#anon you're so real for this one
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the little vistigial wings that tieflings have, the sharp little bony growths that cone out of them. they drive me crazy. i wanna trace them with my fingers
YEAH!!!! These bad boys drive me wild!
The patterns are so mesmerising. I agree anon, lovely spot to trace around with your fingertips 😍 Prime spot to clutch for grip while you're going at it with your favorite Tiefling, too
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Elbaf saga better be a 100 chapter long Usopp and Sanji make out session or I stop reading
I confirm it will be an extremely long Usopp-centered arc with Sanji supporting him wholeheartedly in his path of becoming a warrior and then it will end with both of them kissing because they're in their own fairytale and nobody can hurt them there
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hi people can see your tags!! i know we like to talk about how 'safe' screaming in the tags feels and to an extent it is safe, indirect communication. but it is communication and the OP is very likely to see them. if its not something you'd say to them don't put it in the tags, maybe. (:
#OOC#I do not understand some of you#if you don't like something why reblog it just to say how much you don't like it?????#Do you need attention that badly that you're gonna tear someone's hard work down??????????????????????#Don't answer that I don't care#It costs 0 dollars to not be an asshole and some of you are in asshole debt so bad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#a real live person worked on that art/gpose/writing#and you reblogged it SOLEY to say how much you didn't like it???? that's!!! wild!!!!!!!!!!!#I still remember every weird or mean tag I've ever gotten so maybe just don't#why spend any energy on engaging with something you don't like i cannot fathom that!!!!!!!#pathetic behavior.#no one has done this to me recently and much like any weird anons I get i just#block them and move on#but I've been seeing some MEAN tags lately in reblogs and like#what the FUCK#here i go again asking people to have some self reflection (':
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i would literally eat karinas entire female reproductive system like it's gummies, slurp the fallopian tubes like it's SPAGHETTI 🍝
i want karina to put one finger in my pussy and another in my asshole and throw me like a bowling ball 🎳 ✍
i have 1 vagina, 1 anus, 1 mouth, 2 hands. i have 4 holes. for you. always you. AESPA ❤️. ✍
i wanna spin around on karinas strap like a basketball ✍
i would literally eat karinas entire female reproductive system like it's gummies, slurp the fallopian tubes like it's SPAGHETTI 🍝
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Hii!! so i just want to say first that i love love the way you write dmc fanfics. The way you just understand them, makes all their action seem like something they'd do. And well, if it doesn't bother you, may I ask a few advices on how to write Vergil, young and current? I'm trying to write a story and I think your input would be very helpful since you're probably the most accurate Vergil writer there is. Thank you andI just want to say that your fics helped me out a lot mentally. Thank you for bringing the characters to life 🫶
You just left me floored, loved to death, giggling like a 7 year old in public, and I thank you wholeheartedly for that 🖤🖤
First of all, thank you SO much for your words - and wow, I am absurdly flattered that you think so highly of me as a writer, really! I mean, I'm just writing my crazy shenanigans here, I don't expect much hahahaha words like yours make my day and, honestly, you made my whole week!
I am SO happy what I write helped you mentally. I do write to help myself in that regard too, and seeing I was able to have an impact on someone else, it makes everything worth it. That's what Dante would have wanted :')
Asking me for advice doesn't bother me AT ALL! Feel free to ask anytime you want it - by all means I see myself as someone so good as to give advice, but I've gained some experience and it's always good to share! Maybe I'll say something that makes sense to you!
So, without further ado, a few advices on writing Vergil - young and current - down the cut 'cause I haven't written it yet, but knowing myself, I know it's gonna be big :)
(spoiler: it's huge *puts on fool hat and jingles away*)
I sprinkled some things here and there about Dante and Vergil on this blog, but I think it'll be nice putting it all together in one place!
I recently got an ask about which MBTI personality I think it's Dante and Vergil, and there's a LOT on BOTH of their characters in there. You can find it here.
(I won't repeat the things I wrote there, 'cause oh boy this one's got bigger than I expected)
But oh, Verge, this little emotionally constipated goth man *sighs* he's Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. I'm not even joking.
But all of that aside, I do keep a few things in mind when writing him. I've said before I have many similar personality traits with him and I think it makes it easier for me to write this little bitch (affectionate).
Vergil is pretty much shaped by his trauma. You could argue Dante is as well, but differently from his twin brother, Vergil never really found acceptance. Yes, the twins lived through the same thing but the fact that Eva managed to save Dante and not Vergil is crucial to both characters.
Dante has survivor's guilt and depression from all that happened. He can't keep a deep connection to save his life, 'cause he keeps everyone at bay - he thinks his demonic blood is a curse and he is the reason everyone perishes. So it's best if people keep away from him.
But even with that, Dante loves being around people. It's what makes him so fond of his human part and, in my opinion, it's what made Dante healthier than Vergil. He seeks connection and humanity, he wants to use his strength to protect the weak - like Eva once used hers and sacrificed herself to protect and save him. That is crucial to Dante's character.
Vergil, in the other hand, believed for a LONG time he was left for dead. That his mother chose to save his brother because she loved Dante more and Vergil was left to die. He was left all alone in the cold, in a cemetery filled with demons who slaughtered him in quite a gruesome manner. If he hadn't find the rage, strength and power inside of himself that day, he wouldn't have survived.
Vergil learned he is on his own, his own family didn't love him (even if he was wrong, that's the impression he had for a LONG time) and the only one he could count on was himself. That made him withdraw completely: be wary of people and their intentions, shut himself to the world, allow only strength and power to come through his personality and keep his vulnerabilities and feelings shut down in the darkest and most protected place of himself because if he didn't, that could be his death.
Vergil didn't learn to protect the weak, because he wasn't protected when he was weak. He learned to survive, because when he needed the most, no one was there and his own will was the only thing that could save him. If he had given up, he would've died - no one would come, no knight in shiny armor, no powerful protecting demon, no sacrificing loving human mother.
✨That's why he's an asshole✨
Hahahaha jokes aside, that's why he's so laser focused on power, I think. When he was younger (around DMC 3), he finds Dante again and there's a hatred for his brother because he believed he was left to die and wasn't loved as much as Dante (as always, our red devil being a clueless himbo who just got lucky to be around Eva, poor guy). He wants to prove he is better than Dante, that he was worth something, that he too was worth saving - even more than his brother.
