#anyone knows who the older woman is?
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Christian, Alessandra and Ekaterina of Hanover arrive at the Cathedral of the Annunciation of Santa Maria to attend the wedding of Princess Theodora of Greece, to Matthew Kumar in Athens | September 28, 2024
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Okay but also because I'm a pedantic bitch...in relation to that post I just reblogged explaining part of gay-on-gay bigotry...what if some people are just assholes who happen to be gay, or bi or trans? And they're all for oppression or just plain cruelty as long as it's aimed at other people? Like that's also something to consider.
I don't actually think, any longer, that "internalized self-hate projected outward and also suppressed envy for someone who's doing and being all the things you were convinced into not allowing yourself" is...all there is to this phenonemon. And I wish we'd stop fixating on that quite so much just because we want to be frankly, nicer than some of these people have ever deserved. It's always more satisfying on some level, to imagine your enemies as Tortured deep inside (whether it's because you feel a bit malicious or you just want to believe that there's a way to reach out and heal them with kindness.) than to admit that Sometimes They're Just a Shithead.
Now, do I think that complex can be a big part of it? Oh yeah. And of COURSE, different people have different motivations in different amounts and yadda yadda yadda. No group of people, ethnic, gender, political or otherwise is a Monolith. (For one thing, when it comes to these Pick-Me Gay/Trans pundits and Influencers, money and clout should never be left out as an explanation. Just saying.) But that's the point, isn't it? Any ONE explanation can't explain them all completely.
Tbh, I think we need to consider some people are just bullies who happened to be born not cis or straight. And even if they were bullied at one point for their identity, they learned absolutely nothing from the experience except Don't Be On the Social Reject Side. So they moved their thinking just enough that "woman who likes women" "man who likes men" "I just happened o want to be a woman instead, or a man instead despite how I was born" could be put in the Safe category and they fight for that. Everyone else though, is still fair game and even a fair target. Some people don't just want power to escape oppression and live their lives in peace, they WANT to BE the ones oppressing. Like, do we ACTUALLY understand that LGBT people are humans too and that that includes the bad side?
It tracks a lot better too, when you consider that a lot of people like the masc4masc gays are openly racist and fatphobic. "No fems" Yes but also "No fats. No Asians." Christ, I could think of countless examples of white thin (and sometimes but not necessary cis) queer people doing that sort of thing. I'm sure y'all can too. This idea of some poor lost soul Tormented by Self Hate and Envy of the Freedom of Others doesn't do shit to explain that. Like, even if the two things coexist and they can, it doesn't explain that part.
I honestly just think the uglier but more accurate truth is that lot of queer people aren't all Hashtag Gay or Trans Rights or aren't Liberal out of any sense of justice AT ALL but only self-interest. Being an activist because you're a member of an oppressed group is like, entirely normal and fine of course BUT it becomes real clear when someone's framework of ethics and politics is PURELY "I think me (and people I personally like and approve of) being oppressed is bad" and literally not one inch deeper.
You can tell because if it was deeper, why would they find it so easy to turn around to a fellow queer/trans person to jeer at and humiliate and throw them under the bus if they think they're a Deadweight to the group by being a Weirdo I Don't Want to Stand Next to, Eww...or if they just don't personally like them? Why have you clearly spent absolutely no time unpacking any of the prejudice and biases around gender sexuality (or GOD FORBID race) that society throws at you.. at least no more time than it takes to rationalize yourself out of the category of Should Be Destroyed and Oppressed?
We are not immune from this sort of terminally self-interested activism. I just feel like we'd get a lot further as a society, as a community, if sometimes our analysis of bullies and assholes didn't fixate on finding some deep pain and trauma inside them, to explain their actions in a way that makes them look more tortured and less malicious (even if we say, even mean, that it's not supposed to be an excuse). Sometimes people are just racist, or fatphobic. Sometimes lesbians or gay men or bi or trans people just want to be judgmental bullies too.
Sometimes the reality isn't Tragic Villain Backstory. Sometimes, its just a selfish, deeply pathetic person refusing to become any less, because it's easier not to; even if you had a unique chance to see how the other side lives, a chance your straight cis bully peers didn't get by virtue of their identities.
#(same mentality as women who think every abortion is evil besides theirs. Freedom for me not for thee#ppl act like that's so shocking I used to. But now I'm just like...well have we considered Selfishness?#these women only rationalized and unpacked enough to make an exception for themselves.#and then actively refused to learn a thing from the experience. They carried on being as misogynistic as ever#judging all other women and claiming pregnancy is an appropriate punishment for not doing Everything Right#(except when its me). you can tell by that. They just happen to be misogynists with self-interest#human beings have an AMAZING ability to do all kinds#of mental gymnastics to believe things that contradict each other#we're not rational creatures. Accept this now and many more things will make sense this is an order. ANYWAY)#plus imo this Self Loathing theory fails to explain that not every feminine woman or masculine man#hates their gender presentation? Like yeah a lot of the makeup and diet culture is awful but#there are always gonna be ppl who want to dress a certain way regardless of societal pressure#making it exponentially harder to detangle where your Genuine Wants end and that begins.#the downsides of being social animals. And I guess I just don't know who's served#by pretending that's not a thing. The older i get the more i think we need to be careful before#our honest attempts to explain why peoole fight for systems/things that cause them trouble turn into infantilization#it's very possible to turn condescending and infantilizing going all Oh People Don't Know What's Best For Them#They're All Brainwashed. Give oppressed people the agency to be assholes too#plus it just leaves these ppl the opportunity to go I Don't Hate Myself#lmao loser.' Whereas 'you're just an asshole who doesn't care about anyone but yourself getting hurt'#is while not something they might be swayed by or care about a lot harder to refute.#we can't always know what goes on in people's heads. Going by their actions is helpful tho
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i love makoto so much but fanon does her so much better (the good parts of the fandom) because in the game her character is so lack luster. they butchered her confidant it is so borning and not even about her. they made her a cop. A COP. they pushed this "canon waifu" role onto her (before sumire came along and did it Even Worse). and it SUCKS because SHE IS SO MUCH MORE!!! SHE IS SO MUCH BETTER!!!! SHE COULD'VE BEEN SO MUCH BETTER!!! the way i feel about canon makoto is the same way i feel about the canon ryuji events post komoshida where he's horribly mistreated and used purely as comic relief: i ignore them <3 my game now <3 never happened <3 my ocs <3
You are so right. I generally apply this to all characters in p5 bc the game does such a shit job of staying consistent with character arcs and personalities. Theres a desperate need to throw in perverse jokes at the expense of female characters and a need to show that the police (as a whole) are reliable people who are not influenced by things like money and power; only the BAD cops do that. Not to mention this obvious fatphobia and homophobia but i feel likes thats a given.
