#anyway goodbye for now and if you read the tags feel free to suggest something else for me to draw

[nichecollection]

more tim drake

[the-kcm-muggleborn]

Kind For You

Fandom: Hogwarts Legacy

O/C: Sebastian Sallow x Edwart Thompson x Ominis Gaunt ✨️platonic✨️ (My OC)

Warnings: Light swearing.

Word count: 1k>

Chapter 4

Part 9

“Alright. Stay here. I won't take long.” Ed said as he looked around the Pub. He noticed Poppy standing in the corner of the room. He was hoping Sebastian would behave… for once.

“This is a change of pace from our last outing.” Edwart smiled.

But Poppy groaned slightly. Don't remind me. The thought of that tent still makes my blood boil… Sebastian came with you?” She smiled with interest.

This time Edwart groaned. “Don't remind me. He simply tagged on. He needs my help. Anyway…”

“Yes," Poppy nodded. "I've been thinking about those poor dragons in the fighting ring. The collars they were wearing. They appeared to be goblin silver. I think a collar is precisely what we found at that poacher camp. I've never known poachers to use anything like that before”

“Fascinating,” Edwart said thoughtfully. “The dragon that attacked my carriage was wearing a collar and Professor Fig was genuinely baffled by its behaviour.”

“That attack always did strike me as a little strange, seemingly coming out of nowhere” She frowned. “Surely you aren't suggesting that the collars somehow control the poor creatures.”

“That's exactly what it all looks like to me.” Edwart confirmed.

“Merlin. I don't think the dragon we set free was wearing a collar, but we should check. And if we can find her, we can return her egg-”

Edwart whined. “Must we? That seems a lot of trouble to go to for a creature we already rescued.”

Poppy chuckled a little. “I know you don't like creatures. But we should see this through let me find out where she is. There's no half-measures with all this.” Poppy took a pause. “There was something else that I wanted to discuss with you. I didn't want to press it before.”

“Shoot,” Ed said, but he already knew what it was regarding.

Poppy hesitated. She put a hand on Edwart's arm. “It seems I may have caused you more trouble with Victor Rookwood. Why is he after you? You can trust me.”

“Oh, Poppy.” Edwart cooed. He put his hands on Poppy's shoulders. A gesture he nearly never did. “You never caused me any trouble. They were after me before I even started helping you.” Edwart looked around as a safety precaution. But the only person looking at him he noticed was Sebastian. His eyes were as dark as if he wanted to murder Edwart and Poppy. Ed furrowed his brows, and Sebastian quickly turned around. “Strange…” Edwart thought but quickly shook his head and focused his attention back on Poppy. He took his hands off of her. “Rookwood is working with Ranrok. So are the Pochers I presume there’s a hefty award for catching me. And Ranrok is after me because of something I found at Gringotts. Fig had a Portkey that led us there after the dragon attack. It's a bit of a long story, and Fig had asked that I not speak of it yet.”

“Goodness! Well, that certainly helps to shed light on what we saw at the tent. That's quite a lot…” Poppy's eyes were the size of coins from bewilderment. “I shan't press for more details. In fact, I should probably be going. I'd like to track that dragon down as soon as I can.”

“I'll tell you more over a butterbeer or two… I promise.” Edwart smiled.

“Sure. Thank you for telling me.” Poppy smiled genuinely as Edwart walked away waving a short goodbye.

“Now… what to do with Sebastian. He's behaving very unusually.” Ed thought as we walked over to his friend. "Maybe it is best to just ignore it." He quietly cleared his throat. “Hey. I'm all done. We can head out.”

“Ah. Alright.” Sebastian cleared his throat and got to his feet. “Thanks, Sirona.”

“Come again, anytime.” She said back with a smile as both boys finally headed out to Feldcroft.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Sebastian, that relic you mentioned…” Edwart spoke as both boys were walking towards the catacomb. He had a bad feeling…

“From what I read in a report by that Slytherin student, they weren't permitted to take it with them. So, I must assume it's still here. As I mentioned earlier, this relic grants its holder the power to reverse Dark Magic curses.” Sebastian answered, focusing on the path they were walking on.

“Mhm.” Edwart mused.

“If it's in this catacomb. I have to find it. For Anne. I need to see her.” Sebastian's voice was pained. Edwart silenced his overthinking brain. Decided to trust Sebastian for once.

Edwart sighed. “I'd be interested to know what else the student discovered.”

Sebastian took a look behind his shoulder with a slightly raised eyebrow. “Have a look.” He handed Edwart a yellow torn paper. “Unfortunately, there's no name on it and it's all smudged, makes it harder to read. But, I suspect if it was important enough for Slytherin to stash in his spellbook.”

“It's worthy of further study,” Edwart muttered.

Finally, Sebastian stopped, announcing they've reached the catacomb. “We’re here.” He said.

“Let’s explore then. Perhaps we can visit Anne when we've finished.” Edwart said with a small smile.

“Perfect. By the way,” Sebastian furrowed his brows. “Ominis has been asking about you. You didn't tell him what we were doing, did you?”

“Asking about me? But... why?” Edwart thought. He cleared his throat and spoke. “I didn't. I promise.” He sighed. “...Wish I did, though.” Edwart finished that sentence in his mind.

“Good.” Sebastian exhaled relieved. “Ominis would be livid if he knew what we were about to do… I'll be interested to compare what lies inside to what I've read about this catacomb.”

Edwart kept quiet. He didn't know what to say. All this felt wrong to him. Like he was betraying someone. But what Edwart really needed was to shut his emotions. And he did.

“I'm sure that foul smell is the scent of success - try not to lose your nerve just yet.” Sebastian joked as they entered the catacomb.

They kept walking on the long dark corridor in silence when Edwart heard something. “At least now we know we're not alone in here.”

“Ah, blast,” Sebastian said as the spiders started crawling around both boys with an awfully characteristic sound. They both shot spell after spell when finally all the spiders were dead.

“Perhaps that was it, and the rest of the tomb will be insect-free.”

Edwart chuckled. “Yeah, spiders aren't insects.”

“Don't start.” Sebastian furrowed his eyebrows, but his smile betrayed his true, playful emotions.

Both boys kept walking through the dark and dusty catacomb. Edwart was stuck in thoughts. Thinking of how Sebastian could turn any situation into a laughing moment. He was grateful for such a… friend.

“Now this is the sort of great room I want to be buried in,” Sebastian said with a big smile.

Edwart raised an eyebrow with a smile and chuckled. “Surrounded by grandeur?”

“Grandeur and then some. Even an altar with a pile of bones - lovely.” Sebastian said as he took a step closer to the centre of the room.

Edwart smiled and shook his head in disbelief. “You're so strange, Sebastian.”

Sebastian looked at Edwart with a smile. “Alright, you. Where would you like to be buried?”

Edwart's smile shifted into a small, reminiscent one. “With my mother. If I… got to choose.”

Sebastian's smile dropped. “Shit… I-I'm sorry.”

“No, no. You… you asked. I just answered.” Edwart tried to defuse the situation. He crossed his arms. “I don't talk about her often. But I miss her, you know?”

“I know...” Sebastian turned around as both boys looked around the great room. “Did you hear that?”

“Look at those bones outside a sarcophagus. Seems… odd.” Edwart ignored Sebastian and looked under his feet. “There's something here by the altar.”

“What did you find?” Sebastian came behind Edwart's shoulder.

“Looks like part of a student's diary. It mentions plans to return for the relic and conjuring barricades using bones.

“Of course!” Sebastian said. “The student summary referenced a space beyond the Great Room. Which means this can't be a dead end. Let's divide and conquer. You work on sorting out the bone barricades, I'll look around and see what we missed…Hold on to that diary entry. There may be more to it.”

“Sure. It does mention something else - it says their next assignment was… learning the Imperius Curse.” Edwart stumbled. He did not want a repeat of the scriptorium.

“Really? Interesting.” Sebastian muttered thoughtfully.

“What do you mean inte-” Edwart spoke but was interrupted by Sebastian. “We need to focus on moving beyond this room - but let me think for a moment”

Edwart grimaced at that. “I'll start to search for those barricades then.”

It took Ed a moment to collect everything, but he managed to solve it. To Sebastian's approval. “You've done it! I knew we'd get through. I felt it in my bones.”

Edwart couldn't help but genuinely laugh at that perfectly timed pun. “Nice.” He chuckled.

"Hold on just a moment.” Sebastian stopped his friend with a serious face this time. “Before we trudge on further, I've just realised something.”

“What is it?” Edwrt furrowed his brows.

“The student's diary mentions the Imperius Curse. I wouldn't be surprised if we're going to need it here. It's an Unforgivable, but useful when you're outnumbered. Places the victim completely under the caster's control.”

Edwart scoffed, not wanting to hear a word more. “Absolutely not Sebastian. Let's just… keep going.”

“Really? But we've no idea what may lie ahead.” Sebastian spoke, but Edwart once more interrupted him. “Sebastian!” He said with a sharp warning tone.

“Alright Alright.” Sebastian put his hands up in a surrendering gesture. “I shan't press you. I'll have your back no matter what we face in there.”

“Mhm.” Edwart was having that bad feeling again.

"Oh, look, another barricade? Considering how well you did on the last one, this should be a cinch.”

Edwart sent Sebastian a sinister look. “Oh, how gracious of you.” He said sarcastically.

But Sebastian wasn't fazed by that comment and winked at Ed. “I Try.”

Edwart sighed, not wanting to fall into Sebastian's seductive behaviour. “He's probably talking like that to everybody… everybody who's been dumb enough to help him.” He thought. "Like me..."

Ed swiftly solved another puzzle. They weren't as challenging as they seemed.

“You are head and shoulders above these bones. Nicely done.” Sebastian complimented again.

Edwart simply smiled before Sebastian had ruined it yet again. “I see why Slytherin's student was so entranced with this place.” Sebastian smiled excitedly.

Edwart groaned. “Sebastian just… shut it. Looks like there's another fight on our hands.”

Sebastian and Edwart entered a big hall where about a dozen spiders were waiting. The fight was intense. Sebastian got slammed against a wall once or twice, but Edwart was the one who got beat around more. Possibly because of his recent hospital stay, he was slower. When the fight finally came to an end, all spiders were dead. Sebastian looked around to make sure they hadn't missed anything while Edwart was sitting on the floor, holding himself by his bleeding shoulder.

“Blast! Are you alright?” Sebastian kneeled beside him.

“S’fine…” Edwart muttered. He took a swig of Wiggenweld as his shoulder wound slowly tied itself up. He chuckled. “For a moment there, I thought that'd never end.”

Sebastian frowned and helped Ed up. “Dead end. Lovely. All that for nothing.”

Edwart smiled comfortingly. “We’ve been here for 5 minutes. Don't give up yet.”

The Hufflepuff student cast a powerful Confringo, burning away spider webs. Under a wall was standing a table with a triangle-shaped object and two notes.

Edwart’s eyes widened as he called for his friend. “Sebastian! The relic. Look.”

“Could it be?” Sebastian came along.

Edwart read the notes thoroughly. “The note and rendition of the relic - it matches. This must be where the student left the relic.”

“I can't believe it. After all this, it lines up. We've really found it!” Sebastian's eyes were lit with excitement.

“What do you suppose is meant by 'the Dark sacrifice required to realise the relic's potential'?” Edwart frowned.

Sebastian shrugged indifferently. “I have no idea, but we're here for the relic.”

“The note advises to leave the relic alone.” Edwart scowled and looked hopefully at Sebastian, but it was no use.

“I assure you, we were meant to find this. For Anne's sake. I'm taking it. Let's get to Feldcroft."

Ed signed heavily but decided it was for the best... to help Anne. Both boys started walking towards the exit.

“I must keep this relic secret. Especially from my uncle. I-... Is that - Ominis?”

<Part 8 /// Part 10>

MASTERLIST

-------------- Author's notes:--------------

Thanks so much for reading Part 9! I'm pretty sure this chapter is gonna be the longest. Woah I added so many pics here! I deliberately made the journal pages look smudged and unreadable (bs they spend most likely ages in that scriptorium book) so it's more realistic. But since im not an ass. I'm leaving the readable version down here:) Eddie freaking out, but yk Sebastian is persuasive. Anyhow, another part is coming soon.

[tomhollandfics]

NOW CLOSED (Masterlist will be posted soon)

WELCOME TO MY VERY OWN 2022 FIC EVENT ♡︎

IF YOU HAPPEN TO WRITE FICS FOR TOM HOLLAND ALREADY, OR WANT TO GET STARTED, THIS IS THE EVENT FOR YOU.

FEW RESTRICTIONS, A SUPPORTIVE COMMUNITY & UNTIL THE 1ST OF MARCH TO SUBMIT A FIC YOU'RE HAPPY WITH.

STEP 1: Choose a prompt or an idea

I do not want to limit creativity, therefore, you can use the suggested prompts below but you are free to write about anything of your choosing - as long as it is about tom holland & respectful.

---

PROMPTS; feel free to combine multiple prompts within one fic

1. "You're not alone, I promise."

2. “How mad would you be if i kissed you?”

3. "Sure, we can snuggle if it will make you feel better."

4. “That was the prettiest sound i’ve ever heard.”

5. "There's no shame in crying. I promise."

6. “I think we just found a new kink.”

7. "That’s the sixth time you’ve complimented me today."

8. “As beautiful as you look, all i want to do is rip that dress off right now.”

9. “If you loved me, you wouldn’t have done it.”

10. "Oh. Oh. Even till now, after all these years, you're still blaming me?"

11. "Leave me alone. That's what you're best at, anyway."

12. “You’re lucky you’re hot.”

13. “Ten? I only need five.”

14. “I act like I'm jealous because I am!”

15. "And risk ruining our friendship?"

16. "Something tells me I'm going to regret this."

17. “I thought bad things only happened to people who deserved it…”

18. “Kiss me like you mean it.”

19. “Come on, love, let’s get you home.”

20. "Now what’s your safe word, baby?”

21. “I can’t believe you remembered.”

22. “Why does it sound like you’re saying goodbye?”

23. "Here’s my hotel room number."

24. “You were always there for me. Let me be there for you.”

25. “Come here and make me.”

---

STEP 2: Begin writing

As I mentioned, I do not want to limit anyone's creativity. Angst, smut and fluff (etc) are all allowed.

Also, you are not restricted to a female reader. Feel free to write about tom and a reader (or an OC character), whether they are male, non-binary, transgender, gay, bisexual...etc

I will try to read through all fics before reblogging & posting them onto a masterlist.

BUT, I will not be judging or scrutinising anyone's work - please do not feel pressured to produce a masterpiece!

However, I will NOT allow disrespectful, bigoted fics to be submitted nor posted on this blog.

To add, this event is solely for Tom Holland fics, not Peter Parker (or any other characters played by Tom Holland) - I apologise to those writers, however I will plan to create another event in the future, dedicated to your work.

But you are more than welcome to write a Tom Holland AU.

NO WORD LIMIT!

---

STEP 3: Submit

Once you're finished writing, post your fic!

Tag me within the post.

Also, use the tag #tomhollandficsevent2022

If you want to, you can send the posts link to me directly. Only do this if you are unsure that I have seen your fic.

I will reblog your fic!! I will also make sure to add the fic to a masterlist that I will create as I begin to receive entries.

SUBMISSIONS NEED TO BE MADE BY THE 1ST OF MARCH!

---

If anyone has any questions, it is probably better to message me privately rather than sending an ask - my inbox is pretty full so I am more likely to see it in my messages.

HAPPY WRITING EVERYONE! x

[space-mermaid-writing]

House Arrest [Loki X Reader] Chapter 2

Summary: You are Clint’s 'little' sister and actually a trained Shield agent. But you gave that up a few years ago and became a Chef, because you wanted a normal live. Then one day Natasha shows up at your door and takes you to the Avenger Tower for a while for security reasons.

Tags: Reader is an former Shield Agent, chef!reader, Reader Barton, 2012 Avenger vibes, everything is still alright, Slice of Life, Avengers Family, Loki has a good heart, still the god of mischief, Slow Burn, mention of food and cooking

Read it on AO3

Chapter 2: Not the new kitchen help

You can now call a cozy apartment with two rooms and a nice bathroom your own. You have stored your things in the bedroom and are now looking around the tower. The living rooms seem to be spread over several levels. Either there are really a lot of people living here or they tried to keep a little space to avoid stepping on each other's toes all the time. Living and working together can be quite a challenge for some people. The floors above consist - judging by the signs - of labs and various development rooms. Most of it is probably technical stuff, but some of the doors also have concerning warnings, and you don't want to spend your first day trying to figure out if they're genuine.

You find the outdoor platform with the big A and see, then it’s connected to some sort of party or lounge room. There are several couch sets and a rather nicely equipped bar. Overall, everything is very spacious and you're sure you can walk around here for a few days without anyone noticing your presence. At least once, you think you've lost your bearings for a moment, but then you find your way back to the elevators. On the other hand, there was surprisingly little going on up here.

All floors below the living area seem to be offices, at least the names of the elevator buttons suggest that. You don't feel like visiting them right now, because the exploration tour has left you pretty hungry. The last meal was also your breakfast this morning and now it's almost afternoon. So you look for the room that interests you the most anyway. And you find it near the lounge: a wonderfully large kitchen with fantastic equipment. You explore it with interest and notice that it‘s visibly little used. Among the people and other beings here, there seems to be no one enjoying cooking. Saving the world probably takes up enough of their time. As you open the refrigerator, a voice suddenly comes from somewhere, startling you briefly at first. "Good afternoon, Miss Barton. If you have any requests regarding the food or ingredients, please let me know." You look around, but can't see anyone. "My name is JARVIS," the voice explains. "I am an A.I. and I am available to assist you." "Uh-huh...hello," you merely reply, processing this information. Jarvis, meanwhile, continues talking. "Welcome to the Tower. The other Avenger members have been notified of your arrival in a memo." "Okay, thanks." It‘s a bit weird talking to a room, but apparently modern technology has already reached the next level here. Hearing nothing more, you start inspecting the contents of the refrigerator. The result is quite sobering. "It's all just fast foods," you grumble. "Would you like to suggest changes in the selection?", Jarvis asks. "Yes! Please and thank you." "You're welcome to make a shopping list, and I'll have everything ordered." Why not? Regardless of whether a computer can really do it, you nod. "Okay." "A personal tablet will be calibrated for you. You can pick it up from Mr. Banner."

A few minutes later you find yourself in the labs on the upper floors. The sterile lit hallway reminds you much more of Shield than the lower floors. You turn a corner and have to go down some stairs that lead you into a large room. Here, tables are jumbled with various types of modern computers and equipment. Further back is a robotic arm soldering a hard drive all by itself with a quiet whir. It’s a dream for any technology enthusiast. From one corner, you hear typing and beeping, followed by quiet murmurs. That's where you turn, looking at the whiteboards on the wall along the way, where complicated calculations and drawings could be seen. Then suddenly, right in front of you, a hologram appears in the air and you stop, rooted to the spot. "Oops!" "Oh, sorry." A head pops up from behind a nearby screen and you recognize Bruce Banner. His face is always shown on the news whenever there's been a shot of Hulk. But now you're more interested in the hologram as you take a closer look. It shows a nebulous, pulsating entity. "What is that?" you ask the scientist. "We got some cosmic stones. This was in one of them." "It's moving. Is it alive?" "Living would be an exaggeration, but there is energy present. My name is Dr. Banner, by the way." He reduzes the size the hologram so it's out of your way. "Barton, nice to meet you." "Clint's sister, I read the file. He never mentioned you though." "I didn't want any attention, but didn't quite work out, I guess." Bruce smiles sympathetically and reaches for a cup of tea, which, judging by his expression after the first sip, seems to be cold. You ask for the tablet you came for, and Bruce looks around searchingly. There are a few of them in the room, but the display of one lights up, drawing your attention. You see your name displayed and simply conclude that it's the right one. Briefly you say thank and goodbye, before you go back to your room and start making a shopping list. Please fresh ingredients and please deliver today.

Afterwards, you browse around a bit. The tablet, like every electronic device in the house, seems connected to the main computer and to Jarvis. You pull up a few files on your new housemates and read them curiously. At least the parts that are publicly available. You also take the opportunity to look for your own name. Because even though you know that your records were officially destroyed when you left, you know that no data is ever really gone. So you're almost surprised when you find only a few sentences about yourself and not even a photo. Mainly it was about your and Clint's entry into Shield at a young age as orphans. You had received a pretty good education, which may have also kept you from going off the rails. Besides hand-to-hand combat and firearms training, your specialty was handling knives, while your brother took up bows and arrows. For foreign missions, you had also had to learn various languages and had chosen the widely spoken Spanish and Russian. But you didn't work for Shield for a long time, instead opting out of your career early on. It just wasn't the life you wanted to lead. So you changed cities and mingled with the civilian population. And before you knew it, your talent with a knife led you into a traditional apprenticeship as a chef. You enjoyed this work more than having to fight to death, and you even expanded your knowledge and skills during a year abroad in France. But there is very little of all this in your records.

You set the tablet aside and stretch out on your new bed. Normally, you would be in full swing at work right now. A glance at the clock reveals that it's already early evening. Rush hour in most of the restaurants. But here? Without a task or a plan, there's not much you can do. On the other hand, a little vacation wouldn't hurt you.

At some point, the tablet gave a soft ping and when you checked, it was a notification that the refrigerator and all the pantries had been restocked. By now you are very hungry and you heard nothing about a joint dinner time, so you decide to cook yourself something. Out of sheer habit and to avoid getting your clothes dirty, you put on a chef's jacket and apron you brought from home and go into the kitchen. There's a radio in one corner that you turn on. Jarvis really did get everything you had asked for. It was a dream come true. Now in a much better mood, you grab a pan and get to work. From the freezer, you pull out a fish, which you gut and fill with fresh herbs. It goes into the pan first. Then it's the turn of the potatoes, which are peeled, boiled and rolled in rosemary.

You're so absorbed in your work - you've just poked a knife into the boiling potatoes to see if they're already done - that you don't notice a visitor, who had entered the kitchen at some point, until he makes himself known. "I'll have the course menu and a white wine to go with it." Somewhat confused, you look up as you hear the man's voice and see Tony Stark standing at the sideboard across from you. He notices your look and returns it with a smile. "I didn't realize we hired a new kitchen help." You frown and take a sharpening rod in your free hand to sharpen your knife while not taking your eyes off Tony. "Oh, I'm not a new kitchen help," you clarify. "I'm a chef." "Excuse me. Then would the chef please serve me the course menu and a white wine?" The trillionaire indicates a polite bow, but you merely turn to the stove and take the potatoes off it. You then retrieve a plate from the cupboard. "Jarvis", you direct your voice to the computer, hoping it’s still listening. "Would you please explain to Mr. Stark that I'm not here to cook for him and that he'll have to order his course menu, if he really wants one, from the Chinese place next door?" "Mr. Stark, I'm supposed to-." "I heard her, Jarvis," Tony interrupts the A.I., eyeing you a little more closely now. "That does make me wonder what you're doing here, Miss...? Aside from the fact that there's no Chinese working next door." "Then you should make one move in there," you replay amused. As you do, you wipe your fingers on the cloth you've hung on the apron at your hip and prep your dish. Just as Tony is about to say something clever, the door opens and another person walks in. You recognize Thor at first glance. "What's that delicious smell in the air?", he asks, looking around curiously. You smile and point to the stove. "I was just cooking. There's still some left for you to take." With that, you want to go to your room, but Tony stops you. "Oh, he gets something, but I don't?", he complains. You shrug your shoulders. "He didn't want a whole menu." With that, you disappear through the door and go back to your living quarters. There you quickly change into something comfy and make yourself comfortable on the couch, where you watch an episode of your favorite show while you eat. A little company would be nice, but you don't feel like meeting more people you don't know yet. And you don't feel like searching for Natasha in this huge complex. So you’re fine with being by your own right own.

