#anyway if you know me irl and im managing to be on top of all these personal chores and shit? im doing real bad bestie :)

[meanderfall]

having a "i'll be a functional human being later" kind of weekend

[pinkelotjeart]

hey its me im back to info dump about the qsmp some more so bolas BOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLASBOLAS

Sorry my demons so a bunch of stuff happens on the island bla bla bla  but the important thing is that all the eggs get kidnapped and no one (not even the evil federation that runs the island) knows where they are and the parents are told to get on a train to be relocated to some random island until the federation deals with the missing eggs but the train is hijacked and the players are now in purgatory this event was hell

this fucking event was hell on earth. Not only for us, the viewers, but also for the ccs The rules are these: Islanders are separated into 3 different teams Red (aka BOLAS?!?!? -thats their actul name ), Green (aka team green ninjas), and Blue (aka team soulfire)

there is a big evil guy and he is the one that kidnapped the eggs and he runs this event all the teams have tasks that need to be done in a day and the team with the highest score is the winner of that day

The 'ultimate winner' is the team who has won the most days across the two-week period. The winning team gets to choose some of the eggs to come back home with them

then the hell begins im gonna talk about team bolas here cause they are the ones i watched the most but team green ninjas and team soulfire were also very fun  team bolas consists of: 

philza- the team leader Baghera Jones

 Carre

 Cellbit

 Felps

 Foolish

 Germán

 Jaiden

 Slimecicle

 Vegetta

 Wilbur Soot 

Willyrex

but the ones that logged in the most were phil, slime, jaiden, foolish, baghera, cellbit and carre

at fistr team bolas tried to talk to the other teams, they didn't start fighting right away because why would they! these people were their friends! the people that helped them and that they made a community with, why would they mindlessly start killing each other? so team bolas tried to talk and the other teams respond by killing them over and over 

and over 

and over 

and over again they kept killing team bolas even tho they only wanted to talk| at the end of the first day team bolas was fucking depressed as fuck they also went insane yk jaiden, jaiden animation ? if you don't she is an animator and is generally kid-friendly and doesn't swear super much im saying this because one of the most popular clips from the purgatory even was her screaming “kill yourself” from the top of her lungs i don't have the clip saved but if i find it ill send it to you is so funny anyway, so yeah team bolas went insane they all started wearing these gas masks and it looks so fucking cool 

oh and the ccs wore actual gas masks irl look

also everyone (but especially baghera and cellbit) got super attached to phil and started calling him dad, an now baghera has trauma and is super clingy to phil cause she sees him as a father figure 

also everyone on team bolas HATES bbh i hope he dies and burns and is tortured eternally <33

(bbh was fucking ruthless and was a notorious spawn killer and gave everyone but especially charlie trauma)

but after the disaster that were the first couple of days team bolas made an insane comeback and manage to fucking win the event!!!

so in conclusion bolas forever <3

there are a lot of more fun moments from the purgatory event (like charlie terrorizing quackity, everyone going insane when carre logged in, that one time charlie pretended to be wilbur) but these were the basics of team bolas

hope you had a fun time reading this lol it was a lot of fun to write, and again if you want me to elaborate on anything (for example i could talk about q!phil and how his hardcore lore has become a part of the qsmp) tell me!! also if you plan on watching the qsmp and you want to know where to start you could also ask me that and ill happily help you get into the qsmp!!

again hope you had fun reading all this and i hope you have a nice day :3

AH THIS IS SO UP MY ALLEY, GOSH I LOVE THE MASKS. I for sure need to watch the vods, team bolas basically had everyone in it that im intrested in watching omg. I love the insanity but also the companionship of just losing it together. I love some minecraft killing game stuff (big life series fan lol) OH YEAH I SAW THAT PHILS HARDCORE WORLD LORE WAS CANON?? Ive watched phil a little before he joined the dsmp and I watched him religiously until 2022 so I know the lore of the hardcore world and I AM VERY ATTACHED TO IT. I am assuming Q!phil was hardcore!phil before but somehow got kidnapped to the island(?) I AM FOR SURE checking that out

[tunaababee]

gonna get really sappy and DEEPLY tmi/personal about twenty one pilots on main so im gonna put it under a cut. i am cringe but i am free and clancy tour coming up is giving me Feelings

i've been a top fan since 2016. i initially had some resistance to them bc it was when Stressed Out was at its peak and like, yall know how oversaturation goes. even if its good, its fucking annoying by proxy. all the 12/13 year olds at my high school were into it. i was turning 17. and it was a really fucking rough year.

i've been deep into homestuck since i was about 14/15, but by age 16 i had branched out into text-based rp and met a guy from italy who i kind of had a situationship with i guess?? at the time?? idk if that's what the kids call it. (whenever i describe how many relationships ive had, i count this one as a 0.5) anyways. it eventually got to a point where he was emotionally abusing me for a period of about four months. it was brief, but intense, especially since im a fucking lovesick lonely teen at this point who doesnt know any better. he lovebombs me, talks to me and acts like i am his girlfriend, gets jealous and shitty if i talk about other people, but then the moment he goes and does the same shit i get told i'm the reason he was depressed, im the reason for his problems, etc. until he calmed down and placated me and won me over again. over and over, regularly, for four months. it was a lot for my little developing brain to handle.

i know people have had it longer, have had it worse, but it really left a lasting impact. i was left with a litany of abandonment issues, and self-esteem and image that was already bad was buried dead in the fucking ground. i wanted to die every single fucking day for those four months. he even told me, as i began to question my sexuality properly, that i couldnt be bi 'because i liked him'.

but he LOVED twenty one pilots. would quote their shit regularly. wore the merch. all that stuff.

by 2016 i'd managed to see clearly enough and have enough support from friends that i felt comfortable cutting him and his circle off permanently. and it was fucking hard. i didn't have a lot of irl friends at the time and it felt like my only support network. after i finally left, i was desperate to feel some semblance of control, take something back, my own personal little 'fuck you' i could carry in my heart.

with all the hype around them, i gave top a try. slowly eased my way in. i knew i was hooked when i heard Holding On To You for the first time. it made me feel like i could take back that control and find a light at the end of the tunnel.

i consumed everything they had put out after that. i saw them live at emotional roadshow sydney 2017, i was turning 18. i made so many new friends. i felt such hope in my heart. i sobbed so fucking hard when they played HOTY. they weren't the only reason i made it through, itd be naive to contribute everything to them when i've done a lot of work and so have the people around me, but they were like a lifeline to hold on to when things were hard.

i went and saw them again in 2018 for the bandito tour. i made my own outfit and was surrounded by people who had done the same. i made more friends, had more adventures. i was dropping out of high school the year that Trench released due to having the worst mental health i'd had probably since my abuse and felt so lost but it helped me feel a little more stable and grounded. like that light was still there.

a lot has happened since. i'll be 25 when i go see them in November, once again at Qudos Bank Arena in sydney. i'm in a happy relationship with someone i love who respects me. i'm doing things that make me happy. i'm happy. i've felt and experienced and lived and loved and lost and done so so so much since i was a scared 16 year old hearing them for the first time. i've gotten piercings and tattoos, something i never thought i'd do, and put their work permanently on my body. i'm so proud every time i see my tattoo on my arm. i genuinely love and accept myself exactly as i am, which is something i NEVER thought i'd do.

having Clancy come out nine years to the day from blurryface, an album that has been so deeply important to me in a lot of ways, gets me real misty. this entire tour gets me so misty. i didn't think i'd live past 18 at BEST. but i'm here and i'm fucking happy.

genuinely cannot emphasise how much this album and this tour means to me. i plan on getting a Clancy tattoo once the album comes out and i've had some time to sit with it. it feels very full circle, i guess. hearing Next Semester has just had me thinking about this constantly and all weepy all the time haha. but a good weepy.

i cannot fucking wait to scream in a stadium full of people again in a way that heals my heart.

