#and you think you’re worthy of his FRIENDSHIP

[waynes-multiverse]

Glad to hear the tête-à-tête with Ted went as expected 😂

Let's dive into this wonderful comment! 🤍

Seeing a glimpse of their growing friendship in the first flashback scene was somehow both sweet and bittersweet, but of course, there’s also that hint of “more” on Beau’s side that he’s desperately trying to hide. 😅

Definitely bittersweet 😭 Makes you really feel for Beau. What an incredibly tough situation to be in, honestly 💔

Loll not the dad voice! So sweet that he tried to “cut her off,” even though he ultimately wasn’t successful. Always more shit hitting the fan, isn’t there? 😬

Yup, and they both know it. They've picked a very hard job 😅 But it's hard to resist the dad voice! But there's understanding on both sides. Beau, for sure, knows what it's like to be obsessed with a case 🙈

That’s what makes their situation all the harder – the fact that she’s in law enforcement as well and understands this aspect of things all too well. 😰 It’s truly amazing that she and Beau were able to get past this hurdle and actually fall in love. It shows how forgiving she is, I think.

Yes, this 💯 And I definitely see her as forgiving. She knows who the real enemy is, and it ain't Beau. She knows even good people can make mistakes. Part of the job. Tragic, but it happens 🤷‍♀️ Plus, I think considering her own hidden feelings for him, she had an easier time seeing past all that.

HELP. I’m deceased. 🤣🤣🤣 I was smirking/laughing throughout this entire exchange, but this in particular took me out! Ted has nothing but audacity. But at least the reader had Beau’s back on this one. 😆

Glad that exchange made you laugh! I honeslty love writing those ridiculous scenes. This one reminded me somewhat of Ben vs. Colt in Rehab 😂

I imagine Ted as some stuck-up, somewhat bougeois prosecutor that both Beau and Randy talked a lot of shit about behind his back. So Beau's not only offended she dated him for himself, but probably for Randy too 🤣

Ahh, nice that they had this heart to heart, and also this revelation. But while of course that really does nothing to soothe Beau’s guilt, at least it allows her to forgive him.

I saw this mostly as an attempt to soothe Beau's guilt. You can tell she was still a bit judgmental in her thoughts à la "Well, I, the genius, wouldn't have done it/seen right through it, but oh well, guess not everyone can be me..." 😅

Eventually, she forgave him either way because she knows the risks and dangers of the job and that not every decision you make will be the right one in the end

LMAO Oh Beau. You’re right, it is funny to imagine him saying “slimy coyote.” 😂 Bet this is what he wishes would happen to Ted:

Oh, he for sure wanted to Wile E. Coyote Ted 🤣🤣

Oooh what a declaration that is from her! The fact that Beau’s the best she’s ever had, even including Randy, I’m assuming. 😅

Well, there's two options lol, right? Either she only said it to make him feel better, knowing his insecurities. Or, it's fully true and she decided to go for it. I honestly think it's the second. Beau seems to match her energy a bit better than Randy probably did 😂🔥

And Beau, sweet Beau, that was a beautiful rom-com worthy line right there. 💗

Ikr? Imagine Carla hearing that! She'd be livid 😂😂 But I enjoyed playing with the lines there of "first loves" vs. "true loves"

Ooh shit, Diane is certainly up to something. 😬😬

Oh boy, we all should be concerned! She might have some (deathly) surprises up her sleeve... 👀

Polaris – Chapter 7

Series Summary: When Beau Arlen moved to Montana, he left behind a past he wasn’t proud of. But when a series of murders requires the FBI’s help, Sheriff Arlen‘s ghosts come back to haunt him one by one. With a wrong turn waiting at every crossroads, it’s hard to make the right choices and find his way back home – back to you.

Pairing: Beau Arlen x FBI Agent!Reader

Warnings: 18+, fluff, angst, serial killer, mentions of cartels, grief, smut

Word Count: 7.2k

A/N: The chapter where we find out why Ted is on Beau's punch list aka The One With Ted... 😂

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Chapter 7: Storm Coming

May 2021

“I sold the house,” you said, your voice ripping through the quiet of the car during another starry stake-out night.

“So you’re homeless now?” Beau joked and peeled his eyes away from the front window view and glanced at you from the driver’s seat, his hand resting on the steering wheel, the other one in his lap.

You chuckled. “Yup, but I got a hot plate now in my motel room and one of those Italian moka pots. So, you know, some would say I’m living the dream.”

Beau snorted in amusement before he pensively rubbed his mouth with two fingers. “You didn’t have to sell the house, you know?”

You heaved a sigh. “Yeah, I kinda did, though… I didn’t like staying in there anymore. It’s just… too many memories, I guess? ‘Sides, I’m always down here anyways. Actually considering moving here.”

Beau frowned at you, his nose scrunching. “What, to Mexico? Are you nuts? Over my dead body are you doin’ that.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you had a say in it,” you retorted rather playfully and put a shocked palm on your chest in mock.

“Damn right, I do,” Beau scoffed his reply with a teasing grin. “Who do you think is lookin’ out for ya, huh?”

“Wait, you think you are? That’s what you believe?” You snorted a laugh, entering banter territory with him.

It was usually how you passed your time during most of these stake-outs – laughing, teasing, and the occasional talking about your problems. You’d never known Beau like this before. He was your husband’s best friend, but he had been more of an acquaintance to you. Now, after months of spending close to every day together, it felt like he was your best friend. Since Randy’s death, he’d been there for you, even if it was mostly out of guilt.

“Yeah, what d’you think?” Beau countered challengingly.

“Oh sweetie, you’re not looking after me. I’m looking after you,” you stated confidently. The smile that twitched on his lips seemed to actually agree with you. “Out of the two of us, you’re the way bigger wreck. Some would even think it’s your husband who died, not mine.”

“Are you calling me a girl?”

You coolly shrugged your shoulders. “Either I’m calling you a girl, or I’m calling you gay. I’ll let you pick.”

Laughingly, Beau scoffed and muttered, “You wish I was gay.”

However, you still heard his mumbled reply and responded, “Actually, I wish you were a girl and that I was gay.”

Beau stared at you and leaned back against the door for a better view of you, his brow raised and the corners of his lips drawn slightly upwards in amusement. “What are we even talking about?”

“I don’t know,” you admitted with a shake of your head.

The two of you then burst into loud laughter that filled the entire SUV. For a moment, all your sorrows and hardships seemed to be forgotten, carried away to the desert with the nightly breeze. Then, the familiar and comfortable quiet took over the car again.

“I’m moving out of the house, too,” Beau said, his eyes focusing on the barren landscape and desolate road ahead. “I’m giving it to Carla. I mean, she didn’t ask me to. God knows she can take care of herself… But I want Emily to keep living in the home she grew up in, you know?”

“Yeah, I get that. That’s really nice,” you said quietly. Your soft smile then morphed to a grin. “So you’re homeless, too, huh?”

Beau laughed, throwing his head back into the seat. “Yeah, guess I am. Maybe we should live together?” he suggested half-jokingly.

“Like roommates? Ugh, God no!” You scoffed in abhorrence. “We’re way too old for that. You’re over forty, I’m barely in my thirties–”

“You do know I know exactly how old you really are, right?” Beau teased.

You decided to ignore that jab and continued, unbothered. “It would be seriously so sad. The Widow And The Divorcee – sounds like the worst sitcom on the planet. ‘Sides, it’d be super awkward if one of us starts dating again.”

“Fine, maybe you’re right,” Beau relented with a soft chuckle and then glanced at you sideways. His heart gained speed in his chest. “You ever think about it? Dating? Gettin’ out there again? Been nine months.”

You twitched your shoulders, choosing not to look at him. “I don’t know. Is nine months long enough after your husband died?”

Thoughtfully, Beau licked his lips and let out a small sigh. “I don’t think there’s a timeline, or a right and wrong. I just think it’s one of those things that when you’re ready, you’re ready.”
 “Well, consider me not ready then, I guess,” you replied honestly.

“Alright,” Beau accepted, bobbing his head. “But I still think you should try again at some point, you know? You shouldn’t be alone for the rest of your life. First of all, it’d be a total waste, ‘cause, I mean, look at you. And secondly, you’re barely in your thirties, after all,” he repeated your earlier joke with a soft grin.

You felt the heat creep to your cheeks in the moonlight. As you looked at him, you could see his smirk, making you laugh. “Noted,” you replied and were thankful for his pep talk. “I mean, there’ve been offers.”

Beau quirked one eyebrow, a hard lump forming in his throat as his chest tightened. “Offers? Like plural? Who?”

“Well, just some of the guys from our team. Cody, Jordan, Ted…” you named a few. “Also a few locals. Remember those guys we played pool with a few weeks ago? Two of ‘em asked for my number.”

“Huh. That is plural…” Beau pursed his lips and couldn’t keep his brow from wrinkling, his grip on the steering wheel stiffening. “Well, you know, when you’re not ready, you’re not ready. Shouldn’t force anything. No rush, darlin’.”

Smooth, Beau thought wryly with an internal sigh.

“Right, I know,” you agreed. “I do miss sex, though. Getting kinda bored of my vibrator.”

Beau choked on his spit. “Jesus…”

“What? Am I not allowed to talk about it? I thought we were friends. You’re supposed to care about my well-being and happiness,” you argued, frowning.

“I do care. Just… Can we please not talk about that?” he begged and exhaled a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his freckled nose.

“Fine. I miss having women around…” You shrugged and muttered, “Didn’t peg you for a prude.”

“Okay, let’s just get one thing straight – I’m not a prude,” he clarified in defense, his cheeks turning a deep shade of red.

“Alright, also noted,” you quipped, smirking to yourself. Sometimes you enjoyed making him a little uncomfortable. His blushed cheeks could be quite cute. “What about you? Have you still not talked to Carla? I’m sure you can win her back if you tried. You’re a lot better now.”

“Well, thank you for the, uh, vote of confidence, but it’s really over, I guess. We just talked about all the divorce proceedings last time. I actually think she started datin’ someone recently,” Beau told you.

Your eyebrows rose in surprise. “Really? Who?”

“I guess some rich tech guy. I don’t know…”

“And you’re good with that?” you questioned in disbelief.

Beau scoffed a humorless chuckle, shaking his head. “Ha, no… But what am I gonna do? Kinda shot myself in the leg with that one. I don’t blame her for moving on. It’s been over for months now.”

“That sucks. I’m sorry. I was kinda rooting for you two,” you admitted.

“Well, thanks, but we weren’t you and Randy,” Beau said. It made your brow knit.

“What d’you mean?”

“C’mon, you know what I mean,” Beau replied as if it were obvious, but you still shook your head. He sighed. “You and Randy would’ve never gotten divorced.”

“You don’t know that.” Honestly, you doubted it yourself, but you were too curious to find out what he meant by his statement.

“I do know that,” Beau insisted with certainty. “You guys had that once-in-a-lifetime kinda love. The kind that made other people jealous, you know? Your love made every other relationship pale in comparison. I always figured once the honeymoon phase was over, you’d settle and be less vomit-inducing, but that never happened. Me and Carla were never like that. Not even in the beginning,” he explained, a small, soft smile shaping his mouth. “You guys were special. True love. The stuff folk singers write cheesy songs about.”

“I guess we were,” you mused quietly, the memory of everything Randy was to you causing tears to well in your eyes.

“Hey, I’m sorry,” Beau apologized as soon as he noticed the sadness on your face. He reached his hand over to your side and squeezed your thigh gently, just above the knee.

“No, it’s alright,” you brushed him off, swallowing your heartache down. “But hey, if Carla wasn’t your once-in-a-lifetime, maybe she’s still out there. You just haven’t found her yet. I mean, that’s kinda a nice outlook, right?”

Licking his lips, he bobbed his head, his gaze focused on his hand on the steering wheel. “I doubt it.”

“Why? Never say never,” you said encouragingly.

“Well, maybe I already met her, and it’s too late now,” he replied. It sounded more like an actual fact than a hypothetical theory. You found yourself wondering.

“What, did you have like an old college flame? The one that got away?” you teased lightheartedly, but he only grew more serious.

“Somethin’ like that,” he replied vaguely, rubbing his mouth with his fingers.

“Look her up on Facebook. Maybe she’s divorced, too. You could reconnect or something,” you suggested. He nodded but didn’t seem too convinced. You then shot him a hesitant glance from your periphery. “So, now that Carla’s moving on, are you gonna start dating now, too? Jump back into the game?”

“I guess so… Why?” A part of him was curious to hear your response, while another part reminded him that his desired answer was only wishful thinking – and completely insane on top of that.

“That fiery brunette lady at the bar last night seemed really interested in you. Maybe you should hook up with her if she’s there again tomorrow night?” you proposed in earnest.

Wide-eyed, Beau blinked at you in incredulity – like you had lost your goddamn mind. “I’m sorry, what?! Hook up? Who are you right now? Are you tryin’ to set me up?”

“Yeah.” You shrugged simply, not seeing what the big problem was. “Don’t look at me like I’m trying to convince you to get a tramp stamp above your ass with a dirty needle. I’m just trying to be a good wingman… woman. Randy would’ve tried to set you up, right?”

Beau sighed frustratedly. “Yeah, he would’ve,” he admitted in a grumble and then barked, slightly more furious, “But you ain’t him. And I don’t want you to be, so stop it, alright?”

“Geez, I’m sorry. I was just trying to help,” you mumbled defensively and raised your hands in surrender, unsuccessfully hiding your upset over his reaction. He felt guilty when he saw the small pout on your face.

Beau rubbed his forehead before dragging his palm over the rest of his face. “I know. I’m sorry, too,” he said and let out a deep breath through his nose. “I just-… I guess I’m just waiting, okay?”

“Waiting for what?”

Beau squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. For you to be ready, he wanted to say. But he couldn’t very well do that now, could he?

“For Christ’s sake, Y/N…” he breathed exhaustively. That was all he managed to say. With his palm on his mouth, he rested his elbow against the car door, gazing out the window.

“Why are you so upset?” you asked, your brow woven with confusion.

“Switch subjects,” he requested.

It was a phrase the two of you used whenever you didn’t want to talk about something anymore. When someone pushed too much, or the topic got too emotional and you needed a break. The only rule was to always respect the request, so you had no choice but to let it go after that.

“The Texans game sucked last night, huh?”

That elicited a snort from him, and he looked at you with a warm smile. “Yeah, goddamn awful.”

“How many times are you gonna watch those?”

Beau’s question broke your concentration. Your gaze snapped from your laptop screen to his concerned face. You’d been rewatching the victims’ videos for four days straight now, trying to find more clues. Maybe even something that directly led to Diane.

“I keep thinking maybe I’ve missed something,” you mumbled and stared back into the computer, your teeth gnawing on the pen between your lips. “It’s 48 hours each. We have twenty-four victims. I keep watching them sped-up to get through them all, but maybe I should slow ‘em down. I mean, I’ve watched them full-length, normal speed a couple of times before, but maybe I should watch ‘em even slower and really focus, you know? There’s gotta be something there…”

Bobbing his head worriedly, Beau pursed his lips and took a scan of your desk. He counted eight empty cups of coffee and five cans of energy drinks. There were bags under your red eyes and your hands were jittering. He knew you hadn’t slept a lot. He tried to hold you in his arms, but as soon as he dozed off, you snuck out and went back to work.

Beau shut the laptop. “You’re cut off.”

“Hey!”

“Y/N, you need to sleep. Just look at you, darlin’. This obsession isn’t healthy. I’m taking you home,” he declared sternly, ignoring your protests. You were pretty sure he had used his dad voice, too.

“Y/N, you need to sleep. Just look at you, darlin’. This obsession isn’t healthy. I’m taking you home,” he declared sternly, ignoring your protests. You were pretty sure he had used his dad voice, too.

“I need that woman in prison, Beau.”

“You startin’ to sound like Jenny…” Beau quipped under his breath.

“We’re running out of time. There’s only one day left before the next victim drops,” you stated and tried your best to keep your voice steady as it broke off towards the end.

“I know.” Beau clasped your shoulder and squeezed gently. “And we’ll get her. I promise you. But you’re no good to any of us if you’re exhausted and losing it right now.” You nodded and rose from your chair. He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you flush against him, kissing the top of your head affectionately. “How about some dinner, huh?”

You grinned warmly. “What, like a second date?”

“Exactly like a second date,” Beau said and mirrored your grin. He was making up for lost time as best as he could, even if it meant taking you out every night for the rest of your life.

Your phone buzzed on the table, your brow quirking at the number. Eagerly, you picked up and wound yourself out of Beau’s embrace. “Special Agent Y/L/N… Uh-huh… Great, thank you.”

Beau pursed his lips. “We’re not going out, are we?”

“‘fraid not, Sheriff.” You shook your head and chuckled at his groan. “That was IT. They’re finally done and sending over the IP addresses.”

“Alright, guess I’m gettin’ take out,” Beau announced with a small sigh, knowing the two of you were in for a long night – and not the one he had planned.

You smiled and pecked his lips. “Thank you.”

August 2020

Beau’s heart thudded frantically in his chest as his knuckles tapped your front door in the early evening. The sky was a color spectacle full of azures, indigos, and apricots as the summer sun slowly set. His boots only stood on that same spot not even twenty-four hours ago. It still felt like a surreal nightmare he couldn’t escape, his hope to wake up soon a ceaseless prayer.

He’d stayed with you all night, held you as you cried yourself to sleep. Beau awoke on your couch with your head resting on his thigh and a strange feeling in his gut. He couldn’t help but think you were beautiful, even in a state of utter turmoil, shoving said thought swiftly down into the depths of his darkening soul.

But he’d spent all day thinking of you, plagued by guilt and torn by misplaced feelings. He’d sat through hours of interviews, going over and over the events of last night till his mind spun like a hamster wheel. He was forced to fill out forms, sign documents, and recount each unforgettable step. He’d listened to lectures, sermons, and admonitions. His captain gave him a tongue-lashing that sounded like mere white noise before he was sent home with a suspension – investigation pending.

Only he didn’t go home; he came here.

At home, his wife and daughter were waiting – for a husband, a father, an explanation. None of which he could provide. Beau wanted to wallow in his grief, his guilt, his loss in peace. He lacked the strength to be strong, play pretend, and act above it all. He wanted to be punished, sent to perdition, and held accountable for his lapse of judgment. A suspension wasn’t good enough. It barely patched the abysmal gaps in his heart.

The only suitable punishment was you. Witnessing your suffering was his personally crafted hell. You were the broken remnants of his destruction, the shattered pieces of his idiocy, the explosive fallout of his arrogance.

And you hadn’t answered a single call or text of his. His torturous worry was part of his penalty.

Consecutive rings of the doorbell and incessant knocks remained unanswered. For a moment, Beau rested his forehead on the door. He felt helpless and clueless all the same. You had friends and family to take care of you, probably better suited and closer to you than him, but somehow he felt burdened with the responsibility.

He took the spare key out of the left-side planter and barged inside. The ground floor was deserted. Last night’s uneaten dinner still sat untouched on the table. It felt like a whiplash against his bare back.

Bolting upstairs, he found the door to the main bedroom ajar. He pried it open slowly, the sight of you delivering his second lashing. This time, he felt the sting burning through to his heart.

He found you curled up in bed, on your husband’s side, in your husband’s t-shirt, with your wedding photo album clutched tightly in your arms. His breath halted for a moment; his heart did, too.

Did he do this? Was this all his fault?

“Y/N?” His deep voice was quiet and careful as he spoke. Slowly, he walked over to your side and knelt down in front of you. “Darlin’, hey… You need to get up. Eat somethin’.”

Beau was sure you hadn’t moved all day. He didn’t ask you if you were alright or how you were doing. The question seemed insulting. The answer was obvious. Your phone was lighting up on the nightstand with a million unanswered calls and messages, his own among them. Your beautiful eyes were vacant, red, and empty. You didn’t cry, however, not anymore. You were dehydrated and all out of tears at this point. You never looked at him, not even a glance.

“I want him back,” you whispered, your voice coarse from screaming, crying, cursing.

Beau nodded, licking his lips. Caringly, he caressed your head, brushing a few strands of messy hair out of your face. “I know. I hope you know I’d trade places with him in a heartbeat if I could.”

For the first time your eyes found his. Your gaze was scathing and piercing. “Tell me what happened.”

Beau let out a harrowing sigh. He had rehashed the story all day long. He wasn’t sure if he could do it again, but maybe this version was the most important one. Who deserved the truth more than you?

“Y/N, I don’t think this is such a good idea, darlin’,” Beau tried to reason, mostly for himself. He wanted to hold on a little longer, the idea of you hating him tearing him apart. He wanted to spare himself the additional guilt, the anger, the hurt.

“Tell me or leave.”

Beau closed his eyes and nodded hesitantly. “Okay, alright.” He took a deep breath and settled down on the floor, leaning his back against the wooden bedside table. “We were closing in on that biker gang. Few murders, arms trafficking, drug deals… You know the drill. I’m sure Ra-… he filled you in.”

Not that long ago, Randy had asked you for advise on the case. You gave him your contacts in the DEA and a number to a CI.

“Your DEA guy warned us. Said the gang was working closely with the cartel down in Juárez. But I had my own intel that only a few members were meeting at the Hatcher warehouse in MacGregor. It was supposed to be a small deal. But I figured it could lead to bigger things if we shook ‘em down, you know? But fuckin’ Harper told us no like usual. Refused to give us back-up. Said to pass the case on to the DEA. But Randy and I worked our asses off the last few months to get even this far. We were so close. I didn’t wanna let go… So, I suggested we go in anyways. It was supposed to be only three guys from the gang. I knew if we were smart about it, we could easily take ‘em down, you know?”

You rolled onto your back and propped yourself up on the bed. Shaking your head, you chuckled humorlessly and grabbed the half-empty whiskey bottle from the nightstand. “‘Course you did. It’s not the first time you broke a rule or shit on authority.”

“Yeah, and I was right every single time,” Beau bit. His anger wasn’t geared at you but at himself. He knew he was in the wrong. He flew too close to the sun and got burned. But he still felt the need to defend himself, even if it was unjustified.

His gaze drifted to the dresser and the patch of wall above it, decorated with photographic evidence of yours and his partner’s life together. The wedding, dates, vacations, holidays – it was all there. Beau had watched it all, start to finish. He wished he could rewind the tape and cut off the ending, all so you could have the love of your life back. He didn’t know yet your cassette had a B-side. One that featured him.

“You got fucking lucky, is all,” you scoffed.

“Randy backed me up on it!”

“Of course he did! You’re his fucking partner! He would’ve followed you anywhere if you asked him to,” you snapped, shaking your head. You gulped down some whiskey then and locked your jaw before you met his eyes again with a glare. “And? What happened then, Beau? Was it only three guys?”

“No.” The word was almost inaudible. He shook his head with a harsh swallow. “They were meetin’ with a few cartel members there. My intel never said anything about that. When we were inside and saw what was really going on, it was already too late to get out. They made us, bullets started flyin’… They got a hold of Randy and… shot him.” A tear escaped down his cheek, his throat closing as he tried to choke out the last bit of the story. “I had to leave him there. I barely got out myself. I’m sorry, Y/N. I know this is on me.”

