#anyway at first I was like “oh god oh fuck im going to be cancelled”

[ratislatis]

Hello :) do you take requests? Would you be willing to draw-

Teen-High-Binder Transmasc Normal?

here he is!! rooming with his sworn enemy!! waking up at noon every day!! eating ramen every night!! what a life!!

(btw everybody feel free to send me requests! with artfight on the brink I may get a bit slow, but I'd love any ideas you throw at me!)

timelapse under the cut <3

[nicegaai]

im attempting my fic reread today. im announcing this bc i will be liveblogging to keep my morale up, NOT THAT anyone cares but i personally need this, like ill only commit to do the thing if theres an imaginary audience holding me accountable. & i like to have fun :3

anyway. captains log, its a beautiful sunny july weekend. i just finished my morning coffee, and, i am dreading this so much. i dont like rereading my own writing but i shall get over it. ok here we go.

Þetta Reddast vagueblogged directors commentary edition

Ch 1:

*opens fic and starts convulsing immediately* god i wish i smoked weed rn. i cannot chill out ever for the life of me

My Mission For Today Is: to remember what plot threads I’ve left hanging so I can resolve this story properly. And also try n remember where the flow is going. I have the end plotted out, I just am a little lost … it’s been a while :-(

------------

Abrupt beginning!!!! I’m not mad because I have . I HAD. Almost no writing experience when I started this. it isn’t ideal but I refuse to be one of those fanfic writers that starts rewriting early chapters without finishing the last ones. Ive never seen one of those types actually finish a longfic. …I’d already rather yap than actually read LMAO AHH

Oh this is worse than I remember. thats cool that s great ok alright *coughs up blood*

"20 somethings" WOW I really did not know where I was going with this when I started huh

LKJSDLKSJDLGKGDJSLDGJK ??? Who authorized this. Who let me cook. What the hell

I could write this better now. I could edit this into something beautiful. <- devil on my shoulder

FORGOT I WAS MAKING RICE BRB

"generously offered nothing to the exchange." wait STOPPPP. I’m so funny

GRAMMAR ERROR DETECTED why is there two periods. I’ll be coming back to fix that …………………. :-(((

Fuck. This is a lot. Marge Simpson Hiding Her Face dot Png

Oh this is stupid this is gayyy this is fukcinnn . Who fucking did t his. What was wrong with me,. This is so good actually. what was i ONNNN. 

Im gonna throw up and I don’t know if thats like/. A complimentary thing or if im just cringing that hard . Im feeling emotions. I love my OTPs..OT3~5? I love them so so much

Ok as much as im like “eww bad writing” this is .. dare I say, rly good in places. Not to suck my own dick but maybe all hope isnt lost and imposter syndrome is an illusion

Grammar mistake #2. Goddddddd. they should ban me from the archive for this

EMILLLLL EMIL EMIL EMIL HIIIIII BABYYYY EMILLL I LOVE UUUU AWWHUUGHH everyone clap for my bewoved baby bruvver right FUCKING now

Urghhh gritting my teeth… Im fully expecting the flow of events to start not making any gd sense. There’s no way this came together the way I hoped in my head and .... For real I was never able to read this all the way thru. this is my first time, lol. and it was all disjointed on the authorial end to say the least. Im scared T-T

Jlxjvklsdkjfsjlkdkjlsjklkljzsdkjlgaskljdgjklasljkgdljkasljkdgjklasjlkdgljkaskljdgjakl?????????? 

Im not liking the ratio of dialogue to whatever the other stuff is. scene-setting I guess. prose maybe. i could have dragged this out way longer... By which I mean made it a more satisfying read. But WHATEVER !!!! 

TIMO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TIMOOOOOOOOOO NUMERO UNOOOO DO MUNDOOOOOO I really need to utilize him more. As soon as I finish this fic I need to write a Timo POV spinoff where he gets cancelled on furry twitter for proshipping in real life

Hmmmm chapter ending didn’t hit as hard in practice as it did in drafts. Oh well. God damn that was a lot to happen in one chapter LMAOO???

OH SHIT MY RICE IS STILL COOKING —— 

[danvillecheese]

why do u think act ur age is fucked

[cracks knuckles] alright. essay time. you asked for it.

I’ve done a similar response to this before here and mentioned something else about it here but I’ll go over it again since those posts are both from a while ago. also bear in mind I haven’t seen aya recently bc I don’t like it. okay let’s get into it

[also im gonna preface this saying maybe i sound very pessimistic but im ranting and its just gonna sound like im complaining because i am. i mean no real malice by the way. im simply a person with a blog.]

first off. they don’t use the show don’t tell as well as they could. in the what might have been montage, sure, they showed potential scenarios and how phineas felt (very briefly) when isa stopped visiting his backyard but it just feels so rushed. I get that they only had like 11 minutes to show it but idk there has to be another way to write it. or just not have it at all idk its just from a writing point of view the whole episode feels rushed and out of place from everything else continuity-wise. why not use little easter eggs planted in the show beforehand? operation crumbcake? pharmacists? meapless in seattle? god theres so many episodes with evidence that phineas liked her back even if he didnt know. just. continuity!!!!

second. why did their friends not try something sooner. it’s not like they didn’t know. like phineas seems to be okay with saying “i wish! i am so in the friend zone there” in front of his friends (that quote alone makes me lose my shit but that’s a whole other point) so clearly they knew about phineas. and isabella also wasn’t quiet about it (source: pnf s1-4). they had like four years of high school to do something and they planned it the day isa left for college? nah its just the least realistic thing ever for me. also them being 18 is like yeah okay maybe the slow burn was worth it and theyre way more grown up (i love a good slowburn) but ohhhhhh my god SURELY their friends were getting sick of them dancing around each other. just me?

third. and I’m sorry to ash simpson but oh my god I hate the character designs like They Would Not Fucking Look Like That. it almost feels like it completely disregards their arcs during the original summer. like yeah child chub disappears over ur teen years but sometimes it stays a little longer! make phineas less twiggy!! make isa look more like her mother! (am i about to redesign them again? whoops)

four. and i know this is no fault of dan and swampy but the show was about to end anyways and yet the entire friend group was paired off into hetero ships?? get fucking real. none of those kids are straight. realistically, i know it was a different time and gay marriage wasnt even legal in the us yet so it wasnt all that common to have queer romance on screen let alone on disney channel but like i said, the show was about to end. what were the disney channel execs gonna do? cancel it? lmao

five. "I am so in the friend zone there." "we are guys. we do not talk about our feelings." WHAT!!! i cant believe this shit is real. these lines of dialogue are canon. what the hell. what kind of message does that even send to younger, impressionable viewers? if ur a 10 year old boy watching that (ok fine maybe that isnt gonna stick with you forever but listen) and you go 'oh its okay to just bottle everything up and not tell my friends about my feelings about anything ever' that is insane! thats not how things should go!! like i get the whole "im so in the friend zone" and yes, this also has to do with the era but like if they wanted to be a more progressive cartoon that kids look up to and enjoy maybe they just. shouldn't have put that whole conversation in.

i barely have any problems with the b plot. in fact id watch the episode just for the kazoo solo. because that plot lines up with the continuity. i can totally see heinz having bowling night with perry and carl and monogram every week! i can totally see perry and monogram retired! and carl running owca and getting payed for it! that all checks out! that one makes sense and works with the canon! if they got that plot so right how did they get the a plot so wrong?

i can answer this question: fanservice. its an awful word, i know. act your age is a fanservicey episode which is why i think it crashed and burned. mml season 2 is rooted in the same issue: doof is very present and takes away from the original plot of the show. like, the one he wasnt even in until the last episode of s1. slightly getting off topic but it is the crux of the issue. fanservice doesnt make for good storytelling. even if it brings in the big bucks. at its core, telling the story the way it should be told is the best one. even if it pisses people off. a good portion of the viewers will still appreciate whatever ending the creators come up with. and no, im not saying phinbella shouldn't have become canon, in fact i really like the ship and all their dynamics, i just think they went about it the wrong way.

as someone who's written and published fic about them getting together in different universes (granted, they were from when i was younger so its mildly terrible. take them with a grain of salt) there are a lot of other ways to tell that story canonically. honestly, i think the best way of doing it was to keep it ambiguous. dont tell that story. let the viewers pick their own ending for phineas and isabella. maybe they dont get together after all. who knows!

thanks for the ask! hope you had fun getting lectured <3

[iinryer]

I wanna get into boxing so baaad I need to get back to my jock roots too lol any tips??

