#anyway here r my old men. enjoy

[vebokki]

revived to post this

[marrycv]

Muse

rockstar!ellie x reader

warnings : SMUT!!, no to consentement (happened with a men ellie saved us), alcohol, ✂️✂️✂️, swearing, age gab? (ellie be like 2-3 years older), thigh riding (r ! receiving), fingering (r ! receiving)

idk if thats all but i worked hard on this one 😜

enjoy!!

—

“Cmonnnnn we’re gonna be late!!”

“not my fault you took 2 hours in the shower?”

you and your bestfriend were getting ready for that little concert that was in your city. it was so rare you had finally something fun to do, and the best part of it, is that your favourite band was gonna be there. you were so excited to go there, but your bestfriend was just making you nervous, in the worst way ever.

you had a denim mini skirt with a lace crop top in black with some leather jacket, classic ‘rockstar girlfriend’ outfit if you’d search it on pinterest. but, it was a rock show anyways, so you were fitting in that vibe.

you had a little smug eyeliner with some star glitter around your eyes. your best friend has some too. exited by the fact that you two were matching like some 13 years old teenagers.

“okay, im ready”

“about time!! now come on, i dont wanna arrive while its crowded, wanna have the best view” she tells you while bringing you outside towards her car

“girl did you know my fav band are gonna be here??”

“ugh omg you said it at least one thousand times…” she sighs

“okay okay, will you be less annoyed when i tell you they look like this :” you said as you showed her the guitarists and the singer. they were 3 and your age. absolutely gorgeous people.

“YOOOOOOOOO!!!” Layla said, looking at the picture of the three bend’s members.

“rightttt?!!!”

“okay but look at the men?”

“his name is Jesse, one of the guitarist. currently dating the other guitarist” you informed her, for only her smile dropping at the deception.

“look, thats the singer” you continue “her name’s Ellie, and shes SO fucking hot, and shes gay”

“lesbian?” she asks you while she starts driving towards the location for tonight.

“yeah, literally everyone who listen to their music is because all the fans envy her. i dont blame them tho”

“what about the other guitarist?” she asks you, now interested in them

“Its Dina, Ellie’s ex”

“WHAAAAAT ??? nowayyyy”

you two laugh at the drama you shared to layla. it was funny gossiping and her finally showing some interest in what you liked.

-

arrived there, it was already crowded. nobody was on stage yet, but it was definitely bigger than you expected.

you friend touched your shoulder, knowing how much noisy places made you so uncomfortable.

“what aboouuuuuut we get VIP tickets for a quieter place mhh?”

“Layla? its too expensive i cant afford that, ill just- support it” you tell her, looking at your phone trying to distract yourself

“too late babe i bought us some” she says, looking at you with the biggest smile. eyes disappearing and teeth showing. She was your sunshine.

“whaaat? you shouldn’t have- im gonna repay you when i can okay?”

“nuh huh, its our night and my gift, okay?”

you nod and smile, worries erased by her gentle smile.

it was true, it was you guy’s night, and no anxiety would take that away.

In the VIP room, there was mostly middled aged men with some really young, but beautiful girls in their company. all already wasted. from here, you could be so close to the stage you thought if the artists would be close enough, you could touch them. you also had access to the backstage, which was an insane opportunity.

some normal people, like your age hanging out with people their age were also in the VIP. it was less awkward with all of those creepy men probably were ‘sugar daddies’

“im gonna grab us a drink ill be back, yeah?” layla whisper-screams in your ears then vanishes to the bar.

you look around you, analyzing the people. then get on your phone, just to seem lees alone.

“Hey you gorgeous lady, would you mind some company?” a raspy voice said

you look towards the voice and see a men, probably 25 years old, but obviously drunk and maybe also high.

“i already have company, but thanks” you said, gently, not wanting anything to happen.

“oh, but i dont see anyone babygirl…” he said as he leaned closer to you while you backed off a little.

his eyes widen, completely surprised by your non interested move.

“im not gonna bite youuu, only if you ask me to” he says and winks at you while touching your arm, going closer and closer to your breast.

“um.. no thanks..” you said, trying to get away, searching around for layla’s figure somewhere around…

“why are you so fucking rude? huh? cant even be happy someone wants to be with you mh? ‘lil slut..” he said as his grip on your arm was tightening, probably gonna leave a mark after.

“please-“ you started but got cut by someone else, behind you two

“she said no man”

the men looks behind him, feeling his grip on your arm going insanely tight. you hiss by the pain.

“she’s with me” he answers to the girl you yet didn’t dare to look at, feeling embarrassed by this whole situation

“are you with this man, miss?” the girl asked you.

her tone completely shifting from raspy, loud and angry to sweet and gentle. making you look up from the ground to see the Ellie Williams defending you. you answer her a small ‘no’. scared if you talked louder the men would take away your arm at this point. or scared you’d cry from anger. the tight feeling you felt in your throat was cutting your voice to get through, if the knot would get destroyed, you’d probably sob right here, but it would only get tighter, feeling like it was taking the oxygen away from your lungs. feeling like it was choking you so it couldn’t pass anymore. would only make your heart beat slower due to the little air you were able to breathe. but you felt like it was beating faster, like you just ran kilometers and stopped suddenly. making your body react in a bad way in the sudden change.

but that was only a feeling.

you just looked, away.

you could hear Ellie yell at the men until his grip on you left to only see his arm swing towards ellie’s face. only that she dodged his punch smoothly. almost satisfying to watch her doing it like she was the finest fighter in the world.

but the slowmo and the muffled voices stopped and when Ellie punched him. Everything was too loud and too clear.

blood getting out of the man’s mouth. attacking Ellie back. everyone screaming and getting away from the fight, creating a non purpose circle.

suddenly it wasn’t a rock show, but a fight show.

Once Ellie completely knocked out the men, him completely passed out on the ground, blood all over his face. she went towards you

“You okay?” she asked, gently as she didnt even just fought with someone like she was gonna kill him.

you simply nodded to her, shocked by this whole situation, never wanting it to end up this way.

“come with me, yeah? ill get you some water and… clean you up” she said looking at your cheek, having some blood on it.

you just followed her into her lodge. it was quiet and cozy.

nobody was in there, but you were kinda nervous about the fact that you were literally with a celebrity.

“sit down” she obeyed.

you sat on the closest chair you saw, following her orders like a dog, still under shock.

ellie took a glass and poured water in it, placed it on the table next to you, then took a small towel and again, put water on it. she came real close to you, her head titled on the side a little bit, her fingers took your chin and made your head move a little bit on the side. she took the towel and took the blood away from your cheek. probably the men’s blood. ellie didn’t have one single scratch. only her knuckles were brushed.

you watched her taking care of you like a little kitten she had found on the road and just, felt bad for it.

her eyes were concentrated on what she was doing, her fingers touching you so gentle, so softly. her bottom lip between her teeth due to the concentration. she might looked so rough earlier, but here? she was the softest person you’ve ever laid eyes on.

“here..” she said as she stopped what she was doing. she sat next to you, with concerned eyes. she suddenly cared so much about you.

“thanks” you whispered, looking down to the glass of water in front of you.

“dont thank me, this guy was an asshole. are you hurt?” she asked looking at your arm, knowing he was holding it.

“if i were you id worry more about your hands” you said looking at them, all bloody and swallowed.

“its okay, dont worry about me…” She said getting up to grab some ice for your arm

“no, take it.” you said, putting it on her fingers trying to ease her pain from defending you.

the room went silent, a comfortable silence. the ones where you didnt rush do say anything or where you werent overthinking to find a subject to talk about.

Ellie on the other hand, was going insane. You were so pretty and you had a pin on your purse about their bands which meant that you were a fan. which meant you knew about her and listened to her music. the silence was driving her insane. she’d just wish she was a normal person who weren’t screaming for her name out there. screaming for her and the fact that they all wanted her. like she was theirs. but she didn’t want that. she wanted to be yours, and it wasn’t gonna be easy. she thought you were scared by her, she thought you saw her completely different now, that you’d stop listening about her being so so toxic with girls with the best beat dina and jesse could ever put to make everyone forget about how of an asshole she was.

about how the girl was hers but she wasnt the theirs. about how she just fucked the girl cause she was bored.

but now, you could saw her as a crazy girl that punches someone almost to death. someone dangerous.

you were just too pretty for this man, for this treatment. she would have done this for anyone, but taking care of them after? nahhh she wouldve just walked away.

“whats your name..?” Ellie asked, looking dead up in your eyes like she wasn’t going crazy on overthinking.

“my name’s ______” you tell her.

“im uh, im Ell-“

“Ellie Williams, yeah i know”

“of course you do..” she sighed at herself.

“fuck- i uh my friend… she’s gonna be dead worried!! fuck fuck” you say, completely on panic mode

“hey, hey, hey, its okay, just send her a message to let her know youre all good, im not letting you out there again, something worse could happen to you.” she says, in a stern tone.

“you worried about me Williams?” you ask her, calmed but surprised by her reaction, slightly titling your head a little bit. the small amount of alcohol in your system making you bolder than you ever could.

“believe it or not sweetheart, i care about my fans”

something in what you said activated Ellie’s dangerous side. she was gonna torture you and never let you go.

“dont you have a show you have to do? for the caring of your fans?”

“i believe they can wait a little bit, dont you think?” she smirked at you.

that goddamn smirk she’d have in those pinterest pictures of her if you searched up her name on the search bar. that smirk when she was on live and someone would tell how much they loved her. or when her fans would ask her to sign on their boobs.

that smirk.

“how disappointed i would be if i was one of those, knowing you were just sitting in here with someone you didnt even knew”

“mhhh i wouldnt care less doll”

you blushed at the nickname, you’d cringe if someone else would’ve called you like that, but the way she said made your panties grow a little wet spot faster than you thought your body could.

you shifted a little bit in your chair, uncomfortable by how sweaty you’ve just became.

“dont you think its hot.. in here?” you said, praying for her to not notice it was because of how much your heart was pumping, making you red everywhere.

“follow me” Ellie said, getting up and walking in another room. you were almost too shaking to even walk but you managed to make your way to ellie. she was in a small bedroom. how could you know lodges had bedrooms? no idea.

“we have those bedrooms if someone from the bend is tired or dont feel good, very useful. i think it was Beyoncé that asked that”

“you know beyoncé???” you asked completely amazed

“uhhh, no. im a small artist, not a pop star” she laughed and made herself comfortable on the bed.

you sat next to her, but shy enough to keep your distance away from her a little.

Ellie just grabbed a guitar that was hanging on the wall and started to play a little melody. her fingers stroking the strings so perfectly, making them some beautiful note and then you recognized the song. she was signing one of hers.

its like you were in a dream, the room was so dark but there was lights everywhere, hanging like a teenage room. making able to see everything with the most perfect lighting, you were able to see the intense shadows from ellie’s perfect muscles. aligned how it was made, like god modelled them himself with his own hands. the way she was just there looking at where her fingers were at to know what note to play next. her foot tapping around with the beat. her hair being lighten by the small yellow lights, making her auburn hair look way more softer than usual.

you couldn’t contain yourself at the sight.

“wanna try?” Ellie asked, handing you the guitar with smile on her lips… her perfect lips- ok stop this madness.

“i- i dont know how to play”

“ill teach you- here, put it on your legs…” she then got closer and took your hands to place them to make a chord. “and here is the chord C major” she smiled at you. “easy right?”

“sure, if i dont count the fact that my fingers are about to explose”

she looked at you and laughed, you did the same. you felt now so comfortable with her.

“alright..” she said,

“get in my lap imma teach you some other stuff.”

“huh?”

“the guitar, you trust me?”

she said, clarifying your dirty mind.

“uh yeah, i do” you said then sat in front of her, between her legs. she wrapped her arms around you and guided your fingers, showing you the chords. one by one.

her fingers felt sooo good on your skin, you were just wondering how good they felt inside of you.

you knew that what you were feeling was wrong, that you two just met but you couldn’t help to press your ass to her crutch. Ellie’s words stuttered, and so did yours. every words were slower and her mouvements were more sensual, if you werent delusional.

the tension just kept growing and only one more move and it could be done for the both of you.

she pressed her head in your shoulder. still teaching you. a hand on yours- guiding you and another on your hip… and she just made you get closer to her, as you could even get closer. you were trying to not moan at this point. what she was doing, ‘teaching’ you guitar and making your heart skip a beat, pretending like nothing else was happening, like it was just all in your imagination. but the feeling was so strong, so strong.

you felt her lips stroking against the skin of your neck while she was whispering you the instructions of the next chords.

crazy how an hour ago you were with your bestfriend, being exited about just seeing ellie live, and here you were, she was literally teaching you how to play guitar with hers. this felt all like it was some kind of prank, too good to be true, but you were just there to enjoy yourself at 100%.

Ellie’s hand on your hip was now playing around on your thigh, she’d tell you how good you were doing. she then moved her hand, painfully slow in your inner thigh. your breathing was speeding up like she was already in you…

she has just touch you so little.

you craved her so much.

you let her get higher, she stoked her fingers on your clothed cunt, could feel the wet spot on your panties that was growing since you got into her lodge.

“is this okay?” she asked you. scared she was taking everything too far, but you just pushed her hand closer to where you needed her the most.

Ellie took the guitar away from the both of you and turned you over so she could see your face.

your legs wrapped around her waist and now both of her hands were on your hips.

the atmosphere completely changed. it was romantic and comfortable 2 seconds ago, and now its so much more intense, the room feels hotter and your nervousness is on the top of your head controlling you to stay still.

“ellie…” you whined.

that made ellie so much more bold. her hands moved up from your hips to your cheeks, not forgetting to touch every part of your skin that was on the way. it wasn’t too slow and either too fast, just enough to realize she was getting closer and closer while her eyes switched on your eyes to your lips. you leaned in, like she was a magnet, pulling you towards her. her lips on yours felt the most right thing you’ve ever felt. they were so soft, so warm, so so tender against your lips. the kiss turned into a make out soon enough like it was a relief from all the tension that had built. her tongue dancing against yours, feeling this feeling of euphoria in your whole body, only catching yourself needed more and more.

unconsciously, your hips were rocking against any pressure you could find. ellie stopped her kisses to only replace them on your neck. you tilt your head to give her more access. you had no idea what you were doing, its like your body went into full control and your mind was just beyond the clouds, seeing the stars when her knee pressed against your clothed cunt. a moan and a a relief sigh escaped your lips.

all was happening so fast and ellie was taking your shirt off, as you were doing the same to her, like in those romantic movies when the two characters find eachothers and they get heated in the moment. like there wasn’t time, like you were late to somewhere.

ellie’s fingers found their way, once again on your clit.

