#anyway did you know i passed out for two days yesterday no joke

[daily-smallishbeans]

140- he did some baaaaad things

[mads-hemmo]

It’s Nice to Have a Friend - Jschlatt

Part 2

Reader has been lonely their whole life. They have never been in a relationship. They don’t understand why no one will love them but their best friend, Schlatt has always been in love with them.

Masterlist

Schlatt remembers the day he met you like it was yesterday. He started at a middle school away from most of the friends he had in elementary school. This meant that he didn’t have any friends, but he did his best to not let it affect him. One day at lunch time, he sat by himself as he had for the past two weeks. Then out of nowhere, this kid came and sat by him. “Hi I’m (Y/N), you’re Jonathon right?” You had asked.

He just nods. He had seen you in class before. He was really curious as to why you were sitting by him while everyone else had left him alone.

“Cool. Nice shirt,” you tell him. He looks down at the Mario Kart shirt his mom had bought him from Target.

“Thanks,” he said. “Do you play?”

“Yeah, I play on the Wii and my DSi. I play as Peach. Not because she’s a girl, but because she’s cool. Also my little brother has taken over Yoshi.”

From that moment, you and Schlatt became best friends. You were even the one who came up with the nickname, Schlatt. His nicknames for you changed over the years but it ultimately landed on Bub/Bubba and Toots. The latter started as a joke but it stuck.

Schlatt has been with you for every phase of your teenage life: the one direction phase that he thinks never went away, your “emo” phase, your trying to fit in phase, and your party college phase. While many people found you to be completely ridiculous and sometimes over the top, Schlatt stuck by your side. He knew they didn’t get to see the real you. The one who likes playing video games and watching shitty musicals.

You were also with him through everything. You were there when he started making videos and you became his first subscriber. Neither of you imagined that he would blow up the way he did. When he started streaming on Twitch, the both of you knew something big was about to happen especially after SMPlive. He always talked to you first to flesh out ideas on the Dream SMP during his presidential reign.

Schlatt was always appreciative of how supportive you were with everything he did. He loved having someone who wasn’t attached to anything online. Someone who didn’t care how much money he made or how famous he got. Maybe that’s why he started developing feelings for you.

It wasn't always a thing. Perhaps the feelings were always there, but he hadn’t really noticed them until a few years ago. Back in High School, when you complained about being single, he had wondered why no one wanted to be with you. You were real, funny, and attractive. But he always made sure to assure you that everyone you went to school with sucked and were all fucking stupid anyways.

The feelings really started making themself evident when he moved to Austin. He had surrounded himself with just content creators and was working all the time. When he was extra stressed, Schlatt would call you on Discord. No matter what you were doing, you stopped everything to simply talk and play games with him.

“Don’t you have midterms?” he would ask while you created a house on Minecraft.

“Yeah, but they can wait. I feel confident that I’ll pass them. If I don’t, I’ll just sell pictures of my feet until I can afford to start again,” you tell him.

He smiles to himself. Something about how normal you are makes his heart skip a beat. You could have brought up the money he makes but no you resorted to talking about selling pictures of your feet. “Your feet are ugly. Don’t think they would make you much profit.”

Conversations like these made him realize that he had to leave the hell hole of Austin and move back to New York. Back to you. Now he felt happy again getting to spend as much time with you as possible.

His crush was so embarrassing that all his online friends know about you. They also make a point to bring it up when he’s not filming. “How’s your partner, Schlatt?” Astro asks, before they start filing for Sleep Deprived.

“They aren’t my partner,” Schlatt says.

“Not yet,” Mika adds.

Schlatt sighs. He knows you’ll never feel the same way about him that he feels for you. He’s not the Jonathan you want. He’s not Jonathan Groff or Jonathan Bailey. He’s just Schlatt, your best friend, nothing else.

Schlatt decides to ignore his feelings and just play Stardew Valley. While playing, he sees that you sent him a snap. It’s just a picture of you holding a Rammie plushie with the caption, “my new best friend because mine is busy working like a loser.”

He smiles like a loser at his phone and takes a screenshot. It takes everything in him to not tell you how cute you are. Instead he sends a photo of his forehead with a simple, “fuck you”.

Schlatt’s attention goes back to the screen. “Who the fuck stole my Persian Rugs?” he asks, when his character wakes up.

After a few hours of recording, he decides to call you on Discord. You answer quickly. “Sup Fucker?” You say over the call. “You done working?”

“Yeah I just finished filming for Sleep Deprived. What are you up to?” Schlatt asks, happy to hear your voice.

“Currently playing Balatro then I’m going to work on crocheting a blanket. I’m also watching New Girl.”

He admired how talented you were. Always working on something new. He loved how creative you were in everything you did. “What watch of New Girl is this now?”

“I think 6, maybe 7. I’ve lost count. With every watch, you can tell how obvious that Jess and Nick are end game. Nick is so in love and Jess is oblivious. It’s hilarious. How could anyone be that stupid?” You laugh.

Schlatt lets out a choked laugh. “Yeah it’s crazy.”

“If I were to fancast Chuckle Sandwich for New Girl. Tucker is Winston because duh, Charlie is Coach since he was there at the beginning and shows up every now and then, Ted is Schidmt, and you’re Nick.”

“Oh is that so? Who’s Jess then?”

“Obviously I’m not a part of the crew, but probably me since she’s my spirit animal,” you tell him.

“That’s interesting,” he says, wondering if you noticed what you said. It’s obvious you didn’t make a connection.

“Oh did you see that Grace is engaged and Molly is pregnant?” You change the subject, not even meaning to.

“No I didn’t. I don’t follow anyone from high school anymore and I couldn’t care less.”

“That’s fair, but how do these bitches find their soulmate and make babies? It’s so ugh!”

“They will probably get a divorce in three years and I doubt the guys they are with are much better than them,” he says. He wishes you wouldn’t worry about people that don’t matter to either of you.

“Yeah, you’re probably right. Did I tell you about my new friend, Paige from work?”

“No I don’t think you did. What about her?” He is confused why you are bringing up some random girl. He really hopes she’s not a new crush of yours. He couldn’t handle you crushing on a person you know.

“I think you should get to know her. I think the two of you would really hit it off. She played softball and she is just overall cool. I can give you her number.”

It’s worse than he thought. You weren’t into her, you thought he would be. This was a recurring thing that Schlatt despised every time it happens. He doesn’t want to go on a date with some random girl. He wants you, but he can’t let you know that. “Maybe. I’m still not really wanting to date. I want to focus on my career and the new projects I’m working on,” Schlatt tells you. It’s not a complete lie, but it’s not the complete truth either. If he was going on a date with you, it’d be a different story.

“Oh okay. I told her you were a busy guy. She just sounded like someone you’d be into.”

He can tell he made you slightly upset and that’s his least favorite thing to do. “Thank you for thinking of me, Bub,” he tells you. “What are your plans tonight?”

“I’m not sure yet. Just crafting probably. Did you have something in mind?” You ask.

He didn’t have any plans, but he wanted to spend time with you. Being away from you, made him want to hang out with you as much as possible. Even if it was as simple as watching a movie or playing with the cats. He sometimes imagines the two of you living together. Getting to spend as much time as possible doing the most mundane things would make him so happy.

“I can order some sushi and we can do that coloring thing you told me about,” he says, hoping you’d be down to come over.

“Sure. When should I come by? Do I need to bring my pajamas?” You ask.

“Uh sure if you want to stay over. We both know you’ll be in leggings or shorts though, so you might not need them.”

“Good point. If anything I’ll steal some of your clothes,” you tell him, nonchalantly.

Schlatt feels a lump in his throat thinking of how big his clothes would be on you. You’d probably suffocate in them, but he’s sure you’d look damn cute. “Yeah, sure,” He stammers out. “I’m done working so come by whenever.”

“Alright see you soon.” You hang up before he can say anything else.

Schlatt starts feeling giddy like a little girl waiting for your arrival. He starts picking up what he can. He checks himself out in the mirror, fluffing up his hair a bit. He applies a little bit of cologne. When he goes back to the living room, he sees Jambo judging him. “I’m a fucking disaster. Aren’t I?”

Jambo just meows in agreement. Schlatt sighs, he wonders how long he can unrequitely love you. He’s sure it’s going to kill him before he confesses. He knows that it will be best to just wallow in his self pity instead of fucking up your friendship.

A doorbell ringing interrupts him. He trips on his way to opening the door. When he opens it, he expects to see your pretty face, but that’s not who’s on the other side. “Surprise,” Ted says on the other side of the door.

Schlatt just stares at him in disbelief. He sees you walk behind them. “Am I interrupting something?” You ask.

“The infamous (Y/N), I’ve heard so much about you!”

Schlatt knew in that moment that he was royally fucked.

A/N: another late night post! But I can’t stop writing. I’m going to be so sad next week when I have to go back to work. Reader is general neutral, but I may add some fem! stuff. Also the ending just popped in my brain last minute! Hope you all enjoy!! Thanks for reading!!

[beegomess]

Dark Paradise | Theodore Nott

Reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated 🫶🏼

01. Invisible Flirts

The music was loud, and there was a lot of noise from some students around Matthew, who was trying to down an entire bottle of Firewhisky. Pansy and Y/N had drinks in hand when they threw themselves onto the dark couch next to Draco and Blaise.

Draco and Zabini were sharing a joint when the blond offered it to the sister sitting next to Pansy.

— You’re a terrible brother, you know that? — Y/N had a smile as she reached out to take it between her fingers and took a drag.

— Imagine if our father saw you now? — Everyone burst into laughter; Draco and Blaise couldn’t stop laughing, considering their eyes were already extremely red.

— What are you guys laughing so much about? — Nott approached and sat in an armchair in front of his friends.

— You missed the big joke Draco told about what it would be like if your father saw them now. — Pansy said, emphasizing that it wasn’t really funny, just that they were very high. — Where have you been anyway? I haven’t seen you all night. — Parkinson hinted.

— Around. — Nott answered simply and noticed the attention he was getting from Y/N’s eyes while she took another drag of her cigarette. Theodore didn’t look away from Y/N, which would normally make her look away from him, but in her current state, embarrassment was not an issue. However, both their faces were expressionless, revealing nothing about each other.

Y/N only looked away when she saw Astoria Greengrass, a year younger than Daphne, making out with Adrian Pucey in the middle of the party. Daphne walked past the two and made a face of disgust, making Pansy and Y/N laugh. Pansy glanced to see that Theodore still hadn’t looked away from Y/N.

— What’s her plan this time? — Pansy asked Daphne, who was sitting on the coffee table between the sofas, turning her back to Theodore.

— According to her, the plan is to hook up with someone from Draco’s social circle and get closer to Y/N. — Daphne rolled her eyes as she spoke, and everyone began to pay attention, letting out small laughs.

— Is she really getting close to me just out of interest? — Y/N put her right hand on her chest, pretending to be offended by the revelation.

— Yes, but she always talks about how she thinks you’re pretty and that she wanted to be friends with you too. — Daphne said with irony, somewhat coldly as she laughed at her sister.

— Oh Merlin, she thinks like she’s five years old. — Theodore added, drawing everyone’s attention to him quickly.

— Well, I’m sure you didn’t mention that Pucey was once one of the lucky ones Y/N got physically involved with. — Pansy said, expecting a response from Daphne.

— Believe me, I did. — Y/N looked incredulous. — That’s why he was the chosen one for the night. — The three girls burst into laughter.

— Good to know you’re passing along things about my private life. — Y/N said playfully, as she didn’t really mind the situation.

However, Theodore, who was paying more attention to the conversation, just drank his drink, without laughing or reacting to it. He was only thinking about how Y/N managed to silence Adrian so he wouldn’t spread to everyone that he was with the most popular and desired girl at Hogwarts.

[...]

At breakfast, all the friends had a clear expression of exhaustion from the previous night. It was certainly not a good idea to have parties before a day of classes.

— Good morning. — Astoria approached the group cheerfully but didn’t receive the same enthusiasm.

— Shh, no need to shout, Greengrass. — Blaise had his eyes squinted due to the light in the Great Hall. He was exaggerating; the girl spoke normally, but he seemed too sensitive.