[squeakheart]

talking abt doc's gender swap attack... ik its not that deep and oda just wanted to draw ppl growing tits but whatever! doc q genderposting UTC

-

doc's powers kinda hold a lotta my bbp gender hcs together so like... untangling what he can and can't do... i think he has limitations (especially since one piece already has ivankov's power to instantly permanently transition ppl)

we know his attacks wear off (or can be cancelled out with willpower) so if u wanna keep the changes you'd hafta go back to him for a top-up

he's illness themed & his attack worked like a transmissible virus so thats something to keep in mind logistically ... but the optics of it are a bit "chemicals in the water to turn the frogs trans" so like... i wanna be kinda careful with it yk...

in my hcs i think its still transmissible but closer to the irl "if your partner is on tgel and you touch them you might absorb some" thing than like "if you cough everyone in the room suddenly transitions"

i dont think he can "swap" genitals even tho that kinda felt implied in canon... prob just size changes and erectile function changes

he objectively sucks as a doctor (and as a person) so i think hes not very good at balancing ppls hormones .. inconsistent ass levels compared to what other (normal) one piece doctors could give u

weird side effects likely since like. its doc q

he can probably diy some regular hrt (premarin at least .. hes literally a horse guy) but he would prefer doing it w his powers

basically his attack functions more like real-world HRT than a magical gender-swap button in my hcs

the bbps i hc as trans are augur (trans girl) laffitte (transfem nonbinary) shot, burgess and kuzan (trans guys) and he manages their hormones for them ... he was extremely chasery in canon with the femlaw thing and unforch i cant imagine him being less of one for his crewmates erm ... they all have fucked moral compasses so a lot of them probably arent bothered (shot especially wouldnt give a shit) but i think kuzan might be uncomf since hes used to having access to more professional/less pervy doctors :p i also go back and forth on whether laffitte would medically transition at all? burgess is definately roiding as well as regularly transitioning. basically i think he does a servicable job managing the crew’s transitions while still being who he is & with them all being who they are

as for doc's own gender .. i think he tested that shit out on himself for sure (both bc i think he has to be patient zero for his power to work and bc he would just want to) ... i don't neccesarily think hes trans but i do think hes very open to temporary experimenting .. again kinda goes back to the extreme chaser energy

wrt bebe - this part is straight up sooooooo personal!!! but if youve read my fics you alr know the situation with him getting super weird and fetishistic about her body. ive written him saying a lot of stuff that would be kind of inexcusable for a real person to say to me (perisex ppl dni with any of my doc q is weird about intersex ppl hcs fr. 🔫 its on sight) but ig im kinda working thru negative feelings about my own body by making my fictional guy super enamoured with it OTL anyway fetishism aside he is helping her balance her hormones and achieve some changes she wants while also encouraging her to not hide features that she shouldnt have to be ashamed of ... the rat whiskers thing is a facial hair analogy & in my canon hes a lot of the reason she lets them grow out after the timeskip. the boobs she gets after the timeskip are also his work (i think ive drawn/posted this before) .. thats about all i'll say rn im getting embarrassed tbh

[grahamcarmen]

Just wanted to tell you that whenever you vent, I feel so heard and seen, like someone was literally listening when I was ranting in my brain.

Also how many asks do you have in your askbox right now ignoring this one.

you and me ranting and venting forever XD ha!

i'm glad my venting is not in vain I have so much weary complaining in terms of why i do not understand. like . always under duress and always in the disclaimer corner , but ???

i'm just more tired than angry...still angry but :/

overall?

6

not much but like the first 2 i probably won't answer because one is a hornet nest i mostly agree with /and the other one was telling me that apparently the fandom said something so. freaking. dumb. a lot of dumb somethings actually, that i just 1000 yard stared into space that I had someone asked me irl if i was ok [the rest is so sweet and made me happy that they like this blog and i wish that they had a nice day/months too, and that part i do wish i'd answered because i do hope that they manage to find their feet on this website and in general. it can be disheartening but try to remember that this is for you to have fun so try to carve a corner for the things that interest you!]...

anyway it still feels like kicking hornets nests and giving input to wild stupidity that i'm not all informed about its current form, i am annoyed but i don't know the fandom like that tbh to just be hearing that it still is just ...hmmm, why are you guys...why... why are you guys the way- and address it like its not a recycled fandom issue or even new stupider evolution of issues that i don't have first hand knowledge of because i really do...not know those people.

i felt like including one of the stupid somethings on the ask about dumb arguments against rc but i don't actually know the intricacies of why they even feel sure enough to say that. like its just deadass wrong. its insultingly wrong. like anon. that was like top worst accusations like the actual mention in the ask is like a few words and i literally went THEY SAID WHAT.

and for that i am so sorry because it is a very sweet and heartfelt ask that made my day and in the grand scheme i could just address that and not the rest, i just like absolutely did not see that part coming and can't keep myself from addressing it but then i also want to know where the audacity came from to properly do so and then im like...there are other fandoms [to myself]...

...rants are a-ok to send [im probably venting at that moment too about something] but like ajdfnaskf this is probably what it will do to me

hornets nests i will avoid kicking because at the end of the day this blog is the corner i carved out for what interests me and i would like to not have too many of those posted when i scroll through it to get my daily rc boost

and it is the sweetest ask for real but also wtf csfandom. WHY.

and in general loop de loop arguments i simply do not know what new thing i could say to get across stupid argument is stupid...we could be making text posts about how they should kiss instead

3- i did write for rc week! it was a small note at the end of the third one which also has something that feels like it needs a proper response but like i feel VERY snippy on that subject so like its probably gonna wait for a bit i'm so sorry but i did, i wasn't planning to but i did

4-acme...i am thinking about just answering it with the meme

i find all the acme members interesting as individuals and what they contribute thematically to the show

vs.

i do not care for ACME

but like again i do feel like putting like more of an effort since i didn't have any thoughts for the first part of the ask but i would like to make 1 for each part and i don't hate any of the members for real i promise and understand how big ACME is to this show and the franchise in general T,T

5- a fic request! :D im looking forward to working on it? it probably will be short but i'm happy one of my ideas got requested

6-might answer it soon...might be a little rambly but it concerns the boy gray and a nerve that i'm ACTUALLY ready to poke at a little...a little

so again not many but i do feel bad for not answering ASAP (due to many things) when i am very happy to receive them

and then spending my energy on making rc stuff first because thats usually what i have energy for

Like I really am happy whenever I see that there are other people who do enjoy rc and this blog enough to send asks [sometimes very passionate in their defense] . So thank you. very much.

^^

[f3mcelbambi]

STORY TIME PT 1: ANAM CAME TO MY HOUSE AND WE HAD HORNY SEXY TIME

sooooo on monday anam arrived at my house at about 11.30am. i gave her a house tour. i made a funny joke about me locking the bathroom when she inevitably gets horny so she can’t pee (she (we) have a piss kink). we got into my room and i remember it being so awkward like she ASKED me if she could sit on my bed. and i was like babe we are gonna do more than just sit in this bed and she was like 😳 i should also preface that we were home alone too. then she decided to sit on the very edge of my bed with her legs crossed looking all shy and cute. i suggested that we FINALLY watch gone girl and so we did

we got more comfy into my bed and we laid next to each other. at the start we aren’t too close to each other but as the movie progressed we started to snuggle closer together inch by inch. every couple of minutes or so, anam would place her leg more and more ontop of mine. it was really cute i really like the feeling of her weight on me. our arms were smooched next to each other too. we were close enough that we could feel other but not close enough that we were cuddling or anything. there were a few sex scenes in gone girl and the way we just didn’t move a muscle 😭 like we couldn’t even look at each other. and i know she was turned on because a bit later i looked at her and she was bright red. at some point i decided to snuggle closer to her and i remember i was just staring at her arm AND MY LEGS WERE TREMBLING I WAS SO NERVOUS. her legs were still on top of mine so she could feel me shaking. i was staring at her veiny hands and arms for at least 5 minutes and she CAUGHT ME😭 i know for a fact she clocked on ages ago that i was staring. she was like “are you still watching the movie” and i was like hahaha yeah of course hahahah. i remember looking at her right and she does this thing when she’s shy. she puts like a fist over her mouth to cover her face but i saw how red her cheeks were there was no hiding that

after the movie we were both almost spooning each other, me being big spoon, obviously. i remember she was like “so who’s side are you on” and i was like amy obviously? and she was like “REALLY? how?? she’s literally insane? i’m on nicks side” are we surprised by this guys 😐 ofc she’s on nicks side. she said amy was being extreme and what nick did wasn’t even that bad (blood red flag). bro during the cool girl monologue i couldn’t keep my ass quiet i was just mouthing the whole thing. anyways after that anam decided to sleep? no deadass she was literally like i’m going to sleep. at this point it was like 1pm and i was like bro did not come to my house just to sleep. but i let her coz i’m just such a nice person. but i’m an idiot right, i had no idea anam was indicating that she wanted to cuddle. THE WHOLE TIME SHE WAS LIKE “do you wanna sleep with me“ “let’s sleep together” “both of us should just sleep” and i was just like bitch i ain’t sleeping at 1pm. GUYS IM ACTUALLY SO MENTALLY DENSE ITS INSANE. i just went to get my book and read, i didn’t even manage to get through a page before anam was like “wow are you actually just gonna leave me here to sleep” and i was like bruh but you just said..