To some extent, up until that moment in DMC 3, Vergil is better than Dante (regarding power). He's got a lot of knowledge and control over his demonic heritage, things Dante didn't even know he could do. But Vergil is so blinded by his hurt and in so much pain he can only deem himself worthy if he beats Dante down, if he wins, if he gets all the power in the world.
I don't think he ever wanted to kill Dante - he just wanted to win. Like a kid, going "see, mom, dad, I win, I'm worth as much as Dante!!" - quite tragic, really.
With his power thing, it's not a desire for power for it's own sake, but as an armor. Given everything that happened to him, that Vergil has this thing of "only I can protect myself and I can count only on myself to save my life", it's very understandable that his logic takes him to the path of "if I am the most powerful being in this world, I will never bleed and I will never hurt again".
So, even if he says on the outside he is power hungry because he wants to honor his demonic heritage and humans are weak, on the inside it's actually that he's trying to carve his heart out from himself so he won't feel nothing and stop hurting - as well as gain all the power he can so NO ONE can make him feel scared, vulnerable, weak and powerless like he did that night when no one appeared to help him.
Vergil hides his pain under a mask of cruelty and hubris - since being honest means being vulnerable to him and that is something he's got a deep aversion to.
Current Verge has dragged himself out of Hell in a crumbling body. If Dante hadn't "killed" him as Nelo Angelo, he probably would've never been free of his shackles with Mundus, but once again he was left for dead (even if not intentionally, I know Dante would have gone through all the layers of Hell to bring his brother back, but VERGIL doesn't know that). Once again, Vergil had to muster all his will, his power, his demonic heritage to drag himself out of that godforsaken place.
He didn't know Nero was his son, he just took Yamato back 'cause he didn't really had time to explain everything that was going on. Vergil was on the brink of death, it's not like he could think logically about everything he was doing and weight pros and cons. He needed to survive. That's what he does.
It's only when he separated his human and demon parts that he came to realize a bunch of things - because Vergil never really had time to do anything else other than surviving; and thinking too much, going over your feelings and past trauma, doesn't do anything good when you're stuck in survival mode (been there, done that).
After he gets both of his parts together and goes back to being Vergil, he knows a lot more than he did before, because V allowed his heart to feel and to process all that pain he didn't allow himself to process before - because if he did, he would probably break, like V himself was falling to pieces.
He knows his mother loved him. He knows it wasn't Dante's fault. He knows it was all a tragedy and no one is to blame - he knows he wasn't left there to die: Eva died trying to get to him. It honestly changes everything he's been thinking for the past 40 (if I'm not wrong...?) years.
That's why he wonders, if he was in Dante's place all those years ago, would that change something? And honestly, it probably would. Because everything Vergil did was from a wound he couldn't bring himself to heal from that fateful night.
Therefore, current Vergil is a lot more accepting to his feelings - but internally only, he won't let it show. He also understands his thing of wanting to surpass Dante wasn't his brother's fault and it's something he has to work on.
Not saying he won't be a little bitch sparring with Dante all the time and keeping score over stupid stuff, because that's EXACTLY how these two function - but now Vergil is fueled by healthy sibling rivalry and fun instead of inferiority complex and pain/hatred.
Vergil's path is a lot similar to Anakin from Star Wars: fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate and hate leads to the Dark Side of the Force. If the Jedi Council had understood Anakin's upbringing as a slave, his deep love for his mother - and for all the beings on the Universe, I argue, because he did want to become a Jedi to free all slaves - his overflowing empathy, his deep feelings, his love for Padmé, etc., Anakin wouldn't find himself vulnerable to the grooming of an older man who saw all this and took the opportunity to twist it all to make him feel pain, fear, anger and hate.
If Qui-Gon Jin had trained Anakin he would've never turned to the Dark Side, I will DIE on this hill and fight EVERYONE, even if I love Obi-Wan
Star Wars ramblings aside, that's Vergil in a nutshell. And I think with him older, currently, he can finally see all of that, because he had a chance to be just demonic, as Urizen, and just human, as V - noticing how everything that happened to him shaped him to feel pain, fear, anger and hate, doing desperate things to protect himself and feel safe.
I argue Vergil hasn't felt safe for a single day in his whole lifetime, and that matters. Because in the end, that's how I write him: a wounded stray dog who knows only pain and hatred from the outside world.
If you try to approach him, he'll first bare his teeth, bark and try to bite you - not because he's mean, but because he's stuck in survival mode and that's his first response to ANYTHING. Just like a wounded stray, you have to approach carefully, offer kindness and show him you're not there to hurt him.
And just like a stray dog, he'll eventually melt and accept that kindness - he just has NO IDEA how that feels like.
✨What about Nero's mother, I hear you ask?✨
Hahahaha so that one I have some doubts myself. I often imagine two scenarios and I still haven't chose one of them to satisfy my heart HAHAHAHA
That might be me projecting, of course, but because of ALL THAT, I don't see Vergil as being open to relationships and one night stands - he takes things too seriously, and that's part of his character.
He either decided to try it out empirically with a one night stand with someone who was kind to him and he wanted to understand that kind of experience to understand himself better and out of curiosity (look, I know this sounds crazy, but that's exactly what I did on my first kiss with a super random guy at a party and I was like "oh, well, that's not for me, I'm gonna stick to kissing people I love, this sucks" and it took a weight off my shoulders)
oooooor he was treated with kindness for the first time in his life and that broke him for a while, he melted under a soft touch and gentle words and couldn't resist trying out new experiences he only had by proxy from his books - and when he woke up next morning, he was reminded how broken he is, how powerless, how not worthy of love not even from his own mother, and left because that would lead to nowhere. Because of him. Because he wasn't worth it - she probably fell for his looks, his heritage, his outside, but when she knew his inside she would run in horror.
Again, Vergil has a lot of issues, the poor man.
When I'm writing Nemesis, we have young Vergil - laser focused on power, proud as fuck, stepping over anything and everything to get what he wants, because life favors the ones who survive. The weak ones should die, that's the law of the jungle and he won't waste his time saving those who can't do it for themselves like he did for himself. When he sees the reader struggling to keep fighting him to protect others, he sees not only Eva, but himself in a will of a survivor who will go through excruciating pain to save themselves. He values that and admires that - admiring the reader as an enemy and having utmost respect.