“you mind if i take this off?” she asked, with a smirk, but you could see her cheeks blushing, her breath being fast… her hands shaking.

you nodded, way too speechless of the goddess in front of you

“words, i need words baby”

“take it off” you saw, looking at your legs that were still wrapped around ellie’s waist.

ellie layed you down on the bed, now on top of you, looking at you up and down, analyzing your body. she gently touched the hem of your skirt to take it off. you lifted your hips up to help her. her mouvement were painfully slow, as she was trying to make this sooo memorable.

your panties along with your hips were now on the floor of the room. laying with only your bra left.

ellie’s lips returned to yours, while you could feel her hands getting closer to where you needed her the most.

“ellie..?”

“yes, yes? what’s wrong?” she asked, genuine

“i uh.. can i ride on you?” you asked her, closing your eyes to try and hide yourself from the immense embarrassment you felt, but before you knew it, ellie stood up, you looked at her, clearly confused about what she was doing

to your surprise, she only stripped herself, finding her now completely naked. you could see her abs.. her biceps.. the ‘v’ kind of shape she had on her lower stomach.. her small, yet perfect boobs, only finding your mouth watering at the sight- and not only your mouth but your pussy was drenched too.

“are you gonna stop staring at me?” ellie asked as she climbed on top of you, kissing you- again

maybe she felt magnified to you too? just like you felt so attracted to her

you were winning in anticipation and excitement

naturally, her leg intertwined with one of yours so both of your clits were pressing against eachothers.

feeling her like that against you was heaven. grinding yourself against her was beyond beautiful. the scene was so pornographic that i’d create a new sin in the bible.

“els! im so.. close… fuck!!”

“me too, fuck.. together yeah?”

and just like that she gave a couple more trusts against you and you did the same, as your mouvements were synchronized, as if it was destiny to find her and make love with the love of your life.

you saw and felt fireworks, a big release escaped as you were almost screaming by pleasure. and ellie was just, amazed by your fucked expression she could cum again over and over by just being on top of you, looking at you this beautiful. she couldnt stop.

“els! please!” you said as you felt overstimulated by your previous orgasm.

“please give me another one, please.” ellie was begging at this point. as she needed it more than you, as she felt it in her.

she could go on and on, and you would let her abuse your cunt for the rest of your life if it felt like that.

[diremoone]

written in fine print | r. sukuna

moving to japan to get a breath of fresh air was supposed to be one of the best decisions you’ve ever made. it still may be, but now you’ve got a problem and you don’t know what to do about it. the problem? ryomen sukuna, one of the wealthiest men on the planet, being… enamored with you. you’ve come fairly far with him as “friends” while keeping him at bay, but after you both spend christmas together, you know that things have changed. and come the first day of the new year comes a surprise that forces you to face your bottled-up truth.

[ Ryomen Sukuna Masterlist ] | part three

w — slowburn, age gap, modern au, older man/younger woman, fluff, mild? angst, this time we get reader’s pov bc it’s time ;3, insecure! reader, self-indulgence, A KISS (but just one for now sorry y’all), reader and sukuna lay their feelings on the table (I’m sorry I couldn’t help but finally get to this part), sukuna gets kinda prose-y lmao, slightly unsatisfied with this fic but I hope y’all enjoy anyway, sprinkle of bittersweet at the end

God, have mercy upon my soul.

The dozens of text messages from your cousin have you sitting on the edge of your bed in absolute disbelief. You haven’t even had any coffee yet, or any sort of something in your stomach. It’s sheer willpower keeping you from throwing up the stomach acid in your belly.

But you do need something. You make your way into the kitchen and nab the biscuits you made yesterday from the bag they were in. You shouldn’t, but you eat all four of them anyway. Then you drink something.

You were wondering why everything was going too good, why life had been so… easy as of late. Now you understood why. It was the calm before the storm. It was the universe allowing you to have some semblance of peace before it decided to throw you into the pit of mental and emotional turmoil that you’d been so great at avoiding.

Why in the world did the universe decide to put Ryomen Sukuna into your life?

That’s the question you have been asking yourself over and over again ever since you decided to take him up on the offer of a first date six months ago. Even worse, why did you even think it was a remotely good idea to get involved with someone over ten years older than you? Universe aside, you should’ve had the good judgement to keep Sukuna away. Your good intuition was something you’d always prided yourself on, so why did you decide to even let Sukuna keep coming around?

You go back to your room and get the phone, rereading over the messages. One in particular your eyes stay on:

A benefactor has paid for nana’s care and set her up in a really fancy, upscale care and rehabilitation facility here. They came and got her this morning to transfer her. When I asked about it, someone from registration said it was a gift for you. Who the fuck did you meet in Japan? 5:16 am

And you know, deep within your soul and in your gut that Sukuna was behind this. There’s no one you know that has the money to pull off something like taking your grandmother from where she was to a facility where she’s going to get more constant help, cleaned, proper rehabilitation. No one else but him.

The coffee maker suddenly beeps, beginning to brew a fresh pot of coffee. You almost jump out of your skin from it. You wait until it’s done before digging out one of the banana nut muffins Shoko brought over two nights ago to pre-celebrate the new year.

You truly don’t know what to feel. You’re unsure about everything. Coming to Japan to get a breath of fresh air from the strain your old life was supposed to be one of the best choices you’ve ever made. But now, all it’s become is a whirlwind of even more, even deeper emotional confusion.

Meeting Yuuji was great. Meeting his older brother? The entire source of the emotional confusion.

You lean against the counter and gaze outside. The snow has finally ceased and you’re sure dozers are out clearing the roads. You can’t help but fall into your thoughts.

For awhile, you’ve had… feelings. You’re not quite sure what they are, but you know that they revolve around the older, rich man you’ve befriended. You know that whenever he’s around, you feel more… open, lighter even. You know he makes you feel flustered, to which you’ve learned to seal said fluster inside of a bottle and remain indifferent in his presence. Every time he looks at you or speaks to you, it makes you feel… giddy. Happy, dare you say it.

And it’s something you swallow down and hide every time it bubbles to the surface, fearing that it’ll be nothing more than the same story as your mother: a heart broken by the letdown of not ever being enough, not being what the man actually wanted, and not being genuinely cared for.

The mug of coffee in your hands grows hot, almost scalding against the skin of your palms. It brings you out of your own mind, just in time to hear your phone vibrate with more text messages, all still from your cousin.

Because apparently fate dropped a man in your lap that was more than ready to give you anything and everything you’ve ever wanted: unconditional love on a gold platter; fate decided that you finally deserve a break from strife and grief, that you deserved to stop eating humble pie, because lord knows you’ve done choked and damn near suffocated on that shit; that you deserved to be cherished and loved and made to be someone’s number one in their life.

You know. You fucking know what Sukuna does to you, how he makes you feel inside. You also know how he wants to treat you and the things he wants to do to you. And perhaps with you, if your gut instinct is right and he wants more than a body to warm his bed.

Who are you kidding? You know you’re right.

But it’s unfortunate for you that all you’ve learned to do is bottle up your feelings and act like they don’t exist. Because you’ve never been loved, not romantically anyway. Especially not like this, from someone like this.

How were you supposed to love? What did it really mean to be in a relationship? You’ve never been in one. Not one that ever really was going to go as far as this. Was what you were feeling all temporary? And if you did get into a relationship, what if he didn’t like you when you got comfortable? What if he didn’t like it when you laughed too hard, or any of the habits you have? What if he was just wanting to play savior and ended up leaving you a few months from now?

You toss your head back and groan. Why? Why was this happening to you?

You opt to spend the day inside, rather than go out like you had planned. You have to text Shoko and Utahime, letting them know that you’re not going to be able to participate in their plans of going out and visiting shrines for the new year. The latter is reasonably mad, but Shoko calms her down in the group chat. Although she does make an innuendo about spending the day with someone else “cozied up in bed” rather than them. You send her a side eye emoji in return on her personal thread.

You change out of your pajamas and into some casual clothes — a dark red long sleeve and some black sweatpants, switching to house socks to regular socks — despite not intending to go out for the day. You do end up on the couch for most of the day, switching your attention from the TV and the messages on your phone more than you care to admit. You hardly eat, and don’t realize it until you can feel your stomach against your spine each time.

All day is basically wasted in front of the television, trapped in your own mind. Trapped in the whirlwind that Sukuna has made of your heart and emotions.

You graze through your entire stock of sweets in less than a day, uncaring if it was unhealthy. Dusk settles on the horizon before you know it and you’re anything but tired. In fact, you’re wide awake.

“What do I do…?” you ask into the open air. You feel stupid doing it, but apparently fate has a response for you.

It’s 9:18 at night when several strong knocks rap at your door.

It’s 9:20 when you decide to finally answer the door.

It’s 9:24 when you realize you’ve got a guest at the front door, the very same man who’s been making you question yourself and your whole life ever since coming to this country.

It’s 9:30 when you question to yourself why you let him in. You didn’t think it through, that much you’re sure of. How could you be when he’s thrown your heart all topsy-turvy and mushed it into goo?

Just looking at him from his back floods your mind and makes your heart race, something you hope you’re able to hide by what you hope is a face of indifference and calmness. You can see the tattoos peek out from his turtleneck, and you have to gulp down your nervousness.

The large mug of fruity tea you’ve poured has now chilled, the ice just barely clinking in the glass. You quickly open the cookie jar on the counter and shove two snickerdoodles in your mouth to stress-eat being prepared for what was coming next.

“I…” you begin, and embarrassingly realize you have to swallow the cookies to talk. “I wasn’t expecting you to… show up.”

Sukuna’s silent for a moment, then replies stoically, “Neither was I.”

You gaze at him longer than you intend to. Your attention is mostly on his tattoos, the little bits that are peeking out from the deep crimson of his form-fitting turtleneck. You watch him readjust the watch on his wrist, partially revealing the tattoo inked onto his wrist. To your surprise, Sukuna actually doesn’t like showing off his tats. He used to in his younger years; he’s still proud of them, but he isn’t as much into flaunting them to the world nowadays.

Sukuna’s deep voice cuts through the air. “Have you… gotten my gift?”

You bite your lower lip. You nod even though he can’t see you. “Yeah… If you mean the one involving my grandmother, then yes.”

“I do apologize if I crossed any lines doing such a thing,” he says. “But I don’t regret it.”

“I can imagine you don’t,” you reply, knowing full-well that him regretting anything was a very rare occurrence. “But… Why? Why would you do that? Go through such trouble to help me… and my family? Just… Why?”

His ginormous frame turns to face you to look into your eyes and answer with nothing short of honesty, “Because I want you to be cared for. I’ve seen happiness in your eyes and I want to keep you happy. I want to be the one making you happy.”

“Buying my love will only get you so far,” you say.

“I know. I want to do more for you. I want… to be more for you. Not just… this. Whatever we have going on,” Sukuna admits casually, crossing his burly arms over his chest. But he doesn’t make eye contact. In fact, he keeps his eyes to the floor, away from your gaze. “I know what I want, although I’m not quite sure how to describe everything I feel… when I’m with you and when I think about you. It’s… I know what it is, I’m pretty sure, but at the same time… I don’t.”

“It’s new for you,” you mumble. Surprisingly, he actually hears you and nods. He doesn’t lie. Not with you.

“I’ve been with many women over the years, all for the same reason. I’ve never felt like falling in love or that it would ever matter. I know lust, I know what comes with that. With you, it’s anything but. At first, yes. But your immediate rejection, you continuing to keep your distance from me and your distaste known made me stop and think.”

You raise your brows. “All it took was a girl with some strong boundaries to make you realize you can’t live off being just horny for then rest of your life?”

Sukuna laughs. He actually laughs. A bright smile crosses his handsome face as his shoulders shake with laughter. He tries to cover it up with a hand, but all it does it muffle it into loud chuckles. It takes a good couple minutes before his chuckles finally fall into a simple smile of amusement. That’s when you admit your own truths. If you were going to be hurt, you might as well get it over with.

“In a way,” Sukuna admits. And then he admits even more, opening his heart and putting it on his sleeve. “You’ve reminded me that there is more to life, that I can be genuinely happy beyond office walls and red light districts. You have made me remember what feeling excited, what being on my toes feels like. You make the air lighter… happier, every time I see you. You… I care for you.”

Sukuna’s last words of admission are watered-down and you both know it. Then again, he says he is new to these kinds of feelings. And at this point, you believe him. You wonder if he knows that you’re just like him — exactly the same: that you’re new to the feelings of love, what it means to be in love. It’s confusing, really. You’re not sure where to begin when it comes to saying the things that Sukuna has seemingly had no problem admitting to you. You can’t just say, “Ditto” and make out with him.

Well, you could, but that’s beside the point.

You swallow the frog in your throat and look at him. He isn’t looking at you but at the ground, almost like he’s unsure of himself.

“You’ve made yourself a cozy place inside me, too,” you speak softly. Your hands don’t leave the mug as you set it on the counter. “We’ve only known each other for barely half a year, you know? You make me wonder if what I’m feeling is love, most of the time. I enjoy you; I enjoy your company. I enjoy the thrill you bring into my life. I… enjoy how weightless you make the world feel. I… I like the thought of being… prioritized. I’m just… confused on whether or not these feelings are rooted in love or something else entirely.”

“And I apologize for making you feel that way,” he replies. “That isn’t my intention.”

You’re quick to your words before he can continue. “Don’t apologize. Please. It’s not your fault. I… I’ve never been in a relationship. I don’t know what love is or what it’s supposed to feel like. I’ve never been loved, and I’m not quite sure how to reciprocate it. I’m afraid I’ll fuck up. Say the wrong thing, not do something right.”

