#and... even after all that time I still can't figure it out

[jupiterpilgrim]

The Sweet Girls' Dilemma: Three is the Answer!!

Christmas Special🎄

Ningning x Rei x Male Reader

word count: 14K

"What the actual fuck?" you mutter, standing frozen in your doorway. The scene before you feels surreal - your two ex-girlfriends, Ningning and Rei, are lounging on your couch like they own the place. They're both dressed festively - Ning in a short red dress that shows off her petite frame, Rei in a green sweater dress that hugs her soft curves.

"Surprise!" Ning chirps, jumping up with that familiar bouncy energy that always made your heart skip. "Merry Christmas Eve!"

"How did you... what are you..." you stammer, still trying to process this bizarre situation. After a long day, you'd been looking forward to a quiet evening alone, since work had made it impossible to make it to your family's house in time. This was the last thing you expected.

Rei gives you that shy smile that never fails to make you melt. "We kind of broke in. Well, not really broke in..."

"I may have kept a copy of the spare key," Ning admits with a mischievous grin. "Don't be mad!"

You run a hand through your hair, overwhelmed. "I'm not mad, just... confused as hell. What's going on here?"

The two girls exchange meaningful looks. Rei fidgets with the hem of her dress. "We've been talking..."

"About you," Ning adds, stepping closer. "About us. All of us."

"Look, we know the history is messy," Rei says, also standing up. Her thick thighs peek out from under the sweater dress as she moves. "The way things ended with both of us..."

"But we figured out the problem!" Ning bounces on her toes excitedly. "We were trying to force you to choose!"

You lean against the wall, head spinning. "What exactly are you suggesting here?"

"We want to try again, daddy" Rei says softly. "Both of us. Together."

"You don't have to pick between us anymore," Ning adds. "We can all be together!"

"Have you both lost your minds?" you ask, but your eyes keep trailing over their bodies. Fuck, they both look incredible tonight. Ning's dress shows off her delicate collarbones, slim waist, those perky little tits that fit perfectly in your hands. And Rei... that sweater dress is doing criminal things to her curves, highlighting her thick thighs and soft stomach that you used to love grabbing.

"Maybe a little," Rei giggles. "But think about it - it makes sense! You loved both of us..."

"Still do," you admit without thinking. Heat rises to your face.

"Exactly!" Ning claps her hands. "And we complement each other perfectly. Rei's the sweet nurturing one, I'm the fun adventurous one..."

"Plus we're already friends," Rei adds. "We talked it all through. We both want this."

Your mind is racing. They're right - you never truly got over either of them. Things ended with Ning because you felt guilty about your growing feelings for Rei. Then things fell apart with Rei because you couldn't stop thinking about Ning. But both of them? Together? The idea sends blood rushing south.

"This is crazy," you mutter, but you can't tear your eyes away from them.

"Crazy good," Ning purrs, pressing against your side. Her small hand trails down your chest. "We missed you so much..."

Rei steps closer on your other side, her soft curves brushing your arm. "Let us show you how much..."

"Fuck," you breathe as Ning's fingers play with your shirt buttons. "Are you sure about this?"

They answer by kissing you - Ning fierce and demanding, Rei sweet and gentle. Your head spins as they take turns claiming your mouth, their different styles driving you wild. Ning nips at your lower lip while Rei soothes it with her tongue.

"Bedroom?" Ning suggests breathlessly.

You nod, unable to form words as they lead you down the hall. Your cock is already straining against your pants just from their kisses.

In the bedroom, they push you to sit on the edge of the bed. Ning straddles one of your thighs while Rei kneels between your legs. The contrast between them is intoxicating - Ning's lithe body in that tight red dress, Rei's lush curves in soft green.

"We've been planning this," Ning whispers in your ear. "Talking about all the things we want to do to you..."

"And with each other," Rei adds with a blush that makes your cock twitch.

You groan as they work together to undress you - Ning unbuttoning your shirt while Rei unfastens your pants. Their hands roam over your exposed skin, relearning your body.

"Fuck, I missed your muscles," Ning purrs, trailing her nails down your chest.

"Still so strong," Rei agrees, squeezing your thighs.

When they've stripped you down to your boxers, they step back to give you a show. Ning unzips her dress slowly, letting it pool at her feet. She's wearing tiny red lace panties and nothing else, her small perky tits on full display.

Rei is more shy, needing encouragement from Ning to pull her sweater over her head. But fuck, the wait is worth it. Her curvy body is wrapped in green lingerie - a lacy bralette struggling to contain her full breasts, matching panties hugging her thick thighs.

"Beautiful," you breathe, drinking in the sight of them. "Both of you are so fucking beautiful."

They beam at the praise, moving closer again. Ning climbs fully into your lap while Rei kneels between your spread legs. Your hands automatically go to Ning's slim waist as she grinds against your erection.

"Want to see something hot?" Ning asks with a wicked grin. At your nod, she turns to Rei. "Come here, baby."

Your cock throbs as your ex-girlfriends kiss each other, soft and sweet at first but quickly growing heated. Ning tangles her fingers in Rei's hair while Rei's hands squeeze Ning's small ass. The sight of them together is better than any porn you've ever watched.

"Holy fuck," you groan. Your hips buck up involuntarily, making Ning gasp into Rei's mouth.

They break apart, lips shiny and pupils blown wide. "Like that?" Ning teases. "We've been practicing..."

"So hot," you manage. Your boxers are tented obscenely now.

Rei's hands slide up your thighs. "Can I...?"

"Please," you breathe. Ning gets off your lap, you lift your hips so she can pull your boxers down, freeing your aching cock.

"Mmm, I missed this cock," Ning purrs, wrapping her small hand around your shaft. "Remember how good he fills us up, Rei?"

Rei nods, licking her lips. "So big..."

They work together, stroking your length with their different techniques. Ning's grip is firm and quick while Rei's touch is softer, teasing. The combination has you throbbing in their hands.

"Fuck, that feels amazing," you groan as they take turns kissing and licking your cock. Ning focuses on the head while Rei works the shaft, their tongues occasionally meeting in the middle.

"Want to see him fuck my throat?" Ning asks Rei with a wicked grin. "He used to make me gag so pretty..."

Rei nods eagerly, watching as Ning wraps her lips around your cock

"Okay, time to show you how much I've missed this big fucking cock," Ning purrs, wrapping her lips around your throbbing head. Her tongue swirls expertly as she takes you deeper, inch by inch, maintaining eye contact the whole time. You groan as she relaxes her throat, taking your full length until her nose presses against your pelvis.

"Holy fuck, that's hot," Rei breathes, watching intently as Ning starts bobbing her head. Drool drips down your shaft as she fucks her own throat on your cock, making obscene wet gagging sounds.

"Show Rei how you used to take it," you growl, gripping Ning's hair. She moans around your length as you start thrusting up into her willing throat. Her eyes water but she doesn't pull back, letting you use her mouth roughly.

After a particularly deep thrust, Ning pulls off with a gasp. "Your turn baby," she tells Rei breathlessly. "Show him that sweet mouth of yours."

Rei leans in eagerly, wrapping her plump lips around your spit-slicked cock. Where Ning was rough and fast, Rei starts slow and sensual, taking you deeper with each bob of her head. Her soft moans vibrate around your shaft.

"That's it," Ning encourages, running her fingers through Rei's hair. "Take that big cock nice and deep. He loves it when you gag on it."

You grip the sheets as Rei picks up speed, her head bobbing faster as she takes you to the back of her throat. She gags slightly but doesn't stop, determined to take your full length like Ning did.

"Fuck yes, choke on that cock," Ning purrs. She guides Rei's head down further until tears form in her eyes. "Doesn't she look pretty gagging on it?"

"So fucking pretty," you groan. Both girls work together now, taking turns sucking and stroking your throbbing length. Ning deep throats you aggressively while Rei focuses on teasing the head with her tongue.

"My turn again," Ning demands after a few minutes. She grabs your cock and guides it back to her mouth, immediately taking you to the base. Her throat contracts around you as she gags, but she just takes you deeper.

"Show off," Rei giggles, but her eyes are dark with lust as she watches Ning's performance. She leans in to lick and suck your balls while Ning continues deep throating you.

The dual sensation has your hips bucking up involuntarily. Ning adjusts her angle to take it, letting you fuck her throat roughly while Rei's tongue works your sack.

"Fuck, your mouth feels amazing," you groan, fisting Ning's hair as she gags around your length. Drool runs down her chin and neck, making a mess of her chest.

When she finally comes up for air, her lipstick is smeared and her eyes are watering. "Miss getting my throat fucked like that," she pants. "Your turn again Rei. Show him how much you've learned."

Rei eagerly wraps her lips around your cock again. This time she doesn't hold back, taking you deep into her throat right away. She gags but pushes through it, bobbing her head faster.

"That's it baby, fuck your throat on his big cock," Ning encourages. She reaches down to play with Rei's tits through her bra as she continues sucking you off.

Your cock throbs as you watch your ex-girlfriends work together to pleasure you. They take turns deep throating you, each with their own technique - Ning rough and demanding, Rei slower but just as deep.

"Want to see something really hot?" Ning asks with a wicked grin. When you nod, she guides your cock between both their mouths. They kiss around the head, tongues swirling together as they share your length.

"Holy fuck," you groan at the sight. Their lips meet around your shaft as they work their way down, taking turns going deeper while the other licks and sucks whatever they can reach.

"Tastes so good," Rei moans, pulling back to catch her breath. Her lipstick is smeared across your cock now too. "Love sharing his cock with you."

Ning responds by deep throating you again, gagging loudly as she takes you to the base. When she pulls back, Rei immediately follows suit, forcing herself down until her nose touches your pelvis.

"Look at these slutty girls, fighting over who can choke on your cock better," Ning purrs. She grabs Rei's hair, holding her down as she gags. "Show him how much you love it baby."

Rei's throat spasms around your length as tears stream down her face, but she doesn't pull back until Ning releases her. She gasps for air when she finally comes up, strings of drool connecting her lips to your cock.

"My turn," Ning demands, immediately swallowing your length again. She bobs her head frantically, making obscene wet sounds as she fucks her own throat on your cock. Rei watches in awe, slowly stroking herself through her panties.

"Fuck, I'm getting close," you warn them, your balls tightening as both girls continue their oral assault. They work together even faster now, determined to make you cum.

"Want to see who can take your load deeper?" Ning suggests breathlessly between sucks. "Whoever makes you cum gets first fuck later."

"Deal," Rei agrees eagerly. She wraps her lips around your cock again, taking you deep into her throat. Her soft moans vibrate around your shaft as she bobs her head faster.

"Don't hog it," Ning complains after a minute, pulling Rei off to take her turn. She immediately starts deep throating you roughly, her nose pressing against your pelvis with each thrust.

They continue trading off, each trying to outdo the other. Ning gags loudly as she forces herself down on your length, while Rei focuses on working her tongue along your shaft as she takes you deep.

"Gonna cum," you groan as the pressure builds. Both girls fight to get their mouths on your cock first.

Ning wins, wrapping her lips around your head just as you start to explode. She takes you deep into her throat, swallowing your first few spurts before pulling back to let Rei have some.

Rei eagerly accepts your cock into her mouth, moaning as you continue cumming. They take turns swallowing your load, passing your throbbing length back and forth between their cum-covered lips.

"Don't waste a drop," Ning orders as Rei sucks the last few spurts from your sensitive cock. When she's done, they kiss deeply, sharing the taste of your cum between them.

You watch in awe as your ex-girlfriends make out, their tongues sliding together as they swap your load. Some of it drips down their chins, making them giggle and lick each other clean.

"Fuck, that was hot," you groan, your cock already starting to harden again at the sight. "You two are incredible."

"Just wait," Ning purrs, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. "We're just getting started. I won since I made you cum first, so I get first ride."

"That's fair," Rei agrees with a shy smile, her lips still shiny with your cum and their shared saliva. "But I get to sit on his face while you ride him."

Your cock throbs fully hard again as they discuss their plans.

This is going to be a very interesting Christmas Eve indeed.

"Look how hard he's getting already," Ning notes with satisfaction, wrapping her small hand around your length. "Ready for round two baby?"

You nod eagerly as both girls climb onto the bed with you. Their mouths may have just drained you dry, but watching them share your load has you aching to be inside them again.

"Let's get more comfortable first," Rei suggests, reaching behind to unhook her bra. Her breasts spill free, making your mouth water at the sight.

"Good idea," Ning agrees, hooking her thumbs in her tiny panties. She slides them down her slim legs teasingly slow, revealing her smooth pussy.

You lie back on the bed, stroking yourself as you watch them strip completely naked. The contrast between their bodies is incredible - Ning's petite frame and small perky tits, Rei's soft curves and full breasts.

"Fuck, I missed seeing you both like this," you groan as they crawl toward you on the bed.

"Ready to get that cock inside me?" Ning purrs, straddling your hips. Her small hand wraps around your shaft, guiding it to her dripping entrance. "Been dreaming about riding this big dick again."

"And I've been dreaming about your tongue," Rei adds, pulling her panties aside and moving to straddle your face. Her thick thighs frame your view as she lowers her pussy toward your mouth.

You groan as both girls position themselves - Ning slowly sinking down on your cock while Rei hovers her wet cunt just above your lips. The dual sensation of Ning's tight pussy stretching around you and Rei's sweet scent filling your nostrils has your head spinning.

"Fuck, still so big," Ning moans as she takes you deeper. Her small body trembles as she adjusts to your size. "Stretching my little pussy so good."

You reach up to grip Rei's soft hips, pulling her down onto your eager tongue. She gasps as you immediately start licking and sucking her swollen clit, her thighs quivering on either side of your head.

"Oh god," Rei whimpers, grinding against your mouth. "Your tongue feels amazing..."

Ning starts bouncing on your cock, her tight pussy gripping you like a vice with each thrust. You can feel how wet she is, her juices coating your shaft as she rides you faster.

"Look at this slutty little pussy taking that whole cock," Ning pants, rolling her hips. "Missed getting stretched out like this."

You moan into Rei's cunt as Ning picks up speed, her small tits bouncing with each drop. The vibrations make Rei grind harder against your face, smearing her wetness across your lips and chin.

"Fuck his face baby," Ning encourages, reaching forward to play with Rei's full breasts. "Use that tongue while I ride this big cock."

Rei does just that, rolling her hips as you eat her out hungrily. Your tongue alternates between fucking into her dripping hole and flicking across her sensitive clit. Her thighs tremble around your head as she gets closer to the edge.

Meanwhile, Ning is practically bouncing off your cock now, lifting until just the tip remains before slamming back down. The wet sounds of her pussy taking your length fill the room along with her desperate moans.

"So fucking deep," she gasps, her inner walls clenching around you. "Hitting all the right spots..."

You grunt into Rei's pussy as Ning's pace becomes frantic. Her small body is covered in a light sheen of sweat as she works herself on your cock, chasing her pleasure.

"Play with her tits," Ning orders breathlessly. "Make her cum on your tongue while I ride this dick."

Your hands move from Rei's hips to her full breasts, squeezing and pinching her hard nipples. She cries out, grinding her pussy harder against your eager mouth as you continue devouring her.

"Fuck, I'm getting close," Rei whimpers, her thighs shaking. "Don't stop, please don't stop..."

You focus your attention on her swollen clit, sucking it between your lips while your tongue flicks rapidly. Her pussy floods with more wetness, coating your face as she rides the edge.

Ning's own orgasm is building too, her tight walls fluttering around your throbbing cock. She leans forward to kiss Rei deeply, swallowing her moans as you continue eating her out.

"Cum for us baby," Ning purrs against Rei's lips. "Soak his face with that sweet pussy while I milk his cock."

That pushes Rei over the edge. She cries out, her thick thighs clamping around your head as she cums hard on your tongue. You keep licking and sucking, drawing out her orgasm as she trembles above you.

"My turn," Ning gasps, bouncing even faster on your cock. Her small body is practically vibrating as she chases her release. "Gonna cum all over this big fucking dick..."

You grip her slim hips, helping her ride you as Rei recovers from her orgasm. Your cock throbs inside Ning's tight pussy, getting closer to your own climax.

"Fill me up," Ning demands, her walls clenching rhythmically. "Want to feel that hot cum deep inside me..."

Rei moves off your face, giving you a perfect view of Ning's lithe body taking your cock. Her small tits bounce wildly as she slams herself down, her pussy making obscene wet sounds.

"So fucking close," Ning whines, her movements becoming erratic. "Gonna cum, gonna cum..."

You thrust up to meet her bounces, making her scream as you hit even deeper. Her tight pussy spasms around your length as she finally tips over the edge, cumming hard on your cock.

"Don't stop," she gasps, still riding through her orgasm. "Keep fucking this tight little pussy..."

Rei moves behind Ning, reaching around to play with her small tits and sensitive clit. The added stimulation makes Ning cry out, her pussy clenching even tighter around you.

"Fill her up, daddy" Rei purrs, pinching Ning's nipples. "Give her that hot load she's been begging for."

Your own orgasm builds quickly as both girls work together. Ning's pussy milks your cock while Rei's hands roam over her sweaty body, tweaking her nipples and rubbing her clit.

"Gonna cum," you grunt, your balls tightening. "Fuck, I'm gonna cum..."

"Do it," Ning demands, slamming herself down one final time. "Breed this tight fucking pussy!"

You explode inside her, flooding her clenching walls with rope after rope of hot cum. She moans as she feels you pulsing, grinding her hips to milk every last drop from your throbbing cock.

When you finally finish pumping her full, Ning collapses forward onto your chest. Your cock slowly softens inside her well-used pussy, both of you panting heavily.

"Fuck, I missed that," she sighs contentedly. "Nobody fills me up like you do."

"My turn next," Rei reminds her with a playful smack on her ass. "Once he's ready to go again..."

You groan as Ning slowly lifts off your sensitive cock, your mixed fluids dripping from her stretched hole. The sight of your cum leaking out of her has your dick already starting to twitch with renewed interest.

"Look how wet and messy you made me," Ning purrs, spreading her pussy lips to show how thoroughly you filled her. "Want to clean me up, Rei?"

Rei bites her lip and nods eagerly. You watch in awe as she moves between Ning's legs, your cock twitches back to life as you watch Rei eagerly lapping up your cum from Ning's dripping pussy. Her tongue works methodically, gathering every drop that leaks out while Ning squirms and moans above her.

"Such a good girl, cleaning up daddy's mess," Ning purrs, grinding against Rei's eager mouth. "Make sure you get it all."

Rei moans into Ning's pussy, her thick ass swaying as she continues her task. The sight of her tongue sliding through Ning's folds, gathering the mixture of cum and pussy juice, has your cock fully hard again in no time.

"Look how hard you're making daddy," Ning points out, noticing your renewed erection. "I think he's ready for round three."

Rei pulls back from Ning's pussy, her lips and chin shiny with your combined fluids. "Please daddy," she whimpers, crawling toward you. "Need your big cock inside me now..."

"Since you asked so nicely," you growl, pulling her thick body against yours. Her soft curves press against your hard muscles as you claim her mouth in a deep kiss, tasting yourself and Ning on her tongue.

"How do you want me, daddy?" Rei asks breathlessly when you break the kiss. Her pussy is already dripping, leaving wet marks on your thigh.

"On your back," you command. "Want to watch those big tits bounce while I fuck you."

Rei eagerly lies back on the bed, spreading her thick thighs to reveal her soaked pussy. Her full breasts jiggle enticingly as she gets comfortable, looking up at you with needy eyes.

"Please daddy," she whimpers again, reaching down to spread her pussy lips. "Need you so bad..."

"Look how wet she is for you," Ning purrs, moving to kneel beside Rei's head. "Such a needy little slut."

You position yourself between Rei's spread thighs, rubbing your hard cock through her dripping folds. She gasps and bucks her hips, trying to get you inside her.

"Patience, baby girl," you growl, continuing to tease her entrance. "Beg for daddy's cock."

"Please daddy, please fuck me," Rei whines, her pussy clenching around nothing. "Need your big cock stretching my tight little hole..."

"Good girl," you praise, slowly pushing just the tip inside her. Her warm walls immediately grip you, trying to pull you deeper.

"More daddy, please more," she begs, her thick thighs trembling. "Fill me up like you did Ning..."

You grab her soft hips and thrust forward, burying your full length inside her in one smooth motion. Rei cries out, her back arching off the bed as you stretch her pussy.

"Fuck, still so tight," you groan, giving her a moment to adjust. Her inner walls pulse around your cock, squeezing you deliciously.

"Move daddy, please," Rei whimpers after a few seconds. "Need you to fuck me..."

You start with slow, deep strokes, watching your cock disappear into her greedy pussy again and again. Her full breasts bounce with each thrust, drawing your attention.

"Play with her tits," you tell Ning, who immediately complies. She reaches down to squeeze and pinch Rei's nipples, making her moan louder.

"Such sensitive nipples," Ning teases, rolling the hard buds between her fingers. "Love watching these big tits bounce while daddy fucks you."

You pick up speed, driving your cock deeper into Rei's willing hole. The wet sounds of your fucking fill the room along with her desperate moans and whimpers.

"Harder daddy, please harder," she begs, her pussy clenching around you. "Want to feel you for days..."

You grip her thick thighs, spreading them wider as you start pounding into her roughly. Your balls slap against her ass with each thrust, adding to the lewd symphony of sounds.

"Take that cock baby," Ning encourages, still playing with Rei's bouncing tits. "Show daddy what a good fuck toy you are."

Rei's moans get higher pitched as you fuck her faster, her pussy getting wetter with each stroke. You can feel her inner walls starting to flutter, signaling her approaching orgasm.

"Getting close already?" you tease, angling your hips to hit her sweet spot. "Such a sensitive little slut."

"Yes daddy, yes," she cries out, her thick thighs trembling. "Gonna cum on your big cock..."

"Not yet," you growl, slowing your thrusts. "Good girls ask permission first."

"Please daddy," Rei whines desperately. "Please let me cum... need it so bad..."

You respond by fucking her harder, making her full body jiggle with the force of your thrusts. Her pussy is practically gushing now, soaking the sheets beneath you.

"Beg better," you demand, reaching down to rub her swollen clit. "Show daddy how badly you need it."

"Please daddy, please let me cum on your cock," Rei sobs, her back arching. "Been such a good girl, need it so bad... please daddy, please..."

"Cum for daddy," you finally grant permission, pounding into her g-spot while rubbing her clit faster. "Show us what a good little slut you are."

Rei screams as she explodes around your cock, her pussy clamping down hard. You don't slow your thrusts, fucking her through her intense orgasm as she thrashes beneath you.

"That's it baby, soak daddy's cock," Ning encourages, pinching Rei's nipples harder. "Such a good girl, cumming so hard for us..."

Before Rei can fully recover, you flip her over onto her hands and knees. Her thick ass jiggles as you immediately slam back inside her oversensitive pussy.

"Daddy!" she cries out, her arms giving out so her face presses into the mattress. "Too much..."

"Take it baby," you growl, gripping her hips as you pound into her from behind. "Know you can handle it."

Ning moves to lie beneath Rei's hanging breasts, sucking one of her nipples into her mouth while playing with the other. The dual stimulation has Rei moaning uncontrollably, her pussy clenching around you again.

"Look at those tits swing," you groan, watching them bounce with each thrust. "Love fucking this thick body."

"Please daddy," Rei whimpers, pushing back to meet your thrusts. "Need your cum... want you to fill me up..."

You fuck her harder, your hands leaving marks on her soft hips as you use her pussy. The sight of your cock disappearing between her thick ass cheeks drives you wild.

"Gonna cum again baby?" you tease, feeling her walls starting to flutter. "Getting close?"

"Yes daddy, yes," she sobs, her whole body trembling. "Please let me cum again..."

"Cum with daddy this time," you grunt, your own orgasm building. "Want to feel that pussy milk my cock..."

Rei screams into the mattress as she cums again, her pussy spasming around your length. The sensation of her walls squeezing you triggers your own release.

"Take it all," you growl, slamming deep as you start pumping her full of cum. "Every last fucking drop..."

Your cock pulses inside her, flooding her pussy with rope after rope of hot cum. Rei whimpers and moans as you fill her, her walls still fluttering with aftershocks.

When you finally finish emptying yourself inside her, you slowly pull out to admire your work. Your cum immediately starts leaking from her well-used hole, dripping down her thick thighs.

"My turn to clean up," Ning says eagerly, moving between Rei's legs. She spreads Rei's ass cheeks, watching more cum leak out before diving in with her tongue.

Rei gasps and squirms as Ning eagerly licks up your mixed fluids, cleaning her thoroughly just like Rei did earlier. The sight has your spent cock giving an interested twitch, despite having just cum.

"Such good girls," you praise, running your hands over both their bodies as Ning continues her task. "Taking daddy's cum so well..."

"Thank you daddy," they respond in unison, making you chuckle.

This is definitely turning out to be the best Christmas Eve ever.

You watch contentedly as Ning finishes cleaning Rei's pussy, gathering every drop of cum she can find. Both girls are thoroughly satisfied, covered in sweat and various fluids from your activities.

"Think we wore daddy out," Ning giggles, noticing your softened cock. "At least for now..."

"Just need a little recovery time," you assure them, pulling both girls close. Their different body types press against you - Ning's small frame on one side, Rei's soft curves on the other.

"Good thing we have all night," Rei says with a shy smile, trailing her fingers over your chest. "And tomorrow..."

"And the day after," Ning adds mischievously. "Hope you didn't have any other Christmas plans..."

You groan as both girls start kissing your neck and chest, their hands roaming over your body. Despite having just cum twice, you can feel your cock starting to show interest again.

"Insatiable little sluts," you mutter fondly, running your hands through their hair. "Going to be the death of me."

—

You wake up to the eerie quiet of Christmas morning, only in your boxers, the absence of warmth where you swear there were two bodies pressed against you last night. For a second, you wonder if you imagined it—the laughter, the whispers, the sinful tangle of limbs. But the faint ache in your thighs and the scent of something heady lingering on the sheets say otherwise.

You rub your eyes, half-resigned to the idea it was all some cruel dream. Until the door crashes open, a sharp burst of sound followed by an explosion of giggles. Ning and Rei storm in like chaos incarnate, balancing a tray loaded with what looks like breakfast. Both are wearing your shirts—oversized, nearly swallowing their petite frames—and nothing else except Santa hats perched jauntily on their heads. The shirts are just long enough to tease and short enough to torment.

“Merry fucking Christmas!” Ning announces, grinning like she’s just won the lottery. She strides over, her bare legs pale against the dark fabric, and plops the tray onto your lap without much ceremony. Rei follows, quieter, her cheeks pink but her lips curved in that shy smile of hers. Her thighs brush the edge of the bed as she sits, and you can’t help but notice how they press together, soft and inviting.

“Uh…” You’re still processing. “What is this?”

“Breakfast, dumbass,” Ning says, rolling her eyes like you’ve asked her why the sky is blue. “We made it for you. Well, Rei did most of it. I just supervised.”

“I told you not to add that much whipped cream,” Rei mutters, poking Ning in the ribs.

Ning yelps, swatting her away. “Yeah, yeah. He likes it sweet, don’t you, babe?”

You blink at them, at the tray loaded with steaming hot chocolate, toast, and what might be pancakes under a mountain of whipped cream. “You didn’t have to—”

“Shut up and eat,” Ning interrupts, jabbing a finger at you. “It’s Christmas. First one with the three of us. You’re eating, and then you’re getting your present.”

“Present?” You raise an eyebrow, suspicious. “What kind of present?”

They exchange a look. Ning’s grin stretches wider, and Rei ducks her head, suddenly very interested in smoothing out the bedspread. “You’ll see,” Ning says, her voice dripping with mischief.

Your stomach growls, betraying you, and you sigh, picking up the mug of hot chocolate. It’s ridiculously sweet, just like Ning said, but there’s a warmth to it that feels… right. Comforting, even. You glance at them, perched on either side of you, their legs tucked under them like they’re settling in for a long haul.

“Seriously, though,” you start, setting the mug down. “This is… I mean, you didn’t have to go through all this trouble.”

Rei shakes her head, her voice soft but firm. “It’s not trouble. We wanted to.”

“Yeah,” Ning adds, leaning back on her hands, the movement making the shirt ride up just a little too high. “Besides, it’s kinda our fault you’re in this mess. Least we can do is spoil you a little.”

You snort. “Mess? That what we’re calling this?”

“Hey, you’re the one who couldn’t decide between us,” Ning shoots back, her eyes sparkling. “We’re just making it easier for you.”

Rei nudges her, her cheeks turning a deeper shade of pink. “Ning…”

“What? It’s true.” Ning turns back to you, her grin taking on a sharper edge. “Anyway, hurry up. You’re gonna love what we’ve got planned.”

You eye them warily but dig into the breakfast, their chatter filling the room as you eat. Ning keeps making snarky comments about the whipped cream, and Rei keeps trying—and failing—to shush her. It’s chaotic and ridiculous and more than a little surreal, but it feels good. Like maybe, just maybe, this crazy arrangement might actually work.

When you finally finish, Rei takes the tray, and Ning bounces to her feet, practically vibrating with excitement. “Alright, time for your present.”

“What is it?” you ask, already knowing you won’t get a straight answer.

Ning smirks, her eyes dark with promise. “Like I said, surprise.”

Rei stands too, her hands fidgeting with the hem of the shirt, but there’s a glint of something in her eyes—something bold and a little dangerous. “Just… go with it,” she says, her voice quiet but steady.

They exchange a glance and, as if on cue, toss off their Santa hats. Before you can say another word, they’re on you.

The taste of hot chocolate clings to your tongue, warm and sweet, as Ning’s lips claim yours, bold and insistent. Her kisses always feel like a challenge, like she’s daring you to keep up, and you never back down. The moment she pulls away, Rei takes over, her touch softer, slower, like she’s savoring every second. You’re caught between them, your head spinning, and it’s hard to tell where one ends and the other begins.

“You two are gonna kill me,” you mumble, your voice rough with affection and something deeper, heavier.

Ning smirks against your neck, her teeth scraping lightly at your skin. “That’s the plan, babe.”

Rei giggles, her fingers tracing idle patterns on your chest. “We’ll make sure you enjoy it.”

They pause for a moment, shifting their attention to each other, and you’re helpless but to watch as they lean in. Ning’s hand slides up to cup Rei’s cheek, tilting her head slightly, and then their mouths meet. It’s slow at first, teasing, their tongues brushing, testing, and then Ning deepens it, her free hand tangling in Rei’s hair. The sound of their lips, wet and needy, fills the air, and your cock twitches at the sight.

“Jesus Christ,” you breathe, unable to look away. “You two are fucking unreal.”

Ning pulls back just enough to smirk at you, her lips shiny and swollen. “Like what you see?”

“Always,” you admit, your voice thick. “Not sure I’ll ever get tired of it.”

“You better not,” Ning teases, her eyes sparkling with mischief. She turns back to Rei, her thumb brushing over her bottom lip. “He’s hooked.”

Rei blushes but doesn’t shy away, her gaze flickering to you. “Good. I don’t want to share him with anyone else.”

“Neither do I,” Ning says, her tone playful but edged with something serious. “Which is why we’ve got a little surprise for you.”

Your eyebrows lift, curiosity piqued. “Oh yeah? Gonna tell me what it is now?”

Ning grins, leaning in close enough that her breath tickles your ear. “We talked, Rei and I. And we decided… you get to take her anal virginity today. Merry Christmas, babe.”

The words hit you like a freight train, and you blink at them, your brain scrambling to catch up. “Wait, what?”

Rei’s cheeks are flaming now, but she doesn’t look away. Instead, she presses closer, her hands splaying against your chest. “It’s true,” she murmurs, her voice soft but steady. “I want you to take my anal virginity. Just like you did with Ning.”

“Holy shit,” you say, looking between them. “You’re serious?”

“Yes, daddy,” Rei whispers, her eyes wide and sincere. “I want it. I want you to be the one.”

You swallow hard, your pulse pounding in your ears. “Rei, are you sure? I mean, this isn’t—”

“I’m sure,” she cuts you off gently, her lips brushing against your skin. “I trust you. Just… take it slow, okay? I want it to feel good.”

“Of course,” you promise, your voice low. “I’ll take care of you, baby.”

“Damn right you will,” Ning interjects, already tugging at your waistband. She yanks your underwear down with a triumphant grin, your cock springing free. “But first, let me get this nice and wet for her.”

Her hand wraps around you, stroking lazily as her tongue darts out to lick the tip. The sensation makes you hiss, your hips jerking involuntarily. Rei watches, her teeth worrying at her bottom lip, her hand trailing down to rest on your stomach.

“Relax,” she whispers, leaning down to press a kiss to your chest. “Let us take care of you.”

Ning’s lips close around the head of your cock, warm and wet, and you groan, your fingers digging into the sheets. She works you over with practiced ease, her tongue swirling, her cheeks hollowing as she takes you deeper. Rei’s kisses move lower, her mouth brushing over your abs, her breath hot against your skin.

“You’re gonna love it,” Ning murmurs around you, her voice muffled but clear. “Fucking her tight little ass. She’s been dying for it.”

Rei nods, her hand slipping lower to cradle your balls, her touch tentative but eager. “I want to feel you everywhere,” she says softly. “Please, daddy. Make me yours.”

Your head tilts back, a groan tearing from your throat. “Fuck, you two are gonna ruin me.”

Ning doesn’t hold back—she never does. Her spit drips down your shaft, glossy and obscene, as she strokes you with both hands, twisting at just the right angle to make your toes curl. Every few strokes, she leans in to lap at the head, her tongue flicking over the sensitive slit, teasing a groan out of you. She glances up, her dark eyes locking with yours, her lips curling into a smirk that’s equal parts wicked and playful.

“God, you’re so fucking hard already,” she murmurs, her voice dripping with satisfaction. She spits again, the sound sharp and messy, the glob sliding down to pool at the base of your cock. “You like this, don’t you? Having me jerk you off while Rei’s being such a sweet little slut for you.”

Rei’s lips are soft against your chest, her kisses growing wetter, sloppier, as she works her way toward your nipple. Her breath is hot, her teeth grazing your skin before she closes her mouth around the sensitive bud. The sensation makes you jolt, a sharp gasp escaping you, and you tangle your fingers in her hair, giving it a gentle tug.

“Good girl,” you murmur, your voice rough with arousal. Rei’s whole body seems to shiver at the praise, and she looks up at you with those big, eager eyes, her cheeks flushed.

“You like that, huh?” Ning snickers, her hand squeezing the base of your cock as her lips kiss along the shaft. “She loves being called a good girl, don’t you, Rei?”

Rei pulls back just long enough to nod, her voice soft but breathy. “Yes, daddy. I love it when you call me that.”

“Yeah?” You smirk, stroking her cheek with your thumb before tugging her hair a little harder, making her gasp. “Then be a good girl and keep sucking on me. Make me feel good.”

“Yes,” she whispers, her lips returning to your chest, her tongue swirling around your nipple. She moans softly as she sucks, her nails dragging lightly across your stomach, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

Meanwhile, Ning takes you deeper, her lips sliding down your length with practiced ease. She moans around you, the vibrations shooting straight to your core, and your hips buck involuntarily, pushing just a little further into her mouth. She takes it like a champ, her throat relaxing as she swallows you, her spit making everything slick and filthy.