After dinner, you continue watching the show, but eventually you realize you're getting tired. It really had been an eventful and long day. So you quickly take your dirty dishes back to the kitchen. But just as you're closing the dishwasher, Tony comes back in and leans against the frame with his arms crossed. "So… you‘re a Barton." Apparently he had spent a few minutes of his precious time gathering information about you and then waited for you to reappear. "Surprised there's another one?" you ask with a smirk. He takes that as a sign that you're not holding a grudge against him. He pushes himself off the door frame and comes closer, now leaning his arms on the kitchen island. "Nothing about Legolas surprises me anymore. Met his wife and kids the other day. Nice family. Are you guys a whole circus?" "Not anymore." You shrug. "So, what’s your deal?", he wants to know. "You left Shield in your early twenties. What's normal life like out there? No one waiting for you to come home?" You turn on the dishwasher and grab a water bottle from the supply. "Life is nice. Often stressful, but I have to worry a lot less about getting killed." You don't answer Tony's last question. It's really none of his business. "That is when you're not being yanked out of that life and brought into the house of superheroes", you add. "You'll get used to it. Both that we're super and that we're heroes. I promise." You laugh at his words. Tony seems to be a real egocentric, but also a humorous person. "Well, let's see", you reply, "Now if the welcome speech is over, I'd like to go to bed." "I won't keep anyone away from their beauty sleep. Good night." You wish him the same, then head back to your room, where you make yourself comfortable on the large bed. The strange surroundings were unfamiliar, but not you don't feel uncomfortable and so you soon fall asleep.

[abbysfreckles]

But I Knew I Was (Not) Out Of Luck – Yelena Belova x Reader

Morocco, 2016. Reader and Oksana are protecting the Red Dust, while Yelena and other Widows are on a mission to kill the two traitors and recover the mysterious substance. Oksana does not die. Neither does Yelena or Reader.

Word count: over 3,200

Warnings: canon typical violence; mentions of blood, guns and knives; swearing; angst; fluff and angst; angst with a happy ending.

A/N: this is an alternative ending for the But I Knew I Was Out Of Luck fic (to the anon who requested a part 2: hope this fits your request!!). same as before, no beta readers, so there might be mistakes (i did fix the mistakes i found in the previous fic tho). i think i took some liberties while talking about the Red Room’s mind control and similar stuff. i tried to revisit what was established in the movie but i gotta admit i didn’t fact check everything i wrote. is this what the kids call poetic license? sorry for taking so long, btw! i kept rereading this and didn’t know if i liked it, but decided to post anyway. if i made any mistakes or you have any suggestions, feel free to message me/ leave an inbox! but, if you do, please be nice. still g/n reader, i think? that’s it, i hope you have a good time reading this!

– They’re here! – Oksana informs. She takes the package, grabs my arm and tows me towards the exit.

In the corridor, where there are no windows and the Widows can’t see what we’re doing, I stop her.

– What are you doing? We have to go now! – She’s trying to conceal it, but I can tell she’s scared. So am I.

– No, you have to go. I have to buy you some extra time. – I free my arm from her grip and walk past her, taking my gun from its holster. I take a look around the corner: the hallway is empty.

– Have you lost your mind? They’re going to kill you!

– Oof, do you really think that little of me? I can put on a good fight. – I smirk, but she doesn’t seem to find it very funny.

She takes a step forward and touches my shoulder, serious expression forcing me to look her in the eyes.

– We need to complete the mission. You and I. – She lifts the package and pointedly looks at it. – This is the only thing that matters. It’s our responsibility to free them. She chose us because she knew we could do it.

– No, Oksana. She chose you. I just tagged along.

– Because I chose you to come with me and help me complete the mission! I need your help.

I smile and place my hand over hers.      

– You don’t. You really don’t, Oksana. You’re more than capable of doing this on your own. She knew this, that’s why she chose you. I know it too, and I believe in you. – She looks sad. It doesn’t seem like she wants to do it on her own. – I am very honored to have been chosen by you, though. Thank you for trusting me.

– Y/N... – She opens her mouth, but no words come out of it. I smile reassuringly and take her hand off of my shoulder.

– Goodbye, Oksana. Take care. – I turn around the corner and run down the stairs. Silently praying for whoever’s listening to watch over her, protect her.

When I reach the street, I slow down my pace and try to blend in. Wouldn’t want to draw unwanted attention. I look back, to check if I’m being followed. Out of nowhere, something hits me and pushes me into the street. And because I’m the luckiest person ever, a car is passing by at the same fucking time. The impact throws me on the ground and I wince in pain. The car speeds away, almost running me over.

– For fuck’s sake. – I say, getting up. Where the fuck is my gun?

– I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there. – Someone says, not sounding sorry at all.

I freeze. I knew Dreykov was a fucking asshole, which is a very generous understatement, but I never thought he had sense of humour. Yet, sending the person I love the most to kill me seems very fitting.

– Yelena. – I say, voice shaking, unable to mask all the feelings running through my head.

Before I can say anything else, she launches forward, knife in hand. Acting on pure reflex, I punch her in the face. Unshaken and now maybe a little angry, she moves her arm swiftly, leaving an ugly cut on my thigh. This isn’t going well. I try to put some distance between us, but she is quick to follow me. She tries to stab me, but the move is too broad. Almost careless and sloppy. It allows me to grab her arm and push her down, subjugating her. She cries out and looks up at me, eyes big. I hesitate. What the fuck am I doing?

Taking advantage of my hesitation, Yelena acts. She drops her knife, catching it with her other hand, and slits my arm. I let go of her and step back, trying to ignore my feelings and focus. I can’t let her mess with me like that, I have a mission to complete. I have to win Oksana as much time as possible. Just then, I see my gun where it must have fallen when the car hit me. Unfortunately, Yelena follows my gaze and sees it too. We both make a run for it. Desperately, I throw myself on the ground, reaching for the gun, hoping I don’t have to pull the trigger. Yelena does the same and we wrestle on the ground.

Here’s the thing about the mind control the Red Room has over the Widows: it makes them ruthless. Removes all doubts and distractions, leaving only heartless strategy and lethal training. It doesn’t matter how hard I’m fighting: I don’t want to harm Yelena. She, on the other hand, doesn’t have much of a choice. I manage to grab the gun and she hits my nose, hard. It’s definitely bleeding. She then climbs on top of me, keeping me down effortlessly, and tries to reach for the gun. As a last resource, and more desperate than I’d like to admit, I point the gun at her.

Her expression changes and she stops. She leans back, sitting on my stomach, and attently watches me. My hands are shaking, my finger on the trigger. Then, she laughs. But it doesn’t really sound like her. It’s cold and mean, a look of disdain on her face.

– C’mon now, love. We both know you would never hurt me. – She moves, knife hovering just above my chest, but without actually touching me. – You don’t have the guts to do it.

I look at her. I wonder how much of this is the mind control and how much is actually her. I think for a moment and toss the gun away, as far as I can. There really isn’t anything left to do but accept my fate. After all, she is right: I would never hurt her.

– Go ahead. – I gently put my hand over her’s, bringing it forward, placing the tip of the knife right above my heart.

Her eyes go big and she frowns. Behind them, I can see the shadow of doubt. Maybe she expected me to try and resist her? To fight back? Well, I can’t. I really can’t. She narrows her eyes and leans a little bit closer.

– I’ll rip your heart out, then. What do you think of that?

She says it with conviction, but it seems a little fake. Or I’m just seeing things my own way, trying to convince myself she wouldn’t hurt me either.

I stare into her eyes, thinking a hundred thoughts and feeling a thousand emotions. Fuck it. If this is the day that I die, if this is the moment when it all ends, then at least I’ll be honest. I’ll die anyway, sure, but at least I’ll stay true to myself.

– My heart is yours. It’s always been yours to do as you please. – Her eyes widen again. She definitely wasn’t expecting me to say that.

It feels weird to say these things now, especially considering she probably won’t even care. It is the absolute truth, though. I’d willingly give it to her, if she asked. I huff out a little chuckle and smile sadly.

– And honestly? I’d rather die by your hands than anyone else’s. I’d rather your green eyes be the last thing I’ll ever see. That is, if you’d allow me that luxury.

Her eyes are hard to read. I can’t tell if she was touched by what I said or if she’s still trying to process my lack of resistance. But at least I can tell she doesn’t seem to be pleased.

I raise my hand tentatively towards her face, but stop midway.

– Can I? – I ask for her consent. It seems to be more important than ever now.

She doesn’t say anything, but I’m pretty sure I could see tears starting to pool her eyes. Or I was just imagining them, trying to make myself feel better about being murdered by the mind controled version of the love of my life.

I start to bring my hand closer to her face, slow enough so she could stop me if she didn’t want me to touch her. Again, she doesn’t say anything. She just looks at me. When my touch finally reaches her skin, she closes her eyes and her expression seems to relax ever so slightly.

I gently cup her face, running my thumb over her cheek. My other hand still over hers, over her knife above my heart. I try to memorize all the little details of her. The tip of her nose, the curve of her lashes, the arch of her brows, the color of her lips. Her mouth agape, the same way she’s always done it when anticipating something. Her hair was in her classical hairdo, pretty blonde hair carefully tucked in pretty Dutch braids. I’ve always loved the way she braided her hair. Mindlessly, I tuck in behind her ear a little rebel strand, something that was more muscle memory than conscient action. My fingers brush past the piercing at the top of her ear. A stupid smile dances on my lips. She’s still using the jewelry I gave her. When I look back at her face, her eyes are open and she’s carefully watching me. I’ve always loved her eyes. Before meeting her, I wasn’t that big of a fan of green. But now it was my favorite color. Not just any green though, no, the specific shade of green of her irises. It’s so fucking beautiful. I sigh and smile, looking at her like she’s the most breathtaking thing I’ve ever seen my entire life. And it does feel like I’m out of breath. I don’t know if it’s because of the tears I’m trying so hard to hold back, the terrifying realization that I’m probably about to die or the overwhelming love I feel for her, but it feels really hard to breathe. I take one last look at her face.

– Yelena. – I say her name with all the softness and adoration I have in me. – I love you. More than anything in the entire world. And if there are other worlds, other universes after this one, I will love you there too.

Her breath hitches and for a fraction of second she seems vulnerable. Then, something breaks the moment. She looks up, as if someone had called out her name. She covers her ear with her hand and looks around, searching. Then she looks at me.

– I have one of the targets. The other one got away. – Oh, so that’s what she heard. She listens very closely to whatever she’s being told and then nods. – I’ll neutralize this target and meet you there.

Yeah, this will definitely be the day that I die.

She looks down and I feel the tip of the knife digging into my chest, a light sting on my skin. But it doesn’t go any deeper. She looks back up at me. Unsure and maybe even unwilling. I know that if she tries to resist the mind control she’s probably going to be eliminated. I can’t let her die too.

– It’s okay. – I say, trying to sound reassuring. – Just let me take one last look at you, yeah?

As much as I’d love to just forget the world and let this moment drag on forever, it would be a very selfish thing to do. So I take a deep breath, bracing myself for what’s about to happen, and nod, giving her permission to finish it.

She sniffs softly and starts to press the knife down. Just then, I see Oksana creeping up behind her. Before I can even say anything, she sprays Yelena with the Red Dust. It takes her completely off guard. She shakes her head and grimaces, bringing her hands to her face. Fingers over her eyelids, like she’s trying to brush the Dust away. When she opens her eyes again, they shide red for a second, quickly returning to their usual green. I watch her every move, absolutely still. Anticipation burns me from the inside out. Please come back to me, the silent prayer echoes my mind. Please, please come back to me.

Then, she looks down. She seems confused and disoriented, but lucid. I think it worked.

– Y/N. – Yelena breathes.

She drops her knife and cups my face with both hands. I smile, incredulous. It worked. It really worked. Yelena smiles back and pulls me up, hugging me tight. I wrap my arms around her, holding her as close as I can. No mind control or crazy science could get her out of my embrace, not even Dreykov or the Taskmaster. She pulls back and holds my face in her hands again, looking soft and content. Then, she frowns.

– What happened to your nose? – She inquires, worried. Her frown deepens and she starts checking me for other bruises. She grabs my arm and sees the cut. – Was it me?

I shake my head and try to hide my arm behind my back, but she holds my hand, keeping my arm where it is.

– It doesn’t matter. – I answer. She opens her mouth to protest, but I’m faster. – It wasn’t your fault. You were being mind controlled and I was hurting you. You had no choice.

Judging by her expression, she’s not convinced.

– Hey, this is nothing compared to the injuries I get from training with you. I’ll survive. – I joke, trying to make her smile. She smirks, but still looks upset. – Please, Lena. I’m okay, really. You’re free to make your own choices now and that makes it all worth it. I’d have laid down my life for you, if that’s what it’d have taken.

She smiles, eyes watery.

– I’m glad that wasn’t necessary.

We both laugh.

– Yeah, me too.

She leans in to kiss me, but stops a mere inch away, letting me decide if I want to close the distance or not. I chuckle and press my lips on hers, ever so softly.

– I don’t mean to ruin the mood, but we should go look for the others. – Oksana throws an empty little vial to us. – I’m pretty sure we’ve got enough Red Dust for everyone.

Yelena looks up at her.

– And I happen to know exactly where they are.

She gets up and offers me her hand. I take it and she pulls me up. The three of us jog down the street, to where Yelena was supposed to meet the others. Yelena is still holding my hand.

We stop at an alley, a block away from the building.

– They’re supposed to be at the rooftop, waiting for me. – She says, focused.

Yelena and Oksana quickly put together a mission plan, but I just stay there, quietly listening.

– Wait. – I say, squeezing Yelena’s hand to get her attention. – Before we do this, I... I need to talk to you. It’s important.

– I’ll check our surroundings, see if it’s all clear. – Oksana says, giving us some privacy.

We watch her walk away. Then, Yelena turns to me, apprehensive.

– Is everything okay? – She asks. Her thumb is making small circles in the back of my hand.

– I’m sorry. – I blurt out. I avert my eyes, ashamed. – I’m sorry for leaving you behind. I should have brought you with us. I should have taken you out of that...

– Stop, stop. – Yelena says. She brings her hand to my chin, tilting it up slightly, making me look at her. – It would have been risky and could have backfired. And if it did, Dreykov would have the Red Dust and you and Oksana would be dead. You did what you had to do. And it all worked out in the end.

– What if it didn’t? What if something happened to you? I’d never forgive myself.

– But nothing happened, Y/N. I’m okay. – She brings our linked hands to her lips, planting a soft kiss on the back of my hand.

She looks into my eyes, lips still pressed on my skin. I can’t help but wonder what if something did happen to her. What if they had tortured her to try and discover where Oksana and I could have gone? What if they had made her pay for what the two of us did? This train of thought reaches its inevitable conclusion: what if they had killed her?

My eyes teared up for what felt like the hundredth time and I slowly opened my mouth to speak.

– What if they did something to you?

Yelena’s expression changed slightly and she let go of my hand. I didn’t even have time to miss the warmth of her touch though, ‘cause she immediately pulled me closer and held me tight. We stayed like this, in silence, for a little while. Dwelling on each other’s presence, lost in our own thoughts.

– If I’m being honest... – Yelena stopped speaking and took a deep breath.

I stayed still, anxiously waiting. I didn’t know what she was about to say, but her tone made my stomach drop.

– I was angry at first. Very angry. I couldn’t fight the feeling that you had abandoned me. That you had decided I wasn’t worth the trouble and just left. – She scoffs and shakes her head slightly. – I know that sounds stupid. You left because you had a mission. And even if there was no mission, you would’ve left because you wanted a better life. You know, not to be mind controlled most of the time. But I just couldn’t help the bitter feeling that you had abandoned me.

I wanted to say something, but I kept quiet. Instead, I hid my face on the crook of her neck and closed my eyes. If feelings could kill, the guilt I was feeling right now would’ve gotten me dead in her arms in no time. I wanted to be able to go back in time, find a different way to have dealt with this. Maybe I could have left her a note, a sign, anything that showed her how much I loved her, made her know that I would be coming back for her and, in the meantime, would be thinking of her at every step of the way. I did this for Oksana and the others, of course, but I also did it for her. It’s always for her.

Yelena moves back just far enough for her to look me in the eyes.

– The only thing that matters now is that we’re both here, alive. Whatever it was that made it all work, fate, luck, the power of love... – She smirks. It brings a little smile to my face. – What matters is that everything worked out. Things could have gone wrong, but they didn’t. We’re together now and I’m sure we can handle pretty much anything life throws our way.

I nod, slowly. She’s right. Countless things could have gone wrong. She could have killed me, had Oksana taken a second longer to find us. But it all worked out. We’re together now.

– I’ll never leave your side again. Ever. Wherever you go, I’ll follow.

She smirks again, goofy expression on her face.

– Oh, yeah?

– Yeah. You’re stuck with me, Belova.

She smiles and leans in, pressing our foreheads together.

– Sounds good to me.

[imagines-r-s]

sticking it

chapter 9 

a/n: idk why this chapter took so long, but here it is. for reference - in gymnastics, US Championships are the last meet before Olympic Trials, they’re a two day competition. any feedback is welcome. i’m kinda upset that this series (or at least this part) is almost done, but there is more to come with this series i promise. also had to repost bc it wasn’t showing up in the tags 

taglist: @butgilinsky @barbienoturbby @sunsetholland @lovenhlboys @sortagaysortahigh @hockey-racing-fubol @oopsiedoopsie23 @iwantahockeyhimbo @dreamsndior @itsurgirlgracie @heartshapedkissxs @lwstuff @handwrittenheroes

warnings: uh, i don’t think there’s anything, but if i miss something just let me know (the jamie mentioned is jamie oleksiak, not j b*nn)

sticking it masterlist

wc: 5.8

(not my gif)

“Are you sure that you have everything?” Joel asked for the twentieth time in the past hour, “we can run back to yours if you need anything else”

“I feel like you’re just trying to get me to stay with you longer,” you said, skeptically.

“Is it working?”

“No, Bee, I have to leave at some point,”  you said, putting another bag of yours in his car,”I won’t be gone long.”

“Yeah, but you’ll be closer to the Stars and that has me worried,” he said, causing you to chuckle. 

“You worried about Seggy? Or Roope? Or Big Rig? Or Mi-”

“Okay, I get it.”

“Don’t worry your pretty little head about it, I love you and only you, shawty. Besides, I can only tolerate Texas weather for so long,” you said, leaning up to kiss him on the cheek.

“I love you, too, shawty,” he paused,”Wait,- that was rude.”

After packing the last of your bags into the car, you made your way to the airport to meet Marcus and Michelle. Once you arrived at the airport, Joel parked the car before the two of you headed into the airport. The four of you caught up for a while before Marcus suggested giving you and Joel time to say goodbye. 

“Is this how it feels when me and the guys leave for the road?” Joel asked, softly. 

“Yeah,” you said, smiling sadly. 

“Well, good thing I’m the one on the road all the time, I mean, I don’t like leaving you, but when I’m leaving it’s a different feeling, you know.”

“Well glad it makes you happy, buddy.”

“Did you just buddy me?” Joel asked, incredulously. 

“Did I?” you asked, laughing as Joel gasped in shock.

“Wow, I see how it is. I’ll remember that.”

“Go ahead, babe. Remember it however you want,” you paused when you saw the sad look on his face, reaching to hold his face in your hands, “hey, I’m only a text away, I might not be right here, but I will answer as soon as I can and we’ll facetime as much as you want these next few days.”

Joel nodded before looking up and seeing Marcus and Michelle headed your way, “we hate to cut this short, but we have to get going pretty soon.”

“I know I asked, but do you really have to go?”

“Yeah, Bee, I really have to go.”

“You better kick ass out there or else you’re just leaving for nothing,” he said, jokingly, “but honestly, I wish you the best of luck - I know you don’t need it, but I’ll say it anyway. Make sure to tell Nicole I said good luck and please make sure to wipe that smug look off Kathryn's face. Okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” you said, wrapping your arms around him as he pressed kiss to the top of your head. “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you, too, but if you don’t go, the only thing you’ll be missing is your flight.”

“Wow, Bee, you are so funny.” 

“Well, one of us has to be the funny one in the relationship. Your mom jokes only get you so far far in life, babe,” he said, causing you to elbow him in the stomach. 

“I’m leaving now. I love you and I will text you when I land,” you leaned up for a quick goodbye kiss before grabbing your carry-on bag and heading to your gate. You avoided looking back, knowing that if you did, both of you wouldn’t let the other leave. 

“I think you chose a good one,” Marcus said once the three of you had sat down. 

“What?” you asked, shocked. 

“Joel. He seems like a good guy. He clearly cares about you and I can see that you care a lot about him, too. He clearly makes you happy,” Marcus added. 

Heat rushed up your face, to which you simply looked out the window, “yeah, he’s a good guy.”

“A cute one, too,” Michelle interrupted. 

“Yes, that too. But Michelle, you better lay off,” the three of you laughed as the flight attendants started to announce the safety procedures for your flight. The three of you did your own thing the rest of the flight: Marcus planning out how podium training would go, Michelle analyzing your routines, and you sleeping.

“Alright, so as soon as we land, we get luggage and go to our hotel. There is a small media event tomorrow morning before podium training, then podium training, then probably some more media. You will have the rest of the night to do whatever, I know you’ll probably go see your Dallas friends and that’s fine, just make it back in time. Then, Friday is the first day of competition, Saturday is the second day, then we have some free time Sunday,” Marcus read off to you, even with you half asleep. 

“Sounds lovely,” you grumbled. 

…..

“So, y/n, with your injury being a top priority, how different have practices been since you are still somewhat in recovery?” one of the journalists asked. You had stayed prepared for a multitude of questions having to do with your injury, so this question had an easy response.

“I would say, it’s definitely a totally new experience. I’ve had to tailor my focus to other aspects of this sport since the start of my recovery, whether that be drills, more conditioning, or changing up my routines. My team and I definitely have figured out what things work and what doesn’t and we continue to learn as I continue training,” you answered, swiftly. 

“Now obviously, you were the highest scorer in most of your competitions, even before your injury, how has competition changed for you? And what has inspired you to train harder?” another journalist asked. 

“I have to say, competition is slightly more nerve-wracking than before. I mean getting injured at a major competition definitely changes perspective for all aspects of it. I feel that I have to be more cautious when performing, whereas before I would just go with the motions. Something that’s inspired me has been that my competitors have continued training, I have a fair amount of competition - all of which are excellent athletes - which has helped motivate me a lot, but I also have an amazing support system back home who have made sure to give me that extra motivation when I need it,” you smiled. 

“Now, having to deal with that support system at home, who and how have they influenced your decisions of your journey through recovery?” which was the first question that made you smile. 

“Well first, a huge shoutout to my family, especially my cousin, Kevin. Without his support, I wouldn’t have ever tried to get back in the gym, he’s been there this whole time and I couldn’t be more grateful. Um, my coaches were so supportive of my comeback; my physical trainor, Adrian, who told me all the doctors were wrong and gave me the reality checks I needed; the whole Philadelphia Flyers roster and their families cheered me on the whole time, especially my boyfriend, Joel Farabee. My friends, my teammates, all of them pushed me where I needed to be,” you said, gratefully. 

“Thank you for your time, y/n. We wish you the best of luck this weekend,” the main announcer said to you before you went off to podium training. 

Marcus and Michelle had both told you only to warm up simplified versions of your routine, so that you could bring shock factor when you were actually performing. You had upgraded almost all of your tumbling back to where it was before injury, but no one needed to know that besides you and those in your gym. Podium training had gone very well, better than you had anticipated, so you were looking forward to how championships would go. 

As you packed up your gym bag and grabbed your phone, you saw all the messages you had from the Flyers group chat you had somehow found your way to. 

Bee: did you guys see that too?

Tiki Bar: if we are talking about the same thing, i think we did.

Patti Lapone: did she actually say nice things about us?

Kev: i really think the texas heat is getting to her already

G: she’s probably just feeling under the weather about competition, otherwise we might want to check if she is okay

Scotty: i think i misheard or i got hit in the head and didn’t realize it

Frosty: hell has frozen over

Bee: haha. frost. frozen. get it

Tiki Bar: beezer. 

G: i’ll make you do laps if you make another frost joke

Laughing at the texts in the group chat in reaction to your interview, you simply typed up a simple response: this is what i get when i’m nice, now you know why i’m not like this all the time. 

Luckily for you, you didn’t have to do any media after podium training, so you were able to leave whenever you wanted to. After checking with Marcus and Michelle, you made sure it was alright that you went off to go see Tyler and the rest of the guys. Assuming that they would be at practice, after changing out of your leo, you took the drive to the Stars practice facility.

Having come to Fort Worth so much for gymnastics and Dallas for a few hockey games, you had run into some of the Stars roster on multiple occasions. By the third time you had ran into them, and this time ran into was a very literal statement, you had exchanged social medias and most of the roster kept an eye out for any updates in your gymnastics career. During your recovery, the whole team constantly asked for updates about how you were and how gymnastics was going. 

