#and yes I'm including starving children

[furrbbyx]

Day 11346 of not waking up in a monster cuddle pile like god intended. I'll never reach nirvana at this rate

[earlgraytay]

I really wish that people had a better grasp on what The Average Person's Life was like pre-industrialization. If you're living in the global North the odds are good that your life is, in fact, better than a medieval king- yes, even with the political stuff- and would make your ancestors cry wild tears of envy.

The things that suck about your life are things that suck about the baseline human condition (at least since the invention of agriculture, but that's 10,000 years of humanity). Yes, including all the political stuff.

The baseline human condition is "being terrified of losing the harvest and starving", compared to that, losing a job is no big deal. (It's bad, it can be life-upendingly bad, but it's still not "you are guaranteed to die if you screw this up" bad for most people.)

The baseline human condition is "getting kicked around by a tin pot dictator", whether that be a king, a baron, a warlord, or a chief; it's taken centuries of social technology to get the world to a point where that's Not Normal.

The baseline human condition is "losing multiple siblings and/or children at a young age to diseases that are entirely preventable". That's a shocking tragedy now. The baseline human condition is "being in the pathway of said tinpot dictator's wars of conquest" and having to deal with soldiers' pillage, looting, and worse (even if they're nominally on your side). That is, again, a shocking tragedy-- it still happens, and happens in way too much of the world, but no one is going to tell you that it's normal.

I'm not saying that we can sit back and rest on our laurels. We can't. I've been calling the pre-industrial world the "baseline human condition" for a reason- unless you're very, very careful, that's what your society eventually reverts to. It takes a lot of people working very hard to make sure you don't have to live at the baseline human condition, and if you start slacking on that, you start backsliding into it.

How we treat each other- and how we use the technology, material and social, that we've developed to make things easier- matters. We can make the world even better than it is now. We can also make it significantly worse. The choice is ours.

...But if you know that you can reliably have food regardless of the season, you don't live in fear of a random attack killing you tomorrow, and you can listen to music on command whenever you want? You do actually live a better life than a medieval king. Because even kings and emperors were much closer to the baseline human condition than a random farm worker in Bumfuck, Iowa is today.

[edenesth]

TWTHH Spinoff: Until I Found You [1]

Pairing: prince!Yeosang x princess!reader

AU: historical au (Joseon era)

Word Count: 6.8k

Summary: It had been a while since Lady Park's firm rejection, and the fourth prince was beginning to believe he would never get over her. Though the heartbreak had made him more mature, one thing remained unchanged: his stubborn reluctance to marry. Convinced he would never find someone who could understand his pain as deeply as the general's wife, he was unprepared for the surprise life had in store for him—one that came in the form of a foreign princess.

A/N: As stated in the title, this is a spinoff. If you have yet to check out the main story, it's probably better to read that before starting this.

Main Story | Spinoff Masterlist | Part 2

"A peace treaty with Joseon? What do you think Father is going to offer them?" you wondered aloud, staring at your reflection in the ornate gold mirror as your mother gently combed your hair.

She sighed, her face filled with dread. "What else do you think, my dear? Another daughter, obviously. Lord have mercy on whichever poor soul has to be sacrificed."

Your fists clenched involuntarily, clutching the fabric of your robes at the thought. You couldn't imagine the horror: what if it was you? To be torn from your family, everyone you loved, everything you knew, and sent off to a foreign land to marry a complete stranger and live the rest of your life in isolation. "Mother, this is cruelty."

"This is reality, sweetheart."

You winced at her words. She was right, and you hated it. The mere thought of being separated from your mother, Royal Concubine Sarisu of Ruhon, was beyond unbearable. You were all she had, and she was everything to you.

Reaching for her hands, you squeezed them and smiled sadly up at her. Once, she had been the most favoured concubine, steadily climbing the ranks, poised to take the spot beside the then-empty throne. But then the current Her Majesty arrived. With her strong family ties and influential background, she immediately stole away all your mother's chances of ever becoming Queen.

But that wasn't all she stole.

She took everything, including all your father's affections, leaving him with no room for your mother or you. Since then, the two of you had been reduced to mere decorations in the grand palace of Ruhon, often labelled the rejects of His Majesty. You were invisible to him, merely waiting for the end of your days to come.

Neither of you were fools; you knew what people said about you both. But it didn't matter. You were grateful not to be starving on the streets and to still have a roof over your heads, even if it was nowhere near as luxurious as the Queen and her children's chambers. No matter how much favour your mother had lost, at least the King was still kind enough to let you both keep your titles and everything else.

Or was he really?

Perhaps you shouldn't have spoken about it. Now, you had jinxed it. You should have known, should have realised why he had kept you around. You had your own uses and were finally coming in handy now. The realisation struck when a eunuch rushed into your chambers, which was an unusual occurrence, bowing lightly—nothing like the deep bows usually reserved for other royals.

"Princess Sarisu, you have been summoned by His Majesty the King and are expected in the throne room this instant," he announced, gesturing towards the exit. "Please allow me to escort you there."

He let out a small, impatient huff when you remained frozen in your spot, exchanging horrified looks with your mother. "Come now, Your Highness. We mustn't upset His Majesty any further."

She cleared her throat, nodding encouragingly despite her trembling hands. "Go on, my dear. I'm sure it's nothing, hm? Maybe your father simply wishes to catch up." Not wanting her to worry, you forced a smile. "Yes, Mother. You're probably right."

You weren't sure who you were trying to convince with those foolish white lies, but a part of you clung to the hope that was all it was. With that, you followed the eunuch towards the throne room.

The palace corridors seemed colder, the shadows darker, as you walked. Each step echoed ominously, amplifying the anxiety churning in your stomach. You could feel the eyes of courtiers and servants on you, their whispers adding to the tension.

Finally, you reached the grand doors of the throne room. They loomed before you, heavy and imposing. The eunuch pushed them open, revealing the vast chamber within. At the far end, on the elevated throne, sat your father, the King. His expression was stern, his gaze piercing as it settled on you.

"Approach," he commanded, his voice resonating through the hall.

You walked forward, your heart pounding in your chest. As you neared the throne, you dropped to your knees, bowing deeply. "This princess greets Your Majesty," you greeted, your voice trembling despite your efforts to remain composed.

Your father studied you for a moment before speaking, "I hope you have been well, princess. I will not bother beating around the bush; you are at the perfect age for marriage, and it is time you fulfil your duty. The peace treaty with Joseon has been finalised. It has been decided that you are to be sent as part of the agreement. We leave in a week to celebrate your future union with Ninth Prince Yeochan."

The words struck you like a blow. Your worst fears had come true. You were to be sacrificed for the sake of the kingdom, sent away to a foreign land to marry a stranger. Your mind raced, struggling to process the reality of your fate.

Oh god, it's really happening... to me.

"Father, please..." you began, but he raised a hand, silencing you.

"Look at me, princess. This is not a question, it's an order," he commanded, his gaze steely and unyielding despite your tear-filled eyes. You were bewildered; you were merely the daughter of a concubine. It was usually only princesses born from the Queen who had to marry for the nation's sake.

"But Father—" you fell to your knees, prepared to beg for mercy.

He snarled, "No buts! Your sisters are too young for this. Her Majesty and I have deliberated long and hard. You're the only one fit for the task. You'll do well to make your mother proud. I know you're upset about leaving her behind, but you're a princess, and you know what that means. Your sacrifice will save Ruhon…"

Yes, from your reckless decisions.

If only he hadn't rashly launched a sudden attack on Joseon, none of this would have happened. Peace would have prevailed, and you wouldn't have to be offered as a pawn in the war he instigated. You weren't stupid; he was giving you up because this was a deal with the enemy. The Queen's daughters were too precious to be sent away.

"Oh, come now, my daughter. Just be grateful you aren't marrying the dreadful fourth prince of Joseon. I'm sure their ruler still has some conscience. You'll be fine."

Easy for you to say, Father...

One week. That was all the time you were given to come to terms with your fate—to be the chosen pawn sent to Joseon, to spend these final days with your mother before departing forever. Reality wasn't cruel; your father was. You had never harboured such profound hatred for him as you did now. Oh, your poor mother. How would she endure the emptiness of the palace alone? Your heart ached with the mere thought of her grieving in the cold confines of your shared chambers, her life overshadowed by your absence.

Though you faced a grim future, perhaps far worse than hers, all you could think about was the one person who meant everything to you—the one who had brought you into this world, nurtured you, protected you, and showered you with endless love. And now, you were leaving her behind forever.

The days blurred together in a haze of sorrow and apprehension. You clung to your mother, finding solace in shared memories and whispered reassurances. The palace, once your sanctuary, now felt like a gaol, each room a reminder of the departure that loomed ahead.

On the final night, she held you tightly, her voice trembling with unshed tears. "You are strong, my dear. Remember that. No matter what happens, hold on to who you are. Go and make us all proud."

You nodded, tears mingling with hers. "I will, Mother. I promise. Don't worry about me and take good care of yourself."

The next morning arrived far too soon. As you prepared to leave, you took a last, lingering look around your chamber, memorising every detail. Then, with a heavy heart, you followed the royal guard sent to escort you. Walking through the palace corridors for the final time, the weight of your destiny pressed heavily upon you.

