#anyway can't wait to spend my first day of work in a month thinking about watching s3e6 when i get home

[altruistic-meme]

one of the things i'm so nervous about with s3e6 is that i 100% don't think we're going to get to see the rest of the "break up" conversation between wilhelm and simon. which means the start of the episode will have us all being super tense to know what actually happened and where they stand.

because that's the way the show works. it's a pattern. whenever we get an episode ending with any kind of cliffhanger, the next episode doesn't start with that same scene, it is always a later scene and we sometimes get explanations in that scene, and we sometimes get them even later, and we sometimes never get an explanation at all.

s1e1 -> s1e2: they lean towards each other at the party. the next episode begins with the on the table scene. did they kiss??? no, but we don't learn that until the end of s1e2.

s1e2 -> s1e3: they kiss. the next episode begins 3 days later. what happened after the kiss??? we never learn.

s1e5 -> s1e6: the video gets leaked. the next episode begins with Wilhelm and Simon in their own rooms. did Wilhelm tell Simon at the event??? we never learn.

s2e4 -> s2e5: Wilhelm and Simon kiss at the ball. the next episode begins with them both thinking about each other. did Simon still go to Marcus' house like planned??? no, we learn later in the episode.

s2e6 -> s3e1: Wilhelm's speech and Sara calling the police. the next episode begins with the legal negotiations. what was the immediate fallout of both the speech and the police report??? we never learn.

s3e4 -> s3e5: Wilhelm and August talking about Erik. the next episode begins with Wilhelm walking through the Palace. did they actually talk in therapy??? did they discuss Erik at all after this??? no, i don't think so, but we aren't actually ever told.

these are some of the more obvious examples i could quickly remember. but they make up my point nonetheless. the only times i can remember us getting any kind of immediate following scene are:

s1e4 -> s1e5: with Wilmon still in bed together. (but this ignores the whole August side-plot of the end of s1e4 which isn't acknowledged again until later in the episode, so it only mostly counts)

s2e3 -> s2e4: probably the MOST direct following scene despite how short it is. Wilhelm texting Felice that he doesn't think Henry will tell anyone.

s2e5 -> s2e6: similar to the s1 one, Wilmon are still together in Wilhelm's room.

so yeah. i'm nervous because i truly don't think that s3e6 is going to start where s3e5 left off. so we're going to walk into the episode with NO IDEA where Wilmon stand with each other, and that is, I think, the scariest part of this whole thing.

[seafoam-taide]

You know I thought for awhile that I was just a rare type of person who sure, liked people well enough but was okay being alone didn't necessarily need anyone and NO. NO. NO. OH MY GOD . YOU GIANT DUMBASS. NO HAHAHA NOOO NOPE

[leashybebes]

this isn't quite a fix-it, but it opens the door to fix it. also i have had a real shitty week for a whole host of reasons and i'm getting out my sads. sorry!

Tommy drives away from Evan's - Buck's - the loft - for the last time feeling like he's been gutted. Liked he's gutting himself. He has to pull over at one point just to breathe, just so that if he's not driving he can't pull a highly illegal u-turn in the middle of the road and go back. 

The first voicemail is on his phone by the time he gets home. For a long, wavering moment, he thinks he isn't going to listen to it, but it never really feels like an option. In the cab of his truck, Tommy hits play. The message is thirteen seconds of silence, an inhale, and the dial tone. Tommy listens to it three times, turns the volume all the way up, blocks his other ear. 

It's just silence.

Everything is just silence.

—

The second message comes three days later, sometime during his shift, when he'd voluntarily benched himself for the first time in years, spent the day doing maintenance, his phone tucked away in his locker so he can stop feeling stupid for reflexively checking it every five minutes. Two weeks from now, he won't know Evan's schedule, but right now he knows he's on shift and part of him can't help anticipating those regular little updates. He knows they won't come - in his head he knows it, but his stupid, cowardly, aching heart is taking a minute to get with the programme.

That same stupid heart leaps when he sees the notification at the end of his shift. It plummets again quick enough, because he knows - he blew it all up so severely there's no way the message can be anything other than anger or practicalities, so he waits until he gets home to listen to it. It's not much longer than the silent one from the other day, but it's so much worse.

"I'm gonna send Eddie over with your stuff. Can you give him my things, please."

It sounds flat, rehearsed, awful. Tommy tells himself he doesn't have the right to feel sad, lets his eyes slide away from the bottle of scotch in the cupboard and goes for a late night drive instead.

When he gets home, he gathers the stuff Evan had left around over the course of the last six months - clothes, a phone charger, aftershave. He packs them into a box with his key to the loft, thinking about how he never used it unless he got there before Evan, thinking about all the lines he drew without even realising it. He tucks his heating pad in between two of Evan's shirts - Tommy doesn't get much use out of it anyway, and Evan always loved it on days when his leg flared up. Hopefully they can write it off as an oversight on his part, but he wants Evan to have it.

The conversation with Eddie is painfully awkward. Tommy doesn't dare to ask how Evan is doing, and Eddie doesn't need to ask Tommy how he is; it's written all over his face. He hasn't been sleeping, hasn't been working out. He hasn't been drinking either, but only because his self-imposed rules about when he's allowed to drink forbid it.

"Don't be a stranger," Eddie says as he's leaving. 

Tommy knows he will be. Enough time, enough distance, and he'll be a stranger to them all all over again. He'll be a memory for Evan for a while, but give it long enough, and he'll be a memory he doesn't remember. It'll be okay. It'll all be okay.

—

The third message comes a few weeks later. Tommy's out on another aimless drive - he doesn't love spending time at home anymore. He knows it'll get better, but for now, he's spending pretty much all his waking hours in his car, at the gym, and at work. Like the very first message, he stays in the cab of the truck when he listens to this one. He's glad he managed to put off listening until he got home because this - this is the one that devastates him.

"Hey, Tommy. It's Evan. Well, Buck, I guess."

Evan's drunk, and Tommy should stop listening to the message right now, for his own sanity, and for Evan's dignity come the morning. But his voice…

"I'm real glad I didn't break your heart, Tommy." It sounds mean, sharp, so un-Evan, but it's followed by a silence, and then, "I am. I actually am." There's another silence, a sniffle. "Wish you didn't break mine, but… whatever. Be safe, Tommy."

In the cab of his truck, clasping his phone so hard he's distantly a little worried he might crack the screen, Tommy cries for the first time.

—

There's a month and a half of silence after that, and he hopes that means Evan is moving on. Tommy gets back home from a failed attempt to visit an old hook-up spot and get out of his head for the night. He's had a few drinks because it didn't break the rules (it wasn't a bad shift, he wasn't alone and okay, yes, he's sad, but if he sticks religiously to that rule he might never know the simple pleasure of a cold beer ever again), but he's not drunk enough for it to cushion the blow when he flops down on his cold bed and hits play.

"Hey, uh. Happy birthday, Tommy. I hope you had a good day."

He didn't.

—

A month later.

"I went on a date tonight. It was with a woman though, so I'm gonna guess I'm still not queer the right way for you, huh? Fuck you, Tommy. My date fucking sucked."

Tommy feels about two feet tall, and like that's exactly how he deserves to feel. His thumb hovers over the block button for less than a second - he owes Evan the outlet, and that awful, scared little masochist that lives in the heart of him won't turn down the opportunity to let Evan's voice claw at him every chance he gets.

—

He tells himself he's not going to listen to the next message that comes through, but he's briefly very glad he does.

"Hey, Tommy. I wanted you to know - Maddie and Chim are having another baby. It's past three months so they're telling people now. I, uh - I just wanted you to know. Um." Abruptly, Evan sounds on the verge of tears. "I miss you, you dick. I wanted that with you. Fuck."

And then he's back to feeling crushed. It wouldn't have worked out. It wouldn't have. But he's sorry that Evan's still hurting. His own hurt is - it's just the baseline of his existence turned up a little louder than usual. It'll pass.

He tells himself that every day, every hour, every minute. It'll pass, it'll pass, it'll pass.

Howie texts him the same news later that day. Tommy thinks the message he sends back is perfectly normal, but Howie shows up at his door that night with a six pack of beer and that annoyingly perceptive air about him that makes Tommy feel seen and unsafe in the exact same way it has since the day they met.

The first beer, they talk about the pregnancy in light ways. Howie's excited. Maddie's perfect. Jee's ecstatic. Tommy's happy for them.

The second beer, Howie talks about how scared he is. How they have set ground rules and they're sticking to them, but he's walking through the world with a little core of fear inside him. Tommy almost cries.

The third beer, Howie asks how he's doing. Tommy does cry. Just a little, and he turns his face away quick enough that Howie doesn't see. He still knows, though.

"He leaves me these voicemails," Tommy says, and he sounds wrecked even to his own ears. "I know I don't - I don't have the right to miss him, but it - "

"Tommy."

"It hurts, Howie."

"I know, bud," Howie says, his hand on the back of Tommy's neck, a rough squeeze.. "I know."

—

The next message is the beginning of the end of it all. Tommy's actually had a - not terrible day. He flew four times, the sky was perfect, the calls went well. They had really good tacos for lunch at the station. 

The message is waiting for him when he gets home. Evan sounds - subdued.

"Hey, Tommy. Listen, I'm gonna - I'm gonna stop calling. I'm - you hurt me. You really, really hurt me. But I think I might be hurting you too, still, and I hate that, even if I'm mad at you. I'm really mad at you, and I think - I think I'm just gonna stay mad at you unless something changes. So I'd - I'd like to see you. Talk. Say - some things. Say goodbye. It's okay if you don't want to. But I'd like to. Let me know if you wanna. And if not, then, I don't know. Bye, I guess."

Bye, I guess. 

Tommy hesitates for less time than he'd like to admit. Maybe he can just ignore this one like he has all the others (is ignore the right word if they have become the constant background soundtrack to his waking hours and woven themselves into his dreams?) and Evan will be as good as his word - stop calling, stay mad, hate Tommy, but move on from him.

