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pikachunas · 5 years ago

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Chrono Clobbered

“Are you gonna finish your french toast sticks?”

Jay looked up from his tray. The Burger King was crowded for a Monday morning and he was eager to get home and sleep for the rest of his day off. “You can have em’” Jay muttered. “I’m not hungry.” Ennis sighed and reach across the booth to grab a french toast stick off of Jay’s tray. “It’s always hard at first, but this is a good time to focus on doing things you enjoy and pursuing stuff you’re passionate about.” Jay stared blankly into his lap. “Some people say getting back to work sooner than later can help occupy your mind.” Finally, Jay looked up “No” he insisted. “There are too many memories there… good and bad.” Ennis paused for a second. “I hate to see you like this, but I know that you’ll feel better with time.” Jay scoffed “The only time I’ll feel better is in the past. There’s nothing left for me to look forward to.”

“I could tell you how to go back in time but you wouldn’t believe me.” Ennis teased. Jay raised an eyebrow and turned his palms upwards, shrugging. “You just have to take a punch.” Jay sighed “I would take a punch from present day Mike Tyson and then another one from 1991 Mike Tyson if it meant I could go back then and start over.” Ennis chuckled “then you’ll be relieved to learn that it’s not a Hall of Fame boxer you have to get slugged by.”

“Alright, then who is it?”. Jay was genuinely curious. “Do you know Mike Moak?” Ennis asked. Jay nodded “I know of him, I’ve seen After the Fall a bunch of times but I’ve never spoken to him for longer than a couple of minutes.” Ennis put a hand on Jay’s shoulder “Then you know what you’re getting into.” Jay shook his head “I don’t understand. What does Mike Moak have to do with going back in time?” He was already upset but now he was confused and growing increasingly irritated. He had seen Mike Moak in person enough to know that he was much too small and out of shape to throw a punch that could knock someone to the ground, let alone break the time space continuum.

“I know a guy who got in a fight with him in high school and he says he travelled back in time after MIke clocked him.” Jay was in no mood for jokes and he didn’t want to entertain this nonsense, but his curiosity was piqued. “That doesn’t make any sense.” He pondered out loud “Did he not wake up after Mike hit him?” Ennis looked away and rubbed his chin pausing for a moment “of course he did, but he was different ever since. Something changed in him and he wasn’t shy about telling people he had gone back in time. He made a believer out of me.”

“You believe him?” Jay asked. “Hell yes I do” Ennis replied emphatically. “He won $3,000 when he bet that the Giants would beat the undefeated 2007 Patriots in Super Bowl XLII.” Jay curled his lip “You’re telling me this guy knew for a fact the Giants were going to win as heavy underdogs and he still only won $3,000?” Ennis smirked and nodded “That’s what I’m telling you. That was not an easy call back then. They were 12 point underdogs.” Jay lifted himself out of his chair, almost jumping “If he travelled back in time from the future and knew for a certainty the Giants were gonna win that game, how come he didn’t bet everything he owned on it?” Ennis shrugged “I’m sure he did but he didn’t have that much to bet. It’s not like he knew he was gonna travel back in time, and I would venture to guess that if you get punched hard enough that it sends you back in time then you’re not exactly Stephen Hawking when you wake up…. At least not intellectually.”

Jay watched Ennis and waited for a smirk or giggle or some kind of tell that he was bluffing. Any indication that this was an act. “I believe him” Ennis doubled down “he’s just got that vibe like there’s something peculiar about him… like he really is from another time or dimension or something. You’ll understand when you meet him.” Jay thought for a second before pontificating “it’s just so absurd, I know it can’t be true, but I want to suspend disbelief and go into it with an open mind… just for the sake of his act.” Ennis slapped Jay on his back between his shoulders “If it’s an act then he deserves an Oscar for his commitment to the craft, because he’s living it.” Jay faked a smile “Snake oil salesman always do when they’re being watched.” he alleged. Ennis laughed and patted Jay’s back a few more times “That’s the thing about this guy, my friend… he’s got nothing to sell but a story and he’s giving it away to anyone who will listen.”

Later that evening, still unconvinced, Jay invited his friend Teddy to get lunch the following afternoon. Teddy had always been more involved in the local music scene than he ever was, and she would surely be much more familiar with Mike Moak. They agreed to meet at the Iron Gate Cafe on Washington Ave in Albany. Jay arrived first and was seated at a table by the kitchen. When Teddy walked in, he waved to signal her and she walked over to greet him at the table. Before she finished hanging her purse on the back of her chair Jay asked “How will do you know Mike Moak? Do you still see him at shows?” Teddy froze and looked at Jay before taking her phone out of her purse and sitting down. “A little, not super well” she replied “I see him about once a month at a bar or a show I’d say.” “How big is he now, do you like him?” Jay inquired. “Not very” Teddy responded at once. “I mean, he’s chubby and moody and obnoxious, so I don’t talk to him if I don’t have to. He always kind of reminded me of the Mayor of Halloweentown from the Nightmare Before Christmas. Both in shape and attitude. Why the sudden interest in him?” she finally inquired.

“I might have to start a fight with him” Jay responded blankly. “Oh… ok” Teddy countered inquisitively uncertain of whether or not she wanted to know more. “Well, you’d probably win” she paused “he must cut his coke with powdered sugar because nobody that parties as much as him should be that overweight. He’s got the same body type and hairline as the Penguin from Batman Returns.” She took a sip of the coffee she ordered and moaned “I hate to do it but I have to ask. Why do you feel like you need to start a fight with Mike Moak?”

Jay crossed his hands on the table. “I met someone who says that Mike punched him in high school and it sent him back in time.” Teddy laughed out loud, cackling at the thought “That’s great, but I don’t understand the joke” she chuckled “why do you want to go back in time anyway?” Jay looked away “There’s just something… someone I need to start over with.” The room fell silent “Is it someone that passed away?” Teddy asked somberly. “No…nothing like that” Jay answered “It’s just something I can’t let go, and I’d rather risk the rest of my life than keep going on without them.” Teddy was silent for a second then pried “that’s sad, and strangely romantic, but can’t you just talk to them?” Jay shook his head “Too many things have happened that can’t be taken back… I may have said or done something wrong at some point, or I wasn’t honest enough with myself, or I came on too strong… I don’t know, but I know I could make it right.” Jay thought out loud.

“Have you thought about talking to someone?” Teddy asked thoughtfully “Sometimes it can be really helpful to get an unbiased objective opinion.” Jay exhaled a frustrated sigh “There’s nobody else I want to talk to, just forget I said anything.” Teddy nodded “I’m not trying to second guess you, and you know I’ll support whatever you think you need to do, but you’re scaring me a little bit” She paused for a moment, shaking her head struggling to decide whether or not she should even continue to entertain this conversation. “I’ve never seen him swing on anyone but I don’t think he could throw a hard enough bare knuckle punch to knock you off your feet, let alone back in time.” She could tell Jay was anxious by the way he was toying with the straws and sugar packets. “I know that you know how silly this sounds and I hope that you know if you’re going through anything you can talk to me about it.” Jay looked into the distance before meeting Teddy’s eyes “Thank you” he murmured. He then shoved his money, the sugar packets and his still full cup of coffee to the center of the table in one thrust. “But I don’t want to talk about it, I want a chance to start over.”

Jay opened the door to Ennis’ 1984 Corolla and sat next to him in the passenger seat. “I have to remind you” Ennis warned “this guy is pretty wild. This is gonna be a fascinating experience for you. “I’m ready” Jay assured him. “I’m going in with an open mind and I’m willing to try anything.” The ride only lasted about 15 minutes from Jay’s Albany apartment before they parked in front of a modest single family home in the suburbs. “One last thing…” Ennis alerted “he goes by “The Chrone” Jay couldn’t help but break “Ha what?” he laughed “Why?” Ennis opened the door “Short for Chrononaut…. A Time Traveller” he responded stepping out of the car. He was afraid if he thought about it too long he would be overcome by how preposterous this was and he would succumb to logic and reason. He stepped out of the car and followed Ennis to the front door. Ennis rang the bell and after a moment, a near-elderly woman in a light sweater with ducks on it appeared in the doorway. “You must be some of Gordie’s friends” she said smiling. “Come on in, I’ll show you to his room.”

Jay entered the Chrone’s room and was overcome with nostalgic sentiment. He became fully engrossed in the atmosphere and found himself unable to look away from the E.T., Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Surf Ninjas, Terminator 2: Judgement Day, Super Mario World, the Legend of Zelda, Mortal Kombat, X-Files and Resident Evil posters that covered the walls. The Chrone was laying spread eagle in a beanbag chair in the center of the room playing NHL 95 on Super Nintendo and listening to “...And Justice For All” by Metallica. He was wearing a Smashing Pumpkins Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness T-shirt and a Misfits Crimson Ghost hat. Strewn out on the coffee table in front of the Chrone were stacks of Pokemon cards and Nintendo Power magazines. Jay sat beside Ennis on a futon that was against the wall adjacent to where the Chrone was seated.

“Welcome dudes” the Chrone said without looking away from the television. “Hey man! Thanks for letting me stop by” Jay replied enthusiastically. “Ness said you were interested in becoming a chrononaut.” Jay had picked up and was studying a Tamagotchi that was in the attached cup holder of the futon. “That’s why I’m here… it sounds too good to be true but I’m willing to try anything.” The Chrone stood up and walked over to the stereo that was resting in the center of a bookshelf that was spilling comic books from every shelf. He turned a knob to lower the volume and then looked at Jay, “I can only speak to my own experience, but I have no reason to believe the results couldn’t be replicated if the methods are the same.” Jay put the Tamagotchi down and looked at the Chrone to try and read any potential signs that this was a goof. The Chrone met Jay’s gaze “I wasn’t asking for it, and I didn’t want it… I was just a high school senior in 2007 trying to get laid and next thing I know it’s 1996 and I’m 12 years old again.” Jay stared at the Chrone for a minute and thought to himself before quizzing “If you went all the way back to 1996 why didn’t you invest in Microsoft or invent Google or something?”

The Chrone had told this story and had therefore answered this exact question dozens of times “I tried that kind of thing for a while. I told my parents that Apple was a surefire investment but to them I was just a kid with a sudden and fleeting interest in business and they shrugged it off. I would have loved to invent the iPod or developed Amazon.com but I didn’t have the money or resources to capitalize on what little knowledge I had retained from the future and by the time I was old enough to earn my own money the only thing I could remember was that the Patriots lost the Superbowl after their undefeated 2007 season. I told everyone I knew and I saved as much as I could but I was only able to save a couple grand. By then I had been living in an apartment with two roommates and delivering pizzas. I still had to live my life and I wasn’t positive that going back hadn’t altered the current reality I was living in. I was confident, but if I did nothing but save money and then I lost it all in a bet it would take me years to recover. You don’t realize how much of your life becomes forgettable when it’s just the same routine day to day. There were moments and events that I thought I remembered but most of the time it was no different than experiencing Deja Vu.”

