#and you may think “how are you even eating that much bread??” and the answer is i live with 5 other people

[fishy-lava]

Once you get this, you have to say five things you like about yourself, publicly. Then you send this to ten of your favourite followers (positivity is cool!!)🌈🌈

hello again!

uhhhhhhh

1. I guess I'm a decent singer and I learn song lyrics really fast (sometimes against my will lmao) so that's fun

2. I don't usually know what to say but I'm a good listener? even if I'm kinda awkward about it

3. honestly I'm pretty good at improv/sticking to the bit which is fun especially since my younger brother and I launch each other into ridiculous bits pretty much daily just bc

4. im good at baking! always fun to have little treats (I've made so much zucchini bread this week (and a chocolate zucchini cake) it's getting a little ridiculous but we have a lot of zucchini to get through before it goes bad)

5. I'm a fast learner and can pick up pretty much anything as long as I get to watch someone else do it first which is quite handy

this is an oddly difficult task for someone who just sorta ...exists and and frequently forgets that lmao

[staff]

We Asked an Expert...in Herpetology!

People on Tumblr come from all walks of life and all areas of expertise to grace our dashboards with paragraphs and photographs of the things they want to share with the world. Whether it's an artist uploading their speed art, a fanfic writer posting their WIPs, a language expert expounding on the origin of a specific word, or a historian ready to lay down the secrets of Ea-nasir, the hallways of Tumblr are filled with specialists sharing their knowledge with the world. We Asked an Expert is a deep dive into those expert brains on tumblr dot com. Today, we’re talking to Dr. Mark D. Scherz (@markscherz), an expert in Herpetology. Read on for some ribbeting frog facts, including what kind of frog the viral frog bread may be based on.

Reptiles v Amphibians. You have to choose one.

In a battle for my heart, I think amphibians beat out the reptiles. There is just something incredibly good about beholding a nice plump frog.

In a battle to the death, I have to give it to the reptiles—the number of reptiles that eat amphibians far, far outstrips the number of amphibians that eat reptiles.

In terms of ecological importance, I would give it to the amphibians again, though. Okay, reptiles may keep some insects and rodents in check, but many amphibians live a dual life, starting as herbivores and graduating to carnivory after metamorphosis, and as adults they are critical for keeping mosquitos and other pest insects in check.

What is the most recent exciting fact you discovered about herps?

This doesn’t really answer your question, but did you know that tadpole arms usually develop inside the body and later burst through the body wall fully formed? I learned about this as a Master’s student many years ago, but it still blows my mind. What’s curious is that this apparently does not happen in some of the species of frogs that don’t have tadpoles—oh yeah, like a third of all frogs or something don’t have free-living tadpoles; crazy, right? They just develop forelimbs on the outside of the body like all other four-legged beasties. But this has only really been examined in a couple species, so there is just so much we don’t know about development, especially in direct-developing frogs. Like, how the hell does it just… swap from chest-burster to ‘normal’ limb development? Is that the recovery of the ancestral programming, or is it newly generated? When in frog evolution did the chest-burster mode even evolve?

How can people contribute to conservation efforts for their local herps?

You can get involved with your local herpetological societies if they exist—and they probably do, as herpetologists are everywhere. You can upload observations of animals to iNaturalist, where you can get them identified while also contributing to datasets on species distribution and annual activity used by research scientists.

You can see if there are local conservation organizations that are doing any work locally, and if you find they are not, then you can get involved to try to get them started. For example, if you notice areas of particularly frequent roadkill, talking to your local council or national or local conservation organizations can get things like rescue programs or road protectors set up. You should also make sure you travel carefully and responsibly. Carefully wash and disinfect your hiking boots, especially between locations, as you do not want to be carrying chytrid or other nasty infectious diseases across the world, where they can cause population collapses and extinctions.

Here are some recent headlines. Quick question, what the frog is going on in the frog world? 

Click through for Mark’s response to these absolutely wild headlines, more about his day-to-day job, his opinion on frog bread, and his favorite Tumblr.

✨D I S C O V E R Y✨

There are more people on Earth than ever before, with the most incredible technology that advances daily at their disposal, and they disperse that knowledge instantly. That means more eyes and ears observing, recording, and sharing than ever before. And so we are making big new discoveries all the time, and are able to document them and reach huge audiences with them.

That being said, these headlines also showcase how bad some media reporting has gotten. The frogs that scream actually scream mostly in the audible range—they just have harmonics that stretch up into ultrasound. So, we can hear them scream, we just can’t hear all of it. Because the harmonics are just multiples of the fundamental, they would anyway only add to the overall ‘quality’ of the sound, not anything different. The mushroom was sprouting from the flank of the frog, and scientists are not really worried about it because this is not how parasitic fungi work, and this is probably a very weird fluke. And finally, the Cuban tree frogs (Osteocephalus septentrionalis) are not really cannibals per se; they are just generalist predators who will just as happily eat a frog as they will a grasshopper, but the frogs they are eating are usually other species. People seem to forget that cannibalism is, by definition, within a species. The fact that they are generalist predators makes them a much bigger problem than if they were cannibals—a cannibal would actually kind of keep itself in check, which would be useful. The press just uses this to get people’s hackles up because Westerners are often equal parts disgusted and fascinated by cannibalism. 

What does an average day look like for the curator of herpetology at the Natural History Museum of Denmark?

No two days are the same, and that is one of the joys of the job. I could spend a whole day in meetings, where we might be discussing anything from which budget is going to pay for 1000 magnets to how we could attract big research funding, to what a label is going to say in our new museum exhibits (we are in the process of building a new museum). Equally, I might spend a day accompanying or facilitating a visitor dissecting a crocodile or photographing a hundred snakes. Or it might be divided into one-hour segments that cover a full spectrum: working with one of my students on a project, training volunteers in the collection, hunting down a lizard that someone wants to borrow from the museum, working on one of a dozen research projects of my own, writing funding proposals, or teaching classes. It is a job with a great deal of freedom, which really suits my work style and brain.

Oh yeah, and then every now and then, I get to go to the field and spend anywhere from a couple of weeks to several months tracking down reptiles and amphibians, usually in the rainforest. These are also work days—with work conditions you couldn’t sell to anyone: 18-hour work days, no weekends, no real rest, uncomfortable living conditions, sometimes dangerous locations or working conditions, field kitchen with limited options, and more leeches and other biting beasties than most health and welfare officers would tolerate—but the reward is the opportunity to make new discoveries and observations, collect critical data, and the privilege of getting to be in some of the most beautiful and biodiverse places left on the planet. So, I am humbled by the fact that I have the privilege and opportunity to undertake such expeditions, and grateful for the incredible teams I collaborate with that make all of this work—from the museum to the field—possible.

The Tibetan Blackbird is also known as Turdus maximus. What’s your favorite chortle-inducing scientific name in the world of herpetology?

Among reptiles and amphibians, there aren’t actually that many to choose from, but I must give great credit to my friend Oliver Hawlitschek and his team, who named the snake Lycodryas cococola, which actually means ‘Coco dweller’ in Latin, referring to its occurrence in coconut trees. When we were naming Mini mum, Mini scule, and Mini ature, I was inspired by the incredible list that Mark Isaac has compiled of punning species names, particularly by the extinct parrot Vini vidivici, and the beetles Gelae baen, Gelae belae, Gelae donut, Gelae fish, and Gelae rol. I have known about these since high school, and it has always been my ambition to get a species on this list.

If you were a frog, what frog would you be and why?

I think I would be a Phasmahyla because they’re weird and awkward, long-limbed, and look like they’re wearing glasses. As a 186 cm (6’3) glasses-wearing human with no coordination, they quite resonate with me.

Please rate this frog bread from 1/10. Can you tell us what frog it represents?

With the arms inside the body cavity like that, it can basically only be a brevicipitid rain frog. The roundness of the body fits, too. I’d say probably Breviceps macrops (or should I say Breadviceps?) based on those big eyes. 7/10, a little on the bumpy side and missing a finger and at least one toe.

Please follow Dr. Mark Scherz at @markscherz for even more incredibly educational, entertaining, and meaningful resources in the world of reptiles and amphibians.

[explicit-tae]

WHAT THE HELL EVERYONE WAKE UP WE GOT AN UNGODLY HOUR UPDATE AND A BABY IS INVOLVEDJRIEKFKSKWKDJ I LOVE MY LIFE

this is like so old but why not use this to drop yet another part that i told myself i wasnt dropping

Ungodly Hour (9)

Jungkook forces you to face the reality that you are indeed pregnant - ew.

Warning: jungkook being jungkook, smut ofc, kissing, simp jungkook duh, protective jungkook, dirty talking, creampie, riding, unprotected sex,

“Y/N,” 

That voice. You dreaded hearing it now.

“I say this with the least bit of anger in me…but…what the fuck are you doing?”

Your eyes blink upwards from the soapy sink, the water running as you slowly drop the plate. Jungkook is staring right back at you with a look of pure disappointment. It’s as though you ruined his mood entirely. He had strolled through the door happily as ever with groceries he was going to prepare the two of you to eat and the smile on his lips disappeared in an instant.

“Washing the dishes.” you deadpan, turning off the water. You already know what Jungkook is going to say and you have to mentally prepare yourself for it.

“You can’t do things like this-”

“You can’t do things like this, Y/N, you’re pregnant.” you mock him with a roll of your eyes, an act that catches him by surprise.

“I’m serious.” Jungkook shakes his head and places the bags of groceries onto the island and rounds the corner to meet you. 

“Ever since we found out about this, you’ve gone insane.” you cross your arms with a tilt of your head. “I can’t wash dishes. I can’t walk alone-”

“For your safety, of course.” Jungkook shrugs his shoulders. “You’re the true crime watcher. You know what happens when girls walk alone.”

“Can we explain why I can’t wash dishes then?” you tilt your head.

“I may not have the answer, baby.” Jungkook places a hand on your chin and presses his lips to your forehead to peck them. “I’m sure 1,000 ways to die does.”

Jeon Jungkook was determined that this pregnancy was going to be handled with care. The amount of emotions he’s gone through alone at the realization of even the possibility that you were pregnant was overwhelming. Witnessing the positive pregnancy test and even getting to sit through doctor visits for added confirmation had filled him with emotion.

“I told you in the Jeon family that the woman has to relax.” Jungkook begins to take out the groceries he has bought. “You think my mother was straining her back when she was pregnant with me and my brother? Of course not.”

Jungkook then turns to look at you, eyes fixed. “Speaking of labor…did you quit your job yet?”

Not this again.

“We’ve been through this.” you wipe your hands on your shirt lazily and go towards the fridge. You would help him put the groceries away on a good day. However, Jungkook was adamant on you doing absolutely nothing that could harm you or the child you were barely pregnant with.

“We have.” Jungkook nods.  “And I want you to quit.”

“I don’t want to quit.” you don’t look at Jungkook and instead go towards a few slices of cheese to make yourself the perfect grilled cheese that you were now envisioning in your mind. 

“You always complain about how stressed you are working there.” Jungkook deadpans. “What if they have you stock?”

“Then I’ll stock.” you shrug, again focusing on the grilled cheese. You’re buttering the sliced bread when you speak again. “My mother didn’t raise a bitch.”

You then knit your brows and hum. In a way she did. Your bitchy attitude towards Jungkook had diminished when you realized that you, dare you say, love him. Especially now that you were very much pregnant by the same man you claimed you’d never give a chance to. How the universe humbles you is amazing.

“Y/N…” 

Jungkook takes a deep breath. He turns to face you fully, crossing his arms. You’re carefully placing the cheese onto the bread and he watches you place it into the air fryer. You turn to him with a displeased look.

“You don’t even like working there.”

True.

“I know.” you nod your head. “I have-”

“Don’t say you have bills.” Jungkook interrupts. “I pay all of your bills.”

Your eyes turn  to small slits for a moment.

“I’m saving money.” you shrug again. “For the baby.”

Jungkook’s gaze softens a bit, but he has to remain strong. If he gives into you now then you’d never quit.

“Why?” Jungkook questions. “We have enough money.”

“You,” you scoff. “have enough money.”

“I don’t know what that even means, Y/N.” Jungkook shakes his head. 

“I can’t have you pay for everything while I sit around and not do anything.”

Jungkook blinks a few times and his response shouldn’t surprise you. It’s Jungkook, after all. “Why not?” he questions slowly, genuinely confused. Probably because he already pays for everything now and he was completely fine with it.

Your hands begin to rub at your temples and slowly you begin to laugh. 

“How long are you planning on working there, anyways? Soon you’ll begin to show. School is already stressful enough, don’t you think?” Jungkook decides to take this time to put away the groceries so it doesn’t appear that he’s being too demanding of you and your wishes. “You can always…take a break from both. Just relax.”

The airfryer beeps and you thank the universe for giving you a bit of a distraction. You don’t want to think about school or work now and all you wanted to do was sink your teeth into this grilled cheese.

“We still have to tell our parents.”

Another situation you were holding back from, even if it has been three months since you initially found out. You had held off telling anyone in your family and - even now - it was awkward meeting Jungkook for the first time to reveal that you were pregnant. Besides, you weren’t that far along and you didn’t necessarily look pregnant. Chaeyoung thought you did but that was only because she knew and always insisted on touching your “bump” that you swore wasn’t there.

You take a big bite of the sandwich and swallow yourself in a silent self-pity party. 

“I know.” is all you say in response to Jungkook. 

As the last item is put away, Jungkook then drops yet another statement that shouldn’t surprise you. 

“I found somewhere bigger for us to move.”

You lick your lips, whipping your head to look at Jungkook. 

“Bigger?” you hum. “This place is already huge.”

“Not big enough for a baby.” Jungkook tilts his head. “They’ll need their own room eventually. It’ll grow into a child then a teenager and-”

“Please,” you close your eyes for a moment with a shake of your head. “you’re getting too far into the future.”

“Someone has to.” Jungkook retorts. “I’ve been looking in the area for us to upsize. I didn’t want to get anything without your approval.”

“You don’t need my approval.” you snicker. “Just get-”

“Stop doing that.” Jungkook’s tone changes to one that’s more serious. 

You take the last bite of your grilled cheese just as the mood changes. You knit your brows at the man. 

“You and the baby, Y/N,” Jungkook begins, taking a few steps closer to you. His hair had grown back out from the cut he initially did and it bounces with each step. “are my top priority. I want to take care of you. Your opinion still matters at the end of the day.”

There’s something in you that shifts and you blame the baby completely for fucking with your hormones. 

Jungkook is taken aback when your eyes begin to become glossy and you begin to cry right in front of him. For a moment he’s stunned, thinking that he has said something to you that caused you to cry. Then, he understands just how emotional you were (thanks to the fetus inside of you) when you crash yourself into his chest and begin to sob.

“This pregnancy is kicking your ass already.” Jungkook jokes, but his arm wraps you into a hug, one hand soothingly rubbing your back. 

“Fuck you.” you sniffle.

“I did and this is how we got here.” Jungkook jokes with a chuckle. “You’re crying now but…I think you’re going to hate me soon.”

“Why?” you murmur against his chest. 