But it's Evan, and he's asking for something from Tommy, and the one and only time Tommy turned him down for something he really wanted, he hurt them both so bad. The least he owes Evan - the very least - is closure. And if it drives the shards of heartbreak deeper into Tommy then, hey, whatever, he's pretty sure those shards are a feature not a bug, by this point.

He navigates to their message thread, carefully doesn't look at the most recent communications - a silly joke, a heart, a can't wait to see you - and tries to find the words to reply.

—

It's not somewhere they've ever been before, and Tommy feels like that was probably deliberate on Evan's part. Still, the scene is so familiar it makes Tommy's steps falter. Evan, at a table in the sunshine, two coffee cups in front of him. He looks beautiful. He looks nervous. He looks tired. He's chosen a table away from any of the other patrons.

Part of Tommy wants to run. The rest of him knows he owes Evan the bravery he couldn't give him all those months ago, and he approaches the table, hands in his pockets.

Evan looks up, smiles like it's a reflex, but it falls away from his face like he's remembered he's mad at Tommy.

"Thanks for coming."

Tommy shrugs. "Of course."

[im4rmy]

your first time together - chenle (idol AU)

IMAGINE: he picks you up after your match and he's a sucker for your volleyball jersey.

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶ ︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶ ︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶ ︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

• "hi baby! how are you?"

• chenle couldn't even answer because you barged in his car with your fucking jersey on, white knee-socks and that damn ponytail.

• "you didn't c-change your clothes?" "oh- sorry, when you texted me about tonight i was already at the gym and i didn't have spare clothes with me... is this a problem? do i smell bad?"

• chenle laughed and leaned towards you to leave a soft peck on your lips. "no, you're perfect"

• he took a deep breath turning on the engine and trying to ignore his raging and sudden boner.

• you and him were dating for a month now and you did something... you were equally non-virgin but on the low-experience side, so you two had fun with A LOT of foreplay. but not sex yet.

• "sorry to not be able to watch the match, practice took longer than we expected" "it's okay, we won even without our favourite fanboy"

• while you started to yap about the match, chenle drove to the drive-through to get your dinner. no fancy restaurant tonight and you noticed he was more quiet than usual.

• you waited for him to park in a deserted parking lot before speaking. "what's wrong?" "mh?"

• "you're not talking" "that's because i'm listening"

• you scoffed and took a bite of your cheeseburger. "are you mad at me for something?"

• chenle almost chocked on his food before looking at you. "no! why?" "BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT TALKING CHENLE"

• he flinches and watches you with big eyes, but then he snorts and relax against the car seat in defeat. "you got me a boner"

• you look down at his pants and then up at his face. "how did i do it?" "your jersey" "ah, got it. mh can i finish my burger first?" "of course"

• you two dive into your dinner chatting as usual, with him shifting in his seat every once in a while, but the moment you wipe your mouth after finishing your well deserved meal- he's on you, smashing his lips on yours and holding you by gripping the back of your head.

• you laugh and push yourself on top of him, straddling his lap while he pulls his seat all the way back to make room for you. you pull up his hoodie and take it off, drooling over his arms and starting to massage them.

• he smiles knowingly and flexes them, making you laugh. "what will it be tonight?" "i was thinking that maybe tonight can be the night"

• you look at him in disbelief. "you can't be serious" "oh- i'm sorry. i didn't want to-"

• "you're telling me-" "y/n i'm sorry, i didn't mean-" "i'm speaking"

• you shut him up putting a finger on his mouth. "you're telling me that the first time i don't stand in front of my closet for an hour and don't spend the entire day putting my make-up on and doing my hair to look my best for your expensive ass- the first time i look like THIS and we're in a fucking car... YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH ME?"

• he looks up at you with big and shocked eyes and nods. you scoff. "you're something else, i swear"

• he flashes you one of his wonderful smiles and you can't keep a straight face anymore. you shake your head and start to kiss him again lowkey grinding on him.

• he growls and takes a hold of your waist to press you down on him more. "shit. c-can you take off only your pants?"

• "do you really want to fuck me only in my jersey top?" "and the knee-socks, yes please"

• you snort and bite his lower lip, making him moan, but then you satisfy him anyway, taking off your shorts as less clumsly as possible in that position.

• chenle doesn't think about it twice and sneaks his hands in your wet panties making you mewl in pleasure. he watches you shamelessly riding his fingers while holding his shoulders for stability. "you're gorgeous"

• you open your eyes and look at him: he's insanely handsome and you can see the honesty in his gaze, the excitement and the love you know he feels towards you. you kiss him deeply, distracting him from his work between your legs.

• and while he's lost in your soft tongue, your hands find the zip of his jeans and pull it down. you free his still hard boner by lowering his boxer just enough.

• you hear him take a deep breath to calm himself down and you smile, caressing his cheek. "are you alright?" "it's you... of course"

• then you move aside your underwear and finally sit on him, making both of you gasp loudly at the contact. you start to ride him slowly to be able to feel him properly.

• he holds your sides and then your thighs, your arms, your hands, your breasts under your jersey, your ass... he's everywhere, you feel him in you, under your skin, in your mouth. you're overwhelmed with pleasure.

• neither of you speaks, you both just moan and whimper and sigh and curse under your breath, until the windows of the car start to fog.

• you feel your orgasm approach and you increase the pace of your pelvis and you feel chenle shaking under you. "oh- god. y/n i'm- shit"

• you meet his hips one last time before feeling him twitch inside of your clenching walls and you cum together, holding each other tightly.

• "wow" "i agree"

• you melt on his chest and hide your face in the crook of his neck.

• "you'll never come again to one of my game" "that's called cruelty and i'm against violence, you should know that"

♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤

masterlist

Taglist: @carelessshootanonymous

♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Hey Derin, can I ask you a question or two about publishing? (If no, close your eyes for the next bit and click near where you remember the delete button was.)

I'm writing something with the dream of publishing it one day and I'm considering all avenues at this stage. What led you to publishing serially online? What are the pros of your experience doing that?

Asking you because I was looking over your site earlier today and thinking about how comfortable a place the internet feels - less of a big step than traditional publishing, or even putting out a whole story at once for self-publishing.

I've never pursued trad publishing and have no plans to ever do so, it was immediately obvious that it wasn't for me, so I can't give you like, comparisons. I only even got into indie publishing because my readers were demanding ebooks and paperbacks so I just shrugged and got them made. Sometimes I get asked trad vs. indie publishing questions that I do not have the experience to answer.

This question, though, I can answer. I didn't sit down and go "how should I publish these? Online, or through a trad publisher, or what?" I approached web serial writing directly as a career without considering publishing my writing as books at all; that was never on the radar until the readers wanted them. And the reason I started writing a web serial was simple -- it was a hobby that suited my lifestyle.

I'd written serial fiction before; fanfiction, some r/hfy stuff, just whatever I felt like, and I had a serious problem experienced by many casual writers -- I tended not to finish stuff. The stuff that had never made it to the web was even worse; I had so many novels in progress on my hard drive that I'd gotten to the end of the first act of, before moving onto a new idea. I needed something to do with my time (I'd moved back to my hometown to spend time with my dying grandfather and was unemployed) and posting a web serial with a strict schedule and a patreon seemed like the best way to force myself to actually finish my stories. If a handful of people were giving me a couple of buck a month, I wouldn't be able to just drift off to something else; I'd have to finish the story.

And it worked. I got a new job and wrote Curse Words on my off weeks, then that job ended and my Patreon was paying my new mortgage and suddenly this was just kind of my job now. And then enough people were asking for ebooks and paperbacks that I had to figure out how to make those happen. And this is kind of my life now I guess.

In terms of pros I would say:

Low barrier to entry/small steps of progression: You can just start publishing on a website for free whenever you want. You can make your own website for free and publish on that (I did). It takes five minutes or less to learn how to do and you don't need to buy anything. Your time commitment is mostly Writing The Story, which is presumably what you want to be spending your time on anyway. If you do it for 2 months and decide you hate it? You can stop. No harm, no foul.

No boss: You're beholden to your patrons and nobody else. You can write whatever the fuck you want, wherever the fuck you want, however often you want. The only deadline is the schedule that you yourself set, and you can set it to suit your lifestyle.

Payment model: The patreon/ko-fi sponsorship model is vastly superior, in my opinion, to making money via book sales. There's too many factors involved to really say if you make more or less money on Patreon, but what it has is predictability. Patrons come and go, but slowly. I can predict my monthly income from my supporters to within a hundred dollars or so. This is a massive advantage when you have bills to pay. Book sales surge unpredictably, and while you can bank on things like advances if you go the trad publishing route, these are few and far between.

Time: There are minimal delays in web serial publishing. No waiting months or years at a time for your book to chew through the machinery of a publisher, no long delays as your agent works or contracts are negotiated. Indie publishing is faster but still has far more delays than web serial publishing; most notably, you have to write the entire book first, often with little idea of how well it's going to perform. I don't do well with waiting periods or having to coordinate timing with others, so web serial publishing works best for me.

Marketability: Web serials have a far smaller audience than books, but they're also easier to market to that audience. For one thing, they're usually free, and it's a lot easier to convince someone to try a free story instead of buying one. For another, their one-chapter-at-a-time nature feels like less of a commitment and less intimidating to some people, even though they are traditionally much longer than books tend to be. Also, their chapter-by-chapter nature allows speculation and jokes and fanart and stuff to be spread while the story is still going, which is great marketing, especially when readers end up talking about it far longer than they would talk about a book (because they're reading it chapter-by-chapter for far longer).

But the biggest advantage in marketability is what I call 'rolling weight enthusiasm'.

When you're pushing a cart or something, it takes a lot of effort to get started, but once you're cruising at a consistent speed, you can rely on momentum to do half the work for you. You can build more and more speed with the same effort, because a rolling weight is maintaining that momentum. Writing a web serial is a lot like that; the consistent release schedule means that if you can get people invested, it's much easier to keep them invested, because they're waiting a very short period of time (a few days to a week, depending on your release schedule) to get more of the story. If you're releasing books, there might be more than a year between releases; you can keep a dedicated audience interested for that long, but it's much harder to hold onto the casual readers. There are so, so many book series that I've only read half of because at some point a new book was released and I didn't notice. If you write and publish books, you have to do a big part of the marketing all over again to let people know that the next one is out. Web serials don't have this problem. When's the next chapter out? soon enough that the previous chapter is still fresh in your mind. soon enough that you probably don't have time to finish the fanart this one made you think of.