Jay sat still and looked up at the Chrone. He hesitated for a moment then asked “I get this guy to hit me, then what?” The Chrone picked up a Dragonball Z Goku action figure that was on the bookshelf “if you do what I tell you then the same thing that happened to me will happen to you.” Jay was encouraged by the confidence with which the Chrone delivered this promise. He knew the story was laughably outrageous, but as far as he was concerned, he had run out of options and this was the desperate measure brought on by the desperate times in which he was living. .

“What if he kills me?” Ennis whispered, staring at the ground.

“Are you afraid to die?” the Chrone asked.

“I’m a little afraid of what comes next”

“If you believe what I’m telling you you’ll get a chance to live again however you choose”

“If you’re wrong, I’ll be humiliated or dead”

“Would you give what’s left of your life to relive the best times?”

“That’s why I’m here”

“Then do as I say”

Jay flipped his notepad open and tried to focus in spite of the millions of thoughts he had racing in his head. He exhaled “Mike seems like such a sensitive guy, how do I make him mad enough to hit me?” The Chrone sat back down in his bean bag chair and leaned back “There is only one way” he paused “You have to date his ex girlfriend.” Ennis froze, staring straight ahead. This wasn’t a qualifying objective that he was expecting to hear. He hadn’t had a girlfriend since high school and struggled to remember the last time he had even been on a date. After a moment, he flipped his notebook closed and asked, his voice breaking “I’m not very good with women, what if she doesn’t like me?”

“She’s never met a man she doesn’t like” the Chrone assured him “Swooning her will be the easy part.”

“What’s the hard part?” he asked nervously.

The Chrone smiled “Faking it for long enough to draw his attention.”

Again, Jay found the Chrone’s confidence to be encouraging “That’s ridiculous, how bad can she be?” he wondered out loud.

“She’s cursed with the face and the odor of a sewer dwelling rodent. Are you attracted to Dave Grohl?”

“Jesus… no. I mean, I like the Foo Fighters but I never got into Nirvana”

“Then this is going to be very difficult for you.”

Jay rubbed his forehead with the palm of his hand “Why does he like her so much then? He’s a talented, decent looking guy.”

“He wanted a woman which no man would desire. He understands that his jealousy is a weakness that he’s unable to control.”

Jay paced back and forth in a daze of bewilderment “None of this makes any sense, can’t I just hit him first or break one of his guitars or something?”

“Nothing else will inspire the rage necessary to elicit the desired response. If you want to go back, this is the only way.”

Jay sat down and cupped his nose and his mouth with his hands. He sat still for a moment and then released another heavy sigh “How do I find her?”

The following Friday night Jay drove to the bar that the Chrone had told him about. The Chrone had assured him that Michelle hung out there every Friday night since she and Mike had broken up in an effort to meet guys in other bands. Jay wasn’t sure who was playing, but he was hopeful that he would find Michelle inside. Before he walked in he stopped to consider how long it had been since he had approached a woman he didn’t know with the intention of asking her out. Had he ever?

Reluctantly, he walked into the building. The room he entered was narrow with an elevated stage at the end opposite the entrance. There couldn’t have been fifteen people in the bar but there was a band playing that had two keyboards next to each other on stage. He walked to the bar and scanned the room. It didn’t take him long to notice a short girl with thick dark hair in a messy bun and eyeglasses that looked like they were bought at a Golden Girls celebrity auction. She was doing a dance that looked like she was running in place while goose-stepping. She was kicking her feet out in front of herself one after the other while swaying her folding arms back and forth as if she was jogging. He had seen it before at ska shows, but there was no brass in the band on stage, in fact, she was dancing visibly faster than the rhythm of the mellow shoegaze song that was playing.

Jay stood at the bar watching this girl dance and the realization seriously struck him that if he was going to have an opportunity to begin again he would have to spend enough time with her to elicit an emotional reaction from Mike. “Maybe things aren’t so bad” he bargained “maybe I’ve been so focused on starting over that I haven’t spent enough time thinking about how to improve things for myself going forward.” He couldn’t imagine approaching this women, or speaking to her. At this point, he would be surprised if she were capable of holding a conversation. “This girl has gotta have an extra chromosome” he thought to himself. Nevertheless, he was determined to make an impression.

He stepped in front of her and tried to match her rhythm by swaying back and forth and shuffling his feet. For the first time, he looked into her almond eyes and not ten seconds passed before she lunged forward and planted an aggressive kiss on his mouth. Their teeth collided and there was an audible clank that compelled Jay to attempt to pull away. She mirrored the movement of his head and forced her tongue into his mouth. “This isn’t so bad” he tried to convince himself as she grinded their teeth together. After 30 seconds of her gnawing and breathing into his open mouth he slowly began to tilt his face back while gently pushing her away at the waist. He stepped backwards and as they parted she took her glasses off and bit her bottom lip. “Umm” he stuttered “Do you want a drink?” She rested the tip of her glasses frames on her cheek “Vodka soda” she demanded.

Jay trudged to the bar in a stupor. He was relieved that the first, and ultimately most important, goal in his quest was accomplished so effortlessly, but the reality of what was to come was daunting. “I already wish I never met this girl, and I don’t think she even told me her name yet.” he pondered. “You alright?” the squirrely bartender with glasses and a considerable nose asked. “I don’t know, man” Jay responded without thinking “Do you ever feel like you’re already in over your head before you even get started with something?” The bartender twisted his mouth and nodded “hmmm” he mumbled “like when you start a new video game and you have no idea how to control your character or which direction to go and you’re not sure if it’s even gonna be worth playing because there are so many other games that you already know are good?” Jay stared blankly at the bartender for a moment before responding “.... I guess?” he muttered “It’s a little like that” The bartender smirked and nodded “Then yeah, I feel that way all the time. I find it’s best to give it a chance. If by the time you know what you’re doing it still doesn’t seem worth the time and energy, try something new or revert back to the classics…. Anyway, what can I get for you?”

Jay considered what the bartender said and tried to decipher some meaning from his stoner philosophical musing. “I’d rather just give up now then spend any more time with this girl and then realize it’s not worth it, though” he conceded. “No” he asserted to himself “I’m not going to allow myself to be so easily dissuaded, and I’m not gonna quit just because this girl is insufferable. I’m gonna make her fall in love with me and I’m gonna flaunt it all over town so that Mike gets so incensed he slugs me back to the Mesozoic era.” He looked up at the bartender “One Vodka Soda” he commanded.

When the bartender returned with the drink, Jay collected it and then walked back to the center of the room where Michelle was dancing. “Here ya go” he said, handing her the glass. She took a small sip to taste it and then drank the rest of the glass in one gulp. Before he could say anything she smiled and handed him the glass “Vodka soda” she repeated. “Um… OK” he mumbled before turning around and making his way back to the bar. Before he could say a word the lanky bartender had two vodka sodas waiting side by side at the edge of the bar. “This should buy you a couple more minutes” he said with a grin. “What am I getting into?” he asked the bartender, exasperated. “Well..” he said smiling “That all depends on what you’re looking for.” Jay stopped to think of the best way to explain without giving away too many details. “She seems cool” he lied “I guess I’m just looking to get to know her.” The bartender was a aghast “Why?” he asked immediately, failing to mask the look of concern and confusion on his face. Jay was puzzled and disheartened by the bartenders reaction “I don’t know” he replied “she seems fun.” The bartender threw a towel over his shoulder “I guess it depends on how desperate you are… let me know if you need anything else.”

Jay returned to MIchelle with both drinks. He handed the first one to her and again she swallowed it in one gulp. Before he could move she reached for his hand “Is this one for me too?” she asked while ripping the glass from his hand and inhaling the second vodka soda. Jay looked had her wide-eyed for a moment before she spoke again “What’s a girl gotta do to get you to buy her another drink around here?” she asked. Jay was amazed and befuddled “Dude are you serious?” he asked without thinking “Can I at least get you something you can pace yourself with?” MIchelle shrugged and pursed her lips like she was thinking “You can buy me a snack” she answered before pausing “but first…. Vodka soda.”

Jay waited for the band to finish their set before retreating to the bar to add a fourth vodka soda to his tab. When he turned to walk back towards the stage he noticed that MIchelle was kissing one of the guitar players in the band. “Jesus, what the fuck?” he cursed out loud. The squirrely bartender snickered “I could have told you that was gonna happen… she’s got a thing for dudes in bands.” Jay shook his head “I walked away for like two minutes, to get HER a drink” he was struggling to keep his voice down. “She’s moves quick” the bartender said “she’ll be bored with him before the next band is off the stage.” Jay ignored him and walked backed toward MIchelle, who had finished kissing the guitar player and was now chewing the straw from one of her drinks while he finished packing his gear. He handed her the drink “Do you know that guy?” he asked reluctantly. “Which guy?” she replied. “The guy you were just kissing?” he asked as monotone as he could. She looked at the guitar player and then back at Jay “I thought that was you” she said assuredly. Without thinking Jay snapped back “He’s like Asian or something and he’s six inches taller than me, are you feeling alright?” he inquired feigning concern.

“I’d feel better if I had a snack” Jay covered his eyes with his left hand. He had spent less than an hour and $40 on drinks with Michelle and he was ready to ride his fixed gear bike into the Hudson River. “What do you want?” he asked patiently. “I don’t know” she replied “but I’m well hung.” Jay had already spent enough time with Michelle to know that correcting her on the application of that phrase was a fool’s errand so instead he took her by the hand and led her outside to his car. “Where are we going?” she wondered aloud. “I’m assuming I have to decide for you” he said before starting his car. “Do you want to just go to Bombers and then I’ll drop you off back here?” Michelle shrugged in agreement.

“Would you like to sit upstairs or downstairs?” Jay asked after he parked in front of the restaurant. Michelle pursed her lip “The bar is upstairs” she asserted. “Alright” Jay replied holding the door open for her. While Jay was waiting for a host to seat them he turned and noticed that Michelle was no longer by his side. He scanned the room for a moment before noticing her in front of the bar with her arms around a chubby guy with a skull cap and a beard. She was thrusting her waist into the back of his legs and they were both laughing. “How many?” a waitress in a black tank top and cut off jean shorts asked. Jay looked up from the ground “Just two” he replied turning to look back at Michelle who was now taking a shot in unison with the bearded guy, their arms intertwined. “Follow me” she said and Jay followed her to a booth in the corner of the room. He sat alone for a minute confused at the behavior he was witnessing first hand, but moreso why anyone would want to date this person, and uncertain about what it is about her that someone would be willing to fight for.