— Sorry. — She shrugged. — I just thought I’d invite you to go dress shopping tomorrow for the winter ball next week. — Y/N, Pansy, and Daphne exchanged glances, remembering the girl's plan to get closer to them, even though she already had friends in her year. — Adrian invited me yesterday to go with him, and I accepted.

— Now, if he remembers that, that’s another thing. — Matthew, who was next to Y/N, spoke quietly and laughed. He immediately received an elbow from Y/N.

— Ouch!

— Sorry, but my mother already sent me a dress for the ball. — Y/N said gently.

— Oh, and who are you going with? — The girl seemed to no longer care about the description. Everyone in the hall fell silent, waiting for Draco’s sister’s answer. Y/N felt the pressure; she knew that if she said she was going alone, her week would be full of boys chasing her, and under the pressure of the moment, she needed to think quickly.

— I’m going with Theodore, aren’t I, Theodore? — Her answer echoing throughout the hall made the eyes widen. Nott looked up, somewhat surprised, until she nudged his leg from under the table, making him clear his throat with the contact.

— Yes... Yes, we’re going together. — All the friends looked at them in confusion. Draco had his eyebrows furrowed; they had never been close, and now they were going to the ball together?

— Enough with the interrogation! — Daphne said, giving her sister a fierce look. — Don’t you have a class now?

Everyone continued with breakfast after the younger Greengrass left. Pansy wouldn’t have the next class with Y/N but made a mental note to ask her about this news. She wondered if something was going on between them; she wouldn’t be surprised. Y/N always knew how to hide her affairs very well.

Y/N, however, tried to sit next to Theodore in Potions class, but when she arrived, there was already a Hufflepuff sitting next to him. Y/N mentally cursed herself for not hurrying at breakfast. Theodore was very handsome and never lacked options for girls, and now, close to the ball, all of them were throwing themselves at him, even though they had heard minutes ago about him being Y/N Malfoy’s date.

The girl sat at the table behind him and decided to pass him a folded note while everyone began taking notes from the board.

"Thanks for this morning; if I told the truth, I wouldn’t be at peace this week. I hope I haven’t ruined any of your invitations to other girls; in fact, I’ll see someone else to go with me today, I promise."

Theodore took the note and smiled slightly as he read, the girl next to him seemed to try to stretch to read his reply.

"Don’t worry, I didn’t have anyone in mind to bring either. We can go together if you want..."

Y/N took the folded piece of parchment from her side of the table and smiled as well at the reply.

"Although I don’t believe that Theodore Nott, so acclaimed among the girls, doesn’t have any prospects, I accept to go with you."

And again, the few words made him smile, responding with one last thing.

"I’m pleased to know about my fame among you."

Y/N laughed at the response, drawing attention in the silent room.

— Am I interrupting something, Miss Malfoy? — Snape looked coldly at her, making her immediately stop smiling.

— Oh, no. Sorry, professor. — And then, quickly, he went back to teaching.

Throughout the rest of the day, Y/N felt strange. His gaze was still extremely indecipherable to her, but it attracted her more and more. In recent months, their glances seemed to have increased in frequency. Sometimes, they would catch each other looking. Y/N felt Nott observing her while she read in the common room late at night. It was her ritual to always read a bit when the common room was empty; she liked to enjoy the silence, but when Theodore noticed the habit, he started to "accidentally" find her there day after day.

"If I didn’t know you, I’d say you were following me." Y/N said, smiling at him one night. Theodore could say it was the first time he felt truly nervous around a girl, but he maintained his composure and just smiled, staying there in silence while watching her hands turn the pages.

— And what’s this about you going to the ball with Nott? — Pansy asked, putting on a pair of socks before getting into bed.

— Good point, Pans. — Daphne turned from the vanity where she was applying products to her face. — So, Y/N?

— It was just to throw off the other boys. — She said without taking her eyes off the book.

— So, you’re not really going with him? — Pansy insisted.

— I am; we’re short on dates and decided to leave it that way. — Y/N continued scanning the words on the page.

— You and Nott? Short on dates for a ball? — Y/N nodded, pretending indifference. — Hmm, right, I see. — Pansy said with a mischievous smile, hinting at something that Y/N chose to ignore, as Parkinson often did this just by talking to another boy.

_______________________________

xoxo, bee🫶🏼✨ next chapter>>>

[mulletpermsicantlookaway]

The Jockification of Jeremy, Part 2: Jeremy in Love

(For Part 1 and the earlier stories this is a sequel to, see the earlier posts.)

The next day when I got up, I was already looking forward to wrestling practice. I had to go to school in the same shorts from yesterday, though, because nothing in my closet really seemed to fit me anymore, which was odd. I had kind of forgotten about all of Chase’s messages from the night before. In any case, I wasn’t going to go to a bunch of trouble trying to track him down. It’s not as if I could be seen spending all my time hanging out with a geek. What would the bros say? But Chase found me by my locker before lunch.

He came up to me and said, “What the hell happened to you? I almost didn’t recognize you with that outfit – and that haircut. Why’d you cut it so short? And where have you been? I thought someone had stolen your phone or something. You didn’t answer any of my texts, except for one message that didn’t even sound like you.”

“Chill out, bro, I’m fine. I was just busy. After basketball practice, I went over to Derek’s to watch the game with some of the bros; I told you that. And when I got home, I was so wiped out I almost fell asleep in my clothes.”

“You’re not making any sense, Jeremy. Derek? From the football team? Watching the game? Since when do you hang out with Derek? Or watch games? And since when are you on the basketball team?”

“Since practices started up. I talked to Coach Sanders yesterday. It’s fucking awesome, bro. You should think about joining. I’m sure I could talk to the coach about giving you a tryout.”

“Uh, I don’t think I’m exactly cut out for basketball, and I’m not interested, anyway. And I’m surprised you are. What is wrong with you, Jeremy? I mean, lately you’ve been starting to look like a jock. Now you’re talking like one, too, and hanging out with them, and wearing basketball shorts to school. At least your clothes fit now, but – you look different. Bigger. And taller. What the hell happened to you? Did you turn into a jock overnight? Where were you all day yesterday, anyway?”

“Bro, I already told you. I just went down to talk to the coach, and then I went to practice. Then I did some lifting and went over to Derek’s. Nothing to get your panties in a bunch over.”

“My panties are not in a bunch, you dumbass, and I’m not your bro. Seriously, did they do something to you? That’s it, isn’t it? I didn’t see it before, but somehow they turned you into one of them, didn’t they?

“Dude, do you realize how ridiculous that sounds? Look, I realize I’ve been going through some changes recently, but this is what I want, and I’m sorry you’re not okay with that.”

Just then, Derek happened to pass by. I gave him a fist bump and said, “Hey, Derek, bro, thanks so much for having me over last night. That game was fucking epic, man!” Derek and I talked for a minute. Chase stared at us the whole time. Derek ignored him completely.

As soon as Derek had left, Chase said, “You’re not kidding. You really are hanging out with that blond Cro-Magnon! Now I know something’s wrong.”

“What’s wrong with Derek, bro? He’s a nice guy.”

“To other jocks, maybe, but not to me. You really have turned into one of them, haven’t you? Jeremy, you’ve got to listen to me: this isn’t you. Somehow they did something to you. You’re totally acting like a dumb jock now!”

“Bro, I told you I’m fine.”

“If you’re fine, what’s two plus four?”

“Bro, those are, like, two different numbers,” I chuckled, but Chase didn’t laugh. “Okay, sorry, that was a dumb joke. I do know how to add. But seriously, what’s wrong with you, Chase?”

“What’s wrong with me is that I’m apparently the only one of us that can see that you changed overnight, and it doesn’t make sense.”

“Look, bro, I get that I’ve been changing, but I just wish you could be okay with it. I mean, we’re friends, aren’t we, bro?”

Chase stood there a minute, fuming, and then he said, “Okay, Jeremy, I give up. I still think something happened to you, but I guess there’s nothing I can do about it; at least, I can’t think of anything. I’m sorry, Jeremy, but could you just leave me alone, at least for now, okay? You’re my best friend, and you used to be, well, you used to be so cute, but I can’t stand looking at you and seeing some knuckle-dragging neanderthal. And quit calling me ‘Bro’. It makes you sound like a douche. I’m sorry. Please, just leave me alone.” And then he took off.

I let him go, but it honestly pissed me off that things were going so well for me and he couldn’t be okay with it. I mean, I try to be nice to the little dude, and he throws it back in my face, calling me a neanderthal! I seriously wanted to mop the floor with the little shit. I thought about it the rest of the day in class. I knew I should just let it go; I had plenty of bros to hang out with, and I didn’t need Chase. But I found myself missing him. I hadn’t been able to admit it to myself before, but I think I’d been in love with Chase for a long time. Now that I had finally figured that out, he didn’t want to have anything to do with me, and I didn’t know how to make things right. Suddenly I got an idea: I could talk over my problem with the coach. I was sure he could help. Today I had wrestling, not basketball, but I felt I knew Coach Sanders better than I did the wrestling coach. I should be able to catch him in his office before I had to go to practice.

When I got downstairs by the locker rooms after school, Coach Sanders’s door was open, and he was in his office. I knocked on the door.

“Jeremy!” he said. “Come in, big guy. Boy are you getting tall! But you look like you just lost your best friend. What seems to be the trouble? Girl trouble? Oh, I’m sorry, Jeremy; in your case it’d be boy trouble, wouldn’t it?”

“Yeah, Coach, you nailed it. I guess it is boy trouble. I have lost my best friend, I think. He and I have been friends since, like, grade school. But now he really seems to have a problem with me going out for sports and hanging out with my bros. And I don’t get what his problem is, but I feel bad, because we’ve been friends for so long. I know he’s just a skinny little dude, but I’ve always, you know, liked him, and I thought he, you know, maybe liked me, too. And I thought it would be really cool if he could, you know, join the team, and then we could hang out more together. But when I suggested he try out for basketball, he just about flipped his lid. He called me a dumb jock, and now he won’t even talk to me.”

“Jeremy, one of the things that happens to young men your age is that you’re all going through huge changes, but you don’t all change at the same time or the same pace, even if you’re the same age. Every guy’s body is different, you know. It’s like that for you and Chase right now. You’ve just gone through some rapid changes, and that’s something normal for guys your age. Your friend Chase isn’t changing the same way or at the same time, so he’s having a hard time dealing with you changing so quickly. And, realistically, Jeremy, you two may both change in such different ways that you won’t be able to be friends anymore. That happens a lot to guys your age. But then again, Chase might suddenly start changing in ways that will bring you two closer. You have to understand, Jeremy, that as you’ve changed physically, your interests have changed as well, but your friend Chase is still in the same place he was before. If he starts catching up to you, you may find you two have a lot more in common, even though right now you’re both in different stages of development.”

“That makes so much sense, Coach. Thank you, I really couldn’t figure out what the problem was. It’s as if he’s still twelve years old and wants to do little kid stuff, but I’ve grown, and I’m not interested in little kid stuff anymore.”

“It’s exactly like that, Jeremy. Maybe you two already went through something like this when you were both twelve years old and starting to become teenagers.”

“Yeah, I suppose we kind of did have some struggles back then, but not this serious. Thanks so much for helping me, Coach. I feel a lot better. It’d be so cool, though, if you could talk him into going out for basketball or wrestling or something. I mean, I wasn’t really interested in going out for any sports until after you talked to me. I just wish Chase, could, you know, feel how awesome it is to be a jock and hang out with your bros. I’m sure you could persuade him the same way you did me.”

Coach Sanders got up from his desk then and closed the door. “We should maybe have a little privacy,” he said. “I appreciate your confidence in me, Jeremy. Maybe I could persuade him the way I did you. I can try, but I can tell you from where I sit that peer pressure is a lot more persuasive to guys your age than anything their teachers or coaches tell them. Don’t underrate your friendship, even if Chase seems mad at you right now. If he sees how happy you are, he might come around to your way of thinking. And even if he doesn’t, I might still be able to help you.”

He rummaged in one of his desk drawers, got out a key, and unlocked one of the filing cabinets. He took some object out of one of the bottom drawers and sat back down at his desk, still holding whatever the object was in his hand.

