#anyway i took my add meds today. or as i like to call them my autism booster (sudden urge to bingewatch edd sorenson interviews again)

[camtankerous]

taking adderall when you have ADD and autism is basically just saying “i think i’m gonna let autism drive the car today”

[sgt-tombstone]

House Rules

Poly 141 || Explicit || 18+ MDNI!

CW: explicit sexual content, polyamory, free use

No one asked for this but I took my ADHD meds today so it got written anyway. This isn't beta read or proofread so ignore any mistakes (or tell me about them so I can fix them lmao)

Let me know if you guys want me to post this to ao3, it's not my usual fare but I'd be willing to post it if you'd like!

————

When Johnny officially started dating Simon, he knew that the other man was in an open relationship. He had never given polyamory much thought before--it had never held much appeal to him, and he always thought himself far too jealous to share his partner with anyone else--but with Simon, it was different from the beginning.

At first, he had missed the part of Simon's dating profile that indicated his relationship status, and by the time he finally did notice the little line--poly and partnered--Johnny had already made up his mind about the man. He was funny and sweet, sickeningly romantic, even as confined to the little dating app chat box as they were. There was no indication that Simon was looking to add another number to his polycule; he told Johnny outright, when questioned, that he was perfectly fine keeping their relationship neatly sequestered, separate from Simon's other relationships. He was attentive and devoted, never making Johnny feel needy or burdensome, even when Johnny took up entire hours of his time messaging back and forth, and Johnny often found himself forgetting that he wasn't the sole recipient of Simon's attention.

When they finally arranged an in-person meeting after a month of daily, sometimes hourly, back-and-forth, they simply... clicked. Johnny mocked Simon for his preference for tea, Simon affectionately tugged on Johnny's mohawk, and when they left the little coffee shop, neither of them wanted the bubble to burst just yet, so Simon tugged Johnny closer and led him to a nearby park. They strolled for hours, tucked against each other's sides to stave off the mid-winter chill, and Johnny marveled at how well he fit pressed against Simon.

Eventually, he got curious. Simon occasionally mentioned his other partners, always in passing, always casually, but always fondly. Johnny knew that there were two others--an older man named Price and a man close to Johnny's own age named Kyle, though Simon always called him Gaz--and he found himself more and more willing to meet them. More than willing, even. Eager. He wanted to know the people in Simon's life that made him so happy, wanted to be friendly with them, if not friends. So, four months after his and Simon's first date, he broached the subject and, two weeks later, he found himself sitting in the very same coffee shop, Simon at his side, Price and Gaz across the table, all four of them sipping on warm drinks and sharing warm laughter.

It felt easy. It felt right.

Over the next several months, the four of them went out increasingly often together. In public, they passed their foursome off as a double date situation--society had warmed up significantly to the idea of two men dating, but the four of them attracted more attention and questions than it was worth--and Johnny felt himself drawn to the other two men in much the same way he was drawn to Simon. Price and Gaz were easy and open with their affection for Simon and had welcomed Johnny into their lives, in any capacity he chose, with open arms. He supposed that was why it was called an open relationship. He didn't pry much into their personal relationships with each other; it was enough for him to know that Simon was happy, that Simon was surrounded by people who took care of him, that Simon loved him just as much as the other two men in his life.

Only when Simon broached the idea of Johnny moving in with him did he learn the whole truth.

'Free use,' Simon had said, and Johnny hadn't even known what that was. They had sat in Johnny's shitty flat, tucked together on the couch, TV on for background noise and empty takeout boxes strewn across the coffee table, and Simon had explained it. He lived with Price and Gaz, each with their own bedroom and bathroom, and they shared each other, whenever they wanted, as often as they wanted. There were house rules, of course, boundaries in place to keep everything safe and consensual, and if Johnny agreed to move in with them, he'd both be bound by those rules and have the ability to add his own, even going so far as to place himself off-limits if he wished.

For all of his hesitation, Johnny couldn't say that he wasn't intrigued. Or interested. There was something inherently compelling about the sense of freedom that Simon's explanation had conveyed. The more he thought about it, the more interested he became. He had always had some exhibitionist and voyeuristic tendencies, had always loved the thrill of the attention and the risk of getting caught, but he had never considered...

He took several weeks to think about it, which Simon enthusiastically supported, and during those weeks, he jerked off more often than he'd ever admit to idea. The thought of Price or Gaz walking in while Simon fucked him over the kitchen table, continuing a conversation with each other as if one of them wasn't getting railed right in front of them never failed to get him hard in record time, and he found himself moaning all three names equally often whenever he came.

Moving was made easy by four sets of hands instead of just one or two, especially when all four men were roughly the size of refrigerators with functional muscles to match. Their house was massive. Five bedrooms, seven bathrooms, a living room big enough to play hurling in, a kitchen that had seemingly jumped straight out of an interior design magazine, and a backyard framed entirely by privacy fencing and several rows of bushes tall and thick enough to shield the entire property from prying eyes.

The first night he was there, all four of them sat down at the kitchen table over dinner and explained the house rules:

everyone wore a colored bracelet at all times. Green indicated a willingness to engage in free use, though that consent could always be revoked. Yellow indicated the desire to be present and watch, but not the desire to be an active participant. Red indicated off-limits, which meant that no free use could take place when they were in the room.

the kitchen was off-limits, especially when someone was actively cooking

if a door was closed, that room and everyone in it were off-limits unless someone was specifically invited in

everyone in the house got STD tested once per month as well as before and after every sexual situation with someone outside of the house

There were others, mundane rules that Johnny had lived with enough roommates to feel comfortable with the gist of; everyone pitched in with chores, everyone contributed equally to utilities, and everyone kept the noise to a minimum, with a few obvious exceptions.

The first night was calm. Simon led Johnny back to his room, since Johnny's wasn't fully unpacked yet, and handed him his three bracelets, tucking the red one securely in place around his wrist.

"You can take it off whenever you like," he said, "but keep it on until you're comfortable."

They moved around each other effortlessly, changing into sleep clothes and getting ready for bed. Simon pulled Johnny under the covers, kissed the top of his head, and they both fell asleep wrapped in each other's embrace.

Johnny woke up alone, warm sunlight streaming through the window, and the events of yesterday flashed through his mind. He didn't even try to smother his grin. As he opened Simon's bedroom door, intent on making himself a cup of coffee, he was greeted with the unmistakable sound of someone getting fucked within an inch of their lives, their moans drifting up the house's staircase, and he quickly exchanged his red bracelet for yellow.

When he reached the bottom step and turned to the kitchen, his jaw dropped at the sight. Price had Gaz bent over the kitchen island, both stark naked except for their bright green bracelets, Price's cock buried to the hilt in Gaz's ass. Simon stood on the other side, clothed in a soft black shirt, black boxers, and a yellow bracelet to match Johnny's. His elbows were braced on the counter out of morning laziness instead of sexual pleasure, and he held Price's gaze easily as they chatted. Every once in a while, one of them would sip from the steaming mugs next to them, or Gaz would let out a truly pornographic moan, but for the most part, it looked utterly domestic, as if it were entirely normal, their usual morning routine. With a jolt, Johnny realized that it was and now, it was his too.

When Simon noticed him standing in the doorway, his eyes automatically flicked down to his wrist, checking the color of his bracelet before his face split in a grin. Johnny knew it wasn't a reward for changing it; Simon would've grinned at his arrival even if he had been wearing a red bracelet, but it felt like warm validation in his chest nonetheless.

"I made you coffee," he said, pushing himself upright and nudging one of the mugs across the marble counter. His words drew Price and Gaz's attention, and they turned to greet him with warm smiles of their own. Gaz even raised his head slightly, lifting a hand to wave lazily before his eyes rolled back in his head in tandem with one of Price's slow thrusts. Johnny stepped fully into the kitchen, tucking himself easily against Simon's side when the man raised his arm in invitation. He sipped the coffee and groaned at the taste.

"Good?" Price asked, and Johnny nodded.

"Better be," Simon grumbled good-naturedly. "Spent a bloody fortune on that coffee maker, old man."

"Switch that bracelet out and I'll show you how old I am, you muppet," Price said with a laugh.

"Might take you up on that," Simon said, the arm wrapped around Johnny's shoulders tightening as his eyes hazed over slightly.

"Speaking of age," Gaz mumbled, "I'm not getting any younger here."

"Poor baby," Price cooed. "You just woke up, don't tell me you're tired already."

"Tired of you yappin' instead of puttin' your fuckin' back into it," Gaz slurred, earning a chuckle from the three men standing around him. Johnny choked on his coffee when Price dropped one of the hands on Gaz's hips to wrap around Gaz's cock, hidden by the countertop but Gaz's deep, drawn-out moan was unmistakable. Price's thrusts sped up, too, each slap of his hips against Gaz's ass pulling a breathless whine out of the younger man. Saliva pooled on the countertop where his cheek was pressed against the cool marble, his mouth open in a desperate attempt to draw in as much oxygen as possible while Price did his level best to punch every air molecule from his lungs with his cock alone.

It was the hottest thing Johnny had ever seen. By the time Gaz came with a high-pitched keen, Johnny's coffee was entirely forgotten and he was hard in his sweatpants. He didn't notice how heavily he was breathing until Simon's hand came to rest at the nape of his neck, his nose finding the sensitive spot behind his ear.

"Alright, Johnny?"

Johnny could only nod, transfixed by the sight in front of him. Price pulled out and dropped to his knees, pulling Gaz's cheeks apart with his strong hands, undoubtedly checking for any injuries. He soothed Gaz's displeased whines with slow, firm strokes of his palms against the man's ass and thighs, then stood and pulled Gaz upright.

"Gonna get this one in the shower," he said, obviously directing his words towards Simon and Johnny, but his attention never wavered from the man in his arms.

Once they disappeared up the stairs, Johnny half-turned and half-collapsed against Simon, resting his temple against the taller man's collarbone, sharp even through the soft shirt.

"Jesus wept," he swore, and Simon chuckled as he pressed a kiss to the top of Johnny's mohawk. "Is it always that..."

"Hot?" Simon guessed. "Usually, yeah."

Johnny didn't know how he was going to survive.

Over the course of several months, he settled into the routine of the house. There was a clear dynamic, one that he quickly found his place in. Gaz and Price had been the original couple, so they were the most comfortable with each other, and they could usually be found wrapped in or around each other. It wasn't out of the ordinary to find Gaz cockwarming Price as the older man talked on the phone or folded laundry, and it was equally common to find Price bent over the back of the couch, impaled on Gaz's cock as the younger man played video games. Simon had been the newest addition before Johnny, and it was obvious that Price had been the one to bring him into the fold. He exclusively bottomed for Price and exclusively topped for Gaz, and both left him sated and satisfied.

As for Johnny... he found his niche in being anything anyone wanted him to be. He and Simon had already found their rhythm as switches, so he was completely unsurprised by Simon's preferences in the house, even if he didn't adhere to the same strictness that Simon did. He had no qualms about eating his breakfast around the broad span of Gaz's shoulders as the man squirmed in his lap, nor did he hold any reservations about letting Price sink to his knees to take him in his mouth as he and Gaz played mario kart in the living room. The first time that Simon had seen Price submit so easily to Johnny had been the single most erotic afternoon of Johnny's life and had left him unable to walk without limping for several days.

He spent most of his time with Simon, the two of them sleeping in the same room more often than not, but he maintained his own space, curating his bedroom to his own tastes, ensuring that he always had a comforting place to retreat to if he needed to. Whenever any of them wore their red bracelets--a fairly frequent occurence, Johnny learned, considering his own slowly growing sense of comfort and the collective traumas of all four of them--the entire house simmered down to calm domesticity. They would play video games or watch movies, fully clothed but often pressed together in a puddle of limbs and warmth. Johnny learned that they were all hopelessly competitive, which led to some borderline violent game nights, but they always ended in laughter and soft kisses pressed to developing bruises gifted by flying elbows and knees. Strip poker was their favorite game, when everyone was wearing their green bracelets, and Johnny very quickly learned that he and Gaz would never stand a chance against the two older men, which was often more fun anyway.

A year after moving in, Gaz came home one day with a blinding grin that only got wider when he caught sight of Johnny reclined on the couch, his back pressed against Simon's chest, his legs spread obscenely over Simon's thighs. Simon's cock was nestled firmly inside of him and his arms were wrapped firmly around his bare chest, both of them holding video game controllers and focusing intently on the TV. Price was knelt between both pairs of their legs, his arms on either side of their thighs, his mouth wrapped around Johnny's cock, warming him just as well as Johnny was warming Simon.

At the sound of his entrance, Simon and Johnny paused their game and looked up, smiling in greeting. The look on his face, though, piqued their interest, and Simon raised a questioning brow.

"I went on a date today," Gaz said, unable to wipe the grin off of his face. "His name is Gary, and I think you guys will really like him."

Price lifted his head, pulling off of Johnny's cock with a lewd pop, and wiped his mouth and mustache with the back of his hand before turning to Gaz.

"You thinkin' about introducin' us?"

"I'd like to," Gaz confirmed. "We have an extra bedroom..."

"Is this how quickly you wanted to adopt me after our first date?" Johnny asked, turning his head to press the question into Simon's temple.

"Yeah, pretty much," Simon replied with a shrug. "Took you a bit to come 'round to the idea, but we were willing to wait for you."

"What do you say, lovebirds?" Price said, turning to the two men on the couch. "Open to adding to our numbers?"

"Five's a good number, sir," Simon said.

"Five's my favorite number," Johnny added, and Gaz held up his phone with a giggle.

"I'll invite him out for coffee," he said eagerly, his fingers already flying over the keyboard. As soon as the text was--presumably--sent, he tossed his phone onto the carpeted floor, toed off his shoes, and collapsed onto the couch. Simon resumed their game and Price resumed his cockwarming, causing Gaz to groan.

"You guys are no fun," he complained. "Left me with nothing to do."

"Play with us," Johnny said, motioning to the spare controller on the table. "If you win, I'm sure Price would be willing to give you a prize."

He felt Price's groan more than he heard it as Gaz scrambled to connect the other controller, easily falling back into their good-natured competitiveness, and he wondered--not for the first time--how he got so lucky. He had three partners who adored him and each other, who were devoted to taking care of him and each other. He had one cock inside of him, had his own cock inside someone else, and would probably have more than that by the end of the night, if Gaz's hungry gaze was any indication. Before long, there would likely be a fifth, because Gaz was an excellent judge of character, and if he liked someone, the rest of the house was sure to as well. Johnny couldn't wait.

He tilted his head to the side, catching Gaz's eye, and the two of them had the same thought at the same time. Johnny paused the game, ignoring Simon's sound of distress in favor of tossing his controller to the side and tangling his fingers in Price's hair, the only warning he got before Johnny was flexing his hips, simultaneously lifting himself off of Simon's cock and pushing his own deeper into Price's throat. Simon's disappointed groan morphed quickly into one of pure lust as Gaz surged forward to lick into his mouth. Johnny set a brutal pace, alternating between fucking into Price's mouth and sinking deep onto Simon's cock with every movement. It felt like heaven, especially with the sound of Simon and Gaz panting into each other's mouths in between kisses just behind him.

Simon and Gaz let their hands wander, over each other, over Johnny, and then their mouths started wandering too. Lips pressed against any bare skin they could reach, which was a lot, and he threw his head back against Simon's shoulder, baring his neck and giving them more room to work, which they took full advantage of. Gaz worked his way down Johnny's chest, licking and sucking every inch of skin from his neck to his hips, paying close attention to his nipples and the sensitive skin just above his hipbones. Simon, meanwhile, laved his tongue over the back and side of Johnny's neck, latching on like a vampire, leaving dark bruises in his wake.

When he came, it was down Price's throat, clenching tightly around Simon's cock, moaning into Gaz's mouth, and he'd never felt more cherished in his entire life.

[moralesmilesanhour]

'cold turkey' but i rewrote it - part two!

summary: the festivities have begun! but you forgot the drinks. whoops. wc: 2k+ a/n: I almost cut this short at like a thousand words but I knew in my SPIRIIITT that I wanted to add more twists and turns to this thing. It's a bit rushed but let's just say I'm very glad I did! if you feel like it: comment your favorite holiday-related dishes :) part one part two

“Traffic was nuts today,” your older sister Alanna sighed as she hauled a carton full of cans of soda over to the kitchen. She looked up and saw Miles, who smiled and gave her a quick wave. “Oh my god, Miles?”

“One and only,” he replied. “Been a minute, ain’t it?”

The woman set the carton down on the floor. “When did you get so big? You're taller than me!”

Miles shrugged. “Growth spurt.”

“Alright then, nice seeing you,” Alanna turned and joined you on the couch with that glint in her eye and smirk that appeared only when she was scheming. “He’s mad cute now, right?”

You rolled your eyes and sighed, “ ‘Lana, no. Not happening.”

“Come on, I’ve seen the niggas you been with and he’s literally your type–”

“Can you lower your voice? He’s right there!” you yell-whispered. 

You craned your neck to see if Miles was listening. His head was down, all focus seemingly directed towards cooking beans. 

You turned back towards Alanna. “Anyway, he’s Jeff’s kid. I don’t want beef with Jeff or his mama if we break up. They literally live around the corner, do you know how awkward that’s gonna be?”

“So pessimistic,” Alanna’s lips were upturned into a pout. “How you just met him and you already imagining the breakup?”

“I’m being realisti–”

“The beans are done!” Miles’ voice interrupted. 

You called out, “That’s great, thank you so much! I’ll see you later this evening?”

He emerged from the kitchen and began to put on his sneakers. “Yup, lookin’ forward to it,” he stood up and made direct eye contact with you as he smiled. “Good luck with med school.”

With that, Miles grabbed his jacket off of the hook by the entrance, and left.

Your sister watched the door shut behind him with a satisfied grin. “He likes you.”

“No he don’t,” you retorted, keeping your eyes glued to your socks. “You want him to like me.”

The image of fluttering lashes and the scar on his cheek returned to you. How Alanna could tell even without her knowing about that little encounter was a mystery.