While he was lost in consideration, Michelle appeared across from him “Did you order me a drink yet?” she demanded. “No, I wasn’t sure what you’d want.” Michelle tucked her head into her chest and tightened her lips, almost resembling a turtle retreating into its shell. She lifted her necklace out from under her “Propaghandi” t-shirt. Hanging from the thin rope in chipped fool’s gold letters were the words “Vodka Soda” in script lettering. “I should have guessed” he chuckled trying to hide his smile. Just then the waitress reappeared “Are you guys ready to…” “NACHOS” Michelle interrupted, hollarring. The waitress laughed nervously “and for you?” she asked, turning her gaze toward Jay. “I’ll have a tofu burrito.. And can we get a Vodka soda and a PBR draft” he requested. “I’ll be right back with that” she promised walking away as quickly as possible.

When Jay turned again to look back at Michelle, she was leaning toward him with her elbows on the table. As she crept closer, he was overcome by the smell of a citrus fruit left to ferment in a fast food dumpster. “What are you doing?” he asked with a tremble in his voice. “Kiss me ya bum” she demanded before puckering her lips with her eyes closed. Jay ducked her attempt and rolled out of the booth. “I’m gonna grab some napkins, and wash my hands; do you need anything?” MIchelle looked in his direction without looking at him directly and shook her head. When Jay came back from the bathroom he found their food waiting on the table but Michelle was nowhere to be found. He checked the rest of the tables in the lobby and the bar but she wasn’t there. The women’s restroom door was ajar so he knew it was unoccupied.

He walked downstairs to find Michelle sitting in a booth with two college aged men. When he stepped into the dimly lit room he saw that she was sitting on one man’s lap and either whispering into or nibbling on his ear. He wasn’t sure why he was still surprised but her audacity was so foreign to him. He approached the table and ignoring the men looked at MIchelle “our food is upstairs, come up whenever you’re ready” before turning away and returning to their booth. He sat by himself for a few minutes, eager to enjoy his burrito but somehow still concerned about Michelle thinking it rude if he started eating without her. After 10 minutes she appeared in the doorway and took her seat across from him, her black lipstick was smeared all around her mouth who had just eaten a chocolate ice cream cone on a roller coaster. There were visible red marks on both sides of her neck “Maybe she’s having an allergic reaction to that dudes cologne” he considered but he knew the truth was that one,each, or both at the same time, of those guys were sucking on her neck. He didn’t mind, but suddenly the panic set in that he might have to sleep with her to keep her interest or for word to get back to Mike and besides the physical act of that likely being as fun and exciting as getting a tetanus shot at your grandmother’s funeral, he didn’t doubt for a second that she might be carrying… something. He had to distract himself from these excruciating thoughts so he quickly asked “Do you work or go to school?”.

“Both” she replied while balling some cheese from the top of her plate of nachos and popping it into her mouth. “Oh cool, what do you do for work?” he was sincerely curious. “I’m a teacher.” Jay wanted to laugh but he wasn’t rude by nature and he still wasn’t positive he had sealed the deal. “Do you teach a spin class or something?” He wondered out loud, trying to mask his sarcasm. “No, I teach English as a second language in an elementary school, I’m almost done with my masters.” He stared blankly at Michelle, hoping the shock he was feeling wasn’t displayed on his face. “Do you go to the University of Phoenix or Devry or something?” he had never been more puzzled. “UAlbany” she responded, stuffing a fistfull of nachos into her mouth. He was literally speechless that this person who had kissed half of Albany and had hardly uttered a coherent sentence in the last two hours provided such a valuable and formative service to children of the community. She didn’t seem to notice that they finished their meal and he payed the bill in silence.

“You ready?” he asked, turning to step out of the booth. “Mmhmm” she mumbled before rubbing the last bit of salsa out of her side cup and then sucking on her finger. He wondered if she was trying to be seductive but she looked like a largemouth bass with human teeth struggling to swallow a breakfast sausage. Jay put on the Casket Lottery for the drive back to the bar. “This sucks” she concluded more than once on the ten minute ride. When he parked in front of the bar on Central Ave, one of the busiest roads in the city, Michelle reached over and began loosening the belt that held his corduroy pants up. “I’m kind of full” he squeaked, attempting to slunk away from her advances. “I”m not” she declared confidently. “I really think we should wait” he could feel the sweat pooling on his face. “Mmm mmm” she hummed still toiling with his belt. “Thank God the technology of a belt buckle is so perplexing to her” he obliged. He heard the thwip of his belt come undone and he could feel his pants loosen.

Just then, in a state of panic he slammed his forearms onto the steering wheel and the horn blasted a long continuous note. It was the most satisfying abrasive E flat he thought he would ever hear and she jumped back at once. “Sorry…. I’m just a little nervous” he fibbed. “It’s ok ya freak, just relax” she returned, attempting to pacify him. “Yer gonna love it.” He found himself involuntarily balling his fists and tightening his arms against his upper body. “I need to get the fuck out of here” he knew, but he had never hit a woman… or anyone, and he wasn’t about to start tonight. He opened his mouth to speak but she stopped him at once “no no no no no” she mumbled gripping at the front of his pants. In a disoriented and frantic daze he absent-mindedly wrapped his upper and lower arms around her forehead and began wrenching her head back and forth. At first she tried to wiggle free “oh, you like it rough, let’s see if you can ride this bull then” she laughed. Jay ignored her and continued to placidly swing her head back and forth close to his hip in rhythm with the song that was playing. After about 30 seconds, her body became limp and she fell asleep in his lap.

He let go of a long satisfied sigh and rested his head against the back of his seat. He was profoundly relieved but too terrified of what might happen if he fell asleep so he opened the window hoping the cool air would refresh him. Suddenly, he heard a thunderous roar like a freight train colliding with a jet engine at a nuclear bomb test site. Bewildered he scanned the street only to realize that the sound was coming from his lap. Michelle had been passed out for no longer than a minute and she was already snoring like the Krakatoa volcano eruption. The rumble of her trumpeting appalled and paralyzed him. He shook his hips and she began to sway. Lifting her head she inquired “How long was I out for?” Jay was still in a fog of slackjawed confusion “Umm about two minutes” he replied. She smiled and sat up. He had had enough MIchelle for one night, and one lifetime, so he was eager to get home and die in his sleep. “You’ve been a lot of fun” he lied “I’ll text you tomorrow.” They exchanged numbers and she stumbled out of his car.

The next day Jay was playing destiny 2 and enjoying a Nine Pin Signature Cider from his couch when his phone lit up. He hadn't lived alone long and it had not been a welcome change but listening to records and gaming were a welcome distraction. He checked his messages to see Michelle had sent him a picture. He expected to be disgusted, but was pleasantly surprised to see it was just a screenshot of a different text conversation. The wall of text were from an “MM” and read “That Jay kid, really? I’ll fucking lay him the fuck out” “He’ll never be in a good band because he has no talent and nobody likes him.” “I really need to die. Expire. Disappear.” Jay was concerned at first and then his heart began pounding and he began laughing to himself when he realized his plan was working exponentially quicker than he had expected. Then he saw the most recent message and a chill shot up his spine. “I need to talk to you in person or I’m going to jump of the Patroon Island bridge.” His excitement was immediately curbed when he considered the possibility that he had spent a night with Michelle for no reason. “You should go talk to him” he texted her back “he seems really upset and there’s no reason to burn bridges…. No pun intended.” She responded a moment later “I guess. I need to get my Ipod anyway.”

Michelle arrived at Mike’s apartment and parked on the lawn. She had lived there for four years so in spite of the circumstances, she had no problem walking in unannounced and found Mike sobbing in the kitchen. “I can’t even fucking buy milk that doesn’t expire, I should soak some marb reds in a pint glass and force them down my throat.” she could hear him cursing himself from the living room. He smirked when he stepped out of the kitchen and saw Michelle lighting up his bowl on the couch. “I knew you’d come back to me when you realized you would never find someone with my creative fun qualities.” Unsolicited, he went on “Anybody who has experienced any success will just lie and deceive you… they’ll be like “I love THICC” and then fucking ghost you.” She took a long hit. “Nobody will ever appreciate you like I do or give you a life as exciting as I did. Everything you have and everybody you know that means anything is because of me.”

“Nobody will ever come close to my worth, and my talent, and my heart” Mike went on. “You fucked up. Enjoy your boring lonely bullshit life.” Mike picked the cat up off of the coffee table and held it up to his face. “Look what you’re doing to Henri” he said, rubbing the disinterested cat against his cheek. “We could have been a family… now you’ll never have anyone. Nobody is ever going to care about you as much as I did.” Michelle had become accustomed to tuning out Mike’s rambling and was crafting a paper boat out of a sheet of looseleaf paper that he had scribbled some lyrics on. The words “I’m still alone here waiting to feel the hype we once had both being psyched and in love” were visible on the starboard side of the vessel. Mike droned on “Just leave me alone unless you want to make me happy or make me cum” he proposed. “I’m stoney baloney” she announced, placing the boat on top of an empty vase that sat at the edge of the table.

Mike put the cat down on the couch, turned away, and pounded his fist against the door frame “I wouldn’t take you back if you begged, fuck you” he roared “you gave up GOLD… I’m Mike fucking Moak… I hate your fucking guts.” He covered his face with both hands “There’s no escaping you and this crippling sadness and pain” He turned around and noticed he was alone in the room. “Look at this caterpillar!” he heard Michelle celebrate from the front yard. “I’m gonna drive it to my house!” she announced picking the caterpillar up and stuffing it into the pocket of her jean jacket. She climbed into her Nissan Versa and backed out of the yard, waving as she turned to drive away. “Why doesn’t she understand that she’s in love with me?” Mike wondered while he watched her from the doorway. “It’s like she doesn’t realize I could replace her tomorrow if I wanted to… she’s making the biggest mistake of her hopeless life.” He walked back into the house and sat on the couch next to Henry.

By midnight Jay realized he hadn’t heard back from Michelle. He texted her “You alive? LOL?”. She replied less than a minute later “I forgot my Ipod but I got a caterpillar.” Before he could respond a second message came through “I crushed it in my pocket trying to find my juul though so I fed it to a toad.” Jay snickered and wrote back “Maybe if you kissed him he’d turn into a prince.” Michelle wrote back “I licked it but I didn’t feel anything and it didn’t eat the caterpillar.” and then “Do you want to come to Mike’s show tomorrow night? Everybody in his band is cool except for him.” Jay face lit up when he saw that. He couldn’t believe this plan would come to fruition so rapidly but he was glowing with delight. “You bet!” he responded. “I can’t wait!” He didn’t have to wait long for her reply “Great, I’ll pick you up at 7.”

The following night Mike was on stage when Jay and Michelle entered the bar. He was tuning his guitar and talking to the drummer of his band when Jay noticed the bass player make eye contact with Michelle. “Here we go” he thought “it’s all gonna pay off soon.” Just then the bass player walked over to Mike and said something to him. Mike spun around in a flash and ripped his guitar off his shoulder, tearing the loop of the strap.He stomped off the stage in a rage “What the fuck are you doing here?” He hollarred “Didn’t I tell you I’d fucking lay you the fuck out if I saw you?” Jay’s instincts were to run, but he had invested too much time and sacrificed too much of his pride to give up now. Suddenly he was overcome with a certainty that everything he had done in his life, and especially in the two days, had led him to this moment. “This is my manifest destiny” he thought to himself “I’ll never have to go to work, or wonder what went wrong, or kiss MIchelle again after tonight.” He planted his feet and braced himself for a confrontation. “You trying to steal my 80-85?” Mike squealed.