CHOMPING AT THE BIT EVERYONE SHOULD TRY BOXING ITS MY FAVORITE THING IN THE WORLDDDD

oh my god ok. my starter tip is to find a gym! it may seem super intimidating, but there are beginners gyms and no-contact gyms that aren’t really for sparring or training as much as they are for learning and general cardio workouts!! those are a GREAT place to start to get familiar with it.

im not sure where you’re located, but i recommend TITLE boxing gyms! theyre a chain and sooooo so beginner friendly, scheduled time slots (which helps for people like me who need external structure) that can be added and cancelled via their app, they’re no-contact (it’s all heavy bag and equipment work, not sparring), and when I started going they did first session free and they let you borrow gloves! the only thing i had to buy were hand wraps which was like $10. they had me arrive a little early and showed me the gym, introduced me to the trainer for that night, showed me how to wrap my hands, and walked me through all six strikes! i joke that the sessions are like boxing jazzercise 😂 it’s music and a bunch of people at heavy bags with a trainer on mic calling combos! they also format the workouts like boxing rounds too which is fun

it’s been a couple of years so I don’t do group guided workouts anymore, but it was SUCH a great way to get started. now I train with friends or just book an open gym slot so i can heavy bag on my own or use the other equipment etc.

if you’re not vibing with the concept of hard mode joining an actual training and sparring gym right off the jump, i highly recommend finding a TITLE-esque gym in your area! they will get you set up with literally everything you need to do it for the first time, and then from there you can kind of tailor what you want it to be! i have tons of hand wraps and two pairs of gloves now, i even have proper boxing shoes and i train on occasion—but mostly I just do solo workouts when i get the chance! you might be into immediately pursuing a sparring track and get geared the fuck up, or maybe you’ll just always borrow gloves from a led-cardio gym, ymmv! but imo it’s a really really great way to just get your foot in the door and figure out what you like!

anyways. i love boxing. everybody should try boxing

[weebsinstash]

Im so pissed they leaked half of season two and I got so many spoilers I wanna cry 😭😭😭😭

God don't even get me fucking started because i got spoiled within the last day and im so mad. A friend of mine was telling me to stay off Twitter because the leaks were everywhere and I wound up getting spoiled on fucking YouTube community posts, some jackass posting two massive spoilers without doing the whole

spoilers!

.

.

Thing first, so I literally just glanced at a comment for 2 seconds and got spoiled on, I don't even wanna clarify because I don't want to spoil it for anyone else, but like, it was two things that this person just listed and didn't go into huge detail on, and it's... not what I was expecting? Definitely changes the dynamic between uh two very specific people, and the other spoilers I saw about, a twist, I was kind of expecting anyways and I am interested to see what they do with and tbh I have some drafts where Reader was in a relationship with [REDACTED] and then said person comes back with a vengeance and finds out Reader has cuddled up with the Morningstars and he's pissed

What gets me is I think I heard through the grapevine that Vivzie said they had to scrap entire episodes or things that were leaked so it's like... is the show going to be changed now? Is it ruined? Will it take longer to come out now? I blame social media but now I'm sad. People work so hard to make art and shows for adults by adults and it gets ruined by people wanting clout over providing "insider information". It's already so hard to get certain shows even picked up and then you have things like "oh yeah this show was massively popular but it got canceled and removed from the streaming service anyways to make room for season 12 of Hot Fucking Garbage"

I can't believe we went from "here's cute Halloween merch of people in costumes like Vox and Lucifer wearing animal onesies and Alastor dressed as a reindeer" to "hey you know these characters who are absolutely great with each other? It's all a fucking LIE"

[nijisanji-brain-rot-fics]

rating the fanbases in nijisanji en that im in 🤠🤘

also im not hating on yall im just talking about…… some colorful things about the fan communities im in

aight for one, kyomies. = FUCKING -18/10

im scared of like some of yall. like ongod 😭 either chill or so fucking down bad WW like oh god i watched the confessions stream YOU GUYS. ARE SCARY. PLEASE. I CANT TELL YOU HOW MANY TIMES MY JAW DROPPED WATCHING THAT STREAM. also we needa stop bullying kyo for being the shortest male in nijisanji en lmao hes coping already 💀AHEM… TO ANY OF YALL WHO GENUINELY LIKE ASTERS FEET CAM STREAM… DNI (jkjk but like keep a respectable distance from me pls 🧍✋ yall scare me enough)

kindreds!! = 5/10

yall horny as fuck. all i gotta say. we all know the gwak gwak incident, lets leave it pls. also yall are nice, everyone in chat is pretty nice, yk you get a parasocial chatter every once and a while but oh well wwww 💀💀 ehmmm theyre like the first niji en fanbase ive been in, i have a friend irl whos a kindred, theyre nice yk did not prepare me for the shitshow the online kindreds are

villions = 8/10

i know, we are all probably down bad for ber whenever he speaks korean, BUT CAN YOU BLAME US?? i wanna bet ver is half of his fanbases’ reason to learn korean (can vouch because i started to relearn kr bc of him 😭👌) ALSO HES SUCH A CINNAMON ROLL I JUST WANNA SQUISH HIM!! villions in general, yall r nice, like all i gotta say LOL

sicklings = 4/10

basically kindreds but like twice as horny and mentally ill 💀like goddamn yall listen to his yandere asmrs and go ‘he can fix me’?? is that like a thing in this fanbase? 😭 how mentally ill yall had to be to fall for a therapist [bullying myself rn] like holy shit also that one overlay incident 🫣 lets not talk about it but like anyways yall are ok, its a debatable topic also just wanted to say hex looks like the type of person to have a rice purity score of 53 idk

FaMillie = 10/10

OK SO IM BIASED BC IM ALSO A FILIPINO AND YK SWAGPINOS UNITE BUT YOU GUYS ARE FUNNY I CANT LIE, YOU HAVE GENUINELY MADE ME CACKLE SOMETIMES especially the hugot lines stream, my mom fucking got mad at me for laughing so much some of yall are unhinged like stop bullying millie LOL ik its for shits and giggles but damn, yall are being mean sometimes 😭

Quilldren = 6/10

personally, i havent been in the fanbase too much but most of you guys are chill so neutral score. havent seen too much stir from ike's fans so thats nice, good to know theres one fan base that isnt overtly chaotic [from what ive seen 👀]

scythekicks = 8/10

girl is this fanbase dead or am i just not active on twitter? probably the latter LMAO but like i barely see any doppio fans in the wild like where are yall come out come out you may be outta scythe but you aint outta my mind WWWW we all love doppio in the scythekick household, that man gets so entertained so easily

uhhhh shit ok pls dont cancel me WWWWW IM NOT TRYING TO BE RUDE I PROMISE THIS IS ALL FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES im in these fan bases too IM BASICALLY FUCKING MYSELF OVER

also posts are gonna be slow as fuuuck cuz schools starting and yknow we gotta COME IN DO YOU READ ME?-

im just kidding guys dont hate me for this WWW its for giggles so dont take it to heart

i think i did this wrong in so many ways but oh well LMAOO

[hella1975]

realised i havent complained about my job in a while despite working a shit ton lately including holidays (10 hours xmas eve + 7 hours boxing day + 10 hours new year's eve 🤡) so here's some quickfire BOLLOCKS ive had to deal with:

the kp (19F) and supervisor (33F) almost got in a punch up LMAO

my manager decided to have a complete breakdown on nye and took it out on literally everyone. like he overbooked past our capacity and instead of being normal and just cancelling some people even if it meant losing money this man instead started pulling tables out of his arse and creating new seating areas (anyone who's worked in hopitality knows you Cant Just Do That least of all DURING the busiest night of the year). naturally we had a shit ton of customers complaing about being too squidged together and who got to deal with it? THE FLOOR STAFF i hate everything

