh.

K: Yeah. Kami seemed a bit lacking in vitality today, didn't he?

J: Yeah, he seems down. Kami, did something happen to you at new year time?

Kami: No, no, Im fine! Don't I sound it?

K: You sound like you are lacking a bit of punch.

J: With it being boxing, you'd expect him to have more 'punch'.

K: He just seemed a bit...regular.

J: Yeah.

Kami: Regular? haha.

K: He's laughing, haha.

T, J: Haha

J: The staff are making me laugh.

K: Ok, shall we finish here for today?

J: Yes

K: Ok, please subscribe. Thank you very much.

*1, 3 Not sure this is right.

*2, 4 Couldn't make out

Back to top page

[troop52]

do u !!! have any character theme songs for the troop boys? Like any songs you think really fits them (and why u think it fits)?

THATS A GREAT QUESTION!!

Before I get into it Im going to plug this collaborative Troop Playlist on Spotify, feel free to add onto it!! Continuing with my picks

I think a lot of the songs I associate with The Troop in general are just because I happened to listen to them around the same time I got into the book in the first place (So they could only be tangentially related BUT only if you squint hard) Example: Drunk by The Living Tombstone, cant really tie it into the story but in my mind its linked Some better, more fitting songs under the cut (Side note its LONGGG IM SORRY... Also its all YouTube links because some of these arent on Spotify :'^()

Disclaimer -Like 95% of my choices arent really a "These lyrics match up exactly 1 to 1" but more of an overall "the vibe/general idea its trying to capture lines up" type thing. If that makes sense.

Its Alright by Jack Stauber: Kind of self explanatory, I think its a perfect song for these guys. From "It's alright, I'm here, Everything's alright, Feels weird but calm, I wanna hear It's alright" to the whole sound of it- its all great. Equal parts distressing and sad with an almost eerie calmness to it. Despite it all theyre gonna be alright, right?

The Second Little Piggy by Worthikids: Another one that I think is sort of self explanatory- at least with the chorus. "If my brain turns to mush, If the shit hits the fan, Will you be my friend?" Kind of the falling apart of everything, specifically their relationships, in light of the incident.

Poor George by James Supercave: Another case of "listened to at the same time I read the book" BUT I was actually making a Troop PMV script with that song. I never finished it but maybe Ill revisit it... just for you

Cold Summer by Le Matos ft Computer Magic: I dont even think this takes place in the summer but the VIBES and also it came from Summer of 84, which is another good piece of murder boy media.

Treehouse by Alex G ft Emily Yacina: This is a Eef and Max type of song because they are bffs and thats final. Basic song because Im not creative, but I think its a nice heart to heart theyd have (with Eef doing the talking)

Fifteen Minuets by Nick Krol: On the flipside heres a song that goes with Eef and Maxs friendship fracturing, once again more from Eefs side than Maxs. THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTINGGG

As far as songs for the boys as individuals hmmm thats a good one that I havent thought about as much...

MAX + The Ghosts by The Real Tuesday Weld: That survivors guilt... lyrics arent like a perfect match but I think it gets that sort of hollow feeling across. Hes haunted man... + Final Girl by Electric Youth: Ok its a little funny because har har Final Girl Trope but I mean HE IS ONE. ANd dont look at me its a nice song- "Others were gone, and you kept going on, You know they never really noticed, you were always different, One by one, They're all done, And you're the last one standing" + Going Grazy by Lonesome Wyatt and the Holy Spooks: HONESTLY this could go for all the characters but Im tagging it onto Max because hes the one who has to deal with the aftermath of losing everyone (sorry survivors guilt Max again </3) "Everyone's saying my mind is unsound, 'Cause I always see you when you aren't around" "They're gonna wrap me in a jacket of white, And lock me away in a room without light" is what cements it as a Max song for me

EEF + The Existential Threat by Sparks: Once again starting sad, I link this one specifically to his paranoia about the worms- especially with lines like "Can't they see the existential threat is on its way". Kind of exasperated no one else can see the danger (he thinks) hes in. + Wrecking Ball by Mother Mother: I know I know its basic but I cant help it!!! Eef anger issues arc we are shaking hands me too + Haunted by Laura Les: Eef struggles with people seeing him as "just like his father" and I think we can get some good angst out of this track if we keep that in mind. Especially the back half of the song with lyrics like "Do you think I'm frightening?" and "Mirrors shatter when I'm passing, broken glass and crashing" since he is just a reflection of his dad (to others at least). Also song good.

KENT + Goodbye Mr A by The Hoosiers: Mfw the disillusionment with authority sets in. I think the vibe fits when he had that little epiphany about how adults are fucked- not perfect but it gets the idea across me thinks. + I'm Gonna Win by Rob Cantor: Ties into his need to "win" aka be the best at everything, be in charge, all that jazz! Hell do whatever it takes to be successful, even if it hurts. That was a little emo + Toba the Tura by Forgive Durden ft Chris Conley: Not to be emo again but "They say you're gifted, well I just see a scared kid. They must have flipped it, your skills are latent. O, you snuffed the glow. Replaced it with coals. Threw away the throne... This mess that you've made, it's a six-foot grave. It's a home for your lonesome bones that remain. We'll disappear, but you'll stay here to rot" AND SO ON AND SO FOURTH representing his fall after it was revealed he was sick. He was referred to as "the uncrowned king" and was on top of the world but then POOF that all crumbled and it was made out that he basically deserved what happened to him. It would be fun to make a pmv of him with this song (Simplifying my thoughts a bit because Ive already written a LOT)

NEWT + I Earn My Life by Lemon Demon: Ok a little Kentcore but Im actually having a hard time coming up with songs for Newton so here we are, they can share. Newt existential crisis moment time I guess + Know How by The Crane Wives: POV Newt struggles with going through with the plans he makes to keep everyone safe (stopping Max from touching Kent, going back into the cabin, etc) "I am not brave, I am not brave, I keep my focus on what is safe, You drew a line, made up your mind, And now I'm struggling to realize" And also maybe struggling with his place in the group and as a person in general- all that living through his cousin thing. "I gotta wrap my head around, What my heart is telling me, I've been trying to drown it out, Just because I know what I am, I am supposed to do now, Doesn't mean I know, Doesn't mean I know how" + On The Outside by Oingo Boingo: Idk man. Hes on the outside lookin in!! Loner nerd!! Its ok though, we still love him

SHEL + Bad Blood by Creature Feature: The lyrics speak for themselves: "I can guarantee I will do evil things, The only way that you can stop me now, Is if you put me in the ground, Somewhere I'll never be found" + Frontier Psychologist by The Avalanches: Hinges on the fact that the principal or whoever was like "Your sons a freak" and Shels mom was like "HES PERFECTLY FINE" while Shelley was like dismembering an animal or something + Johnny by American Murder Song: The songs good but theres this ONE LYRIC that sucks so the link provided is an edited version and also a lovely Warriors oc video I think you should all enjoy and support <3 Anyway Shel would be Johnny I could see this song being a scene in the book. Field trip to Shels house and they find his murder garden

If anyone wants more for Im not opposed to making another post :^)

[intheweedsx]

Chapter 2: The MET Gala

Chapter 2: The Met Gala 

The night before the MET Gala Calvin was supposed to arrive tom after his  3 month tour and she couldn’t be more excited

“honey im here” shouted Calvin from downstairs

Taylor quickly applied her lipstick and looked in the mirror as she just wore a black lace bra and panties. She decided to slip on a see through shirt and she headed down stairs to greet Calvin. 

Taylor ran to Calvin and embraced him in a longing hug. It felt like forever since they had seen each granted it had been three months. 

“hey babe” taylor said 

“hey I’ve missed you” Calvin said groggily as he yawned 

“hey love I’m going to go to bed early I’m so exhausted after the fourteen hour flight. 

“yea sure babe. The bed is already made and if there is anything you need I’ll be down here”

“hey Calvin do you want me to unpack your things so you don’t have to do it in the morning”

“yea sure thank you so much”

Taylor took his 2 suitcases and started to unzip them when a pair of dark purple panties fell out. They seemed to have fallen out of Calvin’s suit along with an empty condom wrapper. 

Taylor’s heart shattered as she knew that Calvin had cheated in the past but that was in the beginning of their relationship and she had thought they had worked it out and he promised her wouldn’t do it anymore. Taylor started tearing up knowing that their relationship was done. Taylor knew she couldn’t let him keep cheating on me not when I wanted to start a family with him. 

“calvin can you come here” taylor said wearily 

Calvin slowly came down the stair as he had just gotten out of bed

“can you explain this” as she held the panties and condom up 

“you swore you wouldn’t cheat on me anymore and this is what you bring home. The filth of your mistress. I can’t believe you Calvin I really trusted you. And the worse part is she definitely  wasn’t the only woman you fucked on your 3 month tour. We are done. Please get your shit out of here”

“Babe I promise it won’t do it again I was just so desperate for some action after not being with you for months”

Taylor looked like she was going to explode 

“How dare you blame my lack of presence for you cheating. I did not have the urge to cheat while you were gone even though I missed physical contact so much I sucked it up because I knew how import this relationship was to me and how I could never hurt you like that. But it seems it was quite easy for you to throw what we had all to waste. Please get of this house right now”

Calvin turned around and headed up the stairs to gather his things because he knew that the relationship was over and there was no going back. 

Calvin came back down with his stuff packed 

“she was better than you anyway” Calvin said as he left slamming the door. 

Taylor broke down crying knowing she would have to tell her family and the whole world that yet again she could not make a relationship work. 

All of a sudden Taylor heard her phone buzzing. She went to go check who was texting her and it was Joe. She was confused as to why he was texting her cause she hasn’t  spoken to him since the night after she got black out drunk

“hey Taylor I know we haven’t spoken in a while but I was wondering if you were going to the MET. I kinda assumed because you are a high profile celeb and all that fancy stuff. Anyway get back to me when you xo”

“hi Joe I am going hope to see you there :)”

Well that was strange she thought but alas its time to wallow with some well deserved chocolate ice cream. 

-The day of the MET Gala- 

“Hey Tree, is it really necessary that I go to the MET Gala especially with all the Calvin stuff”

The news had not broke yet about Calvin and Taylor ending their relationship but Taylor was still very upset about the breakup and needed time. 

“Taylor everyone already knows that you are going you need to make an appearance at least for an hour”

“ok ill see you then bye”

A few hours passed by and it was already time to get ready. 

Taylor went through her closet and found the silver robot looking dress that she was given to wear. When she slipped it on Taylor realized it wasn’t as pretty as she remember but it has to do because there is nothing else I could wear. She freshened up her red lipstick and called John to pick me up. 

Once Taylor arrived at the MET gala she was bombarded with tons of paparazzi asking “where is calvin” “will he be coming later” Taylor didn’t know what to say so she just shrugged off the questions. Even if we were together Taylor doubted  hhe would want to come anyway he always thinks he is too good for these frivolous events. 

Taylor made my way into the main dining hall where she saw Gigi and Karlie

 “Hey guys how are you”

“we are pretty good” they chimed in while they seemed to be looking in the other direction 

“guyyyss what are you looking at” Taylor trying to follow their gaze 

“remember that guy from the bar back in April look he is here, I may go say hi” Selena said as she started walking towards him 

Taylor had not told her friends that she had kept in brief contact with Joe or that she may have cheated on Calvin with Joe, that was not certain but she was pretty sure she did. Taylor started to walk over behind Karlie and Sel

“hey Joe” Selena drunkly shouted

Joe looked up confused and then look relieved once he spotted Taylor hiding behind Sel and Karlie

“Hey guys I haven’t seen you guys in forever how are you”

The three girls nodded in unison saying they were good 

The group chatted for a few minutes and then Taylor was interrupted by a tall handsome man 

“hey Taylor” a British accent said 

Taylor looked up and noticed it was Tom 

Taylor and Tom had met a few days before the MET Gala and had hit it off. Taylor found him incredibly charming and really handsome. 

“heyy tom, do you want to go sit down over there”

“bye Joe it was nice seeing you again”

Joe saw Taylor walk away with another man which pained him but he knew that to Taylor Joe will always be the man she met in the bar and nothing more. 

Tom snaked him arm around Taylor’s waist which caused Taylor’s stomach to fill with butterflies. As they approached the table Tom pulled out the chair and Taylor graciously sat down. 

“so tom how have you been since we last say each other” 

“great I have been a bit busy with casting for the upcoming marvel movie but other than that it has been great to be in the states”

“hey tom let’s go dance no one else is dancing right now”

Taylor and tom started dancing and soon enough more people joined them on the dance floor 

Joe saw Tom and Taylor dance from the other side of the room and was instantly jealous of the beautiful pair

Taylor looked into Tom’s eyes and then Tom twirled her around and brought her back closer to him almost hugging her then he spun her out again. Taylor was having the time of her life dancing away the thought of Calvin. 

However, Taylor noticed that everyone was looking that and then she realized that the general public still thought she was with Calvin. 

“hey Tom, I’m going to go to the bathroom to freshen up okay?”

“ya that fine meet me back here when you are done” tom said as he winked as her which brought Taylor to a smile. 

Taylor started to rush to the bathroom because she did not want anyone to ask her any questions as to why she was dancing so feverishly with Tom 

Joe saw Taylor running to the bathroom and he thought something was wrong and he followed her 

When Taylor got to the bathroom she locked the door and started to break down crying because with all the events of the last 24 hours she was just done with being the center of everything and she needed a break from everything. All of a sudden to heard a knock at the door 

“hold on I’ll be right out” Taylor shouted 

“hey tay it’s Joe are you are okay?” Joe asks softly 

Taylor rolls her eyes thinking why is following her she just needs to be alone 

“hey Joe do you mind leaving me alone for a bit”

“are you sure you are okay love”

Taylor thought it might not be bad to have some company and she opened the door and let Joe in

“hey Joe” Taylor said while wiping away the tears on her cheek

Joe looked at Taylor sympathetically and brushed his thumb on her cheek hoping to wipe away the tears 

“thank you” taylor said wearily and she held back her tears 

“love whats wrong” 

“I just can’t do it anymore, yesterday I broke up with Calvin because I found out he was cheating and today I’m dancing with Tom hoping to put yesterday behind me but all the memories came flooding back when we were dancing and I just can’t do it anymore Joe” Taylor said while crying into his shoulder

Joe started to rub Taylors back and tell her that everything was going to be okay that she didn’t have to worry

Taylor then realized that she had been in the bathroom for a while and that Tom will probably be worried 

“Joe I’m going to need to leave Tom is probably worried about me” Taylor said as she looked into the mirror wiping away the tears 

Joe let her go and Taylor looked around and mouthed thank you 

Taylor knew in that moment that Joe was going to be a very special person in her life that she could hopefully count on in him in the future 

Taylor and Tom danced the night away and later that night left together and went to Taylor’s home in new york 

Tom and Taylor snuck in through the back entrance 

“Tom stop it” Taylor giggled as tom started kissing the back of Taylor’s neck 

“do you really want me to stop” as tom twirled Taylor so she was facing tom 

Taylor shook her head no and tom leaned in to kiss her 

Soon enough Taylor’s dress was on the floor and she was left in just her black panties and push up bra. Tom similarly only had his pants on while showing off his set of abs. 

