#anyway im gonna keep making every character queer and/or in love and if that makes u upset ur a loser | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

call-me-chips · 2 months ago

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Hello fellow gay person on the internet. I am in a bit of a conundrum. so basically i figured out im a lesbian a few months ago and im generally not attracted to men at all. basically like i would actually want to romantically pursue women but i dont feel the same way about any man. That is with the exception of my best friend. Basically I know for a fact I care for him strongly very platonically, but his personality and looks are so perfect I keep thinking to myself if he was a woman I would definitely try to date him. Initially I was very nonchalant about it and only really wanted to cuddle with him and be besties but as its gotten colder and my options for women grow fewer and fewer I've found myself wanting to make out and uhhh do other stuff. I have now also gotten this idea stuck in my head that he is secretly an egg. I have literally nothing to substantiate this and the one time I brought up my own gender (im lowk transmasc) he kind of just said ok cool i respect gender also i think im asexual and that was it. anyways what is your diagnosis on this? am i only being attracted to him out of loneliness and lack of other options? is my brain falling for the fantasy that he's actually an egg and now only perceives him as a woman? or am i genuinely attracted to him and i misdiagnosed myself as a lesbian? This is very important and will inform how i move forward. Also I have had no indication he is attracted to me, let alone any other human being on this planet. Thank you internet gay person for your service. also love your art :>

Greetings, fellow internet gay person :)

Okay, ima start off by saying that I can't "diagnose" you with anything, and you shouldn't base your final decision of who you're gonna pursue in life by my word alone

I have no way of knowing how you feel for your friend, nor how deep these feelings go, but I know that I do occasionally find myself looking at men/boys and wanting/imagining a relationship, among other *things*. But for me, I think that's more out of curiosity and heteronormativity, rather than pure attraction. And since you said that you don't typically feel any attraction at all for men, neither romantically nor physically, this could be the case.

Another thing I want to bring up, is how I've seen a lot of lesbians saying that they have 1 or 2 exceptions for men they'd date. These are typically celebrities or fictional characters, but I think every lesbian has these. The most common I've seen are probably Thor and Flynn Rider, but I've seen a bunch more that I can't name rn. For me, it's gotta be Sero and Iida, along with a few others. So it's nothing uncommon to have some exceptions for men you'd date, and still be a lesbian. It really depends on what label you feel most comfortable using. Something I'd recommend doing if you're unsure is playing around with labels; use one for a month or two, then if you still don't really feel like it suits you, use another one for a bit, and so on and so forth. That's how I ended up with both my lesbian and agender labels. A few ideas for labels you could use are lesbian, bisexual, queer, polysexual, and a few others, so there is lots of room to experiment. You could also choose to just not go by any labels. Although most people prefer to have a label, you don't at all have to have a label for who you wanna smoosh your face against

Not sure if it's really gonna help, but here are the reasons why I identify as a lesbian, so you can see if you relate to any of this:

I find female faces and body types attractive, and I often find myself getting flustered when I see an attractive woman.

When I imagine my future, it feels wrong to imagine myself with a man. It just doesn't feel right, and it's not something I look forward to when I think about it.

I don't find myself attracted to men, physically. I don't find my eyes lingering on men in an attracted sort of way. Like, I don't find muscular arms or abs attractive, unless they are on a woman. I also often find myself getting visibly disgusted when I see men in "flattering" clothing.

Also remember that sexualities aren't set in stone, and can change over time. If you feel like identifying as a lesbian is right for you, do it. You can always change it later, and you shouldn't feel ashamed by it. Ik I have used many a label. I only started referring to myself as a lesbian a few months ago, and at least for now, I feel like this is right for me

Getting back to the topic of your friend, I have NO idea what you mean by "secretly an egg" xD

I know this can be annoying to hear when you want a definite answer, but these have to be decided by you, and they very often take a while to figure out. Ik I was trying to find an identity that I was sure of for over 2 years, and mine could very well change from now. So my advice to you would be just, take your time, do some soul searching, really think about it, and if you're sure of your feelings and you really feel like you would like to pursue a relationship with him, go for it. So what if your label changes? Being happy with whoever you choose to be with is all that matters

#I really hope this was helpful at all #Also I'm glad you like my art :)))#askchips #lgbt #lgbtq #lesbian #ask #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #queer community #queer discussions #lgbtq advice

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ruuufus · 6 months ago

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Ugh I rarely make posts anymore but something from Pretty Little Liars Summer School just gets me so upset.

Because in season 1 I really liked Noa. I thought she made a lot of dumb decisions, but she always seemed to have good reasons. And even if she didn't I understand their kids and gonna do stupid things anyway. But I feel like I'm being gaslit into liking Noas new girlfriend, Jen. Both on and off of the show.

And I didn't hate Jen to start. I was initially excited that Noa was queer. I dont like that we had to have another bi character discover her sexuality through cheating. But thats an issue with the writers and societies perception of bisexual people as a whole.

But the show is called Pretty Little Liars so I give Noa so much leeway in liking Jen. When Jen first stole money from their job I was like "Noa do better!" But I thought if thats the worst of it, eh not too bad.

But when Noa asks Shawn for $2000 to bail out her mistress the show started to lose me. But even then I was like okay they gotta have some drama for the end. But that also wasnt the end of it!

While Shawn is getting cheated on his mom finds out about the $2000 and rightfully demands it back. (Which Jen should've been making an effort to pay it back anyway, not just when his mom gets mad). And Shawn loves and trusts Noa so much that he gets angry with his mom. So Noa asks Jen to come up with the money. And what does Jen do? She robs Shawns house?????? Not only is that awful, but also incredibly stupid! You couldnt find any other persons house to rob?

And even when Shawns mom tries to tell him that Noa robbed the place, he doesnt believe her. He cant fathom that Noa would ever betray him like that. And yeah it was Jen not Noa, but Noa staays with Jen so as far as I'm concerned her name is cosigned to that robbery

And side note I don't even love Shawn all that much. His steroid arc in the first season was annoying, but he did not deserve this.

Finally Noa realizes this has gone too far and breaks up with Shawn. But she doesn't confess the cheating, manipulation for the bail money, or the robbery. Shawn at least figures the cheating part out (im not sure about the other two things) and goes to confront Noa, but finds Jen.

Jen, who he paid all of her bail. Then she "paid him back" by robbing his fucking house! According to Jen, Shawn yells at her and punches the wall. And for arguments sake we'll believe Shawn did everything Jen claimed (even though Jens a proven liar and manipulator).

No Shawn should not have punched the wall. But could you imagine discovering your partner, who you love. Who you defended time and time again to your friends and family. Who you gave a huge chunk of your savings to to help her mistresses with bail. And then that mistress breaks into your house and violates your home. So he has every right to be fucking pissed. And yeah he shouldn't have punched the wall (if he did), but he is also 16. Everyone keeps saying the girls are just 16, well so is he. Hes 16, and just found out the person he loves lied, cheated, manipulated, and stole from him.

And then Noa finds out right? And she absolutely destroys his car. Which is stupid! You have a criminal record girl. His mom hates your guts! But even then Shawn doesnt call the police. And by the way when confronted about the hole in the wall, the first thing Shawn says is "you're a liar."

But fine okay the show is called Pretty Little Liars, drama is the name of the game. I resign myself to holding out hope Jen will be less prominent or written off next season. Because I actually still don't hate Noa. I think she's being mad dumb, but I don't hate her. I do hate Jen (no hate to the actresses though).

Also the girls are supportive of Noa and Jen, only because they dont know everything! If Faran knew that Noa had stayed with Jen after she robbed Shawns house. After stealing from their job. Faran would be like "what the fuck, this isnt smart or good for you."

But where Im really feel like Im being gaslit is on social media. Because first off this isnt good representation to start. Another bi character who has to cheat to learn shes bi isnt good rep! So lets not act like it. But also The creators are working overtime to demonize Shawn on twitter to make me like Jen. And Im not ride or die for Shawn, but he was a lot better than Jen. Jen didnt have any reedeeming qualities. I was waiting for one. But the only time she is a help to Noa is when she saves her from bloody rose, and when Noa needs to hotwire a car. Which are both crisis situations. And if all shes good for is a crisis, then shes not a good partner!

My hope if we get a season 3 is that these problematic aspects of Noa and Jen are acknowledged and explored more until they break up. Cause I just can't see a way to salvage the Jen character. And no that doesnt mean I want Noa to get back with Shawn. Honestly, I want Noa to stay far away from Shawn and either be single for a while or get a new girl.

#pretty little liars #pll #pll summer school #pretty little liars summer school #noa #faran #imogen #tabby #mouse

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stormyoceans · 1 year ago

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Hiiiii, i am curious to know what do you think the last twilight will tackle in regards to the characters of mork and day? and what is something you want to see?

[TAKES OUT HER MANIFESTATION LIST] SO HOW MUCH TIME DO YOU HAVE ANON

no im just kidding.. i mean not about my manifestation list that could take hours to go through, that's very real, but im not gonna keep you here for that long ;;;;;; anyway, if we're talking about overarching themes that i think are gonna be in the show, there are actually some recurring ones that p'aof likes to put in his series and that i am pretty sure he's going to further explore with day and mork, such as:

money and social class difference;

family conflict and emancipation;

failed dreams and trauma;

moving on from the past and embracing the future;

taking responsibility for your actions;

communication and self-expression;

the concept of home.

i could honestly spend hours talking about each and every one of these, how they were depicted in p'aof's other series and how i think we're gonna see them being portrayed in last twilight, but this would get way too long, so to try to sum it up i'll just say that most of these are built on dichotomies: past vs future, traditionalism vs modernity, societal expectations vs the concept of self, it's not just the main love interests coming from two different worlds and colliding with each other that bring these contrasts to the story, but it's every relationship between all the different characters. we know that mork and day meeting each other is gonna change their lives forever, the two of them embarking on a journey that will help them regain their self-confidence and faith in the future, but this will also force changes on everyone around them. it's hard to talk about this since we don't know much about mork, but one thing im sure we're gonna get, for example, is a major conflict between day and his family when it comes to his disability and what is best for him

i have yet to mention disability as one of the themes that the show is gonna explore because i think it kinda goes without saying, but at the same time i want to point out that, in particular, i feel like they're really gonna delve into what being a queer person with disability is like and the importance of having the support of a community. maybe it's just a coincidence, but i find it curious that during the pride event in this week's episode of be my favorite we got this particular shot:

not sure if the nod to last twilight is intentional or if im just delusional, but i do believe we're gonna get to see this in the show

ANYWAY. im rambling way too much and idk if any of this makes sense ;;;;;; as for something i want to see.. uuuhhhh [looks for something in her list that she hasn't talked about yet] i don't necessarily want mork to go back to school and gain a higher degree because while i think education is important im not the biggest fan of how a person's value is measured only by how 'book smart' they are, however i do want him to realize his own potential and for day to be the one to push him into dreaming and wanting something for himself again, even if it's just.. idk getting a bigger garage or changing career completely and opening a restaurant or whatever

#..should have probably picked something more interesting for what i want to see ;;;;;;#and i definitely should have rambled less and actually talk more about how all those themes are going to apply to mork and day #sorry if this doesn't exactly answer your question anon!!!!#i hope it can still be interesting in some way tho and thank you so much for asking!!!!!#hope you're having a lovely weekend!!!!#last twilight the series #morkday #m: ask

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aqueeracademic · 2 years ago

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morse being queer (and other commentary) pt 15:

season 4, episode 3, “Lazaretto”:

- my expectations are really low for this episode

- the last episode was so aggressively gay i’m just assuming this one won’t be

- unfortunate but here we are!