“Jeremy, do you remember me telling you about how our former football coach had developed some amazing conditioning programs for helping young men like you reach their full potential?”

“Yes, Coach, I do. You had me watch one of his videos. It was great. I don’t totally understand what it was all about, but I liked it a lot.”

“Well, Jeremy, that was one the materials that we managed to save when he left. We don’t, unfortunately, still have everything he developed. That video is very effective, and I’m happy to share it with any young man that can benefit from it. What I’m holding in my hand right now is another one of his materials. It works in a different way, but it’s extremely effective. And it’s very special, because we unfortunately have only a very few of these left.”

He put the object he was holding on his desk. It appeared to be some kind of athletic cup, the kind you might wear with a jockstrap. The cup was sealed in a plastic bag with a tear-off top. It was unusual looking for an athletic cup, however. It was quite large, and it appeared to be made of some kind of carbon-fiber or other high-tech material, orange and black and grey.

“This, Jeremy, isn’t an ordinary athletic cup. It’s a conditioning device that can help young men like Chase reach their true potential as athletes. If you want, and if I can trust you to not talk about this with anyone else, I will give it to you. Talk to your friend again. Don’t mention anything about this. It’s possible you won’t need it. But if Chase still doesn’t see the advantages of becoming more like you, this will help him.  And if you don’t feel comfortable giving this to him yourself, there are students on the football team that have experience with these devices; just let me know, and I could have one of them help.”

I stared at the cup, wondering exactly what it did and how it worked. The idea of watching Chase develop into a jock enticed me, but I was missing something. “Coach, there’s one thing I don’t understand. Why would Chase need this when I didn’t? Wouldn’t the video help him?”

“It would, Jeremy, but it likely would not be enough to help him to reach your level of development. The video you refer to primarily conditions the mind to develop the routines needed to be an effective athlete. It helped you, for example, learn practice and workout routines that otherwise would have required weeks of drilling. And those mental routines help to condition you physically, which is critical to an athlete. However, physical conditioning can take considerable time, and the athlete has to be highly motivated in order to succeed. Even then, many young men, no matter how motivated they are, are at a genetic disadvantage and are just not capable of the physical development needed. That, Jeremy, is precisely why these devices were developed. They help those who otherwise would be unable to reach the necessary level of physical development. Now you, Jeremy, were a special case. You didn’t need a device like this. You got your physical conditioning from another source, from another young man who had already been conditioned thanks to one of these devices, and who was then able to pass that conditioning on to you. And because you had already been conditioned physically, you were primed, so to speak; you were willing and able to undergo the mental conditioning that allowed you to start becoming the athlete you wanted to become. Do you understand now?”

“Well, Coach, sort of, but the whole thing is a bit over my head. You’re saying that because I made out with…” I stopped, embarrassed.

“You don’t need to say anything more about that, Jeremy. I’m not trying to pry into your private life. But yes, having the kind of relationship you did started to condition you physically. And once we noticed that that process was happening to you, there was nothing left to do but complete the physical process by helping you to condition mentally. Otherwise, you would have been a very unhappy and confused young man. You’re perfectly happy now, aren’t you, big guy?”

“Perfectly, Coach. Happier than I’ve ever been. I know I’m, like, different than I was before, I suppose, but I would never want to go back. Honestly, it’s hard for me to remember now that I wasn’t always a jock. But what about Chase? I want him to be happy. This thing won’t hurt him, will it? He’s my friend, after all, and I wouldn’t want him hurt.”

“No, Jeremy. No one wants to hurt Chase or anyone else. Remember that these devices were developed to help young men reach their potential. But I want to be completely honest with you: it will cause him some physical discomfort. How much depends on the person. So, Jeremy, technically it can hurt him, but think of it like weight training. You’re still sore from yesterday’s workout, aren’t you? It hurt you, right? And yet you know that the pain is necessary for your muscles to grow, and that it will soon go away, and you’ll be stronger for it. If you really care for your friend, Jeremy, then you want what’s best for him, don’t you? I’ve seen Chase, Jeremy, and he’s a very slight young man. As he is now, he might have some potential as, say, a lightweight wrestler, but without the physical conditioning that this device can provide, he would be extremely limited in what he could accomplish as an athlete. But if you like him and he likes you, just imagine what it would be like to be a couple like James and Steve, both of you strong and powerful. Wouldn’t that be worth some trouble, Jeremy?”

“Yes, it would, Coach. I think I understand now. How long would he have to wear it?”

“It varies from person to person. Usually about a week or two, but sometimes longer. But you don’t need to worry about that. All you have to worry about is giving this to him. And remember, Derek or another one of the experience students can give it to him if you’re not comfortable doing it yourself.”

“I appreciate your wanting to help me, Coach, but I think that if I really want what’s best for Chase, I’m the one who has to do this. I can’t pass that responsibility on to someone else.”

“Then I respect your decision, son. Here, take it, and keep it safe. And remember, don’t mention anything about this to anyone. When you’re ready, you open the package and quickly place it over his privates. It doesn’t matter what he’s wearing at the time.”

“Oh, one other question, Coach. It won’t make him dumb or anything, will it? I mean, Chase called me a dumb jock, but I don’t think I’m any dumber than I was before.”

“Jeremy, ‘dumb jock’ is a stereotype. Most jocks are just a smart as anyone else. Some are smarter. Some aren’t. Many young men who’ve gone through this conditioning process have had some struggle with grades, but that isn’t necessarily because they lost intelligence. It’s because their interests and focus changed, and they ended up less motivated by academics. That’s why I warned you not to neglect your studies. I don’t think you need to worry about Chase. He may end up more interested in sports than English class, but that doesn’t make you an idiot. Any more questions?”

“No, Coach.”

“Then you’d better get to wrestling practice before I have to explain to Coach Halvorson why you’re late.”

The coach had given me a ton to think about, but I had no time to think right away. I had wrestling practice, and that took all the concentration I had. Both James and his bro Tyler went out for wrestling, but I didn’t spar with either one of them. They’re both heavyweights. I may be taller than both of them, but I don’t have anywhere near their muscle mass or weight. They’re both scary in a singlet, with their huge muscles, thick necks, and massive packages. Tyler’s the bigger man, but I think James has the bigger tool, not that Tyler’s isn’t obscene enough. But I didn’t realize how big I had gotten down there until I saw myself in my singlet again. I’d almost be too embarrassed to walk out into the gym like that, except that I’m not the only guy who’s showing. My balls must be nearly the size of chicken eggs by now. I wondered what Chase would think seeing me in this outfit.

Chase. It wasn’t until after practice, hitting the weight room, dinner, and a long night of catching up on homework that I allowed my thoughts to drift back to Chase. I missed him, and I couldn’t believe he was happy. I sent him a text, just saying “Miss u”. He didn’t answer, but at least he hadn’t blocked my number.

I knew I needed to talk to him again, but he was avoiding me. I wouldn’t let that stop me, but it was hard to find a moment to catch him without a bunch of other bros around, you know? And I had other worries. Clothes were getting to be a problem. My parents seemed to think I was just going through a phase of wearing workout clothes; somehow it hadn’t gotten through to them how much I had grown or that nothing in my closet fit me anymore. I was borrowing stuff from the other bros. I had maybe one or two pairs of shorts that fit, and some sweatpants that barely fit. I mean, I was almost 6’ 2” at this point, which means I had gained something like 6 inches in a few weeks. I was starting to pack on a lot of muscle, too. I finally had to tell them outright that I really needed some new clothes. My older brother was away at college, and I did find a couple of things in his closet that worked up to a point, but we weren’t really the same size. I stuck to basics for the new stuff, mainly loose shorts, athletic pants, and T-shirts. I still had a lot of growing to do, and I didn’t want to get things I was just going to grow out of in a hurry. I knew at this point that I looked, dressed, and acted like a total jock, but I was a total jock, and everyone except Chase seemed to forget that I’d ever been anything else.

To be continued

[cutelittleriot]

Return to origin holiday special part 2 finale

It's been about 3 days since the holiday party and Barb had eaten the origin fruit and everything was going fine in Pop village.

Poppy was busy getting ready to help Bridget with her wedding and Branch was off helping King Gristle at the moment with preparations.

She was off to go get some recipes to use for the party when Debbie showed up and flew up to her holding a letter. "Oh it's already that time? Man it sure does pass quickly I swore it was like it was only yesterday" Poppy jokes as she pets Debbie's fur.

Debbie feeling tired from the flight rests beside Poppy for the moment and she happily beging to pet the little bat as she opens up the letter.

'Yo Poppy

It's Barb I decided I'm gonna write as the days progress so right now it's the day after I ate that glitter bomb of a fruit and right now I'm so ITCHY! WOW HOW DID YOU TWO DEAL WITH THAT?!

Also along with this stupid itchiness my back has been hurting nothing too bad but it's very annoying. Thanks to these 2 annoyances I can't even rock out properly. I decided I'm gonna use my rage room for now until this stupid phase ends.

Apparently next are the fangs I can't wait to get them! Well wish me luck tomorrow but for you it's the next part of this letter.'

Poppy raised a eyebrow in confusion,what did she mean her back was hurting? That never happened to her or Branch. It might be a rock troll thing hopefully,she just hopes Barb is alright.

Day 2

Yo so uhm I got my fangs they are cool and all but why did some of my other teeth also get sharp? Like all of my front teeth are now sharp,they aren't as long as my fangs but still.

I don't hate them though far from it I love them to death they make me look so cool! Bet it's a rock troll thing but I'm doing what your little loverboy said and I'm writing this down even if I hate doing this ugh

But yeah I bit into some meat and there were my old teeth I'm so keeping them btw after that my other teeth were hurting for the entire day that wasn't fun but still

Oh also back is still hurting btw I checked it out I have these 2 bumps on them I should probably be concerned but I really don't care it's not like they have prevented me from doing anything so I don't care

Anyways time to Wait for tomorrow ugh I really don't want those pads they make me look so....cutesy ugh'

Poppy is now beginning to get worried for her friend. There's bumps on her back now?! And her other teeth are sharpened?! She quickly tries to calm herself down again it is probably just a rock troll thing.

Day 3

Alright so I'm getting pawpads but the weird thing is I'm only getting them on the palm of my hands for some reason?

Well I'm not complaining that's for sure they are tolerable that's all I'm saying for now

Well that's all that's going on for now but before I go I noticed my pupils are becoming more slitted that's cool and those bumps on ky back are bigger now and for some reason i can sort of move them? Anyways later Poppy gonna go rock out for a while

Poppy reread that part again,pupils become slitted?! And what does she mean she can move those bumps now?!

She definately needs to tell Branch about this later. Debbie who is now better after resting for a bit gets up and nuzzles her before flying off and Poppy waves off the little bat.

She really hopes Barb is doing alright though.

It's been 4 days since the last letter arrived and Poppy has been anxious she knows how it went for her and Branch she could only imagine what pain Barb went through.

Her tail twitching in anxiousness she waits for the sound of Debbie's wings flapping or even her scent to ease her worries. She has been getting used to her heightened senses it has taken some getting used to though,but now she can mostly handle it.

Soon enough her ears twitch and she can hear the familiar sound and she smiles in anticipation but also in worry.

She quickly takes the letter from the bat who decides to lay in her hair to rest. She uses her claws to tear open the letter and begins to read it.

Day 4

'Alright so I know somethings up cause from that encyclopedia your boyfriend gave me I think somethings different is happening to me right now.

Cause my fingertips are bright red and they feel weird, they don't really hurt they actually feel more numb than anything and they feel more.....hard than anything else. They look like claws they are pointed but unlike yours they sure don't retract or anything like that.

I dig em tho they look cool and I bet I could perform some even more sick rifts with these things!

Well that's all oh and I checked the mirror and yeah my pupils are definately slits now and those bumps are continuing to grow ugh its starting to become hard to wear shirts anymore

Anyways that's all later

Poppy tilts her head "Hmmm?" So looks like rock troll claws are different compared to pop troll claws very good information to know. She begins to read day 5's entry

Day 5

So I now have full on claws on my hands so that's cool. Oh also it seems I don't really have paws compared to you two they are more hand like than paw like.