At last, you reached the courtyard where the grand carriage awaited. Your father stood beside it, his face a mask of indifference. He offered no words as you approached, only a curt nod. "Come, let us go."

With one final, sorrowful glance at your mother, you climbed into the carriage. As it began to move, you watched her silhouette grow smaller and smaller until she was nothing more than a distant memory.

Thus, you set off towards an uncertain future, your heart heavy with grief and dread, knowing you were leaving behind everything you had ever known and loved.

Goodbye, Ruhon... goodbye, Mother.

"Your Highness, how should we announce you at the banquet?" the King of Joseon asked, smiling warmly down at you.

Your father straightened up proudly beside you, about to answer on your behalf, but you quickly bowed. "Please announce me as Princess Sarisu, Your Majesty, as I have always been known in Ruhon."

The Joseon ruler's eyes widened slightly at the realisation. "Ah, so this is the famous Royal Concubine Sarisu's only daughter. That explains your exceptional beauty. And here, we assumed a princess from Her Majesty of Ruhon would be offered to us." It was a subtle jab at your father, who had thought he could deceive the court by presenting you as a Crown Princess.

Your father's smile was steely, masking the fury that boiled inside him. He trembled with anger at your betrayal—exposing your true identity by using your mother's name, despite his stern reminder that you were to pose as one of the Queen's daughters.

Call it your little revenge if you will.

"No matter, Father. I consider myself fortunate to be matched with such a beauty. After all, I, too, am a son of a concubine. We are quite the match," said Prince Yeochan, your betrothed, as he bowed respectfully to his father and yours. His words might charm most, but you doubted their sincerity. Living in a palace, you had seen your share of false pleasantries and performative kindness.

The King of Joseon nodded approvingly. "As you should be, Ninth Prince. I expect you to treat your future wife well. Now let us adults discuss the wedding plans. You may show your fiancée to her temporary quarters."

"Yes, Father," the young prince responded, then approached you, offering his arm. "Come, my princess."

Despite the grandeur of your reception, it was clear that the welcome was more for show than genuine warmth. This became evident when you arrived at your assigned quarters, a small and secluded part of the palace, far from the bustling main areas where the rest of the royal family and court members congregated.

"Thank you, Your Highness, for showing me here," you said politely.

At that moment, the facade of the dutiful son vanished. Yeochan smirked humourlessly. "Save it. It doesn't matter if you're the daughter of a concubine or the Queen; you're still Ruhon scum to me. Don't think that just because you're here showing me your faux politeness, you can fool me. I don't trust you, princess," he spat.

You sighed, your shoulders slumping. There it was, his true nature revealed. Not that you hadn't anticipated this. Given the history between your nations, it was inevitable. You were the princess from the country that had dared to attack his own, a symbol of betrayal and defeat, delivered to their doorstep after your father's cowardly surrender. You could have argued, defended yourself, but it was clear there was no point. His hatred was deep-rooted and unwavering.

The ninth prince huffed at your silence. "I'll make this clear: you will do well to cooperate and play the perfect couple with me in public. But do not expect anything when we're alone. You are nothing more than a political pawn in this game. Remember that."

You met his gaze, your own eyes steady and resolute. "I understand, Your Highness. I will fulfil my duty as expected."

He sneered, turning on his heel and leaving you alone in your sparse quarters. As the door closed behind him, the reality of your situation settled over you like a heavy shroud. The grandeur of the palace felt hollow, a gilded cage in which you were now imprisoned.

Tears threatened to spill, but you blinked them back, refusing to succumb to despair. You had to be strong, for your mother, for yourself. No matter how cold and unwelcoming this place was, you would endure. You had no other choice.

I'll be fine, Mother... I'll live.

The rest of the day had been spent wandering aimlessly within your quarters. The thought of dining with your father was unbearable; after the stunt you had pulled earlier, you dreaded to think what he might say or do. So, you remained secluded in your room, staring at the miserable meal the palace maids had brought you.

Their reluctance to serve you had been apparent. A few bolder ones had whispered about you not so discreetly, their words cutting through the fragile composure you were trying to maintain. Feeling the tension and disdain in the air, you had dismissed them, preferring solitude over their barely concealed contempt.

Staring at the plain bowl of rice and a few meagre side dishes, your appetite vanished. You knew enough about Joseon to recognise that this meal was far from a luxury. It was a clear message: you were not welcome here, not valued, not respected.

Heaving a deep sigh, you thought of your poor mother. How was she coping with your absence? Was she as lonely and lost as you felt in this foreign place? The ache of missing her was a constant, gnawing pain, a reminder of everything you had been forced to leave behind.

As night fell, the shadows in your room grew longer, mirroring the gloom that settled over your heart. The palace, with all its splendour, felt like a prison. The heavy silence pressed down on you, amplifying the sense of isolation. You were a stranger in an enemy land, alone and uncertain of the future.

But you knew you had to endure.

For your mother, for your people, and most importantly, for yourself. No matter how bleak the present seemed, you clung to a glimmer of hope. Perhaps, in time, you would find a way to navigate this treacherous path and carve out a place for yourself in this unforgiving world. Until then, all you could do was survive, one day at a time.

You had gone to bed with a heavy heart, fully aware that this was now your reality, and nothing could change it. A part of you was determined to make the best of your situation despite the hostility you faced. Perhaps it was the adrenaline and emotional exhaustion from the day that allowed you to fall asleep without much trouble on your first night in this foreign land.

The following morning, you were awakened by the same group of maids assigned to you. They were there to bathe and dress you, and knowing you had no choice but to comply, you obediently allowed them to do as they pleased. You endured every harsh tug and rough handling without a single complaint as they prepared you for the day.

"Thank you, you may go," you said, dismissing the group of maids as soon as they had finished their task. Sitting in front of the mirror, you took in your new appearance. It was a sobering reminder that you were about to be a princess of Joseon. The foreign hanbok and hairdo, though simpler and less dramatic than Ruhon's style, were beautiful in their own right.

You reached a hand behind to stroke the single gold hairpin tucked into the neat low bun on your head, then moved down to touch the smooth lavender fabric now adorning your body. "Hmm, not bad at all," you murmured to yourself.

Despite the simplicity, there was a quiet elegance to the attire. The colours were soft and soothing, a stark contrast to the vibrant and intricate garments you were accustomed to. You could see yourself getting used to these outfits. This was your new reality, and you were determined to find beauty and strength in it, no matter how challenging the circumstances.

With a deep breath, you rose from your seat and steeled yourself for the day ahead. You knew it wouldn't be easy, but you resolved to face whatever came your way with grace and resilience. Knowing that no one, especially not your fiancé, would show you around the palace grounds, you resolved to explore the place on your own. With the banquet scheduled for the next night, you had this day to yourself. What better way to spend it than embarking on a little adventure?

Finally free from the pressure and the sensation of walking on eggshells, you wandered the palace grounds with awe. The buildings and their architecture were new and different, capturing your attention at every turn. You nodded politely at any passing palace staff who, despite their reluctance or displeasure, still greeted you with courtesy. Your attire signified your status, and rules were rules; they couldn't possibly ignore you in broad daylight.

Amid your exploration, you stumbled upon what seemed to be a tranquil cherry blossom garden. Though the flowers were not in bloom, you could imagine how breathtaking this place would be in the right season. You made a mental note to return when the cherry blossoms were in full glory.

Deciding to take a walk inside, you were unprepared for the sight that greeted you. In one of the many pavilions, diligently practising calligraphy, was a figure that resembled a celestial being. The scene was almost ethereal: the serene garden, the elegant strokes of the brush, the calm concentration on the person's face.

Could he be a scholar...?

Your breath caught in your throat. The figure was dressed in simple yet refined garments. The rhythmic movements of the brush were mesmerising, each stroke deliberate and graceful. You couldn't help but feel as though you were intruding upon a sacred moment. But you couldn't turn away as you moved closer, recognising the poem being written.

"Is that Hwaseoljedeungnubu by Shin Sukju?" you asked softly.

At your question, the person's head whipped up. It took him a moment to respond, but he did eventually. "Yes, it is."

You nodded in approval, a small smile on your lips, pleased that he had yet to frown or react negatively as most people had so far. "Nice penmanship, by the way."

He cleared his throat, slightly flustered. "Thank you."

To say that Yeosang was surprised would be the understatement of the century. Only the most highly educated individuals could recognise this series of poems exchanged between Joseon officials and Ming Dynasty envoys. He wouldn't have been surprised if even most low-ranking officials were not well-versed in this.

First of all, you were a woman, and most women, despite being educated, did not study these texts. Secondly, you were clearly not local; your accent gave that away. Were you perhaps a visiting guest here for the banquet celebrating the union with Ruhon?

But above all else, did you... not know who he was? Even if you didn't, most people turned away as soon as they spotted the dreadful red mark beside his left eye, which was not hard to miss.

When you bit your lip earnestly and stepped into the pavilion, asking, "Do you mind if I join you?" The fourth prince furrowed his brows and placed down his brush, lifting his head to look at you properly, giving you a clear view of his birthmark.