But back to Makoto. Shes a victim of bad writing just like everyone else. Ryuji during the kamoshida arc was fighting with self loathing and genuine anxiety, and aside from the like. One comment on Panthers outfit in the metaverse, hes more than well behaved. All of that is shelved as soon as Kamoshida is gone and replaced with him being weird comic relief (and the focus of alot of sexual jokes that were nonexistent in the beginning of the game). Anns arc about self love and empowerment is completely dropped as soon as the nasty bad guy is put away (so that its good to be weird about her w the Good Guys). Makoto loses her a chunk of her personality to be the mature waifu which is INSANE to me bc shes like. Not okay or normal at all 😭😭😭 she THINKS shes responsible and so does everyone else on her team, but its an act! She doesnt know shit! And she doesnt know that she doesnt know shit bc shes respectful and adults dont care about anything as long as u respect them!
Its very telling that for literally every single thief (and goro), you can see the exact moment the writers gave up on adding anything of worth to their characters outside of the social links. Its like they didnt know what to even do w the characters at their disposal after their main arcs were complete. No mention of friends hanging out without you, no mention of having group hangouts. Everyone is treated as a core, important member of the friend group DURING their arc, but outside of it, they are acquaintances at best. Theres nothing in the game that convinces you that these guys are legitimately friends who care for each other and do Friend Things. And i describe it like that bc there IS a game that treats them all as friends, and its strikers! Strikers/Scramble genuinely feels like the game p5 wanted to be; a road trip w your team where they stay up at night talking to each other and hanging out and doing things together that dont necessarily include you, the player. Its refreshing and lovely but it sucks that u get that kind of attention to detail in a ‘spinoff’ title
#chattin#i hesitate to use spinoff bc its a pretty big game#and theres an amazing plot with wonderful characterization#and their handling of jails and jail owners is LEAGUES better than the bs they tried to make up w palace users#and all the thieves feel like family. and not in the annoying fandom way; like#were family in the same way a family is forged and tended to. i love you. no one is left behind. no one is made to feel inferior another#its really good and honestly if u want more interactions between everyone i really recommend a playthrough#but yeah#p5 sucks#i love it but i love the version of it i made in my head LMAO#maybe p5r did a better job w the dialogue and some questionable scenes#(i wouldnt know. i didnt play it lol)#so maybe thats what people need to be using as a point of reference#but i only plyed p5 so this is what i have; a group of people who show up for meetings and then go about their life#and that kinda sucks. why make this wholly unique experience in which these teens can only relate to each other#make them bonded over their shared experience w this unbelievable world#and then not only make them NOT interact; but have the end be ‘okay by akira.’ and leave it at that#they just. didnt know what to do w anyone#they needed their girls to be waifubait and the boys to be an afterthought#they needed a buffet of older woman for pathetic men to fuck through their self insert#and they needed a story convoluted enough to keep people stuck trying to figure it out themselves#its bad. its so bad. its so fucking bad. but i have to be here. WE have to be here.#bc who else is going to take these characters out of hell and treat them right ??!!!
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rupert's first ex wife, who knew from the moment he had met rebecca, that she was done for,,,,,,, who held so much resentment and anger at this younger, beautiful woman....... but it's been over fifteen years, and she's watching things unravel in the papers and she's watching rebecca take over richmond,,,,, an she's proud of her. no longer is she letting her pain/anger over rupert's infidelity consume how she feels about rebecca,,,
#s3 but the writers let rebecca + the ex wife bond ad connect like they did with bex and rebecca#let this older woman accept them into her home and she can pour them tea#i bet she gardens. i bet she makes good food with what she gets from her garden#and i know she goes to richmond matches without anyone knowing who she is bc she gets a kick#knowing rupert would hate her celebrating this team#especially since rupert was the owner since 1987....their marriage definitely fell into that time frame#so she was ALSO watching the team. she also loved them#hmmmm
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my mother was genuinely trying to make the argument that people do not fundamentally care about each other’s stories and only care in the ways they can relate their stories to their own experiences and therefore no one should ever try to make new plot lines or share their stories bc it’s all been told before and the only point to you sharing your story is for your own therapy bc no one actually cares and humans aren’t actually pack animals but lone wolves and we keep saying we want to change the world and we could so easily overthrow people in power but bc no one actually cares about each other we don’t do it and just give up. I have never been more certain in my whole life that I am right in saying she could not be more wrong. for the love of god please just share an orange with someone
#this is the same woman who will start yelling at the tv if she can follow the plot that’s coming within the first five mins#and has said before she hates people talking to her and doesn’t care what anyone has to say#like of fucking course you think that!!!! but not everyone has the same brain rot as you!!!!#and if you actually think that’s true in all your fifty years of wisdom from living#then be the fucking exception!!!!! care!!!!!! about something or someone!!!!!#jesus fuck!!!!!#I tried to argue but she gave me a look that was like#‘uh huh but I’m so much older than you I’ve Seen The World I Know better’#like. the length of your life does not make you more correct than me by default#sorry I’m ranting I’m just like. jfc then fucking care!!!!! do something instead of wallowing in self pity#and saying that you’re just ‘noticing the truth’ instead of being a martyr#anyway.#go hug somebody. lay in the grass in the sun
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"i mess up things and then i don't have the energy to fix them up" yes brain true sentence but no brain the appropriate response is NOT "therefore i should kill myself (and here's how)"