There’s a quick knock on the door followed by it beginning to jingle. You slowly lift yourself from Jungkook’s chest, eyeing him suspiciously. 

“Remember that I love you.” Jungkook presses his lips to yours, pecking it. “And, I love our baby.”

“Jungkook…”

You can hear voices enter - unfamiliar ones. 

“I invited my parents over for lunch.” Jungkook says quickly. “Please don’t hate me, Y/N, my mother has been begging to meet you for months and-”

Your hands dig into his shirt, your eyes widening. Your sadness - caused by the great amount of love and adoration you felt at his words - appeared to diminish on the spot.

“You did what?!” you hiss, teeth gritting.

“Jungkook?”

That must’ve been Jungkook’s mother calling for him, followed by a pair of footsteps inching closer to where you two were. 

Fuck Jeon Jungkook. Now you were panicking - probably more than you needed to be. Jungkook told you stories of his parents and how excited his mother was to meet you. He claimed he spoke highly of you to her and you didn’t doubt him. Still, you looked a mess. You weren’t dressed to meet even your own parents right now. There’s a stain on your shirt and the pajama pants you wore were Jungkook’s iron man ones because they were comfy. 

Fuck Jeon Jungkook again.

“I hate you.” you murmur as Jungkook turns around just as his mother peaks her head through the kitchen to find her son.

“Ma!” Jungkook gushed, opening his arms to greet his mother with a hug that he met her half way to. 

“Your hair has gotten so long since the last time I saw you.” you hear his mother speak, her voice soft and motherly-like. “You never come around anymore.”

“I saw you a month ago.” Jungkook snorts. “I’ve been busy. Where is-”

“He’s stuck at meetings all day.” his mother adds, already knowing what her son was going to ask concerning his father. 

You stand awkwardly behind Jungkook, your nerves beating your ass mentally.

“Ma,” Jungkook slowly steps aside and turns around. “this is-”

“Y/N.” she finishes, coming a bit closer to you to wrap you in a hug. It stuns you for a moment and Jungkook offers a soft smile when she does. You proceed to hug her back, your irritation towards her son slowly dying down. “I thought I was never going to meet you.”

Jungkook exhales, holding in a breath he wasn’t aware of. “We’ve been busy-”

“That’s what he’s been saying.” his mother now speaks to you with a shake of her head. “You’re so cute.”

Your body burns with embarrassment at her compliment but you gently thank her. You look a mess, truly, and the more you remember this, the more you think about how you wanted to punch Jungkook in the gut. 

“I was just about to start lunch.” Jungkook claps his hands. “You and Y/N can relax while-”

“I can help.” you suggest.

“No.” Jungkook deadpans, his eyes widening a bit. He makes a gesture with his head at his mother right in front of you. It’s as if you wanted him to die.

You release a huff. No physical labor. Wouldn’t it look more suspicious if you didn’t help? Then his mother would suspect something.

She could also suspect that you were lazy and using her son for-

“His father cooks all the time.” his mother holds onto your hands and offers you such a warm and kind smile. “That’s where he gets it from.”

Jungkook’s mother was a kind woman and she appeared to like you just as Jungkook said she would. She speaks fondly of her son and shares stories of his childhood, all the while Jungkook cooks in the background. He makes you tea, one you usually drink when you feel sick and serves his mother some wine.

“I thought I’ll never get to meet you. Jungkook kept you locked up in here.”

Jungkook chuckles softly at the tone his mother gives him, his cheeks flushing. 

“I…I’ve been busy.” you laugh off, as well. “If I would’ve known you were coming I would’ve…dressed better.”

“Nonsense.” his mother shakes her head with a hearty laugh. “It took a lot of self-control to not come here myself and meet you. You bring so much joy to Kookie’s life.”

Jungkook remains silent, plating the food for the three of you. He glances your way to silently assure that you weren’t overwhelmed. You’re a bit flustered as he can see but comfortable nonetheless.

“Okay~” Jungkook sing-songs after a few more minutes, placing two plates in front of you and his mother. He goes to serve you two some water, as well - extra ice for his mother and just a few cubes for you. Just the way you two enjoyed it.

Jungkook has always enjoyed watching you eat and it increases now that you’re pregnant. He - unbeknownst to you - began to search for what was healthy for the child and how he could introduce it to you in a way you’d enjoy it.

“When are you guys going to tell me?”

You stop chewing to focus your attention on Jungkook's mother.

“The tea…the constant sneaking of stomach rubs…” her eyes lowered to Jungkook’s hand indeed on your stomach - he insisted on touching it whenever because he swore he could feel something, even if you told him that was impossible. “...the fact that I finally was able to meet her after months.”

Jungkook gently taps your thigh as he faces his mother. She offers a little eyebrow raise.

“Okay then, Ma.” Jungkook shrugs. “Y/N’s pregnant. I’m looking for a bigger-”

“I hope it’s a girl.” Jungkook’s mom sighs out. “I’m so sick of all the men.”

She was actually excited, even wrapping you in a hug.

“We can just wait a little longer-“

“We’re not waiting longer, Y/N.” Jungkook cuts you off.

You release a short sigh, your nerves eating you alive at this very moment. 

You didn’t want to have to do this - not now at least. You had time. You could even pop up randomly in a few months with the baby in hand if it meant avoiding telling your parents.

It wasn’t as if your parents were the traditional type. They weren’t married when they had your brother and by the pictures you saw, your mother was heavily pregnant with you at her own wedding.

Still, you always told them that a child was the last thing you wanted, if at all. Your mother always told you it was because you didn’t find a man worth giving a baby to - and you hated to be told “I told you so”.

Your parents were expecting you and Jungkook for dinner this Saturday evening. It was becoming a habit that she saw you and Jungkook once every week. She would gush about how handsome and smart Jungkook was and how happy she noticed you were lately - ew. 

“Why are you so hellbent on waiting anyways?” Jungkook asks. “My mother already knows.”

“That’s because you trapped me.” you seeth.

Jungkook chuckles, poking your cheek playfully. “Because of situations like this, baby.” he says, knocking on the front door. Usually, you would walk in, yet he noticed just how much you were stalling and decided to take things into his own hands. “It’s now or never.”

“I hate you.” you hiss, turning around just as your mother opens the door. “Mother..” you murmur.

“Why are you knocking, Y/N? Come in!” she says, wrapping both you and Jungkook into a hug. “You look even more handsome, Jungkook.”

You roll your eyes and scoff, going deeper into the home. Your brother was already here and appeared to be in a heated debate with your father in the living room while his children, really your niece, ran wild.

“Stop running.” you say to her as she nearly crashes into you. “Or you’re going to fall.” Eventually.

“You’re mean.” was all she responded with and continues to run. Your nephew has since learned how to walk and he attempts to follow his sister, yet he’s much slower.

You release a sigh - this is what your life was going to be soon. A child running around not bothering to listen to you in the slightest.

“I have some wine,” your mother makes her way towards the kitchen where you and Jungkook follow. There’s a pot boiling on the stove and the aroma alone causes your stomach to churn. “Y/N, grab the wine glasses.”

“Hey Jungkook!” your niece runs past you, nearly causing you to stumble to get to the man. She widens her arms. “Can you flip me like you did last time?”

“No.” you deadpan.

“Sure!” Jungkook exclaims.

You sigh.

You grasp two wine glasses, one for your mother and the other for Jungkook. 

Your niece is occupying Jungkook’s time with the amount of time she demands to be flipped while your nephew - who manages to waddle over - watches with slight amazement.

“Why are there only two wine glasses?” your mother asks. 

“I’m not really in the mood to drink.”

Jungkook glances your way, furrowing a brow.

“Why not?” she asks. “You’re always in the mood for wine.”

You shrug your shoulders, hoping that would be the end of it. You make your way to the cabinets to find yourself something to munch on.

“How about a beer?” she asks you, going to the fridge to open it and look for whatever your father has in there. “We have-”

“I don’t want a beer.” you say, taking out some cookies. “Really, mom-”

“Are you sick, Y/N?”

You turn around to face her. “Am I really that much of an alcoholic?” you question, unsure why you declining alcohol was such a big deal. 

“Don’t be so dramatic.” your mother waves you off.

You roll your eyes and dig into the cookies. Your eyes watch as Jungkook begins to play with both kids now, your niece on his back while he swings your nephew around. You swallow, tilting your head a bit at how content he seems to be. They were treating him like a jungle gym but he actually enjoyed it.

“I actually have a bottle of champagne.” your mother says, dragging you out of your thoughts. You hadn’t realized she left the kitchen until she returned with said bottle of champagne. “Expensive, too. I actually bought it on sale!”

Your mother this time actually takes the initiative to grab three glasses herself and pour. Jungkook gives your niece his phone to occupy her while he places your nephew on his shoulders. He strolls over to where you are leaning against the counter.

“Mother…”

“Jungkook.” she hands Jungkook his glass, the bubbling champagne sizzling inside. “And Y/N-”

“I don’t want anything to drink.”

“Well I don’t see why not.” Jungkook gently chuckles at your mothers words. “Jungkook is-”

“I don’t give a damn what Jungkook is doing.” you munch aggressively on another cookie. “He’s the one that got me pregnant.”

Your mother falls silent for a moment, her eyes slowly widening as she registers your words. Your nephew has his chubby hands on Jungkook’s forehead, his chin resting atop of his head. Jungkook is grinning encouragingly. “Not exactly how I wanted to tell you…” he trails off.

“We could’ve said it over dinner if I wasn’t pressured to drink.” you huff, continuing to munch on your cookies in peace. You admit that now that your mother knew, it did take a weight off of your shoulders.

“Preg…nant…?”

Your mothers behavior is different for Jungkook. She’s such a bubbly person that her state right now - wide eyes and shock - has him questioning if she was disappointed or not. He swallows, a deep sorrow running through him. He slowly puts your nephew onto the ground so he can waddle away and he comes face to face with your mother. 

“I love Y/N.” Jungkook exclaims, eyes determined. He didn’t want your mother to think that he was just going to get you pregnant and not plan on being there for you. Sure the two of you were young - but Jungkook loved you and the baby. “And I promise to love her and the baby unconditionally-”

Your mother begins to cry, shuttin Jungkook up. The sorrow runs through him again and his eyes widen. Has this been a mistake?

You roll your eyes. “Happy tears.” you tell Jungkook, not wanting him to break into tears too by getting the wrong idea from your mother. “She’s always this dramatic.”

“My baby,” your mother wraps you in a tight embrace. “is having a baby!”

Jungkook lets out a sigh of relief.

“And by such a sweet and handsome man!” she continues to gush, thanking the heavens that it was by Jungkook, someone she was praying you didn’t scare away with your attitude.

“You’re supposed to scold me about finishing college.” you say, hugging her back. 

“You can still finish college. Don’t be rash.” your mother squeezes you a little tighter. “Don’t stress yourself too hard.”

“That’s what I said!” Jungkook pipes in, nodding his head. “She doesn’t even want to quit her job and allow me to support her.”

You gasp, glaring at Jungkook. He knows that your mother would take his side and this was his plan all along.

“Why must you be so stubborn?” your mother releases you from her tight embrace and scolds you with hard eyes. “It’s not about you anymore, Y/N-”

“Not you, too.” you groan. You didn’t have time for this right now.

“My mother and I are searching for bigger homes.” Jungkook smiles at your mother. “I would love for you to join us.”

“Kiss ass.” you grumble, taking a whole cookie into your mouth.

“I would love to!” your mother is brought to tears again at how loving and genuine Jungkook was. It’s as if she couldn’t believe it. “Have we thought of names-”

“We don’t even know the gender.” you shake your head.

“I,” Jungkook places a hand on his chest. “want a girl.” he admits.

Your mother again sobs - because men typically wanted boys. You roll your eyes right out of your head at how dramatic she was being.

Fuck Jeon Jungkook for having your mother love him harder.

“That was easier than I expected.”

After dinner with your family - where your mother dramatically shared the news of your pregnancy - you and Jungkook returned back home. It felt, dare you say, great not holding in such a secret any longer. Especially since you didn’t feel disappointed.

You always envisioned yourself having a steady career after college and if you found the right person, then marriage. You didn’t like to look too far into the future and think of children, but you suppose now you had to.

“You and your mom are so much alike.” Jungkook chuckles, his hands rubbing along your back. “So emotional at times.”

“Fuck off.”

Jungkook only grins wider, massaging your lower back. He does this every night now, even lighting candles to further relax you. He makes it harder to not depend on him - and that's exactly what he wants.

“Have you thought about what I said?” Jungkook questions. “About working?”

You sigh, your eyes closing. 

“I have.” you murmur. “...you aren’t going to stop pestering me about it.”

“Of course not, baby. You can’t work while pregnant.” Jungkook scoffs. “The man is supposed to provide.”

“It’s the 21st century.” you find your lips curving into a soft smile at his words - fuck Jeon Jungkook for feeling this way. “What if I get bored?”

“You wouldn’t. You’re always sleeping or eating nowadays.”

Your eyes snap open and you furrow a brow.

“Besides, we need to prepare for the baby.” Jungkook’s hands curved on your neck, rubbing his thumbs into it. You sigh low. “Buy baby clothes…furniture.”

You hum, nodding your head slowly. You’ve come across a few baby items that cause your heart to jolt at how adorable they were. You could just imagine decorating the nursery for the baby alongside Jungkook, clothing the baby in little clothes. Getting to see Jungkook hold the baby in his arms similarly to the way he holds your nephew.

Jungkook leans away as you turn to lay on your back. Your eyes flutter open to look at Jungkook. He tilts his head. “Are you okay?”

You nod your head, hand reaching out to touch Jungkook’s. His fingers entangle with yours. “It feels…weird.” you confess. “Being pregnant…we’ll actually be parents soon.”

Jungkook brings your hand to his lips and presses light kisses. 

“I’m happy.” Jungkook admits, though the both of you knew this. “It’s sudden. But…I’m happy.”

Your heart flutters and you lick your lips. “I’m happy, too.” you whisper. “You’ll be a good dad.”

Jungkook’s eyes slightly widen at your words and his heart flutters. Jungkook deepens the kiss on your hand. “You think so?” he murmurs, lowering himself to face you. His breath tickles your skin.

“Yeah.” you nod. Your hand untangles from his and you place it onto your cheek. Your thumb traces his lips - moments like this wasn’t rare anymore. You were more loving to Jungkook now, especially seeing how he was. You’re reminded constantly how good Jungkook treats you and there wasn’t a reason to (pretend) not to like him or his actions.

“You’ll be so good to us.”

You connect your lips to his, hand on his cheek now clasping on his shirt to bring him closer. Your legs wrap around his waist to cage him in.

Jungkook moans into the kiss, cupping your naked thigh, shorts riding up your upper thigh. 

“You’re just trying to make me feel good.” Jungkook snickers.

You hum, connecting your lips to his again, pecking gently. “I want you to fuck me.” you murmur against his lips, going to remove your shorts in a rush.

Jungkook chuckles, licking his lips. “Of course you do.” he states, voice deeper. He wasn’t opposed to this, however. He wanted you whenever you wanted him.

“Don’t act like you don’t want me either.” you manage to get out of your shorts, panties sticking to you.