- ew i hate hospitals

- i love old nurse uniforms though

- elite fashion tbh

- morse in a wife beater agenda ‼️

- of fucking course joan called him from a goddam pay phone

- i’m IRRITATED 🗣️

- my tv is glitching the fuck out

- fixed it!

- anyways

- the head nurse reminds me of the sister in fleabag and i always think it’s her but it’s not

- and that’s my story

- morse uses the same body language with debryn that he uses with women he’s attracted to

- i’m just saying 🤷‍♀️

- the way everyone looks at the parrot is so fucking funny

- we are barely ten minutes into this episode and we’re already headed to the armory

- NO BRIGHT NO

- anyone but bright.

- you can kill ANY CHARACTER

- bright killed a tiger tho i’m pretty sure he’s immortal at this point

- no because listen

- debryn is perfect for morse

- IM SERIOUS

- he comes to the hospital immediately out of loyalty to the precinct and also because he knows morse is there alone

- he immediately tells morse who is in the operating room and that the surgeon is talented and morse doesn’t have to worry

- and then promises to go see what’s what for morse so he doesn’t have to wear himself out

- and THEN he brings morse’s mind back to the case hes working on because he knows morse copes by working and wants to take his mind off bright

- debryn knows all the ins and outs of morse’s brain and respects every facet of him and works in favor of him every time without fail

- hes fucking perfect

- i love him

- everyone loves bright so much i’m sick

- the head nurse reminds me of the evil lady from chicken run

- i hate this lady caroline

- she didn’t really do anything wrong in this moment with morse but like

- you are the mother of the woman who broke morse as a human being and forever scarred his perception of love

- and then ur gonna brag about what her new man is doing? just to rub it in that he “wasn’t good enough” for her and still isn’t?

- despicable.

- i don’t even wanna promote the queer aspects of that even tho it would be easy to

- because that was just fucking cruel

- and morse deserved better

- it cannot be comfortable for bakewell to have his arm cuffed up like that for that long

- they should do it lower for sure

- justice for winnie ‼️‼️‼️

- i love her i just want her to be happy

- trewlove is so worried about bright

- bright and trewlove 🤞🤞 i love them

- “We were engaged to be married. And then we weren’t.”

- THIS is why morse is the most relateable fictional character ever to me personally

- because he SIMPLIFIES this sort of stuff

- he could tell the whole story

- say what transpired and why she left and what he did wrong or didn’t do wrong and who she’s with now and why he became a cop instead of pushing himself and being happy

- but he says this.

- we were and then we weren’t.

- because all human experience can be taken as that.

- we are and then we aren’t

- and it’s all very simple

- and despite all the pain he feels and all the ways it’s affected his life

- he knows it’s as simple as that

- THIS FUCKING SHOW RAHHHSHEKFOSK 🦅🦅🦅

- the way that nurse mills keeps side eyeing morse

- girl calm down

- the way morse runs 💀

- go morse go! 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

- thursday should not have left bakewell and i stand by that

- even though nothing happens someone should have stayed with him to keep him safe

- but noooo 🙄🙄🙄 thursday has to care about morse and make sure he’s okay

- morse just visiting debryn for fun at this point

- monica 🥺🥺

- JESUS THURSDAY

- slamming his head against the brick wall is so wild

- unnecessary some might say!

- perhaps even… police brutality!

- which you’ve been suspended for!!

- every time i start to like him 🙄🙄

- oh my GOD monica is so beautiful

- “treat the next one better.”

- GET HIM MONICA

- both of them avoiding the question “are you happy?”

- final straw

- the way thursday just hates having brights job

- it’s so funny

- thursday loves winnie so much i’m SICK

- i’ll prolly never get married but if i do i want it to be like them

- the way this show handles mental health issues is like

- actually not that bad

- like 8/10 times they do a really good job

- especially given the time period

- he’s a murderer and all but bakewell is funny as fuck

- “i get the uncontrollable urge to murder nosy parkers 😡. ta for the grapes 🥰🥰!”

- like ok??!

- funny as fuck

- that picture of joan is absolutely foul

- just throwing it out there

- “i had a reverse charges call from leamington.” “wasnt me.”

- i hate her right now

- i know i said i loved her like two posts ago but i fucking hate her

- like she’s intentionally hurting these people and doesn’t care

- like how does she just not care how much what she’s doing is affecting the people in her life?

- i know she’s traumatized

- but ONE phone call to ur parents wouldn’t kill you 🙄

- i have 0 understanding of how she’s blaming herself for the death at the bank

- they didn’t know who she was until he was already dead

- like girl get it together

- “i don’t care.” “i do.” “you shouldn’t.”

- GIRL SHUT UP ‼️‼️

- pissing me tf off

- anyways 😐

- bright is so 🥺🥺

- just a little guy tbh

- GIVE BRIGHT CHILDREN🗣️🗣️🗣️ (he’s like 80 years old do not give him kids)

- what is this trend of bringing grapes to people in the hospital? is that something i should be aware of?

- goddam morse’s ex is RICH

- the way that people don’t like dr. powell because they think he’s a ladies man but he literally just wants to be a doctor 😭

- let my man breathe!

- the way susan was sick TWO YEARS AGO and morse looks worried like it’s happening right now

- “have you spoken to susan?” “yes. i haven’t mentioned you.”

- girl shut your bitchass up

- sick and tired of your classist bullshit

- this guy talking to corpses is so 🤨🤨

- NO BAKEWELL‼️

- what the fuck.

- how on earth is dr. powell working from 7:30 in the morning until after 3 in the morning the next day

- how does he function

- stop 🥺 the way morse turns his back before strange opens the trunk and then just peeks over his shoulder to look

- he’s a fucking pussy 😐

- KIDDING

- i’m obsessed w him and i truly believe his inability to look at the deceased is his most endearing quality

- thursday cares about morse sm i’m SICK

- NAUR THEYRE PUTTING BRIGHT IN BED TEN

- morse talking to the parrot is funny as fuck tbh

- morse is obsessed w debryn

- how the fuck did debryn notice a microscopic wound on someone’s ass

- he’d have to be STUDYING that ass

- wild!

- anywho

- i love the way morse talks to debryn and debryn talks to morse

- just two geniuses bouncing off each other 🥰🥰

- trewlove OUT OF UNIFORM coming to visit bright is so sweet

- it’s like he has a daughter

- i’m obsessed ✋🙄

- okay i was wrong. powell is a terrible person!

- the nurses are dramatic asf tbh

- i cannot imagine real nurses behaving this way

- oh my god susan’s dad died

- this could be my breaking point!

- i also would love to point out the fact that morse insists on formalities in most if not all situations, meaning he refers to people as “Ms./Mrs./Mr. ____”

- but he calls susan’s mom “Caroline”

- just her first name and nothing else

- like he and susan were engaged to be married

- like he really loved her and she maybe really loved him

- like at some point her parents loved morse and took him in

- like they treated him like family

- like they were excited for him to marry their daughter and therefore let him call them by their first names

- like they were close

- like a family

- everything about what happened between him and susan HURTS and idk how to handle it

- also i FUCKING HATE CAROLINE

- “I’m so sorry.” “Are you?” “Yes, of course. Edgar was always very decent to me.” “Well, he always had a weakness for failures.”

- like YOUR DAUGHTER LEFT MORSE

- not the other way around

- i fucking hate classism

- there’s a whole other analysis i could do of this whole situation that would be about his queerness and how it could play into all this but i’m like

- i fucking hate caroline

- she sucks so bad

- like the way she tells him the CHIEF CONSTABLE RUPERT STANDISH said he would never amount to much

- which already is bullshit because of his involvement with landesman and wintergreen, meaning that he was involved with the group who intentionally sabotaged morse and are still attempting to now (he died in the neverland episode so it’s not him directly anymore but still)

- and then says “You didn’t even pass your sergeants exam!”

- which is bullshit because she doesn’t know what happened and he can’t defend himself because it’ll make it sound like he’s making excuses for what she’s interpreting as failures

- “You see, I was right about you, even then.” “When you speak to Susan please give her my condolences.” “And your love.” “No. No. Look, whatever you may think of me, I am truly sorry he’s dead.”

- the DISGUST on his face when she says “and your love”

- i fucking hate her

- and morse deserved better

- it’s obvious that what happened is still tearing him up even now

- and that’s why he’s so sensitive about people leaving him (jakes, joan)

- and why he will always assume people he’s in love with or carries any love for are going to leave

- i fucking hate this show ‼️‼️

- two female murderer episodes in a row i am running my hands together like a little mouse

- this girl is wild for killing that many people tbh

- morse hugging her instead of dragging her away ☹️

- he’s so gentle i HATE IT HERE

- thank fuck bright lived

- idk how i would have reacted if something happened tbh

- i cannot believe the only shot we get of susan is from the back 😐

- okay for you tarot kids!

- intersecting the tower card with the death card usually has a lot of negative meanings. it represents suffering, typically by means of illness or pain of some kind

- the death card is a typically pretty happy card despite the connotation, but when combined with the tower card it’s p shit

- the tower card usually represents suffering or destruction

- combing the two cards doesn’t bode well for morse and it’s our first intersection in the reading we’re getting at the end of these episodes!

- so far we have sacrifice, union, and now a traumatizing ending of something resulting in suffering

- things are not boding well for our boy!

#it is four in the morning #i have to be up at 8 #oh well #for the people! i shout #no one is listening #endeavour #endeavour itv #endeavour morse #morse #itv endeavour

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goblinrockcandy · 2 years ago

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hey guys im BACK baby and i have some words

here are links so you can still find everything, but be wary that these links are probably gonna break any minute when i start moving everything around. lets hope i can remember to fix them and that i dont take a year to get to doing that: ARCHIVE MY ART OTHER ORGANIZATION TAGS

IM STILL ALIVE. i like to think that i never rlly left, but I havent posted in a damn while and part of that is because life stuff caught up with me and moreso because uhhhhhh Well im not quite satisfied with the way my blogs formatted right now, it makes posting and organizing and navigating harder than it has to be and it makes it Not Fun to post things.