Immediate feedback: Another great thing about web serials is that you can watch the audience reaction in real time. Not only that but, unlike with a book that people read all at once, you get very detailed feedback specific to each chapter. I don't mean people telling you about the story; reader suggestions and 'constructive criticism' is almost universally useless and can generally be thrown out. If you trust somebody's writing and editing skills enough to take feedback from them, you should ask that person directly; random readers are unlikely to be experts and unlikely to have accurate advice.

Instead, watch them discuss it amongst themselves. What did they get right away, and what are they confused about? what did they react most strongly to; is the dominant emotional reaction to the various characters vaguely in line with what you intended? Check the theories; how well are they predicting future events? (If everyone is guessing the Big Twist, then you need to put more effort into selling it so that it's not a let down; the less surprising a twist is, the better the writing has to be to pull it off. But if nobody is guessing the Big Twist, then you have insufficiently foreshadowed it. You're looking for a very high population of readers being accurate about the information they're expected to have gleaned, and a small population being accurate about twists and stuff, and you want that small population to grow as they get closer to the twist.) Checking these reactions can give you a better idea of what you need to emphasise, clarify, or foreshadow in the text.

[lucy90712]

Can you please make a hector fort fic where he spends all his time with his friends and spends barely time with her. Then they were supposed to go on a date together and she waits for him to pick her up, she waits for 2 hours and goes to social media to see if he has posted anything and sees on his story a picture of him and her girl bestfriend having fun playing games. So she leaves the house with her stuff. When hector comes home he realises what he has done and tries to get back in contact with her but he fails. They don't see each other for a while but he notices her walking on a busy street and tries to talk to her. (ending with fluff please)

You: good morning amor hope training goes well don't forget about our plans tonight I'll be waiting for you 

Hector: have fun in class and don't worry I'll be there at 7 as promised 

You: love you 

That was the last I heard from Hector and now it's 8:32pm and he's still not here to pick me up. He promised he promised me he'd be here and that he'd make up for us not spending any time together. I should've seen it coming as he's been doing this for weeks he's promised time and time again that he will come over or we'll go on a date and then he never shows up. When I can finally get hold of him he always has an excuse either he was busy or with friends and lost track of time but whatever it is it hurts. I've done so much for Hector I've been there for him since we were kids and I've been there for every good and bad moment of his football career but he can't even manage to show up for one day or just to see me for an hour. 

We made the jump from being friends to being a couple just over a year ago and for the longest time he was the best boyfriend ever he treated me so well was super attentive and really made an effort to be romantic and take me on dates. I don't remember exactly when it changed I think it happened slowly over time but ever since he's started playing with the first team more he's been busier with training and matches which I understand but what I don't understand is spending every evening with his teammates who he sees all day when he could see me. It might sound selfish but I just miss my boyfriend he's already missed so much like he wasn't here when I was stressed over my big exams and he wasn't here when I got the results and he wasn't here when I needed him most when my mum went into hospital and I was scared and panicking. Just a few months ago he'd never dream of leaving my side during any of those times but now he barely knows they even happened. 

I text him once then twice then three times then I called multiple times but they all went unanswered. My last resort was to message him on Instagram as I know he won't have turned the notifications off for that but I didn't need to message him Instagram gave me my answer straight away. He had posted on his story showing him out with his friends and my best friend was with them too which was a whole other level of pain. My best friend knows all about my troubles with Hector yet she went out with him and his friends anyway and didn't even bother to tell me. That was the final straw I'm not dealing with this anymore I deserve better I deserve someone who will be there for me, not break promises and definitely not someone who makes me feel like this. 

My mind was racing but I quickly worked out what I wanted to do so I grabbed my keys and got in my car. Seeing as Hector wasn't in I decided now is the perfect time to go and get all the things I have at his place and leave the spare key I have that he gave me ages ago because I won't be needing it anymore. When I opened the door I immediately saw all the little things of mine there are that makes Hector's place feel just like my own some of my books are on his coffee table and my hair ties on the sideboard by the door. I spent some time grabbing all my things while trying not to cry that I was losing my boyfriend who I thought was the love of my life. Before I left I found a piece of paper and a pen and wrote Hector a note to tell him his I felt and why I was leaving and then put my key with it. Closing the door I felt like I was closing a chapter in my life a chapter I never wanted to close and one that's going to stay with me for a long time but it has to be done. 

Hector's POV

As soon as I opened the door to my apartment it felt weirdly empty like was something wrong but the door was locked and nothing looked like it has been stolen. Still I had a quick look around and then I noticed a piece of paper on the kitchen counter. Next to it was a key and that's when I realised what was wrong all of y/n's things were gone her books, her hair ties and all of the little things she leaves here were gone and this is her key that's now in my hand not with her like it should be. I knew the note would be from her but I didn't need to read it to know what was going on and what I'd done. I had promised to see her tonight as I've forgotten about the last few dates we've planned but I did it again my friends dragged me out after training and then I got carried away and forgot about the most important part of my day proving to y/n that I will do better. I really didn't want to read the note but I knew I had to I owe her that at the very least.

Dear Hector, 

I have left my key and taken my things because I'm done. I'm done because tonight we were supposed to go out you promised you'd pick me up at 7 and you promised you wouldn't forget like you have been for the last few months but you did. Instead of trying to prove to me that you love me and that the last few months have just been an anomaly you went out with your friends and my best friend leaving me waiting for you, calling and texting you until I saw your story. I can't do this anymore I love you but I can't let you treat me like this so I'm calling it here. I've really enjoyed the last year or so we've spent together but it's time for us to move on as clearly we aren't meant to be. 

I love you and probably will for the rest of my life but this is goodbye. 

Y/n xx

Those words hurt to read. I already knew I fucked up but to see the words written in front of me made it truly hit me how much I'd hurt her. She was the best thing that ever happened to me she was always there for everything no matter what she's been by my side through every up and down and I truly thought she'd be there for everything for the rest of our lives. I wanted her there for every achievement in my career and I wanted to be there for all of her achievements too. She was the one I didn't need anyone else I didn't want anyone else but now she's left me and I don't have my person anymore and I may never have her again. 

After the initial shock I tried to text her to see if I could apologise but she had already blocked me so I tried Instagram but she had blocked me on there too. I should've seen it coming but it upset me that I wouldn't be able to reach out to her and try and make things right or at least tell her how sorry I am for fucking this all up so badly. She's gone and it's all my fault that's what hurts the most if I hadn't been such an idiot then we'd still be together but no I had to go and ruin things with the best woman in the world. 

A few weeks later

Life has been hell for the last few weeks I've really missed y/n I've missed having her sat in the stands during matches and I've definitely missed seeing her. She's been in my life for the longest time not just as my girlfriend but as my friend so not having her in my life anymore and so suddenly as well has been really hard. I've definitely not been myself all of the guys keep asking if I'm ok and I tell them I am but we all know it's a lie they know how much I love y/n and they can see how it's destroyed me to lose her. I've tried time and time again to reach out to her but of course I'm still blocked I even text her best friend to get her to talk to y/n but she says she hasn't seen her or had any of her texts answered either so I have no way of telling her that I'm sorry. 

Everyone keeps telling me I need to try and move on and they're right it's just hard everything reminds me of y/n whenever I go anywhere I see places that we've been on dates to or just places we have memories at. Today I'm going to stop myself from moping about and go for a walk to clear my head as that's what I think I need to be able to move on or at least start to. I decided to go to the nearest park and walk around as it's relaxing and it should be quiet there which is what I need. 

The park was pretty empty there was a few people around; one couple with their baby an older couple feeding the birds and a girl who was sat on a bench with a book. The girl reminded me of y/n her hair was the same colour and reading in the park is something she loved to do. As I walked closer I realised that it actually was y/n she had headphones in and the book she'd been reading in her hands like she so often did when I went to see her. Seeing her made me stop in my tracks I didn't know whether to go and talk to her or just leave her be but then I realised this is my chance to talk to her and get closure at the very least. 

Your POV

Being without Hector has been hard I've missed feeling his touch and having him next to me when I sleep. So many times I've wanted to take it all back and run back to him but I know I can't or he'll think he can treat me like that again or someone else and I can't let that happen. Today is Wednesday which is the day that I had free from classes and usually I would spend all day with Hector so I've been sat at home all day thinking about him but I can't keep doing that so I needed to get outside. To give me something to do I walked to the park with my book. I found a bench with a nice view of the trees and the little pond with a few ducks and let myself forget about the real world. 

I was so in my own world that I didn't notice when someone sat next to me to start with until they sighed which brought me out of my trance. When I looked to my side I think I turned as white as a ghost because Hector was sat next to me with a look of pure sadness on his face. It took a few seconds for my brain to begin functioning again but when it did I leapt up and tried to run away. I'm not ready to face him again not when I've been trying so hard to forget about him and move on I blocked him and separated myself from him so I wouldn't have to do this. Before I could get more than a few steps away Hector placed a hand on my arm he didn't pull me back he didn't even hold my arm tightly but having his hand on me stopped me dead in my tracks. He encouraged me to sit back down so I did and I watched as his hand moved off my arm down to my hand which he held tightly in his grasp so I couldn't run again. 