so for a bit of context, my bed doesn’t face the tv. so we had to lay down horizontally to face the tv. at this point we had now moved to lay on the bed normally. i suggested we play the wii but she was like i’ll just watch you. and i was like nah you have to play too. i was making her mii character and i guess i made her flustered because i was like “show me what your eyes/eyebrows/hair/smile looks like” and she just couldn’t look at me and she was like “you should already know what my face looks like” i tell you she was so red in the face. i played a round of table tennis and won 6-0 and anam really likes table tennis so i suggested she play and she was like nahh it’s better irl. but i passed her the remote and she got.. really into it. she lost the first 4 games and it was hilarious watching her get so agitated. then she was “you know what i’ve gotta stand up for this” however the only way to get out of the bed was to climb over me :)

and anam realised this before i did. she was all like “jordan move” and i was like what why?? then she was like “move your legs” and then i clocked on. and i started to tease. she’d try climb over my leg and i would raise my legs higher. she wouldn’t even dare come close to my torso because she would actually have to get on top of me and i guess that made her nervous. i eventually let her get off but i got turned on. and so i started to uh touch myself 😇 whilst she was playing the wii. she had her back turned to me and didn’t really look back. but my voice had changed. it had gotten a lot softer and sluttier. she noticed this but pretended not to. i didn’t go all the way but i just played over my shorts and pressed down on my bladder. but i didn’t cum or anything it was only for like a couple minutes. I AM SO SURPRISED I COULD HOLD BACK MOANS BUT I WAS SO CLOSE TO LETTING ONE OUT. she played 6 games and won 2 but those games were long and intense. but she was satisfied and went back to bed

she sunk herself back into my bed again and she decided to face the wall and not me. but i kept tugging on her, trying to pull her towards me and making her try not to fall asleep again. at this point i was spooning her and my face was in the crook of her neck. i was holding onto her upper arm trying pull her towards me so she could face me. and it turns out that she “needed to use the bathroom”. and we both knew what this was code for. but i stuck to my word when i said i wasn’t gonna let her. so i didn’t. i could see it on her face that she was aching. and not to pee. she stood on my bed in attempt to get back up again but i ended up holding onto her foot so she couldn’t move. she said that if i won’t let her go to the toilet, i’ll have to let her sleep. so i let her go back to bed

i turned towards the tv and watched youtube on mute and after little time she turned around to see what i was doing. i heard her shuffle (btw the house was dead silent at this point so i could hear everything) and i turned back to her and she was finally faced towards me, laying her on her back. prior to today, we always used to talk about her legs muscles hurting and how i’d massage them. but i always forgot to massage them whenever we hung out. she had her knees up and brought up the fact that her “leg muscles hurt” so i knocked her outer thigh and asked her if it hurt. she told me that’s not where it hurt. so i asked to show me where it hurt. she went silent. so i looked her in the eye and asked “where” again, and she got all red again and showed me. she rubbed her inner thigh, right next to her 🐱. i smiled at her and told her i’d tend to it later. she replied saying “no you wont” almost as if she was daring me to. but knew that i was too shy to touch her like that. i just told her that “i will”, then turned around towards the tv. and so she turned back around to go to sleep. i immediately went back to tugging on her for her not to go back to sleep. so she made me a deal. she said if i gave her a back massage for 5 minutes, she’d stay awake. so i did. we had this massage in silence for a bit until she broke the silence to tell me to do it “harder”. you should’ve heard the horniness in the way that she said it. so i did it harder. but she had to stop me for an obvious reason 😉 she almost didn’t keep up her end of the bargain by going back to sleep again but i finally managed to roll her towards me and now this is where things get :3

so now anam is directly facing me but she has hair all over face that she strategically doesn’t push away so i don’t see how red her face is. and then she rolled herself into my chest and we started to cuddle :) it was the cutest thing ever she was all nuzzled into me and i just had my arm over her rubbing her back. it was adorable. it was SO adorable that i decided to take picture of her. and i did… until my flash turned on 😃 SHE DIDNT NOTICE BUT MY LORD. anyways so. anam had her hand kinda just just chilling and i decided to play with it. i was tracing my finger around her fingers then making spirals in her palm. i did this for a little while and then anams hand started to get veiny. she normally gets veiny when she’s warm. i played with her veins then went back to her fingers and palm. then her hand started to tremble. her fingers were starting to shake and started to close the gap between them. then she’d make a fist so i was unable to open her hand again. and i thought anam was just playing a little game with me. so i’d force open her fingers and do it again and the whole cycle would repeat. during this i could hear the saliva in her mouth when she’d part her lips. sounding like she was trying to hold something back

it got to the point where anam retracted her whole hand from my grasp and turned to the other side, laying on her stomach. and i was like hey why you do that. she didn’t say anything but she just moved around. so i got ontop of her then went round to the other side to face her. there wasn’t much room so we were squished next to each other. and my face was right next to hers asking why she turned around. so she turned her face around again. but left her body facing me. including her arm. so i picked it up and played with it again… and then i heard her whimper. into my pillow. i looked at her and laughed. realising that she was horny this whole time. i looked down to see my knee was tactically wedged right at her 🐱 which i hadn’t even noticed until then. but i didn’t move. she was moving against it and fidgeting around. i realised she was getting off on my knee. i was still playing with her hand at this point. anam had completely surrendered herself to me. i could feel the tension in her hand leave as she stopped trying to fight against my hand by closing her hand into a fist. her hand went limp. i continued to play. i felt all of her arm and started to squeeze and such. i went back to her hand and clenched her fingers as if i was pinning her down. and i moved my knee more into her. i don’t think she wanted to me to realise she was getting off on me so she pushed my knee out of the way

then i watched her other hand which was previously resting (trembling) on my thigh disappear underneath her. she started touching herself over her jeans. she completely unraveled herself to me and became undone. she lost control. she started whimpering louder and wriggling around more and more on my bed. and i just watched. and continued making her hand tingle. i could feel her hand clench and unclench around mine. watching her squirm around and moaning like that, i don’t think i had ever been more turned on in my life. watching her thrust on her hand. and my lord her voice. the way she sounds. i wanted to interfere but i didn’t want to interrupt. so i watched until she stopped. she didn’t cum because i think she became painfully self aware that i just watched her touch herself and felt incredibly embarrassed. she retracted her hand from me once again and turned her body round with her face, away from me. i don’t think she looked at me for a good 5 minutes after that.

during those 5 minutes, anam had asked me to go to the bathroom. and instead of just me saying no, i held onto her waist, and not just her waist, her bladder. and made sure i pressed down. and this obviously made her a lot worse and so we play fought. bless her she really did try to unclamp my grasp for a long while. she put up a good fight. but i did not let go. i remember being like “you underestimated my strength” and her replying “you just caught me in a moment of weakness” yeah well no shit babes x. after a little bit she just submitted herself to me. and i started to caress her. i could feel her heart beating rapidly on my arm. i felt all around her. her arms her chest her back. and i lifted up her top slightly to feel her waist but by then she couldn’t handle it anymore so she went “to use the bathroom”. she wasn’t in there long and after she came back out, that was the first time i saw her face in about half an hour. safe to say her cheeks were burning red

it was around 4pm now and anam had to go home soon. she suggested that i should take her home and so i obliged. but before she left, i made her drink a whole glass of water. i cornered her so she couldn’t leave and i watched her drink the whole thing. she kept drinking little sips and showing me saying that she couldn’t drink the whole thing. but i made her. i did this so her bladder could activate on the way home so she’d be extra horny. she knew my reasons. she made me drink from the same glass and i made sure i placed my lips on the same place she did. we got on the bus and i brought up unsubtly what had happened back in my bed. anam played dumb and pretended that nothing happened. but i played blunt and told her i remembered her moaning in my bed. and she was like “actually 🤓👆 i was whimpering”. and i was like same thing. she was too shy to talk about so she told me she was going non verbal. however i had a question

i asked her if her leg muscles were doing better. she said that they were “fine” in a moment of panic. i told her i didn’t believe her and that i should massage them. she looked at me shocked and was like “on the bus?!” and i was mhm. there weren’t that many people on there anyways. there was a bit of silence and i looked at anam and noticed her hand was resting on her thigh. and from there i formed a plan. i trickled my fingers down from her arm onto her thigh, and at that part, she clocked on to what i was doing. i started inching my fingers closer and closer towards her inner thigh, aiming for her 🐱. however her hand was blocking my hand from going towards the centre. at this point i was already on her inner thigh so i started tapping and rubbing my hand on her inner thigh. anam at this point, her hair was covered but i could see the red on her face. and i could see her watching my hand intensely. sometimes she’d pretend to be looking out the window or keeping a neutral face but i could see right through her. occasionally people would come on and off the bus walking past us so i’d stop. but i liked the risk and got bored of stopping so i’d just not stop touching her. even if people saw.