same manager same night kept snapping at all of us im still furious about this okay basically i was working a 10 hour shift and at 6pm there's a shift change, so we all tend to move sections and when you've been working the same (shit) section for 6 hours this is a GODSEND. so i got moved from my least favourite section to my favourite section and there's always a bit of a scramble around the shift change bc we're all picking up where someone else left off so it's where MOST of the mistakes happen. this happens daily to every single waitress no matter how experienced. and do you know what i had the nerve to do? i forgot to give this one couple their menus. literally they had not sat for even 5 minutes and were waiting on drinks anyway and my manager STORMS over like 'why havent window 1 got menus' and i immediately was on it like 'oh shit sorry ive just taken their drinks order ill bring them now'. this utter CUNT walked off bc he cant handle actual confronation and the next thing i know one of the supervisors comes over like 'we need you running food so me and you are gonna swap'. and im here like 'okay. weird. i hate running food so this is less than ideal but i cant argue'. i find out from the other supervisor (bc waitresses are GOSSIPS i was always going to find out) that my manager apparently swanned down to them like '[redacted] cant handle her section i need one of you to take over she's in another world' HELLO???????? count ur fucking days

did u know the holiday period actually makes customers ruder. did u know that. did u know the season of joy and giving ends the moment u step into a pub. because i know that now

there should be a law that ur not allowed to flirt with someone who's working. like maybe an exception if they start it first and you just reciprocate but aside that if they're on the clock in a job where customer service demands they be nice to you then DONT FUCKING FLIRT WITH THEM my god i could kill you. one man literally tried to set me up with his son when i was trying to just take a drinks order and that was one of the TAME examples

the bar staff kept clocking off before me and purposely sitting on tables closest to my screen to drink just so they could brag. psychological warfare im telling you

[rillils]

RILLLSSSSSSS OH MY GOD IM GOING FUCKING INSANE 😭 THIS IS GONNA BE LONG OH MY GOD 😭😭

OK SO MY SCHOOL HAS THESE FIELD TRIPS EVERY YEAR AND GOT CANCELED BC OF COVID (this is our first time back face to face, so weve had online classese for almost 3 years now) AND THEY STILL HAVENT BROUGHT IT BACK

SO HIM BEING PART OF THE STUDENT COUNCIL AND ALL, I ASKED HIM TO ASK THE PRINCIPAL IF THEY COULD BRING BACK FIELD TRIPS AND WERE STILL WAITING FOR THEIR REPLY AND OH MY GOD

FOR THE PAST 4 HOURS WE HAVE BEEN FANTASIZING ABT GOING ON AN AMUSEMENT PARK DATE

and rillssssss 😭😭😭

im gonna go insane oh my god 💞💞💞💞

SO HERES HOW WE THOUGHT ITLL GO:

-we meet at school bc thats where all the busses are to go to the amusement park (keep in mind that we dont even know if this idea will get accepted) and this time there wont be any supervisors with us just teachers (bc yay im a highschool student now 😗) anyways

-and wed sit at the back of the bus (each class has their own bus, so hed ask if he could stay at my bus instead, if they dont allow it then wed both go to the bus for the people who are late)

-wed watch movies and share earphones and id lean my head on his shoulder and hed cover me with his jacket (HE SAID THAT ID GET TO KEEP IT OH MY GOD 🥹🥹🥹) if i get cold because i said that ill wear a dress that looked similar but way shorter than the one i was wearing in that picture i sent him (when he called me an angel when i was wearing a wedding gown i wore for my aunt's wedding)

-wed hold hands the whole time and id pull him around to go ride all the rides (nobody knows abt us dating just that one friend, we dont care who'll see anymore, nows are only chance to go on an amusement park date, well if it gets accepted that is)

-and hed hug me from the back (weve never hugged yet nor have we held hands) while we wait in line for the ride

-HE SAID HED GIVE ME PRINCESS TREATMENT RILLSSSSS

LIKE FULL ON PRINCESS TREATMENT, THIS WAS WHAT HE SAID TO ME EXACTLY THIS AND RILLSSSSSSS YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I LOVE PRINCESS TREATMENT OH MY GOD 💞💞💞💞

-he said hed follow me around everywhere

-he said hed tie my shoes if my shoelaces got untied

-he said hed carry my bag while he waits for me outside the bathroom

-and he said and insisted that he wants to pay for everything (except the ticket since the school would be paying for that) because he wanted to give me the full on princes treatment and im fucking melting rilllsssssss 😭😭😭😭😭

-and he has a polaroid camera and he said hes getting a lot of films for it and were gonna take two pictures each so we each have a piece

AND GUES WHAT HE FUCKING SAID RILLS

GUES WHAT HE SAID

HE SAID THAT HE LOVES ME AND OH MY GODDDDDDD 😭😭😭

HE SAID THAT IM PERFECT, THAT I MADE HIS WHOLE LIFE BETTER, THAT HES SO LUCKY TO HAVE ME, THAT HES OBSSESED WITH ME, THAT IM A VERY SPECIAL PERSON IN HIS LIFE, THAT IM BEAUTIFUL, THAT HE WANTS TO MARRY ME, HE SAID THAT HE COULDNT EVEN COMPREHEND WHATS HES FEELING RN AND RILLLLSSSSSS IM GONNA MELT 😭😭😭

ACTUALLY NO, I ALREADY DID 😭

rilllsssssss i love him oh my godddddddddd 😭😭😭💞💞💞

he just said that he wants to treat me like a fucking queen oh my godddd what do i doooooooo 😭😭😭

OMG ANGDKABFKGKFNSKHFK 💕💖💕💖💕💖💕💖💕💖💕💖💕💖 Holy shit bby!!!!! All right, so first things first, I really do hope with all my heart that you guys get to have a field trip again soon, even with all the necessary measures for your safety and health 💕💕💕🙏🙏💛💛💛 Second, OMG 😍😍😍 The date you lovebirds planned sounds absolutely perfect, and Lover Boy really really sounds like the sweetest boyfriend out there, it's all so so romantic 💕💕💕 Damn right he wants to treat you like a princess, you deserve nothing less than that 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 But wait wait wait, he actually said The Words????? HE DID???!!!!!! HONEYYYYYYYYY OMG THAT MUST HAVE FELT AMAZING, I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOUUUUUUUU!!!!!! 😍😍😍😍💕💕💕💕💕 HE LOVES YOU AND YOU LOVE HIM AND IT'S ALL SO PRECIOUS I'M GONNA FLY TO MARS AND BACK OUT OF SHEER HAPPINESS ALONE 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕 It really sounds like you're living your own personal fairytale and I absolutely freaking LOVE this for you 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 Ahhhhhh I'm sending you all the hugs in the world!!!!!!!!

[maythray]

[MASSIVE spoilers for talking abt tpot 3 current voting results under the cut]

i am. so so so so happy i actually thought about who i voted for this episode. normally what ill do is ill go with my gut response or first character i decide on needs votes for that episode while the screen is still up. this. probably sounds stupid but i do it cause otherwise i fall into a cycle of back and forth that drives me insane.

ANYWAYS. i didnt do that this time. cause we have the 2 team voting.

i dont really. personally care for anyone on team S, other than like cloudy (o7) bottle and winner. but i also felt like they all were popular enough to not worry about (i was wrong on cloudys behalf but. what. EVER. its FINE im totally. not upset.)

ANYWAYS so the teameights. there was no way you were getting a vote outta me for that team that wasnt for gaty or saw. i also thought "hey, saw had cute moments this episode, gaty didnt really. and also saw is already pretty popular as a character" and went for gaty instead.

and good god im happy i did. cause she is pretty low down on the votes at the time of me checking. and that was. so worrying for me. cause i would actually be massively upset if she got out so much earlier and before saw :(

im not really worried for her now. as it stands the bottom half of the votes look like this now (i normally dont look at these but i got spoiled by accident so whatever)

oh my god nevermind point cancelled fuck my whole life. gaty in the 8s bottom two oh fuck my whole life it used to be her having a 2 person buffer. I NEED TO STOP WORRYING itll be fine itll be fine IM STILL GLAD I VOTED FOR GATY IM NOT WORRIED ABOUT SAW ITS FINE ITLL BE FINE!!!!