Anywho got those pads growing on my feet now again I don't have any on my toes just the bottom of my feet feels weird ngl

But that's all for now I have to cut holes in my shirts for those bumps tho my dad knows what they are but he won't tell me he just says I will like how they will turn out whatever that means

Laterz

Poppy is now more curious as to what Barb will look like but now she is dreading the next days entry that's when it's at its worst. Bracing herself she continues on.

Day 6

Ow

That's it

She blinks once twice and rereads it. "Ow? Just ow?" She asks outloud. THAT DOESNT GIBE ANY CONTEXT AS TO WHAT HAPPENED WHAT DOES SHE MEAN OW?!

Her ears lower as she tries to figure out just what Barb meant by 'ow'. That one word alone could mean so many things. Did she get didigrade legs like her and Branch? Did something else happen?

She is left with those thoughts as Debbie flies off back home. She takes the letter and heads back to her pod. She just hopes Barb is alright, she knew what she was signing up for when she ate that fruit but still. She goes to sleep hoping everything will be alright.

It's the next day and Poppy was still busy preparing stuff for Bridget's wedding when her ears perk up and she hears the sound of a angler bus approaching. Looking up she sees it descend and it opens up revealing....Barb and her new self and wow she looks so cool.

Branch who heard the angler bus too heads over to where Poppy is and gapes at Barb. She grins showing off her sharp teeth and jumps down from the angler bus.

"Whats up guys ya like my new look?" She grins as the two take in her appearance. Her fur wasn't as long as theirs for sure but still there. The ends of her fingers have turned into bright red claws and a dark red pawpad was on the palm of her hand.

The same thing goes for her toes as they too have been turned into claws along with her new digigrade legs. Her tail sways behind her,it was the same color as her fur with a bright red line of fur going from the base to near the end of the tip of her tail which is now shaped like a arrow. Her slit pupils look over the two as she gazes their reactions.

"Oh my gosh Barb you look so cool!"Poppy gushes as she looks her over. "If you think this is cool check these out!" She says and turns around showing off "Are those wings?!" Branch exclaims as he looks at the two wings that were folded against Barbs back. They were the same color as her fur with the inside being a bright red.

"Yep our ancestors had wings and such,don't know why we don't know cause these are so cool!" She tells them as her tail wags and the wings give a little flap.

"I honestly can't imagine having wings having a tail is weird enough but even more limbs and appendages? Yeah no" Branch says shuddering at the thought of having wings.

"Can you fly with them?" Poppy asks curiously. "Yep sure can but only for a very short time before I'm exhausted,trust me it's not as easy as you think it took me hours to try and just get off the ground" Barb complains.

"But yeah I'm liking the new look don't regret eating that thing. So you guys want to go hang and do some crazy stuff?" Barb asks with a feral grin. "Uh yeah!" Poppy agree with her tail wagging in excitement. "Uh Poppy maybe we shouldnt?" Branch says a bit apprehensive. "Alright then chicken we will leave you out of this" Barb says intentionally annoying Branch who grumbles before joining the two as they go out and have some fun in their new bodies and to help Barb get used to her new self.

For rock trolls it goes

Stage 1 fur

Stage 2 fangs and teeth

Stage 3 pawpads

Stage 4 claws

Stage 5 pawpads on feet

Stage 6 toes turn into claws and legs become digigrade

Stage 7 tail grows

And throughout this entire process wings are slowly growing out of the trolls back they allow the troll to fly but only for very short periods and then the troll will have to rest for a bit

Here she is (I tried guys I really did)

[the-widow-sisters]

Heyy! Could you do “I don’t want to be a burden.” with Natasha and Carol please?

A/N: I kinda feel like this one came out weird, but I've been having a bit of a weird time yesterday and today 😅

Anyways, I hope it came out at least fairly well! Thank you for your request! 💖💖💖

Original Prompt List

Word Count: 1.6k+

   “Why don’t you ever say anything when you need something?” Natasha asked, her voice relatively quiet despite it only being Carol and Natasha in the kitchen and the nearby area.

   They had finished training, and Natasha had actually been the one to stop it because she had managed to discern that Carol was actually sore and had needed to stop to keep from making things more sore.

   It was truly a rare day that Carol ever was hurt, but it had been largely because she had recently gone to space to sort out some sort of giant creature that she had to take care of for a planet. It was big enough to create an apocalyptic-type situation there, and it had managed to get in several good hits on Carol, leaving her hurting a little.

   However, she had not said anything about it to Natasha when the redhead had asked her to come and train with her. Yelena was off on a mission with Kate of all people so the opportunity had arisen for Carol and Natasha to spend quality time with just the two of them, and Carol was never one to pass that up. The only reason Natasha had figured out about Carol’s pain was because Carol was not using her powers during their sparring session and Natasha had hit her in just the right place to cause her to actually wince.

   It had been such an unordinary happenstance that Natasha had caught on immediately and Carol had been forced to admit that she was indeed a little in pain.

   “Because I never need anything,” Carol tried to respond coolly as she pulled out a cup so she could pour herself some of the cold chocolate milk in the fridge. Natasha raised an eyebrow, not impressed.

   “But be careful asking stuff like that, Nat, it might be the pot calling the kettle black or something like that,” Carol warned her as she smirked unashamedly. Natasha remained quiet, still staring her down.

   “I’m a big girl. Don’t worry about me,” Carol assured her, pouring her drink as she kept up her side of the conversation despite Natasha’s lack of input.

   “I think someone should,” Natasha commented finally, and Carol shook her head as she put the milk jug away.

   “I’m invincible.”

   “Until you get into a fight with a space monster and I hit you in the wrong place,” Natasha pointed out.

   “You could argue it was in the right place,” Carol shrugged with a grin that she tried to at least partially hide behind the rim of her drink, still trying to bring levity to the situation. Natasha sighed, and Carol could tell that her patience was growing slightly thinner.

   Carol let out a breath as she decided to finally concede.

   “Look, I don’t know. I’m just… I’m supposed to be the strong one, I guess. I don’t want to be a burden,” Carol confessed.

   “You’re not a burden. To anyone,” Natasha expressed.

   “Yeah. Because I try not to be,” Carol told her with a huff, risking the joke despite the somber atmosphere set up between them in the conversation. Natasha did not look amused as she stared at Carol. Carol looked down, her smile fading as she was instantly reminded so much of Maria that it hurt.

   “Who would you be burdening by admitting that you’re hurting?” Natasha asked.

   “Well, I mean… I wouldn’t be burdening anybody by saying that, I guess, but… Nobody wants to hear about my pain and all that,” Carol laughed a little, trying to fill the silence that she felt was building despite the fact that there was no logical reason for her to feel that way. It was likely her uncomfortableness with the topic that was causing those sentiments.

   “What makes you any different from the rest of us?” Natasha questioned, her voice gentle yet commanding all the same. Carol let out a breath, drinking another sip of chocolate milk.

   “I don’t know. I just… I don’t want to bother anybody with me. I’m here to help, and that’s my job,” Carol confessed, and Natasha tilted her head a little, looking at Carol as if she had not quite caught onto the theoretical secret that Natasha was in on.

   “We’re all Avengers. We’re all here to help. We’re also all here to help each other,” Natasha informed her, stepping closer to Carol as she pushed off of the counter and moved forward.

   “Well, yeah, but you know what I mean. You’re the same way,” Carol stated plainly, and Natasha nodded, agreeing at least partially.

   “I may or may not be, but this isn’t about me right now,” Natasha said, and Carol huffed as took another drink of the chocolate milk in her cup.

   “Seems one-way to me,” Carol commented, trying to make a joke, and Natasha shook her head as she crossed her arms.

   “Just because you’re older numerically doesn’t make you the senior agent. Or the person who’s older mentally. I’ve been in the Avengers far longer than you,” Natasha said to her.

   “Yeah, right. I was the first Avenger technically. Steve is the oldest of us and theoretically the first, but the truth was that Fury started the Avengers because of me and my call sign,” Carol made her claim as she grinned widely, and Natasha huffed.

   “I should also be older mentally since I’m physically older.”

   “I’m older to this world, Carol,” Natasha told her, a certain wiseness in her gaze, and Carol’s face softened as she agreed with Natasha, putting down her drink.

   “Yeah, I know. You’ve lived a lot more in this world in a lot more ways than I have,” Carol stated, recognizing Natasha’s experience.

   Natasha stared at her for a few moments, not saying anything, and Carol knew that the woman was thinking through what she was about to drop on her.

   “Carol, you can’t be perfect all the time,” Natasha informed her firmly after the silence that passed between them. Carol let out a sharp breath of amusement.

   “I could say the same thing to you,” Carol told her simply as she smirked just a little, still finding a way to turn it around so that the spotlight was hitting both of them.

   “Yeah, but you don’t talk to anyone, and I actually do end up talking to someone. You pretty much just keep your mouth shut until someone happens to take a second look or until you’re literally caught breaking down and even then it’s a fight to get you to explain because all you want to do is make jokes to cover it all up,” Natasha told her simply as she leaned in a little closer.

   Carol’s smile faltered.

   Natasha knew her far too well for her own good. It was so much how Maria had, and Carol sucked in a deep breath as she looked away for a moment.

    Natasha’s hands landed on Carol’s shoulders and Carol looked back at her.

   “Everyone needs something sometimes, Carol. It’s okay to need from people,” Natasha informed her firmly.

   Carol swallowed hard, thinking of all the times that she had needed some manner of emotional or physical support from Maria. She had almost always gotten it, but it was generally because Maria had caught her or noticed something off about her. Carol rarely— if ever— initiated it of her own accord.

   “I’ve always been like this, y’know,” Carol admitted, wetting her lips as she tried not to think about the sorrow she felt at not having Maria any longer. Natasha was so much like her in some ways, and it practically hurt.

   “Even with Maria,” Carol conceded. Carol shook her head with a sigh.

   “I wish… I wish I had actually asked for things from her more often. I mean… I didn’t want to burden her, but looking back on it, if I could just have a little more of her,” Carol stopped herself,  the sudden urge to cry coming over her as she clenched her teeth hard and did her best not to.

   “I know.”

   Carol did not quite know how this had all come back to Maria’s loss all over again. It always somehow seemed to. Maria left a gaping hole in her wake, and somehow because Natasha reminded Carol of her, that grief always inevitably resurfaced when in Natasha’s presence. It always came over Carol frighteningly fast and with just as much force and hurt every time.

   “I want you to be able to depend on all of us. I know we’re not Maria, but I want you to be able to lean on us and rely on us, Carol,” Natasha expressed.

   Carol was quiet for several moments. Natasha was arguably her best friend and Natasha was one of the people that was closest to her apart from Yelena and Monica. She knew that she owed it to Natasha to be honest with her and trust her with Carol’s true self.

   Carol finally moved her head in agreement.

   “I will,” Carol assured her, her words barely a vocalization.

   Natasha hummed in acknowledgement. Carol did not say anything as she stared at the other woman, just thinking over what else she even should say. It felt like there was more that needed to be said.

   Natasha was always there for her and always stuck by her and was such a good friend. Carol truly did love Natasha so much and while she was not the same as Maria, she was still perfect in her own right.

   “Thank you,” Carol expressed her gratitude, and Natasha furrowed her brow just a little as she shook her head.

   “You don’t have to thank me. I—we all love you,” Natasha expressed.

   Carol could hear Natasha’s slight hesitance to actually say her own feelings out loud. Carol felt her heart ache for one of her true best friends, and she took hold within her the courage to say out loud what Natasha was afraid to.

   “I love you, too, Natasha,” Carol whispered to her in response. Natasha’s eyes softened, a smile coming over her face as she gazed back at Carol.

   Natasha really was the best friend that anyone could ask for.

[gothic-lottie]

7, Hot chocolate or cider?

Well, cider is spicy (my autistic ass taste buds think it is anyway so Isobel thinks so too) and hot chocolate is a core part of her first happy Christmas. Here are some Christmas snippets, all from Sebastian's POV

5th year

Once we were all inside, Ominis went to greet Anne and talk with her while I set the groceries on the kitchen table. Isobel followed me. 