anams hand still hadn’t moved and so i just point blank stared at her in the eye and asked her to move it. she was shy and moved it very slightly up. i smoothly moved my hand underneath hers but she thought she was smart so she tried to trap my fingers out by clasping them. she failed and i managed to get two fingers in. wiggling them underneath her grasp. i wasn’t quite at her centre but i played with what i could could. gliding my 2 fingers up and down her thigh. at this point anam surrenders again and fully lifts up her hands and i finally had free rein over her inner thighs and centre. i take advantage of this quickly move towards the middle and anam gets shy immediately and puts her hands back down. sometimes she’d weakly push my thumbs in a false attempt to remove them. every time she raised her hands up i could actually feel myself get more wet because i knew she wanted it. but unfortunately the bus ride wasn’t long and we had gotten to the bus station. but i didn’t stop. i continued rubbing her thigh even though there were people watching, there was a man stood next to us trying to get off the bus and but i just couldn’t help myself. i loved watching people watch us. a couple of guys stood behind us watching waiting for us to get up off the bus. and i know they knew. i could see it in their faces. anam was embarrassed but she didn’t try to stop me either

we got off the bus and anams first words were “can i go to the bathroom” and i just giggled and i walked us in. again she didn’t take long but she did take a little longer than last time. we walked for a couple minutes before anam said that “we can talk about it now” and so we did. it didn’t really go anywhere since anam was too shy to even speak. but i walked her home. i remember we took a short break from walking to sit. well she sat and i stood over her but i think that made her nervous too so we began walking again. anytime i made any sexual reference she tried to deviate. bless her she was so so so shy. idk if i’ve said it enough but she was very very red. that whole day. a few steps before we got to her house, anam made a joke about being “immune to my water” meaning she didn’t get horny because of it (what a liar) and i was like i bet u wouldn’t be immune if i soccer punched you in the bladder. and so she stopped walking. and she let me punch her. 3. times. and every time was the harder than the last. she even moaned on the last one. she would literally recoil but i never hit her that hard. she just had a full bladder

so now i’ve walked anam home and i’m about to walk home but i go chill in the bus station for a bit and me and anam start talking …

[to be continued]

[robins-den]

I literally don't know anything abt genshin lore LMAO harbingers . What's that (exaggeration) all i know is that they're named after my beloved commedia del arte stock characters </3

this dottore?

let me introduce u to the man who is literally me irl no doubles OH BEFORE I DO some girlie who crossed over here from twitter i assume (posted a bunch of effort art over like two days) was hardcore self shipping with dottore and i blocked her after the first two bc like, im chill with it but uninterested in seeing someone crush on me since idk her but looking back the webttore art was good + i feel bad so i'll go dig her out of my blocks and unblock her i think. would be a crime to ban her from the irl dottore on tumblr (real) ANYWAY

HI ITS ME <3 dottore. sorry i was not into commedia del arte dottore first i was wiki diving for an antagonist for my fan comic, found him, was like 'this guy is great he's very evil and works perfectly for what i need. top ten character'. a week later i went insane over him

rest assured however that i HAVE read like three commedia plays and they were fun. if you have any that you like send me them so i can read them. uhh i don't have the words to type out dottores lore rn

BEFORE YOU GO HOWEVER

you may see people calling this man dottore. or primettore. those people are wrong and should be shot in the streets. he's literally a fake and stole my fucking job and nobody noticed because all the harbingers hate each other and actively ignore whenever weird shit goes on with each other.

this guy is ALSO a fake. he stole my fucking bdsm harness while i was arguing with the cats tail manager for all the fucking cat hair in my cream soda. blow him up with a nuke if you see him

to reiterate

REAL ^^^^^

PUNCHED ME IN THE DICK AND STOLE MY JOB ^^^

[izabellwit]

🤡😈🎢✨🎶🍦💖🎯👀✅💔

im sorry im sending so many of these feel free to ignore some if you already got em <3

these answers got kinda long so dhjfgj under the readmore it goes!!

🤡What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

Hunter manages to shove all the junk into one corner and make the start of a fairly presentable bed in the other corner by the time the human re-arrives in the Boiling Isles and throws open his door hard enough to smack it against the wall.

“You took my advice!” shouts the human, at the top of her lungs.

“Hiiiiii,” says Hunter, hands over his ears. The human takes a deep breath. Hunter closes the door in her face. “Byeeee.”

(From this fic!!)

There's a lot of lines I've written over the years that make me laugh, but Hunter and Luz as a funny sibling duo…. Every time I reread this fic I giggle at this scene. 

😈 Has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers?

OH ABSOLUTELY there's a few lil ones… I think the one I do most often is namedrop other fandoms/charcters? This happens a lot in my KH fics. Like I'll have a TWEWY reference or character show up for like one second and then never again. Just for funsies and also flavor and also bc I love twewy. 

Sometimes I will also set up scenes specifically to make readers think the worse happened/some guy died or whatever and then it gets revealed its something funny instead. I do that a lot too djhsfgkj

🎢Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

LABYRINTHS OF THE HEART. I love all I've written but nothing will ever come close to Labyrinths. It was freshmen year of college and stuff was happening irl and that fic just. Went places. I had so much fun with it.

✨Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

AAAA. UM. Oh god. Uhhhh I think I do pretty well with characterization / character voice? Also a lot of my fics I write for me and im always very happy with them… they are exactly what I wanted to read. Does that count??

🎶Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

YEAH. For certain fics I'll make a whole playlist, even! As for a song on loop.... this one! Inkpot Gods by the Amazing Devil never leaves my brain haha

🍦What's the sweetest fic you've created so far?

Ohhh gosh. Okay so its either Klee meeting the knights of Favonius or Hyakkimaru and Dororo comedy fic hjdfgkjgh

💖What made you start writing?

Oooo I gotta think about this one... hmmm, I think, I've always been a daydreamer and as a kid I used to be annoyed I couldn't "reread" my daydreams like I could my favorite books?? so I decided I just had to write them down eventually I think jhdfkgj

Of course in my mind before i could write down my ideas I had to actually get GOOD at writing (kid brain. My logic is silly, write whatever and whenever u want, u do not need "skill" to get started but ANYWAY) that's also how I started writing fic, for writing practice!! And now years later I'm still at it haha

🎯Have any of your readers accurately guessed major plot points? Care to share which?

Oooooh, a lot of readers in Labyrinths guessed the final plot point, which is that Varian will become the moondrop… most of my fics don't tend to have major twists though, I think…? There's one other fic I've written that has a HUGEE twist, but it hasn't been revealed yet and no one's guessed it yet, so ;)

👀 Tell me about an up and coming wip please!

i have a player and xehanort on the island fic in the works (exploring his possible childhood, character study and legacies kinda thing), and its still veeeeeery rough draft (like. basically still just notes) but I do have this exchange!!!

-do you think they’ll like me?

-who?

-the friends from my dreams. I’m not— do you think they’ll like me anyway?

-of course.

-but how do you know? What if they don’t? What if— what if I go out there and no one—

-he stops. He doesn’t know where he was going with that.

-silence. And then his teacher leans forward, and holds him close. I love you, they say. I love you very much.

-that isn’t what I asked.

-but it's my answer. They press a hand to his head. You’ll understand, one day. 

✅ What's something that appears in your fics over and over and over again, even if you don't mean to?

The above exhange: "i love you / that isn't what I asked / but it is my answer" has actually shown up in a few fics! It's a common theme I guess u could say... its a conversation that means something to me and I think it is changed slightly by the context of every story, so I keep bringing it in jhdfgkj

Other things that crop up a lot....Found family for sure! Uhhh the phrase "rolling the thought like candy on [their] tongue" shows up a lot without my meaning it too djhfgjkh

Oh!!! Honey!! Honey shows up a lot. I think honey is fantastic. Did u know it lasts forever? Also it has great medical properties--Anyway I think you get the idea haha

💔 Is there a fic of yours that broke your heart?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27801085/chapters/68061658 hehe

Anyway. The woods whispering fic may be completed but I think about the fucked up found family relationships in that fic 24/7. The moment i posted the last chapter i had to stare at a wall for a bit haha

[m1ckeyb3rry]

I laughed so hard you did Lorenzo so dirty (facts though LMAO) hideous dog LMAOOOO I get it for sure though like ugly cute (heavy on the ugly) I really only enjoy seeing him when he interacts with Barou I truly cannot appreciate that man’s features

So real someone come save chigiri and the fact that those three say that all in the same match is WILD like can the crowd hear them talking at all when they’re broadcasted?? I’d hope not LMAO

Barcha being a two man team will never fail to make me laugh but they clearly did not get a lot of plot armor AHDGJS

Speaking of legs that reminds me of epinagi Nagi’s thighs after Zantetsu first hits him in the face like??? I need me a Barou though I want those scary dog privileges

Miratoya for life guys >>> I remember some people hoping they’d have the same va too (or Aiku and Nanami lol) but the va they chose def gives me the same vibe as Toji like…

