#anyway I'm gonna go dig a hole that I can live in now because that's what I deserve for having thoughts. bye.

[running-in-the-dark]

I've got more to say on that post (tw I'm insane I don't know what to tag this as its just. mental illness man idk.)

I'm really, really glad that other people apparently really don't know what it's like to feel like that. like you're not allowed to think certain things or that thinking them makes you bad.

because fuck I wish that was me.

I find it almost impossible to talk about this but I'm trying because I've found it's really the only thing that helps a little bit - and it feels like literal torture, like. I am having to actively fight every instinct in my head to be able to type any of it.

but. just. man I just can't. sometimes I can do it, but sometimes it's like now and I get so panicked about it that all the words just fucking disappear. literally can't talk about it.

okay, I'll try a different way. so. I get extremely obsessed with fictional characters (which you know if you've ever looked at this blog because duh). obviously that means I think about them. a lot. all the time really. and it's. it is really really hard, honestly. just like. imagine having to basically check every. little. thought. to see if there's anything there that could make you a bad person.

again, can't go into any more detail because My Brain (probably should stop saying that, I guess it's like, part of the ocd tendencies I have or whatever) won't fucking let me.

so, I'm trying to work on that, and for some reason I'm doing that by writing it down instead. because then I have like, the option to go back and look at it and be like actually this is probably fine. not horrible, not the worst thing anyone has ever thought, and even if it was - no one but me is ever going to see this, so why should it even matter?

but more than anything it's like. shown me how fucking insane that is. I literally can't even write so much as like. a hug. without feeling like I'm the most disgusting piece of shit ever (lots of complicated reasons but it boils down to basically. well you're thinking about his body. and that his body would feel nice. and that is absolutely not allowed in any way). when I've said that I'm writing some insane shit I don't mean like haha, this is sooo dirty hehe :3 no guys I mean it is literally insane and mostly me literally having to write paragraphs of dialogue in which the character assures me that it's okay and I'm not horrible for thinking that and. like I'm literally writing him as if he's my fucking therapist because that's the only way I can justify it in my own head.

like, I am not exaggerating when I say that I've made myself feel like I'm physically ill from overthinking this so much. I literally felt like I had a fever because I got so extremely stressed out about it. I think that was about like. holding hands or some shit. I'm 32 fucking years old. I'm literally married (won't even get into that but fuck dude just imagine being like this and. yeah).

and the funniest part about all of that is that I feel so unbelievably ashamed about all of it that I don't think I could even mention it to a therapist or whatever. like the thought alone is so absolutely horrifying that it makes me feel like I need to be punished for it. so I just convince myself that well it can't really be OCD anyway because I don't even have compulsions anymore (even though I did, and they affected my life so much for like, 15 years at least), and well even if it could still be that even without the compulsions well it's not that bad really. I mean I don't have the issues that people with actual OCD have, it doesn't really affect me, so what if I can't think about fucking that fictional guy, imagine how much a therapist would laugh at you for thinking you should get help with that, nope your brain is just fundamentally broken (it's always been that way after all, so it can't be something like that, no you're just broken and wrong and that's why all your thoughts are bad, you're just the worst person on Earth).

I can't explain how hard it is to even like. just talk about the most mundane shit. like let's say there's a picture of The Guy and I think he looks good. it's such a struggle to let myself say that. like literally, something as fucking basic as that. literally anything that is an admission of 'hi I've thought about his face and his body and I think they look kind of nice' makes me feel like I should literally die. that's why I've been trying to say that shit as much as I can lately, with the reasoning being well if I just keep doing it and nothing horrible happens it'll get easier right? (nope it doesn't, not really)

and like, there's so much more to it than social media, obviously. like it's probably 99% my upbringing (didn't even fucking realise until very recently that a lot of it is based on religious stuff because I didn't understand that my family was even that religious. yeah I don't get it either. but there's way more than the religion aspect, just pretty much everything about my childhood and my parents and. everything). but it does play a huge part in it for me and. I don't know what to do about that and I'll probably do nothing because doing anything is hard and I'm already completely overwhelmed by everything.

yeah idk all of that came from thinking about that video too much, idk, I'm shutting up now

[lymtw]

Thinking about Toji trying to prevent you from having nightmares, but you're just so sure that a light is enough to keep you from being scared.

"You really gotta stop watching shit like that before bed. It's late," he says, watching your thumb scroll to another eery video.

"It's fine. It's like watching during the day with this lamp over me," you say, shrugging off his warning. Your brows crease slightly, your heart thumping a little faster in your chest at the plain image in front of you that only seemed to distort more as you swiped.

Toji watched your reaction every time you scrolled to another video, digging deeper into this rabbit hole of supernatural, disturbing-looking entities. You looked uncomfortable, but you were on a roll.

"I'm going to bed," he mutters, smoothing down the crease between your brows before getting up. He stops at the beginning of the hallway, peeking at you one more time. "You coming or what?"

"In a minute," you mumble, still deeply invested in what entity your birth month and the other months are given, and the survivability rates.

Toji rolls his eyes, muttering to himself as he makes his way to the bedroom. He knows you're gonna sike yourself out and go to sleep even later because of those stupid videos. But hey, he warned you.

You follow five minutes later. In reality, you only felt comfortable watching those videos because Toji was hovering over your shoulder. When he left, your senses were tricked by everything. The curtain swaying was really the wind blowing through the window. Things that fell off the coffee table weren't balanced to begin with. That wasn't enough to convince you anyway, so you turned off the lamp, and tip-toed away quickly. You turned your head in the direction of any open door, closing it immediately before reaching the bedroom.

Nothing could have prepared you for the scream that formed in your stomach, flowed to your chest, and rolled out your throat. Toji had crouched down on the floor, and camped it out until he saw an inch of your fuzzy pajama pants. He didn't even have to make a sound, the act of him just grabbing your ankles and pulling you down was enough to make your heart explode.

He laughs like the menace he is, hushing you as he wraps his arms around you and sways your trembling form with his. You're breathing so fast, trying to relax even after finding out it's just Toji.

"Should've followed me to bed, hm?" He kisses the back of your head.

"Fuck you, Toji," you squeak out with the remainder of soul you have left in you.

"Told you to stop watching those stupid videos, didn't I?" He can feel your heart thrashing against his palm.

You scramble, trying to escape his arms. "I'm sleeping in the living room," you grumble, gripping the doorknob, ready to slam the door.

"You don't wanna do that, princess," Toji says in the calmest voice, a sly grin on his face. "It's still out there waiting for you."

Your hold loosens on the metal, your foot flat on the ground now.

"Mhm, I think you're better off toughing it out with me."

You give in, and roll into bed. Toji chuckles at how far you are on your side, practically falling off. He joins you on his side, gradually getting closer to your warmth until he's centimeters from spooning you. You huff and put your hand back against his chest when you feel his legs trying to tangle with yours. He pushes it back towards you and wraps around you tightly.

"There's one under the bed, too, and you're way too close to the edge." Toji grins at how quickly you stop trying to squirm out of his hold, stilling completely.

If scaring you is the only way to get you to listen, he'll gladly do it again.

[deadnatura11]

Remembering that post that said Tommy was interested in Eddie first and it got me thinking -

What if Eddie tries talking to Tommy about being attracted to men because a) he's his friend and b) he's someone outside the 118. So it's easier.

However, because he's tiptoeing around the point, Tommy misunderstands his interest in men to he interest in him, specifically.

Instead of telling Eddie he's flattered, he leans forward and catches Eddie off guard with a kiss.

A kiss Eddie immediately breaks because - because that's Buck's boyfriend why would Buck's boyfriend be kissing him.

"It's okay," Tommy says. "We're keeping things casual."

Eddie accepts it but he doesn't believe it. Worse, he feels awful being around Buck, hearing Buck talk about Tommy, knowing that he's been kissed by the other man. So he distances himself from Buck.

And it works. Until Buck corners him.

Buck digs, and he digs, and he digs, until finally he hits jackpot and Eddie admits what happened with all the speed power and intensity of a gushing oil well.

"I don't even know why I was being so weird about it," he says. "You two are seeing each other casually."

"We aren't."

Oof.

Buck leaves to confront Tommy, and Eddie can't help but feel that he ruins every good thing he comes across causing him to wallow and spiral further - compounded by the fact Buck now begins avoiding him!

He is at his lowest.

That's when he comes across Tommy at a bar and Tommy flirts with him again, confessing how he was interested in Eddie until he got the feeling Eddie wasn't interested. He says that they make more sense anyway. Eddie is disgusted. "How can you be talking about Buck so caustically?" "He's a cute kid, a good kisser. But we never seemed to click."

That pisses Eddie off so much that he slips into a tirade about how great Buck is, which leaves Tommy wide eyed, saying, sarcastically, "Sounds like if anyone should be with Buck, it's you."

Which... makes sense. To Eddie. He has an epiphany. All this time spent searching for someone, some woman, to fill the 'hole' in his life, and he already has it. With Buck.

He leaves and drives straight over to Buck's.

Luckily Buck answers the door, grateful to see Eddie, because he wanted to speak with him, too.

Eddie’s grateful - how perfect they both come to this realization, they both understand how important the other is in their lives and never wants to lose it. Like an ending ripped straight from his favorite telenovela.

And Buck starts by saying how stupid it was to be mad at Eddie for something he didn't do, that it was Tommy's fault and he's the one he should be mad at. That Eddie is a great friend and he'd never want to ruin their friendship over something stupid like a guy.

Eddie laughs, a little manically. "There'll be other guys. Better guys. Better than Tommy."

"Maybe," Buck shrugs. "But if there is a person out there for me I... I think I'm gonna have to make them wait."

"What?"

Buck is taking a break from dating to figure out who he is outside of a relationship. Realizes that he jumped into dating Tommy all too quickly after Natalia dumped him, and is going to focus on himself for a while. "We can still hang out though." Buck promises. "And the less dates I'm on means the more time we get to hang out together."

It's hell. It's torture. But it's Buck, so Eddie forces himself to look happy with Buck's decision and support him.

There'll be time, he thinks, hugging Buck. And when Buck is ready, maybe Eddie will feel like the kind of man who deserves a chance of love with Buck (he already is, of course, he just needs to realize it).

[hoonieswhore]

Some hard thoughts for dom hoon sbsjsn bc I can't stop thinking about him now </3

Imagine starting off by sucking him off <//3 he's at the desk doing important stuff or wtv (or even better, he's live ) and you crawl under it and start to suck him off </3 he'd stop talking because he feels your hands undo his pants and wrap around his dick, jerking him off until he's hard. Fbdnsn you know he's gonna punish you after but that's the point of this 🤭 you want to rile him up just so he can fuck you until you're going dumb <3. He ends the live when he feels like he's getting closer to his orgasm, he's had enough with you jsjsjs.

"Care to explain yourself?" He'd probably say smth like that after he ends the live and looks down at you sbjsjs. Anyways ahhh he'd push you onto the bed and he'd fuck you in doggy </3 he'd make you go on all fours and if your top part of your body falls against the mattress he'll only go harder on you dnsjsn (I want him sm I can't omg) he'd continue even after you've came for the 6th time, he wouldn't care if he'd overstimulating himself. He'd have his hands on your waist or hips and his thrusts would be so 🤌 sjsjsj

At the end he'd make you ride him and of course you're body will be too tired to do that so he'll be all cocky and be like "Why can't you ride me baby? Hmm? Have I fucked you too good?" Bdnssn he'd have that stupid smirk 😭😭. He'd make you beg for him to fuck you again </3 ask him nicely and he will bdjsjs. He'll hold your waist (or ass shsh) and lift you up and down on him, he'd be softer with you by now because he knows you're tired <3 he'd love it sm when you fall against his body with your face in his neck sbsjsn. He'd start praising you by now too bnsns "you're doing so well for me angel" nzndnsnsnsn like ????

And then the aftercare 😭😭 (I'm still not over that post I sent you ahh) he'd literally be so soft with you, asking you if you're okay and making sure he didn't go too hard on you :( kissing your lips softly while cupping your cheek <33 once you both are clean you'd fall asleep in his arms, feeling safe and sound <33.

God I want sm 😭 want him to ruin me just to be soft with me after omg </3 also sorry this is long 💀 my imagination rn lasnsnan

Hoon would cough or pretend to zone out every time you deepthroat him, digging his nails into his palms as he tries not to think about how good your mouth feels around him. He'd try his best to keep talking about random stuff without moaning or he might even forget what he's saying but people would think that that's just normal Hoon. He'd hurry up and say goodbye when he feels his orgasm approaching, ready to take his hands to your head and push his cock deeper into your mouth, thrusting in a fast pace until he's cumming and groaning as he says something like "You better swallow all of it, whore." If he sees cum dripping down your chin, he'd smear it all over your face to teach you another lesson. He'd be soooo mad cause sweet boy loves talking to his fans, but he also loves to tame his little slut<3 He'd tell you to explain yourself and then he'd start teasing you for being so needy for him while he takes you to the bedroom, then he'd push you down on the bed as he palms himself. He'd tie your hands as part of the punishment and manhandle you, putting you on all fours before pushing his tip into your hole but he won't fuck you yet, he's gonna make you beg for his cock. He'd tease your hole like that for a few minutes and he'd push his whole length in and out of you from time to time, just to have you crying over his cock. When he finally thinks that you learnt the lesson, he'd start fucking you roughly until you cum all over his dick but he won't stop there cause "Daddy/sir also wants to cum, slut, now shut up and take it." His thrusts would be so hard and he'd slap your ass or thighs if you whine too loud or if you tell him that it's too much, he would mock you like "Oh? Is it too much baby? Then why aren't you using your safe word huh? I know you love it when I use you like my personal cumdump, I know you like this too much, I can feel you clenching around me, dirty whore." He'd make you cum over and over again until he knows you can't and he'll cum as much as he wants. Sunghoon just wants to see you full of his cum and completely dumb. When your legs are shaky from the overstimulation, he'd tell you to get up while he lays down, stroking his cock again as he watches his cum dripping down your hole and thighs, making a mess on the bedsheets. He'd bite his lip and then he'd order you to ride him, if you don't sit on his cock and start fucking yourself on his cock, he'll slap your ass and make fun of you. "I thought you wanted to cum again slut but look at you, can't even ride my cock, it's pathetic. You begged for it and now you don't want it? Come on, slut, if you want to cum again, earn it." If you ride him for a few minutes and pout at him, he'd caress your cheek as he fakes a pout and asks you if you're tired, waiting for you to beg him to fuck you. If you're good and beg him, he'll make you lay down on the bed, pushing your legs against your chest as he starts to thrust in a slow but sensual pace, kissing your tears away and your lips. He'd hit all the right spots as he makes out with you or kisses your neck softly. He'd want to cum with you and he'd moan against your lips as he keeps pounding, riding both of you through your orgasms. When you're finally done, he'd hug you, keeping his cock inside you since he loves cockwarming, as he whispers sweet words in your ear, praising you and calling you his good angel. He might even sing for you and tell you how much he loves you. After getting cleaned, he'd cuddle you in bed and kiss your whole face before you both fall asleep.

[cutekittenlady]

Tumblr Plays Pokemon White 2 - Part 5

I just need one.

Just to steady my nerves.

JUST. ONE.

GLUG

GLUG

GLUG

Ohhhh thats the good stuff.

Okay Polly. You can do this. Just walk out on that soundstage. And, i dunno, act?

Dear lord this is like third grade talen show all over again. Only this time I don't have Hugh to dig the hole.

......

The filming... actually turned out okay? It was pretty standard fare hero schlock but ah well.

And hey, i actually have a fan!

Hmmm this is going straight into my veins.

Dont tell my mom.

Your lucky I've had my lemonade hit today old man.

Welp. Guess I'm a move star now.

hehe.

Oh shoot it's dark. Uhhh is Pop Roxie still running his boat? I did say I was gonna do all the gym matches so I kinda gotta go to Castelia right? Hnngh maybe I'll come back to do more films later?

At least after getting a set of wings or something to get here and back again in a jiffy.

I wind up running to the pier in the rain.

Okay Hugh I'm here, sorry I took so long. See there was this bald guy with a really unfotunate name and-

Whaaaats going on here?

What like.... like the terrorist group? I mean lets not jump the gun here Roxie. I mean just cause theyre dressed kinda funny doesn't mean we can just jump to conclusion. Besides even if they WERE Team Plasma they wouldn't just admit to it. Nobodys that-

... Wow okay so... you guys are like... actually that dumb then?