Your lips twitched with a bitter smile. You didn’t look at him, just rubbed your tired eyes. “Damn right it is. Get out.”

“Y/N, please–”

The storm in your eyes made him stop as you met his gaze, his useless apologies becoming stuck in his throat. “I said, get out. I ain’t asking a third time. You’re the reason my husband is dead. You’re the reason I don’t even have a body to bury. So, get the fuck out.” Like a snakebite, your words were targeted, sharp, and venomous.

You finally got out of bed and prodded towards the en-suite bathroom. The truth had been what you needed to switch the fighter inside of you back on. You knew what you wanted to do then and were determined to get it.

“Y/N–”

“Do you know what cartels do to bodies, Beau? To rivals? To law enforcement? ‘Cause I just came back from a job where we found forty-eight decapitated bodies, left to rot inside the walls of a house. Still haven’t found the heads yet. Probably never will,” you told him and stared him dead into his dark green eyes. “Ever seen that before, desperado?”

Beau bit his lips, averting his gaze. “No.”

“Yeah, didn’t think so.” You scoffed and crossed your arms over your chest. “Now, leave. Please. Get the fuck outta my house. I don’t wanna see you anymore,” you spat and slammed the bathroom door shut behind you.

Beau then grabbed the whiskey bottle you’d left and walked out of your home. It was the first of many nights he started to drink himself to sleep, but at least it kept the nightmares temporarily at bay.

“Theodore.” Beau forced a bright smile onto his freckle-dusted face, although the stiff features could barely fool anyone. At least, they wouldn’t have fooled you.

“Beau, good to see you again.” Ted smiled and did a more convincing job of it as he waltzed into Lewis and Clark County’s Sheriff’s Department. It almost seemed like he meant it. “I was surprised when Y/N told me you got a gig as a sheriff here.”

Translation: I was surprised because you were such a fuck-up back in Texas.

Beau feigned a chuckle. “Yeah, I bet you were.”

“Hopefully, you’re givin’ the DAs here less headaches,” Ted jabbed under the disguise of friendly banter. He then turned to Jenny with that same shit-eating grin. “Your sheriff is a little troublemaker.”

Sweet Lord, Beau wanted to whack the bastard.

The blonde deputy coolly brushed the accusation off. She shrugged and playfully nudged Beau’s arm, sending the Texan attorney a smile. “I prefer him that way.”

“Hey, there she is!” Beau smiled with frazzled relief when you finally hurried into the station. A little while longer, and he definitely would’ve thrown a punch.

“Hey, Ted. Thanks for coming. How was your flight?” You greeted him with a warm smile and a quick hug.

“Good, good. Never been to Montana before,” Ted said and then let his eyes wander up and down your body. “Look at you. You look great!”

“Oh, uh, thanks.” You subtly cleared your throat. You could physically feel Beau stiffen next to you. In your periphery, you could spy a tightly clenched jaw and a few strained muscles in his neck.

“Mind if Y/N and I borrow your office, Sheriff Arlen?” Ted asked and emphasized his title. “Considering the nature of this case, I’d like to keep it as private as possible. Don’t want anything to reach Ms. Newton’s ears.”

Your hunch had been right. Several IP addresses pointed to Diane, some to public Wi-Fi’s. You and the team still needed to connect her to the other states and find out where she’d been staying there, but you could definitely trace some posts in recent weeks to her home in Montana. It was enough for an arrest warrant, but you still needed more evidence.

Additionally, it had all come together a little too easily. It seemed like a giant trap you were walking into. Diane wanted to be caught. But why?

“Why don’t I just join you? I’m sure Y/N here doesn’t mind,” Beau suggested with a tight smile and then snaked his arm around your middle, pulling you closer. “Ain’t that right, darlin’?”

Internally, you sighed a little at his obvious territorial pissing, but you were willing to throw him a bone. You stretched up and claimed his plump lips in a fervent kiss that Beau only all too happily reciprocated.

“Not at all, Sheriff. You know I always appreciate your input,” you replied with a dirty smirk at the double entendre.

As Beau looked down at you, he mouthed ‘God, I love you.’ You grinned in response.

“Happy to give it to you,” he said with another sweet peck of your lips. A triumphant and slightly cocky grin graced his lips as he looked back at Ted.

“Oh, so you two are back together?” Ted realized, his brow rising to his hairline. He’d never seen you two together but certainly had heard the whispers down in Mexico from your old task force. He’d been the DA for those cases as well. You’d never explicitly told him about you and Beau, though, even when he had tried to pry a little on those dates you went on.

“Well, I’m a hard one to quit,” Beau quipped almost proudly, like a peacock showing off his fan of feathers.

“As are cigarettes and many other vices,” Ted shot back with the same stupidly proud grin.

Translation: You’re an ass. And a failure. She deserves so much better. I’m ‘better.’ But maybe that didn't need a translation.

Beau should’ve known it was hard to out-argue a lawyer and ground his jaw. After all, he’d been married to one for many years.

You, on the other hand, shared a wide-eyed and baffled look with Jenny that bordered on amusement. You had almost gasped in shock. You hadn’t expected such a fiery reply, sure the men would stick to their Southern manners. But, oh well, everyone’s packing in fucking Texas…

“Why don’t you two go ahead? I’ll join you in a minute,” you ordered more than you earnestly proposed and shooed the two men down the hallway towards Beau’s office.

“Sure it’s such a good idea to lock those two in a room alone?” Jenny teased, her eyes lingering a little too long on Ted’s perfectly formed ass as he sauntered down the hall.

You couldn’t blame her. You had checked out Beau’s in the same breath.

“It’s only for a short time. They’re not gonna kill each other,” you laughed it off. Jenny arched a doubtful eyebrow at you. “That quickly,” you added a correction. “So, what did I miss here?” you asked and nodded towards the two men, closing the door to Beau’s office behind them. All you heard last was them talking about the recent Texans game.

Ugh, of course, they’d end up by football…

“Dick measuring contest,” Jenny supplied wryly.

“Ah, figured…”

“Well, better them than to lock Agent Y/L/N and the sheriff into the same room,” Poppernak joked with a soft chuckle as he appeared next to you and Jenny, chiming into the conversation.

You gaped at him in mock-shock. “Mo! I can’t believe you just said that,” you chided playfully.

His cheeks turned crimson red. “I’m sorry, Special Agent Y/L/N,” he apologized in a fluster.

“Mo, I told you to call me by my first name,” you reminded him with a smile. “Or I’m gonna have to start giving you silly names like Beau does.”

“Oh, I love Sheriff Arlen’s nicknames,” he quickly defended with a nervous laugh.

“Do you?” Jenny tilted her head with a questioning eyebrow.

He shrugged. “They’re clever.”

August 2020

“Old Fashioned,” you ordered with a look at the bartender, feeling Beau’s confused eyes and crinkled brow wander up to you. “Couldn’t have picked a nicer bar, huh? This place is a dump. You know that, right?”

Beau clicked his tongue and took a sip from his Ranch Water. “What are you doing here? Thought you never wanted to see me again.”

You let out a small sigh but didn’t meet his gaze. “Carla called me. Your family is worried about you.”

“I didn’t tell her where I was. How did you know I was here?”

“I didn’t. Carla said you haven’t been home in three days. Figured you’d gone on a bender. This is the fifth cop bar I checked out. Finally got lucky,” you said and thanked the bartender as he placed his drink in front of you. You settled down on a barstool next to Beau.

“Quite the effort. Sure I’m worth it?”

Your tongue swept over your lips. “Beau, look at me.” His forest-green eyes found yours upon your soft plea. “I’m sorry I put all that shit on you. It wasn’t fair. It’s not your fault, okay? His death isn’t on you. I know you loved him like a brother.”

“I did.” Beau took another sip of his drink. “But it is my fault. I was reckless and arrogant. We both know it.”

“It was a set-up, alright? I talked to my DEA contact. Cody said your intel was wrong. They knew you and Randy were closing in on them. They wanted to get rid of you,” you explained.

Beau smacked his lips. “I still shoulda known better. I should’ve seen it was a trap.”

“Maybe,” you admitted. You couldn’t say you would’ve done the same thing, but you knew Beau would’ve never purposely put Randy in danger if he had even the faintest idea. “But it could’ve happened to anybody. This was bigger than you knew.”

“It wouldn’t have happened to you,” he stated quietly. You couldn’t argue with that. You were more by-the-book than he was. You would’ve never gone against a superior’s order. You would’ve respected it.

“Look, just go home. Talk to your wife. Get some help,” you said. “You missed your suspension hearing, but I spoke on your behalf. Told them it wasn’t your fault. The DEA backed me. Harper’s gonna reinstate you. Just come back as soon as you’re ready.”

Beau nodded slowly. Even if he didn’t say it, you could tell he was thankful for your efforts. “I can’t go home.”

Your brow furrowed. “Why? I’m sure Carla will understand. You need to talk to someone about this. Go to therapy – and not the alcoholic kind. Losing a partner is not something you get over quickly. You need people in your corner, including your wife.”

“You mean the wife that lets criminals out on the street?” Beau’s gaze was focused on the glass in his hands. The wrinkles on your brow deepened. “The guy that shot him… Carla’s his defense attorney. Was, at least. He was supposed to do time, but two months ago, she got him paroled.” With a dark chuckle, he emptied his glass.

“Beau…” You knew he had always struggled with Carla’s job, making you sometimes wonder about their dinner conversations at home. “It ain’t her fault more than it is yours. She’s just doing her job. You know that. You’ve been together for so long, you’d think you’re used to it by now.”

Beau scoffed a chuckle and gestured to the bartender for a refill. “I was a young cop back then. Wasn’t on the job as long. I didn’t know it would bother me so much. Still lived in that hopeful bubble, I guess.”

You smiled knowingly. “You mean the ‘I didn’t think I’d see as much shit and injustice as I do now’ bubble?”

He snickered softly. “Yep, that one. Just didn’t think it’d be this hard, you know?”

“I get it. I mean, me and Carla butt heads all the time over this stuff. But we do it in a competitive fun way and then get drunk,” you said with a light chuckle. “Guess it’s different when you’re married, though, huh?”

“Yeah, it is…” he sighed.

“Still, go home. Talk to her,” you encouraged but could see your words of wisdom fell on deaf ears. “By the way, the funeral’s on Saturday.”

He turned his gaze away from his glass and found your eyes. “You need any help with that?”

“Maybe you can give a eulogy. You knew him best. I think he would’ve really liked that,” you said with a warm smile. No matter your own feelings, you knew deep down Randy would’ve wanted you to forgive his partner.

“Yeah, I can do that. Anything you need, okay?” Beau clasped your hand that laid on the bar counter and squeezed reassuringly before dropping it again.

You smiled appreciatively and teased, “Maybe show up sober. Or at least close-to.”

Beau chuckled a little. “I promise.”

You stood up from your seat then and put some cash for your drink on the counter. “Alright, I’m heading home. You need me to call you a cab?”

“Nah, I’m good. I’m just gonna finish this drink, then I’ll head out, too,” he said.

“You sure? Don’t make me come back here,” you threatened playfully.

Beau laughed softly. “I won’t. Thanks for everything, Y/N. I mean it.”

You sent him a smile and gave his shoulder a squeeze on your way out. “You’re welcome. Get home safe, okay?”

However, Beau couldn’t keep any of his promises. He made it home after three more drinks and woke up on the front lawn of his house. Carla wasn’t happy when she found him in the morning as she brought Emily to school. But Beau couldn’t stop. Every time he closed his eyes, the tragic events flashed before him like a horror movie, witnessing Randy’s death in a never-ending loop. He kept seeing his partner get dragged away, heard the shot over and over again like a rain of bullets without a ceasefire.

The guilt was eating him alive. The guilt of getting his partner into this mess in the first place. Of leaving him behind. Of surviving and coming out alive when he didn’t deserve to.

So, Beau kept drinking to forget, even though he knew it was a futile endeavor. The memory would never fade, but at least it was blurred.

Your heavy breaths echoed through the small trailer. His mouth moved down the column of your throat, leaving a wet path of ravenous love bites in its wake.

“Fuck, baby,” you moaned wantonly, his grip on your flesh punishing as he kept you pressed flush against him while he devoured you on the little dining table. Your ass sat on the wooden surface, your crossed ankles locked tightly behind his muscular back.

“God, you made me so happy today,” he growled against the shell of your ear, his rising length rubbing against your core through layers of denim.

“I can see that.” You giggled, your hands dangling in his hair. “There’s no need to hate him so much, you know?”

“Says you,” Beau quipped and unzipped your jeans, eagerly pulling them off you as his mouth sucked your clavicle purple and blue. “That slimy coyote always had it out for me.”

Beau removed your panties as well, tossing them behind his shoulder where they landed in the kitchen sink. “Whoops.” He grinned charmingly but was unstoppable, freeing his throbbing dick as he shoved his jeans and boxers barely over his ass. He didn’t bother to slip out of them all the way, too impatient to wait any longer to enter you.

“Still, I’m already yours. I’ve always been yours,” you said and braced yourself on his broad shoulders as one large hand on your back pulled you closer to the edge of the table. His other hand grabbed his cock, twisting his fist along the hard, long shaft a few times before he glided his cockhead through your slick folds.

“Not always.” With one harsh thrust, he pushed inside you, your tight walls fighting to make room for him and adjust to his stretch.

You gasped at the pleasurable burn that coursed through your body and ignited every sizzling nerve. He dropped his head to your shoulder, giving both of you some time to get used to each other. You could tell you were in for a wilder ride tonight. You always loved when he fucked you rough and hard. There was something raw and animalistic about the need in his hypnotizing green eyes.

Beau then claimed your lips with one fervent kiss, enough of a spark to cause a wildfire. He met your gaze, hands gingerly cupping your cheeks. “But I love that you’re mine now. And I’m sure as hell gonna make you mine tonight, darlin’.”

You crashed your lips against his, your kisses frenzied and untamed as his hips began to slam into you. His pounds into your pussy were relentless as you swallowed every inch of him. You gripped him tight, already feeling your first orgasm bloom. It accumulated like dark, violent storm clouds on the horizon, forecasting roaring thunder and heavy rainfall.

“Oh God! Fuck, baby!” You screamed as your climax tore through you like a hurricane, your cunt gushing on his cock and pulsing around him. Your nails dug into his shoulder blades and scratched down his back as you came undone.

Beau groaned into your ear, squeezing his eyes shut as he barely held on himself. But he didn’t let up and kept up his furious pace, not ready to stop yet. “Shit, keep doing that. You’re so fucking tight, Y/N,” he grunted against your skin, your sensitive flesh barely withstanding his ruthless pumps. “Want you to come again, darlin’.”

With his declaration, his hand slipped between your sweat-clad bodies. You came close to losing your mind as he thumbed furiously at your clit, the stars already starting to twinkle in front of your eyes. You could feel yourself get shoved to the edge once more, staring down the steep cliffs of white-hot ecstasy.

Your mind was consumed by need, his grip on your hips bruising as you exploded. You cried out raucously, your whole body quaking in his hold upon your eruption, the aftershocks so powerful they could cause cracks in your bones.

Beau spilled his seed deep inside of you, his body stuttering in rhythm with yours as your earthquake took him down with you. Hazy gazes met each other with lazy smiles as ragged breaths mingled.

“Fuck, that was good. I think that one might make it into our Top Ten.” Beau chuckled gravelly and placed a gentle kiss on your temple.

“Hmm, not sure. We have a few greatest hits.” You giggled and bit down on your lower lip with a mischievous twinkle in your eyes. “Can I tell you something?”

Beau cupped your cheeks, thumbs caressing the heated and rosy skin as he lifted your gaze. “Anything.”

“Just between us, you’re the best lover I ever had,” you confessed with a wide grin. The corners of his mouth rose to match yours.

“Well, between us, I’ve never loved anyone like I love you. You’re it, darlin’. You know that, right? You’re the love of my life,” Beau revealed, making you smile brighter than you ever had before.

“I’m not sure about the sex, but this moment, right here, is probably gonna make it into the Top Ten,” you said softly as a few tears stung your eyes.

“Good.” Beau smiled and pecked your forehead.

The buzzing of a phone shifted your attention. You recognized it as yours, and Beau was quick to retrieve it from your jeans pocket in the pile of clothes on the floor.

“It’s Jenny,” you told him before picking up. “Hello… What?! Uh-huh, we’ll be right there.”

Beau’s brow furrowed as he watched your features flicker through an array of emotions. “Bad news?”

“Uhm, honestly, I don’t know,” you said and swallowed some of your confusion down, gathering your thoughts. “Jenny said Diane just walked into the station and gave herself up. She is ready to confess but only wants to talk to us.”

“Us? As in us two?” Beau’s eyes narrowed. You nodded. “Well, that doesn’t sound fishy at all,” he commented wryly.

“Yup, I don’t like it.”

Chapter 8: Chemical Bonds – JUNE 26

A lot of revelations and foreboding in this one... 👀 Also, I just love having Beau say the word "coyotes" for some reason 😂

Join the TAG LIST here! 🌌 Wanna sponsor my caffeine addiction? ☕️

Everything Jensen: @alwaystiredandconfused @xlynnbbyx @lyarr24 @deans-spinster-witch @blackcherrywhiskey

@deansbbyx @foxyjwls007 @ladysparkles78 @roseblue373 @zepskies

@agalliasi @yvonneeeee @hobby27 @iamsapphine @globetrotter28

@mxltifxnd0m @lacilou @feyresqueen @suckitands33 @onlyangel-444

@syrma-sensei @perpetualabsurdity @deans-baby-momma @yoobusgoobus @jessjad

@hunter-or-the-hunted @k-slla @just-levyy @mrsjenniferwinchester @illicithallways

@muhahaha303 @ultimatecin73 @nancymcl @leigh70 @brightlilith

@nesnejwritings @autistic-gothic

Everything Beau Arlen: @snowayumi

Polaris Series: @corruptedcruiser @spnfamily-j2

[helpmeimblorboing]

Nico deserves so much more than what canon gives him MY GOD. Like I swear literally no one in canon is worthy of him. Except Jason. And not because he didn’t hurt Nico. Because he redeemed himself by not being an asshole about Nico’s forced outing

But guess what ? Jason’s fucking DEAD. Because Rick HATES Nico for some reason.

And Will, I guess. He seems okay. And he hasn’t betrayed, insulted or hurt Nico in some way, unlike the others

[antiwhores]

Everything hurts for Alpha!Bakugou when he goes into rut. And it hurts even more when your scent lingered around his room from when you guys hung out yesterday.

He’s gonna regret having his phone in his hand right now, he just knows it. Because he has your contact info opened and he’s contemplating ruining the friendship you two have carefully built.

You and him were not just friends but best-friends, since the second year of high school. And ever since then, he’s has a thing for you. His inner alpha goes crazy whenever you’re near, that or its contempt. You guys even happened to end up being neighbors.

And that was all gonna be ruined because he was ringing your phone right now. You answered after 3 rings.

“Whats up?”

He couldn’t help but to wrap his hand around his cock at the sound of your voice. He started a steady pace, trying to respond clear and hoping you couldn’t hear his cum soaked hand going back and forth for the… who knows how many times now.

“Where are you?”

Good. He managed to sound normal, but it came out quiet. It worried you.

“I’m at my place.”

“Come over.”

He said it before he could stop himself. This rut especially hurt and it was making him do things he might regret.

“Why? Are you okay? You sound… weird.”

He sounded weird? He thought he sounded normal. It didn’t matter, he was about to cum from listening to your voice.

“I’m fucking fine. Just… come over…”

“Well, can it wait? I have-“

“Tell me about your day.”

You had to notice he was acting weird now. This was so out of character for him. But he needed to hear your voice to finally get a fraction of his relief.

“Huh? Okay, well… I went-“

As you rambled he pulled on his dick to a picture of you he took one day at the beach of you in that bikini he liked (with your permission, he said it was for Mina).

He was getting close, having to bite his lip to conceal the groans and moans threatening to spill.

His tugging was getting faster and faster as you went on until finally he climbed he got to his high.

Before he could stop himself, he moaned loudly into the camera. He came in ropes all over himself. The other line was silent as he steadied his breath.

The clarity hit him like a bus as his high came down. And just as he began to panic and think up a worthy apology, you spoke.

“I’m coming over.”

[metalandmagi]

Romance Anime Starter List

I don’t know about you guys, but I’m sick and tired of seeing “Top ___ Best Anime of All Time” lists that are nothing but shounen. So, with "My Happy Marriage" getting a little attention from the anime community, I wanted to put together a list of some romance anime that I consider good “starters” for the genre. Because if I were just now becoming an anime fan, I’d think all there was to offer was shounen action series.

And by “starters” I mean basic stuff that’s not too…out there, and actually involves the characters getting together instead of just harems or using romance as a side plot (sorry Ouran High School Host Club and My Next Life as a Villainess). 

So if you’re new to anime and want stuff that’s not just guys beating the shit out of each other (which is also fun, don’t get me wrong), here are some basics.

Taisho Maiden Fairy Tale- When the pessimistic Tamahiko Shima loses all function in his right arm, his family sends him away to live in the mountains with the cheerful, hard working Yuzuki Tachibana…who was purchased by the Shima family to pay off her family’s debts and basically act as a caretaker/future bride for Tamahiko so they’d never have to deal with him again. It’s a more cheerful version of My Happy Marriage (without the supernatural stuff), except in this one, the guy is the one who has massive self-esteem issues and an abusive family. There are still very serious themes, but ultimately it’s not meant to make you cry every episode. I swear it’s so good, but nobody watched it!

Horimiya- A slice of life in which pretty and popular high school queen bee Hori, finds out her quiet, unassuming classmate Miyamura is hiding piercings and tattoos that could get him expelled. The two gradually find out more about each other and get together in the most realistic way I’ve seen depicted in an anime. It’s also fucking hysterical and genuinely emotional.

Recovery of an MMO Junkie- Another slice of life that focuses on two adults who meet in an MMO game without realizing they also know each other in real life. I don’t want to say much more than that. It’s adorable, and the main character is so relatable it hurts.

Love with Yamada-kun at Level 999- Speaking of MMOs, this is a newer series about Akane Kinoshita, a college first year who’s reeling from a bad break up. In an attempt to get back at her ex, she winds up meeting Akito Yamada, a popular gamer who happens to be in her guild in the MMO they both play at an IRL meetup. The two go from acquaintances to something more as they keep running into each other. Even more relatable main characters and just wholesome relationships all around.

Snow White With The Red Hair- A fantasy in which an apothecary named Shirayuki (meaning, you guessed it, “snow white”) runs away from her home in order to escape becoming the concubine of her town’s prince. While fleeing, she is rescued by Zen, the prince of a neighboring country, and she ends up becoming an herbalist to repay him. It's super cute with some genuinely swoon worthy moments and a couple that just works so well together. I have a habit of comparing this to Akatsuki no Yona, even though the two aren’t really that alike. This is more romance driven while Akatsuki no Yona is more of a serious historical fantasy with romance elements (Yona manga is amazing, but the anime barely scratches the surface, so that’s why I didn’t include it).

