#and you can laugh at me because despite rereading in multiple times

[frm9pm]

[fariesoiree]

Absolutely feral for the aphrodisiac chocolate drabble! what would have happened if you extended it into an entire fic? 👀👀 *wink wink*

hmmm should i? i usually don’t really plan on extending any of my drabbles n i actually don’t go back n reread them bc they’re vastly different from how i write now ( 2 me ) but that one gets a lot of love

that being saiddddd idk if i’d actually ever extend it but here’s a little something of what would happen later that day broken down into two liddol moments bc bc bc idk if i would write it and if i dooo i don’t wanna spoil it c: mdni black fem coded reader unedited

the car ride back to your university apartment. that had to be one of the most tense moments hobie has even been in, even when he compares it to all the times he’s spent flying through the air with multiple near misses from the amount of concrete rubble thrown at him from half human-half animal villains hellbent on ruining new york.

he is ultimately forced to next to you, breathing in the smell of your sweet perfume. today, he watched you spritz the yellow sol de janero —brazilian crush cheirosa 62 —bottle over your body, naked and highlighted in a dewy sheen from the baby oil you applied to your damp skin, fresh out the shower.

the thought makes his dick absolutely throb in his jeans, baggy but somehow still tight. he’s abandoned the mass of silvery and studded belts, throwing them across the backseat of your sedan. occasionally, when you slow for a red light or make a less than smooth turn around the corner, the buckles jingle and clank against each other.

his brain is muddied with images of your body, basking golden in the sunlight. he remembers lazing about, strewn across your bed and watching in adoration as you get ready for the outing. he’s mad at himself for not taking advantage of the opportunity and sweeping you off your feet, never mind that the aphrodisiac hadn’t had an effect.

“you sure you can’t pull over and give me head?”

your eyes are blown wide, truly in shock that after just fucking your face in the mall dressing room, he wants to go again. not even ten minutes ago, you were swallowing his cum and being dragged towards the exit promptly after. “what? hobie, i drive a fishbowl. that’s literally illegal.”

“so then pull somewhere empty. i’ll give you head, first. consider it a reward.” hobie thumbs at the bottom of your sweater, reaching over the middle console and hooking his fingers under the buttery smooth material. the pads of his appendages rubs against your skin and for a moment, your heart begins to race.

“hobart larry brown.” you have to force your voice to remain still and firm despite the turmoil building inside you. he’s too convincing with his sly words and suggestive touches. he’s the one under the influence and here he is, influencing you.

he clicks his tongue and disappointment and pulls his hand away. much like how you would, he huffs out a breath of air and crosses his arms over his chest. out the corner of your eye, you can see his legs wide open in a manspread. “fine. be a boring conformist.”

it’s comical how fast hobie pushed you through the entryway door to your apartment. you suppose you would have laughed when you stumbled over the long laces of your air forces if the context hadn’t been so provocative. you would have giggled when hobie circles his arms around your waist and lift you in the air. instead, you consider yourself lucky that your roommates aren’t in the common space to witness this, and possibly not here at all.

regardless, hobie would have done the same. he would have paraded into your room and slammed the door shut if they were here or not. he does it now, setting you down as gently as he can manage against your bed, softened by the mattress topper and flushed sheets.

he’s impatient and you can tell because he nearly forgets to lock the door behind him. had you not reminded him, pointing to the brass doorknob, it would have escaped him entirely.

it’s in record time that he’s got your legs spread and one pushed into the comforter, knee bent and trembling in the air. he slurps and suckles your cunt, dripping in runny arousal. hobie’s is relentless, stuck in an infinite cycle of trying to milk your cunt dry despite the never ending arousal that gushes out.

you can sob and cry all you want but he isn’t deterred. if anything, it’s encouragement. it’s like positive reinforcement to taste you like this, indulging in the subtle taste of sour acidity — completely natural and hobie’s favorite drug.

back arching of the sage green bedsheets, you’re body is already spent. hobie hasn’t put a single thing inside your throbbing pussy. not his dick, not his fingers, just the wet, warm muscle of his tongue wriggling and toying with your cunt. you’re delirious after cumming three times in the last few minutes, each weaker than the last.

“icanticanticant —!” your palm comes in contact with hobie’s coarse wicks, and not for the first time either. his forehead feels warm beneath it, clammy with a thin layer of sweat from exerting such physical activity.

pop! hobie’s hand falls hot against your skin. from between your legs, he lifts his head with a scowl. his face reflects an expression you’ve never seen on him before, as if you’re stepped between him and his greatest desire. “try that shit again, bug. see what i do to you.”

you’re hesitant to move, knowing that once you do, the onslaught of his tongue would proceed again. it just barely borders a dull sensation of pain and has you convinced there’s no more you can give him so quickly and back-to-back. still, your body has been manipulated into craving him. you need more; your nerves are certain of it.

you don’t move fast enough for hobie’s liking. his stare hardens and he raises a thick brow. you’re still restricting his access when he sits up a little more. “i’m not playing with your lil’ ass. move your fuckin’ hand or i’m tying them back.”

he’s never spoken to you this way, not once. not even in your most intimate and heated moments under the privacy of the night and locked away in one of your rooms. his tone invokes a carnal desire and you comply, slowly pulling your hand away.

you sort of expect praise, some form of acknowledgment that you did something right. yet, nothing like that comes. the only that happens is the resuming of hobie’s mouth against your cunt.

[hsgwrld]

BODY BAG - JAKE

-inspired by body bag - Chloe Moriondo

Pairing - classmate!jake x gn!reader

Genre - fluff,FLUFF!

word count -643

This is a revamp of the drabble I had on my previous account, to be honest,,idk why I even felt the urge to re-write it LMAO!! Can contain grammar mistakes! I was lazy to edit it fully.

That's it. You despised Shim Jake with every fiber of your being. The one-sided hatred towards him was nothing new. Ever since first grade, you harbored a dislike for him. It wasn't just about his grades, which always seemed to outshine yours, but also the way he looked at you, causing your heart to flutter uncomfortably. You detested that feeling intensely. Stupid Jake, for eliciting such emotions within you. He shouldn't have been your seatmate or even your classmate in the first place. On the first day of school, the teacher assigned him to sit next to you, and he hadn't changed seats all the way through high school. His way of speaking, smiling, and his sweet, bubbly personality only fueled your anger, exacerbating those irritating feelings.

And then there was Jake again. Did he leave a love letter in your backpack? Indeed, he did. Did you expect him to confess his feelings? Not at all. He was just a classmate, nothing more. But deep down, you felt yourself melting and screaming. Yet, the letter was written so beautifully that your heart skipped a beat each time you reread those words for the hundredth time. You kept it in your diary, rereading it as time passed.

"I have always liked you! Even though you've threatened to punch me in the face multiple times, I still like you." In disbelief, you looked at him, blinking five times. Did he really say that? Did he make you stop in the middle of the sidewalk and face him? After a while, was he following you? Sure, he did. Stupid Jake with his nice voice. It seriously made you want to punch him, yet at the same time, hug him tightly and squeeze the life out of him for being so cute.

"I like you too, Jake, but I still want to punch you." Jake's lips formed a smile, the kind you loved to see so often.

Jake had developed a new habit of taking your hand in his and playing with your fingers. Even now, as you both watched a movie at his house, you struggled to focus on the screen. You wanted to punch him for distracting you, but those stupid feelings intervened. The heat in your face didn't help; it only made you more flustered. Always blushing and stuttering when talking to him. Even though you'd been together for months now, he still made your heart pound loudly. As his lips drew closer to your face, you felt yourself slowly drifting away from reality. He left a small kiss on your cheek, a giggle escaping his lips as he observed your flustered state. It wasn't new to him to see you react that way, but he loved teasing you about it.

Your heart melted once again. Jake took you out to watch fireworks together by the river. He hugged you from behind with his head on your shoulder and his hands around your waist. The night breeze brushed against your face. It was a lovely feeling, despite the occasional squabbles between you two. He was your little sunshine, secretly brightening your days.

"I swear, Jake, I will punch you," you threatened, only for him to burst into laughter. The whipped cream on your face made you look too comical, and he couldn't take you seriously.

Jake convinced you to do a TikTok trend with him. At first, you thought it would be fun, but with whipped cream smeared all over your face, glaring at Jake said otherwise.

"Wow, you're so scary," he laughed, pulling out his phone to take a picture of you.

"Funny, very funny, Jake," you said while heading to the bathroom to clean your face. Even as you walked away, you could still hear Jake giggling from the living room, making you smile once again, all because of your stupid Jake.

[hanafubukki]

So who do you think would faint in the delivery of the baby? (Yes this is about your last post)

My bet is Sebek, he just got too surprised and was not ready when he just heard “Oh my water broke” second to Malleus, the weather changed so much because of him stressing over his friend he just had to be put to sleep temporarily, thunder does not go well with snow.

Lilia may not be a first time dad, after all he is the dad that stepped up. But he is certainly his first time with a delivering mother. He was probably in panic mode the whole time….and horrified by the way those holes extended, like dear god, that is not supposed to be shaped like that.

Unless they did C section, which I think it’s better….

Imagine it was twins, dear god.

Listen I just saw a bunch of shorts of mothers experience when delivering and I am both horrified and laughing. It doesn’t do any favors when I have a family member in that work line that tells some facts and stories at the table.

OH! And I saw a fic on AO3 about Lilia getting baby fever, hold on…

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26939872

Enjoy

[about this fic]

Hello Anonie 🌺🌸💞

Not you adding onto my baby fever Anonie 🤣😆

I think in a way they would all be panicking, but more internally. So it’s probably better to keep them away from the delivery room while giving birth 😂

If something such as “my water broke” made these boys faint?? I think their training regimen is going to become harder 😂😂

For Lilia, I can see it go multiple ways. I can see him worry about you and the baby. But he’s going to stay strong and be your support. I also imagine as he used to be a war general, something like giving birth wouldn’t cause him to faint either.

But I can also see him fidget and be hyper aware of everything, thinking of all the scenarios that could happen and what can be done. It’s your voice and your hand that grounds him as much as he grounds you.

But also on the opposite of that, I imagine this new experience for him is something he’s not ready for at all. No matter what anyone says or teaches him. Despite the stories from Mama Zigvolt or Baul. 😂

He’s worried about you and the baby, of all the stories he’s learned that could go wrong. He might try to joke a bit to distract you but you can tell he’s a worried from the desperate way he holds onto your hand as tightly as you do his. 🥺

But the relief and the joy he feels at the baby’s cry has him releasing a breath he didn’t know he was holding. 🥹💚

Oh Anonie, the stories I could tell you about both natural and c-section births 🤣

Just imagining seeing these boys being pale as if all blood was sucked out of them makes me laugh.

ALSO THAT FIC YOU RECOMMENDED

Shaking you Anonie!!

I KNOW THAT FIC VERY VERY WELL.

It’s one of the first stories I read of twst on ao3 and on tumblr made by the lovely @/streimiv and ahhhhh I adore the fic so so much and one of the reasons that Lilia gripped me back then too.

There’s a sequel!! Which you can read here. I would also recommend checking out Strei’s other works as well. So so amazing and beautiful.

In fact, I’m going to go reread them right now 🥰🥰💞💞💞

[jademickian]

oh man, haven't done tag games in a while, sorry friends 🥹 i've been passive the last few weeks because uni is really taking most of my time and energy, but i appreciate the tags and i love love reading your answers<3

ok enough blabbering, thank u @callivich, @lingy910y, and @mickeysgaymom for the totally optional, fun gallavich questions tag!

What’s a fic you’ve read more than once?

Stuck at Three for Days - delicious banter, laughed my ass off

another kiss is all it takes - so fuckin sweet, dude

Like Real People Do - just finished my reread last month:)) i needed the comfort

Cooperative Gameplay - currently rereading! i miss the feels

Sometimes I reread bits and pieces from ORFNSP and since we're alone because they changed my brain chemistry. I will eventually get around to actually rereading them.

2. What’s a gifset you always have to reblog?

You know the one... this legendary world heritage gifset

3. What’s a headcanon you can’t stop thinking about?

not sure if this is counted but i always like to think that once, ian got struck with grief about monica's death on her death anniversary. mickey asks him what's wrong and he opens up about it. ian will say it's stupid but mickey will truly handle it with grace and say nah man it's not. because yahknow, he gets it. and ian melts at it, because no one has acknowledged his grief like this before. mickey teases him about it a bit, sure, but deep down he held ian's mourning warmly, like petals on his palm. and they went together to the cemetery that day, simply sat in front of her grave and talked. the good things, the bad. and that despite it all "hey, tleast she popped out an alien lookin mfer i ended up marryin." they get pizza after.

4. What’s a fanart you love looking at?

Van kiss by @lingy910y

Prince Mononoke by @darthvaders-wife

Prison Boyfriends by @gallavichonly

Part of Our World by @steorie

It's Okay by WhatsaMattavich

This Kiss by @deathclassic

SO MANY others actually if i could fit them all here

5. What’s an idea you’d love to create if you had the time/inspiration?

i actually have a LIST lmao. one of those has something to do with art because i cannot take my mind away from human mickey and manananggal ian (manananggal is a Philippine myth creature with wings and can separate the upper half of its body from its lower half).

6. What’s something you’ve discovered since entering this fandom? A new trope you love? A different analysis of the show? Something else?

oh man. believe it or not, i was never into fics. i was in fandoms before, but i just couldn't get into fics within those fandoms (i tried). this is the only time i truly liked and LOVED reading fics. it really speaks volumes about the talent and dedication, and i'm glad i got to experience it.

it's also fun reading metas on the show and getting different perspectives, especially on characters. one of my favorites (just because i was so distressed about it the first time i watched it) are analyses on the city hall scene and ian's hesitation on marriage. after reading up others' thoughts on it explaining the why's, i totally felt some relief and was able to get some sleep. lol

7. What’s an underrated trope or concept you’d like to see more of?

apocalypse aus 👍

8. What’s your favourite season? And has this changed after multiple rewatches of the show?

The first five seasons are gems to me. but i truly love season 2 because it's so chill (at least compared to some of the heavier seasons after) and the gallaghers move as a unit. special mention for season 4 because it holds Emily and Lazarus.

9. What’s a plot hole you wish had been answered or resolved?

same qualms with @mickeysgaymom about mickey's mom. brain rotting over it.

10. What scene or moment do you feel isn’t discussed enough?

not gallavich related, and i'm sure people have already mentioned it, but sometimes it hits me how smart debbie is. like, i know she's smart, but people easily forget from all the chaos. at the heart of it, she's a fast learner and also would and have excelled academically.

11. What line/dialogue/description from something else (a poem, a book, a tv show, a movie, or something else) do you feel describes Ian and Mickey’s relationship?

aaaa @lingy910y beat me to it! it's totally "I'll take care of you. / It's rotten work. / Not to me. Not if it's you." but if i could pick another, maybe "I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell; I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world."

12. What do you think is next for Ian and Mickey post-finale?

they'll grow old together and be just as in love, no matter what happens in between.

tagging @mybrainismelted, @scurvgirl, and @lupeloto if u wanna join!! raahh

[linnitheo]

Against All Odds (Part 2)

Lewis Hamilton x Y/N

Y/N’s POV

You couldn’t believe what you were reading. Lewis Hamilton had just asked if you wanted to meet up before he left for his next race. You stared at your phone, rereading the message multiple times to make sure you hadn’t imagined it. This was beyond surreal.

