#anyway i'm also scared of bugs

[thesilverfullcr]

😃 - To me, you are easy to approach :D

oh that's good to hear. i know people can be hard to approach just out of one's own anxiety, especially cool people like me. B)

no but seriously, i'm an awkward and shy potato, and very bug-like in that i am more scared of you than you are of me. i promise.

[blujayonthewing]

pitched battle inside my brain between the part of me that's desperately shaking myself by the shoulders going "YOU HAVE GOT TO ACTUALLY LIVE THE KIND OF LIFE YOU IMAGINE INSTEAD OF JUST SITTING AROUND IMAGINING IT UNTIL YOU DIE!!" and the part of me that's clutching my face going "is this allowed? is this allowed?? is this allowed???"

[sun-marie]

i'm so sorry emmrich you are one of the coolest characters in this game and I am delighted every time you are on my screen, but Lydia is not on the same page 😭

Lydia: "emmrich this is cool and i like talking to you but can we please leave this graveyard that skeleton won't stop staring at me."

Emmrich: "rook, no spirit currently resides in that particular skeleton. it hasn't even moved."

Lydia: "right uh-huh but it's STARING at me"

[pine-arten]

guys the light deity is literally called light WEAVER ...... it makes sense to have pupa/grub dragons. they are weaving

[holydivers]

in a fascinating statement, municipal code says that outdoor plants must be... kept free of insects.

[astrxealis]

me rn having the biggest hots for leon kennedy and astarion sorry LMFAOOO <3

[tardis--dreams]

There's silverfish in this apartment so the only chance for my body to get some rest would be collapsing from exhaustion otherwise i will not sleep for a While

[emile-hides]

Oh my god I’m so so so sorry for like spamming on your other blog !! (o;Д;)o I did not realize how many posts I was liking/bookmarking until it was way too late D: And I was also borrowing my friend’s blog that she hasn’t used in a while, so I looked like bot or something else which probably freaked you out even more !! :C Again I’m really super sorry and I really hope that I didn’t scare you or anything like that !! (∩´﹏`∩)



YOU SUPER LOOKED LIKE A BOT FDGJKFDJGKDF IT'S FINE

I don't normally block people for like spamming but holy shit I thought you were just gonna go through my entire library of posts that freaked me out fjgjdfhjg I've unblocked the blog now though I just needed a way to force you to stop in the moment (but also Agender-Vampling should be blocked from view to those without their own account so you might not be able to find it again)

Wait.. If you were borrowing a friend's account why'd you follow me??? Thrice??? And WHY were you borrowing a friend's account???

[chocoholicbec]

@tkingfisher, this feels like a You thing. (It's definitely a Me thing.)

I’m the world’s worse advocate for wasps. Everytime I see people repeating bees=nice good pollinators wasps=bad stinging meanies, I face a deep internal struggle trying to explain how they are important to the environment without explaining wasp facts that freak them out in ways they never even thought

[valdevia]

Very funny that tumblr is having discourse about whether my art is misinformation or not, after I've been posting it all over the internet for years without any controversy. So let's talk about it!

I know people arguing are a vocal minority, but I'm not going to dismiss anyone's concerns. It's an actually interesting topic that I really consider, and it touches some important issues in society. So here's my (rambly) two cents.

My art is meant to misdirect, in some way. Photomanipulation and the tone I typically use are meant to briefly confuse the person reading it into thinking they're hearing a real story, at least for a few seconds.

The Intended Experience™

In this sense, I feel like my art can be misinformation! And it's not only people who don't think critically about things like "how come I never heard about mermaids being real before?".

So, no disrespect to anyone that fell for one of my pieces! My work plays with reality, so if you fell for it for more than a minute, it just means my tone and style worked a little too well for you! And there are legitimate reasons to be confused when you see something online, too. For example, there are people who can have trouble telling real and fictional things apart. When you post something that goes out to a million people, you'll get one million different reactions.

That's why I always take care to make it really clear, outside the main piece and snippet of text, that my art is no more than fiction. There are tags, the tone of my account, even my profile picture is meant to reinforce this. I also have a website which, in part, is meant to capture the clicks of people to wonder if my stuff is real and google it, so they can find a real source that's clearly an art website. You can try googling "mycelium infection 1806" or "pupillosarcoma" to see how my website tends to appear first.

If I get this comment I know I've done something believable!