SO. what we're gonna do is revamp things a lil bit. we're fucking doing this we are Making It Happen. what this'll do is itll make it easier for me to post things without having to remember every silly tag and rule i have set up here, and ill also just have a bit more of a laid-back and fun kinda art blog. i tried to do an elaborate tagging system, but MAN i am too forgetful for that.

so im just gonna keep it simple. character, fandom, content warnings, and maybe some other flavourtags. the sorts of things thatll make it easier for me to just pop up a quick drawing on even a busy day without having to go through a silly step by step process on how to tag things. because i love sharing my art and posting :)) but not so much when it is difficult </3

but hell who knows how thisll go after i reboot my bloggo. i think she was due for some maintenance for a long while. *pats the sidebar like you would soothe an agitated horse* there there girl, its gonna be alright. maybe ill even start making... casual posts? text posts? things like that??? damn Maybe.

im also gonna private some organization posts until i can properly wrangle then and sort out their kinks and oddities, and im gonna disable my blog theme for a bit. when i get a braincell on how to do an html and a css properly, THEN i can have a pretty theme. in the meantime, ill probably just set myself up with one of the tumblr defaults.

anyways. *ahem* for anyone who doesnt know me and this is their first stumble upon my blog while i move things around. feel free to click the read more if you want to subject yourself to the silliest introduction i could make for myself possible.

hi. i like to draw but lately my art skills have been a bit shakey, i think im out of practice so im probably gonna start out doing some studies. my styles and designs for characters are always changing, but lately ive been trying to cement some designs that are in my brain Onto Paper.

im goblinrockcandy but you can call me GRC if that's a mouthful (thats what i call me because i do not have time for 5 syllables). im a Knight of Heart and sometimes that gets shortened to KoH and so sometimes people call me koh. now KOH is also the chemical formula for potassium hydroxide, but no one calls me that (a real shame, it flows right off the tongue and i think its a lovely set of sounds), but potassium hydroxide also goes by another name and that is lye. so sometimes people call me lye. i don't have a name so if you want to refer to me you have to get creative or pick up my blog by the scruff of its handle like a really ugly cat and point at it and say "this motherfucker right here".

same goes for pronouns. my pronouns are none/applicable. you gotta BE CREATIVE if you want to refer to me... pronouns are a crutch. they were your training wheels and now im the final boss. you have to fight me with your other words, this is what you have been training for.......

im trans queer person of colour, painfully unfunny and addicted to bad jokes, and i love homestuck. my faves switch up every once in a blood moon but right now i really fuckin love jake english. you might have discerned that by the very subtle hints of I talk about Him all the time & dirt striber avatar.

#announcement #intro post

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communist-cat-girl · 2 years ago

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i wrote way too much shit so ima paraphrase what made me block someone a minute ago

if someone rewrites a story and makes the characters gay, thats fine if you think doin that shows that you have “gay blinders”, just block me

if youre mad about that, keep readin. if you dont wanna read, block me. its a bad faith take thats on par with “representation is pointless” and “i wish modern media would stop shovin gays down my throat” type 4chan shit

if you dont know what i mean, be thankful! its a pointless bit of discourse that doesnt matter to any real world person except queers online who want to gatekeep every aspect of bein a queer. be gay and free, fuck these hos

“just because its gay doesnt mean its better!” feels a little bad faith? like ya, its obviously not necessarily better, but the thing is ... im gay ... so i have a vested interest in if whether or not they get together; not to mention it recontextualizes stories as one’s of aggression against oppression (if they werent already) that makes me doubly interested as an anarchist.

if we look at, say, Alice Isnt Dead we can see this in full swing both ways. not only is the core audience and creative team behind Welcome to Nightvale openly supportive or queer themselves, so too are those who’ve worked on Alice Isnt Dead. Not only does this mean that the queer audience will feel catered too but the queer staff will be more likely to *want* to work on this, to put their whole ass into this project and make it better than if they were just paid to make some mlw piece of media.

and would the mlw idea rly work when the end of part 1 and all of part 2, spoilers by the way, of alice isnt dead are about the gov’t doin absolutely everythin it can to keep them apart and how *keepin them apart, even as alice is part of this shadowy institution, didnt make them happy and didnt solve the wider problems of the world anyways*

im sorry, but if that story wasnt gay, if its gayness didnt put into focus the issues real gay people face, then that story is ostensibly weaker, its prose less profound, its themes less touchin

now, to talk about the post that made me want to write this ...

im not gonna link it or even directly phrase it, i dont want anyone comin onto me or comin onto anyone else over this (not like my small follower count would)

the tldr is that, the hades and persephone myth is ... well, its kinda shit. its a kidnappin, its a possibly a sexual assault, its a woman forced into a bad circumstance; and so if you made this myth wlw and say its better you “have blinders because its gay” or somethin; which ive never heard anyone suggest EVER but sure, whatever

disclaimer, i am a hellenic pagan, more specifically of roman traditions, so my opinion on the *story itself* is complicated. so im not gonna be sayin much about that.

what i really care about is how somone brings of the Hades Game and i *think* lore olympus retellin where persephone is kidnapped, lowkey on purpose possibly, and eats of the pomegranate to like ... get at her naggin mom, or w/ever. thats not actually the story of the Hades Game nor of the more popular modern helpol retellin but its close enough.

the person who relays this paraphrased story says that if its wlw its better than it would be if it was mlw (and, in gnrl, this retellin is far more palatable to a modern audience; which isnt even rly debateable) and the person complainin say somethin about “gay blinders” says “no it wouldnt be” and a cry emoji.

now, ignorin how ... perhaps accidentally homophobic that comes off as ... like ... it would. mlw forbidden love doesnt really strike the same chord like it used to. in a time of arranged marriage and loveless lives, this concept was REALLY important and was the framein of most myths about a couple in the Mediterranean durin antiquity. problem is, these days, while expectations are hard even for mlw couples, youre still largely goin to get reluctant parents go “*sigh* fine, you may”

and unless youre under a rock you may have forgotten that us fags have a habit of gettin shot for lovin who we love

so ya, the story of forbidden love between a fem hades and a sapphic persephone bein a story of gay love in which they fight against all odds and become happy with each other is substantially more *touchin* (and thus “better” in the common parlance) than the same milk toast mlw forbidden love thats been shoved down queer people’s throats since day one of our birth.

whats rly annoyin is that op doesnt explain WHY “gay blinders” are such a bad thing anyway? is it genuinely so bad to enjoy gay stories more? to see yourself represented in a piece of media, esp one that you already connect so strongly too?

the worst outcome is “because its gay people think the story is good” but ... i dont think anyone is confused about the story of hades and persephone anyways? like, the ancients werent fuckin morons. zeus was a tyrant king and a story of how despots, even one’s who gain it thru noble means, will inevitably abuse their power. athena was dedicated to protectin women but when a woman needed her most she turned her into a fuckin monster. hera, in her hetero jealousy, harms WOMEN more than men when it comes to vengeance because she believes *the harmful actions of men against women are the fault of women.* and WHO suggests that the ancients thought otherwise?

do you think they would be allowed to spread such horrific and grotesque tales without approval from religious or political authorities if this was not an intentional and integral aspect of their faith? is it not curious that most ancient writers dont rly talk about these tales but only speak of the gods in a Vague sense? is it not curious that the details are obfuscated? ignored? its because while the gods love us and care for us they are also fickle and jealous and violent and they must be, in the ancient view, respected OUT OF FEAR

they clearly understood that these were representations of natural causes (a commonly held belief by ancient philosophers) and so their stories show that the natural outcome of things like LIGHTNING STORMS or EARTHQUAKES happen to everyone because the world is just Like That Sometimes; givin names to these causes just makes it easier to explain them. it helps them figure out the Shape of their trauma, far easier than the existential horror that we experience in our hyper objective world of today

so no, i dont think your modern liberal minded fag is gonna go “oh hades and persephone is so romantic” and even helpols on this site pretty famously go for the stories that resonate more with them on a personal level than the ancient stories men told other men to make them feel good about bein men

yes, even if the story is about two gays

if you think a story is bad on a personal level and think gayness wouldnt solve it ... Okay. thats subjective, movin on.

if you think its bad because makin it gay is a superficial bit of representation, im sorry you live a borin life? all representation is superficial then, if you wanted to be that kindve a jerk about it.

if you think makin it gay harms the original script, im sorry to tell you that oral history has changed most scripts so beyond their original form that we will NEVER be able to know that that original story was (and very likely, from an anthropological point of view, the origin of these stories could be as old as 5 to 10 thousand years ago told in different times with different gods and different circumstnaces; we will NEVER know the original story)

changin the story to fit your modern sensibilities and makin it gay is not bad, dont let anyone tell you otherwise. it even might make the story infinitely better! who knows, who cares! write what makes you happy, fuck these hos

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idontwanttowhy · 1 year ago

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Review: Love to Hate You (2023)

A rom-com for the 2020s

Synopsis

Yeo Mi Ran is a woman of many talents. She's a street-smart fighter, a sharp lawyer, and a notorious pick-up artist. She only uses her powers for good though, so when she crosses paths with the famous actor Nam Kang Ho, she can't help but make him fall all over her (*wink wink*). Though they are both determined to believe that the other is intrinsically evil based on their gender, they are forced to fake date when Kang Ho's career is put on the line. Will their prejudices keep them apart, or will love prevail?

MZ Overall: 10/10, so fun, WHY was it only 10 episodes!?

I knew in the first 5 minutes I was gonna love this show. Something about seeing Mi Ran break up with a guy when she catches him cheating WHILE SHE IS ALSO BEING CAUGHT CHEATING is so... right. I'll admit I was a little shocked to see how quickly things were progressing between the leads, but when you realize it is only 10 episodes, it does make a lot of sense. My only gripe is that I wish it was longer! There is a ton of physical comedy which the actress portraying Mi Ran, Kim Ok-vin, nails. If you want something that will get you actually laughing out loud, this is your show.

MZ Review (spoilers!): If I had a nickel for every time my favorite drama had the main female lead be a stunt double, I'd have two nickels - which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice, right?

I'll say off the bat that I decided to watch this show because Netflix told me that the main female lead was a stunt double. My alarm bells started going off because one of my top favorite dramas of all time is Secret Garden, where the main female lead, Gil Ra Im, is a full-time stunt double. I said to myself, "self, you need to watch it... just in case." In case of what, you must be wondering. Well, me too... Just in case...

...Anyway, one thing about me is I'm going to make everything about Secret Garden. I definitely enjoyed this drama because it works so well just as it is (which AC will be able to tell you in her review). But I saw a commentary recently that pointed out its faults as a commentary on misogyny that really got me thinking about rom-coms as a genre. I disagree with the author on a lot of points, but I realized that a key difference in our disagreements stems from where our analytic focus is. That is, I'd argue that our focus as (re)viewers should be on what Yeo Mi Ran and the women around her are doing, not on Nam Kang Ho and the himbo CEO Do Won Jun. If we look at how both main male characters develop, all we are going to see is misogyny because that is pretty much all they are able to do. Patriarchal society does not allow for men to develop a critical consciousness about gender dynamics as much as it does not allow for women (and queer people, for that matter) to participate in its systems equitably. The game is rigged!

I'm not going to sit here and say that the show is unproblematic or that the author of the commentary is completely wrong. But I think there is a reading of this show that takes into account how it uses the rom-com genre as a vehicle for feminist commentary that is at least self-aware, though not necessarily subversive. This makes me bringing up Secret Garden perfect, because it is a near-perfect foil for Hate to Love You, though both are squarely within the rom-com genre.