[nardonotes]

26 oct '24

4:30am

lads.... (≖_≖ ) ok first of all,, there's going to be two posts with the 26th because im basically writing about the 25th rn but it's 4:30am so it's the 26th ANYWAYS-

so i woke up late asl,, there wasn't a specific time to go in my work experience anyways, and the last time i went it was like 12pm,, so ?? they teased me for it a little bit but like y'all are not paying me AT ALL also im going fucking warehouse work when i should be sitting upstairs with the graphic designers and watching them work so i get an insight of what this career path looks like for me in the future. ⁽⁽(੭ꐦ •̀Д•́ )੭*⁾⁾ so like.... i will SHOW UP WHENEVER I WANT TO FUCKING SHOW UP. and im not filling that fucking 60hrs omfg,,,, literally just gna lie to their asses because i did so much work today with no break. literally free fucking labour. but god bless i dont have to think about it for another week. ( ≧ᗜ≦)

when i got home, i literally knocked tf out. like i was soooo exhausted. wait i just lied- before i knocked out, i ate CRAB !!! (one of my favourite food, i love seafood a lot) and went to the repair store with my sister to help her get her laptop fixed. (¬⤙¬ ) OH! and i also got my film i developed. im kind of done with getting them printed in though,, i think i'll just take digitals from now on, and if i want certain film printed, ill either do it myself or pay less than like a tenner for a few.

so where was i- THEN I KNOCKED OUT!!!! i slept at 6pm and woke up at like 11pm? i felt so good after though,, i ate, cleaned my room, washed my sheets, CHANGED MY SHEETS EEEEEEKK!!!!!!!1 i love love love new sheets :33 now im writing this. im kind of hungry though... im so glad i don't have to do shit tomorrow. i'm going to watch IVE stuff because it's been so long since i have and i need my coping mechanism to cope my mechanism. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

hmm,,,, what else. oh right the girl; HOUUUGGHHH...,.,..,..,.,,,......,. like/... this minor (which is not so minor bc we're grown enough to communicate) issue just turned me off so bad like... she's not very good at communicating. and the more i think about it, it's like,, she didn't even apologise for cancelling.. so like u clearly dgaf. so... (¬_¬") idgaf anymore./ i kinda lost interest after this,, if she wants to raincheck properly with me, she can put in the effort bc i can't be assed.. i already expressed that i was lookin forward to it- and that i'd like to know when she's free, and if her roommate doesn't fuck up her plans again (which i also think is just an excuse. ahem.) it's fine tho really,, i watched wony vids last night and was like wow... i don't need nobody but her ( ´ཀ` ) like wow... shit got me droolin ( ´ཀ` ) ( ´ཀ` ) ( ´ཀ` )//..

LOL. anyways. im excited to just rest and recharge this week. i'm going to try and not make so much plans with anyone either because.. i need this time alone xD....

ok goodnight/morning. im going to find something to eat, and then watch some stupid youtube shit!! eeek!!!!! so excited!!!!!!! <3 never kill yourself. <33

song of the day: Mercury by Ravyn Lenae °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

[baekhvuns]

IM BACKKKKKK

Bestie, ateez ain't making it easy for me to live especially seonghwa. 😮‍💨 BCZ THOSE LONG HAIR AND THOSE POOL PICTURES AGHHHHHHHH GOD! Anyways, about my life 😃, so, i am taking like a drop year...i obviously had to as you know my whole situation BUT I'll be doing some certificate courses and you know learning something skill based while i...do a job, yes you heard tht right😞 I GOTTA MAKE SOME MONEYYY and honestly I've cancelled out going abroad for a few years at least, I'll solely would be focusing on living here and...yeah. I'm not completely giving up, but, focusing on some other things. Mhm. The only prblm is tht my mum thinks I'm, wasting a year and considering how much of an overthinker she is, she's worrying about what others would say and Quite honestly I don't give a shit...the universe wanted me to do this...like this is my life and it's going on how it was planned so I don't see why I should be bothered by a few relatives 🙄

And other than that I HV BEEN OBSESSED WITH CHALEYA 😭 like I sing tht song every 3 seconds fr i can't. And I've been getting obsessed with oneus, their new single baila conmigo 😮‍💨 oh my lord. Another controversial thing...i didn't like jungkook's new single 3D ..... like...what was even the point?? Bro- and i hv no idea who jack Harlow is..I've seen people obsessing over him BUT THT RAP 😭 NAUR THT DIDN'T DO IT FOR ME. and honestly, it's so weird how jungkook's basically singing abt doing the deed every damn time, like ok boi I get it, and I liked seven obviously BUT I HOPE HIS ALBUM DOESN'T HV EVERY SONG IN IT LIKE THIS!

Ok what're your opinions about this whole lisa situation tho? Her performance at tht one r-rated dance thingy? Honestly, ok hear me out, idfc what lisa or Jennie anyone does in general, it was her choice she did it...and people keep hating on her bcz tht what people do...what I want to say, is what if it was a bg member...like what if it was jk or taehyung doing something like this? I bet all these girls would go crazy and be obsessed over it or something like, "omg they're breaking the kpop standard" i genuinely despise this double standard thing.

Ok rmr i told you my cousin was getting married HER WEDDING IS SET IN JANUARY 😭 AND I'M THINKING ABT MY DRESSES AND ALL. And I've been a little crazy abt traditional and ethnic clothes rlly, like yesterday me and my mum were acting like besties on a girl's night fr, we took out so many clothes and tried em in, she made me wear a saree 😭 AND IT LOOKED SO GOOD LOKE SAREE TRULY GIVES AN ELEGANT AND RICH LOOK, i felt like those 1920s rich mistresses. I mostly wear Western clothing, like only ever rarely, you'll find me wearing a suit or something similar but as I'm growing up my feminine energy keeps on blossoming so i def wanna wear a suit.

Can you imagine it will be my first ever suit...my younger cousins hv worn those things so many times and I'm making my new one, progress ig.

But yeah and no my mackenyu obsession is not dying down 😃. OH ALSO ITS HOODIE SEASON FINALLY THE ONLY THING I LOKE ABT WINTERS! And forget about the present seonghwa...THE BABY SEONGHWA 😭😭 HES SO CUTE LOOL AT THOSE CHEEKS I WANNA NOM NOM 😭

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CwWTt1dgpk0/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

SOMEONE SAID IT WORKS BCZ HES 11 YRS OLDER THN ME?!?! GURL 11 YRS 😭😭?!?! HOW OLD R U???

HELLLOOO!!

the long hair and the pools pics omg no bc those has me screaming at night hfkwjdlw

oooo like a gap year??? but on certificates omg ok what certificates r u doing 👁👁 marketing, sales certifications r >>> I GET IT 😭😭 need to make money in this economy can’t even breathe without having to pay

omg not the what will others say, the brown parents and the “log kya kahenge” will NEVER leave their minds god damnit,,, tell ur mom gap years r a good decision 😭😭😭 !!!!! travel, live a little and idk start a small business or a job! no ur right, if it turned out this way it means it’s meant to be done this way <3 FUCK YOUR RELATIVES RESPECTFULLY i can’t believe it’s still the same mindset in every brown parent’s mind 😭😭

STOPPPP I HWVE BEEN TOO I WAS JUST HUMMING TO IT AND DOING THE DANCE STEP (have not watched jawan yet!) SUCH A CATCHY SONG???? SRK DOING IT AGAIN,,, omg oneus ive not heard abt them in a WHILE

ooooo ive only heard the part that replays on ig = the chorus so in that sense i grew to like it ive been doing the dance to it that “u know how i like it girrrrlll” part kdvwmcjclikc I DIDNT LISTEN TO JACKS PWRT IM AFRAID ITLL RUIN IT FOR ME FBWKDJKW LMFAOOOO honestly i don’t mind,, i do hope his album has lil different genres, pop, dance, r&b, reggaeton etc excited for it actually!!

