#any of you are welcome to apply again! ... except for the person who knows they are not welcome back :)

[flamestv]

 𝙐𝙉𝙁𝙊𝙇𝙇𝙊𝙒,       due   to   inactivity,   admin   removal,   or   player   request,   please   unfollow   these   accounts.

@empyrevls

@crowndecay

@playgod-s

@2burn

@demergats

@divineriqht

𝙍𝙀𝙊𝙋𝙀𝙉𝙀𝘿,       the   following   roles   and   faceclaims   have   been   reopened   for   applications.

prince/ss   29+   targaryen,   emma   d'arcy

prince/ss   28+   targaryen,   drew   starkey

prince/ss   26+   targaryen,   madelyn   cline

ruling   lady   mallister   +   bruna   marquezine

ruling   lady   tyrell   née   rowan   +   kylie   verzosa

prince/ss   33+   martell,   aditi   rao   hydari

liege   33+   velaryon,   regé   -   jean   page

liege   21+   stark,   isabela   merced

lady   stark   née   tully,   jessica   chastain

lady   27+   lannister,   emily   bader

ruling   lady   greyjoy,   ayça   ayşin   turan

𝙒𝘼𝙍𝙉𝙄𝙉𝙂,       the   following   have   24   hours   to   post   in   character   or   message   the   main   before   their   roles   are   reopened.

@notredamcs,       elaena   targaryen

@weepingwxman,       quentyn   martell

@sacrifeis,       edric   baratheon

[pathologicalreid]

hello my new favorite tumblr writer 😇 i will b honest i have never requested anything before so!! bear with me. however the spencer reid brainrot is all too real SO would you be open to doing anything with a hotchner!fem!reader? bau or not for the reader! something something hotch is very hesitant about their relationship but maybe reader gets caught in the crossfire of something and hotch and prentiss see them together afterward and prentiss is like “that looks pretty real to me.” DOES THAT MAKE ANY SENSE OKAY I’M LEAVING NOW THANK YOUUUU 🫡

a father's daughter | S.R.

in which your father doesn't approve of your relationship, but who knows how he'll react when reid jumps into action after a threat against your life

who? spencer reid x hotchner!fem!bau!reader category: angst content warnings: general cm violence, blood, stitches, hospitals, medical inaccuracy word count: 2.03k a/n: anon you are legendary. this is an incredible request and i am so honored to be your new favorite tumblr writer! i am an absolute sucker for anything hotchner!reader (or rossi!reader) so i absolutely ate this request up! (also if anyone wanted to drop a request in my inbox... it would be welcome)

Aaron Hotchner was the most professional person in the BAU, except when it came to you. You, like him, had gone to law school. You were a public defender for just a short time before being put into WITSEC, and when your mother died, you applied to the FBI Academy.

Plain and short, it was nepotism, but no one was going to argue with the man whose wife was murdered by a serial killer. Your dad wanted you in the BAU so he could keep an eye on you, and there was nothing Erin Strauss could do about it. What your father couldn’t control, was your relationship with Reid.

He could tell you that he didn’t approve, but so long as David Rossi, king of inter-bureau mingling, was around, he couldn’t actually do anything to stop you. “I’m just saying that I’ve never seen Reid be consistent with a relationship,” your dad said, having pulled you away from the team to, once again, try to warn you off of your relationship.

“He’s been pretty consistent for the last seven months,” you responded, rifling through the victims' files that were in your arms.

You started to make your way out of the empty office when your father spoke again, “And he’s too old for you.”

Stopping in your tracks, you pivoted and faced your father, “He’s three years older than I am, I’m twenty-six. That’s hardly an age gap to bat an eye at.” The two of you had always had a rocky relationship, he missed a large portion of your childhood due to this job and you always tried to not resent him for it.

Your parents’ marriage fell apart, neither of them handled it well, and you weren’t all that surprised. They had gotten married when your mom got pregnant with you because they thought that was what they were supposed to do, and when Jack couldn’t keep them together, everything fell apart.

“You have no right to lecture me on relationships, Agent Hotchner,” you snapped, staring him down. Daring him to challenge you.

He sighed, obviously trying not to lose his patience with you. “I’d just hate for you to find out you wasted your time on something that wasn’t real.”

The door behind you swung open, you spun on your heels to face Emily. “Sorry, uh, we have a location, Morgan’s coordinating with SWAT,” she said, looking between you and your father.

“Great, let’s go,” your father said, his parental demeanor falling away as his Unit Chief mask took its place.

You walked out the door to see the rest of the team, Rossi tossed you a Kevlar vest as you walked over to where Spencer was standing with the police chief, “Where are we headed?” You asked, undoing the Velcro on the vest and pulling it over your torso. The beige precinct was buzzing as agents and officers prepared to break into the UnSub’s home base. Hopefully to find his most recent victim still alive.

Reid reached over and adjusted the strap of your vest, making sure it was evenly tightened over your shoulders. “Garcia found a warehouse on the other side of town. It’s being rented out under an anagram of the first victim’s name,” he said, gently squeezing your arm before dropping his hands back to his side.

Nodding, you followed the rest of the team out the metal doors of the precinct and into the black SUVs. “Your UnSub’s name is Jonas Watts, he used a different name to rent the space but the account he uses to pay for it is under his name,” Garcia’s voice rang through the speaker as she told you about the perpetrator. “He checks every UnSub box we have, raised by a single father after his mother left, and… oh, multiple arrests for assault.”

You looked up to the driver’s seat, your dad was white-knuckling the steering wheel, entirely focused on driving as you listened to Garcia reciting the UnSub’s rap sheet.

When you arrived at the warehouse SWAT was already there and Morgan started organizing the tactical assault. Drawing your weapon, you nodded at your teammate when he instructed you to go around the back with himself and your father. Allowing Morgan to kick the door down, the three of you held your firearms up and began clearing the warehouse.

Further away, you heard Emily and Spencer clearing the front. “Clear, moving up,” you called into your radio as you approached the stairs, stepping on them carefully so they didn’t creak. On the landing, you looked at a trail of blood on the ground. “There’s a blood trail in the upper west wing,” you whispered.

“Move up, little Hotch, I’m right behind you,” Morgan responded.

Rolling your eyes at the nickname, one that you had begged him to stop using, you moved forward, keeping your firearm aimed right in front of you. Turning into the room that the blood trail led to, you immediately ducked when you saw a knife coming for you. Keeping your gun aimed, you faced down the UnSub, “Jonas Watts, FBI!” You announced yourself, scanning the room for the girl he took last night.

Watts shook his head, “You’re not supposed to be here! You can’t be here!” He shouted in distress.

“Where’s the girl, Jonas? Where did you take Isobel?” You asked him, not seeing her in the room the two of you were in. There was another entrance on the left of him.

He stepped toward you, and you cocked your gun, “I don’t have her now. I lost her, she’s lost,” he said, there was a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

Unnerved, you decided to take a leap of faith, “Jonas, where’s your partner?” A partner hadn’t been part of the profile, but the more you thought about it, the more it made sense. The crimes were too complex, it didn’t match up with something as simple as using an anagram of a victim’s name for the warehouse rental.

Morgan filed in behind you, aiming his gun at Jonas, same as you. “Time’s running out, Jonas. If you tell us about your partner we can help you,” he said, slowly inching toward Watts.

“It’s too late,” Jonas wailed.

Someone knocked into you from behind, causing you to stumble forward before you were pulled to your feet. One arm was locked around your torso, and another was holding a knife to your throat. “If you don’t leave now, I’ll cut her fucking throat!” The unnamed man said from behind you, he was almost impossibly tall, easily overpowering you.

You didn’t dare move, not with that knife to your throat, one false move and you’d bleed out. Morgan shouted for him to let you go, but he just pressed the knife tighter to your neck, splitting the skin.

Shutting your eyes, you tried not to cry, fearing the damage it would do to your throat.

Your captor held you tightly to him, using your body to block Morgan from shooting. Something warm trickled down your collarbone, and you weren’t sure if it was blood or tears.

For a moment, you thought you could swing your foot back into his knee, but the fear of having your carotid cut outweighed your bravery.

Ever since you were a kid, you thought death would be quiet. Something you slipped into like sleep, but your death was loud, and it left your ears ringing.

The afterlife was the weirdest place you’ve ever been, someone was calling your name, and you heard your rights being read. Although, why you would need your Miranda Rights in the afterlife you had no idea.

“Angel, please open your eyes,” someone said.

Confused, you opened your eyes and saw familiar eyes staring down at you. Golden and bleary. Spencer, Spencer was here. You tried to sit up, but he held you down, keeping a hand on your throat.

Morgan was shouting for medical, saying there was an agent down. You turned your head to see the still unidentified UnSub on the ground, shot through the temple. Using his free hand to turn your chin, “Don’t look,” Spencer whispered. “You’re okay, I’ve got you. I’m not going to let anything happen to you, angel.”

If you weren’t still coming down from an adrenaline high, you might’ve smiled at the irony of the nickname. Being called ‘angel’ after having your neck cut felt like tempting fate.

Where was your dad? Of everyone here, you expected him to be here, barking orders at people.

As if summoned by your thoughts, your dad appeared, nearly hauling an EMT behind him, “Help her,” he said.

Yeah, that absolutely tracked.

The EMT’s packed your wound and assured everyone that your carotid had not been slit, against your protests, the ambulance brought you to the hospital for stitches. Emily had run to the hotel to get your go bag, allowing you to change out of your bloodied clothes.

Thankfully, the doctors said you didn’t need to stay overnight, meaning you and the team got to go home. “How are you feeling?” Spencer asked while you were waiting to board the jet.

You hummed, pulling your sunglasses over your eyes, and leaning against a car, “Tired, but I’m alright.” Tired might have been underselling it, you felt like all of the energy had been physically drained from your body. “You worry too much,” you whispered, closing your eyes for just a moment. Your throat was a little raspy, but it should go back to normal after a couple of days.

“Your throat was cut about four hours ago, some might say I’m not worrying enough,” he responded, reaching down, and picking up your bag, carrying it over to the jet once they got the okay to board. On the jet, he gestured to the seat, “Lay down, get some rest.”

You furrowed your brows, “Isn’t it kind of frowned upon to take up a whole seat?” You asked, of course, sometimes it happened, but you didn’t want to take up too much space.

Spencer cocked his head at you, “I don’t think anyone is going to fight you on it, love.”

Taking a deep breath, you sat down on the seat, laying down and closing your eyes, falling asleep before you even left the tarmac.

Being the Unit Chief had its perks, surely, but the piles of paperwork sometimes felt never-ending. Aaron took a deep breath before he closed the file, Rossi sat across from him, nursing a glass of whiskey.

“Hey,” Prentiss whispered, taking the seat next to him and setting her glass of water down on the small table. “Do you see that?” She said, gesturing with her head toward where you were lying down, asleep.

Right next to you was Reid, who usually had his nose buried in a book at this point in a flight, but he was wide awake, and all of his focus seemed to be on you. Begrudgingly, Hotch watched as Spencer reached over and tucked a blanket around you as if he was afraid you’d freeze on the temperature-controlled jet. “What about it?” Hotch asked, reaching over for the next file.

His eyes flicked up again, Spencer was sitting on the floor of the jet. Everyone had elected to leave the couch seats for the two of you, but the one across the aisle from you was empty. Like Reid didn’t even want you to be any more than one foot away from him.

Leaning back in the chair, Emily shook her head, “That’s what we in the business call hypervigilance.”

Hotch didn’t respond, he just spared another glance over at the two of you. “’We in the business’?” He inquired, humoring Prentiss.

“I’m just saying… the hovering? The blanket? I don’t know about you, but that looks pretty real to me,” she said, leaning back in the leather seat.

Silently, he glared, it would seem his hopes of getting the team to stop eavesdropping on familial conversations were quashed.

“Just let the kids be, Aaron,” Rossi said, grinning into his glass.

He cleared his throat and flipped open the new file before he acquiesced, “Fine, for now.”

please reblog, like, and/or comment if you enjoyed 🩵

[osmanthus-wine-addiction]

02 Jealousy

Zhongli x Reader / SFW but suggestive at the end / Mentions of Childe / Set at the beginning of the Liyue archon quest / Reader is unaware that Zhongli is the Geo Archon

"My dear, is something on your mind?"

