#anyway i am here for questions and i know resources to point you towards if im unsure

[crazylittlejester]

That update was SO GOOD- I immediately went to your blog the minute I saw it LMAO (sorry for the like spam)

WARS WARS WARS!!!! HE IS SO PRECIOUS HERE- I love how we get to see a bit of his perspective on the dungeons vs battleground, and how respectful he is. He could’ve called it immoral to loot ruins/temples, but instead he highlights how they went “under Ganon’s snout” and were stealthy and resourceful. In comparison he was constantly in the limelight in his Hyrule, no where to hide or lie low someplace fortified like a temple. He doesn’t discredit their methods, just simply points out the battlefield also had its advantages. He’s a good mans!!!!!

I really hope we get to hear more about his experiences though, both for his character but to also see how the others take it as well. How different it must’ve been for him, what it must’ve been like to constantly be fighting day in and day out, and not just exploring like we often see in other games, how intimidating it must’ve felt for Wars to be the first anomaly in the cycle in quite some time (if he knew of any past legends).

Also!! Do u think there might be some doubts towards Wars from the chain because of this? We saw how Twi and Four (and maybe one more?) were questioning to each other how unusual it was for a warrior of Hyrule to not do a dungeon, and how he may not know certain monsters. That worries me on how that could reflect their view of Warriors. Will they start to doubt his strategies? Will they waste time arguing if they think he hasn’t fought a certain monster? While I don’t think they won’t trust him, I can definitely see some concerns sprouting about what he, and by extension the rest of the chain, truly know about other monsters.

I also like how Time didn’t react negatively at Wars’ statement, beyond just an odd look. It goes to show that it isn’t an issue for him because he’s seen Wars’ skills and trusts that even if he has different experiences, he’s still valuable and knowledgeable. Also- with Wars being right behind Time and sorta backing each other up, I think we’re starting to see more of co-leader/second in command Warriors and I LOVE THAT- PLS PLS MORE CO-LEADER WARS PLS!!!!!

Anyway- thems be my crazy thoughts on the update. I hope this means that Wars can finally get some proper recognition and love as we learn about him through the comic!!!!

ALKSJLKSJ don’t worry about the like spam i dont care at all. Also sorry it took me to long to answer this! I really wanted to make sure i could sit down and read the whole thing, i’ve been a little busy running around today

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH, he’s gonna hate the dungeons so much i think… Like I think he’ll like the puzzles and such, but I don’t think he’ll appreciate how cramped everything is or how monsters can drop from the ceilings like that. But yes I also love how he doesn’t like, call their dungeons stupid or anything he’s just kinda like “Am i the weird one for not willingly walking into a death trap- apparently”

I ALSO REALLY WANT TO HEAR MORE ABOUT HIS EXPERIENCES, and I want to see him compare more things about the war to what the others have been through! It’d be so interesting to see Jojo’s take on all that

Personally, I don’t think they’ll necessarily DOUBT him because of his lack of dungeon experience. They’ve seen how fully capable is, how strong and reliable he is, he knows what he’s doing and he’s a strategist and THEY know all that too. However, I can absolutely see him suggesting they do something in the dungeon and everyone else going “you NEVER do that first in a dungeon oh my god??” because he just doesn’t know how dungeons work. I think they might look out for him (?) more, in the sense that he’s out of his element. He has a leader personality, and he’s going to have to let the more experienced people in the group choose what to do in the dungeon and help figure out puzzles or look for hidden hallways and treasure and such, cos he’s not really used to doing that kinda stuff. I don’t think the others will doubt his abilities, I guess I just think they’re more in shock that he’s just never done that?? And it’s something they’ll just be consciously aware of (sorry if that didn’t make sense my brain is mush and my head hurts 🥺)

TIME WAS SO FUCKING OVER IT, I LOVED WARS LOOKIN AT HIM LIKE “Am i weird 🥺” AND TIME STARING BACK AT HIM LIKE “🤨”. I’m genuinely obsessed with that shot of them looking like the disappointed parents. Every time those two interact I do a little spin because i am gods most normal man ever (and i headcanon they’ve met before this. i know it ain’t canon but i still like the idea of them being close in actual lu canon)

the best part of this update was all the people who were like “Wars fans… I get it now.” like we won. we won guys, we won

[redditreceipts]

I've been a very staunch supporter of trans ppl for years. I have learned to swallow my discomfort around some of the things said in those circles. When they said it was transphobic for lesbians to not like dick, I bit my tongue. I told myself, "this is just the loud minority" and to be fair I do think that is the minority but still ... as a lesbian I wasn't even able to talk about people who argued that because "it never happens. No one says that. That sounds like a transphobic lie." And I hate the constant assertions that gender is real, innate, and that everyone feels it. I can't describe my own experiences with growing up as a woman without someone telling me that maybe I'm nonbinary ... no thanks I tried that for a while. I respect everyone's gender, or I want to, but apparently doing that also requires me to put that oppressive structure onto myself and act like it's liberating.

The final snapping point for me was a trans woman telling me that I'm privileged for being a cis woman because I've never experienced dysphoria ... except I have. I grew up with intense thoughts about my body and hating my vagina and breasts. It was never that bad but I would often imagine mutilating. I'm in a better place now but I still feel some discomfort over my body sometimes. And when I expressed this to her, she asked me if I was really cis or was still questioning ...

They act like misogyny doesn't exist or something. I just ... I disagree with a lot of radical feminists beliefs or at least I think I do. But for years I have felt like radfems were the only ones even talking about misogyny anymore so idk

Anyway what I wanted to say is that I really like your posts and perspectives and thanks for this blog. I want to learn more and question more and your blog has become a helpful resource to help me start thinking critically about some things

Hey :) thanks for writing to me and sorry for the late answer. 

And yeah, you are totally right. I have also spent such a long time justifying gender ideology because I really wanted it to be right. I’ve excused so much weird behaviour with weird mental gymnastics because I didn’t want to accept that I had been wrong for such a long time. 

The entire “that never happens” thing - and then you show them an occasion where it happened, and they say “well, it doesn’t happen that much”. And yeah, people have suggested me being non-binary as well. I mean, by strict gender definitions I am non-binary because I don’t identify as a woman lmao. Just as the “you’re uncomfortable in your body?? what about fucking cutting it up??!!!!” thing. 

And for disagreeing with feminist beliefs, the thing is that being a feminist is not a package deal. You are not being some sort of heretic if you disagree with certain things, and I know that I am most probably wrong on a lot of stuff myself. If I wasn’t, I would be the first person who is always right in human history. And yes, even in feminist spaces, there is sometimes some sort of imperative to follow every single belief or you are not a “real feminist”. But being a feminist is not an identity, it is an action. It is an action towards yourself, in the workplace, in interaction with other women and men, in your consumption, in your voting, in how you support women in your personal life and how you do political action. So yeah, I would say that it is less important whether you follow every rule of the radical feminist catechism and more important to support women in your life (which includes yourself). At least, that’s my opinion. 

So if you want to learn more, you can look into literally anything Julie Bindel says on Youtube, I really like her perspective. And cool that you’re here! 

[reimenaashelyee]

This is maybe not so important to announce but it's going to affect my online activity/webcomic updates, so here it is:

I am going back to school and pursuing a Masters in Arts Management until 2025

If you recall, I have spoken several times in my blog about my past life in academia, the quarter-life crisis that resulted from it (not the full story), and the occasional spasm of desiring institutional recognition.

I am willingly! voluntarily! going back through the gates of the ivory tower.

For the past few years now, I’ve been slowly crabwalking towards an administrative, organisational, educational/resource-providing, leadership-type role in my areas of work (comics, writing, illustration, commercial art).

I hinted about somewhat being sick of the physical and emotional investment of comics-making trapping me to the same four-walls. The 2-ish years of hard commitment that each graphic novel demands is something that I don’t mind doing, especially for a story I truly believe in. However, I cannot keep doing this consecutively. For two years, I keep having visions of myself in my late-fifties asking me, now, if this is all worth it: to devote all this time to make comics that people like, but to not have a life lived? I am thinking of those mangaka who spend all their time breathing eating knowing only comics, and then suddenly, dying with not much to show except their impressive body of work. Did they see enough of the world? Did they eat enough good food? Have they discovered all their non-comics passions? I certainly don’t want my ghost to ask the same questions when she sees my body.

In a way I’ve sort of outgrown that shine of comics as a full-time job: ironically, in my success at producing audience/market-friendly work in exchange for financial support, I do not have time at all to pursue experimental, personal play and art that truly speaks to me. I’m also facing the reality that, as much as I enjoy working in traditional publishing, I am running out of ideas. I only have 2 to 3 more stories left in me for young adult/middle grade graphic novels. After that? I don’t know…

(Unless the new graphic novel imprints are suddenly hungry for adult work. Because, boy, do I have ten billion ideas.)

Anyway, the situation is that the majority of the graphic novel space in traditional publishing is still cashing in on the boom for middle-grade/young adult stories, with no long-sighted consideration for catering to those readers who will eventually, definitely grow up into adults. Meanwhile, I am running out of kids stories and am desperate to make bloody, complicated work (the kind of stuff I was already making pre-success and am still making), and to disentangle the actual act of creating from income-making. Not in the sense that I don’t want money at all from my comics; just that I don’t want comics to be my primary source of income anymore. And personally… I just want more time to live and be offline.

So this is the emotional aspect that’s been motivating my crabwalking. Still, if that was not a factor, this was always going to be the natural progression of my career anyway.

Like, considering that I began my career as co-founder of a regional comics network and my life-long practice of creating resources, it’s not that surprising. Even when I formally officialised my career in 2018 as a Traditionally Published, Professional Comics Creator in the Mid-list, I was also engaging in the administrative with my dayjob at Hiveworks, in addition to the aforementioned regional comics network UNNAMED, and now, the Cartoonist Cooperative. I continually make resources and facilitate them. The dayjob is expanding to include even larger responsibilities (it’s not really company-related, just a consulting thing we’re doing with a giant entity).