Jay tensed his upper body and with his newfound hardened will he held his ground “She’s my 80-85 now, motherfucker” wrapping his right arm around Michelle’s waist. Mike balled his fists and shuffled toward Jay. “I’m gonna knock you into last week” he threatened. “That’s not far enough you weeble-shaped invalid” Jay rebutted without thinking. Mike ignored the comment and stood nearly nose to nose with Jay. He exhaled, and Mike could smell onions and discount vodka on Jay’s breathe. This intense olfactory reminder of Michelle was enough to send him into a state of psychosis rage and in an instant he grit his teeth and pulled a punch with his right arm while grabbing Jay’s collar with his left. Jay’s instinct was to duck, but he knew that this moment was the culmination of everything he had endured. He flinched and turned his head slightly to the right wincing just as Mike’s closed fist connected with the left side of his face.

Jay woke to the rumbling thunder of a passing train. He opened his eyes and lifted his head off the pillow to scan his surroundings. There were cd’s stacked on a desk by a computer and records in old milk crates on the floor. He rolled off the bed and walked to the window. Across the street he could see the Menands Little League Baseball field. He smiled and nodded before he paused and let go of a long slow sigh of relief. From outside his room he could hear voice, although it was too faint to decipher what was being said or who was speaking. He stepped over a collection of “A Song of Ice and Fire” books and pushed aside a hockey stick that was resting against the bedroom door. The voice grew louder as he stepped out of the room and into the hall. He walked passed a bathroom and a set of stairs and pressed his ear against the door from where the voice was coming. A tear came to his eye when he was certain recognized who was speaking. He waited for a moment and then knocked softly. From inside the room he heard Pat say “Hold on mom... JG is at my door.”

Epilogue:

Mike sat on the couch in his empty apartment. He lifted his Gibson SG guitar off his lap and set it against the opposite armrest on the springs of the couch where a cushion was missing. He got up and walked down into the basement. He looked at the drum kit that was set up in the corner, a collection of guitar amplifiers, monitors, and speakers stood idle on both sides. “Nobody with my talent will ever use any of this stuff again.” he assured himself. “I might as well set this place on fire so nobody can taint the legacy I’m leaving behind here”. “No” he stopped himself “This place will be a historic site someday… a tribute to the monolithic phenomenon that I was and the heart and talent and greatness I left in my wake” He walked back up the stairs and closed the door behind him.

He walked to Everett road and then down the exit ramp to Interstate 90 East. He stayed on the right shoulder, pausing every couple of minutes to catch his breath. “I should really work on my cardio” he admitted “not that it matters now.” When he got to the bridge that overlooked NY route 787 and ran parallel to the Hudson River he felt nervous for the first time. “Am I really gonna do this to all my fans” he wondered. “They’ll never find another recording artist that produces as much flawless content that’s as meaningful to them.” He looked over the three lane highway that was hundreds of feet below him. “This world doesn’t deserve me” he repeated to himself. “I’m too talented… and creative….and passionate. What a waste.” He stepped over the guardrail, reaching behind his elliptical body to grip it with both hands. “So many fucking posers in this town. Nobody would even be able to find Albany on a map if I didn’t live here.” He let go of the rail with one hand. “Doesn’t matter now… this whole fucking city might as well collapse into the Hudson River.” He leaned forward. “Later Dickheads” he said out loud. He let go.

Michelle parked in front of her building and shut the engine down. She collected her jacket and purse from the passenger seat before stepping out of the car and making her way toward the entrance. She opened her purse to remove her keys and when she looked up she saw a small crate to the right of the front door. As she stepped closer, she saw that a cat was sitting on a couch cushion inside the crate. It mewed as she approached. When she got close enough to recognize him, she saw that a note was taped to the front of the cage over the latch with her name on it.

She unfolded the note and read it to herself. “Henri has a vet appointment on Monday, please take care of him.” Taped to the bottom of the note was a card with the vet’s address and the appointment time and date. She put the card in her pocket and crumbled up the note before throwing it into the shrubs outside her building. She lifted the cage and carried Henri through the front door and into her apartment. She unhinged the latch and left the gate open so Henri could come out when he was ready. She paused as she poured a can of club soda into a half empty 200ml bottle of vodka. “Who am I gonna buy cocaine from now?” she wondered.

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friday-iam-in-love · 6 years ago

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So, something happened a couple weeks ago and I’ve been thinking a lot about it. So, if anyone wants to send their opinions to me after reading this, I’ll be more than glad to read them. If you don’t know, Brazil (my country) is the third biggest musical theatre producer in the world. Behind New York and London is my city, São Paulo, the biggest city in Latin America. So, we’ve been having a lot of nice musicals in the last years, like Wicked, Les Mis, Singin’ in the Rain, Sister Act, Rent etc. I’ve been a musical theatre lover since I watched the first Brazilian production of Beauty and the Beast in 2002, when I was six years old. I became very involved with the musical theatre scene in São Paulo in the last two years because of my blog, which I run with a friend of mine (this will end very soon). We make interviews, we go to press conferences, VIP premieres, and it’s all very fun. Unfortunately my friend and I are having couple of issues with each other because we have very different opinions on how the blog should work, but that’s another story. So, last month we went to see the VIP premiere of the Brazilian production of Natasha, Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812. If you don’t know what it is about, it’s a sung-through musical based on War and Peace. I’m very open-minded so I was very excited to see it just for the fact that I love watching musicals. Well, I didn’t know that it was a sung-through musical, so by the end of act 1 I was very tired. I’m not the biggest fan of sung-through musicals, but I don’t hate it. Les Mis is amazing and I really liked Jesus Christ Superstar, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, Hamilton… But I just found the story rather boring. My friend loves The Great Comet and he was very excited through the entire performance. We met other friends at the intermission and we started sharing our opinions. Everybody loved it and I said: “well, I think it’s kinda boring, actually”. And then it happened. One of our girl friends said: “You like Grease but you don’t like The Great Comet!”. I think she noticed I didn’t like what she said because she said that she was joking. But she wasn’t. And a friend of a friend asked: “What kind of musical do you like?” and I answered: “Well, my favorites are Wicked, Anastasia, Legally Blonde…” and he said: “So, you started liking musicals after Wicked?” (SO, THAT’S VERY IMPORTANT, WICKED OPENED IN BRAZIL IN 2016 AND A NEW AGE OF MUSICAL THEATRE FANS EMERGED WITH IT. SO THERE’S A PREJUDICE AMONG THE FANS IF YOU ARE A POST-WICKED FAN. SOME PEOPLE SAY YOU'RE NOT A REAL MUSICAL FAN IF YOU STARTED LIKING IT AFTER WICKED). And I said, “No, I watched my first musical when I was six, I study theatre since I was thirteen, I’ve been in more than 50 plays, acting, directing, choreographing…”. Well, and that’s what I’ve been thinking since that day. Am I considered a theatrephile (is this even a word?) only if I like serious classical musicals? I see a lot of people being ostracize because they say they love musicals but their favorite ones are the blockbusters. Yes, I like Grease! It is a great fun musical! It’s been around for 40+ years! And no, I don’t like the musical based on War and Peace! And what’s wrong with that? Well, nothing! There’s no problem at all in enjoying this kind of art. And not just in theatre, but movies, literature, music… Let’s say I watched every single Disney Channel Original Movie ever, from Halloweentown to Descendants 2. I can be considered a cinephile right? Right! Cinephile is someone who loves movies. That’s it. It doesn’t matter if it’s a rom-com, a blockbuster, a cult movie, a B horror movie… The same goes to literature. For example, someone who read the entire Potter saga, Twilight, Percy Jackson, City of Bones, Hunger Games, can be considered a bibliophile just like someone who read Jane Austen, Harper Lee, Mark Twain, Shakespeare. AND THE SAME GOES TO THEATRE. I’M A THEATREPHILE JUST FOR THE MERE FACT THAT I LOVE THE THEATRE. It doesn’t matter if it’s Death of a Salesman, Oedipus Rex or Mean Girls the Musical (which I love). It’s okay if you say you’re a fan of the movie but never read the book. Everything’s fine. There’s no award for reading the book first, for liking Funny Girl instead of Frozen, for reading Ulysses instead of The Fault in Our Stars. Let people enjoy things. Stop trying feeling better making the other look bad.

#thoughts #theatre #theatreedit #theateredit

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tallestsilver · 6 years ago

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Jack and Sally with #2 for the kiss meme?

The anticipation was killing her. Well, it would if she weren’t already comprised of dead bodies. With her ear pressed to the door, Sally waited to hear the tell-tale click of the lights turning off as Dr. Finkelstein went to sleep. True to form, the power shut down in the bulbous tower.

“Yes!” She exclaimed in a whisper, a smile spreading on her jagged mouth. She gathered up everything she needed in her wicker basket. She wrapped it all up in a hastily-sewn blanket to secure it all inside. She peered out the window, not wanting to throw herself out if she could help it.

She waited to hear any sounds reverberating from within the echo-prone house. It had been some time since the Doctor created a new partner for himself, and yet he still insisted on keeping Sally in her own room. Their father-daughter dynamic was in full effect and it was still irritating. True, she was not as confined as she once was, but even still, here she had remained.Not tonight. Sally pulled the thread from her ankles, removing her feet entirely. She placed them delicately on top of her basket, removing the socks and placing them back on her legs. She took a tentative step. Silence met her ears, where the clicking of her heels on unsteady feet would give her away. Carefully, she opened her door and crept down the stairs. Most of the houses in Halloweentown made noises. An ambiance unto themselves of an old house groaning and creaking. Dr. Finkelstein kept a sturdier building so as to prevent it from interfering with his experiments. Any sound that was not coming from the laboratory would be out of place. Silence was key for Sally’s escape. Removing her feet was a good plan for maintaining stealth, but it proved to be more cumbersome than Sally realized. She was precariously off balance, her stitching never parallel on both sides. She held onto the handrail and eased herself down, holding her breath each time she reached for the new step. One right after the other. Trying to balance the basket in the crook of her elbow and maintain her balance was proving too tricky and with a gasp caught in her throat, she suffered a harsher misstep. Her seams popped in her left wrist and she slid down the stairs, her backside bumping against every corner.