Once you parked, you quietly made your way inside - not wanting to interrupt the practice. There were a few officials walking around, but most either paid you no mind or recognized you from times before you had been here. Walking towards the rink, your eyes settled on the boys doing laps for the last part of practice. It wasn’t until most of the guys were only talking and about to get off the ice that they noticed you. 

Tyler was the first to notice you, smiling and waving towards you, which caused most of the team to follow where he was looking and notice you. As the team headed to the locker room to change, you simply waited on one of the benches for them.

“I feel like you only came all this way to see my dogs,” Tyler said, making his way towards you. 

“No, I would never do such a thing, I obviously came here to say hi to you,” you stood up to give him a hug. 

“Mhm, whatever you say. Didn’t you have podium training today? How’d it go?”

“Well, it went pretty well actually. I did a few of my dismounts, but kept most of my landings safe just to be careful. But other than that everything went well.”

“As long as you kick ass tomorrow, I’m fine,” he said, honestly, “do you have anything else to do for the rest of the day or did you just come to say hi?”

“Well, I have no plans for the rest of the day, but I don’t want to intrude on any team plans.”

“You know you would never be intruding on anything with us, even if you are dating a Flyer,” Jamie O said from behind you. 

“God, Jamie, what the fuck? Where’d you come from?”

“Your mom’s house,” he said, earning a fist bump from Tyler. 

“I can’t even be upset, that was a good one,” you smiled as Jamie hugged you,”and don’t bring Joel into this.”

“My condolences.”

“Condolences? No one died?” you questioned.

“You are dating someone that plays for the Flyers,” Tyler said. 

“Damn, that’s harsh,” you replied. 

“Anyways, moving on. Me and a few other guys were coming over to mine for lunch and to hangout, if you want to come you are welcome to,” Tyler said to which you simply nodded. 

“Is that who I think it is?” another familiar voice rang out, causing you to whip your head around to see Roope and Jake heading your way. 

“Well, if you thought it was me, then you would be correct, my friend,” you retaliated. 

“I’m surprised they let you in here, considering you are dating a Flyer,” Otter said, jokingly. 

“Quit bringing the fact that I’m dating Bee into the conversation.”

“At least Nicole is in the safe zone,” Roope said, causing your eyes to widen, “y/n. What was that?”

“What was what?” you questioned as Roope simply narrowed his eyes.

“You did the thing.”

“What are you talking about, bestie?” 

“Oh, you have a habit of your face changing when you know something that will ruin the whole perspective or something or if you know a secret that will change the entire story. Very entertaining and concerning that you didn’t know,” Tyler added. 

“Um, well, didn’t expect to be psychoanalyzed by a bunch of hockey players today, but here we are.”

“Ok, I think we should head to mine and then, we can continue psychoanalyzing you,” Tyler suggested to which you all agreed. Roope, who had gotten a ride from Tyler in the morning, immediately hopped into your car as soon as you unlocked it. 

“What’s up with Nicole?” he asked as soon as you started driving. 

“What happened to hello? How are you?” you joked. 

“Listen, I’m asking now because I don’t want to talk about this with the guys there. But what did you mean?” he said, causing you to take a deep breath. It wasn’t like Roope and Nicole were ever together, but it was always an unspoken fling of sorts, that they never made official. 

“Look,-”

“Please, just tell me what’s happening,” he pleaded.

“Nicole and Nolan are sort of together,” you rushed out, causing a moment of silence to break out. You didn’t know what to expect as a reaction, considering they weren’t official and hadn’t really talked since the last time you and her were in Texas.

“Is she happy?” 

“Yeah, she’s happy.”

“Okay, that’s all I care about,” he said simply, which made your heart almost break for one of your closest friends. 

…..

Being able to spend time with some of your close friends that you hadn’t seen in a while was just what you needed to destress about championships. Maybe an intense game of uno with five of the most competitive people was exactly what some might call a destressor, but here you were. 

Tyler threw down his cards as he stood up dramatically, “no, because there is no way that a.) she already has an uno and that b.) all of you used your draw two cards against me.”

“Don’t be upset, Ty, that’s just how the game of uno is sometimes,” you replied, hiding a laugh. 

“Oh, shut up. I think you guys cheated,” Tyler accused. 

“I think you just don’t know how to play uno,” Jamie mumbled.

“Oh, yeah, real funny. I think you all teamed up against me and Jake dealt that way on purpose.”

“And we all think, you just can’t accept a loss in uno,” Roope added. 

“Fine, let’s settle this like men,” Tyler grabbed all the cards, attempting to shuffle them before accepting he couldn’t shuffle and handing them over to you to shuffle, “I��m watching you.”

“Oh, wow, so scared,” quickly shuffling them, doing a little bit more than usual to get Tyler off your case, you handed them back to him, “there you go.”

Another final round of uno, which ended up with you and Roope head to head as far as who would win, while Tyler had ended up with at least 15 cards to which Jamie was the first to speak up, “I think we should end here before someone gets hurt.”

“No, no, we’re fine. It’s fine. y/n, take your turn,” he said, eyes narrowing as he watched from beside you. Even if it was your last card, you dropped the draw 4, which made Tyler draw more cards. 

“Damn, that sucks,” you said, hiding a laugh. 

“What was that, y/n?” Tyler said.

“I said, damn, that sucks,” you repeated, watching Tyler closely as he stood up quickly once again, before practically chasing you. “Tyler, it’s just uno. Stop chasing me.”

“Oh, wow, ‘damn, that sucks’” Tyler mocked. 

As the other three watched, Jamie just grabbed the bowl of popcorn as they watched their friends running around chasing each other. “I see why we don’t play uno much,” Jake said. 

“Yep. Exactly. But no one listened when I advised against it,” Jamie said, taking a drink of his beer. 

“Tyler, watch yourself,” you said, as he stood on the opposite side of the couch. He started running one way, as you ran the other to avoid him, but he quickly sidestepped and caught up to you. Practically throwing you over his shoulder, he made his way out to the pool, “Tyler, let’s not do anything crazy here.”

“Oh, you mean like hold a draw four card until the end of the game,” Tyler said, as he tossed you into the deep end of his pool. 

“Children. Literal children,” Roope said, shaking his head, going to grab you a towel. 

Rising up from the water and quickly moving the hair out of your face, you swam over to where Tyler was, “hey, can you help me out?”

“Nah, I’m not falling for that one,” he stated. 

“Seriously, I won’t do anything right now, I promise,” you said, as you saw him reach his arm out to which you quickly grabbed and stood out of the pool. Walking towards Roope, who had grabbed you a towel, you turned back around to see Tyler still walking near the pool. Using this to your advantage, you ran and pushed Tyler into the pool. “Sorry, bestie,” you said, running to get the towel from Roope and running back in the house. 

After getting changed into one of Tyler’s extra shirts he had lying around, you were just hanging out with the guys when a familiar contact flashed on the screen to FaceTime, Jake who was right next to you immediately noticed, “ooh, better go talk to your man, y/n.”

“Shut the literal fuck up,” you called back, standing up to go the kitchen for privacy. Answering, you noticed that Joel was at Nolan and Kevin’s apartment, “were you that lonely without me, babe?”

“No, well maybe, but I’m helping them set up for the watch party tomorrow,” Joel said, taking a seat at their kitchen island, “how’d podium training go?”

“It went really well actually, I didn’t work the 3.5 just so that way I have something over their heads, you know. But other than that, it was all good. How are things at home?”

“Well, I mean no one is dead, which is always good. Um, debated getting a dog, my mom called, I told her about you. Uh, already told you about the watch party. I don’t think anything else interesting happened,” he said, shrugging as if he hadn’t just mentioned bringing you up to his mom. 

“Wait, you told your mom about me?”

“Well, she does follow me on Instagram, so after seeing the post she texted me asking and then she asked while we were on the phone. She wished you good luck, by the way. She’s  also visiting here with my dad in a few weeks and I’d really love it if you would meet them,” he said, shyly.

“Uh, yeah, yeah, of course,” you rushed out, hoping you didn’t sound as nervous as you were. 

“That sounded very unsure.”

“No, it’s fine. I just have never been at the spot in a relationship where I meet the parents, I’m just nervous. I don’t want to mess it up.”

“Babe, my mom already loves you, she was getting on my case about not telling her, but she already thinks very highly of you and I definitely hyped you up a little bit. You have nothing to worry about,” he reassured you, which made you smile. 

“Hey, y/n/n,” Kevin yelled. 

“Hey, Kev.”

“You were very nice in your interview today, it had all of us worried,” Kevin said, which caused you to roll your eyes in response. 

“Hey, I can be nice sometimes.”

“On very rare occasions, yes,” Joel added. 

“Whatever.” As you talked a little while longer with the guys, eventually Roope and Tyler had come in to say hi to everyone as well, which had you dying laughing as both of them gave the ‘you hurt her, we fly to Philly and hurt you’ talk that almost everyone had given him. 

Telling Joel you would call him back whenever you made it back to your hotel, you stayed with the guys for another couple of hours before heading back to your hotel. Nicole had spent most of the day after podium training resting and had met you in the hotel lobby when you got back.  

“So,- “ she didn’t even have to finish her sentence before you knew what she was saying. 

“Roope is doing good, he said he hopes things are going well,” you said, watching as a small smile crept up her face. 

“Well, good to know. Did you know KD is also staying at this hotel?”

“Well, considering this is the host hotel and most competitors are here, I am not all that shocked.”

“Yeah, but you probably didn’t know she’s legit a few rooms away from us, did ya?”

“No, guess not,” you said, “how’d you find that one out?”

“Well, let me set the scene for you. I go to get ice and then I hear her talking with, uh, whatever her name is, Callie or Carly, it starts with a C. Anyways, they were talking about you and me and how our skills have been less than recently and all this stuff about you not catching up to where you were - which I found so fucking funny because who has won gold at the past few meets? Not her. Anyways, all is fair in the sport of gymnastics, but I’m just excited to see her reaction to you doing the 3.5.”

“Damn, no pressure there, Nic.”

“Okay, but the thing is, you have the skill,” Nicole said, as you got into the elevator. “You have it down. It’s all up here, in your cranium,” she said, pointing to your head. 

“Alright, let’s just go to bed now,” you said, slowly removing her hand and opening the door to your hotel room. 

…..

“Hello everyone and welcome to Day One of the 2021 US Gymnastics Championships. We are very excited to see how today’s competition goes as this competition will decide who makes it onto the National Team and who will qualify for Olympic Trials,” Joel heard the announcer say as he made his way to sit with everyone in the living room. 

“Did you talk to her this morning?” Claude asked from beside him. 

“Yeah, usual pre-comp anxieties. Nolan talked to her and Nicole to give the usual pep talk and then we talked for a while on their way to the arena,” Joel answered, looking back to the TV to see you prepping for bars, “she said podium training went well, but Kathryn was talking shit, so all I know is she better kick her ass.”

“You know she will, it happens everytime. She gets in her head and still does amazing, just a casual Tuesday,” Scott added. 

“It’s not Tuesday?” Travis questioned.

“Yes, I know,” Scott said, confusing everyone. 

“Alright, moving on,” Joel reiterated. 

“And starting on bars, we have y/n y/l/n. Now if you remember, less than a year ago, y/n was injured at another competition doing a beam dismount that she might be competing in today’s competition. She is definitely one to watch as she has a reputation of scoring high in these meets, before and after her return. Her teammate, Nicole Carter, will be following up.”

Joel watched as you stepped away from the chalk box to start your routine, he watched intently as you jumped from the springboard to reach the high bar. He watched intently as you went through your routine. Release skills. Giants. Pirouettes. More release skills. More giants. Dismount. Stuck landing. 

“A great start to Day 1 for y/n, who seems pretty proud of how that routine went,” the announcer said, “rotation two will be beam, where we might see that 3.5 twist, which is currently in the process of being named by Kathryn Davis, who was the first to compete it at a major competition. Now the question everyone is wondering is will we see this skill from y/n today?”

“She’s doing it. Fucking dumbass,” Joel grumbled at the announcer. 

“Damn, Beezer, tell them how you really feel,” Travis replied, as everyone else laughed at Joel’s behavior before watching Nicole compete. Nicole’s routine ended with a stuck landing, the camera following her as she made her way off the platform and hugged you before the two of you did your secret handshake.

Knowing the next event was beam, Joel waited as other competitors did their routines as you were warming up. He knew this moment would make or break how the rest of the meet went and with this only being your second event, it needed to go well. 

Everyone watched anxiously as you saluted the judges, shaking your hands out before you reached to mount the beam. You took a deep breath before actually starting your routine. Starting the beginning choreography, you kept your movements sharp and clean. All the skills in your routine were sharp - doing this so if the dismount didn’t go well, it hopefully wouldn’t affect your score too much. 

Joel had memorized your routines, knowing you were approaching your dismount, he saw your movements become slightly hesitant. Watching as you did a quick pivot on the beam to prep for the dismount, he watched you take a deep breath. 

“C’mon, babe. You got it,” he said, and by whatever power was listening he watched your lips twitch up to a smile as you started your dismount. Going for the round-off and starting the twists, you did the three and a half twists, opening up to find your landing, and stuck your dismount. Joel’s smile grew even more when he saw how happy you were with your routine.

The rest of Day 1 of Championships went well for both you and Nicole; the two of you ending in the first and place spot in all around, with Kathryn following close behind. After the competition, both of you had your media conferences before you made your way back to the hotel. As both of you checked your phone, you saw the multiple notifications from various social medias.

“Dude, did you see what Ryanne posted?” Nicole asked, a look on her face that you couldn’t easily recognize. 

“No, hold on,” you opened Instagram to see she had tagged you in multiple posts on her instagram story: starting off with a picture of all the guys wearing a jersey with your and Nicole’s name on it, a picture of all the guys watching warms ups intently, a video of Joel and Travis debating the name of a skill from Nicole’s routine (Travis was right), a video of Joel watching you do your beam routine and cheering you on right as you go for your dismount, and then a video of everyone cheering as you and Nicole as they announced the end of day 1.

…..

After falling asleep with Joel on FaceTime, you woke up to your 6am alarm to get ready for Day 2 of championship, Joel - who had told you he would wake up with you - was still sound asleep. Getting you and Nicole an apple from the lobby, you talked to a few of your competitors and a few fans before heading back to yours and Nicole’s room. 

“Wake up, bitch, it’s Day 2 of Championships,” you said, jumping to lay next to Nicole on her bed.

“Leave me to die here, I don’t want to go. USAG can suck a homeless man’s dick,” she mumbled into the pillow. 

“That’s truly something, wait til the media teams hear about that one,” you joked, only to get a glare sent your way. 

“You know what? You can suck on one, too,” she responded, pulling the blanket over her head. 

“Well at least, there's less competition,” to which she quickly peaked out of the blanket.

“Oh, you wish. We’re neck and neck this time, so we’ll see who gets bragging rights.”

“Well if you don’t get out of bed, then we’ll never know,” you said, to which she only sent a glare your way. 

“Do we really have to get up and compete today? Do you think we could petition to reschedule?”

“I mean, I’m sure if we talked to people, we’d get a lot of signatures, but I don’t think it would go over well,” you said, grabbing your garment bag that held your leo for today, “I’m going to go get ready because I know if we end up talking to Joel and Nolan first, we won’t be ready in time.”

After you got ready, both you and Nicole got your pep talk from Nolan and Bee. On the way to the arena, both of you got a bunch of good luck messages - not just from your friends and family, but also from teammates and even some from most of the Stars roster. You had a feeling in your gut that today would be a good day. 

….. 

“Alright folks, Day 2 of Championships have been off to a great start and are about to come to a close. With Nicole Carter in first with a 57.605 All-Around score and Kathryn Davis in second with a 57.1, Cassie Riley in third with a 56.2, it comes down to the final rotations. y/n y/l/n is one of the last to go on floor today, who will need a score of at least a 13.5 to get first,” the announcer said. 

“And compared to her average score, this will be easily attainable. If she scores at least a 14.5, she’ll be first overall for both days of competition. She already has a for sure spot at Trials, even when you don’t consider scores. As long as she is able to hit all elements of this routine, she’ll be fine,” another announcer said. 

“Ok, you’re good, you just have to hit this routine and there’s no doubt you’ll make it to where you want to be. Deep breaths, Twinkle Toes,” Marcus said. 

Walking up the platform to get up to the floor, you took your spot at the edge of the floor, ready to salute the judge, and get the last meet of championships out of the way. After anxiously waiting, the judge finally saluted. Entering the floor with a determined walk, you took your spot waiting for the familiar sound of your floor music to ring out.

That familiar feeling of doing the sport you loved, once again, rushed through your veins. Block everything out and complete the routine, that’s all you had to do. Going to your starting pose, the music started. Going through the familiar motions of your routine, you stuck your first tumbling pass. Then came the leaps and jump sequence and all that was in between, with the additional three tumbling passes. 

You didn’t give yourself a chance to overthink about your routine, you knew that it wouldn’t benefit you in any way, but as you stepped off the floor you knew that you did what you could. As soon as you made it back to where Marcus and Nicole were sitting, you waited to see what your score was. 

Joel and everyone watching at home watched as you sat down to see what your score was. He had this dopey grin gracing his features from the amount of pride he felt in that moment. He didn’t care what your score was, he knew you had put whatever you could out on the mat. He listened to Travis for a moment until the announcer started up again for scores and awards, “and y/n y/l/n pulled through with the score that she needed, a 14.9 on floor. She placed first in All-Around, Carter following right behind, and Davis in third. If all goes this well at trials, I’d say we have a lot of good representation for the Olympic Games.”

…..

After the meet and countless amount of interviews both you and Nicole were extremely worn out and had both passed out on the flight back. As you and Nicole stepped out of the terminal, you were met with the familiar faces of your friends and family. You smiled as you saw Bee for the first time in a few days and despite how tired you were, you couldn’t stop yourself from running to him. 

He immediately caught you and did the cliche spin (the one you swore you would never do) before pulling you into a regular hug, “I’m so proud of you, babe. You have no idea.”

“Thank you. I surprisingly missed you,” you joked, laughing harder when Joel pulled you away slightly to catch a glimpse of your face. 

“Wow, aren’t I glad I was blessed with such a nice girlfriend? It’s crazy.”

“Absolutely insane.”

“Preposterous.”

“Can the two of you shut the fuck up?” Kevin asked, coming over to give you a hug, “you did good out there, y/n/n. You also kept all your bones intact, I’m proud.”

“Shut the fuck up, Kev.”

“Okay, aside from you getting onto Kev and Bee, I missed you, too,” Karly said from beside Travis. 

“I kinda did, too. You did amazing though, y/n/n. I’m proud,” Travis said. 

“Thank you, thank you. All in a hard day's work,” you said, shrugging. 

“Dude, you might want to go back to Beezer, he looks like a lost puppy watching you talk to us,” Travis pointed out, nodding in Joel’s direction who smiled when you caught his eye. 

“Yeah, not a shocking development,” you said, before walking back in Joel’s direction, “hey, Bee.”

“Hey, honey,” he said, wrapping his arms around you again, “you ready to go home?”

“Yeah, of course,” you leaned up to kiss his cheek. 

“Ew, guys. Get a room,” Kevin called out, fake gagging. 

[prose-for-hire]

UC Sunnyhell: Part five

Hello Jealousy!

Previous part // Next Part

Pairing: Spike x reader

Request: College AU. Part five of eight. Spike is the campus bad boy with a secret soft heart. Spike realises something as he faces more time without you.

Warning: I think only like a little sex reference on this one.

Original request by: @sunflower-stan​

Other tags: @fictionalhoomanofnowhere @harpersmariano @artsymaddie​ @shy-ginger-in-the-graveyard​ @cameo-greaves​

You began to get comfortable around Spike. More so than you ever believed could be possible. He let you in more and it made you want to allow him to know you even more.

You were getting on well. It was strange and you hadn’t really been able to express it to your other group of friends but you really found yourself enjoying his company. He was sweet in a kind of gruff way. He never really showed much emotion on his face other than a scowl before now. But now you were getting to know him more, you could sense subtle changes in his demeanour.

Like how he was much more comfortable when he was at home. When he was in your company now he could almost… relax. You could both be yourselves in a way you never truly felt with anyone else.

Today you were trying something new together. You were sat in his room. A place you had never been invited before. He even opened the windows so you didn’t asphyxiate from the smoke fumes that appeared to cling to every piece of furniture.

You looked around it, smiling at the way it just screamed ‘Spike’. It was pretty dark, even with the curtains open.

You and Spike had been writing. Together. It was strange and very new but you found yourself enjoying it so much. To have a friend that understood. A friend that wanted to explore life through writing. Through words that can describe complex emotions that you would otherwise never be able to capture properly. To discuss it with him, even if you were doing most of the talking, it was so pleasant.

You would pause every so often and share little lines or swap and read through the other’s work and both be desperately nervous for the other’s approval. Neither of you need worry though, you were so entranced by the others mind. You hoped this would become a regular thing, it was special.

However there were other things clouding your mind. It was getting closer and closer to the presentation and you and Angel were out together more frequently. You were making sure to drop some good words in for Buffy here and there. You found yourself getting on quite well with him, you often found him reading while he was waiting for you. Sometimes you spoke about the book if the both of you had read it. He was a lot more sensitive than you had guessed upon first meeting.

It was actually really nice getting to know this popular frat guy, much more so than you had expected to be. You knew what Buffy saw in him. He wasn’t necessarily your type though. Although what your type was, you were still yet to realise. It still hadn’t quite clicked yet to you.

The presentation was on your mind a lot, you were still working on your confidence despite you now being a frequent performer at the open-mic nights. Luckily, you had your friends to distract you. You were sat with your group at lunch. You had all been laughing really loud. You had been laughing so hard your tummy began to ache. None of you could stop it, your humours matched. It was infectious. As soon as it began to die down, suddenly one of you caught it again and sent a wave around the rest of them.

Eventually the laughter died down as different people had different places they needed to go. The others had to go but you and Cordelia didn’t have any more classes for the rest of the day. She was going to cheer practice in an hour and you would go to the library or something when she did so you didn’t look like a complete loner (although nobody would have really been bothered if you had just been sitting alone).

Talk, as it so often did when it was you and Cordy, turned to mindless gossip. You enjoyed it usually she knew pretty much everything about everyone. But today, her sole focus was on Xander. She was complaining about how she couldn’t help that she got a lot of attention from people because she was so pretty. She like being pretty, she did it on purpose but Xander didn’t enjoy the way people would stare.

“So, why shouldn’t people appreciate me if they like the way I look?” She complained with a pout.

“I get that” You offered, nodding along. You were a good listener and Cordy liked this about you.

“Well, Xander doesn’t! Someone even looks at me and it’s like, hello jealousy, y’know?” You nodded along as you usually did, not realising how pertinent this phrase was about to be to your own life. You usually switched off from the conversation when Cordy spoke about Xander. They were so hot and cold no matter what advice you gave her she tended to do the opposite anyway. They weren’t particularly bad for each other they just got hung up on stupid stuff.

Thankfully, Cordy gave you a reprieve. She stopped the conversation, looking up with the meanest expression she could muster. You frowned, looking behind you. Revealing none other than Spike standing behind you.

He had come over to say hello to you. Bracing the cruel eyes of the canteen to get to you. You couldn’t help smiling, it brightened up his day to see you react that way at seeing him.

“Go away, you’re looking at me!” She scowled at him, trying to shoo him from your table as if he were a stray dog asking for scraps.

“Don’t worry, young dumb and full of-” Spike had started and you mimed at him pleadingly not to finish that sentence. To both yours and his surprise, he did. He cut himself off and changed tac, “-stupid thoughts… isn’t my type”

“Oh, God, why is he even speaking to me?! Shut up Spike your type is, like, anything that moves”

“Listen here you stupid bint-”

“No, you listen here you punk reject! Nobody wants you around here, look at yourself! You’re so gross”

You cringed at what they both said. Not knowing what to say yourself. You stayed silent and this was suddenly noticed by them. They looked at you for support and you groaned. This wasn’t working out. One wrong move and the other would try to cut you out of their lives. They both had reputations for being mean but they were both nicer to you than most. You wanted it to stay that way. You valued both of their friendships.

“I, uh, have somewhere to be. Please don’t rip each other to shreds” You offered, suggesting that you weren’t picking a side as you slid everything from the table and into your bag and hurried off.

After this, Spike had decided the fact that you didn’t side with Cordelia was a good sign. He so wanted to see the obvious good in you. Have you as a friend he could rely on. Share his time and his thoughts with you. His mind. Having you in his room, to himself, speaking those words he had started to want to hear more and more of.