Clearly, the horizontal pivoting has gotten to the point where that aspect is becoming the majority of my practice, into something that I actually want to form the bulk of my career and the foundation of my 30s era. It’s happening at the same time as my desire to withdraw from the cycle of commercial production to focus on what I call studio/residency work aka sketching and making my webcomics.

So yeah, I’ve decided to formalise the other half of what I am already doing, since in this universe one can’t get a job in corporate/NGO/NPO art administration without a degree – despite years of experience and evidence of extremely specialised skills that don’t exist in a university course but are valuable on the ground (do they teach comics crowdfunding and webcomics marketing/production in tertiary?). And I do intend to go somewhat corporate, even if it’s as someone who runs a literary festival or artist residency. Because I actually find pleasure in doing all that admin juggling. I like helping artists pursue their practice. It engages a side of my brain that is understimulated since I stopped academia.

I went to the Orientation session on Thursday. It had been exactly 8 years since I last did an Orientation for school; I am no longer a wide-eyed doe so the entire time I was barrelling through the throngs of baby undergraduates and sitting through the talks with laser-focused practicality (putting aside the nice-sounding speeches for the actual hard facts of where stuff is and who to contact; though the speeches were quite thoughtful).

Anyway,

anyway…

This is a long-winded post to break the Jinx and say I am officially pursuing my Masters in Arts Management. Two years of this. Who knows what may happen?

Hopefully I will come out with better experiences this round, since this would be the first time that I chose a course not out of anxiety for the unknown, but because I very much know what I want based on experience actually working in industry.

[eijirousbestie]

“Answer the question.”

corporate au excerpt

im actually so out of the writing game I just wrote whatever words came to my mind first and let it go from there💀

this has no true beginning or ending im really just practicing writing again

btw whoever requested aizawa, this is 4 u

“That’s not what I asked you.”

You go silent, caught off guard by the sudden way he shut you down.

“Do you understand the material, or not?”

“No. Not well anyway. But then again I guess that’s why I’m here.” He gives you a look as if his patience is already wearing thin. He leans against the wall, arms crossed.

“Then learn it.” Huh?

“How am I supposed to learn it without being taught?”

“Figure it out. Use your resources. Nowadays you can find anything you want with a click of a button.”

“But it’s literally your job.”

“Not my job to coddle you. I don’t get paid for that. This is only a favor to spare you my time anyway.”

“You don’t need to be a prick about it. Whatever, I’ll just— I’ll figure it out.” You stand up from your seat on the couch and gather your things quickly. You make your way towards the door, gripping the handle to fling it open. That is until a heavy hand slams onto the door and forces it to close with a thud.

“Did I say we were done?” That annoying, drone-like voice is far too close to your ear.

“Shouta, get off the door.”

“Answer the question.”

Ominous silence fills the room for several moments. You rest your forehead against the door, closing your eyes and exhaling.

“No.”

“‘No’ what?” You can practically feel his eyes boring holes into the side of your head. Your grip on the doorknob tightens almost as if to rip it off completely.

“No, you didn’t say we were done.”

“For a team lead, you’re not very perceptive.”

Your head snaps to the side, eyeing him down harshly. “The hell is that supposed to mean?” His gaze is void of emotion, eyes sunken in from the lack of sleep throughout the years. Corporate really got to him.

“To put it simply, you forget yourself. You take in no knowledge that is presented to you and when you do need assistance you demand it as if any of us owe you anything. Not to mention you show no respect towards your superiors.”

“You’re seriously just making things up at this point. What, I fuck up one time and now I don’t deserve to have help at all? And what are you even going on about? You and I both know I’m incredibly respectful to everyone in our department.”

“Everyone?”

“Everyone.”

For the first time during the entire conversation, he cracks a smile. A smug, shit eating grin like he knows something you don’t.

“Alright. Then prove it.”

“Prove what?” If looks could kill, Shouta Aizawa would be a dead man from the way you eye him down.

He raises a brow, a bored expression resting on his scruffy face. “Prove to me that you truly display respect. Address me as your superior.”

Your eye twitches, frustration and anger simmering below the surface of your skin.

“What, call you by your job title? Okay then ‘Project Manager.’ Happy?” Something in the way he looks at you shifts.

“I really wish you’d try harder. I’d hate to see you lose your job over something so trivial.”

“Is that a threat?”

His gaze bores into yours. It’s heavy like a warning. He just stands there, staring.

“It’s a concern.” His tone is serious. It’s like there’s something he knows that you don’t, and that pisses you off.

You straighten up, tugging on the doorknob to shake his arm off of the door. It falls back to his side, his cold eyes squint at you. You crack open the door.

“I don’t need your ‘concern’. I’ll do my job, you do yours.” And with that, you storm out of his office. He watches as you leave, a single brow raised. He crosses his arms and exhales deeply, shaking his head before striding back to his wooden desk.

[argesta]

Academia, in my fanfiction (or at the very least, the ones I gravitate towards reading)? It’s more likely than you think!

In your last reply you mentioned chapter titles, so here I am to ask about the chapter titles!

And also how you decided who plays which roles. Ex. Santiago as Lestat’s oldest friend (from before he married Louis even) and member of his team.

I love this.... academia in my fanfiction more likely than you think... say that 😩

I’ll answer your second question first because it’s so, so good.

When adapting canon to an AU, what I’m interested in is the dynamic capture of a character over the static one. So by static, I mean a 1:1 parity with the character, a modern version of their job, direct translation of their personality, social status, identity etc. Dynamic essence is how they impact other characters + overall context.

To take Santiago - because he's this circus ringmaster in canon S2, this satyr, lurid spotlight figure, I could’ve easily just made him a tabloid guy, go the TMZ route. But that wouldn’t really convey what I needed him for - he’d just be a cameo.

Given that in canon he has such a fraught relationship with both Armand and Lestat - need but rivalry but resentment - I wanted to translate that above all else. And there is no better framing device for this dependency than to have him be this older, grizzled spin-doctor that has been working for “the cause” since forever, knows enough dirt to bury both Lestat and Armand, but does not have the resources to take on any of them individually. Armand himself is a new upstart that technically should be Santiago's subordinate, but in PV he comes with his own capital (the name and power and connections via Marius “eugh” de Romanus at his back).

To me, Santiago’s main draw in all his canon appearances is the fact that his power is so uncertain for all its apparent flashiness. His control is predicated on so many elements which lay behind the curtain (LITERALLY) and which we do not see until the finale.

We think he is calling the shots, but then: oh. You take a closer look and he’s no ringmaster or eminence gris, he’s just the town crier. There is no vertiable eminence gris in either IWTV canon or PV, because they’re all defanged. They are consequences of history and fatherhood, especially if you compare them to figures such as Magnus and Marius - these old men still moving pieces on the board from beyond the grave and/or before the start of the story.

Anyway, am I unnecessary and unserious for thinking this in-depth about it? Absolutely. Is this some artistic credo that I think all AU/fic writers should do? Definitely not.

It’s just the by-product of me outlining this AU-verse in 6 PoVs so far (Lestat, Louis, Claudia, Armand, Daniel, Nicki) so it’s inevitable that the world becomes part of the story. I’d love to get a chance to tell the events in PV from other characters’ point of view, or at least write more fic set in the same PV universe, so I just think of it as doing the planning in advance because I know it’ll come in handy later.

Chapter titles meta under the cut <3 sorry mutuals :’)

The chapter titles are all film techniques! Names come from either cinematography study (frame camera angle perspective etc.) or editing and transitional devices (montage, scene cutting and so on). They are mostly made for motion picture, but some are of course also used in other contexts like news live reporting social media etc. (though I do believe sm apps like CapCut come with their own name for stuff or whatever - I avoid platforming TikTok until it pays me).

I like taking this angle with all present & future chapters because it’s a clin to how the characters are mediating (and meditatizing) their experience through these like - artifacts and artifices.

I.e. TWO-SHOT being a wide-frame, single-take conversation between two people, with almost no one else (certainly #norealpeopleinvolved) entering or leaving the shot until the scene ends. CROSS-CUT being... well, to take it from the definition:

Cross-cutting is an editing technique most often used in films to establish action occurring at the same time, and often in the same place (...) can also be used for characters in a film with the same goals but different ways of achieving them. Cross-cutting is often used during phone-conversation sequences so that viewers see both characters' facial expressions in response to what is said.

Sometimes it's genuine - TWO SHOT really is just a two-shot, sometimes it's an irony/play on purpose/subversion, like SPLIT SCREEN showing on one level Louis-Claudia conversing on a literal screen, the proverbial split between Louis/Lestat, and the disturbing, growing similarity between Lestat/Armand as a common front (as perceived by Louis; being the split image of someone else, etc.)

Certainly I don’t need to oversell the point of why the performativity of editing and montage fits the universe these miserable girls are living in, or why the chapters are defined and sectioned through the techniques it would take to adapt them to screen. (Very clear that none of these characters can define their life without an audience, they’re so consumed with the self-narrative that they forget they are not only participating in it, but fully have the power to change it).

[shirohige-pirates]

Just Like Fire

CisFem Reader x Portgas D. Ace

CW: angst, language, erotic, violence, serial killer, stalking, poisoning, over-bearing controlling parents, attempted forced marriage, possible dub-con, Munchausen by proxy (aka Factitious Disorder), wildly cute and fluffy despite the warnings. 18+ only

Summary: You're Sabo's biological sister in this AU. After college you moved in with your dear brother and his two sworn brothers in order to avoid going back home. You and Sabo despise your family equally.

Chapter 15: First

“No, that makes sense. Oh, it’s fine Mr. Bon-chan, I promise, I’ll be okay. Just keep me posted.” You hang up the phone, and sigh.

It will take months for the office building to be rebuilt, and the current belief is that it will have to be fully demolished and rebuilt entirely. Mr. Bon-chan’s firm is looking for temporary space as fast as they can, but it will likely be another week at least before everyone can return to work. There’s a chance some people will have to – or be able to – work remotely, but for right now there’s a small army of executives working at Mr. Bon’s home keeping everything afloat.