When he's older, he's trying. And he has a LOT to learn - but his partner has to understand he's the stray dog who knows nothing but harshness. Vergil is quiet, methodical and disciplined, knowing how to live only with himself as company. But now he has a family: he has his brother back, he has a son, he has the whole crew to live alongside him. That's new, harrowing and comforting at the same time.
So, when in doubt, think about how a wounded animal would react - and how you would have to act to be able to approach and help.
Vergil, differently from Dante, is forever stuck in survival mode and has forsaken his humanity so he could keep going. As a younger man, he's ruthless and won't spare efforts to get what he wants because he is desperately trying to not feel vulnerable and worthless as he usually feels. As an older man, he's trying - in his own stupid Mr. Darcy way - to recover, to understand himself better and finally heal that horrible wound in his heart.
But of course. He is still proud, observing, regal and prone to overkill here and there and showing off his skills. These are all inherent to his personality.
(Also. Vergil enjoys some dumb fun sometimes - he only lets it show a tiny little bit when competing with Dante over ANYTHING. If Dante says he can eat a cheeseburger in three bites, Vergil will go above and beyond to eat it in two. Everyone thinks he's just being stupidly competitive with Dante and wants to win against his brother no matter what, but that's just his way of being fun)
Phew! That's quite a lot on the blue devil! Hahaha it isn't everything I keep in mind - of course there are the other things like him being reserved, more on the quiet side, intellectual, methodical, a lover of beauty (like literature, philosophy, poems, etc.), stupidly independent... But I think those traits are more "worldwide" known.
If you take all his trauma and how it affected him into consideration, I think, his personality follows easily. You understand a lot better how he would react in certain situations - in the end, that's what being a writer is all about: creating characters and watching how all of them react to situations given their backgrounds and baggage!
I'm so sorry it's such a HUGE answer, but I do hope it helps. There's a lot to unpack and I didn't want to just "oi, he's a traumatized asshole, that's it" - because you miss the nuances if you just work with that perspective.
Thanks a lot for asking, though, I had fun writing this little essay on Vergil, the man, the myth, the legend HAHAHAHAHAHA
Hope you have a nice weekend and have fun writing!! If you need any advice, even on writing in general, you can always ask me again! As you can see, I'm happy to help and I do love sharing what I know xD
#polaris speaks#asks#answered asks#anon ask#vergil#vergil sparda#character analysis#character breakdown#one hell of a breakdown apparently I had one too while writing this HAHAHAHA#so sorry anon for the essay but like Vergil I don't speak too much in real life but if someone asks me to write OH BOY#I'm only shutting up next month#also I do have a character sheet I downloaded ages ago that I ALWAYS use to create my original characters and stories#it helps a lot to write after filling it up#so if you guys are interested I can share the main topics that help the most when writing/understanding characters#also anon feel free to share your writing with me when you're done!! I'll be happy to see it!
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AHA thank u i was mostly just. frantically pulling the "no hetero" card bc farcille is super super always endgame for me and the "marcille has two hands" thing is absolutely not for me and my personal characterization of marcille
i like. can't find it anymore for some reason but there was a farcille fic set just after the shuro confrontation where laios reaches over to hold marcille's hand and ask her if she likes him or if she's just tolerating him too and it was so. the vulnerability. the puppyness.
that safety and security he must feel in knowing that she wears her heart on her sleeve and he will always know when she's unhappy with him because she will absolutely let it be known. the way that falin's first revival was the turning point for the way he felt about her because, for the first time in his life, protecting falin wasn't something he had to shoulder alone. there was finally someone else who cared about her as much as he did (in his eyes, resenting his parents for failing to protect her) and would stop at nothing to save her. the way it must have been proof for him that, not only was falin not alone anymore, he wasn't alone anymore.
idk why i like rather than dislike the fact that his only framework for parsing how he feels about "the first girl other than his sister that he's ever cared this much about" is a comphet romantic lens. like he would have the autism moment of fully assuming that he's in love with her for a while and just like. not? doing anything about it? because he doesn't feel the urge to, nor is he sad that he knows marcille would mostly likely never "feel the same way" about him?
like. he "figures out" that he's "in love with marcille" with all the passion of printing out a label and sticking it onto a favourite scrapbook for organizational purposes. he's equally happy to be her husband or brother-in-law so long as it means she stays close and is part of his family.
i know logically i should hate it but it's sooo crunchy to me. my comphet besties ever. designated plus one and dance partner to all fancy and formal occasions. having actual real chemistry but the "romantic" part of it is some weird shapeshifter smokescreen. augh
#asks#tunnel anon#screencapped so it doesn't show up in the l*imar tag#anyway don't read these tags if lesbian marcille is your truth. you're real for that and i would never oppose that#but i guess im in the bisexual marcille camp for a couple of reasons (first and foremost being that ryoko kui is like.#a fabulous incredibly likely bisexual and marcille is clearly her Specialest Little Guy so it feels only fair)#so technically laios and marcille “dating” is a possibility in my head but such an insanely depressing one that i don't give it much though#like yeah sure marcille is capable of being attracted to him and even having feelings for him if he pursued her intensely enough#but that's the paradox. he wouldn't.#once again. equally happy to be her husband or brother in law bc he doesn't understand being attracted to women#and dearest marcille needs more than that.#little neurotic dragoness bunny who needs to be desired and wanted with an all-consuming passion#hopeless romantic freakassishly monogamous cringe darling who needs to be “the one” for her partner in order to thrive in a relationship#because she wants to be given as good as she's giving and nothing less (and boy does she give!! she gives her everything!!)#so i vastly prefer her never developing feelings for him bc he never decides to pursue her in a way she can't ignore#over them getting together and her self-esteem taking hit after hit as he demonstrates no romantic passion for her#like yes it's toxic and ridiculous. but let's be so real. if someone blatantly flirted with her and he did nothing and felt nothing#she'd be crying herself to sleep feeling unwanted and unessential and “not even worth getting jealous abt” bc she's Like That.#while he starts to hate himself more and more for not being able to give her what she needs#kissing them on the head and tucking them safely into my personal canon. i could never do that to them.#also marcille being the first and foremost thing that laios and falin “fight” over in a way where falin is finally able to assert herself i#yknow??