“I always want you.” Jungkook rushes to do the same, removing his sweatpants. His cock throbs at just the thought of being inside of you. “This is why you’re pregnant now.” his hands go to tug at your panties, fingers forcing their way past them to touch at your clit. “Wanna taste you…”

“No.” you say, pushing him away. “I’m too impatient for that.”

You just needed Jungkook inside of you, no foreplay needed - for now. You push your panties off and swing your leg over to get atop of him.

“Fuck - okay.” Jungkook doesn’t need to be told twice. He loved foreplay with you - you on his tongue or his fingers deep inside of you. He loved it all.

Your hand reaches back to grasp his cock, centering it at your entrance. You bite your lip, fluttering your eyes to look directly into Jungkook’s ones.

You enter his cock slowly, your lips parting to release a moan.

Jungkook pushes his head deeper against his pillows, his hands placed on your hips as you begin to buckle them. “You’re so beautiful…”

“I barely did anything yet and you’re already simping.”

It’s flattering, however, that it doesn’t take long for Jungkook to indeed simp for you. 

You sit on Jungkooks cock fully and shudder. The hair on your skin rises at how full you feel with him inside of you. It’s a feeling that isn’t foreign, yet a sensation that you could never get enough of.

You don’t bother to waste any time, immediately going to buckle your hips in a rhythmic motion that has the man groaning beneath you. You rarely were the one in control, but when you were it always drove Jungkook crazy. Maybe he was just obsessed with you as you said.

You lean back, head pushed back and your eyes closed with your hands begin to roam his chest. To Jungkook, you were beautiful like an angel who’s light is shining brightly down at you. He just knows the way you fuck yourself against his cock that it feels good to you. Your pussy is squelching and your moans only grow louder and louder by the second.

“You’re getting tired.” Jungkook notes, instantly thrusting upwards to meet you halfway. “I can take over.”

You don’t fight him - you never did. However, Jungkook doesn’t move from his position and instead continues to ram into you, his nails digging into your skin. 

“It’s…so deep.” you groan, your head hanging. 

Stamina unmatched, Jungkook's hips never halter. His eyes are unblinking, as well, watching every reaction this caused. 

Jungkook leans forward to wrap both arms around your body protectively, continuing his brutal pounding. His lips leave wet kisses upon your skin, a need to taste you like he always does - but he understands you need to cum now.

“You look so pretty on my cock. Like always…”

Maybe it’s the pregnancy that allows you to have this new found glow to you - that or his mind was playing tricks on him. Regardless, he wants nothing more than to cum deep inside of you like the both of you desire. 

“I know you’re going to cum…” Jungkook continues, this time placing his lips onto yours.You two engage into a heated kiss turned makeout session, somehow him never ceasing his thrusts. Your tongue dances with his and all you could truly think about was cumming right now.

“...g…gonna cum…” you say between kisses, your hands tangling into Jungkook’s dark tresses for support and he doesn’t mind in the slightest. “....wanna feel you cum in me.”

Jungkook groans - this is why you are pregnant now, he thinks - such dirty words and needy-like that he cannot help but give you what you want. His tongue licks onto your skin, trailing down your jaw to your neck. His teeth clamp down onto your skin.

You’re cumming as Jungkook’s teeth continue to nip at your skin, eyes fluttering close. Jungkook himself isn’t far behind, sloppy thrusts pounding deep into your wound and echoing off of the wall until he too is cumming hard, milky ropes of cum painting them entirely.

months later….

@minaamhh @suciedad-divina @satisfied18 @y2k5bby @petalsofink @swga-ficrecs @xtrataerrestrial @danielle143 @thelilbutifulthings @jksjx @busanbby-jjk @joonlover1207 @hollowtree11 @amberpanda99 @parkinglot-nights @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @hoseokteardrop @subtaegguk @jingerbreadoutofstock

[sugudoe]

more headcanons but don't know what to do? what to write for? MAY I SUGGEST 🫵 JJK X SICK READER. HOW THE BOYS CARE FOR THEIR PARTNER.

ᡴꪫ a/n: hii, this took so long to be answered, but here it is!! gojo, for me, fix himself in all of this categories, but i put him in the first two, because he might be a little shit to anyone weaker than him, but never his loved one, right? idk, actually. @emilyywhyy

ᡴꪫ cw: sickness symptoms such as vomiting and headache \\ fluff and crack \\ english is not my first language

📲────𝗁𝗎𝗌𝖻𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗆𝖺𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗂𝖺𝗅 𓏸ㅤ۪ ︶ྀི

You don’t want to admit that you are sick. You will say that your nose is running because of weather change, and your shivers are, also, caused by weather change. You are fine, healthy as a horse ── except that the horse is nearly dying.

Don’t call attention, you think. So, you dress yourself in your uniform, and go to work.

He spot your illness right away, and have none of it. Grabbing your hands and taking you to your home. You can complain all you want, he doesn’t give a single fuck. You think you are above this sickness, but he knows better.

“Stop pouting.” He scoffs, as gently as a scoff can sound.

You, however, don’t stop. Even if you really, really want to. Because, after all, he has you wearing a comfortable pajama, sitting on the couch, and he is feeding you soup with bread.

The shower was hot, the medicines were taken, the carefulness of it all ── you love him, and he loves you. You will not say it, besides a small thank you. And he, the bastard with a smirk, will say “It’s alright.”

The pout is long gone, by now. You are desperate to sleep, and he lets you with ease, no kisses on the head, even if you complain (he will, a single peck). And while you fall to slumber, he will clean the house, keep tissues by your bed and, like a fucking psychic, a bow as well.

Throwing up in front of your boyfriend is not on the list of Things To Do With Your Love! But, hey, if he loves you while vomiting your organs out, maybe that’s good. Right?

Yes!

He is soothing, and calm, and collected. Let it be know, throughout your dazed weak state, that the moment you become healthy, he must be prepared to be smothered by your kisses.

He accepts them all, of course.

NANAMI, SUGURU, HIGURUMA, MEGUMI, SHIU, KOKICHI, NORITOSHI, GOJO

📲────𝖼𝗎𝗍𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖽𝗎𝗆𝖻 𓏸ㅤ۪ ︶ྀི

Oh, poor baby! No, not you, him. Yes, you’re sick, yes, the world is hammering your head. But, look at him, desperate eyes and clueless questions. So cute.

You didn’t got up from the bed today, and he leave you to it thinking you need your energy back from work, not knowing that you are dying. Dramatic, aren’t you? Yes, the light in the room is murderous, as much as the sound of him making food, but you can’t do anything about it, except try to sleep.

He can only take much of your absence before growing clingy. So, he marches his way to your room, and… where are you? “Bathroom,” you answer amidst a cry.

The light is turned off, and you are showering with your clothes. Weird little thing you are. Dumb little thing he is. Still not acknowledging your sickness. Not until you tell him, and like that, his brain goes into normal human being mode.

He showers with you, making you stand and lean on his also clothed body, you close your eyes and whimpers happily while he pretends the hot water isn’t burning his skin whole. More minutes in, he changes you both to warm sweaters, and guide you to the kitchen ── is nuggets good to eat while sick?

No. But you do anyways, and asks him to buy soup. He does, easily. Except, he buys all flavors, to the point where you know the sickness will go away and you still will have soup in your refrigerator.

He will feed you, cooing at your crying face. And, he will also lick the spoon. Dumb bitch, you think.

He knows where the medicines are, so he brings them all to you. You search until you find the one you need, and a glass with water is being given to you ── can you drink cold water? Probably no, but, again, you do anyways.

He is a cute sight for such a painful time. He does everything accordingly, even if he might make some mistakes. But, don’t worry, next time he will be prepared… A bit.

CHOSO, YUUJI, TOGE, JUNPEI, GOJO, YUTA, TAKUMA,

📲────𝖺𝗀𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗏𝖾𝗅𝗒 𝖼𝖺𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𓏸ㅤ۪ ︶ྀི

He knows you are sick, and it’s not as if he doesn’t care, but he simply forgets that some people ── you ── are not as strong as he is.

So, fend yourself, love.

Just kidding. Kinda.

The thing is, he might be the not cute clueless boyfriend, but he learns quick, okay?

So, the first few hours, he will keep coming back to the room, trying to see if you woke up, even checking your pulse, when it become too much. And, when it does, it finally clicks to him, you’re sick as fuck.

Effortlessly, he raises you from the bed and give you a shower, holding your sleepy head while mumbling with himself. He might have said something rude, you won’t ever know, because he is massaging your head right now, and that’s the only thing that matters.

He puts you back in bed with one of his shirts and panties, and he rolls you on the covers like a burrito, before grabbing your burritoself to the living room.

He gives you medicine. It might not be the exact one you need, and just the first pill he seen, but it does ease the feeling. He, also, leave you alone on the carpeted floor before returning with soup and more medicine, this time it’s the right.

You feed yourself under his cautious eyes, he only does when your wobbling fingers bothers him, with a “Tsk” he feeds you.

You want to laugh. “Can you do an airplane?”

You finish feeding yourself. Worth it, though.

He comes back later, manhandling you again, to the bed. Surprisingly, he lies you on top of him, caressing your back and your head, kissing your temple and calling you his weak little thing, that he actually loves. Well, he doesn’t say that exactly, but you rather see it as that, even in your dazed state.

SUKUNA, TOJI, KUSAKABE

[tulip-room]

Crush Next Door - s. kiyoomi

syn. your childhood friend that you lose contact with moves next door

Ch. 6 || Intervention

warnings. None that I can think of <3

words. 1.3k

prev >> series masterlist >> next

-‘๑’- Present, 2 months later

One thing about Sakusa and Komori is that no matter how far apart they may move from each other there is one thing that is concrete. Monthly dinners. Of course it would be unfair to ask either of them to always show up in person so they made a deal that if they couldn’t actually be there then they would FaceTime. Sakusa for all his indifference when asked about his personal life loved the monthly dinners. He would never admit it out loud but he did miss his cousin sometimes.

Today was one of the lucky few months that they were able to meet in person. Volleyball games weren’t until later that month and they had much to talk about. “So, I had to hear from the troublesome trio about your new neighbor,” Komori teases as he takes a sip of his water.

“I wish you would stop calling them that. Instead of an insult they’re taking the name with pride.” Sakusa rolls his eyes as he takes a bite of his food. “And, what is it that you want to know?”

Komori leans forward, chin in the palm of his hand as his elbow rests on the table. “Just that we’ve had two months worth of dinners and you didn’t tell me Y/N was around.” He squints his eyes playfully at Sakusa. “I missed her too, you know,” he says as he takes a bite of his salad.

“It’s really not that big a deal. It just slipped my mind,” his phone buzzes on the table. Komori looks at the object with a raised eyebrow.

“Yes, it slipped your mind that you happened to move next door to the girl you used to like.” He pulls his lips into a tight line as he remarks sarcastically. He points his fork at Sakusa after eating the bite on it. “Do you still like her?” 

“I never stopped,” Sakusa even surprises himself a bit at the answer. Komori’s chews slow to a stop as he analyzes his cousin’s face. A smile etched onto his face as he swallows his bite of food.

“You have to tell her.” 

“She probably doesn’t feel the same.”

“You’ve been harboring this crush since like middle school, come on.” Komori tries to urge him as Sakusa’s phone buzzes against the table again. “Do you not usually put that on do not disturb when we have dinner?” He questions as the device buzzes again. 

His eyes light up as he sees red take over Sakusa’s face. How he suddenly can’t look him in the eyes, the happy smile on his face turns into a smirk as he puts two and two together. “Oh? It is on do not disturb. She just goes through it huh?” 

“Stop.” Sakusa scrunches his face up a little bit at the teasing and covers his face with his hand. Komori lets out a laugh at the action.

“Go on, tell Y/N I said hi,” he goes back to eating but still watches as Sakusa picks up his phone. He watches as a smile takes over his features seemingly subconsciously as he texts you. After a few minutes of Sakusa smiling as he texts you he puts his phone down and returns to Komori.

“Y/N says she’s sorry for interrupting dinner but also says hi and that you should come by sometime.” He relays to Komori as he takes another bite of his food. 

“She always was so sweet, I’ll stop by soon.” He nods and the two sit in silence again as they finish their meals. When their waiter comes by again Sakusa asks for banana bread to go and Komori looks confused for a moment again.

“You don’t like sweet-“ he cuts himself off as realization takes over. “Oh my goodness. You are not,” he squeals a little bit and laughs. 

Sakusa sends a small glare his way. “Yes I am. It’s our joke now.” 

“You have to tell me how she reacts.” 

“She’ll probably laugh and reminisce on the past again.” 

“Sounds about right,” Komori nods his head and finishes off his drink. “You know the trio are still trying to figure out who she is to you besides just a childhood friend.” 

“Then they’re stupider than I thought if they haven’t figured it out by now.”

“Fair, you are quite smitten when it comes to her. You never told me about the rings though, even after all of these years you’ve kept it a secret.” Komori prods and questions.

“And it will stay like that. They’re something for me and her, suffer with the fact you may never find out.”

“Ugh,” he groans and throws his head back. “Come on, you gotta give me something to work with here.”

“It’s a reference to something.”

Komori deadpans at him, clearly not amused at the ‘hint’ as Sakusa gives him a knowing smile. “Alright, pack it up.” Komori throws his hands up in mock frustration. “Well, it can’t be the dance. You didn’t get them until the following year.” Komori tries to put the pieces together. “I genuinely have no clue.”

“When you figure it out you’re gonna be so mad.” Sakusa lets out a small chuckle and spins the ring on his finger, it’s become a habit of his when he’s bored or anxious. 

“Is it obvious?” 

“Extremely. Especially when you pay attention to what she says.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He quirks an eyebrow up and looks Sakusa up and down.

“Ask her if you want to know so bad. You know my lips are sealed.” Sakusa makes a gesture of pretending to zip his mouth closed and throw it away.

“Will you at least confess to her? Please, I’ve watched you two pine over each other for years,” he says pleadingly and pouts a little bit at Sakusa. 

Sakusa hums in thought for a moment. “I’m not sure she likes me. What if everything has just been platonic? I haven’t seen her in years, what if this is just how she is with everyone? I really like her. I think I would be okay just being her friend if it meant she wasn’t uncomfortable. If it means keeping her in my life.” He shrugs and continues to fidget with the ring. His in much worse condition than hers was. 

His ring is far more tarnished from years of being worn on his gym bag or hand. There’s scrapes on the metal and the red crystals don’t shine quite like they used to. The blue of her crystals still shine and her ring doesn’t have nearly as many scrapes. 

“Kiyoomi, I’m gonna hold your hand when I say this.” He jokingly puts his hand out on the table and Sakusa rolls his eyes and pushes it away. “That girl is head over heels for you. Has been for years. Please do something before you lose her again.”

Now that strikes a cord with him. Lose you? He didn’t want to think about that happening again. “Fine,” he can see the smile coming back to Komori’s face. “But I’ll need help.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “I'm so gonna regret this.”

“Leave it to me, I’ll find help.” The two begin planning how he’ll confess. He decided not to go to a public place since that puts too much pressure on you. He needs it to be perfect, he’s spent this long loving you. He’s not going to mess it up because he didn’t think about what you would want. 