Somehow, she managed to land silently, her basket contents unspilt. She wanted to groan in pain, and her right hand rubbed her sore behind. From the near top of the stairs, her hand waved down at her. “Come back here,” she mouthed angrily to her appendage. It jumped in the air to give her a thumbs-up, and skittered down the banister, jumping into her lap and climbing up her dress. It dug, seemingly inappropriately, in the front of her dress, rummaging around to retrieve her needle and thread. It jumped out of her décolletage, needle between its fingers and thread palmed securely. It hopped in her basket, and Sally scooped it all up and continued on her silent yet treacherous path out of the door. Happily, she had greased the hinges earlier in the day, so no creaks exposed her deception. She slipped out into the night of Halloweentown.She managed a few steps outside on the uneven cobblestones, but once she rounded a corner out of sight, she sat to reattach herself. Her left, rogue hand slipped the needle and thread into her right and nestled itself against her wrist.“Thank you,” she whispered to her hand as the other one went to work sewing up its mate. Sighing, she removed her socks and stuffed a few leaves back into her leg that threatened to escape. A tiny black spider skittered out of her open hole, angry to be evicted from under a leaf. With careful strokes, she stitched herself securely back together, knotting the thread tightly. She propped her leg up on the opposing knee and rotated her ankle in a concentric circles to ensure the stability of her work. She pressed her foot down against the hard stones of the street, adding more pressure to it; there were no popped stitches. Good. She finished sewing back her other ankle, testing it the same way as the other. She hoisted herself up on her unsteady legs and proceeded down the street to her destination: Jack’s home.Jack’s manor was situated new the outskirts of town, very close to the pumpkin patch. A quiet, misty haze perpetually settled over the curling vines, only just beginning to bud. Sally inhaled the vapor and sighed contently. She loved looking at the golden hued blossoms. Such a pity they only bloomed for a day. Sally hummed to herself as she strolled by, slightly swinging her basket with a little more of a bounce in her step. Jack had invited her to spend the night - in his guest room of course! - so she was floating on Cloud 13. Her body thrummed with excitement and butterflies, so much so Sally was mildly concerned a moth may have wormed its way through her stitches and was fluttering wildly inside her.

As she walked up the steps to his front door, she reached out to pull on his doorbell, but her hand was stopped in mid-air. “What if he’s asleep now?” She worried to herself, biting her tilted lip. “I don’t want to disturb him… This was a bad idea…” She was still rooted to the stoop, wanting to go inside, dreading if she did.Her decision was expedited when Jack swung open his door, his face beaming with excitement.“Sally!” He exclaimed, perhaps a little too loudly. Her shock quickly switched to a nervous smile. “Good evening Jack,” her voice higher pitched than she intended.

His lanky frame took up the entire space of the doorway as he slumped to one side, his bony grin widening and his eye sockets soft as he gazed at Sally. He stood there for several moments until Sally cleared her throat nervously, her clammy skin tinged with a hot blush. Jack straightened himself back up. “Right this way, Sally!” His enthusiasm brought a wide smile to her face and helped her forget her anxieties. He held the door open for her and stepped to the side, offering his bony fingers to her. She took his hand and stepped inside, still uncertain how the night would proceed.

Jack led her up his rickety stairs as he spoke animatedly about his plans for Halloween this year. “-and after the pumpkins are ablaze, the bats will spring forth, shrieking and flying towards everyone!” Jack cackled in delight, grinning wildly at Sally. She smiled kindly at Jack, happy with his excitement. Jack noticed her parcel and offered his hand to her. “Allow me, Sally,” he said, although it was a slight question. Sally handed him the basket sheepishly. “That sounds absolutely horrible, Jack,” she told him as they reached the top of the stairs, “you have such big dreams.”“Isn’t it wonderful?” He said with a laugh, opening a door for Sally. It was a cozy room, just adjacent to his bedroom. The four poster bed was slightly off-kilter, with metal work in the shape of swirling spirals. A canopy of spider web hung over the bed from the ceiling, everything just so to make Sally comfortable.Sally gawked at the guest room, how quaint and cozy it all looked. Jack gently placed her basket on the bed and scooped her hands up in his own. “I do hope you like it.”“Jack! This is- I don’t-what I mean to say is-” Sally fumbled over her words breathlessly. Jack’s eye sockets gleamed with delight.“Excellent! Now go ahead and get some sleep, we have a big day ahead of us tomorrow!” His boisterous proclamation was bubbling over with giddiness. Sally tilted on her tippy toes and kissed Jack’s bony cheek.“Thank you, Jack. Goodnight,” Sally said softly. Jack gently touched his zygomatic arch in awe. He then grabbed Sally and dipped her low to the floor, his arms securely around her, before kissing her back on the lips. He set her upright again, her head spinning from being swept off her feet. She wobbled off balance, and Jack took her hands to steady her. He gave her a soft peck on the cheek and smoothed back her ruffled hair. “Goodnight Sally.” They separated reluctantly, Jack casting one more quick glance and a flash of a smile, as he closed the door to her bedroom to give her some privacy. Sally spun in delight and flopped herself on the bed like the ragdoll she was. She swooned and sighed happily, hugging the contents of her basket, her nightgown, to her chest. Tonight was a good night.

#Ask me #writing #Jack and Sally #OTP #The Nightmare Before Christmas #Jack Skellington #Goodnight Kiss #Sally #Sally Finkelstein #Tim Burton #fanfiction #my writing #prompt #kiss #kissing #Halloween #IT'S TIME TO GET SPOOKY #ALWAYS KISS YOU TWO #tnbc

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kayliemusing · 3 years ago

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1. Do you bite or lick ice cream? - Lick

2. What is home to you? - Cozy, safe, a place I always miss when I'm gone

3. What was the last lie you told? - My work asked me if I wanted to pick up a shift on a specific day and I said I had plans oops

4. Does everyone deserve the truth? - I think it depends on the situation. Generally, yes, but I think that sometimes we lie to people or don't tell an entire truth because we don't want to hurt someone or make something worse or hard on someone; we protect them. So I feel like if the truth is going to hurt them worse or not do any good, keep it to yourself. You don't have to lie outrageously, plus I think these kinds of lies aren't really "bad". They're coming from a place of love sometimes and quite literally wanting to shelter someone.

5. What is the creepiest toy ever made? - Furbies!!!!

6. Describe a moment in which you did something unacceptable in a bad situation. - I don't know if I'd call it "unacceptable" or a "bad situation" lol but one time my manager was really getting on my nerves and I rolled my eyes at her. We had a talk later, but yeah, that's really it. I'm not too crazy with the things I do lol. The most you get from me is a bit of an attitude (but only if I'm at my wits end!)

7. List two things that are more easily done than said. (No, I didn't mix them up.) - tbh I can't think of two but the first one that came to mind for me is showing someone you love them (taking care of them, spontaneously buying them something, giving them the last slice of pizza, listening to them chatter excitedly about something their passionate about, etc) because I think it's easier to subtly show little acts of love than to full on say "I love you/I'm in love with you" (especially if we fear rejection).

8. When was the last time you worked really hard to achieve something? - This week actually. I started a creating writing course and it's really motivated me to get my writing done so I completed an assignment as well as I have been vigorously stripping back my story idea and figuring out the main beats. It's the most productive writing-wise I've been in a while I think.

9. How many all nighters have you pulled? - Not too many. My all-nighters haven't been deliberate since a middle school sleepover, they generally happen now if I'm reading a book I can't put down lol

10. If humans didn't evolve to laugh or smile, how would we express our happiness instead? - Gestures, body language or words most likely.

11. How many romantic "things" or "flings" have you had? - Zero (wah wah wah wahhhh sad trombone)

12. What is your paradise? - I have a few!! I think there's a few lol. I'll give you one. My paradise would probably be a cozy december night, christmas only a few days away, I'm writing something I'm super into while sipping a cup of hot chocolate and I'm wearing a beautiful sweater and red lipstick. Anything cozy is my paradise really. (also in this dreamy-paradise I'm making (good) money off of my own writing so I don't have to work a minimum wage job anymore)

13. What is your favorite background noise? (Ex. Water dripping, people talking.) - I love the sound of rain hitting the car or going down a rain gutter. I also love the sound of birds chirping.

14. How many hearts do you think you have broken? - 1

15. What is the most important thing about electronics? What does this say about you? - I think it's good that we have something small and convenient like cellphones to get a hold of people or to call for help if we ever need it. Like I can't imagine being in the past when something serious was happening and they didn't have anyone to call for help.

16. Why do people care about celebrities? Do you care about celebrities? - I think people like the escape that celebrities bring, whether it's to live vicariously through them or to make fun of them lol. The only celebrity I really care about is Taylor Swift. I don't really know much else about any other celebrity.

17. What is the most annoying thing someone can do to you? - Embarrass me or make me feel stupid or undervalued.

18. Do you overexaggerate? What are the pros and cons of this? - I do sometimes, but not excessively. I do more so as a kid. Pro: it makes stories better. Con: you're kinda lying lol

19. Have you played any instruments before? Which instruments? - I tried to learn the guitar but it didn't work out lmao

20. Do you like taking selfies? Why or why not? - I used to. I'm not totally opposed to selfies, but I find that pictures of any kind make me feel worse about myself so I just quit doing it. If my makeup is really nice that day I'll take one and it'll be fine, but generally I just don't like to.

21. List 3 things you like about yourself? - My attention to detail - My deep seated kindness - I'm strong-willed so my beliefs and values never move

22. What is the best advice someone has ever given you? - Taylor Swift baby. "You are not the opinion of someone who doesn't know you or care about you" but I still have yet to let it sink in truly bc I still care oops. Also, writing advice: "Show, Don't Tell" this advice can literally save a writers life.

23. Do you have what it takes to raise a child? Why or why not? - I think I could raise a child, but I don't think I'm ready to. a) I don't have a person to raise a kid with me, b) I think I still have a lot of growing up to do and that's very important when it comes to having a kid.

24. How do you cheer yourself up after a bad day? - i cry, binge, feel sorry for myself, play some TS, and repeat.

25. When was the last time you felt awkward? - I feel awkward about everything. I felt super awkward at the grocery store yesterday bc there were these teenagers at the store in this huge pack and I had to try to get by them but they kept getting in my way and I felt so awks but also annoyed and angry bc I was trying to get stuff done.

26. Are you introverted or extroverted? Or a mixture of both? - Introverted

27. What constitutes a good friend? - Someone who is loyal, a good-listened, has your back, and defends you to the bone. Something that's always bothered me in friendships I've had is not feeling like my friend was on my side. For example, my sister's best friend always makes me laugh because when my sister is wronged by someone, her friend will immediately take her side and defend her to the ends of the earth. I've always hated if someone hurt me that my friend would remain friends with someone who hurt me or was mean to me. (I know as adults it can be a little different and I think it depends on the circumstance, but I just really value that loyalty of having a friend who would just go to the ends of the earth for you).

28. Would you rather have a lot of friends to hang out with or just one best friend? - One best friend.

29. In a regular day, what do you not want to hear? - my managers talking to me

30. What is your dream job? - Best-selling/successful author

31. Is it better to be lazy but smart or hardworking but unintelligent? -Hardworking but intelligent. Being hardworking I think says more to your character. Intelligence isn't the only interesting thing about you and it only takes you so far.