#tw suicide#i wish i was joking#i am just so so tired of keeping myself alive! can't someone else do it for a change? or better yet kill me??#said something to the emergency room psych#she queried it and i confirmed i had said precisely what i intended#she blinked and said 'i usually hear that from jaded forty year olds not twenty year olds'#i won't share what because it was a highly specific explanation of precisely how i might see myself suiciding or how/whether i thought i#could. she asked me and i answered. apparently she wasn't expecting that level of detail and confidence#is it funny to anyone else that i always struggle with confidence but i can confidently tell her specifics about suicide thoughts?#this is reminding me of the fifteen year old yesterday i was conversing with and he randomly started listing all the suicide methods he#could think of and i was internally like you missed a dozen i can think of. didn't say that obvs#i don't know i am. tired. of everything. and i had a long and good conversation with an older woman from church last night (mother of the#boy. i have confided in her before she's great)#she's hte only person irl who now knows about the second suicide attempt (tho she doesn't know it was the second) and she was encouraging m#to see the psych and escalate care#but all day ive been regretting telling the psych or bro or anyone honestly#it would be so much EASIER to have said nothing and gone through with my plan#i wouldn't trust myself not to rn if i had access#i mean. i know multiple ways in this room i could kill myself. but i won't#there's a couple of specific methods that are most of the thoughts usually so they're the specific ones i gotta watch out for more if that#makes sense#ooh gosh im rambling i should shut up xD#personal#puddleglum hours
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some of you know that i don't like tiktok n it has many reasons but i have had a rant brewing in regards to it for a while and it's definitely extremely prevalent on tiktok
it is not your place to judge people's relationships, even the toxic ones
i know we all go like "yeah duhh" but i want you to actually take in what i'm saying. it's not your place. just because they exist in an age where things can be found online, doesn't mean it's your place. people are allowed to have the human experience. people are allowed to fall in love with the wrong people, and people are allowed to have toxic experiences and people are allowed to be stupid and make mistakes, even public ones
definitely if the person in question is a young woman. like genuinely, i think there is nothing more disrespectful and ironically, anti woman than determining for some young woman that she shouldn't be in a relationship with some older dude. it's not up to you. yea maybe she's making a mistake and will regret in in 3 years, and so fucking what? that's life. young women are able to choose, for themselves, even if the choice is stupid.
billy dating that goofy fucking dude and getting so much shit for it bc what? she whose wrong? yea, i'm pretty sure she made a conscious choice, so stop. she'll survive her mistake. trying to keep young women from experiencing life, even the bad parts of life, isn't doing anyone a fucking favor. its just dismissive of the fact that they can make their own choices for fuck sake.
some nineteen year old ending up married to her high school teacher because they wanted to, getting called out because it's weird and creepy? they're living their lives. who are you to criticize random people? even if it is weird. even if it is true. it's not your fucking place.
a thirty year old woman married to a seventy year old guy and they are living their life and existing in a space where people can see it, but now suddenly it has to be called out bc that's toxic and gross. ok, it's also not your fucking relationship. stop butting in where you're not asked. it is so unbelievably disrespectful and honestly, i'm sick of seeing it. everyone needs to keep their nose in their own business
the easy access of drama on tiktok has made everyone believe that everything is drama that you should stick your nose into. it's not. other people's lives and mistakes shouldn't be your entertainment. young women making bad choices for themselves isn't a hill you need to die on. you aren't being an ally. you aren't being a feminist. you aren't being appropriate.
it isn't your place. it isn't your place. i'm sick of it
#tw.rant#tw rant#i'm sorry i just;;; am getting really tired of#liberal or leftist youtubers acting like#them talking about normal people who's drama blew up#is allyship to anyone#young women can date and make the wrong choice#and it still aint any of your fucking business when they do realize#they made a mistake#if no one is committing a crime#leave them tf alone#leave gold diggers alone#leave toxic age gaps alone#leave weirdos w weird kinks alone#leave people with values that arent yours alone#you can warn once (1ce)! and then they can make their own choices#as a young woman myself who has actively dated much older men#i hate the fucking fake activism people engage in talking about age gaps#i knew with my big grown up brain what i was doing ok#most young women know
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Kirk: *clueless and unable to read a paper map because he’s from space*
La’an: *sighs* give it. (I don’t care you’re a captain and I’m just a lieutenant, I’m gonna boss you around)
is such a great dynamic. Can it be like that pls?
(McCoy and Spock would just let him figure it out you know)
#i wanna know how old kirk is. if la'an is five years older here or if they're around the same age#kirk needs a woman to boss him around#snw nonsense#kirk x la'an#ka'an#snw spoilers#i don't care for any other episode in this season. i just want this one not to disappoint#(i mean i have no idea what other episodes are about lol)#i only spoiled summaries for myself for the first three. after that? idk what's in store and which scenes in trailers belong where#jim kirk#la'an noonien singh#i've frequently found that interviews and whatevers are always misleading. occasionally pandering. and the end result is always different#so i don't read interviews#i read one related to s2 and the guy who's in charge said the cage was still to happen so i'm never reading another interview lol#by anyone
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Both Dany and Sansa being children and yet being continuously described as beautiful and YET the only men who are explicitly "attracted" them outside of their titles are creepy fkn old men like Jorah and Petyr.........jail. hell even.