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I love seeing people compare music to their favourite characters and go like 'oh yeah this verse might be this character... and then this one is the other one... and then this little bit here is them both honestly. Or something like that' because I HAVE gone through every taylor swift song on evermore and folklore and compared it to skk. Sorry to be autistic on the writing account, but this is a fanfic writing account and I'm writing my second novel length fic about them so what did you expect.
folklore/evermore are very canon skk, and verge into fanon and some songs are the reason for very specific head canons, or some of the ways I write the way they perceive each other. 1989... DON'T GET ME STARTED OMFG HAVE YOU EVER LISTENED TO BLANK SPACE? I THINK IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO NOT HAVE AND OMG IT'S SO SKK CODED LIKE WTF. I HAVE VERY FIRM OPINIONS ABOUT WHICH LYRICS ARE THEIRS. Also the vault tracks literally exist what more do you want from me. 'i think about jumping off of very tall somethings just to see you come running and say the one thing I've been wanting' okay dazai pack it up you did that already, beast exists. 'i call my mom sister she said that it was for the best remind myself the more i gave you'd want me less' yeah yeah chuuya we know he left you get over it, it wasn't personal(think that line could go for either of them but the other line 'the way you faded till i left' feels more Dazai personally). Plus suburban legends. For personal reasons I struggle to listen to song without SPIRALING FUCK YOU THAT ONE PERSON SEHDHSSJNS but very skk as well 'we were born to be national treasures' is very soulmates of them. And out of the woods screams them in fanfic when they try to get better. Red, straight away all too well. They both remember it all too well. All too well skk cover with switching vocals anyone? The last time. The one with gary lightbody. Underrated song, is my favourite on that album, and SO THEM. 'this is the last time you tell me ive got it wrong, this is the last time i wont hurt you anymore' because they're fated to be together and are constantly drawn to each other and yet keep HURTING EACH OTHER RAGH. also 'we are never getting back together' is pretty funny and nice when applied to them. also state of grace. any taylor song with a mild drop of religious imagery is them cause yeah. but 'i never saw you coming, and I'll never be the same'... okay pack it up, we don't have time for your yearning. 'you were never a saint' (dazai abt chuuya) 'and i loved in shades of wrong' (bc hes toxic and doesnt know how to healthily like people) 'we learned to live with the pain, mosaic broken hearts' (bc they continue anyway and stick it out, living with the pain of being bad for each other because of how deeply they care). I almost do. Dazai after leaving. moving on to more religion, holy ground. 'for the first time i had something to lose' 'and i guess we fell apart in the usual way, and the storys got dust on every page' AAAAAA IT'S THEM. Can't really speak on debut- but I've listened to our song and picture to burn and if picture to burn isn't a vengeful chuuya idk what is. BOY OH BOY SPEAK NOW.
excuse me. one moment.
Mine- literally a skk au
Sparks fly- 'the way you move is like a rainstorm and im a house full of cards, you're the kind of reckless that should send me running' that entire verse screams dazai's fascination with corrupted chuuya, and the whole song is well yeah
back to december- dazai when they reunite just trust me on it just trust me on it. the repetition was intentional, that's how serious i am. 'i go back to december all the time' 'I got back to december to make it all right'
speak now- might just be me but it really makes me think of teen skk in fanfic harbouring urges to ruin the others relationship for 'some reason. I don't know, seeing him with her just... irks me'.
the story of us- first verse is chuuya, second verse is dazai, and the third is them both because they're LOSERS and they LOVE EACH OTHER and FUCK I'm CRYING NOW. 'id tell you i miss you but i don't know how' EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED BASTARD.
enchanted- self explanatory. for more context, i really think it's from dazai's pov in this case, could probably be both, but dazai fell first and harder so it's really like god he's been in love ever since he got kicked into that wall he wants him around forever. He held Chuuya's hand in the fight with rimbaud and then had all those close moments in the manga and went home to lie on his bed kicking his feet and giggling don't lie. (god im still crying this isn't helping)
better than revenge- they're both pretty vengeful idk it makes me think of iwsynttr for some reason
haunted- chuuya pov. 'i thought i had you figured out, something's gone terribly wrong' 'stood there and watched you walk away from everything we had' they're so sad, but the general idea of chuuya thinking he has figured out dazai and knowing how he thinks and then dazai just leaves suddenly and he's like 'Wow! I thought i knew you. How do i forget this'. 'wont finish what you started' bringing chuuya into the mafia then leaving it.
last kiss- 'you told me you love me so why did you go away' chuuya pov again oh god it hurts why am i doing this to myself? 'never imagined we'd end like this, your name, forever the name on my lips' yep yep ow.
LONG LIVE.- LISTEN. TO. THE. SONG. AND TELL ME IT'S NOT DAZAI AND CHUUYA. I COULD DO A WHOLE ANALYSIS ON JUST THIS SONG. 'promise me this, that you'll stand by me forever, but if god forbid fate should step in, and force us into a goodbye...please tell them my name, tell them how the crowds went wild, tell them how i hope they shine, long live the walls we crashed through, i had the time of my life with you' FUCK IT'S DAZAI AN HE'S IN LOVE WITH CHUUYA AND DOESNT KNOW ODAS GONNA DIE YET, JUST THINKS HE DOESNT GET TO KEEP ANYTHING HE WANTS. FUUUUUCK. THEY'RE IN LOVE AND DAZAI WANTS IT REMEMBERED PLEASE I'M SO SAD.
anyway, i can't pretend I'm normal about skk anymore i haven't even covered fearless, reputation, lover or midnights please somebody encourage me to actually write full things dedicated to each album and the most fitting songs from said albums please i'll do it and plus i need to actually gather proof for my autism diagnosis appointment so this would be a good way to to that probably. anyway yeah this'll never make it out my drafts lol
#this is finally out of my drafts after months#dedicated to the anon who asked and the one who said abt the fearless song idk if you're the same person but either way love you lots 🤞#i love taylor swift so much#i love skk more#im sorry for this#but the brainrot is real#this was written at like 3am in January#bsd#silas yaps#soukoku#soukoku fanfiction#bsd dazai#bsd chuuya#bungou stray dogs#taylor swift
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I noticed something in a lot of your Dick and Tim fics. It's probably so obvious, but you always write that Tim is watching Dick. In your newest one, Tim's watching Dick, in The Return Tim's watching Dick, and you even write that Tim is always watching him. Is Tim trying to read Dick? Trying to understand? Or does he understand him by watching? What is he trying to figure out by watching Dick? What does that say about Tim? I really hope this is intentional lmao because I would be embarrassed. Maybe this is just something so obvious that I'm just getting now.