You see, Ra Im, who is a full-time, life-long stunt double in Secret Garden, spends her life being pushed around on film sets and pining over the director of their action company. She is in relation to three other women: her roommate/best friend, her "love rival," and Kim Joo Won's mom. So at least two are adversarial, and for the best friend's part she does her best to make sure she helps Joo Won in his quest to harass Ra Im into a relationship.* Obviously we've come a long way from when this was made in 2010, but if we look at the same sort of character set up for Mi Ran, we can already see important differences. For instance, they set Mi Ran up with a Barbie-esque range of skills and jobs, from crime-fighting ability to lawyer-ing. The organizing impulse behind most of what she does is a strong sense of justice, especially when considering gender-based inequities in society. Her core set of women includes her best friend/roommate, her mom, and her first client (who was also the reason that she got hired at her firm at all). All of these relationships are based in mutual respect; when Mi Ran does encounter women she disagrees with, such as her "love rival" and Kang Ho's fan group, she is not there entirely as Kang Ho's lover, but as someone who is trying to be herself and have a relationship. She goes out of her way to not be defined by her relationship to men, though over and over we see that this is inevitable, even for someone as savvy as her.

The key imagery that makes this comparison between shows made 13 years apart is around when the female lead gets a serious injury (because of course this has to happen). Gil Ra Im, in the very first episode, is robbed of agency in her decision to go to the hospital for her arm, instead whisked off by Joo Won. She is belittled by him and her stunt director for not being more careful or for looking out for herself and her health. This is supposed to be the romantic part, because oh look, both of these guys like her so much that they are getting mad at her. Swoon? When we look at Mi Ran's case, it's almost inverted. Firstly, rather than her injury being a complete accident (which Ra Im's was), she intentionally put herself into the fray when she saw a (potentially fatal) accident about to happen. When she took a fall and was taken to the hospital, she was heralded by everyone for saving so many people. Well, everyone but Kang Ho, whose ideology did not account for a woman being able to make a decision. But instead of being able to whisk her away wherever he wants to take care of her, he has to beg her to stay in his room to look after her. So here, the romance comes from hearing him over and over try to argue that he should be there to look after her after she saved his life. Swoon!

I'm not going to continue these comparisons, but my examples speak to how the creators of Hate to Love You are (presumably) using the moments that are expected in these dramas as points for reorganizing the power dynamics between men and women. Ultimately, its goal is not to say that rom-coms in general are problematic, but that there are a lot of dynamics that are. I mean, the leads still end up together, and we still have a lot of the same beloved shows of affection that are characteristic of rom-coms. I think Hate to Love You just does so in ways that poke fun at the expectations rather than subvert them entirely.

I think the ending brings together a lot of the societal-level commentary. For example, Mi Ran, far from regretting her decision to date a lot of men, fully tells someone off saying that at least she did her due diligence in finding someone she really likes rather than trying to make it work with someone she didn't trust. We even see that at the end, she doesn't "learn a lesson" that what she did by dating a lot of men was wrong. Rather, she learned that public opinion is more often going to rule in favor of patriarchy than not. This is even seen in the final scene with Choi Soo Jin, her client, who comments that there were more reporters when she was being accused of cheating on her chaebol ex-husband than when her name was ultimately cleared. So the commentary on misogyny, rather than pointing at the interpersonal level between Kang Ho and Mi Ran, is actually pointing at the societal factors that organize relationships between men and women.

This got a little meta, so I'll conclude by saying the key point: This rom-com is not about men. They are there, they are problematic, and they are (regrettably) in charge of many aspects of life. I think this drama has done a really good job of creating a hilarious commentary on all of that, while highlighting Mi Ran's relationships with other women. While the men in her life may view her as "not like other girls," she herself is a staunch defender of womens' wrongs, as much as their rights.

*This sounds harsh but I really (really) love Secret Garden. I can be critical and still love it!

AC Overall: 9.5/10, so fun!

UGH! It's been a long time since I enjoyed a kdrama THIS much. I, sorry to say, had forgotten kdramas could *actually* made me blush and laugh OUT LOUD--often! I had to stop myself from bingeing the whole thing So. Many. Times. It was short and sweet, full of funny moments and a romance I actually rooted for?! It's good from first to last ep, and from the cast to the production to the direction, everything was *chef's kiss* damn near perfection. There was such attention to detail in the scenes and camerawork, I just...AND Teo Yooooo! So so good in this (as in everything else I've seen of his--officially a fan). Truly a "modern" kdrama rom-com, updated to better fit today's viewers' appetites while still employing the tropes we know and love. If you want a more mature enemies-to-lovers, relationship contract, and a not-so-typical female lead, give it a shot!

AC Review (spoilers)

I feel like I don't have much to say, MZ really nailed the whole this-is-not-perfect-and-it-was-great-two-things-can-be-true-at-the-same-time-thank-you-very-much thing I had planned, and the connection to Secret Garden that I didn't recognize has only strengthened my views of this drama. One of the things I liked about Love to Hate You was the theme of respect that ran throughout: Mi Ran sought to bait disrespectful boyfriends who were cheating on their partners, her friend Shin Na Eun demanded Do Won Joon respect Mi Ran after seeing the contract (and because of this Won Joon respects Na Eun), Kang Ho repeatedly said how much he respected Mi Ran as a person, and then there's public opinion/respectability politics...the list could go on. For me, what made the romance so pleasing was Kang Ho's fully realized attraction to Mi Ran--more than the basic I-like-you-because-you've-cured-me, or you're-not-like-other-girls feelings he starts with. He actually sees her for who she is and loves her for it (and played so well by Teo Yoo, his emotions were palpable and portrayed in a different way from what I'm used to from male leads in kdramas). SWOON!

My cringe moment: the talking and touching Kang Ho does while Mi Ran was thought to be asleep TWICE was...not cute. Did not appreciate that. And yeah, more could've been done to subvert and blah blah blah....but you get what you come for, and many come to kdramas for those tropes, right? Not a huge deal, and--this drama is a step in the right direction?

#kdrama #k-drama #kdrama review #k-dramareview #kdramareview #kdrama recommendations #love to hate you #secret garden

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oceanwithouthermoon · 1 year ago

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i always considered saiki aro, but you make me really rethink with kubosai. .

THATS SO LOVELY, i know you didnt ask but.. im going to take this opportunity to talk a little about my stance on kubosai and saiki's sexuality.. i mean i have talked about it multiple times but still, lots of people dont see what i see in these things sooo im gonna keep talking about it lol..

(under the cut cuz i made this WAYYY longer than i meant to, sorryyyy..)

i still see saiki as aroace personally !! just not romance repulsed aroace, rather just on the aroace spectrum.. i think hes the type of person to use 'queer' and 'aroace' as umbrella terms for himself instead of caring about specific labels, but if i had to, i would say he fits best with demi based on my interpretation.. (i usually see him as with no preference, but based on the text its easy to see him as having a preference for men too..)

i do get why people would see him as romance repulsed and its a lovely hc, but i see saiki as mlm, at least in the way i interpreted it.. i mean, he almost straight up says he has a crush on satou in the manga.. its great if people interpret it as a 'squish,' but i personally dont see that,, he kinda blatantly threw them in a romance chart together, blushes every time he sees him, etc. HOWEVER aroace people who relate in some way and project their experiences onto saiki will ALWAYS be valid, so i dont care !! i literally do that lmfao im an aroace lesbian,,

anyway, saiki has a lot of silly tsundere moments that lots of people who dont really look at the show past surface level (and usually dont read the manga) see as him literally hating his friends, family, romance, etc when its very much shown how hes being a tsundere and he LOVES his friends, family, AND romance.. (canonically loves romance not as in he definitely experiences romantic attraction, but as in he just is weirdly into love stories and such but wont admit it lmao, i talk about that chapter where he gets obsessed with those strangers love story he saw with psychometry but its just so good lol..) so i think that misinterpretation is where a lot of the discourse in this fandom comes from, like people who think he GENUINELY hates teruhashi ? they r literally best friends he cares about her so much..

kubosai is a ship i started loving, not really from seeing their canon interactions, but from analyzing the characters in the manga and seeing who i think would actually fit together and have a good dynamic..

im very weak for characters who are ashamed of their dark past, afraid of their own strength and that they might hurt the people they love, scared to tell their loved ones their secrets, etc.. and kuboyasu and saiki fit the bill perfectly, so i looked at them and immediately thought BOOM what if they were in love..

their dynamic is fun, even though we didnt get a lot of canon interactions.. theyre so similar yet SO different at the same time..

they both have pretty tragic pasts and family lives, both VERY protective of their friends and family and would do anything for them, both have bad coping mechanisms (mostly refusing to acknowledge that anything is really wrong at all), etc.. and yet, theyre almost opposites in the way they actually carry themselves..

saiki appears apathetic at all times in front of others even though his internal monologue or how he expresses himself when hes alone can be really emotional.. kuboyasu is pretty happy all the time even though he has pretty thinly veiled anger about half the time..

kuboyasu is just a human boy who was taught to take up as much space as possible for his survival, defend himself with his fists, honesty and loyalty and trust are essential, etc, while saiki is an almost-god whose upbringing taught him to try his best to take up NO space at all for his survival, dont get involved unless its from afar, dont get close with anyone, dont trust anyone, etc..

saiki prefers to protect his people from in the shadows, going as far as to literally stalk them to make sure theyre okay without their knowledge, while kuboyasu is unafraid to show how much he cares and prefers to literally come out swinging to protect his people.. put them together and you get two silly guys who will literally protect the other with their life despite knowing damn well that theyre both fully capable of protecting themselves..

kuboyasu is also like.. one of the only people in the cast other than saiki who can be like.. a voice of reason sometimes.. he would be so good for saiki and would make damn sure he knows when hes being irrational or dramatic (because cmon, its saiki.. hes such a drama queen all the damn time..) and i just think he needs that in his life..

yasu would reign saiki in when it comes to his everyday dramatics, and in turn saiki would reign yasu in when it comes to his over the top romance standards (and probably his anger issues and overreactions too..) and yet at the same time they would take comfort in each others silliness.. saiki may be like "we cant just drop out and get married, thats not how it works" but isnt it so refreshing for him to have someone that cares about him so unconditionally ?? unlike his own family ?? itd scare him at first, but hed make yasu tone it down to a healthier extent and itd become soo comfortable..

#im so sorry this is so long omg.. u do NOT care..#didnt wanna project too hard mid-post so i didnt mention how i see him as autistic but i'll say it here real quick lmfao #im an autistic aroace lesbian and i relate so hard to him lmfao.. him saying he doesnt UNDERSTAND romance felt so like me with my autism lo #tried very hard to phrase this so people wouldnt think im calling romance repulsed saiki hc a misinterpretation #people who thinks its canon are misinterpreting but the hc is valid and wonderful <33 #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusuo #kuboyasu aren #kubosai #meows post #meownalysis

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delphi-shield · 4 months ago

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i was gonna comment on this when I got home but I couldn't stop rotating this fic in my mind after rereading it again so im doing this on my lunch break instead lmao.

It was sweet. Ashley had kissed boys before, but never a girl. Jill’s lips were softer, not just in their composition or the way they sat on her face, but the way she kissed. It was nicer. Ashley was so engrossed in the kiss that she almost didn’t notice Jill’s hand on her cheek. The kiss probably would’ve lasted longer if they weren’t being gawked at by two men, and maybe ten more if you included the agents patrolling the area.

sorry im on mobile this might look wonky-- anyway!! love this fic so much.