Sukuna’s brows furrow. “There is no right or wrong way to be in a relationship — just yourself.”

“I’ve heard that, just as much as I’ve heard otherwise.”

Silence fills your apartment. You tap your nails against the glass mug, little tinks! resounding. You can’t look at Sukuna now. Not after just admitting to having never been in a romantic relationship. Now, you must seem more of your age than you ever have in his eyes.

“Any insecurity you have is not invalid. I would never disrespect them,” Sukuna finally says, sheer conviction making you shiver.

The giant man stands to take his place not even a foot from you. Magnetism draws you to his face and you cannot look away. His hand comes up and brushes his large fingers across your cheek.

And like an open book, he reads you from the front cover to the very last word, reading off your exterior cover and the interior pages you’ve hidden away. “You’ve carved yourself from early maturity, into someone that your loved ones have needed you to be. You’ve never been able to truly be yourself, be free. You’ve always had to be the rock that everyone has needed, when no one has been for you. You desire to be loved, but not at the expense of heartbreak nor sacrificing the person you’ve molded yourself into for the people you love. You desire to be free above all else, not wanting to be loved unless there’s someone who can love you and give you your freedom at the same time.”

You gape, eyes almost as wide as saucers with your eyelids lined with burning tears. You dip your head and sniffle.

“I want that. I want that for you. I want to be the one to give that to you,” Sukuna continues. “The time we spent together not even a week ago, I want more of that. I no longer want to live the way I’ve been living. I want to live with you, do those kinds of things with you. That sounds corny as fuck coming from me of all people, but that’s the truth.”

You can’t help but laugh. His tone of exasperation at himself was just too funny not to.

“And what happens when you give me those things? Will you be done with me? Move on to the next person?” you ask. “Once you’ve played the part of the savior, won’t those feelings end?”

“I’ll never be done with you,” he answers instantaneously, like it was nothing short of law. “You’ve captivated me, all of me. I’ve already tried pulling myself away a multitude of times. But then one little word of anything about you and you’re all I think about for the rest of the day.”

You sniffle again and laugh. “Did you practice this? You sound like a poet.”

“I can be one if you’d like.” You giggle at that. It’s silly, but you feel like Sukuna would oblige you if you said yes. “But I mean it, every word.”

You nod and whisper, “I know you do.” Because it’s the truth. He’ll never not mean anything he says. Brutal honesty is apart of Sukuna.

The emptiness of your apartment is deafening, it’s silence almost palpable to the point where you feel like you might being to suffocate. But large, firm hands cup your cheeks and bring oxygen into your lungs again.

His hands are warm, so warm. The feeling of being touched like this, so intimately, makes all the blood flow to your cheeks to the point where you think you’ll overheat.

“May I kiss you?” he asks, tone quiet, voice deep and baritone that makes shivers roll up your spine. “At least once?”

You can’t help but bite into your lower lip. The suffocating feeling has returned, just for a different reason. But your instinct goes first — action taking the initiative over the brain — and you nod once more, mumbling out a small “yes” that you chastise yourself for being so meek.

Sukuna’s free arm wraps around your waist and gently pulls you to your tippy-toes. You’re running on instinct, one hand resting on his chest, the other circling behind his neck, eyelids slowly closing as he dives in for the kiss you’ve allowed. And when his hand cradles the back of your head, his lips meet yours, and you swear to everything from heaven to hell that you’re about to explode and die in this man’s arms.

Everything feels like it’s on fire… until it doesn’t. That fire slowly simmers down to a gentle flame, one that brings a sense of contentment.

Sukuna tilts his head, moving your lips and deepening the kiss. You allow it, and it feels like the kiss has sunk to a new depth of desire. Dare you even think or say it be devotion. His lips are warm and sweet on yours; his kiss isn’t one of urgency, but perhaps the desperation of longing. It’s not slow and controlling, not greedy. Whatever this kiss is and all the emotions contained within, you know it makes you at peace and content.

Everything feels perfect.

You both part for air, lips slow to disconnect. You can’t help but feel slightly embarrassed being so out of breath, but hearing the slight heaviness of breath coming from the large man makes you feel less awkward.

“Thought you said you hadn’t been in a relationship before?”

Your reply is breathless, “Never have.”

“Then you must be a naturally good kisser.”

That makes you laugh. You press your head to his chest and giggle away, to which you hear what you think is a chuckle from his throat.

It’s 11:20 at night by the time you look at the clock again. It’s too late for Sukuna to go home. That’s the excuse you use anyway. He’s seemingly more than happy to use the excuse right along with you to spend a night with you.

Come morning, however, things shift back to the way they were before: confusing and lonely. The couch was just as empty as the apartment. Under you was not Sukuna’s body, but a stack of pillows from your bedroom.

The note on the counter about being called in for an important meeting doesn’t do his absence justice either, instead sending every one of your walls back up, twice as high and just as thick as they were before.

Your phone dings with new messages. Utahime and Shoko, both of which declare they’re coming over to drag your ass out of your apartment to go shopping like you should’ve yesterday.

You text them back, telling them you’ll meet them at the mall, that you’re going to get ready and this time you aren’t going to miss out.

You don’t know what to do or what to think. You don’t know if one night of vulnerability means anything more than just being open with another human being. All you know is that you need a break, from yourself, your confusion, from life, and especially from Sukuna.

You need the clarity of a shopping trip and good friends for company, because your hopes for what’s coming next are getting far too high and you’re beginning to really fall in love with Sukuna Ryomen.

taglist: (no longer adding)

@vagabond-umlaut | @poe-daydreams | @heresan @thedovahqueen | @lotus-n-l0ve | @chiyoso | @miraclecherryblossomsblog | @unbreakableblueheaven | @marscatbutler | @vanillabloo | @wo-ming-bai | @visionsofmagic | @tohsri | @yuujispinkhair | @lilacliliess | @bub-ss

[sinsandsweetness]

Please for the love of god write something about Rick chasing the reader down in the woods I’d DIE

(Rick and Daryl x fem!reader)

cw- reader already has a baby with the boys, reader being chased in a maze, threesome, smut, slight breeding kink… think that’s all…

notes- happy Halloween! This is a fun little one shot placed in Alexandria. It is a follow up of “taking turns” however you don’t need to read it to read this. It’s just the same relationship, a couple years later. I had a few requests for a follow up and for some chasing/hunting vibes so… here you go! I won’t lie this is a bit rushed and not proofread at all so I apologize for any errors or if it’s not my best… but i hope you enjoy and tell me what you think<3

“Alright,” Rick breathes out with a sigh, dropping the large box onto the ground. Daryl right behind him with another.

The kids run over. Judith, at just 4 years old, Gracie, Sam, Carl and a few of the older kids and teens in Alexandria. Your own baby coos in your arms. Incoherent, yet adorable babbles leave her mouth, with chubby little hands grabbing into the air in the direction of her daddy.

While Rick cuts open the cardboard box of costumes, Daryl sneaks away from the cluster of children, all way too excited to get their hands on a cape and a mask. Or a dress and a tiara.

“C’mhere, sweetheart,” he grabs your daughter from your arms. Immediately she’s smiling all big and giggling into his jacket.

“Were you good for your mama while I was gone?” He whispers against her dark curls before pressing a kiss to her head.

“She just missed you, I think.” You respond. In reality, she was fussy. You figured that would happen after two nights without her dad. Daryl definitely being her favourite parent.

The kids are noisy as they ooh and awe and fight over the Halloween costumes.

Rick finally makes his own escape with a costume cowboy hat on his head.

“Hey, officer,” you tip your head up for a kiss as he wraps his arms around your waist. Eager to hug you. To touch you.

He stays holding you for a moment. Just soaking in your warmth.

“Miss me?”

“Every minute.” He confirms against your mouth for one last kiss, before moving to kiss your daughters cheek.

“How’s our little princess?” He asks to no one in particular.

“She missed her daddies. Kept me up all night.”

“What?” Rick faked a shocked tone, “our little princess would never. That doesn’t sound like her at all, does it?” He runs his hand over her hair and plants a kiss on her head.

You roll your eyes but your smile peaks out anyway. The sight of your men being such good fathers will never fail to make you smile.

“Daddy! Daddy look!” Judith’s high pitched voice brings attention as she tugs at Ricks pant leg.

When the three of you turn to look, she’s dressed in a unicorn onesie. Adorable. A bit warm for the weather. But adorable.

Rick picks her up with a groan, “oh my goodness, almost too big for this, aren’t you?”

She nuzzles into Ricks chest, little arms wrapping around his neck.

“I think someone needs a little snooze before all the festivities tonight, hm? You feelin’ a little tired, Judy?” He asks her. You don’t hear anything but you see the white fluffy ears on her hood move up and down as she nods into her fathers shirt.

“This little rascal should have one too.” You nod towards your own sleepy girl, “I can go put em’ both down for a nap.”

“Nah, I’ll do it.” Daryl insists.

“Are you sure-“

“I’ve got it.” He scoops Judith up in one arm, balanced on his hip and very happy to be carried to bed. A snuggly little 6 month old on his other. He starts off upstairs and leaves you and Rick in the living room. Surrounded by a foam sword fight battle that appears to have ensued between a couple ninja turtles and a fairy Princess.

The whole reason for Rick and Daryl’s last run was to find these costumes. Among other Halloween decorations and as much candy as they could salvage. Anything to make it a special day. To show the kids what things used to be like. To remind the ones who did know, exactly how fun the holidays were. You weren’t even sure it was Halloween. Sure, the leaves were beautiful tones of orange and yellow, falling to the ground and crunching beneath your shoes. But you arent sure what day it was. Honestly, you arent entirely sure what month it is. However, according to Eugene’s calendar, It is in fact the 31st of October.

Ricks head tips low to your ear and he whispers an invitation to go shower. He needs to clean up. And he really wouldn’t mind some company.

“Carol,” he turns for a moment and nods to her in the kitchen, prepping some food for tonight. “Can you…” he motions to the living room full of children running around. Carol nods and you can hear her telling them to beat it and go play outside while you’re led up the stairs by the hand.

—

The party is supposed to start at 7. Carol offered to take your daughter for the night, to give you some time off. To have fun. To go to sleep early if that’s what you wanted.

It’s a bit cold out. So you’re in a cream knit sweater and some jeans. A pair of cheap bunny ears are on your head. Your daughter is dressed in the smallest costume you could find in the box, a plush orange carrot. And she’s the cutest carrot you’ve ever seen, that’s for sure.

There’s wine. Lots. And food. And candy. Eugene is setting up a spooky film to be played on a projecter in the middle of Alexandria. A few bonfires surround the yard, scattered with jack-o-lanterns. Carved and lit up with tea lights and glowing eyes.

It’s beautiful. Slightly spooky. And so familiar. It’s everything you remember about Halloween.

An arm snaking around your waist startles you as you sip on your wine. But the smell of smoke and leather soothes you quickly.

“Hey,” Daryl says. You turn to face him, only slightly confused as his voice is being muffled by something.

He’s wearing a mask. A scream mask more specifically. The rest of his attire is typical. His leather jacket on, though no vest tonight. Dark jeans and boots.

“Mmm, spooky.” You lean in and press a quick peck to the white plastic. You can’t see him smile under the mask, but you know it’s there.

Another arm wraps around your waist from the other side. It’s Rick. You know by the thick brown jacket brushing against you. He’s also in costume, wearing a Friday the 13th hockey mask.

“Well hello, Jason,” you tease.

“You scared yet?”

“Should I be?” You ask. Though you’re pretty sure you know the answer.

Rick opens his mouth to respond but is interrupted by some commotion from the yard.

Eugene has a microphone, standing on a picnic table and telling the crowd to sit down and get comfy. That the movie will be starting in two minutes.

“Well, are you two ready for some Hocus Pocus?” You ask.

They look at eachother through the masks. What the hell are they plotting?

“What…?” You finally ask.

“We were thinking… maybe we could do something a little different.”

“What, you wanna watch something else?”

“Not quite,” Daryl chimes in, “we were thinking that while everyone is watching the movie, the three of us can make our way through the corn maze.”

The maze is outside the walls of Alexandria. A bit dangerous, but it was part of the fun. The kids had all had their turns in it earlier in the day, heavily supervised by adults and parents. Ones with weapons and training for situations outside the safety of the walls.

“You want us to all get lost in the maze?” You bite your bottom lip and smile.

“We want you to get lost in the maze,” Daryl corrects you.

Rick dips down to your ear and lowers his voice, “and we’ll try and find you. Play a little game.”

“Grown up hide and seek?” You ask. Heat raising to your cheeks at the thought of what they want to do once they find you.

“Exactly.”

You swallow, looking back to the yard where the kids are all lid out in sleeping bags and on blankets. Focused on the film playing in the dark.

“Ok.”

“We’ll give you a two minute head start,” Rick hands you a switch blade. Just incase. Nodding towards the back fence, where you know you can sneak out without being caught. Your heart is already starting to race a little at the thought of having to hide. At the thought of them searching for you. Hunting you down. And Daryl’s little comment when you start off towards the fence doesn’t help either,

“Good luck, little bunny.”

—

It’s pitch black when you reach the maze. Actually, as soon as you made it over the wall and into the woods, it was dark. But inside the maze, the stalks of corn all towering over 10 feet tall and fluttering creepily in the breeze. The only light you can see is a faint glow from the moon. And even then, it’s only when you’re out of the shadows.

You walk into the maze. Immediately met by multiple twists and turns. You weren’t one of the supervisors earlier, so you really didn’t know the route. The straw and leaves crunch under your feet as you walk further into the maze. A quick, brisk walk trying to find the best place to hide. Or, if you’re lucky, to find the end of the maze before the boys even get in.

But you know that’s unrealistic. And you’re sure your two minutes must be up because you can hear them. Footsteps and muffled voices behind a couple walls of corn. Shit.

You start to walk faster. A borderline jog at this point, trying to keep your footing light.

It didn’t occur to you until now how easy it’ll be for them to find you. Daryl’s a hunter for Christ sake. He’ll be able to track your path through the maze in no time.

They’re closer.

Fuck.

You have to run. You can hear their voices. They’re so close.