Perceptive as he was, Zhongli couldn't figure out what it was that was upsetting you. That pout on your lips had been plastered there for a while now and as many times as he had questioned you if anything was bothering you, you simply brushed it off.

"I'm fine." You were, or so you thought you should be.

Zhongli was a bit of an attention magnet, which was not surprising with the meticulous way he dressed, his exceptional knowledge, and the way he carried himself. He delighted in it, smiling and going about his day as if he were simply soaking in sunlight. You often found the consultant lost in long-winded conversations with random people on the streets. While you found the person's advances a bit pushy, Zhongli didn't seem to think much of it.

Suspicions prickled underneath your skin when Zhongli mentioned that the individual had paid him yet another visit at the funeral parlor, this time insisting on taking him out to dinner. Zhongli was certainly not giving the eyesore any reason to stop encroaching by entertaining their whims. There was definitely something going on between them, outside of whatever business dealings the funeral parlor had with the Fatui. The more you thought about it, the surer you became.

Zhongli could tell something was amiss with you. Perhaps you were worried for him, maybe even a little bit possessive of him. It was a silly sentiment to have when he was so devoted to you.

"Darling, please tell me what is bothering you. It worries me that it may be my doing." He asks yet again one afternoon.

The way he tenderly gazes at you should assure you enough that there was no space in his heart for another person. Every time he calls you his dear, his sweetheart, or darling, you can hear the sincerity spilling over in his voice. It'd be cruel of you to keep him guessing, wouldn't it?

"You know that pair of chopsticks you got Childe when he arrived in Liyue? The dragon and phoenix one..." You brought up something that seemed irrelevant save for the person mentioned.

"Oh, yes. I remember them well. Their craftsmanship was quite exceptional." His eyes lit up the way they always did when he speaks about a particularly striking find he happens upon during his strolls through the city. "I gifted them to him as a gesture of welcome since he was learning to use them."

"I think he misunderstood your intentions."

Being the most learned person in Liyue regarding its traditions and customs, Zhongli didn't need to be reminded exactly what kind of intentions you were alluding to. The consultant's brows immediately furrowed in contemplation.

"While I do see how such a gift could be interpreted in other ways, I am certain that they don't apply to our particular circumstances."

"You gave him something that lovers give each other to pledge their love! Aren't you going to explain yourself?" You pouted, crossing your arms.

The consultant gave you an aggrieved yet amused look. "Traditionally, the dragon and phoenix symbolizes harmony and prosperity, something both Liyue and Snezhnaya hopes to achieve through steady trade. While it's most commonly given between couples, it may also be given to a friend or business partner to convey longevity."

Zhongli's reasoning was sound, however you refused to be convinced. You shook your head in frustration. "Don't you see? He's coming onto you too strongly for someone who just wants a diplomatic relationship!"

You couldn't just outright tell him to keep his distance from the Fatui harbinger since they were business acquaintances. Liyue harbor has its fair share of flirtatious people, the shopkeeper at Scent of Spring for one, but there was just something about the redhead in particular that unsettled you. The way Zhongli unabashedly spends his money also left much for you to think about. It wasn't all that different from the way Director Hu allowed him to leave tabs under the funeral parlor's name, but he wasn't as close to the Fatui harbinger as he was with Hutao. There was just something off about the dynamic between Childe and Zhongli. It didn't sit well with you at all.

"Either he has a thing for you or he's up to something. I'm sure of it."

The consultant stifled a chuckle. He was beginning to piece together the reason for your strange behavior lately. "Dear, I assure you that he is not interested in me in that way. Even if he were, I only have eyes for you."

"So you're just going to let him keep chasing you?" You frowned. "You know, I can spoil you too."

"Hm.... Where is this competitiveness of yours coming from?" Zhongli mused.

"Isn't that why you're giving him so much of your time? Because he's opening his wallet for you?" You pointed out. That redhead was hogging too much of your lover's time. You wanted it back.

"The Fatui have agreed to pay for Rex Lapis's Rite of Parting. I've been given a considerable sum to purchase all the necessities for the rites and to cover any expenses arising from the preparations, with the remaining funds to keep. So yes, if you must put it that way, he is indeed giving me his wallet to spend as I please."

"I might not be the Northland Bank, but I can buy you nice things too."

"I'm sure you can, my sweet." Zhongli stroked your cheek, distracting you momentarily. "I may only be a mere funeral consultant, but I too find it rewarding to spoil the one I treasure in pleasantries. If the Northland Bank wishes to further subsidize my spending, I shall not decline if it will allow me to do so."

"I don't know if I like the idea of my lover having a sugar daddy." You tried to keep a straight face as you said this.

"A sugar... daddy?" Zhongli's brow went up again. He understood the two words but put together, they obviously meant something he was not yet exposed to.

"A sponsor, but you have to entertain them romantically."

"I have no intentions of entertaining anyone but you in that sense." Zhongli chuckled as leaned in close, breath tickling your skin.

You begrudgingly accepted his kiss and his carefully placed touches.

"I want a pair too." You panted when his lips finally parted from yours.

"Very well. I will pay the shop a visit tomorrow morning to ensure a new pair of chopsticks will be made ready in time for your birthday. I will make a reservation at the Liuli Pavillion as well. If there is anything else I need to do to put your frustrations behind you, pray tell. I cannot stand that constant pout on your face." Zhongli grumbled, but it only made you giggle uncontrollably with the way he was nuzzling your neck while he spoke.

"Spoil me good tonight and maybe I'll consider letting you off the hook." You challenged.

"You test me."

Zhongli hummed in satisfaction, wasting no time in scooping you up in his arms and whisking you away to your bedroom amidst your feigned protests. If anything good came out of your pouting, it was his willingness to please. The consultant was on his knees, doing everything in his power to get back in your good graces.

[novasolstarr]

Hello and Welcome to NovaSolStarr’s blog!

Come in come in, take a seat!! I don’t bite here {:

Welcome to my blog! Apologies for this lengthy post but I just wanna get down a few rules and regulations here before you venture any further friend!

This is not a required read but it may provide some helpful insight to you {;

Let’s get it started

INTRODUCTION

My name is NovaSolStarr, feel free to call me Nova or Dusty!

I go by They / Them and It / It’s but feel free to also use bun / buns and fae / fier {:

I’m a digital artist and traditional doodler, you’re gonna see a mixed batch of content from me!

My fandom interests vary greatly and you’re likely to see some jarring switch ups to say the least

I do primarily Fandom and personal OC content, but you are likely to see other things!

Art Trades are 🔒Closed to the public, friends can ask but I am busy

Commissions are 🔒Closed

Art request are 🔐Tentative, see more in “Ask Rules”

‼️ACCOUNT WARNINGS‼️

I make a variety of content, though all SFW please know that I may also;

Make fairly suggestive content

Curse a lot, I mean a lot [I promise I’m not an aggressive user

Make blood and gore related content

Make some horror related content

May touch on more sensitive topics [Drugs, Abuse, Alcohol, etc.]

I usually try to censor that which needs it but sometimes I forget to properly tag things, please be aware of this!!

This is a VERY important section and I want you all to listen!!

Please be kind and respectful here

I try to keep my space drama free, and yes this will apply to real world happenings as well. I’m sorry if this disappoints anyone but I want to keep things stress free here.

So if you have drama please take it somewhere else, maybe to an account that’s more attuned for that, this is not the space and will result in a block.

Also please do not be weird towards me, I have a wife, I love my wife, @cyanide-cafe you are my silliest :3

This is a safe space for most people, although there’s exceptions, which leads me to

Let’s get things cleared up right now

IF YOU APPLY UNDER ANY OF THESE, PLEASE UNFOLLOW ME or better yet block me

I welcome most anyone regardless of ethnicity, region, religion, political views, or whatever, however I will NOT tolerate;

Bigots of any form or fashion

Transphobia, Homophobia, LGBTQA+phobia in general

Racism

Body shaming of ANY kinda

Misogyny

Zoophiles

Pedophiles

Proshippers [People who romanticizes problematic or harmful things]

If more needs to be added I will, but so long as you are not one of these people I don’t care.

I had a smaller post related to this but I’ll go ahead and squeeze it into here as well!

My ask blog is completely open for any and all!! With that though here’s some rules to keep it fun for everyone!

Do Not post anything NSFW or explicit in there, this will result in a block

Do Not be asking personal information questions or otherwise potentially harmful things

Do Not be spamming it unnecessarily, I’m fine with lots of questions in one go but if you’re spamming the same thing or generally the same thing over and over I’m not gonna be happy

Do Not put anything hateful or cruel, again this will result in a block, I don’t put up with that shit and I will not feed it

Now we have that covered, let’s talk about what IS okay and what is acceptable {:

Questions related to OCs or AUs of canon characters, I have a lot of fun with it [:

Art requests between OCs and Canon, although I might use my own design for this so be warned! This interaction could be familiar, an introduction, angsty, shipping or whatever! So long as it’s SFW I don’t mind

Art requests of canon characters! Always happy to give new characters a spin

Questions related to me or any comments you might have, do note I might not always respond to comments cause sometimes I just..dunno how to outside of “WAAH THANK YOU {: >”

And that about wraps it all up!

That’s all I have for today! Please just be kind, respectful, and over all have fun here!! I like having a space for people to enjoy and have fun with {:

[inkedreverie]

Hello, I'm back with another writing challenge. Since spooky season and my birthday are a few months away, I thought I'd host another writing challenge. This time with a much longer due date. Let's jump into it, shall we?

#𝐃𝐮𝐬𝐤𝐓𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐃𝐚𝐰𝐧𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞

This theme is inspired by my love for dark fics and anything spooky/scary/surpernatural, you name it! I want this challenge to be versatile. That means your fic can contain angst, can take place in a dark/spooky setting. The choice is yours.

𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 & 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐨;

-The prompts below will be sexual/dark so, all participants must be 18+

-All tropes and kinks are welcome except for underage/incest

-This challenge is open to dark fic writers/non dark fic writers

- Any of Sebastian Stan, cevan's characters, marvel/ or stranger things characters are welcome. I'm open to other fandoms/characters as well. Just let me know. All I ask is that there are no RPFS.

-Reader inserts only. But any type of reader is welcome. GN!, Plus Size, POC, etc.

-No word limits but I ask that if your piece is longer than 500 words, please leave a read more.

-Tag all warnings/kinks appropriately.

-You can start whenever you wish. The deadline isn't until September 28th, so that should give you plenty of time.

-You can mix and match the prompts or use just one of them. More than one person can use the same prompt if you wish.

-Please tag your fics with #DuskTillDawnChallenge and @ me so I can see your work.

-Last but not least, feel free to message or dm me with any further questions!

Tropes/Kinks:

Stalking/Stalker

Enemies to Lovers

Kidnapping

A/B/O

Forced Intimacy

Basement Wife

Hunt/Chase

Blackmail

Knife

Blood

Dry Humping

Dom/Sub

Bondage

Breeding

AU's

Werewolf AU

Vampire AU

Demon/Angel AU

Demon/Human AU

Forced Marriage AU

Post-apocalyptic AU

Haunted House/ Castle AU

Serial Killer AU

Horror AU

Prompts:

Horror/Angst:

"Don’t look at them, why are you looking at them? Look at me. they’re not going to help you."

"You see, I had quite a reputation as the go-to guy. My job demanded it at the time. So I know where to apply the tiniest amount of pressure to a wound like yours."

"No one is coming for you. I made sure of that."

"You look so good like this, all tied up and bloodied."

"You couldn't live with your own failure, and where did that bring you? Yeah, right back to me."

"It should have been you." "I know"

“All you are is a liar...” “My love for you is not a lie.”

"Don't trust people like me. I will hurt you in the most beautiful and intoxicating ways so that you can never go back to your normal life without my ghost following you."

"Oh, I’m not going to rush this. I’m going to take my sweet time."

Dark/Smut:

“Please, I have to get home.”

“Come out, come out, wherever you are.”

“I told you to shut up and you know I don’t repeat myself.”

“You’re scaring me.” “Good.”

“I didn’t follow you, you led me here.”

“How did you get in here?”

“They’re going to start looking for me.”

“You can bite me. I like it.”

“I’ve done so much for you, don’t you think you owe me?”

“You want to do that again… you want me to hurt you.”