She hadn’t heard of other sexualities before. It was 2004. It wasn’t like people talked about those things openly, not even on popular parts of the internet. Where was she supposed to read about bisexuality, pansexuality, asexuality, and the like? The gay newspaper? Ashley didn’t read the news. She barely had time for her own life, let alone anyone else’s.

this is really important to me and it's one of the things i like about this fic (and most of your fics tbh) the most. while i understand the appeal of fics where characters are gay and no one bats an eye, where everyone is secure in their sexuality and it's not a source of stress and i think those are valuable and important, i really prefer when authors grapple with the reality of being queer, especially in the early-mid aughts. i think the end result winds up being much more engaging and its got more stick-with-you. even without getting super deep into it, without delving into angst about it, i really feel like this bit of realism & stepping back to look at the time period and the characters logically adds a lot to this fic.

This holiday season she would not be followed around by reporters because the Secret Service was ordered to keep them away from her. Yeah, it’d suck to be surrounded by a group of men with a grouchy disposition, but at least they didn’t talk. They were practically allergic to conversation.

there was a lot to unpack in here but I bolded my favorite lines so as not to fill this comment with me just going "AHHH". love love love how much characterization you're able to pack in here for ashley. your writing here is very efficient - which i mean in a positive way, im a big fan of economical prose.

also oh my goddd I could go on about your use of the secret service in this fic. i don't know if it was intentional or not but they make a fantastic metaphor for comphet. i really enjoyed the occasional reminder that theyre still there, still watching, even as ashley is exploring her identity.

L: “You’re in luck :)”

A: “XD”

Ashley then had to go on to explain to Leon the concept of XD and XP. They didn’t cover that in all the paramilitary training he’d gone through.

canon to me tbh. ashley really is an xD enjoyer. idk i want to introduce her to kaomojis, i think she'd die.

“Hey Ashley. You look great tonight.”

“Thanks. It’s Versace.”

“I don’t know what that means, but I take it it’s expensive.”

honestly I don't have anything intelligent to say about this exchange i just wanted to point out that i liked it. Ashley's def the kind of person to get a compliment and go 'omg thanksss it's [brand]' and Chris has got big 'ok 💛 yay 💛' energy here.

The moment Leon turned away to retrieve her refill, Ashley said, “You’re really pretty, Jill. I mean, your dress, it’s really pretty. I like it.”

this is suuuch a cute little moment to me, i like how you've written Ashley's fluster and i love her using her status to show Jill around and kind of show off. Idk ashley really feels like she would try to like flex her status when she's flirting if that makes sense?? so offering to show jill around and being like "I can get us in >:3" felt very her.

And I also love what's essentially your case for Jill/Ashley! ashley doesn't have a ton of people to talk to about her experience, certainly not people who get it, and tbh, yeah, leon's pretty tight-lipped about it whereas i don't think jill has anywhere near that level of reticence to talk. idk jill's very action-oriented, and leon's prone to sitting and stewing in all the bad shit so while i think jill's eager to offer a shoulder she's also prone to withholding on her own end -- anyway. this ain't about them. what i'm saying is i really enjoyed the case you made for jill/ashley lmfao.

this is THE paragraph in the entire fic to me. she's that girl. idk I think there's something special about your first kiss with a woman, especially when you're coming into your own identity and accepting your feelings. I think this really captures it succinctly and beautifully.

and omg theres my besties the secret service mentioned again, hiiii. i really love the persistent reminders that they're being monitored as well. again, i don't know if it's what you intended but it really does add a lot to this portrayal to me.

there's a lot of little details about this fic that I love tbh, but especially jill's hesitance to chat ashley up at the beginning. idk the fear of seeming predatory is so real and like you didn't have to spell it out, it just kind of clicked. I would devour any wlw fic from you tbh.

make the yuletide gay

pairings: ashley graham/jill valentine, leon kennedy/chris redfield

cw: everyone is gay :), fluff!

summary: jill is ashley's gay awakening

ao3 link

The first time Ashley met Jill was at one of those galas that posed itself as something celebratory but was really intended for diplomacy and networking. As the president’s daughter, her presence was often requested by her father at such events. She wasn’t a part of any government agency, so it wasn’t like anyone would find her attendance beneficial in any meaningful capacity, but it was good for her father’s image. It made him look like a family man. Not that he wasn’t a family man. He was just busy. Ashley made an attempt to attend these things for the most part in the hopes of gaining her father’s respect or at least, his attention. She knew there were only a few routes to her parents’ praise and this was one of them.

On top of that, Leon was going to be there, and she hadn’t seen him since Spain. When she’d thanked him on Ada’s jetski while they watched the island go up in flames, he’d said “don’t mention it”, but she was definitely going to mention it every time she saw him for as long as it took her to properly express her gratitude. Her infinite gratitude. Ashley assumed that Leon didn’t like her based on his standoffishness, but when she’d approached him about it soon after they’d made it stateside, he told her that he just wasn’t really an affectionate person. He learned to accept her hugs slowly, but surely over the years.

As it turned out, the brooding air he carried was typical of most anti-bioterrorism agents. That late-2004 night Ashley met other agents from the DSO and the soon-to-be BSAA, not that she knew much about either organization. Most of the agents were male - the strong, hardened type. People that could realistically kill her in one punch. She was constantly watching her back after Spain, so she felt safer knowing that she had dozens of Leons in the room.

There was one agent that would put all others to shame: Jill Valentine. The coolest of cool. All of the men around her were either infatuated with or terrified by her, sometimes both. Ashley personally just admired her. Her confidence, her power, her beauty.

Ashley went for a stylish little number that night, wearing a designer dress that cost more than most people’s rent for the month, but still, she was not on Jill’s level. It was nothing to do with money or prestige because Ashley, as the president’s daughter, had more wealth and status than she knew what to do with. It was about coolness - an intangible, ineffable quality.

Leon introduced the pair with the typical “Ashley this is Jill, Jill this is Ashley”, and Jill went in for the handshake, not a hug like most of the women in the room. Most of the women weren’t Jill, though, they were all somebody’s wife or somebody’s daughter, but Jill was somebody. She bridged the seemingly impossible gap between woman and operative with a feminine chivalry in her handshake.

“Jill seems so cool,” Ashley remarked to Leon once they were alone again.

“Yeah,” Leon said, not quite as fixated.

Leon knew the look in Ashley’s eyes way before she did.

“Looks like someone has a crush,” he teased.

“What?”

“You’re staring at her, Ash. I wouldn’t be surprised if cartoon hearts replaced your eyes.”

“Shut up!”

Yeah, Ashley was blushing, but it wasn’t because Leon had actually clocked her. It was just an embarrassing thing for him to point out even if it was false. Which it was.

Then again, when she mulled over the night in her mind that night, Leon’s comment refused to leave Ashley’s head.

I’m not a lesbian. I like guys, so I don’t have a crush on her, she thought, I can’t have a crush on her.

It wasn’t that Ashley was homophobic. In fact, many of her friends from school were gay and she’d gone to the pride parade in DC that past June. She wouldn’t have a problem accepting herself if she were a lesbian. But she was pretty confident that she wasn’t.

The holidays were coming up, and if you know anything about America, you know that Christmas at the White House is a big deal. December is basically a month-long party. When she’s not being held up by the press or forced into a photo-op, the parties can actually be kind of fun. Ashley’s the kind of girl who communicates only by Christmas carol beginning December 1st. Initially, it seemed like the 2004 holiday season was not going to be so cheery. Every news outlet needed their fix of “post-Spain president’s daughter is A-OK” content. But since she’d gotten home, Ashley’s father had become more protective of her, maybe out of guilt, or maybe out of love. This holiday season she would not be followed around by reporters because the Secret Service was ordered to keep them away from her. Yeah, it’d suck to be surrounded by a group of men with a grouchy disposition, but at least they didn’t talk. They were practically allergic to conversation.

Leon texted Ashley to let her know that he’d be coming to one of the many, many celebrations planned for that December, to which she replied without thinking, “Do you know if Jill’s coming?”

L: “I don’t know. Do you want me to ask her?”

She could hear Leon’s teasing tone through the words on her screen.

A: “No!”

L: “Okay.”

A: “I mean, you can if you want, but don’t tell her I asked.”

A few minutes went by before she received another message from Leon.

L: “You’re in luck :)”

A: “XD”

Ashley then had to go on to explain to Leon the concept of XD and XP. They didn’t cover that in all the paramilitary training he’d gone through.

As soon as Leon made it to the party, Ashley was gushing to him about Jill, not that she’d admit it was “gushing”. Ashley went on and on while Leon sipped his champagne in relative silence. Free champagne was always the best tasting. It might have been the alcohol giving him a buzz, but he did start to feel a little bit warm inside listening to Ashley’s ramblings.

Little did either of them know, Jill was having a similar discussion with Chris across the room.

“She’s totally into you,” Chris insisted.

“Really? You think?” Jill tried not to stare, but it was hard not to when Ashley was twirling around the room with tinsel lighting up her hair.

“Everyone’s into you. You’re like the most badass woman ever.”

“I think you might be projecting your thoughts onto ‘everyone’, but thanks for calling me a badass, I guess.”

Jill patted Chris, her personal cheerleader, on the back.

When Ashley left Leon’s side for a moment to talk to whoever had just arrived - Leon was exhausted and not really paying much attention to names - Chris approached him with a conspiratorial look on his face.

Chris looked around the room to see if anyone was listening to their conversation before leaning closer to Leon casually to whisper, “Ashley’s totally into Jill, right?”

“Oh yeah,” Leon confirmed, “but she won’t admit it.”

“Jill’s convinced that Ashley’s straight, so she won’t go, you know, chat her up.”

“Even Ashley herself is convinced that she’s straight.”

From afar they probably looked like they were chatting about women they wished they were man enough to hit on, whispering and pointing vaguely at the two girls. No one would know that they were matchmakers in the making.

Ashley returned to Leon’s side, forcing the two men to put their conversation on hold.

“Hi Chris,” Ashley said with a smile.

“Hey Ashley. You look great tonight.”

“Thanks. It’s Versace.”

“I don’t know what that means, but I take it it’s expensive.”

“Very.”

Jill, who’d gotten caught up at the bar ‘mingling’ with some government officials, rejoined the group. Chris took her by the shoulder, pulling her into the conversation.

“Leon and I are going to go get another round. Do you ladies want anything?” Chris asked.

“Just got a brand new one myself, so I’m good, thanks,” Jill responded, holding up her full champagne flute.

“Ooh. Can you get me another one of these?” Ashley asked, thrusting her glass at Leon.

“What is it?” He looked at the pinkish remnants of liquid contemplating its contents.

“Just tell the bartender ‘it’s for Ashley Graham’ and he’ll know.”

Ashley, herself, wasn’t quite sure of the exact recipe, though it tasted like it had more than a hint of grenadine in it.

The moment Leon turned away to retrieve her refill, Ashley said, “You’re really pretty, Jill. I mean, your dress, it’s really pretty. I like it.”