“Well, either way, do what you want,” she rose from the couch with a sigh of resignation. “I’m just saying he seems sweet. Now, help me decorate, and I’ll let you make the playlist after.”

You perked up at the thought of having DJ privileges and hopped to your feet. “You got it!”

-

Only half an hour had passed since relatives and family friends began trickling in, but you were already exhausted. One more inescapable hug and barrage of questioning, and you swore you’d have a breakdown. 

Ding dong!

“I’ll get it!” you announced, narrowly escaping being accosted by one of your aunts as you made a beeline for the door.

It was Miles again, this time with company.

“Welcome back,” you greeted Miles and stepped back to open the door wider. “Hey Mr. and Mrs. Morales!”

“Y/N! It’s been so long, tú eres tan guapa!” Rio Morales briefly took both of your hands in hers before entering, tugging Miles along with her.

Jefferson Morales was the last to go inside. His warm smile was a stark contrast to his wide, imposing frame. “I see Miles didn’t burn your kitchen down,” he laughed heartily. “He wasn’t too much trouble?”

Not in the way you were expecting.

You shook her head politely, “No, not at all! He even helped me finish dinner.”

Jefferson’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Well, that’s good to hear. We really appreciate the invite.”

“No problem,” you nodded as you shut the door.

“Y/N!” Alanna rushed up to you not a moment later, looking mildly panicked. “Do you remember where you put the drinks? The alcoholic ones, I mean.”

Your eyes widened. “Fuck, I think I forgot to buy them.”

“...Now, your mother was going to nursing school at the time, so she had to…”

Jefferson’s deep voice carried over the music, catching Alanna’s attention. He stood near the tin of mac and cheese telling a story that–judging by the look on Miles’ face–he had told several times before.

That same smirk from before spread across her lips. ‘Do what you want’, sure, but a little helpful push wouldn’t hurt.

“Miles, do you wanna help out Y/N again? She forgot to go out and buy drinks.”

He perked up, relief written all over his face. “Yeah, it’s no problem! I’ll drive her.”

You narrowed your eyes at your sister, but didn’t push back. “That’s cool with me. I’ll go get my sweater.”

-

You squeezed your fingers nervously as Miles turned the key and brought the car roaring to life. 

What could you possibly say to him? ‘Hey, so we almost kissed earlier. Thoughts on that?’ 

“What kinda drinks y’all need?” his voice ripped you away from your thoughts as he pulled onto the road. 

You didn’t answer, your eyes fixated on the motion of his hands spinning the wheel.

“Y/N?”

You blinked.

“Huh?”

“What kind of drinks are we looking for?”

“Oh, um, wine and cider and shit,” you waved a hand in the air, “Stuff that goes with turkey.”

“Cool.”

The ride was quiet, largely because you were busy racking your brain trying to think of something–anything–to fill the silence with. You’d already asked about school, and you knew Miles’ parents. But what about him?

He stopped at a red light, drumming his fingers on the wheel.

“So what do you do, like, outside of school?”

You winced. Small talk was not your forte.

Miles didn’t seem to mind though, appearing deep in thought before he answered, “I draw, when I got the time. Sing a little on the side.”

“I believe you. You look like you have a nice voice.”

An impish smile played on his lips. “Is that your way of saying I’m cute?”

“I…” the words were trapped in your throat. Part of you didn’t want to tell him the truth outright, but he was smiling at you and the sparkle in his eyes made you feel funny. 

“Maybe. Don’t get your hopes up, though.”

He raised an eyebrow. “So there’s a low, but non-zero chance.”

You snorted, “Alright, physics major. The light’s green.”

“Oh, shit. Thanks.” Miles focused his attention back onto the road and continued driving.

You didn’t say anything more for the remainder of the ride, but he caught you staring at him every now and then through the rear view mirror, curiosity written on your face.

Soon enough, he pulled over in front of the supermarket.

“Think you’ll find ‘stuff that goes with turkey’ in here?”

“I hope so,” you laughed, unbuckling your seat belt, “My sister’s gonna put me in the dirt if I don’t.”

“Well, good luck!”

Miles unlocked the door, and you set out on your mission.

Luckily, it only took you about twenty minutes to locate a bottle of moscato and some hard apple cider. Just as he saw you emerge from the double doors, though, a familiar buzzing in the back of his head tipped him off.

Really? On Thanksgiving?

A man wearing an inconspicuous black ski mask and hoodie stood waiting by the entrance, ready to strike. 

“Yo, empty your pocke–”

Miles swung into action the moment he spotted the gleam of a firearm.

You yelped as a string of white web shot out from seemingly nowhere and yanked the gun from your assailant’s hands. 

“It’s the holidays! C’mon, man!” 

“Spider-Man?” Your jaw dropped at the sight of the masked hero. 

He was perched on top of a low building right next to the supermarket, only his white eyes and the bright red streaks lining his suit visible in the pitch-black of night.

“At your service, ma’am!” 

With a quick salute, he was gone as suddenly as he’d appeared. Like, literally gone. You didn’t see him leave.

You let out a deep exhale and made your way back to Miles’ car, but you couldn’t see him in the window. A pit began to form in your stomach, until a voice made you jump.

“Hey, you alright?”

It was Miles, who had somehow appeared at your side without a sound. He was out of breath, leaning his elbow on the side of the vehicle for support.

Your eyes narrowed. “I’m…fine. Are you okay? Where’d you go?”

“Bathroom,” he lied. He pointed towards the bags you were holding. “Need help with those?”

You handed them over without a second thought. “Definitely. You know this nigga almost robbed me outside the store just now? Then, right as he’s about to pull a gun on me, guess who shows up?”

Miles grinned knowingly. “Spider-Man?”

“Showed up quick as hell! Even on Thanksgiving, can you imagine?”

“Crazy.”

He opened the door to the passenger’s side for you to get in. 

“Thanks.”

Miles did a slight bow, allowing you to catch a flash of red and black peeking out from beneath his jacket. You had assumed that he was wearing a turtleneck at first, but upon closer inspection–

“At your service,” he said with a grin before making his way over to the driver’s seat.

As you shut the door, Spider-Man’s voice returned to you.

At your service, ma’am.

The rest of the way home, you replayed both sentences in your head, alternating between the two and replaying the night’s events.

Miles had just so happened to reappear mere seconds after Spider-Man had said the words. They even shared an accent. You considered the absurd possibility for a moment; the police chief’s son being the masked vigilante would make quite the headline, almost poetic in its irony. 

Too poetic.

But just as you were about to let it go, Miles went over a speedbump, causing a jolt that made something begin to slip out from his jacket’s right pocket.

Black, red and white.

You pondered how to broach the subject once he pulled up in front of your house, when a lightbulb went off in your head.

Reaching over to the red button that released your seatbelt, you pressed it halfway, over and over again.

“Miles, I think my seatbelt’s stuck. Help me out?”

Miles removed his own with a click. “Sure, lemme see.”

He leaned over and reached the passenger’s seat with ease. His breath hit the side of your neck as he moved closer, making your heart rate quicken, but you maintained focus.

What mattered was that he was in close quarters. You had to see the suit.

“Got it,” Miles said once he released your not-actually-stuck seatbelt. “You’re free–”

Before he could move any further, you grabbed the collar of his jacket and unzipped it halfway.

“I knew it!”

The look of sheer terror on Miles’ face sealed the deal. Here was Spider-Man, in all of his glory.

“Are you…gonna…tell anyone?” 

His voice was hushed as he spoke. Almost small. You looked into those round, glassy eyes and felt a wave of guilt. 

“I–no, of course not,” you shook your head. “I just…I needed to be sure.”

He relaxed, some of the humor returning to his face. “And now that you’re sure?”

A cheeky grin spread across your lips.

“I guess I should thank you.”

You tugged at his collar one more time and brought his lips crashing against yours.

After getting over the initial surprise, Miles brought a hand up to caress one side of your face and deepen the kiss. Your other hand reached up and brushed the cold metal of one of his stud earrings before you snaked your arm around his neck.

Miles was the first to pull away, zipping his jacket back up.

“I don’t think I can stay in this position for that long,” he smiled. “We gotta get back inside with these drinks.”

You sighed, head still pounding with adrenaline. “You’re right, let’s get outta here.”

By the time you made it up the steps, Alanna was already holding the door open. She gave your face a good once-over and stifled a laugh.

“Did you two have fun on your little adventure?”

You took one of the bags from Miles and held it up like a trophy. “Yup, mission accomplished.”

“That’s not what I meant, baby,” she gestured towards her lips and mouthed “your lip gloss.”

Your eyes widened as she snickered, and let the two of you in. 

“Don’t worry, we’ll fix it in the bathroom. Hurry up!”

A few makeup wipes and a liner touch-up later, you emerged from the bathroom just in time for dinner.

Out of all the chairs strewn about the living room, you ended up seated between Miles and Jefferson. The former kept quiet, save for the occasional joke or wink thrown in your direction. Jefferson kept inquiring about your studies, which would then bounce back to Miles’ studies, which Miles then would somehow deflect back to you. Any and all conversation with Jeff became awkward, considering you had just made out with his son.

The party ending felt like a weight lifted off of your shoulders.

You stood at the entrance, waving goodbye to the steady stream of guests as their conversations stretched on, even from their cars. The Morales family were the last to leave.

After his parents went down the steps, Miles stopped in front of the door.

“Hey,” he smiled and tilted his head.

“Hey. You ready to go? I’m not letting you stay the night,” you teased.

“Wasn’t planning to, I promise. I just wanted to ask…” 

He shoved his hands into his pockets. “When are you goin’ back to campus?”

“Monday.”

Miles winced, “Damn.”

“I know, I literally gotta start packing to-night! It’s a nightmare!”

“In that case,” he took out his phone, and held it out to you gingerly. “Can we keep in touch?”

You accepted the offer, rapidly entering your digits and saving them under your name. “Worried about me spilling your secret identity?”

“Absolutely. I gotta keep an eye on you from now on. Like witness protection, but backwards–”

“Miles, vamos!” Rio called out from a distance.

“I’m coming, mami!” he replied before turning back to you. “See you winter break?”

You planted a kiss on his cheek. “Maybe. Non-zero chance.”

"I'll take it."

[stellacadente]

so like having memory issues sucks sooo bad

i lost 2 umbrellas in like. 2 or 3 weeks maybe a month (you guessed it i can't really remember. passage of time is so hard) bc it rains, i use this neat little umbrella.... put it down at the bus stop just for a second so i can get something from my backpack and completely forget i ever had it and hop on the bus without my neat little umbrella! fuck! my mum bought me this one (i didn't lose the previous one tbf.. it broke)! so then a couple of weeks later, still without an umbrella bc yeah, i keep forgetting to buy a new one, i have to be out all day, and it's raining hard and will all day, so my mum offers to give me her umbrella. she doesn't really need to walk or anything today anyway. i'll give it back later. yeah right. except i enter the place where i have to take my driving license quiz, i put down my umbrella, right there at the entrance, and when i walk out later it's not raining and i have completely forgotten i ever had an umbrella with me. my mum's umbrella. which i leave there. bye bye to another umbrella. i tell my mum a few hours after i realize... i was scared she'd get mad. she gets mad. how can you forget this stuff all the time. just think about these things a little more. just pay more attention. ah. right. as if that's easy. i tell her! it's not easy! i feel awful about this, i feel awful every time! i'm frustrated. i want her to understand i don't do this bc i don't care about my or other people's things or don't pay attention to them. i tell her look, every time i get to work i go upstairs to refill my water bottle. then i get coffee and/or chat with coworkers. i put my water bottle down, i need my hands to get coffee. and every time. every. time. i go downstairs and realize i left my water upstairs. i curse myself, i groan, i tell myself come one nico, you must remember later/tomorrow. i almost never do. my mum sighs and laughs awkwardly. yeah, mum, i know, i'm not even 30 and my memory's already fucked. i must have some problem, i say. it's only half a joke. i know i do. she half-jokes too, oh that's for sure, haha. i just don't know which one the many problems i do in fact have are to blame for this. is it the abuse and trauma? the bpd that was the result of it? the many meds i've taken for the bpd and all the rest? the times i've abused those meds? all of those, something else? i don't know. i just know it's hard to feel like everything, from memories to objects to knowledge, is a second away from being lost to me. always. few things feel like they last. and as a person who's obsessed with forever, as a person who loves to learn and know and watch and read and listen, as a person who cares even too deeply sometimes... i feel like i lost myself every day. if myself even exists. what am i when i don't remember most of my life? when i've forgotten almost everything about people who mean the world to me, bc they've been gone for so long? i forget birthdays, i forget ages, i forget umbrellas, i forget unloading the washing machine, i forget i already told you this, i forget smiles, i forget movies, i forget things i studied, i forget i had to call, i forget i needed to add something to the guidebook, i forget if i already took my med or not, i forget my favorite concert, i forget my favorite book, i forget. i forget again.

yesterday i went on a rant on the discord server i'm in with my friends, even if i knew it wasn't likely anyone would see it, bc the server's not very active now and that channel especially, no one looks at it. but i was so so scared i'd forget what happened the other day and even worse would start doubting whether it all happened for real or i made up half of it to make up for voids in my memory. that happens often with stuff like that. the therapist i had my first appointment with was very weird about me being trans and i kept thinking about it and feeling bad and the more i think something over, something i'm upset about, the more i get scared that i'm not recalling things right. so i had to write it all down somewhere other people could, even just potentially, see, and i could look back on. i mean yeah, i also did need to talk about it, so it would've been nice if someone read and replied too, but it's okay, i just at least needed to put it down in words as soon as possible.

i guess i'm just scared it'll get worse and worse the more i age and it's already pretty bad now and yeah

[mangled-by-disuse]

I want to try a new motivation/self-esteem thing, and since it's quarter to one on a worknight and I just got out of the bath, this is mostly a reminder to myself.

This is by no means an original idea, I'm mostly cadging off what works for me in project planning and workflow stuff professionally, as well as the fact that "streaks" as a concept really work for me (witness my current 1,682 day streak on Duolingo, for example. also the daily creativity thing has been doing wonders to help me out of the November rut, solely because I don't like breaking my streak.)

I've tried a lot of things before where I track myself and measure myself and hold myself accountable, and they've usually worked! but I also tend to end up dropping them eventually because the act of measuring itself takes too much time. so I think I need to simplify. on which basis:

Every morning, I want to set myself 1-5 "success criteria" - these need to be bounded, completable tasks (i.e. it can't be "get better at this" or "work on that"), they need to be practical to how I feel that day, and they need to be clearly defined and written down. Basically, SMART deliverables. Under no account am I allowed to set more than 5 of them.

I am not allowed to add to my success criteria throughout the day. However, if I've made a good-faith effort at one of them and outside circumstances mean it's no longer possible (for instance, if one of the criteria is "make this phone call" and the person I'm calling doesn't pick up or have an answering machine), I am allowed to strike that off the list.

At the end of the day, I go back to the list, and if I've done all my things for the day, I can mark that as a successful day, regardless of how much or how little else I've done and regardless of how I feel about it.

I want to measure successful days on a calendar, probably get some stickers or something eventually.

The hope is that this will force me to set actually achievable success criteria for myself - I'm very good at setting goals, but I tend to set them too high, and then even though I often reach them, I still feel bad about how much of a struggle it's been. I also tend to set myself a schedule at work that's motivating and productive, but where things often carry over day to day if anything goes wrong. And limiting those goals to 5 means that, even if I have a tonne of chores or little things to do, I can still succeed without needing to bury myself in a twenty-point to-do list - and anything else I do is gravy.

I think I need to be explicit with myself, too, that the goal can just be "eat at least once" and "take my meds". That way, I can still succeed on the days when I wake up and just surviving the day feels like an accomplishment.

I'm very conscious that, for me, the goal actually isn't "be more productive" - even when I hate myself for being lazy and apathetic, I am usually very productive. Like, today feels like a failure of a day where I slept all day and did nothing, but I made bread, I made dinner, I called my mum, I took a bath, I wrote stuff... it's not good for me, but that's a perfectly respectable amount of work for a day off, you know?

so the goal for me is more to convince myself of that, and to feel like my life is a little less Sisyphean and a little more... well. Successful. and there might be days where I wake up full of energy (that's happened! like... maybe a dozen times in my adult life, but it's happened!) and ready to take on the world, and I can set myself Big Jobs as a success criterion, and there might be days when I wake up feeling like garbage and can't imagine myself doing more than the bare minimum. but I think setting goals on a daily basis like that will be good for accounting for that (whereas previously my goal-setting has been a weekly thing, and it's a bit more prone to optimism and drift).

anyway this is a lot of blather for "I want to try a very basic motivation technique that's been in common usage for decades" but. i wanna. and i wanna remember this tomorrow so i can give it a real shot.