“Take off your clothes. Slowly. I want to watch you.”

"Do not scream god's name, scream mine."

“Louder, I want to hear you!”

“I can’t sleep if I’m not inside you.”

“I don’t care who hears, I want everyone to hear what I do to you.”

“You want me to pull out, ask me nice and I’ll cum in your mouth.”

“I wanna fuck you right against the glass so everyone can see how good you take it.”

"I get so hard when I’m around you."

tagging some mutuals who might be interested! no pressure. @thornsnvultures, @brandycranby, @nickfowlerrr, @mickeyhenrys

[c9kefestation]

Any hcs you have? Any club penguin character this time!

Good morning gang (even thought it's noon as of posting this), welcome to episode 2 of ramblingfestation! I'm your host, G Billy, and im your co-host, G Billy-

I mentioned this like a while back but my hcs outside of the pb are kinda lacking i think so I'm sorry if this isn't going to be as juicy as the previous hc dump.

Here goes!:

Aunt Arctic has 2 sisters! with her being the middle child.

Sam/Shadow Guy is colorblind, specifically, he has protanopia (literally JUST searched up the term), it means that he can see only shades of blue and yellow (can't perceive the color red).

Not much of a hc but it might be fun to know, in my design for Shadow Guy, if you look closely, you'll see that one of his pupils is whited-out (just an outline). This, and the poof of spiky feathers he has on his head are a nod to him getting zapped by the toaster that gave him his powers (quick note: my clubp lore knowledge doesn't go very far, just fyi)

I've already stated this hc before but I might aswell also mention it here, Amy/Gamma Gal is a cane user! Never stops her from kicking ass though!

This one has something to do ab my design for the character again: Agent(PR) uses hair gel to style the feathers on their head. They try to make them as neat and cool-agent-looking as possible, but they always end up looking silly and dopey. Same applies to Agent in the normal club penguin universe, but they're more successful in their attempts. Ig that's how I differentiate them,personality wise, PR Agent ends up more towards the silly side while ClubP Agent ends up on a lil more towards the serious-ish one, if that makes any sense.

Idk much about Dj Maxx but I roll with the idea that he's a ghost. He and Dj Cadence are roommates (no, you may NOT quote the vine)! Though Cadence is the only one who leaves the igloo, Maxx just kinda chills in there. No one knows about his existence there except for Cadence, the PB and maybe other ghosts like Skip.

Speaking of Skip the Bellhop, bro HATES the sunlight. Whenever he hangs out with Jeff (SKEFF IS REAAAAL) during the summer, he has like a victorian ass umbrella with him to protect himself, aswell as some fancy ass shades (dracula fuckin ass).

The Penguin Band all live in the same igloo (you may now quote the vine)!

I was going to save this for a possible future post but Stompin' Bob has a lotta siblings. 1 older sister and 2 younger twins (boy and girl).

I think that's going to be it for today, I don't wanna overdo myself and explode cuz I've never rlly rambled like this online.

Hope u guys liked it!

[utilitycaster]

You commented on not being a fan of non-pc pov scenes in ap, something that Aabria used in the first go of exu (which was one of the main things that put me off of it, tbh). Do you have any thoughts on how this is applied in EXU compared to WBN?

So for EXU there's some parts that are better, and some that are worse. The good thing is that they're very brief snapshots vs. the one in WBN that was like, an extended several-minute scene. I also actually kind of like the ones for Ted, since that makes sense; we know it's impossible to really get Ted's perspective otherwise and you can kind of handwave it as being related to Opal and floating about in her unconscious.

The ones for My'ratta and Poska on the other hand, while again, brief, sort of underscore their lack of development. We did not know what Myr'atta wanted until episode 93 of Campaign 3, and as I've said before I literally could not tell you what the goal of the Nameless Ones or Poska is. They serve no purpose narratively except as a ticking clock and shadowy threat to get the Crown Keepers to leave a place quickly.

I mentioned Otohan in my original post on this topic as an example of an underdeveloped antagonist, something Brennan mentioned as something he hoped to avoid, and Myr'atta, Poska, and Otohan are all ultimately cut from the same cloth: cool aesthetic, cool abilities, and a severe lack of in-game development. I don't know what motivates them (or in Myr'atta's case, didn't while they were an ongoing part of the story) and so they all bore me. They are flat, dull villains who say threatening shit that means nothing because I don't know what drives them. I don't want to keep getting into it because it kind of derailed my original point anyway but what frustrates me the most is how people keep saying "oh but I'm sure they have a motivation." Like yeah bitch. I'm sure they do. The GM has a responsibility to convey that in-game. And they can do so subtly! Believe me, I am glad to do the work of unpicking motivation from allusions or what is carefully unsaid; this is what makes Ludinus and Liliana (and Lolth in EXU) interesting! But it's telling that whenever I'm like "what the fuck does this character do other than serve the purpose of a Plot Device to either threaten or move the characters", no one ever like, explains their motivation to me; it's always "give it time! I'm sure the GM has something in mind." Well, both Myr'atta and Otohan died before we got that (we still don't have it for Otohan) so I think we can safely say the waiting game is for suckers. Like, if you like characters based on aesthetic alone that's valid as a choice, but I'm not taking your meta or arguments seriously because that's a superficial judgment.

It's also frustrating because it's like...the GMs and the fans who keep insisting to be PATIENT long after a boring antagonist has worn out their welcome for me are simultaneously like "the audience will not remember this guy if I don't shove them in their face in a stilted cutscene" and also "clearly, the audience will infer that this boring-ass antagonist MUST have something deeper going on and therefore they will extend credit indefinitely." It's the absolute opposite of what they should be prioritizing. Instead of trying to jingle the antagonist in front of me like keys while still doing nothing to develop their personality, maybe have the party...idk, have a vision. find a letter. learn something secondhand from someone talking in a bar that sheds light on their motivation.

In WBN it's actually a totally different problem. The scene is 100% unnecessary. We know what the Man in Black wants. We know what's going on with him. We know his goals and his allies. We saw him only a couple episodes ago and he's been a topic of discussion throughout a good chunk of the arc. Hell, we even know how dope-ass his aesthetic is. This is just showing something the party doesn't know and can't act on, for several minutes of Brennan talking to himself, and I think it actually destroys what would be a gut-punch of undead Sir Curran showing up on the opposite side of Eursulon, whose entire deal is being inspired by him.

So: The EXU scenes are less intrusive for their brevity, the fact that the Ted ones are pretty good, and that at least they don't spoil a moment, but at the same time they still don't solve the problem of an underdeveloped antagonist for Myr'atta and Poska. The WBN scene meanwhile drags on, and actually does too much by taking what could be an unbelievably devastating reveal and having it happen when Eursulon isn't even there to respond. I couldn't tell if this actually spoiled it for Lou, since they record well in advance, but if it did that's such a missed opportunity.

Anyway I think my point is that (with the exception of the very first scene of a campaign that is setting the stage, before the PCs are introduced) these cutscenes only work if they are extremely short and purely for vague flavor. I think if you want to have a scene with no PCs present, you should perhaps write a book or a screenplay instead of playing D&D.

[blender2902]

IN DEFENCE OF QUEEN MARIKA PART 1: THE GUIDANCE OF GRACE-

Welcome to the first part of my Elden Ring lore series where I defend Queen Marika from slander. For the past 2 and a half years she has gotten a lot of unfair shit thrown at her, most of which she never did. With this series I hope to prove that Queen Marika loves Godfrey and all her kids excluding Radahn, Rykard(cuz they are Radagon’s not hers. I do think there is something going on between her and ranni tho.) and godrick( no one does tbf). But to do that I must first analyse the guidance of grace and then refute the many allegations thrown at her due to that. I will be using logic and evidence for most of my analysis, if I see a flaw with what I provide, I will say so. If I don’t feel free to point that out.

(Disclaimer: I am not trying to say that ‘Queen Marika did nothing wrong’ as that would be stupid and a massive disservice to the writing. What I am trying to do is portray Marika's complexity using evidence that I have seen no one else use and to clear her name of the crimes she did not commit. She is objectively a bad person just like every major character in the game but just like them she is complex, except her complexity is much higher than the rest in my humble opinion. Her complexity is far more than just ‘tragic past boo hoo’ and I want to show just that with this series.)

If you have any disagreements with my logic or you see that I have missed a piece of evidence then feel free to point that out. Either my delusions break or yours do and both are a win for me! Please present your arguments pointwise though as that will make arguing a lot easier.

DEBUNKING THE GUIDANCE OF GRACE ALLEGATIONS:-

The nature of grace is left pretty vague by the game. What matters to us is, what does it tell us about Marika? I have seen many people claim that Marika has complete control over grace hence she guides us to kill her kids in cold blood to fulfil her own selfish desires. There are several factual and logical problems with this argument. For the sake of this analysis, I will do 2 things 1) Go along with the perspective that Marika has complete control over grace and where it guides us. I will prove that if this is the case, then Marika’s motives simply can’t be selfish by using logic and evidence. 2) I will give an alternate interpretation of the nature of grace based on in-game evidence. What I want to prove is that Marika loves her kids, but besides maybe Ranni, she doesn’t love the Carian demigods since they are not her own children but Radagon’s. She doesn’t love Godrick either(no one does tbf again lol).   

1) Let’s go along with the narrative that Marika controls grace completely.

So the first question we must ask is why is she guiding us?

Well, the answer is clear, she wants Radagon and Elden beast to killed. Everyone can agree on that. Now, what is her motive for wanting them killed? I have seen some answers painting Marika as some Machiavellian Evil Mastermind, so let’s debunk them one by one-

She wanted to rule eternally even as a husk: Ok so, there are many holes in this answer that refute it.        

1) The biggest hole is that even after we inherit the frenzied flame, we still have the guidance of grace. If she wanted to rule eternally, why would she allow someone who inherited the frenzied flame, you know the thing that fucking destroys the entire fucking world all the way down to the fucking spirits. Why in the name of fuck would anyone who wants to selfishly rule eternally ever guide the dumbass who is willing to destroy the world including her. Her guiding the tarnished even after inheriting the frenzied flame alone refutes all claims of ‘Marika had a masterplan that after Radagon and Elden beast were killed she would blah blah blah’ but I am not done destroying this line of thinking just yet. Also, don’t even try to argue ‘Oh it’s a game Mechanic not lore accurate’ as that would also apply to grace itself so you are refuting your own argument.

2) If ruling for eternity was her goal then why did she shatter the Elden Ring? She had zero fucking threats to her rule. I have legit seen someone say that she felt threatened by Miquella as he was a prime candidate to replace. Now that argument is just plain dumb because 1) Miquella had to go to the shadow lands and do a whole bunch of fucked up bullshit to himself to even be able to ascend which he was able to do only because of Mohg and we know from Freja’s questline that Miquella was doing the stuff at Mohgwyn after the battle of Aeonia, so don’t tell me that Marika got scared as fucked of what Miquella was going to do and 2) even if Miquella had gone to the shadow land and had ascended what the fuck would he do without Radahn being there. All Marika would have to do in this fictional scenario is to keep Radahn alive which would be easy considering how strong he is. 3) She can just send Malekith to kill Miquella if she felt so threatened. The other empereans were Malenia (who is loyal to Miquella and shows no interest in becoming a god) and Ranni, who is literally fucking dead. Why would she take everything down when she has nothing to feel threatened with? The only other argument I have seen for this is that Radagon was usurping her so she wanted him gone, which has the major problem of - SHE WOULD BE IN THE SAME GODDAMN POSITION AT THE END OF THIS PLAN AS SHE WOULD BE IF SHE HADN’T DONE THIS EXCEPT, SHE WOULDN’T BE FUCKING CRUCIFIED. Like ok, so she did not want to be a tool of Radagon so she instead plans on becoming a tool for the tarnished? The latter is way worse than the former because 1) she is a fucking husk and at least in the former she wouldn’t have that pain and 2) Let’s face it, 90% of us are degenerates including me and our player character would reflect that, why would anyone want us to control them. Again, all of this is assuming she even had control during Radagon’s age and was all around malicious both of which I think is untrue (I will discuss this in another post in the future).

There is a lot more I could say to refute this answer but these two points should be more than enough.

She had a plan to ascend to a higher being somehow:

1) Again, the frenzied flame argument refutes this

2) So we are just assuming that she can ascend further even though zero things say that? Yeah. I think I am done with this answer.