"Hector" I started to say 

"No please let me talk" he interrupted 

"Ok but you have five minutes then I'm leaving" I said

"I'm sorry and I know move said that a lot recently but I really mean it when I got home and saw the note you left it broke me having all of your stuff gone from my apartment made it feel empty and not being able to see or talk to you has killed me I've missed you so much and I'll do anything to make it up to you" he said 

"How do I know that you actually mean it and that you'll actually change I told you how disappointed I was a million times and every time you told me you wouldn't forget the next time and then you always did it's like I wasn't important to you anymore how do I know that'll change" I said 

"I know I was an awful boyfriend but losing you has taught me a lot I know I can't treat you like that and I'd never dream of doing it again this might seem to much but you are truly the one for me I don't want to ever be with anyone else so please give me a another chance and I promise I'll do better and if I don't I'll let you go" he said 

"Ok but this is your last chance if you miss any date or anything without telling me and giving me a valid reason we're done" I said 

"I'll never miss a date ever again don't worry" he said 

"I can't lie I'm glad to have you back I've missed you so much it really hurt to walk away" I said

"And you'll never have to walk away again I'm here to stay" he said 

He pulled me into his side and leant down to kiss my lips which felt so good as I've missed having him by my side and I've definitely missed kissing him. He let me sit and finish the chapter I was reading before we left the park and went back to his place as he wanted to make things up to me straight away by having a movie date at home which he knows are my favourite. He's definitely off to a good start at making things up to me but honestly I'm just happy to have him back by my side. 

[writtenbymisunderstoodnerds]

Valentines day (Emily Sonnett x Reader)

I don't really know what this is. The idea randomly came to me so I hope you like it :)

Summary: Emily loves valentines day so despite them being in a fight, Y/n still does something for her.

Warnings- Tiny bit suggestive at the end

Words: 1.8k

---

Emily and I had gotten into a pretty big fight a few days ago. We had barely talked or even see each other since with her staying in the spare room. I was meant to move to be with her, but there was a big project at work that I had to finish before I could. Well, I could have not done the project. It just meant likely missing out on a big promotion with my transfer. Understandably, Emily wasn't very happy about that because it meant a month or two before I could make the move. 

It was valentines day, we still weren't talking, but I wasn't going to not do anything because of that. With how pissed she was at me, she likely hadn't done anything for me, but I didn't care. I didn't care much about the day anyway. Emily loved valentines day though, I wouldn't take that away from her, no matter how annoyed I was.

Although I had to work today, I still wanted to make it as special as possible. Months ago I had made reservations at the fancy restaurant Emily had wanted to try. I didn't know if Emily would come to dinner with me, but I was going to be there to pick her up regardless. Before work, I made Emily her favourite breakfast. She was likely awake so I quietly peeked in the room to find her sitting up, scrolling on her phone. Emily didn't acknowledge me, only looking up when I placed the tray on her lap. I walked back to the door, stopping briefly before leaving. 

"Happy valentines day. I love you."

Just before the door closed I heard a quiet 'I love you'. It was something at least. I hadn't heard that in person since our fight. I would never go that long without telling her I loved her, so I had messaged her at least once a day. Emily always replied, sometimes even messaging me first.

Before leaving, I left flowers in a vase on the counter, making sure to put a fake flower in with it. Every time I got Emily flowers, I would add a fake one in. It had become sort of a tradition after we were messing around in shops one day and I jokingly held up a fake flower, telling her I would love her until it died. I also added a massage/spa voucher, a nail voucher and a letter. It was written before our fight. Everything in it was still true though so I wanted her to read it.

Hi my love, 

Happy valentines day. I want you to know how much you mean to me, not just on Valentine's Day, but every single day. You are my rock, my partner-in-crime, and my favourite person to spend time with. I love you more than words will ever be able to express. 

You bring light into my life in ways I never imagined possible. Your laughter and smile is infectious, it fills me with so much happiness, love, and warmth. Everyday with you is an adventure, filled with love, laughter, goofiness and so much more. Being with you is the happiest I've ever been. I can't wait for the adventures, the boring, the fun and everything else that awaits.  

Unfortunately, I have work to do today, but you deserve to be pampered like the royalty you are. Go enjoy your day getting pampered, then put on something semi fancy and a little sexy ;) I'll pick you up at 6:30. 

I love you more than words can describe <3

P.S I'm going to love you until the last flower dies.

-Y/n

---

Today had probably been one of my least productive days at work. I had spent the entire day thinking about if Emily would actually come to dinner with me. I would convince myself she would, then the doubt would creep in and I would convince myself she would stand me up. 

At 6:30, I was waiting in the living room for Emily. To be honest, I was still half expecting her to not come out. Thankfully, a few minutes later she appeared, wearing a knee length, halter neck red dress with black heels. My eyes roamed over her body, taking in every inch of her. Fuck, she looked incredible. I stood in front of her, not touching her because I wasn't sure where we actually stood. "You look incredible Em."

"Thank you, you look amazing Y/n/n."

I offered my arm, internally smiling when hers looped with mine, "You ready to go?"

"Yeah. Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

Emily was super excited when she saw where we were. Throughout dinner, things were slightly awkward, but we had both seemed to put our fight to the side for now at least. We talked about our days and any light hearted topics we could think of. Even though things were still a bit awkward, I was incredibly happy to be talking again. I did miss touching her though. We were a very touchy couple, especially in private. Normally, there would be arm or leg touches, random kiss or cuddles. Tonight there was only a few minutes of hand holding and a cheek kiss. 

"Thank you for today by the way. I haven't been pampered like that in a long time. You didn't have to make me cry with that letter though."

"You deserve to be pampered Em. You also know I'm better with written words then spoken."

"It was beautiful. I didn't forget or just not do anything by the way. Your gift is just running late, it should be here tomorrow."

"You know I wouldn't care if you didn't get me anything."

"I know, but you deserve to get spoilt as well."

After dinner, we found ourselves walking along the waterfront. We weren't talking or touching, but it was nice regardless. I didn't want to go home still on bad terms with Emily. The fighting was exhausting, I missed my girlfriend and just wanted to finish the night cuddled up with her. So when we came across a bench, I sat down, patting the spot next to me. 

A few minutes of silence passed before I decided to speak up, "I wasn't sure if you would come tonight. Honestly, I was expecting to be stood up."

"We may be fighting, but I wouldn't miss this for the world Y/n/n. I know you. Which means I know you thought about this and booked this months in advance. I know you put a lot of thought into valentines day because you know I like it. You put so much effort into this for me, I love you too much to just disregard that."

My fingers laced with hers, kissing the back of her hand,  "I don't want to be fighting anymore. I miss you."

"Me neither. I guess I was just hurt that you didn't want to come with me."

I turned so I was facing her, hands holding both of hers. I wanted her to see how serious I was, to remove any doubt about me wanting to be with her. After closing the distance, I couldn't imagine ever going back to that long term. I needed her to understand that. 

"Emily, I'm still coming with you. Not coming with you has never been a thought let alone an option. I just need a month or two to finish this project. It's not ideal, I know that, but this project will get me to the point in my career that I've been working toward for years. It'll mean less hours, more autonomy over what I do."

"Maybe didn't want to come was the wrong way to say that. I was worried that you would change your mind and decide you didn't want to move. Or what if the project runs longer or something happens."

"Hey, listen to me. You are my future Em, there is nothing that would make me not want to move with you. If I stay, even if the project runs longer, I will be coming to you in 2 months at the absolute most."

"If that happens you won't get your promotion."

"I'll figure it out if that happens. There will be other options if it comes to it. Look, if you really don't want me to stay, say the word and I'll move when you do. Our relationship is more important than a job."

Emily squeezed my hands, shaking her head quickly, "No, this is a huge opportunity for you. I'm not going to take that away from you because I got scared. Besides, you're moving because of me, it wouldn't be fair. Get that promotion then come home to me. I know it was a bit of an overreaction, we've done long distance before, it's just been a while and that fear creeped in. I love you Y/n/n."

"I love you. I will always come home to you, you are my home Em. Now that we've sorted that, kiss me because I miss that."

Emily cupped the back of my neck, lips connecting with mine in a rough, passionate kiss. Things got heated quickly so I pulled away as we were still in public. "I missed you."

"I missed you too. I'm sorry for being so stubborn."

"It's okay, let's not make a habit of it though. Since it's valentines day, can you tell me what my gift is?"

Emily chuckled, pecking my lips quickly, "Nope. You can be patient one more day."

"Fine. Can we get ice cream then go home and cuddle now?"

Emily winked, "Just cuddles?"

My fingers ran along her thigh, slipping under her dress, "Maybe spicy cuddles."

---

The next day, Emily and I had spent most of the day in bed sleeping after a long night and cuddling. I had surprised her with breakfast before confusing her by getting back into bed. Normally, I would have to work, but after the last few days, I had decided to take the day off to just spend time with her. About mid afternoon, Emily dragged us out of bed to shower and finally get dressed. I didn't understand her rush to get ready until there was a knock on the door.

"Are we expecting someone?"

Emily smiled excitedly, "That's probably your gift. Go open it."

I slowly opened the door to find a large teddy bear on the other side. I figured it was a delivery person holding it so I awkwardly said hello, waiting for them to move or something. The teddy bear was handed to me, though when I looked up, it ended up on the floor. Standing in front of me, was my bestfriend that I hadn't seen in person for over a year. He had moved out of the country and things were busy so visits were few and far between. I jumped into his arms, holding him tight for who knows how long. We had been friends since birth pretty much, this was the longest we had gone without seeing each other. 

I pulled away, letting him inside before hugging Emily, "You did this?"

Emily smiled, wiping away my tears, "I know you how much you were missing him."

"Thank you Em. I love you so much."

[thenightfolknetwork]

Hello. I'm, um, not entirely sure how to talk about this. I hope it's okay if I misspeak. I'm a human, right, so I think that needs to be clear more than anything, but I've been very involved in the creature community for years now. I live by a great big lake and I always liked to walk down the shore late at night or early in the morning, you know, just to try and get out of my own head, and one night ages ago I accidentally tripped over someone's jacket and twisted my ankle. It was a gorgeous fur jacket, too, not like any kind of fur I'd seen in a jacket before, but just stunningly soft and thick as Hell.

Now, of course I didn't take it, that'd be awful, but also I had just hurt myself in kind of a nasty way and so it wasn't like I had anything else to do but sit by the shore next to the jacket and waited, and yeah, a few hours later one of the lake seals popped its head out of the water, looked at me for a good long while, and then...well, I mean, you know how the rest of the story goes, I'm sure.

Anyway, it's been a few years now and I've become really close to this family. I didn't really know anyone in my town before meeting them and I'm not on speaking terms with my own folks, so in a lot of ways these people have become my family, and it's an honor that they trust me to keep guard of their cloaks and such when they go out. But I've got this problem, right, and it's just...over the years it's felt less and less like I fit in with other humans. All my friends are nightfolk now, my family hates me even more because they're bigots--in this night and age, can you fucking believe it--and it's just like every night I get further and further away from the shore.