32. What is a truth about yourself that others find hard to believe? - I think probably that I struggle with my self worth because I preach a lot on self love and I'm definitely not a person to settle for less, but I really struggle to love myself or to feel worthy of love. Or that I'm not confident like people think, because I've always gotten that as a compliment, that I'm confident but I never ever feel confident and always feel like I'm less than.

33. What have you always wondered about the other gender? - why

34. Which fantasy world would you like to visit the most? - Not gonna lie, the Court of Thorns and Roses universe so I could see what Velaris looks like. Or Narnia!

35. Describe the worst friend you have ever befriended. - I had a friend in the fifth grade who was obsessed with beauty and being thin so she used to tell me I was fat all the time and when I would go to her house to "hang out" she would make me weigh myself and exercise. Probably the reason I have a low key eating disorder.

36. Imagine that you have switched bodies with someone you don't know. You can't switch back. What do you do? - I don't even know. I feel like I'd just be confused and then I'd probably have a panic attack.

37. If you found the recipe for immortality, would you sell it or would you burn it? - Burn it because someone bad is gonna get their hands on it I just know it

38. What is the most important, applicable class you have ever taken? - I haven't really taken many classes so far except for creative writing but I wouldn't call it "the most important" but it's definitely really bene benefiting me and my writing!

39. Name the last book you read. - I read Ugly Love by Colleen Hoover and it was a waste of ten dollars

40. Imagine that you are unable to express emotion. How would this affect your world? - I feel like it would call for a lot of hurt feelings, but there's other ways to express emotions through gestures and words. I'm a writer so I feel like that's how I would express it to people if I was unable to do it any other way. However if I was unable to express it through words, I'd be in big trouble bc that's kind of a writer's M.O.

41. When was the last time you made the first move? - Neveerrr

42. What is your opinion on electronic music such as dubstep or trap? - h a t e. it's racket, i'm sorry. however they CAN sometimes add something different to a song and make it more fun or different or just pull out a different vibe which I think is cool. I can't listen tho if it's ONLY electronic sounds. it just wears me down until i feel like stabbing my ears with pins.

43. What was the last movie you watched? - Not gonna lie I think it was Halloweentown High a couple weeks ago.

44. Do you like and appreciate your life? - I'm trying to be present and grateful for my life because overall, I feel like there have been this little blessings along the way. I had a good childhood, I had a great dad and I have a wonderful mom, I went to school, I graduated, I've met incredible people, I have a good job that pays well. But I'm still a little unhappy because it doesn't fully look the way I want it to. I'm not totally satisfied yet. So I don't think I fully like it, but I'm trying to.

45. Do you like and appreciate yourself? - No, that's something I really have a hard time accepting.

46. When was the last time you cried? - Yesterday but only got a little teary and I think it was over a tiktok lol. I think I cried a full cry last week but I don't even remember why. It was late at night. I was probably tired.

47. What are you scared of? - Spiders, loss, failure. the fun stuff.

48. What is the most embarrassing, cringe-worthy thing you have ever done? - i can't talk about it

49. What are some of your hobbies? - Reading, writing (obviously), listening to taylor swift music, making lists, scrolling through pinterest/tumblr/instagram, watching youtube.

50. What is a superficial yet annoying mistake you constantly make? - I can't spell occasion or occurrence without autocorrect. Idk if that's superficial or annoying to you but it's annoying to me.

51. Are you a good friend? What makes you a good friend? If not, what makes you a bad friend? - I try to be a good friend but I think there are many areas where I can improve. I think I'm a good friend because I'm deeply loyal and I love deeply. But I think I can be a better listener, less controlling (especially when it comes to things I think they should do vs what they actually do), and I'm really bad at making plans with people.

52. Do you honestly learn from your mistakes? - Yes

53. What have you learned the hard way? - That life is fragile and quick and it's not fair

54. What is the most important thing to have in order to attain happiness? - Contentment

55. Which medium do you use for expressing your artistic emotions? (Singing, writing, etc.) - Writing

56. Are you a creative or a logical thinker? - Creative

57. What is the smartest thing you have ever done? - choosing to stan taylor swift

58. What is your ideal meal? - Just give me a cheeseburger, large free and medium fruitopia from mcdonalds, i'll pretend not to have ibs, and we'll call it a day

59. What is the worst thing someone could do on a date? - talk about their ex or be rude to the wait staff if we're at a restaurant. those would be deal breakers for me.

60. Do you like animals? Which kind is your favorite? - I love hippos, cats, doggos, otters, hedgehogs, turtles, pigs, goats, birds, and raccoons.

61. If you could turn one legal thing illegal, what would it be? - paying minimum wage workers minimum wage. give me 800 bucks an hour for this bs thanks.

62. Do you have any guilty pleasures? - cheesy romance novels and buzzfeed quizzes

63. What is the best thing that the internet has ever created? - youtube. what would i do without tutorials and listening to the game grumps play nonsensical games.

64. Do you like playing video games? Which video games? - I really like choice-based video games like Detroit: Become Human. I also really like something low key like animal crossing where I don't have to think too hard and it's more relaxing than anything else.

65. What is your opinion on beauty in today's society? - Impossible and toxic. you'll never be "right" because it's always changing.

66. Are you a morning person? When do you usually wake up? - Definitely a morning person. I'm usually up between 8 and 9. if I sleep in it's because I didn't sleep well the night before.

67. Do you have a favorite Disney movie? Character? - I think my fav disney movie is Mulan maybe? I'm not too sure on my favourite disney character, I think maybe Prince Naveen from The Princess and The Frog??

68. Would you rather live in the city or in the countryside? - Why can't i have bothhhhh. I've equally wanted to live in a cute apartment in a big city AND on a little farmhouse on a countryside somewhere with a large feel and sunrises that make my heart all achey.

69. Would you rather live near the ocean or in the mountains? - Ocean

70. What are the best things about winter? - Christmastime, cozy sweaters, the crunch of snow under your boots, the pretty lights, coming inside where its arm after shoveling in the cold, hot chocolate, the way the street looks at night with just the streetlights, little snow birds in the trees!! so much so much so much!!!

71. What scares you most about the future? - this is going to sound depressing, but all the loss that waits there. like I know there will be change because everything is always changing and nothing can last forever so the idea of everything being different one day or losing people i love really overwhelms me.

72. What makes you feel old? - GenZ on tik toks making fun of millennials. I'm a "Zillennial" I think because I was born on the cusp of both generations so I relate with both but sometimes they say or do things and I feel like a boomer.

73. How many hours do you spend on the computer or phone on average? -The computer roughly three or four. My phone at least eight or nine hours.

74. What are some of your New Year's resolutions? - Practicing gratefulness and being present

75. What is your life story in 6 words? - What the hell? Well, this sucks.

76. Describe yourself in one word. - Gentle

77. What bad habits do you do? - Nail biting

78. What genre of music do you listen to? - Pop, alternative and worship

79. Most prominent childhood memory? - technically my dad dying - Family vacations to BC I think

80. Imagine if you had an older brother. If you already have one, what is it like? If you don't, how would this change your life? - I feel like my mom would be less stressed with household stuff like mowing the lawn, shoveling, moving furniture, etc. I think it would have been nice to have a brother around, especially after my dad died, but it eeez what it eeeez

81. Spirit animal? - tbh idk

82. Do you believe in horoscopes? - No, but they're fun to read on tumblr

83. What is the worst advice you've ever been given? - I don't think I've ever really had bad advice yet but there's always room for some!

84. List the 3 most important people in your life right now. - My mom, my sister, and my best friend megan

85. Favorite memory of your family. - Any of our family vacations

86. What do you look for in a relationship? - Companionship/Friendship, understanding, similar beliefs, loyalty

87. Do you have a role model? Why or why not? - A few. I really look up to Taylor Swift for obvious reasons because she's a wonderful human and an even better business woman. I look up to my dad because of how much he loved God and was kind to everyone, and I look up to my mom because I admire her strength and how her love grows and grows.

88. What is your opinion on social media? - It's toxic but it's part of our normal life now.

89. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? - A little of both. I think I can be really fatalistic when I'm not doing well, but when I'm in a healthy state I'm fairly optimistic.

90. List some things that you think are overpriced? - Makeup, Skin care, dairy queen combos, shampoo and conditioner.

91. What is your worst memory or creepiest experience? - Worst memory is definitely the one where my dad died.

92. What superpower would ruin the world? - Mind control

93. What is something you swore you would never do when you grew up, but you did anyway? - not go to college immediately. according to eighth grade me, i'm a total disappointment and i should have a full time career by now.

94. What lessons have you learned from movies and which movies were they? - I watched the disney movie Soul and I loved it so much because it was about the main character realizing he was always a musician even if he never made it insanely big. it spoke to me about my writing because I want to be a successful author but I loved the perspective of "you're already a writer"

95. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? - Montreal, NYC, Edinburgh are on the top of my list right now. If I spoke french I'd be moving to montreal tbh

96. How do you approach people? - I don't

97. What is your opinion on first impressions? - They're deceiving

98. What are some things you did as a child that you no longer do? - play with barbies for one thing

99. What languages can you speak? - English (and a couple words in french lmao)

100. What do you think society will be like in 30 years? - I can't even think that far into the future I'm sorry

101. What do you do on your lazy days? - I'm always having a lazy day, but lay around, don't do my makeup or hair, watch youtube, fret about the future, don't eat proper meals, listen to TS, scroll tumblr and then instagram, snapchat with my bestie.

102. What ended your last relationship? - I haven't been in one

103. Favorite food? - Cheesecake

104. What is the most terrifying dream you've ever had? - I'm not sure this is the scariest but I had dream a few years ago that I was in this dark house and there was a demon in the basement and it was pulling me in and I was trying to get away but I couldn't because it was literally sucking me in. I woke up with my heart racing lol

105. When was the last time you got seriously angry? - A couple weeks ago at one of my sister's friends bc I disagreed with something they did.

106. What was the last friendship you broke? - I ended a friendship with a friend about a year ago now because I just didn't feel connected to her anymore

107. Do you have any pet peeves? - TONS. people who don't like taylor swift, people who drag their feet while they're walking so their shoes make scuffing noises, people who put money on the counter instead of into my hand when i'm reaching for it, and people who treat me or others like they're stupid.