Sasaki to Miyano- When the shy, easily flustered Miyano meets Sasaki, a cool “delinquent” upperclassmen, the two end up bonding over manga…specifically BL manga. That’s right, Miyano is a fudanshi, but due to his small stature and somewhat feminine appearance, he’s constantly trying to convince others that he’s not interested in having his own love story where he’d be reduced to a stereotypical doe-eyed uke. But as Sasaki and Miyano spend more time together, they realize that what they have is more than friendship, and they have to come to terms with their own perception of gay relationships. This is my favorite romance of all time. It’s a slow burn, but boy is it worth it. Their relationship is so natural and realistic, just like Horimiya. Just two people hanging out and bonding over things the way people do in real life!

Given: The story of some boys in a band with trauma. Enough said. It's great. Go watch it.

Bloom Into You- Yuu Koito is a high school girl who’s been waiting her whole life for her own perfect romance to start…but when she receives a confession, she realizes she doesn’t know how to respond when she’s just not into the guy. And then she gets another confession…this time from the cool student council president Touko Nanami, who basically jumpstarts her lesbian awakening. Very cute story about how we perceive the concept of love vs actually feeling it. Also has a canonically aro/ace side character, so that’s a win for me. Another show like this is Adachi to Shimamura (but I honestly don’t remember much about it. It just didn’t stick with me as much).

Ore Monogatari- Takeo Gouda is a tall, bulky high school first year with a sensitive heart of gold. He wants nothing more than to find his own true love, but most girls are intimidated by his enormous stature, and they end up falling for his conventionally attractive friend instead. That is, until he meets the tiny, adorable Rinko Yamato. He falls in love instantly, but he’s sure she’s interested in his best friend like everyone else, so he vows to help get them together, even though his heart is breaking. Peak himbo behavior. Pure of heart, dumb of ass.

Yuri on Ice- Yes it’s the gay figure skating anime everyone knows. And yes it’s a fucking romance, okay? I will die on this hill. The romance between Viktor and Yuri is just as important as the plot!

Kaguya-sama Love Is War- Two insanely smart high school students both have a crush on the other, but since they’re…you know…high schoolers, neither of them wants to admit it first. So they come up with increasingly convoluted plans to get the other to confess first. This will go down as one of the best of all time. It’s a hilarious yet poignant modern classic.

Fruits Basket- I’ve talked about it before and I’ll talk about it again. A romance “comedy” that slowly morphs into a drama about a girl named Tohru who finds herself living with the mysterious Sohma family after her mother dies. Little does she know, the Sohmas are the victims of a  (somewhat silly, but ultimately tragic) curse that she must fight to break. Even though I’m more into it for the family drama, the romance is still top tier and plays an important role in the story. This is my second favorite anime of all time, and it’s a classic for a reason. If anyone hasn’t watched it yet, GO WATCH IT! IT WILL RIP YOU TO SHREDS!

And now for some honorable mentions that didn't quite fit into the regular list:

Ride Your Wave- A movie about a surfer who falls in love with a firefighter……and I’m not going to say any more than that. Go into it blind. If you like stuff like Your Name, this is a good one to watch.

Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun- A comedy about a high school girl who finds out the upperclassman she has a crush on is actually a shoujo manga artist, and no matter how she tries to confess to him, he just never gets it.

The Ice Guy and His Cool Female Colleague- A slow burn slice of life that focuses on a guy with ice powers who has a crush on his coworker. That’s it. That’s the show. When I say slow, I mean SLOW. It’s perfectly cute and fluffy, but my god does it take forever to get anywhere with these two.

Skip to Loafer- A high strung, small town girl decides to go to high school in Tokyo, where she meets a variety of classmates, including the laid back Sousuke Shima. The unlikely pair become friends, and soon enough, she starts to feel something more than friendship. The only reason I didn’t include it in the main list is because they don’t get together by the end of the first season, but it’s still really cute (also canonically trans character for the win!?)

So that’s my starter list. And no, I didn’t include Toradora, even though it’s a classic. I know it’s blasphemous, but I like it more as a comedy than a romance. It kinda lost me with the ending. But anyway, maybe someone will find something they like. Or maybe you'll just want to roast me and my picks 😅

[rosieswriting]

More than what you see

Remus Lupin x reader

Summary: You need to remind your boyfriend how much he is worthy off once again after a terrible full moon

Note: English is not my first language so it probably has some mistakes! It´s pure fluff with hurt/comfort from reader to Remus because i just love this prompt so much.

Words: 1.4K

He was barely holding himself together; shoulders slumped as he leaned against the cold wall of your bedroom. Still, as you reached for him, he shifted, pulling his torn sleeves down over the raw skin on his arms.

“Don’t. I’m fine,” he muttered, but the words lacked conviction, his voice barely a hoarse whisper. He tried to tug the tattered fabric tighter, as if hiding the wounds could somehow shield you from seeing just how much he was hurting.

You knelt beside him, hands hovering just inches away, waiting. He took a shuddering breath, eyes fixed somewhere over your shoulder, guilt flickering in them. “You… you shouldn’t have to keep doing this,” he mumbled, voice cracking as he finally let his head fall back against the wall. He was quiet for a moment, then added, “I don’t want you to see me like this. Not… every time.”

You bit your inner cheek at his words, your own heart aching for him. “But I want to be here for you. I want to help you,” you said slowly and softly, making sure not to elevate your tone. “Please, let me help you.”

He looked up at you; it still felt surreal to him to have someone in his life who wasn’t annoyed or bothered by his condition, even after years of friendship and months of dating. He just looked at you for a moment and nodded, allowing you to care for him.

You smiled softly and grabbed the hem of his shirt, slowly and carefully beginning to take it off him, the new scars along his chest revealed.

“It’s not like I prefer you with clothes anyway,” you muttered playfully, trying to lighten the mood as you let his shirt fall to the floor and reached for the med kit beside your bed.

He looked away, trying to hide a hint of a smile as you joked. It definitely helped reduce the tension. “Shut up,” he muttered back.

He tried to relax as you gently tended to his wounds, first disinfecting them and cleaning the dried blood from his chest and arms. “It’s not that bad, really,” he mumbled, wincing only slightly a few times when the cloth touched a particularly painful spot.

He was trying to downplay the whole thing, acting like he wasn’t struggling. He didn’t want to bother you or make you worry. Even so, the fact that you were here with him, taking care of him, made his heart fill with a different kind of comfort.

“Rem,” you called out softly. “I worry and heal freaking birds when they have a broken wing or something. You clearly went mad if you think I won’t help my boyfriend,” you teased him.

Remus raised an eyebrow, giving you a deadpan stare. “I’m offended that you’re comparing me to a bird,” he joked back, appreciating your playful banter. “You’re too good for me, you know that, don’t you?” he muttered, the smile that was beginning to form at the corners of his lips fading a little.

You finished healing his wounds and set the med kit on the table next to the bed before sitting in front of him, looking at him.

“I don’t know that. What I do know is that you don’t give yourself enough credit. I’m only good for you because you’re good for me. That’s how we work,” you spoke softly, brushing his hair out of his face.

He let out a soft sigh, closing his eyes. Of course, he had his moments of confidence and self-acceptance. Still, on days like this, his self-esteem hit an all-time low, and he couldn’t help but feel like you were doing too much for him.

“But I’m a werewolf,” he pointed out in a low voice. His mind kept telling him that someone as good as you should run as far away as possible from a creature like him, not stay and care for him.

“You are Remus Lupin,” you said quickly and softly. “You are my friend and my boyfriend. Being a werewolf is part of you, but it doesn’t define you. You are you, and you happen to be the most amazing person I’ve ever met.”

He swallowed hard at your words, feeling a mixture of emotions welling up inside him. It wasn’t as if no one had ever said something kind to him; thanks to Merlin, he had wonderful friends. But those words coming from you always hit him hard. He still hesitated to believe them, though. “I don’t deserve you.”

“Rem,” you mumbled softly, your own heart breaking at how he couldn’t see himself as you did. You cupped his face softly and made him look at you. “You know me; if I even thought for a second that you were a monster, I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t be dating you, and I wouldn’t be telling you how amazing you are. But I am here because you, Remus Lupin, are nowhere near a monster. Not even close.”

He closed his eyes, relishing the feeling of your soft hands as you cupped his face. Your words were like a warm caress that soothed his aching heart, but he still struggled internally to let your message sink in. “I just don’t want to hurt you,” he muttered, opening his eyes and looking into yours. “You deserve someone who’s normal, someone who isn’t a walking time bomb.”

“I know what I’m worthy of,” you cut him off softly, not wanting him to keep talking down about himself. “I’m worthy of someone who loves and appreciates me. Someone who’s with me at all times, who cries with me when something bad happens, and who laughs with me when something good happens. I’m worthy of love and devotion. Of someone who’ll come to me the moment I call them, even if they’re doing something important. Of someone who makes me feel safe,” you spoke sweetly, caressing his cheek. “And that someone is you.”

Remus was quiet for a few moments, his eyes locked on yours as he took in your words. Each sentence was like a knife, tearing down the walls he’d built around himself. He swallowed hard against a sudden lump in his throat. “You do deserve that,” he managed to say at last.

“And you give me all of that and more,” you let out a short laugh. “Merlin, I used to think I was such a loser, Remus. Really, I always thought nobody would ever have the patience to even try to date me. But then you appeared, and you were you. You were the only one—and still are—who lets me ramble for hours about silly things. You’re the one who makes me feel loved. No monster could ever do that.”

His heart clenched at your words. The thought of you thinking of yourself as a loser tore at his soul. How could you, the kindest, sweetest, and most generous person, ever think something like that? He reached out and took your hands in his, holding them tight. “You are not a loser,” he murmured softly. “You are vibrant, caring, and everything good in the world.”

You smiled at his words and squeezed his hands. “So are you, and it pains me that you don’t realize. I love you, everything about you.”

Remus’s breath hitched at your words. The feeling of your hands clutching his and your smile washing over him left him lost for words, unable to find the right response to express just how deeply your love affected him.

“I love you too,” he choked, his voice thick with emotion. He pulled you closer, resting his forehead against yours. “More than anything in the world.”

“I will tell you every day that you are not a monster until it gets into your thick head, do you understand me, Lupin?” you mumbled softly, teasingly.

He let out a soft chuckle, a mix of amusement and affection. “Trust me, you’re loud enough that it’s impossible to ignore what you say,” he said, a hint of a smile tugging at his lips, making you roll your eyes in playful banter.

“But in all seriousness,” he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer, the tension and lingering self-doubt slowly melting away. “I’ll try to stop beating myself up all the time.”

You smiled widely at his words. “Can I kiss you now?” you asked playfully, making him chuckle.

“Of course, dove.”

He leaned in, closing the distance between you, his lips meeting yours in a slow, soft kiss filled with reassurance and love.

The next day, when you went off in the afternoon to spend time with your friends, he went to a jewelry shop and bought an engagement ring.

[livwritessometimes]

So Long London - Lando Norris

: Lando Norris x singer!reader

: y/n is ready to move on

: Part 3 | Part 1 (Spin-off Series)

: Series Masterlist

: Spin-off Series

: Main Masterlist

: Author’s Note: And with that we come to the end of Love lost series. I hope you guys liked it (if so do let me know) 💕 also I had no idea there was a 30 photo limit!! Had to delete 2 photos for the story to make sense.

…

Yourname added to their story!

seen by User48 and 76,021 others

| User48 replied to your story

-> why are you here?? Didn’t you and Lando break up! Why are you still hanging out with his friends??

| User02 replied to your story

-> Yessss I’m so glad you’re here to support max 💕

liked by maxverstappen1 and 65,528 others

👤: maxverstappen1, schecoperez, kellypiquet, redbullracing

Yourname: Congratulations Max and Checo!! P1-P2 💪🏻 (also last slide is max emilian’s live reaction to the tea ☕️)

view all 52,301 comments

schecoperez: Thank you y/n 🙌🏻

*liked by yourname*

maxverstappen1: you swore you won’t use the 3 pic 😃

-> Yourname: Yes and I lied 😙

redbullracing: Thank you for coming y/n 💙 you’re always welcome here!

-> Yourname: Thank you for having me 🫶🏻

*liked by redbullracing*

kellypiquet: The 2 pic is so cute!! Send that to me <3 also I’ve been telling you that max is a girls girl 🎀

-> Yourname: Sending!! And yesss I believe you now

-> maxverstappen1: :/

*liked by kellypiquet, Yourname*

User62: I wonder what Lando has to say about their friendship

-> User48: I know right like you’re no longer a wag stop trying to be one

-> User50: umm first of all Max and Kelly both are friends with y/n (and dare I say they’re closer to her than him) and second of all she can do whatever she wants!!

*liked by kellypiquet*

Yourname added to their story!

🎶 The Night We Met by Lord Huron 🎶

seen by alexandrasaintmleux and 76,021 others

| alexandrasaintmleux replied to your story

-> let’s meet tom? Have a girls dinner!!

Yourname: are you sure? I don’t want you to take on unnecessary stress just because of me

-> ofc I’m sure!! And don’t say that, it’s been so long since we’ve seen each other

liked by charles_leclerc and 83,294 others

👤: alexandrasaintmleux, kellypiquet, lilymhe, francisca.cgomes, iamrebeccad

Yourname: Previously on Gossip Girls!! (missing @/lilyzneimer and @/carmenmmundt)

view all 68,361 comments

Yourname: also @/charles_leclerc I stole your girlfriend!! She’s mine now <3

-> charles_leclerc: Whatttt!!! 😨

-> alexandrasaintmleux: yes @/charles_leclerc it’s true

-> charles_leclerc: Alexx!! we have a child together 🐶 think about him

-> Yourname: oh yes! Forget to tell you, we get Leo’s custody 🐕 I got your girl and your dog leclerc 😌

-> alexandrasaintmleux: sorry baby but it is what it is 🤷🏻‍♀️

User13: why is no one talking about the last slide 🫢

User32: I bet the reason why lily is not here is because she’s staying loyal to Lando and McLaren!!

-> User02: ????? Lily is Oscar’s girlfriend why would she stay loyal to Lando!!

liked by User04 and 32,942 others

👤: landonorris, magui_corceiro, Yourname

F1updates: Lando Norris spotted with a new beau! The McLaren driver was recently seen attending the Monte Carlo Masters Finals with Portuguese model Margarida Corceiro. Fans spotted the two getting dinner after the event. Norris recently ended a 5 year relationship with Singer Y/n L/n. There has been no confirmation from either the two about whether they are dating or not. Only time will tell if it’s time to welcome a new wag in the McLaren garage.

view all 26,305 comments

User04: I’m so happy for Lando to finally be with someone worthy!!

User79: she’s so pretty 😍

User05: can’t believe he wasted 5 years of his life with y/n

User86: why would you tag y/n in this?? It’s not even related to her

-> User51: why else, she deserves to know how happy Lando is after he left her

User01: that’s so soon!! Didn’t he just got out of a FIVE year long relationship?

-> User74: it’s been 2 months relax he can do whatever he wants

Yourname added to their story!

seen by User33 and 59,621 others

| User33 replied to your story

-> hmmm weird timing to post this 👀

landonorris added to their story!

seen by Yourname and 96,204 others

| Yourname replied to your story

-> so five years meant nothing to you

landonorris: why do you care? It’s not like you did that during our entire relationship

-> what do you even mean by I didn’t care!! I was with you through everything! All your wins and all your losses. How can you say that after I’ve given you so much

landonorris: I loved you but you never bothered seeing any of my efforts. There’s no point of arguing, after all this time you’re still the same old selfish clueless person who let us go. You were never there when I needed you, and now that I am happy you can’t seem to digest that. Move on and let me move on as well.

*seen by Yourname*

liked by User02 and 83,574 others

Yourname: You’ve been on my mind, and I’ll waste my time 🚬

view all 65,026 comments

User02: prettyyy 💋

User96: girlll are you okay you’re quoting cigarettes after sex 😀 I don’t think you are okay

-> User21: are we all gonna ignore the fact that the next line is “‘til you lift me off the floor and love me again”

*Incoming Call from Y/N*

Kelly: “Hey how’s your night going? I just saw your post-“

Yourname: “kell” y/n said as she tried to control her breathing. “I texted him after I saw his story. He’s blaming me for our break up. I- i did so much for him and now he-“

Kelly: “ok sweetheart listen to me, first try to take a deep breath. Now tell me exactly where you are Max and I will come and get you”

Yourname: “I’m near our regular bar”

Kelly: “okay we’re on our way. Just stay where you are and we’ll get you. And know this y/n it’s not your fault. You guys breaking up was not your fault! don’t let his nonsense get to you. We’re almost there, see you in 5”

liked by User99 and 62,838 others

👤: Yourname, maxverstappen1, kellypiquet

Celebritygossip: Singer Y/n L/n was spotted crying outside a bar by some of her fans. The fans claim that the singer was hysterically crying over the phone. Bystanders also said that they saw Formula 1 driver Max Verstappen and his girlfriend Kelly Piquet arrive at the location trying to console L/n. This news comes right after L/n was seen partying according to her last Instagram post. There has been a lot of speculation going on behind this breakdown, but many believe this is the aftermath of L/n’s ex, Lando Norris confirming his new relationship.

What do you think about this situation? Let us know in the comments down below.

view all 53,829 comments

Yourname added to their story!

seen by User02 and 63,027 others

| User02 replied to your story

-> 💙💙

liked by kellypiquet and 75,728 others

Yourname: Gone was any trace of you, I think I am finally clean 🤍

view all 61,839 comments

kellypiquet: 💕

liked by User99 and 62,838 others

👤: Yourname

Y/nNews: It is being reported that singer Y/n L/n has sold her house in London. The singer bought this house in 2019 and lived there with her now ex-boyfriend Lando Norris. The couple broke up a few months ago. Since then, the house has been occupied by L/n alone. There has been no news about whether she bought a new house yet. Stay tuned for more updates!

view all 61,839 comments

liked by kellypiquet and 82,738 others

👤: kellypiquet

Yourname: A much needed day out! (Also Kelly was concerningly good at the gun range)

view all 74,838 comments

kellypiquet: what can I say I’m a women of many talents 💪🏻

-> Yourname: that you are (@/maxverstappen1 hide all sharp objects in the house)

-> maxverstappen1: So glad you guys had a good time 🥰 (way ahead of you)

-> kellypiquet: 🙂🙂 (y’all better run)

-> Yourname: 🏃🏻‍♀️

-> maxverstappen1: 🏃🏻‍♂️

-> User61: these two are such clowns 😭

*liked by kellypiquet*

liked by User31 and 88,025 others

Y/nUpdates: Y/n L/n at the Variety Interview “I guess I’ve been exposed to the world in a sense, people prey on that and take advantage of that. They twist it in a way that you don’t always expect.” L/n got emotional as she continued “Sorry I didn’t mean to do this, but it is such a hard thing to balance, because how do you be honest without jeopardising anything. It is very easy to feel out of control and I feel so grateful to be with family and friends who have been with me through my toughest time.”

view all 79,628 comments

User31: It’s so heartbreaking to see her get emotional while talking about the negative effect that fame has on a person.

User08: I’m so glad to see that she’s doing better! It’s nice to finally see her happy and smile genuinely 💕

User22: Not her mentioning Max, Kelly and P as the family she has made along the way 🥺🥺

liked by Yourname and 111,838 others

👤: maxverstappen1, Yourname

kellypiquet: Home sweet home 🏠

view all 92,837 comments

User02: Alt caption: Max and Kelly with their overgrown child 👧🏻

*liked by maxverstappen1, kellypiquet*

Yourname: 💕🧿

-> Yourname: also tell max he better hide 😃 because when I find him, I will hit him with the same shoe 👟 he kicked me with

-> maxverstappen1: You’ll never catch me 😌

-> Yourname: P told me where you are 😈👟

-> maxverstappen1: 🏃🏻‍♂️💨

-> User66: at this point I feel P is only smart person in this household besides Kelly

*liked by kellypiquet*

User01: I live for all the y/n x P content! It’s so wholesome 🫶🏻

*liked by Yourname*

Yourname added to their story!

(You know what time it is 🎶)

seen by User02 and 69,737 others

liked by kellypiquet and 99,261 others

Yourname: Sometimes when you have something for so long, life without it feels meaningless. All these years you’ve spent building up something so special, only for you to watch it crumble right in front of your eyes. It takes a lot of strength to move on and finally let things go. But that is part of life, slowly you learn how to breathe again. It took me a long time to be okay and today I release a part of myself to the world that I no longer am. I hope that you can find it within yourself to let go and move on. Here is So Long London.

view all 91,739 comments

liked by User13 and 54,986 others

Y/nfanclub: Honestly speaking if I were y/n I’d be mad as hell too! I mean just look at London 💔

view all 46,728 comments

User13: But it’s a different kind of pain when someone ruins a place for you. @/Yourname I hope that you get to love London again ❤️‍🩹

Yourname added to their story!

seen by User44 and 69,737 others

[thatsdemko]

without you there’s nothing to live for - l.norris

masterlist

pairings: lando norris x fem!reader

warnings: jealousy + insecurities + fluff + build up(kinda long I’m sorry about that) + some errors here or there

a/n: while I had bits and pieces of this work in millions of other lando drafts I think I have to give credit where it’s due to @userlando and her anons ☺️🫶 I’m in such a shit mood so i figured posting this might make me feel better. enjoy xx

Lando Norris was annoying. a childhood friend of yours that somehow stuck throughout the years and never seemed to vanish. he was like a a piece of gum stuck to your shoe, he just never left.

and while you’re thankful he’s the longest lasting friendship you have; did you fail to mention he could be annoying?

his hands drum against the kitchen island, a distraction worthy of you flicking your pencil in his direction, but he’s too quick the pencil would just end up behind him, so you result in throwing him a very pointed look that shuts him up.

“is that pencil up your ass too today?”

you give him another look before staring down at the empty grocery list you failed to create, because lando has claimed your flat as his flat. the lavish lifestyle penthouse was abandoned at the instant call of your arrival to Monaco, and now all of his expensive taste clutters your space.

“did you put eggs on the list? I need eggs. it’s good protein—“ he shuts up to the sound of you breaking the pencil in half, another annoyed look tossed his way.

lando could be a lot. but there was no one who could keep up with you. there was no one like him in your corner, and while he pushed your buttons you were eternally grateful for his loyalty despite your rather jaded friendship.

“let’s just go to the store? I’ll drive.” he says like there’s another alternative to the store. ever since he got his license and moved in, you’ve never even put your foot on the accelerator. you’ve almost forgot the thrilling feeling of driving.

“eggs have been added to the list.” you finally say, typing up your notes of a grocery list once you were finally able to think straight without lando tapping away or chatting your ear off.

god was he annoying, but you loved him for him.