But let's say, for the sake of argument, that my art wholly constitutes misinformation. What we need to understand is that misinformation is not the same as disinformation. Misinformation is just incorrect information. It's your grandma seeing a little bit of a found footage movie on TV and thinking it really happened. She might be spooked, but nobody is harmed. Disinformation is false information that's purposefully crafted and spread in order to cause harm, division, or further a political view.

Now I ask you: what real world harm does my art create? The worst that can happen is that a tiny percentage of those that see it get a little scared thinking a weird bug is real, or that mushrooms really grow on faces, or that scientists have released millions of trilobites into the oceans. Is that really that bad?

Anyway, that's my take on the topic! I'm obviously biased, but this being my style, I do put a lot of thought into it and I'm always open to people's opinions! (Just don't scream at random people on the replies or you'll get blocked!)

[unacknowledgeable]

SK!Reader x Yan!Batfam: Not in the plan

I have thoughts about the batfam going yandere before finding out about Reader being a serial killer.

Because if the fam go yandere before finding out, this gives them time to formulate their own perceptions of the reader, based on their limited knowledge of them and a lot of wistful thinking, so there's now an illusion built that can be shattered. 

It’d definitely be a slower roll into being yanderes, because they view the Reader as a full civilian and obviously don’t want to scare them off. They only really have the media's view of the Reader, and Alfred's view to make assumptions off of, which both are pretty biased tbh.

 They end up forming this version of Reader that is quiet but charming, social but reserved, irritable but kind, meek but shrewd, etc etc.

So they start off slowly, with little things, like Tim bumping into them on the street then offering to buy coffee, running into Steph while buying groceries, Jason waving at them from across a clubs dance floor, Bruce cutting in during their chat with Gordon at a Gala, getting “leftovers” from Barbara whenever she brings her dad lunch at the station, being asked for your math notes by Duke, Cass having Alfred give you tickets to her dance recitals, Damian entering rooms you’re in without making a snide comment, Dick inviting you to family game night–

The list of tiny ways they try to insert themselves is endless and every new acknowledgement from the family leaves the Reader fucking terrified.

Reader stares, bug eyed, at Tim for his offer, falls into a shelf at Steph's excited hello, downs a shot before running to the the club's bathroom to climb out the window when Jason tries to approach your seat at the bar, tripping a waiter to distract Bruce while you ditched the Gala, nearly back handing Barbara because you were listening to music and you didn't hear her come in, asking Duke ‘what math notes?’ ...while studying said notes, saying ‘no, you couldn't make the recital because you had to water a friends dog that day’ before quickly leaving the kitchen, throwing a book at Damian when he moved to close because the only times he’s ever been this quiet around you is when you're inevitably stabbed, or flinching so hard when Dick reaches out a hand to clap your shoulder, he thinks he somehow actually hurt you and the look of fear in your eyes gives off such a startling sense of deja vu, it leaves him despondent for the rest of the week.

 So now the batfam are thinking “Why the fuck are they panicking so much? oh god did we seriously fuck up so badly they're afraid of us?!?!?! DD: Why are they so uneasy??? It can’t just be because they’re estranged from them. Can it??” And now they're getting increasingly desperate to fix this because this wasn't supposed to be so difficult, but now it is and that's making it more intriguing and thus higher on the family’s list of priorities. 

Meanwhile… from the start, the Reader is just-

Because despite outward appearances, Reader is constantly paranoid as fuck. We’re talking Batman levels of paranoia. Hard not to be when he’s literally your dad. You have contingencies for your contingencies, escape routes by the dozen out of the city and out of this mortal plane itself, if needed. You had plans for every conceivable possibility, just not for this. 

You're now met with such a glaringly obvious flaw in how you go about life in general, the way you live and how you operate as a serial killer, it all hinges on the idea of the family never turning their attention your way. It wasn't even an option and now it’s happening and you had no idea how to function because this isn't normal at all. Now you're actually forced to put in more than 25% of brain power to bury any possible leads and dissuade any possible connections to yourself and the silent terror on Gotham, while also trying to figure out what the hell happened.

Safe to say, this cat and mouse game is no longer fun for you.