Ashley’s cheeks were pink, realizing that she’d said something a bit more flirtatious than she’d intended. The drink must’ve had more alcohol than she’d thought because she was already making a complete fool out of herself, or so it seemed. It was true, though, that Jill’s dress was really pretty, a subtle blue, that complemented her blue-gray eyes, eyes which Ashley was trying not to get lost in.

“Thanks. I wanted to wear a pantsuit originally, but I was told a dress would be more ‘festive’.”

“You could totally rock a suit.”

“You seem to have a good handle on what’s fashionable these days, so I’ll keep your advice in mind.”

“I just read a lot of Cosmo and Elle, you know.”

Jill nodded, pretending to know about fashion magazines.

“Have you seen the Blue Room yet?” Ashley asked, hoping an exclusive White House tour would be enough to impress her.

“No, I haven’t. Are we allowed back there?” Jill didn’t care much about Christmas decorations, but if she got to spend time with Ashley, then she could pretend to be interested in whatever Ashley liked for a little while.

“I am,” Ashley said proudly.

“Is this an offer for a behind-the-scenes tour of the White House?”

“Yeah, I can even show you the Oval Office if you want.”

Ashley looked back at one of the Secret Service members behind her who only glared back.

“Okay. Maybe not the Oval Office,” Ashley said. Then, leaning over, in a whisper, “They’re a little on edge tonight.”

“Who?”

“Secret service. Otherwise, I could probably convince them.”

“Are they following you around?”

“Yeah, my dad doesn’t want any reporters hounding me about Spain, and neither do I.”

“That makes sense. People don’t really take into account how traumatic an experience like that can be and don’t even realize how insensitive it is to constantly be asking questions.”

Jill followed Ashley out of the ballroom, completely forgetting about the men they’d left at the bar. Who needs men when you’re getting a tour of the White House from the president’s daughter who is almost impossibly beautiful. Along with her designer dress, Ashley was also wearing tinsel in her hair and a necklace of battery-powered string lights. It was actually quite fitting that she’d put a flashing rainbow on around her neck. If her actions didn’t say ‘I’m gay’, her accessories sure did. Jill would’ve thought the ensemble looked tacky on anyone else, but Ashley managed to make it look festive, maybe even avant-garde. Though, fashion terms weren’t her area of expertise.

In the corridor, Ashley turned to face Jill, “They put all these articles in the news saying how happy they are that the president’s daughter is home safe, but they don’t even treat me like a human being when they talk about me.”

“I’m sorry you had to go through that. After Raccoon City, I remember constantly being asked questions about everything that happened, and I couldn’t even remember most of it. I passed out for days,” Jill said, trying to be sympathetic without raining on everyone’s parade.

Ashley’s holiday spirit surprised, yet delighted Jill. Knowing what Ashley went through, she would’ve expected her to be bitter or closed-off, but she retained this vibrance and sweetness that was charming.

“Wow. I don’t know that much about Raccoon City. Leon brought it up once, but he didn’t say much, and I didn’t want to ask him.”

“Yeah. There's solidarity between all of us who went through stuff like this. A silent solidarity, but it’s there. Especially silent on Leon’s end.”

Ashley had gotten to know Leon well over the course of those past few months, and yet, he was still a mystery in many ways.

“He’s definitely the quiet type. Sometimes I wanna open up to him about the whole thing, you know, Spain, but I’m sure he’s the last person that wants to talk about it.”

“If you ever feel like you need someone to talk to, I’m always here for you.”

“Really? That’s so sweet of you.”

“Of course. I’ll give you my number.”

Ashley couldn’t help but notice how the hundreds of lights strung around the blue rooms’ Christmas tree reflected off Jill’s face, how she glowed, how she was far more beautiful than the angel that took its place on the top branch of the tree. There was a moment of peaceful silence where she stretched out her pinky finger, not even realizing what she was doing until she felt the tip of Jill’s pinky touch her own. Similar to the moment before someone kisses you, where it becomes inevitable, the slow rush of butterflies to the stomach, but with an added tenderness, a sense of sweet innocence.

Leon and Chris appeared near the entrance to the room, but were stopped by a Secret Service member. Ashley had to step in with a, “they’re with me”, before the two men were allowed to be within 100 feet of her.

Chris, ever the opportunist, spotted an ornament on one of the many Christmas trees in the room, and swiped it. It was mistletoe shaped. He dangled it above Ashley and Jill, causing Ashley to blush and leaving Jill to be the one to initiate the kiss.

Jill deftly snatched the mistletoe from Chris’ hand and dangled it over him and Leon. Chris seemed surprisingly receptive to the idea, but Leon, on the other hand, looked a bit nervous. He cleared his throat and tried to hide the pink rising in his cheeks.

Hey, at least the blood wasn’t going anywhere else in his body, right?

Ashley held in her giggles while she watched the event unfold. Jill continued to hang it over them both, letting them know there was no way out.

“C’mon Leon,” Chris said.

Leon rolled his eyes, but he seemed to enjoy the kiss he and Chris shared.

Jill and Ashley were caught in their own little world, barely paying attention to either of the men, when they rejoined the conversation. They both slowly retreated once they realized they weren’t going to receive the attention of either of the women.

“Do you think they’re offended that we were ignoring them?” Ashley asked.

“No,” Jill said, “I think they get it.”

Get what? Ashley thought.

Jill’s lips were on hers again and she understood ‘what’.

At some point, the two noticed guests beginning to file out at a more rapid rate - people always came and went, but now the party was wrapping up. Jill looked at the clock and realized how late it was.

“Oh, wow. I didn’t realize how late it was.”

“Time flies when you’re having fun, right?”

“Right. I should get going, but I hope I get the chance to see you again soon.”

It sounded like a question that Ashley didn’t know how to respond to except with a ‘yes, absolutely, please and thank you”.

She said, “Yes, I have your number, so I’ll call you, if that’s okay.”

“Sure.”

Pulling away from their goodbye hug, Ashley kissed Jill on the cheek without really thinking about it. Luckily, before she had the chance to be embarrassed, Jill kissed her back.

Jill was leaving the room when she turned back to Ashley and said, “If you see Chris, tell him I left. He follows me around like a lost dog sometimes, so I don’t want him to get confused and end up roaming the halls for the next few hours.”

“Will do,” Ashley said with a smile.

She did start to wonder where Chris and Leon were. She hadn’t seen them in quite a while. Since most people had left, her security loosened her leash a bit, and let her wander off on her own to some extent. She eventually found Leon and Chris making out in an otherwise empty room. As much as she thought Jill might like that story, she was sworn to secrecy.

#fic recs #jill valentine x ashley graham

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pl4st1c---h34rt · 2 years ago

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Honesty i love Stranger Things like im obsessed but season four, volume 2....man. Idk how im gonna recover. idk how the duffers are gonna revive the show like. Tbh the only reason i'll watch season 5 is to see how it it turns out. Anyways here my rant. SPOILERS FOR SEASON 4.

Theres so many things to adress but ill start with eddies death. He litterally died for no reason. The bats wouldnt of reached the creels house before the three killed vecna. And also, steve got attacked buy bats while SHIRTLESS and all he needed was a little first aid but eddie died within minutes of being attacked!? I dont understand why the duffers keep adding in new loveable characters and then killing them off. Because they are scared to kill of the main cast?? Because they are scared to change the plot and make the show different?? Its so annoying. Also. Joe and gaten had to film their bits on a different day cuz joe only had 10 minutes to film his. Like how messy is that. It (his death) was was so rushed and unnecessary. Why did no one mourn eddie except for his uncle and dustin?? No one cared. No one spoke abput him. Mile probably doesnt even know man. And one last thing. Is he in the Upside down??? They just left his body there? It was bullshit.

Why did the duffers say they were gonna adress wills sexuality??why did they ASSURED us that would happen. That we would finally have an answer. But NO. The duffers are scared to actually include more than one queer character/relationship and its annoying. They queerbaited us and used will to make a straight relationship 'stronger'. Why cant they actually have will as a actual MAIN character?? Like he doesnt really have any other character traits other than he is a scared, traumatized boy whos been kidnapped by monsters. Idk i feel like he needs to actually have more recognition. They also have completely ruined Mikes character. In s1 and s2, he was a caring person. He cared for will. He could tell when he was having an off day and would comfort him but im s4 he cant notice will SOBBING while sitting right next to him??? His ily speech was so...bad. it wasnt powerful or moving and didnt deserve the praise that it got.

In this season, i was so so so annoyed with lucas and ericas character. He plays basketball and cares about it even though NEVER showing an interest in it at all??? And erica... i love her character but there has been no growth. She is still has like that sassy stereotypical attidude that every black girl has in movies. Why hasnt she moved forward? Why???? Like they both have no character growth and are SO stereotypical Also. When that older white jock guy tackled her to the ground and jason held a gun to lucas's head-OH HELL NO. BITCHHHH.

Also stancy. Bitch its so annoying. It happened 2 years ago. I thought he was over her. In my opinion, its so toxic for steve. Nancy fucks up then steve has to apologise. At first i shipped it in s4 but then i started to think about it and now i hate it. Like the kids that steve said talk was lowkey weird and also idk i just hate it.

I love argyle but why is his only personality traight getting high. Hes also stonned and once again i feel like its a stereotypical thing. Like the only brown person is a stonner?? Its annoying. Why cant he be like the others where he is smart and isnt ALWAYS stonned ???

Steve was completley out of character v2. He barley spoke a WORD to dustin, he didnt hug him before he left to fight vecna, he thought he was inlove with nancy, he let robin run around in the UD by herself and he didnt address eddies death???? Why do they do this.

The duffer brothers successfully managed to ruin their plot and characters in just four hours. Please make it better. Ill find more stuff to rant about later.

Bye

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littlx-songbxrd · 3 years ago

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Ok I meant to answer you're question about what I thought of the show ages ago but I forgot.

I LOVED IT OMGGGG! I got so many kitty vibes from Wilhelm and Simon! The touching! The softness! It's those vibes exactly! I want that energy in TWP.

COMRADE SIMON!! We stan! That speech he made at the very beginning about the differences in attitudes towards "tax evasion" vs. "Welfare fraud." Legend behavior.

Sara!!!! My girl!!!!!! An autistic/adhd character PLAYED BY AN AUTISTIC ACTRESS!!!! THIS IS SO HUGE!!! I would die for my problematic queen. I made an entire post on her but the gist is, I get where she's coming from and understand why she feels the way she feels but dear God girl make better choices and stay the hell away from August.

Speaking of.... I wanna run August over several times. Vroom vroom motherfucker. The fact that he

- filmed MINORS HAVING SEX AND TGE POSTED IT ONLINE

-kissed Sara behind Felice's back when they were still dating WITHOUT HER CONSENT BTW

- Wanted to blame Simon for the drugs because he knew it would be easy because Simon's family is lower class and doesnt have the same social standing as one of the "members of the society"

- Also it didn't escape my notice that the cult like faternety type group with all the rich, mainly white boys is called The Society. This shows commentary on class is vv interesting. Especially the little things like two girls just randomly advocating for THE DEATH PENALTY. The rich people audacity.

-Anyways back to August, when he tried to excuse his actions with Wilhelm and get all teary like no bitch you can't manipulate your way out of this one. And again with Sara! When he said "Wilhelm has everything" I wanted to scream! Like he's fucking closeted and clearly suffering from panic attacks and extreme anxiety you moron.