“Shit, Ning,” you groan, your free hand gripping the back of her head. “You’re so fucking good at this. That mouth of yours—fuck—it’s like it was made for me.”

She pulls off with an audible pop, a trail of spit connecting her lips to your cock. “Damn right it was,” she purrs, her voice thick and sultry. “But I’m not done yet.”

She dives back in, her tongue running along the underside of your shaft, tracing every vein, every ridge, until you’re twitching in her grasp. She pauses at the head, her lips wrapping around it as she sucks hard, her cheeks hollowing. Her hand works your base, twisting and stroking in rhythm with her mouth, and you feel yourself getting dangerously close to the edge.

“Fuck, Ning,” you gasp, your head falling back against the pillows. “You’re gonna make me cum if you keep that up.”

“Not yet,” she teases, pulling back to kiss the tip, her tongue flicking out to taste the bead of pre-cum there. “We’ve got plans for this cock, remember? Can’t let you blow it all in my mouth.”

Rei giggles softly against your chest, her lips brushing over your skin as she whispers, “Don’t you want to save it for me, daddy? I want to feel it inside me. Please?”

Her words hit you like a lightning bolt, and you groan, your hips jerking as Ning’s mouth works you over one last time before she pulls off completely. She sits back on her heels, her lips swollen and shiny, her hand still stroking you slowly as she grins up at you.

“Ready to give her what she wants?” she asks, her voice dripping with mischief. “Because she’s been begging for it, babe. And I think she’s earned it.”

“You're right. Okay, Rei, get on all fours on the bed.”

You stand up, your eyes raking over Rei as she slowly peels off the oversized shirt, letting it fall to the floor. Her pale skin glows in the soft light, and the way she shyly glances back at you makes your cock twitch with anticipation. Without hesitation, she climbs onto the bed, her movements deliberate, her curves on full display as she lowers herself onto all fours.

"Like this, daddy?" she asks, her voice trembling just enough to make your chest tighten.

"Just like that, baby," you murmur, stepping closer, your gaze locked on the tight, pink pucker of her ass. It clenches slightly as if in anticipation, and the sight is almost enough to undo you right there.

Beside you, Ning smirks, her eyes darting between you and Rei. "Fuck, she looks good like this. So eager to please. You better give her everything she deserves."

You crouch behind Rei, your hands gripping the soft curve of her hips. "You’re goddamn perfect," you tell her, your voice low and rough. "But first, we’re gonna make this nice and wet."

Rei whimpers softly, her head dropping forward as she presses her cheek to the bed. "Yes, daddy. Please… make it feel good."

Your tongue darts out, teasing the rim of her asshole, and Rei gasps, her back arching as her body responds to the sudden jolt of sensation. You take your time, licking slow, deliberate circles around the sensitive flesh, savoring the way it twitches under your touch.

"Shit," Ning breathes, her voice heavy with arousal. She climbs onto the bed beside Rei, her fingers sliding down to part the folds of Rei's dripping pussy. "Look at her, already soaking wet. You really do love this, don’t you, Rei?"

"Y-yes," Rei stammers, her voice muffled against the mattress. "It feels so… oh god… so good."

Ning chuckles, her fingers slipping inside Rei’s slick heat, curling just enough to make her moan. "Once you feel daddy’s thick cock in that pretty little ass, you’re never gonna want it any other way. Trust me, I know."

You hum in agreement, your tongue pressing more insistently now, the tip dipping just inside her tight entrance. Rei lets out a choked cry, her body trembling as she struggles to keep still.

"Fuck, you taste so good, baby," you murmur, your breath hot against her skin. "I could eat this ass all day."

"She’s already so tight," Ning says, her fingers pumping slowly in and out of Rei’s pussy. "You’re gonna have to take it real slow at first. Don’t break her too quick, daddy."

Rei whimpers at Ning’s words, her hips pressing back against your mouth. You take that as an invitation, thrusting your tongue deeper, swirling it inside her while your hands grip her ass, spreading her wider for better access. The slick sounds of your tongue and Ning’s fingers fill the air, mingling with Rei’s breathless moans.

"Daddy, please," Rei whines, her voice high and desperate. "I need you. I need you so bad."

"Not yet, baby," you say, pulling back just long enough to catch your breath. Your lips are slick with spit and her taste, and the sight of her writhing beneath you sends a surge of possessive lust through your veins. "We’re gonna take our time. I want you to beg for it."

Rei turns her head, her eyes glassy with need. "I’m begging. Please, daddy, I need you inside me."

Ning laughs, her fingers sliding out of Rei and trailing up to rub slow circles around her clit. "Look at her. So needy. You’ve got her hooked already, and you haven’t even fucked her yet."

You grin, leaning in to press one last, lingering kiss to Rei’s asshole before sitting back, your hand stroking your cock slowly. "Alright, baby. Let’s see how much you can take.”

You kneel behind Rei, taking a moment to admire the view—her body trembling with anticipation, her back arched just enough to push her ass higher into the air. The way her tight little hole flexes, opening and closing, as if beckoning you, makes your cock twitch painfully.

“You ready, baby?” you ask, your voice low and steady, but the hunger behind it is impossible to miss.

Rei turns her head just enough to glance back at you, her cheeks flushed and her eyes wide with need. “Yes, daddy. Please… I want you to make me ready.”

“Good girl,” you murmur, running a hand over the curve of her ass before spreading her cheeks apart, exposing her fully. “Gotta take this slow. Don’t wanna hurt my pretty girl, do I?”

Ning snickers beside you, her fingers still lazily playing with Rei’s pussy, occasionally brushing her clit just to make her squirm. “She can take it, babe. Trust me, I’ve seen how much of a slut she’s becoming for you.”

Rei whines at Ning’s words, burying her face into the bed. “I’m not… I just—oh god, daddy—please…”

You press your thumb gently against her entrance, teasing her with just the barest pressure. “What’s that, baby? You just what? Say it.”

“I just want you,” Rei stammers, her voice muffled but desperate. “I want to feel you. I want to take you.”

“That’s my girl,” you say, slowly pushing the tip of your thumb inside her. The resistance is immediate, her tight ring of muscle clenching around you, but you’re patient. You wait until she relaxes, the tension melting away, before pushing deeper. “Fuck, you’re so tight, Rei. You’re squeezing me already.”

Rei moans softly, her hips shifting back against your hand. “It feels… weird, but good. Please don’t stop.”

“Oh, I’m not stopping,” you assure her, pulling your thumb out slowly before replacing it with your index finger. The slickness from your spit and her arousal makes it easier, but you still go slow, taking your time. “Let me know if it’s too much, alright?”

“She’ll be fine,” Ning chimes in, leaning down to press a kiss to Rei’s shoulder. “She’s tougher than she looks. Isn’t that right, Rei?”

“Yes,” Rei whispers, her voice trembling. “I can take it. I want to take it.”

You smile, curling your finger inside her, watching the way her body reacts. “That’s my good girl,” you murmur, adding a second finger without warning. Rei gasps, her back arching further as her hands claw at the sheets.

“Oh my god, daddy,” she whimpers, her voice high and breathy. “It’s so… full.”

“And we’re just getting started,” you say, scissoring your fingers gently to stretch her. “You’re doing so good for me, baby. Just relax.”

Ning grins, her fingers dipping back into Rei’s soaked pussy. “She’s so wet, babe. You’ve got her dripping all over the bed. I bet she’s gonna be addicted to this by the time you’re done with her.”

Rei shakes her head, though her moans betray her. “I’m not… I just—oh, fuck, daddy, that feels so good.”

You add a third finger, taking your time to work her open, the resistance gradually giving way to acceptance. Rei’s body quivers under your touch, her moans growing louder with each slow thrust of your hand.

“Think she’s ready for you yet?” Ning asks, her voice dripping with mischief. “Or should we keep teasing her a little longer?”

You smirk, leaning down to kiss Rei’s lower back. “What do you think, baby? You ready for my cock, or do you want me to keep stretching you?”

“Please,” Rei cries out, her voice breaking. “I’m ready. I want you, daddy. Please, I need you.”

“Patience, sweetheart,” you say, your fingers thrusting one last time before pulling out completely. “I’ll give you what you need. But you’re gonna have to beg for it first.”

"I'm begging you daddy," she whimpers. "Please, I need your cock in my tight little asshole!"

"Fuck, you're so adorable like that, so needy. Alright, princess, I'll give you what you want so badly.”

Ning crouches beside you, her dark eyes glinting with mischief as she wraps her hand around your throbbing cock.

“Let me take care of this first,” Ning purrs, her tongue darting out to flick across the sensitive tip. A shiver runs up your spine as she presses a sloppy kiss to the head before sliding her lips down your shaft, her spit pooling as her hand twists expertly at the base.

Rei whimpers, glancing over her shoulder, her cheeks flushed and her lips parted. “Please,” she whispers, her voice barely audible. “Daddy… I’m ready.”

“Patience, baby,” you murmur, pressing her spine downward, making her arch her back even more. Her ass rises higher, her glistening folds peeking just beneath her tight entrance. It’s enough to make your cock twitch in Ning’s mouth, her satisfied hum vibrating around you.

Ning pulls back with an obscene pop, a string of saliva connecting her swollen lips to your cock. She smirks up at you, her hand still stroking as she angles your cock toward Rei’s tight hole. “She’s all yours, babe,” she says, her voice low and teasing. “Make her feel it.”

The slickness of Ning’s spit glides easily as you rub the tip of your cock against Rei’s tight entrance, teasing her. She gasps, her hips jerking back slightly, her soft cries music to your ears. “Shh, baby,” you soothe, one hand steadying her hip while the other guides you into her. “We’re going slow.”

Rei’s breath catches as the head breaches her, her body tensing, then softening under your touch. “Oh god,” she whimpers, her fingers clutching the sheets. “It’s—it’s so much…”

“You’re doing so good,” you murmur, your voice thick with desire. Inch by inch, you press into her, the tight heat of her untouched ass gripping you like a vice. Ning’s fingers trace lazy patterns on Rei’s spine, her voice dripping with encouragement.

“That’s it, Rei,” Ning coos, watching intently as you stretch her. “You’re taking him so well, like the good girl you are.”

You grip Rei’s hips firmly, feeling the tremble in her body as you push deeper, the overwhelming tightness of her ass gripping you like a vice. Her breath hitches, a soft cry escaping her lips as her fingers claw at the sheets. “It hurts,” she whimpers, her voice trembling, but she doesn’t pull away. She stays still, obedient, her back arching slightly to give you better access.

“I know, baby,” you murmur, leaning forward to press a reassuring kiss between her shoulder blades. “You’re doing so good. Just breathe, okay? Let me in slowly.”

Ning crawls closer, her hands gliding over Rei’s trembling thighs. “That’s it,” she whispers, her lips brushing against Rei’s ear as her fingers stroke soft circles over her skin. “You’re such a good girl for him, Rei. Taking his cock so deep in that tight little ass… You’re perfect.”

Rei’s breath comes in short, shaky gasps, her body taut beneath you. Every inch you press into her feels like a battle, her tightness squeezing you so hard it almost makes you dizzy. But she doesn’t pull away. She takes it, her resolve clear in the way she pushes back against you, even as her whimpers grow louder.

“Good girl,” Ning purrs, kissing the back of Rei’s neck. Her hands glide upward, cupping Rei’s breasts. Ning teases her, pinching one nipple lightly, drawing a sharp gasp from her lips. “See? You can take it. You’re made for this, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” Rei breathes, her voice barely a whisper. “I… I can do it. I want to do it—for you, daddy.”

Your cock twitches inside her at her words, the way her voice shakes but stays determined. You pull back slightly, the slickness of Ning’s saliva making it easier, then press forward again, inching deeper. Rei moans loudly this time, her head dropping forward as her body clenches around you.

“Relax, baby,” you say, your voice low and steady. One hand slips around to stroke her stomach, grounding her. “I’ve got you. You can take it.”

Ning leans in, her lips finding Rei’s cheek, then her jawline, soft and reassuring. “You’re doing so well,” she murmurs. Her free hand slides lower, brushing over Rei’s swollen clit, her touch feather-light. “Feel that? You’re so wet, Rei. You’re loving this, even if it hurts a little. You’re so fucking strong.”

Rei cries out as Ning’s fingers work her clit in slow, teasing circles, her body trembling but yielding under you. “Ning,” she gasps, her voice breaking. “Oh god, I—”

“She loves it,” Ning says, grinning wickedly at you as she increases the pressure on Rei’s sensitive nub. “Look at her, babe. She’s taking your cock so deep, so perfectly. She just needs a little help relaxing.”

Rei’s breathing turns into soft moans, her body slowly opening up as you sink the last inch inside her. The tight, velvety grip around your cock is almost unbearable, but you hold still, letting her adjust. Ning doesn’t stop, her lips peppering kisses down Rei’s neck and shoulders, her fingers working her clit with practiced ease.

“Daddy,” Rei whimpers, her voice raw. “It’s—it’s so much, but it feels…”

“Feels good, doesn’t it?” Ning finishes for her, her grin sharp as she kisses Rei’s parted lips. “You’re so fucking beautiful like this, Rei. So perfect for him.”

Rei nods weakly, her body relaxing just enough for you to start moving. You pull out slowly, almost all the way, before pushing back in, setting a deliberate, careful rhythm. Each thrust makes her moan louder, her cries a mixture of lingering pain and growing pleasure. Ning stays close, her hands roaming Rei’s body, her kisses keeping her grounded as you fuck her slowly, thoroughly.

“You’re mine,” you growl, gripping her hips tighter as you thrust into her. “Every part of you, Rei. You were made for me.”

“Yes, daddy,” Rei gasps, her voice high and breathless. “I’m yours. All of me. Please don’t stop.”

Your grip on Rei’s hips tightens, your fingers digging into her soft skin as you rock into her. Her ass clenches so tightly around you that every movement feels like it's pulling you deeper into an impossible grip, her body almost fighting you but yielding all the same. Rei’s gasps and broken cries fill the room, each one edged with pain but dripping with determination.

“You’re so fucking tight, baby,” you groan, leaning forward so your chest brushes her back. “I’m barely inside, and you’re squeezing me like you’re trying to keep me there.”

Rei shudders beneath you, her head hanging low, her damp hair clinging to her flushed cheeks. “I-I’m trying,” she whimpers, her voice trembling. “I w-want all of you, daddy. I’ll do it. Just—just don’t stop.”

“Good girl,” you growl, your voice dripping with praise and possession. “You’re so fucking brave, taking me like this. You’re going to let me ruin that tight little ass of yours, aren’t you?”

“Yes, daddy,” she gasps, her body trembling but arching back to meet you, her knees threatening to buckle. “I want it. Please, fuck me harder. I’ll be good—I’ll be so good for you.”

Your cock throbs inside her at her words, the way her voice shakes but carries no hesitation. You lean back, spreading her cheeks wider to watch yourself disappear into her. The sight is obscene—her hole stretched taut around your thick length, swallowing you inch by inch. “Look at this,” you hiss, one hand gripping the base of her spine while the other keeps her spread. “You’re so fucking small, and you’re still taking me like the perfect little slut you are.”

Ning, sprawled beside you, lets out a breathless laugh, her bare thighs glisten in the morning light as she runs her fingers between them, biting her lip. “God, you’re so fucking hot like this, Rei,” she murmurs, her tone dripping with arousal. “Taking him so deep, even though it hurts. You’re such a good girl, baby. You’re making me so wet just watching you.”

Rei lets out a choked moan, her body trembling harder as you begin to move faster, your thrusts growing more deliberate. “Fuck, daddy—it’s—oh god, it’s so much,” she cries, her voice high and breathless.

“You can handle it,” you snap, your tone sharp but full of pride. “You’re my brave little slut, aren’t you? You want this. You’ve been begging for it.”

Her head nods weakly, her voice breaking as she whimpers, “Yes, daddy. I w-want it. Please don’t stop. I’ll take it—I’ll take all of it.”

Your pace increases gradually, each thrust forcing a loud cry from her lips. She’s trembling under you, her body taut but pliant, her ass rising higher as you hold her open. Every plunge into her is met with her tight walls gripping you harder, the resistance making you groan in pleasure.

“Fuck, Rei,” you growl, your hands sliding down to squeeze her ass cheeks as you spread her even wider. “You’re so goddamn tight. I could stay buried in this perfect ass all night.”

Ning moans softly, her fingers working faster against her clit as she watches. “Keep talking to her,” she gasps, her other hand teasing her breasts. “She loves it. Tell her how good she’s being. Tell her how fucking perfect she looks with your cock stretching her like that.”

You lean down, your chest pressing against Rei’s back as you pick up speed, each thrust making her cry out louder. “You’re taking it so fucking well, baby,” you murmur against her ear, your voice rough. “You’re mine, Rei. Every part of you belongs to me, and I’m going to make sure you feel it every time you move tomorrow.”

Her moans are ragged now, her fingers clutching the sheets so tightly her knuckles are white. “Oh god,” she whimpers, her voice raw. “It hurts, daddy—but it feels—fuck—it feels so good. Please, don’t stop.”

“I’m not stopping,” you promise, your voice harsh with lust. “You’re gonna take everything I give you, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” she cries, her body shaking beneath you. “Yes, daddy. I’ll take it all. Please—please just keep fucking me.”

Your hips snap forward harder, faster now, the slick sounds of your cock sliding into her filling the room. Rei’s cries grow louder, her voice breaking with every thrust, but she doesn’t pull away. She braces herself, pushing back against you, her determination driving you wild.

“Fuck, look at her,” Ning breathes, her fingers moving in frantic circles over her clit. “She’s so fucking beautiful like this, isn’t she? Taking your cock like a goddamn champ.”

You smirk, gripping Rei’s hips harder as you slam into her, your thrusts deep and relentless now. “She’s perfect,” you growl, your voice dripping with possession. “This tight little ass was made for me.”

Rei sobs out a moan, her body shaking violently. “Daddy,” she whimpers, her voice barely audible over the sounds of your thrusts and Ning’s breathless cries. “I’m yours. Use me like your fucktoy. Please—don’t stop. I want it all.”

Your cock throbs inside her, the heat of her body driving you closer to the edge. “Yeah, you’re mine, Rei,” you groan, your voice rough and commanding. “Every part of you. And I’m not stopping until I ruin this perfect little ass.”

Your hips drive into Rei with a relentless rhythm now, the sound of your body meeting hers echoing sharply in the room. Rei's screams tear through the air, a blend of agony and pleasure so raw it sends a pulse of heat straight to your cock. Her face is buried in the sheets, her hair a damp mess as her ass rocks back to meet you, even as her legs shake from the effort.

“Fuck, daddy!” she wails, her voice breaking on the edge of a moan. “It—it hurts so much, but it feels—oh god—it feels so good! Please, don’t stop!”

“Goddamn, look at her,” Ning pants from her place beside you, her fingers slick as they work her clit in tight, desperate circles. She’s watching intently, her eyes drinking in the sight of Rei’s stretched, trembling body taking you over and over. Her lips curve into a wicked grin, her voice low and sultry as she says, “You should spank her.”

Your hips falter for a brief second, and you glance at her, sweat dripping from your brow. “Yeah?” you growl, your hands gripping Rei’s shaking hips tighter.

“Fuck yes,” Ning breathes, licking her lips. “Have you not noticed yet, babe? She loves it. The pain, the stretch—it’s driving her fucking wild. Behind that sweet, innocent face, she’s a filthy little whore who needs it.”

Rei lets out a choked gasp, her moans breaking as her body trembles harder beneath you. “N-Ning,” she stammers, her voice muffled by the sheets, but there’s no denial in her tone. Only embarrassment. And arousal.

“Is that true, Rei?” you ask, your voice dropping to a growl. You lean down, pressing your chest to her back as your cock drives even deeper into her ass. “Are you just a dirty little slut who loves the pain?”

Rei hesitates for a moment, her breath coming in shallow gasps, before she nods weakly, her voice trembling as she whispers, “Yes, daddy.”

“That’s my girl,” Ning purrs, her fingers dipping lower, slipping into her dripping pussy as she watches with a hungry grin. “Told you. She’s a whore for it. She wants you to use her, to hurt her, to make her scream. Isn’t that right, Rei?”

Rei’s face burns crimson, but she moans loudly, her body tightening around you as she stammers, “Y-yes, it’s true! I love it—oh god—I love it when you hurt me!”

Your cock throbs at her confession, and your lips curl into a dark smile. “Then you’ll fucking love this,” you growl, raising your hand and bringing it down hard on her ass. The slap echoes through the room, sharp and loud, and Rei screams, her body jolting forward as her cheeks jiggle from the impact.

“Fuck!” Rei cries, her voice high and ragged. “Do it again, daddy! Please, spank me!”

Ning’s laughter is breathless, her hand working faster between her legs as she watches. “See? I told you. She fucking loves it.”

You don’t hesitate, your hand coming down again, harder this time. Rei’s scream turns into a moan, her back arching as her ass turns a delicious shade of red. “You like that, baby?” you growl, your hand rubbing the stinging flesh before delivering another sharp slap. “You like feeling my hand on your ass while I fuck you like the little whore you are?”

“Yes, daddy!” Rei sobs, her voice thick with tears and lust. “I love it! I love it so much—oh god, don’t stop!”

Your hand rains down on her, each slap harder than the last, her cheeks bouncing beautifully with every impact. The sound of your hand meeting her skin mixes with her broken cries and moans, filling the room with an almost primal rhythm. Her body clenches tighter around you with each strike, driving you closer to the edge.

“Look at her,” Ning murmurs, her voice husky with arousal. Her fingers plunge into herself faster, her other hand squeezing her breast as she watches the scene unfold. “She’s such a fucking mess, and it’s perfect. Keep going, babe. Spank her harder. Make her feel it.”

You oblige, your hand coming down harder, leaving bright red marks on her pale skin. Rei’s cries grow louder, her voice hoarse, but she doesn’t pull away. Instead, she pushes back against you, her ass rising higher, begging for more.

“You’re such a good girl,” you growl, slamming into her harder, your cock driving deep into her tight, trembling hole. “Taking everything I give you. You love it, don’t you?”

“Yes!” Rei screams, her voice breaking. “I love it, daddy! I love being your dirty little slut!”

“That’s right,” Ning moans, her hips rocking as she fingers herself desperately. “You’re his filthy little whore, Rei. And you love every second of it.”

Your pace becomes merciless, every thrust a deep, punishing drive into Rei’s tight, trembling ass. Her high-pitched screams ring through the room, a symphony of pain and pleasure that pushes you further, makes your cock throb as her body writhes beneath you. Her hole squeezes you so tightly, it feels like she’s trying to pull you in deeper with every desperate moan.

“Fuck, baby,” you growl, slamming into her with a brutal rhythm that makes her ass ripple with each impact. “You’re screaming so loud for me. You love it, don’t you? You love how I’m wrecking your perfect little ass.”

“Yes, daddy!” Rei cries, her voice shaking, her hands clawing at the sheets as her whole body quivers. “I love it—I love how it hurts! Please, don’t stop!”

“Don’t you dare stop,” Ning chimes in, her voice breathless and full of raw heat as she kneels beside Rei, her body gleaming with sweat. Her fingers slide between her slick thighs, teasing her own dripping cunt as she watches the scene unfold. “She’s about to cum, babe. I can see it. She’s such a filthy little slut, she’s going to cum with your cock in her ass. Isn’t that right, Rei?”

Rei nods frantically, her face buried in the sheets as she screams, “I’m so close, daddy! Please, please make me cum! I need it—I want to cum with your cock in my ass!”

Her desperation sends a surge of heat through you, and you tighten your grip on her hips, pulling her back to meet every brutal thrust. Your free hand comes down on her ass again, hard, the slap echoing through the room as her skin turns a deeper shade of red. “You want to cum for me, baby?” you growl, spanking her again. “Then take it. Take all of me.”

Rei’s cries reach a fever pitch as you go all out, slapping her ass with every thrust, her cheeks bouncing under the force. “Fuck!” she screams, her voice breaking. “Daddy—I’m—I’m gonna—oh god, I’m cumming!”

You feel it—the way her body tightens, her ass clenching impossibly around you as she lets out a scream so loud and raw it sends shivers down your spine. Her whole body trembles violently, her knees giving out as she collapses onto the bed, her moans turning into soft, breathless sobs.

“Good girl,” you murmur, your voice rough and full of pride. You slow your movements, savoring the way her body spasms around you, milking every last ounce of pleasure from her. “That’s my good fucking girl. You came so hard, didn’t you?”

Rei whimpers, her face buried in the sheets, too wrecked to form words. Ning moves closer, a wicked smile playing on her lips as she kneels beside her, reaching down to spread Rei’s ass cheeks. “Look at this,” Ning purrs, her tone dripping with admiration. “You destroyed her, babe. Her hole’s all red and swollen, and she’s still twitching from it. God, Rei, you’re so fucking hot like this.”

Rei lets out a soft whine, her exhausted body melting into the mattress as Ning leans down, her lips brushing Rei’s trembling shoulder. “You’re so perfect,” Ning whispers, her voice gentle but full of desire. She presses a kiss to Rei’s neck, then her cheek, before capturing her lips in a deep, hungry kiss. Their mouths move together, soft and slow at first, before Ning’s tongue slips inside, claiming Rei in a way that’s both comforting and carnal.

Rei moans weakly into the kiss, her body still trembling as Ning pulls back, her lips shiny and swollen. “You did so well, baby,” Ning murmurs, brushing Rei’s hair back from her damp face. “But now it’s my turn.”

Ning flashes you a wicked grin as she slides off the bed, helping Rei move to the side. Rei watches, her breathing still ragged, as Ning crawls onto the mattress, positioning herself on all fours. Her bare ass sways enticingly as she looks over her shoulder at you, her eyes dark with lust.

“Come on, babe,” she purrs, spreading her knees wider to give you a perfect view of her dripping pussy. “Rei got her turn. Now it’s mine. Fuck me like the filthy slut I am.”

Ning’s ass sways temptingly, her smooth skin practically glowing under the soft light. You can’t resist the way she presents herself, so eager and proud, her legs spread wide, her hips tilted just right. Your hand comes down on her ass with a loud, sharp slap, the sound ringing through the room as her flesh jiggles under the impact.

“Fuck!” Ning gasps, her back arching deeper as she throws a playful smirk over her shoulder. “God, I missed that.”

You run your hand over the reddened spot, squeezing her cheek roughly. “And I missed fucking this perfect little ass,” you growl, your voice thick with anticipation. “It’s been too fucking long, Ning. I’ve been dying to wreck you again.”

She grins, her tongue darting out to wet her lips. “Then stop teasing and do it already,” she purrs, wiggling her hips. “You know how much I love the way you stretch me open. Make me feel it.”

You lean down, spitting directly onto her tight hole, the warm saliva glistening as it slides over her skin. She shivers at the sensation, a low, needy moan spilling from her lips. Your fingers spread the slick wetness over her entrance, circling it teasingly, pressing just enough to make her squirm beneath your touch, her hips wriggling in desperate anticipation.

“God, you’re still so fucking tight,” you mutter, pressing the tip of your cock against her hole. Ning pushes back against you, her body relaxed, welcoming. “Even after all the times I’ve fucked you, your ass feels like it’s trying to swallow me whole.”

“That’s because it’s yours,” she shoots back, her voice breathy but bold. “This ass was made for you, babe. So quit talking and fill me already.”

You chuckle darkly, gripping her hips as you push forward. The head of your cock breaches her, her tight heat wrapping around you like a vice. Ning hisses, her fingers gripping the sheets as she adjusts to the intrusion, but there’s no hesitation in her body—only want.

“Fuck, Ning,” you groan as you slide deeper, inch by inch. “You’re still so fucking tight. But you take it so well. Look at this ass, swallowing me like it’s hungry for it.”

“God, yes,” Ning moans, her voice trembling with need. “I love it—I love how you fill me, how deep you get. Keep going, babe. Give me all of it.”

You sink in fully, her ass clenching around you as if refusing to let you go. She lets out a guttural moan, her body shuddering as she pushes back against you, taking you to the hilt. “That’s it,” you growl, your hands spreading her cheeks to watch how perfectly her body grips you. “Good fucking girl. You’re taking me so deep already.”

“Fuck, daddy,” Ning gasps, her voice dripping with lust. “You’re so big—I can feel every inch. Don’t stop. Please don’t fucking stop.”

You pull back slowly, almost all the way out, before slamming back in, earning a sharp cry from her lips. Her body trembles under your grip, but she doesn’t falter. She pushes back to meet you, her ass bouncing beautifully with every thrust.

“Goddamn,” you mutter, picking up your pace, the sound of your hips meeting her echoing through the room. “I could fuck this ass every day and never get tired of it. You feel so fucking good, Ning.”

“Do it,” she moans, her voice high and desperate. “Use me. Fuck me like the dirty slut I am. I want it—I need it.”

Your thrusts grow harder, faster, the slick heat of her body making it impossible to hold back. “You love this, don’t you?” you growl, spanking her ass again. “You love being fucked like this, having your ass stretched open just for me.”

“Yes, yes, yes!” Ning cries, her voice cracking as her body rocks under your assault. “I fucking love it! God, you fuck me so good. I want more—I need more!”

You grip her hips tighter, driving into her with abandon now, her cries spurring you on. “That’s my girl,” you snarl, watching the way her body takes you so perfectly. “You take everything I give you. You’re so fucking good for me, Ning.”

“Fuck, babe,” Ning pants, her voice breathless but full of bliss. “You’re gonna ruin me. But I fucking love it. Keep going—don’t stop. I want you to wreck me.”

Your rhythm quickens, every thrust deep and punishing, sending shockwaves through Ning’s body. Her cries grow louder with each snap of your hips, a mix of guttural moans and filthy encouragement that drives you to go even harder. Her ass swallows you completely, the tight heat pulling you in, her body taking every inch like it’s exactly what she was made for.

“Fuck, Ning,” you growl, your fingers digging into her hips as you hammer into her. “You’re so goddamn tight. How do you still feel like this after everything? Like your ass is squeezing me on purpose.”

Ning glances back at you, her face flushed, her lips curled into a cocky grin despite the way her body trembles. “Because I love it,” she pants, her voice thick with lust. “I love the way you stretch me. I love the way you fuck me like you’re trying to break me. Give me more, babe. Don’t hold back.”

Her words ignite something feral in you, and you grip her even harder, slamming into her with a force that makes her gasp, her hands clutching at the sheets to keep herself steady. The sound of skin meeting skin fills the room, mingling with her cries and the wet, obscene slickness of her taking you so easily.

Out of the corner of your eye, you catch Rei sitting up on the bed, her wide eyes glued to the scene unfolding in front of her. Her cheeks are still flushed from her own wrecking, her lips parted as she watches Ning being fucked mercilessly, her small hands fidgeting with the sheets.

“Enjoying the show, baby?” you ask, your voice rough, teasing, as you deliver a sharp slap to Ning’s ass. The smack echoes, her cheek bouncing under your palm, drawing a loud moan from her lips.

Rei blinks, her breath hitching as she meets your gaze. “I—I didn’t know she could take it like that,” she murmurs, her voice soft but tinged with awe. “She’s... she’s amazing.”

“Damn right I am,” Ning gasps, throwing a glance over her shoulder. Her grin is wild, her eyes blazing as she moans, “You better be taking notes, Rei. This is how a good slut takes it. Isn’t that right, babe?”

You smirk, delivering another sharp thrust that makes Ning cry out, her ass clenching around you. “She’s not wrong,” you say, your voice thick with pride. “Ning’s a fucking champ. Always has been. Look at her, Rei. She’s taking my cock so deep, begging for more, like the filthy little whore she is.”

Rei’s cheeks darken, her thighs pressing together as she squirms, clearly affected by the raw intensity of your words. Ning notices, her grin widening as she throws another taunt her way. “You like watching, don’t you, Rei? You like seeing how he wrecks me? Bet it’s making you wet again already.”

Rei stammers, her eyes darting down, but she doesn’t deny it. Ning laughs breathlessly, her body rocking forward with every thrust, her cries growing higher, more desperate. “God, babe,” she moans, her fingers clutching at the sheets as she pushes back against you. “Harder. I want to feel you fucking destroy me.”

Your grip tightens on her hips, your pace turning brutal, each thrust making her ass ripple, her moans breaking into incoherent cries. “You want me to ruin you, Ning?” you snarl, your voice rough as your cock drives deeper. “You want me to fuck this tight ass so hard you feel it for days?”

“Yes!” she screams, her head dropping forward as her body shakes under the force. “Fuck me harder, daddy! Wreck me—make me yours!”

Rei’s small gasp catches your ear, her wide eyes watching every moment, every movement of your hips, the way Ning’s body takes you without hesitation. “You see this, Rei?” you say, your voice commanding even as your thrusts grow frantic. “This is what it looks like to give everything to me. To let me take you however I want.”

Rei nods weakly, her breath coming in shallow pants, her hands gripping the sheets tightly as her gaze stays locked on the two of you. Ning moans louder, her body arching as she cries out, “Yes, yes, yes! Fuck—don’t stop! I need it, babe—I need you to fucking ruin me!”

Your cock drives into Ning’s ass with deliberate, deep thrusts now, your pace slowing but losing none of its intensity. Each stroke makes her moan loudly, her body quaking as she takes every inch of you like she was made for it. The way her ass grips you so tightly, the soft, wet sounds filling the room, it’s all enough to make your head spin.

But then your eyes catch Rei. She’s sitting on her knees, her thighs pressed tightly together, her lips parted as she watches with wide, hungry eyes. She looks like she’s trying to stay still, but her body betrays her—the small, involuntary shifts of her hips, the way her hands clutch at the sheets. She’s boiling with lust, practically trembling with it, and it’s clear she wants more.

You smirk, slowing your thrusts just enough to tease Ning, who whines in protest, trying to push back against you. “Hold on, Ning,” you say, your voice low and commanding. “I think Rei wants to join the fun. Don’t you, baby?”

Rei blinks, her cheeks flushing as she stammers, “I—I…”

“Get on all fours,” you order, cutting her off. Your tone leaves no room for argument, and Rei obeys immediately, crawling onto the bed until she’s beside Ning. She looks up at you with those big, innocent eyes, but there’s nothing innocent about the way her body shivers with anticipation.

“That’s my good girl,” you murmur, running a hand down her back as she settles into position. “Now stay still. Let me take care of both of you.”

You pull out of Ning’s tight ass with a groan, her body clinging to you as if it doesn’t want to let go. Your cock throbs, slick and dripping with saliva and her arousal, as you turn to Rei. She’s trembling on all fours beside Ning, her eyes full of desperation, her pussy glistening with need.

“Your turn, baby,” you say, your voice low and commanding, as you guide the head of your cock to her soaked folds. You tease her entrance, rubbing the tip against her slit, drawing a shaky gasp from her lips. “You want this, don’t you? You’ve been sitting there, watching, dripping for me.”

“Yes, daddy,” Rei moans, her voice trembling with need. “I want it so bad. Please, fuck me. Fill me up.”

