#and yes of course it’s about rescuing cas but everybody’s already talked about that

[soullessjack]

me incoherently yapping about how the revival should be a prodigal son type of thing between jack and dean to pick up from how season 14 frames them as Abraham and Isaac and have actual reconciliation between them since we never fully got it by the end of s15

[hekate1308]

Negotiations

More Season 12 AU, and yes, this time there’s a plot. Enjoy!

It happens on a hunt, because, as Dean put it, “Turns out we still have those. Good old-fashioned hunts!”

The ghost they are dealing with turns out to be a Vila, the spirit of a young woman who died disappointed in love, who now targets men by making them dance with her until they perish.

Unfortunately, she decides to target Dean, who, since he’s in love with someone else, is utterly immune to her charms.

They underestimated her powers however, because she manages to whisk him away from the rest of them and throw fog across the whole forest they’re hunting her in.

Mick finds Dean, alone, but only to watch as the Vila, furious, plunges her hand into his chest.

“Dean!”

He shoots her with rock salt and runs to his fallen – friend’s? – side.

He coughs up blood as Mick falls down to his knees, terrified.

“Was stupid... need to update... lore...”

“Dean, you shouldn’t – “

“Tell them – tell Cas – “

He coughs again.

“Best years... of my... life...”

“You’re not what – “

“What? No, no – “

Only later will he realize Crowley sounds genuinely distressed.

Mick turns around.

“Do something!”

“I can’t!”

“You’re the King of Hell!”

“There are rules – “

He thinks quickly.

“Make a deal with me.”

“What?”

“My soul, take it.”

Crowley looks at him.

“Give me ten dollars.”

He has no idea where this is going but tears out his wallet. Crowley grabs the money and yanks him into a bruising kiss.

It’s over so quickly he doesn’t understand what’s happening until Dean sits up, completely fine, and the fog has dispelled.

“I added getting rid to the Vila to our deal. You should have thought of that, really.”

“How much time do I have?”

“What do you mean?” Crowley waves the ten dollar bill at him.

“We’re even.”

“Did you seriously just save my life for ten bucks?” Dean asks, getting up, squeezing Mick’s shoulder.

“Thank you but next time, think a little bit harder about throwing your soul away, okay?”

“It’s not throwing it away if it means saving you.”

Realizing what he’s said, he steps away, blushing once more, but before Dean can reply, Cas and Sam burst into the scene and the former throws himself into Dean’s arms.

That evening, Mick watches Dean and Cas preparing dinner. The hunter is already laughing again, carefree, happy.

No one would guess Dean Winchester almost died just a few hours ago.

He’s mesmerizing.

“It’s not going to get you a one-way ticket to Hell, take it from me.”

“What do you mean?” Mick asks, looking away.

Crowley rolls his eyes.

“It’s okay to be attracted. I’m pretty sure the Winchesters are the cause of gay crisis in at least 25% of the witnesses they interview.”

“I’m not...” he trails off.

“I’m not homosexual.”

“Don’t have to be to appreciate a nice view, Captain Peachfuzz.”

Until now he’s been spared one of Crowley’s nicknames. Although maybe “spared” is the wrong diction for it.

It’s more like he’s passed a milestone of some kind.

“Still, it’s not like... he’s very...”

“Obnoxious? Much Plaid wearing? Annoying?”

Mick ignores the suggestions.

“Come on, work with me here.”

“You’re the King of Hell” he points out.

“And yet you’re content enough to sit at a table with me. Your point?”

It’s true. Once they rescued him, he didn’t think twice about Crowley’s presence. He’s a great help on hunts, and he’s really not that bad for a demon.

Say what you want, he did kill Lucifer as well.

“Just a statement”.

“Here”.

Crowley offers him a glass of Craig. He accepts, but sips it slowly, remembering the evening Dean and Sam had to bring him to bed.

“What you did today... It was... nice.”

“I’m just a nice person”.

He almost spits his drink all over the table. Crowley chuckles.

“Now, you almost sound as if you don’t believe me. I’m offended.”

“Nothing offends you.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that.”

It’s easy to forget all the things Crowley must have done over the centuries when you’re just talking to him like this.

Still, he has been nothing but helpful, and without him, Dean wouldn’t be alive.

Cas has made abundantly clear that he’s aware of it, going so far as to hug the King of Hell.

To his credit, he didn’t even flinch.

“Do you have any idea what the Men of Letters are planning?”

Yes, he did something right today, but Mick still knows what this question is supposed to be.

Another test.

“No” he answers honestly.

“Dr. Hess never lets anyone know what to do until the very moment it needs to be done.”

“Hm” Crowley hums. “Very inefficient way to run a business.”

“Efficient when it’s founded on terror and guilt.”

“Speak for yourself.”

“All I know is that everyone needs to be very careful”.

He’s only spent two months with them, but he already cannot imagine going back.

This... all of this... It’s insane. Overwhelming. Downright mad at times.

And he can’t imagine a better life.