“As long as it isn’t those three,” Sakusa narrows his eyes as his cousin’s smile just grows wider. “I don’t know if I want the help anymore,” he jokes. They decide on a plan and leave the restaurant before the rain starts. Miles away you curse the skies as they downpour. The one day you didn’t have an umbrella. You have to walk home in the rain.

taglist. @hiraethwa @loveelylacey @3lectraheart @cosmiicdust @empress-pug-pug @angelkiyo @whosmarjj

stay a while why don't you? check out my other stuff

[areallyyellowmango]

What’re your Milkplane headcanons?

Thank you for the ask! Here are some of my headcanons for Milkplane (Steven x Francis)!

》 Despite being casually friendly with most of the neighbors, Steven is the only one Francis would consider an actual friend, or the closest thing to that

Steven was the only one able to break through Francis’ metaphorical shell, out of sheer stubbornness and repeatedly trying until the milkman couldn't just give him small-talk monosyllable answers anymore. People usually gave up on befriending Francis before ever reaching that point, but for some reason, the man was persistent

》 Steven often invites Francis for a smoke in his apartment to decompress after work.

Francis doesn't really smoke too often, but entering the Rudboys’ apartment without getting caught up in the smoke and smell of cigars and cigarettes is nearly impossible, so he allows himself one or two every now and then

Steven doesn't smoke quite as much or as often as his dad does, but he thinks it makes him look cool, so naturally he does it when Francis is around

Sometimes they chat for hours while they smoke, sometimes they just hang out together silently. It all depends on Francis’ mood. If he feels like talking, then Steven is more than willing to talk

》 Mclooy is very welcoming of Francis, eventually warming up to him almost like his own son

He invites (read: damn near forces) Francis over for dinner often, knowing the milkman rarely eats more than noodles and stale bread for dinner if allowed to

In exchange, on the days when he's off work, Francis often helps Mclooy out with shopping and cooking.

》 It gets to a point where, in the evenings, it becomes much more common to find the milkman in the neighboring apartment rather than in his own, most days of the week

Mclooy often jokes about the two being together so often they look like they're together together

He doesn't really mean it in a meanspirited way, but certainly as nothing but a joke, considering this was 50s

》 Eventually, to their surprise, so much time together did result in unexpected feelings, after all

Steven fell first, Francis fell harder

If he was to be honest, Steven had always found Francis to be an objectively attractive man, ever since first laying eyes on him. It may or may not have been one of the reasons why he was so insistent on trying to get close to him.

Steven is very good at hiding it behind his usual chill and easygoing demeanor, though. The sunglasses are also a big help.

Francis is a disaster when he's into someone, though. Sometimes he doesn't really know what to say, his already sheepish-looking rare smile becomes even more awkward, and he mentally hits himself whenever he ends up doing or saying something he considers stupid

》 Steven is one of the very few people who know about Francis’ past with Nacha, and that he suspects Anastacha might be his daughter due to the timeline of her birth and how alike they are. He doesn't mention it further unless Francis brings it up first though.

Other than that, they don't know much about eachother's romantic past at first

》 Steven has loved many women in the past, but he's also been with men during his time in deployment with the airforce, and is pretty comfortable with the fact that he's into any sort of person at this point

Francis had never been attracted to another man before, and it felt scary to him at first, the fear of finding out something so new about himself, and of being chastised for it

》 It takes a looong long time before the two of them get together. It's a long process between Francis coming to terms with his attraction, feeling comfortable enough to explore it, and the two of them taking it slow and gentle.

Per Francis’ request, they keep it a secret for a long time as well, to the point where getting into their little unspecified relationship even distances them from eachother a little bit for a while, only truly getting to be together when they were alone

And now some silly general headcanons about their relationship!

》 Whenever Francis is over for dinner, Mclooy every now and then makes jokes about him to Steven in spanish - their first language -, knowing the milkman won't understand it and purposefully leaving him confused

Eventually Steven teaches Francis some basic spanish, just enough for him to be able to understand what his dad is saying, allowing him to catch Mclooy redhanded. It did result in a good laugh between them since it was all in good fun, and it actually made his father-in-law-to-be like and respect him more

》 Francis doesn't do well with heights, which isn't a very good match when dating an aircraft pilot who is hellbent on taking him on a scenic flight in a private plane someday

》 Steven doesn't do well with dairy, which wasn't a very good match when having a crush on the milkman, and when the only excuse he had to talk to him everyday at first was whenever he brought bottles upon bottles of milk to his apartment

Instead of telling Francis about it and risking him stopping coming over altogether, Steven just stocked the milk bottles away in the fridge, only remembering about them when it'd already long gone bad

》 Their first kiss was very “hasn't kissed anyone ever vs expecting a kiss with tongue” coded. Obviously Francis had kissed other people before, but he had no idea what to do or where to put his hands when kissing another man.

》 Their song is “My Funny Valentine”

And by “their song”, read “a song that played constantly on Mclooy's radio and Francis could hear from his apartment through the painfully thin walls, and while he hated the noise at first, he began to relate the song to the Rudboys and to Steven in particular overtime”

》 Francis is the only one in the building (besides Mclooy) who knows what Steven's eyes look like underneath the sunglasses

》 They have code words they say to eachother whenever they first meet each day to make sure they're not doppelgangers

[tmntxthings]

∑一 Do You Realize?・゜・。

author’s notes: idk what to say & also idk what i wrote, i was floating during this XD but we post anyhow

warnings: fluff, slice of life, flirt, cursing? unedited asf, suggestive perhaps??? if you squint?? or maybe like peanut butter a lot???

song: “ Do You Realize?? by The Flaming Lips ”

—————————————————————————

Michelangelo was quiet as he ate his peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Though it was more peanut butter than jelly. Which really may have been even more disturbing than the silence. Who in their right mind liked the way it got stuck in the roof of their mouth?

“…”

You munched on your own sandwich. A proportionate amount of pb and j on either bread slice. After swallowing you decided to speak up.

“What?”

His response was immediate after a blink or two.

“I didn’t say anything!”

“Yeah but I know you’ve got something to say,”

He goes back to that odd quietness again. His fingers squeezing onto the sandwich too tightly. Peanut butter getting all over his hands. Well. Even more so than before. Truthfully he had been sticking his fingers in the jar to eat it raw earlier.

“…it’s weird.”

A teasing tone came from your voice as you nudged your shoulder with his.

“Can’t be weirder than eating peanut butter with your fingers.”

“Hey!” An offended lilt heard from Mikey. But it couldn’t be helped!

“Just kidding..” “Mostly..” You offered as a compromise. His head tilted from side to side, seeming to let it go in favor of the initial conversation.

“Well, I was just thinking about how we’re all gonna die one day.” Now you hadn’t been expecting that. Not at all. Mikey had his weird quips. But this was darker than most! You wondered if his favorite pizza place had been demolished again offhandedly before saying the first word that came to your mind.

“Oh?” But it didn’t stop there!

“And that, I’d just hope you’d be around when it happens for me.”

Now that was just too much. It was sad. It was sweet. It was all wrapped up in emotions that had you looking Mikey in the eyes, pb fingers and all and giving him a small smile.

“Damn..” Again you were at a lack of words here. You wished you could say more. In fact you should’ve just said, ‘same’ or ‘me too Mikey’ or anything other than something so meaningless.

“Yeah, weird right?” He didn’t seem put off by your lack of response. His eyes had met yours, returning the smile before looking back down at his food. Taking another bite.

“A little, but not the strangest thing ever.” Which was true. You had to endure Leo after all. And he said random shit all the time. Though not as philosophical. Maybe Donnie would be closer to this category.

“Also!” Mikey spoke up around his bite.

“Oh there’s more?” You pop the last bite into your mouth. Dusting off the crumbs on your fingers on the paper plate below. Reaching for the bottle of water that had sat untouched since the two of you had sat down for the midnight snack.

“Yeah! I was also thinking about how life goes by super fast, and all the good moments too, it’s the bad ones that tend to drag out. I just wonder why that is.” This was longer, and even more confusing than the first.

“Hmm” Your eyebrows went together, thinking of what to say. Holding off for longer than before. But your mind was still blank. The thoughts weren’t weird, in fact you felt they were true. But..“I couldn’t even begin to try and pretend that I know the answer,”

“Yeah,” Mikey sighed in agreement. It was something he couldn’t answer too.

“And another thing!”

It seemed Mikey was on a roll tonight. You propped your elbow up on the table. Letting your hand cup your cheek as you leaned into it. Pushing the paper plate away from underneath you. “Mhm?” You listened intently. Well you thought you had been. Because you got some words but not the others as you watched his eyes rather than his lips.

You caught words like, “face” “happiness” “realize” It all didn’t really make much sense. But his eyes, the way they lighted up as you paid attention. It was so endearing. Unlike the rest of him that was green and orange, and okay he had splashes of other colors with his stickers too. But his eyes. They held a mixture of such a striking red and a mellow amber. It was far from anything you had ever seen, much like the turtle himself. Entrancing.

“You didn’t hear a word I just said did you?” He mused. And you were caught red handed as you sheepishly tried to play it off, listing the words you did catch with a bit of embarrassment. “Well that just won’t do, listen close okay?” Mikey said and his hands went up as if to cup your face, but he still had peanut butter covering them so instead you held onto his wrists, nodding in confirmation.

“Do you realize that you have the most beautiful smile? The one when you’re especially happy?” You squeezed his wrists, giving him a rueful expression. Was he being serious? Of course he was! He was smiling at your bashfulness, but nothing in his stare said he was playing you. “Thanks for enlightening me,” you say, though the blush can’t be helped.

“Your welcome!” And he had the audacity to wink as he took one peanut butter covered finger and stuck it in his mouth. You blinked. How could he go from borderline flirting to— to?!? Whatever he was doing now??? Eating obliviously?? It was times like these where you wondered. The lower half of your face hidden behind a hand pressed against your mouth. Trying to cover that embarrassingly bright blush. You wondered if Mikey actually did know what he was doing, and he was just a damn good actor at pretending not to know.

As you recomposed yourself, lost in thoughts like those. You didn’t pay any mind to Mikey turning slightly to the side and winking at no one in particular.

Yeah he knew. And yeah he does it on purpose.

;D

—————————————————————————

[yandere-fics]

♡ How She Acts When She First Brings You Home ♡

(sorry I struggled to end it, I hope you still like it, this is also funny because I do not eat lo mein anymore, I don't eat any noodles or bread.)

You'd nearly crapped your pants yesterday when The Boss spotted you at the office and told you that you were her mate and you would be moving in with her the following day. She wasn't there the next morning when the security team helped you move your stuff into her penthouse but there were little sticky notes everywhere explaining things, perhaps she thought you'd have an easier time adapting to your new home without your new mate lurking over your shoulder but either way you did appreciate having time for yourself before you were thrust into being her mate.

That peace did have to come to an end though because sometime around 4 PM she knocked on the door lightly calling out, "My Beloved, I'm going to come inside now, okay?" Someone might think you were her new cat with how she was treating you, stepping lightly and talking quietly to not spook you.

"H-hello Ma'am?" You stood up from the couch still surrounded by boxes because you really weren't sure where you were allowed to put your belongings. As she walked closer you realized she was so much fucking taller than you, at the very least 6'4 but her shoulders were broad which also gave her the appearance of being a behemoth, yeah she was gonna tear you apart at some point.

"It's Sawyer, Beloved. Why haven't you unpacked yet?" She tilted her head at you, she had only got you yesterday so she hadn't had time to install cameras in the pent house yet, if she had then she would have called you and asked you why you hadn't unpacked much sooner in the day. She'd need to remedy the camera problem quickly.

"I-I don't know where I'm allowed to put my stuff." You tried not to look up at her, her eyes felt like they were constantly sizing you up though that was actually just her appreciating finally having her mate in front of her.

"Anywhere you'd like, or if you prefer I can help you tomorrow?" You nodded, sure spending time with her was hard but it was your life from now on and hopefully if she helped then it would minimize the risk of you moving things too much and having her get angry at you. "First we should have dinner though, you must be hungry I'm sure."

"Yes m-ma'am, uhm S-sawyer, I'm hungry..." She hummed in approval when you said her name and went to go order dinner for the both of you.

"I ordered Lo Mein for us, Beloved, I heard this place was popular amongst the humans nowadays but I'm willing to order something else if you wish." She didn't want to let you know the place was extremely expensive and usually took a reservation to get, you likely wouldn't be comfortable with that at this stage of the relationship. "Would you care to take a bath while we wait? It may help you de-stress, I have lots of oils. Oh! Also I have bathrobes prepared so you need not worry about that part yet, My Beloved."

Okay so she was a lot more nicer than you had expected but this was likely the part where she jumped you like a wild animal and your suspicions would be confirmed right? Wrong! Because here you were ten minutes late as she rubbed scents into your hair complimenting how beautiful it was and how she appreciated you allowing her to care for it.

"Uhm Ma- Sawyer aren't you going to do something with m-me?" You had to bite the bullet if you wanted to get this over with quick, you didn't want to live in fear of when it was coming, afterall weren't supernaturals supposed to be instantly attracted to their mates, you'd heard people usually mated same day as they met and Sawyer was the boss so shouldn't her desires be increased?

"Do you want me to do something with you?" Sawyer already knew the answer was no just by your smell alone but she did hope that you would when she had gotten home, still even if she wanted you she was more than willing to wait for it.

"N-no, it's just-" "It's just you thought I'd jump your bones the moment I had you in my penthouse?" She cut you off frowning only for a moment when you nodded in response before returning to a straight face and continuing to take care of your hair. "Here come on out, Beloved."

"I'm sorry. I s-shouldn't have assumed." You took her hand as she stood up from the bath and pulled you up gently, passing you a towel and some of your pajamas.

"I'll buy you better pajamas as soon as I can get the tailor in, he's from the demon realm so it may take a week or so." She looked away from you going behind a partition to change into her clothes though you could still see the top of her head poking out. "Not to worry, I will never look unless I know you want me to."

"I'm alright, I d-don't need much." She tutted, leaning against the wall as she waited for you to finish dressing, getting an alert on her phone that her security team had placed the food on the kitchen table for the both of you. "Well maybe just one outfit." It wasn't what she wanted clearly but she did seem pleased with your response.

"The food arrived, My Beloved, shall we go eat?" She looked at your wet hair with a frown as you walked over to her letting her know you were dressed, snapping it dry with a partial grin and offering you her arm.

"Y-yeah that sounds nice." This was still shaky territory and you made sure to remind yourself that the entire time you ate, sure she was nice now during dinner but what might she be expecting come nightfall, you couldn't fall for her charms yet, this was still very much your former boss who held the entire city in her pocket. There was no such thing as too much caution with her.

"We could cuddle now that we've eaten, if you would like, My Beloved." She took your plates to the sink, setting them there for her to deal with at a later time, for now she just wanted to hold you meanwhile you wanted to skip straight to bedtime despite it being early in the day, at least that way her intentions would reveal themselves early.