YES IT’S ON PURPOSE <333 Anon. Anon. I'm so sorry this answer took forever, but listen, this was a really delightful ask <333 I think about this a lot. I really love origin stories—I like stories that resonate through a character’s history.
And for me, a whole lot of what interests me about Dick and Tim is that theme of watching and being watched. Seeing and being seen.
"Watch me on the trapeze, Tim. I'm going to do my act...'specially for you." | "Timmy, don't look." | "I turned away... I couldn't watch. Then I heard you crying and I turned back... I'm sorry, Dick. I didn't want to hurt you by telling you all this." Dick's watching me. Gauging my reactions. (Tim watching Dick watching Tim!) | "I'm taking off the blindfold." "No!" | "I can't see him. You can't see him. But I know Robin. And Robin's always there when you need him." | I love that kid. Too much to let him see me like this. (But Tim spots him anyway.)
Spotlights and lighthouses and cameras and photographs. Blindness and vision and masks and detective work and trust.
I'm going to try to be coherent about this but it's gonna be incoherent sdfsf BUT I'M GOING TO TRY so. Below the cut, a really long grab-bag of my rambling on vision and watchers and watching.
Tim + watching / Dick + being watched / different dynamics
Tim's origin story
Being watched goes with vulnerability/exposure
Incomplete list of moments with Dick and Tim and vision
Tim + watching
The first time we see Tim's face in LPoD: a close-up on his eyes looking for Dick, a close-up on his eyes at the moment that he sees Dick, a pullback to his face at the moment of recognition, a pullback to his face + his camera (you could maybe even argue that Tim comes into existence at the moment that he sees Dick, like, conceptually. the act of seeing is his defining characteristic. it is the thing that makes his character happen. he is the kid who's watching.)
Tim's a very vision-centric character: he's first introduced as a camera, then as a pair of binoculars, then as a pair of eyes. His whole backstory is about watching: watching Dick's parents die, watching Dick on TV, watching Batman and Robin. I've grabbed a few panels above with Tim watching Dick but there are so many more. His major deductions are all vision-based: he sees Dick-the-acrobat and later recognizes Dick-as-Robin; he sees Bruce-in-the-past and recognizes him as Bruce-of-our-time; the climactic moment in Red Robin is about going into a dark cave with a torch so he can see what's there.
And he's a detective. He pries into secrets. He analyzes people. He's a worrywart and a fusser who always wants to understand what's going on with other people. In a lot of those panels where Tim's watching Dick, his inner monologue is busy deducing Dick's emotions and trying to psychoanalyze him. Tim's caring and watchful and intuitive... but all those qualities also make him very very intrusive.
Dick + being watched
Dick performing acrobatics for Bruce, Donna, and Tim in Detective Comics 38 (his first appearance), New Teen Titans 16, Batman 441, and Nightwing 88 (where he reflects he's glad to be back in the hot glare of the spotlight)
Dick's a detective too, of course - Tim deliberately mirrors Dick, both in-universe and out-of-universe. But also Dick's a performer who loves being watched and also wants to control how he's seen. He gets a kick out of showing off, making puns, kicking ass, taking names, and he gets a kick out of having an appreciative audience. And he's got a kind of yearning for recognition - it hurts, when Bruce won't look at him, and in fights with Bruce, Babs, Roy, he'll often bring up the past, trying to get them to acknowledge a shared history.
At the same time, he's a very private person who withdraws and hides and pushes people away when he's upset. Right before Tim shows up, Dick's just ghosted the Titans because he's having emotional turmoil and doesn't want to have it in front of them, and they're trying to respect his wishes... but that solitude doesn't last long, because then Tim tracks him down. Tim will do this again when Dick's having an emotional crisis and trying to avoid everybody in Nightwing 110.
Possible dynamics
Tim watches Dick in Robin 11, while silently analyzing Dick's anxieties about Two-Face
"The watcher and the person being watched" is a dynamic that really interests me, partly because it can be so complicated?
You can see in Dick and Tim their very first roles: enthusiastic performer and the enthusiastic audience member. Dick likes to perform and show off and entertain; Tim likes to watch; those are roles they both easily slide into and they have a lot of fun together! But also you can look at the harsher side: the crime victim and the voyeur, the amateur photographer and the guy who hates being photographed. Dick's intensely private about his vulnerabilities; Tim's intrusive and watchful and constantly trying to figure out how other people tick. Sometimes Tim's the caring friend who watches Dick closely, reads him well, understands him; sometimes he's the nosy mini-detective who pries into Dick's secrets. And that's just two different ways of describing the same thing!
One of the things that kinda fascinates me about Dick and Tim's relationship is that in a lot of ways it's built on a bunch of low-key boundary violations. A lot of their early relationship is driven by Tim's desire to know more about Dick vs. Dick's reluctance to get close to anyone from Gotham; Tim's often out-of-line, but without his pushiness, it's hard to see how they would've developed a relationship at all. Later on, their friendlier relationship is marked by Dick teasing and low-key bullying Tim; it's pretty obvious that Tim isn't actually bothered by this, but it does involve Dick ignoring whatever Tim's claiming he doesn't like ("Quit it!" "Shh").
And one of the aspects of those boundary-violations is that Tim has a habit of witnessing things that Dick would prefer that nobody see. Tim's a witness to Dick's first and most miserable tragedy; he sees the aftermath of some of Dick's fights with Bruce; he's there when Donna dies. And he's sharp and observant and analytical, and I like to imagine this as being something Dick's not entirely comfortable with.
When Dick first meets Tim, it's before he's learned to wear a mask. And Tim spends a lot of time trying to see through Dick's masks, and he's pretty good at it, and a lot of that prying comes from love and care, because one of the ways that Tim shows love and respect and admiration is by trying to absorb absolutely everything about you, like a little sponge. But there's also something unsparing and even threatening about the search for the truth of someone else. It can be comforting or threatening, to know someone's watching you.
And I love how all that complexity is wrapped up in Tim's origin story? Both the giddy childish "Watch me on the trapeze" and then the awful grim reality of what Tim actually sees as a result and then the difficult connection when Dick and Alfred finally get Tim to explain how he knows their secret identities.
Tim's origin story
Tim (recounting his origin story in LPoD): My parents held me back as the thing moved to you. I cried out to warn you. (Two panels where we see just Tim's eyes, as he watches a crying Dick. He sees Batman approach and start trying to comfort Dick.)