108. Who was the last person you gave a hug to? - it's been a while but my mom

109. When was the last time you got seriously stressed? - yesterday bc I couldn't figure out how to hand in my project

110. What are your favourite baby names? - I love Gracie, Ryder, River, Elowen, Leila, Sadie, Spencer, Tatum, Santiago, and Ronan. (I'm kind of into Wilder too but I don't know how I feel about it lol)

#survey

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nightmarebeforewyatt-archiv-blog · 7 years ago

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{kryptonite} || earthquake pt.2

warnings: blood, injury

~thank you to jade and mikyla for letting manipulate sasha and cinder~

The floor felt like ice underneath him and Wyatt reached for his throbbing head before even opening his eyes. His hair was caked with dried blood, meaning the wound had scabbed over, or so he thought. The pain was incredibly sharp and it took Wyatt a minute to remember why it was there in the first place. Once the first memory of the quake came to him, the rest flooded back quickly. His eyes flew open, chest heaving as he shot up from the floor, sitting with his legs in front of him. “Sasha! Where’s Sasha?!” The way his back ached as he sat up suggested that Wyatt had been laying there unconscious for a few hours, but at this moment nothing else mattered. He tried to get up, but Wyatt was hit by a wave of dizziness. He steadied himself even though his hand was burning from the ice like floor. “Sasha! Has anyone seen Sasha?” His voice cracked, not used to projecting this loud. Suddenly, a warmth spread through his fingers, and he glanced down to see where it came from. His eyes met a small hand wearing red nail polish covering his own. “Sash...” The name escaped his lips with so much longing. “Hey Skeleton Boy. I’m here.” Instead of looking up at her, he leaned into her touch until his head was in her lap. Wyatt couldn’t bare to look at her after what he did to her, so he just rested his head, eyes closed as she ran her fingers through his hair. Everything about her was warm, and despite the pain in his head, Wyatt felt at ease. “Are you okay? How are you feeling?” Right now, in this particular moment, Wyatt felt perfectly fine— in fact, he didn’t want to move, ever, but he answered Sasha honestly. “I’m in a little pain, but I’m alright. How’s everyone else, your friends?” Wyatt’s eyes shot open again, and for the first time he saw Sasha’s face and the aftermath of the quake. All Wyatt wanted to do was look away, away from the bruises covering her arms, away from the cuts on her face. He reached up and cupped her face in his hands, lightly tracing over one of the scratches. I did this to her. I hurt her. The realization ate at Wyatt and he had to look away, he had to get away from her, he couldn’t bare to see her like this. Jerking his hand back, Wyatt turned away from her. Sasha’s body tensed at the loss of Wyatt’s touch. Filled with self-hatred, Wyatt stood up again. “Wyatt! You have to lay down, you need rest.” He heard Sasha’s words, but he was determined to get up, he was determined to get away from her, from the damage he had caused. “I’m fine.” She reached out for him once he was up, ignoring the wave of nausea that churned in his stomach. “Just...leave me alone!” Before Sasha could protest, Wyatt walked away, taking a look at his immediate surroundings. Everything around them was destroyed, peopled were lined up at the edges, wounds being tended to by students. There was no cops, no doctors — only students, and it confused Wyatt. As he looked towards the entrance, it was clear to Wyatt why no one else was here — they were trapped. After a few more steps, blackness clouded Wyatt’s vision and he fell to the ground once more, Sasha screaming his name the last thing he heard.

The room was dark except for the small glow coming from the television in Wyatt’s dorm. The scent of popcorn was overwhelming and Wyatt was twisting the cap on his water bottle on and off. Carrie was playing, a movie Wyatt had never seen and Sasha had brought over so they could watch it. Bones was laying comfortably between them, snoring light, “Isn’t it great? Tell me it’s not great?” Sasha had been asking every ten minutes or so and Wyatt always had the same reply. “It hasn’t finished yet, so I can’t fully appreciate it yet.” At the response, she would throw a few pieces of popcorn in his direction. Most of the time they would land on Bones and he would wake up long enough to eat them before laying his head back in Sasha’s lap.

Waking up groggy for the second time, Wyatt winced at the pain in his head. “Sasha, he’s awake.” The voice was extremely familiar and he would recognize it anywhere. “Cinder...don’t. I can’t see her right now.” The words were almost inaudible coming from his mouth, but his long time friend understood them. Wyatt kept his eyes closed. “Sorry. False alarm.” Cinder called out in the opposite direction. “You know you’re going to have to face her eventually. You saved her life.” Saved her? From the ceiling, yes, but from me, no. “I may have saved her from the debris, but I still pushed her into to danger. I still hurt her. I hurt everyone.” Cinder had been through this before. “Skellington, you are so melodramatic.” It was a common phrase for Cinder to say when she was around Wyatt. Because he tended to overthink things, Cinder was always there to pull him away from his thoughts with a sarcastic comment. Wyatt smirked at his long time friend. “Well melodramatic is my middle name according to you. How are you by the way? Are you hurt?” He cracked an eye open, assessing the damages, but it turned out to be nothing more than a few cuts a bruises. Even though he and Cinder didn’t always see eye to eye or hang out as much, especially since they got to WDA, he was concerned about her and if this taught him anything, he wouldn’t avoid his friend anymore. “I’m alright, but I’m more concerned about you. You look like hell, Skellington.” Wyatt shrugged his shoulders as much as he could with still being laid out on the floor, trying to make it seem like it wasn’t a big deal, but the comment did worry him a bit. He’d had his fair share of injuries, but none of them were bad because he didn’t really have a lot of things to break. He was a rag doll, things that would normally be serious for others were minor injuries for Wyatt. This was the exact mindset he had when he pushed Sasha out of the way; he figured anything that happened to him wouldn’t be as bad as what could’ve happened to her. “So how long do I have to cover for you this time?” It wasn’t an odd question for Cinder to ask; she did have a track record of taking the blame for their old shenanigans in Halloweentown, their failed attempts at messing with Oogie Boogie, but in this context, and her tone of voice, made the question strange. “I’m not sure, I just can’t look at Sasha right now...I can’t look at the dried blood on her face and the blackness painting her arms. Why do you ask?” Cinder chuckled. “You’re girlfriend is walking over.” Wyatt’s eyes flew open and he sat up looking around to see where Sasha was coming from. “She’s not my-” Wyatt started but Cinder had already gotten up off the floor, ready to leave Wyatt and Sasha alone. “Help me up.” It was more of a demand and against Cinder’s better judgement, she reached out and pulled him to his feet. The second Sasha reached the spot where they were standing Cinder took it as her cue to leave, but Wyatt reached out and lightly grabbed her arm. His eyes pleaded for her to stay and so she did.

They talked for a bit, wondering when the rescue team would arrive, before Wyatt began to feel dizzy for a third time, so he excused himself to go get water. Sasha tried to protest, but Wyatt just shook his head and tired to convince them he was capable of walking. “He can be pretty stubborn sometimes. Best to just let him be.” Cinder stated trying to reassure Sasha. As Wyatt poured himself some water he heard voice on the other side of the blocked entrance. Wondering if he was just hearing things, Wyatt shook his head, trying to fight the newest wave of nausea. Taking a sip of water, Wyatt turned on his heels to make his way back over to the girls, but a large crash followed by a low rumble caught his attention. Everyone in the ballroom turned towards the entrance just in time to see the recuse team break through the debris. Whatever they had done to break through sent a few small pieces of the collapsed columns his way. “Wyatt look out!” Something hit him in the head, sending a new kind of pain that ran from his head to his spine. His hand, now completely out of his control, released the cup of water sending it plummeting to the ground, Wyatt following shortly after.

“What’s going on? What’s wrong with him? Please help him. Please somebody!” Sasha was screaming, tears running down her face. “Ms. De Vil, we are doing everything we can.” She knew they were, but she felt like it wasn’t enough.“I don’t understand. I heard one of the doctors say ‘coma’. Is it true?” The doctors had safely strapped Wyatt’s seemingly lifeless body to the gurney and were now putting him into the ambulance. The doctor that had spoken to her before, now wouldn’t make eye contact with her. “Is it?” Her voice cracked with fear. “Why won’t you answer me? Why won’t anyone tell me what’s going on?” Cinder was still standing by frozen in her spot as she watched her friend being placed in an ambulance. “Wyatt? Wyatt can you hear me?”

Everything was cold, and there was a metallic taste in the air. He wasn’t sure how he got here, but one thing was for sure — Wyatt was strapped to Dr. Finkelstein’s table. A very quiet voice called out his name and he couldn’t quite make out who it was. He tried to struggle and call out for Sasha, but nothing was working. He had no control over his body; it was like he was trapped in his mind.

“Someone please remove Ms. De Vil from the scene. We need to transport Mr. Skellington to the hospital.” Sasha was reaching for Wyatt, completely distraught at the lack of information she was getting. Cinder came and pulled her back, politely shushing her. “Cinder, please. Let me go. I have to go with him. What if something happens? He can’t leave me. I have to go!” Sasha tried to escape her grasp, but Cinder was stronger than she looked. “Sasha, calm down. I’ll drive you to the hospital. We will follow the ambulance. Just please relax.” Finally calming down, Sasha nodded in Cinder’s direction. “Where’s your car?”

#i'd rather feel pain than nothing at all || self para #sp: kryptonite #wda: earthquake #trigger warnings #tw: injuries #tw: blood

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servinglemonade · 7 years ago

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My Favorite Christmas Movies

Hello everyone! How is everyone on this beautiful Christmas Eve? I hope you’re doing great! If not, I think these movies will cheer you up in no time. Let’s get festive!

Home Alone We all know the well-known story of Kevin McCallister (Macaulay Culkin) who was left home alone by his family during the Holidays. He has to fight some bad guys in the funniest way possible. How many have I seen this movie? Too many times to count. Do I still enjoy it every single Christmas? Yes! It’s such a timeless classic that it is now a Christmas tradition to watch it. I love Home Alone 2 and 3 as well, but nothing compares to 1!

The Santa Clause One of my favorites! Scott Calvin (Tim Allen) makes Santa fall off the roof and after putting on his suit, he becomes Santa and everything that comes with that. This movie is funny, heartwarming and will put you in a good mood in no time! The Santa Clause 2 and 3 are great as well, but 1 is the best!

The Nightmare Before Christmas This movie is the best of both worlds. Christmas and Halloween in one! Jack Skellington is fed up with being the Pumpkin King and seeks something new. He stumbles upon Christmas Town and likes it so much, he wants to start to celebrate it in Halloweentown as well. This movie is so good, so much fun and it has songs! Nothing is better than that.

Elf This movie is one of the funniest ever! Buddy The Elf (Will Ferrell) grows up on The North Pole but discovers he is a human and wants to meet his real father, who lives in New York. And that creates for some very funny events! When Buddy goes to Gimbels for the first time is probably the funniest part of the movie! It’s such a classic.

The Polar Express This movie is about a young boy who embarks on a magical journey to the North Pole by train, The Polar Express. He learns about friendship, bravery and the meaning of Christmas. With the amazing talent of Tom Hanks as the conductor of The Polar Express (and five other parts), this movie is one of my favorites. It truly warms my heart and the soundtrack is amazing as well! Highly recommend this one.

The Holiday The Holiday is about two women with guy-problems that swap homes in each other's countries, where they each meet a local guy and fall in love. This movie, starring Kate Winslet, Cameron Diaz, Jack Black, and Jude Law, is so romantic! I recently watched it just sitting on the couch with a blanket and a cup of tea and it was great #mood. It also has it’s funny moments, so it’s perfect for the Holidays (see what I did there).