After a moment of internal panic and excitement, you typed back a quick response: “I’d love to! Let me know when and where.”

Your hands trembled as you hit send. What would you even talk about? How were you going to handle this without completely embarrassing yourself? Despite the anxiety bubbling inside, there was also a part of you that felt… calm. Lewis didn’t seem like someone who would judge you, and after the kindness he’d shown in his previous message, you had no doubt that this wasn’t just a pity invite. He genuinely seemed interested in getting to know you.

A few minutes later, your phone buzzed again. “How about tonight? There’s a little place by the Thames that’s quiet. I could use the escape.”

You agreed, heart pounding in your chest. Tonight. You were going to meet Lewis Hamilton in person, one-on-one. The thought made you dizzy, but you quickly pulled yourself together. You had a few hours to get ready, and you were determined to make the most of this unexpected opportunity.

Lewis’ POV

Lewis sat back on the couch, glancing at his phone after sending the message. He wasn’t sure why he had reached out again. Maybe it was the way you had looked at him—like you saw the man behind the racing suit, behind the fame. There was something refreshing about that. Something he hadn’t experienced in a long time.

As he stared out of the window of his London hotel room, the city’s skyline illuminated in the distance, he felt a strange sense of anticipation. This wasn’t like meeting fans at events or signing autographs. It was something more personal. He wondered what you would be like in a quieter setting, away from the noise of the crowd and the cameras.

Part of him felt guilty for dragging you into his world. He had seen the backlash you were getting online. People assumed things about you, about your motives. He hated that side of fame—the assumptions, the cruelty, the lack of privacy. He didn’t want you to get hurt just because you’d had a chance encounter with him.

But something told him this was worth pursuing, even if it was just for one night of normalcy.

Y/N’s POV

Later that evening, you arrived at the spot Lewis had mentioned—a quaint little café near the river. The warm lights from inside cast a soft glow across the cobblestone street, and you could hear the faint sounds of jazz music playing in the background. You spotted Lewis at a corner table by the window, dressed casually in a black hoodie and a cap pulled low over his face. He looked completely different from the man on the racetrack, but there was no mistaking him.

As you approached, he looked up and smiled, standing to greet you. “Hey, you made it,” he said warmly, pulling out a chair for you.

“I almost didn’t believe it was real,” you admitted with a laugh, sitting down. “I feel like I’m in a dream.”

He chuckled. “It’s real, I promise. How have you been holding up? I saw some of the stuff online. I hope it hasn’t been too much.”

You appreciated the concern in his voice. “It’s… been a lot. But I’m okay. I didn’t expect any of this to happen.”

Lewis leaned back in his chair, looking out at the river. “I get it. I’m sorry you got pulled into it. People can be harsh when they don’t know the full story.”

There was a moment of silence as the two of you took in the peaceful surroundings. It felt strange, being here with him like this, but at the same time, it felt right. The conversation flowed easily, moving from the chaos of race weekends to more personal topics. You talked about your life, your job, your love for racing, and how you had admired Lewis for years—not just for his skills on the track, but for the way he used his platform to speak out on important issues.

Lewis listened intently, nodding along as you spoke. When it was his turn, he shared stories from his early career, about the pressure he had faced as the first Black driver in F1, about the sacrifices he had made along the way. He opened up in a way you hadn’t expected, and it made you realize that beneath the fame and success, he was just a person trying to navigate life like everyone else.

As the night went on, you both seemed to forget about the world outside. The hours slipped by unnoticed until the café was nearly empty, the soft hum of the city outside the only reminder that time was passing.

But just as you were about to suggest leaving, Lewis’ phone buzzed on the table. He glanced at the screen, his expression hardening slightly.

“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice taking on a serious tone. “Something’s come up.”

You watched as he quickly typed out a response, his face a mask of concentration. You couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment. You had been having such a great time, and now reality was crashing back in.

“It’s okay,” you said, trying to hide your disappointment. “I understand.”

But Lewis shook his head. “It’s not what you think. There’s some drama back at the team—something about the media running with a story about us.” He sighed, rubbing his forehead. “I thought we’d get away from all of that tonight.”

Your heart sank. “What kind of story?”

“Apparently, someone caught wind of us meeting up tonight. They’re spinning it into something more than it is. They’re saying you’re just using me for attention.” His voice was tight with frustration.

Your chest tightened. Of course, the media would twist things. You had prepared yourself for that, but hearing it from Lewis made it feel more real, more damaging.

“I didn’t mean to cause any trouble,” you said quietly, feeling a weight settle over you. “Maybe it’s better if we don’t—”

“No.” Lewis cut you off, his eyes locking with yours. “This isn’t your fault, and I don’t care what they say. I wanted to meet you, and I’m glad I did. I’m just… tired of all of this. The scrutiny. The constant judgment.”

You were about to respond when the door of the café suddenly swung open, and a man with a camera stepped inside. His eyes locked onto you and Lewis, and before you could react, the flash went off.

Lewis was on his feet in an instant, his hand gripping your arm protectively. “We need to go. Now.”

You barely had time to process what was happening before he was leading you out the back door, into the cool night air. Your heart raced as you followed him down a narrow alley, the sound of footsteps behind you growing fainter as you turned the corner.

When you finally stopped, Lewis turned to face you, his expression a mixture of frustration and apology. “I’m so sorry about this. I didn’t think anyone would find us here.”

“It’s not your fault,” you said, your voice steady despite the adrenaline still pumping through you. “I knew this could happen.”

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I just didn’t want to drag you into this mess.”

You smiled softly, taking a step closer to him. “I’m not scared, Lewis. I’m here because I want to be.”

For a moment, he just looked at you, his eyes searching yours as if trying to find something he hadn’t realized he was missing. Then, before you could react, he closed the distance between you, his lips brushing against yours in a soft, hesitant kiss.

When he pulled back, his eyes were filled with uncertainty, as if he wasn’t sure what to expect. But you smiled, your heart pounding in your chest for an entirely different reason now.

“I’m glad I met you too,” you whispered.

And for the first time that night, the chaos of the world around you seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of you, standing together against all odds.

To be continued…

[hancydrewfan]

Reasons I Love SequinSmile-x, For Her Birthday

I occasionally can write a lil fic, but only when inspiration hits at exactly the right moment. So I have no gift fic for my bestie @sequinsmile-x. Instead, I offer a list of reasons I love her with my whole heart including several of my favourite fics of hers. (below the cut, because I got a lil carried away in her honour)

When Tomorrow Begins, the tragic and beautiful EPIC SAGA of one incredible AU with impeccable flashbacks. Vic had just posted chapter eight of the sequel, If Tomorrow Starts Without Me, when I discovered this series I think two years ago. It remains a favourite that I am always thinking about all the time, especially since its gutwrenching, tearjerking, perfect conclusion last year, and I have reread it at least twice.

Martha, the most perfect beautiful angel of a cat. I do not have a cat, but I have a collection of my friends’ cats that I consider my babies and I will one day meet Martha in person and officially give her all the pets she absolutely deserves.

Tequila Confessions, which I guess I accidentally gave some ideas for and then she kindly gifted it to me (the first of many, including two of three follow-ups to TC!). This fic never fails to make me laugh and cry from laughing and I cherish it for starting a long tradition of me being a doofus and Vic running with my doofusness to create magic. (Again, I apologize for Invasion. I was runnin’ my mouth, that’s on me.)

A shared love of Tim Hortons, despite us being located in different continents. I have had many text conversations with her while walking home from therapy with an iced cap or a french vanilla in my hands and Midnights playing in my ears. A truly comforting friend even though there are many thousands of miles between us. Also because she’s British she uses the beautiful U in favourite and colour and honour and it makes me SO HAPPY. (this entry is about Canada-UK relations lol)

Love You In The Dark, another iNcReDiBLe AU fic where our intrepid heroes find each other in 1963. I know she worked so hard to get the setting right, and it can be a challenge to nail the voice and actions of characters in an era so unlike their own, but she friggin’ nailed it with this one. And it was also completely terrorizing when chapters ended on horrific cliffhangers you absolute freak. Also the way she incorporates canon details in AU fics makes me weep every time!! AND when she makes little easter egg connections to her previous fics, omg. I love puzzles and consider myself to be the human embodiment of Nancy Drew, so these kind of connections and secrets thrill me to no end.

HAVE YOU SEEN HOW CREATIVE THIS GAL IS??????? Friggin. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve screamed at her for sending a header she’s designed for an upcoming fic. And the fake insta posts???? Like wtf. The way she captures their voices in FAKE SOCIAL MEDIA. Stop being so good at everything (please don’t stop you are my lifeblood).

The Way Home, which actually I can’t even speak about because I’m still upset about the last chapter, you evil little pillbug.

She is so fun and so funny and so kind and so giving to this little fandom! We have a rich collection of hotchniss reads thanks to an incredible amount of talented writers, but sorry this post is about Vic and she posts new chapters and one shots multiple times a week, totalling well over a million words on ao3, despite having like a job and friends and a life outside of the internet. I am in awe, always.

okay sorry i’ll stop embarrassing you. love you vic and happy birthday!!!!!!

[birrdies]

hi i'm insane

Many months ago I read the first two parts of outbreak and I meant to send an ask or leave a comment about how they made me cry in the middle of the night but I was too shy. I recently read "everywhere, everything" for the first time (and ofc reread parts 1 and 2). Let me tell you. I am not the same person I was. Both reading experiences changed me. "It's okay. I'll be here when you wake up." OKAY how did you know the exact words to get me crying for at least half an hour?????? I'll say also when Etho and Grian were fighting at the boathouse I could SEE it so clearly, I could imagine the colour palette and the cold of the water, the physical and mental struggle, and I can't remember ever having a fic make me picture a scene like that before. I was there bro. I felt their loss and their pain. All the parts end so tragically but still managed to be satisfying.

DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON "oh captain (let's make a deal)" i reread that multiple times as well. I just might read it again. it's such a fun setting and the particular way you've captured Grian and Scar's dynamic over and over again really hits the nail on the head in my opinion. It's not easy to write! They are both pretty complex characters with an equally complex relationship.

I was offline for a little while so I saw you were working on something new a bit late, but "as above, so below" is great so far and I'm really looking forward to keeping up with it!!!! I was going to say smth about being willing to read a 100k monstrosity if it were written by you but judging by the current wordcount it might make it that far and I am more than okay with that. Despite the length I've never thought your work dragged or was a slog to get through at any point.

I left kudos on everything I've read and I'm so excited to keep up with anything new. Doesn't matter what. You have both insane skill and talent and I just had to say something as the conclusion of secret life and rereading the outbreak series put my brain in a fucking salad spinner and I had to voice my appreciation.

PEACE AND LOVE

BLOCK MEN SAVE THE WORLD

Hi Insane, I'm Dad < 3

Oh my goodness, hello! (I hope you don't mind me answering this to my blog it's just so precious and nice I want to keep it saved here forever...) I ashfugkh I don't know what else to say besides thank you!! Not only for your kind words, but it means so much to me that someone would take the time to not only read through the entirety of 'outbreak' but all my other fics as well. Because... well... you said it best, they can be a bit of a monstrosity in terms of length haha. Speaking of... (laughs nervously looking at my 'as above so below' document) you just may get your wish here... the final word count is a bit of a beast (118k) and while I do worry it's Too much, it means a lot that you'd be willing to even read that much from me. I appreciate YOU, PEACE AND LOVE!!! BLOCK MEN SAVE THE WORLD!! HELL YEAH

[ltcolonelcarter]

I don’t even know if there’s any LEFT IN THAT WRITER ASK. So I’m making up my own questions.

Has there been a particular theme or part of one of your stories that you wished got more attention? Like a one-liner that has you !!!! inside every time you reread it?

If you had an OC crossover, which would it be and why?

If you could will the vibes from any of your stories into real life, which one are you most likely to do? And why is it last call?

I LOVE YOU BABE!!! ♥️🧡💛💚💙💜I’ve got my knife ready, just waiting for you😌

send me a fanfic ask

OH YOU.

I got inundated in the BEST way. I had such a good time yelling about writing last night oh my gooood. I was a bit dizzy by the end of it. I owe so many people messy kisses. anyway

Has there been a particular theme or part of one of your stories that you wished got more attention? Like a one-liner that has you !!!! inside every time you reread it?

you’re gonna be able to predict this, but the themes in a question of time are jUST. I work so hard on it. the themes are so self-referential in places: it feels a little ridiculous to write sometimes but it’s like it’s spiralling in on itself. that was the feeling I wanted to capture.

I’m not sure the full picture of what I’m trying to do in aqot is even visible yet, really, because… you won’t see the view until I’ve published chapter 8. I have SO many references to previous events, a few new bits of information that… change… what’s already happened. I wanted to create that sense (in multiple places) of the world shifting in response to new information - that moment where you see stuff DIFFERENTLY and can’t go back. from the perspective of the writer it’s hard to measure how successful I’ve been so far, but… there should be another drop coming. I’m excited to see what everyone thinks.

There’s a few lines of dialogue I’ve written that just made me want to punch something in joy bc they captured the essence of a character, or the vibe that I wanted, really really well. I always forget them until I reread, so I’ll just give you a smattering of my favourites.

This moment in aqot stands out:

Connor didn’t validate the question with a response, which only inspired a white-hot fury in Sixty. “You deviated, Connor!” Sixty screamed. “You failed!” “No.” Despite the circumstances, Connor’s voice was low. Gentle. “I didn’t fail. My mission changed.”

I can see Sixty in this moment SO CLEARLY. I love the moment a character breaks, and this is that: he’s done this too much, failed too many times, it’s just the raw nerves left. he’s barrelling towards rock bottom and he still doesn’t understand. sigh. especially bc (spoiler) sixty has _such_ a habit of following in Connor’s footsteps

two, from let him hear:

“Well, he could be looking at me. How could I blame him when the view’s this good?” You shoot Sixty a look, aiming for withering. By the flash of teeth, you know you weren’t convincing. “But I doubt it.”

listen, I’m not too proud to tell you I laughed myself stupid when I wrote that. Literally like: yep, that’s Sixty, no editing required

You don’t need to look at Sixty’s face. His grin is unmistakable in every word. “Oh, I’ve definitely seen her.”

This one I had written when I was working on the PREMISE, before I’d even started the fic. I could HEAR him saying it, that slight laugh in his voice. still tickles me.

from last call I could honestly pick a lot, bc I worked on showing a lot of emotion in hopefully subtle ways, but these stand out:

He bows his head closer to you when he speaks in reply, voice quieter, almost lost to the noise of the room. “I will attempt to satisfy you.” You don’t have an answer for that.

he surprised me with that one

“A cure for curiosity,” he smiles at you, conspiratorial, and you pin him with a questioning stare. “At least, a temporary one.”

@staticl0ve pointed this one out in her LOVELY comment, but I was SO SO HAPPY with this line. it sounds so much like Connor to me.

He keeps you company until you’re feeling like yourself. When the rain starts falling heavily and you jolt away from the spray of cold droplets, he steps back into the rain to give you back your space; surprised, you watch him, the raindrops that trail down his face, through the soft strands of his hair, and notice he’s prioritising you over himself again.