#theres something here but i am too annoyed to put it together#something something beauty is supposed to benefit you as a woman and yet it just really doesnt because both dany and sansa are so lonely#And yet they dont have anyone nice their age who actually likes them for them ;_;#makes me sad#daario is a weird case cause hes quite a bit older than dany and id argue is is primarily interested in her power#but hes also like said to be attractive on his own merits and dany approaches him? still bleh tho#we need to get them on the westerosi version of the farmer wants a wife#least dramatic romance tv show ever i know theyd thrive in that environment
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I hate working with men
#have a male coworker who has been doing his job HORRENDOUSLY wrong#to the point that everyone else is having to take HOURS of their shifts to fix what he’s fucked up#and APPRENTLY several of my coworkers have tried to talk to him about it and correct him#and he’s been getting so goddamn offended and butthurt over it and acting like he’s not doing anything wrong#(and this is important the ppl who have tried talking to him are all older women. one in her 40s one in her 50s and one in her 60s)#ONE OF WHOM IS OUR DEPARTMENT MANAGER#and I was bitching about him today#and one of them was like ‘well maybe you should try correcting him’#and I was like why 1. not my job I’m not a manager but 2. he’s not listened to anyone else why would he listen to me#and she was like ‘well it will feel less threatening from you less like he’s getting scolded by a mom so he might take it better’#and like. HM! WELL!#I know this is a crazy wild absolutely batshit suggestion#but when a man gets told what to do/corrected by women (who have all been doing this job SIGNIFICANTLY longer)#and his reaction to is to act like a little fucking disrespectful piss baby#WE JUST WRITE HIM UP LIKE WE WOULD ANYONE ELSE INSTEAD OF TRY TO APPEAL TO HIS FWAGIL TEENY TINY EGO#LIKE IDK SEEMS LIKE THE NORMAL COURSE OF ACTION TO ME?????#not make the androgynous goth bitch in their 20s try to correct him cuz I’m SOMEHOW less threatening#I’m read as a woman he’s gonna have the same damn reaction#I just. ugh. UGH#I fucking hate men#kaz rambles
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I am staring DIRECTLY at Film Reroll Luke Skywalker watching and anticipating his next move
#film reroll#the film reroll#Tim Nolan you played him so well!!!!#I don’t think this will happen but this version of Luke is one I can kinda see turning to the dark side??#like think about it. your aunt and uncle are killed. Ben Kenobi tells you it’ll be alright though and that you have the force in you#you can come with him and train to be a Jedi just like your father was#you leave planet and on the way have to put up with this asshole smuggler and even free a serial killer just to get to the rebels#but it’s fine! because once you’re with the rebels you’ll then be able to train with Ben like he’s promised#except you get there and there are two other Jedi candidates. each seemingly better options than you#one is a child who already has pretty good control of the force without anyone telling her how to wield it.#she’s also young and thus full of so much more potential than you#and the other is a woman older than you. but she has so much more life experience. she’s proven herself worthy both to the rebels#and to the force itself. she is strong and basically everything you’re not#but that’s alright too because Ben knows you. of course he’s going to pick to train you!! but then they say your name Skywalker with horror#and you are told about who your father is and how if you are trained and given everything you want you will become just like him#you are evil and violent by nature even though you feel as if you are anything but… except maybe they’re right#because when confronted with this fact your first instinct was to attack an injured man on death’s door#and if Kenobi has his time taken up by training either kahki or Jyn/planning the destruction of the Death Star#Luke is potentially left in a very vulnerable state to stew#I just am foaming at the mouth thinking about it!!!!#(I do feel like Andy will ultimately take Luke in a more redemption/I am not my father by ‘righteous’ sacrifice’ route though#which also has a lot of potential to be delicious)
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i was hanging out today w a friend i hadn't seen in awhile and kaily and i were catching up on all the drama involving him (my controlling manipulative and abusive ex-friend) and how he keeps going out of his way to ask ppl about where we are and find us and how the only reason i think i get out of it is bc i don't go to the same college as him anymore, i hardly ever leave the house socially and the few ppl i do see all have no connection w him anymore, and i don't work at some place where he can just show up. i work in pre-k-to-12 public schools. my schedule in terms of days/location is irregular anyway, but if some strange adult man shows up for no particular reason and seeks out a female employee, you do not just get let in. that is how you have the cops called on you. but he does know where i live and i have been paranoid about him finding some excuse to show up at my house. i've had legitimate nightmares about that. i never stopped having nightmares about him i'd say at least once every other week and i haven't talked to him in almost six months.
i don't like at all how i don't feel safe in a way that means i have faith that the issue is over; the person is out of my life; our communication will not be renewed against my will once again. bc all of those things have been attempted. i feel safe in a way that means he happens, by circumstance, not to be able to access me in any convenient way to him. any way he could find me (the only way to feasibly do that would be work/home) would be a justification for calling the police. but i don't have any faith that he wouldn't try, because he has shown himself as being capable of being that low. and if i switch jobs or transfer schools finally and he finds out about it, he can just make it an issue there if he so feels like it, and i'm sure he will. he's a monster. he gets some sort of thrill out of making other ppl feel unsafe and having all the control in the situation
#tales from diana#it was very validating to talk to her bc she never really liked him#in fact i used to be so humiliated when i'd bring him to hang out w my older friends#bc he'd go oooon and on and on about how nobody listens to him nobody understands him nobody cares about or appreciates him#and then i'd be like 'oh my friends are good ppl! ill introduce u' and i did. i made the effort to bring him to them a LOT#(and he would make me feel like he envied me for my oh-so-superior life which i most definitely do not have)#but then he would not listen to her not understand her not care about her and not appreciate her#nor any of my friends for that matter. but he was SO disinterested in her in particular in a way that was just sooo disrespectful#he wouldnt let me hold a conversation w her. or let me bring her into a conversation w him. he'd DOMINATE#in general he didn't like me talking to anybody else or anyone talking to anyone else or anyone else talking#ive never seen a man who cared so little about somebody else getting to finish a sentence.#and like there's a lot of adhd in our friend group. we all (myself especially) have our spirited interjections#and occasionally interrupt but we realize when we're doing it and then pull back & let the other person finish#we try to keep other ppl on track w what they were saying when they go on a tangent#you know. we try and communicate effectively#even tho we r not naturally perfect at it lol.#we're adults who respect each other it's almost like!#but yeah. he was only interested in impressing the couple of men in my friend group essentially#he'd talk abt how my two guy friends r cool & how he wants to be closer to them#and i'd stick up for this woman i hung out w today & he had just absolutely no interest in her#she never liked him anyway which was so baller of her. good on her. she detected his rudeness#and that rudeness used to vex me so much. i suppose bc i couldnt bear to see him treat other ppl how he treated me#altho to a much lesser extent w the overt lovebombing he did to me and the traumadumping and intense reliance upon me#he seriously needed my attention 24/7 it didn't matter if i was studying or working or in bed sick for two weeks#literally he and his vapid fucking needs came before everything in my life according to him. always. crazy#the entitlement of that man is ridiculous. so of course he thinks there's nothing wrong w seeking me out#of course.#i wouldnt care if he died
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I hate how being 23 means that any woman in your extended family or near you that is your age-ish has a fiancé,,,,, like girl,,,,,, ur brain ain’t cooked yet, I haven’t kissed, or held hands romantically yet,,,,, and you’ve got fiance??????? Engaged to be wed???? And I, a spinster, am still fucking around and not even considering dating??????