Look I- No I get you wanna make some big dramatic speech but I- Stop cutting me off you RUDE LITTLE-

Hugh, baby, do NOT cut the Polly off when shes speaking! You know what happened in third grade.

Anyway Hugh goes off on this whole hate filled speech about how much these guys suck. And I expected some kinda edgy response but instead.

Home slice. You were chased... by Lillipup? Dude I hit a Lillipup with a bike when I was, like, five and it was flattened like a pancake. Sure, I got banned from riding for, like, ten years but my point is that anyone who runs from a Lillipup, a Lillipup right?, has no right joining a terrorist organization.

God its the third grade all over again.

Hope you have a shovel Hugh.

Oh sweetie.

We're gonna bury you.

Plasma Grunt sent out a Patrat against Bentley and you can just tell that Bentley has a chip on his shoulder over the Gym battle because hes raring to go. Patrat starts with bide after Bentley wraps him up, after that I had Bentley use growth while Patrat stored energy. Next round Patrat releases the energy and Bentley hit him with vine whip. That combined with wrap gets the little rat int he red. Patrat manages to forestall hi defeat with detect but one return later and its over.

After defeating the Patrat Bentley learns Leaf Tornado.

The Plasma grunt and his buddies have enough sense to run off before we can really get going and run for their lives.

Its okay Hugh you didn't have a shovel anyway.

Uh... Pretty sure thats a YOU job? Your the gym leader here.

However Roxie gives me the HM for Cut before running off.

Well Hugh guess we have a free HM now soooooo

Deep inhale through nose

Yeah okay.

Your lucky were friends Hugh.

The things I do for friendship.

Thats what I DOING! GAWD

Look its not like we're even going to find them! If they're really in a terrorist cell theres no way they're just going to be standing out in the open like a jackass saying "Come and get me Polly"

.... Bentley.

Go loose buddy.

Hey look its a purrloin.

And now its dead.

Just like old times. Old times being, like, the day before yesterday. Or whatever.

Aaaand the Plasma grunt runs away.

Hugh get her!

I... you... She ran RIGHT PAST YOU!

YOU HAVE A PIG WHO BREATHES FIRE!

wHaT... i DONt.... THIS IF YOUR VENDETTA!

oh please do tell

Okay she said they have a boat. Castelia City has a port. Hmm Okay.

I... we were JUST there Hugh! We'd have been better off just waiting in Virbank for them to come back and then jumping out at them from behind a trash can! Or dragging them into an alley to get info or something!

Arceus Dammit Hugh! This is YOUR revenge quest! I'm just tagging along cause Prof. Juniper asked me to complete... the... pokedex....

You know what Hugh, you uh, you go on ahead. I have some stuff I gotta... take... care of....

Shit shit shit how many pokemon do I have to catch?!

Ran into a shaking bush and caught an audino on the way to the pokemon center. Shove THAT into the PC for now, what else....

Route 19... Route 19 gotta start with route 19. Habitat mode dont fail me now!

GOT IT!

YOU. IN BALL. NOW

DANGIT YOU ARE NOT GETTING IN THE BALL

ARIES GT OUT THERE AND PARALYZE THAT CRETIN!

YES

IN BALL

CAUGHT

MOVING ON

DAMMIT OF COURSE THE FIRST PURRLOIN I FIND HAS LIMBER

AAAAAAAHHHHH

[allys-diary]

stories i om-nom-nom'd :: april 2024 (week 2)

I honestly didn't nom through too much because this week was mostly spent on my 'main' blog which is by the site's terms my side blog but let's be real, that's where I'm most active, it's my main blog 😤 Anyways, most of the week was spent reading through my friends' and fellow writers' stories and progressing my Tumblr TBR, writing my own stories, and also downloading and posting all the photos that came out this week from the events that Tom Hiddleston attended (legend has it, I'm still downloading).

As always, spoilers, thots, and thoughts all under the cut

documentaries

The Antisocial Network

I wasn't expecting this to take the turn that it did, documenting the butterfly effect of the creation of 4chan and how it snowballed into January 6, 2021. I ended up liking this a bit more than I expected going in, but I also have a little bit of an opinion…some of these guys really shot themselves in the foot revealing themselves to be a part of Anonymous because now…well they're kinda the opposite 🥴

Quiet on Set: Breaking the Silence

The check in with the people that were interviewed felt like a necessary part of the entire process, but honestly…there was something in the vibe of this episode's execution that felt off to me. It was like the host was putting on a performance like they were filming in front of a studio audience and the tone just felt like it was too chipper if that makes sense? Like you're supposed to be checking in on them and asking them how they've felt since the documentary came out and how their lives have been since, so why are you sounding like you're reading them today's headlines? Like I can't believe I'm even saying this but Trisha Paytas did better--

It just felt a little heavy-handed to me, but I can get behind the concept of having this follow-up episode that addressed the absolute garbage fire of a video that Foot Man put out into the internet trying to do damage control but honestly should've just been titled "Dan Schneider digs his own grave even deeper for 20 minutes straight".

books

games

Delicious: True Love

Stage 5, Day 1: Emily arrives back home to her restaurant/apartment in Snuggford and the poor beb's so heartbroken and hyper-focused on that, that she doesn't even notice there's a big gaping hole in the middle of her restaurant, with a burst pipe making an accidental water fountain. Patrick only sees her going upstairs to unpack and assumes that her trip went well and basically declares to her family and her best friend that now that she's got her love and she's happy, there's no more reason for him to stay.

Dude no, we've officially entered idiots in love stage. 😩

The day ends with Emily sobbing the second her mom goes up and checks in on her. I'm gonna say one more time for good measure, if OG story Jean-Paul has zero haters, I am dead.

Stage 5, Day 2: Emily's parents are worried about her since she hasn't come back down from her apartment, and Francois gives her some tough love telling her to at least show up for work because he won't make excuses for her absence. Nothing much happens on this day, since she goes straight back upstairs when the shift's over, other than her mom Evelyn basically saying she should have meddled in the beginning by never giving her the letter to begin with.

All I'm gonna say is…remake Evelyn is definitely the better Evelyn 🥴

Stage 5, Day 3: Patrick reveals that he's moving to New York since his business is growing and the new shop's gonna need his attention. Then Angela, Emily's little sister, shows up with puppies and asks her all about Paris, which causes Evelyn to shout at Angela rather than just calmly tell her that it's a sensitive topic (Clear to see where Evelyn's playing favorites). Angela leaves the restaurant but instructs one of the puppies to stay behind with Emily, which kicks off our side quest for this level where we call back the pup when he strays from Emily's side.

The day ends with Emily keeping the pup with her for a day or two, and talking to her mom about what happened in Paris.

Stage 5, Day 4: The big hole in the middle of the restaurant's all fixed, and it's bringing in more foot traffic to the restaurant. Emily makes a note to call to have the floors polished, mentioning she likes the floral scent, and Francois tells her that Patrick's moving to New York. He also accidentally kickstarts the dreaded miscommunication trope because he said "something about someone needing his attention there".

Gotta love them himbo besties 🥴

Stage 5, Day 5: Emily gets to see more of Patrick's green flag status when he tends to a kid that hurt herself when she tripped, taking the kid's mind off the pain and giving her a little flower and doing a magic trick. Then he confirms with Emily that yes, he's moving to New York because "it's time to move on", and I wanna bonk some heads together all over again. Francois tells her that she and Patrick have been flirting for so long that it's like "watching the same car crash on repeat" and he tells his therapist about it sometimes, and then accidentally breaks the vase that Patrick put a rose he set aside for Emily in, scattering marbles all over the floor and giving us our side mission for this level.

The day ends with Emily turning down an offer for a girls night out, and holding on to the rose from earlier.

Stage 5, Day 6: We officially unlock this stage's Entertainer, which is Francois with Emily's new puppy from Angela. Not much happens other than at the end of the day, the previous owner of the restaurant Mr Farrell visits the place to reminisce, and he talks about his "one that got away" because he was a teenage boy that fapped over Marilyn Monroe (my words, not his). Then one day when he finally came to his senses, the girl already stopped showing up at the restaurant.

Stage 5, Day 7: Emily's heart's finally starting to heal and she wakes up realizing that her apartment's a total mess ever since she got home and started her one-woman misery party. She still has the rose from Patrick at the center of her living area, and she reads a card that basically boils down to "Emily babes wake up your true love's been right in front of you literally giving you flowers every day". Unfortunately, that last scene from the previous day feels like heavy-handed foreshadowing because Patrick says goodbye to Emily after giving her one last delivery of fresh flowers for the restaurant.

The day ends with Mr Farrell bidding Emily and his old restaurant goodbye since he's moving to Florida to stay with friends, and a regular customer Gladys walks in looking for her purse, and wouldn't you know, it's Mr Farrell's TOTGA, and she moved back to Snuggford after her husband passed away so she could be closer to family. This makes Mr Farrell decide that he doesn't wanna move to Florida anymore.

Undercover: Blood Bonds

Chapter 10: Vera clocks in for the morning shift and finds Bluejay in Club with her pajamas on, finding out that she doesn't have a place to stay so she's been sleeping in the backroom. Vera offers her to move in so she doesn't catch a case for breaking in. At the end of the shift, Jericho reveals he has mind control powers and he used them to make Crystal exit the room before he ordered Mr Smirnov to get rid of Vera because she's asking too many questions.

Chapter 11: Vera meets up with Hank at a pub called Smokin' Wheels, and he tells her that Mr Smirnov's on a mission to get her sacked. Lilly's ex boyfriend Sam shows up and Vera spends that shift trying not to get noticed by Sam. At the end of the shift, we get a flashback of Sam being overprotective but concerned about Lilly coming home late and he pulls the "you're mine" card, while Lilly walks away going "You don't know anything".

Pretty sure the cops are wrong that Sam's the culprit and it's actually Mr Mind Control with the glowy red eyes Jericho that they should be looking up.

stories to om-nom-nom next

The Tortured Poets Department

I'm already sharpening a pitchfork with Joe Alwyn's name on it.

Hello Kitty Island Adventure: Imagination Celebration Event

I have no idea what this side story's gonna be, but all I know is that they made my precious bb Kuromi the villain of the event, and ngl I'm fuming. My sweet mischievous baby deserves better 😤

That's all for this week. See y'all next week unless I fall into a rabbit hole of planning out new stories for the WIP pile because I up and decided to Phase 1 plan for a "The Tortured Poets Department Collection" 🥴🫡

[askthefivefallen]

What would the ship name for Ass and Emily be? Emilass? Assily? Six winged ass?

A: "Pfft, A Mistake? Booty Call? Joyful Ass? Don't get ahead of yourself, Anon. Ain't no 'ship' here; I'm just fucking with Sera while I can. Can't dig my hole any deeper so I'm gonna have fun with it."

A: *briefly looks around* "But, in my head, it's Emiss. Because- let's be real- if Emily, the Light and Joy of Heaven, were to even think about gettin' with someone like me? That'd be a swing and Emiss." *short lived chuckle* "I think she had fun, though. I think she understands, now, why some folks just don't jive with how Heaven works. But that's probably wishful thinking on my part."

A: *clears throat* "Anyway, it doesn't matter. It was a one time thing because I happened to find a Seraphim willing to play along with my ruse- or too in her own head to think it was a ruse in the first place. Probably not gonna happen again. Sera's going to make sure of that, if she doesn't vaporize me immediately."

[feuqueerfire]

Strangers From Hell Live Blogging

I usually stick to my planned shows in a planner order but randomly wanted to watch something dark, so landed here even though it wasn't on my To Watch List.

Do wanna do a proper live blogging, so think I'll only do my favourite parts or things that give me a strong reaction

SPOILERS! I also know some spoilers like Lee Dong Wook's character is a cannibal dentist? or something and also he kills our main character or the other way around, I didn't register the names

Ep 1 (Jan 19)

was afraid we'd get a whole lot about gambling for a sec. Hate gambling in shows so bad omg

bruh is that a real gun or fake wtf girl I'm scared the "crazy man" is boutta kill "the pervert" while playing

lol on the nose with the You know the best part about living here? Nobody cares if anybody here dies

okay it's a fake with play bullets or something ig

damn, Jongwoo fucked up that guy who was beating up someone else bc he got flashbacks to his time in the army

damn someone made a hole to peep into Jongwoo's room

oh the quip about the "he's not stuttering right now" was leading up to the fact that they're twins. i was wondering if mans was faking it

So far, quite unsettling and I'm liking it. Also fun that Jongwoo can't quite tell what's going on or what's happening but we the audience also can't always tell what's really happening vs what's Jongwoo's imagination or dream (like the pervert just continuously saying 'should i kill you?' which was also when the ganster guy found the play bullet thing in his room which was real but it lead to Jongwoo's bloody dream so was the pervert part real?)

Anyway, time to go to bed because it's 12AM and I have to get up in 7.5 hours and I can't handle scary or unsettling things later at night

Things we know that Jongwoo doesn't:

The Pervert is making a hole or cutting the floor or whatever upstairs (in the 4th floor where nobody lives?)

There's a hole in his room that someone can see through

The dentist mans who isn't even involved in the story yet is fucked up

Ep 2: Human Nature (Jan 20)

I hope we stay mostly at the creepy weirdo apartment instead of Jongwoo's freaking workplace bc that gives me more anxiety and stress than the murders or whatever's boutta happen in the apartments

Everyone at this fucking place just has terrible dreams of death and murder, huh? including the gangster. anyway he wants to move out so I'm assuming he's gonna die soon. not to mention he's fucking going to the women's floor that's supposed to be off-limits and empty but the pervert's out there digging the floor there anyway

what the fuck a dead body with blood, how long has the fucking body been there

oh damn one of the twins struck the gangster down?

I wonder whether the landlord knows about the killings and weird happening on the 4th floor or not. her talking about how after the gangster leaves, only good people will be left was sus and creepy

so one of the twins deposited the dead cat?

okay so that specific twin (giggling, stuttering) killed one cat but the others were scorched and burned, so either his other twin killed them or it was the dentist

oh is that missing person poster of the guy who's dead and stored in the 4th floor?

hmm "that guy" that the twins keep talking about. the dentist?

Jongwoo's anger issues and uncontrolled outbursts is interesting because I originally thought he'd be very much the odd one out but he also has darkness in him (even if it's not cruel and sadistic like the other neighbors). like even though that was his imagination of standing up to the hyung boss man but when he beat up those guys in ep 1 was def an indication of what he's capable of

Okay so here's the thing right is the dentist and the "calm creepy" guy in the apartment the same guy? No? The dentist looks like Lee Dongwook (which he is) while the "calm" guy looks kinda like Lee Minho lmao. okay lmfao this whole time for some reason I thought the dentist and the smiley calm creepy guy were supposed to be the same person and kept getting confused that they literally didn't look alike and also was like why would a dentist be at that dingy place wtf but turns out they're unrelated. actually i guess the reason i thought they were the same was bc i knew the smiley guy was up to something weird and terrible for sure and thus thought he was the murderous creep dentist everybody kept talking about

That was hindi in the notebook of the old tenant guy? I saw a comment about how the old Pakistani tenant had a really sad backstory hmm

oh this lady is for sure in on the men making the tenants disappear

bruv, isn't he the police? he should be able to escape the chokehold imo

also the smiley guy is so ? why is he killing a detective or police officer or whoever like how are you gonna hide all of that

ohhh the dentist has a cult I see. In the volunteers I can spot the dentist, the twins, and the landlord lady but not the smiley calm guy though I guess he's one of the guys. will the police lady realize who's in the pics since she's seen one of the twins? Also, I rewatched the dentist and police convo and he mentioned meeting Mr. Park the other dentist at volunteer work, so is he also gonna be involved?

lmfao the convo on the roof with "like it?" "i thought you and i could be the same type of person" is so gay like that's how people talk about homosexuality and that's how confessions sometimes start in BLs. except this time it's murder and horrifying torture!

Things we know that Jongwoo doesn't:

The location of the gangster and also the previous Pakistani resident

Ep 3: A Secret Whisper (Jan 20)

kinda fun how casually the dentist strangles the smiley guy

Was the "I thought you and I might be the same type of person" just in the dentist's head? This show kinda reminds me of Midnight Motel in terms of showing the thoughts and scenarios in the characters' heads, though this is showing much darker scenarios and dreams generally

lmfao Jongwoo being so eager about crime fiction and writing about a murderer who kills the same way the dentist just killed lmfao so funny The Dentist falling in love with him or what and then Jongwoo being charmed by him due to the flattery oh silly man

oh that diary is so fucked. people definitely going into your room

somehow them actually burying a body (the police officer's? the smiley creepy guy's?) seems so mundane like ah yes the murderers must dispose of the body (though does the pervert's ankle bracelet track his location?)

