#andrea's work van just be like that

[leclerc-s]

paint the town red - part eleven

YOU AND ME WE'D BE A BIG CONVERSATION

series masterlist

SUMMER BREAK 2024

tony stark i expect every single one of you at the lake house for the next few weeks.

bianca stark-potts i can't. sorry dad. tony stark you can't? what do you mean you can't? you don't have work for the next few weeks. bianca stark-potts i have plans

tony stark WITH FUCKING WHO?

bianca stark-potts with my boyfriend

may parker oh how exciting! where are you going?

bianca stark-potts i'm not saying because my dad will literally track me down.

pepper potts have fun

james rhodes use protection!

harley keener and that is the sound of tony fainting. peter parker and that other sound was tony's unholy screeching.

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amore mio (my love)

something about her looking at the view but i'm looking at her

liked by harryosborn, charles_leclerc, katebishop and others

biancastark_potts ¿qué horas son, mi corazón?

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katebishop someone tell the winch to be gone!

samwilson WHO IS HE STARK-POTTS?

peterbparker listen, i'm not saying the old man is spiraling but the old man is spiraling

↳ biancastark_potts oh i know he is, harley is sending me a hour by hour update on him. happy is also complaining.

lilymhe it's 5:39 pm in new york!

↳ biancastark-potts thank you corazón!

yelenabelova i love knowing something stark doesn't.

tonystark WHERE ARE YOU?!

↳ biancastark_potts here, there, everywhere.

↳ tonystark THAT'S NOT AN ANSWER!

steverogers bianca, why is your father trying to track you down at the tower?

↳ biancastark_potts i'm on vacation and he wants to know where i am.

↳ tonystark SHE'S WITH A BOY STEVEN! A BOY!

↳ steverogers she's a fully grown woman anthony. not everyone is harry.

america_chavez the wicked witch of the west is here? someone tell him to fuck off

wandamaximoff having fun?

↳ biancastark_potts yeah

↳ wandamaximoff good. if someone breaks into his apartment, it wasn't us.

↳ biancastark_potts he says it's all good. it's finally clean.

joaquintorres nice apartment, it's not yours.

↳ biancastark_potts shut your trap torres.

↳ joaquintorres TELL ME WHO IT IS!!!

do you have time to talk soon?

i'm out of the country and if i was in the country, the answer would still be no.

we have nothing to talk about.

don't be like that b, i still love you.

this is exhausting. we are never ever getting back together. like ever.

did you just fucking reply with taylor swift lyrics?

i did.

and i have a boyfriend so please leave me alone.

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told him the last one only gave me flowers on anniversaries and he said, "that is not acceptable. you should be given flowers all the time, for no reason."

🎾🎾

kate bishop where's my monegasque man to sweep me off my feet and buy me flowers for no reason??

yelena belova that is gross. who needs love? kate bishop we get it, you're allergic to love. yelena belova i just do not see the point in it. all i need is my dog and i am happy.

maria hill i have to say it, this one is so much better than the last one.

wanda maximoff have you told him about harry?

bianca stark-potts i did, we talked about. it in hungary, when he found out about him.

america chavez she's in looove. she's literally playing paddle with him

natasha romanoff who are you and what have you done to the bianca we all know? you hate sports

bianca stark-potts i don't like tennis or baseball. they're boring sports. i can enjoy soccer or football. but i hate participating in sports. bianca stark-potts he also told me, "i have to train somehow" and i knew andrea would be on my ass if this man didn't do some training

hope van dyne he bought you flowers? for no reason?

bianca stark-potts yup. he disappeared for like 20 minutes and when he came back he was holding a bouquet of tulips in his hand.

kate bishop again where's my monegasque man??

bianca stark-potts he has a brother?? kate bishop he doesn't seem like my type.

pepper potts i'm glad you're happy bianca.

bianca stark-potts thanks mom!!

bianca stark-potts by the way, he says hello!

bianca stark-potts and he said that if nat and wanda break into his apartment to knock, his brother is staying over because his apartment got flooded.

natasha romanoff but where's the fun in that?

bianca stark-potts "i'd rather not explain to my mum that my brother died of a heart attack because black widow and the scarlet witch broke into my apartment because i'm dating you" - silly vroom man

wanda maximoff we'll set off the home alarm on purpose as a warning.

bianca stark-potts "that works! thank you! and if my brother gets scared please send a picture of his face. i need new blackmail material." - silly vroom man

america chavez typical sibling move.

yelena belova HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?! YOU DON'T HAVE SIBLINGS?

america chavez I HAVE TO SHARE A FLOOR WITH ELI, KATE, AND THE OTHERS WHEN THEY'RE OVER! I LIVE A FLOOR BELOW PETER AND HARLEY! I KNOW THE WAY THAT SHIT WORKS!

george russell you dragged her into a paddle game??

charles leclerc i didn't drag her george.

alex albon he has to train somehow george. can't you see he's too busy wooing a stark-potts?

lando norris WHAT THE FUCK DOES HE NEED TO TRAIN FOR? HE'S LITERALLY 100 POINTS AHEAD OF US ALL?

carlos sainz wrong. he's 73 points ahead of me.

max verstappen is this what you guys felt with me last year?

pierre gasly 100% yuki tsnuoda absolutely oscar piastri totally. daniel ricciardo yes. max verstappen you only drove like 6 races?? daniel ricciardo i wanted to be included maxie!

pierre gasly he's in looove!!

charles leclerc shut up?

oscar piastri he bought her flowers. i saw the instagram story.

lando norris STAND UP CHARLES!!

george russell and i thought alex was the biggest simp. turns out it was charles.

logan sargeant oh come on, this guy had the worst year of his career last year, let him have this.

charles leclerc thank you logan!

max verstappen then tell him to stop flirting with me??

yuki tsunoda that is like asking me to stop loving food. it is impossible. carlos sainz no one will ever love anything as much as yuki loves food

tony stark hey, how y'all doin?

bianca stark-potts get off my dad's phone samuel.

tony stark WHO THE FUCK IS HE??

carlos sainz oh boy can't wait until they find out. tony stark TELL US WHAT YOU KNOW SAINZ!!

isaiah atkins oh my god, when will my nightmare end??

peter parker NEVER BITCH!!

charles leclerc you should've never taken the job then?

isaiah atkins yeah, you would like that wouldn't you? charles leclerc oh fuck you.

harley keener your girlfriend does that enough for you.

tony stark LECLERC HAS A GIRLFRIEND??

peter parker SINCE WHEN DOES LORD PERCEVAL HAVE A GIRLFRIEND??

harley keener have neither of you seen his stories?? he's been with a girl all break??

tony stark bianca come home! the children (america, mj, kate and me) miss you!

bianca stark-potts i literally hate you so much samuel.

sebastian vettel i can't wait until this exact text bites all of you in the ass

ollie bearman you're included seb. we ALL know.

tony stark know what?? what am i missing? arthur leclerc ignore him. he's in summer break mode still. ollie bearman your brother is literally a better liar than you.

NETHERLANDS 2024

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WE'RE BACK PEOPLE!! I GOT CONTROL OF THE ACCOUNT AGAIN!! EVERYONE SAY HALLELUJAH!!

SPOTTED: lightning mcqueen with mater

SPOTTED: spongebob and patrick, i'll let you decide who's who.

enjoy this picture of tony because he pissed me off.

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¡leclerc-s speaks! this one's a little short, but i swear the next one will be longer. it lowkey sucks too but oh well, the next one will be better, also this serves as a reminder that yelena is canonically aroace!!!!

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[thethirdromana]

I was gonna ask you some stuff about Quincey and the aftermath of the Civil War, but that wasn't really near the 1890s so idk if it's relevant.

Also similar to Mina maybe supporting eugenics I would imagine Seward probably engages in a lot of pseudosciences

But more interestingly, what do you think Dracula's politics would be? He's pretty removed from human society by being a vampire and his home in Transylvania is pretty remote, but he was still a nobleman there and he was moving to England, which he planned to conquer. I'm curious where he'd fall, when pretending to be and working with (?) humans in Romanian politics (if you feel like researching it) and English politics. Another cool layer to this is if you subscribe to the popular theory that he's really Vlad the Impaler. What would a warlord from the mid-1400s think of the politics 400 or so years later? That's barely even thinking about him being a vampire.

Also, what would Renfield's politics be like?

Quincey and the aftermath of the Civil War is a fascinating question that I will definitely leave for someone who knows more US history than I do.

Dracula, on the other hand... first of all, the relevant set of politics is Hungarian, not Romanian. Transylvania was part of Austria-Hungary in the 1890s. There's actually an interesting story here, in that vampire myth was originally associated primarily with Hungary. Then Bram Stoker set Dracula in Transylvania, which became part of Romania in 1920, and Romania ended up inheriting vampire myths in the process. Which has generally done the Romanian tourist industry no harm at all. (Though when I was in Bucharest last weekend, my lovely tour guide, Andrea, was clearly a bit annoyed by people asking about it).

Anyway, we have a decent sense of what Dracula's politics are, because he spells them out on May 8: he's proud to be part of a fighting, conquering race, he values "warlike days", he disdains peasants, and he generally holds that might makes right.

Given his pride in "beating the Turk on his own ground", I think we can assume that he didn't approve of Austria-Hungary's neutrality in the Russo-Turkish War in 1877-8.

In some ways he fits into contemporary society. He is a boyar, one of the highest rank of feudal nobility, who retained a great deal of power in 1890s Austria-Hungary. Where in the UK the growth of industry made the middle classes wealthier, in Austria-Hungary that wealth often went straight back to the nobility. Just six percent of the population had the right to vote in general elections, compared with 18% in the UK (meanwhile New Zealand had universal suffrage from 1893).

But Dracula is still a product of an earlier time. He wants to increase his power through conquest, not through modernising his estate or being appointed to the board of directors of a bank. And while Austria-Hungary did grow through conquest (occupying Bosnia and Herzegovina in 1878, for instance), it wasn't at nearly the same scale as other contemporary empires - for example, Austria-Hungary didn't take part in the Scramble for Africa.

Honestly, it makes perfect sense that Dracula would want to come to Britain. If he wanted conquest, carried out with indifference to cruelty, he would have got on extremely well with Cecil Rhodes. To an extent this is what the story of Dracula is about: what if foreigners came to Britain and did to us what we do to them? The War of the Worlds, published at the same time, asks essentially the same question but with aliens.

(This is the bit where someone comes along and says yes, but don't forget that Bram Stoker was Irish. Which is true, but he was also a supporter of the British Empire.)

As for Renfield, most of what we learn about his politics comes from October 1. He's from high society and is a member of the Windham Club. He celebrates the roles Quincey, Van Helsing and Arthur play "by nationality, by heredity, or by the possession of natural gifts" - in other words, he seems to be open to people advancing themselves through meritocracy, but also through hereditary rights. To me, this reads as conservative, but not reactionary.

One thing that does strike me is that his point about Texas - celebrating its admittance to the Union - relates to history that was 50 years old at that point (Unless I'm misunderstanding the reference?). Renfield is 59 during the events of Dracula. Is the implication here that he's stuck in the past? We don't know how long he's been institutionalised, but since his memories of Arthur's father relate to youthful drinking games, it could be 30 years or more. He may be disconnected from contemporary politics - and given how much the world changed in the late 19th century, that could make for quite a shock if he'd ever had the chance to learn more.

As ever, I'm not a historian, and other people should feel free to offer corrections.

[fyonahmacnally]

A Wicked Game

Here's a little RojasCorp drabble as part of the Mods' collection of example fics for the Supergirl May-hem Event. Read it HERE on AO3.

Sign-ups for Supergirl May-Hem open December 1st. Seeking writers, artists and betas. For more information, you can find us HERE.

There is something about their relationship that has always been a bit toxic. A small, tiny little fact that never seems to matter to either of them. It seems the two of them are drawn to each other like magnets. Regardless of how much betrayal is shared between them, no matter how many lies are told, they find their way into each other’s orbit. Every time, without fail. 

Lena is beginning to understand that it is inevitable. She’s tried to resist it for years, but it’s futile. It’s a cycle that has been repeating itself since she was a teenager. An exasperated sigh slips from her lips as she brings the crystal tumbler up, drinking the last of her Macallan Red. She briefly considers whether to pour another, but her hands are already tilting the bottle before she consciously decides. A quiet chuckle fills the air around her as she sits the bottle back down, eyeing the one sitting next to it on her liquor cabinet. Her taste in scotch has naturally shifted over the years, drifting closer to her Irish roots. Andrea was the one who introduced her to the whiskey back in their boarding school days. Van Horne. It’s the name on the bottle glaring back at her from the shelf in front of her. 

She throws her head back and blows out a huff of frustration. Her overactive mind always does this to her after an encounter with her childhood friend. Their lives have been intermingled in the most intricate ways for most of her life. By design or by fate, she’s never been sure. Either way, the woman infuriates her in ways no one else can. 

Fucking Andrea.

Making her way to her bedroom, she strips off the suit she’s been wearing for far longer than she wanted and changes into her softest leggings, warmest fuzzy socks, and her favorite sweater. When she agreed to the tech investment dinner, she knew there was a chance Andrea would be there. They work in the same industry and have always been part of the same social groups so running into the Latina is something she is accustomed to. What she didn’t expect was for Andrea to show up with her. The obnoxious little parasite that has been nipping at Andrea’s heels for years. She can’t even remember her name, but she’s made the rounds through all of the eligible, rich women in their circle. She and Andrea broke off their…arrangement (?) six months ago, but it was still a bit of a shock to see her ex-something with someone else. 

Their relationship was never exactly exclusive. Their lives and jobs have never allowed them to be in the same place at the same time for very long so they’ve always just agreed to being together when they can and taking other bed partners if and when they had an itch to scratch. For the most part, it’s always worked out. Andrea had moved to National City not too long after Lena’s arrival and they’d spent a lot more time together, definitely a lot more time in each other’s beds. Their most recent split was over a business disagreement that swiftly escalated into one of their nastiest fights since right after college. The Russell Incident, as Lena often refers to it in her head. That fight led to them not speaking for four years. Now she wonders if it will be the same this time. 

Lena doesn’t get a chance to explore that train of thought. Just as she leaves her bedroom padding towards her liquor cabinet and her Macallan Red, a harsh buzzing echoes through her penthouse. There’s only one person it can be and she’s not drunk enough to deal with what she knows is going to be a heated confrontation. She slams back what’s left of her third glass of scotch, debates on refilling it again, and stomps her way to the front door instead. 

Glancing at the video monitor beside the door, she rolls her eyes. Andrea is standing there with her typical feigned look of nonchalance. She knows the woman too well and can see the nervous vulnerability hiding beneath the facade. Tonight, she certainly doesn’t want to deal with it. She’s too pissed and hurt to want to subject herself to Andrea’s usual wicked little games, but it seems she is being forced to. So, she takes a deep breath, steels herself, and erects the Luthor armor before yanking the door open.

“What do you want, Drea?” Lena hisses, pure venom dripping from her words. She checks her watch. It’s just after midnight. “Hmmm, I figured you’d already be back at your apartment fucking what’s her name by now. Bored of her already? Such a shame.” She stands in her doorway, blocking entrance to the brunette with a hand on the doorframe and a raised brow. 

Andrea sighs, her hands twisting in front of her in a way Lena hasn’t seen since they were in their teens. “Come on, Querida (darling). Please let me in so we can talk.” She reaches up like she is going to put a hand on Lena’s, but pulls back at the last minute. “Lena, mi corazón (my heart), I’m begging you, let me explain. It’s not what you think. I promise.”

The CEO scoffs, her emerald eyes a fiery spear piercing the Latina’s soul. “Your promises are empty so save it. First of all, you have absolutely no right calling me any of your little pet names, Drea. Not anymore. You lost that privilege. Second of all, why in the hell should I let you into my home, my safe space after the shit you have put me through most of our lives?” Her voice drops low, pure anger radiates from her skin and body like electricity. “I’m done with your emotional games, Andrea. I’m not that scared little girl you toyed with when we were kids. Gods, I should have put an end to your wicked bullshit years ago.”

She groans and steps back, opening the door to let the seemingly forlorn woman into her home. Closing the door, she presses a hand to Andrea’s chest and steps in front of her, preventing her from moving further into the apartment. Once she has the woman trapped between herself and the door, she crosses her arms just below her breasts, narrows her eyes, and raises her signature brow again. She knows what it does to her ex. It’s always been something that sends shivers down Andrea’s spine and Lena plans to use it to her advantage.

“You have exactly five minutes to explain before I kick you out of here and out of my life, Drea.” She extends her arm to look at her watch for emphasis and resumes her crossed arm pose, extending to her full height with her shoulders back. “I suggest you use it wisely.”

“Right. Okay.” Andrea shifts from one foot to the other, feeling decidedly uncomfortable and unfortunately turned on. Lena has always had this effect on her when she gets mad. What? So sue her, Lena’s fucking hot when she’s mad. She does her best to shake that thought from her head and clears her throat. “Riley was there as a favor to her father. That’s all it was, I swear. Well, I mean, I also wanted to make you jealous.” Andrea grins, that little sparkle in her eyes that always appears when she’s trying to get what she wants. 