“So, you're going to talk to Ominis soon, right? I want Anne to have as carefree a holiday as possible.”

“Yes, I'll talk to him once I get this stuff put away.”

“Perfect, what'd you get?”

“Just normal Christmas dinner and sweets.” She was still staring at me as if that wasn't an adequate answer. “You know, ham, potatoes, cranberries, candy canes, chocolate to make hot chocolate…”

“Oh, that sounds lovely. Why would we make the chocolate hot though?”

She's joking, right? She doesn't seem like she's joking…

“Hot chocolate is a drink. Anne'll be floored to find out you don't know what it is.”

She suddenly seemed anxious… like I had discovered some awful secret.

“So everyone knows that? Maybe it's just not common in the muggle world.”

“No, it's definitely common outside the wizarding world.” I sighed, feeling a little bad at how anxious she seemed “I won't tell Anne if you don't want me to. Why don't you know this anyway?”

“I would appreciate it if you didn't tell Anne. My family just… didn't participate in many holiday traditions. Poppy had to tell me why there were trees all around the castle.”

That's sad but she's definitely not telling me the full story here. I don't really care. It's none of my business, we aren't even friends. I don't like her anyway but it's hard to hate her when she seems like an injured puppy or something.

“I won't say anything. Go talk to Anne. She's been waiting for you all day.”

“Okay. Let me know if there's something I can do to help with cooking or anything else.”

She went to sit with Anne after that.

6th year (this one's sad. Chapter's literally titled "The Worst Christmas")

When we reached the end of the pile, there was just one gift left. Ominis passed it to me after checking the tag. When I looked, it read simply “Twins”. It was still Isobel’s handwriting but when I opened it, I was met with a box of peppermint toads and a pack of sugar quills. The sweets Anne and I should have exchanged. There was a letter attached to the toads box. I couldn’t help my hands shaking as I opened it.

“Dear Sebastian,

Merry Chriatmas-”

This was Anne’s writing.

“I know you probably want to lay in bed all day. It's your first without me after all, but I want you to get up for me. At least have dinner. Maybe have a walk around the vivarium, make some hot chocolate for Isobel and Ominis, and eat these peppermint toads. You can do this. I believe in you.

And please check on Bell for me. I think you two might really need each other right now.

Your Better Half,

Anne”

I took a shaky breath and pressed my face into my sleeves, trying to rid myself of the tears welling up in my eyes. She’s right as always. I would rather stay in bed but I shouldn’t. I know walking a bit and having something to eat will help but… it all feels so empty without her.

7th year (still subject to change, not published yet)

I woke up this morning early, determined to make our first Christmas at home something special. 

Ominis has only known happy holidays with me and Anne, aside from what he insists was a good holiday with Marvolo in second year, and Isobel… She said she had happy holidays when her father was alive but she hardly remembers those. The only things she’d wanted were the homemade mint candies Anne used to make, which we did yesterday, and hot chocolate. She didn’t even know what that was our first year together. Her other holiday tradition was something we can’t really do. She wanted to hear a church choir. It sounded like a nice idea but there are no churches nor choirs similar nearby.

Today it’ll be just me, Isobel, and Ominis. Penny is joining us for lunch but refused any further invitations. Isobel is going to be here most of the day but promised Poppy she’d join the Sweetings for dinner so we’re having holiday food at lunch, meaning I have less time to figure out what I’m doing. My mom and dad had a couple great holiday recipes we made together every year but I hadn’t thought to find their cookbook when Anne and I moved into Solomon’s house, an oversight I’ve regretted ever since. I sighed as I stared at the pile of ingredients I’d gathered on the table. I really don’t know what I’m doing. 

I decided to start first on something I remember being relatively easy; cranberry sauce. Dad acquired a taste for it on a trip to the states before Anne and I were around so we had it every year. I poured the bag of cranberries I’d bought into a pot. What else was there to it? Mom always gave me a pile of oranges to juice for this. I can do that. I started on juicing oranges, already feeling a bit sad at the realization that I don’t remember much other than what I was told to do as a nine year old and that really wasn’t enough to piece family recipes back together.

I was pulled out of my thoughts by a noise from the loft. 

“Isobel, don’t jump. My hands are covered in in orange juice.”

I waited to hear some sort of affirmative noise in response before resuming my task. She climbed down with no insistence on being caught a few minutes later.

“Good morning. You’re up early”

“You’re up earlier.” She muttered, rubbing her eyes. “What are you making?” 

“Cranberry sauce… hopefully.”

“Anything I can help with?”

“Not at the moment. Get yourself something for breakfast.” I heard the candy dish by the door. “Something other than candy. You can’t just eat those, even if they “taste like Anne” which is still gross by the way. I like those too and that statement is making it hard to eat them.”

She huffed and sat at the table. “Fine” When I turned to pour the orange juice into the pot, she was cutting a slice of bread. “Are we seeing the Weasleys today?”

“No, they’re visiting the Lovegood side this year and not even I want to meet that many new people.”

“Right… Can we make hot chocolate?”

“When I’m done with this. What else did mom do with this?... I think some water and like, a stick? She used to eat the stick after, what the hell was that?” I looked through my shelf of spices, eye landing on the tin of cinnamon sticks. Did my mom eat cinnamon sticks??? It was the closest thing to what I remembered so I dropped one in and poured water in till the cranberries were covered. I guess that looks right? I shrugged and set it on the stove. “Can you watch this for me? Mix it occasionally and tell me when all the skins have split.”

“Okay.” Isobel finished her bread then tied an apron on and pulled up a stool by the stove to stare at the pot. I smiled and washed my hands before starting on some hot chocolate.

The curtain separating our bed off opened and Ominis came shuffling over to the table, wrapped in all the quilts off our bed.

“Good morning love, how’d you sleep?”

“I don’t want to be awake but it’s warmer over here.” he muttered, laying his head on his blanketed arms on the table.

“You can take a nap if you want.” I kissed his head and set a mug of hot chocolate in front of him, smiling at how cute he is all cocooned in blankets with his hair messy.

[bertie-whump]

Whumpcember Day 1 - Fever

I'm a little late to the party, but I've literally just discovered the wonder world of whump and wanted to join in. Hoping to get caught up over the next couple of days. Enjoy! @whumpcember

*

“Rosie, are you ok in there?” A knocking came from the door, and I opened my eyes, blinking blearily up at the ceiling. Everything seemed fuzzy and distant. The door opened and Jay came into the room. “You’re normally up long before now, love.”

I glanced at the clock; it was almost eleven. “Fuck.” I sat up but didn’t manage to get very far before everything seemed to swim before my eyes and the edges of my vision started to go black. I heard hurried footsteps against the carpet and then two hands pressed me back down into the mattress.

“Nope, we are not doing that today. You are not passing out,” Jay said. “Take some deep breaths, until the dizziness goes away.” I did as he said, and soon I was, if not clear-headed, not on the verge of fainting. “Well done. How long have you been feeling sick?”

“I’m not sick,” I protested, going to sit up again, but Jay’s hands on my shoulders kept me pressed to the bed. “Jahan, I swear to God, let me up. I can’t still be in bed.”

“You are not bullying me with the use of my full name. And bed is exactly where you’re staying; you’ll obviously poorly.” One of his hands moved to my forehead. His skin felt cool against my own. “And you have a temperature, so I’ll ask again, how long have you felt sick.”

“Started feeling off yesterday morning, but I’m fine it’s probably just a cold,” I told him. 

“Rosie, you live in a house with two doctors, you could have told one of us,” James admonished. I watched through half lidded eyes as he pulled his phone from his pocket, dialling one of his contacts and setting it to speaker. 

“Calling me from upstairs is a new level of laziness, even for you,” Rowan said on the other end of the line, and I smiled, knowing the other man was probably downstairs. 

“Yeah, well, I’ve got good reason. Can you bring the thermometer and some paracetamol to Rosie’s room, please?” Jay asked. 

“Why, what’s wrong?” His tone went immediately from joking to concerned instantly.

“Probably just a cold, but she’s warm and I want to know how bad it is,” Jay said, casually. Rowan said he’d get what was needed, and Jay hung up. “Can I trust you to stay put if I disappear for a moment?” he asked, one eyebrow raised. 

“Sure,” I muttered, closing my eyes. I was too exhausted to worry about getting out of bed at the moment anyway. 

I heard the door open and close and then the same about a minute later. 

“Rosie,” Jay said, back in the room, “I’m going to swap your duvet for a blanket, try to cool you down a bit.” He didn’t even wait for my permission before stripping away my lovely winter duvet.

I immediately started to shiver as the cold air of my bedroom hit my skin. I reached out, trying to grab hold of the cover and pull it back over me. Seconds later, a much thinner blanket drifted over me, blocking out the worst of the cold, though I still missed my duvet. 

The mattress dipped as Jay sat down and ran a hand through my hair. “How are you feeling?”

“Quite rubbish, to be honest,” I told him, voice cracking. God, I hated being sick. 

“Well, don’t worry, Doctors Chowdhury and Brown are going to look after you.” 

Before I could say anything in reply, the door opened again, and Rowan’s voice drifted over to me. “I’ve got the thermometer, but we’re out of paracetamol. I managed to find the Calpol from the last time Haz was sick, though, so we can use that.” 

I was secretly glad of that. My throat hurt and I didn’t fancy trying to choke down the chalky pills at the moment. 

Rowan passed Jay the thermometer and he pressed it gently into my ear. “Wanna place bets?” he asked, and I rolled my eyes, bringing on another small wave of dizziness. I took a few deep breaths.

The thermometer beeped and Jay lifted it from my ear to look at the tiny screen. His eyebrows rose. 

“Is it bad?” I asked.

“It’s not great. 39.8.” He turned the screen towards me, even though I had no hope of focusing my eyes to read the number. I’d take his word for it. “Right, Calpol and then we’ll leave you to rest.” He looped his arm around my shoulders. “1,2,3 up we go.” He helped me to sit up.

I reached for the small cup of Calpol in Rowan’s hand. He handed it to me, and I drank it down, screwing up my nose at the artificial strawberry taste that I’d loved as a kid but apparently didn’t now. 

“Sleep now?” I asked, too tired to form a proper sentence as Jay laid me back down.

“Yeah, Rosie, sleep now. We’ll wake you in a few hours for more meds.” 

I nodded, already closing my eyes. 

[amethyyst]

Vampire detective

CW: blood, mention of murder

Vampire stretched their arms above their head and let out a long yawn. It would be morning soon, they should start heading to their apartment. They shut off their computer and put away the files, gliding the glass door to the office.

"Ah, Vampire. On your way home?" A woman appeared from a different room, holding a few files in her hands.

Vampire smiled. "Yeah. Summer sucks with those short nights."

"I like summer." The woman walked away, a smile on her lips, humming some tune.

Yeah, most humans did prefer summer, huh. Long, warm days.

Vampire left the police station, looking around. A few people they recognized were exiting their cars. Vampire frowned. They were early.

They took out there phone checking to check the time.

Oh. Oh no.

They stepped back into the building, but held the door open for some of the people. One of them - Detective - waited for them in the hall. "Not going home?"

"I was going to, but..." they trailed off, glancing at the red sky. They wouldn't make it home, not when the sun was already rising. "I guess i was too focused on work..."

"You're staying in the office, then?"

"I guess... not that I have an other choice." They walked back, feeling some police officers glance at them with mistrust. Right. The whole reason they chose to go home at day and work alone in the office at night.

Their work colleges didn't trust them, except for their team and a handful of others. They were a vampire after all. A lot of the murder cases these days involved vampires. Mainly as the murderer, and not the victim.

In their office they sat back down on their desk, glancing towards the small window on one side of the room. "Would you mind if I..."

"Cover it? Nah, go ahead."

Vampire managed to cover the window with their jacket and only get sunburned very lightly. Detective had asked them if they had needed help once, but they had refused. And they didn't need to know vampire had burned themselves a little either.

They weren't supposed to be here now anyway, so they didn't want to bother any of their colleges at all. Two other detectives entered.

"Oh, Vampire! What a pleasant surprise!" Detective Smiths sat down at her desk, smiling brightly. "Have you decided to work overtime? Or did you want to work at day with us today?"