So, what does she want from us? I believe that she only wants us to go kill the Radagon and Elden beast. Radagon is keeping the world in purgatory via his seal whether it be by his own will or the Elden beast’s depending on your interpretation so her wanting them to be killed is not really selfish especially considering that she would also die. Now at many points in the game the light of grace guides us. What does this tell us about Marika? Let’s take a deep look.

Here is the Elden Ring map with all graces active:

UNDERGROUND:

DLC:

Let’s analyse where grace guides us and prove that Marika’s motives for each case is born out of love (even if its morally complex) and is never selfish using simple logic. I am excepting Godrick and the Carian demigods (except maybe Ranni) as I believe she is apathetic towards them. We are going from hardest to explain to easiest to explain-

DLC: I have 2 explanations here.

1) I have seen many claim that Marika just wanted Miquella killed for some self-serving reason but this just logically cannot be true. Grace stays with us even after we inherit the frenzied flame which would destroy everything including Marika and reset the world so we can’t logically argue that she has any plans for her future. Therefore, the only sensible motive for her guiding us towards Miquella is to free him from godhood. Lets look specifically at where she is guiding us in the dlc:-

Something very interesting to note here is that she only starts guiding us if we rest at the divine beast arena. She never guides us in any other open world area other than ancient ruins of rauh. If her intent from the moment we entered was to kill Miquella then we would have been guided in gravesite plains or scadu altus but no, we get guided when we kill divine beast at which point she realises what Miquella has fallen into. This suggests that she does not want us here at all but after seeing that Miquella is going to fall in the same trap as her, she makes the choice to end his suffering before it begins, for she knew better than anyone how horrible of a fate godhood truly is. This does mean she guides us towards Messmer so we can get his kindling but I do think she is doing this out of love as well. Think about how Messmer is feeling after all these centuries. The last sign of he felt from his mom were her shattering the elden ring which was seen as a sign of wrath as per the wrath from afar description. He was suffering immensely too and seeing his mom as a crucified husk would have probably made his life worse than it already was, so bringing him peace and ending his pain would be much a better fate. Now Messmer will have his own post in the future as there is a lot of stuff about him that is unfortunately not brought up enough but that is beside the point. tldr Marika loved him but circumstances forced her to seal him in the shadow realm which happened very late in the timeline, like night of the black knives late. Again, I know this sounds kinda ridiculous to most of y’all but I will make a post with all the evidence in the future where we can discuss this. Her motives just logically cannot be self-serving because if it was then she would have stopped guiding us when we inherited the frenzied flame.

2)The grace at divine beast is simply pointing towards the entrance to enir ilim leading us towards a dead end. This could have been an attempt from Marika where she tried to tell us ‘hey ya can’t reach Miquella so let’s just get out of here!’ but she unintentionally points towards Messmer. When we kill Messmer she decides its best to free Miquella from his prison as well so she starts guiding us again. The fact that its only the divine beast grace that points towards Messmer and not a single other one does, supports this argument quite well.

Pick whichever explanation you want but logically her motives here have to have been born out of love and not some selfish shit because she has no problem guiding us when we inherit the frenzied flame. Me personally, the first explanation is quite sound with logic so I would pick that but there is plenty of merit with the second one. The thing going against the second explanation for me is that I just find it kinda silly that from would just have the grace point towards messmer but have it just be for enir ilim. Like important details like that being mistakes is just not it. Nonetheless the second interpretation is logically valid as we can see it as a desperate attempt from Marika trying to save her son but end up doing the opposite so feel free to think that way.

Caria Manor: Sorry for the low-quality pic-

So, Marika guides us towards caria manor which is where Ranni resides. Now I have heard some people say that she guides us here to get a great rune, but that cannot be true since Ranni is stated to have cast her great rune aside. Now something very interesting to note here, is that the site of grace that appears when you give Ranni the fingerslayer blade guides us towards Renna’s rise where we can continue her questline. This would mean Marika supports Ranni’s goals. Now I know you will say that I dug myself a grave because this ‘proves that Marika planned Godwyn’s murder’ but no my friend I did not. I will go in depth about the night of the black knives in the future but I will leave a few explanations here- 1) Marika supports Ranni’s goals even if she killed Godwyn. Marika very much holds resentment against Ranni for killing Godwyn but she realises that Ranni does have the right end goal so she is willing to have us help her. 2) Even in the scenario where Marika did help Ranni in stealing destined death, what says the goal was to kill Godwyn? Nothing, from what I can tell and motive wise, this falters a lot too. What could have been the end goal was for Ranni to steal the rune of death so that Marika could use that to kill herself but the assassins double crossed them. 3) Maybe Marika doesn’t even want us to help Ranni but kill her instead which would be really funny cuz most ER players ended up marrying her lol.

I will make a future post that will debunk the Godwyn allegations so I will ask that if any of you wish to refute this post, leave out this particular section.

Church of the plague: sorry again for low quality pic-

So why does Marika guide us towards church of the plague? Well, the simplest explanation is that she is not guiding us towards that church, but toward Radahn. If she was guiding us towards Millicent, we first have to assume that she even knows about her in the first place which is a bit of a stretch if you ask me. Now we can definitely argue that Marika is trying to use Millicent to get to Malenia as Millicent leads us towards castle sol. I will explain that is the next point about castle sol.

 Castle Sol: Sorry again for low quality pic

So, she guides us towards the secret medallion in castle sol. I have seen people say that ‘Marika wants us to kill Malenia so we can get her great rune but that makes zero fucking sense when you consider the fact that when you reach this point in the game, you do not need any more great runes. If she really wanted us to get all great runes then why does she not guide us towards Mohg in Mohgwyn palace?

Simple, she does not want us to kill Malenia nor Mohg. If try to argue by saying that ‘Oh she doesn’t know about Mohgs palace’ don’t, because my guy, she starts guiding us towards Ranni after she disappears from her tower and she immediately guides us towards Miquella after finding out what he is upto. She is shown many times to actively react to what is happening in the present so if we were to discover Mohgwyn and her motive was for us to take all great runes then she would immediately guide us towards Mohg the moment we touched a grace over there but no, she does not which refutes all claims of her wanting us to slay all her demigods. Now begs the question, what does she want from us getting the secret medallion? Well, we have a few answers- 1) This could be another Ranni situation where she thinks Miquella can succeed her properly and she wants us to help him out but she realises that it’s too late for him. 2) Gideons dialogue does seem to suggest that Marika knew that Miquella got kidnapped so maybe she hoped we could help him but we know what Miquella was up to. Again, like I have said multiple times before, this will require a post of its own but the point is that Marika’s motives here just can’t be selfish as all the logic and evidence says otherwise.

Leyndell and Morgott: Same thing as with Messmer, Morgott was defending the capital for a very long time which caused him a lot of suffering. Marika just wanted him to be at peace after everything. It is very, very important to mention that Godfrey was likely also being guided at around the same time as us which I will elaborate on late in this post.

Castle Morne: I guess she guides us here to get stronger cuz that is the only logical explanation.

The rest either guide us towards a  shardbearer who Marika does not really care much about.

Another very important point to mention in this discussion that supports my stance of Marika actually loving her kids- Vyke and Godfrey. Vyke was a tarnished guided by grace and is stated to have almost become elden lord but failed due to frenzied flame bullshit. Now he somehow got to the point of the forge of the giants without killing any of the demigods. This flat out tells us that Marika tried her best to help her kids live but her attempts were met with failure as seen with Vyke. But at the same time she guides us, she is also guiding Godfrey. Godfrey would definitely come to peaceful agreements with Morgott letting him live. This means that even after Vyke failed, Marika still tried her best to save her kids it seems. Unfortunately, we were just faster than Godfrey. In Godfrey’s cutscene, we see that his grace guides him towards us. Now what does this say to us? Let’s logically break it down. Is Marika trying to see which one of us is stronger so she gets the best chance to be freed? Well, this makes little sense logically speaking. Her goal is to be freed, so it’s best to have both Godfrey and the player kill Radagon and Elden Beast together instead of doing a dumb battle royale which might result in failure. Like at least send them one by one to weaken Radagon and Elden beast for the other. So logically Marika is not being calculated over here which means emotions are at play. The only way this makes sense is if Marika wants Godfrey specifically to come and rescue her. Looking at Godfreys cutscene and the Ashen Capital site of graces, I find it quite odd that Marika seemingly stops guiding us when we release destined death but then Godfrey is immediately guided towards us. This is, in my opinion, a very strong clue that Marika wants Godfrey over the tarnished.

Ok, done with the first perspective.

2)An alternate interpretation of grace-

So, if we go kill the final boss of the base game, we kill Radagon which in turn kills Marika also. Now if we go light a grace that gives guidance after this, it still gives us guidance. This does seem to suggest that grace works independently to Marika even though she is the one who gives it. Now the reasoning can definitely be chalked up to gameplay reasons but that can also be applied to every site of grace so that the argument goes both ways. There is another thing that suggests grace works independently to Marika-

The other tarnished called by grace seem to be following their own path that does not really lead to lordship. Fia, Dung eater and Goldmask seem to be doing things that don’t really lead to them becoming Elden Lord.

This suggests that grace does not necessarily guide all the tarnished to become elden lord but instead towards their ambition. This seems to check out with everyone- the player and aspiring lord, Godfrey wanting his wife back, Fia doing shit with Godwyn, Dung eater eating shit and Goldmask moving his fingers. There is a distinct possibility that Marika does not have complete control over grace at all. Now having said all this, we can explain the behaviour of all the tarnished using logic but I don’t think that is necessary for what I am trying to prove.

Conclusion:

If you have read this post thoroughly, you should either agree with what I am saying about Marika’s motivations or concluded that the nature of grace is left too vague to come at any solid conclusions. Either option is good enough for me. Like I said earlier, if you disagree I am more than happy to discuss with you, when I get the time(life has been quite busy for me the past month🥲). The point of my blog is to create an environment where we can have proper discussions about the lore whilst being friendly. We can disagree without having to tear each other's throats out.

I have some more work to do irl so it will take some time before I post again or reply to anyone so I just wanted to post. Once my irld work is done I will become a lot more active here. Have a great rest of your life to all who see this post!

[atiny-piratequeen]

*cracks knuckles* Okay, here we go!

I am opening commissions for June/July!

Most of my usual Commission Rules apply, however, for this round, I will be accepting 3-4 at this time, and I will only be accepting full payments at this time. Please be aware these slots are for JUNE/JULY. If you are not okay with waiting for them to be posted, or pay in full for them, I don't think I will be able to accept them this time around.

Info under the cut

𝐏𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐞𝐬-(All Prices are in USD and payment will be collected either via Paypal or Kofi if PP is not available to the commissioner. Commissioners are responsible for conversions)

Timestamps/Drabbles (Below 1k): $5USD

1k-$10USD

2K-$20USD

3K-$30 USD

Etc…

꧁ Works over 5k will have an additional $5 dollars added onto the total and need to give me at least a month’s time to complete, works over 10k will be an additional $10

꧁ In the event that I cannot reach your desired minimum WC (i.e, i fall just short of 2k, etc), you’ll only have to pay up to the % of the wc I fell short of. (ex, if a comm is 2k but I reach 1.5k, the price would be $15 and the $5 will be refunded.) The same applies if I happen to write over how much you paid for, you do not have to pay for the extra words. 

꧁ All commissions from any of my personal series (for example, if you’d like to buy a commission for something in AtT’s Verse, Ataraxia Verse, or Night Shift’s verse), recieve a 10% discount (drabbles and timestamps excluded)

-Do note that any comms in established universes are n o n canon events and unless discussed/agreed upon by me, do not expect a comm to be canon in my series past the confines of said commission

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐖𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞

-Most Genres (Fluff, Romance, Angst, etc)

-Smut (Commissioner must be 18 or older, absolutely no exceptions. Ever)

-Crossover Fandom Ships (You can inquire in dms which other bands I stan and I’ll let you know if I know them well enough to write the work being commissioned)

-MxM Fics 

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-Etc (Please check the works I have posted across this account and my other accounts for a general idea of the content I have written before and feel comfortable writing)

-**New** Anime/Video Game Fics, as long as I am familiar with the source material

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐖𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞

-Underaged Smut (No underaged idols, no underaged reader scenerios, absolutely no nsfw smut commissions to be accepted at all. Anyone who even inquires about underaged smut will be promptly blocked :) )--In the event of Anime Reqs, all characters will be 18+ regardless of canon

-Rape/Dub-Con/ “CNC” 

-Yandere Works in any capacity

-Works with a biggoted message (homophobia, transphobia, racism)

-Incest (Yes this inculdes adopted and step siblings/families)

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐈𝐧𝐟𝐨

Anyone who’d like to commission me is welcome to inquire in my dms. Please keep your DMs open so we may maintain an easy two-way communication during the commission process. I am also open to using Discord as a means of communication.