[neuroborreliosis]

in a fortuitous turn of events, i was able to begin - really actually begin - treatment yesterday.

i had grown tired of waiting for the call i was told i would receive when my blood work results arrived at the stram center. it's not that i don't trust my stram providers; rather, i don't trust albany med. they screwed up my blood work the first time, only drawing three of the nine vials they were ordered to draw. if not for the mix-up with my legal name (on my medicaid card, on my id) not matching up with the name listed on my blood work order, they probably wouldn't have even noticed they made a mistake. but they did, because i had to go back to the hospital a day after initially going to get the blood work done, have my doctor send over a new order with my legal name on it, and get the vials redrawn so they could be sent out for analysis. when the phlebotomist came in, she informed me that the day prior, whoever drew my blood (a younger phlebotomist who had struck me as frazzled, distracted) only drew a third of the amount he should have.

anyway, the stram center kept trying to reach out to them regarding my results - normally it can take up to two weeks, but it had been a month, and they still hadn't received anything. so yesterday, dillon accompanied me to the hospital where i asked the receptionist at the blood lab what happened to my results. she gave me a number to call along with two extensions, and told me the person on the line could search up my results for me. i called the number, that very same receptionist answered, which i thought was awkward and sorta funny, and she transferred me to whoever it was that was supposed to help me.

the woman on the other end of the line asked for my name, date of birth, and when it was that i came in for blood work. she looked me up under both my legal name and my actual name, and she came up with nothing. she told me she was going to do further digging and call me back. i told dillon i was fed up and pissed, how could a hospital just disappear nine vials of blood, especially today, when everything is computerized, accounted for, supposedly?

i told dillon fuck it, let's drive to the stram center, i'll get a new blood work order printed, make sure it has my legal name and sex on it (that was another issue, stram had my sex as M when it was never legally M...ugh) and go to labcorp to get new vials drawn. when i arrived, the lovely amazing helpful sweet receptionist named natalia looked me up in their system and saw that my bloodwork had in fact arrived a few days prior - i hadn't gotten a call from katie because she hadn't gone over the results yet. in a stroke of luck, katie had time before her next appointment, because the patient was late. so she took me into her office, went over the labs with me, sort of rushed but equally as thorough as always. b12 and vitamin D deficiencies. slightly better than the results from 8/2022, but mostly the same. i'm good to start antibiotics, she said! she prescribed me liquid D3 (a supplement called k2d3) and a liquid supplement called "methyl factors" that contained b12, b6, folate, and one other thing. and she sent in my rx for antibiotics - bactrim 160 mg and cefdinir 300mg. i was told to take two each per day, early and evening, and take the three different probiotics two hours between doses of antibiotics. i was told to start one antibiotic first, then add the second after 2-3 days. i took the first dose of bactrim last night, the second this morning. i am also taking l-glutathione at night, along with melatonin and my regimen of things that help me shit. i am still taking suboxone once a day, in the morning. i started taking the k2d3 (any time a day, once a day) and the methyl factors once a day, in the morning.

i'll update again soon, with more deets on how i'm feeling, how my body is responding to the treatment. for now, i'm tired, but i feel like the sicky is a herxy sicky, so that makes me hopeful.

[hitaka5ever]

Gallbladder Removal Surgery

I wanted to wait to type this after I got my appointment scheduled, but I'll just add it later

Anyway, since Tuesday, I have had severe pain in my back, chest, and abdomen. At first I thought it was just back pain that was severe enough that I could feel it through my chest and belly. On Monday I had been doing some heavy duty digging and pulling out strips of metal from our old pool that we took down, so I thought Tuesday's pain was just a result of overdoing it the day before

Then on Wednesday, I was still having pain in all 3 places and taking Tylenol/Ibuprofen for the pain. It wasn't until after eating quite a bit of gelato ice cream that the worst pain appeared while I was using the bathroom. I had just started my period so I figured it was just more severe cramps than normal and that it would pass once my pain meds kicked in (I believe I was just taking Ibuprofen at the time but my recollection is a bit fuzzy)

This had not been the case

So since Wednesday night, I was having severe pain in my chest and abdomen on my right side below my breast bone. It hurt the worst if I hiccupped, yawned, or did any kind of deep inhales of breath. I was gonna call my doctor on Thursday, but I had fallen asleep during the time I would need to call (they close at 5) So I had to wait until Friday morning to call them

I left a message bc the medical assistant wasn't available, but I also found that I could email my doctor directly through their office's medical portal website, so I had only 1000 characters to explain what was going on

She replied back an hour later, telling me that the pain I was having likely was my gallbladder since I've had issues with it in the last 5 years, and that there wasn't time for me to come in to use their facilities, so she said I needed to go to the hospital. So mum and I went to our only hospital in the ER department, where we waited about 5 hours to finally be seen

So I go back into a hospital room, get an IV in so I could get some pain meds in me, and then I got a CT scan (I can get copies of those results when I return to the hospital) 20-30 minutes after the CT scan, they did an ultrasound on my chest and where my gallbladder sits. That's where they found the real reason I was having this pain all week

Basically my gallbladder is inflamed. They won't normally do surgery when its inflamed bc complications could arise, so I have to get the inflammation down with a set of pills they prescribed me to my preferred pharmacy, which should be filled today. Once that's gone, I can get prepped for gallbladder removal surgery

If all goes well, I should have my gallbladder out early in the coming week

So yeah, my pain may have started out from shoveling metal out of the ground as a pulled muscle in my back, but it turned into inflammation of my gallbladder a day later (I haven't had back pain in 2 days)

Everyone on my mum's side of the family has had their gallbladder's removed bc of gallstones. When I first found out I had problems, I had quite a few stones already, but the surgeon I was assigned to didn't think it was necessary to get rid of it, especially if I changed my diet. I did that for a time, didn't have any chest pains for 4 of the 5 years since my first diagnosis, but have had small incidents that didn't last very long

My last severe attack was when my sister came up for our grandmother's funeral. Then over time, I had really low level pains, which prompted my doctor to have me get the endoscopy I got a few weeks ago, to rule out anything else bc she was convinced my severe heartburn that I take prescription Omeprazole for was cause by my gallbladder. Once its gone, we'll see if my heartburn goes away

My gallbladder just finally can't take it anymore, and this surgery has been a long time coming, but it'll be here within the week

I'll update this after I get my appointment scheduled. Post-surgery, I'll be making a new journal to explain how things went and what I'm doing as I recover with rest. I won't have as difficult of a time as my sister bc unlike her, I can burp and fart the gas they pump into you out faster (she's unable to pass gas easily (she can't even make herself burp) so the gas they pumped her full of couldn't dissipate fast enough, which caused her to be in more severe pain than a person normally would)

Thank you all for reading and I appreciate everyone that has been concerned for me this week. You guys are awesome

[youbloodymadgenius]

Ivarello (Modern!Ivar x reader) Chapter 3

Moodboard by @quantumlocked310

Ivarello's masterpost here

A/N: This is my entry for @deans-ch-ch-cherrypie 500 Followers Fairy Tale Challenge. It's a retelling of Cinderella. Congrats again, darling 💖

A huge thank you to @mrsalwayswrite , who's a great beta reader and an even greater cheerleader 😂

A massive thank you to @quantumlocked310 , @vikingstrash and @serasvictoria . Thank you for agreeing to collaborate and for sharing your talent with me. Your moodboards are beyond amazing 🤩

In this story, Sigurd is alive. Ragnar and Aslaug are dead, but Lagertha didn't kill her. I took a lot of liberties with the show, I hope you won't mind.

Unlike the tale, there will be no magic involved. Not everything will be realistic, however. It's a fayritale, after all!

Let me know if you want to be tagged 😊

Summary: Orphaned five years ago, Ivar and his brothers have been living with Lagertha ever since. Now 16 years old, he wants to attend Harald's traditional Midsummer party, but obstacles stand in his way.

Warnings: description of car crash; orphaned kids; Sigurd being Sigurd; OOC characters.

Words: 3497 (oops 🙈)

Additional note: what you’re going to read is not realistic.

Enjoy 🙂

🛡⚔️🛡

With his stomach in knots and a frown on his face, Ivar watches closely his godfather, who enters the living-room, wheeling a large trolley case behind him.

"Hello, Ivar." Floki looks around, an eyebrow raised questioningly, "Lagertha isn't here?", before flopping down on the corner sofa.

"No," Ivar shakes his head, wheeling up next to him, "She's out on a date with this English guy... Hammond, Halmund or whatever his name is."

Scratching his ear, Floki tilts his head, "but she knows you're going, right?" He pulls the trolley case closer and then snorts, mumbling under his breath, "don't think I can't see you rolling your eyes!"

"What do you think? Of course, she knows. She said, and I quote," Ivar raises his hands to make air quotes, his voice tinged with obvious annoyance, "'Of course you can go, sweetie, you know I don't want to be the one holding you back. Call me if anything goes wrong. And don't forget to take your meds.'"

"She cares, Ivar." Floki's tone is soft as he places a hand on his godson's shoulder.

Ivar lowers his gaze. "You should have taken me in." His words are barely audible and suddenly he feels like he's eleven again and he has to swallow against the sudden dryness in his throat.

"You do know that back then I wasn't in a good place." Floki's sad sigh almost gets Ivar in tears as memories of his parents and Helga flood his mind. The pain in his heart becomes nearly unbearable but he fights it off with all his might. He never wants to feel broken and lost again.

Ivar lifts his head up and Floki can see the stubbornness in his eyes. "I could live with you now."

"No, you could not, and you know it!" Floki smiles and taps Ivar on the cheek. "Ivar, I live between two flights, today in Norway, yesterday in Iceland and after-tomorrow in Canada. What kind of life would this be for you, huh? And besides, living with Lagertha is not that bad."

But living with Sigurd is! Ivar wants to shout. He keeps quiet, though, shrugging before eventually mumbling. "Guess not..."

"So," Floki starts, eager to change the subject, "where are your brothers, by the way?"

"Where do you think they are, huh, you knock-kneed fool? They're already there." Ivar glances at his watch, furrowing his brow. "Harald's party started twenty minutes ago."

"We better hurry up, then!" Crouching down, Floki slowly opens the suitcase under Ivar's scrutinizing gaze.

"Quick!" Ivar commands, barely able to contain his impatience, his nervous fingers tapping his push rims. "What do you have for me, old man, huh?" He even contemplates climbing out of his chair to open it himself, but the fear of breaking a bone at the worst possible time is stronger than his eagerness.

"You're going to calm down, young Padawan." Floki quips, slowly moving his hand in front of Ivar with eyes full of mischief. Ivar immediately slaps his godfather's hand away, mumbling under his breath, "I'd rather be a Sith Lord." That earns him a loud, hysterical laugh from his godfather.

Ivar grunts, ready to protest, but all thoughts leave his mind as soon as he's able to see what is in the trolley case. The scowl on his face obvious, he doesn't even try to hide his disappointment as he utters, "you made me braces?"

He hates braces with a passion. Along with underarm crutches, he had some, as a child. They were bulky, stiff, painful and walking with them was tedious, agonizingly slow, and exhausting. Ragnar had been adamant that he wanted his youngest to walk, no matter the struggles, no matter the nearly unbearable pain. Ivar had settled his ass in a wheelchair the day of his father's funeral, getting rid of his braces shortly after, a decision he had never regretted. So no, such torture devices were not at all what he was hoping for.

"Have a little faith in me," Floki rolls his eyes. "These," he looks lovingly at the strange contraptions in his hands, "are not braces, Ivar. Have you and your crippled ass ever heard of exoskeleton?"

Ivar's eyes widen. "It's that thing used in rehab that allows paraplegics to walk, right?" As Floki nods, Ivar gives him a puzzled glance. "But, erm, you do know I don't have a spinal cord injury, don't you? Or are you suffering from memory loss? Maybe it's your age?"

Dismissing the remark with an exasperated wave of his hand, Floki hisses, "I'm well aware that you don't, godson dearest," before narrowing his eyes, his voice now serious, "you may have full sensation in both legs, yet they can't exactly support your weight and your lack of motor function can't be denied. Not really different from some paraplegic dudes, what do you think?"

Feeling a heavy lump in his throat, Ivar frowns, not pleased with the idea of him being like a paraplegic. Almost without thinking, he contracts his quads as best he can, as if he wants to make sure he's still able to do it.

Floki doesn't miss the barely-there movements in his thighs, though, and his voice softens. "Look Ivar, you're not a paraplegic, okay? But I used the exoskeleton technology. And since you're not paralyzed, I was able to make a smaller device that you can wear underneath your clothes, and you're going to walk. I mean, really walk, not just like those guys in rehab, between parallels bars and with a PT right behind them."

Ivar, his eyes bright, stares at his godfather, slack-jawed with amazement. "I'm..." He begins to sputter, voice filled with emotion, "I'm really going to walk?" Feeling like his heart is pounding out of his chest, he fails to contain his excitement, drumming the fingers of his right hand on his lap. He'd tap his feet if only he could.

"You are." Floki nods before taking out of the trolley case a pair of dress shoes. "I put dozens of sensors in the insole of these shoes, which will enable the exoskeleton to correct your stance practically every second. Therefore, you won't need crutches, although I would say it's safer for you to use this." Reaching down, he grabs a black derby-style cane, simple and sleek in design. "You know," he shrugs, "just for extra support. Better safe than sorry, hmh?"

Ivar, who doesn't even flinch when he sees the walking stick, just reaches out, his hand grazing the carbon fiber exoskeleton. "Is it really for me?" His eyes filled with wonder, his voice trembling, his lips stretch across his face as his godfather nods. "And you made this in what?... four, five days?"

Letting out his signature giggle, Floki waggles his fingers in front of his face. "Even I couldn't make this in such a short time. No, the truth is, I've been working on it for a while. Let's say your phone call just sped things up. Though I must say, this marvel of technology is not flawless... It has a really low battery life, like four hours of autonomy at best. If I had more time, I certainly could have done better, but for now, it is what it is and you'll have to make do with what you've got." Pursing his lips, he glances at his watch, "So, just so you know, if you put this on now, you'll have to come back around midnight if you don't want to have to crawl around. And if you hear a beep, you'd better hurry, okay?"

As Ivar just nods, his beaming smile never fading, Floki adds, tilting his head, "and now, go get ready, young Padawan, you have a party to attend!"

***

Sitting on a bench at the seaside, Ivar watches the party from afar, a feeling of uneasiness tightening his chest. It was a mistake. Attending to this party was a mistake. Despite the exoskeleton, despite the fact that he walks almost normally, it was a mistake. He shouldn't have come. He shouldn't be here. Anxiety surges like the swell of a wave, and he struggles to breathe. Sigurd was right: he doesn't belong here, doesn't belong to this life.

A part of him wants to leave. It would be better to run away, to go hide in his room. But he won't. He can't. Because just a moment ago he saw you. Because he's not ready to give up on you now that he is here, eventually close to you.

He recognized you the moment his eyes fell on you. Looking radiant in a polka dot dress, you're as pretty as he remembers. Pretty? Who's he kidding? The girl you were six years ago was pretty. You're a woman now, and one of the most beautiful he's ever seen.

Glowing, smiling at everyone, you didn't even see him. In his head, of course, he makes plans to approach you, even if deep down, he knows all too well he'll never muster enough courage to talk to you. You probably wouldn't want him to anyway. After all, he may be standing tall today, yet he's still a freak, a fucking cripple. He's still cursed with his bony, twisted, useless legs. He's still a burden.

Yet, there's this little voice inside of him, barely audible, whispering that you're not like this, that you never were in the first place; and that's partly why the ten-year-old boy he was when he first met you felt drawn to you almost instantly.

Closing his eyes, he focuses on his breathing and decides to take a little trip down memory lane, bringing him back to that sunny, summer day of his first – and only – encounter with you. His memory so vivid it's like it happened only yesterday.

He can't hear the chirping of birds as his brothers are loudly playing and bickering in the pool. His beloved mother is nowhere to be seen and he's willing to bet she's taking a nap, but not without first making sure he has everything he could possibly need. Lying on a sunbed in the shade of an oak, a glass of lemonade within reach and a thick book on his lap, he hardly notices his father coming into the backyard, Harald Hårfager following close behind.

Since Ivar knows Harald is here to talk business with his father, he pays no attention to the two men, who take their seats at the patio dining table.

He nearly falls off the sunbed when a tiny voice startles him. "Hello!"

Stunned, he turns his head towards the voice and comes face to face with a smiling girl he doesn't know. You. He'd say you're about his age.

"I'm Y/N," you tell him, waving your hand shyly. "I'm at my uncle's for the weekend," you keep going, pointing your finger at Harald, "and I was wondering... May I join you?" You finally ask, dragging a second sunbed closer to his.

His first instinct is to look around, because you can't possibly be talking to him. Why would you? Surely you can't have failed to spot his leg braces, nor his hideous orthopedic shoes. You can't have missed that he's a cripple.

Frowning as he sees that no one is around, he snorts, his nostrils flaring. He can tell you're wearing a swimsuit under your pink dress. What do you want, then? Are you here to mock and ridicule him or what?

"You better get in the pool with my brothers." He knows he sounds rude, not answering nor greeting you, but he doesn't care. He doesn't want to be made fun of and doesn't intend to give you the chance to do it.

Seemingly undeterred, you speak with a soft voice. "No, I'd rather not." Your smile is so genuine he can't help but think you mean no harm. "Actually," you shrug, sitting next to him, "I'd rather stay here with you, if you don't mind. What are you reading?"

Gobsmacked, he just looks at you – and gods, how pretty you are! – for a long time, unable to utter a single word. Are you truly interested in what he's reading? Interested in him? He swallows hard, his heart racing. A small smile dancing on your lips, your kind eyes never leave his as you wait, full of hope, for him to finally talk to you.

And that's what he ends up doing, almost in spite of himself. For the next two hours, he shows you his astronomy book, a gift from his godfather for his tenth birthday, and tells you about the stars, the constellations and the nights he spends watching the sky, when his mother allows him to. And for two hours you listen to him, asking a question here or there and always smiling. He's pretty sure you're not faking being interested in what he's saying.

All too soon, your uncle tells you it's time to go and you stand up with a scowl, letting out a sigh of regret. The next moment, you flash Ivar a grin. "I had a really great time with you, thanks! I'm going back to my mom's tomorrow but I hope we can spend time together again sometime, maybe next summer. I'd love to stargaze with you, you know?" With that, you lean forward and as your lips touch his cheek, Ivar's breath catches in his throat, his heart pounding like a drum in his chest.

Ivar inhales deeply. That kiss... That's when he fell madly and hopelessly in love with you. If he concentrates enough, he can still feel the softness of your lips against his skin, still smell your sweet, flowery scent.

That day, he had watched you leave with a smile on your face, already dreaming of the day he would see you again. You had said "next summer" and even though it was a long time away, he was willing to wait. In the meantime, he would have plenty of memories to recall - your joyful voice, your sparkling eyes, your lovely smile... Sure, he could wait.

And he had waited, hopeful and happier than he had been in a long time.