“Oh, Peachfuzz, no one here’s ever careful. Doesn’t mean they don’t look after one another.”

They finish their drinks in silence.

Crowley expects the knock on his door that night, so when Dean shuffles in, he only raises an eyebrow.

“Squirrel. Trouble sleeping, again?”

“Thank you, Crowley. You didn’t have to do that.”

“Don’t be absurd. We both know I did.”

It’s something he’s never admitted, not even to himself.

Crowley, the King of Hell, couldn’t stand a world without Dean Winchester in it, and it’s going to become a problem eventually. Inevitably.

But for now, Dean is standing in front of him, unharmed and healthy.

Dean smiles at him, a private, somewhat sad smile.

He understands.

Moose’s visit a quarter of an hour later is a surprise. Cas thanked him right in front of everybody, of course, Sam’s just not quite there yet – for an honest apology, that is; he’s pretty sure they both remember the one he forced himself to after they killed of Lucifer’s hellhound.

“Dean would be dead without you”.

“I am pretty sure every single one of you would be dead without me several times over.”

“Yes, we would. But still. You saved my brother today. Thank you, Crowley.”

Wonders will never cease.

It happens later that night.

Crowley is no longer used to being summoned. The boys were the only ones left who did it in the first place, and the last one who had to was Moose in his desperate attempt to find Squirrel and his boyfriend.

He doesn’t even recognize the sensation for a second.

It’s the middle of the night anyway, who would –

Ah. He should have known. He’s in a devil’s trap, of course, but that’s hardly reason to worry.

Neither is Mummy Winchester glaring at him. Quite frankly, he’s been more scared of her sons at certain points than he ever was of her.

Killers are always scarier when they have a reasonable motive for what they are doing instead of being a ruthless fanatic.

He hasn’t seen the other woman who’s staring at him with the same kind of disgust on her face. It must be Dr. Hess, the woman who made Mick Davies do many things, and several of them downright disgusting, he’s ready to bet.

He knows what a haunted man’s eyes look like.  

He’s reasonable sure the two guys who are standing behind them are those he slammed into the wall when he saved the boys.

“Mr. Crowley” the woman greets him. “I have heard that you are the one to speak to if one’s interested in making a deal.”

[mycasandstarrs]

SPN 5x21: “Two Minutes to Midnight”

The common cold, dengue fever, and Japanese encephalitis. What a horrible trio of diseases.

And it’s gotten worse with the chicken pox.

“Are you gonna cure me?” Celeste’s last words.

RIP Celeste. Killed by...diseases caused by Pestilence.

Welp, Dean knows about Sam’s plan. He’s reacting about as well as you’d expect.

Cas!

Married couple banter! (Which from here on out will now be acronym-ed to MCB.)

“Where the hell are you, man?”

“A hospital.”

“Are you okay?”

“No.”

“...you want to elaborate?”

Cas’ “batteries are drained”...so he’s “incredibly human”.

“All right. Well, look, no worries. Uh, Bobby's here. He'll wire you the cash.”

“I will?”   

lmao Bobby.

“You said ‘no’ to Michael. I owe you an apology.”

“Cas...it’s okay.”

“You are not the burnt and broken shell of a man that I believed you to be.”

“Thank you. I appreciate that.”

“You’re welcome.”

LMAAOO CAS. We love a deadpan icon.

“Eunice Kennedy” lmao

You coulda just knocked him out from the start.

Aww, sleeping Dean.

Pestilence has been found.

Back at the beginning.

“The Winchesters are here. We should go.” This demon had the right idea tho.

“The only reasonable thing to do here is to...take it out of their healthy young asses.” Uh, I wouldn’t call them “healthy”. Maybe Sam, but their livers/kidneys must hate them.

I forgot how “shout-y” Pestilence was.

PLEASE NO MORE VOMIT, I CAN’T TAKE IT.

RIP those 2 people. Killed by Pestilence.

Hoo boy, Sam and Dean are feeling it now.

"The doctor will see you now.”

Oh jeez. Scarlet Fever, meningitis AND syphilis.

Poor Dean; he’s got broken fingers to add to the list.

Pestilence really likes to monologue.

CAS!

“How’d you get here?”

“I took a bus.”

LMAO. We love a public transport icon.

Well damn.

“An occupied vessel, but powerless. Oh, that's fascinating. There's not a speck of angel in you, is there?”

(x)

“Maybe just a speck.”

MOTHERFUCKING CASTIEL, BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!

Ring #3 has been acquired.

“Please tell us you have actual good news.”

“...Chicago's about to be wiped off the map.”

lmaooo, That timing is perfect.

LMAO. Classic Cas/Destiel moment.

Hello, Crowley.

Our first “Hello, boys”?

Even Cas is upset about Bobby making a deal.

Bobby just confessed that he sold his damn soul, and Sam’s asking if he kissed Crowley. Priorities, Sam!!

Why did Bobby have to lie tho.

AND WHY DID CROWLEY TAKE A PICTURE, LMAO

“It’s insurance.”