#it’s okay they’re baptist#I mean my older cousin she’s 26 this year and has a kid#I’m over here#pushing fictional old men’s faces togther and saying now kith#and understanding my brain ain’t cooked yet#my I don’t know what my aunts other niece who’s a couple months younger than me#like the alt universe me it’s weird how alike we are on total accident#she’s fiancéd#I don’t feel bad about this I quite literally don’t care#I’ve not peaked yet#my peak is age 35 at the earliest#I’m gonna be a hot older butch#that’s when I peak when I can look like the stereotypical older butch lesbian#I’m just like baffled at how like#easy it is to be heterosexual in the south#I’ve seen one butch woman in Arkansas#my first win of is that a butch woman or a wildly feminine looking guy I just thirsted after#I always lose when I go ooooh then oh that’s definitely a cishet dude#anyway if anyone wants to stoop to my level and fiancé me with or without the gendered extra e thanks France for the word#I’m here I’m single as fuck#doesn’t help I’m not out to my family except my mom#I mean my oldest cousin is similarly not dating if you don’t count his best boyfriend I mean platonic bestie#I’m kidding he’s just never dated a girl like I’ve never dated a guy#so it’s getting clearer he’s probably dating his friend
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an old lady came in today, followed by a frantic and hovering younger woman
Old Lady (to my coworker): “Can you see about a book I had placed on reserve?”
Younger Woman (to OL): “Ma’am, are you sure you’re alright?”
OL (to coworker): “I think it was in last week, but I didn’t get a phone call...”
YW (to OL): “I have my insurance card in my truck, are you sure you’re okay?”
OL (to coworker): “Oh, do you have a paper towel? I’ve gotten mud on your counter... I just got hit by a car.”
Me and my coworker, who had been trying to parse this relationship: “?!?!?!?!?!!?”
The Younger Woman had side-swiped the Older Lady in the parking lot and knocked her down, and the Older Lady’s priority was literally the book she put on hold. O_O
#library#the Older Lady had been walking a straight line towards the library and the truck was cruising next to her#but the OL stepped to the side to avoid slush/snow chunk in the parking lot and walked into the broad side of the YW's truck#the OL seemed to be okay but shaken and we kind of bullied her into sitting in a chair and telling us her dtr's phone number#so we called and texted the dtr who luckily lives in town and got there in about 20 minutes#and my supe called the 911 dispatch and i guess absolutely nothing else was happening in town bc the ambo was there in literally 1 minute#and fire came too (they like to feel useful) and a police traffic officer came to get statements and stuff#the OL was like 'i'll drive myself home' and i was like 'I WILL DRIVE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL MYSELF'#the paramedics were absolutely wonderful with this lady. they were so gentle and kind (she was easy to be kind to... but still.)#and after all that?? the OL's book and come and gone but the phone notifications glitched last week and didn't alert anyone#so that poor OL didn't even have a book to read in the emergency room (her dtr and son-in-law came to get her)#my brother (also a paramedic) once ran a call for an older lady who was having chest pain and was afraid she had a heart attack#it turns out she did NOT have a heart attack-- she had been scrubbing her bathtub and the pressure from leaning on the side of the tub#LITERALLY BROKE ONE OF HER RIBS and she didn't know it until later that evening when it started hurting to breathe#so even though our Old Lady today didn't think anything was broken... :| she's 81. so yeah we harangued her into going to the hospital#'what did you do today merry?' 'i bullied an old woman into going to the hospital'#long tags
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Age of consent aside, it’s always weird when I see celebrities that are my parents’ age dating people my age, even if they’re both adults. My parents keep saying “criatura” or “chiquito” when they talk to me about people my age that they met (which is very often because of their jobs).
#I’m not infantilizing anyone. but the other day I saw that one famous guy was dating a woman and they literally had the same age difference#that my dad and I have#and it’s mind boggling when my dad clearly views people my age as super young#like even when talking about his residents. who must be like a few years older than I am he says ‘es una criatura’#ps I am aware that starting a post with ‘age of consent aside’ sounds bad. but I don’t know how else to say it#ro rambles
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SHE SAID IT'S HER FIRST TIME! — NANAMI KENTO
SYNOPSIS...older bf!nanami finds out he’s your first time and he intends to make it very special
INFO...older bf!nanami x virgin fem!reader, age gap (earlier 20s, early 30s), virginity loss, consent checks, praise, nipple sucking, fingering, pussy eating, penetration, slight blood, slight crying, creampie, nanami grows kinda feral, not proofread
OTHER...likes and reblogs are appreciated
Having Nanami as an older boyfriend was such a joy. The maturity, thoughtfulness, communication, love, commitment, and patience you received from him was more than you could have ever asked for. You were always so open with him, telling him everything and just being the annoying girl friend you were. But, there is one thing that you’ve kept hidden for the last six months of your relationship.
Every time things got heated between you Nanami while making out or getting handsy, you always backed out last minute telling him that you “weren’t ready” and he always understood and respected your boundaries. Though, you are ready. If you were to lose your virginity to anyone you’d want it to be your sweet loving boyfriend. But voices in the back of your head start to make you overthink, wonder if he’ll even want you anymore if you confess to him.
It isn’t until you’re here on his bed, hands tangled in his hair while kiss him slowly, passionately. His hands are roaming all over your body, still careful to be respectful. You’re pushing into him, smiling in between kisses. “Have I ever told you how much of an amazing kisser you are?” He chuckles, peppering kisses along your jawline.