You reach out and pull him back under the shelter until you’re standing, shoulder to shoulder, listening to the rain.

SIGH I live the quiet moments of character growth. this is her admitting to herself for the first time that she’s attached, but more than that, that she’d rather keep him close than keep her barriers up. that he’s worth being seen. I’m going to smash something I just need a minute

OH also: honourable mention to any time I use the title in-fic. It’s PURELY self indulgent. I fucking love that shit. if I was still publishing under anon I’m p sure it’d give me away.

I could probably five seventy more little moments I've written that I'm really, really happy with, but I've been gratuitously self indulgent already, so i'll finish with one last part: there are a lot of little moments in the echoes and reflections prologue that will (eventually) hold a lot more significance than they do at the moment. I have a lot of plans for that fic: it's not going to be happy barely at all, but I'm so so excited about the exploration of character. they're all going to such a dark place. shout out to @dattebae not only for writing the middle ground, the au on which this au is based, but for letting me play with her iteration of sixty. I am so utterly full of love and bewilderment at the trust. give me an hour I simply must kiss my wife

If you had an OC crossover, which would it be and why?

OC CROSSOVER ASGAJAGAGSHA okay sO for starters I need them all in a room together, immediately, and if it’s the bar from last call I will Not complain. I have a few upcoming OCs I have not introduced…..but I’m very excited about them. unbruised has one arriving imminently, as you WELL know, and she’s my new favourite, I think: I think she’d be my pick for crossover bc she’s just SO irascible. I love her dearly.

it would be fun to see Ali in Let Him Hear. he can argue with the best of them. he'd love that environment (and the free drinks).

also Jo. I don’t need to explain that one. you get it. who DOESN'T love a giant carebear-ass IDIOT. no-one. obviously.

If you could will the vibes from any of your stories into real life, which one are you most likely to do? And why is it last call?

okay so this one made me snort out LOUD raya. I cannot believe you. this is absurd. stop it immediately.

you're fucking right, which is more annoying. I think last call is such a mundane setting, and it's so tangible, and what I didn't realise when I was writing it is that every part of it takes place in one location. it's a fucking bottle episode.

but I think that lends it something: by the second scene you know the place, have the feel of it, so it's so so easy to feel the place. I love that so much about it. rereading it feels like it felt when I'd walk through it in my head. it's a place I've visited. I could almost touch it.

honorable mention is let him hear, actually: the busy social scene in the yawning winter, bright streetlight in frosty air, the hum and swell of voices, and the thrill of meeting someone new and interesting who, despite the odds, sees you. there's something precious in that, I think.

[cooliogirl101]

At first I couldn’t see Hisana/Gin as anything more than platonic frenemies but after some deep mulling i.e. fever dreams in the middle of the night after rereading, I can now conclude that yes. I ship it😔😔They are not what I thought I needed, but here I am, clutching them to my chest, and feeling my heart burn. 😭😭 Do you have any thing more of them in the Naruto AU?

He doesn't recognize her the first time they meet. Why would he? Different reiatsu signature (although here they call it chakra), different body, different face. She doesn't recognize him either, doesn't give him much thought aside from the fact that he's the Hokage's son, and, more importantly, Kushina's baby. She does notice the odd way he twitches at the sound of her name (but then babies always do odd things, don't they?), a movement so subtle she wouldn't have noticed had she not been holding him at the time. 5 year old Uchiha Hisana tells Minato congratulations, tells Kushina she'll be happy to babysit anytime, and that's that.

He doesn't recognize her the second, third, or fourth times they meet either. A few months short of his first birthday however, Kushina (he still doesn't think of her as mother) makes him attend the birthday party of some squealing brat (Satoshi, maybe, or Seiji-- something beginning with S). Ten minutes in and Gin (he still doesn't think of himself as Naruto) is ready to kill someone, maybe multiple someones. The birthday kid is screaming his head off because his big brother got called away for a mission. His screaming has apparently set off a chain reaction because at least three other brats have joined him in the chorus from hell. The Inuzuka kid's dog, apparently agitated from all the screaming, just made a run for it, bowling over a toddler in a trenchcoat (?) in its bid to get away.

To trenchcoat kid's credit though, at least he doesn't start crying like everyone else. No, he just sits down on the ground, cradling something in his hands, unnoticed in the chaos around him.

Or maybe not completely unnoticed.

Gin watches as Uchiha Hisana heads over to him, leaning down to whisper a few words in his ear. After a few seconds, the kid allows her to help him up and lead him away to a more secluded spot. Faintly curious despite himself, Gin follows them, hiding himself behind a bush.

"--shh, it's okay, see? I'm just taking away its pain, so it's not hurting," Uchiha Hisana says reassuringly to the kid-- an Aburame, Gin realizes. There's a kikachu on the ground in front of them, part of its shell crushed and several legs broken.

"...'ll be okay?" The Aburame kid asks quietly, still staring down at the injured kikachu. Hisana's expression softens.

"Yes," she promises. "Full recovery."

Gin watches as her hands light up with a familiar green glow, feeling an odd tightening sensation in his chest. He knows he's being irrational, that it's impossible for her to be-- that she can't be-- and yet.

And yet.

There's only one healer he knows who takes the time and effort to always start off by relieving her patients' pain. And only one healer he knows who'd take the time and effort to treat something as insignificant as an insect.

He waits until after she hands the insect, good as new, back to the Aburame boy, before stepping out from behind the bushes.

"Oh!" She says, surprised. "Naruto-kun, what are you--"

"Hisana?" He interrupts her, watching her intently for-- for some sign. Some sign that she could be--

She stops as she takes him in. Goes still. He watches her eyes widen, her mouth parting slightly in shock, trying desperately to ignore the tight sensation in his chest that feels increasingly like hope, as--

"Gin?"

~~

"How did ya know?" He asked her later. "That it was me, I mean."

Hisana huffed a laugh, tilting her head up towards the sky.

"No one else has ever looked at me the way you do," she said wryly. "It's hard to forget." She glanced back at him. "What about you? How did you recognize me?"

"Who else would go ta all that trouble of savin' a bug, just ta make some brat feel better?" He shrugged. "Never understood how ya survived the Rukongai goin' out of your way to help every sob story ya came across."

"Yeah, yeah, I know," Hisana waved him off. "Too soft to survive the Rukongai. Too soft to be a shinigami. And now, too soft to be a ninja," she mocked. "Well, I seem to have made it just fine, haven't I?"

"Remind me again, how many times have ya died?" He asked.

"Seeing as you're here, how many times have you?" She retorted. Gin paused.

"Fair enough." He smiled to keep the bitterness out of his voice. "So, what happens now?"

Hisana raised her eyebrows.

"What happens now? What happens is that I go back to my clan compound, I work on figuring out this whole ninja thing, and I try to knock some social skills into my socially inept cousins. You go back to your happy toddler life, or whatever the hell you were doing before you found me. Given that we live on opposite sides of the city, we'll probably barely see each other and with any luck, we'll never have to work together professionally in the future. We mutually agree to forgive and forget all the times we tried to kill each other, and decide to become distant former acquaintances instead. That's what's gonna happen."

Gin smiled, eyes squinting closed.

"Of course, Hisana-chan. Whatever you want."

~~The very next day~~

"What do you mean the Hokage assigned me to be your personal tutor?!"

(I love Byakuya/Hisana very much, but I have to admit Gin/Hisana is my guilty pleasure)

[annabellelux]

Favorite Books of 2021📚

So, as anyone who has me on Goodreads has probably gathered, I read a lot. In 2021, I read 186 new books (far surpassing my goal of 120), so I thought I’d share my top 10 personal favorites and my thoughts on them! 

In no particular order, and under the cut because this rec list is long: 

Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson

synopsis: the Spare™ princess gets married off to a God King to save her kingdom (and her sister who was supposed to go in her place). genius plots ensue 

none of the rest of these are ordered but THIS is my number one 

honestly every single book my brandon sanderson i read this year deserves my number one spot. i’m only putting one of his books on this list purely because if not he’d be half the list 

highest fantasy imaginable in the sense that the world is vivid and relatable but not in the sense where you’re bogged down with details. brandon sanderson just knows how to build a spectacular world 

the jumping on the bed scene killed me. if you know you know

the kind of book that makes my writer self so envious that it’s a physical thing 

if you aren’t currently reading this book i don’t know what you’re doing with your life

read when you want to actually be blown away by how perfect a plot is 

Charm Offensive by Allison Cochrun

synopsis: dating show producer and dating show star accidentally fall in love while making me accidentally fall in love with both of them 

i would actually and honestly die for Charlie, my awkward king

Dev needs to be my best friend yesterday 

great mental health rep

this made me feel all the things 

i squealed on more than one occasion 

cute and charming and kept a smile on my face the whole time 

the ending is honestly all i could’ve wanted and more 

read when you want to feel like you’re watching a reality dating show “ironically” with your best friends and then find yourself overly invested in the storylines and somehow, suddenly, you’re out here actually believing in love 

The Big Bad Wolf Series by Charlie Adhara

synopsis: secret agent and werewolf reluctantly team up to investigate werewolf related crimes while not trusting each other even a little bit

but also being like. damn, he’s hot  

five book series (and hopefully more!? charlie i’m begging) 

hot but somehow also adorable 

Cooper is clueless and prickly and oh so gay 

puts new meaning to the phrase “too gay to function” 

man will be in a life or death scenario and be like “but does he like me back????” 

Park is the baddest werewolf on the block AND a cinnamon roll 

every other character: he’s so scary and tough 

Cooper: that man needs a hug, stat

the mysteries are somehow ALL GOOD !? i can usually guess a plot twist but this had me screaming WHAT so many times but upon rereads i was like OHHHHHH

a masterclass in character and relationship development 

they learn how to communicate in such a realistic way. they both have their own hang-ups but they slowly learn how to open up about them and it’s genuinely so realistic and heart-warming 

ALSO made me care about a relationship that is ESTABLISHED for most of the series??? i cannot stress how rare this is for me 

i read all five books in like 3 days, staying up until 4 am on multiple occasions to do so. take from that what you will 

read when you want to explore the mysteries of love and murder 

Reputation by Lex Croucher

synopsis: regency girl moves in with her aunt and uncle a bunch of cool friends who spend their time being hot, wild, and hilarious 

the Mean Girls comparison is accurate in the most delicious ways 

genuinely laugh-out-loud hilarious

Lex is a genius with the one-liners  

but also insightful and poignant and gut-wrenching at times

there is NUANCE here 

all the heavy themes were handled with expert care

Thomas deserves the entire world 

amazing and varied queer rep

this book honestly made me feel like i could thrive in the regency era despite literally all the evidence to the contrary. it made me want to be mean and hot in a ballgown

read when you want to feel like the human equivalent of a glass of champagne and an expert hair flip 

Not My Problem by Ciara Smyth

synopsis: prickly girl helps her nemesis out in a highly unconventional way and then ends up being the school’s resident Weird Favors Girl 

a bunch of misfit teens doing stupid and hilarious stuff

every character was real 

Aideen is the perfect kind of flawed character. she’s an extremely authentic and she made me like her and root for her even when i didn’t love what she was doing or saying

the romance was WELL DEVELOPED and made my sapphic heart explode 

also the friendships were such a high point. i loved watching them navigate the complexity of it all 

exactly what i’m looking for in a sapphic romance. i will read every ciara smyth book forever probably 

read when you want to feel like you’re a teenager on a friday night having shenanigans with friends who feel like they’ll last a lifetime

She Drives Me Crazy by Kelly Quindlen 

synopsis: sapphic jock and cheerleader rivals-to-lovers AND fake dating 

make this into a movie yesterday. this has cinematic gold potential 

rom-com to end all rom-coms 

relationship development I can get behind 

teenagers who make mistakes but ALSO actually have enough braincells to find appropriately mature solutions 

recovering from a bad breakup in a healthy, non-toxic way 

when they finally got together it was like, perfect. it was so so so easy to root for both of the main characters

read when you want to feel like you’ve just looked out your window to see your crush with a boombox 

Camp by L.C. Rosen 

synopsis: boy changes literally everything about himself to get another boy to like him. but it’s at gay summer camp 

i know i just said the main character does something pretty yikes to get a relationship going but hear me out 

it is such a lovely exploration of toxic masculinity with such care and nuance 

it’s really about learning how to love yourself

character growth all around 

healthy sex positivity 

also. did you hear me say GAY SUMMER CAMP. i cannot tell you how much this made me crave a gay summer camp 

all the queer rep you could ever ask for 

read when you want to feel wrapped in a blanket of queer culture  

All For The Game Series by Nora Sakavic 

synopsis: boy with literally everything to lose risks life and limb to play stick ball 

i wish i was joking about how much Neil is willing to lose to live out his little jock dreams but i am unfortunately not 

Neil, at all times: a little murder is not enough to stop my good time. fuck you 

i am not going to lie to you. i hate-read all of book 1. i spent a majority of the time in absolute shock at what the fuck was happening. but i could not deny that i was thoroughly and honestly enjoying myself so i continued

by book 2 the author is ready to bring out the BIG GUNS and i honestly was hooked in a way that i did not see coming 

by book 3 i knew that i had found a new obsession 

to say there is a lot of trauma in this book would be a gross understatement. this series should not be read if you are not in a place to mitigate your triggers. please google a TW list beforehand if you are worried about this 

BUT I did really enjoy a lot of what the author had to say about living with trauma. i loved how all the characters had such weighty backstories how that was what brought them together and helped them work as a found family

can we talk about andrew and his knives????? because that is honestly my favorite thing about him 

you WILL spend several days/weeks/months/years in an ao3 rabbit hole afterwards. the fandom is alive and well and thriving out here 

read when you want to watch the world burn and laugh in the face of chaos 

You Deserve Each Other by Sarah Hogle

synopsis: a couple has grown to hate each others’ guts, and are trying to passive-aggressive their way out of their engagement without having to be the one to lose the wedding deposit 

essentially one big game of chicken with the person who is supposed to be the love of your life 

i could not stop laughing at how ridiculous this couple was. at the beginning i genuinely was like “how the hell did these two EVER fall in love????”

BUT 

the turnaround was so deliciously worth it because they had to work for it 

they both needed so much character development that they should have been wearing “DANGER: PERSON UNDER CONSTRUCTION” signs 

but that was what made the character and relationship development GLORIOUS  

i went from not rooting for these two monsters in the slightest to literally wanting the world for them. and THAT is literary talent 

Naomi is so dramatic in the funniest possible way and has some of the best one-liners of all time 

Nathaniel grows on you as he grows on Naomi and she slowly understands him better and then you realize, hey, this man is actually lovely 

get you a man who will learn from his mistakes 

i literally know no one who has read this book and i want someone to so i can scream about how wild it is 

seriously guys i’ve read it three times in three months. it’s my new comfort book 

read when you want to see the power of communication and self-improvement 

The House in The Cerulean Sea

synopsis: bureaucrat goes to Magic Orphan Island and learns the meaning of life 

i know everyone and their mother already read this but i was a hold out for like a year because I was being weirdly contrary. i wasn’t really in the mood for this book for like, over a year 

and then I read it and I Got It. the hype suddenly made sense 

and now I would die for the World’s Best Dad, a constantly flustered rule-follower, a little girl with a beard, a blob that just wants to be a hotel concierge, a shy boy with a big heart and at times a wet nose, a small but mighty sprite child, a dragon who just wants coins, and the LITERAL anti-christ 

i can’t really explain this book. you kinda just have to read it and let yourself feel things 

read when you want to simultaneously be crying and smiling 

The Spanish Love Deception by  Elena Armas

synopsis: i hate my coworker but he's going to be my date/fake boyfriend at a a wedding across the globe anyways because my ex is going to be there and he deserves to rue the day he crossed me 

Catalina is not actually vindictive. I am vindictive. I wanted her ex to rue the day

WORK RIVALS. TO. LOVERS. NEED I SAY MORE 

Catalina says jump and Aaron says “when, how high, do you want me to get you a doughnut while I’m at it?” 

basically he’s a simp. and men must always be simps for me to love them 

i had a crush on this man. i’m brave enough to admit it 

this won a goodreads award as it should 

i was having fun literally every minute of this book. i could not get enough. 

the banter was top-notch 

read when you want your stomach to hurt from butterflies and from laughing 

HONORABLE MENTION: I Kissed Shara Wheeler by Casey McQuiston. 