A molten hot wave of rage boils up from Lena’s gut, crawling up her chest, and sitting heavy on her tongue. She sees the moment Andrea realizes she fucked up and relishes watching those ocean blue eyes widen. “This. Is. Exactly. What. I. Mean.” Lena hisses each word, low and dangerous, she steps closer to the Latina as Andrea shuffles backward until her back lands harshly against the front door. The startling thud makes her swallow audibly. “I’m done with your fucking games, Drea. I’m too old for this shit. Go play your tricks on someone else.”

Lena takes a few more steps into Andrea’s personal space, their height difference barely noticeable. She leans forward, close enough that Andrea can feel her warm breath on her plump lips. “Mmm, it’s too bad, too. We both know there’s nobody else that fucks you like I do.” She smirks. Andrea’s chest heaves from their proximity and releases a quiet moan. She softly nuzzles her nose on the brunette's cheek before licking her lips close enough to graze the woman’s bottom lip.  “See, you have always assumed I will just be around whenever you want. Not anymore.”

She pushes herself back and away from her former lover, glancing over her shoulder once more before she walks away. “See yourself out, Drea. I’m done with you.”

The sun beams into the bedroom, stirring Lena from her slumber. Blinking away the grogginess of sleep, she feels soft lips and warm hands skimming across her bare skin. She sighs and rolls her eyes.

“Good morning, Querida.” Andrea says, a sleepy smile and adoring eyes trained on Lena. “I’ll make breakfast. Stay in bed.” She says, pressing a soft kiss to the porcelain skin of her forehead and bounces out of bed. She grabs Lena’s robe as she exits the room just like she’s done a thousand times before.

Lena groans. The cycle begins again.

Oh the wicked games they play. 

[stellariders]

https://tvline.com/lists/chicago-fire-season-13-spoilers-severide-promotion-arson-ofi/

He said he didn’t want to be behind the desk ever again but he still wants to move to OFI and take after Van Mayer which means desk job? Make it make sense

🤬🤬🤬

my hatred for arson is so big i can’t even explain it. i need kelly to stay far away from ofi. i still don’t understand two things.

one, at what point did kelly go from consistently tell ofi investigators that he wants to focus on being lieutenant of squad 3 to wanting to run ofi one day. that was so random and when he mentioned that in season 12 i was just confused in every way imaginable.

and two, is what you said, he likes to be in the field where the action is and ofi is more paperwork work and less action, it’s a desk job which is exactly the opposite of what he wants. consistency is very obviously not andreas thing.

andreas inability to listen to the fans when we say we hate arson and she just doesn’t care and continues to not only give him arson cases but want him to run the damn department even though he’s said he doesnt want to transfer pisses me off. if they explain where the shift came from, give him additional storylines so his entire storyline doesn’t revolve around arson, and have him interact more with the firehouse, i really don’t care if he does ofi. but it’s clear none of that will happen so i will continue to stay mad.

since kelly very clearly won’t ever get a promotion, he needs a medal. it’s long overdue. also, i want to see something career related come from him (not related to ofi). i want him to teach at the academy or mentor a kid or something. i just don’t want his only professional storyline to revolve around something so many people despise, ofi. andrea please listen to the fanssss

[your-divine-ribs]

Ice Cold Part 15

Words: 2.4k

Lyla finds out more about Van’s past 💙

Ice Cold Masterlist Main Masterlist

"I owe you my life Lyla."

Raj's voice was filled with an appreciative kind of awe that made me squirm in my seat. I was uncomfortable enough visiting him as it was, I hated hospitals, but the praise he kept heaping on me just made things worse.

"You'd have done the same for me, any of us would have," I replied. "I just wish I'd not been distracted. As soon as I saw those fake waiters I knew something was wrong. I shouldn't have hesitated."

My mind drifted back to that fateful night in Paris and the note from Van urging me to 'GET OUT NOW'. I was sure if I'd followed that instruction I would have been at Raj's graveside now rather than his hospital bed, but still it didn't seem good enough.

Raj shifted where he lay, groaning and screwing up his face, clutching his bandaged abdomen. "Shit... I think it's time for my pain meds again."

"I'll get a nurse," I offered, rising to my feet. "I should be getting back to the office anyway."

"No!" He said hurriedly. "Don't go yet!"

I hesitated, turned to him, watched an awkward little smile emerge on his lips as he struggled to hide his discomfort. "I was thinking... erm... maybe when I get out of this place... maybe we could... errr... go and grab a drink or something?"

My heart sank as I took in his hopeful expression and I just hoped the small smile that I painted on looked genuine. "Errr... yeah sure... that'd be nice... look I really do need to get back. I'll come and visit again soon."

"I'd like that," I heard him say as I hurriedly turned and made for the exit.

Of course I had no intention on taking Raj up on his offer. He was nice enough, a real gentleman, good-looking and sweet. Someone I was that sure Jen would call 'a real catch', but those qualities didn't interest me. They didn't make my heart race and my mind spin. They didn't make me feel the same way that Van did.

In truth, my visit to Raj wasn't just as a well-meaning friend or colleague, I'd also had an ulterior motive. I wanted to find out who'd he'd been working with on the psychological profiling team. I tried to tell myself that I wanted to delve into Van's past to assist me with bringing him down, but I couldn't lie to myself anymore. I was in so deep now all I could do was tread water and try and keep my head above the surface, the dangerous current threatening to completely sweep me away.

Andrea was a small bird-like woman with sharp features and a serious demeanour, and she looked at me with something between wonder and admiration as I asked her to walk me through Van's psychological profile report.

"We've all been talking about you in this office Lyla," she said, eyes bright. "No one else has spent so much time with Van before and got away with their life. What was he like?"

Exciting... Dangerous... Intoxicating...

I batted the words out of my mind and settled on a very different adjective.

"Terrifying."

I saw Andrea visibly shudder as she pushed her glasses further up the bridge of her nose, picking up a thick file and starting to leaf through.

"You know, you're such a good agent," she said, pulling out sheets and photos. "Most field operatives don't care much about profiles and psych reports, they're straight in there all guns blazing, going for glory. They don't realise that getting inside someone's head and knowing how their mind works is key to catching them."

"Well, no matter what they've done, they're still people at the end of the day, right?" I answered.

Andrea narrowed her eyes. "Oh, we don't do this to humanise them. They're monsters... all of them... no matter what they've been through. No... we do this to find their weaknesses. That's how we bring them down."

"Oh..." I looked away quickly, taking a sip of my coffee.

Andrea carried on, a thoughtful look in her eyes. "Of course someone like Van... well that's easier said than done. He doesn't appear to have any weaknesses. Tell me... you've been the closest to him... what are your thoughts? Is there anything we can use to get to him?"

Her question caught me off guard and I froze for a moment. Of course Van had a weakness. A very obvious one. And unbeknownst to Andrea she was looking directly at it.

"Errr... no... I don't think he does have any weaknesses that I've seen... but he's just a man right? They're all weak in some way, hey?"

I nudged Andrea gently, grinning, trying for a joke to distract from the serious look on her face as she studied me intently, but it was quite obvious she wasn't the joking type. She simply sighed and turned her attention back to the files, picking up an old dog-eared crime report.

A photo slipped out of the pages and fell in front of me on the desk and I picked it up for a closer inspection. It was a small boy, he couldn't have been any older than five or six. His clothes were crumpled and torn and stained with what looked like dried blood. The pale skin of his face was streaked with it too. The haunted look in his eyes told me that he'd seen horrors no boy of his age should have seen.

"Is this... is this Van?" I stuttered.

I didn't really need to ask. I'd recognise those striking blue-green eyes anywhere. Andrea nodded.

"What happened to him?"

Andrea's expression was grim as she spoke. "This was taken when they found him, he was just six years old. His family were killed... all of them.... and he witnessed it. He'd been left in the house for five days with their bodies when they found him."

"Christ..." I breathed. "How were they killed?"

"Murdered."

The word cut through me like a knife to the heart and an image of my own dead father flashed through my mind's eye.

Andrea wasn't finished with her gruesome tale. "It was brutal, a machete attack apparently. The father was beheaded. It was a gangland style execution."

Nausea rose in me. "Who did it?"

"I'm sure you've heard of Tommy Chappell."

I nodded. Everybody had. An infamous criminal who was notorious for running all of the criminal activity in the North twenty years ago.

"Van's father was a bad man. Really bad. Rotten to the core. He used to work for Tommy, running the drug operations. He got greedy though, he was skimming money off the top, and then of course when he got found out Tommy had to make an example of him."

"What about his mum?"

Andrea had a look of distaste on her face. "She was no better. A junkie and an alcoholic. She should never have had children, those boys were neglected right from the moment they were born. They never really stood a chance."

"Boys?" I said, confused by the plural term.

She sifted through the files again, her fingers alighting on another photo. Van looked even younger here and he was with an older boy.

"Van has a brother?"

"Did," Andrea confirmed. "He was a lot older than Van. Chappell didn't spare him either."

I could picture the horrific scene in my mind, Van as a young child, forced to watch his family members meet their grisly ends. It didn't matter whether they were good or bad people, at that age family were all you had. I shook my head, trying to clear the emotion away that was threatening to surface. I had to be professional.

"So what happened to him... afterwards?"

Andrea pulled a sizeable stack of papers out of the file and placed them into my outstretched hands. "He got taken into care. He was young enough that there were plenty of families who were interested in fostering to start with... well, that was until the problems started."

I stopped sifting through the papers and looked up at Andrea, eager to hear more.

"It became apparent quite quickly that Van wasn't like other six year olds. Something was seriously wrong with him. He was... cruel, destructive, often violent. One family went so far as to say he was evil."

I scoffed disbelievingly. "That's ridiculous! He was six years old! After everything he'd been through it's not surprising he had issues!"

"Naturally," Andrea agreed. "Social care's come a long way in the last twenty years. Unfortunately Van was shipped around a lot at first. Families handed him back because they couldn't cope with him. Eventually they ran out of options, so he stayed in care homes... some of them shall we say... rather disreputable..."

She screwed up her face. She didn't need to elaborate, I'd heard enough horror stories of vulnerable children abused by those who had been trusted to care for them.

Andrea went on. "He became just another product of the system... damaged. It's a textbook classic example really. I mean, not all psychopathic behaviour stems from neglect and abuse, but the majority does. If an infant doesn't receive the love they need to form emotional bonds in the first few years of life they develop what's known as attachment disorder. Believe or not, humans have to be taught how to love!"

She allowed herself a laugh then, but I didn't find any humour in it. The ache in my heart was steadily getting stronger the more I heard.

"But his parents... they must have loved him in their own way!" My voice cracked with an emotion I wasn't expecting.

"The McCanns?" She snorted like I'd said something preposterous. "Like I said the mother was an addict and his father was a violent, abusive man. His brother was brought up in the family business and he was very much his father's son. Van was probably being taught how to load a gun when most little boys were getting their first train set. I don't think that boy ever saw anything even close to love... not even for one day of his life."

I wasn't prepared for the feelings that ripped through me, I almost felt physically winded and my unemotional facade slipped. Andrea's eyes narrowed at me.

"You look a little peaky. Do you want a glass of water?"

"No... errr no I'm fine, honestly. Carry on... please."

Andrea's eyes lingered on me just a fraction too long, and I could feel the guilt rising. I cleared my throat and let my head hang whilst I pretended to study the social services statement.

"There's not much more to tell really...." She lent forward, lowering her voice. "Don't go feeling sorry for him. He's good at what he does because he doesn't feel remorse."

"I don't feel sorry for him!" The words sprang from me forcefully, defensively. "I just know how it feels to lose a parent in such a brutal way... that's all."

"Yes I know all about that," Andrea said. "It's the age-old argument of nature versus nurture isn't it? Are people really born bad or does life just shape them that way? You can put two people through the same experience and they can react in totally different ways. Van chose this life. Your dad was murdered too but look how you turned out."

Yeah, a real upstanding and moral citizen...

"It's hardly the same is it?" I replied, knowing I sounded like I was defending him but not being able to stop myself. "He had nothing. At least I had family... my mum..."

"Like she was such a comfort to you when it happened!" Andrea's sharp and sarcastic tone cut me off and I looked at her, stunned. She looked shocked by the outburst herself, quickly back-tracking.

"Err... I didn't mean... I mean I shouldn't have said that..." She faltered, then put out a hand to rest on my arm which I hastily moved away. "I'm sorry but I read your file, your psych evaluations, your therapy sessions..."

I dropped the files on the desk, rising quickly to my feet, pushing the chair back forcefully across the floor with a screeching sound. "I suggest you do your job and read the criminals' reports, not the staff's!" I hissed.

"But... but I had to! When we had that data breach earlier in the year... all those files got accessed. It wasn't just the assignment files... they got into the personnel files too."

I'd already started to turn, but this statement stopped me in my tracks. I'd not heard of any data breach. "What are you talking about?"

Andrea's face looked stricken, like she'd said something she shouldn't have and had now been caught out. I glared at her, watched her squirm with unease.

"I'm guessing no one told you then..."

I took a step closer, my mind racing. "Told me what?"

She glanced around, uncomfortable, but I wasn't backing down. "Just tell me," I said sharply.

She sighed then, took a breath before the words tumbled out of her. "It was the worst breach we've had. Our network's supposed to have state of the art encryption too, it should be uncrackable, but somehow someone got in. They accessed all sorts, assignments, undercover agent information. It blew some of their covers wide open. Thankfully they managed to get them all out in time... but it could have cost lives. Remember that senior member of staff Eric suddenly leaving? Someone had to be made accountable. At least they didn't access too many of the personnel files..." she trailed off, eyes darting around before coming to rest on me again. "They got into your file though... they accessed the whole lot... everything. It was strange because none of the other agents were affected... it was only yours..."

I'd stopped listening at this point. Thoughts were thundering through my head as I stood motionless, mouth agape.

"Are you alright? I don't think Paul wanted to worry you..."

I ignored her, starting to back away before I quickly whirled around and made for the door, flinging it open. All I could picture in my head was Van, eyes burning into me with intensity whilst he spoke those three words.

"I know you..."

[handgiven]

TAG NINE PEOPLE YOU’D LIKE TO KNOW BETTER!

I. favourite colours: yellow & blue, especially when they occur together (like on van gogh's yellow house painting, or the siesta painting, or like when it's stormy and the sky is dark blue and grey, but the sun still shines on the yellowy buildings, or yellow acer leaves)

II. favourite flavours: palm sugar, pho broth, wild blueberries, masala chai, walnuts & honey, rosehip, elderberry

III. favourite genres: urban fantasy, queer & historical queer lit, poetry in prose, dystopian, philosophical, interviews with ordinary people & stories about ordinary people (bohumil hrabal, my beloved)

IV. favourite music: ambient, indie, folk, folk-punk, folk-rock, lo-fi (mostly i like anything that i can vibe with on account of the Vibes)

V. favourite movies: the fall (2006) -- it's so beautiful and it uses real locations and !!!!!! it's so good and sad and beautiful, maurice (1987) -- historical queer story with a happy ending, thank you mr e.m.forster o7, hombre mirando al sudeste (1986) -- philosophical scifi kind of thing it lives rent-free in my head, rent-a-neko (2012) -- "are you lonely? i'll rent you a cat.", jojo rabbit (2019), lola rennt (1998), mad max: fury road (2015), pride (2014), isle of dogs (2018), inside llewyn davis (2013), samotáři (2000)

VI. favourite series: in the flesh (2013), firefly (2002), the good place (2016-2020), attack on titan (still haven't seen the last two episodes, so no spoilers haha), the magicians (2015-2020), crazy ex-girlfriend (2015-2019), black books

VII. last song: radio by fred again.. & brian eno

VIII. last series: genuinely do not recall, but it might be good omens season 2, i just didn't have time to watch anything else since that came out

IX. last movie: blow-up (1966)

X. currently reading: lots of things started, none finished, but i do carry 'matter & desire' by andreas weber wherever i go these days s o i guess that; i am also listening to vonnegut's mother night as an audiobook :')

XI. currently watching: trying to listen to wtnv for the 5142952 time

XII. currently working on: art project for uni, deep-cleaning up my living space for the first time in months, trying to sort through my drafts & asks so it's all manageable

tagged by: stolen from @chiefofstafftanner tagging: @spookyagentfmulder @beyondthescully @talentforlying @shilohgreen @void-foxy @primordialchoice @amischiefofmuses @ravmalakh && anyone who sees this and is intrigued enough .) (also all you tagged people do feel free to ignore this, i appreciate you either way !!)

[booman86]

Jungle Queen Griep in Greip vs Skyscraper

When word gets the news about an uncharted Island called Savage Island. A lot of billionaires decide they should explode this island for its research. Many had tried to research on this island, but those who still put on this island I never returned. But one billionaire decided that he is going to make a profit off this island. As years went by, a young billionaire named Thomas Davis who is the owner of a powerful company called Global-Tech Enterprises. Thomas has been sending many drones to Savage Island to collect data and study its landscape and its environment. But only one particular day, Thomas drone had discovered something living on Savage Island. He couldn't put two and two together but on the video he sees a large figure moving through the jungle. "Call Dr William," said Thomas.