Frankly, you’re too new to be much help, and you were also the only person in the firm to be trapped in the building. A few people on other floors weren’t so lucky, in the end seven people died because they couldn’t evacuate, and dozens more were hospitalized from smoke inhalation.

You felt a little guilty that you had survived, but Sabo said that several other people had been successfully rescued by the fire department, not just you.

“How long?” Ace questions, cleaning up the dishes from the morning’s breakfast.

“Months for the office to be rebuilt, but Mr. Bon-chan says that they’re trying to find a temporary location in the meantime.” You say with a sigh.

“Chin up, Bon-chan’s resourceful, you’ll be back to work in no time.” He says with a smile.

“And you? It’s okay that you’re here?” You question.

“Oh yeah. I worked everything out at the station once we got you admitted.” He assures you, putting the last of the dishes up to dry. “We’re supposed to take time off when we enter a building anyway. I mean, I usually don’t – what’s fire going to do to me? But, I can take advantage of the procedure this time, so, sure.”

Ace leans up against the sinks, looking at you from across the breakfast bar. “Besides, we wanted to talk.” He lets the idea hang in the air for a moment. “Only if you’re up for it. You’ve been going through a lot the last few-.”

“I am.” You cut him off. You can’t look at him, but you’re smiling. “I’ve spent my whole life thinking every moment was precious… and I guess it still is, even if I’m not legitimately sick, but if I wait until nothing is happening, then, well, nothing will happen.”

Ace considers it for a moment and then smiles. “Good point.” He pauses. “It’s not nighttime, but we can still talk outside.”

You nod. You never got to spend much time outside in the first place, and it was lovely outside.

“Were you going to show me your fire Monday night?” You question, referring to the original plan that had been derailed by the fire.

“Yeah,” Ace admits, pulling the patio door open and letting you walk by. “I know some of what you and Sabo went through as kids, I was worried you would be afraid of it.”

“… What my parents did isn’t the fault of anything they used to do it.” You say after a moment. “Which isn’t always enough to make it easier, but only Sabo was, um, scarred that way.”

“Ahhhhh, heck. Sorry, we came out here to talk, but not about this. My bad.” Ace says with a bit of a sigh. “Dredging up old stuff isn’t going to get us anywhere.”

“Indeed. The past isn’t what we need to talk about anyway.” You agree, turning toward him and taking a couple steps backward.

“Yeah… Are you sure about this?” He asks, pulling his hat up and putting it on.

“Sure about… talking?”

Ace suddenly looks unsure. “… Dating. Me.”

You turn away and start walking further into the backyard. “I suppose that’s what we’re going to talk about, isn’t it?”

“So I thought.” Ace says. You can hear a grin in his voice as he follows after you.

“Should I be unsure?” You question, looking over your shoulder before coming to a stop by the fire pit.

“I mean… I’m, uh…” Ace clicks his tongue. “My dad’s kinda… was kind of notorious.”

“Mine too.” You say with a small smile. “They’re not us.” You assert, sitting down on the log. “You’re not going to hold my father’s actions against me, are you?”

“No, I wouldn’t.”

“Then why should I care about your father’s actions?” You prompt, straddling the log as Ace does the same beside you. Unlike the night spent camping, you’re facing each other instead of simply sitting side by side.

“It’s… been a problem for people before.” Ace admits, concern on his face. “Did Sabo tell you?”

“About your dad?” You shake your head. “Sabo didn’t even tell me what you and Luffy could do. Was your father a murderer?”

Ace shakes his head.

“Did he keep and abuse slaves?”

He shakes his head again.

“Did he beat and scar children?”

“No, he… he didn’t do any of that as far as I know.”

You lean down to catch Ace’s gaze and smile. “Then, to me, he’s already a preferable father. But even if he had been awful, you are not.”

You straighten back up and can see the pink in Ace’s face, despite the coverage his hat offered.

“Hmm… was he Roger?” You question, and you see Ace flinch. “Sorry. It really was a lucky guess.”

“How so?”

“Gol D. Roger is infamous. Enough so that your average person has a concept of him that may or may not be correct.” You explain. “For people to hold it against you, and since you’re not a noble, it would have had to have been someone infamous. You’re too young for Xebec to have been your dad, and you’re not actually blood related to Luffy, which means your father couldn’t be Dragon.

“Process of elimination.”

“How’d you know about Luffy’s dad?”

“I sorted that out before I even moved in. Garp’s a hero of the people, but his son is practically struck from all records. Monkey D. Garp, Monkey D. Dragon, Monkey D. Luffy.” You say. “If it was meant to be a secret, it’s a poorly kept one.”

“It might not be a common surname, but it’s not just them.” Ace counters.

“You’re not wrong, but I’m not wrong either.” You insist with a smile. “Luffy is chaos incarnate, there’s no way he’s not related to such big names.”

Ace laughs. “He is, that’s true.”

“I could be cursed.” You say after a moment, and Ace nods.

“You could.”

You scoot a little closer to him. “It doesn’t matter that you are.”

“… I know.” Ace looks over at you and gives you a crooked smile. “I knew… when you called my fire pretty.” He admits. “Pretty though? Of all words?”

You smile. “Cute?”

“Handsome?” Ace tries to prompt.

“I mean, you are, but your fla-.” You freeze, and then cover your face with your hands.

You hear Ace scoot closer to you. “Got you.” He says softly.

“That was cheap.” You grump from behind your fingers.

“Hardly. Now, if I had tricked you into calling me sexy,” he muses, letting the idea hang in the air.

“It’s not a trick when you are.” You say, parting your fingers and looking at him from behind your hands. His face is pink, but he’s smiling back at you.

“Can I come closer?” He questions.

“Yeah.”

“Pardon me then.” He says, grabbing your legs and putting them over his thighs as he scoots closer. He has one hand against the back of your waist, your covered face inches from his chest. The new position pulls a quiet squeak from you, but you don’t make a move to leave.

“Can I hug you?” He questions, his voice nearly a whisper.

You nod, moving your hands away from your face and putting them around his waist as the two of you lean into one another. You rest your head on his chest, and felt his cheek nuzzle against your head as his hands wrapped around you.

“My flames,” he says softly, nearly speaking into your hair. “Are nothing compared to how beautiful you are.”

“… That’s cheating.” You mumble. You’re glad you don’t combust when you’re embarrassed like Ace does, but you’re sure he can feel the heat radiating off of you at this point.

“Cheating would be telling you, how the first time you laughed, I thought I was so screwed. Or that when you were pressed against me when we destroyed those books, I was scrambling to keep my composure. That I was so scared you only tolerated cursed, and you wouldn’t ever truly see me.” Ace’s hug tightens, and your mind scrambles on the spot. “You don’t even have to do anything, and I feel like I’m getting pulled in a hundred directions at once. I… it’s a little scary, so I’m sorry for saying so, but I want to burn your mom to ashes for what she’s done to you.”

You tighten your hug and scoot a little closer. “You don’t scare me.”

“Heh, haaa… ahh, I might not scare you, but you’re kind of scary.” Ace admits. He breaks the hug, wiggling away a little. He puts his hat on your head, covering your view with it.

“I’m not scary!” You protest with a laugh, bringing the hat up and seeing him sitting properly on the log, one leg crossed over the other. The red on his face, and his position is enough for you to realize what happened, and you feel your own face heat up. “… Sorry.”

Ace gives you a wide grin, pulling his hat down over your eyes again. “It’s okay.”

You sit cross-legged on the log, facing him with a smile as you tip the hat back up a little. It’s a bit too big for you, and you have to tilt it back to keep it on without it falling forward, but you don’t take it off. You decide to distract yourself with the stampede strap, and the ornament on it.

“It’s… a very nice hat.” You say absently.

“Mm.” Ace looks over at you and smiles. “I’ve had it since I was a kid. Well, fourteen, but still.”

“You’ve taken exceptional care of it, then.” You run your fingers over the skull and horn motif.

“The lady who looked after Luffy and I, helped me make it. She’s an amazing leather worker.” Ace explains. “Otherwise, I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t have lasted this long no matter how well I took care of it. Marco, and the guys at the station, made the necklace to go with it.” He says, preemptively answering your next question, as he lifts the crimson red beaded necklace he usually wears.

“Such nice gifts from your nakama.” You muse softly. “I hope I can gift you something suitable at some point as well.”

You see flames flicker over Ace and celebrate internally. It was, perhaps, a little cruel of you, but it was so cute, and you had to admit you were trying to make him do that.

“You’re cheating again.” He grumbles.

“Intentionally.” You admit with a smile.

Ace grunts and ruffles the hat against your hair a little. “So… what now?”

Biting your lower lip a little, you grin deviously. “Someone promised me a better first date.”

“Was Ichiji your first date?” Ace asks. “Like, I mean, first ever?”

You crinkle your nose. “That doesn’t count.” You pout. “I didn’t… choose him.”

There’s a moment’s pause before Ace leans toward you slowly. He reaches out and brushes his fingers over yours a little before he takes your hand gently. You’re certain if you were still hooked up to the heart monitor, the alarms would be going off already.

Warm, calloused fingers, slide over the soft skin of your palm as he brings your hand to his face.

“It would be my pleasure, (Y/N), to take you on your first date.” He kisses your hand softly, grinning deviously at you as he straightens up.

“Che… Cheater!” You accuse, pulling the hat over your face and hiding behind it.

“Ruffian.” He corrects, causing you to both laugh.

[dynamic-k]

are you pro palestine?

The answer to that question is complicated, as I see wrongs on both Israeli and Palestinian sides.

Or rather, Hamas, with the Palestinians being taken advantage of. There is actual evidence that exists --highly suppressed and not believed evidence, but still evidence-- pointing toward Hamas sucking up the resources and supplies that helpful people are attempting to send to the Palestinians. Those who are suffering by being caught in the crossfire of all the chaos, are not always receiving the things we send, no thanks to Gaza, and that is one of the many reasons I have not yet invested in supporting or sending things to either side. I am not able to do much anyway.

I'm not exactly willing to share all the nuances of my reasoning either, or at least not until people are less aggressive toward others for not sharing the same opinion or "failing to see the obvious right and wrongs" or "supporting the wrong side", and those that are trying to push incorrect information onto Israel to make them look really bad publicly.