 I will NOT be taking commissions through my ask box at all, if you are not comfortable with messaging me through dms or on discord, I will not be taking your comission. My ask boxes are not appropriate places to be exchanging payment information. 

Again, I do not accept nsfw commissions from minors (those under 18), please respect this and failure to do so will result in you being blocked. 

Once I talk with you on what you’d like to commission, I will send you my PayPal and I can begin as soon as I receive the payment.

Please allow two weeks minimum for commissions once the initial payment agreement is reached, as I also work outside of this and have other works to do alongside your commissioned work. 

Works 3k+ will require a minimum of 3 weeks to a month, and I will message you with updates along the way.

As the creator, I reserve the right to decline any commission request handed to me. Please be respectful in the event that I turn down your commission request, I am open to alterations to requests so that it may be more comfortable, but if I cannot write the work comfortably, it will be denied. 

All of these works, though commissioned, are still under my copyright, so reposting is absolutely not allowed. The works will be posted both here and ao3, but I still will not allow it to be reposted to other sites/accounts that are not my own

Works that are Ateez focused will be posted @atiny-piratequeen

Any non atz works will be on my multi blog @nocturne-overtures

Anime/Video Game works will be posted on @sin-hashira (Blog under construction)

Thank you so much for reading through. As per usual, reblogs are welcome always and I hope you all have a lovely day/night!

[maybeimamuppet]

Hey uh I need you to go more in depth about the "the characters know they're in a musical" thing because that is an insane take I've never heard about any musical in my entire life

hello i will do so and relish in it

okay to begin with this only applies to the stage production. both movies we are just watching what’s happening in real time imo. they have no idea wtf is going on look at them.

when the stage production opens damian has a whole little spiel like “good morning freshmen! welcome to high school!” and then cautionary tale happens and blah blah blah etc.

it’s also worth noting that. mean girls is objectively not a good musical. is it my favorite yes will i shank anyone outside the fandom who says this 100% BUT if you compare it to something like the prom with a similar setting/similar vague concept it’s really not. not great.

BUT i think this was kind of weirdly intentionally done.

again in the beginning during it roars and whatnot the animals that walk by are clearly just people in costumes and i think that’s also on purpose. the zebras have paintbrushes for manes for pete’s sake (like janis hello???)

SO i personally think that what we’re seeing is a musical that damian and janis co-wrote. i think damian did most of it and janis helped. she wrote i’d rather be me and things like that

i think it’s bad because it was written and produced by actual teenagers themselves. i am 100% convinced that they are seniors acting out the previous year as a sort of welcome to high school assembly for the incoming freshmen. mr. duvall said they could either do something creative to tell their story as an example of why Bullying Is Bad ™ or have detention for the entirety of the next year and they did this. the others have to act in it for the same reason and janis and damian just wanted to.

they’re acting as themselves and fully self aware the entire time. it feels like it’s happening in real time because it’s only been a few months since it did and the memories are fresh for all of them.

karen is the only one who breaks the fourth wall (except janis and damian at the top of the show and top of the second act) for GOOD REASON!! SHES DONE IT ALL BEFORE!!!!!

the reason janis and damian are the sort of narrators and the audience’s window into the show is because they’re the ones who are putting it on and producing it.

anyway in conclusion i fully believe they’re aware they’re in a musical and this is all happening like in their school gym or auditorium lmao

[m0ther-of-p3arl]

bad news on tv, black ink revives me

(robert aeor high au p2)

masterpost

hi and welcome to my mcyt high school au! if you haven't read part one, i highly suggest starting with that.

…Huh. That’s interesting. So there is a new student, and chances are, based on the chair seated ominously by his side, Scott has a class or two with him. He’s, annoyingly enough, slightly interested about this so-called “Timmy,” wonders what he looks like-

or Scott finds out there's a new kid at school, and can't stop thinking about who they might be.

TW: internalized homophobia, self hatred, anxiety, bullying

Robert Aeor High is an exceptional school, very upper-class, with most of the students living most of their lives in mansions, surrounded by everything they could ever need. Scott supposes he’s obliged to count himself in this number, though his friends, all mostly lower-class typical income people, say he’s nothing like them. But he has grown up in a mansion, and even his cold, sterile home is still a mansion.

Scott is by no means popular, in fact, quite the contrary. He tries as hard as he can to stay to the side of all the drama, to stay safe within his own little friend group, to stay hidden, to stay safe. Sometimes it’s hard to blend in, though, when someone’s singling you, specifically, out. Especially when that person is Xornoth.

Xornoth is that kid at school, the one everybody’s afraid of, the popular one, the one who has several henchmen that bend over to do zir bidding, the one who everyone seems to have a secret crush on. Ze’s a tiefling, like Owen, but where Owen is a prismatic tiefling, able to be born any color of the rainbow, from dusky blue to the pumpkin orange of Owen’s skin, Xornoth is a dark tiefling. Zir skin is a dark, almost glowing, purple, and zir massive, twisting goat horns at least three times bigger than the non threatening orange spikes that peek out from Owen’s hair.

Xornoth is one of the main reasons Scott’s begun to dread going to school almost as much as going home, especially now that their bullying’s extending to the level of legitimate harassment.

Xornoth seems to have a perverse obsession with touching Scott’s snakes.

A gorgon’s snakes are like an avian’s wings, or a tiefling’s horns, or a celestial’s tail: you simply don’t touch them. Xornoth’s way around this basic human decency, however, is that since Scott’s a hybrid, those rules just don’t apply to him. It’s never made much sense to Scott, as though he’s defective, he’s still a gorgon, still a person.

He has feelings, and that’s the one thing Xornoth seems to disregard the most.

“Scotty, come on, I just want to see how they feel,” ze purrs. Zir two henchmen, Joey and a boy who Scott only knows as “Sausage,” snicker under their breath, smirks ghosting across their faces.

“No, you can’t-” Scott begins, only to feel unwanted hands brushing roughly up against his snakes, the fingers calloused and groping. Scott shrinks away, disgusted. “What is wrong with you?! How would you like it if I touched your horns?”

“God, Major, what the hell? Why do they feel like ice?” Xornoth asks, completely disregarding Scott’s previous statement, reaching zir curious hand out towards his head again.

“One, my name is not Major. Two, you know why, you’ve known why since last year. Three, stop trying to touch my snakes. Now.” Scott’s slowly backing away, and he can feel himself beginning to shake. He hates unwanted touch, especially directed at his snakes, and he knows that if he doesn’t get away soon, he’ll have a full-on breakdown in the middle of the hallway. He’d never live it up then.

“Aww, he’s mad!” Xornoth snickers. “It’s just a question, Major. Be civil. Now, as much as I’d love to stay here and hang out with you all day-” Joey giggles under his breath, pushing his hand up to his mouth- “I’m afraid me and the boys have things to do. Arrivederci, Scotty Boy!” Xornoth waves cheekily, zir eyes cruel and calculating, knowing ze’s hit him in exactly the right spot.

Scott watches as ze sashays down the hall, one arm wrapped loosely around Joey’s shoulder as ze talks animatedly to Sausage, rude laughter cascading from the boy after Xornoth says something seemingly very funny, presumably about him.

He hates Xornoth almost as much as he hates himself. 

Walking into his homeroom, Scott immediately notices that there’s an extra desk in the back row, right next to where he sits, alone, the furthest away from everyone he can get. He’s always chosen to sit in the far back corner whenever he can, because the less attention Scott gets, from students and teachers, the better it is for him. So the fact that now, there seems to be someone who’s sitting next to him? It doesn’t bode well.

What if whoever’s desk this happens to be another Xornoth, bent on tormenting Scott and making his life hell?

But as the students trickle into homeroom, the extra desk isn’t claimed, and Scott lets out a mental sigh of relief. Maybe it’s just a mistake, just a simple misunderstanding. Maybe it’s for a new person in a different class, someone who doesn’t share Scott’s homeroom, but instead has this class for math or something. That sounds plausible, and if Scott’s honest with himself, he’s slightly disappointed. There’s always a possibility that any given new person will be attractive, and Scott is in dire need of a boyfriend.

The thought slips out before he can stop himself, and immediately, he starts to spiral.

No. No, no, no, nonononono- he’s not supposed to think that, that isn’t allowed- Scott’s disgusting for even letting that thought breach his mind, he’s not gay, he can’t be gay, but he knows he is and that’s the worst part- Scott can feel the breakdown from before pressing even harder in the back of his skull, because from his dream father, his real life father, Xornoth being absolutely horrendous, and now a reminder of one of the many ways he’s utterly repulsive inside and out, it’s just too much for him to take.

Scott needs to talk to Shelby, the main therapist of their group, because though she doesn’t know that he’s gay (disgusting) she knows about the other things, like his father and Xornoth. Scott’s not ready to tell anyone other than Owen that he’s gay (revolting) yet, if ever. He’ll try as hard as he can to beat it out.

He whips out his phone and pulls up the group chat, making sure to prop up his textbook to hide the fact that he’s texting, as Mr Jau is very particular about that kind of thing. It doesn’t seem like anyone’s on right now, however, which is…not optimal for Scott. 

And if he can’t talk to Shelby, he needs to find a distraction. But then he remembers he’ll see Shubble next period anyway, and even if he can’t find something else to focus on, he should be able to make it the ten minutes before homeroom’s over and the real school day begins.

He’s just scrolling through his notifs now, finding a few from his mutuals, rolling his eyes affectionately at the crazed reposts of fanart. Then he notices that in the absence of him and Owen while they were walking to school, Joel and Shelby (the bus riders of the group), have been talking about something. Scott knows it’s wrong to snoop, but like, they put whatever they were talking about on the group chat, so they must have meant him to see it, right?

And now that Scott knows there’s something to know, he absolutely has to do a bit of “detective work.”

He scrolls to his last sent message, a hasty gn love yall xx that he had typed out before his father had come into his room for his nightly inspection of Scott last night, and reads from there. Owen, Joel, and Shelby hadn’t stayed long after he’d gone, trickling away at about eleven, which leaves him with a slight pang of relief that he hasn’t missed anything. The conversation had resumed this morning, while he and Owen were walking to school. 

He really doesn’t have much to do, and he’s secretly very curious what they were talking about, so he begins to scroll through the texts.

thesmallbeans: hey shelby you there

shubbleshrubble: heyo joel :)

thesmallbeans: did you see, there’s a new kid?

shubbleshrubble: wdym, i dont go on your bus ofc not you idiot

thesmallbeans: shut up your short you cant talk but yeah, there’s like a new guy, hes got wings so i think hes an avian

thesmallbeans: he’s sitting a few seats in front of me he got on the stop after mine

shubbleshrubble: huh we havent had a new student in a while much less an avian arent they rare? I think grians the only avian at school right?

thesmallbeans: FOR GOODNESS SAKES shubble YES theyre rare do you pay NO attention during species studies?!?! 

shubbleshrubble: ummmmmm

shubbleshrubble: anywayyyy

thesmallbeans: also no hes not the only one you’ve forgotten about beks

shubbleshrubble: oh right beky but shes a year lower so why would i remember her

thesmallbeans: i remembered her and i have like the worst memory arent gnomes suppotsed to be all wise and remembering things?????

shubbleshrubble: shut up joel

shubbleshrubble: im super smart you dont know anything about me

shubbleshrubble: im a mystery ;)

thesmallbeans: uh huh. sure

shubbleshrubble: oh shush

shubbleshrubble: anyway what does this new kid look like??

thesmallbeans: hes blonde and his wings are like bright yellow, hes pretty tall for an avian, blue eyes and hes wearing the girls uniform

thesmallbeans: like the one with the skirt i mean

shubbleshrubble: huh 

shubbleshrubble: do you konw his name

thesmallbeans: i think its timmy or something like that

thesmallbeans: oop bus pulling up gtg cya @ school

…Huh. That’s interesting. So there is a new student, and chances are, based on the chair seated ominously by his side, Scott has a class or two with him. He’s, annoyingly enough, slightly interested about this so-called “Timmy,” wonders what he looks like-

STOP IT, SCOTT. STOP. It’s the second time this morning and two more times than he can handle. He tries to convince himself the reason he’s so intrigued by this turn of events is because the new kid is a rarer species, because he’s supposedly tall for an avian, because he seems like an interesting person, choosing to wear the skirt uniform and all that. There are times when Scott wishes that he could wear it himself, but of course, his father would never condone such an unmanly outfit.