Ok that’s why im torn LOL like the Shidou lines are so iconic but on the other hand if some of my friends try to connect the dots I gotta be ready to defend myself like I swear it’s not that deep it’s just soccer pls ignore whatever comes out of this character’s mouth

LMAOO hypebro shidou always ready to cheer you on I have no idea how Loki manages them though HAHAHA

NAH FR!! I think the generally decide characters for LN based off popularity….approximately anyways because I’m pretty certain Karasu is generally more popular than Yuki on the JP side (mainly due to shipping but I digress) but according to that sort of trend I’m praying….I definitely would not be opposed to a Nanase one either though!! Tbh I think he’s so cute and I love him too it’s just we barely see him so I don’t have much to go off of (besides him being real estate to Rin) I’d like to know how Shidou spawned into the world though LOLL

MARRIAGE FR HAHAHA like give me your hand in marriage please I’ll give you kombucha!!!! Man lied straight to our faces like the way he managed to find a Yankee’s (I think that’s the term they use) house too??? Like the odds that he didn’t stumble upon some average household too but fr like the man definitely has his own savings account and stocks portfolio like there’s no way (STOPP NO NOT THE FINANCE BRO that lowk slipped my mind but that reminds me of that tiktok audio that’s like “im looking for a man in finance” LMAOO)

Bro that panel is in like my top 10 Karasu panels LMAOAOA when he’s surveying the field and Isagi’s like lol you’re leaving yourself open dumbass and then Karasu whips out his arms shshshshs he’s so gorgeous <3(yeah he kinda looks like a penguin here now that you mention it but it’s ok pretty on brand if you ask me) always appreciate a good Karasu panel though so thank you for your service hehe

Also wait I forgot to bring this up but when I first saw the like official character design references (?? Like the visuals they release on the official website that have them looking like they’re getting their mugshots taken) I was thrown so far back by the jersey colors LMAOAOA I think it looks a lot more muted in the color pages of the manga and also (like the one in your header) shidou and rin take up so much space that you can’t see the details but Karasu and Otoya look like candy canes LMFAOOO and also Yuki/Nagi’s?? I usually like blue but something about it looks so off to me HAHAHA (also their faces but wtv ig)

-Karasu anon

this dog is how i see lorenzo LMAOAAO…but i should refrain from insulting him too much because if he ends up the way otoya did i’m going to scream!! i agree though i feel like he’s really fun w barou and honestly helps him loosen up a bit (even though barou and aiku will always be my fav random ubers friendship)

i feel like the crowd probably can’t hear them just because they’re not shouting or anything and they don’t have mics!! realistically it’s like how irl we don’t hear the players shit talking each other in soccer games but that doesn’t mean it happens yk?? regardless though there was…quite a lot being said during the u20 match LMAOAOA i need karasu and shidou to start saying unhinged stuff again!! like let’s spice up pxg vs bm a bit w some random nonsense from those too 😭 although ig rin has got it covered this time

HELP i had to go back and look and omg??? nagi’s whole build is crazy to me because even before soccer he was so jacked but he literally did nothing all day?? i need that kinda metabolism fr

MIRATOYA CANON 😜 except he’s abt to get a taste of his own medicine when i cheat on him w his best friend 😦 LMAOAO i agree though aiku’s current va has very toji vibes!! he delivered exactly what i expected from aiku

shidou is just shidou the more you think abt it the worse it gets 😩 omg loki is fr a saint like i know he’s being selfish and doesn’t care abt the team as long as charles develops but honestly i have to commend him for keeping his sanity while coaching that crazy blend of characters like i can’t even blame him 😭

nanase was just the only character i could think of that hadn’t gotten a ln besides tabieita and shidou that was also in bllk since it seems like they’ve only done bllk players so far?? but maybe now that aiku is in bllk and he was mentioned in barou’s ln we’ll get one on him. agreed though i’d rather see one for shidou!! was he born like this or did he experience smth that changed his life into whatever it is now?? apparently he didn’t play club soccer pre-bllk so how did he even get scouted??? he’s such a mystery LMAO

FRR he managed to find some bigass mansion and everything 😭 honestly i can’t even blame him if some random kid i barely knew tried to follow me home i would also take the opportunity to mess w him because what 😟 HAHA he truly is a man in finance unfortunately…he was even telling hiori he plays like city planning and stock management simulator video games?? karasu please…let me teach you about mario kart and super smash bros…please…

I LOVE THAT PANEL my fav is def the one in epinagi where he’s introduced and he calls kiyora and nagi dunces hold on let me find it

he just looks so smug and karasu-like in this??? LMAO idk he’s so handsome i love this panel sm

THOSE CHARACTER DESIGNS ARE SO SILLY HAHAHA did you see sae’s neon cleats?? 😰 i think they always look a little odd w the white background though…hopefully it’s a bit more muted in the anime!! it seems like they’re going for a darker color pallet this season (based on the trailer) so i am keeping my fingers crossed 🤞🏻

[seongminiz]

ok. i’m back! getting to the point at work where i’m so bored and bothering everyone because of it jk that’s how i am 5 mins in

so.. what was i saying? bermuda line n reader. i kinda just want to live in a house where i’m available for use for bermuda line at all times but i’m trying to be more creative than that. also just fuckboy!hyunjae i was kind of just thinking if ur like friends with juyeon and younghoon, and they bring him around as like a new friend but they’re like pls y/n don’t sleep with him, it’ll be really hard not to but don’t do it, and ur like wtf do u think of me but then… u get it. and it’s a game all the time of flirting with each other and sexual tension and then when you do sleep together, he’s trying to get you to be as loud as possible so the others can hear in the apartment, “that’s it, you’re so good for me” and all that😵‍💫 but u could also replace hyunjae with juyeon or younghoon or like swap them around, i just think it’s kind of hot🥵

and then, trying to figure out smth for all 3, at the same time, i’m thinking that ur fwb with all of them and they sort of know about each other, and they’re either all friends and talk about it or they don’t rly know each other that well but then maybe they start too, and listen my brain is empty all i can think about is just wake up, juyeon, lunch, hyunjae, dinner, younghoon, like maybe i’m just a slut but… lemme just talk about my hcs for them instead cuz i feel like i can’t articulate but i think there isn’t even anything to be specific about.

i see juyeon as like a dom leaning switch, i’ve read some fics where he’s a really sweet subby himbo and i lovveee that but also just juyeon’s hands… juyeon’s body, everything (and he’s such a sweet boy!!!!) he’s definitely a softer dom, but could be a total tease i barely ever think of him without hyunjae and vice versa because their soft dom/mean dom dynamic is just soo !! good !!!!!! but i also rly only see hyunjae as a dom.. can’t see him subbing so much but i mean, it’s possible. and younghoon.. i like as a sub but he’d also definitely be the sweetest dom, i feel like he’d be less of a tease? much gentler, he’d get off on making you feel so good, diminishing you to nothing but high pitched whines and babbled speech, he’d take rly good care of you<333 so all 3 together would be so perfect!! like crazzyyy good, but it’d have to be like.. spread out cuz idk if it could literally all happen at once, you wouldn’t survive but i’m trying to imagine… cuz .. going way off the tracks now, but dp.. is smth i would never want to attempt irl but it makes me think jumil. and then maybe younghoon in ur throat. idk. idk i’m gonna stop myself here for a min.

- 🧁 anon

OK SO let me start off by saying i think i had a bermuda line threesome thought somewhere in my notes up but unfortunately its on my old phone :') if i manage to find it i'll definitely recycle it for this blog („• ᴗ •„)

but i clearly remember it having mean dom!hyunjae , soft dom!juyeon n even softer dom/service top!younghoon so ,,, i completely agree with u on that ^^

anyways , tbh both the idea of already having an established relationship with all three of them n fuckboy!hyunjae being the 'catalyst' to completely turning around ur lives by starting some kind of fwb/situationship thing bc hes a menace like that

n omg dont get me started on dp with jumil .. or any other combination of them tbh idk im crazy n i just know that they all have monster cocks n dp with them would be an almost spiritual experience fr

[emlos]

yet another dream (long bit tmi and violence)

i dont remember the premise but we were (my real childhood friend and some people my brain decided we're my besties) at some sort of water balloon summer camp, in a city that had the same bus/train network as a cross between my childhood city and the city i live now. the camp itself had a big event on the last day but i domt remember what it was, only that i had a lot of clothes and a bag and a half inflated air mattress, and that i didn't back up on the day my train was leaving for home at 21:00.