I'm just scared because...I don't *want* to stop drifting away. I've had dreams of joining them down there in the lake, practically every night for months on end. I've tried doing research into methods of joining the community but I don't want to become a vampire, I don't fancy any lunar-aligned nonsense, nothing has felt right except selkies, but I can't decide if I'm just self aware enough that I need a push from an outside viewer to try and accept something I already know full well...or if no, actually, that little voice in my stupid head that won't go away that keeps calling me a fraud, an invader, an appropriator--what if the reason it's not going away is because it's right and I really don't belong?

Just...please be honest with me. Am I a complete asshole for spending hours every day trying not to just outright beg my family--sorry, chosen family--to help me sew myself a cloak, or is there something to this?

First of all, reader, please rest assured. As long as you are speaking from a place of kindness and a willingness to learn, you don't need to worry about using all the correct terminology. I always try to listen generously when people come to me in need, and I encourage our followers to do the same.

Unfortunately I can well believe that bigots like your biological relatives still exist. I'm glad you've been able to extract yourself from their hateful society, and have found comfort, support and kinship among the nightfolk.

You say there is a little voice in your head calling you a fraud, casting doubt on the validity of your feelings. As much as you might want to push it away and stop your ears, I want you to listen to that voice, just for a little while. Pay attention to the language it uses and what ideas it seems to have about the world.

And then ask yourself: is this my voice? Does that sound like me? Or does this sound like a last, desperate, wriggling remnant of the people I've worked so hard to distance myself from?

Every one of us is raised with a narrative, a story about the world and our place in it, and how we should treat the people around us. We're told that story by our parents, by our teachers and schoolmates, by television and books and a million other sources. The story is so vast and so all-encompassing, it takes an enormous effort to be able to see any single part of it clearly.

Imagine, then, how hard we have to work to realise some of that story is untrue, or harmful, fed by hatred and fear. To start untangling ourselves from the rotting, strangling roots of the story we've known all our lives, and start planting something new and fresh and honest.

It sounds to me like this little voice is one of those lingering strands of the story you were raised with – one where liminality is nothing to admire or strive for, and where you cannot be trusted to know your own mind, and your own needs. It's time to tell yourself a better story.

You've found people who honour you with their trust and who make you feel supported and loved, as you deserve. You admire them, and want to be like them. None of this sounds “stupid” to me.

This is not a decision to be taken lightly. By all means, take your time, and talk your feelings through with your family. But I think you already know what story you want for yourself, reader – and for what it's worth, I think the world will be better for its telling.

[For more creaturely advice, check out Monstrous Agonies on your podcast platform of choice, or visit monstrousproductions.org for more info]

[midnghtprentiss]

dating emily prentiss - headcons

pairing: ssa emily prentiss x pediatrician!femreader

warnings: fluff content, sugestive smut, cm horrors (children abuse), emily being a softie

no descriptions of hair, skin color, body shape

i'm thinking about making this idea a series. what you guys think?

You meet Emily for the first time because of Hotch. She drove him and Jack to your office in the middle of the night 'cause the poor child had a bad fever. She wasn't expecting to find you. Pink scrub with flowers and bees all over it, white shoes and a funny tiara in your hair. 

"Dr. Y/L/N. This is my coworker Emily, she drove us here." You nod, taking a quick glance at her. 

"Nice to meet you, Emily. Shall we go Jack?" 

That was the first time she was hypnotized by a woman like you. How you treated Hotch and especially Jack. She wouldn't mind spending hours watching you work. 

The second time she saw you was during a case. They were rescuing abused children and the pediatrician the BAU chose was you. Reid, Morgan and Emily stayed at the clinic while you did your best to save those children.

"Excuse me. My team stabilized four of the seven children, they're severely dehydrated and malnourished. With the right work and care everything will be alright." You lead them to the rooms. "If you're going to make them talk, be gentle and calm. No loud voices and movements. Remember, these children just experienced a lifetime trauma. If you need me I'll be in the other room."

"Yes ma'am." Emily answered quickly and received a smirk from Morgan. 

"Ask her out, Prentiss, don't be so shy." 

"That's inappropriate Derek, we are working." 

She asked you out after the case was over. She stopped by at your work to thank you for your help and asked if you wanted to have a coffee next time you're free.

You learned that Emily was addicted to coffee, that she loves fudge brownies and most of her clothes have cat hair. You were so entertained by the way she rambled and how her brown eyes sparkled when she got excited.  She laughed at your 'no sex on the first date' — you failed so bad. When both of you noticed you were breathing heavily in Emily's car. 

"I don't know why that's funny. This rule used to work every time." You gave her a look.

"I'm just too hot for this waiting thing and you weren't even complaining thirty minutes ago!"

The months were passing and you two got very involved. Phone calls when she's away, dinner at her or your place, waking up tangled in the sheets. The schedules work just fine, the cases were longer like your shifts. There wasn't pressure on labeling the relationship that was building, but was serious. This woman had you wrapped around her finger.

Long phone calls or voicemails when she's at her hotel room.

"Hey, I can't even imagine how rough the shift is today. The case is evolving to the right direction, we got different clues today and are close to catching the unsub. I saw a bookstore next to the precinct with the book you told me about, so I bought it to discuss with you on the next date. Reid said the book is fantastic and he told me a lot of curiosities about the author, can't wait to tell you everything. Anyway, call me when you can. I miss you." 

She surprises you with your favorite food when she picks you up at work. You commented that you wanted to eat sushi and the next day she showed up with sushi just for you. Or when you slept at hers she makes your favorite breakfast (with Rossi on the phone just to make sure she's not giving you food poisoning).

Emily is a morning person, you're not. Waking up with this woman looking like a golden retriever, walking around, rambling and trying to make you wake up. 

"You know Ems, if you're doing this to get into my panties you are not getting. Let me sleep." 

"It's a beautiful day, sugar. Let 's go!" She comes closer, stroking your messy hair.

"I hate you so much." You looked at her with the most evil smirk ever. 

When she started to think about the idea of marriage, kids and white picket fence she almost had a stroke. She changed her whole life plan since she met you. The idea of a love that is so light and free wasn't even a real thing in her head. The greatest part of her day was talking to you, thinking of you. You were the reason she was more caucareful at the field, she was being more open about her feelings to her closest friends. 

Girls night!!!!!!! Penelope and you bond right away. She was so excited to see the girl that was making Emily look like a love pudding.

"You are so made for each other, look at that! The way she looks at you!" 

"Penny, calm down!" You drunkenly laugh at her and pass your arm around your girlfriend.

"I think we should get shots for this moment. Y/N help me!" You give Emily a kiss on the cheek and follow Penelope. 

"How do you feel?" J.J asked Emily that answer with the brightest smile.

"I am in love with that woman and it hurts that she has no idea of how much it is." 

"She feels the same way, the lovesick gave. I'm happy you found your half." 

"I bought a ring." Dead silence between them. 

"What? Oh my God!" 

"Keep this down, ok? I'm waiting for the right moment and right now it's not. Hotch went with me and yeah, that's it." 

You slowly moved with Emily and started to have a life together. You share bills, you do chores together, buy things together. Even adopted another cat. Life was amazing, couldn't be better. Until the day she proposed.

[delreyshit]

Dinner

Summary: For months you worked with Ghost, forming a healthy friendship and a connection beyond the… Ethical? Anyway, Ghost feels a need to go for more with you, he wants you, and he plans to win you over, so what better way to start than with a date?

Note: if this gets good results I will think about making a short serie based on this. Also, I was inspired by a tiktok video, so I took the time to write this as best as I could, enjoy :)

I expected anything but this. A couple of days ago, during a mission Lieutenant Ghost, with whom I had a nice friendship, followed by some innocent flirting, came up to me and said:

“I know I'm older than you, for God's sake, I'm 43 and you're barely 27. However, you're very pretty, doll How about we go out together?”

Day and night I held his words in my head, Doll? My legs trembled just remembering his rough voice uttering and referring to me that way. I've been in love with him since the first moment I met him, but I never thought Ghost would yearn for me the way I did.

And there I was, sitting in a refined, yet romantic restaurant, fiddling with the pearls on my bracelet as I watched the burly man I was accompanying tense his arms with his shirt rolled up and his jaw clench as he argued with a waiter.

I swirled the wine glass, amused by the liquid moving in reflections through the glass. I was surprised when in the glass, Ghost's large figure distorted as he sat next to me.

"Excuse me, sweetheart. These idiots… I booked this place days ago and we'll still have to wait a long time for them to take our orders."He sighed. "Don't worry, I'm not hungry. We can wait with these muffins."I smiled falsely as I pointed my hands at the basket on the table.

A deep chuckle peeked out from her thin lips, something very captivating.

"All right, all right. But I owe you a better date, a more… Perfect one."He said, resting his hand on my thigh, snuggling the fabric of my dress.

His very masculine perfume captivated my 5 senses in an impressive way, certainly a scent I wasn't used to, as his suits often hide his whole body, leaving my imagination in charge of what he would look like under his clothes.

"Ghost" "Tell me Simon, please."He interrupted me. "Simon… As much as I would love to spend the whole night with you, I can't get back to my place too late."I mumbled, almost embarrassed. "Oh, no problem, honey, but why should I let you go earlier?"he smiled sweetly. "Tomorrow I have to organize my things and pack them, because I'm moving, closer to work." "Wow, that's interesting."Her hand stroked his chin wisely."Well, if you need help transporting or storing your things, I'm here for you." "Thanks, Simon. I know I can count on you."I replied as I reached out to subtly caress his cheek. To which his body immediately reacted, bristling.

Our order was taken care of and delivered sooner than Simon and I expected. As the delicious plate of spaghetti and meatballs was placed before me, Simon very generously grabbed a cloth napkin and placed it on my legs.

"We don't want your dress to get food on it, do we?"he said with a flirtatious smile.