You push into her slowly, savoring the way her pussy stretches around you, impossibly tight and hot, like her body was made for you. Rei cries out, her back arching as you sink in deeper, inch by inch, until you’re buried to the hilt. Her walls clench around you, pulsing, drawing you in further.

“Fuck, Rei,” you groan, gripping her hips as you give her a deliberate thrust that makes her whimper. “You’re so fucking tight. You feel incredible, baby.”

Rei’s voice breaks as she moans, her fingers clutching the sheets. “Oh god, daddy. You’re so big—I can feel every inch. Please, don’t stop.”

Behind you, Ning lets out a breathless laugh, shifting to press her chest against the mattress, her ass raised high in the air. “Don’t forget about me, babe,” she purrs, wiggling her hips. “I’m not done with you yet.”

You smirk, pulling out of Rei with a wet, obscene sound that makes her whimper. “Don’t worry,” you say, sliding back into Ning’s ass in one smooth thrust. “I’m not leaving either of you wanting.”

Ning gasps loudly, her back arching as her body clamps around you. “Fuck, yes!” she moans, pushing back against you. “That’s it, babe. I’ve missed this—missed you wrecking me like this.”

Your rhythm builds, switching between them, your cock plunging deep into Rei’s tight, wet pussy before sliding back into Ning’s ass. Their cries blend together, filling the room with filthy harmony, each thrust earning a moan, a gasp, or a scream as you take them both.

“Look at you two,” you growl, your hands gripping their hips as you alternate between them. “Side by side, letting me use you however I want. You’re both so fucking perfect.”

Rei whimpers, her voice high and breathless. “Daddy, you feel so good,” she cries, her body trembling beneath you. “I love it—I love the way you fuck me.”

“Goddamn, Rei,” Ning breathes, glancing over at her with a wicked grin. “Listen to yourself. You’re such a good little slut for him. Look at you, taking his cock so well.”

You slap Ning’s ass hard, the sound sharp and loud, making her cry out. “You’re both filthy little sluts,” you say, your tone full of pride and possession. “Taking turns on my cock, moaning for me like this. Fuck, you’re perfect.”

Ning’s laughter turns into a moan as you pound into her harder, her ass bouncing under your grip. “Keep going,” she gasps, her voice hoarse but full of need. “Wreck me, babe. Make me feel it. I want to be sore tomorrow.”

You pull out of Ning with a wet pop, slamming back into Rei’s pussy, her body jerking forward with the force. She screams, her nails digging into the sheets as her walls tighten around you. “Daddy,” she sobs, her voice cracking. “I—I’m so close. Please, don’t stop. I need to cum.”

Your grip tightens on her hips as you thrust harder, faster, driving her toward the edge. “Then fucking do it,” you growl, your voice harsh. “Show me how good you are. Cum for me, baby.”

Rei's body trembles beneath you as you pound into her pussy, the sound of wet, slick thrusts mixing with her desperate cries. Her hands clutch at the sheets, her back arching as you drive deeper, your cock stretching her in ways that have her gasping for air. Her moans are high-pitched, frantic, every sound dripping with need.

"Daddy!" she wails, her voice breaking as her thighs start to shake. "I—I'm gonna cum! Please, don't stop! I can't hold it—I'm so close!"

You grip her hips tighter, your thrusts growing rougher, faster, as you chase her over the edge. "Do it," you growl, slamming into her harder. "Cum for me, Rei. Show me what a good little slut you are."

Her scream tears through the room, raw and guttural as her orgasm slams into her. Her pussy clenches around your cock, a vice of molten heat, her body shaking violently as wave after wave of pleasure crashes through her. She sobs into the sheets, her nails digging into the fabric as her juices coat your cock, dripping down her thighs.

"Fuck," you mutter, watching her fall apart. "You're so goddamn perfect, baby. Look at you, cumming so hard on my cock. You love it, don't you?"

"Yes, daddy!" she cries, her voice trembling. "I love it—I love how you make me feel!"

As Rei collapses forward, her body spent and trembling, you pull out and immediately turn your attention to Ning. Her ass is still raised, swaying slightly, her cheeks red and marked from your earlier slaps. She glances back at you, her grin wicked despite the way her body trembles with anticipation.

"Come on, babe," she purrs, wiggling her hips. "Wreck me. I want to feel it—I need it."

You waste no time, sliding back into her tight ass with a deep, brutal thrust that has her crying out. Ning pushes back against you, her body greedy, taking every inch as you pick up a relentless pace. Her moans are filthy, each one sharper and louder than the last as you pound into her without mercy.

"Fuck, Ning," you growl, gripping her hips hard enough to leave marks. "Your ass feels so fucking good. It's like it's begging me to destroy you."

"Yes!" she screams, her voice hoarse but full of desperate need. "Destroy me, babe. Make me cum—please, I need it so bad!"

You spank her hard, the sharp slap making her whole body jolt as her ass ripples under your palm. She screams again, her cries turning into sobs of pure pleasure as you slam into her harder, deeper. "You're such a filthy little slut," you snarl, your cock driving into her over and over. "You love this, don’t you? Love being fucked like you’re nothing but a toy for me."

"God, yes!" Ning moans, her voice breaking. "I'm your slut, babe! Do whatever you want—just don't stop!"

Her body tightens suddenly, her back arching as her moans become frantic, incoherent. She grips the sheets, her knuckles white as her orgasm tears through her. Her ass clenches around you, spasming as she cries out, her voice raw and shaking. "Fuck! I'm cumming—oh god, I'm cumming so hard!"

You watch her fall apart, her body trembling violently, every muscle in her taut with the force of her climax. Her cries are ragged, broken, her face pressed into the sheets as her orgasm leaves her a shaking, breathless mess.

"That's it," you mutter, slowing your thrusts to savor the way her body milks you, still so tight and hot. "You look so fucking good like this, Ning. Completely ruined."

She collapses beside Rei, her body spent, her breaths coming in shallow gasps as she glances back at you with a weak but satisfied smirk. "You’re fucking incredible," she murmurs, her voice hoarse but dripping with satisfaction.

Your words are sharp, cutting through the heavy, lust-drenched air. "On your knees," you command, your voice low and authoritative. Ning and Rei, their bodies still trembling and spent, slowly rise from the bed, obediently sliding down to the floor. They kneel before you, side by side, their flushed faces tilted up, their eyes wide and eager.

"Good girls," you murmur, stroking your cock lazily as they watch, their gazes locked on you like they’re waiting for your next move. The sight of them—bare, disheveled, and completely at your mercy—sends a thrill straight to your core.

You step closer, gripping your cock as you tap it against Ning’s cheek, the wet head leaving a glistening streak on her skin. She smirks, her tongue darting out to taste it, her eyes dark with hunger. "You missed this, didn’t you?" you growl, shifting to Rei, letting the heavy length rest against her soft, flushed cheek.

Rei’s breath hitches, her eyes flicking up to yours as she whispers, "Yes, daddy." Her voice is soft but laced with desire, her cheeks burning as you slide the tip across her lips, teasing her.

"You’re so fucking cute, Rei," you say, your tone teasing as you tap her cheek lightly with your cock. "These cheeks were made to be marked by me. Look at you—so innocent, but so fucking filthy."

Rei whimpers softly, leaning into the touch, her lips parting slightly as her tongue flicks out to taste you. She’s hesitant but eager, her wide eyes looking up at you, waiting for permission.

"Not yet," you say, pulling back just enough to make her whine. "I’m not done teasing you."

You switch to Ning, slapping your cock lightly against her lips. "And you," you growl, your voice rough. "Always so greedy. Always ready to take everything I give you."

Ning chuckles, her grin sharp as her tongue swirls around the tip, wet and teasing. "You know I love it," she purrs, her voice thick with arousal. "But don’t make me wait too long, babe. I want your cum."

You let your cock trail back and forth between them, grazing their lips, their cheeks, their tongues as they take turns tasting you, their moans soft and needy. Rei leans forward, her adorable face full of desperation as she presses her lips to the tip, her tongue flicking out to lap at the bead of pre-cum there.

"Please, daddy," she whispers, her voice trembling. "Let me suck you. I want to make you feel good."

Ning joins in, her hand reaching up to wrap around your shaft as she plants a wet kiss on the side. "She’s right," she murmurs, her lips brushing against you. "We’ll make you feel so good. Just let us take care of you."

You smirk, finally giving in as you nod. "Go ahead, then," you say, your voice low and commanding. "Show me what you can do."

The two of them waste no time, their mouths meeting at the head of your cock as their tongues swirl together, wet and eager. Ning takes you deeper first, her lips sliding down your shaft as Rei licks and kisses at the base, her small hands cupping your balls gently.

"Fuck," you mutter, your hand tangling in Rei’s hair as you guide her closer. "You two look so fucking good down there. Keep going—don’t stop."

Ning pulls back with an obscene pop, passing your cock to Rei, who takes you into her mouth slowly, her eyes closing as she savors the weight of you on her tongue. Her cheeks hollow as she sucks gently, her moans vibrating against your shaft as Ning licks along the side, her tongue tracing every vein.

"That’s it," you groan, your hips twitching as you watch them. "Good girls. Suck me just like that. Make me want to fill those pretty little mouths of yours."

Ning and Rei are relentless, their mouths working together in perfect, filthy harmony as they lavish attention on your cock. Their tongues slide along your shaft, wet and sloppy, as they take turns sucking you deep, their soft moans sending vibrations through your body. The obscene sounds of their lips smacking and their spit dripping fill the room, mixing with their desperate pleas.

"Please, daddy," Rei whimpers, pulling back just enough to let her swollen lips brush against the tip of your cock. Her wide, innocent eyes look up at you, glistening with desperation. "I want your cum. I need it. Please—please give it to me."

"God, babe," Ning pants, licking up the side of your cock before taking you back into her mouth, her cheeks hollowing as she sucks hard. She pulls off with an audible pop, her hand stroking you as she grins up at you wickedly. "Don’t make us wait. We’re being so good for you. Just let us have it."

"Keep begging," you command, your voice rough with arousal as you grip the base of your cock, guiding it back to Rei’s soft lips. "I want to hear how much you need it."

Rei whines softly, her small hands wrapping around your thighs as she leans in, pressing a kiss to the sensitive head. "I need it so bad, daddy," she whispers, her voice trembling. "Please… please cum for us. I’ll do anything."

"Yes, babe," Ning adds, her tone full of heat as her tongue flicks over your balls, her hand sliding up and down your spit-slick shaft. "We’re ready for it. Just look at us. We’re your good little sluts, and we want you to cover us in it."

Their desperate pleas send a surge of heat straight through you, and you feel the tension building, your body on the brink. You pull back slightly, your hand wrapping firmly around your cock as you start jerking off, stroking yourself in quick, rough movements.

The sight of them drives you insane—their beautiful faces tilted up toward you, their cheeks flushed, their lips wet and swollen from sucking you. Their eyes stay locked on your cock, watching every stroke as their hands reach out to touch your thighs, their fingers trembling with anticipation.

"Fuck," you groan, your grip tightening as you feel yourself teetering on the edge. "You two look so fucking perfect like this. Beg for it one more time. Show me how much you want it."

"Please, daddy!" Rei cries, her voice high and needy, her hands clasped together like she’s praying for your release. "I want your cum all over me. I need to feel it—please, please give it to me!"

"Cover us, babe," Ning moans, licking her lips as she inches closer, her face right next to Rei’s. "We’re yours. Mark us. Show us how much you love it when we’re good for you."

Their words push you over the edge, and with a guttural groan, you explode. Thick, hot ropes of cum spurt out, splashing across their eager faces, painting their cheeks, their lips, their foreheads. Rei gasps softly as a glob lands on her tongue, and Ning moans, her eyes fluttering shut as she tilts her face up, letting it drip down her skin.

"Fuck," you mutter, your body trembling as you milk every last drop onto them, the sight of their cum-splattered faces enough to send another jolt of heat through you. "You look so fucking good like this. Covered in my cum. My good fucking girls."

They stay still, their breaths shallow, their hands rising to touch their faces, smearing the warm, sticky mess across their cheeks. "Clean me up," you order, holding your cock out toward them. "Suck the rest off. Don’t waste a drop."

Rei moves first, her tongue darting out to swirl around the sensitive head, her lips closing softly as she sucks, her moans sending shivers through you. Ning joins her, licking along the shaft, her tongue brushing against Rei’s as they work together to clean you, their mouths wet and eager.

"Fuck, that feels so good," you groan, your hips twitching as they take turns, their lips pressing kisses to your still-throbbing cock.

Once they’re satisfied, they lean back, their fingers trailing over their cum-covered faces. Ning dips a finger into a thick glob on her cheek, bringing it to her lips with a grin. "So warm," she murmurs, her voice playful. "And so much."

Rei watches her, then mimics the gesture, her cheeks flushing as she licks her fingers clean. "It’s… it’s kind of sweet," she whispers shyly, glancing at you.

Ning smirks, leaning closer to Rei, her voice low and teasing. "Let’s see how it tastes on you."

She presses her lips to Rei’s, her tongue slipping inside, and Rei gasps softly before melting into the kiss. Their mouths move together, wet and sloppy, as they share the taste of you, their moans soft and full of heat. When they finally pull apart, their eyes meet yours, their faces still streaked with your release, and they smile, utterly wrecked and satisfied.

An idea hits you, sharp and wicked. You glance down at them, their gorgeous faces still painted with your cum, and the two Santa hats lying forgotten on the floor catch your eye. A slow grin spreads across your face.

“Stay just like that,” you say, your voice low and full of intent. “Don’t move.”

Rei and Ning look up at you, curiosity flickering in their lust-heavy gazes. You bend down, grabbing the Santa hats and brushing off any stray lint before holding them out.

“Here,” you murmur, smirking as they take them. “Put these back on. I want to record this—remember it.”

Rei’s cheeks flush, but she doesn’t hesitate. She grabs the hat with trembling fingers, sliding it onto her head, her messy hair spilling out from underneath. Ning snickers softly, more than eager as she adjusts hers, tilting it at a playful angle.

“You’re serious?” Ning asks, her lips curling into a devilish grin.

“Dead serious,” you reply, already picking up the phone on the nightstand. “You two look fucking perfect—adorable and filthy all at once. I’m not letting this moment slip away.”

They exchange a glance, Rei biting her lip nervously, while Ning just shrugs, her smirk widening.

“Alright,” Ning says, leaning forward slightly, tilting her chin up as if presenting herself. “Make it a good one, babe.”

Rei nods shyly, her hands clasped together in her lap, her wide eyes shimmering with that innocent-but-not-so-innocent look that drives you crazy. “Do you… want us to smile?”

“Damn right I do,” you say, holding up your phone. “Big, pretty smiles, ladies. Let me see those faces.”

They obey instantly, their lips curling into sweet, innocent smiles that contrast so perfectly with the cum streaked across their cheeks and lips. The Santa hats perched jauntily on their heads only add to the surreal, filthy beauty of the moment.

“Holy fuck,” you mutter, snapping photo after photo. “You two are so fucking hot like this. Perfect little sluts, looking so goddamn adorable and dirty all at once.”

Rei’s smile falters slightly, her cheeks burning. “D-don’t say that,” she whispers, though the way her thighs press together betrays how much she loves it.

“Why not?” Ning teases, nudging her. “It’s true. Look at us. We’re fucking masterpieces.”

You chuckle darkly, snapping one last shot before lowering your phone. “Alright,” you say, your voice softening just a bit as you grab the wet wipes from the bedside table. “Let’s clean you up now.”

You kneel in front of them, pulling a wipe free and gently cupping Rei’s chin. She looks up at you, her wide eyes trusting as you start wiping the sticky mess from her cheeks.

“You did so good, baby,” you murmur, your voice low and soothing. “Such a good girl for me.”

Her lips part slightly, a soft sigh escaping her as you finish, discarding the wipe before moving to Ning. She tilts her head back, her smirk softening into something almost tender as you carefully clean her face.

“Can’t have you two walking around looking like this,” you joke lightly, tossing the last wipe aside. “Even though I kinda wish I could keep you like this forever.”

Ning chuckles, leaning in to press a quick kiss to your cheek. “You’re such a sap sometimes,” she teases, but her eyes shine with affection.

Rei giggles softly, her fingers brushing over the brim of her hat. “Thank you, daddy,” she whispers, her voice small but full of warmth.

You sit back on the bed, watching Rei shift slightly where she kneels. The way her thighs tremble and how she winces just a little when she moves catches your attention. A smirk tugs at your lips, but there’s genuine care in your tone when you ask, “How’s your ass, baby? Still sore?”

Rei nods shyly, her cheeks flushing as she glances over her shoulder. “It… it still hurts,” she admits softly, her voice trembling. “I can feel the marks from where you spanked me.”

You lean forward, brushing her hair back gently, your fingers trailing down her cheek. “Let me see,” you murmur, guiding her to turn slightly. The marks on her ass are still visible, red and slightly raised from where your hand connected earlier. A pang of pride and guilt mixes in your chest as you trace one with your fingertips, making her shiver.

“Still so beautiful,” you say softly, your voice full of affection. “But don’t worry, baby. I’ll take care of you now. You’ve been such a good girl for me—I’ll make sure you feel better.”

Rei bites her lip, her eyes fluttering closed as she leans into your touch. “Thank you, daddy,” she whispers, her voice so small it makes your chest tighten.

Before you can say anything else, Ning snickers beside her, that sharp grin back on her face. “This is my favorite part,” she says, her voice playful but affectionate. “You fuck us like you’re trying to break us, then turn around and treat us like we’re goddamn princesses. It’s almost unfair how good you are at this.”

You chuckle, shaking your head as you pull both girls closer, making them sit on the bed. “You are my princesses,” you say, wrapping an arm around Ning while your other hand strokes Rei’s back gently. “That’s why I can’t just leave you all wrecked like this. Gotta take care of my girls, don’t I?”

Ning smirks, pressing a quick kiss to your jaw. “Damn right you do,” she says, her tone softer now. “But I guess that’s why we keep coming back for more.”

Rei giggles softly, curling into your chest, her body relaxing as your fingers trace soothing patterns over her back. “I like it when you take care of us,” she murmurs, her voice barely audible.

“And I always will,” you promise, pulling both of them even closer. “Always.”

These two—your Rei, your Ning—together like this, looking up at you with soft smiles and heat still lingering in their eyes, it’s overwhelming. You’ve always loved them, separately, deeply, but seeing them like this, each one by your side, their small hands caressing your body... it seems like a dream too good to be real.

Rei’s cheeks are still red, her lips swollen from the intensity of everything, and she’s the first to speak. “So… what do you think?” she asks softly, her voice trembling just a little.

Ning’s grin is more confident, but there’s a flicker of vulnerability in her dark eyes as she adds, “Yeah, babe. Was this the best Christmas present ever, or what?”

Your hands find theirs instinctively, your fingers lacing with theirs, squeezing tight. “Are you kidding me?” you say, your voice thick. “This… this is everything. I don’t even know how to put it into words. You two… fuck, I love you both so much.”

Rei’s eyes widen, her breath catching, and Ning’s grin softens, a rare sweetness creeping into her expression. “Good answer,” Ning says, leaning in to press a quick kiss to your lips. “We wouldn’t have done this if we didn’t feel the same way, you know.”

Rei nods, her voice small but firm as she says, “We talked about it a lot, and… and we decided we both love you too much to let you go. So… we’re here. Together.”

“Together,” you repeat, your voice quiet but full of awe. You look at them, your chest tightening as the reality sinks in. “For real, right? Like… this isn’t just a one-time thing?”

Ning laughs, her hand coming up to brush some of the sweat-damp hair from your forehead. “Yeah, babe, for real. We’re not going anywhere.”

Rei’s smile is soft, shy, as she squeezes your hand. “We want to make this work. The three of us. If… if you want that too.”

You stare at them for a long moment, your heart pounding. Then you pull them both into your arms, holding them so tightly it’s like you’re afraid they might disappear. “Being completely honest” you murmur against their hair, “this is the best fucking thing that’s ever happened to me. You two together—it’s perfect. You’re perfect.”

Ning chuckles softly, her arms wrapping around your waist as she nuzzles into your neck. “We do go pretty well together, don’t we?” she says, her voice teasing but warm.

Rei giggles, her face buried against your chest. “I think so,” she murmurs.

You pull back just enough to look at them, your hands cupping their faces, your thumbs brushing over their flushed cheeks. “More than perfect,” you say, your voice low but steady. “I don’t even know how I got this lucky, but I’m not letting either of you go. Ever.”

Rei blushes deeper, her smile soft and full of love, while Ning smirks, her confidence back in full force. “Damn right you’re not,” she says, leaning in to kiss you again, this time slower, sweeter.

When she pulls back, Rei surprises you by leaning up to kiss you as well, her lips soft and hesitant but filled with just as much emotion. It’s like something slots into place as the three of you sit there, tangled together, an unusual union, but one that still seems perfectly logical.

“Best Christmas ever,” you murmur, your hands holding theirs tightly.

Ning laughs, her head resting on your shoulder as she says, “You better believe it, babe. And this is just the beginning.”

Rei nods, her smile growing as she leans into your other side. “Merry Christmas, daddy.”

You chuckle, pulling them closer as your heart swells with a love so deep, it feels like it might burst. “Merry Christmas, my girls.”

[yinyuedijun]

HI CARROT (may I call you carrot?), thank you so much for the very kind feedback on this fic 🥺💗 I am so very glad that we exist in the same timeline where you decided to give this very silly piece a chance!!!

thank you for taking the time to write out your thoughts in such detail!!!! I can't help but respond to some of your observations, in particular the comments around hypersexuality and sex work. hypersexuality is a topic that is heavily nuanced imo. though it can of course be an uncomplicated behaviour for a lot of people (and it is usually depicted as such in fanfic - which imo is totally fine!), It is irl also a behaviour that is often coupled with self-esteem and safety issues irl and can actually be a pretty severe trauma response. I was trying to get at those aspects of hypersexuality within this narrative and I'm very glad that your interpretation of this fic kinda matches that!

SIMILARLY I do think sex work is equally complicated. despite the glamorous representations in fiction (and sometimes reality), I absolutely agree that it is often just a means to an end. BUT I still wrote this with the knowledge that the industry is often entangled with trafficking and exploitation and psychological stress. I wanted the reader to basically be somewhere in the middle of all that context - she has been exploited but she is also a hustler within her own right nowadays (as much as suo allows her to be lol) and I'm very happy that at least some of my efforts were apparent here. I'm especially glad to hear that you felt it was thoughtful representation even from your pov as someone who's researched and worked a lot in the field!!!! I've never studied any of this formally (I'm just going off informal research and limited personal experience) so I super appreciate your feedback!

ALSO. your point about the asian parenting floored me because I didn't write this couple with that dynamic in mind, BUT I too am asian and was raised with pretty traditionally minded parents. i totally agree with the parallels you are drawing here and can't help but wonder if that was some of my personal experience and ideas of love coming thru in the fic lol... thematically it also makes sense because suo and mc had tenuous parental figures (they lost the best one they had) and really did have to start parenting each other after their master's death. so even if it was not a conscious decision to write tiger parenting... I do think you are speaking facts here LOLOL

If I could, I'd respond to all your other super thoughtful observations (THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THEM ), but I fear I will bore you with all the yapping. so I will just reiterate that I endlessly appreciate your comments and can't thank you enough for them. I will definitely be returning to them on rainy days when I feel like quitting writing haha. thank you for being so encouraging!!!

SENDING U LOVE !!!!!

TOKYO VICE | part 2

“Do you remember,” Suo begins, voice light, “how our master always talked about how important it is to engage with each other’s feelings?” You tense. “No,” you blurt out, and Suo laughs. “Of course not,” he plays along. “You were always so terrible at it. But I've been doing a bad job too, lately. So”—he reaches beneath your dress, hooks your thong with his fingers and starts pulling the fabric down your sticky thighs—“I wanted to have an honest conversation with you.” (Or: Tired of your lies and self-deception, Suo takes matters into his own hands and forces the truth out of you.)

12.8k words. suo x fem reader. deeply unserious yakuza au ft. yandere suo. mostly unrepentant smut, comedy, angst. warnings: sex work. nsft tags: afab reader, emotional sex, fingering, dacryphilia, orgasm denial, pussyjob, just the tip, creampie. suo is mean and makes you cry but there's no degradation, he's just a bastard lol. he also manhandles you a lot and you sit in his lap. dividers by @/cafekitsune!

part 1 here

You're surprised at Suo’s indifference to your sex life.

A month has gone by, and he’s made no comment on your habit of sleeping with customers, nor on the hours during which you come home—which are now even later than usual, since you have express permission to sleep with people and have no need to rush back to the penthouse after your ‘appointments’. And it isn't as if he's ignoring the reality of your late nights either. In a stunning show of respect for your personal freedom, he now actively offers to arrange for someone to pick you up from whichever love hotel you'll end up at. (You always decline, of course—if you're going to pretend to be his wife, you'd rather pretend to be a faithful one.)

Ironically, you had initially thought that Suo’s approval wouldn't matter either way. You had found the sex with your clients to be so uninspiring that it made you miss celibacy, so you were planning on stopping. But it turned out that you were deeply affected by the experience of sitting in Suo’s lap as he talked about his expectation of deciding whose cocks you should be allowed to take. It did something horrible to your sex drive, and thus you turned to work as your only outlet.

You spent around three weeks desperately trying to find a customer to satisfy your urges—or at the very least, to fuck you in a way that could get you to stop thinking of Suo whenever you got even a little horny. You were faced with utter failure in this pursuit, and in the end, bleakly resigned yourself to the reality that your shameful attraction to your best friend is incurable. You’ve now given up on the love hotel visits and simply take care of your needs with a vibrator instead. At least this way, you can actually say Suo’s name while you cum, rather than constantly reminding yourself to say your customer’s name instead.

The freedom of letting yourself fantasise about Suo has been exhilarating, but terrible for your friendship. It’s just difficult to sit across from him at breakfast and act like you haven't touched yourself at the table while he was gone, fantasising about what it would be like if he bent you over it and fucked you dumb. But you are a decent actor—hostessing demands that of you—so you don't think Suo has caught onto your carnal desires for him. Hopefully, he never will.

Another couple of weeks pass like this. Things are so calm that you come to believe that Suo is genuinely fine with you having some degree of sexual freedom, at least at work. This, however, turns out to be nothing short of naïvete.

After all, Suo is never forceful when he's upset with your decisions—but he also never fails to redirect them.

One spring evening, you show up at the kyabakura and are told that you’re only to see one customer tonight, and that it will be a private session.

“But we don't do private sessions here,” you say, blissfully unaware of your imminent suffering, “and we don't even have private rooms at this establishment.”

To this, your mamasan responds that the club is making an exception for this one guest, and that this guest has rented out the rooftop bar just to see you. When you ask just who this person might be, a look of mild panic flashes through her eyes. She grabs you by the shoulders and tells you to be careful. Just keep him happy and go home after, okay? she says. Don't go out for drinks, and definitely don't go to any love hotels. Don’t tell him your real name at any cost. You don't want to involve yourself with a man like him.

A sense of dread fills you as you step into the elevator.

A cool breeze greets you when you step onto the rooftop patio. Normally bustling with a raucous crowd, it almost feels eerie in its emptiness. Aside from the glow of the red light district beneath you and the city skyline in the distance, the only light is coming from the candles lighting one of the booths.

Your anxiety intensifies as you approach it.

You aren't very surprised at the sight of Suo lounging on a leather couch, dressed in full criminal regalia—infamous eyepatch, tassel earrings, and all. Sakura once mentioned that this club is connected to some colour gang, so you figure that the manager likely recognized Gui Yanzhao on sight. He probably suffered a minor angina when he did. The mamasan herself has no criminal ties to your knowledge, but she was probably informed that one of her girls was to entertain a high-profile yakuza, and she was likely worried that you'd been maimed in the process. Gui Yanzhao has a bit of a reputation for being a sadist, after all.

While you appreciate her concern, it is not Suo’s history of violence that scares you, but his history of antagonising you. On good days, there's nothing that delights him more than seeing you flustered or off-kilter. On bad days, there’s nothing that consoles him like spiteful retaliation against whomever's managed to piss him off—and you have, without a doubt, managed to piss him off.

You groan as soon as you see him, fearing the worst for your mental health.

“What are you doing here,” you say, and Suo smiles.

“Oh? You're not happy to see me?”

“No,” you moan. “How are you even here right now? Aren't you worried about being assassinated or something? Who did you terrorise to get an entire rooftop bar to yourself?”

“I have a very cordial relationship with all the major organisations on Keisei Street and was promised immunity during my visit tonight,” Suo says neatly. “And I didn't terrorise anyone. I simply walked into this fine establishment and politely asked for a private space to enjoy with my preferred hostess.”

Neither of you need to mention that the sight of the tassel earrings alone would be enough to terrorise someone. The manager probably felt like he was being extorted just from being on the receiving end of Suo’s smile. Actually, you currently feel like you're being extorted too.

You spend a good few moments giving him a look of open distress, to which he smiles.

“You know,” he says, “for a top-ranking hostess, you're not showing much hospitality right now.”

“Oh, for the love of—”

You force yourself to stop, remembering that you are, in fact, at work. Despite your mixed feelings about your industry, at the end of the day, you pride yourself on your work ethic. You take your job very seriously, and your job right now is to entertain your customer—even if said customer is your fake yakuza husband who is toying with you as a cat would a mouse.

Resigning yourself to a night of probable humiliation (one of Suo's greatest passions in addition to lying for comedy), you walk over to sit yourself next to him. And just like in Red Dragon’s lounge, Suo overturns the decision by pulling you into his lap. Your eyes go wide as he settles you on top of him—because unlike the intimate space of that crime scene, this is expressly forbidden behaviour at your club.

Also, unlike that other night, you are currently wearing the shortest dress imaginable and the tiniest thong you own.

You find yourself shivering as Suo's hand settles on your lower back, which is fully exposed thanks to the cut of your dress. You try not to focus on the calloused press of his fingers against your bare skin, but this is an exceedingly difficult endeavour, as his touch has been featured in your sexual fantasies for the past several weeks. Worse yet—your dress is now riding up your ass, and your thong isn't doing much to cover you. Whatever material his pants are made of—light, delicate—feels incredibly good against your thighs too.

If this continues, you might cum on the spot.

“Wait,” you say, and Suo raises a brow.

“Oh?”

“You aren't supposed to touch the hostesses here.”

He smiles. “I'm sure this place might be able to make an exception for me. But only if you are personally willing to, of course.”

“...”

Making an exception for him, in your current situation, would be among the worst decisions you've ever made. But after two of the most sexually frustrating months of your life, you’re ready to make horrible decisions.

“Fine,” you say. “But you better not cheap out on the drinks. The mamasan will only overlook this if you make it worth our while.”

“Of course,” Suo says. “Though I think she’d overlook a lot of things for me regardless.”

Suo makes good on his promise and orders a great deal of alcohol. All top shelf, of course. He laughs that his goal is to bring you to the number 1 ranking with his patronage alone tonight. It’s a hideous display of wealth.

As you pour him an absurdly expensive drink (a Hibiki 30 year-old blended whiskey), you reminisce on how little money you both used to have as teens. He had to be so careful with his wallet whenever he felt like visiting you—or rather, checking in on you—at work. Especially after your master passed. The two of you were very good about staying financially independent, but there was something comforting about your master’s promise to support you if anything ever happened.

With him gone, you and Suo had only financial paranoia and each other.

You guess that might have affected Suo more than you thought. Perhaps he didn't join the yakuza to spite you, but to support you. Certainly, he seems to enjoy spoiling you right now—treating you to drinks that would easily clear a year of his salary as a teen, buying out an entire night of your time at a high end club, renting out a whole floor just so that he can have you to himself. When you point out that his tab must be getting catastrophic, he only laughs.

“I did always say that I wanted to spend money on you,” he recalls. It had been a running joke during your days at the girls’ bar, when you scolded him for paying 3000¥ per hour just to visit you. You hated that he was wasting money on the red light district; he always replied that it wasn't a waste, because it was money spent to see you.

You feel your stomach flutter at the comment. You didn't think he'd remember words from so long ago. As a teenager, you had a tendency of clinging onto small, inconsequential moments with him because they brought you so much joy. You’ve always assumed he would have forgotten them, writing them off as instances of shallow teasing—but if he remembers, then surely they meant something to him too?

This would all make you feel sentimental if you weren't outrageously horny.

Suo has kept you on his lap the whole evening, even as you pour him drinks. Every movement to serve him has you involuntarily rubbing on his thigh, and you're quite certain at this point that he's been lifting your skirt up inch by inch with every casual touch on your waist. You don't bother accusing him of it, though. He'd just give you an innocent look and say that it was an accident. What a horrible man.

Accident or not though, it doesn't change the fact that your nearly bare cunt is pressed right against him. You keep trying to shift positions to pull down your skirt or lift yourself off him, but each attempt only makes it worse—brings the soft fabric of his pants right against your pussy, or makes your clit drag against his thigh, with only your thong separating your bodies. You try to suppress your arousal, but to your overwhelming horror, you can't seem to control yourself. You feel yourself getting wet, folds quickly becoming slick as you’re forced to grind on him. Your body, already warm from all the cocktails and shots, grows even hotter as you squirm on his lap.

In a desperate move to regain some control, you fully get up to reach for another drink. But then you feel a pair of hands on your waist, and Suo pulls you back onto his leg—this time forcing you to straddle it. You can't help the whimper that leaves you as your dripping cunt is spread and pressed against him, your clit throbbing against his thigh.

You pray that he doesn't notice the noise, so of course he does.

“Hm? Is something wrong?” Suo’s hand drifts over your waist and down to your thigh, where it ghosts over your bare skin. He leans in, and his voice is silky as he speaks into your ear: “You're moving around a lot. Do you need to get up?”

He’s giving you an out. It's quite considerate of him, as staying like this would not be a good decision. But for better or worse, you have a tendency to make bad ones.

“...no, I'm fine.”

“Good,” he says. “Let me know if you’re uncomfortable at all. I'm happy to move if you'd like.”

As if demonstrating, Suo shifts the leg you're sitting on, directly rubbing it against your core. You try not to shudder, feeling yourself get even wetter, clenching around nothing.

Trying to ignore how empty you are, you grasp for other topics of conversation, something to distract you. A little scrambled from the alcohol and catastrophically aroused, you of course land on the one that's been making your sex drive unmanageable.

“Remember a month ago,” you say, “how you talked about choosing who gets to touch me?”

“Yes.” His palm is warm against your thigh. He isn't moving it, so there's plausible deniability, but the amused tone of his voice suggests that he knows what he's doing. “Does that bother you?”

Of course it should bother you. It's a level of control that's appalling even to your anxiously-attached ass. But it’s also making you wetter right now. You try not to cry—from misery or sexual frustration, you're not sure.

“Well, yeah. Come on, Suo—even you should know that's really weird of you.”

“I do,” he says, smiling like he isn't admitting to deranged behaviour. “But how else am I supposed to know you're safe? Or even aside from being safe—if your needs are being met.” His hand runs up and down your thigh before settling at the hem of your dress. “I wouldn't want you to go unsatisfied. Who knows what kind of people you'd seek out if that happened.”