I'm meltingggg. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed, I'm going to bed bleh

X-X

Masterlist

[tiny-space-platypus]

Part 4 Miscommunication

(Damien's POV)

Previous

School had started now and a new kid came to the academy today. A girl roughly his age but a little shorter. This girl was loud and obnoxious, gathering quite a crowd of friends on her first day. That was fine though, Damian didn't exactly want to have to talk to another brainless civilian. Though Grayson did say he needed to make more friends. Explaining that not having friends would blow his cover.

Before Damian decided what to do the girl who was just with a group of his classmates was now behind him, startling him. Startling Him. Damian had been trained by assassins, by his mother, father, and siblings to always be acutely aware of his surroundings yet this girl scared him? Damian needed to understand how.

The girl who introduced herself as Dani Nightingale giggled.

Damian: "You startled me"

Dani: "yeah I do that"

Their classmates are cheering no one has ever managed to sneak up on Damian and now this new girl has. Great this girl was now going to be another nuisance to him. Then the girl frowned at him and apologized softly before avoiding him for the rest of the day. Odd.

Damian also found that this girl was very smart. She was great at science, math, and knew so many languages that it was just impressive. She was odd.

Dani avoided Damian for the rest of the day. She fucked up, she fucked up big time, even if he doesn't show it she can still feel his emotions. She wants to fall in for the floor and disappear but she can't do that. So instead she decided to focus on the school day. Answering and doing as much as she can to avoid Damian. The boy she accidentally made hate her. She can't wait for today to be over. The end of the day rolled around and Danny was there to pick her up. Just as she ran up to Danny, Damian did the same. Damian got to Danny first.

Damian: "Todd, what are you doing here?"

Dani running into Danny and giving him a massive hug. "Danny!"

Danny (confused) "sorry kid, but I'm not whoever Todd is?"

Damian now also confused and looking closely at Danny because his brother was laughing and smiling and not normal. Then he looked at the scars on the man's arms and neck and mannerisms. That wasn't Jason but just looked like him, odd.

Dick and Tim now confused that Damian didn't come to the car, walk over and react the same way Damian did though more extreme. "Jason??"

Danny (sighing): "No my name's Danny. Nice to meet you" (looks at Tim) "or re-meet you, how was your debate thing or whatever? I assume that was why you were in a suit?"

Tim (confused before remembering the coffee shop) "oh! Um yeah everything went well"

Dick smiling while internally screaming about seeing someone who looked like a happy version of his brother. "It's nice to meet you too"

Both Nightingales feeling the turmoil and odd feeling from the 3 and decided. Nope! Not my circus not my monkeys even if he does maybe look like he belongs to that circus. Not his, nope, they have enough problems, whatever this family has is not also his.

Danny: "anyways we've got to go, I'm sure we'll see you around"

Danny left with Dani and went home with her neither aware of the tracker Damian had left on Dani.

----------------------------------------------------------

Danny and Elle having a normal night doing homework, having dinner together, all that jazz while being watched by Robin and RR who had now taken a special in this family. Especially after Tim could find almost nothing on any of the Nightingales past a few months ago when they came to Gotham or when their sister went to Stanford. They watch Danny put Elle to bed then begin tinkering with a side project (he is an engineer after all). They seemed normal but something still bugged the both of them about the Nightingales. Something was still off, they'd have to keep investigat- Danny pulled out the 2 trackers that were were placed on both him and Elle and sat them on the table in front of him. He knew about the trackers. Maybe he was a threat.

Danny had of course found the tracker on him immediately and decided to fuck around making it go absolutely everywhere far too quickly till he realized where the tracker was from. It was shaped as a bat of course it came from Batman and his spawn. SIGH he supposed he couldn't avoid the bats and birds if they were already tailing him, might as well try to make friends first. The fact that they were looking for them was only solidified when he found another on Elle's school bag. 1) how dare they put one on his little sister. 2) who the hell put it there?? Was it suit boy again? Or was it one of the others? He'd have to tell Elle to be careful around them from now on. He'll have to be more careful now. Welp might as well try to reverse engineer these trackers so he can make something to scramble them when those guys eventually try again. He and to at least protect Elle.

(Things I thought of but didn't know how to add it yet soo)

Dani goes by both Dani and Elle depending on if her brother is around. Its confusing when they're both being refused to as Danny after all.

Tim is going feral because he can't find anything on them, like they didn't exist before this summer.

Oracle is also going insane because her cameras can't pick the two up. Every time she tries to focus on them the camera feed glitches out till they're gone.