"A-actually I'd like to go to sleep if that's okay with you?" Finally you could get rid of these confusing thoughts because the true her would show itself, the moment she had you on her bed, surely you would finally see for yourself what things she truly had in mind for you. Except no because she laid you very carefully in the crook of her arm and barely even seemed to want to breathe too heavily, scared of disrupting your rest.

"S-sawyer? W-why haven't you done anything?" You must be ugly, that must be it, that is the only reason a monster like her has not jumped you yet, except it didn't really make sense if you gave it even a second of thought because soulmates where supposed to be the most desirable thing to a person and she had showered you in praise and compliments the entire time she watched you eat what you suspected was highly expensive Lo Mein.

"My Beloved, I already told you, nothing will happen until you want it, so be at ease and sleep." She placed a tender kiss on the top of your head, frowning slight as you rolled around to face her. "Are you having trouble sleeping, My Beloved? We could always move elsewhere and try to fall asleep again later."

"N-no, uhm would you just talk to me while I fall asleep? I'd love to learn more about you?" She smiled and gave you a kiss on the forehead before chatting away about some goats that she used to see on the mountain where she grew up which was boring enough for you to finally drift off to sleep, finally convinced she was not in fact going to do something awful to you.

[moonieandi]

I NEED YOUR HELP- lol- sorry that’s such an interesting way to start an ask ‘I NeEd YoUR HelP?!?’ Haha- anyway- I’m thinking about writing a Stanley x reader! Kinda like what you’re doing but different- now I would totally give you more info on that except like- then it would give it away lol. All I really need help with is A.) how do you write Stanley as well as you do?! And B.) how do you normally start a story- I’ve been having a hard time with intros lately.

Also! you don’t have to help me out! Don’t feel pressured! I’m just asking bc I love your snapshots I think they are literally the bestest!! And I wanna be able to help readers feel that way when I write too!! I hope you are still taking care of yourself! Drink lots of water! Eat lots of snap peas! (They are the BEST-) and most importantly sleep well! I know you’re busy so make sure you take time for you! Have a safe and successful move too!

HI! HELLO! I'm so sorry I couldn't answer you right away, one bc I was so busy up until LEGIT JUST THIS VERY MOMENT, and two because I want to help anyway I can, and want my answer to actually be fleshed out!

Firstly, omg so sweet of you that you want my help <3 I'm so happy you reached out and SUPER excited to give you some insight! I encourage anyone who wants to write TO write, it's a great creative outlet (and also I love any and all Stan content hehe)- so:

A.) i. Stanley is based in my head off of my own fantastical characterization of him (which I'll get to in a moment), and also the character we know from the actual show OBVIOUSLY. I started by, of course, rewatching the show. Because I wanted to, and to also take note of his character in each episode. This consisted of getting some basic information about him from anything from his fear of heights to his terrible (great) sense of humor. The clear drive from Stanley is his deep love of family, and general familial bonds (Soos and Wendy). He takes "odd ones out" under his wing on the regular, because HE is an odd one out. People who don't ordinarily fit in are his bread and butter (and also his general sales pitch). He appreciates the oddities in people, in contrast to his brothers interest in ACTUAL oddities. He goes out of his way to keep these bonds, especially with these kids he's not-so-randomly taken under his wing (that he more than likely took in for the summer, trying to reconnect with family and therefore Ford in anyway he could). This tells me he's also a caring man, a weirdly desperate man, and more considerate than people on a surface level may give him credit for. Now this characterization maayyyy be a stretch but that's where the fun comes in!! YOU get to interpret these little things in any way you like, maybe he has a weird relationship with tangerines, maybe he can't keep eye contact on a date for a particular reason- and those situations can just flesh him out more!

ii. NOW the ""romantic"" side of things are of course skimmed from the romance I know from other media (and of course my own lovelife). I take this characterization of him, and find another characters I know and love to MAKE writing him in these situations easier- seeing as we do never see him IN these actual romantic stations (outside of the dating sim and that one failed date- WHICH can also play a role in how you write him romantically!) Stan reminds me of the suaveness and shyness of men in 90's romcoms: surprisingly well-meaning but stupidly flustered. I'd say Brenden Fraiser in his early romcom's come across like this or even Bill Pullman in While You Were Sleeping. It encompasses some of what I believe Stan to be in general: weirdly shy, unable to come out with it, flippantly sweet, sarcastic, and stupidly endearing. I also get general influence from more recent reference(s), the main one being Nick Miller from New Girl. I don't think I need to explain myself with that one. ALSO if you don't understand any of these references I apologize- but I very much encourage you to find your own references in ANY form of media! I even find myself inspired by art at times!

B.) Intro's are hard!! It feels like the hardest part at times. You need to hook the reader, engage them quickly, and have them come back curious!! I will reassure you with one thing: intro's do NOT have to be long! I'd encourage you to keep the intro sweet and simple with not tooooooo many details! don't over-explain to the reader, it may discourage them from continuing (in my opinion!). I take the "shoot first and ask questions later" approach. Throw the reader into a scene giving context clues to where in the story's timeline we are being thrown into. Flash forward and then back into the future! Start on an action scene- hell have the opening scene being two significant characters meeting! it's completely up to you, but I am reassuring you it doesn't have to be long, and DON'T make it too complicated! Complicate things later, grab the reader in the first chapter, and then explain some things later on! Let me also assure you: you do NOT have to write your story backwards, and you don't have to have a finite and "final" story ready to go. Have point A be the beginning and point B be the end and YOU make the trail from A to B!

And above all HAVE FUN!

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

Hello !!! Can I ask for Terry with this prompt "I'm pretty sure I've discovered a new species of roach, can you come over and kill it for me?" ? With or without a smut, you decide ! Congrats again for yours 1000 followers ❤️❤️

Masterlist

I am Australian, our bugs are made of different stuff.

The Bathroom Roach

Contains: Fluff, cockroaches, smut.

1.7K words

There are approximately 4,000 species of cockroaches in the world, and only about four of them are found in North America.

All you wanted was a long, hot shower after work, but clearly, that was too much to ask for. You saw it the moment you pulled back the shower curtain, a great big cockroach with white stripes down its wings and long spindly antennas.

You didn't scream, there was no reason to, you were much bigger and smarter than the bug and would defeat it and enjoy your shower. Or so you thought because, by the time you had returned from getting bug spray, the thing had moved.

You looked around the bathroom, but the monster roach had found you first and with one wrong move, it was flying at your face.

You did the only thing you could think of and called your boyfriend, hoping he would take mercy on you and leave work early to come and kill it. The phone rang, and Terry answered happily, the sound of traffic filtering behind his voice, "What can I do for you Doll? I'm just in traffic heading home now."

"I'm pretty sure I've discovered a new species of roach, can you come over and kill it for me?" You had never seen anything like it before, not even on the subway after midnight.

He sounded amused, "Sure Doll, give me fifteen minutes and I'll be there."

"Don't laugh Terry, it's the size of a house and flew at me. I'm pretty sure it's an invasive species." You could understand why he was chuckling under his breath, you were always the one to leave the harmless spider in the corner so this was out of character.

He sighed, "It's New York gorgeous, it probably just drunk sewer water."

You sat posed with the can pointed at the door in your hand, "Well hurry, it might eat me if you take too long."

Terry's horn beeped, "I'll be there soon."

****

You heard Terry's key in the door, and then he was kicking off his shoes and running into the bedroom, "Hey y/n." He came closer, bending down to peck your cheek and taking the can from your hand, "Was it so bad that you had to stay in a towel?"

You blinked, "Being butt naked is the last thing on my mind."

He chuckled, "Alright then, I'll go kill this thing then you can have a shower and I'll order takeout. How does that sound?"

You nodded, "Yeah, ok, please hurry." Terry wielded the can like a gun, closing the door so the strong smelling spray stayed in the bathroom. It took a few minutes before you heard Terry let out a string of curses then there was the dull sound of soft thuds.

He came out moments later, his eyes wide and his face pale, "I take it back Doll, that thing was huge."

Your eyes went wide, "Is it dead?"

He nodded, "Very. I'm gonna go get your disinfect and clean up for you, I may have gone a bit overboard trying to bludgeon it with your hand soap and it's gone everywhere."

"Did the spray not…."

Terry shook his head, "Nope, it just made it mad."

You waited while Terry cleaned up, the breeze for the window he must have opened filling the air with the smell of your split soap. He was done in a flash, spinning around on his heel with a smile, "All done gorgeous, the shower is all yours."

You grinned and stepped towards him, "Thank you, my brave knight. As a thank you, I'll even let you get whatever you want, and then maybe later tonight we can.." You raised an eyebrow and let the thought dangle.

"That's fair. Go clean up, you look cold." He could see the gooseflesh on your skin, and his warm hand on your forearm made you realise how cold you were.

You smiled and pecked his cheek, "Thank you Terry, you are wonderful."

He smiled and returned the gesture, his bread scratching your skin, "Anything for you Doll."

****

Terry ordered Pizza for dinner, traditional for you and meat lovers for him. He even got Pana Cota for dessert. You were cuddling on the couch, watching some action movie while Terry stroked your hair. The film wound down and you stood up and stretched out your hand, "It's late my love, shall we take this to the bedroom."

Terry smiled, "I'd like that." He took your hand and followed you to the bedroom, his smile turning to a grin as you locked the door behind him.

You pressed your lips to his neck, and Terry's hand rested on your shoulder as your fingers gripped the hem of his shirt. He helped you pull it over his head, and your lips moved from his neck to his chest, kissing the dusting of hair before your hand slid down his body to cup his half hard cock.

Terry groaned as you made your way lower, stopping to lick his skin ever so often until you were on your knees before him. His hands held your head as you pecked down his happy trail, his pants following his boxers to the floor as his cock sprung free, "If a bug in my bathroom leads to this, I'm happy."

Terry chuckled, "You and me both." You kept eye contact as you licked a stripe from tip to base and back again and his thumb stroked your cheek lovingly. You kitten licked the tip until his breathing picked up and took him into your mouth, focusing on the head as Terry groaned.

"That's is Doll, you're so fucking good at that." His voice was tight and you took that as a sign to take him deeper while one hand went to his hip and the other went to play with his balls.

Terry's jaw clenched and he locked his knees as you rolled his balls in your hand, "Fucking hell, you're going to kill me one day."

You gave him an mmhhh and a quiet fuck slipped through his lips. You pulled back and returned to the kitten licks, Terry chuckling as you looked up at him with mischief in your eyes, "I thought you were thanking me."

You smiled up at him, "I am don't worry." You made him eat his words as you took him down as far as you could and Terry did all he could so stop himself from doubling over.

He felt the edge approach in a growing wave and tapped your cheek to warn you, moaning gratefully when you stayed where you were. It happened from one breath to another, the climax overtaking him in a rush as you held his balls closer to his body.

You pulled back and wiped your mouth with the back of your hand and Terry helped you up with a sleepy grin, "You are amazing Doll."

His nose bumped yours as he kissed you, unfazed by his taste on your lips, "I love you."

He pulled you closer, lust coming over his face again, "I love you too, now can I make you feel good?"

"Yes please." He led you to the bed and ran a hand from your neck to the hem of your shirt, pulling it over your head and taking you in with hooded eyes, "You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen."

You went to respond but he kissed your words away and slid both hands down your body to pull down your sleep shirt. He stepped towards the bed and your legs bent as the backs of your knees hit the edge, "My mouth or my fingers?"

"Your fingers please." You shuffled up the bed and laid on your side, waiting for Terry to follow you. He threw your leg over his hip and took your face his hand, pulling you in a kiss as his hand slid off your cheek and down your body. He stopped to his brush his thumb over your nipple and swallowed your grasp as he rolled it in his fingers.

His hand moved from your breast to your waist and then your hip and he paused before he reached your centre, "Can I?"

You nodded, "Yes please." He pulled your closer before his fingers slid through your wet slit and Terry grunted when you bucked your hips towards his hand.

"I love you so much y/n." His lips found yours as he slid one then two fingers inside you and his thumb found your clit. He started slow at first, seeking out your G-spot with skilful fingers as his thumb circled in a way he knew would make you see stars.

His voice was soft as he spoke against your lips, "You're so good for me, I love you so much."

"I love you too Terry." He stroked your G-spot and with two more circles of his fingers, you were clenching your him with a moan.

He worked you down slowly, his fingers gradually stopping as you caught your breath. "You good Doll?" You nodded and he pulled his hand away, taking his fingers into his mouth with a groan, "I am one lucky man."

You sighed, "Hey, I'm pretty lucky too." He hopped up and headed to the bathroom, returned with a cloth to clean you up and smiled against your skin as you wove your hands into his hair, still damp from his earlier shower to kiss him, "You ready for bed?"

He shook his head softly, threw the towel in the hamper, and slid into bed next to you, "Move in with me."

You huffed, "We've been over this before Terry, your rich WASPS neighbours are worse than the rats and roaches."

Terry pulled you close and buried his face in your neck, "And not coming home to you is even worse than that. You know you won't regret it."

You sighed, "Alright, it's not like it was going to take much convincing, aside from your neighbours, I do like you place."

Terry grinned, "That's what I wanted to hear." He reached over and switched off the light and darkness filled the room.

You pressed your lips to his, and Terry pulled you as close as you could get, "Goodnight Doll, I love you."

"Goodnight Terry, I love you too."

Fin

[transmutationisms]

might be a long shot but i think i remember u mentioning the article "against exercise" by mark greif & was wondering if u might have a link 2 an un-paywalled version or a pdf you'd be willing 2 share? the n+1 mag has a paywall that 12ft ladder can't get rid of...not sure if it's published elsewhere 4 free but i'm struggling 2 find it so thought it couldn't hurt 2 ask!

yes verso books has it posted for free :-)

The gym resembles a voluntary hospital. Its staff members are also its patients. Some machines put you in a traction you can escape. Others undo the imprisonment of a respirator, cuing you to pump your lungs yourself, and tracking your heart rate on a display. Aided even by a love that can develop for your pains, this self-testing becomes second nature. The curious compilation of numbers that you are becomes an aspect of your freedom, sometimes the most important, even more preoccupying than your thoughts or dreams. You discover what high numbers you can become, and how immortal. For you, high roller, will live forever. You are eternally maintained. The justification for the total scope of the responsibility to exercise is health. A further extension of the counting habit of exercise gives a precise economic character to health. It determines the anticipated numbers for the days and hours of one’s life. Today we really can preserve ourselves for a much longer time. The means of preservation are reliable and cheap. The haste to live one’s mortal life diminishes. The temptation toward perpetual preservation grows. We preserve the living corpse in an optimal state, not so we may do something with it, but for its own good feelings of eternal fitness, confidence, and safety. We hoard our capital to earn interest, and subsist each day on crusts of bread. But no one will inherit our good health after we’ve gone. The hours of life maintenance vanish with the person. The person who does not exercise, in our current conception, is a slow suicide. He fails to take responsibility for his life. He doesn’t labor strenuously to forestall his death. Therefore we begin to think he causes it. It may be a comfort to remember when one of your parents’ acquaintances dies that he did not eat well or failed to take up running. The nonexerciser is lumped with other unfortunates whom we socially dis- count. Their lives are worth a percentage of our own, through their own neglect. Their value is compromised by the failure to ensure the fullest term of possible physical existence. The nonexerciser joins all the unfit: the slow, the elderly, the hopeless, and the poor. “Don’t you want to ��live’?” we say. No answer of theirs could satisfy us.