“You’re gonna have to be quicker than that, baby.” Ricks voice rings out towards you. He’s on the other side of the wall. Through the thick corn stalks and the pitch black of the night, you can’t make out exactly where he is. But he’s close.

You run.

And they follow right after.

The sound of their footsteps is clearer and clearer the further away from Alexandria you get. And the further into the maze.

You shriek at the feeling of a hand on your sweater, jolting forward and starting to sprint. It was Daryl. He’s behind you.

And though him and Rick are both stronger, you have one advantage. You’re faster.

Over your shoulder as you sprint you can see them. White masks still on, glowing in the moonlight.

“Fuck”, you swear to yourself when you

come to a dead end. You only have two options. Turn around, or be caught. They couldn’t be more than a few seconds away.

Without really thinking, you shove your way through the stalks. Catching on every leaf and stick, but ultimately coming out the other side without a scrape.

You can’t celebrate your quick thinking victory too long because you still hear them.

“Split up,” Daryl whisper shouts at his friend, and with their footsteps scattered, it’s even harder to tell where they are.

Fuck.

You keep going. You take a left. And then a right and another dead end. Shit. Is this … is this the same one?

You turn back and take the left instead. But it’s another dead end.

What the fuck?

You’re lost. You don’t even know what direction you came from anymore. Circling the same two dead ends before you finally take a right that leads you a couple meters further than the other options.

You hear a stick crack on the ground behind you, but there’s no time to see who it is.

You turn the corner fast with your heartbeat so loud it drums in your ears.

“Shit,” you stumble right into a brown jacket in front of you. Arms wrapping around you and picking you up. You scream.

Someone warm presses against your back as your feet touch the floor again.

You’re trapped.

“Gotcha,” Daryl’s gravelly voice is already in your ear.

You’re breathing heavy in their hold, sandwiched between the two men.

Their hands grab at your sweater and start to roam.

“Take this off,” a voice demands as you struggle against their arms,

You try for a moment to reach the mask covering Ricks face. But Daryl, or maybe Rick’s, hands are clamped on your wrist.

It’s claustrophobic, but you don’t entirely mind. As long as it’s their arms your trapped between, you’ll never complain.

They don’t kiss you. They can’t. But everything about their demeanour is screaming that they want you. That they want to be in you.

Hands gripping and tugging at your jeans. Your hands snake around Ricks neck in front of you as they peel your jeans down your legs. The air is cold and gives you goosebumps, but your legs wrap around his waist immediately. Daryl’s bulge pokes at your ass while his hand trails under your sweater to pinch your nipple. Ricks pants are tight as his own bulge rubs against the thin fabric of your panties. Your jeans long lost to the straw and dirt ground underneath you.

It doesn’t take long for them to get you how they need you.

Granted, the three of you did have a lot of practice. Your panties swiftly ripped off by the man behind you who wanted more access. The cold metal of both their belts hit your skin.

And with little preparation other than some spit and arousal, you’re stretched to the max with both men. Both holes filled with very little regard for your comfort.

They know you’d say something if it really hurt.

But it hurts so good. The pain of being so fucking full. Stretched to a limit you’d experienced over a dozen times, but no matter what, it just never gets any easier.

“Wanna kiss you,” your voice comes out in wet gasps, lips brushing the plastic of Ricks mask. One hand trying for Daryl’s hood, reaching awkwardly around. You need their touch. Their lips on your lips. Tongues tracing each-other and fighting for dominance.

They’d win.

They always do.

The three of you find a rhythm quickly. Hands on your thighs, holding you up and using you as leverage to pound as fast and hard as they could. Your moans and their grunts fill the air as pleasure starts to swirl low on your abdomen.

“Please,” your head tips back in ecstasy. “Please, please,”

“Please what, sweet girl?” The cold plastic of Daryl’s mask brushes your ear.

“Please- want- uh,” you’re interrupted by sharper thrusts from the two men, catching you off guard. Their both picking up their pace.

“Speak up, darling.” Rick demands, nails digging into your hips.

“Fill me up,” you gasp again. “Want it so bad, Rick, please.”

You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to focus on the swirl in your stomach. The one that keeps getting warmer and warmer and warmer until-

“I’m cumming,” you tell them as a courtesy, but you don’t have to. The way you’re involuntarily clenching down around them gives you away far better than a couple raspy words.

“You really wanna get filled up, baby? Bred like the little bunny you are, huh?” Ricks words send you over the edge and a hand toys at the fluffy rabbit ears that are shockingly still secured on top of your head.

You’re out of words. Too stimulated to talk. So you just nod in agreement. Yes. Please. Please.

Their hips stutter to a stop and warm liquid seeps out to drool down your inner thigh.

Breathing heavy, you’re lowered back to the ground, colder now. without the friction of their bodies.

“Here,” Daryl grabs your jeans from the ground and dresses you again. His soft side peaking out now that he’s had his release. Your shoes are back on and your legs a little shaky, and finally, the boys finally take their masks off. The whites of their eyes are bright in the moonlight.

“You alright?” They both ask you as the three of you somehow manage to find your way back out of the maze.

“A little cold…” you smirk.

“But we didn’t-we didn’t scare you too bad right?”

“No.” You smile, “Don’t know if I could ever get that scared by you too love bugs.” You tease, arms wrapping around their waists and pulling them in close to you.

“Pfft,” Daryl brushes off the comment and Rick only smiles.

“Well if we didn’t scare you, then maybe next time we oughta try a little harder.”

“Next time?” You ask. The thought already going straight between your thighs.

The boys share a look over your shoulders that can only mean one thing.

“Hey, baby,” Rick catches your attention, hand guiding you towards the community gates by the small of your back as he searches in his jacket pocket for his keys. “You ever been to a house of mirrors?”

[erosjournal]

*checks the date* oh oct 11 already passed. in honor of national coming out day, we now have my argos 2 queer headcanons (in my au-ish)! i already posted something similar but here u go!

percy jackson

cisgender guy, but breaks gender norms/hj 💪

he/him (they/them r fine but he answers he/him when asked)

bi with a fem leaning. (i believe luke was his gay awakening. i dont ship them, but like nico and percy, yk?)

dating annabeth :)

annabeth chase

cisgender girl, but also breaks gender norms

she/her (also okay w/ they/them)

pan ! (i believe she likes people purely based on their personality and their intelligence, not on gender)

demiromantic (like how her crush on percy developed, and sorta w/ luke)

dating percy

jason grace

cis guy (he has slight internal “toxic/fragile” masculinity bc hes struggled to be the male leader people expect him to to be tho :/)

he/him

bi with a fem leaning (takes him a while to realize bc be thought he had to like girls… until percy/leo came along 👀)

either dating or crushing on leo (i say either bc u can interpret it as you please. personally, i ship valgrace so yea)

piper mclean

gender non-conforming / demigirl ! (she feels relatively feminine, genderwise not expression, but not fully)

she/they (he/him is eh, they prefer not to use he/him)

queer (mostly attracted to females, but some men slip in. she prefers queer and to not label their sexuality)

expresses their gender fluidly (some days masc, some days fem, some androgynous. she also enjoys shorter hair)

dating or crushing on reyna :)

leo valdez

masculinely gender non-conforming as well (he is mostly masculine, but doesnt think cis male is the best label for his gender. he’s not gender queer though)

he/him (they/them is fine as well, but NO she/her)

poly ! (not polyamorous 😭 basically, he’s attracted to mainly guys and girls with no preference in there)

dating or crushing on jason

hazel levesque

cis girl (even though shes cis, she is now the biggest ally in the 21st century. after learning abt it from nico, she wanted others to feel safe as she did now that there wasn’t as physical racism, idk if that makes sense but whatever)

she/her (i mean, technically they/them is fine but like, she doesn’t introduce herself with them… yk?)

straight and ace (no, shes not ace just bc shes 13-14 yall, people stay ace)

dating frank !

frank zhang

cis guy (same as jason, has a lot of internal “toxic/fragile” masculinity since he was never a super buff and leader typa guy)

he/him

straight and ace as well :)

(btw, his body never physically changes !! )

dating hazel :)

bonus !

nico di angelo

demiboy (or trans masc, or cis. there is no in between)

he/him (they/them r fine as well)

gay (idk what else to say man)

dating will

reyna avila ramirez-arellano

non-binary / gnc / gender queer (their genders more like: im not a girl, im not a guy, but other than that idgaf)

all pronouns (they/them is prefered, but they’re fine with she/her and he/him)

lesbian (into any non-men. idk wtf was going on w/ jason and… ig percy)

dresses very androgynously (lowkey always in armor anyways)

crushing doesnt feel like something reyna would do… but dating / ROMANTICALLY ADMIRING piper

(ALSO! I USE SHE/HER PRONOUNS ON MY OLD FICS FOR THEM, I WILL START USING SHE AND THEY :DD)

also guys, im not using this as an excuse to make all the pjo characters queer. this is just how i interpret and hc them in honor of coming out fay (oct 11) !!

[idrkwhatthisisimsorry]

Flying to Italy pt.1

Description: Y/N finds out her boyfriend is cheating on her with her best friend, and decides to take the trip she had planned with him to Italy anyways, but alone. But she meets Harry along the way, and so it goes... Does she decide to stay with Harry, or is it too soon and too fast? Or will she forgive her boyfriend? Only time will tell.

Warnings: angst, cheating

Word count: 1K

Masterlist

A/N: hey! I haven't written in a while, and I have never posted Harry on here, but I'm on a serious kick with him rn and I've been thinking of this idea for a few days and I really wanted to write it, so here y'all go! I hope you enjoy, it's gonna be really good. This takes place in about early 2019 btw! Not everything is gonna be totally correct timeline wise, so just pretend it is lol

"Hey, me and Lily are going to go out tonight, I don't think Colin can come, are you up for it?" Jackson, my boyfriend said. I've been dating Jackson for almost ten years. We've known each other since we were fifteen, and we've been dating since we were sixteen. He's my rock and my best friend. But not as much as Lily. She's been my number 1 since we were about five years old. She's been dating her boyfriend, Collin for about four years now, and little does she know, he's about to propose when we go on our Italy trip in a few days together. I'm a little jealous because Jackson hasn't gotten the balls to propose to me, but I couldn't be happier for my best friend.

"Uhhhh, I might come later, but don't count on me, I have a lot of catching up to do on work if I don't want to work while we're in Italy. You guys gonna be in the same place all night?" I tell him. Any normal girlfriend would be skeptical of their best friend and boyfriend hanging out without either of their partners, but I've known both of them for so long to know that they're just good friends. We were just a trio throughout high school and college until Lily finally met Collin, and if I had any skepticism, that was all thrown out the window after seeing the way her and Collin were together. I would go as far to say they're even cuter together than me and Jackson.

"Yeah, we're going to R bar. If you don't come, it's fine, babe, I'll just see you when I get home. Love you." He said, as he gave me a kiss on the cheek and walked out the door. "Love you." I said back, as he walked out.

...

I finished up enough of my work, and decided to go meet up with him at the bar. I quickly changed and did light makeup and got an uber.

I got to the bar and didn't see him or Lily with our group of friends. I walked over to one of them, "Hey have you guys seen Jackson? He said he and Lily were gonna be here with you guys tonight." I asked, still looking around the bar. "Uh, last I saw them was about ten minutes ago when he said they were gonna go get a drink from the bar, but I think I saw them walk off somewhere." Alex said, giving me a nervous face, which made me really nervous. I've never had reason to not trust him before, so I didn't expect what I was about to see and hear as I walked towards the bathrooms. I went into the women's restroom and didn't see Lily, and obviously I couldn't go into the mens, so I walked over to the single unisex bathroom door, and put my ear up to it. Someone was obviously having sex in there, very loud sex for that matter. I knocked, just in case my worst nightmare was coming true. "Busy!" A voice, very similar sounding to my best friend of twenty years, called out. I tested the door handle, and in their drunk idiocy they forgot to lock it, and I barged right in on my boyfriend fucking my best friend. Her small black dress, that she actually borrowed from me, hiked all the way up to her stomach, and his pants pulled down just low enough for him to be sticking his dick somewhere he shouldn't have.

The second he saw me, his eyes went wide and he immediately went wide and he pulled out of her and started to pull up his pants as quickly as possible. "Y/N-" "I don't want to hear it, Jack. The two people I thought would never hurt me. How long have you two been fucking behind my back?" I yelled angrily. "No no no no no, Y/N, this is the first time this has ever happened it was such a mistake, I'm so sorry, please, you're my best friend, I am so so sorry." Lily said, apologizing over and over again, as if those words could ever reverse her actions. I just stared at them in horror, tears threatening to spill over, my heart breaking as I knew I was losing the two people I cared about most in my life all in just five minutes. "Your sorry means nothing to me. I trusted both of you. I loved both of you, and you stabbed me in the back. I never want to see you again. Either of you. Might as well cancel your tickets to Italy once you're done fucking each other." I say, as I slam the door shut and leave the restaurant as fast as I possibly can and order an uber to the nearest hotel.

...

I sat in my expensive ass hotel room contemplating almost every single life decision I'd ever made. How long had this really been going on? Was it really the first time? How stupid have I been? And what was I going to do about Italy? Where was I going to live? My brain was going a hundred miles a minute, while I just sat there crying in my short little dress I wore to the bar. For him. Because I knew how much he loved that dress. Loved. He didn't have the right to love anything about me anymore.

I was so excited for everything in the future. We were supposed to spend a whole month in Italy together, the four of us. I was so so excited. I never got to travel ever, my family never had enough money, and then I went to college, and then I had to work my way up in my career to have money and actually get time off. Jackson and Lily have both been to Italy before, so it's not like this is some huge new experience that they're going to miss out on.

I laid on that bed for hours just crying, and thinking about what to do. I was going to go to Italy and forget all about people that never deserved me.