The next part will be about Jason getting caught with GIW because they think it's Danny (and Elle maybe.) Still writing.

Next

[vintagecandy]

Now for the 1920s reimagining of Jonathan Crane ! sorry this explanation is even longer lmao

As everyone's been saying, I should do the rest of the Dork Squad to match 1920s Jervis, and so here is my Jonathan! Easily the hardest to draw out of the three-- but I must say! Despite being outside my expertise, I'm a little surprised how much it looks exactly like I was imagining! Even if it took me ages but that's just procrastination lmao.

Anyways! What is his deal? Well, for one, design wise I did go a more drastically different direction from his usual look by doing a literal scareCROW. He's much more bird like, with a plague doctor mask being common imagery in steampunk, but he's still very southern themed with his messy broken overall strap and patchwork coat. Even his wings are rustic. ( he can't fly just glide btw lol ) Also! I leaned hard into the color orange instead of his usual green gas because it..... bugs me that both Crane and Nygma have a bright green in their color palette. I just want them to have distinct colors if they're going to be a trio. And look how vintage halloweeny he looks !!

So why is he so well dressed out of costume? Well! This Jonathan Crane is not a psychologist at all, here he is the very successful grandfather of horror movies in the silent film era. ( An illustrious origin, i hope canon Crane would be proud lmao ). This is referenced in how his face looks, he's wearing white powder and black makeup that's usually meant to emphasize key features on blurry film like his upper lip and around his eyes. And yes, he just keeps his makeup on during most events, and people just accept he's a little on the... eccentric side.

To me, the archetype of the mad artist fits Jonathan's vibe perfectly. When it comes to striking fear, he's a perfectionist, a trait that drove him to learn every single skill necessary himself, from costume design to props to making his own cameras to mechanical engineering, to.... a "fear gas" that was supposed to gently encourage immersion in the audience but ended up becoming a dangerous chemical weapon.

For his origin crime I am thinking !! Full blown Scooby Doo style monster mystery!! With some nuance! Crane, as a first impression, gives off an immediate air of pompous, aggressively impatient, pretentious director type. His presence is big and dramatic, but its distinctly not southern-- in fact, he seems to play up something between a hollywood accent and a thespian one. But this is all to cover for his farm hick background that he was once very ashamed of.

As a child of a failing farmhand during an infamously dry and dusty era, Jonathan developed an extreme resentment for his country existence from both the bullying of other children for all his strange quirks and the severe verbal and physical abuse of his father, driven to alcoholism by the stress of poverty and the loss of his wife. Originally offering his artistic ideas as a means to help them, he grows sick of their closed mindedness and berating and runs away to learn about the emerging potential of film in Gotham City.

Its been many years, Jonathan now in his early 30s, he finds himself surrounded by the shallow, champagne aristocrats that reflect his childhood bullies. Feeling wrong in his own skin, he develops a sightly unhealthy obsession with the escapism he finds in performing as the monsters in his movies.

But upon discovering that the corrupt rich of Gotham plan to push legislation that would negatively effect farmers like his own history, and that they expected him to be amongst those who support it, his irritation with the shallowness of society reaches its limits. In day, he would feign support for their behavior to cover his tracks, but at night he would don the mask of the Scarecrow, rumored to be the vengeful spirit of a farmer who was hanged, and who he believes to be a more freeing expression of himself than his true face, targeting not just the rich but striking fear in their laborers to scare them off land. And it works. So, he tries bending the will of society more.

Is he doing this out of any moral conviction or just spite and a love for the role? It's... hard to say.

As the Scarecrow, his methods are so effective he's near uncatchable, even by Batman. Its only by solving the mystery of who is under the mask are they able to catch him. They surprise him during one of his screenings, jump him in the dark, and prove his subtle use of fear gas in the theater to the police once he's cornered. Instead of being angry, he goes to the mad house applauding Batman's performance.

What an interesting character they play. He's very inspired.

[cosmosluckycharms]

Bug like angel

pt2

Girl Afraid

May 12, XXXX

4:45 AM

"Shit," you think to yourself as you realize you're going to be late for school

Yes, your school usually doesn't start till 7 AM, but you have a field trip today, and the bus leaves at 5:30 AM.

"Ms.Rose is gonna kill me if I'm late again! Where did I put my bag? Where are my earbuds?" you whisper to no one in particular

You had a million thoughts running in your head, but one thing was sure, you were so late.