What makes the people who live there just keep writing 죽어 repeatedly while in a trance-like state

let's go back to the dentist extracting the teeth bc that's better than the hell that is Jongwoo's internship bruv I really can't

oh lmfao the models in the dentist's office is made of real teeth i guess? or is he just storing them as fucking stones for rings he's made

oh okay so the landlord lady was a caretaker for the twins at the orphanage

pls the twin appearing closer when Jongwoo peaks out from behind the wall freaked me out + kept being nervous that somebody's behind Jongwoo

ah lmfao ofc the dentist is indeed behind Jongwoo

so do they put a dead cat toward the top and keep the body underneath?

what did the dentist feed Jongwoo ahh is it the gangster's corpse?? cannibalism? pls the dentist really just says what it is but makes it seem like an out-of-the-world idea like "oh i thought there was a body or something" in the bag and now asking if Jongwoo thinks it's human meat or something ew

Things we know that Jongwoo doesn't:

The creepy smiley guy and gangster are both dead and everybody else in the apartment is in on it

he ate human meat rip

Ep 4: Mental Derangement (Jan 21)

It's translated as something like it's delicious but the dentist uses the word 죽어 in it like "it's to die for" lmfao yeah that meat is to die for pun

girl, did Jongwoo's Sergeant in the army also eat human meat wtf or is it just his dreams and real life traumas getting mixed together

okayyyyy I was wondering if the dentist is only good and great with his patients (that one boy was doing great with him) but seems like he may have scared the girl in the car or she saw through him or something

fuckk when they were talking on the phone or texting they seemed meh but now that Jongwoo and his gf are talking irl and being cute, it's soooo endearing I'm

wow Jongwoo's workplace is really gonna kill me

So the landlady saw Jongwoo conversing with the police and the dentist may or may not have seen Jongwoo conversing with his gf (idk if that was jongwoo's imagination or not...)

damn, so the apartment duellers really fucking take people just off the streets to kill and eat? bruv, how are the police only now tentatively investigating them

oh so at least the bodies are being found even if nobody's connecting them with Eden Studio

the subs just completely ignore hyung and such even when JaeHo's like "stop calling me hyung at work" instead of dapyonim

naurrr miss police officer letting out too much about the cat deaths and goshiwon Eden Studio suspicions to the literal mastermind dentist behind it, hope you make it out of the show alive miss girl

What are the clues police lady has so far: the cat deaths near Eden studio, missing people from Eden studio, the twins' videotape - does she realize the woman was the landlady?, one of the twins was wearing the Pakistani guy's watch

The landlady ajhumma is kinda nervous around the dentist and even asked him if he'd kill her bc of her recklessness hmm

I like the shot of Jongwoo walking around the floor and encountering walls everywhere with so many voices in his head. I guess the ajumma fed him the drink to knock him out as they deal with 303 creepy guy's body

Ep 5: The Notebook of Malte Laurids Brigge (Jan 21)

oh my fucking bad, they talked about dealing with room 303 which is Jongwoo - he's supposed to be a replacement for 302 who was the creepy smiley guy

I hope there's a gifset of the parallels between everybody looking at smiling at Jongwoo and the pervert's altercation vs the gangster and the twins previously

bro what the fuck is the "are you filming me right now" "you looked pretty" exchange like evil gay dentist

dang, was the dentist tryna sus out Jongwoo's bloodthirst levels on the roof lol

rip Jongwoo sending home money and thus having less to move out

oof the landlady told the dentist about Jongwoo and the police officer, who the dentist was already ready to kill

the landlady really got the old lady to drink blood, I wonder who that is and why she wanted that health insurance

byee this annoying reporter hitting a nail on the head like maybe a serial killer lives in your goshiwon, imagine living next to a corpse, etc

the cop going everywhere, including the fourth floor, without backup is so alksdfj

the pervert following behind the cop and hiding when she turns around is so

fuckkkkkk the lady fucking escaped and everything only for her to run into the dentist instead of catching up to the cop fucking hell

oh was that thing that the landlady made the old lady drink not blood? I thought it was just terribly coloured blood but seems like it's "mushroom juice" that's lethal cuz that's how they're killing this street lady. i assumed the old lady had just been knocked out but is she dead too

lol so is the dentist fr following Jongwoo around. his practice is deserted and instead he's sending Jongwoo texts like "don't you just wanna kill him"

is Ji Eun really gonna cheat on Jongwoo with the boss man guy? pls T.T no

naurrr fuck Ji Eun now going to see Jongwoo at the Eden Studio but Jongwoo's drunk at the police station fucking fuck

ah shit the dentist has not met Ji Eun outside the studio

this show is making me so stressed

I think this is my fave episode so far, it's got so much suspense and Things Happening and stress

Ep 6: Lost (Jan 21)

lol I'm so dumb I keep reading the episode on-air threads on reddit or going through gifsets of the odd number ep before I finish the even number ep and so end up getting spoilers. I read the 5-6 on-air and learned that the dentist knifes one of the twins oof

T.T I don't want Ji Eun to go into the building T.T I can'ttttt I hope she doesn't die soon

well at least she's not dying this time but everybody's aware that she trusts the tenants so little that he'd bring the police to the place

no she's right like why does Jongwoo still stay here and I get her point like "there are people who are stranger than them although they don't appear to be" bc she might interpret Jongwoo's fear as ableism but like miss girl rip

Whose photo is that in the metamorphosis. Jongwoo and gf? so the dentist is the one who's been going into his room?

oh... that thump thump was from the dentist living on the 4th floor and bouncing that ball? I originally thought it was the pervert digging a hole on the fourth floor

girl why does Jongwoo just keep drinking the stuff the lady gives him alskdfj he knows her eggs are bloody at least, so he should be more suspicious of other stuff

The giggly twin saying the landlady is the scariest person in the whole place and the landlady saying she raised the dentist. okay inch resting, was this also at the orphanage

and so it's like the landlady was the original recruiter? and now the dentist is trying to recruit someone as well? he failed with the smiley creepy guy but now it's Jongwoo

damn, Jongwoo fr tempting all the tenants into killing him or what

oof that drink the landlady gave Jongwoo really had him go off the deep end ig it's mushroom juice, so hallucinogens? also i realized after reading reddit comments that the shots of her cooking has been her cooking these mushrooms to get the juice

oof you should've moved out without asking for any deposit back or anything Jongwoo

nahh how does the dentist have time to stalk not only Jongwoo but also the cop?

oh i see dentist was stalking Jongwoo and the cop also saw him

rip Ji Eun really thinks Jongwoo's just going through it but there's nothing wrong with the goshiwon

ohhh the insurance of that old lady was life insurance?

oh Jongwoo's paranoia is getting ramped upppp as he realizes Ji Eun doesn't believe him at all and he can't afford to more out. Mans bought a knife and is holding it behind his hand while talking to the new guy, giving me flashbacks to the pervert in earlier eps

ooh okay I was wondering whether the new guy is fr and he's gonna get killed soon or if he's also in on the scheme and seems like he is? I wonder if he's in that volunteering photo from Ep 2

girl Jongwoo's going up to the fourth floor with his knife while pervert and twins try to clan up a body?! T.T

man I really am gonna just not look at the fucking reddit posts or tumblr gifs before I finish ep 8 and 10 because knowing that the dentist is gonna knife the twin really took out so much anticipation out of this agh

interesting reaction from the tenants about the death though. the twin being scared but not wanting to die, the landlady being like ah he reached heaven first (cult vibes increased), dentist being frazzled

Ep 7: The Horror Of The Basement (Jan 22)

miss cop I hope your teeth hurt less

ohhh is she gonna connect the dots the name of the dental clinic Spring - the orphanage Spring - the dentist chair on 4th floor

do I trust this new guy Seok Yun?

ooh are we gonna get to see the backstory of the scars from like ep 3 or 4 when he went to take a shower

the pervert getting some girl's legging things ew

oh the cop has now seen the volunteering photo at the dentist's

okay yeah as expected the dentist is from the orphanage and sees the landlady as his mother

agh idk if i trust this new kiddd like Jongwoo realizing from the rap that their situations are similar is making me wonder if the new kid orchestrated it or not

oh the gangster's still alive? girl

rip the twin doesn't seem like he's taking his brother's death well

the new kid jumping to "oh do you think they're organ traffickers?" like hmmm you're too readily accepting

oof Jongwoo gonna think Ji Eun's cheating on him with the boss which... is she?

Jongwoo's so much more callous now, both with the new kid and the twin like he's got anger issues fr

the dentist is really so alksdfj like he just overhears Jongwoo's complaining and anger, corners him against the edge of the rooftop, tell him to hate/curse/kill the people he wants to, then is like oof you might fall

Jongwoo didn't close his door properly when he went to pee agh

ah fuck the landlady showing her scary side yikes and Jongwoo rampaging on the pervert's room to find the knife rip

oh damn Jongwoo's threatening the pervert with a small pair of scissors or something okay okay

lol as expected, the twin hid the knife from the pervert's room

What are we supposed to make of the new guy calling Jongwoo to tell the pervert was staring at him in the kitchen? Was he lying since he was in the stairwell or did it really happen and he just made the call after going to the stairwell?

damn, so Jongwoo's keyboard bashing is real?? since its on the CCTV?

Oh Jongwoo my guy really beating up the 3 kids who were boutta rock his shit. his anger and the physical manifestations of it

So in the PTSD military scene, Jongwoo beat up the guy who was beating someone up and was like ah... should've killed him. interesting, he's had violent tendencies since before

ofc the dentist finds the beaten up, bloody Jongwoo on the street after the fight - i bet the dentist is happy to see Jongwoo's instability and bloodlust

Ep 8: Voices That Choke Me (Jan 22)

oh shit I thought we were gonna get the story of how dentist met and indoctrinated the smiley creepy guy and so thought maybe it was him in the dentist chair but nopeeee our dentist is operating on Jongwoo rn

"What are you?" "What do you think I really am?" "What" "A dentist who lives in a goshiwon? Or a serial killed that you'd see in crime novels?" Also, I just realized that the dentist does indeed call them all Jagi he was like I can be anything Jagi-ga wants

Oh I like the cuts of him introducing himself to the smiley man vs Jongwoo

oh damn so many things are happening. the cop was investigating the parking lot where the detective disappeared/got murdered. Jongwoo and the dentist's conversation continued but we didn't get to see it. Jongwoo's now in the police station for beating up those kids and he's not talking

I don't understand the dentist, why is he appearing at the police station and saying he's gonna pay the parents on behalf of Jongwoo to settle like girl you're suspicious and you know the cop is suspicious of Eden Studio

oh nooo Jongwoo not talking and looking like :< poor boy what's going onnnn what'd the dentist do to his mouth or traumatize him or what

ah fuck Jongwoo's so fucked he mistook his shirt for a dead cat

It's kinda interesting that when Jongwoo's hearing voices in his head and shaking, it's not just the tenants of this apartment but also his military and work and girlfriend's voices

I loveee that Jongwoo used to have so many violent imagined scenarios before that now when he does do actual violence, like breaking the keyboard earlier and now beating his coworker like I kept being like is it real for real?

Jongwoo's so spaced out, just blank behind the eyes

oof another case of Jongwoo smilingand saying "I should've killed him"

ooh the anesthesia in the string is often used in dental settings + the DNA may be from the missing detective

damn ngl the boss hyung doing more to understand Jongwoo than I would, I'd just fire and avoid him

Gonna fucking eat glass, this is one of my fave scenes

(Fave Scene) Boss hyung trying to be understanding -> Jongwoo getting angry at boss and trying to fight him after Ji Eun shows up and being full of emotion -> the dentist showing up and Jongwoo deflating and being scared and trying to move away + moving Ji Eun back -> the dentist goading the boss hyung and also speaking to Jongwoo about half the time even though he's speaking about the dentist and ofc the boss hyung ready to fight -> Jongwoo being scared that the dentist is gonna do something and so Jongwoo stepping in to take the dentist outside bc he's afraid the dentist would do something to the boss and/or Ji Eun ig

lmao the dentist revealing that he was stalking Jongwoo when he saw Ji Eun get out of the boss hyung's car and saying he knows Jongwoo wanted to kill the man then ahh psychological warfare

ask;ldfj ahh I'm so fully convinced the dentist is like in love with Jongwoo bc wtf is urging Jongwoo to kill the boss hyung and when he doesn't, following him to the office and injecting him bc ig he hurt Jongwoo? Dentist even says "Ah, I'm not usually this impulsive. Jongwoo-ssi is very special to me. He's special to me."

also the reporter's seeing all this okay interesting i wonder if he's gonna make it out alive and tell the tale or if he's gonna be spotted cuz his phone goes off or the dentist goes to take the CCTV tapes or something

oh the dentist is calling someone to clean up, i guess it's the pervert and twin?

oh you reporter fucker why are you in your car in front of the Eden Studio after following a murderer there and talking on the phone all chill with the windows down be fucking serious

hmm the alive twin is interesting. what'd he do to the officer did he let him go? he didn't mention him to the dentist and also he gave the dentist some attitude

okay I was suspicious of the new guy for quite a while but I guess he's also unaware of anything actually going on lol anyway, he's eating the human flesh so happily, I wonder what the dentist thinks of him and whether he'll take a liking to him like he recruited smiley creepy and is trying Jongwoo or if they'll just eat him. Also they love saying it's human meat and laughing about it haha

naur the new guy's exploring the fourth floor? oh yeah i remember he also called Jongwoo this ep or last ep saying he smelled blood from there oh my guy

also is the body in the bag the boss buying or reporter’s?

aw poor new guy, you had no chance of going undetected. might survive if you’re a fucked it murderer too tho

My new favourite episode ahh like just the inability to realize whether Jongwoo was beating up the supervisor for real and then the restaurant conversations were both sooo good

Ep 9: Cognitive Dissonance (Jan 23)

oh shit he mistokk Ji Eun for the dentist and litrally held up a knife to her fuck. also on reddit someone said on the preview apparently the dentist kidnaps her so...

miss girl looking for the missing car and stuff in the fucking forest where the guys go to bury bodies or whatever ah sigh will you make it out of this story alive i wonder

oh fuck Jongwoo going back to Eden Studio because he realizes something's up with the new guy agh

oh fuckkkkkkk so??? is the new guy now in on it too???? has he been converted to being a murderer so easily? or is he being held at knifepoint to convince Jongwoo

ah shit new guy crying and bleeding as he begs Jongwoo to stay rip

I hate this detective fucker's condescension sooo much, whether it be because she's a cop not a detective or bc she's a woman

I guess the cop doesn't know that Jongwoo works at this place either rip

Also the body was still at the crime scene but the CCTV was deleted, so was the "clean up" deleted the CCTV but keeping the body there bc the disappearance would be too suspicious otherwise or what. Also who was in the body being carried at the end of Ep 7 then? The reporter?

So the twin has some SD cards? camera memory? idk what that's for. But he spoke to the reporter... was that just to play around before killing him or did he give the reporter an actual scoop and is happy that the serial killer gonna get busted as revenge for his brother

damn the dentist gonna send the new guy's tooth to Jongwoo?

lol the landlady taking the woman praying in the first floor out of the building

so the murder team is also planning on leaving Eden Studio

the twin letting new guy try to escape and even singing red light green light song... this was before Squid Game came out but it's giving me flashbacks

lmfao naurr not the landlady finding the new guy and pretending to not know anything and hide him agh this game is so fucked

poor new guy just keeps getting caught between murderers like it's so horrifying all i can do is laugh

REPORTER GO WORK AT A FUCKING CAFE mans writing his story about the murders in his car like 2 feet away from where the murders happen with his window down and no awareness of his surroundings.

lmfao pls the shot panning to let us see the dentist reading out the window and nodding along is killing me

Also, I wonder if the dentist knows that the twin gave the info to the reporter

oh Jongwoo keeps looking everywhere because he thinks the dentist is gonna show up

ah fuck Jongwoo should've 100% told Ji Eun that Jae Ho was dead as soon as he found out bc that'd make her be careful of the texts and even grant him some credibility that the dentist killed him (though she could also think that Jongwoo killed him lol) but now the dentist is getting to her

noo this army guy also going to Eden Studio? like girl no have him stay and call for backup so that he doesn't die too

Ep 10: Gas-lighting (Jan 23)

I should be studying right now and give myself the last ep as a reward afterwards but uhhh I don't wanna wait, I need to know the ending now

Another hour before this is over hmm I wonder how this'll end. I guess from that one comment on MDL, one of them kills the other (Jongwoo to Mun jo bc it's supposed to be happy ending) but also there are theories about the ending on reddit, so I guess it'll be ambiguous. I'm just hoping that it's not all in Jongwoo's head though, I feel like this would be rated lower if it was and there wouldn't be theories and I would be spoiled about it by now

the title is gas-lightning I wonder if it'll just be about everyone convincing Jongwoo that he's going crazy or... a pun? will there be a fire? The orphanage and 4th floor both burned down and we saw the twin with a gas bottle thing

pls the way the dentist always appears so humorously is gonna kill me like the other two pointing and him and even saying 'ja jan!' as he slides into frame

damn the dentist is beating the shit outta Jongwoo

ooh, are they gonna frame Jongwoo for the murders?