He slides his phone back into his pocket, closing the textbook and pushing it back into his desk as someone walks into the room, and Scott cranes his head forwards, because is it him, is it the new boy?

Scott flumps back into his seat, realizing it’s only Joel. He suppresses a sigh; he should have known not to get his hopes up, but an avian? They’re the least-common sentient species, having been hunted to extinction for their wings by other species, most noticeably the seafolk. 

Their small stature and group nesting habits make them a predictable and easy to target people, and hundreds of avians are murdered each day, from the owls to the penguins to the canaries. It would be so interesting to meet a new avian, someone who seems to be neither an owl, like Beks, the one in the year below, or Grian, who’s a parrot.

Scott tries to convince himself this is the reason he’s interested.

But he realizes he’s been unfair, as Joel is never “only” Joel. He’s a celestial, and a sky celestial at that, so he’s almost inherently gorgeous, as well as extremely fucking tall. His light blue skin ripples with white cloud-like spots, his hair dark brown shot with a green streak that’s always reminded Scott of lighting, tied back into a short ponytail. A green laurel tattoo snakes down Joel’s right arm, his smooth, jewel-covered tail snaking along the floor behind him.

He stands at almost eleven feet, and he hasn’t stopped growing yet. Scott’s been friends with Joel for the longest time out of any of his closest companions, their friendship dating back to fourth grade, when Scott had nicked a few of Joel’s pencils during class. He’d thought he’d gotten off scot free (heh heh), but he’d been met at his locker by a glowering Joel, arms crossed and eyebrows raised.

Joel had been eight feet tall even then, and had picked up Scott by the scruff of his neck and put him on top of the lockers “to teach him a lesson,” in the celestial’s own words. But he had come back not five minutes later and brought Scott down, offering a profuse apology and saying he was working on “not being a menace.” They’ve been friends ever since.

Joel saunters across the room, taking his spot in the corner behind Scott, as he’s too tall for any desk this school has to offer. “Hey, Scott,” he grins in that cocky Joel way of his, “What’s up?”

“Eh, not much, you?” Scott asks, smiling back at him.

“Oh, you know, just…stuff.” He waves his hands vaguely, and Scott has to duck to avoid being backhanded by the unchecked limbs. “Hey, by the way, have you seen Lizzie today?” Joel’s eyes begin to go misty thinking about his not-so-secret crush. Scott’s pretty sure she’s completely oblivious of Joel’s affections, and he doesn’t know how that’s possible, but seafolk are notably fuzzy-minded when kept away from the ocean for an extended amount of time, so that probably explains why.

But Joel’s crush is still so glaringly obvious that even with how much Lizzie’s brain must be muffled, Scott can’t imagine how she hasn’t noticed so far.

“No, I haven’t, why?” Scott decides it’s best to humor Joel, to let him go on and on about Lizzie and how her hair cascades off her head and how pink it is and how much she looks like an axolotl with those frills that surround her neck and how her skin is so blue but not sky blue like Joel’s, blue like the ocean deep and dark, blue like the ocean Lizzie calls home. All Scott has to do is offer a few “mhm”s and nods, and Joel will be happy. Scott’s learned long ago that this is the best way to deal with Joel, because when he has something to talk about, ye gods, he will talk. 

“By the way, Joel,” Scott says, interrupting a detailed and decidedly very sappy description of how Lizzie’s eyes glitter in the sunlight, “Can you tell me more about that new kid who goes on your bus? I saw your texts.”

Joel looks slightly miffed that he’s been cut off, but diverts his attention to Scott nonetheless. That’s a first. “Uh, sure, what do you want to know?”

“For starters, you said he was an avian? What kind?” Scott leans forward, chin resting on his hands.

“Um, something with bright yellow wings? Like, almost solid yellow, no patterns.” Joel’s disinterested, staring off into the distance, almost certainly mooning over Lizzie, though silently this time (thank god).

“Joel,” Scott chastises admonishingly. “Now who doesn’t pay attention in species studies? The only avian types with solid yellow wings are canaries and some parrots- did the new kid have more upwards pointing or downwards pointing ear feathers?”

“Downwards pointing, I think,” Joel answers, “They were all fluffed out, though. His wing feathers too.”

“Okay, so he’s a canary,” Scott realizes, ripples running down his spine. “And the fluffed feathers means he was nervous. And understandably, starting a new school and all that? That’s a lot to take in at once. You said his name was Timmy?”

“Yeah, I think so,” Joel’s squinting, as if trying to find the answer off in the distance somewhere. “But I can’t be sure, he said his name kinda quietly when the bus driver asked what it was. Hey, why are you so interested in this new kid anyway?”

“Oh, no real reason,” Scott hastily reassures. “Avians are just so rare, though, and the canary bit is interesting too- they’re the least common avian type of all, and isn’t there a proverb about canaries being the harbingers of death?”

“Maybe,” Joel mutters, clearly not really engaging with the conversation. “I don’t really know- can I go back to talking about Lizzie now?”

Scott rolls his eyes and half-holds in an exasperated sigh. “Sure, Joel. Go straight ahead.” Scott’s still only half-listening, the rest of his mind wondering about the new kid; an avian, and a canary? That’s an interesting combination, Scott thinks, especially since, as he’s already stated, canaries in particular are one of the rarest avian types. 

The more he thinks about it, the more interested he is in this new student, and before he knows it, the bell has rung and he’s off to math. Waving goodbye to Joel, who stays in homeroom for his next class, Scott weaves his way through the hallways crowded to the brim with students of all species. Friends are snickering and chatting animatedly in little groups of three about the newest gossip or newest episode of their favorite series or loudly bragging about how gay they are.

Scott smirks dryly at that last one, his secret still held close to his chest. He’s so caught up in his own mind that he doesn’t notice where he’s going, and someone collides directly into his chest, causing him to stagger back a couple steps.

Now, Scott is by no means tall, landing squarely at around five and a half feet, but whoever’s collided with him is a significant bit shorter, by at least four inches, given the feel of it. This weirdly short person mutters a stammered apology, ducking behind Scott before he can get a good look at them, and by the time he’s craned his head back to try to catch a glimpse of his mysterious offender, they’re gone.

Scott doesn’t even notice the feather laying right at his feet as he rolls his eyes and enters his science class, the bright yellow plume flying up, up, up to the ceiling under the scuff of his feet, landing on the rafters far above the crowded mass below.

[myveryownfanfiction]

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

warnings: shitty job

AN: yes this happened to me and yes this is how I’m dealing with it

I slammed the door as I walked into the apartment. Dropping my bag at my feet and peeling off the jacket, I locked the door and tossed my stuff somewhere in the room. Heading straight for my bedroom, I grabbed a pillow off the bed and screamed into it as loud as I could. My scream broke into a sob and I fell onto the bed. I kicked my feet slightly, letting out my frustration any way that I could. I laid there and cried for what felt like hours. The soft click made me prop my chin on the pillow and the gentle hand on my back made me sigh.

“that bad of a day huh?” Jake asked as he sat down next to me.

“Bad wouldn’t begin to cover it.” I sighed as I rolled over to look at him. He winced at my red, puffy eyes and reached up to wipe away some stray tears. “That full time job I put in for? Where I work?” Jake nodded.

“what about it?” He asked. I laughed humorlessly.

“I had to find out from a coworker that someone had interviewed for it and was being offered it.” Jakes eyebrows scrunched together. “I got nothing from my boss about it. Either way a response would have been nice. Email or in person I don’t care. Nothing from HR except thanks for applying and how happy they were to see my name in the list of applicants.” I rolled my eyes and threw up my hands. “Zip. Zero. Nada.”

“and you found all this out from a coworker?” Jake asked. I nodded. “Did this coworker know you applied?” I shook my head.

“no he didn’t. So guess who had to act like they weren’t disappointed and upset and just wanting to go home after being there an hour.” Jake leaned down and kissed me softly.

“why didn’t you text me?” He asked, voice low and full of disbelief. “We could have made up some excuse to get you out of there. Flynn would have loved to have you come in to consult on this one.” Jake laid down next to me.

“really?” I asked, turning into him. “What’d you guys go after today?”

“A glowy cube thing. I don’t know what it was.” I gasped slightly.

“a tesseract?!” I exclaimed. Jake shrugged. “Oh my goodness jake! Did you guys find it at least?”

“yeah. Thanks to Cassie.” Jake said. “It would have gone a lot smoother if you were there. Jenkins was nearly ripping his hair out.” I laughed.

“you’re telling me Jenkins had to go out with you guys? How did he survive that?” Jake chuckled as he smiled at me.

“I don’t know. Must be something to do with his immortality.” Jake joked. I laughed harder.

“poor Jenkins. Remind me next time I have to consult to take him some more tea and baked goods.” Jake nodded, filing away the information for later. There was a soft gold glow around my closet door and we both looked over at it. There was the sound of something being slipped under and jake got up, a strange sort of smile on his face.

“I think your day is going to start looking up.” He said as I sat up to see him holding a white envelope between his fingers.

“Is that…?” I asked, trailing off as I didn’t quite believe I had gotten one.

“Yep.” He held out the envelope to me and I ripped it open. Pulling out the card inside, I watched as the words appeared in a shimmer of gold light.

“The library wants me!” I cried out, a new wave of tears starting. “The library wants me permanently.” I looked up at jake in disbelief. “I get to work with you at the library.” I breathed out. Jake nodded as he knelt on the bed.

“the library wants you.” He whispered back before he kissed me. “Welcome to the team.” I hugged him tightly, holding the paper up behind his back so I could read the words on it again.

“I have to quit.” I said as I pulled away quickly to make the call to my boss as jake watched on, a proud look on his face.

[iceyrukia]

IT IS OBSCENE: A TRUE REFLECTION IN THREE PARTS

PART ONE

When you are a public figure, people will write and say false things about you. It comes with the territory. Many of those things you brush aside. Many you ignore. The people close to you advise you that silence is best. And it often is. Sometimes, though, silence makes a lie begin to take on the shimmer of truth.

In this age of social media, where a story travels the world in minutes, silence sometimes means that other people can hijack your story and soon, their false version becomes the defining story about you.

Falsehood flies, and the Truth comes limping after it, as Jonathan Swift wrote.

Take the case of a young woman who attended my Lagos writing workshop some years ago; she stood out because she was bright and interested in feminism.

After the workshop, I welcomed her into my life. I very rarely do this, because my past experiences with young Nigerians left me wary of people who are calculating and insincere and want to use me only as an opportunity. But she was a Bright Young Nigerian Feminist and I thought that was worth making an exception.

She spent time in my Lagos home. We had long conversations. I was support-giver, counsellor, comforter.

Then I gave an interview in March 2017 in which I said that a trans woman is a trans woman, (the larger point of which was to say that we should be able to acknowledge difference while being fully inclusive, that in fact the whole premise of inclusiveness is difference.)

I was told she went on social media and insulted me.

This woman knows me enough to know that I fully support the rights of trans people and all marginalized people. That I have always been fiercely supportive of difference, in general. And that I am a person who reads and thinks and forms my opinions in a carefully considered way.

Of course she could very well have had concerns with the interview. That is fair enough. But I had a personal relationship with her. She could have emailed or called or texted me. Instead she went on social media to put on a public performance.

I was stunned. I couldn’t believe it. But I mostly held myself responsible. My spirit had been slightly stalled, from the beginning, by her. My first sense of unease with her came when she posted a photo taken in my house, at a time when I did not want any photos of my personal life on social media. I asked that she take it down. The second case of unease was her publicizing something I had told her in confidence about another member of the workshop. The most upsetting was when she, without telling me, used my name to apply for an American visa. Above all else was my lingering suspicion that she was a person who chose as friends only those from whom she could benefit. But she was a Bright Young Nigerian Feminist and I allowed that sentiment to over-ride my unease.