You actively stop yourself from putting your face in your hands. The gall of him saying this after forcing you into extended celibacy is beyond words, especially as you're being forced to rub up on him, effectively ruining every attempt you've made not to think about him sexually for the past several years. There are many materially consequential reasons for your decision to not fuck Suo—you should not be soaked through your panties, your thighs sticky with need, as you sit on his lap.

“That's,” you say lamely, “not very normal of you.” Trying for a less sensual conversation, you go for the reliable topic Sakura’s romance radar: “Also, if satisfaction was your concern, why did you choose Sakura? I love that guy a lot, but he has literally no experience. And I think he'd blue-screen trying to keep a friend with benefits. You know he can't handle a fuckbuddy.”

You are not trying to be mean. What Sakura objectively needs for his first time is someone sweet and emotionally competent and, most importantly, not an absolute freak like you. This is a failure of your character, not his.

You can hear Suo’s smile in his reply: “I don't think you're giving him enough credit.”

“He has the social skills of a feral cat.”

Suo genuinely laughs. “Sure, when he first came to Makochi. But he's much better now. Plus, you have no room to talk. I mean”—his breath sweeps over your ear—“you used to be pretty wild yourself. I've just domesticated you is all… though you've been misbehaving lately.”

His words do something horrible to you. Trying to distract yourself from the mounting sexual tension, you turn to him to give him a biting retort, but you're abruptly stopped by the look in his eye. Distinctly hungry and unrepentant in its desire, his gaze roams openly and shamelessly along the curves of your body.

You feel like you're being eaten alive.

Plenty of customers have looked at you in such a way when you wear this outfit, but none have had this effect on you—which is to say, making you clench immediately.

You try not to cry. You actually will cum on the spot at this rate, and you don't think you could be subtle about it. You're barely keeping it together right now, with how your pussy keeps fluttering and dripping. Coupled with the way that the alcohol is melting the edges of your self-control, you're shocked you haven't at least moaned yet.

In a last ditch effort to save your friendship, as well as your rental (house arrest) situation, you slap a hand over his mouth.

“Stop that.”

Suo laughs. He grabs your wrist, lifts your palm away. “Why?”

Why? Because if you keep talking like that, I'll bend over and start begging you to fuck me! you think. But even in your inebriated, horny state, it feels like a poor idea to admit this aloud. You end up saying, “Hostesses aren't paid to flirt like this. Strictly speaking, we’re paid to be conversational partners.” You frown at him. “You're breaking a lot of club rules right now.”

This reprimand backfires on you, as you are suddenly filled with intrusive thoughts of breaking every single rule in this establishment with Suo, including the ones preventing you from climbing on top of him and riding him raw. You squirm at the thought, wishing you could close your legs rather than making a mess of your underwear (now a lost cause), but Suo’s grip stays firm on your waist.

He, himself, is unbothered by your scolding. “Okay,” he says simply. “Then I won't speak to you as a hostess. I want to speak to you, seriously, as a friend.”

His smile is so disarming, it makes you nervous. But he sounds earnest enough for you to be curious, and anyway, you're desperate for something to distract you from your wet cunt.

“Alright,” you acquiesce, “What do you have to say, as a friend?”

“I just have one question.”

“Sure. Shoot.”

His hand comes to rest in your thigh again. He leans in, breath so hot against your ear that your heart jumps.

“I can accept that you wanted to see customers just to satisfy your urges. But tell me why you didn't come to me first.”

You freeze up. Look at him, wide-eyed.

“Wh-what?”

Suo just smiles. Looks so fucking innocent you wonder if you misheard, but his voice is sharp when he replies: “Let me put it another way. Why have we never slept together?”

For some reason, you’ve never thought that he'd ask you this question point blank, even though you've asked it to yourself many times. It takes you several moments to piece together a response, during which Suo’s expression turns distinctly wicked. A sign that he smells blood.

“Why would you think we would have?” you ask carefully.

“Because we’ve both clearly thought about it. You especially.”

You try to keep a straight face. “No I haven't. I don't know what you're talking about.” You raise a brow. “How would you even know?”

“Because,” he says, hand inching up your thigh, “you’re so wet that I can feel it.”

You're mortified.

Shame floods your body, first because of the accusation, and then because you know it's true. You were tipsy enough not to think about this, but now—sobering up from sheer panic— you're acutely aware of how you've soaked through the fabric beneath you. Something that Suo had certainly known, and chose to encourage.

What a horrible man.

When you don't reply, he tilts his head. “Don't tell me you haven't noticed. Do you want me to show you?”

His hand is moving so slowly, you know he's giving you another out. You could easily get off his lap. You could even slap him and call him a sleazy drunk and grouse at him to go home. You could forgive him in the morning for coming onto you and say he'd obviously made an inebriated mistake, as opposed to a very calculated decision. Your friendship would stay mostly intact. His grip on you might tighten, but that would be fine. You would still get to stay with him.

And that's all you've ever wanted. Just to stay with him.

But you're so wet, so empty, so aching. You want to be touched. You want to be touched by Suo, and only by Suo. You want to be fucked by him, to be owned by him, to be ruined by him. You’ve wanted it so badly and so long that you can't even remember when it started—only that you want it to end.

So instead of moving away, you sit there and endure the humiliation of getting your cunt inspected by him.

Suo hums as he opens your legs. You suppress a whimper as a finger moves along your folds, at the noise it makes as it runs through your slick. “Look, you’re so wet,” he murmurs into your ear. He finds your clit—swollen, neglected, and you whimper as he starts to draw slow, lazy circles around it. “Poor thing.”

“It’s only because you had me grinding on you the whole night,” you say through gritted teeth. “It doesn't—ngh—doesn’t mean I’ve been wanting to fuck you.”

You sound pissed enough that you'd convince anyone else, but you know, even without seeing his face, that Suo can tell you're bullshitting.

“You’re not a good liar,” he remarks. A fine teacher even when humiliating people, Suo can't help but add, “If you have to tell a lie, at least come up with a believable one.”

“What makes it unbelievable?” you reply, words clipped off by a sharp inhale as he starts rubbing your pussy.

“Well,” he starts nonchalantly, as if he isn't toying with your cunt, “after you were targeted in that succession conflict, I put hidden cameras in the area, and also in our suite.”

Your eyes go wide. Even in your aroused state, the implications are making you panic. “You—you what?”

“It was for security purposes,” he dismisses casually, as if he's not admitting to a serious invasion of privacy. “Only near the front door and the common areas. I just wanted to catch intruders and any suspicious behaviour from my men. But imagine my surprise”—you feel his fingers start to press into your cunt—“when I instead caught you fucking yourself on the couch and moaning my name.”

You’re mortified. Humiliated. Mind racing with every instance you were horny and stupid enough to touch yourself in a common space. You think about yelling at him about the cameras, but then you feel two fingers sinking into you, and now you aren't thinking about much at all.

Your mind goes blank as you're stretched open by him. Your cunt is so wet, so empty, but the feeling still makes you whine. Your brow furrows, and you give him a pleading look. Slowly, please.

“Don't worry,” he says in a soothing tone, “I know you can handle this. I've seen you take much bigger. Though”—he shifts, pulls you so you're in between his legs, and now you can feel the length of him against you, hard and aching and huge, what the fuck—“maybe not big enough.”

You tighten around his fingers as he grinds against you. You want him inside you so badly, it hurts. Suo laughs when he feels your desperation, and he sounds so amused that you can't help but feel ashamed. But even more than shame, you feel aroused. You take the rest of his fingers easily, down to the knuckle.

“What the fuck, Suo,” you eventually manage through your panting, though not with much bite. “You weren't—ahh—meant to see any of that.”

“Sorry,” he says, sounding deeply unapologetic. “If it makes you feel any better, I didn't watch much, and I deleted all of it. I didn't need to see that to know you have feelings for me.”

You tense. “What feelings?” you ask, and Suo stops. He pulls his fingers out of you—you breathe sharply at the loss—and manhandles you until you're straddling his lap. Forces you to look at him, into his one eye. It's knife-sharp, brutal, but familiar. You don't struggle, nor do you feel uneasy.

But you do feel like prey.

“Do you remember,” he begins, voice light, “how our master always talked about how important it is to engage with each other’s feelings?”

Fuck.

“No,” you blurt out, and Suo laughs.

“Of course not,” he plays along. “You were always so terrible at it. But I've been doing a bad job too, lately. So”—he reaches beneath your dress, hooks your thong with his fingers—“I wanted to have an honest conversation with you.”

He smiles at you. Actually looks kind and even sounds earnest. What a fucking sociopath. You allow him to slide your underwear down your legs, kicking them off. Now your pussy is completely bare to him, and you can hear the way his breath stops as he touches it again. Three of his fingers push in this time, and you pant openly at the stretch, leaning against him as your body trembles from the stretch. He flexes his fingers experimentally, watching your reactions—your whimpers, your sighs, the way your eyelashes flutter when he brushes that one spot inside you.

“I’ve always had feelings for you,” he starts, using that nonchalant, delicate tone—the specific one that suggests danger, “and I know you’re too smart to have missed that. I’d be fine with it if you didn't return them, but you do.”

“I don't,” you protest, and then his fingers curl and press into your g-spot. You're cut off immediately, gasping at the sudden wave of heat in your belly.

A hand comes up to your chin. He forces you to look at him. “I said I wanted to have an honest conversation, remember.”

“I–I am being honest, I—” Your voice breaks as he starts pumping his fingers. It's slow, gentle, but precise. Tension builds in you at an alarming rate, your thighs getting as slick and messy as his hand. You bury your face into the crook of his shoulder, breathe in his cologne and gasp into his skin, and your mind goes hazy from the euphoria of his touch. Sure, you've hugged Suo before, been held by him before, and god knows you've been touched like this by a ton of other people before—but it feels different now. It feels different when it's Suo who's touching you, different when you’re this close to him while he's drawing all this pleasure out of you. When one hand feels so good inside you and the other one is holding you so intimately.

“Suo,” you whimper, overwhelmed by hot tension in your belly, “I-I’m close, I’m close, oh fuck—

He stops.

Before you can comprehend what's happening, he’s withdrawing his fingers, and all the heat in you is melting away. Your orgasm lost, you come down from your high—nerves frayed, emotions taut.

“Suo,” you say, “what the fuck?”

He gives you a smile. It almost looks nice. “I'm not letting you cum until you tell me the truth.”

You’re going to cry.

You're so wet, so empty, so desperate, and now you feel oddly afraid. You don't like the way he's staring you down. You don't like this line of questioning, this bullshit of engaging with other people's feelings. You’ve never liked it. But you need—need—him to fuck you. You need his fingers inside you and you need to cry into his neck while you finish.

You say, very quietly, “Please, Suo.”

“Please, what?”

It's funny. You've performed begging and crying and submission for countless clients, sometimes during annoyingly rough sessions. You've done it for years. But nothing has ever felt so humiliating as this moment, when you ask your best friend, in the smallest voice possible, “Please touch me.”

“No. Not until you start being honest with me.”

Suo's mouth curls at the devastated look you give him. You hardly even notice that he's adjusting you, having you straddle his thigh again—this time, facing him. You don't register it until your cunt is pressed into the wet spot you left earlier and he's saying, “You can move if you'd like. But I'm not touching you.”

“You’re fucking horrible,” you say with all your heart, but your pussy is throbbing and you're desperate for release. So you finally do what you were desperately trying to stop yourself from doing the whole night—you start grinding on him. Like a fucking animal in heat. It's embarrassing, especially because his leg feels so good against you. The friction on your pussy makes you pant, your eyes squeezing shut as your clit finally gets some pressure. It makes up for the way he’s looking at you, which is sly, handsome, and rage-inducing all at once.

“You really do need to be touched,” he remarks softly. “You said your customers satisfied you. Was that true? Did they properly fuck you?”

“N-no,” you gasp. Your mind feels so cottony now that you're getting some relief. You can barely think, and definitely not enough to lie. “It was—it was—fuck, I never came.”

He hums, satisfied. “There—see? Telling the truth isn't so hard. You can do it again.”

He sounds so condescending. You would ordinarily hate it, but for some reason, it's going straight to your pussy right now, making you drip so much you know you've ruined his pants. You’re getting close, too, just by rubbing yourself on his leg. It doesn't feel quite as good as when his fingers were in you, but it’s something. And it’s making it hard to focus on what he's saying.

“It’s fine if you can't be honest about your feelings,” Suo continues. “Let's assume you're telling the truth, and all you want to do is fuck me. Why haven't you?”

You try to answer him, but you can't. You're too focused on the roll of your hips against his leg. There's too much tension, too much heat. You melt against him again, breathing heavily into his shoulder as you tighten around nothing. His hands come to your waist, as if grounding you, and somehow this makes everything feel even better. You start panting, babbling, I'm close, I'm getting close, Suo, Suo—

His grip tightens, and he stops you in place. You cry in frustration—no tears, but the noise you make is broken.

“Answer my question,” he says. You feel a hand glide along your bare skin, stopping at your inner thigh. “Answer me and I'll touch you.”

“Okay,” you say, as desperate as you are distressed. “Okay, I'll do anything. Anything.”

“Good.” He sounds so pleased.

You put your arms around his neck, for no reason other than you want to. Lifting your hips, you part your legs for him, and you feel so relieved at just the touch of his hand that you sigh—even though all he's doing is running a finger along your slick folds.

You shudder as his fingers play with your sex. Lean your head on his shoulder as he starts to move. You’re so desperate that you start grinding against his hand, whining for him.

“Well, then,” he murmurs. “Tell me why you didn't come to me. This is all you wanted, isn't it?” He rolls your clit between two fingers, making you squirm. “Just to get off, right? I could have done that. You'd have enjoyed it more.”

“It”—your eyelids flutter shut—“it would have been too complicated. Y-you’re my boss, and I pay rent to y-you, and we’ve been friends for so long, I didn't want to make it weird—”

Suo delivers a sharp slap to your pussy.

The contact is so sudden that you yelp. It only stings a little, but it makes your clit ache. The noise it makes is so wet, so filthy, telling of your desperation. And to your shame—even though you have never once in your life enjoyed being handled roughly by your customers—your cunt starts leaking in response.

You whimper, about to burst from frustration. You need to be touched so bad. You need to be touched by him so bad, and you need to cum on his cock or else you'll lose your fucking mind.

“Suo,” you complain, or beg, and you don't even realise that you're tearing up until he swipes his thumb under your eye.

“Try again,” he says gently, but not kindly. “The truth this time, and then I'll make you cum. Why didn't you come to me first? These past few months, or any other time?”

You don't answer him. “Suo, please—” And he moves back so that you're no longer leaning against him. Your lip trembles at the loss of the warmth, which somehow feels worse than the loss of your orgasm. An actual tear rolls down your cheek, and he doesn't wipe this one away.

“Answer me,” he says firmly. Instead of replying, you try to reach for him—wanting to be pressed against his body again, wanting him to draw pleasure out of yours again—but he stills you with his hands.

You feel devastated.

Out of horny, emotional desperation, and an all-consuming need to be fucked, you admit, “I was just scared!”

This is the worst mistake you've ever made.

The minute the words dislodge from your throat, you feel yourself choke up. You don't know why. All you know is that you suddenly can't hold back your tears from your sexual frustration, which for some reason is starting to feel distinctly like a non-sexual kind of angst, which is also strangely painful for your chest.

Because now that you've said it out loud, you can't ignore it.

You want to hide. You want to crawl out of his lap and run out of the establishment. Surely, the mamasan will forgive you for leaving a shift with such a frightening and horrible man, who is currently trying to extort your feelings out of you. But Suo’s grip is solid and unforgiving on you, and all you can do is squirm.

“Scared of what?” Suo asks. His voice has gone soft. Actually soft—not in a way that suggests danger, but a way that suggests you're loved. It makes you tremble.

His arms circle you, and one rubs at your back. It makes you relax very slightly. Or at the very least, it makes you stop wanting to bolt.

“What were you scared of?” he prompts again.

A feeling of defeat washes over you. Suo will figure you out sooner or later. He always does. So you tell him, very quietly, “I was scared that—that you'd leave me.”

You realise that you just stuttered. You stuttered because you're crying. You're actually, genuinely crying. Not from sexual frustration, but because you're just frustrated in general. And miserable. You've been chronically miserable for most of your life, and that misery has had nowhere to go until now.

You press your face into Suo’s shoulder, and he lets you. You breathe deeply in an attempt to stop crying, his cologne washing over you. It's nice, but what feels most comforting is just the scent of him. You're used to it from the days before he'd ever thought about using a fragrance, let alone a fragrance that would bankrupt the average person. It's calming, even when overlayed with ambergris and vanilla. Familiar.

Your breathing evens out a little—but only a little.

“Why would I leave you?” His voice is so kind, patient. More tears bead on your lashes.

“Because you might not want me anymore.” You sound so fragile. Shit, you are fragile. You can't stop the splintering feeling in you, the same one that ate at you two months ago when you thought he was going to leave you. “You could get tired of me or resent me or get bored with me. You could—you could want to throw me away, for no reason. Or—” You breathe in sharply, clinging to him harder.

“Or?”

“Or you could die—you joined the yakuza, so you could die. Why did you do that?” An actual sob leaves you. His shirt is getting wet. You ruined so many of his silk changshan like this in the past, when your boyfriend cheated on you and when your parents kicked you out and when you slept with your fifth customer.

And when your master died.

“I'm still so fucking mad at you for it,” you bite out around your tears. “If you got fucking killed—oh my god, I can't even think about it. I can't—I couldn't take it if—if I kissed you, and we had sex, and then I didn't have you anymore.”

“Why not?”

“Because you’re the only thing I have.” You squeeze your eyes shut, a terrible realisation hitting you. “And…”

“And?”

“And,” you say, voice breaking, “I think because I love you?”

You know it as soon as you voice it. You do love him. Not just platonically, but in the way where you want to hold his hand and kiss him and marry him. In the way a miserable nineteen year old girl is so in love with her miserable best friend that she refuses to leave him despite how terrifying he’s becoming. You loved him in this way before you realised you wanted to have sex with him, and even after that, you loved him so much that it didn't matter that he wasn't having sex with you.

You love him so much it disgusts you.

You want to hide, but Suo forces you to look at him. He brushes away your tears, cups your face. The Pavlovian response takes over: your heart rate slows, and you calm down.

“There,” he says gently. “That wasn't so bad, was it?”

He’s wrong. You bet he knows he's wrong. That was objectively one of the worst experiences of your life. You feel wrung out, tenderised. You never thought you'd say any of that. You're not sure you knew most of that.

But in Suo’s arms, plied open with his words and his hands, you actually find yourself shaking your head. You lean into the touch of his palm.

“I love you,” he continues, his tone so authoritative and calm that it leaves no room for doubt, “probably to the point that it should scare you. Do you understand that?”

“Yes,” you say quietly.

“And we won't be separated. I won't allow anything to take you away from me. Do you understand that too?”

You make a noise, halfway between a relieved sigh and another sob. This declaration should not be a surprise from a man who’s effectively locked you up in his house. Still—your heart feels so light when you hear someone say, for the first time in your life, that they’ll stay with you no matter what. It's like Suo has just unearthed a weight that you didn't know you'd been carrying.

“I’ll try,” you reply, voice small.

“Good.” He strokes your cheek. “Do you want to keep going?”

It’s absurd. You just cried and confessed something terrifying. With anyone else, this would be an experience so horrifying that you'd leave right now and never come back. Your sexual desire should not just be gone, but permanently erased. At the very least, you shouldn't feel the slightest bit horny.

But somehow, being gutted by Suo hasn't left you feeling bad. It's left you feeling lighter. Kind of like you've been purged. You feel exhausted, but in a malleable way. Dazed and relieved to be in his lap. Your thighs are still embarrassingly sticky, heart still embarrassingly wobbly, and you just heard him say that he loves you.

Now you want to hear him say it while he's cumming inside you.

“Yeah,” you admit immediately, pathetically. You sniffle.

“You're sure?” Another stroke. “I want to hear you say it clearly. What do you want to do?”

Your dignity is gone. “I want you to fuck me.”

He smiles. A fond hum leaves him. “Good girl,” he murmurs, and you feel a flutter in your belly. “I'll take care of you now.”

He kisses you this time, before he touches you. On the neck, on your jaw. You bare your nape to him, shivering at the feeling of his lips on your jugular, at his nipping teeth on your skin. You realise he's leaving marks, and with each one, you shudder. It feels so intimate. You're on a rooftop bar, in a skanky hostessing dress, crying and strung out—but this is the closest thing you've ever gotten to one of your fantasies about him. Not the nasty ones that you think about when you're home by yourself, but the ones you think of when you're in bed with various salarymen. The ones where you get to lie with him in bed and press your lips to his.

“Suo,” you start.

“Hayato,” he corrects you. “You're my fiancée now, remember? We should be on a first name basis.”

Your stomach flips. “Hayato,” you try again, breathless. “Please.”

He takes a moment to reply, busy sucking another mark into your skin. “Please, what?”

You hesitate. Suo pulls back, looking at you. You whine, feeling shy all of a sudden. You flirt for a living and yet you feel embarrassed about your request. It's humiliating.

“Please, what?” he repeats. His mouth is curled in a smile, and you can't tell whether it's endeared or entertained. “Please let you cum? Please fuck you?”

“Please kiss me,” you say, in a small voice.

Suo pauses.

“What?”

“Please kiss me,” you beg. Close to tears again, for some reason you don't know. You think it surprises him as much as it does you.

It takes him a moment to recover, but when he does, he gives you a look that’s fucking ravenous.

His thumbs away the wetness from your eyes. “You're so cute sometimes. Did you know that?”

You flush. Plenty of customers have called you cute, but none have had you feeling so indignant nor shy.

“I’m not,” you reply, “and stop that.”

“But it's true. And I want you to know it.”

Suo presses his mouth to yours before you can respond. You're so eager for him that you part your lips immediately. Your instinct is to make your first kiss with him messy and desperate, but he’s in full control, and he’s taking his time. His tongue is careful and precise. Full of intention. His lips are slow, languid, and lazy, like he's savouring the taste of you. A hand plays with the strap of your dress. You feel him slide it off your shoulder—the other one quickly follows—but you’re so absorbed in his kiss, you hardly pay attention.

You're vaguely aware of the breeze against your bare chest. One of his hands moving up, feeling out your curves. He hums into your mouth when his fingers ghost over your nipples, and they harden under his touch.

“Suo,” you whine as he teases them, and he pinches one of them, watching as you squirm.

“Hayato,” he corrects you promptly, and you give him a worn, teary look.

“Hayato.”

“Yes?”

“I need more,” you say quietly.

He smiles, clearly enjoying your desperation. “Be patient,” he teases you. “I’m getting there.”

He kisses a line along your jaw, down your neck. Traces your collarbone with the path of his mouth, works his way down to your breasts. At the same time you feel the heat of his tongue on your nipple, his hand reaches between your legs. You're so wet already that he doesn't need to work you open again—just sinks his fingers inside you until you're sighing for him.

You discover that when he's not antagonising you, Suo is frighteningly efficient with pleasuring you. He learns quickly how you like your tits played with, and how to fuck you so well with his fingers until you're gushing around them and keening. He said he'd take care of you, but you think he's mostly forcing all this pleasure from your body for his own enjoyment. There's no other explanation for how he keeps bringing you to the edge and pulling you back, swallowing each of your whines and complaints with his mouth. The only time he isn't kissing you is when you're begging—and you don't miss the way his breathing deepens every time you do.

But no matter how much you beg, he isn’t letting you cum.

“Look at the mess you're making,” he murmurs as he plays with your cunt. You're sitting between his legs again, your back against his chest. You can feel the length of his cock against your ass, and you hear how his breath hitches every time you squirm against it. Except for that one tell, he sounds completely unaffected by what he's doing—forced you to open your legs wide for him, spread your glistening folds to tease you. The leather beneath your ass is wet, ruined by your need.

“Hayato,” you whine.

“Just a little longer,” he promises, “and then I'll let you cum.”

Your mind is so fogged with pleasure at this point that you can't focus on anything other than Suo’s touch. You’ve actually forgotten where you are—not a truly private space, but part of a club. The girls would normally only come up if you put in an order, but you haven't for a while now.

Long enough for someone to check on you without warning.

You tense as soon as you hear the door open. You recognize the server—she knows you well, by face, stage name, and real name. Your eyes go wide as she calls for you. You try to sit up, close your legs, but Suo grabs one of your thighs and forces it open.

“Suo, wait—”

You whimper, incapable of words when his fingers push into you again. He starts fucking you with them, and in earnest this time—curling his fingers until they're pushing into your g-spot, doing it over and over and over. Your eyes roll back and you stop struggling, and Suo takes the opportunity to touch you with his other hand too, playing with your clit. A strangled moan leaves you as the heat in your gut ratchets up. Pleasure swells in your belly; you feel like you're going to burst.

“Suo,” you cry, tears pricking your eyes, “wait, wait, my coworker—wait, I think—I think I'm gonna—”

“Go ahead,” he says into your ear, voice silky, and he pushes against your sweet spot in a way that gives you no choice but to obey him.

You cum so hard that you squirt all over the seat. Your whole body is wracked with intense pleasure—hips bucking violently, legs twitching, crying so loudly and shamelessly that your coworker naturally hears. She catches you spread wide open in Suo’s lap, his fingers deep in your messy, swollen cunt as you drench them.

Her tray clatters to the floor.

Fighting the mindless haze that your body is in, you glance at the other girl, whose hand is over her mouth. She looks appalled. She’s going to yell at you. But then you then watch, in real time, as her eyes travel to your customer’s face and she realises who he is. If she was red when she saw the two of you, she's now a pale white.

“Did you come to check on us?” Suo asks. He sounds amused. She flinches at his voice, and actually takes a step backward. “We’re fine for now. We’ll order something in a bit, and call you up here as usual.”

“O-okay,” she says, voice high and tense. “I—I’ll leave you two, then. Please—please enjoy yourself, sir. We'll be available in case you require any other services.” And she walks away briskly, almost in a run. She doesn't even bother to stop the expressly forbidden act that you're engaged in.

Once she’s gone, Suo allows you some dignity. He pulls his fingers out of you, lets you catch your breath.

“Oops,” he says. “It’s too bad they caught us. I suppose they won't want to keep you on as an employee, since you broke such an important rule.”

You stare at him, wide-eyed. Your emotional and sexual pliability quickly dissipates, replaced by disbelief.

“You—you did that on purpose,” you say between pants, too fucked out to be truly angry, but still appalled.

Suo raises a brow, gives you an innocent look. “Did I? I was just making you cum, like you've been begging all night. It was just unfortunate timing.” He then smiles, which makes him look incredibly kind despite the apparent sadism of his person. “But it's fine. They're going to fire you for this, but you know my club will always take you back.”

You close your eyes and groan. “You’re horrible.”

“I am, aren't I?” Suo puts his arms around you, kisses you on the shoulder, his voice getting low. “But this is a better arrangement, don't you think? You won't need to see customers this way. Every time you need relief, you can come upstairs and I'll give you my cock instead.” He grinds against you, letting you feel how hard he is, and you whimper. He laughs, probably entertained at how desperate you sound. “Or maybe I'll just make you take it whenever I feel like it. I think at the end of every shift makes sense, doesn't it? Since that's how often you've been touching yourself on the couch.”

“S-suo.”

“It’s Hayato now, remember. What is it, dear?”

He sounds so smug, mocking you. You should be furious. But in your fucked out state, all you can focus on is the idea of being forced to take Suo's cock every night. Despite already being ruined, your pussy starts throbbing again. You squirm and press your thighs together, trying to get it to stop—you’re so fucking tired—and you bleakly realise that you can't control your body’s reactions around him. You're getting wet again. It makes you want to cry.

“Hayato,” you whimper, on the verge of tears.

“Ah, you addressed me properly. Good.” He’s so satisfied. “What is it?”

“I…”

“You?”

“I”—your voice is so small and embarrassed, you can hardly believe it—“I want you to fuck me.”

He feigns shock, as if he wasn't actively provoking this. “Really? But you just came.” A hand prods between your legs. You obediently spread them for him, and he checks your pussy with two of his fingers. You moan a little at the intrusion, but there's no resistance at all.

Your cunt, still dripping, tightens around him, and he laughs softly.

“You really do need a cock in you. Who knew you had such a needy pussy.” He curls his fingers. Probably feeling the way it makes you gush, delighting in the gasp it draws out of you. “No wonder you have to use that toy every day.”

You're about to die of embarrassment. “Hayato. Please just fuck me.”

Suo turns you so that you can look at him. He’s wearing a kind, benevolent face when he says, “No.”

“...what?”

“I'm not going to give you my cock.” He hums, contemplative. “Not for a while, I think.”

“B-but,” you say, genuinely upset, “but you were just talking about doing that at work.”

“Sure—after we get married. It's only proper, don’t you think?”

“What?” Your eyes are wide in disbelief. “You—you just made me cum with your fingers. In a public space.”

“Yes. But that's different from letting you have my cock. It wouldn't be gentlemanly of me to do that before we’re wedded.” He can't keep the amusement out of his voice as he bullies you. “I'm sure you can wait until the summer, right? Since that's the season you chose for us. August, I think you told Nirei.”

“Hayato—”

“Actually,” he muses, easily sliding a third finger into you, making your voice clip off in a whimper, “I think you shouldn’t be allowed to have anything in you until then. Except for my fingers and tongue, of course. But no toys, and no other men either. That definitely wouldn't be proper.”

“I'm going to,” you say spitefully—and tearfully. “If you don't fuck me right now, I will sleep with other people.”

“I don't think you want to find out the consequences if you do.”

“How would you even—ngh—know?”

“Good question.” He starts pumping his fingers, and to your horror, your cunt needily swallows them with each motion, your body as desperate as he's been saying. “I guess I'll need to check your pussy every night. See if it's been stretched out by someone else’s cock. Maybe upstairs in the lounge at the end of each night, so I'll know that you haven't fucked a customer during a shift. Clearly, it's not impossible that you would.”

You try not to sob. Not only are his words utterly humiliating, they're making you wetter. After fucking so many people in so many ways, you didn't know it was possible for you to feel this much shame during sex—but then again, shaming people is one of Suo’s specialties.

You give him the teariest look possible, because by now you've figured out that he likes seeing you cry. Sadistic motherfucker. You're happy to use it to your advantage though.

He gets that hungry look in his eye again. “Please, Hayato,” you beg, voice trembling with need, “I want more. I thought I was your beautiful wife already.” You grind your ass against his cock, and he inhales sharply. “Don't you wanna cum in your wife’s pussy?”

Suo stops, deeply affected—just as you guessed he'd be. After making you his fake wife in both his criminal life and his civilian one, it's painfully obvious that the man is obsessed with marrying you. You'd make fun of him if you weren't so horny. Or humbled.

He only allows himself speechlessness for a second. He hums soon after, delicately wiping the tears out of your eyes. “You've been good enough that I guess I can reward you. I won't fuck you, but”—he shifts away, and you can hear his pants unzipping—“I’m sure you'll enjoy yourself anyway.”

Suo wasn't lying earlier. His cock is bigger than any toy you've ever used. It's pretty, too. Curved and long and flushed at the head. Glistening with prespend, which has pearled up at the tip. You think you might be salivating. For a minute, you contemplate asking if you can feel it in your throat, but then Suo’s lying down and moving you on top of him. When his cock nudges at your folds, you can’t help your excitement. You squirm, trying to sink onto his length.

His grip tightens on your waist, stopping you.

You’re about to whine at him about this, but he doesn't give you the chance. “If you try to ride me,” he says, in a voice so cold that you know he's not joking, “I'm not touching you until we’re married, and I'm not letting you touch yourself either.”

“...”

With anyone else you'd call bullshit, but you know that Suo is both crazy and petty enough to actually achieve this.

“Okay.” You sound and feel mollified. “I'll behave.”

He smiles. “Good,” he says cheerfully. “Just stay like that, then. I’ll take care of you.”

You listen to him, mostly because you're incredibly excited about getting pussy inspections and you'll be devastated if it doesn't happen. And you don't expect it to be a big deal, anyway. While your sex drive has been a constant source of grief for you throughout your life, you don't really have problems controlling any specific impulses in bed when you truly need to. You’re used to giving your customers whatever they want and, if you're lucky, getting off from it. You figure this will be the same.

You find out very quickly that it isn't.

You need to stay still. You can’t sink down on him. Two easy orders that are extraordinarily difficult when Suo is the one beneath you. You have to actively stop your hips from moving when you feel the silky head of his cock press into your folds, which are still dripping with your slick. Suo’s breath hitches when he runs the tip along your opening, drawing wet noises every time his cock head catches on your needy hole, smearing his precum all over it. All you want is to push back on him and let your pussy swallow his cock. You’re aching for it, and you know he is too. If you sank down on him now, he'd lose control and fuck you raw until he was cumming inside you. And then he'd probably keep going after that, not letting you move until you were stuffed full and dripping with his spend. Both of you know it.

But you don't do that. You're good for him. You sigh, just trying to enjoy the feeling of his length rubbing against you. How he's twitching and throbbing against you, how he wants as equally much to be inside you—but pulls back every time. Your mind goes a little fuzzy with the drawn out, low hum of pleasure, and you close your eyes.

Then he starts pushing into you.

“H-Hayato?” You whimper at the intrusion, at being made to take something so thick without warning. “I thought you weren't gonna—”

“I'm not,” he says. His breathing is heavier, his words strained, but his voice is still commanding when he says, “Don’t move.”

Suo doesn't give you the whole thing, just the tip. It is much harder to control yourself like this—when you can feel yourself getting stretched by the head of his cock, already so fat and heavy, but you don't get filled up by it. It makes you aware of how empty you are, and how wet you're getting. You bury your face into his neck and make a noise that's both tearful and pathetic.

It's not acting when you whine, in a watery, miserable way, “Please, Hayato. I need your cum in me.”

It's probably the crying that gets him. He inhales sharply, thrusting maybe a little deeper than intended. You groan at the extra inch of cock, eyes rolling back, and can't help the way your pussy tightens and drips, trying to suck him in.

“Fuck,” he says, and then he pulls out.

He lays you flat on your back. Before you can get so much as a word out, he's between your legs and pressing his cock against your entrance. For possibly the happiest moment of your life, you think Suo is going to fuck you—but instead he starts pushing the slick head of his cock right against your neglected clit.

You aren't going to complain.

You whimper as he starts rubbing against your sex, leaving his prespend all over your swollen bud. It makes you squirm, grinding yourself against it, and you press your legs together to get some more pressure for the both of you. Soon his cock is sliding between your thighs, getting them all sticky with his prespend. You can feel the length of him hot and slick against your folds, heavy and throbbing.

You've never cum like this before. It was never enough stimulation when your customers made you do this, which nearly all of them have. But the pressure on your clit and on your folds is shockingly intense as the two of you move, enough to make you whimper as a familiar tension builds. It's not as overwhelming as when his fingers were inside you, but it's enough for you to start panting at the tension in your belly. You can hear Suo’s breath picking up as you start to whine, and he watches you, almost predatorial, as another orgasm crashes over you. You moan his name as you cum, squeezing a few more tears out of your eyes.