I see wrong on both sides. I do.

Honestly, I'm closer to being a neutral party or not involved at all, than I am being on one or the other.

I do indeed find it VERY sad and heartwrenching what is currently going on in Palestine. War is not a pretty sight in the slightest.

I am not here to make excuses for Israel, but I am going to say that Hamas has LIED to the public. A misfired Palestinian Islamic Jihad (PIJ) rocket actually caused the deadly blast in that Gaza hospital, the same one that Hamas told everyone that Israel was responsible for.

Hamas got to the social media outlets first, and with that accusation on repeat, most of everyone was swayed toward that belief first and foremost.

In fact: I would love to recommend this here article for better-worded information, that I feel a LOT more people should know about.

In conclusion, I would say I'm pro peace. I want the fighting to stop, even though I know such a wish is impossible right now. The closest we'll get to peace is a pause button.

It's not hopeless, however.

I believe in Jesus Christ, and I know there will be a day of true peace.

[creator-indy]

Either all of the questions (I like them all shghsds) or whichever ones you like for Sheila (or anyone else if someone asked about her first) in the oc interview ask game?

Most of these are gonna be answered by Sheila and by me btw

1. Describe your appearance. What do people notice first about you? Are there any aspects of your appearance that you hide from others?

I am a modified shyster model the only aesthetic differences i have from other shysters are my longer hair and my need for glasses

She also has a beauty mark on her right cheek

2. Describe your personality. What are people's first impressions of you Are there parts of your personality that they keep hidden? How hard is it for others to get to know you?

Is this honestly relevant information for an annual interview?

This is where I come in

I would describe her as a quiet introvert but with a dry sarcastic edge

3. What is your occupation? (job/school/duties/etc.) Do you enjoy it? What would be your ideal occupation?

I’m currently employed at cogs inc where i work as a supervisor for a regional manager who’s been quite bothersome for my boss as of late as for my enjoyment of said job…it pays so that’s about as much enjoyment I’m going to get out of it (come on Sheila that’s a lie)

As for my ideal occupation… I would like to work as a criminal prosecutor

4. What do you do for fun? Do you have any hobbies or special interests? Are there any activities you’d like to try but don't have enough time/resources for?

I prefer to read in the lawfices with what Little spare time I’m given and there’s… something I would like to try but…it’s not relevant to my work so I’d rather not answer

she has a tiny crush someone she works with~

5. Where do you live? Do you like it there? How do you furnish/decorate your personal space?

I live in an apartment complex for lawbots just outside the coal and Ice district and It’s furnished as needed im not home very much anyway

6. What is your family situation like? Which family members (if any) are you closest to, and which ones do you have conflict with?

I’m an only child and my parents are alright I speak with them every once in a while

7. Who are the most important people in your life? Do you have any close friends? Are you in love with anyone? Do you have any enemies?

I think this is irrelevant for an interview to ask

Okay her parents I guess are important but she ain’t that close to them nor doesn’t she have any friends or enemies she does have some feelings towards a certain witch hunter but she is denying it HARD

8. What are your best skills and virtues? Did these come naturally to you or did you have to work hard to achieve them?

I’m quite knowledgeable in criminal law despite being a corporate lawyer and yes I’ve studied long and hard with what little spare time I’m given

9. What are your worst flaws and weak points? Are you working to overcome their flaws, or do you let them fester? Is there anyone you rely on for help with their weak points?

…i dont have any weak points

She has anxiety when it comes to crowds and shes to married to her work to the point where she sees anything outside of suit life as Irrelevant

10. What are your goals? Do they set long term goals for youself or do you prefer to live in the moment?

I want to pursue a career in criminal law and prosecutor at some point but unfortunately law school isn’t affordable as of now which is why i applied here so i can save up for it and no I don’t have enough time to “live in the moment” as you put it

[blackhakumen]

Mini Fanfic #1077: Bartending with Uncle Rodin (Persona 5 x Bayonetta x SSBU)

2:34 p.m. at the Gates of Hell Bar.......

Ren: (Standing Behind the Bar With a Confident Smirk on his Face) Gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to my first and lastest creation....(Presents Two Small Glasses of Red Colored Drinks) Passionate Crimson Flaré~

Enzo: (Amazed at the Drink In Front of Him) Ooooooooh.....

Rodin: (Crosses his Arms as He Examines his Drink Closer) The name could use a little more work. But the drink itself does look promising. I wonder.....

Enzo and Rodin takes a sip of their respective drinks. It wasn't long for the duo to take a liking to them in question.

Enzo: (Turns to His Boss Next to Him) Holy shit, Boss. This creation of his taste fucking phenomenal!

Rodin: Wouldn't go that far. (Begins to Nod as his Taste Buds Starts Kicking in a Bit) ('Mm') But this is pretty delectable. (Turns to Ren in Front of Him) Not bad, kid.

Ren: (Smiles Proudly) Thanks! I wasn't kidding when I said this was my first time creating something like this, but I'm really glad the Bardtending Class is paying off somewhat.

Rodin: That's good and all, but what exactly makes you wanna take up this job in the first place?

Enzo: Yeah, not that we don't want ya here obviously, but you seem like the kinda fellow who would be more interested in the undercover business if anything.

Ren: Funny you mentioned that tidbit. I was planning on becoming one at one point, but I thought about all the times the legal system screwed me over in the past. So I decided not to go through with it in the end. 'Sure Makoto can do a better undercover agent than I ever could anyways.

Enzo: (Raised an Eyebrow in Confusion) Makoto who now?

Ren: Makoto Niijima. (Puts on a Cheeky Grin on his Face) My one and only Queen~ (Shows his Uncles a Picture of him and his Girlfriend Together on his Phone) We started dating back in high school and been a romantic team ever since.

Enzo: (Starts Holding his Chin and Nodding With a Grin of his Own) Aha!~ That girl looks like a real keeper, I'll tell ya what.

Rodin: She must be if you call her Queen.

Ren: ('Sighs Dreamingly') Oh you have no idea.....She's smart, resourceful, always does her best to lookout for others, and can definitely kick my ass anyday of the week~

Enzo: (Let's Out Heartdy Laugh) Hahaaa!~ Girl who can kick your ass, huh? I never expected any less from one of my nephews!~

Rodin: (Rolls his Eyes) They're OUR nephews, moron. And of course you would be into that dominance shit. Your own wife been kicking your fatass since the day you first met her.

Enzo: (Shrugs Casually) True. I may be the resident punching bag in the relationship, but it's still leagues better than being coped up in a bar all day and night being single, bald, and moody-(Quickly Notice his Boss Glaring at Him Before Sweating Bullets) I-I don't mean you, of course, boss! I mean, you're bald too, b-b-but like in a more sophisticated way in, ya know? A-And who could ever resist a bald man owning a bar, am i right? (Chuckles Very Awkwardly)

'Silence'

Enzo: (Clicks his Tongue Briefly) You know, I JUST remembered....I had an assignment or two I had get done by the end if the day, you know the one with mafia business and whatnot? (Slowly Starts Getting Up From his Table and Points at the Door Far Behind him) Yeah, I should....go out there and get my lazy-ass started already. (Turns Back to Ren With a Smile as He Gives him a Handshake) But hey! It was nice to finally have the opportunity to meet you, Renny Boy. I don't know why your mothers didn't introduce you to us sooner, but that's neither here nor there. Stay safe and try not to work your ass off to death, alright? Business here been going slow here for God knows how long and I doubt the boss man is gonna do anything to make more interesti-

Enzo turns back to see Rodin still glaring at him.

Enzo: I-I'mma gonna....head out now.....(Starts Walking Backwards Before Turning Around and Sprinting his Way Towards the Exit)

Ren: (Waves Goodbye to Enzo) It was nice to meet you. Uncle Enzo!

Rodin: Try not to trip your ass on the way out!

Enzo: (Turbs Back to the Duo on a Far Enough) Huh? WoahwoahwoahWOAH!-

The loud sound of trash cans falling and cats yelling cam be heard as Enzo trips outside.

Enzo: ('Groans in the Distance') Ah gee....What a fucking start to the day......

Ren: Hm. (Starts Nodding Before Smiling a Bit) He seems pretty cool.

Rodin: Who? Enzo? ('Tch') Please. (Takes a Cigar From Out his Coat Pocket and Uses his Finger to Light It Up) That fool's more of constant headache if anything....(Starts Smoking From his Cigar Before Exhaling it With a Sigh) But I'm glad you're taking a liking to us at least. You seem like a nice kid, or rather young adult.

Ren: Thanks. I'm glad I have opportunity to meet you two as I am happy to be here. I'll do everything I can not to get in your all that much.

Rodin: I wouldn't worry too much about that if I were you. Just keep doing what you've been doing and everything can go smoothly from there. (Points at Ren) Also, don't get too experimental on the drink, ya hear? Their bitter taste is a whole lot stronger than it looks and I don't wanna deal spent an hour or two trying get these drunk fucks out of my bar.

Ren: (Simply Nodded at the Request) Right.

A few minutes has passed by and there wasn't any customers insight, which for Rodin, is a blessing in most disguised figure. As Ren finishing up cleaning the used glasses for today, a thought suddenly occurred in his mind as he speaks.

Ren: Hey, Uncle Rodin, can I ask you something?

Rodin: (Looks Up at Ren With a Magazine in his Habd) Yeah, shoot.

Ren: I....know this might not be my business or anything, but.....Is it true that you and our goddess mom had bad history with one another at one point?

Rodin: Me & Palutena? (Sighs Heavily at the Particular Memory) Yeah.......something like that. I mean, I'm indifferent towards her nowadays, but she still despise me with every fiber in her flesh abd bones.

Ren: Really.

Rodin: Damn right. And it all started wayyy back when I was just your average, run of a mill Angel. (Let's Out a Chuckle) Well, actually, I wouldn't go that far. I was actually pretty well respected for the most part, taking charge of the creation and half of Paradiso's population and whatnot. The women wanted to fuck me and the men would write an entire essay why they wanna be me. That was, until the day I got fed up with the job and higher ups to the point I rebelled on the system entirely and boy, let me tell you that they were NOT happy about that at all.