You had been lying on your bed when he knocked on the door. It had been less forceful than his usual knock and it made you frown. Almost as if he was nervous to enter. You sat up, calling for him to come in if he wanted. He entered, with something in his hands. He stumbled over his words as soon as he stepped into your room.

“I, uh, found these… they’re really stupid. But I, uh, though you might like ‘em” He said, thrusting the plastic bag into your hands and looking away immediately. You peered into the bag, gasping in excitement.

Old movie scores. Musical numbers. Soundtracks.

Your eyes watered at the thought. To have a friend that thought about you. Wanted to make you smile.

“They were cheap” He shrugged, as if you had stopped this way because of the quality and not as how special this gesture was. How much it meant to you.

You threw yourself at him, getting overexcited in the moment and tried to hug him. He stiffened, his body completely rigid as you did. He didn’t know what to do with him self. In one sense, he was beside himself. Couldn’t shake the elation that you had wanted to hug him. On the other, he was embarrassed. Wasn’t sure what to do with his hands.

He wanted to reciprocate the feeling, the warmth of the embrace, but he was still afraid that any show of vulnerability could open him to ridicule. Could make you jeer at him. His hands moved to hover over your body for a moment before they briefly contacted your skin.

You pulled away, his hands now lingering slightly now as you did. He almost felt as if he wanted to pull you back in for another hug. But… that would be absurd. Right?

“You wanna listen to them with me?!” You asked, an excited smile on your face. He couldn’t resist. He rolled his eyes but then nodded softly as you selected one to play.

Spike was sat in the shared living space. One that you both now truly shared. Spending your evenings laughing and making fun of something dumb on tv or just talking. He loved it when you leaned in to turn the set down so you and him could just talk. You had done this well into the night on several occasions.

He shouted for you from where he was sat on the sofa. He asked if you want to watch something on the box – that you can study or whatever later. He turned and saw that you were dressed up a little more than you usually would for lounging around the house. He subtly scanned his eyes along your form as he spoke.

“We goin’ to a party, love? Type with, say, free booze?” He tried his luck but you shook your head. He couldn’t help feel such acute disappointment that you had rejected it so quickly.

“No, just meeting a friend” you explain softly. You didn’t mention who it was, that you were going to have a drink with Angel and talk about your presentation. You knew how much Spike hated Angel. And you didn’t owe him an explanation about where you were going anyway. He never told you. So... why did you feel a little guilty to leave him this way?

You shrugged. Instead, you waved your goodbye with a little smile that he was beginning to find endearing.

He frowned at the idea of you leaving, something was bugging him and he couldn’t figure out what. He didn’t want you to go out and leave him lonely. He valued your friendship so much. He wanted you to come back and spend the evening with him. The way he usually pretty much always chose to stay in with you.

The feeling had been there for a while now, building up in his mind. He hadn’t even identified it until it had started to push itself to the forefront of his mind. He frowned but shrugged. Turning back to the tv for company.

It had been a few weeks since you went out for that evening and Spike had noticed you had been really busy lately. Instead of your time being his, spent in the house like you usually would, you had been out almost every day.

And, when you weren’t out, you were smiling at your phone. He caught you laughing out loud once. It made him tense his jaw. Mutter under his breath. You barely looked up to the tv anymore when you were sat together, let alone at him. Not that… he needed you to look at him, obviously. You hadn’t written together for over a week though either. You were busy messaging people he would insist he was too cool for.

It bugged him to no end though. That even in his company you would rather be talking to other people. He almost felt as if he wasn’t enough. As if you wanted to be away from him despite your insistence that he was someone you now considered a good friend.

On one rare occasion you deigned to stay in with him (an evening you had enjoyed more than any in that week because you could finally relax). It had gotten too much for him though. His annoyance that you had been using your phone so much rather than giving him attention he had started to crave. He ended up checking through your phone.

You had just left it lying there while you went into your bedroom to get something – what was he supposed to do?

He swiped it from the arm of the chair where it had been left. He opened it up and scrolled through your messages. Finding something that made his stomach drop. It left a sour taste in his mouth.

Angel. You were sat beside him but texting Angel. Sending him smiley faces and sweet replies. He tensed his jaw, a stone in the pit of his stomach. This feeling he couldn’t name weighing him down.

He had become suspicious. Of your intentions. There was a weird distance when you thought you had become friends. It made you a little upset. You didn’t know whether to broach it with him, you wanted to just enjoy your time with him.

Another evening and you were going out again. The library and then some dumb party after. Spike hadn’t caught where or he would have crashed. He knew how nervous you could get. Wanted to make sure you came back safe. 

Came back to… him. 

He frowned. That was a weird thought. Still, he shrugged it off and looked back towards you. He didn’t realise how much he had needed a friend. No, not just any friend. You. He couldn’t get over just how much he enjoyed having you around.

“Don’t go” He had whispered as you left, it was inaudible to you. He frowned at himself again. At the way he heard the pleading note in his voice. About how much that sentence really meant.

He refused to think about it. To delve deeper inside. To get why he had thought this. He just couldn’t. Not yet.

Instead, he lit up a cigarette and walked to the liquor store. He planned on taking the bottle to bed with him tonight rather than some cheap imitation of…

You frowned as you walked. Wishing you could spend time in and feel that bond you had started to become so sure of with Spike.

He drank to forget. His loneliness. The fact that he didn’t have you this evening. He found himself looking forward to every moment you would spend together. Just talking. Laughing.

Another afternoon rolled by where he had been staying in in the hopes of you being around the house too. The roles appeared to have switched since you began to get to know each other. Ever since he had found a real connection, a proper friendship, he had wanted to cling to it. 

But you were now more popular than ever, having to split yourself between so many people. Because they all saw in you what he did, how kind you were. How nice it is to be in your company.

“Alright, pet?” 

“Yeah, you know. Busy” You sighed. If you were honest, you would be pleased when the presentation was over. All this work you were doing, evenings and afternoons you were spending away from home. Not to say that you weren’t friends with Angel but being out so often when you were used to staying in was starting to exhaust you.

When he saw that you were going out again his face dropped. You were packing up your bag with all of the stationery you appeared to have a never-ending stock of. He was planning to ask if you were running a black-market, coloured-highlighter export on the side.

“Date?” He asked, the tone was light but his face was tense.

“Yeah like I would have time for that!” You smiled at him and he scoffed.

“Yeah, m’sure Angel would love seein’ your vast stationery collection”

“What? Is that a euphemism that my mind isn’t dirty enough to understand?” You aimed for a teasing joke but as soon as you said euphemism and assigned it to talking about Angel, he got even more tense. Launching into his petty review of Angel’s character.

“Yeah, well maybe he is popular and has somethin’ going for him but-but he has a massive forehead a-and stupid hair”

“Okay, childish. Do you want some crayons to keep yourself occupied while I’m out?”

“Don’t get smart, don’t suit you” He quipped which made you smile a little but his face was sullen. He wasn’t in a good mood with you again. And you didn’t properly understand why.

“Why don’t we write tomorrow?!” You said excitedly, “I have the entire afternoon free… maybe we can do what we did last time?” You smiled in his direction, your enthusiasm making the corners of his mouth tug into an almost-smile. But when he saw you begin to leave as you spoke, he said something else.

“Yeah if you got time in your oh so busy life”

“Offer’s there! I’ll see you later”

“Yeah, whatever” He said, slouching in his chair which made you sigh a little. You would be in a gloomy mood for the rest of the evening now that he was in a bad mood with you. You cared so much about what he thought and felt now, it was so strange.

He carried on this way for a while even though you mentioned several times you and Angel had been paired up together and were only ever working on the project. Hinting that you really wouldn’t be spending so much time out otherwise. 

Angel was friendly and nice to you but the long silences were hard to navigate at times. There just wasn’t that effortlessness you had when you were with Spike. He had annoyed you a little because what with all of his commitments you had ended up doing more than your share of the workload because of his busy schedule.

Spike had began to withdraw himself from you a little. It made you sad, this man who you had been forming such a strong bond with. Exploring this supportive friendship you suddenly had. Was suddenly turning his back on you.

He wasn’t really sure why he was in such a bad mood with you. He knew you had a presentation. He had given you a bit of help when he saw how much of a workload you had on. He had also seen Angel’s name on the form next to yours so he knew the reason you were spending so much time with Angel.

However, what neither of you really understood at the time was that Spike’s insecurity was winning over. He was comparing himself to Angel because he had so much of your time. Made him feel less-than. It made him believe that you probably felt that way too.

He couldn’t help his insecurity. The way it festered in his chest. Why would you want to spend time with him when there was someone like that you got on with so well?

His snide comments and tense nature was worrying you still. He thought he had been slick but you had seen him put the phone back onto your chair as you returned to the room that evening. You weren’t so bothered, you weren’t hiding anything it just meant you put a lock on your phone when you realised.

He had asked about your day and you told him. You had mentioned Angel all of once and yet it was the only part of your day he was thinking about.

“Oh yeah, and did you and Angel have a bloody brilliant time? Did you have a right giggle and skip through the merry streets-”

“What is going on with you? Why are you being like this?” You finally confronted him, you just wanted your friend back.

“Not being anything. Just tellin’ you what’s what” He shrugged, avoiding your eye contact.

“You’ve been in a horrible mood ever since I started my project – I can’t help that I’ve got so much going on! I swear with Willow’s blood-drive and Xander’s basketball games as well as Buffy’s parties and all of my work I have no time to even think for myself!”

“Well, at least your priorities are set, right pet?” He said, this time the bite in his voice was evident. He hadn’t even made the list. He wasn’t even on your mind as someone you wanted to spend time with was all he had gotten from your sentence.

“What that I can’t be friends with you if I’m friendly with them? With Angel?” You said this pointedly, you could tell that was why he had been so weird now, “It doesn’t change the way I feel about you. Uh… about our friendship” You realised the way you had phrased it may have sounded a bit ambiguous and so you added the latter part. He just stared at you. Stopping dead.

But he hadn’t stopped because of the awkward way you covered your sentence. He stopped because those words made him want you to mean that. That you would want to be in a relationship with him.

It was like a switch turning on. Those words. He was finally understanding it.

“Yeah, well, whatever” he just shrugged, adjusting the leather duster back on his shoulders before storming away.

But the conversation you had was still swirling around his mind. He finally realises why he’s being like this.

It all made sense to him so suddenly. Hit him in the gut.

The way he had enjoyed the interactions with you, even if you had been arguing. How he had acted with you in mind, to get a reaction. Even if it was anger. The way he couldn’t take his eyes off you in the room. Positioned himself closer to you. Wanted to spend all of his time with you. Had begun waking up earlier to spend more time with you. The way your words, your writing appeared to fill up his soul. The dreams he had about you…

“Oh balls!” He muttered throwing himself down onto his bed, “I bloody love them!”

He was aching under this realisation. His heart near-beating for you. His mind always on you and what you were doing. The idea of you being with a man that wasn’t him made his skin crawl. Made his mind fog with red mist.

He wanted to hold you. To catch your lips with his. Show you exactly what you meant to him. Wanted to have you with him more, sharing your hearts and minds. God, he made himself dizzy just lying there in bed thinking about having you that way. In every way.

The day of your project suddenly came and he did say good luck for it beforehand despite all of his weird behaviour. He knew that it meant a lot to you. It went well and you and Angel were so relieved. Neither of you were the best at that sort of thing, but you were definitely getting better. Your project was finally over and you and angel remained fast friends. Also, he had a thing for Buffy too you had never been more sure of it.

Spike seemed to relax when your project was done and your friendship had continued. He hadn’t brought a one-night-stand home in almost a week and even before that there had only been one or two people you had seen recently.

You even asked if he needed medical attention for his wrist because you were sure it was being over-used. You were becoming much more comfortable talking to him about sex. You were becoming so comfortable with him in general.

He threw a cushion at you and muttered something under his breath but you could tell his heart wasn’t in it. He didn’t even try to make an excuse up he just turned back to the soap opera.

You glanced sideways at him, trying to figure him out. You caught glimpses but you wanted more. You wanted to ask and have him tell you about him. His past. His thoughts. But you knew better than to push him. It might make him completely close back up again.

He just gestured with his head towards the tv. To tell you to watch the soap again. You had been caught looking. You snapped your gaze away too quickly. Staring at the tv, feeling a heat rising in your cheeks. You felt something when you looked at him. You couldn’t even begin to understand.

He acted as if he was watching the tv but he wasn’t. He was sneaking glances at you when he thought you couldn’t see. Inching slightly closer in his chair so that he was nearer to you. Wishing he could reach between the space. Embrace you like you had that one time.

He was used to quick sex, one-night stands and getting them to leave straight after. But when it came to you… this was so new. This feeling – he was sure of it. He was intoxicated by you. You were in every thought. Every waking moment. And in his sleep too.

The dreams he would have. He wanted you. He really wanted you. Only you.

[seriouslyblacklikemysoul]

Like her - Bucky Barnes

Hello!! I did a thing... I big oops... I have no idea where this is going but honestly... gosh, Bucky is finally given the spotlight! Yes, I am talking about that trailer.  So, I guess bear with me? From what I feel, this is going to be ... quite the journey. Spoilers, if I accidentally am on to something? MASTERLIST Word Count~ 2k.  If you want to be tagged or you have an idea about this, please let me know!  Love you all! 

      Nothing made sense anymore. The world seemed to be upside down and he couldn’t find an anchor to hold on to. A thousand thoughts on his mind, past and future blurred into a chaotic present. He had found a still moment in the universe, after his best friend retired and that was the only way he could cope with the ever-changing situation.   

         He had believed that a new beginning was all that he needed; but before he could begin, he had to be free of his past and that he simply could not do. Working with Wilson was not his cup of tea, either. He was searching for meaning but maybe fulfillment wasn’t about what he had already done, maybe it was about the things he hadn’t and that was worse.                            It was simple mission; keep an eye on a questionable individual. Well, at least, that was what the files told him. Girl, early twenties, not a very interesting life – to him, at least, he thought. She might have loved studying and serving coffee to people she didn’t know just so she could earn her living. And a clue that linked her to an old enemy – Zemo. No one knew what their relationship was, or even if there was any. They had been able to pick up a single message sent from her phone to an unknown number that it was later identified as Zemo’s.                He was standing outside the coffee shop she was working, not knowing if he would be able to identify her; they only had a blurry picture of her – another clue that she was onto something as she was avoiding to be seen. Not that he could blame her for that. If she was working with the man that put him trough all of that a couple of years ago, he didn’t know if he would hand her over or…                    He walked inside, trying to appear as relaxed and nonchalant as possible, knowing that he would be awkward anyway. Sam could have done this, he thought, rolling his eyes at that. It was quite busy, actually, and the atmosphere was cozier than what he had expected. And so, he found the table that furthest away but had a good angle-view to keep an eye on the personnel and sat down. He scanned the place but there was no trace of the girl from the picture. He was pretending to read the menu so no one would come soon to take his order.                He was about to stand up and leave, having spent almost half an hour being a jerk and not ordering a thing, when a soft tornado rushed through the front door. He was left gawking at her for a moment and then quickly shook it off. She murmured an apology to her colleagues but they just smiled at her, as if they knew why she was late. He was able to distinct two words: application, problems. He cleared his throat and not a moment later, there she was.            “Hello! What can I get you?” she politely asked him, ready to take his order, not exactly looking at him. Whatever she was previously doing, affected her still. He was caught by surprise, because he actually never looked at the menu.                    “An americano and um, what do you suggest?” he had to act normal, he thought again. Maybe channel his inner long-lost self. She finally looked at him, with a questioning smile on her face. The picture they had was old and did not do her any justice.                “Our sour lemon bars are amazing” she informed him after a second of brainstorming. Sour, huh? He noticed her body language – she truly didn’t know who he was. Then again, without his long hair and a visible metal arm, not many people could recognize him. He nodded in agreement and she left.                    She was in a pretty bad mood. The application she had sent to the university was still not accepted, her computer broke down, she was barely making it by and she was tired having had zero sleep the night before, tormented by nightmares. She handed the order to Jackie and sat down, behind the bar. While Jackie was preparing everything, she was making herself a cup of coffee.                    “He is cute” she heard – and so did he, thanks to his enhanced senses. He was not used to being called cute or anything like that. Maybe an older version of him was pretty good with women – this one, not so much. He wasn’t bad, unlike Steve, but … something wasn’t there anymore.           She looked at him, for a split second before gulping her coffee down.                  “Better you than me” she whispered. The other girl was shocked.            “What happened?” she asked her, a ton of concern laced her voice and that captured his attention.              “I don’t know what to do” she said, almost desperate. As his lemon bars were being transferred to a beautiful plate, Jackie asked the one-million-dollar question.          “What about that guy? Helmut?”. That was all Bucky needed to add her to his suspect list – well, to cross off everyone else but her, really.            “Hasn’t delivered and I am running out of time” she murmured in fear of being heard. She was right to be afraid of that, he did eavesdrop. Bucky hoped that she would be the one to bring his coffee but unfortunately, another waiter came.                    For the better part of an hour, he tried to catch anything of importance, having already informed Sam. But there was nothing. She just did her job. Deciding that it was better to leave in order not to attract any kind of unwanted attention, he left the money on the table and walked out of the place, faster than he would have liked.            Who was she?        

           It had been pretty hard for her, lately. That roughly translated into more than ten years. She was used to being treated badly by life but she was standing right on the edge and she had nothing to grab onto to stop her fall. As long as she could remember, she was alone. The first person she had met was a grim old lady, telling her to stop crying otherwise the Sinnerman was going to eat her. Once she was at an age, she could understand what was happening, she was made aware she had no family – that wanted her, anyway – and that was why she had ended up there. It more of a torture-place than an orphanage.                    By the age of fifteen, she had achieved an early high school graduation, and her caretakers saw that she didn’t have the potentials to become the next prodigy, no matter the hard work. Being fifteen and on the streets was something she wished on nobody. She was smart, though – she got a job and soon was able to afford her own place. It was small but it was all she needed. A roof over her head, a bed and a shower.              Lately, things were just not easy. She hadn’t been paid for at least four months and she had no cushion of money to fall onto. Her landlord would kick her out any minute now, and she had no backup plan. Her study application hadn’t panned out yet and when a stranger reached her, promising her a ton of cash and a name, she didn’t think twice.            When she agreed to hack into a couple of databases, she had no idea who that person was. Only that he knew her parents and was willing to pay. That was all she needed, really. Little did she know, she was helping a criminal to get out of a life-long sentence. She tried to back away, but a single threat was more than enough to persuade her. She wasn’t used to knives being that close to her neck.            She had done her part, even though she regretted it, but he had still to deliver and she had no other option. She would stay awake, thinking why her? Out of all the hackers in the world, why her?            “Don’t worry! They’ll choose you, they would be stupid not to” Jackie told her, as she was ready to leave. She laughed at that.              “I am not gonna pay them, I am the one asking them for a fund. They would be stupid if they did choose me!” she explained again, waving her goodbye. She was closing up the place today. She didn’t mind. The later she got back to her place, the smaller the chances to meet her landlord. She liked working alone, being alone. That was why she had it easier than the other girls back in the day.  They struggled keeping up with the classes, the training, the killing. She did her job, and got on with her life. Well, at least until she was kicked out.                Placing the last cups back on their self, she heard the door opening and closing – footsteps were approaching her.                “I’m sorry, we’re closed” she chimed, as she turned around. That guy again. Yeah, alright, he was cute but her mind was warning her. He smiled – but it was forced and she saw it. Something wasn’t right.                  “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t see any sign” he said and it was true, she hadn’t put on the closed sign. He knew that she knew – but instead of making a run for it, she played along. Sam was waiting outside, car ready.            “Oh, yeah, that’s my bad” she calmly informed him, letting her towel down and picking up the sing to hang, moving slowly through the space. He recognized her moves but it couldn’t be. Her moves were familiar but not fully known. He was closing in. After a rather long eye-contact, she threw the metal sign at him, aiming his exposed neck, almost cutting him. She was strong.              All it took was two steps and they were engaged in a full-blown combat. He threw up his forearms like an offensive lineman blocking a defensive back, but she slipped to the side, pushed his elbow down and away, caught his head, and rolled him into the floor. Not even a second later, Bucky threw her off of him and was on his feet, watching her rush toward him in slow motion. He reached under his shirt even as he pushed past the tables. She did not try to stop the gun; she rolled his hand under his wrist, drove his arm over and back, and pulled him backward and down. She had the gun before he slammed into the floor, and was pointing it at him.              She wasn’t afraid to use it, and he was almost scared by the look on her face. He had seen that look before. He tackled her, grabbed her wrist with his right hand and held the gun hand against her chest, while he placed his left arm tightly around her neck. She headbutted him but neither flinched.              Before she could do anything, Sam placed a cloth on her mouth and nose and knocked her out.              “Took you long enough” he mused at an annoyed Bucky. He rolled his eyes at him, still very much confused as to why she knew those moves.                “I think she was trained for the Black Widow program” he let on, as he picked her up while Sam made everything to look as if nothing had happened. He even closed up the place.                    Bucky placed her on the backseat of the car. She wasn’t a Black Widow, yet her fighting style…                    “Who is she?” Sam asked as they were driving away. 

[meggannn]

Can I ask, what's the beef with Greg Ellis and Mark Darrah? I haven't been keeping up with BioWare in general and the Dragon Age fandom & company division in particular (I'm more of a Mass Effect person) so all I noticed is that two big names (were?) quit a few days ago so I am genuinely puzzled at that exchange. Did Ellis get screwed over by BioWare/Darrah somehow or is he doing some unfounded shit-stirring?

Oh for sure, so I don’t know all the details, but I’ll try

Greg Ellis

Greg Ellis is the voice actor for Cullen, a character who is in every Dragon Age game. the actor has been a pretty shitty person for a while—I’m sure there’s a callout post for him somewhere on tumblr—but he’s the British equivalent of a Trumper, transphobic, hosts a podcast/contributes to/does audio readings for a right-leaning website that complains about liberals and universities, often gets into fights with LGBT+ folk on twitter and block them (so many that a lot of DA fans couldn’t read his tweets today lol).

[ID: Greg Ellis tweet: “I praise @Ayaan for supporting @jk_rowling in standing her ground. They are heroes of our times. /end ID]

[ID: Greg Ellis tweet: “Today on The Respondent @GreggHurwitz discusses the challenges of identitarianism on college campuses. /end ID]

From Wikipedia: Identitarianism: “The Identitarian movement or Identitarianism is a post-World War II European far-right political ideology which asserts the right of Europeans and peoples of European descent to preserve the culture and territories.”

[ID: Greg Ellis tweet from June 2018: Indicative of our current culture that I tweet about inspirational free thinkers & up pops a trolling SJW who can’t separate me from my work. Conflating my inclusive & equitable opining with a video game character I voice is SJW indent politicking full blown.”

Greg Ellis tweet replying to a disappointed fan who was upset about his support for Trump: “Speaking ‘on behalf of thousands of fans’ of a video game & suggesting I ‘broke their hearts’ because I support ALL who hold Presidential office is ludicrous. VG fandom is not exclusive to LGBTQ or those not hate filled about @potus. I believe in equity & inclusivity.” /end ID]

to demonstrate how much of an attention-seeking child he is, Ellis also likes to tease his fans with hashtags and get them up in a tizzy to gain followers, tagging things #Cullennites and #DA4 just to wind up bait-switching and actually talk about something completely different, or maybe even nothing.

[ID: Tweet from Greg Ellis, I don’t have the date but I believe this was from spring of 2018: “I’ve been officially authorized to disclose details about the game only when I reach 10k followers. I feel like a puppet. Will you help pull the strings? I’m positively itching to share. #videogame #announcement #cullenites” /end ID]

Beef with Mark Darrah

I think what specifically started his beef with Mark Darrah was this summer, Ellis tweeted in support of Ayaan/JKR (above), resulting in a lot of upset fans replying to him. He got in lots of fights with them, blocking several, prompting fans to make more tweets expressing anger/disappointment about DA4/the future of Cullen, and even tweet at other Dragon Age developers asking if Cullen could be recast if he comes back at all.

Mark Darrah made a tweet saying basically nothing substantial about it, but he said: “It’s important to us that the people we work with are aligned with our BioWare values. This will be apparent when we’re ready to announce what actors will be lending their voices to the game.” He even replied directly to a few fans throughout the tags/search results who were concerned, including @theherocomplex​ which I saw, so it’s a safe assumption he was at least taking the anger seriously.