After reveal: Okay I thought that the dentist was gonna get Jongwoo to kill his friend or something and also the smile made me question if he was gonna somehow frame Jongwoo with the tooth bracelet but then since we didn't see him for a longass time, I'd briefly wonder about what he was doing but not dwell on it

okay at least the cop picked up the phone before getting knocked out so that the other cop heard the commotion

lol the landlady really got pissed off about the pervert first fucking with the thug and now the cop when they're in her jail cell

This is the funniest screenshot of all time: all those knives and the one she will choose is blurred

damn we really had Mun jo kill the landlady

and the surviving twin is no more

what's Munjo's end goal here exactly

oh Munjo still wants Jongwoo to join him? Or is he just lying

I can't see their fight properly in the dark

"the human instinct to gnaw on the weak and enjoy as the weak suffer" - k ig that's Munjo's motivation or lack thereof

After reveal: so that's what the dentist meant when he said "you enjoyed seeing the people from the studio die" bc I was like the victims?? but no Jongwoo killed the murderers

"Of course, jagi you are the best masterpiece I've ever created" because Jongwoo promises him a most painful death just before he kills him. Though what does he mean by now jagi and I will be together forever... girl is he gonna haunt him or will they run away together

oh actually these detectives needa die I'm not satisfied until this man apologizes to the cop and she stomps on their heads

oh framing?????? or what like what's going on why is the gangster saying it's Jongwoo. oh i see nevermind he's saying the others tried to murder him

hmm what are they investigating right now, why is the detective saying that the landlady killing the pervert is odd? Also they keep kinda slightly bringing up the vacation rental family being murdered probably by the Eden Studio murder gang but why now... did we even hear about it before

ohhh so is it like what we saw with Mun jo killing the lady and the lady killing the pervert not true? An amateur like Jong Woo did it?

brooo okay yknow I thought the thing with the dentist calling the twin stupid was so Jongwoo-lite, turns out it was Jongwoo

hmmm okay so idk I guesssss Jongwoo did kill the dentist, him and the cop seeing him around is just hallucinations and paranoia (including when he was alive and well and touching his adam's apple after all the murders bc Ji Eun saw that there was nobody else there), but Jongwoo now knows what it's like to kill someone and the "honey and i will be together forever" comment is meant to signify that Jongwoo is the dentist's masterpiece and the glitch at the end

Also, what happened to Jongwoo's friend - just an unmentioned casualty?

Here's why I think Moonjo is dead:

I think Jongwoo did kill Moonjo and afterwards came back to his room and had hallucinations with repeating sentences from their last conversation. The girlfriend saw nobody there and Jongwoo has previously had hallucinations in the mirror about the boss hyung's death like "It wasn't me!" Additionally, the scene was just his last words from the death scene + Adam's apple grab as seen before, so it was like Jongwoo's knowledge of what Moonjo would say or do, not really Moonjo

Everybody accepts that Moonjo is dead, so I'll assume they found the body tbh

I'll assume Jongwoo was hallucinating him after they got out of the building and I'll assume the cop was as well because she saw him in a crowded elevator and I feel like he would've been recognized since they family's been in the news now

There is a sense of "somebody's watching" the cop as she gets in the car at the end but to me, it's once again a manifestation of the cop's paranoia because we also get to see as if someone's watching from the backseat of her car and she turns back to find nobody there.

It's just more satisfying and scarier to me to assume that Moonjo's dead but he lives on in Jongwoo's personality and also Jongwoo and the cop's paranoia - he's haunting them and that's how Moonjo and Jongwoo will be together forever. He's a terror that is gone now but he's irrevocably tainted others, and made Jongwoo his masterpiece and final work of creation.

Overall Thoughts:

I'm not as blown away or enraptured by the ending as everybody else seems to be but I thought it was good and expected. The whole descent of Jongwoo was interesting to see, as well as how his environment and people around him made him who he is and what he had in him from previous experiences and by nature.

The acting and cinematography/atmosphere were good. I liked the hallucinations/dreams (I loved it when I couldn't tell whether he really was breaking the keyboard until the CCTV showed it or whether he was beating up the supervisor until the others came in bc he had violent imagined scenarios so often) and I'm glad it was just 10 eps.

I do like to think Moonjo's obsession was tinted with gayness but the cursory glance at tiktok/twitter shipper posts isn't giving me what I want - it's too ironically cutesy but I like that Moonjo is darkly obsessed and Jongwoo hates it so bad. I've been obsessed with going through people's archives for the strangers from hell tag and reblogging them though lol

I like that he's dead but still alive through Jongwoo; that even if he was killed, he still won.

Rating: 7.5/10

Tiktoks:

Moonjo couldn't have done it w/o me

Immortal He, Return to me - mostly for the comments who get that he's physically dead but lives on through Jongwoo

Moonjo/Jongwoo except it's accurate dynamics where Moonjo is all up in his space and Jongwoo wants to escape

Moonjo vs Jongwoo like cannibal/doesn't like human meat, encourages him to kill people/kills people, etc (jwdscore)

[swordbreakerz]

Day 15: time is long

I wrote a love letter about my weird timeline listening to friends at the table that is very rambly and doesn't have much of a point and is a little personal and I'm putting it under a readmore because I'm shy and going to throw my phone into the ocean after this posts

This July marks a full year since I got back into friends at the table. I watched the NNAF stream live, the first day at work since it was my last day (what were they gonna do, fire me?), and the second day at home, half dozing through the first three hours because I wasn't used to being up at 9am on a Monday. The Marielda one shot and stretch reward of a Hieron epilogue finally piqued my interest in that campaign, and I started Autumn in Hieron the next day.

It had been probably a year and a half since I'd listened to any day at that point, back in October 2020 (the 23rd, to be exact, according to my discord DMs) a friend of mine got me interested and I started listening to COUNTER/weight. I blew through it in a couple weeks, finishing it on November 17th, and it has the high honor of being one of the only pieces of media to make me cry after finishing it before I was medicated. I jumped straight into Twilight Mirage, but only made it about halfway before I quit the job I'd been working, and fell off of it, because I'd been using my 8hr shifts to burn through episodes. Despite quitting my job Again just as I was getting back on though, last year it stuck and I caught up with the entire backlog of podcast, including Bluff City, in maybe… four or five months if I remember right? It truly caught me by the throat.

Now, I'm fully caught up and staying on top of weekly releases better, being employed helps so I have a dedicated task to do while listening. It's become a regular fixture of my life and I've been thinking about voices defining a time in your life, and how summer 2022 will forever be my summer of friends at the table. The friends were my constant companion, I listened to the least amount of music that year than I maybe ever have, my spotify wrapped minutes on music were dwarfed by the nearly ~700 hours of podcast (spotify is easier to binge with at work, and I like stats).

This podcast reignited my creativity and drive after an art slump and brought me closer with one of my cherished friends, it taught me things about storytelling and political theory, it forced me to process old grief while sobbing for two hours straight after finishing Marielda. I could probably keep going, but being vulnerable makes me want to dig a very deep hole and lie in it forever, and honestly if any of the cast does see this I think I might die if I put anything too personal in it.

I'm not sure where the point I was leading to went. This podcast is like a reliable clock (hah) to me. It's my Friday work treat when seasons are live, Animal Out of Context can lull me to sleep in less than 30 minutes, Orbital made me laugh so hard I nearly cried in front of my coworker. Having something become such a north star in your life, especially something close to the ground like this, is fun and weird and scary all at the same time. I went from barely paying attention to ttrpg news to The PBTA Guy in my friendgroup in a matter of months. I still cry if I think about The Chime or Hella or Maelgwyn or Fero or Lem too hard. I'm getting a tattoo based on C/W at some point for gods sake.

Anyway. It's amazing how time and passion can worm it's way into your heart. Keep telling stories, keep loving eachother, I'm going to go dig a deep hole now, mwah

[ipusingularitae]

no like let me vent a little bit here

i truly don't appreciate how some therapy lines are so extreme in the sense of only investigating/handling your behavior or just acting like it's something merely in your head that you can't escape from from the minute you were born

last appointment my therapist said that we needed to start investigating for a possible disorder and even considering medication. here's the deal: i had leukemia when i was a child. I've spent my first childhood in the hospital and i don't even know the amount of shit i still have to unpack. I'm 20 now, and i couldn't be more against taking medications as much as i understand how they can be useful

the aspect of investigating my behavior, trying to stablish new ones, trying to find the origins of my pains is very valid. but i don't think many therapists understand how fucking scary it is to even consider changing the way you see the world, the way you exist. because for someone like me, who has developed so many coping mechanisms and strategies to literally live, taking meds and suddenly changing some stuff messes with my world-viewing. it's not just oh stopping to feel anxious. it's the prospect that i don't know myself entirely and before i can do it, i need to change. i don't wanna be a stranger to myself because the moment this happened i felt like everything was crumbling down and I'd rather die than live one more day

what some therapy lines don't seem to grab is the fact that i take something out of my existence. it's not just behaviors or some internal shit that happens independently of me, but maybe all of this and more. i think about it, i have thoughts and feelings and there are results, products and fruits of my existence. and when I'm in that room or, shit, when I'm studying in college that doesn't seem to matter. it's not just "i don't wanna go out", it can be "i don't wanna go out and i have thoughts and feelings about it. i may simply not want to go out, but I'm irritated because there are other people pushing me to do so", or a thousand other experiences

idk, i feel like it's fucking crazy. because, again, it's valid to change behaviors and beliefs but... you haven't even asked me what i take from it. you want me to take medication but do you know how i feel about some of my behaviors? or about how other people react to my behaviors (that a lot of times are just normal and harmless and messes with anybody but me)?

it seems empty. shallow. scrapping the surface. and this is important but it's also not enough

at the same time, having people digging and digging in your psyche it's also useful sometimes. but look around. you're digging this hole but you're not looking around to see what I've build on top of that core, and that matters too. it's like you're going so fucking deep and looking for hidden meanings, but damn sometimes the hidden meaning don't even matter that much

anyways, I'm just thinking. i need to find out what am i gonna do about this, but I'm still wandering and putting pieces together

[lastoneout]

Thank you to everyone leaving kind words and advice in the comments, I really appreciate it <3 I cried a lot and ranted with my fiance for a while about how BS this was and between that and the assurance from everyone that this is indeed the most bull-est of shit ever I feel a lot better now. I looked up the info of the place I bought my rollator at back in 2018 and they have lightweight and ultra-light wheelchairs for sale and people who can help fit you for one correctly. I'm going to go down there this weekend and see what they can do for me and how much it's gonna cost, and then start trying to get the money together to just buy one myself. It's going to be hellishly expensive but I can't keep living like this, if I have to set up a gofundme or go into debt so fucking be it, I want my life back. I want to go to school so I can maybe get a job and eventually buy a house and have a fucking kid and get married instead of just spending every single day in pain with no help because apparently disabled people aren't supposed to do anything other than lay around and suffer.

They also offer rentals so I might be able to even try one out which would be great since I wasn't kidding about that whole "there are holes in my clothes" thing I REALLY need new shorts, but yeah that's the game plan. I'm also going to dig up my old physical therapy exercises and start doing them again, and maybe try to get my hands on a second hand exercise bike so I can make sure I don't let my legs atrophy or whatever. (It's SO wild too because like, at physical therapy they always focus on building my CORE muscles, I don't do that many leg exclusive things, most of it is building core muscles and you know what fucking builds your core??? Wheeling yourself around in a fucking wheelchair. I'm not getting an electric scooter, I'm getting a manual wheelchair and using it will help with what PT already wants me to do, BUILD UP MY CORE MUSCLES, like???? Jesus fucking Christ.)

And like tbh I'm not even that upset that she said no, I expected her to say no, I'm mad that she AGREED with me TO MY FUCKING FACE and then left the room only to have some other guy come in a reveal actually she didn't agree with me at all and I'm not getting any of the things I asked for. It wouldn't have stung as bad if she hadn't gotten my hopes up. For a small moment I felt so fucking happy and relieved and then it all got dashed against the rocks. She even told me I have a good head on my shoulders about all this and have a great plan to increase my mobility while still keeping my body strong and how she's impressed I was able to do all that despite the pain I was in!! And like I was proud of myself!! I believed her!! But now I don't even know how much of that was true. It was SUCH a massive slap in the face. I cannot believe that's how they fucking treat patients. Honestly, it's borderline inhumane imo. How the fuck do they live with themselves treating people like that??

And that's my real issue, it's the fact that I'm not being treated like a person with bodily autonomy who can give informed consent. Despite the fact that they only see me like once a year so they actually have no idea what I'm like outside their office they automatically don't trust me to keep up with my physical therapy and at home exercises to keep my legs strong. They automatically don't trust me to only use my wheelchair on the days I really need it, despite the fact that I already only use my rollator on the days I need it. I'm not being treated like an adult who can make informed decisions about what is right for my body, who can reasonably be expected to do what's needed to have a wheelchair and not give up on walking forever, or at least be allowed to recognize the risks of having a wheelchair and decide it's worth it anyway. I'm being treated like a stupid child who is so lazy she'll surely give up walking forever the minute she touches a wheelchair. I'm being treated like a child who can't even be trusted to be mature when a doctor tells me no, she couldn't even respect me enough to be honest with me, she had to go get help to tell me no after LYING to my fucking FACE about her thoughts on the matter.

It's structural ableism. I'm not a person to them. I'm a stupid crippled idiot who is too lazy to do the work needed to stay healthy so I have to keep suffering and not spending time with my friends and family or cooking or going to the store or doing anything because I should spend all of my time either suffering or recovering from suffering. They didn't even have the decency to treat me like a fucking human being when they tell me they won't help me.

But that's fine, I guess. I'm gonna take shit into my own hands, just like I always have. I only hope the next person gets treated better than I did.

the doctor said no to a wheelchair in the cruelest way possible

[janshu]

Inu!Bakugo...for @ultimate-astridwriting's Hybrid collab!

Summary: My part of the hybrid collab. I had so much fun writing an angry Pomeranian Bakugo. 10/10 would do again. I'm not completely happy with it but who ever is? I'm still proud of myself!

Word count: 2.2k.

Warnings: Fem!Reader, Bakugo being an ass, sexual content, somnophilia, collars, choking, humping, creampie, name calling (bitch, slut, whore etc.), use of the word cunt.

You sigh as you rummage around in your pocket to produce the key to your home. After a long day's work all you want to do is get some dinner, take a bath and go to bed but none of those things would be possible would they?

No, not after the spur of the moment decision to adopt a hybrid of all things. The week earlier was one of torrential downpours and near freezing temperatures, the roads making a slushy substance of half-melted ice and salt to prevent the very thing it was being mixed in with. People stayed indoors the best they could when they weren't at work but life had to shit on you and make your car breakdown in the parking garage. Umbrella rested on your shoulder, rain boots on your feet with your spare in your bag and you trudged through cold, mushy hell back home. The streets were barren as a Walmart on a weekday at 4am, no life passing by you until you crossed an alley between two businesses. A pathetic whimper had caught your attention and your gaze drifted down to a soaked cardboard box. What was in that box you weren't sure if you should curse or love. A hybrid.