I think fiction sometimes presents "being understood / seen / known" as an uncomplicatedly good thing, and there's nothing wrong with that! But I like complications, and I like the way Tim's origin story frames that moment of witnessing as difficult and fraught. Tim doesn't want to tell Dick how he knows their secret identities because he thinks it'll hurt Dick to know it: I don't want to hurt you, Dick, and I'm really afraid I might. And he's not wrong. It is painful; it does hurt; it's not something Dick's happy to know.
Dick's a very private person, and there's a painful intimacy to Tim's origin story - it's not Tim's fault he was there, but at the same time, it's not like Dick chose to have the most traumatic moment of his life on stage in front of an audience of strangers, you know? It's kind of a violation. In NTT/NT/Nightwing, Dick's pretty violently hostile to photographers, and he's intensely private about trauma in general, and I like to imagine this as partly a reaction to that foundational trauma of losing the most important people in his life and also doing it publicly.
And Tim's part of that audience. And he sees the worst part, the part that Dick can't talk about. He sees the bodies and the blood. He has nightmares about it for years. He hears Dick crying and sees him holding onto his parents' bodies. Not at all the kind of first impression Dick would want to make. Not at all the kind of person he wants to be seen as. And that understanding can be painful, because it's so close to the bone, and when Tim's just a stranger, it's upsetting, because Tim knows things that Dick would never have chosen for him to know. Their few conversations about it are awkward partly because Tim's thirteen and awkward... but at the same time, it's not Tim's fault so much as the situation! There's no way for Tim to talk about what he saw that wouldn't be uncomfortable for Dick.
... And yet, and yet. Tim's also one of the last people to see the Graysons alive. He sees Dick and his parents together; he even takes a picture with them. He remembers the whole thing so vividly he'll recognize Dick's somersault years later. He sees the grief. And so I think of that connection as kind of a metaphor for witnessing. Tim sees these things and they become real; Dick can't hide from them; in the act of being seen he's caught, he's in a spotlight, all the grief made real. You can't hide, that way. And Tim's got this unforgiving memory; he won't ever forget; he won't ever stop knowing.
But then, too: Dick's seen, he's known. Even at the very beginning, when Tim doesn't know enough to understand what he knows, he knows the important things.
So that shared memory is a barrier and a bond between them. It can be a source of discomfort or a source of comfort. And that's how I think about Tim watching Dick in general - it's complicated, and sometimes Dick's glad of it, and sometimes he resents it, and also it just is, it's a fact of Tim, that Tim watches. It's notable when he's not watching, when he's turned away.
Being watched goes with vulnerability/exposure
So I'm going to talk about the fraught feeling of being watched more in a little bit, but first: I think it's fascinating that Dick likes screwing around with games where Tim can't see!
Here's Nightwing 25 - Dick's come up with the idea of trainsurfing while blindfolded:
Tim: Are you sure this is such a good idea? Dick: Shh! Listen. Tune into the changing sounds and - Tim: I'm not so - Dick: JUMP!
Here's Robin 49 - clambering through a tunnel into No Man's Land:
Dick: Hard not to think about the river. All the water above us. And bugs. This tunnels' probably full of 'em. And rats. Big ones. Big blind rats with teeth as long as -
Here's Gotham Knights 9 - ambushing Tim in a sorta game of hide-and-seek:
Dick: Gotcha! Tim: Augh!
I feel like mmm I don't want to emphasize power dynamics too much because it's easy to overplay it BUT when I think about headcanons it's interesting to me to think about how maybe when Tim can't see, Dick's more in charge / in control, and so he feels more comfortable and less vulnerable, and that's often when he's most relaxed and playing around the most?
Whereas the moments when Tim's looking at him are often a bit more fraught, as here in Lonely Place of Dying:
Tim: I'm sorry, Dick. I really am. I didn't want to hurt you by telling you all this. Dick... Dick: It's all right, Tim. No matter how old you are, there are some things you never forget. Or get over. (Silent panel: Tim's watching Dick as Dick turns away and stares into the window.)
Or here in Nightwing 6, when Tim wakes him up from a nightmare:
Dick (internally, imagining a kid falling): He shouts to me. He always shouts to me. I never hear what he says. Tim: Nightwing! Wake up!
Or here in Gotham Knights 26, when Bruce is accused of murder:
(Silent panel where Tim's watching Dick.) Tim: I'm sorry. This must be hard for you. Dick: Me? Why? Tim: Well, I mean, it'd be one thing if we really knew he was innocent, but as it is - Dick: Wait, what? Stop right there. What are you saying, Tim?
Here's Tim spotting him before he can get away in Nightwing 110:
Dick (watching Tim from a distance, internally): Still, Timmy played it through nice and clean. Disarmed the perps, protected and avoided the cops. Kept any civilians from getting shot. God, I love that kid. Too much to let him see me like this. Tim: Hey! (appearing on the roof above him, fake-cheerful) You weren't gonna leave without saying hi, were you? Dick (looking away, very quietly): Hey, Timmy. Tim: Look at you, man! Back on both feet! Think you're done stopping bullets with your body for a while? Dick: Hope springs eternal. (Silent panel with Tim watching Dick, who's turned away.) Tim: You okay, Dick? Dick: I'm fine. Tim: Well, where're you staying these days? Dick: With some people.
Of course, sometimes Tim's watchfulness is frustrating but also a comfort, as in Detective Comics 874:
Tim (watching Dick, who's looking away): Are you listening to me, Batman? I'm saying the gas the Dealer used on you was powerful stuff. Dick: I'm fine, Red Robin. Besides...you're here now. Tim: You're not fine. And with or without me, you shouldn't be out on patrol ye - Dick: Sshhh. Here they come.
(Later in the comic, Dick mentally concedes that Tim's right that he hasn't really recovered from the gas, and Tim saves him from drowning when he's hallucinating. So Dick feels kind of exposed by the scrutiny, but also... he invited Tim along, so there's trust there, too - Tim's perceptiveness can be a good thing, too, when things are serious.)