"Are you certain, my lady? Why would you want to sit with me?"

You blinked, confused by the question. "I-I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I don't understand—"

He sighed, pointing at the mark on his face. "Do you not see this?"

You nodded slowly, still lost. "Yes, and?"

His brows flew up at your nonchalant response, and he took a deep gulp. "What—are you not disgusted?"

You frowned. "That's a strong word, but... am I supposed to be? By what exactly?"

He finally gave in, taking a moment to process the fact that standing before him was someone who did not see anything wrong with him—the second person to do so after Lady Park. He motioned to the seat opposite him. "Please, have a seat."

You smiled gratefully and settled across from him. He waited for you to be seated before beginning his introduction. "I apologise for my unusual questions. I… I'm Yeosang, the Fourth Prince of Joseon."

He held his breath as your eyes widened in realisation, bracing himself for the rejection he was so accustomed to. But it didn't come. Instead, your lips formed a small pout as you observed him. "So, you're the famous Fourth Prince Yeosang… I don't get it."

He chuckled in bewilderment. "What don't you get, my lady?"

"Why do they call you dreadful? I've only been here for a day and a half, met a handful of people, and you're the first and only one to treat me with equal respect. Besides, you're… very attractive. I don't understand why they'd call you—" Your eyes landed on the birthmark. "Ah, so that's why…"

He nodded solemnly, trying not to show how much it affected him. "Yes, all because of this one stupid mark."

You pursed your lips. "Well, if it's worth anything, I think you're beautiful. People can be cruel for no reason. Trust me, I know."

For the first time in forever, the fourth prince broke into a genuine grin. "Thank you, I… I think you're beautiful too."

You grew shy at that, and wanting to break the ice, Yeosang picked up his brush, handing it to you. "Now, you must tell me how you know about Shin Sukju and his poems. Also, which is your favourite?"

For the remainder of the afternoon, he refrained from asking about your identity, and you were grateful for it. You feared he might distance himself if he learned of your betrothal to his brother, and the thought unsettled you. After all, finding a genuine friend was rare and precious, and you wished to cherish this fleeting moment of sincerity. You knew that by the next day, at the banquet, everyone, including Yeosang, would eventually discover who you truly were.

But you pushed that worry from your mind.

Just for now...

Your time together was cut short when the prince had classes to attend and could no longer stay. As he packed up his things and prepared to leave the pavilion, he turned to you. "Will you be at the banquet tomorrow?"

You swallowed and nodded, offering a small smile. "Yes, I'll be there."

His face lit up with a beaming smile. "Great! I’ll see you there, my lady."

You rose from your seat and bowed. "See you, Your Highness."

Once Yeosang had departed, you sank back into your seat, lost in contemplation. So this was the prince your father had told you you were fortunate not to be wed to? Of course, you knew that if you had been matched with him, he might not have been as courteous as he had been today. Before arriving in Joseon, you had heard nothing but unflattering remarks about him. He was rumoured to be a rebellious brat, the least appealing prince among his brothers.

Yet, meeting him in person, you found the reality strikingly different.

Sure, the rebellious reputation might have some truth, but people can change. As for the claim of his being unappealing, you couldn't fathom how a mere birthmark could diminish his allure. In your eyes, Yeosang was extraordinarily handsome, and the mark only seemed to enhance his unique charm.

Could it be that you were developing a small crush on your soon-to-be brother-in-law? Maybe so, but who could blame you? His kindness, coupled with his striking appearance, made it nearly impossible not to feel some affection. Perhaps it was this harmless little infatuation that provided a semblance of comfort and sanity amidst the turmoil of your new life.

You allowed yourself a small, wistful smile. For now, you would hold on to this tender feeling, as it was one of the few bright spots in the otherwise daunting reality you faced.

Heh, a silly little crush wouldn't hurt.

After the royal tutor had left, the fourth prince found himself alone in the library, a satisfied smile tugging at his lips as he gazed at the parchment before him. Your handwriting, delicate yet confident, adorned the page. He was thoroughly impressed by your breadth of knowledge, especially given that you were a foreigner. You had shared with him your passion for the liberal arts and how you had delved into them in your home library. It was refreshing to meet someone so genuinely curious and non-judgmental. You were a rare find in a world often quick to judge and dismiss.

His anticipation for the banquet grew, eager to continue your intellectual exchange and perhaps learn even more from you. This fleeting joy, however, was interrupted by a familiar voice.

"You seem to be in high spirits, my prince. Could it be because of the banquet? You've heard the news, haven't you?" Royal Secretary Choi's voice interrupted his thoughts. As he looked up, his smile faltered slightly upon meeting the secretary's inquisitive gaze.

"Heard? About what?" Yeosang inquired, his brows knitting together.

"Wait… you haven't? General and Lady Park will be attending. Last time we spoke, you mentioned wanting to see her, didn't you?" San replied, his tone laced with curiosity.

The mention of Lady Park swiftly altered his mood. Thoughts of your newfound friendship evaporated, overshadowed by the grim realisation. Although he had reconciled with the fact that she would never be his, the prospect of seeing her again—now pregnant and with her husband—was a painful reminder of his loss. The thought of facing them, of witnessing their happiness, stirred a deep unease within him. Was he truly prepared for this?

"I see. Thank you for the information, Secretary Choi. I'll see you at the banquet tomorrow," Yeosang said, gathering his belongings and leaving for his chambers. He needed solitude to grapple with the revelation and to ready himself for the emotional challenge ahead.

"We'd like to extend our gratitude to all distinguished guests here today to celebrate the union between Joseon and Ruhon. May I present to you the match that will make all of this possible: our very own Ninth Prince Yeochan and the beautiful Princess Sarisu of Ruhon. Their Highnesses will be officially wed in a month. Now, let us all use this opportunity to congratulate the new couple on their impending marriage and wish them an eternity of happiness," the King of Joseon announced.

Oh. There she is.

Yeosang blinked. There you were, standing before the assembled guests. Indeed, you were present. And, of course, you were the Ruhon princess sacrificed for the peace treaty. The puzzle pieces began to fit together. That explained your knowledge and undeniable class—qualities far beyond those of any mere noblewoman. He supposed he shouldn't have been too surprised.

As if on cue, you turned and met his gaze. Your eyes widened slightly upon seeing him, your expression turning guilty. You opened your mouth, ready to mouth an apology, but before you had the chance, a tap on his shoulder quickly shifted his attention.

Likewise, your fiancé cleared his throat, sensing your distraction. He murmured in your ear, "Focus, princess. Don't you dare embarrass me." You blinked and nodded. While people on the outside might coo and assume the Ninth Prince was a loving fiancé, only you know the reality behind his facade.

"There you are, my prince!" the royal secretary called out. "The general and his wife are just over there," he informed, nodding toward the area where the couple could be seen. Seonghwa was deep in conversation with his handpicked military strategist, General Officer Song, while his wife was engaged in a chat with one of the royal physicians nearby.

Yeosang's breath hitched as soon as his eyes landed on the pregnant woman. In an instant, all thoughts of you and the revelation of your identity as the foreign princess meant to marry his brother vanished. All he could see and think about was the general's wife. It was the first time he had seen her since her wedding with General Park, and she looked… beautiful, as always. In fact, she seemed even more beautiful now, glowing with the radiance of motherhood.

Oh god, he realised he was still far from getting over her. Would he ever get over her? He didn't know, but for now, just for now, he needed to talk to her.

Taking a deep breath, he started toward her, his heart pounding with every step. As he approached, her laughter reached his ears, a sound that once brought him immense joy and now brought a bittersweet ache. It took her a moment to notice him, needing the royal physician she was speaking with to signal his presence. Her eyes widened in surprise when she turned to see him, starting to bow, but he stopped her before she could do so.

"It's been a while, my lady. Would you... care to catch up?" he asked.

She bit her lip, turning to meet her husband's warm gaze. The general nodded, indicating the decision was hers. Turning back to face the prince, she beamed. "Of course, Your Highness. Shall we talk over some snacks? Pregnancy cravings, you know," she joked, and he agreed, guiding her to the refreshments table.

"So, how have you been?" Yeosang asked, his voice laced with a mix of hope and sorrow.

"I've been well, thank you," she responded, her hand instinctively moving to rest on her belly. "And you? How have you been?"

He hesitated, searching for the right words. "I've been… managing. It's good to see you looking so well."

She smiled again, a hint of sadness in her eyes. "It's good to see you too, Your Highness. I heard you've been doing well with your studies and your duties."

The fourth prince nodded, unable to tear his gaze away from her. "Yes, I've been keeping busy." He paused, taking a deep breath. "I just wanted to say… congratulations. You look radiant."

"Thank you," she said softly, her smile genuine. "It means a lot coming from you."

He gulped, pausing briefly before meeting her eyes. "You are happy, aren't you? The general... he's treating you well, yes?" He knew that San had already assured him of this once, but he needed to hear it from her to be fully convinced, to properly let go.

The lady softened and nodded. "I am, my friend. I feel like the happiest woman on earth. I assure you, you don't have to worry about me. And yes, my husband is very good to me. I promise you, I'm telling the truth," she added with a hint of jest.