-Anyways!! I also think that Wilhem might be autistic because he just feels autistic. Like the vibes are there.

- The girl group is so sweet? And to have the popular girl be a Black girl who isn't "stereotypically attractive" with a more medium sized body and bad acne. As someone who has really bad skin I needed that. Felice is kinda awesome imo.

Let me see what else??

-Simon and his mom speaking Spanish consistently throughout the show. It sounded pretty natural to me? But I'm not a native speaker. (Or even fluent honestly lol.)

- Simon and Wilhelm are honestly so adorable and in love and it made my heart ache. (I am so touch starved I swear..)

-My only main beef is the outing plotline and the show using an outdated medical term for Sara, aspergers. It's literally just autism. Also it's kind of offensive because Hans Asperger was a n*zi who literally killed autistic children because they weren't useful to capitalism. SOOOO yeah.

As for the outing plotline, I feel like the cishets have like three plotlines that they use for queer stories. Outing/coming out, one of them dies, or one if them bullies the other until they both fall in love. It's tired.

But overall I really loved it.

HI SORRY I HADNT REPLIED

I wanted to correctly talk to you about this series so I logged in through my computer to make it easier for me :D

LOOK AT THIS POINT IVE RELATED THEM TO LITERALLY EVERY COMFORT SHIP I HAVE LIKE. I've compared this to kitty, I've compared this to Thomastair, I've compared this to my friends to ocs who she has obsessed me with (youd actually like them if you liked this tbh) IVE COMPARED ME TO MY OCS

BUT AT THE END OF THE DAY I JUST LOVE THEM

IF KITTY DOESNT HAVE THIS ENERGY IN TWP WHAT WAS THE POINT

what was the point cc??

S I M O N

OH GOD WHEN HE SAID THAT I WENT OMG YEAH

new favorite character

Great

SHES PLAYED BY AN AUTISTIC ACTRESS?? Sorry I hadn't known! Haven't actually gotten to obsessively look at the cast I've been trying to get over the last episode BUT THATS SO COOL. SARA IS AMAZING AND I ADORE HER. I'll read your post after this! But of course STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM AUGUST GIRL PLEASE

Tbh I understood where she was coming from with everything with Simons image falling apart and her having to suffer when she had just started having friends , just after finding he had been lying to her. But love, AUGUST?

A U G U S T ???

WHO JUST FOUND OUT OUTED YOUR BROTHER

Also random and stealing this from @marzzinaa i totally hc Sara as a demi girl for some reason

Im kinda sad we didnt see her speak spanish as much we did simon :(

But oh well I LOVE HER AND YEAH STAY AWAY FROM AUGUST GOD

FAE WE RUN HIM OVER TOGETHER BROOM BROOM

You already said it all, I just agree

Ok I'll bring a machete you bring whatever you wish and we kill him sound good?

ALSO YEAH I TOTALLY NOTICED HOW THE ECONOMIC DINAMICS CAME INTO PLAY AND HOW IT BASICALLY LET YOU KNOW HOW THE PRIVILEGED ELITES COULD GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING

meanwhile they wanted to pass off to Simon who came from a lower class family the blame

Also I'd like to mention how that would also play into the stereotype latinos are all drug dealers

Which I love how they didnt make his dead beat alcoholic man the latino parent, when I first read the description I thought they might do that, but im so glad they didnt

I think it might have been a comentary idk i liked that they DIDNT make the poc parent the dead beat

THE FRIEND GROUP WAS SO COOL AND I LOVED ALL OF THEM AND YES FELICE WAS JUST <3

I love how they didnt make her stereotypically perfect AND YES MID SIZED REP WAS AMAZING TO SEE

Also im so glad you got to see that represented!!

So I am a native speaker and him talking to his mom MADE ME CRY

it was WONDERFUL I WANT MORE OF IT

pls most her phrases reminded me to my own mom

Autistic wilhelm you say?? omg tell me more (if you want)

Oh thats awful, well I'll just refer to Sara as autistic and hope the showrunners fix that next season because if they dont-

Yikes

Oh yeah, thats valid critisism. But in my opinion they actually wrote it pretty well so I wont really be complaining about an overall media problem with queer stories rn. If so I'll be here all day. But yeah its an overall problem but it wasnt done bad in my opinion so!

I'll shut up, for now

IM SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT FEEL FREE TO KEEP TALKING ABOUT IT WITH ME PLS ITS MY OBSESSION NOW IM GONNA BE ANNOYING ABOUT IT ALL MONTH

#young royal spoilers #young royals

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gaylonelydyke · 4 years ago

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if it’s not too late, 12 for episodes and ships, and 17!

its never too late! thankyou for the ask 🥰 oo damn this is gonna be a hefty one, just to prepare you this is gonna be long 😅😅😅

spoiler alert for my friends who are finishing up season 2 rn, be careful if you look at my top five episodes, pay attention the the episode numbers, i will put [ ] in bold at the beginning and end of spoilers!

12. Top 5 ships

5. faith x myself because have you seen faith? shes such a babe! spare consensual kiss maam?

4. willow x oz, i dont know if this is an unpopular or not but i feel like if the 90s had been more accepting of term then willow wouldve been bisexual, but like even now tv shows will rarely let characters say that word :( but anyway i love them! theyre both quirky and kinda awkward but its such a sweet relationship and you really see how they go from awkward crushes to an actual deep relationship, oz is one of my favourite characters too what a dude!

3. giles x jenny, mlmxwlw solidarity in this bisexual couple! there is no an ounce of straight between them and i love it, i love their dynamic, i love that giles *respects women* (im staring daggers at xander rn), also the original girlboss x malewife couple askdjaksjhd

2. drusilla x spike, these two!!!!!! once again a bisexual couple with zero straight between them, the vibes are off the charts. sexy vampires, goth x punk love, i just love them man, and their relationship is so interesting to delve into. like theyre vampires, theyre soulless and yet they have a capacity for love, they care deeply for eachother, theyre so tender towards eachother in season 2 in the way they take turns to care for one another, also drusilla picking spike up with one hand made me gay and thats on that

1. willow x tara!!!!! lesbians man lesbians! they have a beautiful relationship, until a certain point wink wink, they feel like a perfect match, willows become more outgoing due to buffy and xander snd having a proper group of friends, so its cool to see her as the more outgoing independant one in the relationship, and tara is such a honey 🥺 the biggest sweetheart in the world what a babe!!!! also like how groundbreaking was their relationship? as a queer couple, they had p much the dame amount of screentime as a aueer relationship today! and willow says the word lesbian so many times and is always making gay jokes which is something shows today are too scared to do, its honestly refreshing which is weird for a show in the 90/00s

12. Top 5 episodes

this is so hard because its such a damn good show so i had to rlly be picky about this but here we go

5. 6x22 ‘grave’- i watched buffy for the first time last year at work coz i worked with one other person just packing shit, and THIS was the episode that made us cry infront of eachother. the scene with willow and xander at the end is one of my all time favourite scenes and like legit we were watching and we starting going like ha.. this is so sad Q_Q and we looked at eachother and we were both crying akdjdjsjdhs its SO GOOD, like this is a friendship ive been so invested in and [seeing xander be able to pull her back from that dark place was so heart wrenching and amazing god its so good]

4. 3x12 ‘helpless’ - im finishing up s2 in my rewatch rn so i havent rewatched this one to double check but i remember loving it man. buffys father daughter relationship with giles is my favourite of the whole show they make my heart ache, so i love that this is an episode that really shows you how dedicated giles is to her, [its the breaking point where he finally disregards the fact that hes a watcher and acts as her father once and for all, its a turning point for their relationship where he is finally embracing the fact that shes like a daughter to him and i just love to see it Q_Q get you a dad who will leave his lifes calling for you]

3. 4x22 ‘restless’ - season 4 is interesting coz it has really good episodes and them some gd awful ones 😂😂 but this one just blew me away, i love a good character study episode and this is THE SHIT! its so weird and creepy but in the most perfect way, its not on the nose its so subtle, it feels like an uncanny valley version of buffy almost, i like that they finished the season first and then took this episode to do something out of the box and different i feel like it lets them fully explore this idea without the pressure of needing plot included. [also the cheese man is iconic. dont however like xander being all nasty with willow and tara but whats new there man]

2. 1x12 ‘The Prophecy Girl’ - for my first watch of buffy i wasnt that into the first season, like i enjoyed it but i didnt think it was anything super special? but this episode changed EVERYTHING for me. up until now buffy had been fun, witty, charming, but not anything new atleast for me, maybe in the 90s it was but right now its your average teen supernatural show. but this episode!!!! the emotion! buffy facing her death, her speech about how shes just 16 and shes scared and she doesnt want to die, that is what i wanna see!! its heartbreaking and it made me cry, and then it gives us the wonderful moment of giles trying to take her place and buffy realising that she has to be the one to do it, man its so good! basically anything with buffy and giles being a duo is gonna make it an automatic yes from me and this is indeed the case for this episode, i just love that the show remembers that shes a child! shes not brave all the time, shes not strong all the time, shes just doing her best and sometimes its overwhelming, 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 i bow to this episode

1. 2x17 ‘passion’ - i know i just sang praises about prophecy girl but THIS EPISODE IS THE SHIT, the best episode full stop. i wont accept any argument. angel is probably my favourite big bad, its so funny to see plain bread, mopey brooding angel become this charismatic, funny, poetic, blood thirsty angelus, hes everything i want in a villain and in this episode he delivers! rip jenny tho love her. i think the tension built around angel is so good, because of his drawings and notes left around, every scene youre worrying like is he here now? are they safe or what? its so tense! and also it is me and im a slag for buffy x giles father daughter moments and this episode fucking delivers! giles discovering jennys dead body is probably one of the best scenes on the show, the dramatic irony is heAVY, we know jenny is dead, we know that these flowers arent from her, but giles is so so happy, and i want to see him happy but you just know somehing horrific is about to happen and damn does it. its a masterpiece! i love jenny and giles so much it is so sad, but also the fact that it gave us that scene makes me almmmoost ok with it? i also love the moment where giles breaks down in buffys arms, hes been there for her and now shes returning the favour and hes accepting it i just 😭😭😭 also on a different note, angels narration of this episode is amazing! it gives us great insight to who he is as “evil angel” and like even though hes awful i was also kind of rooting for him coz hes just such a great villain

sorry this is so long lmao, last question!

17. Which characer do you wish had less of a focus on them in the show?

i dont wanna get yelled at butttttt i dont like the amount of focus on dawn. i think it makes sense for the her first season considering the story arc but that season really does double down its focus onto dawn and buffy and it barely leaves room for anyone else to have a storyline, it keeps the episodes super depressing too its like a constant level of just sadness the whole time because we’re so stuck in THEIR arc, theres no room to balance it out and have a breather, some people might like that its more serious but i really really didnt like, i love episodes like prophecy girl where it is campy and brings the more emotional notes in when the time comes, but dawns whole arc is just constantly depressing the whole time i just hate it, and also just shes not a character i felt i could connect to because of how suddenly shes introduced, so its weird to have her SO focused on in the first half of that season coz we dont know her yet so i feel like the emotional moments dont land the way that they should? basically they shouldve eased us into dawn or introduced her differently and maybe i would like her enough to want the focus on her but i really just dont

adksjakjshd apologies for the essay this is, thanks for the ask!

