I'm sorry, but if you deny you're gay and then five minutes later say "this one has a huge doll collection back home" they're just going to think you're in the closet. I'm not saying that's fair, but heteros in 2007 were not super adept at sexuality nuance. Antiquers indeed.
One day you think: I want to die. And then you think, very quietly, actually I want a coffee. I want a nap. A sandwich. A book. And I want to die turns day by day into I want to go home, I want to walk in the woods, I want to see my friends, I want to sit in the sun. I want a cleaner room, I want a better job, I want to live somewhere else, I want to live.