"That's good. That's all that matters to me, my lady. Promise me you'll invite me over once the baby's born," the fourth prince said, despite the light ache in his chest.

"Of course, Your Highness! You'll be the first I'll invite!" she replied, laughing warmly.

The two exchanged a few more words, their conversation unknowingly catching most people's eyes in the hall, given their well-known history. For those craving drama, it was slightly anticlimactic to see the two get along so well. While the King and Queen exchanged proud smiles, the ninth prince was less than pleased, again overshadowed by his elder brother. Even on his special day, Yeosang managed to steal the spotlight.

The fourth prince sensed all eyes on him, growing slightly self-conscious. He wasn't clueless; he hadn't been naive enough to ignore that his failed attempt to win General Park's wife had been the talk of the palace. People weren't scrutinising him merely for his birthmark and rebellious tendencies anymore, but also for his brave yet foolish pursuit of a taken woman—one who belonged to one of the most intimidating and feared individuals in all of Joseon.

Knowing it was time to make himself scarce, he took one last, long look at the lady he still held feelings for, reminding himself it was time to truly let go. She was happy, with child, about to build a family with her husband. It was wrong for him to still feel this way.

"I wish you happiness, my lady. May you have a safe delivery, and I look forward to meeting your mini you," he said, his voice tinged with genuine warmth and a lingering sorrow.

She giggled softly, nodding. "Thank you, my prince. I wish you all the happiness in the world as well."

With that, Yeosang finally bid the lady goodbye, not forgetting to shoot the general a grateful nod before making his way out of the hall. He needed somewhere quiet to organise his thoughts and emotions. As he walked away, the murmurs and whispers of the court followed him, a stark reminder of the weight of his actions and the expectations placed upon him.

Reaching a secluded garden within the palace grounds, now adorned with lanterns hanging from the trees as part of the celebration, he allowed himself to breathe deeply, the cool night air filling his lungs. The moonlight cast gentle shadows, and the lanterns emitted a soft glow, while the distant sounds of the banquet faded into the background. Alone with his thoughts, he closed his eyes, letting the reality of the situation wash over him.

He had seen her happiness, her radiant glow as an expectant mother, and it brought him a strange sense of peace. It was time to move forward, to let go of the past, and to find his own path to happiness.

Taking one last deep breath, he straightened up, a newfound resolve settling within him. It was time to face the future, whatever it might hold, with a heart unburdened by past regrets.

Time to move on, Kang Yeosang...

The night had never felt longer than it did now as you sat wearily beside your fiancé. You observed with curiosity as Prince Yeosang conversed with the beautiful Lady Park, catching the gossip from two palace maids nearby. So this was the woman who held the fourth prince's heart and was the reason for his significant change.

Love, indeed, was a strange force, altering people as soon as they were struck by its powerful emotions. You wondered if you would ever experience such feelings. But glancing to your left at your soon-to-be husband, you doubted it would ever happen. From here on, everything was merely a duty—this marriage, this commitment.

At some point, you noticed that Yeosang was no longer in sight. Ah, to leave as you please must be a luxury. Like him, you, too, would rather be anywhere but here. But with no choice, you remained seated, playing the role of the perfect fiancée to the ninth prince.

Nearing the end of the banquet, the overwhelming presence of false kindness around you became unbearable. Turning to Prince Yeochan, you forced a smile. "Your Highness, it seems the event is drawing to an end. I am feeling rather fatigued. May I please excuse myself?"

He turned to you, and you could see the effort it took for him not to roll his eyes as he too forced a grin. "Of course, love. Anything for my princess," he said, loud enough for his father to hear.

The King of Joseon nodded approvingly. "Go, my dear. The ninth prince shall attend to the remaining guests."

With a grateful bow, you departed, ignoring the searing gaze of your father on your back. You had avoided interacting with him all night; his presence made you sick to the core. If having a father meant having one like him, you would rather have none at all. You couldn't wait for him to leave, not wanting to see him any longer.

As soon as you were out of the hall, you dismissed the maids escorting you, preferring to be alone and sparing them the burden of accompanying the hated Ruhon princess. With a sigh of relief, your shoulders slumped, finally feeling a sense of freedom. You began walking aimlessly, letting your feet guide you wherever they pleased. Though you knew your way back to your quarters, you had no desire to return to that cage just yet. You needed fresh air, a moment of peace.

Your eyes sparkled in wonder when you stumbled upon a beautiful garden area illuminated by lanterns. The soft glow of the lanterns cast gentle shadows, creating a magical atmosphere. You paused, taking in the sight, feeling a sense of calm wash over you. The night air was cool and refreshing, a stark contrast to the stifling atmosphere of the banquet hall.

Wandering deeper into the garden, you savoured the solitude. The sounds of the banquet faded into the distance, replaced by the rustling of leaves and the soft chirping of crickets. The garden felt like a sanctuary, a place where you could temporarily escape the expectations placed upon you.

Your breath hitched when you finally spotted a familiar figure sitting by the cobblestone ledge, facing a small pond. Carefully, you stepped towards him, unsure. Hearing your footsteps, he turned, causing you to freeze. With a small chuckle, he gestured to the spot beside him.

"Oh, hey there. Take a seat, princess." Your heart skipped a beat at the way he addressed you, genuine and without sarcasm, unlike your fiancé. And so you did, settling down beside him cautiously.

You swallowed nervously, avoiding his gaze, and asked in a whisper, "Aren't you angry with me, Your Highness? For deceiving you?"

He raised a brow in surprise and replied, "Why would I be, princess? Technically, I never inquired about your identity, and you haven't told me any lies. There is nothing for you to feel bad over, and absolutely no reason for me to be displeased. If anything, I'm quite happy to learn that you'll be staying here. You know, it's not often I encounter someone with a mind as exceptional as mine," he added with a teasing smile, giving you a gentle nudge on the shoulder.

A laugh escaped you, and you turned to face him, your heart fluttering at the sight of his warm and pretty smile. He extended his hand towards you. "Friends?"

You hesitated only for a moment before placing your hand in his. "Friends."

As you sat side by side, a tranquil silence enveloped you both. The gentle glow of lanterns bathed the garden in a soft, ethereal light, while the quiet murmurs of the pond added a serene backdrop to the moment. The moonlight shimmered on the water, creating a magical and soothing atmosphere.

You stole a glance at him, a genuine smile gracing your lips. For the first time since your arrival, the oppressive weight of loneliness seemed to lift. His presence beside you brought a sense of calm and companionship that had been sorely missing.

Perhaps, after all, being here wasn't so bleak. The evening's initial discomfort had given way to a blossoming connection. As you shared this peaceful moment, you couldn't help but think that this might be the start of something truly significant—a genuine friendship. The idea of finding someone who truly understood and accepted you kindled a warm hope in your heart.

I think I'll be just fine here, Mother.

« Preview of Part 2 »

"Thank you, my King," the mother of the nation murmured softly, holding her husband's hand as they settled into bed.

His Majesty raised an eyebrow, glancing at her with curiosity. "For what, my wife?"

The Queen sighed, her gaze distant. "For not forcing the fourth prince into this arranged marriage. I was afraid you might do so as part of his punishment, to settle him down once and for all."

The ruler of Joseon exhaled deeply. "I won't deny it, my Queen. I did consider it. But then I remembered Lady Park's words—he has endured enough already. It's my fault he became the man he is. I have not been the father he needed, and the least I can do now is honour his wishes, even if it means he chooses not to marry."

Her Majesty nodded, her voice gentle. "I have not been the best mother either. But perhaps it is time we make amends. This decision is for the best."

"It is," the King agreed, his tone resolute.

Surprise!! Didn't think I'd update on a Wednesday but long story short, I got injured and am on medical leave today. So, I figured, why not use this time to write? HAHA

As always, thank you for reading and let me know your thoughts! <3

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[factual-fantasy]

27 ASKS! :00 THANK YOU!! :}} 🧈

@amoonlight007

I'm indifferent to it. I know of it and have seen a lot of people play it, buuuut it doesn't really catch my interest much.. :( 💔

If he was starving or dehydrated.. he probably could have :( Not sure what he'd see or hear though..

@neo-metalscottic

AAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!! :DD 💖💖

Although unfortunately I cannot reveal anything without spoiling stuff..

Though I can say that the animatronics- new and old, are not fully aware of Fazbear Entertainments history.. 👀

@badlyblurry

WAAAAATHANKNYOU SO MUCH!!! 😭😭💖😭THIS MADE MY DAY SO MUCH BETTER FR THANK YOU SO MUCH!! YOU'RE TOO KIND!!💖💖💖

I think there is yeah :0

Well of course :0 But considering Seam and Jevil's trauma with Spade King.. if they ever saw a Lancer they likely would have just turned the other way in discomfort-

I feel like either Peso, Dashi or Captain Barnacles. :0

Other than maybe effecting his magic in someway..? I cant think of anything :0

That world looks beautiful! Yet also spooky <XD I don't know anything about Worldless but if its safe, they'll stay a while. :0

I feel like none of the Octonauts get seasick. Considering their species, line of work, and life experience..