Two days later Dr William was contacted by Thomas. Thomas explains to Dr William about what he discovered on Savage Island. Dr William watch the video very closely, he noticed the large figure in the video has a feminist body. She has blazing red hair down her back. While she was muscular, she still had a very feminine body adorn with scars signifying that she had been in battle before. She stood over 120 tall and was wearing a tiger skin two-piece outfit. "Fascinating," said Dr William and he looked excited. "You know what this is?" asked Thomas. "Yes. This species we are looking at right now. Is none other than a Gigantitan." said Dr William. "A Gigantitan?" said Thomas as he looked confused.

Dr William began to explain to Thomas about the Gigantitan. He explains to him that the Gigantitan have been around since the beginning of mankind. He believed that the Gigantitan could have evolved for humans in 10,000 B.C doing the Paleolithic Period. "This is very rare. We must head to this island and catch this Gigantitan alive and bring it back so we can show the world that we discover." said Dr William. "Are you kidding me! How in the world are we going to be able to catch something like that!" said Thomas. But Dr William has an idea. He convinced Thomas to hire a mercenary, and use his technology that his company made to catch Greip. "I like that idea. Spread the news, to any mercenary the payment is going to be $400,000. If they're able to catch this Gigantitan they're going to get paid 10 times more than double," said Thomas.

A few weeks fast passed since Thomas was looking for some mercenary for hire. Unfortunately luck will smile upon him, as a young woman with long blonde hair appears. "I am looking for Thomas Davis," said a young woman. One of the security guards contacted Thomas and informed him that someone is interested to see him. "Let her in," said Thomas.

He was busy having her breakfast in bed. As he was eating, the young woman had just walked in with a News Paper. "Good-morning Mr. Thomas," said the young woman. So I see you're interested in the job" said Thomas. "Let's just say you caught my attention. But first let's get down to business," said the young woman. Thomas answers the young woman for her name. It turns out her name is Robin Grant, a.k.a Skyscraper. She was once a scientist who worked for the government on a secret project called Project Ultra. The purpose of Project Ultra was trying to replicate the natural super powers of Ultrawoman. After unlocking some of the basics of Ultrawoman’s super powers, for maximum efficiency and security the scientists were split into two separate groups with no direct contact with each other. This was in case some unforeseen circumstances happened to one of the labs; the other lab could continue the work. Good thing there were two labs because the first lab was destroyed and the Ultra powered researcher Dr. Andrea Van was taken into custody.

One of Robin’s main duties was to make sure all the data is backed up, she made a copy for herself right before she were to be experimented on. Since the human body was not good at retaining the energy that gave Ultrawoman her powers, the scientist tried to compensate for that but things didn’t work out as they planned. The second the scientists started the experiment, things went wrong. Robin’s vitals immediately went off the chart, they though that part was normal due to the nature of the powers of Ultrawoman. The next thing the scientist’s saw was Robin unexpectedly starting to grow in height. Robin outgrew the small containment room she was in and once that failed, the energies filled the room and overloaded the computers and equipment. With the equipment exploding all around them and a growing researcher, the scientists tried to escape but a very large explosion rocked the facility.

Realizing with her new found power Robin uses a powerful evil as many criminal organizations hire her to do their dirty work. Thomas explains to Robin about the information he found on Savage Island. He showed Robin the video of a giant woman with fiery red hair. He explained to Robin this video is a living proof of a Gigantitan and he wants her to travel to Savage Island to capture her. "You must be joking right. Do you have information where she's located on this Island?" said Robin. "Don't worry about it. I have my drone to follow every move she makes," said Thomas. "That's not the main problem. The problem is that you want me to go to an uncharted Island to catch this Gigantitan," said Robin.

"Look, this might be tough right now. But with my technology. You will be able to track her down with ease," said Thomas. He began to show off his technology to Robin. You use one of your satellites to scan the island as he tracked down the Gigantitan he's looking for. "Look! This is the area where she used to be. This area must be her territory, because she hasn't left this area in a week," said Thomas. "Move over," said Robin and she began to use her knowledge on computers. Thomas is amazed seeing how skilled Robin is as he watches her use his satellite. She began to scan in closer as she took a good look at this young Gigantitan. "Fiery red hair, tiger skin outfit and body cover and battle scar." said Robin. "Okay then. If you want me to catch her. You're going to pay me 20x more. And this technology you got, it needs some update," said Robin. "Hmm this might bring in more money," said Thomas. "If I can capture this Gigantitan. The world will pay me double to see her!" Thomas then gets up and heads over to her closet. "If you need any muscle to help you on this journey. I can hire some free poacher" said Thomas..

In the next couple of days Robin along with several workers get numerous boxes some full of weapons and others full of supply's loaded upon her ship, a large White 250-meter long 80.5-meter-high Yacht like boat. "Let's go, people! Time is money! Get this stuff on the boat!" she yelled out to her crew. As she gets on her boat she sees several people prepping the ship and. While everyone is boarding the ship, Dr William decides to come alone. "This will be fascinating. Now I can get to study a Gigantitan and their habitat" said Dr William. The Whistle then blows as the ship then leaves the harbor.

SOMEWHERE IN THE SOUTH SEAS 2 DAYS LATER

Robin had been eyeing a map with several other crewmates that worked for her. "Miss Robin, where exactly are we going?" asked one of the sailors. "We're close. Head south-west." said Robin. "Ma'am there on land south-west for thousands of miles." said another sailor "We can't go sailing blind like this there's probably nothing out there," said another sailor. "Then you've nothing to lose." responded Robin. It had been over a few days until one of the crew members had rushed over to her. Miss Robin! We've arrived!" said the crewmember.

Robin then walks out and then sees the island.There it is Savage Island," said Jessica. "So, what's so special about this place?" asked one of the men on the ship. "There's been stories about Gigantic creatures that roam the island," said Robin. "And among them is a Gigantitan. A fascinating creature who hasn't been seen in decades," said Dr William. The crew then handed out several guns and munitions due to Savage islands rumored fearsome inhabitants that dwell there. Robin along with 50 armed mercenaries had all gone into a Van sized Hovercraft and had made their way to the side of the island. On the way they managed to follow a river through the jungle. Several multicolored bird-like creatures were seen flying throughout the foliage. "What the heck are those things?" asked the mercenary. "Archaeopteryx a genus of bird-like dinosaurs'' said Dr William "Dinosaurs?" asked one of the mercenaries. "Savage Island was quite known for its prehistoric life according to the legends," said Dr William.

Savage Island

The group then lands over by a lake and then goes on to explore more of the island. Just then, a loud inhuman groan was heard. "What the hell?" said one of the mercenaries. "What in god name is that!?" asked another mercenary. Everyone then gets their guns ready and prepares for the worst. "It's coming from over there, keep your guns ready!" shouted Robin. They then see a group of Dinosaurs that resemble a cross between the Stegosaurus and the Kentrosaurus but with a Violet color scheme to them. "Is that a dinosaur!" said one of the mercenaries. "It's a herd of Dinosaurs!" said Dr William. "Amazing if I could only bring back one of those things alive. I could sell it in the black market" said Robin to herself. Not too far from the herd of stegosaurus like Dinosaur, they then spot a group of massive hairy creatures that resembled modern pachyderms. "Are those Woolly Mammoths over there!?" asked one of the mercenaries. "This is crazy!" said Robin.

As they continued, they see much more of Savage Island's menagerie of wild life Dinosaurs as well as Prehistoric mammals living together. While sightseeing they have then come across a massive 20 foot long Monitor Lizard known as Megalania. "Jesus can't we catch a break on this island!?" said Robin. She and the mercenary get their guns out and proceed to fire upon the Megalania. "OPEN FIRE!” shouted Robin. However, the creature’s skin was far too thick to penetrate with regular bullets. The Massive lizard swung its tail and knocked away several sailors. While this was going on a large figure who was sleeping nearby had managed to pier over a nearby hillside and see what was going on. The Megalania then stops in its tracks when it sees what is in front of it. The mercenary then looks at what stopped the giant 20-foot lizard. It had green eyes and green hair. It possessed strange markings on its shoulders and belly; it wore a light blue two-piece and stood over 80 feet tall! Everyone then sees the second creature and notices that it resembles a 13-year-old girl! "What the hell!?" screamed one of the mercenaries. "That Gentlemen is the lost species of hominid known as Gigantitan," said Dr William "So who's she supposed to be?" asked Robin "I thought Gigantitan was supposed to be bigger". said Robin. "No. She is just a juvenile," said Dr William. The Giant Girl then roars (very meekly) at the Lizard. "Me Thea!" She howled. "So that's not Greip but Thea?" asked one of the mercenaries. "You think she's connected to this Greip thing?" asked another mercenary. Just as Thea and the Lizard were about to fight, The Lizard then winds up being attacked and snatched up by a much larger creature. The creature was well over 100 feet long and 130 feet tall towering over Thea. It resembled a Tyrannosaurus Rex but far larger with green skin. The Savagesaurus Rex had arrived, and it was hungry!

"This day just gets better and better," said Jessica sarcastically. As the Savagesaurus Rex had just finished eating the 20-foot lizard. Thea upper lip curled up, allowing her to expose her teeth and fangs. The Rexes sneered in contempt, deeming her a threat not to take lightly. In defiance, Thea raised her arms and pounded her brawny fists against her chest as she slammed both fists into the ground. "It seems both Thea and the young Rex are juvenile," said Dr William. "How can you tell?" said Robin. "A young Tyrannosaurus Rex has long legs," said Dr William. Thea fist impact had caused Robin and the mercenary to fall to the ground. The Rex opened its massive maw; ready to snap them shut on Thea neck and rip out her windpipe but was met when Thea whirled to the side and a large; fist slammed itself into the side of the Rex head. The dinosaur veered sideways but pivoted to turn and face Thea, who was advancing fast for a quick follow-up. She had just gotten close when the young Savagesaurus Rex met her with a powerful tail-swipe. It hit her full in the ribs and knocked her sideways, allowing the young Rex to turn back around and greet her with a mouthful of teeth. A large hand met its jaw and slammed it shut, forcing the beast head up as the aforementioned hand wrapped around the young Rex's neck to hold the now-struggling dinosaur back. The young Rex thrashed wildly, trying to move its head closer to Thea and take a chunk out of her, but Thea arms were doing their job well to hold it back.

As the young Rex struggles to snap its jaws at her. Thea then latches her teeth around young Rex's small arm and then rips it clean off. "Holy SHIT!" said one of the mercenaries. The young Rex rears in pain, letting out a loud scream. Thea takes this opportunity to uppercut her adversary making it fall on its back. Thea immediately tackles the Meat eater to the ground, but the young Rex quickly kicks her off with its incredible hind leg strength, but Thea was able to circumvent this by injuring one of its legs. As the young Rex attempted to get up, Thea grabbed its skull from behind and beat the reptile's head, shattering many of its teeth. The young Rex attempted to thrash Thea off to the end when she snapped its jaws.

"Jesus," said a mercenary. "She learns that from someone?" said Dr William "Yeah no kidding, she took out those big lizards like it was nothing to her!" said the other mercenary. "It would take an army to bring her down!" said one of the mercenaries. "Well then that's why I paid you all for it!" said Dr. William.

But unknown to Thea the two parents of the young Rex slowly walk towards Thea with hunger in their eyes. "It seems like these two are the young Rex parents," said Dr William. As the Rex closed in, these jaws open wide and ready to make Thea their next meal. Suddenly a humanoid fist blindsided the titanic reptile, plowing the Rex's lower jaw into the ground. The Rex raked the ground, flattening small trees and splitting a nearby path asunder. The massive reptile dug its powerful legs into the ground, prompting the titan to rise erect off the ground.

Thea turns around to see an unfamiliar person standing behind her. A massive, humanoid beast landed between the Rex and Thea. She has blazing red hair down her back. While she was muscular, she still had a very feminine body adorn with scars signifying that she had been in battle before. She stood over 120 tall and was wearing a tiger skin two-piece outfit. "It's her, that Greip!" said Robin.

Yes, it was Greip in all of her glory. She saw the Savagesaurus Rex and immediately wanted a fight. Greip’s upper lip curled up, allowing her to expose her teeth and fangs. The Rexes sneered in contempt, deeming her a threat not to take lightly. Greip let out a huge roar as one of the Savage Rex charged to attack Greip. Greip fist slammed lf into the side of Rex's head. The dinosaur veered sideways, but pivoted to turn and face Greip, who was advancing fast for a quick follow-up. She had just gotten close when the Savagesaurus Rex met her with a powerful tail-swipe. It hit her full in the ribs and knocked her sideways, allowing the Rex to turn back around and greet her with a mouthful of teeth. A large hand met its jaw and slammed it shut, forcing the beast head up as the aforementioned hand wrapped around Rex's neck to hold the now-struggling dinosaur back. The Rex thrashed wildly, trying to move its head closer to Greip and take a chunk out of her, but Greip's arms were doing their job well to hold it back.

While the fight was going on the second Savagesaurus that had Thea cornered had then heard the commotion going on had then left to help its compatriot. “Looks like Greip is going to be double teamed” said one of the mercenaries. Thea then saw the Savagesaurus getting ready to attack Greip from behind. “Mama! Look out!” Thea screamed. Robin looked on in amazement as they just heard her speak! “So, she can talk!?” said Robin. '`Greip is that girl's mother!” said another mercenary.

Greip kicks one of the Rexes off her and tackles the second one. As the Rex struggles to snap its jaws at her. The giant then latches her teeth around the Rex's small arm and then rips it clean off. The Rex rears back in pain. Greip takes this opportunity to uppercut her adversary making it fall on its back. Greip then proceeds to grab a nearby boulder and slams it repetitively onto the reptile's head until it stops thrashing about. She then turns his attention to the second Rex. Greip immediately tackles the Meat eater to the ground but The Rex quickly kicks her off with its incredible hind leg strength, but Greip was able to circumvent this by injuring one of its legs. As the Rex attempted to get up, Greip grabbed its skull from behind and beat the reptile’s head, shattering many of its teeth. The Rex attempted to thrash Greip off to the end, when she snapped its jaws.

"So that's how that girl knew how to fight," said Dr William. "She's no joke". As Robin looked on at Greip, she couldn't help but eye Greip's. "It's time to get our plan started," said Robin. William noticed something wasn't right with Robin as you kept stirring at Greip. "Something telling me you're not happy with what you see," said Dr William. "Please you think she's all that there because she got a little muscle on her body and little scar on her body," said Robin. "I would wreck her giant ass out" said one of the mercenaries.

"Mama!" yelled Thea in tears. Greip then sees her daughter running toward her for a hug. "Thea Ok?" asked Greip in a broken English dialect. "Me was scared Mama!" Said Thea whose head was buried under her mother cleavage. Greip then cares her daughter back into the jungle. After she leaves, Robin and her crew then come out from hiding. Robin who had just seen how Thea and Greip were close had then gotten a wicked look on her face. She had just found Greip's weakness.

"Boys," said Robin. "Get those two on to the ship, and try to find some other creatures," the sailors then carry out their orders as they take the remains of the two dead Savagesaurus while the others then go deeper into the jungle. "Oh, I got big plans for you Greip Big plans indeed," laughed Robin. After seeing Greip in action, Robin and her crew had just set up camp over one of the lakes on the Island. "Jesus that Greip chick seems to be the strongest thing in the world" said one of the mercenaries. "Yeah, no kidding, she took those two big lizards down like they were flies!" added another mercenary.

"It would take an army to bring that bitch down!" added another mercenary. Robin then stood up and faced her crew. "We don't need an army to bring her down," snapped Robin. "We know that she has a weakness" everyone then looked at her with confusion. "What weakness is that?" asked one of the mercenaries. "It's that brat of hers. Her name is Thea!" said Robin. "She would never let anything happen to her." Robin was not wrong, Greip was fiercely protective of her, willing to take the fight to anyone or anything that wanted to bring harm to Thea. "How are you going to get Thea away from her mother, and more importantly how are you going to take her down?" asked one of the mercenaries. Robin then brings out a box and opens it to reveal a collection of darts. "These special Tranquilizer darts here are filled with a sedative that's strong enough to take down 1,000 bull elephants, these should be enough to put Thea asleep" said Robin. "Now then you try to keep Thea away from her mother and bring her to the ship, leave Greip to me." with that said Robin and her crew then go on and carry out the plan.

Over at the waterfall near one of the rivers Robin then stumbled upon a river. Drinking the water to refresh herself. However, Robin was then interrupted, by the appearance of the jungle Queen herself Greip. Robin then hides under a nearby cave to avoid being spotted by Greip. "Jesus Christ she's even bigger up close!" said Robin to herself. Greip was a remarkable sight. Greip then crouches down and gets a drink from the lake.

As she continues to drink, Greip then notices something stuck in her bicep. (Where one of the Savagesaurus bit her) she then pulls out what appeared to be a tooth from the fight with the Savagesaurus. "Stupid lizard" grunted Greip "Greip strongest there is!" Greip tosses the tooth away (coated with Greip's blood) which lands near where Robin was hiding.