Narrow red eyes stared at you in suspicion, fangs bared at you but the creature didn't make any attempts to nip at your fingers when they neared to ruffle the spikey head of hair. The hybrid had leaned into your touch before recoiling away as if you had smacked him. The black and orange collar had seen better days, the charm that dangled on the hollow of his neck read "Dynamite" but he didn't give any indication that was his name when you repeated it outloud. He was barely dressed in anything, a thin t-shirt, shorts with ragged Converse that had more holes than Swiss cheese. Truthfully he looked a few days away from starvation and how could you keep that on your conscience if you left him there? After laying your warm coat over his shoulders you somehow, someway, managed to get him back to your place. Everything went downhill from there in the blink of an eye.

The weak puppy persona was gone the moment warm food settled in his belly and within the hour he acted as if you had crowned him king of the house. Beginning his rambles of curses, demands and biting at your fingers. The worst of it happened when you tried to take his collar off for a new one, one that wasn't frayed and barely hanging on. "Katsuki" as he spat out his name with enough venom to put a Black Mamba to shame had flipped over a coffee table, ripped up every couch cushion and went so far to chew on the linoleum on the kitchen floor.

No doubt you'd be greeted with the same sight as always. Messy, dirty, unknown stains everywhere and dishes still in the sink waiting to be moved to the washer. Maybe if he wasn't such a loud ass you could train him but your frazzled nerves were at their wits end. You didn't know what to do, you were about to throw in the towel and put him up for adoption. Yep, you were disappointed to be proven right. Katsuki reclining on the couch lengthwise, remote in his hand with the most bored expression on his face while idly flipping through channels.

"Fucking finally, you're home! I've been waitin' for fucking hours for your ass to get back! I'm hungry, get your shitty ass in the kitchen and make dinner." He barked. Barely giving you any time to hang up your coat and slip off your shoes before his orders began.

"Katsuki...I can't, not tonight." Could your voice portray anymore pleading? Apparently not because he didn't seem to notice, or care.

The fluffy ear at the top of his head only flicked in response, the top lip curling into his signature snarl. "Then what the fuck are you good for? Get your fucking ass in that god damn kitchen and fucking make dinner already."

All that you were good for? All that you were good for? How dare he! He's been freeloading off you for a week now without so much as a thanks for saving him from the streets, feeding him, clothing him, keeping him warm and dealing with his bullshit and this is how he repays you?

"I've fucking had it with you!" Your voice rose higher than you meant to but at this point you didn't care, a line had been crossed. "You fucking sit there and ruin my shit and yet I'm the useless one? I have half a mind to kick you out! You can make your own fucking dinner, I've had it! I'm done! I can't take this anymore!"

Despite not having any clunky shoes on your feet still managed to resonate in the small living room while you stormed past the couch. You had expected anything, anything at all. A slap, a punch, a groan, literally anything but you were met with only silence and that somehow pissed out off even more. How could silence be so infuriating?! You didn't even notice the terror that washed over his face as you screamed at him or the way his chest heaved with the sob or how he trembled underneath your wrathful gaze as you walked away. The bedroom door slamming made short work of that.

"Fuck I'm such an ass.." You mused to yourself already regretting blowing up at him but what would an apology do that wasn't already broken? So better yet why not send yourself to bed without dinner as some kind of punishment? He'd linger at the doorway to the kitchen, staring at you with those intense eyes if you made dinner anyways so why let him win? He could his own shit for fucks sake!

After a quick shower to dethaw your bones and warm up what was left of your dead soul the softness of your pajamas helped ease the guilt gnawing away like a puppy on its first bone. Laying in bed until sleep eventually overcame you and when he knew it was safe to slip in and sneak over towards your bedside.

Rustling was what woke you. The rustling of clothes and the jingle of something metallic in the darkness of the bedroom. Whatever grogginess you normally suffered when waking up was vanishing the more details were dissected and understood by your half-asleep brain, a process that took an embarrassingly long time. Clothes rustling, the bedsheets moving, heavy pants and something incredibly warm nudging up against the sensitive skin of your inner thighs. Naturally your brain assumed the worst and your eyelids flew open to show nothing; at first. As your eyes adjusted to the pitch black room they found the blazing stare of those vermillion eyes, the bared fangs that belonged to your hybrid.

What the hell was Katsuki doing on top of you?

Noticing that you were awake the snarl turned into a smirk as he huffed, his large chest expanding with each desperate pant. Why did your folds feel so good just as you were waking up?

"Feel that?" How could you not? The feel of a scorching cock bumping up your folds and sensitive clit, wet from the pre leaking from the tip. There was so much of it from what you could feel, too sticky to be your own. His hips had yet to cease moving, no word from your shocked form to still his rutting hips.

"W-what the hell are you doing?" Was the most logical question your brain could come up with in the moment.

"Humping...fucking dumbass." His warm breath created goosebumps on your cool skin, his head must've been so close to yours by the hair tickling your forehead. "Tryin'ta...help ya. Shitty woman.."

"Help? How the fuck is this helping?"

"You've been working so hard so I thought maybe...a good fuck would calm ya down, relax ya." Katsuki's voice was so desperate, so needy, the humping of his cock on your labia increasing.

He was trying to help? He was going to fuck the frustration out of you? Is that was he was offering? Having sex with a hybrid was common enough to not be considered taboo but you couldn't help but feel he was trying to worm his way into your good graces. Unless your words had struck some kind of cord with him. "Okay, alright, I'll let you help."

"Fuck yeah!"

With that the head of his cock nudged against your cunt, already spread and waiting for him. How long had he been doing this for? The burn of the stretch was delicious, he was just big enough to fill you up but not hurt. Settling right up to kiss the tip of your cervix when he bottomed out. His hands grip at your thigh and hip, pulling his back to slam his cock right back into you. Over and over, over and over, over and over. Practically using you as a fleshlight to get himself off but damn if it didn't feel good, him bouncing you on his cock so roughly each thrust was sending the headboard against the wall.

"Oh fuck...oh fuck, Katsuki!" Your hands pat around and eventually find his biceps and you cling on for dear life, your nails digging crescent shaped markings into his skin.

"Yeah, yeah...you like this form of stress relief, don'tcha you dirty slut?" Undoing the collar around his neck the frayed cloth of the strap is tied around your neck, the buckle clamping down tightly to constrict your airflow while two fingers slip under it to pull and tug. "You're my dirty fucking slut! Mine...mine...mine...mine, fucking mine!"

Your fingers trailed down the tiny amount of space between your bodies down to the precious, neglected nub between your legs. Barely able to wiggle your index and middle finger down there from the rabid fucking you were receiving to circle the bundle of nerves and send yourself over the edge. Each clap of your thighs smacking against each other forcing your hate for his behavior ebbing away. If he was going to act like this all the time how could you kick him out?

"F-fuck! Gonna cum...fucking cum..cum for me. Cum with me!" Katsuki snarled as the pressure around your throat increased. Your hand was smacked away from your clit and was replaced with the large pad of his thumb, frantic circles sending your body into a writhing mess of flails and kicks.

The orgasm that had been steadily building from your ministrations had been ripped away and replaced with one quickly approaching to push you over the edge. The white hot pleasure-coil that formed underneath your belly button snapped and all of it coursed through your system in one go. Paralyzing your body for a split second as you squirted all over the hybrids cock, his still rubbing hand sending the liquid everywhere. Coating his thighs, your thighs and the bed underneath you.

"Fucking fuck! Such a whore, such a dirty girl for me! Oh my fucking g-god!" One last slam of his hips and his own body stilled, burying his cock deep inside your cunt to shoot his cum deep in your womb. He stuttered before his body collapsed on top of you, suffocating you in his sweaty muscles.

Bathing in the afterglow, coming down from your high you could've sworn you heard something. Mumbling, soft mumbling too indistinct to understand. Katsuki's head laying on your shoulder, his nose brushing along your collarbone and was he laying kisses here and there? No, you must've been seeing things. Still buried to the hilt he turned his head to speak, his fluffy ears perked and his tail gently swishing behind him. The sudden light from your phone illuminated the room, casting light on Katsuki's face and the sight made your breath hitch in your throat. Clearly he had been crying. Tear stains streaked down his cheeks, brows knitted together and the same lost look he had plastered on his face appeared again.

"Please, please don't kick me out. I'll do anything, please...please don't abandon me. Not again." His arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer as he hid his face in your neck. Voice breaking, shoulders trembling, the verge of crying all over again quickly approaching.

Your heart broke and you returned the favor by hugging him around the shoulders, a hand carding through his hair to soothe him. Had he been abandoned? Did his previous owners not like him? Was all his aggressiveness some kind of defense mechanism? Was he giving you a reason to kick him out to keep himself from experiencing that kind of pain again? Oh, poor baby. "Never again...just don't destroy things anymore, okay? Help me around the place a little more will ya?"

"Yes." Katsuki snuggled on top of you. Finally believing he had a real home with you, a place where he could belong. "....Master."

[queen-ofsunflowers]

Five bucks says that junpei will mention the Kyoto incident while drunk one time. Wonder what the investigation team and Phantom thieves will react to that?

Actually, I think the closest that the Phantom Thieves come to learning about what happened in the hot springs in Kyoto was in the original draft for Strikers when I have Minato and Ryoji tagging along.

I'm not exactly sure how to put what happened, but I do have the scene saved still from when I wrote it down, that’s gonna be under the cut. All you need to know is that it leads to some Zenkichi bullying.

Anyway, I’m not sure at this point if the Phantom Thieves will learn about what nearly happened in Kyoto for S.E.E.S. But if the latter learns about what happened to the former, Minato’s going to fall out of his seat laughing about it.

(Note: this is shortly after the Sapporo Jail, as everyone’s driving to Kyoto so Zenkichi can meet with Akane.)

Minato: We and Kyoto have a... history. Let's leave it at that.

Ann: ...you guys are banned from entering Kyoto, are you?

Ryoji/Minato: No.

Ryoji: Just... memories, that's all. We went there for our class trip in high school.

Minato: Yeah. You wanna explain or should I?

Ryoji: It was a few weeks after Minato and I got together. All we wanted was to spend some time with each other because we were always around the others -- the people we live in the dorms with -- didn't exactly know yet. However, circumstances led us to sneaking around even more up until the point where we got caught in the hot springs--

Minato: They do NOT need to know that part!

Ryoji: It's important to the context of the story!

Goro: I'd rather not hear about your high school sex stories.

Minato: It is NOT like that! That's not what happened! We got caught--!

Zenkichi: ...Wait. Wait, wait. Wait! Arisato, Mochizuki, you two are--?! (A beat, some of the Thieves start chuckling.)

Minato: Yes, Inukichi. The gays do exist. Just like your so-called monsters and magic.

Ryoji: Ignore his sarcasm. But yes, we are dating. Have been for seven years now. Why? What did you think we were?

Zenkichi: Amamiya called you his COUSINS.

Ren: Biologically speaking, the only one I'm related to is Minato. He and Ryoji have been dating for so long, that my family has just sorta adopted him into ours. I've been calling him my cousin too since I think... sixth grade?

Ryoji: Just about.

Zenkichi: You introduced Arisato as your PARTNER.

Ryoji: Yes. That's usually what you would call your significant other. At least in our case.

Zenkichi: No, when you said he was your partner, I just-- ...*sigh* You know what? Nevermind, I'm just digging myself into a deeper hole!

Futaba: If it makes you feel any better, Zenkichi, no one here is straight so you missed the mark on all of that!

Zenkichi: It does not!

[bruhstories]

Flowers and Vinyls

Summary: You and Porco are neighbours. You also despise each other. Pairing: Porco Galliard x Fem!Reader (modern AU) Warnings & Content: language, softdom!Porco, softsub!Reader, thigh riding, unprotected sex, spanking, oral sex (male receiving), alcohol abuse, enemies to lovers Word Count: 2.2 k

A/N: Porco deserves some love, too! I also really wanna give Connie some love, too.

You hated him, you loathed him.

To you, Porco was the most insufferable person to ever walk on this earth, strutting his pushed back hair, with his stupid undercut and his silly little upturned nose. You wanted to gouge his eyes out, but that would only land you some time in jail. He was your next-door neighbour both in terms of accommodation, and in terms of work. You owned a small flower shop at the ground floor of your townhouse, he owned a record store placed strategically wall-to-wall with yours — naturally he lived above it. Marcel, Porco's brother, was seemingly a nicer person, but he wasn't always there when you needed him to shut his little brother's mouth — or music. Not only were you two bickering like petty children, you were also complete opposites — he was edgy and brash, you were dainty and solemn. He always wore dark colours, you were dressed in pastels. And to make matters worse, he was best friends with your best friend!

Pieck was completely oblivious to the fact that you two hated each other, both bitching to her, unaware of the other's complaints. She always told you, separately, that perhaps you just need to get laid with one another and get over it. Impossible, for you despised each other. And when Pieck invited you to a small party at her place, you were not expecting to see Porco there. At first, you wanted to turn around and leave, but your friend talked you into staying, promising that Porco was actually a good guy, and that you didn't know him well enough. Oh, how wrong she was. He was evil incarnate, he vandalised your shop after you called the cops on him. Nonetheless, you stayed at her party, opting to spend some time with Reiner and Colt, avoiding Porco at all costs, because if looks could kill, his would smite you.

What you didn't know was that a conflict was taking place inside his tipsy brain — should he kill you or fuck you? Despite your differences, Porco couldn't deny that you were a very alluring woman, hips swaying every time you walked and an ass that could raise the dead. And he saw Colt glancing at that ass, prompting him to drink some more. On the other side of the room, you told Pieck all about how your date stood you up and you were quite sad, opting to drown the empty feeling in your chest with cheap vodka and tequila, and that combination did a number on you. You weren't shitfaced by any means, just drunk enough to feel the music better, taste the liquor better, smell Porco's perfume better whenever he walked past you. God, he intoxicated you more than the alcohol could, and you were beginning to wonder if Pieck was right — maybe you didn't hate him, maybe you needed to fuck him, relieve the sexual tension. But how? What if he did hate you and you'd only make a fool of yourself? The questions were grinding your gears and no amount of tequila could help you get them out of your system. You settled on ignoring them.

"We're gonna split a cab." Porco explained, a bored, inexpensive look on his face.

"Hey, 'm not poor, aight? I can afford a f-fuckin' taxi." You poked his chest with your index finger while losing your balance and falling into his arms. He quickly released you once you regained control of your legs, his eyes drifting elsewhere, crimson creeping to his cheeks.

"We literally live next to each other, but if you wanna go all by yourself, fine!"

"I haaaaate you, Pokko, d'you know? I especially hate that cute nose! Boop!"

He was so done with your attitude, your gestures, your voice, his brows furrowed and lips pursed. But Pieck really wanted to make sure you got home safe, and Porco didn't want to disappoint his friend by letting you loose in a stranger's car, especially since you were drunk and vulnerable. He was an asshole, but he wasn't that bad. Not that you could realise that, anyway.

"Just get in the car, Y/N." He rolled his eyes and opened the door once the yellow taxi pulled over. You stopped between him and the car, nose and cheeks pink from the alcohol, and leaned closer to his face.

"D'you also know I really, really wanna ride you?" You whispered in his ear before stumbling inside the cab, giggling like a schoolgirl. "Ah! Evening, mister!"

"Jesus Christ..."

The entire way home you drove Porco insane with little touches, whispers, obscene proposals. He could feel his cock twitching in his pants but he didn't want to take advantage of you. Yet the more you looked at him with hunger in your eyes, the more he couldn't think rationally — he, too, was drunk, after all. When you got out of the car you almost fell face first, but luckily, he caught you, your hand accidentally brushing his thigh in the process. God, he hated you.

"Come inside!" You looped an arm around his neck for better balance. "I gotta give you your money b-back."

"It's fine."

"No, no, I insist."

"You're so annoying, you know that?" Porco walked with you, perfectly aware of how much he'd regret this night.

"Close the door behind youuuu!" You kicked your shoes off and grabbed the collar of his leather jacket, practically dragging him through the hallway, into the living room. "Sit!"

He could say no. He could just walk out. But he didn't want to. Not anymore.

You rummaged through a drawer looking for some cash, taking your sweet time to do it. The way you were bent over, the tight skirt revealing just an inch of your red panties, sent Porco down a rabbit hole of dirty thoughts. Every gesture, every word uttered so nonchalantly by you made you both forget the turf war you both started, the atmosphere slowly becoming more intimate and sensual. You swayed your hips from side to side, opening another drawer and digging through the clutter.

"Hey, Pokko? Do you think 'm pretty?"

The question caught him off guard as you turned around, no money in your hands. He raised his gaze from your skirt to your eyes, frantically nodding his head.