"I didn't notice how late it had gotten... good thing I didn't go home. I would definitely be burned down to ashes by now." They answered. They had tried to make it sound like a joke, but detective Smiths smile dropped and her brown furrowed in pity.

The other detective who had come in with her - detective Wood - glanced at the window. "Must be hard huh?"

"You get used to it after... a few years."

A file landed on their desk. Detective looked over the wall separating the desks. "You want work?"

"Leave then be, detective. Hasn't vampire worked all night already?" Detective smiths complained, but vampire just raised their hands. "No it's alright. If I already have to stay here, they why not."

They were a little tired, but they would just have to push through. "I'll just go home for the night then."

Another thing they noticed was, that they were beginning to feel hungry. They didn't bring any animal blood with them, because why would they? They only ate at home, and carrying around blood was weird to humans, especially if a detective from the local police is carrying it.

Vampire began looking through the file. A murder case, again. The victim was a young woman. Her body was found near the police station by two women who had wanted to report theft yesterday. They were signs of vampire involvement, but also claw and knife marks.

Detective spoke up. "We're going to investigate the crime scene again once the captain is here. A murder this close to the station will definitely be covered by the news, do we have to solve this quickly."

Vampire glanced over the file again, the passed it over to detective Wood.

Then they sat there an listened as the other three discussed where and what they would be searching for.

Of course, vampire couldn't go. The sun would burn them instantly. Even if the alley was dark, they somehow needed to get there too. And that meant stepping into the sun.

Detective seemed to sense their disappointment, because they placed a hand on their shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. "You wanna tag along?"

Vampire looked up, surprised and confused. "Huh?"

"Only you're skin can't touch sunlight, yes? So when it's hidden by fabric it's fine?"

"Depends on how thick the fabric is, but yes."

"Fantastic. You'll take my jacket then." Said jacket landed in vampires head a second later. "Alright then, after the captain shows up, were leaving."

[foggyfanfic]

The Jorge Situation

Preview: Day ten (night): Crack opened up right in front of me, ran out to the courtyard to ask Casita what had happened. Casita had no clue. Leandra, I know it’ll be pre-coffee when you wake up and read this, but can you ask around to see if anything of note happened last night? Also, your dog is making that weird smell again, it’s worrying the rats.

5. Passing Notes

Day One: Technically this isn’t day one, I know that, but it is day one of taking notes so yeah. Anyways, five new cracks. Casita got really messy today when Amada and Camilo decided juice is for throwing at eachother, not drinking. Casita didn’t seem upset, but maybe Casita is just being very patient with them? They are only kids. Pepa’s hormones are playing havoc on the weather, so she has been trapped in her room all day, Could the cracks be responding to her frustration? Octavia stubbed her toe and said a bad word, one that I certainly didn’t teach her, Leandra doesn’t see what’s wrong with the kids saying bad words every once in a while. No matter how many times I tell her it’s rude, and could get them in trouble. Maybe the cracks happen when somebody in our family is rude? Or when we fail to live up to the miracle’s standards?

-Bruno

To Bruno,

As I said, I don’t want our kids growing up thinking words like “fuck” or “Asshole” should be used as weapons. I am very familiar with the “I only use those words when I want people to know I’m serious” philosophy, and I think it’s immature. If you’re serious then you shouldn’t be cursing, you should be speaking as calmly as you can manage! Stubbing her toe is the perfect time for Octavia to say “shit”, the only better way to use that sort of language is to compliment somebody. For example, “Holy shit! My husband is handsome as fuck”. See! Isn’t that nice, wouldn’t you rather our kids grow up to say things like that? Anyways, if you read this before you come back to bed, feel free to wake me. I worry about you crawling around in the walls all alone (because I love you a fuck ton).

In short, I’m completely correct,

Leandra

Day two: Alright darling, I see your point, I still worry the kids might make trouble for themselves if they get used to using that sort of language. What about when Octavia goes to school? We need to talk to her about when those words are and are not ok. Anyways, one of the cracks from yesterday has sealed itself up, but two more have formed on the opposite end of the wall. Nothing happened that might have upset Casita today. No change with Pepa. Luisa had to get a healing arepa when she twisted her ankle. Is it more likely that her physical pain effected the cracks? Or Julieta’s worry? What about Agustín and Félix? Do they have any effect on the cracks?

-Bruno

To Bruno,

Yeah, you’re right, wake me up when you see this. Let’s figure out what we’ll tell her. About the cracks, if Agustín and Félix affect them, I probably do too.

Be safe,

Leandra

Day Three: Casita in a good mood. No change with Pepa. No injuries in the family. Talk with Octavia went well. Cracks same as yesterday.

Day four: Same as yesterday (except we didn’t repeat the talk with Octavia).

Day five: Had surprise vision, saw Pepa’s newborn son. Asked her if she wanted to know the gender of her baby. She spent the next hour pacing back and forth, trying to make up her mind one way or another. She eventually decided no, I got up to leave, then because I’m the world’s most subtle person I said, “For the best, he was a happy surprise, right? Might as well keep it going”. By her own admission, Pepa is not sure if she wants to laugh or smack me. Says she’ll know when she wakes up tomorrow. Leandra did an admirable job of pretending she wasn’t amused by my being a total disaster. Agustín and Félix did less admirable jobs. All but one of the new cracks have closed.

To Bruno,

Maybe they were laughing about something else? Maybe they both just happened to think of a really funny joke right when you finished telling us what happened.

Love you,

Leandra

Day six: Don’t patronize me. The joke was me, mi amor. Three new cracks, nothing of significance happened to cause them as far as I know.

To Bruno,

You’re not a joke.

Love,

Leandra

Day seven: Tell Camilo that.

To Bruno,

Everything and everybody is a joke to Camilo.

Love,

Leandra

Day Eight: That’s true. Two new cracks, no fucking clue why.

To Bruno,

Dearie me! Such foul language! Gasp! Shock! Horror! Whatever shall the miracle think?

I’ll pray for you,

Leandra

Day Nine: “You’re not a joke” said Leandra, my supposedly loving wife, lying to my face. If you wake up and I’m gone, no need to wonder why. Unbelievable!

To Bruno,

This note is made even funnier by the fact that I woke up to you clinging to me like a lonely koala. You might not be a joke, but you are a true master of comedy.

Your biggest fan,

Leandra

Day ten (morning): Woman, stop complimenting me, I’m trying to be annoyed.

To Bruno,

Have I ever mentioned how beautiful your eyes are when you’re annoyed?

Forever yours,

Leandra

Day ten (night): Crack opened up right in front of me, ran out to the courtyard to ask Casita what had happened. Casita had no clue. Leandra, I know it’ll be pre-coffee when you wake up and read this, but can you ask around to see if anything of note happened last night? Also, your dog is making that weird smell again, it’s worrying the rats.

To Bruno,

I’m just going to write this here, that way we can come back and reference it. The only one who admitted to anything was Camilo, he snuck out to grab a snack and accidentally broke a plate. The poor thing was so worried he was in trouble, maybe the crack happened because he thought he was letting the miracle down. I took him to get a new plate and that seemed to help. Gabriel probably had a bad dream last night, you know how he gets; was extra clingy today, but also didn’t want to let any of the younger kids out of his sight. I’ll admit, I eventually redirected him to Pepa, hopefully it made her feel better to be doted on all day. I asked Julieta outright, since she knows about the cracks, confirmed nothing happened with her, Agustín, or Mirabel (other than the fact that Agustín fell asleep during Mirabel’s turn reading their book, so he slept in the nursery last night). Neither Luisa nor Isabela admitted to anything happening last night, Luisa didn’t seem to be hiding anything, but honestly, who knows with Isabela. Her poker face is pretty damn good. When I asked Dolores, she said “I was reading when it happened” so she definitely knows what’s going on. I’ll follow up with her later. Amada might, as well. But nothing happened with either of our daughters. Asking Pepa was inconclusive, she’s so frustrated with her gift, and going stir crazy that she just sort of unloaded everything. I’m going to organize the kids into getting her another (non-pool related) gift, we’ll see if that affects the cracks.

Love,

Leandra

Day eleven: I have marked and measured each crack, but otherwise left them alone to prepare for your experiment.

To Bruno,

It’ll be two more days, had to give Luisa enough forewarning.

Love,

Leandra

Day twelve: Marked and measured cracks. Going to bed at a reasonable time for once. Would have a much easier time writing this if a certain someone wasn’t leaning half her weight on my shoulders.

To Bruno,

Stop writing and come to bed.

Love, 

Leandra

Day twelve continued: Actually, now might be the perfect time to start writing my memoir. I will title it “My wife just bit me”.

To Bruno,

And I’ll do it again!

That’s a threat and a promise,

Leandra

Day thirteen: More measuring, the experiment is tomorrow, right?

To Bruno,

Considering you wrote that after midnight, knowing I wouldn’t read it until this morning, I have no idea if you meant tomorrow as in today, or tomorrow as in tomorrow. Either way, the kids and I all worked together to bake Pepa a cake. The cake didn’t turn out great, and the frosting melted when Pepa rained on it, but it definitely lifted her mood. Looking forward to reading about the cracks.

Love,

Leandra

Day fourteen: All the cracks I’d measured are gone, but new ones popped up. I am so confused. Going to hold off on taking notes for a while, unless this is helping clear things up for you?

To Bruno,

It is not. This whole thing is weird and makes no sense. I have enjoyed “passing notes” to you though. We don’t get to spend as much time goofing off together as we used to.

Love,

Leandra

Day fifteen: Have officially decided to only take notes if something noteworthy happens that I need you to know about before breakfast. (And yeah, you’re right, there is a distinct lack of goofing off in our lives. Tragic.)

[scribe-cas]

Ohno, it's WBW, and my curiosity about Mr. Profane is not sated. During a post yesterday you mentioned that myth turned into legend and now because people started naming him "The Silent" that he is now explicitly supernaturally quiet. If you would, explain more about how this works, and give me more examples of it happening in your world.

As someone who has been using tumblr for a month at most, I have no idea what WBW is, but if it means questions then i am excited to find out-

OKAY so to explain the “myth makes the legend” thing-

In super simple terms, its a form of manifestation; it happens in the real world, too. Sometimes, if you wish for things, focus on things, associate those things with another thing, then that thing will end up eventually coming true. (Although usually it will not be exactly in the way you imagine it.)

For example, sometimes you’ll be stuck at work, and every day for weeks you’ll sit there and bemoan, “oh, i wish i could go home. Oh i wish i didnt have to do this much work”

And then someone in your family dies. Or you get sick.

I mean, hey-

You suddenly got exactly what you wanted. But it came at a cost.

So, essentially, I’ve applied that to everything in this world, along with mixing it with a bit of folklore that varies from supernatural forces (primarily the state and importance of the true name, and how speaking of something can risk luring it to you, which goes hand in hand with The Silence specifically). :>

It doesn’t always work, it doesn’t always happen, but generally, at least a bit, every collective thought has influence.

With Myths, things are a little different.

You’ve seen jokes about how a horror character can’t kill you if the vibes are right or if you make up arbitrary rules as a kid, then no monsters will get you.

This, on some level, is true. (However, in my world, very few monsters care for children. They’re allowed to pass by easily because they’re simply harmless, although they spot monsters much more often for the exact same reason. They’re harmless. No monster fears what can’t hurt it.)

If someone has complete and utter faith that they won’t be hurt, no guilt to bear, no burden to carry-

Then they’re less likely to be a target.

However, if someone is harboring suspicious feelings, thinking they might get caught (usually, doing something they shouldn’t be)

That negative energy has power. And will more likely than not drag forces to you, because beasts are drawn to it.

Combined with the magic that supernatural forces harbor, this effect is somewhat amplified.

Especially once the written word happened.

Couteau used to be a normal cryptid- and while he could mimic noise, it wasn’t until after people started talking about him, and I quote, “keeping people quiet so that the victims might speak”, that he found he could rid himself of noise just as well as create it.

He technically always had the capability- but no one thinks of it. So the moment it was brought up, he realized, ‘oh’.

‘I can do this.”

