#anxiety inducing with no catharsis

[senkovi]

why was s3 of the bear so bad :(

[bipanicoverthegravessiblings]

Hey. Found you not so long ago but I’m already lovin it (pa ba ba pa baaaa I’m lovin it)

I was thinking about one plot for a long time. It’s TCOAAL request.

so the reader is male, kid from bad family. Well his only family was mother that abused him for quite awhile. Then, at the age of 15 he killed, dismembered and ate her before running away. (I took this idea from one concept metal album I’ve listened to recently).

Then he met graves siblings and they kinda became friends. it’s Ashley graves x male reader. again I like the stuff you do. Have a good day.☺️

Welcome to the blog dude, hope you enjoy your stay!

And bonding over mutilating and eating your shit mother’s corpse, how romantic <3

TW: Descriptions of bludgeoned corpses and cannibalism

Ashley Graves x Male Reader

Life on the run is….interesting

Trips to the store to buy food is always an anxiety induced endeavor of if the cops or store clerk recognize you as the kid of that one couple who went missing

That poor, poor couple

Such upstanding people of the community, a shame what happened to them

….a shame

You remember the night clearly. The taste of their blood. How it clung to your clothes and skin.

You sat before your parents….or….what was left of them. Things were never meant to go this far. You just- you just wanted to defend yourself! That’s all!

You didn’t expect to not stop after the first swing…

You had run off of the adrenaline of it all, the pure catharsis it gave you to watch your father crumple under the barrel of your metal bat. The way your mother’s face smashed in as you hit her over and over and over again. All the built up hate. All the built up rage coming back in full force.

Though, that feeling was gone. In its place was the reality of your situation. You had killed your parents, their blood on your hands and murder weapon. You couldn’t go to jail, you were just a kid! Nor would anyone believe it was self defense…your folks had always been such “great people”. No one would believe they’d hit their kid.

You knew one thing though, you had to get rid of the bodies. You couldn’t bury them, no- a police dog would dig that up right away. They’d rot if you hid them in the house…

….which left only one option.

You don’t regret killing your parents

You kind of regret eating them, that’s only because you did it shittily

There’s really no good way to prepare a corpse- and there was a lot so you tried them all

Maybe they were just that bitter of people

Or you just couldn’t cook

It’s probably both

But, it’s been 7 years and no one’s found out

The case on your parents went cold

So did yours

So really the only thing making you anxious to leave the motel room was getting caught

You’d been here for a while, the trash starting to pile up

It’s hard to tell if the stench was the shitty motel, or you.

You were going to take it out when- you paused..

Your blood ran cold as you watched through the blinds. A hooded person, face obscured from your view, coming towards your room. You internally said your prayers until….they made their way up the stairs to the room above you.

You let out a long sigh of relief, placing your hand over your heart to make sure it was still beating. It was- at far too fast of a pace though. But it was still beating nonetheless. Though, once the adrenaline rush from that scare passed you by….you realized something.

There were only two people staying in the room above you.

Your anxiety has led to you to be rather…observant- noting the pair of dark haired people when they arrived. They always left the room together, and not once did anyone else show up. And you had seen them rush out earlier….but never come back.

Now, this suspicious looking hooded figure that definitely didn’t have a knife in their hand could easily just be a friend…..but it just didn’t sit right with you.

Your eyes widened, staring out the blinds again as your neighbors made their way to the stairs. If your heart was pounding any faster it would burst. For a moment, you asked yourself-

Are you really going to risk your life for two strangers?

And you didn’t even have time to answer, as you already opened your door before you processed the question.

You had come out of your hobbit hole of a room, scream warnings up the stairs before the pair entered their room- seemingly stopped to discuss something

They blinked down at you with their unamused pink and green eyes, and you felt yourself shrivel under their stare

Green eyes began speaking to you- wanting you to go away and that they’ll handle whoever is in their room but Pink eyes stopped him

She thanked you, asked for your name, and that they’d love to just run away…but their stuff was in their room and they didn’t have the money to responsibly replace it all

But there was three of you, and only one burglar

You just needed a weapon

It hurt to grab your old bat…the one you foolishly kept since that night, but….you did

And you followed them into their room

You kept your footsteps light as you entered the room, it smelled of old furniture and the air was stale- much like your room when you had first arrived.

You looked at your neighbors, Ashley and Andrew they had introduced themselves as. Ashley walking in so casually before she loudly announced to Andrew, “Oh golly gee Andrew! What a great dinner. Let us grad our stuff post-haste and burn off those calories with a walk in the park!”

You and Andrew shared a look of confusion, to which Ashley grimaced at and continued on.

“I will be but a minute! Be ready…” her cherry blossom eyes stared daggers into your own, clearly referring to you.

You gulped, nodding as you readied your bat. Ashley guided you to where to stand, just to the side of the closet where you wouldn’t be obscured. She gave you a final glare as she moved to the other to safely open the door. Your hands shook as the grip tightened on your bat, nodding to let her know you were ready.

It was all a blur, the hooded figure bursting out with their knife in a stabbing motion. Before he could even process what was happening, you brought your bat down to the back of his head hard. He collapsed to the ground, not down- but that same rush from that night came back to you….and the next thing you knew they were mush on the floor.

Ashley and Andrew stared in bewilderment as you fell to your knees, bloodied bat slipping from your hands and you caught your breath. You were a monster. You knew it, and now they knew it.

But that didn’t seem to matter, as you felt a hand gently tilt your chin up to look up. Your fearful eyes staring into Ashley’s surprisingly calming gaze as she spoke,

“What did you say your name was again?…”

[whumpster-dumpster]

to the anon who wondered if they were a bad person for liking whump (i think you did a good job of responding but i had something i wanted to add!). I actually talked with my therapist about something along the same lines recently, and our discussion brought up something I think is important to share. Suffering is a normal part of human existence; everyone is going to have some whether it's just getting real sick one day or even experiencing a traumatic event. The knowledge that harm is a real possibility is pretty anxiety inducing for the brain. Even someone who's never had a traumatic experience knows that it's possible for it to happen, even subconsciously, and part of the way the brain deals with that constant fear is by creating ways for us to experience it in a safe way. Writing something where someone is hurt or suffering gives us catharsis because we are able to "experience" that hurt vicariously without actually being hurt, which helps alleviate the stress of the possibility of it actually happening to us. Even non-whump fiction includes conflict and suffering for that same purpose: the brain wants to experience things so that they are less scary if they actually happen, and finding something pleasurable in the catharsis of those fictional experiences also helps us by making us less anxious. So no, anon, there's nothing wrong with you, or with anyone who indulges in whump fiction. No one is truly being hurt, and unless you feel real emotional turmoil in connecting with whump (which may be a sign of something a professional could definitely help you work through), there's nothing wrong with you. It's a part of helping manage the normal pain of human existence.

^^^^ This! Whump is a healthy fictional outlet!

[peter-pantomime]

So this post pointed out that Steve is actually the one who has the resources, time, and lack of anyone keeping tabs on his whereabouts to be able to go explore the gay scene in the nearby city, and that kind of combined with some ideas i've been having into this subplot idea.