I only didn’t include this because it’s not out yet (i got it as an ARC) so I didn’t want to go on and on about something most people can’t read for over six months 

But put that on your TBR immediately and circle back so we can scream about it together 

If you got this far, I love you 

[jiminniethemarshmallow]

Wait For Me (M)

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Genre: smut, pwp

Word Count: 6k

Warnings: yikes switch!reader, switch!Jimin (but mostly dom), needy!Jimin, horny-ass-mf!Jimin, masturbation, dirty talk, ruined orgasm, post-orgasm torture, dirty talk, overstimulation, 69(?), multiple orgasms, unprotected sex, dirty talk, creampie, pet names, begging, dirty talk, omg so much dirty talk I’m going crazy

(A/N): Am I the only one that’s into dirty talk like this? Maybe. But did I enjoy writing this? Absolutely. Kinda for Jimin’s birthday but really just me needing an excuse to be a sl*t in writing.

“Please, (Y/n)?” Your boyfriend whines from his spot on the bed, the tent in his boxers already pitched to full height behind you.

“No! Wait until I’m finished.” You huff in frustration, trying your hardest to focus on the words in front of you. It’s a stuffy Sunday night like any other, you sitting at your desk doing your homework at the last minute and Jimin reclining on your shared mattress doing whatever the hell he wants. Except, tonight all he wants to do is you. You’ve been prancing around the house in nothing but his shirt and a pair of panties all day, teasing him playfully and laughing whenever he would get worked up. You thought it was funny how easily you could get him hard without trying, but it doesn’t seem so funny now when he keeps begging to fuck you while you’re desperately trying to complete your homework.

“You promised we would fuck tonight!” His pout is evident in the tone of his voice but you refuse to look at him. If you do, you just might give in.

“We will, but I have to finish this assignment first. It’s due at midnight, so I really need to get it done right now.” It’s your fault for waiting until the night of to work on this, but you wrongfully assumed that Jimin would understand and let you work in peace. All you have to do is complete a short reading and take a 10 question quiz and then you’re free, but what should have been a 15 minute endeavor has now turned into an hour and a half of arguing and rereading the same 3 sentences over and over. It’s getting ridiculous.

“You said you wouldn’t take long, but I’ve been sitting here ALL NIGHT waiting for you.”

“That’s because you won’t shut up!” You snap, glaring at him from the corner of your eye. His mouth falls open before he frowns, puffing his cheeks out cutely for no one to see. You think you hear him mutter something under his breath, but you don’t question it and instead take his momentary silence to speed through a page.

The silence continues for a couple of minutes and you swear you can feel his eyes burning into the back of your seat. There’s some shuffling on the bed, more silence, and just when you begin to think he’s found something useful to do instead of bothering you, you hear a groan. The hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

He’s closer than he was before— probably sitting on the edge of the bed facing you now— and it almost feels like he’s breathing down your neck with how clear his voice sounds now. You scoot your chair up slightly to escape him. The sound of friction fills the space of the room, the image of his hand wrapped around his dick floating around your mind even when you refuse to look at him. He pumps fairly slowly, his eyes still glued to your back.

“Mmm, I’m so fucking hard, baby.” Jimin moans to you, trying to coax you into turning your head to see him. “I’ve been hard all day because of you and now you won’t even look at me? Such a bad girl.” You roll your eyes, tuning him out as best you can. Yet, you can’t seem to ignore the wet squelch that fills your ears when he rolls over his head. He moans louder this time. “Since you won’t look at me, I guess I’ll just have to tell you what I’m doing. Wouldn’t want you to miss out on anything.”

At your sigh, he chuckles, the sound dark and mischievous in a way that makes you ball up your fists. “Jimin,” You warn, but he knows the threat holds no real substance.

“My cock is so red right now, just aching to fuck your tight little pussy, princess. It’s leaking already, can you hear it? All that precum just for you.” You close your eyes, envisioning the sight you’ve seen so many times, but your eyes snap open when you remember your objective and turn the page of your book. “I want you so bad, want you to lick it all up and take me into your throat. Fuck. My hand feels nothing like that hot mouth of yours.” His strokes are longer now, dragging breathy, rhythmic pants from him.

You’d be lying if you said his voice wasn’t making you wet, but you won’t let him know that. He’ll be at this for a while, you know how much he likes to tease himself, so you try your hardest to get used to his rhythm and make it background noise as you progress through the reading. But the words on the pages don’t seem nearly as interesting as the words he feeds you from his plump lips.

“My head is so sensitive, princess, I can barely even touch it without almost cumming.” He grunts, gasping every time his hand nears his tip. You lick your lips, shifting in your seat, an action he catches onto. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Seeing me cum all over myself while fucking my hand? Calling your name as I make a mess all over myself and our bedsheets?” The bed squeaks and you can only imagine that it’s from his hips bucking into his fist, picking up speed as he speaks. Your clit throbs annoyingly, and before you can stop yourself, your hand slips between your legs to rub over your panties. Thankfully, he doesn’t see this, probably because his head is thrown back as he lets out a series of moans.

You’re sensitive. More sensitive than you realized. And you almost let out a sound of your own when he curses. And for a brief moment— a split second— you contemplate abandoning your work and indulging him just to end your suffering. But no, you can’t give in that easily, you have less than a half hour to do your assignment. You’ll keep your hand where it is, however.

“Feels so fucking good,” Jimin lets out a drawn out moan, slowing his pace and working his hand again so you can hear it slapping against the skin of his abdomen. It’s loud and wetter than before, making you gush in your underwear at the thought of how worked up he’s getting. “I know how much you like playing with my balls,” You hear the grin in his voice. “So I’ll play with them a little for you, baby.” The obscene moan that falls from his mouth makes your eyes roll, the material of your panties completely soaked now at how desperate he sounds. You can’t help but to rub yourself to him, willing yourself not to turn around. “I wanna feel that tight little pussy bouncing on my cock, princess. So wet that you drip and cream down my balls as you ride this big cock til you cum, and beg me to cum deep inside your hot cunt. Will- oh shit- will you let me cum inside you tonight, baby? Let me cum deep inside and fill you up so you’re dripping me for days?” His voice is heavy with lust, it’s tone dipping deeper as his moans pitch higher. You assume it’s a rhetorical question so you don’t respond. “Hmm? Are you wet thinking about my cock and cum filling you up, (Y/n)?”

“No.” You lie through your teeth, voice surprisingly stable despite how your fingers move rapidly over your clothed clit. You can feel your wetness through the fabric now, and you just know there will be a stain on your chair when you get up, but you can’t bring yourself to care.

“No?” He asks teasingly. “You okay over there? You haven’t turned a page in a while.” Damn him for being so observant. You almost forgot you were reading, the words all jumbled up on the page as your focus is pulled away by the pleasure. Fuck it, you’ll just take the quiz now to get it over with and accept whatever score you get. Jimin watches  in amusement as you turn to your laptop, clicking open the quiz hurriedly and starting the questions, zooming through the first 5. He lets out a short laugh at that. “You better hurry, I’m getting close.”

Sucking in through his teeth, you hear him speed up again, spitting onto himself to make the glide smoother, and your core clenches in want. You read question #6 four times before you comprehend what it’s asking, your body betraying you as it yearns for you to look over at your stubborn boyfriend who curses out your name.

“Listen to that sound, princess. That’s what it would sound like if I was fucking you right now. God, I should just bend you over that desk and take you right here for making me wait like this. Make you take every inch of this cock and see if you can ignore me then.” He nearly growls this, an inaudible whimper squeezing from your throat. You would love that. He’s done it before, pushed you up against the desk and had his way with you when you thought it would be funny to give him a strip tease after he ordered you to get on the bed one wine-laced night. But he doesn’t deserve to have you like that after torturing you like this.

Only 3 more questions left and he’s getting more needy, the whiny quality of his voice letting you know how close he is before his words. A noise that you’re all too familiar with fills the air and you freeze. It’s quick and sloppy, the sound of his hand focusing directly on his tip at an inhuman speed that not even you could reproduce. His moans follow the pace, each one getting longer and pitchier, and you can almost hear how his hips lift off the sheets.

“You better not cum.”

“You want me to edge? But I’ve been on edge all day, baby.” He complains. Against your better judgment, you whip your head around to look at him. There, he sits naked on the edge of the bed, legs spread wide as he leans back on one elbow, one hand tangled in the sheets, the other stroking slowly at his thick cock upon your request. It’s red and leaking just like he said, the glistening tip causing your mouth to water. Jimin’s head is thrown back to expose his sweaty neck, Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows, eyes shut in pleasure. But once he realizes that you’re looking at him, he snaps his head up to meet your gaze and sends you a shit-eating grin at the flushed look on your face. Then, he resumes working at his head, arching his hips up in the most erotic sight you’ve ever had the pleasure of witnessing. That’s the last straw.

“Don’t you dare fucking cum!” You growl.

You click random answers on the last few quiz questions, hitting submit and slamming your laptop shut before stomping over to him, slapping his hand away as you clamber up onto the bed, pushing him down aggressively and throwing a leg over his chest to face his erection. It jumps at you, so painfully hard that you almost feel bad for him. But Jimin doesn’t deserve your pity right now. Not long after your hand finds him, your mouth fits over the soft tip.

“Fuuuuuck.” He grunts, hands finding your ass instantly. The crotch of your panties are soaked all the way through, the dark spot causing a smirk to cross his lips. “Why did you lie to me, princess? I thought you said you weren’t wet?” For some reason, hearing him say this makes you even wetter, and you suck in a breath through your nose when his fingers come up to touch your core, a deep hum vibrating through his body that ends in a chuckle. “Absolutely drenched, baby. Were you touching yourself over there? Your clit is so swollen I can see it through your panties.”

His voice hitches at the end of his sentence as you sink all the way down on him, pushing yourself to take him all the way into your throat just like he wanted, the tip of your nose resting at his balls. It’s partially payback for his teasing, but you adore the response you get from him as he nearly chokes on air from the sudden stimulation. You bob a few times, a delightful lightheaded feeling overtaking you as you hold your breath and force yourself to keep him in your throat. Your reward is that you finally shut him up, Jimin now at a loss of words beneath you and shaking with the effort it takes to not fuck into your mouth. Smirking, you pull off of him, dropping your ass down a bit until your core grazes his lips, and he gets the hint immediately. Always the eager lover, he pulls the crotch of your underwear to the side, groaning at the strings of arousal that cling to it. The sight makes his mouth water, his tongue lurching forward to lick a long stripe up your slit, gliding back down to suck at your engorged clit.

Your moan is muffled around him, working the top half of his shaft while one hand accommodates the rest, and your jaw is already starting to hurt from his size. Although he’s generally a small person, Jimin’s cock is anything but. Your jaw fell to the floor the first time he dropped his pants, the girth surprising you pleasantly. He’s got an impressive width that left you sore for a few days and a length that is well above average. His balls always seem plump and heavy, ready for you to milk them dry, and you can’t stop yourself from reaching up and grabbing them, massaging the plush sacs for your own amusement.

“Oh f- you’re so good at this.” He cuts himself off with a gasp, kissing the inside of your thighs and biting hickies into them as his mind becomes cloudy. He’s close— if the slight movement of his hips is any indication— and an evil idea pops into your mind. His hips thrust upwards at a particularly hard suck at his tip and you gag at the sudden depth, Jimin nearly yelling out at how your throat closes around him. “Yesss, baby girl, choke on my dick.” You preen at his praise, but keep your composure.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full.” Your hips push back into him, covering his mouth with your lower lips, and he continues his work enthusiastically to distract himself. You’ve switched to using just your tongue now, licking up and down the solid shaft and circling around the head, providing just enough stimulation to inch him closer to the edge but no longer giving him what he wants. What he wants is a hard and fast orgasm. You’ll make sure that’s not what he gets. His groans increase in volume and frequency as you work your magic tongue, flicking over that sensitive fold of skin where his tip attaches to the rest of him, and it’s not long before he’s trembling.

“(Y/n),” He mumbles out a shaky warning, and you have to push down his hips with one hand when they begin to lift off the bed, your other hand jerking steadily at his base while you tease over his slit with the tip of your tongue. The pressure builds, his balls lifting in preparation for his release, and you coax it out of him with a few gentle sucks. “Ah!”

Jimin lets out a high pitched groan sounding almost in pain when you pull off of him, squeezing at his base so hard that only a few short spurts of cum make it out. Your mouth has been completely removed from him, it’s only connection being the long strand of saliva hanging from your lips, and he bucks up frantically in search of stimulation to complete his orgasm. Still rock hard, he practically begs you to move your hand, to give him anything as the few lonely globs of semen sadly skid down onto your hand like tears from his one-eyed monster. His mouth is covered by your pussy so you can’t hear his pleas, but the vibrations they send to your core are absolutely delightful. Once you’re sure he’s finished cumming, you begin your evil plan.

It starts with a few slow pumps, lubed by his own semen from his length that’s still twitching in your hand, but it quickly escalates to firm and steady strokes that have him squirming under you. You aren’t even going that fast, but the sensitivity makes him thrash and cry out prettily as you hold him down with your body weight. Jimin’s into all kinds of freaky shit, so this isn’t the first time you’ve indulged in post orgasm torture, but it’s somehow very different when he’s not expecting it. Your hand moves at an unyielding pace, unbothered by the way his legs open and close only to be smacked apart by the hand that still holds his balls.

“I’ll stop when you make me cum.” You state, unsure if he can even hear you. But his tongue dives in with renewed vigor, flicking relentlessly at your clit as you grind down on him. It won’t take long to reach your peak, his technique is flawless, licking wide circles around your bud with the flat of his tongue and then raising up to plunge his long muscle between your walls. Your essence dribbles down onto his face, wetting his chin and cheeks as he eats you like a man starved. You haven’t been this turned on in a long while, you didn’t think you’d be so into seeing him suffer in pleasure like this— his body writhing under yours and cock still so insanely hard in your hand just from the light hold you have on him. His hands claw at your ass, pulling you down and spreading your cheeks apart, fingers bruising the flesh in his haze of sweet agony.