While Robin looks at the blood-coated tooth, she then sees Greip taking her two-piece off. "God Almighty!" said Robin as she saw the 120-Foot-tall Voluptuous Muscular Giantess stark naked! "Not bad for a jungle girl," said Robin. Greip then walks into the lake and goes underneath the waterfall. The cool soothing water felt nice against her bare skin. Greip started to massage her breast as the water cascaded off her body. As she continued to wash herself, Robin took out a sniper and arm at Greip. PAW! Robin fires a tranquilizer hitting Greip on the butt, but it didn't seem to affect Greip as she looked to see what hit her butt. "Dammit. I should have expected this for her. It seem like I had to use more tranquilizer to take her down," said Robin.

Meanwhile in the jungles, the mercenaries had just killed four giant Boars and had those roasting over a fire on a large manmade roasting spit. "There it’s all set," said one of the mercenaries. "This giant size barbecue will get Thea's attention," said another mercenary. "Let's just hope that it won't attract her mother, or we are all screwed," said another mercenary. Just then, loud thuds had been heard from the jungle. In addition, they were getting louder and louder. "Is it her!" said one of the mercenaries. "She must've smelled the bait!" said another mercenary. "Quick hide!" the crew did just that. As they had hid themselves, Thea had arrived on the scene sniffing the air. She then sees the four large Boars cooking. "Yum yum" said Thea licking her lips. Thea immediately takes the bait gobbling up the roasted meat. "She's taking the bait as planned," whispered one of the mercenaries. "Now's our chance." Seven of the mercenaries then pull out the guns that were loaded with the special Tranquilizer darts. They then proceed to aim at Thea. "Steady," said one mercenary. "Now!" shouted one of the mercenaries. Like clockwork, they opened fired and the darts had landed in Thea's skin!

"Ow!” hollered Thea as the darts hit her. "Keep firing!" shouted one of the mercenaries. "Thea angry!” yelled Thea. Thea then picks up a nearby rock and throws it at the mercenaries shooting at her. "Jesus that bitch isn't going down yet!?" asked one of the mercenaries. However, Thea continues to fight back until tranquilizers start to take effect as she slows down. "Mama!...Thea fe…el f..u..nn..y" Thea calls out albite weakly. Thea then falls over and her eyes close. “Ok she’s out cold” said one of the mercenaries. Just then, a large hover carrier then arrives and slides underneath Thea’s unconscious body.

“Ok let’s head back to the ship, I’ll call Robin up” said one of the crewmembers. With that said and done the mercenary then heads back to the ship with Thea in tow. One of them then pulls out a communicator to contact Robin. “Miss Robin, come in Miss Robin,” said the mercenary. “What is it?” asked Robin on the other end. “We have Thea and we’re heading back to the ship”. Answered the mercenary. “Excellent now we need to get Greip over here, leave that to me,” said Robin. “Waits are you sure?” asked the mercenary. “Trust me I've got a few new recruits to get her attention,” laughed Robin.

Soon Robin begins to grow bigger and bigger as she continues to grow her outfit begins to rip apart. Robin is wearing a red and black jumpsuit. Now reaching 100 ft tall. Skyscraper is ready to challenge Greip. Greip realizes an unknown scent as she begins to sniff the air. Skyscraper reveals herself as she challenges Greip to fight. Unfortunately to Greip she seemed a bit confused. She wondered who this woman is standing in front of her wearing a weird outfit. "You call yourself the Queen of this island. Let's see if you live up to that name," said Skyscraper. Greip shouted back "Me Greip. Me not weak". Skyscrapers just laugh at her. "Her intelligence is lacking. I'm sure she won't be a challenge for me," said Skyscraper.

But unfortunately, Skyscrapers spoke too soon as Greip charged at her and full speed. Greip swipe at Skyscraper but barely miss. Skyscraper was amazed to see Greip moving at that speed. Greip went in for another attack but this time Skyscraper counterattack as she punched Greip in the face. Greip back off for a minute as she stares at Skyscraper. "You might be strong. But you're no match for me," said Skyscraper. Skyscraper jumps out of the way as Greip tries to hit her once more but Skyscraper dodges.

Skyscraper then knees Greip in the stomach knocking the wind out of her. "Too slow" gloated Skyscraper. Skyscraper then knees into Greip's back causing the Jungle Queen to howl in pain. "Ha pathetic I thought you were this great Jungle Queen" snapped Skyscraper "But now you're just my bitch." Skyscraper then proceeds to toss Greip around like a rag doll. She later performs several wrestling moves on her from suplexes to clotheslines. Skyscraper seems to enjoy herself seeing Greip suffering. She began to make a mockery of Greip by telling her that she was nothing more than a joke and how she called herself Queen of the island. Greip slowly begins to get up but Skyscraper once again attacks Greip by kicking her in the face. "Me don't fe..e…l well," said Greip as she felt dizzy. "Ohh what's wrong. Not at your full strength like you usually be," said Skyscraper.

"Well I'll tell you a little secret. While you were busy washing yourself under the waterfall. I shot a little tranquilizer at you which you weren't paying attention," said Skyscraper. Greip began to feel dizzy right after she passed out. "This is Skyscraper. I have catcher Greip," said Skyscraper. "Roger that," said one of the mercenaries. Skyscraper tied up Greip to make sure she try anything funny. Once she was done tied Greip up. Skyscraper carry Greip back to the ship. "Hate to say this. But you're heavy as hell," said Skyscraper.

Meanwhile back at the ship, everyone is sitting up to leave the island. Thea was loading on the second ship as the crewman chained her up so she wouldn't be able to move. Skyscraper soon arrive with the biggest prize of all Greip. It didn't take her long enough to load Greip on ship while the crewman chained her up. "Make sure she chains up tight. We don't want her to top size the ship," said the captain. "She will be a problem," said Skyscraper. "How would you know?" asked Dr William. "Because I shot her with a full dose of two tranquilizers. She would still be out cool until we arrived back to America," said Skyscraper.

"Let's get off this prehistoric island," said one of the mercenaries. The two ships begin to leave Savage Island at the ship that sails back to America. Skyscraper meanwhile was getting in contact with Thomas over the computer to discuss her reward money. "Well, Mr. Thomas. I aspect my reward money once I arrive back to America," said Skyscraper. "You don't get money once I see proof you catcher that Greip," said Thomas. Skyscraper show him the proof that she catcher Greip. "Amazing. A lot of specimens of a Gigantitan," said Thomas. "I'm catch two. So, I'm bringing two of them back. I expect my reward to be double," said Skyscraper.

Angel Fall City

Over in a massive football stadium in Angle Fall City, Griep was fast asleep due to the constant drugging. Thomas then walks in where Greip was past out. "Everything is going according to plan," said Thomas. "And, you, my dear, are my greatest discovery!" Thomas places a hand on Griep's leg. Griep murmurs in her sleep as Thomas smiles. "Seems like to me you are really enjoying yourself," said Robin. "You're still under my payroll. Even though I already paid you the money I promised. I just kept you around just in case things don't go right," said Thomas. "You're afraid that she might break free," said Robin. Thomas just laughed at her "She wouldn't be able to break in chains. These chains I made out of titanic steel. Even her brute strength won't be able to break them chains," said Thomas.

Meanwhile, as the show is about to start Dr. William then greets everyone at the front entrance. "Ah, welcome everyone to the biggest discovery in history!" said Dr. William. "Please, please come on in." Everyone then goes inside the stadium and heads for their seats, while Thomas then goes backstage and checks on Greip. While backstage, He then sees Greip waking up! Greip groaned as she began looking around her in confusion. "Where..Greip at?" said Greip. "Ah, you're awake my dear," said Thomas. Greip snarled, tearing against her chains, albeit still weak. "Struggle all you like but you're not going to get out that easy," said Thomas. "I had these chains made out of titanic steel to hold you down." Greip glared at Thomas angrily. "Now get ready for your big unveiling," said Thomas.

As everyone was seated, Dr. William came up on stage. "Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls of all ages," Dr. William called to the crowd. "I have for you the greatest discovery in history, from the mysterious Savage Island she was a Queen, now she is here before you a living remnant of the past! I give you the hominid known as Gigantitan, Greip!" The currents then rose up and to everyone's amazement, Greip was standing in a cage in chains. Greip the bellows in anger, The once-mighty Queen of Savage Island now on public display for all to ridicule. The flashing of cameras angered her, as did the shouts of the crowd. She had to get free! She put all her force into tearing at the chains but could not so much as move. Greip once again let out a mighty roar of fury at her situation before relaxing, having exhausted herself. "Oh my god!!" said one of the patrons. "This can't be real," said another patron. "Look at the size of her!" another patron called out. "DAMN THAT GIRL BE THICC!!!" said another patron eyeing her cleavage and hips. As the camera flashes continued Greip had continued to get even angrier. So much so that the next tug she did on her chains they were torn from the ground, setting the massive redhead loose.

Greip let out a huge roar as she ripped through the cage. As the audience begins to run in fear Greip continues to go on the rampage as she destroys the giant TV monitor. Now that Greip is on the loose she began to sniff the air. Dr William realize Greip you trying to pick up Thea scent. "Robin, I need you to stop her," said Dr William. "I already did my job catching her. But if you want me to, you need to pay me double," said Robin. "Ok fine. I'll pay you $60,000,000 to recapture her," said Thomas. Robin begins to grow to 100 ft tall ripping her normal clothes off to show she is wearing her red jumpsuit under her normal clothes. "Time to show this jungle bitch who the real Queen is," said Skyscraper.

Downtown City

Meanwhile Greip is running through the city as she continues to track Thea scent. Greip looked around as she began to get confused from the strange activity going on around here. Greip couldn't focus on herself as she tried her best to feel and Thea. "I found you," said Skyscraper.

Skyscraper swings her giant fist at Greip, who is able to dodge it and uses the opportunity to punch Skyscraper in the back of the head. Skyscraper falls to the street with a crash as people scatter away to safety. Skyscraper gets back to her and lunges at Skyscraper in anger, grabs her by the waist and tackles her to the ground. The ground shakes as the two giant lands fall to the ground. Greip pushes the way up, interlocks her hands together, and then slams her fists on Skyscraper back. This sends Skyscraper falling into the ground and slamming into the sidewalk. Greip lifts her leg up and prepare s to stomp on Skyscraper, but she rolls out of the way and dodges the attack. Grabbing onto a nearby building, Skyscraper lifts herself back up to her feet.

"All right, jungle girl, no more misses, nice woman," said Skyscraper. "Me not girl," said Greip. Greip quickly charges in again and punches Skyscraper but is countered by another punch. Skyscraper kicks Greip with her left foot, sending Greip crashing down onto into a building. The jungle Queen gets up, races forward and delivers a double-fisted overhead punch to Skyscraper, then punches her two more times before tossing her onto the ground behind her. Greip then prepares to stomp on the giant villain.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" sream Skyscraper. Skyscraper uses one of her devices to electrocute Greip, giving her a chance to get back on her feet. Skyscraper begins to approach Greip, who picks up and throws a small building at her. Although the pointed antenna stabs her in the shoulder, Skyscraper catches the building with both her hands, and breaks it in half with her knee. Afterward, Skyscraper proceeds to pick up two buses and strikes Greip in the head with them until they are smashed to pieces. Skyscraper then grabs onto Greip and slams her face into a building twice. The first push damages it and the second knocks it over. Skyscraper then grapples and tosses Greip over her, knocking her into another small building on her back.

"You call yourself a Queen? I fought stronger opponent than you," said Skyscraper. As Greip tries to get up, Skyscraper puts her foot down on her, pinning Greip to the ground. Greip grabs onto Skyscraper leg and sinks her giant fang into her leg, causing her to scream in pain, shattering several windows. Angered, Skyscraper grabs a nearby chimney and slams it into Greip head causing her to let go and fall to the ground, creating a shockwave in the process. Greip then grabs a nearby building and stabs Skyscraper in the leg, causing the Giantess to stumble backward. This allows Greip to get to her feet, jump in the air, and punch Skyscraper in the face.

Skyscraper grabs Greip by her hair, pulls her back and throws her down the street. Greip stumbles backwards and falls to the ground. Skyscraper grabs Greip legs and begins to spin her around in a circle before throwing her into a building. As Greip struggles to her feet, Skyscraper walks over to her and lifts up a small building, prepared to drop it on her. Greip then pulls her feet back and kicks Skyscraper in her stomach, causing her to stumble backwards. This gives Greip her chance to get to her feet, runs towards Skyscraper and punches her in the face. This makes Skyscraper drop the building she was holding on to her foot, making her jump up and down in pain as she holds her injured foot. Meanwhile in a helicopter Thomas Davis along with a pilot flying above the two giantesses. He hired a sniper shooter to shoot Greip with a tranquilizer. "We need to get closer to the one with the red hair," said Thomas. "Are you insane? We would end up getting crushed," said the Pilot.

Growling in anger, Skyscraper rushes at Greip when her back is turned and tackles her to the ground. The Two women began rolling around in the street, struggling with each other to try and land a punch to the other. Greip then gets on top of Skyscraper, but she is kicked off of her into the air, falling onto a nearby restaurant. Greip gets to her feet and sees that her hair is covered in condiments. She shakes her hair clean, while the crowd laughs at her new look. Enraged, Greip charges at Skyscraper, who at first looks frightened, but then runs at her too. They both prepare to punch each other, and both land the blow at the same time. Their blows send both giant women falling backwards and crashing to the ground and creating a cloud of dirt. When Skyscraper regains her sight, she notices that Greip is gone. She gets to her feet and starts looking for her. "Where are you little pest, where did you go," said Skyscraper.

Unnoticed by her, Greip is on top of a nearby building after climbing up. She gets to the far edge of the building where Skyscraper is and whistles at her. When Skyscraper turns around, she notices Greip right as she jumps from the edge of the building landing right on top Skyscraper knocks the wind out of her and sends her falling to the ground. Skyscraper kick Greip off her. Greip grabs a crane with a wrecking ball and garbage truck to use as weapons and Skyscraper grabs a streetlamp and street sign. Greip begins to spin the wrecking ball as Skyscraper begins to swing the lamp and signs at her, while she uses the truck as a shield. Skyscraper lands a hit on Greip head and uses the street sign to knock the truck out of her hand. Greip then use the opportunity to throw the wrecking ball at Skyscraper head twice. She tries to do it again, but Skyscraper catches the ball in her hand and crushes it with. "Uh-oh," said Greip.

"Oops I'm sorry for breaking your little toy," said Skyscraper. Greip prepares to land a punch, but Skyscraper catches her fist before grabbing her arm, flipping her over her shoulder and throwing her to the ground. Skyscraper then grabs both of Greip arms, pulls her back up and kicks her in the back to a building. Greip grabs the parts of the building and throws them at Skyscraper, one piece hits her and the other she catches, but before Greip punches her in the cheek. Skyscraper falls to the ground and Greip jumps into the air to deliver the final blow. But Skyscraper we're able to move out of the way as Greip punched the ground so hard causing a massive earthquake. Skyscraper snuck up behind Greip putting her in a chokehold. "I never expect someone like you to give me trouble," said Skyscraper. With all her might, Greip tries her best to get free, but Skyscraper continues to hang on tight. Meanwhile Thompson in the helicopter flew around Greip so he could get a good aim to fire the tranquilizer. "Keep her steady," said Thompson. The sniper aims his gun as he has a good clear shot to shoot Greip. Out of nowhere a giant hand grabbed the helicopter and the sniper fired the tranquilizer. The tranquilizer hit Skyscraper in the arm causing her to release Greip. "That idiot Thompson," said Skyscraper as she began to feel dizzy. Greip sees her opportunity as delivering a powerful uppercut knocking Skyscraper out cold.

"Well that was a close one," said Colossa. Greip was confused at first until she recognized Kaila standing by Colossa. "Good thing one of your friends contacted us about the situation," said Kaila. Greip was happy to see her old friend along with Thea who was in safe hands with Kaila. "Mama" said Thea as she hugged Greip. The mother and daughter finally reunited, but for Thompson he has to answer to the police for his illegal activity and going to the island for smuggle the dinosaur off the island and try to sell the animals to the black market. As for Skyscraper a special military squad arrested her for her legal activity on Savage Island and kidnapping Greip and Thea. "You think the prison cell is going to hold me. I'll break out," said Skyscraper. "Sorry Angela but we're going to make sure you're not going to break out this time," said one of the police.

A couple weeks have passed and Greip and Thea are back on Savage Island. Greip is relaxing under a tree as she enjoys eating a nice meal of bananas.

The End

[hel-phoenyx]

TW death, graphic description of a body and implied child abuse/suicide attempt

Nicomaque, Aristophane and Andreas are @soupedepates 's characters, Senri is @corneille-but-not-the-author 's

I knew the moment I parked in front of the building I would not like what was going to happen.

My day started normally, though. Going to teach, tease Senri on headmaster work, give to countless Ultimates a lecture on the power of imagination. Maybe spoil a little bit my baby daughters that are not babies anymore. A good day.