“hey tom do you want to go upstairs” as Taylor smirked 

Tom smiled and hoisted Taylor up so she was straddling him while he was carrying her up the stairs. 

When he got to the top of the stairs he found the bedroom and laid Taylor down on her bed

Tom quickly slid his pants off and he was left in just his boxers with his throbbing member showing

Tom started to climb on the bed and he started leaving trails of kisses from Taylor’s thighs all the way up to her breasts

Tom unclasped Taylor’s lace bra and started to leave kisses around her next and eventually on her breasts

Taylor was getting impatient and started to reach down for tom’s boxers when he stopped her and pinned her hands above her head

Tom made his way down to Taylor’s hips and slowly started to take off her black lace panties. He slid his fingers into taylor and started thrusting which elicited several moans from taylor. At that point taylor was getting impatient and just wanted Tom inside of her 

Tom saw that taylor was getting impatient and he took his throbbing length and slowly inserted it into taylor to which taylor let out a moan. Tom slowly thrusted himself in and out of taylor having her feel every inch of him

towards the end when both of them were reaching their climax tom lifted Taylor’s leg up and started to thrust in and out faster and faster until both of them came together 

Both tom and taylor laid on on top of each other for five minutes before they could regain themselves. 

“thanks tom” taylor whispered gratefully as that was some of the best sex she has had in a while 

“welcome love” tom added 

After an hour of cuddling Tom started to redress himself as he had to leave because he had an early day tomorrow 

“bye love call me whenever you are free” tom added 

“bye bye see you later” taylor said as tom left her bedroom and she heard him leave through the back door 

Taylor did not have a problem with tom leaving because usually when she has a one night type stand like this she doesn’t expect anyone to stay over

After a few minutes taylor slowly fell asleep. 

[randomxreaders]

The Secret:2

TW: Cussing,Mentions of Surgery

!NOT MY GIF!

Sorry if there are any spelling errors I just threw this together :)

“You guys are married?” John B looked at you questionably. “Wait so if you guys are married when did it happen a-and how did it happen an-and why did it-” “Hey, your rambling” John B said, cutting off Sarah. Y/N took a sighed and looked at JJ who was looking at her with a guilty smirk. “We’ll let you all talk.” Meredith said nudging Derek. “Ok long story short I was in Vegas for a medical conference for school and my best friend, Amelia was going through just getting a brain tumor removed and a divorce. I was also going through some stuff. But then i saw JJ and we were both black out drunk and thought it would be a good idea to get married.” Y/N rambled out. “What were you going through?” Pope asked, concerned, everyone looked at you. “Oh, um it was nothing.” 

“Ok, but why are you still married.” Kie questioned. “Because our annulment was denied.”JJ stated. “But why didn't you tell us dude.” John B asked. “I was just trying to process it all, and we didn't want to get a divorce and have to explain if we ever got married to someone else.” “Ok this all kind of makes sense.” Sarah said, still in shock. “So will you take care of m-” JJ got cut off by Y/N’s pager “Shit” Y/N mumbled “I’ll be back in a little bit we’ll talk later!” Y/N yelled running out of the room. 

“Y/N she broke her arm and Torres is in surgery” Meredith sobbed “Hey, hey it’s ok Mer, she’s gonna be fine it looks like a clean break anyways, does Derek know?” The surgeon questioned “Yeah,he knows he’s on his way down” “Ok, Hey ZoZo Auntie/Uncle Y/N is gonna get you all fixed up.” You smiled at Zola.You had known her ever since Derek and Mer had adopted her, and would watch her whenever needed. “Alright Zo we’re gonna go take some X-ray’s ok.” Zola sniffled and looked at you “ok” she whispered out. 

                                                                    After the X-rays

“Ok Zo im gonna get you some more medicine for the pain and then we're gonna put you in a cast for two weeks then you get a splint for a week ok?” “Ok, can my cast be purple.” Zo asked “Of course it can, do you want light purple or dark purple?” “Umm,light purple.” Zola said funny with the pain meds starting to kick in. Y/N let out a low laugh “Ok, light purple it is.” Putting on the cast was easy besides for when Zola would make you laugh from her being loopy. “Ok Zo I’m gonna go get your Mom and Dad ok.” “Yay,don’t tell them what color my cast is. I want to show them!” Zola slightly shouted “You got it Zo, ok i’ll be back in a minute.” You laughed out. 

You walked to the waiting room where Meredith and Derek had to wait. “Hey Zo-” “Is she ok” Derek and Mer asked at the same time. “She is perfectly fine guys a little loopy from the pain meds but other than that she's fine, she's going to be in a cast for two weeks then she is going to have a splint for a week after that.” “Ok, that's good” Derek sighed. “C’mon guys she's waiting to see you.” You guided them to the room Zola was in “Hey Zo look who's with me.” “Hey Mommy, Daddy look at my cast, it's purple!” Zola hollered exited. The couple laughed and smiled happily that Zola was doing fine. Ok i’ll go get her discharge papers but I want to see her in two weeks Y/N said while signing Zola’s cast while writing ‘Get better soon ZoZo! Love your favorite person- Y/N’ Right as you finished signing Amelia walked in “Hey Zola how are you doing!” She asked the mini Shepherd “Im good auntie Amelia Y/N fixed me all up.” “Oh I bet they did, ok I gotta go I’ll see you in a little bit ok!” Amelia said enthusiastically. “I’m gonna go to ZoZo I’ll come check back in on you ok.” 

You and Amelia walked out of the room “So what's this I hear about a secret husband?” Amelia questioned. “It’s not that big of a deal we accidentally got married in vegas a few years ago.”

“Well you you guys gonna get back together or get a divorce or something” 

“I don’t know ‘Meil I mean I still love him and all but I don’t know.” Y/N sighed “Just sleep on it, don't make a major decision after you haven't slept in two day also make sure you don’t have a brain tumor.” Amelia joked. Y/N laughed “Ok, then will you give me a head CT.” Y/N joked back. “Yep first thing in the morning” “Ok thank you and goodbye I will see you tomorrow after my morning rounds” Y/N said walking off “Get some sleep, i’ll see you tomorrow,Love you!” Amelia shouted “Love you too ‘Meil!” You hollard back. 

                                                           Back in JJ’s room

“Alright JJ we’re going to have you stay overnight to monitor you just in case, this will be your overnight nurse, nurse John. I’ll see you in the morning.” “Night Y/N/N” “Goodnight JJ”

Right when you got home you kicked off your shoes and fell asleep but not before thinking “What the hell am I going to do?”

Hope you like it and Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy Winter Solstice, Happy Las Posadas, Happy Diwali, and what ever holiday you celebrate this time of year I will not be updating this story until Jan.10 at the latest! (I will be making a part 3) Have a good day!

[amjustagirl]

You’ve said a few times that you really feel for oikawa and iwa in Astrophile but DUDE I just cannot feel bad for them 😭 not only with the way oikawa acted in all that, but like they really had their whole lives to figure out their feelings for each other and they waited until the week before reader’s wedding to do it?? waited until some poor girl got dragged into it smh. and also oikawa inviting himself over to reader’s sister’s apartment where she was hiding, because obviously she didn’t want to see him again, even if it was to apologize like….bro send a text she doesn’t want to see you lmao. And then with how they were acting about the wedding invitations in Broken Compass like harassing this poor girl, bro WHO would want to go to the wedding of your ex and the man he emotionally cheated on you with ugh. but anyway it really is one of my favorite haikyuu fics, it like permanently altered the way I see iwa, I think about it all the time 😭

okok so for starters (in case anyone doesn't know what im referring to), the fic being referred to here is Astrophile and it's q angsty ok. and before i get down to my response - ahhh anon ty for dropping by to give me your thoughts on my fics. i'm always humbled and grateful whenever anyone even bothers spending their time and thought on my fic babies and to analyse it??? <3

now, first off let me defend my darling iwa just a teensy, tiny bit. to be fair to him, he really never emotionally cheated on the reader because the night oikawa confessed his feelings to him, my headcanon is that iwa definitely turned him down and told him that it really isn't the time and place for them to work anything out (one week before his wedding to the poor reader!!), hence why oikawa got injured cos he was drunk and flailing about. also to his credit, iwa did intend on going ahead with the wedding to the reader and it was the reader who decided against it (i mean, girl, duh). plus in broken compass, i think oikawa kinda got into his ear abt making sure the reader's okay cos she went completely radio silence when previously, they were fine when they bump into each other at matches and i think iwa being the protective, caring iwa that we all know just wanted to make sure the reader was okay - he did love her v much too, after all. so okay, i personally don't think iwa is the bad guy in this, but i love hearing your interpretation anw.

oikawa - i must admit, i never intended on making him the villain of the story because i don't actually write villains, not really (except maybe in dream catcher HAHA) and i just see him as a flawed character who's always grasping for what his heart desires - professional success, and it's easy to translate that to his approach towards romance as well. but he also suffers a lot of guilt methinks, especially because iwa truly does love the reader so so much that it clouds his logic and as much as i feel for the reader, i also emphatize deeply with him. of course he shouldn't have harassed the reader with his stupid wedding invites and of course he shouldn't have even tracked her down to apologise but...sometimes we do stupid things, and in his case, i'm more forgiving because it's done not out of malice, but guilt.

still though. again, i'm so, so humbled that you've thought this much about my interpretation of the characters that i cld scream and pls don't take me disagreeing somewhat w you as a condemnation - i guess as a former lit student, ive never believed that the writer's intention is king, and it's really up to the individual reader to form their own interpretation of the story so!!! all this to say - thank you again for sharing your thoughts and words with me, i treasure them so very, very much :)

[sharkb0yinthewat3r]

What was coming out like for you?

For years I was closeted and i really didn’t want to do it. I go back and forth between whether or not I thought it was unnecessary or I told myself it was unnecessary so I wouldn’t have to do it. It was probably a little bit of both.

I knew for a while that at the very least my mom knew since she was the only one dropping hints. But if she did so did everybody else. After I was like truly accepting of myself, I really did buy into the narrative that i didn’t need to do it. On one hand I felt like everyone in my family already knew so there was no need to inform them, there was no need to bring it up out of nowhere unprompted, and it’s just ridiculous that that’s something anyone has to do. I’m more than my sexuality and straight people don’t have to come out.

Anyway this ended up being a really long post feel free to read all of it, but the main takeaway is that coming out was scary. Even when I knew nothing big was going to come of it, there’s just like this anxiety I had and I think it’s normal. Im lucky to live a life where I can be myself freely without having to be concerned about repercussions. I would say me coming out to my friends/just not hiding who I was from them was a great experience. My cousins were so great. My mom and my sister, I guess I wish that those had gone better which is crazy to me because they had known the longest and had so long to prepare and just didn’t have ideal reactions (far from awful but it was kinda just like uhhh ok?) and then my dads is probably my favorite bc that’s how it should be for everyone. It was ultimately very freeing for me but it was also like very uncomfortable for me.

My coming out happened in 4 phases:

1. College freshman year: i was struggling with my sexuality after I got my first crush and wasn’t sure whether or not people would accept me and eventually I told one friend that I lived with and he never treated me differently, I think I told three other friends that were girls, but overall it was extremely difficult to communicate for me. I would say that this was a time in which I was still closeted.

2. I now work on accepting myself and don’t really talk about it with people unless it comes up for the next three years. I’m now in my fourth year of college and join an org where I’m placed on a committee that’s essentially 60% gay males 40% straight males (and girls). My goal when joining was just to be open and let people get to know me. I was still middle ish of the road and sorta wanted to be perceived as straight. I think people just kind of started to assume I was gay and it was like “oh I don’t have to think about telling anyone anything or acting a certain way. I can just be myself” and I kinda just let loose and as we started hanging out and going to parties together I was able to open up and be myself judgement free and it was just so much fun and that’s when I like TRULY accepted myself and I was like life should be like this all the time. I can’t believe I haven’t been doing this. This was more of like a me coming out to myself than anything else and showing myself how enjoyable life can be when you don’t bottle yourself up.

3. Same year (after my first semester) Even though I was very open with my friends at school, this was my first time home for a ���long break’ and I wasn’t as open with my family. Me and my two female cousins went out for a day together in the city and then ended up at a bar where they were talking about the kind of guys they were into and my one cousin mentions that she’s into older guys and I didn’t say anything and then our other cousin went to the bathroom and I was like btw I’m gay and I only wanted to preface that bc when u said u were into older guys I was like legit same I know exactly what you mean. My other cousin came back from the bathroom and then we laughed about it, but they were the sweetest and most supportive I could’ve wanted. I don’t think I’d ever felt as close with them as I did in that moment. They asked if anyone else knew and I was like well my friends but that’s it and they said they wouldn’t tell anyone and I thanked them.