You moan for him and bite your lip, closing your eyes as he edges you closer to your peak, your hand starting to stutter on him. It’s easy to get lost in him and grind down into his mouth, the feeling of his tongue between your folds heavenly, the feeling of his lips even better. But what sets you over the top is when his fingers snake into your opening, first two, then three. The stretch causes you to throw your head back, and you go flying head first into your orgasm when he curls into that one spot, tongue still on your clit and fingers wiggling inside you as your walls spasm around him. With one last groan, you lift away from him, finally moving your hands to his thighs to grip the muscles as you try to catch your breath. Jimin does the same, relaxing into the mattress as a few more ticklish waves flow through him.

“Was that okay?” You spin around until you’re laid on top of him, chin on his chest looking up into his dark chocolate eyes. He cracks a brief smile at your cuteness before flipping you over, capturing your lips sweetly. But the sweetness ends before you can even enjoy it when he bites down on your lip, a whimper falling from you.

“You can’t ask for my consent after it’s over.” He points out, trying to hide his giggle in the crook of your neck as he sucks dark marks there. “But, yeah, that was fucking hot.” The tip of his erection prods at your ass cheek, nudging the fabric of your soiled underwear. Without pulling away, Jimin hooks his fingers into your waistband, snatching them off and chucking them across the room, next comes your shirt, which he damn near rips in his haste to get it over your head. He growls. “So fucking sexy. And all mine. Right, princess?”

“Yes, Jimin, I’m all yours. Do whatever you want with me.” In an instant you switch roles, dropping the momentary dominance to cower in his presence. There’s a hunger in your boyfriend’s eyes that you provoked, the product of the teasing he faced all day, and you drip down your ass at the thought of him taking you however he wants. You suspect he’ll be eager to finally fuck you, but you underestimate how petty he can be. The tip of his cock runs through your wetness, but when he sees the way you jump when it rolls over your sensitive clit, his eyes narrow, seeing an opportunity to get his revenge. Dipping down briefly to collect more of your wetness, he glides the slick underside of him over your bundle of nerves, using his thumb to press down and add pressure, then he grinds his hips ever so slowly back and forth over you, forcing you to feel every ridge of him bump against you. “Oh fuck!” You gasp out, spreading your legs wider and lifting your hips into him. His length is hot, still burning and hard from not getting a full orgasm.

“You like this, baby? You like how my cock feels between these soft lips, rubbing that cute little clit?” He grins when your eyes roll back, thighs already starting to tremble. “Maybe I should just fuck you like this. Make you cum without ever even entering you.”

“No! No, please, Jimin.” Your eyes pop open in alarm at the thought of him not fucking you tonight, though you know he’s far too wound up to deny both of you that. Still, he persists his humping, groaning along with you as you feel another orgasm creeping up embarrassingly fast.

“Hmm, seems like you’d like that though? I mean, you look like you’re about to cum again already.” The patronizing tone of voice he uses would piss you off in any other situation, but you’re not in your right mind currently. As he picks up pace you feel your mind slipping away, your clit throbbing and your empty walls clenching almost painfully around nothing. You try to hold back and prove him wrong, you really do, but your body betrays you and with every nudge of his tip you can feel yourself falling. The most you can let out is a desperate whine. “If you want something, use your words and tell me.”

“P-please...”

“Please what?” You can feel his eyes on your face, but your eyelids are sealed shut and your head is tossed back into the pillows. It takes everything in you to muster the strength to form a coherent sentence and push it past your lips.

“P-please fuck me, baby.” Your voice hiccups at a particular stroke, the hood of your bud now pushed back for more direct stimulation. You aren’t sure how long you’ll last like this.

“You want me to fuck you?” He coos, twitching against your lower lips.

“Yes please, I need your cock.” Asking in the sweetest voice you can, you peel your eyes open to bat your lashes at him, but they snap shut once again when he suddenly pushes inside your velvet walls, shoving you off the edge unexpectedly.

“That’s my good girl,” Jimin sighs once he’s bottomed out, hands roaming your torso as you shake uncontrollably. “So desperate for my cock that you came right when I put it in.” He clicks his tongue, but if you were cognizant at the moment you would have noticed his satisfied tone. You clamp down on him as your orgasm washes through you, and he rides the waves with shallow pumps of his hips and his fingers tweaking your nipples, grunting at the way you pulse around him.

He pushes in deeper as you start coming down, the sensitivity kicking in with every drag of his member inside you. He pays no mind to your whimpering and reaches around your back to lift you up, seating you in his lap with your heels on the tops of his ass. And your hips start moving immediately despite the tingling that shoots up your spine.

Though his body screams for release after his incomplete high, Jimin can’t help but guide you into a sensual pace of grinding and rocking, the intimacy soothing him. With your arms around his neck, you fall into a comfortable rhythm as you slide back and forth against his length, adding a swivel of your hips just to hear him groan. Your weight on top of his feels like the most natural thing in the world and he wishes you could stay like this forever. Running his hands up and down your back, he allows you to mark up his neck and collarbones for everyone to see. He always wears your love bites so proudly. Relishes in the slight tickle of your tongue and nip of your teeth that whisper to him ‘you are mine’. Rose petals bloom on the surface of his skin all the way up to his ear lobe where you nibble.

“Your cock feels fucking amazing, babe.” You whisper in that sultry tone of yours, noting how his hips twitch beneath yours. You’d never say it out loud but you’ve been thinking of this all day. Waiting to hold him close and just love one another. His lips plant a few stray kisses to the side of your neck before trailing downwards, capturing a pert bud between them. You lean back on your hands to give him more access, grinding down just a bit harder when his hips lift to meet yours to make sure you get every inch he has to offer. With your head thrown back like this Jimin can reach that delicate spot deep inside you with ease, humming at the shaky moan you let out. His lips curl into a grin when you begin to bounce with desperation, planting your feet behind him for leverage.

Jimin’s eyes peer up at you as you ride his dick, your breast bouncing in his mouth as he switches to the other to suck. Sweat has now accumulated on your forehead and neck, the droplets glittering against your complexion. Your eyes are screwed shut and the prettiest flush has overtaken your cheeks and chest as you work for your next high, lips bitten and eyebrows squinted together. Truly, you are gorgeous. It makes him impossibly harder to see you like this, his length already throbbing within you, but he holds back as much as he can simply because seeing you fall apart is almost more satisfying than experiencing it himself. It should be surprising that you’re getting close already, but it’s always been easy for you to cum quickly after your first orgasm, the sensitivity and connection you have with your lover making you as explosive as a lit firecracker.

“You’re so needy tonight, princess, is it because of how much you teased me all day? Did you like watching me suffer?” You don’t answer because, frankly, yes. You loved it. And it’s too embarrassing to admit, but Jimin already knows. “Well, let’s see how much you like it when I destroy this cunt until you can’t walk.” The gruffness of his voice makes your eyes roll, the tenderness he’d shown not even a minute ago gone completely as he lets his teeth scrape over your nipple.

Bringing you flush against his chest again, he hooks his elbows under your knees and starts pounding into you in earnest, your hands flying to his shoulders for stability. His core strength is a sight to behold, supporting almost all of your weight while sitting upright, pulling you onto his cock as though you weigh nothing. And all you can do is hang on for the ride, gasping and crying out at the way he repeatedly slams into your spot. Tangling your hands in his hair, you pull him closer and rest your face on the crown of his head, feeling your limbs go weak from the pleasure.

He grunts below you when you tug, bucking up harder when your walls start to squeeze. Wetness streaks down your ass, a string of curses tumble out of your mouth to accompany the lewd sounds of him pushing through your arousal. Each stroke is calculated, and you find yourself teetering very close to the edge.

“Please, Jimin, I’m so close. Please can I cum?” You mumble, barely coherent.

“My baby girl wants to cum again?” He coos into your collarbone, the ticklish skim of his lips sending a shiver through you. ‘My baby girl.’ That one word has you shaking.

“Yes!” You wail as his hands tighten on your ass, palming the globes harshly to slam you down on his length. You can just imagine how sexy his arms look right now, the muscles and veins bulging in his forearms and hands from how tightly he holds you, his biceps and shoulders on full display and glimmering with perspiration. His voice rumbles against you in that thick Busan accent and you almost cream right there.

“Beg for it.” He looks up into your eyes and you see something dark, a heady lust that lowers his eyelids and makes you feel like you’re looking at the definition of sex itself.

“Please please please let me cum, baby!” Your voice shakes with each jolt of your body against his. “I’m so greedy for your cock, I wanna cum for you. You make me feel so good!” Pleased, Jimin gives you permission and moves a little faster, pressing you down against him so your clit rubs against him every time, and you nearly scream from the feeling. You sing your praises into the room knowing how it motivates him, but you couldn’t stop even if you tried. Skin slicked with sweat, you let yourself fall into another breathtaking high, clinging onto your boyfriend who grinds you on top of him to savor the way you clench and throb around his tip when it’s buried deep inside you.

“Fuck,” You both swear at the same time, taking a brief moment to catch your breath as Jimin kisses his way up your neck, releasing your legs and squeezing you close with his arms wrapped tight around your back. Exhaustion dances through you and you sit limply in his hold, eyes closed and basking in his sticky heat. But the moment is soon over when you feel him twitch within your sensitive walls, growling as he shifts his weight until your back is pressed into the mattress with him kneeling over you.

“Keep those eyes open, baby, I’m not done with you yet.” You gasp when his hips begin to move again, your nerves rubbed raw and swollen from the three highs he’s already pulled from you. Still, your eyes roll in delight when he starts ramming into you again, pushing your legs as far apart as they will go and holding you open. “You didn’t think I would let you off that easy, did you, princess? You still need to be punished for today.” He coos, voice gentle despite his hard thrusts. You whine loudly and attempt to close your legs when he touches a sweet spot deep within you, the pleasure almost too much, but it’s like you’re addicted to him, unable to get enough even when your body begs for reprieve. “Shhh, I know you can take it, baby. I know how much you love it when I overstimulate this greedy pussy, so be a good girl and take it.”

He’s absolutely correct, you love the overstimulation and the twinge of pain and overwhelming pleasure that comes with it. And you know this is his payback for the post-orgasm torture you gave him earlier. You’re still incredibly wet, new arousal dripping out of your entrance every time he plunges in, the mess of your juices and his precum dripping down the crack of your ass and onto your bedsheets. Looking up at Jimin’s face, you see how entranced he is by the sight before him, eyes trained between your legs as he watches himself disappear inside you and re-emerge with a new coating of slick covering his shaft. Smirking, you reach your hands down around your ass and pull your lips open wider for him, biting your lip at the way his eyebrows crease together and his mouth drops open at the sight. His pace slows slightly, his breathing labored as he begins to slowly unravel for you.

“Fuck, that’s so sexy! God, you always take my cock so well, princess.” He hisses, licking his full lips when your clit throbs at his praise. He can see and feel when you tighten, his tip finding that spot again that makes your back arch off the bed.

“Jimin,” You mewl, your thighs shaking in his grip and fingers clawing the sheets. Tears build in your beautiful eyes. It feels so good, but would you be able to handle a fourth orgasm tonight? Your body feels pushed to the limit, but your lover says otherwise.

“C’mon, baby girl, cum for me one more time.” You shake your head in desperation, pleading with him with your watery eyes. “Yes you can. Just relax for me, baby, I got you. I want you to cum one last time, just one more, and then I’m gonna fill you up.” He encourages softly, yet you don’t miss the dominant undertones that tell that this is a command. With a huff from his nostrils, he pounds into you harder while fighting off his own release, staying deep right up against that spot making you cry out. His hands reach for your breast and you place your hands over his for comfort, moaning as he squeezes the bouncing mounds as you toss your head back.

“I- I don’t think I can...” You whimper, unsure if you can get there with your nerves feeling numb and worn like this. But Park Jimin is nothing if not determined, so he takes your statement as a challenge. Slipping one hand away from you, he presses his thumb to your lips, staring down at you intensely before you open.

“Suck.” On command, you swirl your tongue around his digit, coating it in your spit before he slides it out with a pop. Suddenly, he’s pressing against your swollen clit in tight circles and those special tingles shoot up and down your spine at the feeling. He hums at the sounds you make, eyes sealed shut because of the blinding waves of bliss coursing through your veins, building you up almost frighteningly fast. He feels you pulse, your jelly legs trembling on either side of him as they attempt to close, but his praises fall on deaf ears as you chase the sensations of his skillful hips and fingers, rocking into him with the last of your energy until you reach the brink.

“Oh my god-!” You shudder and shriek as you finally tense up around him. Your walls clamp down repeatedly as Jimin continues flicking your sensitive nub, and the tears that had been welling up finally spill over. He stops only when your breathing turns to pitiful snivels, wiping away your tears with caring hands and loving eyes. His hips are still fucking you through the aftershocks as he kisses his way around your face, planting his lips firmly on yours until your breathing evens out.

“I’m gonna cum soon,” He whispers out, resting his forehead against yours. “Will you let me cum in this pretty little pussy, baby?” You nod against him, staring right into his coffee colored eyes. “Mm, I want you to keep it inside all night, okay princess? So I can fuck it out of you in the morning. Will you do that for me?”

“Fuck, yes.” You moan. You can feel the way he gets just a bit harder, how his muscles start to shake just slightly, and you know exactly how to push him over the edge. Your fingers lightly caress the velvety skin of his balls, causing a surprised moan to leave his lips. “I want your cum so bad, Jimin. I promise I’ll keep it inside, I’ll be a good girl for you. Please fill me up.” Knowing how much your words would affect him, you use your sweetest voice and lock your heels around his back. His head swims with desire and his voice strains.

Sitting up a bit, his hands clamp onto your hips to stroke into you in earnest, face contorted in the sexiest of expressions. You want to shy away from his intense gaze but you can’t pull your eyes away from him, drinking up the sight of his clenching abs, sweaty chest and neck, and the pure hunger that overtakes his features. “Good girl. Don’t move. Enjoy the feeling of my cum filling you up.” With a few more grunts and groans, he allows himself to release into you, shuddering almost as hard as you were from the feeling of the full orgasm he had been waiting for all day. Spurt after spurt of his release covers your walls, and your inner muscles suck it in as if on instinct, throbbing around him to milk every last drop. You let him collapse onto you as he finishes, cock still throbbing while he gasps and pants into the crook of your neck. You can feel it already starting to leak out around him, but he won’t be too upset about it since he’ll likely have fun fingering it back into you later.

There’s a comfortable silence as you both catch your breath, pressing sleepy kisses to each other’s damp skin with rosy cheeks and smiles on your faces. Jimin moves first, groaning when his muscles scream out in soreness when he sits at the side of the bed to pull on his boxers. You giggle, commenting about how you were supposed to be the one unable to walk, not the other way around. He snorts passing you a pair of panties and helping you stand so you can make it to the bathroom.

Once you’re both cleaned up, you get ready for bed, grumbling about having an early class tomorrow morning. Which reminds you of the homework quiz you took tonight. Opening your laptop again, you check your score, only to have your face drop at what you see.

“50 PERCENT?!” You whip around to face your boyfriend, who was back to reclining against the headboard, the scene similar to the beginning of your night. “You owe me for this, Jimin.”

He waves you off. “Those quizzes aren’t even worth that much, you’ll be fine.” But you disagree because you’ve already missed 2 of them and only the lowest 2 scores are dropped at the end of the semester. He rolls his eyes when you tell him this, cutting you off with a dramatic groan. “Babyyyyyy, stop talking about school and come to bed.” His pout is unmatched, so you easily relent and shut down your laptop, huffing and puffing the entire time.