Ren: Not even mom?

Rodin: ESPECIALLY your mother. You see, she never admits this to anyone, but back then, your mother was a fan of mines, said my contribution inspired her in someway. So once she found out about my insurgency that day, she teleported her way to the battlefield and tried to kill me herself.

Ren: (Eyes Widened in Genuine Shock) You're kidding.......

Rodin: It's true. That woman did everything in her power to end my existence one way or another. But I'll say this much: as loud and obnoxiously preachy as she was....(Smirks a Bit) She's actually one the few worthy adversaries I had in a real long time.

Ren: So she hated you for that long, didn't she?

Rodin: ('Heh') "Hated"? Boy, she still hates my guts even when her and your momma started dating. But I suppose as long as she keep treating y'all with the respect and care, I shouldn't have any reasons to worry. (Pulls Down his Glasses as He Raises his Eyebrow at Ren) You do like having her around as your Goddess Mom or whatever, right?

Ren: (Happily Nodded) Yeah, how could not? She and Witch Mom went out of their way to adopt and raise me as their own. (Frowns a Bit) Which is more than I can say about my actual parents......

Rodin: You had a shitty home life?

Ren: ('Sigh') Somewhat....It was mostly strict if anything. It wasn't long until I was framed for a crime I didn't commit that they moved me away to Shiyuba, labeled me as a disgrace to the family's name, and disowned me altogether. But as sucky as that was....(Starts Smiling a Little) The move did help me start my life over and meet the people I've grown attached to over the recent years. So there's that at least.

Rodin: (Smiles Back at Ren With a Simple Nod) Good, good. The world we live in is filled with cruelty and disaster, but It's nice to see some folks out there finding a better outlook and living the best life for themselves, away from their past sufferings.

'DOOR KOCKED OPENS'

????: HEEEEEEERE'S HADES!

Rodin: (Sighs While Rolling his Eyes at a Familiar Face) Speaking of disasters......

Ren: 'Sup Hades. What brings you here?

Hades: Ohh nothing too grand. (Makes his Way inside the Bar) Just checking up on how my nephew is doing on his first day as a bartender.

Rodin: (Turns to Ren) Y'all appointed this fool as your uncle?

Ren: Not really. He declared himself as one a while back. (Leans in and Whispers into Rodin's Ear) He's not even close being the best uncle in the entire Smash Family.

Hades: (Glares at his Self Proclaimed Nephew) Hey, my ears aren't broken, I heard that! (Crosses his Arms Together) And I'll have you know that have set a good enough example for each of you ungrateful brats as a parental figure.

Ren: (Gives Hades a Deadpinned Look on his Face) Really? Then why did showed Pitto that one scene from Toyoko Tribe last year on the first day of October?

Rodin: Wait. You mean one with that big lipped fucker and-

Ren: Yeeeup. And let's not forget the time you made him watch three episodes of Boku no Pico a year or two earlier just for shits and giggles.

Rodin slowly turns his head back towards Hades with a menacing glare on his face.

Rodin: What in the everlasting hell is wrong with you?

Hades: ('SIghs in Defeat') Look, I was bored at each of those times alright!? I didn't think they would actually sacred him THAT badly.......

Ren: Yeah, well they did. (Chuckles Lightly) And honestly, you deserved every beating that came your way after that. (Whispers into Rodin's Ear Again While Snickering) He got whopped by goddess mom AND Pitto's girlfriends.

Rodin: (Forms a Conniving Looking Smirk on his Face) You don't say?

Hades: Hey, they only beaten me by surprise! I can handle all three of them easily in a rematch, Palutena especially!

Ren: Really. So if I were to call her right now and ask her to come over here, you'd still fight her?

Hades: Yeeeup! (Crosses his Arms Again) Your Best Uncle in the Mutliverse Hades us not afraid of anyone. Not even all your mothers.

Ren; No one ever calls you that. (Shrugs) But hey, it's your funeral.

Ren takes his phone out of his pants pocket and begins his call. He waits for a few seconds for the beeps to go off until the words "Hello?" from a feminine voice finally reach into his eardrums.

Ren: Hey, mom, how's its going?

Rodin: (Turns to Hades) You're about to enter a word of eternal pain, you know that?

Hades: (Puts on a Cocky Smirk on his Face as He Scoffs at Rodin) Oh please, like she would ever step foot on this bar alone. She still hates you, remember?

Ren: What's that? You said you're coming over right away to beat him up!?

Hades' sudden begins to widens as he mentally hears the sound of broken glass ringing in his ears and a hint of fear slowly rears it's ugly head as shown in his facial expression.

Ren: And you don't care if you have step foot in Uncle Rodin's bar to do so!?

Rodin: (Went Back to Smirking at Hades) You were saying?

Hades: (Glares at Ren) Ren, what the hell did you tell your mother!?

Ren: Ohhh nothing too major~ Just the fact that I told her that you said that she's too much of a wuss to fight you again and you could vaporize her easily.

Hades: (Eyes Widened in Complete Shock) VAPORIZ- Ren Amimaya, you know DAMN well I never said anything about vaporizing her bitch ass!

Ren: (Holds a Finger Up at Hades as He Continues His Phone Call With Palutena) .....Yeah, you heard that too, right? He just called you the B word.

Hades: (Angrily Grits his Teeth While Whispering to Ren) STOP TWISTING MY WORDS AROUND, BOY!- (Quickly Pauses Himself Before Taking a Deep Breath to Calm Down) You know what? It's fine, Hades. This is just an elaborate prank to fuck with me us all. Nothing more.

Ren: Hey, Hades, someone would like to have a word with you.

Ren holds up his phone and pits it on speaker mode as the caller in the other line begins to speak.

Palutena: HADES, YOU FUCKING PIECE OF FILITH! I'M COMING OVER THERE TO KICK YOUR SORRY ASS RIGHT NOW AND- (Continues Ranting and Screaming on the Other Line

Hades: (Finally Scared Shitless) Fuck this, I'm not ready to die again yet! Hades out!

And with that Hades finally disappears in the instantaneous speed of darkness much to Ren's satisfaction.

Ren: (Turns Speaker Mode Off and Put the Phone Back in his Ear) Don't waste your time coming over here, mom. He chickened out and left......Uh-huh.....Yep......('Sigh') Yes, I know. I shouldn't call you during work hours. This was just too funny of an opportunity to pass up, you know?.....Yeah......Alright, I'll bring you and Witch Mom something back once I get off.....Love you too. See ya.

Call Ends

Ren: (Turns to Rodin) Hey, you don't mind if I take some of your bags of Hellish Beef Jerky with me back home, do you? It'll only be for an evening.

Rodin: Knock yourself out (Puts on a Proud Smirk on his Face) You deserve it after scaring Hades' dumbass out of our establishment. 'Truly grateful for your service here today so far, boy.

Ren: (Smiles Softly) Thanks. I'm really glad to be here.

@keyenuta

@mariah2014

@cyber-wildcat

@caleb13frede

@bestpony666

@princekirijo

[plural-swag-competition]

hi, i'm a singlet (i....think, anyway. i am not 100% sure on that honestly) and i think this competition is super cool and awesome! /gen! but since i want to make sure i'm using respectful language when referring to the contestants (and honestly it would be helpful for my own questioning as well since.... i've never really asked myself if i'm not a singlet), i was wondering if anyone here might have any trusted resources to learn more about plurality? i just want to make sure i'm learning from sources that the community is comfortable with!!

standard disclaimer, not your job to educate people on your identity etc., especially not on a for fun blog like this one, but even just a common tag that i could look through would help! either way thank you so much for your time and for running the competition!!

Honestly, even knowing the term "singlet" is more than we knew when we first started questioning.

We generally point towards more than one for starters. Thanks for putting in the effort to make sure you're being respectful!

[hardcolorfest]

✨️ AM I PLURAL? ✨️

Please help me, I have gone back and forth on this for years, at least 10 years which is literally like a third of my life so far!

Please, I am desprate for ANY outside views and opinions, I feel like I need others to read my experience and help me understand why I keep on getting into this cycle of "this is plural/no actually its not."

EDIT: this is LONG and I ran out of energy near the end so the writing gets really sloppy so I added a timeline of events up top. I'm so sorry, this ended up turning into more of a vent towards the end, but if anyone wants to read my life story and give me... uhhh........ feedback? I'm sorry words hard now I'm so tired.

I'm getting tired of the doubting and accepting cycle, the "is this normal and I'm just attributing it to a plural thing" floating around in my head constantly. I'm going to try and keep this short, but I'll need to lay everything out so anyone can get a full picture of what I'm/We're working with.

First of all, sorry this is posted on a random empty blog with a title and description totally unrelated. I was going to use this blog for something else but the crisis in my/our identity keeps getting in the way of doing much of anything solid for the last like year now. That's how bad this has gotten now, I hardly feel like a real person anymore and I don't know what to do. Secondly I'm really sorry if there are typos or anything like that. Sometimes my phone autocorrects something and I won't notice that it's changed it to something really weird, like it sometimes switches "I" to "you" and so on for like literally no reason so idk.

Now on to the meat.

🌲

The timeline so far goes > 2012 discover systems > understand I'm not one even though I'd like to be > follow and watch systems online while reading any resource or information posts > learn about tulpas > "make" first tulpa > seemingly gains sentience and gets angry > leaves > 2016 reset > 2016 does not care about being a system > fuzzy memory bullshit here, none of it has to do with this posts topic > 2019 reset > mostly uninterested in being plural > in 2020, 2019 me decides to try make a tulpa again > goes surprisingly well, much faster than last time (which I barely remember at this time) > he eventually talks without my focused effort > I doubt his existence being real > he gets angry, we argue for weeks > eventually he disappears, vaguely sometimes feel like he's "checking in on me" > the 2021 fuckery (more trauma) > homeless and feeling alone > now have stable housing > vaguely refer to self as plural and make a pk and list out like 6 headmates including yourself as one and the past tulpas > goes well and smoothly for a while, everyone's pretty happy despite acknowledging past trauma and working on that together > 2023 reset happens > make new accounts again and feel upset about all these past events > is happy and having a lot of fun all year > occasionally still feels like the logged pk headmates are vaguely around but can't really talk to them much anymore > sometimes fully switches out anyway but not too long > remembers these resets happened before and makes posts to 2019's freinds > mixed reception and lots of questions, 2023 gets overwhelmed and never answers back > now I feel guilty

✨️ I will now explain in more detail.