But maybe if there's a crazy storm of sorts,, mayyybe.. Tweak.? wouldn't feel the best? But it'd be less sea sick and more like a headache. :(

I don't intend for them to encounter anything like that no.. <:/ But if they did? They would FREAK OUT. You bet the Octopod would be stationed nearby for months as the Octonauts studied the sunken city XD

Oh hugs for sure. Angsty? Wholesome? It doesn't really matter. A hugs a hug and I love drawing them 🤗

XDD I'm glad you like what you see! And I'm technically into Undertale atm! Well, its a bit more focused on Deltarune characters. (Seam and Jevil) But there's a handful of Undertale characters in there as well! :}}

XDDD THANK YOU SO MUCH!! :D And yes indeed! I am the culprit behind the silly jester men and their very large spider/human DJ friend XDDD

I'm not familiar with tarot cards, so I haven't thought about it no.. <:/ Sorry!

@rubydraft

AAAAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I DON'T HABE THE WORDF- THIOS IS SO KIND!! THANK YOU!!! STUFFING THIS ASK UNDER MY PILLOW SO I CAN WAKE UP AND READ IT AGAIN EVERY MORNING FRFR 💖💖😭💖

KXKSXCKJ FR THO IT'D BE LIKE THAT XDD

@khoiazo

I think they'd be too disturbed by the burning corpse on the ground to even realize that you were dancing <XD

I think that Fazbear entertainment doesn't add more characters because its a lot more complex than we might think.

Not only do you have to design and build the animatronic and its personality. Which would include probably thousands of dollars in work and trouble shooting to make one that is as advanced as the others..

You also have to set up an attraction for it. You have to set up marketing, plushies, clothes, toys, themed food, etc. You have to hire employees to run the attraction, you also have to train said employees on how to run the new attraction. You have to get handlers for the new animatronic, build another green room on Rockstar row, redo all the maps in the Pizzaplex to accommodate for the new attraction.

This also includes updating the fazwatches/making new fazwatches to hand out. Every single staff bot has to be updated in order to be made aware of the new animatronics presence and how to interact with it.

Like. Soooooo much would go into adding a new animatronic its crazy-

Jevil feels bad for his original counterpart. Because he's still locked up in a cell..

Seam is probably jealous of his original, thinking that he got off easy. He doesn't even have shackles..

Goner kid doesn't envy her original at all. Considering her original is still lost in the void somewhere..

Grillby had a run in with his original.. it did not go well..

Asgore does not envy his original at all. He cant imagine how it would feel for his children to pass, and his wife to leave him out of disgust...

River feels.. a bit indifferent to her original I imagine..

@elegysonnet

I do! Somewhat-

A family member introduced me to the web comic a few years ago. And I kept up with it for a while.. Eventually though it stopped updating. I was bummed. Figuring that something must have happened..

..Only to find out that they were working on a pilot animation the whole time and are as alive as ever! Still haven't sat down and watched the pilot like 9 months later-- 💔

As for my opinion on the comic, the artwork is fantastic. But I don't got two braincells to rub together and don't understand/remember the story so uh.. <:D yeah...

Now thankfully I don't think it would ever come to that-

Even after someone as powerful as an Asgore joined their group, Jevil is still endlessly paranoid and risks nothing when it comes to Seams/the groups safety.

If anyone found out that he could dimension hop? He would immediately assume that he is no longer safe around those people and would flee that AU.

And if someone did take him well.. now you've got a mighty king and a determined human on your tail. Which are not good people to have after you-

Though I suppose all of that aside.. if that did happen? The only one who would remember is Frisk. And she would be greatly disturbed.. Upon a reset, she would tell Jevil very sternly that this AU is not safe. Jevil wouldn't question her for a second and would instantly open up a mirror and they would bounce-

Oh! I'm glad to hear that the "controversy" was nothing serious! :0 Thank you for the info! :}

Jevil probably told the kiddos to be on the look out for a new hat. He could have told them he likes to wear a hat but doesn't like his jester one. They would understand the assignment and would be on the look out :0

Sometime after Peach was rescued the bros were brought over to Daisy's kingdom to meet her. Kind'a just a "meet the legendary heroes that saved my best friends life" situation.

It wasn't love at first sight- but Luigi did notice her. Not just for her beauty, but for her bravery and personality as well. 💚🧡

@beryl-shade

XD Made me imagine a home alone situation. The Glamrocks setting up slap-stick humor type booby traps to deter the bad guys XDD

[tittyinfinity]

"Yes they're both genocidal, but I'm going to go for the one who doesn't take away our rights!"

Who's "our?"

Are those who have already had rights stripped nothing but collateral damage?

How far will it go before "our" includes fewer and fewer people?

When more and more people are told "I'm sorry, I know you're being hurt, but I have to do what keeps MY rights safe."

Who will be left to fight for you after you've thrown everyone else under the bus for your own personal comfort?

When will this become serious enough for you to fight in a way other than handing a permission slip to a candidate and hoping for the best?

Which city would US bombs have to be dropped on before it's considered "our" rights that are being affected? Which people would have to be detained at the border? Which children would have to starve?

Who is "our?"

[millportdingo]

TSC Motifs/Themes/Whatever

Dogs

Starved dog, leash metaphors, cardboard dog, obedience. I think Jean represented as an obedient, loyal dog is pretty straight-forward. I think it's interesting that in the extra content, Nora described him as an angry cat when he came to Evermore. He left as a starved and beaten dog. I wonder where this arc goes, though. Like, he takes a chain around his neck from Renee -per Neil's philosophy, is this "collar" his first reason not to slip the [Moriyama investment] leash? Also Jeremy has always wanted a dog. I guess this piece is a little harder for me to wrap my head around, maybe I'm overthinking it, but maybe he's the right kind of [s]Dom[/s] [s]owner[/s] person for Jean. He has the authority "I'm your captain," but he pairs it with an equalizer "I'm your partner". He pushes Jean, but he holds the hard boundaries. He's intrigued by Jean's scoop neck deep blue shirt - I think partly for the personal growth to wear color and partly because it allows him to see Jean's collarbone. He shivers with the sound of "Yes, Jeremy." I wonder if "my mom is allergic to dogs" is foreshadowing his family's reaction to Jean.

2. Safety

Neil's arc was about hope, finding a future in a futureless situation. Jeremy's had an idea of the future, the perfect court, but his big thing is safety. "Safe" and its variations appear in TSC 48 times. This boy is really not asking for much, but Jeremy makes him feel safer which is just too sweet. Also, tighten those screws for safety..

3. Childhood

At the beginning of the book, Jean knows immediately that he is not in the Nest, because he knows every inch of it. He feels like he knows everything about the world and he often insults people by calling them children. His childhood innocence was stolen from him at the Nest, and outside of it, he regains pieces of it. He wonders at the vastness of the world, he learns skills he never had before (shopping, cooking). I had a hard time when I found out he was 19 (ie 14 and 16 at the time of some really unpleasant things). I didn't understand why he had to be two years younger. But the protection and corruption of innocence is a big part of his story. We see that acutely with his sister's story and it allows him to turn on his parents without guilt. The duck/duckling motif is cute too. When he first comes to Evermore, Thea describes him as a little duckling. He associates little yellow ducks with his childhood and baby sister.

4. Air?

Being able to breathe is core to the safety thing. When Jean feels least safe, he can't breathe. One of his earliest revelations about being Riko's pet was the buried alive punishment, and pressing his face against the sparse airholes. Then there's the waterboarding thing. You'll see Jean mentions being unable to breathe when he feels threatened and grabs at his throat. Conversely his happy things include breeze and open sky (rainbow and the open road). When Grayson appears, Jean says he can no longer feel the breeze, and he is particularly disturbed by the neck biting. There are lots of throat and neck things going on in the book too and maybe it's a stretch but burning (ie eating away at oxygen) comes up several times too.

[rozaceous]

tcba ch 26 outline

sasuke pov. once again, draft is an outline, and this was written before i wrote out ch 24, so there might be some redundancies

also includes how i was going to end the ch

getting back to ame post-summit

pein/konan: you stirred things up but failed in your mission. not a single dead kage between you?

sasuke: if you want something done the way you want, do it yourself

interrupted w tobi on how they're bolstering akatsuki's numbers

zetsu's recruited kabuto so uh, hey senpai lol

and wow the tension between konan+pein and tobito can be cut w a knife

deidara and kisame out doing their thing to catch the other jinchuuriki, have used the summit as distraction to sneak in, they aren't back yet

so a clear 3 factions

pein and konan treat mariko and sasuke as tobito's toadies since they were recruited on his insistence, kabuto is assoc w mariko

but kabuto is there for the eye of the moon plan to come to fruition, make a clone army or something something w the use of edo tensei

mariko keeping mum on that one since she's not sure how much of kabuto being here is him thinking that it sounds like a genuinely good idea that he's committed to following through, and how much is him being along for the ride

sasuke can hardly call him a betrayer or whatever since he joined the same cause they did, but still feels gross

also he knows that tobito is 'madara' and the continued deception is irritating

so 'wtf is the eye of the moon plan' has to be explained, itachi explained it some but he wants to hear it form tobito besides not really being able to say that itachi told them already since they supposedly killed him

prev encounter w just pein and konan acting as directive was focused on the tyranny of the great nations and the flaws of shinobi society, so even tho he's aware that this is a thing it still feels extremely out of left field

so obviously this is bullshit and the skepticism will not stay out of his voice

and if it's tobi explaining this all, then it's super natural for him to then turn to konan and pein and "y'all good with this?" and immediately prod at the inherent tension dividing them, esp since deidara and kisame aren't there to buffer

and man it's like farting in a quiet room: pein and konan politely ignoring that there is this divide in the leadership and tobito and zetsu not wanting to exacerbate anything

tobito to sasuke: this is the only way to assure that there is peace

sasuke: by shoving everyone into a genjutsu against their will and giving them all their wildest dreams as an illusion? until what, everyone dies in the real world? until they starve to death? or is it only that chakra users would be sustained by the combined chakra of the jinchuuriki? or is that chakra store used up just by catching everyone in the genjutsu to begin with? are people's comatose bodies just getting eaten by wild animals or what's up with this logistically?