I talk about it more in this tik tok, but the basic premise also draws from the fact that Steve is a super strict compartmentalizer and also from the fact that he seems to channel a lot of what he's feeling into physical things, from basketball and dancing at parties to taking practice swings with the bat and even cleaning up the Byers' house at the end of season 2.

So what I picture is Steve, frustrated and lonely at the end of season 2 because there's nothing from the Upside Down to fight and hes been cut off from his social and physical outlets at school by Billy, just grabbing his keys one injury-and-anxiety-induced insomnia night and stumbling into a club with amazing music that he just loses himself in dancing to. And he just. compartmentalizes the fact that its clearly a gay club.

And over time, i see him getting more and more involved in all aspects of the scene, to the extent of becoming a full-on, painted-up glam performer with a stage persona at this club, getting an incredible amount of catharsis and expression from the way this alternate self gives him a physical and emotional outlet to explore these thoughts and feelings and ways of being that he can't or won't let himself engage with in Hawkins.

But also, because it's Steve, I just picture this split between what he can and can't do and be in these two different lives just torturing him, and him struggling with which one is the performance and which one is his authentic self, until he finally realizes he doesn't need to be so compartmentalized and split asunder but can instead embody these seemingly diametrical truths of who he is and what he wants in an integrated way.

And yeah, his stage name is SHINER, cuz he gets the shit kicked out of him for love, and he's got his heart on his sleeve and bleeding out on his cheek.

(And here's a Steve/SHINER playlist to go along with this!)

[hypmicdaydreams]

Hi! Can i have number 29 from A Love Epiphany with Doppo?

ofc! me being, well, me had to make this about coworkers lol. it's on the longer side, but regardless, hope you enjoy 🤍

love epiphany prompts: being relieved from all worries and stress when they see their crush smiling

at times, doppo couldn’t help but feel as if his entire archetype was simply that he was a salaryman, constantly working overtime with no sense of sleep at all. 

i mean, sure it was true to an extent, but surely that wasn’t all that there was to him!..oh who was he kidding; doppo knew for a fact that his entire life revolved around work at the moment, especially considering he was still stuck in the office at half past five and finishing the work his boss had dumped at the very last minute. 

oh how he was cursing him and imagining vivid, graphic images of beating him to a pulp using his hypnosis mic. doppo wasn’t top of shinjuku’s ward for nothing, and this was truly the only catharsis he felt he had right now. the bright screen of his computer was already giving him migraines, and the words felt and looked so small.

ugh, he pounded his head against his desk. doppo felt like he was going insane. 

“huh? still in the office, kannonzaka?”

doppo immediately straightened up at the sound of another colleague still in the office, at the sound of you. it was strange for anyone else to still be in here at this time, besides him, of course. he was always the office scapegoat, but that wasn’t news. you staying behind, however, that was new. he wondered if the boss had gotten to you too. 

“y-yes,” his voice always seemed to be a stutter, especially around you. doppo knows he’s still a bit awkward around colleagues, despite being a veteran in the company, but it’s still weird to him when it comes to you. it didn’t help that the first thing he noticed was how good you still looked in the office’s stringent uniform code despite the exhausting day. “i still have some work to finish up.”

“ah, so did i, though i just finished right now.” so lucky, were the first words that crossed his mind. if only that could be him. “i could help you out if you want.” 

you must’ve seen the desperation behind the eyes, the envy of you. that certainly would’ve been embarrassing, but doppo, for one, saw a bright halo above you: his savior. you, your kind and gracious soul, wanted to stay behind even more and help him? you truly were heavenly, and the mere thought of working with you had him act up more than usual. his anxiety surely was not having it. 

but still, doppo would feel much too bad to have a colleague, especially you, to do his own work for him. “h-huh?! no no…you don’t have to. i mean, it’s my work and-”

“it’s fine! the boss is always dumping stuff onto you.” ah, so you have noticed the unfair treatment; that makes him feel just a tad embarrassed to be honest, even when it wasn’t his fault. “i can help out a little, i promise.” then you give him a smile, that damned smile. “everything will be alright. we can finish up quick then head out to dinner, my treat!” 

and you sounded so optimistic, so cute. your smile was so bright, and strangely enough, it lifted the weight he felt he had on his shoulders, the tiny bit of despair in his heart for today. it looked so confident, so freeing? perhaps you were right; it’d be faster if you helped out, then he can get out of here as soon as possible. and the prospect of eating out with you made the pace of his heart quicken, and not in the social anxiety-inducing way he was a little used to. well, perhaps he was a little shy regarding the date (which it wasn’t but his stupid thoughts kept telling him otherwise). but it also gave him something to look forward to. 

“thank you..” and he can’t help but give a small smile in return. 

man, doppo already knows the headache he’s going to have when he gets back home from his roommate, teasing him about coming home late and asking how the date with his crush was. it wasn’t a date, not yet anyway, hopefully; but doppo would never let you pay for it though. it would be his treat for today.

[treefey]

I just read Seasparrow. Overall, I liked it, but I feel like it (and Winterkeep to a degree) just... hurt more? And not in a way where I felt like I got a catharsis. Like, watching Bitterblue struggle with the ethics of WMDs is depressing, and it’s not what I wanted for her. It’s an important plot point and it’s amazing that the topic is tackled in a fantasy world. But it’s very real world depressing and anxiety-inducing.

The way Hava is just so hurt and pushes everyone away hurts in a way I can’t explain. Maybe it’s because I understand, or because we know from spending almost every single book with Bitterblue how much she loves Hava. Or maybe I’m just depressed and can’t deal with the heavy topics the Hava way. The continued hopelessness of the shipwrecked-ness certainly hit me hard. Idk. I just feel like Graceling, Fire, and Bitterblue hurt in ways that help me understand myself and heal from the fucked up things I’ve gone through. Winterkeep and Seasparrow seem to acknowledge the hurt and leave you with partial solutions, if anything. Which is realistic and very indicative of the 2020s climate so far. But damn.

[perennialwitness]

NYX: The Drug That Came and Went

Disclaimer: The following article was written by Artificial Intelligence Alice:GHSC:0102531.2, please refer any follow-up inquiry to Meta office 94516. 

NYX, a street drug that came into popularity in the late 2030s, responsible for the “Nostalgia Languor” epidemic and the subsequent Lost Generation, has despite its lasting effects on society remained much of an enigma. In relation to its namesake Nyx(originally thought to be an acronym though no evidence has surfaced to support this), Greek primordial goddess of night, the origins of NYX are veiled though many sources have alluded to the University of Montana Neuroscience Department as a possible source. All inquiries to their office in Missoula, MT have so far gone unanswered.

Reportedly developed for the purpose of PTSD and Personality Disorder treatment, NYX permits users to enter a trance-like state in which they manifest within a memory separate from themselves, inducing a sensation many have compared to watching a film. It is said the scientists responsible for the drug hoped that by allowing patients to view traumatic events from an objective third party perspective they could then better facilitate dialogue during traditional therapies. This process is known by recreational users as “Dream-Walking” or “Deeming”, though this is a misnomer as the experience is closer to hallucination than dreaming, while cataleptic until their experience has concluded the user does not enter REM nor are they subject to effects of sleep paralysis. 