[akwolfgrl]

My frist one piece fan fic, I hope it's good. Any feed back is welcome and wanted. I don't have any friends into this anime. Part 1 LFT

Zoro rested his back against the wall of the galley, his arms crossed over his chest as observed their newest member, the blond, had been of help during arlong park battle. His kicks a powerful weapon of destruction. His flexibility and agility, Zoro couldn't move that way. He couldn't help but wonder if the cook could put that to good use in the bedroom.

"I'm surprised at how good smells in here," Zoro couldn't resist the need to tease the blond.

"Dinners not ready yet, if you want to add your likes and dislikes the list is the table, if your hare to steal a bite you can think fucking again swordsmen, I won't hesitate to kick you out literally," He hadn't even bothered to turn around, cigarette smoke filled the air above his head.

Zoro pushed himself off the wall and wandered over the table, a dark blue notebook and a blue feathered pen. Zoro took a seat and flipped through the book until he found his name. There wasn't much on there, just the fact he liked sake. Zoro hadn't expected the prissy cook to go this far in making sure the crew was well fed, once again Luffy somehow knew what he was doing.

"Oi, shit cook whatcha making?" Zoro asked as he filled out the notebook.

"Fuck off," Cook swore at at beofre replying to his answer. "I'm making bouillabaisse with rouille, and chocolate souffle for dessert,"

"First what the fuck is a what ever said, I don't think that will be enough for Luffy, I don't like chocolate so skip mine," Zoro thought chocolate was far to sweet for his liking. He didn't know what souffle was, to be honest.

"Bouillabaisse is a fishmen fish stew, rouille is just something that goes on top of the crusty bread you use to dip and soak up the stew with. I saw how much Luffy eats and I have a leg of lamb and roast chicken in the oven for him. No chocolate? Fuck your even weirder then I thought marimo, but that's easy to fix, what sounds better fruit or chesse?" Sanji asked.

"Chi, whatever curly brows, witch ever goes good with sake," Zoro replied, looking up at the blond man, what he wouldn't give to have his thighs wrapped around his head.

"Hmm, let me check something," The man stepped away from the stove and took a look into the fridge. Zoro got a great view of simmer man perfect ass he bent over to dig threw the fridge. "Cheese it is, a nice sharp chess will pair well with the sake on hand, that is if you didn't drink all!"

"I can't drink it all when you lock it up!" Zoro argued back, he enjoyed the banter between them. Sanji may be snobby, prissy and annoying but he was also strong, loud mouthed and swore like any good sailor worth their salt.

"Good that means it's working, are you done bugging me yet?" The cook asked, finally turning back to glare at him.

Zoro grinned and leaned up his hands behind his head. "I'm just getting comfortable, if you got a problem with that do something about it, but I have one last question for you," Zoro watched as Sanji stalked towards him cigarette smoke trailing behind him.

"And what's that?"

"Can you fuck as good as you fight?"

[greypetrel]

thank you for answering, here is my reaction request, feel free to deny it if it's something you don't feel like doing:

Dragon Age 2, between Acts 1 and 2. Mage!Hawke, Fenris, Varric, Aveline + whoever else you would like to include. FenHawke being the main focus:

Hawke faints while walking around Kirkwall, surprising everyone, eventually they find out Hawke has been starving themselves to make sure their family has enough to eat… I headcannon that magic and spellcasting consume a lot of the bodies natural resources, so mages need to consume more calories, hence why they like bread and cheese so much

Hello!

Sorry if I’m late, it took me a little thinking and I am generally a little intimidated from writing Fenhawke, as much as I love to read it. It feels like so much has been told already, but I eventually took the courage. Thank you for pushing me towards something I wouldn’t have done on my own, I hope you’ll like it!

I interpreted it as “how each would react seeing Hawke faint” and went with it. For Fenris, it’s a little ficlet. I had my fenrismancer Hawke in mind, but I tried not to make it too specifical for him. I only allowed myself one little concession, which is some terrible humour (and a reference to pop culture, let’s pretend in Kirkwall they know Backstreet Boys as a travelling band of dancing minstrels). Adding Sebastian too even if he's not recruited yet. It felt bad to leave only him out, and I think it'll be sweet to have him around. everything under the cut, because with no one's surprise, IT LONG.

Varric: “Hawke? Shit, Hawke! Don’t do this to me, you’re too heavy for me to bring you back.”

He will bring you back on his own if he has to. You’ll wake up in a room at the Hanged Man, with Varric and Anders in the room. Anders will sigh and bid you good morning, and comment that you have been lucky in not bumping your head against something. You just need to eat, and plenty. Before going, he will tease Varric about acting like a mother cat defending her kitten. Once alone, Varric will sigh and tiredly scold you: You only should have told him that you had trouble with food. Didn’t you trust him for help, already? After Bartrand, you’re a little like family, and he’ll love to help at least you. No, he’s not at all offering you a room and plenty of food because he may or may not have made you the main character of a thing he’s writing. Pointless slander.

Aveline: “Hawke? Hawke, wake up!”

She didn’t move you, in case you bumped your head too strong. She called a guard passing by to bring Anders here, you’re waiting for them to be back. She’ll ask you how you’re feeling, you fell down like a wet shirt and she got worried. You’re also looking pale, and she told you that you were overdoing it and she doesn’t want you to be sick and- Her rant gets interrupted by Anders. He heals you, checks that your skull isn’t in fact broken, does a check up. He frowns and tell you that you really need to eat. Aveline’s worry only grows: You’re not eating? Why? How? Why didn’t you ask for help? Of all the shenanigans and reckless things, she wasn’t expecting this. She grumbles, helping you stand and forcibly bringing you to the first inn in sight. On her: she never really thanked you for helping her out of Fereldan and into the city, this seems a good chance as any. And oh, the Guard Captain will know that people in Lowtown have no food. He’ll know it.

Anders: “What- Hawke!”

You’ll wake up with him glaring daggers at you, complaining that you’re an idiot, and you thought you could hide it with him? Oh no. He knows of being hungry, and you really only had to ask him. He’ll produce from his pocket a linen cloth with some homemade snack in it. It’s a bar made with cereals and honey and dried nuts: the wife of a patient gave some to him this morning, he’s happy he was late to meet you and he forgot the one he wanted to eat for breakfast in his pocket. He’s fine, he ate yesterday and you didn’t. He’ll urge you to eat: it’ll give you enough strength to make it home. He'll tell you that you can’t help anyone if you starve yourself: and that if you need help, you have friends to ask for. You can ask him, after all: you showed him your friendship more than once already, and he’d be glad to give something back.

Isabela: “Hey! It’s too soon for swooning!”

She managed to drag you into a shady corner, out of the way. She’s sitting beside you with a dagger out, to make sure no one gets any ideas. She’ll ask you if you made sweet dreams, and tease you that she’s beautiful, but you could at least contain yourself and avoid swooning. It was really embarrassing on your part and look, she was forced to show a conscience and that was very rude of you. She’ll tease you while fussing over you, and a joke after the other, it’ll turn out that you’re just hungry and not eat it. You can tell her, or your stomach will grumble. Her smile will turn sad, but she’ll cast everything off with a joke. That’s just it? You’re hungry? Why didn’t you say sooner! She knows just the place: the dirtiest hole in the Docks, it’s not the Hanged Man but it can hold its own. More interestingly, the innkeeper owes her a favour, and it’s surely lunchtime, somewhere. She could eat and she will: you can come with her if you’d like. She won’t make you feel bad one minute, and accepting her help will only seem like your own decision, not as pity.

Merrill: “Hawke? Hawke! Oh Mythal, no no no!”

You wake up with a balsamic smell in your nostrils: focusing, it’s Merrill’s hand, crushing some dried leaves with her fingers. Your feet are up on a wooden crate, and she rolled her scarf under your head as a makeshift pillow. She smiles when she sees you’re awake, and lowers her hand to start trafficking with her pouches. She tells you that she got worried, and didn’t know what to do. Thankfully you were close to the stalls she buys her fruit from, and she asked the kind lady that owns it for help to move you to the side. She also gave her the crate, you know that when you faint is very important to keep your feet up? So the blood can rush to your brain again, you need that more than your feet. Not to say that you won’t need your feet anymore! She fumbles with words, and soon enough you’re both laughing. She keeps smiling, and tells you that when people fainted, in the clan, the Keeper always said that some sugar was just what was needed. She picks some dried fruit from a pouch, and urges you to eat it: it’ll make you feel better right away, she’s sure. She dried the plums herself, and always carries them and some roasted nuts with her, as a snack. You can have it, come on. She gave you a full handful -your handful of it, but if you make her notice, not thanking her right away, she’ll casually shrug and say she can’t never tell with humans, you’re all so bigger than elves. Her pouch is already secured at her belt.

She’ll wait for you to eat and be ready to stand up again, chatting all the way about her clan, and what she did when someone was sick. She pushes on good food and plenty of rest, very casually. Once you’re ok, she’ll insist to stand by your side, and accompany you somewhere. She’ll suggest the Hanged Man -it’s close!- or Anders’ clinic, but will walk you home if you insist. Anywhere you go, you’ll be discreetely served food without an explanation. It’s not lunchtime, but people are eating with you. If you go home, the next morning there’ll be a basket full of groceries and food. No note, nothing at all: but a small pouch filled with more dried plums.

Sebastian: “Sweet Andraste, Hawke!”

You wake up in a shady corner, this time under the covering of a stall. He knew the stall-owner, they met in the Cathedral and prayed together. He sells cheese, here, you can have some, lad, it will make you feel better. Sebastian isn’t doting on you, properly, but he is helpful. He asks you if you’re feeling well, and if he can help. Please let him help, it’s the least he can do to repay you from your kindness. Pointing out to him that he doesn’t have to do it, you didn’t help him to have anything in return will make him sigh, heavily. It’s with the utmost seriousness and sincerity that he’ll answer, promising you that he’ll help you nonetheless. Not only because the Maker wants him to, but because your differences don’t matter much. He won’t leave any companion he spent time with in need. He may not be sure of what he wants to do in life, but he’s very sure that he wants to help you and show you some kindness. As you have shown him. Can he offer you something? Can he help? Your choice in accepting it or not: he won’t recognize what’s going on, but whether you want to be brought at home, to Anders or anywhere else, you have him by your side. He’ll stop by your house the next day to check you’re all right. The moment he’ll know you haven’t been eating? It’s not stealing from the Church if the food was meant to be shared with those in need.

Fixing a Hole (🎶)

[ FenHawke || No warning || 2389 words ]

And it really doesn't matter if I'm wrong, I'm right Where I belong, I'm right Where I belong See the people standing there who disagree and never win And wonder why they don't get in my door - Fixing a Hole, The Beatles

The world blurred first, and then it quickly became black.

“Hawke?”

It was the last thing Garrett heard, noticing with exhilaration what was happening. A last moment of clarity when he felt his limbs losing strengths and saw the world shifting. Fenris’ voice sounded alarmed, which only contributed to the excitement of the moment. Thankfully, everything went black and he lost conscience before he could blush.

He dreamt of the farm.

A sunset in early summer: the air was still warm from the long day, and the sun painted the wheat field in firey oranges and golds. Everything looked gold, and Garrett smiled at the sweet memory. He could smell the fields, the earth baked by the sun, and he knew that if he turned, he would have met with Bethany, leaning out of the windowsill and calling him for dinner. He longed to turn and see her, and at the same time knew he shouldn’t. It was still too painful, at least in his dreams, to see his little sister there, smiling. If only…

You can have it.

Someone whispered, voice brought by the wind. Garrett closed his eyes, away from the sunset, away from childhood and happiness. He had been happy, then: he didn’t fully realize until everything was lost. But it was not the first time he dreamt of home. A home where they thrived, a home where they had been happy, a home where he didn’t let Bethany die, and Carver hadn’t hopefully been killed by the Wardens he left him with. A home where he could look at his mother in the eyes without feeling blame and guilt creeping up his throat.

It wasn’t the first time and he knew what to do.

Take a deep breath, concentrate on how your chest rises and falls, on the sensation of air filling your lung. Stay in the moment, in the present, the past is gone and the future an illusion. The dirt under your feet, the smell of summer in the air, the warm caress of the last sunrays: they are gone, you can’t have it, they don’t exist anymore. They burnt and you couldn’t have done nothing to prevent it.

He concentrated on the good things he had: he was alive, his mother was alive, things were looking up and soon enough he would have sold everything and had the money to get a home for real. He had some friends, some real ones that knew he was a mage and he didn’t need to hide from. He loved them, and they loved him back. They wouldn’t want for him to stay there, lose himself in dreams. Kirkwall was nice, from the bazaar in Hightown the sunsets were pretty. Prettier, when he was there, leaning on the balcony and chatting with-

“You can have this. You can have me.”

He startled, his eyes opened as he felt a hand closing on his own. At his side, there was Fenris, looking at him with his usual serious expression. Something melted in his eyes, tho: something soft took place of the constant challenge he saw in them, the suspicion and mistrust. His heart did a double leap as he saw his lips curve up in a smile.

“You just need to say yes,love. And we can stay here. Forever. Far from Templars, far from Magisters. Far from guilt. It will be just as you want, and I will never leave your side.”

For the first time in years, Garrett felt tempted. He didn’t realize he had it so bad for the elf: he was good company, reliable in battle, and he liked him, sure. Physically, and his humour. He also knew it was impossible, between him being a mage and the other’s past. And now… He realized that yes. That was what he wanted. Something impossible in real life, and…

… Something was wrong.

The way Fenris turned, the way his lips opened in a wide smile, showing teeth, and he leaned so minutely towards him, still holding his hand.

“What about Danarius?” Garrett forced himself to ask.

“What about him? He doesn’t matter.”

“Don’t you want to get your freedom? End the chapter?”

“It doesn’t matter anymore. I have you, I’m happy like that.”

Garrett closed his eyes, the illusion clear as day in front of him. He held his hand, lingering on what never could have been for a moment still. It had been nice, until it lasted.

“He would never say that.” He opened his eyes and smiled at the demon. “And I would never say yes to him. Not in this way.”

He explained. Kindly, because it was just the way it was. Getting angry wouldn’t have brought him anyway.

The face of Fenris rippled and twisted in a snarl, the details got blurred.

I know your one desire.

“Oh well, as the wise man said.” He sighed, letting that hand go. It had started to grow talons and pinch uncomfortably against his own, anyway. “Ain’t nothing but a heartache.”

He quietly sang, stepping back and snapping his fingers.

Magic, at least, always came easier in dreams. He watched, as flames engulfed the demon, Fenris’ shape twisting and morphing, showing horns until he blinked, skin turning purple, teeth growing sharp. A piercing shriek filled the air, and soon enough everything was on fire. The wheat in the field, the old oak tree at the end of the courtyard, the chicken coop, the well and the farm, Bethany still on the window, frozen in place.

Would you set your own home on fire? The demon shrieked, in a last attempt at swaying him.