hmm so i get the whole “ur a kpop idol pls maintain a image” but honestly it’s not that bad??? it’s a creative choice and it’s a form of dance that’s on the more provocative side?? but u know what i do dislike, those toilets they have in the men’s washroom at crazy house that are a WOMENS MOUTH STRUCTURE. if it’s seen as an empowering thing, i completely disagree with it

but again, idk the issue but i also get why knetizens r talking abt it bc asia is quite conservative to these things so they find it weird and all and prefer to keep it under wraps UNLIKE THEIR MEN THAT GO SEE IT SO FJWKDJKW ur right,, if any other man did it (they literally do it w the stage outfits some of them wear) they’d get 100k likes and praises but when it’s blackpink and blackpink esp it’s suddenly a big controversy

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA STOP THIS IS SO EXCITING I LOVE TALKING ABT TRADITIONALS FJWKDJKWHSKS stop the 10/10 mom daughter bonding moment omg i do this w my mom like thrice a week and get to wear her wedding clothes and jewelry!! STOP NOT HER BRINGING THE SAREES OUT AAAAAAAAAAAAA A 90’S MISTRESS??? 😩 UR MAKEUP BETTER BE THE UNAPPROACHABLE ONE W THOSE JHUMKASS STOP IT

omg ur turning into a women, i used to be like that too (partially bc we never have events for me to wear them at) but it’s so comforting and feminine-y to pick out fabrics and jewelries and matching outfits for weddings 😭😭😭 ur turning into a women omg <33333 but omf lmk i will rec u stores to buy clothes from and ur gonna gate keep them 🔫

STOP THOSE CHEEKS STOP IT IM GONNA BITE

link no.

11 YEARS?? ELEVEN YEARS???? WHAT THE FUCK????? ANON UR A CHILD WHY R U HERE …. he’s 4 years older than me 😭😭

[aesthetic-lillie]

a long ramble so skip if ud like

anyways was on twitter and i saw a post abt transitioning before 18 and how lucky it is to be able to do that and like. yeah. honestly im surprised i even got T a few months after turning 18 bc it feels like a stroke of luck

my first endo? asked my mom if "there were any signs as a child" thank god my sister was there cause my mom claimed "no there wasnt" like girl. u had to bribe me into wearing a dress or skirt. i started covering up my chest in middle school and wearing baggy shirts/sweaters bc i hated my chest. i used to hide my hair in a hat bc i thought it was so "interesting" that ppl would mistake me as a guy like??? the closet was made of GLASS. anyways that endo went on to recommend puberty blockers still,,,, when i was 16 and already went thru puberty,,,,, anyways! forever a bit peeved abt that certain endo bc she didnt give the proper info for getting T also i remember like. reaching out to planned parenthood and another place and they just. either straight up did not give me an appointment or they cancelled on me with no heads up abt it (i sobbed abt that cause. what the FUCK)

anyways. it was lucky that my next (and current) endo was like "u got a support group or net? u got diagnosed? cool get a blood lab done and see me in a month." she was so real for that.

but yeah ill admit im privileged to have a parent willing to like. help me get therapy despite the stigma in our culture. but yeah my heart goes out for everyone who cant start hrt due to any reason

honestly the only thing im kind of nervous abt is encountering my father cause like,,, why is that homewrecker trying to start contact with me D: ,,,,, sir,,, go back to being a deadbeat u were more fun that way

LMFAO SORRY but like???? i thought he was gonna piss off after i graduated cause like. u literally said "oh ok i dont have to pay child support anymore" and then only offered,,,, $100 for college,,,, for a pencil or notebook,,, erm,,,, anyways hes kind of funny in a pathetic way cause??? why wld i want to fly to another country with u??? absolute clown behavior

[pegasusknightsonly]

now that im at endgame i want to quickly run through my team and what i learned about awakening luna playing it again after seven or so years

what i learned:

i used WAY too many units. nice as it was to have a full second gen trip the late game it was not really feasible without a lot of grinding

its generally better to play aggressive than defensive on maps, even if it means you're not using pair up so you have better action economy. chapter 4 and chapter 9 were really tough until i went all out with the aggression.

myrmidon might actually be good in Luna bc avo+10 becomes really really good when it's cancelling out a whole bunch of hit+10s. this does not fix lon'qu's bulk issues.

map skirmishes blocking useful shops are the fucking devil and not something you can do anything about other than wait until you hit endgame. really annoying feature

DLC doesn't scale to game difficulty!! that's fun

weapon forging is my new best friend

van/ven is still ABSOLUTELY broken and Owain hard carried my team through several maps

and my thoughts on my team!!

Robin - i actually think i fucked up by second sealing at twenty instead of promoting? armsthrift is nice and i wanted it for Morgan's inheritance but robin fell off really really hard by the midgame and i never got him back so it would have been nice to have rally spectrum available when that happened. ultimately that was ok for me bc unlike the luna guides will tell you i was not solely relying on robin for the front lines but oof he fell off harder than Fred

Chrom - Chrom is Chrom. not much to say there. he didn't get to see a lot of combat early which kind of worked out in my favour bc it meant he was still in lord in chapter 12 and gave Sumia some HUGE effective dual strikes with his rapier. it might actually be worth delaying his first class change to get that?? as usual i went archer -> bow knight and he was great in both. rally skill is actually really good to have on a non-combat unit in later maps where everything has so much speed and avo, it definitely made the difference for Nah a couple of times

Sumia - MVP. oh my god she was so good. i had to grind Olivia anyway so i ran her through great knight and although i don't want her to see any enemy phase combat at this point it has been really helpful to have her fly in, kill something annoying with a luna proc and fly out again to physic or rescue. rally speed has been really helpful as well! i had to do a little hand holding with her in chapter two but early investment pays off so well and i can't think of another unit who can transition from frontliner to support as well as she can. love her.

Fred - when people say awakening luna is unplayable without using Fred are they like. are they just bad at the game? don't get me wrong he was fine but imo the Fred carry/Robin carry meta really only is true until chapter 3 which is... not long, and definitely not long enough for Fred to have the kind of reverence he has in Luna meta. idk. he was fine! i had to finagle a bit to get him and Olivia married which was a pain but then it was nice being able to give Olivia extra move via pairup in the late game.

Olivia - i normally bench her after getting the kids when i play hard bc galeforce is just better than dancing and she becomes a liability with the ambush reinforcements so it was kind of novel to still be deploying her in the valm arc, even though that was mostly just to dance Sumia so i had two actions worth of healing. i had to do a LOT of grinding with DLC to get her galeforce for inheritance which was pretty painful and her stats were never that good. dance utility for my healer has been pretty nice!

Sully - i probably shouldn't have used her and shouldn't have given her the resources that normally go to wyvern Panne but i LIKE her and she did really really well in chapter 12 after she promoted and got lance access back. Gaius s support is solid but those first few levels before reclassing were really difficult because her bases are just so low. if awakening luna slightly bumped up everyone's bases it would be a joy to play.

Panne - it says a lot about how good wyvern Panne is that i brought her back in to the team way too late and she not only kept up but then outperformed Sully who'd had so much more investment. brokenly good unit and by the time i got Yarne she had late game worthy stats. the lack of galeforce kind of hurts as does her weapon ranks - she was stuck using bronze axes for so, so long - but yeah. good unit. believe the hype.

Nowi - i have really mixed feelings about Nowi's performance because it was just. so painful. her bases do not get bumped enough and at the start everything was doubling her and her awful 18HP. speed issues continued for a long long time but she eventually kind of pulled it together. a bit. not sure I'll do this again

Vaike and Lon'qu - mostly they were used to produce Nah and Yarne respectively but they were ok!! really solid backpacks. Vaike's stats were toilet tier for a long long time but he got there eventually. lon'qu loved dual striking for panne so much it got her in trouble a couple of times. it's good that they can support each other as well!