—

his wallet funds are bigger than what you have. you feel guilty every time he buys, but it’s not like you have the funds to do so. he knows that guilty look across your face when he ends up paying for 10% groceries and 90% female hygiene products. he doesn’t mind, just shoves his card in the machine and says a thank you for the person who bags your things.

“you have to let me pay you back—“

“no, nonsense.” he cuts you off, the conversation goes like it always does. you beg, and beg, to try and wiggle in a payback, but he refuses. all those years of your parents giving him shelter, taking him to races, or letting him play in your backyard it’s the least he could do.

“but the price adds up, and you’re paying for most of the rent—“

“I won’t have this conversation with you. just get in the car.” he says it without letting you have another word in. it’s his turn to shoot you down with pointed looks every time you try to mention money.

“y/n?! is that you?”

lando’s heart nearly drops to his stomach at the sound of that voice—that voice, being your ex boyfriend. he came out of nowhere, like the stalker he is, and finds himself walking around lando’s spiffy mclaren with wide eyes and confusion at your presence with the formula one driver. he must’ve forgotten lando was your best friend.

“you going to introduce me to your new boyfriend?”

before you can protest lando shakes his hand. you can tell by the grip lando has on him it’s a firm hard handshake. one to prove a point about the 2 a.m calls of you crying to your best friend from across the world. he was a shitty man, and maybe showing lando off like that would put him in his place.

“this is lando, you guys met awhile back.” you say.

you watch the two of their eyes glimmer in the sunlight with hatred for one another. lando was the guy you told him not to worry about— and he still was— and he was the guy lando was desperately wanting to kick ass.

“don’t remember that.”

“I actually remember, didn’t you spend half the night snogging another girl?” lando’s gentle reminder makes your ex’s face flush pale. you watch a little smile lift to lando’s lips before you both excuse yourselves to head home.

“my new boyfriend is so cool.” you say in a sarcastic tone once it’s just the two of you in his car.

lando let’s out laugh, and just puts the car in reverse. the simple act makes your head spin. his hand reaching behind the head of your seat, the way his eyes quickly glance on you before he looks back to ensure no one is coming. these thoughts were never present until this run in. would lando be a good boyfriend?

you can’t help but explore those thoughts in the twenty minute car ride home in pure silence.

your mind wanders to the idea of waking up to him in your bed. his legs tangled with yours, lazy soft kisses pressed your cheeks. you could melt at just the thought of it.

or maybe he’d make you eggs. you’d wake to the smell of bacon grease and him shirtless—like he always is in the kitchen— creating a masterpiece meal that you devour in minutes.

what switch has suddenly changed in you? because now when you look at lando, your heart does things it never did before. your head spins of ideas of him as your boyfriend and it’s so sickening you could throw up.

“I’m going to unload the groceries, you’re more than welcome to sit and stare into space for as much as you need.” his words spook you. a little yelp escaped your lips that he’d caught you. your eyes bug wide—like they always are when you get into your daydreams— and mind so full you lose track of time and often forget your surroundings. you had no clue you’d been sitting in the driveway this whole time.

“where do you want the tampons again? I seem to forget.”

“under the bathroom sink please.”

you wonder if you can shove your thoughts under there too. a nap is needed to clear your mind of whatever seems to be boggling it all about lando.

—

a nap certainly did help, however, waking up to lando shirtless in your bed also napping? yeah, all that hard work of suppressed thoughts came right back.

you think about taking your finger and running it all over the divots, curves, and muscles of his body. you think about how much stronger he’s been looking lately and how the little hair on his chin is growing onto you. what is going on with you?

it was common for lando to come in your room and sleep with you. nightmares were rare for you, but they happened more often than you expected and lando always wanted to be there for it. but this was just a nap? why did he have to come in and sleep with you? he could’ve just slept in his own bed, that certainly would’ve helped your heart if he did.

you roll out of bed and tip toe around your bed, until your heart makes you stop. you stare at his peaceful state. the way his curls fall over his forehead, the thick long lashes you desperately want, the soft smile on his lips— his eyes are opening, shit, you think to yourself.

you quickly book it out of the room to save yourself from the embarrassment of him catching you watching him sleep. what a creep you were becoming in the matter of hours. this is why you shouldn’t like your best friend. hell, this is why you shouldn’t let your man best friend live with you. it was destined for one of you to fall in love.

but it was also destined for you to most likely get your heart broken.

lando doesn’t date women like you. you’ve seen his roster of women rotating in and out of your place, none of them looked like you: an average woman with average looks. who’d want that?

a little part of hope lingers in your chest when you see him enter the kitchen. his lips press against your temple as he mumbles a good morning.

“how was your nap?”

“not long enough.” you admit watching him type away on his phone. his elbows are pressed against the granite counter tops, his fingers work vigorously against the screen. a little smile appears on his lips that make you nauseous. it could just be max, but it could be another girl.

almost two hours ago this wouldn’t of mattered to you. you wouldn’t of cared if lando invited a girl over and you stayed locked up in your room, but now all of a sudden it’s bothersome.

“what’s got you all smiley?” you ask, partially out of curiosity but partially to just kill your heart with his response. he sets his phone face down on the counter resting his chin in the palm of his hand, “max is coming over, and so is pietra.”

“exciting.” you grin, though the words disagree with your expression making his face drop with worry.

“are you worried max is going to take your best friend spot? he could never, y/n.”

best friend. yeah, that’s all you’ll ever be when girls like ria and pietra exist. deadly beauty that could put a man in his place. when was yours ever going to show up?

—

you’re tipsy off the expensive bottle of wine max brought. your body is pressed against lando’s for support as you all laugh about something max said. you can’t help but wrap your arms around his strong bicep, resting your head against his shoulder listening to pietra expose Max’s recent mess up.

lando doesn’t take notice in the way you’re seated. he knows you’re beside him based off the heat that radiates off your body. you always got overly warm when drunk, and sometimes a bit too affectionate, but he didn’t mind. he actually loved it when you wanted to be beside him.

“so when did this happen?” pietra points her finger between you two, a bright smile pressed against her lips as she cozies herself up to her own boyfriend.

lando clears his throat. he practically yanks his arm out of your grip leaving you to fall back against the cushions beside him. you hide your face into his back out of embarrassment suddenly becoming aware of how you two look. “oh umm—“

“oh gosh! I’m so sorry. I think it’s the wine talking in me.” she quickly apologizes, a blush filters her face similar to yours.

“it’s not the first time today that’s happened.”

“do tell,” max sits on the edge of his seat listening to lando explain the run in, your face is still pressed into his back. you’re hoping that maybe if you just stay there you would disappear into thin air or end up in your bedroom sound asleep away from all of this.

“I still want to kick that guys ass—“

“wait,” pietra cuts off max, her voice demands all the attention in the room. you pry your head from out of lando and peer behind him at her, “you didn’t even tell him you are just friends? you let him assume that you’re dating?”

lando’s mouth opens and closes. nothing seems to come out making max throw his head back in a laughing fit, “oh god! I owe ria money for this, you like y/n!”

Lando’s face is flushed red, a similar color to the glass of wine in his hands. there was nothing he could say. he couldn’t even protest it when it was true. he hadn’t even realized he never corrected your ex boyfriend, because truth be told, he wanted to be shown off as your boyfriend.

“come on pietra, let’s leave these two alone.”

they leave as quick as they came, leaving only the half full bottle of wine for yourselves. you both sit in silence, no one musters up the courage to speak.

you both get ready for bed like nothing happened. the awkward silence eats you up. you want to speak up and tell him you feel the same, you want things to go back to normal. you just want annoying lando back.

when you finally finish your nighttime regiment, you’re ready for bed. you turn the corner into your bedroom and see the silhouette of lando reflecting against the wall. your night light was on, and he was laying in your bed, cozied up under the covers.

“sleeping in here tonight?” you ask slipping under the covers beside him, he moves himself closer to you occupying the middle of the bed.

“you don’t mind, do you?”

you shake your head curling your body against his, “I like it when you sleep with me.” you say making a sense of pride soar through his chest. he likes the way your body molds against his.

“your new boyfriend will protect you.” he smiles down at you, carefully place a kiss to your forehead before reaching over and turning off your lamp.

“thank goodness he’s here, I can’t sleep without him.”

“you know I’m talking about myself right?” he lifts his neck up, face looking down at you, your eyes closed practically half asleep already.

“goodnight, boyfriend.”

“goodnight, girlfriend.”

tags: @oconso @xcicix @imsorare @weasleyswizardwheezes-blog @monzabee @lpab @frreyaa @motorsp0rt @lovelytsunoda @smoothopz

want to be apart of my tag list? let me know here!

[acoazlove]

Spiralling Inside

Azriel x Reader

Summary: Spiralling into your head is damaging, and there’s only one person who can help you.

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings: a little bit of angst, fluff

─────────────────────────

Loneliness isn’t a feeling the soul is supposed to feel, to experience.

It’s isolating, whether it's self-inflicted or out of one's control, it can break you. It feels like no one can save you from that feeling. How do you know that someone will help you out of the feeling, and stop you from spiralling all over again?

You don’t know. That’s the scary part, you’re supposed to have faith. Trust wholeheartedly in someone that they won't make you feel like that ever again.

The kind of trust you’re supposed to have with yourself. So what happens when you can’t even trust your own brain from thinking of all the worst scenarios? Make you think that everyone hates you. That you’re not worthy of loving friendships. You are not good enough. They are only around you because they pity you.

They hate me. A common thought for an overthinker, a hurt person. No one wants those words swirling around their head.

Even while talking one-on-one with someone, a friend, it feels as if your mind is making you feel like they are only interacting with you because they feel bad for you. Like they know how lonely you are.

A larger event is even worse because you are alone. Everyone has someone to talk to, to be with. Someone to call their own. You don’t.

The same people who call you family are the ones who seem to forget you’re standing beside them, because ‘you are so quiet.’ Why say something if it doesn't add to the current topic? So you keep quiet, keep to yourself.

Not one person notices when you spiral when you get so deep in your mind that you can’t claw your way out. Can’t silence those voices. Except for one person.

Azriel. Your person. Your other half. Your mate. And while standing in the middle of the Night Court’s ballroom, with your family, talking to each other, he notices.

You suppose that’s one of the upsides to him being the spymaster. He notices you. He sees you.

“Angel?” His soft voice reaches your ears before he appears in front of you. Blocking your view of the rest of the world. So it's just him.

A scarred but gentle hand reaches for yours, subtly pulling out of the crowded room. You only notice you have moved when a cooling breeze brushing your face. Azriel’s hands are on you next, cupping your face so gently that an on-looker might think he is holding the most precious jewels.

“My love?” You finally meet his gaze, his swirling jade and amber eyes. Holding his emotions out on a silver platter for you. Only for you.

He watches your brows pinching, silver lining your eyes, features twisting in guilt and sadness. “I’m sorry.” The defeat in your voice physically pains him. His features softening, thumbs swiping the tears that fall unwanted.

“No. You have nothing to be sorry for.” The conviction in his dulcet voice helps to slowly pull you from your self-deprecating shell. An arm wraps around your waist, pulling you into a tight embrace, his other hand moves to the back of your head, cradling you to the crook of his neck, smothering you in his scent. Your arms wrap around him quickly, so tight as if you’re worried he’d disappear. And based on where your thoughts are right now, your mind thinks he very well might.

The scent that helps ground you. A fact you had told him early on in your relationship, even before you mated. A fact he kept in the very forefront of his mind for moments exactly like these.

Deep breaths tickle his throat. Breathe in as much of him as you can. If only you could fuse with him. You wouldn’t ever have to be away from him.

A calloused hand runs through your hair soothingly. His other hand rubbed up and down your back, in the way he found helped calm you the most. Pressing featherlight kisses to your forehead and temple. Whispering sweet nothings into your skin.

“What happened, angel?” Feeling the rumble of his words as he speaks, vibrating into your own form. You shrug in response. “Just got in my head.” Words muffled against his neck.

You pull away from his neck, a huff leaving you at how much of your hair is in your face from the movement. A watery laugh leaves you as Azriel tries to push it out of your face. A loving smile tugs at his lips at the endearing sound.

Once it's out of the way, you look up at your mate through wet lashes. Your cheeks flushed and tear-stained. “There she is.” His voice is so adoring it makes your heart skip a beat. His hazel gaze searches your face, looking for what, you don’t know.

“I’m fine, Az. I just-“A heavy sigh leaves you as you try to verbalise your thoughts. “I just started thinking too much when they turned away from me, which I know sounds self-conceited and narcissistic but-“ your rambling gets cut off by Azriel’s mouth meeting yours. Releasing a contented sigh as you sink into the kiss. So full of love and feelings that can’t be put into words.

He pulls away just enough to rest his forehead against yours, his hands cupping your face once again. “I know you, my love. You are the most selfless, intelligent, and kindhearted person I have ever met. And yes your brain works against you sometimes, but that does not make you self-conceited or narcissistic. You cannot beat yourself up over something you can’t control.” He presses a featherlight kiss to the tip of your nose. “They all love you. Don’t let your mind tell you otherwise. They are around you because they want to be.”

You feel your bottom lip tremble under the weight of his words. “I love you. More than anything, more than what should be possible. You’re my mate.” A kiss to your forehead “My other half.” Another kiss to the corner of your mouth. “I love you, my angel.” A lingering kiss to your lips.

Your hands slide up his arms to rest on top of his wrists. Only pulling away when air is needed. Turning your head to brush a kiss to the palm of his hand. Pulling his hand from your face to thread your own with them.

”I love you with my whole being Azriel. More than you’ll ever know.” Voice raspy from your tears, but so sincere a smile pulls at his lips. Pressing one more kiss to the crown of your head before taking a single step back to get a proper look at you.

”Do you want to go back in there, or go home?” Tone still gentle. A small shake of your head. “We should go back in.” He nods, moving to step back towards the ballroom. But a tug of his hand stops him, immediately looking for something wrong in your expression, but a smirk tugs at your lips. “How does my makeup look?”

A snort leaves him, and he brushes a thumb under your eye before leaning back dramatically to get a better view, a giggle leaving you at the movement, a boyish grin taking over his face at the sound. “Looks perfect. Just like you, my love.” Wrapping an arm around your waist, leading you towards where you left the rest of your family.

As they come back in view, smiles light up their faces, but your focus is pulled back up to the male at your side. He smiles down at you as Mor and Feyre start gossiping about something they had heard from one of the courtiers.

Leaning into your mate's warmth as you listen to their rambling. You know you’ll be just fine as long as you have Azriel by your side.

─────────────────────────

a/n: I know this isn't part five for a new place, but I've personally been over thinking quite a lot recently, and once i started writing this it just kept flowing. so this is dedicated to all my overthinkers. hoped you enjoyed <3

[aventurineswife]

My deepest apologies if a) your requests aren't open and b) you don't write for Alhaitham (replace him with Kaveh if this is the case).

Imagine the crew-meru hanging out and this beautiful woman approaches them and starts acting affectionate towards Alhaitham. They ask who she is and she reveals that she's his lover and has brought him gifts; both homemade and from her travels.

Everyone is shocked to learn that Alhaitham is in a relationship and with such a sweet beauty to boot!

“You had a girlfriend?!”

Summary: In a lively tavern in Sumeru, the crew enjoys a game of cards filled with laughter and playful banter, during all of this Alhaitham's unexpected girlfriend arrives, surprising everyone.

Tags: Alhaitham x Female!Reader, Homemade Gifts, Humor, Slice of Life, Surprises, Lighthearted, Emotional Connection(?), Friendship, Tavern Gathering.

Warnings: Cyno's horrible dad jokes… and I totally didn't forget the name of the card game that the crew from Sumeru played, written in the third person (I tried-), Possibly ooc.

A/N: MY REQUESTS ARE OPEN!! DON'T WORRY, ANON! I can (try) write for any character from the fandom listed in my masterlist!

The sun was setting over Sumeru, casting a warm glow over the lively gathering of friends. The crew had settled at a cozy tavern, laughter and chatter filling the air as they played a game of cards. Cyno, with his typical serious demeanor, was trying his best to lighten the mood with his infamous dad jokes, which elicited mixed reactions.

“Why did the electro user break up with the dendro user?” Cyno began, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Because they couldn’t find common ground.”

Tighnari rolled his eyes, unable to hide the smirk creeping onto his lips. “Cyno, if you’re trying to be funny, it’s not working. Save us the pain, please.”

Just as Cyno was about to respond with another groan-worthy pun, the tavern door swung open, drawing everyone’s attention. A beautiful woman stepped inside, her presence radiating warmth. She had an air of grace about her, and her smile lit up the room. The crew paused their game, curiosity piqued.

“Alhaitham!” she called, her voice melodic as she made her way toward their table. The way she approached him with an eager bounce caught everyone off guard, and Alhaitham, who was typically calm and composed, looked up in surprise.

“Ah, there you are.” he replied, a hint of warmth creeping into his otherwise reserved tone. The sight of her seemed to melt away his usual stoicism.

The crew exchanged glances, confusion painting their faces. Cyno leaned forward, a teasing glimmer in his eyes. “So, who’s this? Your assistant, Alhaitham?”

“No, I’m not his assistant,” she laughed lightly, brushing back a strand of hair. “I’m his girlfriend.”

A stunned silence enveloped the table as the revelation settled in. Kaveh dropped his cards, his eyes wide. “Wait, what? Alhaitham has a girlfriend?!”

The woman smiled brightly, producing a small bag from her side. “I brought gifts for him! Some homemade treats and a few souvenirs from my travels.”

“Homemade treats?” Kaveh’s eyes sparkled with interest as he leaned closer, momentarily forgetting about his surprise. “What did you make?”

“Just a few sweets—my family recipe,” she replied, beaming with pride. “And I also found this beautiful trinket while traveling through Fontaine.” She held out a delicate pendant, glimmering with an array of colors. “I thought it would suit you.”

Alhaitham took the pendant gently, a soft smile gracing his lips as he inspected it. The sight of the usually stoic Acting Grand Sage displaying such warmth left the crew in awe.

“Alhaitham, how did you keep this from us?” Cyno said, crossing his arms. “I thought we were friends...”

“I didn’t think it was necessary to announce every detail of my personal life.” Alhaitham replied, his tone measured but laced with amusement.

Tighnari chuckled, shaking his head. “Well, you certainly surprised us. I didn’t expect you to be the type to keep a relationship under wraps.”

The woman, noticing the camaraderie and playful teasing, felt her cheeks flush slightly. “I guess I’m just lucky to have him. He’s more than just a scholar; he has a kind heart, too.”

Cyno raised an eyebrow. “And you must be quite the diplomat to have won over the infamous Alhaitham. We all thought he was married to his books.”

Kaveh snickered, finally recovering from the shock. “Clearly, you’ve enchanted him with your charm.”

Alhaitham cleared his throat, looking slightly embarrassed at the attention. “I appreciate your compliments, but she’s not just a charm; she’s someone who understands the value of knowledge and compassion.”

The woman’s smile widened at his words, her eyes sparkling with affection. “And I admire his dedication to his work, even if he can be a bit stubborn at times.”

“Stubborn? Never.” Cyno quipped, feigning innocence as he shot a glance at Tighnari, who rolled his eyes again, this time more dramatically.

“Okay, okay,” Tighnari interjected, trying to steer the conversation back to lighter topics. “So, who’s ready to play cards again? Maybe we can see if your girlfriend can beat Alhaitham in strategy?”

The laughter that followed filled the tavern, and as they resumed their game, Alhaitham’s girlfriend settled comfortably beside him. Her presence seemed to bring a new lightness to their gathering, and it was clear that the evening would be one to remember, filled with stories, laughter, and the warmth of friendship.

As the cards were dealt once more and Cyno continued his onslaught of dad jokes, Alhaitham felt a sense of contentment wash over him. With her by his side, he realized that life was not just about knowledge and duty but also about the connections that made every moment richer.

[johnbrand]

Breeder Boy

Adam hoisted the suspenders up slowly, his mind numb as he went through the motions of tightening each strap around his shoulder blades.

“Yeah, that's a good boy,” his best friend Isaac affirmed from behind. “That's my good, obedient breeder boy.”

Adam blinked. He could not remember why Isaac had taken to him after college. The two were practically opposites back then. Isaac was a popular lacrosse player with girls constantly at his side. Adam had been a data analytics nerd who had only managed to kiss one boy in his entire life. And it had been an accident. Their social circles would have never intercepted if it had not been for the Intro to Psychology course they had both taken as an elective.

They had been paired as partners in a simple project exploring different subsects of therapy. Adam and Isaac had been assigned with hypnotherapy, although going in it had been obvious which one of them was actually going to do the work. That was until Adam explained to Isaac what their subject was. The nerd had been shocked to see the jock’s sudden enthusiasm for the subject. Inspired by Isaac's curiosity, Adam had tried his best to answer every question Isaac posed to him.

"You are about to have one of the best days of your life.” Adam stood still as Isaac’s arms dropped around his head, a black bowtie ready to encircle his throat. “You will smile, laugh, maybe even cry at the sheer beauty of your woman. The ceremony and reception will be branded into your memory forever.”

Adam gulped, his face still emotionless as he tried to process everything. It was like his life had changed after meeting Isaac. After that project, they would be together almost all the time. Whenever Isaac was not at practice, partying, or getting laid, then he would be with Adam. At first, Adam did not understand the sudden friendship that emerged between them, but Isaac had told him to disregard it. In fact, there were a lot of things Isaac had told Adam to forget about.

While it had been too late to completely change his major, Isaac had reasoned with Adam that an accounting degree would be much more beneficial than his current computer sciences. That way, by focusing on business, he would have more time to do what he and Isaac loved, sports. Adam had protested at first, but after Isaac’s well-crafted arguments, his opposition was cleanly dismissed. 

After graduation, Isaac was able to spend even more time with Adam. The two often discussed so many different topics that Adam could not quite remember everything they had covered. It was strange how Isaac, someone he had known for only a tiny portion of his life, had known more about Adam than even Adam did. Isaac had clarified early on that he had understood Adam’s wants, goals, and needs. Isaac had joked that Adam should just forget about his former aspirations, as he knew them better anyway.

“Yup, don't resist it…atta boy,” Isaac praised as he secured the bowtie. Adam fidgeted with his ring, the cold metal foreign to his formerly naked finger. 

“That feels good, doesn’t it?” Isaac took notice. “You like knowing you're about to be married to a woman. You like that I helped you become an alpha male. You like to submit to the patriarchy and uphold the traditional masculine supremacy.”

Adam said nothing. It had been just over five years since they had first met. Five years since Isaac had begun reshaping his life, and where was he now? At 27, Adam was a successful businessman at a firm downtown, often working with clients beside Isaac. Adam now enjoyed lacrosse, tennis, and frequent pickleball. Adam spent mornings at the gym and evenings at the bar. And right now, he was about to marry his girlfriend of almost two years, the woman he had fallen in love with and was preparing to dedicate his life to.

“Just think, back in college you were nothing more than a faggy partner for what I thought would be a blow-over of a psych class.” Isaac, his best man, brimmed with excitement. “Now you’re worthy of being a man, a real man, who’s gonna slide that straightened cock into a fertile, tight pussy tonight."