[madstronaut]

tis christmas in july aka the season for feasting year-round 

much like the 3-in-1 monstrosity of shampoo/condish/bodywash that the COD men probably use (not gaz, though he would n e v e r) I am tossing in my ramblimmentaries three of cin’s lovely fics together here 🥰

aaanyway not even ashamed to say I’ve been re-reading their holiday keegan fic SEVERAL TIMES a month since I first saw it last december cos it’s so cute and fluffy

ok I need to get this out of the way laughing my ass off rn because autocorrect changed cumikering to cucumber several times throughout here and i was howling when I went to edit this and I was like why are there cucumbers everywhere??? LMAO

Reading: Neighbour Keegan Russ x reader by @cumikering

ah meet cute at the laundry room; I love it alr (as you can see i am easily pleased/amused/moved)

also it’s already on sight with reader’s cuz, i have unfortunately met ppl like this IRL (haven’t we all) and well talk about telling on themselves about how unhappy they are :/

“Well, if you need company…” he said, trying to not sound too hopeful. I’d love to spend some time with you. You turned to him, brow raised. “Wait, you mean, you want to come with? Be my plus one?” “That wasn’t- well, yeah. I can do that.” He shrugged. “If you want.” This wasn’t the direction he was heading for. He was going to offer to spend Christmas together, maybe exchange gifts, but he surely wasn’t going to take that back. Anything for a chance with you.

AAAA OBSESSED WITH HOW CUTE AND AWKWARD THIS WHOLE EXCHANGE IS

He always enjoyed seeing your face brighten like that, despite never getting the chance to see it enough…But between deployments, he was lucky to even catch a glimpse of you once a week, leaving any possible advances towards you simply a fantasy to him. He was out of practice, but was he that out of practice that he came on too strong and scared you? He certainly didn’t mean to make it suggestive. This was going to end before it even started. He grimaced to himself.

we love some good ole mutual pining🥺🥰🥺🥰🥺🥰

That time you saw Keegan on a run shirtless out your window you had to sit down.

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA crying laughing at this…also reminded me of a time I hung out with a friend in LA who went to pick up a friend after he ran a marathon and drop him off before we went to dinner - didn’t realize the runner was an old acquaintance I hadn’t seen in a while since he was a senior when I was a freshman in college but I fucking remembered him alright when he came running up ripped af, shirtless, sweaty, saw me and went “MADSTRONAAUUTTTT OMG” and picked me up and spun me while in his giant hulking sweaty arms and I briefly bluescreened…anyway cough sorry back to keegan what was I saying, yes shirtless sweaty keegan yes yes 

He didn’t speak much (you wished he did though because his voice was divine)

my fellow voicekink brian bloom fans where you at

ah wooing by fake dating, is there a better trope (tbh the ones I’ve read are hit or miss but this one is 10/10)

Keegan sat on his bed as you went through his wardrobe. How cheesy would it be if he were to pull out his guitar and serenade you? He, too, was told the ladies liked men who played the guitar. Why do you think he picked it up in high school?

*thousand eyed stare thinking of how many times I've heard wonderwall as a millenial*

He’d made it his mission to make sure taking him to your family was worth your while.

ah yes a true soldier through and throughhhhh~

You were a steady stream of glee that didn’t drain him and he couldn’t get enough.

AAWWWWWWW fucking loved this line!!!!!!!

also the cousin’s name as Bella now has me picturing her as twilight kristen stewart

It only made it hard to dilute your hopefulness that this meant the slightest bit more than nothing.

“dilute your hopefulness” GAAHHH LOVE THIS PHRASE CIN MWAH MWAH

now how to put this lightly but everything about bella just filled me with pure rage lol first off I WOULD ALSO KILL FOR A DYSON AIR WRAP GIFTED TO ME (can I buy one? yes. can I justify buying one? hell no) and I hate to use this term but textbook definition of a ‘pick-me girl’ right here but seeing casual cruelty like this would make me hear those kill bill sirens and have me swabbing some vaseline on my face and taking my earrings off and spitting some razorblades out my mouth and- cough anyway that’s from my younger fanciful days, I don’t carry razorblades in my mouth this isn’t late 90s/early 2000s new york ha cough anyway moving on smh throwing my hands at bella up in air

but I loved the contrast with keegan and let me just say everything about bella’s ‘gift’ goes against the pure nature of giftgiving and I am thrilled that she left the card there but got to take Keegan home 🥰

this whole fic reminded me of a lovely quote I read on a tear-off daily calendar lol

“The wise one knows. The giver of the gift IS the gift. And the gift is just the giver’s heart in the shape of something to make you smile.  The gift decays. The giver stays. And so the real gift remains.”

I will make an exception for celebrating Christmas in July for any of cin's holiday fics 🥰🥰🥰

-----------------------------------------

aaaaand also reading: by Ghost x plus-sized reader by cinny

omfg fucking tearing up my pillows to shreds at how much I love this lil fic!!!

You scoffed, looking past him at the other ladies in the room. “Are you serious? There are plenty who weigh far less.” His brow rose. “Are you calling me weak?”

fucking love reading about a suave smooth-ass ghost

His eyes softened a touch. “May I? Please?”

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 WHO CAN RESIST PUPPY EYED GHOST??? TELL ME WHO

 Across the pub, the table of three men grinned at the massive stranger. The one with the mohawk was very much entertained as he gave him thumbs up.

yes yes we love wingman!141

You laughed, your breath warm against his ear. “Are you going to set me down or am I having my drink on your back?” “Don’t give me ideas.” He chuckled as he lowered you to your feet.

HOW CUTE IS SIMON CARRYING READER TO THE BAR? AAAAAAA

“Okay. Well, thanks for he drink. You could get back to your mates if you want.” “I’m Simon,” he mustered instead.

“he mustered” AAAH I LOVE BIG NERVOUS MEN STUMBLING OVER THEIR WORDS

When he turned to them, they immediately busied themselves with their drinks, averting their gazes.

LMAO

So that was why you were alone. You were waiting for someone. Disappointment anchored at the bottom of his chest. “Right. Okay.” You smiled. “Thanks for the drink, Simon. I’ll see you around, yeah?” He grunted and you headed to the end of the bar. He stood umoving for another second before retreating to his table like a kicked puppy.

ummm omg I literally keeled over and slumped out of my chair in sympathy for simon for a good minute before I could read on OMG CIN HOW COULD YOU (lmao jk I loved this sm)

You flagged down some other blond man who walked over to you with a smile.

LMAO yes yes simon you are clearly superior

“I know she’s with someone, but I can tell she likes you more,” Price said, and Simon finally tore his gaze away from you. “Ye should fight ‘im, L.T. He dinnae stand a fuckin’ chance.” “You can knock him out with a slap,” Gaz quipped.

fucking love this, cin has 141 characterisation down to a T with each of their responses!!!! 

also men of the world if you can please take notes on stepping up from 141 here, please start doing so yesterday tyvm

so busy mopping up my heart from melting at how adorable this meet-cute is and I also got halal two days in a row from the halal guys cart by work thanks to reading about the kebabs in this fic

-----------------------------------------

and finally reading: Ghost x asmr artist reader by cinny

"Simon had a pepper problem and a pasta dilemma"

🥺🥺🥺🥺 I am dying at the cuteness here alr🥺🥺🥺🥺

You turned to him. He noticed the little startle before you shoved your phone back in your pocket.

men who are self-aware of their size and presence and the effect it has on ppl around them and act accordingly, I love you

Your quiet cooking videos were one of the only things left that offered him calmness, especially on those nights away on missions, giving him tingles in all the right places, and shamefully, the wrong ones too sometimes.

sir, sir, there is no room for shame in love~

“Ah- I’m sorry,“ he managed, flustered by your sudden exit. “I didn’t want to be presumptuous, but you make those videos, don’t you? I recognised your voice.” You grinned, turning to him. “I just wanted to thank you,” he said. “Your videos comfort me a lot.” “I’m happy to hear. Thank you for watching.” Simon wanted to tug his beanie over his face because as you walked away, he was unmoving with a racing heart and a blush over his pale cheeks.

omfg WANTED TO TUG HIS BEANIE DOWN??? I AM IN LOVE I LOVE STRONG YET VULNERABLE GIANT MEN SM (this is a fluff fic so I am keeping with the fluffy vibes nd restraining my horny ass from choking out some absolutely thirsty comments here)

Despite the uncomfortable circumstances, your quiet yet crisp voice always sent him into a restful slumber.

yes shoutout to my favorite YT vids and comfort fics for putting me to sleep without fail

The chance encounter only fuelled his attraction. Knowing the kind smile behind the sweetest voice felt like an intimate secret, one you shared with him and only him - not with the rest of your few thousand subscribers.

i love how sweet simon is here with his lil parasocial crush and OMG WHEN READER APPROACHES HIM FIRST IN THE PASTA AISLE I also blushed IRL GOD I LOve FLUFF FICS SM

“Someone sent in a recipe for a video, and it’s absolutely delicious. I’ve been making it at least once a month ever since.”

SIMON’S COMFORT YOUTUBER’S COMFORT RECIPE IS SIMON'S??? WHAT IS THIS GLORIOUS OUROBOROS OF A COINKYDINK

He combed his hair back with his fingers, hoping his hat hair wasn’t terrible. He caught the double take you did at his tattooed arm.

🥰hehehe i love these little tidbits and morsels of vulnerability (hmm good band name, writing that down)

The rich scent of caramelised meat drifting in the room wrapped around him like a warm blanket.

Between sips of tea, you enjoyed your own halves of the chocolate wordlessly, the music melting into the background.

The savoury aroma glided past the thin gaps of the oven, swirling and dancing between you and him.

mmmmmm this has to be one of the coziest fics ive ever read

“I was an apprentice butcher before I enlisted.” He pressed down on the ricer with ease.

so much said in two sentences!!! ugh mwah mwah so many chef’s kisses for your writing style cinny

also loved how both are very self-aware and how reader picks up on simon talking about his mom in past tense and the whole fic emerging to fit around this bit of simon’s story is so wonderful to me… He waited until you took a bite before taking his own, and his breath caught. His brows furrowed as lump formed in his throat. Had the ground cracked and plunged him into a glitched universe? He was once more in Manchester, 10 years younger, finally home after a long day at the butcher, his mum and brother waiting at the table with the piping hot dish in the middle of it.

literally picturing that critic eating ratatouille flashback end scene from the eponymous movie 😂🥰

The last thing he wanted to do in front of you was shed a tear, but there he was, some hulking stranger sobbing on your shoulder as nostalgia held him in a death grip. It was humiliating to be seen like this – he didn’t remember the last time he cried from feelings, yet the tears wouldn’t cease despite his efforts. But you held him close, and his thick arms wrapped around you. He told himself if he pulled you close enough, it would hurt less.

i love how simon’s comfort streamer becomes an IRL comfort place for him to safely break down 🥹🥹 did I cry from reading this? IDK MAYBE WHO KNOWS? (looks at the ruined kleenex piled in my wastebin)

I hope all readers know and have a person and place like this (and may we host such places and become such people as well) 💛✨🌿

and of course I will pause my rambles here with a big-ass hug 🫂 and thank you to cinny for being a wonderful comfort fic writer for meeee 🫶🫶🫶😘👌😘👌😘👌

[deadboydetectives-confessions]

I'm the anon who doesn't read much fic anymore. Tbh I've shared a lot of my frustrations here already in other asks and gotten pushback, which makes me even less interested in reading DBD fic, because it just feels like I'm out of step with fandom everywhere: here, ao3, even other tumblr spots. I also submitted a long rambly ask that hasn't been published yet that was me kind of pre-mourning how I'm drifing out of the fandom because the vibes are just not working for me, which came up after I tried to find fic to read yesterday.

But since you asked, generally: I like long, plotty fic that doesn't sideline the women and I'm bored by short fluff, especially if it's very traditional romance vibes. I am invested in the queerplatonic-ness of the Edwin and Charles relationship and fics that sidestep that to center solely on traditional romance usually disappoint me.

The sidelining of the women is the first thing I ran up against in the fandom and is kind of my white whale. A lot of fics that do include Crystal, Niko, and the other female characters don't do them justice and flatten them: Crystal is mean. Niko is a shipper. They are foils for the boys to figure out their romance. It's nothing I haven't seen in other fandoms and there are definitely fics that do center them, but I think I've read them all.

I enjoy fics that try to engage with the world and fill out gaps in the show: exploring side characters like Kashi and Angie, for example. I also like when fic engages with key aspects of the show, like the fact that Charles and Edwin are ghosts and what that means for them. Or that they are dual-aged (old men and perpetual teens at the same time) and what that means. A lot of fic tries to get around what was established in the show, whereas, in general, for this fandom, I'm here because I like the show and want more of it. I'm not looking for anything that feels like a wild departure. My ideal would be lots of casefics, but that's often a hard find in any fandom.

I usually enjoy kink and smut, but gotta admit the NC-17 fics in this fandom have yet to hit for me. I prefer my smut to be based in what I think that character would find hot and the vibe I get is that the smut in this fandom is fueled on what the writer finds hot and then backtracking to try to make it work for the character. In some fandoms that backtracking works for me, but it hasn't worked for me yet in this fandom and often comes across to me as being wildly OOC and fanon. (Dom!Edwin: looking at you.) It doesn't help that I don't find either TCK or Monty sexually appealing. (Jenny on the other hand.) This fandom also just has weird puritan vibes even within smut fics that I can't put my finger on. It's like some fics are going "look at us being naughty and writing porn" when it's barely R and the kink is blink and you miss it.

Anyway tl;dr: I like long plotty fic that includes in a significant way or fully centers the ladies; engages thoughtfully with the premise show; and doesn't hew to traditional romance tropes. I've been successful at finding fics that hit one or two out of the three, but finding fics and authors that routinely work on all three levels has been hard.

.