He stares at your flustered, wet face as he pushes the head of his cock against your entrance again, fisting himself as it flutters and drips in the aftershock of your orgasm. Suo’s been hard for so long, for the whole time he's teased and bullied you—you aren't surprised at how close he already is. Especially not when you start talking about how much you need his cum in you, how empty your pussy feels without it, how badly you want your husband to fill you up. All with your mascara smeared and your lip trembling, a sight that makes him throb.

Suo groans as he finally cums. You can feel his cock twitching, warmth spurting out onto your folds, and then into your pussy as he thrusts shallowly into you. You pull him down needily as he fills you, and he indulges you with a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss.

When he pulls out, you can feel his cum drip out of you, all the way down to the couch. You make a happy noise at the mess he's made of your hole, giving him a lovestruck, dreamy expression.

“You should do that every night after you're done checking my pussy,” you sigh.

Suo’s mouth curls, and breathes out a kind of laugh. He holds your face, and one of his tassels brush against the shell of your ear as he presses his forehead to yours. “I’ll do it if you're good for me.”

“I’ll be on my best behaviour until our wedding night,” you promise, voice affectionate.

Suo gives you a fond look. His expression is so sentimental. You think he’s going to say something sweet.

“Alright,” he replies. “Then be good for me and keep the rest of that inside you, okay? Let’s not make a mess of these floors. I don't want to get blacklisted from this club.”

You open and close your mouth, completely speechless.

“You're fucking horrible,” you say with all your heart, and he laughs and kisses you, and kisses you, and kisses you. He doesn't stop until you're placated and horny again.

Suo takes his sweet time pushing his cum into you as deeply as possible, saying that it's to make sure you don't lose any of it, but really so he can draw another orgasm out of you. Knowing that the mamasan might take pity on you and think that you were coerced into degrading sexual acts by a terrifying yakuza client, he makes sure to order a drink beforehand, calling up a server. (I don't want to be a bad patron, he hums as he looks at the tablet, and I said I'd get you to the number 1 ranking, right?) It subsequently looks, sounds, and is completely consensual when you're found pulling at Suo’s hair, keening as he fingers his cum into you while sucking on your clit.

This leaves you with no hope of continued employment on all of Keisei Street.

To add insult to injury, you do make a mess of the floors, despite Suo’s conscientious efforts to avoid this—though it's not as bad as the one you left on the couch. You also can't find your thong anywhere, which you guess is something else that the mamasan won’t appreciate when she finds it. Still, for the rest of the night, everyone shows Suo nothing but the utmost respect and highest quality customer service. They even ask how he found your company and if he has any feedback for you. He praises your conversational skills, karaoke abilities, and how capable you were in catering to his many needs. He also lets them know that you'll be resigning.

Hanzo and Shuuhei are waiting to pick you up, bringing the Rolls Royce with the privacy suite. This time, Suo doesn't use it to interrogate you; he instead uses it to kiss you and tease you and discuss wedding plans. If it'll be indoors or outdoors. If you'll have a big reception or a small one. If it'll be a traditional wedding, or if you’ll want a Chinese one like the one your master would have maybe liked to see. You settle on having a Shinto ceremony and a Chinese-style reception. Having been raised Chinese, whenever Suo imagined marrying during his teenage years, you were always in a red qipao. His master even once told him that if he managed to win your heart, he'd organise a tea ceremony and act in the role of Suo’s father.

After disclosing these facts (the first of which makes your heart weak, and the second of which leaves it aching), he asks about any long-standing things you've always wanted to do with him as a couple. If you had any silly or indulgent daydreams about your future with him, and what they were like.

“I don't know,” you admit. “I guess after you applied to teacher’s college, I liked the idea of marrying you, and doing all the domestic things you talked about. Though you were just joking at the time.”

You don't really expect him to remember much about this particular line of teasing. Sure, the man is currently obsessed with marrying you, and maybe he daydreamed about it a little bit when he was younger—but he mostly treated the idea as a funny joke when he was a teenager. All of the teasing has probably blurred together for him over the years. Certainly, it has for you.

But you've never been able to forget this particular memory. It’s one of those small, inconsequential moments that you find yourself incapable of letting go to this day. You loved hearing him talk about getting married, even though it hurt immensely that it was probably just teasing. You loved it because you wanted it. You wanted Suo to teach people because you knew he was good at it and it would make him genuinely happy. You wanted to stop working in the red light district and make a nice and safe home for Suo, just as he'd made a nice and safe home for you. And you wanted to marry him and kiss him and have sex with him and only him for the rest of your life.

You wanted it so badly, it still makes you heart ache to think about it.

He was definitely just teasing you, though. Suo was a sane person at the time, and sane people do not actually plan a marriage and life with someone before dating them or even fucking them. Most importantly, a sane person wouldn't hold onto such a silly joke for so long. Oh, you expect him to say, laughing. You're right, I had nearly forgotten.

But all he does is give you a smile. It's one of his strange, enigmatic ones.

“No, I was quite serious about it,” Suo says, looking right at you.

You stare at him.

“Really?”

“Really.”

He's being so straightforward, so earnest. Your typical reaction would be to feel flustered, sentimental—but something about his expression and tone bothers you. But before you can suss out what it is, he continues, and the moment passes.

“Was there anything else you ever wanted to do?” he asks smoothly.

You're startled, off-guard. “Oh, um… not really. I never let myself think too much about it.”

“Come on,” he prods. “There must be something.”

“No, I really didn't think of any ideas on my own. Although…”

Your face gets hot as you trail off. Suo senses weakness, and goes in for the kill.

“Although?”

“It's too embarrassing,” you admit, looking away, and Suo looks a little too interested as he pesters you for an answer.

“Come on, it's fine.” His mouth curls in a way that tells you it's not fine. “I promise I won't judge you. I just want to know what I can do to make you happy as your husband.”

You give him an uncertain look, and say your only concrete fantasy about him so quickly and quietly that he misses it.

“Pardon?” he asks.

“...romantic, vanilla sex.”

Suo blinks. “What?”

Your face burns with humiliation.

“I used to think about having romantic, vanilla sex with you. When I was a teenager. A lot.” Said as if you weren't just thinking about it two months ago in a love hotel, and still don't want it now. You wouldn't even bring it up if you didn't think it was necessary. But unfortunately, you're professionally skilled at perceiving people’s sexual interests, and you've perceived that Suo is sexually a freak. He was definitely going easy on you tonight, and is probably actively planning to get worse. You'll never have normal sex with him unless you explicitly state a desire for it.

Suo gives you a surprised look. “That's… a very mundane fantasy.”

“It wouldn't have been mundane to me,” you reply, somewhat defensively. “I used to think about it when I slept with my customers, who weren't very romantic. Or vanilla. So I didn’t really have a good reference point or anything for that kind of sex, but sometimes I still thought about doing it with you after they had left.”

You look away after saying this, wondering why you disclosed all of that. It certainly wasn't necessary for your dream of someday taking Suo’s cock without being psychosexually tortured first. Now you feel like you need to hide. You even think about excuses for stopping the car, and ponder again how difficult it would be to live without proof of identity, if you chose to run away.

But Suo doesn't let you run. He pulls you close to him, wrapping you up in his warmth.

“It's okay,” he says gently, in a voice that reminds you of how he was in his old Furin days. “You'll be okay. I'll make sure of it.” It confuses you deeply, and you turn to ask him what the fuck he's going on about.

You don't even realise you're crying until he starts kissing away your tears.

You can’t understand why you’re weeping. Maybe something strange and hormonal happened while you were having sex, like Suo made you orgasm too hard and all the oxytocin is making you depressed now. Though you think that hormone is supposed to make you happy. You're not sure. You never finished school, so you wouldn't know.

Whatever the reason, you hastily wipe away your tears. A hand rubs at your back, and you let yourself press your face into his shoulder.

“Sorry,” you say quickly.

“Don't apologise. You don't have anything to be sorry for.”

You hesitate as you breathe against the silk threads of his shirt, thinking about how many of his shirts you've ruined with your tears. At least three changshan and one Versace summer piece, by your count. It’s not like he hurts over the money these days, but guilt tugs at your heart.

“I don't know about that,” you mumble into his shoulder. And it takes a while to work yourself up to saying it, but eventually you whisper, with full honesty, “I'm sorry for always worrying you.”

“I know,” Suo says. He sounds sincere when he says, “I’m sorry too.”

“I’ll try to be better from now on.”

“You will be. And even if you aren’t, that's fine.”

For some reason, that makes your heart squeeze.

You melt against Suo after that, listening to the steady roll of tires and passing traffic outside. There's a gentle pitter patter of rain against the car roof, tinny and rhythmic, that gradually crescendos into a proper storm. The windshield wipers squeak against the glass. All of the noise is lulling you into a kind of peace, or maybe you're just feeling that way because Suo is holding you.

Fatigue wears your consciousness, and you close your eyes. The hustle and bustle of the red light district grows distant, faint—partly from slipping in and out of your dreams, and partly from the quieting world outside. It's now completely silent other than the heavy rainfall. You think they must be taking the road through Makochi. Suo asks for it whenever he wants you to sleep well.

He probably thinks you're asleep when he says, “I’m sorry for being how I am now.”

You almost stop breathing. Almost.

“You didn't fall in love with me when I was like this, so you must not like it very much,” he continues. “I know that Master wouldn't like me much either, if he were alive. He always said that you should support your loved ones until they can stand on their own two feet. But lately, I feel like all I've been doing is breaking yours.”

He sighs. The sky groans with distant thunder.

“Sakura knows who I really am, you know,” he says quietly. “I think he's worried about what'll happen to you if we get married. Though he’s been worried about you for a while.” Suo almost sounds endeared when he adds, “Did you know he only texts me now to ask if you're okay? He really does love you.”

He’s more sombre when he continues, “But Nirei is just afraid of me. That’s why he’s never around. He’s going to call you in a week and tell you not to go through with the wedding. He’ll probably tell you to leave me too. It’s good advice.”

It's hard to keep your breathing slow, with how badly your heart hurts.

“I’ve tried to go back to how I was, to the kind of person that Master was trying to raise,” Suo confesses. “But I don't think I can get better.”

But even if you can't, you want to tell him, that’s fine. You wish you could hold him how he's always held you.

“It doesn't usually upset me nowadays,” he admits after some time, “how I am now. But to be honest, talking about our school days did make me feel bitter, because I can't give you the things I know you wanted.”

He kisses the top of your head. Gently, so as not to wake you from your dream.

“I'm sorry I never became a teacher. I'm sorry I joined the yakuza. I'm sorry I can't give you a normal life. And I'm sorry I can’t have an honest conversation with you.”

Silence. You feel his chest stop briefly, his breathing deepen.

“Maybe someday, I'll get better enough to say these things to you while you're awake. Maybe someday, I'll even get better enough to let you leave. It would be best for you.”

His voice gets even softer. Tender.

“But for now, I don't know how to let you go.”

You feel a hand shifting away, the soft noise of leather against skin. Then both arms around you again, even warmer, even tighter. He’s leaning his head against yours. You think Suo is falling asleep.

Allowing yourself a single, quick glance at the car, you peer at your reflections in the rearview mirror. You see sheets of rain sliding against the back window, his dark lashes pressed to his skin, and all the scar tissue he likes to keep hidden away.

And you can see, very clearly, tears beneath his missing eye.

END 'TOKYO VICE'

hi everyone thanks for reading this chapter!!!! i hope it didn't disappoint after all the shitposting i did about it this week lol

can i just say. this was straight up the weirdest sex scene I've ever written HASLKFJSDF and the mood whiplash throughout this was probably the craziest i've ever written within a single piece. unfortunately, this reader copes with her trauma via humour and sex and it really shows rip. i hope it wasn't too offputting!

thank you to everyone who left a comment on part 1!! please do let me know if you enjoyed part 2 as well. <333

tagging @kweenkatsuki-fics and @stuckindreamland06!

[arilevenatz]

Chasing Shadows

Pairing: popular guy!yeosang x chubby!fem!reader

Genre: Angst (?), fluff

Word count: 5.3k

Warnings: kinda frat boy yeosang, him and his friends are handsome (yes that's a warning), reader has anxiety, she is also insecure, anxiety attacks, yeo is cheeky, like really cheeky, you might wanna flick him a bit, bestfriend! San and wooyoung, suicide mentioned, lmk if I missed any!!

AN: y'all bear with me this is my first time posting on Tumblr, I'm still figuring out stuff. I had a dream about this and I decided that I'm gonna write a yeo fic. And also please reblog and like, so I can get more motivated!!

Yeosang was a quiet and smart guy in the class. He used to talk only when spoken to. Except his little friend group, well maybe not so little. All the students seem to respect him of some sort. He and his group almost seemed, untouchable. Not like they were the popular group or something. Neither were they hostile. They were just really handsome. The whole group looked like they walked out of a movie set of a kdrama.

You were not new to this. But not particularly known as well. Honestly you didn't care. You stopped caring since high school. The only thing you knew about him was that he was a guy from a group.....and he was good at maths. You were a normal student, yes, maybe you scored the top score in Psychology in your college anyone has ever had, but that's just irrelevant right? In the end, nobody cares.

But you were wrong, he cares. So much so that he came and sat beside you in English class. Not particularly unlikely for someone to sit beside you. You usually didn't even care. But he isn't just somebody. He is the Yeosang. The same guy that all the girls swooned over just cuz he showed his birthmark. What's so impressive about birthmarks anyway? It's just a mark.

At first, you didn't care. But then it started to repeat. Everyday he would come and sit beside you (cause language classes were mandatory everyday) and heck you were not liking the attention you were getting.

"Hey, you should not get close to yeosang or anyone in their group. I heard they are gangsters" "I heard they are no good" "They are in a satanic cult where they sell their souls to the devil to live for eternity!!"

Yeah needless to say people had some crazy rumours about them. You? you didn't care. And also who the fuck would sell their soul to live forever. You'd rather do that to die painlessly, cause life. But for some reason, they seem to keep their distance from the group but admire them from afar. Almost as if they are scared of them.

Anyway people are quick to come to conclusions. But you were not like that. You were annoyed. Like why the fuck you sitting next to me dude go away. But of course you're an unproud introvert. You can't just tell him to leave that's rude. So you did the next best thing. Just sit somewhere else. If he really liked that seat, he could have his nook. You're gonna go and distance yourself. Not cause you are scared of him, but you know just to be careful. (Keep gaslighting yourself queen)

Yeosang walks into the classroom and scans the big room, his eyes narrowing as he doesn't see you in your usual seat. His headphones in he hesitantly approaches the desk where you're now sitting and pulls out the chair beside you, sitting down heavily. You mentally slap your forehead. This really is helping your reputation.

Yeosang looks at you with a raised eyebrow, clearly confused. He glances around the room, noticing the other students staring at you both. After a moment of silence, he turns back to you and notices your ears are red. He asks in a low tone, "What's going on? Why are you sitting somewhere else today?" Wow he's talking to me now

Yeosang gaze stills, and he leans back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. "You're avoiding me because of what people are saying about me, isn't it?" His voice is deep, but oddly quiet. It was something you've never heard before. And you couldn't pinpoint his emotions.

"Well kinda. But that doesn't mean I actually believe them. I just don't like people." You say thinking you weirded him out and hoping he'll leave you alone assuming you're an antisocial animal.

A flicker of something passes through Yeosang's eyes at your blunt response. He uncrosses his arms and leans forward, his elbows resting on the desk. "I get it. You don't trust easily. Neither do I." He pauses, considering his words carefully. Bro stop talking to me ?!

You don't react to his words and just look at the front. Your whole face feels warm. It's that feeling you get when you're embarrassed. Feeling everyone's eyes on you. You felt anxious, thinking everyone was judging you. You hate this feeling. You felt exposed to everyone. Even though they don't give two shits about you. It's that bubbling feeling inside the pit of your stomach. The heaviness in your chest. That shakiness in your hands and legs. You really felt like it would be nice if the floor split in half and eat you alive.

The class finish and you quickly pack up and leave, avoiding him again. Yeosang watches you rush out the door without a backward glance. His looks at your leaving figure with a thoughtful expression. The next day, he arrives early to claim the seat next to you again, determined to break through your walls.

As the class enters, Yeosang is already seated in your usual spot, his arms crossed and pen spinning in his hand. His presence seems to command the attention of the room, but he pays no mind to the whispers or curious glances directed at him. Instead, his focus is fixed on the doorway, waiting for your arrival. When you finally enter, he notices how you hesitate at the sight of him already occupying your seat. It was then when he looked down and started to scribble something in his notebook. You try to skip the vacant seat beside him and go further behind but he reaches out and grabs your backpack, pulling it onto the empty seat beside him. He continues to write, his pen scratching against the paper in a steady rhythm. After a moment, he glances up and meets your gaze, his expression unreadable. "You're late".

You sit down quietly, take off your glasses and rub your face, ignoring him. Here we go again, I'm tired of this shit.. What does a girl do to have some peace? Witnessing your frustration, a slight smile appears on his lips as he reaches for your glasses. "Hey," he says in a low voice, just audible enough for you to hear. His fingers brush against yours as he takes the glasses from your hand, then deliberately places them back on your face, adjusting them slightly. "Wear them"

The teacher comes in and starts to teach. You sit there, staring blankly at the teacher writing on the board, but your mind is elsewhere. You replay the moment he adjusted your glasses, trying to read into his expression. You begin to imagine that he looked disgusted, that he must think you're hideous without your glasses on. You can't help but feel self-conscious. You catch yourself unconsciously touching your glasses, as if to double-check they're still there. You imagine him whispering to his friends about how ugly you look without them, how he's only sitting next to you as a joke. You felt yourself picking at your finger nails, your legs bouncing up and down continuously with the approaching thoughts.

During a brief moment when the teacher turns away to write on the board, Yeosang leans in closer to you. His voice is low and barely audible, "Stop picking at your nails, it's distracting" He says it bluntly, without any real malice, before returning his attention to the lecture.

"Im sorry" you apologise quietly. Wait why the fuck did I apologise, I did nothing wrong.

Over the next few days, a pattern emerges. Yeosang continues to sit next to you in class, trying to engage in conversation, but you always find a way to shut him down or quickly change the subject. He notices that you avoid him between classes, always taking a different route. You think it's working, driving him away slowly. Maybe he'll realise you really are weird and will leave you alone. But something quite opposite happens.

Yeosang starts to get frustrated with the constant rebuffs. He can't understand why you're so hostile towards him, especially since he's trying to be friendly. One day, as you're walking down the hallway, he blocks your path, forcing you to stop and look at him. "What's your problem?"

"What is your problem?" You say, as he blocks your path with his body. "My problem? You're the one who's been acting like I've got a disease every time I try to talk to you." You open your mouth to say something but he beats you to it. "You're always shutting me down, avoiding me, and picking at those damn nails of yours. It's like you can't stand my presence."

You look down, sighing loudly and look up to him. "Then take the damn sign man, I don't wanna talk to you or engage in any activity that involves you" yeah that'll do, that gotta be the most rude thing you say to anyone, that'll definitely shoo him off. But again, the universe says fuck you and the opposite happens. Yeosang's eyes widen in surprise at your blunt words. For a moment, he stares at you, his expression unreadable. Then, unexpectedly, he bursts into laughter - a deep, genuine sound that echoes through the hallway. This fucker-

"What's so funny?" you ask, clearly embarrassed. Yeosang continues to laugh, his shoulders shaking as he looks you up and down. When he finally composes himself, he wipes tears from his eyes and says, "Damn, I like you even more now. You're fucking hilarious. Alright, fine, I'll take the sign."

He did not take the sign. Yes he did stop directly talking to me, but he won't actually leave me alone. He is still in the shadows. He stopped sitting beside me but went behind me. He stopped walking with me but started following me around.

Yeosang finds your stubborn refusal to engage endearing rather than frustrating. Instead of backing off as you hoped, he shifts tactics. He maintains a subtle presence in your peripheral vision. You catch glimpses of him behind you in class, always watching. At lunch one day, yeosang casually sits at the table next to yours with a group of his friends. He doesn't look at you directly, but you can feel his eyes flicking in your direction

Yeosang's friends chat with him, but he only half-listens, his attention constantly drifting to you. He murmurs something to them, and they glance over at you, exchanging curious looks. His friend, wooyoung asks him "yo man, how's your pursuing that girl going?" Another guy, San, says "I don't know if you can call it pursuing dawg, all he does is follow the girl around the college like a creep." Wooyoung pops a cookie in his mouth and says "Damn man, I didn't know you were like this"

"Shut up about her." His tone is casual, but there's an edge to it - protectiveness almost. He keeps his voice low enough that only they can hear, "She's... different. Fuck, I don't know why, but she's got me twisted up." Wooyoung grins mischievously, "Ah ha! You're falling for her aren't you? You're actually trying to chase a girl who isn't subtly throwing herself at you." He laughs, nudging yeosang's arm. "But that's not really gonna work is it? you need to fucking commit to it"

Yeosang's expression darkens slightly, his eyes narrowing. He takes a swig of his soda before responding, "What do you suggest then, genius? You think I should just walk up to her and...?" He leaves the sentence hanging, waiting for Wooyoung's input. "Yes, you should" San says without missing a beat. San's straightforward approach makes him smirk, but a flash of uncertainty crosses his face. "And what if she..." He pauses, running a hand through his styled hair "... what if she thinks I'm weird?" His eyes shift in your direction for a brief moment before focusing back on his friends. "Bruh, the way you've been acting all these days, she probably already thinks of you like that by now"

Yeosang scoffs, shaking his head disbelievingly. "Fuck, when you put it like that..." He leans back in his chair, crossing his muscular arms over his chest, his silver chain catching the light. "Maybe it's time to switch things up then."

The library is large and quiet, with tall bookshelves filling the room. The shelves are packed with books of all colors. Sunlight shines through colorful windows, making pretty patterns on the floor. A few students sit quietly, reading or studying. It's a peaceful place to think and learn. As you enter the library, the usual silence is interrupted only by the rustling of pages and the occasional whisper. You find a quiet corner to sit down and start reading. After a few minutes, you hear footsteps approaching. You don't pay much attention, assuming it's just another student.

You felt them sit down across from you. Your body tenses slightly as you notice the movement, causing you to glance up from your book. Through your peripheral vision, you catch sight of the person who just sat down across from you - it's him again. It's been weeks since he has been silently following you around, but now he approached you again.

His presence looms oddly, a juxtaposition in this sanctum of silence. He gazes at you, an unreadable expression on his chiseled face, his fingers absentmindedly tracing the cover of a thick tome he's brought with him. "Hey." You answered him silently "hey...." He leans forward slightly, the movement causing the leather of his jacket to creak softly. "Look... I know you probably think I'm being kinda creepy and shit..." He runs a hand through his messy dark hair, looking uncomfortable for once, unlike his usual composed demeanor.

He takes a deep breath, as if gathering his thoughts. "I just... I wanted to talk to you, ya know? You're different from the other girls at school. You're always so... quiet, so focused on your books."

"You're so different, you're the most unique girl I've ever met. You're my type, are you gonna say this? All those lame shit people say in movies? Please stop mocking me" His expression freezes for a moment, caught off guard by your blunt response. Then, to your surprise, he lets out a low, genuine laugh. "Shit, you're right. That was cheesy as hell." He shakes his head, a small smirk playing on his lips. You were listening to him. But something inside you stirred and you felt angry. You remembered all those times those people in middle and high school bullied you. All those times you felt that every time you entered the room, everyone looked at your body and you felt insecure. All those times your family members indirectly forced you to believe that you can only be loved when you lose weight. And you snapped. "stop mocking me. I know people like you. you guys go up to girls like me and say you like them only to say 'April fools' or say 'its a dare' later. I hate guys like you"

His grin fades, his expression turning serious, but his eyes still hold a glint of mischief. "You really think that's what I'm doing?" He tilts his head to the side, studying your face intently. He maintains eye contact, his expression unreadable. He sees the suspicion in your eyes, and it only seems to fuel his mischievous glint. He leans forward, his voice lowering. "Let me ask you something..." He studies your face intently, a slight smirk playing on his lips. "First off... do I look like I have a problem finding girls to talk to?" He gestures to himself, a hint of pride in his tone. "And second..." His voice drops lower as he deliberately maintains eye contact. "Second what?" You shout.

"No shouting in the library student!" The librarian warned you. You sit back down embarrassed and all red.

He laughs a little and says "Second, would I really waste my time pretending to like someone just to play an April Fool's prank?" His words send a shiver down your spine as he pulls back, his eyes never leaving yours. "Or maybe..." He looks at you with a half-smirk, half-serious expression "You're actually quite... interesting. Not many people stand up to me like you do." His eyes crinkle again as he studies your reaction "And hey..." He reaches over and lightly taps your finger. You retreat your hand from his touch. His expression shifts to a playful pout, though his eyes still hold a glint of amusement "Wow, so I'm not even worthy of a tiny hand tap?" You shake your head as a 'No'. He leans back in his chair, studying your defensive posture with interest "You're not scared of me, are you?" He chuckles low in his throat, his gaze never leaving yours even though you fail to keep eye contact, "listen, can I not just like you? I like you. I want to be with you"

"No! people don't simply like girls like me" you felt like crying, but you can't. His expression turns mockingly serious, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Oh, so you're saying you're not likeable? You think I can't like you because you're... what?" He crosses his arms, leaning forward again, his curiosity piqued. You were getting annoyed.

"You know what I am"

"No I don't"

"Fuck. Fine! Im fat and ugly"

His face freezes and for a moment, he looks genuinely shocked. But then, he lets out a harsh laugh. "Fat and ugly? He shakes his head, his gaze raking over your form appraisingly. "You really think that's what I see when I look at you?"

"You don't need to look at me like that, I am like that so fuck off I don't need you laughing at my face."

You stand up harshly, take your bag and walk outside the library. He follows you and grabs your upper arm, not harshly but firmly enough to hold your attention. "Listen carefully..." His voice softens, losing its usual mocking tone. "I'm not some creep who goes around lying to get in girls' pants." You open your mouth to say something but he quickly shuts you off. "You know what I see when I look at you? I see someone who's honest, even if it hurts. I see someone who's strong, even when they feel weak. And I see someone who's fucking beautiful, inside and out."

"Everyone says that but that's actually never true!"

"Then tell me, what do you see when you look in the mirror? Because whoever made you believe these lies about yourself? That person's fucking blind."

"Im not about to start talking to you as if you're my therapist. You let me go"

He loosens the grip but still holds onto your hand. "Alright, But just so we're clear? You're not fat, and you're definitely not ugly. You can tell me why you feel that way"

You wriggle your hand out of his hold and finally look at him. You've had enough.

"Fine, you wanna know? I am chubby, and I'm ok with that, I have no problem being chubby. it's just tiring for me because ppl always make it seem like I'm some disgusting things that doesn't deserve humanity" you take a breath and star again, "And you cannot say anything to me because you wanted this, you wanted me to say all these"

You look down, feeling defeated. It's so weird to word these things to someone, considering you had no one growing up. No siblings, no bestfriends, no close cousins. Even your parents never listened or talked to you about how you felt. You were truly tired. You felt two hands hold your shoulder. You look up, and it's Yeosang.

"People are fucking idiots. And the fact that you're okay with being yourself makes you hotter than anyone who tries to fit into some bullshit beauty standard." His jaw clenches at your words, a hint of something flashing in his eyes. He looked angry.

"Those assholes can keep their narrow-minded opinions. Because someone who stands up for themselves like you just did? Someone who owns their worth instead of begging for validation"

His gaze intensifies, filled with a newfound respect and... something deeper. "That's the kind of person who deserves to be cherished. And anyone who can't see that? They're the ones who are fucking ugly, inside and out."

He sees the unspoken acknowledgment in your eyes, the silent absorption of his words. It's the first time he's seen you listen so intently, without pushing him away or rolling your eyes. He swallows hard, realizing the power of his words on you.

His monologue ended. And it was everything you wanted to hear all these days. The words you wanted your parents to say to you, the words you needed. He said everything. It was the first time in a while you felt like you can actually believe someone. But you were not like this. Circumstances made you so that you push away everyone. And that has become your nature. If I can push them away before they can, I won't be hurt.

"I appreciate your words towards me, but I don't know anything about your confession. I-I don't think so I can accept it"

He nods slowly, a small smile playing on his lips. "I get it. It's a lot to take in, especially coming from a person like me." He leans in closer, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "Tell you what - how about I show you my worth?"

You look up at him, bewildered. What does he want. Is he crazy? Has he lost his marbles? Is he that bored? All these questions flood your mind but only one thing slips out of your mouth, "huh?" His smile grows wider, a spark of mischief in his eyes. "You know, prove to you that I'm not just some dumb guy who talks big." He pauses, studying your face. "I'll do something for you. Something that shows you I'm more than just words. I'll court you"

You were speechless. "I-I don't need-"

He puts a finger on your lips to shut you up. "Let me finish," He says, his tone leaving no room for argument. "I'm not doing this to pressure you or anything stupid like that. I just want a chance to show you who I really am, beyond the tough act."

Looking at your eyes, he realised how hurt you were. He exhales slowly, a hint of vulnerability in his eyes that he rarely lets anyone see. "I know I'm not the prince charming type. But maybe that's a good thing. Maybe you deserve someone who fights for you, who understands the real world and all its fucked up beauty."

The next day, as you walk into college, you catch him standing beside the gate. Wearing his signature black attire with silver accessories. As you walked towards the gate, he saw you and he got off the wall and walked towards you. He stops in front of you, his hands in his pockets as he looks down at you with a small smile. "Morning," He says, his voice casual but with an underlying warmth. "I was waiting for you."

"Good morning" you look around and see people look at you for a moment and then look away. It made your face feel hot from embarrassment.

He holds your cheeks and moves your face towards him "don't look at them. ignore them" You both start walking towards the class. As they walk side by side, Yeosang couldn't help but let out a light chuckle, shaking his head slightly. "You know, I never thought I'd be one for this whole 'gentleman' thing. But here I am, walking you to class like some corny love story."

You were quick with your answer, "You wanted this. I'm positive by the end of this week, you won't want to be with me"

His smile fades a bit at your words, a hint of seriousness entering his eyes. "And why's that?" He asks, his voice low and even. "You think you're that hard to handle?" He smirks, but there's an underlying challenge in his gaze. You wait for him, to say further, but he waits for your answer. You look to the side, taking in a breath and say "Yes."

He stops walking abruptly, turning to face you directly. His expression is intense, a blend of amusement and determination. "Well, guess what? I've dealt with thorns, I've tangled with barbs, I've faced off against the sharpest minds and the coldest hearts."

You stare at him for a while and then "damn you really did become philosophical"

He barks out a short, surprised laugh, shaking his head as he starts walking again, this time more aggressively. "Philosophical? Nah, just stating facts." He glances at you sideways, a mischievous glint in his eye. You shake your head and follow him to the class.

Over the next few days, Yeosang continues to act like your doting boyfriend, much to the confusion and entertainment of your classmates. He walks you to class, sits with you at lunch, and even "accidentally" brushes your hands during lessons.

After school one day, he suddenly grabs your hand and starts dragging you towards the nearby ice cream shop. When you resist, he stops and turns to face you with a stubborn expression. "Come on, I'm buying you ice cream. Don't make a scene."

"I don't want ice cream"

He ignores your protests, opening the door to the ice cream shop and practically pushing you inside. "you're getting it anyway, pick a flavour"

Eventually you were forced to have a large ice cream cone with chocolate and Butter scotch, your two favourite flavours.

You both start walking towards your house "I don't like when people spend money on me" He shrugs it off, "Too bad, I spent the money anyway." He says nonchalantly, walking beside you with his hands shoved in his pockets. As you get closer to your house, he pauses and looks at you sideways, "You going to invite me in now?"

He wants to come inside my house now?

"in my house? My mom's in the house"

He looks at the door for a bit, then "how about I talk to my future mom in law beforehand and ask for her daughter's hand in marriage now." and walk right in as you had unlocked the door. You run to stop him but the damage was already done.

Yeosang finds himself standing in a neat, tidy living room. A woman with short, dark hair and piercing eyes is sitting on the couch, reading a book. She looks up as he enters and her gaze locks onto him. For a moment, Yeosang is taken aback by the intensity of her stare.

You trail behind, shocked by the ongoing staring contest between them.

He clears his throat professionally, straightening his posture "Good evening ma'am. I'm Kang Yeosang, your daughter's classmate. I was hoping we could have a word." He maintains a polite, respectful tone despite his usual confident demeanor, feeling the weight of this mother's presence.

The woman closes her book and places it on the coffee table. She stands up slowly, her eyes never leaving Yeosang's face. "You're yeosang" she states, her voice cold and calculated. "Sit down," she instructs, gesturing to the chair across from her. He moves to sit down carefully, maintaining eye contact with her while keeping his body language respectful. His usual charm falters slightly in the face of her stern presence. "I promise, I have the best intentions with your daughter."

Your mom raises an eyebrow skeptically as she leans forward, elbows resting on her knees. "that's for me to decide"

Shit yeosang thinks.

He takes a deep breath, leaning back slightly and offering what he hopes is a disarming smile. "Of course, ma'am. I wouldn't dream of imposing or presuming anything." He glances around the room, noting that there are no family pictures nor unnecessary decor. Noticing the notably stern air and lack of familial photographs surrounding him, yeosang's confidence dips even further. He shifts uncomfortably in his seat, suddenly wishing he had practiced this conversation in more depth. "I, uh... I truly care about her, ma'am."

"I understand that but what is it that you want?" Your mother asks him softly but with an underlying aggression.

He takes a deep breath, gathering his thoughts before speaking. "I mean, ma'am, that I have developed strong feelings for your daughter. I respect and admire her greatly, and I would like the opportunity to pursue a relationship with her, with your blessing and guidance."

Honestly, if you had popcorn, you'd be very entertained. Kinda well if you exclude the part that you might get your ass whooped after he leaves creating a big mess. But you hold your breath.

Your mother's expression remains unreadable, her eyes scrutinizing Yeosang intently. "You're asking for my permission to date my daughter?" She asks flatly, her tone leaving no room for misinterpretation.

he nods "yes ma'am"

She steeples her fingers, tapping her index fingers thoughtfully against her lips. "I see." She sits back in her chair, her eyes narrowing slightly. "Tell me, yeosang, how can I let my daughter be with you, if I don't know anything about your future, family. I don't want her to have a miserable life and for that you need to have a job"

"yes ma'am. That's why I have everything sorted out. Im good ataths and have dreams of persuing higher Education in it. if not I have intrest in becoming a professor. and if that fails as well, I have my father's company. but ofcourse, that is the last option"

Damn that was kinda hot. Wait, brain, wtf?

Your mother nods slowly, seeming to consider his words carefully. "A good education and a solid career path. Those are important things for a man to have." She pauses, her gaze drifting to the door for a moment before snapping back at him. "But tell me, yeosang"

"Are you prepared to handle the pressure and responsibilities that come with being in a relationship with my daughter? she has been severely depressed and suicidal for the past 8 years after her dad lost everything and committed suicide" Her voice is firm, leaving no room for argument.