“And at the heart of it all," Isaac sneered. "you were the one who began this whole thing. My good breeder boy.”

Adam blinked. Butterflies bounced around in his stomach as he tossed the suit jacket over himself. He was excited and nervous as he approached the doors, one of the the best days of his life beginning he entered into the church hall.

"Looking good, man!" Isaac cheered before whispering. “And don’t forget, that baby you're making tonight should be named Isaac.”

Adam chuckled. Isaac had been his best bro, had known more about Adam than he himself had after all. That honor only felt right.

[padfootagain]

Only an Almost (I)

Chapter 1 : For the Best

Hello!! Here is a new series! I’ve already finished writing and proofreading it, and I’ll be posting two chapters per week! I hope you’ll like it!

Please, tell me what you think!

*************************************

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader, friends with benefits AU

Warning: No explicit smut or nsfw content, but there are sexual themes and heavy make-out sessions (it’s a friends with benefits AU, I can’t really escape it), so 18+ only!

Summary: Andrew has been in love with you for years, and yet he has never confessed his feelings. But a night out celebrating the engagement of his best friend changes everything. However, you don't seem ready to be with him just yet. You make him an offer that he can't refuse... but will certainly regret.

Word Count : 2739

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

It was a logical decision.

That’s what Andrew kept telling himself. As he watched you pick up your clothes, scattered across his bedroom floor, he forced his mind to form the same thought over and over again.

This is for the best. There’s no choice.

It was part of the deal. You never stayed for the entire night, and he didn’t linger long enough to fall asleep in your arms. Made it easier. Avoiding getting attached, avoiding stepping into any type of complication. You had sex, and then you were gone. On the side, you were good friends.

Best friends.

Something like that. Something in between good and best, he would say. Good didn’t sound strong enough to describe your friendship. It explained why it all happened in the first place, why you started casually hooking up about three months ago. After your first kiss, you decided to establish a simple rule.

If we do this, it can’t be anything but sex. We can’t get attached like this.

Romantically, that’s what you meant by this. And Andrew got it, of course. He spent most of his time abroad, it was the only logical decision. Besides, he had tried before to have serious relationships, but every time the same scheme repeated itself: he would leave for tour, and everything would fall apart. The distance always extinguished the flame. That and the fact that he was so busy he barely had time to sleep, let alone dedicate quality time to anyone. And he understood, of course, he couldn’t complain about being dumped when he spent a grand total of 20 minutes on the phone with his partner in the span of a day, when he got lucky. He got it, the ghostly presence, the lingering pain of being apart, the estrangement that came with the oblivion of the other’s life. He knew what it felt like, and he understood that others were not ready to go through that for him. He wasn’t worthy of it. It was alright…

And he understood that you didn’t want to get dragged into his mess of a life. To be fair, he didn’t want to drag you into this either, and he agreed when you offered this arrangement. He didn’t feel like he had a choice that day, when you made him this offer so casually, in front of a cup of tea. He could have said no, but his feelings for you were way too strong for that. Better have a little bit of you than nothing at all…

Friends by day, sex by night, no romantic feelings. Sounded simple enough.

“Damn… where’s my other sock?”

You looked around frantically, searching for the tiny piece of garment. Andrew spotted it by the door. He didn’t say anything about it.

“You’re coming to Alex’s party tomorrow?” he asked instead, voice a little hoarse after the sounds you had torn from him tonight.

“Hmm… yeah, probably. He’ll have my head if I don’t, anyway.”

“Perhaps not your head, but definitely your sanity.”

“He does hold grudges like no one else…”

Andrew stared as you buttoned your jeans, still searching the room for your lost sock, the one he didn’t help you to find. He readjusted the blanket higher on his torso, feeling self-conscious now that he was the only one left naked.

“Want me to pick you up?” he offered, and you nodded with a grin.

“Yeah, that would be nice! That way I can get properly sloshed.”

He chuckled at that, bathing into the warmth of your laughter, smiling without a thought.

“Oh, and I need to go to your mother’s tomorrow!” you informed him, readjusting your shirt.

His shirt, as a matter of fact. His heart stumbled at the sight…

“Really?”

“Hmm… she wants to take pictures of several objects for her artwork. I’ve volunteered to go around Dublin with her tomorrow afternoon.”

“Thank you.”

“We both know I like Raine better than you. I’m only keeping you around to have her,” you teased, throwing Andrew a mischievous wink.

He tightened his hold on the sheets.

“Oh, I see. You’re only using me to get to her… and I thought you only used me for sex.”

“Don’t flatter yourself,” but he noticed the way you bit your lip, refraining a smile, and how you averted your eyes in shyness, and he loved the sight…

Your eyes fell on the lost item, and you let out a victorious cry picking up your sock, while Andrew swallowed back the lump in his throat.

You sat down on the edge of the bed to put your socks on, and he didn’t think as he sat up, leaning into your form. He didn’t wrap his arms around you, merely rested his shoulder against yours, revelling in the warmth escaping your body.

He pressed his lips to your hair, felt you tensing, saw you stopping your movements.

“Ring me when you’re home, okay? It’s late. Are you too tired to drive?”

“Don’t worry, I’m not that tired,” you answered, voice weaker than before, but he wasn’t sure why. Perhaps because the night was quiet but for the branches of trees singing in the wind outside, and it felt like the world had slowed down, like it was more peaceful than usual. Perhaps because you were uncomfortable. Hard to tell.

He moved away, just in case. Distance cutting your edges and his with cold. And yet Andrew remained but centimetres away.

“Alright. Still, tell me when you’re home, okay? Just to be safe.”

You seemed to relax, he didn’t know if he liked that reaction or not.

“I like it when you do that.”

It sounded like a confession, the words on your lips quiet and velvety, soft to the touch.

“Do what?” he questioned, tilting his head to the side a little.

“Get all worried about me.”

You gave him a smile, one that he offered back with ease.

“Hmm… don’t have a choice. You’re a menace behind the wheel.”

“Am not.”

“Are too! You almost killed us last month!”

“It wasn’t even my fault, there was a fucking sheep running across the road, coming out of nowhere!”

“Can’t believe you’re blaming the fauna for this…”

You both laughed at that, and when you grew quiet again, smile still lingering on your lips, you let your head fall to rest onto his shoulder, and it was Andrew’s time to relax. You lifted your hand to rest upon his chest, right over his heart. For a second, he felt embarrassed at the thought that you would feel how fast his heart was beating, but your palm was too warm against his skin, and he soon couldn’t care enough to worry.

He wrapped an arm around you, holding you close, but not too much, not as much as he would have wanted, too afraid you would push him away.

“I know that… that’s what friends are made for, but still… it’s nice. Thank you, Andy.”

He closed his eyes as he rested his lips against your hair; closed them too tightly, until it hurt.

“You don’t have to thank me for that,” he whispered into your skin, mouth drifting to press against your forehead. “You don’t ever have to thank me for that. I’m here. I’ll always be here.”

You hummed, leaning into him even more, and he felt all your muscles relaxing as he rubbed your back, palm flat against your spine, the curve so familiar under his hand by now.

You heaved a sigh.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Sure,” Andrew answered without a second thought, not thinking about what he had planned. He would move his schedule around for you anyway.

You looked up at him again, blinked a few times, as if to fall back onto earth. There was something dreamy in your smile.

“Good night, Andy.”

“Good night, Y/N.”

That was another one of your rules: no affectionate pet names.

He leaned down to kiss you, but you turned your cheek to his lips instead, and acted like it was nothing, like he had never been aiming for your mouth in the first place.

Third rule: no kissing without sex.

The next second, you were standing, walking towards the door. He stared as you walked out, listened to the padding of your feet on the tiles, the creaking of his staircase. He waited until the front door closed, and he let himself fall back into his pillows.

It was a logical decision, he didn’t have a choice.

Andrew, you absolute fool…

His mother was worried, which meant that Andrew was worried.

She was smiling at you as if nothing was wrong, as if the sunny afternoon truly was as bright as the beams coming across the green leaves of his parents’ garden trees.

Andrew was not fooled though. He knew his mother too well not to see the signs, to be blind to her slight frown, to the drifting downwards of her gaze, to the worried lip she kept biting on.

Raine didn’t say a word while you were here though, and it only worried Andrew more. You were a friend of the family; almost part of the family at this point. You were close enough to Andrew’s parents and brother to spend time with them on your own, just to see them. And they invited you often as well. If Raine wasn’t saying anything in front of you, it ought to mean that this was serious, that something terrible was happening. His thoughts drifted to his father…

“Andy? You’re okay?”

He blinked up at you, soothing the frown he had not noticed across his brow. He gave you a reassuring smile.

“Sure, why?”

“I don’t know… you look… worried. Is there something wrong?”

“No, nothing’s wrong. I was just lost in thought.”

You narrowed your eyes a little at him, clearly unconvinced, but Andrew shot you a smile, asked a question to draw the conversation back to you, and you yielded.

It was such a sweet afternoon, after all. You had spent some time taking pictures for Raine, and somehow had found your way to her garden, with tea and biscuits, a little high on sunlight and laughter. It was lovely. It almost felt like you and Andrew were not friends, almost like you were in your own family home. He pushed that thought away quickly though, taking a sip of tea and regretting that there was no burning effect of alcohol when he swallowed.

When you left to go home, Andrew was aware that he held you too tightly, for too long, that he let his lips linger against your cheek for more than a mere peck. But you didn’t push him away, and so he leaned further, allowed himself to be close, just for a moment.

You hugged Raine, promising to come back the following week for an artsy afternoon, and left as the sun abandoned the sky.

Andrew was washing the teacups when he finally asked his mother what was bothering her.

“Nothing, honey,” she reassured him, but he shook his head and gave her a hard look.

“Come on. Don’t lie to me. I know there’s something on your mind. Are dad and you okay?”

“Oh, darling… of course, we are. Don’t worry about us, we’re both fine. No, it’s… it’s you I’m worried about.”

Andrew couldn’t refrain a laugh, a mixture of relief and surprise.

“Me? Why would you be worried about me? I’m good.”

“Are you, though?”

She gave him that look, the one that pierced him to his soul, the one he couldn’t run away from. The one he knew would claim the truth, in the end. He felt like a child when she looked at him like that, like he had just stolen a cookie from the jar and was caught red-handed as he tried to hide the proof of his crime.

“I’m fine, mom. Don’t worry about me, I’m okay. I really am.”

But her gaze only hardened. Not in a cold way, on the contrary. It was a gaze of steel in its firmness, but that held all the love she had for him. His heart sank at the sight.

“Don’t lie. I know there’s something off between you and Y/N.”

Andrew struggled to swallow, looked away, fleeing. He stared at his hands still holding a teacup, and he noticed it was yours. There were traces of your lipstick on the edge of the pale porcelain. He traced it with his fingers absent-mindedly.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he replied, but his lie was obvious, his voice too low, too weak. In the sink, his fingers pushed the cup into the water, disappearing under soapy bubbles, and he left them there, in the warmth of the water, staring at the flesh that had disappeared, at your trace that was gone but that he hadn’t erased yet.

“Andy… you know that you can tell me anything. I’m your mother. You can always tell me anything that bothers you. That’s my job to help you. And I’m great at it.”

Her joke made them both chuckle, but he didn’t look at her. He rubbed at the stained spot on the cup instead, but blindly so, unable to see the destruction of your lips over the edge of the porcelain.

“I don’t know… it’s a little weird,” he whispered, struggling to find the right words and hating that about himself. How it was so much easier to write things down than to speak out words. They felt heavy on his tongue, had a wrong taste in his mouth.

“Why? What happened? Did you two fight?”

“No… no, we didn’t fight.”

“What is it, then?”

“We… We’re sleeping together.”

Raine stared at her son with wide eyes, her mouth dropping open. He chuckled at her reaction; clearly, she hadn’t been expecting that…

“What? When? How? What?”

“You’ve asked that one twice.”

“Wait, I don’t understand… if you two are finally being intelligent and are together, why do you look so sad?”

“I’m not sad.”

She gave him a look that was silently saying ‘I’ve birthed you, do not lie to me’.

He looked away again, tried to ignore the finally part of her question.

“We’re sleeping together. We aren’t together.”

“Oh…”

She seemed disappointed, leaned her back against the counter.

“How long?” she asked, after a heavy and lingering silence.

“A few months.”

“And you’re not dating her?”

“No, we’re not dating.”

“But you’re hanging out with her during the day, and sleeping with her at night.”

“Yeah.”

He struggled to swallow, cheeks turned crimson.

“Why on earth would you want that?”

She was blunt, as usual, but there was so much love in her question. So much worry for her son. Andrew wasn’t fooled, she was direct because she cared too much to circle around the issue.

“I’ve never said that I wanted that,” Andrew admitted in a whisper, feeling tears rise to his eyes, but he blinked them away, clenching his jaw to hold them in check.

“Oh, honey…”

She rubbed his back, her movement soothing. He rolled his eyes.

“Mom, don’t… I’m okay.”

“Casually sleeping with your friend… that’s not a good idea, Andy. Of course, you’re free to do whatever you want. This is your life. And I’ll always be here to support you, no matter what. Still…”

She heaved a sigh, but her son remained silent, and so she went on.

“You are too generous when you love, Andy. Be careful. Take care of yourself. For once, take care of yourself, before you take care of her. Can you do that for me?”

He finally pulled your cup out of the water. Your lipstick was gone, there was only the perfect white of the porcelain left under his thumb.

“Don’t worry about me, mom. I’m okay.”

“I know how you feel for her. This kind of… arrangement… it won’t end well for you.”

“Don’t be dramatic. I agreed to this. I’m okay with us just being casual, with nothing serious happening between us.”

But one did not fool a mother so easily. She gave him a look that let him know she understood him better than he did himself. And he had no doubt she was right about that.

Still, he put down the cup by the side of the sink to dry, picked up another, and washed the tea away again.

[rinhaler]

I Finally Decided On You

✧˖*°࿐ : 18+ only, no minors.    ✧. ┊ rin itoshi x f!reader

Genre: smut & angst Notes: in my feelings abt a friendship break up so have some angst heheheee Warnings: 18+, mutual pining, angst, pet names, cheating, dacryphilia, tit sucking ♡, vaginal sex, choking ♡, love bites, breeding kink, creampie ♡ Words: 5.8k

“You’re lonely, aren’t you?”

Your breath hitches as the words make their way into your brain. His eyes have been fixed on you for what seems like a lifetime, but it’s only after you hear him ask something so personal, so intimate, that you can bring yourself to look at him. His glimmering, jade eyes are so striking, so captivating, you can’t help but want to bare your soul to him.

“You shouldn’t ask me something like that.” you whisper, unable to hide your smile as you are both all too aware of the irony of your sentence. There are so many things neither of you should be doing right now.

And yet, here you are, allowing the 4am sky to encase your bodies in a melancholic blanket. You’re waiting for one more sentence to spill from his lips that will have your deepest secrets tumbling from yours.

You know him.

He knows you.

And it’s so comforting.

You’ve never felt like this with anyone before. He’s so easy to talk to, and even easier to be around. It’s almost like a punishment. The worlds cruellest joke that you’re being subjected to.

“You shouldn’t be in my bed, but you’re here. So, talk to me.” he smiles, effortlessly. A smile that he’d only ever show you. An expression that only you are worthy of and the only person he’d ever trust to experience it. It’s so loving. It’s like being home.

You’re quiet, your own smile fading slightly as you think about his question. What had you done to make him even ask it? You’re lonely. Is that true? You have friends, family, a lover. Realistically, you can’t be lonely.

“I am.” you tell him, honestly, finally finding his gaze once more. Allowing him to scan your trusting eyes so he can see there isn’t a trace of a lie. And he does, stare, until he looks at your lips briefly, and then back to your eyes.

“You’re lonely?”

“Yes.”

He hums, thinking about it for a moment. You don’t deserve to feel that way. Though it may be his heart talking. It might be the fact that he’s head over heels in love with you.

Every moment with you is so saccharine, so disgustingly dizzying that it could make him vomit from excess. He can’t get enough of you. He’s ravenous for you.

Your taste.

Each kiss you allow him to take is so seraphic, your candied lips cloying his insides. It hurts to be with you sometimes, he knows what this is and what it will be. He knows what he is to you and what he will never be. He hates himself, and honestly, he hates you a little bit in that same breath. Though he locks that feeling of loathing deep down inside, he doesn’t want to feel it. He doesn’t want to care that much.

Whatever you are to each other now, in this moment, is enough.

His face nears yours, and you observe him as his eyes close. Yours close too, gently, and you feel his lips on yours. His hand cups your face, his thumb gently caressing your cheek as he deepens the kiss only slightly. He pulls away, eyes glittering as he observes you. He’s making sure you’re okay, that what he just did was okay.

And it is.

He pulls you closer to him, enveloping your body in his before carefully planting his lips on your cheek. He sighs, a little. The heavy, disheartened breath rushing through your ear canal. It makes you shudder, so he holds you tighter.

“You aren’t alone, you know.” he tells you, quietly. You feel tears pricking at your eyes as he starts speaking. He cares, so much, you can almost feel his passion vibrating from his skin and passing through you. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“I know.” you sniffle. “It’s just hard.”

“I know.” he agrees, kissing atop your head as a show of comfort. He just can’t get enough of you. He can’t stop himself from being with you like this, even if he wanted to, he wouldn’t. These moments with you are his main source of happiness. Getting to know you so viscerally is everything to him. Whenever you’re together, like this, he gets to peel back another layer of who you are.

“I’m so—” you stop, your eyes catching his again before you brush away the thought. You’re playing with fire, with him. You’re letting him scrutinize your body as you bare your self-inflicted gaping wounds. Allowing him to decide whether to pour alcohol and salt into your ruined flesh. “I’m just sick of feeling like shit all of the time.” you sigh a little before laughing.

“Don’t.” he huffs, his thumb stroking your face again. It’s a bid to make your body submit to his. “I don’t like it when you perform for me.”

You smile, again, nodding in acceptance as you take his word as truth. It makes sense why he isn’t fond of you acting for him, though for some reason you can’t seem to help yourself. Wrapping your body in an invisible gauze as you do all that you can to prevent your lacerated skin from becoming infected by him.

“Rin?” you whisper again, almost hoping he won’t have heard you say his name. “Do you love me?”

The question almost wounds him. You see his eyes begin to tremor as he wonders if you want him to answer that. And answer it genuinely. He rolls onto his back, staring up at the ceiling. Your bodies are mirrored up above, and he can’t help but stare at his own reflection as he contemplates how to answer. His heart skips a beat when you inch closer to him, wrapping an arm around his torso as you caress him and await his response.

He hates how little effort you need to make to force him to smile.

“Yeah.” he tells you. But he doesn’t look at you, still staring at himself in the mirror above. It’s a confession for him as well as you. “I’m in love with you. Is that okay?”

Of course he’s asking for permission to love you. Though even if you were to say no, it’s not like he could just stop his feelings. It isn’t okay, of course it isn’t. Nothing about what you’re doing is okay. Whatever you’re not meant to do always makes you feel most alive. It makes you feel excited. And right now, you feel wanted. You feel loved.

You don’t feel lonely.

You’re quiet for a moment, but you hope the smile you’re donning will show that you’re appreciative of his honesty. It takes you a while to think about how to respond. You could say it back, but what good will it do? If you don’t say anything, you’re sure he’ll be upset, but he won’t tell you that. You don’t want to hurt him, that’s the last thing you want.

“Thank you.” you tell him.

He doesn’t say anything to that. He closes his eyes, a soft chuckle emanating from him as he processes the rejection. In his mind, that smart, logical mind of his, he knew you wouldn’t say it back. Why would you? Even if it was true, it’s too messy. It’s a disaster waiting to happen, you both know it, so why would you say it back? But then again, why would you ask his feelings in the first place? His heart is screaming at him with every aggressive beat against his ribcage. It’s telling him, despite the logic working overtime in his brain, that you love him too.

“Do you love me?” he wonders, finally allowing his head to roll to the side again so that you’re making eye contact once more.

And you’re silent. You can see in his eyes that he’s pleading with you to reciprocate his feelings. To verbalise them. He wants you to mean it, though. He’d rather you not say a word than lie to him.

But, he knows you.

He knows your mind body and soul and he truly believes that you feel the same way about him. So tell him, won’t you? Lay your heart bare and just tell him the truth. No matter what the world throws at you, he’s certain you can handle it, together. Whatever concerns you have, he’ll protect you. Any repercussions you think will follow you from following your heart, he won’t allow. He’ll do anything for you. Anything to be with you. So look into his emerald eyes and be honest with him.

Be honest with yourself.

“Please,” you start, “please never ask me that again.”

The words cut like a knife. Or rather, he feels like he stopped existing the moment you finish your sentence. It’s like being in a car accident and dying on impact. He looks up at the ceiling again, closing his eyes, knowing the tears are soon to pour from them if he doesn’t get a grip.

Why would you say that?

You still haven’t given a clear answer. And really, he knows why you said what you did. It’s self-preservation. Maybe you think you’re protecting him, too. But you aren’t. You’re the reason his heart beats and this is the reason that it will stop. Every moment from now will be agony. Without an answer, you’ve given him one. And he despises you, now. He thinks you’re selfish.

He thinks you’re a fucking coward.

“Then… what is this?” he wonders, still not daring to widen his eyes and give you the satisfaction of seeing him cry. You can barely stand to look at him now though. Not when he’s being like this. You don’t want to hurt him, truly. But there’s no use in giving him hope that isn’t there. This is for the best, you’re sure. “Have you just been using me for the last two years? When you’re… fucking lonely.” his own breath hitches and he wants to disappear. From your line of sight, from the room, from the fucking planet.

“It’s not like that, Rin.” you sigh, and it’s almost breathless as you try and conjure the right words to alleviate his pain. There’s nothing you can say that won’t hurt. The damage is done. You’ve broken him. “You know the first time was a mistake… and then it just kept happening… and then—”

“And then you—” he balls up his fists until his arms begin to tremble. But he takes a breath, anger leaving him as he exhales. He’s always been good at that. He always knows when he’s getting too worked up and knows how to take it down a notch and compose himself. He’s calculated with everything he does. But he supposes you’re the exception. There was nothing calculated in regard to you. He fell into this fucking mess with you, because it’s you. “… Don’t you think the fact we’ve been making the same ‘mistake’ for so long means it might not be a mistake.” he talks, quietly. You can’t tell if he’s asking you a question or simply speaking words for you to hear.

You don’t answer. What can you say? You can’t contradict yourself now. It’s a valid point, of course. Is a repeated mistake truly a mistake? Maybe you and he are made for each other. Being with him could be easy, if you wanted. Being honest with yourselves and those around you might be easier than you think. Being able to hold his hand and go out on dates like a normal couple. Could it really be so simple?

“I don’t know what you want me to say.” you respond, bluntly. It’s harsh. The words make your mouth swell with discomfort and a horrendous desire to burst into tears. Nothing else will get through to him, you think. Being nice is getting neither of you anywhere. You gulp, and it’s like swallowing razor blades as you see how fucking shattered his face becomes.