basically this is a load of unsubstantiated waffle, sasuke was taught genjutsu by orochimaru, who tho lacking in a doujutsu was premier at them and understood them on a technical level that's beyond virtually everyone else

also sasuke: your plan is shit, the whimsical thinking of children, and i'm not interested in a pretense of peace, i'm interested in justice

and mariko is totally down with this as a distinction (lowkey is doing an internal fistpump bc what a cool line bro and what a worthwhile philosophical delineation)

this is less internal than she thinks, can't quite keep a straight face

tobito maybe asking if mariko has a similar modus operandi

mariko: sasuke and i are a team

"i see"

sasuke: "does this mean we can stop this entire farce now, tobi" maybe that he's been looking for him, why was itachi so committed to him having the mangekyo/implication that he would need it

pein laughing, like "he's got you there"

kabuto is just ready to bust out the popcorn, now this is intrigue

so woo woo the dark chuckle, ahaha yes i am madara, your forebear

mariko: hm doubt (but also wtf i guess we're going w confrontation after all, have to destabilize this dude as much as i can if i want any hope of living thru the aftermath, but i guess also let's set him against konan and pein)

which sort of is sasuke's play, if there's a divide in intent here then it's prime time to force this confrontation since there's a chance of getting pein and konan to either stand down or join in, and deidara and kisame aren't present to act as other variables to control (kabuto is a non-issue in his brain no matter which way he falls lmao)

and this would catch konan and pein's attention bc they have been operating under the assumption that he is madara, or at least not otherwise caring

so mariko whips out: you're uchiha obito, aren't you

sasuke wondering how they went from 'obito's right eye never reclaimed/his body never found' to 'obito lived and is evil now' but willing to go along w it bc he trusts her instincts/she's rarely wrong in his experience/even if she is wrong, she's saying it for a purpose

can shun sense the zetsu movement? if yes then it's helpful if he's present for this whole discussion/debrief

confrontation

pein and konan staying out of it/focus is on containment (wouldn't let zetsu run off, but not fighting unless they're attacked first)

mariko+kabuto fighting zetsu vs sasuke fighting obito

attempts to slice and dice him fall thru bc he just reforms

mariko: fire it is!

sasuke struggling w the intangibility combo'd w the (essentially) teleportation, mariko needing more juice

they switch off

and ofc kabuto and sasuke look at each other like 'ugh, this guy again' but needs must or whatever

sasuke able to get his fire jutsu hot enough to scorch the plant goo? or lightning something, idk

how do they even kill him in canon

after sufficient chakra expenditure, sasuke released orochimaru

mariko had been trying to save chakra in order to use kotoamatsukami and letting sasuke be the heavy hitter

was planning to whammy obito but has to use it on orochimaru?

the rest of team7 arrives amidst this chaos

ofc adding kakashi to this particular psychological bender of obito's is always a good idea

mariko: shit, bc she'd been meaning to take care of obito (reform or otherwise) so shishou wouldn't have to

basically things conclude so that:

pein and konan go on their merry way ruling ame, disillusioned, talk no jutsu'd, whatever

obito reformed??? whatever. basically sasuke takes his remaining sharingan as a way of saying he's not worthy of having it (clan shit) and kakashi essentially defects from konoha to be his babysitter/seeing eye dog

orochimaru dead

zetsu dead

kabuto affirmed to stick w mariko (she may do some move to save him? debatable)

naruto not going back to konoha, but also feels estranged from his teammates (except sai lol). he still doesn't get why mariko did what she did/can't really grapple w her killing ppl, and he doesn't quite jive w sasumari's plan to destabilize the shinobi village system (tho it's a bit more subtle than that? idk). i think he ends up as sort of a nomad and hanging out w gaara a lot

sasumari 4evah lol

have no idea what i'm doing to tie in ROOT stuff, but there's a thought there?

need to regroup w team hebi and itachi

itachi and kisame can have their bromance reunion lol

idk abt deidara, hm

how i was going to end the ch:

Mariko leans into him and Sasuke's knees give way, the two of them toppling to the ground in a messy sprawl, exhausted. His whole body is shaking with it. She pushes herself off of him just enough so that she's not crushing him, and the laugh she breathes out trembles. A cut on her cheek is still bleeding. "So," she says. "What's next?"

[bbygirl-aemond]

aegon's hypersexuality and unacknowledged victimhood

rape cw for this entire post, including rape of a minor

hello all i'm thinking of tom glynn-carney's aegon ii and wanted to put down some thoughts about his promiscuity. as a side note, i refuse to fuck with rapists and so in stormbreak i lean more towards the book rather than the show when it comes to the rape and the child fighting pits (as in, those things have not happened). but i wanted to comment on a few things: his known penchant for sleeping around, his trip to the brothel with 13-year-old aemond, and his relationship with helaena.

these things probably also provide context for how he became what he is in the show, but i don't want this post to be used to excuse his rape of dyanna at all because nothing can excuse rape. let's discuss further:

if you re-watch hotd, take note of how many times aegon is touched, and the nature of that touch. he is kicked and berated by otto. alicent grips his face tightly and slaps him while shouting him. aemond tackles him to the floor and wrestles him into submission. criston holds his shoulder, yes, but to keep him from running away. alicent kisses his forehead, yes, but as part of a ceremony. the only time aegon receives a loving touch from anyone is when alicent grabs his arm to push him behind her at rhaenys's threat.

this is a boy who is so completely touch-starved he doesn't even know what he's missing even as he hungers for it.

from a psychological standpoint, it's very common for people deprived of affection to seek its closest approximation: the bodily contact required by sex. they can hide behind the defense of simply wanting pleasure, all while secretly treasuring the feeling of someone touching them. not to bruise, not to punish, not to restrain, just for pleasure. if they close their eyes, they can pretend it's for love, too.

i wouldn't be surprised if aegon had his first sexual experience when he was far too young. we see that he likes to slip away from the castle--and is somehow usually successful, despite all the scrutiny upon him due to his position. it's not a far reach to assume that an unhappy, unloved, touch-starved baby aegon might have wandered into a flea bottom brothel and discovered that touch didn't have to hurt. having this very warped relationship with sex while he was too young to understand what he was doing and how it was hurting him influences his entire adult personality.

this would also help to provide context for the completely whack decision to bring aemond to a brothel. at this point, aemond has lost his eye, and i've discussed before here that the injury represented a major turning point in their relationship. aegon has no demonstrated desire to belittle or mock or hurt aemond at any point after the eye incident. i don't think he did this malevolently. i think it was aegon, trying to think of what could help aemond to feel less ugly, less unlovable, turning to the only thing he knew of that could come even close to feeling like love and desire. it wasn't, of course, and he knew that, but it was the only balm he had to soothe his own hurt and it was the only one he knew to offer aemond.

i also really don't see enough discussion of how aegon is a victim of rape within his marriage to helaena. obviously helaena isn't given a choice in marrying aegon and having children with him, but neither is aegon. and we see aegon explicitly express that he doesn't want this, which we haven't actually seen from helaena.

there's a reason helaena says aegon only ever touches her when he's drunk. he cannot bring himself to endure rape when he is sober. there's a reason he ignores his children. they are the product of his own rape, by his own hand.

he feels that he has been forced into the position of perpetrator of assault against helaena, his baby sister. he is the rapist and yet he is also the victim and how is he meant to reconcile the two? how is he meant to look helaena in the eye when the sight of her makes his skin crawl with the memory of having to walk willingly to his own assault? of being forced to be the active party, unable to even lay there and dissociate the way alicent always did with viserys?

and not once does anyone acknowledge what has happened to him. even alicent, who should empathize with him the most, has no sympathy for him in this regard. why would she? she's the one who did this to him.

tldr aegon's relationship to sex is and always has been defined by his victimhood. he fell into dangerous patterns of abuse as a child that no one saved him from, and even as an adult is forced to carry out his own rape like i cannot emphasize enough how fucked up that part is. i don't think he's ever had an experience with sex that didn't make him feel like shit when it was over, if not during. and yet he keeps doing it, keeps hurting himself, because it's the closest thing he thinks he'll ever get--the closest thing he thinks he'll ever deserve--to love.

[icycoldninja]

reader comforting raiden during a panic attack? feeling some hurt/comfort mood and wanna see my guy again... (and cos i love the way you write him!)