Incomplete summary of moments with Dick and Tim and vision
I think I already mentioned a lot of these but here is my LIST
almost the first thing that Dick says to Tim is "watch me on the trapeze, Tim" and then Tim does and he basically never stops watching;
Tim watches Dick's parents die and watches Dick sobbing on-stage and watches him on TV and recognizes him by seeing a particular trick because he's dreamed about Dick doing the trick in his recurring nightmares about that night;
in New Titans 65 which is their very first team-up comic after Tim's origin, Dick's training pre-Robin Tim and gives him a test about watching for details and later Tim's takeaway is "I saw how [the Titans] listened to you";
there's a moment in Showcase '93 12 which is just Tim watching Dick and analyzing what's going on with him and there's another moment in Prodigal which is the same thing;
in Nightwing 6 Tim sneaks into Dick's apartment and hides in the dark and Dick spots him and tackles him; one of their most important bonding comics is Nightwing 25, where Dick insists on blindfolding him to get him to rely less on vision; when they sneak into No Man's Land they're in the dark and Tim can't see again and Dick's teasing him;
there are multiple moments when Tim can't see Dick for a bit and panics about his safety, in Nightwing 25, in No Man's Land, in Transference, in Bruce Wayne: Murderer;
Tim's there watching when Dick's wedding to Kory falls apart and he's there watching when Bruce and Dick fight and he's there watching when Donna dies and he's watching when Dick and Bruce swing together on the night before Infinite Crisis, and when Dick goes down and almost dies in Infinite Crisis we cut to Tim watching and seeing it happen and screaming;
there are multiple moments which are just silent panels of them staring at each other trying to figure out what's going on with each other or having a stand-off - in Bruce Wayne: Murderer, in Resurrection, in Red Robin;
in the aftermath of Donna's death there's a panel where Dick's watching Tim from a distance and not approaching;
in the aftermath of Blockbuster Dick spends half the comic just staring at Tim from a distance and hiding himself because "I love that kid - too much to let him see me like this," but Tim sees him anyway and chases him down and then they lie to each other and *ranting* LISTEN TO ME the whole comic is about Dick trying to AVOID being SEEN both literally but also METAPHORICALLY AND --!!!
(the only thing i'm even as halfway obsessive about for them is the heights thing because also there are a bunch of moments involving falling or Tim being anxious about heights and worried that he'll fall or Dick will fall)
In conclusion
Consider the progression in all these moments where Tim's watching an upset Dick and worrying about him!! From reaching out instinctively-but-pointlessly when he's too far away in the LPoD flashback, to almost reaching out in LPoD but hesitating, to putting a hand on Dick's back to walk him back to the Cave in Gotham Knights 10, to physically dragging him clear of the water in Batman: Black Mirror!
In conclusion I don't have a conclusion but basically YES, "watching Dick" is a core Tim characteristic as far as I'm concerned, and Tim watches Dick a lot and that can mean all kinds of things from admiration to nosy intrusiveness to worry to care to gratitude to trying-to-figure-out-what's-going-on-with-him, and sometimes Dick's resentful and sometimes he's relieved and sometimes he's playful and sometimes it's a mix of all those feelings.
And at first it's always Tim watching Dick, but later you've got Dick watching Tim too, and there's that moment where Dick's secretly watching him fight but Tim spots him in Nightwing 110 and there's a silent panel where Dick's watching him in Resurrection and at the very end of Robin there's a scene where Dick's secretly watching him fight but Tim spots him and in the very last issue of Red Robin Dick's watching the end of the confrontation with Boomerang and in Prodigal Dick's the one who notices his face is bruised and aaaaaaah
Anyway I think they're neat <3
#ask tag#hi anon this is SO old i'm so sorry sdfsfs#if you're still here hi!! <333#this was such a validating ask to get because as you can probably tell i think about the vision thing constantly#also this is SO long oh man. sorry i just started typing and it went on and on sdfdsf#dick grayson#tim drake#dick & tim#it's like. it's just endlessly fascinating to me because the paparazzi/photography stuff is one of dick's biggest triggers#and tim's introduced as a surreptitious amateur photographer#so there's no WAY they will ever get along#but then there's the Meaningful Photo from before the show#that low-key shows that tim's freaky obsessiveness comes from a place of genuine caring & this moment of real connection#so you have early days!dick kinda vibrating back and forth between 'I DON'T WANT HIM MAKE HIM GO AWAY'#vs. those moments when he IS getting attached to tim kinda against his will sdfsdf#and just. the dichotomy between paying attention as a form of love vs. being watched as a kind of violation and exposure#and that both are kinda the same thing?? and dick deeply craves the first and deeply hates the second#tim shows up being all I REMEMBER and what he remembers is exactly what dick was demanding bruce remember in b416#but /also/ he remembers /everything/ 'i remember it all' he remembers the graysons dying in incredibly painful detail#and like. kid!tim is very tactless & has only two switches of 'TELL HIM NOTHING' and 'if forced to speak then overshare'#but the tactlessness is a fixable problem and the remembering is /not/#it's not like it's any better for tim to keep his mouth shut & dick to just be painfully /aware/ that he's thinking abt the graysons dying#bc ofc /tim/ remembering forces /dick/ to remember#but!! but also. you know. maybe that remembering /isn't/ entirely a bad thing#and dick's feelings about it can change over time#anyway tim's not the only person that dick has this kind of conflict with - wally & roy sometimes chase him down when he's withdrawing too#and he often doesn't really appreciate it from them either#and dick's not the only person who gets subjected to tim's particular brand of intrusive caring#conner's not thrilled about the dna thing & ives would be within his rights to resent the stalking even though he doesn't#but i am obviously personally most fond of the ways this plays out with dick & tim
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Maybe you've already seen it, but just in case! I love this Silk fanart??🤩
https://x.com/defnothush61044/status/1804345428634464324
oh I haven't, nonny, thanks for sharing!! This is so cute omg I love it <333
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I'm begging you, if you're gonna send me hate at least be knowledgeable about what you say.