He scoffs, a little, and sits upright in bed. You chase him, somewhat, sitting upright beside him and placing your hand on his shoulder. And you gasp, quietly, as he shrugs away from your touch. Your defeated hands fall into your lap as you continue to sit beside him, your eyes alternate from looking at his side profile to your twiddling thumbs.

Rejection was always bound to come eventually. He wishes he never opened his mouth, though. The delusion could have carried on a little while longer. Why did you have to ask if he loved you? You surely knew already. His mind roars at him to run. He’s staring at his sneakers placed meticulously by his wardrobe as he thinks about where he could go. Anywhere away from here.

Away from you.

But the child in him… is resilient. He’s never been one to accept true defeat. He’s never been the type to give up on his dreams or quit when he truly believes there is a chance at happiness for him. You see his hand move to his obscured cheek, and you’re sure he’s wiping away a tear.

It’s all but confirmed when he looks at you. Teal eyes almost illuminate the room as they look at you. Crystalline droplets reside in his lashline, and his eyes keep shimmering as they take in every solitary detail of your beguiling face. He can’t lose you. You’re perfect for him.

And he loves you.

He leans towards you, and you don’t fight it. Your lips slotting beautifully against one another as you melt into his kiss. It’s prolonged and it’s deep. You feel as though he’s giving you everything he has. Everything he is as a final farewell. The thought of never seeing him again makes you break away, panting desperately before you comb his hair out of his face.

“What are you doing, Rin?” you whisper.

This time you’re left without an answer. He grips his fingers into your soft hips and helps you move above him, straddling him so that he can look up into the eyes of the woman he loves more than he ever has or will love anyone.

“Play with my hair, please.” he whispers back against your bare skin as he lifts your tank top to expose your breasts. You do as he asks, combing your fingers through his hair again as he sweetly kisses your erect nipples. The only sound filling the room is his puckered kisses and your laboured breaths.

You hum, intoxicated, as kisses turn to suckles. They’re soft and careful, your skin breaks out in bumps as your flesh tries to huddle together to keep in the warmth. Your heart skips a beat when he looks up at you, briefly, before focusing on your tits again. He wraps his arms tightly around your torso in a bid to pull you closer. Your cotton-clad mound humping against his straining cock in the process.

He grunts against your skin when he feels the wetness pooling on your panties transferring to his boxers. One of his hand roams to squeeze the fat of your ass, a squeaking yelp escapes you as you feel thick bruising fingers dig into your supple flesh. He gentle nibbles your swollen tits, eliciting a mewl from you that speaks to your infatuation with him. Whether you care to admit it or not, he knows your body enough to understand the truth.

“Rin,” you shudder, throwing your head back in an attempt to gain some distance from what is happening and retrieve your thoughts. He doesn’t stop, though. But his eyes meet yours again when you return. He’s listening. He’s clinging to your every thought. “I-Is this really what you want?” you ask him. And he nods, slowly, relinquishing one nipple from his mouth with a pop and licking his cherry bitten lips.

 “’m not a mistake, baby…” he tells you in hushed tones before sucking your neglected nipple momentarily. He means it, too. You don’t think he’s a mistake. In truth, you think the world of Rin Itoshi. You wish you met at a different time. Things could be how you both want them to be. But this is how things are. You feel tears you hadn’t given permission begin to roll down your cheeks as you think about how lowly he views himself because of you. You are a fucking coward, you always have been. “I can be right for you, princess. I can.”

You hear him sniff a little before he continues making out with your aching tits. And you push his hair out of his face again, getting a perfect view of his lusciously long eyelashes. You can’t see his pretty green eyes from this angle, they’re focused intently on your chest. But his eyes snap to your when he hears you sniffling too.

“Rin… I-Is this—?”

“Do you want to do that thing you like?” he asks, breath fanning over your spit soaked tits as he snaps you from your thoughts. He encourages you to move a little as he hooks his fingers into your panties and tries to pull them down your legs. It’s clumsy, and it makes you laugh as you shuffle around awkwardly until they’re off. And he throws them across the room before your lips crash together again.

Your arms wrap around his neck as you kiss him. He swallows your moans like they’re holy and he’s fucking greedy. He manages to snake his hand between your bodies to free his length. And your vision strays to see it. His gorgeous, pretty cock. It’s beautiful and pink, though the darkness of the room hides it well. You know it from memory by now. But you can’t mistake the drooling precum leaking from his slit and down his shaft as he strokes his length at a steady pace while he kisses you again.

But you break it once more.

“You like it… you like it, too.” you smile, thinking back to what he’d asked you moments ago. He smirks against your lips, kissing you again before looking down at his length as he attempts to guide it into your heat.

“That’s right.” he nods, licking his lips. “’n it feels the best when you ride me… so sit on it.” he commands. He clenches his teeth as his tip sits comfortably in your sticky interior. You’re so tight and wrap around him so heavenly. As though you’re made solely for him. In his mind, though, that’s exactly what you are. He hisses, eagerly, as he feels the conflicting constrict of your cunt tightening and releasing repeatedly as he remains there. It’s like you aren’t sure if you’re trying to suck him in further or push him out completely.

His fingers curl around your dainty wrist, guiding your hand to his neck and encouraging you to squeeze. You do, softly, and you can’t help but smile when he laughs breathily.

“Sit on it, princess. S’all yours.”

The squeeze becomes tighter as you slowly sink on his length. Your jaw drops willingly as you moan through the stretch. And Rin, God, he’s fucking beautiful. His eyes roll over white as your pussy envelops him until you feel his pretty tip nudge your g-spot. You kiss his cheek. Again, and again and again until his vision returns to you.

He likes it. No, he loves it. But only because it’s you. He’s been with plenty of women, but he’s never been in love. He’s had feelings for partners, but never love. He can’t imagine letting any of them choke him the way you do. It makes him heady, but only because it’s you. The first time you did it he wanted to protest, to tell you in no uncertain terms that he isn’t interested in that kind of thing. But the word no could barely escape his lips before he came inside you after you squeezed the sides of his neck oh so deliciously.

“F-uck, Rinnie…” you moan as you start to rock your hips against him. His hands gently hold your waist and help you in your efforts, your breath catching in your throat as your clit catches against his pubis and trimmed hairs. “You’re s-so deep. Feel you h-here…” you point to your lower abdomen as you carry on rocking against him, your grip on his neck easing as you feel pleasure begin to surge through your nervous system.

He's speechless, though. He knows he’s big and doesn’t feel a need to reiterate it. Instead, he pushes his palm flat against your tummy as you continue to get yourself off. You moan, louder. Drool forming in the corner of your mouth as you keep going and going until your legs begin to give. And he pities you, he does. So much so that he holds your hips tightly and helps you rise and fall on the full length of his cock again and again.

Each impale is rapturous. The pleasure is fucking blinding as his heavy tip slams repeatedly against your sensitive soft insides and you mewl blaringly, no care or consideration for neighbours that might be trying to get a full eight hours before that dreaded sunrise approaches any minute now. You can’t possibly care, not when a cock so perfectly made to mould the shape and ridges of your pussy to suit it’s domineering size is ruining you so divinely.

“Don’t stop.” he reminds you, his hand covering and squeezing your own around his willing neck, encouraging you to persevere. The way your clutching fingers hug the column of his throat is beauty personified. Like a scene from a renaissance painting before your very eyes. And his eyes are blown to hell, full of lust, “harder.” he smirks, greedily. And you always do as you’re told. You want to be good for him after being so cruel. You want to please him after being so cold. You want to love him after being so harsh.

“I—” you start, your words becoming trapped in your throat as your cowardice springs to the forefront of your mind. Though, is it really cowardice? Or is it just the right decision for both of you? For peace of mind and an easy life, it is.

“Yeah?” his eyes practically glitter in expectation as he awaits your sentence to be brought to completion. You are cruel, cold and harsh. Because you’ve gotten his hopes up yet again. And you can’t have that, you just can’t.

“I’m, c-close…” you alert him. His eyes widen in surprise. It hasn’t been so long since you started. Are you lying? He can usually tell. He studies your face and feels the way your cunt constricts around his length as you draw near your demise. You’re honest, only sometimes.

“N-N.. uh… can you hold it? F-For me, princess?” he asks, pleads, really, if his watery eyes are anything to go by. You aren’t sure you can, but you nod anyway. You’ll try your damndest, for him, anything for him.

He manoeuvres you carefully onto your back so you’re lying beneath him. You remain wrapped around him the entire time, like he can’t bear to be apart from you for even a second. You can’t blame him, either, you don’t want to remember what life feels like without him snug inside of your welcoming cunt.

His eyes roam your body as he cages you in below him. Emerald jewels taking in each and every inch of your perfectly bare skin. Every detail, every crevice and pore. It’s all so beautiful to him, and hasn’t become a boring sight to behold in the entire two years you’ve been doing this.

Both of your hands cradle his head, fingers interlocking through the back of his hair. He looks into your eyes and you can’t help but smile. This is how your life should be. When you see how much love pours from his eyes as he looks at you, you know this is how things are meant to be. But it’s a shame, they aren’t. You feel your heart break in two as reality crashes around you once again. But he leans down to kiss you, silently asking your permission to keep going.

“Please, Rin.” you nod.

“Okay, I’ve got you.” he kisses your neck as he begins to shallowly thrust into you again. You mewl softly as you feel him suckle the skin covering your clavicle, and it’s sure to bruise, but you don’t care. You’re sick of caring, now. You just want to feel this. Enjoy this moment. You want to enjoy Rin.

He pushes your thighs gently, spurring you to wrap your legs around his hips in a bid for you to hug him tightly. You hook your feet against one another, and you feel like a koala clinging onto a tree. You don’t mind though. You feel safe, like this. A safety you’ve never felt from anyone at any time. He’ll keep you safe, always, because he loves you. All he wants in this moment is for you to feel good and for him to be the reason. You cock your head, curiously. And he wastes no time satiating your lust with a kiss.

Your moans feel suffocating as your throat swells with the desperate need to share them with him. But you can’t. Not when he’s pressing his lips to yours and trying to inhale your every breath and any other offering you can muster for him. He can’t let you go for even a second, he thinks. This is all he has. He needs to remember.

He looks upset when you turn your head to break the kiss, but his thrusting doesn’t cease. They slow, however. Opting to fuck you deeper. He wants to explore depths in your cute cunt that neither of you know even existed.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, voice quiet but laced with concern. It’s hard to even think as his thrusts seem to be whisking your brain into a pink mushy paste.

“I can’t—” you pant, “hold it… m-much longer!” you warn him.

“Oh.” he chuckles, and burrows his head into the crook of your neck. He kisses. Sucks. Makes it known that you’ve been with him. A final bid to make you his, though it will surely amount to nothing. “That’s okay, let go, baby…” he tells you.

You bite your lip. A momentary gesture before you find your pleasure crescendo from his faithful pace. He kisses sweetly along your jawline, humping into you hard enough that there is a steady slapping resounding through the bedroom. You note how the sun seems to rise and birds begin to chirp as you topple over the edge of your orgasm.

He could bathe in your sweet moans for the rest of his life, he thinks. They seem to harmonise with the birds singing outside. Your fingers dig and claw into his shoulder blades as you don’t let up. It’s all so tantalizing, a song he’d happily play on repeat for the rest of his miserable life if he could.

You clamp around him and feel a swell of pride in your chest as you hear him moan for you, too. Your cunt floods with warmth and you’ve never felt so wanted. Part of him wishes you weren’t on birth control. Part of him wishes that it would fail so that there’s a reason he can truly make you his. But he knows he isn’t that lucky. And he knows it’s wrong to want those things, too. He doesn’t even want a kid, really.

He just wants a reason to keep you.

Your chest heaves as he collapses on top of you, hugging you closely. You fear that your sweaty bodies may meld together permanently, until the breeze from the open window rolls in. Cooling your dampened skin slowly but surely. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad, though. Being stuck to him. There’s always fantastical ideas conjured from absurd imaginations that give you cause to be together. It’s the only way, you think.

It can’t be as simple as you want to be together.

You can’t just love each other so much you can be together.

You need a reason.

A very good fucking reason.

“Are we going to be okay, Rinnie? Things haven’t changed, right?” you ask him, almost scared to speak but not enough to stop the flow of your words. You feel his body tense up, and at that point you know things have indeed changed. But change can be good… you might just be delusional, though.

“I’m going to shower.” he says, coldly, peeling his body from yours. And it stings. He couldn’t give you an answer, and you know that translates to him only having an answer you won’t like. He’s cruel, mostly, but never with you. With other people he can be rude and mean. But he’d rather be silent than do that to you. And it hurts. Fuck, it hurts. It’s all such a mess and everything is fucking ruined. “… are you coming?” he asks, looking back at you as he heads towards the bathroom.

And there it is.

The flame of hope he can never truly let die when it comes to you.

Your eyes flicker open, the room fully bathed in the light of the mid-morning sun. Rin is sitting at the edge of his bed. Legs covered by grey joggers and his torso bare. The shadows and light contrasting each other and painting an alluring portrait of toned musculature across his back. He shields it from you, though, as he pulls a t-shirt over his head.

He stands up, collecting the towel he dropped on the floor as he got changed. And that’s when he sees you’re finally awake again. He curses himself when he smiles at you, still unable to believe how easily you can make him do so.

“How was your nap?” he asks, calmly, tossing the towel expertly into his laundry bin.

“I don’t even remember falling asleep…” you admit.

Though you do remember cuddling into his side after your shower. Your towel is loose around your body, the one wrapped around your hair is crumpled up atop your pillows. He didn’t sleep a wink, he savoured the feeling of you clinging onto him like you might actually love him. But his mind was also plagued by the future. About what happens next. He doesn’t get nervous, usually. But now, as he looks at you in your most natural form, he’s legitimately scared. Scared of everything crashing down around him.

“I… your clothes.” he tilts his head, gesturing to the folded clothes on your bedside cabinet. You thank him, quickly, dropping your towel and hurriedly getting into your jeans and tank top you wore over here in the middle of the night. “I want to be with you, properly.” Rin confesses, focusing intently on his hands before daring to look up to you. Your expression is sullen, unsure of how to respond. You hadn’t expected to hear him say something so bold, not after what you said to him earlier. But you suppose he’s had time to think.

“I just don’t know what you want me to say, Rin.” you sigh, shaking your fingers through your still damp hair. Little droplets flying to the wood floor below.

“I want you to tell the truth… I know you love me. I know you’re just scared. I know you want to be with me, too. I don’t get why you’re doing this. I don’t know why you’re punishing yourself… or me.” he approaches you, walking around the bottom of the bed and grabbing your shoulders with fervour as he wills you to be honest for the first time in your life.

“No.” you shake your head and move away from him. “It isn’t right, you know it isn’t.”

“It’s not right? I’ve loved you for two years and you’re telling me that’s wrong? And I know you feel the fucking same, so please, please baby—”

“I have to go, I can’t do this.” you feel fresh tears roll down your face as you begin to search for your purse. You feel like your fucking heart is going to explode. And he doesn’t bother hiding his upset, either. Because he’s made up his mind.

“This was goodbye, then.” he informs you, and your movements halt as you look at him.

“What?”

“I’m not being this… joke. I’m not going to be your shoulder to cry on when you’re lonely. I’m not going to fuck you, you can’t just come here when you feel like it. I’m done, I can’t do it.” he takes a deep breath as he finishes, knowing that this is really over. It’s killing him. “I love you, and it hurts. This really hurts. But you’re not the girl I thought you were. I thought you were kind and I know you love me too and that’s why it’s fucking— I feel like I’m dying. I don’t get why you’re denying yourself of this.”

You sigh, slipping your feet into your white slides and trying to fight back tears. He thinks everything is so simple. He thinks you can both just live a fairy tale life and be happy, but that isn’t realistic. He isn’t being realistic and maybe that’s your fault. You thought you’d been clear about what this is between you. You hadn’t intended to make him feel used. You didn’t want to hurt him and you didn’t want things to end like this.

“Okay.” you shrug, fingers grasping the door handle as you prepare to leave.

“What’s so fucking special about Sae?” he sobs, quietly. You can’t bear to look at him. Your heart is already breaking and you know looking at his defeated face will give your vital organ cause to split into quarters. “As kids, he was always better at football. He’s older, he’s the favourite. But he doesn’t even treat you right, he doesn’t love you. I do, I love you so what’s so special about him, princess?” he drops his weight onto the bed below, sitting on the edge again as he wills you to face him. His stomach ravaged by butterflies as he waits for an answer. Any kind of answer that will give him some clarity.

“Nothing’s special about him, Rin…” you sigh, again, giving into his desire and offering him the eye contact he craved. “I just met him two years and a few days before I met you.” you sniffle loudly before hurrying out of the door, slamming it behind you unintentionally as you run to the elevator.

He lets his head fall into his hands as he begins to bawl. The knowledge finally setting in that this is really the end of this chapter of his life. The story of you and him is complete and the ending is fucking devastating. He rests his head against the wet pillows you’d left in such a hurry. The scent of your lotions and perfume still clinging to them. And he cries more, covering his face entirely with his hands.

He’ll always lose to Sae, that much is clear.

If only he’d met you first.

© 2023 rinitxshi

[another-lost-mc]

You don't realize what you have until it's gone.

Too Late Now | Lucifer x gn!Reader

Content Warnings: Major character death (Reader), Angst with No Happy Ending. Unrequited love, memory flashbacks and a dream sequence, brief mentions of blood/fatal injuries (cause unspecified).

Word Count: 2.7k words

Lucifer will never forget your last night in the Devildom. He knew long before that moment that you wanted a pact with him. You reminded him often with your not-so-subtle comments about how it felt like something was missing, that you wished the two of you could be even closer.

Unlike Solomon, Lucifer considered your request seriously, debating giving part of himself to you the way his brothers had. But he was proud, and he wanted to make absolutely sure you were worthy of having a pact with him. He resisted you to the very end, even though your persistence was charming, at times.

Lucifer was sitting at the dining room table reading the morning’s paper when you shuffled in, still wearing your sleep clothes like you just crawled out of bed.

When you realized he was there, you yawned and stretched your arms up high above your head. The cropped shirt you wore rode up your belly and he could see some of his brothers’ pact marks etched into your skin. He averted his gaze before he was tempted to stare.

“Good morning, Lucifer!” you said cheerfully, trailing off into another quiet yawn.

You pat your stomach and rested your hand over Beel’s pact mark. “I was just thinking that I have room for another pact mark somewhere, maaaaybe right-” you paused, patting the space above your heart, “here. What do you think? Know any demons interested in making a pact with a ‘lil human like me?”

He scoffed and flicked his wrist, turning the page and barely sparing you another glance. “I’m sure you can find several willing demons if you parade yourself down the street like that,” he suggested dryly.

“Aww, Luci, you’re no fun.” You pouted your lips and he refused to smile, no matter how cute you looked.

Realizing your attempt to seduce him - badly - into a pact had failed, you gave up the ruse and headed towards the kitchen. “I’ll make us some coffee!”

You faced each other that last night in his private study, the cursed TSL album played softly in the background while the fireplace crackled next to you. Both of you were bathed in shadow and flame. He finally gave into temptation to bind you to him and he made you his, his mark etched into your skin forever, but you still looked dissatisfied. 

Lucifer realized there were emotions swirling in your gaze that you always tried to hide from him - hope, longing, desire. He knew what else you wanted from him, but he couldn’t bring himself to close the rift between you. It was his last line of defense, the only thing keeping him from becoming yours completely. You were going home, and whatever relationship you wanted with him was about to come to an end. He thought it would be easier this way.

“Lucifer, I–” you started to say, but he grabbed your shoulders and pulled you to him. Whatever you tried to say next was muffled against his chest. He looked down at you and pretended the tears pooling in your eyes didn’t hurt him.

“Don’t,” he warned you quietly. “You have your own life to live, and I promise you that your friendship is more than enough.” He held you like that while you cried quietly against his chest. When he finally convinced you to go to your room to sleep, he stayed up drinking in front of the fireplace and wondered if he made the right choice.

The next morning, it was like nothing happened. You still greeted him in that sickeningly sweet and cheerful voice of yours, and his brothers hovered around you for your attention while they said their goodbyes.

When you promised Lucifer you’d see him again soon, eyes fiery with determination, he believed you would find a way to make it happen. He wondered if things might turn out differently the next time you meet; he wasn’t sure he had the power to resist you a second time.

During the first two weeks after your return to the human world, Lucifer tells himself it’s not bitter regret that swirls uncomfortably at the pit of his stomach and makes his heart ache. His brothers aren’t handling your departure very well, and he refuses to let himself be made a fool by his emotions. He has to be strong and set an example for the rest of them. He can’t let one mere human ruin him. He’s determined to carry on as normal, as though you were never there to begin with.

He will not visit your old room until your scent fades away.

He will not trace the outline of his pact mark with you and wonder if you can feel his fingertips on your skin when he does it.

He will not miss you.

Lucifer doesn’t dream often. Sometimes he does, and he dreams of white feathers burning around him while he falls into a dark abyss. Other times, he dreams of random memories of his brothers, or his long lost sister. In the three months since he last saw you, he’s dreamt of you, too.

But the dream he has tonight is different from the others. You’re both trapped in a grey void. He wants to go to you, but Lucifer can’t move no matter how hard he tries. You’re so close, just out of his reach. There’s something unsettling about your expression - your small, bittersweet smile lacks the mischievous humor he’s so fond of. Your eyes are serious and sad; he thinks you look defeated. 

“I’m sorry,” you say weakly, like you’re talking to him from the opposite end of a tunnel even though he’s only a few feet away from you. The words echo in the empty space around him even though you’ve grown silent.

He doesn’t understand what’s going on, and he wants to ask you what you mean, but he’s unable to speak. You flicker before his eyes, fading in and out of focus like a projection. It’s eerie at first, and he realizes he’s looking at different versions of you because you keep changing.

In one moment, you look like you did the last time he saw you. Then suddenly, your image becomes distorted. All he sees is that one of your eyes is swollen shut and blood drips down the side of your face, a gnarly gash split across your temple. Your teeth are bloody when you open your mouth to speak again, but there’s a roar building in his ears, and suddenly you’re gone and he can’t see you anymore–

Lucifer wakes up with a gasp. There’s searing pain behind his eyes and he groans while he holds his face in his hands. He’s trembling, and he feels cold and empty, and he wants to forget the haunting image of your broken face. Eventually the sleepy fog lifts from his mind, and he realizes someone is pounding on his bedroom door. His brothers shout his name outside his room, and he thinks he can hear someone crying.

It’s only then that he glances down at his bare chest and realizes that his pact mark with you is gone.

Lucifer was working on his third stack of documents to review and sign when there’s a quiet knock on his door. He glanced at the clock - 9:48pm. He thought he told his brothers he was busy this evening and he didn’t want to be disturbed.

He was prepared to string up whoever had the nerve to interrupt him, but he froze when he pulled the door open and found you instead. Your hand was raised like you were just about to knock again, and you dropped it hastily and grinned at him.