Not long after, however, his life had been turned upside down, his father being murdered and his mother dying in a car crash. Lost, angry, broken, and infinitely sad, he had gone through the following months as if anesthetized - barely living, hardly functioning, sometimes feeling as if the memory of you was the only thing keeping him from drowning.

Yet, and he doesn't know why – or perhaps simply because Ragnar being dead, Harald had no reason to visit anymore – he had never seen you again.

"Hello!"

His whole body freezes and he stops breathing. This voice... Your voice... He'd know it anywhere. Yet, it can't be, right? Did he fall asleep? Is he dreaming? Is one of his brothers tricking him? Why would you talk to the cripple?

"My name is Y/N." He can hear the smile in your voice. "I was wondering... May I join you?"

Summoning the courage he's not sure he has, Ivar looks tentatively toward you.

Gods! You're even more beautiful up close. Fuck. Now that you're here, right next to him, he doesn't know what to say, what to do. Panic seizes his hammering heart as a lump rises in his throat. He attempts to swallow around it to speak, to say something, anything, but the words won't come out and he finally just nods, his hand gesturing to the bench for you to sit on.

"Thanks," you give him a broad smile before taking your seat.

Ivar cannot believe his eyes. What are you doing? Did you recognize him? Why are you here, with him?

"Woul–", he sputters, struggling to find his voice, "Wouldn't you rather be there?" Pointing his index finger at the crowd gathered in front of the makeshift stage just a few meters away. He frowns, tilting his head, "the party is in full swing."

"No, I'd rather not." You shrug and as you turn your head toward him, he breathes in your sweet scent, suddenly feeling dizzy. "The guys are already drunk and really have one thing on their minds. And those who are not are boring." You lower your gaze, as if embarrassed, and it's so adorable Ivar feels like his heart is melting. "I'd rather stay here with you, if you don't mind."

Oh, he doesn't. He doesn't mind at all. The truth is, there's a fucking firework inside of him, and he barely contains the screams of happiness that threaten to escape his lips. "That's okay, you can stay," he says instead, his fidgeting fingers dancing on his lap.

Over the next hour or so, the conversation flows easily as you speak about Karasjok, the small town where you live, telling him about your mother's people, the Sami, their culture and customs.

Ivar shares with you bits and pieces of his life too, speaking about his passion for the Viking culture and about his belief in the ancient gods. The night, his night, is full of your laughs, full of your smiles, full of you. He wants it to never end.

He's still trying to figure out if you know who he is, if you remember meeting him once when you rise to your feet, almost bouncing with enthusiasm. "Walk with me, will you?"

He's about to break the truth about his inability to walk when he remembers that actually, thanks to Floki, he can. His eyes never leave yours as he grabs his cane with a little bit of self-consciousness, wincing as he stands up, but he can't see disgust, contempt, or disappointment on your face and your smile doesn't falter as you delicately slip your hand under his free arm, curling your fingers back over it. Shaken by your sudden proximity, Ivar feels goosebumps rising on his skin.

"It's such a lovely night and I'm so happy spending it with you."

Your words leave him speechless as you lead him close to the water. A bunch of guys can be seen in the distance and Ivar is pretty sure his brothers are among them. He can feel their heavy stares on him and doesn't need to hear them to know what they're saying. "Who's this dude? Do we know him?" Standing tall, with his braided hair and a blue suit, he knows he doesn't look like himself. Yet, as he locks eyes with Hvitserk for a second, he'd sworn he sees a hint of recognition crossing his brother's face. And as the latter gives him a thumbs up, he knows his mind is not playing tricks with him.

"Oh, I love this song!" You clap your hands twice before shrugging shyly. "Let's dance, please!"

Ivar's heart breaks. Scared out of his wits, he swallows hard, his breathing uneven. "I... I can't." It's a painful admission, and he wishes the ground would just swallow him up.

He realizes you pay no mind to his defeated tone, though, as you grab his cane, leaning it against a nearby tree. "We'll go slow, I promise."

Almost in spite of himself, he places his hands on your hips as you wrap your arms around his neck. Gently – cautiously – swaying to the music, Ivar leans in close and, inhaling deeply your delightful scent, he feels like he's going to spontaneously combust. Your head resting on his chest, he's sure you can hear his frantic, pounding heartbeat. But he can't bring himself to care, not when you're finally exactly where he wants you to be. In his arms.

That's why he doesn't hear the first beep, or if he does, he doesn't pay any attention, entranced by your beauty, your kindness and the mesmerizing color of your eyes.

But when you stop dancing, your eyebrows raised, "What's that beeping noise? It doesn't stop," he hears it too, cold sweats washing over him as panic courses through his body.

"I... I must... I must go," he stammers, and honestly he's about to throw up. He can't think, can't speak. All he knows is that he doesn't want you seeing him crawling around. He won't allow it. He can't.

Fuck.

That's why he leaves. He just strolls off. He doesn't see the appalled look you're giving him, doesn’t' realize he's leaving his black cane behind, doesn't hear the despair in your tone as you shout, "wait, please! I don't even know your name!"

He has only taken a few steps when crocodile tears run down his cheeks, blurring his sight. It hurts so much he could scream, and he can barely breathe as the realization starts to sink in. Who was he trying to fool? Sigurd had been right all along. No matter the exoskeleton, no matter the genius of his godfather, he's still a freak. A monster. An abnormality.

He doesn't belong. He's not worthy.

Fuck.

His heart shatters in a thousand pieces.

Fuck.

Y/N.

Fuck.

🛡⚔️🛡

Ivar's taglist: @waiting4inspiration @honestsycrets @lisinfleur @saldelys @gearhead66 @inforapound @readsalot73 @milkkygirls @xbellaxcarolinax @shannygoatgruff @zuxiezendler @hecohansen31 @lonewolf471 @fuckindiva @tgrrose @didiintheblog @peachyboneless @pieces-by-me @funmadnessandbadassvikings @ethereallysimple @destynelseclipsa @cocovikings23 @xceafh @mrsalwayswrite @deans-ch-ch-cherrypie @pomegranates-and-blood @jadelynlace @grimeundglow @quantumlocked310 @alexhandersen-marcoilsoe-fandom @adrille88

Ivarello's taglist: @not-another-viking-fanfic-blog @hashimily @prepare4trouble @supernaturalvikingwhore @funmadnessandbadassvikings @heavenly1927 @dini73

[procrastinatingsapphictrash]

Migraines

Word count: 1679

Genre: Hurt/comfort 

Pairings: Natasha x fem!reader, platonic avengers x fem!reader

Warnings: Some swearing (let me know if I need to add more)

Request: hi~ was wondering if you’d do a natasha x reader with a dash of platonic avengers when reader has chronic migraines but hasn’t told nat so ends up in random places to try and sleep them away and the others keep finding her and then nat figures out she’s hiding something and feels hurt but ends fluffy wanting to take care of reader next time? you can choose who and change any part you want!

Summary: Reader gets really bad migraines and is constantly being found by the team when she wants to be alone, however her girlfriend Natasha doesn’t know what’s going on. 

A/n: This request was for @casperlikej​ so I hope you like it! Also I would like to mention that I know next to nothing about migraines so this probably won’t be super accurate but hopefully it’s ok to read anyways. I’m queuing this to come out on Sunday so that over the weekend I can work on the friends to enemies to lovers three part series and get that out soon (no I have not forgotten about that request). I am only like a sixth into that series but so far I’m super proud of it so I can’t wait to get it done! Also if anyone has ideas, feel free to request anything because I like having multiple fic ideas to think of at all times. Anyways I’m rambling now but I hope you enjoy this fic!

You hated being away from Natasha because although you had only been together for a few months and only known her for half a year you were sure you loved her but sometimes you just couldn’t stand pretending to be okay in front of her so you would hide yourself away. Currently your favourite place to hide was a nice rocking chair near the medbay area that was tucked away in the corner of a room. Barely anyone ever went by and the few that did never seemed to notice, giving you the anonymously you needed in order to curl up with your head in your knees and try to calm your head down. 

“Y/n? What are you doing here?” You hear Tony’s voice ask and you startle. 

“Oh, um, I’m just spending time with myself.” You respond lamely as Tony raises an eyebrow. 

“You never spend time by yourself,” he points out, “whenever you want to get away from us you always spend time with Natasha.” 

“I am alone sometimes.” You say starting to get annoyed. 

He scoffs. “No you aren’t, is everything ok between you two?”

“Everything is fine, just leave!” You snap at him. He hesitates in leaving the room but ultimately goes without saying another word after seeing how intensely you started glaring at him. It takes longer than usual for your migraine to go away because usually staying level headed helped but at least you yelling got Tony out of the room and to stop asking questions.

---

It was only a few days later that you got another migraine. You excuse yourself from the room you were sitting in with Bruce, Tony and Nat, mumbling some bullshit about needing to go to the store and ignoring Tony’s worried look on your way out. You knew that Tony would come looking for you in your old place so you decide to hole up in the room near the pad Thor uses whenever he visits earth. Today wasn’t a very bad migraine because you were able to catch the signs early but it still takes slightly over an hour for your head to stop pounding. You’re about to leave the room and go back to find the others but just to your luck Thor happens to arrive today unscheduled, something that only happens every few weeks. 

“Lady Y/l/n!” his voice booms happily as he steps inside, “it’s so good to see you, but what are you doing here, I wasn’t aware I had informed anyone of my arrival.”

You laugh slightly at his formal way of speaking and confused expression. “You didn’t, I just happened to be here because I was trying to be alone for awhile.”

“Are you feeling unwell?” He asks, looking concerned. 

“Not at all,” you reassure him, “in fact I was just about to go back to the others when you arrived, shall we find them together?” He nods eagerly, holding out his arm for you to hook onto like a true gentleman.

---

The next time you try to hide away you’re talking to Steve and he isn’t getting your subtle cues that you want to leave so he just keeps talking. You think he is talking about some sort of mission but honestly you don’t know because it physically hurts your brain to pay attention. You want to yell at him so badly but you can’t bring yourself to because he isn't trying to hurt you at all and he’s too nice to be angry at. 

“You agree Y/n?” You manage to make out. 

“Yes.” You say, not knowing what you’re even agreeing to.

“Great, I’ll go talk to the others, see you tomorrow for the morning training!” He says before walking off. You groan out loud as soon as you can no longer see him, partly because of how much your head hurts and partly because you accidentally told Steve that morning training was a good idea. This time you just plop yourself on the nearest couch and hope nobody finds you. 

---

You stumble into Bruce’s lab calling out for him. It had been over a week since your last migraine and encounter with Steve, one of the longest breaks you’ve had within recent memory but that came back to bite you in the ass when today’s was worse than ever before, even blurring your vision a little because of the pain. 

Bruce stands up from behind a pile of boxes. “Y/n, what brings you here.” 

“Pain meds now.” You order in a weak voice. He looks curious but doesn’t question you, heading towards a back cabinet and pulling out a bottle of pills. You immediately take two and swallow, ignoring him scolding you that you should only take one. Luckily since Bruce invented them himself it only took about five minutes for them to kick in. 

“Sorry, I had a really bad headache.” You tell him which is a half truth. 

He looks at you in concern. “Are you sure that was only a headache? It looked bad.” 

You wave him off, heading towards the door because you didn’t want him to ask anymore questions. “I’m fine Brucie, thanks again!” He sighs and shakes his head as he watches you leave, worried but deciding it’s not his place to badger you about it. 

---

Since every time you got a migraine you always ended up around one of the others you made a plan so that you could avoid everyone because you knew that one day your luck was going to end and Natasha would be the one to find you. You knew that she wouldn’t be mad at you or anything since you can’t control them but the relationship is still new and you don’t want to badger her with any of your problems. 

That’s why as soon as you start to feel a migraine coming on you hoist yourself up into the vents above your (sort of) shared room with Natasha where you had left a blanket and some pillows to relax with… only to find Clint waiting for you there. 

“I was wondering who had left these up there.” He says, seeming like it was a perfectly natural thing for him to be in the vents above your room. You decide not to question it, only sighing because you know that conversation would take up too many thoughts that you don’t have space for right now. You’re just so fucking done with your migraines and want them to go away. 

Clint notices your sadden expression and is serious for once. “Y/n, what’s going on?”

“I get these stupid fucking migraines and it only seems to be getting worse and I don’t want anyone to think I’m weak and I want Natasha but I don’t want to bother her with my problems.” You unload, holding back tears.

“I’m not going to lie to you, I don’t know how to make you feel better,” he confesses, “however why don’t you try to take a nap in your own bed and if you really don’t want Tasha to find you I can keep her distracted.” You nod and he helps you back out of the vents, climbing down after you. 

“Clint?” you say as he’s leaving the room and he turns around, “thanks.”

---

Clint makes his way to the common room where he sees Steve talking to Natasha. 

“Hey guys, what’s up?” He asks with a smile, faltering when he sees Natasha looks upset. “Nat, what’s wrong?”

“I think Y/n is going to break up with me.” She says, her voice thick with emotion. 

Steve frowns. “I told you not to jump to conclusions, maybe you should just talk to her.” Natasha just shakes her head, looking down and taking a deep breath, trying to regulate her emotions. 

“Y/n’s going to hate me for this,” Clint says as two pairs of eyes turn to him, “but you should go to your room, I promise that she’s not planning on breaking up with you.” 

Natasha noticeably brightens. “Are you sure?”

Clint nods. “I’m sure, she said not even five minutes ago that she wanted you. She’s going through some shit right now that you should talk to her about but she wouldn’t break up with you.” 

“Thanks.” Natasha replies, before hurrying to your shared room, worried about you after what Clint said. 

---

You curl up on the bed and let a few tears fall out and before long you are full on sobbing. You always try to stay strong and not cry but you just can’t deal with the migraines anymore. The bed shifts behind you and you sit up straight looking behind you. Natasha is climbing on to it and looking at you with a worried expression on her face. 

“I thought Clint was going to keep you busy.” You say, sniffling to try to stop your tears.

“He must have lied because he told me to come here.” She responds. 

“He’s an asshole.” 

She gives a small laugh. “Normally yes, but he did the right thing, I want to help you with whatever is upsetting you.” 

“You shouldn’t have to deal with me like this,” you tell her, “my migraines are my problem that I have to deal with.” 

She moves across the bed and puts her arms around you. “No sweetheart, I’m here with you.” You start to cry again, this time while it’s slightly from the pain it’s mostly because you feel so overwhelmed with how much she supports you. She pulls you in tightly to her chest, and plants a kiss on the top of your head. 

“I will always be here for you if you need something ok?” she says. “But now you need to rest.” 

“But-” you start to protest before she cuts you off. 

“No buts, you need sleep.” She says while shushing you. You wiggle back, trying to be as far into arms as possible before you slowly drift off, the pain of the migraine going away and all you can feel is warmth.

---

Taglist: @fayhar @stephanieromanoff @stop-drop-and-drumroll @acertainredhead​ (if you want to be added, comment, send an ask, or message me)

[kast43]

[May contain angst, contains mild violence, a total fake scenario because DIOVOLO WOULD NEVER ALLOW this to happen]

For a few weeks now, some witches were giving MC a hard time. MC didn't quite understand why, but if they had to guess it was because of their living arrangement. MC never paid it any mind until one night when they were walking to the House of Lamentation after some errands alone. MC was jumped by 3 of them and roughed up a bit. One witch was so annoyed with MC's demeanor that they went too far and broke MC's arm. MC, not wanting any more trouble would decide to go to Purgatory Hall and ask for help.

💋Lucifer💋

-He got a phone call from Simeon, stating that they had to take MC for medical care for a broken arm.

-Didnt even give an explanation where he was going, but he rushed out of the house to be with MC.

-Was a composed mess; he was worried, angry and protective of MC.

-when questioned about how it happened, MC lied and he knew it.

-"Oh I just tripped and fell on my arm is all." Was not the explanation he believed.

-why would MC lie about this? He had to know.

-he would ask maybe a few more times then left MC alone. He knew he could find out more on his own anyways.

-as far as aiding MC, a perfect gentleman.

-Opens doors, holds bags, even does MC's chores if they were struggling.

-He felt so guilty for this that he would not leave MC's side for a minute...but it would be more comforting than overstepping.

-would be the one to make sure MC did everything they had to heal.

-"Don't forget to take your medicine. Do you need some water? Let me get it."

-"You are not suppose to prop anything on that arm...let me hold it."

-Would stop the brothers dead in their tracks if they tried to do anything that would require MC to do anything physical.

-He would be the type to not actually sign MC's cast, but he would wait until they were alone and draw a little heart in a place only MC could see

-He also low key had been suspicious about what happened and follows MC around to "observe".

-When he does find out what happens....well let's just say those who wronged MC will regret it deeply.

💰Mammon💰

-He might have been out gambling or something when he got the call about MC.

-run boy run

-His first reaction would be frustration of course

-"How could you let this happen??? Humans are too fragile and you need to be more careful!"

-would have never crossed his mind that MC lied about it.

-MC falls a lot, story checks out in his mind.

-Feral Protection Goblin.

-He refused to leave MC's side even for a second.

-He would carry bags and open doors, but Mammon being himself would do it in a very feral goblin way

-VERY protective. Like, No one was allowed to even look at MC without himself shooting a glare back.

-more worried about MC than what was going on around him.

-Absolutly the one to forget about meds

-signs his name IN BIG LETTERS on MC's cast

-May God have mercy on those witches that did this to MC when Mammon finds out what really happened.

🎮Leviathan🎮

-Most likely ignored Simeon's call, but would read his text.

-He does not like to leave his room often, but he will go to pick MC up with little hesitation.

-he will asked what happened, but ultimately he does not care since he can't stop it now.

-poor thing would be too scared to touch MC TBH.

-this reminds him how delicate humans were and he didn't want to make things worse.

-he would be more clingy without making contact.

-for the most part he did anything MC asked, only if they asked tho.

-was actually stoked that MC could actually spend time playing games or watching anime with him since they could not do too much physical labor.

-he would enjoy having quality time like this, but be upset it had to be this way.

-"It's annoying that you can only play games with me when you break a bone. You can come anytime you want you know."