The fact it was a good day should have hinted at how weird it was.

And then Senri told me about Nicomaque's repeated absences. That it was three days since he hasn't come to the school. And that's where it hit me.

So that's why everything was so

Calm.

He was worried. Senri is among the rare people that can be worried about someone he knows no matter how much he doesn't like them. He may not care, but he notices, like he noticed my dark circles or Raraka's impending nervous breakdowns. Maybe that's why I love him, or why I started to worry, too.

He asked me to check. Of course. I am the only one that still has a key to his apartment. In case of suicide attempt or overdose.

So I put my classes on hold and decided to check.

The building was normal. No accident, no disaster whatsoever.

Only the flies on the window.

Everywhere.

Blocking life light

Obscuring the inside like a cross.

I knew I would not like what I was gonna see.

I am no idiot

I am no optimistic fuck

I am no stranger to Tragedies.

I took out my phone, got out of the car. Dialed the emergency number.

The voice resonates in my head like an echo of the outside world. The world where there's no flies on the window of that guy I am the only person with the keys to his house, the guy I hate so much I know his body and mind by heart the guy that almost got my sister's lover killed pulled me away from the roof tried to make me relapse in my addictions couldn't even leave his.

"Yes, thank you for responding. I call about potential corpse identification."

The words taste like decay in my mouth.

Of course I didn't like what I saw.

Flies are not an unusual sight for people that knew Maquo's way of life. He never knew how to take care of himself. At some point, he stopped trying. Not even for his child's sake.

For whom would he?

Not even to appear at least a little like a human being.

What is the point of looking human if you aren't?

But that many are not only from his trash bin, or the dirty dishes in the sink starting to grow moldy.

I lead the policemen towards his room. Some of them flinch in front of the mess.

"Does that guy really... live in that dump?"

I suspected not anymore.

Behind the smells of mold and old meals and booze lies a stench of decay recognizable like no other. The overwhelming fist of death.

How long...

"How long will you lay in your own crap with no one to ever worry about you?"

"Eh now, van Heel, now that's just harsh, I do not lay, look, I am standing. Besides, you worry, or you wouldn't be here."

"You're being a bit full of yourself if you don't think the only thing I worry about is the safety hazard you live in."

"Aww. Tsundere."

"Laugh all you want. We'll see when you're dead."

Finally a policeman opened the door. I put in a mask.

That was a good idea.

The smell is everywhere. Flies buzzing like crazy around a form on the bed, probably a factor of what accelerated the decay. Because I remember seeing him five days ago at school coughing his lungs out so hard every cough got out a cloud of smoke. But he was still coughing, still laughing, still breathing.

What is in front of me does not breathe, does not cough, does not try to kiss me with a breath of fags and booze. Whatever lies in that bed is not the thing that would sass me with whatever unethical thing I would be doing according to non-existent Lord knows what philosopher guy before pulling out a beer and asking if I want some.

What is in front of me is just a lump of flesh white as death, eyes closed and mouth full of eggs that once called itself Nicomaque Papoulos.

I told him once he would die before me. I would have the last laugh when he's dead.

I do not laugh.

"Sounds like a liver failure, says a policeman while inspecting the bed. No traces of violence, no signs of overdose, only... The bottles."

"The bottles" describing a pile of glass stinking like cheap whiskey and vodka. Yeah, that sounds about right. Of course his body would break down first.

"You're a fucking living wreck. I don't know what will get you first, liver failure or brain death."

"How about neither?"

You wish.

"Need me for authentification?" I asked a policewoman. She shook her head.

"No, you did enough, you can go out for a minute. Since it's not murder, your deposition can wait. Please give me your contact info."

I comply, and go out without a look towards the corpse.

"Hey, Andreas, Emerens calling."

On the other side of the phone I hear a little gasp of surprise. To be fair, we haven't spoken in a long time. Not since he found a job, got into active life, started therapy for good. We sometimes exchange news on social media. Nicomaque's name is never spoken.

"What do you want?"

"I have news for you."

I don't intend to sugarcoat it. I may be out, standing next to the family car with the sun kissing my skin, but death is still gripping at my clothes like a fervent lover not wanting to let go. Everything is starting to give me a headache. And it's only the beginning.

"What could possibly earn me a call from-"

"He's dead."

Andreas stops in his tracks. He didn't need to hear a name to understand.

"He..."

"Found him this morning. Since three or four days apparently, police will tell me, I am no coroner. Liver failure."

There is a long silence. A silence broken by a nervous laugh I can hear so much behind.

"Of course.... Of course that MOTHERFUCKER got the most alcoholic death possible! Goddamnit couldn't he just, I don't know, get shot or whatever???"

"Would you take a bullet for a student?"

"Lord, no. Don't tell that to Pontiff though. I kinda need the job."

"Figured. And he's not stupid, he knows. But what if the student was your own child?"

"..."

"I find you suddenly silent."

"Well what am I supposed to answer?"

"And of all people YOU had to warn me, you who pretends to hate him all day long but I know damn well what you really think, you fucking hypocrite-"

I let him shout at me for a moment before taking advantage of a moment of silence, he taking his breath to shout, shout again maybe

He was so silent linked to monitors, his heart stabilised but his blood oxygen so low. Of course, blood loss does that to people and I know that all too well. I recognise the scars on his arms because the same are hidden behind tattoos and colors.

I never hated Nicomaque more than at this moment.

"Are you finished?"

He stops in his tracks, now dead silent. I guess he never heard me snapping before today.

I sigh before starting over, my voice far more composed than before.

"You do whatever you want with that info. Organize the funeral or shit in his grave, I dont give a fuck, only thing I will ask you is to give me Eudoxe's number so I can warn him. Or do it yourself if you want. I don't care."

He doesn't ask why I have only his. We both remember.

He's pale on the bed and I'm sitting next to him, when finally visits are allowed. In his hand is a little paper with numbers marked on it.

"In case of emergency."

Andreas stays silent for a moment. Before sighing.

"You're doing an awful lot for an archnemesis."

A crooked smile grows on my lips.

"I know. Pathetic isn't it?"

Neither of us know who I'm talking about.

Three knocks on the door in a well-known code. I've been outside all day, calling Andreas then Eudoxe then Aristophane who was the only one asking about me, before telling me to rest because he will warn the others. I still haven't called Augusta and Otto. Something tells me neither of them would care.

So of course Senri should know it's me.

He still has the audacity to ask.

"Who's there?"

I grin.

"Your favorite errand doggie, sweetie. Care to let me in? I have news."

"Ah, there you are. Come in."

There is something in his voice that looks like worry. Why would he worry? I haven't been gone that long, only for most of the morning, I didn't even miss that many classes I shouldn't be the one he's worried about.

Senri is sitting in his chair looking at papers, the usual. Oh, the jokes I did about ruining Judge's little throne the only way I know how. But not today. Today is no day to joke.

He lifts his head hearing me coming, his eyes widening when he sees my face.

"So?"

My grin is almost believable.

"Well, I have bad and good news. The bad news is, you're gonna have to find a new philosophy and morale teacher."

Senri's eyes widen even more. He begins to stand up, silent, still looking at me at that grin who's so deep in my face I almost feel it bleed.

"Good news is.... "

I should be laughing.

"Is..."

I didn't even cry for my birth giver.

"..."

"Don't look so disgusted, van Heel. I know you're gonna cry on my coffin."

"HAH! You wish. Only thing I'd do when you're six feet under is throw a party."

....

What am I trying to say to myself.

"..... Never mind. There's no good news, after all."

I guess I wasn't as heartless towards you as I thought I was.

Senri is still looking at me. Gestures towards another chair, next to his desk, one I know by heart. The chair only I sat in, from what I've gathered. The chair of the assistant headmaster.

I sit in, and he turns towards me, eyes piercing whatever expression is on my face.

"So Nicomaque is dead."

"Yep. Organ failure. Since three days or so. Gave my statement to the police, nobody will be interrogated at Hope's Peak."

"At least that. How's the funeral going?"

"Gotta speak with Aristophane and Pericles but probably in Greece."

"And how are you feeling?"

He still looks at me. At the grin that didn't leave my face. My signature grin, the one used against me or for me so much during my social media life, the grin only a few people know is there for hiding.

I don't let go of it.

"I'll figure out later."

I have no time to explore whatever's in my brain right now.

Senri smiles a little. Of course he gives me that ironic look.

"And that suuuuure helped you cope."

I roll my eyes.

"Oh, fuck youuu."

"You wish. But seriously. You good?"

Again with that question.

"I don't know what am I supposed to feel."

There is one thing I like about Senri.

He doesn't give me an answer.

He doesn't try to tell me what I should feel.

He doesn't even say anything somehow judgemental.

He just stands up, and goes to put a hand on my shoulder.

Five seconds later, it becomes a hug.

What should I feel?

That's my worst enemy.

He became the deadbeat dad I was loathing.

He hurt so many of my loved ones.

And yet at the same time I looked at what we shared with such a fondness I don't find in any of my relationship.

I smile a little behind the brain fog.

I guess you did have the last laugh, you little piece of junk.

[joons]

Top 5 villains in the real life story of Elvis's life/legacy?

Tom Parker / Andreas van Kuijk

Everyone else pales in comparison. It's hard to convey the extent of his cruelty and control. He stymied Elvis professionally, creatively, and personally, sabotaging his opportunities, relationships, and interests. He knew how to make Elvis doubt himself, and absolutely everything that went wrong in Elvis' life can be traced back to Parker and the very deliberate way he isolated and undermined Elvis. There are no words. Bottomless hatred. Every day a new revelation.

Hal Wallis

Wallis was the producer of Elvis' films for Paramount. Despite being one of the first people to recognize Elvis' acting talent, Wallis made a choice to keep him in horrible roles because he didn't believe audiences would ever take him seriously. In a public interview, Wallis told the press that Elvis films were terrible but that he had to keep making them because they made enough money to finance artistic films for Paramount. It broke Elvis' heart. Wallis also impressed upon Parker that Elvis gaining any amount of weight was unacceptable, thus leading to Elvis developing an eating disorder where he would starve himself for weeks at a time.

Steve Dunleavy and the Bodyguard Book

In the last year of Elvis' life, his dad fired three of his close bodyguards/members of the Memphis Mafia: Dave Hebler, Sonny West, and Red West. Feeling hurt and disrespected, the three agreed to do interviews for a tell-all book by Steve Dunleavy. The three of them would later claim they only went to the press to douse Elvis with cold water about how bad they thought his drug habits had gotten, but even if that was the case, they had no business agreeing to work with someone like Dunleavy. Dunleavy was a favored reporter of Rupert Murdoch, who, I kid you not, hated rock 'n' roll so much that he commissioned a takedown of Elvis while he was still alive. Murdoch believed that taking Elvis down would generate enough discourse to keep some of his struggling papers in business, turning Elvis into a symbol of the lower classes who wasn't worthy of serious consideration as an artist or compassionate understanding as a human being. The bodyguards were paid for their interviews, and Dunleavy proceeded to use their quotes to write what Murdoch wanted: a scandalous, seedy tell-all that turned Elvis into an object of ridicule. Worse, of course, was that Elvis' friends were party to it; it led to so much stress, grief, and anger for Elvis in his final months. He worried constantly about it, afraid of what Lisa and his fans would think of him afterward. Elvis: What Happened? was published two weeks before his death and set the tone for a genre of Elvis muckraking that continues today.

Dee Stanley and Sundry

Dee was Elvis' stepmother, who married his father Vernon shortly after the death of Elvis' beloved mother, Gladys. There was always going to be friction between the two just based on the speed of the remarriage, but it didn't help that Dee had originally tried to seduce Elvis (nothing doing) before turning her attentions on his dad. Elvis never liked Dee, and the feeling became mutual. After his death, Dee published a memoir that was a near-complete fabrication, writing anything that she thought would disgrace Elvis. The worst claim she made was that Elvis and Gladys were incestuous. Several of Elvis' friends nearly punched her when they appeared in a room together for a television interview. Her sons were heavily influenced by Dee's perspective and have kept up the same escalating, baffling claims to make money.

Alanna Nash

Unfortunately a widely cited and respected Elvis researcher, Nash has such a willingness to entertain "new" stories about Elvis that she falls for hoaxes and lies on a regular basis. Sometimes she escapes criticism by presenting her books as "oral histories," essentially raw interviews with people who knew him, which at least mostly allows the reader to decide the veracity of each account for themselves. But she bolsters her other books with sketchy psychoanalysis and innuendo intended to smear her subjects, or at least generate some rumors that will grab headlines. For instance, she claimed to have unearthed a theory that Col. Parker left Holland because he committed a murder there. Sounds exciting and even plausible given his reputation, but digging into it, the evidence is so slim and sketchy that it could really only be published by someone like Nash, and only after his death. Another example is how credulously she treats Byron Raphael, a serial liar who claims Marilyn Monroe and Elvis Presley (who spoke for a total of three minutes in their lifetimes) had sex (which Byron got to witness, of course!) and that Natalie Wood had sex with Byron in the next room after Elvis couldn't "do" it for her. When a longtime Elvis researcher questioned the article Alanna wrote with Raphael for Playboy, she said, "If Bill Burk was critical of [Raphael's] integrity, I'd say that's because Bill was jealous he didn't find Byron first." Uh-huh.

About gossip involving Parker's possible murder, she said, "I want to be clear in saying that there is no hard proof that he committed this murder, [but] in my heart of hearts, I believe he did." In another interview, when questioned, she snapped that anyone who says she "accused him of murder can't read."

The biographer Albert Goldman is a lot worse than her, like, on every level, a truly vile, insane person who wrote screeds (they are not biographies, they are a cry for help) against both Elvis and John Lennon. But Alanna loves Goldman and cites him a lot, and she irritates me more because she has a better reputation than she deserves, while Goldman is widely considered to be a disgusting hack.

I could probably include a few others, but as much as I might dislike other people in the Elvis story, they get the benefit of the doubt from me because at least they aren't these folks.

[confusedbyinterface]

Is Pentiment a fair mystery?

I will not totally go into whether you could solve it (if you did, let me know!) but

(Pentiment spoilers follow, like this would blow the whole case open)

Knox's Commandments

"The criminal must be someone mentioned in the early part of the story, but must not be anyone whose thoughts the reader has been allowed to follow." For sure

"All supernatural or preternatural agencies are ruled out as a matter of course." Now here's a tricky one. Definitely while witchcraft comes up in both murders it's pointing to motive, not as a means. The real issue comes with Knox's "Father Brown" complaint: the supernatural shouldn't be used as a red herring because we know it's impossible. And, yes, a player in that mindset (or a rationalist Andreas) would think that of Amelie's visions: they prove she's got a direct connection to the crimes. Maybe I'm a fool but I didn't jump right to it.

"Not more than one secret room or passage is allowable" While technically two (at least), the first I'd say is more part of the evidence for the second. There's a perfectly good reason for the secret passages: the Romans built them and everyone just forgot

"No hitherto undiscovered poisons may be used, nor any appliance which will need a long scientific explanation at the end." I think we all understand how pulleys work

"No Chinaman must figure in the story." In terms of "don't just make the Sinister Foreigner the killer/red herring", for sure. Vaclav, Sebhat, and the Sommerfelds never come under suspicion

"No accident must ever help the detective, nor must he ever have an unaccountable intuition which proves to be right." Aside from Amelie happening to call out (is that even an accident? Let's say it is) or the standard "wow a murder happens every time you show up", no.

"The detective must not himself commit the crime." No he's not guilty he just has depression

"The detective must not light on any clues which are not instantly produced for the inspection of the reader." Nope.

"Watson" Magdalene, possibly?

"Twins" Apollo and Artemis may be mischievous but they aren't killers

Pretty good! The exceptions let both Knox and Pentiment come off well

Now for Van Dine who I expect will fare much worse

"The reader must have equal opportunity with the detective for solving the mystery. All clues must be plainly stated and described." Ok

"No willful tricks or deceptions may be played on the reader other than those played legitimately by the criminal on the detective himself." Yep. The only trick is the culprit directly lying to Andreas to throw him off the scent

"There must be no love interest. The business in hand is to bring a criminal to the bar of justice, not to bring a lovelorn couple to the hymeneal altar." Love is the only reason to do anything in this world, fuck you.