A few nights later I met my sister out at a bar for her birthday in the city. I was hanging out with her friends (who I knew just not on a real personal level) because she was dancing and making out with some guy. This is actually kinda funny. It was winter and the bar was hot so I tied my jacket around my waist (as I often do bc that’s just typically part of my look, kinda like a staple of mine tbh) and her friend is like “ryán why are you wearing that around your waist, go put it in the coat check” and I was like no thanks like I really don’t mind having it on my waist, I like the way it looks and I honestly don’t wanna pay and she’s like “you have to check it, any girl who walks in here and sees a guy with a jacket around his waist will not want to get with him” and I looked at her and laughed and was like “lol ok well that’s fine because I’m into guys anyway” and she was taken aback like “OH” and I was like lol r u surprised and she was like well your sister just never told me that and I said well idk why she would, like for one I’m not sure why that would be a topic of discussion between the two of you and for two I haven’t told her anyway. She and my sisters other gay friend practically forced me to tell her the entire night and I was like um ok. And then my sister got mad at me for telling them before her and made it all about herself and I was drunk crying running to the bathroom lol and she followed it up with SO MANY questions and was like you gotta tell mom and dad we talk about it all the time. And I was like 1. No I don’t, if they wanna know they can ask me I don’t care 2. That’s kinda fucked up that you guys talk about me and my sexuality all the time behind my back?? 3. If you just said u all know why do I have to tell you. There isn’t really more to the story there, it was her telling me to and me saying no.

4. It is the 2019th summer. Id thought many times about telling my parents I wanted to go to pride and just like ended up saying nothing. Fact of the matter was that I wasn’t proud and honestly even if I wanted to go I didn’t know who I’d go with. My parents are VERY religious and when I was younger I had heard my mom express worry about a girls mother after the girl had come out as a lesbian l o l. Years go by and my mom got me a pamphlet for the lgbt center mixed in with a bunch of other papers when I moved in my freshman dorm, said a lot of encouraging things to me like telling me “you can date anyone you want” and asking me about my love life (this kind of stuff happened between stages 1 and 2). Nothing was explicitly said but I think we both silently acknowledged it. She even asked about one of my gay friends bc I think she thought we mightve been dating (between stage 3 and 4) which we were not and never have hooked up or anything. Honestly I knew they’d be supportive and I knew they weren’t going to kick me out, I just didn’t know how they’d honestly and truly take it. And by the time that I didn’t give a fuck about how anybody “took” the “news” I was aware that they knew and subscribed to all the beliefs that I listed above. If they wanted to know so desperately they could ask me. At this point I wasn’t even trying to hide it. A guy kinda fucked me over right before school was over and I was talking to her on the phone and she was asking how I was and why I sounded meh and I just told her guys suck without trying to get into it. Anyhow picture this, straight pride has just been confirmed for August 2019. Gays are distressed everywhere. Can we not have one thing??? I share a post to my insta story stating something along the lines of “straight pride isn’t necessary and you should be happy you don’t need it. LGBT people need pride because we still don’t have equal rights and people get killed every day for being a part of this community and people get kicked out of their homes for loving someone, etc.” and I guess my mom saw it and was like that was an interesting post on your instagram and I was like lol ok thanks. (She had thought I didn’t think I was safe in my own home and that’s why I wasn’t coming out) And she’s like is there something you want to tell me? And I say is there something you want me to tell you? And she says only if you want to. And I say “what mom do you want me to tell you I’m gay? Like it’s not a secret. I know you know and everybody else knows.” We went on a walk and she said some highly questionable microaggressions but meant with overall support. At this point though like I already accepted myself so I could just roll my eyes and be like lol whatever you don’t get it.

Then my dad comes back and she calls him to the kitchen and is like I think you should tell him now. And i was like gurl what? This is so out of nowhere and so ridiculous. You’re really going to do this after we just had an hourlong discussion on why I didn’t feel the need to come out. And my dad comes in and is like what’s up and I say hey just so you know I’m gay, ok? And he says ok.

[transrightsjimin]

copy pasting from my twt bc i dont feel like writing this fully twice

urghghgh i feel fcking messed up whst the fuckk.. i was working nd had to deliver two packages and a letter at this one door but a guy lied n front of it nd i thought he was drunk nd homeless nd he was cursing a bit while lying on the stairs so i hesitated a bit but then still went back to try anyway but then he got up nd tried to intimidate me nd kept getting closer nd i still thought he was drunk nd could hurt me nd my instant reaction to intimidation / being scared is to cry so i ended up crying rly badly nd i saw a woman stand outside i the street nd later on more ppl. he followed me around sort of nd used misogynistic slurs nd threw his hat into my face but he also asked me nd others to not hurt him nd he seemed confused abt what my job was nd he walked back nd forth in directions.

so i first thought he was drunk but residents said he was prob in a psychosis nd i think that made more sense. nd they had called the cops on him nd tried to reassure me by asking to stay w them until cops arrived??? nd they wouldnt listen to me when i said i wasnt reassured at that at all nd that i just wanted to continue to the next street nd it seemed fine bc he walked into the other direction anyway, nd i was crying so bad from the initial shock of thinking he’d hurt me + the overstimulation of ppl talking through each other and not listening at all to me expressing i was concerned cops were gonna taze or kill him nd the residents either ignored me or said 'they wouldnt do that, i knew a person in psychosis who wasnt treated lke that' or said that medical assistance wont help either nd one dude even closed the door on me nd the woman who initially stayed w me for ‘protection‘ just walked away nd said ‘okay, yes, sure, whatever‘ sarcastically when she did finally stop talking over me. like my voice was more raised nd unstable bc of the crying nd now i seemed like a weird person to them too probably bc of the way i talked nd no one of them can imagine hating cops nd not all of them even were white nd it jst felt so disorienting but im also embarrassed i even mentioned that to them when clearly a lot of ppl in this country love cops nd especially the ones who CALL them jhjjkhhgj G OD

so i went around the corner nd called my friend in panic nd he suggested i go home nd i was like go home???? im still working?? i cant just not deliver all these bags of mail?? nd in the midst of our convo the cops drove by nd called for me nd i tried to ignore them but they kepr calling

nd i eventually did take out my earbuds bc i was afraid i be seen as suspicious or smth somehow which prob makes no sense, nd they asked if i was attacked nd i think everyone assumed so bc i was crying nd shaking so much but i just cry very easily??

i thought that they might not have found him yet or maybe did nd were considering pressing charges nd so i tried to at least (hopefully??) prevent violence or punishment against the man nd said hes not armed nd wasnt rly capable of attacking. nd they said oh so hes ´in de war´ (which translates to confused but in this case is a vague term for psychotic) nd i said yes nd emphasised tht he asked me nd others to not harm him. they kept asking me for my name nd i said i didnt want to give it out, i just want to work, nd i was stupid enough to say i was afraid the man would get tazed instead of help likE EWRTDGDJFH WHAT AM I DOING HERE TALKING TO PIGS IN ANGER ND REFUSING TO GIVE MY NAME DESPITE BEING IN MY WORKING CLOTHES??? ONE OF THEM EVEN TOOK A NOTE AS I REFUSED TO GIVE MY NAME  hjGDSDJHFKDJSGD

nd when they left i whatsapped my work teamcoach abt the situation nd why i couldnt continue working nd then called my friend again nd finally went home nd i was suddenly very dizzy nd still crying rn like god.  i feel so weird 

ok after i wrote that i got called by my teamcoach nd he understood nd assured me / recommended me to just try to take rest for the rest of the evening and tomorrow (january 1st isnt a working day anyway) nd deliver the rest of the mail on saturday morning if i can GDFHKJG I ALREADY HAVE 3 OTHER ROUTES ON SATURDAY BUT OK.. but god im still distraught by this. what a way to end the year

[sirduck45]

Book 10

Hey this is just a chapter from a book I’m writing I hope you enjoy. I was also told that someone actually enjoyed reading something of mine???? Im gonna push through and finish the other half of that story for you, thank you for supporting me!!!

1 “Ok you need to tell me what’s going on right now,” Rebel demanded as she slammed the cellar door behind her.  

2 “What do you mean?” Fly said nonchalantly leaning up against a few crates full of booze.  

3 “You know damn well what I mean! You don’t drink, you said you had problems with these guys!  How do you even know them?” Rebel sputtered her fists clenched, she just hoped that the men in the bar wouldn’t hear her yelling.  

4 “Here,” Fly sighed and extended her arm which held out her almost empty glass. Rebel’s nose scrunched up in disgust, she wasn’t about to let the person who dragged her across the country for the past few months get her wasted when they were supposed to be in hiding. If Fly wouldn’t protect them then it was up to her.  

5 “Just smell it,” Fly groaned. Rebel stood for a second with her arms crossed, but soon gave in to her curiosity and stepped forward cautiously. With two short sniffs she couldn’t smell anything. One step forward, nothing. With another step forward and another deep breath she could almost taste it: lemons.  

6 “I told you I didn’t drink anymore,” Fly took a sip from her glass. “Something happened with these guys and I promised myself I’d never let it happen again. So, this was the solution.” Her gaze seemed to be fixed on something far away as the terrible memories replayed in her head. At times like these, her age showed through her young exterior. All the pain and suffering could be seen in her eyes as she recalled all the mistakes she made, all the people she left behind.  

7“What happened?” Rebel asked cautiously. Hoping her leader might divulge her in a bit about her past. Fly looked up at her breaking herself away from the daze that she caught herself in.  

8 Right, like Fly would tell her. But in Rebel's eyes, there was something else. An almost understanding, but how could she possibly understand what it was like to be her, to be a...  

9 Fly shook her head and looked away. This wasn’t happening. Introducing all the other girls to the guys who ran the bar was a trip enough down memory lane.  

10 Rebel took a small step forward, not wanting to let her leave without knowing what had happened to her. “Fly? You can tell me.”  

11 Could Fly even do this? Tell her about what she did? About him? All of it? Fly looked up into Rebel’s eyes, the same soft green eyes that she had, stared back at her. How could the two of them be so alike and so different at the same time?  

12 After a moment of pause Fly spoke, “It all started... back in World War II.” She hesitated for a moment, allowing all the bitter memories to come back. They bit at her like Hellhounds come to take her back to where she belonged. “It was just a regular mission; I was leading a small group to go take down a Nazi official.”  

13 “Well, I say leading but –uh- you know, they had these -uh -handlers, to- um... keep me in check.” She paused remembering what happened when she got home. Fly stood up a bit taller, now looking at the wall past Rebel. Her fists clenched remembering the crack of the whip, the blood, the scars. “They never really could trust something like me.”  

14 “But uh...” Fly smiled remembering the only reason why it was worth it all. The only memory that wouldn’t cause her this pain. Rebel captivated by this indulgence into Fly’s past leaned up against an adjacent crate.  

15 “There was this guy,” Fly explained slowly as she recreated his face in her memory. “He was a bit of an asshole at first but uh... we um...” She paused unsure of how to explain the feeling without sounding like an idiot.  

16 “You fell in love?” Rebel’s voice was quiet. Fly nodded not wanting to admit anything out loud.  

17 Rebel’s eyes softened as she looked upon her leader in a new light. Her fearless leader has never shown such insecurity before, and most likely never will again. After months and months of being dragged around this was the most that Fly had ever talked about herself.  

18 “We... had a few nights together, never really thinking about the future, which I guess was for the best,” Fly’s smile quickly faded. “Last day of the mission we were meeting at the rendezvous but there was an ambush and...” The blood was all over her hands again. The pounding of the gunshots in her ears. The screaming and crying. Unable to see his face as tears blurred even her memories.  

19 She took a ragged breath and continued, “I got back to the states and in all honesty, I was lost. One day I wandered out here and found these guys.” She chuckled at the memory, “They had made a bar based on me when I was a cowboy.” Rebel had figured that when she saw the theme of the bar, every old man up there was saying that everything on the walls was once hers. From the cowboy hat to the Harley in the garage.

20 “Things were great for a while, you know, taking our hogs for rides, they even gave me the nickname Lady. But after Nam we were all changed, the ones who were left anyways. I guess I was... drowning my mistakes seemed better than facing them you know?” There was a brief pause as Fly thought back to those dark days of blackout drunk men and her just sitting alone with a half-empty bottle.  

21 “... I don’t know why or how but we ended up having like a little fight club at the bar. Really it was just them getting drunk and trying to wrestle me as a bear or a gorilla or something.” Fly forced a small laugh as her free hand gripped the crate she was leaning up on.  

22 “But um... one night we all got wasted, like borderline blackout, and I got rough... really rough.”  

23 “How bad was it?” Rebels voice seemed loud as it echoed in the small dark cellar. A twinge of regret spread through her as she hated making Fly remember all this pain.  

24 “He ended up in the hospital,” Fly’s eyes glistened, but no tears fell. “When he got back nothing was the same. They all said it was fine, but I knew it wasn’t... I... I feel like I can’t control it sometimes. This monster inside of me... I just decided to leave. On my own, things would be better.” Fly sniffed as she rubbed her nose, she probably looked so pathetic. With a small cough to clear her throat, she composed herself and stood up straight.  

25 Rebel stood there ashamed. Ashamed for accusing her. Ashamed for not trusting her. Ashamed for blaming everything that went wrong with the ship on her. Rebel took a step forward, but Fly put up her hand.  

26 “I don’t need your sympathy,” Her head was still down, but her voice cracked. “I-I don’t need-” But before she could protest Rebels arms were wrapped around her. She tensed up and didn’t move, not used to close contact. But it felt ...nice.  

27 Slowly Rebel could feel a pair of arms gently embrace her. No words were spoken. Both girls had been broken by this world and the next. Their worlds had been taken from them. Friends killed before their eyes. It was at this moment Rebel realized how similar they were.  

28 Fly let go, her voice hoarse, “don’t tell anyone about this.” All of her respect from the others upstairs would be lost if anyone knew about this exchange. With a small smile Rebel nodded at her leader.  

29 The two girls moved towards the door, but Rebel had paused. An old picture that was lying on a crate had caught her eye. Black and white unsmiling faces stared back at her. Fly stood in the picture in front of a line of four men, looking the same as she did today.  

30 Fly picked up the picture and inspected every face. Jaqu, the French sniper who barely talked. Morgans the medic who would faint at the slightest mention of blood. Patell, Fly’s handler who was supposed to keep her in check throughout the missions. Then there was...  

31 “Is that him?” Rebel asked as Fly’s finger brushed against the picture. His laugh, and sarcastic comments, the way he would show off, it all came flooding back to her. She had been alive for nearly three hundred and fifty years. Memories of her parents, homeland, all the other people who have helped her on her journey had faded away with time. But not him, only three days she had known him, and yet she would never forget.  