-He would be the first one to sign the cast. Who knows, he might just doodle all over it

-lets say he overheard someone bragging about what they did to MC [since he is the quiet one no demon suspects him to be listening]

-he finds out what really happened...big mad

-seconds from summoning Lotan in the school

-then he finds out *who* did it

-pays each witch involved a visit and summons Lotan in each home

📚Satan📚

•he was simply reading when he got the call

•there he go, faster than light

•he would greet MC with in interrogation

•"MC what happened?"

•"Did someone do this to you?"

•"Where/when did this happen?"

•"You are FAR from 'okay'!"

•MC would just dodge any question regarding what had happened...MC knew that Satan was too smart to fall for one of their lies

•Satan does not know much about broken human bones...but by the next morning he  became an expert.

•He would go about this a lot like Lucifer, but in a more emotional way.

•Satan had become more protective of MC and refused to let them do anything too physical.

•he would follow MC around, making sure they did all the right things, carry bags, open doors, ya know the whole deal.

•took extra time with MC during study time and bed time.

•"I brought your meds...here is some water as well."

•med police

•would draw a cat on their cast

•He loves to read to MC as they fall asleep.

•if he were to find out what actually happened [which he would a lot faster than Lucifer btw] oh no

•oh no

•oh no no no no no

•might as well write those witches obituaries cuz THEY GONE

💋Asmodeus💋

•Picks the phone with Simeon and starts to flirt first off

•as mush as Simeon would love to entertain this, he let's Asmo know that MC had to be taken to get medical care

•Asmodeus rushes to go collect MC.

•he would understand MC was hurt, and at first he would play it off as shit just happens

•especially when MC lied about how it happened

•Honestly he would be low key scared and high key protective

•The one he loved the most [other than himself] was hurt!

•Obsessed with taking good care of MC.

•other than Lucifer, would be the best at making sure MC was taking good care of themselves to heal 🌟Beautifully🌟

•"MC~♡ let's take a break. Come and sit for a while"

•"use this lotion where you can reach, your skin will get dry under the cast"

•"don't forget your meds love, the sooner you heal the sooner we can be naughty~ 😈"

•this brother would be the most clingy out of all of them, but works out for MC.

•goes above and beyond holding doors and carrying bags...would escourt MC everywhere

•He does not only signs the cast, he glues a picture of himself on it

•MC would eventually tell Asmo what really happened...thinking they could trust Asmo not to loose his shit

•He looses his shit, but holds it together in front of MC

•the second he knows MC is asleep...he goes hunting for some naughty witches.

🍔Beelzebub🍔

•he was at practice when it happened, and missed the call

•MC ended in meeting him halfway home

•poor thing does not know what to do

•So sorry he missed the call

•the fact of the matter is, he trusts MC in what MC says happened.

•he was use to injuries with his workouts and sports...but MC was far too fragile...

•he would be the 'scary dog privilege' for MC

•He respects MC enough to give them space...but also watches MC like a hawk

•carries things for MC and refuses to take no for an anwser

•made sure MC was fed at ALL times.

•"Food always makes me feel better, so maybe you will get better if you eat"

•MC attaches themselves to Beelz instead of the other way around

•He would sign the cast, plain and simple. Mc would explain that he could add more if he wanted. [As evident from Mammon signing a new spot every day] so he would most likely draw food or something later on

•When Beelz finds out what truly happened, he would get upset...but not enough to do anything super harmful.

•he could go and eat all their food...or their homes. He would decide in the car.

🥱Belphagor🥱

•Again, Belphie is smarter than he lets on

•he would be aware of the bullies, but not the extent of what they would do

•most likely was asleep during the call

•would notice MC's long absence, then when MC did show up he was shocked.

•asking the usual questions, who what when where...MC would dodge them all.

•Belphie was suspicious

•Would be the most protective of MC, always be by MC's side

•but much like Beelz he would respect MC's space

•until he was sleepy that is

•would rest on MC anywhere and anytime

•would also be MC's 'scary dog' privilege, but shows dominance by laying in MC's lap

•MC didn't mind, they would play with Belphie's hair anyways

•he would doodle all over the cast, and if anything would sign his name under Mammon's every time he signed

•thrilled to bits at all the naps MC and him now have since MC was not allowed to do much.

•"Where do you want to nap today?"

•"MC why don't we go to the attic today, I happen to know Mammon is going get yelled at today...it won't be quiet for long"

•when he finally finds out what happened, and he will find out, he will not hold back

•where his twin would be passive, he would be aggressive...we can leave it at that

[thebookreader12345]

Heart Palpitations

Pairing: Connor Rhodes x reader

Summary: Y/N passes out and ends up in the hospital where she meets the handsome Dr. Rhodes, the man who’s going to save her life from what she believes are panic attacks

Requested: Yes, by anonymous

Warnings: mentions of panic attacks and heart conditions

Word Count: 1,373 Words

“Did you really have to bring me to the hospital? I’m fine,” I tell the paramedic.

“Per hospital policy, if we get to a victim who is unconscious, we have to bring them in. Besides, you passed out at work. That means something’s up,” the woman responded and pushed my gurney into one of the open trauma rooms, letting me move to the bed. “Now, change into this, and Dr. Rhodes should be with you soon,” she said and left the room, taking the gurney with her.

“Ugh,” I groan. “This is ridiculous.” I changed into the hospital gown quickly and sat down on the bed, pulling out my phone to check my email. As I was typing back a reply to a message my co-worker sent, a doctor entered the room. I thought Dr. Rhodes would have been a bald, old man, but he was quite the opposite. It took everything I had in me to stop my jaw from dropping.

“Hi, Ms. L/N. I’m Dr. Rhodes,” the man spoke.

“Please. Call me Y/N,” I correct.

“Okay. Y/N, I’m Connor,” Connor greeted.

“Nice to meet you, Connor. Can I just say that you’re the hottest doctor I’ve ever seen,” I point out.

Connor blushed a little bit, but ignored the comment and lifted up his tablet. “So you passed out at work today?”

“Yeah, but its no big deal. I get panic attacks, which sometimes cause me to pass out,” I explain.

“Panic attacks? Can you tell me more about that?” Connor asked.

“Uh, sure. I started getting them a few years ago, so I went to a doctor who confirmed it. I’ve been taking medication for them ever since, but every so often a panic attack will hit me,” I disclose. Connor nodded and tapped away at his tablet, giving me the opportunity to admire him. That’s when my eyes caught sight of his doctor’s coat, and I saw his specialty. “Cardiothoracic? You guys think there’s something wrong with my heart?” I question.

“Well, you could be having panic attacks, but passing out doesn’t fit the normal symptoms” Connor replied and slid his stethoscope off his neck. “Do you mind?”

“Not at all,” I answer.

Connor walked closer to me and slipped the stethoscope into my gown, pressing it to my chest. The metal from the stethoscope was cold, causing me to flinch a bit.

“Sorry,” Connor apologized. “I should’ve warned you about that.”

“Its cool,” I state as he listened to my heart. When I first got here, I was confident that everything was fine. However, Connor made a weird face, so I got worried. “Is something wrong?”

“Your heart is beating pretty slowly. Maybe you weren’t getting enough blood to your brain, so you passed out. I’m going to need to run some more tests,” Connor spoke.

..............................................

“Coronary artery disease? Isn’t that what older people get?” I question.

“Its mostly found in older people, but young adults do get it from time to time. Basically, your arteries get blocked easily by cholesterol, so less blood is getting to your brain, causing you to pass out every once in a while,” Connor explained.

“So what’s the plan? Do I need surgery?” I ask.

“That’s a last resort option. For now, we’re going to start you on some meds. I’m going to need you to come in every couple of weeks so I can check up on you and see if the meds need to be switched or adjusted,” Connor responded.

“Well, if I have to see a doctor over and over again, I’m glad its one with a face like yours,” I confess, causing Connor’s cheeks to turn red. This time, I even got a little smile.

“All right. I’m going to get you started on some anti-coagulants, and then you’ll be able to get back to work as a.................” Connor froze when he realized he didn’t know what my career was.

“Paralegal,” I state. “I work at a law firm down town.”

“Huh,” Connor said.

“What?” I ask.

“I just didn’t pick you as the law type,” Connor replied. “I would’ve thought firefighter or cop based on your personality.”

“You know, you’re not the first person to tell me that,” I inform him. “My dad’s a cop, and being an only child, he really wanted me to pursue his career.”

“So why didn’t you?” Connor questioned.

“I’d rather not run into a spray of bullets and risk dying,” I say. 

Connor laughed and tapped away at his tablet. “I see your point. Nurse Sexton will be in here in a bit to give you the meds I just ordered, and on your way out, you and I will schedule your first check in. That sound good?”

“Sounds great. Thanks, Connor,” I exclaim.

Connor smiled. “No problem.”

3 Weeks Later

“There’s my favorite patient!” Connor exclaimed as he entered the room I was sitting in. “How’ve you been?”

“Fine, I guess. Work has been super busy lately, so I’m more stressed than usual. Other than that though, I’ve been good. How about you?” I ask.

“Oh, you know. Fixing people’s hearts. Saving lives. The usual,” Connor joked. “So, has the passing out stopped?”

I shook my head. “It doesn’t happen as often as before, but I still pass out every once in a while. Thankfully, it hasn’t been at work, just at home,” I answer.

“All right” Connor said and took his stethoscope from his pocket. “May I?”

“Go on ahead,” I reply and shrug off my jacket to give him easier access to my chest. Connor slid the stethoscope under my shirt, and this time, the cold metal didn’t bother me as much. Connor placed his hand on my shoulder as he listened to my heart, sending tingles throughout my body. I then realized how close Connor and I were to each other, and I could feel my face heating up.

“I think I’m going to keep you on the anticoagulants, but I’m going to add statin, which should hopefully keep you from passing out,” Connor explained.

“U-uh okay,” I stutter out, still flustered from the closer encounter I had with him seconds earlier.

“You good? Connor asked me.

“I’m fine. Do I need to schedule another appointment with you?” I question.

“I’m afraid until I get you on the right course of meds, you’ll have to keep coming back,” Connor responded.

“I don’t mind,” I say and pull my jacket back on. “Besides, you’re much more pleasant to talk to than the people I work with so...”

Connor laughed. “I believe it. Anyways, let me just prescribe you those meds and schedule another appointment, and then you can go on your way.”

3 More Weeks Later

“Its settled. I’m a genius. Tell me I’m a genius,” Connor said once he learned that I hadn’t passed out since he changed my meds, meaning they were working.

“Okay. You, Connor Rhodes, are the smartest doctor in the city of Chicago, and possibly the whole state of Illinois,” I state and laugh.

“Thank you,” Connor declared and bowed.

“Well, I guess this means goodbye. Since my heart is fixed, there’s no reason for me to keep coming back. Thanks again, Connor,” I tell him and make my way towards the door.

“Y/N wait,” Connor called out and stopped me just before I could leave, pressing his lips to mine. I was shocked at first, because I didn’t expect Connor to kiss me, but I soon got into it, wrapping my arms around Connor’s neck to bring him closer to me. When we pulled apart, I was almost out of breath.

“What was that for?” I ask.

“Ever since we met, I’ve felt this connection with you, and its only grown stronger over the past few weeks. Would you consider going on a date with me sometime?” Connor questioned.

I smiled. “I would love to go on a date with you. You’ve already got my number, so just text me anytime and we’ll work something out. As for now, I’ve got a huge case at work, so I’ve got to go. I’ll talk to you later, Connor,” I say and lean forward, kissing him one more time before leaving the room.

_________________________

Tag List:

@prettypyschoinpink @securityfriendly-jay @scarletsoldierrr @lorenakaspersen @virtualreader @carnationworld @caitsymichelle13 @king-crockett​

[ventela1]

Hey folks!!

As you may know, I’ve been trying to get T for a while.

Well, I have some good news! Thanks to successfully coming out to my dad a while ago and the help of a service called Plume, I can get T realistically within the near future.

Plume’s membership covers lab testing for bloodwork and such, and they have a location near me. They offer medication for a relatively small expense. So it’s $99/month, + about $15-50 for each medication fill.

This is still cheaper than using my insurance, which won’t cover endocrinologist appointments (so it’s about 150 dollars per visit, plus other exams, plus meds).

Without Plume’s membership, even using GoodRX I’m probably still looking at a medication cost of about $400 for 90 days.

I’ve had Planned Parenthood recommended to me for potentially cheaper visits. I will be calling them on Monday to check, and to ask if they can help me with the medication costs. But so far Plume looks like the best option.

So, in short, my minimum cost for T right now looks like $99/month, plus the actual medication.

I’m also unemployed. I live with my mom, who is also unemployed. I’m very grateful to not have to worry about the expenses of having my own place, but paying for things like my phone bill are still taking a decent chunk out of my savings/stimulus checks.

After I was laid off in March of last year due to Covid, I took a break from employment. It was not only for my mental health but mostly because my mom is a high risk individual for coronavirus. Getting the virus could potentially be very, very harmful to her. I applied to various jobs and even got called in for a very promising interview, but no place wanted me except jobs that would increase my chances of bringing the virus home with me.

Now that the vaccine is out, I’ll be working on employment again soon. I sent in an application today. I will be working on my needle phobia therapy again so I can get vaccinated soon. (If you’re wondering about needles/T, I’ll be using the gel form for hormones.) My mom has gotten her first shot, too, and is scheduled for her next one in May.

If I get a job that will really help, but neither of us will be fully immunized for another couple of months. And I can’t guarantee any place will hire me. And I know no one wants me to say this, but it’s not great for me to work. I mostly enjoy it, but my schoolwork sometimes suffers for it and I legitimately still wake up in the middle of stress dreams about stuff that happened at my last retail job. If I could live off of selling commissions or combine selling commissions with a low stress job until I finish college, I would.

I really, really want these hormones. I’ve been talking to my therapist and psych for months about it, but I’ve wanted T for over a year now. With the price points I talked about earlier, I feel like this is finally something real. I’m so excited!

So this is the part where I ask for boosts. I’ve opened headshot sketch commissions to be “pay what you want”. I put some examples of fairly recent sketches I did. I’ll draw furries, OCs, humans, pretty much almost anything.

Even a few cents as a tip adds on to my existing savings and maybe I can start hormones before getting a job!

If you can’t afford to send anything, don’t worry! Send me a message anyway and I’ll happily give you a quick sketch. Posting that art will hopefully help me get more commissions from other people. So you’re still helping me out.

And as always, reblogs help too!

Thanks everyone.

[subbing-for-clones]

Stranded Part 2

Savage Opress x Reader

Word Count: 2.7k

WARNINGS: Mentions of death and decomposition, mental illness, fear terror and FLUFF

PREVIOUS         NEXT          MASTERLIST

       Savage's eyes fluttered open to the sun shining brightly through the trans-durasteel panes that decorated the walls seemingly without rhyme or reason. The little one was frying some kind of thin meat strips on the stove and sipping hot caf. Without turning her head, she called over to him.

"How ya feeling?"

"Not great but better."

She turned and strode over to him, still laying down.

"I couldn't do this yesterday but I can today."

"What do you mean..?"

    She placed her hands on his bare broad chest and closed her eyes. A warm tingling sensation wafted over him. It felt like sunshine, utter joy and flying all at once. When she pulled away her eyes were a little fuzzy.

"It takes a lot of energy but you can transfer your life force to something and heal it. I was kinda low yesterday," she turned matter-of-factly back to the stove.

    Savage had only ever had painful experiences when it came to using the force or having it used on him. He hadn't ever thought of it as anything other than a weapon. He wanted to ask about it but shy away from the topic. Instead, he stood and stretched. He didn't have an ounce of pain. This woman who found him once again amazed him.

While the two unlikely pair ate their breakfast, her eyes didn't leave him, slightly squinting.

"You haven't been like this very long?"

"No. I was altered by the witches of my home world."

"Huh. Did you ask for this?" truly curious she stopped eating.

"No." she cocked a brow at his response, waiting for an elaboration.

"My species is subservient to our women. We live separately and go through deadly trials to be chosen by one for breeding or whatever they want really." He continued eating as the information he provided was simply normal for him.

"Was this..." she waved her hand at his body. "For breeding?" his cheeks slightly tinged in a deeper gold.

"No. I was chosen to act as a weapon for one of the sisters. She abandoned me when I didn't live up to the expectation." the woman noted as his eyes darkened. Wanting to change his mood she lightened up.

"Well, I'm happy you're here Savage. You have much to learn in the ways of the force.. you're strong but your energy is incredibly dark but you... you do not feel that way....." she trailed off in thought and muttered, "certainly an enigma. Very interesting," she tapped her finger against her chin.

    Savage's heart fluttered. He had never received any kind of praise from a female before and he didn't really know how to process it. His flush only deepened when she once again undressed in his line of sight, slipping on a shorter, loose grey dress.

"When you've finished, dress and meet me outside,” she skipped out the door and shouted something unintelligible into the trees.

    Savage silently hoped she wasn't completely insane while he quickly washed the dishes for her. He pulled on his pants and his long black kilt. Remembering that she had cut off his shirt for a sling he huffed and left the tattered remnant. When he came out, he saw what could've been a scene in a holovid. She stood with under a ray of sunlight, skin shimmering in the glow with a bright smile gracing her face. Her hands were pressed to the forehead of a green Varactyl while a dozen small song birds of every color fluttered around her.

"I think I should call you 'princess,'" he stepped forward cautiously.

She giggled melodiously.

"Mira here won't hurt you I promise. You think I look like a princess?" she flushed and batted her eyelashes.

"More than anyone else I've ever seen."

She extended her hand out to Savage.

"Come here," she cooed. He slowly made his way to her and took her hand. It was soft and warm, she held it for just a moment, running her thumb over his knuckles.

"Do not be afraid. Mira is a friend," she placed his hand where hers was just a minute ago on the Varactyl's head.

"Close your eyes and reach out to her with the force. Gently."