"Excuse us sir, your plate will take a little longer to arrive, but you won't even notice when it's in front of you."said the waiter, a bit anxious.

"It's okay, I can wait. Just bring me a bottle of wine, please."he replied wearily.

I stroked Simon's forearm as the waiter nodded to his request and vanished among the tables.

"If you like, we can share the food on my plate."I offered. "Don't worry, you eat in peace." "In that case, I'll wait for your food to arrive, I'm not going to eat alone."I answered.

"Oh, not that. Your food will get cold."He said as he settled back in his chair. "I don't care if it gets cold."I said, crossing my arms. "Well, I do, so if you don't eat on your own, I'll make you swallow it all." He looked at me with a mischievous smile.

"Make me."I provoked him with my eyes.

He was quick to grab the services and hurriedly cut up a couple of noodles and meat, leaving them ready to eat on his fork. He exhaled loudly as he grabbed my face with one hand and stroked me from my cheeks to my chin with Desperation? Maybe, yes… I gawk at him, shivering at his caresses and I can't be sure if it's because of the fact of his dominating aura in front of me or because I could see all the expressions his face articulated, he definitely needs to be out in the open and without his mask more often.

A gentle, but quick slap brought me out of my thoughts, taking me by surprise.

"What was that?" "Open your mouth."he ordered me.

I didn't argue with him and instead behaved submissively and let him feed my mouth. My face was overwhelmed with how hot I felt.

"Enjoy…"he whispered in my ear.

He kissed my gristle and then, pulled out a small rose that adorned the vase on the table and placed it between my ear and my hair. I laughed as I tried to chew my food, amused at his somewhat bipolar actions. The move could wait. Without a doubt, tonight would be unforgettable and romantic… And rough.

Extra note: English is not my first language, so I apologize in case there are some mistakes, I try to get better every day. Also if you think I need to work on something, don't doubt to let me know.

[kkukverse]

can we have a drabble or oneshot where the oc says 'i can't pay for anything* this time' or offers to split the budget 50/50 and jungkook literally😒😤😡🤬 gets mad like I'm your man I'm responsible for you etc🤭hehehhe make me a delululu, I don't have work tomorrow♥️😂

I'M SORRY I TOOK TOO LONG TO REPLY! T _ T

anyway, here, enjoy some almost tooth rotting sweet jk. hope you had an amazing rest.

.......

It’s getting colder each day and all you ever wanted now is a hot and spicy soup. You want to sweat after spending a whole day working. Everyone looks gloomy and unmotivated. Perhaps it’s because tomorrow is the weekend. And the weather is not helping at all. 

You're listening to a podcast and it is said that it’s going to snow tonight. It instantly brings a smile to your face. Someone you love adores snow. 

Hours spent at work and your mind is full of that someone that keeps you warm the whole night before. And how he hugs you tightly, very reluctant to let you go to work. He is lucky he gets to work from home today. Knowing that there is someone waiting eagerly for you to come home is lucky too. 

You have about one hour before your office hour ends, and you cannot wait to enjoy the rest of the day outside of this boring chilly concrete. You miss him terribly.

As if being summoned, he called.

“Hello, Jungkook” wincing at your own raspy voice. An effect after  a whole day of not talking to anyone. 

“Ah, my heart. How I miss hearing your beautiful voice.” Jungkook sigh, 

He is always like this, even when your voice is as hoarse as sandpaper, Jungkook still thinks it’s the most beautiful melody he has ever heard, and it always makes you grin like a teenage girl.

“I crave hotpot,” you whine on the phone. Staying true to the teenage girl character. You only act this way for him. Only him. 

“Oh dear, let’s go get some, then. ” Jungkook chuckles. He loves it when you whine to him, requesting something from him, yapping and just being clingy with him. You make him  feel like a real man to you.

“Nevermind,” You suddenly said. You know Jungkook always agrees to your requests. But deep in your heart, you feel selfish. You just wanted to voice your cravings but he is taking it seriously.

“Why?” Now, he puts you on speaker as he shuts down his computer. He is frowning now at your sudden change of mood.

“I just don’t want it. I can cook something later,” you reasoned.

“Baby, we can get it. I’m done with my work. I’m picking you up, and let’s go to our usual hotpot place. Okay?” 

“Jungkook, I can-“

“What is it? What’s on your pretty little head?”

Your fingers are tapping on your desk.

Damn you, Jeon Jungkook. You always know what’s on my mind

“Okay, let’s go for a hotpot.” You agreed. Avoiding him to pry even deeper into your mind. 

“Yeay. That’s my girl, let me treat you,” Jungkook cheers. Your silly man.

“But, I’m paying.” You cut his celebration short.

“No.” he said sternly.

“Yes, Jungkook. I am paying this time.” You want to stand on your decision this time around. If it’s up to him, he is willing to go broke for the whole month just to treat you. 

“Baby, we’re gonna end this conversation and I’m buying you food.” Jungkook’s tone turned flat. It is a sign that he is very adamant on this matter.

“You just spent a lot on the car service, I don’t want to burden you.” You finally blurted out the real reason. 

“That’s it? That’s the reason why you don’t want me to pay?” Jungkook was shocked at first and now he just burst out laughing. “Oh baby, have some faith in me, I still have some money. What do you think I am? Even if my wallet becomes dry, I can eat cucumbers for days. I just can't let my baby’s craving go unsatisfied. My mom's gonna kill me if she finds out. ” Jungkook reassured you.

“Not funny,” you mumble. In truth, you’re about to laugh too, not because of what he said, but because Jungkook always finds a way to make you laugh.

“Plus, it’s not good for the baby if the mommy’s craving is not fulfilled. The baby will be born with drools coming out of their little mouth. Why? Because their father is incompetent. So, my dear, let’s have some hotpot, okay?” He adds. 

Inside the warm hotpot restaurant, your heart and belly are filled to the brim. Jungkook is a champion for spicy food, he keeps on requesting chilli oil as dipping sauce. Your heart flutters every time you look at his reddened cheeks. You just hope the baby comes out as an exact copy of Jeon Jungkook.

[buckgasms]

Kinktober: Beauty and the Beast - part two

I did a thing! It's going to need another part because oh lord this is a complex beast I've created for myself.

Anyway, enjoy and let me know what you think!

The next day Bucky came to find you in one of the many parlours, dusting with some vigour, your eyes puffy but you still looked beautiful.

"Ahem... I uh... Would... Would you come with me?" He seemed unsure but his voice still felt like a command, so you paused your work and followed him.

You walked quietly along the corridor behind him until he came to a stop outside a room you had never been in before.

"Before we go in, I wanted to apologise for what I said yesterday. My behaviour, it was... Beastly. Anyway, I hope this will make up for my behaviour..."

He pushes open the door and you gasp, as an enormous library is revealed to you. It's a little dusty, but you can't help but squeal as you see walls upon walls of books, of every genre you could dream of.

You turned to look at him, a smile spreading wide across your face.

"It's yours, I never get around to reading anyway, I feel you'll make better use of it than me..."

He smiles and you pull him into a hug before you realise what you are doing. You pull away, as you both awkwardly chuckle.

"Anyway, I'll leave you to enjoy..."

He left and you felt a little warmer, releasing the breath you didn't realise you'd been holding.

🥀

As time went on, you spent less time apart. As the house became more liveable, Bucky ventured into more places, just to spend time around you.

He was a prolific writer, and the sound of his scribbling became the soundtrack to your cleaning. Unbeknownst to you, he would steal glances at you as you flitted about the room, occasionally commenting on things out of place, or tutting when you found a stubborn stain. He couldn't take his eyes off of you when your hair fell from your bun and framed your face, the setting sun streaming through the windows, giving you a golden aura.

After dinner, now spent more calmly together, you would take a book from your library and join him in the parlour. He told himself that as the winter months drew in, it made sense to light a fire and share a room together. He told himself that it was normal to feel this way...

You interrupted his thoughts by coming to take a seat curled up next to him, an old book in your hand.

"Bucky look, it's a first edition!"

You forgot yourself a little bit as you squashed up closer to him and handed him the book, his fingers brushing against yours as he turned the pages of the book.

"Um... It's really beautiful isn't it?"

"Hmm yes it is."

But he wasn't looking at the book.

🥀

One night you were drifting off to sleep when you heard a long, loud, scream. You froze in your bed, terrified for a moment, when another followed, strangled and deep.

But you realised, this wasn't a threatening noise, but of fear. Against your better judgement, you moved out of bed, grabbing your robe and dashing down the hallways.

Outside Bucky's room you waited a moment, holding your breath, debating whether to move until another cry came from the other side of the door.

Pushing gently, you called out his name. The light of the moon filled the room, spotlighting the bed, where he lay, tangled up in sheets, sweat covering his brow and chest.

You called his name again, a little louder as you got nearer. He quietened a little but still held fast to sleep. Eventually you perched on the edge of his bed and gently gripped his arm, shaking gently.

"Bucky please wake up? It's me..."

Suddenly he lashed out, yelling as his eyes shot open. You managed to jump away as he adjusted to being awake.

"Who's there? What do you want...!"

"Bucky it's me... It's me. You were having a nightmare..."

His eyes scanned around the room until he saw you, standing nervously at the end of his bed.

"Beauty? I was... Oh... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you..." You could see the pain in his face at the thought of upsetting you, so you stepped bravely back to the bed and settled down near him, your hand dangerously close to his.

"It's ok. I was just worried about you. You sounded in pain..."

He cleared his throat and adjusted his blankets that had gotten very twisted in his panic.

"Just some leftovers from the war" he says, tapping his head with a metal finger. You smile and take his other hand in yours.

"Let me help you..." You stand up and pull the blankets away from him, straightening them and pulling out all the twists. You blushed when you realised he was only wearing underpants in bed, but luckily he didn't spot you in the moonlight.

You draped the sheets over him and watched him settle before he reached out and took your hand.

"Thank you..."

🥀

A new routine settled in for you both. These nightly visits, a few times a week, where you would come to his room, soothe his fears and resettle him before he could go back to sleep.

More and more though, he would share his nightmares, and tell you about the stories of war, that changed him so much.