"The detective himself, or one of the official investigators, should never turn out to be the culprit. This is bald trickery, on a par with offering someone a bright penny for a five-dollar gold piece. It is false pretenses." Certainly

"The culprit must be determined by logical deductions—not by accident or coincidence or unmotivated confession. To solve a criminal problem in this latter fashion is like sending the reader on a deliberate wild-goose chase, and then telling him, after he has failed, that you had the object of his search up your sleeve all the time. Such an author is no better than a practical joker." Well, each murder has evidence but never 100% conclusive. As for the ending, they did logically conclude where the thread-puller is

"The detective novel must have a detective in it; and a detective is not a detective unless he detects. His function is to gather clues that will eventually lead to the person who did the dirty work in the first chapter; and if the detective does not reach his conclusions through an analysis of those clues, he has no more solved his problem than the schoolboy who gets his answer out of the back of the arithmetic." 100%, and process of elimination is logical

"There simply must be a corpse in a detective novel, and the deader the corpse the better. No lesser crime than murder will suffice. Three hundred pages is far too much bother for a crime other than murder. After all, the reader’s trouble and expenditure of energy must be rewarded." Oh, far more than one

"The problem of the crime must he solved by strictly naturalistic means. Such methods for learning the truth as slate-writing, Ouija-boards, mind-reading, spiritualistic séances, crystal-gazing, and the like, are taboo. A reader has a chance when matching his wits with a rationalistic detective, but if he must compete with the world of spirits and go chasing about the fourth dimension of metaphysics, he is defeated ab initio." As above, the supernatural is, seen rationally, the central clue to everything

"There must be but one detective—that is, but one protagonist of deduction—one deus ex machina. To bring the minds of three or four, or sometimes a gang of detectives to bear on a problem, is not only to disperse the interest and break the direct thread of logic, but to take an unfair advantage of the reader. If there is more than one detective the reader does not know who his coeducator is. It is like making the reader run a race with a relay team." It all depends on whether you see Magdalene as "the detective", frankly this rule is splitting hairs, if the brains trust is collaborating you get the same benefit as any one of them.

"The culprit must turn out to be a person who has played a more or less prominent part in the story—that is, a person with whom the reader is familiar and in whom he takes an interest." Not only that but you're present at the moment they decide to commit the crime

"A servant must not be chosen by the author as the culprit. This is begging a noble question. It is a too easy solution. The culprit must be a decidedly worth-while person—one that wouldn’t ordinarily come under suspicion." Passes but also fuck you

"There must be but one culprit, no matter how many murders are committed. The culprit may, of course, have a minor helper or co-plotter; but the entire onus must rest on one pair of shoulders: the entire indignation of the reader must be permitted to concentrate on a single black nature." This is a complicated one, I'd say it doesn't pass this rule but it works

"Secret societies, camorras, mafias, et al., have no place in a detective story. A fascinating and truly beautiful murder is irremediably spoiled by any such wholesale culpability. To be sure, the murderer in a detective novel should be given a sporting chance; but it is going too far to grant him a secret society to fall back on. No high-class, self-respecting murderer would want such odds." Definitely passes. The thread-puller has help but isn't some secret society leader

"The method of murder, and the means of detecting it, must be rational and scientific. That is to say, pseudo-science and purely imaginative and speculative devices are not to be tolerated in the roman policier. Once an author soars into the realm of fantasy, in the Jules Verne manner, he is outside the bounds of detective fiction, cavorting in the uncharted reaches of adventure." Again see above.

"The truth of the problem must at all times be apparent—provided the reader is shrewd enough to see it. By this I mean that if the reader, after learning the explanation for the crime, should reread the book, he would see that the solution had, in a sense, been staring him in the face—that all the clues really pointed to the culprit—and that, if he had been as clever as the detective, he could have solved the mystery himself without going on to the final chapter. That the clever reader does often thus solve the problem goes without saying." Oh, absolutely. The visions? The ongoing refusal to do foundation repair? The huge hole? Obvious clues when you know

"A detective novel should contain no long descriptive passages, no literary dallying with side-issues, no subtly worked-out character analyses, no “atmospheric” preoccupations. Such matters have no vital place in a record of crime and deduction. They hold up the action and introduce issues irrelevant to the main purpose, which is to state a problem, analyze it, and bring it to a successful conclusion. To be sure, there must be a sufficient descriptiveness and character delineation to give the novel verisimilitude." Fuck you.

"A professional criminal must never be shouldered with the guilt of a crime in a detective story. Crimes by housebreakers and bandits are the province of the police departments — not of authors and brilliant amateur detectives. A really fascinating crime is one committed by a pillar of a church, or a spinster noted for her charities." Mostly the case though you can easily blame Martin for everything

"A crime in a detective story must never turn out to be an accident or a suicide. To end an odyssey of sleuthing with such an anti-climax is to hoodwink the trusting and kind-hearted reader." They're all definitely killings

"The motives for all crimes in detective stories should be personal. International plotting and war politics belong in a different category of fiction — in secret-service tales, for instance. But a murder story must be kept gemütlich, so to speak. It must reflect the reader’s everyday experiences, and give him a certain outlet for his own repressed desires and emotions." I'd say so. It's a big motive touching on huge forces in the world, but this isn't about imperial or church politics, it's about a small village and how it sees itself.

etcetera. Well, the Martin bit edges against the "no doubles" but that's motive not means. And the letters aren't code, they're a bit cryptic but straightforward.

Surprisingly there was something interesting to say about Van Dine after all. I still don't like him though.

[happyspookysteamer]

Letters to a Friend

Chapter 5

At Elsbridge, James pestered Wallace about the letter again. They had just dropped off their train, and both crews brought their engines to an empty siding for their next job. The signal man ran down to tell them that they would be waiting a while to proceed to their next job because an engine came to a standstill on their line, probably because of the frost. Until the line is cleared, they won't be going anywhere.

It wasn't as cold as it was in the morning, but frost still covered the land. Bored and curious, James wanted Wallace to finally read the letter. He didn't have to tell the young man twice, as he was dying of curiosity as soon as the letter was given to him. He had skimmed through it, but when he got it from the station master, he really wanted to read the whole thing through with Vance and James. Wallace clambered clumsily off of the red engine’s cab and stumbled all the way to his front. This was quite normal for Wallace, so James and Vance were not surprised in the slightest. Vance sat on James’s buffer, and Wallace stood in front of the two. Holding the letter as if it were some sort of scroll that had a decree from the royal family or something.

He was about to start when he stopped and looked to the back of Edward’s tender that was parked in front of them. He pointed in a questionable manner, as if asking, 'Is he allowed to listen?' Before James or Vance could respond, Edward answered for them. Well, gentleman, if I am invading your privacy, I could move to another siding, but I can't help but be curious as well after you have told me about your endeavour, but I will respect your wishes either way". Wallace was startled; he couldn't find out how he knew what he was doing, and he looked around Edward’s tender, looking for another pair of eyes that the old engine may have hidden. Vance just facepalmed, and James tried to contain a wheeze. The driver looked at his engine and nodded. He doesn't mind Edward listening. James looked between him and Wallace for a moment. If an engine could shrug, he would have, but instead he asked, "Edward? Would you like to know what is in the letter?". The old engine responded politely. "I would be delighted. Thank you, James." With that, Wallace sat on James’s other buffer and read the letter to Vance and the two engines.

Hello and Good day from France!

My name is Andreas Stark; I am 15 years old and live in France. I want to introduce myself, Mr. Marshall, who is a 45-year-old driver originally from Marquise in the northern part of France, and my father, Claus Stark, who is 38 and is also the fireman of our old engine named Leonhard. Leon is a large black 0–10-0 goods engine called the K.BAY.STS.B. class G5/5. He is partially blind in one eye from the First World War, but he is really friendly and would not harm a fly. He likes to work hard, but that often leads to him overworking himself. We all work on a railway in the southern part of France in a place called Belfort, which is close to the Swiss border.

The circumstances under which your letter fell into our hands were completely coincidental. We took a mail train that day, and your letter has fallen out of the bag and onto the floor of the mail van. When I saw the address, I first brought the letter to our administrative office. They threw the letter away, but I picked it up. I don't know why, but now I am glad I did. When I read your letter, I was very pleasantly surprised and couldn't wait to show Leon and my father the letter. Leon was as happy about the letter as I was. I immediately asked my father if we could write you a letter. Getting paper and a pen was the easiest part. My father and I also speak pretty good English, and so does Mr. Marshall, but Leon does not, but he still helped with writing by coming up with ideas of what we could write.

When we finished the letter, the biggest problem was finding a way to mail it. That is where Mr. Marshall came in. Being good friends with a postman, he managed to get some stamps and an envelope in return for a favour in the future. Mr. Marshall also came with a camera that he owns and took a photo of us after we gave Leon a wash-down, which we attached to the letter before we mailed it. If you would like to send us letters in the future, we have put down Mr. Marshall’s address so that we can get the letters directly.

We really loved hearing about you and hope to get to know each other better. Leon wants to say that he would really love to be friends with you, and so would I. We don't have that many friends anymore due to us having to flee our home, and your letter gave us something to look forward to. The days can be quite hard and repetitive, but this is something new and nice for a change. We can't wait to hear from you, and we hope the three of you, Mr. Wallace Peterson, Mr. Vance Jordan, and Mr. James, have a wonderful day.

Sincerely,

Andreas and Claus Stark, Mr. Marshall, and Leonhard

"What a lovely letter," said Edward. Wallace was giddy, happy that his idea paid off and that he has a pen pal now. Even Vance had a soft smile. He took the letter from the jumping fireman. In the envelope was a black and white photo of a large goods engine as well as two men in the cab that he assumed were the driver and fireman, Mr. Marshall and Mr. Stark. Standing on the tender of the engine stood a boy, probably Andreas, waving his arms around from the looks of it. Vance held the picture up to James’s face. The red engine cracked a smile as well. ‘They look like a nice bunch,' he thought to himself.

Vance got up and gave Wallace the picture. The ecstatic fireman takes off with the photo to show it to Edward. James and Vance heard Edward chuckle. Vance looks up at James and says, "So, what do you think? Up for another letter tonight?" James thought for a moment. At first, he didn't think much of his fireman’s idea; it was just a way to pass the time, or so he thought. Now, miraculously, it actually has someone’s attention in southern France. They wrote back… So maybe they are genuine in their interest in a new friendship? He would just have to see. To him, it's still just a letter, but he is curious about them and would like to see where this goes. "Why not? I know Wallace would be upset if we didn't," said the red engine. "We would have to see about potentially getting stamps for our new friends over in France; they seem to have difficulties in that regard," noted Vance. James had no idea where to procure stamps, but Edward suddenly spoke up. "Howard collects stamps; I’m sure he has a few extras to spare if you ask." "Thanks Edward! I’ll be sure to ask when he is back!" shouted Vance to the front, so Edward could hear him while also making the red engine wince at his volume. James thinks that wasn't that necessary since he really believes that the old engine hears better than a bat.

After some time, Edward’s crew returned with food. Vance asked Howard about some spare stamps while the crew all headed inside the station to eat. Leaving the two engines alone outside in an awkward silence. For James, it had seemed to get a little colder. The cool breeze made the red engine shiver in his frame. James looked around, unsure of what to do, and the silence started to make him a bit uncomfortable. James, I can literally hear you tense up. What's wrong? Talk to me," said Edward gently, unable to look directly at him because of the way they were arranged. James stuttered for a moment, looking at Edward or his tender. "W-well I guess I am not used to the silence," he said, more unsure of himself than usual, which did not go unnoticed by Edward.

"You never had a problem striking conversation with engines in the past; what is so different now?" said the old engine, trying to get to the bottom of the red engine’s recent strange change in behaviour. "I have had a lot of things on my mind recently. I have been having a hard time with many of the drastic changes that have happened recently. I don't really understand what is wrong with me recently or what it is that I am feeling. I’m just still trying to find my footing, Edward, nothing else'. James finished with a sigh, as if he had been holding his breath. Edward decided it would be best to leave it at that for now…

There was a bit of silence again; the only thing you could hear if you listened closely was the sound of engines in the distance, the low howl of the wind, and yard workers talking to each other further down the line. Edward, in an effort to break the silence, spoke again. "What do you think of the young boy who sent you and your crew the letter?" Edward asked instead. "Hmmm… Hm! W-what?" "In your own world, James?" he teased lightly. "N-no just… Whatever, what was the question again?" James asked, turning red at being caught zoning out. "I asked what you think of the lads in your letter." James muttered a quiet ‘oh’. "I- I think they seem like the nice sort; I’m not entirely sure what to make of them though based on that one letter; I mean, it's just a letter, right? I would hardly consider this a way to make a proper friend, not like a friendship that we have, for example, at least". " Letters have helped maintain contact with people across the world for ages. It can help form all kinds of relationships, but only if you want to. Remember James, there is a person on the other end who wrote it. Much like meeting new people, you barely know anything about them; these were more like introductory letters. Over time, you can get to know each other better and form a friendship that can last a lifetime, much like old Turner and his friend in America; he goes to visit him every year now. I don't see why you can't do the same James." Edward told the red engine. "Well, I can hardly just travel to France whenever I feel like-" "You know that is not what I meant James, give it a shot; maybe you’ll be surprised." James paused. "I guess you're right," he said, slightly resigned.

James and Edward’s crew returned shortly after having finished their meal. Wallace ran up to his engine and said, "Guess who is getting a washdown today!" James smiled widely at this news. "We’ll be taking a nice picture of you to send to Andreas." Vance followed up after catching up with his energetic fireman and trying to warm up his fingers by rubbing them together and blowing on them, causing him to puff similarly to an engine. That made James let out an amused snort. Vance continued to follow Wallace, and they climbed back into their engine’s cab. Howard and Edward’s driver stood close to the station, talking to the signal man. Howard was then the first to go over to Edward. He told both engines that the obstruction had been cleared and that it was safe to proceed to their next job. Edward was to leave for Hackenbeck, and afterwards James was to head for Knapford for another goods train. The signal went down, and Edward whistled a goodbye to James, "See you in the sheds tonight James," and he slowly steamed away. James followed soon after.

The rest of the day was rather uneventful for James, who just pulled trains back and forth, to and fro, round and about across the island for the rest of the day. As evening pulled in, James returned to Tidmouth, and the crew stopped their engine on a siding to wash him down. Men were already standing with buckets of water, soap, rags, and polish. His crew also got out to help wash their engine. James usually doesn't let just anybody close to his face after all, especially in the area where he has his scar. Wallace and Vance took off their jackets and rolled up their sleeves. For a winter day, it wasn't that cold. The sun shone softly, and the frosty rails shimmered lightly. A light, warm breeze brought in nice fresh air for James and the men. Vance wet a rag and soaped it up a bit. He climbed up to his engine’s face and started cleaning. He was especially gentle around the scar, watching the engine’s face in case his expression changed or showed any kind of discomfort. When he finished, he rubbed his engine's nose affectionately, much to his annoyance. Vance then dried off his face before climbing back down. The red engine enjoyed his washdown very much, feeling like it was a much-needed massage for his sore joints.

When the crew finished cleaning and polishing James, Vance put his jacket back on as it was getting colder again, as if Wallace’s shivering and complaining were to go off of. Remembering the picture he wanted to take for the letter, he climbed back into James’s cab to grab the camera that he had stored there during one of their stops before coming here. He was able to dash home real quick, grab some more food, greet his kids, and find his camera. He climbed back down with his camera in hand. Wallace finished with the final touches before putting his stuff back on and trying to make himself look a little more presentable. Vance asked one of the workmen to take a photo of them. He explained how the camera works and quickly rushed over to James and Wallace, who was still trying to figure out a good pose. The workman directed the men into the proper position before asking the two men and James to smile. What followed was a bright flash and a whirring sound. The workman handed the camera back over to Vance, and he thanked the workman for doing him this quick favour.

Afterwards, the men slowly backed their tired engine into his spot in the sheds. It was dark now, and the skies were clear. The crescent moon and bright stars visible in the sky are the only sources of light besides the shed lights. Gordon, Henry, Edward, and Emily were also in the sheds, having finished their duties earlier than James. Edward was the only one to greet him at first, as Gordon and Henry seemed to be either having a really loud conversation or arguing about something. Emily keeps dozing off, but she did notice James. She greeted him before yawning and finally falling asleep. She had long mastered the art of cancelling everyone’s voices out when she wanted to sleep. Henry and Gordon put a halt to their conversation when they heard Emily greet him. "Oh, hello James, how was your day?" said Gordon. "About as good as yesterday… and the day before that, and the day before that," responded James. "Well, at least the weather wasn't so bad today, and you look like you just had a washdown," noted Henry with a smile. "Thank you for noticing Henry. It was still rather chilly today, and I have been told it is going to get worse. By the way, what happened up the line in Elsbridge, where Edward was headed? We were told the tracks were blocked," asked James, to which Edward responded, "Turns out Thomas came off the rails; nothing major; they were able to get him on the rails again. He’s a bit cross, but he’ll be fine".

As the engines talked about the day's events, James’s crew dropped his fire and got him ready for the night. Vance strode up to his engine, patting him on the buffer. "Looking good Jim. Have a good night." "You too Vance, get home safely," the red engine responded. "Looking good? He’s gorgeous!" Wallace yelled, running after Vance after he had turned off the shed lights; now the moon was the only source of light aside from James's face, which was practically glowing red with embarrassment.

Henry howled in laughter, and Gordon grinned mischievously. "Well well my good engine I was not aware that we were in the presence of ultimate beauty." "Oh, leave me be Gordon," grunted James. Henry howled even louder, waking Emily. "Really? Do you have to be so loud?" she yawned tiredly. "James is gorgeous, apparently," came from the end of the shed. "Wow, what did I miss?" said the Stirling single, still a little dazed. Even she chuckled a bit. Henry was still wheezing uncontrollably, and Gordon continued to mock the red engine between his own laughter. The red engine had a grimace etched onto his face from the somewhat expected relentless teasing.