“Hi Luci,” you said in that cutesy sing-song voice of yours, “I brought you something.”

He realized that you were holding a large bowl out to him. He sniffed the air and couldn’t contain his surprise. “Shadow hog stew?”

You nodded enthusiastically. “Beel said it was your favourite. I made it earlier, but you never showed up for dinner. Your phone must be broken, by the way. I only tried calling and texting you like, a million times to tell you to come eat with us.”

Lucifer put his phone on do-not-disturb for a reason: you and your incessant nagging.

“I’m busy,” he said irritably, and he glared when you just smiled and shoved the bowl at him anyway.

“Well, you’re pretty clever. I’m sure you can figure out a way to eat a bit of food while you finish your work.” You headed back towards the stairs leading to the main floor. “There’s more in the kitchen if you want some!” You called to him over your shoulder, waving him goodnight before you disappeared from view.

Lucifer sat at his desk and stared at the bowl before he picked up the spoon. He decided that wasting something as decadent as shadow hog stew might not be proper form, and he tried a hesitant mouthful. And then another. And another after that.

He waited until he was sure you were in your room and fast asleep before taking the empty bowl to the kitchen for seconds.

The familiar scent of shadow hog stew catches Lucifer’s attention and he leaves his office to visit the kitchen. It’s a rich, hearty dish that was normally reserved for special occasions. He is very picky with how it’s prepared, and most of his brother’s don’t have the patience to make it properly. He hasn’t had it since you–well, he hasn’t had it in a long time.

“What’s the meaning of this?” he asks Satan, who is stirring the large pot of stew on the stove.

“I - I mean, we - thought you might like to try having something different tonight,” Satan says carefully, glancing at his older brother from the corner of his eye. “There’s some concern that you’re not eating enough.”

Lucifer opens his mouth to argue, because he is not some child that needs to be coddled, but he looks closer at the open recipe book on the counter. There are notes scribbled in the page margins where ingredients and measurements are crossed out and re-written. There’s also a pink sticky note on the side of the page, and he can still make out the familiar writing:

☆ one of Luci’s favs! ☆

It feels like there’s a heavy stone in his stomach, and Lucifer turns around and storms away from the kitchen before the feeling makes him nauseous.

“Where are you going? This is almost ready!” Satan calls to him.

“I’m not hungry,” Lucifer snarls, heading to his study and slamming the door behind him.

Lucifer startled when you dangled a paper bag in front of his face. “Can’t you see that I’m working?”

You sat in the chair across from him at his desk. “Yes, yes. All that important paperwork, I know. But I think it’s time to take a break, don’t you?”

He took the bag you offered him and pulled out the black…whatever the item is supposed to be. He held it up with his fingers. “Am I supposed to know what this is?”

You clapped your hands excitedly. “It’s a bath bomb!”

Lucifer gave you a deadpan stare. “It’s a what?”

“A baaaath boooomb,” you exaggerated the pronunciation slowly for his benefit. “It’s like fancy bubbles. You drop it into the water and it makes baths 500% more fun. You should try it.”

Lucifer sniffed at the black, strangely shaped item in his hand. “It smells like roses.”

You nodded. “Yep, and citrus, too. You’ll smell amazing afterwards, don’t you think?”

He glanced at it warily. “It has glitter in it. And this dark colour can’t be good for the porcelain tub. Don’t you think this will stain it? Who do you expect to clean up after this?”

You waved away his concerns with a grin. “Okay, so maybe glitter’s not your jam, and the cleanup might be a pain, but I promise it’s worth trying. I’ll even help you scrub the mess after.”

He put the bath product back into its paper bag and tossed it to you. You weren’t expecting it, and you just managed to catch it before it fell to the ground and shattered into a thousand pieces. “I’m not interested in childish nonsense. Give it to Asmo instead.”

You stood up from your chair with a resigned sigh. “Fine, you win this round. But for what it’s worth, I do think you’re working too much these days. You should take a break. A bit of relaxation won’t kill you.”

Lucifer knocks on Asmo’s door. When his brother answers, Lucifer pushes a basket into his hands. “These were in the bathroom. I assume you can find some use for them, since no one else will.”

Asmo opens the basket and smiles at the small collection of colourful bath bombs you purchased during your stay in the Devildom. “I forgot they bought these. Did you know that they gave Solomon money to buy them in the human world? You can’t even buy these on Akuzon.”

Lucifer can’t imagine why you’d go to that much trouble for something so trivial. “I didn’t know they liked baths enough to spend their hard-earned money on such ridiculous frivolities.”

Asmo glanced at his brother and hesitated before speaking. “Well, they didn’t like baths. They bought these for…someone else to use.” Asmo reached into the basket and picked up a black rose-shaped bath bomb and held it out to his brother. “I think you should keep this one.”

There was something knowing in Asmo’s gaze, and something inside him cracked. He shook his head and walked away before he said - or did - something stupid.

Lucifer’s still not sure how he ended up outside your old bedroom door. He felt numb and he wasn’t paying attention to where his feet were taking him. When you left the Devildom, he resisted the temptation to visit your old room. Since your death, he pretended the room didn’t exist.

The door hinges are creaky from lack of use, and he opens the door just enough so he can slip inside before closing it behind him. Judging by the dust in the air, he doesn’t think his brothers have visited your room since your passing either. The room has grown cold and desolate in your absence. He has the urge to board it up and lock it away so that no one else can ever use it.

Lucifer’s not sure what he expects to find when he examines your empty shelves and starts opening random drawers in your vanity. Maybe you left something behind, something he can keep to remember you by; it’ll remind him years from now that you’re the reason why the hole in his heart exists.

There’s a blue sticky note inside one of the drawers. He nearly glances over it, except he notices that the writing is still legible, not yet faded by time. He assumes it’s an old reminder to yourself about homework you had to do, or maybe a shopping list on a night when it was your turn to cook.

He wonders what kind of note you would write today if you could see him now. You were always leaving notes all over the house for him and his brothers to find. He used to hate the ones you left in his office that reminded him to take breaks and to drink something other than coffee. 

He misses those notes now. He misses you.

He swallows around the lump in his throat, and the note shakes in his hands when he summons the courage to read it:

Are you rummaging through my old room because you miss me? I’ll be thinking about you from the human world. Love you! ♡

Something inside him finally breaks. He can’t stop himself when he finally confesses his feelings for you in a hushed whisper, heard by no one else except the memory of you that haunts him.

Read more: Lucifer Masterlist | Obey Me Masterlist

[atrwriting]

bffs -- alpha!peter parker x omega!reader

hi everyone :) I know this is different than what I usually write, but like I had to lol. you'll see just trust me

as always, warnings: filthy unapologetic smut, alpha x omega relations, unprotected sex (wrap it y'all), dom!peter, sex between friends

anyways...

your heat had come.

you knew it. for days, you knew it would come. there was nothing you could do to prevent such a violent attack on your senses, mind, and body — especially since there was no alpha that you would or could think to call to help you for a couple of days.

that type of… agreement required a lot of things. one, you had to be able to trust the alpha. they would have to be able to hold back their own urges to not injure you or claim you, and they would have to understand that this was an arrangement — not a relationship. that agreement also factored in how you would basically be bedridden and useless for a few days, needed to be absolutely coked out on oxytocin, and needed to be reminded to eat and drink for a few days. there were no alphas that came to mind when going over all of these requirements in your head.

well… that’s a lie, if you’re being frank with yourself.

there was one.

there was one, but he was off limits. completely off limits.

peter parker.

peter parker was your best friend, all throughout college. you studied different things, but had a few core classes together. that led to you staying close all throughout college and post grad. you weren’t exactly sure why you had hit it off so well, given the fact that he could be a bit goofy at times, always ran off to do something secretive, and was still in love with an ex that he wouldn’t cough up the name to. you didn’t even really understand how he could be an alpha — he could be quite nervous and not confident with his thought process or actions, but you surmised that made him more agreeable to be friends with. he didn’t have an ego, even though he was an impressive individual, and that’s why you admired him.

however, when you did think about him as an alpha… that was when the lines of friendship were crossed. all you could think about were the state of his eyes looked when he was focusing on something he deemed worthy of his attention. they would darken, and he would not tear himself away from the task until it was completed. before he was satisfied, there was a permanent crease on his forehead and between his brow. his lips would part slightly, and every so often his tongue would drag across his lips before his teeth tugged his bottom lip into his mouth. when he especially got frustrated with a task, he would do all of those things at once while he would lean back in his chair and deeply sigh. his impressive chest and arm muscles would be taut and on full display as he dragged his large, open hands throughout his hair and closed his eyes for a moment. you weren’t sure what was going on between those closed eyes in his brief moment of relief, but when they opened… nothing could stop peter parker.

fuck, you thought. i have to stop.

just thinking about peter like that made something twist and turn in your abdomen. part of you knew you were pathetic by how creepy and easy it was to rile you up if peter working was what got you, but you couldn’t care — not in this state.

that was when your phone buzzed.

annoyed, you grabbed your phone and the screen illuminated.

peter: still on for today?

fuck, you thought.

you: can’t. i’m sorry. something came up.

three dots appeared, and then disappeared. you immediately felt bad for cancelling on such short notice, especially to someone as sweet as peter. you hoped he wasn’t upset or angry with you. the three dots, signaling he was typing, then reappeared.

peter: you okay? what’s up?

fuck, fuck, fuck. you were and always strived to be punctual and considerate, and he knew that. he knew you would never cancel on him unless something was wrong. damn you for being such a good person, and damn parker for being so perceptive and an even better person. fucking christ…

you: i don’t feel well today. i’m really sorry

peter: no worries, feel better :)

you sent a quick thank you before clicking your phone off and rolling back into bed. you wrapped yourself in the covers, the shape resembling a burrito, and tried to sleep the best you could. the air conditioner was blasting as high as it could and the sheets were cool and crisp against your skin. your heat was not at its peak, thankfully, and because of that you were able to find some sleep for the next few hours.

that is… until you woke up.

to a fucking knock at the door.

startled, you ripped the covers off of you and whipped your head towards the door of your studio apartment. there was a person outside, as you could see from the shadow of two feet underneath the door. the person was whistling a tune you had heard before, and only one person usually whistled it…

fucking peter.

you adjusted your shorts and cropped shirt before hopping out of bed. you hadn’t smelled him yet, so you thought you would be able to handle a small interaction with him before politely kicking him out.

you opened the door, and immediately regretted the decision.

there stood peter with a small smile on his face, and food in hand. he was clad in a flannel, dark shirt and jeans, and thick boots made for walking in the city. his hair was perfectly tousled back, and his attractive face was on full display.

as was how delicious he smelled.

“fuck —!” you gasped, rolling away from the door to hide from the doorway’s view. you pressed yourself against a wall in your apartment. “peter — you shouldn’t —“

“what’s wrong?” he asked, immediately stepping into your apartment and in front of you.

god… he must’ve thought you looked so pathetic. there was a light sheen of sweat on your skin, skimpy pajamas, and your styled hair was ruffled from last night’s sleep. you were breathing quickly, with any part of your body you could manage pressed against the cool drywall.

he hurriedly placed down the food on a neighboring counter, and stepped towards you. “sweetheart, are you —“

“don’t,” you snapped sadly. “yes.”

“did you call anyone?” he asked, almost accusatory.

you shook your head as your body trembled.

“it’s dangerous not to,” he curtly reminded.

“i know, i know… ” you whispered softly.

“what can i —“ he began, not really sure knowing how to continue. “can i help with anything?”

you shook your head. “peter — you have to go — you smell so good and it’s — it hurts so bad, peter.”

the pain of desire and arousal spread from your core, to your womb, to your chest, and every single one of your limbs. you felt the top layer of your skin begin to buzz, and you whined at the feeling. you tried not to breathe through your nose, because when you did… every single muscle fiber in your body was screaming at you to reach for peter and ask him to help.

but your feet remained planted… just barely.

peter’s jaw clenched as his eyes drifted up and down your body. “...you smell good, too.”

your eyes immediately flicked up to his face, your expression wild. “don’t imply anything like that to me in this state. i have no control, and i don’t want to make you uncomfortable, peter — you’re my friend. please, peter, you should —“

“who said you were making me uncomfortable?” he took a small step towards you once more.

you stared into his eyes.

they were dark.

they were dark, and focused... just how you liked them.

you whined in pain, trying to mask it as a hum but failed.

“the question is...” he began. “am i making you uncomfortable?”

you tried to control of your labored breathing, but it was difficult when his scent invaded every single one of your senses. “no, peter, but —“

“would you want this,” he gestured his hand between the two of you, “if you weren’t in heat?”

you couldn’t stop yourself. you nodded in agreement, and looked down to the floor in shame. tears began to leak from your eyes at the pain that sent shockwaves all throughout your body. it was growing more and more difficult to remain upright.

“then what’s the problem, sweetheart?” he asked in his new york drawl. “you want me to take care of you?”

“fuck…” you seethed, his words scratching at every itch you had in your body. “you can’t say th-things like that, peter…”

“why not?” he asked, feigning innocence. “want me to stop?”

you didn’t answer.

he took one more step, and you could’ve crumbled then and there. “or do you want me to keep going?”

you sobbed, “i do.”

part of you thought that was all of the permission he needed to jump your bones, but he didn’t. he remained in his place, before he asked you another question.

“tell me what you’re worried about before we do that,” he ordered softly.

the command made your knees buckle, but you stayed standing as you sucked in sharp breaths of air. you wiped at your tears, trying to hold onto whatever sense you still possessed. “i don’t want to mess up our friendship — and i don’t even know if you would want this if i wasn’t like this —“

“baby, i’ve wanted you for a long time,” he answered lowly. his eyes were dark as he folded his lip into his mouth, licking the skin. “we can talk about it after, i promise, but right now… sweetheart, let me take care of you.”

something broke within you, and your knees buckled. “oh, peter…”

peter’s quick reflexes caused him to catch you before you fell, and he immediately pulled you up. you felt like you were floating then, finally in the arms of an alpha that seemed trustworthy. you felt his strong hand gently press against the base of your skull, and nudge you slightly into the crook of his neck. immediately, his scent hit you.

it felt like you were provided the sustenance you needed to at least be present in the moment once more. your heat had almost caused you to pass out, but being able to smell and lick at peter’s scent glands woke you up enough so that you were able to be aware of your surroundings and give into the carnal urge of taking the pleasure offered. peter held you upright and let out soft moans as you scented him, rubbing your back as you continued.

“fuck, you smell — that feels so good,” he rasped, his voice lowering. “so sweet.”

suddenly, peter’s fingers on the back of your neck tightened around your strands of hair and lifted your head back slightly. you broke from his skin with a gasp, saddened to have been taking away from the comfort you were provided, but then… it was peter’s turn.

he lowered his head to your scent glands and began sucking on the skin. you threw your head back into his hand and moaned into the open air above your head. you couldn’t see peter in your peripheral, but you knew his eyes were closed with a firm crease between his brow as his lips formed the perfect position to suck at your sweet and supple skin. the pressure was hard, and it hurt, but it was so fucking welcome. the electric shocks of pain were gone, and now were replaced with mind-numbing lust that made you selfish. you knew he would want some time scenting you as well, but you couldn’t let him. you needed him now.

“please, peter,” you whined. “i need you now, please…”

he chuckled against your skin, and pressed his flat tongue on the base of your neck and dragged it all the way up to your jaw. you gasped at the sensation before he planted a wet kiss by your ear. “you’re going to tell the alpha what to do, sweetheart, that it?”

you almost would’ve giggled and been playful back if you weren’t so consumed with desire. “i’m begging you, peter — please do something. it hurts so bad.”

“oh, you needy little thing…” he cooed before a heavy, large hand slipped its way into your shorts. “in these tiny little shorts…”

when peter finally slipped in fingers along your folds, you jumped in his hold. he chuckled darkly against your earlobe, which immediately melted you against him. you were putty to him then — a lust-numb omega who would do anything for him to make her feel good.

“so wet for me,” he rasped. “i was so mad at you when you told me you didn’t call someone — didn’t call me —“

“i’m sorry…” you whined. “please don’t stop…”

“oh, sweetheart, you feel so good i don’t think i could,” he spoke lowly. “you were so wrong not to call, but a pretty and needy thing like you doesn’t to deserve to be in pain like this, does she?”

you shook your head pathetically, tears coming to your eyes. “no, peter — please take the pain away.”

“i know, baby, i know…” he rasped once more as the pads of his middle and ring finger flattened against your bud, drawing rough circles. “you going to be good for me, now? tell me what you need?”

you pushed against his hand that held your head upright as the pleasure of his movements filled your womb with an intense feeling of warmth. you began to tremble in his arms, letting out small, pleased sighs… but you had ignored his question, and peter didn’t like that.

he slipped his hand away from your clit, and began to stroke the outside, drenched lips of your core.

“peter…” you begged in frustration, turning your head to look at him. you had never seen his eyes so fucking dark and focused — and full of desire. “peter — you promised.”

he laughed darkly. “i’ll keep my promise, if you promise to be good for me.”

“i’ll be so good for you,” you practically whined, eyes going wide and lips parting. “i promise i’ll be good for you, peter… i promise i won’t upset you again.”

“good fucking girl.”

immediately, he shoved his two fingers inside your entrance and pressed his thumb against your clit. before you could react, his mouth was on yours and stifled the moans that left your pretty lips. he shoved his tongue in your mouth, and the feeling of being so full made you whine in pleasure passed his lips. he swallowed your moans whole as he dragged the soda of his fingers in rough circles around your bud.

“oh, alpha…” you cried into him. “i needed this so badly. please keep going, please…”

“still don’t trust me?” he chuckled, slipping in his tongue to tangle with you. “trust your alpha, baby, i got you.”

...and trust you did.

peter immediately let go of you so he could lift you up by the back of your thighs. the pads of his finger dig deliciously into your flesh and the warmth of his body pressed so tightly against yours provided you so much comfort. you began to suck at his neck as he had done to yours, and a deep rumble sounded within his rib cage.

he was fast as he went for your bed, laying you down on the edge. you went to raise yourself and reach for him, but he wouldn’t allow it. with a smirk, he ordered you back down on the bed. begrudgingly, you pouted and laid back down.

peter took his time taking off his clothes, layer by layer, as he gazed down at you. a small circle of slick was collected by your shorts, embarrassment rising to your cheeks. you bit your lip as you gazed at his bare upper body. for a nerd, peter’s thick muscles were some of the most mouth-watering things you had ever seen. his shoulders, his traps, his biceps, his forearms — he was killing you as you stared at him, not allowing you to touch him.

maintaining eye contact, he fell to his knees on the floor. he was face to face with your clothed cunt and open thighs, but his eyes were on you. only you.

“don’t take your eyes off me, sweetheart,” he ordered. “do that for me?”

you nodded meekly.

he spread your folds so that nothing was standing in the way of him and your clit. almost immediately, his thick, wet tongue was working at where you were most sensitive. it was growing harder and harder to keep your eyes open and not throw your head back, lost in pleasure, but you kept your promise to him. you had folded your lips underneath each other to keep yourself upright and tamed, but you did what he asked.

what got you the most, though… was the fact that peter parker looked lost in a dream-like state as he ate you out. his eyes drifted closed and there was no crease in his forehead as tongue made the sweetest movements against your clit. one of his strong hands held one of your thighs in place, preventing you from moving either, when his other hand lifted up. he slid two fingers easily into you, and immediately started curling them and pressing them upwards into the wall inside you.

“oh my —“ your voice cracked as your eyes threatened to close. “god — christ — peter —“

you were barely making sense at this point. your hips were trying to roll against peter, but he held you down and in place. eventually, he pressed a flat hand against your lower abdomen and you thought you saw fucking stars. immediately… you threw your head back against the bed in defeat, writhing and on the verge of crying.

“hey,” he immediately snapped, taking his tongue off of you and rising so he was bent over you. “what did i say?”

with a whimper, you raised yourself to your elbows and looked at him shamefully. “to keep my eyes on you.”

his movements were halted, but his hand on your stomach felt so good as his fingers inside of you were still pressed against your upper wall and frozen in place. “was goin’ to be nice, but now i don’t think i am.”

he gave you a wet and sloppy kiss, but almost immediately withdrew as he kept his face inches from yours. you reached for his neck, holding the back of his head like he had held yours by the front door.

“please,” you whimpered. “i’m sorry… when you put your fingers inside me, and pressed down on my stomach… it just felt so good. please, don’t stop —“

you were on the verge of sobbing as he dangled what you wanted in front of your face. a smirk crept up onto his face, and you knew you were in for it. “felt too good for you, baby, that it?”

“i didn’t want it to stop,” you whimpered again, bucking your hips against his hand. “peter…”

“since you didn’t want to listen,” he began, slowly moving his fingers inside you once more. hummed in enjoyment, but kept your gaze on his face. “you only get my fingers for now. eye contact, or i take them away and leave. got it?”

“yes, yes.” you nodded frantically, twisting the ends of his hair in your fingers. “please, i’ll listen now.”

that was until his fingers started moving faster and harder.

his lips were mere inches from yours, but you were scared that if you kissed him that would obstruct your line of sight from his. you kept your distance, even though it was three inches, and tried your best to listen to him as peter absolutely wrecked the inside of you.

the sounds that left your lips were so fucking pathetic that it brought a deep blush to the tips of your cheeks. your womb felt like it was coming to life as peter worked and worked your sweetest and deepest parts, while pressing down on your stomach which only heightened the sensations.

“it feels so good…” you whined, tears feeling like they were going to spring from your eyes. “feels so good i could cry.”

“take it for me, baby,” he hoarsely said, eyes the darkest you had ever seen them. “show your alpha what a good girl you can be.”

he slipped a third finger in, and you were fucking gone.

he stretched you painfully and perfectly that you couldn’t stop the tear or two that leaked from your eye. your throat went hoarse with the pleasured gasps and sounds you were making, but your eyes never left peter’s unless it was to blink away the tears.

“that good, baby?” he taunted with a smirk. “making you feel that good?”

you hummed in approval, nodding pathetically. sobs left your lips as your nerve endings felt like they were shooting lightning. peter was fucking you with his hand like his life depended on it — like your life depended on it. your hips were struggling to writhe under the weight of his palm and all you could do was tell the man before you how good he was making you feel. his smirk and the lust in his eyes grew before his thumb began to draw circles on your clit.

you saw white.

you couldn’t help it — you had to close your eyes. nothing could stop them from slamming shut as your orgasm overtook your mind, body, senses, fucking everything as it flooded through your veins, warming every part of your being. it was warm, it was comforting, and it was fucking everything to you in that moment. you pressed your forehead against peter’s and just fucking sobbed.

“that’s it, baby,” he cooed. “that’s it.”

you whined in approval at his words and how his movements did not stop as you rode out your orgasm.

“such a good girl, taking everything i give you…” he pressed a wet kiss to the side of your face. “i know, sweetheart, i know… just keep cumming for me.”

you were shaking as you rode out their last wave of your orgasm before you smashed your lips to peter’s. it was sloppy, the way your tongues tangled with each other. his fingers still played gently inside of you as you shivered, moving away from his hands.