Gregor and Miriel - i put so much into Miriel lmao i love her. woteva. she was fine, bulk and survivability issues but that's pretty standard for Miriel. i also had trouble with her critting things i did not want critted. Gregor got so little investment i actually felt kind of bad for him. i promoted him after like... one or two levels worth of dual striking experience but i probably should've done it sooner

Lissa and Libra - early promotion to get Lissa tomefaire (mostly from rescue staff abuse) was worth it! really solid performance from both of them and Lissa had decent offenses on her galeforce grind. i wish I'd used Libra as a frontliner more but ultimately Lissa needed more exp than him and that's how it worked out, but it felt like a missed opportunity bc Libra in luna is really, really good.

Sumia!Lucina - i was worried about her stats on recruitment but she's been really really good and had some fantastic survivability thanks to her aether procs. great unit, does everything she needs to. i ran her through great lord for rfk + rapier access and that worked pretty well! her final class was between bow knight and paladin but surprisingly paladin has better overall stats and she didn't desperately want anything from bow knight. i don't think i would want to do anything dramatically different with her

Chrom!Cynthia - BEAST. BEAST. BEAST. ALL OVER THE SHOP

Libra!Owain - my only van/ven build and boy did he do good work with it. kind of ruined a couple of maps when the computer abandoned all reason and prioritised attacking him bc he was a staff unit which was a pain but ultimately pretty recoverable. van/ven is good! van/ven owain is good!!

Gaius!Kjelle - sadly she became mostly just a pair up bot for Owain. i never quite got her offences up to scratch to get her galeforce which was a real shame. Owain appreciated the stats and a partner with flight though

Frederick!Inigo - ugh. my only real disappointment in this run. speed!! speed!!! where is his fucking speed!!!! giving him galeforce was nice and all but he can't use it very well if he can't fucking double!!!! Inigo!!!! what's going on there!!!!!! i think Fred passed down dual guard+ which is fine but ultimately inigo would've been better with either luna (the lack of offensive procs really started to hurt him) or deliverer for extra movement for Cynthia. kind of pain to level and promote. he relied on his s support with Cynthia a LOT.

Vaike!Nah - might have been a little too ambitious to want to run her through merc and hero before bringing her back to manakete but those Vaike offenses ended up really paying off. very very slow to start cooking but so good once she got going. sightly too tanky? enemies tended to avoid her on EP which wasn't helpful. her sol proc rates also need some work but overall a really solid unit and one i might bring back to hard mode or use in luna again.

Lon'qu!Yarne - I'm glad i made the decision to bring Panne back to avoid Lon'qu/Lissa. listen. i have not asked Yarne to do too much but he has done it so well and has probably contributed the most in battles for the least exp. bless him! bless his name!!! i wish Panne gave him a better class set. he could have been everything.... that said, even if my original plan of barbarian -> beserker -> griffon didn't work out due to lack of EXP he still did really well and sat in an unpromoted class until chapter 25 when i took pity on him and went to a DLC map. really solid guy.

Gregor!Laurent - i had such plans for a strong and bulky nostank with armsthrift and then it just... never happened. im sorry Laurent. i don't think i ever gave Gregor enough levels to make that work. he did ok promoting to dark knight instead of sorc to be Morgan's pair up bot but i kind of wish I'd managed to get him going. i have two forged Nosferatu in my convoy that i now can't use. whoops

Lucina! Morgan - less than 25 str or mag as a level 10 dark flier was not it. great crits, great aether procs but what the hell happened to her offensive stats. bizarre. probably not unfixable but she's going to close out the game as a rally spectrum bot. rip

Cynthia got the most MVP awards but Owain was just so, so good and Lucina did everything i needed her to. Sumia!!! she's so good!!!!! anyway i had a lot of fun with this run once i found my feet with it and i... honestly will probably finish it and immediately start another one lmao. it was fun!!!!

[rrxnjun]

stress is deff a bitch but i feel like me and stress are the same now so🤡🤡

it's the 20th of august🤭 nooo that's a bit sad that u couldn't add urs but ur still a king for adding three birthdays in there🫡

WELL I HOPE THAT WONT HAPPEN AGAIN!!🤣 whaaattt that's such a long time oh my but the fact that u still had it is jaw dropping tbh

i don't understand why middle aged women have to be so rude sometimes☹️ wait i completely forgot that accents exist oh my god now thats even worse🥲 YEYY U SHOULD ARANGE ONE IN OCTOBER AS WELL COME TO THE 5SOS SHOW WITH ME/j (i'm heartbroken i have no one to go with so i probably can't attend) (i hope this doesn't break ur heart more cuz i saw ur posts about them sorry if it does☹️☹️hope i didn't cross a line with this joke☹️)

NOT TELLING ANYONE🫢 i look up to u for that cuz i'm still pretty much unable to do i suck💔 SO TRUE THE BEST DESCRIPTION I HEARD OF THEM JUST SOME GUYS!! i was so sad when yedam and mashiho left and i understand the soft spot he is such a lovely guy🥹 being a treasure stan is fun and a heartbreak but glad u admit now that ur a teume 🥲😌 ofc ofc we are sharing😵‍💫 HE IS SUCH A MENACE AND ITS SO FUNNY tbh he was the reason why i came back to tumblr cuz i wanted to see more content and things about him then i ran into the same problem as u that there are not that many writers in the fandom here tbh (or i just can't find them)💔 (sooo if u end up writing something for jihoon i will be waiting🫣)

IT SHOULDNT BREAK UR HEART IM SORRY IT WAS A CRY IN A POSITIVE WAY!!! i think it just means u portray emotions well (?) cuz every time there is a good sad scene in movies or books i just have to fight the tears back even when i was in a good mood before💔 AND THANK U FOR BEING AN AMAZING WRITER AND JUST BEING LOVELY AND READING MY LONG ASS REPLIES LMAO U ARE JUST TOO NICE OF A PERSON💖💕💝 (liebestraum anon💕)

omg 20th august is such a good bday to have im noting it down!!! 😌😌

IT IS the fic was originally supposed to be a part of collab but the writer deactivated and cancelled it but when i asked if i can keep the idea they were ok with it!! so yeah hopefully one day 💓

LOOK lets go to the concert together 😭😭 im like,, half serious and half joking 😭😭😭 i keep telling my mum about it and like the bus tickets to budapest are only 7€ and then i can find a cheap hotel and shit and i have money saved for the tickets 😭😭😭 like. budapest is objectively the closest stop to me ((even tho im still salty there is no vienna then i would go for sure) and i wanted to visit anyway 😌 but my mum doesnt wanna go w me and my dad doesnt either and i have no friends that would wanna go w me either and i am not allowed to go alone so. theres that 😭😭 i dont think ill get to go tbh im still kinda heartbroken but oh well its not the first time :// if i didnt live in such a shitty ass place this would all be easier 😭

girl i think its a miracle tbh but i got the names down. thanking my hyperfixation tendencies 💓💓💓 when i saw it i was so shocked tbh and now i keep getting sad mashidam edits on my tiktok fp and living through the pain LMAO. GIRL my crush on jihoon is getting out of control like genuinely what the fuck is happening to me- WHY IS TEUMEBLR SO DRY THO WHERE ARE THE FICS ??? i found like 3 fics and the rest are like 2 years old headcanon posts its such a struggle 😭😭 do i really have to do everything myself on this site.... (dont feed my delusions but give it a few months and if i dont fall out of them i can see myself creating a seperate treasure blog.....got a jihoon drabble idea the other day but. i will contain myself. so far he's the new main side character of the mark fic im writing 🥴)

awh you are too sweet 😭😭😭😭 thank u so so much !!!! this means the whole world to me 💓 once again was happy to hear from u, hope youre doing well ily xx

[tendomichiko]

Fireflies

-a childe x gn reader fic! ft. zhongli

- angst

- this is my first time writing a fic so pls excuse me if my writing sucks😅

"good morning, childe!" you said with a smile, walking towards the tall man who was now getting ready for an adventure of a day.

"good morning, love." his voice was obviously showing no interest, but you shrugged it off anyway thinking that he was exhausted with all his harbinger work.