    He stood there for a minute before he felt anything. All of a sudden it felt like wind was rushing around him. He could see trees flying past him and a breeze danced against his skin. He leapt from trees, gliding through the air.

    She watched with satisfaction as his and Mira's eyes were closed and their breathing synced slowly. She felt their signatures meld for a moment. Savage pulled his hand away and looked at her wide eyed but grinning. Mira chirped happily beside him.

"Good, you made the connection. Rather quickly I might add. Mira is a receptive one. Very friendly. She's been with me a couple years now."

"I...I felt what she feels when she hunts," he was smiling at the creature fondly.

"Yes, that seems to be a favorite time for her."

"That felt much different than any other time I've used the force.... was that the light side?"

"I'm sure the Jedi would say yes but I am no Jedi. I don't see the force as light or dark."

Savage looked confused. Everyone called the force light or dark. The woman continued,

"Take a knife for example. In the wrong hands... a knife can take an innocent life, used to rob someone or threaten them other ways. However, in the 'right' hands it can be used as a medical instrument, carve wood or simply chop produce. I think of the force in the same way. The intent is what matters to me. Did you want to hurt Mira when you reached out to her?"

"No..no I didn’t," he stammered.

"That’s why it felt different."

    Savage understood what you were saying and turned back to Mira. The animal nudged him gently with her head affectionately.

"Let's go for a ride. I wanna finish stripping the ships you landed on. I haven't been to those ones yet. If you have anything else there, now’s a good time to get it."

    The woman strapped large bags onto the sides of the Varactyl. She hopped up onto Mira's back and once again extended her hand out to Savage. He climbed up and took his seat behind her. When Mira lurched forward, he gripped the woman's waist tightly so he wouldn't fall off and she laughed.

"Hold on tight handsome it's not a long ride but it's a turbulent one."

"A-alright princess."

      The added weight did nothing to slow Mira down. She was light on her feet and graceful. Leaping high into the air and gliding back down into the canopy. Princess whooped and cried out in excitement whereas Savage just held her tighter. His chest swelled with the rush. He was terrified but also having fun. He was a little disappointed when it ended and the ships were in sight. He slid off first and held his hands out for the princess. She beamed down at him and let Savage lift her by her waist with her hands on his shoulders. Her breath hitched when he pulled her down to him to set her on the grass underfoot. Quickly turning away to hide the heat rushing to her face.

"Alright, anything you wanna take, toss it in the bags. I'm gonna look through some of the others.”

    They parted. Savage always traveled light so he didn't have much to take with him. Some extra med gear and clothes, that was it. He hesitated in the cockpit looking down at the talisman that Mother Talzin gave him. It lay in pieces. He exhaled a silent apology, acknowledging that he probably wouldn't find his brother anytime soon. He slipped the pieces gently into his pocket and made his way out. After securing his few belongs in the saddle bag on Mira, he turned around to look for the princess. He could sense her nearby but couldn't see where she was.

"SAVAGE!"

He ran back to the hazardous pile of crashed ships.

"WHERE ARE YOU?"

He sighed relieved when she popped out behind his transport smiling ear to ear. His heart still pounding.

"It’s not huge but there's a Kriffing cargo ship buried under your transport and a fighter. Help me lift them. Cargos are gold mines."

    She stood shoulder to shoulder with him; well, shoulder to rib. Both of their arms were raised. It was shaky at first but they managed to move Savage’s large transport off to the side with the force. The fighter was much easier to shift. She grabbed his wrist and cried out excitedly, pulling him along to the sealed door.

"Could you cut it open with your saber?"

He smiled as she watched him ignite his saber and cut through the thick durasteel.

"Yes! Cutitopencutitopencutitopen!" she chanted excitedly and squealed.

Once he kicked the obstacle out of their way she shrieked and dove practically head first inside. When he entered, he was hit with the heavy scent of death. Four Weequay bodies lay scattered and half rotted around the cargo bay. Savage covered his nose with a disgusted look on his face.

The woman however didn't seem bothered by it as she sifted through the containers.

"This was a pirate ship... I haven't seen many of those," her whole top half was inside a rather large container while she spoke.

"Usually lots of credits, jewelry, spice.... not really useful to us right now but if we ever make it out of here, we'll be rich." He made his way to the sleeping quarters and took the standard med gear and hygiene supplies that was fairly standard to each room.

    When he came out, he found her pleasantly surprised as she held up some lovely dresses in bright colors to her form.

"I think I can tailor these to fit..." more thinking out loud than actually talking to him. She walked deeper, into the cockpit and tried to fire up the engine to no avail. She didn't have hope, it looked like they nose-dived into the ground anyway. She sighed and checked the common area.

    Rations, some cook ware in better shape than hers was, liquor... other odds and ends that would be decently useful. Savage found her holding a Sabacc deck.

"Do you know how to play?" She asked coyly?

"Yeah... some of the other nightbrothers taught me when I was a pup. Do you?" She shook her head.

"Well, I'll show you. We can play together." Her face lit up and something warmed in his chest that he'd never felt before. He pointed his thumb back towards the cargo bay.

"I found something you might be interested in.." she followed him; arms full. He fiddled with a small electronic box and powered it up.

"It won't connect to the net out here but it looks like there are some downloaded holovids,” he turned back to face her. She had dropped everything she was carrying and stared at him in amazement.

"I...I've never seen a holo-player out here before," he smirked.

"Well princess if you can charge it, we can see what's on it."

    The two of them loaded up what they had onto Mira. Princess did a thorough once over of the other ships. Finding a blaster with a decent amount of charges was the second best find next to the holo-player. They found a few sewing kits, more rations and med kits, and some crop seeds which also excited her.

They had ended up spending much longer than she wanted to searching through the wreckage. The sun was starting to set and it was falling fast.

"We need to get going. It gets dangerous at night... things come out.." she shifted uncomfortably on her feet looking up into the trees. Mira let out a quiet warning chirp. Savage lifted her up and put her on the Varactyl's back, climbing up behind her. This time when he held her waist it was more protective.

"I think I can sense them... what are they?"

Mira took off but it was slower, more cautious than when they came here to begin with.

"I don't know.. I've never seen them clearly. I know they have two arms, and three long sharp claws. Their hide is tough and... very rough. No fur.."

    Savage held his saber in one hand, not yet igniting it. He could see in the dark but these creatures still hid. The sky was a deep, dusty blue as dusk swallowed the atmosphere. It felt different at night. Like the air was hungry.

"I will keep you safe," he said as his eyes darted around. Once they broke the tree line it was only a short distance to the cabin. They unhooked the bags from Mira and she dashed behind the house up the barren hills, as far away from the forest as she could get. Savage and princess walked into the house.

"I've never seen them leave the forest. They've never come out of the trees into the clearing so the house and the yard are safe as well as the hot springs and hills behind us. Savage nodded in understanding.

"Stay here," his voice rumbled, "I'll fetch wood for the fire."

    She nodded before he left with his weapon in hand. Princess started putting away their various findings and set some rations out on the table. They were going to have to go hunting again tomorrow. She felt his shift in the force. Fear had a particularly unique wavelength. She took the blaster and right before could get to the door he kicked it open with his arms filled with wood. He hurried inside, dropped the wood and latched the lock. His face was blanched.

"Are you alright?" she asked slowly reaching for him.

"They just stood there. Behind the trees. Watching."

"You have night vision?"

He nodded and looked down at her.

"I... I’ve never seen anything like them. So.. gangly. Tall and.." he shuddered and shook his head, controlling himself. If she lived here for so long it was safe but when he turned back to face her, she had regressed.

"Beasts in the trees....." she still stood but her eyes were blown, her arms crossed over her chest; trembling.

"Beasts in the trees...." she repeated

He quickly gathered her up in his arms and sat on the bed. Her terror radiating off of her. He shushed her softly and rocked gently. With a finger under her chin, he tilted her face up to his.

"Come back to me princess," he whispered soothingly.

"It’s alright, you're safe. I will keep you safe. I've cut down bigger and scarier things in my life. My planet has a rancor infestation. I have you. It's alright," he continued to whisper and hold her until she came down. She splayed her hand on his chest over his hearts. Their strong beat acting as an anchor. She buried her face in his neck. Her breath hot on his skin.

That warm feeling pooled in his chest again. He ran his fingers across her forehead, swishing away the hair that had fallen over it. She finally pulled away to look into his eyes.

"T-thank you Savage... I don't know how much longer I could've lasted alone out here. I feel like I'm breaking as soon as the sun goes down." He thought about his next words carefully as he stroked her cheek.

"My people live in darkness. I have lived with and fought against its terrors all of my life. I swear to you I am strong enough to keep you from harm. Today I found myself... almost glad to have crashed here. Because of you, and what you can show me. But, mostly you princess," his face was hot. She pressed a tender kiss to his cheek.

"We should eat. You especially. I imagine you're starving. The rations aren't bad with the hot sauce I found," she smiled coyly at him.

    They ate in a comfortable silence. This time he watched as she slipped off her dress out of the corner of his eye. A feeling of want tingling under the surface. When they crawled in bed together, she wrapped her leg around him and lay her head on his chest. Listening to his hearts beat while he held her close to him.

She stayed like that all night and for the first time in years, she slept through the night.

[silversatoru]

hot chocolate

megumi x yuuji 

synopsis: megumi’s days get a little less boring when yuuji starts stopping by his coffee shop 

tags/warnings: fluff, college au!, coffee shop au!, characters are aged up, making out, swearing

word count: 3780

The whipped cream bottle whizzed and sputtered, the scarce remains of its contents flying all over the counter. Megumi stifled a few cuss words under his breath, silently cursing whoever finished the whipped cream and didn't replace it with a new one. He tossed it in the garbage and drug himself into the back of the shop in search of a fresh bottle. He was only two hours into his shift at his university's coffee shop, but it had easily been the longest two hours of his life. Midterms were this week, meaning every student on campus was stopping by for some extra caffeine to get through their day.

When he finally returned with his new container of whipped cream, the line of students had nearly doubled — what a hassle. He threw a quick, fluffy spiral of cream onto the drink he'd been working on and gave it to the customer, apologizing for the wait. He shoved the money into the old cash register and handed them their change, a small sigh leaving his lips as the next customer approached.

It was an athletic looking boy with pink spiky hair and a round face. He wore a baggy sweatshirt and sweatpants, and his rose-colored hair looked as if he had just rolled out of bed. Megumi didn't recognize him, which was weird because he had a knack for memorizing the faces of every student who walked in and out of the shop.

"Hi, what can I get for you today?" Megumi spoke in his signature monotone voice, too tired to add any customer service flare.

"I'm not sure," The boy stared up at the menu with a terribly confused expression on his face.

"What do you mean you're not sure?" Megumi stared at the boy like he had two heads — he'd been waiting in line for at least ten minutes and he still hadn't decided?

"Well, I don't actually like coffee. So, I'm not sure what to get," he stated bluntly.

"If you don't like coffee, why did you come to a coffee shop. We literally only sell coffee," Megumi deadpanned.

"Well, I want to try and force myself like coffee — acquire the taste, you know? For the caffeine and stuff. Maybe you could recommend me a drink?"

"Uh... yeah sure. I'll just make you what I usually get," Megumi had to forcibly stop himself from rolling his eyes at the customer.

"Okay, great!" The pink-haired student called after him as he walked over to the array of coffee machines.

Megumi grabbed a cup for hot beverages, sliding it under the latte machine and filling the it with the warm brown liquid. He stirred in some oat milk and a drizzle of honey before topping it off with a layer of cream. He made his way back over to the peculiar customer and carefully handed him the drink.

"It's a honey oat milk latte," Megumi stated plainly.

"I'm not even sure what a latte is, but thank you!" His lips twisted into a toothy smile as he handed Megumi his debit card.

The dark-haired boy swiped his card through then machine and finished the transaction before returning it to the boy, "Have a nice day".

"Thanks, you too! My name is Itadori Yuuji by the way, it was nice to meet you...," he squinted his eyes in attempt to read Megumi's name badge, "Fushiguro! That's a cool name".

"Uh, thanks. I have to help the next customer now," Megumi rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly — this whole interaction was so weird.

"Oh, right. Thank you again!" He called out as he turned and left the shop.

Megumi found it impossibly hard to concentrate on his job after that. For some reason his mind was consumed by his interaction with Itadori Yuuji — the peculiar pink-haired student. He found himself still thinking about it later that night, even after working all morning and attending classes all afternoon. No amount of school work was able to distract his mind from this stupid new boy.

When he woke up the next morning and slipped on his apron before heading to work, he wondered if the pink-haired boy would be back again today. He searched all morning for a head of fluffy pink hair amongst the hoards of students, but he never came.

Around ten o'clock the coffee shop always dies down, as all the students and teachers are in class. Megumi leaned back against the counter and pulled out his phone, mindlessly scrolling through twitter while he waited for a customer to show up.

The golden bells hanging from the front door emitted a soft ringing sound, signaling that someone had entered the shop. Megumi looked up to see a baggy sweatshirt and messy pink hair, and for some reason his heart jumped.

"Hey, Fushiguro!" Yuuji's face was plastered with a bright smile.

Megumi scrunched up his nose, it was weird for the boy to call him by his name — they didn't even know each other.

"Hey, how was the honey oat milk latte?" Megumi slid his phone back into his pocket and approached the counter.

"Oh, it was terrible. Fucking awful, actually," Yuuji's faced scrunched up in horror as he reminisced on the atrociously bitter flavor.

Megumi was genuinely offended. Yuuji could have told him he was the ugliest person he'd ever seen, that he had the personality of a brick wall, but to insult his coffee? That was crossing a line. Megumi knew his coffee-making skills were impeccable.

"Excuse me?" Was all he could manage.

"Yeah, it was probably one of the worst things I've ever put in my mouth. Anyway, I was hoping to try something different today," Yuuji said nonchalantly, his hands resting comfortably in the pocket of his hoodie.

"Okay..." Megumi took a deep breath, trying desperately to keep his cool, "What would you like to try?"

"Could you just make something for me again? I really don't know what to order".

"But you hated my last recommendation," Megumi stared at him blankly.

"Yeah... but eventually you'll have to make something I like," Yuuji insisted.

Megumi grumbled a quick "alright" and headed back over to the machinery, searching his mind for a recipe Yuuji might like. Eventually, he decided on a caramel macchiato — everyone likes those. He handed Yuuji the drink and the pink haired boy quickly payed before leaving the shop again.

Megumi watched him as he walked past the coffee shop windows and took a sip of his drink. The pink haired boy's face twisted with disgust, and he looked like he could barely keep the liquid down. He immediately took another sip, his body having the exact same reaction as the first time. Megumi let out a heavy sigh, shaking his head as he watched that absolute idiot until he could no longer see him.

He continued to refer to Yuuji as stupid, weird, or annoying, but that was completely contradictory to the fact that he couldn't get the pink-haired boy out of his mind. He found himself wondering if he would come back again for a third time, and if he did, what drink would Megumi make him? A small part of him was getting invested in this outlandish journey of finding a drink that Yuuji actually liked.

That night Megumi had a revelation — maybe hot coffee just wasn't Yuuji's thing. He decided that tomorrow he'd make him something cold, that was sure to work.

So, when the third day rolled around and Yuuji's messy pink hair came waltzing into the campus coffee shop, Megumi made him an iced cinnamon dolce latte. This time though, Yuuji followed him over to the array of coffee machines, asking him questions about how coffee was made. Megumi found himself explaining the entire process, from how the coffee is brewed to what sweeteners and creams he was adding to this particular beverage. He was honestly appalled by his own actions, he would never put in this kind of effort for any of his other customers — so what made Yuuji so different?

"So, what's your major?" Yuuji questioned while Megumi dusted some cinnamon over the top of his drink.

"Biology with a minor in veterinary technology," Megumi answered without looking up at him, snapping the plastic lid onto the coffee cup.

"Ohhh somebody's smart," Yuuji mused, "Animals, huh?"

"Yeah, they don't talk as much as people do," Megumi said, only half-joking.

"Right? People can be so annoying sometimes," Yuuji shook his head.

Megumi found his lips cracking into the tiniest smile — how ironic and blissfully unaware this boy was. He seemed to truly live life without a care in the world.

"What's yours?" Megumi asked, finally stretching out his arm and handing the pink-haired boy his iced coffee.

"Oh, sports med," Yuuji responded, his nose scrunching up as he took the first sip of his drink.

That answer didn't surprise Megumi at all, given the boy's athletic physique it was obvious he was into that sort of thing. The poor reaction to Megumi's coffee didn't surprise him either — this endeavor to find him a drink he likes is proving to be futile.

"Not good?"

"So bad," Yuuji shook his head, his eyes filled with despair and disgust, "We'll find one eventually though!"

"Maybe," Megumi didn't know it, but his face softened when he talked to Yuuji, his shoulders fell and his jaw unclenched.

There was so something so simple and calming about conversing with that strange boy.

"Well, thanks anyway! See you tomorrow Fushiguro!" His voice rung out through the shop — he really had no volume control when he spoke.

Megumi found himself watching Yuuji through the windows until he could no longer see him again —this was becoming a bad habit.

When the rush of students on their way to morning classes finally died down, one of his coworkers approached him.

"Sweet cream?" The boy questioned him, one of his eyebrows raised in suspicion.

His coworkers name was Inumaki Toge, and he was deaf and mute — selectively mute, anyway. He only communicated in words related to coffee, which was entirely too strange for most people, but Megumi didn't mind.

The two of them had been friends since Megumi first got this job two years ago. They'd even created their own communication system — Toge would talk in coffee terms, which translated to certain things that really only Megumi understood. Then, the dark-haired boy would respond in sign language, a skill he learned just so he could talk to the boy. It broke his stone-cold heart when he first started working here and saw Toge was always alone in the back of the shop. Most students didn't have the time or energy to learn a whole new language for the sake of someone they didn't know, but Megumi decided to put in the effort.

Megumi rolled his eyes, signing that no, he and the pink-haired boy were not friends.