You still had to grab your phone, eat breakfast, put on your clothes, do your hair and makeup on the bus, and run towards the bus and then maybe you can make it in time.

You rush downstairs to get breakfast and realize you don't have to be as quiet because it's empty in the kitchen.

You quickly eat breakfast and finish your morning routine before making it out the door.

It's 5:43 when you make it onto the bus, Ms. Rose was waiting on you and thankfully didn't you much of a hard time.

"Ms.y/n, please be more considerate of others time next time."You sat down next to your "friends"

You don't fully consider them your friends, they're too full of themselves and you all know none of you guys are friends, just close acquaintances.

After finishing the coffee you brought onto the bus ride, doing your hair and makeup, and taking a quick nap while listening to music, you finally made it.

Alchemax.

You were excited for the trip, even asking Dick, Jason, and Bruce if they wanted to tag along as chaperones.

They said no, which you both understood and were also sad about but, whatever, who cares? Anyways- you're at the coolest place!

It's perfect for someone who wants an internship that would look great on your resume.

Why do you want that resume? You don't know. Maybe it's so you can impress your family? You aren't fully sure.

Before you question yourself further, you get off the bus, along with your schoolmates.

You hear them all chatting about whatever, but it's clear to everyone that you are the most excited to go on this trip.

You, who wouldn't shut up about it despite everyone at school and home telling you to. You, who kept bouncing off walls while talking about it. You, who constantly wrote about it in journals.

Nothing could stop your excitement, and that was clear to others.

While you were there, you were practically the only one participating.

The only one wasnt scared to ask questions.

The one that would ask questions for others who wouldn't.

You were sure that this was the best trip of your life! You were so interested in everything!

It wasn't until later in the day after you got home at 7:56 that you saw everyone in the dining room sitting together eating, like usual, without you.

Every time you saw them together your heart broke a little more.

You tried to not make a scene and just walk away quietly, and it worked!

With everyone but Alfred.

"And where have you been, young miss?" He asked in an authoritary tone.

"I've been on a field trip in Alchemax! I just got back! It was soo fun, why?" you asked, knowing what he was going to ask.

"Wouldn't you like to have dinner with the others?" it's clear he just wanted the others to notice you, he knew you've tried so hard to be with them.

"it's alright, Alfred. I grabbed lunch with my friends earlier, I'm still full!" you said enthusiastically. It wasnt a lie, afterwards you all went to your favorite fast food place, batburger. You're sure theres no better fast food place than batburger.

"Oh, that's quite alright then." as soon as he said that you went upstairs to get unready and unpack for the day. you didnt notice Jasons slight dissapointment on his face when you refused and walked away.

It's good that it was a Friday, you could rest tomorrow.

You didn't notice how you accidentally took Project 111 with you. Mustve sneaken in your bag while you went to the bathroom while at Alchemax.

It took you a while to open your bag due to you getting ready for bed, and you screamed when you saw a spider in your bag and crawling onto your hand.

"FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK STOP CRAWLING ON ME LEAVE ME ALONE WHERE DID YOU COME FROM GO AWAY!" the stupid spider kept crawling on you.

It's honestly suprising no one heard you scream. Either that or they didnt care.You didnt know what to do. You hate spiders.

It took you minute or two of just flailing before actually doing something.You tried to reach for your nearest hairbrush to hit the spider with, only to accidentally hit yourself anywhere but where the spider was. Thats gonna leave a mark.

The spider, project 111, ended up biting you on the wrist. You ended up killing it with your hairspray.

You started panicking on whether you would die or not, you may have cried a little before realizing you were being a tad bit dramatic.

You realized the spider didn't look like the venomous ones you researched online while trying to find common ground with Damian back when he was new

So you decide to keep this to yourself, a nice little secret.

3:37 AM

You woke up sweating, panicking, hot, cold, tired, wide awake, hungry, full, thirsty, not thirsty.

You didn't know what was happening.

You forced yourself to fall back asleep.

it's around 12 PM when you wake up again.

You hope it was just a weird nightmare.

You realize you woke up late to breakfast, which was usually at 9:30 for you, so on your desk was some cold breakfast Alfred left for you.

While eating it, you thought about what happened.

Was it a dream? Was it a sign? Were you high?