And as the myth grew, so did the association between the two, allowing our favorite redhead to go from only quieting his voice

To his footsteps

To his breathing

To the forest

To the air around him

To his very heartbeat.

You can lay your head on his chest, and it won’t make a sound.

Particularly horrifying, considering the Silence itself is 12’4, and Couteau is only 6’6

Can you imagine seeing a 12 foot tall beast and having the air around you go so quiet you’d swear you’re in a void

Can you imagine watching it take a step forward as it looks at you from the body it had just torn up, and you realize that perhaps you’d have heard a scream

If it hadn’t been right there.

And it moves

And not a sound is made

Anyways- the smart locals know not to talk about it. It’s just a thing that lives there, you leave it be. You be polite and courteous and do not mention it by name, lest it be taken as an invitation.

The loud ones have made it a part of Halloween, have exploited the murders for personal gain and turned it into marketing.

And thus, the myth keeps growing.

Hope this helps!! :>

[talesofesther]

It's kinda tough to come in the search of.. unburden, I suppose. I talked to you a little while ago, about some friends and unfortunate things. I wanted to ask, again, how's everthing going.

I am going to use you as my personal... therapist, lol, and take what you said as that I could text here in your requests whenever I needed to, you know, speak about these things.

Things with my best buddy didn't get any better, to be honest.

I still adore them, and I would still kill or be killed for them, but to be honest, knowing that they don't seem to even care at least partially how much I do care for them is dragging me down. Feels almost like a betrayal, you know. I was so careful, building this friendship of mine. Careful of hurting them, of scaring them off, of making them feel comfortable and safe. Turns out, they never seemed to reciprocate those kind of things.

And I am just noticing because I am a clueless idiot. To be honest I've always been kind of.. not dumb, but you know, I just don't take hints haha. I am kind of dumb, actually. It's not even their fault, really, it's mine. That's the worst thing. I could never blame my guy for that. I do love them, still, and I still, as said, would do anything for them. So, guess I have that figured out, even though it still hurts like hell. But to be honest, it's not that bad. It would be worse not to have them at all.

Perhaps they don't adore me as a friend as much as I do adore them, but that's okay. It still brightens my day a little to see them, even if all I can think about is how clear it is that they don't care that much for me, and that I am the blindest person on earth.

About my other friends - haven't talked to them since they haven't talked to me. I am not gonna be the one who runs behind them even when I didn't do anything to deserve this. Not anymore. Not me asking what's wrong, what did I do, when even I don't know what could I have done. It's not fair that I respect them and love them and they just exclude me of their lives, and like if I am some kind of love sick puppy I go behind them like a dog, tail between it's legs.

Today I got this notice, though, from my grandma. I don't have the best relationship with her. Things have been tough with her. But I love her and respect her.

She told me that uh, my mentor is dying. From cancer. She has a 25cm x 15cm tumour, and little ones spread all across her body. Ironic as it is, it's almost 25th of the month; the day when my great grandmother passed away from cancer. The woman who raised me.

This uh, mentor, she used to coach me. I was an athlete. I started when I was 3 years old. I did it for over 10-12 years, with the same woman, going to competitions with her all the time. Now we don't see eachother often, but turns out, I'll never see her again, haha! yeah, go ahead, Mila, joke about your trauma, you lil' asshole.

She is in the hospital right now. Getting treatment. To give her a decent life quality for the time she has left. And I am so, so fucked up. Everything, everything I thought I might have left in the past is just resurfacing right now and I feel so damn stupid cause hell, I can't be that fucking stupid. I don't know how to get over things, and it just makes me feel pathetic. Cause let's be honest, after all, I kind of am.

Everything reminds me of everything and even the slightest thing makes me think and think and think and I feel like I can't breathe. Like if someone has a hold in my heart and is squeezing and squeezing and squeezing and at some point that hold is gonna make it all explode.

My uncle, through my grandma, gave me his backpack to use temporarily yesterday (mine broke and I've been using it anyways for almost a week). That's the closest approach I ever had to him over what? one? two years? I haven't even counted them, to be honest. He abused his wife. My aunt. My grandma made me watch, or well, listen to the audio of the video that she recorded and used in the court after that. He sexually abused her there, and I still can't get over it even if it shouldn't be my place to be mad, but I just can't, because I can't forgive that. That and the fact that it brings me back to times that I don't want to revive. And yet, here we are, and all I can do is go back again and again even if I don't want to.

I can't trust him. Worst thing, is he's been nothing but kind to me all the meanwhile. He used to be my heroe, you know. Someone I loved. Like my father, just that he didn't leave for cigarettes haha! He actually was someone I looked up to. A safe place with my aunt, you know. Someone I trusted, who I actually saw as a father. Even when things got a little hard with my mom he and my aunt would be there. But I just keep going back to my aunt crying, to the own fear I felt when I was in that situation, and when he brushes it off, all I see is a hypocrite. He told me himself of when he hit her. That he knew it wasn't okay. But he never said anything about the other things he did to her.

He used to come home, tell me his version of the story. I felt disgust. Because I, myself, heard the story from my aunt after she reported him.

My grandma didn't stand up for my aunt. She said she would, that what my uncle did was wrong, but first time I said something and laughed bitterly when she defended him she jumped at me. She defends everything and covers him up like if she herself didn't make me listen to that freaking video after she took me outside crying to tell me that her son was a abuser. Of his own wife.

Everything just bottles up and I don't know how to let go.

My mother told me she would talk to me when she is home and I am kind of scared she is gonna kick me out of the house again and I am so, so tired of everything. But it's okay. I'll get out of this.

Guess I just need to put all my shit together, get a job and keep going. It's not like she has the balls to kick me out of the house. Right? my birthday is close though! another day closer to death, yay 👹👹!! and I'm also getting a drivers license, courtesy of my grandma! she always gave the best gifts, even if she sometimes is.. well. You know, family. Everything's gonna be just fine. Everything's gonna get better, I'll just work and try everything I can (that is, if someone finally hires me cause damn, I've been loking for a job for months). I can do this. Or at least, I hope so.

Well, I'm not feeling like if I am going to explode now! I mean still I do, kind of, but not as much, even it it's still there. Guess talking about this really helps after all! have a good night, pal. You know, you don't have to answer. You can just leave this hanging around if you wish, or delete it. It's not a big deal, you don't need to bother yourself with this kind of stuff after how kind and attentive you've been. Take care!

Hello, honey, I'm sorry I took a while to answer you, it's been a busy few days.

But let me tell you one thing first, I wish with all my heart that I could give you a hug right now, genuinely, I just want to hold you and tell you everything is gonna be okay. So imagine I'm giving you a big hug right now, okay? <3

This situation with your friends genuinely breaks my heart, because I've been there, I know how you feel. I've had, and still have, so many friendship that meant the world to me, only for me to realize later that I'm just an afterthought to them. And it hurts, it hurts a lot. There's nothing worse than loving someone and feeling like not even a fraction of that love is being returned to you.

I'm sorry this is happening to you, honestly no one should have to go through something like that. Friendships are not meant to hurt. But I know that, eventually, you'll find someone who appreciates you the way you deserve.

I'm also so sorry about your mentor, I've lost family to cancer and it is such a horrible disease, it's something I wouldn't wish for anyone to go through. Again, feel yourself hugged by me.

And about your uncle. For me, that kind of thing is simply unforgivable, nothing less. I would never be able to see past it. So don't feel bad if you can't forgive him either, and don't feel bad for feeling disgusted at what he did; any sensible person would feel disgusted. It is not your obligation to forgive him, much less accept what he did. Though I understand the struggle, especially if he was someone you looked up to. I'm so sorry you're going through this.

Lastly, you're not dumb, you're not pathetic. You're someone who's going through so much shit they don't deserve to go through, and yet you're doing a damn good job of handling it.

Everything will get better, I promise you.

As always sweetheart, I'm here whenever you need to talk. Know that there's someone out there who cares about you and loves you very much; and that's me. <3

[valley9irl9limmer]

VALLEY 9IRL TIMES ୧₊˚

ENTRY 03.🏹

Dear girlbloggers,

I’m back, did you miss me? Due to my very active and busy day yesterday I may have ruined my blogging streak. So this counts for two days! Congrats <3

Today’s topic of choice is crushes, specifically how horribly my cis-male white ones end. Now dear reader, I will disclose to you something not even my very own parents know—I’m gay. What type of gay? We have yet to figure out, but I’ve been through all the labels and none fit, so let’s do a little thing of not confining ourselves to colonialist tags that do nothing but box us in.

Back to the main topic at hand, as of this passing year I’ve liked 20+ men, and it’s very hard to keep track but the last few are the most important so I’ll emphasize that.

Income J. J is your standard all American guy. Blue eyes and tan skin. The smile is killer and the jokes make me laugh…sometimes. Recently he’s gotten into a relationship with someone I’ve deemed the Voldemort of the our school and the downfall of the human race. She’s white, has a horrible personality, and is an active bully, not to mention she doesn’t hold a candle to me.

It makes me beg the question…was I not good enough? Which makes me beg another question. Since when was he good enough for me to question my worth? He wasn’t. Leading me to the conclusion that I need to do one thing, STAND TF UP.

I’m embarrassing myself for a mid white boy who couldn’t find the clit if I gave him a map or make me swoon like Farmer George if he put his whole being into it.

Onto Exhibit B, E. E was my type down to the fat ass and full lips. He was bad. B-A-D. But when my friend told me he liked her, I eventually realized I wasn’t even on his radar. He couldn’t recognize beauty if I had a sign with the word written stapled to my forehead. Not to mention he had this weird thing against me. I mean any time I spoke he practically blew up. He was brimming with insecurity and I had to ask myself again, was he worth it? What exactly had me desperately clinging to men that didn’t want me—sub-par men at that.

It is now I realize (and hope it’s true) that white America and it’s Eurocentric standards have brainwashed me. I’m going coo-coo for guys who wouldn’t even go out of the way to arrange me a vase of flowers and opt out for hideous and poorly put together poor ones. These days guys don’t write girls love letters—especially not the mid ones with blue eyes and toxic masculinity seeping out their pores. This my friends is what happens to dreamers. It doesn’t help that I’m a Pisces because that led to my FSITIFMIDDTLTAOLMHB.

Fantastizing so itense that I find myself in deep delusion that leads to an obsession leaving my heart broken.

And that heartbreak hurts. Bad.

Anyways my fellow girlbloggers let me lead by example, do better please. He’s no Vinnie Hacker or Nakamoto Yuta or Aaron Taylor Johnson or Luka Sabbat or that one dilf from the last of us. He’s simply not worth it. Fall in love sparingly and get over him quickly. The more options you run through, the quicker you’ll find your Romeo with VERY deep pockets. (Except he didn’t used to date your cousin and wasn’t toxically in love with you because you were pretty at like 12.)

Xoxo, valley9irl9limmer

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

072 of 2025

Where were your parents born?

In the same place as me I guess, but their families come from two neighbouring districts, Nieuwpoort and Middelkerke.

Have you ever used public transportation to get to work?

Yeah, every two weeks. Just reminded me that I'll have to get to work by bus the whole next week. Meh.

Who in your family has the coolest job?

Me, no doubts. :P I build trains. Except that, my sister (she's a music teacher and sings in the choir), and my dad, a retired national railways worker. My mum worked in candy factory and then in sparkling drinks factory, which is cool, too.

Have you found your first gray hairs yet?

No, surprisingly not. But my parents started getting grey late as well.

What is your favorite food to put gravy on?

I don't put gravy on anything.

Do you know anyone from Canada?

Actually, I know a lot of Canadians online. It seems to me that Canadians are prevalent in online spaces, but that's cool because Canadian people are cool.

What’s your opinion on astrology?

Meh. I have hard time believing in it.

Do you use TikTok?

Nope. Never was, never will. It's rotten.

Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?

No. A bit too young.

Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?

No preference. If I like you, then I like you.

Are you good at hiding your feelings?

I don't even think about it, let people estimate if I do or not.

Can you drive a stick shift?

I can't drive at all.

Do you care if people talk badly about you?

No. People will always have opinions.

Are you going out of town soon?