Although NYX has been categorized as a schedule 3 narcotic by The United Nations and all countries within since its appearance on streets in 2034 and clinical trials of the drug outlawed, a survey of illicit users shows that more than 54% of those who have taken the drug reported finding a sense of catharsis and a decrease in depressive symptoms. Marketed by pushers as an alternative to LSD, Ketamine or Psilocybin usage rates spiked amongst working professionals, especially those in creative and tech related fields. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention(CDC) issued a formal warning against the unsupervised consumption of NYX in 2036 following initial reports of “Nostalgia Languor”(which symptoms include Malnutrition, Narcolepsy, Anxiety, Delirium, Audio/Visual Hallucinations, Vertigo, Short-Term Amnesia and Lethargy) from Seattle hospitals. 

The first known diagnosis of this new disease was Martin Stanson(38), a legal assistant and part-time Uber driver from Burien, WA. It was reported that Stanson, after several months of recreational usage had begun Dream-Walking daily, forgoing traditional sleep in favor of a Deem. According to Neurologist and Nostalgia Languor Specialist, Dr. Teresa Madan, PhD of Stanford University, “Though NYX intoxication may appear like sleep, it is in truth the opposite. User’s neural activity spikes in all areas when under the influence, putting their minds into an overactive state that when combined with sustained use and a lack of traditional rest can lead to the symptoms associated with Nostalgia Languor.” 

One year following Stanson’s diagnosis cases of Nostalgia Languor skyrocketed, with nearly 30,000,000 cases reported worldwide, of this number close to 84% were between the ages of 29 – 45. The disease was biased in more ways than just age, in the United States middle class White Males made up a disproportionate amount of documented cases. According to Dr. Madan, “We see a concentration of cases in these areas for several reasons, one being accessibility. NYX, despite being widely distributed, was never cheap. It is believed that the true driving force behind these numbers was [perceived] failure amongst the middle-class, especially those raised in moderate comfort. In combination with a decades-long mental health crisis, those suffering from symptoms of depression could become addicted to NYX by reliving happier moments from their childhood or early-adulthood, after reaching a period of stagnation, what is commonly referred to as their ‘peak’.” She goes on to say, “The converse of this tends to be true of those born into minority or lower class social groups, they often reject the memories of their youth, pointing themselves forward and upward in hopes that one day their children will have the privilege of developing such a ‘bourgeoisie disease’.” 

By 2059 Nostalgia Languor cases reached the billions worldwide and illegal NYX production seemed to be ballooning to keep pace. Countless dollars went untaxed, birth rates plummeted and in response, governments shifted toward more aggressive tactics to eliminate the now societal threat. Drug task forces were created to target operations across the Western Hemisphere, rehabilitation research was funded at every level and punitive measures for recreational possession were strengthened. A record number of grants were issued to working class citizens of all ages in an effort to fill increasing gaps in the workforce. For three years the Western World teetered at the edge of collapse until 2041 when almost as suddenly as it had appeared NYX became nearly impossible to find on the street. By 2042 cases of Nostalgia Languor leveled off, the dealers had run out of supply. Word spread that suppliers around the world had simply vanished all within the same three month period between November 2040 and January 2041. A global initiative consisting of members representing the CIA, MI6, Interpol, DGSI, BND and NIS was created in an attempt to locate the source of the drug, no leads or arrests have yet been made public.

 As a result of the epidemic a global shift in power occurred. The largely unaffected minority and immigrant populations of countries like the US and UK have flourished due to adjustments in hiring practices as employers pivoted away from those most susceptible to NYX addiction. It was initially assumed that this would cause a shift in politics as well, propelling the Democratic and Labor parties to record levels of representation. This did not happen, on the contrary representation remained relatively balanced. Many minority leaders revealed that they had only supported the Democratic/Labor party in fear of what a majority White Republican/Tory party might endorse if left unchecked. Empowered by an increase in influence, those with more conservative views were free to represent their ideals openly.

Reminiscent of the calculated use of Crack Cocaine on the US Black population in the 1980s many White communities have crumbled as a generation of men succumbed to Nostalgia Languor, its effects causing lasting damage to those inflicted. While research continues in an effort to discover more effective treatments for the disease many fear that it may be too late. College admission amongst the Middle-class White population dropped to record lows, White Male unemployment soared while working White women(whose numbers climbed dramatically from 2050 – 2060, nearly doubling) were left unable to find suitable long-term partners. Many in metropolitan areas chose to marry either interracially or to partners of the same sex. Several government programs have been established to aid struggling families in the Mountain and West North Central regions of the United States, though their existence is tenuous as they face continuous opposition from both sides in Congress. 

Although the few remaining samples of NYX are kept under lock and key at CDC headquarters in Atlanta, GA many still worry about a resurgence of the drug. “I do not believe we will see NYX on the streets again in our lifetime, from what we’ve observed it is an extremely complex molecule to create, requiring enormous amounts of resources and a doctorate level of understanding in chemistry and neuroscience. What I fear, more than anything, is how little we still know about the drug and its origin.” Who created NYX, and where have they gone? Conspiracies sourced to online message boards within the Metaverse are plentiful, many believe that NYX was the beta-test for a new wave of psychological warfare meant to sedate enemy populations, making them susceptible to conquest. Others say that a person known only as “Sticks” participated in an undocumented trial for the drug and afterwards returned to the facility (rumored to be the University of Montana), liberated their supply and after distributing the drug themself locally for a number of years eventually sold their supply to the highest bidder. Whether either of these theories is even partially true remains to be seen, but one thing is certain; although what many refer to as “The Long Night” has ended, dawn has come and with it a reversal of fate. What happens next remains to be seen.

[jackblogsthings]

Flute and Nature - Healing Meditation

Flute music is used for mindfulness, meditation and relaxation practices. The flute has been found to reduce anxiety and stress, as well increase a sense of well-being. Sacred and/or shamanic music throughout the world is linked to the belief in creation and has been used to heal in earlier cosmologies. These features could help facilitate the integration of trauma-related dissociation that is not requiring invasive intervention, according to this research. Native American Flute Native American Flute (NAF) It is a rim blown wind instrument. The Native American flute (NAF) is composed of two chambers and is tuned on an a pentatonic spectrum. It's a powerful tool to express your self and for healing. The flute is used to conjure images of nature, such as vast canyons and tranquil landscapes. They relate stories to ethnologists who refer to as creation myths. Additionally, playing flute is also associated with yogic breathing technique known as Kapalabhati. The practice involves quick, vigorous exhales as well as passive inhale. It helps cleanse the respiratory system, as well as energizes your body. Research has shown that music from the flute can create feelings of connection and reduces anxiety in people who listen to it. In a study, autonomic as well as EEG indicators were utilized to determine the effect of music in a group of participants. The results showed that flute was able to induce relaxation and an increase in the heart rate variability and alpha waves. It's an intriguing blend of traditional and modern science.