You start walking in circles trying to figure out what it could all mean...it took you a while to realize you were literally upside down on your ceiling.

Oops?

Before you processed it, you panicked.Why are you on the ceiling? Why were you walking on walls? How were you walking on walls?

So many questions. No one to answer them.

After a bit of panicking and running around making a mess, you realize you sort of have powers.

You could stick to walls, that was one.You could make webs, thats two. You could be a hero, like the others!

At first, you find it so cool!

..then you realized your father doesn't want metas in Gotham...

You decide to keep this to yourself, for now at least.

oml this is so short oops guys i swear im. tryigg my hardest but also im kind of a bad writiter 🙏

anyways the next one of these i make is most likely gonna be emu reader cause shes so silly

anyways

[callme-holly]

hiii! can u write headcannons for the greasers when you are on your period?

𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐝 [𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐝.]

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 - So sorry for my inconsistency when it comes to requests - I'm not working in any particular order but I will get to them all eventually! Anyway hope y'all enjoy and as always asks are still open for requests

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 - 901 words

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 - none

Darry Curtis - 

Darry would be so caring towards you, oh my lord.

If you need something, you best believe he is going to get it for you, among many other things. 

If you’re suffering with bad cramps, he will gladly lay with you and hold you for as long as you need him to. 

If the boys are bugging you in any way, shape or form, he is telling them to lay off and keeping you as far away from them as possible. He knows how annoying they can be first hand and the last thing you need right now is them all up in your face. 

He will come home from work during his breaks just to check on you and make sure you have everything you need; heat pad, blankets, snacks, entertainment. 

Sodapop Curtis - 

Much like his brother, Soda is super caring and sweet. 

He will go out and buy you everything you could possibly need; chocolate, medicine, you name it, babe, he’s getting it for you. 

Will take hot baths and showers with you after work. 

This boy will cuddle with you all day if that was what you wanted, hell, he’d take the day off work just to spend time taking care of you. 

If you’ve got cramps, he feels super guilty. He hates seeing you in pain and hates knowing that he can’t help you even more. 

Strongly believes that kisses will “cure” you and will shower you with attention until you’re feeling slightly better. 

Ponyboy Curtis - 

Pony doesn’t know much about periods other than the fact that you can get pretty damn moody. 

He tries his hardest to understand what you’re going through, but eventually he freaks out and has to ask Darry for help. 

If you need him to get you something, he will go into the store with the full intention of buying only the items you requested only to panic and buy almost every single product he could find. 

If you’ve got bad cramps, he’ll do his best to make you feel better. He’ll do whatever you need him to do but, in the end, he’ll just lay down and read to you until you fall asleep. 

Johnny Cade - 

Johnny is the sweetest. 

He gets so concerned about you and hates seeing you in any sort of pain/discomfort. 

If you’re sad, he’s sad. 

You want him to get you something? Medicine, chocolate, blankets? No problem, sweetheart, just sit tight and he’ll get it in no time at all. 

If you’ve particularly irritable, he tends to stay out of the way for a little while. He doesn't wanna upset you and he also doesn’t wanna get yelled at by you. 

He’ll cuddle with you for ages. When I tell you he isn’t letting go until you do, I mean it. 

If you’ve got bad cramps, he’ll lay with you and rub your stomach until they pass. 

He’s also not opposed to running you a warm bath if that’s what helps you.

Dallas Winston - 

When I tell you this boy knows nothing about periods, I mean it. His knowledge is very limited; he knows you get pretty moody and that’s about it. 

He’ll try to stay out of your way the best he can because when you’re on your period you kind of scare him. 

Once you snapped at him for being a pain in the ass and he never tried to bug you again. Instead, he went to find the gang and was like “damn, women can be scary sometimes, man.” 

He definitely showers with you but for all the wrong reasons. 

If your cramps are particularly bad he’ll get you blankets and will sit with you until they pass.

Either that or he’ll panic and call Darry. He does not know how to deal with this shit. 

Is definitely the type of person to say “can’t you just hold it?” 

Steve Randle - 

He’ll either take you to work with him or take the day off so that you’re not alone. 

He’ll let you sit in his lap whilst he rubs your back and presses soft kisses to your lips and forehead.

He’s actually so sweet to you. 

Will gladly feed you chocolate cake (he might steal a few bites too). 

Much like Soda, he has no problem taking hot showers with you if that’s what helps you to relax.