"Yeah."

"Then why did I get stood up?" You pouted, walking to the couch. Porco swallowed hard when you took a seat on his thigh, his fingers digging into the sofa. "If 'm pretty, why don't men want me?" Your hands rested on his shoulders as your hips slowly rocked back and forth.

"I- I don't know." He pursed his lips, unaware of what to do. Usually, he wouldn't have any issues with situations like this. But it was different this time because he really wanted to shut your srupid mouth up — or maybe Pieck was right and all he needed to do was fuck you.

"Do you want me?" You asked, head tilted, movement stopping.

"God, yes." Porco grabbed your nape and pulled you into a sloppy kiss, his other hand desperately tugging at your tank top strap. You could feel your panties dampening under his rough touch and hot kiss, your hands removing his jacket as quickly as possible. "I'm gonna fuck you on that table first." He picked you up and slammed your ass on the dining table, earning a moan out of you. "Then we'll take it to the bedroom." Porco removed his shirt while you pulled your underwear down.

"Fuck me wherever you want, just fuck me!" You begged, legs spread and lust in your eyes.

"Shit, I knew you were a little slut under all that soft girl crap." He unzipped his jeans, letting them fall to the ground while he pulled his cock out. You took a good look at it, teeth digging into your lower lip.

"Aren't you gonna finger me first?"

"You didn't do anything to deserve it. But I'm in a good mood." Porco sneered before he spat on your wet cunt. The disgusting gesture made you purr like a kitten, proving him more that you were indeed a filthy whore. He dragged the tip of his cock up and down your slit, slowly pushing it between your folds as you threw your head back in pleasure. "Fuuuck, you're so tight, so wet."

"Oh my God, go deeper! Please!" You pleaded, voice low and seductive.

"Look how good you're taking it." Porco praised you, fingers digging into your skin before he started rocking his hips. It truly felt that your pussy was made just for him, the silken walls clenching around his hard cock making him grunt with every thrust. Your legs wrapped around his waist and you both realised just how much you needed this, the hate you had for each other melting away, replaced by lust and desire.

"So b-big 'nd hard-" You mumbled incoherent words while one hand found your neck, calloused fingertips squeezing the skin.

"You've no idea how much I wanted these hands around your neck." Porco groaned, his thrusts faster and harder. "Who knew I wanted to fuck you, not kill you?" His thumb parted your lips and you hollowed your cheeks around it, sucking on it like a lollipop. "Good girl. Bedroom, now." He pulled out and you almost cried at the empty feeling between your thighs. You took his hand in yours and guided him to the room — just as pastel and cute as your personality. Porco spun you around, giving your ass a firm slap before bending you down. He pressed hot kisses on your hip and lower back and you threw your head back to look at him.

"Stop t-teasing me!"

"Jeez, aren't you greedy? I thought you hated me." He laughed into your skin, the vibrations tickling your flesh. Porco couldn't abstain any longer, one hand grasping your hip, the other pushing his cock back into you. Inch by inch, it disappeared and he let out a satisfied groan.

"I still h-hate you!" Teeth sunk into your lip to stifle a moan.

"Oh, really?" He thrusted so deep that you lost control over your arms, head falling onto the mattress. Another deep thrust and you shot back up with a growl. "Talk shit and I might not let you finish." His threat alerted you and you bucked your hips, walls clenching around his cock.

"It would be a shame if you f-finished first." Your voice was cocky, targeting that huge ego of his. It was effective — Porco's hand travelled between your legs, fingers rubbing your swollen clit and you moaned in extasy, adrenaline rushing through your veins.

"N-not fair!" You squirmed and whimpered, tears of pleasure pooling at your eyes.

"We're not playing fair." He wrapped his other hand around your neck to pull you closer, back hitting his chest. The room smelled of sex and jasmine incense and it drove you mad with lust. "Oh, what's the matter? Are you coming already?" He mocked while fucking your desperate cunt.

"Yes! God, yes!" You cried out, the climax blurring your vision.

Despite your pleas that you couldn't take it anymore, Porco kept thrusting deeper into your numbing pussy, his fingers bruising your skin, his teeth sinking into your shoulder. He was an animal, everything about him was instinctual and filthy and you hatedloved it. Your silken walls clenched around his cock again, and he was impressed that you still had some fight left in you.

"That's right, milk me dry, you dirty whore." His disgusting words reignited the dying fire inside your core and you bucked your hips against his, the friction and pressure making you come undone a second time.

"Fuck!" Was all you could say before collapsing onto the mattress, body limp and exhausted.

"Damn it, Y/N. I said milk me dry." Porco grabbed a fistful of hair and turned you over, yanking your head back to shove his cock down your throat. How on earth did he have so much stamina? You hollowed your cheeks and triedto suck, but it was him actually fucking your pretty mouth. "Are you gonna keep being a little bitch?"

"Nu-uh!" You shook your head, the word muffled by his girth. Your cheeks were burning from the lack of air, your eyes watery and red.

"Good." He groaned, thick, hot strings of his seed shooting down your throat. "Swallow." Porco held your head back as he slowly pulled out, the bitter taste lingering on your tongue.

You laid on the bed and pulled him next to you, unaware of what to do or say. Your body relaxed when he looped an arm around your shoulders, your head resting on his chest.

"Do you still hate me?" He asked.

"It depends. Are you gonna blast music at three in the morning?"

"Yep."

"Well, there's your answer." You laughed and planted a kiss on his cheek.

"Listen, I'm not sorry you got stood up tonight. I mean, I am, but I'm not-"

"Porco, stop talking. It was never going to work out with him, anyway."

"Fair enough." He shrugged, lips pursed and eyes narrowed. "What if I take you out?"

"Like a date, or a murder?"

"It depends. Are you gonna call the cops on me again?"

"I'll try not to?"

"A date, then."

[jumukus]

A3! Event: WONDER RUSH Episode 10 Translation

Showtime! A heads up on the characters:

Yuki as Koro Muku as Maru Tenma as Rio Kumon as Chacha Misumi as Ray Kazunari as Ruy

Rento: Pleased to be working with you today.

Izumi: Same here.

Misumi: I'll be in your care, woof~!

Kumon: I'll be in your care, woof woof!

Rento: Looks like I've found more cute puppies~.

Because I've got a great audio source with me, I'm gonna make sure their barking will perfectly match your roles!

Yuki: Oh, you're referring to that, right?

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Yuki: Hey. Can you use this sound for the play?

Rento: Sound?

Koro: "Woof woof woof!"

Rento: Heh. Nice one.

Yuki: Is it possible?

Rento: Why not? It's a real doggie sound, after all. But you're gonna lose if you don't do your best in that part, y'kno!

Yuki: Do you know who you're talking to now?

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Rento: In any case, leave the sound effects to me.

Izumi: (He's gotten used to the job so I find it easier to cooperate with him now. He's a reliable fellow.)

Kazunari: Alrighty! Let's form a circle now!

Yuki: Are we really doing that?

Kazunari: We're dogges after all!

Yuki: Fine. Just like the Summer Troupe--Summer Troupe, let's go doggos!

Misumi: Let's go doggos!

Kumon: Let's go doggos!

Muku: L-Let's go doggos!

Tenma: Let's go doggos…

Koro: "Rick! Going on a stroll is so much fun, right!"

Rick: "Koro, to tell you the truth, I'm going to get married soon."

"My partner also owns a dog, you see. Since we're going to live together, you have to get along with her dog, alright? Oh, look. They're here."

Sharon: "Hello, Koro-kun. Nice to meet you."

Maru: "Hello, I'm Maru! Nice to meet you! Let's be friends!"

Koro: "Whoa?!"

Sharon: "Hey, Maru! Don't get too excited! You're just going to bother Koro-kun that way!"

Rick: "Hahaha. Koro is quite timid."

Koro: "The heck is wrong with you?! Keep your distance!"

Maru: "This much is nothing, right! We're going to be brothers, anyway!"

Koro: "Get away from me! Do you think I want to get along with you? Hell no!"

Maru: "Don't be like that. Let's play together!"

"Should we play-fight? Or chase? I'm fine with hole digging too!"

Koro: "What's hole digging?"

Maru: "Basically, we're digging a hole with all our might!"

Koro: "No way I'm doing that! Why did Rick decide to get married, anyway!"

Rig: "It's okay, Koro. You'll get used to it."

Koro: "No! I don't want to live with other people!"

Izumi: (Both of them are so full of energy. They do seem like cute puppies!)

Rick: "Are you alright, Koro? Did you get tired from playing with Maru?"

Koro: "...What play? He just chased me around. If I live with someone like that, I'm only going to get sick from stress."

Rick: "Hm? Weird… I'm sure I put my engagement ring here. Where is it?"

Koro: "What's wrong?"

Rick: "No way. Did I drop it? Oh no… It's such an important thing and yet…"

Koro: "Engagement ring…? Is it really that important?"

Rick: "Koro, are you trying to cheer me up? Thank you."

"But this is bad… What should I do? Let's call Sharon for now."

Koro: "Cheer up. I'm going to go look for it."

Rick: "Hey, Sharon…? Yeah…"

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Koro: "I can't smell anything more from here…"

Maru: "Sniffs, sniffs. Is it around here~?"

Koro: "Oh! You're…"

Maru: "Oh! Koro! What are you doing here?"

Koro: "It's none of your business."

Maru: "Do you happen to see a wing around here? It's an important wing. I think it's dropped around here."

Koro: "Wing? There's no way I saw such a thing here."

Maru: "Oh no… Apparently, that wing is important to both Sharon and Rick."

Koro: "Do you mean, engagement ring?"

Maru: "That's right! Engagement wing! Are you looking for that too? Let's search for it together!"

Koro: "...Listen, we're only together to find the ring. Don't you dare act more familiar than--."

Maru: "Whoa… Thank God! I get a little bit anxious doing it alone! It's a relief to have you here!"

"I have a feeling we can find the ring if we do it together! Huh, what did you just say, Koro?"

Koro: "Shut up! Stop talking and start searching already!"

Muku: "Okay!"

Rio: "Hey, Koro, what are you doing here alone?"

Chacha: "Going on a stroll? Is that kid your friend?"

Maru: "Hello! I'm Maru! Kuro and I will be brothers soon!"

Rio: "Brothers?"

Koro: "We're not! Enough of that. Rio, Chacha, you often go on a walk in this course, right? Do you happen to find a ring around here?"

Rio: "A ring?"

Female: "KYAA! A THIEF!!!"

Maru: "Huh? Huh? What's happening?"

Gangster: "Move!"

Chacha: "Arf!"

Rio: "Chacha! You okay?!"

Koro: "That smell just now… Hey, I'm gonna chase after that guy!"

Maru: "What? Hey, wait for me~!"

Rio: "I'm going with you! Wait here, Chacha!"

Chacha: "Yip…"

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Koro: "Woof woof woof!"

Gangster: "What the heck is this dog's problem?!"

Rio: "What did you do to Chacha, you thief?!"

Maru: "I don't really know what's going on, but you can't do bad things!"

Koro: "You have the ring, don't you?! Show it!"

Rio: "You stole that bag, didn't you?! Give it back! Bark bark!"

Gangster: "Tch."

*starts engine*

Koro: "Hey, wait!"

Maru: "Koro, he's riding a bike. You can't catch up to him."

Koro: "Damn… I can smell the ring's scent from him!"

Female: "Oh! My bag! Did you guys take it back for me?"

Rio: "It's my job to protect the townspeople!"

Female: "Thank you."

Maru: "Are you a police officer, Rio?"

Koro: "His owner is one."

Chacha: "Rio~ Are you okay~?"

Rio: "The thief escaped, but we managed to take back the stolen bag."

"How about you, Chacha? How are you feeling now?"

Chacha: "I'm fine! I just tripped a little bit, after all."

Maru: "That's great."

Koro: "We were so close…"

Rio: "Hey, Koro, what do you mean by, 'That guy has the ring,'?"

Koro: "Rick's engagement ring is stolen."

"Rick told me he dropped it somewhere, but I have no doubt that guy stole it. The smell can't lie!"

Rio: "I see, so he committed another crime. We should chase after him, then."

Maru: "Are you going to help us?!"

Chacha: "Of course! It's our job to protect the townspeople!"

Rio: "Yeah. Okay, enough chit chat. We should go and gather info right away--."

Jack: "Hey! Rio! Chacha! I've told you not to exit the park!"

Chacha: "Yip…"

Rio: "No, wait, Jack, we're just protecting pe--."

Jack: "C'mon, we're going home now."

Chacha: "Huh~What~."

Rio: "My bad! We have to investigate it ourselves now! I'll leave the search to you guys!"

Maru: "I'm counting on you~!"

Koro: "...This is bad. We can't pursue him anymore the farther we are from the ring."

Maru: "Oh! I remember that guy's smell! Over here!"

Koro: "Heh, you're surprisingly useful."

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Izumi: (Their interaction is very Summer Troupe-like, and the characters are really cute. Not only Muku-kun and Yuki-kun, but the others are also in sync.)

Rento: (The dogs' barking sound fits perfectly!)

Maru: "He should be around here…"

Koro: "Huh? That's his bike!"

Maru: "You remember that?!"

Koro: "It hasn't been that long since we saw it, duh."

Maru: "Everything that humans ride looks the same to me."

Koro: "I'll take back my words…"

Maru: "'Take back my forks?'"

Koro: "Forget it. Anyway, that's him. He entered that building."

Maru: "Koro, wait for me!"

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Gangster: "This is today's lot."

Mafia: "Is this all you got?"

Gangster: "My apologies. I ran into some troubles."

Maru: "That ring!"

Koro: "Hold on! He's not alone."

Maru: "But the ring is right in front of us."

Koro: "Let's wait until the others are gone."

Maru: "I see!"

Koro: "Sssh! You're being noisy."

Guard Dog: "Grrrr… Who are y'all?"

Maru: "Whoa?!"

Guard Dog: "Woof woof woof!"

Mafia: "What is it?"

Koro: "I don't know they have a guard dog! Let's run away!"

Gangster: "Looks like some stray dogs accidentally got here."

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Guard Dog: "Stop right there! You broke into our territory! I'm going to tear you limb from limb!"

Maru: "Eeeek!"

Koro: "Quick!"

Ray: "Hey. Over here."

Koro: "?!"

Ruy: "Don't ask anything and just hide here."

Guard Dog: "Tch. I lost sight of them. Don't fool around with me."

Maru: "That was so scary~!!"

Ruy: "Are you alright?"

Ray: "What did you do to make him chase after you like that?"

Koro: "You are…?"

Ruy: "My name is Ruy."

Ray: "I'm Ray. We're pretty much the mascots of this bar."

Koro: "I'm Koro, and this one is Maru. Our owners' engagement ring is stolen, you see."

Ray: "Oh. His owner is a mafia, you know."

Maru: "We want to take back the ring!"

Ray: "Hey, dude, have you seen his fangs? He can eat you up in a single bite!"

Koro: "Do you have any idea how we can sneak in without being noticed by him?"

Ray: "Are you serious now?"

Koro: "It's an important ring, after all."

Ruy: "Let's help them out, Ruy."

Ray: "Sighs, You've got a lot of guts. Goodness."

Maru: "Will you help us?!"

Ruy: "I'll tell you where their back door is. Once you open it, make sure to get in without him noticing. Be extra careful."

Koro: "Got it. Thanks."

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Mafia: "Don't mess up our plan."

Gangster: "Understood."

Mafia: "Put your catch today in the safe. Together with tomorrow's loot, we're gonna hand them all to the agent and sell them."

Koro: "This is bad. We can't get the ring back if it gets sold."

Maru: "That means we have to take it now while we can!"

Guard Dog: "...Hm? It stinks for some reason. Is it coming from there?"

Koro: "Uh oh… Let's escape now."

Maru: "But the ring…"

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Koro: "The ring will be handed to the agent tomorrow, so now we've gotta think of a plan to take it back."

Maru: "I see! So that's how it is! As expected of Koro! I never thought about such a thing at all! I feel relieved to leave this to Koro!"

Koro: "You're too simple."

Maru: "You're really awesome, Koro. I'm sure we can get the ring back!"

Koro: "Let's go back home for now and meet up tomorrow morning…"

Maru: "Oh! It's Sharon! Heeey!! I'm here!"

Koro: "There's Rick too! I guess they're on a date, huh. Perfect timing. Let's go home together!"

Maru: "Hmm? They didn't notice us."