#smh#toadanswers#go back through the art#come back and write a new hate message dummy#because this one was hella stupid of you#toad rambles#i personally dont mind some hate here and there#keeps me humble lol#and it's good for some laughs especially when they don't know what tf they're talking about#but pls make it make sense dude!#you're looking like a real fool and i'm starting to feel bad#who hurt you anon?#let's talk it out#*pats a chair next me*#why are you so mad?#why do want to hurt others?#are you hurt and feel like you deserve better?#because better isn't going to come if you react like this when things don't go your way
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hello!! it's idat twt video anon back from the dead (I'm terrible at maintaining conversation)
I wanna thank you again for being a hub for our collective insanity, I've been scrolling through your blog lookin at what boyboy deep cuts I've missed and oh BOY the oil video is quite something. and I feel like I should share /my/ deepcut that I found even though it's nowhere near the same genre as the other stuff but a fellow man of culture (aleksa enjoyer) will appreciate it I think
https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x7s9nvk
so I watch idats one man band video maybe every week because one man band aleksa has such a grip on the creases of my brain folds, and one day I was lightly searching, perusing if you will, to see if he's done more music stuff and I found this gem courtesy of dailymotion user HankSydney. about half an hour of Aleksa singing what I assume is Serbian folk and honestly what a treat. none of us have ever done even close to what would be enough to deserve this. wonderful
(im gonna ask if I can give myself one of those anon ID emojis until I can figure out whether to ~unmask~ (come off anon), I propose 🌵)
HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII HELP ME... you're all completely welcome i myself have been made aware of SO many deep cuts i wouldve legitimately never found out abt on my own thanks to you guys!!!! the oil video is...... lets just say that i saw the greatest minds of my generation destroyed by boy boy oil video.
ohhhhhhh my god im gonna go crazy..... yeah ive known abt his appearance at the serbian festival in sydney for a while now but for some reason ive been putting it off the entire time bc i knew itd obliterate me in a completely different way than any video of him & alex borderline touching penises ever could so thank you for finally forcing me to check it out!!! ive just done the kubrick stare at my monitor for about thirty minutes like im honestly speechless hes SO...... his singing voice is SOOOOOO much deeper than his speaking one and the way he sings is so soulful and emotional you can rly tell how truly passionate he is abt music thats so fucking crazy... plus all of the songs are sooo beautiful im definitely gonna go back with shazam in hand and try to find all of their names like its just that dire for me rn. save me serbian folk music
i need to share this clip at least bc this part fucking gagged me to PIECES... im trying my hardest to be normal but hes sooo charismatic & confident and such a great performer plus he works the crowd rly well...... also every time he looks up after pausing the looper his eyes r so like.. electrifying i need to be sedated i think. tldr hes soooooooo talented & funny & good at what he does twirling my hair hiiiiii aleksa. aleksa heeeyyyy hiii aleksa<33333 if you read this im free on thursday night we could hang out on thursday night when i am free please respond to this im free on thursday night
#GOING CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#youre SOOOO real for watching the idat one man band video every week every time i watch that one i get like .#legitimately overwhelmed by the beauty of music & humanity when they get all the people & esp children to dance in the streets.....#aleksa vulović#boy boy#I LOVE....CULTURE!!!!!! im rly rly happy that i understood some of the lyrics sometimes i jump up and down in my bed for five hours#when i realize he's a slav like me ^_______^ (and alex as well technically. i think)#thank you so much for this again also of course no problem!! from now on you're: 🫵#cactus anon#asks#btw tumblr user gothgirlsakura if you see this your notification is in the video LOL i was rly rly lazy to screenrecord it again. Yaaayyyy
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What if all “shuggy is mid” are just luffy alt accounts?
Luffy has a ton of alt accounts just to talk shit about Buggy and the ship. Which is hilarious because Buggy does the same to talk shit about Shanks. Shanks is the only one who publicly says he loves them both a lot. I think this summarizes their dynamic perfectly.
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So I might have messed with my carrd again... a little...
Ultimate Main: Kylo (OBVIOUSLY~! <33333) Second Ultimate Main: Sackler Mains: Charlie, Cesar, Matt, and Jamie Imeanwhut Other F/O: Mills, Ronnie, Paterson, Phillip, Jude, Randy, Clyde, and Paul
These are subject to change whenever lol Still not comfortable sharing any of them but wanted to ya know.. showcase the ones who have affected my irl thoughts and feelings and have helped me a lot, the ones I'm incredibly attached to from the get go and mean the world to me.
That's not to say those in the "Other F/O" category don't mean anything to me, they really do but they haven't had an impact on something I was struggling with irl where as the ultimate's and mains have <3
#Cosmic chatter#inb4 anon: I HaVe A pR0bLeM wItH y0U hAvInG M0Re ThAn oNe F/o lol if you're gonna try it don't because you'll get blocked#Mentioning that here because EVERYTIME and I do mean every time I make an update like this some clown has to be like 'Your love isn't real'#so yeah lmao
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ONE WEEK LEFT!!!!!!
#May16th
anon I'm gonna need you to check back in on the 16th fr I fear I won't awake up in time for the second part haha
#parents are coming parents are coming!!!!!!#did everyone clean their rooms and fold their laundry????#i fear the wrath (and imperfectly perfect) pair that is lord and lady whistledown#nic and luke you're everything ily ily ily i can't wait#real talk i genuinely do fear for my health#every polin moment has me going 🥺‼️ so can you imagine their season???? 😭😭😭😭😭#anon pls do check on me 🥺#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#polin#anon#anonymous#one week!!!!
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Did you know!! That!!!!! Erm!!! Jamiazu!!!!!! They are silly!!!!!!
-Snake Anon
they* beg to differ
* jamil. (i have noooo idea what azul is up to 😬)
#hiiii snakey ily you're so real for this one#askbox!#snake anon 🐍#doodles#my art :>#twisted wonderland#twst fanart#twst#azujami#jamiazu#azul ashengrotto#jamil viper
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you made an art guide for canes right? do you have any info for drawing crutches too?
nope, I don't use crutches! I think a few people in the notes of the cane post might have chimed in with their experiences, and some people might know of a post or offer their experience in the replies here if you're lucky!
But I suggest, in this order:
Looking into online stores for crutches and crutch accessories to learn about the varieties
Reading/watching medical resources for using the different types of crutches from physical therapists so you understand how they work and what they help with
and then finally looking to see if you can find community resources, tags, and posts from actual crutch users to do more research about lived experiences and actual use cases
The medical and store research up front will give you a solid baseline understanding of the many varieties of crutches and how they work, which is necessary information to have the proper language and knowledge so you can actually learn from real people what their experiences are truly like.
Good luck! Sorry I can't be more help.
#cane stuff#anon#asks#sorry I dont have other resources#and if I did I would not be able to personally confirm their legitimacy#this ones on you#this is also general basic research etiquette tbh#try to get as much factual and technical knowledge as you can up front#and then look to real people and real experiences once you know as much as possible#and never. ever ever ever ever ever.#NEVER use it as an opportunity to correct people on their lived experiences#you're there to learn#respect first. always#and part of that respect is learning as much as you can before looking to communities for their knowledge#so they dont have to explain to you the basic functions of how their life works
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