"you got any plans today?" you asked, trying to lift up the silent vibe that was surrounding you both.

his eyes suddenly lit up in excitement , "yes i do! me and the traveler are going around liyue today!" he ended with a smile.

ah yes. the traveler. you couldn't help but be jealous of her. the traveler lumine who was always admired by everyone and everywhere she went, lumine was perfect in every way.

your lover always told you about her and his adventures everyday, and you seem to notice that she's a nice person indeed. but of course, you can't seem to brush off the jealousy you always felt when you realized that he spent more time with her than you.

you shaked your head trying to interrupt your inner thoughts , "is there anything wrong?" he asked with a slight hint of worry in his eyes.

"oh no, not at all," you smile weakly in response, handing him the newly sewn jacket that was in your hands.

"thank you, my love. to make it up to you, let's go on a date tomorrow tuesday!" childe exclaimed and was about to wrap his arms around your waist until he realized that you were frozen in place.

"hey, you okay?"

fuck. "it's already monday fuck fuck fuck." the voice inside your head panicked. you may ask, what's wrong with monday? it's all wrong because today, was the day that you were going to die.

yes, die.

monday was the day in where you were going to turn into thousands of little light particles that reminded you so much of fireflies.

as far as you can remember your ancestors were cursed with this uncurable "sickness" due to them not obeying the creator god's rule in the past.

your dad also died from this "sickness" along with his other siblings. they said that only the ones with a kind heart will get to live for 25 years and vanish from this world. which explains why your mother and bothers are rude as hell.

and yes, you didn't tell childe about this. you didn't want him to worry about you. but now you were going to tell him so he can cancel all his plans with the traveler and so you can spend your last day with him.

"here goes nothing i guess." your inner voice spoke.

he raised an eyebrow on you when he saw your eyes painted with tears , readying themselves to fall down your cheek.

"childe, actually today-" you were interrupted by a knock on the door. you saw his eyes lit up from happiness and hurriedly wiped your tears and hugged you tight,

"that must be the traveler! im sorry but, just continue what you want to say later!" he let out a boyish grin, and opened the door to reveal a gorgeous blonde haired girl with a flying talking object beside her.

they all smiled at you informing that they were taking their leave but you couldn't help but break down when they left.

"but what if there's no later...?" you mumbled weakly, while your knees were on your chest.

you knew that he's definitely losing interest in you and is already taking a liking for the traveler and you think that he can't tell you because you know that he's afraid to hurt you.

you wiped your tears and remembered the way childe looked at her, it was the same look he gave you when you were both dating for the first time.

so you decided to follow them secretly and you did. it was very surprising that you didn't get caught in action while spying on them, "a little spying won't hurt right?"

but dear archons, you knew you shouldn't have spyed on them.

because you saw childe and the traveler hugging each other and exchanging kisses, while they were laughing at the floating object that was trying to fish

"this is fun, ajax! we should do this more often!"

ajax...? how can she call childe by his real name but you... can't.

your heart shattered into millions of pieces. you were right. he did love her.

tears started to fall and you couldn't help but sob loudly. but before they could hear you, you ran away as far as possible.

you didn't know where to go anymore, but you suddenly remember one person,

the person who was always there for you, the person who protects you and takes care of you.

zhongli.

you ran and ran to the wangsheng funeral parlor, when you arriver you opened the doors to reveal a zhongli that was peacefully drinking tea.

his eyes averted to the door, but in the second he saw tears running through your face, he immediately ran to you and engulfed you in a warm hug.

"what's wrong, y/n? did someone hurt you?" he worriedly asked, while caressing your hair.

"i- i- t-t-traveler ch-childe..." you couldn't speak properly and your voice was muffled since you were basically buried in his chest.

hours passed and you told zhongli about everything you saw and about your last day, and oh boy he was beyond furious of childe.

the night was coming by as he held your hand, dragging you outside of the funeral parlor.

"i guess you're going to be a customer of mine tomorrow." he chuckled with a hint of sadness, while you laughed and leaned on his shouler while you were both walking to a certain destination with hands intertwined.

"i wonder what childe is doing right now." you mumble, as zhongli stopped his tracks making you stop too, "let's... stop thinking about him, shall we? let's just enjoy our last moments together." he smiled.

it was now very late night and the day was about to end minutes from now. childe was now going in your shared home bidding his goodbyes with the traveler by giving her a short peck followed by a smile.

"y/n! im home!" he exclaimed, but it was oddly silent. he knew that you always waited for him to come home no matter what time it was... but you were just asleep, right? he thought to himself. he then went to your shared room but he was only greeted with a tidy room with no one inside.

he already searched through the whole house and still didn't find any trace of you. his stomach dropped, and his face was starting to sweat with worry, he hurriedly went to the kitchen to find notes since you always left him notes in the kitchen whenever you left by yourself.

"there it is." he smiled with relief while wiping his sweat and picked up the note that was laying on top of the table.

"i love you"

those were the only words in the letter. his eyebrows sticked together trying to understand what it meant. he was terrified but he didn't know why.

childe then flipped the letter to see if there was something left, there really was.

"but you, love her"

his heart dropped, you knew.

he quickly ran outside of the house and went to the place that you always went to.

the ginger was already formulating an apology in his mind while running with such speed.

he found you, hugging another man while fireworks were decorating the night sky.

childe immediately recognized that it was zhongli, but he immediately froze when he saw you crying in the other man's embrace.

he knew it was over for him when you caught a glimpse of him. his whole world stopped when he saw your face, he didn't know what to do what to say.

then the dark haired man saw you and signalled you to take his place.

"zhongli no-" he shushed you.

"he's the one who deserves to spend your last night with, not me." he smiled softly.

your last night...? no way, this can't be real right?

you smile when zhongli kisses your head and let's go of your embrace.

childe immediately hugs you and buries his face on your neck you knew that he was already crying since you felt your neck get wet,

"hey y-y/n, what did he mean by your last night?" his voice was shaky and muffled.

"im dying, childe."

"why didn't you tell me?" his voice was showing a hint of desperation , he needed an answer to why you didn't tell him.

"would you even care if i told you? i was about to tell you earlier but your lovely traveler interrupted and you didn't even make me continue."

"but i said was going to make it up with you tomorrow i-"

"there's no tomorrow childe, no tomorrow for me to be exact."

"plus, i know you two have been dating behind my back..." you weakly smiled and cupped childe's face, giving him the last kiss you can give him.

"i-im sorry y/n, p-pl-please forgive me just don't go please!!" he hugged you tightly.

"take care of her, okay?" you kissed him one last time.

"n-no please you're the only one i love!!"

"it's too late now..." you sobbed in his embrace, "im also sorry for being the worst girlfriend ever!!"

"n-no!!"

you both were now in a sobbing mess as the fireworks were on a beautiful rampage.

"it's time now..." you lifted your head to face your lover.

"thank you zhongli," your faced the tall man who bowed at you and gave him a smile.

"and i love you, ajax."

his eyes widened when he heard you say his real name, and it made him want to make you stay more. but he knew he was too late when he saw your whole body slowly fading away with lights that also reminded him of fireflies.

he hugged you tightly one last time, "i love you too, y/n..."

and you were completely gone in his embrace.

he broke down on his knees and started sobbing uncontrollably while the tall dark haired man smiles, walking away and mumbles to himself,

"see you later, creator."

[monsterenergysimp]

Permanence

corpse husband x fem!reader 

summary: you meet corpse on a stream and you’re surprised when he reaches out to you 

warnings: cursing, mentions of tattooing

word count: 1.9k

notes: This is proof read but could have missed some stuff. This is my first corpse fic and my first time writing fanfic since I posted that super cringey book on wattpad when I was like 12 or something. I’d appreciate feed back so please reach out to me :)

main blog @itsmysleepover

read part 2 here!

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You were cleaning up your station so you can get home and stream. You loved your day job as a tattoo artist but you also really enjoyed streaming. It started as a way to promote yourself as an artist and the shop you worked at but it eventually became a really fun way to destress at the end of the week (or day if you were really itching to stream). “Hey Y/N was that your last client?” your boss, KC, asked as she walked to the front of the shop and put new flash drawings on the walls.