Yes, yes! Enjoy!

Safe with me (MGR!Raiden x Reader angst/fluff)

Raiden had been through a lot in his life, from being used as a soldier when he was just a little boy to commit heinous crimes, to having his brain and spinal cord surgically removed, then implanted into a cyborg body against his will. He'd suffered a great deal, and as a result, had developed quite a few mental issues, including DID and anxiety.

DID was one thing; Jack the Ripper could easily be kept at bay as long as he turned on his pain inhibitors, but his anxiety was another thing. When he saw certain things, or heard about certain things, or was reminded of certain things, he couldn't help himself but worry, and when he worried, he began to feel the panic creeping over the edges of his consciousness.

Such was how he felt now, having returned home from a particularly harrowing mission. He'd had to rescue a group of children being transported across the country to serve as child soldiers for some despicable organization. Seeing those poor, starving, clearly traumatized yet so determined children reminded Raiden of himself, and for a moment, he wasn't a tough cyborg, but rather, a terrified boy who just wanted to go back to his quarters, curl up with his teddy bear, and cry until someone came to get him.

That's what Raiden did after freeing the children; he went home, headed straight for his room, and sat on the edge of the bed, his knees drawn up to his chest. He felt so scared for some reason, so frightened and tense. It was unbecoming of a professional such as him, but professionals are still human, aren't they?

You ended up walking in on the man shivering on the bed while hyperventilating and clawing at his own metal legs, his one visible eye wide and shaking with fear.

"Help me," He was whimpering, thrashing about like he was tied down. "Please help me...someone...anyone..."

It hurt you to see the man like this. He'd never been one to Crack under pressure, normally being very calm and always having at least an idea of what to do. To watch him shake and beg for help like an ordinary victim was both jarring and heartbreaking.

"Raiden, Raiden, I'm right here," You told him, rushing over and wrapping your arms around his shuddering shoulders. "I'm here, baby, I'm here. It's ok."

Raiden sucked in a deep, trembling breath, and clung onto you with all he had, his terrified expression clearly stating he was not in his right mind.

"Don't let them hurt me," He pleaded, clutching your arms so firmly, his claws dug into your skin.

"I won't," You assured him, pulling him closer to you, pressing his head against your shoulder. "You're safe, Raiden, safe with me."

He probably didn't hear you, since he didn't seem to be aware of where he was and what he was doing, but his body subconsciously relaxed and seemed to melt into your embrace. His mind might not be aware of it, but his body was--his heart was. He was safe with you, and always would be.

[aerequets]

Hello again!

I was wondering if you had any spy x family fic recs that are twiyor centric? AUs? I’m having trouble finding ones that are what I’m looking for. Ratings don’t matter. Anything from G to E would be appreciated! Thank you!!

boy oh BOY do i have twiyor fic recs !!!! it's like basically all i read LMAO and i am always on a hunt for more. i feel like i have read through a good chunk of what's on ao3 and i still feel starved. there's always my bookmarks you can sift through for twiyor fics, but for some more curated recommendations (and this is not gonna include all the ones i've lost my mind over, that's far too many, this is just what i can remember off the top of my head):

the living blues by @nire-the-mithridatist

GOD it would be such an understatement to say i am a huge fan of not only this work but EVERY WORK by this author because SHE HAS A WAY WITH WORDS OKAY. i avoid angst like the plague but i saw the happy ending tag to this fic and IT DIDN'T DISAPPOINT (chapter 6 is gonna be an epilogue)!!!!!!! AUGHHH this isnt even a good review im just yelling but yeah this is really good and also pretty much everything else by this author, i'll say it now so this list doesn't have numerous fics by the same person just do yourself a favor and read through what she's got if you haven't already

rated T, 5/6 chapters, currently 14k words

(edit: completed!)

With Kid Gloves by crownofrosegold on ao3

4 words: Mr Darcy Hand Flex

rated G, 1/2 chapters, currently 2.5k words

(edit: completed!)

the most yearning, pining, longing fic ever with the least physical touch ever. loid traces yor's gloves in his pocket with his thumb and its somehow intimate. yeah

it's been a hot minute since it's updated but the first chap can kinda be read as a standalone (to me) which is why i rec, even though i personally only go after finished fics for my own sanity :^) also its just too darn cute how can i not

How to Be a Supportive Husband by @nemaliwrites

rated T, 1/1 chapters, 910 words

short and sweet drabble of the most simpiest loid post reveal. what more could you want

MISSION: Bottom Feeder by SilverSupa on ao3

rated T, 2/4 chapters, currently 9.5k words

this one is just too good and funny LMAOO yor and loid are Peak Stupid and also Peak Attracted To Each Other so it's just. mm good mix. this one's also been a hot second since it's last update but i love it too much so its on this list

even when we're not together (will you stay with me?) by JaMills on ao3

rated T, 1/1 chapters, 4.5k words

gosh this is another one of those super good reads that make you sit and think after you're done. soulmate AU where they swap bodies as children until they meet. personally i'm not the most dedicated reader of aus where yor and loid meet as kids, but the way its handled here is just so good and adds to the story. it's also part of a series and the next installment is equally as good. this is another one of those authors that has a lot of quality stuff (although there's a good dash of angst which i keep my distance from JKFHISDH) so look through their page!

Enough by Frotu on ao3

rated T, 1/1 chapters, 4k words

EHEHE THIS ONE HAS ME GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET FR it is soooo cute. typical thing of yors coworkers getting into her head, she asks loid if what they have is enough, and... well.... you can read what happens from there ;] (spoiler: it's very cute)

a dream in charmeuse by selfetish (@selfetishizing ) on ao3

rated T, 2/2 chapters, 12k words

oh gosh, the prose in this is just?? so insanely good??? its such a pretty read. this is twiyor, yes, but it's also a deep dive into femininity and yor's understanding/rediscovery of it. i remember the first time i read it the opening scene of the first chapter was just so GOOD to me, i was like OMG i am not gonna forget this this is so iconic AND IT IS!!!!! i love me a good yor centric fic. we usually get more of twilight contemplation (i mean he has got the whole mission thing going on and hes our resident overthinker so, understandable) but this was such a nice look into yor's..,, like, fundamental building blocks?? if that makes sense?? its just good ok read it

"The Five Times Loid Forger Went Topless In Front of His Wife and the One Time She Reciprocated" Or “Bare-Chested in Berlint” by Talik_Sanis on ao3

rated M, 6/6 chapters, 17.5k words

that title should tell you all you need to know right LMAOOO it's just yor being incredibly horny, like embarrassingly so. she lacks a grip

again this is just 8 fics, where my bookmarks list are over 200 (yeesh) so feel free to look through those. i've also got some fics, most of which are twiyor lmao (brainrot i told you). and don't forget to show these awesome authors some love!

[walkawaysoreeyes]

11/3/2024 READING

Today i'm continuing on in Lamentations, we will be going over chapter 2. I will write down anything that stuck out to me, how the Lord may have used the word to talk to me and what i learned!

"Like an enemy He has strung His bow; His right hand is ready" Lamentations 2:4

We have a modern day saying that comes from the Bible. In Romans 8:31 "What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?" This verse in Lamentations shows us the exact opposite. Which is, If the Lord is against you, then who can be for you? Jerusalem has reached out to all of her allies and all they did was betray her, she has been overtaken and left deserted, her enemies are parading about that the great land has fallen. Jeremiah attempted to warn them of this downfall, he told them of his visions, and they rejected them and only believed in the ones about prospering. One thing that we need to understand about God, is that yes, He is loving and kind! He is also just and righteous; if we continuously disobey Him and His word, He has the right to get onto us and deliver His judgement as He sees fit!

"The law is no more, and her prophets no longer find visions from the Lord." Lamentations 2:9

"The spiritual institutions had also failed and could give no help. There were no faithful priests to teach the law, and the prophets were silent." (Enduring word.) If they already weren't following the laws set by God, how will they be doing now that the man-made laws are gone? Jerusalem must be in complete and utter chaos, there are no reliable leaders, she has no help, the people and children are starving, it's a warzone. It just goes on to make you think, why was it so much easier for them to follow man-made laws and to ignore the commandments from the Lord? For me, i think it's because they had a whole museum full of excuses to run from the Lord. That's one of the reasons that Jeremiah's message was so successful, because he took away their excuses!

"The elders of Daughter Zion sit on the ground in silence, they have sprinkled dust on their heads and put on sackcloth." Lamentations 2:10

The leaders, the ones who are meant to lead them in the right direction, are in shock. They probably never thought that this would happen to them. That's a normal thought to have even nowadays, but that is also a form of pride. In their shock all they are able to do is mourn and lament! The second half of this sentence is where i actually learned a lot! One of the things i have been working on is to analyze any words that may have stuck out to me while reading. The ones that stuck out to me were dust and sackcloth, and then you look at the name of the book we are reading, Lamentations. So, to lament is to deeply grieve or to feel sorrow, that's what this whole book is about. So, the elders or leaders are lamenting or mourning in easier terms. Stick with me now, so the dust is also another sign of mourning. They are mourning Jerusalem, because in Genesis we were made from dust and one day when we die, we will return to dust. Everything, including Jerusalem came from dust, hence "from dust to dust." Now the sackcloth, represents mourning and humbling yourself. The whole second half of that sentence is just them reiterating the pain and sorrow they are feeling. They have absolutely hit rock bottom in all terms of the saying.