A blissful sigh escapes your lips before you answer, “no.” You shake your head, his lips traveling lower down to your neck. Your bottom lip tucks between your teeth, enjoying the moment. His tongue glides along the skin of your neck, gently sucking and kissing, earning little whimpers from you as a reward. His hand grabs at your leg, hooking in over his waist as he pushes his hips into you.
Your breathing grows shallow, heart beating frantically against your ribcage. You gulp, feeling things grow more intense with each passing second before you push Nanami away. “I’m sorry, Kento, I just—”
“It’s alright, sweetheart. I understand you want to take your time with this kind of thing.” He gently grabs your hand, the pad of his thumb rubbing over your knuckles. His brows furrowed as he studies your features, eyes wandering every where else but into his. “What’s wrong, hm? You know you can talk to me,” he says in the most smooth voice, one that makes you wanna spill every secret. You open your mouth to say something, anything, but nothing comes out. “Sweetheart?” He draws out the pet name, he knows something is on your mind.
“Ken, I feel bad for keeping this from you for so long, but,” you sigh, fidgeting with the hem of your t-shirt, “I’m a…virgin.” You finally look in his eyes, clenching your jaw. Your entire body feels like it’s on fire, ears ringing loudly it almost drowns out your heart beat.
His lips part, eyes widening at your words. Deafening silence falls upon you like a tidal wave and you feel the embarrassment rush in. “Fuck,” you whisper, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything I…I’m just gonna go.” You quickly scramble to your feet, grabbing your sweater from off of his bedroom floor. Maybe those voices in your head were right. Why would a man like Kento want anything to do with an inexperienced girl like you, compared to a woman who would know how to please him, give him a what he wants.
Just as you were about to walk out his bedroom, you feel a tug at your arm pulling you back until you hit his broad chest. “Where are you going?” He asked, looking at you. “I never said to leave, sweetheart.” He walks you back over to the bed, taking your sweater from your hands and placing it on the back of his chair. You sit on the edge of the bed, anxiously waiting for the next words to leave his mouth. Eyes follow his every movement, watching the way he walks over to you and kneels down in front you, grabbing your hands in his. “Look at me.” And you do, eventually, meet his gaze. “What’s wrong?”
You find it hard to speak, to even get a peep out. Nerves are shot and it feels like your stomach is twisting in knots. “I just thought that—”
“That I’d be upset you’re a virgin?” He asked, putting it all out there. You nodded your head, biting the inside of your cheek. “Sweetheart,” he chuckles, flashing a smile at you, “you’re too cute for your own good.” He caresses your cheek. “No wonder you’ve been so nervous each time we’ve made out.” He licks his lips, taking a deep breath in before speaking again, “listen, we don’t have to rush into anything. You should’ve just told me, but I understand your feelings.”
You blink a couple of times, your heart rate finally drops, feeling more comfortable with the situation. It felt like a huge weight was lifted off of your shoulders, and even more importantly, you were glad Nanami took it so well. “But, I am ready.” You look away from him.
“What?” His brows furrowed, confusion written on his face.
“I’ve been ready, just been scared, nervous…I don’t know.” You shrug, your voice getting quieter with each word you say.
His hand comes up to your cheek, gently cupping it as he directs your gaze back towards him for the millionth time. “Are you asking me to be your first?” He asks in such a gentle tone, eyes carrying a look of adoration in them. Sheepishly, you nod.
“Always wanted it to be you, Ken. You’re so kind to me, and so patient,” you admit.
“Oh, sweetheart,” he coos, “I’d love nothing more than to be your first.” He kisses the top of your hand, soft lip pressing against your skin as he stares into your eyes. “We’ll go at your pace, yeah?” He smirks.
Everything in you is telling you to pounce on this man and go at it like animals with how he was treating you. It only made him a hundred more times attractive than he already was. Your lips find his as you both fall back onto the bed, resuming the make out session from minutes ago, only this time it’ll actually lead somewhere. The kisses felt more feverish, more passionate, something that’d you been craving this entire time.
“Can I take your clothes off?” He asked, placing a kiss to your jaw. “I’ll take mine off too.”
“Yeah.” You nod, feeling his hands tug at the hem of your shirt. The fabric slipped over your head, your first instinct was to cover your chest, feeling completely vulnerable in this position. His hands carefully undid your pants, pulling them down along with your panties, discarding the items of clothing on the wood floor. You covered yourself up, shutting your legs and holding your chest.
As you watched him get undressed, your eyes landed upon the obvious tent in his shorts, leaving you turned on. His body seemed liked it was carved from the gods, toned biceps, shredded six pack. He looked like he could just easily toss you around, put in whatever position he wanted. Not to mention, you could see how big he was through his boxers, your nerves starting to wrack up again as you began to wonder if it’d even fit. And once he pulled them down, your eyes widened and worry flooded your face.
Nanami let out a light laugh at the look on your face. “What’s the matter?” He asked, rubbing his hands over your thighs.
“Do you think it’ll fit? It’s just…really big, Ken.” Your eyes couldn’t help but wander. He was thick, and slightly long, which is reasonable excuse for your worry.
“It might hurt a little, sweetheart, but that’s why I need to prepare you, yeah? Make it feel good for my sweet girl. Now, don’t hide yourself from me, okay? I wanna see all of you, praise all of you.” He leaned over, kissing your lips again, trailing down further with each one. His hands replaced yours, gently groping your tits, squeezing them in his hands. “Such soft and pretty tits.” He kissed each one. “Can I suck on them? I promise you it’ll feel good.”
Once he gets your approval, he wastes no time, his lips latching onto your hard nipple, hot tongue swirling around the bud. His eyes fluttered shut, a muffled moan escaping his lips. Your hands find themselves in his hair, little pants and whimpers leaving your lips at the foreign sensation. His other hand pulls at your nipple, rolling it between his fingers as he gets lost in thought. He pulls his head up, hazy eyes staring back at you. “Doing okay, baby?” He asks.
“Yes, please keep going.” You bite down on your bottom lip, earning a smile from his as he moves over to your other nipple, tip of his tongue circling over the sensitive skin before taking it in his mouth, suckling on it. “Mmm, Ken,” you whimper, tugging at his hair.