“What are you talking about ?”

“You kill demons. Gigantor over there has a temper issue about it. But you won't kill me... As long as I have that soul in the deposit box.”

That’s a fair point.

Is that the grenade launcher I see in the arsenal?

“Let me guess. We're about to have a talk.” It’s rather obvious, isn’t it?

“Look, Dean, um...For the record...I agree with you. About me. You think I'm too weak to take on Lucifer. Well, so do I. Believe me, I know exactly how screwed up I am. You, Bobby, Cas...I'm the least of any of you.” NOOO SAM, DON’T SAY THAT.

“And...scene.” Way to ruin the moment, Crowley.

Ah, they figured it out.

So Sam is considering saying yes to Lucifer, Cas is practically human, and the Croatoan virus is about to hit. Dean must be silently panicking.

“O’ Death” by Jen Titus.

That’s a beautiful car, damn.

Death has one of the best character introductions, second only to Cas, imo.

“Watch where you’re walking, pal.” That dude’s last words.

RIP rude dude. Killed by Death.

“Well, it's the 11th hour, and I am useless.” Cas throwing his own pity party.

Bobby’s fathering Cas too. Bobby is a better father than Chuck, confirmed.

“Good luck stopping the whole zombie apocalypse.”

“Yeah. Good luck killing Death.”

Divide and conquer. Good strategy.

The “rumor” that Death’s scythe can kill Death is very much true.

That was a very nice thing Crowley did for Bobby.

Aww Bobby, he’s genuinely grateful.

Cas is learning about Sam’s plan.

“Of course. I am happy to say that if that's what you want to hear. But it's not what I think.”

“Really?”

“You and Dean have a habit of exceeding my expectations. He resisted Michael. Maybe you could resist Lucifer but there are things that you would need to know.”

:’)

Cas is the only one to not immediately shoot down Sam’s plan. Hell, he’s the only one to immediately tell Sam that he might actually be capable of doing it. In typical Cas fashion, he does properly warn Sam of several important things.

Adam is now Michael’s vessel.

Cas casually brings up the demon blood thing, fff hahaha.

Plan A is already out the window.

Cas uses the shotgun like a baseball bat.

Shit, the Croatoan virus has already begun.

RIP zombies. Killed by Sam and Bobby.

Sam goes off to rescue the remaining people.

RIP demon. Killed by Bobby.

Meanwhile, Crowley and Dean are in Chicago.

“Boy, is my face red. Death's not in there.”

“You want to cut the cute and get to the part where you tell me where he is?”

“Sorry. I don’t know.”

SERIOUSLY, CROWLEY.

RIP zombies. Killed by Sam

That look of awe Bobby gives Sam.

lmao Crowley.

He really likes to mess with Dean.

(Wasn’t there a blooper where a leaf perfectly landed on Jensen’s face here?)

RIP zombie. Killed by Cas.

(I would love to see more of Cas using guns on the show.)

RIP all those people, killed by Death.

Those two dead people kinda looked like Sam and Dean. I hate that.

“Thanks for returning that. Join me Dean. The pizza’s delicious.”

I know everybody loves Death, but I’ve always had mixed feelings about him. What I do know for certain is that I respect him.

“So is this the part where...where you kill me?”

“You have an inflated sense of your importance. To a thing like me, a thing like you, well...Think how you'd feel if a bacterium sat at your table and started to get snarky. This is one little planet in one tiny solar system in a galaxy that's barely out of its diapers. I'm old, Dean. Very old. So I invite you to contemplate how insignificant I find you.”

A simple “no” would’ve sufficed.

Is that really how you would eat Chicago pizza?

Death’s talking about reaping God when I know damn well he’ll die first.

“Uh...w-what do you want?”

“The leash around my neck --off. Lucifer has me bound to him. Some unseemly little spell. He has me where he wants, when he wants. That's why I couldn't go to you. I had to wait for you to catch up. He made me his weapon. Hurricanes, floods, raising the dead. I'm more powerful than you can process, and I'm enslaved to a bratty child with a temper tantrum.”

Yeah, and there’s where I like him again.

“And you think...I can unbind you?”

“There's your ridiculous bravado again. Of course you can't.”

Again, you coulda just said “no”.

Pizza saved Chicago.

“You're going to let your brother jump right into that fiery pit.” Oh boy. The ultimate sacrifice.

“You know you can’t cheat death.” Um...technically speaking, he has many times.

Ring #4 out of 4. It is complete.

The rings connecting together is pretty cool.

“Well, how'd it go at the Rockettes audition?”

“Well, high kicks -- fair. Boobs need work.”  

I love Bobby so much.

Dean, pls. Trying to have his cake and eat it too.

Bobby explaining his awed face from earlier in the episode: “I watched that kid pull one civilian out after another. Must have saved 10 people. Never stopped. Never slowed down.”

“Look, Sam's got a...darkness in him. I'm not saying he don't. But he's got a hell of a lot of good in him, too.”

:’) Bobby’s a proud father.

Good question, Bobby.