Honorable Mentions How The Grinch Stole Christmas Winnie the Pooh: A Very Merry Pooh Year Beauty And The Beast: An Enchanted Christmas New Years Eve Arthur Christmas

Those are my favorite Christmas movies! I hope you enjoyed the post and wish every single one of you a very Merry Christmas!

Stay Festive!

Yenai

#entertainment #christmas movies #christmas #home alone #servinglemonade #movies #christmas post #the santa clause #elf #the nightmare before christmas #the polar express #the holiday #disney #disney christmas

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destressjournal · 4 years ago

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Ranking all (109?) DCOMS

Yes! It will be a challenge but I already ranked all 58 Disney animated movies, and once I complete more rankings, maybe I’ll start a blog/podcast about that. Who knows.

The easy part about ranking the Disney films was that each film was unique. The Disney channel films....many of them are pretty similar so I have to remember what each film was about. And this blog can be my way of writing those thoughts down!

So here are my rankings for the 10 first ever Disney channel films!

10. You Lucky Dog

I never heard of this film before i decided to watch all of these in order. And I think there’s a reason. It’s fucking weird. Someone must have been high or something when coming up for the premise of this movie. Like I thought it was supposed to be a movie like Beethoven or Air Bud, just a cute little dog movie about a wacky dog that turns a family up-side down. But no, it’s a dog...therapist??? That had the ability to channel a dog’s mind when he was 14, yet built an entire business based on that ability that he LOST and never got back....and people bought into it??? It’s just the weirdest movie and I really didn’t enjoy a grown man acting and talking like a dog throughout like half the movie. It was weird. I liked the dog. But the rest I didn’t like.

9. Genius

This movie was also weird....but it was better than You Lucky Dog. The logic and the plot points of the story just didn’t line up for me, and the main character was extremely cringey. I had to pause every 10-15 minutes because I literally couldn’t take it. His acting was great! But the lines he was given aren’t good. The story is also really weird, like he was lying about his identity, enrolled himself in middle school while being a college student, faking an entire personality and purposely failed most of his classes, tried everything he could to be in two places at once throughout the whole movie, almost killed everyone in the ice rink due to his negligence of his machine, all to impress some girl. None of the characters I thought were believable, not because of their acting but because of the dialogue and the story, it just doesnt make any sense. But at least it’s about a kid genius and NOT a dog therapist, lol.

8. Brink!

When I first saw this movie I thought it was fine, and then I sat with it for a bit and it got further down my list. There are parts of the story that don’t make sense to me, like don’t you have to compete in the invitational to compete in the championship? Cuz the main characters didn’t even show up and they’re still able to enroll their team in the finals?? And it’s supposed to be a national event of the best teams in the country, and these kids literally just stroll in out of nowhere with their dinky dog groomer shirts, can just sign up, and then beat all the professional sponsored teams?? So yeah, this movie loses points because the logic doesn’t line up. But I think the lesson is good, that who you are is different than what you do, and that your value shouldn’t be determined by how productive you are at something. The execution of that lesson is a little iffy though.

7. Under Wraps

The first ever DCOM and it shows. DCOMs will never be like this ever again! It was more mature and dark than anything we have today on Disney channel. That alone gives it some points. However, as a movie, it’s missing the connection you make with the characters. I just personally didn’t think any of them were interesting. The mummy was cute and funny at times, but sometimes the slapstick jokes and gags were a little over the top. Also, I just kept hearing Patrick from spongebob every time the mummy made any noise, and that ruined it a little for me. I know it’s the same voice actor lol. But I do like the touch that the main character’s mom’s bf are the same actor, making the connection between them a little easier. And at least the logic (pretty much) lined up for this movie. I might watch every Halloween, we’ll see.

6. Can of Worms

This movie was only SLIGHTLY better than Under Wraps. And that’s only because I felt a good connection with the main character, Mike. You can tell because I actually remembered his name. He’s a relatable character to me and his acting was very good. I have personally met people that talk and act exactly like Mike, and I honestly think his character represents someone on the autism spectrum very well (I’m autistic too so don’t get mad at me stereotyping). I’m not saying he represents everybody, or even me, just that I’ve met people like him before. His desire to fit in and be normal, and then later his desire to get off earth, was I think the most powerful part of the movie. He truly believed he was an alien from outer space because it made more sense in his mind than believing he was just different, because there was no possible way he could be the same species if everything he says and does is considered “weird”. I related SO hard to this, because it’s exactly what being autistic can be like. I was really into the first half of the movie, and then....the second half with the aliens was just dumb. It became a generic alien monster movie, with some tiny good parts sprinkled in. But the ending just didn’t make sense....mike still plays football at the end even though he’s not good and doesn’t like it....? Like he’s still trying to force it because he thinks “this is where he belongs”. Like you could have easily showed him building robots with new friends in robotics club (something that he’s good at and likes) and then hanging out with the rest of his friends after to send that message home. That you can usually find a place where you belong. So anyway, this movie is stuck in the middle for me.

5. Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century

Now we’re gonna get into the more popular ones. I think I would have enjoyed this so much more as a kid, but I didn’t grow up with it. This was my first ever viewing. The movie itself is pretty good, and it’s so interesting to see what people in the late 90’s thought about what the future would be like. Flying cars, computers you can hold in your hand, taking commercial flights to space, etc. but it was all still based on 90’s technology at the same time, it was really interesting. The biggest aspect of the movie that makes it lose points for me, is Zenon as a character. I like her, don’t get me wrong! But she hardly changes throughout the movie. Yes she learns to like earth but then at the end of the movie she’s happy to be back in space and that’s it. Now, I haven’t seen the sequels yet, but JUST based on this movie alone, I think it would have been more valuable to show her traveling back and forth, or say “Hey Greg, wanna see each other next week?” Just something to show that she likes earth now. But even then, that’s the only aspect of her that changed. All the antics she got in were justifiable, she was right the whole time. It was on everyone else to change to see her perspective. And I just don’t like when movies do this. I need characters to have reasonable flaws and learn to either accept them or change them depending on the situation. Also, this is just a little nit pick, but WOW that song at the end was so bad yet it’s STILL stuck in my head...they call this a rock and roll song yet I didn’t hear any guitar or bass. Even the drums were just kicks and pops made on the computer, that doesn’t sound like what an actual drum sounds like...It’s just a pop song. Call it for what it is people! The lyrics were good tho.

4. Halloweentown

I’ll probably get some hate for putting this at number 4, but when I was watching another review on a YouTube channel, they pointed out how annoying Marnie was, and now I see it. She’s not unbearably annoying, but enough to be like “wow, this kid is a bit of a brat. I would never talk to my mom like that.” On one hand, I see how she matured throughout the movie, so I think it makes sense for her to be a little obnoxious and naive, she’s just a kid. On the other hand, you’re supposed to like your main character and root for them, which doesn’t help if you think they’re a brat. I didn’t grow up with this movie either, so maybe that’s why I didnt immediately put it as number 1, cuz there’s no nostalgia factor. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t like it. It’s still a good movie that I will watch every halloween! I liked the characters and the story, and things seemed to flow together pretty well. The only reason it lost points for me, were the over-the-top gags. I get it, the movie is made for kids, and I always keep that in mind when I watch these, but sometimes it gets a little too silly for a movie about a dark overlord who wants to get rid of humans. Idk. Still like it though!

3. The Thirteenth Year

Okay, I admit it. This one is a guilty pleasure for me. I’m sorry. I feel like Halloweentown should be at 3 and this one at 4 if I want to be truly objective, but I have too many nostalgia feels for this movie. And I like that the tone is more serious and there aren’t any silly over-the-top gags. But that doesn’t mean this movie is perfect, it’s at number 3 for a reason. The last few times I watched this were when I was a kid in the early 2000’s, so as a kid I loved this movie. And I was also obsessed with mermaids and I wanted to be one so bad. This movie kind of fulfilled this dream for me, and other movies like Aquamarine and The Little mermaid. But anyway, after watching this as an adult, it doesn’t exactly hold up. Sam is kind of an annoying character who doesn’t add much to the movie. She’s just the popular girl, and another reason for Cody to stay with the popular crowd. She gives him a picture of herself as a birthday gift...? I think it would be an okay anniversary gift for adults who are dating, not kids. It just rubs me the wrong way. Also, the kid who plays Cody is not a very good actor...he’s just okay. Everything else about the movie, still love!!

2. Smart House

I grew up with this one too, and again, they try to imagine what a futuristic house would look like in the 90’s. And half that stuff actually came true with things like Siri and alexa, which is pretty neat to see almost 30 years after this movie came out. Still what kid wouldn’t want to have a giant screen on their wall showing something like a music video, the beach, or a basketball game. Every kid wanted to live in that smart house back then. The movie still holds up pretty well today, not because of the technology but because of the message and the characters. All of the actors and actresses were wonderful! The story is so sad but believable. I’ve never gone through a parent death, but I’ve had friends that have, and it’s such a weird dynamic when the other parent starts dating for the first time after. I can’t imagine what effect that can have on a young child. At least when my friends went through it they were at least in high school, if not, college. So they had a bit more understanding/maturity about it. But yeah, the kid who plays Ben rocked his part. Some tiny nitpicks include the house itself being somewhat outdated now, and the side characters presence in the film. They don’t have much significance, idk. The movie really tugs at your emotions, and is definitely the movie that got me closest to crying so far.

1. Johnny Tsunami

This was my first viewing, as I didn’t grow up with this one either. Compared to Smart House, which is honestly just an emotional roller coaster, this is just a good movie imo. It was more epic, it had more diversity, great acting, and a plot that made sense thematically. There wasn’t over-the-top slapstick gags, and I think it teaches good lessons about life. I honestly thought the grandpa was gonna die because that’s usually what happens to old wise mentors, but I’m glad it stayed away from that trope and actually brought him back for the end of the movie. I thought that was an interesting touch. Basically, while I was watching these I was thinking “okay this can be done better” “I don’t like this” “this feels too forced”, but with this one, I was just watching a movie most of the time. I honestly don’t know how it could be much better. It’s still not the best Disney channel movie ever (I’m guessing), and it still has some flaws. For example, the girl character was being such a flip flop throughout the whole movie and was being a little too mean to Johnny. Another tiny nitpick is when johnny’s parents are like “yeah we’re moving to Vermont” I was expecting a little more pushback from Johnny but he’s like “awww okay” and idk what to think about it because it could be considered out of character. Otherwise, this is a great unique movie that I will definitely rewatch in the future.

For every movie that I watch, I’m going to review it separately and that’s how I’ll keep track of my thoughts as I go through each film. But this is where I stand for the first 10 DCOMs. Unlike the Disney animated classics, I don’t know what my number one film is. Right now it’s Johnny Tsunami but that is definitely going to change. I can’t wait to see what my personal favorite will be! It may come down to several.

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