Ellis replied to the public tweet: “What r the @bioware values @BioMarkDarrah? Don’t the loyal #Cullenites & @dragonage fans have a right to know? Don’t u have a responsibility to tell them? DO u support cancel culture? Do u support defamatory comments like this? Careful how u answer ~ u might lose ur job”

I mean, it’s pretty ballsy to threaten a lead creative at a company responsible for a chunk of your fame when your character’s arc is effectively over and they don’t need to have you in any games anymore... there are tons of crappy British actors out there to replace you, and it’s not like they don’t already have Gideon Emery in a dozen different wigs, lmao

What Happened This Week (Dec 3 and Dec 4, 2020)

Mark Darrah was, until recently, a staple in the Dragon Age team. A lot of people were worried when his resignation yesterday came out of the blue, and Casey Hudson (also a lead creative/big name) also resigned from the Mass Effect team at the same time, which to me is pretty concerning.

Yesterday after the news broke, a fan asked Darrah if his beef with Ellis might have had anything to do with his departure (basically asking if it was a forced resignation): “If this has anything to do with a recent blowout with a VA from Inquisition who publically called for @BioMarkDarrah to be fired, I'm going to be so sickened and disappointed by this company for siding with bigotry.” Darrah replied with just “lol” which to me was a little concerning, because if you read it sarcastically, it seemed to imply the drama with Ellis did have something to do with it. without proof, it’s difficult to say, and of course Darrah and Hudson gave polite goodbyes but are silent on the real reasons that prompted them to go.

Today, Ellis has managed to convince himself that he did get Darrah fired, likely over the stink he raised about Darrah publicly for siding with LGBT+ fans over him. but in his replies to that, Darrah mentioned pretty open skepticism in his tweets that Ellis would ever be rehired by BW again, so.... maybe the Ellis drama is not it. IDK.

TLDR: basically, Ellis is a bigoted right-wing voice actor who picks fights with fans who call him out, and he is still coasting off the attention highs he got from voicing a highly controversial video game character in a franchise that hasn’t hired him since 2014. in summer 2020, Ellis threatened Darrah’s job (not at as if he has any power to threaten him with), basically because Darrah stood up to him, and now that he no longer has to play civil as a BioWare employee, Darrah finally snapped and called him out on twitter for being unprofessional and implied Ellis wouldn’t be asked back to BioWare anyway even if Ellis WAS the reason he left. other Dragon Age developers (who still work at BW) are liking and replying to Darrah’s tweets with supportive gifs/emojis, so I think it’s a fair to say Darrah’s attitude is prevalent in the company but current workers just can’t say anything, and they do not want Ellis back again.

[beholdme]

All the Many Shades of Gerry - Chapter 9

Chapters: 9/19

Fandom: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Gerard Keay/Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist, Martin Blackwood/Gerard Keay, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist, Gerard Keay/Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist

Characters: Martin Blackwood, Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist, Gerard Keay, Tim Stoker (The Magnus Archives), Sasha James, Gertrude Robinson, Elias Bouchard

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Library AU, Librarian Jon, Artist Gerry, Trans Male Character, Trans Martin Blackwood, Canon Asexual Character, Asexual Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist, Ace Subtype - Sex Positive, Polyamory, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Romantic Fluff, Falling In Love, Boys in Skirts, Kissing, Demisexual Gerard Keay, Minor Character Death, Past Character Death, Canon-Typical Child Neglect, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Flirting, Minor Jonathan “Jon” Sims | The Archivist/Tim Stoker, Adventures in Hair Dying, Happy Ending, Banter, Gerry has a lot of sass, Gerard Keay is Morticia Adams, Jon is a very grumpy Librarian, Martin adores them anyway.

Summary: In which Gerry is a kaleidoscope and Jon and Martin can’t help falling in love with him.

He happens to love them back.

Find it on Ao3

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8]

On a Tuesday in the middle of November, not long after Gerry's 28th birthday, the three of them eat dinner at Gerry's flat, as they often do these days. Jon cooks for them and after, Martin and Gerry wash the dishes and debate the book they both just finished reading.

Jon has been twitchy all evening, so they leave him to read his own book in peace.

He wanders in at one point, leaning against the counter. "Gerry, do you know what day it is?"

Gerry looks over at him in such a way as to indicate that he really doesn't.

"Our six-month anniversary?" He tries.

"No," Martin pipes up, "That's not for weeks yet."

Jon and Gerry both look at him askance. "What? Your boyfriend starts dating another man, you remember the date. I can't believe you two don't know." Martin says as if that about covers it.

"Nevermind that." Jon snaps, and even with his previous moodiness, the others are taken aback at his blunt words and even harsher tone.

"Something wrong, Jon?" Gerry asks quietly, leaning against the opposite counter to Jon and crossing his arms. His tone suggests what he actually wanted to say was 'Do we have a problem here, bitch?' but he manages to reign the actual words in.

"I want to know why you left without saying goodbye." Jon's words are filled with a multitude of frustrations, none of which are actually conveyed in his limited words.

"Yesterday?" Gerry asks, incredulous. "You were asleep!"

"No! Not yesterday." Jon snaps back. "When we were younger. It's been ten years today since you disappeared off the face of the planet."

"Oh," Gerry responds quietly, his defensive posture dropping. He leans his hands back on the table behind him, bringing his shoulders up around his ears. It’s a rare display of confident, edgy Gerry trying to shrink himself.

"I thought we were, you know. Together. Then one day you were just gone! As if you had never existed. Your mother wouldn't tell me anything at all, just sat there smirking at me, said that you were gone and she didn't know when you were coming back, or if you were ever coming back. Which you never did, actually." Jon has been pacing, his voice rising with each new word until the final words are shouted accusatorily into the space between them.

Gerry knew Jon had wanted to talk about this since the day he walked in the library and back into his life. He had waited, been patient, and Gerry had put it off in the hopes that he would never have to choke the words out. Now, that patience was obviously over, and he knew he owed Jon this explanation.

"We were together Jon. I loved you."

"So why? What did I do so wrong, that I got to wake up one day and find you gone ?" Jon's voice has become desperate, and they can all hear the tears that he is trying to hold back.

"Don't say that. You didn't do anything wrong. We weren't perfect, but we were always so good together. I... I had to get out of there. And I couldn't leave any clues behind, so I couldn't tell you anything, because it wouldn't have been safe for either of us." Gerry reaches towards Jon to soothe him, but he flinches away and Gerry doesn't pursue him.

"I don't understand." The tears have come, and Gerry desperately tries to hold back his own when he sees them.

Martin had up until that point been standing resolutely in the corner, trying not to interfere in their pre-Martin argument. At the advent of tears, Martin moves to stand at Jon's back, gripping his shoulder for comfort. Gerry looks bereft and Martin holds out a hand to get him to come closer as well. They huddle all together, both Jon and Gerry taking comfort in Martin's steadiness.

Gerry leans into Jon, sliding his hand around his neck and pressing their foreheads together. "I'm so sorry, love. I've never forgiven myself for just disappearing on you. I thought about you every day."

"I love you," Jon whispers as Martin rocks them both gently. "But I need to know."

"I love you too." Gerry shuts his eyes and wishes more than ever to erase his shitty legacy of pain and blood.

*

Martin drags them to bed and offers to leave them alone to their talk.

"Please stay," Gerry says, grasping his hand. "You both need to know, and I don't want to have to talk through this twice."

So they all pile into Gerry's bed together, sitting in a vague circle like teenagers at a slumber party.

As Gerry starts to talk, Martin drags him over toward him and begins braiding his dark blue hair. It's both an offer of physical comfort and affection (easily Gerry's main love language) and a simple way of letting him off the hook for eye contact.

With Jon staring at him quite intently, Martin doesn't think he needs any further pressure.

"Jon, you-" He starts and then halts abruptly. Jon reaches over and grasps his hand, attempting to further ground him. "You remember my mother. I know you saw how, how just off she was. Manipulative and controlling. By turns demanding and completely uninterested in me. One day I would be free to run wild for weeks at a time, the next she would have a meltdown if I wasn't exactly where she wanted me, every second of the day and night." Gerry blows a breath out, shuddering at the memory of a particularly bad incident with a vase that had left him needing several stitches over his left eye.

"Well, she wasn't always like that. I remember her being a pretty good mom when I was young, if distant. She was always far more interested in being a wife than a mother, and she loved the way my father adored her.

“When I was 7, my father was blinded in an accident at work. I remember the day the phone call came. She spoke very calmly to the hospital, before hanging up the phone and shattering every picture frame in the house." Martin is finished with Gerry's hair and simply leans into him, offering silent comfort. "He coped okay with his new disability actually, and I liked helping him learn the world again with no sight. My mother never recovered from her initial breakdown though. She was angry and petulant that she needed to help and support him for the first time in their entire relationship and became more and more unhinged over the course of a year.

"One day I came home from school to find a puddle of blood soaked into the floor of the living room. She said there had been an accident and my father wasn't coming back. She hit me for the first time when I cried. She told me that I was a man now, and tears were for useless girls and disgusting… Well, you get the picture."

Gerry pauses and glances between them. A few tears have started to run down his face, but he doesn't seem to even notice them.

"We moved a few days later, and that was all I ever knew about my father's death until I was eighteen, almost ten years later. I'll spare you the horrid details, but as I'm sure you've already guessed, she murdered him. She explained very, very graphically what she had done with the body, and that she would never be caught, no one would ever think to blame her, even if anyone could ever prove that he was dead at all."

The words hang heavy in the air between the three of them. Gerry feels the comfort of their touches, but can hardly stand the affection anymore. He gets up off the bed and goes to look out the bedroom window, arms crossed and posture hard.

"Then she looked me right in the eye. And she told me that was exactly what would happen to Jon if she ever caught me with him again."

Dead, cold silence fills the room.

Gerry turns back around to find them both watching him. "So, I packed whatever I could fit into my duffle bag, and I got the hell out of dodge. I ran. I ran because I couldn't close my eyes at night with seeing your face white and cold and covered in blood and," he breaks off and takes a shuddering breath, covering his eyes and sinking to his knees. "And I couldn't stand that she would hurt you because of me. That all your light and potential would be ripped away from you in blood and pain and nothing I felt for you could make even the risk of that worthwhile."

He lifts his head to look up at them, where they’ve moved to the side of the bed towards him. “And do you want to know what the worst part is, actually? I can’t get over the idea that even though I haven’t seen Mary Keay in 10 years, the ghost of her demons lives inside of me. That I'm really just… Her. That one day my mind will snap and I'll be a danger to you both and I'll be the one hurting you, just like she hurt him. And then I'll just be the same monster who has always haunted my dreams."

Martin and Jon exchange a heavy look. They can scarcely believe that Gerry had endured so much and yet is still… Gerry. Happy, flirtatious, loving Gerry. Gerry, who fills their lives with colour and spontaneity, always showing up when they least expected him, pushing himself into their gravity and asking for space in their lives.

Despite the rather violent nature of Gerry's confession, it doesn't change anything for either of them. Things are not yet settled between them, but they curl around Gerry on the floor and they cry together over shattered innocence and sacrificed futures, and Jon promises himself that he will never let Mary Keay come between him and Gerry ever again.

[erule]

Sounds of Someday

Title: Sounds of Someday

Pairing: Dean x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 6700ish

Warnings: age gap (the reader is 21, while Dean is 26), mention of self-sabotage, mention of a mother abandoning her child, slight smut, angst, romance, friends to lovers, professor!Dean, plot twists, betrayal from a father figure, breakup, language, happy ending.

Summary: Dean and the reader have always been good friends, even since their fathers made them play together when they were kids. After loving Dean for six years, she thought she had forgotten about him, but when they see each other again at her house, she realizes that she’s still in love with him. But maybe even Dean seems to feel something for her this time. The problem? She’s about to graduate from uni and her father wants her to leave for London. What will she do? Will Dean be willing to let her go now that he has found her again?

A/N: Hello hello! This fic participates to Jen’s Make Me Cry Challenge. Thank you Jen for the opportunity and congrats again for your goal! I chose prompt #7, We were never friends, that you can find marked in bold inside the story. I had so much fun writing it! This story means so much to me, I really put my heart into it, so I hope you like it.  

I suggest you to listen to Sounds of Someday by Radio Company (fic’s title comes from there), 21 by Gracie Abrams (the whole idea of the story comes from here) and Empty Spaceby James Arthur while reading, if you want.

If you wanna be tagged in my Dean Winchester fics, just let me know in my ask box! You can also find me on AO3 and Wattpad. Feedback is always appreciated by a writer! Enjoy!

Tags: @akshi8278 @jawritter​  

Story under the cut!

«So, it was all a lie, uh?» she asked, holding back the tears.

Dean clenched his jaw, shaking his head.

«No, of course not. It was all true and we were real, Y/N. It’s just that we can’t do this anymore.»

«You’re breaking up with me after you said you loved me, in a very emotionless way and I should believe that…? Listen Dean, I’m not buying it. Did my Dad forced you to do this?» she asked, coming closer to him. Dean swallowed, without looking at her. She said he wasn’t feeling anything, but she was wrong. He felt something. He felt his whole body burning up just because of her breath near him, but he coudn’t say it. «You can’t even look at me in the eye… You’re gonna regret it, Dean. You’re not coming back from this.»

«Good, because I don’t want to» he replied, with his best poker face. He really seemed cruel. He had to.

She bit her bottom lip.

«I hope you’re satisfied with this ending. I’m certainly not.»

«Endings are never easy. I’m sorry, kiddo.»

«I hate when you call me like that, now» she said, her throat dry as the desert. He used to call her like that when she was younger. It was like he cared about her, but making a distance between them at the same time. Dean looked at his bare feet, feeling so guilty. «You used to call me like that, when we were just friends.»

«But that’s the matter, Y/N: we were never friends» he said, trying to hurt her even more.

«Well, fuck you, Dean!» she yelled, angrily.

«I’m sorry, ba… Y/N.»

«Fuck you, Dean» she repeated, then she surpassed him to get to the door.

***

«Hey Y/N, come downstairs! The Winchesters are here!» said her father.

«I’m coming!»

That was the day of their ruin.

She hadn’t seen Dean in a year and now he looked stunning. He had always been handsome, but now, that guy, who had just turned twenty-six, seemed better than ever. He was breathtaking.

She sighed on the stairs, then she went downstairs to welcome Dean, his brother, Sam and his father, John. Her father, Jay, had always been a good friend of John, so Sam and Dean were always at her house to play when they were kids. Then, Dean was always coming around because he constantly asked her father what he had to do to become a teacher and now he had finally become a professor at her university. She was twenty-one and she was about to graduate. Jay wanted her to go to London to find a job, but she wasn’t sure about that, because her dream was heading to Chicago.

«Y/N, are you okay?» Jay asked her.

«Yes, of course! I was just thinking, sorry. Hi, everybody» she said, politely.

Dean immediately offered her his hand to shake.

«Hey, Y/N. You look really beautiful, tonight» he said. Y/N blushed and her father noticed that.

«Are you hitting on my daughter, Dean?» joked Jay.

«I always am» Dean replied, with a wink.

Everybody laughed at that, but Y/N doubted about his answer for a moment. Dean wasn’t someone who talked like that about any girl, not about her anyway, for sure. But that thought was erased instantly: he wasn’t interested in her. She wasn’t attractive, he said that some years before that day with a very simple sentence: “You’re like a sister to me. The little sister I never wanted”. Yeah, that pretty sure cancelled all of her thoughts.

After the dinner, she went to the garden to breathe some air. She sat down on the little swing they still had from her childhood, a cold beer in her hands and the eyes full of the stars she was looking at.

Later, she surprised Dean on the door, staring at her. He made her heart beat faster than ever, like the last time she saw him. That was bad, very bad. She had healed from her crush on him a long time ago, she hadn’t to fall for him all over again. It was just painful. Too much painful.

«Hi» he said, his voice even lower than she remembered.

«Hey» she said, offering him her beer. «You want some?»

«Why not?»

So, he sat on the other swing. They just seemed two children too grown up for that game.

«How’s uni goin’? I didn’t have the chance to see you after class. It was weird to see you there, even if I was just an assistant of your professor» he said. Y/N chuckled.

«It’s going well. I just need to pass my last exam and then I’ll be free!» she exclaimed, opening her arms as they were a bird’s wings. He laughed. «I think you were very serious, Winchester.»

«Was I?»

«Yes» she answered. Dean was looking at the beer, nodding. «You’re understimating yourself as always, aren’t you?»

«You know me better than anyone else» he said and then drank a sip from his beer.

“And even despite that, I loved you anyway”, she thought.

«You’ve worked so hard for that, Dean. Don’t let anyone take it away from you. You hear me?» she said, pointing a finger at him. Dean smiled.

«Yes’, m’am.»

«Good» she said, chuckling. «I’m your number one fan» she added, then she grabbed the beer from his hands to take another sip because being around him made her nervous, but drinking just made the situation worse. «In fact, I had a pretty bad crush on you when I was younger.»

Dean’s eyes seemed to turn dark, but maybe it was just a wrong impression.

«This is getting interesting» he said, with a grin.

«You didn’t notice it? No? Well, when I was in high school I was head over heels for you. I couldn’t think about anyone else, even if when I dated some other guy. They just… weren’t you.»

«Why didn’t you tell me?» he asked, watching her finishing the beer.

«Because you always took home some very pretty girls and I always thought that I wasn’t enough for you.»

«Who’s understimating herself, now?» Dean said and she laughed.

«Touché.»

Then, Dean took the bottle away from her hands, touching her fingers. He was warm, unlike the weather. She turned to look at Dean, while her arms were now freezing. His gaze was slowly coming down from her eyes to her lips. Her heart was racing in her chest, not letting her breathing properly. He had never looked at her like that. What had changed?

«Here, take my jacket» he said out of the blue, offering her it. «Your nose is red like Rudolph’s.»

She was about to get the jacket with trembling hands, when the voice of her father arrived from the door.

«Y/N! Dean! What are you doing there? Come inside!»

His jacked fell on the grass. Y/N stretched an arm in order to get it, but Dean’s hand was faster. He gave it to her, staring at her figure. She was about to burst into flames.

«Your hands were shaking. Why?» he asked and it was like he was closer to her, because she could feel his scent on herself, the smell of leather and mint.

«You just said that yourself: I’m cold» she lied.

«Or was it because I was too close to you?»

She raised her gaze in order to look at him. His eyes were dark like two black holes.

«Y/N!» Jay called. «Get inside! Now!»

Fortunately, that woke her up. She got up from the swing and came in the house. John and Sam were about to leave, that’s why they were saying goodbye to Jay.

«Is that Dean’s jacket?» Sam asked her, with a grin.

«Y-yes.»

«Hey, whatever you’re doing here, stop it» John said to Dean, when he came inside.

«I’m not doing anything. She was just cold» Dean said, with a shrug. She gave him an eloquent look. He didn’t know that they could play that game together.

Dean winked at her.

«You can keep the jacket, if you want.»

«Nah, I don’t need something to remind me of your cockiness» she said. Sam laughed. Dean nodded, admitting the defeat to himself. «But thanks, though. I was really freezing out there.»

«You’re such a liar, Y/N» Dean murmured at her ear, while she was returning his jacket to him.

«Alright, alright, stop it, kids» Jay said. «Dean, I’ll see you tomorrow at work. John, Sam, we’ll see each other another time. Drive safely.»

«Thank you, Jay» John said.

And then, they were gone. Y/N helped her father to clean up the kitchen, smelling a strange scent nearby her. He was unusually quiet, but she didn’t want to hear something about London or Dean again. She just wanted to go to bed, feeling pretty satisfied about that evening. She didn’t know why, but Jay seemed to understand it and in fact, he didn’t shoot any question.

She got to bed feeling the scent of Dean still on herself.

***

«We can’t study like this» Olivia said, putting the books aside. «What’s bothering you? London again?»

«Oh, believe me, I wish!»

«Is there something more important than London?»

«Well… do you remember that guy I liked back in high school?»

«Who? That idiot that made you feel like you weren’t enough?» Olivia asked and Y/N nodded. «You’re joking, right?»

«I saw him the other night and I think that he was hitting on me.»

«This can’t be real!» she shouted.

«Please, be quiet» Y/N begged her.

«What was his name? Daniel? Dave?»

«Dean.»

«Dean! Yeah, I remember what you told me about him. He was an ass.»

«Nah, he was just stupid. Now he’s not like that anymore» Y/N said, putting her chin on a hand. A part of her was still thinking about his beautiful green eyes and his hands touching hers.

«Hey! You have to pass this exam, remember?» Olivia said.

«Yes, right. Get back to study.»

Olivia agreed with a smile. She was reading the book again, legs crossed on Y/N’s bed, but Y/N couldn’t. Yeah, London was important, but on the other hand, Dean was her first love. She couldn’t think to leave without knowing if he was just playing with her or not. His eyes were insanely dark the other night, when he was looking at her. Was he just glad that another woman had a crush on him or did it mean something to him? And also, why now? She had so many thoughts in her mind. Then, she noticed that Olivia was staring at her. She was wondering was Y/N was thinking and when she got it, her eyes just popped out like she was a puppet.

«Oh, fuck Dean Winchester!»

Someone opened the door. Y/N almost fell from the bed when she saw who had done that. She prayed that he didn’t hear Olivia.

«Was that an insult or an invitation?» Dean asked, his shoulder lying on the door’s jamb. «I’d prefer the second one» he said with a wink in Y/N’s direction.

Of course, he had to hear that, she thought.

«What are you doing here, Dean?» Y/N asked.

«I was working with your Dad. He wanted me to ask you if you girls would like to take a break from studying and come downstairs» he answered. Olivia kept looking at him like he was the Devil, though. «Do we know each other?» Dean asked, but she shaked her head.

«Not really.»

«It’s definitely time to take a break!» Y/N exclaimed.

Olivia went downstairs, but Dean stopped Y/N from doing that. He closed the door behind himself, scaring her. Why would he do that? It was like they were in some cheap rom-com. That was getting worse.

«Look Y/N, I want to apologize about the other night» he said. Oh, she didn’t see it coming. «I’m not that kind of guy anymore and I just want you to know that. It’s just that… this job is everything I have ever wanted and I’m so scared of screwing things up, that it’s like I’m doing that on purpose because I think I don’t really deserve it, so I try in every way possible to screw up my life too to prove it. I don’t want to ruin our friendship. I appreciate what you told me and for that, I promise I won’t use it your weaknesses against you.»

Y/N was overwhelmed by all of that. It seemed like Dean had really became a very mature version of himself and she was really glad he did. Unfortunately, it also made him even more likeable to her.

«Thanks, Dean» she said.

«No problem» he replied with a smile.

And that, that was the moment she knew she fell in love with him all over again. The very start of her downfall.

Two weeks later, she had successfully passed her exam. It was snowing, so she decided to go to a pub near the university with her friends to celebrate. It was Friday night, after all. Olivia came with a gift from her, since she was heading to London and it was a new coat.

«It’s red, but don’t be naive like Little Red Riding Hood» she said, but Y/N didn’t understand what she meant until she didn’t see someone entering from the door. Someone who noticed her and that now was approaching their table.

«Hi! How did your exam go?» Dean asked. Olivia rolled her eyes.

«Well, I just passed it, so I’d say not bad» Y/N answered, happily.

«I knew it! Come here» he said, before he could give her a proper hug. Every inch of her body just burned up.

«Thanks, Dean» she said with a soft smile. She’d have sweared she saw Dean’s eyes shine.

«I’ll leave you to your friends» he said.

She looked at Olivia, who was already shaking her head, but she wanted him to stay really bad, so in the end, after she bit her bottom lip, she called him.

«Dean! Hey, if you’re not busy with your friends, maybe you could… you know… stay.»

Dean smiled and he felt her heart doing a flip.

«Unfortunately I’m here with other professors, but I’ll come around later, is that okay?»

She nodded.

«Yes» she said, lying to him.

Then, the hours passed very quickly. She spent the evening laughing and joking with her friends, but she couldn’t deny that she often glanced at Dean. The thought of being there wih him but far away, killed her from within. It was as if a rib was missing from her body, a limb of her skin that now belonged to him. It belonged to him since she was fifteen, actually.

The pub was about to close. Oliva was very drunk, so she got home with a friend, while the others went away. Maybe it was a dumb idea, but she stayed because of Dean’s promise. Ten minutes later, while she was sitting at the table all alone, someone offered her a beer.

«Hey, I’m here finally» Dean said, taking a seat in front of her.