32 Fly nodded as her fingers curled around the frame.  

33 “What was his name?”  

34 “Mark.”

[ellana-ravenwood]

Salt, Tequila, Lemon - Jason Todd x Reader

Please read this intro, thank you very much :  

So. I posted this yesterday, but after a bug on the Tumblr app on my phone it got deleted. I’m super bummed out because it had over 200 notes and quite a few feedbacks that I never got to read because it was accidentally deleted...If the people that took the time to comment things on the story could take a bit more time to write a little comment again and give me their feedbacks, and also if the people that liked and reblog could do it once more...i’d appreciate the hell out of you <3.  So reposting it (thanks god I always have back ups of all my stories now). Written in twenty minutes during my break at work. Bam. Hope you’ll like it :

Also, since Tumblr’s new guidelines and enforcement of it, I DON’T really appear in searches anymore, so the only way for this story to be seen by others than those who follow me is to reblog it. So if you wanna, you can show your support for my writing by doing just that. Thanks very much. You can find my masterlist here : @ella-ravenwood-archives

_________________________________________________

Ok. So. Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Oh, right. 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

Got it. Licking the back of your hand to make the salt stick to it, you pour yourself a massive shot of “To-Kill-Ya” in your coffee mug, not even caring about the fact that there is still some remnant of your cappuccino from last night in it. 

You focus on the sound the liquid makes as it fills your cup. Makes you think about something else. Good. Yup. This was totally gonna help right now. 

“Cheers”, you exclaim to yourself, your empty apartment echoing your voice. 

Salt. 

Wincing. Stingy. Salt on its own is gross. 

Tequila. 

More wincing. Oh my god, it burns. The coffee that was still at the bottom of the cup is an oddly nice touch. 

Lemon. 

The last of the Wincing. 

You spit the piece of lemon you just bit into in the trash and…miss. The yellow fruit falls with a little flat sound on the floor, and you honestly can’t bother to pick it up. Your apartment is a mess anyway, so you just stare at it angrily and pour yourself another drink. 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

You gulp the last of the citrus and shiver. Miss the trash again. 

Damn. This was good. 

Well, actually, it was disgusting. 

You didn’t like strong alcohol and what the Hell ?! Why did you leave a bit of coffee in your cup ? Now that the aftertaste was kicking in, it was actually really gross. If the tequila itself didn’t make you wanna throw up, the stale coffee taste nearly did. Oh, and the salt and lemon combination was as awful as ever. 

You really didn’t like salt, tequila, or lemon. 

But it was still good. 

Because thanks to all this immediate awfulness, you could slowly feel yourself drift into “haze land”, and forget about your worries. 

Forget that your boyfriend of two years just cheated on you with some random woman you worked with. Woman that, by the way, he met at the Christmas “end of the year” party from you work you invited him to…You gave him free champagne and mise-en-bouche and all your love, and he broke your heart. 

It wasn’t your thing, to drink your sorrow away. And it wasn’t your thing either to wallow because of a man…But you genuinely thought he was “the one” (oh what a mistake you would soon realize that was). 

He was always so nice, treating you like a princess. He complimented you daily, and never forgot an important date. He was affectionate, not to an annoying point. He was the perfectamount of affectionate. He was a gentleman and seemed to love you and yet, he betrayed you. 

If a man like him, that was nothing short but sweet and passionate with you, cheated on you, then did that mean you couldn’t trust anyone ? 

Because in your eyes right now, he was perfect. Albeit said eyes were slightly clouded by a a few tequila shots. 

You were downing a fourth drink starting to slowly sob when…

There’s very few things that can get you out of a drunk state in seconds. 

An extremely cold shower could do the trick, for instance. Brings you back to your senses a bit you know ? You wouldn’t magically be sober, but you’d get a clearer mind. Or someone giving you shocking news ! Or like, an event so incredible that your body just forgets how drunk it is for a minute. 

And this event, for you, came at the perfect time. 

Right when you were entering your “sad drunk” phase, which was between the “lol alcohol does NOTHING to me” phase where you downed most of your drinks, and the “dancing on the bar’s counter” phase (a few more drinks and you would have a one woman dance party in your living room, acting as if you were on a bar’s counter and that your name was suddenly “Britney”).

Right when you were about to wallow times a thousand, and cry, and yell “whyyyyyyy ?!” to the sky, arms in the air (drama queen). 

Years later, looking back on that particular event, you’ll start to realize that Destiny HAS to exist. Because come on, it was just too perfect a timing to be a simple coincidence. 

You were about to swallow up your fifth drink, launching yourself head first into the “sad phase” when an ear shattering noise rang all around your apartment. 

Broken glass. 

It was the sound of broken glass. Heightened to the max by your drunkness. You turned on your stool, and…there he was. 

It was a guy. That you were sure of because he had no boobs and too much pecs. And that guy…well that guy just flew right through your window, destroying it. How rude. 

There was glass everywhere. 

How much did a window cost ? Probably a fortune. 

You wondered briefly if you could just use aluminium foil and tape the shit up. There was nothing of value to steal in your apartment anyway, and if aluminium foil could keep meals warm, it definitely worked with a house too right ? 

You sobered up quite a bit, but you were also very drunk when this event happened, so your mind was still in that cloudy weird phase where your priorities were…interesting. 

You worried more about the broken window at first, than about that guy who just launched through it. 

A guy. 

Not just any guy. 

You saw that guy before. 

He was one of those night vigilante your crazy hometown was filled with…RED HOOD !! 

“Thick thighs”, is the first thing you thought right after you recognized him (priorities). 

The second thing you thought was that you needed another drink, and so you downed what was your fifth one, but with that crazy thing happening ended up being on the same level as if it was a second one. You were tipsy, but not “drunk” anymore. 

The third thing that came to your mind was…Is he still alive ? 

No cause, he was like, just laying there, on your living room’s floor, not moving. 

“…Outch.” 

Oh. He spoke. 

So he ain’t dead. Good, means you can have another drink then, you don’t need a clear mind to call an ambulance or something. 

Oddly enough, in your half-drunk half-sober state, this sounded completely reasonable. Nevermind if Red Hood had some internal bleeding or something. He talked. He was probably fine. 

A minute passed, and you just sat there, sipping up your tequila in between taking a pinch of salt and biting into a piece of lemon. 

Salt, tequila, lemon. Great remedy against heartbreaks. 

Wait, were you heartbroken ? Really ? You couldn’t really recall that fact now. But, yeah…it was the reason why you were drinking right ? Because right now, all you could think about was the fact that this Red hood guy had abs for days…

This unforeseen event sobered you up quite a bit, but the two shots you just took kinda brought you back to the same state than you were before.

Well. Not quite. You were drunk as hell again, but seemed to have avoided the “sad phase”. Instead, Red Hood bursting quite literally through your window took you to another road. 

The : “Cool, I got a drinking buddy phase”. Well, taking for granted he didn’t have any internal bleeding and wouldn’t die while biting into a lemon wedge. 

“Tough day ?” 

You ask him, as he slowly sits up and shakes his head, trying to regain his senses. He looks towards you and seem surprised (or at least you think he is, because he wears a mask so…kinda hard to tell). 

************

Jason definitely thought he was alone in this place, because no sane person would just sit there, not saying anything, as someone simply jumped through their window. Nope, most people would just freak out. Scream. 

He knows, because it’s not the first time he falls through a window during a night on duty. And every single time it happened, people freaked out. Screamed. Threw stuffs at him, or hid away begging for their life to be spared. 

And yet here you were, half a bottle of tequila in front of you, surrounded by lemon wedges you bit into, and table salt all over your hand, just staring at him curiously. And did you just say : “tough day” ?  

Well, Jason guessed the empty half of the bottle was why you were so chilled about it all. He sat up, and slowly got back to his feet. 

Usually, going through a window meant the end of the night for him. He’d go back to one of his secret stash, patch himself up and get some rest. Most of the time, he fell through windows because someone pushed him or threw him there…Though today, he just embarrassingly missed a step and fell by himself. 

Of course, no one would ever now he tripped while jumping from one building to another (you lived on the last floor) and went careening into your home (and life). Nope, the official story would be that he fought a fierce enemy and was thrown into that window. Finding fake villains name was easy, given how truly ridiculous some could be. 

Tim and Damian were still after the “Illusive Blue Man” that he totally made up that one time he walked into a poll and had a huge black eye that he couldn’t quite explain…Oh man, he had to stop telling such elaborate lies and just say “I fought with a few guys last night” without more explanation. 

But he couldn’t help it. And those kids believed everything he said, it was too tempting…But for now, this wasn’t the issue. Nope. 

He did a quick check of his body and knew he wasn’t really hurt (thanks “dad” for the amazing body armor ugh ?), so he was planning on leaving that poor girl’s house and send a mystery check in the mail to pay for the damage (money stolen from a certain Bruce Wayne of course, as if he would pay himself). 

Yup. He was just gonna stand up, and go on his way and…somehow, he found himself sitting on the stool opposite side of this mysterious girl, and now she was peppering salt on his hand ? 

“Salt”, she says, and she has a cute drunk voice. Jason almost forgets he just went through a window a few minutes ago. 

“Tequila”, she continues, downing her drink and pointing at the one she poured him. He doesn’t even care the she poured it in a cereal bowl that she didn’t even seem to have clean…He drunk worst things in worst recipient. He turns away to take off his mask and so that she can’t see his face, and “bottom’s up”. 

“Lemon !” she finishes, biting into the sour fruit and spitting it in the direction of the trashcan but missing completely. The lemon wedge goes to lost itself amongst his fallen brothers…

Jason bites into his own lemons, and spits it. Right into the garbage. 

There’s a slight pause, where she just stares at the trashcan, and then at Jason, back to the trashcan, and then turns to him again and simply says : 

“Wow.” 

************

So. This was surreal. 

Here you were. In your home. Taking tequila shots. With…Red Hood. 

One of Gotham’s night vigilante. The most violent one. But the dude seemed chilled. He was holding his liquor really well. 

And now you were talking about your broken heart, telling him the story as if he’d been your friend for years. And he was listening. Intently. And reacting to what you were saying. It had been a LONG time, since you had this kind of talk with anyone, and despite the fact you were drunk, you still noticed how nice it felt to have someone to talk to. Someone that genuinely listened. 

“And then he slept with her !” you say angrily. 

“Nooooooo !?!” 

“Yes, he did ! He slept with…with…what was her name…”

“Nicole. From accounting.” 

“Right, Nicole from accounting ! That bitch ! She always just…counts and shit ! And he slept with her ! Nicole from accounting ! Whom he met thanks to me, by the way ! At a partyyyy !! At my wooooork !!” 

“What an ass.” 

“Right ?! Oh but he had such a good ass though…Quite firm. But whenever he wore jeans, it was super flat.” 

“So, not such a good ass in the end then ?” 

“I guess not. You have a good ass. Popping right out in this outfit of yours.” 

Red Hood chuckles, and the sound of his laughter makes you forget that you just said something incredibly embarrassing. His voice is…nice. Deep. Manly. You like it. You wanna make him chuckle some more, so you say, hoping : 

“And it looks very firm. Not just quite firm.” 

It works. He snorts and it’s very cute. Oh wow. He can be sexy and cute. Full package. You smile a bit dreamily. 

For a second, he’s lost in that smile of yours, and there’s a silence installing itself in the room. A comfortable one. That you break : 

“Ok. So now, he’s not that perfect anymore ! He got no ass ! Penalty points ! I never notice how un-assed he was before…” 

Jason smiles and damn. He’s hot. 

Somewhere along the way, he stopped turning his face away from you whenever he took a shot, and just ended up taking his helmet off. He was probably hoping that you’d black out or something, so you wouldn’t remember his face (or he just didn’t care). 

In any case, you were pretty sure you never saw him before. His face kinda reminded you of an old memory. Of someone you saw somewhere long ago, when you were a kid…Which wasn’t really a big help right ? 

Right. You had no idea who he was. And in your drunken state, probably couldn’t piece anything together anyway. So even if you did know who he could be, you wouldn’t know in the end anyway…Makes perfect sense right ?

What you knew was : he’s hot. 

This white streak in his hair did something to you that you couldn’t explain. And that jawline ? You would love to get cut on that bitch.  It could actually cut a bitch, you were sure of it. Those blue eyes ? You’ve never seen someone with such blue eyes. And did you mention to yourself how muscular he was ? Because man you only saw guys like this in magazines ! 

But beyond his handsome features, he seemed like a nice guy. Like he was listening to you, a total stranger. And this realization suddenly raised your guard up. 

You also thought that your ex-cheating-boyfriend was a nice guy. And come to think of it, who the hell just barge in someone’s home like that, and actually stay to drink tequila shots ?! Wait but…in your guts…it’s not like with your ex. 

You don’t think he’s a nice guy. You know he is. 

************

There’s a visible shift in your mood, after this realization. So far, you talked to him about your broken heart freely, and he listened. 

Oddly enough, no words that came out of your (perfect) mouth bored him. Jason wasn’t sure wether it was the alcohol or not, but you captivated him. 

But in a split second, and without him knowing why, your features changed. You were now frowning. Like an unhappy little kid. It was kinda cute, but he didn’t like it because…why were you frowning ? 

He tries to lighten up the mood and says : 

“Well here you go. See, you didn’t loose the perfect guy, his ass was flat in jeans. Can’t work with that, can you ? I bet we can find other flaws. Make you realize he actually was a looser.”  

Your guard is up, but you can’t help but smile a bit, plus you were frowning just now because you realized you just knew you could trust that total stranger, and it was so weird…. 

Besides, no harm in indulging this, because you’re pretty sure it’ll make you feel better to try and see the bad side of your ex-boyfriend, not just his good ones. No one was perfect. And so, still a bit careful, you say : 

“Well…He never got any of my Tv shows or movie references.” 

“Well, here’s a point to take off of his “perfectness”. Doesn’t get pop culture references. Deal breaker.” 

“Yeah…Yeah you’re right. It is. He also used to hate when I made jokes. I like puns ya know ? Terrible ones. Well, he was always embarrassed whenever I made them in public.” 