“You owe me cuddles and breakfast tomorrow morning.” You grumble as you climb in next to him, fitting your body with his.

“And shower sex.” He winks at you and you snort, turning out the bedside lamp.

“Goodnight, Jimin.” You laugh, snuggling up to his chest in the quiet of your stuffy room.

...

“So no shower sex?”

[nypmphetsbastard]

They Both Die in the End (ch.2)

Chatter filled the makeshift cafeteria as everybody had just now began returning from their long hours of hard labor. The port finally completed meaning everyone had to start preparing for the arrival of more enemy and new comrades. Chatter filled the makeshift cafeteria as everybody had just now began returning from their long hours of hard labor. The port finally completed meaning everyone had to start preparing for the arrival of more enemy and new comrades. 

You leaned against the table and munched on some bread as you listened to Sasha talk. Despite your current situation, you couldn’t help but live in the present while everyone else worried of the future. Maybe this is why you preferred Sasha’s company more than anybody else’s.

The young brunette never liked stressing herself out thinking of the future, said it would give her gray hairs early — she lived in the present and made the best out of any situation that was thrown her way. Her presence felt like a breath of fresh air to those around her, it was no surprise Sasha has so many friends. Hell, even Floch likes Sasha and he doesn’t like anybody. 

“And then he tried to take my meat so I-” Sasha was cut off by Armin’s voice called both of your names from afar, he jogged over in a state of stress.

”Have you seen Eren?” He spoke aloud but you knew the question was more directed to you considering the two of you almost never left each other’s side. 

“Um no. The last time I saw him, Hange and the others were taking him back to his cell for the night.” Armin sighed.

”Yeah he was, but Commander Hange said he asked to stop for a second to take a piss and when they looked back he was gone.” Armin explained, running his hand through his hair. You sighed and gave your unfinished reread to Sasha who gladly took it. 

”I’ll help you look.”

It wasn’t uncommon for Eren to run off sometimes. Frankly, it happened whenever he got stressed and didn’t feel like being smothered anymore. He never went far, never went somewhere completely off the grid, but always somewhere he knew you and only you would find him. Today being an example of that. 

Legs burning from all the walking, you finally reached the rocky shore where you saw a distant body swimming in the water. Muttering an annoyed “what the hell?” under your breath, you walked closer to the shore.

Stepping up to the elongated rocks that acted as a deck, you make out your brown haired boyfriend bobbing up and down in the water until he finally noticed you. His eyes lit up as a smile stretched onto his face and he pulled himself out of the water, wasting no time in running towards you with open arms. 

Making a playfully disgusted face, you curled into yourself and Eren threw himself onto you and wrapped his arms around you. You groaned and he squeezed you tightly.

”Gross, you’re all wet.” You playfully complained, he didn’t say anything and instead pulled away, holding you by your shoulders. “Why did you run?” 

He shrugged, “I didn’t run.” You gave him a pointed look, ”I merely got distracted by a butterfly and casually walked away from their line of sight.” 

You rolled your eyes, “Yeah well it’s still considered running, Eren.” You placed your hands on his chest, “What are you doing here, anyways? It’s already dark.” 

“Just wanted to take a little swim.” He grabbed your hand on his chest and lead you towards the edge of the rocks where he let go of your hand and jumped in. 

“Since when do you know how to swim?” You giggled, Eren’s head emerged from the water and placed his head between your thighs with his arms folded on the side of your thighs. 

“Since now, of course.” Smiling cheekily, Eren placed a kiss on each side of your thigh. 

“Haven’t you heard the stories of this place?” 

“What stories?” 

“Apparently, many years ago there were these two Eldians who had escaped the walls, lovers. They left before night fall meaning it was simple enough to get through Titans as they were beginning to slow down without the sunlight. And when they finally reached the ocean, they thought they made it...but then came an abnormal. Adam, the man he was grabbed by the Titan and told Lilith, the woman to run away into the sea and leave him behind. But it was useless and after devouring the love of her life the abnormal came after her in the water. And as the Titan held her in his hand, mouth stained with the blood of her lover, Lilith vowed that any lovers lucky enough to reach the sea and swim in it would be cursed, as her and her lover were.” 

Silence came between you as you finished the tale until Eren finally spoke up

“Oh darling,” he leaned up to your lips, “we’ve always been cursed.” Just as his lips met yours, his arms wrapped around your back and yanked you into the water with him.

Ice cold water prickled your skin sharply as you two fell in, Eren still holding onto you while you flailed around. Letting go of the breath you were holding underwater, you slapped Eren shoulder once you reached the surface.

“You asshole!” He laughed aloud at your anger and threw his head back, “It’s not funny, Eren. I can’t even swim!” You exclaimed.

“Oh I can tell, you’re squeezing me like I’m about to drop you!” Eren laughed, referencing your legs that were tightly wrapped around his waist and your arms that followed. 

“Or will I?” He joked, pretending to let go of your legs to which you screeched and held his shoulders tightly, nearly drowning him yourself.

The boy was still in tears at your reactions, mouth wide open giving you the perfect opportunity to splash water into it. He quickly stopped laughed and coughed harshly at the salty taste in his mouth. 

”Not so funny when it’s happening to you, huh?” You chuckled, after his coughing feat he joined in on your laugher and began pushing himself around in the water, sending you into another state of panic. 

“Ow, stop scratching me.“ Eren complained, your nails digging into his shoulders

”Then stop moving!” 

“How else are you supposed to learn how to swim, my love!” He laughed, “Here, I’ll help you.” Ignoring your refusals, Eren pried your legs off of his waist and let them float in the water. 

“Okay now start kicking.” He instructed, you gave up and listened for once.

“Ah, good girl,” Eren pried your hand off his shoulders next and held your hands at an arms length away.

You let out a breath, trying to freak out and you kicked your legs like Eren instructed and swim together. Eren continued to praise you as you got the hang of it more and more, a genuine smile splayed across his cheeks as he watched you. 

“You see? Told you it’s not that hard.” He encouraged

”Yeah right, the only reason I’m still afloat is because you’re still holding my hands.” You scoffed.

”Oh yeah? What if I was drowning?” You rolled your eyes at his hypothetical

”Pfft, you’re on your own for that one cause I am not saving you.” 

Eren raised an eyebrow, “We’ll see about that.” Were his final words before he let go of your hands and went underwater. 

You gasped and tried to reach out for him which didn’t work as he floated downward. You kicked and splashed around, trying your best to stay afloat and alive.

”Eren? Eren?! Eren, stop it’s not funny anymore!” You splashed around to try to get his attention but after another couple seconds of silence you began to panic. 

“Eren? ....Stop it, the jokes over I get it...” you looked around you, only got find yourself completely and utterly alone. Slowing down your panicked breathing, you sucked in a deep breath and stopped kicking around, letting yourself fall slowly under the water. 

The sharp stinging of the salty water hit your eyes when you opened them, trying your best to find the brunette. After a couple double takes, the sight of a slow falling body caught your eye and you immediately swam towards it. A wave of fear ran through you when you finally caught up to his body, his eyes closed and his lips not their usual pink color—he looked kind of...dead. 

Wrapping your arms around his waist as he once did early on, you pushed his body higher up to the ocean top, knowing you wouldn’t be able to carry him the whole way yourself without you drowning too. You repeated this process until the moonlight was visible under the water and you finally pulled his up, his body weight falling onto you. 

Multiple curses escaped your lips and adrenaline pumped through your veins, not even feeling the burning in your lungs or the tears in your eyes until you finally reached the rocky sand and dropped Eren’s body onto it. You coughed and started chest compressions.

”What the hell, you crazy bastard?! Jean was right, you’re a suicidal fucking maniac!” You cried, switching between pushing your interlocked hands up and down on his chest and blowing your own oxygen into his lungs. 

“I swear to Ymir fucking Fritz, I will kill you if you die on me, Eren Yeager!” 

Your arms stung, your knees bled, and your head was getting lighter and lighter, not even hearing the distant voice of Armin who called out to you. It didn’t matter how much it hurt, it didn’t matter if you had to rip all the air out of your lungs for him, none of it mattered until he was safe. 

You were always that kind of person. The person who’d take all the breath out of their lungs for others. A lover, a friend, an elder, a child, a stranger or a foe, all human life was precious. Violence never solved the problems of today, Marleyans killed Eldians centuries ago until they themselves were slaughtered and the roles were reversed. For even more centuries Eldians tortured Marleyans, constantly reminding them of what their ancestors had done long before them, and now, again the cycle continues. 

Push up

Push down

Replace his breath with yours

Push up

Push down

Replace his breath with yours

Push up

Push down

Replace his breath with yours

Push up

Push down

Replace her breath with yours

Push up

Push down

Replace her breath with yours

Push up

Push down

Replace her breath with yours 

Hers? Her breath. The breath that was slowly fading more and more. Armin’s voice calling out to you in the distance. It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter. You had to save her. You’ve done it before, why isn’t it working now? Why did they all stop?

Why didn’t it work?

Armin called out to once last time, placing his hand on your shoulder, “Hey...that’s enough. She’s gone.” 

You pushed his hand off your shoulder and shook your head, “No...no, she’s not...she-....Sasha...” you whimpered and went limp in Armin’s arms, the blonde carefully holding your head and shoulders against his chest as you both cried together. 

Questions were all that filled your thoughts. Why did this happen? Why was Sasha the target? She was innocent, she was kind and beautiful and everybody loves her, why did this happen? Who did this? 

Well, who did it was already an answered question. Yes, the simple answer would be the child but, it wasn’t her fault. She didn’t pull the trigger unprovoked and she most certainly wouldn’t be here if the scouts never invaded Marley. And the reason the scouts in invaded Marley was because of....

”Eren...” you pulled away from Armin’s hug and stomped over the back of the airship where Connie had just finished breaking the news. 

You maneuvered around him, ignoring everybody else in your way as your hand impulsively raised and lowered, meeting the side of Eren Yeager’s face. A sharp stinging sensation on your palm snapping you out of your adrenaline high, and it all came crashing down. 

“You killed her! She was my best friend and now she’s dead! All because of you! She didn’t want to come here, I didn’t want to come here but we did. Because of you!” You shouted. 

As much as Levi personally loved throwing Eren around himself, he couldn’t stand you being the one to do it, knowing you’d feel the highest of regret later on. He stepped in, trapping your arms under his as you flailed around trying to get out of his grip.

Anyone who knew the two of you was more than a little shocked at the sight. Hell, even Zeke, who had only heard of you through his brother’s adoring words was shocked. The way Eren spoke of you, even he knew that this outburst was one nobody was expecting. 

By that point, you had already given fighting against an Ackerman and fell limp in Levi’s arms. Although awkward, Levi knew he couldn’t leave you in such a vulnerable state at the moment. 

The ride back home felt like years. Years of avoiding the back room in fear of seeing Sasha’s cold and lifeless corpse laying there, unmoving. Mikasa let you lay on her lap and cry your eyes out, not caring who was listening to you and never judging you for it either. She had lost her best friend too, but she knew she wasn’t alone in this.

Sasha was everyone’s best friend.

Even Eren’s. 

And no matter how cold and distant he seemed, he would always make room in his heart for Sasha. She was...odd, a strong soldier and an amazing asset to the scouts, it didn’t help that she was one of the only people who could make him laugh. It was nice, hearing her and Connie crack jokes that were funny because they weren’t, seeing her make Mikasa and Armin smile, and especially seeing how good of a friend she was to you.

He knew after every argument or every interaction you and him had would immediately be brought to the attention of Sasha and Mikasa. Sometimes, through the cracks of the stone in his cell, he would hear the three of you giggling and whispering about boys.

Through the cracks of the stone in his cell Eren stared. He knew what he had to do in order to protect the people he loved, and to do that he had to distance himself as much as possible from them. Starting with Hange.

They cursed under their breath as they left the room, Eren’s chest clenched but he ignored it and sat on the uncomfortable bed given to him. He didn’t hate Hange. He never could. In fact, he held a high respect for them, but he knew if he needed people to turn away from him and his destructive behavior, he had to start with the one in charge. 

Little did he know, you offered Hange some sleepy tea recommended by Levi and slipped into the basement where he was being held. The brown haired boy flinched and became defensive at the sound of keys jingling, getting ready to attack when necessary but relaxed when the warm colored light illuminated your face. 

He sighed and looked away, “What are you doing here?” You gulped and unlocked in cell, closing the door behind you and standing over him. Eren didn’t look up from his seat on the bed, choosing to stare at concrete floor instead of your eyes that were filling with tears.

”I’m sorry.” 

Eren shook his head, “For what?” 

“I hit you. A-and I know I was upset about....but that’s not excuse. I shouldn’t have put my hands on you, no matter what.” Looking up at you, Eren noticed your eyes downcast trying to hide the tears streaming down your face. 

He cursed himself mentally and stood up sharply. You gasped at the sudden movement and looked at him, not expecting him to yank you into a hug, his head in your neck. Immediately, you wrapped your arms around him and let go of the breath you were holding. 

“You were right.” He spoke up

”What?”

”To hit me. You had every right to.” You tried to pull away to look him in the face but couldn’t escape his strong grip. 

Ever since you all went to Marley, Eren had been acting different. Even before Sasha’s death, his eyes seemed duller, darker, he didn’t seem to care about the innocent lives he took. He barley even looked you in the eye despite not seeing each other for months. 

“What? No, why would you say that? You would never put your hands on me so I shouldn’t have either, where is this coming from?” You questioned 

“I saw it. I saw her die.” Eren mumbled, finally letting you pulled away. ”When I got in control of my Titan more, I saw it. I saw the future, I saw Sasha die and I thought I could stop it but...” You didn’t waste any time in sitting Eren down once more and wrapping your arms around him, letting him lean on your chest. 

Millions of thoughts were running through your head but all you cared about was making sure he was okay. And considering everything you had all found out in the past 4 years, it wasn’t as surprising to find out he could see into the future. 

For those little moments of silence, you ran your hands through his, now long brown hair and let him relax. There wasn’t any time for Eren to “relax” recently sand there wasn’t much you could do to help him considering you never knew what was going through his head, but for those few minutes were all he needed. 

All he needed to act selfishly. 

Eren suddenly pulled away from you and held your face in his large hands, “Do you trust me?” 

“Huh?” 

”Do. You. Trust. Me?” He repeated sharply

”Yes? Yes, of course I do.” You reassured him and maybe even yourself.

”After tonight you can hate me forever, or you can follow me forever, it’s your choice. But I won’t stay here.” He said, you shook your head, trying to figure out what he was trying to say.

”W-What? Eren, don’t tell me...” 

Eren took a deep breath and leaned in, pressing his lips into yours as if it’d be the last time he would. 

“I’m sorry...”

”Wha-“ 

With a sharp sting on your neck, your words were paused as Eren punched a thin syringe into your neck. You opened your mouth to speak but the artificial melatonin pumped through your veins quicker than you could think, finally taking a toll and allowing you to fall limos in Eren’s arms. Not catching the single tear that fell from his left eye. 

When you awoke, keys and yelling filled your ears before your sight did. As your eyes fluttered open, you found Commander Hange standing over you in both fear and anger, calling your name.