«Hi» she replied with a tired smile.

Dean wetted his lips before talking.

«I saw your friends leaving and I was wondering… why did you stay here, all alone?» he asked.

Her heart started racing faster and faster in her chest. Did she want him so bad to ruin everything between them? Dean was someone who noticed things so he probably did understand the situation very well. Also, his bad jokes that night at her’s still made her think that maybe he liked her too. Maybe not as much as her, but it was still something. But was it right to settle with someone who didn’t want her completely? Because she wanted Dean in every aspect a human being could be wanted.

«Where’s the catch? Because you said that you didn’t want to use my feelings against me» she said.

Dean clenched his jaw, looking at his hands crossed on the table. He still had the silver ring of his mother. Then, he slowly looked at her, raising his eyelids, so seriously she could swear it was maybe the first time she saw him that way.

«No catch. I just wanna know. You’re free to tell me a lie and I’ll believe it. But please, if you stayed here because you were waiting for me, I’d really love to hear it.»

Her throat was dry.

«Why?»

«Because no one ever did something like this for me. And I know that it probably seem stupid, but it shows me that you care» he answered, with a soft smile on his lips. «So, I’m gonna ask you for the last time, before they kick us out, why did you stay here?»

She swallowed, looking straight into his eyes. They were incredibly green. Constellations of flowers. It was now or never. Her voice was like a winter’s breath, when she spoke.

«For you.»

Then, she couldn’t remember how they arrived to Dean’s apartment, but she remembered very well how his clothes fell on the floor or the way he delicately throw her dress off of her. It was all slowed like in a movie. It almost seemed a dream to her.  

«I’m not doing this, if you don’t want me to» Dean said, his thumb brushing her lips.  

«I want you, Dean. I’ve always wanted you. Always» Y/N said and then, Dean kissed her so hard, they crumbled on the bed.

She felt the coldness of his ring on her back, while his fingertips were caressing it. Their lips found each other and a spark was born, fuse of the Apocalypse. She felt like collapsing, cut into two parts, completely folded as a blooming flower.

He completed them. Every single empty space. He filled them all.

«Could you repeat it, please? Always.»

She smiled on his lips.

«Always» she whispered, between the kisses. «Always.»

And she kept repeating it all night.

***

She looked at him like he wasn’t supposed to be there, but she was glad he was. It was her graduation day. They’ve been together for three months, without their fathers knowing it, but Sam and Olivia were well aware of that. Never in a million years she would have thought to see that day. To actually see Dean there, standing between her father and Sam, clapping at her with a smile so bright on his face, she could swear it could cure every disease. It was so pure, but mostly, happy and it was all for her. She held back the tears, but it was, without a doubt, the most important day of her life. The most beautiful one. Maybe having faith did help at something.

She got back to Jay, who hugged her tight and said something like My baby has graduated now in a very proud tone of voice. She also hugged John and Sam, before she could finally look at Dean.

«You did it» he said.

«I did it» she repeated, blushing, even if she didn’t know why. He had that influence on her.

«I knew you would have made it» he said and then, he did something she wouldn’t thought he would have done. He kissed her.

It was like her whole world fell apart. He cupped her cheeks and gave her a gentle kiss on her lips. She felt her whole chest burning because of that, her skin collapsing between his hands.

When they parted, she saw the light in his eyes and bit her bottom lip. It was an authentic moment of pure joy. The emotion in his gaze was real. He was real. It was like the universe had accepted every desire she wished for, every year for six years. He meant it. And he was there to see her succeed.

Thank you, her lips mimed.

But his answer surprised her once again: I love you.

She didn’t even have the time to elaborate his words, that her father spoke: «What just happened?»

She felt it. That was the moment he was about to tear Dean away from her. The moment she didn’t want to come. The moment everything fell apart like a castle made of sand. She felt the coldness in her bones, like a warning.

«Jay, please…» John tried to say, but Jay stopped him with the sign of his hand.

«You’re not getting away with this, Dean» Jay said and Dean just shrugged, like it was normal to him.

«I don’t understand, Jay. Did I offend you in any way?» he asked, calmly.

«We’ll talk later.»

And then, she understood. He kissed her on purpose becase it was a public place, so Jay couldn’t say anything because of his reputation, but now he knew about them. Clever, very clever.

After the ceremony, Dean took her hand and they just hid behind the stage. He kissed her, his hands everywhere and nowhere along her dress, that ascended her legs, her stomach, her waist.

«You think you’re smart, Winchester?» she asked, while he was sucking the skin of her neck.

«I think I’m utterly smart, as a matter of fact» he said, looking at her with messy hair and dark eyes.

God, he was so beautiful in that moment.

She laughed. A laugh so clear and free that made Dean smile like a child. It was so unreal.

«He’s gonna kill you, you know that?»

«I already spent three months of Heaven with you, who cares?»

«Heaven? Damn, I have to be a wild fire in bed.»

«Oh, trust me baby, you are» he said and she laughed again.

«Come on now, Sam and your friends are waiting for us. We’re gonna get so drunk tonight, you’re not gonna even remember your own name!» he said with an excited voice, kissing her hand.

«But I’ll certainly still remember you» she replied, with two images of Dean in her eyes like two comets. He gave her a delicate kiss on her lips.

«You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me, Y/N.»

The next day, Dean got up in a strange room. He wasn’t in his apartment for sure. It looked very different. He looked at his watch: 11 AM. What did he do last night? And then, when he turned, he saw the answer: the girl of his dreams was sleeping next to him. He caressed her hair, left a kiss on her temple and then put on his clothes.

When he got downstairs, he immediately met her father in the kitchen. He saw Dean while he was drinking a cup of coffee.

«’Morning, Jay» he said.

Jay groaned in his direction. He was surely still angry at him. He wanted to talk to him, but he had a terrible headache due to the hungover, so he wasn’t at his best. He sat down at the table, thinking about his next move, when Jay gave him a cup of coffee and an Aspirine.

«I talk, you take this» he started. «Look Dean, we’ve been knowing for years by now and we’re also colleagues, so I think I can say that I know you pretty well. You’re a very good guy, but you’re also a hard person to love. You’re scared of being left behind and for that, I suggest you to use this fear of yours to break up with my daughter.»

Dean almost spilled his tea on Jay.

«What?»

«You heard me. You’re gonna hurt her sooner or later, I know what you do. You think you can take advantage of her, just because she’s been in love with you since she was fifteen?» he asked. Dean looked confused: how did he find that out? Did Y/N tell him? «I’m a single father of a girl, Dean. I had to learn a lot of things. I noticed the way he looked at you. Hell, she still looks at you like that!» he exclaimed. Dean felt flattered about that, but he was still scared of what Jay just said. «I want you to break up with her. Just what you usually do, I think you’re pretty good at that by now.»

And that hurt. Jay was like a second father to him, a friend in some way, a role model and now he was just destroying their relationship. It was too much to handle.

«Jay, I know you’re just trying to protect her, but we’re adults now and…»

«She’s only twenty-one, Dean! She doesn’t even know what life is. She had to understand that hard work pays, that’s why she has to go to London. Life’s not a fairy tale.»

«I get it, but why London? I mean, she could look for some job here or…» Dean tried to argue, but Jay’s glance explained it all to him. And it was heartbreaking. «London was her best chance to forget me, wasn’t it? Your plan has always been this: sending her as far away as possible from me. You helped me to get the job at your university so you could make sure that I couldn’t leave it to follow her» he said. His back slipped along the chair, his throat dry. «You never admired me. It was all a lie.»

«No Dean, don’t get me wrong: I’ve always put my faith on you, because I knew that you were capable of doing great things, but you’re not the perfect fit for my daughter. It’s just as simple as that.»

«You came up with a fucking plan to take her away from me and now you’re even playing the martyr here?» Dean shouted, getting up from the seat. «You’re a monster, Jay. You don’t love your daughter, if you don’t let her decide what she wants from life. And for the record, I’ve changed. I’m not that fuckboy anymore. But maybe you were too busy thinking about your stupid plan to realize that» Dean said and then he got out from the house.

He was furious with Jay. He had always put nothing but trust in that man, confessing him every fear, every thought, every memory and now he just betrayed him like that. He wanted to punch a wall so bad, in that moment. But the worst thing he couldn’t believe he was thinking was that despite all of that, Jay knew that he would have done that.

And he knew that too.

He had avoided her for two days. Olivia had already told her that he was back to his old habits, but she didn’t believe it. Dean had grown. He was not the same guy of some years ago, he was trustworthy and reliable now. A lot people just kept seeing him as someone who wasn’t serious just because that was they wanted to see.

Then, he called.

«Y/N?»

«Hey, Dean.»

«Can we meet, please? I have to tell you something.»

She swallowed.

«Yes, of course. Where?»

«At mine’s. Twenty minutes.»

«Okay. Dean, are you alright?»

«See you later, Y/N.»

He was definitely not fine.

Anyway, she got there twenty minutes later. He opened the door, never even glanced at her and made her enter. He looked terrible, like he didn’t sleep at all for two days. He had dark circles under his eyes and he looked very pale. He had some grey sweatpants on and a white t-shirt. It was like turning back time and seeing him when he was studying for the last year of high school. He seemed so lost back then and he seemed so lost now too. It was heartbreaking.

«Dean?»

«Y/N, this could be the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do» he began, running a hand through his hair.

«If that’s because I didn’t say it back, you don’t have to…»

«What?» he asked. He seemed so confused. «No, it’s not that.»

«Then what happened, Dean?» she asked, getting closer to him, but he made a step back.

«Please, don’t. Just… don’t» he said. It was like a weight was expanding in his chest. «Y/N, we have to break up» he said, raising his eyelids to look at her in a way that had always made her heart do a flip. But now, it was just tragically painful.

«What? Why?»

«Because you’re going to London now and I don’t do long-distance relationships.»

She made a noise of disbelief.

«You’re joking, right? Please, tell me that you’re joking. This is so stupid.»

«Look, I’ve been abandonded by my Mom when I was a child and you know that. I just don’t want you to leave me too. And London it’s your best chance for a brighter future.»

«You’re what, Freud, now?» she asked, incredulous. It was all ridiculous.

«Just respect my decision, okay? You’ll find someone better than me, I promise» he said, but he could barely look at her while he was doing that. It costed him an enormous amount of strength to say those words.

She sighed, defeated within her bones.

«So, it was all a lie, uh?» she asked, holding back the tears.

Dean clenched his jaw, shaking his head.

«No, of course not. It was all true and we were real, Y/N. It’s just that we can’t do this anymore.»

«You’re breaking up with me after you said you loved me, in a very emotionless way and I should believe that…? Listen Dean, I’m not buying it. Did my Dad forced you to do this?» she asked, coming closer to him. Dean swallowed, without looking at her. She said he wasn’t feeling anything, but she was wrong. He felt something. He felt his whole body burning up just because of her breath near him, but he coudn’t say it. «You can’t even look at me in the eye… You’re gonna regret it, Dean. You’re not coming back from this.»

«Good, because I don’t want to» he replied, with his best poker face. He really seemed cruel. He had to.

She bit her bottom lip.

«I hope you’re satisfied with this ending. I’m certainly not.»

«Endings are never easy. I’m sorry, kiddo.»

«I hate when you call me like that, now» she said, her throat dry as the desert. He used to call her like that when she was younger. It was like he cared about her, but making a distance between them at the same time. Dean looked at his bare feet, feeling so guilty. «You used to call me like that, when we were just friends.»

«But that’s the matter, Y/N: we were never friends» he said, trying to hurt her even more.

«Well, fuck you, Dean!» she yelled, angrily.

«I’m sorry, ba… Y/N.»

«Fuck you, Dean» she repeated, then she surpassed him to get to the door, but she stopped halfway through it. She bit her bottom lip, then she turned to look at him, who was confused. «You know what, Dean? Fuck you, because you think I don’t know. I heard you shouting the other day, I can only imagine what my father said to you» she said. Dean’s eyes grew wide at that realization. It hit him right in the ribs. «You’ve always understimated yourself, but I did too. Now I know that we were wrong. I remember when you brought me home one night, after the school’s dance. I looked at your face, half soaked in light and you know, you had these crystal green eyes that made me think about a lighthouse, because it helps ships come back to the shore and I thought... I thought they could bring me back home. You’ve always been my home» she said, with tears in her eyes.

Dean felt a lump in his throat, that maybe him unable to talk.

«Please, don’t do this» he begged her.

«Look Dean, I’ve been in love with you for six years now. I blamed it on the alcohol, but since we’re two adults, let’s be honest here: I wanted to say it to you. I wanted you to know that. I hid that for a long time, I was capable of keep going with it, but I didn’t. But since I’m an adult, I also know that life’s not a fairy tale, so when it seemed that you liked me too, I just took the chance. It could have lasted a day or a year, I just wanted that. You. Us. I wanted all of it. I fell in love with you every fucking day for the past six years and despite your bad behaviour sometimes, I still loved you. Or maybe I did because of that, I don’t know. So please, respect my heart and tell me right now, right now Dean, if you’ve ever felt something for me, because I think you owe me this, at least. It’s alright even if you didn’t, but tell me the truth. I think that after everything we’ve been trough, I deserve it. I’m asking you for just one thing.»

Dean looked like he was about to fall apart. His eyes were glossy and red at the corners.

«Repeat the question, please.»

It reminded her of the night at the pub. She nodded, swallowing.

«Did you feel something for me?»

And then, Dean answered something she couldn’t see it coming in six years.

«I did» he said. And then, with his eyes full of tears, he added: «I do.»

She let slip a sob out of her throat.

«Then why are you doing this? Don’t listen to my father and stay with me» she said, caressing his cheek. Dean closed his eyes, leaning into her touch.

«Because I think you should go to London anyway. It’s your best chance. I dont deserve you. I never did. It was just a pretty good fantasy I wanted to believe in.»

She took a step back. His cheek suddenly seemed too cold.

«This is not about you Dean, it’s about me! It’s about the fact that I want you and trust me, besides the graduation, I’ve never wanted anything so bad in my entire life like I want you right now» she said. That word had always been a very strong word for her and now Dean did too. «You were the love of my life when I was young. You still are» she whispered, right before her voice cracked up.

Dean sighed, defeated into his bones.

«I’m sorry, Y/N. I don’t know what else to say.»

And then, she walked away. Dean closed his eyes, feeling like he couldn’t breathe. He had to let her go. She had to go to London, to go away from there. She wasn’t supposed to stay. He just had to accept that. Her father was right: she deserved the world and he was just stopping her from having it.

But she was right about one thing: he was gonna regret it. For the rest of his life.

***

«Are you ready for London?» Olivia asked on FaceTime, smiling. She shrugged. «Y/N, please, stop thinking about Dean. He just made you waste plenty of time. You’re gonna forget about him, you’ll see.»

«Just be honest, Olivia: you never liked him» she said, annoyed.

Olivia sighed.

«I liked him, Y/N. » she confessed, surprisingly. «That’s why I wanted you to never have something with him. Because I knew that he would have anchored you here and you don’t belong to Lebanon. You have the skills to do anything you want. Don’t make a man or anybody, stop you.»

«You knew he liked me?»

«I knew he was head over heels for you the moment he leaned an eye on you the first time I’ve met him» Olivia said.

She held back the tears.

«Thanks, Olivia.»

«You’re welcome. Now pack your things. Tomorrow’s almost here!»

But is that a good day without Dean by her side?

She had just left. He saw her going to the airport on a Taxi. The last time he had seen her had been awful, but this one? This was way worse. Because he didn’t get to actually see her. He just knew it was her in that car, slipping away from his fingers.

«Dean?» Jay called, on the threshold of the door.

«I’m here to talk to you» Dean said, firmly.

Jay let him in, wondering what he could possibily wanted now. He seemed so sure of himself, like he had never been. Maybe he really grew up, somehow. And he didn’t even notice.

«What do you want from me, Dean?»

«You know, I never really got the chance to thank you, Jay. I mean, you helped me get into college, become a professor, make me a father when John wasn’t there… I’m really grateful for that. And you know, I broke up with your daughter as you asked me to, even if I hated every second of what I did. But didn’t give me a chance to explain myself or maybe I just wouldn’t take it, because I was too busy thinking that I wasn’t enough. I did it for almost all of my life, you know that and you never told me that it was bullshit. You know who did? Your daughter» Dean said. Jay clenched his jaw. «So, since I’ve figured out I’m better than the fuckboy you get to know, thanks to her too, I just want to say to you that I’m in love with her and I would have done anything to make her happy, anything» Dean said, with a lump in his throat. It took him a lot to actually say those words out loud. But he was glad he finally did. «She’s the only one. She’s the one for me, Jay. I love her and even if I’m terrified about this, I want to be with her. I just want to be around her until I can and until she’ll let me to. Please, don’t take this away from me. Please» he begged him.

Jay put a hand on his shoulder, nodding.

«I appreciate your words son, I really do, but I can’t let you stop her. I’m sorry.»

Dean took a step back, disappointed.

«No, you’re not.» Dean said, with disgust in his voice. «You know what? Screw you, Jay. I’m gonna get her back and I’m gonna follow her to London. I won’t spend another day without her. We already lost too many of them.»

And with that, he was already in his Impala to get to her. He arrived at the airport and began to look for her the second he took a foot inside. But since life’s not a fairy tale, when he found her gate, it was already too late.

She was gone.

He got back at his apartment, sighing. He had lost her forever and the worst part of that was that he had done that to himself. He opened the door and felt empty.

«Dean» someone whispered his name in a soft tone.

He turned to look at Y/N behind him, who was getting up from the stairs.

«Y/N? What are you doing here?»

«I didn’t leave. Can I come in, please?»

He nodded.

«Sure.»

She entered.

«A good friend told me that I was capable of doing anything I wanted and I thought that letting my Dad decide about my future was not what I wanted. That’s why I got back» she explained. «But I don’t want you to stop me either. So I’m just here to tell you that I’ll move to Chicago, so I can use my degree properly» she said. Dean lacked of words. «That’s it? I mean, I didn’t think you could say something like I’ll come with you, sweetheart, but maybe…»

«I was at the airport» he finally said.

«What?» she asked, confused.

«Your father didn’t give me the permission to go after you, but I did it anyway. I was ready to go to London with you» he confessed, clenching his jaw.

«Really?»

«Yes» he said and he was about to fall into pieces for saying that. «Chicago sounds alright too. I don’t really care.»

«But your job… and you hate flying!» she exclaimed.

«I’d hate to spend the rest of my life without you, sweetheart» he said, caressing her shoulders with a smile. «Is it a better answer than the one you expected?»

She nodded, a lump in her throat.

«It’s the best answer you could ever give to me» she said, before he kissed her.

[wildlittlefoxsworld]

Loving you against all odds | The Old Guard | Andy x Fem!Reader

Part 1

A/N: I got this idea from a prompt of @promptsforthestrugglingauthor.

You find it here.

Summary: Andy meet the reader in San Francisco in 1929. The reader is twenty-three years old and will marry her fianceé in a few weeks. Andy and the reader get very close, but is this enough for the reader to stop the wedding? Leaving her family to be together with Andy? A family curse makes the reader's life difficult and the reader will need to fight for what her heart desires.

Warnings: slow burn, family curse, minor character death and temporary main character death (in later parts), soft Andy, more tags follow

The Old Guard Masterlist

***

San Francisco, 1929

As the firstborn, you had never worried about the family curse; every second child was doomed to short life of misfortune, but everyone else was left unharmed.

But after your father passed and your mother remarried a partner with a child older than you, you discovered that the curse considered step-siblings as part of the order. But you only noticed it when it was almost too late.

The life of your younger sister Mary, the second the child of your mother, was filled with castastrophic incidents since the day she was born. As a premature infant the pediatrists gave her a loss expectation of life, but your mother called Mary a miracle when she was allowed to take yor sister home after twenty weeks in the children's hospital.

Mary was of slight build, always smaller as the children of her age, caused by the consequences of two months born premature. Children were cruel and made fun of her. You were three years older than her, which made you her protector on the schoolyard. It was something your mother had wished for, but you were well-informed about the family curse. Unlike your mother you understood the impacts the curse had on Mary. Everyone were powerless, nobody could stem Mary's future of never ending misery.

Nobody, until the day your mother married a rich, kind-hearted man named Chandler Prescott. His first wife died a few years ago and together they had a son, Jonah Prescott. Handsome, tall, icy-blue eyes, dark-brown hair. A boy that broke every girl's heart one day. You never hated him, nor did you liked him.

The summer you, Mary and your mother moved in with the Prescotts will you never forget, it was very sticky for early June and you remembered the smell of azaleas, this time changed your life irrevocable.

You were curious of the new town where you lived now. Unknown and mysterious places to discover, but always the voice of your father in the back of your head: never trust strangers. You did follow this rule on every day and it came a day when you didn't. In a little café a half hour by feet away from your home, you met a brunette women, a few years older, maybe in her early thirties. Pretty green eyes, tall, slim figure, very athlectic. You couldn't tell what was special about the woman, but you were impressed by her.

The curve of her mouth formed a charming smile and you felt your stomach doing a flip. It was a foreign feeling when you looked at her, but you ignored it and left the café hurriedly.

The next Wednesday you found your way miraculously back to the little café you liked so much. And there was a spark of hope you would see the stunning woman with the green eyes again. Your eyes roamed the room for her, but you were dissapointed when she wasn't anywhere to find.

“Hello,” spoke a melodic voice behind you and you flinched slightly. You turned your head and looked at the woman that haunted your mind for an entire week. “Hi,” you replied shyly.

“I hoped to meet you again,” she acknowledged and smiled at you. Her gaze was earnestly and you felt your cheeks heating up. You had the same feeling in your stomach as last Wednesday, it was familiar with your typical reaction when a handsome man had complimented you.

“I'm glad to see you. My apologies… for leaving so fast … last week.” You wondered that her presence made you nervous and stuttering. “Well, you came back today,” she appreciated.

She told you her name was Andy. No surname. You respected it and she was relieved that you didn't ask questions about her origin. You spend the whole afternoon together, time flew by like the wind. You talked about casual things, your childhood and parents, but the curse wasn't a topic. And Andy simply listened. You had the feeling that she was the first person in your life who was really interested in you. The moment for your goodbyes came and she hugged you like an old friend. You agreed to meet on next Wednesday at the same time.

At the weekend your mother was buzzing with excitement when the daily newspaper arrived and she read the announcement on page three that the heir, Aaron Grey, of the richest bank director of San Fracisco will marry you on 28th of July in St. Margret's Cathedral.

At twenty-three you could call yourself lucky to get a outstanding match with an noble man like Aaron Grey. You met him at one of the countless parties your step-father hosted. You danced the whole evening with Aaron and you fell in love his his dark brown eyes and warm-hearted laugh. At least you thought it was love you felt.

You couldn't await Wednesday. Andy sat at the same table and you sat down across from her. Her charming smile was back the second she looked at you and a warm feeling spreaded in your chest. You felt bad for the blink of an eye, because you never were so happy when Aaron smiled at you. But you brushed it off, you needed to know him better first.

You forget about Aaron on this afternoom completely. Andy spoke of the places she visited in her life and you decided that you want to see them, each of them. Andy chuckled and responded vague she would take you there someday, but you saw in her eyes she wished for it.

When you walked home, after you promised Andy to come next Wednesday, you thought about your up-coming wedding and if you should tell your new friend about it. Shouldn't you be happy to marry a good man like Aaron Grey. You weren't. In your mind were only green eyes and a charming smile.

Aaron picked you up for dinner with his parents in one these fancy restaurants at Friday night. His parents were very polite and friendly. Aaron and his father talked about business and his mother couldn't wait to have grandchildren. In your opinion the evening was a disaster. But you assured Aaron how lovely his parents were and you looked forward to marry him. You lied to him. You were dissapointed of the outlooks for your future, but you still hoped it will get better. Anyway you liked Aaron and you were sure he would be a caring husband.

The meetings with Andy on Wednesdays were becoming a routine. You entered the café punctual at 2.30 p.m. and spotted Andy in your usual corner. You learned she loved her coffee black, no milk or sugar. You approached her and noticed the white mug with hot chocolate. She remembered your favorite and you beamed with delight. A simple gesture that showed you she cared.

Your conversations were easy, you found always topics you could discuss and you were impressed how adept Andy was in arts, history, languages and travelling. She talked about those things like she had expierenced all of it, like she lived hundreds of lives. Yet you didn't know what she did for living, but you knew she lived with good friends in a cottage at the outskirts of town, near a forest with a lake. She was always vague with informations of her current life and spoke only about her past. One time you asked about her family and she went silent, her mouth a thin line and her eyes cold that it made you shivering, she answered they were passed away a long time ago. You never asked her again.