After she publicly insulted me, it was clear to me that this kind of noxious person had no business in my life, ever again.

A few months later, she sent this affected, self-regarding email which I ignored.

Friday September 15 2017 at 4.35 AM Dearest Chimamanda, Happy birthday. I mean this with all my heart, even though I know I have fallen (removed myself?) from your grace. It would be impossible for me to stop loving you; long before you gave me the possibility of being your friend you were the embodiment of my deepest hopes, and that will never change.I think of you often, still – stating the obvious. I grieve the loss of our friendship; it is a complicated sadness. I’m sorry that I caused you pain, or to feel like you can no longer trust me. There’s so much that I wish could be said.I pray this birthday is the happiest one yet. I wish you rest and quiet and abiding stability, and of course more of the kind of success that means the most to you.I hope mothering X is everything you hoped and prayed for and more.Have a wonderful day today. Love always.

About a year later, she sent this email, which I also ignored.

Thursday November 29 2018 at 8.42 AM Dear Chimamanda, I realise this is long overdue and vastly insufficient, but I’m really sorry. I’ve spent so much time going back and forth in my head and my email drafts; wondering whether to write you, how to write you, what to say, all kinds of things. But in the end, this is the thing I realise I need to say.I’m sorry I disappointed and hurt you by saying things publicly that were sharply critical, unkind and even disrespectful, especially in light of all the backlash and criticism you experience from people who don’t know you. I could have acted with more consideration towards you. I should have, especially given the privilege of intimacy that you had offered me. There are many reasons why I chose to behave the way I did, but none of them is an excuse. And I clearly realise now, after many, many months of needless sadness and angst and hurt and actual confusion, that I did not treat you as a friend would—certainly not as someone would to whom you had offered unprecedented access to yourself and your life.You’ve meant the world to me since I was barely a teenager. It’s been very hard navigating the emotional fallout of the past several months, knowing you were displeased with me but truly not quite understanding why, then deciding I didn’t care, then realising that would never be true. I’ve always cared. But I was too mixed up about the situation to be able to make sense of it, or properly see past my own justifications. I’m sorry it took me so long to grasp how I let you down.I realise that I don’t have room to ask anything of you, but I would be grateful for a chance to say this in person. Still, even if I never get that, I really hope you believe me.Congratulations on restarting the workshop, and on all the other amazing successes of the past several months. I think of you often; it would be impossible not to. You look so happy in your pictures. I really hope you are well. All my love,

I hoped never to hear from her again. But she has recently gone on social media to write about how she “refused to kiss my ring,” as if I demanded some kind of obeisance from her. She also suggests that there is some dark, shadowy ‘more’ to tell that she won’t tell, with an undertone of “if only you knew the whole story.”

It is a manipulative way of lying. By suggesting there is ‘more’ when you know very well that there isn’t, you do sufficient reputational damage while also being able to plead deniability. Innuendo without fact is immoral.

No, there isn’t more to the story. It is a simple story – you got close to a famous person, you publicly insulted the famous person to aggrandize yourself, the famous person cut you off, you sent emails and texts that were ignored, and you then decided to go on social media to peddle falsehoods. It is obscene to tell the world that you refused to kiss a ring when in fact there isn’t any ring at all.

I cannot make much of the hostility of strangers who do not know me – fame taints our view of the humanity of famous people. But the truth is that the famous person remains irretrievably human. Fame does not inoculate the famous person from disappointment and depression, fame does not make you any less angered or hurt by the duplicitous nature of people. To be famous is to be assumed to have power, which is true, but in the analysis of fame, people often ignore the vulnerability that comes with fame, and they are unable to see how others who have nothing to lose can lie and connive in order to take advantage of that fame, while not giving a single thought to the feelings and humanity of the famous person.

And when you personally know a famous person, when you have experienced their humanity, when you have benefited from their kindness, and yet you are unable to extend to them the basic grace and respect that even a casual acquaintanceship deserves, then it says something fundamental about you.

And in a deluded way, you will convince yourself that your hypocritical, self-regarding, compassion-free behavior is in fact principled feminism. It isn’t. You will wrap your mediocre malice in the false gauziness of ideological purity. But it’s still malice. You will tell yourself that being able to parrot the latest American Feminist orthodoxy justifies your hacking at the spirit of a person who had shown you only kindness. You can call your opportunism by any name, but it doesn’t make it any less of the ugly opportunism that it is.

PART TWO

When I first read this person’s work, which was their application to my writing workshop, I thought the sentences were well-done. I accepted this person. At the workshop, I thought they could have been more respectful of the other participants, perhaps not kept typing dismissively as others’ stories were discussed, with an air of being among people below their level. After the workshop, I decided to select the best stories, edit them, pay the writers a fee, and publish them in an e-magazine. The first story I chose was this person’s. I wrote a glowing introduction, which the story truly deserved.

They sent this email.

Fri, Aug 7, 2015, 8:20 AM Thank you so much for that introduction. It means so much to me and I’m going to keep reading it to get through the rest of my stay at Syracuse. I sent it to my mother and she got nervous about the piece because you said ‘it disturbs’, said she’s not sure how she’s going to feel when she reads it. But she’s also one of those ��let’s leave the past in the past’ people. My sister approved, which meant a lot because our childhoods were each other’s.All that to say, I’m so grateful you gave me the space to write the short version of this piece, the encouragement to write the longer piece, and now, a platform for it. I definitely have plans to write more about Aba.Thank you, with all my heart.PS- I wanted to sign off gratefully + gracefully in Igbo but I said let me not fall my own hand 🙂

About a year later, they sent another email to let me know that their novel would be published.

Wed, Jun 8, 2016, 8:20 AM Greetings! I hope all’s been well with you this past year. Belated congratulations on the baby’s arrival, I hope she’s being a delight (I’m sure she is), and on the Johns Hopkins honors.I was thinking about how this time last year, I’d just received the email from you about Farafina and I wanted to reach out with a quick update. I’ve just accepted an offer for the novel I excerpted as my application and it feels like the workshop was a catalyst for the events that’ve led me here. So, thank you, for the workshop and your words and the Olisa TV series and listening to me babble on about my story at the hotel. I deeply appreciate all of it and you. All my best,

Before the novel was published, I spoke of it to some people, to help it get attention. I had not been able to finish reading it. I found the writing beautiful, but the story false-hearted and burdened by bathos. When I spoke of the novel, however, it was the former sentiment that I expressed, never the latter.

After I gave the March 2017 interview in which I said that a trans woman is a trans woman, I was told that this person had insulted me on social media, calling me, among other things, a murderer. I was deeply upset, because while I did not really know them personally, I felt they knew what I stood for and that I fully supported the rights of trans people, and that I do not wish anybody dead.

Still, I took no action. I ignored the public insult.

When this person’s publishers sent me an early copy of their novel, I was surprised to see that my name was included in their cover biography. I had never seen that done in a book before. I didn’t like that I had not been asked for permission to use my name, but most of all I thought – why would a person who thinks I’m a murderer want my name so prominently displayed in their biography?

Then I learned that, because my name was in the cover biography, a journalist had called them my “protegee” and they then threw a Twitter tantrum about it, calling it clickbait, viciously disavowing having received any help from me.

I knew this person had called me a murderer, I knew they were actively campaigning to “cancel” me and tweeting about how I should no longer be invited to speak at events. But this I felt I could not ignore.

I sent an email to my representative:

From: Chimamanda Adichie Date: Wed, Feb 14, 2018 at 2:06 PM I’m writing about X She attended my Lagos workshop two years ago and I selected hers as one of a few pieces I published after the workshop. Apparently I was referred to as her ‘mentor’ and/or she was referred to as my ‘protege,’ in some articles, which led to her tweeting about it. Her tweets were forwarded to me by friends. In them, she reacted quite viscerally to my being called her ‘mentor’ and her being my ‘protege.’ To be fair, she is not technically my ‘protege,’ and it is perfectly fine that she feels this way, but her ungracious tone and the ugliness of the energy spent on her tweets surprised me. I recently received her book and noticed that my name was included in her official book bio. I was stunned. Surely if she is so strongly averse to my being considered a person who has been significant in her career, (which is my understanding of the loose use of protege/mentor) then it is unseemly to make the choice to include my name in her bio. I found it unusual, as I don’t think I’ve seen it done before in a book bio, but I also now find it unacceptably cynical. It is only reasonable for a person who sees my name as it is used in her bio — ‘her work has been selected and edited by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’ — to assume some sort of mentor/protege relationship. To publicly disavow this with a tone bordering on hostility and at the same time so baldly use my name to sell her book is utterly unacceptable to me. I’d like you to please reach out to her publishers and ask that my name be removed from her official book bio. I refuse to be used in this way. Chimamanda

After contacting her publishers, my representative wrote:

They have asked whether your preference would be to remove the Acknowledgment to you in the back of the book also, in future reprints.

I replied:

I don’t think that is my decision to take, and so will not answer either way, although it would be ideal if she herself made the decision to do so.

On the subject of how to go about it, I was absolutely determined not to be used by this person, but I was also sensitive to the costs the publisher might incur, as this was not in any way the publisher’s fault. Instead of pulping the already printed copies, I asked that the jackets be stripped and rebound. To my representative I wrote:

I’m completely determined that I not be used in this opportunistic and hypocritical way. But I want to make sure to proceed reasonably.

I was assured that my name would be removed and I moved on.

But from time to time, I would be informed of yet another social media post in which this person had attacked me.

This person has created a space in which social media followers have – and this I find unforgiveable – trivialized my parents’ death, claiming that the sudden and devastating loss of my parents within months of each other during this pandemic, was ‘punishment’ for my ‘transphobia.’

This person has asked followers to pick up machetes and attack me.

This person began a narrative that I had sabotaged their career, a narrative that has been picked up and repeated by others.

The normal response would be to ignore it all, because this person is seeking attention and publicity to benefit themselves. Claiming that I have sabotaged their career is a lie and this person knows that it is a lie. But if something is repeated often enough, in this age in which people do not need proof or verification to run with a story, especially a story that has outrage potential, then it can easily begin to seem true.

My addressing this lie will indeed get this person some attention – may they bask in it.

Here is the truth: I was very supportive of this writer. I didn’t have to be. I wasn’t asked to be. I supported this writer because I believe we need a diverse range of African stories.

Sabotaging a young writer’s career is just not my style; I would get no benefit or satisfaction from it. Asking that my name be removed from your biography is not sabotaging your career. It is about protecting my boundaries of what I consider acceptable in civil human behavior.

You publicly call me a murderer AND still feel entitled to benefit from my name?

You use my name (without my permission) to sell your book AND then throw an ugly tantrum when someone makes a reference to it?

What kind of monstrous entitlement, what kind of perverse self-absorption, what utter lack of self-awareness, what unheeding heartlessness, what frightening immaturity makes a person act this way?

Besides, a person who genuinely believes me to be a murderer cannot possibly want my name on their book cover, unless of course that person is a rank opportunist.

PART THREE

In certain young people today like these two from my writing workshop, I notice what I find increasingly troubling: a cold-blooded grasping, a hunger to take and take and take, but never give; a massive sense of entitlement; an inability to show gratitude; an ease with dishonesty and pretension and selfishness that is couched in the language of self-care; an expectation always to be helped and rewarded no matter whether deserving or not; language that is slick and sleek but with little emotional intelligence; an astonishing level of self-absorption; an unrealistic expectation of puritanism from others; an over-inflated sense of ability, or of talent where there is any at all; an inability to apologize, truly and fully, without justifications; a passionate performance of virtue that is well executed in the public space of Twitter but not in the intimate space of friendship.

I find it obscene.

There are many social-media-savvy people who are choking on sanctimony and lacking in compassion, who can fluidly pontificate on Twitter about kindness but are unable to actually show kindness. People whose social media lives are case studies in emotional aridity. People for whom friendship, and its expectations of loyalty and compassion and support, no longer matter. People who claim to love literature – the messy stories of our humanity – but are also monomaniacally obsessed with whatever is the prevailing ideological orthodoxy. People who demand that you denounce your friends for flimsy reasons in order to remain a member of the chosen puritan class.