For some reason i needed to go to a women's prison to ask a high security prisoner about something, so i took the s2 (train) to get there. the prison was a big building with a facade like the Akademia Sztuk Pięknych in szczecin, with like fairy tale lookin towers and two big rectangular pools where somw inmates were swimming. i got lost and didn't know which door to enter to see the prisoner (i had the "room number" of The cell l, because inside the building had wooden doors and golden room numbers outside of them) so i asked somr gendarmes (kidna old time looking policemen) that were keeping watch where the prisoner was and they pointed me to the right entrance

i made my way up a few flights of stairs that got narrower and narrower until it was just a stone hole to squeeze trough to reach the top, and i managed to do that. At the top was a small chamber with a door and a door guard who was a young guy, he told me the prisoner is in there, and that the hole is a "test of resolve" or something like that, then he opened the door and the prisoner crawled out (the whole room was so short you had to sit or crawl)

the guy tild me about her crime that i cant remember, and she looked like one of these female serial killers that poisoned some of her relatives and died of brights disease. i remeber thinking in the dream god i wish shed press me down and fuck me.

then it was later suddenly (16:00) and i still haven't picked up my stuff from the camp grounds even though everyone else did (i met the irl childhood friend and a fake dream friend and we talked behind the back of the irl friend how skinny she was and i remeber feeling so jealous.) but i had to take the s2 to the prison again for some reason. so i did, i ran down the station and i was so horny all of the sudden (lesbian) that as i sat down on the seat of the s2 i woke up for a second and all my muscles were clenched djsjs

anyway after that i was at the prison again, this time i went through the wrong entrance into the building and i saw a couple of doors that i didn't remember from my previous visit but i didn't enter any of them in case it would be dangerous or something, so i went back out and found two gendarmes standing watch, and i asked them where the right door was (dream me forgot the door number and was apologizing a lot but somehow it worked out). also my friends from.camp were there for some reason lol. so we made my way up to tower again squeezing through the hole and this time the guy alsonhad a trained crocodile with him, thatnhe showed me could do tricks as long as it couldn't see the shiny underside of its tail.

but then the prisoner came out again and we talked i think and then the crocodile got aggressive, so i jumped out of the tower into the pool below

and i guess the other inmates realized that something is happening because a violent chaos and the prisoners started like grabbing screwdrivers and knives that for.some reasons were ta the bottom of the pools and Killing the guards and each other and i remeber having one of those military knives and slashing at he throats of the women who were trying to get out of the pool to.do the same to me, and one of the las scenes was when a red haired womanw as chasing me around the pool until i stabbed her and pushed her in, but whenever i wanted to cut her throat she dived under and kept getting more weapons from the pool

and im sure more happened but at some point my alarm went off

[songmingisthighs]

hi omg its me that one anon who said they were too anxious to send asks and have been here since hooked😁😁 I DOUBT U REMEMBER ME BUT ITS FINE HEHWJSHWHS

i just wanted to say that i absolutely LOVED CACHE U HAVE NO IDEA😭 it somehow managed to make me feel like around 50 different emotions at the same time idk how im still alive after that. i was abt to go bonkers with how cache!woo was acting all throughout the series istg

i STILL read mafia seonghwa where the reader dies an unhealthy amount of times..😫 idk what u put in that fic but its definitely more addicting than drugs (not that ive tried any),, it just gives me the right amount of pain and angst i absolutely love it😫

its sometimes frustrating having a limited vocabulary bcs i badly want to tell u a lot of things and how much i love ur works but i just cant😭

anyway,, hope u stay happy and healthy always!! ur fics not only brought me joy and a bunch more emotions but it somehow helps me disconnect with whats going on irl and how im abt to go bonkers. hehe mwuah ily <3

noooo ofc i remember you!! literally when i saw you spamming the other day, i was like "huh haven't seen them in a while, i thought they're off tumblr" but hey good to see you again !!

ngl i feel like cache was a mistake. a beginning to my downfall or smth dramatic but it just made me realize that i'm not on top of my game anymore and mayhaps it's time for me to quit smt before i made a fool of myself

but pls not mafia!hwa that shit was written SPECIFICALLY to hurt are you good in the noggin ????

i'm glad i've been able to entertain though, it means a lot to know that i have somehow made an imprint in someone's life. i've always wanted to do that but i never could imagine i'd be able to do it from writing. but pls pace yourself ion wanna cause anyone to claw their eyes out from the shit i wrote lmaooo

ilyt anon ! <3

[rayroseu-reblogs]

OOOOHHHHAosuqiixiaxj!!!!!!😎😎🙌🙌🙌✨✨✨ *sweats in replying days later...*

Least

Usually, I interpret dorm tierlist as "least to most likely" I'll approve and relate of this dorm's rules, aesthetic, character, and story-

=

7. My least favourite would be Octavinelle-- Its a really pretty dorm thoughh I like TWST version of underwater dorm 🥺 but it got the least fave because... I wouldnt fare well underwater im not a good swimmer, the people there feels like theyre scheming i wouldnt handle it for one day there and I'm still salty about the whole "were stealing ramshackle because it would be more profitable than Yuu having it!" fiasco KDKAKD sorry not sorry Azul 😩💥

=

6. Next up Savanaclaw💛 THEYRE DEFINITELY MUCH HIGHER than Octavinelle 😭 cuz I love hot weather dorms, my element 😎🙏🙏 so plus plus plus points for Savanaclaw for having that!!! Tbhh they couldve done more for the outer architecture of the dorm but I love the furnitures of this dorm, looks homey tbh

As for the dorm mates,,,, I'm definite straight up NO with their policy that the strongest survives there IM A WEAK ASS BTICH JAJSKA and i like... lazing around but I'm not Leona so sike ig. I love Ruggie and Jack MOST ESPECIALLY JACK, i feel like hes a great student to be around, yk always striving you to work hard, I need more people like that irl honestly 😭

=

5. i havent completed book 6 of ignihyde yet but im not really much of a shut in and im not nerdy enough for computers so i probably wont vibe with most people there because im probably going to be considered like a normie lol, as for ortho and idia, i havent seen much of them and honestly im not the biggest idia fan 💥 so not much of an opinion of them. i love their dorm architecture though, its so cool💙 ive placed them higher than savanaclaw bcs atleast here i wont have to wrestle with some random people lol

=

4. pomefiore!!!! ooooohhh i love this dorm but im really really not sure if i'll fit in so right now i just feel like im an admirer from far away for this dorm of beauty 😭💜 i love the story, i love vil rook and epel, the idol arc was so great!! i also relate to vil a lot about wanting to spite neige just a bit lol i understand that feeling so well augh💥 AND HIS OVERBLOT FORM IS ONE OF MY TOP FAVOURITES OF ALL 💜💜 i think i wouldnt fare well with the constant criticism even though vil or whatever pome student didnt mean too much about it and just want to help💥

=

3. third will be scarabia !! theyre honeslty a tie between heartslabyul i believe these two dorms are most compatible with me- i love their dorm's motive is mindfulness and kalim's the dorm leader!!!! thats alrwady the luckiest sign you'll be ok at nrc... atleast lol i feel like twst en didnt tell its story greatly bcs i honestly enjoyed reading this book through fan translations instead- jamils struggle kinda hits home ksksks ALSO HOT WEATHER DORM 💕💕🥰 and did you see the furnitures for this dorm??? very beautifulll i love their dorm uniform as welll it looks easy to move in and comfortable. 10/10 best dorm for hospitality and management, literally unproblematic, (probably bcs of jamil 😭 )

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2. 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 you know first anythings are always special to me, so heartslabyul ♥️♥️ if theres any book story that twst perfected currently itll be book 1!! I LOVEEE the characters, the build up, the ending, and riddles overblot form!! it was all too engaging and well written, i could feel they worked hard for the first dorm to introduce twisted wonderland !! hm, i kinda like that they have a set of rules to follow even though theyre nonsense akdkks, im probably going to be like deuce if im in this dorm; clueless but trying hard.😩✨ wouldnt mind being in this dorm, unpopular opinion? but i really like their dorm uniform♥️🥰

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1. oh dear here goes...😭👍💚💚💚 diasomnia i feel like theres so manyyyy diaso stans and im just a pebble in contrast of them skslksks anyways this dorm was what started me to play twst in the first place so it was bound to be my best fave lol i wont say much because most people here already stated why this dorm is so loveable-- its the unique cast and the found family dynamics💚💚 also my beloved malleus is from heree soo😳💚😳💚😳💚 i WOULDNT WANT TO BE IN THIS DORM HOWEVER THOUGH the pressure of always being excellent and elegant?? AGHH ITS LIKE POMEFIORE BUT WITH SAVANACLAW HARSHNESS 😭💥 i'd die if the dark mirror sorted me here 💀

a major part of why i like this dorm even though its policies and aesthetic is a complete 180 of me, its the characters..😭👍 All four of them are just so relatable, i see myself in each of them like weuuwusuw did yana toboso wrote these in accordance to what i am..😎💥💥

im most related to silver thoughh-- literally im like him who is raised by a single father whos often absent/travelling, so he desperately wants to be independent to help him ABHSJSS😭😭

=

at lasttt, tbh as much as the 7 dorms are awesome, i think i would love to be in ramshackle the most, i dont mind cleaning and im a traditionalist through and through so i wouldnt mind not having technologies for a while💥 i dont mind its literally a haunted house, ive been wanting to see ghosts but atlast my paranormal experiences are next to nothing😔😔 the only trouble i would get here is having to supervise the majority of nrc students like jsidosk my mental health could never... 🏃‍♀️

AJJSIA ITS FINALLY FINSIHED OH GOODNESS THIS HAS BEEN IN MY DRAFTS FOR SO LONG OMFG😭😭

tagging @cancerdust96 and @roxanavanrouge2400 hehe i feel like u two are diasomnia stans as well-- so im curious as to your reasons for liking themm💚😊😊

hey a little tag game i want to try!!! order your favorite twst dorms from least fave to favorite!