The only comforting voice came from the blue engine next to him. "There is nothing to be embarrassed about; you can just ignore their teasing; you know they just want to get under your paint." "I know Edward; I just know I won't hear the end of that one for weeks. Thanks, Wallace... He really just had to say that, didn't he? You know, I often feel like he just says things without thinking." "Well, I’m sure he did not mean to embarrass you in front of the others; from my perspective, Wallace is just a very passionate, albeit somewhat all over the place, kind of man, and I’d say you and Vance are the most important faces in his life." Edward smiled when James nodded knowingly. "You know, he once told me he does not have family anymore; he didn't tell me what happened, but he said it's kind of why he always goes out of his way to be around Vance and me. It kind of makes sense though, when you think about it. He goes home every night to an empty apartment, with no one to greet him when he gets back or someone to talk to. I remember what it is like to feel alone, so I feel for him." The thought of being alone brought memories from the red engine's past to the surface. He was not very close to his siblings on his old railway, or anybody else for that matter, but he remembers the emptiness he felt when he got the news that his class was being retired. He shook in his frame, not keen to remember those times.

"Well, let's think of it this way. I think you and your crew have a very special kind of relationship. I’m close to Howard and Robert, yes, but they are more like good friends. We still try to remain professional, and I am not that knowledgeable about their past or personal lives, though they have been my footplate crew for many years. I only know that Robert has three grandchildren, a son, and a wife. Howard is married but has never had any children; he lives in a small cottage with his wife and his nephew. Now look at Gordon's crew. Charlie is always arguing with Gordon. Or Henry's crew; Francis is still rather new as a driver and has been given an engine that needs a little more finesse while handling. Emily’s driver is a rather distant and not the most talkative man, which has led to miscommunication on quite a few occasions. From my standpoint, I believe that You, Wallace and Vance, have a unique understanding of each other's strengths and weaknesses; you work well together, and you look after and respect each other. You are more at ease with those two than you ever have been with any crew before. It's something to cherish." Edward finished.

While they spoke, the snickering from the other engines gradually died down. While Henry, Emily, and Gordon had fallen asleep, Edward and James were still up. For a while, they just looked at the night sky together, enjoying the peaceful silence. It did not make him as anxious as it did in the morning. Perhaps because James was preoccupied with thinking. He thought over Edward’s words. The red engine was remembering things again. He thought about his footplate crew. The day they met, the times they fought, the times they comforted each other, the way they would laugh together... he thought about how he absolutely loved Vance and Wallace. They treated him as a unique individual and not just another engine. They treated each other like family. Those two special men treated him better than his actual so-called family ever did. Almost everyone on this railway treated him better than the people and engines on his old railway, he thought. Especially Edward… James looked over at the blue engine and thought for a moment. He thought about how the old engine said his relationship with his crew was something to cherish. It made his thoughts wander to the engine next to him.

"Edward?" "Hmm?" the old engine looked over to James. "Do you have anyone that you especially cherish? Like with any of your footplate crew in the past or any Engines?" The old engine stared out at the sky for a moment. "Hmmm… well. I really love the many people and engines on this railway. I always felt that Thomas was like a son to me. Same with Bill and Ben. I am also especially grateful for my relationship with Sir Topham Hatt and his family. And I would like to think that The engines of this island are good friends to me. But I am closest to Gordon, Henry, Percy, Toby, and of course you, James." Edward finished with a smile. James blushed a bit and averted his gaze, which was directed intensely at the blue engine.

"But I guess you already knew that. You want to hear something different, right? I believe you want to know about those who had a significant impact on my life in my younger days, perhaps?" James nodded slowly. Edward looked up again; he seemed lost in thought. "I was once very close to a man named Johnny Bay. He was a fireman back when I was still working on the Furness Railway. I had multiple different crews depending on shifts, but John was special because he always had some snacks for the engines he was assigned to. He was closer to the engines than he was to other people. He also gave us nicknames."

"What did he call you?" smirked James. Edward laughed. "He called me Toffee." James went wide-eyed and tried to contain his laughter. "It's alright; it was meant to be funny. I used to love Toffee, and he especially got Toffee for me. There was an engine I worked with that he nicknamed Scone; another he called Pudding; another was called Tart… See a pattern? My favourite was our old shunter that he nicknamed Whisky, though that nickname was a little more problematic as a tipsy locomotive was a bit counterproductive. So John only gave him candies with small amounts of whisky. But John always loved to spend time with us; he loved to sing us drinking songs, tell us tall tales, play the occasional prank on other footplate crews, etc. He was quite agile for an old man. Every engine loved that man, and he was never unhappy, even when everyone else had no reason to be happy. He absolutely adored us engines the most. I remember a time when we were in our sheds during a particularly nasty storm. He came in completely soaked with a basket. We had a picnic of sorts. He spread a blanket on the shed floor for himself and spread some food around. He had many exotic things for us to try. Whisky apparently had a severe dislike of mangoes." Edward laughed at the memory before his smile fell. He sighed before he continued.

"I had a younger brother. Everyone called him Jr. He was named after one of our predecessors, a K1 Seagull named George. He followed me around like a lost puppy. It used to annoy me, but now I look back on those times with great fondness. He was the kindest engine in our yard, helpful, eager, smart… He was truly the best of us; he still had our typical shy steaming troubles, but he rarely ever let them show, which often led to him overworking himself, and he would also take any job given to him without complaints."

"He sounds a lot like you," smiled James. "Well, I do try to be as hardworking as he was when he was alive. I admit that when I was young, I was cocky, arrogant, and very impatient... I felt that what prompted me to change was when I had already been on Sodor and was told Jr. was in an accident and was being sent away for scrap. That really stirred something within me. I remember thinking, ‘Why him?’ He was a hard worker; why him and not me?" James looked down, and Edward sighed. He had a tired smile, and his eyes showed his age.

"Do you still feel bad?" the red engine asked carefully. "No, not that much anymore." James raised a brow in question at the response. Edward chuckled at his expression before looking back up at the starry sky. "I got to see him before they took him away, thanks to Sir Topham Hatt letting me take a train to Barrow in Furness so I could go see him before the scrap train left. He wasn't upset that he was being scrapped. He told me the only thing he regretted was not being able to spend more time with his favourite big brother." The old engine choked out the last part. He took a deep breath in an attempt to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. James grew concerned; he was unsure of what he should do, but he felt he should not say anything and interrupt his train of thought. If Edward didn't want to continue, he was sure he would say so.

"You can imagine how hard I cried," Edward said with a half-hearted smile. "I’m not even ashamed to admit it... He told me he had already come to terms with being scrapped, and he spent most of the time trying to console me. I remember constantly apologising to him for the times I mistreated or ignored him, and he just laughed it off like it was nothing; he wasn't the type to hold grudges, I guess. But before he left, he did make me promise him one thing, one thing as his last wish." "And what's that?" asked James cautiously. "He made me promise him to live a long, happy working life, find new friends, and find a new family... I promised... Then the train took him away."

The sheds were silent. Edward sighed in relief, his tense expression easing from his face. "I’m sorry, Edward." James spoke quietly; the heartbreaking story had made him emotional as well. For a while, the only thing that could be heard between the two engines was a soft, cool breeze through the yards. "Don't be! We have known each other for years now, and I do consider you to be my family. Understand that that is why I worry about you and occasionally tease you or am strict with you. I enjoy your company, and I enjoy working with you. To me, it was no big deal to tell you a personal story, especially since you asked and I trust you, so I was more than happy to share with you." He had no words for Edward's admission. To James, what he had just said was a really big deal, but he couldn't come up with anything to say. He awkwardly cleared his throat and contemplated for a bit. "I, um… I appreciate the sentiment." Edward’s expression fell a bit at that, like that was not what he was hoping for, but was quickly replaced with a smile again.

"Well, James, would you want to share anything about your past crew or your siblings?" asked the old blue engine. "Oh, well..." James tried to recall. "I was kind of an oddball amongst my siblings, and they treated me as such, either downright insulting me or ignoring me. I have had many crew members who liked me, but they were always more like colleagues than friends. Lawrence I had the pleasure of calling a friend. The war did make it so we had to trust each other, and it made me upset when I saw what it did to him. Then came Vance and Wallace. I remember at first I couldn't stand Vance; he would just bark orders and didn't consider my wishes… When it came to goods trains… Anyway, Wallace at the time was new to the yards over here, and I just remember thinking of him as a bit of a scatterbrain. He didn't annoy me as much as he did Vance… We really gave Vance a hard time, now that I'm remembering… but one night we got stuck in a siding as the switches broke and were stuck against me. Instead of just finding a place to stay, Wallace decided to stay. Vance went to find a place but then came back because he either couldn't find a place or because he felt bad. I think he felt bad because he wasn't gone for long. We just talked… all night. Vance told us about his family: his wife and kids, his parents, his siblings, yknow. Wallace told us about his travels and his difficult upbringing. He was always much more open, probably because he didn't have much to lose. I told them about the Lancaster and Yorkshire Railway, about my time on Sodor, my crash, my paintwork, and so on. We talked well into the morning when workmen came to fix the points. After that day, we had a sort of understanding, and over time, that developed into a bond, I guess... Beyond what Lawrence and I had."

Edward smiled. "Thank you for sharing with me." O- oh sure, you know, we should maybe… talk… like this more often?" The red engine stuttered, looking away. "I’d like that," said Edward with a smile. "And thank you, Edward, for sharing. I’m actually grateful," said the red engine. "Of course James, anytime. I thank you for listening. I appreciate it. Anyway, we should get some sleep. We’ll be up early again." "Yes, you're right… Goodnight Edward" "Goodnight Gorgeous." Edward snickered, backing into his sport in the shed, leaving James a spluttering mess. James just grunted in the end and backed into the shed as well. Before falling asleep, he just watched the stars for a little while longer, sighing deeply before slowly drifting off to sleep.

[ironverseocs]

Who is your current muse, and who is their faceclaim/what do they look like? What is one item that you associate without fail to them? What is their favourite colour? Is there a song you associate with them? If not, what quote fits the best for them? What do they like doing in their spare time? How much spare time do they get? What one fact do you love about them, but might not have had the chance to share yet?

My current muse is Andrea "Andy" Pereira, an OC from the Parks & Rec fandom who is in a queerplatonic relationship with another one of my creations Stephen Sebastian Knope-Wyatt. (I know technically he's canonised as of the farewell season, but due to my interpretations and heavy cultivation of a personality and life-story for him, I consider him oc-status. If you will... a #Schrödinger'sOC, as I've come to dub these types of characters.)

Andy doesn't have a face claim currently, but she does have a pinterest board which includes a general visage close to the one I hold in my head. In terms of visuals, the closet I have come to finding an fc is Sophia Black-D'elia (image at bottom), but I'm not completely sold on her. For now, Andrea remains officially face-claim-less.

—

Several items make me think of her, such as big hiking backpacks or converse shoes paired with flannel, but I think the most 'Andy' object would be those white, tin mugs you take on camping trips for your morning coffee. Her favourite thing? Opening up the back of her offroading vehicle and screwing on the gas canister for her little JetBoil stove to make coffee at 5:30 am just so she can watch the sun rise with a hot drink in her hand. She started doing this long before she met Stephen, long before she even left South America.

—

Andy's favourite colour is the kind of orange you only see in a mountain sunset, somewhere where the air is so clear you cannot smell the industrialisation anymore. Somewhere where the water runs crystalline blue and the birds cross the sky without a flap in their wings, the smoothest soar. A place where no one knows; a sunset no one else will ever see. An orange so vibrant, it's fire without the burn. An orange she would never have seen in the smoggy, polluted city she grew up in.

—

Two songs I associate with Andy:

Some Italian Mountain - Sophie May

And I hate to admit it But I can't wait till October when I'm allowed to escape him And move my life to some Italian mountain Mmm mmm mmm mmm

Traffic in the Sky - Jack Johnson

It's enough to make me cry But that don't seem like it would make it feel better The answers could be found, we could learn from diggin' down But no one ever seems to be diggin'

—

In her spare time, she loves kicking back with a good book. While a solid majority of the time, you can find her pushing the boundary of human-recognised lands, she isn't above every now and again recollecting herself with a sit in and a good book, especially if she and Stephen find a good place to park their van on some West Coast desert land. Oh, with the sun shining down just right... after whipping out the camp stove to make a little noontime meal... She'll set up her canvas chair, take out her current read, and while away the rest of the daylight hours getting lost in the words.

—

Due to the nature of her living situation right now (aka: she lives a nomadic life in a van), she has a lot more spare time than most people do these days. That being said, she still has a job to ensure that she can afford this lifestyle. She (very strictly, might I add) makes sure her work doesn't go past 5pm, as she is very conscience of the line between "work" and "rest", guarding her free time with her life. Andy believes there is more to life than work. She believes, first and foremost, in experiences and living.

—

Not particularly a fact I love about them (although it's not like I hate the fact lolol) but a fact I'm proud of creating for her is about her origin town as it weaves its way into who her character is currently. She was raised on the cusp of poverty in a city where the streets were dingy and the air a polluted, breathing hazard. Growing up, she hated it and would often spend her afternoons picking up trash along the sidewalks of her neighbourhood. As soon as she was able to, Andy left home for wider, cleaner pastures (so to speak). She saved up money in a piggybank all her teen years to backpack in the Andes, which wasn't enough by far but that didn't stop her; with an old rucksack, a sleeping bag given to her by one of the climbers she met passing through her town one day, and plastic baggies of food and safety equipment and toiletries, she set off. The people she met along the trail, some of them became her friends, and one of them... became her best friend: Stephen Sebastian Knope-Wyatt. That was the first time he helped her out of a jam (after all, she was ill-prepared for backpacking despite her best efforts), and since, they've been helping each other since.

-

*Closest FC I've found for her: Sophia Black-D'elia

Forever tag: @arrthurpendragon @foxesandmagic @shrinkthisviolet @ochub @ocappreciation | if you'd like to be added, send me a dm or ask ✨💓✨

[beautifulhigh]

Hi anon about Owen and Carlos here! I totally agree with what you said. I was just wondering about it from Carlos’s pov. Considering how long it took for Carlos to even get comfortable calling Owen by his name and even this season he didn't want to tell him to back off over the wedding planning, I was just thinking about how he would approach his relationship with Owen as his father-in-law. I definitely think Owen wants to be there for both Carlos and Andrea (I think the scenes with Tommy after the funeral and him walking Andrea to her seat at the wedding are indicative of that) but we all know Carlos haad such a complicated relationship with his own father and Gabriel died before they could really repair their relationship. I'm just wondering how all of this will influence Carlos’s approach with Owen since Carlos has always seemed to view Owen in that traditional way where he always just wants Owen to know how safe his son is with him even as he has gotten a lot more comfortable with him

I wanted to sit on this until I could answer it properly - and think on it some more.

And weirdly enough, I didn't change my mind all that much about Carlos' relationship with his father-in-law.

The Carlos we saw at the end of S4, taking his husband's hand while they lazed on their honeymoon, is so not the same man who introduced himself to Captain Strand in the middle of a rain storm. Yes, it took him a while to get comfortable with calling him Owen instead of sir or by his title, but he's there now. We saw it over and over in S4: calling him Owen when he dropped over with Chinese, when Owen called with the gene test results. He's there - this man is Owen to him now.

Not wanting to tell him to back off in wedding planning is a VERY different scenario to "I'm hurting and I need a father figure in my life". At that point the biggest drama in their relationship was "is he going to make us have the gluten free cake at the wedding" - once you've upgraded to "he stopped me straight up murdering a man" there's a definite shift. Plus they are WILDLY different scenarios. When you don't want to rock the boat, you're careful with what you say and do. When the boat is sinking then you don't care as much.

Up to this point, Carlos' relationship with Owen has been centered around TK. They get on, they care about each other, Owen has very much approved of the relationship - and they have used that common bond before. We saw them start to move their relationship beyond TK in 2x08: it was their shared concern for TK that started their hunt across the city for the missing paramedic crew, but Owen offered Carlos a lot of support and encouragement for him outside of it. He followed Carlos' lead with the van, joining the dots from the chip to the restaurant, to what he wanted to do after calling it in.

Owen's comment about Carlos being an impressive guy may have been to Gabriel but there's no way that the sentiment didn't carry over into Owen's actions and behaviours afterwards. There's no way that Carlos, our observant over-thinking Carlos, didn't work out that Owen likes Carlos for who he is, not just because he loves TK. Owen's speech to TK about him marrying someone good and kind and dependable who will take good care of him... Owen knows all this about Carlos and he will love his son-in-law for that, and then love him for who he is.

Carlos loving and caring for TK earned him points in Owen's book - Carlos then added a whole bunch of them all by himself.

I think Owen is definitely going to make an effort to show up for Carlos in the same way we have seen him show up for TK - and while it might take a moment for Carlos to get used to that, I know that he will. He got used to calling him Owen - boy is adaptable.