[panelshowsource]

this is such a great episode!

for anyone who hasn't listened yet — it deals with some heavy things including food addiction and eating disorders, death, and more, so anyone who wants to check it out should be aware it's about richard's own history and his self-identified "failures", and it's not particularly light-hearted or funny even though it's endearing and inspiring in many ways

i really appreciate his honesty and how carefully he speaks. he has every right to be angry — with his father leaving, with his relationship to food and shame, with the ever-present confines of modern masculinity making life so lonely for men — but he never seems to be. he just cares about being the best, healthiest version of himself. and i appreciate that he doesn't talk at people, preach, act like he knows more or best; he just knows what he knows all while seeking to always be learning more. i really appreciate him!

i've never heard of a podcast by tailors, how interesting! i listened to the episode with alex and it was really sweet! i'll post this in case anyone else wants to check it out :)

(of course 💜)

same, i'd only really heard of it because i got a bunch of messages about it! (i was a little unplugged from scripted tv when the first series came out 😅)

TOTALLY AGREE about jon pointing! his comedic timing, his facial expressions, he is just too hilarious — even though...can i just say...why was that old ass man playing a uni student X_X

anyways — i knew him from plebs!! that's quite a famous itv2 series, so you should check it out and see if you like it! i love tom basden ugh and if you check my non-panel shows masterpost i have live at the moth club and he does standup in ep1!

i am somewhat familiar with it as someone who likes to watch some of the nextup specials (alistair barrie was one i enjoyed recently!) and tries to keep abreast of the festival nominees & winners, but i don't have as much time as i'd like to really weed out my favourites only because there isn't enough time in the day and i'm already trying to watch 100 things a day 🥲

one thing i find funny is how i pay more attention to who would do well on tv opposed to who is just GOOD. like, i didn't get john kearns until stopped thinking about him in the context of dictionary corner and started acknowledging his written set as a very, very specific piece of work that really shouldn't be disassembled and consumed in morsels. but i do see my interest in — and potentially my preference for — panel shows reflected in some of the circuit guys i like, such as alasdair beckett-king, huge davies, larry david. i just know they would kill panel show world if they were pushed properly :')

i find that i like standup a lot more live than i do on screen — which i think a lot of comedians would understand!

as well, i find the discourse about how difficult it is to get started/off the ground now that edinburgh fringe is becoming less and less accessible extremely fascinating and try to listen to all of the podcasts/convos about that that i can. it's costing comedians upwards of 5k just to debut a modest set at edinburgh — which is madness. here is tom mayhew talking to bbc news about this just a couple of weeks ago...

anyways, is there someone you wanted to recommend? i would love to check out anything 😚

—

daniel sloss standup — added a couple of those to drive! god i looooooved him when i was in high school and still do! highly recommend him on roast battle uk if you need extra sloss content. i'll work on the others over the next couple of weeks

alma's not normal — added to drive!

here we go — i know exactly where this is so i can hook you up but imma need you to dm/ask me off anon for the deets!

hold the front page + the unofficial science of home alone — sorry anons i don't have these on me but they're very easy requests someone can hook you up with on r/tv_bunny, so post them there!

—

PANEL SHOW WATCH LINKS / NON-PANEL SHOW WATCH LINKS FAQ / TAGS / ASK

[thegirlwiththeninjaturtletattoos]

Every Rose Has it's Thorn

-Part 1-

>Part 2

Universe: Teenage Mutant Teenage Turtles (Bayverse aged-up turtles)

Rating: NSFW, R for swearing mostly MINORS DNI

Raphael x OC (female character)

Tags: Trigger Warning- drugging, assault, violence, original character, slow burn romance

Hi! This is my first attempt at writing. I have been wanting to do an OC fic forever, and I was so completely inspired by @sultrysirens oc characters that I wanted to make my own (Seriously, go read their stuff it's amazing!). Anyways, the beginning is a bit dark and scary, but I'm so excited to continue the story. This series is centered around my original character, Rose.

Enjoy and let me know what you think!

-Rose had a shit day and heads to a local dive bar for a drink, only to soon realize her day is only going down from here.

------------------------------------------------------------------

“Fuck, that’s good.”

Rose Soriano took a swig of the drink that the bartender had slid to her across the lacquered bar top, gifted from some guy a bit down the counter. She raised her glass in thanks and gave an awkward half smile, appreciative for the second round but hoping he wouldn’t take her acceptance as an excuse to wander over.

She was wrong.

As she nursed the blended scotch in her glass, the tall white dude sauntered over and sat down.

“Hey, my name’s Mark. What’s a pretty girl like you doing here all by yourself?” The blonde spoke with a cocky smile plastered on his lips, brown eyes a little hazed with drink and oozing confidence. He looked nice enough; handsome in a boring way, not bad to look at- but just like every other 25 year old white guy in New York. If she had been interested in dating at the moment, Rose may have given him a shot in another life. But unfortunately for him, she was in no mood for this brand of bullshit tonight.

She had a shit day and just needed some time alone with her thoughts.

“Hi, yeah uh, thanks for the drink but-” She waved a delicate hand in his direction as she spoke, but he cut her off before she could finish her thought.

“What’s your name? Are you from around here?”

She rolled her eyes.

“Look man, thanks for the drink and all- but I’m really not interested.” Turning back to her scotch she tried to ignore the uncomfortable silence between them, and the bubbling frustration resonating off the young man pestering her.

“What, we can’t just have a conversation? Who said that I was trying to pick you up or anything, maybe I was just looking for some company.” He shifted in his seat, legs turning so he faced her as his tone turned sharp in the quiet space between them. “Now are you gunna tell me your name or what? Like I bought you a drink, the least you could do is tell me who you are.”

Sigh.

Of course things could never go the easy way, he just had to be difficult.

Rose shifted uncomfortably at the counter, her shoes dangling just above the foot rail as she perched on her stool. She was short, not even 5'4" with a petite and curvy hourglass frame that fit snugly on the seat. Her luscious mane of copper curls cascaded over her shoulders as she tensed into the counter, the blonde highlights peeking out from her bangs and glowing in the low bar lighting as her deep, emerald green eyes side-eyed the man sitting next to her.

After a lengthy internal debate, she decided giving her name would not kill her, and hunched further against the bar top as she answered him. 

“Name’s Rose. Nice to meet you.”

“See, was that so hard?” Mark sneered, making her outwardly cringe as she immediately regretted her decision. “So, why are you here by yourself? Boyfriend ditch you?” 

Rose snorted, eyes rolling as she looked back to her glass.

She was incredibly beautiful; she knew it, everywhere she went people knew it- she couldn’t escape it.

But after years of bad experiences with men she had a bad attitude and a big mouth, which usually led to them running off, tails between their legs, when they tried hitting on her in public like this. Normally she only went out with friends and would’ve told this man off in a heartbeat, but being alone at the bar, and after everything that happened today, she was left feeling a little vulnerable and less bold than usual.

She glared over her glass at him as he rested an arm on the bar top next to her. 

“That is honestly none of your business, and I would really prefer to be alone dude. Besides,” she turned to point out some young women giggling at the other end of the bar, “those girls seem way more your speed.”

As she turned back, she saw movement in her peripheral vision, but when she looked again at her surroundings nothing had appeared to have changed, so she dismissed it.

Mark flashed a cocky smile at her but seemed to take the bait.

“Aight, your loss. But if you change your mind I’ll be over there waiting, hot stuff.”

Giving a wink, he stood up from his seat and left Rose’s side to go chat with the young 21 year olds in the corner.

“Thank god that’s finally over. I thought he’d never get the hint.” She mumbled into her glass, finally relaxing again.

She took another hit of the scotch, and let her mind wander back to the events of the day.

Rose had come home from a gig to find her boyfriend of eight years in bed with another man, and while she was upset and hurt, she also didn’t know how to process the new information.

She felt guilty, mostly. She may have pushed him into the relationship when he wasn’t ready, and he had been stalling on proposing but wouldn’t give a reason why. With everything in the open now she felt like a weight had been lifted, that maybe she wasn’t unattractive- her boyfriend was just gay.

Shaking her head, she took another swig, wincing at the burn as it slid down her throat.

Her now ex-boyfriend had promised that he wouldn't be at their shared apartment tonight, so she could process what happened and make a plan on what to do next.

God, she hadn’t even called her brother yet. That was going to be an absolute nightmare of I-told-you-so’s. She had written off his comments about her relationship and ignored the signs: the lack of affection, the constant trips out of town, the hanging out with friends that she wasn’t invited to that would end up as overnighters.

Hell, she still loved Nick, but her heart ached for the both of them. How long was he suffering in silence about this, and why didn’t he just come out and talk to her? They had been friends before they started dating, and they were supposed to be a team, right?

Damn, this is a mess.

Her eyes were glued to the remaining liquor in her glass as she swirled the liquid around, the last of the melting ice cube clinking against the sides of the container.

A fucking mess.

Signaling the bartender, she paid her tab and finished the last of her drink.

Rose slid off the stool, and as she stepped towards the door, suddenly the room started to spin.

Did I drink that much?

Shit.

Desperately trying to regain control of her body, she took a deep breath and moved quickly on unsteady feet out the main entry doors for some fresh air.

Once outside, the cool September air whipped against her face as she adjusted to the darkness of the city street.

The lights from the bar's front entry were growing fuzzy around the edges, and she couldn't tell if it was from the panic in her throat or the hum of the liquor in her system.

Rose shook her head and quickly stepped into the quiet alley next the bar, trying to maintain her composure while methodically trying to retrace the night's events.

Luckily her apartment building was close by, but she wasn’t sure she could walk with how much everything was spinning out of control.

Two drinks?

Yes, they were strong. But two had never been an issue before.

Then it hit her.

“That FUCKER!”  

The arm movement that she dismissed earlier- he must have put some kind of roofie in her drink when she turned her head.

Remembering what she could about the drug, she immediately stuck her finger down her throat trying to ralph up anything she could muster. Cringing at the action, and hoping she wasn’t too late, she got up what she could and dug into her bag for her phone while stabilizing herself against the wall.

Just as she tried to hit the call button on the screen, her phone was smacked out of her hand and she felt a force knock the wind out of her, leaving her gasping for air and falling to the ground.

“ We can’t have you doing that, now can we? Not after how long I had to wait for you to finally get up and leave- you don’t want to be rude, right?”

Mark and another man that she hadn’t seen before were standing above her, smiling and laughing to themselves.

She was still present enough to know how much danger she was in, but could barely see straight enough to even stand up, let alone fight her way out of this.

Fuck.

Mark bent down to grab her hair at the scalp and forced her to look up at him. “Now, we’re going to all play nice, and as long as you behave you’ll be fine.”

With his last words she felt a knife press against her throat, the blade thick and sharp. There was a stinging sensation as blood was drawn where the point of the metal was stabbing into her skin. And she couldn't help the wince that curled the other man's lips up into a sneer. 

The other man flicked his eyes back to the alley entrance, and jutted his chin at Mark to head further into the darkness.

Her assailant yanked on her hair, in an attempt to drag her up on her feet and get her to comply. As she clumsily stood and took a few swaying steps with them, the knife left her skin and came to rest at his side, still a threat but no longer drawing blood.

Rose’s mind was swimming too much to think of a full plan, but she knew she had to do something.

No se saldrán con la suya sin pelear conmigo, malditos cabrones- I’d rather die.

An old saying from her Dad popped into her mind as she stumbled in Mark’s grip down the alley:

Lucha hasta el final, chaval; Go down swingin', kid.

Hearing movement somewhere nearby that wasn’t the two men, she made a decision.

Hopefully whoever was nearby would hear her and help. Or, at least she gave it her best shot- no regrets.

Gathering up her courage, she went for it. Rose knew she would have a few seconds, and she had to make them count.

Using what strength and focus she had left, she turned in Mark’s direction quicker than he could react and palm striked his nose. She felt the crunch of his cartilage in her hand right before he cursed loudly.

“WHAT THE FUCK BITCH!?!”

She had already started to turn and run, but her movements were slow due to the drug in her system.

Giving everything she had, she screamed.

“HELP, SOMEONE PLEASE HEL-”

She was tackled to the ground before she could get to the street and felt a hard kick to the ribs as someone held her down. The pain was so intense she wanted to cry, but there was no air left in her small body. The kick had winded her again, and she was left gasping as the strikes continued.

“You -fucking- bitch-” Mark huffed in between thuds of his shoes against her chest. He stopped the barrage and spit on the ground near her face. “If you thought it was going to be bad before- you have no idea what you’re in for now.”

The other guy moved from restraining Rose on the ground and grabbed her hair again. She was bleeding now, red smeared on her skin like blush.

“You’re gunna get it bitch, and you’re gunna be beggin we kill you.” He chuckled darkly and turned back to Mark, grabbing the knife again and holding it against her cheek.

Mark stood off to the side, eyeing her smugly as his nose dripped with his own blood. 

“First, we’re gunna start with cuttin off this pretty hair of yours.” He sneered, obviously enjoying himself.

Rose was barely hanging on to consciousness and felt a tear run down her cheek, knowing this would be her last night on this earth and these pricks were the last thing she’d ever see.

I tried, Dom.

I'm sorry. 

Suddenly, a figure landed behind the men with a powerful thud on the pavement.

“Now that’d be a shame to wreck her pretty hair, don’t ya think Leo?”

The men jumped at the gravelly voice behind them, and audibly gasped when three other figures emerged from the shadows.

One of them stepped closer.

“I believe you’re right, Raph. It looks like these boys don’t understand the meaning of chivalry.” The figure leaned down to look both trembling men in the face. “Let go of her. Now.”

The man holding her tightened his grip on her hair, and Rose could feel his hand shaking. She yelped from the pain and the first figure that had spoken growled under his breath.

“You gunna fuckin make me, freaks?!” The man sneered and flicked his knife in their direction. “Just leave us alone and we won’t hurt y-.” He had barely finished speaking when the first figure grabbed the man’s neck with one hand and lifted him off the ground.

He let go of Rose and the knife to grab at the massive fingers around his throat, and she sank to the ground unconscious as the blade clattered to the asphalt. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Raphael and his brothers had been cooped up for so long in the lair that they were all going a bit stir crazy.

Master Splinter had not been feeling well, so the team had stayed home to care for him in his old age for a week or so while he recovered. Donatello and Leonardo were the main care-takers, while Raphael and Michelangelo mostly tried to stay out of the way.

As a result, the two spent most of their time in the weight room, annoying their brothers with the constant clinking of metal all hours of the night.

Tensions had reached a boiling point this afternoon, when Donnie had been trying to nap on the couch. Mikey and Raph had snuck up behind the sofa and flipped it, sending their brother flying with a squawk as he flailed to the ground.

As a result, Mikey and Raph were sentenced to bathroom cleaning duty for a month, and once Sensei was tucked in for the night, the team headed out to patrol.