"Americano," Toge furiously crossed his arms over his chest, accusing Megumi of lying to him.

I'm not lying! He's been coming here the past few days for coffee. I don't know why he talks to me so much, Megumi quickly signed back, his eyes narrowed at the white-haired boy.

Toge rolled his eyes at him in the hardest, most exaggerated way possible.

He's just a customer Toge, don't look at me like that, Megumi folded his fingers into the different signs, his frustration towards the mute boy growing.

"Espresso," Toge mumbled under his breath, twisting and returning to his spot at the back of the shop where would grind coffee beans and restock their shelves.

What? You're out of your fucking mind Toge. I do not like him, he's just a regular customer, Megumi angrily signed at him, but it was to no use, as the deaf boy had already turned around and was paying him no mind.

Their conversation lingered in his head for the remainder of the day though, because maybe Toge was onto something. Megumi was terrified to admit it, but Yuuji's daily visits had quickly become the best part of his day, even if he was kind of annoying.

And it continued to be the best part of his day for the next few weeks. Yuuji would come to the shop everyday and they would make pointless small talk while Megumi brewed him new drinks to try. Not a single one ever suited his palate, but he continued to return none the less. His motives were becoming questionable at this point — was he still coming for the coffee, or had this turned into something much bigger?

So, when winter break was right around the corner, and the last day of classes began, Megumi wondered what his days would be like when he didn't have their daily interactions to look forward to.

It was especially snowy today — enough to dust the ground and freeze the air, but not enough for classes to get canceled. Bundled students trudged in and out of the shop, buying coffees and hot chocolates in attempt to keep themselves warm. Their was an excited energy in the air though, it seemed everyone was thrilled for fall semester to be over — everyone except Megumi.

His heart skipped a few beats when Yuuji's familiar soft face appeared in the door.

"Hey, Megumi!" He called out, waving his had furiously through the air.

Somehow they had transitioned to a first name basis about a week ago — the dark-haired boy wasn't even sure how it happened but he certainty didn't mind it.

"Hey, you want something warm or cold today?"

"Definitely warm," Yuuji answered quickly, a shiver coursing its way through his body.

Megumi nodded, getting to work on something that he was sure Yuuji would like.

"Are you visiting family over break?" Yuuji wasted no time addressing their winter-break dilemma.

"No," Megumi shrugged his shoulders, he was one of the very few students who never went home on holidays.

"No family to visit. I live in an off-campus apartment so I just stay here over breaks".

Megumi expected Yuuji to frown, maybe even show him some pity for his unfortunate situation, but he did the complete opposite instead. He lips spread into the widest smile, and he swore he saw him jump in excitement.

"Me too! I used to visit my grandfather, but he died a couple years ago. My holidays have been pretty lonely".

Megumi looked up at him, a bewildered expression on his face. Who could have known that someone as cheerful as Yuuji was carrying such a burden?

"Where do you live? Maybe we could hang out over break," the pink-haired boy cocked his head to the side.

"Second street," Megumi answered, filling Yuuji's cup with steaming brown liquid.

He certainly wasn't opposed to the idea of seeing Yuuji more often, but it scared him just as much as it excited him.

"I live on Third! I can't believe we haven't run into each other before," Yuuji gasped.

Megumi wordlessly finished up the hot drink, subtly scribbling his address and his phone number onto the coffee label while the other boy blabbed on about how close they lived. When he was done he held it out to him, the pink-haired boy reaching out with his mitten-covered hands to take the drink.

He took a small sip and his eyes sparkled like they held the stars inside of them.

"This is so good! What kind is it?" Yuuji asked, eagerly taking another sip and inevitably burning his tongue on the hot beverage.

"Hot chocolate," Megumi spoke plainly, "I've come to the conclusion that it's impossible for you to like coffee".

"You're probably right," Yuuji nodded, "I think I'm more of a hot chocolate guy".

"No, you're a child with immature taste in drinks," Megumi scrunched up his nose.

Yuuji faked offense, and then held up his hand and attempted to flip Megumi off through his mitten — but it didn't really work.

That's when he noticed the dark-haired boy's phone number and address scribbled on the side of his cup. A light blush dusted over his cheeks and he offered Megumi a warm smile.

"I'll see you around!" He called.

A thousand butterflies flew around Megumi's stomach as he watched the boy leave and walk down the snowy sidewalk. What the hell kind of cheesy hallmark movie was his life turning into?

"Americano," Toge's accusatory voice shook Megumi out of his trance.

Okay fine, maybe I'm a liar. Fuck off, Megumi signed at him, to which the deaf boy chuckled to himself.

                                                             ☃

It was Christmas Eve now, and classes had ended a few days ago. Megumi checked his phone obsessively, but a text from Yuuji never appeared. He started to doubt that the boy actually meant what he said about wanting to hang out — maybe he was just being nice and Megumi had taken it the wrong way. He couldn't help but feel disappointed, no matter how much he wished he didn't care. He'd even taken a container of the coffee shops' hot chocolate powder for Yuuji. He planned on gifting it to him, because he had liked it so much.

So, when six o'clock at night rolled around and there was still no sign of the cheery pink-haired boy, he felt his heart squeeze in his chest. Who knew he was so invested in this idiot?

A light knock on his front door pulled him out of his thoughts, and his heart leaped into his throat. He peered through the small peep hole of his door and euphoria spread through his body — the stupid, spiky-haired boy had finally arrived.

He opened the door and Yuuji immediately blushed, his eyes wide as he looked around Megumi's apartment.

"Hi," He squeaked, "Sorry I didn't text or anything".

"It's okay," He ushered the boy inside and closed the door behind him.

"I stopped at a convenience store and bought some cookie dough. I thought we could make them, since yanno, it's a Christmas Eve thing".

Megumi found his own cheeks get warm at the other boy's forwardness. Baking cookies felt so familial, not like something you'd do with a coffee shop acquaintance. But none the less, he nodded his head and guided Yuuji into the kitchen.

The awkwardness between them quickly melted away as they rolled out the dough and attempted to cut out fun Christmas-themed shapes. Megumi chewed on his bottom lip as he focused on the intricate snowflake cookie was trying to make, his perfectionism getting way too involved. Yuuji on the other hand held up a half-smushed blob with a few spikes coming out of the top and two holes punched through the middle.

"It's you!" he laughed, holding his monstrosity of a cookie up for Megumi to see.

The dark-haired boy scoffed, "That's terrible, it looks nothing like me".

"Sorry, Mr. I'm smart and good at art. Are you sure you're not a sculpting student or something?" Yuuji stuck his nose in the air, carefully placing his Megumi cookie on the greased metal tray.

They each cut out a couple more shapes before the oven let out a loud ding to let them know it was preheated. Megumi picked up the tray and shuffled over to the oven, carefully placing it on the top rack. He closed the door before standing up and turning around — bumping right into Yuuji, who for some reason was standing right behind him. They were the exact same height, so Megumi's nose practically slammed into Yuuji's. He blushed furiously, quickly backing up into the counter.

"Sorry," he mumbled a quick apology, though Yuuji had been the one standing right behind him, so maybe he should apologize.

"Can I ask you a question?" Yuuji cocked his head to the side, completely ignoring Megumi's apology.

"Sure?" Megumi gave him a confused look.

"This is more than just two coffee shop friends hanging out, right? You can kick me out if I'm wrong, but if I'm right, I'd really like to kiss you while those cookies bake".

Megumi's eyes widened, his heart thumping hard against the walls of his chest. Of course he wanted to kiss Yuuji, he'd wanted to for weeks — it was all he thought about while he brewed him his stupid coffees everyday.

"Yeah... yeah, you're right," Megumi nodded, those few words were all that he could manage.

That clarification was all that Yuuji needed, a soft smile blossoming on his face before he stepped forward and cupped his fingers around the back of Megumi's neck. Heat spread through his face as their lips collided, every other one of his senses fading away as his body honed in on Yuuji's touch.

He'd been kissed before, several times by both men and women — but none of them compared to this. None of them were this gentle, soft, and electrifying all at the same time. Yuuji's fingers curled into the base of Megumi's hair, and he found his own hands tracing up the sides of the others' torso. He was completely drowning in the ocean that was Yuuji's lips, his mind growing foggy. He'd imagined what this would be like far too many times, but never once did he think it would be this good.

The ten minute timer Megumi had set on the oven started blaring through the kitchen, and he couldn't believe it had been that long already. A soft sigh escaped his throat as Yuuji pulled away, a smile tugging at the other's lips.

"I didn't expect so much experience from the quiet coffee barista," Yuuji poked at him, his eyes glistening with a fire that hadn't been there before.

"Don't judge a book by its cover, I guess," Megumi shrugged, grabbing his oven mitt and pulling the cookies out of the oven.

The pink-haired boy let out a light chuckle, immediately trying to grab a cookie off the metal sheet. Megumi swatted his hand away, insisting that the cookies would be too hot eat right away.

Megumi found his lips intertwined with Yuuji's again after setting down the tray — after all they'd have to pass the time while the cookies cooled somehow.

And so for the first time in a long time, Megumi didn't spend Christmas alone. Rather, he spent it with an overly-cheerful pink-haired boy who became a ray of sunshine in his life of clouds. Though he wished he liked his coffee, Megumi had no problem with brewing him hot chocolate instead. And he did, every morning for the rest of the spring semester he always had a cup of hot chocolate ready for Yuuji. He'd even stopped charging him for it at this point, throwing on a free drink discount every time he came.

[depressedacadamia]

How do you passive aggresively say fuck you in flower? Part II

Summary: It seems that Nico and Will just cant stop running into each other

A/N: FIRST WEEK OF EXAMS OVER, ONLY ONE WEEK TO GO!! Unfortunately, I am not able to write a lot due to tedious revision but I wrote this part 2 a while ago and thought that today would be the perfect time to release it! Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy and comment! <3 from me!

Read on AO3           Read Part I on tumblr

They were not expecting to see each other the next day at Uni. In fact, Will was so shocked, he had to pause and squint at the raven haired boy to check that he was the same as the customer 2 days ago. What was this dude doing here? This was the medical college!

Oh shit, what if he’s a new med student or a transfer student?

However, while it seemed that Will had noticed Nico, it seemed that Nico had not noticed Will; he couldn’t have been more appalled as he was ignored and he simply watched in despair as the italian jogged past him without a moment's pause. Not even a Hey, you’re the guy I made out with yesterday, right?

Will was used to having all his past hookups follow him like a sheep and sure, he hadn’t really hooked up with Nico but he was for some reason expecting some sort of reaction from him. Was he that forgettable?

He felt someone dig their elbow into his ribs and was about to shout What the fuck before he realised that Calypso was elbowing him.

“Calypso what!” He winced as he rubbed at his side, still in pain from Calypso’s pointy elbows.

“Do you think I should invite Leo to the dorm party?”

Will’s head perked up. “ Leo? Leo valdez?”

“Yes Leo Valdez, who else?” Calypso sighed.

“I thought you saw him making out with some guy at another party and then proceeded to pretend you never liked him in the first place-”

“- Which is true! I never liked Leo in the first place, he was just a friend!” Calypso desperately defended.

“Everytime someone says they’re just a friend and not they’re just my friend, you know that they’ve crushed on them.”

“Shut up.” Calypso whacked her bag over Will’s head, ignoring his shouts of protests.

Will’s hands instinctively went over his head, tucking his chin in to prevent himself from gaining any brain damage from Calypso. “ Hey, Hey! I work for you, little shit!”

“Exactly, I can fire you any second I want to!” Calypso boasted before remembering something. “ Wasn’t there a request that came in on Saturday? Something like fuck you?”

Will could feel the blood rushing to his cheeks. “ Uh, yeah, maybe. I don’t really remember.”

Calypso recognised that tone. That tone was the same tone used during the walk of shame, that tone meant things that she did not want in her shop. Turning her head only halfway, she gave Will a grimace, praying that it hadn’t happened again.

“William Andrew Solace, Please please tell me that you didn’t have sex with another client in my shop!”

“For once,” Will smirked. “ For once, I can actually say that I didn’t.”

Calypso sighed in relief, all the tension in her body simply oozing out all at once. Her shoulders dropped and the tense expression on her face was replaced by her regular small smile that she constantly wore, causing her to seem quite shy, which technically she was.

“You know, you seriously have some nerve Callie, hitting your employees like that. That could be harassment. What happened to the shy girl who could tell me the latin name for any plant out there?”

“Just because I don’t hook up with every good looking breathing thing, does not mean I’m shy.” She put her hands on her hips and took several confident steps while swaying her hips before hitting a hard chest with a thud and feeling the hard floor on her butt. Frustrated, she huffed and without even looking at the perpetrator, began to shout,

“Are you blind or stupid? Look where you’re going for fuck sake.” She ignored the offered hand and got up herself, brushing her scraped hands on her pants.

It was only when Will nudged her, not very discreetly may I add, that she noticed that it was Leo Valdez who was offering the outstretched hand and another very scary looking dude standing by Leo. However, something about him seemed familiar- from the shape of his body to his hair and in particular his jawline. She remembered seeing it somewhere.

Fuck, that was the guy Leo was making out with at that party. She realised.

Simultaneously, Will was thinking- Fuck, that was Nico di Angelo.

“Sorry Leo, Calypso,” Will turned to her, completely avoiding Nico. “ Do you have anything you’d like to say to Leo?”

Claypso gave a bitter look to Will before remebering that Leo fucking Valdez was standing infront of her and she had essentialy told him to fuck off. She had to fight the blush rising to the tip of her ears and could only manage to muster a small pipsqueak of ‘sorry’ while looking down at the floor and having her face curtained by her chestnut hair.

Unexpectedly, she felt a hand move the hair out of her face and slip and finger underneath her chin and tilt it up slightly.

“The least you could do while apologising is look at him,” Nico snarled, standing off to the side, watching as Leo brushed her hair out of the way. Leo turned his head to raise an eyebrow that meant Not cool dude before looking back at Calypso, his eyes warm and his smile generous.

“Sorry about him, he’s running low on social interaction juice. Are you okay there?”

Calypso thought she could feel herself gaping- the worst part was that her little shit of a friend Will pointed it out.

“Close your mouth Callie, you’ll get flies. It’s impolite to stare as well,” Will drawled, his eyes still glued away from Nico. Leo glanced at Calypso’s injured hands, the small scrapes and the little cuts across her palms. His frown was cute, with his eyebrows scrunching up and his eyes pooled with concern as he took her hands in his.

“Oh, Dios mio. I’m so sorry- will you forgive me if I clean these up for you?” Leo held her hands gently, as to not hurt her.

Will butted in before Calypso could respond. “Uh, no, that’s not necessary. I can help her from here!”

Nico snorted. “ Yeah, the med- student definitely knows how to clean up his cuts.”

Will growled in response, unappreciative of Nico’s sarcasm. Leo’s frown in concern only grew, the small displays of guilt visible across his face. “ Are you sure? It’s the least I could do after causing you to fall.”

“No it's fine-”

“-Will, calm down. Yes, I’ll go, but you also owe me,” Calypso confirmed. You know your worth, you know your worth, She chanted in her head.

“Well well, a person who knows what they want, of course, I am in your debt. After you.” Leo pointed to the pavement ahead as he left Will and Nico alone. Nico looked Will up and down before letting out a little snort and walking off, not before giving him a little shove with his shoulder as he walked past.

Will was officially outraged. Who the fuck did this guy think he was? First of all, he was barging into the medical college when he didn’t even attend it, then he was barging him to the floor without even apologising and then laughing about it!

Will turned around while still on the floor and yelled. “Who the fuck do you think you’re pushing dipshit?”

Will really thought he had the upper hand. He was taller, felt he was relatively stronger and his reflexes were okay. But when he saw Percy Jackson, Jason Grace, Piper Mclean, Hazel Levesque, Frank Zhang and Annabeth Chase all crowd round Nico, he felt he was the most screwed person in the world. Luckily for him, no one except a girl with brown skin and confused expression turned around.

Will recognised her as Piper Mclean- she had been voted most beautiful girl in the entire Uni. It was rumoured for a while that she and Jason were dating but ever since Will spotted Piper blushing near a new girl, he highly doubted it. Piper raised an eyebrow and Will gave a sheepish smile as he tried to get up.

Piper scurried over, giving her friends a quick wave before running over to help Will. He accepted her hand, mainly because he was terrified that she may kill him if he didn’t.

“Did Nico knock you down here?” Piper asked as Will heaved himself up. Her voice was sweet, soft and had some element that convinced Will that he could trust her; however, at the same time, he didn’t want to snitch on Nico. He gave a blatant shrug and hoped for the best.

“Don’t worry, Nico always teases people he likes. Little idiot isn’t good at showing any emotion other than being horny or being an arsehole.”

“Are you sure those are emotions?”

“I take psychology so I sure as hell hope they are,” Piper confessed, laughing a bit. Will finally realised why everybody considered Piper so beautiful- she wasn’t just a pretty person, she was a nice person. She went out of her way to help others.

“I take medicine so I’m going to hope for the best that Nico doesn’t kill me. He avoids like I’m the plague then acts like he’s planning on murdering me in my sleep.”

“Wait.” Piper paused before turning to Will with a manic grin on her face. “Are you the guy from the flower shop who made the fuck you bouquet and slept with Nico?”

“We didn’t sleep together!”

But Piper wasn’t listening, she was calling Hazel over. Will watched as a girl with gorgeous dark skin that glowed in the sunlight and a tattoo over her left hand turned her head ever so slightly. Will realised why they called her Death’s sister.

She was undoubtedly beautiful but her silent aura was terrifying, like it was driving you to death itself. Large brown eyes that invited you into the darkness and hands that looked sculpted for leading one to their doom.

“Hey Hazelnut! This is the guy who stole Nico from Leo! And he made the Fuck you bouquet that Annabeth gave Percy!”

Will could feel his heart pounding as Hazel left the group and walked slowly to Piper and Will, her expression never changing. Suddenly, when she was close enough to throw a punch, she broke out into a childish grin and started squealing.