But I think, more than all of that, is that Carlos has this gap in his life now and it's instinctive to want to find something to fill it. I am going to bet a bingo square for S5 that he start off trying to fill it with the hunt for his father's killer but, over time, that will change. Whether he gets the closure he wants or not he's going to learn that you can't fill a gap in your heart with anger and a drive for revenge, not without it doing something irreparable to you as a person.

Carlos said as much to TK before he proposed - TK going to Owen saved him. TK saved Carlos because if Carlos had killed that man, regardless of his guilt, then he wouldn't be the Carlos we know and love. He would be someone else and that would be an adjustment everyone would need to make.

(Side note: I'm interested to see the change in Owen in S5 for this very reason. Because motives and circumstance aside, he killed his brother. He is not going to be the same person after that.)

How (pro)active Carlos is in developing that relationship? That depends on how he deals with his grief and how he channels it. But I think Owen will just show up for Carlos anyway, because that's what a parent does for a child. You're there for them whether they want you there or not. You don't push it unless you have to, you just set up camp within reach and let them know you're there, no matter what.

[paradoxinabottle]

I thought up a short story that i'm going to use for a custom GTA san andreas mission, so i decided to share it here!

PARKING LOT GUY

Scene 1:

Once upon a time, at parking lot in San fierro.

Mr. Incompetente: "Alright, Mr. Voiture, this is the first day for both of us.

I'll be starting our new business, and you'll work the parking lot."

Guy Voiture: "It's an honor, man, but are you sure you can do business stuff?

I mean...

Being woken up by you at 3 in the morning...

and doing your taxes on the shitter...

while having the worst stomachache of my life...

is not exactly an experience i'd like to repeat."

Incompetente: "Oh, no no no. Don't worry about that at all.

I've studied business management, you see.

After we become rich, you'll look back on those hard days with pride."

Guy: "Well I only feel constipated about it now, so please be successful."

Incompetente: "I will, my dear friend, I will..."

Incompetente leaves to do his business.

Guy: "Alright, time to park some fucking cars, baby."

Scene 2:

A car approaches the parking lot. The man inside the car calls to the garagekeeper.

Man: "Hey, could you park my car at the top floor, please?"

Guy: "Your car likes a nice view, eh? Sure."

*OBJECTIVE: Park the car on the top floor of the parking lot.*

Guy parks the car on the top floor.

Guy: "Alright, job well done."

Guy walks away from the car and suddenly hears the *voooooo* noise coming from the sky.

Guy looks straight up and sees an object he can't identify.

Guy: "what the fuck is that?"

Suddenly the parked car starts getting pulled into the air towards the object.

Guy: "WHAT the FUCK?"

The car is gone, the object flies away. Guy realizes at that moment it was a UFO.

Guy: "Well, the authorities aren't exactly gonna accept 'Fuckin aliens' as testimony.

I gotta find a replacement. like, right now."

*OBJECTIVE: Go find a car of the same model and color.*

Guy finds a car identical the one he parked.

Guy: "Can't let those alien shitheads ruin my job."

The car's owner returns. Guy takes the car out and gives him the keys.

Man: "Thanks for the service mate, I'll be telling my friends about this lot!"

The man drives away.

Guy: "...I wonder if he'll ever realize that this is not his car."

Scene 3:

A hippie looking minivan approaches the parking lot. a drug junkie stumbles out of the automobile.

Junkie: "hey maaan... keep my car in... equilibriummmmm..."

Guy: "Lay off the drugs man, I'll park your car, you go sober up."

the junkie says "daaaamn... i love nice people.. woahhh..." and walks away.

Guy gets in the car and says "What the fuck is that smell? is that... weed?"

Guy becomes immediately stoned.

Guy: "what the.. fuuuuuuuck??? i see stars and shit... waaaaaa?"

Guy starts seeing strange things inside the parking lot. he's having an acid trip.

He does his best to get the car to the parking spot, avoiding the hallucinations in his way.

Guy gets out of the minivan. he falls on the ground and becomes completely sober again.

Guy: "Holy shit man... I'm never touching that shit ever again."

Guy goes back to his post, the junkie comes back.

Guy: "Oh god, i have to get the car out again..."

Junkie: "hey man... could you bring my van?"

Guy: "wha? oh. uh. sorry i suddenly have really bad diarrhea, please get it out yourself!"

Guy hands the junkie the key to the minivan and tries to pretend like he can't hold it in anymore.

Junkie: "Hey man wait!"

Guy stops for a moment.

Junkie: "...I don't know how to drive."

Guy: "..."

Junkie: "..."

Guy: "......."

Junkie: "......."

Guy: "...Are you fucking serious?"

Junkie: "...just bring the car out of the car place, man. please."

Guy: "...god give me patience. and laxatives too."

Guy gets in the minivan and goes through the same stoned ordeal.

When he gets out of the garage, he exits the minivan, barely on his feet.

Junkie: "thanks man, you're a reaaally nice guy"

Guy, half stoned: "reaaally nice guy? no, man, i'm just guyyy... guy voitureee.."

Guy regains his soberness and asks the junkie "How are you gonna drive now? you just said you couldn't drive."

Junkie: "Who cares mannnn? it's not your responsibility anymore. see yaaa, nice guy vuatoooor.."

The junkie drives away and immediately hits another car. He drives away and the police chase after him.

Guy: "Well, it's not my responsibility anymore."

Scene 4:

Guy sees something he's never seen in person before. It's an actual tank!

the tank stops at the garage, a soldier comes out.

Soldier: "Hey, park this on the first floor please."

Guy: "...HUH?! and why are you so sure i can drive a tank?"

Soldier: "Hey man, it's easy, it's no different from a normal car."

Guy: "If you don't mind me asking, why are you parking your tank here?"

Soldier: "we're preparing an ambush, a russian jet is going to come by here, and we need to shoot it down."

Guy: "...I'm gonna have to get fucking used to this, aren't I?"

Guy gets in the tank and drives it to the specified spot.

Soldier: "Thanks man. Is there a bathroom around here?"

Guy: "Yeah, It's over there."

The soldier goes to the bathroom. Guy goes back to his post.

Guy hears a very strong jet engine sound in the distance. he looks up.

Guy: "...What the fuck?"

A hydra jet plane stops above the parking lot, it lands in front of the entrance.

A russian looking soldier steps out. "Greetings comrade!"

Guy is flabbergasted.

Russian: "I need your help, I'm trying to hide from some american soldiers.

Could you park my jet in the 2nd floor? so it can be hidden from above."

Guy: "I work a parking lot, comrade... i don't know to pilot a jet."

Russian: "Oh! don't worry at all, it's just like driving a normal car."

Guy: "...hopefully i don't need to vomit, the bathroom is occupied."

Guy gets in the plane and shoves it inbetween the floors.

Russian: "Thank you comrade! If you don't mind me asking, is there a bathroom around here?"

Guy: "Yeah, it's on the first floor."

The russian soldier goes to the bathroom.

Guy realizes what he's done and audibly goes "Oh... shit."

He watches over the bathroom in worry of what might happen.

suddenly, he hears the american soldier gasp, and the russian soldier swears in russian.

they get into a huge fist fight and take it outside.

Guy: "...I don't think the phrase 'Shit happens' can explain this situation..."

Scene 5:

Mr incompetente gets back from work and approaches Guy.

Incompetente: "So, how was your first day at work, mr. Voiture?"

Guy: "You owe me explanations, salary, and laxatives."

Incompetente: "Ah, you're right. However, I'm kinda short on budget right now."

Guy: "Short on budget? Haven't you been running the business? we're supposed to be rich now!"

Incompetente: "I'm afraid we've gone bankrupt."

Guy: "..."

Incompetente: "It is rather unfortunate."

Guy: "......."

Incompetente: "we'll need to make amends, for we are in a bit of a pickle."

guy: "..........."

Incompetente: "Is something the matter?"

Guy: "It's been 30 minutes, Bill."

Incompetente: "...Why are you calling me by my first name now?"

Guy: "THIRTY FUCKING MINUTES! you should take this time to guiness, because you'd get the world record for fastest and most effective bankruptcy ever.

In this god forsaken half-hour, i had to deal with drug junkies, intercontinental warfare, and ALIENS!

And you were just taking a shit for 30 minutes and suddenly decided 'Hmm, we are not doing well financially.'

I know your name is french for incompetent, but i didn't think it was THIS accurate!"

Incompetente: "I couldn't help it, mr voiture, I had terrible diarrhea."

Guy: "So you WERE taking a shit?!"

Incompetente: "That does not matter anymore, i have more plans for business"

Guy: "You actually fucking do?!"

Incompetente: "A restaurant business. Very high class."

Guy: "...Actually, what even WAS the business you were doing a few minutes ago?"

incompetente: "it's the 'Business' business"

Guy: "..."

Incompetente: "..."

Guy: "...Plumbing?"

Incompetente: "Correct."

Guy: "so you were managing a plumbing company?"

Incompetente: "No, I was taking a more... 'Hands-on' appraoch"

Guy: "You were being a PLUMBER? in this fancy-ass fucking suit?!"

Incompetente: "Watch your language, mr voiture."

Guy: "And were you taking a shit during the job?"

Incompetente: "It's not like i can control that, mr voiture."

Guy: "Hold the fuck on, why did i even need to manage this parking lot?"

Incompetente: "Stop asking unnecessary questions, mr voiture."

Guy: "...I'm retiring, i can't take this anymore"

Incompetente: "Wait, hold on, Guy!"

Guy: "...What?"

Incompetente: "I can't do this without you, my friend, I have to admit that you're more reliable that I am."

Guy: "...."

Incompetente: "I'm sure we'll do better next time. We just have to cooperate."

Guy: "...Bill?"

Incompetente: "We're childhood friends, right?"

Guy: "...Right, and I'll do my best to help you too."

Incompetente: "really?"

Guy: "On one condition."

Incompetente: "What is it?"

....

....

....

"Keep a seperate budget for laxatives."

THE END

[forensicated]

Smiffina Episodes - Episode 268

We start where the last episode left off - but suddenly now there's lots of people around for Smithy to yell at to get back in the flats and out the line of fire whilst he checks both Kirkby and Gabriel.

Spotting the sniper running from the roof, Smithy takes the chance to run towards the building to try catch him, running up the fire escape. Unfortunately he doesn't get chance to as by the time he gets there the sniper has potentially disappeared inside the building and baricaded the only way Smithy could get inside from the roof.

Gabriel is now back on his feet, wanting to get to Smithy to 'help' him search but Adam appears and orders him to the hospital before he can. At the station, Andrea rings Bruce to tell him about the shooting, interupted by Jack and Neil appearing before she can continue. Kirkby has been shot in the lower back and is critical. If he survives, he may never walk again.

Rowan and Adam join Smithy on the roof and discuss the shot and the sniper. Smithy finds a boot print near the door that leads to inside the building. "... It ain't mine."

Gabriel tries to discharge himself but Jack refuses to let him,. telling him he could have been the target and he has to stay overnight - with an armed officer as guard.

Andrea asks Smithy if he's cross with her because he told Gabriel about him being the one to report the accusation to MIT. Smithy says he's bigger things to worry about - like the sniper, and feeling guilty for 'letting' the sniper get away.

Gabriel speaks to Kirkby before he left, reassured he saw nothing. Morell arrives just in time and asks why Gabriel shouted for them to get down before the shot. Gabriel plays dumb, he doesn't know why he did it... perhaps something caught his eye, perhaps it was birds flying. He refuses to answer. Morell tells him that he's likely the intended target given Kerry's murder. He gives his armed officer the slip and leaves the hospital.

Uniform are having to wear body armour and go around with SO/CO19 officers. CID aren't - it's because it appears they're targeting uniform... but given Kerry wasn't wearing her uniform at the time, surely CID should be supported too if they're working on the idea that it's the police who are the targets?

Sheelagh and Leela are directed by neighbours to a man who they say 'is as shady as you like, involved in all sorts on the estate and has a gun'. They go to speak to him... with Sheelagh initially more interested at accusing Leela of stabbing her (Sheelagh's) friend at Barton St in the back than speaking to the suspect. For a woman who used to be Sgt until a few weeks ago, Sheelagh is laughably clueless at people management.

The man tells Sheelagh and Leela that they dislike him and call him a nonce and put faeces through his letter box. He admits he uses a water pistol to scare children off but doesn't have a gun.

Gabriel charges round to the 'friend' who has been working in allegience with him, furious that he dare do a job off his own back without Gabriel setting it up in advance. "You only shoot the people I tell you to!" The sniper admits he had to leave his van behind because Smithy run after him and 'messed everything up'. He's leaving because if they find the van and look into it, it's a link back to him. He tells Gabriel he shot Kirkby because Gabriel was arresting him and he so he thought he was scum. Gabriel asks why he started branching out alone and the sniper tells him he wanted to teach Gabriel a lesson. He tells him he messed up when he shot Kerry using his gun and his bullets and it would be him with his head in the noose if they found him. He's fed up of Gabriel calling the shots and wants to be the one making the decisions. He knows the truth about Gabriel being David Kent and pretending to be his brother - he's dangerous... not least when he holds Gabriel at gunpoint. Gabriel uses manipulation to talk him round and tells him that he'll go to the station and find out what they know - and make sure it doesn't come back on the sniper.

Gabriel meets Rowan at the scene of the sniper assault and questions her about the van that they're looking at. He asks if there's any leads. Rowan makes it back to the station before Gabriel and tells Smithy about her meeting with him. Both are suspicious about what Gabriel is up to. Gabriel returns to the sniper and tells him they've got a witness, a bootprint and are looking into the van after finding where he shot from. The sniper tells him to sort it out - if he goes down he'll take Gabriel down with him.

Smithy questions Gabriel once he finally arrives, on why he's hours later than he said he'd be. He questions if he's suffering delayed shock and tries to send him home. He tells him he knows what it's like to be shot at and that it shakes you up. Gabriel spaces out for a moment and mentions Kerry's death - Smithy questions it and Gabriel quickly covers saying he meant Kirkby and got confused. Smithy's even more suspicious, trying to work through what it means.

Gabriel thinks he's covered his back for the mean time, though that theory is blown out of the water when he walks into a room to find Suzie and Ken watching CCTV footage of the sniper hiring a van - right as the sniper turns to give a full view of his face on the screen.

[theyhaveacavetroll]

Saundreas + Riventrix. Beatrix formally introduces her dad to her boyfriend, but her dad pays no attention to him, just sulks about Saul because it’s the anniversary of when Saul “killed” him

"Your dad. Is Andreas of Eraklyon. Your dad is fucking ANDREAS OF ERAKLYON!"

Beatrix shakes her head. This is not going to go well, she can tell. Unless -

"If you shut up and come with me right now, you can meet him and he won't really even notice," she says, and Riven gapes.

"Meet him?" he asks incredulously, and Beatrix rolls her eyes.

"Yes, meet him, like a proper boyfriend so he won't find out we're fucking from someone else and assume I'm hiding you for some reason," she answers. "Come on."

Saul has aged into a very, very handsome man and it's not fair. It's not fair, it's not right, and Andreas would very, very much like to punch something.

"I think the timing on that worked out very well, don't you?" Rosalind asks, and Andreas spares a moment from his contemplation of the retreating prison van to look at her.

"It's taken sixteen years," he reminds, and Rosalind smiles.

"Yes - sixteen years to the day. Poetic, if I say so myself. You look well."

"I look fat and old," Andreas responds. "You left us too little space to move around in."

Rosalind smiles.

"You've all the space in the world now," she answers. "I'll expect you in my office first thing tomorrow."

She walks away, and Andreas sighs.

Saul has gotten handsome, and Andreas has gotten old, and today marks the anniversary of the worst day of his life. He'd like to get drunk. He'd like to go for a run, or a walk, or a drive, or do anything, really, to mark the end of his exile. He wonders if he even remembers how to drive anymore.

"Dad, I'd like you to meet my boyfriend."

Beatrix's voice sounds from behind him, and Andreas turns.

"Little Storm," he greets, and bends down to kiss his daughter on the cheek. She beams up at him, and he smiles. "You did very well. Are you alright?"

"I did it," she answers. "I got revenge, just like I swore. Can I have a pony?"

One day, Andreas thinks, he's going to have to do exactly what his daughter keeps pestering him about. That day might even be today.

The scar on his chest twinges, and he winces. Damn thing would act up right now, he thinks, and rubs at it.

"Not today, Little Storm," he answers, and Beatrix pouts. "Since you've acquired a shadow, though -"

He gestures to the baggage being unloaded from the car.

"I'll drop these off in the headmaster's suite, shall I?" the young man asks, and Andreas nods.

"Yes. I'm going for a walk."

Maybe, he thinks, he can walk off the bit of him that wants to howl in pain - or at least he can find something to dull it a bit.

"See?" Beatrix asks after he's gone, and Riven shakes his head.

"Gotta be honest - not really what I was picturing," he admits, and Beatrix frowns.

"Don't be rude," she scolds. "And don't drop that one." She points at one of the suitcases, and Riven gives her a shallow bow.

"As my lady wishes," he answers.