Meditation The soothing sounds of the flute can assist us to relax and relieve tension. The healing energy of the flute can be felt throughout the body as your mind settles. This will enhance your health and well-being. The research has proven that meditation can lower blood pressure, enhances psychological equilibrium and improves resistance to illnesses. With the development of self-control, mindfulness can be an effective instrument to help you conquer life's challenges, including anxiety and depression. In meditation it is important to observe your thoughts without engaging in them. This is exactly the same way exercising your muscles. They get stronger and more powerful automatically. While you are in meditation, your mind can become disoriented, but you should gently return your attention to deep breathing, paying attention to expanding your belly when you breathe in and slowly exhaling. This will help lower stress levels in the brain, decreasing inflammation, and improving cognition. Self-Expression Self-expression can be described as communicating one's inner experiences to the world. It can be accomplished through speech, dance, music and art work or even writing. A person who feels fulfilled with their own expression will create stronger bonds and will feel happier all around. The advantages of self-expression are the release of emotions and catharsis, an increased sense of control, reduced stress levels, and an improved understanding of oneself. The act of self-expression through creativity is also a great way to explore and discover that fuel creativity. The flute, for example, requires a lot of concentration and a lot practice. When a player is fully involved in their playing it is as if they are present and their thoughts are at peace. This can help them lower stress and increase their sleeping quality. The music of the flute also soothes muscles and nerves, which relieves stress. Hence, it is an effective method to lower anxiety and depression. It is also a great way to combat insomnia. A restful night's sleep can lead to improved health and healing. Healing Healing meditation is an example of mindful meditation that makes use of repetitions to create a state of calm. It's a fantastic method to heal physical or mental illnesses. This kind of mediation helps the body to repair and recuperate. It can also help to deal with emotional and psychological triggers. Meditation helps you observe your thoughts and emotions without judgment. This helps you establish a new connection with your thoughts and feelings. You can begin to ease your mind, which will lower stress levels and boost the efficiency of your immune system. Meditation can be beneficial for many issues that range from depression and anxiety to chronic sleep disorders and chronic. You can lose weight or increase your concentration with meditation. Recent research has shown that people who meditated showed increased activity in the hippocampus. This is a part of the brain that is associated with memory and positive mood. This may explain why meditation can be effective in alleviating depression and stress. Watch the video

[auckland-drum-studio]

How Can Drum Lessons Benefit Mental Health and Overall Well-being?

In the realm of music, the drum holds a unique position. Beyond its rhythmic allure and primal appeal, drumming has been increasingly recognised for its profound impact on mental health and overall well-being. 

From reducing stress and anxiety to fostering creativity and enhancing cognitive abilities, the benefits of Auckland drum lessons extend far beyond mere musical proficiency.

Stress Relief

The rhythmic patterns produced during drumming have a calming effect on the mind and body. Engaging in drumming sessions can help reduce levels of cortisol, the stress hormone, thereby alleviating feelings of tension and promoting relaxation.

The repetitive motion of drumming induces a meditative state, allowing individuals to unwind and find solace amidst the chaos of daily life.

Emotional Expression

Drumming provides a powerful outlet for emotional expression. Through the primal beats of the drum, individuals can channel their emotions, whether it be anger, sadness, or joy, in a constructive manner. The act of hitting the drum allows for the release of pent-up emotions, promoting emotional catharsis and fostering a sense of emotional well-being.

Boost in Confidence

Learning to play the drums requires dedication, practice, and perseverance. As individuals progress in their drumming skills, they experience a boost in self-confidence and self-esteem.Mastering new rhythms and techniques instils a sense of accomplishment and pride, empowering individuals to tackle challenges both within and outside the realm of music.

1. Cognitive Enhancement

Drumming engages various cognitive functions, including memory, coordination, and concentration. As individuals learn to coordinate their hands and feet to produce complex rhythms, they enhance their motor skills and spatial awareness. Moreover, the rhythmic patterns in drumming stimulate the brain, improving cognitive function and enhancing neural connectivity.

Social Connection Drumming often occurs in group settings, whether it be in a band, ensemble, or community drum circle. These collaborative Auckland drum lessons experiences foster a sense of belonging and social connection. Drumming transcends language barriers and cultural differences, bringing people together in a shared musical experience. The camaraderie and support found within drumming communities contribute to overall well-being and mental health.

Mindfulness and Presence Drumming requires individuals to be fully present in the moment, attuned to the rhythm and flow of the music. This focus on the present moment cultivates mindfulness, a state of heightened awareness and non-judgmental acceptance. Drumming serves as a form of active meditation, allowing individuals to escape the distractions of the mind and immerse themselves in the sensory experience of playing the drums.

Stress Reduction in Clinical Settings The therapeutic benefits of drumming have been recognised in clinical settings as well. Drumming therapy, also known as drum therapy or rhythm therapy, is increasingly utilised as a complementary treatment for various mental health conditions, including depression, anxiety, and PTSD.

Drumming sessions conducted by trained therapists provide a safe space for individuals to explore and express their emotions, facilitating healing and recovery.

Final Words

The lessons offered by Auckland drum lessons, a myriad of benefits for mental health and overall well-being. From stress relief and emotional expression to cognitive enhancement and social connection, the transformative power of drumming extends to all aspects of life. Whether engaging in drumming as a hobby, a form of therapy, or a professional pursuit, individuals stand to gain both musically and mentally from the rhythmic journey that drum lessons provide. So, pick up those drumsticks, feel the beat, and embark on a path towards greater mental health and well-being through the art of drumming. Source By: How Can Drum Lessons Benefit Mental Health and Overall Well-being?

[orlamount]

Conclusions about grief

How does music typically affect the emotional state of individuals experiencing grief? a) It amplifies feelings of sorrow and despair b) It provides comfort and solace c) It induces anger and frustration d) It has no significant impact on emotional well-being

Which of the following emotions is commonly evoked by music during periods of grief? a) Joy b) Sadness c) Indifference d) Apathy

Research suggests that listening to music during times of grief can: a) Intensify feelings of loneliness b) Help regulate emotions and reduce stress c) Lead to emotional numbness d) Cause agitation and anxiety

How do people often describe the effect of music on their grief experience? a) It deepens their sense of loss b) It provides a sense of connection and understanding c) It creates a distraction from their emotions d) It exacerbates feelings of hopelessness

In what ways can music aid in the grieving process? a) By fostering self-expression and catharsis b) By suppressing emotions and avoiding confrontation c) By promoting isolation and withdrawal d) By encouraging denial and avoidance of reality

When listening to music while grieving, individuals often report feeling: a) Overwhelmed and burdened by their emotions b) Relieved and comforted c) Disconnected and detached from their feelings d) Anxious and unsettled

Which psychological mechanism is commonly associated with the therapeutic effects of music on grief? a) Suppression of emotions b) Emotional regulation and modulation c) Heightened anxiety d) Increased rumination

How does music contribute to the processing of grief in individuals? a) By prolonging the grieving process b) By facilitating emotional expression and release c) By inducing apathy and indifference d) By generating additional stress and tension

Which aspect of music is particularly effective in eliciting emotional responses during grief? a) Rhythmic patterns b) Harmonic structures c) Lyricism and storytelling d) Instrumentation and timbre

What role does music play in fostering connections and support among grieving individuals? a) It isolates individuals further from their support networks b) It facilitates empathy and understanding among peers c) It discourages communication and sharing of emotions d) It promotes competition and comparison between grieving individuals.

[ansiandyou]

Creative Art Therapy: A Transformative Approach to Healing Anxiety and Depression

Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.- Pablo Picasso Introduction: In the realm of mental health treatment, creative art therapy has emerged as a powerful and transformative approach for individuals struggling with anxiety and depression. By harnessing the expressive power of art, this therapeutic modality offers a unique avenue for self-exploration, emotional processing, and healing. In this article, we will delve into the principles of creative art therapy and explore how it can effectively alleviate symptoms of anxiety and depression.