People who ask you to ‘educate’ yourself while not having actually read any books themselves, while not being able to intelligently defend their own ideological positions, because by ‘educate,’ they actually mean ‘parrot what I say, flatten all nuance, wish away complexity.’

People who do not recognize that what they call a sophisticated take is really a simplistic mix of abstraction and orthodoxy – sophistication in this case being a showing-off of how au fait they are on the current version of ideological orthodoxy.

People who wield the words ‘violence’ and ‘weaponize’ like tarnished pitchforks. People who depend on obfuscation, who have no compassion for anybody genuinely curious or confused. Ask them a question and you are told that the answer is to repeat a mantra. Ask again for clarity and be accused of violence. (How ironic, speaking of violence, that it is one of these two who encouraged Twitter followers to pick up machetes and attack me.)

And so we have a generation of young people on social media so terrified of having the wrong opinions that they have robbed themselves of the opportunity to think and to learn and to grow.

I have spoken to young people who tell me they are terrified to tweet anything, that they read and re-read their tweets because they fear they will be attacked by their own. The assumption of good faith is dead. What matters is not goodness but the appearance of goodness. We are no longer human beings. We are now angels jostling to out-angel one another. God help us. It is obscene.

[chormine-mutacerta]

Hey All!

It's Certa! I've decided to start from scratch completely, so I took down my original Tumblr in order for me to feel good about starting over.

I've saved the accounts of people I followed on said account, so please do not be alarmed if you see me suddenly following you (again), haha 😅

-------

To re-introduce myself, I'm a 2D Digital Artist that specializes in Character Design and World-Building, as well as a soon-to-be University Graduate that goes by she/her pronouns! My specialties contribute to the fact that I have hundreds of OCs (that all... need re-designing...); most of my OCs are actually Fan Characters, but I do have Original Characters for one main series that I'm working on called (Un)Natural Selection.

[I'm still thinking of reworking that world completely, as there are many negative memories associated with the creation of that series and I want to move away from it as much as possible (while still acknowledging that the way it came to light wasn't the best it could be), but I still want to keep the essence and the systems implemented in how that world works.]

That being said, most of my characters exist as some extension of the Fire Emblem and Cookie Run series. I used to be a big player + fan of Genshin Impact and Honkai Star Rail, but fell off after personal situations during May 2023; however, seeing as I have existing Genshin FCs in the works, I still plan on re-designing them as well.

I am ALSO a big fan of any and all ships (except the toxic and highly problematic ones, of course): OC + OC, Canon/Canon, OC/Canon (which is a majority of my current shippings and involves many Next Generation FCs), Rarepairs, you name it. Do note that I will NOT tolerate any hateful and/or oppressive behavior, especially concerning OCs and OC/Canon ships specifically. If you have nothing to say, kindly scroll on or even block me, I harbor no offense if you do.

[Also would like to point out that I ship some FE ships that are not considered "popular" within some of its fanbases, with some of them being straight ships; again, please no hate of any kind regarding this, or you will be hit with a block without warning. Like I said, any and all ships are welcome and should apply to everyone.]

Lastly, I have my Asks open, but no Anonymous Asks; an anonymous ask was one of the main reasons as to why I closed my old Tumblr account, so I'd rather people reach out to me "in-person". Unless you're someone I know who was involved in past conflicts, I am happily open to answer your DMs!

[loislaina]

I suppose its past time I wrote one of these for my main blog....

About Me

I'm a 30-something trans woman with a penchant for witchcraft, archaeology, and queer activism. I'm healing from complex PTSD, so do please bear that in mind. Feel free to follow me, but just letting you know now that if you cross any of my boundaries, I will block you.

DM policy - I'm not generally open to these, unless I message you first (which I will almost never do). If you do message me, keep in mind that I make liberal use of the block button, but I might reply if I feel like it. So DM at your own risk, basically. (This policy also applies to both people i happen to follow and mutuals. Just because we follow each other does *not* mean you are the exception.)

Ask policy - ask away! I will answer most questions. If i don't answer you it's because i don't feel like it.

Reblogs - feel free to reblog anything i post. Keep in mind that if i like or reblog something of yours, you shouldn't take it as an invitation to try and get to know me.

Comments - comments are generally okay, except if they cross any boundaries of mine. Sometimes I might leave comments on your posts, but again, this is not an invitation.

Absolutely NO horny DMs, nudes, or general idiots will be tolerated. This includes but is not limited to: fascists, radfems/terfs, conservatives, racists, bigots of any kind, sissy blogs, porn bots, people who think they can be my dom, and people who think they're the exception to these rules. If you fall into any of the above categories, or even if I don't like the way your vibes feel, YOU WILL BE BLOCKED ON SIGHT.

I do have an nsfw sideblog, but i don't repost that sort of thing here.

All that said, I do try and be friendly to people. I am rather wary of others due to past experiences here and elsewhere, however, so tbh I find it necessary to establish these boundaries.

So, baaaasically.... if you're a mature, balanced, and compassionate person, and if you respect my boundaries, you're very welcome here.

[tacticalhimbo]

-> PINNED POST

welcome to my wild ass corner of the internet — here's some important information taken from this post [link that can be reblogged]:

I've joined the writer's portion of the ficsforgaza initiative to help encourage fundraising to vetted fundraisers to aid those in Gaza! Please check out the blog's guide on participation as well as their FAQ. Make sure to check out the other writers taking requests!

WHAT YOU DO: Donate to any of the vetted fundraisers found on the blog, or the blogs they have reblogged information from, and send me an ask or DM with your request!

Also, if you're unsure where to donate to, check out the following resources: Vetted Gaza Evacuation Fundraisers List Help Gaza Children Operation Olive Branch's Spreadsheet of Fundraisers

It is mandatory that you include proof of donation for this. Please redact personal information! I will verify proofs where needed with the blog organizers. Example: hey jay! i donated to the palestine childrens' relief fund and would like a fic featuring [character] and [character] with [prompt]. here's proof of my donation! [attached image]. There will be NO anonymous requests! It's harder to verify things that way.

For every $1 you donate, I will write 100 words. My limit on this will be $20, or 2000 words. That's the average wc for most of my fics.

WHAT I DO / MY PERSONAL GUIDELINES: Safe for work (SFW) content only! I don't feel comfortable writing smut for people.

YES: OC x OC, OC x Canon, Self-Ship or x Reader, Canon x Canon, Romantic, Platonic, Familial, pretty much any dynamic or theme goes! NO: Proship content. I do not feel comfortable with that, and I do not endorse any of that kind of stuff.

FANDOMS: Cyberpunk (Edgerunners & 2077), Disco Elysium, Dragon Age, Faith: The Unholy Trinity, Fallout, Far Cry, Hitman (World of Assassination Trilogy), Metal Gear, Outer Worlds, Rainbow Six Siege, Red Dead Redemption 2, Reflect Studios franchise (Welcome to the Game, Scrutinized, Dead Signal, etc), Resident Evil, Skyrim, Splinter Cell (games only)

Full DNI / BYF criteria [below; originally linked NeoCities page]. Examples of my written works can be found here, with fanfictions toward the bottom of the page!

MISC. INFORMATION

I will try to publish requests as soon as possible! I've luckily got a decent bit of free time, but I am also chronically ill and have a life outside of Tumblr! There is no real deadline with these things, as the main goal is (again) helping people and families in need. That should take precedence above all else.

Please don't feel pressured to donate! I know things are rough for everyone across the board when it comes to finances! If you happen to have the extra money and would like to contribute to this cause, then please do so! This applies even to those who may not want something out of it. I've shared many fundraisers and resources, as have countless others, and there are proper channels to help people out <3

now, here's a bit about me:

name. jason (jay or jas works too) pronouns. they / it / xe / pup & es / xier (auf deutsch, bitte!) age. 24+ languages. english (and sometimes german) misc. chronically ill / disabled (long covid, impaired vision, impaired hearing), neurodivergent (autism, adhd, c-ptsd), regrettably from florida

and my blog:

do not interact if you are… racist / xenophobic antisemetic / islamophobic / discriminate against non-christian religions queerphobic / terf / tehm / transmedicalist / misc. exclusionist misogynistic ableist pedophile (apologist) / "pro-ship" pro-ana / pro- eating disorders a nazi, right winger / conservative, trump / desantis / maga supporter, pro-police / pro-military, believe all lives matter (aka: discredit blm and similar bipoc-focused movements) etc etc.

i support human rights for all folks, plain and simple. if you're willing to make any exceptions because "xyz group makes me uncomfy and i heard from fox news", i do not want you here. i do not care for you. you deserve rights, too, but you are not entitled to my time or energy.

i reserve the right to block or refuse interaction in accordance to my safety / comfort. any content i post across my platforms is for me / those who request it. don't like it? keep scrolling. asks are off for an indefinite period of time until y'all learn to fucking behave. asks back on but the privilege can and will be revoked at will. my content may not be suitable for all audiences, but i ensure to do my best in tagging potentially mature and / or upsetting content material. please do not hesitate to reach out to me if you need specific things tagged for your viewing pleasure.

the template i use for my fic uploads was made by noahresources! [template link]

tracking tag: #userhimbo

here are some navigation links (that may or may not work):

mutuals / besties. hev [tag] | delia [tag] | vendetta [tag] | ollie [tag] | avarice [tag] | alice [tag] | my brother [tag] | my dog [tag] | my three cats [tag 1 ; tag 2 ; tag 3] | stray cat we've practically adopted [tag]

creations. ocs [tag] | writing [tag] | fics [tag] | art [tag] | gifs [tag] | edits [tag] | virtual photography [tag] | neocities [link]

information. general [tag] | mutual aid [tag] | neocities [link] | ko-fi [link]

sideblogs. queeracing (formula 1; link) | pistolenprinz (rdr2; link) | jessepinkmanbf (brba & bcs; link) | devitalization (gamedec; link) | tacticalvalor (multimuse rp; link) | tactikink (multimuse smut rp; link) | simply-jason (archive url; link) | j******* (rpc/rph; not-affiliated / purposefully separate)

more below the cut.

potentially frequently asked questions:

why do you type in all lower case? easier to read, easier to type.

didn't you used to go by [x]? i won't say, usually. i have posted about some of it before, but i'm not gonna trudge anything back up. personal name changes are part of my gender journey, url changes are for a reason / because i can.

i saw you used to do paid commissions! will you open those again? maybe. it really depends on how i can take payment and whether or not i feel safe doing that. accessible payment methods risk me being outed, and in the most unsafe state in the united states for trans* folk... i would rather not risk that if i can avoid it.

do you take writing / fic requests that aren't paid? sure! i don't mind writing things or creating things for people free of charge, as long as you actually... respect it. don't steal my shit, don't claim you wrote it, etc etc. i know i can't stop you, but i can (and will) shit talk you and drag you through the mud if i catch you doing it. i know my worth. don't try to play me because you're an insecure fuck.

why do you sometimes write trans*? isn't the asterisk redundant/problematic/etc? afaik, no. it's a habit i picked up while writing about trans folk in an academic context where my audience was primarily cis. it literally means nothing more than showcasing that trans is an umbrella term that includes various labels (e.g., transgender, transsexual, transmasc, transfem, etc etc.). if someone has made it problematic, or used it in discourse/exclusionary circles, i am not aware of that. and if that is enough to make you think i'm an exclusionist... why are you even here? genuinely.

can you tag posts with queer as "q-slur" or something similar? no. queer is my identity. don't like it, don't stick around.

why are some types of campaigns tagged as "important" and others tagged as "bump!"? well, context is dependent. but right now trying to help victims of genocide takes precedent. of course, i encourage everyone to donate to any of the campaigns i share regardless of content, as everyone deserves their basic needs filled.

some terms i use to describe my identity and orientation include:

ambiamorous

cybercoric (coined by fairystar-fag)

cyberdog (coined by burgerlabs)

cybertransmasc / cyber transmasc (coined by grief-chapter)

nonbinary

polyamorous

queer

transgender

transmasculine

aromantic

allosexual

genderqueer

gender outlaw

and some fun facts about me include:

i'm a college graduate with a bachelor's degree focused on social work and correctional support management. i aim to work in mental health advocacy, and want to focus on marginalized / underrepresented populations.