Garrett smiled, genuinely sorry for ruining the demon’s day like so. It was its nature, after all, and a part of him was grateful for the small glimpse of clarity it gifted him. It was easier to fight, if you knew your limits and what you wished.

“I already did.”

His eyes opened, and he looked blearily at… Wooden planks that looked old and like they were just about to crumble to dust.

Not the sky framed by Lowtown sandy buildings.

Weird.

“You’re awake.”

Garrett turned, blinking bleariness away. He didn’t recognize the place, but he recognized that voice.

Fenris was sitting on a stool, leaning his back against a wall whose paint was so scrapy and dirty that it could only mean that they were at the Hanged Man. For a moment, Garrett thought it was yet another dream. But the elf was typically grumpy, and frowned at him with an expression that was all too familiar.

“Am I?” He asked, still dubious.

“Hawke.” Fenris rolled his eyes, already exasperated.

It only made Hawke grin, calming down as he realized that it wasn’t, maybe, a dream. Only one way of knowing it. He just needed to wait for the right occasion for it.

“Where are we?” He asked instead.

“The Hanged Man. You fainted on the street, we were close.”

“You brought me all the way up here? I’m flattered.”

“So little you think of me, to believe I would have left you in the middle of a street?”

Hawke turned to his side, to face him better. His head still spinned something nasty, and he knew that standing up would not have done him any good. He saw one too many patients in Anders’ clinic to know that he would have had to be dragged up to bed again. It wasn’t a particularly appealing option. Or well, it was, but the context was wrong, and as many things he would have joked about, that wasn’t one. So, he just settled down better, and looked at Fenris in front of him, turning serious.

“I do not. But thank you anyway.”

“For what?”

“For staying.”

He saw the other scoffing, averting his eyes to the side and shrugging it off with a remark on how irresponsible it would have been, after a whole year of looking up for one another in battle. It brought a smile on Garrett’s face.

“How are you feeling?” Fenris asked, after a while.

“I’ll be good, I just need to lie down a bit.”

“Hawke.”

“I swear! I’ll take a nap and be as good as new. Nothing happened.”

“Hawke.”

“What’s the worse it can happen? Maybe I’ll die, so what. Everybody dies, sooner or later, is just another part of life. Never understood why people are so scared about it… I’ll be one Mage less, at least.”

“Hawke.”

There, the chance. He didn’t think about why that “Hawke” sounded different. It was all typical, but…

“Do me a favour.” He asked him, sighing as he rolled back heavily on his back. “When I die, cremate me.”

“Are you-”

“It’ll be my last chance to have a smokin’ hot body, after all.”

He arched his back, stretching just for show. The low, exasperated groan that followed was part a victory, part a relief. It wasn’t the Fade after all. In the Fade, all the demons laughed at his jokes, they were a great appreciative public.

“If you’re jesting, it means you’re feeling better.”

Hawke turned, grinning from one ear to the other as the elf, in a clear complaint, kicked back the stool and rose up. He saw the faintest trace of a smile on his face, and it was then impossible to pretend he was sorry.

“Leaving me so soon? All by myself? What if I die.”

“I’ll risk having you on my conscience.”

He reached the door and opened it, placing half a step on the threshold. He hesitated then, eyes lost fixating on something in front of him and brows furrowed in thoughts. Hawke stayed there, not that there was much choice but that.

“I am not so cruel as to leave you in such a state.” He said, finally, as if each word burned in his throat. He turned towards Hawke, still a crease between his brows that wasn’t totally obscured by a silver lock of hair. “I know we have… Our differences, but the next time, please tell me.”

Hawke frowned at that.

“Tell you what?”

He couldn’t know, could he? He would expect Anders to notice, or Merrill. People with experience in treating others. Surely not the broody warrior. As much as he tried to flirt with him, suddenly the idea of being so much in the open, so vulnerable and raw, scared him. He swallowed, not daring lowering his eyes first.

“Just tell me, Hawke.”

He didn’t say another word: just nodded to the side, casting him a look that was all too eloquent, and on another person, another less broody and aloof person could almost have been taken for worry, went out the room, without a word more or waiting for an answer.

Hawke turned on his back and groaned aloud, covering his face with both hands. Of all the people he could faint in front of, it just had to be Fenris. His typical luck. The one he shily wanted to impress, and the one that he didn’t really feel like he could complain about his situation without sounding whiny about it.

He wondered how he was gonna pay for the room.

He wondered, a little later, how was he gonna pay for the full meal that was brought inside the room. Steaming soup, a whole roast with vegetables, drowned in gravy on the small table before he could protest. Peas and potatoes with a thick slice of ham. Two pints of beer.

Hawke almost fell ashamed, but it was a fleeting moment. Fenris shrugged, as he took a big gulp from the tank and scrunched his nose in disgust, glaring at the offending beverage. It broke the tension, and soon enough they both were eating and drinking, friendly arguing about whether beer or wine was better. Hawke laughing and Fenris smiling.

“Fenris?” Hawke asked, in the end when conversation has naturally ended and he felt better, both physically than emotionally.

“Yes?”

“I do not think you’re cruel.” A pause. “I never did.”

An eyebrow rose in his direction, skeptical, as the only answer he got.

“You just have shitty opinions about us mages, but cruel? Nah.”

He huffed, shrugging it off, and rose again, changing the topic abruptly and informing him it was time for him to go. And that the room had been taken care of and not to worry about it. He could stay until the next morning. A pang of guilt and shame rose back in Hawke’s throat, but he nodded, without complaining.

“The next time you feel like I need to change my mind, please find better ways to prove it.” The elf told him, helping him out the bed when Hawke insisted to at least rise up to bid him goodbye. With his belly finally full after days, he felt strong enough for it.

“Were you worried?” Hawke meant it as a mock, but it slipped out of his lips without a bite. It sounded all too hopeful for his tastes and he would have bonked his head against the wall.

“Yes.” Fenris just replied, seriously enough.

“Ah.” He averted his eyes, embarrassed. “Well, I’m sorry and… Thank you, I mean, for helping me. You didn’t have to.”

There was silence, for a full minute, heavy and tense. Or maybe it was Hawke reading too much into it, as the topic fell dangerously close to feelings and crushes he knew were totally one-sided and would never have been reciprocated.

“I am of the understanding, that helping is one of the basic requirements of friends.” Fenris finally spoke. “It would be pointless to be so lucky as to have some, without accepting help in return.”

He patted, quickly, his shoulder, and nodded a goodbye, leaving him for the night. Hawke, smiling again, stepped out of the door, watching his back as he strode down the corridor.

“Fenris?”

“Yes?” He stopped and turned.

“Is the mysterious benefactor that paid for this Varric, or is it you?”

Fenris bent one corner of his mouth.

“I promised not to tell. But I’d order the lobster for breakfast.”

Garrett Hawke hated Kirkwall. He missed the countryside, the wheat fields and the pumpkin patch, fresh vegetables and a clean stream. Today, tho, he hated it a little less, and let hope bloom in his chest.

[sjsmith56]

Two Steps to the Left - Part 2

Summary: The interrogation of Arnim Zola gets the information needed for Steve and Bucky to perform their mission of retrieving the serum.

Length: 3.6K

Characters: Colonel Phillips, Arnim Zola, Peggy Carter, Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes.

Warnings: Arnim Zola (lying POS), WW2 Bucky feeling left out of the loop.

Author notes: Bucky is starting to believe in his abilities and that he won’t become something dark, but there is still some mistrust.

<<Part 1

🪖 🪖

Interrogation Room

Knowing that Zola would have to be interrogated again on the subject of how much serum had been given to Bucky was the next step to be completed before the Howling Commandos could undertake the mission to retrieve the serum.  Although the voice said that Bucky and Steve could retrieve it together, even he admitted the mission stood a better chance of success if the whole team was involved.  The Colonel made it very clear that he would find out the dosage, especially now that he knew the diminutive doctor was a shrewd and manipulative character. 

With Peggy Carter beside him, they entered Zola's cell.  This time, the Colonel brought a tray of food better suited to the doctor's preferred vegetarian diet, lentil soup, whole grain bread and a jar of Marmite, along with a glass of tomato juice.  It was gratifying to see how Zola's eyes widened at the sight of the meal, considering how many previous meals he had barely nibbled at.  The Colonel pushed the tray towards him, smiling genially at the man, while Carter watched from the corner of the room.

"You took the trouble of making a vegetarian meal for me, Colonel?  I appreciate it."

"Well, we're not cruel, Dr. Zola," answered Phillips.  "You do need sustenance.  The cook tells me the lentil soup is quite good and that marmite, although an acquired taste, is liked by many of the Brits.  Go ahead, please, eat."  Zola took several spoonfuls of the soup, smiled and took another before looking up at the commanding officer.  "I do have some questions for you."

"I assumed as much," said Zola.  "What do you wish to know?"

"Exactly what did you do to Sergeant Barnes when he was your prisoner at the HYDRA factory?"

A slight hesitation as Zola lifted the spoon was the only indication that he hadn't expected that question.  Without making eye contact he responded.

"What makes you think I did anything to him?  Has he said anything?"

"No, nothing specific other than you experimented on some of the prisoners, but his behaviour has drawn some attention and after what happened last night ... well, let's just say the Sergeant may not finish the war in uniform."

Phillips and Carter observed the doctor carefully as he processed what was just said.  Putting his spoon down he opened the jar of Marmite and spread a thin layer on the bread, then bit into it, chewing it slowly, before sipping some of the tomato juice.  Only then did he look at the pair.

"What exactly happened?  I am a medical doctor.  Perhaps I can help."

"I doubt that," drawled the Colonel.  "Our doctors are sure it was something you did to him that put him in this state.  Quite frankly, after seeing what he is capable of most of them don't think he can be helped.  They wish to ship Barnes back to a nice psychiatric facility in the States, where he won't be a danger to anyone, except himself."

"He hurt someone?  That is most unfortunate."  Zola took a few more sips of his juice.  "We did give the Sergeant a new medication when we realized he was suffering from pneumonia.  Perhaps, it is a delayed reaction to it?"

"Like penicillin, you mean?" Carter spoke, then shook her head.  "It was over a year ago, Doctor.  I doubt the body would react to a medication that long after it was administered.  At least, that's what our doctors said.  Steve ... I mean Captain Rogers said it was like he was fighting ...."  She looked at the Colonel.  "Sorry, sir, it just slipped out."

Zola studied the looks between them, at the obvious way the Colonel glared at the woman for admitting that Barnes fought Captain America.  His mind whirled with excitement.  Even more than a year after the last serum treatment the benefits were still present in the Sergeant, enough for him to possibly injure the one man who had been a thorn in HYDRA's side since he rescued all those soldiers.  It was imperative that the Sergeant receive the remaining serum, as well as completing the reconditioning treatment to turn him into the Winter Soldier.  They wouldn't let him free to return to his lab but perhaps he could convince them to get the serum here.  The reconditioning treatment could be done later, after Barnes had received most of the serum, but not enough to lock the effects permanently which would prevent the reprogramming of the soldier's brain.  With the several HYDRA moles already in place in the American military, a memory suppression machine could even be set up at an allied base and the Sergeant's treatment continued in secret without the Allies even being aware of their true nature.  Without even thinking the doctor took an energizing breath then realized the pair were looking at him strangely.

"Doctor, is there something you're not telling us?"

Phillips' stare bore into the doctor.

"Well, yes," he stammered, pretending to be telling them this information, reluctantly.  "We did give the Sergeant an experimental treatment; nothing that harmed him, I assure you.  In fact, it was something similar to Dr. Erskine's initial plan for his serum; something that could help the human body heal itself quicker and more efficiently.  It seemed to do wonders for the Sergeant who was frankly in danger of dying but it was interrupted before it could be completed by the arrival of Captain America and the rescue of all the soldiers at the factory.  Perhaps, his body is at a stage of withdrawal where he needs the balance of the treatment."

"You mean you also have a serum like Dr. Erskine's?" asked Phillips, trying to add some excitement to his manner.  "How much does he need to complete the treatment?  I know how many vials we injected into Captain Rogers to achieve the results of his."

"Yes, I do, but you needed to infuse him with Vita Radiation after to activate the serum, am I correct?" countered Zola, effectively admitting he had access to intelligence on Project Rebirth.  "My serum does not require the radiation although I suppose it would draw out every last benefit if it were done all at once as the Captain's was.  We injected it on a daily schedule, with the initial plan to extend it to six months, allowing the body to adjust at a slower pace.  If, by the young lady's admittance, Sergeant Barnes was strong enough to affect Captain Rogers during an encounter, I would think we could double the dosage.  However, the serum is all in a lab in Germany.  Without it, I anticipate that the Sergeant's behaviour will continue to deteriorate."  He shook his head sadly, making sure he appeared to be concerned about Barnes' health.  "Such a sad outcome for a fine young man."

"How much serum are we talking about, Doctor?"  Phillips looked at him.  "Perhaps, we can send a team to retrieve it and bring back enough for the Sergeant.  I agree that the prospect of sentencing Sergeant Barnes to a lifetime in a psychiatric facility for what is obviously a medical issue vexes me."

"Perhaps I could trouble you for a pencil and paper," smiled Zola.

Peggy Carter stifled the ill feeling that Zola's smile brought up in her.  It was enough to make her vomit.  She reached inside her pocket and pulled out a small pad of paper as well as a pencil, placing it on the table in front of the doctor.  As he drew it in closer and began to make calculations she stole a look at Phillips.  He seemed ready to lean over and knock the doctor's head off but glanced at her before resuming his troubled commander look.  After several minutes of calculations Zola wrote something down on several clean sheets of paper and pushed them towards the Colonel.

"There, that is my best calculation of how much serum Sergeant Barnes needs to lock in the benefits of the serum and be at a fully operational status.  I have also provided you with the location of my lab, along with the lock combination to get in and out quickly as time is of the essence if we wish to relieve the Sergeant of his dilemma."  Phillips reached out to take the slips.  "I only ask one thing."  Phillips stopped then looked at Zola without changing the position of his head.  "I wish to be present while he is undergoing the treatment.  I understand he doesn't trust me but as a doctor and a scientist, I feel it is important for me to be there for what is sure to be a momentous occasion."

Phillips grasped the papers then stood up and looked at the doctor.  "Of course, I'm sure we can come to some sort of arrangement."  He waved the slip of papers like he would a flag.  "Thank you, Doctor.  You've been most cooperative, and I'll make sure to tell my superiors that.  Enjoy your meal."

Phillips and Carter exited the interrogation room, where a trusted SSR captain and an MP waited.

"Once he's finished eating, I want him moved to another location," ordered Phillips.  "We're certain there are HYDRA agents in sensitive positions in both the American and British military so find the most innocuous installation and transport him there where he can't contact anyone or be tracked.  If Army Intelligence comes looking for him, I want them to know they have HYDRA moles that must be neutralized first.  Once you find that place you send me a coded location message.  I will reply when our mission has been accomplished."