“Yes ma’am!” You said back excitedly. You finished cleaning your station and tossed your black gloves in the trash. “And you can’t trick me into staying and taking walk-ins,” you joked with her. She rolled her eyes and walked back into her office “It was one time,” she said as you slid on your jacket. As you walked out your phone buzzed in your pocket and you checked to see who had texted you. It was a message from Sean asking if you were free to play Among Us with him and some other streamers. You replied that you were on your way home right now and totally down. You were excited to see who was playing this time around since their Among Us streams are super entertaining and have gotten really popular.

On your way back you tweeted and posted to your Instagram story that you’d be streaming soon and set up all your stuff once you made it home. After a few minutes, you had a couple of thousand people watching. You entered the discord chat and Sean spoke up. “Everyone this is Y/N she’s sensitive so be gentle.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you guys and I’m not gentle, I'm ruthless,” You say into your mic and notice the chat calling you a liar. Everyone was in the lobby waiting for the game to start. “You sound way too sweet to be ruthless,” Corpse said. The countdown started and you were imposter with Charlie.

“This should be fun,” you told the stream. Yout tried playing strategically but after such a long shift your brain was mush. You saw Poki in nav and killed her then vented into shields. Not long after the body was reported and you were sure you were going to get voted out or at least sussed.

“Where was the body?” Felix asked. “Nav and I didn’t see anyone near there so whoever is imposter must have vented,” Corpse responded. Felix spoke up again. “I think I saw Y/N walk that way and I haven’t seen her since.”

Shit, shit, shit shit. “I’m in shield right now so-” you said trying to defend yourself but Charlie spoke up. “I was doing tasks with her earlier and I saw her walk into shields so she’s safe but I’m still not sure about Rae.” Everyone discussed a bit more and some people, including Corpse, voted for you but Rae got the majority vote and was ejected. You released your breath and kept playing being extra careful.  

“Okay, guys that was super close. Corpse knows and is out to get me,” you said to the chat. You were eventually voted off but one round later victory was written across your screen with your ghost and Charlie’s avatar. “Good game guys,” Corpse said.

“I told you guys I was ruthless!”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You sat at your station doing nothing because a client had canceled a four-hour session. You were listening to music and sketching some stuff but you were bored out of your mind and you didn’t want to leave in case you got a walk-in. The music got quiet as you received a twitter notification saying someone had messaged you. You reached for your phone and saw you had gotten a dm from Corpse.

C: hey :)

You didn’t know what to respond. You were mostly confused as to why he decided to message you out of the blue. Did he want something? But what would he want?

Y: Hii! This is sudden

C: was i bothering you?

    shit sorry!

Y: Youre fine I wasn’t doing anything rn

C: how has your day been

    i dont usually do stuff like this

Y: Im glad you did im doing better now I was so bored

C: what were you doing that was so terrible

Y: NOTHING! thats the problem :(

C: im sure youll find something to do

You stared at his message. Unsure what to respond.

Y: Im gonna give myself a tattoo

C: what?

    NO!

You tossed the needles you used for your tattoo into the sharps box. “Oh my god you didn’t,” KC said. She noticed the wrap on your calve from the tattoo you just gave yourself out of boredom. “It’s not my fault I didn’t have anything else to do!” You said trying to defend yourself. She sighed and just shook her head. “Just go home business is slow today.” It was raining so the shop probably wasn’t going to get a walk-in anyway and you didn’t have any more clients for the day. It was only 2 pm but you drove home and after making lunch for yourself decided to stream. You weren’t expecting too many people so it was bound to be super chill. Your leg felt sore reminding you of the tattoo. You snapped a quick pic of the fresh jack-o-lantern on the side of your calve and messaged it to Corpse.

Y: [image] it came out nice!

C: thats  super cool actually

    i was concerned why you would just give yourself a tattoo but i found your instagram and       youre super talented

Y: Thank you!

For some reason, it felt strange to just have that be the end of your response.

Y: Im about to start streaming if you wanted to watch

    [link]

C: ill be watching ;)

What’s that supposed to mean?

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You sat in your apartment watching tv, hand lost in a bag of Doritos, and scrolling through twitter. You had stopped paying attention to the anime playing on the screen since you’ve watched it a hundred times and knew you wouldn’t miss anything. It was Saturday and you usually take those days off. Take the time to do chores or meet up with some friends but today you felt like not doing any of those things. As you continue your endless scroll (not helping the twitter addiction you told yourself you’d try to get a handle on) you got a message from Corpse.

C: wanna talk?

You looked down at the message unsure of how to answer. It was a simple yes or no and the obvious answer was yes. You and Corpse had started talking more regularly. You still didn’t have each other’s phone numbers but it was fine. Your conversations weren’t too big-- just you sending him memes, tiktoks, and telling him how much you liked the songs he would drop. Or him complimenting a tattoo you did. Sometimes he’d message you during streams telling you funny stuff his fans would say in the chat and you’d do the same. You learned a bit about each other but nothing too deep or serious. Like how you two lived a few cities away and you both really liked Donnie Darko. When Sean first invited you to that game out of everyone else there you were most excited to meet Corpse. He’s just so sweet and funny. Of course, you’d love to talk to him but you were also itching to talk to him and the last thing you’d ever want to do was make him uncomfortable.

Y: Yeah id love to talk

Here goes nothing.

Y: Wanna facetime or something?

     No pressure or anything it could even be a regular call

     I think facetime is just my default lol

You sent those last two messages quickly after you had sent the first. You wished you could know what he was thinking. It was killing you to think you had turned him off from talking to you completely. You put your phone down on the couch and went to wash your hand of Dorito dust. When you got back from the kitchen you turned off the tv and tossed yourself onto the couch.

Still no message.

Why am I so fucking stupid?  

Just as you were standing up to stretch from sitting on the couch all day your phone buzzed. You reached for it fast and looked to see that it was him. You became super excited still not even knowing what the message said. It could have told you to never talk to him again for all you knew.

C: sure lets facetime

    xxx-xxx-xxxx

You had his phone number. You added him to your small but growing contact list and called. You sat on your couch waiting for a response when he finally picked up the screen was black. It didn’t upset you; you kind of expected it and didn’t care what he had to do to make himself more comfortable during this call.

“Hey,” he said. His voice was raspier than usual.

“Did you just wake up?” You asked and looked at the time. It was about a little past noon and you had only eaten Doritos all day. Shit, you should probably make a decent meal.

“Not that long ago but yeah,” he responded and giggled. That giggle.

“Well, I’ve eaten nothing but Doritos all day while rewatching Ouran High School Host Club, so you’re welcome to join me as I make myself something to eat.”

“Sounds like fun; what are we eating?”

“I don’t know yet,” You said as you stood up and made your way to the kitchen. You opened the pantry and looked. You noticed a can of diced tomatoes and reached for it then checked the expiration date. It was still good. On your counter were some onions and garlic. “How about some tomato soup?”

“Sounds delicious.” you smiled at Corpse and your phone screen not knowing if he was also looking at his screen or not. “You’re really pretty-- you know that?”

“Thanks, but you don’t have to--”

“I’ve already told you what an incredible artist you are so many times I bet you’re tired of hearing it, but you already know what a talented artist you are.”

“That is very kind of you Corpse,” you said to him bashfully as you chopped the onion and opened the can of tomatoes. “But once again you don’t have to reach so far to compliment me.”

“I’m not reaching you are talented and beautiful and--”

“I thought I was pretty.” You could hear him chuckle with a smile on his face. “You’re both,” he said. You could feel your face getting warm from blushing.

“Fuck you you’re making me blush. My face is all hot and stuff.”

He laughed at how flustered you got. “That’s the cutest thing ever.”

You didn’t know how to respond so you just put some olive oil in a pot and tossed in your onions. It became silent but it was a comfortable silence. You turned the stove on and watched the flame for a few seconds. “If it was dark we could pretend we were together and having a bonfire or something,” you said to the phone as you turned the camera to show him the flame (still not 100 percent sure if he was looking at you or not).

“I’ll put it on the list of things to do when you visit me someday.”