Yes, probably at Monday.

Does anyone hate you?

How should I know, not openly.

Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?

I'm not planning on divorce, so yeah, on my side it's yes.

Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?

I was married for a few years already.

What’s the best part about school?

That I graduated years ago.

Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?

I don't have Facebook.

Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school?

I did sometimes when I was actually in school.

Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive?

He's my dad.

Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

Yes. I've been always dad's favourite, but my relationship with my mum has improved a lot in recent years.

How do you want to die?

I want to be immortal okay.

When was your last physical fight?

Meh.

Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

As a teenager. Can't imagine doing it now.

Ever made out in the bathroom?

No, our bathroom is too small and I don't do it in public places.

Are you scared of spiders?

Not at all.

What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

Physics, biology, chemistry.

Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

No, I haven't.

Do you have trust issues?

I think I answered it today or yesterday already.

Favourite food?

That I answered as well; rice with veggies and chicken-based waterzooi.

Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

I answered this one already, too.

Is cheating ever okay?

No, it's not. Being drunk or lonely is not an excuse.

What makes you happy?

Cats, the sea, my family, sunny weather, thunderstorms, seeing flowers and rainbows and all, the sound of cat purring, cheetahs (I would love to interact with a cheetah once! They're so friendly), random acts of kindness, when everything goes just right, new headphones that work without problems and have great sound quality, music, British TV, Polish TV, freshly cooked soups, personal accomplishments, how the house looks different after cleaning.

Is there anyone you would die for?

I don't think so.

What’s the best news you’ve gotten lately?

Can't think of any.

^And, the worst?

My dad got diagnosed with cancer.

Do you like getting dressed up?

Nah. I like having it prepared in advance.

Would you be embarrassed to find out you snored loudly in public?

Lol yeah. One day Niels was trying to trick me into it, but he was actually joking. It was my husband's idea anyway.

Are you reading any books at the moment?

Yes, and I'm planning more. Currently Luz Maria by Delia Fiallo.

When was the last time you had a tick on you?

Very long time ago. Probably when I was still working abroad.

Have you been to the Grand Canyon?

Never been to the US at all.

Do you like grapes or raisins better?

Grapes, if ever. Raisins are disgusting.

What is the picture on the desktop on the computer you’re using?

A photo of my beloved late cat Victoria. I miss her so much.

Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

A few times. Feels similar to a seizure, honestly. Except that it can happen to a perfectly healthy person and it's not dangerous at all.

Do you believe in ghosts?

Meh.

Would you ever stay overnight in a haunted house?

I don't believe in such things.

When was the last time you had an injection? What for?

3 years ago, I had heparine injections every 12 hours in the hospital.

Is there anything you cannot wait to be over?

My dad's illness, I want him to come back to health.

What was the last thing you had done at the dentist?

Probably filling.

Does your best girlfriend have any talents that you don’t?

I can't say for sure.

What color eyes does the last person you kissed have?

Hazel.

Did your parents ever read stories to you before bed?

No, but my grandma was telling me stories.

What are you listening to?

There's TV in the background again.

Do you like hickeys?

Nah.

Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?

WTF why would I.

Do you have any summer plans yet?

Not yet, but I hope to go to Poland again.

Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?

Yeah, once. When my cat passed away.

Are most of your friends guys or girls?

Guys, but there's no difference for me.

Who do you text the most?

My dad.

Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?

Well, my husband has a son and yet we're married, so his son is my stepson. Go figure.

Do you miss your last sweetie?

Pff.

Do you know anyone who is pregnant right now?

Yes, Chelsea. She's gonna have a girl.

What’s your favorite alcoholic beverage?

Lambic beer and white wine.

Do you play any games on your phone?

Yes, I have quite a few. Mostly sorting games and word games as I'm trying to impreve my verbal skills.

Have you ever shaved your face?

Yeah, even today. I'd rather shave that let others see my pathetic facial hair. I wish I could grow a decent beard, though.

What was the last vaccination you got?

Probably covid a few years ago.

Do you have a brother?

No, I don't. I always wanted an older brother.

Would you ever have a bird as a pet?

Sure, why not. But it's quite risky as I have a cat. Not like she's a born hunter lol.

Have you ever had to speak at a funeral?

Thankfully not. I don't think I would handle it.

When was the last time you saw your father?

At Christmas. You can see his health declined.

Any time when you need to search something on the Internet, which search engine do you use?

Google. Yeah I'm default.

Do you believe in saving your virginity for marriage or no?

I wasn't a virgin when I got married, and in general, you do you. People have a choice and I'm not the one to judge their decisions.

When you open your web browser, what is your home page set to? Why did you select this?

Just a default Opera page. I didn't set it obviously, I just can't be arsed to change it at all.

[tusswrites]

I’M BACK

I meant to send a continuation of the arranged married idea yesterday but I felt like shit so I did not and now I’ve forgotten most of it so we’re big time winging this my friend

So where did we get to?

Right, you’ve had a meeting with both of them and are even more against marrying either, yet you know you have to marry someone.

So what do you do? You go to your best friend, one Mr Yoon Jeonghan and beg him to marry you instead. He doesn’t even laugh at the absurd suggestion, but he does get that dumbass sly smirk he gets when he has an idea and you already regret asking him. But instead of doing something obscenely ridiculous like you know he likes to, he just tells you that you need to win him over; by taking him on an extravagant date this Friday at his favourite restaurant where he expects you to give him a 5k word essay on why he should marry you. Which, actually, is still ridiculous but you know he could ask for worse so you just agree.

When you sit down to start your essay, you realise that you don’t know what to write. How are you supposed to sell yourself to your best friend of over a decade? He knows so much about you already. He knows what it’s like living with you from that time when his ex-kicked him out in the middle of the night and you took him in- then he refused to leave for four months just because he’s Jeonghan and likes to do whatever he wants. And you honestly don’t think married life would be that much different from when you lived together, especially as it’d be a marriage of convenience and not love that is past platonic.

As you sit there though, you realise that one thing you and Jeonghan don’t discuss is your family, either of your families even if you know them. You’ve always had a silent agreement that neither of you want to discuss business or want your friendship to be about your families so you don’t ever talk about it. Of course, you do know stuff about one another’s families because it’s impossible not to in the circles you were raised in, but you don’t know details.

So you write a 5k essay essentially on your family and what he would be marrying into; the benefits and how your families would be united and blah blah blah. (yes I got distracted while writing this part and forgot where I was going with that exactly)

Anyway, on Friday, you dress up all pretty for the date at the semi fancy restaurant and meet Jeonghan there, get seated and Jeonghan just grins at you slyly the whole time while refusing to interact with the staff and expecting you to wine and dine him. You know him well enough to be able to order for your both without hesitation and then you hand him a little jewellery box. He lights up and opens it and laughs at the cheap, flower hair slide inside. A little point of you both sticking to his “flowers just die before the date is over” thought and the ongoing joke of you two always getting each other stupidly cheap gifts because money doesn’t really mean anything to either of you so neither of you are impressed by expensive things at this point.

It's a normal date for the most part, just talking over food even if it’s honestly more like any other dinner between the two of you without any romance in the air. So when Jeonghan asks for the essay you hand it over and let him read it right there as you work on feeding you both the dessert you got to share.

“What the fuck is this?” he asks when he’s done reading, giving you an amused look. “Are you trying to get me to buy into the company or marry you? Is this a marriage or business deal?” And it makes you realise that you’ve essentially done exactly what Wonwoo did to you and your smug bastard of a best friend knows it.

He calls you Mrs Jeon for the rest of the night, leading to you driving him home earlier than intended while he just cackles with his cheap hair slide proudly in his hair and getting cheap glitter over his expensive silk shirt.

A few days pass and you decide that you are definitely not going to marry your best friend and instead you make another meeting with Wonwoo and Seokmin, together this time.

The three of you technically have known each other since childhood and even used to be friends in the way kids tend to be when they spend a fair amount of time together. But you all grew up and grew apart, and you realised you can’t stand either of them.

It’s the first time the three of you have been together since childhood and it shows, it’s very awkward and both men clearly know that they’re competing for your hand based on the tension.

What happens is you essentially tell them both that you have no desire to marry either of them but don’t have a choice but to pick one to spend the rest of your life with.

Wonwoo just nods whereas Seokmin looks a little upset, as if he really thought you’d want to marry him and hadn’t considered otherwise. He even poutily reminds you of how much fun your date was, which leads you to pointing out that your favourite part was the end when you got to leave. As you explain to Seokmin that you don’t like all the noise and high energy of the date, or that he shows in general, Wonwoo sits with a smugass smirk on his lips.

Of course, once you’re done talking to Seokmin, you turn on Wonwoo and wipe that smirk from his face by telling him how he is the dullest man you’ve ever met and you can’t imagine how anyone would want to marry someone who sees everything as a business deal. Which makes Seokmin cheer up a bit now that he’s not the only one getting verbally torn apart and bluntly told how things stand.

Once again, you remind them that you have to pick between them so you want them each to take into account what you’ve said and try again to convince you that they would be the better husband for you. Otherwise you’re just going to flip a coin and then neither can brag that they were actually picked.

Now how exactly do the men try to convince you? Well that is a story for another day :))

…that was not where I expected this to go ngl and this came out longer than intended so oops, apologies for rambling in your ask box bby but I do not apologise for returning to torment you further 💗

I FINALLY FOUND A WAY TO REPLY TO THIS ASK.. lol all i had to do was log in to my lap.. who knew

Jeonghan making Y/N write a 5k essay .. how very Jeonghan of him.. as for Y/N having to choose between Wonwoo and Seokmin.. atp I am growing livid I wanna know where this ends.. safe to say i'd like to add JEonghan to the harem.. because why not complicate things further

[midwesternorcprincess]

i feel like i've gotten so much better at interacting with people and being, by my standards, gregarious. not all the time. there are still tons of situations where i still feel horribly unable to break in anywhere. which feels bad, but even then i don't FEEL shy and nervous in the way that i used to. used to be i couldn't hardly say a word to anybody and was so distressed and avoidant toward so many social situations, the kinda kid that was too afraid to order at restaurants, etc

the first time i remember a change, i was in my early 20s, was somewhere with my family and made a light joke to the person we were talking to. i did this naturally, without thinking of it, and my mom told me later how surprised she'd been. so i don't know how the change started. this was in my horrible four-years-off-from-school era where i wasn't doing shit, a pretty low point in my life. i've joked that after such long and intense isolation from most other people, i reverted to a sort of penguin-like state, you know how penguins lived isolated from humans for so long that they never developed a fear of them like most other wildlife. because i went from having really debilitating social anxiety to being like, fine

i had had to quit school over this and then i came back and really flourished there and am continuing to do so several years later. i teach, something i never in my life would have dreamed i'd be able to do, and i'm fine. it's not like 'playacting social skills because i have to' either, like a lot of other autistics say they feel like they're doing, either. i've found i genuinely enjoy the chance to strike up conversation with someone. i went to a ren faire for the first time yesterday and this happened a few times, where i'd chat with a vendor or someone in line or something and it would turn into them giving me a lot of useful information and advice and i felt like i'd made a connection. like i'd finally leveled up personality and passed a speechcraft check. that's what prompted me to think about this again, although in hindsight i can see a lot of such improvements in the last few years

so i wonder if i can get my new skill into wider use to cover the other kinds of social situations where i still feel like i don't have a good handle on things. i'm trying to figure out the patterns for where things go well for me. i think group size and dynamic is an obvious one. i do well with like one-on-one-or-two interactions, much, much worse in medium-sized groups, and then i go up to being fine, if not particularly enjoying myself, if i have to address a large group, like in teaching or giving a presentation or something. i think my trouble is i feel like i have a hard time "competing" for attention in those medium-sized groups, like i tend to feel invisible and like i don't have things worth saying. i will have to think on this.

but anyway i like people and i feel good when i have pleasant interactions with them and i like making them happen. so all this recently has made me feel good (even a pleasant little interaction with a bus driver the other day). i will never be the life of the party and i'm not interested in being; everyone still universally describes me as mysterious and having subdued energy. that is true of me and i'm okay with that. but, you know. it's cool to observe myself improving at a major weakness over the course of my life