"The Lord has done what he planned; He has fulfilled His word, which He decreed long ago." Lamentations 2:17

God is the ultimate promise keeper, He never goes back on His word! Why would we doubt that He would fulfill His word, just because it was judgement? Why are so many Christians incapable of knowing that God can and will deliver judgement? that's just something to think about, because if we can't see God as a righteous judge, are we truly in relationship with God and Jesus, or in a relationship with God that WE made Him out to be?

If you made it this far, thank you! i'm praying for you, feel free to leave any prayer requests or message me! Please, if you can, pray for my pupper, she's not doing the best right now, but God has His hand on her and the situation!

[furrbbyx]

I want dumb and pretty to be my calling card so bad that I'm crying about it

[boreal-sea]

I find your post about policy disingenuous. 1) because making it seem like; "it's just about Palestine" is incredibly racist in ways I don't have the spoons to explain right now. But 2), your list leaves out the very real and very racist policy actions that Biden has taken against prisoners and immigrants. Under Biden the situation in prisons and at the border has gotten considerably worse than under Trump. He literally has more children in cages than Trump ever did. But apparently children in cages are only bad when Cheeto Man does it.

I'm not the one making it "just about Palestine", the people screaming "Genocide Joe!" are the ones making it just about Palestine. I'm trying to get people to look at literally any other issue besides Palestine - that's the entire reason I made that chart, to PROVE there's so much more at stake than "just Palestine". Stop blaming single-issue voters on ME when you're actually angry at THEM.

I am in fact currently going through the entire list because a different Anon claimed Biden is not "for" any of the things on the list. It is going to take a long time. But I will tackle your specific concerns.

Biden and immigration

It is frankly unfair to compare the number of people at the border under Biden to Trump's era, because their immigration policies are very different.

Yes, immigration at the border gone up since Biden took office. Most of the encounters at the borders have been with asylum seekers. And yes, technically there are more children "in cages" that there was when Trump was in office... because Trump wasn't letting children into the country at all. Biden is not turning them away, unlike Trump, who cited "COVID concerns" as his reason for turning starving and dehydrated children away from the border. In Trump's case, this was actually just straight up racism, because he hates Mexicans. He also hates Muslims, and enacted many immigration and travel bans against people from majority-Muslim nations. So yeah, of course there were less people being processed through immigration centers: Trump was turning them all away.

Your comparison, therefore, is extremely disingenuous. I don't think kids in custody is good, but I also think it's slightly better than kids dying of thirst in the desert or being forced to return to unsafe places.

Source: Politifact Fact-Check

Biden and prison reform

As for Biden's actions towards prisoners: Biden has been big on criminal justice reform his entire term. Here is a list of some things (among many more) he has done for criminal justice reform:

A majority of the people he nominated to appoint to courts around the country were people of color and/or women, in an effort to increase diversity in the criminal justice system.

He placed a moratorium on the death penalty.

He ordered the Department of Justice to not renew contracts with private (for-profit) prisons for federal prisoners.

He has pardoned and commuted many federal sentences for non-violent drug-related crimes (he has no control over non-federal convictions).

He provided grants to encourage the hiring of people with prior convictions.

He enacted a program to ensure prisoners leaving prison were given proper temporary IDs, which the were not in the past.

He pardoned federal offenses for the simple possession and use of marijuana.

He expanded Pell grants for prisoners to be able to obtain degrees during and after they leave prison

Added more options for prisoners with loans to consolidate and get onto repayment plans as low as $0 a month.

He enacted the First Step act, which facilitates prisoner reentry to society, rehabilitation, and reduces prisoner numbers in federal prison, including the release of over 30,000 prisoners.

He reduced the checking of criminal records in hiring processes for federal positions, enabling more people to be hired to those positions.

Added 19 new recidivism-reduction programs (programs to reduce the chances someone will end up back in jail).

This is not an exhaustive list. He has done EVEN MORE for criminal justice reform than this. You can just google this stuff, it's not hard to find.

Sources:

WhiteHouse.Gov

NBC News

Times.Com

[whamicon]

“My life is more difficult than anyone else's on the planet, and yes, I'm including starving children, so don't ask!”

[knifeeater]

Hello i'm illiterate. What does the iwtv dante inferno i need protection from the wolves post mean. I'm dumb i'm so sorry and i. Desperately need to know

hey, please don't apologize! i was worried this would be kind of unclear because i skipped over a connection in the tags: i have a pet theory of louis walking daniel through the nine circles of hell and showing him his sins along the wayside, similar to the structure of dante's inferno, louis being the ghostly guide virgil aswell as the topological space himself (sometimes i factor in armand as virgil but let's keep it simple for this purpose). there is a reference to the forest of suicides in s1, so louis as an autobiographical narrator is certainly aware of dante and we know how he loves to weave in literary devices.

this is about guilt as foreshadowing, primarily concerning louis' culpability in claudia's death. in the first two images we see louis breaking a birds wings, hoping claudia will eat them, and shortly after lestat makes a hidden reference to armand cutting off his fledling and first love nicki's hands. in the same episode lestat calls claudia a baby bird. if we read iwtv as louis consciously including those references into his narration, we can interpret this as a connection to him prompting claudia's turning, the pain she expresses of never being able to grow up and experience 'flying from the nest' as it were but being kept in a perpetual subjugated daughter state. i believe louis' feelings of guilt express themselves here in a parallel of having a hand in her wings being clipped to having, through his passivity and active alienation towards claudia in paris, a second-hand in her eventual death.

so at the deepest center of dante's hell is a frozen lake, colcytus, which is reserved for the worst sinners, the traitors: caina for traitors of kin, antenora for traitors of city and state, ptolemea for betraying hospitality and judeca after judas iscariot for betraying your lord (lol yes ik this is a medieval text). At last in the frozen bottom of hell is the devil, 'dis', lucifer who betrayed god himself.

the quote from inferno is from the ptolemea section, in which a man forever gnawing anothers head laments him and his children being incarcerated in a tower where they starved, something he references as being hunted like wolves ('i was being hunted'). he now forever rips apart his cruel jailor with 'long fangs'. colcytus overlaps in my mind pretty well with the deepest layers of louis' very christian/catholic shame - the 'murder' of his brother and 'sister' claudia, the betrayal of his community, falling in love with a bad man who's a danger to his child (x2), betraying lestat with a judas kiss and at the end lucifer himself, the fallen angel - am i the devil, am i of the devil. in colcytus a lot of references to blindness and being veiled to the meaning of your own story appear which is very interesting to narrative agency and louis' self-justification too.

then ethel cain references dante in ptolemea - claudia is the daughter of cain, the man who pressed the same blade to his brothers sternum he would later kill his lover with, the one he's never quite sure didn't have a hand in paul's death. before her 'conception' louis makes a deal with the devil. lestat the aristocrat, the wolf hunter, louis accepts his love and his motives. him taking on the page of hearts from this trickster is a moral choice concerned, as every deal with the devil is, not just with love but also power, money and influence. it is a choice which leads to claudias birth into death, her parents union born out of the dark gift, birthing a child into sin, violence and pain. what's interesting in cains text is the interchangeability of the wolf and the hunter which is one of my favorite themes in literature, one i noted in tvl aswell - lestat's stylized (himself) as a werewolf figure, an outsider, hunted, wild and uncontainable. rice was influenced surely by angela carter's writing about this kind of otherness and masochistic attraction to violence which reveals an animality in yourself - louis' favorite movie isn't 'company of wolves' for nothing. to close out this meandering connection i thought it was interesting that this lyric ends with sublime, quick burning white light - the luminous fall of lucifer morningstar is certainly a theme in louis first season story arc.

thank you for coming back on this and giving me a chance to unhinge my jaw about it, always happy to talk. 🖤

[tezuka-brainrot]

Just a concept I'm not gonna do anything with but Astro Boy swap au. (Yes Shadow from 03 has me obsessed with the concept of android Tenma.) A young boy genius Tobio Tenma watches his father die in a horrific lab accident and sets out to build a robot replica.

After a year or two, Tobio starts to think about how this robot just isn't like his father. He deactivates it and hides it in the basement because he's to guilty to sell the robot Umataro. But eventually Skunk Kusai steals it and after failing to turn it on he just pawns the thing off to Hamegg who decides to make him into a clown because he's not strong enough to be a fighter.

At first the robot (I don't have a name for him) enjoys his job. He likes making children laugh. But eventually stumbles upon the closets full of starved robots. Enraged, robot Tenma gets into a fight with Hamegg which ends with the circus accidentally catching fire. This plays out like the Astro Boy scene, he saves everyone including Hamegg and winds up in the news. This draws the attention of Umataro's friend Hiroshi Ochanomizu who is both horrified and fascinated by the concept of a replica of his dead boyfriend best friend. At first Ochanomizu is a little weary but he grows to pity the android and lets him live with him and be his lab assistant or something.