So for the last 10 years, probably a little longer by like a year or two but I can't be precise, I've known about plurality, DID, tulpas and other concepts like this. I've also been aware of kins/therians/otherkin/fictionkin and so on and related concepts for much longer, 20 years or so, give or take a year or two again. I've never been very good at role-playing, and I struggled to "play" anyone but myself.

Since learning about systems, I took an interest in them. In the concept of being able to step back and let someone else take control. The idea was extremely appealing. I've been traumatized from a childhood of neglect and abuse, and life was starting to get to the point it was wearing me down to nothing. I wanted to take a break, to "die but not die" as I had put it back then. To "go away" with little financial consiquence and come back when I felt recharged. I wasn't really sure how I felt about sharing my life, but was willing to if it meant I could sometimes take a break. Gladly.

So I did a lot of research, quietly reading and observing people online. Maybe it was a little creepy, like watching a fandom from afar and learning what the show they liked was about secondhand through them. I think after I learned about how DID presents, I decided it wasn't really how I was at all and concluded for sure I was not and never could be a system since I did not talk to voices in my head, loose control of my body, nor have severe trauma (to me at the time, this is definitely not the case) and therefore I was not a system. I still watched from afar though.

I think I learned about tulpas around then. I knew I wasn't ever going to have DID due to my conclusions at the time, so I guess I could emulate a headmate until my brain thought it was real. And I still do think you can do this, don't get me wrong, I am fascinated by the human mind and how we process things and the nature of consciousness from a scientific level. I don't think its too far fetched for our brains to be able to do this, genuinely, even if I choose weird ways to describe it.

Anyway, I did try to make a tulpa a few times, maybe twice honestly, but each of them eventually got angry with me once they got to the point they could talk freely. The anger was about me doubting their existence after they were no longer being consciously forced and could do things without my input. Each time, after a little bit of arguing for weeks, they would disappear and I would be left feeling alone in scilence and upset at the fact that I ultimately caused them to leave me.

I have, in the past, "reset" myself somehow. I don't think I did it intentionally, I'm not even sure if there's a common trigger. It's happened a few times. It's happened in the past but I have no real memory of them except for vague feelings and fuzzy memories that feel like I'm seeing someone else's life. However I do remember more about the last two times than any other times.

The first of these was around 2016 I think, and that version of "me" now feels like a complete seprate being who has their own name, likes and dislikes, interests and hobbies, spiritual and political beliefs, and vision of themselves in terms of looks and self-concept. And then in 2019 that version of "me" got packed away into the back of my mind and suddenly I was someone else.

This 2019 "me" had some leftover interests, and of course had any knowledge nessicary to still life the continuous life that having a body and a presence requires, like knowledge of family and friends, jobs and schedules, and so on. It felt like taking over someone else's life, but none of their stuff is really yours. Their freinds suddenly feel like strangers, or at best acquaintances you could say "hello" to but really couldn't hold a conversation with anymore. Even interests and hobbies that carried over were either dampened feeling or the focus of that interest/hobby changed significantly enough that it wasn't really expressed in the same ways. 2019 "me" enjoyed art and drawing with a lot of the same enthusiasm that 2016 did, but with less of a focus on furry and more of a focus on anime, and in particular diving into the world of en ess eff double-yew, which 2016 was not interested in the least but 2019 was vigorously passionate about lol

The further back in versions of "me" we go, the fuzzier it gets. But the general feeling is the same. You wake up in a room with someone else's clothes, books, toys and collections and you have to fight yourself to not immediately throw them all out. You know that would just make them sad. And they do kind of pop back in, although usually only for a short time, a few hours to maybe a day or two, where you just suddenly feel like the past you is you again and everything from the name association, hobbies and beliefs come crashing back like a tidal wave, washing "current you" out of the picture for the time. And besides, they miss their friends. You think about their freinds from time to time, wanting to talk again, wanting to make the lingering sadness happy again...

Its happened again, 2023. I remember more clearly about 2019, since that was the "me" before me.

During 2019 me's "life" I went through another pretty traumatic event involving others who I trusted at the time, ended up homeless and really effed up. Obviously I made it out okay for the most part, I'm still alive and I'm here. I think 2019 me started dying around that time though.

And as it felt like 2019 me was dying, "others" started to feel like they were there. Past "me's" and the past tulpas and others as well who I never tried to intentionally create or who I remember as being a "reset." They would sometimes take over, like in that I would feel like I would suddenly be them and identified myself with their name, enjoyed their likes and hobbies, the dislikes, the views and opinions. And I wasn't actually "me" anymore, I was fully "them" in my opinion. Like a shape shifter who still feels themselves in the back of the current "you." Not really like a performance, like it was natural and correct.

At this point I want to notice we had stable housing and a stable job. Things were looking up around the time it felt like 2019 me was fading. While homeless "I" was the only one present, struggling to stay alive takes your full effort and attention and leaves very little room for thoughts pondering your potential identity. But after having a safe place to live is when we had that boom of sudden activity.

A lot of not much happens except daily life and occasional switches logged, happily accepting self as plural. Quietly too, I never ended up announcing it to anyone, and for most people we appeared as a single entity that just sometimes got into specific "moods." I was never actually interested in being loudly plural, even when I desired being plural from afar. Even back then I agreed (with myself lol) that if I ever found out I was plural we would keep it to ourselves and enjoy each other's company like an in-joke nobody else would ever be aware of but us.

But we did start to fade a bit, and after maybe just a month into 2023 everyone disappeared.

After the 2023 reset, I was left all alone, with all the knowledge of everything that happened. I felt again like a stranger in someone else's body, in their life. I knew inherently to keep up the charade and not tell anyone. I knew I couldn't just go up to 2019's friends and tell them "I'm sorry but you're a stranger to me now, like my sibling's friend's friends, and I'm really hurt by this because now i feel alone and empty." Nobody takes that the right way.

And I found a new fandom to be interested in so I could just pretend and "be someone else" and not have to address to 2019's friends why I suddenly stopped talking to them. New accounts, new personality. No name. Had several months of happy fun fandom time before the really bad feelings about abandoning my freinds and not explaining what happened at all to them started to set in.

Still, I was happy. I got to exist freely this time, maybe I could openly be plural online! But you know, the whole emptiness and they disappeared thing. It sucked, but I got little whispers here and there. Now that I think about it, I think they never really disappeared but just got super weak.

Whatever, the point here is I want them to come back but we keep having strained communication and difficulty with fuzziness any time any "non-me's" try to take over.

And I felt guilty.

So I messaged some of 2019's friends recently with mixed reception. Some of who just seemed like they were happy to hear anything at all after I disappeared completely for almost a whole year. Some who never really responded, Some of who I'm not even sure if they have seen it. Nobody really angry or anything. I didn't use any words like "plural" or "headmate" or anything. I explained it all as the past me being packed away completely, including the things they cared about, but still feeling that little sadness about it. Nobody brought up plurality either. I'm okay with that, I don't know if it's good to just suggest that out of nowhere to someone. But the lack of any question about that, especially from people who I know actually do know about systems, made me think really hard about if anything I expereinced here was even a plural thing or if it was just a mind trick I did because I was struggling with long lasting traumas. And I understand how ridiculous that sounds. I'm aware. I'm just trying to get it down in words that can be understood, it evokes that feeling of knowing you're right but fearing you're mistaken.

I'm so sorry I'm really tired and I didn't realize how long this post would take to type. I just got out of an exhausting shift at work and am so low on my battery words are starting to feel a bit strange for no reason.

So to cut the rest, the point in making this post is outside validation that I either AM or that I AM NOT making shit up because I wanted to be plural 10 years ago, or that I fucked up my brain by trying to make tulpas, or that I just discovered being a system through making tulpas I guess, or like what.

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY I am super upset and feel really bad and guilty and responsible for not being attached to anything from 2019's life, including their freinds and I have no idea why I have these "resets" and is that just a normal "living and growing as a person" thing or is that what splitting or whatever feels like or like... is that just me being an asshole?

Am I an asshole?

I feel so empty, no name, no freinds, no real personality except the emulation of an anime character... abandoned everyone I cared about for almost a whole year... its hard and requires a lot of effort to "be" the others, or even talk to them... I'm so tired.

[infinitethree]

hello, vio and helio! so, i was thinking - there are other servers in sanctuary’s world, and when vio arrived, their opinion of the then-smp was that it was a hellscape. what’s their current opinion of sanctuary? has it improved, and if so, how?

Helio’s eyes flick upwards from his keyboard, but he otherwise doesn’t react immediately.

Vio, on the other hand, groans and lifts his face out of the throw pillow it had been buried in. He’s slumped on his stomach on a long couch in Helio’s office. Judging by how it’s long enough for him to comfortably fit on, that's one of the primary reasons it’s there.

The alien complains, “Last world was shit, I’m not answering an essay question after that clusterfuck. I only really give advice and moral support now anyway, not that any of the actual team needs it.”

He faceplants into the pillow again, his tail flicking slightly. Some further mumble of discontent is said, but muffled too much to make out.

The other person in the room finally looks up from whatever he was working on. Helio leans back in his chair to consider the question.

"Vio never really leaves the server in that way, anyway. He doesn't like the crowds." "Outsiders are nosy! They ask too many questions about what I am, and then get pissy if I ask equally insulting ones right back!"

Helio points out, "You deliberately provoke them." "And they deserve it!" "I didn't say that they don't."

With a slight shrug, Helio continues, "So he's not a great resource on what the general public sentiment is. Honestly, nobody really…knows what's happened here. We prefer it that way. Sanctuary is a weird place with deeply traumatized residents. Even those who were here natively don't have many ties to outsiders. Pretty much all of us were invited explicitly because we didn't have much else."