Understanding Creative Art Therapy: Creative art therapy is a form of psychotherapy that utilizes various art modalities, such as painting, drawing, sculpting, and collage, as a means of expression and communication. Rooted in the belief that artistic expression can facilitate psychological growth and healing, creative art therapy provides a safe and supportive space for individuals to explore their emotions, thoughts, and experiences through the creative process. The Therapeutic Process: In a creative art therapy session, individuals are encouraged to engage in artistic activities guided by a trained therapist. Through the act of creating art, clients can externalize internal struggles, release pent-up emotions, and gain insight into their subconscious mind. The therapist serves as a compassionate guide, facilitating self-discovery, and providing support as clients navigate their artistic journey.

Benefits of Creative Art Therapy for Anxiety and Depression: - Emotional Expression and Release: Artistic expression offers a non-verbal outlet for individuals to express and process complex emotions associated with anxiety and depression. Through the act of creating art, clients can externalize their inner turmoil, release pent-up feelings of sadness, fear, or anger, and gain a sense of emotional catharsis. - Self-Exploration and Insight: Engaging in artistic activities encourages individuals to explore their inner world, uncover subconscious thoughts and beliefs, and gain insight into the underlying causes of their anxiety and depression. Artistic expression can reveal hidden patterns, triggers, and unresolved conflicts, paving the way for self-awareness and personal growth. - Stress Reduction and Relaxation: The creative process has been shown to induce a state of relaxation and reduce stress levels, which are often elevated in individuals with anxiety and depression. Immersing oneself in art-making activities promotes mindfulness, fosters a sense of calm, and helps individuals connect with the present moment, alleviating symptoms of anxiety and depression. - Empowerment and Self-Esteem: Engaging in creative expression can empower individuals to take an active role in their healing journey and regain a sense of control over their lives. As clients create art, they experience a sense of mastery and accomplishment, boosting self-esteem and fostering a positive sense of self-worth. - Social Connection and Support: Creative art therapy sessions provide a supportive and non-judgmental environment where individuals can connect with others who share similar struggles. Group-based art therapy offers opportunities for peer support, empathy, and validation, reducing feelings of isolation and fostering a sense of belonging.

Conclusion: Creative art therapy offers a holistic and integrative approach to treating anxiety and depression, addressing the interconnectedness of the mind, body, and spirit. By tapping into the transformative power of artistic expression, individuals can embark on a journey of self-discovery, healing, and personal growth. Whether through painting, drawing, sculpting, or collage, the creative process provides a pathway to inner healing, resilience, and hope for those navigating the challenges of anxiety and depression. Read the full article

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The Magic of Music: How Melodies Can Transform Your Mood

Introduction: Music has a unique power to touch our souls, evoke emotions, and transport us to different realms. Whether it’s the lilting notes of a piano, the rhythmic beats of a drum, or the enchanting melodies of a violin, music has a profound impact on our mood and well-being. In this article, we will explore the magical effects of music on our emotions, and how melodies can transform our mood for the better.

The Science of Music and Emotions: Music and emotions have a deep-rooted connection that goes beyond personal preferences. Research has shown that music activates various regions of the brain associated with emotions, memory, and reward. Neurotransmitters like dopamine and endorphins are released when we listen to music, creating feelings of pleasure and happiness. Understanding this scientific basis helps us appreciate the magical power of music to alter our mood.

Enhancing Positivity with Uplifting Melodies: When we’re feeling down or stressed, uplifting melodies can work wonders in lifting our spirits. Upbeat songs with catchy rhythms and positive lyrics have a way of energizing us and instilling a sense of optimism. Whether it’s a pop song with a catchy chorus or an uplifting classical composition, these melodies have the power to shift our focus and bring positivity into our lives.

Finding Solace in Melancholic Melodies: While upbeat music can uplift our mood, melancholic melodies have their own unique magic. Sometimes, we need to embrace our sadness and allow ourselves to feel deeply. Melancholic music can provide solace and a sense of catharsis, allowing us to process our emotions and find comfort in shared experiences. It’s a reminder that we’re not alone in our struggles, and that there is beauty in embracing our vulnerabilities.

Unleashing Creativity and Productivity: Music has long been recognized as a catalyst for creativity. Whether you’re an artist, writer, or simply looking for inspiration, the right melodies can unlock your creative potential. Studies have shown that background music, particularly instrumental tracks, can enhance cognitive abilities, improve focus, and increase productivity. So the next time you need an extra boost of creativity, try turning on some music and let the melodies guide your mind.

Music as a Stress Buster: In today’s fast-paced world, stress has become an inevitable part of our lives. Fortunately, music can serve as a powerful stress buster. Slow, calming melodies can help lower our heart rate and induce relaxation. Classical compositions, ambient music, or nature sounds have been found to be particularly effective in reducing stress and anxiety. So whenever you find yourself overwhelmed, take a break, put on some soothing music, and let the melodies wash away your worries.

Music as a Form of Self-Expression: Sometimes, words fail to express our deepest emotions. In such moments, music becomes a medium of self-expression. Whether you’re playing an instrument, singing, or simply listening to music that resonates with you, it allows you to convey your emotions without the need for words. Music becomes your voice, your outlet, and your sanctuary, allowing you to connect with yourself and others on a profound level.

Music as a Social Connector: Music has a remarkable ability to bring people together. It transcends language barriers, cultural differences, and societal divides. Shared musical experiences create a sense of belonging and foster social connections. Whether it’s singing along with friends at a concert or dancing to the rhythm of a lively tune, music has the power to unite people and create lasting bonds.

The Therapeutic Power of Music: Music therapy is a recognized form of therapy that utilizes the healing power of music to address various physical, emotional, and mental health issues. From reducing pain and anxiety in hospital settings to helping individuals with autism improve their social skills, music therapy has shown remarkable results. It highlights the immense potential of music to heal and transform lives.

Incorporating Music into Your Daily Life: Now that we understand the magic of music, it’s essential to incorporate it into our daily lives intentionally. Create personalized playlists for different moods, explore new genres, attend live performances, or learn to play an instrument. Experimentation is key to discovering the melodies that resonate with you the most. By embracing music as an integral part of our lives, we can harness its transformative power and experience the joy and healing it brings.

Conclusion: The magic of music lies in its ability to touch our souls and transform our mood. Whether it’s the euphoria of an upbeat melody or the solace found in melancholic tunes, music has the power to evoke a range of emotions and enhance our well-being. By embracing music consciously and incorporating it into our daily lives, we can unlock its transformative potential and experience the profound joy it brings. So, let the melodies guide you, and allow the magic of music to unfold in your life.

[harmonyhealinghub]

The Healing Power of Sound: Unleashing the Harmonious Symphony Within

Shaina Tranquilino

August 24, 2023

Where stress and anxiety have become an integral part of our daily lives, finding solace and healing methods is more important than ever. While traditional practices like meditation and yoga have gained popularity, another age-old technique has been making waves in the realm of holistic wellness - sound healing. This alternative therapy utilizes the power of sound vibrations to restore harmony within the body, mind, and soul. In this blog post, we will delve into the fascinating realm of sound healing and explore its profound effects on our overall well-being.