You felt betrayed, by your own mother. You were shocked, hurt and mostly, sad that she exposed this. You were always reserved about your feelings, shutting them off from everybody. But hearing this made you felt exposed, naked almost

Yeosang's expression softens as he realizes the gravity of your situation. He leans forward earnestly, his eyes filled with sincerity and determination. "Ma'am, I understand completely. I know I'm asking for a big responsibility. But please believe me when I say that I'm ready to stand by your daughter through thick and thin. I have experience dealing with mental health issues, as my own aunt struggled with depression for years. I know it's not an easy path, but I'm committed to supporting and loving her unconditionally."

Your mother studies him intently, her hard exterior cracking slightly to reveal a glimmer of hope and relief in her eyes. "You're a good man, Yeosang. Most boys your age would run away screaming at the thought of dealing with something like this"

He shrugs and says something that made your eyes tear,

"I love her ma'am"

Your mother's expression softens further, a rare smile tugging at her lips. "I can see that you truly care for my daughter. That's the most important thing to me." She pauses, her mind made up. "You have my blessing to date my daughter, Yeosang."

AN: whooo I got this done guys clap in the comments. I hope y'all enjoyed this and if you did, please reblog so I can reach even more people. I love yalllll

[revelboo]

Im laughing so much rn. Somehow the starscram blokee came in first when it shipped way after megatron and shockwave. Did this boy really speedrun the mail system? 😭

Can't wait to put him together (on my tree)

Nice! I think TC and Skywarp are supposed to arrive today while I’m at work. I almost regret telling y’all about the figures, cause the price for singles on EBay went from about $13 each to $24 or more now. 🥲 JK- buy the Blokees so they release more characters

Even If It Kills Me Pt 9

Armada Starscream x Reader

• Servos cupping over you as kick out a leg, twisting in his grip to make Runway lift his head with a tired warble. How many times does this make this week alone? When you’ve struggled, fighting against a dream. Or a nightmare and he has no idea how to fix it. How to help, but those small sounds of pain go straight to his spark, make him remember his own tormentor. Because that must be what’s haunting you. Even if it’s over and you’re safe now, the fear is still there, probably always will be. Venting tiredly, he strokes a servo against your spine. Aware of his mini-cons all watching now, upset that you’re upset. And optics shuttering, he begins murmuring at you. Singing in his gruff voice an old Seeker lullaby about bright, endless skies.

• Curling into yourself as you startle awake, you’re aware of a low humming, of guttural, strange sounds and intonations. He’s singing. Afraid to move in case he stops, you relax and listen to him, hearing an aching longing there even though you can’t understand the words. That ache calls to you and you remember the way he’d looked at you when he’d sat on the floor with you and the mini-cons. Like he’d wanted something. Wondering now if he’d wanted you to join him. Sit with him and share a meal. Realizing, you want that even if you know better. Know that hoping for a place to belong can only hurt you.

• Singing faltering when you shift on top of him and he allows you to sit up, he looks down at you. “Please,” you say, those haunted eyes making his spark ache unexpectedly. “Please, don’t stop.” Watching you reach up and scrub at your eyes, he presses the tips of his servos against your spine, feeling the beat of your heart. And even though he knows his voice isn’t meant for this, isn’t soft and soothing, he sings for you and feels you twist slightly to curl yourself against his palm. So softly, he nearly misses it, you hum along to a song you can’t understand, your little voice lifting and becoming haunting. The song becoming about loss and hope, your voices twining together.

• When the song fades, he reaches up to touch your cheek, those big hands so gentle. “You should rest. I have you,” he says, tone gentle despite how gruff his voice is. And you want to believe him. Want to hope this can last, that you’re safe. That you won’t somehow ruin this, even if you don’t deserve to have this. Standing and slowly picking your way over his chassis, aware of his servos hovering to catch you if you stumble, he frowns at you. Laying a palm on his chin, you lean against his face to press a kiss against his cheek. See his optics widen slightly as though shocked that you’d done that.

• “You’re a sweetheart,” you say, smiling at him even though your expression is still so sad. Spark warming, he watches you make your way back to his chassis and lay down again. Draping his servos over you, he lays there listening until your breathing evens out before reaching up to touch his face where your soft mouth had brushed against him. Venting softly, he stares at the ceiling and thinks about broken things. If they can ever really be fixed or if those broken edges will always remain. If you’re both too broken to even begin trying to fix each other.

Previous

But I’m too tired to go to sleep tonight

And I’m too weak to follow dreams tonight

For the first time in a long time I can say

That I want to try to get better and

Overcome each moment

In my own way

I’m not saying that I’m giving up

I’m just trying not to think as much as I used to

Cause "never" is a lonely little messed up word

Maybe I’ll get it right some day

For the first time in a long time I can say

That I want to try

I feel helpless for the most part

But I’m learning to open my eyes

And the sad truth of the matter is

I’ll never get over it

But I’m gonna try

To get better and overcome each moment

In my own way

[zepskies]

Yeessss we love a refill. 😂

(LOLL girl no worries. You strike me as a fun drunk. Plus, the other night I had one strong glass of wine and that somehow did me in for the night. I guess that's what I get for trying a "Super Tuscan" red. 😂😂)

Aww you're amazing. Thank you so much, my friend!! 🥹 And best believe, I saw you released two parts of a new Russell story and they're already bookmarked in my TBR. 💖💖

Now, on to the rest of your lovely comments on the ESC finale!

Loved that little moment of jealousy there. How do you like tasting your own medicine, Russ? 😂

Right?! Lmao all that Reenie teasing coming to bite him in the ass.

I absolutely loved their pizza and movie date at home. And they already shared so much with each other 🥹 The fact he felt secure enough to open up to her after this short amount of time says a lot, considering Dory hasn't even told her the story yet. I love them 😭🤍

Aw I'm so glad you loved it! I felt like they needed something low-key that allowed them to reconnect and be there for each other after all the chaos. I debated if having Russ open up like this was too soon, but since she was so honest with him about her past trauma, I thought he would feel that kindred spirit connection, enough to be honest himself.

I haven't forgotten about the "oh, my brother thought I killed our dad" part of the story though. 😂😂 When I eventually write another story for this series, I want to incorporate that reveal somehow when we finally dive into Ashton Shaw in the show. (Maybe I'll read ahead in the books. 👀)

Honestly, in this day and age, it's always best to wait for renewed consent (even though I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have minded in the least lol). Loved that he recognized that and hesitated!

Right? 🙃 Exactly what I was thinking in having him hesitate, even though you're right, she would NOT have minded. 😂 I still thought that little moment of her pulling him down to join her was needed. 💜

Poor girl 😂💕 The morning after is always a tad awkward – especially if everything is still in the balance of will they/won't they and nothing *sexual* has happened yet 😅

LOL exactly. It's a bit of an odd situation all around, even though they've already shared some romantic moments. 😅💜

Absolutely adored this exchange! ❤️ Oooof, and that smut may have been my undoing for tonight! Holy hell!!! 😮‍💨🔥🌶️

Ahaha I had to research bullet sizes and everything. 😏❤️‍🔥

Honestly I'm really flattered you enjoyed the steamy parts, because I feel like smut writing is my weakest link, though I do my best. 😅😂 You write it so well, so that's an extra special compliment coming from you!

Again, she's so cute 😆🤍 I do hope they work something out. I don't think Russell would've necessarily taken the "big" step, knowing her feelings on this, if he hadn't planned to try and make it work somehow ❤️

Lolll she's trying her best to be slick! 😂 Yeah, I think Russell already knew his connection with her was different, and worth pursuing, he just wasn't sure about the reality of how it was going to work until this moment. 💜

Perfect ending, friend 🥹💚 (You know I love a bit of drama and angst in an ending lol) I loved this series so goddamn much! It fit so well with every character and gave so much that the show didn't (like that awesome family reunion of the three Shaws). Can't wait to get into the one-shots over the holidays 😍

Aww thank you! I wanted to be realistic with his lifestyle potentially posing a problem, but at the same time, both of them being willing to figure it out and try to make this work. 💕

I so appreciate you for saying that ESC felt authentic within the Tracker world, because that's something I always try to do, but it was challenging with this new show/world and how much we still don't know about the Shaw family. (But I HAD to include that reunion. 🥹)

I so hope you enjoy the little bonus one-shots whenever you get to them!!

Merry Christmas, my friend!!! I hope you and your family are having so much fun. ❤️❤️

Every Second Counts - Part 5

Pairing: Russell Shaw x F. Reader

Summary: One date with your best friend’s brother leaves you wanting more, even though his questionable job and vagabond lifestyle make you want to guard your heart. When your brother falls into trouble, however, Russell is the one you trust to help you find him. 

AN: I thought about breaking up this chapter into two parts, but for some reason it didn’t feel right. I hope you enjoy the finale! I think this is the moment we’ve all been waiting for…

Word Count: 7K

Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! Fluff, angst and hurt/comfort, ‘90s movie reference, mutual pining and tension, and a strong dose of smut.

💜 Series Masterlist

Part 5: “Damn Worth It”

You borrowed Russell’s cell to call Dory from the hospital. You let her know that Charlie was stable and resting, and that Russell was bringing you home.

You should’ve known that when you two got there, you wouldn’t have the kind of privacy you craved. Colter and Dory were waiting in his car, parked in your driveway. They met you in front of your house, where Dory pulled you into a big, swaying hug. She cried, you cried, and her brothers hung back to watch the warm scene.

Dory pulled back to get a better look at you. She hesitated to touch the bandage above your brow.

“God. Are you okay?” she asked.

“Yeah, I’m…I’m fine,” you sniffed, wiping at your face. “Come on, let’s go inside.”

Dory actually had your keys. After she handed them to you, you took in a steadying breath, and you unlocked your front door without incident this time. You invited everyone in.

Even though you told her not to, Dory began straightening up a bit for you. She had Russell take out the trash while she washed the dishes.

Meanwhile, you pulled Colter aside in the living room. You led him to sit with you on the couch.

“Can I at least give you $1,000?” you asked. It was all you had left in your savings, but the man had literally saved your brother's life, and yours as well. “I know it’s not much, compared to what your jobs usually get you—”

“Please,” Colter said. He touched your arm. “Don’t worry about it. I’m just glad you and Charlie are safe.”

You teared up all over again, but you gave him a smile and held his hand with both of yours.

“Thank you,” you said.

Russell happened to spot the cozy little scene from the doorway. He couldn’t help staring, and trying not to frown.

When Colter caught sight of his brother loitering (and that look on his face), Colter tried to hide most of his smile. He let go of your hand, patted your shoulder and stood. You followed him to the kitchen, where he went to check on Dory. Russell filtered in behind you both.

“Hey, wanna grab some lunch?” Colter asked his sister.

She gave him a raised brow. “Wow, my brother actually wants to hang out with me instead of rushing off to the next job?”

He gave her an amused look. “I’ve got some time.”

Dory was happy to hear that, but her expression dimmed when she turned to you.

“Would you want to go? Or do you need to rest?” she asked.

“Oh, I need to get cleaned up, and then sleep for about ten years,” you said. “But you go, D. Have fun.”

She frowned. “I don’t want to leave you here by yourself.”

“Well, she won’t be,” Russell chimed in. “I’m gonna hang out here for a bit, clean up and take little power nap myself.”

At that, Dory slowly smiled, both amused and suspicious. Her gaze slid back to you.

“Are you sure?” she asked. You read the double meaning laced in her tone.

“Yeah, definitely,” you said with a smile, and the beginnings of a warm blush. “You guys go ahead.”

There was a knowing gleam to her own smile, but Dory shrugged and gave you one last hug. She and Colter said their goodbyes to their older brother before they headed out. It left you alone in the house with Russell for the first time since this all began.

“Um, you can use the guest bathroom if you want to shower,” you told him. “Towels are under the sink, and feel free to borrow any of Charlie’s clothes if you need.”

“It’s okay, I’ve got a bag in the car with some stuff,” Russell said, tossing a thumb over his shoulder. “I take one wherever I go.”

“Smart,” you nodded. “Very prepared.”

A strange silence stretched between you two, until you couldn’t take it anymore.

“I’m just…gonna go clean up,” you said. “We can order some food after?”

“Yeah, sounds good,” he said. He was amused as he watched you scurry off, after giving him another smile over your shoulder.

Though he’d be lying if he said he didn’t feel a small trill of nerves himself. It brought him a little bounce in his step as he headed out to his car to grab his stuff.

By the time you were done showering and drying your hair, Russell had ordered a pizza (and a side of fries). You padded out into the living room in an old college shirt and pajama shorts. He tried not to linger his gaze on your smooth, bare legs. 

“Sorry, forgot to ask if you’d want something else to eat,” he said. 

“Pizza is perfect,” you said. At this point, after almost a full day without food, you’d eat sliced bread out of the bag. You gave him a teasing look. “I’d ask you if you wanted a beer, but I’m afraid it’s not up to your standard.”

“Well, that’s okay. I happen to have brought a sample for you, just like I promised,” he said, with that grin of his you’d come to expect.

He retrieved a case of homebrew from his car, but you had to add some ice cubes into a tall glass before you joined him back on the couch. You poured the contents of a bottle into the glass.

“Sorry, I know this is sacrilege, but I can’t drink warm beer,” you said.

“I can’t fault you, though I didn’t really peg you for a pizza and beer kind of girl,” he said. He tipped a swig of beer into his mouth, right from a lukewarm bottle. He was a purist.

You quirked a brow at him and took another bite of your pizza slice. 

“Why not?” you asked, after swallowing a mouthful of pepperoni and mushroom.

Russell shrugged. “Never mind. Forget I said anything.”

“No, no. I want to hear this,” you said. “What, because I teach college students?”

Russell looked over at you and leaned on his elbow, resting above his knee. 

“You’re a college professor with a handful of degrees,” he said. “I’ve got a GED and a give ‘em hell outlook on life.”

You shook your head at that. 

“We’re different. That’s not a bad thing,” you said. “And like my brother, you’ve fought for this country. You’ve saved lives, including mine. I’d say that’s pretty damn special.”

His head tilted at that. He didn’t want to remind you that, just like you saw today, he’d taken lives too. Perhaps just as many as he’d saved. You could debate the quality of those lives, but in the grand scheme of things, he knew what he was. A trained killer.

He rolled his shoulders, feeling a familiar weight.

You didn’t like the pensive look on his face, so you aimed to distract him.

“Want to watch a movie?” you suggested.

Russell inclined his head. “Sure. What you got?”

That was how the two of you ended up finishing the box of pizza and a case of beer while laughing at Tommy Boy, of all things—one of the best '90s buddy road trip comedies of all time. Apparently Russell had never seen it before, but you enjoyed watching him experience it for the first time. He had a deep, infectious laugh that made you laugh just by proximity. 

Later in the movie, the reluctant, unlikely duo of Tommy and Richard hit a deer, and tried to transport it in the car. Russell both laughed and cringed when the animal woke up and thoroughly wrecked the car from the inside. You noticed his reaction and nudged him in the arm. 

Russell held in a grunt of pain when you unintentionally hit his injured shoulder, bandaged underneath his gray henley. 

“What if that was the Chevelle,” you teased. 

He cast you a playfully chiding look. “Woman, don’t even joke.”

You laughed and squeezed his forearm in a friendly gesture. But he thought there was more than just friendliness when you shot him that little smile. He decided to take a chance. 

“Come ‘ere,” he said. He slid a hand around your waist and guided you closer until you came to lay against his side. You allowed yourself to rest against him, splaying your hand flat against the firm wall of his chest. Your heart tripped up faster, but you also relaxed more fully for the first time since you got home. You let out a long breath, and you used the remote to lower the volume on the movie a little.

“Do you think Charlie will be able to get past this?” you asked quietly. “Think he’ll be okay?”

Russell hummed as he thought back to his conversation with your brother in the hospital. Charlie was still young, but he seemed to realize what he’d done, and what he needed to change. He wouldn’t have volunteered himself for rehab if he hadn’t.

Russell brushed your arm with his thumb. “Well, I think he knows what he needs to do. If he’s anything like you, then he’ll be all right.”

Your mouth tugged upward, though you considered his words with a sigh.

“He hasn’t had it easy,” you said. “He was barely eighteen when our parents died. Suddenly he had to be an adult. In fact, he almost didn’t finish high school. Had to take care of the funeral, had to get a job, had to take care of me…and I didn’t always make it easy on him.”

Russell’s lips curved in light of your faint smile. Then, your expression dimmed.

“He pulled me out of the car,” you admitted. Russell looked down at you.

“You all were there?” he asked. 

“My dad was driving. We’d just gone out to dinner as a family,” you said.

You hesitated as the scenes once again filtered through your mind. Some things were hazy. Others, you could see with perfect clarity. You remembered how your parents argued about the best way to get home while the pouring rain beat down overhead, half-drowning out their voices.

You remembered what the flash of a red stoplight looked like through the car window, with streams of water coming down, and a dead leaf stuck to the glass.

You remembered the sound of horns blaring in your ears, the crunch of metal on metal. Your mother’s scream. The feeling of being suspended, and then ricocheted painfully through time and space.

Then the smell of exhaust, and the metallic tang of blood.

“We were heading through a terrible storm,” you said, after letting out a long breath through your nose. “By the end of the night, it was just me and Charlie in the hospital.”

He’d broken his arm, but thanks to him, the only thing you really walked away with were a few cuts and bruises, and the memories of that day. They were like old scars, painful and tender at the touch.

Russell shook his head, his brows knitting together. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah,” you breathed. “And I’m sorry too. I know you understand what it’s like to lose a parent.”

The movie played on as that new weight settled between you. Russell fell into his own thoughts as he continued to rub your arm in comfort. His own past wasn’t like yours, but he did understand some of your pain.

“How much did Dory tell you about how we grew up?” he asked.

You shifted a bit, so you could see his face too.

“I know your dad took you all to a cabin in some sort of compound in the woods, when you all were still pretty young.”

“He taught us to live off the land. Drilled us, really,” Russell explained, noting your raised brows. “Yeah, he was…well, a paranoid bastard, to be frank. We still don’t know all of why, and what drove him to move us out there.”

“Dory said he was…eccentric,” you said. Russell snorted.

“He was a piece of fucking work,” he said. “Half the time I hated him, if I’m honest.”

That part was hard to admit, even if it was true. Your hand soothed across his chest, more comforting as you listened. Russell’s lips quirked. He liked that about you, that you were willing to listen without judging him, or his family. Maybe that was another reason Dory seemed to love you so much.

“But one night, it was like he snapped,” he said.

For a moment, he was lost in the memory. His father’s anger, and the damn crazy look in his eyes. 

“What happened?” you asked quietly.

Russell glanced at you again. “I don’t think you wanna hear this right now.”

You shook your head. “No, I do.”

He hesitated, but that earnest look in your eyes got him. Still, he surprised himself when he actually told you. He explained it the best he could, the way he saw it in his mind’s eye.

Their mom had been missing, hadn’t come home yet. Then his dad had torn around the house like a man possessed, until he told them it was time to leave for their own safety. Dory had been scared, especially when he grabbed her, yelled at her.

That was the one thing Russell couldn’t tolerate. So he snapped, yanking the older man back and shoving him away. It was one of the first times Russell had ever defied his father.

Ashton Shaw left them then, heading out into the night and the rain. Maybe he’d realized what he was doing to his own kids, his own family.

Colter wanted to follow after him, but Russell stopped him. Being the eldest, he took on the responsibility, even if he’d been reluctant. We’re better off without him…

He was barely sixteen at the time, but Russell knew he’d seen his father arguing with someone—a man he’d seen before, talking with his mother. And then…

“I watched him die that night,” Russell said.

Your hand clenched in his shirt, reminding him that you were still in his arms, still listening. He remembered that scene, looking over the cliff to find his father’s broken body down below. 

“He fell, and I couldn’t stop it,” he said. “And to this day, I still don’t know what all that was about.”

He’d been reluctant to tell even Colter that it still haunted him sometimes; that night, and the not knowing.

You pulled yourself up further so you could meet Russell’s gaze.

“I’m so sorry,” you said.

The movie had long faded into the background, but at least it gave some white noise for the next heavy beat that passed between you two. His eyes eventually fell away from yours.

“It’s old history,” Russell said at last.

“It’s not just history,” you denied softly. “It’s your life.”

He didn’t know what to say to that, so he just hummed in agreement. He encouraged you to relax against him again, with a warm hand on your back. You settled and released another contented sigh. Even though Russell’s story weighed on your heart, you did feel closer to him. It made you feel like you understood Dory better too, and even Colter.

Russell rubbed your arm. “You doin’ okay? You’ve had a long day.”

“Day and night,” you agreed. Your eyes closed against your will. “But, yeah…I think I’m okay now.”

At that, he smiled. He laid a kiss on your forehead.

“Good,” he said.

A few minutes later, Russell heard your soft, deeper breaths in sleep. He chanced grabbing a throw blanket laid over the back of the couch. He managed to toss it over your body, but he made sure it covered you. You shifted in your sleep and curled up more comfortably against him. 

Russell smiled down on you fondly. He’d learned a hell of a lot more about you in just the past couple of days, but ever since he met you, he’d been picking up on the important things. The things that made you the woman you were.

And he wanted more, he realized. He wanted more time with you.

That turned out to be the last real thought he had before his eyes closed on him too. 

Russell didn’t wake again until the credits on the movie were rolling near the end. You were still knocked out. So he carried you, blanket and all, over to your bedroom.

He smelled the remnants of your floral shampoo and body wash in the air, likely coming from the bathroom. It was an intoxicating mix, one that had infiltrated his nose ever since you came out of the shower today. 

It was only 6:00 p.m., but it might as well have been midnight. He laid you down toward the middle of the bed. There was still space on the other side. Very tempting.

She did offer, he thought, remembering what you’d said at the hospital. And yet, he hesitated.

Before he could make a decision, you made it for him. Your hand reached out to hook in his shirt. 

Russell looked down at your sleepy smile. 

“Get over here,” you said, tugging him downward. He chuckled and wrapped his hand around yours. He allowed you to guide him over, and he somehow managed to roll onto the other side of the bed without crushing you. 

“Reflexes like a cat, I tell ya,” he quipped.

You giggled softly. He took off his first layer of defense (his pants), leaving him in his henley and boxer briefs. He settled into bed behind you and slipped an arm around your waist. He fit in snug against your back.

“Mmm,” he sighed. His lips pressed behind your ear, smiling there. “Feels nice.” 

“Mhmm,” you agreed.

He couldn’t see your smile, but you held his arm in place. For the first time in a while, you weren’t alone.

In the early morning, you woke up to warmth and closeness. The man in your bed snored lightly, mouth parted in sleep while he faced you. You smiled.

How could a man who felt dangerous, in more ways than one, also make you feel safe? It was a wonder. Though when an idea hit you, you carefully slid out of bed.

Russell eventually roused in his own time. He blinked awake, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He stretched out his limbs in your very comfortable bed. This sure beat rusty motel springs.

He realized that he was alone in the room, but he heard you puttering around the house. He allowed himself to doze some more.

A few minutes later, you returned to greet him with a couple of mugs, drawing him back into the waking world with the rich smell of coffee.

“Aww yeah, that’s the stuff,” he said. He groaned as he slowly sat up.

You laughed and sat beside him on the edge of the bed. “Good morning.”

“Morning,” he said. His voice was deeper and rougher with sleep, washing down your spine pleasantly.

He accepted the mug you offered him. He took a sip and hummed in pleasure at its bold flavor. It wasn’t as sweet as he usually liked it, but it was exactly what he needed right now.

“I just did a little sugar and creamer. That okay?” you asked. 

“It’s good,” he nodded. And you looked good, he noticed, with your bed-tousled hair and an open robe over your tank top and little shorts.  

“Do you want to meet Dory and Colter for breakfast?” you asked. “Dory texted me this morning.”

Russell’s brows shot up. 

“Colt stuck around?” he asked.

“Yeah, Dory asked him to stay at her place last night,” you said. Russell hummed in response. 

A bit of an awkward lull fell between you. You’d felt bolder yesterday in the hospital, but now, you weren’t entirely sure what you were doing with a man who just slept somewhat-but-not-altogether platonically in your bed.

“Um, I’ll just…get ready then,” you said, pointing to the bathroom. “You…take your time.”

He cleared his throat. “Uh, yeah.”

He peeled back the covers and climbed out of your bed, away from the sheets that smelled like you. 

You watched him go when he headed across the hall back to Charlie’s room. You sighed and beat your hand against your own forehead in frustration. What the hell am I doing?

You’d literally invited him into your bed last night, but he hadn’t done anything more than hold you while you slept. It was incredibly kind, and it said a lot about him, despite his rough-around-the-edges exterior. You were just a little disappointed that he’d been a perfect gentleman about it all. 

You rolled your eyes at yourself. What did that say about you?

You shook your head and resolved to freshen up. There was still a cut that the ER nurse covered with a butterfly bandage above your brow. You cleaned it up and applied a new bandage. Then you put on some makeup to cover the ugly bruise on your cheek and the dark circles that lingered under your eyes.

God, look at me. You actually wouldn’t blame Russell for not being into you enough to make a move. 

A bit disheartened, you changed out of your pajamas to slip on a nice, but comfortable dress over your bra and underwear. Afterward, you paused to stare at yourself in the mirror for a moment. What exactly do you want here?

“Hey, uh—” Russell’s voice startled you, making you flinch. Maybe you were still jumpy.

He raised an apologetic hand. “Sorry. Just thought I’d ask if you want some toast or something. I don’t think my stomach can wait ‘til we meet up with Dory.”

You smiled faintly. “Sure, go ahead. Whatever’s there, you’re welcome to.”

Russell paused, tilting his head. There was something off with you. He saw it, and felt it. 

“Hey, you okay?” he asked. 

“Yeah,” you said, glancing away. 

Russell’s spidey senses began to tingle. He approached you and laid a hand on the counter, inches from yours. 

“You sure?” he said. He took in your hesitant face, then the pretty dress you had on. The color matched your eyes. Soulful eyes.

He smiled when you let him see them again.

“Can you see the bruises? I think I covered them up well enough,” you said. You turned to look at yourself in the mirror again, touching your jaw carefully. 

Russell’s hand raised to find your cheek, earning your attention with wider eyes. His thumb swept across your skin as you started to blush.

“You’re beautiful,” he said with a smile. “Don’t you worry about that.”

Your face warmed further, despite your smile. 

“Yeah, the makeup helps,” you quipped. 

“I didn’t say anything about makeup,” he replied. Though he grinned and made a show of looking closer at your face. “Although, have your lashes always been that damn long?”

You laughed, but he didn’t let go of you. Instead, his hand drifted down to your neck, cradling your jaw. His thumb brushed over your lower lip this time, smudging your lipstick a little. Your eyes met his, but they’d already lowered, to the path of his hand. You were tempted to nip at his thumb, or better yet, suck it into your mouth.

Perhaps he read the thought crossing your face. Because when those darkened eyes flicked up to yours, he finally bowed his head to kiss you.

You took in a deep breath, and you melted into his mouth with a moan of wanting. A craving from the depths of your heart, finally being fulfilled.

You didn’t let yourself think anymore. You gripped the front of his shirt and pulled him closer. He cupped the back of your head, tangling his fingers into your hair as he deepened the kiss. His tongue invaded your mouth, and you let him in. You met his every kiss with the same fervor, claiming him right back, demanding just as much.

Your hands slid up his chest and helped him shrug off the green jacket first, then his shirt (Led Zeppelin this time). He hooked an arm around your waist and brought you flush against him, so he could turn you around and walk you back to the bed. 

You clung to his bare shoulders and savored the feeling of his warm, calloused hands burning up your thighs and ass, bunching the skirt of your dress. You helped him get it over your head and toss it onto the floor along with his clothes. 

As he held you by the waist, his gaze dipped for a moment to take you in, from bare thighs and hips and lacy panties, all the way up to your breasts cupped in your bra. Through panting breaths, you smiled and blushed at the heated depths of his green eyes. You felt like your heart was beating in and out of rhythm.  

But you managed to get a hold of your nerves long enough to drag your hands down his chest, down to his belt. You unclipped it for him and took your time in sliding the entire belt out of its loops. Then you let the brown leather fall to the floor. 

Russell raised a brow at you, smiling. Taking your challenge for what it was, he unbuttoned his jeans himself and aimed to step out of them, but he had some trouble when one of the pant legs got caught around his ankle and sock-covered foot.

“Shit,” he muttered as he stumbled a little. “Hold on.”

Unable to help a small giggle, you grabbed his left arm to help steady him. He hissed in pain, but he cleared his throat to cover it. You gasped as you realized what you’d done. You noticed then that he had a bandage tightly wrapped above his elbow, right below one of his tattoos.

“What’s this?” you asked in concern. You held his arm with both hands. “Did you get shot? Did you get this looked at when we were at the hospital?”

Russell staved off your questions with a gentle hand on your shoulder.

“It’s okay. This is old, just still healing up,” he said. 

You frowned up at him. “You got stabbed, shot, what? When did this happen? I thought you worked in private security.”

“A couple months ago. I got, uh, grazed. Don’t worry about it,” he said. “Sometimes the job gets a bit dicey.”

He could tell though, that you weren’t going to let it go easily. 

“Let me see,” you said, trying to peek under the bandage. Russell laughed and gathered you into his arms to stop your attempts. Your concern warmed him, but it wasn’t necessary. 

“I’m fine, sweetheart. I promise. Can we focus on the fun part, here?” he said.

Your brows furrowed. You opened your mouth to reply, but Russell saw the testiness in your eyes. He dipped down to kiss you, swallowing whatever snippy remark you were about to make.

You weren’t the only one giving into a craving here. Russell’s was bone-deep, molten in his blood, and getting to see you, to feel your soft body under his hands was already so much better than he’d imagined. His hold tightened on your waist, his fingers pressing into your skin.

A shudder ran up your spine at his touch. You circled your arms around his neck and let him continue ravishing you, then laying you down onto the bed. 

While you were careful about avoiding the bandage, your hand did drift down his arm, and further still, to palm at the straining bulge pressing against you. And Jesus Christ, did it feel generous. He grunted at your touch and paused with his lips against your jaw. 

“Well hey there, cowboy,” you said, adopting a more sensuous tone. “I had a feeling you’d be packing. What’s that, a .45, or a 38 Special?”

Russell’s eyes blinked wide. Then he erupted with deep laughter that made his shoulders shake. Aside from throwing a punch, your brother must’ve taught you something about guns too. 

“Well thank you, kindly,” Russell said, putting on a bit of a southern drawl, just to tease you. “But you’re about to find out, naughty girl.”

You giggled as he began to kiss your neck, languid and sloppy. He blazed a wet trail down the column of your throat and between your breasts. His beard rasping against your skin made you shudder a little, but it wasn’t unpleasant. In fact, you quite liked that a lot.

He slipped a hand underneath you to unclip the black lace. You arched into him so he had easier access. 

He slid the bra from your body and tossed it somewhere behind him. Just as he’d imagined, you had beautiful tits. His lips explored each of them in turn, squeezing supple flesh and rolling your sensitive, hardened nipples with his tongue and fingers. 

It was a prequel, you thought, for what talents that mouth might have further down. You had to moan just at the idea, your fingers clenching in his hair, but also at the sensations he was drawing from your body wherever he touched. The man clearly knew what he was doing.

He traveled lower still and laid slow, occasionally nipping kisses across your stomach, hips and thighs. His fingers hooked around your panties and lowered them down your legs. You felt his warm breath panting against your thigh. You glanced down at him and tensed in anticipation. 

“Still good?” he checked, squeezing your hip. You smiled and reached for his hand. Russell gave it to you, brushing his thumb over the back of your hand in affection. 

“I think I’m about to be,” you said cheekily.

He smirked. His other hand smoothed up the inside of your thigh and slipped past your folds, finding wetness that already coated his digits.

“Goddamn. You’re soaked,” he said, just a hint teasing. “Bet if I put my mouth on you, you’d fuckin’ drown me.”

Again, he stopped whatever smart quip you were about to levy at him next when his fingers found your clit. You let out a gasping moan instead.

He decided that he already loved that sound. He endeavored to pull it from you, again and again when he began working you open with his fingers and pumping them inside you. He enjoyed seeing you writhe and arch against his hand. Your hands squeezed his arms, his shoulders, trying to anchor yourself.  

His thumb circled and strummed your clit in a rhythm only he could hear in his head, until you couldn’t help biting your nails into his shoulders when you came. You shuddered your release as your core throbbed with warmth and slick around his fingers. 

“Fuck, that’s my girl,” he said. His voice rasped deep with arousal. “Wouldn’t even mind if you did drown me.” 

You huffed in response, unable to form speech just now.

Next time, Russell thought. He slipped his fingers out of you and licked them clean, making your eyes widen. He smirked and stroked your thigh as you came down, a shuddering mess.

After taking a second to regain your breath, you pulled him down for a kiss, both grateful and fueled by a passion you couldn’t put into words. What you felt for this man was instinctual, from the moment you saw him. And yet, it was also so much more. It was raw, and real, and maybe even beautiful.

The thought spurred you on as your hands moved with purpose down his body. Your nails caught at the waistband of his boxer briefs as you tried to roll them down. You got it halfway down his thighs, enough to let his hardened length spring free. You bit your lip at the mere sight of him. Goddamn.

Your hand slid around his cock, near its weeping head. You used the beads of wetness there to work your way smoothly down to its base. Russell’s body tensed above you, just before he groaned low in pleasure.    

You pushed at his chest to have him let you up. 

“Your turn, baby,” you said. It would be one hell of a challenge to get your mouth down that beautiful 44 Magnum, but you were more than willing to try.

To your surprise, Russell shook his head and guided you back down.

“Let’s pin that one for next time too. Wanna be inside you already,” he said.

You blinked, but then you nodded in breathless agreement. He kissed you deeply, devouring you with his teeth grazing your bottom lip. His tongue soon slipped out to soothe it.   

“Condom?” he panted, between kisses. 

“Oh, yeah. Um…bathroom, bottom drawer,” you whispered, though you weren’t sure why you were whispering. 

“Okay, two seconds,” he said.

He left you in the bed, quite literally hot and bothered, and very naked. You crossed your arms over your breasts on reflex while you tried to recover. Your core was still tingling, and your heart was beating fast, though you couldn’t stamp out the smile forming on your face. 

You heard the sound of foil unwrapping and clothed rustling. When he came back to the bedroom, you finally got a full picture of what you were in for. You unconsciously licked your lips as your gaze dipped down his body, and the indeed impressive package at full mast, and full display. 

A grin curved his lips when he caught you staring. He climbed back onto the bed with just a bit of struggle with all the blankets coiled about. He pushed a heavy blanket out of his way, accidentally shoving it to the floor.

“Back to business,” he said.

“Oh, yeah,” you agreed, and you welcomed him back, sliding your hands up his arms and shoulders. You hooked your thigh around his hip as he found his way back between your legs. Holding his bearded face in your hands, you pulled him in for another kiss that reignited you both. 