As he speaks, Helio taps something out on his keyboard. A small holographic display opens up over his desk.

"Occasionally we get people nosing around, because names like Dream and Techno will probably always carry some weight. The fact that Dream basically became a recluse was weird even when I first joined the server. It's only gotten weirder that nobody has seen him since. This," he says, with a gesture towards the display, "is a list of fan sites, news outlets, and similar places who have dug into things too far."

It’s a long list, even just what’s on the screen. It seems to go well beyond that.

"Anyone who shows too much or the wrong kind of interest in a resident, the server, and methods to illegally enter a server are monitored. If anyone is caught sending or selling information about Sanctuary to outsiders, that'd be one of the few ways to get sent to one of our partner worlds. Too many people prying into our business risks the safety and sanity of everyone here. Other admins might take an interest in us. We don't know what that might mean, but probably nothing good," Vio adds.

Despite his grumbling, he seems genuinely uneasy at the thought of too much attention from borderline demigods. Sanctuary is pretty much a golden goose; everything from tech to mobs to blocks are brought back from other realities. Exploiting that fact would be very profitable.

It's why they would rather be safe than sorry about any potential threats. Someone might have benign intentions, but seeing the reality of what the Dream SMP has become could easily change that.

Any refugee or current resident is free to choose among several dozen other realities to live in, if they decide Sanctuary doesn't meet their needs. There are plenty where people can simply fuck off and never be seen again.

Thus far, they haven't had anyone they needed to force out. Those that leave do so willingly, and on at least somewhat decent terms.

It's part of the duties of the Welcome Wagon to prepare those people for the world they'll be living in. Supplies, learning basics of that world, and in some cases a cover identity are given.

They might have felt that entering Sanctuary was their only choice, but Sanctuary itself is only one of the many places that they might decide to live in. Hell– some former refugees end up helping acclimate others to their new world down the line.

Helio adds, "Sanctuary houses our people, and their safety is our top priority. Not just physically, but emotionally and mentally as well. Too many of us have lost too much." "I'm pretty sure Day would go on the warpath. Theo and probably quite a few others would join him. I've spent way too many hours in therapy recounting Doomsday to be interested in seeing them fully snap. I've spent too many hours seeing them fight to want to risk them going for blood," Vio agrees.

A long shudder visibly goes down both of their spines. Helio might have seen far less of what the Was-Taken family is capable of, but he knows enough.

Vio was, in no small part, inspired by fear to remain in what went on to become Sanctuary. Sure, Darkza wasn't great…but Day and Theo? Their presence was more than Vio wanted to deal with.

Hell, he refused to get close to saying negative things about Theo.

…And then Day and Theo showed up anyway. Helio still very vividly remembers how the purple tint to Vio's skin had gone sickly grey when he saw Day in the Dream SMP.

By now, Helio has seen and heard enough to believe that that had been a fully justified reaction. Day, for all that he is openly a doting father to six sons, is also terrifying.

One of the quieter rules of Sanctuary is not to push the immortal man too far. Some people can get away with more than others– Aster, for instance, has a fair bit of leeway because of his closeness with Theo and Lee. Others, like Lucid, are already on his bad side.

Day has a hell of a lot of stress resting on his shoulders. He does not need anyone deciding it'd be funny to fuck with him.

There was once, and only once, that Helio got a glimpse of just how deep Day’s trauma ran.

It was years ago by now. They had still been working out snags in getting new residents set up. Orph had called out the previous two days, a fact which led to Helio going to consult with him in-person.

Summer Hills had been eerily quiet. The area usually had a fair bit of noise; people going to Atlas' store, TVs, music, one or more of the Was-Taken brothers screaming, the forge, redstone…but on that day, there was nothing.

Just the wind, some mobs, and the nether portal.

That silence, more than anything else, had been what spurred Helio to try to find someone. If there was something wrong, then he needed to try to help– or at the very least to sound the alarm.

Positioned at the top of the main residence in Summer Hills, itself on top of a hill, the lights being on in Day’s room meant it was easy to spot.

When he used his elytra to get close without alerting any potential threats, he was attacked the second he got near enough to see anything.

Dee and Orph had come out swinging– and with how little room was available to move in on the deck, Helio had been forced to retreat out onto the roof.

That had been how he got a split second glimpse of DayDream. His complexion was pale, eyes unfocused, wings limp.

But he was sitting up. He was watching Helio like he wasn't entirely present.

Like he was a distant spectator to a show halfway tuned out.

Orph had grabbed his shirt and said to leave. His eyes were wild enough that he reminded Helio of one of the last times he saw Arode before his much later revival. That had been all the reason Helio needed to disengage and flee.

Sometimes, that sight– of someone who brought down a god, someone without whom they would largely be dead, with all the liveliness of a doll– still haunts his nightmares.

He's seen plenty of fucked up things. But Day being so detached is…something in its own class.

Maybe it's because Helio is aware he played a hand, no matter how unknowing, in his mental health being that wrecked.

Even if he hadn’t known what Quackity was up to, he never bothered to see the lone prisoner of Pandora's Vault. It never even occurred to him to try.

Lucid was pretty fucked up when he got out– it took years before he was able to get anywhere close to his pre-Vault physical state.

Day, from tidbits he's said over the years, was in there long enough that his body would have never recovered.

"The Was-Taken family," he notes, "do not fuck around with threats to their loved ones. Sanctuary getting tangled up in a war because someone opened their mouths counts as a threat."

And that’s without considering the fact that, evidently, Lee could become an admin like Lucid.

If Lee can't leave, his family would defend him to the bitter end. It wouldn't matter what the cost to them was, because personal risk is secondary to their creed of family first.

And, you know, Helio has spent quite a few years in this server. He’s attached to it and its residents. He's not really interested in seeing how it would fare if Lee became an admin and lost members of his family.

Just the idea makes him feel a cold sweat break out on the back of his neck.

"I don't want to see how the Swords and Shields would react to a war. I don’t want to see how Aster would react to a war," Vio mutters. From the lashing of his tail, he's distressed by the thought.

Helio shudders in agreement. The group is far from small. In fact, they are arguably the largest group in Sanctuary.

It started small, and then Helio blinked and there were enough members to warrant Atlas making molds for the ear cuff components.

More join all the time. He can’t even argue it's presence is a bad thing; it serves at least a dozen purposes. Lee is really just a convenient banner to unite under. He gives the Swords and Shields a justifiable reason to learn to fight better, a group of peers, a hobby, a support group, and countless more little reasons.

Daz and Raine, the two who helm the Welcome Wagon, do a fair bit to encourage membership. Aster does as well, just…more subtly.

A lot of people see him as inspirational. He has clawed his way up to stand toe to toe with Theo through little more than spite and stubbornness.

If he can do that, a lot of people reason, surely they can get within spitting distance of them, too.

Helio…honestly, kind of doubts that. Aster is special in some way that he can’t really explain. Something about him makes him a kindred spirit of Theo’s. Theo was good enough to be a primary combatant in a fight with a fucking god.

It’s not like Helio is a slouch in a fight. He just knows the two of them are well beyond his skill level.

“Any conflict with outsiders,” Helio repeats, “would end badly for everyone.”chronotag

[xenomorphee3]

screaming crying throwing up and kicking my feet in the air !! my fave writer has yet again done it again with her writing 💙💙 i will be honest, i tend to not follow or read sequels bc most disappoint me but yours is so good and we’re only at the second chapter 😭 i cannot wait for the third chapter (you have no idea) i just know miles is gonna be pissed with lex & zem lmao

also i love your take on avatar quaritch & zu and it’s so interesting bc had he been an avatar instead of a recom, i just know that man would take forever to finally admit to his true feelings for zu but omg imagine human miles just thinking about zu during meetings… 🤭

😮Your favorite writer🥺

Thank you 🥰

I am happy my sequel isn't disappointing! One of my friends expressed a similar sentiment, that they don't often follow sequels and at that point I had around 5 chapters written and was like 👁️👄👁️ But eh! I'm having fun and I knew at least a few people would tune in. Thank you for being a tuning in people 💙 And in many ways I hope its initial quality is better than the first given what I learned in writing that one, though of course plot and scale will be different!

Again, there is that anxiety of writing original characters that can go toe to toe with the real ones, but I'm doing my best! I wish I could write faster, so I could drop three a week to not keep you hanging, but by aiming for two and staying in a surplus of written chapters it *should* ensure no long lulls or hiatuses!

Anyway, to your alt-alt-universe inquiries-- Ha, yeah just imagine Quaritch seeing like... an orange pen or something and thinking about her eyes and getting all irritable lol.

As he sat at the long meeting table, RDA leadership discussing the Ash People, their potential usefulness and the resources of their archipelago, Miles glanced at an administrator who was taking notes on a yellow notepad instead of a tablet. Such was pretty damn old school and he found it amusing. But then he saw the orange pen he was writing with. Orange like fire-- like Zu's blazing irises. Miles' face suddenly turned and daggers developed in his blue eyes. Daggers toward who? Himself. Why the hell was he sitting here at Bridgehead thinking about his Avatar's Ash Na'vi host's orange eyes? The foul expression that gripped his face did not go unnoticed. General Ardmore caught his sudden shift in emotion in the middle of her discussion. "Colonel, what's wrong?" she pressed. He looked up and around at all sitting at the table, realizing the blatant irritation he was broadcasting. He steeled himself. "Nothing, General... I... I don't think these damn Ash Na'vi are gonna be that useful to us."

And for efficiency, to answer your next submitted question:

"to add up on that, what do you think human quaritch would’ve thought about zu? 🤭💙 and i would love to know how he’d react knowing his recom has children with her"

Human Quaritch with no Avatar influence or Na'vi experience would definitely look at Zu the way he looks at all Na'vi. A pest in the way of human interests. He'd probably be repulsed to a large degree by the concept of being that is him/from him having such a family, regardless of the Na'vi aspect.

But that's one of the things that makes his character so compelling in the 2nd film isn't it? That this Na'vi hating man is now what he hated. And in existing as this new being, he quickly comes to embrace that he is no longer really that person-- at least in waves.