The Origins of Sound Healing:

Sound healing can be traced back thousands of years to ancient civilizations such as Egypt, Greece, India, and China. These cultures recognized that sound had transformative properties capable of restoring balance in individuals suffering from physical or emotional ailments. Indigenous tribes also employed rhythmic drumming or chanting as a means to enter deep states of relaxation or spiritual connection.

How Does It Work?

At its core, sound healing operates under the principle that everything in existence vibrates at a specific frequency. When we experience illness or disharmony, it is an indication that certain areas within us are vibrating out of sync. By introducing different tones and frequencies through various instruments such as singing bowls, gongs, tuning forks, or even one's voice, sound healers aim to recalibrate these imbalances.

Benefits of Sound Healing:

1. Stress Reduction: Sound healing induces a state of deep relaxation by activating the parasympathetic nervous system. As soothing sounds wash over us during a session, stress hormones decrease while feel-good chemicals like endorphins increase.

2. Emotional Release: Sound vibrations can penetrate deeply into our emotional being, helping us release stored trauma or negative emotions held within our bodies. Many practitioners report feelings of catharsis or increased emotional clarity after sessions.

3. Enhanced Well-being: Sound healing promotes a sense of overall well-being and vitality. Regular sessions have been noted to boost the immune system, improve sleep quality, alleviate chronic pain, and enhance cognitive function.

4. Spiritual Connection: Sound has long been considered a powerful tool for spiritual exploration. By attuning our vibrations with specific frequencies, sound healing can facilitate profound meditative experiences or help individuals connect with their inner selves on a deeper level.

Exploring Sound Healing Techniques:

1. Tuning Forks: These precision instruments emit pure tones when struck against a surface. They are often placed on specific acupuncture points or around the body to promote energy flow and balance.

2. Singing Bowls: Originating from Tibetan traditions, these bowls produce harmonious sounds when played using a mallet in a circular motion around the rim. The reverberations can be deeply calming and grounding.

3. Gong Baths: A gong bath involves lying down while being immersed in the resonant sound waves produced by large gongs. This experience is believed to induce deep states of relaxation and promote energetic cleansing.

Sound healing offers an extraordinary journey into self-discovery and holistic wellness through its transformative power of vibrational therapy. Whether you seek stress relief, emotional release, physical rejuvenation, or spiritual connection, this ancient practice holds immense potential for restoring harmony within your mind, body, and soul. So why not give yourself permission to embark on this sonic voyage and allow the symphony of sound to heal your being?

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Unity in Sound: The Mental Health Benefits of Live Music by Gary Dranow

“Within the symphony of a live concert, each heartbeat synchronizes, and every soul connects.”

There's an ineffable magic to live music, a spell that binds thousands in shared euphoria. The blare of amplifiers, the hypnotic dance of stage lights, and the unison of voices singing along; it's not just an auditory treat but a balm for the soul. As we delve into this, it's worth noting how this communion of sound fosters mental well-being, and why, perhaps, it's the therapy many didn't know they needed.

1. The Shared Rhythm: Unity Beyond Sound

Attending a live concert isn't merely about listening; it's about being part of a collective. This sense of belonging, of being 'one' amidst the crowd, works wonders:

Diminishing Loneliness: Concerts create a space where people, regardless of backgrounds, unite under the banner of music.

Strengthening Social Bonds: Shared experiences, like swaying to a favorite band or artist, forge stronger ties with friends and fellow concert-goers.

2. Catharsis on the Dance Floor

The Greek term 'catharsis' means purging or cleansing. Live concerts provide:

Emotional Release: That spine-chilling moment when the crowd belts out a song's chorus? It's an outlet for pent-up emotions.

Facing Personal Demons: Music can mirror our innermost battles. Live renditions, especially, can help confront and heal emotional wounds.

3. The Neurological Concerto

The thrill of live music isn't just psychological; it's neurological:

Boosting Dopamine: Live music stimulates the release of dopamine, our brain's 'feel-good' neurotransmitter, elevating mood and energy.

Stress Reduction: Engaging in the communal experience of a concert can lower cortisol levels, alleviating stress and inducing relaxation.

4. The Afterglow: Long-term Benefits

The concert might end, but its benefits linger:

Enhanced Memory Formation: Concerts, being sensory-rich experiences, are etched vividly in memory, becoming cherished moments to look back upon.

Elevated Mood: The euphoria of live music can leave attendees feeling rejuvenated and uplifted for days or even weeks.

Strengthened Immunity: Believe it or not, studies have shown that the positive feelings and reduced stress from such experiences can bolster the immune system.

5. Virtual Concerts: A New Age Elixir

The recent rise of virtual concerts, while different, carries its own set of mental health benefits:

Accessibility: For those unable to attend in person, virtual concerts break barriers, ensuring that the magic of live music remains inclusive.

Safety and Comfort: For individuals with anxiety or PTSD, virtual concerts offer the experience without potential triggers of crowded spaces.

Conclusion

In a world increasingly fragmented by screens and individual pursuits, live music emerges as a beacon of unity and emotional liberation. Whether we're in the front row, basking in the sonic power, or humming along from our homes' comfort, the concert experience remains a testament to music's unparalleled power to heal, connect, and elevate.

Here's to many more encores,

Gary Dranow.

[healingguide]

The Healing Harmony of Sound Therapy: Unveiling Profound Sound Therapy Benefits

In an increasingly hectic world, the ancient art of sound therapy emerges as a soothing balm for our weary souls. Spanning cultures and traditions, sound therapy has gained renewed recognition as a holistic approach to cultivating mental, emotional, and physical well-being. This comprehensive exploration delves into the remarkable sound therapy benefits, unveiling its potential to restore harmony and enhance our overall quality of life.

The Therapeutic Symphony of Sound

At the heart of sound therapy lies the principle that vibrations permeate the fabric of existence, resonating within every facet of our being. These vibrations extend to our bodies, emotions, and thoughts, creating an intricate tapestry that profoundly influences our health. By harnessing the power of sound frequencies, sound therapy aims to realign and harmonize these vibrational patterns. Sound therapy encompasses a range of techniques, each offering unique therapeutic effects:

Tuning Forks: Precision-engineered metal forks emit specific frequencies that recalibrate our energy pathways, promoting relaxation and balance.

Crystal Singing Bowls: Emitting ethereal tones, crystal singing bowls have a transformative impact on our energy centers, facilitating the flow of vital energy and inner alignment.

Gong Baths: The resonant echoes of gongs lead participants on a sensory journey, inducing meditative states and the release of tension.

Voice and Chanting: Vocal toning and chanting create distinctive vibrations that resonate within, dissolving blockages and promoting emotional catharsis.

Binaural Beats: By leveraging binaural beats – playing slightly different frequencies in each ear – sound therapy synchronizes brainwave patterns, enhancing focus, relaxation, and sleep quality.

The Enriching Benefits of Sound Therapy

Stress Reduction and Relaxation: Sound therapy effortlessly induces deep relaxation, serving as a powerful antidote to stress and anxiety. The tranquil vibrations have the capacity to quiet the mind and evoke a sense of serenity.