“you sensitive, baby?” he laughed. “can’t take it?”

your teeth sank into your lip as you shook your head. “need your cock, peter. please.”

he immediately straightened and stood up. you were sat on the bed, arms fully locked and extended behind you, with your knees bent and feet planted on either side of the bed. your pussy was drenched with your own juices, leaking down into the once perfectly clean sheets. your cheeks blushed as you gazed up at the man before you through your thick lashes.

“greedy girl,” he stated lowly, returning your gaze. you watched his long fingers unlatch his belt before you helped him pull his pants and boxers down. “your hips were fighting me so badly, baby. what? you wanna get on top?”

part of you was taken by surprise. it was common among omegas and alphas to fuck in missionary or from behind, and you were expecting that. however, part of you grew excited at the thought of having control and being able to take whatever you wanted. you smirked up at the man.

“can i?” you asked innocently. “want to feel you as deep as possible.”

he chuckled darkly before he laid back against your headboard. it was mesmerizing to see peter parker, the most accomplished man on this planet, smirk at you with such confidence. you wasted no time in swinging a leg over his hips and rushed to have him inside you.

you positioned him at your entrance, and immediately sank downwards.

if you had gone slower, the pain may have dissipated, but you needed that stretch as you lowered yourself. there was something to fucking erotic about the man below you being so big that even after being fucked by his three fingers, drenching you, you still craved that bittersweet sensation of being too small for him.

and he felt it, too.

“pussy still so tight for me,” he rasped. “you’re too good for me, aren’t you?”

you giggled at him before you began to roll your hips against him. the tip of his cock was pressed against a spot inside you that you could never dream of reaching, and it was something electrifying. it sent shivers up and down your spine, and all you could think about was how much you loved him buried inside of you.

suddenly, he sent a small slap on your ass. you gasped, and began to move faster and rougher against him.

“that’s it, sweetheart,” he grunted, hands now resting on your waist as he rolled your lower body with his. he pumped his hips upwards to meet yours, and those small whimpers began to leave your lips once again. “that’s more like it, baby. i know what that pussy needs.”

this entire time, peter had been focused on what your heat-dazed mind and body needed… and you couldn’t have cared less about what he needed. you didn’t even listen to him before, for chrissakes… you needed to be better — and you knew just the thing.

you planted one hand in front of you on his pelvis, and reached the other behind you to cup his balls. they were heavy in your hand, and your core tightened at the sensation. he let out one of the loudest and surprised moans you had ever heard in your life. it was music to your ears, and sent sparks right to your pussy. you clenched around him as he threw his head back, closing his eyes and scrunching his brow together as his lips parted in ecstasy. you rolled your hand and your hips at the same time and threw your head back. moans and whines were leaving your lips like no one could hear you, like there was no one in the world besides you and peter.

suddenly, peter pulled you towards him so you were practically pressed front to front. you continued to smash your hips with his and roll his balls in your hand as your next orgasm quickly approached. his face was at level with your breasts, which he greedily accepted the view of. he brought one hand up to roll one of your nipples between his fingers, while he roughly sucked on the other. your senses went crazy then, and all you knew was to drive your hips up and down and front and back to ensure peter’s cock never left your pussy.

“your cock’s so big, alpha,” you whined. “makes me feel so good…”

“being such a good girl for me,” he groaned against your chest, breath hot on your skin. “your alpha’s so proud of you.”

“oh, fuck, fuck, fuck —“ it was all growing too much, the pleasure. your head felt like you were swimming, and your hips were growing sloppy.

peter noticed immediately, smiling menacingly. “you got too greedy, hmm?” he threw you off of him, back flat on the bed, and you gasped in surprise. “need you to take my knot, baby. your pussy is just too good.”

he bent your thighs backwards, so your feet were in the air close to your head. immediately, he shoved his long and thick cock inside you. the head of his cock was red and angry, and you gasped as you watched it enter you and felt it press against your upper walls once more. peter planted two strong arms on either side of you as the veins in his arms made an appearance, looking more pronounced than ever. his hips were snapping against yours, and you lost all control at that moment.

“finish inside me, alpha,” you begged. “need your knot so badly.”

"oh, fuck —"

immediately, peter wrapped your hair around his fist and pulled you taut to him. you were clinging onto him for dear life — the very sustenance that he promised to give you and was giving to you tenfold. whiny, pathetic breaths and gasps were shoving past your lips and were music to peter's ears. he could practically hear, feel, taste, see, fucking sense your orgasm creeping up on you, holding you hostage. he needed to make you finish, he had to. he had to because you were in need, sure — but on some level, on some animalistic, carnal level — he needed to see you in a state of pure bliss for his own selfish need.

and he knew just what you needed.

peter immediately attached his lips to your scent glands on your neck and sucked as hard as he could. his hips drove themselves against yours, and he himself fell victim to the fall of immense pleasure. it blindfolded him and shoved him straightforward, backwards, sideways — he didn't know... he couldn't tell. all peter knew was that when he came as hard as he did, he felt his knot growing and latching itself inside you... and that's when he knew.

your tight, sopping wet pussy clenched around his knot and you came with a scream. every ounce of pain you had felt over the course of the day had left you. you were a stranger to it, any kind of pain. the only thing you knew was peter and his warm skin that felt so good against yours. your hips thrashed against his, unable to deal with the pleasure, but his strength held you down so you could not shy away from the immense relief you were so grateful for.

"good girl..." he growled. "such a good fucking girl..."

everything went black... but you knew you were safe. you were always safe with your best friend. 

---

the end. hehe

-L xo

[bakugoushotwife]

kinktober day two: blindfold kink

>>> day two has arrived! i hope everyone loved our debut piece with nanami yesterday! so i thought this section could be me explaining why i chose the character for the piece, but i feel like today is self-explanatory.

>>> starring: satoru gojo x curvy!fem!reader >>>cw: blindfolding duh, pervy and obsessive gojo, oral (fem receiving), pet names, begging, doggy. pining, friends to fuckers hehe >>>wc: 2.8k >>>event masterlist

it may have started out as an innocent act–something playful and charming. but unfortunately, satoru could never tolerate such innocence. not without wanting to bend it to his will, anyway, and you and your frisky antics were no exception. he’s been wanting to taint your virtue and unyielding reputation for years at this point. you’re the picture of righteousness, kind and forgiving, and oh so malleable. gojo knows you’ve been this way for years, since school, just angelic by nature. it gets on his nerves. 

you banter with him, though, and he enjoys the little bit of wit you show, a sly mind cloaked behind a doll-like face, porcelain and made up to mask the little devil lurking beneath. he sees the real you, the cheeky teenager who accidentally flashed him your panties every time he complimented your hair, the cunning sorceress that uses her air of innocence and ethereal looks to manipulate your way through this wretched society. you impress him, you intrigue and confuse him. maybe he’s just another man under your spell, maybe this was your way of manipulating him, but he can’t help but think that you’ve remained close to him–or more so, kept him close to you, because he means more than anyone else. perhaps that’s just gojo’s ego acting up again, but most people agree that your continual spotlight on him had something more to it than simple friendship. 

you hinted and toyed at crossing that line all the time, letting him hold your hand and buy you lunch and other gifts satoru deemed worthy of your ownership. he was powerless, simply praying for the day that you would finally release him from your spell or let him demolish this front you keep shielding the real you. 

today was that day, when you stopped by his place to check on him after a mission. you frequent his home often enough that it’s no big deal, and you knew with his ability, he was unscathed as always. but still, it gave you a reason to go over. you were shocked that he hadn’t cornered you yet, pouncing on you in the confines and comfort of his own home. you enjoyed toying with him, giving him all the signs that you were interested and then feigning shock when he was overly forward. you could tell you were confusing him, and seeing the smartest and strongest and most arrogant man alive confounded by your mind games was intoxicating. but even you were getting tired of this song and dance, growing sick of only teasing. satoru was the most desirable man ever made, in your mind, and you were ready to push him so far that he couldn’t possibly keep his chivalrous and cordial facade up any longer. you knew the real him too, of course. the pervert lurking beneath the surface of the respectable sensei—the hungry eyes hidden behind the black fabric leashing that side of him to avoid detection. 

the two of you were alone now, however, where the masks could come off. so when you lean up from your position on the couch a courteous distance away, folding your knees under yourself to reach for his blindfold, he lets it happen. you hear his infinity deactivate, allowing your graceful fingers to tug the black fabric loose with a giggle. 

“you can really see through this with those six-eyes of yours, hm?” you hum with intrigue, dangling the eye protection from your thumb and forefinger. he smirks a bit, leaned against the arm of the couch, facing you now with his distracting gaze revealed to you. since his power wasn’t active, his eyes were a deep ocean of mysterious thoughts and emotions, swirling you around and dragging you to the dark bottom. you were lost at sea, his glossy lips pulled back in a grin. he knows you’re staring, and so do you, but he takes the opportunity to stare at you, your eyes just as bewildering to him. 

he juts his chin to the blindfold, and reaches for it unceremoniously. you made it easier by sitting like that on the cushion next to him, really. he chuckles, and grabs your chin with a commanding yet gentle cup of his hand, fingers splayed across your jaw. 

“sure can, lets me save some energy. i wanna see what you can see through it, yeah?” his smile is predatory, and you’re sure even total blindness would allow you to see that, but you had practically hand-crafted his feral need, succeeding in your mission to push him over the edge. he notices the way the corners of your lips twitch up in anticipation, and it only makes his grin stretch dimples in his cheeks. you nod, and his hands move quickly. 

he secures the fabric around your head, and all you can see is pitch black. you reach up to feel the soft cloth, noting the scent of satoru’s lavender and cedarwood shampoo. you hear him chuckle fondly, and then you feel the cushions dip and shift, the presence of satoru gojo’s frame looming large above you, even on your knees. his breath fans across your face, and you can tell he’s still looking at you like a wolf eyes an unsuspecting deer. except he knows you’re no frail doe—no you’re a fellow wolf, playing amongst the rest of them. he can tell by your outfit that you’ve thrown in the towel, surrendering to his advances and finally letting him warp that shallow image of girlish innocence you show everyone else. a skimpy little dress, the fabric no thicker than the one wrapped around your face and definitely not enough to conceal your hardened nipples. he wonders where to start with you—admiring your anxious squirms of anticipation, the way your head is cocked up towards his, awaiting his touch. 

he has half the mind to toy with you the way you’ve played with him over the years, but try as he might, he knows you hold all the power. you always have, and this is his only chance to prove that he deserves a promotion. you feel his cool fingers scrape against the skin of your shoulders, sliding the straps of your dress to dangle across your biceps. he hums pleasantly, tugging the front down. you hiss at the brisk air rushing across your chest, feeling your nipples tighten almost painfully so. you can hear the smile in his voice as his hands cup your tits, everything feeling so much more intense with one of your senses taken away from you. 

“oh how sad it makes me to know you’ve kept these locked up this long…” he sighs, squeezing the mounds in his hands. he enjoys the way they fill his palms, jiggling so prettily he rewards you by brushing his calloused thumbs over your pebbled buds. he earns a whine from you in response, making him grin devilishly. he figured you were sensitive, even the slightest of touches resulted in the needy jolts of your body. it made his cock jump in his pants, painfully pressing against the zipper. he stares at you, groaning aloud just from the sight of your perky boobs. he doesn’t know if he can make it through this, countless loads have been blown in your honor over the years—he has millions of fantasies and no clue how to keep from cumming in his pants. he leans over, caressing his large hands down your sides as his mouth sucks a taut nipple into his warm mouth. his eyes momentarily flutter shut at the sweet gasp you give him, your hands feebly feeling around for something to hold onto. he guides your hands to his hair, humming against your chest to encourage you in pulling it.

you didn’t need to be told twice, tugging at the silky locks and arching your way deeper in his mouth. he chuckles at you, grazing your cute sensitive skin and letting his hands fall even further. you nod your approval at his new grip, his hands spanning the entire width of your ass. he loves the way the fat feels in his hold, and the way you desperately push yourself forward for more of him has him releasing your tit in favor of sucking a deep bruise in the skin, dick aching at the lewd squeals you make at the feeling of his teeth sinking into your flesh. you slide your hands down his back, huffing your displeasure at feeling his shirt under your fingertips. he chuckles at your neediness, releasing you to take his shirt off. you hear it fall to the floor, and then you feel a weight—satoru’s weight— shift off the couch. his chuckle seems far away, and you realize he’s walking away.

“i figure we’ll need more space, no? i can’t fuck you over the couch like i want, ‘s too low. follow me.” he smirks, leaning against the door of his bedroom down the hallway. even from here, he could see your features screw up in displeasure, and he doesn’t repress the laugh that follows. he knows if he could see those captivating eyes of yours, they’d be ripping him apart. he shoved the coffee table out of your way, making sure you had a straight shot to him, for whatever points that earns him. “just follow the sound of my voice.” he sings. 

you huff your frustration, but push yourself off the couch. your dress falls to your waist, the shelf of your curves keeping it from dropping completely. he smirks at the way you swing your hips, stomping towards him with the clear confidence that he wouldn’t allow you to hurt yourself. you’re stopped by the brick wall that is satoru, and he takes your hands. “good girl. do you trust me?”

it was a little late for that, but you nod. he squeezes your hands, dropping them to pull your dress over your hips and into the floor with a woosh. “fuck, you are so beautiful,” he groans, running his hands over the dips of your body, stare locked on your leaking pussy. he smiles at this, he had hardly touched you. “dripping already, baby?” he teases, dropping to his knees to taste you. he just couldn’t help himself, not with your dopey unsuspecting grin and your arousal for him so obviously running down your thighs.

 he could do anything he wanted to you, and you’d have no choice but to allow it. you’re lucky he worships you, or he’d leave you in the room by yourself, only coming in to use you as a cocksleeve and leave again, rendering you a sloppy cum-filled mess. maybe another time, you do look sexy in the blindfold after all. 

“of course, sato. been waiting for you to make a move for years.” you giggle softly, teasing him still. you know you’ve dangled the promised fruit and taken it away before he had the chance to take a bite. so he does that now, grabbing the thick sides of your thighs to pull them apart. he scrapes his teeth against your plush skin, groaning at the scent of your sopping pussy so close. you gasp softly, back colliding against the wood paneling of his door. he doesn’t give you time to adjust, sliding his tongue through your cute lower lips, sighing contently at the taste of you. he knew he wouldn’t be able to control himself past this, never again would he be able to play the perfect gentleman. you stabilize yourself with a grip on his shoulders, the room filled with slurps and moans from a man receiving his own type of pleasure from giving you yours. he grips himself over his pants, willing himself to be strong enough to wait for your sweet cunt. he licks and nibbles on the sensitive bundle hidden by your hood, relishing in how easy it is to make your legs shake around his face. he moans happily, wanting you to know how much he enjoys feasting on your box. you’re clawing at his freckled shoulders, unable to resist mewling and panting, grinding your hips down on his nose as his tongue slips in your hole. it’s the perfect storm, making your legs feel so wobbly you trust only his grip on your dimpled thighs to hold you upright. 

“oh wow–gon’ cum soon, sato, can i?” you whimper, hands cupping your chest to try to replicate the sensation his mouth gave you there. he hums his approval, squeezing your thighs so tightly he knows there will be gojo sized handprints there tomorrow. your moan is so sweet when you release on his face, he has to fight cumming in his jeans again. it’s so like him to not give you any recovery time, picking you up over his shoulder and carrying you to the bed. 

“apologies for the roughness, sweetheart. just fighting a losing battle here, you have no idea what you do to me.” he growls, laying you over the mattress and turning you to your stomach. he was throwing you around like a ragdoll, dragging you to all fours before you hear the sound of his belt unbuckling. you’re shaking with anticipation, arching your back to make it as easy as possible. your cunt is glistening, making him drool with excitement as he steps out of his pants. his length is pressing through your folds, sliding through your wetness to bump his tip against your clit. you cry out your impatience, to which he chuckles his amusement. “need something, gorgeous?” he pouts on your behalf. 

you nod eagerly, reduced to begging as your eyes sting with tears. his cock sliding against you told you he was huge, like you suspected, the strokes of lightning coursing through your body just from his tip nudging your clit was borderline pathetic, you needed more before you lost your mind, already feeling the torture of not being able to see him take you for the first time. “please, fuck, satoru—i need you so bad im gonna start cryin’ soon! pleasepleaseplease–” 

he shoves in with a mischievous giggle, another bruising handle made of your hips. your messy cunt sucked him in greedily, satin walls hugging him so tight his mouth dropped open. “fuck, angel, you feel so good—better ‘n i imagined.” he sighs out, his hips flush against the fat of your ass—filling you to the brim. you’re on your tiptoes as he starts to slam into you flat footed, nothing but his own force plowing into your cunt, his curved cock bumping against your womb with every slap of his balls. 

you’re a lost cause, your brain scrambled as your fist the covers below you. you wish you could respond with something more than wails of pleasure, but you can’t gather any thoughts to speak of. all you could feel was his dick rearranging your guts, his hands searing their brand on your body. he loves the way you crumble, unable to see and now speak. it makes his cock jump against your spongy need. he knew he couldn’t last much longer, especially at this punishing pace, but it was worth it to see you rendered dumb on his bed, spread wide with your ass rippling on his shaft. it was glorious, the pride he felt in claiming you as his spread warmth through his body, and his release was near. 

“gonna make me cum, princess. gonna let me cum in you? make you mine for good, yeah?” he purrs, his hands reaching up to fist your hair so he could get some sort of response from you. he pulls you into a prettier arch, your pliable body too jelly to hold the position yourself. “hm? answer please.” 

you do your best to nod, making some strangled sound of approval. you clench down around him, keeping him trapped in you anyway. it sends him reeling, with a high-pitched grunt he paints your walls with his seed, letting himself cover your body with his. he kisses your shoulder blade, the two of you in sync as you heave for breath. you’re smiling softly, and he pulls the blindfold off you to reveal his beaming and sweaty form looking down on you with such fondness your heart and pussy throb. he leans up to give you a proper kiss now, looking absolutely heaven-sent. some of the longer pieces of his hair stuck to his forehead and cheekbones and his lower lip was swollen and red, where he had no doubt been gnawing at it. you kiss him hungrily, and you feel him harden within you again. 

“you did so good, baby girl.” he says once he pulls away, grinning at the softness of your kisses. he wanted to spoil you too, praise your body for the pleasure you bring him—now that you’ve finally let yourself be his. “now that was fucking…let me make love to you this time.” he coos, making you both giggle as he turns you to your back for yet another demonstration of his undying love–and insatiable desire.

[crowwritesaway]

Jealous Patrick Bateman x Female Reader Pt. 2

“Are you having fun?” One of your coworkers asked Patrick. Patrick scoffed. Is this what they call fun?

“My drink is almost done?” She complained in hopes he would buy her a drink. Patrick hummed, not showing any interest. “Where did you meet Y/N?” Patrick sighed, his eyes didn’t move from where you were sitting. “We went to school together.”

“Aww. Childhood friends. That’s so sweet.” She faked a smile. Patrick rolled his eyes. “Tell me. Has she always been like this?” Patrick glanced at her for a second before turning back to you. “Like what?” And people call me insane? Is she insulting my Y/N? She giggled, slapping him playfully on his shoulder. Patrick grimaced. Only Y/N can touch me.

“She’s quiet. Too quiet. It’s like she’s not all there.” Patrick scoffed. She just like them. Them as in the people who hurt you. You glanced over at Patrick. His posture looked confrontational. You sensed he was irritated. “Is this how you treat everyone or is my Y/N special?” He mockingly smiled at her. You excused yourself from your coworker and made your way to his side.

“I’m serious. She’s weird. It was a pity invite.” Patrick glared at her. Why is she still talking? Can see not see my face? He glanced around the club. Oh, she’s lucky it’s a busy night. “Y/N, she’s perfect the way she is. Maybe you’re too loud. I mean, tell me. Do you ever shut up? Or you just say whatever because between you and me, being normal is overrated.” Patrick grinned at her. He could see the uncertainty in her eyes. She thought she could sway him to push aside Y/N.

She laughed. “Is everything okay?” You asked, standing in front of them. Patrick looked over at you with a soft expression. “I missed you.” He scooted out the booth seat. He hugged you. You hugged him back. “Did she upset you?” You asked, narrowing your eyes. He wasn’t the only protective person in the friendship. It went both ways.

“My ears. She talked them off.” He pulled away. “You’re here now. That’s all that matters to me.” You pursued your lips. You looked at your coworker. She looked away. You frowned. She probably thought badmouthing me would get her into his arms. Pathetic.

Patrick furrowed his eyebrows. “Look at me. Don’t strain your eyes by looking at that lovely coworker of yours.” He grinned. She was anything but lovely. Lovely my ass. “Let’s go somewhere else.”

“The company. The music. Everything sucks here.” Patrick complained, looking into your eyes. You nodded. It was boring. You thought interacting with them would be exciting and inviting but it wasn’t. It felt like they used you to bring Patrick. “I couldn’t agree more.”

“Come.” You went to say something. “They don’t deserve to hear anything from you.” Patrick cling to you. “Alright. Let’s go.” Patrick led you through the crowd. Your coworkers watched you leave. Their eyes filled with hate and envy.

You exited the club. The limo was there. Driver outside has opened the door. “Patrick.” You scolded. He shrugged his shoulders. “You never know.” He was prepared to drag you away from anyone. They were deserving nor worthy of your attention. Only him.

Now siting in the limo. “You should just quit.” You sighed. “Think about it. You could sleep in. You wouldn’t worry about the next project. Reading until god knows what hour at night. You could do whatever you want.” Patrick place his hand on your cheek. You both stared at each other. “Tempting.” Patrick glanced at your lips. “Don’t I know it.” He moved his hand down to your love handle. “I’ll take care of everything. It’ll be freeing.” For both you and I.

“Mmm. You make it sound so good.” Patrick licked his bottom lip. “Imagine if I did more.”

You flushed. “Alright. I’ll try this out.” Patrick smiled in victory. “That’s great. I look forward to seeing your messy hair.” He said, mischievously. “Fuck off.” Patrick gripped tighten on your waist. “No. It’s fuck me.” Your eyes flickered at his lips. Nope. He’s my bestfriend. “In your dreams.”

Patrick moved his hand away. “Yeah, I loved every second of it.” Your eyes went wide. “How much did you drink?” He was such a flirt. “Not much. You know how much I hate drinking when we’re out.” He needed to stay sharp to keep you safe.

“Of course. Part of this job change is them, right?” You asked, staring at the streets. You both faring forward. Patrick nodded. “Part of the reason.” You bit the inside of your cheek. “What..” Patrick interrupted you. “It’s not worth knowing. I’ll take care of it.”

He laid his hand over yours. “All that matters is your happiness. My best interest is yours. Your happiness is my happiness.” It’s us versus everyone else. No one else. Just us.

Stay around for more of Jealous Patrick Bateman x Female Reader

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