He sunk his hand into your hair and treated you to another slow, deep kiss. Until your thigh tightening around his hip urged him to satisfy what you both had been wanting and waiting for.

He grabbed your thighs and angled you higher. Then he lined himself up at your entrance. Looking into your eyes, your breaths mingling together, he sheathed himself a little at a time. A keening moan fell from your lips.

He started with shallow thrusts, giving you time to adjust. But that in itself was a torturous tease. It made the coil in your lower belly start to tighten again. Pleasure began to thrum inside you, ever slowly. Your head tipped back into the pillows with a gasp.  

“God, Russell, please,” you uttered. You squeezed his arms on reflex, your heels digging into his ass. 

“I know, baby. Gonna fucking wreck you, I promise,” he said with a grin. 

You huffed in amusement. That was a hefty promise.

Though a moan tore from your throat when he finally bottomed out, stretching your inner walls. He groaned along with you. His lips fastened to your neck as he gave you deeper thrusts.

“You feel so good,” you said raggedly in his ear, raking your fingers through his hair. You felt every damn inch of him.

“You too, baby. So damn good,” he gritted out. “Tell me what you want.”

He raised your thigh a bit higher, his fingers pressing into flesh.

“Ugh, fuck,” you gasped, as he hit a particularly delicious angle. “Whatever you want to give me.”

“You sure about that?” Russell asked, panting against your neck. Your nails dragged down his back between the muscles in his shoulders, hard enough to earn a halting groan from him.

You nodded emphatically. “Yes!”

His lips hinted at a smile. “Okay, hold on."

Before you could even respond, he pulled out of you all the way, just so he could guide you over onto your stomach. He pulled you up onto your hands and knees. As he ran a hand down the gentle slope of your back and around the curve of your ass, you breathed harder in anticipation.

“So damn beautiful,” he muttered.

You glanced at him over your shoulder. You unconsciously bit your lip as your heart couldn’t help but swell at his words. Russell met you with a look that betrayed his desire, making your lower belly tremble as well.

He parted your cheeks and slotted himself between your thighs from behind. You once again felt the head of his cock nudging at your entrance, and then pushing back in with one deep plunge. Both of you let out moans of relief at the feeling.  

Pretty soon, he was pounding into you deeper and faster than before. Oh, fuck yes…

You clawed at the headboard, trying to find something to keep you stable. Russell’s arm slid around you for a solid support. You held onto him right back with one hand while he continued to drive into you, earning each and every sound coming out of your mouth. He’d finally angled you just right, so he could hit that special spot inside you with every thrust. Your pussy clenched on him in response, making him grunt in pleasure. 

“Fuck, you’re close. I can fuckin’ feel it,” he said, panting. He laid a biting kiss where your neck met your shoulder. You cried out in both pain and pleasure, your inner walls once again squeezing on him. 

“Yeah,” you nodded, breathless. “This time, you’re gonna come with me.”

You reached back and tangled your fingers into his hair. He held you to his chest and squeezed your breast a bit roughly. You uttered a wanton sound. You dragged his hand down your body to part your folds. You used his fingers to press against your clit. 

He picked up your hint, and then took control, massaging you with his fingers. There you began to tremble from the inside out. Warmth emanated from your core and spread outward, down to your toes as you came even harder on his cock. 

Russell wasn’t far behind. His voice joined yours as his body locked up, and he spilled hot into the condom. You almost wished he’d come freely inside you, so you could really feel him. Regardless, your body was boneless when he lowered you down onto the bed afterward.

“Holy shit,” you breathed.

He chuckled and kissed your shoulder, before he fully pulled out. Panting for breath though you both were, you managed to twist onto your side and reach a hand for his cheek. Your fingers slipped higher from there, cupping the back of his neck. Your thumb swept tenderly across his cheek, and you guided him down for a proper kiss.

Russell obliged you, his lips meeting yours plush and wet. He brushed strands of your sweaty hair away from your forehead with affection.

Somehow, that last kiss was softer than all the rest.

One thing was for sure though. There was no way you two were making it to breakfast. 

“I kind of feel bad now,” you later confessed. 

You and Russell were taking a few minutes just to recover under the messy sheets. He held you while sitting up against your headboard. He almost craved a smoke. You’d given him a damn workout. 

He smirked at the thought. Admittedly, his mind was more on focused on the scenes replaying in his head than on what you were saying. 

“Dory doesn’t get to see you guys that often,” you continued, “and who knows how long Colter will seriously wait for us to get out of bed.”

Russell’s attention drifted back to you at that.

“Come on, it’s not like they know why we’re running late,” he said. You gave him a knowing look. 

“Are you kidding? They were already suspicious when you brought me home yesterday,” you replied with a laugh. 

Russell grinned and rubbed your arm. He knew you were probably right, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. 

“Yeah, well. That was damn worth it,” he said.

You smiled. You rolled your head over on his shoulder, so you could see his face, but you became contemplative as uncertainty crept in. You let in a breath to gather your courage, and you decided to take a chance. 

“You know, drug dealers aside, Laramie isn’t such a bad place to live,” you pointed out. “We’ve got a movie theater, a couple good outlet malls, a new Tex-Mex restaurant that just opened down the street. I’m gonna have to find a new bar though.”

Russell smiled at you. He knew what you were suggesting.

He sighed as his amusement faded. 

“Look, even if I stay…” he hesitated.

He looked into your eyes and saw the vulnerability there. You were being honest with him, putting your heart into his hands. The least he could do was be honest. He covered your hand where it rested on his chest.

“If I’m on a job, I could be gone weeks at a time. I won’t be able to tell you where I am or what I’m doing. That’s gonna be hard on you,” he said. 

He knew his friend Doug made it work with his wife, but their relationship wasn’t without friction because of the job he and Russell shared.

“I can handle it,” you said firmly. 

“You just had a little freak out over a scratch earlier,” Russell pointed out, with a gesturing hand at his bandaged arm. 

“Okay, that’s different,” you said.

You wouldn’t say it now, but there were things that still concerned you about his job. You had a strong feeling that "private security" wasn’t all it entailed. However, after what he’d done for you, after what he’d done for Charlie, you knew that Russell Shaw was a good man.

There was something good here, and you didn’t want to lose it this time. You shifted in his arms, so you could face him.

“Look, we can sit down and figure all that out,” you said. “But do you want to at least try? Or…am I reading this wrong?”

Russell stared back at you ruefully. He raised a hand to touch your cheek, grazing your soft skin with his fingers. 

“No, you’re not,” he said. 

In fact, what he felt already ran deeper with you than he’d like to admit. He let out a long breath through his nose. 

“Okay,” he said at last. “If we’re gonna do this, let’s do it right, I guess. I’ll book a motel here in town for now. If things go well, I can…I don’t know, find an apartment.”

Your answering smile broke him down further, even as it warmed him inside. You turned over to circle your arms around his neck, and as an added bonus, pressing your bare breasts against his chest. You kissed his cheek with a happy hum. He laughed at your enthusiasm. He also accepted your sweet path of kisses that led to his lips. 

He groaned when it became not so sweet, with your tongue slipping hotly against his. His hold on your hips tightened.

“Uh oh. Baby, we can’t do this now,” he chuckled, even though your hand was already wandering down his body and under the sheets. You both were supposed to be getting ready to meet his brother and sister for lunch. 

“Five minutes,” you said against his lips. All the while, you were pushing him back onto the bed. You began to kiss down his chest, and lower still.   

Russell snorted. Right. 

But he wasn’t about to argue with you. He had a gut feeling…one that made him almost certain.

He’d found where he wanted to be. 

AN: Well, then! I hope you enjoyed the "happy ending." 😘 I always get a bit sad at the end of a series, but thank you to everyone who's followed the ride on Every Second Counts. Let me know what you thought of how it all shook out here at the end between her and Russell! 💜

Read the Sequel:

Want more ESC? Read the next one-shot, Lost Time (18+):

Summary: When Russell takes longer than usual on a job out of town, you realize how hard it is to live half a life with him.

▶️ Keep Reading: Lost Time

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[bubblegumgothglados]

Aftercare should generally involve the opposite of the things a scene involved, it should balance the "negative" physical and psychological impact of the scene.

This is a fairly neat summation and simplification of a very complex and nuanced topic. But it's a good place to start if you're new and don't quite understand the concept of aftercare or if you're experienced and trying a new type of play. It's a simple framework to build upon as you learn more about your individual needs and the needs of your play partner(s).

So what are the physical and psychological impacts of a scene. (Do note we're specifically talking about those impacts we don't want to last past the end of a scene, puppies don't want to be told they're not puppies as aftercare)

I'm not going to separate these because what effects you psychologically is also going to effect you physically and vice versa. These things are not separate.

A good example on the more psychological side might be degradation which damages a submissive's self worth, self image, ego, etc. To balance this aftercare should focus on affirmation and rebuilding /healing those things. Similarly fear play damages a submissive's sense of safety/ wellbeing, aftercare for which should involve being made to feel safe, comfortable with their dominant, and st ease.

Having said that, a good example of this balance on the more physical side is replacing lost energy. Basically no matter what type if play you're engaging in you will burn a lot of energy, so to balance that you should replace that energy. I write about this in much more detail HERE.

Getting a little more complicated; sub drop. Coming 'down' from a submissive headspace, especially one that includes pain play, can be very unpleasant. The neurotransmitters released during a scene fade away, this feels something like the crash after an adrenaline spike, and can leave a submissive feeling lethargic, empty, sad, etc. To balance this aftercare should involve things the submissive enjoys to bring those neurotransmitter levels back up a little and alleviate some of the withdrawal symptoms. This can include but shouldn't be limited to; cuddles, kisses, warm snugly things like blankets and stuffies, their favourite snacks, their favourite movie or TV show, etc

"Top drop" is less a neurological thing and more of a social thing. Although the top headspace also includes it's own share of neurotransmitters which also drop off it's almost always to a much lesser extent. The most common major effect of top drop is guilt; hurting someone you care about is something deeply ingrained as bad and even if they like it, even if they're begging for it, it can still effect you really deeply. Aftercare for this should involve affirmation that the bottom isn't hurt beyond what they want to be, that they still care about and trust their dom, etc.

This is an infinitely nuanced topic, I could write until the character limit and still not cover all the ways that aftercare could go. But I have to draw a line in the sand somewhere so let me make one final point. Don't worry too much about getting this perfectly right the first few times, you'll figure out what you need and what your play partner(s) need. The most important part is the "care" half of "aftercare" show them you're willing yo put in the effort to make sure they're OK and you can't go to wrong

[hiiraya]

loml

pairing: natasha romanoff  x reader 

words: ~3.3k

warnings: angst, happy ending (?), literally just self-indulgent writing, messy writing, listen to loml by taylor swift to get in the sad mood

a/n: merry christmas everyone! the last thing I posted was january of 2022 and it's literally about to be 2025 - I've been in a reminiscing mood lately and this was something I've had in the drafts for months, I figured I should just release it to get it out of my system. your girl has been missing someone bad bro and the urge to tag them in this is insane ♡ anyways, hope they see this lmao

“Have a safe flight and text me when you land, yeah?”

“I will, I will. Get home safe and update me as well, okay?”

You release your cousin from your hold, giving their shoulder a quick squeeze as they pull away. You do a last minute check with them to make sure they hadn’t forgotten anything important - something you were always prone to do when travelling by yourself. The memory of you almost missing your international flight because you had rushed home and back to the airport within record speed, all because you had forgotten your passport of all things. 

“I’ll fly out to see you next time, so you can show me around.” You smile.

“Are you guys serious? I told you to leave early so that this exact thing wouldn’t happen!”

Your eyebrows immediately furrow at the familiar voice, catching one last glance of your cousin as they enter the security screening area, waving to them while you mouth one last ‘text me when you land!’ as they leave your sight, before turning around to find the source of the voice.

No way it’s her, you thought. What’s she doing here?

As you get closer to the arrivals board, your questions are answered. Standing there in all her glory, is the one woman you never thought you’d lay your eyes on again.

“Natasha?”

You see the puzzled look on her face as she registers your voice before she even lays her eyes on you. Watching as the confusion turns to irritation - whether it was towards you or whoever was on the other side of the phone, you couldn’t tell (most likely both) - you watch as a deep sigh she releases as she glances at the board in front of her once again.

“-that’s another 10 hours before you guys even land.” She sighs, exasperation lacing her voice.

“Hey, listen if you need help-”

She holds a finger up to silence you, eyes meeting yours in a piercing glance. “I don’t need help, and especially not from you Y/N L/N.”

At her words, you look down, the sight of your shoes a welcome one as you take a second to recover. Honestly, you thought to yourself, I deserved that. 

“Yes, it’s Y/N- no I did not! I swear I didn’t know that they were here.” You hear her mutter from beside you. Deciding to save the both of you from further embarrassment, you turn your attention elsewhere, wondering what your cousin would say once you eventually tell them about who you ran into immediately after they left.

You lift your head back up when you hear Natasha mumble "you guys pick the day before Christmas of all days to be late for your flight” followed by a quick goodbye before hanging up the phone, watching her scope the airport for her next step. 

You could just leave and pretend this ever happened.

“Come on, Nat, I promise I just want to help.” You find yourself saying instead. “I can take you to your hotel when they get here.”

Well, there's no going back from that now.

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Are you seriously asking me that right now?”

You really needed to stop opening your mouth.

“Okay, you know what, I deserve that.” You pause. “Listen, I’m not going to force you to come with me, but the offer is still there if you want it. You’ll get a free ride, plus you can use my apartment to rest and freshen up while you wait.”

 -x-

"I can't believe you talked me into this."

You spare a glance to Natasha, who was currently sitting in your passenger seat.

"You're the one that followed me to the car?"

She rolls her eyes at your confused tone, choosing to ignore what you said and instead checking her phone - most likely waiting for an update from whoever she was speaking to on the phone before. "I can't believe they missed their flight."

"Who's they?"

"Yelena, Maria, Wanda," she answers. "Oh, and Yelena's friend Kate too. I don't think you've met her."

You bit the inside of your cheek, because you already know that you didn't get to meet anyone named Kate while you were still together. You honestly didn't get to meet many of Natasha's friends whenever visited her - it was something you always fought over. It felt like she was ashamed of you, always wanting to keep you hidden, a secret she never planned on sharing with the world.

You refrain from asking any follow up questions - if Natasha wanted you to know more she would tell you.

Instead, you ask: "Did they manage to catch the next flight out?"

She nods. "I'm honestly surprised they did, considering how expensive it probably would've been. But knowing Maria, she probably would've pulled some strings to make it work."

Natasha finally looks up from her phone as you come to a stop, looking at the building you had just parked in front of.

"Where are we?"

"My apartment, I figured we could drop off your bags and you can freshen up before I show you around." You open the door for Natasha before moving to grab her bags from the trunk.

You lead her inside, setting her bags down in the living room before turning around to face Natasha - holding your arms out as you gesture to your living space. It's the first time she's ever stepped foot into this place, having only seen it through a phone screen since you were the one who would fly out to visit her when you were still together.

"I'll grab you some towels so you can freshen up, but make yourself at home." You say, gesturing for her to follow you down a hallway. "The bathroom is the first door to your left, there should be a spare toothbrush under the sink- wait did I give to my cousin? Well, we can grab you one while we're out but everything you need should be here."

You know you're rambling but you don't stop in fear of saying something stupid (which knowing you, is highly likely).

"If you want to take a nap, the guest room is just a little further down the hall on the right - I just changed the sheets so everything should be fresh."

It's not the way you wanted to be showing Natasha around your home for the first time, but you'll take what you can get. It'd be so easy to waltz back to the way things were, before everything fell apart but you didn't have the right to that anymore. You weren't a part of her life anymore.

You didn't know if she already had someone new in her life, maybe you were overstepping in so many ways and that it was best to just keep your distance. After all, you did promise that you just wanted to help. You were here to keep her company until the girls arrived and take her to the hotel when they finally did get here.

You know it's for the better to just move on, that after today she'll be gone and it'll be like she never made a reappearance in your life. But how could you when you know deep down that you still haven't fully moved on and that she'll always hold your heart in her hands?

Natasha's voice cuts off your reverie, bringing you back to the present as you hand her the towels.

"Give me an hour to shower and rest my feet for a bit, I wanna go out and explore while we wait."

 -x-

"Do you see that one over there? That's a hammerhead shark! They're one of the most powerful sharks in the ocean."

Natasha hears the little girl gasp, watching their eyes going wide with wonder. She can't help the small laugh that escapes when she sees the young girl lean closer towards the glass before loudly whispering, "is it going to eat us?"

You laugh softly, and Natasha can't help but think that she's missed hearing the sound of your laugh, something she thought she wouldn’t hear again. It comforts her slightly to know that it hasn't changed after all these years, and that  she can still easily recognise the sound as being yours only.

"It won't eat us! Sharks don't eat humans," she hears you explain. "They're more interested in fish and seals, than they are humans. But they are really strong swimmers, and they can smell things from miles away - even in water!"

She'd been watching you answer questions about sharks for the past 5 minutes, after a curious little girl ran up to while you were looking at the shark tank and asked if you knew what type of shark was swimming in front of the glass.

"Do sharks talk to each other?"

"They don't talk like we do, but they do communicate by using their bodies and how they move through the water. Some sharks even make sounds by rubbing their teeth together, kind of like a secret language that only they can hear."

It doesn't take long for the girl's mother to find the three of you, sighing in relief as she sees her daughter, looking up at you apologetically.

"Sorry, she's probably been asking you a million questions."

You give the woman a friendly smile and shake your head. "It was nothing, I loved answering all of her questions." You tell her. "It looks like you might have a future marine biologist on your hands."

"Let's leave the lovely ladies to enjoy the rest of their date, bubba."

"Oh- it's not-"

"We're not-"

The mother and daughter are already walking off before either of you could finish your sentences, leaving you and Natasha standing in front of the shark exhibit with red cheeks and thundering heartbeats. 

Natasha catches your eyes as you glance at her in a shy glance, and she knows it's too late. The warmth that passes through her as you smile, the same warm and knowing smile that you used to give her when everything was still okay was almost enough to bring her down to her knees.

You interrupt before her thoughts can spiral any further, clearing your throat before gesturing with your head the direction of the next exhibit.

"Shall we keep going?"

 -x-

Natasha sits across from you at a small café by the beach. You mention to her that it was your secret place, one that you go to when you wanted time to slow down and just have a moment to catch your breath. After the little incident at the aquarium, you guys decided it was best to just sit and people watch for the time being to avoid any more awkward interactions.

The warmth emanating from the cup of coffee did little to chase away the little chills that ran down her spine every time Natasha caught you gaze lingering on her for longer than you must've realised.

She told you about the plans that she and the girls had made for their vacation while you filled her in on your own life, telling her about your cousin that had just recently come to visit you just before Christmas.

"I'm glad you chose to come with me." You admit after a pause in conversation, voice soft. She turns to look at you, your eyes meeting hers with such an intensity it made her breath get caught in her throat. "I missed getting to talk to you like this."

She can tell that you spoke without thinking, the widening of your eyes giving you away. You look away, muttering a quiet "sorry" before lifting your drink to your lips in an attempt to hide the flush of your cheeks.

She was supposed to be over you. She'd told herself time and time again that she had moved on, but seeing you again, and being here with you, she couldn't deny that she was still in love with you. Having you so close yet so unreachable leaves an ache in her chest.

Throughout the time you two had been sat at the café, she watched you with fondness at the way your eyes lit up while you spoke with excitement in your voice about the things you and your cousin had gotten up to in the week they were with you; Natasha realises that she missed you too - and the comfort that you brought her just by simply being near.

"Nat? You okay?" The worry in your voice only deepens the ache in her heart.

"Yeah, no, sorry - I'm okay." She answers with a shaky nod, breathing deeply. She allows herself to feel her emotions, knowing that it would only do harm if she tried to deny herself this moment with you.

"I missed you too."

The sadness settles deep within her chest, the way you looked so shocked at her words - and she wonders if you were expecting her dismiss your words.

Her phone pings loudly from where it was placed on the table, the text tone sounding off four times in a row as her screen lights up between the two of you.

Natasha!! We've landed :D - Wanda

Sestra, we're on our way to the hotel now, tell lover girl to drop you off now - Yelena

Hi Nat, sorry again - we'll be there in 30 minutes! - Kate

I'll check us in if we make it to the hotel first, Nat, just let us know when you're there - Maria

You both watch as each text pops up on her phone, knowing that your time together was coming to an end.

Natasha watches as you ponder for a moment - wondering if you were going to add on to your words from before now that she's admitted that she missed you too. For a second it does seem like you're about to say something, but instead you just shake your head slightly to yourself, clearing your throat and as you look away, flagging down a waiter to pay for the meal you shared.

"We should probably get going if we want to get to the hotel at the same time as them."

She allows herself a moment to watch as you gather everything, absentmindedly listening to you talk about leaving now so we don't hit traffic - though I guess it's fair to make them wait, considering they made you wait like 10 hours, that's a practically a whole day wasted where you guys could've been sightseeing!

Natasha knows your putting on a brave front - she can see it in your eyes as you gather your wallet and keys, but she begrudgingly gets up after you pay for the bill, walking back with you to your car.

Already dreading the moment she has to say goodbye.

-x-

"Well, I guess this is where I leave you."

Pulling up at the front of the hotel, you catch a glance of Yelena, Kate and Wanda through the window. Even though you couldn't see her, you knew Maria wouldn't be too far away. Probably checking everyone in, you assumed as you parked your car near the entrance.

You do your best to avoid looking at Natasha, taking your time in getting out and grabbing her bags from the trunk, knowing this could very well be the last time you see her again. The thought alone breaks your heart all over again - you can recall all the times you've begged the universe to let your paths cross once more. Now that your wish has been granted and you're preparing to say goodbye to her once again, you deeply feel the loss of her from your life before it's even happened.

She's already watching you as you close the trunk. You hope that she can't see the tears that have been slowly building up since you started the drive to the hotel. You refuse to let yourself hope that the look in her eyes could mean anything order than gratitude.

"Thank you, Y/N, for today." She tells you softly.

"It's was nothing, Nat," you say with a smile, before softly adding, "you're welcome and I hope you guys have a Merry Christmas."

Getting lost in the silence that falls between you; you miss the way she's looking at you as you stare down at your shoes, waiting for her to grab her things and go so you can drive back to your apartment and sulk for the rest of the week. You wonder if she can see the way your hands are shaking as you wait for the inevitable goodbye.

"Y/N?"

You hum in response, not trusting your voice to stay steady if you decided to use actual words.

"I had a really good time today."

You tilt your head in curiosity. You've had a hard time all day trying to gauge if Natasha was having enjoying herself or not. There's no doubt in your mind that she would've said something if she wasn't.

"And it got me thinking," she continues. "I don't know- maybe I'm reading into everything wrong, and you can absolutely say no. You'll probably say no, because this is crazy, but I had to say something before I lose my mind-"

"Nat." You interrupt. As endearing as it was to hear her ramble on, to see her getting more and more flustered as she kept talking, you knew she'd work herself up before she every got to what she actually wanted to say.

"Breathe, love."

You nod encouragingly after she takes a deep breath, giving her time to gather her thoughts.

"Maybe it doesn't have to be so wrong, you know?" She starts. "To try again."

You try to hide the shock that you feel, but can't stop the way your eyes widen ever so slightly at her words. Never in a million years did you expect her to even say yes to spending the day with you, let alone suggest giving your relationship another go.

Does she mean just a friendship or an actual relationship?

Is she just saying that because of today?

What if she realises she doesn't actually mean that later on?

What if this was just a joke and she was just waiting for you to say yes so she can go "aha! I was just kidding as if I'd be serious."?

What if-

"We're different people now, don't you think?"

Confused but curious to know what else you had to say, she nods. "I'd say we are."

"We're older than we were before." You add. "We know a lot more about ourselves now, I'm not the scared kid I used to be."

You're scared of making the same mistakes you did all those years ago. But you also know that you're more than willing to learn from those mistakes; to stay and communicate to make things work instead of running away at the first sign of trouble. Because if there's anything you want more in the world, it's to make this work with her.

But just as much as you are scared, you can't help but be excited. Excited and honoured to learn more about this new Natasha, and fall in love with her all over again. You can't wait to find out what stayed the same, and what changed about her. Whatever she was willing to share with you, you'd gladly take.

"I could love you properly this time."

She gasps softly, and your heart pounds at the prospect of already scaring her away.

The thought of her friends seeing this happening through the window of the hotel briefly crosses your mind - you wonder if they'd approve of you making a return to Natasha's life or if they'll make you work for it after the way things ended between you two.

But she smiles, stepping into your personal space to wrap her arms around your neck and all thoughts leave your mind. The only thing you can focus on is Natasha pulling you closer so her words are only for your ears and your ears only to hear.

"I could love you properly this time too."

-----

@sadonism

[mrsshabana]

𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐂𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬 ✧ 𝐆𝐲𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

ꔫ Content Gyutaro x female!reader, canon-ish, fluff

ꔫ Note Happy Holidays everyone! I haven't had much time to write lately since I'm moving. But I wanted to give you guys a little something for the holidays! ଘ( ･ω･)_/ﾟ･:*:･｡☆

Gyutaro always hated Christmas.

He's a demon now so it's not like the holiday is meant for him, but even as a human he hated it. The holiday just served as a reminder of everything he never had. Family, gifts, food, love. It just wasn't fair.

After he turned into a demon he took it upon himself to celebrate Christmas in his own special way. Scouting out the rich neighborhoods to find his own Christmas feast.

It was sadistic, but that's Gyutaro's idea of fun. He enjoyed torturing those who were more fortunate than himself, of course. But in a way, he also felt like he was enacting revenge for those who weren't strong enough to do it themselves. All of the orphans and poor children who spent Christmas night out on the cold streets of the entertainment district.

It became a Christmas tradition for Gyutaro. But things changed when he met you.

He first noticed you when he heard your voice through his sister's ears. It sounded heavenly, instantly waking him from his slumber. And by the elegant kimono you wore, he guessed you were just another rich woman. Destined to spend Christmas in some mansion surrounded by loads of gifts. It infuriated him.

So, that year you became his target.

And on Christmas Eve he followed you home, only to see something that surprised him. You weren't rich, no, far from it. You lived in a small home on the outskirts of town. Your home was not decorated in the slightest and you didn't even have a Christmas tree.

"This can't be right... a girl as pretty as her can't spend Christmas alone," he grumbles to himself. He decided to stay and watch you for a while, figuring that you must have a rich boyfriend or something like that.

But no. No one came and you opened no gifts. The pretty girl that Gyutaro was previously jealous of, spent the entire night by herself.

You were the first person to surprise Gyutaro in a very long time. The first person with a beautiful face who didn't have a life to match it. Behind closed doors, you lived a life full of sadness and loneliness. Though at work and in front of others you always wore a smile, never wanting anyone to worry about you.

But you couldn't hide the truth from Gyutaro. He continued to watch you from the shadows even after Christmas had long passed. Stalking you from rooftops, listening to your voice through his sister's ears, watching you up close from her eyes. He actually smiles when you're around.

And when Christmas comes once again he can't help but feel like it's a shame that you don't know about him. That you don't know that there's someone out there who loves you. Someone you've never even met.

A part of him wants to finally reveal himself and confess his feelings. But what if you reject him? What if you're disgusted by his ugliness like everyone else is? He wouldn't be able to go on if something like that happened. Maybe he'd snap and just kill you. He knows himself, and he knows that's something he'd probably do. So instead he decides not to reveal himself for now. However, he still wants to do something for you. Something to let you know that you aren't as alone as you may think.

You got an extra shift at work, hoping to work as much as possible so you could forget what time of year it was. But you had to go home eventually.

You take the alleyways home, wanting to avoid the main streets so you don't have to see the Christmas lights or hear the Christmas carols. You just want December to end already so things can be back to normal. So you don't have to remember the painful memories that this holiday brings.

As you approach your home you immediately notice that something's off. There is a faint glow in your window. But that can't be right. You know you couldn't afford any lights or decorations. And even if you could, you wouldn't have spent any money on them.

Hesitantly, you open the door. And nothing looks out of place or stolen. But there is a small tree in your living room.

It looks like it was torn out of the ground because the roots are still attached and there is frost on its leaves. It's propped half-hazardly against the wall. Sloppily decorated with red ribbons and random trinkets.

On the floor is a single candle, a note, and a crudely-wrapped box.

Did someone seriously break into your home to give you a tree and a Christmas present? This has to be some kind of joke right?

You're skeptical, but you decide to open the note anyways and give it a read.

"Dear Y/N,

You don't know me but I know you. I think you are very pretty. I am always here, even if you don't know it. You aren't as lonely as you think. Merry Christmas.

-Love G"

The handwriting is barely legible and what you can read sounds slightly creepy, like you might have some kind of stalker. But you can tell that whoever did this genuinely cares for you. Creepy or not. And your heart warms up at the thought that someone went out of their way to do this for you.

With teary eyes, you open the gift. Inside the small box is a beautiful bracelet with brilliant emeralds. You've never received such a thoughtful gift.

You hold the bracelet close, clutching it to your chest as tears stream down your cheeks. Overcome with gratitude and appreciation for this person that you don't even know. Yet they were so kind to do this for you anyway. Not even wanting to reveal themselves to receive praise and love, no. They just wanted you to be happy. They couldn't care less if you knew who it was really from. Seeing that smile on your face is more than enough for them.

"Thank you...," you mumble.

You don't receive a response but you can feel that someone is watching from the shadows, with a big toothy grin on his face.

[cheshireliam]

"Wrapped in Wicked Romance" Story Event: Chapter 1

Ring Schwartz

This is a fan-made translation solely for entertainment purposes with no guaranteed perfection; expect mistakes, grammatical errors, and some creative liberties. All original content and media used belongs to Cybird. Please support the game by buying their stories and playing their games. Reblogs appreciated.

Read this before interacting

Kate: Why did you… kill them…?

Ring: “Why”...? Is it not natural? 

Ring: I’ll kill anyone as long as Dari orders me to.

His face, splattered with blood, showed not even the slightest bit of doubt about the murder he just committed.

It was at that moment when I finally realised it.

He, too— was utterly evil. 

…

One night, I stumbled upon a secret I never should've known, which led to me becoming Fairytale Keeper for a month.

A week after, Vogel, an organisation consisting of Cursed Ones similar to Crown, appeared and seemed to be hiding something. 

…

A few days after my encounter with them, I was called upon by Vogel’s chief— Darius. 

Darius: I’ve heard about it. To deepen your understanding of Crown’s members, you became their lover for a day.

Darius: We want you to do the same thing with us. The kind Miss Fairytale Keeper will surely agree to it, right? 

Unable to make the decision on my own, I quickly went to discuss it with Victor. 

…

Victor: Lovers for a day with Vogel? 

Kate: Yes. They also mentioned that they want me to show them around the city at the same time. 

Victor: I see… I don't have a problem with that arrangement. I happen to also have been thinking about giving them a tour of the city. 

Victor: What are your thoughts, Kate?

Kate: I… I can't stop thinking about what Harrison said to me that day. 

Victor: That Vogel is lying, is it?

Victor: I understand your concern, but we still can’t say for certain whether their lies are harmful to Crown. 

Victor: I doubt that they would be so reckless as to harm you in this situation. Therefore… 

Victor: The most important factor we should consider is what you want to do.

…

(What I want to do…?) 

(Victor did say he'd turn them down if I don't feel comfortable, but…)

(Since I’m going to have interactions with Vogel as a Fairytale Keeper, I’m personally curious about what kind of people the three of them are.) 

(So in order to find out… I’ll accept this request.)

(But before that…)

Kate: Excuse me, who is that tailing me? 

Ever since I left Victor’s office, I’ve had the gut feeling that someone was following behind me. 

When I voiced it out, a man emerged from the shadows.

Kate: Ring…? 

I called his name, although I still wasn't used to doing that because he only said very recently that I could address him as such without the use of salutations. 

Ring: Y-you misunderstood. I didn't mean to tail you today.

Ring: There’s something I want to ask you about… I just couldn't figure out when to approach you.

Kate: … Something you want to ask?

Ring: I wanted to ask who you’re choosing to be your lover for a day. 

Kate: Umm… and what do you intend to do with that information? 

Ring: Depending on whether you choose Nica or Dari, I’ll need to change my route and method for being their escort for security purposes. 

Ring: With the close, intimate distance of being “lovers”... who knows what tricks you’ll pull on the two of them. 

It appeared that Ring was wary of me and planned to protect them regardless of who I chose.

(Hm? But in that case…) 

Kate: What happens to the whole escort planning thing if I choose you to be my “lover”?

Ring: ME!? 

Ring: I- I don’t understand… Normally, either Nica or Dari would be chosen for this sort of thing. You don't need to consider such a possibility. 

Kate: But Darius said to choose “one member from Vogel”. 

Kate: So choosing you isn't a problem, right?

Ring: I-it’s a HUGE problem…! M-me as your l-lo-lov-lover…!? 

… Initially, I asked the question because I was genuinely curious how he intended to go about the escorting. 

But seeing Ring turning bright red and panicking sparked a mischievous impulse in me.

Kate: I’ve decided! I’m choosing you as my lover for a day.

Ring: WHAT!? You absolutely CANNOT do that! 

Darius: Really? I think that's a wonderful idea, though. 

The voice cutting into our exchange was Darius, who happened to be passing by.

Ring: D-Dari… why?

Darius: Somehow, it sounds like it’d be interesting. 

Ring: But what if she “cajoles¹” me into doing her bidding…!? 

¹ The word for “cajole” is 篭絡 (ろうらくrōraku). Here, when Ring’s says it, it was written in hiragana as “ろーらく” to express that his pronunciation of the word wasn't very accurate; possibly because his first language is german and not english. 

Darius: You know such a complex phrase as “cajole”? Good job, good job. 

Darius: But don’t worry. Miss Fairytale Keeper could never be a threat to us.

Darius: Have I ever been wrong about such things? 

Ring: … Never.

Darius: Then there's no problem at all. 

Darius: Go on, Ring. Pass auf dich auf (have a great day²). 

² For the record, I don't understand German at all. I’m only translating based on the Japanese translation provided by the game in the form of furigana.

As soon as Darius said something to him in their native language, Ring became obedient like a well-trained guard dog. 

Ring: … Alles klar (understood). 

…

The next day, I became Ring’s lover for a day and was tasked to give him a tour of the city.

Kate: I look forward to spending the day with you. 

Ring: … Oh, uh, yeah. Dari ordered me to “pretend to be Miss Fairytale Keeper’s lover for a day”. 

Ring: Going on a… d… da… date… with you… I- I’ll do it just fine. Just you watch…! 

(Ring looks extremely nervous…)

I was a little nervous myself, but seeing how tense he was actually made me feel better. 

Ring: S-so… the first destination is The Scala, right?

Kate: Yes. Since it’s a date, I decided to take you to some of my favourite places today. 

Kate: We could take a carriage there, but the weather is pleasant today. Shall we walk instead?