He spoke of trenches and mud. Friends who were there one day and gone the next. The trauma of losing his arm.

You were devastated when he told you about his return to the village. His neighbours and friends began to ignore him. His scars and arm an unwelcome reminder of the war they all wanted to forget. Or of the families they had lost.

That he could almost bare. But they still wanted him to fund everything. They wanted the Barnes Foundation, now lead by Bucky, to support the town. They just refused to speak to him, to look him in the eye or give him the time of day.

So he started to refuse them. To shut them out and ignore them too. He didn't care if the whole town fell apart, it wasn't his fault, it was theirs.

It was horrible to see his bitterness, when you felt in your heart that Bucky wasn't like that really. He was hurting and in pain. But he was still good at heart, surely.

One night you were talking so late, that you ended up falling asleep in his bed, curled up again beside him.

You opened you eyes to find the sun had risen and you saw him sleeping peacefully next to you. You felt you should leave before he woke, but you watched him for a moment.

He was very handsome, but his face was hidden by a messy, unkempt beard, knotted and tangled. His lips were a deep red, and although he was a natural frowner, there was a slight curve to them when he spoke to you.

His cheeks had very little freckles that you could only see this close. His skin, even under all the messy hair, looked soft and quite.... Kissable.

You decided to get out of bed before you did anything ridiculous. This man was holding you captive essentially... You should not be thinking about kissing him.

🥀

"Bucky... I have an idea...."

You shuffled into his office and he actually gave a full smile when he saw you come in.

"Oh? What's this idea then Beauty?"

You twiddled with your fingers and nibbled on your lips, until he chuckled and stood from his desk and walked over to you, holding your arms and squeezing.

"Tell me..."

You pressed your hands on his chest gently and smiled.

"Well, I was wondering... Maybe you would start feeling a little better if you looked a little more like your old self?"

He cocked a bushy eyebrow, a hint of a smile on his lips.

"Are you saying this isn't a good look for a reclusive man having a nervous breakdown?"

You giggled and pulled at the lapels of his housecoat. "It's perfect for that, but I think maybe you could just try a different look?"

He chuckles and looks at you with a discerning eye. "What would you suggest then Beauty?"

You curled a matted lock around your finger and suggested raised your eyebrows. "I think a nice haircut and a beard trim would be an excellent start."

"You don't have to go mad, just enough to feel a bit more like this guy...."

You tilt your head to a picture of Bucky with his parents, standing proud between them. Hair slicked back and beard short and tidy, dazzling in a suit and bowtie.

"Hmm. Haven't seen that guy for a long time..." He looked a little unsure but you place your hands on his shoulders and squeeze.

"I'd love to meet him one day James..."

🥀

He called for you. Your name echoing through the corridors a little while after dinner. You glided through the halls until you found him standing in the bathroom, a razor on the side and a slightly wild look in his eyes.

"I don't know.... I don't know what, or if I can do this..."

"Oh James... You don't have to...." You said, coming in and standing next to him, watching him in the mirror, talking his arm and wrapping your arms around his.

"No I want to. I should... It's just... A lot..."

"Can I help you? I could do it for you?"

He scoffed a little, "You can shave a beard?" You giggle and poke his ribs, "I have given my father a ton of haircuts and shaves in my time. It'll be easy."

He huffs, leaning against the counter and you a little.

"Ok...but will you stop if it gets too much..."

You lean your head against his shoulder and look at him. "For either of us. Yes, I promise..."

🥀

You send him away and run a bath, nice warm water and whatever nice scents you could find in the bathroom, hoping some bubbles will cover the lower half of him while you work.

Finally you call him back and he comes in sheepishly, and you, with faux confidence, encourage him into the tub, looking away as he clambers in.

Suddenly you wonder if this is absolutely insane, but when you turn around you see him looking vulnerable and uncomfortable and all you want to do is help him.

"Ok just relax and I'll take care of everything alright?"

He settles down a little and you use a jug to rinse his hair. You work slowly but surely, getting rid of all the knots and tangles before you slowly start snipping at the dead locks.

You encourage him to talk, my just little things but you know he's happy if he's talking. Occasionally you add more warm water and bubbles to avoid a chilly man moaning at you.

Finally his hair is cut and his beard is clean, ready for a trim. You move round, sitting on the edge of the tub and pop your finger under his chin, tilting his head towards you.

"You ready?"

He grins and nods, closing his eyes as you start trimming and clipping until his sharp jawline reappears. It doesn't take long before you have revealed a very new looking Bucky.

"There, see what you think..."

He opens his eyes and glances in the mirror which he can see from where he sits in the tub. He blinks a few times, shocked to see himself in a way he hasn't for a good long time.

"Jesus..."

He runs a hand over his face before smoothing his hair back. He glances at you, sitting nervously on the side as you await his judgement.

"I do look like me again... Wow Beauty... I can't believe it..."

You toss the clippers to one side and chuckle as he admires himself in the mirror. "Alright handsome, don't get stuck in there admiring yourself too long ok?"

What you didn't expect was for him to grab you hand and pull you, in an innocent attempt to say thank you. What he didn't expect was for you to fall backwards as his pull was a little harder than he planned.

So you ended up crashing off the side of the bath into the lukewarm water, flat out on top of naked Bucky.

"Oh my god!" You cry out and do your best to get out, but the water and a roaring Bucky doesn't help.

"Beauty I'm sorry..." He pants between laughter as you groan and yelp as you struggle, until he decides the only way to calm you down is to do what he was hoping to do anyway.

He grips your face gently and pulls you towards him, pressing a kiss to your lips. You stop moving and gasp, gripping the edge of the bath as you stare at him.

"Oh..."

He smiles. And you smile.

And you lean in and kiss him again.

[faust-the-enjoyer]

@gluttonybiscuits  asked: Please omg I am STARVING for more dbf!Keegan and I wish I could feed myself but I'm sjfbehfhdhd y'know? 💀💀 Anyway I have the idea of dbf!Keegan with an afab!reader where Keegan didn't know our dad has a kid cuz he wants to keep his work and personal life separate. So Keegan meets reader as an adult. And I like to think when he first sees them, he's like "double smash" but his brain and dick are fighting with each other cuz that's his best friend's kid 😩🖤

Double Smash

Tags: afab!reader, fem!reader, reader is 21+, age gap, guilt, allusions to male masturbation.

Warnings: MDNI.

A/n:....I'm SO SORRY this took like 2 or 3 months.....I was really busy because of school and i wanted to write this but didn't wanna half-ass it😭 but also tumbler made an update where I can't edit saved asks😀 pls to the original asker know that you can request a part 2 to this if you want bc I didn't know how to end it!

- divider by (benkeibear)!

It was just another day on base for the two, he'd always grab some coffee for himself and for your dad when he went into his office, always chatting with him. They've grown to have a close companionship from working together and protecting each other over the years. Your father would always reveal things about himself and only himself, never talking about his family when he's working. Keegan would be the same, always quiet and secretive.

It was during a holiday that you father asked him to come over so he could show him some of his vinyl record collection and have dinner with the family. He was welcomed through the door by your father as you just came down the steps of the stairs. "This is my best buddy, Keegan." your father introduces him to you proudly with a carefree smile, he turns to him, "Keegan, this is my daughter.". his eyes linger on your face as he extends his hand to you to shake it, "Pleasure meeting you.", and as you introduce yourself and shake his hand, you smile as you can't help but notice his pretty blue eyes trail down to your lips.

After a bit of chatting with the two in the living room and hearing your father's endless stories about the two's missions, you get up. "I'll go get dinner ready.", your father excuses himself as he gets off of the couch as well, "I'm going to the bathroom, Keegan, would you mind helping her set the table?", and he didn't even wait for answer, he just left for the bathroom. Keegan lets out a breath as he gets up from the couch, following you to the kitchen.

As he helps you with dinner and the table, he puts dishes in their distinguished spots on the table while looking at you. "You know I...never heard your dad talk about you..." he says calmly, his eyes slowly going over your facial features, he really hopes he didn't understand what he said in a different way. "He doesn't like talking about me when it comes to work, you know, for my safety and what not." He looks away while setting the utensils and cutlery down, "Yeah, I get it.", he looks over at you as you pull a dish out from the oven, his eyes trailing from your gloved hands, to your back, to your hips, to your backside. He could feel his stomach twist and turn whenever he heard your voice, and he couldn't help but let his eyes linger on your body.

He spent the night eating dinner with you two and afterwards your father showed him that vinyl record collection he's been itching to talk about and show off. Your father had kept bringing him back into the house over and over again, to watch the soccer game, to have a drink, to have dinner, to watch a movie, and your father always encouraged you to join, which you gladly agreed to, much to Keegan's delight, prompting you to spend more time with him, and after the holiday was over, they had to go back to base. A new issue arose in Keegan's life; you. As the days went on after not seeing you for a while he couldn't stop thinking about you, the way he'd respond slower when people talked to him on base, and the number of condoms that were thrown in his trash can were all evident of your effect on him, but there was one issue: your father. What would he say to Keegan, his comrade and his best friend of years if he knew he wanted to get with his daughter? What would he do to him? Would he just throw all of those years and memories in the trash? Would he direct his anger at you instead? He didn't know, he couldn't calculate all of the reactions your father might have if he found it, and it made him feel like he was at his wits' end whenever he sat down with him, it made him feel guilty and disgusting.

[mirai-e-jump]

ViVi Magazine, February 2024 Issue Murakami Erica x Hirakawa Yuzuki Interviews (translation below)

Publication: December 22, 2023

Erica and Yuzuyan's rambling talk

The close combination of Hirakawa-chan, known as Yuzuyan, and Erica appear for the first time in ViVi. During this photoshoot, we could feel the close friendship between them, as they giggled and talked the whole time. We asked alot about these two, who are a hot topic right now.

-Our youth is now! Anyway…I'm so glad we met~!-

"What do you call each other?"

Erica: Everyone calls her Yuzuyan.

Yuzuki: I've never had a nickname before, but I got one for the first time on set (laughs). I call her Marie.

Erica: I think everyone at ViVi was surprised to call me by that name. Actually, my real middle name is Marie, and everyone on set of the show calls me Marie. I'm so happy about my secret name~

"What is it like on set?"