“Ashamed of his girlfriend, doesn’t sound very gentlemanly, right ?” 

“Yeah. It doesn’t. Maybe he wasn’t such a perfect gentleman…He also used to not want to go out with me if I didn’t wear any make-up and was dressed just casually.” 

“What you mean, he never just went out with you ?” 

“We only went out on dates. I had to dress up. I could be casual home though…” 

“Well goodie, the man let you be yourself when you were home. Big deal. To be honest, sounds like a douchey move.” 

“That was kinda douchey…I never cared what he looked like.” 

And it’s true. For you, physical appearance wasn’t everything. And sure you thought your ex was hot and all, but only because you liked his personality too. You liked his jokes, you were never ashamed of anything he said. 

And right now, sure that stranger that bursted through your window was hot, but the reason you felt like you could tell him things was because he just made you comfortable by his mere aura. Because he gave you such a good vibe. 

You never were fully about appearances. It was always just a bonus for you…So it never occurred to you why your ex would only hang out in public with you if you were pampered. Like he used to hate when you just wore hoodies and no make-up, even if you didn’t need make-up to be beautiful. 

Comes to think of it, he was very much about appearances…Uh. Interesting. You never realized that before. 

You turn to Red Hood, and the look on your face says it all. You’re slowly realizing maybe you didn’t just lost “the one”. The vigilante says : 

“Ok, so : no ass, no humor apparently, doesn’t get pop culture references, and was kind of a jerk when it came to going out with you…” 

“He did tell me often that I was beautiful though. Including when I just woke up from a night out, and was awful looking.”

“Yeah, but he never went out with you looking like that. He shouldn’t feel ashamed of hanging out with you looking like that. Just like he shouldn’t feel embarrassed when you joke. He can be exasperated, like if you really make bad puns, sure. And he can think it’s unfunny…But embarrassed ? No.” 

“I guess…I never thought about it.” 

“Well let me tell you, as someone who does not know neither you nor him personally, he sounds like a bit of a jerk. Let’s not forget he cheated as well. Like, that’s not something good people do. Especially not with…Nicole from accounting.” 

“Nicole from accounting…Yeah. They’re together now though.” 

“So ? He should’ve broken up with you if he realized he liked her. That’s the right thing to do. Trust me on that, I put villains behind bars for a living, I know what’s right or wrong.” 

“I heard you kill criminals.” 

“Used to. I used to kill criminals, I had issues. I’ll tell you one day if you wanna. It’s a real tear jerker story. With clowns and crowbars. And I’m telling you that because I’m drunk, right now. Also, if we want to be specific, I don’t actually make a living out of putting villains behind bars. Like, I don’t get paid or anything…” 

Jason finds himself ranting about anything that comes to his mind, and though he hears himself claim it’s because of the alcohol he’s saying all this, he realizes maybe there’s something else making him want to talk. 

You. A total stranger he walked upon. Or rather, went-through-the-window upon.  Who didn’t freak out when he went through said window. And instead, invited him over to have tequila shots. 

Because, according to your grandmother, the best remedy to…basically any problems in life, was “salt, tequila, lemon”. 

“She was a wise woman.” 

He says, and you turn to him, clearly not understanding what he was talking about. 

“Who ?” 

“Your grandma. For saying that salt, tequila and lemon was a great remedy against heartbreaks and all.” 

“Oh. Yeah. I wouldn’t know, I never met her. She died before I was born.” 

“Well what she passed on to your parents is great.” 

“What ?”

“Well, that “salt, tequila and lemon” thing, I assume she said that to your mom or dad, and then they said that to you, and then it became your grandma’s advice. Right ?” 

“…Nah. It’s an excuse I made up. Whenever I need to justify something, I just say “like my grandma said, ain’t no shame in eating an entire tub of ice cream if you want to”, and then people are just like “oh yeah, cool”, because when you say the word “grandma”, then it gives a perspective to your words ya know ?” 

Jason had no idea what you were on about, but he loved it. You seemed to be very smart. And witty. And funny. The hell did that guy cheated on you for ? And why was he ashamed of going out in public with you when you weren’t dressed up ?! 

You currently wore “Hello Kitty” pyjamas, had absolutely no make up on, and your hair was a mess, and he thought you looked gorgeous.

“Why are you so nice ?” 

Your question takes him by surprise, and for a few seconds he doesn’t register it and just says : “ugh ?” 

“To me. Why are you so nice to me ? Is it the alcohol ? Does it make you nice ? Or are you just nice to every stranger ? Every girl you destroy the windows of ? Or are you like my ex ? You seem nice, but then you go off and cheat on your girl simply because you like another girl and you’re too cowardly to break up with your current girl ?” 

Jason hiccups slightly, and says : 

“No, I’m not nice to any girl I met. I’m actually usually kind of a jerk, too “brutally honest”. But you…I don’t know. You give me good feelings. Oh and here’s to add on his flaws list. “Coward”. Can’t even break up with a girl, has to wait to get caught red-handed and break her heart. Cooooward. Bad flaw. Kind of guy who runs in the face of danger, instead of standing by you.” 

It’s probably the fact that he said “you give me good feelings” that spurs this in you. That gives you a new clearer perspective on things. 

“My heart wasn’t broken.”

It’s a shock, to you. This realization. This sudden feeling jumping in your face. You…are not heartbroken. You’re mad. You’re frustrated. You feel betrayed. You feel a crazy burning anger towards your ex for toying around with you like that. For not having the balls to just break up, after spending two years together. 

He was suppose to know you. To be your friend. Things could have turned out better. He could have just come up to you, say the truth, and…You were pretty sure you’d still be friend. Because he really was a great guy. 

He really was all the good thing you though about him. He made a mistake, an unforgivable one in your book. But he was a great guy. 

He was just…not your great guy. Not anymore at least. 

And you realized, there, quite drunk, that…It was ok.  

Your heart wasn’t broken.  

Your heart wasn’t broken. 

Your pride was. Your trust was. But your heart ? …Maybe you weren’t completely in love with him. You were best friends, yes, but love ? Maybe it wasn’t love…

Your heart wasn’t broken. 

“My heart isn’t broken.” 

You tell Red hood, looking at him right in his wonderful ocean blue eyes. And he looks right back at you, and just nods. Just like that. And then he pours you one last tequila shot. 

Because like your grandma would say : “When you make great discovery about yourself…Salt, tequila, lemon”. 

************

It took you only a few hours with him to realize that you weren’t in love with your ex, and that was kinda scary. Because this realization didn’t come from nowhere. 

Nope. 

But when he said that your ex broke your heart, you felt obligated to tell him that no. No your heart wasn’t broken. You were sad and angry, yes, but not heartbroken. For you, in that moment, it was important for this total stranger to know you weren’t actually in love. 

Hell, you didn’t even know yourself you weren’t that in love before you talked to him. It just came as a sudden, yet utterly true revelation. 

Because, and this wasn’t the alcohol speaking…You felt incredibly attracted to that guy. To Red Hood. Not just because of the white streak in his hair, and the eyes, and smile, and voice, and abs, and thick thighs. That too, sure, but not only…Nope. 

Nope. Not because of this. 

But because he had a tough day (he said so himself, explaining to you how he went through the window…he was fighting a super-villain when he got flung through your window, tough tough time ahem), and yet he sat with a crazy lady that peppered salt on his hand and practically forced him to take a tequila shot…

Because you could see in his eyes, and felt in your guts that he didn’t have an easy life…and yet he took a break from whatever he was doing to just sit with you and listen to you. He didn’t even make sense, that you trusted those feelings so fiercely. And yet, you did. Because he listened to you. 

He saw you were struggling and he stayed. And though you felt you couldn’t trust anyone at that time…You oddly felt like he was ok. 

Like he wouldn’t be the kind of guy to cheat, or run in the face of danger, leaving you all alone to fight off demons. 

In a few short hours, you fell for this guy more than you ever fell for your ex. 

What did that say about you uh ? …That was pretty pathetic…

************

Jason didn’t think that you were pathetic at all. 

On the contrary. If he went to seat with you, and drink with you, is because he was instantly mesmerized by you. 

And though he didn’t know at first why, now he was sure of it. 

It’s because you didn’t freak out. And something told him it wasn’t only because you were a bit drunk (he fell in drunk people’s home before…none reacted like you). 

Nope. It was because you were special. He just knew it. Special in every way. Funny. Beautiful. Genuinely listening to him when he was speaking. 

He peppered his own problems within your story, as you told him. And you listened. Hell, even referenced a few things he said early on, way later, while you were crazy drunk. You listened. 

You gave a total stranger that seemed to have a tough day some salt. And tequila. And lemons. 

And then you cared. You asked him a thousand times if he was ok, and he basically had to take off his armor to prove it so (to your eyes’ greatest pleasure…mm mm mm those muscles). 

Captivated. He was captivated by you. It was strange, and though he knew it was because you were special, he still was unclear as to why his feelings were that strong. 

For someone he just met. And barely knew. And only knew while drunk. 

You were just…Special. 

************

It was surreal. The all thing. 

What started as a night where you planned on wallowing your pain and drinking…ended up changing your life. 

And no one could convince you that it wasn’t Fate. Because what were the odds that Red Hood would fall through YOUR window after tripping (yeah you didn’t buy that “fighting super-villains thing” at all) ?

What were the odds of his timing being so perfect, arriving just before you started to cry ? Because there was no doubt in your mind that if he had come a few seconds later, he wouldn’t have stayed. 

He would have found a crying mess, and maybe he would have tried to confort you but…You wouldn’t have answered. In your “sad phase”, you only cry and whine. He would have eventually left. And the wonderful talk you’d just have, would never have happened. 

But instead. He came right before your lips touch that fatal shot of tequila that would have brought you into the “sad phase”. And took your drunkness down a notch. Rerouted your evening. 

You weren’t wallowing anymore, you were ranting. 

Sharing your anger and frustration. 

And he helped you realize that your ex wasn’t that perfect…That maybe it was just not meant to be…After all, he cheated on you. 

Uh. What a shame. You didn’t even know his name…”Red Hood”…

You wished you knew his name. 

************

The morning lights were rising, and the bottle of tequila was long gone. 

There were still salt and lemons though. For some reason, you decided to buy the entire grocery store’s stock of lemons. 

Red Hood stood up, and said he had to go. 

He was nice about it. Said it was a pleasure to have spend the night with you. You both laughed about the innuendos that ensued. 

You were exactly on the same page. And he understood all your joke referencing to pop culture… 

But it was time for him to go. And he apparently had no intention of telling you his real name. He didn’t hint either at ever coming back to see you again. 

And there was that. Just a nice night, spend talking to a genuine friend that you’ll never see again. 

A genuine friend that you didn’t even know a few hours before. 

Maybe it was the alcohol speaking. Maybe not. 

And even if you ended up never seeing him again, this evening truly changed your life…At least, it saved you from a heartbreak. Made you realize it wasn’t that.

Though, now, as he climbs out of the window again (he couldn’t possibly use the front door), you feel like the actual heartbreak is starting. 

Grandma’s remedy against heartbreak ? Right. 

Salt, tequila, lemon…

But the tequila is all gone. 

“I’ll send someone to fix that window…Sorry again about that. …Bye.” are his last words, and then he’s out. 

And the tequila is all gone. 

************

… 

…

…

…

Days pass by in a blur. 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

Ugh. But you don’t want to this time. You don’t want to get drunk to forget. 

You don’t want to forget him. And you know it’s ridiculous to get that worked up over a guy you met one night and that will never come back. That you didn’t even know the name of. 

This entire night was weird anyway. 

Getting drunk with a dangerous night vigilante. Pouring your heart out to him, and him doing the same. The hell were you even thinking ? 

Salt. Tequila. Lemon. 

That would be a good idea to do this right now, because man…your heart hurt. More than when you discovered your ex sleeping with Nicole. From accounting. But you can’t resolve yourself to drink. To forget. Nope. Instead you…

*Knock knock knock*. 

Uh ? You take a quick look at your clock in the kitchen.10 pm. Who the hell is coming at 10 pm ?! It can only be bad news. Especially in Gotham…You peep into the eyehole and…

WHAT ?! 

You open your door quickly, and… 

“Told you I’d send someone to fix your window.” 

It’s him. It’s Red hood. But in…civilian clothes. 

His ass doesn’t look flat in jeans. 

He’s holding a window wrapped in cardboard, and there’s a toolbox at his feet. 

“Yeah, you did…come in.” 

************

Jason Todd. 

That’s his name. And connections are fast to be made in your brain. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne’s adopted son. That supposedly died…ten years ago. 

And is Red Hood now. Oh. It makes sense. Even his little “killing criminals” thing while Batman never killed. You easily put two and two together. 

Red Hood. Jason Todd. Bruce Wayne. 

Wow. Can’t believe you never guessed that before. Of course Bruce Wayne is Batman. He’s got the motive, the means, the excuses…It’s so obvious. And yet, you never realized. And no one else in Gotham ever realized. 

Jason Todd. 

Now you know his name. 

And he’s fixing your window. Nobody ever fixed windows for you before (even those who broke it).

Um. To add to the “perfect man” list : “Handy”. 

Jason Todd.  

He quickly works the window up, and then he turns to you. While he was working you talked, as if you knew each other for years. Joking around. Like old friends. Like old extremely good and close friends. 

It fits. It clicks. It’s natural. You and him, him and you. 

Barely knowing each others, and yet knowing each others the best. 

Jason. Todd. 

He turns to you now, and with a smirk, he says : 

“Ya know, my grandma always say that when something good happens to you, you need to celebrate. And I feel like this, right now, you and I, though I have no idea what we’re doing and where it’s going…Well it’s still something to celebrate. And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…” 

You smile. 

Yeah. You don’t know where this thing between you two is going, but you do know that you never met someone who so fully understood you. 

And in such a short span of time. And you know you’re not mistaking. It’s a feeling too strong to be a mistake. 

He came back to fix your window for god’s sake. And trusted you enough to tell you his actual name. Without a second thought. Which meant everything. Especially since from all the hint he let slip through last time you saw each others, about his father, well…let’s just say telling people his real name wasn’t really something he was used to. 