They had stopped for a moment atop an apartment building in the dark of the city, waiting and listening. Donnie had been combing through the police scanner, but it was a quiet night in NYC.

Well, as quiet as the city gets anyway, Raph thought.

There was the constant hum of cars, horns, and people bustling around 24/7, but he loved it.

New York was home, and even though they would never be able to live like humans, he still wouldn’t trade his life for the world.

As Raph was lost in the view of the city skyline, a yell from a few blocks over caught the turtle's attention.

The team jumped into action, headed to the source of the noise.

Each turtle had a different style of traveling from roof -to-roof, and Raphael laughed as he watched the youngest flip through the air over a billboard- Mikey loved to show off with his board any chance he got.

“It’s crazy that no one’s noticed ya Mike," Raph huffed as he swung over a gap between buildings, “with how much you mess around ya’d think we'dve gotten caught daily by now.”

“Oh you’re just jealous you don’t have my mad skills, dude” Mikey gloated, doing a front flip over the side of a ledge with a wink to prove his point.

The red banded turtle shook his head and smiled- as much as his brothers annoyed him, they were family, and he had to admit the guy had some serious acrobatic talent.

Not that he’d ever tell him to his face.

They arrived at a building overlooking an alley next to a dive bar, and saw two men entering the dark side street. Raph narrowed his eyes as he watched them, and froze when he saw their target.

A young woman leaned on the outside wall of the bar, clearly shaken and digging in her purse for something. In a moment the men were on her and she was knocked to the ground, gasping for air.

He jolted forward, but a firm hand on his arm signaled him to halt. It took everything in him to not rush down, but he knew better than to start a fight with Leo over “who the leader was” again.

He looked over to Leonardo, who eyed the scene for a moment before pointing to the nearest vantage point, and they made their way down to the alley.

As Raph moved, he watched the woman as the men spoke to her in hushed tones. Her hair was captivating and out of place in the dark alley, almost a copper halo of curls surrounding her face, and he couldn't help but stare as he climbed. 

Focus, gotta focus.

As they prepared to leap down into action, the woman did something that none of the turtles expected.

She broke one of the guys' noses and was running back to the street, yelling for help.

Raph almost smiled; this girl had some brass balls. She was in this life-or-death situation, and chose to fight her way out instead of cowering. 

“ Leo, we've got to get in there, but she’s too close to the street now. We’ll be seen.” Donnie looked down at the well-lit street and alley in front of them. There were cars passing by, but no pedestrians; so maybe she would get to the street so they could apprehend the men in the alley without her seeing them. 

“Yeah, Don. Just let me think for a minute.”

He was right.

They could not expose their family and risk their safety, but they also needed to uphold their oath to protect the citizens of this city.

It's their duty, as heroes of New York.

Leo huffed to himself and chewed at his lip as he kept his eyes focused on the scene in front of them. 

“Leo, we gotta get down there."

Raph was close to snapping. He watched in horror as the men caught up to her and took her down, beginning a fierce barrage of kicks to her chest.

“I ain't waitin’ Leo.”

Raph leapt off the building and landed behind the men, his brothers following suit. He figured he would have to answer for not following orders later, but he just couldn’t watch this happen.

His feet made a loud thud boom in the quiet darkness directly behind the men.

The woman was conscious but fading, and as Leo took the lead in trying to convince them to surrender quickly, Raph watched as the man that had a grip on her hair tightened it. She cried out in pain, a tear streaming down her face, and Raph lost all control he had over his anger. The guy said something to him, but he didn’t hear it.

Before he realized what he was doing, he was gripping the man’s throat in one hand and lifting him off the ground.

The prick was struggling and begging for his life, but all Raph could see was the beautiful woman on the ground, bruised and bleeding.

Mikey scooped her up in his arms, and Donnie began checking her vitals on his wrist scanner.

Raph could faintly hear Leo saying something, and it took a minute before he heard him clearly.

“Raph, put the guy down. Cops are enroute, and you’re going to kill him.”

He loosened his grip and let the unconscious male slip from his hands, slumping on the ground.

“Payback’s a bitch.” Raph chuckled darkly. Coming back to his senses, he felt a little guilty.

A little. 

“Donnie, is he dead?” Mikey's voice was steeped in worry as he poked his head over Raph's shoulder, the woman still cradled in his arms. 

The purple banded turtle looked over at the man before turning his attention back to the bigger problem at hand.

“No, just unconscious. She, however, is not doing well and will need medical treatment.”

Turning to Leo he commented as his fingers danced over his scanner, eyes scanning the digital displays, “I think they gave her some sort of drug. Her blood alcohol level is low, but she seems to be under the influence of something. I worry that a hospital would not know what to look for if we just dropped her off. I would be able to test and treat her in the lab- “

Donnie cut himself off as his monitor beeped.

“Her vitals are dropping, Leo. What’s your call?”

“Call Sensei and let him know we’re having company. Let’s move out boys.”

[pagerunner-j]

Still jumping around a bit randomly through old DW episodes. Tonight I watched the double-header of The Impossible Planet and The Satan Pit. I always liked these episodes, in large part because they go for some pretty intense deep space horror, centered around a doozy of a villain this time, because what the hell (no pun intended): we've had evil mannequins and farting aliens and evil lunch ladies so far, so why not raise the stakes about as high as they'll go for some contrast and put everybody up against the actual Devil?

When this show decides to go balls to the wall, it really goddamn goes for it.

I also appreciate, really, that these episodes had the nerve to (albeit very, very carefully) touch on matters of religion and faith, because it's pretty hard not to when you're dealing with this topic. Ultimately, though, it's mostly concerned with people, both the good and the bad: equating hell with the evil men do, and coming down squarely on the side of the most powerful belief being faith in each other to do what's right instead. And of course Rose is right smack in that column. She gets the classic companion role here of bonding with the episode's guest cast and getting the best out of them at every turn she can. Meanwhile, the Doctor's solution to the biggest conflict at the end depends entirely on faith in her, which of course pays off.

And those two spend both episodes acting so blatantly in love with each other that it's r i d i c u l o u s and apparently after seventeen years my heart has still not yet recovered from this.

I mean: the mortgage conversation, and nervously stumbling over the idea of living together somewhere? The way Rose kisses his helmet? The hugs, plural? Rose's attempt at reaching him over the comms, and desperately trying to stay behind for him even while the crew's trying to drag her to safety? That wistful conversation between Ida and the Doctor as they're both preparing for probable death, he's slowly disconnecting his cables over the chasm, and he can't get out the words for what to tell Rose, except for, "Oh, she knows"? (Fourteen would say it. Fourteen would say every damn word. Ten just kept breaking our hearts about it for multiple seasons in a row.) And then there's the foreshadowing but they're in denial about it and they don't know what they're in for in four episodes' time and he won't be able to get the truth out then either and she'll cry and break everyone's hearts and he'll cry and break mine and goddammit I have a problem.

Anyway. Have I ever mentioned I'm one part exhausted cynic and one part hopeless romantic sap? Because the latter is winning out here, kids.

Footnote about something I enjoyed at the time: Shaun Parkes, one of the key guest cast members in this, also co-starred with David Tennant in Casanova on the BBC (also written by RTD). I haven't watched that in a long damn time either, but I recall it as being entertaining, which, well, I mean: it's David Tennant as Casanova. Think that one through for a second and then go find it somewhere and see for yourself. (I'm pretty sure it's kicking around the Tube that is You unofficially, but you didn't hear that from me.)

[w3ath3r-0f-sw34t3rz]

as many ttpd thoughts as i can coherently write down

first of all grateful for the folklore x midnights x 1989/rep sound we have going on here. i hate comparing artists but seriously the best way i can explain it is phoebe bridgers this album sounds like phoebe bridgers. not like it's a bad thing it's phoebe fucking bridgers!!!

i feel like it's so easy to call music "intimate," whether because of lyrics that feel personal or just a certain raw sound, or whatever else, but this album truly is the most intimate thing i think taylor's ever given us. i don't know what sets it apart, cuz at this point she's written plenty of deeply personal lyrics, but the way i best know how to describe it is that it truly feels like she trusts us.

anyway i'm willing to admit that this album isn't a spectacle or a revolution or game changer, and i know it won't satisfy everyone (ngl i'm scared to see what everyone else is saying bc they'll never understand Like I Do) but damn it sometimes that much is more than enough. without further adieu

fortnight a solid vibe. i'd literally love any song with the lyric "i love you it's ruining my life"

ttpd love that lucy and jack cameo that's about it. but really who else is gonna hold you

mbobhft AUGGGHHH THAT HOOK. you'd think you'd be able to tell which tracks are entirely self-written but you'd never guess some of the best tracks would you? jokes on me. love the metaphor (as i tend to do), big fan of infantilizing men (no like actually)

down bad this song was not clicking at first but it won me over with the alien abduction theme

so long london aw fuck yeah i knew i was right to claim this one. that hook is delectable. every verse is like a juicy kiss on the mouth i love this song yOU SWORE THAT YOU LOVED ME BUT WHERE WERE THE CLU

but daddy i love him this was the point where i thought to myself "wow this album is a lot more romantic than i would've thought" which, in hindsight, idk if that can be the consensus but still--this is such a feel good happy lovely time

fresh out the slammer evermore would love this one. yee haw

florida i mean there was really no way for this song to be bad and damn. twas not. this is a screamer fs. how on earth they managed to make a song about fucking florida feel like this mysterious shady world that we the people are not apart of is astounding to me

guilty as sin yas girl let your freak flag fly!!! successor to false god fr

who's afraid of little old me oh. o,h my god. taylor. taylor r u good honey. this song is fucking batshit wild oh my god YES GIRL TELL EM i will never be the same i could end the california drought with these tear ducks holy shit im gonna go set something on fire

i can fix him i love this bc this is literally my best friend and now they're gonna know how they look. that "woah maybe i can't" both absolutely slaps and is hilarious. also love how horny that bridge was yas girl let your freak flag fly!!

loml oh god. lmao my ass rlly thought this album wasn't gonna be too depressing. they had me in the first half ngl. i'm not crying you're crying nahhh we're both crying and you know it. the lyrics here really popped off, like more than the rest of the album and that's saying something. bonus i remember seeing someone theorize that it was actually gonna be "loss of my life" instead of love, and while i was listening i had that in the back of my mind, but then i was like "ok no it's actually love" but then THEY WERE RIGHT and i felt so accomplished for no good reason. so if ur that person who called it, good job brother

i can do it with a broken heart this one shocks me so good oml why is this making me wanna throw it back. with all do respect if you didn't want us to enjoy your suffering why did you make your suffering such a bop. /j that "i'm miserable and nobody knows!! :D" gives me chills but like in a good way. "try and come for my job" literally get it queen i love you

smallest man who ever lived it's quite funny to me that literally nobody was claiming this track and then it permanently altered my brain chemistry. back at it with the hooks damn. wow this one really. this one is really sticking with me guys

the alchemy yay the vibes are back!!!! sweet simple romance you gotta love it

clara bow you had me at that intro. shove that guitar down my throat if u will. this is the better version of the lucky one (im not sorry.) damn "you look like Taylor Swift in this light" gets me every time i'm sorry that will never not hit

the black dog OLD HABITS DIE SCREAAAAAMMMIIINNNNNGGGGGGGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG i did not expect to like this one as much as i do but i can't stop thinking about it

imgonnagetyouback i had really mixed feelings but i literally can't dislike this song it's straight up good (also this song is so gorgeous-coded its wild)

the albatross idk i just love this one it is so sweet to me. in the way molasses is sweet but still

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus this melody has wriggled its way into the few folds of my brain and i don't see it leaving soon. i love me some good whimsy. fr as i'm listening to it again rn i'm realizing how good this production is. anyways bi rights

how did it end? you know................... i was really trying to not tie her real life into any of these songs, since i really don't know that much lore + i'm not a big fan of obsessing over celebrities personal lives--relationships most of all (especially when it comes to taylor)--in general, but damn i immediately did just that with this song and.. wow. but aside from all of that oh my god welcome back to Songs On This Album That Absolutely Haunt Me

so high school this one's kinda crazy bc damn it's such a taylor swift song but the sound is so new to her and it kind of makes me cry. but anyhow "touch me while your bros play grand theft auto" is the funniest fucking line i have ever heard in my life

i hate it here oh wow hahhahahhahahahha taylor what the fuck :3 imagine relating to this song on an cosmic level lmfaooooo

thank you aimee removing from irl context, putting this song next to mean genuinely makes me want to cry. like the maturity and growth both happy and sad is so evident it's like watching my child graduate

i look in people's windows another stellar string hook thank you and goodbye. ok but fr the visual here is inherently funny

the prophecy claiming this one for the neurodivergents

cassandra yeah yeah drama i know but damnnnn greek mythology BANGER

peter *taking notes* never... trust.. a man.. named..... peter.........

the bolter she's a runner she's a track star (can you tell i've run out of things to say it's just a good fucking album)

robin ohohoho i am an absolute SLUT for a good ode to childhood

the manuscript now that's a story

and at last--my current rankings:

who's afraid of little old me?

so long, london

how did it end?

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus

the smallest man who ever lived

florida!!!

clara bow

the alchemy

loml

i can do it with a broken heart

the albatross

my boy only breaks his favorite toys

i look in people's windows

cassandra

fortnight

i hate it here

the black dog

but daddy i love him

thanK you aIMee

the bolter

guilty as sin?

robin

i can fix him (no really i can)

the prophecy

peter

the manuscript

so high school

fresh out the slammer

the tortured poets department

imgonnagetyouback

down bad

now i know being critical is not one of my specialties but seriously it's a solid album ok. midnights is literally my baby and it has a skip for me so

now naturally my enthusiasm for each song will potentially decrease and most certainly increase over time cuz that's how i process albums buttttttt yuh 👍

almost any other artist building an entire persona about being an emo poet would make me roll my eyes but damn it she's so right

[theresaghostinmyhome]

❝𝘎𝘦𝘵 𝘶𝘴 𝘢 𝘵𝘦𝘢❞ ✫ ❝𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘴.❞

↓ Hiya, welcome to my blog. I'm Miya, better known as the biggest CoD man simp this side of the country. I love writing and hope to better the general fanfic/headcanon sphere of this fandom, seeing as I feel like it lacks some things (cough Gaz and Alex cough). I will be covering CoD MW (2019)/(2022), the original MW games, perhaps some other CoD games too if I feel up to it! If you like what you see, stick around. I'll just be here...staring at all these men. ↓ !!this blog will remain mostly SFW, but occasionally i might post some NSFW. I'll be sure to tag it properly and hide it under a readmore, I pinkie promise y'all!! ↓ 𝘙𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘴: 𝘖𝘱𝘦𝘯

𝘈𝘴𝘬𝘴: 𝘖𝘱𝘦𝘯 ↓

𝘓𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘴 These are a list of tags that will be used for specific characters I'll be writing for so you can actually find them amongst the other tags on my blog. Also the list of people I write for pretty exclusively. Not that I wont branch out, but for now just these individuals. Have fun!