Scarabia: their characters on their own are good but seeing them together makes me extremely uncomfortable?? it’s probably because the orientalism plus people shipping together..it’s not jamil and kalims fault but i have a complicated relationship with scarabia

Octavinelle: idk they just don’t stand out to me. jade is neat but i feel like the tweels are overhyped. don’t really have an opinion about azul

Savanaclaw: again the characters are great but. as a whole they don’t stand out to me. i love jack and ruggie but leona 😬 if you got rid of the sarcasm and smug expression he would be a cool character (i kin him more than i would like) but i feel like he’s wasted potential. also book 2 was the hardest to get through because it was so boring it really did them dirty

Heartslabyul: the card guys!! don’t really care much about them either..i usually like alice in wonderland vibes but their dorm uniforms are the worst things i’ve ever seen. WHY DO THEY WEAR T-SHIRTS?? other than that i don’t have much to say about them.

Pomefiore: THE GAYS okay they’re awesome. this is mostly because of rook i just really like rook. and rookvil. epels great to actually. also on the complete opposite note their dorm uniforms are amazing (maybe even my favorite) i would totally wear them myself. but even though they’re in the top three i don’t really think about them more than any of the other dorms.

Ignihyde: okay of course my second favorite dorm is the cute family. what did you expect. but also they are so interesting?? book 6 has been the best book so far especially with all the lore. also ortho is best boy AND LITERALLY A ROBOT. how can you not like precious robot boy who loves his brother. also their designs are cool the hades hair and teeth are very gender.

Diasomnia: you already knew this was coming. my beloved dark romanticism found family dorm<33 i am literally obsessed with them okay. not only are their designs peak gender but they’re WRITING is so. augh. just the contrast between them. we got two faes who are centuries old and have experienced years upon years of hardship. war. suffering. and then we have two (one and a half) humans who have never experienced loss. or grief. they are honest and hardworking and loyal, they represent youth and joy!! and yet they all have so much LOVE and TRUST for eachother it makes me go INSANE!!!! also you can never miss with gothic aesthetics and fairies…literally the greatest thing out there

anyways in conclusion i think any dorm that isn’t diasomnia and doesn’t have tragedy and fate weaved inside them are plain and boring. if i placed your favorite dorm low feel free to tell me why im wrong and why they are the best!! i would love to hear :)) (also feel free to include ramshackle too)

tagging: @rayroseu-reblogs @ethanwinterfan69 @drdepper @shrimpyjustwrites @llondonfog @wondergeek @frogeloise @morays @hxneylavendxr @teslathelame @the-v-lociraptor @anotherlavendergay @chaoticsnacc @aloodonut @valsol-909 if you guys would like<3

[honeydvew]

what's the biggest life decision (you feel comfortable saying) that you've ever made? do you ever think about what would've happened if you hadn't made a certain choice/how it would've affected your life?

canofworms0 downloading tumblr. i know that sounds stupid but honestly its real. im not allowed to have anything else in regards to social media. not instagram, not twitter, not snapchat, not tik tok, nothing. my mother knows i have tumblr so i dont know why she doesnt make me delete it (but it might have to do with the fact she thinks its like deviant art or smth) but im so glad she doesnt. as social-media-addicted-teenager as this sounds without tumblr my life would fucking suk right now. i wouldnt have the things i do and i wouldnt be as happy. and i can give you examples.

lets go in order of events shall we :)

1. i downloaded tumblr some time last year (around may i think) and i immediately found a blog i liked! they were a 13yo like me they shared some of my interests and they seemed really cool! so i followed them. i dont know this blogs current @ but im so lucky i ever found them. a month or so later they posted about a server! it was a community server that they and some friends were in. i joined. thats where i met @starry-baby-katie and @gayishgothamite. and i love those dorks (affectionate)! we might not talk very offten but i think of them as people who are SO important to me. i love them with my whole soul and i dont know if my life would be as bright without them.

2. around 11/5 of last year i was scrolling through tumblr like usual. i saw an add for a server. at that point i was in maybe three servers on discord and didnt have many friends so i thought you know why not! its a mental health server and i wasnt in the best place maybe could benefit from it a bit. i joined and there were maybe 14 members including the mods. we didnt really think the server would go much of anywhere for a while and i honestly didnt interact much for a while but you know what. now that server is such a huge part of my life i dont think i would be here without it. i mean i love every last person there so much. literally all of them. @the-final-braincell bun bun is honestly one of the best people ive ever met. they’re funny and joyful and just the best to be around. talking to them always cheers me up and she always manages to make me laugh. were on the mod team together and she is such an important part of the team that we wouldnt run as smoothly as we do without her. i love them so so much and if i hadnt gotten tumblr? would never have met them. then theres @sir-tigerr. tiger. just. tiger. hes so amazing and i honestly would die for him. i love him so much and just talking to him can make my day. i wouldnt be as happy and the sever wouldnt be as fun without him. and @reallyradrat server owner :) sammy im so grateful for sammys existence just.. overall. they made the sever. they wrote the add post. and they’re such a good friend. i cant imagine not having them in my life they’ve made such a difference. so just... thank you <3 and @tiredconfusedandgay!! cub!! i love them!! theyre such a joy to be around and them being in the server is such a lucky thing! it wouldnt be as fun and bright of a place without them and they bring so much every time and i love seeing them in chat everyday. and with leo comes @canofworms0 baby child. anni is so amazing. just overall. so happy and funny and just an amazing person to be around and im so happy to have them in the server. @lentil-darling !!! kittycat!!! i love them!! they're so amazing and have helped me through things on more than one occasion and I'm so grateful for that and for them. they're such a good friend and i always have such a good time whenever we vc! its honestly something i look forward to! and speaking of VCs @gayest-unicorn is amazing. VCing with them is so fun and i hope we can do it more often. and on top of that just messaging them is great! and they're puns (ouns ;)/ij)? FANTASTIC! i hate puns by most means but whenever they crack a joke it makes my day 4000 times better. he's just amazing and i think he deserves the world. cant say enough praise to him :) so i low key have to speedrun this bc im running out of time to type this but all of these people also deserve the world and i wouldnt know them if it wasnt for tumblr @smoll-lightning-bug  @totally-tater-tot @savemycrustysoul @a-broken-laptop @nantuckets-weaver @undead-mutt  @hufflepuff-pide-honey-badger @human331279 and just so so many more whos @s i didnt get or couldnt find. i am so grateful to have in my life because of this server and that post. that post literally changed my life forever and i cant imagine my life without it and without these people

3. a few months went by and i made some mutuals and friends and whatnot. my at the time friend irl then made an account. i was really excited! why wouldnt i be! friend made account! awesome! but another thing about that? i had a crush on them.. and they could now see my account. but fuck it it was a great trade off. we spent a lot of time sending each other asks and messaging while in quarantine and it was just great. then i saw an ask game and i rebloged it. i realized this ask game said “♻ are we a qpp or what?” as one of the asks. now im a coward and i could NEVER have done this outside tumblr in anyway but i took the chance. i sent them the post and said “you should rb this! you have followers that would interact im sure” and so.. they did. i sent the ask and they said yes :) five months later and we’re still dating. whos this amazing person? that my friend would be @mossofthecosmos the most amazing person ive ever met. theyre the light of my life and if it werent for tumblr i would still be a blushy, semi-verbal, embarrassed, mess around them. and we wouldnt be dating. i cant even imagine what that would be like. i love them so much and they make every day wroth living for me and if it werent for tumblr, i wouldnt have that. 