”Cadet! Where did he go?! Where did Eren go? Did you let him out? Did he escape? How did you get in?” All sorts of questions were thrown your way.

But nothing could shake the stake in your heart at the hands of Eren Yeager. Though...this won’t be the last time you’d be feeling that. 

[olivinesea]

Oooh fun! Okay, do you have any headcannons or thoughts on a dyslexic Hotch? I feel like I never see dyslexia with any characters really, and I like the idea of him with it. And if you do and you want to write something about it, a dyslexic Hotch with the team (and them being the supportive and protective family they are?) Thank you! ❤️

I hope you have fun, wherever/whatever you’re doing!!

I love this so much!! Thank you :) okay I don’t have much personal experience with dyslexia so hopefully I get this decently accurate. The biggest thing that surprised me when I was doing a quick search is that it isn’t actually a matter of reading words or letters backwards? It’s more an inability to connect letters to the appropriate sounds or to break words up into component parts; a general phonological awareness struggle.

So, as with many things, it seems to me to be a matter of slowing down, learning at your own pace. This ties in nicely with so many of my other Hotch thoughts, I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of it before. Idk what this is, it’s neither headcanon nor proper story but hopefully it’s something like what you were looking for:

When he’s a kid he gets called a slow learner due to his undiagnosed dyslexia. It was much less common to get that kind of diagnosis back then in general and I am sure his dad would have hated the idea of his son needing any kind of extra help. So he’s slow to speak, slow to learn how to read, has difficulty with numbers, absolutely hates being called on to read out loud because it’s actual torture and the other kids have no hesitation about laughing at him. So he becomes withdrawn, labeled a “bad kid,” stops trying because, fuck it, he never gets any kind of support, who cares right? It’s always a fight at home, he starts hiding his work, lying about his grades. This works for awhile bc his parents are distracted by other things. His problems are much bigger than grades by the time they do notice.

However, while he hates school and the way people talk about him and his struggles, like he isn’t even there, he discovers that he doesn’t hate learning. There’s a small library in town where he found he could hide out, no one bothering him for hours if he just sat still for with a book open. He was good at sitting still, at being invisible. But eventually a librarian notices that he’s always got the same book open, some sort of technical manual, that he is rarely turning the pages. She asks him if he likes what he’s reading. He’s just alarmed to be spoken to, afraid that being noticed means he will soon no longer have this sanctuary. He nods and tries to bluff his way through but it’s obvious he hasn’t read it, despite having looked at it for weeks straight. The librarian doesn’t say anything outright, just lets him be for now.

Next time she sees him she brings him a different book, a collection of Grimms fairy tales. He wants to complain that it’s for little kids but is too nervous to refuse it. She asks if she can read him her favorite story from it. It’s dark and twisted and fantastical and he can’t help but be drawn in by it. He’s sad when she’s done reading, wants to hear it again, to capture all the details to replay to himself later. She shows him where it starts, encourages him to read it himself. He doesn’t look at her bc he doesn’t want her to see how upset he is by that, already frustrated by the anticipation that he won’t be able to get through it. But she stays with him, helping him where he gets stuck, asking him questions about the story, making sure it’s making sense to him.

They slowly work their way through the whole collection over the course of months. They spend days on each story, repeating it until he’s confident, she never makes him feel like he’s taking too long or wasting her time. Sometimes has to reread a section multiple times, gets hung up on the language rather than the story but it’s okay, she gives him a notebook to copy down parts that spin too loudly in his mind, saving them and also releasing him from their hold so he can move forward. She lets him keep the book, tells him it was too old to stay in circulation anyway, they had a new copy on order already. She’s the first person who was patient with him, that showed him he could do it, he just needed a little more time, a little more practice than other kids.

In college this is part of why he spends so much time at the library. Part of it is his natural inclination to overwork himself, push until he’s given more than he can in hopes that it might be almost enough. He knows he’s never been enough, why would that change just because he’s in a new place? But the other part is he simply needs more time to get through the coursework, to make it through the excessive amounts of reading he’s assigned. Some other students don’t even bother to read but he would never do that, he makes sure that he not only reads every chapter assigned but he reads it again, takes notes, highlights, annotates, does everything in his power to be prepared. Sure he might work himself to the point of exhaustion, to the point where he makes himself sick (though he’ll try to deny that too) but he’s never caught trying to read something while others wait for his answer, the letters and sounds meaningless, slipping away from him faster the more eyes he feels turn towards him, wondering what could be taking so long. No one ever gets the chance to laugh at him for being slow in college, he never allows them to see that side of him.

As an adult, the leader of the BAU, he’s too well respected for anyone to dare laugh at him but he still hates feeling unprepared. This ends up looking like long nights in the office, reviewing case files to the point of memorization, so that he won’t have to read any of it in front of his team. He can if he has to, he’s developed skills over the years, ways to calm the panic that only makes it harder, can fake it well enough that no one would really notice. Until one day, distracted by a migraine and the fallout of some fight with Haley, he gets stuck. He can’t remember something and he tries to read the sentence that has the information but the stupid word just won’t resolve into sounds that make sense and he just stops talking. He’s glaring at the form like it might catch fire. No one says anything for a moment while he tries to refocus, tries to work around echoes of laughter, decades long past but always ready to jump out at him if he lets his guard down, allows a mistake, a tired moment to derail the image of perfect competence that he’s built around himself. Penelope jumps in, finishing the thought, completing the list of traits shared by the victims. He forces himself to smile at her because he really is grateful, it wasn’t her fault. She scrunches her nose at him, dismissing his silent thanks with a toss of her head. It was nothing, everyone needs a little assist now and then.

No one brings it up and he doubles his efforts not to let anyone see. But he’s so tired on the plane coming back from a case, he’s been staring the same forms for an hour at least. He can feel his ears turning red with frustration. There’s really no reason he has to do this now but the fact that his mind is refusing, almost seems to be teasing him, makes him dig in harder. Emily sits down opposite him, pulling the folder away without asking. He’s about to say something sharp, something he’ll regret saying to her when he really means it for himself, but the expression on her face is so odd, smiling with a frown between her eyebrows. It isn’t pity, she respects him far too much, but there is curiosity and something else, something soft.

“Drink with me.” She slides him a glass and they don’t talk, just look out the window, look at the light playing off the ice in their glasses. He doesn’t see the file again until it appears on his desk, every form neatly filled out, the places needing his signature flagged. All but the last spot, where she’s signed his name eerily perfectly, difficult for even him to see that it’s not his own. Just so he knows she can if she wants to. Equal parts offer and threat.

Penelope and Reid start a book club. Derek joins right away. Emily rolls her eyes when she’s invited, muttering something about spending her free time on more work but they know she will join. Rossi flat out refuses to read the books but offers his house for meetings. Hotch hesitates, wanting to say yes but nervous to commit to an activity like that. He loves books, loves to talk about books. He doesn’t love a time limit on books.

The next time they have to drive to a case, Derek puts on a copy of the audiobook. It’s the first time they make it to a destination without any bickering from the backseat. They don’t get through the whole thing but later he finds a copy of the audiobook on his desk, complete with a disc player and headphones.

A different month, Reid tells him about how his mother always used to read him books and somehow finesses an offer to read to Hotch without him even realizing he’s accepted it. So Spencer comes in to Hotch’s office on lunch breaks occasionally and reads to him whatever the book of the month is. He loves it, remembering the first person who read to him, how shocked he’d been to be treated with patience, with understanding and wondering how he got so lucky to be surrounded by people like her, so ready to support him, wanting him there with them rather than off alone, uselessly fighting with himself to prove his self sufficiency over some uncooperative letters.

Okay, that was so much more than I was planning on but here we are. I hope you liked it and thank you SO much for the idea. If you ever have any others you want to share I am totally here for it. :)

Send me requests!

[reidamancy]

ghost of you || spencer reid

summary: You helplessly witness Spencer cope with a loss on the anniversary of the event, unable to help him. (spencer reid x fem bau!reader)

category: angst

warnings: death

word count: 2.8k

a/n: wow apparently i only know how to write angst lmao i’m sorry in advance

MASTERLIST

It’s been a year since the incident. You knew the anniversary would be especially hard for Spencer, so you wanted to be with him today. 

You slipped onto your side of the bed and watched his chest rise and fall as he lightly snored. You studied his face and noticed how peaceful he looked. That’s all you wished for him. To be at peace. But you knew that once he was conscious, his emotions would take over his mind like a violent storm.

You reached out and brushed your hand through his curls. He stirred, shocking you. You sat back as you watched his eyes flutter open. His eyes were glossy as they stared at you. No words were exchanged, but it felt as if the two of you deeply connected in that moment.

You reached out to hold his cheek, but he stayed still. You bit your lip, wanting to say something but you knew it wouldn’t make a difference. You rubbed your thumb along his cheekbone as you cradled his face in your palm. The two of you stayed there for a while. You, silently comforting him, and him staring back at you emptily. 

This was not what wanted, but there was nothing you could do to change it. 

After a while, he slowly got out of bed and started getting ready for the day. You stayed in bed, hands folded across your stomach as you stared at the ceiling. You wished things were different. You wished you could go back in time, just to relive that moment. But, knowing what you did now, you wouldn’t have changed the outcome. 

Before you could recount the events that happened one year ago today, Spencer emerged from the shower. You turned around as he was getting dressed. Once he was done, he quickly grabbed his keys and left his apartment, with you trailing right behind him. 

He called Hotch to ask him for the day off. It was an unusual request from Reid, but one look at the calendar and Hotch understood. He knew the significance of today, so he let Reid off the hook and wished him well.

Spencer left a space next to him when he walked. You eagerly filled it, remembering what it was like before the incident. You smiled as your arms occasionally bumped during the walk, but Spencer didn’t feel it. With his head down and hands in his pockets, he was deep in thought. And you wanted nothing more than to pull him away from his swirling mind.

Before you knew it, you were in front of the library the two of you frequented. You let out a sigh and placed a hand on his shoulder. He shivered as he walked in. 

You aimlessly followed him for the next hour. He roamed around the library, picking up random books, flicking through the pages, then returning them to their shelves. It wasn’t until you saw the titles that you realized his choices were anything but random. He had chosen your favorite books; they were your favorites because they were his recommendations that you read for the first time in this very library. 

There were copies of all these books at home, with your handwriting adorning the margins. You had left little notes to yourself and Spencer if either of you decided to reread them. Spencer had reread these books multiple times just to see your comments and reactions to the plot, how you circled words you didn’t know and highlighted your favorite parts. His eidetic memory had seared these books into his mind, but the notes you left felt new every time he read them.

After placing the last book back on the bookshelf, he stared at one of the library tables. You followed his gaze and realized it was your table. The table the two of you would sit at every time you came here. You smiled at all the memories that occurred there. You walked over and took your usual seat, knowing he’d follow. 

When he sat down, he took a deep breath. You could hear the sadness in his exhale and you fought the urge to reach out and hold his hands. But your hands stayed glued to your lap. 

He looked everywhere but you. His eyes scanned the room as if he was memorizing this moment, but you knew his mind was somewhere else. 

“Y/N,” he croaked. It was barely audible, and it was the first time you heard his voice today. 

“I’m here, Spence.” You shot him a smile. 

He lowered his eyes and sniffled. 

You knew you had to get him out of here, this place was too painful. “Let’s get some coffee,” you urged. Spencer stayed in his seat.

You stared at the young doctor as he played with his hands. Spencer sat there for a while. You could only assume he was soaking in this library and all the memories associated with it. When his first tear fell, he knew he had to leave. He swiped away the tear as quick as it came and hurriedly left the library, with you following him to his next destination.

His feet must have had a mind of their own because he looked bewildered when he saw the front door of the coffee shop the two of you would go to every morning. This shop was on your way to work, and Spencer needed his daily caffeine fix so it only made sense. The bell on top of the door dinged as he entered. The comforting smell of coffee surrounded Spencer as he got up to the counter and ordered his usual. He took a seat by the window, and you sat down across from him. As he was waiting for his order he heard the barista call out, “One caramel macchiato!”

You smiled at each other. That was your order. But the two of you stayed in your seats with sad smiles as you watched a woman pick up her macchiato and leave the shop. You turned back towards Spencer and saw he was staring at something. You followed his eyes to the sugar table. In that moment you knew what he was thinking and you smiled, remembering the same thing.

“Spencer!” You gaped at your boyfriend, staring at your drink that was now splattered across the floor. You had dropped it just as soon as you got it after colliding into Spencer.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N!” He laughed. He dropped down to the floor and started wiping up the mess with napkins. 

As he got back on his feet, you lightly smacked his shoulder. “It’s not funny!” You looked at your watch. “We need to be at work in 10 minutes.”

“Here, you can have mine.”

You eyed him carefully. “You’re giving up your caffeine?” You asked, eyebrows raised.

He laughed again. “I think you need it more than me.”

You took his cup into your hands and took a sip. You grimaced as the bitter liquid hit your tongue. “Jesus Christ, how can you drink this?!”

You emptied sugar packet after sugar packet into Spencer’s black coffee, never completely satisfied with the taste. 

“Y/N, we have to go!”

“Well we wouldn’t be late if someone didn’t make me drop my coffee.”

Spencer rolled his eyes. “Come on, there’s got to be a three-inch layer of sugar in that cup by now.”

You looked him directly in the eyes as you emptied another packet into the cup.

“Y/N!” He giggled.

You couldn’t help but laugh as well. “Okay, okay let’s go!”

“Hotch is going to kill us.” Spencer laughed as he wrapped an arm around your shoulder and pressed a quick kiss on your cheek. 

You smiled at the memory, remembering it as if it were yesterday. Then you looked over to Spencer and saw his lip quivering. You sighed and placed your hand on his. He didn’t feel it.

His order was called and he quickly went up to get it. He gave the barista a quick thank you and made his way out of the shop. Across from the coffee shop was a florist. Spencer almost smiled at the convenience. He took one look at the sign and decided it was time. You followed him as Spencer crossed the road and made his way into the flower shop.

He took his time and slowly passed by all the flowers, basking in their scent. You trailed behind him, occasionally reaching out to the flowers that caught your eye. By the time he reached the cashier, he decided to buy a bouquet of carnations. White for innocence, red for love, and pink for remembrance.

After leaving the flower shop, each step Spencer took felt heavy. He decided against using the subway because he needed more time. He was stalling and he knew it. He wasn’t sure if he was ready, and he needed to gather his thoughts and emotions. So he took the long way, walking the entire distance. You walked next to Spencer, watching his face, trying to read his thoughts. But he was unreadable. So you walked in silence as you got closer and closer to your destination. 

The two of you entered the cemetery and you took a deep breath. Spencer’s lip was caught in between his teeth. You held his hand in attempt to comfort him but that didn’t calm his nerves. He wandered around the cemetery, unsure of where to go, until he found the grave he was looking for. 

Y/N Y/L/N

He took a deep breath and sat down in front of your headstone. You smiled as you welcomed him for the first time.

He gently placed the flowers against your grave and cleared his throat. “Hi Y/N.” His voice was weak and barely above a whisper.

You leaned on the stone and smiled. “Hi Spence.”

Tears began to steadily fall down his cheeks. You frowned as you got up to wipe them away. “No, please don’t cry.” You said as you crouched in front of him and held his face in your hands. You swiped your thumb across his cheeks, but your finger made no difference as the tears continued their descent down his face. It was an aching reminder of your phantom form. You sighed as you sat back against your headstone and watched your lover, unable to hold him despite your deepest desires.