“Feeling good?” He places kisses all over your tits, his touches so gentle. You buck your hips up towards him, grinding against him. “I’ll take that as a yes. You’re feeling needy, aren’t you, baby? Go on, you can tell me.” The flat of his tongue lays against your nipple again, slowly licking, teasing you.
You bring your hand up to your face, covering it, too embarrassed to look at him, to let him hear you. But with each flick of his tongue more whimpers spill out of you, overflowing. His warm lips press kisses to your sternum, traveling down towards your stomach, getting lower and lower until you jolt up. “What…what are you doing?” You ask, dumbly. It was clear what his intentions were with his mouth just inches away from your cunt.
“Just sit back and relax.” He caresses your side. “Open up for me, wanna get a taste,” he murmurs. He gently pushes your thighs open, scooting lower on the bed. His mouth slightly parts, eyes gravitating towards your wet cunt. “Oh, sweetheart, you’re already so wet,” he chuckles, looking up at you. He rests his head against your thighs, lips kissing your skin, worshipping you, savoring you. He plans to tease you as much as possible, he wants you ready.
You body twitches when you feel his fingers ghost over your throbbing cunt, light touches making you yearn for something you’ve never even had before. He kisses down your thighs and towards your pussy, pausing when he finally reaches. He looks up at you for approval and when you scoot your hips closer towards him with the cutest whimper, he dips his head down between your legs and presses the slowest kisses on your clit. The way you gasp makes him smirk, he wonders how you’ll sound when he uses his tongue.
Finally, you feel the flat of his hot tongue dip between your soaked folds, pushing its way up your slit and finding your clit. You sit up on your elbows, brows furrowing in pleasure as Nanami wraps your his arms around your thighs, holding your hips in place. He moans against you, pulling you closer towards him as he starves for more of your taste.
He flicks his tongue across your clit, his chin coated in your juices before he moves his tongue lower, tongue fucking you. You bite down on your plump lower lip, quietly moaning while your eyes watch his every movement, like you were studying him. His tongue slithers back to your clit, circling it before he gently sucks on it. “Hah, fuck,” you gasp, your hand instinctively reaching for his blonde locks of hair.
He lifts his head, licking his lips to not waste any drop of you. “Hey, pretty girl, can we try something?” His voice is gentle, a sense of security in it. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” The pad of his thumb rubs your clit in circles, his other hand caresses your thigh. “Wanna try fingering you while I eat this pretty pussy, get you ready for me,” he explains.
You gulp, nervously looking down at his hands. “Will it hurt as much?” You ask.
“Might hurt a little, but it’ll help. I’ll make you feel good, baby. I never wanna hurt you.” He sits up, moving closer towards you.
You nod slowly, “okay,” you meekly say. Nanami, wraps his arms around your waist, hoisting your leg around him as you both lay on your sides.
“You ready?” He asks, kissing your cheek, his fingers rubbing your slick over your entrance and back over your clit, trying to get you prepared. “Just gonna do one finger for now until you want more,” he whispers into your ear. Slowly, he slides his thick digit into your entrance and you immediately let out a pained sigh. He removes his finger, pressing another kiss to you cheek. “Take your time, baby. You’re okay. Hold on to me if it gets too much.” He continues rubbing your clit in slow circles until you give him the nod of approval to try again.
He pushes his finger past your folds, feeling your walls clench around him as he goes inch by inch. “Mmm.” Your eyes screw shut as you cling onto his broad shoulders, feeling the sting of the stretch. He finally gets it all the way through and you’re panting, clawing at his skin.
“You’re alright, sweetheart,” he reassures. “Hey, look at me,” he grabs your face in his direction, “it’s okay.” He kisses your lips as you whimper against his. “I’m gonna start moving my hand now.” You hold onto him tighter, the burn making you wince as he pulls his hand back and pushes his finger back in, slightly gaining in speed.
You can’t seem to look away from him, melting into his touch as the pain slowly turned to pleasure, feeling your body accept him just like you wanted this entire time. He presses his forehead against yours, bodies pressed up against one another as you fight back the urge to kiss him until you’re breathless. Your hips rock into his hand, following his movements. “Want more,” you whimper, nodding at him.
“Want more, pretty? Yeah?” He pecks your lips, carefully sliding his ring finger into your entrance. You whine at the stretch, taking in a deep breath when you feel his fingers curl up, repeatedly hitting your g-spot. Your cunt squelches around his fingers, sucking them in. “You’re doing such a good job,” he whispers, working fingers faster until you’re a moaning mess.
Wet kisses make their way down your neck, moving lower down to your chest as he repositions himself at the end up of the bed, fingers still curling inside you. He pushes one of your legs back, eyes intently watching the way your pussy takes his fingers so well. Without warning, the flat of his tongue presses down your swollen clit. “Oh fuck!” You gasp, gripping at the sheets below you. Your body shivers with pleasure, the sensation of his tongue and fingers sending you to cloud nine.
Your head falls back on the pillow, eyes rolling back, legs threatening to close around his head. He slurps your pussy, tongue working its way through your folds to get every last drop. He’s moaning at your taste, breathing heavily through his nose. His hand pushes your leg back farther, nearly up to your chest, as he works hard to drive that orgasm out of you. “Ah! Oh my gosh!” You cry out, clutching at his hair, pushing his head down when he sucks on your sensitive clit once more. “Ken, baby, I think—fuck!” You squeal, rocking your hips on his face. Your legs close around his head as your orgasm arrives, body quivering, and every touch is heightened. That doesn’t stop Nanami, low eyes watching how prettily your back arches off the bed, your walls squeezing his fingers. “Hah! Ah! Yes!” You moan.
Nanami finally lifts his head, chest heaving up and down as he looks at you with the most love in his eyes. “Fuck, baby, you did so good. Come here.” He rushes to plant his lips on yours, letting you taste yourself on his tongue. His dick is throbbing, oozing pre from the tip just from watching you cum. “You alright?” He asks, petting your cheek.