Yuzuki: We chat alot while waiting to film. There's the 6 of us filming together, and when we've all gathered, it's like break time at school (laughs). It's so loud and noisy!

Erica: Someone will get into things, someone else will join in and do something stupid, and so on and so forth (laughs). Every day is jam packed with inside jokes. It's silly, but the 6 of us spending time together is so much fun~.

Yuzuki: We've been filming together almost every day for 10 months, so our friendship levels are amazing. From the very beginning, when we first started filming, we were all in perfect sync and got along well. But, when the cameras start rolling, everyone gets serious. It's amazing how everyone's faces change so quickly!

"What kind of personalities do you two have?"

Yuzuki: Marie is, in a single word, a bomb (laughs). Marie's explosive power when she's tired is insane (laughs). She'll suddenly explode and become cheerful. And, we all get caught up in it and get excited too (laughs).

Erica: We spend so much time on the set, that if we don't talk, I get sleepy, so I feel at ease exploding because everyone will pick up the pieces (laughs).

Yuzuki: She does things that go way beyond what you'd expect, so I never get tired of watching her. I'm like, "Even though you're so cute, why would you do something like this?" She's constantly one upping how interesting she can be (laughs). I can't tell if she's trying to be funny or if it's all natural.

Erica: Thanks for letting me do it, and for being on the receiving end (laughs). Yuzuyan is everyone's "straight man" older sister, but she can also be everyone's little sister.

Yuzuki: I'm often described as being a 5th grade boy~. We're the "mess around" combo.

"What does your existence mean to each other?"

Erica: After becoming an adult, I never thought I'd meet someone who I could mess around with so much, even more so through work!

Yuzuki: I'm so glad that someone like her exists, where we can joke around and laugh like this as friends 💜.

"What were your first impressions and current impressions?"

Yuzuki: I knew of Marie's modeling from reading ViVi, and I thought she was just so~ cute and looked like a doll. But, the more I learned about her, the more I thought she was like a bomb (laughs).

Erica: My first impression of Yuzuyan was that she was a very refreshing person. But in reality, she talks alot and is hyperactive (laughs). She notices things that other people don't see and takes the initiative to follow up, and is very considerate. From the very beginning, I felt like she was a dependable older sister. She's also good at remembering directions (laughs).

"How was today's shoot? How do you like Erica as a ViVi model?"

Yuzuki: When I look through ViVi, Marie is so cool…..she doesn't always look like this! It makes me want to get involved (laughs). She wears cool clothes and her expressions are amazing! It's so cool!!

Erica: This was the first time for the two of us to do a photoshoot together for a fashion magazine. I was happy to be able to work as a model like I usually do. We were able to shoot as our usual natural selves, which was alot of fun and very fresh. I thought it would be so much fun to shoot with someone who understands me.

Yuzuki: For today's shoot, she led me around alot, and I was impressed by the fact that she was such a great ViVi model!

"Do you see any similarities between yourself and the role you play in Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger?"

Erica: I think we share the same caring nature. However, I myself am not strong willed, so I admire her for that.

Yuzuki: I think we're similar in that we have humanity. We're both basically no nonsense, and we have our "on and off" switch. However, while my role is to be immovable, I'm actually extremely hyperactive, which is the complete opposite.

[yoyokslut]

Better man. (Sequel of you're losing me)

Pedri x reader.

Word count: 3444 words.

a/n: I know this took forever but I didn't have the inspiration to write it but one night I was listening to better man and everything clicked. Hope you like it :)

12 am and you were still awake... Again, this was the third night in a row. Since what happened at Pedri's was haunting you and replaying in your head over and over again you couldn't fall asleep. It's been 3 months since then and forgetting about it wasn't as easy as you thought.

You couldn't fool yourself, you missed him more than you'd like to admit. You missed going on late night drives around the city, movie nights, making dinner together, laughing about how bad his jokes were and him teasing you because either way they made you laugh, just feeling him being part of your life... Part of you.

Sometimes, in the middle of the night

I can feel you again

He's been texting and calling you but you knew the moment you accept a call or text you'd fall for him like the very first time and you knew you couldn't let that happen, it wasn't fair for you so ignoring him was the best option for now.

Lately you've been going to one of you favourite cafe every afternoon where across of it was a small park with beautiful flowers and near there a beautiful lake, the cafe was a comfort place because there were stunning sunsets and it was always nice to see the kids playing around the park and people having fun in the lake.

So today you decided to buy a coffee and go sit on the dock with your headphones on.

It passed a couple of minutes before you felt someone touching your shoulder, so you took off your headphones, turned around and saw him.

Your body tensed right away it's been long since you saw him.

"Hi," he said a little bit nervous.

"Hi,"

"I've been trying to call you and text you but you weren't picking up,"

"We don't have nothing to talk about anyway," you said trying to walk away from him.

"Please don't go," he grabbed your arm gently "I'm tired of missing you, please let me come back to you, I miss you with my life, preciosa,"

Preciosa there he was again trying to be sweet and calling you nicknames that he knew they made things to you, thinking that was enough and you hate how you and your body reacted to them.

But I just miss you

And I just wish you were a better man

"Oh so you think I wasn't tired every time you pushed me away and made me a second option or sometimes not even an option?" you stared at him frowning "You thought I was very joyful just waiting for you all the time just for you not even notice my presence? You should be the last one to say you are 'tired', Pedri,"

And I gave to you my best

And we both know you can't say that

He swallowed thick, he knew you were right and you deserved so much better than how he treated you.

"I am so sorry, I know I was a jerk and you deserve somebody so much better than me but I can't live without you, I can't sleep if you're not with me, you are my little ray of sunshine in my life, but please give me one more chance, I'd do anything for you, anything you asked me I'll do it, I promise,"

"We both know you're not good at making promises, Pedri, don't promise something we know you can't keep,"

We might still be in love

If you were a better man

"So please stop breaking my heart and stop following me," you said starting to walk.

"I didn't follow you," you looked at him like saying how did you find me then? "Kinda," he blushed.

"I went to every place we used to go when we were together and spend all day there in each of them hoping I'd find you," he looked away from you and your gaze soften at his confession.

This was the sweetest thing anyone has ever made for you.

You sighed for what you were about to tell him and about how vulnerable you were gonna be for him.

"I-i miss you and I still l-love you," you looked at his eyes.

"But I'm scared, what of it doesn't work out? What if we don't work out? I don't want us to get hurt again, I wouldn't be able to take it," a small tear escaped through your cheek.

"I'll do my best every day to remind you how important you are for me, and cherish you for every day I didn't back then. I'm sorry it took me this way to realize how valuable you are, I'll work in myself so I can be the man you deserve and so I can be worthy of you," he said grabbing your face and stroking your cheeks.

"And if you need more time to think about giving us another chance, I'll wait as long as you need,"

"I'm gonna need it," you said.

"My time is all yours,"

Surprise? I guess 🤭

@ironmaiden1313 @http-isabela @gulphulp @sandiaaaaaaa7 @iloveenglishmen

[duchessonfire]

Heyyyy Duchess! 🥰 Omg, I literally cannot with how much I’m obsessed with every single Cegan fic you’ve ever written. It’s like, no matter what AU they’re in, they always find each other and fall in love (in that slightly twisted, totally them way). And honestly? We’re all here for the toxic-but-make-it-hot vibes, lol. 😂

Anyway, no pressure or anything, but I gotta ask... Is Savior!Carl making a comeback soon? 👀 Like, for real, I’ve spent way too much time imagining what could possibly happen next. After that whole condom-gate mess (iconic, btw), our ship hit that sweet spot we were all dying for: Negan lowkey obsessed with controlling Carl and making him his everything, while Carl just wants to feel needed, owned, and finally free from all that fear of being discarded. Ugh, chef’s kiss. 👌✨

But like... That balance is hanging on by a thread, and even though I remember you saying in the comments that things would stabilize by the end of Part 3, my brain is straight-up incapable of imagining how they’d get there without your genius storytelling. I desperately need your words to make it all click. 🙏

That said, if you’re cooking up something new or just need more time to vibe and create, no worries at all—I’ll wait as long as it takes. You’re amazing, Duchess, and your writing has honestly made my life so much brighter. Love ya!! 💕 Keep being the literal queen of Cegan fic. 😘

Hiiiii!

Omg thank you so much for your sweet message, you're too kind 😭❤️

I can't even begin to tell you how much space Cegan takes up in my head, it's actually ridiculous. I spend what feels like every minute of every day *obsessed* with them. A lot of it, let's be honest, has to do with how smoking hot Jeffrey Dean Morgan is, but also I'm still riding the high of the few interactions Carl and Negan had in the series. (If I think too much about the fact we could have had so much more, I'll start throwing up ☠️). They are just THE PERFECT toxic but sweet relationship.

Thank you so much for telling me your thoughts on the Savior!AU, it really means a lot to me ❤️🥺 I will get back into it soon, but it's going to take a while because I want to do a full re-read of it starting with Part 1 + re-watch TWD from the line-up episode all the way to S8 before I start writing again. That way I can really immerse myself back into this universe and into Bad Wolf Negan (which is my affectionate title for Negan before the cell). I've spent the past 3 or 4 months working on my Dead City fic where Negan was very kind and soft and a gentleman so I need a good refresher on how dark and awful Negan can be before I get back into the Savior!AU 😅

First, though, I'm going to post the first chapter of a new fic I have been planning for *a while*, because the Cegan Bingo event ends on December 4th (the day before my birthday 🥰) and I just need to post one more square to hit a bingo!! I'm VERY excited about this new fic. It's going to be super long (as usual...), and it will be set in the real world, no zombie apocalypse. It's also going to be FILTHY 🔥🔥🔥🌶️🌶️🌶️ Like, literally the dirtiest, kinkiest fic I've ever written in my life, and I'm super excited for that. I'll do my very best to post the first chapter within the next two weeks so I can make it before the end of the bingo. 🤞

Thank you again for your sweet message and I hope you'll like all the Cegan that's coming 🤗❤️🥰💐✨