Both soldiers saluted as the Colonel and Carter left with the location of Zola's lab and the amount of serum needed.  In the jeep on the way to the airfield where the Howling Commandos waited, they said nothing, as the driver wasn't cleared to hear any top-secret information.  He dropped them off in front of the stolen German aircraft, then drove a short distance away as Steve, dressed incognito and Bucky approached the Colonel and Peggy.  Handing them the information he gazed at Bucky with concern.

"Zola said the schedule for your dosage could be doubled but it would still take weeks.  He didn't disagree that all the serum could be given in concert with the Vita-Ray radiation treatment.  Seemed to think it would draw out every last benefit.  What does your voice say to that?"

Bucky waited for his counterpart's voice to make itself known.  Just as he was about to tell Phillips that the voice wasn't answering he heard him.

"Theoretically it should work just as Steve's did, but it is a copy of the original incomplete formula that was used on Schmidt, which is why they had to inject you over a period of time.  My medical colleague here would be willing to come and supervise the process, but he can't guarantee the results.  It would also have to be in secret because his appearance may cause concern."

"He can come here?" Bucky repeated.  "Would you come as well?"

There was no answer for a long time then he heard his voice.  "I'm not sure that's a good idea but my medical colleague says he would feel easier if I was there with him, just in case.  It's your call, Bucky."

Everyone was looking at him.  The whole balance of the mission was on him, a sergeant with some unstable serum setting up shop in his body.  Removing it wasn't an option.  His only real choice was to take the full treatment, but something was coming soon that he would be needed for, so the treatment had to be sped up.  He looked at Steve, whose impassive face showed that this was Bucky's decision.  He wasn't going to pressure him in any way, but he would support his friend, like he had done since Bucky finally confided in him.

"Alright, I'll undergo the same treatment," he said to the Colonel.  "The voice said he and a medical colleague are coming to supervise it, but it will have to be a secret location because of the colleague's appearance.  He also can't guarantee the results."

"Very well," said the Colonel, without question.  "While you're away, I'll contact Stark to set up the radiation chamber in a new location.  When you return, we'll go there.  Does your counterpart need any advance notice?"

"No, just let us know where the place is and when, and we'll be there.  Bucky?  No heroics from you and Steve on this.  No matter what you might see there, don't interfere.  Just go in and out then come back.  Got it?"

"Understood," he replied, then looked at everyone.  "Let's go."

As the aircraft took off, Colonel Phillips and Peggy Carter looked at each other, hoping this would go to plan.  The driver was waved over, and the pair climbed into the jeep to be taken back to their base.

The Mission

As the Commandos looked at the camp in front of them, Bucky repeated what his future counterpart said about getting in and out of the lab quickly.  They weren't to interfere with what was going on.

"What were his specific words?" Steve looked at his friend.

"No heroics from you or me on this."  Bucky saw a grin appear on Steve's face.  "No, he was quite specific that we get in, get what we came for and get out."

"Yeah, but he didn't say the guys couldn't do some damage."  The superhero waved his hand at the obvious purpose of the facility, as the work crews of what were obviously civilians lined up while guards with snarling dogs on leashes approached them.  "There's nothing stopping them from creating a diversion that might also allow a lot of these prisoners to escape.  You and I won't be involved.  We'll already be inside the lab."  He raised his eyebrows.  "I think your future Bucky just wanted to make sure that you and I stayed on the most immediate task.  Remember, at first, he said we could do it alone.  Then he agreed the Commandos could come.  Why else would he say that?"

Shaking his head, Bucky waited for the voice to counter what Steve just said but he remained silent.  With a resigned breath, Bucky nodded his head, then rolled his eyes as Steve gleefully went to the others and gave them the go-ahead to implement a plan they had already drawn up.  He returned to Bucky's side with a grin, then pulled his black headgear on, the need to hide his true identity necessary.

"Ready?  Race you to the fence."

He took off, and Bucky groaned then ran after him, still dealing with the realization that he could keep up with Steve, at least for a time.  Just as he began to slow down, they reached their destination, and Steve jumped up to the top of the observation tower, tossing the two guards over like they were trash.  Bucky finished the job, punching them for good measure then tied them up.  Both men took the weapons with them.  Just as they reached the second tower an explosion at the far side of the facility drew the attention of every guard near them, sending them running towards the scene.  Steve jumped up to the top of the next tower and tossed those two guards over then landed on the other side of the fence, waiting for Bucky to finish them off.  Both men grasped hold of the wire and pulled it apart, allowing room for Bucky to get through.  They ran towards the administration buildings, stopping along the way as teams of soldiers ran towards the obvious sounds of a gun battle.  Just as they were about to run, a hand on Bucky's shoulder startled him and he whirled around ready to shoot.  The obvious prisoner stepped back, holding his hands up.

"American?" he asked.  "Rescue?"

"American, yes.  Rescue, no."  Bucky looked at the man's disappointment then unloaded all the weapons he took from the tower guards, grabbing them off of Steve as well, and giving them to the prisoner.  "Hole in the fence.  There."  He pointed towards the second tower.  "Escape.  Go."

With understanding in his eyes, the man gathered the weapons close then ran to a nearby building, where an outer door opened then closed as he entered.  A few moments later it opened again to several armed prisoners leading the others towards the second guard tower.  As they encountered other guards, they engaged them in battle then distributed their weapons amongst the others.  Returning his attention to Steve they ran towards the building where Zola said his lab was and entered it, finding the door to the lab locked with a combination lock set into the door.  They dialled the correct combination and opened it, turned on the light and looked for the locker where the serum was supposed to be stored.  Finding it, Steve broke that lock with his hands and opened the doors.  Both men gasped when they saw all the serum that was sitting there, dozens of cases with six vials in each container. 

"There's enough here for many men," said Steve.  "Bucky, we can't let them keep it and it's too much to safely carry."

"Fuck.  Hey!  What are we supposed to do with all this serum?" he cried out, wanting an answer from the voice.

There was no answer and once again he was faced with the dilemma of it being his decision.  Grabbing a satchel, he took out what was needed for himself, then added several more cases, grabbing some lab coats and stuffing them in to cushion the cases.  Steve did the same then looked at all the serum that was left.  Noticing a Bunsen burner attached to a gas outlet, Bucky opened the valve and several others fully as Steve did the same then they retreated to the door of the lab.  Lighting an emergency lantern that was just outside the door, Bucky tossed it inside, watching as the fire spread.  The two men glanced at each other then began running towards the hole in the fence, where dozens of prisoners were lined up to get out.  Ignoring them, they both pulled another portion of the wire fence apart and burst through followed by other prisoners.  After quickly leaving them behind, the two men ran to the rendezvous point where they were joined by rest of the Howling Commandos, spread between two stolen motor cars, their faces flush with the knowledge that they had destroyed a Nazi concentration camp.  Jumping inside the vehicles, the order was given to return to the aircraft.  Along the way a large explosion occurred behind them and both Steve and Bucky smiled at each other, knowing they were the cause of it.  Their pilot started up the aircraft as they abandoned the vehicles and clambered on, taxiing it to the end of the runway.

"We got company!"

Steve and Bucky both looked out the cockpit window at several trucks of German soldiers approaching them.  The pilot applied full throttle then lifted off well before they had set up their anti-aircraft weapons.  Circling towards the west they were soon approaching the border with France, taking some flak from the defences there.  After Gabe successfully contacted the base in England they were left alone as they flew over the channel and prepared to line up for the runway.  In all that time, the voice never spoke a word until just as the tires made contact with the pavement.

"Good work."

"Where were you?" asked Bucky.  "You seriously expected that Steve and I wouldn't help them?"

The Commandos watched, having been read in on Bucky's future counterpart.

"No, I never expected that, but you still had to stay on mission.  History just never knew that the Commandos and either of you were involved in this.  We had to keep it that way.  You were a mystery Allied unit that helped a bunch of prisoners escape from a concentration camp that was also a site for human experimentation.  It was always going to happen, but the circumstances dictated how, and I didn't have the information to tell you that."

Bucky grunted, slinking back into the bench as the aircraft taxied towards a far building.  They were being picked up far away from prying eyes, transported directly to a camp where Colonel Phillips would advise him where he had to go for the full treatment.  One more step completed since that first step to the left that started this whole thing.

"Bucky?"

"What?"

"It's hard to be out of the loop but if I tell you too much too soon, then there's a good chance we don't get the outcome we want.  When I get there, you and I will have a private talk and I'll tell you everything that I'm permitted to tell you."

"Alright, I guess.  Tell me something.  Is Steve in your future just as impulsive as he is now?"  There was no answer.  "Bucky?" 

Still no answer.  Why didn't he answer?  Better yet, why didn't Steve from the future have a connection to this Steve?  There was no time to dwell on that as the aircraft came to a stop and the exit door was opened.  But it was definitely something he was going to bring up to his counterpart.

Part 3>>

Series Masterlist

[fairytalewonders]

Cat Guessing Game

This is just something I wanted to do for fun - cat’s have been assigned different stereotypes about their coats of fur and what personality traits they have as such, so I want to see if people can guess the color of my cat’s fur based off of the descriptions I give of their personality or unique quirks. And there’s one secret lizard thrown in for the fun of it.

I’ll reply and if they get any right, but I won’t say how many. In a week’s time I’ll reboot with all of the correct answers. Let’s see how many correct guesses people get.

First up:

Apple Pie (Male)

Called Apple for short

A huge talker

Stubborn

Passive Aggressive

One of the smartest animals I’ve ever seen (We had to change all of the door handle to door knobs because he learned how to open the doors. He still knows how to open the door knobs but can’t because he doesn’t have thumbs.)

When he wants to sit on you, he will sit on you, you have no choice

Half-a-tail (The vet thinks the mother licked it off when cleaning him. No obvious signs of wounds. But I remember him having a full tail when he was born?)

Quote from mom - “I saw him leading a crusade into your room.”

Binx (Male)

A sweet himbo

Very vain (I can’t express to you how vain he is)

Likes to go for car rides

likes to eat bread, doesn’t want the meat with any sandwiches though. Just the bread.

Equal opportunist.

Gets sad if you don’t at least say hi when you walk past him.

Quote from mom - “He’s…. Special.”

Cheshire (Male)

Super sweet

The chilliest animal ever (will just let you pick him up and tote him around everywhere, but my mom says I get special privileges.)

A secret sadist (has tormented the Binx.)

Has the biggest eyes I have ever seen. (My brother says he looks like a crack addict.)

Causes mischief as a fun past time when bored

Chirps?

Quote from mom - “he can’t be the one tormenting Binx, look at his face.”

Mushu (Male - probably)

I have never gotten more attitude from an animal in my entire life. Which is saying something.

Lots of side-eye

Very chill

Doesn’t like loud noises

Lazy

Quote from mom - “I have more pictures of him than I do of my own kids.” (We haven’t even had him for a full year.)

Batsy (Female)

Runt of the litter, super tiny

Will launch herself at you without a second thought

Doesn’t like big cats

Super affectionate

Quote from mom - “She’s like a flying squirrel.”

Peaches (Male)

Super sweet

Quiet

Chill

Super affectionate

(Don’t know much about him yet, I kidnapped him from outside. He’s still recovering, super skinny, can count his ribs. But we’re working on it!)

Quote from mom - “No, I haven’t seen the stray cat recently.”

Now for this next section, this section is sadly for my babies that have already passed on, but I can’t do this and in good conscious leave them out

Crookshanks (Female)

Had asthma (Did not stop her from stealing other cats kittens [as far as she was concerned they were also her children, no matter what they looked like] and occasionally picking fights and somehow winning?)

Super sweet

Also the chilliest animal ever (It may be a competition between her and Cheshire)

Passive aggressive - (Whenever she was mad at me she would put her butt in my face because she knew I didn’t like it.)

Quote from mom - “Sarah, come get your cat! She’s still the other cats kittens again!”

Tiger (Male)

Blind

Super long for a cat

Skittish

Demanding when it comes to food (he stole my fries)

Vocal when it comes to asking for attention

Would always seek me out and follow me around even though he couldn’t really see me

Gypsy (Female) (My mom named her after our Romanian heritage. I wanted something Halloween based, but after she started called her that, she responded to it.)

Also a runt

Super quiet - loved her personal space

Follower me around everywhere

Didn’t like being held

(Didn’t live very long due to health issues)

Quote from mom - “Well, she lets you hold her longer than anyone else, even if it is just for three seconds.”

Anyways, this is just for fun. I’m curious to see as to what people will answer. By the way, here’s a hint, none of these cats are purebreds.

[ro-botany]

I want to know who, if anyone, you ship Freddie with. I wanna hear all ur Frederick Fired Emblem opinions tbh--

HELLO I HAVE SO MANY OPINIONS ON THIS MAN

Probably too many opinions to fit in one ask!! To be honest!! I don't even really know why I imprinted on Fred so hard. It was the meme quote and the horse backflipping at first but at some point it became genuine fhdsjkfhds

Given that Fred strikes me as one of the older members of the cast his ship options were a bit limited for me lmao. But I ended up going with Fred/Cherche in my playthrough, and I stand by that! They don't have the most exciting support chain, I suppose, but there's so much mutual respect there. They meet each other on even footing in so many respects, and their S support feels like a very natural extension of the supports before it. Idk it's just cozy. They'll terrorize new recruits together forevermore.

Though I could easily leave him single, too. He strikes me as acespec, and while he can be a sap in S supports I also think he could be perfectly content never having a romantic partner. Maybe's that's me projecting but eh.

Some other opinions that I may elaborate on sometime include

I may not consider the spotpass chapters canon but I WILL NEVER RECOVER FROM HIS IN-BATTLE CONVERSATION WITH EMMERYN. I AM INCONSOLABLE...

I know we all joke about his out of left field arson streak but LISTEN. LISTEN TO ME. THAT CAN BE SO COMPELLING IF YOU TAKE IT SERIOUSLY FOR A SECOND. He may not necessarily have full blown pyromania, but if you humour that he might... Pyromania is an impulse control disorder. And often for someone with pyromania the starting of fires is a way to release tension or anxiety. Do you see how interesting this could be combined with how neurotically worried he is about the safety of his people, and how rigidly he controls himself, and how he keeps himself busy literally every single waking moment?

Between the potential pyromania (often caused by childhood abuse and neglect??? hello??) and the wolf attack trauma and the fact that he's now the razor-witted right hand of the goddamn prince, I'm super interested in this man's backstory. And the fact that 90% of the content we have about him is variations on being comedically overprotective of the royal siblings pains me sometimes. I love how ridiculous he is too, and I know flanderization is the curse all fire emblem side characters bear, but you can't just put these interesting breadcrumbs in front of me and expect me NOT to want to eat the loaf of bread they came from! I'm over here having to re-engineer this bread recipe my damn self! Give me the forbidden Fred lore intsys!

Frederick and Robin enemies to besties arc is criminally underutilized in fanfic and I need this problem resolved yesterday.

The fact that Frederick and Validar share their english voice actor is criminally underutilized in fanfic. We can use this as an excuse to make them sound similar in-universe! We can do angst with this, people!

The fact that his main hobbies are knitting and mushroom picking is adorable, actually. He's like if a grandma was capable of felling entire armies with a greataxe.

This is getting so long so I'm gonna stop there but listen. I will always answer questions about Frederick Fire Emblem. He is my boy and I love him.