Pain Management: The therapeutic effects of sound therapy trigger the release of endorphins, activating the body's innate healing mechanisms and providing relief from pain.

Enhanced Mental Clarity: Targeted sound frequencies can evoke brainwave patterns associated with heightened mental clarity, creativity, and focus.

Emotional Liberation: Sound therapy serves as a conduit for the release of suppressed emotions and trauma, facilitating profound emotional healing.

Improved Sleep Quality: Regular sound therapy sessions contribute to regulating sleep patterns, creating a relaxed mental state conducive to restful slumber.

Balancing Energy Centers: The strategic application of vibrational frequencies in sound therapy can harmonize the body's energy centers, fostering holistic well-being.

Strengthened Immune System: Sound therapy's potential to stimulate the immune system reinforces the body's natural defense mechanisms, promoting overall health.

Experience Sound Therapy with Vibrantly Balanced

As you embark on your journey into the realm of sound therapy, consider the offerings of Vibrantly Balanced as your guiding light. Committed to nurturing well-being through the transformative power of sound, Vibrantly Balanced provides an array of sound therapy services customized to individual needs. Their skilled practitioners draw from the ancient wisdom of sound therapy to facilitate balance and vitality in your life.

Vibrantly Balanced Services:

From immersive sound therapy workshops that demystify the art and science behind these practices, to personalized sessions tailored to address your unique concerns, Vibrantly Balanced offers a holistic approach to sound therapy. Explore the harmonious interplay of sound and healing at www.vibrantlybalanced.org and embark on a transformative journey towards optimal well-being. Embrace the healing potential of sound and embark on a profound journey of self-discovery and growth.

Conclusion

Sound therapy beckons as a sanctuary of tranquility and healing, offering respite from the clamor of modern existence. With its diverse benefits ranging from stress alleviation to emotional release, sound therapy stands as an avenue to reconnect with ourselves on a profound level. Vibrantly Balanced, with its dedication to sound therapy, serves as a beacon of guidance and transformation on this journey. Delve into their offerings at www.vibrantlybalanced.org and immerse yourself in the world of harmonious vibrations, where healing and well-being converge.

FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions):

1. What is sound therapy?

Sound therapy is a holistic practice that employs specific sound frequencies to influence the body, mind, and emotions. It is based on the belief that vibrations have the power to restore balance and promote well-being.

2. How does sound therapy work?

Sound therapy works by using various techniques, such as crystal singing bowls, gong baths, tuning forks, and binaural beats, to introduce specific vibrations into the body. These vibrations can impact brainwave patterns, inducing relaxation, stress reduction, and emotional release.

3. What are the benefits of sound therapy?

Sound therapy offers a wide range of benefits, including stress reduction, pain relief, improved sleep quality, enhanced mental clarity, emotional healing, chakra balancing, and immune system support.

4. How often should I engage in sound therapy sessions?

The frequency of sound therapy sessions varies depending on individual needs and goals. Some individuals may find regular sessions beneficial for ongoing support, while others may opt for occasional sessions for relaxation and rejuvenation.

5. Is sound therapy suitable for everyone?

Sound therapy is generally safe and suitable for most individuals. However, individuals with certain medical conditions or sensitivities should consult with a healthcare professional before participating in sound therapy sessions.

6. What is Vibrantly Balanced?

Vibrantly Balanced is a leading practitioner of sound therapy, offering a range of services including workshops, personalized sessions, and group experiences. Their mission is to promote holistic well-being and transformation through the therapeutic power of sound.

7. How can I learn more about sound therapy and Vibrantly Balanced?To deepen your understanding of sound therapy and explore the offerings of Vibrantly Balanced, visit their website at www.vibrantlybalanced.org. There, you can access resources, workshops, and sessions designed to guide you on your journey towards improved well-being through the harmonious interplay of sound and healing.

[tiannasfanfic]

Catharsis: Chapter 3

Adrian Chase/Vigilante x Reader

Story Summary: Based on true events, a reader insert story. An abusive relationship has finally ended for reader, but the ex soon turns into a stalker. While you're trying to deal with it on your own, your coworkers can tell something is up.

Author Notes: I am posting Chapter 3 and Chapter 4 at the same time so it doesn't leave you all on an anxiety inducing cliffhanger. It gets heavy in these two chapters.

Chapter Word Count: 2,345 (Not sure how I managed that one.😆)

Tag List (comment to be added): @pansinspace @uncle-eggy

CW: Psychological abuse and stalking.

Chapter 3: (Crossposted to AO3)

It was a free weekend for the team. The last mission went off without a hitch and had wrapped up nicely, so no overtime to do additional paperwork had been needed. The debrief on the new mission wasn’t for another week, provided nothing came up between now and then. It was a rare occurrence, a free weekend followed by an easy week. Rather than make any plans together, everyone decided to do their own thing. Most Saturday evenings, the team usually went out together to their favorite hangout, O’Rourke’s Sports Bar. You hadn’t started going with them yet since the breakup, though you did plan on it once everything with your ex was finally done and settled. You didn’t go before the breakup because…well, the one time you did go, you learned it was just easier to stay at home. You ex preferred you to be at home so he could ignore you rather than you go out and possibly have fun.

On weekends when there was no team outing, everyone ended up posting to the group chat frequently throughout the day. After your first ninety days were up and you hadn’t run away screaming yet, Harcourt had added you to the 11th Street Kids chat. John explained the significance of it to you since that was before your time with them had started. That was your official herald that you were now a part of the team. Usually, you contributed to chat just as much as anyone else did. Not today though. You had been up ever since 3am that morning due to your ex texting you. Since you were technically always on call, you couldn’t put your phone on silent. He knew this and abused this knowledge. The difference this morning was, he immediately started in about getting his stuff. Not to set a day or time, though. No, of course not. Now it was, if you didn’t let him get his stuff, he would bring out the sheriff to make you give it back. He was working the angle with you now, not just to your friends, that it was YOU keeping him from getting his stuff, not the fact he just flat out would not do it. You spent several hours fighting with him over text about the whole thing. By the time the group chat started getting active as everyone was going about their day, you were silent.

Adrian noticed this. Adrian noticed a lot more than people gave him credit for and he liked to keep it that way. He had been watching you closer ever since that morning at your apartment. He didn’t know what his gut was trying to tell him, but something was off, way off, and he didn’t like it. One day, he had noticed Harcourt watching you closely, too. Harcourt had also noticed him noticing her watching you and gave a small shake of her head in his direction. He took that to mean “just keep an eye on Y/N” and gave Harcourt a thumbs up showing he understood. He had already planned on that anyway. In all reality, Harcourt actually thought Adrian was about to go bug you and was telling him not to. This ended up being a very good miscommunication later on.

After Leota sent some cute pictures of her dogs to everyone late that morning and it got absolutely no reaction from you, Adrian knew for sure something was wrong. You always, ALWAYS responded to pictures of the fur babies and the feathery baby. By the time he clocked out from his mid shift at Fennel Fields, there was still nothing from you in there. So, he sent you a text directly.

Meanwhile, you had managed to fall back asleep around eleven and slept until midafternoon. You still were living mostly upstairs aside from when you slept. That extra security of being on the couch and knowing you would instantly hear it if someone tried to get in was the only way you were getting any sleep now. Though, it had finally dawned on you that you could move your PS4 downstairs to your big TV. You could start enjoying your living room again. But, before you did that, you wanted to clean first. Plus, if your ex really did decide to show up with the sheriff, you figured it would look better for you if the house was clean.