Koro: "...They're in their own world. Rick is no longer…"

Maru: "See you tomorrow, Koro… Huh? Koro?"

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Koro: "Sharon is Rick's No. 1 now. He doesn't care about me anymore."

"I've always been Rick's best friend, but now… I don't care what happened to the ring now."

"Oh. If the ring is gone, maybe they will cancel their wedding. In that case…"

*door opens*

Rick: "Koro, I'm home. Sorry, I'm late."

"What's wrong, Koro? Are you sick or something? You seem down."

"Eat this. I'm going to play a lot with you on the weekend. Good night."

Koro: "..."

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Maru: "Morning, Koro! Let's take the ring back!"

Koro: "Not going."

Maru: "What?"

Koro: "They may cancel the wedding if the ring's gone, after all."

"If that happens, you can continue living alone with Sharon. That's better for both of us, right?"

Maru: "Did you really mean that? I can't let Sharon be sad! Come on, let's take the ring back!"

Koro: "I don't care about the ring."

Maru: "...I don't get you, Koro! Fine. I'll take it back alone!"

Koro: "..."

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Rick: "Do you want to live with me?"

"Alright. I'll name you Koro, then! Nice to meet you, Koro!"

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Rick: "Koro, are you okay?! I'll take you to the hospital! You'll be fine! Don't worry!"

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Koro: "There's no way he can take it back alone."

"He won't go to a mafia's hideout by himself, right…"

"But given his simple, one-track minded way of thinking, that's possible."

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Maru: "You're really awesome, Koro. I'm sure we can get the ring back!"

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Koro: "...Aaaah! Geez!"

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Maru: "Yeep!"

Guard Dog: "Grrr… so you tried to sneak in again, you cheeky bastard! I'm going to make you regret doing it so you won't come here ever again!"

Maru: "Eeeeek! I-I'm not afraid of you! I know Koro will be here soon!"

Guard Dog: "Heh?"

Maru: "He-He'll… He'll be here… Right?"

"Aaargh, Koro! Help me!"

Guard Dog: "What's that? The trash can?"

Koro: "Maru! Over here!"

Maru: "Koro!"

Koro: "Let's run away now!"

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Koro: "Huff… Huff… I think we're fine now."

Maru: "Whoaaaaa!! That was so scary!!"

Koro: "That's because you dared to go alone."

Maru: "But I know you'd come!"

Koro: "But why…"

Maru: "Because you're a good guy, Koro! I know you'll take the ring back for Rick's sake!"

Koro: "What are you going to do if I don't come? You'd die."

Maru: "Hehe. I didn't think of that."

Koro: "Goodness…"

Chacha: "Heeey! Koro! Maru!"

Rio: "We know who the ring thief is!"

"We heard he's an underling of a mafia who keeps robbing luxury jewelry stores."

Maru: "By mafia, you mean…"

Koro: "The guy in that hideout, for sure."

Rio: "You've gone to their hideout?! Excellent!"

Koro: "I heard them talk about a plan yesterday. I figured they're going to rob another jewelry store today…"

Rio: "It must be Chiffany, then."

"That's the only store around here that they haven't gone to."

Maru: "When I went to their hideout just now, their guard dog was the only one there. I couldn't find the box with the ring inside nor the car. Don't tell me…"

Chacha: "We've gotta let Jack know about this now!"

Maru: "Jack?"

Rio: "Our owner!"

Chacha: "Bad news, Jack! The mafia will rob Chiffany today!"

Rio: "Let's head to Chiffany and stop the mafia now!"

Jack: "What is it? Did you make new friends? Great for you."

Chacha: "That's not it! I told you it's bad news!"

Jack: "Your leash will get entangled if you keep spinning around like that. Hold on. I'll release it…"

Maru: "This is bad. He doesn't get it at all!"

Koro: "Let's just go by ourselves!"

Rio: "I'm going with you!"

Chacha: "Oh! Me too!"

Jack: "Hey! Rio! Chacha! Stop right there!"

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Maru: "Where is Chiffany again?"

Chacha: "I know where it is! There's one before the animal hospital!"

Koro: "Let's be quick!"

Guard Dog: "Grrr… I finally found you. How dare you put me in so much trouble."

Maru: "Eeek!"

Koro: "To think you chase us all the way here… So persistent."

Rio: "Who's he?"

Maru: "The mafia's guard dog."

Chacha: "That means he's a bad guy!"

Guard Dog: "The heck is wrong with y'all? So troublesome. I'll just beat y'all up right here right now!"

Rio: "Koro, Maru, just leave us here. We'll deal with this guy."

Chacha: "Hey, hey Mr. Satan! We're here! Can you catch us~?"

Guard Dog: "Stop looking down on me! Just you wait…"

Koro: "Rio, Chacha! Be careful!"

Maru: "Thank you!"

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Rio: "Huff… Huff…"

Chacha: "Oh no! We hit a deadend!"

Guard Dog: "You think I'm a fool, hah?! I'm gonna eat you up!"

Ray: "Is this some kind of a new trend or what? Testing your courage with a guard dog."

Ruy: "Everyone sure is brave~."

Guard Dog: "Do you want to interrupt me or what?!"

Ray: "We can't let the back of our store get dirty."

Ruy: "Come on! Hide here."

Guard Dog: "Hey, wait!"

Rio: "Thanks for helping us."

Ray: "I'm sure he'll give up if you stay here for a while."

Chacha: "But we have to help Koro and Maru!"

Ruy: "Koro and Maru? What's with them?"

Rio: "Do you know them? They're going to a mafia place to take back a ring."

Ray: "So they still haven't given up on that?"

"Oh, well. I guess we have no choice, then. We're past the point of no return at this rate. Let us join you."

Rio: "Thank you!"

Izumi: (Misumi-kun and Kazunari-kun's brothers pair has such a strong presence.)

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Koro: "Looks like the mafia isn't here yet."

Maru: "Is this really the right store?"

Koro: "Should we head in for now? I think no one will notice now."

Maru: "I don't see anything strange now. Is the mafia going to…"

Female Customer: "Kyaaa!"

Male Customer: "What's that?!"

Maru: "They're here!"

Koro: "Let's hide below the car! Once they get out of the car, we'll get in and take back the ring!"

Mafia: "Don't move! And you, put all the jewelry in this bag!"

Store Clerk: "Ye-Yes."

Mafia: "I'll shoot if you try to do anything funny!"

Koro: "Now. I'm sure the box with the ring must be inside…"

Maru: "Found it!"

Koro: "How about the ring?"

Maru: "It's here!"

Koro: "Nice. Now, all we need to do is to leave quietly…"

Female Customer: "Why is this happening…?"

Male Customer: "We'll be fine. We'll be fine."

Gangster: "Stop talking!"

Female Customer: "Eep."

Koro: "Those two…"

Maru: "What's wrong?"

Koro: "I bet they're here to buy engagement rings."

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Rick:  "Koro, to tell you the truth, I'm going to get married soon."

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Koro: "--."

Maru: "Koro?! Where are you going?!"

Koro: "Bring the ring to Sharon, Maru!"

Maru: "Koro!!"

Koro: "Woof woof woof!"

Gangster: "What's with this dog?!"

Mafia: "Kick him out now!"

Gangster: "You're in the way! Move!"

Koro: "...nngh."

Maru: "Koro?!"

Koro: "Maru?! I've told you to run away…"

Gangster: "Whoa?! Why is the car?!"

Mafia: "This is bad! Hey, go take a look at the car!"

Gangster: "I can't believe there's also a dog here!"

Maru: "Yeep."

Koro: "Oh no. If this goes on…"

Chacha: "Koro! Maru! Are you okay?!"

Rio: "Enough, Mafia! Stay where you are!"

Ray: "Backup is here!"

Ruy: "We're going to catch you in style~!"

Maru: "Even Ruy and Ray?!"

Gangster: "Whoa?! Stop it!"

Store Clerk: "O-Okay, I'm going to call the police while I can now…"

Chacha: "We won't forgive bad guys!"

Rio: "It's our job to protect the townspeople!"

Ray: "Woof!"

Gangster: "Ouch ouch ouch! Don't bite me!"

Mafia: "Shit! Get away from me!"

*police sirene*

Gangster: "Po-Police…?!"

Mafia: "Tch. Let's run away!"

Jack: "Police! Stay where you are!"

Mafia: "Shit! How could we get caught here…"

Gangster: "Why did dogs mess up our plan…"

Jack: "Nice job, Rio, Chacha. But you're not allowed to run away like that again."

Chacha: "Ehehe!"

Rio: "But it's our job to protect the townspeople, Jack."

Jack: "Your friends are really brave. We're going to give them awards."

Maru: "Yeaaay! Isn't that awesome, Koro?!"

Koro: "I don't really care about that, though."

Ray: "Guess we should go home now."

Ruy: "It's time to open the store~."

Koro: "Ray. Ruy. Thanks for helping us."

Ray: "No problem. It was pretty fun."

Ruy: "Come visit our bar again!"

Koro: "We should give back this ring."

Maru: "Yep!"

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

Koro: "Huft… So tired. I'm going to put the ring on the table and tell Rick later…"

Maru: "I'm sure Sharon will be happy… zzz…"

Koro: "Hey! Sleep at your own home!"

Maru: "Zzzz…"

Koro: "Oh, well…. I'll let you sleep next to me."

"He helped me take back the ring, after all."

Maru: "Zzz."

Koro: "Move! You're getting too carried away!"

Maru: "Hehehe, we're brothers...zzz."

Koro: "Oh God… Guess I'll be having a hard time with this clumsy brother...zzz…"

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

Rick: "I'm home. Koro, Sharon is here… Huh?"

Sharon: "Why is Maru sleeping here?!"

Rick: "Sharon! Look! The ring…"

᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃

Yuki: Thanks for watching, woof!

Muku: Thank you very much, woof!

Misumi: Woof woof!

Kazunari: Woofie!

Tenma: Thank you very much! Woof!

Kumon: Hahaha! Tenma-san, you're desperate~!

< Episode 9 | Masterlist | Epilogue >

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Fifty

Table of Content or Part Forty-Nine

Wattpad

Word count: 4.9K

Warning(s): Explicit language, Violence, drug abuse

A/N: so this is annoying, I know, but as I was writing this chapter, I may or may not have made a plot hole that I went back in the story and filled in so it wouldn't contradict with this chapter, I think most of you will know what it is, I'd tell you now but I don't wanna spoil the chapter. Anyway, sorry if that bugs you guys but I was writing and it just flowed out but I did go back so the chapter it was first brought up in matches what happens in this one so it's not confusing for future readers.

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"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday, dear Nikki, happy birthday to you!" We sing as Nikki's about to blow the candles out of his cake.

"Wait, wait, wait!" Steven interjects, holding a joint above one of the lit candles, lighting the end of it on fire. "Okay."

He takes a drag of his blunt as Nikki blows his candles out, Tommy patting his shoulders.

"A whole twenty-eight years and you're still kickin', man." Tommy tells him and he grins.

"Who'da thought." Nikki adds, laughing, taking a sip of his homemade margarita.

"Okay, who wants cake?" I ask them, getting up from Tansy's dining room table to go get a knife from the kitchen.

I come back in to see Nikki and Tommy cutting at random parts of the cake with their switch blades.

"Guys, c'mon." Sharise scolds them, lightly hitting their arms before plucking the cake and icing covered blades from their hands.

"Boo, mom." Nikki sarcastically lets out with Tommy and Steven both echoing in "boo!"

"Hey, you're the good child." Sharise snaps her fingers at Stevie. "Don't let Chip and Dale contaminate you." She states to him, motioning to Nikki and Tommy, brushing past me to go to the kitchen to clean their switch blades off.

I give pieces of cake out, which isn't that much work since there's only seven of us in total: Nikki, me, Vince, Sharise, Tommy, Steven and Tansy, and once we're done eating, Tansy's insisting on presents.

"Alright, time for presents in the living room." She claps her hands together and we all head there, Nikki falling back on a couch and pulling me onto his lap.

"I'm gonna let you open 'em, babe." He tells me, patting at my hips where I shift to rest on one of his spread knees.

"Nikki, opening them is the best part." I argue.

"Which is exactly why I'm letting you do it." He replies, smiling tightly, but I know it's really because he doesn't feel like doing it.

I just roll my eyes playfully and Tansy organizes the presents around us.

"Okay, great and mighty one, which present would you like to be opened first?" I ask him and he leans over a little to see past me to examine the various shapes and sizes of his gifts.

"I want...that one." He points in the direction of a small, rectangle shaped box wrapped in news paper and Tansy hands it to me.

"This one's from me and Stevie." She adds.

"Thanks." I tell them, taking it from her and I dig into the paper and unravel it, seeing a black guitar pick, with a tiny name etched into it with white ink, I have to squint to make it out, but when I see who it's from, I know Nikki will love it.

I hand it to him, and he struggles to get his eyes to focus before looking at Tansy.

"Marc Bolan?" He asks her, impressed. "I didn't even think you knew who Marc Bolan was." He says to Tansy.

"I didn't until he died and Vince went into a depression over it for a few months." She explains. "But Stevie and I were thinking of what to get you, and then Doc helped me get in contact with his wife earlier this year and she still has his things and sent us that for you." She explains.

"Aww, that's cool." Sharise pipes.

"Guys, you didn't have to do that." I state.

"Aw, man, thanks, guys, I really like it." Nikki tells the two blondes, keeping himself from tearing up as he plays it off by clearing his throat, handing the pick to Tommy and Vince so they can look at it.

"You're welcome, dude." Steven replies.

"Alright, next is from..." Tansy looks at the name tag attached to a box wrapped in black paper. "...Tommy and Heather."

"It's kinda for you and Vivian." Tommy tells us. "We were gonna wait for Christmas but I figured it'd be better for your birthday."

"Is it raunchy?" I ask him to make sure.

"No." He assures me, smiling excitedly as I start unwrapping it.

I get it unwrapped and open the box to see a thickly packed book, and open it up to see an old picture of Nikki and I, visibly scowling at each other, looking like we're in the middle of an argument. He's in one of their old stage outfits they played the clubs in, in their early days and his black hair is completely covering his eyes, while I'm not wearing a trace of makeup, my hair pulled into a ponytail and my middle finger in his face.

Under the picture reads "The Whisky, '81."

I start flipping through it, seeing more candids and pictures of the two of us, featuring the guys, Tansy, their girlfriends at the time, groupies, Ozzy and his band, us with Sharon, the guys of Ratt, fans, us standing in front of important landmarks in other countries and different states we've visited in the U.S., our wedding photos, our reception pictures, "Shout at the Devil" era, "Theater of Pain" era...practically an entire montage of some of our biggest highlights and smaller, more intimate moments in between, featuring all of our friends and people we look up to and admire, all up to this year because there's even pictures of us hanging out with them recently.

Every picture is marked with a place, month and year and I sniffle back tears.

"You were so cute." Nikki comments as I pass the album to him and he's looking at one of the first pages at a picture of me and Tansy from one of their earlier shows. "You look like a baby." He adds, chuckling, patting at my thigh and I look at Tommy, more tears spilling over my lashes.

"Viv." He starts, smiling goofily at me.

"Aww, don't cry or I'll cry." Steven states.

"I'm sorry." I laugh a little, Sharise handing me a tissue from the box on Tansy's side table beside the couch before I'm getting up to see Tommy.

He's sitting on the edge of a comfy chair, and welcomes me with open arms when I sit across his long, skinny legs, and hug him as tightly as I possibly can.

Tansy leans over to look at the pictures with Nikki and she smiles.

"This was the night you lost your virginity, Viv!" Tansy pipes, holding the album up to show me a picture of me with my hand on ice--because Nikki slammed my fingers in my car door on accident--looking like I want to strangle Nikki and Vince as they try to wrap my hand up like a bandage, using a sock, which didn't work out anyway.

"You lost your virginity with one hand?" Steven asks me and Nikki and I exchange looks.

"It was her first time so it's not like she was doing much work, anyway." Tansy states.

"Okay, we can change the subject." I reply, awkwardly.

"She was doing plenty without needing her hands." Nikki insinuates reminiscently. "That's when I learned her little prude act is a cover up."

"Babe." I complain as Tommy squeezes his eyes shut, not wanting to imagine me and Nikki having sex.

"Fine." Nikki chuckles, nudging at Tansy to get him another present.

Once he's done unwrapping the rest of them, Sharise and I are picking up the wrapping paper and throwing it in the garbage can, and cleaning the place up while the guys talk in the living room.