He crushes his former skull.

He tells Spider, "I'm not that man,"

His eagerness to do things the Na'vi way

Tells Neytiri, "He's not mine, we're not even the same species."

He shows a bit of mercy on the Na'vi he interrogated.

But! He still says to Jake, "You betrayed me," refers to Jake's kids as a "litter of half breeds," and still cares for Spider as his son. It's such a cool little war inside him that I am so excited to see shake out in the remaining films. My eagerness for seeing such is why I wrote/am writing my stories! I hope my stories capture/do justice to 10% of his actual arc.

[lucysweatslove]

Took a test this morning, 45 questions and scheduled for 90 min, and finished in ~25 min. Might be one of my fastest. Did I miss a couple questions because I was going too fast and didn’t fully read? Yes of course I did. But am I capable of taking a test slowly, especially when I’m worried my parents’ home will be engulfed by a fire? Nope.

I’ve taken an attitude towards med school in-house exams that I haven’t really had about tests pre-med school. I do not give two flying fucks if I miss a couple questions here and there, least of all because I wasn’t reading the question fully. I used to be the person who hated getting anything wrong, wanted to be top of the class, etc. But honestly, there are just too many variables outside of knowledge or “ideal” ability to apply said knowledge that factor into exams. Sleep, nutrition, stress, illness… air quality because when air quality is low my nose stuffs up and I can’t sleep… medication timing and the meals I eat around that time all impact med metabolite levels at any given point…

And while yes ideally I would know everything and have perfect logic, NO human can do that 100% of the time, and we have soooo many resources for support “in the real world” that we don’t have on exams. It’s far more important to me that I know how to check my work or thinking quickly than it is that I can focus enough to catch a hidden keyword. It’s more important to me that I know how to ask for clarification gently than it is that I can tease out by myself what somebody means when they say something awkwardly worded.

Imagine going through life on edge over these little things, thinking you have to figure it out alone, no help from anybody, no communication from anybody. No wonder I was so anxious before. No wonder I was constantly burnt out.

Anyway my point being I’m very grateful for p/f and no class rankings, because now I can take better care of myself and allow for normal variation day to day without worrying about its impact on my career.

[manonamora-if]

UX anon here - thank you for your response! I didn't realize the lack of resources in the community tbh. Would it be helpful if there was a master post of basic mobile UX principles to follow? Or would it be more helpful to gather a bunch of pre-existing twine templates and iterate them to be more in line with said principles? Or both?

Hi again Anon! :D

Yeah... it's kind of a common feeling. You [general you] don't know how much knowledge/resource/time/etc you need to invest until you actually make the thing you are enjoying. I've done the same when watching movies/series, believing I could write better dialogue... lol the audacity of my brain honestly...

I did make a Twine resource list some weeks back, with all I knew/could find, but I don't think there are any resource focused on mobile only. Though I do think most templates have some sort of mobile formatting/scaling in mind (even if not perfect). So this is definitely a niche to fill!

When it comes to the nitty-gritty of things, I can't really tell you which path to take (I am just one creator in the sea of many). You could send a poll to other authors, see their input.

I would advise against, though, reiterate pre-existing twine templates without the explicit consent of the creator (it might go without saying, but just in case). They might even prefer editing their templates with those advice instead of seeing their "updated" templates available out there (that's def the case for me).

But I do think the idea of a Master Post of Basic Principles with clear instructions (and images of what is good/not good!) would definitely be helpful. It leaves you open to go in more details about other principles in the future (if you want to do so, obviously you shouldn't feel pressured).

Last bit of advice, maybe check out Twine and how the different formats have built their visuals. It probably help you understand the limitations creators face when editing their UI. Theoretically, you could do anything on Twine, especially with SugarCube/Chapbook/Snowman (Harlowe is... wonky). But there are some class that have different rules depending on them being built through CSS or JavaScript.

EDIT: IF YOU POST SOMETHING LIKE THAT ON TUMBLR, TAG ME SO I CAN SHARE IT!!!

I'm also going on a bit more rambling, because I've realised I've had more feelings about the topic. PS: not directed at anyone in particular, just letting some steam out.

This is also my personal opinion, but I don't think (non-physical) IF was ever intended to be on mobile in the first place (ahem parsers/point-and-click...). When IF became a thing, there were no mobile (so that question was moot anyway). You just had a computer (maybe) that would run a program. I feels like it's been more of an evolution towards mobile use, as smaller/touch screens became the more prevalent device for entertainment (in general, not just IF). You have apps like CoG or HostedGames or those Story ones (they kind of look like VNs) that are very popular (and are incidentally fit for mobile...). And now we expect this of everyone that start with IF.***

While IF programs/format do allow for mobile support (to different degree), I do think we have to remind ourselves from time to time that IF creators still often create as a hobby, with often limited knowledge and resources. The fact that we sometimes/often uphold some IF to standard as high as actual game companies (who have headcounts and resources and knowledge to make things better) is just mind boggling to me (the number of asks/comments I get about my UI not looking professional because of a few mistakes...). Even trying to go through actual big company website is sometimes dreadful on mobile. Unileveeeeer *raise fist to the sky*...

Resources to make things more accessible (especially program/format specific) should be available to people, but we should leave some leeway to people who can't implement things or just don't want to. It might suck, but yeah... Think of it as computer exclusive projects (like you'd have with consoles :P ).

***Little side note, but we had a similar-ish discussion on the forum about Twine games during the IF Comp. It wasn't about mobile accessibility but the game being unstyled, and how many expected Twine entries to have some sort of styling and not just use the base UI, while the expectation was not as present (or not at all) for other programs. It is very interesting to go through.

[universitypenguin]

Hey, can I get some writing advice?

So, after you come up with a story idea what do you do next?

Do you brainstorm for that story? Or make a character profile?

Because I have a story idea and idk what to do next. I read about it and they say to brainstorm but then I'm like "how am I going to right if I don't know who I'm writing? " But then I feel like I'm not doing it correctly.

I know it sounds silly but I would really appreciate some help. 🙏

So, I had to think about this one for a while, because the way I write has changed so much over the years. What I've put together is more geared towards how I used to write when I was developing my skills.

Without further ado, here's my official advice.

The most important thing you can do is realize that not everything you write is gold, and that's fine. Never compare your unedited draft to someone else's published work.

As C.J. Cherryh once said:

"It's perfectly okay to write garbage - as long as you edit it brilliantly."

Be consistent about writing and keep going, even on the days when you're not getting very far. Even on days when you know your writing sucks, write anyways. (They made the delete button for a reason. Go make your mistakes, and cover up the evidence as you see fit.) Forming the habit of writing regularly is what turns you into a writer more than anything.

Step #1: Pre-Writing

When I first get a story idea, I take time to daydream about it. Letting my mind wander is usually the best thing to do in these moments. At first, I don’t take any notes. I just like to see what sticks. If the idea drifts away, I assume it wasn’t meant to be and move on. If it sticks around and keeps circling back, then I know it’s a thread I probably should start spinning. 

Next, I like to do concept maps. The quick diagram with bubbles and arrows that show relationships helps me organize things in a simple manner. This step usually helps me enlarge the plot and figure out what I need and what’s extraneous. 

The most important thing about prewriting is to make sure your story has a solid conflict and at least four parts. These four parts are: 

Introduction

Inciting Incident

Immediate Reaction

Reaction

If these conditions seem to be fulfilled I begin writing.

Step #2: Writing

Step two is writing. Here, I’ve found the best thing to do is write while the idea is hot. This is when I do my best writing, when the emotion is fresh and my mood is just right. However… I usually have an amazing writing day about once every two years. So, I have to do what most mere mortals do. I sit down at my desk, put my hands on the keyboard, and demand of myself that I at least produce 200 words. Once I’ve hit that mark there’s usually some momentum going, which makes the next 200 words much easier.

This is where I write the first four chapters, which are what I listed out above. The introduction, the inciting incident, the character’s immediate reaction, their considered reaction after they’ve had their “off the cuff” reaction, and then I stop. 

Here, it’s good to take a step back and look at what you’ve written. Does the story have enough conflict? How does your character sound and feel? Are you enjoying yourself? I think writing four chapters should be enough to identify if you’ve got a story or if you need to develop the idea a bit more.

Step #3: Developmental Editing

Whatever the answers to those questions are, I usually do some developmental editing at this point. I might not finish the story, but it’s always good to flex your creative muscles and see if you can fix something that’s flawed. 

To develop an idea, I rely on story structure. There are a lot of good resources out there for structure. My first experience with structure was from the 27 scene outline. 

In my opinion, this is a great way to learn how to form a coherent plot. It’s very exact in laying out the story beats a writer needs to hit. That said, it’s also very constraining. I used this to learn how to form a narrative, but since then I’ve become more flexible with my story structures. 

Other plot structures I’ve enjoyed using are the beat sheet from “Save the Cat,” as well as four act structure, and six act structure. Each of these presentations of a story structure has its strengths and weaknesses, so figuring out what methods appeal to your style and what doesn’t work, is very useful. For short fiction there’s a thing called the “seven point” structure which I often refer to even now. Short fiction is not among my strengths… so I have to work harder at it than I would a novel. 

Another great resource for developmental editing is the YouTube channel run by Ellen Brock. She’s an editor and posts really informative videos about things like what type of writer are you, which is a very useful thing to understand when you're trying to write. She also has a phenomenal story structure series that’s one of the best I’ve come across. 

If you’re struggling, turn to other sources of inspiration. For myself, I like to read about the craft of writing. It's always good to remember that inspiration comes and goes, but skills can earn you an income. My book recommendations would be: 

Save the Cat - Blake Snyder 

Plot and Structure - James Scott Bell 

How to Write Dazzling Dialogue - James Scott Bell 

On Writing - Stephen King

Lastly, always remember this quote from Ray Bradburry:

“Write a short story every week. It's not possible to write 52 bad short stories in a row.”

I hope this has been helpful. Also, I love to talk about the craft of writing, so feel free to message me if you have any follow up questions!