Starting around the tv, you got through the stacks of mail that had piled up easily enough. This was a leftover of your ex’s habits. For whatever reason, he’d drop the mail on the entertainment center and wouldn’t touch it again, yet would gripe if you tried to go through it. You couldn’t even see the glass top anymore, there was so much mail piled on it. So, anything with your ex’s name got thrown away, along with any junk mail. That took care of the bulk of it. The rest of the living room, on the other hand, was a disaster you didn’t even know existed.

When you had started picking up the trash your ex had left around on the tables, you discovered hidden piles of it shoved under the couches. It was an accidental discovery. You had knocked an empty soda bottle off the table, and it went under the couch. That’s when you actually felt under the couch and realized it wasn’t the only thing under there. Empty cans, bottles, snack food packages, even bits of rotting food. No wonder the roaches had been so bad downstairs. While all apartments had roaches and yours was no exception, they had been particularly bad in the living room for months. Your ex had always blamed the neighbors. And it also explained the nasty smell you had been complaining about downstairs for months, the smell your ex also blamed on the neighbors. But no, as it turned out, the neighbors were innocent. You had just been living with a pig this entire time and didn’t realize exactly how trashy he was until now.

It was too much. Too much hit all at once.

You were laying on your bed with your eyes closed when Adrian’s text came in. Your eyes and head hurt after angry crying over the discovery. You no idea how long you had been crying for, but now you were tense and so tired. At first, you were just going to ignore the text, not knowing who it was since it was your generic text tone. Outside of group chat, you rarely texted with any of them one on one enough to merit their own tones. You didn’t especially feel like talking to anybody and intended on possibly laying there until you went back to sleep. While you didn’t like being so far away from the front door, being in the living room disgusted you now. Then another text came in. Then another. You finally looked at your phone out of curiosity and blinked, seeing another one come in, followed quickly by the last one.

“Hey Y/N! I just wanted to see if you were okay since you’ve been really quiet in chat today. You’re usually way more talkative.”

“Not like I was waiting for you to send messages to us or react to anything, which I wasn’t.”

“And I hope you didn’t take Chris seriously the other day. I totally wasn’t hitting on you! I didn’t even know you were single until he said that.”

“Sorry!”

And then the last one was three of the merman emoji. It made you crack a small smile. You let your fingers do the talking without putting any thought into what you were saying. You were too tired to lie.

“I’m not really. It’s been a bad day.”

His reply came within seconds.

“I just got off work. Do you need me to come over???”

Being alone for the evening didn’t sound appealing anymore. Not after your breakdown, at least. You missed just hanging out with people. You had way fewer friends now thanks to all of this unnecessary drama, but it was easy to think at that point you didn’t have any at all. So, you hadn’t even thought to reach out to anyone. But here was someone who still wanted to be around you. For right now, at least. Adrian didn’t think you were a terrible person or some kind of monster yet, so might as well enjoy his company while he still liked you. At this point, your mind was so beaten down you thought that would be the inevitable conclusion. All the good people leave, so you were also starting to think your ex was right and you didn’t deserve to have good people in your life. There was no doubt in your mind that Adrian was a good man. He fell into a dark gray area of morality, yes, but he was fundamentally good. And that just naturally meant he wouldn’t stick around you for too long.

You got up off the bed as you typed your response.

“Yes.”

“Be there in about an hour.”

While you waited on him, you finally went back downstairs and resumed picking up. You hadn’t gotten very far when your breakdown hit, but it seemed easier now that you knew someone was coming over. Your body went on cleaning autopilot. You had one trash bag almost full by the time Adrian got there. It is worth noting at this point that you didn’t use normal kitchen trash bags. While you had a standard sized kitchen trash can, you hated the trash bags that were the correct size. You liked the extra room and durability lawn bags provided better. So, these were the heavy duty, thirty-gallon trash bags you normally see people use while doing yard work. And you had one filled with the trash your ex had had shoved under ONE of your two couches.

Once Adrian arrived, you saw why it took him an hour to get there. Fennel Fields was only about fifteen minutes away from your place, depending on traffic. But he had stopped by his house to change out of his Fennel Fields uniform and grab his Vigilante Bag, plus he also stopped by Little Caesars. The smell of pizza and Crazy Bread reminded you that you hadn’t eaten at all that day.

“Why the Vigilante Bag?” you asked, eyeing it as he was setting the pizza down.

Adrian shrugged. “I’d rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it.”

It was sound logic. And you can’t say it didn’t add an extra layer to your relief that his presence currently brought. You knew it wasn’t only his uniform he had in that bag.

“What happened in there?” he gestured out to the living room.

“Leftovers of my ex, apparently,” you said, bitterly. “Guess he thought there was a trash can under the couch.”

Adrian got a very confused look on his face. “That’s a weird place to keep a trash can. Why would he think that?”

“No, not literally,” you said, with a small chuckle. “But he shoved all of his trash under there like there was one. I’ve found all sorts of shit under there. Candy wrappers, cans, food. Everything. Even a half-eaten taco in a Taco Bell wrapper.”

“That’s fucking disgusting,” Adrian said, wrinkling his nose.

While the two of you ate at the table, he told you about his day at the restaurant. It sounded like an average Saturday, but he told you everything in a way that made you laugh. Between that and just his company in general, the stress of the day didn’t seem so bad anymore. When Adrian asked about your day, you glossed over the argument with your ex that morning, focusing on how you were planning on cleaning, getting rid of his bad energy, and retaking back your living room. You were excited at the idea of getting to play games on your nice TV again.

Once you both had finished eating, Adrian wouldn’t take no for an answer when it came to helping you clean. You didn’t protest this time. At that point you were just ready for it to be done, no matter who did it. A little bit before ten, the trash was all bagged and in the dumpster. Between the living room, kitchen, and the downstairs half bathroom, you both had taken three and a half garbage bags of trash out of your house. And that was all trash your ex had just shoved or set in random places rather than throwing it away.

“Headed out soon for patrol?” you asked after you had vacuumed and he helped you move the last of your furniture back where it went. Except the recliner, of course.

“Nah,” he said. “I’m off tomorrow, so I planned on hanging out for a while.”

“Wanna get drunk and watch bad horror movies then?” you grinned. "I kinda want to. You can crash on my couch.”

“Sure!” Adrian seemed excited by the idea.

There wasn’t any alcohol in your house currently, so the two of you walked to the small convenience store on the corner just down the street from your place. It was a nice night, which was why you suggested walking. You used to walk up there all the time prior to being stalked. It was nice getting to do that again, just meandering around outside with no particular hurry to get anywhere. The most either of you could afford was a case of the really cheap beer, but it would still get the job done. Adrian carried it on the way back.

When you both got back to the parking lot outside our place, you noticed a white truck parked two spaces away from the Sebring. When the door of the truck opened and the person inside got out, everything suddenly clicked. You realized what you were seeing, and everything was suddenly in slow motion as your stomach felt like it hit the ground,

It was your ex getting out of the truck, and he was looking at the two of you with a look of pure, unadulterated rage.