He will bring back whatever you want from the DX, just ask him and he’ll get it for you. 

If your cramps are particularly bad, he’ll just hold you until they pass. His comforting skills aren’t the greatest but he tries his best and we love him for it <333

Two-Bit Mathews - 

He tries to stay out of your way if you’re particularly irritable. He learnt the hard way not to bug you when you’re on your period and he vowed never to tease you again. 

He’ll cuddle up with you on the couch and you two will just watch TV together. 

Much like Steve, he has no problem feeding you chocolate cake, although he might end up eating the vast majority of it. 

Will pepper your face with kisses, claiming that it’s the only cure to your discomfort. 

If your cramps are bad, he’ll get you a heat pack and will do anything in his will to make you feel better. It doesn’t matter how ridiculous your requests may be, he will do it for you. 

𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬!!

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Spoing

Debut: Super Mario Galaxy

Spoing is a jumping spider! Though it's not quite a jumping spider, you know? Like how a lynx is a big cat, but it's not a big cat. You know. But even so, I would like to express my appreciation to real jumping spiders! With their extra conventional cuteness, they capture the hearts of even people who are scared of other bugs, and as such are ambassadors for the rest of spiderkind. A gateway to appreciating some other creatures, which some fools may call "less charismatic", as if it is not charismatic to, for example, dangle a blob of silk to catch moths like a little fisherman. Anyway, as president, I will make sure all jumping spiders are compensated for their services. In dollars.

I don't know if I'm just saying this because I've been replaying Galaxy recently and have a sort of recency bias, but Spoing really might be one of the cutest Mario enemies ever! We all know, we all love, the eyes-in-a-void face! And on a BUG? Yowza! I've seen that kind of face on crabs and sometimes bagworms (I think?) but I'm not sure I've seen it on any other arthropod, and ESPECIALLY not a spider. I don't know how Spoing would hunt. Would it just shove prey into the eye void? Is it also a mouth? That would be pretty awesome.

You know, their faces make them look kind of like funny astronauts... and they only have four limbs, not eight. Are these truly spiders? Were they once human, until something unspeakable happened? And will it happen to me someday? I hope so!

Spoings mainly appear in Space Junk Galaxy, which I think we on the Weird Mario Enemies Office Pizza Party Email Chain all agree is a really great galaxy, with impeccable vibes. It's space at some of its most lonely, as opposed to spectacle, and I REALLY appreciate the presence of spiders here. Spiders and their webs are always used to visually communicate the idea of a place or object being unused, abandoned. And this galaxy is just a bunch of forgotten debris, not inhabited by any sapient civilization! If moths are the mascot of empty wallets, spiders are the mascots of forgotten attics! Spoings to not seem to make webs, which, yeah, actively hunting spiders do not! But they might make Sling Pods. And Sling Pod Galaxy is... well, I don't want to use this post to criticize a galaxy that precious spiders may have had a part in designing. So I will move on to...

Name: Spangler

Debut: Super Mario Galaxy

Spoing's got an evolutionary relative, and rather than being a spider boing, this is a spider dangler! It at first looks like a recolor of Spoing, but it actually lacks the fuzziness of Spoing's abdomen, and it DOES have a big ol' spinneret, which it is always using to dangle on a silk thread! One big one, like a really long string cheese. These ones debut in Ghostly Galaxy, indicating that they are spookier than the more generalized Spoings. Is it the silk? Is silk Spooky? It is what ends up encasing the spider's prey... like a MUMMY! Maybe I'm on to something here!

I really like Spoing and Spangler, and that both exist! It may be sort of the same design for two different enemy behaviors, but they're both behaviors that make sense for the design, and it's a design I always love to see. It's like they're closely related species! Maybe a population of Spanglers was separated from the others and ended up in the more barren Space Junk Galaxy, where there was not nearly as much infrastructure to dangle from, and where only active hunting was a viable strategy. And over time, Spoings evolved from this population! Actually, maybe they even use the Sling Pods for hunting, when we're not looking, launching themselves at unsuspecting prey...

And just to make sure we're not appreciating fictional creatures over real ones too much, I should tell you that there is, indeed, a spider that slingshots itself at prey using its web. Sometimes reality is stranger than fiction. And it's often a spider's fault! The variety of ways in which different species use their silk is honestly one of the most incredible things in all of nature!