But it just works. It fits. It clicks. It’s not like with your ex, because you don’t think you know it does. It just does. The fact that you say those next few words in perfect sync finishes to convince you : 

(“…And she always says, my grandma, that to celebrate perfectly you need…”) 

“Salt, tequila, and lemons.” 

______________________________________________

I’m so mad the Tumblr app crashed and I deleted the original post...Y’all were great and reblogged the hell out of it ! Which is why it got so many notes in such a short span of times. And feedbacks. I haven’t had that many feedbacks on a story in a long time. So just one last time and I won’t bother you with that again : Please, if you enjoyed this story, don’t hesitate to reblog it and share it with others. People who don’t follow me can’t really find my stories anymore so...you’re a big help by spreading them. It’s always very encouraging. 

And if you got the time, feedbacks are always hella appreciated and always make my day a little brighter <3. 

[sparkly-angell]

Stuckony Fic Rec because why not

*= series

ATTENTION! LOST ARM (If found please contact:) by Fakesheep-luna Teen, 8k Bucky doesn't understand why everyone is so worked up. He just went out for a few drinks, made some new friends and passed out in a dumpster. No big deal! "No big deal??" Steve squeaks, throwing his hands up in the air "You lost your arm! And you don't even remember how!" "Well, at least it wasn't the good one."

Guys!! This fic is comedy approved! its really good, made me laugh a lot, and the plot? amazing. Go read!

Break In by Tenspencerriedplease 7k Scott Lang, at least, understood why Tony hated this stupid job so damn much. He had a Masters degree in engineering but Tony was working on a PhD. Unfortunately for him even with his previous experience and schooling- good schooling- he was stuck working in a knockoff version of McDonald’s meets Subway. At least he works there until he meets Steve and Bucky.

askfjnsfdjsn aaaaaaaa I love gang AU and this one is Great. Highly recomend!

Brooklyn Boys - Bakey Au* by Quicksylver28 Teen/Mature 27k Tony is a bachelor college professor who walks into Steve and Bucky's Bakery/ Cafe. Awkward Flirting ensues.... and fluff, we wont forget the fluff.

ITS SO SWEET! Pun intended. Gosh, I wish I could eat all those baked goods. Sounds delicious. Anyways, the fic is sweet. Peter is a good friend.

Bruises and Drunken Heart Tattoos by Akira_of_the_twilight Teen, 6k An older man in his thirties was standing over Bucky with a bottle of aspirin in one hand, and the fingers of his other hand still gripping the rim of the cup he’d set down on the nightstand. Amber eyes blinked at Bucky in mild surprise. The man’s lips curved into a teasing smirk. “I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

I wanna hug Tony so hard over the course of this fic. It’s cute the way they fall in love. And it’s also funny. 

Canvas, Ink & Paint* by Ficlicious Teen, 11k Bucky's got one goal: to rescue a captured SHIELD agent and get out before the guards realize he's not one of them. Unfortunately, apparently he's also got soulmates, and when their messages and sketches start appearing on his skin, his mission becomes a complicated mess of trying not to get caught covered in their ink.

!!!!!! I love soulmate aus and this fic is one of my favorites!! Poor Bucky, tho, he was just trying to do his work. Go read!! 

Carrier by Just_another_tinker Explicit, 49k Steve and Bucky gift Tony with their jacket that survived from the 1940's. Turns out that wasn't the only thing that survived.

YALL. SO. MUCH. ANGST. and with a happy ending? someone said Pining? PERFECTION. I love the group dimensions in this fic. 

Comic Books and Kings by Ashes0909 Explicit, 10k Tony Stark read Captain America comics and everyone knew it, but it was only ever about Bucky Barnes.

Freacking great! Tony having a crush on Bucky before his crush on Steve? Godsent. 

Coffee Love* by Syriala Good, 8k Tony thought his best day was when Steve walked into the coffee shop he was working in. That was until Bucky came in a few days later.

The fluff!! The flirting!! Their kind of pining! *heart eyes*

Cried For Love (Can’t Stand It) by Potrix Explicit, 7k Bucky braces his hands on his hips, and tilts his head to the side, expression caught somewhere between anxious, confused, and nervous. “Well, shit.” “Yeah,” Steve agrees, worrying at his bottom lip, and rubbing at the back of his neck. “That can’t be good.”

Steve and Bucky become spirits and Tony blames himself (which he shouldn’t but thats Tony for you). I love this fic a loooot! (and i wanna hug tony a loooot too)

Difficult Conversations by Yumekiumono Mature, 34k HYDRA had brainwashed their Asset into silence, and then muzzled him to boot. It's not that surprising that Bucky no longer considers talking to be one of his strong suits. So why does he keep having to have difficult conversations? Or, the road to loving Tony Stark is never an easy one.

!!! Man! Tony/Bucky is strong in this fic, but also Steve is there and he is cute. Ive read some WinterIron fics with a similar plot, but the fact that this is Stuckony makes it 100% better. 

Don’t Say It by Bibliomaniac Teen, 35k Tony Stark is autistic and nonverbal. Which is fine, obviously, except for it means that Steve and Bucky don't have his words, and it only takes him a few minutes to decide they don't need to know he has theirs. That's also totally and definitely fine, until he goes and falls in love with them.

So. Fuckin. Good! Soulmate au. Its a must read fanfic. For real. The pining and the angst. Gosh, Tony is the best fuckin person. He doesn’t deserve all this pain.

Eagles by Spqr Teen, 6k Natasha presses her hand over her heart, and – Tony has heard rumors, that her skin is blank, or that she killed her other half, but he doesn’t believe them. “They deserve to know, don’t you think?” “They’ve been together for ninety years, Nat,” he says. “They’re practically married. There’s no room for me.”

Gosh!! Another soulmate au. Me addicted in them? yes. This one hurts more. I think i really cried while reading it. But has a happy ending so its worth it! 

From Winter’s Cold by 27dragons Explicit, 64 Thanks to one of Thor's crazy stalkers, Tony finds himself stranded in the past. If he significantly changes the course of history, he might never get home again. The choice, when it appears, turns out to be not nearly as difficult as he might have expected.

I simply love this fic. One of my personal favorites! Tony is taken back to 1945 and he finds no one other than.... Bucky. Go read! 

Liebestraum No.3 in A Flat by Daecyan_Shikoba Teen, 10k I humbly request to the pianist: Liebestraum No.3 in A flat

Im actually just doing this rec because of this fic. sfdjnsdkjfsn i love it SO much. Pianist Tony has a crush on his neighbours and has anonymous requests to play the piano. Its great. This fic is so relaxing to read.  

Long Distance by Notevenclosetostraight Explicit, 44k At the end of a bad day, Tony gets drunk and texts Rhodey all his woes. Except he typed the wrong number, and has been texting someone named Steve– who is blond, 28, teaches art and somehow charmed by Tonys drunk rambles.

Go read!!!!!!!! Its cute, full of sexy times and fluff. 

Hands by ezazahaz Teen, 1k He pushed harder, feeling the suit start to crack under his metal hand, the arc reactor giving way. Just a bit more force, and it might push through the grafted skin and false sternum that had replaced the device that had once been a part of the man. This time, instead of saving the man's heart, it would crush it, and he could never hurt Bucky again, never hurt Steve again. Bucky has a nightmare.

I know this one is smoll. But! it’s full of emotion and hurt/comfort. It’s cute. Mostly Bucky/Tony

Hollowness by amobisan Explicit, 63k It feels like a hollowness, when Tony first realizes. First sees. And the first thought, the first thought his useless, traitorous, genius brain can come up with was "At least this time when he leaves, it wasn't your fault."

So. Many. Feels. Tony is so selfless and sad it’s painful. But there’s also so much fluff!!! And a Lot of sexy times. 

How Good You’ve Got It by Orphan Account Mature, 2k Tony was only trying to work on deciphering Loki's power signature, which admittedly what Steve would call 'poking an angry brown bear with a pointy stick'. But if he could just- Shit. It wasn't supposed to do that.

Goddamn. One of my favorite fics!! I’ve already reread this like, three times. It’s small, I know, but the plot? Incredible.

Me through Him to You* by sahiya Teen/Explicit, 71k “You’re sick, you need someone to look after you. This mission could take a couple of days, and I want you in one piece when I get home.” Tony sighed. “Why do you care?” Steve’s mouth twisted unhappily. “I hope that’s the fever talking.” He stepped closer. “When I get home,” he said, so quietly that Tony didn’t think even the nosiest of their nosy friends could hear it, “we’re going to talk, all right? Until then, please let Bucky look after you. Consider it me looking after you, through him.”

First fic: sick fic, sick fic, sick fic!! Fluff!!! Love! Second fic: all. the. angst. you never knew you needed, with ahappy ending, tho. 

Not Like That At All by Catchclaw Explicit, 8k One last gig. That’s what Steve tells himself this'll be.

Hilarious! I s w e a r it’s so funny. I mean- theres a lot of smut that happens but the end? comical. And sweet. Go read!

One Date Wonder by Arukou Explicit, 20k Every week, the same guy comes into Steve and Bucky's diner and every week, he's got a new date on his arm. Guy just can't seem to catch a break, and after a particularly bad date, Steve and Bucky start taking matters into their own hands to help him out.

Sweet, cute, fluffy! Poor Tony I want to hug him :’( Amazing Diner!Au, a must read.

Pretend You Don’t Know Me!  by Aknightofagoodking Teen, 16k Peter forgets that his class is taking a field trip to Stark Tower. Tomorrow. ["So you want us to pretend we don't know you that well?" Mister Stark asks, looking somewhat unhappy. "Yes! Exactly! Pretend I'm actually just an intern. Can you do that for me, please?"]

Ok, so this focus more on Peter. But Stuckony as Peter’s dad? Isn’t that just the best thing in the world? 

Scientific Heresy by Antigrav_vector Mature, 34k In the process of running the particle accelerator in his basement and fixing the arc reactor, Tony finds himself flung into the past where he has to take on a fight not his own if he wants to get home to stop Vanko. At least he had a chance to replace the old rector that had been killing him with the new one before everything went sideways... But now he has no choice but to face off with family, friends, and old heroes, and none of that sounds remotely appealing. Well, okay, getting to meet them all during their glory days kinda does.

AAAA Ok, I love time travel stories, so i might be biased a little, but this is the best!! There’s a lot of action scenes which are great and engaging. It’s a must read. 

That Damn Flight Suit by Orphan Account Explicit, 2k James and Steve make a very interesting discovery about what really is under the Iron Man suit. Cue awkward boners, oblivious Tony, and slightly possessive super-soldiers who really don't want to share his...assets... with the world.

I mean- It’s smut. 

The Sex Shop Around the Corner by sadieb798 Mature, 16k Tony really hates his job. When he tries to figure out what he wants to do next, Tony decides that instead of making weapons for war, he should make things for pleasure. So he decides he's going to open his own sex shop.

cmon, tell me this isn’t the best au out there. skdjfsdkfsn but for real tho, the fic is full of fluff, some pining and kind of a mis communication? perfect. 

The Shirt by Sailorchibi Explicit, 3k How an impulsive decision that Tony made at sixteen and an equally impulsive decision that Tony made at forty-three combined to have the best outcome ever.

Smut. Again. But its damn good as well.

The Stories We Write by Notevenclosetostraight Mature, 33k A question at an interview leads to Steve and Bucky discovering fan fiction, and after piles of coffeeshop au's and fake dating tropes (and screaming over ABO fics) they find an author that writes some of the best fics they've ever read-- reader inserts starring a dark haired, dark eyed male reader as their shared love interest.

This fic is so freacking amazing!! Steve and Bucky are such nerds. Tony is mostly unaware until--

Thats it!!! Hope you enjoy reading them all :) If you want more, you know where to find me ;)

[chvrrybaby]

*itzy  vc*  hey  hey  hey   !   (  i  see  that  i’m  icy  )   what’s  up,  i’m  diana,  i’m  nineteen,  and  i’m  ur  resident  girl  group  stan.  i  reside  in  the  est  timezone  &  go  by  the  pronouns  she/her.  now,  finally  introducing  ...  loona    !!   jk,  her  name  is  blair  &  u  can  learn  abt  her  under  the  cut   !   my  discord  is  lana del rey is coming <3#5522   (  stream  her  new  album  august  30th  ),  so  feel  free  to  message  me  there  or  through  tumblr  im’s  if  u  prefer  that   !   otherwise,  i’ll  come  to  u <3

—  kim doyeon. she/her. cis female. | was that blair ryu i just saw in the hideaway lobby ? i hear the nineteen year old spends most of their time working as a sugar baby/studying classic literature and women’s studies, but i’ve always just seen them writing in her dream journal. they live in 5A and i often see them in the halls. they always give me a vibe of loosely curled hair, cherry lip gloss, the lingering scent of vanilla in the air.