At home you didn't tell your mother or sister about Andy. She was your only friend here and you wanted something for yourself. You knew it was selfish, but you were sure Andy wouldn't like to be pomped for information about her life.

On the Wednesday three weeks before your wedding she brought you a gift. A box full of conch shells she collected all over the world in different shapes and colours. You loved it. You took a few in your hands and admired their beauty. But you had to admit you never saw more appealing or dazzling than Andy. Sadly you weren't brave enough to tell her. Little did you know she thought the same about you.

The box got a special place in your room.

A week later you had your usual drinks. Andy seemed pensive.

“Are you alright?” you asked her worriedly and knitted your brows together. Andy nodded slowly and glanced outside on the street. It was a sunny day, no cloud in the sky and pleasant warm.

“Would you like to take a walk? There's a park around the corner,” she suggested smiling suddenly. You were excited. You never went anywhere else with Andy than the café.

“Sounds good,” you agreed. Your mugs were already empty and you followed her out of the café. She walked elegant, her back straight and head up. Andy was confident and you wished sometimes you would be like her. She was free to go wherever she wanted and you would marry a man in one and half weeks who you didn't love. The more time you spend with Andy, the less you were in Aaron's company.

The park was marvelous, pink and red and yellow and white flowers everywhere. You weren't the only people here and you walked along the gravel walks.

“It's long a time ago that I was in park. Well, with someone else than the people I live with,” Andy confessed. “I feel honored,” you replied truthfully.

You knew that Andy didn't have many close friends and you were happy that she considered you as a friend. You were lost in thoughts and didn't notice that you went into an area of the park where was only Andy and you. You didn't mind privacy, but it took you by surprise when Andy interlaced your fingers with hers. You watched her with widened eyes, but when you noticed her insecurity, you felt sorry for your reaction. Your expression softened.

“Is this okay?” she asked carefully. You nodded smiling slightly and squeezed her hand in reassurance. Andy's touch, feeling her warm and smooth skin, made your heart beating faster and your stomach flutter. You thought a lot about the feelings you had for Andy and admitted it was more than a friendship between two women. You read about feelings for the same gender and it wasn't common in the society. But your private life wasn't an issue of the society. You knew your mother expected from you to marry and have children, but in this moment you got doubts if you could ever be a loving wife for Aaron and if the wedding was the right decision. Andy made you to question every decision of your potential future and you thought if you could have a future with Andy.

Andy savoured every minute with you. She felt so alive like she hadn't in centuries and you made her life brighter. She hoped that you cared for her as much as she cared for you. Andy was happy when you didn't pull your hand away and it was a milestone. She knew that you were mortal, but maybe the both of you could make it work, even if these thoughts were ridiculous.

Andy felt like someone watched you both behind her back and glanced over her left shoulder. Not far away stood Booker and nodded once. Something was wrong and she knew it was time for her to leave today.

“I'm devasted, Y/N, but I need to go. I know we usually spend more time together,” Andy declared and her heart ached a little when she saw you were dissapointed. “It has nothing to do with you. A friend need my help,” she added hastily.

Andy didn't want to leave you and she thought about what would make you smile. She looked down at your hands and got an risky idea. She lose your hands and pulled you in a gentle hug. She rubbed the small of your back and then shortly before she pulled back, a feathery kiss was pressed on your cheek. You felt your heart racing and the blush rised up your neck. The skin tingled where her lips touched and you smiled bashfully.

“I'm fine, Andy. Go help your friend,” you responded. Of course, you were sad that she wanted to leave so early. You only had one and a half hour together, usually you spend three to four in the café and you were glad about Andy's choice to walk in park. It made up for her early leaving.

With a small nod she went the way back you came before and you watched after her until you couldn't see her anymore.

*****

“She is a pretty, young woman, boss,” Booker remarked with a half grin.

“I know,” Andy answered simple.

“She seems nice.”

“Yes, she is.”

“Is it then wise to make her any hopes?” Booker accused and Andy stopped walking. She looked back to you and shook her head. “It's too soon to assume that.”

“I don't think she was uncomfortable when you kissed her,” he interjected. Andy snorted and went to the car she parked down the street.

“I didn't kiss her,” she gainsaid.

Andy groaned annoyed. “I don't know if I tell her. I know her for five weeks. It's not like… well, I will see.”

“But it was close. Next time it will be her mouth,” Booker said shrugging. “I only recommend you to be careful. She's mortal. She will age. Does she know you don't?”

Booker glanced at Andy when she started the engine of the car and pulled out into traffic. She didn't want to think about the possibilities she could have with you, how it felt to be loved by someone she loved back. You were the first human that catched her interest in her entire life. She spent time with you, because she liked you, but she didn't know it was worth it to risk everything because she could fall im love with you.

“How got you here?” Andy asked to switch the topic. She needed to be focused and concentrated for the mission. There wasn't any other reason she knew about why Booker would come to get her.

“Nicky and Joe dropped me off. Their already on the way. We will meet them at a dinner,” he explained and Andy nodded.

“Good.” The drive was silent and Andy tried hard to suppress the memory of the shimmer in your eyes after she kissed your cheek.

The job went off without a hitch and Andy was statisfied with the precise and flawless teamwork. She only suffered a few injuries from gun shots and a knife, but she didn't die this time and everything was already healed.

“Good job,” she told her family members and they drove back to the flat they stayed in a small town in the north Texas.

Andy's thoughts wandered to you and she asked herself if you would want a life like that. Always on the run, without knowing what will come tomorrow. And could she on the opposite settle down with you. Spending fifty or sixty years or a little more with you before the nature would take back the life it gave you.

Andy took a deep breath. She had to make a choice: destroying the tender bonding between you or letting her feelings grow for you and risking that it could break her heart.

***

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[theonetheycallhannah]

The Treatment of Captain Syverson-Chapter Four: E-Stim

Pairing: Captain “Sy” Syverson x OFC (Shane Benton)

Summary: Shane deals with the consequences of her email to her boss, both good and bad. A mortifying situation has an…unexpected outcome. Emotions run high in the fourth chapter of The Tx of Sy! Behind on the action? Catch up HERE! 

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: Language, some angst and emotions. (Like I literally cried writing part of it) And like, an asshole boss…but if you stick it out with Susan, you won’t be disappointed.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately for me, Henry is not mine, le sigh, and all mention of him, his characters, any characters from his films, or his precious doggy, Kal, are strictly for transformative and recreational use. I neither ask for, nor accept payment for the work I post on Tumblr or AO3. Unbeta’d because this is for fun and escapism.

Tags:

@onlyhenrys

 @cavillryarchive

 @summersong69

 @titty-teetee

 @bloodyinspiredfuck

 @agniavateira

@oddsnendsfanfics

(you didn’t ask, but i took the liberty! Hope that’s okay!)

@tumblnewby @suavechops

Shane had spent her morning getting ready for work and treating her first patient with a whopping headache…maybe a small glass of wine would have been more responsible of her. But she slept like the dead, which was the goal.

She took a moment before her second patient to check her email…there was a reply from Susan.

Shane, come to my office at your next possible availability.

No "thank you" or "please" or "fuck you very much." just an order. Last she checked, SHE wasn't in the military. Since Heather wasn't in yet, she messaged the secretary on duty, Marsha, to see if she could find a way to make an opening in her morning. She wanted to get this meeting over with.

Sure, Shane. Looks like Cory could take your next patient, if you like. He's seen him before.

Perfect. Please make that change and block me for a meeting with Susan. Thank you so much.

She saw Cory walk by, and warned him. "Cory, I'm having Marsha move Mr. Greenbaum to you next hour. I need to meet with Susan about something." she rolled her eyes.

"Oh, shit. Okay. No problem." Cory knew all too well the fuckery that a Susan meeting could entail.

"I really appreciate it. I owe you big time."

"Nah, Mr. G is cool. We just talk about huntin' and stuff."

"He'll probably like that we switched, then." she laughed. And headed for what felt like the principal's office. Bleak and miserable.

She knocked on the door, and was told in an all too cheerful manner to come in.

"Hey!"

"Morning Susan."

"Close the door and have a seat, Shane."

She typed away for a moment before fully engaging…as was her way. She thought it gave her the power. It really just annoyed the fuck out of everyone.

"So, tell me what's going on with this patient you emailed me about."

"Well, he's an ACL and MCL tear, traumatic, plus a dislocated patella. He did it during a mission in Iraq. Ummm, he's improving a lot. Potter did the surgery. He had him keep the crutches about two weeks longer than we thought he would, but--"

"No I mean…this relationship. What's the deal, here?"

"Oh, there's not much to say about it, really. He's been fairly flirty from pretty early on. I've been able to ignore it, but to be honest, I think he's a really great guy, and I think he deserves better than me ignoring his advances, especially when, to be honest Susan, the feelings he has for me are not unrequited." her heart was racing. More than if Sy had been in the room flirting with her, but so much less pleasant.

"I don't think you should see this guy until the treatment is over. What if it doesn't work out and he doesn't want to come here anymore because of you." That hurt…not that it wasn't rattling around in her head, too.

"Well, Susan, to be honest, that's one reason I haven't spoken up about this already. I have that fear. But he's been very adamant about it lately, and it's been on my mind a lot, and I think I owe it to the both of us to see it through."

"I think I should call this guy. Let me pull him up."

She gave her his details to get his information pulled up in their system. God, this was embarrassing. She should have known this nightmare was coming.

"Hello?" a gravelly bark came across the speakerphone.

"Hello, Mr. Syverson?"

"Captain Syverson, yes, Ma'am." She wasn't expecting him to pull rank…and he did it so politely.

"Sorry, Captain Syverson. My name is Susan DeForrest, I'm the manager here at Fort Wood Therapy Clinic. How are you this morning?"

"This side of the daisies ain't worth complainin. What can I do ya for, ma'am?"

"Well, I have Miss Benton, your therapist here in a meeting. You're on speaker."

"Hey Sy." Shane mewled sheepishly.

"Hey there, Shane." she could hear the smile in his voice. She didn't know if Susan could.

"She's saying that the two of you would like to see each other socially, outside of therapy."

"Oh, that's not quite the words I'd use, ma'am, but I s'pose you're technically correct."

"And she's explained to you that this facility has a policy in place regarding such fraternization?" What a load of bullshit she was shoveling. Making it sound so sinister and clandestine what she and Sy were trying to start up. Like espionage. This woman…

"I'm aware that certain policies exist like that to protect patients or customers, and more frequently the staff from situations that could present problems for both or either parties. I am not aware that a strict policy exists to police your staff in such a stringent manner. In fact, I know the opposite to be true."

"Excuse me?" Susan asked, shell shocked.

"See, them policies o' yours, they're all available online. Public knowledge. Even your personnel ones. Now, y'all have a nice and thorough handbook, I mean, I have been up all night just pouring over this like honey on toast, and I can tell you, I ain't findin' a word about y'all not being allowed to date your patients."

"Well, it's in policy number…"

"Nope, you were gonna say 47, subsection 2, part b. But that just says that you shouldn't treat anyone you're close to (i.e. friend, relative, or significant other) if you can't maintain objectivity or your own comfortability. Now, if I'd make Shane uncomfortable, or if she lost her objectivity over me, I'd be devastated. Shane, do I or do you think I could make you uncomfortable or unobjective?" he was laying it on so thick. If she hadn't been falling for him, this would have done it.

"I don't think so, Sy." She held back a smile…but not well.

"There ya have it. Miss DeForrest, I trust that Shane is free to live her life in the way she sees fit?"

"Well, I still think she should wait…" Susan started, but was cut off again by Sy.

"Because you see, I've seen a lot of young people fail to grow old. A lot of people waitin' to do things…they never ended up doin'. This life…it can be real, real short, Miss DeForrest. And I'm not keen on waitin' to be happy when I could be happy right now. Have I made myself clear enough for you? Or do I need to go to the next link in the chain of command here?" The emotion and resolve in his voice was completely shattering. He wasn't crying. But Shane and Susan both were. And then suddenly, Susan sniffed herself into composure and answered him with dignity.

"No, Captain Syverson. That will not be necessary. Shane…is free, of course, to socialize with whomever she sees fit so long as it doesn't affect anyone's treatment adversely. Thank you for your time, candor, and perspective, sir."

"I'm glad to help Shane. She's helped me more than any therapist I've ever had. We clicked immediately. I knew she was somethin' special. But getting to know her over the last few weeks has shown me what true happiness could feel like…I'd forgotten that over in Iraq. She gave that back to me. I'd like to thank her properly."

"I think she'd like that too. Thank you, sir." Susan hung up the phone without letting them say goodbye to each other, but Shane was an utter mess, and unable to form coherent words right now, anyway.

"Wow." Susan exclaimed.

"Yeah." Shane sniffed into a tissue, dabbing her eyes and then blowing her nose loudly, and unapologetically.

"Did he say he spent the whole night reading our policies?" Susan asked, not sure she heard him right.

"That's what I understood." Shane was somehow not surprised.

"Did you tell him to do that?"

"I didn't even know the policies were online, nor did I know you'd pull him in to our meeting…I didn't even know we were having one until twenty minutes ago."

"Right…fair. Sorry, I'm still…off-put by all of that." She had been beaten…and it wasn't familiar or comfortable.

"So, are we finished here?" Shane inquired, tentative about the state of mind her boss was in.

"Yes, go on and take the rest of the hour for continuing ed or whatever." She was normally much more composed…Sy had really gotten to her. She loved it.

Shane hurried back to her treatment room. She had to call him.

"Hello?" that same gravelly voice now confused as he'd just hung up with her, basically.

"May I speak to the great hero Captain Syverson, please?"

"Sunshine. How ya doin'?"

"Did you really stay up all night last night to read our entire employee manual?"

"I wanted the straight up, true life details about this policy that could mess up my future."

"I think you broke my boss's brain. She was still stewing when I left. She thought I told you where to find all that and what not. I didn't even know you could find it online. Plus, I didn't know we'd be meeting or that she'd drag you into a personnel matter. She's the worst. And you're literally my hero for beating her down like you did."

"Hey, ya know, she started it. I just finished it."

"You sure did. And how!"

"So…since we're all legal now…"

"Is the magic gone since it's not forbidden?" she laughed.

"Oh, I was gonna say, yeah, I think this may be a mistake. Sorry."

They both giggled.

"I'm free after work on Friday." she suggested.

"Not anymore, you're not. Bring some nice clothes and change when you're done. I'll pick you up after. Just text me when you're about ready?"

"You haven't given me your number, Sy."

"It's in my chart, dork."

"You have to officially give it to me."

"Oh I'll give it to ya, baby." He'd dug deep into the bass part of his register for that one.

"Syyyyy." she groaned.

"Oh, you already know I like it when you say my name."

"I'm being serious right now, what's your damn number or the date is off." She bluffed.

"Not because I believe that idle threat, but because I wanna…give it to ya." he rattled off the number.

"Okay, I'll be texting you with mine. Now, I have work today, so if you text me and don't get an immediate response, you know that's why."

"I'm not your only patient? I'm hurt, Shane."

"I know, that's why you've been coming to therapy for weeks."

"Har-Har, good thing I'm not into you for your sense of humor."

"Good thing I'm not into you for your looks, since 80% of your face is obscured by hair."

"We could go all day like this."

"The stamina." she teased.

"Well, look who joined the game!" he sounded almost proud.

"Don't think I haven't been participating silently for…a while."

"How long?" he inquired

"Isn't that my line?" she laughed at the penis joke she'd just made.

"You'll find out soon enough, and you won't be laughing. How long?"

"Well, you remember your evaluation."

"I do."

"Yeah…then." she bleated, too shy to say so with pride.

"No way! You mean you've liked me all this time too! And haven't said shit!?"

"I had to be professional, Sy! I didn't want to! Damn! You've gotta know how much I didn't want to be professional."

"I'll forgive ya, I guess, lil' lady."

"Merciful of you, sir!" she chuckled. "I'll need to go here soon. Won't be long now until my next one gets here."

"Tease me with a 'sir' then cut me off. Cruel."

"You like 'sir,' huh?" she whispered.

"I do. Yes…I…do."

"Noted. Well, until tomorrow."

"Don't forget to text me. I want you to give it to me too." he chuckled.

"Oh, you're bad."

"But, I'm real, real good sunshine." The deep rich promise in his voice did not go unnoticed.

"Bye Sy."

"Later Shane."

She hung up and texted him immediately. A selfie. He replied in kind. He seemed to be home on his couch, Aika by his side…he was not wearing a shirt…well…this day would be eternal.

Up Next: Chapter Five- Sensory Integration 1

[flowerpowell]

The Royal Holiday Romance (Liam x MC)

PART THREE

A/N: Good morning and welcome to the third part of this mess of a series that I randomly decided to write. It’s still cheesy and still Hallmarky. Nothing changed in that department. And we’re almost kinda halfway through. I hope you’ll like this part! Characters belong to Pixelberry.

Rating: G 

Tagging: @twinkleallnight​ @kingliam-rys​ @sfb123​ @iaminlovewithtrr​ @gardeningourmet​ @gkittylove99​ @texaskitten30​ @delightfullypinkglitter​ @kingliam2019​ @queen-arabella-of-cordonia​ @lodberg​ 

Victoria looked at herself in the mirror and sighed. She wasn’t sure if her little black dress was an appropriate attire for meeting the King. On the other hand, she truly believed that ‘less is more’ and her LBD was inspired by the fashion of Audrey Hepburn. If the King had a problem with Victoria’s love for simple outfits it wouldn’t be her problem. She doubted it’d be the case though; Hana insisted that the King was a true gentleman and one of the nicest people she’d ever met. Victoria was already excited to meet him. Besides, she’d never met anyone from royal family before and she was interested what they would be like. Her obsessions with fairytales definitely added to that interest.

“Ready?” Hana walked into Victoria’s room in a house the filming crew rented for all the actors.

“I think so. What do you think?” She did a little twirl and Hana chuckled.

“Beautiful. You look like an actress straight from the 50’s. Come on, our car is waiting for us!”

Victoria took a deep breath before walking out. It felt almost silly how excited she was but the inner child within her was screaming with joy at the prospect of going to an actual palace.

“Here goes nothing.” 

~~~~

“Ahhh! I’m so excited! Do you think Hana will like my squid suit?”

“Mhm.” Liam only nodded and Drake rolled his eyes.

“Why do I have to be here as well? I’m not a noble!” He asked, for the fifth time that hour.

“Because you want to support me?” Maxwell suggested and Drake shook his head.

“Try again.”

“This is so exciting! Thank you, Liam! You’re the best friend a guy could ask for,” Maxwell said, completely ignoring Drake.

“You’re welcome. My father liked lady Hana a lot and since her role in The Crown and the Flame he considered her a friend of the Crown. It’d be nice to have her back here.”

“And her friend Maxwell insisted on inviting,” Drake noticed.

“You’ll like her. Besides, Hana said nice things about her and Hana is never wrong.”

“Your obsession with Hana Lee is a bit concerning.”

“It’s not obsession, it’s an appreciation for her art. You’ll never understand it with an attitude like this, Drake.” Maxwell stuck out his tongue at him.

“Your Majesty.” Antonio, the King’s assistant, walked into the room. “The ladies have arrived. Shall I ask them to come here?”

“Yes, thank you.”

“Your Majesty!” Bastien called out from behind Liam. “The American Ambassador is on the line and wants to talk to you. He says it’s urgent.”

“Very well, then.” Liam nodded. “I’ll join you in a moment. Please excuse me,” Liam apologized and followed Bastien into his office. Truth be told, he was quite happy about that distraction. As much as he liked lady Hana, he wasn’t in a mood to socialize today. All he could think about was the mysterious Victoria. He wondered if she visited his secret spot again. He wanted nothing more than to go to that forest again and see her again. Maybe. If she was still Cordonia, that is.

“Liam, get yourself together,” he scolded himself in his head before returning to his duties.

~~~~

“The King had to answer a call but he’ll join us shortly. I’m so happy to see you both again,” Maxwell welcomed Hana and Victoria as Drake shook their hands.

“He’s always busy in the Christmas time,” Drake added.

“It’s okay,” Victoria tried to smile but she was too anxious to do that. Now that she was in the palace, it all felt real but still almost surreal.

“What an interesting suit, Maxwell,” Hana noticed.

“Thank you, m’lady.” Maxwell smiled and turned to Drake, sending him a quick, I-told-you-so look.

“Let’s go to the dining room. I’m sure you two must be hungry after working all day.”

Victoria only nodded, glancing one last time behind her to see if maybe the King had joined them. So far, there was no sight of him.

~~~~

Liam was sitting in his office with his eyes closed. If he had had any energy left before, now he had absolutely none. The ambassador talked to him for straight thirty minutes about his idea, which Liam didn’t fully understood. Something about the movie with Hana Lee and about the premiere of it, as well as some other details Liam simply hadn’t noted. He was tired, too tired to talk to anyone. Would Maxwell forgive him if he ditched the dinner?

“He’s probably too focused on Hana to notice I’m not here,” Liam said to himself before standing up and taking his coat. He needed fresh air first. He could join his friends later.

~~~~

It was already an hour since they came to the palace and there was still no King on the horizon. Victoria wondered if the Kingly duties were that absorbing or if he simply decided to skip the dinner. Hana and Maxwell were chatting and seemed not to notice someone was missing but Victoria kept glancing at the door from time to time. She talked a little with Drake who, as she learned, was half-American and was King’s best friend. He told her about his family’s ranch in Texas and about how different his life was in Cordonia. In return, Victoria told Drake about how she wanted to become a movie critic but became an actress instead.

“Y’know, it’s never too late to change your career path. Maybe you’re never really happy with your roles because you’re not doing something you really love?” Drake suggested when she confessed to him why she wasn’t so excited about the movie.

“I don’t know… It feels easier to be where I am rather than change my life drastically.”

“Maybe.” Drake nodded. “But I learned the hard way that we don’t grow if we stay in the same place. Don’t settle for less just because you’re comfortable or scared.”

Victoria chuckled. “That was deep.”

Drake smiled and motioned the alcohol on the table. “That’s whiskey talking. Or maybe my wife’s influence, I don’t know.”

“In this case, I’d like to thank whiskey and your wife for the advice. I’ll think about it.”

“Please do. I was in a similar spot before I met my wife. She completely changed me and made me realize all these things I just told you. And that being said,” Drake looked around the room, “I gotta go, I miss my wife.”

“Sure. Have a great night, Drake. And thank you for the pep talk!”

“At your service.” Drake smiled and said goodbye to Hana and Maxwell. Victoria sat alone for twenty minutes more before she finally decided to go home as well. The King wasn’t coming. He was probably very busy and Victoria wasn’t surprised he couldn’t make it.

“I think I’ll go as well. I’m a bit sleepy after today. You can stay,” Victoria added as she noticed Hana was getting up, too.

“Nonsense. I brought you here and besides, it is pretty late.”

“Hana, I know where to go. And I think I could use a walk. Please, stay here with Maxwell and don’t worry about me. We’ll see each other tomorrow morning anyway.”

“If you’re sure.” Hana hesitated and Victoria smiled reassuringly.

“I am.”

“Do you need a drive? I can ask one of our drivers to give you a lift,” Maxwell offered but she shook her head.

“I’ll walk, I want to get some fresh air before I’ll go to sleep. You two have fun, though!”

“Text me when you get to your room safely!” Hana called out after Victoria and she only nodded.

~~~~

Liam was wandering around the forest for over an hour, each minute feeling guilty for leaving his guests without their host. He truly believed they were better off without him as he was too tired to make a good impression on anyone.

It was already late when he decided to head home. He didn’t see Victoria, not that he was looking for her. He was that naïve to think he’d meet her again.

He was about twenty minutes from home when he noticed someone familiar. His heart began to race as he realized it was Victoria. As usual, she seemed to be lost in thought and didn’t see him. He admired how beautiful she looked for a moment before he decided to catch her attention.

“Victoria!” He called out and felt tingles when their eyes met. He watched as she walked up to him smiling from ear to ear and realized he was grinning like an idiot himself.

“Liam! What a nice surprise to meet you here!”

“Indeed it is. I… umm… was in the forest today and I missed you bumping into me.”

Victoria chuckled at his words. “I wanted to go there today but I had to be somewhere else.”

“Do you have any plans for tomorrow? There’s another spot I like and which I think you’ll like as well; besides, I just finished reading Little Mermaid and need to discuss it with an expert.”

“You read Little Mermaid?” Her eyes were sparkling with joy and Liam’s breath hitched.

“Of course. I’m always down to read a good thriller,” he joked causing her to burst out laughing. She quickly covered her mouth but Liam took notice of how adorable her laugh was.

“I’m free,” she replied. She had no scenes that day anyway and Hana would forgive her if she skipped one day of eating lunch together. Liam smiled at her words.

“Wonderful. Should we meet by the cave? What time would be the best for you?”

“Maybe it’d be easier if we had each other’s phone numbers?” Victoria suggested shyly. It was the first time ever she asked a man for his number. “This way we wouldn’t have to wait to bump into each other again and if something pops out we’d be able to contact one another.”

“I’m glad at least one of us is thinking straight,” Liam laughed. They exchanged their phone numbers and after chatting for a few moments, each of them went their own way, both of them thinking about the other one.