Ring: … Got it. Also, um… 

Ring looked like there was something he wanted to say as he stretched his right arm out in my direction. 

Kate: …?

Ring: Ah! No… nothing. T-this is just me warming up! 

He pulled his arm back and started rolling his shoulders in circles.

[notbecauseofvictories]

50/50

Well, 2024 sure did...happen.

Anyway! I didn't set any sort of goal to watch 50 films and read 50 books this year, but that's where I ended up. Neither number is exactly accurate, and I'm leaving out television, revisiting what I've already read/watched, and all the ridiculous novels I pick up when I'm hungover, but still. I'm kind of impressed with myself. I didn't get to 50 books last year, and I don't think I've watched 50 movies in a year ever---but the more I watch them, the more I explore what they can do and communicate, the more I want to see. As a lifelong reader, it's interesting to explore a new kind of art, to try and intuit your way in through a strikingly different form of communicating the exact same humanness.

TOP FIVE 2024

FILMS

The Florida Project (2017)

Crimes of the Future (2022)

M (1931)

Something in the Dirt (2022)

We’re All Going to the World’s Fair (2021)

It's been months and months since I saw The Florida Project, and I still think about it. The bright and artificial sherbet coloring of it; the dank and mold and shadows that linger around the edges....Actually, I think of all these films in terms of their aesthetics first. Not that there wasn't a story there, but because they all represent such a marriage with form. Consider Crimes of the Future with its fading decay, its browns and rust; M with its stylized, refined cityscape even in the greyscale of 30s cinema; Something in the Dirt where every shot is mundane, or fantastical or both; and We're All Going to the World's Fair, with the particular blue-grey loneliness of the internet age. Surely the benefit of watching a movie (as opposed to anything else) is being presented with something to watch, and I like when directors and creative teams understand that.

Honorable mention to American Psycho (2000) since I'm still a little insane about it---or maybe Corsage (2022) because whether or not it was a good movie, it was nevertheless the most uncompromising, brutal portrait of a historical figure I've seen.

BOOKS

The Rehearsal, Eleanor Catton

Big Swiss, Jen Beagin

Vintner's Luck, Elizabeth Knox

Wylding Hall, Elizabeth Hand

Diavola, Jennifer Thorne

Some people may try to tell you that horror is a discrete genre---I am here to tell you that it's not. All great novels are horror stories, and those listed above especially. From The Rehearsal's self-important artistes, to the therapy-speak Millennials of Big Swiss, to the musicians of Wylding Hall (who miss every sign that Something Is Happening) and the Pace family of Diavola (who deny that the signs mean anything, even after fleeing their vacation home in the night)....all these novels are a study in people experiencing something painful, even terrible. And yet, that provides incredibly fertile territory for their authors to explore the things that come with horror---complicity, desire for closeness, narration and performance, the open wound of family, the thin netting of modernity that keeps us from plunging into something older and darker than we can comprehend.

The only exception might be Vintner's Luck. Not because it's not there as a theme, but because the novel itself spans the narrator's life. By the time he's middle-aged he's committed so many errors, he can't judge too harshly when others do. In this respect it's almost an answer to the questions horror poses---not just how do you survive this? but how do you go on, having survived that?

Honorable mention to Dead Inside, by Chandler Morrison, because it was stomach-turning in the very best way. Echoes of Cipher by Kathe Koja---when an author really knows, really understands, how to wield grossness without shirking or apologizing for it, the result is delightful.

Books of 2020 | Books of 2021 | Books of 2022 | Books of 2023

[komelliko]

manipulative!boss!sunday x timid!secretary!reader

summary: After Sunday spoiled your 'not-date' with Aventurine, he feels he still has to warn you about some things. wc: 1.6k - this is nsfw! cw for dubcon! fondling, masturbation, sexual fantasy a/n: The guillemets «» are still used to indicate Sunday's telepathy!

part 5 / part 6 (nsfw) --- You insisted that Aventurine not walk you back home—It was hard to articulate one sole reason why. Sunday's confrontation was a large factor, though. It didn't feel right to throw him into more trouble like that—let him get the sweep, as he put it. You could brave the streets back to your apartment by yourself without much hassle, anyways. Very little of Golden Hour was left unlit, after all. You turn to look behind you. The feeling of still being watched crawls up your back like a creeping fungus, a sense of unease clinging to your spine all the way until it reaches your throat. But in the cacophony in golden light and bustling figures, you can't make anything out. You know who it is that's following you. You just pretend he's not there, and simply press on.

« But something tells you that you have to take another route. » You're not sure why...? So you stop, you steady yourself, and you try to figure out where you are and how long it is until you're on Glaux Avenue. « Something tells you that you have to walk behind the food truck and into the passageway between that jewelry store and that automobile dealer. » Hesitant, you trust the strange feeling, slipping behind the truck and into a dark passageway, two impenetrable walls of brick squeezing the thin line of the alley together, bins of waste and discarded belongings littering both sides. You don't understand what makes you think this will be a shortcut to Glaux Avenue. 

« But something tells you that if you just take a few more steps, just barely enough to no longer be in the light, just a few more, one more step... » You get the notion that someone familiar is behind you. You freeze in place, recognizing the exact sound of the footsteps calmly approaching you in great clarity. You turn a quarter of the way around, not yet enough to meet his eyes before— Sunday clasps a hand over your face. You feel your lips smushed under his palm, your front teeth against the cool cotton fabric of his white glove. "Listen to me for a moment," he commands. "Don't speak." You stay silent, eyes locked on the wall in front of you. You assume you'd be terrified out of your mind if you had it within yourself to be that way. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was the surprise. Besides, you were sure making a fuss wouldn't do anything good. "No matter how I or any member of The Family may act around that man in public, I cannot stress to you how little you should trust him. From this moment forward, do not answer any questions he asks, do not accept anything he offers you, and by Xipe, do not ever let me find you fraternizing with him ever again." Oh. You swear you could almost break out laughing. This- This wasn't Sunday. Sunday had been unusual at times, sure, but it was all innocent (if uncomfortable) behavior. It's almost comical, you assure yourself, to hear such harsh threats come out of his mouth! That explains why you can barely believe what he's saying, after all. Nothing to do with being terrified of your employer—nothing of the sort. "...Awlrigh...?" "Are you not taking me seriously, [Y/N]?" You take in a sharp breath, even if it's stunted by Sunday's hand in your face. Frantically, you shake your head no. "Good. I'm glad you have returned to being reasonable." His hand lifts off your mouth, an awkward thread of saliva connecting your bottom lip to the damp stain of breath on the palm of his glove. Sunday closes his hand, almost as if he's tenderly holding the spot on his glove for safe keeping, before bringing it down to hold on to your waist. "[Y/N], you are one of the most important people in the entire Family. What you decide to do with your time impacts not just you, but the entirely of Penacony. Do you remember what I said about upholding our reputations?" "Yes, sir." "I meant every word of it." Both of his hands are now holding your sides, bringing you in to press your back up against him. "You must understand what the good people of Penacony would think of me if I let my dear assistant run off with a member of the IPC." Sunday takes in another breath as if he means to say more, but stops himself. You can almost feel his composure slip for a moment, and as you turn your head back to see what the matter is, you notice him looking around warily—Checking for witnesses. His right hand slowly and hesitantly ascends, wrapping his fingers around your breast, creasing the cloth of your blazer underneath his grip. Sunday barely stifles a groan, his other hand squeezing your side fiercely as if to steady himself. "I w- I would not consider myself a vengeful man, [Y/N]," he stammers, lightheaded with his own desire as he fondles you. "Nor would I consider myself a man who is jealous beyond reasonable means. It is not covetous nor avaricious merely to insist upon what is already mine." His last sentence is tugged almost into a hoarse cry, and he bites his tongue to suppress another groan.

Though he would be remiss to admit it to you at a time like this, Sunday understands what he is doing is unconscionable, and he hated himself for it. But there is simply no other recourse. In matters of temptation, his behavior only seems sinful on the imperfect surface. For temptation is the fledgling form of greed, of gluttony and corruption, but the source of that which drove him to take you in his hands and tortured him night after night with thoughts of defiling you was instead responsibility.

Sunday has an obligation to make his possession of you known to himself, to you, and most importantly, to others. Others like that Avgin scum who dared to try and steal you from him behind his back. More were bound to attempt similar foolish things if Sunday did not reassert his authority with proper haste. You feel Sunday's breath curl down the back of your neck as he moves your hair to one shoulder. He plants a kiss on the soft flesh of your neck, right where it meets the edge of your jaw, and you shudder at the feelings of his lips against your skin. "If I can't trust you to make wise choices with your time off, I might not be able to give you time off at all," Sunday whispers lowly in your ear, his tone dreadfully serious. "We don't want to worry about you getting in trouble, do we?" He pauses for a moment, before adding "I certainly don't." And just as his hands remove themselves from your body, you turn around and Sunday has vanished. ... ... ... ...

Sunday is able to think about little else once he reaches his quarters, and he shuts his door emphatically the moment he enters.

To alleviate his own misdeeds, it is imperative that he approach it in an orderly fashion. Sunday takes off his coat properly and hangs it on the third spoke of his coat rack. With his dorsal wings free to open, Sunday takes off his vest one arm at a time, folding it neatly and setting it on his dresser. Sunday rolls up the bottom hem of his shirt until it reaches his torso, then pulls the neck over his head, then extends his arms out to pull it off his body entirely—The shirt then folded neatly as well, and set next to the folded vest. As one last precaution, Sunday scans his quarters. Not a blind has been left undrawn, nor a door left cracked open, nor an object out of its usual place. Sunday listens to the sound of his own breathing for a moment, as it is his only company: It is labored, heavy with desperation, tortured with knowledge of Sunday's unfulfilled responsibilities. Sunday sits himself on the side of his bed, facing away from the door, and undoes his belt. Xipe will forgive him. Xipe will forgive him. That which torments him is much more than wanton impulse. The infraction of him spitting in his own palm and satisfying his own carnal urges is infinitesimal to the weight of Penacony's corruption. With no person to confess to but himself, Bronze Melodia of Xipe, Sunday has full authority to absolve himself of guilt. For a cause like his, his actions are no transgression. With the stories he's listened to, Sunday knows the habits of lesser men, and lesser men do worse daily without even a second thought. Sunday brings his other hand up to massage his face, his head rolling back from the feeling of his own hand stroking him. In due time, it would be your hand, soft and gentle and perfumed and perfect in ways he could barely fathom, the rhythm of your delicate fingers brushing against his smoldering-hot skin euphoric beyond his wildest imagination. Sunday falls back onto his own bed, one foot lifting to dig its heel into the mattress as his movements grow more fervid at the thought of your face, your voice, the kind look in your eyes. Nothing short of taking you entirely could satiate him, and he knew it; There would be no other way to fulfill his responsibilities towards you. He bites his tongue, holding back grunts a more sinful man would make carelessly, and dares not to buck his hips into his own hand like some sort of uncouth aberrant. Still, even as his tongue is held, your name is repeated in his thoughts like a desperate prayer. With the invocation of your name, he begs for mercy from this torture. With your name, he begs for release. [Y/N]. [Y/N]. [Y/N].

--- a/n: tumblr was fighting with me this whole fucking time and I finally figured out it was because of it that third sunday mind control sentence and for the life of me I could not tell you what was so bad about it so prevent me from posting this feedback is always appreciated! tag list: @j1yu425 @crepezinhos @i-am-tiredd @8x9d @ruruize @herrscherofprocrastination

[ollyissleppy]

𝐈𝐭'𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞!

summary: it's finally here! Christmas has started it's time to enjoy some breakfast and open gifts with your loving boyfriend. Maybe one of the gifts under the tree is from him? a/n: I would like to wish everyone happy holidays and that you'll be able to spend them just the way you want, no matter if it's with family, friends or alone :) also thank you all so much for joining me on this adventure and I hope I'll see you some more <3 cw: none?

series masterlist

You feel something wet on you the moment you wake up. It takes you a while to figure out that they were kisses. You open your eyes and see your boyfriend, who has been kissing you all over your face. Rafayel notices that you're awake and smiles.

"Good morning" he gives you another kiss, this time on your lips.

"Morning" you smile at him, still waking up.

"We should exchange our gifts now" Rafayel moves away, reaching to his side of the bed and looking for something.

"No, Raf, we should wait till the evening like normal people" you stretch, feeling your muscles stirring awake.

"We're not normal people, though" Rafayel returns to your side and gives you a small box. "Anyway, here"

"Alright, let's do it now" you put the box he gave you on the bed and reach for the gift you had prepared for your boyfriend.

The two of you focus on opening your gifts, with Rafayel chaotically ripping the paper apart. You laugh, seeing how desperate he is to see that he got. You finally got rid of all the wrapping to see what's inside the small box. You slowly open it to reveal a beautiful handcrafted ring with your favourite minerals and metal in it. You gasp, unsure if you should take it out of the box, scared that you might break it.

"Rafayel, it's beautiful" you look over at your boyfriend, smiling at him.

"It's enchanted, so I can find you no matter where you go," he says, taking the ring out of the box and putting it on your finger.

"Even in the afterlife."

You were flipping another pancake, when you heard footsteps coming out of the bedroom, telling you that your boyfriend was awake. You turn to face him to greet him with a kiss.

"Can we exchange presents now?" He asks you after pulling away.

"I thought we'd wait until evening, but sure" you agree, finishing up the last pancake and turning off the stove.

The two of you go to grab the gifts you got each other and meet up in the kitchen. You meet up in the kitchen and give each other gifts. Yours was shaped like a rectangle. You carefully unwrap it to see a book with the words 'you&me' written on the cover. You open the book to see a picture you took while going to check out christmas lights. Around the picture there was a short message:

'From Xavier to (name).

Let's spend a 1000 more christmases with each other.'

You turn a few more pages to see even more pictures of the two of you with sweet messages written around. Some of those messages were saying how cute you looked, and some we saying how grateful Xavier was to be able to enjoy these moments with you.

"Do you like it?" He asks you and that's when you noticed that he was carefully watching your expression, his gift remaining unopened.

"Xav, I love it" you look at him with teary eyes, deeply touched by how thoughtful his gift was.

"I'd love to spend a 1000 more christmases with you."

Sylus wakes you up with a smack on your shoulder. You open your eyes annoyed, about to ask him what got his panties in a twist when he speaks:

"Do you hear that?" You focus your senses to check what he's talking about. At first, you can't really pick up anything, but then you hear it: some commotion in the living room.

You nod your head, letting Sylus know that you can hear it too. No words are exchanged between the two of you, as you grab your weapons and get ready to get rid of who is rummaging in the living room. Both of you make your way closer to the place where the noise came from. To your surprise, the noise wasn't some intruders trying to mess with something, but Kieran and Luke who happened to wake up bright and early, excited about their presents.

You and Sylus lower your weapons, looking at the twins who are surrounded by wrapping paper and checking out their gifts. You look over at your boyfriend with an amused look in your eyes.

"I see that you got into presents already" Sylus chuckles. His voice scares the twins, both of them jumping up, ready to explain themselves. "You're fine, we were thinking of opening them in the morning anyway."

Kieran and Luke still apologise for not waiting for you and Sylus to wake up. You brush them off, sitting down on the couch with your boyfriend. Kieran gives you a small box that was from Sylus and Luke gives him a gift you bought. You carefully open the box to see what's inside. Inside there was a beautiful locket with small details engraved in it. You opened the locket to reveal a picture with you and Sylus in it. It also happened to be one of the first pictures you took after you started dating.

"I love it, Sylus" you kiss his cheek. "But it better not have a tracker in it" you joke, making Sylus laugh.

"It has one, actually!" Kieran says, happy you understand. Luke smacks in the back of his head, telling him to be quiet.

"They're just joking around. You know how they get."

The smell of freshly cooked food is the first thing you register after waking up. The second thing you notice is the lack of your boyfriend on his side of the bed, letting you know that this is the person behind this delicious smell. You lay in bed for a little longer, before deciding to get up. You make your way to the kitchen to check out what Zayne is making.

"Good morning," you say, wrapping your arms around him from the back.

"Good morning, love" Zayne greets you, turning around to hug you back. "I was thinking that it would be best if we exchanged presents in the morning."

"Sounds good to me" you smile, pulling away to grab your gift.

The two of you are back in the kitchen, breakfast-making process stopped for the time being. Instead, both of you focus on each other's gifts. You watch Zayne for a bit, his unwrapping technique making you giggle about how careful he is not to rip the paper. You move your attention to the present before you. You start unwrapping it, although you were much less careful about not ripping the paper. With the paper out of the way, you notice that your gift is some sort of jewellery box. You open it to see the most beautiful-looking bracelet with some sort of screen on it.

"It shows your heart rate and it's connected to my phone to let me know if there's something wrong" Zayne says as he's helping you clip it around your wrist.

"It's perfect thank you." You kiss him across the table.

"Anything for you, my love."

taglist: @leighsartworks216 @faeryminnyx @iloveboysinred @sstar-ggirl @bellagrayson-wayne

[pissterdaniel]

TIT AUCKLAND FINAL RECAP

the spoilery stuff is at the bottom of the post, the rest is safe

Since June there has been a discord server going for everyone at the Auckland show. It was amazing to make so many friends before even going to the show. We all got to know each other in the months leading up to the event. Super cool!

We all met up for lunch before the show to hang out and exchanged our crafts. (craft haul x) It made me so happy to see people excited to meet Carlos and my dolls :).

@peter-must-die with his amazing shirt holding Carlos

We made our way to the KTK theater, and I bought some merch. Literally shouted when I opened my photocards to see BLONDE QUIFF PHIL!!!!!! :O

I came PREPARED for my meet and greet, had an agenda broken down into 3 steps. I had been overthinking this for months and have lost so much sleep from tit anxiety. The plan was very helpful! I was revising it in the line.

My hands were totally full. Sister Daniel kept on escaping my grip, we think she was trying to run away. I also recall repeatedly doing my Christophe Giacometti (from yuri on ice) impression in the line.

In the meet and greet line I discovered that I randomly have a lot of upper body strength 😅. I was giving out VERYYY tight deep pressure hugs to people who wanted them. It was very calming. I also got a stopwatch out and we did some 4/4/8 breathing. Then our time was almost up, and WE COULD SEE DAN.

I filmed Max's meet and greet for them first. So that was good getting to spend a minute or so in front of Dan and Phil before it was my turn. I had briefed Max on my agenda, so they knew exactly what to do. My full meet and greet post with photos and the video are here (x). THANK YOU SO MUCH @shitwheresfoxy FOR BEING THE BEST GLAMOUROUS ASSISTANT EVER!

Phil did not seem like a human. I stupidly told him he was like an animatronic robot. He is just SO BEAUTIFUL IT DOESNT SEEM REAL. You need to understand, PHIL LESTER IS SO ETHERALLY GORGEOUS IT IS OUT OF THIS WORLD!!!!!!!! He's just so 🥰. No wonder Dan can't stop looking at him like that in the videos. I get it now.

Dan definitely led my m&g, and I've heard others say this too. He does most of the talking, offers to take the photos, and he had the biggest reactions to things. I made him cackle a few times and I will wear that like a badge of honour. Some other highlights include:

Dan's first reaction to Carlos "uhh.. what?"

Dan's crab hands in our selfie

Dan talking to my camera whilst I fetched something from Max

Their first reaction to my dolls

Phil waving and saying bye to me

BONUS 1 MINUTE AND 39 MINUTE VIDEO OF PHIL HOLDING CARLOS, THIS MEANS THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE TO ME

I am slightly embarrassed about how excited I got, I went a bit nuts. Told them Carlos was "the love of my life" 🤦. Was completely hyper after the m&g, had major zoomies and couldn't calm down. That's when we caught up with the silver VIP people from the server.

@totally-srs-all-the-time made this STUNNING bedsheet cape and wanted to put it on me to have mega bed sheet titfit. Only when she held it up to me, I thought she was wanting to use it as a weighted blanket to calm me. So I lay on the floor 😂, she still put it on me and got this pic.

Met the phiwi backpack too!!!

I recorded our preshow and put it on youtube (x). Can't believe Olly's figure skating question was answered! That was wickedly cool. There is a very small group of us who got SUPER into ice skating these past couple of months. So to have our niche acknowledged by Dan himself was PHENOMENAL.

We all danced to HOTOGO, @einsteinfrizz 's amazing video from the balcony can be found here (x)

And then it was time for the show.

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!!

I took notes during intermission and after the show of what I remembered.

Our conspiracies were:

Toilet, Clothes, Bus, and Vegas

"They share clothes." Went on about how their nipples touch the same cloth and did weird nipply gestures.

Lawyer Dan banned Australia, wrote erotic fanfiction about Gollum, and went to jail for killing phil. (Phil then said "hopefully he was not a CEO" and everyone CHEERED SO LOUDLY FOR AGES. They were both caught off guard by the big audience reaction, and it seemed like Dan was genuinely surprised/shocked that Phil said that.

Linguist Phil's favourite word was 'perky nana', he liked to help old ladies cum, and had a secret collection of lesbians.

Phil's 1 minute improv was on stationary. He thought the person said penis, but he changed it to pens, and then decided to change it to stationary. He told a story of how he had a cola scented gel pen and would fill in an entire page and just sniff it.

Early on in the show Phil thought he swallowed a fly and started choking. He then yelled for a "minion" to fetch him water. Dan was taken back by this and it was about a minute before a crew member walked on with his water bottle.

(I'm sensing this show is a lot of Phil saying off-script random shit and dan being shocked by him. Which honestly checks out.)

"Jesus but more shippable" IM SORRY WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY DAN

Phil said reject modernity embrace tradition correctly.

They still think the phanniversary was "last month."

Everyone yelling "gay" together in unison was so healing.

Phil messed up the song lyric again and said "I got the tattoo" instead of "you"

SISTER DANIEL HOLY FUCK WHERE DO I BEGIN. I was in the 4th row on the left side which is where she stood. I knew all the spoilers going into it BUT NOTHING COULD HAVE PREPARED ME. I screamed at the top of my lungs when I first saw her come out. I AM SO THANKFUL FOR THE PRIVILEGE OF GETTING TO SEE HER IN PERSON I WILL NEVER TAKE THAT FOR GRANTED. She is so AAAH. Religious, eye-opening experiences were certainly had. AND SHE WAS IN DOC MARTENS. I'm never gonna be able to put into words how feral she made me.

I would say that I was very familiar with the show content before I got there. But in reality, everything was 100x weirder than I thought it would be. I mean that in the best way possible!!! Dnp were OFF. THE. RAILS. They were still the same people you see in the videos, but uncut and UNLEASHED.

AND THEN THERE WAS THE FACT THAT I WENT HOME WITH AN ACTUAL PROP?!?!?!

At the end of the show, I rushed to the front of the stage to steal the confetti. (I'm a hoe for collecting show confetti, I did the same thing at WAD).

Whilst I was collecting confetti and taking pics of Carlos, one of the stagehands came out a few times, handing out the Australian props to random people standing at the stage.

THIS IS THE GREATEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO ME!!! Here are some close-up photos I took of Obi Wan, and a video of what he can do (x). I walked into TIT with a Sister Daniel and Father Philip doll, and I came out of TIT with Phobi Phan Phenobi.

I also got one of the role model or no-le model cards, it is blank on the other side apart from their signature.

I also got to get up and close with other people's props. I even got to play Max's ukulele. I played the TIT song and I can tell you first hand that that thing was VERY out of tune. I know Dan was only fake playing it, but at least tune it first 😂.

The day after, a big group of us went to Auckland Zoo! Man that was a lot of fun. We signed TABINOFs, and I got a bunchhhh of pics of Phobi Wan, my photo dump is here (x). @spanielt0wel also got a doll, so I made sure to get some photos with them together.

The post-tit depression is REALLLLLL. I miss being surrounded by like minded people. It was so easy to unmask and just be completely myself. I have never felt more like me than when I was surrounded by all the queer, neurodivergent phannies. This was the happiest I've felt in years. So thank you from the bottom of my heart to everyone who came to talk to me, and to all the friends I've made through the discord 💙.

Now I am back home and terrible influencing up my room cause I never want to forget this amazing experience.

The box frame was inspired by this one

The posters I got signed are looking GOOOOOD. Also Phobi Wan looks so silly sitting with my monster high dolls. I'm gonna treasure him forever. HE MAKES ME SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also thank you to everyone who voted on my poll you've convinced me that #4 is the way to go and I shall be ordering that flag soon.

THANK YOU TIT AUCKLAND

[blueishspace]

Hero, Villain God 37

(Prev) (Next) (First)

*Grian's pov*

Boogeyman calls you, well he calls Mother Spore, using Grumbot. How exciting, last time he was the one to call you it ended up being so much fun... you haven't done anything as Mother Spore in soooo long.

So you make your way to the lab, do the classic dramatic entrance by appearing behind him... this time around he doesn't look nearly as scared as when you appeared in his lab that first time, just a bit surprised and not even that much.

Oh no, you can't believe this is actually happening...it's too soon! Is he perhaps...getting used to Mother Sore dropping in unannounced? That just won't do, you'll have to change it up a bit- Oh right, he asked for you to come here for some reason so he was probably expecting you to appear like this. . . You are still going to mix things up just to be sure, you are going to be extra unpredictable.

... You should probably ask why he wanted you here.

"You asked for me?"

"Spore. I have need for you."

Ohhh just Spore? Not even the full title? That's new too!

"I see, and what is that you need me for?"

"I have another important meeting I would like you to chaperone."

Oh last time was fun, you could work with that again.

"Where?"

"Out of town. It's in a place called Las Nevadas, have you heard of it?"

...

You haven't actually, is that a new thing? Well, you can't exactly tell him that without losing the whole cool and threatening factor you have as Mother Spore... You'll have to figure it out.

"And when will this ...meeting take place?"

"...Do you have anything else to do in the near future?"

Oh he's paranoid huh? Is he worried you are working with other villains on the side? ... Well, technically you are but that's not the point.

"Depends."

He narrows his eyes, he stops it immediately but you notice, you definitely notice. Aha! Take that Pearl, you aren't blind!

"It's on the evening of the 26th"

"I see"

The 26th? Again? There is a difference between chance and this, some of the other gods are getting involved! That's exciting! ...but also very rude of them, not even saying hi... Well then, if the want to do it like this then you are going to give them quite the show. After all you are here to have fun and everyone loves free entertainment.

"Well?"

Right, Boogeyman, need to answer.

"I'll be there"

"As I thought... yes"

"Now I'll take my leave unless ...you have anything else to ask of me Boogeyman."

"There is something actually"

Wait, really? Why did he wait so long?

"Oh?"

"Why did you send those crooks to Cuteguy's inauguration?"

Ah, so Grumbot must have told him. You guess you should have predicted that since you didn't exactly tell the machine not to. Damn, you were almost getting excited too.

"That my dear Boogeyman is something that does not involve you."

"You used my artificial inteligence, the one I created to plan it, I should at least know the reason"

"Oh you don't understand, that isn't for you to know quite yet"

You caress his cheek, he freezes under your stare.

"If the time comes that it may involve you then I will reveal everything."

". . ."

He doesn't respond, you turn and just like that you are gone... You have a situation to deal with.

*End of Chapter 8*

[peppermintquartz]

Firefly | Chapter 1

Happy Holidays from @quintessenceofdust88 and me! The first chapter of Firefly is up now ☃️

***

‘Can we talk?'  

Delete.

---

'Evan’ 

Backspace backspace backspace. Pause. Backspace.

---

‘Buck, I need to tell you sth...'  

Delete.

---

‘I'm pregnant' 

Yeah, that one's a hard delete, Kinard. 

---

Tommy's thumbs hover over his screen, and he sighs, feeling even more nauseous than he's been feeling the past few weeks. He stares at the three positive pregnancy tests in the counter top, and a single tear rolls down his cheek. He swipes it off his cheek with the edge of his palm.

He has always been so careful, but then Evan Buckley came into his life and, for six glorious months, Tommy forgot to be careful in all the ways that mattered. And now, of all times…

He thought about keeping it from Evan, but that thought lasted half a second. Tommy can't do that; not when he knows how good the other man is with kids, not when he knows how much he longs for fatherhood. In six months he has never been able to deny Evan Buckley anything except a key to his locked up heart.

And even then, Evan found a way in, made a home in a dusty corner, infused everything with his essence. Tommy takes a deep breath. He's tried evicting the Evan still living inside his heart for the past three weeks, and he has not succeeded.

Besides, there's the baby to consider. Tommy cannot, in good conscience, keep his child from a good father when he spent his whole childhood longing for one. Not even to protect his own heart.

(If it had been the other way round, Evan would tell him about it as soon as he's certain. Because Evan was honest like that. And Tommy wants to learn to be like that, for the baby.)

“It's alright, Firefly,” he whispers, his hand cradling his still flat belly. “Daddy will figure out a way to tell your other daddy. And he'll love you, I just know it; he'll love you so much.”

And for Tommy, that'll have to be enough.

After another three hours, he finally finds the words.

‘I need to tell you something in person. Come to my place after shift please?’

[read more on AO3]

[itsallmouthwashing]

Tulpar- Band AU, Character descriptions

I cannot draw- so have some written descriptions and tidbits about the members of Tulpar! I'm planning more bullet points tomorrow but contemplating how much I want to give away ;)

It's very late, I want to add more but I also want to get these OUT! I have much much more planned so don't worry all the details will come out

Bullet Points here

ANYA

Our goth bhaddie

Mid-short black hair, undyed (a NATURAL goth queen)

Usually with purple eyeshadow and black lipstick. Her makeup isnt too intricate, but sometimes she likes to do a classic goth look (white foundation, black EVERYWHERE, the works) when she’s feeling fancy. Later when their band goes much more hardcore, she rocks the look more often. It makes her feel powerful and confident on stage!

YES she has Doc Martens. NO she doesn't wear them. They make her FEET HURT!!!

Still likes jogging! Is that jog to the nearest Burger King? Sometimes! 

Her first tattoo is the one she gets with the crew when Tulpar gets signed :)

Has her ears and her bottom lip pierced. She plays with her lip piercing when she’s studying

She picked up bass at 12 

Does Daisuke’s and Curly’s makeup sometimes :)

Perfer’s purple nail polish :)

DAISUKE

I put in my Ghost Adventure’s AU that Dai would have dyed his hair pink or purple, so this barbie has pink hair :) He’s got a purple fringe :) Probably short-- think about base game Sims 4 short emo hair-- that one!

Loves to paint his and the crews nails, especially for concerts! It happens so often that it becomes ritual and start times will go over if they aren't finished in time. Daisuke WILL get this hand right and the fans WILL understand (they always do!)

Loves to pair undershirts with his collection of Hawaiian shirts. Of course, his pink hibiscus is a staple, but so is the mesh/fishnet unders he puts on when he starts to transition to an alternative style. 

picked up drums around 15, but got really focused on it and mastered them fairly quickly before they went pro

Prefers his nail polish to match with his shirt that day!

JIMMY

Does not have dyed hair either, but he likes to keep it long-ish. It hides his face better but also gets in the way when he doesn't want it to. 

Had a battle jacket, but the sleeves got damaged when he hosted a bonfire and he did not pay attention to the fucking bonfire. That's alright though, he turned into a battle vest!

Overall more of a grunge aesthetic/style

YES his crust pants are REAL stop ASKING HIM !! 

Songwriting has been a part of him since he was little. it was his way to vent, a way to cope, a way to be in control of the narrative

Didn't know when he was younger, but Jimmy has perfect pitch. When he figures this out, he boasts about it in his guitar classes

Buuuuuut it just means the other kids asked him to turn their guitars. That stopped very quickly after he smashed someone's guitar.

Picked up guitar when he was 8. His dad was going to throw it out, but little Jimmy insisted he keep it and that he would find someone who would buy it off of him. Maybe a teacher at school or something.

But instead go buying it from him, a teacher sits him down and teaches him how to play. He gets so lost in it, he begs the teacher to keep it here and teach him more after school. That teacher also teaches him how to write music!

Learns how to do makeup because he’s jealous of Anya- always touching his face so gently to fix his makeup. Quickly learns that all he can really do is his own eyeliner, and even then it’s mid

He’s trying though! (when Jimmy clams the fuck down he eventually goes to Anya and asks her to teach him. They have a nice bonding moment. (the worms demand more, so more there will be- here when I post)

Prefers black nail polish, demands he does it himself (Curly convinces him to let Dai do with Jimmy can't get his hands to stop shaking before a concert. Dai continues to do them after)

Bracelets and chains out the waazoo. When he warms up enough, he lets the band borrow some for shows. (Dai does attempt to actually steal one at some point. Jimmy breaks his nose over it (The worms have plans, you’ll find out why!)

Will! It! Boof! Welcome to Jimmy’s favorite game show! Can it be smoked? He’s fucking got it baybeeee!!

That is to say, he smokes cigarettes, vapes, weed, carts, dabs- yeah man. At least the things that wont get him in serious trouble with the law (at least… not for a little bit…) 

CURLY

The oldest of the group, beside Swansea when he makes his appearance. 

Mid-short blond hair, also undyed. He does get a perm sometimes. When Jimmy does missing, he has a full breakdown and dyes his hair black, but that's later that's later thatslaterthatdlater

Has snakebites and an eyebrow piercing 

Nipple piercings WHO SAID THAT 

When the band goes pro, Pony Express records demands the front man have a certain image because thats what’s hot with audiences and they need to bring in as much revenue as possible with their first album or they get dropped 

Picked up guitar freshman year of high school when he was accidentally enrolled in a guitar class. Some kid said he had perfect pitch, and Curly thought he would be the perfect person to ask about turning his guitar

Only he misunderstood. Though he asked him to tune it for him- Maybe he heard someone ask him about that earlier? He took the guitar with a smile, then smashed It to the ground like he was killing a bug.

The end of freshman year, just before the final for the class, some kid came up to him to tell him his instrument was out of tune. and that he could show him if he'd like. So he doesn't get bumped a letter grade, ya know?

The kid tunes it- just in time, because Grant's name was just called from the now empty class room.

Sophomore year, Curly is enrolled in a choir class, where he discovers his love and talent for singing. Sometimes when he does solos in the classroom, he feels someone watching him from the window in the door.

Prefers yellow nail polish! He loves the contrast of his nails against his outfit since he’s usually in all back 

Wears mostly suits. It's what his parents put him in growing up, so he has a ton and they just feel natural. Does it hurt when Jimmy convinces him to rip them up for a concert? Only a little ;-; Does it make the audience go wild? Only a lot :) 

Wears Jimmy’s chains way before the rest of Tulpar have access to them 

SWANSEA

Tulapr’s manager before and after they get signed with Pony Express Records. 

Usually wears a track suit or something, very casual around the crew. After they get signed though, hes always dressing in P.E records merch, ad later Tulpar merch when PER authorizes it!

Keeping his backstory mostly the same, his struggle with addiction does come into play with the story I have in mind 

Used to be really into the punk scene. If you loook really close, you can see the holes from his snakebites and brow bars. No one can see it, but he also used to have a septum piercing. 

He has a stash of his old clothes on the bus when Tulpar is tour-ready! He also becomes the resident seamstress if a costume rips or malfunctions :)