(    𝑩𝑨𝑪𝑲𝑮𝑹𝑶𝑼𝑵𝑫.   )

born on october 5th, 1999  ( this is literally a day before my bday ooc but anyway ajkdhsjdh )  in rochester, new york, blair’s first impression of the world was a crisp autumn day

she was her parents first and only child. her mother was an elementary school teacher, while her father worked at a nearby power plant in ontario

the family never made too much money, but they were able to get by, at least at first

she had a fairly happy childhood, though it was a lonely one. her father was always working odd hours, and with her mother gone during the day, she spent most of her time with a babysitter and the family golden retriever

eventually, she herself started going to school. she immediately excelled in the english department and fell in love with reading. blair realized early on how much she enjoyed escaping reality with a novel, immersing herself in a story so exciting compared to her dull life

almost everything was fine until her high school years. aside from the fact that she never had a present father figure, she was closer to her mom and still loved by both of her parents. however, when her high school years came around, her father lost his job

her father was the families main provider, and her mothers salary alone would not be enough to take care of the entire family. while he searched for another job, they had to give away the family golden retriever to one of blair’s aunts because they couldn’t afford the extra cost :(

on top of losing her beloved pet, the loss of her father’s job prompting the family to pick up and move their entire life

already in the midst of high school, blair had to leave her life as she knew it behind. the family moved to statesboro, georgia, and her father found a job at the nearby power plant

the transition to life in georgia was not easy for blair. though she didn’t exactly have trouble making friends, she didn’t feel like she could truly connect with anyone

once again, blair turned to losing herself in a book to pass the time

shortly after the move to georgia, her parents experienced some difficulties within their marriage. they ended up separating, and blair spent the remainder of her high school years living with each of them for half of the time

she did not mind her parents separating, as she knew it was for the best. however, her father found a girlfriend fairly quickly, and blair would eventually find out her father had been having an affair

her father spent most of his free time with his new girlfriend and her family. blair was upset at how he prioritized his the new people in his life over her when he was barely ever around for her growing up

meanwhile, her mother was having trouble adjusting to being alone, so she moved back to new york to live with her sister

blair stayed behind in georgia to finish high school, but knew she wanted to go elsewhere for college. she wanted to get as far away from her father and his new life as possible

once blair turned eighteen, she began to sell pictures for money. she wanted to earn as much as possible so she could afford to go away for university. she created an alias and began to sell pictures and videos of her feet. eventually, she expanded her horizons once she realized how much money she could earn

she never went as far as sleeping with her clients, but she would go on dates with them and spend the days with them to earn more money ( kind of like ludovica/chiara in the italian show baby on netflix minus sleeping w them )

she dated a few people throughout her high school years, and began to more “seriously” date a guy during her senior year in high school, though she knew the relationship wouldn’t last. despite appearing as a more serious relationship, to her, it wasn’t really anything of the sort, and she mostly wanted a relationship for senior prom and other trivialities

after senior year ended and she had accepted admission into uni in seattle, she basically cut ties with everyone in georgia aksdjskdjh she said good bye forever ! rip poor unnamed boyfriend he didn’t see it coming ...

her father also did not see it coming because she didn’t even tell him where she applied. but at the same time, did he ask ? no :/

once she left for uni, her relationship with her father became very very estranged. she still speaks to her mom on a pretty regular basis, but even then, she has a whole secret life and doesn’t feel particular close to either of them sjkdfhskdjh

and that’s that for background !

(   𝑷𝑬𝑹𝑺𝑶𝑵𝑨𝑳𝑰𝑻𝒀.   )

blair is a libra sun leo moon ( rising sign & other placements tbd )

she is definitely a friendly/sociable person. she can be pretty outgoing and loves to be around people. idk her mbti yet but she is def an extrovert ! ( she does tend to keep her feelings to herself tho )

despite her friendly demeanor, she does have a fiery spirit. if u wrong her she will hold a grudge against u until it gets settled/sorted. she can be more on the mean side when she’s upset, but even then she does not have a bad heart at all

when it comes to relationships, blair is all over the place. she can be very flirty/charismatic and is constantly hopping from one relationship to the next. she hasn’t quite been able to settle down, but it is possible. she kind of thinks being in a real relationship means losing her freedom, because that’s kind of what she saw happen with her parents, so she doesn’t really want to be tied down to someone in fear of losing herself in a way. does this make sense ? maybe ? ok !

blair has a fairly strong sense of self, but she’s still very young so she’s still growing and changing. she is the type of person to know what she wants and go after it ( yes, even with ppl ! ). she will stop at nothinggg to get what she wants ( oop ). u could say she loves the chase, but kind of gets bored afterwards unless u have more to offer !

omg she literally loves 2 be the center of attention. i mean, who doesn’t love attention ? but blair takes it 2 another level. she gets all :( if she’s being ignored or isn’t receiving enough attention

kind of bouncing off the whole attention thing, blair loves a good party ! she’s young and here for a good time. she def loves to drink at parties and stuff even tho she isn’t legal here in the us, why should that stop her am i right ? when it comes to drugs, she’s a veryyy casual user and doesn’t do anything crazy. a social weed smoker n will do pills here and there

being a libra sun with a leo moon, i think it’s safe to say she can be a bit dramatic at times ( i mean, as a libra sun with a leo venus i am not one 2 judge xx ). she reads 2 much and watches 2 many movies like ajkdhsjkhd life rly isn’t that serious but she can b a lil overdramatic sometimes whew ! we told u this was melodrama ... lorde stans make some noise !

blair’s fav books are anything by jane austen and les liaisons dangereuses by pierre choderlos de laclos, aka the book cruel intentions was based on ( which happens 2 be one of her fav movies )

shows she loves: gossip girl ( she shares a name w blair so she probably used 2 call herself queen b in high school or something ), desperate housewives ( no wonder this binch is so dramatic ), big little lies, pretty little liars ( the early seasons only ), the netflix show baby, and buffy the vampire slayer

movies she loves: clueless, almost famous, thoroughbreds, moulin rouge, palo alto, marie antoinette, coyote ugly, american beauty, cruel intentions, and valley of the dolls ( to name a few )

her fav colors are pink, red, and white !

u can find her pinterest board here.

she is bisexual babey !!

(   𝑾𝑨𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑫 𝑪𝑶𝑵𝑵𝑬𝑪𝑻𝑰𝑶𝑵𝑺.   )

party buddies - this is pretty basic and self explanatory, but someone blair can go out and have fun with. their friendship might be more surface level, or started that way at least, but it’s possible they’re closer friends ( maybe she opened up under the influence and it brought them closer aksdhsdjh drunk blair def would )

ex-fling/gf/bf - blair relationship hops, so she could have quite a few of these. we can plot it however, there can b feelings there, they can hate each other, of they can be just friends now, u name it !

unrequited crush -  ur character could have feelings for blair, but maybe she doesn’t feel them back or is unaware that they like her. this could develop into her eventually having feelings for ur muse or not, whatever we want ! OR blair could def have a crush on someone who does not like her back. maybe that person is super non-committal, or they simply do not like her back. we could plot this out however <3

current fling/friends w benefits - someone she is currently seeing/sleeping with. could be no strings attached, or there could b some feelings there. maybe they don’t want to make it anything serious, or maybe they’re ready to take it to the next level. maybe one person is ready to go further, and the other isn’t.

enemies w benefits - imagine the tension!!! they started out hating each other, but ended up hooking up. maybe it was a one time thing, or maybe they can’t stop going back to each other. i think it would b cool if they kept it a secret, they don’t want anyone else to know. this could develop in soooo many ways !

ex-friends - someone she used to consider a close friend, but they had a falling out for whatever reason n maybe they hate each other now. maybe they want to re-kindle their friendship but don’t know how

sibling-like friendship - someone she sees like a sibling. they’re there for each other and look out for one another, always have each other’s backs. being an only child and not really close to her parents, blair would love a friend that she could basically call family !

dynamic duo - basically like her current best friend. this person is prob one of the closest people to her and knows her very well ! they could b a power duo, always looking out for each other 

take care - someone who kind of looks after her ?? maybe when she parties a lil too hard and drinks a lil too much, someone who kind of takes care of her n makes sure shes ok ! they would be someone she trusts a lottttt

confidant - someone who confides in her or someone she confides in, or they confide in each other. they don’t necessarily have to be the closest friends ever, but they get along, trust each other, and maybe they talk more in private

rivals - they hate each other for whatever reason. maybe it’s jealousy or their personalities just clash, but for whatever reason they do not get along. i love a good enemies plot. they can just b nasty to each other !!! maybe they bring out a really bad side to blair that most ppl dont see. someone who makes her act like blair waldorf ( i’m def kidding abt the blair waldorf part )

bad influence - blair isn’t a goody-two-shoes by any means, but doesn’t really do anything crazy, so i’d luvv for someone to kind of influence her to do shit she normally wouldn’t on her own

these are all the plot ideas i can think of for now, but i’ll prob make a plots page later on and add more stuff !

so this is everything !! this has taken me longer than it should have but i’m finally done whew,,, cheers 2 me <3 anyway i would absolutely luv to plot, so feel free to hit me up on discord or tumblr im’s, or i can also come to u ! i’m so excited to get started <333 i’m gonna b logging off now most likely, since it’s 3 am my time, but i’ll be back in the morning

[leelee10898]

Born to Love you: There she goes. (2/?)

Leo & Alicia

This is from the cgw (Cordonians gone wild) universe. A collaborative AU effort by @ao719 @speedyoperarascalparty @cocomaxley @riseandshinelittleblossom and myself.

If you haven't read the OG when Leo met Alicia, I suggest you do so . This takes place the moments between some of the eventa and situations mentioned. Read it HERE

Leo laid in bed, tossing and turning. The night playing over and over in his mind. Her smile, those big brown eyes, her laugh, from the moment he saw her it was like time stopped it was an odd feeling to him. sure he had been attracted to many women, he wasn't dubbed the playboy prince for nothing, but this was different.  He wasn't sure what to think, but one thing he was sure of was the need to see her again, to hang out with her and lucky for him, she was staying in the palace for the next 2 months.

“Anything I can help with?” Liam eyed him suspiciously “you want to help? You hated this stuff, that's why you abdicated.”

The next morning he got up, his mind going a mile a minute. Thinking of ways to spend some time with her. He showered, dressed and headed to Liams office. “Hello little brother, what's on the agenda today?” Leo flopped down on the couch, resting his feet on the desk. “Several proposals to look over, a meeting with the zoning committee for a new park and dinner with Anitah.” Liam nudged his feet off the desk.

“No, I don't mind helping Liam. And we all know i abdicated so I didn't have to marry Madeline.” Leo shot him that cocky grin. Liam shook his head and smiled “touche.” He rubbed his chin sitting back in his chair. “Ok Leo, if you are serious I could use an extra set of eyes and hands on these. Aside from our father you have had the same training as I so I trust you to help.”

Leo poured over the papers with Liam, pointing out several things that should be negotiated to better benefit the country. Liam was happy to have the help, it meant getting to dinner on time, and Anitah would be happy.

“So dinner huh? Is it just you and Anitah?” Leo nonchalantly asked.

“There it is. Leo I warned you stay away, she has a boyfriend. And she's Anitah's best friend.”

Liam tossed his pen on the desk.

“Had. She had a boyfriend,  she's single. And i'm not doing anything. She seems like a fun girl, I'd like to get to know her better.. as Friends, dad!”

Liam let out a long sigh. “Yes, she will be there. I'm assuming you want to join us?”

Leo shook his head “Don't mind if I do.”

“Leo im serious, she's not like these girls at court. She doesn't care about titles or wealth. If you hurt her Anitah will kill you. And then me.”

Leo put his hand up in the air “Let me stop you there Li. I am wanting to hang out with her, to have fun. I said nothing about getting into her pants.”

Liam shook his head standing as they walked out of the study.  “This has disaster written all over it. We leave at 6.”

Liam made reservations at the best restaurant in the capital. They lead them quickly to a private dining room, secluded from the other diners. “Allow me.” Leo  pulled her chair out. “Thank you.” she grinned as he took a seat next to her. Liam doing the same for Anitah.

“So Alicia. how are you enjoying Cordonia?” Liam asked.

“Well, its beautiful from what I've seen. But i have seen the airport, and some of the capital.”  she giggled. “I can show you around, if you'd like. I know many secret spots that aren't on any of the tourist list.” Leo smirked. Liam gave him a pointed look “Really? That would be great. Can we go tomorrow?”

“I don't see why not.” Leo grinned.

They spent the dinner talking laughing and joking. Leo and Liam spilling embarrassing stories from growing up.

Anitah and Alicia crying from laughing so hard. Leo had told them a story from when Liam had just turned 7 Leo had just turned 13 and they were in hawaii for his birthday.  There was a chocolate bar in the hotel and Both boys snuck over sneaking treats. Leo found a lizard on a windowsill, he picked it up and put it on Liam's back. Liam freaked out and crashed into the table,  sending a whole vat of chocolate across the room landing right on Constantine.

“I will forget the look on his face.” Leo sighed as he wiped a stray tear from his eye from laughing so hard.

“How pissed was your dad?” Anitah said through laughter.

“Very, he grounded us for a month.”

“Yeah, that was around the time I started sneaking out with Damien.” Leo leaned forward forking a chunk of chocolate cake he began lifting it as Alicia leaned down, taking it off the spoon. His jaw hung open on shock. “Gotta be quicker than that Rhys.” She winked and smirked. “She just. She just ate my cake, of my fork.”

“You can't leave chocolate cake around her Leo.” Anitah laughed.

Alicia scooped a spoonful of her chocolate mousse lifting it to her mouth, just before she reached her lips Leo leaned in his mouth inches from hers as he ate it off the spoon. He leaned back. “Two can play that game.” He gave her his signature smirk and sat back in his chair.

“Ok, ok. It's your turn the two of you.” Leo pointed at the two.

“Us?” they said simultaneously.

“Yes, you two. Time to spill some embarrassing situations. We've been doing it all night, it's only fair.”

Liam looked to Leo, and the two women.  “He has a point love, it's only fair. However we don't have time here.”

“So we go back to my quarters, have a few drinks and continue this party.” the 3 nodded in agreement and they headed towards the exit.

They walked out Liam with his arm around Anitahs waist. Leo walking next to Alicia. a huge grin on his face just as they were bombarded by flashes. The security detail held them off as Bastien hurried them to the waiting car. They slid and and speed away. Leo turned to Alicia. “pull out your phone and delete all of your social media, now!”

“What? Why?” Alicia looked at him confused.

“Alicia, he's serious do it now.”

“those photos they took, will be in all the tabloids and papers tomorrow morning. Their websites by midnight. They will find out who you are and your entire personal life will be at the fingertips of any person in this country.”

“He's not lying, when Anitah came here she had to do the same, until we were able to go in and make all of her accounts private.” Liam spoke sympathetically.

“Ok, fine. You mean everything?”

“Yes.” all 3 said at the same time.

Alicia went through deactivating all of her social media accounts. They pulled up to the palace Anitah and Alicia going to change, Liam and Leo heading to Leos quarters waiting on the girls.  

“So, what do you think the headlines are going to be?” Leo leaned against the table, taking a swig of his scotch.

Liam let out a sigh “Oh probably something about a double date. They don't often catch you out with a woman. And you were with Anitah and I.”  

“You're probably right. They are going to have a field day with this.”

“She's Anita's best friend, and here for two months. It was only a matter of time before they got to her. Anitah was warned about this, we should have debriefed Alicia.”