By the time we're finished, we're heading back to the living room and I'm sitting down next to Nikki, laying my head on his thigh because I'm sleepy.

His fingers brush against the red strands of my hair soothingly, and I maintain on the brink of sleep, but still able to hear everyone's conversation and sudden bouts of loud laughter.

I'm nudged awake as Vince, Tommy and Steven talk about taking Nikki out to a few bars here in Malibu for his birthday.

Nikki stands up and I just put my head back down on the couch when he gets up before he's chuckling to himself.

"Let me get her to bed and I'll be out there." He tells them. "Viv, baby, c'mon, let's go to bed." He says to me and I stretch, humming softly as I wake up, sort of.

When he sees I'm not getting up, he leans down, and picks me up bridal style as Tansy points him in the direction of guest bedrooms.

My back hits the soft mattress and I feel him pulling at my jeans to get them off and I find the motivation to try to fumble to get my constricting bra off.

He sees me struggle to unbuckle it in my hazy state and scoffs a little, helping me get it undone before I'm throwing it in the floor.

He's pulling the covers back so I can curl up underneath them.

"I'll be back later, k?" He asks and I nod with my eyes still closed, getting comfortable on the bed.

"I'm sorry I'm so tired, I'll give you the best blow job ever later on." I promise him, knowing he probably expected a fun night for the both of us for his birthday. "And can you ask Sharise or Tansy if they can sleep in here with me until you get back?"

"Okay, Viv." I hear his smile in his words before his lips are pressing to my forehead for a second. "Goodnight, baby."

"G'night." I mumble.

He steps to the door and switches the light off before stepping out.

He hadn't been that affectionate since we got married.

I blamed it on the fact it on the fact that he'd "sobered" up to focus on the album and kicked heroin.

He'd gotten back on freebase, yeah, but cocaine, in any form, never made him mean or vindictive.

He would hallucinate and get scared, but he wasn't consciously mean for no reason.

Heroin, however, turned him into the devil, and by that point in his addiction he functioned better on heroin, than not, because without it in his system he just couldn't think of anything else other than getting a fix and if you weren't apart of his aid for a fix, you weren't worth his time and he let you know.

So I thought he had kicked his heroin habit for the most part because he was being nicer than usual to me but oh, no.

He felt guilty for cheating on me so he compensated by not being an asshole to me as much--yet.

It makes sense to me, now. I'd feel like shit, too, if I were telling my mistress I was going to leave my wife for her because my wife was "suffocating" and "draining the life" out of me.

Which translates to, "I'm leaving my wife because she doesn't like or contribute to my addiction."

Christmas came and Jason was Nikki's Santa Claus.

Then came New Years...which winded up being near death experience number one of two involving my safety at the hands of Sikki.

Sharise, Skylar and I pull into the driveway in Sharise's car, and she's putting it in park as I grab my few shopping bags.

"Thank you for getting me out of the house." I tell her, unbuckling.

"No problem." She replies.

"Bye-bye, Sky." I say, waving to the baby tucked safely in her carseat with her fist in her mouth, leaning closer to her to press a kiss to the bottom of her foot, causing her to smile and kick a little. "Bye, Sharise." I add, giving her a hug as best as I can.

"Bye, Viv."

"Call me when you get home to me know you got back safe."

"I will. Love you." She calls before I close the door.

"Love you, too." I shut the door with my bags in hand and step to the front door, fiddling with my keys.

Just as I step inside, I furrow my brows at the sound of Rabid dog fight, until I realize it's Nikki screaming.

"You're not making any fucking sense so just shut the fuck up!" He yells and I start cautiously walking to our bedroom, putting my ear to the door, hearing a woman crying. "Stop whining and just go fuck yourself! Fuck you! Fuck Jesus and get the fuck outta my house!" He barks louder and the door is flying open and I'm met with a distraught, jittery Vanity, who's eyes are wide as can be, and the smell of burnt cocaine nearly knocks me to the floor.

She stumbles past me and out the front door, barefoot, and I'm dropping my things to go check on her.

"Hey, do you need me to call you a cab or your driver?" I ask her as she continues to walk to our gate at the end of the driveway.

"N-No, I got it." She assures me, shakily, and I feel like I'm looking at a beaten puppy.

"Vanity, I can call someone to take you back home. It's a long way from here." I try to persuade her but she keeps shaking her head.

"I'm fi...fine, Viv, I promise." She insists.

"Do you at least want your shoes?" I ask, my thumb pointing in the direction of our house.

"No, I'm fine." She wipes her tear stained cheeks frantically. "I'll get them later."

She turns to keep walking but I look down at her feet that are only covered by her thin black stockings, then down at my shoes.

"Vanity, here." I pull my sneakers off and she watches me, her eyes struggling to keep focus as I crouch down and put them on her feet, tying them in a double knot so they won't come untied and trip her up. "You can just give them back whenever you can." I add and she gives me a nod.

I step back into the house, and don't even bother Nikki.

I don't feel like putting up with his nasty attitude.

A few hours later, I hear the bedroom door open, and he's slowly coming into the living room, turning on the T.V. and flipping it to MTV.

"Vanity was here." I say to him, turning a page in my book, as more of a statement than a question and he just stares at the television. "I don't like when she's here while I'm not around. I always come home to you two coked out and fighting. It scares me." I tell him.

"I dont know why." He mumbles and I roll my jaw.

"Because when you freebase you always end up waving a gun around." I state. "I'd hate to be the woman married to the murderer of Vanity."

"If you knew the whole story you wouldn't care if she died or not." He scoffs to himself and I furrow my brows.

"Well, then, what's the whole story?" I ask, putting the book down and he sighs out, shaking his head a little.

"She just picks fights. She likes to pick fights with me." He says and I rub my lips together.

"Well, damn, Nikki, I do that. That doesn't mean you scream at her like you do to me." I take up for her and he rolls his eyes.

"Vivian, I'm not arguing with you so just shut up." He tells me, tiredly.

"Are you back on junk?" I ask next and he let's out a heavy breath.

"Vivian." He snaps, glaring at me. "Drop it."

"I take that as a 'yes'." I mumble.

"Why the hell do you not stop when I ask you to?" He asks me sharply.

"I'll stop picking at you when you want me to, when you stop the drugs when I ask you to."

"And this is why I liked you better a few years ago because you kept your fucking mouth shut unless I wanted it open." He stands up, walking away.

"Yes, because me keeping my mouth shut out of fear of my significant other was so much better than feeling comfortable enough to voice my concerns for you." I trail behind him as he steps to the kitchen and grabs a beer from the fridge. "Nikki," I breathe out and he ignores me, causing me to cringe as he cracks open the beer bottle lid with his teeth, and before he can spit it in the floor, I'm plucking it from between his teeth. "I'm not trying to be a bitch or piss on your parade." I tell him, softly, throwing the lid away as he takes a swig of the beer, leaning against the counter. "I'm worried about you. Our friends are worried about you. Doc is worried about you."

"Doc's only worried about me because the office is on his back because I'm apart of the label's money train and if they lose me, they lose Mötley Crüe, and all the money we bring in." He states.

I feel bad, because it's true.

"I'm fine, Viv." He lies as he puts on a fake smirk that tries to tell me he has it under control, but it's really telling me he needs help...even if he doesn't realize he does.

He puts his beer on the counter beside him before pulling at my hand, tugging me to him, wrapping his arms around me and I hold him with my arms around his waist, looking up at him, trying not to gag because he smells like straight cocaine and sweat.

"I wanna write a song about you for the album." He tells me, his hand running through my hair.

"Are you being serious or deflecting from the fact I'm not very happy with you right now?" I ask, raising a brow.

"If I wanted to deflect anything I'd just bend you over and go to town." He shrugs and I cut my eyes at him.

He licks his lips before leaning down, but I put my hand over his mouth, stopping him from kissing me.

"After you get a shower and brush your teeth."

I'd hoped his spat with Vanity was the last for the day.

I shouldn't have thought that highly of him to only have one freebase session.

The house is pitch dark, not even the lamp in the living room is on.

Nikki must've cut it off when he went back to our bedroom.

I ended up falling asleep as he was taking a shower, and he didn't bother to wake me up when he was done.

I wait for my eyes to adjust to the darkness, padding over the fluffy carpet of our living room after I get off the couch and stretch.

My hands carefully feel around to make sure I don't run into anything while my feet make slow, deliberate steps.

I get to the door of our room, that isn't locked, surprisingly, and I turn the door knob.

It lets out an eerie, growling "creak" as it opens and I smell bitter drugs and hear heavy, loud breathing coming from the closet, gasps escaping between each breath as Nikki scrambles around.

I can't see anything but the very faint glow of a small tea candle in the closet that he's using to see what he does, but I know he's in there.

I take one step into our room, and a wail of the deepest fear cracks through the air before a booming gun shot chases after it.

I'm hitting the floor as fast as I can, screaming as my ears ache from the noise as he just starts shooting repeatedly, and the house shakes, my only chance of protection is getting under the bed and I rush to get there, covering my ears as my spine paralyzes with fear and more shots fire out. I hear things in our house breaking and shattering from  buckshot that flies through the open doorway as Nikki is shouting "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!" with raw tears in his voice.

I keep a hand over my mouth to keep from crying too loud or else he'll open fire in this direction and keep his aim low.

I don't know if I'm hit or not, I'm scared to move around a little just to see, because he'll hear me shifting around on the carpet.

He thinks something is attacking him, he isn't thinking about it being me.

I wait for several minutes, trying not to breathe loud.

Thinking he's settled down, I shift from under the bed as quietly as I possibly can.

My ankle pops with my movement, and I immediately know I've fucked up the second he starts up again, and I feel the pressure of a smatter of shrapnel grip to my thigh and I fall on the ground, my instincts kicking in to get the hell away.

This time I crawl out of our room until I'm tucked behind the wall that leads to the living room then I'm standing and tripping over things in the floor to get to the phone in the living room, praying to God that Nikki doesn't get ballsy and get out of the closet to try to chase whatever he's hallucinating that I am, out of the house with more shots.

I'm turning on the lamp and dialing my emergency number before turning the lamp off and dragging myself to the christmas tree in the corner, holding the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" Fred croaks tiredly.

"Fred..." I whisper.

"Viv? Why the fuck are you whispering?"

"N-Nikki's got a gun." I say as calmly as I can, another "BOOM" zipping through the house and I put my hand over my mouth to keep myself from screaming.

"Vivian, what the hell is going on?!" I can tell the sound of a gun has woken him up as panic fills his voice.

"He's got a gun, he's hallucinating, I got hit with some buckshot but I don't know how much." I very quietly say.  "Don't call the cops. He'll get in trouble." I add, taking deep breaths as the pain starts to set in.

"Viv, I'm coming, alright? I'm coming, get somewhere and get still. I'm coming." He promises.

"Please, hurry, Fred, I'm scared." I plead under my breath, tears rolling down my cheeks.

"I'm coming, I promise. I'm hurrying. I promise." He hangs up and a wave of quiet sobs rocks through my body, my eyes squeezing closed as I beg God to let Nikki come down.

I just got a sprinkling of metal pellets from the shell that the majority missed me, and it was in the side of my thigh, but I felt like satan had dug his nails into my leg, down to the bone.

By the time Fred's unlocking our door, and switching on the light, a angry look on his face as he has his pistol out, he heads to our bedroom before coming to me.

"He's out cold." He tells me, turning on the other light over the living room. "Holy fuck, Viv." He says and I look down at my thigh, fear gripping at my heart and I start crying.

My skin is torn to shreds, deep, black tails of metal are deep in my flesh and I'm bleeding everywhere.

"Alright, we gotta get you to the hospital." He tells me, scooping me up and my heart pounds.

"Is Nikki gonna be in trouble?" I ask him frantically, starting to get more and more worked up.

"We don't have to tell them how this happened, Vivian. You probably need fucking surgery to get that shit out of you or you're fucked. You don't have a choice." He states, carrying me out to his car.

Turns out buckshot is more brutal than I expected. I was rushed into surgery while Fred contacted Doc, and he got ahold of the guys before going to see notify Nikki he had shot his fucking wife.

Once I was finally out of surgery, they were pumping me full of morphine to ease the pain of my shredded thigh because they had to cut into more of me to dig around to get all the metal out.

"I want a divorce." I mumble to the sound of Doc and Fred talking quietly amongst themselves, as I come to, but keep my eyes shut.

"How're you feeling?" Doc asks me and I force my eyes open, squinting through my sleep.

"My husband just tried to fucking kill me. I'm not okay." I grumble, trying to sit up in the bed, expecting to feel the pain I felt before surgery from my thigh, but I don't feel anything.

I barely feel my emotions. "Am I drugged?" I ask them tiredly, glancing up at the IV drip they have me on.

Fred and Doc don't say anything, just observing my experience with the first strong drug I've been in contact with.

I lean back, actually relieved that I truly don't give a shit about anything right now.

"I get it, now." I scoff, closing my eyes.

"Vivian--"

"Did I hear Duff, earlier?" I cut Doc short. "Or was I dreaming?"

I recall hearing Duff slurring "where's he fucking at? I'll fucking kill the motherfucker? Where's he fucking at?" but can't decide if I was dreaming or if he was actually here at some point.

"He's in the waiting room with Steven and Slash." Doc informs me. "We had to get him calmed down before he got himself kicked out."

"He wants to kick Sixx's ass." Fred informs me and I smile a little to myself.

"I wanna kick Sixx's ass, too." I agree. "Go get them. I feel like I'm about to fall asleep again and I wanna see them before I go."

"Alright." Fred stands up and steps out of the room.

"The bullshit has got to stop, Doc." I tell him, hoarsely. "The heroin. The coke. The alcohol. All of it. I'm getting tired of fighting." I admit and he let's out a breath.

"I know, Viv."

"I'm so tired."

"When we get you out of here, I'll talk to him."

"Does he know where I'm at?"

"I tried to wake him up and tell him but he was too doped on smack." He explains.

"He told me he wasn't on smack anymore." I say, finding it weird that I know I feel sad, but unable to feel the weight behind the emotion.

Before he can reply, the knocking on the door signals Duff's arrival as he slowly opens it.

"Hey!" I greet him as cheerfully as I can, my eyes barely able to keep open.

"Hey, Viv." He tries to play off his feelings but I can tell he's been worried. "Uh, Slash and Steven had to head home but they're coming later on." He adds. "No, it's okay, you're here. That's all I cared about." My cold hand reaches out for his hand and he's taking it.

"I'll leave you two alone for a little." Doc tells us. "I'll see if I can reach Tommy and Vince, now."

He leaves us alone and Duff's rubbing his lips together.

"You've been drinking." I say with lack of filter.

"Yeah, I was out partying." He tries to play it off with a smile.

"I was, too." I reply, grinning lazily and he let's out a soft breath. "Oh, come on, if I can't joke about getting shot, I'll cry and I'm tired of crying so just humor me."

"I think I've been humoring you the past year, Vivian. Every time you've sworn he was gonna change." He says a little more seriously.

"He didn't mean to do this, Duff. He didn't. He gets high, and he gets scared, and he thinks something's after him."

"Fred told me if you would have been hit with the brunt of the shot, your leg would have been useless, Viv."

"But I didn't." I argue softly, a tear trailing down my cheek. "God keeps me safe."

"I don't think God wants you staying in a relationship with someone who fucking puts the life he gave you, in danger." He states.

"Do you even believe in God?" I completely belittle what he just said. "Because if not, it's in your best interest not to speak on His behalf." I finish.

"How the fuck are you so argumentative when you're on morphine?" He asks, managing to bury the argument that was brewing.

"I don't fucking know I'm just tired." I let out.

"I can go, I just needed to see you were--"

"--Can you sleep with me?" I ask him out of nowhere.

"I don't want to piss anybody off." He tells me, but I know he really means, "I don't want to risk Nikki finding out and getting the wrong idea."

"My ass is hanging out of this gown, thigh looks like a fucking piranha got a hold of it, and I've had to use the bathroom in front of a nurse so she can monitor the consistency of my shit. I feel violated in every sense. I don't give a fuck what people think of my best friend sleeping in the bed with me for comfort's sake."

"Scoot over." He says, and I gently move the best I can to make room for him.

He gets in next to me, lifting his arm to rest above his head so I can lay beside him comfortably, and before long, his soft snoring brings a peaceful blanket of serenity and wraps it around me as I give into the drugs in my system pulling me into a sleep so I can help myself heal.