#btvs #buffy the vampire slayer #why did i write a paragraph for everything im so sorry #i wish i knew how to add a read more link but i dont on mobile #my post #dawn fans please dont murder me #i dont hate her i just dont like her yanno #i am scared people are gonna hate me for not liking her but we all have our tastes

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pettyprocrastination · 4 years ago

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queer and feelin longing emotions and thinkin bout shortcake and the harleyyyhhh: when she first sees you shes like 👁👄👁 speechless, How could you possibly get hotter??? ure driving into frankie's driveway because you all are carpooling to meet the guys for a night out. she meets u in a daze at the end of the drive while youre taking the keys out of the ignition.

"i didnt know you owned a motercycle" she says, her face growing warm while u kick out the kickstand.

"oh um, yeah! i do!" you say with a nervous chuckle; your heart always races when youre around shortcake, but you've never seen her look at you Quite like this.

"why do i never see you riding it?" she asks, glancing down every so often as you absent mindedly start fidgeting, rubbing ur hands against the seat and the handle bars.

"ummm, i really only ride it when i need to think on some stuff or when i need to calm down," you explain. "its also really impractical for days i have a certain way i want my hair to look" u chuckle as u unclick the buckle to your helmet and hope, as youre taking it off, that your helmet hair isnt unseemly today.

"is everything okay? have you been on edge lately?" she asks, her brow furrowed. you smile at her but it doesnt quite meet your eyes.

"a little, but i'm working through it" you respond, you grasp the handle bars a little harder, u hadnt meant to let That slip.

shortcake seems unsure but after a moment she reaches out to gently lay her hand atop yours and u loosen ur grasp. "is there anything i can do to help?" she asks softly, kindly. you feel so Seen, so Loved; shes only touching your hand but you can feel the warmth of it through your entire body. "i'll uhhhh i'll let you know?" you leave it open ended, because you dont Think its possible for her to help you with your growing feelings....But you Never Know. the answer seems to appease her, for now at least.

youre together in this moment quietly, contently, a single innocent touch and your gaze at one another are all that connects one another to the present. you hear the front door of the house open and shut, you both suddenly move your hands away; the self depricating thoughts, quickening heart rates, and warm faces are all that you share now.

"hey, nice to see you bringin the ol girl out for a change" frankie says while walking towards the two of you. he raises an eyebrow at you, "you good?"

you nod, "i will be." he nods back, knowing. that sometimes you arent ready to talk about what thoughts ail you.

"oh hey your hair is a little..." he starts, moving his hand up to you head before stopping, "can i uhhh-" "oh yeah sure, thanks" you say, quickly. as frankie messes with your hair, you feel your stomach do flips and shortcake admires how sweet you look together.

he steps back admiring you- his amazing skills as a hair stylist, "better than ever" he says with a grin.

"oh wait hold on, you missed something can i just real quick" shortcake says, searching for consent. you nod you head at her and now she hands taking back stray pieces or smoothing out others. you shiver slightly as she tucks your hair behind your ear? you arent sure she actually moved anything that time. frankie is watching the two of you intently; he loves the careful way she tends to you and the way your eyes flutter shut every so often.

she moves back, and says "there, now we're good" with a soft smile. frankie smiles at her and gives her a quick peck on the cheek, "i love your attention to detail," he says, adoration in his eyes as she giggles.

"thanks," you whisper. you dont want to ruin this moment with your feelings butting in; they are so happy together, you wish so desperately you could make Them that happy.

frankie pats his pockets until he finds and fishes out his keys, "i'll go start the car, you can set your helmet inside the garage if you want?" he offers. "that'd be great thank you," you say, unstraddling the bike and the couple, unbeknownst to the other, watch a tad too intently as you do.

shortcale shakes herself out of slightly inappropriate gaze and decided to walk you up to a garage, "i've never ridden a motercycle before, it seems like fun" she says, just to fill the silence.

you're quiet, comtemplating for a moment. "would you like to?"

she laughs out a breath "oh i would love too. its a shame you dont have a second helmet, we could ride together"

you glance at her and grin a little before turning around to call out, "hey frankie? you still got that helmet i leant u?"

(idk why im writing i Got homework to do and like i keep thinking tumblr is gonna cut me off with a word count or a character limit but No they just let me Keep Going for like AN HOUR, anyways 👄👁👄

Anon I offer you my hand in marriage the dowry is easy: just keep sending me asks (also go do your homework babes!!)

I absolutely LOVE THIS AAAAA

Also the thought of shortcake going for a ride with you hhh. Her arms are tight around your waist and the engine is rumbling in her ears as shes pressed against your back, it makes you grip the handlebars tighter and at a stoplight you have to take a deep breath to calm yourself. She's never ridden a motorcycle before but in the moment, cruising down the road with her arms around you, she feels safe and secure and wants it to last forever.

Frankie walks outside just as you pull up the driveway.

"How was it?"

Shortcake tugs the helmet off with a giggle and he takes in her wild hair. "So much fun! I never knew it'd be so relaxing."

She never knew how nice it felt to have you in her arms.

Frankie ignores the way his heart hammers wildly in his chest by seeing the way shortcake, his girlfriend, stares as you lean on the handlebars of your bike. He sees her flushed face and hears the hitch in her breathe when she looks at you.

He tells himself it's from the weather. It has to be. Theres no way she feels the same way for you as he does. That's just his own mind taunting him with a fantasy.

That's just him being selfish.

"I should probably head out." Your voice breaks them both out of their own head. Both members of the couple you dreamed of each night wearing a face like a kicked puppy.

"Are you sure? You can stay for dinner if you want-"

"We can order takeout and-"

You hold your hands up in an apologetic gesture. "As fun as its be to watch you guys argue over pizza toppings again, I'll have to pass. I've got an early shift tomorrow. I should get home before it's late so I can get some sleep."

The hand that frankie held on his girlfriend's waist tightened as you backed out of the driveway and into the street with a final wave.

He knew you didn't work tomorrow

"Is she gonna be alright?" Shortcake's voice was tiny, barely heard over the roar of your engine as you drove off.

Frankie knew you were going to spend the whole night driving without a destination.

"Yeah." He pressed a comforting kiss to her temple. "She's alright, just needs to clear her head. We all get like that."

He knew at somepoint in the night you'd stop at that one 24-hour dinner you loved, he would probably stay up and meet you there. If you didnt want to talk about what was bothering you that'd be fine. He would simply order himself a burger as the two of you spoke about whatever nonsense came to mind at 3am before leaving, usually with you following him home and crashing on his couch.

You hadn't done that in a long time. He wonders why.

"I worry about her."

Ah. Right. That's why.

Shortcake leaned her head on his shoulder and he felt a steady thrum in his chest.

"Me too."

Maube he would take her with him tonight. She'd like the fries.

#ask #asks #babe ur KILLING ME WKTH THESE I LOVE THEM #anyways i wejt slightly angsty with it but i cannot compare to your skill #also i hipe you get that homework done so you can relax!!!#you deserve to chill!!#shortcake tag

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norestwithoutlove · 3 years ago

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Hello!

Please excuse this brain-splurge of an Ask, but your fic To Build A Home has been such a beautiful thing to read and I feel that, although I don't have exactly the same traumas and grief's as Dean and Cas, there is so much to relate to and admire in the way you weaved and crafted the process of their thoughts and grew their characters throughout some of the hardest moments of their lives. I have laughed, wept and ached alongside them throughout my whirlwind reading of TBAH this past week, and I just wanted you to know that I was so moved by your writing.

It's wonderful to read a full and colourful love story about Queer characters who I feel such a connection to in many different ways. Its affirming to see a story where our lives are not doomed even if we might have accepted such a fate because we didn't dare to dream that we deserve more.

I'm coming to terms with my grandparents nearing the end of their lives and, through your fic, recognising the humanity of my own parents who I have struggled to connect with. In some ways I feel more accepting of the necessity and inevitability of grief as a process. You have illustrated the good and the bad that life brings to be something beautiful. This work has been like a parent telling me that keeping who I am inside is only going to continue hurting me and those around me in the long run. I long for the relief of authenticity, and the catharsis that can be built alongside trauma, that you have so vibrantly portrayed.

I'm also in my final months of my degree at LSE and I find the way you write about imposter syndrome and adolescence so relatable and comforting. If Cas can do it, so can I! Pandemic be damned. I have also loved music all my life and, much like Dean, I write songs when there are things I can't seem to express any other way. I actually wrote a song inspired by TBAH from Dean's point of view, which has been helpful to process why I connect so much with this story. His agonising silences and his outbursts and his successes in TBAH are all breathtaking and soul-stirring. I feel like you've painted Cas and Dean to be simultaneously empathetic friends to me-with all their quirks and faults, and also world-wise unashamed and accepting father-figures.

The connections with the UK are also so lovely to read and have made Cas and Dean feel even more familiar to me at a time when much of my life feels tumultuous and hopeless. I have often sought these characters out to ground me. I didn't grow up with a faith but the way you write about it in relation to family, grief, and love is especially captivating. So I wanted to thank you for sharing something so vulnerable and emotionally pertinent with your readers.

I wish you so much joy, vibrance, and happiness in all your future endeavours. I hope you know that what you've created is good.

I realise this is incredibly gushy but I can't seem to get any of my uni assessments done until I get my thoughts out about your fic! I hope it's not too much.

Thank you for gifting us this AU from the depths of your magical brain box. I hope you're happy that now my whole body hurts every time I see Dean and Cas on Tumblr or Twitter. You did this. Congratulations.🙏

holy FUCK am i sorry this one took me so long to reply to. it's such a beautiful message as well i just am very terrible at replying to things but hi here i am and your message made me beam so thank you thank you for taking the time and being so kind. writing about dean and cas in the hardest moments of their lives helped me through some of the hardest of mine. it's so raw and beautiful knowing it has helped others too.

i really hope you can find the relief of authenticity (you phrased this so beautifully btw) and catharsis after trauma soon. i hope you've already found it and built it in small ways!

ALSO as this is probably from a few months ago i'm gonna assume you've finished up at LSE (apologies if i've got that wrong!) but i wanna say well done on making it through a degree at uni (and such a good one holy fuck im sure im safe in assuming the pressure was high in that place!!! congrats on making it im sure you smashed it). imposter syndrome is something i felt acutely as well so you're absolutely not alone there. and you did it anyway!!! and ahh obviously it must be very vulnerable but if you'd be happy sharing the song you wrote from tbah dean's point of view i'd love love love to hear it!! the fact that you wrote one makes me so happy.

i wish every joy right back at you. congrats again on your degree it's no small feat at the best of times, let alone during a pandemic and with other huge life complications along the way. i'm sure whatever you're doing now is beautiful and i hope you're finding so many happinesses along the way <3

#im so sorry again this was so fucking late!!!!!!#embarrassing for me #but yeah big well done #and big thank you as well this message was so so lovely #i dont even know what to say !#klauskatz-hargreeves #answered #tbah #to build a home

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