Leo snorted “Well, its done. They should be back any minute, lets not let this ruin our night.”

As if on cue Anitah and Alicia walked in. Anitah holding a bottle of jagermeister, Alicia a few cans of redbull. “We thought we could spice up this party a little bit.” Anitah grinned.

“Where did you get that? Liam tilted his head.

“The bar in the ballroom.”

She sat the bottle down on the kitchen counter and went over to Liam wrapping her arms around him.

“where's your shot glasses?” Alicia called over to Leo. He walked over to the dry bar pulling 4 out.

He watched as Alicia poured the dark liquor into the shot glasses. Filling each cup with redbull. “You ever have one of these?” he nodded his head. “Yup. Liam on the other hand, I don't think so.”

“well, this ought to be good then.” She giggled as she called Liam and anitah over.

“What do we do with this?” Liam questioned.

“Lets show him Nitah.” Alicia winked as the two dropped their shots into the cup of redbull and drank it down quickly.

“Fuck that's good.” Alicia whooped.

“Hell yeah, let's do another one.” Anitah high fived her. Leo and liam both shared a look and drank theirs down. A few drinks and shots later they were all laughing hysterically.

“Ok ok. What about the time I got pulled over going the wrong way, down a one way street.” Anitah giggled.  “Oh my god, yes when we left that party. Dude we were so wasted. I don't even know how you drove.”

“Anitah, seriously?” she waived him off.

“So did you get out of it?” Leo grinned.

“mmhmm, the cop that pulled us over took my license and seen my address.  He asked us what highschool we went to. Turns out his niece went there too and we were actually friends with her. He let us go.”

“Yeah after he told you to let someone else drive.” Alicia snorted, Anitah slapped her leg.

“oooh what about the time we snuck out to see nsync at the beach?”

Anita's face blushed bright red. “NO. Alicia.”

“Nope, spill Alicia. I want to know what kind of trouble my soon to be Queen was.” liam grinned, feeling tipsy.

“Well, we were in Atlantic city during summer vacation. Nsync was performing. My parents wouldn't let us go, but we scored tickets.”

Anitah looked at Alicia.  “I hate you so much right now.” She buried her head.

“Oh you act like you're the only one who was embarrassed. Anyway. So we snuck out and met up with a few guys we had met on the beach earlier in the week.” Alicia continued.

“kyle and Chris. They had a car and were hot.” Anitah added in.

" Anita!” Liam shouted giving her a stern look.

“Ok. So the four of us went to the concert. They had a convertible and some mad dog. We got drunk and ended up taking our shirts off down the highway. We pulled into a parking spot and we had a makeout session with the guys.  Only, we were in a parking lot of a casino.”

“Anitah! Seriously?” Liam shook his head, face reddening.

“oh god. Anitah buried her face even deeper.

“so. Clothing was coming off, things were heating up when we heard someone shout our names. Turns out my parents date night was at that casino and they were parked right in front of us.”

“Oh shit. How much trouble did you get into?” Leo grinned. “Leo!” Liam turned glaring at his brother who was clearly enjoying it.

“Oh that's not even the best part. they forced us out of the car, I tripped over the seatbelt and fell out on the ground,  boobs popping out of my bra. Anitah here, climbed out crying because she was so drunk and puked, all over my dad.”

“Anitah Elizabeth Brooks! That was horrible, irresponsible, reckless behavior.” Liam shook his head “Thank god you've outgrown that.”

Alicia busted out laughing, Anitah shooting her a warning look.

“So what did your parents do?” Leo said grabbing her attention.

“Oh. Well they didn't want to ground us because that would mean someone had to watch us. So, they made us wear full piece kiddie bathing suits the rest of the vacation, and my mom brought us long shorts and baggy tank tops. It was torture.” Alicia snorted.

Anitah placed her hand on Liam's thigh sliding it higher. “Anitah.” He groaned as her hand slid up his leg. “What my king?” she cooed as he leaned in kissing her.

“Im gonna get another drink.” Alicia stood up walking to the kitchen area. “I'll join you.” Leo stood following her. “scotch is gone, so is the jager and vodka.” she assessed the bottles on the counter. “Got anything else?” Leo walked over to the bar pulling out a bottle of gin.

“I can work with this, got any 7up?”

He shook his head “No, but i have a couple cans of lemon lime soda over here. She grabbed the cans tossing a few ice cubes in the glass, adding a few shots of gin, topping it off with some soda. She took a sip as Anita's shirt hit her feet. She looked over to see Anitah straddling Liam on the couch, his hands in her hair. She rolled her eyes. “How about some air?” Leo motioned to the balcony. “Get a room you two.” Leo shouted as he walked Alicia out onto the balcony.

He leaned up against the door frame, watching her as she leaned over the railing, loose strands of hair that fell out of her messy bun blowing in the nights breeze. She wore a pair of loose fitting sweat pants and a tank top, he had only known her for two days but he couldn't help but think how sexy she looked like that. “It's really beautiful, this view.” She broke the silence, looking straight forward. “Yeah, it is.” was he talking about the scenery or her?  He walked up joining her. “I spent most of my time running from here, from what was expected of me. But now.” He paused, looking out into the nights sky.

“Now what?” She turned her head to face him.  “I don't know? It's like, everything feels different. Better almost.”

“Did you really mean it when you said you'd take me out sightseeing tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I figure we get an early start.” She gave him a look. “ Ok semi early start.” he chuckled. “Maybe grab some breakfast.”

“Sounds good. Maybe we should go check on the two horn dogs.” she giggled.

They walked in, no sign of Anitah and Liam except her shirt. “Looks like they got a room.” she nudged him. “wanna watch some Tv?” He asked, not ready for her to leave yet. “Sure, as long as I get to pick.” she giggled running over grabbing the remote as she plopped down on the couch. She flipped through the channels until she found friends. “Ever watch this?” she asked. “a time or two.” He tossed himself down next to her. After a while she had leaned against him, making herself comfortable. Before he knew it she had fallen asleep. He laid her down,  careful not to wake her. He grabbed a blanket and pillow for her, shutting off the tv and went into his room, pulling off his shirt, and putting on a pair of pajama bottoms. He climbed into bed falling instantly asleep.

The next morning he woke up, He opened his eyes to a frock of brown hair in his face, his arm draped around her waist. Stunned as to how, or when she got there. He had left her on the couch, what was she doing in bed, with him. He carefully slid his arm off of her, she started to stir and then she rolled over. Her big Brown eyes locked on his bright blues. “Ah, good morning.” He cautiously said, not sure how she would react. She blinked a few times “Morning. How did, um what am I doing in your bed?”

“Good question.” He chuckled. “You fell asleep on the couch, I put a blanket over you and came in here. And I woke up, there you were.” they got out of the bed, and made their way to the kitchen Leo brewed a some coffee.

“I really don't know how I Ended up in your bed. I remember getting up to use the bathroom, and.” Her hand flew up over her face. “Oh god, I thought I was home, so I climbed into your bed. I am so sorry.”

“No, its ok I don't mind.” she gave him a questioning look. “not that I wanted to sleep with you. No, that came out wrong. I um, it was ok that you did, I just didn't want you to think I was trying to take advantage of you,  that's all.” He stumbled over his words smooth, real smooth Leo,  now she's going to think you're a creep.  “I don't think you'd take advantage of me. I climbed into your bed on my own." She gave him a look.

What was that look for? What did she mean by that? Did she want him to make a move, he was good at reading people, but when it came to her, his mind was cloudy.

A knock came at the door, Liam walked in. “papers are here, they think you're dating.”

Liam stopped dead in his tracks seeing Alicia sitting at the kitchen table. His head snapped over to Leo, anger written all over his face. “I didn't know you were still here Alicia. I wasn't interrupting anything was I?”

“Nope. I passed out on the couch.” liam took notice of the blanket and pillow. “I'm going to go shower and change, see you in about an hour?”

Leo nodded his head as she walked out.

“You're playing with fire here Leo. And she's the one whos going to get burned.” He tossed the papers on the table and left.

Tag: @annekebbphotography @carabeth @moneyfordiamonds @give-me-ernest-sinclaire @3pawandme @indiacater @ooo-barff-ooo @ownworldresident @tornbetween2loves @perfectprofessorherokid @stopforamoment @editboutique @wannabemc2 @zaffrenotes @enmchoices @lauradowning29 @lodberg @smalltalk88 @gibbles82 @heatherfilliez @drakesensworld @nikkis1983 @sweetest-marbear @classylady1234 @daniv2278 @jlouise88 @jared2612 @liamxs-world @notoriouscs @blubutterflyy @captain-kingliamsqueen @whenyourheartskipsabeat @lynne1993 @coldcollectornight08 @be-still-my-aching-heart @dcbbw

@kennaxval @hopefulmoonobject

[normal-thoughts-official]

Magnus and Queen

ok so i thought making the other post would get this off my chest but apparently it didnt so here comes

this post is non-queen-fans friendly

lemme just talk a little bit more about magnus' (Canon!!!!) relationship with freddie mercury cuz honestly i think they were just name-dropping but it makes so much sense i die

listen. LISTEN. magnus and freddie are so alike, its kind of unreal. both really powerful/glamorous/outspoken people who actually felt pretty lonely and were very closed off when it came to important things.

both with the same fashion style and love to break gender roles (particularly 70s!Freddie).

both big cat lovers.

both really Soft and romantic and nice but taken for divas and drama queens because of their effeminate styles.

both serial adopters of insecure kids (John deacon, queens bassist, has said multiple times that fred was like a father figure to him, helped him come out of his shell and feel comfortable in the band and always helped him write his songs. also most of freddie's exes or queer friends ended up living at his house or getting a position as like, freddie's "personal assistant" or "gardener" so he could help them on their feet - and magnus, well, magnus has adopted every single downworlder he managed to put his hands on).

both diplomatic peacemakers (all the queen guys have said on multiple occasions that when things got heated, freddie helped them figure out their differences and played the diplomat) but who also didnt stand for bullshit.

both had an "open house" policy (freddie would accept visitors any day and frequently took random people he met on clubs to his home. that's how he met his husband, jim hutton)

both really creative, admired, fierce people. both scared of being left behind and unloved. both queer men of color.

like listen theres just. so much they could bond over. so much they could share with each other. i bet their relationship was so good for the both of them

with all of that being said, i dont think they were like, boyfriends. theres many reasons for that; 1- magnus would have to hide pretty much his entire life from freddie; 2- i think magnus would at least avoid getting involved with a mundane; 3- magnus spent way too many years closed off to romantic relationships; 4- they were both kinda private when it came to The Important Things so i think that would put a wall between them should they try to have a romantic relationship

so I'm thinking - not dating, but not really friends with benefits either? something like friends-who-sometimes-bang-and-sometimes-sit-in-silence-doing-their-thing-and-sometimes-talk-all-night-long. intimate and close, but not really romantic. and they were fine with that

freddie and magnus would lowkey compete over who loved cats the most. it was never really explicitly said but whenever magnus would, like, get a cat some milk, freddie would give them fish, so magnus would pet them, so freddie would kiss them, and it kept going but neither would acknowledge what was happening

magnus had to have met the other queen members at some point, since they were all really close (like, personal-space-is-not-a-thing close, really, there are many pictures of them all just. sitting on each other's laps), and i think hed vibe with Brian May (queens guitarrist) pretty well

im thinking party because freddie loved to throw parties and magnus loved himself a good party and somehow he bumps on Brian and theyre both slightly tipsy and started talking and like. brian is fun (esp when hes drunk) so theyd get along well and somehow they found themselves at a quieter place just talking. im thinking by the pool just because brian would throw himself at the pool at freddie's parties jejdid

anyway they have a few bits in common if you look close enough. mainly, brians gender issues (his parents kind of raised him as a girl and hes always been like, slightly feminine. up to this day - hes 71 now - brian paints his nails and has long curly hair and wears androgynous clothing on his shows) and death issues (brian had a sister who died very young and it deeply scarred him. he has many songs that revolve around the idea of being the one who lives and having to watch your loved ones die. hes also struggled with depression and suicidal ideation for pretty much his whole life)

so like, ok, yeah, dark, but im not really thinking, super dark? im thinking somehow these topics come up and it ends up being like one of these honest conversations you have with strangers at a party when you're just the right amount of tipsy to be honest without being hyper-emotional or a crying mess. these conversations that end up going deep but dont really feel sad, feel more like "omg someone understands!" and end up being kind of fun

so they talk about these issues and get along pretty well and both come out of their conversation pretty satisfied. magnus didnt reveal anything he shouldn't, of course, but that conversation ended up subconsciously inspiring brian to write who wants to live forever

magnus kind of doesnt listen to who wants to live forever cuz it hits a little too close to home. but its a beautiful song

eventually, with magnus becoming the high warlock of brooklyn and freddie dating other people, they stop seeing each other. they dont really break up as much as drift apart, and, as many of freddie's exes, stay on pretty amicable terms

magnus never stops being a queen fan. hed still go to concerts, along with dot, and sometimes talk to the guys when he managed

magnus was totally that queen fan who liked the hot space album, and dot was totally that queen fan who despised the hot space album. these were the concerts that magnus "dragged" dot to (because i refuse to believe dot doesnt like queen. theres no such thing). theyd have heated arguments over it too

"its funk! its disco! its not queen" "oh, so you're telling me that queen, the band that mixed hard rock and opera, should stick to a single musical genre?" "im saying it doesnt have queens touch. i thought youd back me up on this, dont you think there could be more of an edge?" "darling, there can always be more of an edge. also, two words: under pressure." and even dot cant argue with the power of under pressure, but that doesn't mean she'll agree with him

queen is magnus' go-to band for many moods. they just have so many songs he can relate to (from dont try suicide to somebody to love) and also many purely fun, even silly songs he can dance/perform to and just feel. happy. he even likes most of queens not as well-known songs, like seaside rendezvous and lazing on a sunday afternoon

freddie's death shocked him. freddie didnt tell the press about his disease and they werent that close anymore at the time, so it hit him in the stomach. he attended the freddie mercury tribute concert and went back home feeling better and knowing that freddie lived a happy life

when he starts to miss him and wants to honour him, he listens to was it all worth it, to remind himself that yes, Freddie died really happy and proud of his life