“I’m okay.” You nod. “Thank you.” The sweetest smile spreads across your face, one that makes his chest fill with warmth. “But, I think I’m finally ready.” You look down towards where you two meet, only inches away from one another.
“You sure? We don’t have to if you don’t want to. I want you to be comfortable,” he says softly.
“I promise I am. Just…go slow,” anxiousness riddled your tone.
“Of course. Let me know at any time if you wanna stop.” He presses a kiss to your forehead. The nerves build in your chest, and your stomach fills with butterflies. He repositions his hips, rubbing his length through your folds, smearing his precum. He lightly groans, slowly moving up and down, nudging your clit with each thrust. Nanami notices you watching, he can see you’re still nervous. “Baby, look at me, okay. It’s gonna be fine.” He gently grabs your face, staring into your eyes before his fat tip pushes its way through your folds. Your eyebrows raise in surprise before furrowing. He goes as slow as possible before removing himself, letting you take a breather.
You spread your legs further before another attempt, wrapping your arms around his neck. He pushes into you again, inch by inch you feel the stretch, the stinging sensation making you grit your teeth. “Ah!” You bury your face in his neck, when you feel his hips finally meet with yours.
Tears fall down your cheeks, and he’s quick to kiss them away. “I know it hurts, sweetheart. Let’s stay like this for a minute.” He wipes your tears, massaging your thighs as you try to accustom to his size. “Gonna start moving now.” He pulls his hips back, his length coated in a mix of your juices and slight blood. “Oh, your bleeding baby.” He looks at you with the most empathetic expression.
“Mmmph, sorry, I’m sorry.” A wave of embarrassment washes over you as it came to mind that it was most likely on his sheets.
“There’s nothing to apologize for. It’s completely normal.” He kisses your lips as he pushes his hips against your again, the head of his cock grazing over a sweet spot deep inside you that you didn’t even know existed. “I’m so proud of you, you know that?Hah, my sweet, sweet girl—fuck,” he breathily chuckles. And now he’s moving faster, wrapping your legs around his waist, clinging onto him like you never want to let go. “So fucking tight,” he grunts.
You feel so full of him, like he was made for you. His dick dragging along your walls, his hands holding you close, wrapping around you as he whispers praises in your ear in the most sweetest voice. Your eyes roll back, nails leaving marks on his skin, your toes pointed. He’s fucking you into the mattress, but being oh so gentle about it. “It feels so good,” you mewl as he fucks you deep, his balls slapping against your ass with each thrust.
“This pussy was made for me baby—oh shit—taking me so fucking well. You feel so fucking good,” he moans. He presses into you, each thrust sending your mind spiraling as shivers run down your spine, your body covered in sweat. Nanami squeezes you tightly, kissing your neck, and nibbling at the skin.
“Ah! Ah! Ah!” It feels like your breath is being sucked out of you, your heart beating rapidly against your ribcage. “Gonna cum!” You cry out. “Hah—yes, yes!” He keeps the same rhythm, tip of his dick kissing your cervix before your shaking under him.
He holds you tightly, pressing his sweaty forehead against yours, staring into your eyes as you cum around his dick. Your hands cup his face, searching his eyes. “That’s my girl, let it all out,” he says. He can feel you clenching down on him, the feeling making his dick throb harder. “Always be my good girl, right baby?” He asks. And all you can do is nod, when he starts fucking you faster, almost like he’s grown feral. “It’s good that you know because I’m about to fuck you like you aren’t.” He pushes your knees to your chest, lifting your hips slightly so that he reaches the deepest parts of you. “Nngh, fuck!” He grunts.
“Ken! Oh fuck, fuck!” You squeeze your eyes shut, the bed rocking and creaking with each other his hard thrusts. A hand clasps over your mouth in a weak attempt to muffle your screams of pleasure.
“Pussy feels so good, sweetheart. Can’t get enough—fuck—I’m sorry,” he heavily pants. Strands of blonde hair cling to his forehead, eyes fixated on watching his dick disappears in and out of you, your pussy creaming around him, leaving a white ring around the base. He can feel you clenching down on him again, your nails leaving crescent marks in his forearms as you’re cumming for a third time tonight, barely able to form words. “Atta girl. Look so pretty cumming on my cock,” he smirks.
Your back arches into him, legs quivering as he thrusts grow sloppier and sloppier. “Nnngh, shit,” he moans. “Gonna make me cum—ah!” His brows furrow as he fucks you harder, a primal feeling rises in him as he thinks of cumming inside of you for the first time ever. “Baby,” he says with desperation, “baby, let me cum inside you.” A rosy red spreads across his cheeks as he stares into your eyes.
Your arms reach out to him, dragging him down for kiss, legs locking around his waist as you push him closer to you. Nanami groans into the kiss and you swallow every last one as his seed fills you up, coating your walls. He slowly fucks you, making sure to get every last drop of his cum in you before pulling out.
“Oh my god, sweetheart,” he chuckles, a glint in his eyes. You laugh with him before he rolls both of you over, you now on top of him. He caresses your cheek and you melt into his hand, a blissful sigh leaving your lips. “You did absolutely amazing.” He smiles. “You doing okay, though?” He wonders, fingertips tracing patters on the small of your back.
“Yeah,” you nod, closing your eyes shut, “I’m doing great actually.” You smile. You rest your head on his chest. “Thank you, Ken.”
“No, thank you. I’m glad that you trusted me to be your first, honestly. It means a lot to me.” He kisses the crown of your head. “You’ll always be my girl.” He continues tracing your skin.
“Really?” You ask, lifting your head to look at him. “Promise me?” You pout, batting your lashes.
“I promise.” A smile tugs at the corner of his lips, his thumb rubbing over your bottom lips before you press a kiss to it. He chuckles at the small gesture. “Let’s get in the shower, together, yeah? Maybe order some food? You deserve it.”
#—☆classyrbf#anime#anime smut#jujustu kaisen#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk smut#nanami x reader#nanami smut#nanami x reader smut#nanami kento x reader#nanami kento x reader smut#nanami oneshot#nanami kento smut#jjk x reader smut#jjk oneshot#nanami x you#nanami x y/n#jjk nanami#nanami kento
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