~~~~

“Good morning to you, Your Majesty who skipped your own dinner party. I hope the call was fruitful.”

Liam rolled his eyes at Drake’s sarcastic comment.

“The call was way too long and exhausting. I needed to go for a walk afterwards.” He bit his lip and Drake eyed him suspiciously.

“I know that look. You’re hiding something.”

“Not at all.”

“Mhm. Where were you yesterday and where are you going today?”

Liam sighed. “Drake, I really—”

“Be sorry that you didn’t come to dinner yesterday. We had so much fun! And Hana loved my suit!” Maxwell waltzed into the room, beaming.

“She said it was interesting,” Drake corrected but Maxwell ignored it.

“Where were you anyway?”

“I went for a walk and it took me longer than I thought. I’m happy to hear that you all had a great time,” Liam replied. They might have had a great time but he was sure he had even greater time. A certain movie critic had something to do with it. They shared a few messages since last night, mostly talking about movies and books. Liam found himself completely fascinated by this woman who was so passionate about cinema that it made him watch something for the first time since becoming the King.

“Maxwell had. He was talking to Hana all evening and left Hana’s friend out,” Drake noticed.

“She was talking to you!”

“Until I had to go back to Riley. Maxwell, you sucked as a host, face it.”

“Thank you, Drake for keeping her company though. Had I known she’d be sitting alone I’d have come sooner,” Liam said suddenly feeling guilty. He didn’t know this Tori but she was his guest and he felt bad for how Maxwell treated her.

“Okay, I’m sorry. I should’ve acted differently but I was just so excited to talk to Hana that I forgot about everything else. And Tori didn’t seem to mind. I told you she was cool,” Maxwell shrugged.

“We’ll talk about when I’ll come back,” Liam warned.

“Where are you going? Shouldn’t you have a meeting with my brother and Olivia today?”

“I rescheduled. I’m meeting someone.”

“Who?” Drake raised his eyebrows.

“Just… someone I met recently. I’ll tell you later.”

“Oooh, interesting!” Maxwell exclaimed. “Then I’ll tell you more about what I learned about Hana! Look, I even took pictures of us! I’ll use them in my book.” Maxwell showed Liam a few selfies from the day before. Most of them showed Maxwell grinning at the camera and Hana smiling slightly.

“Wait, stop,” Liam asked. “Can you go back to three pictures ago?”

“Umm, sure.”

Maxwell went back to the photo and Liam’s eyes went wide as he looked at it. He zoomed in on a person in the background, not believing his eyes.

“Victoria?!”

--------------------

[invisibleinorange]

Chapters: 11/? Fandom: Bridgerton Rating: T Warnings: Presumed Character Death Relationships: Colin Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington,  Eloise Bridgerton/Penelope Featherington(besties),  Bridgerton Family Dynamics, Simon Hastings/Daphne Bridgerton Characters: Colin Bridgerton,  Penelope Featherington, Eloise Bridgerton, Anthony Featherington,  Benedict Bridgerton,  Portia Featherington, Violet Bridgerton, Genevieve Delacroix Additional Tags:  Bridgerton, Polin Summary:  Unexpected bad news arrives for the Bridgerton Family (and friends) regarding Colin's travels. This will be a series that is set after "The Duke and I" or season one of the show. It is a companion piece to "Goodbyes".

Benedict’s head was spinning by the time he made it out of the dining room and into the solitude of the study with Anthony.  The last fifteen minutes or so of his life had been particularly perplexing. Everything in life had been a bit topsy-turvy of late though so he couldn’t be quite sure about anything.

“Did you do it?” he asked in an accusatory tone toward Anthony as soon as the door was shut and there was little chance of the women of the household eavesdropping on them.

“I’m the one who told you to let the girl breath and then come to realize she should take your offer,” Anthony told him, reaching for a decanter full of brandy.  He had a feeling it was going to be one of those nights where it was very much needed.

“I didn’t do it though,” Benedict confessed shaking his head. His hand rose to his head, fingers massaging at his temple. “If it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, then who?”

“Daphne?”  Anthony suggested after a moment’s thought. “She honestly could have been a bit clearer in her messaging though.  You know how our sister loves to interfere in matters that don’t necessarily concern her.”

“She did involve herself with the whole Marina Thompson matter,” Benedict rationalized. Daphne definitely didn’t know how to not get involved in things and she had read the letter from Colin.  She knew how close Penelope had always been to their family. It was a strong possibility that she’d been involved in this.  

That still left the question of what to do about it if she did.  

Everyone had already made up their mind that Benedict had been the one to make the purchase and it had made a bit of an impact.  Was it really such a terrible idea if they continued to think that he had made the purchase?

He didn’t quite feel right about taking credit that he didn’t deserve though. There was something about the whole situation that felt off and he couldn’t quite place it.

He wasn’t quite sure he could bear to crush Penelope Featherington by telling her that he had nothing to do with it; especially since she seemed to be warming up the idea of being his wife.

What sort of marriage would it be if it began on a lie?  The truth would eventually slip out. If it was Daphne, she’d inevitably see Penelope in the dress and say something that would reveal the secret.   If it was some other prospective suitor, they’d likely make themselves known eventually.

“How am I supposed to tell her that it wasn’t me?”  he asked, frustration clear in his voice.  “I’m damned regardless of the way it goes.”

“Maybe we figure out some more information before you do anything,” Anthony said honestly. “I mean, you distract and I’ll sneak into Penelope’s room and investigate.”

“How exactly do you suggest I distract?”  Benedict asked with a shrug knowing that this was probably the best scenario to go with.  

Anthony let out a bit of a laugh putting down a  now half-empty glass before moving around to a cabinet that was locked, unlocking it and pulling out a box and tossing it at his brother like it wasn’t some priceless family heirloom.

“Well if you’re going to have a fiancé, you should probably follow the dress with some jewelry,” he said with a smirk.

“I hate you,” Benedict said as he opened the box, admiring the ring that he knew was his to give.  Each child would get a certain number of heirlooms from the family to pass on. Anthony would get the lion’s share but as the second eldest, he had always had their late Ledger Grandmother’s ring.

“But you’re grateful for me for coming up with a scheme so impenetrable, they’ll be cooing over your display and not even notice that I’m off doing reconnaissance,” Anthony argued.

Benedict couldn’t begin to argue with that logic.

--

By the time that Benedict made it back to the rest of the family, they’d relocated to the music room.  His mother was working on her embroidery while his younger siblings were busy playing. He spotted Eloise and Penelope sitting on the couch, sharing a box of candies.  

He took a deep breath before he pushed past the threshold, unable to stop his brain from screaming that this was a terrible plan and that he ought to abort it immediately. Surely there was a better way to distract.  

His mother looked up from her embroidery prepared to ask about where her eldest had gotten off to but before the words could get out, Benedict was coughing as if he wanted the attention on himself.

It was very effective in gathering the attention of the room.

“I know that the excitement over the… package you received hasn’t quite worn off,” he said to Penelope after a long moment. “Perhaps it is ill-advised to push the matter further but I have something… that I think would look quite splendid with any dress.”

Violet seemed to perk up at that, especially as her son moved closer.

The stunt was working. He had a captive audience. Even Gregory and Hyacinth had paused their play to observe.

“I do not deserve all of this,” Penelope argued.  

“I’m going to give it to you anyways,” Benedict argued moving over, long hands moving over his box to open it. Inside was an immaculate gold ring with pearls and sapphires adorning it.

Penelope’s eyes widened at the sight.

This was certainly a statement and the sheer weight of it had everyone in the room breathlessly engaged.

“You want… me … to wear this?” she asked trying to wrap her mind around how much her life had changed in recent weeks.  As much as she would have liked to say that she’d kept an open mind about her future, she’d only ever seen two scenarios. It was Colin or nothing at all.

Benedict Bridgerton was in front of her now and it was very difficult to wrap her head around.  As weird as it was, it was admittedly nice to be doted on and to be part of the story instead of some side character to the bigger plot.  She wasn’t the girl who watched from the shadows anymore.  

“That’s generally the point,” Benedict said.  He made a gesture with his free hand to her own.

After a long moment of not moving, Eloise was the one to kick her shin to drive her to action.  Whatever misgivings Eloise had about her best friend marrying Benedict, she’d apparently gotten over it.

Penelope extended her hand after a long moment. It was as close to an out of body experience as she’d ever had.  She’d danced with all the Bridgerton men through the years and held their hands as part of it. She’d never quite given much thought to any of it aside from those moment with Colin.

Benedict’s hands were surprisingly warm but rough.  It was clear he used them regularly with his art. She could see hints of charcoal that hadn’t quite been washed away in the cracks.

Her gaze moved over his face as he moved her hand, carefully secured the ring to her fingers. It was a little bit of a tight fit but it did look nice there.   Just as quickly as he’d placed it there, she fully expected him to take his hand back.

She was surprised when he dipped down to kiss the top of her hand.

She wasn’t quite sure if she’d even fully agreed to proceeding with an engagement but she also wasn’t sure that she could stop this if she tried.

As he took stepped away again, she couldn’t help but see how thrilled Violet looked and after being taken in she would be hard-pressed to want to disappoint the woman.

Though any further thoughts were lost to the smell of smoke.

--

Anthony knew that it was vital he not be anywhere near the Music Room while Benedict put on his charm and distracted their family.  He honestly would have given his right arm to laugh at Benedict making a fool out of himself though.

It was relatively easy to sneak through the halls without anyone paying him much attention.  He stayed alert though, cautious to not draw the attention of any their staff. He didn’t need a maid ratting him out.

He considered himself lucky when he made it into the open guest room. It was neat and the bed appeared to be freshly made.  The abandoned box was still sitting on a table though and he moved to investigate, opening it first looking for clues.  It empty.  Clearly someone had saw it fit to move it to the wardrobe.

His next move was to look at the note.  The writing was definitely not a member of his household but he did recognize it.  He’d received many an invoice in that familiar handwriting and paid each and every one of them.  

He then moved to look at the box itself.  

It came from France.  It made sense with what he knew.  The Modiste had escaped to their weeks ago.  He only knew as much since Benedict had been enjoying her company prior to her departure and as the eldest Bridgerton he saw fit to know everything.

Another clue was in where it had gone.

It had gone to the Featherington’s first.

There as literally no one in the Ton who didn’t know that Penelope had taken up residence with them though.

It all seemed to make sense that it would have been the Modiste.

A new theory came to life in his head.

Women could be dangerous when jealous.  What if the rumors of something between Benedict and Penelope had reached France and the Modiste felt slighted?  What if the dress had been meant as a revenge on the poor girl?

Anthony had to protect her.

He stormed over the wardrobe, opening it with a slam and cursing when he realized how many dresses were in their and how little he remembered of what Penelope actually wore.

“Bloody Hell,” he muttered before grabbing them all, stuffing what he could into the box and proceeding down the hall and down the stairs to their backyard.  The only solution was to burn it all.

He threw them in a pile once a safe distance from the structure, using a matchbox in his pocket to ignite a light and toss it one it to start a small fire.

Penelope’s entire wardrobe was well engulfed before anyone bothered to notice what he was doing.

Benedict came first, followed by the rest of the motley crew.  There was something accusatory in his features.

“What in God’s name are you doing, Anthony?” he asked. Searching for a bucket or something that he might be able to retrieve water and smolder the flames.

It took a moment for everyone else to figure out what was being burnt exactly and when they did, there were a bunch of angry people to contend with.

“Have I done something to offend you?” Penelope couldn’t help but ask wondering if this was some backwards way of demanding her return to her own family.

“Hardly,” Anthony argued.

“Then why would you destroy all of her dresses?” Eloise asked, sounding like she could very nearly slap her own brother.

She wasn’t the only one though.

“Someone saw fit to mislead you,” he explained.  “The dress was meant for revenge and no one under my roof is going to fall prey to it.”

“It was just a dress. The most beautiful dress and – why would Benedict want to get revenge?”

Benedict had found some water and was tossing it on it though it didn’t completely put out the flames.  His head turned at the accusation.

Fucking Anthony.

“I didn’t send it,” he was forced to confess which resulted in all the anger that had been directed toward Anthony to turn on him.

“What do you mean, you didn’t send it?”  Penelope asked.

She didn’t stick around for the answer though. Instead she elbowed him hard in the stomach before storming back inside.

The impact definitely must have hurt because Benedict winced before mouthing ‘traitor’ at Anthony and attempting to chase after her in hopes of explaining.

Anthony wasn’t going to have it much better though since he was left with Eloise and his mother who both looked like they might kill him.

[bexterbex]

A Soul to Mend His Own | Ch. 49

Warning, PLEASE CHECK TAGS IF YOU SEE SOMETHING YOU DON’T WANT TO READ THEN DON’T READ. Tag lists are closed

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Will tag as I go along, Will update tags, Slow Burn, Influenced by Star Trek and other Sci-Fi themes, References to We Happy Few, Tons of References and quotes to George Orwells 1984 see if you can find them all, The First Order is the new Big Brother,  but who is really surprised, Blatant Nazi Symbolism, Interrogation Themes, Eventual Smut, Eventual Romance, Really just drawn out Slow Burn, Don’t repost without permission, Torture themes, Suggestive Themes, Execution themes, Disturbing Themes, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Verbal Abuse, Controlling Kylo Ren, Physical Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Kylo Ren is Not Nice, Kylo Ren Has Issues, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, Possessive Kylo Ren, A character shamelessly based on Zelda Spellman

A Kylo Ren x Modern! Reader in a soulmate au with some canon divergence. —————————————SLOWBURN————————————–

He is already the Supreme leader, searching the universe to find you, his Empress. Your name on his wrist has been the only constant in his life, while you have doubts about his existence and his acceptance of you. He isn’t in the database and why did the name Kylo Ren cover Ben Solo?

MASTERLIST

Chapter 49: Playing Dress Up

You were woken from your sleep, by a kiss on the lips. You opened your eyes to see Kylo dressed in his usual uniform. “What time is it?”

You hear him chuckle, “It is time for you to get up Kitten. Your ladies-in-waiting will be here at any moment. I have things I need to attend to. So this is goodbye until dinner,” said Kylo who then left down the hall and out of your chambers.

A few moments later the door opened again, Adlez and Olivia-Rose were followed by the lieutenant, Cardo, and Ushar. You went to meet them.

You heard a distorted wolf whistle, “Looking good Pet,” said Cardo ogling you. You immediately crossed your arms in a failed attempt to cover yourself. You could see the lieutenant turning red and averting his gaze. Olivia-Rose rushed into your dressing room getting you a robe.

Adlez let out a loud gasp and turned around to face him. “That is no way to speak to her.” You could hear the anger and authority in her voice. They were almost chest to chest as Cardo challenged her.

Luckily Ushar threw his arm in front of Cardo pushing him back. “I can speak to her how I want,” replied Cardo.

Once your robe was firmly secured around you, you approached the group. “No, she is the Supreme Leader’s match, you must treat her with respect,” said Adlez.

Cardo puffed up his chest once more, pressing against Ushar’s hold on him, but you spoke before he could respond. “Especially when the Supreme Leader has already reprimanded you for such in my presence once before. Shall I call him down,” you ask with a tilted head and cocked eyebrow. You were not going to be playing my horse is bigger than your horse this morning.

You heard Ushar release a distorted laugh, “Lady Ren has got a backbone Cardo, you better not test her. I like her too much.”

A smirk found its way to your face. You watched as both of them backed away, to go stand near the door. Adlez gave one last humph before turning around and assisting you in your dressing room and told the lieutenant to wait in the dining room.

Once the door shut behind you, Adlez quickly joined Olivia-Rose in getting you ready. “How did last night go m’lady,” asked Olivia-Rose.

“Better, he learned some new boundaries. Like keeping his hands above my clothes.”

Both of the women laughed at this, to which you smiled in response. Their hands expertly taking care of you, dressing you in a similar relaxed outfit as yesterday morning. This time your hair was done in a casual elegant style, very old Hollywood. You could tell that Adlez was an expert in this style.

“Now that he has learned this, you can use it to your advantage m’lady. Teasing him and using any additional privileges like a bartering chip,” said Adlez.

“I like that idea. Although I may occasionally extend my favors as I wish.”

“Obviously, the Dark Lord is a handsome man. If I were you it would be very hard to keep my hands to myself,” said Adlez, finishing putting on a necklace for you, while Olivia-Rose applied your makeup.

“I have really tried to refrain from touching him anywhere else but his head. I might lose my battle with him as it would be too much for my brain to handle, and we might cross my imaginary boundary,” you replied. “Also, why did he choose you for me, if he was going to know that you would be helping me mold him into my will?”

Adlez let out a laugh, “He chose me because of my experience, my ex-husband was a diplomat on Corellia. Unfortunately, because the First Order took over his and my position were cut, and I no longer needed to be married to him. We are better off not married anyway. And because of this position, I now have access to a bunch of eligible bachelors onboard,” she gave you a wink. You saw Olivia-Rose blush at this too.

“I wouldn’t know about the selection you have available, just promise me you two won’t get into too much trouble. I already have my hands full with the Supreme Leader.”

Both of them laughed at that. You all got up to go have breakfast, the lieutenant was waiting in the dining room for you as were Cardo and Ushar.

“Would anyone like anything while I order? I know to get you a coffee lieutenant.”  You looked around to everyone.

“Coffee for both of us m’lady,” said Olivia-Rose referring to Adlez. Both Cardo and Ushar shook their heads.

While waiting for your food to arrive Ushar asked, “So what princess lessons are on the agenda today?” He turned his helmeted gaze to your lieutenant. Who swallowed back a lump of fear before responding.

“Lady Ren is free until her lessons after lunch. After they are finished she has dinner with the Supreme Leader,” replied Mitaka.

“So the princess has a free morning, what shall she do with it,” teased Cardo. You saw Ushar hit him again.

Adlez looked at you and said, “If you don’t mind a suggestion m’lady, Olivia-Rose and I would love to spend the morning styling you in various ways for different occasions. A test really to see what you like and what you don’t.”

You heard a distorted snicker come from Cardo, who turned to Ushar, “They are going to play dress up.”

You grew your backbone once more, “If you are going to be rude Cardo then there is no need for you to be here. You can safely guard me from someplace else if it is too difficult for you.”

You watched him stand and clench his fists before Ushar hissed his name and told him to get out. Ushar muttered apologies to you and the others before stepping out of the dining room himself.

You finished your breakfast with some idle chatter with everyone. Not really commenting on this or that. Preferring to eat without much distraction. Once you were finished you saw Olivia-Rose start to take the dishes into the kitchen and you told her to stop, that the droid would take care of it. She was just as out of place as you once were, not knowing how things fully worked.

You entered the dressing room and dismissed the lieutenant until your lesson. Both women seemed to be very happy changing your outfits and accessories and your hair and makeup. Taking you through this scenario and that one with outfit changes. Deciding what works together and what doesn’t. Olivia-Rose did well as she was there when you bought most everything.

“Now we should discuss your routine. I think it would be best for you to take baths every other day, to maintain healthy skin. We should also get a full regime of face masks in the works to keep your skin looking as young as possible,” said Adlez. You trusted her opinions on this, as her skin looked flawless. “We should also get a regular routine of body hair removal and nail care. I will work something out with the lieutenant to always have it in your schedule one way or another. Not taking care of yourself is one of the quickest ways for a man to lose interest. And it is in our best interest to keep the Dark Lord interested in you.”

You did take care of yourself but not to the degree that Adlez was speaking. It sounded like a lot of upkeep and work. But you trusted her, after all, she was right, you needed to keep Kylo interested in you, even though he had shown no real example of not doing so something in your gut told you that something was coming.

“I was wondering if we should take lunch ‘outside’? I would love to feel the sun on my face,” you asked them both.

“Of course m’lady, just let me check to make sure the simulated sun doesn’t give off any UVA UVB rays. Otherwise, we will have to lather your skin in sunscreen. The sun is aging’s best friend and one of your worst enemies,” said Adlez. She then left the dressing room to go check. She came back and informed you that it was all clear.

You three went to the patio and enjoyed the simulated sun during your lunch. This is where both the lieutenant and general found you when it was time to begin your lessons again. You all headed upstairs to the large sitting area once more.

Ch. 14 Part 1: Formal Dinners (para. 1-36)

Ch. 14 Part 2: Formal Dinners (para. 37-80)

Ch. 14 Part 3: Formal Dinners (para. 81-116)

Ch. 14 Part 4: Formal Dinners (para. 117-152)

Ch. 14 Part 5: Formal Dinners (para. 153-end)

Ch. 15: Dinner-Giving with Limited Equipment

Ch. 16: Luncheons, Breakfasts and Suppers

Ch. 17 Part 1: Balls and Dances (para. 1-53)

Ch. 17 Part 2: Balls and Dances (para. 54-end)

Ch. 18: The Debutante

“We will be throwing a formal dinner in a few days with some of the leaders of some First Order planets. You and the Supreme Leader are expected to be in attendance. I will also be there. This is your official debut as Lady Ren, so it will be very important. The Supreme Leader has left it in our hands to get you ready,” said Hux.

You were nervous. You were going to be at a formal dinner, with lots of people you didn’t know, who would be expecting you to be a lady when you weren’t one. This was something that you hoped Kylo would spare you from or something that he would have at least had the courtesy of telling you himself.

You were immensely grateful for Adlez and Olivia-Rose now. They would help you prepare yourself so you didn’t look like an idiot.

“Will I have lessons as to who these leaders are? And to what the rest of the galaxy is,” you ask fiddling with your hands.

“Of course m’lady, it is not my intention to allow you to attend unprepared. It is also the Supreme Leader’s wish for you to be as prepared as I can get you. You will not be alone at the dinner he and I will be there along with other First Order High Command members,” consoled Hux.

“Will Pryde be there?”

“Yes, m’lady, unfortunately, he will be, some of these leaders are the ones I was telling you about. Ones that were Empire sympathizers who like him. But this will be a good time to showcase yourself as someone they can trust. Do not worry, the Supreme Leader will be the whole time with you.” You could see the earnestness in his face. It calmed your nerves a bit.

“When will this formal dinner take place?”

“In a week, seven cycles time. We will be on the other side of the galaxy then near Arkanis. And it will take place here on board the ship, so you will be perfectly safe.” His reassurance did help, as did the date of the dinner. Although you knew that the anticipation may kill you. You were nervous, to say the least.

“Thank you for informing me general, is that all for today?”

“Yes, m’lady. I believe it is now time for you to prepare for dinner.” And with that, both he and the lieutenant left.

You and the girls made your way downstairs to your dressing room. They got out another simple dress and started working on another simple but elegant hairstyle, one that you had worked on earlier that day.

“Do not worry m’lady, we will have you prepared for that dinner, none of those old men will know what hit them,” said Olivia-Rose, voicing herself confidently for the first time.

“Exactly, we will make you the belle of the ball as they say. No one will be able to resist your charm, and if we do everything right, so will the Dark Lord,” said Adlez.

“I know, but I would have preferred him telling me this news versus the general. After all, I am his match, and this is my debut,” you said voicing your displeasure at the situation.

“Well then m’lady you will just have to show the Dark Lord that,” said Adlez while she changed the initial lipstick she was going to hand you. She then picked out a more alluring perfume for you to wear along with a pair of heels. “This will help show him just that. Keep him at arm's-length and he will be eating out of the palm of your hands in no time.”

You liked her thinking a lot. She was right; you needed to show him how it displeased you to have others tell you things that he could have easily told you himself. You were now playing his game, and he did not hold all the cards, but neither did you. But you did have a few aces up your sleeve and now was the time to play one.