• #Simon R.➳ • #Johnny M.➳ • #John P.➳ • #Kyle G.➳ • #Gary S.➳ • #Alejandro V.➳ • #Rodolfo P.➳ • #Alex K.➳ • #Farah K.➳ • #König➳

↓ 𝘈𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘮𝘦 Wanna know more huh? Either you're nosy or scrolled a bit too far. Welp here we go! I'm Miya, she/they, a 20 year old desert dweller queer with too many hobbies and an addiction to Dr. Pepper. Libra sun, Scorpio moon, Taurus rising-- whatever that means anyway! I'm sure you astrology girlies are either gasping and running away or wondering how I'm navigating my life. My gender is however many cups of water it takes to dilute bleach. But in a gay way. I like drawing, writing, gaming, music and playlist making, jewelry making, sitcoms, and indulging in fiction to the highest degree. I'm a certified ADHDer and am pretty Autistic. Maladaptive daydreamer. I always have a lot on my plate but I yearn for more ✨ I have a wonderful partner whomst is also knee-deep in the CoD sauce, they'll linger here too, no doubt. She's a Soap girlie, I'm a Ghost girlie, it all works out. Love her to absolute death <3 Anyway, yeah that's about it! Enjoy your stay here, simps.

[theorist-influencer-untitled]

2.21.23 Tuesday

11:21 am

Still cooking and not my ideal life though in a way I enjoy cooking but of course I still miss having yaya's with me...

Anyways, just for emergency knowledge... I have giniling and fried bangus which is still inside the air fryer...

My entire left body is in pain... I'm thinking of money and I'm thinking of my own career... I feel self-pity for 16 years...

I don't know if I'm gonna love or hate the cult of Manalo's...

I'm longing to have upper men's friends who are willing to give me a "piggy-back"... In a way, I have so many complex in life... I miss going to gym and I can't right now... I really want a man who is gentleman as a partner not just a partner-friends like the pretty faces of my boy friend'Z...

I wanna have my own business... What am I gonna do? I missed my entire life,angels...I'm a college graduate but I'm a bummer other people who are claiming that they are my friends are the bomber...But what is their intention on me? For trapping and stealing my possible men who can lift me up...

11:41 am

Bangus is done...

1:11 pm

This Uncle Jun feeling the president of this Cavite ha! Full of reaction on the rice....It was cooked last night and probably the rice is not a good kind....I DON'T KNOW WHO BOUGHT THAT RICE ON THE PLASTICS. It is truly becoming wet coz my grandmother added a water last night... But probably the rice is not a good kind...

He is not my husband... He is nagging right now... I have body pain on my entire left side...

He is saying or commenting something that, that's the reason why the blessing is not with us....I told him huh? I said what is the connection I told him, that it depends on your heart... If you have a black heart,you have a black heart... Starting to make a way to destroy us here... Very jealous...Feeling husband... Fakish linking with R-None...

Anyways, I'm thinking of my own career... Handsome friends...I think there is an ugly persona who is trapping me...

Those R-None are just frat house...They are also in a way immature and fakish people... I just do care for Mommy Adnil... But Ms Enaoj R-None and Ms Yoj are kinda weird... IT SEEMS THEIR HOUSE ARE MIXED LINKING OF PEOPLE. A frat house...

I hate George as well, I hate their uppish group... Still, I'm at the bottom...

For the judgemental people I had yaya's and assistant and helper's...

Year 2009 I still had an assistant.... Just recently I lost a personal assistant.

I hate George's group for being progressive and his family... I feel jealous of them since 2007!

2:25 pm

I'm already 41 and I don't know if I can be sweet 16 or spicy 17 and a lady 18 again? I FEEL BITTER!!! MIKE 1234... Can't even see my arab men... I need to go back and progress!

4:30 pm

I hate everyone here since 2007 destroying me... I hate the face of George and his family for progressing... Why him? Why his family?

I still have the windblow trap... I'm a college graduate and someone is pulling me down I can't progress...

That R-None in Lacub is another weird family lead by the father and son... And I think I saw my old schoolmate named Moya, why she is not existing but only on those picture frames... It is just a frat-house... Moya is my schoolmate in Immaculate Conception Academy and she is married to a R-None's son but probably just a made-up surname... Ms Enaoj could be a Cantimbuhan link????

4:37 pm

Uncle Jun looks strange...Just in the house togetherness with us here...Just an observer...

This RV is weird... They will go to see a doctor coz their daughter needs a check-up on her eyes. RV mentioned about the strabismus that I told him I already said that last year probably but they wouldn't believe me... Now, he was kinda irritated that probably it also needs an eye drop to rèlax the muscle, I said... He said she needs an eyeglasses in an irritated voice...But I told them last year his daughter needs a check-up...

8:32 pm

I still have the windblow trap and I'm super self-pitying... I'm tired of being a supporter for 16 years... I lost my future! I feel fat and ugly... I hate judgemental people on me... I'm thinking of money.... I wanna do beauty therapy and supposed to be I'm working and meeting men....I feel fat and ugly....Supposed to be at least I'm enjoying...

I want men's friends who can accept me that I was spoiled and still longing to be spoiled...I need to protect myself from wicked women and bad and judgemental and immature men.

I wanna have my own men's group, where I can be me and be center again getting attention. Who can embrace me on my tantrums coz I feel bitter coz I'm supposed to be spoiled... For 16 years they just put me in the center, waiting for me to be ugly and to laugh at... I feel hurt some FilipinoZ!

My entire left body is aching....I feel fat and ugly and I can't do gluta and I can't go back to gym....

[soundof-rain]

Hello Again

Hello, I know it’s been a very veryyy long time since i’ve been here & it may be a long time again after this post but i’m here now so that’s what matters. Today is 11/22/2022 and there is so much that has happened over the past year that one couldn’t even imagine ; I moved away from my toxic family for good and settled in seattle - a HUGE leap of faith on my end but when a plan is conspired with everyones interest in mind but yours you have to make do and just DO something. So I did. I landed here a year ago with whatever money I had left from unemployment and my belongings and made due, I didn’t know the area, I didn’t know the people I didn’t know where to start but again I did something because I had to and it turned out to be the best I could do in that circumstance. I lived in a hostel for a few months -The Green Tortoise- until I found my footing and could afford an apartment, I started working literally my first full week here as a concierge and the ball began rolling from there. I used to work long shifts to start out pulling multiple 12 and 16 hour shifts a week and even though I was tired I had money to make so I could stop shacking up with randoms every night. 

I was stressed depressed and losing my mind in every sense of the meaning honestly but in true me fashion I just kept on going. I remember one night in the hostel I was in a room with all men , one of which on the bunkbeds directly across from me was snoring like he slept on the plushest cloud in the sky, so his bottom bunk mate began kicking his bunk from below to get him to quiet down-This did not turn out so well. The cloud sleeper (or top bunk occupant) woke up and they exchanged words the first time then it happened again and when he climbed down that narrow ladder all hell broke loose. Top bunk occupant began threatening bottom bunk and getting dressed “welcoming” him to get up and fight him and although that was anything but what bottom occupant wanted a fight broke anyway. A partially naked one at that. I forget what led to the men getting physical but all i know is one second their arguing and the next a naked man is slammed on my bunk - talk about crazy. There were also good times in the hostel as well that I won’t get into because that not what this is about lol. Finding living definitely was hard having to move my bags constantly , I remember an uber driver threw all my belongings in the middle of the street in china town in the rain and pulled off lol, wasn’t funny then and it still isn’t now but I just couldn’t believe that happened. The lack of decency some people have is outrageous. Anyway I finally found an apartment around December and jumped through some hoops to get the apartment due to me not having credit but I still managed to get through and set my move in date, which left me standing outside in the freezing cold for about an hour and a half because they were notoriously slow and my keys weren’t in the combination lock where and WHEN it was supposed to be, l o l. A lot of little happenings like this took place I also had A LOT of break downs , like A LOT but being a fresh 21 year old (I turned 21 in seattle) who doesn’t have any friends nor family and no idea wtf is going on with your life you’re bound to freak the fuck out. Fast forward the entire year of 22′ and a handful of jobs later , I sit here in my apartment writing this for you all, who’s you all? Not sure but whoever decides to read this I hope you’re thoroughly entertained by my mess. 

This post was honestly supposed to be about how i’m feeling right now in regards to the holidays and/or lack thereof for me. My birthday was 2 days ago and I turned 22 ! WHOOO HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME !! However that was spent in my apartment alone with a grocery store cake and some takeout , I received literally 5 happy birthdays , one of which was sung to me so I really whole heartedly appreciate that to my core, I sung happy birthday to myself and blew out the candles by myself and enjoyed the rest of the day watching movies. Nothing spectacular nor special but it was an intimate little moment for me and the fact that I was able to still find happiness despite being sorely alone means a lot to me, it was never about how many people cared enough to remember , I honestly expected 3 tops. But, now as the last few holidays of the year are approaching , the most family oriented ones, I’m stuck wondering when it’ll be my turn to experience it . For me right now there is nothing special about holidays its just another day, birthday included, and I spend them working or in my apartment under the covers for the day and that really fucking sucks if I say so myself , and I do say so myself. Still don’t have any friends, no family either and it just makes me wonder if I’ll ever get that Holiday Spirit vibe in my life ever again yknow. When you’re in certain situations it can make it hard to see alternative ways of being or happenings for yourself so you kind of just have to have faith. It’s like what are the chances I’ll be alone forever and never have holiday joy or even people that like me and enjoy me enough to spend holidays with me , there’s definitely a chance but how high is it exactly? I’m not a bad person and I’ve done more than enough healing this year that I know it’s not happening to me it’s happening for me so that really changed my outlook on a lot of situations to the point where there’s not sorrow or pity it’s just being like okay yes i’m alone but this is what it is for RIGHT NOW! It won’t be like this forever, do I know when it’ll change ? Nope but all I can do for myself is not dwell on it and hope for the best. 

[secretsofblackthornhall]

Kieran to Julian

To: Julian Blackthorn, Master of Blackthorn Hall

From: The Court of Unseelie

My dear Brother,

Mark has shared with me, with your permission I gather, the contents of your last letter to him as they regard Round Tom and the manor house. I have investigated what you ask, and it unfortunately falls to me to agree with yon Thomas: Blackthorn Hall is suffering under a curse.

I am sure that from your perspective, the bad news is less the fact of the house’s curse, and more the additional charges that Round Tom has added for the repairs and updates that his team is performing. It must especially vex you that these new prices do not include the breaking of the curse, but are only meant to cover the increased risks for the workers and the extra protections they will need to take.

I have already taken steps to seek a solution, but pray let me explain the situation, perhaps somewhat more cogently than R. Tom was able.

First, please know that Tom’s unwillingness to break the curse in fact is a prime example of his virtue (or, Mark has suggested, his fear of the office I hold; I choose to think it the former). The company working on Blackthorn Hall is not at all qualified to address such a complex thing as a curse. In this situation, many of the fey (though I am loath to admit it) would claim they could solve the problem, and would charge you enormously for a task they could not, in truth, accomplish. That Tom has not done so is a credit to him.

I appreciated your suggestion that the curse and the specter haunting the house could be one and the same. Unfortunately, when I communicated with Round Tom through my sources—

(Mark has interfered to admonish me for not simply saying General Winter; my apologies. Speaking plainly in written correspondence can be remarkably difficult for one used to the politics of Faerie.)

Unfortunately, after communicating with Round Tom via General Winter, I have been assured beyond a doubt that the ghost and the curse are different articles. Round Tom’s words, I believe, were to the effect that,

“Old houses always have ghosts. We don’t mind ghosts, and they do not interfere with our work. A curse, however, does, and Blackthorn Hall is cursed.”

He also made clear that it had been his impression that you already knew—that when the house’s owner shares the same name as the house, they likely already know enough of the history to be aware of a curse. Of course, he doesn’t know anything about the history of the Blackthorn family, and he should not have made such an assumption.

I pressed him to lower the price anyway, as a personal favor, and explained that the circumstances of your taking ownership were quite unexpected. I am sorry to say that he could not be moved. He produced a veritable library’s worth of treaties, bylaws, and charters to support his contention that these protections for his men were guaranteed by the Courts of Faerie, and in fact, he is correct.

I am therefore in the regretful position of suggesting that you focus your efforts on discovering and lifting the curse. While it is true that Round Tom and his crew will be unable to assist you, I know you to be a well-connected member of the Nephilim, and among your friends and companions many warlocks, Silent Brothers, and so on are to be found. I have every confidence in you and Emma; surely no curse can go long unlifted once the two of you have committed yourselves to its end. I have enclosed a brochure that might be helpful, as it is intended for those who have just discovered their dwelling-place is cursed. (Mark tells me one should never utter the words “I have enclosed a brochure” in personal correspondence, but I am not sure how else to word what I am doing. Perhaps “Lo, a pamphlet” would have been more appropriate.)

Thank you also for the delicious cake that you sent. While it does not stir the wild blood of my heart as faerie food does, it was a delicious accompaniment to a pot of strong tea, and we enjoyed it here muchly. Mark has informed me that this cake was created by a mundane, Victoria Sponge. All credit to Lady Sponge, and to you for sharing her artistry with us!

Mark and Cristina send their love. To that I attach my own, and remain etc. etc. Hail Kraig.

Kieran