4. and ive made friends. so many of them. and i love them all so much! i dont talk to a few anymore but for the while we did they made my days and made me so happy. without tumblr i wouldnt have met @mimekyo or @books-andbiscuits who are both people that have made my life a brighter place! 

okay so i cried writing this and i cried HARD

bottom line nonie? this question is so loaded it took me three hours to write an answer and a stupid amount of words that no one will read all the way through

i cant put it into words but this website is one of the best things that ever happened to me and i cant imagine life without it 

[confessionsofa-roleplayer]

i was feeling burnout by a ship, but i respect the writing partner too much to not be honest, so i instead gave them a headsup i didnt have a lot of muse for some of our heavier threads and wanted to focus on the others. they appeared to be fine and understanding about it until a few days later they told me they were crying all night over it and having a breakdown, because they were afraid i was going to drop the ship.

on top of them admitting to that breakdown they've been getting really guilt trippy on dash. whenever i am gushing about my other ships, they post things like "oh when will [insert their muse name] be loved" or they will even straight up post that they miss certain events with muse or that they miss when "people gave their muse attention" ???

am i wrong to feel so uncomfortable? i truly love our ship but i do have burnout from it, and this clingy behavior is not helping. more distressing is the fact it's affecting them enough to cause them to have breakdowns is very worrying to me. i kind of want to step away but if simply wanting a break from certain plots was enough to make them cry irl then im scared to think what stepping away would do.

how do i address this?

This is a really tough situation to be in, anon. And no, I don't think you're wrong to feel uncomfortable with how your partner is handling the situation.

First - kudos to you for wanting to do the right thing and communicate openly with this person. I know making that choice isn't always an easy one, and even people you thought would handle things well, don't always manage to do that. But the fact that you're trying is important. If you were my partner, I'd appreciate it beyond words regardless of how things turned out in the end - so thank you for that.

How I would handle your current situation might go a few different ways depending on a lot of different factors:

     I might try talking to them again, if I thought they'd listen, but I'm also really wary about trying to tell anyone (even politely) what they should or shouldn't be posting on their blog. I'd also be worried that my own regret over needing to take a break (and their reaction to that choice) might be biasing how I interpret certain posts. I cannot tell you the amount of 'weird coincidences’ regarding posts and their timing I've seen during my stint on tumblr - things that seemed completely connected, but never really were. Anyway, trying to talk again is definitely an option, if you feel comfortable doing that.  Just try not to turn the conversation into a ‘threat.’  (“If you don’t stop doing this, I’m not going to want to ship at all anymore,” or anything similar.)

     Another option is backlisting their blog for awhile. Give yourself a chance to breath without unfollowing them (and potentially freaking them out even more.) The age-old saying 'out of sight, out of mind' has often worked wonders for me. It gives you a chance to take a break from their posts and just relax for awhile.  If they tag those kinds of posts a certain way, you could also try just blacklisting the tag/s they use.

     Another possibility (which might not be one you’re willing to do) is to back up a little and offer a little give.  I’m really wary about suggesting this because it feels like ‘rewarding bad behavior’ to me, but the situation is yours to handle, and if you like this idea, then that’s your call.  Let them pick one of the hiatused threads to pick back up.  Just one.  And make sure it’s clear that you still might not reply to it as regularly as everything else.

     Along similar lines, just because the two of you aren’t doing shippy threads doesn’t mean you can’t still share images / quotes / aesthetic posts / etc. that remind you of the ship or specific threads.  Whether you do it privately or via tumblr reblogs - this might be enough to reassure your partner that you still care about the ship, and that it’s still on your mind.

     And finally, if/when you feel that - regardless of how much you enjoy the ship/their friendship - continuing to write with them will do you more harm than good, then you need to tell them and step away. Yes, how it might affect them isn't a pleasant thought, but it’s not your job to help control someone else’s emotions.  Staying in a situation that no longer makes you happy just to keep someone else happy is rarely healthy.  If/when it comes to that, try to be as empathetic as possible when you tell them.  Make sure they know this isn’t a choice you’ve made lightly.  It’s also important (as gently as possible) to make them aware of how their own choices exacerbated the situation.  You don’t want to be, ‘This is all your fault!’ but if they don’t understand why you’re ending things, then they’re more likely to repeat the same mistakes with others.

Okay, I think I’ve exhausted my thoughts on your next possible step.  Do our followers have anything they’d like to add, or any other potential actions you think our anon could take?

~ Mod MJ ~

[starfruits-world]

CC Making Journal day 7- Collars, tailoring, transparent patterns, LODs.

Aka what started as a night full of hope and excitement over nipple lace button downs turns into bowling alley manager uniforms, tiramisu, irl shirt theft, screaming about paint buckets, and disappointment. Yuuri making his cute face is all I can stand. I didnt even go in game for this shirt I was so disappointed. 

First realization- when the mesh is ugly as fuck there is no saving the piece. Just start over. 

Second realization- half sleeve will never be flattering

No matter how these jazzy looking boy pose:

BUt I started off realizing this piece was not a simple 4 piece suit. No- it had many moving parts. So I made my first button down. The original piece had these hideous buttons:

I was pretty happy here.I had, after all, created my first button down with the two pieces n the back, the trim, collar, the whole 9 yards! A certain tofu loving dragon helped me find a collar pattern guide after they caught me blindly making the worst collar known to man on stream. Thank you for your guidance. (I also wasnt sure if the collar was 1,2,or 3 pieces so I stole a shirt from my dads closet. Its still on my bed. I may keep it. He doesnt need it anyway. Its so soft) We were still so naive though. Dofu tried to warn me about the weird sleeve length and frumpy sleeve holes. But I didnt listen. I was too busy screaming:

Yes I did a little peak at the stammi vicino possibilities. I felt so close.But then...

Then... 

It came to open it in S4s...

(at least the white swatch is clean)

And I was met with a huge disappointment. The shoulders are rounded hideously. and the collar stands up weird. And I cant for the love of me figure out where the sim waist pant line is on the Sims 4 male rig for MD. 

Basically I achieved the silhouette “Boy stuffs himself into a button down that is much to small for him” DX I mean if we wanna play chubby Yuuri it works. 

The waist UV didnt copy over from the sim so he has a different body shape. This keeps happening on tops I have partial transparency on so I think this is related to that issue. As I learn more I realize the issues on my cc are all fixable at their various step. Yuuris waist is supposed to be SNATCHED 

Okay some may think the shirt doesnt look bad on Yuuri, right? But I knew something was wrong....when I put it on Victor and his shoulder SUNK INTO HIS BODY: 

THIS IS WHAT HE IS SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE. 

Oh the disappointment I was met with. Victors beautiful broad shoulders. Decimated. 

(Oh speaking of decimate i managed to get this mesh to be under 12k and then I imported it into s4s it JUMPED TO 20K AND I WAS SHOOK LIKE WTF SO OF COURSE MY OTHER 3 LOD DECIMATES WERE ALL HUGE POLY COUNTS. NONE OF THEM NEAR 500 FOR LOD 3). I was annoyed but had bigger monsters with this piece.

Already deterred by some much disappointment, I almost didnt want to continue on. But I roped my friend in again and we went at the Lace texture. BC AS UGLY ASTHE MESH WAS, THE TRANSPARENCY WORKED. SO I failed the war but won the mission. We shared a few pic me up photos of our good boys and powered on. 

And then I found out in PS version 20 there is NO PAINT BUCKET TOOL.

After screaming over no paint buckets (silently bc my discord audio broke) we tried like 10 different methods. I tried to follow along but boyyyy I had no idea what mask laters or rasterize was. I dont even know how to rotate and combine photos in PS. I was in pain. Perhaps I am still traumatized. But not enough to not keep trying.

By then it was 3am and I had inhaled a piece of tirimisu cake to fend off sadness. I ate my late dinner from a paper plate like the sad bachelorette I am and watched again and again as my friend tried to explain how to make the transparency work. 

Eventually they got it to work. I did but I had the pattern too small. So it was useless. 

Anyway, I had to show SOMETHING so I tried Archive actions weird pants that I cant put on literally any outfit bc its clips awfully on the sim and BAM

CANT YOU JUST SEE HIM IN A BOWLING ALLEY?!?!? UGH

Anyway credits to StinkyDofu here on tumblr and the victuuri birb server, Otaku Sim server, random twitter followers who will not see this image or else my follower count will continue to drop, and NO THANK YOU TO HALF SLEEVED SHIRTS. 

Also heads up usually im not a negative person and wont be as harsh on cc to others as I am to myself. But this particular piece was started with such high expectations and the downfall really hurt. But, like I said, this is all for learning so I will keep going. I love this process fully.

It was calming, the boring parts of cc making. Lowering poly with edge loop deleting, extruding edges, uv mapping, texturing. I love the process no one wants to show in their time skips. 

I’ve already linked the tutorials I used in my last journal. So today i’ll advise yall to watch Grafity-cc on youtube for their great speed meshing blender. I would tag but I am but a measly peasant.

Also of course follow StinkyDofu, DroSims, and Poeticfalls for my sim inspo, teachers, and friend groups.