He looked at the ground. “I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

You shook your head. “Don’t be.”

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t at your funeral. I couldn’t bring myself to come.” Spencer choked on a sob. “It was just too painful.”

You smiled and nodded. “I know, baby. It’s okay.”

“I... I hope it wasn’t disrespectful. I love, loved, you more than anything, Y/N. But I wasn’t ready. I’m still not. You were gone too soon.”

You felt your own eyes fill with tears. 

“And I’m sorry I haven’t said goodbye... I haven’t even acknowledged your death because,” Spencer trailed off. He blinked the tears out of his eyes and bit his lip. “Because sometimes I feel like you’re still with me.” 

You reached out and grabbed his hand, but he couldn’t feel it. “I am. I always will be.” You said through tears.

“I haven’t touched anything. Our room is still the same. I leave a space for you on your side of the bed. Your side of the bathroom is still the same.” Spencer let out a sad laugh. “That can’t be healthy considering it’s been so long, but I just can’t explain it Y/N.”

He took a deep breath and continued. “I’ve never loved anyone as much as I loved you and I can’t believe you’re gone.” His voice cracked and tears were now streaming down your cheeks. 

“I love you too, Spencer. So much.”

“You know, its common in many belief systems that spirits cannot move on from our realm until all its goodbyes are made. I hope I’m not keeping you here.”

You smiled and laughed. “It’s okay, I like watching over you.”

“I’m sorry it took so long for me to do this. I just didn’t want it to be real. But it’s been long enough, and I need to face reality.” Spencer hung his head and sighed. “It’s selfish of me. I’m still trying to hold on to you, but you deserve to move on. Wherever you are, I hope you are at peace. That’s all I want for you.”

You scoffed. “You first.”

Spencer cleared his throat. “I know it looks bad... For someone who’s claimed to love you I haven’t really shown it since you died... But you have to know how much I love you. You had to know while you were still alive, and that’s what matters.” He was choking on his sobs as you silently cried.

“I know, I know Spencer. God, I wish I could tell you how much I love you.”

“Y/N, I couldn’t deal with your death for so long because I needed a future with you. I made plans, right after that case. I was so sure, Y/N.” Spencer reached into his pocket and pulled out a black velvet box. You gasped as you covered your mouth to stop the sobs from escaping you, not that he would have heard them.

He opened the box to reveal a gorgeous diamond ring. He sniffled and said, “I got this before we went on that case. I held onto it the entire time, just in case. I was going to take you out once we got back. But you never came back with me.” Spencer sobbed freely now and you joined him. The fact that he had the ring with him in your final moments broke your heart.

“Oh my God, Spencer...” You cried into your hand, heart aching at the future you could have had with the love of your life.

“I’ve been carrying it around with me ever since. I know, it’s not healthy, I mean, it’s been a year. But it’s a constant reminder of you, Y/N. You’re always on my mind. Or at least, in my pocket.”

You let out a small chuckle between your tears. You couldn’t believe it. You moved towards Spencer and straddled his lap. You sobbed as you held his face in your hands. Spencer made no movement as he stared at your headstone. Unbeknownst to him, you were littering his face with kisses as you hugged him tightly. “I love you so much, Spencer Reid.”

Spencer stared at the ring and sighed. "It should have been me.” He cried.

You shook your head. “No, Spencer I’d take a bullet for you any day. You deserve the happiest life,” You rested your forehead against his. “And the world needs you, genius.” You smiled to yourself as you imagined how his skin would feel against yours in this moment.

He wiped the tears off his cheeks and stood up. You got up with him and stood next to him. He was staring at your headstone. You wrapped your arms around one of his and leaned your head on his shoulder. You sighed, wishing you could breathe in his scent and feel his warmth right now. 

“I’m sorry it took me so long to say goodbye, Y/N. I miss you. More than you’ll ever know.”

He crouched down and pulled some of the grass out of the way. He used his hands to dig up some dirt and placed the closed box into the shallow hole he made. He buried your encased ring and patted down the dirt. “Goodbye... my wife.”

You let out a whimper. You let your mind imagine flashes of a life where you marry Spencer, which only intensified your cries. Then, you looked down at your grave and saw a bright light emitting from it. The ground shifted as a portal-like door appeared in front of you. You looked to Spencer in confusion, but he seemed unfazed as he continued to stare at your grave. You were the only one who could see it. Realization hit that this must be the other side. Your last tie to the mortal world had just been severed and it was time to move on.

You looked back at Spencer and felt tears fall down your face. “Spence. I know you can’t hear me but I need you to listen. Please. Catch all the unsubs for me. Find a pretty girl. Start a family. Do everything we would have done and live your life. We’ll meet again... my husband.” You kissed him right on the lips, sobbing at the empty feeling you got once your lips made contact. He looked straight ahead, unaware of your affection. 

You turned and faced the door, now glowing with immense brightness. You stepped closer to it, anxious to meet what was waiting for you on the other side. You turned around, looking at Spencer’s face one last time, then stepped into the brightness.

[krreader]

final opportunity.

pairing: kim taehyung x reader fandom: bts warnings: language  genre: angst ; fluff word count: 2.2k+

summary: there had been countless of opportunities for him and you, but you missed them over and over again. now, will be your final one before you and him truly had no future anymore.

a/n: I think I re-wrote this like ten times because I had too many ideas on how to begin this, but I’m really happy with how it turned out now. I hope you guys like it too!!!!

You shouldn't feel this way.

If your best friend tells you that he plans on proposing to his girlfriend, you should feel excited and over the moon for him, not like he had just stabbed your heart with a knife.

So why was that? Why did you feel that way after countless of years of friendship?

Was it that kiss that you had shared when you were teenagers because you wanted to 'practice' for future partners? Was it that first night that you had spent together because neither of you 'trusted anyone else with it'? Or maybe it was that drunk confession that he had made five years ago as you were dating someone else, that confession that you had shrugged off as drunk behavior and he had never brought up again, only shortly after finding his own partner, whereas you broke off your relationship only two months later.

Which of these moments had made you think that maybe, one day, you would be more than his best friend?

“(Y/N)? Did you... hear what I said?” Taehyung's hand on your shoulder made you snap out of it, looking up into his eyes.

“Yes,” you nodded, taking a deep breath, then you gently pushed off his hand, but you still forced yourself to smile, “That's great news, Tae.”

“Are.. you sure? You don't seem to be so happy.”

And you hated yourself for that. A true friend would not think so selfishly, but yet here you were..

“I'm happy,” you lied, “I'm so happy for you,” and so that he wouldn't see straight through the lie, you simply pulled him into an embrace and hid the tears that welled up in your eyes.

You could feel him tighten his arms around you, letting out a sigh.

“It's a big step,” he whispered, “I hope it's the right one.”

It sounded like he was unsure about it himself, but despite your wants, you didn't want to say anything that day. If this was the path that he wanted to choose, then who were you to deny him his happiness? You'd rather get your heart broken than break his by ruining what you had now.

Normally, if your best friend told you that he'd get married, that'd be the only topic to be discussed that night. But both of you seemed to silently agree that you weren't ready to fully talk about it yet. That should have been another red flag for you, that Taehyung wasn't doing this for the right reasons, but you didn't have it in you to talk about it, not now.

And so you talked about everything and anything, but not about his upcoming proposal.

And even after he left, the days that followed after that night, you two barely exchanged ten messages in total.

You, because you couldn't. Every time you so much as thought about him, you ended up sobbing about a future that could have been if you have had the guts to tell him about your feelings. But now you were too late and he had found someone else.

Him, because he didn't know what to say. That he had doubts? That he wished things had gone differently with you? No. He couldn't do that, he wasn't the type of man to do that while he was still with someone else, he had too much respect for his partner.

And so weeks went by and eventually, you stopped talking completely.

Your feelings had ultimately destroyed your friendship after all, without you even confessing to him.

At that point, you were actually sure that he had already gone through with it and the more you thought about it, the more miserable you became.

That is until you got a phone call.

“(Y/N)?”

“Huh?” the voice of Taehyung's mother made you sit up in bed, “Are you okay? Is Taehyung okay?!”

She let out a snort, “You young kids really are going to be the death of me. I never understood why he just couldn't tell you what he felt when he was a teenager.”

She had always been very involved with the two of you, the typical 'You two would make a good couple' or 'I know you'll get married eventually' things that mothers liked to say. But as far as you knew, she actually really liked Taehyung's new girlfriend.

“We're not teenagers anymore, though.”

“I doubt that very much, sometimes,” she lowered her voice at the thing she was about to say next, “Listen to me. You don't have a lot of time, so I'm going to make this quick. Two days ago, Taehyung came by and told us about his plan for the proposal. We... gave him our blessing, but he talked to me in private afterwards. He told me about his doubts. That he is afraid that he's making a mistake.”

“He's not making a mistake, he found a woman that he loves.”

“Yes, but not a woman that he is IN love with. That role belongs to someone else and has for years and you know it, (Y/N),” she let out a heavy sigh, “Both of you have always come up with excuses, that you were simply friends with a strong bond, but you and I know that there is much more to it than that. I told him that if he had doubts, he shouldn't do it, that he should be honest with himself and be with the woman that he truly wants to be with.”

You pushed the blankets aside, beginning to nimble on your lower lip as you walked over to the window, “What... did he say?”

“He said that there is no use. That when he confessed to you years ago, you didn't seem to feel the same way.”

“He remembers that? He was so drunk.”

“He wasn't. He pretended like he was, because he felt like you had rejected him and to save your friendship, he had to come up with an excuse.”

And because you were a little tipsy yourself, you didn't even realize that he was lying all along.

Fuck.

“Oh god,” you crouched down, the earth around you suddenly spinning and turning.

“I love my son more than I can say, (Y/N), and I want him to be happy for the rest of his life. And I know that if he's about to go through with that proposal, he won't be.”

“But what am I supposed to do now? It's too late!”

“I'll text you the address. He plans on proposing there in two hours. If you hurry, you can still make it in time and tell him what you feel for him... you can still show him that you want him too.”

And the moment her text came in, you grabbed your keys and wallet and started running.

It was too far away to take public transportation and you most certainly couldn't go there on foot, so you jumped into the nearest taxi and begged the driver to go as fast as he could.

So many things were running through your mind that it was hard to pinpoint an exact emotion you were feeling in that moment.

You just hoped that his mother hadn't read too much into it and that he really felt the same for you that you felt for him.

At the same time, guilt was eating you up alive that you were about to ruin the chance for his girlfriend to marry him, but... if he didn't love her, truly love her... then she didn't deserve that anyways.

It took nearly an hour until you finally made it to the hotel, sprinting into the lobby and checking your phone once again, rereading the message that his mother had sent you.

“He plans to do it on the rooftop.”

And so instead of taking the elevator, you sprinted up the flights of stairs, the adrenaline that was pumping through your veins being the sole reason you even made it up there, completely out of breath when you finally made it to the top and pushed the doors open.

And there he was, turning around in surprise, as countless of rose petals were surrounding him, as well as multiple lit candles, the approaching sunset in the back making this truly the most romantic proposal anyone could wish for.

And once again, you hesitated.

“(Y/N)? What are you doing here?!” his eyes were wide.

“I...-” you had practiced what you had wanted to say in the car, but now that you were looking at him, none of those words seemed to be the right ones.

He waited for a few moments, his chest heaving heavily like he was anxious about what would come out of your mouth, but when you didn't respond, he finally let out a sigh and shook his head, “You should leave. She's about to be here any moment now.”

“No, wait,” you took a deep breath, then you took a few steps forward until you were right in front of him, “I should have said what I'm about to say years ago and I am so fucking sorry that I'm only doing this now, Tae.”

And as if he knew, he immediately shook his head, “Don't... please don't.”

“I love you, Kim Taehyung,” but you said it with a smile, despite the tear that rolled out of your eye, because it felt so good to finally be honest with yourself, “I have ever since I was 16, but I never thought that you could ever feel the same way for me, despite the kiss, despite... everything else. When you told me you loved me that night and I laughed it off, I thought you were drunk, because you knew that I was dating someone, so why would you do that? Why would you tell me that you loved me, when you knew that I was with someone else?” you let out a snort, “Yet here I am... doing the exact same thing. How the tables have turned...”

His eyes were so sad when he looked at you that it almost broke your spirit right there, “Why are you doing this?”

“Because I'm hoping that you might still feel the same way for me. Because if you do, then... then I don't want you to do this. It wouldn't be right.”

And the longer it took him to reply, the more your shoulders slumped.

Eventually, he closed his eyes, his head falling forward as he rubbed his temples with his fingers.

“I think you should go.”

And see, that wasn't what you had expected, but should have. Just because you asked him to, didn't mean that he would drop everything for you. You had took too much time and now it was too late.

You were about to lose him and could do nothing but watch.

The love of your life, slipping through your fingers like sand.

“But..-”

“Please, (Y/N). Go,” he looked back up into your eyes, “Please go.”

Your mouth opened and closed again and again, tears now streaming out of your eyes as the realization hit you that you were too late.

There was nothing left to do.

You had tried.. but he had made his decision, rightfully so, and now you had to accept that.

You had no other choice but to do.

And so you turned around and reached for the handle of the door. The last thing you said to him, that you thought would be the last thing you'd ever say to him was: “I hope you find happiness, Taehyung. Truly,” and then you left.

You wandered around the city for hours on end, not quite ready yet to drive back.

Eventually you found a quiet spot at a beach and sat down at a lonely bench, your eyes falling on the hotel that your best friend, the love of your life, was currently proposing to his girlfriend.

You didn't remember how long you sat there and stared at the building, you didn't remember how many tears landed on your pants and stained them and you didn't remember your way back home from how hard it was to see through all the pain.

Life had to go on, but for the first day and the following, it didn't.

It was as if it just... stopped.

His last words still ringing in your ears, his expression branded into your mind and every time you closed your eyes, you saw him looking at you like that.

But you didn’t want to remember him, or your time spent together, with this image as the main picture. You wanted to remember the cheerful boy that had brought you so much happiness in the last years... not the heartbreak.

You fell into a huge hole that nobody was able to pull you out of but yourself. 

And one other person.

When the doorbell rang, you thought it was the delivery guy that you had ordered from twenty minutes ago, but when you opened the door, you were surprised and shocked to see the one that you were sure you'd never see again.

Your eyes widened, “What... are you doing here?”

He looked as anxious as he had the night when you had surprised him. But with one deep breath, he took all the courage he had to say the things he needed to say to you.

“I broke it off. That night... at the rooftop... after you left, I cleaned everything up and I... broke up with her,” Taehyung gulped down hard, “When you told me you loved me, I was happy, you know? And I felt so guilty for feeling that way, when I was about to ask someone else to marry me. I asked you to leave, because of that guilt, because I thought that if you just left, it would be easier. But then I started to think about the future and no matter how hard I tried, there was only one woman in my future and it... just wasn't her. It has never been her.”

You had started crying halfway through, “Why now? Why not sooner?”

“I took some time to think, to really be sure. And I am, (Y/N). I am so sure,” he shed a few tears himself when he cupped your face, “It's you... and it always has been.”

And then all you two could do was hold each other while crying into the embrace of the other.