“So you’re the one who made Percy that bouquet!” Hazel grabbed Will’s hands and started shaking them excitedly. She giggled before giving them back to him.

“What does making Percy this bouquet have to do with any of this? I only knew Nico because we made out like once and then the fucker blanked me.”

“That’s my little brother you're talking about,” Hazel warned. Will instantly felt his eyes widened in horror before apologizing profusely; he remembered what Nico had told him about his sister and how the two of them had grown up. Hazel laughed before telling him that she was only joking and that he should let loose a bit.

“Was Nico with Leo when he ignored you? Leo Valdez? About yee tall, messy brown hair and ink on his overalls?”

“Yes…” Will nodded.

“Ahhh, that explains it. Those two have a complicated history. He was probably ignoring you because he and Leo might have gotten back together. Or maybe he just didn’t want Leo to know that he made out with you. Or…” Piper let out a grin that Will had no desire to learn the true meaning of.

“Maybe he was just using Leo to make you jealous,” Piper explained, very much used to the drama herself between Nico and Leo. If it wasn’t Percy and Annabeth, Nico and Leo were almost always in an argument.

“So…” Will was deadly silent for a second while his rage began to simmer. “ Are you telling me he cheated on that Leo kid with me?”

“ I really hope not,” Hazel grimaced, looking back at her brother.

“The little fucker,” Will muttered under his breath as he pushed past the two ladies and made his way towards the remaining group. He didn’t care that he was going to run into Percy Jackson, whom he’d had an underlying grudge with for as long as he’d been going to school, he was furious.

How dare he cheat with him. What was Will, some slut who ruined relationships? Hell no. Sure, he slept around but he didn’t go around getting into relationships and creating drama. One night stands were his protocol.

“You!” Will pointed at Nico viciously, his finger almost touching Nico’s nose. The rest of the group simply watched with amusement as Piper held back Jason, whispering who exactly Will was.

“You little cheating seething whore! What the fuck dude! You just make out with whoever you buy shit from?”

“I don't remember you having much of a problem with it.” Nico shrugged, only infuriating Will that much more. He was so tempted to just punch him then and there, in front of everybody including 6 of the most intimidating people he’d ever seen.

“I don't remember you mentioning you had a boyfriend before you jumped me,” Will spat. Nico seemed a little shocked at that comment, his lips shaping into a small ‘o’ before he let a sultry smirk spread across his face in a manner that showed he was relatively proud of himself, only pissing Will off so much more.

Why was the damned bastard smirking?

“Huh, what boyfriend?” Nico turned to Annabeth. “ Hey, Annie, do I have a boyfriend?”

Annabeth looked down at her watch for dramatic effect. “As of 4 months, you have been boyfriend free,” She started and only continued when she saw the smug look on Nico’s face. “That said, that does not mean you have been booty call free for said months.”

“What do you mean!” Nico cried.

“Oh shut it Nico, everyone knows that you and Leo have been playing each other’s booty call for ages now. Just end it and go out with the florist dude,” Frank scoffed.

“Or don’t! The florist dude sounds like a real ass!” Percy cut in, desperate to not let Nico go out with his lifelong nemesis, William Andrew Solace.

“Oh look, it’s Perseus,” Will taunted. Percy felt himself going red and the entire group went quiet. Will looked around, wondering why everyone was silent.

“Oh, you guys don’t know?” Will smirked, looking directly at Percy, the knowledge on the tip of his tongue. “ That’s what everybody called Percy in middle school, after we learnt the myth of P-”

The rest of the sentence was muffled as Will felt a hand wrap itself around his mouth. He looked up and saw the sea green eyes that read Shut the fuck up . Will, feeling nostalgia from this certain situation, smirked and stuck his tongue out, licking Percy’s hands, eliciting a yelp of disgust from Percy.

“Dude! Why do you always do that! Every fucking time I’m trying to shut you up, you pull shit like this!”

“You’re telling me that wasn’t the first time you tried to ‘shut him up’?” Nico and Annabeth both asked, hostility floating in their voices. Will gave a jolly smile at Percy who groaned and wiped his hands on Will’s shirt, muttering ‘gross’ under his breath. Will shoved Percy who proceeded to make a face back.

“How do you two know each other?” Frank asked, completely confused before Hazel went up on her tiptoes and began whispering in Frank's ear while he nodded along.

Nico, sick of Will’s attention not being focused on him butted in. “ Did you come all this way to flirt with Percy or what?”

Percy and Will both gagged and shivered, the idea of liking each other being just gross.

“I’m here because you son of a bitch, used me!” Will cried, flinging his arms out.

Nico raised an eyebrow. “I did?”

“Your boyfriend, booty call, whatever you wanna call them- was right there and I was just some pawn for you-”

“-If I wasn’t talking or paying any attention to you whatsoever, how on earth would I make them jealous?”

Will didn’t respond, his mind racking for answers, excuses, insults he could fling at the raven haired boy. He noticed he wasn’t wearing his lip ring that day.

“I think you should focus on the fact that Leo and I just so happened to be at the Medical College despite our majors being nothing related and we just so, by chance, crashed into you and your friend,” Nico hinted. He was a bit tired from how oblivious this blond guy was- hadn’t he made it obvious?

Will took a while to connect a few dots, but the problem was that he only connected the exact dots that Nico did not want him to connect.

“Wait, so Leo does like Callie? Is that why you guys are here?”

Nico wanted to fucking facepalm.

Saturday

The shop bell rang. Calypso was sitting at the counter with her apprentice, Meg. They were both chatting, something to do with the variation of a certain dandelion- Will wasn’t very sure.

He was sporting a daisy chain around his wrist that Meg had forced him to wear and a pink rose had been braided into his hair after much argument with Calypso that the thorns would hurt, in which she retorted that she’d obviously clip the bloody thorns.

When the bell rang, none of the three workers really snapped their heads up. But when the bell rang, and then rang and then rang again, they slowly lifted their heads from their conversation. Will, who had been leaning his elbows on the counter to talk to the two ladies, turned his head to see 8, very unwelcome people, walk into his shop.

Nico was standing there with all 7 of hids friends- Percy, Annabeth, Frank, Hazel, Piper, Jason and Leo. All of whom were very much not welcome in any way whatsoever in this shop.

“What are you doing here?”

The friends all glanced at one another before a few sputters of laughter were spread out. Nico, who was wearing his lip ring again, walked forward and picked up a red rose, twirling the thorny flower in his two fingers, ignoring the small prick it made.

He noticed the blood trickling down his thumb and lifted the injury to his lips.

“Didn’t I tell you last time...” Nico asked, his voice teasing but also malicious, a small corner of his lips stained red. “That you’ll be seeing a lot more of us?”

[tngrace]

Bright Lights, Big City

This is for one of my best friends in the whole world. Today is her birthday and I wanted to write something for her. I hope you love it boo, @justkillingtimewhileiwait

read here on A03; 911 LS masterlist

The Strand-Reyes household always looked forward to the two weeks before Christmas. TK and Carlos had kept with tradition even in their newest positions as paramedic and detective and saved vacation for the week of Christmas and New Years. This year they were leaving the day after Christmas really early in the morning to go to NYC to visit Gwyn. It was the first time the family was travelling to NYC and there was a lot of excitement and a lot of anxiety. Carlos had never flown before and he was a little anxious about it if he were being honest. TK assured him it would be fine, but Carlos wasn’t sure he believed him. 

Christmas Day was eventful as always. Gabriel, Andrea, and Owen came over for breakfast and to watch the kids open presents. Later in the afternoon, the rest of the crew and Carlos’s partner came over for dinner and to play with the kids. Carlos and TK took the time the kids were occupied with their aunts and uncles to finish the last minute packing. “TK are you sure about this? Ryder hasn’t been feeling the best, airports are going to be so crowded, it’s snowing in NYC, and what if the flights are delayed or….”

TK cradles Carlos’s face. “Deep breath babe.” They take a couple of exaggerated breaths together. “I know you’re nervous about flying, but I promise it’s not that bad. The kids will be fine. We’ll pack his allergy meds. We got this.” 

Carlos nods as he rests his forehead against TK’s. “We got this,” he murmurs. 

“Maybe I’ll blow you before we get on the plane,” TK smirks as he wiggles his eyebrows at Carlos. 

“And who would watch our children?” he deadpans back. TK laughs at him and goes back to packing. “I can do it tonight once they’re asleep. We just have to be at the airport by four in the morning.” 

“You’re a menace,” he grunts as he shakes his head. “But I love you anyways.” Carlos’s smile is bright as always when declaring his love for TK and TK returns the smile with equal amounts of love. 

Their friends and family eventually leave, and TK and Carlos get the kids in bed. TK makes good on his promise, which does help relax Carlos, but he'd never admit that to TK. They get the car packed and load the sleeping kids. Thankfully, they stay asleep on the drive to the airport and all through check in. Ryder is slightly fussy when he wakes, but TK gets him his meds and juice and he settles right into TK’s chest. Sofia is her normal happy self when she wakes. She’s excited to be going to see her Mimi, but she’s also picked up on her Papa’s nerves about flying. They’ve both done their best to reassure her, but she really feeds off Carlos. The kids are awake for about an hour, when they are called to board. TK sends Gwyn a text letting her know they’re boarding and will see her soon. 

Unfortunately for Carlos, their seats are over the wheels. They’ve switched kids hoping that TK’s calm demeanor will help Sofia stay calm. Ryder is dozing on Carlos, the meds making him sleepy when they start moving. Carlos is doing his best to stay calm, but honestly he’s freaking out. When they start climbing in the air, the wheels come up, and it's loud. Carlos tenses even more as Sofia starts crying. She buries her face in TK’s neck as he tries to calm her. “It’s fine; it’s going to be ok, baby girl. Nothing is wrong. They’re just pulling the wheels up.” He rubs her back as he calms her, and he squeezes Carlos’s hand. “It’s ok babe. Everything is fine.” 

Sofia calms down at TK’s quiet reassurances and thankfully the rest of the flight goes smoothly. Ryder is a little grumpy at being woken and jostled as they get off, but Carlos does his best to keep him happy. They head over to baggage claim, TK letting Gwyn know they were getting their luggage. The kids stayed in their parents arms, both clinging to them at the loud and busy airport. It was a shock to all of them except for TK. “You’ve got to be getting me,” TK groans when he reads Gwyn’s response. 

“What’s wrong?” Carlos takes Sofia so TK can get the luggage. 

“Mom’s at the office. We have to get a cab.” TK’s frustration with his mom is apparent, especially since Gwyn knew they were coming. Carlos nods as they push their way through the airport. “Cab won’t be that bad.” TK gives him the side eye and Carlos just sighs. Before they’re able to flag down a cab, TK spots someone he wasn’t sure he’d ever see again. “TK?” 

“Enzo?” TK asks with confusion. 

“Yea. Hey kid. Your mom said you were coming into town. I thought she was picking you up.” 

“Uh… yea. She was supposed to, but apparently she’s still at the office. We were just catching a cab. Wait… you’ve been in contact with mom recently?” TK was confused because he thought Enzo and his mom were done a few years ago. 

Enzo looks between him and Carlos holding the kids as he scratches at the back of his neck. “Uh… yea. We.. uh… I take it she hasn’t told you?” 

“Told me what exactly?” TK can feel Carlos becoming increasingly more uncomfortable with the situation as people mill around them. It’s hard for his husband to turn off his cop brain, and large crowds tend to put him on edge, especially when the kids are with them. Add that to a complete stranger to him that is putting TK on edge, and Carlos’s patience wears thin quickly.

Enzo seems to want to avoid answering TK’s question. “Why don’t I drop you four off at your mom’s and she’ll explain everything?” 

“Yes. Thanks,” Carlos pipes up. He knows TK would’ve argued until he got his answers, and he doesn’t blame him, but he’d be happier if they got out of the airport. TK gives him the side eye again, and Carlos just shrugs nodding to the kids who have both buried their faces in his neck at this point. TK nods his assent, and they follow Enzo to his car. Enzo helps TK load their luggage while Carlos gets in the back with the kids. They’d brought a car seat for Ryder so Carlos strapped it in while Sofia held Ryder for him. “Thank you baby girl,” he grins as he takes Ryder strapping him in. He makes sure Sofia is strapped in as he settles between them, and TK gets in the front with Enzo. The car ride to Gwyn’s place is silent, and the kids can pick up on the tension. “Papa me want out,” Ryder cries when the tension filled silence gets to be too much for him. 

“It’s ok buddy. We’ll be at Mimi’s in no time,” he tries to comfort him. He gives him his stuffed dog that he absolutely loves, and Ryder settles some. When they get to Gwyn’s TK is out of the car before Carlos can even blink. “TK come on,” Enzo says, getting out following him. 

“No. You don’t want to explain anything so there’s nothing to say. My son’s allergies are acting up, my kids feed off tension, and this is Carlos’s first time in the city. It's not fair to them for mom to be pulling some drama right off the bat. We’re tired. I’ll talk to mom later.” 

“TK…” Carlos gets the kids out as TK slams the trunk shut. 

“Enzo, you’ve always been straight with me. You’ve always been good to me. I don’t want to jeopardize that by saying the wrong thing right now. So I’m going to go upstairs and get my family settled, and I’m sure I’ll see you this week if my assumptions are correct.”

Enzo just nods and steps back. “Nice to meet you,” Carlos tells him as he follows TK inside the fancy apartment building. They get on the elevator and head upstairs. Luckily the bellhop knows TK and lets them into the apartment since TK doesn't have a spare key. Carlos is in awe at how gorgeous it is. The apartment is immaculate, and the view is breathtaking. “Uh.. TK,” Carlos says holding the kids. 

“Yea?” TK asks, giving him a confused look. 

“This place is… the kids will…” 

TK chuckles softly as he walks back over to his husband. “Yea… mom’s place is really nice, but she offered to let us stay here. She knows the kids won’t be perfect. It’s fine. I promise,” TK says, reaching for Ryder. 

“Daddy… me snuffy,” he says, rubbing his eyes and sniffing. 

“I know little man. Let's get settled and get some medicine and juice?” Ryder nods as TK takes him. 

“Papa, can I go look around?” Sofia asks. 

“Yea baby girl. Just.. be careful.” Gwyn’s apartment is honestly putting Carlos on edge because of how perfect it is. 

“Carlos, come here,” TK quietly demands. 

He sits down beside TK on the couch. Ryder has taken his medicine and is content sitting on the couch with them for the moment. “It’s ok babe. I know it looks like a lot, but she’s not going to be mad if they get it a little dirty.” 

“I know… it’s just a lot… it’s just not home.” He gives TK a bashful shrug. He is looking forward to exploring TK’s city, but he feels like he needs some sleep and comfort. 

“I get it.” TK gives his hand a squeeze with a reassuring soft kiss. “So tonight we’re ordering some of my favorite takeout and having a night in,” he smiles as Sofia rejoins them. 

"Sounds good," Carlos smiles. TK takes care of ordering the takeout while Carlos takes a quick shower to wash away the traveling grime. Ryder joins him letting the steam from the shower help his stuffy nose. "Feeling ok little man?" Carlos asks, scrubbing his head with shampoo. 

"Mecine hewps," he grins up at Carlos. 

"It sure does," Carlos chuckles. Once they're done, Carlos dresses in some sweats and gets Ryder in his pj's. Sofia takes a quick shower next and gets in her pj's. By the time that's done, the food has arrived and still no Gwyn. Carlos can tell it's grating on TK's nerves that she's at the office, but he's trying not to let it show to the kids. They're all in bed by the time Gwyn shows up. 

The next morning is rough. TK and Gwyn get into a huge argument before she goes to work. TK apologizes to Carlos, but Carlos assures him everything is ok. They take the kids out to tour the city and all the places TK loves. The kids absolutely love the snow, and TK insists on building snowmen and making snow angels in the park. The kids have a blast, but Carlos hates the cold. Texas usually doesn't get this cold, and it leaves him feeling cold all the time. TK is highly amused at how grumpy Carlos gets when cold, but he doesn't mind the extra snuggles from his husband. 

It took until two days before they're supposed to leave before Gwyn takes time off work and actually talks with TK. Carlos and the kids hung out in the guest room watching TV, and Carlos just prayed the TV was loud enough to drown them out. Her and Enzo reconciled to an extent; they'd been hooking up when time allowed, but she didn't want TK to get his hopes up. TK had to remind her he was a grown adult that lived in another state. As long as she was happy, he didn't care what she did, but he didn't like the lying and secrets. He especially didn't like her working over their vacation when they came to spend time with her and he definitely let her know it. They eventually talked it out, and Enzo joined them for dinner that night at a fancy restaurant of Gwyn's choosing. It was definitely more high end then Carlos would have chosen, but it was nice and thankfully the kids were well behaved. 

Carlos had enjoyed seeing TK's city and where he grew up. He loved seeing his husband in that different light, but he honestly couldn't wait to get back home. The cold weather had not done any favors to Ryder's allergies, and Gwyn spent their last day nagging TK about how they were taking care of him, and what they should be doing differently. Carlos’s nerves were honestly frayed and he knew Sofia was feeding off the tension from him and between TK and Gwyn. "Mom, seriously. Just let us be for the night and tomorrow we'll be back in Austin," TK finally said having had enough. The look of surprise on Gwyn’s face was honestly amusing because she was honestly clueless when it came to TK at times. Thankfully after that little blow up, they were able to pack and get the kids settled for the night. "If we ever come back, we're getting a motel," TK whines as they climb in bed. "I honestly thought she'd be better with the kids. I'm sorry this week has been so stressful," he whispers, kissing apologies into Carlos's skin. 

"Stop. You have nothing to apologize for. This week has been fine, and I've loved getting to see your city. Just maybe… come back when it's warmer." It gets the laugh he was hoping for, and they eventually drift off to sleep. 

The plane ride back to Austin is a little smoother. Carlos nor Sofia like it any better, but they at least knew what to expect. They were all definitely glad to be home, and if it was a few more years before they went back to NYC well they blamed work for keeping them busy.